MI

RAMt
himukhul
u:Thebl
i
ndgi
rl

PROLOGUE

Herscr
eamsar
epenet
rat
ingt
hrought
he
wal
lthatsepar
atesmi
neandt
hemast
er
bedr
oom,
pier
cingi
nmyear
s.The
ear
plugsi
'
m wear
ingdon’
tseem t
obe
hel
ping.She’
spl
eadi
ngf
orherl
i
feand
aski
ngf
orf
orgi
venessasi
fshehas
donesomet
hingwr
ongorhewoul
dst
op.
“
PleasemydearLor
dmakehi
m st
op
pl
ease,
he’
sgoi
ngt
oki
l
lher
”Isaya
si
l
encepr
ayerast
ear
smaket
hei
rway
downmycheeks.I
’
m bat
tl
ingt
o
under
standhowonehumancancar
ry
somuchangerbutmost
lywhyi
sshe
endur
ingt
hispai
n.Wheni
sitenough?
Whenwoul
dsheputanendt
othi
s?

If
eart
hatonedayIwoul
dhearherl
ast
scr
eamsandshewoul
dbenomor
e.I
don’
tknowwhatwoul
dbecomeofme
shoul
dtheunt
hinkabl
ehappen.If
ear
t
hatI
’
mtheonewhowoul
dbecomehi
s
punchi
ngbagandshewoul
dbe
nowher
etopr
otectmef
rom hi
m.These
ar
ethef
ear
sIhav
ebeenl
i
vingwi
th
ev
ery
dayofmyl
i
fef
ort
hepast2y
ear
s.
I
tsaddensmet
hati
t’
sonl
ynowt
hatI
r
eal
i
zehowpeacef
ull
i
fewaswheni
t
wasonl
ymeandher
.

Weuset
oli
veatNewcast
le,
Madadeni
sect
ion6i
naf
ourr
oomedhouse.I
twas
bi
genoughf
ort
het
woofus.Shewasa
wai
tr
essi
nsomer
est
aur
anti
ntownand
shewasn’
tear
ningal
otbutnev
eraday
hav
eIev
ersl
eptonanempt
yst
omach
norhadnot
hingt
owear
.Sheuset
odo
ex
trashi
ft
sandherboss,
MrsWi
l
li
ams
uset
ogi
vehersomeex
tracashf
or
doi
ngl
aundr
yforher
.Myhear
twasso
br
okent
hedayIl
ear
nedshepassedon,
Godbl
esshersoul
.Thi
ngschangedf
or
t
hewor
seaf
tert
hepassi
ngofMr
s
Wi
l
li
ams.Herdaught
erf
ail
edt
okeept
he
r
est
aur
antsust
ainedduehersi
ckeni
ng
at
ti
tudeandr
aci
sm.

Li
febecamet
ough,
lucki
l
yshehadsome
sav
ingsi
nherbankwhi
chl
ast
edusa
mont
hasshewasj
obhaunt
ing.I
r
emembert
hedayshecamebackhome
ex
cit
ed.“
Mir
a!mommyf
oundaj
ob!
”I
coul
dn’
tmi
sst
heex
cit
ementi
nher
v
oice.Webot
hscr
eamedi
nex
cit
ementI
washappyunt
ilshet
oldmet
hatwehad
t
omov
etoDur
ban.Herempl
oyerl
i
ved
i
nDur
banhewasi
nNewcast
lej
ustf
or
busi
nesspur
poses.If
eltl
i
kemywor
ld
wasshut
ti
ngdown.Thet
houghtof
l
eav
ingmyl
i
fet
her
eandst
art
inganew
l
i
fei
napl
aceIhav
enev
erbeenscar
ed
t
heshi
toutofme,
Ihav
e
met
athesi
ophobi
a.
“
Don’
twor
ry,
youwi
l
llov
eitt
her
emy
baby
.Dur
bani
sabeaut
if
ulpl
acemay
be
y
ouwi
l
lev
enmakef
ri
endst
her
emy
mi
racl
e”Idi
dn’
twantt
obur
stherbubbl
e
soIpr
etendedt
obehappyandknowi
ng
herIknewt
hatshewasnotgoi
ngt
o
t
aket
hej
obandl
ookf
oranot
herone.

