Uneven Odds

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/32023405.

Rating: Mature
Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply
Category: F/F
Fandom: The Owl House (Cartoon)
Relationship: Lilith Clawthorne/Reader, Luz Noceda & Reader, Lilith Clawthorne &
Everyone, Amity Blight/Luz Noceda
Character: Lilith Clawthorne, Eda Clawthorne, Luz Noceda, Amity Blight, King (The
Owl House), Hooty (The Owl House)
Additional Tags: Raven Beast Lilith Clawthorne, Lilith Clawthorne Redemption, no beta
we die like men, reader is a gay mess, pretty much like me to be
honest, Lilith is a nerd who doesn't know a thing about flirting, pretty
much like me again, Eda is THAT kind of sister, Luz ships it, Hooty and
Lilith bffs, Angst, Fluff, Eventual Smut, I just love her
Series: Part 1 of My gods always looked like you
Stats: Published: 2021-06-18 Completed: 2021-09-19 Chapters: 18/18 Words:
110785

Uneven Odds
by allysworld

Summary

You have fallen into a strange world, but the Owl House residents have welcomed you.
You certainly believe you need to find your way home, but each day it's a little harder to
know where home is when you glance at a certain witch with heterochromatic eyes and
pointy ears.
 Chapter 1

You were walking and you had no idea how long you’ve been walking. The words of the woman
who brought you into this world still seem to cut your skin like knives, no matter how far from
home you are now.

Well if you could call that place home now.

Nobody was supposed to know. You’ve managed to keep yourself in the closet since you were 12,
8 years hiding from your family. But then college came. You should never have drunk that much
and then that girl with an easy smile and pretty eyes. You should have been more careful, but you
were already kissing her before you could ratiocinate it properly.

And then the photos were all over your class’s social media. And then your mother put all your
things in a backpack. “Freak”, “Disgrace”, “Whore”. You remember those, but you’re sure there
were others. There were slaps, punches. There were screams. And your father watched. He just
watched as your mom kicked you out of the house, like you were nothing. As if you were only
good for them while you were that perfect little girl they painted in their heads. You didn’t argue. It
would be like this. You knew it would be like this from the beginning, that’s why you’ve never
thought of telling them in the first place.

There were some tears in the corner of your eyes that you refused to shed. You wouldn’t give your
mother that opportunity. So you just grabbed your backpack, slung it over your shoulder, and left.

They would tell the neighbors you have decided to leave home. That you wanted independence.
Anything that didn’t involve a gay daughter and their reputation for sure.

That’s why you were walking.

Because you had nowhere to go. They weren’t wrong on some points they threw at you, like about
you never hanging out with church people. You’ve never had a lot of friends, people always
avoided you for some reason. As if there was a small danger sign hidden under your hair that only
others could see.

You thought about your grandmother’s house, but your mother had probably already called her.
And she was even worse than your mother when the L word was mentioned.
The night was falling and your tears began to fall as well.

You sit on a dead-end street, under the shade of a tree, you remember there used to be a building
here that was destroyed many years ago, even the rubble is gone. You pull the heavy backpack off
your back. A heavy breath. And then you bury your face in your hands. You didn’t have a job. You
had no money. You would end up being homeless. You were already homeless if you were honest
with yourself.

A single night. A single kiss.

And it was all gone, just like sand running through your fingers.

You want to throw up at the realization.

It’s over.

There is no family. You have no idea how you’re going to get back to college with no money. You
don’t even have a place to sleep.

You want to scream. So bad. It’s not fair. You didn’t do anything wrong. You had great grades in
high school, your parents were barely paying for your tuition because of the scholarship. You went
to church every sunday. You dressed the way your mother told you to. You followed what was
right for them.

It wasn’t your fault.

So why do you feel it is?

Why do you wish now that you weren’t born that way?

There is no way back. Maybe that’s what scares you the most.

You caused this. You and that fucking feeling.

It’s your fault. Your responsibility.

Perhaps if you repeat this a few more times you will be able to stop this feeling inside you. The
disgust that bubbles under your skin. This rage so overwhelming it threatens to snap your fingers in
half. Because it was her. It wasn’t you.

It was your mother who took you out of the house. She was the one who put your things in a
backpack. She was the one who threw you into the street like a piece of nothing.

There’s nothing wrong with you. There’s something wrong with her. And with that man who said
he loved you but didn’t get up for a moment to stop her.

She can go on talking about God’s love. She can choke on her words if she wants to. That’s not
love.

Condemning a child to live on the street is not love.

It’s just cruel.

You don’t notice when you shout. Throwing your backpack against the tree behind you.

There is a low sound of something hitting a solid surface. You sigh and rub your eyes hard.
Removing the remnants of tears.

You weren’t going to cry. Not for them.

You needed to think. You needed to think about what to do.

But then…There was a very strange sound, very alike to something breaking. You turned around
wondering if you had broken your laptop but what stared back at you was that tree. That tree that
looked so strange now, an unusual color, an unusual twist. You frown but don’t have time to think
about what it means before an incredibly strong flash blinds you for a moment.
You stand up in surprise and cover your eyes. A “what the hell” coming out of your mouth.

There is a voice. You sure heard a voice. A soft, cheerful giggle that was soon lost in all your
confusion.

And then absolutely out of nowhere.

You were falling. Falling down.

In an awkward position. How to fall forward and not backward. You opened your eyes, but
everything was too dark for you to identify anything.

You thought it could be a dream. A weird sleep you didn’t see when you fell. You were exhausted
and slept on some park bench. There is a twist in your own body. And then you hit your face on the
floor so hard you don’t know how you didn’t swallow your teeth.

There was another tree like that now. Right next to your head. Perfectly put. But when you stand
up, gripping the strap of your backpack tightly.

You are no longer in that street.

The place. It wasn’t human. That was the first thing you thought. It just didn’t look human
because… If there was such a strange landscape on earth it would be in every geography book. The
sky was yellowish, the trees reddish. There were bones the size of buildings sticking out of the
ground.

Your next thought is that you’ve finally lost your mind.

But how could you have gone crazy if the ground was so firm under you and you were breathing
and you had so great pain in your right cheek it felt like you had been punched?

So this wasn’t a dream. And you weren’t crazy.

A different world. It’s not like you didn’t think there were other worlds. You loved reading science
and fiction books behind your mother’s back. But falling into one… That was definitely not in your
plans.

Terror starts pumping through your veins.

You were good at analyzing situations without panicking. You were a very dedicated scout.

Your cellphone was out of coverage area. Obviously.

You didn’t have water so that was the first thing you looked for.

It didn’t rain in the past few days, but you found a river not far from the tree where you woke up, it
was drinkable as it came down from an ice-covered mountain and the strange animals, like hybrids
of the animals you knew, drank in it. They weren’t bothered by your presence. You could live
some time with water and the chocolate bars you had in your backpack.

But after the second day, you knew you had to get help. Because that was your last Snickers bar.

You’ve never missed the hideous meatloaf your mother used to make.

Oh this certainly wasn’t your world and you needed to get back anywhere where there weren’t
spider squirrels sleeping in the trees where you sought shelter.

There was a city on the horizon. Between the bones and the yellowish sky, but you felt your
stomach churn even more just thinking about what you’d find there based on the things you’d
already seen. This world was not the friendliest. These strange creatures that not even the horror
books you liked to read seemed to have imagined… It made you unstable.

But if you didn’t eat soon. You would starve to death. What would be even worse than dying eaten
by something.
On the third day, you decided to act.

Of all the reasons you thought could screw up your cover, the ears had been the last. But in this
world. In this world, people have pointy ears, like the Lord of the Rings’ elves, large and pointy.
You wish you had known this before entering the market, but you were so hungry.

You tucked your head deeper into the collar of the sweatshirt you were wearing. You had a few
dollars in your jeans pocket, but based on what you saw it wasn’t the currency these…creatures
used. There were many of them. Of different species. Some even resembled humans so you
blended in relatively well.

You weren’t good at stealing and you had no idea what to steal because you had no idea if you
could eat any of those fruits or anything that smelled relatively good.

However you understood it was a good sign when your stomach growled near a berry stand. They
looked like the your world’s apples. The owner didn’t seem to be around. It was the perfect
opportunity.

You hope the creatures around you aren’t quite paying attention to you before you reach out and
pick up a foreign apple.

Still before you can even pull it you feel a stab of fire that runs all the way up to your palm to your
arm, the pain is so intense it makes you drop the apple, your eyes filling with tears as you notice
the burn spreading. You must have made some sound because now the creatures are looking at
you.

Something pulls back your hoodie, something invisible. But something you can feel the presence
of. It’s powerful, exudes danger and sniffles right behind your ear. You shudder as more tears
gather around your eyes.

“What pretty ears you have…Human.” The thing hisses against your skin. You swallow hard. That
was a shitty idea.

In all the ways you thought you were going to die.

That was it.

The other creatures are muttering among themselves. The word ear and human being hissed from
mouth to mouth.

“I’m-I’m sorry I…I didn’t mean to…” You try, even if you feel it’s useless. Whatever is around
you knows. It knows your intentions. It knows you tried to steal.

“Oh, my dear human…Don’t be sorry. I hate when my meat tastes like guilt.” Your eyes widen
when you feel what appears to be an invisible claw running down the back of your neck. Your
instinct is to run but an extremely heavy hand with sharp claws holds you around the waist hard
enough to break. Your hair stands up all at once. The thing huffs playfully close to your cheek and
then you feel…teeth. Pointy. Rubbing your skin. It was like that.

This is how you would die.

Pathetic. You didn’t even get a chance to write a will to leave your 50 bucks to the beggars.

“Belial, let the girl go. She dropped her snail.” The voice sounds behind you, but you can’t turn
around curiously to see to whom belonged with that mass behind you. You have no idea what a
snail is. But the thing’s grip gets tougher.

“Mind your own business, witch.” Witch. The voice sounds like steel, and hot as poison, pieces of
glass bathed in something grotesque, scratches your back and you just want to make sure you’re
still breathing.

Your heart is beating so hard now you can feel it in your ears.

“Demons always keep their agreements, right? Or do they always eat the customers when it suits
them?” A demon. You wish you could talk to your mother right now. She said at some point you
would burn in hell… Well, mommy…Wish granted. The creatures are muttering again, and you
can almost feel the rage of the thing that holds you. The way it seems to be holding itself back
from simply slitting your throat with its teeth.

“You’ll pay me for this, you disgusting witch.” He says this with a very well-placed threat. The
claws start leaving you, slowly…So damn slow. When it really lets you go you drop to your knees.
There are tears in your eyes, warm tears, perhaps from the pain of the burn, perhaps from
humiliation, perhaps from fear. For fuck’s sake you almost wet yourself.
You notice that there is a small golden coin on the ground that disappears when you look at it
again. The apple drops to your side, rolling to touch your leg.

You are no longer hungry. You surely think you might throw up.

“Hey.” The leap you take away from the person is not surprising. Your heart races again at the
possibility of something else wanting to eat your ears and only when you’re a few steps away you
allow yourself to focus for a few seconds.

It’s a woman.

A woman with pointy ears and heterochromatic eyes.

Her hair is jet black, long and dark, if not for a single white streak running through it, and her skin
is so white it seems to reflect the sun from that strange place. She also wears a skirt almost as dark
as her hair and a shirt with a low battery symbol, which would have been comical in another
situation. She looks like an earth woman in her 30s, thin, white and with cheeks as sharp as knives.
If not for her ears you would mistake her for a human.

She has an expression that you can’t quite understand, she seems resigned but at the same time
tempted to get closer.

“I don’t think everyone is as lucky as Luz was.” You frown and the woman ignores your gesture as
she takes the apple and holds it out to you. “It’s not the best fruit around here, but it’s edible for
humans.” Your eyes go from the fruit to the woman to her ears.

That’s what gave you away. The round ears.

Of all the things you’ve imagined. The ears were what almost killed you.

“I’m Lilith.” You almost say your name. A reflection you can barely contain. But you have no idea
who this woman is and all the stories you’ve heard about witches… Usually they fed and then ate.
Your mother’s voice resonates in your head again. Quoting some religious shit about Adam’s first
wife that you can’t get out of your head.

Lilith doesn’t seem offended by your silence in any way. She gets up and dusts off her clothes.

Oh she’s tall. She must be at least 6 feet tall and you feel overwhelmed. You were no more than 5'5
and you were on your knees. On the floor.

“I won’t say you should trust me… But I can assure you, I am the last thing you need to fear in
these lands.” Your stomach growls. You tell yourself that’s just why you take the apple out of her
hand and not because her eyes looked so…Oddly inviting. As if she thought you were a little bird
she needed to take care of. Now that you really look at her. She leans on a staff, white and with a
white raven carving on top.

It was beautiful.

“I’m Y/N.” Lilith looks down at you and you can swear there’s a small smile in the corner of her
black-painted lips as you bite the fruit. It tastes like watermelon. Strange but still yummy.

“If you come with me, Y/N…I believe I can get you a nice dinner and a decent bed. What do you
think?” You look up at her. Maybe the dirt on your clothes told her you had been sleeping on the
floor for 3 days.

You look at this strange woman who saved your life from a demon and who now offered you
more. A lot for a stranger who didn’t know anything about you.

“I have no money.” It’s your answer. Biting into the juicy fruit once more. It felt different
somehow, your stomach was filling up a lot faster.

“Have I demanded any?” She raises an eyebrow, slightly in true confusion.

What are her intentions? Kindness? Pity? Eat you later? You can’t tell and you desperately want to
have a little sense and not accept so much from a stranger. That’s how horror stories started. That’s
how people died.
But you haven’t slept in 3 days. You haven’t eaten anything but chocolate for 3 days.

That’s why when Lilith gestures for you to follow her with her staff, you do as she commands.

“Where are you going to take me?” You can’t help but question as you throw the fruit kernel into a
trash can.

The trash can ate the kernel.

It ate.

“My sister’s house.” She says calmly as she walks with a posture you wouldn’t have in a thousand
years. There’s a short pause as she stares at the sun and the way the city’s streets stretch into a
swamp. You can’t take your eyes off her and it should make you ashamed if this day could be
considered ordinary. But nothing in that day was ordinary so you don’t mind staring at her as you
walk. The light that lowers in the sky reflects in her eyes, one is green like an emerald and the other
is gray, it makes you think of a storm. “Home.” She corrected then, almost testing the word on her
tongue. You raise your eyebrows slightly. “The owl house.” You frown, but just follow her when
she leads the way.

At least it didn’t sound like the name of a house made of candy.

You thought it was safe enough.

 Chapter 2
Chapter Notes

I can't stop thinking about how Lilith would be different from what she is in this
beginning of season 2 so here we are

The Owl House was a residence with at least 3 floors in the middle of a clearing. Lilith didn't mind
walking all the way, but you were already panting when the weathercock finally appeared through
the trees. You used to be the kind of teen who only exercised in rare situations, you realize that it
was probably a mistake now.

"We have a quite...Noisy house. Try not to freak out about it." You would have frowned and asked
what she meant by that, but before you could open your mouth a bird's face appeared before you.
The surprise was massive enough for you to fall on your butt, eyes wide as your heart seemed to
rise into your throat for the third or fourth time that day.

"Who's your friend, Lulu?" The bird that did not have a body but a tube connected to its head
spoke. That. This was the culmination of the strange things you had already seen. A bird. A tube
bird...Speaking.

The collapse wants to scratch under your skin.

"She's a human friend, just like Luz. Her name is Y/N but don't follow her around, okay? She's still
getting used to everything." There's a little giggle in Lilith's voice that says she's having too much
fun with someone being all agitated with this creature. The bird nods excitedly as you get up.
"Now why don't you go and let Luz know we have a guest, Hootsifer?" She caresses just below the
bird's beak and it leaves with a "hoot" that you understand as cheerful.

"Is his name Lucifer?" You know there are many more important things to ask, but still.

"His name is Hooty. But I call him Hootsifer because..." She looks at you and you can swear
there's a small blush spreading across her ears, it's pretty evident considering her ears stick out of
her hair. It takes everything in you not to raise an eyebrow.

"Lilith and Hootsifer. Sounds cool." It's the witch's turn to frown slightly in your direction, you
have no idea what she's thinking about but then, just for a moment she smiles, just out of the corner
of her mouth. It's just a small smile, but it's contagious somehow because you feel the corner of
your mouth twitch. This is quite unusual.

And again before you can ask one of the thousands of questions that are in her head, a scream
interrupts your thinking.

"¿UN HUMANO?" Your eyes go to the house just in time for a girl with brown hair and wide
smile to walk out the door excitedly. "HOLA, AMIGA!" She is waving and smiling and jumping
from one foot to the other. You look at Lilith again and she just motions for you to go ahead.

You do as she commands. Because you don't see other options.

(...)
Luz was a human, just like you. She had come to this world through a portal that (oh how
wonderful) was destroyed in a battle, she said it so fast you could barely catch it.

She is cheerful, luminous, the kind of person you would have loved to have around when you were
her age. And she's kind too. She took you by the hand and sat you on the living room sofa, asking
you not to freak out because this world could be too scary the first time around. You thought she
had a point, still, that owl design on the ceiling, covered in a light you'd never seen, was also
incredibly beautiful.

A golden owl that glowed, pulsed as if alive. The owl house. The name never felt so right.

"Eda! Lilith found another human." The girl ran into the house again, returning a second later with
a woman. Paperwhite skin, white hair, pointy ears, wearing a red dress with heels, and if the shape
of her face didn't say enough... She had one amber eye and the other gray.

Sisters.

Your eyes go from her to Lilith almost at the same moment and then you lower your head. It wasn't
right to stare at the lady of the house.

That was something your mother would say. It would take you a while to stop following this kind
of ridiculous mental rule.

"How did you end up here, kid?" She doesn't seem aggressive when she asks this question. Not at
all actually. She sits on the other sofa, her brows furrowed in genuine curiosity rather than
accusation.

"A tree. I guess." She frowns even more and looks at Lilith. Luz is still bouncing from one foot to
the other behind the couch.

"Portals to these lands don't come out of nowhere." She flexes her jaw as she looks at you as if
analyzing you as if trying to see some kind of danger under your skin. You have to avoid the urge
to roll your eyes.

It's kind of ironic that she thought you could be dangerous. You.

"She's not a witch, Edalyn. If she were she wouldn't have nearly been eaten alive by a demon in the
market." Your eyes go to Lilith again. She's got her arms crossed now, you think it's to prove a
point. You hadn't noticed it before, but she has pretty long hands, with black-painted nails.

"Did someone say demon?" A small…(talking?) cat jumped to your side. That should have scared
the life out of you but after the bird, at the door, you believed nothing could be weirder. The little
animal appeared to have a skull fused to its head and had the loveliest eyes you've ever seen, a very
interesting mix of purple and yellow. "As king of demons, I can make the best contribution." You
resisted the urge to scratch the back of the pet's neck. It reminded you of the cat you had when you
were a kid. Sir Arthur.

"Well, in that case, how many days have you been in our world?" You force yourself back to the
white-haired woman. Her eyes sparkle with curiosity.

"3 nights, it's my fourth day." You could have sworn her eye glowed gold with realization.

"You came here on Samhain." You've heard that word. Somewhere. In some book. But now it
seems to float around in your head and doesn't make a lot of sense. Maybe it's mental fatigue. You
aren't sure.

"It was a pretty nice day. We had a party at school and burned blessed pieces of wood logs for
good omens on the next year." Luz said and Eda smiled in a very motherly way at her before
turning to you.

“You humans know it as Halloween. It's basically the day when the veil between our world and
your world is much thinner, much more penetrable from both sides. Even though it would be
necessary a great amount of magic to bring a whole human here." You try not to get too attached to
the word "whole" the image of just your underside coming into this world was too disturbing.

The little demon cat looked very bored with the conversation and curled up next to you. His head
resting on your thigh.

"Did you go to any Halloween party?" The girl added then, looking at you expectantly.

If you were honest. You didn't even remember it was Halloween. You knew the bomb was about
to go off at home so you didn't have time to think about what day it was and what the implications
of that were.

"No, I didn't. I'm sorry." Luz wasn't disappointed though she just smiled at you in a way that... In a
way that made you feel comfortable in your own skin for maybe the first time in a long time. She's
really that kind of gentle.

"Do you think Belos might have something to do with it?" It was Lilith's turn to ask, Eda's eyes
were still on you when she shook her head.

"I don't see what interest the emperor would have in bringing a human into the isles. But we cannot
dismiss the idea that it was one of his attempts to try to enter the human world." You want to ask
who Emperor Belos is and why the hell he wanted to go to Earth. But your head was already
burning with so much information. So you just get each one of them. Trying not to freak out with
each new cognitive explosion. Which was already a pretty big challenge.

"So…Can we stay with her?" You would have smiled at how Luz asked the question. Sounded like
Lilith, as if you were a puppy they found and had to take care of. Which, before your situation, you
couldn't deny was somewhat true.

"She is a conscious person, Luz." Eda corrected, but also with that motherly smile, you feel that
kind of reprimand was quite common. The smooth type. No slaps. No screaming. Just a
conversation. Edalyn's eyes flick to you and she inclines her head gently before speaking again.
"You stay if you want. But I can assure you that if you want to go home, no other witch on the
boiling isles is more interested in finding a portal to the human world than I am." You would have
to understand this later. All the story that surrounded Luz, Eda, the destroyed portal. Because the
Earth was your home, not this strange world where demons nearly killed customers in broad
daylight.

But now you just nod your head. You feel like it's never been heavier.

"YeY! Weirdos stick together. That's it chica, c'mon you can have the room right beside mine. Like
it's not a big room but you'll be near and I can show you around." Luz took you by the hand and
practically dragged you across the room talking too fast for your aching head to get used to. "And I
can teach you magic. I'm teaching Lilith and Eda because they've lost their powers and they're
doing really well, as you're human I think you'll catch on much faster and..." You stop for a
moment. Turning around before Luz drags you through the arch of the room.
Your mother taught you a lot of useless things that you didn't agree with. But gratitude was
something you could use now.

"What can I do for you? For letting me stay?" Eda frowned until her eyebrows almost came
together and Lilith opened and closed her mouth as if she didn't know what to say. Even the demon
cat opened its eyes and stared at you doubtfully.

"Hm…don't worry about it right now. I really appreciate having another adult in this house." Lilith
glared at Eda in accusation and you raised your eyebrows as the other woman growled in her
sister's direction.

"Just rest, kid. You will surely find your place in this strange family." Family.

It's a weird word that echoes in your head as Luz pulls you around the second floor of the house
talking about more things you could hold back.

"I've never taken you for a magpie, Lily." Eda's voice sounded even as you stepped on the bottom
step of the stairs. It even sounded over Luz's voice. You have no idea what a magpie is, but from
the laughter that echoed through the house on the next moment, you understood Eda was bullying
her sister.

You didn't have siblings, you couldn't have known the feeling. But you saved the word to search
later.

For some reason.

(...)

You lay down on the mattress Luz found for you in the back of the upstairs hallway closet. It sure
wasn't the best bed you'd ever had, but it was better than the floor you'd slept in for the past three
days. Plus you're clean and smelling like mint thanks to the soap in the bathroom.

And your belly is full. After a rather eccentric dinner, to say the least.

The owl house had a total of 5 residents and they were the most eccentric family you've ever seen.

Luz Noceda. The human girl who fell into this world through a witch's portal and didn't want to
leave because she felt that this was her place. The most adorable girl you've ever met. She
resembled you at her age, the dilemma is that you couldn't be like her.

Luz was a free bird. You were a bird whose wings were constantly clipped, always trying to fly
with what was left. Depressing.

Hooty. The Owl House itself. He...you don't know exactly what he is. But he seems kind, a little
too outgoing to try to make new friends (he almost made you have a heart attack while changing as
he appeared in the bathroom window out of nowhere) but overall a good bird, he protected the
house so Luz said.

King. The cat demon. King was the king of demons. Or so he said. He has a great fascination for
power and is also usually quite kind, cute to tell the truth. Like a pet with a craze for grandeur.

Eda Clawthorne. The owl lady as her wanted poster warned. She hung it on the living room wall,
along with a Luz banned poster. They were proud to be misfits. You thought you could handle that
pretty well. The owl lady is sarcastic, cheerful, and quite goofy, like a teenager. She was fun and
even though you were still out of orbit you couldn't help but duck your head to laugh at her jokes
around Lilith, her older sister.

Lastly. Lilith Clawthorne. The woman who saved you. Also, the hardest woman to read you've
ever met. If the others exposed their emotions and thoughts so easily and were so open about who
they were and how they acted. Lilith looked like a brick wall. She smiled at the corner of her lips
at some jokes, she watched everyone with interest as they spoke but her eyes seemed miles away.
She seemed the farthest away at the dinner table, even though Eda tried to bring her as close as
possible. There was something there.

There was something incredibly heavy, like pure iron resting around that witch.

There's something you don't understand.

You don't know why it bothers you so much. That coldness so evident in the face of the heat that
everyone else exhaled so easily. You barely know her, but it bothers you for some reason, it
scratches under your skin for some reason.

Maybe it's because she saved you. You owe her a debt now, one you're not sure you'll ever be able
to repay, so maybe that's why you at least want to understand her motives. Or maybe it's just your
obsession with analyzing characters sounding louder than you could stop it. It wasn't by chance
that you decided to go to Literature College.

After dinner, you helped Luz wash the dishes. She was still asking a million questions you didn't
have answers to. Like "what did the portal you passed through look like?" "Was there a witch
nearby?" “Have they released the fourth season of Stranger Things?”, that one did you know and,
unfortunately, you went to a world without wi-fi and without netflix. She talked a lot but it didn't
really bother you, you liked her energy and you could make the most of it once your head stopped
hurting so much.

"Bed, you two." That's what Eda said as soon as you put the last dish on the dish drainer. She
pointed to the stairs and Luz saluted before grabbing your hand again. You were tempted to say
you were too old for a curfew, but you honestly didn't find the will within yourself to object. You
were exhausted and were secretly thanking the owl lady for sending you to bed.

You went up the stairs with Luz again, but not before you saw Lilith open the door to wish Hooty
good night.

You wonder why on earth the only person she really has any kind of common bond with is a bird
trapped in a door.

And now you wonder why the hell you are thinking about this woman instead of sleeping. It's late.
You need sleep because you haven't slept well for three days.

It must be post-stress tension. You're restless, you can't keep under the blankets without feeling
suffocated. You feel that demon's claw sliding down the back of your neck again, you shiver
remembering the cold, the voice like poison and boiling steel, the threat, and yet if that wasn't
enough you relive every word before falling into that portal. How ironic it was that those words
made your body feel worse than remembering the claws of a demon.

"Freak" "Whore".

And then that pair of eyes. A green one. A gray one. Staring at you, trying to help.

How could she have such a sharp demeanor around everyone and still be the one who saved you?
Why did she care?
That's why you get up. You seek in the dark for your cell phone and turn on the flashlight so you
can see the corners of your room. It was a small room that Eda had probably used as an arsenal
before. There were a few weapons still displayed on the walls, but they didn't look sharp. The floor
was covered in soft fabric and there were weights in some corners. Maybe an old gym.

You approached the window and opened it. The frosty night air hits your face and you almost sigh
in relief. That's nice. This looks enough like Earth to settle your mind. Your eyes close for a brief
moment and just for a second, it's like you're in your bedroom, on the second floor, with the
window to the backyard where your swing set still stood. Dad never got rid of it, even if you
haven't swung on it in over 10 years.

He was a good father, he only failed the one time you really needed him, but he was a good father.

You sit on the jamb and look up to the stars that shine in the sky above. The only issue... is that
there are no stars.

Just little balls of light, you can see it in almost the same second. They are small, incandescent
balls that glow a few hundred yards away, some even seem to float closer, you think you can touch
one if you climb to the top of the house, but the prospect of breaking your neck it's not very
welcoming. However, it is certainly not the gas balls thousands of kilometers away that graced the
solar system where the earth was.

This was a very strange world...Bizarre to say the least. But... Beautiful too. Somehow... A morbid
beauty perhaps.

"Y/N." Hooty's voice hummed your name and you widened your eyes, your heart pounding. You
jump away from the window in the same second, instinct making you act faster as it has been
happening over and over again these days. "I can feel you have the window open, are you okay?"
You ran to close the window and then crawled back into your mattress, determined not to get out
until the sun came out.

(...)

You woke up with the slight morning light in your eyes. You slept like a rock, which was no
wonder. Voices sounding through the hallways of the house, so you're sure there are people awake
before you get up from your mattress.

You go down the stairs, trying your hardest not to make too much noise because you had no idea if
people were still sleeping. The living room is empty, but the owl-shaped symbol glows from the
ceiling, pulsates. Noises are coming from the kitchen, so you head there.

Edalyn is rummaging through the fridge for something. Lilith is sitting at the table, a mug between
her fingers that says “Bad Girl Coven” and she seems to have the day's paper in her other hand. Her
back didn't touch the chair, but her posture was perfect as if she had an invisible ruler that held her
spine in place.

"Good Morning." Your voice sounds hideous, a little groggy from sleep yet. Lilith's eyes almost
immediately go to you, staring at you for a brief second before she goes back to the paper, no
response.

"Good morning, Y/N." Eda mutters while still rummaging through the fridge. "There's cereal on
the top shelf of the cupboard and do you like milk or do you eat it without anything like Luz?" She
turns to you with a bottle of red liquid in it and she pours it into another mug similar to Lilith's.
"Hm, I'm lactose intolerant, so I think no milk is fine." Eda got Count Chocola for you. Ironically,
or maybe not, it was one of your favorites on earth.

"GOOD MORNING." The excited voice made you look back to receive Luz with a small smile.
She already looked ready for the day, completely excited. Eda ruffled her hair affectionately as she
walked into the living room. You hear the front door open and a sleepy “hoot” from Hooty as Eda
walks out. "So human friend, what are you going to do all day?" Luz asked as she pulled the cereal
box closer and poured some into her bowl.

As a matter of fact, you had no idea.

"What do you do on your days off from school?" Luz opens and closes her mouth for a moment,
thinking.

“I hang out with my friends, Willow, Gus, and Amity. We always find something to do, or I write
fanfics or draw anime characters. I read a lot too, you can't be a good fanfic writer if you don't read
a lot.” You try to control your smile, but you can't quite manage it and ends up slipping away for a
moment.

"Well...you seem to have a pretty busy life." Luz lets out a laugh as she shakes her head.

"I'll be waiting for you outside, teacher." You're not surprised when Lilith speaks, much less when
she gets up. You were well aware of her presence you didn't see how you couldn't be well aware of
her presence.

"Teacher?" You ask then, your brows furrowed in doubt.

"Oh yes, I'm teaching Eda and Lilith glyph magic because they lost the magic in the same battle
we lost the portal." There is something. There's something there. Something under your skin
scratches to find out more, why they lost their magic, and how that was possible. But even from the
back, you feel an overly sharp look directed at you, one that makes all the hairs on the back of your
neck stand up, even though you can't even see it. The iron wall feels even firmer now.

You shouldn't ask. So you didn't.

"Do you think you can arrange me some books?" Luz's eyes sparkled when you asked that
question, you would say with such excitement that it seemed to come out of her pores.

"I surely can." She practically stuffed the rest of the breakfast in her mouth, barely chewing it
before dashing out into the backyard in her colorful witch school uniform. You were smiling when
you got up from the table to go outside.

"Good morning, Y/N." It didn't scare you like before, you'd have to get used to that little face stuck
in the door at some point.

"Good morning, Hooty." You think he widened his eyes and opened his beak in excitement.

"Nobody ever says good nothing to me besides Lulu." He spins his head happily and although it's a
little weird you think it's quite adorable. "I bet we will be a trio of best friends by now. Three is
always better." You just chuckled at Hooty, he was too innocent to notice how things were going.
The bird just blinked his eyes several times, which you took to be a friendly gesture.

"Do you think you're ready to create bigger things?" Luz asked. You frowned as you leaned against
the doorframe, watching as Lilith and Edalyn stood with staffs in hand. Eda had a staff with an owl
on top, quite similar to Lilith's, but it was brown.
"I think we can try a combination of larger proportions, then we can think about how to transfer
that to paper." explained Eda. Luz nodded for them to proceed.

Your eyes followed as the two witch sisters drew wide circles on the ground with the tips of their
staffs. You had no idea what they meant, but they were connected to each other and formed a
pattern.

"Ready Lily?" Edalyn asked as she found herself beside her sister. Lilith responded with a small
smile that could mean yes or no. However, she did the same as her sister and without further verbal
exchange between them, they touched their hands to the ground.

The circles made in the earth ascended in gold as the symbol of the living room itself. But it wasn't
just that. A golden owl left the spot where Edalyn was touching her hand to the ground, filling with
fire and expanding. In the same way, a raven the size of the house itself emerged from the symbol
of Lilith, spreading its wings and glowing blue.

This was magic. You weren't terrified. You were delighted.

"Guys, this is so damn awesome!" Luz exclaimed as Eda's owl dissolved into golden fire and
Lilith's raven into blue flames. You don't remember the last time something impressed you so
much. Maybe your first Fourth of July as a kid, or maybe your New Year at the beach when you
were 17. Nothing compares to that. Nothing compares to this frenzy you get to see that power, to
feel that power in the air, you feel all your hairs are up and your heart is surely sounding in your
ears. Impressive. "You guys are doing great, keep practicing as much as you can, I'll try to get
home early today so we can go over the last combinations you've been making." Luz had that kind
of excitement that made you believe that even in a completely different world, in a life that wasn't
yours, there would still be room for optimism.

"I'll give you a ride, kiddo." Eda threw up her staff and the owl at the tip spread its wings, to
simply float. Who needs brooms, right? Luz waved at you as she sat beside the witch and then they
were gone, disappearing into the sky that showed the first brightest rays of sunlight.

Lilith cleaned her staff before starting to walk into the house. You expected her to say at least a
"hi", but she passed directly beside you, her arm rubbing yours just for a moment.

Harsh and firm as steel.

She smelled like something refreshing. Pine, lemon with a sweet touch.

Not a word to you but she didn't look at Hooty either.

You shrugged. She wasn't obligated to be your friend just because she saved your life.

Still, you hated being ignored.

That's why you roll your eyes before entering the house again, having no idea what to do to occupy
your own head.

Try being friends with Lilith was cut from your list. Hooty would have to wait to have a trio of best
friends.
 Chapter 3
Chapter Notes

I'm just overwhelmed with new Lilith's content

There was an established routine at the Owl House and after 3 days, you could say you got used to
and adapted perfectly to it. Perhaps that was why the human race had lasted so long, they were
easily adaptable. You got involved around these misfits, criminals, and strangers incredibly
effortlessly, and now that you think about it...It happened because you were considerably similar to
them. You didn't have a place at home either.

Weirdos stick together? That was what Luz said, wasn't it? You think you started to understand
what that meant.

During the morning and part of the afternoon Luz went to Hexide, a school for magic folk, Lilith
and Eda studied glyph magic. Meanwhile, you read. Back on earth, you didn't have many friends,
you didn't have a lot of people to talk to, while the girls in your class hung out with boys or friends,
you read. You've always read more books than would be healthy for anyone and after your
pleading request, Luz started smuggling some for you. Of all kinds. Ranging from the ones she
used in school to witches' literature, fantasy that witches wrote about humans to very interesting
tragedies that you believe inspired some of Shakespeare's plays. You've been reading most of the
time, that's how you were gradually getting used to this world, with its stories, with everything that
surrounded you. It was what kept your sanity in place as well if you were being honest with
yourself.

You've never known what King did during the day. Occasionally He curled around your feet while
you read, sometimes he would just disappear. Certainly like a cat.

Lilith and Eda didn't normally stop for lunch, so you ate alone in the kitchen while they practiced
magic outside. It was the time of the day when you could stop and watch them without looking
awkward. It was…impressive to say the least.

You had already identified some types of spells. Spells of fire, ice, light, some linked to nature.
Lilith was especially good at those connected with confusion, with illusion, the ones that left a
glowing blue mist when she manipulated them, creating imaginary crows the size of buildings.
Magic was still extremely abstract for you. Your mind still hadn't decided how to feel about it, but
you had to admit it was just beautiful watching the Clawthorne sisters perform complex spells in
the backyard of the house.

You still don't know which kind of spell Eda is better, probably the ones linked to fire. You are not
sure.

When Luz returns home, she checks witch sisters' work and then gets to do her homework. As you
have a lot of free time, you don't mind reading her books, you've always been a nerd in high school,
and helping Luz is a pleasure for you. It's something to do.

You all have dinner together and then there's free time in the living room. Usually, Luz, Eda, and
King play games. You and Lilith read.
You don't know if she's already noticed that Luz has been smuggling books for you every day, but
she doesn't seem exactly interested in what you're reading or your existence at all. She saved your
life but doesn't seem interested in establishing any kind of friendship or even a minor connection,
just as she doesn't seem interested in getting involved in the family activities that develop around
her. She has her own world. It's what it seems like. A world of her own where she just socialized
with Hooty and had, at most, polite conversations with other people.

You have no idea why your head is so involved with it. It might just be her, she's like that. You
don't know her, so you can't say she doesn't feel right.

So why doesn't it feel exactly right?

You watch the game that Eda, Luz, and King are playing. It looks like something with cards, but a
little too complicated for you, mainly because the cards were eating each other up. A particularly
good move made Eda let out an excited squeal as she pulled chips from King for her. You
chuckled a little while shaking your head. You've never thought you'd see anything like what
you've been seeing these past few days, but it's incredibly comforting.

For some reason, it's comfort you feel sitting on the sofa in the main room at the Owl House and
you have no idea how long it's been since you felt it. You have no idea if ever... You felt it. It's
kind of ironic that among people you barely knew you felt better than in what you used to call
home.

These people...These people accepted you without even thinking twice, without questions, without
demands. Wasn't that how a family should act? Your eyes tingle, so you take a deep breath before
gripping the book tighter.

You return to your reading of the isles' history. Lilith reads about magic and history most of the
time, some books in languages you don't know, and she has impeccable focus. You often found
yourself getting lost as you read because Eda and Luz knew how to be chatty and noisy when they
wanted to, but she didn't. Maybe she was used to it already or maybe she actually was just
indifferent.

You were living in the Owl House for 3 days and Lilith Clawthorne's probable indifference was
already making something move under your skin. How Luz and Eda lived with it daily and showed
nothing but kindness and understanding?

What were you missing here? Why does nothing make sense?

You fell in the middle of a show episode, in the middle of a book chapter. You want to understand.
This lack of connection makes you uncomfortable, it's like looking at an unfinished work, a
painting that never had a chance to be finished before the painter died.

Harsh and firm as steel. This couldn't always be like this.

"Here." You've probably spent plenty of long minutes wondering because your body jumps back
when you hear a voice sounding relatively close. You hit your head against the sharp wood of the
sofa. It hurts a little, but nothing compares to the surprise of hearing Lilith speak to you for the first
time in 3 days.

She's standing in front of you, wearing a blue sweater and pants combination. It was her pajamas,
you'd noticed. It matched her eyes. You force your own head to focus on what she has said and
what she's extending to you.
It's a book. The cover is purple and the title has golden letters.

"What is this?" You can almost hear her say "a snake, can't you see?" but then she just shakes her
head negatively. You can see her rolling her eyes under her skin.

"A book." She simply says.

"Oh t-thank you." You stutter and feel the heat rising in your face incredibly fast for that. God,
you're pathetic.

Lilith offers you just that twitch of her lips again as if she knows what you mean and then she goes
back to sit in the armchair across the room, nothing happened. And perhaps for her, nothing really
happened.

You still have no idea what was really going on at the Owl House. You feel like you've been late
and missed a lot of important parts.

But you learned that night that Lilith Clawthorne could be many things.

But she wasn't indifferent.

You look at the book in your lap. “The Boiling Isles through the years, Book II”. “The Boiling
Isles through the years, book III” are the words on the cover of the one she gave you.

She... She recognized which book you were reading.

So if she's not indifferent... Not even with you... Why does she keep acting like she doesn't belong
here?

Your eyes catch her from across the room. She's back to the foreign language book. Nothing
happened. She hasn't shown the slightest gesture of sympathy with you since the day she took you
off the street. It's like nothing has actually changed.

Lilith Clawthorne...What do you hide under that skin? What could there be inside that I'm missing
that I can't understand? And why the hell does it bother my own head so considerably?

Her eyes look up at you, green glowing more than the gray one. She normally wouldn't leave her
reading for anything, but your staring session must have annoyed her. You have to bow your head.
Your cheeks are heating up again.

Something tells you that you will soon find out what is wrong here. Because apparently you
couldn't get your attention away from her.

Not for a measly second.

You've always thought those Wattpad stories about girls killing each other over guys who didn't
give a shit about them were just complete nonsense because if someone didn't care about you, you
wouldn't care about that person, and end of the story.

Well. You were wrong. Her supposed indifference intrigues you. You want to know who she is.

You want to know Lilith Clawthorne and had no idea how to start.

(...)

"So here it says that fire spells are better linked to strong emotions than others, so it's the element
of power." You nod your head as Luz traces the lines of the book with her fingertip, there's a
picture of a witch with a fireball in each hand. You reread this part to help her with her homework
that afternoon. It was quite simple, she just had to write a short summary on how different types of
spells could affect a witch's emotions. Light spells usually referred to calmer, more comforting
sensations. Those linked to aberrations could mean resilience. The illusion ones seemed to mix
frenzy and calm in balance, often the most difficult for an inexperienced witch to perform.

“There is a part at the end of the book that discusses ice spells. I don't think any of your colleagues
would have time to find it.” Because you've been looking for this for 30 minutes while Luz read
the other parts. The girl rolls her eyes in such a juvenile way you can't help but think it's funny.

“Our spell teacher is the perfect female Severus Snape example. Thank you, Y/N.” She turns the
pages to the end of the book, you point to the page and she finds it easily. There's a little section
about the ice spells that you and Luz read slowly, but there's nothing about the kind of emotion
there. The girl lets out a frustrated sigh before laying her head on the table. “Lilith. A little help
here?” Eda had gone to the market with King to buy something you didn't pay much attention to.
That's why Lilith is the only one in the living room with you, practicing glyph combinations across
the table. And even though she was completely silent, you were aware of her presence, as seemed
to be usual.

"I'm not supposed to help with your homework, Luz. That's cheating." Now you believe that you
and Luz roll your eyes in the exact same way.

"As if all the witches in her class didn't have witch parents to whom they're going to ask for help."
Lilith's eyes meet yours, one eyebrow slightly raised, she says “what an example” without needing
words as she narrows her eyes. You just raise an eyebrow in reply, shrugging.

"C’mon, Lilith, we've researched everything, you've seen it." The other witch just shook her head,
black hair bouncing and receiving different reflections in the living room light.

"Your teacher wouldn't have given you homework you couldn't do." Luz threw up her arms in
exasperation, her eyes wide almost saying "Duh?!".

"It's evident she'd be giving us homework that no one else could do, which part of her being the
female version of Severus Snape didn't you understand?" Lilith looks at you for a moment and she
doesn't really seem inclined to give you the answer. However, Luz's very pleading eyes must have
some effect, because she sighed deeply before reaching over to pick up one of the books she had
been reading.

“Ice is water, water is the element of change. The sensation is one of fluidity, connection, spirit,
and body as one.” She opens the book on a specific page before handing it to you. "But I don't
support cheating." You nod your head in thanks, which Lilith ignores. You read the page with Luz
and it's there. It was the last thing you needed for her work to be complete.

"Can you read it for me when I'm done? I really want to impress her." You just nod your head, a
small smile at the corner of your mouth. Gradually, you felt that you were taking Luz as a little
sister you never had a chance to have and you appreciated the feeling.

"You know, you should try magic." The unexpected interference of Lilith's voice makes you stop
reading whatever was written to look at her. Her eyes are still on the drawings, but you can almost
feel her attention on you.

"I beg your pardon?" Because you don't honestly understand. You weren't a witch, that was pretty
obvious, and as much as you thought it was beautiful the way people in this world did magic, you
didn't know if you wanted to learn it. Mainly because you wanted to go home and you didn't see
how it would be possible to use magic again in a world without magic. It was better to nip it in the
bud and not even want to learn. You feel Luz's eyes playing between you and Lilith, similar to a
table tennis game. She's waiting for a reply.

"If you want to get back to your world it will probably entail some chaotic battles going forward.
You can stay in this house while we're out resisting the best we can, but I have to admit help would
be welcome." You had no idea how to feel about it, but if it could help them in any way you would
definitely use your nerd brain to learn to be a witch. It was the right thing to do, right? These
people welcomed you. If you could help them in any way, you would.

"Do you want me to try doing magic?" You immediately feel Luz's eyes on you with quite youthful
excitement. She always had that kind of enthusiasm that made you feel so significant.

“YES, please! I've always wondered what another human's magic would look like and it's so cool
to do magic, you feel a tingle and…” Lilith gestures to Luz, a sign of polite silence that the girl,
incredibly, accepts.

You watch the witch draw a simple symbol on the paper, it was the fire glyph. Her fingers are long
and graceful, traversing the shape with knowledge and accuracy. She moves closer then until she
can be kneeling beside you, you don't remember her being this close since the day she found you.
Distinct eyes, skin so white, lips colored black. You can smell her perfectly now. She smells like a
forest and tulips. Fresh but sweet. And you don't remember being so aware of someone's warmth,
even close like that. You can almost feel the shadow of her touch.

"Give me your hand." She's not commanding, she's asking. Her tone of voice doesn't sound the
same as the one she uses daily to deal with everything. It's softer, you'd say almost childlike if that
could apply to Lilith Clawthorne. It's the first time you've seen her excited about something.

Your eyes stare at the glyph. Would it work? It seems a little ironic, considering your current
situation, but you had stopped believing in magic many years ago. Seeing Lilith, Eda, and Luz
doing this was like seeing a lost episode in a childhood cartoon, that's how it felt. That's how you
felt. How long have you wanted magic to be real?

But a glyph is just a piece of paper, you don't have magic, you were never special that way. The
books you used to read in hiding gave you some comfort in your teens, at 11 you thought your
Hogwarts letter would arrive. At 12 you thought maybe some satyr would show up at school to
take you to Camp Half-Blood. When you turned 18, you just begged a golden beast to break into
your house and take you to the other side of the wall. Yet that didn't happen. None of this happened
and you had to live 20 full years with people who despised who you were. You weren't special.
Magic was never real in your world, magic didn't save you. Why would it be any different now?

Lilith looks at you, hand extended. Doubt shines in her eyes. Are you afraid? Of course, you're
scared, magic is something for special people. People who meant something to the fate of the
world. Not for freaks. Not for people like you. Your mother's voice echoes in your head. There is
no magic. There are just them. There's just that moment looping in your head.

Magic won't save you again. If you touch that glyph nothing will happen. It's just a piece of paper.

You feel your lips dry and your heart beating slower and slower. Astonishing how your parents
screwed your head up on so many levels.

"Trust me. It won't hurt you.” It shouldn't hit you as hard as it did. But it hits. Because Lilith
Clawthorne, the woman made of steel who has barely looked in your direction all these days is
asking you to trust her. Just trust her, her eyes seemed to be gleaming, the shade of gray looking a
lot like a misty morning now.

When was the last time you trusted someone?

It's ridiculous because you don't remember.

And she has the most beautiful eyes you've ever seen.

You hold your tongue to the roof of your mouth to keep your eyes from watering when your fingers
rest on hers. Her hand is nothing like you imagined, not harsh and firm as steel. It's nothing like
she appears to be. It's soft and it's warm, which reminds you of a cocoon. She welcomes your
fingers and this feels like the first touch in a long time.

You had no idea how starving you were for touch until that moment. The warmth and smoothness
of the skin. A touch that wanted nothing more than to touch.

She took the glyph and extended it across your palm and then her other hand reached for your free
hand. She looks at you, just for a brief moment. But you understand what she's looking for. She's
seeking approval. If you really didn't want to do this she would stop right there. She simply
wouldn't do anything. She's comprehensive, she cares about how you feel. So why doesn't she
demonstrate it? With everyone? You just nod your head and she nods back before she makes both
your hands join.

Maybe because of the emotions you were feeling at that moment or maybe because it was your
first. But your first spell is like getting a shock but in a very pleasant way. An intense, heated shiver
runs through your hands as the fire surges from them, glowing in a soft golden light that makes you
grin from ear to ear in almost the same second. You did magic. This was magic.

And it felt right.

Nothing has ever felt so right.

The way the flames spread through your fingers without burning, the way the fire warmed your
face, the way the little chilling heat spread through your arms until it reached your heart, the way
Luz screamed and made a " you nailed it!" dance behind you, the way Lilith smirked. That small
smile, but that reached her eyes.

The first time you did magic it was like simply finding something you didn't know you had lost.
You didn't know you needed this until it happened. A puzzle piece you've been looking for. It's a
connection. It's something outstanding. It's the first time you believe you're doing something
meaningful.

"Thank you." The words leave your mouth before you can even predict and you have no idea
exactly what you're thanking for. Your ears started burning.

Lilith just nods though. Sure, that's what that gesture means. And then she walks away again. Cold
comes slowly, not suddenly. You don't used to notice these details and you try not to pay too much
attention to it because Luz is so excited and she needs to finish this homework, but as soon as Lilith
walked away you felt like the heat disappeared. Not your palms' heat, from the spell, but her heat.

Now where her body was there was just cold. You feel a little stupid for wanting her to get close
again.

Your reflexes were way better on the boiling isles. That was the only explanation for such a strange
feeling.

You focus on what you have to do, leaning in and indicating how Luz should build her text.
Introduction, development, and conclusion. However, you would lie if you said you were truly
paying attention. You weren't.

Your eyes constantly go to her. Is she pretty? Hell yeah, probably the most beautiful woman you've
ever seen with those sharp cheeks and long neck. But that's not it. She intrigues you. At the same
time that she appears to be this brick wall, something stirs inside her, something that seems
desperate to get out. Maybe she has it inside her, this softness, this care, but she has no idea how to
get it out.

You want to understand her, not just because she saved your life, or because she intrigues you.

You want to understand Lilith Clawthorne because now you're pretty sure she was the first person
you trusted completely, probably since you were 10 years old.

The last person you allowed into your bubble was your father, you told him you thought the
neighbor's daughter was beautiful. He never let you play with her again. Perhaps in his head, he
was protecting you, but that was the last time. You dodged your parents as much as you could
starting from the age of 11, especially your mother. Because, with each new year, you began to
realize that the person you were...wasn't the person they wanted.

You walked away from most people, who weren't many. You grew up with the great company of
books, the human touch being just a distant memory of something you'd rather avoid if you could.

And then. Lilith Clawthorne. She just asked to trust her. She just held out her hand.

And so you did. You didn't think what touching could mean, you didn't think she was touching
you.

You allowed it.

There's no reason, you just did it and it scares you.

Quite a lot.
 Chapter 4
Chapter Notes

I'm probably writing too much

One week of classes with Luz and you were doing incredibly well. You weren't used to drawing,
when it came to art you were better off with strings. Still, you learned to draw the glyphs as round
as possible, just as you began to learn to combine them to create different spells from those base
ones. You found out that spells involving fire glyphs were usually the easiest for you to master.
Perhaps because you had pretty intense emotions all the time. Or maybe because you appreciated
seeing the flames around your fingers. You can't tell. You just know you love the idea of looking
like Regina Mills from Once Upon a Time.

Luz was a great teacher and now you could consider yourself a witch's apprentice. You still didn't
know how to feel about it, but doing magic...Doing magic was one of the most enchanting things
you've ever done in your entire life. It's something to keep your mind and hands busy as well.

Your friendship with everyone in the house was gradually evolving. Luz enjoyed your company,
probably because she saw an older sister in you with whom she could share the difficult life of a
14-year-old, between conflicts with the part of her that loved being human and the feelings she
didn't understand about Amity. You're pretty sure they had mutual crushes but you haven't
expressed this perception yet.

You had the warmest feet in the house according to King's judgment. Hooty loved the way you
scratched right under his chin and also how you were patient enough to listen to him talking about
all the different bugs he ate during the day and how they tasted different. Eda preferred your kind
of dark and self-deprecating sense of humor, it was very similar to hers and according to her, you
were also the person with the best style for clothes in the house. Despite the fact, you believe she
just said that to make fun of the Sailor Moon t-shirt Lilith was wearing that day.

About Lilith...Well, you wouldn't say you were friends. But she says good morning to you now,
which you once considered a breakthrough.

It was a cloudy afternoon on the boiling isles that day and you were reading, as usual. This time
one of Lilith's magic books that magically appeared in the books pile of your room. It could have
been Luz, but you had a hunch it wasn't her. A hunch that always made your cheeks heat. The book
was particularly intriguing and brought some magic fundamentals in this world. Lilith made notes
all over it and her handwriting is exceptionally perfect. The type of handwriting a girl who sat at
the first desk and used colored pens for her notes would have. But you weren't complaining, she
had pretty interesting insights and the beautiful handwriting allowed you to understand what she
saw in each different chapter or paragraph.

You were about to move your feet because you were getting cramped as King was wrapped around
your ankles when Eda walked into the room absolutely suddenly.

"Can you help me to make a chocolate cake?" Your first action was to frown over the top of your
book, mostly because you didn't know if you got it right.
"I heard Luz muttering about how she missed the earth chocolate cakes." She says this with her
arms crossed behind her back as if she's trying to pretend she doesn't care a lot about it. The owl
lady would have to pretend better. You were in this house for less than 2 weeks and you were
already fully aware she would kill to keep Luz happy.

"We can try." It was your reply as you got up from the couch. Eda smiled broadly, in a way that
completely clashed with her previous attitude. Her eyes sparkled and you inwardly pushed the
thought you would have loved to have a mother like her far away.

You made a list for her with drawings on the side so she would know exactly what to buy. Luckily
for you, the ingredients for a chocolate cake were quite common on the boiling isles, due to human
food experiments among witches, and 20 minutes later the owl lady was back, ready for you to get
to work.

"What's so special about a chocolate cake?" Eda asked as you poured two fairly full tablespoons of
cocoa powder into the bowl she was holding. She has her hair tied up now which makes her eyes a
lot more evident. They look bigger than Lilith's, or maybe it was the other witch who didn't open
them up enough like her sister.

“Well, they're sweet and fluffy. Every child loves chocolate cake and every adult pretends not to.”
Edalyn frowns at this which makes you laugh as you reach for the milk carton and measure it into
the cup so you can pour it into the bowl. "Adults on earth are not quite like you, owl lady, I'm
afraid." Eda frowns a little more. "It was a compliment. Adults usually pretend they like things
they hate and hate things they love because some things have just become too childish in the face
of what society says.” The witch raises her eyebrows at you and you shrug, putting the last touch
on the batter, a pinch of salt.

"Sounds like a bunch of jerks." Your smile crept across your face as you handed the wooden spoon
to the owl lady.

“I have to agree. Circular movements." You imitate the movement with your own hand and Eda
nods with her head before starting to mix the cake batter.

You go to the oven to get a cake pan and then start to grease it with butter and flour. Eda follows
your steps with interest, she was actually memorizing each of the ingredients and each of your
moves.

She was a good mother. The real kind of good mother. The kind that tries to learn how to make
out-of-this-world goodies just to please the child.

"Luz is lucky to have you." The words just come out, float in the heated kitchen space, between
you and the owl lady. Edalyn tilts her head toward you, just enough for it to be noticeable. She
smirks then, light and delicate, the kind of smile she reserved for when Luz said something silly
that made her caress her hair.

"Thank you, kid." You truly liked Eda. She was sincere in everything she did, there were no masks,
no core to dig under her skin to discover any kind of unexternalized feeling. This is her. And you
like how she is, humorous, playful, motherly, and quite chaotic.

You find yourself thinking about how they were as kids. Was Lilith ever a little more like her
sister? A little wilder, more playful, or even more open?

It was at that moment that Luz entered pretty much like a hurricane through the living room door.
You frowned and then laughed as she tripped over her own feet to reach the kitchen while she
yelled a rather high-pitched “Eda”.

"Kiddo, if you haven't killed anyone or anyone is in danger of death, breathe." You went to help
the girl up with one hand, but Eda's wheeze made you laugh at which Luz grimaced.

“We learned about the most amazing thing today in illusion class.” She said as she sat down at the
kitchen table. You go get a glass of water and land in front of her which she thanks with a look.
The girl looked like she was about to collapse. She was panting and her hair was sticking with her
sweat.

"Was it about the vomit spell?" Luz frowned at Eda and then scowled.

“Ew, Eda. No. It was about the mating bond.” She drank the entire glass of water then, her face
finally leaving the red to go back to brown, even though sweat still glistened golden on her
forehead.

"What is that?" Your question makes Luz widen her eyes and again, it's like feeling her excitement
leave her pores. She seems like she's about to burst into a million words and you're ready to hear
every one of them.

She looks so much like Eda in personality that it's hard to believe they aren't related.

"It's like a soul mate for us. Between two individuals, males, females, different genders, different
species even." She seemed pretty excited by that last part and your mind goes straight to Amity.
"But by the way they say it sounds a lot stronger. Not like something you choose." Luz takes a
deep breath for a moment and then smirks in a way that tells you that a certain girl with green hair
is on her head 24/7. It's cute. They're pretty cute.

"It's stronger." Eda announced while she was still beating the cake. Two more minutes and you
could bake. She doesn't seem very interested in the subject, but unlike Lilith, she didn't mind
explaining. "A lot of witches die without meeting their mate. It's a unique connection in time and
space, created and guided by beings greater than us and impossible to ignore once found. It's
almost painful for most of us." You frown slightly, wondering how physically painful it could be to
ignore a simple bond.

A soul mate who wasn't chosen, so what's the point of that? Bigger beings who just knew who the
right person was? Sounds kind of ridiculous. It could just be your sense of realism sounding too
loud though.

"Have you found your mate?" The question escaped before you could predict it. You feel stupid
right away. If it was even painful to ignore that bond then it was pretty obvious that Eda hadn't
found it. Yet you didn't think before asking and feel your ears heating up in embarrassment.

Eda didn't look flustered about it in any way. She just smirked at you, like one who smiles at a
small child who has just asked a stupid question, golden fang sticking out of red-tinted lips.

"No...I haven't. And I don't even think I will. Uneven odds." You frown, even more, not wanting to
ask any other thing because you've already been The inconvenient question. Still, Eda proceeds the
same way. "Listen, kiddo. Having a mate is something extremely unique and special to have, but
the odds are minimum. We can't wait around for a mate all our lives or we're going to die without
experiencing the slightest bit of passion or love.” There's silence for a moment and you can't deny
that Edalyn is right. Who would have expected greater beings to finally guide you into the special
one? This wasn't living.
Luz nodded, she looked a little resigned now, which almost made you ruffle her hair in
consolation.

Eda wasn't wrong. But if you were at Luz age, you wish you could believe in crap like destiny,
soul mates, or mating bonds. It's just good to be silly when you're 14 and you have a crush on a
pretty girl. The disappointing reality could hit her later.

"Our teacher didn't want to explain how we know if we're mates with someone." She added then
and Eda's laugh fills the kitchen this time. You smile because Edalyn Clawthorne's laugh was one
of the most contagious you've ever heard. Luz laughs too even though she doesn't understand the
reason for and that relieves you. Even after a reality shock, Luz Noceda was still luminous and
believed. She was a believer and you would like to protect her from everything so that she stays
that way.

"I imagine they didn't." Eda muttered under a wheeze, wiping the corners of her eyes to go back to
beating the cake. "Usually you can feel your mate when they are close after recognizing the bond.
It's almost like a link connecting you, your soul with theirs. You can feel their emotions, you can
feel them in place. In the most intense mating bonds, I remember some saying they could even hear
their partner's thoughts. But for you to be sure, there must be carnal consummation to accept the
bond, kiddo." Your eyes widen and so does Luz. She doesn't blush, unlike you who feel the heat
rise incredibly quickly in your ears at the prospect of having this kind of conversation with the owl
lady.

You weren't a virgin but taking a mini sex education class with Eda Clawthorne wasn't in your
plans.

"Oh." Added Luz and you are sure she will be as red as you. But she doesn't. She just chuckles, her
eyes shining. "That would make a great fanfic." Your laugh is really loud this time, Eda giggles too
and Luz follows her. And you are three idiots laughing in the kitchen for long minutes. "Wait!"
Luz frowns as she looks at you and then sniffs the air. "Is this smell of chocolate cake?" She didn't
wait for an answer, she practically jumped out of her chair as soon as you stopped laughing and ran
to reach Eda's bowl. “Oh my Gosh! Can I lick the spoon later?” The witch widened her eyes at you
and you gave a thumbs up with your hand.

"Of course." She responded, making Luz raise her arms in a little celebration dance.

