UMAGEZA .

𝑤𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑒𝑟 : 𝓼𝓷𝓮𝓮 𝓶𝓽𝓼𝓱𝓪𝓵𝓲 .

Introduction .

The taxi rank is always smelling , kuhlezi

kushunqa intuthu kunuka umchamo ,
ugwayi konke nenyama yenhloko .
I am at the taxi rank , I'm coming from
school , ngishiywe ibus lasemini . its
already 3 : 37pm & I am looking for a taxi
going home .

...........

I walk inside and take off my shoes .

mom : uvelaphi eksuku ntombi ?

me : sawbona nawe ma .

I close the door .

mom : ayibo ntombazane ! uphumaphi

ngo4 esoskole siphume ngo2 ?

me : ngshiwe ibhasi ma , bekwamele

ngigibele amataxi's etown-rank manje
bingafuni ukugcwala itaxi , xolo for
coming home late .

mom : eyantoni iphone? osafoni ngani

ungitshele , ngyafowna nephone
awuyibambi .

me : my battery died , I would've ...

mom : suka , suka la eduze kwami . nxx .

she clicks her tongue & continue's to talk

while I walked to my room .

I have no words to decribe ihhaba

likamama , she is the most dramatic
person in my whole family .
I live in a very loud town in Jozini . a
house with 7 rooms , I live with both my
mom & my grandma from my mother's
side . my grandma is xhosa , I'm half
xhosa and half zulu because my mom is
xhosa & dad was zulu ; my mom's name is
Zenathi Angelina Khumalo ( married -
Mtshali ) - 43yrs . & my grandma is Khanyi
Bettina Zungu ( married- Khumalo ) -
73yrs .

well , dad had passed away 3 years ago ,

by then I was 14 and in grade 8 & yet till
today ; I still wish he was here sometimes
, its been hard for my mom to raise me
alone .

I go to Masakhane Secondery School . I'm

17 years of age , in the 11th grade , I
would decribe myself as a very loud
young girl , tall in height , light in terms of
skin tone & also about size 28 in bodysize .
I have only 2 bestfriends . Kwanele(16) &
Buhle(17) & we all smoke (weed) but our
families don't know that . I have long
unplaited straight hair .
I'm Sne , Snezintombi Azenathi Mtshali &
this is my story of how I fell for umageza .

Insert 1 .

I'm coming back from school and its 4 : 22

pm . I just got yelled at by my mom in the
kitchen , on my way to my room I saw
ugogo by the living room .

me : sawbona gogo .

gogo : ewe sana lwami , bekunjani

eskoleni ?

me : school was fine . ndidikiwe kalokhu ,

I'm starting my exams in like a week .
gogo : thola umphumlo , uzawuvuka
sendikuphekele your favourite meal .

my grandma spoils me alot , like totally

different from what my mom is ; she has
this calm heart , loving and unesneke .

me : I will do just that , enkosi .

I walked to my room & closed the door . I

threw my bag on the floor and jumped to
bed , I the put my phone in the charger .

- 2 missed calls from Buhle .

- 21 messages from "BFFS".

[ group chat ]
Kwanele : guys mina I'm giving it to him .

Buhle : your virginity ?

Kwanele : yes guys , I mean we've been
together for like what ? 8 months now . I
think I'm ready mna ngoku , I mean ? its
just sex , nothing much .

Buhle : ukuphi uSne khona azokuzwa

ukhuluma lomsangano owushoyo .

Kwanele : look . * sent 2 photos *

Buhle : typing ....

Kwanele : *recording audio*

me : ayibo , Kwanele ! there is something

off about this guy . & hey I just got home ,
the taxi's took too long .

Buhle : we don't trust him .

ey atleast you got home safe .

Kwanele : voice note 1:13 .

........

" weSne wena ! " thats my mom calling me

all the way from the kitchen .

me : ma ?

mom : lezizitsha ? zizoywasha .

me : ngyeza . ngsakhumula i'uniform .

I told my girls I will be back , I wore my

jean short & a t-shirt .

Its still february & today was very hot .

I made my way to the kitchen and I found

my grandma busy with the dishes .

me : gogo ?
gogo : ntombiyami ( daughter )

me : I will do the dishes , please .

gogo : ay hambophumula , ubhale

umsebenzi weskole , ndizawzihlamba
izitsha .

she is such a sweeetheart nangumuntu , I

really hope she stays with us much longer
, I can't afford to lose her shem .

me : thank you so much . enkosi nyani .

I walked back to my room and I took my

earpods , I listened to music while still
chatting to my friends .

around 7 pm my mom cooked supper and

we sat together by the living room to say
grace & eat , after that we all went to our
rooms and slept .
the following day .

mom : ungangenzi ngize ngikvuse

ngempama .

yo , sekaqalile . Its 5 : 51 & I'm already late

, I have to be in school by 6 : 45 am .

I woke up and made my bed , took my

cosmetics & walked to the bathroom , I
took a very quick & cold bath , when I was
done I went to my room & decided to
wear school tracksuits today , suitfridays .
I feel like today is going to be a very long
day .

its 6 : 26 & I decided not to eat , so I tied

my hair neatly to the back & took my bag
.

me : bye gogo , I love you .

gogo : ufunde kakuhle sana lwami .

I went to my mom's room , naye she was

also late for work kodwa bekabusy
ethethisana nami .

me : cela imali yokugibela .

mom : I will take you to school & fetch you

again at 2 : 30pm sharp , I need you to go
with me to the mall afternoon , usudlile?

me : no .

mom : hambodla usheshe , mangiqeda la

ngyahamba mina .
the bus had already left me vele & my
school is a bit far , its about 30 - 40
minutes away from home .

I made cereal & ate while watching TV .

mom : asambeni .

my mom drives a black & white range

rover , I'd describe her as a very strict yet
bubbly person , a very independent
woman ; I look up to her . she has
dreadlocks , short in hight & a bit chubby
.

she drove me to school & I arrived ,

luckily the gate was not closed yet , I
made my way to the second chorido
where my class is , the school was so quiet
. it didn't sound nor look like a friday . I
walked inside class .

Buhle : why ulate ?

me & Buhle are deskmates cause we are
both in the same class & Kwanele is in a
different class (different subjects) but we
are in the same class for maths literacy .

me : I woke up late dawg , I'm even tired .

Buhle : but you wrote the english

homework right ?

me : what homework?

Buhle : english ? kodwake nami no , lets

ask for Amahle's book cause we have
english for the first period .

I knew very well that I'm already in

trouble because I've had 2 written
warnings from the english teacher (Mrs
Shandu) & if she sees that I didn't write
her homework again , I might even get
detention .

we borrowed Amahle's book ,

( smartest girl in class ) & we quickly
wrote the homework before the period
starts .

the bell rings .

Mrs Shandu : morning grade 11's .

"morning ma'am"

Mrs Shandu : did I give you homework?

"nooo , yesss , noo" the class replied . I

swear my classmates are the best shem ,
they always find a way to make my day .

.........

its break now , the bell rang ; we walked

to the tuckshop & we brought fried chips
& fatcookies ( amagwinya) . we went to
the stairs where me & my girls always sit .
we were eating while gossiping &
laughing .

Kwanele : sooooo , tommorow I'm going to

Tumelo's house .

Buhle : yooooo , suyaqala futhi .

me : girl , you sure you want to do this?

Kwanele : yes I'm sure , I really am .

Buhle : mina ngyakujudge.a shame , you

are 16 kokuqala & this guy is not worth it .

Kwanele : Sne , wena uthini?

me : angisho lutho mina , you know it

yourself what you want deep down &
wena Buhle , let her be ngoba the next
thing you are going to find yourself in the
same position & thina we won't be jugding
you .
I'm not always right ne? but I always give
the best advice to my friends , I'm always
there whenever they need to talk to
someone & nabo they know that .

Buhle : musa ukufaka omunye ehlathini ,

but let me just shut up .

Kwanele : thula vele ngoba awazi

ngikhuluma ngani , ngoba uyilento
oyiyona .

"uyilento oyiyona" meaning uBuhle is

lesbian , not lesbian but she dates girls
most of the time , she has never dated a
guy but has had a crush on one boy .

Buhle : soxabana Kwanele ,

uzungayqhathi nami ngyakucela .

me : okay woooa , lets relax , no need for

insults & judgemental statements .
umuntu akenza into ayithandayo , nabona
ukuthi iright for yena .

we continued talking until the bell rang

for us to go back to class , we walked to
our classes & it was now economics class .

economics has to be the best the subject , I

enjoy economics so much , I love it and
I'm always on 70 & 80 percents for it . I
understand the teacher & it all makes
sense to me , unlike the other subjects
shem .

...........

school was over & I was walking with

Kwanele to the gate , she was telling me
how excited she was about how she will
have sex for the first time , meanwhile
Buhle yena was in for detention .

my mom's car was parked by the school's

parking lot & I hugged kwanele .
me : byee , i will call you .

Kwanele : I love you friend .

I got inside the car , & greeted mom .

mom : how was school ?

me : it was normal , I'm starting exams in

a few days though . its alot of pressure .

mom : I know hey . grade 11 bunzima .

me : not only hard but draaaining .

mom : its still term 1 , usazokunyisa nje .

we broke a little laugh & we drove to the

mall , she actually wanted to buy some
food ( grocceries ) , we walked together
inside woolworths .
me : can you please also buy me a new
phonecase.

mom : remind me masizodlula

ngakulabantu abayithengisayo .

me : thank you .

we took bread ; drinks , apples ,

cheesepack , icecream etc & I got my new
phonecase & a screenprotector .

we had a mcdonalds drive thru & around

5pm we were on our way going home . it
was a very long day after all . I am so tired
.

a few days later .

Its a wednesday at 11am . I didn't go to
school today , I am a bit sick . I have
period pains . mom went to work & gogo
went to a meeting at church . I am alone
in this house & I'm starving . I called mom
& asked if she can bring me pizza when
she comes home & she just hung up on me
, right now I am making frenchtoast to eat
& drink with coffee so I can drink pills .

I check my phone & 0 messages since

everyone is at school .

I ate my toast , I boiled water & went to

bath . after that I was scrolling on
facebook , I think thats when I went back
to sleeping .

..................

Insert 2 .
Its monday , I am starting my exams today
. I woke up very early & ngifundile
kakhulu futhi , I must say .
I went to bath at 5am & made breakfast
for both mom & granny . I made them
fried eggs & bbq saurce with wors . I'm a
very good cook , its just that I never get
time to futhi ngyanqena too much . I
woke umama at 5 : 40 & she went to bath ,
after that , I packed my bag & walked to
the bus stop .

I got inside the bus & put my earpods on ...

while listening to ariana grande .

I got to school by 6 : 32 & made my way to

the toilet , a few grade 12's were there in
the toilet & I'm not in good space with
most girls in my school , most hate me
with no reasons to & some pretend to like
me or to be friends with me knowing
deep down that they don't like me , kodwa
sengajwayela , angsabanaki manje .
I walk inside the toilet & these matric girls
were smoking weed by the corner , the
smell of weed smells like everything is
going to be okay .
me : san'bona .
girl 1 : sho .
girl 2 : yafuna ukushaya ?
me : no thank you .
I said as I applied layers of lipgloss
looking at myself in the mirror .

girl 1 : why not?

me : I'm wearing my school uniform .
girl 2 : so ?

I just looked at them , smiled & walked to

my class . I am also a huge weed lover but
I have bounderies to never smoke in the
school premises & to never smoke in my
school uniform .

I got to class & Buhle was sitting with

someone else , I think its a new girl .

me : hey ? uhm ?
Buhle : Sne , this is Kayle Tewnes & she is
new in school , I think she could be our
new friend .

me : okay , I'm stressed about todays

exam & wena you are coming here with ...
yooo Buhle bakithi !

I walked outside the classroom & I went to

Kwanele's class .

me : girl , you will not believe .

Kwanele : intoni ? .
me : Buhle has a new bestfriend .
Kwanele : girl you lieeee !

we broke a really loud laugh , me &

Kwanele both love exaggerating things .

me : she is sitting with her new bestie in

my place by our desk .
Kwanele : its me & that new bestfriend
afterschool .
me : afterschool is afterschool !
we laughed again , I love Kwanele's vibe ,
like she is loud & funny . akandaba
nalutho .

& if you are wondering , she didn't give

Tumelo her v.card (virginity) but instead
asked him if he can wait for her until she
is fully ready & they are still together .

I walked back to class & the bell rang ,

now we all have to go to our exam rooms
,the whole school is moving & busy ,
walking up & down looking for their
exam rooms .

.........

its now breaktime & I was looking for my

friends since we were all placed in
different exams room .

" Snezi "

most of the people that know me call me
"Snezi" short for Snezintombi . I turned to
see who was calling me .

Aphile : hey .

Oh its Aphile , some girl in my class ; well

she is one of Buhle's ex girlfriends . me &
Aphile hardly talk because of how things
ended between her & Buhle .

me : unjani ?
Aphile : ngyaphila , ubhalekahle?
me : yes , kodwa futhi yabo some
questions were off & confusing . wena ?
Aphile : ngibhale kahle mina . can you
please do me a small favour .
me : yea ?
Aphile : okay don't laugh ne ?
me : okay .
Aphile : can you please help me fix things
with your friend Buhle .
I smiled .

Aphile : you said angeke uhleke .

me : ayibo angihleki nje Aphile , okay tell
me how you want me to help ?

Aphile : okwamanje can you just give give

me your number then we will talk .

I gave her my tens & I went looking for

friends . I found them sitting by the stairs
& eating popcorn .

Buhle : ubukuphi ?
me : I was looking for you guys .
Buhle : uqambelani amanga ?
me : oh bengikuphike ?
Buhle : I saw you talking to Aphile .

me : ohh yea I was , pho?

Buhle : ungazothi pho , you know how I

feel about leyantombazane & you
promised ukuthi you won't be friends
with her .

me : kokuqala I didn't promise anything &

secondly she is not my friend , we were
just talking nje .

Kwanele : nawe Buhle unedrama nje .

Buhle : Kwanele bengikhuluma nawe ?

me : weee nakhoke . okay Buhle

mnganami , ngyaxolisa kakhulu ngokuthi
bengikhuluma noAphile, ngyaxolisa
ngokungakuhloniphi . besacela sidlule?
Buhle : yea ngyakuxolela .
we gathered by the stairs again & went to
buy kota's and ate while talking .

me : uphi umnganakho omusha?

Buhle : ey ongyeke ngaloyo , uthi
akabhemi
me : manje mengabhemi?
me & Kwanele laughed at her .

Buhle : angfuni kuthiwa ufundiswe yithi .

Kwanele : sobhema nini?
me : anime kancane , how was the paper?
Kwanele : yooo uyaphi lapho ? inkinga
was question 3 , ey yabona nje .

Buhle : brooo beyinzima leyana .

me : ay its question 6 for me shame .

Buhle : mina lapho I left blank spaces .

Kwanele : ayibo bekukhona uquestion 6?

we all laughed , Kwanele is actually

careless , tholukuthi the question was
there ukuthi yena akaze ebheke .

kwanele : no guys ningahleki .

angbonanga question 6 mina .
Buhle : it was there though , about the
cartoon , that garfield one .

we continued talking & by 12 pm , school

was over . they usually take us out early if
we were writing on the first session . so
then I took a taxi to the mall , alone cause
Buhle's mom fetches her & kwanele lives
closer to the school , so its easy for her
cause she walks .

Insert 3 .
[ taxi rank ]
yoo omageza abalana abasangbuki kanje
manje ngathi bayaqala ukubona umuntu
omuhle ( I thought to my mind & had a
little laugh alone ) . yesses , manje
senghleka ngedwa bazocathi ngyahlanya .

me : sawbona bhuti .
taxi driver : yebo swithi .

weird .

me : uhm besacokbuza amataxi aya eB2 . (

thats where I live . B2 malwazi street )

taxi driver : ay swidathi ngena khona la.

me : okay thanks .

he keeps giving me eyes ; awu yazi

lomuntu wabantu bakithi .
ah shit , sekugcwele & sekusele the only
seat at the front . me sitting in the front
means I must calculate the money from
the passengers & maths is never on my
side , either way I got in & closed the door
. I greeted the people inside the taxi .
some replied , some didn't . the driver got
in & he started driving .

passenger : besacokbuza ? konje malini

ukugibela ?

taxi driver : R22 .

the noise that started when people were

complaining . well the driver was wrong ,
we all knew that it only costed R16 ,
manje the 6 rand that he is adding asiyazi
.

driver : onenkinga asho ngimehlise . R22

ukugibela , ukhona yini onenkinga ?
silence ...

imagine we in the middle of no where &

this idiot says that .

me : besacokwehla mina .

I only had R20 , I was short of R2 , I can

still walk back to the rank & atleast call
my mom or go to where she works ngoba
ay cha lodriver uyahlanya .

passengers : ay nathi siyehla bhuti .

taxi driver : okay manini , manini . asithi
R20 , ngiyamake lapho . ongafuni
angimncengi , akehle .

me : still , iyafana nje lento . ngyehla mina

.
he stopped & out of 16 people , only 3
people remained in the taxi .
................

its a very shushu ( hot ) sunday & I just

came back from church with gogo .
bekungemnandi ecaweni ngyakwazisa .
I'm catholic btw . I go to a saint martians
catholic church with both mom & granny ,
inkinga umama yena akasajwayele ukuya
ngoba she is always at work .

gogo : ngikhathele ngiyafa mntanami .

me : a cup of tea ?
gogo : ewe , enkosi .

I opened the curtains and the windows &

also boiled the kettle water . I made my
way to the bathroom , did my business &
took my phone out of the charger . i
checked up on Buhle after seeing her
missed calls ; uBuhle is always calling me .
you'd think its important kanti no , she
just wants me to be online & gossip with
her 24/7 .

[ chat ]
buhle : what are we writing tommorow?
girl ?? ukuphi kanti ?
sneeeeee !
me : hey luv . uhm we are writing maths ;
I was at church kanti wena don't you have
the timetable .

buhle : angisazi ngyibekephi , okay thanks

, yoooo church girl . who still goes to
church these days ?

me : I do .

i switched off my data & went to make

ugogo her tea .

gogo : enkosi , 2 spoons of sugar?

me : I made it exactly the way you like it .

I went to my room & got a random text

from a number I don't know .

[ chat ]

072 343 1121 : hey , its Aphile .

me : oh hey girl .
I saved her number & I really want for
her & Buhle to fix things , I will make sure
.

we texted for a while ngaze ngazumeka .

.........
the following day .

mom : ngizoze ngize namanzi abandayo

njalo wena ntombazane ! awuvuke .
mh mh mh ! mhhh . my mom yena she is
not only my alarm , she is also iscefeee
when it comes to waking me up .

I checked the time , its 5 : 06 . I decided to

sleep for atleast 2 minutes .

05 : 13 .

mom : ayibo !
she said while pulling my blanket & a jar
of cold water in her hand .
me : sengvukile , sengvukile .
mom : sukuma , ngfuna ukukbona
uyongena ebathroom .

I stood up very quickly & went to the

bathroom , I sat in the toilet seat for about
3 minutes trying to atleast rest my eyes &
she was banging the door .

mom : uyageza njalo lapho?

me : yes hhawu .
mom : angiwezwa amanzi ekhala ,
awakhale amanzi mawugeza ngoba
ngzosuke ngivule lomnyango .

ngivele ngiphathwe ikhanda mina uma

umama enza lento yakhe , iyangdina &
my body is tired angazi why .