Thatwomanwoul
ddoany
thi
ngf
orme
t
obehappy“
I’
ddi
eandki
l
lfory
oumy
mi
racl
eyouar
etheappl
eofmyey
e”I
cannev
ert
hankt
heLor
denoughf
or
bl
essi
ngmewi
thamot
herl
i
keher
.
She’
smywor
ldandI
’
m hermi
racl
e,
whenshewaspr
egnantwi
thmeshe
hadcompl
i
cat
ions.Iwasbor
nat10
mont
hsandt
hedoct
orswer
eal
ready
decl
ari
ngmedeadbutIsur
pri
sed
ev
ery
onewhenIcr
iedmyl
ungsoutt
he
momentIwasoper
atedoutofmy
mommy
’st
ummy
.Itwassur
pri
singt
hat
It
urnedoutt
obet
heheal
thi
estbaby
ev
erbutwi
thnosi
ght
.Iwasi
ndeeda
mi
racl
ewhi
chi
sshor
tenedf
orMi
ra.

Wemov
edt
oDur
banandst
ayedwi
th
mom’
sempl
oyerl
ucki
l
yitwast
heend
oft
hey
earsoIwasgoi
ngt
ost
artgr
ade
8t
hef
oll
owi
ngy
earatOpenAi
rschool
.
Mom wasMrKhumal
o’shel
perandwe
l
i
vedt
her
etoget
heri
nthesamehouse.
I
ttookmeawhi
l
etogetuset
othe
env
ironmentbutast
imewentonIgot
uset
oev
ery
thi
ngandIev
enmadea
f
ri
end.Thef
ir
sty
earwasgr
eatandi
t
wasev
engr
eat
eri
nthesecondy
ear
whenmom andMrKhumal
ost
art
ed
dat
ing.Het
ookv
erygoodcar
eofus,
mom st
oppedwor
kingf
orhi
m andt
hey
gotmar
ri
edi
ncour
t.

I
tfel
tgoodt
ohav
eaf
athersomeone
whowi
l
lal
way
shav
emybackand
pr
otectme.I
tfel
tgoodt
ohav
e
someonewhowi
l
lpr
otectmom f
ora
change.I
tfel
tgoodt
obedaddy
’sl
i
ttl
e
pr
incess,
somet
hingdeat
hrobbedme
of
fbycl
aimi
ngmyownf
atherbutIwas
gr
atef
ulf
orhav
ingmyst
epdadwho
woul
dfi
l
lthatv
oid,
li
tt
ledi
dIknowhe
woul
dtur
nint
othi
sunr
ecogni
zabl
e
per
sonwhocar
ri
essomuchangerf
or
noappar
entr
eason.Hear
ingher
hear
tbr
eaki
ng,
ant
agoni
zi
ngscr
eams
ev
eryni
ghthasbecomepar
tofmyl
i
fe,
a
par
tofmyl
i
fet
hatshat
ter
smysoul
and
l
eav
esmepr
ayi
ngt
hati
tisn’
tthel
ast
t
imeIhearherv
oice.
CHAPTER1
Thechi
rpi
ngoft
hebi
rdsout
sideev
ery
mor
ningi
smyal
armt
owakeup.If
iddl
e
myhandt
otakemywat
chonmy
bedsi
det
abl
eandcheckt
ime.Iopeni
t
andf
eel
theBr
ail
l
edot
swi
thmy
f
inger
ti
ps,
it’
s6am.Igetupf
rom t
hebed
andt
akemymuf
fi
nit
’sal
ongwhi
te
canet
hathel
psmemov
ear
ound.I
t
al
l
owsmet
olocat
est
eps,
str
eet
s,
dr
iveway
s,bi
cycl
es,
door
way
s,chai
rs,
desksoranyot
herobj
ectorpl
ace.I
gav
eitapetnamemuf
fi
nbecauseIl
ove
i
tandi
t’
smakesmyl
i
feeasi
er.i
t’
slong,
aboutt
wost
epsaheadofmyf
eetwhen
Iwal
k,If
indt
hingswi
thi
tbef
oreIgett
o
t
hem.I
t’
smysweet
hear
taf
termymom
ofcour
se.