“I'm going to change. DO NOT WASH MY SPOON.” She was about to walk out the door when
she stopped. Her eyebrows furrowed slightly before she ran back again to grab Eda's waist in a hug.
Your heart warmed and softened in every way possible as you watched this little gesture. “Thanks
for that, Eda. You shouldn't have bothered." Eda placed a loud kiss on the top of Luz's head as she
couldn't move her hands.

"Don’t mention it, kiddo." She pulled away and then your eyes almost flew from your face when
she ran again, this time towards you. She doesn't ask before wrapping her arms around your torso.

This is your first sincere hug in a long time. That's why you close your eyes without even noticing.
The body heat, a little shorter than you, the thin arms around you, the soft smell of mint and sweat.
You rub her hair with a slight smile.

Comfort. You certainly think about the earth, a lot, because that was your home. But what you feel
when Luz grabs you in a hug is simply comfort. Something far from what you felt at home.

"Thank you, Y/N." She leans up to reach your ear. “I know Eda would have no idea what cocoa
powder is.” You let out a little giggle and only then does Luz go. Waving to you and the owl lady
before disappearing through the kitchen archway.

"Oven now, right?" You nodded and helped Eda to pour the cake batter into the pan and then put it
in the oven.

"40 minutes and we will have my grandmother's chocolate cake." Eda was smiling as she leaned
her hip against the table, right beside you.

"My grandmother cooked pretty poorly." You giggled at that feeling, the cake smell made your
stomach rumble a little.

(...)

"This is easily the tastiest thing I've ever eaten." King glorified your cake for maybe the third or
fourth time before stuffing another piece into his mouth. "It's so soft, so fluffy, so sweet, I could
dominate entire breeds with this flavor." Your brows furrowed at that, but Luz chuckled as she
took another bite.

Eda appreciated the taste too, even though it wasn't the kind of food a witch was used to having on
a daily basis.

“Hoot. Hoot. Delicious.” Hooty added. He was enjoying a piece placed on the window frame for
him. You had no idea where what he ate was going to, but you weren't too eager to find out.

Everyone is eating cake in the living room. Well. Everyone but one. You haven't seen Lilith since
breakfast. Luz arrived late from school and Eda was cooking so she didn't check your spells today
and that must have been the perfect excuse for Lilith to stay in her room all day.

You're not sure if you blame her. Not with the rain that started to fall outside, boiling rain, for
which Eda had to build a golden shield around the house with Luz's help and a combination of
glyphs you remembered to write down. And not with the cold that was coming from the same
weather. If it wasn't for the fireplace in the living room, you would try to hide under the blankets
as well.

“Lilith isn't coming for dinner? Or for dessert before dinner?” It was as if Luz read your thoughts,
you tilt your head to look at Eda, hoping the question was evident on your face. She purses her lips
for a moment before shrugging.

“Maybe she's tired. We've been working a lot these days.” Well, it wasn't a lie. But it wasn't a
completely truth either.

You could be a nosy brat when you wanted to. You are lucky you never have too many friends, as
you would surely get them into trouble in your various miscalculated actions. For example,
counseling Ms. Smith about how her husband was abusive and she should leave him. Or when you
kicked that guy in the balls because he stumbled over an old lady and walked away as if she was a
piece of garbage. You were a nosy brat when you didn't have your nose in a book. That's why you
cut a piece of cake and put it on a plate before getting up from the couch and heading upstairs. You
feel all the residents' eyes on your back, they're not judging, you can feel they're a little worried,
which might be considered a well-founded fear, but Eda is the only one speaking.

"Watch out with my sister! She can be a magpie." You frown at that word again, but don't ask
before getting to the stairs.

Luz's room was at the end of the corridor, right after, yours. Eda had the one in the middle and if
you weren't mistaken Lilith had the one across the hall between two junk rooms.
You wonder if this was really a good idea. If Lilith wanted to eat she could just go down stairs and
eat like she did every day. This is just another example of how you don't really control everything
you do around her. She intrigues you, you want to understand her, and you do this kind of stupid
thing trying it. If she kicked you away, literally, you couldn't even blame her.

You raise your fist and hesitate two or three times before knocking on the door.

There's no sound for a moment, which almost convinces you she could be sleeping. But you hear it
in the next second, the sound of feet hitting the floor, almost as slowly as your knock on the door.
Your heart starts beating faster as you hear footsteps approaching. What the hell would you say?
Hi Lilith, I know you've been in your room since early and that you probably don't want to talk to
anyone but I brought you a piece of human chocolate cake, smile.

God. You are pathetic.

The door opens. Extremely slow. Or maybe it's your nervousness turning everything into slow
motion.

But as soon as the door opens completely, you regret going up all the way and knocking on her
door.

God. She looked beautiful in those pajamas. The blue sweater that falls over one of her shoulders,
leaving most of her collarbones exposed, the pants loose. It fits so well with her eyes, even if it's
not the same color, it seems that the duplicity of colors further enhances the difference between her
irises.

Lilith looks truly surprised to see you there, in her bedroom door, and then really confused. Why
do you feel the heat rising and warming your ears by being right under her gaze? And why the hell
did she have to be tall enough for you to be forced to lift your head to look at her?

"May I help you?" You have to hold back the urge to moisten your dry lips with the tip of your
tongue, shifting your weight from one foot to the other as you look at her. She still looks the same,
different eyes, white streak running through her pitch-black hair. Her voice is still the same,
slightly hoarse and in a very balanced timbre. She wasn't abducted and exchanged for someone else
just because she was in her room all day.

“I…” Stuttering now would be the height of high school shame, so you force your voice to steady.
"I brought you cake." Lilith's eyebrows got even more pronounced and you could almost see “what
the hell” written on her forehead. "Eda and I made it, it's pretty good." Pretty good. Pathetic. You
are so pathetic. Why did you have to act so stupid in front of beautiful women who intrigued you?
You were old enough to know how to control this kind of impulse, right? Well apparently not, you
feel like you're a kid again.

It's Lilith's turn to moisten her lower lip with the tip of her tongue, as if she were analyzing what
you were doing. Her eyes play between the cake and your face, her eyebrows rising, her eyes
narrowing. What are your reasons?

If you were honest, you didn't even know why you came up here with a cake. Perhaps being nice
would make her open up a little more, make her finally a little more readable. Her absence bothers
you, you were so constantly aware of her presence that her absence at such ordinary times makes
something stir under your skin.

You feel like a kid. An incredibly stupid kid trying to please the teacher with an apple on the first
day of school.
"I...I'll save a piece for you...In the fridge...If you don't-don't want to eat now." You simply want to
end your shame session. It was a huge mistake to nosy and climb up here with a piece of cake.
That's why you turn your back on Lilith. Determined to go back to the living room and stick your
head in a hole for the rest of your days.

Stupidity. Complete stupidity.

Her gaze on you is completely noticeable even from behind. She's probably wondering why the
hell she even decided to help you out that day at the market. She brought a clueless to the house
that keeps chasing her around the corners. At least that's how you feel.

You take the first step and would have immediately returned from where you shouldn't have left
with abrupt steps.

However, that's the moment you hear her voice.

"Wait." She doesn't need to say it a second time. Her voice is clear, but a little hoarse, what you
think, is from sleep. You stand in place as if she had used magic, which you're pretty sure she
didn't. "Do you want to come in?" The words echo. You turn away, excessively slowly even for
your senses, and your eyebrows almost knit together in doubt. The words fall into your ears, reach
your brain, but they don't make much sense. You can't decode them very well. You lift your head
to find Lilith Clawthorne again, and you have to use everything in you not to ask what she meant.
"I...I'm just going to change and I can go down stairs with you." Well, you could go downstairs and
wait in the living room, but you weren't the one reminding her of that. Also because there was that
slight pink blush on her ears, as well as on her cheeks and you sure as hell you weren't imagining
that.

It was shame, embarrassment. Her fingers dig into the doorframe, which you take to be a nervous,
almost withdrawn gesture.

Lilith Clawthorne embarrassed was something you might as well name the loveliest thing you've
ever seen.

"Sure." The reply comes out of your mouth, but you're not sure if it was your brain sending that
command. She tilts her head toward your, lips pursed in what would be the beginning of a smile.

And then she steps away from the door and lets you in.

She heads toward a door at the back of the room, which you understands for a bathroom. The
sound indicates she has locked herself in there and then you are alone.

Lilith's bedroom is easily the brightest in the entire house. There are several lights in the ceiling
that you would imagine are mostly kept by her magic, they are charming little chandeliers that
don't allow any dark corners to form in the room. You wonder if there is a reason for this.

There is a desk just beside the door. That's where you leave the cake plate. Numerous books
stacked up there, as well as a few notebooks and several pencils, but completely organized. Just
like the bookshelf, full of books, you can't tell if they're in alphabetical order or by color. A big
chair raises next to the wide window, with a few different plants on the casement, the seat is big
enough to accommodate more than one person and the ends of the back are carved in a raven
shape, as you'd expect.

There's a wardrobe and a trunk on the other wall, but there's not much furniture beyond that. Just
large mirror hanging on the wall, nothing like the posters in Luz's room, just cream-colored
wallpaper.

Finally there is her bed. But it's not exactly a bed. It's a large surface surrounded by branches that
are tightly woven together to form a very wide circle, not a single branch out of place, which makes
the nest look much more organized than your own bed. In the center are more braided branches
and various colorful blankets on top, including one filled with stars and some pillows. She did a
great job making that place look super comfy.

If Eda is the owl lady. She is surely the raven lady.

Yet, and this is definitely what draws the most attention in the entire room, there is something
reminiscent of a crib mobile hanging over the nest's entire surface. Glittering stones and
miscellaneous objects wrap themselves in tiny silver strands to form the most brilliant and quirky
ornament you've ever seen.

And it's extraordinarily beautiful. You approach for a closer look and find some very polished
keys, some small light bulbs, pieces of glass that she has molded into octahedrons, precious stones
and even a small mirror ball that makes a small smile appear on your face.

You step back so you don't look too suspicious when she comes out of the bathroom and that's
when you see a single picture frame on the bookcase, one you hadn't noticed before, probably
because of the shiny mobile. You walk there and lean over, only for the most pathetic smile in the
world come to your mouth.

Eda's easy to identify. It's the same big, animated eyes and the same wide smile. She has apicot
orange hair and clings to the waist of another little girl slightly taller than her. You wouldn't say it
was Lilith, if it weren't for her green eyes, just like the one she had. One, because both Eda and
Lilith had ordinary eyes as children, amber and green, there were no gray eyes. Lilith's hair is wild,
wavy and the color of fire and she wears a pair of rather adorable round glasses on the tip of her
nose.

You could see that Eda and Lilith were sisters as soon as you caught sight of them, from the shape
of the face and the heterochromatic eyes. But now, looking at this photo from when they were
young, you're surprised at how much they look alike. Even the shape of the hands looks the same.

"I was 12, Eda was 10." You jump in place when Lilith appears completely out of nowhere beside
you. Your heart seems to stop in your throat for a moment and she twitches the corner of her mouth
at you before turning her eyes back to the photograph. She's wearing the same clothes from the day
she found you at the market, but without her boots, which leaves her with only one head of height
advantage.

"Yeah...I recognized Eda." Lilith then lets out a low giggle. She... She laughed. The sound is like
nothing you've ever heard. Because you don't think you ever truly heard her laugh with you. She
has an amusing, slightly mischievous giggle that makes all the hairs on the back of your head stand
up out of control.

"It's probably my fault." She picks up the frame and watches herself for a moment. Your eyes are
on her, on her straight black hair, on her glasses missing. You so want to ask why. “Two spells.
One to fix my myopia, another to make my hair look like this.” She returns the photo to its place,
arranging it in a way that you understand is important to her.

She loves Eda. There aren't many things you're sure of about Lilith, but she loves Eda. You've
already suspected that by the way she acted around her, but now just with that little gesture, you
understand she loves her. Even though they were so different and they sure had a lot of
disagreements over the years like most siblings. Which reminds you of something that is also
missing from that photo. Earrings. Eda wasn't wearing any, just like Lilith.

"Don't you like earrings?" It's not a very personal question and it's certainly not a question designed
to understand Lilith Clawthorne, but it's a start. You had to start somewhere.

"What do you mean?" Her eyes lock on your face and it's extremely hard not to feel overwhelmed
when that witch's full attention was on you, when those too-intense eyes were on you, in an empty
room a few inches away.

Your ears get a little warmer and your breathing hitches a little.

"Hmm...Eda wears earrings, Amity too, so I thought it was common among female withes as much
as it's common among female people on earth." Her brows furrow softly before she shrugs for a
moment. You suddenly realize that it might have been a little rude to ask this because it meant you
had been staring at her ears for some time.

"I have the holes." She lifts her hands to her ears, tracing her lobes with her fingertips. "But it didn't
quite match my outfit in the emperor's coven." You try not to show your surprise at actually getting
personal information. She was in the emperor's coven. She was an ally of the one everyone in this
house seemed to want to slaughter with all their might. That didn't explain much, but it was already
a path. "I should probably go back to wearing it now, there's nothing in my outfit that matches
anything anyway." You smile a little at that, remembering Eda's mockery of her clothes.

For some reason, you remember the weight of your own earrings in your ears. This was your
favorite pair, moon and star, a sapphire gem in each. It was your grandmother who gave it to you,
because you were the kind of kid who would go in the middle of the night, in the middle of the
backyard just to look at the moon. Always with your head in the clouds.

"Here." You don't ponder. You do. Your fingers reach for the earring back, the one shaped like the
moon, pulling it out easily.

Lilith's eyebrows almost join in doubt.

"What? What are you doing?" You weren't sure if there was a chance of her casting a spell on you
if you tried. But the fact that the glyph pad was on the desk gives you enough confidence to brush
aside one of the smaller hair strands that framed her face to reach her earlobe. Her hair is soft and
silky smooth.

She stays still. Completely paralyzed when you put the earring through the hole and put it back on.
Her skin feels even warmer than the last time you touched her, even though you try your best not to
brush your fingers against her any more than necessary.

"One earring for a pointy ear, one earring for a round ear." You didn't mean for your voice to come
out as a whisper, but your hands were shaking now. You could be very impulsive at times and this
was definitely one of those moments. Your ears are burning and you're pretty sure your face is a
red mess. You put an earring in Lilith's ear. Simply put an earring in her ear.

You don't want to look her in the eye because you don't know if you can face what's there, she
might have found it so weird or even extremely invasive, you had no idea. That was very stupid of
you. You should at least have asked first.

Still, when you finally look up, she's just looking at you. Ears slightly reddened and head tilted.
There is a silent question there, there is a why that echoes between the small space that separates
you two.

"It matches the gray eye." She opens her mouth as if to say something, maybe something about her
eyes, but then she closes it again. A new blush rising around her nose as she lowered her eyes. Her
ears move the same way and this is for sure the cutest thing you've ever seen.

"Thank you, Y/N." Your name sounds good in her voice, almost massaged into her tongue. When
she walks away this time the cold is instantaneous. Perhaps because you didn't even notice it was
hot again.

Your arms curl around yourself as Lilith picks up her plate of cake and sniffs it before picking up
the fork and tasting a bite.

You watch with interest and are surprised when her pupils double in size, enough for you to notice
even a few steps away.

"This is interesting." You catch your lower lip between your teeth to stop the laugh that wants to
come out of your mouth.

"I'm glad you liked it." Lilith looks at you again, she has some chocolate smearing the corner of
her mouth. She stretches her lips just enough for the beginning of another smile. Quite adorable.

"I'm only honest when it rains." And that's when you realize how screwed up you were. Because
she just needs to purse her lips a little bit so you forget about anything else you were thinking about
earlier. She just needs to nod her head the right way or say your name for your heart to start beating
a little faster and your ears getting warmer.

You wanted to know that witch and now you believe you have fallen into a path of no return.

How lucky was the human who created a crush on the most emotionally cold witch of all boiling
isles?

Well, you've never been known to be born lucky.

 Chapter 5
Chapter Notes

Kinda sad now we won't have Lilith for a while so I'm gonna write to make me feel
like she's still as active as before

Friday. You believe this is your third week at the Owl House, time was passing fast with your
newly established routine. Reading, studying magic, helping with household activities and with
Luz's homework, trying not to turn into a blushing mess every time Lilith looked at you for more
than two seconds. You had a lot to occupy your head now.

You've already learned how to do a simple illusion spell and can now produce more than one light
ball at a time. Something Luz celebrated for hours.

It was already night when your adopted little sister had gone somewhere with her friends. You
heard something about a sports game that you didn't quite understand. But they looked especially
excited so you just received her goodbye hug and watched her leave with the kids towards Hexide.

Eda was out too, personal matters, she said. No more explanation and you really wouldn't demand
more. King said she's probably gone hunting and you don't know if you want to know what that
means.

The early evening is fading through your bedroom window, the sky turning from that baby blue
and orange tone to the darker that borders on black. You can hear muffled sounds from the
kitchen, so you rub the towel over your wet hair one last time before leaving the room.

You make your way down the stairs to the living room. King's sleeping on the sofa, a very
promising sleep. A small smile tugs at your lips as you gently scratch the demon's neck. Only then
do your footsteps lead you to the kitchen.

You don't know exactly what you expected to find, but what you found is sure to surprise you.

First of all, Lilith had her hair up in a bun. You've never seen her with her hair up and she was...
More than beautiful. Her neck was free now, as were her sharp cheeks. The perfectly visible moon
earring in her right ear still makes your cheeks want to redden again.

Second of all, she seemed to be out of her own place. There were at least 3 different pots on the
stove, all over burners and she didn't seem to know what to do in any of them. She's standing there,
staring at the vegetables as if they're going to cook themselves, what, you think could happen with
the right spell. She crosses her arms and lets out a frustrated sigh.

"Crap." She mutters before a tomato simply rolls across the board and hits a carrot.

"Do you need any help?" She looks up as you enter the kitchen. Her eyes shining somehow.

"At my age, you'd expect me to know how to make a simple stew without having to use magic."
She doesn't ask for help, but the way she's crossing her arms and frowning slightly says enough to
you.
You roll up your shirtsleeves and move closer to look at the gathered vegetables. The kitchen
window exhibits the small connection that the clearing has with the sea. The waters seemed
choppy that night and barely colored purple.

"I've cooked my whole life without magic, don't be a crybaby." After the earrings episode, you felt
her guard dropped a little with you. She sure as hell didn't act with you the way she acted with
Hooty or even Eda sometimes. Yet now she purses her lips more often and has longer
conversations with you. She also started leaving books for you more often, most of them she had
already read and wanted your opinion on them. What you were happy to give, you even started
reading them faster just so you could talk to her. Yeah, you could be a silly teenager when it came
to Lilith Clawthorne.

For all these reasons you now feel you have enough freedom for occasional jokes.

"Did you use to cook at home?" You just nod your head as you turn off two of the burners and
take the pots off the heat. Taking the one that was left to fill with water.

“My parents are the type who believe women need to learn to serve men. Learning to cook is at
the top of the list.” Which was kind of ironic, considering your mom only cooked at home when
she hosted her friends from church, you've been cooking every day since you were 13. Her eyes
follow you as you put the pot back on the stove. “I usually mix the seasonings with the water and
let it boil for a while and then add the chopped vegetables.” Lilith compressed her lips into a thin
line for a moment before nodding her head.

"I guess I can spice it up, I'm good with flavors." You make an extravagant gesture to the pot
before walking past her to reach the counter. God. She smells good after a shower. Even fresher,
even sweeter. It takes everything in you not to get any closer.

You find a sharp knife in one of the drawers that you remember Eda going through to make dinner.
Potatoes and carrots are first, as you would have to peel off the skin.

It's not strange to be side by side with Lilith, a witch, in another world, while she moved a spoon in
the pot on the stove. Again what you feel in this house, perhaps from the first moment inside these
walls, is comfort. Cooking for people you've learned to like over the days is much more enjoyable
than cooking for an imposed obligation.

The knife slides easily through the potato skins, forming a bunch of strips on the countertop. You
were proud of being able to peel potatoes without any pieces of them getting stuck in the skin. The
kind of activity to clear your head. With your head in the clouds as your grandmother was so fond
of punctuating.

"What is the food in your world like?" You weren't expecting a question. You weren't expecting
her voice to sound so close. Your head snaps up extremely fast, a miscalculation that makes the
knife slip from your hand to scrape the finger holding the potato.

"Ouch!" It's just a reflex, it doesn't really hurt. You've had worse. But the knife has cut some of the
superficial skin, and there's a lot of blood coming out. "Shit! Are there paper towels here?” You
look for an answer in her as you press your hand against the cut and what you find is panic in your
direction. Palpable panic that seems to come out of her in waves. Her eyes are bloodshot and
glassy, her jaw so tight you're afraid she'll break a bone. "Lilith, it's just a scratch." Of all the
things you imagined seeing, a blood panic witch was one of the last. Your eyes dart to the
surrounding shelves, searching for anything to wrap around your finger. You spot a dishtowel on
the edge of the sink and grab it, wrapping it tightly around the cut.
“I'm sorry. I…” Your eyes glance at her again now that you're sure you won't make a bloody mess
on the counter. She's breathing heavily now, heavy breaths that make her chest move rapidly as if
she's trying to get more oxygen to her brain. You can't deny that it scares you a little because she
looks like she's on the verge of breaking down. "I distracted you and..." She opens and closes her
mouth, trying to say something you can't quite understand. You swear her eyes got brighter and if
you didn't consider her the iron lady you'd say it was tears. But... Why tears? Because you were
stupid enough to cut your own finger? "I'm-I'm sorry, I didn't mean..." You frown even more. Is
she really blaming herself? For this?

Well. So we had two traumatized kids in this house. What the hell happened to her for her to think
that just because she talked to you the cut was her fault?

"I'm fine, it's just a scratch." Because it was just a scratch. And you only cut yourself because you
were a gay mess idiot who couldn't handle a little reciprocation adequately. It wasn't her fault. God.
It would never be her fault. "May you just get me a band-aid? So I can stop the blood? Everything
will be fine." You talk to her in your best tone. A tone you would use with a kid. She opens and
closes her mouth again and then swallows hard for a moment, before nodding her head and starting
to search the cabinets.

You believe you saw feathers on the floor and you don't think they were there before.

You press the fabric harder against your finger as you watch her return with a small box, a red
cross drawn on the lid. Some things never change.

“I could heal you with magic…” She opens the box and presses her lips together quite hard before
saying the next words. "If I still had my powers." It's her tone of voice, an octave lower than usual.
It's the way her hands seem to be trembling around the little box. How it should be? To have magic
all your life, slipping out of your fingers and then have it ripped away? That should hurt. A lot. But
for some reason, you feel it's not that. This is not what is making her fingers tremble, it's not what
is making her press her teeth hard enough to break her jaw.

“So you never got hurt? No colored band-aids?” You didn't handle other people's heavy emotions
well, you hated seeing other people in pain or discomfort. Your father always said you were
selfless. The truth is, you felt it, very deeply. Other people's pain could enter you so easily and
that's what happens now. A lump forms in your throat just from looking at her. That's the reason
for the jokes, the fun comfort. You wanted her to stop feeling poor, not just because you cared
about her on some level, but for the reason it affected you more than you could say.

She looks up at you again and you don't remember ever seeing so several emotions in her. She...
She seems miserable, nostalgic, and even slightly amused by your comment, considering the small
twitch at the corner of her lips. Perhaps that's why she'd rather be that brick wall, always so harsh.
You feel overwhelmed with so much to analyze in her, with so much she's showing at once. She is
like a spectrum of colors, there is no definite emotion. Complex. Intriguing. Sore.

She takes a small pot with clear liquid in it and puts it on the counter, as well as some colorful
band-aids with heart designs, which you're sure were Luz's work.

"Let me clean it." You would object, because, really, you're not 12 years old and might as well
clean a knife cut. But you're so weak when she looks you in the eyes, one green, one gray, they
seem to glow for it. Please let me clean up my mess. Please just let me do this, let me help. You
want to tell her she hasn't done anything at all, but there's something in the back of your head that
says it won't do much good.

For that reason, you remove the dishtowel and allow her to take your hand in hers. The size
difference wasn't glaring, but her hands are bigger than yours and certainly warmer.

She grabs a cotton ball and dips it in the clear liquid before running over your finger with it. You
shudder because it stings a little. She looks up, looking at you, looking for confirmation before
continuing. You swear you can hear her mutter a low "sorry", but she doesn't move her lips. A nod
and she continues, wiping the blood around the cut. It had been a little wider than you imagined,
you'd probably have to avoid bending that finger for the next few days. Yet you would lie if you
said your attention is on it, your eyes follow her fingers, delicate and firm, cleaning the cut with all
her care. You thought only Eda was the motherly here, but apparently it was a characteristic that
ran in the blood.

Lilith wraps the cut with gauze and then finishes the bandage with two heart band-aids. It was cute,
you had to admit.

"Better?" She inquires, her voice still slightly lower than usual, one of her long hands holding your
fingers as if she's holding baby birds. Now free of the blood, you finally get to notice your
surroundings and how close she is now. She came incredibly near to bandage and now, you have
the perception that if you lift your head a little bit, your nose will touch her cheek.

"Uh-huh." Wow. A 3-year-old would say something better. "Thank you." You add then, bending
your head down, really afraid that you might not be able to hold your own impetuses. You would
end up staring into those overly intense eyes that seemed to be wanting to get inside of you. Your
ears were hot again.

"I'm honestly sorry." Her fingers release yours and she pulls back far enough so you feel it's safe to
look up. She has lost some of her posture, her shoulders are slightly down as her head is bent. Eyes
on the floor.

Embarrassment. She's embarrassed. It was just a little cut on your finger and she seems to act as if
you weren't able to walk for the rest of your life.

You want to touch her so bad now it hurts. Because... Because you feel that. You feel what it's like
to blame yourself for everything, even what you have no control over. You still do that sometimes,
even though you know it's not your fault, it's nobody's fault and people don't have to do anything
but respect you, you blame yourself. Perhaps if you had tried harder, if you hadn't drunk that much.

You understand what it's like to be the kind of person who feels too much.

She feels so deeply, but she keeps everything. How has this woman not exploded yet? How she
managed to walk through this house as if she was in control of everything, made of steel and
insurmountable when in fact she could barely deal with the possibility of committing the slightest
harm to anyone, even if unintentionally. She couldn't handle herself most of the time.

You're not sure how she's going to feel about this. Still, you've been very impulsive around Lilith
and it's basically through these impulsive acts that you feel she's becoming a little more readable.
That's why you reach up and touch her shoulder, squeezing gently. You watch her eyes go to your
hand and then back to you, wide. They glow in the slightly dark kitchen.

"Please." God, your voice sounded horrible when you were holding back tears. "I don't need your
apology, it was just an accident." You expect her to dodge your touch, to take your hand off her
shoulder because she looks so frightened with every touch just beyond her hands. But she doesn't.

She takes a deep breath, her eyes watering just for a moment extremely fast. She blinks several
times in a row, trying to banish it, trying to prevent you from seeing so much probably. But still,
Lilith grabs your hand on her shoulder, it's a sharp gesture, but it's not rough, her fingers are still
gentle and warm.

She doesn't push you away, she just presses your hand against her shoulder. Perhaps you weren't
the only one starving for the human touch.

Perhaps you were more alike than you could imagine.

"I hurt my sister…" Eda. She hurt Eda, the most lovely and gentle woman you've ever met. She
was allied with everyone's enemy and she hurt Eda. It's kind of ridiculous that you only get a few
glimpses of her in the strangest ways possible. And it's kind of understandable that no one had the
decency to tell you the whole story. It wasn't theirs to tell. "She forgave me, of course, she did."
You can't see her eyes from the angle, but you know if you could they would be teary because her
voice went down another octave. She truly loves her. She truly loves Eda. That explains a lot. The
steel lady... The steel lady can't handle forgiveness. She probably didn't want that forgiveness.
"But..."

But she didn't forgive herself. An anime song echoes in your head, like snow that hasn't completely
melted under a tree.

She can't handle herself, can't handle what she's done, let alone the prospect of hurting someone
else again, even in such a superfluous way.

She pulls away to lean her hip against the kitchen counter. Your hand drops and you immediately
miss the warmth of her skin.

You don't exactly know if you have any words of comfort to give her. But you need to try, right?
That's the whole point, to be honest.

"I understand what it's like not to like yourself, not knowing how to deal with yourself for a long
time." And you weren't lying. You felt it was your fault for most of your life and you couldn't
forgive yourself for it, make peace with yourself. Lilith glances at you with interest, asks you to
proceed without the need for words. "But it's not all your fault." When the words come out of your
mouth the brunette shakes her head negatively, as if you were saying some nonsense. She's smiling
with a bit of irony now.

"I'm a big girl, I shouldn't push my problems on other people." You compress your lips and avoid
the urge to roll your eyes. Stubbornness seemed to run in the blood as well.

“I'm not saying to push the blame onto other people. I'm saying it doesn't matter if others blame
you or not if you blame yourself.” Lilith frowns this time in your direction and you sigh deeply
before leaning against her side again. “Forgive yourself can be harder than asking for forgiveness.
But having forgiveness is already a path.” She follows you with her eyes but doesn't move her
head, which makes her gaze seem more intense than it actually was at the time. You can't imagine
what it would be like to face this witch in battle. "You just have to try to be good for all of the
times that you never could." Now she frowns, doubt evident on her face at this reference she sure
as hell doesn't know. "It's a song." You complete. "I'll be good, I'll be good for all of the times
that I never could." You hum, feeling your cheeks heat up a little. It's been a while since you've
sung, at least not since the day you fell on the boiling isles.

Your eyes risk catching a glance from the woman beside you. She still looks a little tense,
shoulders stiff and breathing heavily. But she has a small grinning at the corner of her mouth now.
The same smile, slightly amused.
"You have a beautiful voice." If your cheeks were getting hot, they burn now, just like your ears.
You feel the heat rising excessively quickly from your chest to color the skin of your face and
cartilage. She's never given you a compliment and just the way she says those words, in that voice,
makes all the skin on your body shiver and curl under itself.

"Th-thank you." Stuttering was simply the height of gay panic. Lilith lets out another giggle, just
like the one she let go in her bedroom. The sound surprises you enough for you to look up at her
again.

"And the red suits you." Did she...Did she just make fun of you? You can't believe your own ears.
She was mocking of your shame. This woman who was seconds away from almost having a panic
attack was mocking you. You cross your arms over your chest, embodying the 15-year-old inside
of you. "Oh don't be like that." It's not your imagination when she leans in just enough for her
breath to touch your face. Your heart starts beating fast enough so that you barely know what to do.
What the hell, Lilith Clawthorne? "I think it's pretty cute." Her voice sounds right over your skin
and your whole body trembles. You try not to show it so blatantly, but it's really hard when she's
this close, when her voice sounds like that, when she smiles from the corner of her mouth in such a
suggestive way. If she touches you now, she's likely to notice how hot you are.

This could not be considered normal. This is not normal. The way your breathing picks up in your
throat cannot be considered normal.

Is she flirting with you? Was that flirting? Did she just call you cute?

"FAMILY, I’M HOME!" Eda's voice coming from the living room is what makes her pull away,
one last amused glance in your direction.

Just that look was enough for your legs to turn to jelly instantly.

You feel like you're just starting to breathe normally again when Eda appears in the kitchen
archway.

“Y/N. Magpie." She greets. You can feel Lilith rolling her eyes. Again you keep that word,
determined to research what it meant as soon as you got back to your room. "Oh! Are you two
making stew?" Eda leans over the counter and stares at your face, probably still red, and then
stares at her sister, one eyebrow raised. "How sweet." She adds and then walks away giggling, in
almost the same suggestive way Lilith was smiling earlier. "I'm going to take a bath. Have fun."
She hums. You watch the owl lady walk away with her eyebrows slightly drawn together.

She looked excited. Almost too excited. But Eda always looked excited so you just shrugged.

"We should finish dinner." Lilith's voice is what brings you back to reality. But she's not in the pot,
she's trying to peel another potato.

You don't object. Because you know she won't let you get that knife again.

"We really should." You watch the water in the pot for a moment and smell it to see what spices it
has already added. She truly had a way with flavors and with leaving you super troubled, but that
didn't help with dinner.

"Since you won't let me cut anything else...Can I set the table?" You're pretty sure you see her
smiling for a brief second before she nods.

"Just stay away from the knives."

(...)

That was what was written in the Hexide's library dictionary in the letter M.

Mag•pie /’maɡˌpī/

1 . a bird with black and white feathers and a long tail;

You thought it made sense since the Clawthorne sisters constantly got involved with owls and
ravens.

Yet, it's the second meaning that makes your ears seem on fire.

2 . a person who hoards small objects.

Magpies are attracted to small, shiny objects, which they carry away to their nests.

That was the example.

You weren't stupid. The way Eda said that word and how she seemed to start saying it the day you
arrived at that house or using it when you were around.

Your cheeks get a little redder and you slam the book shut before crawling into your blankets.

Eda thought Lilith had some interest in you. Some interest in carrying you, a little human, to her
nest.

You don't want to think about the implications of that. Not even. Because your heart is already
starting to beat faster, just with the possibility.

You stuck your earphones in your ears and played The Lumineers songs until tiredness took over
your head and you fell into a restless sleep.

You dreamed of a day at the beach. The palest skin you've ever seen. Hair as black as pitch, the
only white streak. Bright eyes of different colors and a wide, toothy smile that seemed to be bathed
in sunlight.

She couldn't be more out of the picture herself and yet you've never seen a woman so beautiful.
And when she smiles like that at you, it seems like a lot of things make sense. The way your heart
beats, the way she smells, the way her breath warms and touches your cheek.

You think the ocean has the color of one of her eyes. That's your last thought before she wraps one
hand around your chin and pulls you toward her.

When you opened your eyes again, you felt the back of your head was drenched in sweat and your
fingers were trembling. You don't remember the last time you woke up so heated inside and out, as
if you had a fever, probably never.

You were screwed.

That was the truth to be faced.

You were so screwed.

 Chapter 6
Chapter Notes

I really loved writing this one I have no idea why

"Truth or dare?" Her eyes narrow slightly in your direction as she takes a sip from the cup with
purplish liquid. You can swear that the two are glowing with different colors, like those of a night
bird. It's impossible not to be fascinated by this.

Luz raises her eyebrows at you, waggling them suggestively, which makes you feel like rolling
your eyes. King is intently watching the game from one of the sofa cushions. Eda strokes his back
with her fingernails as she waits for your response. Hooty for his part looks very comfortable in the
lap of the woman who just asked you the question, eyes on you.

"Truth." You mutter, watching your glass of foreign wine that you hoped wasn't as strong as the
smell threatened to be. You used to get drunk relatively quickly and last time it didn't end so well.

"Smooth, Lily. There are youngsters in the room." You laugh softly at the mortal expression the
older woman gives her sister for that comment.

"What did you dream about last night?" It's a common question. She could have asked that to
anyone in the room. There would be no way. No. There would be no way for her to know, would
there? Was there something about the dreams in the boiling isles?

You had been having the same recurring dream, bright eyes, wide smile, lips tasting like sea salt.
How could she know that?

She couldn't. Your ears are getting warm again, and you are grateful that your hair is covering
them. There's no way she could have any idea what you've been dreaming about, and even if in
some remote world she did, it's not like you're to blame.

You take a long sip of your drink before looking at her. It warms you up inside and seems to give
you a little more courage. There is nothing on her face that says she knows. She has her eyebrows
slightly raised waiting for an answer, but the suggestive smile is not on her lips, her eyes are not
twinkling with that slight amusement. She doesn't know, she would have no way of knowing.

"With the sea." It wasn't a lie, but it's not the whole truth either. You should be a lawyer.

"She's lying." Hooty hummed as he moved his head in Lilith's lap. You frowned your eyebrows.

"No. I'm not." You picked up the nearest pillow to throw at the bird that stuck his tongue out. That
was probably the strangest thing that ever happened to you.

"I'm a very sensitive house. I know when someone is lying." You roll your eyes hard, afraid that
they will get stuck in the back of your head.

"I'm not the kind of person who keeps much of what one dreams." Another lie. But no one needed
to know.
"Lying again!" Added Hooty and you narrowed your eyes in his direction, pondering whether it
would be possible to make a chicken in sauce with him.

"So, spin the bottle, Y/N." You blink several times to return to this world with Luz's voice and then
spin the little bottle in the center of the room. It spins and spins and spins in a way that your
already slightly drunk head can't quite keep up with. The options were few, so when the mouth of
the bottle points to Lilith you are cheerily surprised. You certainly had a lot of things to ask her.
Far more questions than would be appropriate for a game of truth or dare.

"Truth or dare?" She's grinning with the corner of her lips now, barely, still enough to make your
heart start beating a little faster.

"I'm an open book, ask anything." Eda raises an eyebrow at that, probably because Lilith's voice
sounded a little too drawn out. You guys should probably cut off the alcohol. Still, there is a small
smile on your mouth as you rest your chin on your palm, thinking about what you would like to
ask.

"Were you mama's little girl when you were a kid?" She certainly had this perfect little kid aura by
the way she was a perfectionist with absolutely everything. It was meant to be a joke. But you felt
it immediately, something that hadn't happened in a while, you felt the metal wall falling like
poisoned ice around her. It's so sudden and so noticeable in the air that chilled your bones.

Lilith opened and then closed her mouth again. Her jaw set, her eyes losing some of their former
amused gleam. Oh shit, you had touched on a sensitive subject.

"Hmm, no. I never was." There is silence then. Eda looks at King's back, Luz is staring at the floor,
she obviously felt the mood weighing down. Hooty seems to be the only one still cheerful. You
feel extremely stupid, just ask her what is her favorite color, or whatever her favorite animal is.
You would be truly surprised if it wasn't a raven. But no, you had to touch on parent issues that she
probably didn't want to stir up.

Stupid. Dumbass.

"Your turn, Lulu." Hooty swivels his head in her lap so he can look her in the eye.

"I need to refill after this one. You can go on my turn, Hootcifer." Lilith stood up and your eyes
immediately went to her, as was usual. She's wearing dark clothes that night, black pants, and a
blouse that seems to blend in with her hair. Or perhaps it was just the wine doing its job. You move
away from your place on the floor for her to pass, and she doesn't look at you as she heads toward
the kitchen.

Back to square one with a single comment. You were just plain dumb.

"Spin the bottle, Hooty." The bird goes excited and singing to the bottle as you cringe against your
own pillow. Perhaps disappearing now would be a good way out. She probably wouldn't talk to
you ever again. Congratulations, Y/N. Congratulations, you made your crush uncomfortable in
your first truth or dare game.

However, before Hooty could move his beak to the bottle, something breaks. It takes you a little
over a second to notice that it wasn't that bottle and that the sound came from the other room. Your
head moves in record time to the hallway leading to the Owl House kitchen. You don't remember
the light being off.

Lilith. You think, but do not say.

"Lily?" Eda is the first to say something. She pushes King's paw away and sits down. Maybe you
guys should stop with the drinks if you were already at the point of knocking over bottles.

There is a muffled sound. Like the beginning of a word that gets lost in the air. Sounds like "he".
You frown.

"Lulu?" Added Hooty, doubt emanating from his voice just like Eda's.

All your attention is focused on the hallway. But there is no answer. That's why you and Eda stand
up in almost the same second as Hooty slid all the way in front of you. You don't want to analyze
why you acted so rapidly at that moment. Eda had the excuse that it was her sister, you were an
adult and wanted to help. Good, keep repeating this until you believe it.

A shiver runs down your back before you even reach the kitchen because Hooty lets out a loud
gasp.

Something is wrong. Something is awfully wrong. Your heart starts beating fast enough for you to
start gasping for air when you notice that something is dripping on the floor. It's not blood. It's
wine. The two bottles that were on the counter are broken on the floor. But that's not why Hooty
gasps and that's not why your fingers are shaking.

There are scratches. There are scratches the size of your arm on the wood of the counter, on the
kitchen floor, on the back door that now lay shattered.

Something. Something attacked Lilith. Something with enormous claws.

"We...We have to go after her." It's your instinct to look for your cell phone in the back pocket of
your pants. The light in the kitchen is out. Your next action is to turn on the flashlight so that you
can see anything.

Eda, Hooty, and Luz are watching the marks with the same amazement in their eyes. Something
bordering on dread. They are as frightened as you are. A small bead of sweat trickles down your
neck.

Lilith. Where is Lilith? What's got Lilith? You want to shout because they are all standing around
watching the marks, except King who is clinging to Luz's leg, looking scared enough to not even
approach. But they are just looking.

"Eda. Where do we have elixir?" You frown in Luz's direction. Why on earth was she talking about
elixir when something had caught Lilith? Something large, something that could be hurting her.

"I've been stocking some bottles in my closet. I should probably start spreading them around the
house." She lets out a loud and concerned sigh, rubbing her forehead with the fingertips. "Anyway,
I'll get them. You go to the living room and stay close to Hooty. Do NOT try anything until I get
back. It's the first time, she could easily eat one of you." What? What the hell?

"What about Lilith? Will we just leave it at that? There must still be a way to go after it, to save
her." Eda looked at you, just for a second. She frowned and then simply ignored you.

"Make light glyphs on the walls or floor. I'll be back in 2 seconds." And so she left. She didn't seem
the least bit upset that her sister might already be dead and that makes the heat rise in you. You're
getting pissed off because nobody seems to be listening to you. Everyone is doing a great job
ignoring you.

"Come on, Y/N. We have to stay together." Luz grabs your hand and starts to pull you back into
the room, but you pull it back.

"I'm not going to hide. We have to go after Lilith if you don't think she's worth it..." Luz sighs this
time and she looks actually frustrated, that's why you shut up.

"Lilith is fine, Y/N. I promise you that, just stay with us. Don't do anything stupid." She grabs your
hand again and pulls you in. This time you allow it, even if you don't feel safe in her words. Those
claw marks would wander into your dreams, haunt you. Possibly forever.

A thud happens upstairs as if something extremely heavy hits the floor of the highest part of the
house. It takes everything in you not to let go of Luz's hand and run up the stairs.

You can hear how your heart is beating faster and faster. Your breathing is getting weaker and
weaker. You have to calm down, but how can you calm down if...

"Okay. Last time we used a light spell. Eda thinks it might work again. Y/N, help me make a light
glyph. Let's do it on the floor." You frown even more. "Here." Luz takes a crayon out of her back
pocket. You have no idea why she carries crayons around. Probably for situations like this.

"Poor Lulu, hoot, hoot." You glance at Hooty and open your mouth, about to ask if he was the only
sensible one who was thinking about Lilith.

"Y/N, FOCUS." You don't remember Luz looking this agitated before, she's being a lot more of an
adult than you if you are going to be honest. You compress your lips tightly and fighting against all
your instincts you begin to trace the circle on the floor.

"I'm going to take a look at the second floor. Eda's taking her time." Hooty propelled himself up
and the door closed behind him. You tried to keep your head focused as you slid the crayon across
the floor. It wasn't meant for that and it was a little trickier to draw, the color fading into the wood.

"HOOTY! DON'T GET INTO THE..." But it was too late, before Luz could finish shouting her
realization, Hooty let out a chirp loud enough to shiver your spine. And then all the lights went
out.

The shiver that runs through your body now can't be described as anything but terrifying. Your hair
stand on end, your breath hitches. You can barely see an inch in front of you. What is it? Where is
Lilith? Why can't anyone have the decency to give you some answers?

King lets out a squeal and rushes off, grabbing your leg instead of Luz's. The girl is quick to make
a light spell.

"We have to keep going. Hooty's out. It's just us." At one time you would admire the focus and
how Luz faced this situation with maturity. But now. Now all you can do is try to follow the lines
of the circle in the dim light, raising your cell phone flashlight while scribbling with your other
hand.

Lilith had been caught. Hooty is out, apparently. Eda may have been caught too for all you know.

It's picking up one by one. What chance did you and Luz have against something whose claws
could very well tear you apart with a single gesture?

What is it? And how did it get past the Owl House's defenses? How could Hooty not feel it? How
did Hooty not protect you as he did from even the most daring squirrels?

"HIDE OUT!" It's Eda's voice from the stairs, just a second before the front door is knocked down,
or rather thrown open. The wood passes close to your head and slams across the room, crashing
down. Your eyes go to Hooty first, but his tube is still taut, you have no idea where his head is.

You hear its breathing first, heavy and panting. A wild animal after a fight.

And only then you did look at it, maybe it was a bit of a foolish decision, but you couldn't control
your impulses. It's large enough to get through the front door only if it sneaks. Claws the size of
your arms perfectly placed on the floor of the room. Wide, spreading wings that looked silvery in
the moonlight. The creature is covered in black feathers and...Maybe hair? Large pointed ears, eyes
as dark as tartar itself, indicating that the creature is probably blind or very sensitive to light. And
finally, a wide mouth, wide enough to swallow your head whole at once, also seems to glow a
silvery hue, with fully sharpened, golden teeth, two rather protruding fangs that you are sure are as
sharp as knives.

The creature squeals and the sound echoes throughout the house. It makes your head dizzy with
how loud it is. Luz grabs your arm. She makes a silent gesture and pulls you (and King) until you
are in the safety of the back of the couch. She undoes the light spell, you turn off the flashlight on
your cell phone.

The creature's footsteps are heavy, it reminds you of a time when you went to the zoo and had a
chance to get close to watch a rhino, whenever they walked, you felt a massive vibration on the
floor, just like now. It's similar to feeling the beginning of a storm, the beginning of an apocalypse.
Your breathing is hard so you cover your nose with your own hand. The thing doesn't seem even a
little worried, its breathing is audible, extremely irregular, and loud. Your fingers are trembling and
you widen your eyes when something touches your shoulder.

But it's Eda. She slides to your side, something glowing between her fingers, it looks like a bottle of
liquid glowing in gold.

"I'll attract her. You finish the glyph. She's too strong, we won't be able to knock her out with
ordinary little lights." Your mind starts to short circuit for a moment. Too much information hitting
you at once.

"Can't we try to bind her with root spells?" Luz whispered back to the woman and Eda shook her
head negatively.

"She'll rip them off in two seconds, her claws are too sharp. We need to knock her out and I'm not
going to risk hurting my sister with fire or ice. Damn! I miss my sleeping potions." My...Sister. The
short circuit increases and you have to blink several times to get back to what Eda is saying.

"That...Is that Lilith?" Luz's and Eda's eyes meet you and your confusion. You must look quite
desperate and extremely white under their eyes, all the blood seems to be rushing into your limbs, a
very great need to run out. The thing's breathing seems closer now and your whole body shudders.
Is that thing...Lilith?

"Explanations later, kid. Help Luz." You open your mouth and close it again, but you don't have
time, because the owl lady is already getting up and running towards the stairs.

"JERK BIG SISTER SAYS WHAT?" The scream makes the creature squeal even louder. You,
Luz, and King cover your ears, feeling the vibrations from the floor as the creature began to run
toward the stairs, breaking everything in its path.

You are terrified and feel that your whole body is frigid, your stomach in a knot. But you will help
Luz with the rest of the glyph just the same. You're going against all your most primitive instincts,
all of which say that you should run out of this house as fast as you can and hide in a hole.

Sounds become absent in the house and everything inside you says that this is not a good sign. You
hurry up and finish the last line of the circle. Luz is making the inner circle, so you start the
triangle. You believe that you are drawing in the same rhythm as your heart beats, quite fast.
Another bead of cold sweat slides down your forehead and hits the floor.

Lilith. What the hell. She was a giant and probably mortal raven beast and yet all you can think
about is her.

Everything was extremely dark and you were focused on trying to finish the light glyph triangle.
Yet you had good hearing, years of training your ear to tune the guitar. So when it steps downstairs
again, you can almost feel it in the air. You know it is trying to be quiet, but the breathing is too
heavy and the paws are too big, the claws scrape the floor. Your ears identify the sound as soon as
it happens and your eyes widen. Something cold as ice itself runs through your heart, coming down
to rest on your diaphragm. Your instincts are fighting under your skin. Beg you to run, and another
thing screams for you to stay. You don't quite understand the another thing. Your heart is beating
so difficult now that you don't know how your fingers aren't trembling and messing up the glyph.

Luz looks up at you, there is dread on her face, her eyes wide and her mouth hanging open. And
then you feel it, an air breath just over your head.

Fuck. You almost wet yourself. Again. You don't want to turn around. You don't want to see it.

But you feel that if you don't even try, you will die in front of Luz, death by stupidity. You don't
want to give her this trauma, so you act against everything you believe in.

When you turn around, your legs go limp. It's a good thing you were on your knees otherwise, you
would fall to the floor. The creature is breathing heavily against your face, it's warm, and it smells
of wine. Dark eyes that seem to want to consume your soul, slightly slanted to the side, like those
owls that had little heart-shaped faces. You've always thought they were really cute. Well... you
were quite wrong. Those eyes make your spine quiver and everything you've eaten all day wants to
go back up your throat.

This can't be Lilith. This can't be that woman who was drinking and playing a few minutes ago.

But you feel it. Somehow you know it's her in there, moreover, the creature seemed to have a pretty
similar hairstyle to the witch.

What are the chances she won't eat you?

"Lilith...Hi Lilith." The creature growls, or screeches. You are not sure. Moonlight hits something
shiny she has around her mouth and it blinds you for a brief moment. Luz is scribbling behind you,
too fast, too loud. She wants you to understand.

Distract her.

You just need time.

Distract this giant thing that is probably wondering which spots you have the softest flesh.

"I know...We're not the best of friends, but I'd hate for you to blame yourself for my death." The
thing growls again, your insides quivering. How could you make jokes when you were on the
brink of death? It was part of your dark type of humor.
"Kid! You have to get away from her, slowly." Eda's voice sounds quite distant, even though you
feel she is on the stairs. Something flares. It sounds like a fire spell. She wouldn't hurt Lilith, would
she? Caring about the witch when she was about to kill you, that was a new high point of altruism.

Yet, you don't take your eyes off her. Because she doesn't take her eyes off you. A predator staring
at its prey. That's what it looks like. On the Discovery Channel, there were whole episodes about
this. About the fixed eyes, outlined by wrinkles of concentration as well as between the eyebrows,
about the protruding and threatening teeth, about the ears contracted to try to catch as much sound
as possible, about the attempt to control her breathing. If you moved now, she would rip your guts
out with her claws.

"Y/N, NOW!" You don't know what Eda sees that makes her scream. What you do know is that in
the next second the mass of feathers and muscles jumps out at you. Your eyes widen and then you
close them in sheer dread. You expect the teeth, tearing into the flesh of your face, you expect the
claws, breaking the skin of your belly. You're trembling. Would it be like this? After avoiding
death for weeks would you end up dying in the boiling isles anyway?

But...Nothing happens. You feel that her claws are pressed just beside your belly and her face is
quite close because her breath hits you with hot, heavy puffs. But nothing happens.

You face her then. There are no more wrinkles of concentration. She's still scary as hell, but she
doesn't look like she's going to eat you. You can swear her eyes return to normal. Just for a brief
second, just for a brief second you see the green and silver of her eyes, much bigger than usual
because the creature was huge. But it's her.

It's Lilith. And Lilith is not going to hurt you.

"Y/N, CLOSE YOUR EYES!" Luz shouted and so you did because you knew what was going to
happen. The flash of light this time is intense enough for you to feel the waves of the spell swaying
around you. The creature squeals once more, but it's not threatening, it's painful. For some reason,
your heart squeezes. She leaps away from you and you hear the heavy sound of a huge body falling
beside you in the next second.

The whole house seems to tremble with that crash.

When you open your eyes again you feel dizzy. Luz is beside you almost before you can blink,
grabbing your arm and pulling you away from the feathered body that is slumped beside you.

"Eda, the elixir!" She seems calmer, but her fingers are squeezing you hard enough to mark.

The owl lady's steps are quick and she rapidly reaches for the raven beast, stuffing the golden
bottle into her mouth.

It's only then that Luz lets out her breath. King leaps into your midst, grabbing at your clothes with
his little paws.

"I thought we were finally free of that kind of event." The little demon says as he curls up a little
tighter against you. Eda wheezes with a laugh. You don't feel you are in the mood to laugh right
now. It takes everything in you not to check whether your pants are dry or not.

The owl lady seemed about to let out a joke, however, she stopped halfway.

"Wha...What's that?" She pulls out something that shines brightly in the moonlight. It's what
blinded you, you notice now. It looks like a beautiful, gleaming stones necklace.
A necklace? Was the beast carrying a necklace around?

That's when Eda truly begins to laugh. A loud laugh filling the entire dark house. You frown and
look at Luz and King, searching for an answer that they don't have either by their confused
expression.

"I can't believe it." She sits back against the wall, wiping the corners of her eyes with her fingers,
but still holding the necklace. "It seems that the cursed version of my sister wanted to court you."
Your eyebrows pronounce even more. Court? You? The raven beast was trying to court you? The
confusion must be quite visible even in the dark because Eda proceeds without your asking.
"Ravens have a habit of trying to give shiny and small things to their possible.... Pairs. That
explains why she didn't rip a piece of your face off. She didn't want to. I'll never let her forget that."
The owl lady starts to laugh again, and this time Luz and King follow her. You open your mouth,
surely with hundreds of questions to ask. But they all disappear, only the blush remains. A blush
that rises in your chest, spreads to your neck, and colors your cheeks. Even if she was a
beast...Lilith tried to give you a necklace, as part of a courtship? You try not to look at Luz because
you are sure she will be waggling both eyebrows suggestively and you already had too much to
deal with. "And this little beauty is mine now." Eda simply shoves the necklace into the middle of
her hair. Another thing that you would have frowned at, but that in the face of the current situation
you could no longer consider anything strange. "That should be enough." Finishes the owl lady,
pulling the empty bottle from the creature's mouth.

You watch as the body glows with blue light, soft and warming, it doesn't blind you as much as the
light spell, it just bothers a little. The feathers are gone to make way for thin arms. The ears shrink
back to normal size. The feathered mane goes and long black hair emerges. The claws go away and
legs and hands bring back the raven lady.

Lilith.

"I'll take her to bed. You guys go have a look at Hooty, I think he needs a bandage." Something
inside you scratched and screamed desperately, contesting when Eda stood and took her sister in
her arms, as if she were a child and weighed absolutely nothing. These women certainly hid a great
deal of strength.

But you were only a human. She was her sister. No one had more right to take care of her than Eda.

"No need to worry, girl." The owl lady offered you a complicit little wink. You have no idea what
is on your face for Eda to think she needs to reassure you. But you certainly believe you get even
redder, your ears burning now. "She just needs to sleep. She'll be brand new when she wakes up."
And she's gone before you can add anything, even if you have no idea what you would like to add.
You feel a knot in your stomach of pure shame.

You were a gay mess who couldn't control your own expressions and now the entire Owl House,
except for Hooty, was probably already aware of your crush. That was a level beyond
embarrassing.

The thing is...There was a tiny chance...That this crush was even remotely reciprocal.

You get up in the next second and didn't look at your friends before you started your search for
Hooty.

You needed to occupy your mind and fast. Helping the bird with a bandage seemed like a good
way out of the "A giant raven tried to courtship me and that raven was Lilith Clawthorne" matter.
Creature Fear by Bon Iver is playing repeatedly in your head as you go up the stairs.
 Chapter 7
Chapter Notes

Two best friends on a roof. They might kiss.

See the end of the chapter for more notes

"You should get some sleep." An exhausted smile spread on your mouth as you put a little bobble
hat on Hooty's head. Yes, Hooty was giving you advice. Hooty who's face was slightly scarred,
two kitten band-aids decorating it. He would be healed soon, the Owl House had a stupidly good
healing system. "I mean it, Y/N." You close your eyes a tiny harder than necessary. The back of
your head hurts and your corneas burn. You certainly needed sleep, everyone was asleep, but there
was a lot of adrenaline in your body. If you lay down on your mattress you would be tossing and
turning without sleeping. That's why you are sitting on the porch of the house, watching the light
globes shining in the sky above you. It's not that cold tonight, but cold enough to keep you awake.
"I can tell you a little bedtime story." Hooty added then, stretching out enough to lay his head on
your shoulder. You scratched just below his beak and denied it with your head.

"Why don't you tell me a story, but other than a bedtime story?" The bird's eyebrows pronounced
and you chuckled a little. "How did you and Lilith become friends?" Hooty squirmed a little more
on your shoulder before beginning to speak.

"I liked her well before. She was pretty insistent about trying to break in." You can imagine this
happening. Lilith was pretty focused on trying to learn glyph magic, you can only imagine what
she was like back in the emperor's coven. "So when she moved in I tried to become friends with
her. I don't have a lot of friends, hoot, hoot, and she didn't seem to have either. Two weirdos could
be good friends." He was right about that. That is the basis of the friendship that was born at the
Owl House. "So I helped her get fire bee honey because she wanted to spy on her old buddies. She
didn't like it very much at first and we fought, but then she realized that she couldn't do it all by
herself. We became best friends since then." You are sure there are a few more things that Hooty
just doesn't have much attention directed to, but that was already a good story.

Your eyes close again and for a moment that's it. It's just you, Hooty, the sound of the wind singing
in the distance and the waves crashing on the shore even further away. Nothing else. Just calm.
Your adrenaline levels are softening, perhaps in an hour or two, you can get some sleep.

"Y/N." Hooty's singing voice makes you open one eye and then the other. He seems to be
chuckling. "Lilith's window has opened." You frown at this and he lets out a low but rather excited
"hoot". "Don't you want to talk to her, hmmmmm, hoot, hoot?" Well, you'd think that at least Hooty
wouldn't have noticed your not even slightly disguised little crush, but even from the bird, you
couldn't escape.

"She must be exhausted, Hooty. We'd better leave her alone." You barely finish saying those words
before Hooty wraps his beak around the collar of your sweatshirt and throws you onto his back.
"HOOTY. NO!" You want to yell at him, but everyone is asleep so it's more or less a shouted
whisper.

He stands up from the side of the house. Lilith's window is actually open, the bedroom lights on.
"Lulu, I have a gift for you." You would choke that tube bird the next chance you get, you swear.

"Hootsifer?" Her voice sounds slightly groggy through the window and the next thing you know
Hooty is gaining momentum on his back and throwing you face-first onto the floor of the raven
lady's room.

Ouch. You would kill him. Choking wouldn't be enough.

"Have fun!" He hums as he goes and you simply wish you never had to lift your face off that floor
again. You just want it to swallow you whole.

"Need a hand?" Your head lifts on its own. There is a slight smile stamped on Lilith's face as she
extends her hand to you. She looks pretty good overall, no feathers, no sharp claws.

She doesn't seem disturbed by your earlier comment either, perhaps she doesn't even remember it.
This is what you tell yourself to hold her fingers and get up off the floor. Her hand is quite warm.
However, even standing up, you still have to lift your head to look at her.

"Can't sleep either?" You nod in agreement, she must wonder why. Lilith lets out a deep sigh,
which you would interpret as frustrated. She certainly looks frustrated. She tilts her head up at the
lights in the room before turning her eyes back to you. "Would you climb on the roof with me?"
You frown until your eyebrows almost knit together.

"On the roof?" She shrugs for a moment and then with a long gesture of her hands the staff appears
between her fingers. You try not to stare at it because she is a witch. But it all seemed so
outstanding to you even after everything.

"When I was a kid and couldn't sleep..." She closes her eyes for only a brief second before sighing
with a tiny smile. "Eda and I used to play climbing on the roof. She would make up random things
in the middle of the night for us to do since I couldn't sleep." You bite your lower lip hard enough
to draw blood. There is so much you want to ask right now.

Eda said it was a curse, a curse she and Lilith shared, usually stronger when she was under
considerable pressure. But there are so many gaps in your head right now and you have no idea
whether to ask or not.

"I would love to." That's what you reply, even in the face of everything that's echoing in your head.
You would never deny a request from Lilith. Never. She just needs to ask. Her eyes light up for a
moment before she throws her staff in the air and it spreads its wings at the tip.

Lilith sits up as if she were riding a broom, since she's wearing pants, and then she reaches out her
hand to you again.

Well. You had already ridden a motorcycle and you had already flown in a helicopter. The feeling
couldn't be that different. And you trusted her enough not to eat your liver while in bestial form.
You thought that riding a staff would be simple then.

She puts your hand on her shoulder when you accept and then you ride the staff. It really is like
riding a broomstick, you remember from when you played Quidditch or pretended to play.

Although, when she flies off, you let out a yelp and grab her waist with both arms. Man, this is high
and this staff is thin. You feel like you're going to slip. Lilith lets out a loud, graceful laugh that
makes your whole face turn red. You hug her, too tightly, your chest pressing against her back hard
enough so that she can probably feel your heartbeat. Your legs almost touching hers.
God, she smells good. If it weren't for the wind in your face, and the numerous feet between you
and the ground you would have more time to analyze how her hair smells. But now your legs are
softening and you are quite sure that a few more seconds of this and your blood pressure would go
down.