I took a bath & got dressed . I was at on a

0% mood & I applied my lipgloss , said
goodbye to gogo & mom . after that I took
my energy drink by the fridge & walked to
the bus stop , walked very slowly while
drinking my drink .

I got to school .
I didn't even study/practise maths . I'm
really not serious with school .

teacher : your paper is 2 hours , no

borrowing , no talking , no copying . you
finish ; you raise up your hand . & your
time starts .... now .

ayibo . ayibo question 1 . askaze

sikfundeke lokhu .

Its only 5 minutes onto the exam & I look

to my leftside , the girl sitting by there is
crying , like silently but she is crying & its
so sad . my right side this guy yenake he is
sleeping . what is going on ?
I thought to myself .

I wrote the rubbish that I wrote & exam

was dismissed . I walked to the toilet to fix
myself & went to my friends .

Buhle : how was it oe ?

me : total bullshit .
Kwanele : oe . bekuyikaka marn leya .
me : most of the things that were there ;
we never learnt them in class . at all .
Buhle : questiooon 1 !
me : yeyyy laphoke ngivele ngahlanya .
mangithi ngyabuka eceleni nhla . omunye
ugirl was crying yena .

they both started laughing *

" yooooo "

Buhle : yo ngeke beynzima shem .

we continued talking , the afterschool bell

rang at 12pm & I couldn't wait for the bus
again so I went to the taxi rank .

[ taxi rank ]
these pervants are still looking at me in a
way that now I feel uncomfortable & a bit
unsafe . "ey mama , babygirl , swiri " was
what I was hearing the entire time .

me : san'bona . bengisacela ukubuza

amataxi aya e B2?
taxi driver : yiyo yona le mama .

I sat by the backseat where I was alone by

that time . earpods on & leaning by the
window while waiting for other
passengers to get in .

*qo qo*
someone knocks by the window that I was
leaning on .

argh . its one of these taxi drivers .

i looked at him .
me : ? *confused*
him : cela uvule iwindi ntokazi enhle
ngikhulume nawe .

I decided to ignore him & continued

chatting on my phone .

*qo qo*
I quickly lost my temper & opened the
window .

me : yea ?

him : igama nguMthobisi wakwa

Mthembu , kodwa inumber yakho
ingalenza iluqede usuku lwami , ngisacela
ukuba umngani wakho .

me : ngobani ?

him : ngoba umuhle .

me : what is me being pretty going to do
for our friendship ?

* he keeps quiet *
me : yea ne ?
I closed the window .

I text Buhle ....

[ chat ]
me : girl umageza !
Buhle : uyenzeni umageza ?
me : iscefe esilana erank yo .
Buhle : bayakushela ?
me : not really kodwa kuyela ngakhona .
Buhle : be safe love .

this guy gets inside the taxi & comes to sit

right next to me .

me : ayibo .
him : ntokazi .
me : yazi uyangcasula , besacela uphume
him : ngiphumelani ?

me : okay besacela ukudlulake mina .

him : ngicela igama lakho nje kuphela .
me : nguSne .
him : isbongo sona ?
me : Mtshali .
him : oh hlabangane , galela (clan names)
me : yea .

him : cha khona uyayitshela

sengyakubona , kodwa anginankinga .
umuntu umthanda , umthanda nend...

me : whuu ah . *Iaughs*
him : cela ungiphe inumber yakho .
me : ngithi ngikwenzelani nje lokho ?
him : kulungile mawungafuni ,
ngizoyithola .
me : okay .
he smiled & got out of the taxi , only 2
more passengers to go .

............

Insert 3 .
I'm writing my last paper today , I'm
always late nowadays so my bus had
already took off , & again I'm going to use
taxis .

me : bye gogo .

I left the house running ngijahhe

estobhini , I am tired & my eyes are so red
I was so high last night .

[ taxi rank ]

I got inside a taxi that was going to my

school .

me : san'bona .

"yebo"
those few passengers replied , I sat down
& took my earpods , today I'm going to
listen to beyoncé . I scroll to my playlist
and played "drunk inlove" , I can't even
relate to the song , I'm my own girl & I'm
not in a relationship with anyone & it
doesn't really tear me apart maybe Its
because I'm still working on my self .

I got to school & I get to class . I found

Buhle & Kwanele sitting together &
talking

me : ninjani ?
Buhle : we are good girl , woza nawe
uzompintsha la

they made space for me in the desk & I

also sat down .

Kwanele : did you study ?

me : yes actually , finally siyaqgibel'
ubhala today . I am so tired .

Buhle : lets go to town today ?

me : afterschool or ?

Buhle : yes , how much do ya'll have?

Kwanele : I only have R20 , but my house

is right here , I can go & get more .

me : I have money on my phonecase but I

think its R150 angazi .

I checked my phone cover & I only had

R180 , I always have money with me ,
ugogo taught me ukuthi I should , always .

Buhle : I have R500 , we are just going to

go to Spur & get ribs , milkshakes &
burgers . If there is some money left we
can go to MrPrice & get necklaces then go
after that we can all go home .

me : okay remind me during break to tell

my mom cause nani niyamazi .
Kwanele : yey .
Buhle : simazi kahle .

* the bell rang *

we all walked to our exams rooms

me : nibhale kahle .
Buhle : nawe ubhale kahle mngani .
Kwanele : thank you .

"you sit on your desk & you don't touch

the paper until I tell you to do so , I will
give you 5 minutes for reading and going
through your paper & after that you start ,
your paper is set to 1h30minutes , take
your time readying & start with the
questions that you find easy . " said the
teacher that was there to invigilate our
paper .

.......
that was easy , I wrote my last paper very
well & I think I did pretty well for the
term .

the bell rang & we were all sent home , so

then it was around 10 , we left the school
gate & went to Kwanele's house for her to
get her money .

........

Kwanele's mom : sanibona ngane zami .

me & Buhle : yebo ma .
Kwanele's mom : niyaphila kodwa?
us : yes ma siyaphila .
Kwanele's mom : kuyafundeka kod...

Kwanele : ay ay ay mama , abazelanga

lokho , bazongphelezela siye town &
ngizobuya ebsuku ; musake lokhu
ubabuza imbuzo ongenasdingo .
I don't like the way Kwanele speaks to her
mom , its harsh & horrible .

me : yo kwanele?

Buhle : kuhamba kahle kakhulu eskoleni

ma , besizimisele sonke futhi sasebenza
ngokuykhandla for this term , kuyimanje
nje sisaya emall sobuya ntambama sifuna
ukuykhipha .

she smiles .

Kwanele's mom : kulungile zingane zami ,

nihambe kahle , nibe safe futhi .
nginithanda intende .

me : siyabonga ma , nathi siyakthanda .

we left & we were walking to the stop

while discussing this whole Kwanele &
being unmannered matter .
me : that was rude dawg .
Buhle : bro .

Kwanele : guys kanti what is wrong ngoba

phela umuntu kumele umtshele iqiniso .

me : aksuye umuntu nje loya , thats your

mom . you can't be talking to her like that
.

Buhle : it was so unlike you .

me : we must say , noma ngabe ujwayele

ukuyenza , ungayenzi sikhona .
uyasnyanyisa thina shem .
Buhle : awuschazi nje .

we lectured her waze wathula wangazi

naye uzothini .
Kwanele : sengzwile , can we get over it .
me : masesbuya ufike uxolise nakuye .
we got to the mall , its a very warm
wednesday & the mall is not that full so
we first went on the elavator , we took
alot of pictures & videos .

[ @ spur ]

Buhle : what are we eating ?

me : lets order ribs , chips & burgers .
Kwanele : milkshake flavours?
Buhle : okay uhm kitkat for me .
me : oreo .
Kwanele : I will also have oreo .

we called the lady to take our orders &

then we were waiting while I texted my
mom & told her my whereabouts .
[ chat ] - 12 : 27pm .

me : I'm in town with Kwanele & Buhle .

mom : uzobuya nini ?
me : around 4 or 5 .
mom : pho ufunani kimi ?
me : lutho , are you at home?
mom : nope . ngzophuma u 3 .
me : okay bye .

"R300 has been tranfered from Ref

no.36753347.khumalo"

me : thank you my sweet mom .

mom : K .

we got our food & started digging , took

aesthetic photo's , inkinga we are still on
our uniforms , but besides that we has so
much fun & we enjoyed .
around half past 1 we left & started
window shopping by H&M . goshhhh
clothes from here . we looked around &
took alot of mirror pictures , gang pictures
& then we went to TheFix , we looked at
bikinis ; we then made our way to
MrPrice . we brought necklaces &
handbracelets . I brought myself a cute
croptop at R79.99 & when we were done
we went to the till .

you will not believe who was at the till .

its that mageza guy from the taxi rank ,
the one I think his name was Mthobisi or
Mthokosizi but yea that one & yena he
was working at the till . I called Buhle to
shortly explain it to her ...

me : remember that guy that I told you

about?

Buhle : what guy?

me : argh that mageza that I told you was

there etaxi rank & abanga iscefe , I was
texting you while ...
Buhle : ohhhh yeaaa , what about him?
me : nangyana . its him .
Buhle : mageza Sne ? at a MrPrice till ?
me : yesss , okay uzobona .

"cela olandelayo"

we walked towards his spot .

him : awu Sne , galela elihle .

*I look at Buhle with 1 eye*

me : uhm? hi .

him : awusangikhumbuli? kade ungbona

nje eynsukwini , mngani wami .

me : please remind me ?
him : Mthobisi Mthembu , ngihlangane
nawe nje ungekdala , ngacela nenumber
yakho kodwa ubungibuka kabi , futhi
ungiph...
me : ohhhhh hi .

I passed him the things that we were

buying while Buhle & Kwanele were
looking at me like I'm some sorter crazy .

Mthobisi : namanje awukafuni nenumber

yakho ? akunankinga ngizoshiya eyami
kwislip ngibe sengilindele eyakho .

me : *laughs* whuu cha uyayithemba bo

bhuti , siyabonga .

we took our plastics & walked outside the

door , we are now talking ...

Buhle : what was that ?

me : anje ngikutshelile .
Kwanele : nikhuluma ngani?

we explained the whole story to Kwanele

& then walked woolworths to buy snacks .
[@ woolworths]

me : Buhle please take soursweets & the

orange doritos , I will go and get the
drinks while you Kwanele get the
chocolates after that we are vaying home ,
my legs are dead tired .

I paid for the snacks and separated our

things into different plastics & we all
walked to the taxi rank , I only have R80
left & thats for the taxi & I will buy weed
with the rest .

we are at the taxi rank and saying our

goodbyes , too sad we might only see each
other when schools open because I am
going to visit my grandfather & cousins in
Eastern Cape , Buhle will be in Joburg to
visit her aunt while Kwanele is going to
Durban to visit her dad & step mom .
me : I love you guys so much .
Kwanele : I am going to miss you yo .
Buhle : group hugggg .

we hugged & it was a bit emotional .

me : one last group photo ?

Kwanele : at the rank pho Sne ?
Buhle : just for memories Kwanele chill .

inkinga yaKwanele thinks everyphoto will

go to facebook & instagram !

we took the picture & hugged , kisses were

blown & we all went to our different
directions , its now 3 : 14 & I will definetly
be at home by 4 pm .
by choice I thought I should take the front
seat , for today only though .

me : sanibona .

I always greet yazi , like always . its more

like a habit now .

3 more passengers then we go . my phone

is now on 7% so I texted mom & told her
that I'm at the taxi rank now & I thanked
her for the money , I called gogo to also
tell her that I'm on my way now .

hawe ma again , the person who is

driving us today is the mageza from
mrprice . he gets inside & greets .

Mthobisi : yazi abantu mabedalelwene

balokhu behlangana nje kuvele
kuziqondanele nje .
me : utsho nje ? *sarcasm*

Mthobisi : ngisho njalo .

me : yea ne .

he starts to drive & opens the window ,

now his cologne is smelling *very nice* .

money passed to the front & I calculated

the whole thing & gave people their
change..... & look at me getting good at this
maths thing *winks*

everyone was minding their own business

& this guy yenake ayy .

Mthobisi : awushoke , unangaki ?

yazi I am trying to not be rude ; I am

acting all nice & talking to him ngoba vele
my phone will die anytime .
me : ngina14 .
Mthobisi : ngampela?
me : yea , ngathi ngnangaki mongbuka?
Mthobisi : ngathi una 16 , 17 kanje .
me : ay ushaye phansi . ngina 14 mina .
Mthobisi : ufunda ugrade ba?

I took time to reply ngoba I was still

calculating & trying to remember ukuthi
konje ngankathi ngina14 ngangfunda
ugrade ba .

Mthobisi : asqale phansi ngikbuze . una...

me : cha ungaqali phansi , ngna17

ngfunda ugrade 11 , ngihlala eB2 ,
ngfunda eMasakhane nguSnezintombi
Aze Mtshali .

Mthobisi : ngiyajabula ngampela

ukukwazi , nami ngingazazisa ?
me : yea sure .

he has dimples , darkskinned & has nice

hands , uwumageza kodwa muhle yena .
unuka kahle futhi he looks young .

Mthobisi : nguMthobisi Ndumiso

Mthembu , nguMvelase , UMnisi wemvula
, thina esabon ...

me : * laughs out of blush* ayibo you are

still introducing yourself njalo ?

Mthobisi : ehhena hhawu , ngineminyaka

ewu24 , ngishayela amatekisi mese
ngisebenza ka'MrPrice njengamatohho
ami aseceleni . nginamabusiness awu 3 ;
yawubo lo Mcdonalds okhona khona la no
MrPrice ? kowu2 kungaphansi kwegama
lami mese ngiphinda ngiba namataxi awu
16 khona erank ang'phushela imali
nyangazonke . ngiqede evarsity
emnyakeni emibili edlule ngase
ngangawuthola umsebenzi ingakho
ngaziqalela lamabusiness . ngyindodana
yababa yona yodwa kephake yena
ubefuna ngithole umfazi kungakapheli
lonyaka khona eyokwazi ukungishiyela
lonke ifa lakhe ezandleni zami .

eh ngashonelwa umama ngizalwa , ngabe

sengikhuliswa ubaba , yebo ngimncane
kodwa inqondo iphusile futhi
ngihlakanaphile , anginalutho
ngaphandle kweynhloso ezinhle .

he was talking & I was listening to him ,

he has a very sensitive background , I
know I just met him but he seems to be a
good guy , really though ; ukuthi vele I
don't like men , I date boys not men .
I continued starring at him .

Mthobisi : ungilalele nje khona ma ?

me : yes I am listening actually .
Mthobisi : uwehla kuphi neB2 ?
me : eMalwazi street .
Mthobisi : ungaba nenkinga yini uma
ngingehlisa bonke abantu kuqala mese
ngigcina ngawe ?
me : aw' ngeke . I wouldn't like that .
Mthobisi : okay ma , ngivumeleke ngibe
nenumber yakho .
me : still nje kwalokhu , you are still a
stranger . I can't do that .
Mthobisi : kulungile , ngizokunika
iskhathi osifunayo mina , ngyindoda
enesneke .
me : thanks , kodwa yazini ? 078 333 2221

Mthobisi : ngyabonga , *he takes it down

on his phone while driving* ngijabulile
ukukwazi ntokazi enhle , cha khona
umuhle , ushaya nangeyhlathi ezikhulu -
phele , nesitho esigcwele . ngithathekile
mina mama .

me : ngyabonga kakhulu . sengyehla .

I took my 2 plastics ngase ngehlake
me : thanks alot .
Mthobisi : zedlula ikhanda .
I think zedlula ikhanda means thank you
or welcome angazi "izandla zedlula
ikhanda" .

Its 3 : 47 pm . I got off the taxi & went to

Thabiso's house , its a house close to my
house . Thabiso was my kasi
malebestfriend kdala sisakhula , he got
into trouble when his mom found out that
he smokes all types of drugs , nkantini ,
gwayi , whooga , dagga , insangu &
nyaope & thats when he started
distancing himself from most of his
friends including me , so now we are just
people who live in the same
neighbourhood , he sells weed & I buy
some from him .

*knock knock*
Thabiso : ubani ?
me : uSnezi .
Thabiso : ayikho ishandisi .
me : cela ungvulela Thabiso .

*he opens *
me : unjani?
Thabiso : ngiright ntwana , ufunani?

he has his moods , he looks depressed all

the time & he is so thin , uneyqhomo futhi
semubi manje ; I actually had a dream
when I was 8 that me & him would get
married one day cause we were
bestfriends dawg . even my mom used to
like him & my mom was friends with his
mom until his mom died out of a heart
attack , so now Thabiso lives alone & is
always indoors , dropped out of school at
grade 8 & hates all his relatives .

me : hhawu ngyakcela . I just finished my

exams , ngifuna ukusaduka nje kuphela . I
will pay extra mawufuna .

Thabiso : uyahlupha Sne . ufuna ukufana

nami ne? ufuna ukuba njengami ?

me : awu please , don't be like that . can

you just give me khona ngzohamba .
he gave me 2 packets at I gave him R50 . I
put the stuff in my bag and said my
goodbyes to him , I walked home & I got
there exactly at 3 : 58 pm .

I get home & knocked & walked in .

gogo : suze wabuya .

I found her watching TV & drinking tea .
me : sawubona salukazi sami . usebuyile
umama ?
gogo : cha akakobuyi , ubhalekahle?
me : kakhuuulu gogo , ngsafuna ukugeza
nje kuphela mese ngyabuya ngzohlala
nawe la ngikuxoxele ngosuku lwami .
gogo : phuthumake . she smiles*

I put the plastics on top of my bed &

quickly charged my phone , I turned it on
& its on 2% . I left the water running in
the bathtub & I checked my whatsapp .

* chats *

BFFS : 133+ pictures .

Mom : ngizodlula egarage ususendlini?
+27 797435790 : sawubona .

I ignored all that & took off my uniform &

put it in the washing basket , took my
cosmetics & pjamas to the bathroom . I
made my water really hot so I could stay
there for a while .

I laid on my back & had my legs closed &

folded up . I was in the deepest thoughts .

he was so calm & understanding , he was

so handsome , smart & charming .
I guess its just imizwa nje , into ezodlula .
Insert 4 .
a few days later ...

Its march holidays , school closed & I'm

listening to my earphones , in the car with
my mom & grandma we are going to
Qunu in the Eastern Cape to visit my
grandfather & his other grandchildren
who are my cousins .

well ngizwe umama talking to her phone

ukuthi one of my cousins is having
umhlonyana , its more like a sweet 16 but
in isizulu , umsebenzi owenzelwa
intombazane at the age of 16 when they
finally get to their mentruation stage .
well I never got that cause I just didn't
really see the need .
my mothers parents (grandparents) are
still love birds , its just that grandma lives
with us because grandpa has 2 other
wives & they were forever fighting so they
both felt that the the long distance would
be better .

I haven't been here in about 2 years & I'm

only here for 6 days & I will tell you on
day by day about my visit here .

..........

we had finally arrived ekhaya elikhulu &

all my cousins are here . most have grown
, since I haven't seen them in a long time .
*get out of the car* it looks very busy yo .

S'bahle : sneizyyyy !
me : girrrrrrl .
we hugged for a really long time .
S'bahle is my favourite cousin , she is the
best , we are both in the same grade & we
enjoy spending time with each other . she
is the only person that actually
understands me , gets me & not to sound
cheeky but I am always the cousin ; my
cousins are always happy to see .

S'bahle : osemhle mtase .

me : seke wazibona wena ! chini .

we speak xhosa here , 24/7 , a little bit of

isizulu & english here & there .