Thet
huddi
ngsoundofmyhear
tist
he
onl
ysoundIcanhearasIf
indmywayt
o
t
heki
tchen,
pray
ingt
hatIwi
l
lfi
ndher
t
her
epr
epar
ingbr
eakf
ast
.Thesmel
lof
baconandeggshi
tmynost
ri
ls,
Ifeel
a
hi
ntofhope.
“
Goodmor
ningmymi
racl
e”
Nomat
terhowshet
ri
est
osoundj
oyf
ul
butshe’
snotconv
inci
ngandt
he
hoar
senessofherv
oicei
snotdoi
ngher
j
ust
ice.
“
Mommy
”Isaywi
thashakyv
oice,
tear
s
ar
etr
ickl
i
ngi
nmyey
esI
’
m af
rai
dof
bl
i
nki
ngbecauset
heywi
l
lfal
landt
hat
wi
l
lhur
thermor
e.Shenev
erwant
sto
seemecr
yingorhur
t.Ihearher
f
oot
stepscomi
ngt
owar
dsme.
“
Don’
tcr
ymymi
racl
e”Shepul
l
smet
o
herchestandcomf
ort
sme.Thet
aps
openandIl
etal
lmyt
ear
soutofwhi
ch
I
’
m notsur
etheyar
eofj
oyt
hatshe’
s
st
il
lal
i
veorsadnesst
hatshe’
ssuf
fer
ing
andIdon’
tknowhowt
ohel
pher
.
“
Shhhdon’
tcr
yit
’sgoi
ngt
obeokaymy
baby
,Ipr
omi
sey
ou”she’
ssay
sst
roki
ng
meonmyback.
“
Not
hingi
sgoi
ngt
obeokayasl
ongas
y
ouar
ewi
tht
hisman”Shedoesn’
trepl
y
butl
etl
oosef
rom me.
“
Mom he’
sbeat
ingy
ouup,
isn’
tit
”
“
Ofcour
senoty
ourf
atherwi
l
lnev
erdo
t
hatt
ome!
”ShesnapsandIchuckl
e,I
knowsheknowst
hatIknowt
hatdadi
s
abusi
ngher
.
“
I’
m notst
upi
dmom norbl
i
nd-
deafI
’
m
j
ustbl
i
nd.Ihearev
ery
thi
ngt
hati
s
happeni
ngi
nthi
shouse.Iknowhe’
s
beat
ingy
ouupev
erysi
ngl
eni
ght
.Ican’
t
sl
eepal
lIheari
syoucr
yingandbeggi
ng
hi
mtost
op.Thi
sisnotl
i
femommyI
t’
s
t
imet
oletgo”
“
Mir
ait
’snotaseasyasy
ousay
.Ican’
t
j
ustpackandgo!
”
“
WhyMom?
”
“
Ilov
ehi
m”shewhi
sper
saudi
ble
enoughf
ormet
ohear
“
Ift
hef
eel
i
ngi
smut
ual
hewoul
dn’
tbe
beat
ingy
ouup.
”
“
Youar
est
il
lyoungmychi
l
d,y
ouwi
l
l
under
standwheny
ouar
eol
derandi
n
l
ove”OhhowIhat
eitwhenadul
tspul
l
t
hat“
youar
est
il
lyoung”car
dtodef
end
t
hemsel
ves.IguessIwi
l
lnev
er
under
standbecauseIdon’
tthi
nkt
her
e
woul
dev
erbesomeonewhowi
l
lfal
li
n
l
ovewi
thme.
“
Gobat
handcomej
oinusf
orbr
eakf
ast
”
shesay
sdi
smi
ssi
ngt
het
opi
c.If
eel
his
pr
esencei
nfr
ontofmeasIt
urnt
o
makemywayout
.
“
Goodmor
ningdaddy
’sl
i
ttl
epr
incess”
Hesay
scheer
ful
l
ywi
thhi
sbol
dvoi
ce
andki
ssesmyf
orehead
“
Mor
ning”Ir
epl
yandwal
koutbef
orehe
sayany
thi
ng.Idon’
thav
eti
met
opl
ay
daddy
’sl
i
ttl
epr
incess.Hedi
sgust
sme
andI
’
m sl
owl
ybutsur
elyst
art
ingt
ohat
e
hi
m!