"My first time was kind of like this, but I don't think I grabbed anyone that hard." It's only a few
seconds before you reach the tower of the house, the highest part of the Owl House. Your legs are
the consistency of jello as you get out first, eyes on the ground and face red. You couldn't help but
embarrass yourself even once.

Lilith, on the other hand, did not seem disturbed, only mildly amused.

You had never been to this part of the house before. But it seemed like an ordinary place for Lilith
considering that there was a blanket up there.

She sits down, with her legs close to her chest, and then, without exactly looking at you, she twirls
the tip of her staff. You had already seen Owlbert wandering around the house, so it's not exactly a
surprise when the little animal on the end of her staff comes to life. A white raven with very
piercing green eyes.

You sit down next to her, genuinely curious about it. A nice distraction from your teenage
attitudes.

"This is Riven." The little bird spreads its wings as if yawning and then simply hops into the palm
of your hand. You put your hands together in fear that he will fall and the little bird simply flops
between your fingers. You smile at this, you have always loved animals. "Oh, he likes you. That's
rare." You scratch behind the pet's head and he seems even more comfortable, tilting his head
toward your thumb.

"Sounds a lot like Raven." Lilith rolls her eyes at you and you feel the giggle on the tip of your
tongue.

"I was young and thought it would be a great pun, okay? Don't judge." You shrug as you rub just
below the bird's beak, causing him to close his eyes.

Silence establishes its reign for a few seconds and you feel the words scratching your tongue too
quickly.

"I'm sorry." She frowns as you say those words, you too in a way, and Riven tilts his head, a
curious eye on you. "Eda said you might have gotten stressed and that may have activated the
curse, so I'm sorry for the question..." Her eyes lift to you, the gray seems truly silver under the
moonlight and the green, brighter. She tilts her head towards you, twisting her lips for a moment.
She doesn't seem mad about it. Not at all.

"Don't apologize. You had no way of knowing." Lilith breaths profoundly and even though she's
calm and perfectly steady now you feel a bit of resentment coming off her in waves. "Do you have
siblings?" You deny with your head, you wish you had, especially an older brother. Perhaps things
would have been different.

"I'm an only child." Lilith consents with her head and again there is silence for a few seconds, just
the wind blowing hard, making your hair and hers fly away from your faces. You think that's it.
You will stare at the light globes for the next few hours.

"When Eda was born..." She pauses for a moment and you get static because
apparently...Apparently, she actually is going to tell you. You are about to hear the story. You
almost can't hold yourself in place. Wow. You can be a teen around her, for sure. "When Eda was
born I was only two years old. To me, it was like every day was a holiday. I loved playing with her
and helping to take care of her." She grins at the thought, not the careful smile with just one side of
her mouth, but a wide smile silvered by moonlight that makes your heart race. "As we grow
up...Well, it's common in every family that when a new child is born the attention is divided. The
youngest obviously needs the most care." You notice when she swallows a little before starting
again. "In my house, the attention wasn't divided. It was transferred." Oh. She was an overlooked
child. You almost reach out to touch her shoulder for how her voice sounded now. So...Resigned?
It's hard to read Lilith when she's saying so much about herself. You feel overwhelmed by the
slightest thing. Riven was between your fingers and you didn't know if she wanted to be touched
now, so you remain in your seat. "Eda has always been a troublemaker. Mom and dad barely had
time to take a breath before she was up to no good again." There is a tiny twitch of amusement on
her lips, but her eyes don't lie. That still hurts. Even after all this time. It's still an open wound.
"Mom, can you help me with my homework? Ah, Lilith dear, you're so smart, I'm sure you can
finish it on your own. Eda needs help with this potion." A sigh. Eyes in the sky. You wonder if
she's looking up to keep tears from falling. You used to do that a lot. It's much easier to look up and
avoid tears when you knew that if you started to cry you wouldn't stop. "I...I didn't blame Eda for
that. She...She's always been like that, you know? She doesn't need anyone's validation. She doesn't
need anyone to tell her she did right. I wish I could be like that." She looks at you and you just nod.
You are listening with all attention you have. You couldn't miss it. That's more than you've had in
weeks. "We were best friends." A real tear trickles down of her gray eye. She doesn't even notice
because it quickly runs down and hits the floor. But that doesn't stop all your hair from shivering.
Watching her cry...It's almost like scraping your skin. It's too uncomfortable.

Riven looks at her. He looks a little worried but he doesn't move either. He must sense that she
doesn't want anyone comforting her right now.

"Eda was messy, chaotic, and so fearless. But she was the most powerful witch in the whole
Hexide when she was still 11." You raise your eyebrows this time. You had some understanding
that the Clawthorne sisters had been very powerful witches before they lost their magic, but this is
impressive. "She had all of our parents' attention not just because she got into a lot of trouble. But
also because she was better than me...At absolutely everything." You feel your heart sink at that.
You feel how important it was to her. How much she wishes she could have heard a "well done"
just once. Would she be a little bit more open if she got the love she deserved? "She was
remarkable with magic, she was the star player of our team...And she was so much better at social
interactions than me." Well, the last part was a bit obvious even in this day and age. Eda was open
like a book, always cheerful and communicable. Lilith was a brick wall. Perhaps that's why. "I
have no idea how many times she punched people in the face to protect me. How many times she
got in front of bullies twice her size and yelled 'hey this is my sister you're talking to, you
dickhead'." She rests her chin on her hand and is not looking at you when a new smile breaks out
on her face, driven by memories. Still, her eyes are glistening with unshed tears, and your nose
tingles with it. "She even summoned an army of abominations to start a food fight when my lunch
money was stolen, maybe for the third time that week." Eda was born lucky. Lilith was lucky to be
born. That's what you hear. Even if she doesn't say it and it weighs on your stomach in a way you
didn't think was possible. You want to touch her so badly now it hurts. Of all people, you knew
what it was like to be the rejected nerd. "I'm the elder sister..." When her face contorts into a
grimace you already know what comes next.

The tears come quickly down her face. Thin and quick. Her eyes water. She feels too much. You
feel too much. You are two people who feel too much. You wish you could say something, but
she's not finished yet and you wouldn't have the courage to interrupt her. Never. Even if your heart
is breaking into pieces and pieces.

Lilith rubs her hands over her eyes, hard enough so you think she might hurt herself. She sniffles
before proceeding. Maybe she doesn't even realize you're still there. She's just saying. She's just
taking it out of her.

"I am the elder sister. I was supposed to protect her and that's all I didn't do." Riven doesn't care
anymore. He simply flies to her shoulder, wrapping himself around her hair. Lilith doesn't move to
remove him but she doesn't stroke him either. She seems miles away from that tower. Miles away
from herself. How could you grab her by the hand and pull her back?

"We... We didn't want to give up on our magic. When you join an ordinary coven you can only do
magic from that coven. However, in the Emperor's Coven, you have free access to all kinds of
magic. Eda was too free. She didn't want to give up anything, let alone of me. And I...I just wanted
to go as far away from home as possible, to work with the most powerful witches in the boiling
isles, to do some good for these lands." She sighs deeply and you can almost feel the air around her
getting colder. "Eda trained me all summer until I came in second place. We would go together. We
would do some good in the Coven. Together." You feel you are reaching the breaking point
because her lips are trembling and her fingers begin to do the same. "But then...On selection day,
after we beat the whole school, they told us there was only one spot available. We would have to
duel." You understand where this was going. A lump forms in your throat. She hurt Eda. She hurt
her little sister. "I should have asked...Eda had no intention of fighting me. She never did." She
looks down at her own hands now.

It's shame. She is ashamed of herself. She is ashamed of what she has done. Her shoulders slump.
She may be a brick wall in the daylight. But this...this is not coldness. This is not being made of
steel. She is exposing herself more than ever.

"I cursed her." Even after so many years saying that out loud feels like a punch in the stomach to
her. Her face contorts into another grimace and you wouldn't blame her if she threw up. "It was
only supposed to be for one day, just take away her powers for one day. I couldn't bear to lose
again." In front of the whole school. Failing again. Being second again. Being worse again, not
getting the least from her parents. Again. "But it wasn't for one day. And it wasn't a curse to
remove powers, but an owl beast curse." She sighs once again but still doesn't look at you. It's too
much. It's too much for you to digest at once. "I...I spent years looking for a cure. I went to every
healer, witch, library, and alley on the boiling isles. But nobody had one." You compress your lips.
You can't imagine the amount of guilt and self-loathing this woman carries. That explains quite a
lot actually. You have no idea how she hasn't exploded yet. "Nobody had a cure. The Emperor,
however, learned of my quest..And He promised me that he had a way and would cure Eda if I
brought her to the Coven. She was powerful and well...She was already well known in the boiling
isles." Eda Clawthorne. The owl lady. The boiling isles' most wanted criminal. You almost smile at
the thought. "So I tried. I tried so persistently. I talked to her. I asked. I begged. But Eda was just
fine without a coven...In fact, she seemed just fine running away and always escaping. I spent
years without having a glimpse at her." She finally raises her eyes to you. They look even brighter
now that they are splattered with tears. You believe she is biting her lips now hard enough to draw
blood. "It wasn't until last year's covention when I saw her again. When I realized how advanced
the curse was that I returned to my mission." Covention. Okay, another thing to research later.
"Again I tried every way...But Eda did not want to and would not join the Coven. I..." She stops for
a moment and averts her eyes before saying her next words. "I even kidnapped Luz and threatened
to kill her to try to convince her. And just at that moment, I had the scoundrel attitude to say to her
face that I had cursed her." Your eyes widen now. That was another level altogether and you are
not sure how to feel about that. How Luz and Eda manage to forgive her for that? Perhaps they
didn't. Perhaps they didn't forgive her completely. They were good people. Possibly they just
wanted their family together again, no matter what that family had done. "Eda turned into owl
beast permanently in that battle and I finally could take her in...But...The emperor didn't heal her.
He never intended to." You were not wrong when you thought you missed several important parts.
There were many twists and turns in that story. And you believe that it is at that moment that you
start to truly hate Emperor Belos. You had no reason before. Now you do. "He planned to kill her
as an example. That's when I decided on betrayal. He would have to kill me before touching Eda."
The elder sister. You feel how it weighs on her shoulders. How she feels she has failed, in
everything. "Luz and I saved her. Mainly Luz if I'm being honest..." She takes another deep breath,
the air warms a little more, but not enough to stop the shivers from running down your arms. "And
then I shared the curse. Just like when we were kids and she was hurt. I used to share the pain to
make her stop crying. Half is with me. Half is with her. That's why I turned into that, that's why the
white streak and the gray eye." She puts her hands together and Riven sprawls on them. "That's
what happened. That's why it's not your fault. No one is to blame in this story...Besides me." It's
simple. She is laying out the facts. She did horrible things and didn't want you to feel sorry for her.
Lilith was a witch who blamed herself constantly, but who would easily tell her entire life story so
that someone else wouldn't blame themselves.

It's kindness.

You look at the light balls. Digesting. She has probably spoken to you now more than she has since
the day you arrived. She told you her story. She gave you the nuances and details whose absence
bothered you so much.

And now a lot of it seems to make sense. The indifference, or the supposed indifference around
people who clearly wanted her around. The terror of causing pain to other people. Even some
aspects of the friendship with Hooty.

It was unusual for people to analyze each other at such a deep level as you did.

"You don't think you deserve it...Any of this." You have no idea how the words come out of your
mouth, your head is miles away from there. But they do come out, and Lilith's wide-eyed eyes are
your answer. You have just hit a point. You had been thinking this for a while and now, faced with
her narrative, it's almost a certainty for you. "Eda's forgiveness. Her friendship...Or anyone's
friendship... That's why you always seem so distant, isn't it?" The witch opens and closes her
mouth a few times. Static. She certainly didn't expect you to be analyzing her so sharply and you
feel your ears burn for that.

"I'm not a good person, Y/N." She is not asking. She is saying. "You're right. I don't think I deserve
to be here. I guess I would have preferred Edalyn to yell and throw me through the doors of the
emperor's castle to face my own shit or just have killed me that day...The Titan knows she could."
Something stirs under your skin and your eyes widen at her use of a bad word.

Just the prospect of it. Your hair stands up in dread and you don't even begin to understand why.

The thought of her dead...Terrifies you...A lot. The thought of her under the emperor's clutches
again almost terrifies you more.

"But she took me in...Treated me like family." The witch curls her legs against her chest tighter.
The self-loathing waves seem quite firm now. You have to make her stop or this may go down
paths you don't want to.

You can feel a bitterness beginning to build in the back of your throat.

"May I offer my opinion?" It's a low question and yet it makes Lilith's attention turn to you. As
well as Riven's. It takes everything in you not to wipe the remnants of tears from her eyes with your
thumbs.

"I just opened up like an oyster here. Please." You would have smiled. But the moment didn't call
for a smile. The moment called for what you were thinking.

"I understand you've made mistakes." Lilith rolls her eyes at the obviousness of your words but
doesn't object before you proceed. "You were a child who didn't understand the consequences of
your own actions. You don't deserve to punish yourself for that forever, especially since you tried
to undo what you did, you regretted it." She follows your reasoning with explicit disbelief on her
face. "About your actions in the present. I believe you were desperate. You were so afraid of losing
Eda that you didn't care to do anything to try to save her. Perhaps a little bit of resentment was still
bubbling up in you, for the past and even the present, but you love Eda and I don't think you
wanted to lose her at all." She widens her eyes for a long moment this time. Probably still a little
surprised at how you were analyzing her in such an incisive way. "I don't think you're a bad
person." She wheezes through her nose and it reminds you a lot of Eda. Irony and quiet sarcasm.
They truly are sisters.

"There's a reason even my parents couldn't stand me, Y/N." It's your turn to roll your eyes, hard
enough so that they could get stuck behind your eye sockets. Stubbornness hits your head
repeatedly.

"I am here and I can assure you that I am not standing you. I like you." It was an impulse. Holy shit
of course it was. A very badly calculated impulse of words. And when she looks at you with her
eyes completely wide open, the blush quite evident on her cheeks, you feel your ears catch fire. It's
time to fix that, in a way that doesn't seem too awkward. "Hmm...You...You're intelligent to the
point of being intimidating, you have an acid kind of humor that you don't show a lot, and you're
kind. It's nice to talk to you." It sounded much better in your head, but it seemed enough to fix this
embarrassing situation that you've wrapped the two of you.

Her eyebrows pronounced.

"Kind?" The word sounds strange on her tongue. As if she has never heard it spoken in her
direction before. What you consider might be reasonable.

"You saved me." From more things than just a demon in a market, if you were honest with
yourself. "You have been distancing yourself from people who clearly want to involve you in their
family because you believe it's best for them to stay away from you. You are kind, Lilith." She
looks stunned by this for a moment. Riven looks curiously from you to her several times. It's
instinctive when you rub the raven's head gently.

You let her digest it...for long minutes. She doesn't seem to believe your words pretty much, even
though you have put together the most logical reasoning possible.

"I really don't know what to do with that." It's the way her voice sounds so vulnerable. She doesn't
know what to do. The steel lady. The woman with few words and a calculated smile doesn't know
what to do with the idea that maybe she wasn't horrible and deserved better than to just whine for
the rest of her life. You move close enough to rub her shoulder with yours, pushing lightly. Her
skin is warm even in the face of the cold night.

"Let it in. You don't have to sacrifice the rest of your life for your mistakes." Her eyes go to you
again and what you see there is pure doubt. Should she? Should she listen to you? Could it be that
you weren't talking rubbish? "Lilith...You deserve a life too." And it's like hitting her with another
punch. She doesn't have to penance herself for the rest of her days. She can make the best of this
life, she just has to try, she just has to let it in. She opens her mouth, but nothing comes out, so she
closes it again. Confusion. Worry. Disbelief and finally...Hope. It's like seeing that specter again.
It's like drowning in so many emotions that she is exhibiting again. It's like drowning in her, in that
enigma, again and again.

"How can you be so young and talk so nicely about these things?" You didn't consider yourself that
young. Your knee already made noise when you bent and you could no longer wake up early the
next day if you slept past midnight.

"Let's just say I also share some parent traumas." Now it's pure curiosity that shines on her face, as
well as on Riven's when they both look at you. You could swear the green gleam in their eyes is
the same. Something tells you that the palismen have an extremely strong connection to their
witches.

"You...Would you like to tell me?" Well...You thought that was fair. She had told you her whole
life and solved many of the doubts you had. It was only fair that she knew a little more about you.

"The day I fell into this world...I had just become homeless." Lilith frowns, asking you to proceed
without needing words spoken. "My parents are exceptionally religious people. They saw a picture
of me kissing a girl. Then they put my stuff in a backpack and kicked me out of the house." Her
eyebrows rise on her face in a silent "wow" as you shrug.

"Oh." Apparently, it wasn't just you with expressions that even a three-year-old would say better.
"Is that a problem in your world?" You frown at her, compressing your lips. The thought almost
makes you chuckle.

"What? Kicking your kids out of home?" You understand the question, but your dark humor hasn't
stopped itself from making an appearance.

Lilith rolls her eyes before speaking again.

"No. Kissing girls." It shouldn't, but just the way she says simply, kissing girls, makes your heart
beat fast again. Kissing girls. Just that. It sounds so common to hear that you have to hold your
tongue behind your teeth not to ask.

She's making you think of her and your parents at the same time, which should be two opposites.
The people who kicked you out, the person who accepted you. The big issue is that now that you
think about them, maybe for the first time in a while, what you feel is indifference. A petty and
profound indifference.

"In my world...Well, we've had darker times but it's still a conservative society, both by religion
and ancient taboos, that believes men should only have romantic relationships with women and
vice versa." Lilith makes a funny face at this, twisting her black-colored lips as well as her nose.

"I don't think we've ever had anything quite like that here. People in the boiling isles...They love
people. No matter who they are." You follow this with interest. Love people, not women, men,
people. It sounds nice to you. It makes your cheeks want to warm up at the possibilities too. But it
sounds good.

"Are you all pansexual then?" You have absolutely no idea if all the gender and sexuality issues
apply in the witch world. But apparently, it does, because Lilith knew the word.

"I wouldn't say that. Some people prefer one gender or another, but sexuality isn't exactly an issue,
you know? No one here is going to get kicked out for kissing a girl. Possibly in more conservative
families which have created rules for themselves but not for religion or social taboos." Your tongue
itches to ask if she has a preference, but you thought that would be too invasive, so you just looked
at the light globes, slowly getting lost on the horizon. The sun would soon be up. You really should
try to get a few hours of sleep.

"It would have been nice...Growing up here." You didn't mean for it to sound melancholy, but it
did. It would have been nice to grow up in a place where you hadn't been forced to create trauma.

"It's not a bed of roses. We still live under a dictatorship and have boiling rain, as well as other
plagues." You raise an eyebrow in amused disbelief. As if boiling isles were still better. Which,
you can't help but notice, perhaps they actually were.

"Well..." She jokingly pushes your shoulders as she realizes what you were going to say. You
chuckle at this. She lets out a giggle as well, her eyes lighting up at the corners. Something expands
in your chest at being able to mitigate some of her melancholy.

"I'm sorry for almost killing you." You frown for a moment, you had almost forgotten that little
detail. Then she really knew. You look at her out of the corner of your eye. Had Eda told her
everything? About the necklace? About the courtship? Did she have some kind of control over her
beast form or was that simply the raven beast acting up?

You think so because there is a vague shade of pink spreading around her cheeks, as well as
through her pointed ears as she tilts her head to the side. It doesn't feel like the kind of shame for
almost killing someone, more like the kind of shame for uncontrollable urges. The kind of shame
you would feel for an irrepressible kiss. You're thankful that your ears can be hidden by your hair
because she would realize your shame so much easier if they were like hers.

"Don't worry, no scratches this time." You hold out your arms and hands, as if for proof. She just
twitches the corner of her mouth, her mind still a few miles away.

You don't think it's a big thing, really.

Okay, keep telling yourself that until you believe it and pretend you haven't gone into complete
ecstasy and dread at the possibility that your crush was reciprocated, even if in her bestial version.

Still, this is not something you are going to address directly with her. Experience and your own
conscience tell you that this is not the way to run things with Lilith most of the time. Gentle
approaches were the key, letting her approach was the key. "So, you didn't tell me about the hair..."
It's a petty attempt to change the topic, for your own mental health.

Lilith looks at you in total disbelief as she narrows her eyes.

"Seriously? I just told you my life story and you bring back the hair issue?" Her indignant manner
makes a loud laugh come out of your mouth. One that was sure heard if there was anyone awake.
Hooty probably heard it.

"I'm just curious. You had a beautiful hair color and it was curly. Stunning." It was your turn to
make her embarrassed with compliments. Her ears look quite red now as she looks down at her
own hands.

"It's not the kind of look you see in the Emperor's Coven, especially for the leader of the coven,
very placid, supple...And I guess I've just gotten used to my own image." Something tells you that
this was the result of external and hateful pressure. She was just a little girl and they turned her into
this woman before you. Often impenetrable, a steel wall with interactions. Your hatred for the
emperor grows a little more. Because he used her. You feel it in your bones. He used that little girl
who had no one, he gave her a place, something she probably abhorred today, but he gave her that
place, that validation she wanted with everything she had within her.

But along the way, he destroyed her, almost to the point of non-reversal. You make a mental note
that if you ever get the chance, you will kick him in the balls.

"I like the black hair..." It's almost impossible for you to resist the urge to lift your fingers and trace
the dark strands with your fingertips, it looks so soft and silky. It's a pretty recurring thought now.
"But if you want to go back to the red hair...Redheads rule, okay?" She smiles at you now. Not the
calculated smile, not the slightly wider one, it's a smile that fills her face, teeth and all. Lips colored
black, teeth white and straight, the dimples accentuating her cheeks. She looked perfect when she
smiled like that, almost childishly happy.

Your heart was beating so fast you felt it in your ears.

It was the first time you saw Lilith smiling like that and you decided it would be your mission to
make her smile with that joy every chance you got.

A blue butterfly lands on one of the bricks in the tower and your mind immediately makes the
connection to Life is Strange. This action will have consequences. Ah, you were a nerd with great
references, it's a shame she didn't understand much of them.

"Okay." The night air pushes your hair away and for some reason, a very specific song comes into
your head.

What could you possibly say? You were passionate about music. There was always a song for a
certain moment. There was always a melody and a lyric running through your head, even if you
didn't realize it. In the human world, if you weren't nosing around in a book, you were playing the
guitar, those were the things that always distracted your head. That's why you reach for your phone
in your back pocket. Lilith follows the movement with the corner of her eyes, interested.

You go through the playlist until you find that one. Stone by Jaymes Young.

The music begins its gentle chords. Lilith and Riven tilt their heads. Her ears move adorably, back
and forth with the intrusive sound. She's paying attention to the lyrics, you notice. Curious, which
you can't help but find adorable. It's a melancholy lyric...But beautiful. Perhaps pretty much like
her.

Perhaps that's why you thought of this song in the first place.

The chorus is what makes her look at you again, eyes shining in the impressive night. She sees
meaning in it, she identifies with the song. She thinks the song is beautiful. I'll be the stone that you
need me to be. You didn't intend it to fit so well. But the song surprisingly suits your dialogue, the
moment you are sharing. To this connection that you didn't expect to have with this witch, but that
now you would do anything to keep.

She grins again. That smile that makes your stomach feel silly, her ears with that slight pinkish
hue.

You bow your head and just breathe in the night air.

You weren't sleepy yet, and you would love to show her other songs. If she would just keep
smiling like that at you.
 And for a moment that's it.

It's you. It's her. It's night giving way to day. It's lovely songs from your 3 am playlist. And it's that
smile that won't leave your head, possibly ever.

It's a perfect certainty that your life would never be better on Mars, but maybe on the boiling isles.
Who knows. At least it's not Arcadia Bay. At least you don't have to choose between a city and her.
You have the realization that you would let Arcadia Bay go to hell to see her smiling like that. To
save her, the parts she's proud of and the parts she's not. Without even a second thought.

Chapter End Notes

No they won't.
 Chapter 8
Chapter Summary

The one where everyone has a Moonlight Conjuring

Well almost everyone

You've lost track of time after the first month. To be frank, you stopped counting the days. The
Owl House was the place where you lived now, as a witch's apprentice and a friend of those
people. You didn't use to count the days anymore because little by little the boiling isles began to
seem more like your permanent habitat. Not that you like to think about it a lot. You had a life in
the human world, not that it was an extraordinary life, but it was still a life. And then a portal sucks
you in, you fall into this strange world, you make real friends for the first time in a long time...You
fall in love...With a lot of things. And that's it? Well, yes.

You loved Luz's company, your little sister, who always seemed to have something new to tell you
or teach you, last time it was a very interesting invisibility spell. She also always asks you for
advice, which is kind of ironic considering your current situation. Eda is like an older sister who
constantly acted like a mother and had the best jokes. You felt sometimes that you were more adult
than she was, but it was just part of her personality. King, half cat, half boy, half-demon, a younger
brother with an obsession with grandeur and a desire to rule the world. Hooty, perhaps a very close
friend who lived in your house and was sometimes a bit intrusive but understanding, the best
listener in the house.

And Lilith. The woman who just by looking at you can make you unsteady enough to trip on the
stairs. The woman who constantly makes you blush at the smallest things. The woman whose
smell you knew by heart, as well as the tone of her voice and the exact color of each of her eyes.

The woman who, after the night of the raven beast attack, every time she sat down next to you on
the sofa, made all the other residents of the Owl House look at each other and raise their eyebrows.
Something that became quite constant.

Back in the human world, you didn't have many friends. Let alone intense relationships, the most
exciting thing was the prospect of getting caught. Your first time was awful, and the sex after that
was just okay. You didn't date, you didn't want to date, you saw no point in tying yourself to
someone you didn't have the slightest affection or care for.

She is completely different from that. Completely on so many levels. She makes your skin crawl
with just the mere touch. She smiles and your heart beats so hard you think you might run out of
air. Lilith is like an outlier. You've tried to understand her for weeks, digging deep into the layers
she wanted no one in, she intrigued you and still intrigues you in a way. But you don't just find her
intriguing or beautiful. You understand her now, for the most part, you know what she carries
under her skin, it arouses your care, it arouses your affection around her.

You just want to be her friend if you could never be anything else. For the reason she is an
extraordinary witch who deserves to have the best life she can, even if she doesn't think so. This is
more than a school crush. Absolutely. You like her, you can assume this for yourself. You have
learned to appreciate the raven lady in numerous aspects and didn't know exactly what to do with
it.
All of them though. They were slowly filling holes that you didn't know existed inside you. Day
after day it's like having a place in the world when you think about the Owl House and what you're
doing there. You may not have a place in your house, but here you did, they all appreciated your
company and didn't want you to change.

Not really.

"Y/N!" Luz shouts from upstairs and you frown over the refrigerator. You were helping Eda
remove the chocolate peanut candy you two made. After your chocolate cake, the Owl House
residents began to have a great appreciation for chocolate and sweet things in general, you were
trying a new recipe to see if you could get the snickers consistency. You also tried to make
marshmallows this time and would have to check their consistency soon. The girl appears at the
kitchen entrance with her backpack on her back and you and Eda smile in almost the same way.

It's the moonlight conjuring. It's slumber party day at friends' houses to animate an inanimate
object. That's why Luz seems so excited.

"I'm leaving...Are you sure you don't want to come with us?" As much as you thought the idea was
adorable, you were a little old for a slumber party with 14 to 15-year-old teenagers. As curious as
you were about Willow's house or what Amity and Luz's interactions would be like, you would
have to reserve that for another time.

"I will stay, but I hope you have a great time." Luz leans in to quickly hug the owl lady's hips who
just ruffles her hair and then she leans in to kiss your cheek.

"I'll tell you all about it when I come back ." She whispers in your ear and you offer a complicit
little wink to her. You would love to hear it all, teenage dramas, so entertaining.

"Stay out of trouble, kiddo." Luz nods, a wide smile that Eda responds to with narrowed eyes.
Something tells you that there have been a number of chaotic situations when Luz leaves the house.
"You can take Owlbert, I won't need him today." This makes Luz's eyes light up even more and she
is smiling widely when Eda gestures and the staff appears in her hands. "Just don't do anything I
wouldn't do." Luz raises her eyebrows at that.

"You know, that doesn't quite restrict my options." The owl lady chuckles before giving the girl a
loving flick on the head.

"Have fun, Luz." Luz waves to you before go running through the kitchen door, riding Owlbert as
soon as she reached the shore.

Again, you would always wonder how she and Eda could not be related. The behavior similarities
were almost uncanny. You also wonder if you will ever be able to fly like that, so effortlessly. You
hope so, it would be nice to fly with Lilith again.

"So what's the name of that again?" It's the woman's question as she breaks off the chocolate
pieces, the consistency had turned out good. Making candy in the boiling isles could be a challenge
but you particularly liked the result of this one.

"S'mores. Crackers, chocolate, and marshmallow. Usually roasted over a campfire. It tastes much
better roasted over a campfire." Eda raises her eyebrows just for a second before nodding. You
check the consistency of the marshmallows next, they had turned out decent.

"Luz went out. We could have our own moonlight conjuring." It's your turn to raise your eyebrows
at the witch.
"Do you want to bring something inanimate to life?" Edalyn laughs this time, shaking her head
negatively as she runs her tongue over the chocolate around her fingers.

"We can light a fire outside to test your recipe. Tell stories or just look at the moon. It's going to be
impressive today." It wasn't a bad idea. A bonfire party at the Owl House. It made more sense than
you could say.

"We call it a bonfire party in the human world." Eda leans against the counter, her arms crossed
over her belly as she looks at you. You wonder what she could have been thinking when she smiled
like that, the golden fang emerging from her red-colored lips, almost too mischievous.

Something vibrate in your spine at that look, because it seemed like the owl lady was planning
something and you had no idea whether that was good or not.

(...)

The moon. The moon seemed to be so close to the house that night, brighter than you have ever
seen in the human world, surrounded by a faint blue aura, your eyes are filling with the silvery
glow as soon as you take a step out of the Owl House.

The whole clearing is perfectly illuminated as if the rays of light were working like small lanterns
over the place, the trees seem redder, even the air seems lighter, more enchanted, and the ocean on
the shore on the other side has the color of champagne. It would be a perfect night for one of your
fantasy books. You can almost imagine Rhysand and Feyre flying in that light, diving into the
golden sea as if there were nothing else in the world.

You take a deep breath and keep this image, this landscape, in your head because it's probably one
of the most beautiful you have ever seen.

Hooty's helping Lilith to bring wood from a pretty tall tree near the clearing. He can't get many
sticks at once with his beak, so you come closer to help.

She is wearing a gray, turtleneck sweater, which goes exceptionally well with her skin, as well as
tailored pants and boots. She has an enviable sense of style, you think to yourself. She could
possibly impersonate a lawyer or a teacher adequately with those clothes in your world.

You don't ask because this is not exactly the way to act with Lilith. You just reach out to pick up
most of the sticks she got and pass them into your own arms. Her eyes widen at the sudden
presence, but then soften when she realizes it's you, a small smile appearing at the corner of her
mouth.

"Thank you." You just nod and start your way back to the middle of the clearing where Eda
intended to build the fire. Lilith turns to get more sticks with Hooty.

You gather a large amount between two logs carved as benches, gathering them into a pile that
forms a nice fire.

"Would you like to do the honors?" She asks as Hooty places the last one on top and you frown at
that. But you understand as soon as she holds out a piece of paper to you with a fire glyph drawn on
it. Your smile slowly takes over your mouth and you kneel down to touch the paper just below the
sticks. First, the tingling sensation in your hands spreads to your arm, then the symbol glows
golden before becoming a reasonably sized flame.

The wood begins to burn and the smell anesthetizes your mind.
"Hoot. Hoot. Warm." You stroke just below Hooty's beak unconsciously.

"HEY. A little help here?" The three of you look at the door in time to see Eda coming out with a
tray on top of another, some skewers, something slung over her shoulder, and King between her
feet.

You rush to her aid. Lilith takes one of the trays, Hooty the skewers, and you take the thing she has
on her shoulder. It's quite light and is wrapped in a black bag, which relieves you, by the weight, it
could not be a body.

"Whose idea was it to stick us out here to talk? Couldn't we do that on the couch in the living
room?" That's what King said as he sat down on one of the benches, extending his paws into the
fire.

"It was my idea, buzzkill. Shhh." You chuckled at that before sitting down on the other bench.
Lilith sat down next to you, placing the tray of s'mores there. Hooty immediately started sniffing
the candy, which earned him a crossed look from the witch.

"Okay do we have everything here?" The owl lady asked as she looked around, sitting down next
to King and warming her hands for a brief second.

"Hmm...What's this?" You showed her the package and Eda raised her eyes to you. It's not your
imagination when her amber eye glows in a pretty meaningful gold while the gray became almost
silver. Your conscience says this indicates something, you really hope it's not a sign of a body.

"That's for you. I went through my junk rooms. Luz said you would like it." You frown, even more,
the owl lady is grinning in an almost feline way now. Your fingers open the package and surprise
settles on your face when you realize it's a guitar. Clearly, coming from your world, a teenage's
guitar, it's light brown, there are Nirvana and My Chemical Romance stickers nailed on, some
really cute patches and there is a capo attached to the neck. The one you used to have at home was
all black and a lot more practical, but this is something you can easily work on.

Your head lifts to Eda and your smile must look quite childish now.

"Thank you, Eda." You would have to thank Luz later. You don't even remember when you
mentioned you played the guitar, but this is a pretty special gift. Your fingers almost itch after
weeks of not playing strings. You played every day before, calmed your mind like nothing but
books could, and the prospect of getting back...It fills your chest.

"Go ahead." Your eyes move to the woman next to you, Eda is stuffing s'mores into her skewer, so
she does the same before looking at her sister on the other side of the fire. "She has a beautiful
voice, ask her to sing." You roll your eyes, but your ears are getting hot again and it wasn't the
campfire's fault.

"Feel free, kid." King didn't seem interested in anything other than the fact that Eda had given him
control over the skewer and Hooty was looking at what Lilith was roasting with anticipation. Well.
You didn't use to sing for an audience, even one composed of two people. You've never performed
in church and didn't even play for your parents, not that they wanted to hear it anyway. But they
are the Clawthorne sisters.

Eda is the kindest woman you have ever met. She welcomed you into her home as if you were part
of the family, took you in, and accepted you as no one has ever done before. And Lilith...Lilith
saved you, again, echoes in your head, in more ways than you could say.
You would never deny them anything...You would never deny her anything.

Your ear is still entirely used to the sound of the strings, it's easy to tune the guitar, even if it
doesn't seem to be played for a long long time. It doesn't take more than a few minutes, but by the
time you're done, Hooty and King's faces are dirty with chocolate. This makes you chuckle.

You rest the guitar on your thigh, testing the strings. Lilith has her chin resting on her hand, she
looks at you expectantly, and you'd be lying if you said those eyes half-lit by the flickering orange
light of the campfire didn't make everything in you shiver and curl under your skin. Eda is leaning
back against the bench, but she still follows you with her eyes, it's interest that shines there.

"So what kind of music do you like?" You had a clue on the roof that night. She preferred Novo
Amor, Clairo, The 1975, Lord Huron. Indie stuff mostly. Lilith Clawthorne surprisingly was more
of an indie girl than a metal girl, she found the Foo Fighters songs too heavy and odd.

"ELECTRONIC!" You have no idea what the boiling isles' electronic is like, but cool that Hooty
liked it.

"Can you charm thousands with music like the mermaids?" You just deny with your head to King
and he lets out a frustrated sigh.

"I would listen to something about the night." Eda's looking at the golden balls in the sky and the
bright moon as she says this.

With that you look at Lilith again, waiting. She compresses her lips as she looks at you, as if in
deliberation. You have to avoid the urge to press your eyebrows together to wonder what she is
thinking.

"Whatever you want." And when she says that, it sounds like velvet. The words seem to caress
your mind and creep into all your pores. Oh, you feel even your thighs trembling, wanting to close.
This is frightening on another kind of level. You almost feel that she is using magic around you
even though you well aware she is not. A slight smile. Her eyes sparkling.

Oh, God. You were so weak around this woman it was laughable.

"Okay." You whisper, more to yourself, more to get back into your own body, and you could swear
you heard Eda let out a muffled giggle.

You focus on the guitar and the strings you have to tighten for this particular song that seems to fit
both of your requests. The roughness is very welcome under your fingers and you almost sigh with
relief. This feels quite like home.

The first few chords come out easily, it's a beautiful song, though quite sad. It seemed that this was
your particular taste. Beautiful things that appeared to be quite sad.

The murmur in the back of your throat is low, just so you know when to start.

"I am not the only traveler." When the first words come out of your mouth, it's like feeling at your
own home again. Music. That was home. "Who has not repaid his debt." You feel it when Eda sits
down again, eyes actually surprised on you. Just as you can feel it when Lilith raises her eyebrows
at her in a silent 'I told you so.' "I've been searching for a trail to follow again." That part really
hits deep, it's not like you're not. You've always been looking for somewhere to follow, and then
the boiling isles appeared before you. "Take me back to the night we met." You met her in broad
daylight, but you don't think that takes away the impact, and that verse was beautiful. "And then I
can tell myself what the hell I'm supposed to do." It's second nature now, there's nothing but the
strings, your voice filling the little clearing, and those people you've begun to consider your
friends. "And then I can tell myself not to ride along with you." You remember the first time you
heard that song, on the alternative radio, when you were driving back from the ice cream shop with
your father. You've always thought it was a melancholy song, a person completely distraught at
being constantly haunted by the ghost of the one they loved. This enchanted you. "I had all and
then most of you some and now none of you.Take me back to the night we met." That always caught
deep in the soul. You can feel the weight of each one of the words in the air when they come out of
your mouth when they hit your little audience. "I don't know what I'm supposed to do haunted by
the ghost of you. Take me back to the night we met." You raise your eyes, the chords were more
manageable now, Eda is so attentive to you it's almost weird. Lilith still keeps her chin resting on
her palm, her eyes seem a little brighter. "When the night was full of terrors. And your eyes were
filled with tears." Just the image makes your heart dive again. " When you had not touched me yet.
Take me back to the night we met." That was her favorite verse, it sounded so good, fill you up so
well. Do you remember the first time she touched you? Your first morning at the Owl House, that
rubbing of shoulders, harsh and firm as steel. She seemed quite pliable around you now, like the
very marshmallow you put in the s'mores. It takes everything in you not to let out a satisfied sigh. "I
had all and then most of you some and now none of you. Take me back to the night we met." If you
could go back, back to that day when you had been kicked out...Would you change anything?
Would you try to beg your mother to let you stay? Would you have run when you heard that noise?
When you look at her...You believe you wouldn't. It was a strange, dangerous, and very chaotic
world. But you wouldn't trade what you had here for anything, even for a ticket to your old home.
"I don't know what I'm supposed to do haunted by the ghost of you. Take me back to the night we
met." You strum the last chords, feeling them slide into the lighted night, vanishing into thin air.
The moment after a song, the world seems a better place now.

"Beautiful." That's what you hear Lilith say. Again it's as if the words caress your mind, your ears
warm just slightly now. Eventually, someday, you would get used to these compliments without
blushing.

"Wow." That was the first thing Eda said, while she was chewing a s'more. "That was intense and
depressing." You tilt your head in agreement as Lilith shakes her head negatively at her sister.
"Now I see why Lily likes you." She barely has time to say that before Lilith plucks a s'more off
the end of her skewer and throws it at her quite hard. Eda deflects and you start laughing, even
though your face is a red mess now. You weren't wrong about the magpie thing. Eda really thought
Lilith liked you, it makes your heart race a little more.

"Shut up, Edalyn." Eda starts laughing too, loudly, in a way that seems to irritate the witch beside
you even more.

"You're already so uptight, and I haven't even started the childhood stories." Lilith's eyes widen,
suddenly really concerned about what her sister was about to say.

"I would love to hear those." The witch at your side narrows her eyes at you and Hooty mimics her
gesture. It only makes you laugh louder.

"Where do I start? Do you remember that one time we were in detention for a week because we put
hair-growing potion in the cafeteria food?" Lilith's eyes are quite menacing on you, so you have to
choke back the laughter.

"You mean that one time you put hair-growing potion in the cafeteria food and I just gave up on
stopping you?" Eda shows her tongue at her and helps King grab another candy before speaking
again.
"The definitions of accomplice are multiple, Lily, pick one and be glad about it." Lilith rolled her
eyes so hard it was impossible not to laugh at that. "What about you, Y/N? Were you more the type
to put the potion on or the type to just sit back and wait for the arrest?" Neither if you were being
honest.

"I was more of the type who was always with the nose in a book or the type who was hit with balls
in the face in pe." Eda wheezes at that.

"Ha! You and Lilith would have been best friends. Right, little sister?" Lilith stares at her with her
best "Really?" look and you try not to chuckle at that as you grab a s'more. You wish you had had a
brother. It would be nice to have a friend to tease like that.

The moon was slowly rising as the Clawthorne sisters argued and King and Hooty gave their
opinions. It was a beautiful night and you couldn't imagine a better place to be. You hear their
stories, childhood memories, many of which involved Eda being a brat and Lilith having to save
her skin or clean up the mess. Once Eda released ghosts in the girl's locker room, the ghostbusters
tried to clean it and opened a door to the ghost dimension which almost swallowed the city. Eda
was holding her stomach from laughing so hard at this one, Lilith chuckled a little because she
remembered some of the horrible puns the ghosts let out. But she only laughed out loud when Eda
remembered the day she cursed the school bells to sing "Since u been conned" for 5 hours straight.
According to Lilith, it was an awful pop song from when they were teenagers, but one that she and
Eda loved. She was wiping the corner of her eyes with that.

An extreme difference between the Clawthorne sisters besides the obvious divergent behavior?
Eda's laugh was infectious, it made you want to laugh along. Lilith's was anesthetizing, it made
your ears go silly and your heart extremely weak.

Stories about Hooty's daily life were also the highlight of the evening, about how he used to have
to kick Lilith out of the Owl House as she kept wanting to take Eda away. He emphasized that he
didn't like to do that. Stories about demons and reigns and lost relatives. You tell some of yours as
well. For example, when you broke the bone in your left arm the summer you turned 6, trying to
climb a very large tree. Eda whistled at that, Lilith just had those interested eyes, as if trying to
understand the healing process of a broken arm.

You also tell them a little bit about your own world, something Lilith seemed exceptionally
interested in by the way she looked at you, with Hooty lying on her shoulder. You tell them about
politics, about history, about culture in general, things that Eda could never know only through
objects she brought from the other world, and things Lilith would never have the chance to know if
not through a human. She seemed fascinated by how much history the human world had and you
were happy to say more, as much as she asked.

"My back is killing me." That's what the owl lady said after you finished your little explanation
about the countries' divisions on earth and how politics was made. She gets up and disappears
inside the house for a few minutes, almost made you think she had gone to sleep and left you there.
However, she soon returns with colorful towels in hand. You help her spread the towels around the
fire and then lie down.

The moon looked even bigger from this angle, so bright, so blue, so silver. And the little light
globes, floating and so peculiar, yet so beautiful. Another landscape that you would keep in your
memory.

It's comical to be lying between two witches, in a checkered towel, with a tube bird on one side,
and a demon on the other. It's like the beginning of a joke, but no, it's just the people who have
taken you in and who you have learned to call friends, perhaps even more than friends.
"You know what's weird?" Your voice sounds perfectly audible, yet a bit muffled by the angle and
the noise of the branches, burning in the fire. You feel it as Lilith props herself up on one elbow to
look at you, but Eda doesn't move, just mutters a faint "Hm-hm." She had her eyes closed. "The
stars in the human world are nothing like those." Lilith tilts her head in a rather adorable way while
her sister again just confirms with a sound from the back of her throat. You think she is almost
asleep. So your eyes focus on the other witch beside you, as they always did.

Beautiful. In this light, she is even more beautiful. In this light, she is almost ethereal. Something
untouchable, something that no one would have the right to touch. Her hair looks silver and even
softer, her skin bathed in moonlight has a slightly bluish hue. And her eyes look so lovely when lit,
green and silver, probably your favorite color combination, slightly crinkled at the corner because
she is smiling at you. The corner of her black-colored lips is smeared with some chocolate and it's
impossible not to find that adorable.

"Tell me about the stars in your world." It's a simple request in that even voice and that chilling
tone. Curiosity and interest, a respectful nerd.

You would never deny her anything, would you?

"In my world...Everything in the universe is stardust. Stars are large spheres made of plasma,
which emit light and are constantly burning thousands and thousands of miles from the earth."
Your eyes watch the little balls of lights and you almost smile at the thought of what it would be
like to have something as hot as a star close by like that. "There are a lot more than here and they
form beautiful designs in the dark sky. Like the Ursa Major, Cassiopeia, Pegasus, and Orion, many
are mythological figures going back to the time of the Greeks...These were always my favorite
because I've always liked connecting the dots with my dad. There are quite complex constellations
just flying around in space out there and..." You look at her again and you frown at what you find
this time. She is completely stunned, alarmed. Wide-eyed. Cheeks flushed. Her pointy ears, red.
She looks so frightened that it makes you wonder if Eda has turned owl beast right beside you. But
no. Everything looks quite normal around you, except her. "Lilith?" And when you say her name
out loud it's like hitting her with a punch, she sits on the towel with her back completely erect,
breathing heavily. You do as well, you really don't understand what the hell is going on, and her
behavior is, to say the least, frightening. "Lilith..." Your eyebrows pronounce even more. What
could you have said? What could have made her so upset like that? Your fingers curl over each
other and before you can stop yourself you reach for her hand, just a light touch, just a rub of your
fingers.

She stands up with the reaction of a shock as if you had pressed a glyph on her skin. Her eyes
widen and your heart begins to beat faster at the possibility that the raven beast is too close to the
surface.

You want to ask her if she is okay, what happened. What made her so out of her own mind. But
you don't get the chance, because the next thing you see is her running into the Owl House. She
doesn't speak. She doesn't scream. She just runs, as if she's running away from her own ghost.

"Lulu!" Hooty exclaims before sliding to go after her.

You pause only for a few seconds trying to digest what you might have said about the stars that
could have offended her. But nothing seems to fit the case.

Your eyes move to Eda then. Her eyes are open now and she's staring at the sky and the moon. The
owl lady sighs deeply, fustration oozing from her pores.

"Crap." That's what she says, before simply sitting down and then getting up to go after her sister.
You and King stare at each other. Neither of you has an answer for this. You wish you could
scream now.

You sink your head between your hands. It should be a fate irony that you had to fall in love with
the most stubborn witch in the boiling isles, but also the most complex.

What the hell were you supposed to do?

It would be a great moment to try to analyze everything again. Since the day you met.

Great. Lord Huron would not help. You take a deep breath and stand up, heavy steps...Towards the
Owl House. Towards her... Ms. I'm gonna fuck with your head.
 Chapter 9
Chapter Summary

The one where reader can't sleep and Lily can't be honest

You tried, for fuck's sake how you did. You hated being ignored, it's just even worse being ignored
by her. You went up those stairs, you knocked on that damn door, but she didn't come out, and
neither did Eda. You called them out and there was no answer, the light was on and you were fully
aware that they were there. They didn't have the decency to give you an explanation for their
behavior, they didn't even have the decency to come out and say "hi, we're alive". Just silence
greeted you, dead calmness and indifference. It's like watching a movie in slow motion, everything
seems extremely quiet, except your own brain that starts to make so many connections and have so
many thoughts at the same time that it makes you dizzy.

You don't think that, in your whole life, you have ever felt so stupid.

Something is so obviously wrong, and she doesn't even want to talk to you. She just...You clench
your fingers in your palms to stop yourself from screaming.

It scratches so deeply into your skin that it's almost like a real bruise. How you hated being
ignored! Yell at me. Tell me what the fuck I did wrong, but don't give me the cold shoulder.

With all the frustration gathered from your misused teenage years, you went back to the clearing,
gathered up the trash, kicked some things into the bags, and took King inside, along with your
newly gotten guitar.

"Do you think Lulu is okay?" Hooty asked as you walked through the door with the empty trays
and folded towels. Your blood boiled a little at that and you took a deep breath. Hooty wasn't to
blame for anything, it wasn't right to take your temper out on other people, or birds.

"I can't tell, Hooty." He did what you would consider a bird's version of a pout.

You didn't sleep that night. Your blood was running too fast, frustration, indignation, worry, and
even a little anger not allowing your mind to calm down enough to sleep. It's just so tremendously
frustrating to see someone you've been developing feelings to lock themselves in another shell and
not be able to do anything about it. You just wanted to get in, you just wanted to help.

And she didn't want.

She...She just didn't want your comfort.

That hurts more than you can really say.

The wisp signs are reverberating inside your head and you feel that it's not a good time to dwell on
that Winter Aid song.

But what could you say? It made sense.

And how I sing you like a song I heard when I was young and buried for a night like this.
You rub your temples. You wiggle on your mattress. But nothing seems to truly work, and you
don't want to listen to music, because with the earphones you can't hear what is happening inside
the house.

Would she kill you if you made Hooty throw you through her window again? You just want an
"I'm fine". You liked her, for the Titan's sake, you wanted to believe that you were at least friends.
You care about her. Could she ever understand that there are people who really care and want her
well? Would she not understand that no matter what she was going through you would do
absolutely everything to hold on? You would do absolutely anything just to be a stone for her
because she deserves someone like that. Your nose itches at that, your eyes water and you have to
stick your head in your pillow to keep from tears.

You got incredibly attached, didn't you? You allowed her in, you allowed her to wrap her hands
around you awfully tightly. Even the raven beast's claws deeply embedded in your flesh.

You let her in, as you never let anyone in. That must be why there is such a great need swirling in
the depths of your being. She had become someone to you, and you couldn't just ignore that.

This wasn't you. It never was. You never had a person you really wanted to have a bond with, but
now you realize that you are that kind of person who gets too attached. You feel too much, so it
shouldn't be a surprise, but it still surprises you how much you need to make sure she's okay.

You didn't hear Lilith's door open all night, so Eda slept with her, which you're sure made you stay
on your mattress all night. Sleepless, but without the courage to go knocking on her door again. But
just as the sunlight began to shine, sneaking in through your window you heard the sound of wood
scraping the floor.

Your muscles were sore, your head was heavy, and your eyes burned so badly that you thought you
might not even be able to build coherent thought.

But still, you got up and opened your bedrom's door.

It wasn't Lilith coming out. It was Eda. It wasn't the person you wanted to interrogate, but already
something.

She was coming down the stairs, still in the clothes she had worn last night, and you didn't think
twice before following her.

"Good morning?" More of a question than a greeting. Eda's eyes almost pop out of her face when
your voice sounds. She looks back and then she relaxes with a sigh.

"Good morning, kid." Her eyes watch your face for a moment, probably lingering on the dark
circles under your eyes and your crumpled face. "Haven't you slept?" She inquires as she walks
down the remainder stairs, heading to the kitchen.

"I haven't." It's a simple answer as you follow her into the room, but it still makes the owl lady turn
around with her eyebrows slightly raised in your direction.

"Nightmares?" She has a slight smile at the corner of her mouth when she asks that, slipping inside
the refrigerator to get her apple blood. You have to avoid the urge to roll your eyes when you sit
down on the counter stool.

"If your sister can be called a nightmare." Eda raises both eyebrows at you this time as she pours
the red liquid into a mug with "MOM #1" etched on the porcelain. She seems genuinely surprised
that you're being sincere, call a spade a spade, so to speak. Maybe it was the lack of energy in your
body, your mental fatigue and your frustration speaking louder than anything else.

"Yeah...Lily can be..." Hard to understand, extremely reserved, incommunicative. Likely to destroy
what little mental health you have left? "Complicated." Completes Eda making you let out a heavy
sigh, leaning your forehead against the cold counter table. You can almost see Eda smiling at this.
You hear her rummaging through the cabinets and then the muffled sound of something being
placed in front of you. It's a bowl with Count Chocula in it. You try to smile at the woman, but it
must come out as a grimace, because she laughs before ruffling your hair.

"If I ask you what happened, would you tell me?" Your question echoes in the empty kitchen, still
receiving the first rays of the morning sun. You stir the cereal in the bowl with your spoon and then
raise your eyes to Eda.

The owl lady has her hip pressed against the sink, one arm under the other, her eyes staring at the
kitchen arc as she takes a generous sip from her mug. You take a single cereal and bring it to your
mouth, chewing and feeling no pleasure in it. Your head is too heavy, even to eat.

"I don't think it's any of my business, Y/N." You frown, but your eyes burn badly at this gesture
and you're forced to stop. Eda takes a deep breath for a moment, taking another sip. She does not
look at you. "As much as I have my own opinions...I can't interfere in my sister's life like this. I'm
sorry." Confusion and weariness must seem quite evident on your face because Eda reaches up to
ruffle your hair once more. "Go to sleep." She seems genuinely concerned about your mental state
and you find that quite touching.

"What if I bribed you? I have a pair of human headphones that I'm not really using." The owl lady
just denied with her head and smiled with the corner of her mouth. She looked a little exhausted as
well.

"Go to sleep, kid. Perhaps you can talk to her later." You have no confidence at all in those words,
not a bit of certainty rests in that "perhaps" but you are drained. Your head is throbbing now and
you feel that if you don't sleep you will end up passing out somewhere in the house. So you grab
your bowl of Count Chocula and start your way to the stairs again.

Heavy, completely drunken steps.

Yet you can still hear Eda grumbling in the kitchen as you leave. The only word your aching brain
understands is "moron".

(...)

You open your eyes, blinking several times to get used to the world you woke up in. Your first
action is to drag your hand through the floor beside you, looking for your cell phone. It's three in
the afternoon. You've had a good day's sleep. But, honestly? You couldn't care less. Your body
feels like a heap of jelly and you just want to stay on your mattress for the rest of your life, which,
considering your headache, might only be the next two minutes.

You close your eyes and sigh deeply. Only then does everything come to your mind. Lilith
running. Your sleepless night. The conversation with Eda that you didn't understand at all. All at
once, which makes you lift your fingers and rub your temples.

Oh, you need to get out of this bed and get your life together. Lying there isn't going to do you
much good. For this reason you force your body to get out of bed and rub your eyes before going to
the bathroom.
"Wow!" You had better days. The dark circles under your eyes seem deeper and your face looks
awfully crumpled. You wash your face and brush your teeth before thinking whether or not you
would go downstairs to the main room of the Owl House and see what people were doing while
you slept.

You couldn't do much upstairs so you decide to go downstairs, your heart sinking a little as you
walk past the door to Lilith's room. You have no idea if she's there, but it's certain reflexes you
can't control. It takes everything in you not to knock on the door again, almost as if something is
pulling your arm toward her room.

Eda was playing cards with King on the main couch. Hooty wasn't around. Let alone Lilith. You sit
down next to the owl lady in a silence that says enough about your current situation. Eda just rubs
your shoulder, conscious of your presence and you sigh before leaning your head against the back
of the couch. It would be a perfect moment for another portal to open and suck you back to earth.

The front door suddenly opens and you open just one eye to see Luz walk through it with a wide
smile and holding Eda's staff in one hand.

You wanted to smile, but it was probably another grimace that appeared on your face. Luz walked
into the room and went to King first, hugging him.

"Who is my world ruler?" She asked as she rubbed his little belly.

"It's me!" He exclaimed as he squirmed in her arms with giggles that would have put a smile on
your face. She went to Eda next, handing her the staff before hugging her around the waist. That
would always make your heart swell. Watching as Eda ruffled Luz's hair with affection shining in
her eyes.

"Hey, Eda." She greeted and the owl lady smiled rather broadly.

"Hey, kiddo. Missed you." Luz offered a little wink to her, but that was really something constantly
going through your mind. Has Eda thought about what would happen if you guys ever found
another portal home? Luz had a mother on earth, a life too, just like you.

She probably thinks about it, possibly hides it from Luz that she is completely terrified by the idea,
but she truly thinks about it.

"Hey, Y/N." She sat down next to you, hugging the side of your waist briefly before looking at
your face. "Wow, did you guys have any energetic parties yesterday?" Well...It was energetic, until
Lilith locked herself in her room as if she'd seen a ghost and you didn't know what to do.

"Kind of." And that's the moment you hear footsteps. Light footsteps coming down the stairs at a
low speed. Your movements up to that moment were quite slow, but now you turn your head so
quickly that you believe you might have dislocated a nerve.

It's her. It's Lilith coming down the stairs. You feel the blood begin to pump faster and your heart
is already starting to sound in your ears. Again. Would it always be like this?

She could disappear, without explanation, ignore you, and you would still feel as if the moon itself
had entered the room as soon as she appeared?

That was pathetic.

But she doesn't even look in your direction. She doesn't even look in anyone's direction. Lilith just
walks into the kitchen, rubbing her forehead with her fingers. You would believe she was oblivious
if there weren't literally four people in that room.

You shouldn't. It's certainly not prudent. But since when do you control your impulses around her?
Isn't that how all this started?

You stand up, not caring about Luz's look behind your back or the slight sigh that Eda lets out.
You simply make your way to the kitchen, to her.

"Lilith. Hi." She is pouring herself a mug of apple blood, with "MOM #2" etched on the porcelain.
You are sure that was Luz's work. She looks up at you, briefly, before continuing to pour the apple
blood, as if she had looked right through you. That doesn't stop you from noticing how she didn't
seem to have slept properly as well, she had light dark circles under her eyes and looked paler than
normal.

"Hi, Y/N." Her voice seems to have lost some of its power. She's tired. You both are incredibly
tired. But just by seeing her...Just recognizing that she is physically okay something loosens up
inside you, relieves itself enough to calm your mind.

It's pathetic. It's pathetic how your body reacts.

"Are you okay?" The question sounds strange on your tongue and is just as strangely received.
Lilith takes a sip from her mug and looks at you over the porcelain. Her eyes sparkle that way
again, like a night bird.

However, this time it doesn't charm you.

It frightens you.

"Why wouldn't I be?" The tone of her voice is so harsh that you feel it like claws, crawling over
your head, pulling, tearing. It chills your bones, a lot more than those screeches you heard in this
house. It's such a sharp answer that you almost walk away. It wasn't indifference, it wasn't the open
Lilith of the past few weeks either. The voice and the words were from a Lilith you didn't know.

It's something bitter, that you weren't sure if you could handle.

"Hm...You left and...You didn't look well." You feel overwhelmed now. Not only because you feel
as if you were a little girl who was left at a movie theater's entrance on the first date, but also
because there is no contraction at all in her face. She is as hard to read as she was on your first day
at the Owl House. Eyes hard as pieces of steel, jaw tight enough to break something, mouth
pressed in a thin line.

"I'm perfectly fine." She moves a little closer, and you walk back a few steps. That pure iron mask
scares you more than her bestial form if you were honest with yourself. You prefer the sharp teeth
and the black eyes because that is honest. It's raw, but it's honest. This is not. She's wearing an
armor dipped in poison, you can almost feel the burning, the acidity splashing in your face. What
did you do? What did you say to make her wear this or come back to this somehow? "And I'd really
appreciate it if you started minding your own business." You shouldn't. It shouldn't hit you as hard
as it did. But it does. Of course it does. She doesn't look at you when she leaves the kitchen, and
you're exceptionally grateful for that because she barely had to finish saying the words for your
eyes to fill with tears.

It was so easy for her, wasn't it? You held back the tears while your mother cursed you and beat
you to get you out of the house. She doesn't need that. She doesn't need fists, she doesn't need bad
words. She just needs a few well-placed words, a sharper look, and she'll tear you to pieces.
Why is it so easy for her? Why is it so easy for her to rip you to shreds?

Perhaps because you thought there was a connection there. The slightest friendship? The slightest
care? But there isn't. You would never treat a friend like that, not even on your worst days.

Your jaw trembles, you are trying with everything you have in you not to shed those tears. You are
not a child. You can take rejection better than that. But when you blink, they fall. Thin and warm,
they run down so easily as your shoulders drop. You offered your friendship, you offered your
care, and she stepped on them, she played and stepped on you. And it's all right. Maybe it's just her.
You almost smile at that, maybe it's just her, right? Maybe it's just her. She doesn't want anyone
around her. She just takes pleasure in watching people come closer, and then she cuts them in half
in the most painful way possible.

You take a few deep breaths, looking up to avoid further tears. The urge to scream seems quite
uncontrollable now. How many times do you have to be punched in the stomach before you learn?
Your stomach turns and you think it's quite possible that you might actually vomit.

Oh that hurts. If your heart used to race just to see her, you believe it's almost stoping now. You
have to stop yourself from wrapping your hand around your wrist, just to check if it's still beating.