S'bahle : masambe sobulisa utata .

her father who is my uncle .

we enter his house & find her father &

mother talking .

uncle : awu ntombiyami (daughter) .

me : sanibonani *I smile*
aunt Thabile : uphilile ntombi .
me : ewe , I'm doing good .
uncle : nathi siphilile , uphasile angithi ?
me : asikazitholi ireports zethu tanci
(uncle) sizawuzifumana when schools
open .

aunt Thabile : okhonokho uyazazi man

wena ukuthi uphasile .

uncle : uyazazi wena ba sebenze njani .

me : yea phela ndyazazi ba ndiphasile ,
akunogeja , soze .

we laughed & Sbahle was just standing by

the door & smiling the whole entire time .

uncle : kulungileke mshana .

I said goodbye & went with Sbahle to

great all the other uncles , aunts & cousins
.
me : where are the other girls ?
Sbahle : bayokhamanzi emfuleni .
me : yoo . wena usaleleni?
Sbahle : I also had other things to do phela
ayibo , andinokwazi libele ngyokhana
namanzi & later on ngoba nawe usufikile
sizoyotheza . kuningi man . kubusy nje
nawe uyazibonela , we are all preparing .
me : theza as in like inkuni & stuff ? &
please awungihlebele , owabani umcimbi
?

*she laughs*

Sbahle : whuuu ah *laughs* uzuthi "and

stuff " yebo sis , inkuni & stuff . oka
Neliswa , uzoba nomhlonyana , in just 5
days . we have been preparing for 3
weeks , so yena uNeliswa is inside lowa
rawondi , she has to be there for 1 month
& njalo eksuku we are practising songs
since sizobe simumisile .

me : thats cold dawg & isn't she allowed to

go out? but I thought we as xhosa's don't
do that nje .

Sbahle : ay nawe musa ukuphapha ngoba

uyazi ukuthi Neliswa's mom is Zulu .

me : ohhh konje , okay sendyakuva .

we walked and went to greet the others &

lastly to mkhulu (grandfather) .

I knock .

grandpa : ngubani na lowo?

me : umzukulu wakho omthanda kunabo
bonke , ndivulele ndingene . undibone .
grandpa : iphimbo ngyaliva , ngena .

Sbahle stands again by the door & I take

my shoes off and walk in .
grandpa : ndyalingwa ndipha uYesu
ayezilele khona ukutshya . ndisehlane
yini?
he says that meaning am I testing him &
his patience cause I'm walking inside his
house while wearing pants , he hates it
when intombazane izaqgoka iblukwe .

I just laughed .
grandpa : ungowaphi wena ?
I look at him & he stands up ..... gives me a
really tight hug & says

grandpa : ZIYOKHAMANZI ! ufike nini ?

ziyokhamanzi as in like
"Snezintombiziyokhamanzi" him &
grandma named me like that when I was
born , the name is too long & unique
inkinga my mom doesn't like it thats why
I'm only Snezintombi .

me : ndisadakfika , ngifike nomakhulu

nomama , bendizobulisa kalokhu ndiva
kuthe ubusacambalele .
grandpa : bendilele ndade ndavuka ,
awukhulile mntanamntanami , udlani ?
me : lutho ukube uyayazi .

we continued chatting & he was asking

me about boys & if I'm still a virgin &
nothing about school , just mojola & sex .
*veryyy uncomfortable*

I finally went ghost & told him I needed

the bathroom , I then went to the big
kitchen ; so many ladies were there , the
wives , aunts & older sistercousins .

I greeted & most were happy to see me ,

my mom had went to her house ( the
house she lives in only when she visits
here ) .

older cousin Wendy : wozoqoba la .

me : Ini kqala?
Wendy : uyakwazi khona?
me : I can try *I smiled*
and they bust in a loud laughter .
I then went to my mom's house & left
S'bahle by the kitchen .

me : mama ?
mom : yebo . ngingalana .
I walked in .
mom : usubingeleli ?
me : yes , wonkumntu .
mom : nomkhulu ?
me : ngyile kuye . usendlini yakhe .
mom : okayike , hambake uyogumula
iblukwe uqgoke noma ingubo or isketi
ngoba asisekho eJozini lana .

I did just as she had said . I wore a long

skirt & I took my phone to check the time
& its now 3:19pm . I made my way back to
the big kitchen .

me : it smells really nice .

Sbahle : awufuni siyekulabanye ?
me : anje uthe basemfuleni .
Sbahle : yea , soya khona nje .
me : yooooo . azikho igebengu la?
S'bahle : kanti yini inkinga yakho ngoba
uke uze la , usuyaphapha manje .
me : nooo , ukuthi... okay asambenike .

I told my mom & she agreed , on the way

we were talking about grade 11 since we
both in the same grade , she told me about
her boyfriend & since I had nothing to tell
to her about mjolo , I just told her about
what was happening in school .....

me : can I tell you something , but don't

judge me ngyakcela .
Sbahle : oww , okay ?
me : I smoke now ; insango though .

she gave a "haibo sies" look .

me : you said you wouldn't jugde .
Sbahle : nditheni mtase ? I said nothing .
me : but your eyes .
Sbahle : no , kanti uqinisile ?
me : ehhena . angdlali .
Sbahle : okay tell me waqala njani , nini ?
futhi ngobani Sne? uyazi umawakho?
me : nd'phendule muphike umbuzo?
Sbahle : okay , does your mom know? me :
obviously no .
Sbahle : uyenzelani lanto man ?
me : I just wanted to taste ...
Sbahle : wavele wa ' addicted huh?

me : uyangthethisa yini pho?

Sbahle : ungtsheleleni nje lento? yazi

iyandonyanyisa tuu intombazane
ebhemayo . ay man sies , cela nje
ungabhemi laykhaya ngoba uzobanjwa
nje strong .

she continued lecturing bullshit & we

finally got to the river , sobay7 we are all
in highschool & then they were 5 who at
the river , 2 were swimming & the other 3
were filling in water in the backets while
me & Sbahle arrived .

me : heyyyyy yaaaaall .
them : hhawe maa !
Sihle : mtaseeeeeee !
Sbonga : ufike nini?

Nosipho : izapha !

I walked towards them *

Thandeka : awusukhuluphele .
Lulama : asisakwazi wesisi .
me : laughs* I missed yall .
Nosipho : awusasho masuza ntombi .

me : bengzosho but it had to be a suprise

*giggles*
I hugged the other 3 & the other 2 were
wet I couldn't but I was also excited to see
them . I love their hype & vibe .

Nosipho : uzolala nathi angithi endlini

yezintombi ?

Lulama : siyakucela mtase .

me : okay ngzolala nani .
Sbahle : sosale sesinilindake .

they finished swimming & filling in theirr

backets , we all walked home while they
were singing a song , I don't know it but it
goes .

"mina angazi ngonani weee"

"dlala ngami ngize ngbona awusendaba"
"yen' unglahlile"
"oh myekeleni angale bo"
"yen' unglahlile
"ubevel' engasangthandi"
"yen' unglahlile"

catchy but hard so I joined them and we

all sang together walking in a line back
home they had buckets in their heads , a
true defination of
"Snezintombiziyokhamanzi" .

Insert 5 .

we arrived home & they went to put the

backets by the kitchen . mom was in the
kitchen still with the other ladies .

mom : Sne , awuyongbhekela ifoni yami

emotweni .

she gives me the keys .

the kitchen was really filled with people
yerrr , I took the keys & walked to my
mom's car and the girls stayed behind to
greet her & gogo .

I found the phone & also stole some

cheppies (suger gum) my mom's car is
always filled with sweets and gum .

I walked to the kitchen and hide the gum

in my pocket , I gave her ; her phone &
keys and went outside with my girls .

Thandeka : uphasile?
me : no asikaze wathole amareports .
nina?
them : obvioussss , yes , akugeji .
me : thats nice , asithole indawo
yokuhlala , sizawhlalaphi ?
Sihle : masambe sohlala noNeliswa
karawondi .

me : okay asqale sishuthe kqala .

I took out my phone from the pocket of
my hoodie ....

3 missed calls from +27 797435790 .

1 missed call from Buhle .

network is on 1 bar . I forgot that the

network is baaaaad around here .

who's number is this by the way ? ay I will

call it later . we took a few pictures by
karawondi & we walked inside .
me : cuzzzz !
Neliswa : awu sis wami .
we hugged , she had some orange face
mask , she was also a bit stinking like
benuka but its because akumele ageze
until the big day comes .

we all sat and we were talking non stop .

we placed icansi ( grass mat ) sat down
while catching up & talking about school ,
boys & parents , on how things are around
here & I told them I'm leaving after
Neliswa's big day . a verry long but nice
day , I enjoyed .

........
its day 2 , the chickens make noise at 5 : 32
& "krrrukukukruuu" . people wake up to
start their day .

I wake up & check my phone , still no

network , I can't get on facebook ,
instagram nor whatsapp but I can pick up
calls or call people . last night I called
Buhle & told her my network situation .

I had slept on the floor with a sponch , no

wonder I feel tired & my body is painful .
yesses ; I look around me , we are all
sleeping in a line on sponches & mats , its
8 girls including me . I think the house we
are sleeping in is called the "indlu
yeyntombi" because its only a house for
girls ? i think .

I do have male cousins by the way , but

basuke bengekho emini , bahamba
eksenii beyolusa babuya ebsuku
neynkomo sebebuya nokuyoshela (ask
girls out) .

aunt Lindi : vukani bo , ayivuke intombi ;

sekusile , angfuni amantombazane alala
kuze kungene elanga eynqeni .

I inner laughed but also mad cause she

was pulling the blanket & savele sagodola
.

me : sesvukile aunt .
aunt Lindi : izani ekitchen nizokwenzela
abantu abadala itiye nesinkwa .

we all woke up & made the (bed) . sasonga

ingubo , left uNeliswa cause yena she has
to stay inside , mese sayowasha our faces
only and brushed our teeth .

I first went to my moms house ,

kusathulakele egcekeni yet we have been
harshly woken up to make food for the
male cousins before they go sending out
the cows . ( ukulusa ) .

me : knocks * qo qo . its Sne .

mom : kuvuliwe .

oh she is also awake .

me : unjani ma ? ngizoshintsha ingubo

mese ngzoshuqula ngoba siyokwenza
ukudla for the boys .
mom : okay iduku likhona lapho
eskhwameni , nivuswe ubani ?
me : umakaNosipho ; uaunt Lindi .
mom : mh .
my mom & aunt Lindi don't really ... clash
, they don't like each other because aunt
Lindi loves complaining & doesn't treat
everyone the same , she wants to be
noticed & puts her selfish self first njalo .

I wore a duk' & then my mom gave me

something to protect my skin from
sunburn "khalamani" I just have to apply
it on my face & so my face tone will
remain the same .

I went to kitchen with a face mask & I find

the girls cutting slices of bread , nomunye
uthosa amaqanda , omunye ulungisa
inkomishi zetiye .

aunt Lindi : suma emnyango , hluba nawu

ucheese . iheeee usufake ne' khalamani
ntombi *she laughs sarcasticly* .

I gave her a really "pissed off" look .

me : kunani kanti ngoba uyalibona
nelanga lizoshisa .* I smile sarcasticly *
aunt Lindi : uyifumanephi
leyokhalamani?
me : ngyinikwe uma.
aunt Lindi : nditshilo kodwa , awusebenze
ntombi usiyeke thina nezikhalamani .

she left me & the girls who were in the

kitchen , she has to go wake the boys up &
to tell them that breakfast is almost ready
.

thats cold though , some people here have

bad attitude . atleast I'm here for a few
days .

me : how can I help ?

Thandeka : boil the water again & pour it
in the cups , then go fetch the trays
endlini enkulu .
me : trays for what ?

S'bahle : ukuze sophatha ngawo & send it

to them .
me : send it to them futhi ? hhaa ngekeke ,
bona abakwazi yini ukuza bezoylandela?

Nosipho : usiko Sne .

Sbonga : awunokwazi ukulophikisa .
me : nizokwenza nodwa bafethu we can't
wake up at 5 & prepare food for men &
send it to them with trays....

aunt Lindi : ey ungcolile ngane . doti muni

nje lo owuthethayo , uyadelela
wenangane yomuntu .

silence ...

my phone rang *
everyone was starring at me , I took it out
of my pocket , its a random number , I
think its the same number that called me
yesterday ngase ngakhohlwa ukubuyela
back to it ...
me : hello ?
caller : unjani ekseni sthandwa sami .

confused*

I walk out ...

aunt Lindi : eyanto kuphela oyaziyo .

[outside] . *phone call*

me : cokbuza ubani longikhuluma naye?

caller : uMthobisi .
me : ohh unjani ? *smiles*
Mthobisi : ngyaphila unjani mama?
me : nami ngyaphila .
Mthobisi : bengikubheka angisajwayele
ukukbona lana erank , kanti mina
bengithi iyona ndawo yami nawe leyo .

me : yazi ngihlushwa inetwork ,

angikuzwa kahle . besacela ukukfonela
mesengiqedile lento engiyenzayo la .
I ended the call before he could talk back .

ayibo why am I smiling *smiles weirdly*

I then walk back to the kitchen & continue
with what I was doing . I then decided to
respect "usiko" & took the trays , we all
walked in a line going to our brothers
house to give them their food .

me : okay sesqedile ?
Lulama : ay okwamampela .
me : sesowenzani ?
Sihle : izitsha mese siyokhamanzi .
me : okay , asambeni .
we collected the dirty dishes from all the
houses & sathatha indishi eynkulu , took
the water , placed indishi ezu4 in a line .
abaw2 bazoykhipha ukudla , enye i2
izoywasha , enye i2 izoynyakaza .
lomunye oyedwa will be placing them
ngoku hlukanisa ukuthi iziphi eyfayo
nezeplastic , its a bit confusing process
kodwa sayenza .
we are now at the river & sesikhamanzi ,
they love singing ; I'm also learning new
songs , today we are going to be practising
at night . the one they are singing goes

"awu lentombi eqome lomfana"

"ayimale"
"ohlale dakiwe"
"ayimale "
"yenakalazi uthando"
"ayimale , idlala ngothando" .

we walked in a line going back home , its

now quiet busy egcekeni , we then sat
down besifuna ukuphumula .

I checked my phone & remembered to call

Mthobisi .
*ringing - on the phone call *

Mthobisi : mama .

me : yea , I only have 2 minutes break

mese ngyahamba futhi .

Mthobisi : kanti ukuphi ngoba kade

ngilokhu ngizula lana ngakini lutho
ukukbona .

me : ndiseEastern Cape , ekhaya elikhulu .

why were you by my neighbourhood
cause awuhlali napha ?

Mthobisi : bengifa yikho ukuk'khumbula ,

bengingeke ngisakwazi ukungakboni .

me : oh , thanks for being honest . I hope

you enjoy the rest of your day . bye .
Mthobisi : mana , ima kancane uzobuya
nini ? mina ngzokubona nini?

me : ungbonelani kanti , besacela

uhlukane nami phansi , ngyacela .

Mthobisi : angeke ngikwazi .

me : ngobani ?

Mthobisi : ngoba ngyakuthanda ,

ngikuthanda ngakho konke enginakho ,
ngakuthanda ngiqala ukukubheka
eynzulwini zamehlo , ngikuthanda ngisho
ucasukile , uhlinile ngoba cha
ngithathekile , inhliziyo yami uyithathile ;
angikho muhle emazwini kodwa
ngezenzo mina mama ngingakukhombisa
ukuthi ngizifela kanjani ngawe ,
ngivumele nje ungiphe lelithuba .

I listened to this guy , he is charming yena

shame ; sengingalwa kodwa cha he is very
charming .
Mthobisi : sthandwa senhliziyo yami ?
me : ngiyakuzwa . *blushes silently* .

Mthobisi : cela ukuknika iskhathi ukwazi

ukucabanga kahle yonke lento .

me : okay , ngyabonga .

I ended the call *

now I'm really undecided , like I fear so

much about this guy , he came out of his
shell the first time we met & he keeps on
doing things right . I'm a bit charmed if I
must be honest .

Thandeka : Sne , uyakucela uNeliswa

me : mina?
Thandeka : yes , iyaka rawondi , shesha .
me : ndyeza kwelangoku .
[ karawondi ]
me : ya mtase .

I sat next to her .

Neliswa : yazi kunini ngikubiza , ngifuna

ungimise , uzokwazi ukungimisa ?

me : chaza , kanjani ?

Neliswa : uzobe usina eduze kwami mese

sisina , there is still 3 days left , we still
have time ukuthi upractise nawe , plus
more girls are going to be coming

me : jho , you sure you want me to do it

with you? , angikwazi mina ukwenza
lento , kwanami ndothukille .

Neliswa : lalela , ngyazi kuningi

engikucela khona , but ehlisa umoya ,
ngizomiswa uwena noS'bahle mese
abanye bazobe besemnva , usase tight
right ?

me : tight as in ?
Meliswa : usayilo .

I was so lost .

me : ini ? please say the actual word .

Neliswa : ihlo lisasekhona ?

me : Neliswa andiva kwanto oyithethayo ,

ihlo lani ?

Neliswa : argh man . usayitshitshi ?

me : ohhhh . *laughs* yess I am , why ?

Neliswa : sizohlolwa , sonke .

me : hhawe ngampela ?
Neliswa : yess , ngo6 ntambama today
siyaqalake siyapractisa ; sohlolwa
midnight on that day mese ekseni ngo5
sohamba syogeza emfuleni , I haven't had
a bath in 3 weeks , I was just washing
neccesary parts .

me : ay thats alot yo . & yooo sies .

Neliswa : kuzoshesha , so uyavuma ?

me : yes , I'd like to sis . cokbuza?

Neliswa : ngyabongake , buza .
me : if ungaselona kuzokwenzekalani ?

Neliswa : you will be in trouble nje

kuphela & kungenzeka nokuthi
ungasangisinisi .

me : ohh , okay . ngisayodlake akaze

ngidle , mese soyotheza inkuni .

Neliswa : okay , ngyabonga kakhulu .

I walked out , that conversation was nice ;
I can't wait for tonight yazi .

insert 6 .
I made food & sat alone in my moms
house , I miss my friends goshh & its sad I
can't talk to them or send any
messages/vns , the network pisses me off .
I also haven't smoked in 3 days now . I
miss a bit of Jozini , I took my phone &
looked at the pictures of me & my friends
in town during the last day of exams .
*smiles* .

someone knocks *qo qo*

me : ubani ?
Lulama : imina , ucashelana kanti ?
me : angicashile bengsadla yazi , I miss
my friends now yazi .
Lulama : you miss weed too ne ?

I was shocked , how did she know that?

me : huh ?
Lulama : I know .

I bust into a huge laugh *

me : well noooo . ssshh .

Lulama : I can see it in your eyes .
me : awukahle hhawu .
Lulama : vuma kqala .
me : noo hhawu . you are scaring me yazi
, please stop .

her eyes had froze & she kept on acting in

a very weird way telling me admit that I
miss weed . *strange*

Lulama : vuma Sne .

me : yo okay & I also miss weed .

her eyes unfroze , yo .

Lulama : your phone is ringing ; your

boyfriend is calling you .

my phone rang , it rang after she said it

was ringing .