Imaybebl
i
ndbutI
’
mleadi
ngl
i
fel
i
ke
si
ght
edpeopl
e.Ther
e’snot
hingIdon’
t
doandt
her
e’snowher
eIdon’
tgo.Iev
en
wat
cht
vI’
m sur
eyouaski
ngy
our
sel
f
how,
wewi
l
lgett
her
efornowIhav
eto
t
akeabat
h.Taki
ngabat
hisnor
mal
li
ke
ev
ery
oneel
set
hedi
ff
erencei
sIr
elyon
t
hesenseoft
ouch.Mybat
hroom i
s
equi
ppedt
omakemyhy
gienepr
ocess
comf
ort
abl
eandenj
oyabl
e.Ther
e’san
i
nst
all
edgr
abbari
nmyshowert
ohol
d
wheni
'
m get
ti
ngi
nandoutoft
he
shower
.Int
het
ubandshowert
her
ear
e
sl
i
presi
stantst
icker
stopr
eventmet
o
f
all
.Ther
e’sapl
acet
okeepal
lmy
pr
oduct
s,washcl
othsandt
owel
soi
t
doesn’
tbecomeami
ssi
ont
ofi
ndt
hem.
I
t'
str
ickyt
odet
ermi
net
hedi
ff
erence
bet
weenacondi
ti
onerandshampoo
especi
all
ywhent
heyhav
ethesamesi
ze
andshapeoft
hecont
ainersoIpl
aced
r
ubberbandsi
neach,
thecondi
ti
oner
hav
etwor
ubberbandsandt
he
shampoohav
e3r
ubberbands.OnceI
’
m
donet
aki
ngashowerIhol
dthegr
abbar
t
ogetoutoft
heshower
.It
akemyt
owel
andwr
api
tar
oundmybodybef
ore
t
aki
ngmuf
fi
n.

Iwon’
tli
eandsayt
hatI
'
venev
erev
er
quest
ionedGod,
inf
actIst
il
ldobuti
t’
s
notl
i
ket
her
e’sgoi
ngt
obeachange.No
oneknowsnotev
ent
hedoct
orscan
det
ectwhat
’swr
ongwi
thmyey
es.
What
'ssur
pri
singi
smyey
esl
ook
nor
mal
mostpeopl
ewon’
ttel
lthatI
’
m
bl
i
nd.Ther
e’sonl
yoneper
sonwhohas
t
heanswer
sandt
hati
soursav
iour
,the
manabov
esoIchoset
oembr
acemy
l
i
feasi
tisandbegr
atef
ult
hathegav
e
mel
i
fe.I
’
m hav
ingal
azyday
,Idon’
t
needt
odr
essup.Apai
rofj
eanand
si
mpl
et-
shi
rtwi
l
ldo.Mymom hel
pst
o
keepmycl
osetor
gani
zedsoi
tdoesn’
t
becomeami
ssi
onf
ormewhenI
’
m
l
ooki
ngf
orsomet
hingt
owear
.

Mycl
othesar
eal
lpackedi
nthewayt
hat
i
seasyandnotconf
usi
ngf
orme.Iused
Br
ail
l
etagsandnumberofsaf
epi
nst
o
knowwhatcol
orofeachpi
ecei
s.Some
cl
othesar
esi
mil
art
otheot
herBr
ail
l
e
t
agshel
ps.Ther
ear
ecl
othest
hat
mat
ches,
Iputacer
tai
nnumberofpi
ns
t
oknowt
hatt
hispi
eceofcl
othi
ngt
hat
hav
etwosaf
epi
nsmat
cheswi
thpant
s
t
hathav
etwosaf
epi
nsaswel
l
.Ial
so
usedbut
tonst
olabel
mycl
othesi
nthe
wayt
hatwi
l
lbeeasyf
orme.Asf
or
shoesI
’
m al
way
sex
tracar
eful
tomake
sur
ethateachpai
rst
ayt
oget
her
.When
t
heyar
ethesamest
ylel
i
kepumpsI
separ
atet
hem byput
ti
ngeachpai
rina
boxl
abel
edi
nBr
ail
l
ewi
tht
hecol
or.