It doesn't matter. That's what you want to tell yourself. To hell with her.

You don't need her. You don't need her friendship. To hell with her.

You rub your eyes and wipe the tears away as best you can. You don't know what made her
change, what happened, what the hell you said or did to make her so furious. But it was always
your fault, wasn't it? Not for once it wasn't.

You don't want to go back to the living room. But it's not like you can stay in the kitchen forever.

When you go back into the room, you immediately notice that everyone has listened to your
conversation. Eda offers you the most compassionate eyes possible, her head slightly tilted, almost
in pity. Almost as if to say "I'm sorry about my sister, she's a bastard anyway". King hugs your leg
with his paws for a brief moment before returning to the game. Luz looks extremely confused, so
when she points with her finger to the second floor, you just nod.

You walk up the stairs, a dead silence resting in the Owl House. You don't know if it's any
different inside you.

There are echoes inside you.

Luz pulls you by the hand into her room. You sit on her sleeping bag, the world more in slow
motion than you remember. She begins to change and you look ahead, but you're well aware that
she is perfectly comfortable changing clothes in front of you. She sits down in front of you next,
one leg under the other.

"Care to explain?" You raise an eyebrow at her, the irony exuding from you, which makes Luz
chuckle softly. She rests her chin on her palm and you shrug.

"We had a great night, eating s'mores, telling stories, and then I was talking about the stars on
Earth and Lilith freaked out. She got up and ran off to her room. I tried to go talk to her, but she
wouldn't open the door, and now...Well you...You noticed what a disaster it was." Luz twitches her
lips, as if that voice she had heard brought back more memories than she would have liked.

"I honestly thought you guys would be dating by the end of the month if you want me to be
honest." Your eyebrows frown and your ears begin to warm up again. But now your stomach sinks.
It would have been nice to hear that at a time when you hadn't just been rejected and kicked and
maybe left on the side of a road for a car to drive by with its rear wheel on you. "Seriously you
guys were so cute, talking and looking at each other whenever possible. I had never seen Lilith
blush around anyone but you. I was shippping so bad." A slight smile rises on your lips, but it
could be a grimace as well. You would be lying if you didn't say that you thought at least you two
had a strong enough friendship so she would feel free to say what is bothering her. Instead she
pushed you away so hard that you think you hit your head. "I wonder if she's not on her period."
Well, you had no idea what the witches' period was like, but unless it was something that simply
completely changed their behavior around other people, you don't see how it would end up like
that.

"I have no idea, Luz." You let out a frustrated and rather tired sigh. "Can we just, I don't know, talk
about something else?" Your eyes are filling with tears again, just remembering the way her voice
sounded, how her eyes seemed to go right through your body. You didn't want to cry again so you
breathe deeply as Luz tilts her head towards you before rubbing your shoulder gently.

"I'm sorry." And it's sincere. You see how unhappy she is that you are like this. You would have
loved to have her as a sister. Someone who really cares about your feelings. Someone who
considers before they say anything. Nothing ike her.

"I'm just tired and pretty mad right now, I'll be fine soon enough." She narrows her eyes at you, as
if looking for the lie and you extend your hands up, lightly, demonstrating your supposed
innocence. Only supposed, you'll need some time to get up from that tumble. "Why don't you tell
me about your night?" Almost in the same second a rather infectious smile spread across her lips
and she moved a little closer to lay her head in your lap.

"We ate a lot of junk food. Then we animated a little Gus's action figure which kept talking to us
all night. And..." She makes a lovely expression now, and you immediately know who she's going
to talk about. "Amity sleeps with her hair down." She whispers in a shouted tone. You open your
mouth in a rather dramatic fake surprise.

"Oh...Does she?" Luz confirms with her head repeatedly.

"I wanted to braid her hair, but I don't think she would like it. She always turns so red when I ask to
touch her, and her brother always says she turns red when she's angry." You smile, shaking your
head negatively as you trace Luz's hair with your fingertips. It's soft and short, it curls nicely in
your fingers. Your tongue itches to say that Amity was blushing because she obviously liked her.
But right after Lilith's kick you just wanted to protect her from feeling the same way. God, you
would kill if someone talked to Luz the way Lilith did to you. They would find out together
eventually, assuming things weren't the best way.

"There will certainly be other opportunities." You offer her a complicit wink that Luz receives with
a chuckle. "Thanks for the guitar, by the way." Her eyes light up, pure joy shining in them as she
smiles from ear to ear.

"I'm glad you liked it." You smile back. But everything in your head is how Lilith said "Beautiful"
when you finished playing, in that velvet tone that seemed to caress your brain.

What on earth have you done? If you did something couldn't she just say it like anyone else?

But Lilith is not just anyone else. She is the witch you fell in love with.

That must be why it hurts so much.

Man. You need to get this woman out of your head before you have a breakdown.

"Do you want to help me put together one of Eda's puzzles?" You know she's trying to distract you.
She is also relatively good at reading people, she is well aware that your thoughts are on her,
constantly. That significant smile, with teeth and everything. What have you done? And why do
you keep blaming yourself? Would it never stop?

You think that putting together puzzles is a rather peculiar way of trying to distract someone, but
you nod your head anyway.

Anything. Anything to put you out of your misery. You just hoped the pieces didn't have teeth like
the deck cards.

You just needed to stop thinking about her. That's all. You just needed to get those eyes out of your
head. The voice. The smell. Everything. It couldn't be that hard.

(...)

Well... Harder than you thought.

That day in the kitchen was the last time Lilith spoke with you. It could even be kind of poetic, her
last sentence to you was "And I'd really appreciate it if you started minding your own business."
You really did, even if you couldn't control your own head.

It's not exactly completely ignoring you. It's as if you were complete strangers again. She sits far
enough away in the room to look strange while you both read. She is not alone with you anywhere.
If there is only you in the room she will quickly leave with some poor excuse. She will hide in her
room and avoid coming out for as long as she can. She'll walk past you through the house as if
there were no one there, not only firm and harsh as steel but bitter as rattlesnake venom.

I had all and then most of you some and now none of you.

It's like watching her spectrum again, you are in the darkest part now. The part she hasn't shown
for a while. The part that terrified.

Eda had no explanation for you, the "I must not interfere in my sister's life" philosophy was still
quite active. King was not much help considering he is still a child and told you to give her another
piece of cake that she would surely forgive you. Forgiveness for what was the great question.
Hooty, despite being Lilith's best friend had no answers either. She hadn't changed with him, but
now he had to go to her room if he wanted to talk.

Luz had no idea what was going on. She still had the impression that you were about to become
girlfriends and maybe she collapsed because she is not a commitment witch. Well, it couldn't not
be true, but you doubted that was the reason.

You knew her better than that. Or at least you believed you did. You wanted to believe you did.

The days dragged on slowly. You hadn't noticed until that moment that Lilith was your most
frequent companion. King was constantly missing. Eda had her own duties, for example going out
to other parts of the Demon Realm to look for information about the human portal or hunting. Luz
was at Hexide all morning and part of the afternoon. Hooty well...He is nice, just not the pointy-
eared witch you wanted to talk to.

You've got used pretty quickly to having someone to discuss the books you were reading, or
practice magic or who knows maybe make a stew.
God. You got to the point where you missed her annoyed sighs when she read something she didn't
agree with or couldn't fully understand in one of the books.

Oh, she destroyed you. You're a complete mess. And you can't even blame her. It was you who
went after her, it was you who wanted to understand the woman made of steel, only to have her
turn the blades and cut you in the process. Only for her to pull you deep into that ocean of
bitterness she created around herself.

You started to play the guitar a lot more. It was your way of being able to think without her
constantly in your head, just to concentrate on the strings, the sound, and your voice. It was easier
that way, especially now that you could practice some songs that you hadn't had the time on earth.
Favorite Crime by Olivia Rodrigo was one of the last you picked up the lyrics. Another beautiful
and extremely sad song. So was Astronomy by Conan Gray. But you really loved playing Novo
Amor. It was always these lyrics that made your mind swim a little and kept you from the Lilith
Clawthorne hurricane threatening to swallow you up at any minute.

Practicing magic was another thing to occupy your mind. But it wasn't the same thing without her.

You were practicing "Cold" when you heard a knock on your bedroom door. You usually forgot
that time was passing, so it was not uncommon for Luz to come and call you for dinner or lunch on
weekends. By the brightness outside it's lunch.

"Come in." You say as you set your guitar aside. Luz enters your room with a smile, backpack on
her back, and wearing a rather heavy outfit considering how the weather was that day. "What's
that? Do we have a boiling blizzard coming?" Luz laughed and denied with her head.

"Eda thinks it will be interesting for us to go to the Knee." You frown and point to your own knee,
which makes Luz laugh louder.

"Not that knee. The Titan's knee. It's the place where magic flows most naturally in the boiling
isles." You immediately think about the Moon Nexus from The Dragon Prince. Another geeky
reference. You needed a life, for God's sake. "It's a great place for beginning witches to practice
magic and Eda thinks that now that we have several new glyphs maybe we can do a little research
in the ruins." Luz jumps from one foot to the other as she lets out an excited squeal, which makes
you chuckle a little. "So...Are you coming? "You look around your room as pondering. It looked
more like a bedroom than that place you slept in your first few weeks here. There was a lamp
beside your mattress now, your guitar, notebooks, and a lot of books, plus a trunk for your clothes.
On the ceiling, there were some little Christmas lights that Luz had put up to decorate. You had to
admit it was cute.

You weigh your options delicately.

Staying home the whole weekend without Luz and Eda, and that would be bad enough. But staying
home without both of them, with Ms. I'm Ignoring you and playing relatively depressing music.

Or going on a journey in a very cold place to discover new magic glyphs and practice the ones you
knew, with the two kindest people in the house.

You didn't have to think twice.

"Where do I get a coat like that?" Luz let out another excited squeal before running out into the
corridor, probably in search of another coat.

You smiled a little at this and promised yourself that at least while you were there, you would have
fun with Luz. She wouldn't get inside your head.

She wouldn't dig her claws into you, tearing your skin from the inside out, like she's been doing.
Every fucking day. You would forget her.

Of course. Talk is cheap. You sighed and got up from your mattress. Who were you fooling?
Certainly not her. Certainly not you.

It would have been easier if you had never approached her than to continue to be haunted by the
ghost of that Lilith who no longer seemed to exist. But something curls and scratches and screams
under your skin at this possibility. You can almost feel the cut this time, sliding down your spine,
like one of the raven beast's claws.

Even with everything, your body refuses to reject her. Even with everything... You can't hate her.
How could you hate her, right Conan Gray? She's such an angel. Oh, you're stupid.

Dumbass of the year.

Oh, God. Not even 20 seconds and you were already thinking about her again. What you wouldn't
give for a therapy session.
 Chapter 10
Chapter Summary

The one where reader finally finds out what the hell is going on.

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

The Knee was awfully cold. The kind of cold you had only felt once or twice in your entire life
when you went to visit relatives who lived in Alaska. There was snow everywhere, ruins that stood
up in the white, a giant beast that was chewing on a tree, Eda told you not to worry because it
wouldn't attack if it wasn't provoked. You didn't trust the owl lady particularly about that.
Regardless, you could feel it in the air, the magic, the bond. It was really strong enough for even a
human to feel, the vibrations of power that seemed to emanate from the ground.

It's like feeling sunbeams on your skin, but without the heat. Sounds like a decent definition.

It was lovely, despite the bone-freezing cold.

You set up the tent in a clearing near some ruins. It had a perfect view of the sky, as well as a good
location of the Knee itself.

"Do you think there might be a stone glyph or something?" Luz inquired as she ran her gloved
hands along one of the pilasters stuck in the snow. You wouldn't rule out the idea. There were ice
and fire spells. If there were earth and air spells...Well, you could make an arrow in your head and
play Avatar.

"Eda told us to practice what we have until she returns, and specifically not to come to the ruins
alone." You try to scold Luz, but it's not very effective, considering how weak you were to her
extremely sweet eyes. She's a cinnamon roll.

"C'mon, Y/N. Help me up here." You shake your head negatively and give Luz a leg up. She leans
on your shoulder covered by the black coat and then propels herself upward until she can reach
what would be the roof of the ruin. "Jump." You do so and cling to the end, Luz pulls you up right
after. And damn. It's quite a picture. You can see much of the Knee covered in ice, the city in the
distance, the sun on the way to set, the birds flying to get home, the river coming down the
mountain...

Wait. The river...That flows down the mountain.

"I appeared here...Near that river coming down that mountain." Luz frowns at where you are
pointing, narrowing her eyes to see better.

"Really?" You nod, the river was the same. If you followed its course you would reach the spot
where you were drinking water and subsequently the spot where you woke up, next to the unusual
tree. "LOOK!" You jump in place surprised by how her voice sounded loud enough to scare the
birds. Luz taps her feet beside you with a rather youthful animation.

"What?" You feel a little stupid for asking and then rub your icy, reddened nose. Man, this place
was harsh, your bones would complain about that later.

Luz clearly rolls her eyes at your lack of attention and then points to the floor. Oh. There is
something there. It looks like the tip of a drawing. You both frown at each other before you kneel
down and start rubbing your gloves on the ground to clear the snow so you can see what's there.

It's a drawing embedded in the stone, a half-circle with what looked like a half square inside and a
scribbled piece of another circle, there could be a line too, but it was badly deteriorated by the
snow. It could be something useful if it was complete.

"Stone glyph! Stone glyph!" That doesn't disturb Luz's spirit. Of course not, she pulls the
sketchbook from her pocket and draws what she can with what she can see. "The snow has
deteriorated quite a bit of it, but that's pretty good already, we can try making combinations to see
if we can find how it completes. And then BOOM. Stone glyph!" You smile at that and feel an
incredibly strong urge to ruffle her hair. Why did she have to be so sweet?

"Okay. Now let's get down from here before you break your neck and Eda kills me." You jump to
the floor again and extend your arms. She doesn't even blink before jumping into your arms,
impressive confidence. You grab her and then put her down again.

"I think I saw something quite similar in one of Lilith's books about the boiling isles' relief.
Hopefully, I brought that one." You try. But it's impossible not to feel a certain discomfort at the
mere mention of her. She's miles away from you, at the Owl House, probably reading a book and
being bitter, and you can't help but feel a little betrayed just by hearing her name.

"Where were you guys?" That's what Eda says as soon as you step into the clearing. She had
already returned with the wood sticks for the fire and her eyes narrowed as if you were up to
something. The owl lady certainly had no idea how much she looked like a mother at those
moments.

"I think we found what might be a piece of a stone glyph!" Luz did a little victory dance, which
made the witch's scowl disappear from her face as she pulled the girl's scarf higher to cup her chin.

"Good. Then go get some cans of beans for our dinner, little witch." Luz saluted before running to
the tent. And then Eda's eyes were on you. She gently tilts her head, frowning, as if analyzing your
aura.

"The fresh air has done you good." You frown at that, tempted to ask what she meant. "You know,
staying home all day, playing guitar, and feeling sorry for yourself is not healthy for anyone. Like
teenage dirtbag, really?" You open your mouth, your ears warming up, which is kind of nice
considering the cold exhaling around you. But you have nothing to say, so you close it again as you
sit on a log, crossing your arms under your chest. It was a good song and It's not like you have a
bunch of options, staying in your room was simply better than staying where Lilith could ignore
you more openly. "Sorry, I know I have no right to interfere in your life either." You actually want
Eda to at least be honest with you and tell you what the hell happened. But you were already so
tired of looking for explanations. It was everything you had done since you arrived at the Owl
House. You were looking for answers to why she was so harsh, why she got away from everyone,
why she was afraid of hurting anyone. Well...Fuck.

"Don't worry about that. I don't care anymore." You are a terrible liar, you can barely fool yourself,
how could you fool other people? It still hurts. It still makes you want to drag your teeth under
your own skin. Eda raises both eyebrows in obvious disbelief and she was about to add something,
but Luz came back with the cans and she remained silent. Good. You didn't want to hear about
Lilith. You didn't want anything.
You helped the owl lady to make some soup and as soon as you finished dinner night had fallen, a
much darker night than at the Owl House, with no lights from the house or even the town around,
it was a complete blackout except for the light spells you did around the tent. Eda said you all
should sleep. Creatures in the Knee usually didn't like people awake after curfew. You suspect that
was just another story to make children behave, but, obviously, you don't discuss it.

It's warm in the tent, especially since the three of you are sleeping together. Luz between you and
Eda. It's warm and comfortable and are you sleeping? Obviously not. You were already a night
person before you came to the boiling isles. It only got worse after you came to a world where the
night carries the beasts' noises and the face of a certain witch. Like every night, you wiggle a little
bit, but for Luz's sake, you stick your earphones in your ears until you fainted to sleep.

It works eventually. And when you finally fall into the Morpheus' realms, you dream.

You hear the sound of the river. The trees around you seem a little more colorful than the last time
you were here. But the animals are the same, and the tree that brought you to this place is the
same. Even the ground feels the same under your feet.

The sky is a lovely shade of pink and the wind is blowing deliciously against your face. It's
soothing to be here again. You were so terrified the first time, and now it's almost like coming back
to your roots.

And then you hear the giggle. That same giggle. You turn around, but there's nothing behind you,
or ahead. But you are sure you heard it. Your feet bring you to the edge of the river, and you kneel
before the stream. Your reflection stares back at you, the same eyes, the same hair.

You look pretty. Beautiful and pretty lost.

You watch as your hair becomes jet-black, long and dark except for the one white streak. The eyes
become wider and different colors. Your lips become black.

You're dreaming. This is a dream.

You sigh deeply and turn away. Your head is playing with you.

The giggle is almost in your cheek this time, sweet and refreshing. And when you turn your face,
you are sure you see a girl running out to hide behind a tree.

You run, and run faster to get her. You feel that she is important. You need to know her name. You
need to know what the hell is going on. It echoes inside you, for some reason it's important.

You need to find her.

You need to understand.

You need to wake up.

"Wake up." Luz is shaking your shoulder as you open your eyes, incredibly slowly, trying to get
used to the daylight coming in through the tent, to the cold wind blowing your face. You are more
tired than when you went to bed. "We have to take down the tent. We're going down the hill to go
to a practice space, where Eda and Lilith used to practice." You frown, almost confused about
where you are, and then finally the memories come to you and you rub your eyes, pretty hard. The
knee. Snow. Stone glyph. Soup. Okay. You situate yourself.

"Okay. Just give me about three minutes." Luz chuckled and nodded before leaving the tent.
Maybe about three hours, you think with a sigh, rubbing your frozen nose.

(...)

You and Luz were great friends now. After more than a month at the Owl House, you learned to
like that girl more than you could have predicted. It's so easy to hold a conversation with her, it's so
nice just to be able to talk to someone not enigmatic or masked. She is young, lively, funny, and
extremely sweet.

You talked a lot as you walked along the winding trails, covered with snow and bits of ruins that
might have been a city someday. She told you a little about her mother, about how much she
missed her. You are thankful that she didn't ask about your parents because you think it would be
too harsh to say that you just didn't miss them at all. Perhaps your father, a little bit, but you barely
remembered your mother's existence except when you were judging yourself. She was the expert
on the subject.

You practiced your nature-related spells as you walked down the path. Including Eda. That was
your worst specialty. Eda was good at most of what you saw her doing and Luz could already
make roots twice her size grow, which you found quite impressive.

It was almost lunchtime when you finally reached the spot Eda wanted. It was quite deep in the
Knee. The snow was almost gone and the air here was warmer and breathable, your nose had even
stopped freezing. A large clearing stretched out before you, it's possible to see the sea, a turquoise
blue hue that morning.

But that wasn't what caught your attention...It's the trail that stretches farther away. You were close
now. If you walked another mile probably, you would be at the precise spot. It's just too tempting,
especially after the dream you had, the giggle, the girl. You had to go to that place.

"Can I get some wood for the fire?" It wasn't a lie, but it wasn't the whole truth either. Again, you
should be a lawyer. Luz nodded, she seemed to have just found a completely different plant and
wanted to see if there was a glyph there. Eda raised her eyes at you, almost suspiciously, but
nodded just the same.

You sighed with relief, dropped your backpack on the clearing floor, and ran off into the forest of
red and yellow trees.

It's almost instinct that guides you over vines, through trees, along winding paths. It's faster than
you think, possibly because you're running at the same pace as your heartbeats. You dodge tree
roots and jump over rocks. You almost feel now, in your bones, you are so close. You are so close
to the place where you came from. It's almost like walking home, you know the way even though
you've never been exactly there.

When you hear the sound of the river... You know you are in the place. This is where you woke
up, this is where you felt it was so important to be in that dream, to look for that girl who giggled,
the same giggle from the portal.

You rest your hands on your knees and breathe several times, feeling the blood pumping too fast
through your brain. Boy, you really should start working out because you feel as if your limbs are
going to snap in half and your diaphragm burns with every breath you take. Yet you are in the
place. This is it. This is where you fell into this world. This is where you slept for three days, eating
cocolate bars, before...You take a deep breath and approach the stream to get some water.

You slide your hands together and drink the water next to a small spider beaver, and then you wet
your sweaty, slightly red face. For a moment you are almost certain you will see her face again and
you shake your head negatively as you sit on the edge of the stream. Your coat is heavy on your
shoulders, this part of the forest is a lot warmer, and you feel that you are sweating all over your
body.

You are not sure what you expected. It's just the place you came from. It could be a coincidence, it
could be just any powerful witch playing with portals. It could just be Samhain.

But you feel that it isn't. And in the boiling isles, you learned to trust your senses more than
anything else...Except when it was about...Well...Her.

You cross one leg under the other and then take a deep breath, meditation has never been
something you used to calm your mind but at least breathing you could try. You hear the sounds of
the forest, the trees rustling, the river gurgling, some animals playing among the branches, the
wind rushing around you, blowing your hair away from your face.

Perhaps you have finally lost your mind. You've just left your mentor and her potential mother in a
clearing, and ran into a forest for no apparent reason, just because of a dream, just because you felt
it was important. Perhaps that was it. You have gone mad, you were getting crazier every day. You
are actually still on earth, locked up in some asylum, muttering things about witches, women with
different-colored eyes and spells on pieces of paper.

You sigh and uncross your legs, about to stand up when you actually hear a voice.

"Is that her?" It's a low, incredibly low voice but you can still hear. Good ears. It sounds like a
woman, a young woman. But you are not startled, it would be surprising if you were startled in the
face of so many strange things that have happened to you in the boiling isles. It's just curiosity that
makes you pay attention to the voice, waiting for it to speak again, there was someone here,
creatures, people, you have no idea.

"Shh." Another voice, a little deeper, scolds her. You can almost feel that your ears are moving to
pick up everything around you.

"Do not shush me." The younger voice replies and you open your eyes, almost like an instinct,
there are two individuals there. You weren't crazy...Not that crazy to hear voices.

Well...Perhaps you were. At least that's what you think, you've never studied a lot of things about
psychotic breaks.

"Hmmm...Hello?" Your voice still sounds a little breathless, but audible. Anyone around you
would hear it. So when there is no response, you are sure that these creatures are mocking you.

There is lifeless silence in the forest, just the sound of the river, the wind, even the animals stopped
their noises. You sigh deeply.

"I may be crazy, but I heard you talking. Can you please not insult my intelligence?" Your patience
had its limit. You ran, probably a mile, just to get here. Simply because you thought it was
important. Your legs were burning, the back of your neck was sticking with sweat. You want at
least the decency of an answer, for having come this far.

The silence lasts for long minutes, and you believe that soon Eda and Luz will be worried. You
really needed these creatures to be decent.

It was just at that moment that you heard the young voice again.
"Hello?" And along with the voice, particularly slowly something began to shimmer on the river
water. Something began to form through the sun's rays and the water itself, rising up, smelling of
seaweed, shaping into the body of a woman. She had long, colorful hair and wore a dress that
reminded you of those the Greek goddesses would wear. Young and beautiful.

"A nymph?" The word slips through your mouth before you can even anticipate it. Almost
immediately you remember all the stories you have ever read about these creatures. They are
beautiful, fun, cheerful, and quite naughty. Usually attached to a place in nature, but free spirits.

"Oh yes, it's one of our numerous names. But I'm Sinine." The girl smiles broadly at you before
sitting on the water to be at the same height as your eyes, one leg over the other. Her whole body
seems to be made of magic, there is nothing solid, but you can still see her, you can still talk to her.
Everything is colourful, everything is fluid. A water nymph, a naiad.

"What did I tell you about showing up, Sinine?" The owner of the deeper voice sounds just behind
your head and you turn to see a tree shimmer, shake, and then transform into a woman. Shorter
hair, harsher expressions, covered in green from head to toe. Another nymph, a tree nymph, you
don't remember the specific name of these.

"I guess we owe her, Junniper." The nymph at your side growled in displeasure, something like "I
didn't agree to that" and leaned against a nearby tree, crossing her arms over her dress, same style
as Sinine's, but a lot more solid. She is a lot more solid, overall. "Juno, you can come over." You
watched as the water shimmered again to reveal another girl, with short hair just like Luz's and
slightly shyer eyes. She sat next to Sinine, as if it were the most normal thing in the world, her
hands crossed behind her back. "So...Spill the beans, are you appreciating this world?" The
question makes you frown, incredibly hard.

"I beg your pardon?" You add then because you are not sure if you really understand what she just
asked. Sinine giggles and her laugh is like feeling the tidal wind, funny, soft, and sweet, not salty.
That was the giggle.

"I know the boiling isles can be a thing, but there are entertaining parts as well. Do you like it
here?" She's smiling broadly, dimples accentuating in her shimmering face that seems to rise with
rainbow colors as the sunlight streams through the trees. There is a lot going on in your head right
now, with three nymphs suddenly appearing, so it takes you a little more than a second to realize
that they know you. They know who you are. And there's only one way that's possible.

"Were....Were you the ones who brought me here?" Sinine was about to answer, opening her
mouth while still smiling, but Junniper interrupted her.

"Well, of course. Who else do you think would have brought you. That turd of Belos?" Junniper
doesn't move, but you can tell her expressions are harsh even from your back. You expected all the
nymphs to be extremely cheerful, but apparently, not everything was like in the books.

Should you be mad at them? Probably. But it had been weeks since you had arrived in the Owl
House. You had learned to like the residents, even in the face of the treatment one of them was
currently giving you. If you had met them in the days you spent lost, you might have begged them
to send you back. Now...You are not sure if you really want to. However it's your curiosity pushing
the anger at the lack of respect for your free will.

Why? Why is the main question. Why on earth did 3 nymphs decide to pluck you from the earth
and throw you into the boiling isles?

"You must be wondering why, right?" And Sinine says this with an almost childish smile. She
reminds you a lot of an extremely excited child, full of energy about to mess up the whole house.
You nod your head, almost begging for the answer. Please just tell me. I'm so tired of looking for
explanations for everything. "Well, it's a rather touching story actually. We...Nymphs are quite
gossips, I have to admit." You almost smile at that, because the giggle now seems quite
explanatory.

"I heard a giggle when I fell." You say, almost under your breath, almost not wishing to interrupt
Sinine.

"Oh yes, that was Sinine. She doesn't control her excitement very well." Adds Junniper with a huff,
but when you look at her, she's grinning with the corner of her mouth. The other nymph continues,
however, as if undisturbed.

"So when a woman started coming here every morning, we immediately became interested." You
frown at that, you don't have any clue of where this is going. "She seemed...Miserable, constantly
with her head down, even though the most beautiful things were around her. So lonely, so tragic.
We felt so sorry for her." Sinine pouts, sighing, and looks at Juno who just confirms with her head,
still not looking at you. You can almost see a slightly dark blue hue around the nymph's pointed
ears. You wonder if this is how they show shame. "She seemed like a nice person though. She had
a particularly good aura. And she always did some spells with pieces of paper, something that
made us incredibly shocked, we had never seen spells done through paper. But she did. She would
help some plants grow better and give some seeds to the squirrels." Paper spells. Miserable
woman. It was Lilith. You have to stop yourself from swallowing hard to get used to that. Lilith
used to come here, Lilith used to visit the place where you fell. "We nymphs can walk around the
world, which is probably what kept us off Belos' radar, and we managed to gather a large amount
of titan's blood during the year, enough for us to 'play' in Samhain." You get the sense that the
"play" was something sexual because that blue hue in Juno's ears became more pronounced. "We
usually like to summon the males from the inland forests, they are quite enthusiastic." You frown a
little at how the girl wiggles her eyebrows at you. Well, you were right. "But this year...We...We
decided to help." She leaned a little closer to you, her smile expanding until it reached her colorful
eyes. She looked so excited, so excited that you understood that she would finally tell you...Why
you were here. Why the hell they brought you here. "So we did a spell to bring that witch's mate as
close to her as possible..." Wh...Getting punched wouldn't have made you that dizzy. The words
fall on your ears and you immediately feel your blood running slower and slower. Mat...What?
You try to come back to this world, to what the nymph is saying, and everything seems very
distorted. You believe you might faint. "We knew she would find you because mates usually find
each other easily when they are close enough, even unconsciously." She is talking too much, a lot
more than you can digest. "We had no idea you were human, though, so it was a huge surprise, but
the portal worked the same way, and you..." You raise a hand, she has to stop talking, she has to let
you digest this. Your head is going to explode, any second now.

Mates.

The word echoes.

"Wait..." You feel your blood pressure went down. Fast. Your head is heavy and your breathing
fails. You are not entirely sure you are breathing. "You...Do you mean..." Lilith. Lilith who was no
longer lovely and sensitive. Lilith who ignored you at every possible opportunity, wearing the
mask of steel and poison.

Beautiful.

Tell me about the stars in your world.

 And I'd really appreciate it if you started minding your own business.

"Oh, Titan...Hasn't she figured it out yet? Or hasn't she told you?" It's as if a hole opens up around
you and you fall and fall. The nymph's voice was awfully distant now.

Lilith. Lilith Clawthorne.

She is yours. You are hers.

Uneven Odds.

Mates.

"Lilith and I...Are we mates?" And as the words fall around you, you feel as if a thread runs down
your spine, tugging gently, almost non-existent if you weren't so deep inside yourself, you wouldn't
even feel it. But it's there, gently laid. A golden thread, you think by its weight, stretching down to
the base of your spine and disappearing. It doesn't hurt. It doesn't bother you. It's just...It's unusual.
You have to breathe. You have to come out of this numbness.

You raise your head to face the two nymphs who now look at you with almost compassion in their
eyes.

"Oh poor little thing, you didn't know." No, you didn't.

But she did. She knew. You understand now. You understand how she ran like a threatened fox.
You understand the enigmatic Eda. You understand the steel Lilith.

Oh, Titan.

You're going to fucking kill her.

Chapter End Notes

You may scream now

 Chapter 11
Chapter Summary

The one where reader is a mess

Ah yes but not her fault

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Mates.

The word is still echoing, it seems, inside you. Echoing, playing, climbing all the way up the back
of your neck, and funneling down the thread stretching down your spine.

Mates.

You and Lilith. You and Lilith were mates.

"Oh, my dear. Would you like a little bit of sap water?" Sinine is the one who offers it to you, her
head slightly tilted in your direction with eyes glowing in different colors. You frown at the nymph
and shake your head negatively. You didn't want sap water.

You wanted to scream. Extremely loud.

"Have you two already kissed? I know it's pretty invasive, but I have to ask." Junniper moves closer
only to hit a flick on the naiad's head, her hand passes through the girl's body, but the message was
the same.

"Let the girl breathe. Can't you see she's about to have a collapse?" Collapse. Yeah. That might
well define what you were almost having, but not what you were feeling.

You are clenching your jaw so hard now that you are likely to break it in half. Your breathing is
starting to become irregular. Did she know? Did she know the whole time and didn't tell you? And
Eda?

It feels like there is a huge weight on your back as if you are carrying a lifetime on your shoulders.
You desperately want to vomit.

Why? If she knew... Why didn't she tell you? Why didn't she have the decency to tell you?

Your nose is itching and you feel anger begin to form heated tears in your eyes. You did everything
you could to make her trust you. And still...It wasn't enough.

It would never be enough.

"Thank you." You murmur as you stand, your legs weakening, almost making you fall to your
knees. "But now I must go." Junniper is the one who supports you before you fall, holding you
under your elbows. She smells like a forest and has slightly rough hands.
"You should accept the sap water, girl." You deny it with your head again. You don't need sap
water. You need to go after her, you need to look her in the face and say what is stuck in your
throat, or else you will explode.

"I appreciate that you have been sincere. But now...I absolutely have to go." And you don't look
back. Not for a single second. Because you can't, everything in your head right now is her. That
bitter expression, those hard eyes, those words. She...She...Your fingers curl around themselves and
you have to stop to catch your breath a few times before you follow with your quickened pace.

She omitted it from you.

She didn't want to? Was that it? Well if she didn't want to, she might have the fucking decency to
tell you.

You don't remember the way, you have no idea if you're going in the right direction. It's hard to tell
when you are walking with your eyes blurred with tears, when your heart beats so hard it hurts in
the back of your spine, when your steps are heavy and fast. Everything in your head is her. Her
eyes, green and silver. That smile, that night.

You are so going to punch her in the face as soon as you see her again.

You have no idea how long you've been walking, or running. But when you recognize the clearing
again, you try to breathe more regularly, to keep Eda and Luz from worrying too much. It doesn't
work anyway.

"Y/N?" Luz is the one who reaches you first. She doesn't care that you don't have the sticks you
went to get. She just grabs you and sits down in the nearest log. You must look quite unsteady for
her to do this. Her eyes are injected and extremely worried. It's touching, it's sweet.

"Kid?" Eda appears next. Eyebrows frowned, she looks quite worried as well, she possibly already
was because you took a little longer than would be appropriate just to fetch some sticks.

"Mates." You whisper, your voice sounding awful and extremely dry.

"What?" Luz inquires, but Eda understands, perfectly, because her eyes widen and you can see that
she is tempted to turn away. Almost afraid of what you are about to say.

"Mates. We are mates." The owl lady takes a heavy breath and turns around, which makes Luz
look at her and then at you repeatedly. "Lilith and I." You say next, which makes her eyes widen,
surprise and pure... Enchantment coloring them as she smiled from one ear to the other.

"That...That's amazing, Y/N. AH! The ship has sailed!" You would have laughed or smiled at
that...If you were in your body if your mind wasn't on her.

"You knew it, didn't you?" You try to make your voice not sound too accusatory. Eda is not to
blame for anything, that's between you and Lilith. But you feel that it sounds pretty sharp anyway.
"How long has it been?" You ask next, causing the owl lady to let out a sigh.

"At least since the night she turned into the beast. I had suspicions, you guys were starting to smell
quite similar." You frown at that, but this isn't the time to ask. "But I didn't know for sure until she
told me on the bonfire night and then asked me not to tell you. I guess that's kind of pointless now."
Your jaw tightens again and you are sure your eyes are bloodshot. Of course, she did. Your fingers
fold into a fist. You can't remember anyone ever rousing your temper like that.

She could have been honest. But she wasn't. She hid it. She ignored you. It doesn't hurt now, it just
awakens this red thing inside you that seems to want to destroy the world in front of you. It's an
ugly thing to feel. You tell yourself, it's something people should avoid feeling because it
consumes you from the inside out. But you can't. It chills your bones, it pulls at your insides. You
want to scream and you want to punch the nearest solid thing. She just didn't have the right.

You smell something in your nose and it stinks like blood.

"Can you take me home?" The owl lady's eyes turn to you, silver and gold shining with interest.

"As long as you promise me not to kill my sister." She says this in a serious voice, but there is a
small smile at the corner of her mouth that betrays her. She was hoping you would find out,
keeping that secret should be eating her up inside.

"I promise nothing." Eda laughs, a delicious laugh as she moves her hands in the air and the staff
appears between her fingers.

"Kiddo, I'm going to drop her off at home. I'll be back in 2 seconds to pick you up." She rides her
staff and then gestures for you to hold onto her. You have no problem wrapping your arms around
Eda's waist tightly. There is no discomfort, no shame. Maybe this is what differentiated the two
sisters so much.

For one of them, you had the purest and most delicate friendship possible. For the other. For the
other, you would soon find out.

(...)

Eda stops at the door of the house, Hooty's tube was stretched to one of the windows. He was with
Lilith. Your legs are slightly softer than usual when you leave her staff, but you couldn't be more
active. You had unfinished business that would by no means wait for the next convenient moment.
You are not going to be that little girl who stood crying in the kitchen when her poison spurted out.
She's going to listen to you. She's not going to ignore you, she's not going to be that petty,
completely selfish woman.

"Seriously...Take it easy on her." The owl lady gives you a playful punch on the shoulder, a joyful
smile on the corner of her mouth. However, even though the punch was weak, you feel a slight
imbalance, your vision blurs, and you shake your head negatively until it's relatively back to the
ordinary. No.

"Oh, I will." You find your voice betraying you, it comes out more slurred, more distant than you
would like. Eda shakes her head negatively.

"She didn't mean to..." But she gives up continuing when she notices the look on your face. "I'll get
Luz, please don't kill my only sister." You nod, your corneas really throbbing now, and the owl
lady strokes your shoulder before patting her staff and flying off into the clouds.

You look up to try to keep up, but tiny black spots appear in your vision. Why are there tiny black
spots in your vision? Your eyes return to the Owl House door incredibly slowly, and yet
immediately you feel like a hammering in the back of your skull.

Your fingers grip the doorframe. The pain is like a punch on the back of your neck, burning,
throbbing, tightening your stomach to the point that you feel breakfast building up in your throat.

What? What the hell is happening? Why does it hurt so bad? Where are you going? Focus your
head. Fuck the pain.
Lilith. You have to find her. You need to because she is your mate and she has hidden it from you.
You want to understand, even though you're so tired of trying.

Would you ever be someone indispensable to someone else?

When another twinge tugs at the back of your ear you know you can't take it. You have no idea
what the hell it is, but it hurts, hurts enough for your eyes to blur and your hair to stand on end.
Your head swims in a strange pain that makes you dizzy.

You collapse. Your knees hitting the balcony floor so hard that you think you have torn your pants
and scraped them. The tiny black spots increase in size as the pain is hot, searing, coursing through
your whole body and squeezing your entrails. Like having molten copper running through your
veins.

It's only then that you vomit. The taste is bitter and chilling, your skin curling up on itself with the
horrifying sensation.

Could this be what death felt like?

You rest your forehead against the floor. Your senses don't feel right, everything is spinning, your
breathing is so heavy that you think another vomit is quite possible. But you can't. You rest your
palms on the floor. You have to get up, you have to go talk to her, she is more important than this,
whatever this is. But your fingers are trembling and the tiny black spots take up all your vision.

And when your head turns completely black. It's still her face in your thoughts. And it's still her
name on your lips.

(...)

"I told you not to go too far. You see? This is what happens when you think you are immortal."
Your head is so heavy that you are not sure if it is really your head, it just feels like a mass that you
are carrying on your shoulders. You try to open your eyes, but they hurt, something burning inside
your corneas and forcing you to close them again. But you force them open, you want to see.

Opening your eyes is how the comet storm that killed the dinosaurs must have felt. You feel your
insides turning over again with the intensity of the pain, but there is nothing left in your stomach to
vomit. That doesn't stop that awful bitter taste from rising up your throat.

Eda is here. Luz is here. Oh, that owl-shaped light on the ceiling of the room is so beautiful. It
glows. It shines. It shines extremely like the eyes of a certain mate who didn't want to talk to you
and is blinding you with the intensity, not that you care much right now.

"Lilith." It's the first thing out of your mouth. You don't remember your tongue being so dry or
your voice being so hoarse. Luz and Eda look at you, downward. This would imply that you were
lying on the sofa, probably. You are not sure, you are not sure of anything. But the pain is starting
in the back of your head again, and you need to talk to her before you pass out again. Something is
screaming, scratching, destroying under your skin. Please, just let me talk to her. "I...I need to talk
to Lilith." Your voice becomes more and more lost, the pain is strong enough to make your head
throb and twist. You can't bear to keep your eyes open, so you close them again. "Please."
Education. Be polite and maybe they'll carry you to her room. Maybe they'll at least let you look
her in the face and say some things that were stuck in your throat.

"The only thing you will talk to is a blanket and some nice hot soup." You try to frown at what Eda
is saying, but your body doesn't even want to react to it. Tears begin to accumulate inside your
eyes. What the hell is going on? Just let me talk to her.

But eventually, the spots start to form again.

You want to tell them that it's okay, that you just need to talk to her, that this is what is eating you
up inside.

But they won't listen to you, your heart sinks at that.

They won't listen to you.

You don't know if there are tears streaming down your face. What you do know is that the feeling
of fire in your veins comes back with full force absolutely suddenly. You squirm to avoid it, but it's
not outside, it's inside you. Oh man, it burns. It hurts like hell. You feel your breath catch in your
throat with it. You gasp. Maybe you're finally paying for your sins as your mother would say.

The pain in the back of your head returns. A blow strong enough to blur even behind your eyelids.
You clutch your stomach and again when you blackout...It's Lilith in your head, a green eye, a
silver one, staring at you as you fall into darkness.

(...)

The next time you regain your consciousness, you feel that you are on your mattress, in your room,
you recognize the texture of the blankets around you and the smell is quite familiar. It still hurts.
Everything hurts, you don't even try to move your fingers because you feel the fire coursing
through every nerve in your body, but it feels a little lighter now. You can breathe, even if in a faint
way. But your mind is heavy, your thinking isn't particularly good, and you've possibly had better
days with your stomach.

"Please, Lily. Luz is already asleep." It's Eda's voice. Oh Gosh, has she always spoken this loudly?
Her voice echoes in your head and hits your corneas. It feels like the sound waves are ripping
through your skin, tearing you apart from the inside out. You almost frown, but you believe that
this will eventually give away the fact that you are awake, so you try to remain as still as possible.
"Just stay with her for a few minutes while I go get some more towels." Were you sick? Did you
get sick?

Oh, this is a whole new level of embarrassment. You got sick and now Eda was taking care of you.
Horrible, Y/N.

"Fine." The growl is well known to you. You would recognize her voice anywhere. You can
almost feel it in your bones when she sits on a piece of furniture that you are not sure was in your
room before. It would be the perfect moment to broach that subject.

But what was the subject anyway?

It was something important, wasn't it? It was something you needed to talk to Lilith about. Then
why can't you remember what it is?

Oh. You've never felt so bad in your whole life. You don't want to open your eyes, because she'll
surely see that you're awake, but the thin tears come down anyway. You can hardly remember
what you wanted to say, everything hurts, from the tip of your foot to the top of your head, a hot
pain that spreads through your nerves and squeezes your insides. And you don't know whether you
are crying because it hurts or because you just wanted to remember what was so important. If it
was so important, why can't you remember? What happened to the literature student's brain, with
the quick thinking and considerable memory?
Your chin begins to tremble, your fingers shake in the same rhythm. When did it get this cold? A
shiver runs through your body with enough force to wiggle you on the mattress. You wince,
seeking the warmth of the blankets, your muscles screaming at the gesture.

"Shhh..." It's the touch more than the voice that makes you open your eyes with difficulty. You
have no idea how many hours have passed, but now the room is dark, lit only by light spells, little
light balls that float around you and are making you dizzy but not blinding you like the light owl in
the living room.

You see her eyes first, green and silver, so elegant, so...So different from what you remembered,
they don't look harsh. Not at all, they are safe, they are craving to care. And then you feel her
fingers gently push your seemingly sweaty hair away from your forehead to land her palm there.
And her touch...Her touch is like breathing again. It's comfortable, warm, and her skin is soft,
probably the only good feeling you've had in a few hours, it seems to make the pain in your nerves
recede a little.

"It's okay, your fever is breaking. Eda is great with knee colds. She will heal you." Her voice is not
so audible, just a low, slightly hoarse whisper. You don't know if you ate anything in your
unconscious moments, but you think your stomach is turning again. Lilith takes a towel beside
your head that you can't exactly see and then places it on your forehead. "Everything will be fine."
And it's the way she doesn't sound much like the Lilith you remembered. Her voice is lovely and
her fingers glide delicately across your face, being careful not to scratch you with her nails. She
was furious with you for some reason, wasn't she? Then why isn't she acting like that anymore?

"There. I can manage it now." Eda has returned, you see her shadow on the door, as well as her
voice a little too shrill for your head. Lilith nods a gesture that seems slightly slower to you than it
really should be. She is going. She's getting up. She's leaving, but...

Please.

Before you can better calculate, your hand reaches up and grabs her wrist. Everything inside you
screams and twitches at this gesture, you shouldn't be moving muscles, not when they seem to be
torn with the simplest gesture, but you try to keep the grip. You have no strength, but your fingers
hold loosely around her wrist, just that effort makes your whole body shiver with pain. You frown
at the sensation and Lilith stares at your fingers, frowning as well, but in doubt.

"Stay." It's the only thing your sandpaper-consistent tongue can say. Stay, please. Because even if
you hate me...Something in me wants you here. Just stay. Because it seems like you're the only
thing making my existence less shit. You notice a rather significant exchange of glances between
the Clawthorne sisters that you can't say you understand. It must be a sister's thing.

"You may go to sleep." And you almost sigh with relief when Lilith says that. The tension you
were holding, forcing your shoulders, is gone and your muscles ease a little. She will stay. Your
fingers lose the rest of their stability and her wrist goes. The pain subsides to that burning thing, the
usual.

"Are you sure you can handle this?" The witch's eyes go to you in a slow gesture and you don't
even want to imagine how horrible your face must have looked at that moment. Yet, you can't even
feel shame.

"Who do you think kept you alive during your entire childhood, Edalyn?" Eda chuckles at that, and
you watch her give her sister a knowing pat on the shoulder before handing the towels into her
hands and returning to the door with a long yawn.
"I'll be back in three hours." The owl lady says over her shoulder before closing the door. And
that's it.

Lilith is here. Lilith will make you well again. You have to believe she will.

"What exactly were you and Luz thinking about when climbing into a ruin with probable remnants
of a knee cold?" You frown at that. You have no idea what knee cold is, let alone how you caught
it.

"Is Luz okay?" It's all you can think of as she dips another towel into a liquid that smells like mint
and honey.

"Luz is fine. Apparently, you were born lucky." You close your eyes as she replaces the towel on
your forehead with a warm one, your body shuddering at the temperature difference. You wish you
could have grinned, but you don't think you can do that. "Are you hungry?" You deny with your
head and Lilith makes a rather funny expression, twisting her lips and rolling her eyes. "Well, you
have to eat if you want to get rid of this." You just nod, however, the smell of the towel is getting
into your head and is making it quite heavy again. Your eyes are needing to close.

She is here. That's all that matters.

"I...I'm going to eat." Your voice is even worse than before. "But...Let me close my eyes...For three
seconds." Lilith lets out a slight giggle as she moves your hair away from your face again.

"Sleep then." She didn't have to say it twice. And this time you really do sleep. You don't pass out.

(...)

And...You didn't wake up.

Only darkness greeted you.

You couldn't wake up, and that was the most terrifying feeling you've ever felt. You knew you
were awake inside your head, but you couldn't open your eyes, you couldn't move your limbs. It's
as if you were a spectator inside your own body. It's agony now. You want to wake up. Even if it's
the fifth time in the last half hour. But you can't. You are panting, panting inside your own head if
that makes any sense. Terror spreads through your consciousness. When did everything get this
dark? Is this what death feels like? Please, not dying now. You desperately try to move, to do
something. Please. Is there any way to scream for help mentally?

There is something here.

There's something breathing on you. It's heavy like a wild animal, it's big, much bigger than a bear
or a rhino. You can't remember ever being so frightened, this darkness around you, deep, your own
consciousness, swallowing you up little by little. It chills your bones, it makes you wonder if there
was ever anything good in the world. It hurts in a different way, it's not physical pain, it's
something that eats away at you, that tries to destroy you from the inside. That...That is more than
enough to drive anyone crazy.

You have to wake up. This is just something in your head. You just have to open your eyes.

That's when you hear her voice.

"I've always expected so little from you, but even for you this is too much."
"You're not my daughter anymore."

"You think this is love? That's disgusting."

You shake your head negatively. That sharp voice, that tone. No. There is no way she can be here.
There just isn't. You're far enough away, she must think you're dead, she can't say anything to you
anymore. Nothing. She can't reach you, not anymore.

The animal grows and your hair stands on end more than from hearing the voice of the woman you
once called mother.

You have to run. You have to get out of here. But how are you going to run if you have no legs?
This is your head. Fight with it. It's your head. Nobody should be scaring you in here.

But it scares. It scares a lot. You just want to go home. But...What home?

You curl around yourself. You can feel her. You can feel the thing. It's going to destroy you. Little
by little.

And then you wept. A deep sound from the abysm of your being. Just take me home. Please.

Just get me out of here.

"Close your eyes, I know what you see." And when you hear that. It's different. It's not her. It's
something that makes you breathe again.

Ashes.

You watch the words turn your nightmares to ashes.

She disappears, the growling animal disappears. You are alone in the terrifying darkness.

But the voice is lovely, distant, quite distant, but beautiful. You feel it grabbing you from this
confusing world, this strange feeling, this vertigo inside your own head.

Her voice feels like threads, golden threads that gently wrap themselves around you, holding you
tight.

You feel that they will lead you. Back home. Back to her.

"The darkness is high, and you're in ten feet deep." The voice continues with an elegant singing.
Honey. If her voice had a consistency it would be honey, deep, dense and...Even a little sweet.

It's pushing away the terror around you, this terrifying mass that could easily consume you.

"But we've survived more terrible monsters than sleep." It pulls you back. You are back. The
threads fade slowly, and then you can feel yourself again. You are here again. You feel your limbs
and you would have cried with relief if you didn't know it would alert her.

You don't want to open your eyes, you don't know if this is a dream or if she's really singing for
you.

"And you know I will be here to tell you to breathe." This time you feel the gentle touch across your
forehead, pushing your hair away, testing the temperature. What time is it? How long has she been
here? Has she slept? "So you run, through shadows you roam." Her voice sounds closer now,
heavier. Either you were dreaming or she was singing directly against your cheek, the heat hitting
your skin in warm, long breaths. "Seams undone by the love you thought you could own." Your
sleep is clinging to your bones again just with how soothing her voice is. Even if the cold seems
worse. She's warm, she's here. Why do you still trust her so badly? Why is she the one grabbing
you and pulling you back? "But she's just one of many that you might call home." It's a beautiful
song. And in her voice, it sounds better. She's singing. Maybe to push away what you're feeling.
Maybe to calm you down. "And maybe someday, the bitter will fade from your bones." You have
to look at her. You have to know if this is really happening.

Your eyes open again. You are confused for a moment by the darkness and the slightly light
coming from the spells again. But Lilith is here.

She is close. Incredibly close. Close enough that if you turn your face, your nose will touch hers.
She's lying beside you, singing. Why?

She looks slightly surprised when you look at her, as if she wasn't expecting you to wake up. But
then...She smiles, safe and warm. Your eyes fill with tears, you were furious with her before. And
now that you look her straight in the eye all you want to do is just sob. How can it be like this?
How can she take you over with several feelings at the same time? You're exhausted.

You're simply consumed. And you have no idea whether that exhaustion is physical or mental.

"You're my little soldier." She continues to sing. Extremely slowly, the words sink into your head,
caressing you. And you don't think you can hold on any longer. "The reason I live." You close your
eyes because you're sure the tears are already coming down. Why? Why didn't she tell you? Why
does it hurt? Why couldn't she have been honest? "Don't forget me." She whispers the song now as
her fingers push your tears away, her thumbs brushing your cheeks. And how could you forget her?
You are sure that if you never even saw her face again, you would be haunted by her for the rest of
your life. "I'm watching over you." You don't see. You feel it. Her lips placing a kiss on your
forehead and you shiver, something in your spine shivers in the same way. You are cold and her
lips are warm, delicate, it's quite a contrast now.

"Lilith." Your voice sounds less horrible than before but still husky and low. She's here. She's
caring about you. She's watching over you. Then why the hell didn't she tell you?

"Go back to sleep, Y/N." You want to. But you desperately need an answer. Why? Just tell me
why. Let me rest.

"Can we talk, please?" Your voice breaks halfway. You've had stronger days. And you feel her
sigh against your face almost in the same second.

She's exhausted, just like you.

"When you're all right again and it's not four in the morning, I cross my heart that we'll talk about
whatever you want." You extend your pinky in the air and it's pretty easy to feel the doubt
emanating from her.

"Pinky promise so I know it's true." You are surprised that she can hear the last word because you
yourself did not understand your hoarse voice. She giggles softly but entwines her finger in your
pinky anyway.

"I promise."

You don't remember if you let go of her hand before you went to sleep again.

(...)
This time when you open your eyes nothing turns and the darkness is nowhere to be found. You
still can't breathe properly, and your body has certainly seen better days. But you sit up without any
complication and manage to lift a hand to take towels from your face just the same.

The sun already seems quite high through your bedroom window, and you take a few deep breaths
to get used to this world again before looking around. Your lungs complain a little with the deep
breaths, but you push them anyway. There are many towels around you, as well as bowls with
different things in them, there is a thermometer nearby and some potion bottles. Oh. You looked
like you had been through one of the worst.

It's only then that your eyes meet...Her. She's leaning in a particularly awkward position in an
armchair, which was certainly not in your room before, sleeping. Not the most peaceful of sleeps.
Lilith has pronounced eyebrows and that place is certainly not as comfortable as her nest. But she
stayed there. She stayed with you. The whole night, watching over you. The same woman who told
you to mind your own business and had been avoiding you for days.

She sang for you. She kissed your forehead. She soothed you from what could have been sleep
paralysis.

Lilith has taken care of you and you're not sure how to feel about that.

The door makes a rather distinctive sound as it opens to make room for the owl lady. She tilts her
eyes, watching you and then Lilith sleeping in the armchair before shaking her head negatively and
entering the room.

"Here, kid." You accept as she hands you a bowl of what looked like a peculiar soup, its warmth
warming your cold fingers. "It will make you feel better a lot faster, believe me." You nod, more
than ever wanting your body back. And then you take a spoonful of the soup, it tastes quite like a
human tomato soup. "I tried to trade shifts with her." Eda says as she sits next to you on your
mattress, looking at her sister, still asleep and considerably paler than usual. "But she refused to
leave." She's grinning in a very suggestive way now, the golden fang uncovering, which just makes
you shake your head negatively. It still hurts a little, but not as much as before.

"Did you tell her I know?" The owl lady denies with her head and takes a deep breath before
standing up. You watch her take one of the blankets from your mattress to cover the other witch as
carefully as she could.

"I don't think that's any of my business. You two need to talk." You nodded and then tried to get
up. Your legs didn't fail, which was incredibly good, however, it didn't stop Eda from raising her
eyebrows in silent questioning.

"I need to get some air." It was your reply, so she just agreed and helped you out the door. You
looked at Lilith sleeping one last time before you left.

(...)

You went out for a walk with Eda while eating your tomato soup that wasn't exactly tomato soup. It
was...Refreshing, to say the least. Apparently, you caught a witch disease, called the knee cold,
which is very common in the ruins of the Knee. It quite explains why Eda wanted you to go with
her.

Although when it manifests it strikes quickly and with enormous impetus, causing delirium,
vomiting, excruciating pain, and fever, the disease also goes away quickly and without much
damage. You think that is good, in a way. Eda said that you would probably be in perfect shape by
 the end of the afternoon. And she denied it with her head and rolled her eyes when you thanked
her.

But feeling the morning air was nice, it freed your lungs, took away your pain. You almost felt like
yourself again, even if your mouth was still a little sour and your legs didn't respond the way they
used to.

Eda took you home and then said she was going to the market to buy some things for lunch. But
you think it's just a lame excuse for her not to be there for a dialogue between you and her sister,
now that you were in almost perfect shape and had enough thinking capacity to face her.

You couldn't put it off any longer.

She omitted it from you. She kept it to herself as if it affected only her. She ignored you for days.

But then she took care of you. Will you ever understand Lilith Clawthorne? She could have just
left Eda to take care of you, it's not like you were at your best when you asked her to stay. But no.
She stayed. She watched over you. And she sang you a lullaby while you went through one of the
most terrifying sensations of your entire life.

Could she feel it? Could she tell when you were in pain and that's why she started singing?

How could you hate her, honestly?

You're my little soldier. The reason I live.

Did she sing that to Eda when they were young? The words weigh heavily enough on your
shoulders to make you sigh. You should be angry, shouldn't you? It doesn't matter if you almost
died of an illness and she took care of you. But it does. Because she didn't have to, but she stayed
and made sure you were okay before sleeping in an uncomfortable armchair for a few minutes.

Your shoulders drop as you face the Owl House door and absent Hooty. His tube was stretched out
to one of the windows.

He was with Lilith again. You rub your temples and sigh deeply.

Good. It's not like you can run away now. It's time to stop being a child.

But we've survived more terrible monsters than sleep. And you really had. It's time to stop fearing
the monster of truth and face your mate, to know why on earth she thought it was a good idea to
hide this from you.

You take another breath and this time your lungs work, perfectly. Still, you feel that you are
running a little short of air.

You can't seem to let yourself to leave her and you can't breathe anymore.

Chapter End Notes

Lilith was singing "Soldatino" by Paola Bennet

 Chapter 12
Chapter Summary

The one with "the talk"

You feel that with each step your heart is beating a little faster. It's only a few steps, it's only a few
seconds to her door, and you don't think you're breathing properly anymore.

There is no hesitation when you raise your fist and knock exactly three times on the wood, though.
You've waited too much. It feels pretty different from when you were here, weeks ago, with a
piece of cake. Trying to be friendly. Trying to get her to be more open with you. She was more
open, days later she went back to the steel lady and then she stayed a whole night watching over
you. It's extremely arduous to understand Lilith Clawthorne.

"Edalyn?" It's her voice, doubt evident in her tone. She sounds a little huskier than usual, which
you believe is due to lack of sleep.

"Not Edalyn." Again you try to make your voice not sound too accusatory. You don't know if truly
works.

There is silence for a few long seconds that make you wonder if you are going to knock that door
down with a spell and force her to talk to you. But then you hear her footsteps, slow and light.

When she opens the door you realize that it's probably the first time you've looked her in the eye in
full consciousness since that wonderful day in the kitchen. Something trembles inside you just by
looking into her eyes, you think it might be the thread stretching down your spine, but you're not
sure. She still looks the same, one eye like an emerald, the other like a storm, the jet-black hair, the
pointy ears, the black colored lips.

The first thing different about her is the dark circles under her eyes, slightly marked. You feel a
tiny bit of guilt resting on your shoulders for that. The second thing is that there is no more gentle
gaze, no more lullabies. She has that same hard, frightening look in her eyes that arouses fear in
your center. The same tight jaw. The same expression of one who might swallow your liver any
time soon. The steel lady is back in full force.

She's wearing another pair of pajamas, an Adventure Time shirt, and plaid pants, it tells you that
she intended to sleep the whole afternoon. Which, if you were honest, you were thinking of doing
as well.

"We need to talk." There is no "hi", there is no "hello". You want to sound grown-up, you want to
feel grown-up. And not that scared little girl who is screaming inside you just for staring at the
woman who broke you in half. And not that girl who grabbed her wrist and asked her to stay.

"I'm kind of busy at the moment." You weren't relatively good at controlling expressions, it was
obvious. So when you moisten your upper lip with your tongue, rolling your eyes, you assume the
message is pretty clear.

"Will you stop acting like a child any time soon?" You want to be an adult, that's why you don't go
back to the pinky promise she made you.

You have analyzed her for weeks, you know how to get her to talk to you...If it's in a hostility
mood...Still works.

Lilith snorts through her nose and rolls her eyes before walking away from the door.

"Hootsifer. We can finish your makeup later." Hooty narrows his eyes at you from the window,
before twitching his beak in what would be a pout. He has pink eye shadow over his eyes and
eyeliner. Was she doing Hooty's makeup? You wonder what the occasion was.

"Okay, Lulu. But I need mascara and an illuminator. Don't forget." You can see her smiling even
from her back as Hooty goes out the window, closing it behind him.

Her room hasn't changed at all. The nest, the shiny mobile, the bookcase. Everything seems in its
perfect place.

But something definitely changes when she turns to you and crosses her arms under her chest. It's
like feeling the raven beast walking through the house, the attitude is the same. Just like feeling the
vibrations of the ground before a storm, you can feel the electricity in the air when she looks at you
like this. There is nothing of that woman from last night. No kisses on the forehead, no whispered
songs.

"Well?" She raises her arms for a brief second, an almost mocking smile at the corner of her
mouth. "You have my attention." Yeah. You really do, and it makes you want to scream, as your
eyes prickle with warm tears. You really do have her attention, for the first time in long days.

She knew it. She asked Eda not to tell you. Oh. It hurts. And it boils your blood.