[ phone call ]
me : hello ?
Mthobisi : mama .
me : Mthobisi .
Mthobisi : cela ukukbona .
me : kanjani kanti , I'm very far
kunalapho .
Mthobisi : I will come there .
me : ayibo no , uyaphi ?
Mthobisi : ngitshele keyondawo okuyo
ngize lapho , kuyaphuthuma Sne .
me : haw , uzothi uwubani masula ?
Mthobisi : ngiyazi mina .
me : Eastern Cape eQunu , ekhaya
lakoKhumalo , kubo koMntungwa , kubo
kweNdunu (kings right handman)

my granddad is the kings right hand man ,

the kings best friend , the Khumalo's are
well known because of granddad .

Mthobisi : ngyabonga .

I drop the call , back to this weirdo .

me : my phone only rang after you said it

was ringing , how ?
Lulama : taxi driver ne ?
me : how on earth did you know that ?
Lulama : uyamuwela nawe , suqal'
uyamthanda ?

me : chabo , can we go to the other's dawg

you are really making me uncomfortable
.
Lulama : well he has true love for you .
she stood up & walked out *

I took the plate that I was using to eat ,

closed the door & followed her .
me : mana ; yewena . what do you mean?
Lulama : sothetha , he will come here for
you though , now don't tell anyone about
this , if you do ; uyazilahla wena kqala .

.........

hours passed & its 5 : 37pm , some teenage

girls from around the village , bayangena
bagcwala igceke bonke bazongena
karawondi , baze kumfundelo .

I was by the kitchen with S'bahle .

me : can I ask you something ?
S'bahle : okay .
me : did you tell anyone about the ...
S'bahle : akukhomphefumlo that I told .
me : okay .
S'bahle : yindaba ?

me : I thought you were the only one that

knew here , now something happened
earlier on .

S'bahle : yindaba ?
me : whats up with Lulama ? uyaboniswa
or kukanjani , thetha nami .

S'bahle : ohhh Lulama , she has a gift of

hearing , reading sometimes seeing
exactly whats on a persons mind .

me : unyanisile ?
S'bahle : ewe , she can also tell what can
happen in the next 10 - 20 seconds ,
ubungayazi ?

me : no bengingayazi , her eyes were

freezing & alibele angithusa asho yonke
into engyicabangayo nesazokwenzeka .

S'bahle : she knows now ?

me : yes cabanga . thanks ...

"Sne noS'bahle izani "

we were called to start with the practise ,

we walked inside & about 20 - 25 girls
were there phakathi kwarawondi , its
huge & has space .* I walked in last *

me : sanbona , should I close the door ?

Neliswa : no , sesyaqala cela ungtshelela
umama ukuthi the count is 23 .

I did that & the count was neccesarry

because the mothers had to prepare food
for these girls .

so today is day 1 out 3 that we all practise

& by day 3 , we are going to be practising
the whole night until midnight that they
check our virginities .

they took " isgubhu" a big traditional

drum made out of cow skin , it makes alot
of noise , after that we made a circle &
this girl with a nice voice (Ndalonhle)
starts a song .

" Buph' ubuntombi bakho "

us : " busele , busele emobeni"

they taught us the dance & we all did the

dance while singing , this is very
interesting , some took videos & these
girls are all friendly . we sang more songs
& did different dances . then by 7 : 30 we
all sat down . everyone was sweating &
our mothers & aunts walked in with
plates & some oros juice .

we all enjoyed ujeqe nenyama yembuzi ,

everyone was eating while they were on
their phones & others talking .
I stood up & I wanted some fresh air , I
walked outside & its lights on now , its
around 7:52pm , I decided to go to my
mother's house & just be alone .

I got there & removed the duke , I looked

at myself in the mirror & then decided to
tie my hair in an untidy bun , Thandeka
walked in & smiled .

Thandeka : kthiwa asambe sowasha

izitsha

me : again? ah ngekeke .

Thandeka : ilezi kade sitshya ngazo ujeqe .

me : kanti sophumula nini ?

Thandeka : stop whinning man , noma

ufuna uaunt Lindi azeze pha ?
me : ey yo , okay ngyeza . gimme 5
minutes , I changed into pjamas ;
bengigezile vele ekseni emfuleni , I then
walked to the kitchen ; me , Thandeka &
Nosipho did the dishes while S'bahle ,
Lulama , Sihle & Sbonga had to prepare
for our sleeping space .

we finished with the dishes & all went to

sit eypontshini zethu , saxoxa ; different
conversations .

Lulama : Sne why ungaluki ?

me : I guess I don't want to .
Nosipho : mh .
Lulama : anje you have nice hair .
me : nawe nje you have a nice afro kodwa
awulukile .

S'bahle : I almost forget , umakhulu uthe

mandinazise ba the girls that will do our
hair are coming tommorow , around 1 pm
, we have to atleast wash our hair & then
mese befika , bazoziqhina but Neliswa's
one will be moreee prettier & different ;
you know? since its her day .

Neliswa : *blushes*

they all have nice long afro's , I'm the

only one with straight hair .

Nosipho : that means we have to quickly

do the chores & then sohlamba lezihluthu
.

*we laughed* & continued talking until

midnight , on my right side was S'bahle &
on my left was Lulama . after that we all
slept & said goodnight .

1 : 06 am

I checked my phone to see the time & to

see if Mthobisi had called maybe ...
Lulama : besacela ukukluka amashunqu .
me : awulele nawe , yini amashunqu ?
Lulama : akulaleki . amagoda , your hair
is really beautiful & healthy .

me : okay . thanks .
she sat up & I slept on her thighs mese
wangoqhina amashunqu , we were
talking & she was asking me about my life
in Jozini , she asked about my friends too
.

Lulama : sengiqedile .
me : ngyabongake , njengokungiluka
kwakho , uzongiqaqa * I slept properly &
we cuddled & both said our goodnights .

Insert 7 .
day 3 . its a bit windy , same process ; aunt
Lindi wakes us up , we make our bed & go
prepare breakfast for the boys after that
we all took our towels , clothes & buckets
& made our way to the river ,walking in a
line where me & Lulama are last in the
line .

me : yindaba ningaculi namhlanje ?

*silence*

they were walking too fast & had left me

with Lulama at the back .

Lulama : umuhle Sne .

me : ay Lulama you are weird wena .

okwesngaki selokhu ngfikile ungtshela
leyonto ? *giggles* thanks , again .

Lulama : cela ukubuza into eyodwa ?

me : wait cela ukubuza mina kqala .

Lulama : I know what you want to ask &

yes it is true , I have a gift , I can tell what
you are thinking , I can also tell what will
happen in a few seconds , its true .

me : okay ask what you wanted to ask .

Lulama : you don't have to answer ne , I
will ask you & I will know the answer by
then .

me : okay this is weird . shoot .

Lulama : do you believe in falling inlove
with your own blood or maybe someone
you look as family .

I really don't , I think thats just bullshit ,

like how do you even ....

Lulama : ngyayfumana .
me : why are you asking ?
Lulama : no reason .

we got to the river , sakha amanzi mese

sageza , washed our hair with dirty water
- yess & we carried the buckets using our
hands , we didn't want our hair getting
messed up .

we finally got home & placed the buckets

in the kitchen , our mom's were cooking .

I seem to can't get uMthobisi out of my

mind today , I have to talk to him .

some time after , we then walked to our

room & helped each other blowdry our
hair , Neliswa had washed her's while we
were at the river .

8 ladies walked it with so many packets of

hairpieces & they were going to do our
hair . we all decided to picked the same
hairstyles including Neliswa cause she
said she also liked for us to have the same
hairstyle .

hours later , we were all almost done , it is

so painful nanokuthi vele mina
angikthandi ukuluka , time travels that
now its 5 : 11 pm & the girls are going to
start walking in anytime now .

we were finished & we steamed our

braids , Neliswa decided to curl hers by
the bottom after that we practised .

ndalonhle : "intombi ezlala zidakiwe"

"kogana ba neyntombi ezlala zdakiwe ,
zoganaba" , " leyintombi ezlala zdakiwe"

we sang along & danced , todays practise

was a bit off for me... cause my head is
painful & its all becuse I'm not used to
having my hair done . ukube kuyangami
ngabe ngyayisusa yonke lento esekhanda .
I left the room before practise was
finished & I had to call Mthobisi .

I went inside my mom's house & found

her sleeping so I took my phone & stood
my the door outside . I dial to his number
.

[phone call]

me : Mthobisi .
Mthobisi : mawengane zami .
me : ayibo *Iaughing* , angnaso iskhathi
esiningi okwamanje kodwa Mthobisi ,
ngizimisele ngokuknika ithuba
ngenhliziyo nangothando lwami , ngicela
ukut....

Mthobisi : awuzwe ; awuzwe ! ningadlali

nami bafana mina sengiqonyiwe

he sings out of excitement & joy ...

me : angikakaqedi phela

*blushes*

Mthobisi : ungasaqhubeki mamasendlini ,

ngiyeza lapho , ngzokubona . nginikeze
noma insuku eymbili kusematasa la
erank .

me : okay , ngyabonga .
Mthobisi : kubonga mina , ngyakuthanda
ma , ngeslungu bathini ?

me : bathi I love you .

we both laughed .

me : sengyahambake sokhuluma ksasa ,

ulalekahle , byee .
Mthobisi : nawe ulalekahle themba lami .
I dropped the call & smiled weirdly , I
place my phone on my chest (heart) &
look up the stars . ngingenwe yini
ngampela .

I went back to the other girls & to only

find that practise is over , we went to
wash the dishes & yesses I couldn't stop
thinking about Mthobisi .

[ in the kitchen ]

Nosipho : cela undicelele insipho yezitsha

.
S'bahle : isiphelile cinga .

me : does that mean angeke sisaywasha?

Thandeka : ikhona insipho , mana

ngyobheka endlini kamama .
she went back & came with it , we washed
the dishes & all went to our sleeping room
.
Neliswa : kubuhlungu ikhanda .
me : dawgg ! like liyasinda lizoqathaka .
Thandeka : ey nanike nenza ngathi
niyaqala manje ukuluka .

they laughed *
me : asiqali , kuk'hlungu nje siyatsho .

ngavele ngadonsa ingubo ngangena

phakathi ngalala .

S'bahle : ow , Sne are you okay ?

me : yea ngiright .

I took my phone & the whole room was

silence , everyone was starring at each
other & wondering whats going on .

I guess I'm having a very bad mood , I'm

just emotional right now I want to be with
my friends & Mthobisi , I want to be high
& I'm tired of being treated like this here ,
I just want to go back to Jozini .

Lulama : myekeni , let her be .

I smiled under the blanket & took my

phone , I tried calling Mthobisi 3 times &
he never picked up .

by then everyone went to sleep , I was still

in thoughts about him & how are we
going to push this , I couldn't sleep & its
now 2am , I scrolled down to my old chats
with Buhle & Kwanele , laughing my ass
out & checking out our videos & pictures
together .

Lulama : sis .
I was shocked .

me : awulele futhi ?
Lulama : I always fail to sleep at night .
are you okay ?

me : not really . * I sit up *

Lulama : uyafuna ukuthetha ngayo ?

me : I can trust you ?
Lulama : yes .

we both started talking & I told her about

my friends , Mthobisi , how I now feel
about him now , I told her how much I
miss weed & also can't stop thinking about
Mthobisi , I start to cry & she hugs me &
brushes my back , I cuddled on her
shoulder .

Lulama : I have a way that I think can

comfort you .

me : you do ?
Lulama : yes , lets go .
me : where are we going .
Lulama : sshh , iza .

she stood up softly to not wake the others

& grabbed my hand , we were both in
summer pjamas , I took my phone & we
opened the door , its very dark & quiet
outside , we closed the door & she was
leading the way mina I held her hand &
followed her .

me : musa ukushesha phela .

I turned my phone torch on .

Lulama : cima .

she kept running , we are still in the home

premises inking we are going behind
houses & we finally got (endlini enkulu)
where our grandparents sleep .

she opened the door .

me : Lulama wenzani ?
Lulama : linda la , I will walk in & come
out , give me 1 minute ; ungasuki la
ngyakcela .

me : ngyasaba phela , sizobanjwa .

Lulama : mawutatazela vele sizobanjwa ,
relax , ndzabuya ngoku .

she walked in & in 2 minutes she came

back with a key that holds the keys for all
houses .

me : uyahlanya la ekhanda .
Lulama : sssshh . asambeni .
she grabbed my hand again , sama phezu
kwetshe (stone ) elikhulu & she opened a
door that I also didn't see .

me : * opened my eyes really wide *

Lulama : asingene .

she closed the door , she turns on the

light
me : sikuphi la ?
Lulama : this is more like ... angazi
ngzothi yini , but igugu that my parents
left for me , no one knows about it even
grandpa doesn't know , yet he .....

* my phone rings*

oh shit , its Mthobisi .

Lulama : answer it .
me : no , it can wait .
I declined .

me : how did you know about it?

Lulama : my parents had told me about it
in a dream few days later they passed on
.

Lulama lost both her parents the same

day that I lost my dad , they all died in a
car accident coming to some wedding
here in Qunu yet Lulama was in boarding
school by that time & I was home with my
mom .

me : oh , so this will comfort me ?

we walked around this place , it is

amazing inside here & there is a bed ,
shower khona ngisho nosofa .

Lulama : ewe , it always conforts me ,

come here .

she sat on the bed & I also jumped in .

me : umuntu wawugcina nini umbhede
ontofontofo .
Lulama : yea , I know right .
me : what grade are you in konje ?
Lulama : grade 12 .
me : still in boarding school ?
Lulama : yes .
our eyes , she gave me the eyes , I gave
her the eyes . she looks like she wants to
kiss me , no why am I even thinking of
that , she can read my mind ....

Lulama : do you mind if I do ?

oh no .

me : uhm *confused* I don't kn...

she slowly got close & kissed me . I kissed
her back . we closed our eyes & kissed
again , kissed for a very long time .
she backed out .

Lulama : ngyaxolisa , celuxolo , I wasn't

supposed to do that ; you are my sist...

me : sshh ? do it again .

she kissed me again , her hands slowly

went to touching my thighs , we kissed & I
laid on my back with her body above
mine yet not touching because now I'm
locked by her arms , her hand slowly
moved to get underneath my pjama short
.

Lulama : can I ?
me : yes you can .

we kissed me while her hands removed

my short & her touchy hands were on to
my titts .

its my first time kissing a girl solokho

ndazalwa , its the best feeling of being
now handled with touchy hands going all
over your body . I was a bit turned on , I
guess everything has a start .

she stopped kissing my lips & went to my

neck , as tickling as this is , I couldn't
laugh , she was giving me so many neck
kisses .

she whispered on my ear .

Lulama : isqalo esi ? (first time)
me : yea .
Lulama : zungaworry , I wouldn't make
you regret a moment of this time .

what is that even suppose to mean ? this

girl is handling my body like gosh on
damn , I've never felt like this about
anything before .

*she smiled & winked * its my first time

seeing Lulama smile , she has a smiley
peircing & her smile is beyond perfection .

she went to removing my underwear &

her eyes were giving , they were giving
some sexual vibes . she pulled my leg up &
folded them opened , went down to
touching my pot (clit) , rubbed her thumb
slowly around my pot & she went to the
whole cake with her face , muffing my clit
" ahh " what a feeling of feeling loved , I
felt her tougue going around my cake &
softly this girl made me cum .
she put back on my underwear & left a
lovebite on my right thigh .

I smiled & sat up straight ...

Lulama : how are you feeling now?
I laughed *

we had walked back to place the key

endlini enkulu , and walked back to our
room around 3:36 am knowing well that
we are going to be waken up at 5 .
we cuddled & slept .

Insert 8 .

day 4 . I had spent the whole day trying to

run away from Lulama , not that I'm
going ghost on her , I just don't know how
to face her after what happened , I was
with gogo , I haven't spoken to her in days
now & thats because I'm always busy .

the day was long & now its 6 pm , intombi

zasesgodini ziyagcwala ekhaya ,
namhlanje its the final day of the practise,
we are practising the whole night & at
00:00am , omama bomhlanga bazoza
bezosihlola after that siyadla mese
siyaqhubeka siyafundela , sonke ngo5
siyogeza emfuleni & wear our traditional
attire , walk back home in a song & by
7am ; umcimbi uzoqala , even the King is
coming .

we all got inside kaRawondi & I'm

standing next to S'bahle , Nosipho &
Neliswa , Lulama is not even here .

Thandeka : uphi uLulama ?

Nosipho : uthe uyagula akekho right .
me : uphethwe yini ?
Nosipho : andazi , masqaleni ; ixesha
ilona elingasekho .

singing .

Ndalonhle : "wezintombi anibophelela"

us : " ampeya , ampeya "
Ndalonhle : "kulomcimb' esoba nawo"
us : "ampeya , ampeya"

uThandeka uzobe eshaya isgubhu .

we stood in a way that we are going to be
standing in tommorow .

Neliswa in the middle , me & S'bahle on

her left & right sides , the other sisters
behind us & the others behind the others
*confusing* .

we sang & danced , as fun as it was , I still

wanted to atleast see Lulama .
I walked to Nosipho & whispered .
me : uphi uLulama?
Nosipho : yazi andazi nyani , mbheke in
her parents house or the kitchen .
me : okay thanks .
I walked to the kitchen , no sign of Lulama
& then I walked to her parents house , this
house has been alone for a very long time
, she can't be here .

me : *knocks* qo qo .
Lulama congvulela .

Lulama : nguSne loyo ?

she was crying .

me : yes . ndicelu vule umnyango .

she opened at threw her self to me ,
hugged me really tight .

me : yindaba , why ukhala ? talk to me .

I got inside .
she whiped her tears

Lulama : bengicathi uyangbalekela .

me : no , I wasn't why would ... wait is that
why you are crying ?

Lulama : not really , I'm scared about

something that might happen .

me : indaba ? kukhwinto oyibonisiwe ?

Lulama : *smiles* no , angithi you heard

that they are going to check if we virgins
or not , bazosihlola ?

me : oh yea , so ?
Lulama : andisayiyo mna & I'm scared
that if it comes out then the whole family
bazayazi & they will jugde me .

me : ohh , I'm sorry , but can't you say

that awuthandi ?
Lulama : angeke bevume .
me : okay asambeni , I have a plan .
Lulama : tell me .
me : no asambeni , you are missing out ,
yazi kumnandi njani pha , lets go .

Lulama : okay help me go wash my face

first & then we can go .

we went back to the other girls & joined

them , singing & dancing till we all got
tired , by 11 : 52 pm , we were told that
the ladies who are going to check us have
arrived , so we all went to stand in a line
outside . they said if you are a virgin then
they will put a small white dot on your
forehead , makes no sense but its culture .

we all walked in one by one , Neliswa

started first & had the dot , followed by
me & S'bahle , we both got the dots . I told
Lulama to get there & tell them that she is
on her period & wouldn't feel comfortable
to be touched *smart me* she did that &
got out with dot too .

me : batheni ?
Lulama : they said "akukhonxaki uyilo
vele wena siyakubona & placed the dot"

me : hhawe ma , I told you it would work

.

we laughed & then we were all done & got

back inside to sit down & eat , I went out
to answer Mthobisi's call .

[ phone call ]
Mthobisi : mama .
me : unjani ?
Mthobisi : ngyaphila singezwa kuwe
themba lami .
me : nami ngyaphila .

Mthobisi : bengifuna ukutshela ukuthi

ngiyasuka manje ngize lapho .
me : ngo1 pho ?
Mthobisi : yea ngifuna ukufika ekseni ,
ngizwile ngomhlonyane okhona lapho .

me : uzwe ngoba ?

