MARTYRDOM

It was not among the usual days, rather it was one of those days, which has all bunch of
surprises and shocks and are usually preceded by such omens. I don't recall the date, as
it was not important, but the incident of the family talk that day has an indelible marking
in my life. Long story short, I received my S.S.B. interviews call letter that day, upon which
my father responded with a sheer 'NO'. It was supported further by my mother, but
somehow I managed to convince them to let me go and try, at least for the first time. It
was a very straight matter, if I get selected in it, my family would have given it a thought,
otherwise that channel would have been closed forever. And to the best of my family, it
did close for ever since then.

I remember how I got encouraged for the Defenses. Initially, I was unaware and later
reluctant to serve in the same, but when my friends started taking interest in it, it
attracted me too. Upon several incidents of watching their valor, intelligence and
ventures, what once a mere attraction turned into a desire, a passion to raise the head in
pride, and to bow it only to the motherly figures and to those who served them since
time immemorial. My family, on the other hand, strongly believed that I should indulge
in family business and take it further. They were not wrong, but neither were they right
as in my case. Hence, that moment, when result was declared, I felt the so called ‘spine-
chilling’ feeling for the first time. Despite all my best efforts, I was rejected. Henceforth I
accepted my fate and started handling the family business thereafter.

It was after a period of nearly 7 long years, that some of my closest friends came to visit
me. We decided to go to the nearby club, to celebrate the occasion. We were at the peak
of our leisure that was all in the air, when out of nowhere, a fearsome sound came. As
I’ve studied about with guns and had known a lot of them, I quickly realized something
disastrous is happening outside. In a matter of seconds, the frequency of gun firing
aggrandized and what we saw was horrifying. A group of 3 people with age barely into
the 20s, with heavy black bag packs and tied grenades and AK-47 rifles on their hands
were mercilessly firing at the people all around. Their face was telling an ironical
expression; people of their age have a gleam while they had gloom, and were
relentlessly causing havoc upon the innocents.

The club where we had been had both the sitting arrangements on the ground as well as
the inter-connected first floor. What happened in a jiffy was surely a heinous act of
terrorism. Some of us at the top lied prone to the ground, but realizing that they would
surely come up, we along with some others who were there, started crawling towards the
staircase leading to the top of the club. There was a door on the latch, and as we
reached there slowly, we rushed to get inside. But as every moment passed, it turned
more into nail-biting one. A silence thereby approached us first. It was trembling and
then we heard someone saying,” Let us hit the people on the top” and all of a sudden we
heard the footsteps approaching. It was a nightmare more intensifying with time.

We were there at the other side of the door, and the door was closed, yet it was not a
safe. We all were quite aware about that. I realized sooner that it is the high time to react
to it. So I decided that I would stay near the side of the door while my friends would help
others to move to the corner of the terrace. The terrace was quite big with nearly 4 water
tanks, plus it was late evening, so we switched off all the lights to make it a complete
blackout. My friends insisted that they won’t risk my life, but I was adamant. I was feeling
the same spine-chilling thing once again after 7 years. I was having no clue what I would
do there, but surely I felt I had to do something. It was the peak of dreadfulness of all
the times combined.

They hit onto the door, probably with their feet and shouted to open it. I underwent a
thought, it was disturbing as if asking me why I have never made it to join defense.
Somewhere beneath all the excuses and lies was a reason truer and closer to the soul. It
instantly answered “because of your fear”. I was dumbstruck. Within this silence, came an
answer and I felt a sudden confidence, something calling out for me. It was a unique
feeling that boosted me, and I became ready. They broke open the door and came
inside, searching out for the innocent lambs to be slaughtered and moved forward, I
leaped from behind and released the safety-lever of the two grenades at once of the
terrorist entering last.

It was the happiest moment I ever felt in my life. I had done something bigger and better
than any future part of me would have ever done. I realized that inner calling ‘to serve
without fear’ and bravely faced the present with all might I had.

“The formal soldier inside me died that day, when it was refused to be called again. It
was a death to the soldier. This time, the informal soldier is called again to swap his
death for life called Martyrdom.”
-Penned by

कलम

(Manthan)