You really wanted to do as your mother did when you told a lie. You wanted to trap her, to be
uncomfortable until she confessed. But, man, you're so tired. So tired of childish behavior. So tired
of the disease that came over you and that you swore was going to kill you. So tired of having to
deal with more than one of Lilith's personalities in a single day.

"We are mates." And when you say that out loud, in front of her. It seems even more true. The
thread in your spine quivers and your heart beats faster. You are mates. The thread coils and plays,
it knows that you're talking about it. You have another shudder, and you can't tell if it is the thread
or simply remnants of your cold.

Lilith...You're watching a storm becoming a summer rain, and then ending completely. The harsh
stare goes away, the tight jaw disappears. She opens and closes her mouth, eyebrows slightly
raised. For the first time since that day...You recognize her again. The steel mask has fallen away
and it's...Just her again. That woman. The woman you knew.

"Was it Eda who told you?" Her voice doesn't have the same power, it sounds pretty much like a
whisper now. It echoes between you. She doesn't even try to deny it, she probably knows it
wouldn't do any good.

"No. The nymphs who brought me into this world told me. But it doesn't matter." And she seems
to think the same because she doesn't even raise her eyes when she hears the word "nymphs". You
take a long breath. "Lilith, we are mates." You repeat, and it's like hitting her with a punch, really
hard. She cringes, wrapping her arms around herself tightly. Your heart seems to be beating on your
head, but you think you're barely breathing.

"Yeah. I know." If there wasn't an almost deafening silence around you, you wouldn't be sure you
could hear her. Just a whisper, that's all.

Your blood boils. Even more. I know. I know you know.

“Is that everything you've got to say? "I know"?" Why do you feel like your heart is falling into
pieces? Why do you feel like you want to cry until your eyes fall out of your face? You're furious.
You want to yell at her, you want to tell her what a bastard she was to you and how it hurt. But all
you feel is pain. It's self-loathing.

"What? What did you expect me to say?" Her voice sounds sharp now. She's trying to attack, a
great way to protect herself. She stares into your eyes, and they look extremely like water mirrors.
You have to bite your tongue to keep from letting out the first curse that comes into your head.

"You let me believe it was my fault." You let me believe that I mattered. Your eyes itch, your nose
itches. You just want to disappear as your stomach sinks. She frowns, almost confused in your
direction. "I thought I did something to upset you and that's why..." That's why you started treating
me like a heartless witch. But it wasn't your fault. It never had been.

You wish you could hate her. If only for a damn second.

"Believe me, it's much better the way it is." You bite the inside of your cheek now, almost to the
point of drawing blood. Was she okay with that? Was it better? Really?

Of course it was. What kind of witch wants a human as her mate, right? She probably should think
that this was just another irony of fate, making her connect with the least valuable thing this world
had. Your tears are now pretty evident, you are sure.

Why on earth you had to like this woman? She seemed to have a sign on her forehead that read
"I'm going to break your heart". And you still wanted. You still insisted.

It's your fault. Not hers. You should stop acting like a stupid child.

"If you didn't want this bloody bond." You almost feel the thread trembling with the way you refer
to it, almost the same way your voice trembles. Lilith's eyes widen at your tone. Yeah, you could
have a sharp voice too. Welcome to the club. "It was pretty simple. You just had to tell me. But
putting on the armor of the heartless witch is scoundrelly. It's dishonest. It's..." But you shut up.
You want so bad to be better for the way you were dishonest with your sister for so many years and
at the first opportunity...But you keep it to yourself. You didn't want to hurt her. You never want to
hurt her. You just wanted her to understand. You wouldn't fasten her to you, you just liked having a
friend. If she didn't want the bond...Fine, you were grown up enough to deal with it.

Yet, she somehow read what you didn't say. When you look at her again, thin tears are coming
down her eyes, thin and fast that weigh on your heart. The self-loathing echoes inside you now,
inside your pores. You shouldn't have come here, you should leave it as it was.

"Why did you stay anyway?" You feel that this is a more important question. More important than
why she didn't tell you. Why did she stay if she didn't want to get involved anyway? Why couldn't
she choose a single personality once and for all?

Lilith turns her eyes away from you, she prefers to stare at the floor.

"You asked me." A sigh comes out of your nose. Long and frustrating. Yeah, you remember that
part. You wish you didn't. "I wasn't going to but...Eda told me you were calling my name...While
you were sleeping..." Oh. That's a level worse than embarrassing.
You called her name and you don't even remember it. But it's not surprising. You could only think
of her while you were sick.

It was out of pity.

"She thought you were delirious due to the fever." Probably delusions, but delusions that only came
up in the first place because you needed to talk to her so badly. And she stayed. Pity. Just as it was
pity when she took you to the Owl House.

It was all about pity.

"Good to know that at least pity you felt for me." You twist your lips to keep your tears from
falling instantly. It was already hard enough without crying. Honestly, where did you think this
was going? You are talking to a woman who has kept a secret for decades from her sister. Do you
think you can demand anything just because you've been here for a month and a bit? She had no
obligation to tell you anything. She never did. That's not how she got used to things, she'd rather
shut than share. You had an answer. It's enough. "You know what?" You take a deep breath, trying
to take some oxygen to your brain. Breathe. "Take care, Lilith." It's quite a different feeling now. A
long shock runs through your limbs, but somehow it hurts more than having your veins filled with
fire like before. Because you are tired and you don't know if you have enough emotional stability
to deal with it all.

You really want to be more adult and accept rejection for what it is. You've had enough " Nos' " all
your life to just accept one more.

So why does it hurt so bad? You trusted her, didn't you? You closed yourself off for so long, for so
many years, you were so scared. And then...The first time you open up, that you truly let someone
in...It's like being stabbed.

It's the facts. Uneven Odds. Maybe you simply were never enough.

You turn around, ready to leave her room and go to sleep, after crying your life out of you. It would
be great to have a portal to the human world now, there weren't many places you could hide here.
In the human world you knew at least you could stay on the street without being eaten by
something.

Your good ears warn her step forward. The wood creaks.

"No." You turn around because it's always like that. She just needs a word, a single word, and you
stop because it's her...It's always her.

It's always been her.

Your eyebrows frown. You stare at Lilith. What? No what? What does she want to tell you? Does
she want to humiliate you just a little bit more?

However, you feel it in the air. A torment of confused emotions that makes you dizzy. Not yours.

She takes your hand between hers absolutely suddenly. Your eyes almost popping out of your face
because in the next second...She falls to her knees before you. Wha...What, it takes everything in
you to simply not pull away. What the hell Lilith Clawthorne?

"I..." Her voice breaks, completely out of that tone. She...She's Lilith again. Her voice is Lilith's,
even if her eyes are on the floor, shoulders bent.
You've never needed her to look you in the eye so painfully. You don't think you've ever felt this
many goosebumps from an image before. She's on her knees. She's letting it all hit her at once,
every bad thought, every omission, every guilt she carries so deep in her own skin that she barely
realizes it's there.

You have no idea what made her reconsider. But you don't pay attention to that...It's her.

"I'm sorry." She's asking you for forgiveness. On her knees.

And when she sobs, your skin tears apart.

You feel that your almost-forgotten plan to punch her face won't work a lot. Your tears are already
streaming down your face. Not like this.

"Please don't leave." She takes a breath, just long enough to kiss your knuckles. Her lips are cold
and trembling. Another thing that makes you want to squirm in your own body.

She was always warm, now she seemed as cold as death itself.

"Forgive me." She then brings your knuckles to her forehead, resting them there. It feels warmer,
but it doesn't stop a shiver from running through your entire body.

You're paralyzed.

It's a gesture of...respect? Oh. She broke you, perfectly, in every possible way...She...Did she do
that before? Is that how she apologized before? Oh, you're gonna kick that son of a bitch in the
balls so hard he's gonna throw them up.

It wasn't supposed to be like that. It's not fair that with a single sentence...She has broken you in
half again. You feel that pressure in your chest doubles in size as a lump forms in your throat.

You decide that she can do whatever she wants with your heart. It's hers to do so. The realization of
this hurts. It scratches your insides. But you don't care.

You just want to wrap her in your arms now. Because she never looked so small, on her knees in
the middle of that room, holding your hand, her head down. The self-loathing exuding from her in
waves. It's not fair, but it doesn't matter.

You don't care. Not really. When she sobs again your arms are already pulling her up.

You never want to see her on her knees again.

For no one.

If anyone ever brings her to her knees again you will kill. It doesn't matter that you've never hurt a
fly. You will kill whoever it is.

You wrap yourself around her, pulling her tight against your own chest. She's taller so this implies
that she is practically leaning against you, but she doesn't seem to care. Considering the next thing
you know she's wrapping her hands around your hip, sinking her face into your shoulder, a sob
caught in her throat. Her touch. It's as if so many things made sense.

How long has this woman been without hugging anyone? Weeks? Months? Years?

Her hands dig heavily into your waist. It doesn't hurt. It just shows you how much she needs it. She
doesn't want you to walk away and you know, deep in your soul, you never intended to.
The way she holds you...It's like you finally have a place in the world.

It's like breathing again. It's like sharing the air in your lungs with her. You think that if it was hard
to breathe, you would surely give your breath to her.

"I'm so sorry." You are not sure if she said it or if you heard her, but it doesn't matter. Her next sob
shakes her body so hard that you think it's quite possible that she'll break something, that she'll
crack, that she'll let it all out. But she's already breaking, every sob feels like it's going to split your
heart in half. You stroke her hair, you cradle her as she cries against your shoulder. It doesn't matter
that your own tears are already on your neck. Not at all. Just keep holding her. Just keep giving her
everything you can.

You're my little soldier. The reason I live.

Never again.

You will always hold her. You will always forgive her for anything. And that doesn't scare you. It
soothes you. It soothes the thread stretched across your back. You have to believe that this is
enough.

You have to believe that giving everything you've got is enough.

Oh. You missed her. You missed her perfume, her warmth. So bad.

And it's really extraordinary to feel how your emotions are mixed up at the moment. You feel your
own anger, you feel her self-loathing, you feel the sorrow of both of you. Again it's like a spectrum,
each emotion a color mixing inside of you. Now it looks very purple, black, dark blue, maybe gray.

The sense of time is gone. You have no idea how long you are just holding her, allowing her to
smear one of your favorite shirts with makeup and tears, her ear rubbing against your face with
each new sob. But when she pulls away your hands refuse to leave her. That's why, due to the
angle, you hold her cheeks. They are boiling as if she has a fever, and moist, which leads you to
rub the remnants of her tears away from her eyes.

"I was terrified." She whispers as you fix the smudged eyeliner with your fingertip. Your eyes go to
hers again and it's pure sincerity that you find now. None of the steel lady cold mask, none of that
poison she was throwing at you before. It's Lilith again. It's Lilith saying what she really feels
again. And you can't help but let out a sigh of relief. "I was terrified that night." She says it once
more, but this time in a firmer, more certain voice. She wants to tell you, she finally wants to tell
you. And you are willing to listen.

When would you not be? When would you not give your heart into her hands with a mere request?

"Mates can sense each other's emotions, can even hear thoughts sometimes." You remember that.
You remember feeling really sorry for Luz for the bucket of cold water Eda threw at her that day.
"Well..." She looks down for a brief second before looking at you again. Her eyes fill with tears
and you feel your heart being compressed to the size of a grape in your chest.

Never again.

"I heard you say about the stars before you actually said it. That had happened before, eventually,
and it was incredibly easy to ignore because it was about things I knew about, like magic or even
trivial things. Just good communication, right? Perhaps it was the moonlight conjuring energy as
well, it may have contributed. I have no idea." She sighs deeply for a moment. She's trying to
breath properly. "But there was no way I could have known about the Earth stars, Y/N. I felt you
inside my head at that moment, thinking about plasma and constellations before you even said the
words." And then she ran away. And then she locked herself in her room and Eda...Eda realized at
the same instant. "I was so out of my mind that when Eda came in...My room had enough feathers
to make a pillow." She averts her eyes again and this time she actually pulls away a little, enough to
have your hands fall from her face.

As if your touch was too much at the moment. And maybe it really was.

"When I told her...She thought it was a fantastic idea." She sighs. Lilith didn't think it was, though.
You press your lips together, feeling quite overwhelmed now. She's telling you. That's what you
wanted, isn't it? So hang in there like the adult you're supposed to be.

You don't really blame her. What kind of witch would want a human for a mate? That should be
some kind of shame for them or dishonor. Who knows?

It hurts anyway. You don't want it to hurt, but it hurts. You feel as if fire is burning in your veins
again.

"That's why when I told her not to tell you she almost punched me." Lilith leans back against the
nest, crossing her arms under her chest again. Protecting herself from unseen stares, nearly
protecting her own skin. "I..." And she looks at you this time. You rub your eyes roughly to banish
the tears that are falling again.

You didn't even notice when they started to.

"I'm sorry for the way I mistreated you." It scratches under your skin. Just the memory of her
voice, of her hard eyes, of those words so well placed to cut you in half. But this new memory...It's
worse, the prospect of her on her knees again, asking for your forgiveness. It makes your body
tremble violently. As long as you live she won't get down on her knees again. You promise
yourself that.

She may scream at you. She can be cold, she can put on the poison armor as many times as she
wants, as long as she never kneels again for forgiveness. It...You can't handle this act of self-
punishment.

It makes you wonder what others she has done. It makes your stomach turn and your bones shiver.

Never again.

"I was awful, I know. Something inside me wanted to tell you...But I couldn't do that...To you."
She couldn't give you false hope. Yet that same something inside you begs for her touch again, she
doesn't have to explain anything else. Just wrap yourself around her and let it go, let it all go.
Because it still hurts. It feels like the last time. Lilith looks up at the shining mobile.

When a tear trickles down her eye, it has the color of all colors thanks to the shiny objects
reflecting in her face. A rainbow seems to form on her cheek.

You wish you could paint...You would have painted a canvas of her at that moment. She never
looked so sadly beautiful.

"You..." Your eyes rise on their own, even though you feel that they are the only parts of your body
still functioning coherently. The pains of the disease are no longer so active, but weren't the poets
who said that rejection corrodes more than death?

The hand that gently strokes is the same hand that stones. And you expect to be standing to receive
that stone.

"Damn it, Y/N." She whispers, twisting her lips as if the next words would truly hurt. "You
deserve a lot more." The stone hits you, but...It's not exactly the way you expected. It seems to
have hit your head hard, harder than one of the punches you felt before, and you have no idea how
you didn't throw up all your delicious little soup. "Than me..." And then she just shrugs, but you
can almost feel in the air how she is trying to keep from sobbing.

You deserve more. More than her. You actually should have punched her as soon as you walked
through that door.

She pushed you away. She ignored you. She caused that weird and completely unstoppable pain in
both of you...Because she didn't think she was enough. She didn't think she was enough...And how
could you blame her when you felt the same way pretty often?

Gosh. How can you get into her thick skull that she is everything?

Everything. She is simply everything to you. You would literally let Arcadia Bay go to hell to save
her, without a second thought.

Why can't she just understand that you couldn't care less about this specter of victim and villain
that she had been constantly painting around herself? She is the woman you have learned to adore.
And you couldn't care less about the fact that she thinks you deserve more.

"I guess I'm a big girl to decide what I deserve." And you mean it. You were pretty grown-up to
decide what you thought was or wasn't worth your attention. And if you decided to devote your
days to understanding Lilith Clawthorne, it was obvious to you that she was worth it.

It takes a long moment for her to take her eyes off the mobile and really look at you. You see a lot
of different emotions now, but now you can read her. Perfectly. You can see the disbelief, you can
see the regret, the self-loathing. You can understand her.

Could you ever make her believe that she was worth as much as anyone else in the Owl House?

"A witch who cursed and almost killed her own sister and her apprentice, served as leader of the
coven of the greatest dictator these lands have ever seen..." She shakes her head negatively now. "I
nearly killed you because I'm cursed...And I can possibly hurt you again due to the fact I will
always be cursed." She contorts her face at the thought and you can almost feel her wince as if she
has spent a long time pondering this. "Do I have to go on?" No, she doesn't have to.

You don't think anything will change your mind. It's quite simple really.

You barely feel your legs as they guide you to lean against her side on the nest. Fingers inches
away from touching. You notice that hers are trembling, causing you to wonder if she had already
taken her elixir today.

You don't think you will be able to have this conversation with the raven beast.

"I don't care." And it sounds nice when you say it out loud. Because you truly don't. You feel her
eyes slowly go to you, staring at the top of your head as you are looking at your own shoes. "I don't
care what you've done, what people think of you, or even if you believe I deserve more." You raise
your face so you can look at her, her eyes softening at the corners and you are aware that it's for the
reason she can hear what you are going to say before you actually say it. "I like you, giant claws
and all." She smiles with the corner of her mouth, her eyes becoming bright with unshed tears. You
made her smile.
That was already something, right? It's not a complete recovery, but it's a smile.

"Is just wanting it enough?" And her voice sounds truly melancholy now. You don't need context.
That's the story of most theatrical tragedies. Not always wanting or even loving wholeheartedly is
enough. You can never know what will be enough. That's real life. It's disappointing and
heartbreaking real life.

She believes you deserve better. She believes that you shouldn't even give it a chance.

But when you look at her. At her head down, her twitching lips. The same witch who saved you,
who trusted you, who sang to bring you back from the darkness of your own mind, who watched
over you all night long. This witch who asked for your forgiveness on her knees. When you look at
this woman who has thrown your mental health to the limbo in every possible way. When you
realize that she is still wearing the moon earring in her right ear.

You are sure she is worth it.

She can be quite impulsive with her feelings, lock herself in shells of self-loathing, and push away
everyone else who comes near her. She feels too much. But she's still kind at a particularly high
level. She still makes acidic little jokes that make you laugh a lot. She still has the smile that makes
your heartbeats get a little faster. And she has the most beautiful eyes you have ever seen.

She's definitely worth throwing everything away and pretending that real life isn't chaotic. The
world is not easy, but it's not so bad. You think it can be a better place...If you can be by her side.

You don't hesitate. You drag your fingers across the surface of the nest until you can reach her
hand.

Your fingers curl into hers. It's not like the other times, not only because just touching her is like
relieving your own mind of a weight you didn't even realize was there, which you imagine is due
to the mating bond. But, this time you intertwine your fingers with hers.

She doesn't seem frightened, nor embarrassed. Perhaps it was the number of emotions you were
sharing. She just accepts it. She just accepts your touch as if it had always been this way. It feels
promising. Accepting.

"Try for me." The words seem to fill the space between you when they come out of your mouth.
They echo, fill the spectrum of emotions with a yellow that might as well be hope.

I don't need you to be perfect. I don't need anything to be perfect. I just need you to want to try.

I just need you. Just once, let me hold you.

She softens. It's like watching something melt around her, the metal walls are crumbling with ease
now to the point where it feels like they never existed.

"Try for you?" Her eyebrows pronounce only, merely the slightest amused twitch at the corner of
her lips.

"You didn't want to tell me about the bond because you thought I deserved better." She nods,
resignedly, following your reasoning in silence. You ponder your words for a moment before
actually saying them. "So...Would you try this bond for me?" She kept it inside for you. She
intended to keep it that way for you, even if it bothered, even if it scratched under the skin. Even if
Eda was eating herself up inside to tell you.
So could she make the small effort to try? Try. Let me try to help you heal the parts of you that
haven't managed to heal yet.

Because I want to. That's what I want. That's what everything inside me is telling me to do.

"You know you're not obligated to accept this bond, right?" You nod, even if you didn't know. It
didn't matter. It never did. Something inside you always knew from the beginning that if she
wanted to...There was nothing else to discuss. "You're a pretty stubborn and odd human, aren't
you?" And she is grinning with the corner of her lips as she says that, without moving her hand
away, without moving away from you. Her fingers feel even warmer as they squeeze gently around
yours, her pointed nails brushing your skin. A little shiver runs down your spine.

This could have a different ending than crying, screaming, and nausea.

"This coming from the witch wearing a human cartoon shirt about a boy in a post-apocalyptic
setting with an elastic dog and several princesses whose names are, for example, Princess Hot Dog
and Princess Bubblegum." She actually chuckles at that when she looks at her shirt, Finn and Jake
smiling.

"Yeah, I think you've got a point." The silence that extends now is neither uncomfortable nor
awkward. You just feel like you can breathe again. Not just because the disease is going away or
your own emotions are free, but you feel hers are similar. There is still a lot to sort out, but the
metal wall is not there and she is Lilith again. It takes everything in you not to thank her out loud,
because this...This is finally something you know. Something you have learned to like with
everything you have inside you. And her fingers are incredibly good to hold. "So nymphs brought
you here?" She inquires as she wipes her own face with her remaining hand, brushing away the
remnants of the tears. Not exactly a change of subject.

"Your fault." You jokingly nudge her shoulders and Lilith frowns with a smile, one that makes
your head feel extremely lighter.

"What have I done?" You examine your hands together for a moment before answering. They look
great like that.

"The nymphs thought that the sad woman going into the forest alone with paper spells could use a
mate." She seems to connect the dots while keeping a slight frown on her forehead.

"Yeah, the books don't lie when they say nymphs are a bunch of gossips." But she is laughing
when she says that. Loud and warm. Even if it was the result of gossip... You were here. You
owed the nymphs. And she probably thinks the same way. "You..." Your eyes rise to her again, all
attention on her, and it's just adorable when a blush starts to spread across her ears. You have no
idea what she is going to say to make her embarrassed.

You would still have to understand this connection you shared in a better way.

"Would you like to go on a date with me?" You think it's quite likely that she could be hearing your
heart right now.

It's beating... Stupidly fast.

Your cheeks heat up and you try to lower your head so she doesn't notice how childishly you react
to the smallest things around her. That sounded a lot like a "yes" to your previous question.

Yes...You two should try.

You have to remember that you are no longer a teenager and running away to dance in your
bedroom is a very 2000s romance movie attitude.

"A date?" You almost test the word on your tongue and it sounds nice. A date. With Lilith.

"I can try to make up for being a bitch to you." And her voice sounds slightly amused now. She's
smiling as she says this and you suspect it's that wide smile, even if you don't dare to raise your
face now. You press your lips together. Gosh, you want to be a little stronger and not say yes right
away so badly. But how could you not?

It's Lilith. She doesn't need much to break you in half.

"I'd love to." You can feel her smiling, with both sides of her mouth, just as you feel her gently
squeezing your fingers once again. You also feel an extremely great excitement pumping through
your veins, you have no idea if it's coming from her or you.

"Tonight?" You nod in agreement, the grin creeping across your lips in a rather pathetic way. Lilith
Clawthorne.

Lilith Clawthorne has invited you on a date. Oh, Titan. Luz had to come home soon.

"It's a date then." Okay. You need to go now. You really need to run off and stick your head in a
book, your music or sleep all afternoon or you'll freak out.

You gently let go of her fingers immediately missing their warmth and then stand up.

"Mmm...I will...Mmm..." Suddenly your shoes looked very interesting. You didn't exactly have
anywhere else to go. You just didn't quite know what to do after that invitation. Lilith lets out a
giggle at your embarrassment before getting up as well.

"I'll see you at 7. Try to rest, it will be good for you." You nodded and thought that was the perfect
cue for you to leave so you mustered all the courage within you to look up. The corners of her eyes
are crinkling with a smile, a smile that makes you grin in a very evidently cheerful way. Oh, Titan
how is your heart not beating through your blouse? You start your way to the door and you feel
your hands are sweating. Before you can reach the doorknob, however, you hear her voice. "Wait."
And as always. That's all it takes. One word and you stop in place.

You turn around with slightly frowning eyebrows and Lilith is chuckling even more as she reaches
up and grabs your chin gently with one hand. Her fingers feel quite warm and just the soft, careful
scraping of her nails across your skin makes your whole body shiver.

Your heart stopped a beat. You almost saw her kissing you. You almost felt that she would do it
under your skin.

But the witch just leaned in close enough to touch her warm lips to your cheek. Her smell is
fascinating, so fresh, and her lips are as soft as rose petals. It's truly hard not to just turn your face a
little bit to feel them against your own mouth.

"You may go now." If only you had legs to go after that. Your calf muscles feel much weaker than
before with the cold. Your face is hot enough now to fry an egg and you try to smile naturally
before you leave, but it must have come out as a grimace because Lilith laughed before biting her
lower lip softly. Her eyes are sparkling with a certain...Cleverness? Another thing that made your
legs turn to jelly. This woman would kill you before you even had a chance to go on a date with
her.
You need to sleep. It's your first thought as you step into the hallway and stagger a little, feeling
every nerve in your body respond to a little kiss.

You need an outfit. It's your second.

You need Luz. That's three.

 Chapter 13
Chapter Summary

The one with a very deserved date.

Luz barely had time to take a breath as she set foot inside the house before you rushed down the
stairs and grabbed her arm.

"Oh. Good afternoon to you too, Y/N." Eda greeted you with a sneering smile, you just waved
before continuing to pull the girl by the hand. Luz followed you without question, only with a
chuckle.

Once you are in the safety of your room, you close the door and let go of her arm. Your hands
immediately go to your hair in complete desperation.

"Well? Are you feeling better?" The girl looks at you expectantly and with a smirk that says,
somehow, she already knows.

"Mm yes. Lilith asked me out." You say promptly. Luz's jaw drops and you anticipate the squeal
before it even happens. She let out a tiny squeal of joy before grabbing your waist in a tight hug.

"I KNEW IT! MY SHIP HAS TRULY SAILED!" You smile at this, but concern keeps pumping
through your body, obviously.

"But there is one thing." Her eyes go to you again, eyebrows slightly twitched in doubt. "I have
nothing to wear." Luz rolled her eyes so hard it was impossible not to find it funny.

"Oh Titan, Y/N, I thought you were about to say you'd have to do three impossible tasks to go on
this date." You frown at this, tempted to ask, but you give up halfway through. "What do you want
to wear?" She inquires as she takes a walk around you as if analyzing what kind of clothes would
look best on you.

"I have absolutely no idea what to wear on a date with a witch, Luz." She chuckles softly at that
before pulling Hexide's jacket off her shoulders and sitting down with one leg under the other on
your mattress.

"You know she doesn't care about what you wear, right?" You frown at that. "She's your mate,
Y/N." It's not like you know exactly what that means. It's like a soul mate, yet stronger. Well, you
are quite similar to her, you get along well, you always have a lot to talk about, she makes your
legs weak with a smile...But how this bond acts is still odd to you. She has possibly heard your
thoughts, you also have a great sense of what she is going to say before she says it, you have this
little golden thread running down your spine. But what exactly it is to be someone's mate still
seems a bit nebulous. "No dresses or skirts." You frown again, getting back to the conversation
with Luz, you had beautiful legs, it would be a good opportunity to reveal that. "The staff, Y/N."
Ah. Yes. The staff. There was no way you could ride that thing wearing a dress or skirt. Luz had a
good point.

"Pants then. Okay." You must look incredibly desperate because Luz lets out a rather amused
giggle as her eyes sparkle.

"Why don't you take a shower and I'll get you some outfits? I'm not good with makeup, so I can't
help you with that, but I love playing stylist." You take a deep breath. Yeah. Sounds like a plan. It's
almost six o'clock. It's just prudent to start getting ready.

"Okay. Shower." Luz laughs louder this time and picks up your towel hanging in a corner of the
room, handing it into your hands.

"Shower, Y/N." You nod and more out of instinct than anything else you make your way to the
bathroom at the end of the hall.

(...)

You tried on a total of 6 looks that Luz produced. The one chosen was the third, after the second
fitting. A yellow sweater, plaid pants, belt, because the pants were one size bigger than yours, and
your all-stars. It was nice, but it still looked like you, and that's the way you liked it. Luz,
particularly, preferred the one with the vest, but vest was so 2000s.

The girl sat with you while you put on eyeliner, mascara, and gloss. It was the only makeup you
had in your backpack.

"You look beautiful." She said looking over the mirror, an adorable little smile at the corner of her
mouth.

"Thank you, Luz." You smiled back and actually felt your heart stop a beat because you are almost
completely sure you felt her coming down the stairs to the living room. You didn't hear it, you felt
it. Somehow you felt that she was no longer on the second floor but on the first. As if the thread
was a little tauter.

That's pretty cool if you were honest.

"Lilith's already downstairs." You say, more to yourself than to the girl in front of you, and Luz's
eyes go wide.

"Can you really feel her?" You shake your head in affirmative and Luz lets out a huge smile
"Damn, girl. That's cool." And it was. It was almost magical how aware you were of her presence.

You even thought about putting some other jewelry, a necklace, or another earring in your right
ear. But only the star earring in your left ear seemed appropriate.

You were ready. Well, technically ready. Clothes-wise ready. Psychologically, not at all.

"Will you tell me everything when you arrive?" Luz asked as you took one last look at yourself in
the mirror, feeling that icy thing spread across the space below your diaphragm.

"Of course I will." You ruffle her hair fraternally before straightening your sweater and finally
getting the courage to leave the room. Luz leaves with you which gives you a little bit more
motivation.

With each step you take down the stairs you feel your stomach sink a little more, it would be a
great time to be twelve again and run screaming into the blankets. But it's a good fear. You are
anxious. After all, you're anxious due to the fact you like her, because you hope you can try.

You are afraid that you won't be what she wants or is looking for. But you need to go anyway.
Luz continued, she enters the room first, jumping up next to Eda on the sofa.

You hear her voice, talking to her sister and Hooty and King apparently.

Great, everyone is in the living room.

You take a breath to get a little more courage before you enter.

And then. Everything disappears. As soon as you enter the room, her eyes go to you, and she...She
smiles, warm and soft.

Not one of those wide smiles, but still enough to make your heart resonate in your ears.

Gosh. She looks so beautiful it hurts.

She's wearing a suit for the Titan's sake. A white shirt under a black blazer like her own hair,
tailored pants that look great with her legs, and high-heeled boots. She's wearing heels, real heels.
You will faint before you even leave the house. Her face, however, looks the same, the same
hairstyle, the white streak delicately placed through her black hair, the same smooth makeup, the
moon earring in her right ear.

You wouldn't want her to change anyway.

When she gets up, you believe it's quite likely that your face will explode. Eda raises her eyebrows
suggestively in your direction, Luz lets out a giggle, and King is faking a vomit. Hooty has little
heart eyes, which you find quite adorable.

She stops in front of you, her differently colored eyes watching you a little higher than usual. Her
smile widens and you feel your legs become pretty weak.

"Ready?" She reaches out her hand to you and it must be pathetic the way you hold her fingers
without hesitation. Still warm and delicate and quite comfortable.

"Re-Ready." You stutter the word and hear Eda wheezes in the corner of the room.

"I want you both here by eleven-thirty." Lilith gives her sister her best "Really?" look before
simply rolling her eyes and starting her way to the door, sighing. "I mean it. I want to know the
details and I'm not going to sleep until I get it." If Lilith wasn't a polite person you are sure she
would have shown her middle finger at her sister now.

"Have fun!" Hooty and Luz chorused and you sent them both a kiss with your hand before you
walked out the back door, closing it behind you.

The tone of the sea that night looked a lot like raspberry and the sky was in that late afternoon
shade of purple to dark blue.

"So..." You almost jump to the side when Lilith releases your hand so that her staff appears
between her fingers. "Where do you want to go?" Have you ever seen her eyes this gentle? So far
away from everything, focused only on you? You can't remember if this has ever happened, but it's
impossible not to sigh. It's impossible not to think that this has just begun, and you already feel an
overwhelming need to touch her.

"You know I don't know anything about the boiling isles, right?" She nods, looking very excited
about it. Looking very excited to show you everything. "Do you have a favorite place?" Her eyes
sparkle this time, you can swear they really do rise with some kind of charm.
"I had a favorite place when I was a kid..." She ponders for a moment before tossing her staff into
the air. Riven opens his wings, spreading them out, ready to fly. "Shall we?" She reaches out again
as she sits on the staff. The thought of flying again is not so exciting, but what wouldn't you do just
to stand next to her?

"Let's." That's what you say before you grab her hand to sit down. You think you have enough self-
control so that you don't need to hug her waist in sheer dread, so you rest your hands on her
shoulders.

You are ready, but Lilith doesn't move for a moment causing you to frown. You were about to ask
if something was wrong when she spoke again.

"If you feel safer on the waist...I won't mind...Honestly." Your cheeks are reddening again, but you
had had enough experience with staffs to know that they were fast, went too high and you slipped
too easily. If she doesn't mind, then it's safer. It's for all these reasons, or at least that's what you tell
yourself, that you move your hands down until you can wrap both arms around her waist, feeling
the suit fabric softness on your fingertips. Her perfume hits you like a refreshing cloud now. Tulips
and forest. Fresh and sweet.

When she actually leaves the ground a fairly intense shiver runs down your spine causing you to
clasp your arms around her tighter. Further and further off the ground, faster and faster to get to the
right height.

But when you are a little above the level of the tower, flying towards wherever she is going to take
you. It's actually good. The wind is nice. She's warm, and she doesn't seem to mind that you are
close enough to rub your nose in her hair. Not even a little.

The light balls are beginning to decorate the dark sky and you think there are worse ways to travel.
It's beautiful. Lilith is even more beautiful.

You travel for a few minutes, but you can see a lot. The city, the marshes, some lakes, some
villages and houses further away, huge forests stretching across the boiling isles. The sea. The
morbid beauty enchants you in many ways.

She lands if you can say that from a staff, on a rather busy street in the city. The staff disappears as
she makes another hand gesture and then you begin to walk.

The city seems less threatening now. There are still relatively scary species and garbage cans that
eat the trash. But you are with Lilith. The woman who saved you once and who surely can save
you again. It's a silent walk, which makes you understand that you were really close and she
wanted you to see.

It's not until you see the lights that you realize where she is taking you. It's not different from the
human world at all. A big building with colored lights around a huge sign where separate letters
displayed titles and names. It gives you tremendous nostalgia.

"Cinema?" You can barely contain the words inside your mouth. Lilith turns her face to you, her
smile looking somewhat suggestive.

"Let's just say that I may have been a child who was a little obsessed with movies." And her voice
sounds so welcoming now. Like honey. Dense and sweet.

"Me too!" She raises her eyebrows at that. Man, you were passionate about Lord of the Rings, Star
Wars, Back to the Future, whatever nerdy shit was playing on TV. You also loved the old and new
generation horror movies, Robert Eggers, Jordan Peele, Ari Aster.

"What kinds of movies do you like?" You look at the posters next to her. And you are
exceptionally surprised how many of them look a lot like earth movies with different species
actors. It's quite comical actually.

"I love sci-fi, fantasy, historical, horror." Lilith raises her eyebrows at the last category and you
don't even have to ask what her favorite is.

"How about that one?" She points to a "The silence of the lamps" poster. You almost laughed out
loud because there was a woman on the cover with a lamp in her mouth instead of a moth.
Creative, you had to admit.

"It sounds perfect." She grins at you and touches your hand for a brief moment before walking
away to the box office. You watch the other posters, more to avoid the outburst your body was
with the fact she was the one who touched you this time. There seemed to be a boiling isles version
of Shrek, as well as Ghost and other pretty famous movies. You wonder if this had something to do
with a connection between worlds, string theory. Could it be that some people were simply born on
the boiling isles with the personality of earth people, and maybe even the same appearance, but
different species?

You have no idea how long you ramble on about this conspiracy theory.

"A snail for your thoughts." You jump in place when she suddenly appears beside you again. Her
voice was in a somewhat amused tone. This woman sometimes seemed like a shadow sneaking
around places.

"Just thinking about the human world, movie theaters are not that different." Lilith nods and only
then you realized what she's holding. Two different bags, but colored like sweet popcorn bags from
earth, and there's a rather large cup in her other hand, with a straw that looks like it's made of
something edible.

"So...They had no human popcorn, no nachos. I'm sorry about that, I know that's what you guys
eat." You frown now. How she had any idea what you guys ate in the movies on earth is what
really worries you, you don't remember telling her that. "I...I asked Luz when you went to take a
shower." The blush seems quite evident on her face now, turning her nose pink. She went to ask
Luz what you could and could not eat. That's so sweet. Your heart seems to swell in your chest.
"Anyway, I got everything you could digest from the menu. Hmm, I have chips here, maltesers,
and a milkshake. I know you are lactose intolerant, but these are not made from milk. I confirmed,
they use a cream made from flower oil, so no problem." How can she be like this? How can she
seem like such a harsh woman and then remember a detail about you that you've said weeks ago?
"Do you like chips?" You comprehend that you must have stood for a few long minutes just
looking at her and not believing that there could be someone like that.

And that someone like that could like you.

"Chips are perfect." You take the chips bag and the milkshake to free her hands. And then, again in
a poorly calculated and completely impulsive act, you propel yourself to kiss her cheek. Her skin is
soft to the touch. It's almost impossible not to want to make that moment last longer.

When you pull away you feel your ears burning and your face quite warm. Her cheeks have a
beautiful shade of red as she looks down for a moment.

"Thank you." You whisper and she just nods her head gently, smiling a little sideways, which
makes your heart beat faster. She looked so gorgeous when she was embarrassed.

"So..." She cleans her throat for a moment and then looks back. "The movie starts in 10 minutes, do
you want to get in line?" You nod and the two of you make your way down the hallway
surrounded by red ribbons. There are people of different species, most with pointed ears, but you
don't feel lost. Because Lilith is here and you don't think you have ever felt as safe with anyone as
you do with her, and she can turn into a raven beast that could easily swallow your head.

"Did you use to come here with Eda?" She looks at you again, and it's very hard not to creep up
from under her eyes. There is nothing here. It's just you two. There are no other people between
you because this is a date. Just you and her. Hair-raising.

"She was basically my only friend, so yeah." Your eyes go to your feet again. From time to time
you would forget that she was a lonely child. It was easy to forget when she had that constant
attitude of a very well-settled woman, a powerful witch who never bowed to anyone.

"Most of the time I went alone." Sneaking out to be more exact. Most of the movies you watched
weren't esteemed by your mother, so you would go alone, not wanting to involve anyone in it.
Lilith tilts her head in your direction, she was considerably taller with the addition of her heels.

"Well...Now you have me." You don't think she understood what she said until she said it. You
moisten your lower lip with the tip of your tongue, suddenly feeling it too dry. Her face looks like a
tomato now and you have to lower yours to giggle a little as the heat spreads easily across your
chest and neck. "And Luz. I bet she'd love to come too." In the near future, it would be good to
come to the movies with the whole family. You guys would just have to figure out a way to bring
Hooty.

She hands your tickets to a hybrid between a pig and a crocodile who looks incisively at your ears
before letting you in. You almost thought he would say something.

"Enjoy the movie." That was all he said before opening the red ribbon to the reddish corridor of the
movie theater interior.

Room 10. Oh, you were feeling so nostalgic. You can't even remember what was the last movie
you watched in the cinema, probably Joker. When would you have imagined that the next time you
went to the movies would be with a witch, your mate? You still have no idea how deep that bond
is, it's not like you know much beyond what Eda has told you. But just being able to hang out with
Lilith is already pretty cool. Trying is pretty cool.

Your seats are right at the back of the room, which you love. You used to hate sitting in the front
or in the middle. You always felt like you were being watched. Maybe she feels that way too.

And when you sit next to her, with a milkshake and a bag of chips. There's nothing else on your
mind. You're in a movie theater, with Lilith Clawthorne, on a date. It seems like a very distant
dream, and here you are. You don't think anything has ever felt so right.

"I've honestly never had this candy." She watches the bag of maltesers with a rather scientific
interest. "What does it taste like?" She looks at you as you steal one of them from her, taking it in
your mouth. It may just be your imagination, but you find her following your gesture with her eyes,
pausing for a long moment in your mouth. You swallow the little ball quite hard.

"It's chocolate, but you have to crumble in your mouth." She frowns slightly before taking one of
them between her fingernails and putting it in her mouth. You again watch her pupils increase in
size and this time you can't help but chuckle. It was always going to be particularly adorable to you
how some parts of her body reacted to stimuli.

She is adorable. So adorable. It would be impossible to ever be mad at her again if she continued
with this kind of behavior. She grins at you, the wide smile that makes your heart go wild.

Gosh, she is beautiful. You can't even notice the other people coming into the room, sitting in
chairs.

And when the lights go out you're sure this is already the best date you've ever been on.

(...)

You tried not to talk too much during the movie so as not to disturb the people around you. You
didn't want to be the annoying kids in the back. But you couldn't help but point out some things
that you already knew about the original film like the fact that Doctor Lacter liked to eat witch
meat, which caused Lilith to poke the side of your waist in reproach. She ate almost the entire bag
of maltesers, while you gorged yourself on chips. The milkshake was surprisingly good and you
shared. Constant indirect kisses while the Bison Bill's story, the man who killed women to remove
their skin and left little light bulbs inside their mouths, was told on the screen.

You didn't see the hours passing during the movie. Not really, not while you had to divide your
attention between a very creative and interesting film and an even more interesting woman next to
you. It was hard to know what to focus on.

And you were doing a decent job. A great job. Until Lilith decided to propel herself over her chair
to put her mouth against your ear.

"I really liked that actress." It's a whisper. A whisper against your ear. You try to keep steady as
your whole body shivers with her voice sounding that close. She has an extremely hot breath and
her voice in that low and husky tone, in the chilling cadence. It takes everything in you not to close
your legs in pure instinct. Heat rushes through your whole body to rest in your stomach.

It's so pathetic the way it affects you. One little whisper and you're already shaking from head to
toe.

But what could you do? You had a soft spot for her voice, as well as her hands, her smile. She only
needed a small gesture to have you on your knees.

"Do you guys have anything like movie awards?" You try not to stutter, and you try not to turn
your face to her. You are not sure what you will do if you look at her mouth right now.

"Hmm yes, we do. She could probably win as a lead actress in drama." All your hair stands this
time because her voice seems to sound even closer, the heat pushing the hair away from your face.
You swallow hard. Does she have any idea how difficult she is really making things for you at that
moment?

You think she does. There is a chuckle in the air as she moves away to sit down again.

You are sure that you've stopped paying complete attention to the movie at that moment. From the
moment she whispered in your ear, all you could focus on was her. It was a good thing that the
movie was already in the end. You no longer had the concentration to watch anything. Your whole
body was alert with the slightest interaction of her around you.

You were out into the starry night minutes later, fully formed. The sky was wonderful, it felt like a
beautiful night to walk on the beach and feel the ocean.
"That was a good movie." That's what you say as you walk through the city's winding streets. Even
though the people on Earth probably wouldn't agree with you. People walk back and forth and if it
weren't for the occasional horns, or the extra eyes, or even the pointy ears...It could be an ordinary
day in a human city you didn't know.

"Serial Killers were always something Eda and I loved as kids." You frown at that now.

"Did you guys search that sort of thing as kids?" Your eyes go to her again. She's pushing a lock of
dark hair away from her eyes. Ah, that suit looks...Wow on her. It should be a crime to be beautiful
like that.

"Ah. Yes." She lets out a chuckle next, which makes the hairs on the back of your neck stand
again. "Serial Killers, haunting cases, missing people that were never found. I guess it's part of
every witch's growth." You think about that one time when you were 7 years old and saw a Jigsaw
scene when your uncles didn't notice. You dreamed about that fucking clown for the rest of the
month.

"What about playing? Hide-and-seek? Tag?" You must have incited some memory because she's
smiling pretty wide now while resting her hands in her pants pockets. Oh. Your gay panic will
strike any time soon.

"I've always been the best at Hide-and-seek, always hiding in the most unlikely places. And I've
always been better with illusion spells too." She offers you a complicit little wink. You can not help
it. This woman was making things really difficult for you.

"I was better in blind man's buff...Because of the ears." She looks with genuine interest at you. Her
eyebrows slightly twitched, a smile adorning the corner of her mouth. "I've been playing guitar
since I was 7, so I started ear training pretty early on to tune and identify notes. No one could beat
me at a game where I needed to listen to win." She tilts her chin down, her eyes looking pretty
bright as she says her next words.

"And when did you start singing?" You don't remember her voice ever sounding so...Sweet as
candy. She's immersing you so easily with these changes in her voice and you are falling so well.
She's one of the few people who have ever heard you sing anything and her interest really makes
you believe that you can sing minimally well.

"About the same time. But you were the only people who ever heard me." She raises her eyebrows
slightly in surprise. Perhaps realizing that you two were equally lonely when younger, trying to
find a way to connect with people who weren't simply looking for someone you weren't. For her it
was the emperor's coven, for you it was your parents.

Your eyes then glance at a poster hanging on a nearby wall. "Wanted". You raise your eyebrows
when you realize that it's a drawing of Lilith with a blue fireball in one hand, her staff in the other.
"The Raven Lady". She had a forked tongue coming out of her mouth while a blue fire with
interesting intricacies came out from behind Riven's spread wings. The reward was far greater than
you could count, it had too many zeroes and your mind boggled.

She was a traitor now, wasn't she? Eda was one of the most wanted criminals once for her crimes
and for refusing to join a coven. Lilith left the coven, being its leader, she practically told the
emperor to fuck himself politely.

Mama, I'm in love with a criminal. You have to hold back the laughter at your own thought.

And you would be lying if you said you care about that.
"Ice cream!" It is Lilith's exclamation that brings you back to this reality. There is an ice cream
parlor down the street, a large cone with an ice cream ball as a sign. You chuckle at how excited
she seems about it. Lilith Clawthorne, former head of the emperor's coven, previously the harshest
woman you have ever seen. Currently almost clapping her hands for seeing an ice cream parlor.
You think you could have kissed her if there weren't so many people around.

You approach the place. There are some customers and the smell is really good, sweet and slightly
refreshing.

But it's not like in the movies. Perhaps in the movies wasn't so evident. But as soon as you enter
behind Lilith you feel practically everyone's gaze on you, more specifically on your head, precisely
on your ears.

You have to stop yourself from raising your own hands to cover them.

They know you are human, and they don't seem to like that a lot. It's almost palpable in the air.

You can't remember the last time you felt so exposed, and it's impossible not to feel that
uncomfortable shiver running down your spine.

You don't know if she feels through the bond, or if she just realizes what's happening, because the
next thing you know Lilith's gripping your fingers gently, holding your hand in hers as if it were
the most ordinary thing in the world.

She's holding you.

She's protecting you.

You lower your head, now the gazes seem even more incisive and you know well that your face is
a red mess, but her hand is warm and your heart is beating hard.

It seems a rather long way to the back of the store.

"What do you want?" She leans in to ask directly against your face. Perhaps she's just trying to look
intimate to keep those people away. Yet something tells you that she has realized the effect her
voice has on you. When you look at her you almost can see her eyes sparkle with slight malice and
a particularly warm smile on those black-colored lips.

"Mint?" You ask. She nods and turns to the person on the other side of the counter. It's a witch
who is staring at your ears without any disguise, directly and with frowning eyebrows. You
wonder if she wants to throw up. Lilith tightens her fingers around yours. Delicately, but still firm
enough to be quite evident.

"I'd like a chocolate and mint carton, please." The girl with blue hair frowns, but does not refuse to
serve you, you thank her for that. When she turns away, you lean on your tiptoes so you can
whisper to her.

"Is it that obvious that I'm human?" Lilith compresses her lips at the question and then shrugs for a
moment, looking back as if to make sure no one is approaching.

"I guess besides the ears, the shoes told on you." You look down at your cute, pink all-stars with a
frown. "People here wear boots more often." She replies with a humorous grin on her lips, "But I
think your shoes are cute." Just like she thinks you're cute, that's what she said that day in the
kitchen and you still can't get over it.
The girl didn't look happier when she returned with the carton Lilith asked for. But she paid and
then you were free to leave the ice cream parlor before they grabbed torches and pitchforks to hunt
the human.

"So...We can eat while we walk home." The mint ice cream smell felt exceptionally promising and
you wanted to stick a spoon in it.

"I...I have a better idea." You raise your eyes to Lilith and she's smiling broadly, that smile, as she
hands the ice cream to you and makes the familiar gesture with her hands so the staff appears
between her fingers.

You want to ask where, but honestly, you don't care.

(...)

"Okay. What was your favorite subject in school?" The sea looks lovely, in a cobalt hue that
reflects the tiny light balls. You have no idea if she heard you when you thought about the beach or
if it was just a perfect night to be at the beach. The sand's quite warm and even though you worry
that Lilith is going to coat her suit with it, she doesn't seem to mind, not a bit. She is shoveling
another spoon into the ice cream carton when she asks you this question, her hair being blown
away from her face by the soft sea air.

This place...This place is beautiful. The little shiny shells on the water's edge, the bone-like cliffs
jutting out around you. You can imagine a young Lilith here, running away from the worries of the
world, playing with Eda, just as she used to run to the roof when she was feeling overwhelmed and
couldn't sleep.

"Literature." The answer comes immediately. It was the one class where you felt like you weren't
an outsider, felt welcomed by the words of people who lived years, centuries before you.

It's like breathing. Books gave you breath for years.

"Eda and I always had a talent for potions...But to be honest I was more into illusions. I always
sneaked through secret passages in the school so I could attend the classes." Just Lilith would
make something "bad" sound this nerdy. She seems to stare at the ocean for a moment before
speaking again. "Can you hear my thoughts?" This time she really provokes your total curiosity,
making you turn your head in her direction. She looks beautiful outside of any city light, only the
moonlight. Her hair looks silver, her gray eye glows, her skin reflects the moonlight as it did that
night. She looks so ethereal in the night light. You are afraid to touch her.

"It's not exactly hearing, right?" She agrees with a nod. "It's more like, feeling what you're going to
say, sometimes I can hear a word or a phrase, but it's not as loud if that makes any sense." Lilith's
grin widens across her face, you don't remember seeing her smile so much in a single night.
Perhaps you were finally keeping your promise. "And...I felt something when I found out about the
bond." Lilith frowns slightly this time with curiosity quite evident shining in her eyes. "It's like a
thread stretched down my spine." You almost raise your hand to slide your fingers where the tip of
it is supposed to be, at the base of your neck. "I don't know if that has something to do with it or if
I'm going crazy, but I can feel it inside, even if there's nothing on the outside." The witch frowns a
little more before bringing her hand to the back of her own neck, your eyes following the gesture.
Exactly where you thought the tip was.

"Ah. I thought it could be some side effect of the curse." She chuckles then, amazed, you observe.
"I have to study more...But I'm pretty sure it would get stronger with consummation." She didn't
say anything absurd. You already knew that. You are only sure you are someone's mate when there
is carnal consummation, where you accept the bond. That doesn't stop the heat from rising pretty
quickly to color your cheeks and leave them burning. You...You'd have to have sex with Lilith at
some point. Well...that was how relationships normally developed. But for some reason, the
prospect that it might actually happen makes a rather teen panic rise in you. It's not like you've
never done it, you've just never done it with someone you really liked. "But it's a good thing you
can't read my mind." She doesn't explain what consummation is to you, you notice. She changes
the subject. You tilt your head in her direction and now you are sure her eyes are glittering with
amusement.

"What's so indecent about that head?" Lilith lets out a rather amused laugh, clouding your mind
with the sound.

"It would rain on my parade." You frown, and the witch grins a little wider before moving the ice
cream carton so that there's nothing between you. "Because I wish I could say that I really enjoyed
hanging out with you." And how should you answer that with other than your red face and
unsteady hands? "I don't think I made up for being a bitch to you, but I had fun and it's been a
while since I've had this kind of fun with someone else." She has read a lot of books, she must have
been a speaker once. She pronounces words so easily and it's so fascinating. She knows exactly
what to say to make you a little shaky with that husky voice.

"It was nice to be able to see that you like horror movies and are childishly passionate about ice
cream." Lilith shakes her head negatively as she looks out at the ocean again.

"It was nice to see that you have a maniacal grin on your face while a serial killer commits
cannibalism." You actually laugh this time, loud enough for anyone on that deserted beach to hear
you. But there is no one. That's why you don't care, let alone when you turn your eyes back to her
and her eyes are crinkled at the corners with that smile, teeth and all.

"Can I tell you a secret?" And she just nods. That's enough for you. "I'm only scared of clowns."
She tries to keep her laugh, you see how she holds it and compresses her lips. She's truly trying to
consider your feelings here, but she finally breaks and a loud laugh that makes your ears quite silly
fills you.

"You stared at me in my bestial form. And you're afraid of clowns?" She chuckles again, this time
softly, shaking her head negatively as if she simply can't believe you.

"Don't get me wrong." You can easily get lost in the glare her eyes have now. "But it's hard to be
scared of a giant crow that was trying to give me a sparkly necklace." You nipped the laughter in
the bud, her smile diminishes. It's so easy to notice the blush going up to her ears, making them
quite adorable. "And red suits you." You add then, quite amused that you can make her so
uncomfortable with her own reactions.

"That's my line!" She complains as she nudges your shoulders. And when you laugh again. You
don't know if you believe this is happening. You are here, in the middle of a beach, laughing and
being silly with each other. How long have you just wanted her to be more open with you?

How long have you wanted her to know that she had a friend in you?

You are silent for a moment. And what comes to your mind is that it's probably almost 11 p.m.
already and you had to respect Eda's curfew.

"There's...There's something in your hair. Can I take it out?" You nod almost unconsciously, it's
probably a leaf. There were trees around and it felt like it was time for the leaves to fall. You just
didn't calculate what that would entail.
Lilith moves a little closer and pushes a few strands of your hair away with her hand to remove
whatever is in the middle of your hair. It was really a leaf that she throws into the sand again. You
had a safe distance of a few inches before. It's over now, Well, that's it.

You don't know exactly where to look. She's right in front of your face, green eye, silver eye
looking straight into yours. Nose lined, cheeks sharp, lips thin and colored black. Oh. Titan. She's
so gorgeous you want to run away in fear.

You'd be lying if you said you'd ever felt that. She's just looking at you, she's just standing in front
of you and your heart feels like a drum inside your chest, your breath feels warmer and you feel
like you could snap at any moment.

It's her. Lilith. Your mate. And it feels so right the way she makes your body feel, the way she
makes your mind feel.

And it scares you so bad. How long have you looked for someone you could really feel something
for? How long did you just want to kiss someone and feel something beyond sexual desire?

She's more than that. Extensively more. You just want to adore her.

You're not imagining when her eyes fall to your lips for a long moment, her warm breath hitting
your cheek.

She sighs then, slightly hard, before pulling away.

She's pulling away.

For fuck's sake no. Your impulsiveness acts before you can even blink.

You grab the lapels of her suit between your fingers causing her eyes to go wide at you. She asks
without even needing to open her mouth.

"Stay." That's what you say, for the second time you ask her to stay. But there is so much more you
wish you could say. You wish you could say that she is the first person who makes you feel like
this, like at any moment you are going to starve to death if you don't touch her. That you accept
every part of her, the ones she's proud of and the ones she's not. That you want to kiss her so badly
now that the back of your neck is agonizing.

You don't know if she can understand all this through the bond. But she looks into your eyes and it
seems that you don't need more than that. You are afraid of what you feel occasionally due to the
fact it's too intense. Yet you would never deny it. That thing running in your veins and calling her.
You couldn't.

You moisten your lower lip with your tongue, trying to think rationally.

"May I kiss you?" Your voice comes out like a poor whisper. Low and husky. Lilith tilts her head
gently as if pondering or as if she didn't understand your question. You actually wish you could
read her mind now because you have no idea what she's thinking about this extremely childish
request of yours. Her eyebrows rose and you feel that your face has the color of tomatoes now.
You feel like a child caught making a mess, "It's okay if you don't want to..." And it was. You were
the impulsive one, that didn't mean she had to be as well. You might have to cry your life out of
you when you got to the Owl House again if she rejected you, but it was okay. You were quite an
adult and could handle it. "I..."

"Oh. Don't be silly." It's the last thing you hear her muttering before she cups your face and
then...She touches her lips to yours.

You expected it and at the same time, you didn't.

The euphoria inside you is almost uncontrollable when her mouth touches yours. You have been
fantasizing about this kiss for a few weeks, a few nights, recurrent dreams, and even your wildest
fantasies and daydreams couldn't compare with reality.

You close your eyes and let her drown you.

Her lips are soft as rose petals on yours, her breath is warm and fails against your cheek, her long
fingers seem to hold your face with all the care in the world, and she smells so good.

Your whole body reacts to her, shudders and writhes wanting as much of her as possible, the thread
trembles, your fingers tighten around the lapels of her suit, almost a guarantee that she would stay
close like this.

But Lilith suddenly pulls away, making your breath hitch. You swear that if she runs away again
you'll punch her. Your eyes open excessively slowly, you feel a little dizzy and then you don't
exactly understand. She's staring at you with completely flushed cheeks and hard breathing. You
tilt your head.

She seems to be looking for some kind of hesitation. Stubborn, impossible woman. You mutter to
yourself. In what world would you refuse her kiss?

It's your turn to pull her, and she meets you halfway. Your lips tangle again, and to say your mind
swims would be an understatement. Your whole body melts around her, like plunging into a hot
tub. That's how it feels. She's a lot warmer than the night air, her mouth tastes like mint and
chocolate. And you don't think you've ever had a first kiss as good as this. Soft and gentle
and...Devotional.

It's devotion.

Her mouth trails over yours with a care that makes your heart warmer. She may be the steel lady to
other people, lethal, deadly, but around you, she melts. She surrenders. She kisses you as if you
could break at any moment and need to take unconditional care to avoid such a tragedy.

You are not made of glass and as much as you find this behavior touching, you need more. It's
sounding, singing beneath your skin. It's what makes your hands squeeze her shoulders as you run
your tongue along her bottom lip.

She shivered, so palpable, that it made your own body tremble. She understood. She doesn't have
to treat you like crystal. Lilith let go of your face and you barely have time to think before she pulls
you closer to her, one arm embracing your waist as she slips her other hand into the back of your
neck, her nails brushing your scalp.

The first swipe of her tongue at yours almost makes you choke. It's paralyzing. You shudder from
head to toe, the thread wrapping itself around your spine, trembling, begging, and you can swear
she is smiling into your mouth at this reaction.

Her breasts rub against yours. Oh, Titan, you are a damned horrible person. One kiss and you were
slipping, throbbing. But you had waited a long time for this, so this was no time to feel guilty about
anything. Because she's kissing you.
Her. Your mate. The thread stretched across your back trembles gently in recognition. It's her. And
you only want her.

Just consume me. Mouth, tongue, body, and soul.

You have no idea how much time you spend kissing. Just kissing in the middle of a deserted beach.
Long, sweet, leg-softening kisses.

You only know that your mouth is swollen when you pull away. Your breath is short enough for
you to gasp, and your forehead meets hers almost by instinct. She doesn't look any different, but
her fingers still tighten around you, as if afraid that at any moment you might disappear.

Everything seems pretty warm around you now. A hot water bath.

"Would you mind if we stayed like this for a little longer?" It's the first thing she says. As starving
for human touch as you were. You deny with your head, you would never mind doing anything for
her. Your thumbs trace her jaw gently as you try to breathe. It's a good thing she can't read your
thoughts either.

After that, you are quite sure that she has thrown all your self-control away. You are honestly,
truly, and completely in love with her. And you don't know whether it would be very appropriate to
say so on the first date.

You're just delighted to know that she... She's your mate. That's what you need. And even if she
doesn't believe it, you don't think there was anyone more right for you.

You allow yourself to breathe in her scent, to feel her delicate skin, to enjoy her taste on your
tongue. Hearing how her breathing is short. Seeing perfectly well how her eyes are glowing at you.
Your five senses are on her and her alone. You want it to be like that until all that was around you
was her.

You are drowning in Lilith Clawthorne and you don't regret it one bit.

At that moment...You feel that you understand what it is to have a mate.

She is half of your soul, as the poets say.

You believe that if you stop touching her, if you stop feeling her, if you stop listening to her now
you are very likely to die. She is part of you. You are part of her.

And at that moment you also make yourself a promise. If someday you and Lilith go to the human
world, you will show her all the nerdy crap you have ever watched and read, and she will
understand every one of your references.

I am hers and she is mine. From this day, until the end of my days.

You just hope that there is no red wedding on your way.

 Chapter 14
Chapter Summary

The one with a Grudgby game.

"Oh. The lovebirds are back!" Eda practically shouted as soon as you guys walked through the
front door. Wide smile, golden eye shining. She really was expecting you. Eda Clawthorne, the
most chaotic woman you've ever met.

Hooty immediately came from the kitchen and you already heard the sound of Luz's footsteps
coming down the stairs.

"Did she treat you well, Lulu?" You open your mouth indignantly at Hooty. As if you were the one
with a great reputation for mistreating people. The woman next to you could easily kill with a look.
Yet Lilith just smiled before stroking the tube bird's head.