Mthobisi : ngizenzelile uphenyo ,

ngiyezake ngizokubuka usina , nesimemo
senginaso .

me : yhoo ay , uneymanga .

Mthobisi : ngizokubuka usina , ngifuna

nokukunchoma .

ukunchoma is giving money ,

ukunchonywa is getting money after zulu
dancing , if a person is impressed , they
give you free money & place it in your
hair .
me : *giggles* sekumele ngihambe shuthi
ngzokubona eksenike .

Mthobisi : kulungile ; ngyakuthanda

mama .
me : okay , bye .

I ended the call , I couldn't say it back , I

wanted to but failed .

I went back inside & we finished eating ,

umuntu wawasha isitsha sakhe .

some men came in one big van .

me : obani laba ? are they also family ?

Sihle : no , bazofaka ithende .
me : oh & the decor ?
Sihle : yes all that .
Neliswa looks happy , she has been stuck
in that room , couldn't get out for the
whole 3 weeks , I heard she also didn't
finish her exams because apparently the
ancestors wanted this to be done asap .

Insert 9

Its day 5 now @ 5am sharp & we had

finished (zulu) dancing , we all walked in
a line (33girls) going to the river , Neliswa
infront with a blanket , she was happy
finally going to get a proper bath , we
were singing a very nice song ....
some other girl started .

"lafa izwe lobaba"

"laf' izwe lobaba"
"lafa izwe lobaba"
"kwafika ama2K ... "
"kafika ama2K , kwafika amapiano
,oh lafizwebaba" .
I think this is the best song I've learnt so
far . we sang all the way until we got to
the river .

Thandeka : ayabandake lawamanzi .

we all agreed gosh , its freezing cold ,

kodwa we had no choice but to bath .

saqgibelu hlamba & we walked back

wearing only our skirts & nothing on top ,
they sang again the song "lafa 'zwe lobaba
, laf'izwe lobaba , kwafika ama2k ;
kwafika ama2k , kwafika amapiano ' ooh ,
lafizwe lobaba "

we walked home & Neliswa was stil

covered in a blanket .

we get home & our mothers , aunts &

guests were ulualting " li ; li , li " , the joy
& excitement that they gave , running &
dancing around Neliswa .

we were told to go back to our room to

change & wear the attire , we were told to
not wear t-shirts , our breasts were
supposed to be revealed (seen) . the beeds
were nicely decorated in rainbow colours
but me & S'bahle's was different to others
since thina besimumisile (black&white) ,
Neliswa's was pure white , only white .

saqgibelu ' qgoka & we took our phones &

took pictures , our moms & aunts
complimented us , so many guests were
here . I gave my mom my phone .

me : congphathela , ngzoythola kuwe .

mom : okay , woza ngikushuthe .

I posed & my mom took pictures of me , I

then walked to the place ebesizosinela
khona , we all started & went in a line &
the guests were sitting down , people
were looking at us ; including the King
being there with his wives too .

its a bit uncomfortable walking around

half naked & everything being done here
kuthiwa "its culture" . Lulama kept giving
me eyes & signals , I tried ignoring all that
, I didn't want people suspecting things .

we danced & played along with the songs ,

sasina kwamnandi kwanjeya , people
taking videos , giving us money ( nchoma
)

around 11 we were done , we were called

to give food to guests & we did just that .

[ coming from the kitchen going to where

the guests are ] its not that far , I was
walking along with Lulama & S'bahle ,
Neliswa was there talking to the King
I was so shocked , happy & suprised ,
uyena , I couldn't hold it in .

me : hhawe ma , hawe ma .

I put the tray on the floor & he was

standing talking to his friends , I jumped
to him & his dimples showed , I hugged
him for the longest time , my arms around
his neck & his hands on my back . I'm still
showing my breasts & he hugs me tighter ,
we finally backed out .

people were staring at us ...

me : sanibona , ngyaxolisa .
his friends replied & complimented me .
Mthobisi : ay kulungile majita ngzonibona
.

his friends gave us space & I was blushing

the whole entire time .
Mthobisi : sthandwa senhliziyo yami .
me : yazi ngithunyiwe njengoba ngila ,
asambeni siye ngale .

I winked at S'bahle cause she took my tray

for me .

we walked to a more private & silent side .

Mthobisi : uyayisina ingoma , ngikubheke

lokho niqalile .
me : mina ? ungbonaphi njalo ? *laughs*
Mthobisi : ngikubonile nje , kade ngifikile
mina la , ukuthi bengisemunva .
me : akaze ngikbone nje mina .

he took out his wallet & took out R600

(R200×3) & also placed it with the other
money that I got on my hair .
me : ay ihhabbake manje elani ?
I can't even stop smiling , his cologne is
out there & he is wearing nice tekkies
from nike , a nice nike trackpant with a
leopard t-shirt ; he has umqhele on his
head & 2 cowskin (bracelets) , his fashion
doesn't make sense but it makes sense to
me cause ngyamthanda .

Mthobisi : cha uyintombi yomzulu

ngampela , nebele elihle , limile , umuhle
yazi mama , ubuhle bubuzwa kuwe ,
ongaboni namanje ukuthi umuhle ;
akasophinde .

me : yazi Mthobisi , angyena mina umzulu

.

Mthobisi : uwumzulu wami phela ,

awufuni ukungipha amanzi ewolintshi ?

me : yini amanzi ewolintshi *giggles*

Mthobisi : indodi ' mcelukiss .

me : ohhh , yea ngyafuna .
Mthobisi : manje pho ulindeni ?

I laughed & I know akuhlekisi but because

uMthobisi , kuyahlekisa . I looked at him
& gave him a baby kiss , I backed out & he
pulled my back & kissed his girl , I kissed
him back & his hands slid all to way to my
buttocks (ass) . I felt his diggy do & his kiss
felt so safe , it was like there is nothing
that can ever hurt me.

me : I have to go now , ngzongena

enkingeni if someone was to see me here .

Mthobisi : uzobuyela nini eJozini ?

me : angazi , ksasa or the day after
tommorow .

Mthobisi : kulungile ma , ngicela

uwabamba amacalls ami , njalo
mangifona iphone unokungayibambi .

me : yazi inetwork ayikho la , like du ,

ayikho , ibakhona for lesoskhashana
kodwa I will try , bye .

Mthobisi : mana , ngbheke .

I look at him & laugh .

Mthobisi : ungahleki , uhlekani ? .
me : ukuthi uyanghlekisa yazi , okay
angsahlekike .

he took out his phone & took a picture of

me , he gave me his "umqhele"
Mthobisi : wugcine .

I blushed & took his phone , turned the

camera to a selfie & took 1 picture with
him .
me : send it me ngyacela .

Mthobisi : kulungile , ngyakthanda .

yezwa ?
me : okay *heavy breathe* nami
ngyakthanda Mthobisi .

Mthobisi : uyangthanda ngempela?

me : yea hawu , bye

as I ran back to the other girls , I couldn't

stop smiling , I think I just caught feelings
for him .

they were sitting & eating , my plate was

with S'bahle that she saved for me .

I walked inside kaRawondi & sat down

next to her & Sihle .

S'bahle : kade ekubheka umawakho

cabanga , ngamtshela ukuthi usetoilet .
nakhu ukudla kwakho .

me : ngyabonga kakhulu mtase , yo . okay

uphi uNeliswa noLulama ?
S'bahle : uLulama usekhishini
uyosithathela amadrinks & then uNeliswa
obvious useTendeni with the other guests
.

me : oh , this looks nice . why mina

ungangfakela ibutternut ?
S'bahle : ndyayazi maan ba awuyithandi .
me : wazenjani ?
S'bahle : you told kudala da .

I really hate it , I just want to know how

she knew , we continued eating & Sbahle
was starring at me .

S'bahle : ayibo , oR200 abangaka ?

Lulama walked in with the drinks & cups .

me : yeaaaaa ne ? ndirich .
*she laughed *
S'bahle : no uyithathephi cause mna
azange ndbone muntu ekuchoma
ngalemali ?

me : soxoxa ebsuku , where is my mom ?

I need my phone .

S'bahle : asqede ukudla mese siyakuye .

we finished & drank the drinks too .

S'bahle : asambeni .
we stood up & went to my mom in the
kitchen .

me : ma .
mom : yes , cela ungthathela umese ,
kunini ngikubheka , your phone has been
ringing .

I took the knife & gave her .

me : ikuphi ?
mom : ila ephakatheni lephinifa .
I took it & checked the missed calls .
me : enkosi . when are we going back
home?

the other aunts were looking at me .

aunt Lindi : this is home nje sana .

I am not even talking to her yazi , she is

too forward this one .

me : noo , I mean ekhaya eJozini .

my mom : later on tommorow .
me : okay .

we walked out noS'bahle .

me : lets go to my mom's house cause

there is no one there vede .
S'bahle : masambe .
we opened the door & walked in , I saw 2
beautiful dresses on top of the bed .
me : whose dresses are these ?
S'bahle : eyakho nomawakho .
me : I don't know this dress mina .

S'bahle : yea nami eyami I only got to see

it today , its for the afterparty at night ,

me : kuzawuba ne afterparty ? this dress

is so nice .

I played my fingers touching around it .

Its short & in white & with black on the
botton arm sides , looks tight & its the size
of my body , my moms is also similar to
mine just more longer .

we decided to sit on the couch & get rest ,

our legs are tired & painful , I took my
R850 and placed it on the case of my
phone .
S'bahle : no man , tell me , ubani loya ?
me : muphi ?
S'bahle : uyazi nje ngisho ubani .
me : oh oh , he's my friend .
S'bahle : mngani ?
me : yea .

S'bahle : uyazi umawakho ngo "mngani"

wakho?

me : okay no , he is like my boyfriend ne?

S'bahle : be clear with your words .
me : okay he is my boyfriend & ...

S'bahle : *shocked* Sneee !

me : & I know he looks all old , kodwa love

has no age S'bahle nawe uyakwazi lokho .

S'bahle : mina? ndingenaphi mina ,

andazi lutho ngolove & ages .
me : kodwa cela ungangijaji & uMtho is
not even that old , he is 24 .

S'bahle : twenty - four ?? ay ngeke ,

angithi uyabonake .

me : okay but please don't tell anyone .

S'bahle : you know I won't , ongtshele
kodwa ngampela , lelikhehla lakho .

*we just busted into a huge laugh*

me : akalona ikhehla , igama lakhe

uMthobisi , una24 , he is a taxidriver &
has a few business around my town & we
only started dating like during this week ,
he has been calling me everyday ngaze
ngamqomake , its just that .

S'bahle : mana , so he came all the way

from Jozini to here for you ?
me : I guess so , he came with his other
friends & he left & he is going back there .

S'bahle : ay phela shuthi ukuthanda

ngampelake .

me : just because he came all the way

here?
S'bahle yes hhawu . not alot of men
would've done that .
me : ay makusho wenake .

Insert 10 .
its now 7 pm & my mom had called me to
come wear my dress , it fits very well .
Neliswa & S'bahle came to my mom's
house & we were all dressed into our nice
short dresses , today is my last day here &
I am trying my best to enjoy it , we took
mirror pictures & videos then Thandeka
walked in with her mother's make up &
gave us to put some , we all looked
stunning omg .

music started playing .

me : sebeqalile? asambeni ?
we all walked up & I closed the door , we
were all wearing dresses with tekkies &
Neliswa was wearing hight heels , mrssss
party .

we got to the nice decor & sat on the

chairs , well organised & neatly done . we
drank non-acoholic wine & we were
dancing on piano music . the dj had
played a nice playlist abo "ngixolele by
boohle , isphithiphithi by pabi cooper ,
umsebenzi wethu , zaba istofu ,
emcimbini , etc" some zekethe here &
there & lastly played SETE by ko , young
stunna & blxckie , we all vibed with the
song "certified jolists" , we all related to
the song & it is a very nice song chille .
..........

Its day 6 out of 6 . around 4pm , mom &

gogo are now inside the car & I'm saying
goodbye to my cousins .

S'bahle : manje usuyahamba ngampela .

me : hhawu S'bahle ufuna nghlale?

*we smiled *

Lulama : cela ubuye on June holidays .

Neliswa : please , siyacela .
me : ngizobuya I promise .
Sbonga : it was a very short time kodwa
sizokukhumbula .

Nosipho : kakhulu futhi .

Thandeka : group hug ?
we all hugged for a very long time .
my mom hooted .

me : sesyaqeda .
Sihle : cela usihugga one by one .
I hugged them again .
Neliswa : last group photo .

we made a video of us all laughing & we

just emotional & Lulama started crying .

me : come here .
I gave her a babykiss .

Nosipho : ay nathi syayicela .

Sihle : abanjani abathola ibaby kiss ?

we laughed , I looked at Lulama -

I whispered to her . " I will never forget
that night " she smiled .
me : we will talk on the phone when I get
home , we will keep in touch . I love yall .

them : we love you too . byeee .

I got in the car , my mom driving ,

grandma on the front sit & me in the back
, ngihleli nemthwalo nje emunva cause
iboot ligcwele . I opened the window &
the car took off , they waved hands this is
so sad . I'm going to miss them .

I took my earphones & listened to

catburns on repeat , I was on 16% & we
went for a couple of hours until my mom
stopped at the gas station around 7 pm
(7hour travel) 3 more hours left , she
brought burgers & fried chips with snacks
, filled in her petrol & got back inside the
car .

mom : thatha la , uzungahlanzi emotweni

yami .
me : thanks , angeke .
she continued driving & ugogo was
sleeping , I joined her by then until we got
home .

gogo : sade sabuya emazweni .

me : safely okho nokho .

we got inside & mom closed the garage.

my phone had died on battery so the first
thing I did was charge it , I waited for it to
switch on & I turned on the wifi .
mom : qala uthathe izinto emotweni
before
me : okay , when I'm done besacela
ungboleka nephone yakho .

I took the bags & the suitcase out of the

boot & also took the plastics that had
shoes & cosmetics , placed it in my mom's
room , she was still in the shower ; it
really feels good to be home .

me : goodnight gogo ,
gogo : night sana . *she prayed*

I turned on my phone & finally I have

network , messages got it & my friends
had missed me goshhh . I then had a
facetime with Buhle & Kwanele .

[facetime]

Buhle : you home now ?

Kwanele : nice hairstyleeee geez girl
me : yess I'm home , feels so good . thank
you Kwanele babe .
Buhle : send us pictures ke *noise*

Kwanele : I'm also coming back soon .

Buhle : can we type cause there is noise in

here , I'm in a house party around here .

me : okay , ended call *

I sent my friends the photos & I took my
mom's phone to send more from her , I
went to instagram , facebook so many
messages ; what has been up , I will post
my pictures tommorow during the day .
I tried calling Lulama , S'bahle & Neliswa
but they didn't pick up .

I texted Mthobisi on whatsapp telling him

I'm home now , I guess he is asleep cause
it is very late (11:12pm) .

Insert 11
Its been 2 weeks and days of me &
Mthobisi now , everything is still well and
smooth . I'm still getting to know him
more , ever since I got back from Eastern
Cape , I did meet up with him for about 4
times , he'd come to my neighbourhood &
I'd tell mom/grandma that I'm going to the
store & then me & him would sit in his car
, have a few kisses but I'm still under no
pressure ; he hasn't said anything about
having sex or me visiting his house .

school are opening tommorow , I'm alone

at home & mom went to the mall with
gogo to buy grocceries . I am wearing a
very short skirt & a crop top , with socks ;
its a bit hot today .

Its now around 2pm & I'm sitting here

watching TV while reading a novel on my
phone "beauty beyond the orange
uniform" , I am starving waiting for mom
and gogo to come back with food .

I still have the money that I got that day

ngo mhlakaNeliswa (Neliswa's day) & I
had called them for the past few days , I
do miss them .

my phone rings .
Mthobisi is calling .

[ phone call ]

me : Mvelase .
Mthobisi : uyaphila kodwa mkami .

me : yea ngyaphila , ngilambile ; ngilinde

umama abuye nokudla .

Mthobisi : uma ulambile kungekho

ukudla pho awufoni ngani ungtshele
mina ukuthi ulambile futhi akukho
ukudla , yindaba ungakhulumi nami mina
ngazi ukuthi wena uhleli udlile lapho ,
khuluma nami .

*charmed *
me : ayibo phela Mthobisi angfuni uze
ucathi mina ngumthwala kuwe ...
Mthobisi : umthwalo ? uyaba umthwala
yini uma umuntu ekuthanda , vula
umnyango .

he dropped the call . he sounds a bit angry

though , I took the keys & I left the door
opened . to not even wait for 15 minutes ,
some MrD food guy hooted with his
scooter by my gate & then I had to stand
up & went to open for him .

delivery guy : sawubona , mrs mtshali?

me : yes , but I didn't order anything sir , I

think you got the wrong adress .

delivert guy : do you any Mthobisi

Ndumiso? he ordered this & said I should
make sure it arrives here in less then 20
minutes . *he hands the food paperbags &
a box of romans pizza with 2 blue&purple
powerade drinks*

me : thank you so much .

I took a very deep breathe .

I couldn't believe him , lomuntu

uneymanga , his suprises are always
beyond ; I can't call this romantic , its way
beyond being romantic .

I took my phone & dialed to him .

ringing , ringing , ringing .

voicemail , I dialed again .
ringing , ringing , ringing .
voicemail .

hhawu , I closed & locked the door then I

went to my room & opened to see ba what
do we have here . oh I see a cheesy burger
from Mcdonalds , I see ribs from spur &
the 8 slices of pizza ? I blessed my food ,
said amen & I started digging ! as soon as I
finished , I was so full I drank my energy
drink & walk outside to the big
community bin to put these things in , I
don't want my mom asking me questions I
can't answer .

........

its now 6pm & they are still not back , I

called my mom & her phone went to
voicemail , I'm starting to be worried now
. as I was sitting by the living room , I got
an incoming call from Lulama .

[ phone call ]

Lulama : hey .
me : hello , wait can I ask you something
first ? are you also able to hear or to see
what a person is thinking even through a
phone call .

Lulama : what ? noo .

me : okay cool , ukuphi ?

Lulama : I'm in my room at school since
schools are opening tommorow , are you
good ?

me : yes I am good , I even forgot about

that yazi . I'm alone in the house waiting
for gogo & mom to come back .

Lulama : listen , I called to actually check

up on you , I also want you to know that
I'll also never forget our night , it meant
so much to me , yet I know me & you can
never be something . I want you to know
that even on top of that , you are still the
most beautiful girl I've ever came across ,
the way you do things gets me charmed &
wanting more until then I hope things go
really well between you & Mthobisi , I
hope he never breaks your heart ; we will
meet again in June & I will give you the
best hugss and kisses .

me : girl what ? like I've never been

flattered , thank you so much with
everything you had just said , I promise
we will meet again & we will both hold
onto that night , I love you cuz & I also
hope you do well there in school ; have
someone you will love cause you deserve
it too , I will be good ; we will keep in
touch .

Lulama : thank you , sleep tight .

me : bye , goodnight .

we ended the call , mom's car hooted

outside gate , I got up & opened the door ,
walked to the gate & opened it too .

she drove inside & used the remote to

open the garage , drove inside & I closed
the gate .

me : yazi I tried calling you .

mom : bengidriver phela , sibanjezelwe
itraffic , thatha izinto pha emotweni .

I took the plastics , unpacked them into

their places & mom had brought pizza &
nando's . I made my plate of 3 slices of
pizza & 2 chicken pieces , took my last
powerade in the fridge & walked to my
room , I also closed my door for peace .