It
akeoutadeni
mjeanandwhi
tet
-shi
rt
t
hengetdr
essed.Isl
i
dei
ntomy
sl
eeper
sandheadt
othedi
ningar
ea.
Thesoundoft
hecut
ler
ytel
l
smet
hat
t
heyar
eal
readyeat
ing.If
indmyseat
anddown,
placi
ngmuf
fi
nnex
ttome.
“
Iwi
l
ldi
shupf
ory
oubaby
”say
smy
mom.
“
Somyl
i
ttl
eangel
whatar
eyoupl
anni
ng
t
odosi
ncey
ouhav
efi
nishedy
our
mat
ri
c”asksdadIwi
shhecanst
op
pr
etendi
ngt
obeni
ceagh!
“
Ihav
en’
tthoughtabouti
t”
“
Her
eyougo”say
smymom asshe
pl
acest
hef
oodi
nfr
ontofme.If
iddl
e
f
ort
hecut
ler
yandst
arteat
ing.
“
Whatdoy
oumeany
ouhav
en’
tthought
abouti
t”Goshcan’
tthi
smanl
etmeeat
i
npeace.
“
Imeanj
ustt
hat
”
“
Mir
a”mom war
nsIhuf
f.Idon’
tgetwhy
doIhav
etopl
ayhappyf
ami
l
y
“
I'
m goi
ngt
oeati
nmybedr
oom”
“
Noonei
seat
ingi
nthebedr
oom!
”
“
Wel
lIl
ostmyappet
it
e”It
akemuf
fi
n
nex
ttome
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thy
out
odayMi
ra”dad
askssweet
lyy
ou’
dswearhecar
es.
“
Youar
emypr
obl
em”Isay
“
Mir
ast
opi
tnow!
!”Mymom y
ell
s
“
I’
m sor
rymom”
“
HoneyIt
hinkIwoul
dhav
eagl
assof
mi
l
knotj
uice”
“
Iwi
l
lgeti
tfory
oumyl
ove”mom r
epl
i
es
“
Thanky
oumyl
ove….
.whatt
hef
ucki
s
y
ourpr
obl
em gi
rl
!”
”
Youar
emypr
obl
em Iknowy
ouar
e
beat
ingmymom andI
’
m notgonnasi
t
anddonot
hing,
youar
egoi
ngbehi
nd
bar
s”Isayst
ernl
yI’
m notaboutt
oshow
hi
mthatI
’
m scar
edofhi
m.Hel
aughs
outl
oudl
y
“
OhMi
ramygi
rlwhowoul
dbel
i
evey
ou
huh?Whowoul
dbel
i
eveabl
i
ndgi
rl
?”He
say
slaughi
ng
“
Ther
eismor
ethanonewayt
oget
pr
oveMrKhumal
o.Youseet
hatwoman
i
smymot
herandIwoul
ddowhat
everi
t
t
akesf
orhert
ogethel
pandf
ory
out
o
beex
posed”If
eel
hist
ightgr
iponmy
wr
istandhi
sbr
eat
hingonmyf
ace
“
List
enher
eli
tt
legi
rli
fyoudar
ecause
pr
obl
emsbet
weenmeandy
ourmot
her
,
Iwi
l
lsl
i
ceheri
ntopi
eces”Iswal
l
owspi
t
“
Sobeagoodgi
rlandbegr
atef
ulf
ort
he
l
uxur
iousl
i
feIgi
vey
ou”Het
ight
enshi
s
gr
iponmywr
ist
scausi
ngan
ex
cruci
ati
ngpai
n.
“
What
’sgoi
ngonher
e?”
Asksmymom
“
Wewer
ejusthav
ingadaught
erand
f
atherconv
ersat
ionhoney
,ri
ghtMi
ra”
Hel
etgoofmywr
ist
Me:
“Y.
..
ye.
.Yes”Ist
ammerr
ubbi
ngmy
wr
istundert
het
abl
e.If
eel
tear
s
t
hreat
eni
ngt
ofal
lasIr
eal
i
zet
hatwe
ar
edeepi
ntot
hisdar
khol
eandi
tlooks
l
i
kewear
enotgoi
ngt
ocomeoutofi
t
any
timesoon.
CHAPTER2

If
eel
angr
ytear
sti
ckl
i
ngi
nthecor
ner
s
ofmyey
es.IswearI
’
m goi
ngt
obur
st
duet
othi
sboi
l
ingangerwi
thi
nme.I
'
ve
beent
ryi
ng,
bel
i
evemeI
’
mreal
l
ytr
ying
t
ounder
standbutIcan’
tfat
hom out
howl
oveget
sassoci
atedwi
thabuse
andpai
normay
beI
'
m st
upi
dandnai
ve
af
teral
lshedi
dsayI
’
myoung.I
t’
sbeen
aweeknowandev
erysi
ngl
edayIf
eel
l
i
kel
i
fei
ssucki
ngoutal
lthest
rengt
h
andener
gywi
thi
nmet
ohel
pmymom
outoft
hishel
lhol
e.Themor
eIt
hinkof
t
hesubt
leway
sit
’st
hemor
emymi
nd
becomesbl
ank.I
t’
sti
mesl
i
ket
hisIwi
sh
Ihav
esi
ght
,may
bej
ustmay
bei
t
woul
d’v
ebeenbet
ter
.