"She was great, Hootsifer. No need to worry." Hooty nodded, eyes narrowed on you, which you
couldn't say didn't freak you out a little. He liked Lilith better than you, it was pretty obvious. But
you don't feel offended. You kind of understand him.

Luz was next. She had a particularly wide smile on her face when she reached you.

"Can you tell me everything now?" She leaned over to whisper to you and a giggle took over your
mouth before your hand ruffled her hair. You leaned over to reach for her ear then.

"Wait for me in my room and I promise I'll tell you everything." The girl smiled broadly, nodding
and then running up the stairs again. King was probably already in bed, it was past his bedtime
anyway. A big baby boy.

"Well?" Eda has an especially suggestive smirk on her face as she looks at her sister and then at
you, arms crossed, eyebrow amusedly raised. She looks really curious as she narrows her eyes in
your direction.

"We had a nice time. I don't know what else you expect to hear." Lilith mutters as she removes her
blazer from her shoulders. The owl lady rolls her eyes hard before sighing.

"I had to be the third wheel enough times to deserve at least a little gossip." You chuckle at that,
but you really don't want to get under the owl lady's gaze as she analyzes your every blush and
stutter. So you just lean over to take Lilith's face in the palm of your hand and then touch your lips
to the corner of hers.

You would prefer the mouth, but that would be a great public display of affection. Probably more
than Lilith would like.

"I'm going upstairs. Good night." Her eyes light up at that, ears moving adorably up and down, and
you have to avoid the urge to want to pinch her nose.

She was adorable. Even more adorable when she reacted to affection she wasn't expecting.
"Good night." She offers you a little wink that trembles the thread in your spine. It's complicit and
slightly amusing, accompanied by that slight smile. You would love to know what she was
thinking, but you sense that it would be something to do with the fact that she would like to drop
you off at your bedroom door.

But Eda wouldn't allow that.

"Oh. I love being the third wheel. It's so cool. And no this is not sarcasm. Not at all." You show
your tongue to Eda before heading towards the stairs. Again not before you hear her speak in a
very loud tone to her sister. "So did you solve the problem with your virgin lips?" You have to
cover your mouth to avoid the laughter that builds up in your throat.

"Get off my back, Eda." She replies, in that same sharp tone, but even just by hearing her voice,
you can feel the smile that is on her face.

Oh if only Eda had known. Those lips were not virgins. Not at all. But you think that's a secret
worth keeping to yourself.

(...)

"You're slowing down, Lily!" You hear Eda shout over her shoulder as she snatches the ball from
her sister's hands and rushes off to the other "net" made on the other side of the clearing, so rapidly
that you feel if you blink you'll miss a move.

You really should have been searching some books to find the stone glyph that Luz wanted so
badly, but suddenly you got distracted. For reasons well known and obvious.

You and Lilith were studying together in the living room. Something that has become quite
common again. Before you used to try to read the same books so that you could discuss with each
other. It was one of your favorite parts of the day. Now Lilith reads aloud to you and asks your
opinion about it. Hooty wrapped around her waist, his head gently resting on her lap. She reads
exceptionally well and you love the way her voice sounds.

You sit on the living room floor and research glyph after glyph, information about portals, and also
about the subjects Luz was learning at Hexide. Lilith still thinks it's cheating, but she loves
revisiting the things she learned in her teenage years.

That afternoon, Eda came into the living room with an apple blood mug and a classic "nerds"
before sitting down on the couch.

Anyway, you have no idea who started it, but eventually, Lilith and Eda were teasing each other
again. Eda challenged her to a game of grudgby, whoever lost would have to wear the shame hat
for the rest of the day...And wash the dinner dishes. You didn't care a lot about sports, to be
honest, you used to watch the NFL with your dad sometimes. He rooted for the Dolphins. But it's
not really something that had your attention, you were more of an arts girl than a sports girl. So you
intended to try to continue studying glyphs and maybe finally get the stone glyph.

But...The whole sports thing suddenly got incredibly interesting when Eda and Lilith came
downstairs in their uniforms.

Shorts. Shorts. You don't know how you didn't collapse.

Lilith Clawthorne was wearing blue shorts with white hems. She had...Pretty long legs. Pretty
shapely legs.
They were also wearing matching team jackets, just like the jackets of human football players,
Lilith's had an "L" embroidered on the left side of her chest and Eda's had an "E", plus a little star
on the right side. She was the star of the team, you remember. Both had their hair tied up in
ponytails, with only the smaller strands loose to frame their faces, which made Lilith's white streak
a lot more evident. They also wore knee pads, fingerless gloves, and matching spiked shoes.

Eda was the first to leave, stretching her arms behind her back in the clearing outside.

And you kept staring at Lilith. Perfectly aware that your gay panic was nearly about to strike.
Legs. Beautiful legs. Oh Titan she has beautiful legs. She has beautiful thighs.

"Seeing something you like?" That was all she said as she approached with a small suggestive
smile, her eyes sparkling. She was so aware of her effect, wasn't she? Damn woman. Your face
heated up so quickly from staring that it made the witch laugh out loud. She tilted her head gently
to the side before curling her fingers around your chin and then placing a kiss on your cheek, quite
warm, her breath hitting your face with the same warmth.

She left then. Leaving you, your jelly legs, and your red face in the living room.

That's why you couldn't study anymore. A kiss. A damn kiss on the cheek. One more suggestive
smile and she made you so uncomfortable in your own body and between your legs that you could
barely read a paragraph without getting lost.

That's why you decided to go watch the game since you wouldn't be productive studying. Hooty
was making the obstacles. King was scoring. Eda was winning with two points of advantage. But
were you really looking at her? No. Not really.

"Hey, Y/N!" Your eyes depart from the field only to see Luz arrive from Hexide. The colorful
uniform was always so lovely in your eyes. She gets off from Eda's staff and immediately has to
duck her head to dodge a ball that the owl lady had thrown. She yells a "Sorry, kiddo" over her
shoulder before running after the ball that Lilith had now caught. "What the hell are they doing?"
She asks as soon as she stands beside you, away from the splash area.

"Playing to see who will be wearing the shame hat...And washing the dinner dishes." Luz laughs
softly as she shakes her head negatively. You understand the reaction. They could be very childish
when they wanted to be. Two grown women who couldn't miss an opportunity to tease each other
and yet who loved each other so strongly that they would give their lives for one another without a
second thought.

That must be how having a sibling feels like.

"And you, what are you doing?" You look at Lilith running, already accumulating sweat and then
smiling wide as she dodged an air attack from Hooty, jumping to a nonhuman height to hit the net,
scoring another point. Your heart beats a little faster just by seeing her running so fast and so
nicely. Her legs flexing, those very shapely thighs already glistening with sweat. You don't even
notice as you swallow dry.

Your head thought hard about "watching porn," but you just chuckled at that idea before looking at
Luz.

"I was searching about the stone glyph. But it turned out that I got distracted." Luz raises both
eyebrows at you in a familiar "who do you think you're fooling?" look that makes you laugh. She
was as perceptive as Eda.
"Do you think they'll be long? I need to talk to Eda." You frown slightly at her, a silent doubt, and
Luz smiles broadly. "I want to invite Willow, Gus, and Amity to a slumber party this weekend."
You like the idea. Having the girls at the Owl House is always enjoyable, as is having Gus. You
liked Willow because she seemed sweet but hid a lot of strength inside. And you liked Amity
because she reminded you a lot of Lilith, she was a good girl and she had a crush on your little
sister. A great point. And Gus was a cutie, kind, and always curious about everything.

"JUST ONE MORE PLAY!" King announced, waving the pom-poms in his hands. His
intimidation armor was a cheerleading uniform. You almost choke when you remember it. The
score was perfectly even, 7 to 7.

You look at Luz and offer her a wink before turning your eyes back to the field. The moment of
truth.

The Clawthorne sisters face each other in the center of the field and you can't help but notice again
how much they look alike, especially when they were wearing similar outfits.

"GO EDA!" Shouts Luz next to you which makes the owl lady smile widely as she stretches her
shoulders and stares at Lilith with an almost sneering smirk.

"Wanna bet I make you embarrass yourself in front of your girlfriend?" Eda asked as she rested her
hands on her knee pads. The "g" word echoes and sounds particularly nice to your ears. It makes
them warm up slightly too and your heart races a little more.

Lilith's girlfriend. Is that what you are now?

Lilith looks at you for only a brief second before she gets back into the game. You don't even have
time to wave, she's focused. Hands resting on her knees, exposed skin glistening with sweat. Oh
Gosh. She looks so gorgeous.

Hooty slides between them with the ball landing on his head.

"Oh, little sister." And how her voice sounds like velvet now, perfectly balanced. The wind blows
stronger and refreshes your ears, but it also carries Lilith's hair away from her face, which allows
you to notice how she's grinning with the corner of her lips now. "If you only knew what a
Pandora's box you've just opened." And you barely have time to blink.

Hooty throws the ball up and the two of them jump extremely high to reach it. Eda is the one who
catches it. She's faster than Lilith. You hear her growl from the other side of the field and all your
hair stands on end. Eda's running, very, incredibly fast. She's going to get that point. Her focus is
impressive, both of them were awfully good at this game so it was at least interesting to watch who
would win. Who would be the first to slip up and end up losing to their sister?

Hooty is the one who stops Eda from an immediate point, he spreads himself to form a big hole in
the ground with his mouth, which Eda is chuckling as she jumps over it. Now all she has to do is
jump to the net and game over.

However, she barely has time to land on the ground next to the pole. Lilith is upon her in the next
second. You hadn't even seen her approach, you hadn't even had time to see her run that far. She
slams against her sister's body. They both roll on the field with the force of the impact, but neither
seems to be hurt, considering Eda is laughing as Lilith takes the ball from her hand.

Your eyes widen and her heart races even more. She looks so good in her own skin as she runs with
a ball in her hand and a giggle in her mouth. You can't help but imagine what it was like when they
were young, how these two were always ready to kick the shit out of any team that tried to take on
Hexide.

"If only I had known all I had to do was threatening your reputation!" Eda teases as Lilith runs to
the other side of the field. The owl lady takes only a second to stand and run after her.

Lilith doesn't turn away not even for a second. She runs and runs and breathes, perfectly. She's not
as fast as Eda, but she has the advantage of the counterattack. And when Hooty forms a huge wall
of obstacles, she doesn't hesitate. She jumps up and grabs the edge tightly, propelling herself
upward. With. One. Single. Arm.

Wow.

Eda reaches the wall at the moment Lilith jumps from it to the net. For a moment you are
completely sure that she is flying, time seems to stand still a bit as Lilith moves her arm back and
then forward, throwing the ball into the net. It hits so hard that it rips the strings, the little ball
bounces away from the field. If it was on fire you don't even think you'd be surprised.

Wow. You believe you're barely breathing now.

Lilith...Lilith was impressive. In many ways. She wasn't just an intelligent witch with great skill in
magic. She wasn't just a beautiful woman with long, shapely legs that would probably colonize
your dreams for the rest of your life. She is a grudgby player who can easily snap someone's head
in half with her bare hands.

Jokes on you, I'm into that shit.

"Wow!" Luz repeated out loud and you laughed at how she practically read your mind.

"GAME OVER! And the older one got the better of us this time!" Announced King with a sigh of
disappointment, his pom-poms low. Even upset he was cute in that little outfit.

"It was a good game, sis." Eda doesn't seem the least bit upset that she lost. She's smiling, the
sweat glistening on her forehead as she slips an arm across Lilith's shoulders.

"Just wash the dishes, I don't care about the hat." Eda giggles and nods. Something tells you that
she would have made Lilith wear the hat if she had won.

They walk slowly towards you.

The two sisters look quite ruined after that game. Sweaty, dirty, and quite tired. Not that you were
complaining. They both look even more beautiful. Throw a little more dirt on them you are sure
they would only look even more attractive.

"Eda, a word." Luz hops excitedly beside her and the owl lady nods, releasing her sister to slip an
arm around the girl's shoulders, directing her into the house.

"Inside, kiddo. I need some apple blood or I'm going to die in the next 10 minutes." Eda said as she
waved her remaining hand.

"I want something cold. Like my heart." King got another laugh out of you as he accompanied the
two into the house, jumping and raising his little paws in the air.

Hooty was the only one staring at you two with genuine interest.
"Hootcifer can you make sure Eda doesn't take all the apple blood, please?" She rubs the head of
the bird who nods.

"Hoot, I will keep your apple blood, Lulu, hoot." He almost promises those words to himself
before he goes. You hope he doesn't hurt anyone in an attempt to keep Lilith's apple blood.

And then it's you. Just you.

Oh, Titan.

She looks beautiful. Hair a little messy, clothes crumpled, sweat exuding from her pores, face and
pointed ears red, breathing still a little short. And the shorts. Gosh, the shorts. Those shorts would
be the reason for your collapse in the near future. Why did she have to have such a great pair of
legs?

"When are you going to play a match with me?" There is a rather suggestive smile at the corner of
her lips when she asks that question. Her eyes glittering with knowledge when she comes just close
enough to be exactly facing you, arms crossed under her chest. You take a deep breath, but what
reaches you is her perfume, tulips, forest, and sweat. Your fingers curl to touch her, and you almost
can't control the urge. How could it be like this? Does she only need to be around you for you to
barely be able to think?

"I don't think I can do...That." You point at the field with slightly deepened eyebrows. You could
barely make a three-point basket in high school, you can't imagine trying to score points by
dodging magical obstacles and running and using nonhuman strength to throw a ball.

"Oh, come on. I can teach you." She's grinning more now, eyebrows raised slightly in silent
teasing. You are not imagining it when you notice that her pupils look quite dilated. She seems to
be exuding a rather warm heat now. You frown slightly because she also seems to be exuding a
very specific kind of feeling.

Was it just you, or was Lilith a little aroused for winning a game? Well, you were certainly almost
gasping to see her like that, but you don't think that all this warmth and restlessness comes only
from you. These emotions are not yours alone.

Oh, you can imagine that. She is too competitive not to feel a great excitement for winning
something. Her heart must have been still racing, adrenaline coursing through her veins, pumping
into her brain and making her thoughts especially quick and focused on only one thing, and it
wasn't running, it wasn't fighting either. Associate this with the fact that she was sweating and
wearing light clothing.

This woman is horny and you are not sure how not to feel stimulated by it. Lilith's needy and how
could you not take advantage of that?

"Do you want to teach me, Lilith?" You raise an eyebrow, a provocative smile expanding across
your mouth. You could be a little brat. It's about time she got to know this side of you. The side
that teases, the side that seems unafraid to have a hand wrapped around their throat.

It's so easy to watch her eyes darken, her breathing changing pace. Had you hit a spot there? The
thread stretched down your spine says yes, it trembles softly and the heat seems to rise. At some
point, you would get used to these little tugs, but now it's just fun to watch her lose a little self-
control.

"Don't smile at me like that." She warns, crossing her arms more tightly under her chest. You can
feel the slight discomfort exuding from her in waves. She's trying to restrain herself. She probably
doesn't want you to notice how she is in a rather delicate situation. Well...You had already figured
it out so what's the problem?

"Why?" And when you ask the question, you try to look as innocent as possible, eyes downcast,
chaste smile. Which only makes the witch narrow her eyes in your direction. You wonder if she
was already noticing your poor tricks.

"It makes me desperately want to kiss you...Rude." Your fingers tremble. You feel the heat rise
quickly to your cheeks but also rest gently on your stomach, pulling to the middle of your legs.
Something throbs just at how her voice sounds, a little too husky. That woman and that damned
voice.

"And who's stopping you?" You barely have time to finish the sentence before she grabs your
wrist. She looks straight into your eyes before smirking in a way that made your internal muscles
tighten. Her hand is gloved, but her fingers are warm and grip tightly.

You don't even think of not following her.

There is a shed just off the porch of the Owl House. Lilith pulls open the heavy wooden door as
easily as she would open a plastic thing.

You don't have a chance to get used to the objects around you, or the lack of light before she grabs
you.

Her mouth meets yours before her hands do. And it's like feeling a shock. A strong shock that
shakes your whole body.

Her lips feel like they are on fire, so heated, and her fingers sink into your hips hard enough to
mark you. You think that maybe you want her to mark you. To claim you, to mark you. Isn't that
what the bond meant? You were hers, she was yours.

You lean on her shoulders, getting some support before she pushes you against the nearest wall.
Your back slams against the hard surface, but it doesn't hurt, not really. What's on your back is cold
and hard, but what's in front of you is soft and warm, you think you can handle that so well.

When her tongue slides into your mouth, your knees become weak. The thread trembles enough
now to feel a little odd, it seems to want more. It seems to beg as much as possible for more of her
touch, for her hands all over your body.

You need it so badly that it hurts, it scratches.

You drag your fingers down the back of her neck. Lilith shudders, palpably, trembling. Her grip
increases around you, and you barely have time to process the fact of how her body is pressed
against yours before she slides her thigh between your legs.

Oh.

You weren't expecting this. But you certainly enjoyed it. The thread tensed as you felt like horrible
person for being soaked with a simple gesture. It's her skin, hot and sweaty. If you weren't wearing
damn sweatpants you could feel her warmth so well.

Oh crap.

She pulls her lips apart, only to have her mouth travel down your throat delicately, soft kisses that
feel more like brushing lips. Each one making a different shiver run through your entire body. Your
fingers sink into the back of her head, her hair smooth as silk strands, your breath panting more and
more with each second.

You feel your legs almost fail as she runs her tongue gently along your jugular vein as if mapping
where your heartbeat could be felt. A short, gasping breath comes out of her nose. And it's at that
moment that she sinks her teeth into your pulse point.

All your skin creeps in a way that makes your spine shiver, you choke back a whine as your hips
jump forward to meet her. Her thigh is firmly in place now, pressing into the perfect spot. Oh, this
is hard. You can already feel the wetness accumulating.

"Was that a moan I heard?" Her question makes your body squirm even more. She runs her nose
along your earlobe, her voice sounding perfectly against your skin, making your face become a red
hot mess. "Oh Titan, you are beautiful." She whispers and you open your eyes to face her. Her eyes
look very feline now. It seems that the little sound was her breaking point. She seems on the verge
of breaking you in half or else claiming you. Silver, green, pupils dilated, gasping for breath, her
body so pressed against yours that you can easily feel her heartbeat. "Harder or softer?" You
should have assumed that this woman would be a monster in a bed, right? Well, you didn't. You
hadn't even considered what Lilith would be like in bed.

Well. You already had an answer.

"Harder." And she's smiling almost murderously as she leans in to take your lips again.

A dangerous woman. You think as you crumble under the control she has over the kiss. She's a
dangerous woman, and it has nothing to do with the spells she can do, the weapons she can wield,
the strength she has. It has to do with the way she raises a hand to sink into your hair, scraping her
nails into your scalp. With the way, she is pressing her thigh firmly against your center. With the
way, she is pressing her hand against your hip to put even more pressure. With the way, she is
consuming your mouth in a kiss long enough to make your head swim.

You feel a tremendous will to touch her skin as your own scratches and begs. Your fingers leave
her hair to reach her hips and when your fingertips find the bare skin beneath her shirt she growls.
She really growls, a sound relatively similar to what the raven beast would make. It chills your
bones. It makes you jump against her thigh. She seems even more energetic now, pressing against
you hard enough that you feel your legs begin to tremble, your back rubbing against the hard
surface of the wall.

But you follow her step, each stroke of her tongue on yours, each missed breath, each slightly
stronger pressure between your legs. The golden thread is pulsing now, and so is the middle of
your legs, both of which seem to be searching for the same desperate release.

This is going to explode.

It's so close. If she moves her thigh one more time if she presses just a little harder on you. The
thread is extremely tense. That's it. It will break.

"Lilith." And when her name comes out between your lips in a worried tone, she pulls her mouth
away from yours at the same moment. Her eyes meet yours, slightly alarmed, for any sign that you
didn't want to. It's touching the way she can go from beastly to soft with just one word from you.
"The bond." You warn her and she takes a deep breath, trying to grasp your words, trying to get
back into that world probably. She doesn't even seem too surprised that you know that this kind of
more intense interaction would make the bond consummate. "If you keep going I will..." Your ears
burn a bit and you think "come" hoping she might understand. You could still be embarrassed
about the most basic things.

"Oh..." Her breath is short against your face, hot and panting. She looks at your pressed bodies
with interest. Her thigh seems to have a perfect fit between your legs. "Do you think it will be
consummated if you come?" You close your legs out of pure reflex when you hear her voice say
"come". Damn husky voice.

You have no idea, it's not like you had a lot of knowledge about mating relationships in the boiling
isles. All you knew was what Eda had told you and what that thread stretching down your spine
told you from time to time. The tension was easing now that you were not so much on the edge.

"I have no idea, the thread was tense enough to break." Lilith frowns slightly, her breathing slowly
returning to normal, as did her pupils.

"Okay...Our next mission is to study up on this before we do anything." You nod, a little unsteady,
a little airy, certainly extremely shaky.

Lilith giggles, an amused laugh, placing one last chaste kiss on your lips. She then pulls away. The
lack of her warmth now is almost a bother that sings under your skin, it would have been so easy,
just a little bit more.

"Does that mean I affect you like that?" You nudge her shoulders, rolling your eyes as she laughs
louder.

Your ears are red, because yes...She affects you a lot. Enough to make you want to come inside
your clothes and consummate a mating bond without even thinking twice.

You needed a cold shower before you started looking for books about this thing on your back that
have just cockblocked you.
 Chapter 15
Chapter Summary

The one with a slumber party.

You had big plans for your university years. You wanted to get a job, move out of your parents'
house, and rent an apartment. Then you would start thinking about your career plan. You thought
that maybe you could write professionally, or even become a university professor. Dating was not
in your plans, you didn't even like anyone.

But do you know what else wasn't in your plans? Being kicked out of your home, falling into a
world completely different from your own, being welcomed by the people of the Owl House, and
then finding out that the person you were meant to be with was...Lilith Clawthorne.

Falling into this world brought numerous surprises. You found out that you are good with spells,
even though you are human. You found out that witch milkshakes could be surprisingly delicious.
And you didn't have to worry due to the fact they didn't use milk.

Also, you discovered, when you fell into this world, that dating Lilith could be one of the most
extraordinary things that ever happened to you.

She is a very peculiar kind of girlfriend, which you named soft-hot. She had these two spectrums
inside her. She is that kind of girlfriend who will learn how to make hot chocolate the way you like
it and give you a kiss on the forehead when she hands it to you while you read about deals in the
demon realm on the living room couch. But also the kind of girlfriend who can easily push you into
the nearest dark corner to steal a breathtaking kiss, sliding her thigh between your legs when she
needed you and couldn't help herself. She noticed, quite clearly the effect her legs have on you, as
well as her voice, her fingers. Well, Lilith is a very attentive girlfriend.

Soft-hot. You loved that combination with everything in you. And you were never going to
complain, but it was a hard thing to deal with when you hadn't decided yet what to do with the
information you had.

Another thing you discovered is that there were several books about mating bonds.

You and Lilith had spent the whole week studying about this. You had been getting books and
books about old agreements in the demon realm from the library, as well as about relationships and
bonds in general. Some were in different languages so that only Lilith could read. But most of the
time you were able to help her with the research and it was particularly fascinating research if you
were honest. The first records of mating bonds go back thousands of years, it's an extremely old
bond and you have no idea how humans have just been ignoring it for millennia.
Sure there are legends about soul mates since the world is a world. But nothing tangible, nothing
like the boiling isles put together in complete volumes.

You got the information you needed from a fairly recent book, actually, that had more in-depth
studies on magical covenants. Some pretty interesting pictures made you feel like a girl in sixth
grade with her first anatomy book. The thread is something interesting, not everyone has it but it's
something relatively common. Anyway, for the mating bond to be consummated, the mates must
come together. If one of the mates makes the other come without themselves coming it won't make
the bond consummate to pieces but the moment of consummation may be weaker. You regretted
not letting go that day for sure.

There are stronger and weaker mating bonds. Only the mates can tell how connected they are to
each other. You almost raised your eyebrows as Lilith read this part aloud. You hadn't even
consummated the bond yet and you could feel her emotions perfectly, sometimes even hear her
thoughts. It was pretty obvious that your bond wasn't poor in any way. Also, and this reminded you
of that day at the Knee, other witches can tell the bond by the smell. Not exactly the perfume, but
more like the natural smell of two mates becomes quite similar.

In the end, you decided that quickies would not be an option. Lilith wanted the consummation to be
perfect, and you couldn't deny that you wanted it too. It was an old bond, and as difficult as it was,
you didn't want to waste it because of your sexual urges.

So you chose to wait. The perfect opportunity. Not the wedding, for the Titan's sake, you don't
think you can hold out until next week.

"Please, Eda, pleeeeeaaaaaase. I swear, we won't make a mess, we'll sleep in the living room and
no one will touch anything." You take your eyes off the fantasy novel about the human world you
were reading, Luz's recommendation, to the scene unfolding in front of you. Luz had been begging
all week for Eda to let the children come to the slumber party. The owl lady believed she would
forget about it by the end of the week, which she didn't.

"Okay, fine. As long as their parents agree. I don't want Odalia Blight, in my house, announcing
that I kidnapped her daughter. Okay?!" Luz nods with a small, soft smile. Odalia
Blight...Considering her last name you believe she is Amity's mother. But it's not something you
pay much attention to.

As soon as she is out of Eda's vision, Luz does a little dance of joy before running up the stairs,
which makes you chuckle.

It's almost night, you figure the guys will be here soon.

"I'm going upstairs and have a shower. I'll be right back to help you with some snacks." Eda puts
her hands together as if pretending a prayer when you get up from the couch.
"What would I be without you?" You chuckle as you squeeze the owl lady's shoulder.

"Probably a woman with five kids at home and no snacks." Eda twitches her lips in agreement.
You close your book with the bookmark and then head toward the stairs.

When you reach the second floor, you sense that Lilith is still in her room, probably studying. You
should warn her that there will be three more teenagers in the house in a few hours. You say that
this is the only reason to go knocking on her door, but internally you know that this is a lie. Any
excuse to see her for a few minutes.

Lilith opens the door almost before you remove your fist from the wood. She has some red paint
smeared on her cheek and is wearing classic pajamas with a Dragon Ball Z blouse. She's smiling,
teeth and all, and you frown slightly, but don't even have time to ask before she grabs your wrist
and pulls you inside.

"I figured it out." Your eyebrows pronounce a little more as she bounces near her desk. She was in
the soft mood now, soft and cheerful. You look at what she was doing. There are open books, on
geography and relief, as well as some discarded glyph drawings, some papers with her elegant
handwriting. But what catches your eye are the two papers placed perfectly in the center of the
table. The drawing is pretty similar to the one you saw with Luz at the Knee, but complete. A
circle, with a square in the middle and another smaller circle inside, and two lines cutting through
it, one horizontally and one vertically. "Try it!" she asks, putting one of the papers in your hand.
"But on the floor." She points to a recent scratch on her desk that wasn't there before.

You kneel and look at her once more with that childlike excitement before you touch the glyph.
The familiar tingle rises up your arm as the design rises in gold. And so the paper crumbles to
make way for a massive ball of stone that weighs down on the floor.

"It worked!" Lilith bounces more behind you and you can't help but smile. It really did work, a
stone glyph, Luz would be fascinated with it. Maybe not as much as Lilith was. You can almost
feel her excitement in the air, and how happy she is to have finally figured it out.

She helps you to stand again and then she grabs the remaining paper, probably to run after her
teacher and show her what she has discovered. But you hold her by the hand.

"Luz has invited Willow, Gus, and Amity to a slumber party." Lilith frowns slightly and then
smiles.

"Can you make that cake again?" You shake your head in promise with a small smile spreading on
your mouth.

"Sure." And she grins so broadly at such a simple thing that it makes your heart swell in your chest.
"I'm helping Eda with the snacks." Lilith nodded and leaned over to place a quick, warm kiss on
your cheek.
"I'll show this to Luz!" You giggled as she came out in small steps and bounds into Luz's room.
She could be extremely adorable when she wanted to be.

It's so hard to just not grab her and not let anyone else touch her. She is the sunshine that you didn't
want anyone else to feel.

(...)

The kids arrived just as you and Eda were trying to figure out if you should bake fairy pies together
with human cakes. You heard the sound of the door slamming and numerous voices at once, that's
how you knew there were 5 kids in the house now.

"Hey, guys." You greet as you arrive in the living room. Gus waves energetically at you, Willow
smiles with her eyes closed and Amity just grins with the corner of her mouth. You can't help but
think that the way someone smiles says a lot about that person's personality.

"Do not destroy my house, thank you." It was Eda's greeting that made Luz slap her hand against
her own face and you let out a low chuckle.

"Come on! You won't believe it." Luz takes Amity's hand lightheartedly as she pulls her and her
friends into the main room. "Lilith discovered a stone glyph, which ultimately demonstrated how
our trip to the Knee was not in vain." Amity went increasingly red as she was led into the house
and you had to lower your face to laugh.

They were adorable. Watching them interact would be one of your favorite things about that event.

"Sometimes I think I should try to give them a little push." Eda whispers beside you and you turn
to her with frowning eyebrows and narrowed eyes.

"And didn't you think to give your sister a little push?" Eda rolls her eyes hard before starting her
path to the kitchen, the sound of children starting some sort of game is quite evident.

"You guys are adults. I should have punched each of you to establish my dominance in the
sisterhood." It's your turn to roll your eyes briefly before accompanying her into the kitchen. "You
know, I never had a younger sister." She is grinning broadly as she looks at you now, wiggling her
eyebrows rather suggestively. "I wonder what kind of pranks you would fall for. It was always so
hard with Lilith. She's just too smart." You stand in your spot on the countertop to start making
some sandwiches and give the owl lady a particularly disbelieving look.

"Thank you for insulting my intelligence and threatening me in the same sentence. I already feel
like part of the family." Eda laughs out loud before stroking your shoulder, amber eye glowing gold
as she leans against the counter.
"It's actually incredibly nice to have you here." You smile, but find it breaking in the middle,
because your heart seems to swell and break a little at the same time. You're not sure how long it's
been since you've been truly wanted somewhere. "Well, I'll go find mattresses for the invaders.
Can you handle the cooking by yourself?" You just wave your hand. Cooking also relieves the
head and you don't mind, you enjoy.

Eda gives you a knowing pat on the shoulder before she leaves.

You smile when you hear laughter around the house.

It's really nice to feel wanted. It feels really good to feel happy maybe for the first time in...who
knows how long.

(...)

Cooking things specifically for witches was not your specialty, but it wasn't that bad. You had a
recipe book and material to work with.

You are just finishing making some particularly healthy human sandwiches for you and Luz when
Lilith enters the kitchen. You don't even see her. You feel when she enters the room as if the thread
knew she was near, signaling where she was. You feel like a whale with sonar every time this
happens. Her perfume comes to you next, stronger after the bath, warmer. It's refreshing and seems
to calm your mind.

She hugs your waist just for a moment to kiss your cheek and then goes towards the refrigerator.

It's such a simple gesture and yet you can't stop your heart from beating a little faster. It's simple,
but at the same time, it's almost involuntary. It's involuntary caring, it's routine.

"We should have made plans. I don't think I ever had that many teenagers in a house." You chuckle
at this as she rolls her eyes rather dramatically. Considering the voices coming from the living
room, you guess they are arguing about which type of magic is the best. Luz's response was the
most obvious, "all together."

"Stop. Willow and Gus are great and I know you like Amity or you wouldn't have been her tutor."
It's a good thing that Luz had talked so much about her crush because it granted you quite a bit of
information about your girlfriend as well.

Lilith leans against the counter and only then do your eyes go to her. She's wearing a black sweater
and soft fabric pants that look so good on her legs. Her hair is tied up in a bun, the smaller strands
framing her face, and she is sipping a glass of apple blood. Long fingers tapping their nails
rhythmically against the wood.
When you look at her like that...It's hard not to think that choosing to wait for the perfect
opportunity was a shitty move. You could just go up to the second floor now, lock yourselves in
her room and consummate this bond. The possibility is very tempting. And she is too tempting. Oh
how you were tempted every goddamn second by that most appraising look, by those black painted
lips, by that long neck, by that too white skin that seemed to be asking to be marked, by her fingers,
her voice, those legs that she knew how to hide so well.

You don't know how you managed to supervise your self-control for so long.

"Stop staring at me." She says as she turns the rest of the red liquid in her mouth, without removing
her eyes from you. You feel the hint of her smile as she washes the glass in the sink, even though
you don't see it.

"Does it make you nervous when I stare?" You answer with a slightly raised eyebrow, humor
dripping through your voice. She looks at you over your shoulder, her gray eye glinting silver in
knowledge. You were playing with fire here, and you knew it.

She takes a breath and then reaches over casually to lean her hip against the side of where you are
making the sandwiches. You watch as her eyes travel across your face, down your neck, across
your torso, and down your legs. Shameless. You swallow hard as she stares at you like a prey she
intends to eat on her nest. Her gaze lingers on your hips before she slowly returns to your face. Her
eyes seem darker, pupils slightly dilated, but bright, like a night bird. She smiles, just softly,
running her tongue along the corner of her mouth. You can't stop the shiver that runs down your
spine.

"You look just about good enough to eat over that counter." You feel any witty response of yours
get stuck in your throat. Oh. What an image she has just given you. Your ears are on fire and you
have to lower your head because your whole face feels so hot. She, between your legs, against the
rough wood, her mouth on you, the hair falling in her face, the smell of sweat. Uh. You have to
stop yourself from squeezing your thighs together.

Your inner muscles tighten and you find your fingers trembling around the slices of bread.

Lilith lets out a graceful laugh before leaning over just enough to be in front of your face. She
reaches out to lift your chin with the tip of her index finger.

"What's the matter, my darling? I thought you liked teasing." This is the first time she has used a
possessive pronoun with you. Your whole body trembles. Her voice has a slight tone of amusement
as her breath feels really warm against your own lips. You again watch her eyes play between your
mouth and your own eyes.

Your heart could easily escape through your mouth. How does she manage this? She had barely
touched you and your breathing was already failing.

"Lilith..." It was the middle of the kitchen. Anyone could enter, including one of the five kids who
were currently in the house. It was not a safe place for that kind of interaction. But do you control
your body or your mind at that moment? No. She surrounds you, she sinks her claws into you so
difficult that it's extremely hard to have a coherent thought when she is close like that.

"Shh..." She whispers getting close enough to lean her mouth against yours "Let me kiss you." And
when she speaks in that tone, with those glowing eyes you don't think you can stop yourself.

Her lips fall over yours and you dissolve around her. She seems like a mist, slowly penetrating
around you until she has taken you completely inside her.
You think you might as well be consumed. You don't care.

A weak sigh leaves your nose and you wrap your arms around her neck before kissing her back. It
always feels more intense than the last time, and it always feels like you can never get enough of
her. She thrusts herself against you, her nails sinking into the counter exactly beside your waist, but
not touching you except with her mouth.

She's teasing you. You know it. You feel it.

You pull her by the shoulders, trying to feel more of her, trying to stop the pulse that is growing
stronger against your skin. The shorter strands of hair rub against your knuckles.

Lilith lets out a giggle against your mouth before pulling your bottom lip between her teeth.

"It's my entertainment to watch your face turn so red." She whispers as she wraps her hand around
your chin. You're trembling, aren't you? She has such an effect on you. You are so easily malleable
around her it's ridiculous. "Is it good when I kiss you?" You find yourself choking, but the answer
doesn't seem to come anyway. This woman. She knows what her voice does to your nerves, she
knows perfectly well what her mouth on yours does.

She is learning so well how to take you out of your ordinary state.

She is so aware of the power she has over you and she enjoys every second of it.

"Lilith..." It's just her name and she leans into the sound, breathing deeply against your face. Your
thumbs trace her jawline, warm and firm, you want her mouth on yours again so badly it feels like
it hurts under your skin. "Please..." She may want to tease you, but she seems to be as weak to your
requests as you are to hers. Because in the next second she slams her mouth on yours again, her
hands sinking to your hips.

The world disappears. It's just her mouth, consuming yours. It's just her hair between your fingers.
It's just her body so pressed to yours that you can feel her heartbeat, it's quite racing, as is her
breath on your face, quite irregular. You feel her thrust her hips between your legs, almost pushing
you to sit on the counter. You thrust forward to try to climb up.

"Hm-hm!" The intrusive sound makes you jump away from her, slamming your hips against the
counter, hard enough to hurt. You almost whimper with the pain spreading through the sensible
bone. It's a loud enough throat-clearing sound that makes your heart pound at the possibility of Luz
or Amity or Gus or Willow...Oh Titan, don't let it be King.

But it's pure relief that takes your bones when you turn around, there is no kid. And you let out the
breath you didn't even realize you were holding. It's Eda who is standing in the archway, with two
sleeping bags under her arms.

"Get a room, you two. For the titan's sake and for my sake." She rolls her eyes and you lower your
head, feeling your ears reasonably warm, you don't know if it's need or if it's shame. Maybe a little
of both.

"Sorry." You mutter, and Lilith just lets out a mischievous giggle before turning away from you to
grab a tray of the snacks you had already made.

"Let's take that before you burst with shame." You really want to finger-flick her on the head
because she was the one who started it in the first place, but she is already too far away for you to
reach so you just take the other tray of cakes and candies and follow her into the living room.
The kids have already made a real mess. There are books in a lot of places, plants that Willow
seems to have grown to demonstrate something, board games, and lots of little clothes scattered
about. You frown until you realize that they are playing dress-up games with King in different
outfits. He was currently dressed like a supermodel on the red carpet, lipstick and all.

You let out a chuckle before placing the tray on the coffee table, taking a seat next to Lilith on the
couch. She just gives you a little wink, to which you respond by pushing her shoulders slightly.

"So..." Eda begins, dropping the sleeping bags on the floor and rubbing her fingers across her
forehead. She seemed to be having the time of her life. "One of you will have to sleep on the couch
I only found two mattresses in my junk rooms." You frown slightly and you don't even see it when
you speak.

"I sleep on the couch. You guys take mine, no problem." It's only one night and you really don't see
a problem because you have slept in harsher places than Eda's couch. The bed in your
grandmother's summer house looked like a board stretched out on springs and they are kids, they
are growing up, they need a mattress more than you do.

Slumber parties are also more fun when you all sleep together. And you didn't want to run the risk
of Amity sleeping on the couch and Luz missing the opportunity to stare into her eyes until sleep.

"You may sleep with me." And it's as if someone has simply silenced the room.

An embarrassing and extremely unannounced silence spreads through the room in a way that
makes your whole body feel very warm and all your hair stands on end. Your ears feel a little numb
as well.

Amity, Willow, Luz, Gus, and King stop whatever they are doing to look back at you and then at
Lilith and what she just said. You hear Eda let out a not-so-discreet muffled laugh.

If your face was red before, it burns now. Lilith just told you to sleep with her. Sleep with her. Oh.
Your fingers look very interesting now.

"Willow and Guz take the remaining sleep bags, Luz with the one in her room, Amity with yours,
and you with me." You bite your lips hard enough to draw blood, feeling your ears complain from
how hot they are. Your heart begins to beat faster, a lot faster. Gosh, could anyone see it beating
through your blouse?

More importantly. Could Lilith feel what you were feeling right now?

"Okay." You say even if you are panicking and your face is so hot right now that you think you
might turn into a human tomato.

Well, you were waiting for the perfect opportunity and it sort of...Happened? There was no reason
for you to sneak into Lilith's room in the middle of the night and now...There is? The adrenaline
seems to run pretty rapidly throughout your body now, your limbs are at the point for you to run
out the front door.

"What is that cake made of?" It's Gus who cuts through this extremely awkward moment around
you and you take a second to get back into this background to answer him.

"It's chocolate." You reply, more out of orbit than usual.

Titan. You're going to have a breakdown.

"Come pick a wine with me." Her voice sounds low, low enough so that even if everyone was
around you, only you could hear. Your head moves affirmatively, but you are not sure if you really
respond.

She grabs your fingers and you think that she sort of carries you back to the kitchen, while Eda
throws herself on the couch, eyes following you with interest. She's probably wondering if you are
going to desecrate her kitchen counter again.

You lean against the kitchen wall, trying to breathe as best you can, trying not to freak out. It's
Lilith. It's just Lilith. She's not going to do anything you don't want her to do.

The problem is that you want to and you have no idea how to have sex with someone you really
care about. Oh, your first time should have been like this, nervous, worried.

You hear her rummaging through the small wine cellar that Eda has behind the cupboards. She
really seems to be choosing. Anyway, her taste in drinks was better than yours, so you don't even
think about interfering.

When she comes back to where you can see, she has a dark glass bottle and three glasses in her
hands. Why are you panicking anyway?

It's Lilith, for fuck's sake. It's your mate. Probably the person you've most trusted your whole life.
You're not sure if you've ever trusted any friends, except for the people who lived in this house.
And you certainly trust any of them more than you ever trusted your parents.

You trust her more than you trust yourself. Even in bestial form, you simply know that she won't
hurt you. That doesn't stop the thread on your back from coiling, curling, and screaming under your
skin.

The witch opens the bottle on the table and then pours just one of the glasses with reddish liquid
before approaching you again. Your fingers reach up almost on their own to hold the goblet. Lilith
tilts her head then, just enough so that she can look into your eyes without having to lean in.

"You know I'm not insinuating anything, right?" Your eyes rise to her and her head returns to its
normal angle. Your heart seems to swell a little in your chest just from looking at her and you're not
sure why that happens. "I want you to sleep with me because I have a rather large nest and I don't
want you sleeping on the couch." You swallow hard, feeling like you need to breathe properly
again. Here she is, proving that she is everything and more. "I slept there while I was finishing my
nest. It was a pretty slow torture." You smile a little at that, but that doesn't stop the chill from
spreading through your belly at just the thought of sharing a bed, a nest with Lilith Clawthorne. It's
not exactly panic now, it's anxiety.

She touches your chin with her fingertip, but this time it feels careful. Her touch feels a lot softer.

"But if you don't feel comfortable, then I'll sleep on the couch or with Eda and you sleep in my
nest." Your shoulders fall, and you feel as if your own walls are falling in the same way. Her eyes
are sincere, her smile is comforting, and her touch is simply sweet. She knows what you are feeling
and she wants to reassure you.

Why did she have to be like this? Why did she have to be this lovely woman on so many levels that
you couldn't help but feel any and all of your insecurities melt around her like warm butter?

She made you feel safe like no one ever did. She makes you want to just never leave her arms
again.
She surrounds you. Body, soul and being.

If that thread in your back breaks from being so taut. To hell with that. It's only her that will be in
your head.

"I'll sleep with you. No problem." She smiles wide now and it's so evident how happy she
is...Because you trust her.

Yeah. You two were extremely similar on many levels.

You lean in to kiss the corner of her cheek and your heart pounds in your ears. Because that's the
fragrance you'll smell all night long.

Maybe you never wanted to sleep alone again after that night.

(...)

It was easy to forget about the night's biggest event and the slight discomfort in your back because
there was so much to occupy your mind.

You played a slightly different version of "double ditto". You had no cards from that game, so Luz
suggested a new game, which is not surprising since she's probably the smartest person in the
house. The premise is simple. You write categories on the top of the pad each of you has in hand,
you all choose a letter of the alphabet, and you have two minutes to fill them all with words that
start with that letter. If someone puts in matching words, it's 5 points, unique words are 10 points,
and no words are 0 points.

Eda and Lilith got very competitive with this one in particular. You are almost afraid of the way
they are writing fast and almost tearing the notepad.

In the end, it was Amity who won, with a 10 point advantage over Lilith. The pupil surpasses the
master and they both seemed extremely proud of it. You saw the witch giving the girl a little wink
and she smiling afterward.

There was also the blind man's bluff. You weren't too tempted to participate, because you, Eda, and
Lilith had already had two whole bottles of wine, perfectly evident on the coffee table. But it was
the game you had the most practice at. Even in your drunken state, you let them wrap a blindfold
around your eyes and spin you around in the middle of the living room.

Thank goodness that the key to this game was your ears and not your focus.

You won that one, the easiest to find was Hooty who couldn't get out the door.

But after you went to hide near the stairs and the world turned a bit when you crouched down, you
decided to sit down and give up the games that involved you walking around the house. Eda
seemed to think the same, and you were almost asleep leaning against each other when they
finished the last round. It was Gus who won, and you catch yourself wondering if he didn't take off
his blindfold and build an illusion one because it was something you would definitely do if you
had any focus to do an illusion spell now.

After that, you are just watching the kids' imitation game. Luz is imitating what reminds you a lot
of a hot gas balloon, but it could be an elephant too.

Amity is particularly laughing a lot, her hand covering her mouth to avoid a louder sound. A laugh
that makes a small smile appear on Lilith's face.
"She never laughed like that, before everything." She whispers to you, overall the noise the
children are making.

Before everything...Before Luz.

Luz is the sunshine that basically made all the people in that room become friends. Maybe Willow
and Gus and Eda and King were a case apart, but the rest...Nobody would even look each other in
the face if it wasn't for Luz. She is an incredible girl. Everyone at the Owl House was an incredible
person actually. They weren't just misfits, they were people with unique talents and impressive
skills, exceptionally kind and you couldn't understand how that could be considered weird.

You're a little philosophical, aren't you? It's the alcohol stepping into your nerves, making you
extremely silly and The Neighbourhood is playing constantly inside your head. Oh. You are so
gay.

"I think it's a rat." Eda tries a guess and Luz makes a "what?" face. You wave your hand at the girl
to ignore what the woman said, by the way her voice sounded, she was already a little
philosophical too.

Your eyes stray to Lilith again. She's braiding Amity's hair, making it perfect for sleeping. You
look at her now, and it might be the alcohol, but her hair looks so glamorous, so dark and shiny.
It's like the night itself. Elizabeth Bishop had a poem about it, didn't she?

"The shooting stars in your black hair

in bright formation
are flocking where,
so straight, so soon?
- Come, let me wash it in this big tin basin,
battered and shiny like the moon."

Oh, that bitch was gay. Good for her.

"Thank you, Miss Lilith." Amity says as soon as she finishes the little braid by tying it with the
hairband the girl used to hold the top of her hair. She smiles in a way that makes you tilt your head.
She seems to have a rather motherly glow around her now.

"You should start stopping using the Miss." She warns. Amity's eyes soften at the corners as she
smiles more. So light.

Why do you get the feeling that this was not something she had much of? An adult who really
wanted to give a little bit of affection and care around her?

Maybe it's something about kicked kids. You meet in the middle of the road, you can see the signs
in each other.

"I promise I'll try." And she seems really sincere about it.

Lilith is simply relaxed as she leans her back against the couch, her hair brushing your thigh as she
lays her head on the cushion.

"May I braid your hair?" Willow guesses Luz's impersonation. That was Principal Bump.

Her eyes go to you, they look softer too, but still bright, silver and green staring at you. Good thing
you guys had stopped with the alcohol.
"I'm sorry?" She frowns, just slightly, just as if she really didn't understand the question.

"It's so long and beautiful." You trace your fingertips through her hair, it feels like silk between
your fingers. "May I braid it?" She frowns again, but this time it's confusion. Why? She seems to
want to ask but gives up when you just smile with a shrug. Lilith giggles next, probably at the
immaturity of your request.

"Sure." And you have to remind yourself that jumping around is still a too 2000s teenage movie
attitude for you to do.

You jump to the side of the couch and pat where you were previously sitting. Lilith has a small,
disbelieving smile on her lips as she sits down with her back to you, facing Eda. She doesn't miss
the opportunity to poke her sister with her foot, which makes Eda show her tongue.

Hooty realizes that he finally has a place to lie down and moves closer again to his place on Lilith's
lap. She strokes his head in acknowledgement.

You kneel so that you can pull her hair from the front, forming a strand in your hands. She had
quite a large amount of hair, it would be enough to play with. You start by braiding the top part, as
was common for the French braid. Your fingers glide gently through the dark strands of hair, like
the night sky itself. You believe that you can sprinkle her hair with stars and it will look just like
the human night sky.

You catch yourself imagining what it would be like to braid her hair if it were still red and
voluminous.

Once you finish the top part, you start taking the strands behind her ears, pulling them one by one
to join the middle set, crossing over the middle strand. You keep repeating this, it's almost
therapeutic. Her hair is reasonably long so it's simply relaxing to go strand by strand. Slow and
therapeutic, you can feel your mind becoming more and more relaxed.

It's not until you get more than halfway through the hair that you are surprised by a very noticeable
shudder on her part. Lilith's whole body trembles and your eyes widen.

You look at your own hands and realize that you have just taken the locks from the back of her
head. The last strands to be placed in the middle strand. Oh. You had already been suspecting this,
but now it's a clear confirmation.

"You have a sensitive nape. I'll keep that in mind." You say more to yourself than to her, a small
mischievous smile rising on your mouth. You can almost see her rolling her eyes as you pull the
last two strands to work with just the middle one. The way down is much quicker now and in less
than a minute you manage to finish the braid, tying it off with a rubber band you found on the
coffee table, probably holding the cards from some game.

"We also have very sensitive ears. Not that I should be hearing you. You're disgusting." Eda
complained then as you placed the braid to fall delicately down Lilith's back. You looked at her
curiously over the brunette's head.

"Sensitive ears?" Your eyebrows frown, pure interest coming out of your voice and the owl lady
smiles in an almost wicked way. Lilith narrows her eyes in her direction, in a silent threat quite
clear to your eyes.

"In the same way that we have keener hearing, we have a slightly more receptive cartilage, so to
speak." Oh. That was interesting. Sensitive cartilage where have you ever heard that?
"Oh." Your fingers almost itch to touch her ears. The moon earring shines, perfectly visible on the
right now that there was no hair covering it.

"Don't you dare." Lilith replied with a little growl that made you laugh. She had to stop trying to be
so grump if her face was red like that, it would never work.

"Please?" You pout as you look at her, resting your chin on her shoulder. She looks at you with the
same narrowed eyes, but you know the effect your puppy eyes have on most people. Especially on
her now.

She rolls her eyes hard before sighing.

"Fine. Just once." A rather silly grin appears on your mouth, pure excitement pumping through
your veins. You raise your hand and trace the tip of the pointed ear between your thumb and
forefinger delicately, it's really smoother than the human ear, thinner and even a little softer to the
touch.

Lilith sighs, audibly, and it's surprising how she simply sinks between your legs with a soft
shudder. Her back leaning against your chest as she closes her eyes and tilts her head toward your
fingers, the contractions gone from her face, entirely. Just the slightly irregular breathing.

Her body feels quite warm and it takes everything in you not to wrap your free arm around her.

Certainly sensitive ears. Completely sensitive.

"Thre you go. You're welcome, Y/N." Eda murmurs as she closes her eyes with a giggle still on her
lips.

You remove your fingers from her ear and Lilith immediately opens her eyes. Heat rises quickly up
to her face, coloring her cheeks red and then the tips of her ears.

She was quite adorable when she was embarrassed.

"Lulu, why did you stop the petting?" She blinks several times before returning to this world and
then sitting down again to continue petting Hooty's head. You think her fingers look a little shaky.

When the clock struck two in the morning. Eda decided that the adults should go to bed. It took
you a second to remember that this also applied to you because you were currently in an extremely
complex discussion with Luz about which was the best anime with girls as protagonists. She would
choose Sailor Moon and you obviously Violet Evergarden. She also preferred Levi to Hange,
which you thought was almost a crime.

Lilith caresses Amity's hair gently before she takes you by the hand and starts to pull you away
from the living room, or else you would be all night proving that Hange Zoë was simply Daenerys
from Attack on Titan.

Amity nods as you are heading toward the stairs and Lilith waves her free hand, a simple loving
smile on her lips. You remember to think she would make a great mother someday. If she ever
wanted to. Luz gives you a rather suggestive look that would have made you shake your head
negatively if you had the time.

It's only when you reach the second floor that reality falls on your slightly drunk brain again. You
would sleep with Lilith. The thread in your back tightens against your spine a little, but you push
everything you are feeling to the back of your mind because Lilith was Lilith.
She wouldn't do anything you didn't want her to do. She was your mate. She holds your wrist with
the greatest delicacy in the world.

"You have to get your toothbrush. About the pajamas, I can lend you one." You nod your head,
your reasoning probably not understanding that she had her back turned and couldn't see. Let alone
that you could just take one of your pajamas.

"I...I'll be right back." Her hand releases your wrist and you walk to the bathroom down the hall in
search of your toothbrush.

You find yourself standing for long minutes... Simply standing in her bedroom doorway.
Wondering whether you should go in or run out and slam your head against the nearest wall. The
latter option was looking rather tempting.

You sigh deeply, trying to stop being a child, and knock on the door.

"Come in." You take a couple of deep breaths before doing as she asks.

Lilith is looking out the window as you enter the room. Arms crossed over the same sweater she
had worn during the night, but the pants have changed to pajama pants, at least they weren't shorts.
That's what you tell yourself. At least they are not shorts.

There is a pair of pants and another sweater on her desk chair. They look exceptionally soft when
you pick them up and they smell like her, fresh and sweet.

Your eyes go to the large nest, it looked quite comfortable, far more comfortable than your bed, but
that doesn't stop your spine from quivering at the prospect of sleeping side by side with Lilith
Clawthorne.

You must have spent a few seconds staring at the nest because you don't notice when she
approaches, a slight smile on her lips, delicate and warm.

"Go get changed, I'll make it comfortable." She touches your face, kisses your cheek, gently and
softly. And you have to stop yourself from sighing, her mist around you seems quite firm now.
She doesn't need much.

You nod again, not trusting your voice to speak, and then force your legs until they work and lead
you to her bathroom.

The bathroom in her room is exceptionally clean. Everything is in its perfect place and you change
clothes quickly, getting rid of your jeans and shirt for the more comfortable clothes. You can smell
her perfume as soon as the clothes settle on your body, it seems to permeate you now and you're
not exactly complaining. The clothes are a little bigger too, considering she's taller, but you feel
welcome.

This time you try not to stand in the doorway to go back to the room. Try to be a little more adult so
to speak.

Lilith stands in front of the mirror as you get in. You frown slightly because she's running a cotton
pad over her shoulders, apparently a small bottle of potion between her fingers on the other hand.

"I can't sleep with concealer on, even though I wish I could, it does a lot of damage if it stays on
the skin for more than 24 hours." She says, without turning to you and you find your eyebrows
pronouncing even more. Did she wear make-up? Besides eyeliner and black lipstick? Why did she
apply makeup to her shoulders?
She still doesn't look at you when she returns the bottle to its place in the trunk. Does she
look...embarrassed? That's what you feel at least, shame that exudes from her pores enough to
reach you.

"Lilith?" And when you say her name out loud, she finally turns around. Your jaw drops almost in
the same second.

She...She has freckles. Freckles that spread down her nose, up her cheeks, some across her
forehead, and even above her lips. Some also spread to her shoulders and speckle the skin of her
neck, you imagine they must extend up her arms, down her back, even up to her thighs. Which
makes you imagine that even on the game day she applied that thing.

You remember thinking...They looked like grains of sand.

"Oh Gosh, you're beautiful." She opens her mouth, slightly pink now that there was no black
lipstick, but then she closes it again, her ears completely red. "Why do you cover them?" You take
a step closer and can't stop yourself from starting to count them, one, two, three, four. Oh, there
were so many.

She is quiet for a moment as she shrugs as if it's no big deal. You think about the Coven again, did
those shits really have the courage to look at that face and say she was too malleable? Too weak?

"When I was a kid a girl I liked and who I even dated for a while..." She begins as she crosses her
arms under her chest in a protective gesture you already know well. "She...She said it made me
look imbecile, some of her friends agreed and suddenly I was the 'scabies'." Your shoulders drop. It
was easy to forget that Lilith Clawthorne, the sharp witch was once a nerd who suffered bullying.
"But I didn't have the courage to remove them with a spell for perfect skin like some girls did. So I
started using a concealer and the mockery stopped." You don't care who the girl is, you know you
already hate her with all your heart. Who would have the courage to look at her like that and not
say that she was simply beautiful? Simply perfect?

Who would have the courage to look at that cute little girl in that picture and say that she was
anything but adorable?

You don't understand why your eyes are tearing up, you have to swallow as your instincts beg you
to come closer. So you do.

There is only doubt in her eyes when you take her cheeks in both hands. She looks afraid of what
you would say.

But you don't say immediately. You lean in so that you can kiss one cheek and then the other. Her
eyes close with the contact of your mouth, her eyelashes fluttering slightly.

"You had a terrible taste in girls." You whisper next, which makes her genuinely laugh softly. "I
think they're beautiful. You should let everyone see them." She looks with mild disbelief at you. "I
mean that. They enhance your eyes and make your face look a lot less threatening." Your fingertips
run through the little dots. Oh, you would spend a lifetime memorizing the place each one
occupied on her face.

"Don't you think everyone will think it's weird?" You frown slightly at that.

"Think it's weird that you finally feel comfortable showing them who you really are?" She shrugs
again, staring at the floor. "I think they will love it, Lilith, especially Eda. She'll love having her
big sister back." A small smile begins to form on her mouth. It's a little odd to see her pink lips
when you were so used to the black lipstick, but you love it. "I loved them if that's any
encouragement." Lilith's smile widens and it's sheer surprise that takes your face when she simply
wraps her arms around you, squeezing gently around your waist. She rests her face on your
shoulder, completely leaning against you and you just frown slightly as you hold her by the
shoulders.

"Thank you." She whispers then, her voice touching your cheek and making your whole body
tremble.

You want to ask why. But you think you understand.

You've seen all of her. The parts she liked, the parts she didn't. And you accepted every one of
them. You were willing for each of them. You want to tell her that she really doesn't need to thank
you for that.

Because that's what friends should do. That was just you being her friend. As a mate... As a mate,
you intended to give her the world.

When did you think of that? Having someone who with one touch tears you apart, who with one
word shatters you, who with a single different breath makes you reconsider what you're going to
say.

It's just her.

You sigh and stick your nose in her hair.

No one will ever take you out of that embrace. No one will ever touch her again.

And when you promise yourself that, it feels like the thread finally loosens behind your back.

You can breathe again, and you're sure of what you want.

Her.

You just want her.

 Chapter 16
Chapter Summary

The one with...You know.

Lying on a nest is surprisingly very comfortable. You feel like you are inside a warm cocoon, it's
soft and quite gentle against your shoulders, better than your mattress and even better than the bed
you had at...Home.

"Well?" She raises an eyebrow as she lies beside you. You look at the shiny mobile on the bed and
immediately smile. Lilith claps a hand and the lights in the room go out, only the mobile glows
now, the crystals mirror the moonlight outside and it looks...Wonderful.

You have no idea if you've ever seen anything this bright.

"Does it help you sleep?" You point to the mobile and she nods her head particularly slowly,
almost as if she is analyzing your reactions.

"I like shiny things." So do ravens. You think, but you don't say. You just move a little closer so
you can see her eyes perfectly. Five, six, seven. You couldn't stop the urge to count her freckles. It
would be your new hobby.

"You're staring at me again." She doesn't say it in the same way as earlier, she looks slightly
amused now as a few locks of hair escape from her braid to spread across her cheeks.

"What can I say? You're beautiful." She blushes so easily at compliments that you are sure you will
spend your life saying how beautiful she is just to see that slight hue of red take over her ears.

She tilts her head gently toward you just enough, just enough so that if you tilt yours, your mouth
will be on hers. You look into her eyes and it's so odd and comfortable to be able to talk without
needing a single word. You don't have to say anything at all, and yet she knows what you want.

She brushes her lips against yours, slow and warm. Her mouth feels softer without lipstick and
smells strongly of toothpaste. Your fingers immediately reach for her shoulders, pulling her a little
closer to you. Her warmth is entirely surrounding now, and you are quite sure that you just want to
wrap yourself around her until your death comes.

But she's not moving forward. Not really. Her mouth seems to slide over yours as gently as the first
time. It doesn't take. It gives. Your heart is already racing a little in anticipation. You need it.

You need her.

You pull your lips away from hers just enough to be able to speak.

"Kiss me properly." You murmur and Lilith giggles, a laugh that makes your spine quiver softly
before she wraps her hands around your hips and pulls you into her arms, firmly.

She kisses you now. One of those kisses. One of those kisses that will steal your breath and your
sanity on the way. She thrusts herself almost completely over you as her tongue slides into your
mouth. Oh. She turns your legs into jelly in such an easy way.

Your whole body responds to her, moves closer, asks for more. The thread responds in the same
way, it seems to be completely aware of what is happening around it.

It's you who pulls her leg between yours this time. Lilith sighs against your face, warm and flawed.
You don't want to stop kissing her, not for a single second. You need to feel her skin, every bit of
it, your fingers slide up her neck and finally reach the back of her head.

She murmurs into your mouth just for a moment before pressing her thigh firmly against you.
You're pretty sure you're already dripping. That's all she needs, a kiss, a touch, and you already
need her so bad that it scratches under your skin.