I ate & I went on instagram , stalked a few

celebrities after some time I ironed my
uniform , polished my shoes & took a
quick shower . I will go with my braids to
school so I slept with my egdes done
*bonet* to make my egdes dry neatly
through the night .

Insert 12 .
my alarm rang & I woke up , made my
bed & brushed my teeth . I ate cornflakes ,
took a warm bath & wore my uniform .
things done quickly so I could be atleast
early today , Its 5 : 45 , and sengizama
ukubopha igoda elihle , I made a neat bun
.
me : byee .
mom : why uphuma early , you still have
10 minutes ?
me : I want to walk slowly , I love you bye
.
mom : yewena Sne !

I pretended that angimuzwa & closed the

door , walked in slo-motion to the bus stop
. I texted Buhle "morning gal , hope you
are awake by now ; I have a feeling today
will be fun , bring lunch "
she replies "I'm already in the car with my
mom girl , she said she will take me to
school , but text Kwanele , she sure will"

.......

I get to school & I find Buhle waiting for

me by the gate , she is caring textbooks &
a bottle of water . she is even wearing
glasses , eye glasses .
me : ayibo & then?

we hugged really tight & baby kissed .

Buhle : I want to see myself in the top 10

achievers baby girl , your hair does look
nice yazi .

me : uyahlanya wena , idrama engaka !

thank you .

we walked inside the school gate ,

scanned our student cards & walked to
our class .

me : I will brief you in during break

ngoba If I start now then I will not finish .
Buhle : I feel like you are coming to me
with stories that I will not believe .

me : yea maybe . maybe not .

Buhle : no maan , tell me ; now I can't wait
, atleast tell me the topic & then I will wait
for the rest of the story .

me : no , no noooo no . no . you will wait

for ibreak , now lets be serious .

Buhle : ay iwrong lento oyenzayo .

class started & everything was smooth , I

hear by the previous grade 11s that term 2
& 4 are the hardest terms .

bell rings .

its break now , we walked to Kwanele's

class & *hugged* her very tight , she cut
her hair into really short hair (brush size)
& still looks pretty , we walked to the
tuckshop & brought popcorn & small coca
cola drinks .
Buhle : fill us in phela bakithi .
me : okay soooo there's this guy .
Kwanele : iza nazo maan !

me : I'm joking guys there is no ndabas .

Buhle : cha usijwayela kabi .
Kwanele : yazi uyasixhaphaza .
me : ngyadlala hhawu , ukhona uguy , he
will remain anonymous , but for now lets
call him "MB" for now .

Kwanele : mmh MB sounds nice .

I told them about Mthobisi & how

everything is , I didn't tell them his name ,
age & that this guy is not in school .

Buhle : no , we want to know more ,

ufundaphi ?

me : ish , let me also not say that .

Buhle : ngobani?
me : no thats the big suprise .
Kwanele : but we want to know nje , ay
yazini Buhle ? ufunda la eskoleni . I can
feel it that he is in matric khona la .
me : ay qhubekanike nifeele .

Buhle : so nje he really ordered you food

?

Kwanele : mina ngithuswa ukuthi he

came all the way to Eastern Cape ? for you
? uyithathaphi imali engaka ?

me : ay , you guys want everything

ngyasho nje ukuthi he will remain
anonymous .
Buhle : sizomthola , you will post him
soon soon , siyazi .

me : okay *I laughed*

the bell rang & we went back for class ,

had lessons & after school was afterschool
. a boys fight took place right outside the
school gate , I hear they were fighting
over some girl in grade 9 & these guys are
in matric .

* taxi hooted *

is that Mthobisi ? my goshhh this guy ,

now my friends are going to suspect
things .

me : bye guys , my transport is here .

Buhle : transport ??
me : yea . byeee . *I blew a kiss*

I opened the front seat & got in .

me : chille please don't ever do that ,
ngyakcela .
.
I closed the window & kissed his cheek .
Mthobisi : ngenzeni mina ?

he starts the car & plays his maskandi .

me : leyokuzonglanda lana mina ngingazi

, buzaythini ba ndike ndalandwa umama
?

Mthobisi : ngyaxolisake , uyaphila nje

khona ? uyangena awungbingeleli
uzonghlafuna nje .

me : no , its not that ngyakuhlafuna yazi ;

ngyaphila kodwake & ngyabonga kakhulu
ngalento ongenzele yona izolo .

Mthobisi : izinto eyncane lezo *smiles*

usure ukuthi uright?

me : yes hhawu , why wouldn't I ?

Mthobisi : ay bengifuna nje ukuba

nesqiniseko , ufuna siyepheki namhlanje
?

me : home .

I untie my bun & take off my school tie ,

ngikhathele ; the sun is hot & ngiphethwe
ikhanda .

Mthobisi : ayibo , wakhumula pho manje ,

sekwenzenjani ?

I giggled .

me : ayibo angikhumuli , utie

uyanginsinya phela , futhi kunani
mangikhumula ?

Mthobisi : yehheni webantu .

* we both laugh *

me : ngyayidlalela hhawu .
Mthobisi : bekunjanike eskoleni?
me : school was nice , it was okay ; I
actually told my friends about you .

Mthobisi : bathini ?
me : aw bebezothini ?

Mthobisi : angazi phela , futhi

usakhuluma ngaleyondaba , ngifuna
ukukwazisa kubaba manje .

me : Mthobisi ?
I opened my eyes ...

Mthobisi : akuphuthumi phela , ukuthi

Sne ngifuna ukuthi ube umama
wasekhaya , ngampela ngampela bakithi
ntokazi mina ngizifunela wena kuphela ,
bake bathini "for the streets" , angisekho
mina emgwaqeni , sengfuna ukuthatha ,
ngibe nomuntu engizophila naye ngize
ngyongena .

me : okay ngyakuzwa konke lokho but

don't you think its too soon , like its been
only a month and a few days .
Mthobisi : bengifaka umbono wami ,
bengingakuphoqi nawe uyazi .

me : can we wait ngyacela .

Mthobisi : akunankinga mama , ngyazi
futhi nokuthi usamncane ; makumele
ngikulinde uqede neskole ngingakwenza
lokho .

me : ungakwenza ngampela ?

Mthobisi : ngaktshela nje ukuthi

nginesneke mina futhi akukho
okungangenza ngikuzwise ubuhlungu .

me : ngyakwazi lokho , futhi ngyabonga

kakhulu . besacela ungangbeki ekhaya
nqo ngoba khona ugogo , uzongshiya
estobini okungcono .

Mthobisi : nalapho ayikho inkinga ,

masuwehla estolo uthenge oswidi .
he takes out his wallet & gave me R50 .

me : ngyabonga .

he pulled up & I kissed him , I took my bag

& my phone ; and got out the car .

me : byee .
Mthobisi : ngzokufonela .

*goosebumps*

I've never felt so safe , I can't believe I

trust him so much with my life , I never
thought I'd ever allow myself to get inside
a man's car who says he will take me
home njengoba esho . I stand by the
supermarket .

me : ya Zethu .

Zethu is the shop owner , standing by the

door of the shop . ( she is selling from
inside apparently you can't get inside &
take what you want , you just have to
name it & she takes it for you ) .

Zethu : ngyakbuka ne ? wehla emotweni

yendoda yakho .

me : ndoda yami? ayibo . that was a

public transport nje .

Zethu : the kissing pho ?

me : ayibo kahle wena , onake indaba

zakho , cela ungipha ama Oozies awu3 ,
neapple munch .

Zethu : kodwa umuhle kangaka sungaze

ujole nomageza ? cha sis awuyithandi .

me : uzongnika lento engyifunayo or

angeke ?
she gave me what I wanted & I clicked my
tongue , I don't like this , I really don't .
sengvele nganyanya nenhliziyo isincane .

I knocked at Thabiso's house , bought

weed & before I got home my phone rang
.

[ phone call ]
Mthobisi : awukakafiki namanje endlini?
me : sengyangena .
Mthobisi : ubusuhleliphi ?
me : ndawo , sengyangena nje .
Mthobisi : ngyabuza futhi ubusuhleliphi?
me : hawu ndawo nje ngyasho .
Mthobisi : ngikbuze futhi ?
me : chabo . ngibanjezelwe ilosisi
wasestolo kuphela .
Mthobisi : ukubambezele ngani ?
me : aksiyo into etheni , cela ukukfonela
after 5 minutes ?
I dropped the call & continued eating my
apple munch until I got inside the gate .

*I knock*

gogo opens for me .

gogo : ntombiyami .
me : ewe gogo uphilile ?
gogo : ndingaphila kakhulu xa
ndingathola itiya ndilenzelwe nguwe .

me : okay let me go change my uniform .

my phone had alread missed 3 calls from

Mthobisi , I changed my uniform & made
gogo tea .

gogo : enkosi , cela undevulele iradio .

I did that & went to my room .
........

I dialed to him & he answers on first ring .

[phone call]
Mthobisi : mina ngyafona wena uyacima ,
uyicimelani iphone ngoba imina
engifonile?
me : ngyaxolisa .
Mthobisi : cela uphume , ngfuna ukuba
nawe manje .
me : kade unami nje not even 20mins ago
.

Mthobisi : yea ngifuna ukuba nawe futhi .

me : sengizothi ngiyaphi kugogo?
Mthobisi : uzothi gogo ; ngsaya kumngani
wami , ngyabuya kungekdala .

me : muphi lowomngani?
Mthobisi : awunabo abangani Sne ?
me : abekho , baseskoleni kuphela .
Mthobisi : thani uzolanda utie wakho
owukhohlwe kwenye ingane yangakini .
me : ohh , so I must really lie to gogo? fine
, ukuwe ngempela utie ?

Mthobisi : uwushiye emotweni nje .

me : okay , ngizekuphi ?
Mthobisi : egatini lakho .

I wore a jacket maching the skirt that I

was already wearing , I practised my lie &
felt that I was ready .

me : gogo , can I please go fetch my tie ,

ngukhohlwe kuAsanda .

gogo : kutheni uAsanda yena

engawulethi?
me : bayanqaba kubo ba aphume .
gogo : its not safe ntombi & uyayazi .
me : I will be back in only 10 minutes , I
promise .
gogo : khawuleza zungandixabanisi
nomawakho .
me : thank you .

I walked outside the gate & he had parked

on my neighbours side . I got inside & he
was driving , his face was a bit scary ; he
seemed to be mad .
me : siyaphi ?

silence ...
me : Mthobisi ?

oh he is mizing? I took my phone &

pretended to be chatting to Buhle , I
created a fake voice note on whatsapp .

" yo girl , nami ungbuzile & I told him

ukuthi I'm not dating anyone wase
wath...."

Mthobisi : awuthandani namuntu wena?

I cancelled the vn .
me : oh manje usuyangphendula?
Mthobisi : uba lokhuluma naye lapho?
me : muntu .

I switched off my phone .

Mthobisi : yini ngawe namhlanje?
me : yini ngami? ngikubuza kahle ukuthi
siyaphi wena awungphenduli usuthi mina
nginenkinga ?

Mthobisi : mina ngyazi angithi .

me : nami ngicela ukwazi , uphi futhi utie
?

*I look for it under the seat & got it*

Mthobisi : asiyindawo , siyazizulela nje ,

sengizojika mese ngyokubeka kini .
bengfuna ukuba nawe nje noma u10
minutes .
*blushes*
me : imiseke imoto .

he stops the car .

I move from my seat & sit on top of him

with my legs opened , I lower his seat & I
kiss him , his hands move to playfully on
my butt , he pulls my butt part closer to
this diggy do . I FELT IT . I turned him on
& I felt it getting harder . he pulls me
closer again & then I back out , I move
from his seat & I sat back on mine .

me : sungbonileke , besacela ukuya

endlini . *he smiles & laughs*
Mthobisi : manje mina ngoba senginje ?
he means his diggy do .

me : asazike .

he took me home & I get inside with the

tie in my hand .
gogo : ubuthe 10 minutes , kodwa you
took 12 minutes .

me : hhawu *we shared a little laugh*

ngutholile , ngyabonga .

usazongdinga? ngifuna ukuyolala .

gogo : cha , iyolala mntanami .

I went to my room & locked the door , I

took my weed & smoked , I turned on my
fan for the weed smell to vanish (it always
works) . I was so high , I put my uniform
in the washing basket & I listened to my
music on my earphones now since I forgot
my earpods in Eastern Cape , but I don't I
forgot them , I think someone stole them .

*plays good days by SZA*

I think thats when I slept .
Insert 13 .
it has been 2 weeks now , well I had
finally told my friends the truth about
Mthobisi , Buhle judged me ofcourse but
Kwanele was so happy for me . I've learnt
to love him more everyday ; he calls me
everyday & I also see him every day .

I still haven't told him that I smoke , I'm

still scared of his reaction , he seems to be
too strict & I think if he finds out that I
smoke , its either he will force me to stop
or just break up with me . I'm not taking
that risk .

Buhle got back with that girl Aphile .

Kwanele is still dating her Tumelo , Its a
warm saturday , me & my friends are
going to the pool around town .

I'm looking for what to wear right now

cause Buhle , Aphile & Kwanele are
coming to fetch me . Aphile is in our
friendgroup now cause she is always with
us during break time . I actually made
them get back & now they are love birds .

I had told Mthobisi about my plans with

girls & he offered to take us there but I
told him thats its more of a girls day out &
he totally understood .

I called Buhle .

[ phone call ]
me : senikuphi ?

Buhle : sazothatha uAphile then you .

makaBuhle is going to drive us & leave us

in town , fetch us later & drive us to my
house because we are going to have a
girls party sleepover .

me : okay what should I wear ?

Buhle : wear a blue jean , and a crop top ;
do not wear your costume underneath
just bring a plastic with your costume &
some body lotion .

me : okay .

I wore a blue boyfriend jean & my black

crop top from h&m written in a small font
"not just a pretty face" .

I wore my black puma tekkies & my

braids are very old , kwamele ngiqaqe
today .

I told my mom that I'm leaving now .

mom : unayo imali ?

me : yes nginayo .
mom : unamalini ?
me : R600 .
mom : ohh , nizobuya ninike ?
me : before 6 .
mom : okay nihambekahle .
me : thank you bye .

I walked out of her room .

mom : Sne .
me : ma ?
mom : ndyakuthanda yeva ?

It has been close to a year ever since I've

heard my mom say those 2 words .

me : *blushes* ohw , ndyakuthanda nami

sthandwa sami .

mom : the last thing I want to see is you

turn into something njengezontanga
zakho ezilethwa amapolo & skip classes ,
getting pregnant bengenogqibela neskolo
saying uthando lukamama aluzazi & then
go for older men .
me : ndyabulele enkosi nyani ma , I'd
never do all that . I love you too & promise
to take care of myself nokuthi ngziphathe
kahle .

*car hooted*
me : I think thats Buhle's mom .
mom : mandize nami ndizobulisa .

I said goodbye to gogo & we both walked

out nomama , I greeted & also got inside
the car .

mom : molo sis .

Buhle's mom : yebo sis ninjani?
mom : sikhona , singeva ngakini .
Buhle's mom : nathi siyaphila , ey
lezingane ezihleli zifuna ukuba
sebumnandini .

mom : ndiqgibelothetha naye maan ,

mabaziphathe kahle labantu , bahle
bamsulwa ; abangazisondezi
kwezinkwenkwe ezingezubenzelanto .

Buhle's mom : I hope niyezwa lapho .

us : *giggles* siyezwa .

mom : kophela ukuhleka khona lokho .

*we laughed again*

we said goodbye & we drove off , talking

in the car until we got to the pool , Buhle's
mom paid for our entrance .

Buhle's mom : call me if you have any

problem .
Buhle : okay ma , thanks .

we waved hands & got inside to change

into our costumes , we all wore bikinis ,
laid neatly a throw & put our snacks
down . we then took pictures , went live
on instagram & posted our pictures .
we were still swimming while Aphile was
sitting on the throw with Buhle .
Buhle : Sne , your phone is ringing .
me : who is it ?
Buhle : I think its pretty obvious .
me : okay answer it .

I got out of the pool & walked to them .

[phone call]

me : babazi .
Mthobisi : sthandwa senhliziyo , uthe
ukuphi konje ?
me : Jozini town caraco pool .
Mthobisi : uright lapho?
me : ehhe ngiright ba , wena ?
Mthobisi : makuright wena nami ngikahle
.
bengikubheka , uzobuya
ngaskhathini ?.
me : before 6 , I don't think I can see you
today yazi .
Mthobisi : zingphatha kabike lezoyndaba .
angizizwa nje kahle .

me : uzongbona ksasa , this day really

means much for me & my girls .

Mthobisi : ayy kulungile , ngyakuthanda

yezwa ?
me : ngyakthanda nami ba . enjoy the of
your day .

* I hang up *
Buhle : uthini ? cela ustshela .
me : ayibo uthanda indaba , wozani
sizobhukuda phela , nilibe nihleli nje la
niyajola .
Aphile : sizoza , cela usishiye nomuntu
wami bakithi .

they really look happy together , I'm glad I

made them fixed things . I went back to
swimming with Kwanele , around 3 pm
we packed our things & wore back our
clothes & left the pool .

Kwanele : where are we going now ?

me : I don't know , but we have to eat I'm
starving .
Aphile : I know a place that has
everything .
me : where's that ?

Aphile : Achro Mama's .

Kwanele : oh yea that new place near
spur , its opened now ?
Aphile : It opened yesterday .
Buhle : how are the prices ?
Aphile : a bit expensive .
me : asambeni siyekhona .

we walked to Achro Mama's & got a table ,

this place is so full cause its still new ;
they sell burgers , fried chips , meat beef ,
pork & chicken & they also have pizza .
me : what do we order ?
Kwanele : everything here looks delicious
.
Aphile : I can't even decide .
Buhle : I know what I want .
me : I will just have the pizza & the ribs .
Aphile : I will have the burger & frieds .
Buhle : I'm taking the ribs and frieds

Kwanele : I'm ordering everything ,

okusalayo I'm going to take it home .

we laughed & called the waiter , she took

our orders & we had to wait for about 25
minutes .

me : yooo I'm starving .

Aphile : 18 more minutes .
me : 18? goshhhh .
we finally got out food & started digging
in , I was so full , I also had cocacola &
then we were done we went to H&M , I
wanted to buy a hoodie for myself .

me : H&M?
Buhle : yea lets go there .

they were holding hands & with Aphile , I

was holding hands with Kwanele , we
were walking infront of them & then we
got to H&M , I looked for a garfield hoodie
& got it at R399.99 , I took it to the till &
when we were done we called Buhle's
mom to come fetch us .

we got home & they all got in , mom &

gogo welcomed all off them .

mom : please feel at home .

we walked to my room & they placed

their bags on the floor , we all sat on my
bed & sent the photo's that we took by the
pool .

me : can you guys please unplait my hair

?

they agreed & I sat down , my braids were

so long & I just hope inwele zami
aziqothukanga , baqeda mese bangigeza
futhi , they blowdried my hair & said it
has grown .

Buhle : I actually see the difference .

me : ngampela ?
Kwanele : yeah , please get used to having
your hair done , it helps it to grow .
me : thats hard but okay .
Aphile : cela mina ukukluka mina
isnuphu .
me : you can ?
Aphile : yea I can .
me : okay Buhle don't be jelous , she is just
doing my hair nothing much .

