Parents, it’s never okay

to hit your kids

.

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Hitting and other forms of harsh physical punishment is associated with mental health problems
later in life. Spamily
Research published this month in the journal Pediatrics confirms
what child advocates have long known: it’s never okay to hit
children.
Study author Tracie Afifi and her colleagues investigated the link
between children being hit, pushed and shoved, and the
development of psychological problems later in life. They found
that harsh physical punishment was associated with depression,
anxiety, substance abuse and personality disorders.

The findings are important because they challenge the belief that
there is a distinction between harsh physical punishment and child
abuse. They also support previous research linking the physical
punishment of children with harmful effects in childhood and
adulthood.

Outdated attitudes toward children

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Calls to ban the physical punishment of children inevitably meet
with arguments that parents should have the right to discipline
their children as they see fit without state interference. Such claims
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perpetuate perceptions of children as parents’ possessions without
rights to the dignity and respect afforded to adults in a civilised
society.

In the not-so-distant past, husbands claimed similar rights to

“discipline” and control their wives, and teachers found it difficult
to imagine how to control school children without resorting to the
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ruler, cane or strap.

Society has progressed – to a degree. Hitting intimate partners,

employees, infants in day care centres and school children is no
longer tolerated (except – incredibly - in some Western Australian
and Queensland schools). A husband, boss, child care worker or
teacher in most Australian schools cannot defend a charge of
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assault by arguing that they were just carrying out “reasonable

chastisement”.

Why then is it such a big step to remove this defence in cases where
a parent assaults his or her child? Why are small, vulnerable, and
impressionable children singled out as the only people who can
legally be hit?
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Children are more likely to respect parents who teach them constructive ways to behave. Flickr/courosa

The impact of physical punishment

Some adults argue that hitting children, euphemistically described
as “smacking”, is not violence. Yet children, whose voices have
historically been silenced, have described how smacking hurts
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them physically and emotionally.

Many children also experience discipline that does not hurt and
they want parents to know that alternatives to hitting are effective
and more respectful. As one 12 year old put it, “you shouldn’t hit
people… there’s a better way than hurting someone”.

There is increasingly strong evidence that parental physical

punishment may adversely affect children’s development into
adulthood. It has been associated with aggression, antisocial
behaviour, and mental health issues throughout life, along with a
heightened risk of abusing one’s children and intimate partners.
Researcher Tracie Afifi and her colleagues go so far as to argue that
“reducing physical punishment may help decrease the prevalence
of mental disorders in the general population”.
There are always alternatives to physical aggression in response to
challenging or annoying behaviours. Power relationships, anger,
frustration, and loss of self control frequently motivate violent
behaviour. Indeed, many parents admit that they resort to hitting
their children when they are tired, angry or distressed, and that
they later feel regret and remorse. Parents may even apologise to
their children.

Sadly, on too many occasions, physical punishment exceeds

even socially agreed limits. Children have been seriously injured
and even killed.

Positive parent-child relationships

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Most parents love their children and want to be the best parents
that they can be. Children are more likely to respect parents who
treat them with respect and teach them constructive ways to
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behave. Children thrive on positive recognition that motivates the
repetition of behaviours parents want to see, and also enhances
children’s self esteem.
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A ban on smacking would help educate parents about positive discipline. Malingering
Some parents hit their children believing that it’s reasonable and
acceptable. Often parents were physically punished as children,
and believe it did them no harm.

Until we question this myth, without judging such parents, we will

continue to deny children their rights. And we will continue to
instill fear, anger and resentment, and teach children aggression
and violence is a means of settling disputes.
It’s time to ban all physical punishment
As Marta Santos Pais, the Special Representative of the United
Nations Secretary-General on Violence against Children, recently
said, “Legislation provides an ethical and normative framework to
promote values of respect, tolerance and human rights.”

To date, all forms of physical punishment are banned in 32

countries, including New Zealand (since 2007). Sweden banned
physical punishment over 30 years ago. Other countries in
Scandinavia, Europe and Africa followed. Brazil is on the verge
of enacting a ban.

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Australia ratified the United Nations Convention on the Rights of
the Child in 1990. Yet, over 20 years later, Australian governments
have resisted adopting an enlightened, proactive stance on the
physical punishment of children. This reticence has been met
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with international criticism.

Banning all physical punishment would reflect governments’

unreserved commitment to promoting Australian children’s well-
being, positive sense of self, and protection from harm. A ban
would primarily serve to educate parents, and not to criminalise
them. Its aim would be to promote positive discipline and to grant
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children and adults equal protection from assault.

Contrary to some claims, countries that have already banned

physical punishment do not report a surge in criminal charges
against parents.

The way forward

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Few parents choose to act in ways that might unnecessarily risk

hurting or harming their children. But parenting is a huge
responsibility and parents need to be informed about positive,
constructive discipline. Such discipline sets up and consistently
reinforces the boundaries that all children need and expect.

Parents also need to be supported by governments, communities,

families and friends so that they can optimally nurture and enjoy
their children. Hitting children is never reasonable and can no
longer be justified.
 Vocabulary
 Outdated old-fashioned and therefore not as good or
as fashionable as something modern
ex: Nowadays this technique is completely outdated.

 Inevitably in a way that cannot be avoided

ex: Their arguments inevitably end in tears.

 Perpetuate to cause something to continue

ex: Increasing the supply of weapons will only perpetuate
the violence and anarchy.

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 Tolerate to accept behaviour and beliefs that are different
from your own, although you might not agree with
or approve of them
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ex: I will not tolerate that kind of behaviour in my class.

 Assault a violent attack

ex: UK The number of indecent assaults
has increased alarmingly over the past year.

 Chastisement a severe criticism or punishment

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ex: His bad behaviour invited chastisement.

 Euphemistically in a way that avoids saying

an unpleasant or offensive word by using a different word
or phrase
ex: The foreign fighters are euphemistically called "guests" .
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 Intimate a friend you know very well

ex: intimates of the star say that he has been upset by
the personal attacks on him that have appeared in
the press recently.

 Prevalence the fact that something is

very common or happens often
ex: The prevalence of the disease is higher in some families.

 Remorse a feeling of sadness and being sorry for

something you have done
ex: He felt no remorse for the murders he had committed.
 Instill to put a feeling, idea, or principle gradually into
someone's mind, so that it has a strong influence on the
way that person thinks or behaves
ex: It is part of a teacher's job to instill confidence in/into his or
her students.

 Resentment a feeling of anger because you have

been forced to accept something that you do not like
ex: He harbours a deep resentment against his parents for
his miserable childhood.

 Legislation a law or set of laws suggested by

a government and made official by a parliament

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ex: [ + to
The government has promised to introduce legislation to
infinitive ]
limit fuel emissions from cars.

something law LT
 Enact to put something into action, especially to make

ex: A package of economic sanctions is to be enacted against

the country.

 Ratify (especially of governments or organizations) to

make an agreement official
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ex: Many countries have now ratified the UN convention on
the rights of the child.

 Proactive taking action by causing change and not

only reacting to change when it happens
ex: Companies are going to have to be more proactive
about environmental management
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 Stance a way of thinking about

something, especially expressed in a publicly stated opinion
ex: The doctor's stance on the issue of abortion is well known.

 Reticence an unwillingness to do something or talk about

something, for example because you are nervous or
being careful
ex: His reticence about his past made them very suspicious.

 Surge a sudden and great increase

ex:An unexpected surge in electrical power caused the computer
to crash.