You clutch her sweater between your fingers. What wouldn't you give for a spell to simply make
her clothes disappear?

Her lips move down your neck, moist and warm, making you push your hips against her leg with a
faltering sigh. Her hands run over the bare skin of your hips, gently moving up and down under the
sweater. Her nails scrape your belly and you find it incredibly hard to think or even breathe.

You tug harder at the sweater with real intent to remove it and that's when Lilith's mouth pulls
away from your skin with a naughty giggle.

"Are we in a hurry?" She inquires with a slightly raised eyebrow. Your face feels warm under her
gaze, everything about you feels quite warm.

"Lilith, please." This need's pumping so hard in your veins now that you think you might actually
cry for her to just make you come. You don't even think about the bond.

"I know." She says as she leans in to place a fragile kiss against your neck, making your body
twitch with how good her lips feel. "But we drank a lot of wine." You sigh so impatiently it makes
her laugh again, the vibrations hitting your skin making it even harder to think.

"Just a few glasses. I am perfectly fine. I want this. I want you." Her eyes sparkle in your direction
when you say that. It's clear when her pupils double in size. She leans in to place a short, chaste
kiss on your swollen mouth then.

"I want you too..." Your heart beats extremely fast now, to the point that you feel it all over your
head. "So much ." She murmurs against your cheek, her breathing a little heavier. You sigh at her
voice, at her mouth, at her skin so pressed against yours. "But I want you to be sure." You let out
another sigh, completely frustrated, in her face. Your insides were pulsing so hard that you think
you were totally likely to explode. "Such a greedy little thing, aren't you?" Her eyes are gleaming
in amusement and you feel a little indignation pumping through you. She's having so much fun
while you could barely think straight. Well, you're never going to do anything straight. But that's
not the point. She's not making it easy for you. You have to close your legs just at the spasm that
single sentence and that smile cause in you.

"I hate you." You whisper, completely flustered, and Lilith chuckles before kissing the tip of your
nose.

"We've already waited so long, what's a few more hours?" A few excruciating hours you think to
yourself before sighing once more. "Come here and be my little spoon and stop being grumpy."
You wanted to give her the cold shoulder, but you are weakened by that wide smile, the corners of
her eyes crinkling.
So you wrap yourself in her arms, placing your back to her chest. Your body is still throbbing and
the warmth of her body doesn't help a lot, it's heated and the fit is perfect against your back. But
her arms wrap around you like a pair of wings and she smells so good and everything around you is
so comfortable that you think it's not impossible for you to sleep.

It's only long minutes later when your breathing was calming down and your body was getting used
to her touch that she speaks again.

"Will you sing for me?" It's simple. It's such a simple request. It's something so...Intimate. She's
just asking you to sing for her as her fingers gently move up and down your arm. You don't think
anyone has ever made you a request as soft and lovely as that.

"What do you want?" You don't think that you will ever be able to deny any of her requests. You
will always give her everything. Lilith yawns behind your head, slow and sleepy.

"Calm and cozy." She replies, her voice sounding perfectly next to your ear. All the hair on the
back of your neck stands on end with that, and she giggles against your skin at the reaction.
Impossible woman.

You think again how you barely sang at home, only to yourself. And here you are, about to sing,
wrapped in the arms of a raven woman, in the boiling isles, inside a nest.

You think it makes sense. For some reason, you think it makes sense.

You imagine the lyrics in your head, the delicate chords before you actually bring the words.

"May these words be the first..." It was one of your favorites, it was pure and the lyrics were sweet.
And Lilith leans into the sound as if she appreciates it as well. "To find your ears..." You can feel
her nuzzling her cheek against the curve of your neck.

"Don't stop. Please." Her voice drips honey, sleepy and sweet. You curl your fingers around her
hands, taking a deep breath before searching for the next words.

Singing to Lilith is as good as simply breathing the first-morning air, as feeling the ocean waves
breaking on your feet, as taking a warm bath after an extremely long day. Because when you sing
you can feel her emotions become a spectrum of light pink, white, and lilac. Pastel shades that
indicate to you how she is simply...Pleased.

"The world is brighter than the sun... Now that you're here." Her arms tighten loosely around you,
but you know she's listening. "Though your eyes will need some time to adjust to the overwhelming
light surrounding us." The light surrounding you. Adjust. It sounds good. You sing each word,
feeling the letters fill the air around you, transforming the atmosphere, making your head light as
Lilith's breathing became more and more rhythmic against your neck.

You feel the spectrum slowly losing its color, the sensations of peace and belonging slowly
diminishing because... Because she is slowly falling asleep. And this is beautiful.

"With every heartbeat, I have left I'll defend your every breath...I'll do better..." And when the last
verses leave your lips, they sound more like a whisper than anything else. Your eyes are almost
closed.

You're pretty sure she's asleep. You just know. You don't even have to turn your face.

So you smile. Feeling that every word of that song was as true as it could be. It sounded like a
promise.
And only then you close your eyes and sink into her.

Allowing her aura to cover you.

(...)

You smell her before you even open your eyes. Fresh, lemon, and tulips. Sometimes you thought it
was all a dream, but it wasn't. You inhale with your eyes still closed and her fragrance almost
makes you dizzy for a moment, probably because everything in this nest smells a little like her. It's
one of the best smells.

Your eyes open and you blink a few times, getting used to the dim light coming from the window.
It was early morning, and the weather seemed a little cloudy, but still, there is enough light for you
to look at her.

And she is beautiful.

The black hair caught in a braid thrown behind her back could wrap itself around you so easily.
The pale skin, with lovely freckles around her nose and up her cheeks. It's almost impossible to
resist the urge to count them again. How she could have the courage to cover them up with make-
up? They are perfect. Her long lashes that fluttered slowly while she was still dreaming. The
pointed and well-designed nose and ears, the moon earring on the right. Her lips showing a natural
pink color.

Pale as a swan. So beautiful. She looks like a painting. Oh Titan, you already want to kiss her
again, so bad. A little smirk shapes on your lips at this thought, and you instinctively move a little
closer to her.

Your eyes close again as you rest your forehead on the curve of her collarbone. A few more hours
of sleep. That's all you want, a few more hours of sleep with Lilith in the nest. Just that.

You must have miscalculated your movements, though. Because you feel her sigh a little and then
her arms are wrapping around you, her hands outlining your hips as if they were born for this. Her
touch. Her touch is everything.

You lift your chin so that you can look at her. Her eyes are a little watery from sleep, but she is
grinning, a wide smile that made your heartbeat so hard it felt like it was going to burst out of your
chest.

"Good morning." Her voice, husky with sleep, makes a shiver run down the entire length of your
spine.

"Good morning." It's pure instinct when you raise your hands to trace her face. Just feel her. You
were deprived of that contact for too long and now that you had it, you wouldn't stop. Her skin is
warm and she closes her eyes as your fingers gently glide across her cheeks. She feels so
comfortable under your touch, so at home. You like how this feels.

She seems to be as hungry for touch as you are because her next action is to pull you even closer to
her until there is no space between your bodies. You can feel her breathing now, rhythmic and
heated, as well as the way her chest moves up and down.

"I dreamed of you." She says as she blinks her eyes repeatedly. Green and gray. They stare at you,
slightly amused, slightly playful. You can read her so well now.
"May I ask for details?" Lilith moistens her lower lip with the tip of her tongue as she looks at you.
She is grinning wider as she leans in a little to reach for your ear as if there is someone else who
can hear what she is about to say.

"I can show you. What do you think?" Your spine twitches. It's pathetic the way you get such a
chill just at how her voice sounds, just at how close her breath feels to your ear. You move your
chin to nod, and you feel her smile as she leans in to rest her mouth against the skin of your neck.

Her lips are warm, and yet you feel your hair stand up on end as if it were cold. Her hands grip you
as she carefully kisses the delicate skin, moving her mouth up and down your neck, below your
ear, down your jaw. Your fingers slide up her neck, reach the nape, and you feel her sigh against
your cheek as you brush your fingers there. Your mouth seems to beg for that kiss.

Her lips follow the curve of your chin. She moves past your mouth to kiss the tip of your nose
playfully and then your forehead. Her eyes meet yours again and you are sure that you have never
wanted someone more than you want her.

She seems to read it in you. Because when you thrust in she receives you. Your eyes close again
when your lips finally meet hers. She still tastes minty, fresh, and warm. Your insides throb with
just that little contact. Her kiss. Her kiss was enough to make you question the meaning of life.
Delicate, soft, and moist lips, her hands holding you like you were something extremely precious.
You wanted her and only her.

You trace the line of her chin with your thumb, feeling the lack of resistance in her face. Your
tongue slides into her mouth and her fingers sink into you. Heat seems to exude from your face in
waves and maybe from her face too due to the fact everything seems so heated all of a sudden. Her
taste explodes inside you, her breath becoming a little flawed against your face.

You trace her hair with your fingertips, reaching for the end of the braid so you can pull the
hairband, and then you can thread your fingers between them. Lilith murmurs. Just a small sound
that sends vibrations through your tongue and your entire being.

Maybe you just want her to consume you. Something that feels like begging. You have never felt
this before, it's more than sexual desire, you simply need to feel more of her.

A shaky sigh leaves your nose as she slides her thigh between your legs. It's more of her. You can
feel her body heat more easily now and it's so simple for you to push yourself down, just a little bit
so that the fit is perfect. Her breath changes against your face, as does her tightness.

She pulls her mouth away from yours and you would have whimpered in protest if her eyes hadn't
stared at you with such doubt. It's so evident in the way she looks at you right now.

"Are you sure about this?" It's a simple question. But you feel the weight of it as soon as it leaves
her lips, hitting your face in warm, soft waves. You knew what it meant, you've read a lot about it.
"If...If we do this the bond will be consummated. What we have will become vastly intenser." She
grabs your right hand, bringing it to rest on her chest. Her heart, you can feel it in your fingertips.
It's beautiful, it's the most calming sound you have ever felt. "I don't know how it will be for us, it
may be weaker than I imagine or it may not. Either way, it's a perpetual bond, Y/N." It's something
that weighs on her shoulders, you realize. She's still thinking that you deserve more. Gosh, why did
you have to fall in love with the most stubborn witch in the boiling isles? "Do you want to bond
with me, probably forever?" You almost chuckle at how that sounded like a marriage proposal.

Does she really still have the courage to ask?

"Lilith." It's the way her eyes soften when you say her name like that, how they seem insecure.
Silver looking like gray. You are so sure you would choose her. Above all things. Overall other
options. You have fallen in love with this woman and every layer of her. "I don't think I've ever
been so sure of anything in my entire life." Her smile slowly takes over her mouth, delicate and
warm, reaches her eyes and you could swear they sparkle.

It's her turn to propel herself towards you, with a lot more purpose shining in those eyes. You can
almost feel the seconds before she brushes her mouth against yours. It's almost like getting a shock
this time, your whole body shakes, and you could swear she lets out a giggle at this reaction. Her
fingertips slip under your sweater, caressing your belly's skin, her long fingernails making a
specific space in your spine extremely sensitive.

"Wait." You sigh impatiently this time as she pulls away. Lilith lets out a loud laugh at that. She
rises from the nest and the lack of her warmth really startles you this time. Something under your
skin almost jumps to reach for her hand. You watch her go first to the trunk and take out a small
bottle of elixir. She takes in all the golden liquid with a grimace. This is understandable, high levels
of pressure could turn her into a raven beast, and as much as you thought her power was pretty
cool...You don't think you're ready to a giant raven flirting with you again. She then goes to the
desk and draws on the glyph pad for just a second before slapping one hand on the other with the
piece of paper between them. A small blue mist appears between her fingers, the magic is delicate
and beautiful, and when it finally fades you notice that her nails are perfectly short.

"I like them pointy." You pout when she approaches again. Eyes playing with yours, amusedly.

"I can return them later." She climbs into the nest again, propelling herself between your legs as if
this were her place. And you had to agree that it was. Your legs hook into her hips perfectly, as if
they were made for it, and your heart seems to beat so fast in anticipation that you're sure she can
feel it. "But I'm not going to risk hurting you." She traces your lower lip with her thumb gently and
takes everything in you not to suck it into your mouth. She has an elegant hand, with long, slender
fingers. You have always thought her hands were so beautiful and just the thought that she is
caressing your mouth with one finger...It's almost too much. Her eyes are sparkling and seem to
sparkle brighter now that she is underneath all the objects in the mobile, silver and shiny.

"It's okay. Open your mouth for me." You frown and your cheeks immediately turn red. It was
incredibly easy to forget that she could hear you in other ways. Your ears burn, but you would not
miss that chance. You part your lips and she is grinning as she slides her thumb into your mouth.
Your cheeks boil as you slide your tongue across the soft skin before sucking. Lilith sighs loud
enough for you to know that she thought this was hot. "Good girl." If the way your face heated up
didn't say enough, you think the way you grabbed the hem of her sweater was quite evident. You
were a mess with compliments.

Her finger goes away, only for her lips to replace it. This time without any interruption. You feel
that you might as well be trembling.

Her tongue enters your mouth almost at the same second that her hands meet your hips. You don't
know what to focus on first. On her mouth that feels even hotter than last time, on her fingers
pulling up the hem of your sweater, on her hair falling delicately across your face. They smell so
good. She hesitates, only to look up at you when your sweater reaches your chest height. She was
so careful around you it was comical. The perfect combination of sexy girlfriend and overprotective
girlfriend.

Your arms reach up and she pulls it easily over your head. You pull her sweater off without even
hesitating, which makes her laugh before discarding it as well. Lilith is impressive in a lot of ways.
Her skin is beautiful, freckles spread across her shoulders, across her belly, it's just gorgeous. Her
breasts are perfect, and there is a jewel, a green rhombus attached to her chest, a little above the
middle of her breasts. You think it was a little peculiar, but you were dating a witch so you just
pulled her back to you by the sides of her face.

When you kiss again it's like feeling the world shake. Something from underneath your skin stirs
surprisingly as you feel her bare skin on yours, the thread stretching down your spine, trembling,
it's not unpleasant, it's just so unusual. You've never felt it before. It's what makes you cling to her
back almost instinctively, almost afraid she'll stop.

Her lips slide across your skin. Your mouth is probably already swollen and she leaves one last
delicate kiss on it before sliding down your jaw. Just below your ear. Your neck. Your breath
hitches for a second and her eyes meet yours, silver and green.

"Are you okay?" Her eyebrows frown delicately, genuinely concerned about how you feel about
her every move. No one has ever treated you like this, no one has ever cared enough to wonder if
you were okay.

But Lilith does care.

"Is this okay?" She asks as her fingers reach across your bare belly, brushing her thumbs on your
skin. The shudder is impossible to control.

"Lilith..." And you hope that just her name is enough reply. You just want her to consume you, in
every possible way. She smiles. Suggestive and quite warm.

"Okay." She murmurs leaning toward you again, to meet your chest. Her mouth is moist and warm
as she wraps one of your nipples with it. She's not trying to be rushed here. She is taking her time to
run her tongue over your skin, to make it stiff and sensitive to touch. Your insides pulse, the thread
trembles. Your fingers dig into her hair and she seems extremely proud of this as she moves to the
other breast.

She sucks it as if she were hungry and your hips immediately respond to this, jumping toward her.
Her fingers brush your ribs, almost as if to calm your spirits. As if to say, we're just getting started.
Or maybe she did, and you heard it. She continues the path with her mouth, between your breasts,
down your sensitive rib bones, into your belly. You feel your whole body shiver at the difference
in temperature between the wetness of her mouth and the warmth of your skin.

She looks at you again as her thumbs hook into your pants. She's waiting for an answer, a
confirmation, and you just nod, not trusting your own voice to say anything.

She pulls your pants out of the way and the thread trembles a little more when she places herself
between your legs again. The hair spreads down her back and then you realize...She has a tattoo on
her back, there are wings and it looks like a triangle. That's sexy. Uh.

Why did she have to be so sexy?

She looks so good with her swollen lips and dilated pupils. You don't even remember feeling any
shame or discomfort. Because it's her. She's your mate. She wants you. That's all that matters.

"Show me how you like it." That is the last thing she says before she simply sinks between your
legs.

The first stroke of her tongue at you is like a punch. South and north. You feel as if all the air has
been stolen from your lungs. The thread stretches and your fingers sink into her head. All the heat
seems to be rushing through your whole body, up and down from your cheeks to the middle of your
legs. You think that's not normal, but you couldn't care less as Lilith opened her mouth and sucked
you. Your legs begin to tremble around her, and you're sure she's smiling because of it.

A firmer stroke, the perfect pressure change on your clit makes your body jump toward her.

Her eyes lift up to you. Dark and shiny, like a predator's. She wraps her fingers around your hips
and sinks you hard enough into the blankets to be a warning.

Quiet.

You stroke your fingers through her hair, so soft, guiding her to the sweet spot, and when she sucks
exactly there you almost fall apart. Oh, she knew how to work that mouth well.

Your inner muscles tightened so much that you thought you could have come just with that.
Everything was pulsating. Everything was trembling. But you want more, you want more of her.
You want to feel her.

So much. It's the desire that screams under your skin, it's this desire that seems to make you blind
and deaf.

You need her. You need to feel her almost as much as you need to breathe.

"Li-Lilith." She murmurs against you, without shifting her focus, and your body trembles again, as
expected. "Lilith, please." When you pull her gently by the hair she seems to understand. She
stands up, kneeling between your legs and you again do not hesitate to rip off the last two pieces of
clothing that are preventing you from feeling her fully. It should be a crime to be beautiful like this.
The flat, perfectly drawn belly, the smooth, delineated curve of her hips, her thighs, her long legs,
freckles spreading all over her soft skin. You would lose yourself in this woman so easily.

She is smiling as she leans over you again, kissing just behind your ear to whisper.

"You're prettier." You feel her nails trailing down your thighs, the hairs seem magnetized now.
"And tastes so good." The thread seems tense enough to break now. You need to kiss her, your
gasping breath tells you so, your trembling fingers confirm it. You pull her by the sides of her face
and she approaches as easily as she can, her fingers curling around your face.

Your taste really is still in her mouth. Something quivers inside you at this. This woman was
between your legs, this woman was eating you a few seconds ago, and now she was kissing your
mouth with everything she had. Her tongue brushing yours like she was born to do it.

She is still on her knees so it's so easy to bend your knee so that your thigh slides across her. Lilith
chokes and the thread seems to extend a little further. She is wet and it's so hot.

When would you have the chance to sink between her legs?

You just feel it, one of her hands moving down your body, until she reaches between your legs
again. When she slides her fingers inside you, you have to move your mouth away from hers to
breathe, your hands sinking into her hips. The feeling is dominant, the filling makes your legs
weak.

Oh she looks beautiful like this. Red cheeks, chest, and ears. Hair sticking to her forehead with
sweat. Breathlessness. Suggestive smile on her face. She looks like she's about to make a mess of
you, and you're not exactly complaining.
She moves over you and it's very hard to control a pathetic sound from coming out of your mouth
as her skin slides over yours and her fingers sink into you. You feel that you won't last long like
this, not with her body so close, not with her breath so shallow against your face. She is addictive,
she is everything. And you feel her as on the edge as you are.

It's like falling into a vat of steam. Just consume me.

You can almost see, as well as feel, now. Golden threads that seem to wrap around you, that seem
to wrap around her. It's like the beginning of a storm, the electricity in the air is very similar, that
tension about to break is very similar.

In the first thrust, your eyes don't stray from hers, they are glowing now, you are sure they look
much more golden than green and gray. In the second, her mouth falls over yours again, her hair
spreading over your face. The third one is tougher, you sink your fingers into her hips to return that
because you think it won't last long. And you have to come together. You want this and you know
that she wants it too.

She kisses you. Again and again. Her fingers move, she grinds against your thigh. Again and again.
The golden threads seem tighter and tighter, shining brighter than the hanging mobile, the energy
seems to fill the whole room, expanding, showing itself.

It's going to explode, it's going to break everything around you.

It's hard to breathe. It's hard to hold on much longer.

"Lilith." Her name. That's all she needs. She doesn't need you to tell her you're almost there, she
knows. The witch's forehead brushes against yours, her skin seems to be as boiling as your own.

"It's okay, my dear." Your inner muscles tremble with the pet name. "You don't need to hold on."
She leans over you and her fingers find that sweet spot inside you that makes your whole body
twitch. Threads are swaying around you, they know the moment is so close. "You are so good for
me." She whispers against your skin and...That's all you need. You slide your hand to reach
between her legs and when your thumb finds the apex of her legs, Lilith murmurs against your
throat, her fingers tapping hard enough to move you over the blankets.

When you two come. It's like watching a fireworks display. Everything seems to expand for a
moment, even though nothing moves. Your body collapses, so you cling to her, sinking your
fingers into her back. She does the same, her arms wrapping around your head like a cocoon, a very
protective gesture that makes your heart swell. The golden threads are perfectly visible around you
now, floating between your bodies, blending with her extremely white skin and your more tanned
one. They are forming a beautiful spiral of golden mist, like Christmas lights around a tree. You
think you can touch it. You reach out for one of the little braided strings, and when your fingers
touch it, it gently crumbles over your hand, like touching golden dream dust. Like in that movie
with the guardians, Sandman.

It's so beautiful.

Your breath seems long lost. But so does hers. You are just panting against each other's face,
nothing feels more right than feeling the warmth of her breath.

You can feel her heart beating against your own body and it's like hearing a hummingbird.
Wingbeats too fast. Lilith Clawthorne.

You don't want to see. You don't want to hear. You just want to feel her. Just her.
Your eyes close. Nothing in your head but how she is here. Just her. Something tells you that this
was literally a point of no return, she's part of you now. You are part of her now. You feel that you
need her at that moment almost as much as you need to breathe. I can't seem to not need to need
you.

"How do you feel?" She whispered, her voice in a much lower tone than usual. Her eyes are still
closed and you just take a few breaths to try to get the maximum amount of oxygen to your brain
before answering.

"As if a truck ran me over?" Lilith chuckles. A low, humorous giggle that makes you smile.

"Try to think of something." Gosh, you were hungry, so the first thing that comes to your mind is
that chocolate cake in the kitchen fridge. The sweet, soft, smooth taste.

"Why did you think of cake?" She finally opens her eyes to look at you, a giggle in her mouth still.
She watches the golden threads slowly fade afterward, she looks delighted and you can't help but
find it adorable how her eyes sparkle with that adorable curiosity.

"I'm hungry." You replied simply, your smile getting bigger from seeing that smile you liked so
much on her mouth. How beautiful she looked now, eyes soft and bright, smiling, ears still slightly
reddened. You raise one hand to trace the tip of the right, Lilith closes her eyes and leans into the
touch, almost purring. You completely loved those sensitive ears.

"This...It's incredible." She raises a hand to run through the golden strands, the golden dust easily
falling onto her skin. "I didn't think it would be like this, so..." You hear the word before she even
says it.

"Enchanted." She looks at you when you say the word, and her eyes seem to reflect the gold. So
beautiful.

"You'll have to stop mentally complimenting me." She snuck up to place a delicate kiss on the tip
of your nose, before resting her head on your shoulder, her eyes watching the strands slowly
becoming thinner and smaller. "It always makes me want to kiss you." You just shake your head
negatively, tracing her hair with your fingertips, running them inside of her pointed ear delicately.
She actually purrs this time, a low, cooing sound, tilting her head toward you.

"That gem...Did it hurt to be put in?" You feel her frown, even though you can't see it.

"Not at all. It's quite common among witches." You want to frown now as well. "It's quite useful
for knowing the level of your magic, as well as, in my and Eda's case for knowing when the curse
is very close to taking over your body, the gem darkens and turns black. I put mine on many years
ago for control, it turned out to be quite useful." It's instinctive for your hand to trace the small
crystal with your fingertips.

"It's pretty." Her eyes meet you again, now from the bottom up. It's impossible not to smile. Part of
her. Part of you. You feel the little thread now, it's like a little chain stretched down your spine. it's
not trying to steady itself now, it's perfectly in place. It doesn't bother you. Mostly because you feel
where it ends. "And that's a tattoo?" You ask with a little giggle as you run your fingers along the
scarred skin of her back, it really looks more like a scar than a real tattoo.

Lilith just contorts her lips as she denies it with her head.

"It's my coven brand. When we join a coven we get one of those, usually on our wrist, but I thought
it would look better on my back." You raise your eyebrows and Lilith laughs. "I was a bit of a
hardcore teenager okay?" And you weren't judging, it was a beautiful golden tattoo, if it wasn't a
reminder of her time in the Coven you would really love it with all your heart.

Lilith stares into your eyes for a moment and then smiles wider.

You frown, and she suddenly pulls away from your arms. She leaves the nest. Completely naked to
go to the trunk in the corner of the room. You feel your ears burning because you can't take your
eyes off her.

You watch her take something rather large out of the trunk and then turn to you with a huge smile.
She walks quickly over to enter the nest again with...A guitar case next to her chest?

Your eyebrows frown almost at the same second. What?

"I read in some books in ancient languages that it was common for mates to give gifts as a
celebration for the bond consummation." Now you raise your eyebrows in surprise, opening your
mouth to try to add something, but she continues anyway. "The bard coven is one of the nine main
covens, they use instruments and music to cast spells." She says as she extends the case between
you and opens it, revealing a brown les paul. That would have already made you widen your eyes,
but there are runes on it. Runes are intricate and perfectly placed all over the length of the wood.
"You would need to have magic to do this naturally, but I researched and discovered some spells
for enchanting musical instruments." She points to the runes. "It's enchanting, well I hope it works,
but anyway it's a way to make the instrument work like the glyphs, pretty handy for those who can
play." She looks at you expectantly now as she removes the instrument from its cover and places it
in your arms. You don't think anyone has ever given you such a specific and thoughtful gift. "I
haven't found any spells to summon the instrument as we do with staffs, but you can carry it with
the case, still cool right?" You open and close your mouth a few times, not knowing exactly what
to say.

Why does she have to be like that? Why does she have to look at you with the world's most childish
expressions while grinning from ear to ear?

How could this woman and the cold-expressing witch you tried so hard to understand be the same
person?

"I don't have a gift for you. You should have told me." She frowns with real doubt. As if you had
just said the stupidest thing in the world.

"You've already given me my gift." You frown. Not understanding what on earth you had given
her. She points to her right ear and the moon earring seems to glow.

"I didn't give it to you as a celebration for the bond and it's just an earring." She smirks with the
corner of her mouth as she shakes her head negatively. Again as if you have said the world's
biggest nonsense.

"It's not just an earring." But she doesn't explain what she means by that. "Try it, I want to see if it
worked, and I have no idea how to play string instruments." You smile imagining Lilith on the
piano before reaching your fingers into the neck. It's been a while since you've played electric
guitar. You imagine that this particular one doesn't need amplifiers. When the first chord leaves
your fingers, a bluish haze comes off the instrument, chilling your skin as the whole room fills with
light, bright, and extremely beautiful.

Impressive. That is impressive. Your heart races at how thoughtful this gift was. Her eyes glow in
different colors as she follows the magic around the room, like a concert smoke machine.
You put the guitar aside so you can propel yourself towards her, taking her face between your
hands and placing a kiss on her lips.

"It's perfect. Thank you." Her ears move adorably in a reaction to the unanticipated affection. Her
cheeks heat up next, probably from that impulse she couldn't control.

"You're welcome." She whispers. "We should probably go downstairs to make breakfast. Eda and
the others are doubtless still in bed after yesterday." You close your eyes and sigh deeply, feeling
laziness creep into your bones.

"What if we stayed here all day?" Lilith lets out a graceful giggle before denying with her head.

"As much as I find the idea promising, I believe it would not be very polite of us." You roll your
eyes enough to make the other woman pinch your nose as you sit down on the nest.

However, before she can pick up her sweater tossed on the edge, you pull her back by the hand.
She taps against your body and has an eyebrow raised slightly in your direction with that gesture.

"One kiss." That's what you say. Even if it's not what you are thinking.

"Then why am I hearing 'please buy it' so loudly?" Damn mating bond, you think with a sigh.
Lilith laughs before leaning down, taking your cheeks in her hands, to place an extremely chaste
kiss on your mouth. "You're cute when you're needy." You sigh deeply against her face. How
could you already want her again? How did her taste seem to awaken things in you that you surely
never felt before? It's only a kiss and you already wrap your hands around her. You want her as
close as possible. "Y/N..." She scolds in a veiled tone. Your mouth finds the junction of her neck,
placing numerous soft kisses that make her let out a sigh against your face.

You feel when she loosens up in your arms, just as her aura becomes much more malleable. This
bond thing could have its advantages.

"20 minutes." You ask for, your mouth running along the underside of her chin, almost reaching
her mouth again. Your fingers reach down her back, curling the hair at the ends.

"10." She retorts as she leans back toward you, her eyes shining with an amusement you loved.

"Make it 15 and we're even." She doesn't answer, but when she touches her lips to yours again you
hear her inside your own mind, no words needed and yet the voice is the same and in the same
suggestive tone.

"You're lucky you're cute."

 Chapter 17
Chapter Summary

The one where we met an old friend.

You took longer than 15 minutes.

But eventually, you agreed that you should go downstairs and make breakfast. There were five
children in the house and Eda needed help. You showered in her bathroom, looking at the products
she used, there was one that smelled perfectly like the tulips you smelled on her and it was
impossible to resist the urge to use it. Feeling her smell on you, surely one of the best things you
have ever felt.

However, and especially alone you can feel the bond better. You feel it stretch to the end of your
spine and then feel where it ends, on her. She's moving around the room, doing something, and just
relief takes over your mind through the connection. She's calm. She's in peace. You want her to be
like this forever. You close your eyes to let the water run down your face, knowing that it will take
some time to get used to feeling someone on such a deep level. But you decide to try an
experiment.

"Hey mate!" You think in a high pitch if that makes any sense. You feel the slight vibration
through the bond and the distinct sound of something falling to the floor in the other room. You
laugh softly.

"Your cuteness has its limits." She returns and you hear her voice perfectly inside your head. It
sounds a little scolding, but still funny...And beautiful. It's a little awkward. But...Soothing.

"Does it?" You hear her laugh through the bond.

"Hurry up, goofy." You giggle as well and wash your eyes, feeling when she has drifted off to the
back of the room.

You rub your wet hair with a towel as Lilith stops in front of the mirror with the pot of concealer in
her hand. She seems to ponder for a moment as she looks at herself, almost as if trying to recognize
what she's seeing.

It's been years.

A silly smile takes over your mouth as she returns the pot to its place without applying anything,
and you can't resist the urge to kiss her cheek. She grins a little uncertainly at you...But cheerful.
Small steps, one at a time.

You follow her downstairs. You yawning and wishing the nest back and Lilith perfectly fine as if
she had slept her best, even with probably only 3 or 4 hours of sleep. She still has that perfect
posture. Impressive.

The kids are all asleep in the living room. Willow and Gus with King in their midst. Amity and
Luz slept facing each other and you could swear by the position of their hands...They could have
slept holding hands.
Ah, the teenage love. So soft and romantic.

You hoped they would find out how they felt soon enough.

You're still yawning as you start to make toast for the kids. But you feel your tiredness drift away a
little when Lilith hands you a mug of hot chocolate, completely lactose-free, in your hands. It
smells particularly good. She kisses your forehead almost unconsciously as she walks away with
her mug of apple blood.

You remember thinking that you could easily get used to a routine like this. She starts preparing
breakfast for witches, pinning her hair up in a bun and she looks beautiful.

"Stop mentally complimenting me, Y/N." She complains back and you chuckle softly before
returning to your activity, taking a sip of your particularly good chocolate.

The kitchen smells like chocolate, apple blood, and toast. An interesting mix.

Yeah. You can easily get used to it.

(...)

It's a few minutes later when the owl lady enters the kitchen. She is still in her pajamas and her hair
looks a mess, but she seems pleased to see you both.

But then...Eda takes a few deep and fast breaths, and you frown, thinking that she looks like a dog
when they smell meat. She looks at you next, at Lilith after, and smiles in a quite mischievous
way.

"The shower didn't take away the smell." She stated simply as she walked to the refrigerator. Your
ears heat up, but not as much as Lilith's on the stove, completely red. Apparently, it wasn't just
their hearing that witches had keen.

Eda pours herself a mug of apple blood and then turns to the two of you. Her smile becomes wider,
but...Warmer. She approaches Lilith first, pulling her away from the stove, where she was working
on what you think are omelets, to wrap her arms around her sister's shoulders.

"Congratulations, sis." Your heart expands to the point where you think it might burst out of your
chest. Lilith opens and closes her mouth, completely shocked for a moment. You don't even
wonder how long it's been since the last time they hugged. You feel like...It's been a while. She
swallows hard before wrapping her arms around her sister's back, closing her eyes to plunge into
the embrace.

You don't know why your eyes are watering. Maybe it's her emotions, or maybe not. But your eyes
tickle when you look at them, cuddled in the middle of the kitchen, for much more than a minute.
They were becoming those little girls you saw in that picture again. Together. Best friends. And
that...That really makes you happy.

"I'm proud of you." She then says, pulling her face away so she can hold Lilith's cheeks between
her hands. You notice as Eda traces the freckles with her fingertips, almost mapping them, just as
you had done. "It's good to have you back." Your girlfriend smiles, luminous, her eyes seem bright
with unshed tears. And you don't think Eda's look much different. You wish you had your cell
phone now so you could covertly take a picture, but you think your memory is already decent.

The Clawthorne sisters. Deadly if you were the wrong person, but around each other...They melt.
The owl lady turns to you then and her smile becomes vastly more playful and amused. She lets
Lilith's face go and you barely have time to blink.

You widen your eyes as she runs towards you and picks you up in a high, tight hug.

"WELCOME TO THE FAMILY, LITTLE SISTER!" You laugh out loud as Eda takes you in her
arms like you weigh nothing and spins around the kitchen. Lilith's laughing and you don't think
you've ever had a memory as worthy of a family movie as that. It's just...Pure affection filling your
heart as you cling to the owl lady's shoulders to keep from falling.

When Eda puts you down again, your legs are a little soft, but you couldn't care less. You propel
yourself to kiss her on the cheek.

"Thank you." Her eyes crinkle at the corners as she smiles broadly. It's different.

You swallow hard. These people. These people really want you.

For the first time in a really long time, you truly feel like you have a family. People who care about
you, people who accept you for who you are. You don't have to change.

Not at all.

You're thankful that Eda turned to get some toast because your eyes filled with tears too quickly
and you didn't want to ruin this moment just because you were a mess. However, she notices it. Of
course, she notices it.

Lilith grins at you before reaching out to curl her fingers into yours, gently squeezing them around
yours.

"Everything okay?" She asks, and her voice caresses your nerves from within your consciousness.

"I just didn't expect it." She frowns slightly, her eyes becoming cloudy with doubt. "I didn't expect
to find home here." Home. Home it's not the human world. Home it's where they are. Lilith smiles
then, wide and warm before moving close enough to touch your cheek with her fingertips. It's just
her fingers now that her nails are short but still so good to feel.

"I know it's not the dream family, but..." You just shake your head negatively and lean over to rub
your face against her hand.

"It's perfect." Eda's throat clearing is what makes you pull away a little from the other witch.

"As happy as I am, that doesn't mean I'm willing to see you two eating each other around." You try
to hold back your laughter at the not-so-good expression Lilith made at her sister, but it slips out
eventually.

"As If I was the one with the reputation for getting caught. Should I remind you of that time with
Raine in the broom cupboard at school?" You watch the owl lady's face turn completely red as she
brings the mug to her mouth, probably to try to cover up the blush.

"Shut up, Lily." You are curious to know who Raine is and what happened in the broom cupboard
at school, but decide that can wait when you hear the very clear sound of King complaining about
someone stepping on his tail.

Now you had five kids to take care of.

(...)

The house was a real mess during breakfast. Further than during the night, probably because now
the kids were all rested and had several plans as they gorged themselves on toast, cereal, and a
juice that you didn't risk drinking. You like the noise, the excitement...It's not something you used
to have much of, so it's just relaxing to hear the kids talking so much, to watch Eda ruffle Luz's
hair, and then help King up to the table. The world's dumbest expression probably appearing on
your face when you see Lilith hand a cupcake to Hooty's beak and then stroke his head gently.

Was this how a family was supposed to feel? Belonging? You fell into this strange world...And
strangely enough...This is where you belong.

Uneven Odds right? Right.

It's Hooty who brings you out of the reveries that were taking over your mind at the moment. He
squeals loud enough to be awkward and then glides back to the door of the living room. You raise
your eyebrows, Eda and Lilith do the same before you follow the tube bird into the room.

There are two hooded people in the room. Dementors are your first thought, it sends a chill down
your spine. You shake your head negatively next, there was no way it could be dementors, but you
still wish you had your glyph pad in your back pocket.

"WHO ARE YOU?" Hooty half shouts, half screeches as all his feathers became ruffled.

There is a humorless laugh that echoes throughout the room before the first person pulls up their
hood. It's...A woman. She has a round face with very intense blue eyes and her hair...Oh. Now
things make sense.

"Hm. So I suppose you are the owl house?" She asks with a little smirk that for some reason makes
all your defenses go up immediately. It looks innocent, but it's the kind of wry smile your mother
would have. The kind of fake smile she would put on her mouth to say how proud she was of
something you had done for her friends.

"I am a very important house, I control everything." Hooty replied with an excited little peep, not
the least bit suspicious of the intruders anymore.

"Mother?" Amity pushes Gus aside to make it into the room. You don't know why, but a rather
bitter taste takes over your mouth.

"What did I tell you, Luz?" Eda murmurs in a low tone to the girl who just shrugged her shoulders
with wide eyes as if she didn't expect this visit either.

"Amity, dear. Good. You're already here. Get your things. We have an appointment." The second
person in the room pulls back the hood to reveal a middle-aged man, square chin, messy, rain-
splashed hair, purple-lensed glasses rested on his brown locks.

"Appointment?" Amity doesn't contest, you realize. She starts gathering her things in the room
without hesitation, almost worried. You don't like that, for some reason. It hits too close to home,
so to speak.

"I'll explain on the way..." The woman stops when she notices that there are at least 6 other people
in the room, watching the scene without many reactions to offer. "Edalyn, still without a Coven, I
imagine." Sarcasm is quite evident, dripping off her tongue as her blue eyes sparkle with an
amusement that seems clear only to her. You did not like this woman. It's impossible for you not to
raise your eyebrows, your eyes going to Lilith while Gus, Willow, and Luz go to help Amity. You
want to ask her about this extremely humble woman. But your girlfriend is not looking at you and
the bond is in complete silence, she seems almost alarmed by this woman's presence. Quite
alarmed. Your eyebrows frown slightly. Why?

"When you cast an illusion spell again we can discuss that. Okay, Odalia?" The woman, Odalia
Blight, from what you remember moistens her lower lip without dispensing a smile. The man, who
appears to be Amity's father doesn't seem too interested in chatting, he looks around and walks over
to the first thing that catches his eye. In this case, Hooty.

"You haven't changed a bit, Eda." Her eyes trail across the room, pause on you for a single second,
and then simply ignore you as if you simply aren't worth the time. You really didn't like this
woman. You feel the uneasiness under your skin at that.

Her eyes widen then, the drawn eyebrows rising on her face as she finally notices the last adult in
the room.

"Lilith?!" And it sounds more like an exclamation than a question when she says your girlfriend's
name.

It's discomfort emanating from her now. You can perfectly feel the waves of pure embarrassment
coming from Lilith, which only increases as the woman leaves her cloak on the hat rack and
approaches with a smirk that is just too big. Oh. She has a body...Curvaceous to say the least, thick
hips. She is pretty. Exceptionally pretty.

"I haven't seen you since..." She stops then, her eyes glittering with a kind of knowledge you didn't
appreciate, her smile opening wider, if remotely possible. "Well..." You don't like how that sounds,
honestly. Something incredibly bitter is rising from your stomach to your throat. "You're looking
good..." Her eyes roam the surroundings as if analyzing the owl house. "Despite your
accommodations." And when her eyes return to your girlfriend's face she seems to frown for a
moment, almost as if she sees something on her face. Probably her freckles. Lilith hadn't shown
those to anyone in years and you weren't about to let this strange woman make her even more
uncomfortable.

"Hi. I'm Y/N, we haven't been introduced. And you are?" You reach out, with your most falsely
bright smile, almost slipping yourself between the woman and Lilith, wanting to keep her as far
away from her as you can.

Stay away. You try to make your expressions show that. Stay away before I rip out that smirk off
your face.

Yet Odalia ignores you completely. A little bug in her way. She is tall enough for you to think that
you could actually be a little bug. Why was everyone in the Boiling Isles so tall?

"Not interested." She simply replies, scorn glistening on her white teeth at that comment. You
open and then close your mouth again. You are not sure if you really heard that right. She
really...Petty woman. Horrible woman. Uh. It takes everything in you not to growl. Who exactly is
this woman to act like this with other people? "But I didn't know that this house had become a
refuge for humans." She raises her eyebrows at Eda who just rolls her eyes, wordlessly saying that
she didn't owe anyone an explanation, let alone her. Apparently, you and your sister-in-law shared
opinions about Amity's mother. "Anyway..." She turns her body so she could meet Lilith again and
your teeth grit, quite hard. Why is this woman surrounding your girlfriend while she clearly seems
totally uncomfortable with her presence?

However, Odalia stops for a moment, silencing whatever she would say next. She frowns
pronouncedly as she rests her hands on her hips on the white vest she's wearing. She sniffs the air
for a moment and you already know what's coming next. It was predictable. The witch's eyes
widen again, first toward you and then toward Lilith once more.

"Even for you, this is too low, Lilith." You've heard worse. A lot worse. It doesn't really hit, you
just raise an eyebrow and roll your eyes, almost in the same way as Eda. Still, you didn't expect
what happened next. Not really. Because the next thing you know is that Lilith almost growls. A
guttural sound that makes the hair on the back of your neck stand up at the end.

Fierce. Furious. You like that.

"I'm not in the mood to stand you, Odalia." And her voice sounds like a knife. Sharp and quite
powerful. The woman pouts as she shakes her head negatively, almost disappointed. It's disgust
that bubbles up in you. She reaches a hand to touch Lilith's chin with the tip of her finger, which
she quickly pushes away, pushing her head back as if the touch burned. Good thing, you were
already thinking about which object was the sharpest and closest.

"You used to be more flexible with me, Lili." Wha...What? Oh, you're going to be sick. Is she...Is
she really...Is she implying? Oh, you're sure to throw up in the nearest garbage can.

"Mom! I'm ready. Let's go!" Amity seems to notice the tension forming in the room. You believe
your and Eda's faces glow with the same menacing shade of red. If she...If she really...Oh,
that's...You let out a breath through your nose trying to calm your mind, trying to push away the
mental image of kicking that woman in the shin.

"Of course, my dear." The girl offers an apologetic look at you, before leaving to pull her father by
the hand. You want to wave and say that she doesn't have to apologize for anything, but she's
already far away. The kids walk her to the door, probably to say goodbye.

"When you get tired of playing with this little thing..." Little thing. Hm. Height jokes or value
jokes. You have no idea, but it doesn't matter to you. The woman who from that day on would be
at the top of your Death Note continued. "You can always call me...I really like the ordinary look, it
suits you well." She offers a little wink to your girlfriend before dragging her fingers along her
wrist gently. Lilith pulls her arm rapidly enough for you to think that the touch could be physically
painful. Would she have the power to curse you if you chew on her arm?

Odalia Blight leaves, taking her cloak back. She still looks one last time at Lilith before leaving the
house, a too suggestive smile on that mouth. The cloying smell of too expensive perfume lingers in
the room as you stop yourself from going to kick the door closed to make sure she wouldn't come
back.

"Hmmm...I will..." Eda starts, probably sensing in the air and seeing on your face how aggravated
you were."I don't know I'll do anything not to be the third wheel in this discussion." She turns back
to the kitchen and your eyes shift to the witch a few steps away. To be fair she looks astonished.
Emotions are kind of messed up, you feel a bit of shame, disgust even.

You were about to open your mouth to ask what the hell had just happened when she spoke.

"Can we go upstairs?" She looks at you as she frowns slightly, her breathing a little altered.

"Sure." Her fingers are extremely cold as they wrap around yours and guide you up the stairs. It's a
silent walk, the stillness rests both physically and mentally, the bond remains completely wordless.

It's not until you enter her room again and she locks the door that Lilith lets out a long sigh as if she
was holding it all the way. And she probably was. She runs her fingers through her hair next,
nervously.

"Mind to explain?" You ask, not in an accusatory tone. What you saw was a strange woman clearly
flirting with your girlfriend who seemed to want to run to the first hole that came along.

"Hmm..." She takes another breath as she sits down in her desk chair, rubbing her temples with her
fingertips. You frown as you lean your hips against the wood. "Do you remember the girl who
didn't like my freckles?" Your eyebrows frown for a moment, your neurons taking longer than an
inch of a second to make the connection between the two pieces of information rattling around in
your head.

But when you finally understand. Your lips part. Your eyebrows drop.

"No...." You begin in a low tone and Lilith lets out a humorless chuckle.

"Yeah..." She confirms and you feel that it's quite possible that your nausea will become physical
now. She...She was the girl she dated, one of the bastards who made her so insecure about herself.
That girl was Amity's mother. Oh. That is. Ew. Just the image makes goosebumps run the entire
length of your spine.

"You dated Amity's mom?" She...And Odalia. Uh. Your skin shivers as the taste seems even more
bitter in your throat. You don't care that she's Lilith's ex, not really, not that she's not pretty and stirs
up some bad feelings in you. What really makes you feel truly horrible is that...She has changed
absolutely nothing from what you could see. She's still a pretty bad person who treats the people
around her like nothing.

You should have kicked her in the shin when you had the chance.

"She wasn't Amity's mother at the time." Lilith adds then with an amused smile, probably because
of the grimace that rests on your face right now. You simply can't control this. Ew. The bond is
probably contributing to this feeling, not just a certain discomfort, but a certain clear urge to tear
your own skin off at the thought. There is a bit of possession as well. You just shake your head
negatively, as if that way you can send that intruding thought away.

"Ew!" It comes out of your mouth loudly. Even though Lilith has probably heard it a few times.

"She was cute and even kind sometimes." She proceeds as she shrugs. As if she was trying to
justify why she would date someone...Like that woman. As if you want to know the least about
that woman. Cute. Kind. Oh. Okay. You can certainly believe that. For some reason, your jaw
clenches as you cross your arms over your chest.

"Are you really telling me what it was like dating Amity's mother?" The question comes out in a
pretty clear tone. You certainly don't need a more detailed mental picture than the one you're
already building. You raise an eyebrow, snorting without even realizing it.

Bitterness fills your mouth, while that ugly red feeling takes over you, all over your body. The way
she touched Lilith's wrist, the way she seemed to be staring at a piece of meat. Oh. You should
have hit her face when you had the chance. Her face, her shin, whatever. Why did she think she
had the right to touch Lilith? Your girlfriend? Petty woman, horrible woman. Woman... Argh, you
have to hold back your instincts not to snort again. Your face feels incredibly hot as you sink your
nails into your palms.

"Y/N." Your eyes go to her again as she calls your name in a precise tone. Lilith has the corners of
her mouth twitched in a failed attempt to control a smile. For someone who looked so
uncomfortable two minutes ago, she seems even too amused. "Are you jealous?" The question
echoes as you stare her in the eye. How could you deny it? You twitch your lips, tempted not to
answer the question because just the image of that woman with her hands on her makes you a little
sick in your stomach. Your hair stands on end once more and you just look away from Lilith. Yes,
you were. Awfully jealous. Because Odalia Blight wanted to eat your girlfriend. "Oh, Titan. Are
you?" Her eyes widen and a huge smile expands on her mouth as if it was the most amazing thing
in the world that you were jealous.

You know that jealousy is an ugly and stupid thing to feel. But you can't help it. Possession is a
horrible thing to feel, but what can you say when that woman touches your girlfriend in front of
you, insinuating things without even changing the color of her face...It's not fair. You feel your lips
twitching again. Lilith laughs at your lack of response. A delicious laugh that seems to make you
feel even stupider than you already do. Your ears are boiling.

"Shut up, Lilith." You mutter between your teeth and sigh deeply afterward. In the end, Odalia was
a beautiful woman and she clearly still had some kind of interest in Lilith. It's not as if you were
particularly wrong in this story.

You were doing so well 10 minutes ago. Enjoying breakfast at the Owl House, enjoying the
familiar feeling. And then this damned woman walks in the house and makes bitterness bubble up
in you like soda. The indifference because you are human. The flirting. The superior aura.

You hate how this woman was able to get into your mood and completely ruin it.

You sigh one more time before you move away from Lilith's desk needing to breathe.

"Oh, no. Come here." You feel her hand wrap around your wrist and then pull you hard enough so
that you fall sitting on her lap. You don't resist, because you're not sure you can resist. She's
stronger and more persuasive. "There is no reason for you to be jealous." Her voice against your
ear makes your whole body shudder as her hands wrap firmly around your waist. "She was a part
of my life that I would rather forget." Her fingers spread nonchalantly across your belly skin as she
speaks, which doesn't stop them from sending shivers down your spine. They seem warmer now.
"You...You are my mate." She whispers the word now, rubbing the tip of her nose against your
earlobe. "More than girlfriend, you are my mate." Her fingers almost unconsciously caress your
ribs, spreading a warm sensation all over your skin. "My beautiful, stubborn mate." She clamps
your earlobe between her teeth before pulling gradually. Your whole body trembles with the feeling
and your cheeks heat up. It's so easy for her it's ridiculous.

She wraps you around her fingertips like a string. She has so much power over your being that it
should be considered strange.

"I hate you." You whisper the same thing you said last night. Lilith lets out a low laugh against
your skin, so aware of the effect she has on you.

Her fingers gently reach inside your pants, caressing the curve of your waist with her fingertips.
You try to hold back, but the sigh is simply impossible to control. Her fingers are warm and spread
a very welcome sensation all over your body.

It's quite easy to forget that you were pissed off in the first place when she touches you so gently
like this.

You feel her lips move slowly down your ear to your neck, where she leaves a warm, delicate kiss.
You squeeze your fingers against your hand. Why did you have to be so weak for her? Why does
she only need a few touches and a few words to have you in the palm of her hand?

Why do you always need her to touch you so badly?

"But I wouldn't mind proving that I'm serious." She giggles again, one of her hands coming up to
meet your cheek and then forcing you to turn to face her eyes. They look pretty amused now,
slightly aroused. Silver and green, they seem to blend. She moistens her lower lip with the tip of
her tongue as she looks at you, and you almost can't hold back the urge to close your legs. Damned
woman. She tilts her head as she looks at you, she seems to be pondering for a moment as she
gently runs her fingers along your chin. Those fingers. Long, slender ones that were inside you a
few hours ago. You shiver at the thought of them returning to where they were.

Your cheeks burn and something tells you that she knows perfectly well what is going on in your
head, even though you haven't used the bond.

"Open your mouth." It doesn't sound like a request, not in the least bit like how she asked earlier.
Her voice sounds slightly hoarse and her breathing quickens. She's commanding. She's not asking.
The brat in you really wants to say "Make me," but you think you can tease her later. Right now
you just want to feel that she wants you.

You part your lips for her. Lilith caresses your lower lip with her thumb, gently, as if drawing,
marking, and then she pushes it into your mouth. "Suck it", you hear her say without having to
speak and immediately follow her request which again sounded like an order. You suck her finger,
feeling the skin's softness on the tip of your tongue. Lilith takes a deep breath for a moment before
removing her thumb to return with her index and middle finger. You know it's already dripping
between your legs.

It's so easy for her.

Those fingers would easily be the reason for your death. And the way those eyes darken with
desire makes your cheeks completely red.

She wants you. She wants to fuck you. That's a great stimulant. That's a great way to forget that
woman.

When she moves her fingers into your mouth, you find it almost impossible to hold back the moan
inside your throat. How? How does she bring out the heat so effortlessly in you? She's just pulling
and pushing her fingers into your mouth and you think it's quite possible that you'll pass out.

Oh, Titan. It's hard enough to breathe. It's hard to breathe as your body heats up in flames of need
for her. Always and only for her.

When she pulls her fingers back, you barely have time to complain before her mouth hits yours.
Her lips are still soft and the taste is still delicious on your tongue. But she's not gentle. She kisses
you as if...As if she wants to destroy you. Her tongue glides over yours with such ferocity it's hard
to keep up.

This woman. This woman is stealing all your breath, clasping her hands around you hard enough to
mark. Her mouth feels like it's boiling, and the breath against your face feels extremely shallow.

You feel her fingers return to where they originally were, playing with the waistband of your pants.
Your whole body shivers and you are sure that she is grinning against your mouth. Damn woman.
She's having so much fun making you so unstable.

She pulls away, slides her lips down your neck, sinking her nose into your shoulder's juncture.
"Spread your legs for me, love." Oh. Pet name. Her voice sounds against your skin again, and it
chills every hair on the back of your neck. You feel extremely overstimulated and she's not even
touching you yet. It's just her voice, sounding husky against your skin. Just her fingers playing with
the hem of your clothes. You shouldn't have. There was still an amount of resentment bubbling up
in you. But how can you help yourself? She only needs a few words for you to melt around her like
butter. She only needs a few words to make you dripping and needing her so bad that you think
you're going to explode.

Your legs spread almost of their own accord and Lilith lets out a short sigh against your skin. The
idea that she's panting, she's panting to fuck you. Oh. That shakes your whole body. This woman
really wants to make you come, you know that. And that makes your legs weak.

She slides her right hand into your pants, ignoring any other piece of fabric in her way. When her
fingers reach your legs' apex you feel that you have probably lost all capacity for coherent thought.
She slides her fingers gently up and down, testing every reaction of your body. Your breath is lost
and only becomes weaker when her other hand comes up, with a fairly sure path.

She's like a drug, a numbing mist around you, completely hallucinating, completely addictive. Who
needs narcotics when Lilith can make you dizzy with a few touches? She changes the pressure of
her fingers as her free hand slides into your bra and you choke. Your hips thrusting toward the
touch in a reflex of need that is quite evident. You hear her giggle again, but you're not sure if it
was in the bond or not.

You feel that you just don't whimper when she pulls her hand from between your legs because you
still have enough presence of mind. Her fingers glisten with your juices.

"Oh, my dear..." She whispers before bringing her fingers to her own mouth. Your eyes follow the
movement, but you find that your consciousness does not. Your inner muscles tighten as she sucks
on her own fingers. Holy shit, Lilith Clawthorne.

She finds your mouth again. Your taste's in her mouth as she slides her hand to the place it
shouldn't have left. Your whole body twitches again. It's too much stimulation, both hands playing
with you, the tongue making it so hard to breathe. Her smell. Her taste. The heat that exudes from
her in waves and seems to envelop you.

You can barely think.

And you really don't have time to think about it, as two of her fingers slide into you a second later.
Your eyes widen. Your heart races fast enough that it feels like it's pounding all over your body.
She has made you dizzy. The filling has made you dizzy. You pull your mouth away from hers to
try to breathe, to try to do anything but gasp.

"Li-Lilith." You grab her wrist almost to anchor yourself to that reality when her fingers begin to
move in and out of you. Your inner muscles contract harder. That, your legs begin to tremble. Oh,
Titan. She...You feel that even your fingers are trembling around her. How is that remotely
possible?

"There, there." She whispers, moving her lips up to your neck, brushing her mouth across your
jugular vein. She isn't really calming your spirits. "Shhh...I'm right here, just breathe." You
swallow hard even without realizing it, nodding as you let go of her wrist. You take a deep breath
as her fingers pause for a moment. "Good girl." She murmured back, making your whole face turn
red at the compliment. That voice. Uh. Damn voice. Damn woman.

Her fingers slide more easily into you and you find that if there is a meaning in life. That's it. It's
this woman pumping her fingers inside you as she breathes impatiently against your neck. It's this
woman caressing your breast with her fingertips, her body so pressed against yours that you think it
quite possible that your heartbeat is perfectly in tune. Heaven is not a place...It's a woman.

It's difficult to reason. Especially when she curls her fingers and reaches for that sweet spot. Your
back twitches, the sweat already pooling on the back of your neck. She's a attentive girlfriend.
When her fingers return she finds that same spot, her teeth sinking into the jugular vein. Rough.
Too much stimulation. You won't last like this.

"Lilith...Lilith I'm..." You can't complete the thought with words but she understands perfectly.
You don't need words. Not when she hears you with body and mind.

"It's okay, baby." Another pet name. And her voice sounds like velvet as she soothes the skin she
just nearly broke with the tip of her tongue. Her fingers thrust harder. It's so close, a knot in your
stomach, about to break. "Come for me." She didn't command it this time, but you don't think it
matters.

The knot loosens and the thing between your legs explodes. When you come, it's like being hit on
the head. Everything around you seems to spin a bit as your head dives into a delicious lethargic
state, the middle of your legs throbs, and you think it's relatively possible that you'll become a jelly
on the floor.

Incredibly, that's not what you want to do. You can hardly breathe. But the thought is clear and
sounds under your skin.

"You did so great, my dear." She whispers then as she gently pulls her fingers out of you. You're
probably a mess. But do you care? Not really.

"I want it." That's the first thing you say, turning your head to look Lilith straight in the eye. Her
pupils are twice the size and her cheeks are completely flushed. She frowns as if she really hasn't
understood your point.

"What?" She seems genuinely curious about what you want after a mind-blowing orgasm.

"I want to taste you." She opens and then closes her mouth. It's clear that this is not what she was
expecting. Surprise settles on her, in her slightly alarmed eyes and her slightly pronounced
eyebrows.

Lilith had versatile energy...Just like you, a little more top, but still flexible. Yet you feel that this is
something that she doesn't let anyone give her in a long time. It's something that could be
challenging for someone who always wanted to be in control of everything, like her.

"Please." You add next, trying to make your face as adorable as possible. Lilith moistens her lower
lip with the tip of her tongue again. You can identify much of her emotions. She looks a little
thoughtful. "Please?" You ask again, tilting your head just a little downward.

And you imagine that your puppy eyes convince her because she nods. And there is no hesitation
when she does. Your heart pumps faster. That would be interesting.

You rise from her lap quickly, not caring if your legs fail you a little. It doesn't really matter. You
pull her by the hand toward the nest, and her fingers feel a little cooler than before.

Due to her large stature, it was usually you who was always looking up to meet her eyes, so it's just
interesting to have to look down now. It's very interesting to be on top of her. You like it. Very
much.
Your lips meet hers as your fingers slide easily down the sides of her pants. Her hipbones are
another of your favorite parts of her body. They are sharp and remarkably sensitive. You pull the
pants out of the way, along with any other piece of fabric as your tongue slides into her mouth.
You want to take care of her, just as she takes care of you. Your fingers run through her. Lilith
shudders, her fingers sinking into your back. She's already soaking wet, which you couldn't say
didn't massage your ego. She's like this because she was making you come.

The heat exhaling from her. Her breathing starting to get a little shallow against your face. The way
her body feels. You will spend your life pleasing this woman in every possible way and you don't
even blink when this information runs through your head. She is yours. You are hers.

She's no angel, but she's my religion.

You pull away for a moment and you look at her. Her cheeks are red and her lips are swollen. She
looks beautiful. Still a little ashamed, a little embarrassed. A small worry rests on your shoulders.
If she didn't want that...There were other ways.

"I...Lilith if you don't...." But she's already denying it with her head, pushing away any hesitation of
yours with just a gesture. She raises her hands, wraps your hair with her fingertips, before simply
pushing your head down. Her breathing seems quite short now.

Oh. You came into this world to please, and that's what you're going to do.

You pull the pants down the rest of the legs. And you think you salivate when you see her like
that. You could taste it on your fingers. But you want the source.

When you slip between her legs, you're sure you've just found heaven on earth. Her taste explodes
in your mouth as her hips contract forward, her fingers sinking into your head. This is simply the
most delicious thing you have ever tasted in your entire life. It's dangerous that she can't get you
off, ever again.

You sink your fingers into her thighs and do the job you believe you were born to do. You follow
her every reaction, every gasp, every breathe, every contraction of her hips as your mouth tries to
kiss her as gently and as intensely as possible. She tastes wonderful, and she makes such lovely
little sounds.

Again. If there is a heaven. It's not a place. It's a woman. She's Eden. This kind of heresy, tasting
heresy on the tip of your tongue is simply the most satisfying thing in the world.

"Use your fingers." You feel a tension in her voice through the bond, she is panting, she is clinging
to you as if she needs to anchor herself to this place. And you do as she tells you, as is the usual
thing to do. You slide one finger in first and then the second, she receives you with anticipation and
warmth. And it's perfect. She's perfect for you in so many ways and nuances.