Buhle : you remember telling us about

your cousin Lulama? naye she started
with just doing your hair .

we all laughed & made so much noise .

me : but this is differeeeent hhawu .
Aphile : bathong baby , I'd never do the
same mistake twice .
Kwanele : its just hair guys , its not that
deep .

we laughed again . mom knocked & got in

.
mom : do you girls want icecream ?
me : yes please .
mom : its in the defreezer , I'm going to
sleep now , zekhulile ezoznwele zakho ,
kwamele uzejwayeze ukuqhina .
Buhle : we were telling her the same thing
ma , akafuni ukuzwa .

mom : shuthi uzogundake phela .

we laughed & I swept the hair around my

room , mom went to sleep & gogo also
went pray & slept. arond 10 : 02 pm , we
went to take the whole icecream with 4
spoons & went back to watch TV .

Buhle : open a movie or something .

she was in one couch cuddling with

Aphile while me & Kwanele on the other
couch sharing the icecream .

my phone has been vibrating in the couch

between me & Kwanele but I kept on
ignoring it cause I knew it was Mthobisi &
I knew if I answered it then all eyes would
have been on me .
Kwanele : yazi inescefe lephone ,
oyibambi ngani ?

me : ngyibambe ?
all of them : yesssssss .

[ phone call ]
me : hello ?
Mthobisi : ulele yini ?
me : no , my phone was in the other room
, xolo ba .

......
kwanele made a fake cough*
me : ssshh .
......

Mthobisi : ay mina angikwazi ukulala

ngingakubonile , ngfuna ukukbona .
me : okay we can just facetime ?
Mthobisi : ay angifuni mina lokho nginga'
phandle la kwegate lakho .
me : NGAPHANDLE KWEGATE ?

all my friends looked at me , Buhle had

the remote & she paused the movie that
was playing so they all focus on me me .

Mthobisi : cela uphume noma imizuzu

emibili nje , ngyacela mama .

I kept quiet .

Mthobisi : sthandwa sami .

me : okay mana .
I dropped the call .

me : so guyssss *desperate eyes*

Buhle : no .
me : hawu ngyacela , its only for a few
minutes , ngyangcenga .
Buhle : what if your mom wakes up ?
me : she won't .
Kwanele : ay Sne , I don't want your mom
thinking that we are bad influences , she
really trusted us ngoba sila ....

me : Aphile ?
Aphile : you want me to do what ?
me : you just going to stand by my moms
room , if she wakes up & opens her door
you are going to try and stop her , talk to
her & tell her that the TV is making noise .

Buhle : Aphile ungayvumi leyonto .

Aphile : usekhulumileke umuntu wami .
me : ay fuseg wena Buhle , fuseg .

I was a bit angry , I stood up & unlocked

the door silently to not make noise .

Buhle : cela usivalela , siyagodola .

I looked at her .

I then went to the gate , It is very cold , I'm

wearing a very short night dress & its
revealing too much skin .

I saw his car showing lights , I opened the

gate again silently to not make noise .

he got out of the car & hugged me .

me : uyayibona izinto ongenzisa zona?
Mthobisi : ngyaxolisa kakhulu , khona
into engikphathele yona

he took out a small giftbag & he smiled ,

he gave it to me .

Mthobisi : ungayvuli la , uzoyvula endlini .

me : okay , sengyahambake .
I hugged him again & he pulled my butt
area towards his diggy do & he kissed my
forehead .
Mthobisi : ngikuthanda ngayo yonke .
me : nami ngyakthanda Mnisi .
I walked back quickly to the gate & closed
it , I then went back inside .

Buhle : usindile .
Aphile : hhaa , what do you have there ?
Kwanele : asidle mngani wethu .
me : ey aningyekeni nina .
I took my phone & said goodnight .

I went to my room , ngashuqula & opened

my gift ; he brought me a heart necklace ,
pure silver & a note written in cassive
font .
“ 𝓾𝔃𝓸𝓱𝓵𝓮𝔃𝓲 𝓾𝓼𝓮𝓷𝓱𝓵𝓲𝔃𝔀𝓮𝓷𝓲 𝔂𝓪𝓶𝓲 𝓼𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓭𝔀𝓪 𝓼𝓪𝓶𝓲 ,
𝓷𝓰𝓲𝓴𝓾𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓭𝓪 𝓷𝓰𝓪𝓴𝓱𝓸 𝓴𝓸𝓷𝓴𝓮 𝓸𝓴𝔀𝓪𝓶𝓲 ”.
( you will forever be in my heart , I love
you with everything that I have ) .

I blushed my eyess out , I have never felt

so safe & love , a person who shows me
love with everything that he has , I am
proud to say that I am inlove with him ,
I'm feeling things that I've never really
felt before ; if he is not my soulmate then
he is the reason I might never fall inlove
ever again .

Insert 14
2 months have passed now , Its term 2
exams now , this term has been really
hard , I hated every chapter of every
subject . I finally took the decision to now
always have my hair done . things for me
& Mthobisi have been going very well ,
stilI the same guy I fell inlove in with , I'm
coming back from school & in the taxi
rank to meet up with him .

me : sanibona .

I greet some taxi drivers .

man 1 : awu kodwa mabhebheza . awuze

la ngithi manqa .
me : besacela ukubuza ukuthi akaze
nimbone uMthobisi .

man 2 : iyona bafo lengane ethandana

noMthembu.

man 1 : sondela phela .

he pulls my hand really hard .

me : congiyeka , cela ungiyeka ; kanti yini

inkinga yakho ?
I start to want to cry ....

Mthobisi : kwenzekalani la?

man 1 : awu yini manje wena ?
Mthobisi : ngithi kwenzekalani lana? Zulu
, tshelani mina phela , niyenzani lengane
?
man 1 : besizincokolela nayo .

Mthobisi : nincokola nincokola ini?

ningazongidakelwa umsunu wenhloko le
eniyfubela usuku lonke la erank ,
niyezwa?

people at the rank were looking at them .

man 1 : ey awuphole wena mfana ,

uyasphazamisa
he looks at me ....
man 1 : ngithe woza la phela swirathi .

Mthobisi went towards him & gave him a

very hot slap , the guy fell down & he
kicked him several times on his private
area

Mthobisi : niyeke ukungijwayela

amasimba .

he looked at me . he calmed down ...

Mthobisi : ukahle mkami? uright?
abakulimazanga ?
I was angry at him , I just looked at him &
walked away crying .

Mthobisi : mama ? uyaphi manje .

he followed me ... buya , woza sokhuluma
emotwenike sthandwa sami .

he was so loud people kept on looking at

him , he was causing a scene .

I looked at him & we got inside in one of

his taxis , he closed the door .

me : did you have to do that?

Mthobisi : ngenzani? ngokukuvikela ?
me : you just caused a scene & call that
protecting , ushaya umuntu wabantu uze
umlimaze his private part , ubukisa ngaye
ngenxayokuthi he was holding my hand ?

Mthobisi : ubuyijabulela lento abeyenza

kuwe? ubuzothini ukube angifikanga?
me : uba obethe bengijabula? wena
usungaze umlimaze? ubengabamba noma
ubani isandla .

Mthobisi : ey awuyena unoma ubani

wena maan , uwumfazi wami ,
awuzukuhamba uthintwa yiyoyonke
imvucu yala erank , ubuzekuba la erank?

me : bengize kuwe .
Mthobisi : manje pho ?
me : lutho , ngyabonga ngokungivikela
kodwa ngyacela next time cela
uyiphathise okwendoda , ay lento
oyenzile .

Mthobisi : nawe uyangcasula ,

uyangicasula nawe , nangokuzayo
ngakufica bekubambe kanje , akukho
okuhlukile engiyokwenza ngaphandle
ngokumthatha lowomuntu ngimbeke
phansi , ngimshaye , uyangizwa ?

I just started to cry , I've never seen the

violent side of his , I just needed to be
alone , I didn't know he can be such an
animal .

me : ngyakuzwa .
Mthobisi : ubhalekanjani ?

he started the car .

me : kubhalekile .
Mthobisi : siyaphi manje ?
me : angazi , kodwa angifuni ukuba
sekhaya .

I whipped my tears .

Mthobisi : uke wadla ?

me : yea ngidlile , asambeni nathi sobona
where the road takes us .

Its now 1: 13 pm , basidelile early

ngenkathi siqeda ukubhala , I have to be
home at atleast 3 : 30pm .
he played some maskandi on his radio a
song that goes "ngahlangana nentombi
emhlophe idriver umercedes ngavele
ngaycela uthando , yavele yangnika" & he
kept on checking me out .

I took my phone & texted my girls , I told

them I'm going to Mthobisi house .

[ group chat ]
Buhle : to do whatttt ?
Kwanele : typing ....
Aphile : ayibo ntombo .
Kwanele : you frs or uyazidlalela?
me : I'm serious .

I switched off my phone & looked at him .

me : can go to your house ?
he looked at me .
Mthobisi : ufuna ukuya kwami ?
me : yea , I've never been there , why not
?
Mthobisi : *laughs* kunonkosikazi wami
laphana neyngane zami .
me : *laughs out loud* akunankinga
asambeni .

Mthobisi : kulungileke .

he was joking , he lives alone , he told me

his father lives very far away from Jozini .

we arrive & he has an average a 6 rooms -

house . 2 bedrooms , a bathroom , kitchen
, living room & a dining room .

we got there & he opened the gate with a

remote , he drove inside .

Mthobisi : wamukelekile kwaMnisi ,

oMvelase abahle .

me : you really live alone ?

Mthobisi : yebo .

we got inside , I think his house is very

nice . I'm still wearing my school uniform
& this is all new to me , I'm a bit scared .
then I was about to take my school shoes
off ...

Mthobisi : ungayikhumuli .
I took them off anyways .

his tiles are pure white & his house smells

like him , he has a flatscreen with sofas ,
his kitchen is so clean & neat .

me : are you sure you live alone?

Mthobisi : hawu , ungabaziswa yini?

me : when do you get time to clean all
this?
Mthobisi : ekseni mangvuka nje .
I jumped to sit on his kitchen counter &
looked at him hoping he was going to
complain .

Mthobisi : khululeka , kukwakho nawe la

.

he came towards me & got his waist inside

my legs , we kissed for some time & I
pulled his t-shirt & continued kissing him ,
he pulled my butt closer & he carried me
to one of the bedrooms , I had my legs
around his back , continued kissing & he
tossed me into his bed .

he takes off his t-shirt , gets on top of me &

kissed me , he moved to my neck I was
heavily breathing ...

me : Mthobisi mana , mana .

he backed off as fast as possible .

Mthobisi : sthandwa sami .

me : akaze , akaze ngayenza .
Mthobisi : uthini kimi mkami ?
me : I've never really had sex before .
Mthobisi : uthi sayitshitshi ?
he giggles .

me : yes ... uhlekani?

I smile too , a feeling of relief .

I sit properly .

Mthobisi : angihleki yazi sthandwa sami ,

ngibuka ukuthi ukhathazwa yini ngoba
phela into enhle kabi leyo .

me : inhle ngampela ?
Mthobisi : kakhulu .

he just became so calm , I felt that maybe

he is worth taking it .
Mthobisi : ubungathanda ukuthi ngenze
njani mina ma ?

me : ngfuna uqhubeke .
Mthobisi : ngiqhubeke ?
me : uqhubeke .
we both laugh & he broke the laugh with a
kiss , I love the way he moves his hands
around my body .

I also took off my jersey & unbuttoned my

shirt , slowly looking deep into his eyes ,
gorrrdddddd what am I doing .

the process was too long until he took off

my skirt & pullled me closer to the edge of
the bed , he made my legs so weak , my
whole body weakening . ngaze ngaynikela
kuye , so many things were going on in
mind & all I was into was him .

Mthobisi : unesqiniseko sokuthi uyafuna

siyenze lento .
me : nginesqiniseko .

Mthobisi : meke ngalifaka la , wazi ukuthi

uzohlezi ungowami , angeke kusashitsha .

I couldn't believe this guy omygod .

Mthobisi : uzozwa ubuhlungu kodwa

kancane ay kakhulu yezwa ?

I nodded , he inserts it very slowly ; I felt

my whole world , my paradise opened up
, it felt so painful but also felt inside
paradise .

I let a soft "mmh" out , I was moaning ...

*removed*

he was done & we both cuddled in his bed

& my blood was in his bed sheet .

me : buka .
Mthobisi : asambeni syogeza ,
ngzoylungisa lento .

we both walked to his shower , he ran the

water in the shower .
me : my hair ? awunawo uplastic ?
Mthobisi : masisuka la uzohamba uyoluka
esalon kabusha mese ngzokuyisa eskhaya
. me : that will waste time though ,
nomama will notice that its new .

we both got inside the shower & we were

kissing while showering .

when we were done , we got out & I wore

my uniform , Its now 4 : 27pm ; he is
driving me home .

me : I love you bye .

Mthobisi : ngyakuthanda nami ,
ngzokufonela .
I took my bag & my phone , entered my
gate & got inside the house , its now 5 : 12
shit my mom is home .

mom : iskole siphume nini ?

me : ngo 3 .
mom : okay , ndak'buza futhi . iskole
siphume nini ?

me : iskole siphume ngo 3 .

she slapped me really hard I fell on the

floor .

mom : uBuhle was here with her mom

ngo half pass 2 , they were here to give
you your textbook that you left in your
class , uqgibelophuma eskoleni wayaphi?
nabani ?

me : ngyaxolisa mama

I started crying .
mom : uphumaphi ? ngeyiphi lataxi that
drops a person on their gate ?

me : mama ngyaxolisa , I'm sorry .

in tears & crying .

mom : no , musuthi "I'm sorry" . tshela

mina uphumaphi , nabani ?

I cried so loud I want my grandma to feel

sorry for me & make my mom let me go .
gogo : ay nawe Zenathi (my moms name)
muyekele , ingane lena osuybetha kanje .

mom : sapha lephone .

I give it to her .
mom : yivule , unlock it .
me : ngyaxolisa ma , ndiceluxolo .
mom : ndzakuphinda , sundiqhela vula
lephone .
I took it and held it tight .

me : angeke ngikwazi .

I put my hands on my face cause I know

another slap is coming .

mom : vula lephone okanye

uyandiphumela ngomnyango ubuyela
pha ophuma khona .

I cry out loud again .

me : mama ngyacela , gogo please do

something ngyacela .

I was crying my lungs out .

gogo : Sne , uba uyayazi ba akukhonto

oyifihlayo , yivule iphone .
me : I can't , ma kuba uthi mandivule
iphone that you are violating my right to
privac....

mom : ey ey ey , uyayazi uphambene?

uyayazi ba apha enhloko uphambene
nyan ! ndizakuqhwaba ngenye impama ,
ndithe ba awufuni ukuyvula lephone ,
phuma ubuyela pha ophuma khona .

me : nami ngyaxolisa ma . ngyakucela .

I kneeled down & she slapped me again &
looked at me .

me : ma ngyaxolisa ngokungakuhloniphi ,
angeke ngiphinde ngiyenze lento
engiyenzile .

mom : woza kumama .

we hugged .
mom : sssh thula phela baby .

yo I hated my mom for doing this .

I backed out & I walked to my room
crying , I then changed finally to my
pjamas , I had to use the toilet to pee , *my
underwear had blood* shit kanti whats
the date today , ohh no , I read in some
book that if its your first time then you
bleed like you on your period . I took a
bath & a pad & after that I went to my
mom's room .

me : ma , mama .
she was sleeping .
mom : mmmh .*eyes closed*
I kissed her face & also went to sleep .

Insert 15 .
a week later .

I still haven't told my friends that

Mthobisi broke my virginity , I explained
to them how I got into trouble & Buhle felt
that it was her fault but it has passed now
, mom still onto suspecting things but has
no proof of anything .

I'm writing my last exam today , mom had

cooked ujeqe nenyama yangaphakathi
last night , I know its Mthobisi's favourite ,
so ekseni before I left for school I packed
some lunch for him . as early as I was , I
just used a taxi so I can suprise him erank
.

[ taxi rank ]
I got out of the taxi & already in the
morning the rank is so full . I walked
towards where he usually stands..... oh my
god , my heart just skipped a beat ,
Mthobisi , its him . he is standing with
another girl from my school , he was
leaning his hand around her , looks like
he is begging for a kiss .

I dropped the lunchbox ...

me : *calm voice* Mthobisi .

my heart was beating fast , looked at me .

I just felt tears falling out of my eyes , I
walked away & he kept on following me .
he called me & I finally stopped .

me : what do you what from me ?

tears falling .

Mthobisi : ngiyaxolisa , angyithandi

leyantombazane , ngithanda wena .

I slapped his face & he held my hands .

Mthobisi : ngilalele , ngibheke mangithi

angyithandi leyangane , bekungamele
uyibone lento ebiyenzeka , bengingeke
ngiyenze lutho .

me : cela ungyeka , yekela izandla zami .

I called an uber to take me to school & I

got there late , people were going to their
exam rooms , my eyes were red & my face
was messy through all the crying .

..........

exam finished , I was so quiet I wanted to

be alone , my friends came to me .
Buhle : uright ?

a tear fell down . I whipped it quickly

thinking they didn't see .

me : yea ngiright .

Kwanele : you can't lie to us & you know

that , what is wrong ?

Aphile : khuluma nathi , we are here for

you .

they all nodded .

Buhle : is it your mom again ?

more tears were falling down cause I

couldn't stop thinking about all this .

Kwanele : Sne siyacela phela . talk to us .

Aphile : we don't like seeing you like this .
me : I am okay , can we go & buy .
Buhle : are you even going to eat ? if you
don't talk to us then uzotshela bani ?

Kwanele also started shedding tears , we

stood up & got to the tuckshop . Kwanele
went to buy & we waited for her by the
line , oh there is this girl , she seems to be
in grade 10 , I looked at her & she looked
at me with her friends and laughed .

me : Buhle , I'm about to do something I

never thought I'd ever do .

Buhle : whats that ?

me : hold my bag , Aphiwe hold here .
I took of my earings .

I walked to her & pushed her towards the

wall , I gave her several slaps & when I
was hitting her face ! I made sure .

people were looking & taking videos ,

prefects stopped us & the whole school
was laughing . we were sent to the
principals office , we gave in our parents
numbers .

"yes , is this the parent of Snezintombi

Mtshali , please come to the school as
soon as possible" & again "am I talking to
the parent of Andiswa Nyawo , yes can
you get to her school as soon as possible"

I was still angry even by the office & then

we were waiting in the receptionists office
.

my mom walked in first & gave me that

"what have you done now" look . she went
to the clerk & the clerk told her to wait a
bit . Andiswa's mom walked in after a few
minutes , we were all directed to the
principals Office .

principal : goodday , I am sad that you

were rushed to come here & torelate such
a stupid matter , these 2 were found
fighing in the school premises , I will now
give them a chance to explain their sides .
start .
he points at Andiswa .

Andiswa : I was standing by the tuckshop

with my friends & this girl suddenly
attacked me , she pushed me & physically
bullied me , I also tried hitting her back
but she was too furious she kept on
atfacking me . I don't know what I did .

principal : your turn

he points at me .
I just kept quiet & just started to cry , I
have no reason that they will understand .
I continued crying for about 10 minutes .

principal : you have wasted so much time

shedding crocodile tears , I think we all
have other things to be doing then sitting
here and looking at you cry .

I looked at my mom , she doesn't deserve

all this that I'm doing to her .