“
Stopf
ight
ingwi
thmydi
shes!
”Ipr
etend
l
i
keIdi
dn’
thearherandcont
inuet
otake
al
lmyangeri
ntot
hesedi
shes.
“
Mir
aMt
himkhul
u!!
!”somet
hingpi
ercei
n
myf
ingerandIscr
eam i
nagony
.
“
Itol
dyout
ost
opi
tbuty
oudon’
twant
t
oli
sten!Letmesee!
”Shemakesmesi
t
downont
hechai
r
“
Don’
tmov
eI'
m goi
ngt
ofet
cht
hef
ir
st
ai
dki
t”Icl
earal
umpcl
oggi
ngi
nmy
t
hroatandr
epl
y
“
EhMama”Myt
humbi
sthr
obbi
ng
what
evert
hati
mpal
edmemust
’vebeen
v
eryshar
p.Shecomesbackandat
tends
myt
humb.
“
Youbr
okeagl
assandcuty
ourt
humb.
I
’
m goi
ngt
oappl
yant
isept
ic,
it'
sgoi
ng
t
ost
ingsabi
t”Hel
li
tdi
d.
”
NowI
’
m goi
ngt
owr
apapl
ast
erer
ar
oundy
ourt
humb.Youneedt
obe
car
eful
Mir
a,y
oucoul
dhav
ehur
t
y
our
sel
fbadl
y”
“
Sti
l
litwoul
dhav
ehur
tbet
tert
han
knowi
ngt
hatmonst
eri
str
eat
ingy
oul
i
ke
hi
spunchi
ngbag”
“
JesusMi
ra,
howcany
ousayt
hat
”The
shocki
sev
identi
nherv
oicebutI
’
m not
changi
ngmyst
atementt
omakeherf
eel
bet
ter
.I’
m donenur
singherf
eel
i
ngs
becausecl
ear
lyshedoesn’
tcar
eabout
mi
ne.
“
It
’st
rueMama.Youhav
enoi
deahow
br
okenIam i
nsi
de.Iwi
shy
oucanopen
y
ourey
esandseet
hathe’
sabusi
ngy
ou.
Whatki
ndofl
ovei
sthi
s?Whycan’
tyou
seet
hathedoesn’
tdeser
vey
ou.
”Isay
r
aisi
ngmyv
oiceabi
t
“
Mir
amt
anami
howmanyt
imesar
ewe
goi
ngt
otal
kaboutt
hishuh?St
opi
t
okay
”
“
Idon’
tknowhowy
oudoi
tbutIcan’
t
okay
?Ican’
tpr
etendl
i
keI
’
m okay
.
Knowi
ngt
hathebeat
syouandt
her
e's
absol
utel
ynot
hingIcandot
ohel
pyou
ki
l
lsmysoul
!”Ibi
temyl
i
phar
d
pr
event
ingi
tfr
om shi
ver
ingast
ear
sfal
l
downmycheeks.Ihearherr
eleasi
nga
hugesi
gh
“
Comel
et’
sgot
othel
ounge”Igetup
f
rom t
hechai
randshel
i
nksherar
ms
wi
thmi
net
ogui
demet
othel
ounge.
Whenwegett
her
ewesi
tdown.
“
Lookmybabyt
her
ear
ethi
ngsy
ou
woul
dn’
tunder
standasy
ouar
eyoung.I
needy
out
ost
opst
ressi
ngandt
rustme
mymi
racl
e”
“
He’
sgoi
ngt
oki
l
lyoumommy
,Idon’
t
wantt
olosey
oupl
easel
et’
sleav
ehi
m”
“
Andgowher
eMi
rahuh?
”Ican’
tmi
ssa
hi
ntofannoy
ancei
nherv
oice
“
InourhomeatNewcast
le”
“
Isol
dthathouse”Noshedi
dn’
t!
“
When?Whyhav
en'
tyout
oldme?
”
“
Idon’
trepor
ttoy
ouMi
ra,
youar
ea
chi
l
d,y
ouneedt
oknowy
ourpl
aceand
t
hathousewasmi
ne.Ev
eni
fitwasst