You know she is almost there when you curl your fingers to try to find the right spot. Her fingers
squeeze your scalp tighter as her body begins to tense around you, her powerful thighs closing
around you.

You are sure you wouldn't mind if she choked you.

You just have to push your fingers in one more time while sucking at just the right spot so that she
lets out a low sound from deep in her throat before she comes apart in your mouth. Your eyes lift to
her. And she looks like a goddess when she comes, her cheeks so red, accentuating how pale her
skin is, slight signs of sweat, and her breathing completely lost.
Giving her an orgasm is almost as good as having one of your own. Probably because of the relief
she gives you through the bond. It feels good. And quite relaxing.

You place one more kiss on her inner thigh before you rise from between her legs to lie down
beside her. Her breathing is short, but you find that yours is no different. So you just stay beside
her, waiting for whatever comes next. The world could end now, you're not sure you care.

This must be what running a marathon feels like.

"No one..." Lilith mumbles in a slightly husky tone, your eyes go to her, but she has hers on the
mobile, which gives you a view of her sharp jaw. "No one has touched me like this...Since...A long
time." You weren't wrong. Lilith has shut herself off for years and you imagine that sex wasn't one
of her major priorities in the Emperor's Coven.

She's silent for a few seconds as if testing her next words.

"I know that..." You frown slightly as her emotions change a bit, the specter rekindles with a purple
that makes you a little worried. "I'm not the easiest of witches." She finally meets your eyes, a
small smile rising on her mouth. "And sometimes I'm afraid that I won't be able to be the best for
you." Your heart sinks a little in your chest. It would still take you some time to get it into that hard
head that she was...Everything. Your religion. "But I like the feeling of trying." It's a little
melancholy to put it that way, but isn't that one of the reasons you fell in love with her? You love
that melancholy look. One day you'll write a song about it.

And you made her feel good. She is satisfied if a little melancholy.

"I don't know if you noticed." You start as the smile gets incredibly wide on your face with a
specific thought. You move close enough to rest your head on her shoulder so that you can look her
in the eye, perfectly. There are golden streaks on the green and blue streaks on the silver. The
freckles bring out their color so well. "But you are my mate, officially now. No returns accepted."
She raises a hand, and your fingers instinctively curl with hers. She's warm now and they look so
good together. "It's me. It's you. It's us." You whisper. She raises her eyebrows at you, slightly
amused. "It's a quote from a horror show with a heartbreaking story." Lilith tilts her head to rest her
cheek on the top of your head.

You can't help but think about how things took different turns that morning. Less than two hours
and you were already in the nest again. You also can't help but wonder what Eda must have been
thinking.

"Us...I like the sound of that." And her fingers tighten around yours. You can't see her eyes, but you
don't need to.

There's nothing in your head when you close your eyes but her and the way her breath rises and
falls in a rhythmic sound. It's golden behind them when you allow any mental barriers to fall away.

And then...Two are one. You feel her. You embrace her.

Us.

And it does sound good.

 Chapter 18
Chapter Summary

The one with fear ances.

Chapter Notes

First of all, I would like to apologize for the delay. This chapter is substantially longer
than the others and I started living alone again this week, started working, had a lot of
university work to torture me. But anyway. Here we are.

Second of all, this story is not over, I didn't have a chance to answer your comments
yet (but I already read it, I love you all), but this story will have at least a second part, I
already wrote the script and as soon as I have the first chapters ready I will start
posting.

Finally, thank you to everyone who read this story so far and all the love you gave to
me and my work worshiping Lilith Clawthorne.

I hope you enjoy this last chapter (of this first part) and that's it.

Thank you again, love you.

Anyone who had a glance at Lilith Clawthorne in her coven days would say that she was an
unbreakable witch.

She was a witch who knew where she was going. She knew exactly what she was doing. She
would never let herself be shaken by anything. She was strong, she was centered, she was the third
most powerful witch in the boiling isles, respected where she stepped. She was a brick wall, an
unstoppable storm, she answered to no one but Emperor Belos. Nothing deserved her loyalty but
the emperor.

Nothing would stop her but the emperor.

Every day she woke up with a focus and a mission in mind. She would not linger observing the
lifeless ceiling of her room, or the lifelessness her room had overall. Unstoppable.

She would open her eyes. She would stand up. She would check her duties put in order of priority
and start walking around the castle to make sure all the troops were doing their jobs correctly.

She was the inspiration of the new generation of witches. The words success and dedication carried
her name.

Anyone who knew her before would say that she was someone impossible to break. Made not of
iron but pure steel. Nothing could strike her because she had no weak points.
A perfect soldier. Molded to obey. Molded to do whatever was necessary.

Someone impossible to break in half, who even when on the brink of death in battle would die with
a smile on her face.

Someone who could not be struck by love, because she had simply forgotten what that was. And
someone who could never be struck by hate because there was no one she hated more...Than
herself.

Who could have known that underneath her steel skin, underneath her cold eyes, her sarcasm
dripping with venom, her posture as firm as a statue...There was someone who couldn't live with
herself?

Lilith hated every second of her existence almost as much as she hated herself.

She stuck her head in paperwork, in training, in missions. She filled her head as much as she could.
This is how she lived, trying to survive with the guilt and the fact that no one... No one...

No one would ever look at her with the slightest bit of affection on their face. No one would
simply listen to her talk about her day. Because...Who the hell would want to talk to someone as
hateful as she was?

She clung to the crumbs Belos offered. She believed that a "well done" and a "very good" was all
she needed...But that was all she had. For years.

Years.

For years all she could think about was pleasing that man because it was the only interaction she
regularly received from anyone.

Lilith got used to sleeping three hours a night.

She got used to being quiet while the emperor murdered wild witches and broke their palismen to
stay healthy. She convinced herself that this was right. Believing that he would save Eda. Believing
that he could fix the biggest mistake of her whole life.

Because if he healed her...Eda would be fine. The guilt would go away, the weight on her
shoulders would go away. She could have a sister again. They could be united in the coven like
they were when they were young. Best friends.

All those dreams, bad dreams... They would stop.

She could keep fooling herself, or trying to fool herself. But it was the only thing that allowed her
to sleep. The only thing that would stop the dreams, the dreams that wouldn't leave her alone even
when she was awake.

For how long had Eda, Eda's ghost, kept her sane? For how long was that connection lost in time
all she had to keep her up every day?

Tomorrow I will be able to bring her in. Tomorrow he will heal her. Tomorrow this will be over.

There were days when she felt that there was only her and Riven. The only being that could
stand...Someone like her. She still doesn't understand how he just hasn't flown away over the years.
Titan knows he had reasons for it.
She didn't deserve even such a good little bird in her life.

But then...That happened.

The moment the emperor said what he intended. The moment he left the throne room.

She...

She broke, as perfectly as a piece of crystal.

Perfectly.

"You deserved to be petrified. Not Eda." That's what Luz said. And she was never more right. She
was that thing with no feelings, while her sister was willing to die for a little girl.

Never.

No one had the right to lay a single finger on her sister.

She broke in half.

She realized that...If Eda had joined the coven. They would have killed her. Not physically, but
inside. Eda was free, chaotic, smiling, and kind. A few weeks in the coven, with whispers,
nightmares, too many harsh words and...Well, worse things...Things Lilith didn't like to think
about. No. She would never allow it.

She betrayed the emperor. She stood by her sister for the first time in years. And she didn't regret it
for a single second. It was the least she could do...After so long and after all she had done.

And Eda accepted her.

Even knowing everything. She didn't just forgive her. She accepted her. She took her by the hand
and showed her that nothing had to be awful. They could face anything, as long as they were
together. It was a slap in the face. More than a slap in the face. It was a punch in the stomach, the
kind that steals the air and makes vomit build up in her throat. Her little sister. She didn't hate her,
she didn't kick her out of her life for what she did. She simply was Eda...She simply gave her a
place in her life.

And she felt like shit for that, every day.

She would choose screams, cuts, eyes glittering with hate. It was what she got used to. After so
long you interpret a raised hand as something other than a pat on the back. You get chills just
hearing a sharper male voice, even if you know it's the Tv...And not him. You feel that you are not
welcome, even when everyone is smiling at you.

She didn't feel she deserved any of what had happened. She was the one who cursed Eda. She was
the one who hid it. She was the one who chose the emperor for so many years, choosing poor
validation over her family. She was the one who was this horrible creature for so long.

She constantly thought about leaving for another place. She never had a home besides her room in
the emperor's castle, but maybe she could have one, somewhere. Just to allow her sister to have her
family in peace. She certainly deserved that. Lilith believed that even Hooty would be better off
without her, he didn't deserve someone like her as a best friend. She was trying to live one day at a
time, trying to deal with everything that her head was thinking about every second of the day.
That was until you arrived. Stubborn. Insistent. Persistent. Kind. Loving.

You were the outlier. Completely outlier. She had nothing against humans before, not really. She
made fun of Luz before only because she was still trying to deal with everything she felt about Eda
and the curse and the Coven. But she found humans quite fascinating, to be honest. However, she
really didn't expect the human girl she helped because she realized she was a lost human as much
as her sister's adopted daughter to be her mate.

Lilith is no longer the witch who served in the emperor's coven. She no longer commands troops.
She doesn't obey orders anymore. And she doesn't intend to do that ever again.

When her eyes open in the first light of the morning, she doesn't think about her duties, or about
troops. She blinks a few times to get used to the brightness and the surroundings she has just
woken up to, and the first thing she sees, are shiny objects, producing little rainbows as they
receive the first rays of the morning sun. It's a beautiful sight to wake up to.

The somnolence is still taking hold of her, so she doesn't mind considering a few more minutes of
sleep.

She moves and her arms unconsciously wrap around the other body in the nest, seeking warmth
almost sleepwalkingly. The body is small compared to hers, but it fits so well with hers as if it was
born to be so. And it probably was. She breathes in the smell of your hair and wishes she could
make a moment like this become eternal or at least long enough for her to carry in her memory.

Lilith doesn't have substantial nice memories if she were honest. She doesn't think that after she
left her parents' house she has any worth keeping until she started living with Eda again.

Most of her memories...She'd rather not even touch.

So while she has been living in the Owl House she keeps every one of them.

She keeps the first time she made Eda laugh after discovering about the curse, warm and wide, a
laugh that almost made her cry. She keeps when King grabbed her leg in a hug for helping him
down from the kitchen table. She keeps the day she and Hooty became best friends. She keeps
every time Luz was proud of her for her advances in glyph magic. She keeps every smile she took
from you. She remembers and doesn't think she will ever be able to forget. Each one of them.

Lilith Clawthorne used to be unbreakable. But she...She is not. Not anymore.

She has something she can call family now and even if she thinks she doesn't deserve them...They
are the people she devotes herself to every day to protect and care for. She will make up for it.
Eda, Luz, Hooty, King, and you. She accepts it now. Even if she doesn't feel she deserves it...She
accepts the affection. Because she doesn't know if she can live any other way now.

She also doesn't think she's good at showing feelings. She was once a little more open as a child,
just a little. People were already cruel when she was young, and she could usually only talk to
Eda...And sometimes Raine. This got worse over the years. Now it's extremely complicated to say
how she feels or to find out how she feels. In the coven...If you indicated weakness or feelings in
general, things didn't end very well.

She's trying, though.

She always tries when she thinks about you.

She hopes that you all know...That you all know how important you are to her. How much she
would rather have Belos rip her heart out than hurt any of you again.

"Lith?" She hears you mumble a very sleepy, slow question, but she still understands. "What time
is it?" Her eyes move to the window, the sunlight still incipient, slowly creeping over the horizon.
Everything still seems a little dark.

"Early." She whispers against the back of your out head, your hair is smelling particularly good.
"Go back to sleep." She says next. Lilith is sure her voice sounds awful when it's hoarse like this.

"Okay." She wants to giggle because you didn't even want to question it. You could be a bear when
it came to sleep, and she thought that was quite adorable. She didn't laugh, though, because she felt
you gripping her fingers gently, entwining yours with hers and then pulling her even tighter against
you. You are exuding a very welcoming morning warmth and she can't stop herself from tightening
around you.

A small smile threatened to curl across her lips. It had been a few weeks now, but she would be
lying if she said she had gotten used to...The touch again.

How important is it to feel someone's touch? How long had she only had the comforting weight of
Riven between her neck and shoulder and that was all?

Lilith was once an unbreakable woman. But now she has a weak heart for the simplest things. And
when she closes her eyes again, pressing her fingers against yours, smelling her mate...She is sure
she doesn't care that her heart has softened.

And when she breathes. Long and soothing. She reckons. How rare and beautiful it is to even exist,
how rare and beautiful are the odds of you finding her. Of her finding you. Uneven.

She sleeps more than three hours a night now.

And she is fine with that.

(...)

When she opened her eyes again. The morning is already a little higher than before, the sun is
already a little too bright, which tells Lilith that she should get up. It's kind of ironic, but she is a
morning person.

She stretches her neck and sighs for a moment. Her eyes fall to you then and the smile slowly
spreads across her lips.

Lilith sneaks up to place a little kiss on your forehead before getting up from the nest. She's not
sleepy anymore and she didn't want to wake you up by tossing and turning. So she crawls out of the
nest and looks for comfortable clothes to go downstairs and make breakfast.

She doesn't forget to take a bottle of elixir. It tastes awful and burns her throat a little when she
swallows it, but it's worth it. Anything to keep the raven beast away from everyone, especially
away from you.

She remembers that. Of that thing in her head, enveloping her with that aura, preventing her from
controlling herself and her own feelings. And the terror that gripped her whole body when she
became conscious again and realized that she was one step away from...

Eda was already awake. And so was Luz. The two are talking about something outside, which
Lilith doesn't pay much attention to. She just caresses Hooty's head with a morning greeting and
then heads for the kitchen.

Lilith Clawthorne no longer has duties to perform. She now has chores that she enjoys doing. She
pours herself a mug of apple blood and realizes that Luz must have already had breakfast because
she left the cereal box on the table.

If a year ago someone asked Lilith to make a hot chocolate...She would ask what the hell hot
chocolate was, let alone one with no lactose. Lately, it's almost second nature to her. She walks
easily through the kitchen, picking up coconut milk, chocolate, nutmeg, cinnamon, and other
ingredients that she wouldn't know the name of if not for this specific thing. She was still learning
to cook without using any magic.

She's mixing the darker melted chocolate into the mixture and keeping it warm with a simple glyph
combo when her ears move with an intrusive sound.

To be honest she feels it more than hears it. The leaves move hard, the winds are violent, it rocks
the house in a very familiar way.

Her heart...Her heart seems to stop for a moment because years have passed, but she still
recognizes it. And when the voice comes. She knows she wasn't wrong.

She's a grown woman, isn't she? So why is it that when she hears her voice it sounds like she's 15
years old again?

Her fingers tremble around the porcelain and she sets it down on the table, afraid it will fall.

Mom.

It's her mother's voice.

Why? Why is she here? Does it really matter? It's your mother. Talk to her. You are no longer a
child. You don't need her to look at you constantly anymore.

She's your mother. You haven't seen her for longer than you can remember. You miss her. Lilith
takes a deep breath, trying to orchestrate her thoughts, but her legs carry her to the door before she
can really form a coherent one.

"I heard all about the petrification ceremony." That's the first thing she hears when she puts a foot
out of the house. She remembers that day pretty well. She remembers the fear of dying, not death
exactly, but...Dying without being able to redeem herself for anything. She remembers the other
fear that still chills her bones. The fear of losing Eda. She would rather someone kill her than have
to feel that again.

"Mother!" The word sounds strange on her tongue. After all this time, she still looks...Almost the
same. Mother has grayer hair now and her eyes have darkened a bit, looking more like one of her
own. But Gwendolyn Clawthorne still looked like the same woman, with a smile that matched
Eda's and eyes that reminded her of the person Lilith was. She's wearing an amulet with a strange
symbol, but mama has always been somewhat adventurous.

"Oh hi, sweet flea." Sweet flea. Oh. That's nostalgic. It's been years since she heard that. She smiles
at it. A single smile. After all this time. Does she notice the changes in her? The heterochromatic
eyes? The freckles all over her body? She's probably lost quite a bit of weight since she last saw
her mother. "Still dying your hair, I see. It's very sleek." The witch moves closer for just a brief
second, just a small touch on the smaller strands of her hair. It's only a delicate touch, but it seems
to make a lifetime since her mother last touched her. Because it probably does. It feels like a
lifetime since the last time she had a chance to see or hear her mother. She almost closes her eyes
with that single touch. "Now give me a moment with Edalyn, dear. It's important." Lilith opened
her mouth in pure reflex, but...Nothing came out.

Don't feel that. No. You are a grown woman. You are a grown woman, a grown woman who
cursed her own sister. You can't demand more of her, you just don't have the right to do that.

That doesn't stop her stomach from sinking, her eyes itching. She pulls away, wrapping her arms
around herself, perhaps trying to keep this feeling from spreading. Her skin creeps with an icy
sensation that runs through her entire body. Tighten your arms, keep it inside you, you are no
longer a child begging for attention. Eda. Eda deserves better.

Eda deserves this family. You don't. You are only here because she had compassion for you. Don't
be like that. Don't be that stupid, spoiled child again. This all happened simply because you were
like that.

When will you stop? Will it never be enough?

"Hey, guys. Good morning." She tries to return to her more ordinary mood when you cross the
doorway with the hot chocolate in hand, giving her the brightest smile in appreciation. Lilith tries
to smile back, it comes out as a grimace.

She knows that the only reason you don't feel everything right away it's because you're still sleepy,
but as soon as you fully return to your body, you will. She can't let that happen. Not about that. It's
childish, it's stupid. She doesn't want you to see that side of her. It would be better if you only knew
the problems with the parents, no more than that.

It's not fair to you.

"I shall be curing your curse!" It's Gwendolyn's exclamation that makes all eyes turn to her.
Including yours. Lilith watches your face, she watches you raise your eyebrows in confusion,
noticing the obvious resemblance in the woman present there, and then your eyes go to her.

But before you have a chance to ask, Eda's response diverts your attention.

"No, thanks." A chorus of "Whats?" arises, coming from, Luz, Hooty, and you. Lilith dare not open
her mouth once more. Not again.

"I said, 'No, thanks'." Repeated Eda simply, while shrugging. Yes, it hurts. It hurts how indifferent
Eda is. Because she didn't need mother to look at her. She never needed it and it's not the least bit
different now. Lilith wanted to be like her. Eda was so extensively better than her at everything. "I
got my elixir system. I'm good." There's a sour taste in her mouth, but she can't tell if it's leftover
from the elixir...Or everything.

"But... But who knows what they put in those nasty concoctions?" The matriarch of the
Clawthorne family proceeds, her eyebrows raised in complete disbelief. Luz nods her head in
agreement and Lilith feels your eyes upon her incisively. You haven't asked anything yet, the bond
is in complete silence. She wonders if it's due to the fact you have already sensed how petty she is
wanting to behave now.

"Actually, I do." Eda said with her tongue dripping sarcasm. "And... Would you look at the time?"
She pretends to look at a wristwatch before simply sitting mother on her staff. "I got a lot to do
today. So sad to see you go. Okay, bye!" She hits a resounding slap on the tip of the staff, causing
the wings to spread and then the eagle ascends into the sky.

Everyone looks quite indignant. Lilith. Lilith doesn't know what to feel. She...For the first time in a
long time, she feels like she is floating in that cloud of emotions that was being in the emperor's
coven. She doesn't know what to feel. She doesn't know how she should behave and it scares
her...Quite a lot.

"I'd kill to see my mom right now, and you just launch yours into the sky?" Luz's voice is
particularly shrill, but Lilith doesn't pay attention. She doesn't think she is paying attention to
anything. That's lethargy.

"Oh, listen, she comes around every year, toting a new cure for my curse, but they never work."
Every.

Every year? She watches Eda entering the house and the word seems to echo inside her. Every.

Every year.

No. Don't start with that.

You don't have the right.

But if mother had appeared once every two years, or three? Maybe four years? Would it have made
things easier when she could barely look in the mirror? Would it have made her less hateful? No.
Lift your head, don't cry. This is not the time to cry, even if your eyes water. Even if your heart
squeezes until it feels like it's going to turn into a grape. You can't do this.

She didn't even ask if you were okay. How long has it been? 8? 10 years since you last saw her?
And she didn't even ask if... if you were okay.

She didn't even look at you.

"Lilith." She feels your touch, slightly hesitant on her shoulder. She has no idea how long she has
been staring at the spot in the sky where her mother disappeared. "Everything okay?" The right
answer? No. She's not okay. She thought her parents' lack of attention was kind of a Clawthorne
thing, they had to pay more attention to Eda because she was chaotic...And she was cursed.
But...Decades later. They still pretend they have only one daughter. It's still the same shit.

Stop it. It's not right. If you hadn't cursed your little sister in the first place, none of this would have
happened.

"Sure." She swallows hard to manage to say anything. She sees you frown and tilt your head, doubt
emanating so evidently. She knows you feel it. You know exactly what she is feeling. She can't
allow it now.

When the walls go up around her, she's not even fully aware.

She just needs...She just needs you not to see that side of her. You, a girl who was kicked out of
your home by your own parents, who probably never had the slightest bit of love within your own
home. You don't need to see this petty side of her that complains even with a...Loving mother. She
can't remember the last time she felt this bad.

You don't have to feel that way. You don't need to be around her now.

"I...I'll go see if Eda needs help with anything." That's a lame excuse. She just needed to get away
from it all for a second. For a second that was.

She wanted to not exist. For a damn second. For one damn second, she would like to stop thinking.

"Lilith..." But when the word tries to reach her, it hits and doesn't really touch her. She knows how
much she must have hurt you.

She hates herself a little more for that.

But now. Now she really needs to hide again. She really needs to not be here.

Fear makes her skin freeze. She doesn't want to hurt you. None of you.

That's why she needs to be alone. Before her poison sprays.

(...)

That. That almost tore you apart. Not the attitude, but the barrier. It was almost physical, your skin
froze when you felt the word simply float. It hurt, but it hurt inside. It sank into your stomach,
made the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end.

She pushed you away. Again. She...She went to lock herself away. Again. You try not to feel your
heart fall to pieces at this, but it's slightly impossible. Your eyes seem to fill with tears as you watch
her disappear into the house.

You knew that her relationship with her mother was, to say the least, complicated. But, you had
shitty parents as well, you could help. You wanted to help.

But, as always...She didn't want to. Even after everything. Would that ever change?

"Y/N!" You blink several times to push the tears away and then face Luz. It's a bit complicated and
you make her frown as she looks at you. You try not to grimace, silently asking what you could
help with. "Will you come with me, after Miss Clawthorne?" Your eyebrows pronounce and then
you realize that she is pointing to a spot in the forest. The woman had not gone away.

"Why do you want to go after her?" You think it sounded a little too harsh, but it was Lilith. She
would do that to you. You'd go into defensive mode when she got like that.

"She's trying to help. If she has some way to actually cure the curse we can't let it slip just because
Eda is too proud." She had a point there. If she really could cure the curse...Maybe she and Lilith
could establish some kind of connection again. It was a silly hope. But what wouldn't you do for
her?

And what other options did you really have? Staying in the Owl House, watching the weather
while Lilith didn't want to talk to you?

"Fine. Let's go." Luz raises her arms and you make your way toward the clearing, with quick steps,
really fearing that Miss Clawthorne would leave without you having the chance.

"MISS CLAWTHORNE!" Luz's shout makes the woman stop in place and turn around with
frowning eyebrows. She's strangely very similar to the two sisters, facially it's like looking at Eda,
but her eyes are exactly like Lilith's green eye. "Hi! I'm Luz. Eda's apprentice." She looks at you
then and a small smile forms on her mouth. "And this is Y/N, my apprentice." Miss Clawthorne
frowns slightly at that but doesn't interrupt. "We think what you're doing is so sweet. Eda can be
so... Eda sometimes." The lady smiles now. She doesn't seem bothered by the fact that you are
both humans, which is good.

"You may call me Gwen, my dears. But please don't blame Edalyn." She clings to her staff. An
eagle. You watch with interest. Owl, raven, eagle. The Clawthornes had something with birds. "It
was the curse that created the rift between us." Your tongue curls into your mouth to ask about
Lilith. Had she not even noticed that she was cursed too? Had she not even noticed the change in
her eyes? The white streak? Oh, this is worse than you thought.

"I understand. Right now, there's an actual rift between me and my mom in the Human Realm."
You feel for her. Luz's mother loves her and you can't imagine the pain she is feeling without any
word from her daughter.

You wonder if your parents at some point tried to look for you. Probably not.

"Human Realm? Hmm." Miss Clawthorne seems to ponder for a second as she looks at the two of
you. "My dear, I may know how to fix both our rifts." You frown, almost to the point of joining
your eyebrows together. The human world? "I've heard some information that may assist you on
your quest." She's smiling in a rather cheerful way now, but for some reason, you can't smile back.
Probably because of the lethargy you are feeling. "Help me cure Eda's curse and that information is
yours." You are about to add something. Why would she really need your help to cure Eda if she
already said she had the cure? And why would an adult make a bargain with a child?

"Yes, yes, yes!" Luz, on the other hand, doesn't seem too discouraged. Maybe it's just you. You
don't even think of the human world as home anymore. Home. That word doesn't belong where
you came from. "Where do we start?" She then adds, shifting her weight from one foot to the other.

"We'll be consulting someone very special." And when she touches the amulet she has on her
chest, it glows with a green light that you don't think is very safe.

But when Luz starts walking beside her and chattering, you follow her. Because you see no other
option. Going home now and feeling that barrier that almost ripped you in half is not an option.

You follow them. Not before you take one last look at the Owl House and pray to the Titan to take
care of her while you cannot.

(...)

Having ice cream of controversial origins with a demon in the middle of the day. Maybe this was
the new humiliating one for Lilith. For Titan's sake. Hooty had to tell them to stop. If Hooty
became the voice of reason then she was really in deep shit.

But she wanted to stay away and she succeeded. You, Eda, and Luz just disappeared. Which is
good. She says to herself as she takes another spoonful that seems to cloud her head even more.

It's good that you are far away and don't get a chance to see her like this. Especially you.

Family issues and night market ice cream do not get along well.

"If my dad doesn't care about me, why should I care about him?" Unfortunately, this is not how
things work. Children who are left out are always the ones who are so in need of care. She
observed this in Amity for a while, it was almost impossible not to make a self-projection. With
you, it was vastly harder to ignore.

That's another reason why she stayed with the emperor for so many years. She was so afraid of
leaving him and never having anyone again. Belos did several things that she would rather forget,
but he spent more time with her than her own parents. Which is kind of ironic. How ironic is it that
the dictator who tried to kill her and her sister, who tor...For years was more present in her life than
her parents?

Would it have been the least bit different?

You can't blame them. You can't. They shouldn't even have to look at you in the face after what
you did.

"Hmm? Well, I'm not going to him. He's gonna have to come to me." King proceeds, throwing his
stuffed animal across the room. He's furious. Lilith is similar. She knows she shouldn't...But that's
all she feels. She wishes she could have been the perfect daughter. She wanted so badly to impress
them. She wanted so much to give them pride and nothing was ever enough.

She was still second, even though she was first. She will always be...That.

"I have no mother." She mumbles, feeling the burden of the words weigh on her shoulders. She
really didn't have one. She can't remember the last time her mother spoke to her before today. She
didn't visit her. She didn't call. She didn't send a fucking letter. She didn't care. It was the same as
not having a mother.

A thin tear runs down one of her eyes, but she doesn't bother to wipe it away.

"Isn't that taking it a bit too far, Lulu?" Her eyes go to Hooty and it's touching how concerned he
looks. If she were still in her body, she would probably caress his head.

"It's not taking it far enough." King rebuts with his paw in a fist. "Go tell her that. Go on. She's
right outside." Lilith's eyebrows pronounce as she settles on the couch to look at the little demon.

"She is?" And her voice breaks halfway. She has no idea why.

"Yeah, I saw her go off with Luz and Y/N. I think they're gonna heal Eda's curse or whatever." She
hesitates for a moment when she hears your name. You were trying, even after she pushed you
away again. You were still trying. It hurts. Her chest tightens. All the pain she's been causing. All
the people she's been hurting. You. But indignation blisters it all away so easily. Resentment is
such an easy remedy for self-loathing. It doesn't stop her eyes from filling with tears, though.

Again?

"Mother paying attention to Edalyn, again." She says more to herself as a sneering smile begins to
appear in her mouth. It's always been like that. Why on earth did you think it would change? "I
mean, it's not like I care." And she tries to say it with conviction, but she thinks the way her voice
breaks is too obvious, even for a tube bird and a demon kid.

It's like being 15 all over again. Mother was traveling, looking for a cure. Papa had gone to the
Mandible, not exactly answering the letter she sent. She hadn't seen Eda for weeks, she didn't know
where she was. And she didn't have the right to ask her anything. Alone and standing in that hall
full of people with judgmental looks. No familiar faces, no one to guide her. Just judgment, just
people with very threatening expressions as that woman pressed the glove on her back.

She was a fucking child. She just wished someone had held her hand. That's all.

The tears fall more easily now.

"You got, uh... You got a little, uh... Hmm." She frowns when she realizes that King is pointing at
her face. She raises her hands, almost feeling what she would find. Feathers. Feathers sticking out
of her skin. Her eyes widen. Her chin trembles. She rises from the couch with enough force to push
it away and slam it against the wall.

From under the cushions, behind the pot, on the ceiling. Where? Where are they? Eda has
scattered hundreds of them everywhere. Where?

"Where are the elixirs?" She runs, her legs almost failing, her limbs no longer wanting to respond
to her pleas. She doesn't want to hurt anyone again. Please, not again. She can't take this anymore.

It hurts.

There are no elixirs in the kitchen cupboards, nor in Eda's room, even the ones in her trunk are
gone. Despair surges through her veins. No, not again. She tries to calm herself, to take a few deep
breaths, but the thought that there is nothing here to stop it...It only increases her agony.

It will consume her. Her lips quiver as hot tears trickle down harder.

She will hurt everyone again.

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt any of you.

When King and Hooty appear at the bedroom door, she wants to say that she's sorry. She wants to
say that she tried and failed. She wants to apologize if she hurt them.

However, she doesn't have time. It's extensively stronger than her. Everything. Her ghosts are
tougher than her. They pull her into them. They grab her hard enough to hurt, they are strands of
black dust that clamp deep, like claws, into her skin and drag hard. There is nothing here. There is
nothing but pain and anger and resentment. She doesn't want to. She tries.

But what comes out of her mouth is only a cry and everything turns black before her eyes. And
then...

She has no body left either.

(...)

You thought it was a shitty idea from the beginning. It didn't matter how shiny that cave was, or
that that guy with more than two arms had healed the creature that looked like a rat. It didn't
matter. You didn't think it was right to try to cure the curse by pulling it out, through high levels of
stress, as your...(Mother-in-law?) claimed was written in that book. It didn't seem right. This is not
any kind of traditional medicine, even for the boiling isles, it didn't seem right.

But she was older, right? She was wiser. She was their mother for the Titan's sake.

"Gwen, we tried freezing the curse out, we tried sweating the curse out, we even tried flying snakes
for some reason." The lady looks at you, skeptical, as you continue to speak. "I don't think this
stuff is working." Eda just flew over your heads and you don't think this was very productive,
considering that she was currently running from flying snakes and the curse was perfectly fine.

"Did Wortlop ever say where he learned this stuff?" Luz completed and from the look on her face
at you...You understand that she wasn't very confident either.

"Yes, I'm sending it right away." Gwendolyn said as she pressed a button on a phone that was a
bird and it flew away. Your eyebrows frowned again, your intuition sounding throughout your
whole body now.

"What did you just do?" Luz murmurs with slightly narrowed eyes. You can already sense where
this is going. Nobody charges to heal people if they are not licensed doctors. That's one of the basic
things you learn in school.

"It turns out the ancient tome is only the first of a series." You look at Luz and she looks at you.
You both raise your eyebrows in the same way. "So I'm trading in a few paltry family heirlooms to
get the rest." Gwendolyn says as she hands a bag with more jewelry than you've ever seen in your
entire life to a bird that immediately takes off flying.

"Let me see that book." And you're not asking. You want to see what the hell is written there. A
certain indignation bubbling up the lethargy you've stopped feeling for a while.

"Halt." She pushes the book away from your hands and you feel your jaw lock, hard as a piece of
metal. "Only people who have scaled Wortlop's 'Pyramid of Study' can touch the tome." You roll
your eyes before Luz uses a root spell to throw the book directly into your hands. "Hey!"
Gwendolyn complains in an alarmed tone. But you and Luz are already going through the pages.
Every one of your previous misgivings is confirmed.

"Jar of bees for existential dread?" You mutter, hardly believing your own words.

"Aromatherapy for broken legs?" Luz adds, raising her eyes in alarm at the woman. You remember
her saying that her mother was a veterinarian. If you were outraged by that, how should it be for a
doctor's daughter?

"Gwen, you're being scammed. Wortlop is the worst kind of fake I've ever seen." But you can see
the denial on her face as soon as the words come out of her mouth. She...She truly believes in that
crap.

"You really think I'd spend my life savings on a fake?" Your immediate response is "yes". Yes, you
would spend your life savings on a book that isn't going to help anything because apparently your
censorious ability only... But you shut your mouth. Letting Luz do the talking, she has more
finesse. She has more patience than you do at the moment, and you don't think that being rude like
this to your mother-in-law is going to be very good for the future.

"I know you want what's best for Eda, and so do I." There was no cure. That disappoints you a
little. You certainly wanted to give this cure to Lilith if it were possible. But if it isn't. It doesn't
matter. Giant claws and all. Always. "But I'm calling this off." Luz pulls an elixir from the fanny
pack she was carrying around her waist and starts down the path to get down from the tree. You
intend to follow her before you let out all the swear words that are in your head at this very
moment.

"Luz, I really thought we were on the same side." And when she grabs Luz's arm, pulling the elixir
from her hands, you already have a fire glyph between your fingers. You normally had some in
your pockets. And you've never thought you would have to use it against a family member, but you
certainly will if she wants you to. "According to Wortlop, poison like this is made by healers and
potion makers who simply want money." You again glance at each other before looking again at
the Clawthorne's matriarch. How could she be the mother of the most intelligent woman you have
ever met? What kind of mist is that around her?

The book floats up to show you an image that shows a witch poisoning herself with the elixir. Oh
my Titan. She's an anti-vaxxer. Your mother-in-law is an anti-vaxxer.
"You have to be fucking kidding me." You barely notice as the curse comes out of your mouth and
Luz raises her eyebrows at you, but there is a smile at the corner of her mouth that says she loved
it. Oh, Eda is going to kill you.

"You just give..." Luz looks as much on the verge of collapse as you do. She sighs deeply and
touches her forehead with her fingertips. "Whatever. I'll just get more at the house." She barely has
time to say those words before Gwendolyn smiles too broadly.

"I'm afraid that will be a waste of your time." The eagle scraps past your ear before dropping a
wide bag in front of you that reveals...A lot of...Elixirs. No.

She didn't fucking do that. Your breathing changes pace. Your face heats up in a rather obvious
outrage.

She...Did she leave Lilith alone without elixirs? Lilith who was currently fighting with herself over
her feelings? What if...What if she needed it?

"Hawksley cleared out every bottle hours ago." She seems so happy about it. You press the glyph,
fire rushing through your fingers. You don't give a damn if she is Lilith and Eda's mother. You will
take those elixirs for better or for worse. If Lilith needs them if Eda needs them. There's nothing to
discuss.

"Why would you do that?" Luz folds her fingers into fists, looking worriedly at you. You don't
remember looking so out of sorts in her eyes. She is right to be worried. Your teeth are grinding,
your breathing is changing. You try to look for Lilith through the bond, but your concentration
cannot focus to communicate.

"Because I am a mother who will do anything for her daughter." Your teeth grind a little more, you
feel like you are almost growling. Anything but talking to them. Or noticing them. Or. You don't
have time to complete the thought. Because Luz literally leaps at Gwendolyn and there is a huge
crash as they both fall from the branch of the tree.

Your eyes widen and your heart races. But there is no sound of bones breaking, only of glass. The
elixirs are gone. You put out the fire on a leaf and climb down the tree as fast as you can, being
able to hear the exalted voices below.

"You weren't healing me. You nearly killed me!" Eda's eyes are flickering as she looks at Luz and
her mother and when she looks at you soon after. She shakes her head negatively in pure
disappointment, the feathers increasing around her hair and limbs.

"Eda, please try to stay calm." You sense in the air that this was completely the wrong moment to
ask her to stay calm.

"Why? Why should I be calm?" She almost smiles wryly, as Eda normally would, but her eyes turn
black when she blinks, much larger, and a huge shiver runs through your skin. "I have a right to be
upset!" And her voice doesn't sound like her. It sounds more like a parrot and a demon at the same
time. It's terrifying. It's very terrifying. And when she lowers her arms, it's wings coming up, head
triples in size, feathers and more silver feathers, claws, and teeth too sharp. Black, non-human
eyes.

And that is the owl beast. The raven one was vastly bigger, but that doesn't stop your limbs from
getting jelly-like consistency from seeing her.

"Let's get out of here. Now!" You say too quickly, while Eda is still stunned. Eda is not Lilith.
She's not going to court you, she's going to rip your liver out.

"No need to worry, dear. According to this we just have to... Uh..." Gwen flips through her helpful
book. Eda's approaching, she's smaller than Lilith's form but still big enough to swallow a hand at
once Uh.

"Have to what?" Luz's voice sounds quite shrill now. It's desperation.

"Buy the next volume." You almost curse again. But Eda screeched, too loud. You almost had to
put your hands to your ears. And then something stabbed you in the foot. You jumped on the spot
in time for King to pull his horn from your shoe. He had just fallen from a bush in front of you,
screaming at almost the same cadence as Eda.

Too many things happening at the same time. You feel extremely disturbed.

"So Lilith was feeling stressed and, uh, the light glyph didn't really work. So...uh..." You don't even
need him to say anything else. You know what comes next. And you want to punch your mother-
in-law in the face right now, so bad.

But Lilith's shrill squeal doesn't let you think straight. The black shape flies through the trees with
a ferocity that few things could have.

Your heart sinks in your chest. She was so on the verge of collapse. You should have insisted. You
should have tried a little harder.

You should have stayed with her.

When she lands, her claws scrape the ground. She looks even bigger than she did that night, maybe
because it was so dark then, but she's easily three times Eda's size. And they are both so furious.
This is not going to end well.

"Sweet flea?" You roll your eyes at your mother-in-law. That's not going to help. When Lilith
starts running toward Eda, fangs bared, it's you who runs toward her. You don't really think about
what you are doing. She could hurt Eda, a lot, but she's still Lilith. You still feel her. If there is any
way to stop the disaster. You couldn't care less about what happens to you.

You wedge yourself between the two beasts that could tear you to pieces.

"LILITH!" The bond is there, you know it's her because the thread ends in her. But the other
end...The other end seems to be covered in a dark mass of feelings that you can't identify. She's so
lost inside her own head. She hardly knows what to feel. And she keeps running. Her claws tearing
up dirt everywhere they go, with only one objective, her sister. "LITH! YOU HAVE TO STOP!"
You scream at her, you scream in the bond. Stop. For the Titan's sake, stop. Because this isn't you.

This is not you.

This is not my Lilith.

That's the curse talking, be stronger than that. Don't hurt Eda. Don't hurt yourself.

"Y/N! GET OUT!" She won't hurt you. You know she won't. She would never hurt you, right? She
would never do that.

Yet her claws rise up, huge. They glow golden in the setting sun. And the fangs look very
promising. She truly scared the life out of you. You feel a thrust from the ground, your body is
thrown upwards, and a stabbing pain spreads down your right arm. Blood trickles down as your
body slams hard against the ground on the other side.

Luz used a root spell. If not for that, it would have been your chest probably.

Uh. It was a nasty cut and it's throbbing like hell, causing hot tears to pool in your eyes. But you
don't blame her. You're the stupid one.

You had to try.

You watch as the winged creature that is also your girlfriend picks up her sister as if she were a
little keychain and flies away. Just like that. One last loud squeal in the air.

"Y/N!" Luz shouts, coming at you in almost the next second. She pulls a piece of fabric from her
fanny pack with ease, tying it around the wonderful new cut you have on your biceps. "That was
extremely stupid!" She scolds as if you were the child.

"I had to try." For her. You always do really stupid things for her. Standing in front of her in bestial
form and trying to chat is just one of them.

"That was my little sweet flea. That means she's also..." Yes. She's also cursed. Gwen's expressions
drop. She...She finally gets it.

"Cursed, yes. Were you not paying any attention to her?" King didn't spare the words you had been
thinking all along. She was so focused on trying to heal Eda that she didn't notice anything
regarding Lilith.

"I'm going after them." Luz said as she picked Owlbert up. You immediately try to stand, your face
contorting with the pain spreading through your arm, it's hot, scalding, and seems to make your
skin curl. "You stay." She points at you and it's almost impossible not to roll your eyes.

"I'm not leaving my girlfriend alone, Luz." Gwen's eyes widen even more.

"Girlfriend?" Well, about that you don't blame her for, she hadn't seen that much yet.

"You won't be able to hold a staff with that arm, you stay." You open your mouth again, ready to
argue, but Luz won't give you room. "Are you coming Gwen?" She asks then, which makes you
widen your eyes in indignation.

"This... This must be part of the process, right?" You don't know if it's the pain of the recently
opened cut, but you feel a twinge in your heart. She wants to believe so badly, doesn't she?

"I can see you still need a little time." King climbs on Owlbert and you barely have time to hold the
end of the staff before Luz takes flight. You can't believe they left you behind because of a crappy
biceps injury.

As if you're just going to sit around in this damn clearing while your girlfriend is in need of all the
support in the world.

You turn toward where you know the Owl House was. You wouldn't give up. You don't know if it
would work. But you wouldn't leave her.

Never.

You sigh, getting your brain some oxygen, trying to get used to the pain spreading through your
member. And then you beg the Titan to make it work.

"RIVEN! RIVEN COME TO ME!" Your scream echoes through the trees echoes through the
clearing, it sounds as desperate as you really are. You are not confident, but when the sound of
something cutting through the air comes closer you almost let tears of relief and a little pain come
out. You make a great effort to ignore the pain in your arm and stand up.

Riven is coming flying in, with...With your case wrapped around his head? Your eyebrows furrow
until you realize that this is a great idea. Oh, he took after his mom.

The bird lands and you immediately catch him up. You have never flown by yourself before, and
thinking about it now you should have asked Luz or Lilith for some lessons. But it doesn't matter.
You slip the case around your chest with your good arm and ride the staff. She's more important
than your questionable skills in riding a staff.

"This can't be right." Gwen is still staring at nothing, her hand holding the amulet tightly.

Your anger fades to a slight resentment. She is not a bad person.

She just refused to see...For so long. You take a deep breath.

"Listen, Gwen...I know you tried." Her eyes move to you and you again are taken aback by the
intensity of another Clawthorne's eyes. "I wish I had parents who at least tried." And you are not
lying. Not really. "But they don't need healing, they need you to see them. I want your daughter,
claws and all, and I'm just a human girl who shouldn't even be here in the first place. It would be
nice if you did the same." It sounded good in your head. Her eyes look so much like Lilith's when
they are filled with tears like that. You hoped she would understand. That she would finally see
what she had lost from her daughters.

But now you really needed to go.

"Let's fly, Riven." You tighten your fingers tightly around the staff before the white raven rises and
takes off into the sky.

(...)

"You know this is all your fault, don't you?" Lilith crawls. She tries to pull away. She tries
desperately to get out of it. She's so exhausted. She's so tired of running. "Little Miss Perfect." The
thing taunts as it laughs. She hears the claws scratching the ground, the recognizable sound of too
heavy paws hitting the ground. "Look at you!" She knows that. She doesn't need anyone else to say
it.

She shrinks away. Leave me alone. I know...I know I'm worthless. Just leave me alone.

Haven't I given enough already?

"It won't be enough until you're left with nothing." She watches. She watches her surroundings
change. She's there. She knows it.

She would never forget it.

The huge heart is beating. The ground at her feet feels extremely rough. Not again. Not again.

"You have failed. Again." Vomit builds up in her throat when she hears his voice. Yeah. She has
failed. That's pretty much all she's done since the moment she stopped wearing diapers. "Look at
me when I talk to you!" And a hand that isn't exactly there makes her chin rise, featureless, no
human nor witch blue eyes stare at her, from behind a horned mask made of gold.

She remembers the first time she saw that look. She was a child and could not sleep for a whole
month, because she swore those eyes were in her room. She's not 15 anymore, but she's still scary.
Extremely terrified.

Don't cry. Don't show weakness. You know what happens. You have experienced what happens.

But she's not the same woman who once knelt before that throne, she doesn't know how to put on
that mask anymore.

"I'm sorry." And it comes out as a broken and rather pathetic whisper.

Belos growls. The ground shakes.

Lilith closes her eyes and cringes hard.

She just needs to wake up.

(...)

The sky is in a yellow hue that reminds you a lot of gold. But the landscape is not your focus.

Your heart is beating hard, your breathing is getting more and more labored. It's easy to see them as
Riven flies. It's easier to fly when you are not a passenger too. Your fingers are white around the
stick with the force you are applicating, but you focus. Lilith. Eda. You need to help them.

You must use your questionable abilities to bring the Clawthorne sisters back.

There is a particularly tall building in the center of the city. You lead Riven there.

They are destroying some of the lower buildings while tearing into a mixture of claws, squeals and
growls that makes the people around them scream and run in terror. A black, gray mass.

You get out from Riven. He stops beside you, as if waiting for your next order.

"LILITH! EDA!" Your throat complains for another rather desperate cry. They won't listen to you.
You don't know why they would listen while they are killing each other, fangs and claws. So you
rip the case off your shoulder. The arm complains, you ignore it. You pull the les paul and wrap it
around your neck. Music to play spells, spells that were based on the melody. Okay.

Music. You need music. And you need them to open your eyes.

The chords come out of your fingers. A purplish-red mist takes over the ground around your feet,
leaves a warm feeling on the way, and spreads, more and more. The feeling's soothing. That's what
they need.

"All this feels strange and untrue and I won't waste a minute without you." Your voice seems to
add to the mist, makes her more powerful, more steady. It moves forward, whips of reddish magic
chasing, searching. You are not exactly paying attention to the people below, but there is the vague
impression that they are stopping running. The mist hasn't yet reached the two huge bodies
fighting in the middle of the houses, you play with more impetus. "My bones ache, my skin feels
cold and I'm getting so tired and so old." You're stronger than this, I know you are. "The anger
swells in my guts and I won't feel these slices and cuts." The rhythm is increasing, and so does the
mist. "I want so much to open your eyes 'Cause I need you to look into mine." It finds Eda first, and
you can feel through the instrument when it really hits her. She stops for a moment, before Lilith
grits her teeth and tries to attack her again. Luz flies past you and she seems genuinely amazed by
the magic around her, enough not to comment on the fact that you are there.

They spin around and burst through another building.

"Tell me that you'll open your eyes." Come on, Lilith. Come back to me. You have to come back to
me.

(...)

Blood drips and seems to glow in a strange green as it falls on the extremely clean floor of the
throne room.

Blood. The metallic taste in her mouth seems horrible enough to make her want to vomit. But she
deserves that, doesn't she? She has failed.

As she always does. She is a disaster at everything she tries to do. She doesn't even know why the
emperor tolerates her transgressions one after another.

But he was never a merciful man. She has always known that.

"You could end this faster, Lilith." His voice sounds like claws dragging across the floor. He's
prowling around her. She can feel this creature of massive height surrounding her like a cornered
child. She can't use magic, she can't fight back. She deserves it. Did she think she could make up
for everything with a childish spell and some nicer words?

No she couldn't.

"Just accept it. Accept that you can't. Accept that you are weak. Accept that you belong to me
because you have no one else. You are as horrible as I am." Was he lying? Why would Emperor
Belos lie to her?

He had hundreds and he still chose her. But if he chose her...Why was it always like this?

She spits out the blood, but the taste doesn't go away.

In another life. In another life she would have done so many things differently. She wishes she'd
had another chance. She sure did a lot of shit. She's certainly not the best person in the world. She's
no angel.

She wouldn't have cursed her little sister. She wouldn't have joined the Coven and been
contaminated by those people who slowly erased everything she was. She would have been better.
She would have been better for all of you.

But she tries to be better, doesn't she? She's trying so hard. That has to be something, right? That
has to be worth something.

She wakes up every day and she wants to be better. She wants to be someone who deserves...The
family that she has.

What she feels. What she is building around her new family, that has to be worth something. You
are important. All of you. You accepted her.
She... She doesn't need that anymore. She doesn't need envy, resentment, blood and blue eyes
anymore. She doesn't need that validation that has consumed her from the inside out for years.

She will never go back to that. She will never again let anyone cut her skin or anyone she loves.

"ADMIT IT!" And when those blue eyes without any trace of kindness appear before hers, she still
feels fear. She is still terrified, and all the newly opened wounds hurt like hell itself. But she
doesn't stutter.

She doesn't hesitate when she says just two words.

"Not today."

And that's when she hears music.

(...)

"Every minute from this minute now." Your fingers are trembling as the owl beast grabs Lilith with
what appears to have been an arm wrench and then falls before you. Only then you noticed the
eyes. They are Eda's eyes on that monstrous face. It makes you smile a little, golden, your heart
rate slowing a little now that you were sure it was working. "Hey, Eda." She gives you what you
think might be a smile, full of fangs, holding her sister down. Mist covers the raven beast's face as
she struggles under the owl lady's grip. "We can do what we like anywhere." And now...You
actually sing to her. The black mass around the bond still seems quite firm, but you will not stop.
It's her. You would play until your fingers turn to ashes for her. "I want so much to open your eyes
'Cause I need you to look into mine." The song seemed to make sense. You need her back. You
need her to look into your eyes so you can tell her...That things aren't so bad. "Tell me that you'll
open your eyes." The beast stops struggling. But you're not sure what exactly caused it.

Because when you turn your face, just for a brief moment, you notice Gwendolyn.

"I should've listened to you." Her voice is shaky as she approaches the two beasts who are actually
her daughters. You don't sing anymore. Your fingers slow down the chords, because you feel that
they will no longer be needed. "I know now why you pushed me away." She touches Eda's face
with one hand, without any uncertainty and you take a deep breath, feeling that this was finally
coming to an end. Your eyes fix on Lilith, though. "I made you think your curse was something to
be ashamed of." She is not a bad person. That's what you think as she rests her forehead against
Eda's. Not really. "Whether we want it or not, it's a part of you. And I love every part of you."
Your eyes fill with tears, too quickly, too hard to control. It would have been nice. That's what you
think. It would have been nice if they had at least tried. "And Lilith..." You shake your head, trying
to chase away the tears that have accumulated. Them. They are the focus here, not you. "You were
always so self-sufficient." You can imagine a younger Lilith, independent, outstanding, always
trying to impress. You wish you could have hugged that little girl and told her she was enough.
"But I didn't give you the attention you deserved." And when Gwen takes Lilith's face in her hands,
tears are glowing in the raven beast's black eyes. She's crying. Thin tears fall from your eyes in the
same way. "Shh." Gwen whispers then, wiping away the tears with her thumbs. "NOW!" The shout
makes you jump in place. Luz flies with Owlbert, a bottle of golden elixir gleaming between her
fingers. The first target is Eda and then...Lilith.

You can only stand back in pure delight and dazzle when both of their eyes turn golden.

Mist, magic and golden light seem to blend before your eyes as they envelop the two sisters.
Following them into the air, surrounding them and then...Transforming them back. The image of a
giant bird expanding into the sky as the curse disappeared and brought back the Clawthorne sisters.
It looked like that scene from Lord of the Rings that you always thought was so cool. This is
beautiful.

You were about to grab Riven to stop them from falling straight to the ground. But...They just go
down in the air, float, as if they were flying, and then Gwendolyn picks them up in her arms, as if
they were still two little girls.

They were fine now. Their mother was there for them. The bond is clean and all you feel through
her is relief. She's so relieved to be back that the tears that fall from her eyes are completely
understandable.

"She was trying to do her best, huh?" King whispered then to you and Luz and you smiled with the
corner of your mouth, but it probably came out a little sadder than you intended.

Yes. She really was trying her best.

Maybe that is the standard for a good parental figure. Not being the best, but trying your best.

You sigh and the pain in your arm clouds your head enough for you to forget about it. Thinking
about it now would be of no benefit.

(...)

Luz makes a very specific bandage on your arm while Lilith and her mother are talking outside.
You imagine that she is telling her everything, from the slight tension you feel through the bond,
but it didn't seem to be going that bad. It's a modest tension, enough to keep you from worrying,
nothing like the incommunicable dark mass that takes over when the curse takes hold. Nothing is
as terrifying as that.

"It will heal in a few days...If you don't do anything stupid again." Luz said as she tightened the
bandage a little tighter than really necessary. You chuckled softly and nodded.

"Okay captain." You jokingly salute and Luz narrows her eyes at you before letting out a very
motherly smile in your direction. She left you alone right after. You, your thoughts and an empty
room.

It had been a long day and you couldn't wait to curl up in that nest and forget that there was a world
out there. The Titan knows you need a good night's sleep. So does Lilith. So does Eda. In fact,
everyone at the Owl House needed a few hours of sleep after all that had happened.

You sit on the edge of the nest and take a deep breath.

There is a great feeling of completeness now.

You believe that Gwen is finally going to communicate better with her daughters. She will finally
see them for who they are. And this relieves you. It relieves you that Lilith and Eda don't have to
deal with shitty parents, they've been through so much already.

And when you close your eyes, it's like the whole world takes one long breath.

The calm before the storm. You don't want to think about it, you don't want to think about how this
day seems just too simple. Okay, you've had an emotional roller coaster, you've had an awful cut,
reconciliations have been made. But...It sounds too simple. Or maybe it's you who is being a big
fan of literature.
It ended well. That's what you tell yourself. That's enough for now. It ended well.

You don't need to open your eyes to feel when she enters the house again, when she comes up the
stairs, when she comes straight to you, without hesitation. A delicate smile takes over her lips
when you hear the doorknob turn.

She looks enthusiastic when she opens the bedroom door, there is a small smile on her lips, and her
eyes seem to sparkle. You remember thinking that she looks great dressed in black, considering it
brings out the color of her eyes as well as her skin. But this all disappears as soon as she lays her
eyes on you...More specifically on your bandaged arm. The spectrum glows in a dark shade as she
swallows hard. She was still going to blame herself for a while, and you would still have to try to
tell her every time that she was not herself and that you don't blame her for anything at all.

"With me, only words bleed, Lith." You whisper, a small smile tugging at your mouth with the
reference. She frowns as she closes the door, and you smile a little more before moving closer. "I'll
sing that one for you later." She twitches her lips for a moment, there is a slight anxiety now. You
sense that she wants to tell you something, something important.

You tilt your head gently toward her, stopping yourself from counting her freckles once more. She
knows she can tell you anything. She knows you would listen.

"I..." She cringes a little, looking down at her own feet. It's shame now. She's embarrassed. "I'm
sorry, for earlier." You compress your lips, as you swallow a little. Sure it hurt, but after all she's
been through during the day, you really didn't expect an apology for something she did.

She really cares a lot about how you feel...It's nice to know that someone cares that much.

And she didn't get down on her knees. That's good too. Never again.

"I should have stayed with you. I'm sorry too." She raises her eyes to you, her eyebrows slightly
pronounced. Doubt? Perhaps confusion. "What?" And there's a tiny smile wanting to rise on your
lips again because she was so adorable when she frowned like that.

"I don't think anyone ever said that to me." You wish you could have been able to hug that little
girl. You wish you could have been there when she was sinking into the Emperor's Coven. She
deserved someone who would have stayed. You wish you could take all her pain away with your
hand. Your eyes are watering again, so you blink them several times.

You know that you have been repressing a lot of of feelings during this single day. But now is not
exactly the time.

"I heard you." Your eyes rise and your heart seems to beat fast, particularly fast. Her lips are
contracted into a small smile that warms your whole body. She heard you. Even if she hadn't
become aware, she heard you. "The song was beautiful." And your smile must be exceptionally
silly because she reaches up to touch the tip of your nose with her finger. "Thank you, for always
trying..." Comfort. That's what you feel. That's what she passes on to you. Comfort. That's it.

But there is still something. She still wants to tell you something. That's what makes you look into
her eyes, lose yourself in their gleam as she tilts her head in a slightly guilty way in your direction.

She knows that you already know her too well.

"Hmm...Mother invited me to spend a few weeks with her." She says then, while moving her hands
to her back in an anxious gesture somewhat like a child would do. You frown just for a moment.
"Get back to my childhood home, developing our relationship, you know? Try not to freak out
every time she shows up." Now you understand the behavior. She's not saying she will. She's
asking your opinion. That's sweet.

"Do you want to go?" You ask as you move a few steps closer so you can look into her eyes
without her having to look down, silver and green, they look very unsure now, but also a little
excitement exudes from her. You already have the answer. She wants.

"I want to spend time with my mother and...Yes I haven't seen my father in years..." She begins as
she lets out a slightly frustrated sigh.

"But?" You raise an eyebrow and her eyes fix on you, you know why, you understand why.

"I don't want to leave Eda...Not when we are sisters again after so many years." She loves Eda so
much that she doesn't even need to tell you out loud for you to know perfectly well. Lilith
compresses her lips for a moment as she looks at you, she's waiting for your advice. It's almost
comical, considering that you're not exactly a role model with family relationships, but she wants to
know what you think. Again, it's really sweet.

"Well...It's only a few weeks, right?" She twists her lips next, as if pondering the same thing. "And
you can always call or write." You guys would have a serious problem with Hooty on that matter.
"I think you should go, it will do you good." And you really think so. Lilith's parents were one of
the big reasons she went down the path of the Emperor's Coven, it would be good for her to
reconcile with that part of her life and leave those who hurt her so incisively in the dust of her
shoes. She nods, but the slight frown does not leave her face when she looks at you again.

"So?" It's your turn to frown as a slight smile forms on her mouth.

"So what?" Lilith raises an eyebrow, as if it's perfectly obvious and you just frown even more.

"Will you come with me?" And when she asks that question, it's only at that moment that you truly
reason. It was so obvious to you that you would be with her, that you didn't think it implied that
you would go with her at first. Just, wherever she is, I am. It seemed so simple in your head that
just the possibility of her thinking that you would stay anywhere without your mate is a little
insane.

You don't even ponder it a second time.

"What do you think?" And a humored smile takes over your mouth when you say that. Any and all
of her insecurity seems to fade away when you do so. The anxiety is gone and only a relaxing
feeling takes over the bond when she smiles wide, teeth and all. Titan...You love that smile.

"I only have a single bed there." She moves one step closer and then there is no more distance. You
sigh at the closeness again and how good it is just to feel her. You love to smell her and feel her
warmth. It's so comforting to know that she is okay. It's comforting to know you've won. At least
today.

"I won't mind if you kick me in the middle of the night." Lilith rolls her eyes, but she's grinning as
she leans toward you. Just enough for you to reach her. Your fingers touch her shoulders first and
when your mouth touches hers.

It's peaceful.

It's pretty obvious that this isn't exactly a happily ever after. A let's be happy in my parents' country
house forever. No.
There are still wounds. There are still traumas. There is still a dictatorship in the world outside.

But In spite of the uneven odds beauty lifts from the earth.

And you find that even though things are still uncertain, when you cling to her shoulders, feeling
her hair on your fingertips, it doesn't seem so bad.

You will always go where she goes. Always. And you have to believe that you both against the
world has to be enough.

It will be enough. You tell yourself as you rest your chin on her shoulder, tightening your arms
around her.

It has to be enough.

(...)

Lilith Clawthorne was once an unbreakable woman.

She breaks now.

She is brittle, completely, the slightest scratch on those she cares about is like a tear in her heart.
The sharpest word, the hardest look, everything hits her so deeply that she thinks it might be
awkward to get used to.

But she doesn't care.

When she glimpses at Eda laughing and punching their mother in the shoulder. When Hooty clings
to her shoulder, refusing to leave throughout dinner. When Luz and King hand her a "Good luck in
the new house (which is actually old house)" card. When...When she sees you giggling at a very
bad joke Eda had told.

She doesn't mind that she is no longer the lady made of steel. Being brittle, also means being
malleable and she really likes the idea of being malleable.

She certainly has parts of her that she wants to protect you and everyone in the family with all her
strength.

But she is beginning to feel...That this is not the way.

She thinks...That maybe it's good to let her walls cave in.

For you.

Oh. You are beautiful under the dining table light. Like she've never seen.

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