I kept quiet .

principal : I have no choice but to suspend

you for 2 weeks , your suspension will
start on the first 2 weeks when schools
open , ma'am please sign here .

she left her signature & I left mine too .

when we walked out of the office , Buhle ,
Aphile & Kwanele were waiting for me by
the door , with my belongings (bag &
earrings)
me : thanks , we will talk on the phone .
they hugged me .

walking outside the school gate to my

moms car , there he is . Mthobisi has his
car parked there . I clicked my tongue & I
got inside my mom's car .

she was driving & the car was so quiet , I

took my phone & earphones in my bag ,
33 missed calls from Mthobisi & 43
messages on whatsapp from "Mvelase
wami" . I ignored that cause I wanted to
play music in peace .
.
lets see : beyoncé - best thing I never had ,
catburns - go , ariana - no tears left to cry ,
billie eillish - everything I wanted & also
played young stunna , aymos & mas
musiq sengzwile .

we are 10 minutes away from home .

mom : Sne yini inkinga yakho .
I didn't hear her because the music was
too loud .

mom : Sne .
me : ma ?
mom : ungiphoxelani ?

I kept quiet & looked at her .

mom : u ngi pho xelani ?
me : angnaso isizathu .
mom : uzoba naso mese sifika endlini ,
ngiknika lesiskhathi ukuthi size sifike
endlini , usazochaza .

I put back my earphones & Mthobisi

called again , I just went on whatsapp &
blueticked him , blocked him on whatsapp
, blocked on messages & also blocked him
on calls . I hate myself for even trusting
him . I was still crying but silently .
we get home & I go to the bathroom , I
text my friends & I tell them that I've been
suspended .

mom : vula lomnyango , phuma la !

Ignore her & continue typing .

[ group chat ]
me : obviously I think my mom is going to
take my phone , if you guys can , can you
please come to my house ksasa . I love yall
. < 33333 .

Buhle : I will come , we love you too .

Kwanele : typing ....
Aphile : we love you tooo .

my mom kept on banging the door .

gogo : yintoni kengoku ?
mom : vula lomnyango Sne ngingaze
nginyanye .

me : mom okho ndiceluxolo , please don't

hit me . ngyakucela tohho .

mom : I'm giving you one last chance yoba

uvule lomnyango , sbhanxa
sentombazane .

gogo : eyantoni isjambok ? ufuna

ukubulala lomntana kengoku .

isjambok ? I was so scared I cried so much

, I knew it was about to go down .

she pushed the door ...

me : okay okay , sengyavula .

ngavula & thats when everything

happened so fast , I was crying & she was
hitting my whole body & it was so painful
, gogo had just watched & didn't do
anything .

me : mama ngenzeni ? cekuxolo .

I was crying so bad , not only because my
mom will give me a hiding , only because
of Mthobisi & what he did to me .

she stops ...

mom : yini le ? yini le engyifice ngaphansi

kwebhedi yakho , uhhuqa insangu ,
uyisdwedwe sentombazane Sne , ulethwa
imoto engingazazi , ufika ngeskhathi
othanda ngaso , you fight eskolweni
kwelangoku & suyabhema nokubhema !
you have everything you want . I do
everything for you mntanami what more
do you want *crying*

she found my weed , meaning she was

going through my stuff in my room .

I looked at gogo & she clicks her tongue .

she continues to hit me & gogo comes
with a big leather belt & joins my mom
too .
they both gang up against & I begged
them to stop but they didn't listen .

the following day .

I am depressed , under alot of pressure I

am alone in the house , wearing my white
puma tracksuits with a bennie & socks
matching the black bennie . mom &
grandma had just left for a ladies meeting
in church , they will be back in the night &
right now its 12 : 09 pm . I am waiting for
atleast one of my friends to come .

mom took my phone yesterday after

giving me a hiding , her and gogo are not
talking to me & I still haven't eaten this
whole day .
I'm not used to not having my phone with
me , I miss Mthobisi . I feel incomplete
without him & I know he misses me too , I
really want to hear him explain because I
know there is a better explain to all this .
I'm weak for him now , he is all I want ; I
failed my ownself when I gave him my
virginity , even though I don't regret it . It
was worth everything he has done for me
. argh why am I even thinking about him ,
he is probably with Andiswa ( the girl I
fought with ) he loves Andiswa now & I
just need to accept all that .

someone is making noise with the gate

locker , I stood up & looked by the door ,
Its Buhle & Aphile , Buhle was holding a
big teddy bear & Aphile had 4 giftbags .

I smiled & my heart felt peace , I opened

for them & they jumped onto hugging me
.
me : niyangthunuka *I smiled*
Buhle : oh no, sorry . ukhona umawakho?
me : no akekho , lets go . Kwanele ?
Aphile : no , we passed by her house &
she said couldn't come , she wanted to but
she has flu but !
me : but what ?
Aphile : she got you this ...

we walked in & then I told them the whole

story & how everything started & what
really happened . I was even crying again
.

me : I really wanted to tell you guys but I

didn't know how , I am very sorry , I
showed them where I still have sjambok
marks , my whole body is painful .

Buhle : look Sne , we are your friends , we

won't be judging you right now when you
need us the most , I'm still lost here , when
did the sex part happen?

me : that day I told you I was at his house .

Buhle & Aphile : Ohhhhh !

me : yea , I'm also disappointed in my
ownself , I really don't know what got into
me . you still love me right ?

Buhle : look at me now , virgin or not ,

you are still our bestfriend .
we laughed ...

Aphile : okay so that means you &

Mthobisi are now over & done ?

me : you can also say that .

Aphile : well , yesterday afterschool ,

when you left he was there with his car &
told us to give this teddy & this gift to you .

me : he did ? why is he doing all this .

Buhle : I suggest you open the giftbag .

me : did you guys open it yet?

Aphile & Buhle : nooo , nope noo .

me : mmh .
they laughed ...

I open , there is roché , a small box of

expensive chocolate , I opened the other
box & there was a small picture of me &
him that we took ngomhlakaNeliswa ; in
the Eastern Cape the first time we kissed .
& a letter written ....

“ themba lami , ngifuna wazi ukuthi

uwena ozohlezi usenhlizweni yami ,
uwena umuntu wesifazane owokuqala
engamthanda ngiqala ukumbona ,
ngyaxolisa ngaleliphutha elenzekile ,
ngiyacela , ngyangcenga galela
mawuzokwazi ukuthola ithuba ,
sikhulume futhi ukwazi ukungizwa .
ngiyakuthanda ngakho konke okwami ,
MaMthembu wami omuhle ” .
I couldn't help it but blush .
Buhle : sweet ne ?
me : yea , kodwa I don't want to put
myself into shit again . can you borrow
me your phone ?

I took Aphile's phone & dialed his number

, I knew it by head , thats how obsessed I
was with him .

ringing .

[ phone call ]
Mthobisi : ngikhuluma nobani ?

I smiled that I heard his voice .

me : Mthobisi .
Mthobisi : Sthandwa sami , uwena lo ?
me : ngizokunika ithuba lokhuthi uchaze .
Mthobisi : awu abakithi basangibhekile
abakithi ; ngikuchazele kuphi ma , ufuna
ngize lapho ?
me : yea , estobhini sami , cela uzame
ukushesha .

Mthobisi : ngiyindlela khona manje .

I dropped the call & asked my friends to

go with me & then helped me close the
door * locked the house . we all walked to
the bus stop & I saw his car from a
distance .
Buhle : sokulinda estolo .

me : ngyabonga

I took a deep breathe .

he stopped & opened the door for me , I

got inside , folded my arms

me : ngikunikeza u2 minutes , uzochaza

masuqedile ngiyaphuma mina .
Mthobisi : ngyajabula nokuzwa iphi...
me : Mthobisi ?
Mthobisi : leyangane yasuke yangifensa ,
yasuke yazidlulisa eduze kwami ifuna
ngyinake , yangbuka ngelinye inhlo ...

me : ilento obuthi ufuna ukuychaza .

I open the door , he holds my arm .
Mthobisi : ngyakucela , ngiyakungcenga .
me : khuluma iqiniso phela , yeka amanga
, uyangbo nginjani ngenxayakho? *I take
off my jacket to show him the bruises*

Mthobisi : ubani okwenze nje ?

me : cela ukhulume , angfuni ukuysola
ngokuza la .

Mthobisi : ngibheke , leyangane ngampela

yayidlulisa eduze kwami amajita aserank
angibheja ukuthi uma ngingaythola
leyangane azongvuma .
me : usawenzela ukuimpressa amajita
namanje ? I thought you said you were
done for the streets & wanted something
serious , I thought you wanted me & only
me ... I start to cry .

Mthobisi : namanje
me : ey thula Mthobisi , thula
I try to wipe my tears .

Mthobisi : Sne . ngisafuna wena namanje ,

ngifuna wena kuphela , angeke
ngikuthembiss izulu nomhlaba kodwa
ngikuthembisa ukuthi angeke ngiphinde
ngizinike ithuba lokungakuhloniphi ,
ngithembisa ukuthi ngizohlezi ngifuna
uthando lwakho alukho olunye ,
bengiyacela ungiphe ithuba lokugcina
ngyakucela sthandwa senhliziyo yami .

me : cela ukuphinde ngyicabangisise lento

, ngizobuyela kuwe mese ngikahle , ngazi
nokuthi ngingakwazi yini ukukthemba
futhi , angisanayo nephone ngoba umama
uyithathile , ngalwa noAndiswa eskoleni
kuyimanje I'm suspended , bangishaya
nogogo izolo ebsuku mese bathatha
nephone .

Mthobisi : iphutha lami lonke leli ,

ngizozenza izinto zibuyele esmeni .
ngyakuthanda kakhulu ma .

me : okay . ngyabonga ngokuthi uzile la .

I opened the door & got out .
he also drove off & I called my friends
told them we can go now .

we get home I thanked my friends for the

gifts & the support , I decided to sleep
after they had left .

“umkhuleko , umkhuleko .
unamandla , uma sikhuleka ,
ngikukholwa ; ngokukholwa
uJesu ulalela ,
aphendulu'mkhuleko .
letha konke kuJesu ngomkhuleko”.

close to 16 people from church walked in

singing & woke me up , they are all
coming from the ladies group , ihhee this
is making me laugh because now all these
people are here to pray for me .

mom : woza wena , guqa la phansi .

I was scared & did as she had said .

they all started laying their hands on my
head & they were praying . “ awaphuma
lamademon ! ”. they were all saying
different things at the same time , I can't
believe my mom went to church to
embarass me like this & told all these
women that I have demons .

I was crying & one said “ musa ukukhala ,

usathane uzojabula , awaphume
lamademoni ”.
when they were done wasting their time
because I had no demons , they all went &
I locked myself in my room . I cried
myself again to sleep .

Insert 15 .

July holidays are almost over , I still don't

have my phone & I had asked mom to
visit Eastern Cape so I can atleast be with
Lulama , S'bahle or Neliswa and the
others but she said no . I have also been
grounded , I can't even go to the tuckshop
or the mall apparently if I go to tuckshop
they say that means I'm going to buy
weed . mom had took all my money & my
card . she also stop letting my friends visit
me . I have been depressed & I also
wanted to kill myself but I just don't have
the courage to do that .
Its a warm Thursday afternoon , I am
watching TV & mom at work , gogo is
reading the bible while drinking tea .

I am wearing a miniskirt and I have my

legs up the sofa & my back on the seat ,
upside down watching the show catfish .

gogo : oke nje uhlale kahle , ivale imlenze

, uziqoqe njengentombazane .

I looked at her .

me : I've been sitting like this for close to

15 minutes & you are only telling me now
to sit properly . ay ay .

I just stood up & switched off the TV &

went to my room & banged (closed) the
door . I used to love ugogo more then
mom but now they are both the same , If
only I had the courage to actually kill
myself ; I would & leave them 2 in peace .
Its days like where I miss dad , dad
would've never allowed anyone to lay a
hand on me , I prayed to God & asked him
to help me .

I slept my self in deep thoughts .

...........

my mom came back from work & knocked

on my door , that woke me up .

mom : Sne .
I looked at her .
mom : sabela , ngyakubiza nje .
me : ma ?

mom : I'm here to give you your stuff back

, I think you learnt your lesson & you'd
never do anything stupid ever again , we
did all that because we love you . here are
your things . *she gave me my phone ,
earpods , my money & my bank card*
me : oh , thanks .

mom : I love you Sne .

me : okay .

she looked at me & she left , I closed my

door & I was so happy ; I was over the
moon . I switched on my phone & I played
it while charging , I had texted my friends
, a few missed calls from Mthobisi , I
decided to call him ....

[ phone call ]

me : sawubona .
Mthobisi : themba lami lona lodwa .
me : unjani ?
Mthobisi : ngiyangcenga , usuyitholile
iphone? uyazi ukuthi namanje ngisalinde
wena ...
me : yes Iook , I've made my decision &
looked onto this and how everything
happened , I am willing to give you a
second chance , I think you deserve it ,
having hope ukuthi you'd never break my
heart again .

he praised my clan names & seemed to be

very happy , we spoke for a few more
minutes & I also feel like us fixing things
is the right thing to do .

.......

tommorow schools are opening , Its a very

cold sunday today ; I just woke up & I
made my bed ; looks like I'm alone in the
house .

I walk to the kitchen to make coffee , the

door fridge has a note "we are off to
church , clean up when you wake up , go
do your hair today , I left money on top of
my bed . love mom"

I went there & found R300 , I then decided

to clean first ; while listening to old rnb
songs , alicia keys on my play list playing
"unthinkinkable , empire estate &
womans worth" , after that I went to bath
& texted my friends .

[ group chat ]
me : morning luviess .
Kwanele : goodmorning

me : I'm going to town today , who wants

to come? I am only going to do my hair
though & then with change we will get
atleast icecream .

Aphile : typing ...

Buhle : I'm also going to town today , with
mom though to buy a new school skirt
cause she believes its too short .

I got a call from Mthobisi & he said he

wants to see me today , I wore my short
and my baggy hoodie ; I texted Mthobisi
& told him I am going to town today & he
insisted on going with me .

I took my phone , money & my small

purse bag . I locked the doors & the gate
vele he had parked outside my gate , I got
inside his car .

Insert 16 .
me : sawubona .
Mthobisi : qabula .
I kissed him on his cheek & he placed his
hand on my thigh .
Mthobisi : ngibona ngathi lento oyiqgokile
iveza kakhulu iskhumba sakho .
I looked at him .

me : okay , kukhona yini inkinga?

he started driving .
Mthobisi : cha , akaze ngisho ukuthi
kunenkinga .

me : cha phela usho makunenkinga .

it was a bit tense in the car until we got to

the mall , I told him my hair will take for
about 1h&30minutes because I need to get
it washed too . he waited for me in the
salon until I got my hair done .

yea it was weird because so many people

saw that he is old & I'm a school girl
dating some old guy but kunani , people
always talk ; I thought to my mind .

I was done in an hour cause I did

something simple , walked to the
recieptionist and then I paid , gave the
lady tip for being calm & gentle with my
hair .

me : asambenike .
Mthobisi : ufuna siyephi ?
me : angazi nami .

he stood up & offered to hold my hand .

me : can we please not ? kunamehlo la &
so many people are staring , its a bit
uncomfortable .

Mthobisi : unehloni ngami?

we were arguing while walking out of the

salón , namanje people are staring .

me : anginalo ihloni ngawe , can you

please just do what I'm asking you to do ?
Mthobisi : nx .
he clicks tongue .

me : hhawu ? okay ngibambeke , yazini?

vele ungiqukule , ungiqgoqgoshe sihambe
sikhombise wokumuntu ukuthi siyajola .

he smiles & actually lifts me up , I scream

"ayibo Mthobisi uzongwisa" , he runs
faster to the elavator , with everyone
starring & giving judgy eyes & I couldn't
help it but laugh , he is actually charming
.

we get to be the only people in the

elavator & he finally puts me down .

me : uyahlanya ne ? like uphaphembene

nyani . I look at him & laugh .
Mthobisi : ngiphambaniswa wuwe phela
shuthi .

I lift my arms to his shoulders & give him

"amanzi ewolintshi" , the kiss felt so safe
once again in a while .
the elavator opened & I broke the kiss
with a giggle .

we were holding hands walking out of the

elavator & he was leading the way us
going to the cinemas .
me : Mthobisi , I have to be home by 3 &
now its already pass 1 .
Mthobisi : cela sambe .
we walk inside & he pays to watch a
movie "Isethembiso" , he brought
popcorn & drinks & we walked inside .

we walked and sat by the back , a few

people were there too . the movie started ,
I don't want to lie , I wasn't paying any
attention to the movie , I was just starring
at him , his eyes & skin , its all enough , I
am head over heals for this guy .

me : Mthobisi .
Mthobisi : ya mama .
me : I want us to do something .
Mthobisi : ini? ukuthi sishada .*he laughs*
me : yes nalokho , kodwa I want you to
take me home mese ngifika , I want to tell
my mom about you .
Mthobisi : uyayidlalela noma ?
me : angdlali , asambeni .

we both stood up & walked to the parking

lot where he had parked his car . we got
inside & he held both my hands .
me : I really want to do it now .
Mthobisi : uyazi ukuthi angeke utshele
umawakho mese kubalula , nami
kwamele ngitshele ubaba , kuzomele
kwenziwe izinto eziningi kqala angithi ,
izinto ezizothatha iskhathi .

me : ngyazi , angnandaba .

Mthobisi : awu magalela omuhle , cha

ngaqonywa mina , inkosi yangibusisa
ngawe sthandwa sami .
I smile & we kissed .

Mthobisi : asambenike .

he took me home & dropped me of by the

store , I insisted that he waits here .

me : thani goodluck .
Mthobisi : ay , ngyazi uzoba right .
hamba.

I closed the door & he called me ...

Mthobisi : ngikuthanda ngenhliziyo yami

yonke , ngikuthanda ngangezulu ; uyikho
konke engikade kwase ngikufuna .

I smiled ...
me : ngyabuya hhawu Mthobisi ,
usuwenza ngathi ngiyofa .
I smiled again & closed his door & as I was
crossing the road & I heard him shout
"Sthandwa sami !"

my stomach felt 3 bullets in 2 seconds ,

everything happened so fast , I fell down
...

@ Mthobisi's pov .

Sne : thani goodluck .

me : ay , ngyazi uzoba right . hamba.

wase wavala umnyango , ay khona into

engyizwayo , ngaphinda ngambiza .

me : ngikuthanda ngenhliziyo yami yonke

, ngikuthanda ngangezulu ; uyikho konke
engikade kwase ngikufuna .
wabesesineka , wangbuka .
Sne : ngyabuya hhawu Mthobisi ,
usuwenza ngathi ngiyofa .

wasineka futhi wase wavala iscabha ,

ngambuka ewela umgwaqo ...

angeke kukwazi ukuba yilemoto

engicabanga ukuthi yiyona , ibona
labafana abakaMthimkhulu .
lomunye wabo wavula iwindi

me : Sthandwa sami !

aphenduke angbuke , kwaphuma izandla

ziqondise isbhamu kuSne , ngokukhulu
ukushesha , zamdubula esiswini .

ngehla emotweni ngagijima ngaya kuye ,

eselele phansi , ngamnyakasiza ,
akasaphefumuli .
abantu abebesemgwaqeni basondela
bagcwala .

me : fonelani iambulence !!!

zehla inyembezi .

me : Sne vuka ngyakcela vuka , Sthandwa

sami ngicela uvuke ngyak'cela .

indoda yona ayikhali , nami

bengingakhali bengizwa ubuhlungu
ngibhodla engikuzwa ngaphakathi .

THE END .
it has been a warm minute guys , more
love & a big thank you for all the support
<333.

snee mtshali .