il
l
av
ail
abl
ehowwoul
dwehav
esur
viv
ed
huh?I
’
m unempl
oyedMi
raandl
i
fei
s
v
erysl
owanddi
ff
icul
tatNewcast
le.
Thi
sisourhomeandt
hatmani
smy
husband,
yourf
ather
.Hel
ovesus,
he
j
ustgoi
ngt
hroughsomuchst
ufft
hatI
can’
tshar
ewi
thy
oubecausey
ouar
e
y
oung.Hei
staki
ngcar
eofus,
youeat
f
ancyf
ood,
youwearex
pensi
vecl
othes,
y
ouhav
eyourownr
oom t
hathasa
bat
hroom speci
fi
cal
l
yequi
ppedf
ory
ou,
y
ouhav
eacomput
er,
youhav
ean
i
Phone,
youhav
eachauf
feur,
youj
ust
mat
ri
cul
atedandhehasmoneyf
ory
ou
t
ofur
thery
ourst
udi
es.Thi
smandoes
al
otf
orusMi
ra,
whycan’
tyoube
gr
atef
ulf
orwhaty
ouhav
ebecause
wi
thoutt
hatmany
ouwoul
dn’
tbecl
ose
t
oli
vi
ngl
i
keanor
mal
teenage!
”Thathi
t
har
dbuti
t’
sthet
rut
hifi
twasn’
tforhi
m,
Iwoul
dn’
tbel
i
vingl
i
keanor
mal
teenage.
Hedoesev
ery
thi
ngf
orme.Imustadd
t
hathemademyl
i
femor
eeasyand
enj
oyabl
e.WhenIcameher
e,Ist
art
ed
seei
ngmyl
i
fei
naposi
ti
vewayandI
l
ear
nedt
oembr
acei
t.Ist
oppedwi
th
sel
fpi
tyandquest
ioni
ngGodandl
i
ve
wi
thnor
egr
etbuti
sal
loft
hatwor
thmy
mom’
sli
fe?Def
ini
tel
ynot
!Ishoul
dhav
e
di
edf
orr
eal
,shewoul
dn’
thav
etosuf
fer
l
i
ket
his.I
fIwer
etochooseI
’
dchoose
herov
ermeany
time.Ican’
tst
opmy
t
ear
sfr
om f
all
i
ng.I
’
m deepl
yhur
tand
whatpai
nst
hemosti
sthatt
her
e’s
not
hingIcandot
ochangeoursi
tuat
ion.
Idon’
twantt
olosemymom,
I’
m not
r
eadyandIwi
l
lnev
erber
eadybutt
he
t
ri
ckypar
ther
eist
hatIcant
akear
isk
andaskf
orhel
p,dadcoul
dfi
ndoutand
ki
l
lherorIshoul
djustpr
etendasi
f
ev
ery
thi
ngi
sokayandwai
tfort
heday
hebeatherupt
odeat
h.
“
Hushnowmymi
racl
e”She’
sst
roki
ng
herhandonmybackasIl
eti
tal
lout
.
I
t’
sthenex
tday
,I’
m goi
ngoutwi
thmy
f
ri
endGugu.Goi
ngt
othemal
lorany
cr
owdedpl
acei
sex
haust
ingf
orme.
Toomanypeopl
eroami
ngar
oundand
somebumpi
ngonmymuf
fi
nmay
bei
fI
hadagui
dedogi
twoul
dhav
ebeen
bet
terbutIt
hinkIcoul
ddowi
thf
reshai
r.
Justbeawayf
rom t
hissoul
l
esshome
f
orf
ewhour
sandspendt
imewi
thmy
cr
azybi
tch.Ij
ustf
ini
sheddr
essi
ngupi
n
ashor
tfl
oral
dresswi
thsandal
s.I
’
ma
gi
rlwhol
i
kesshoppi
ng,
dressi
ngupand
smel
l
inggood.Regar
dlessoft
hef
act
t
hatI
’
mtot
all
ybl
i
ndIdohav
emyst
yles
andmyf
avor
it
ecol
ors.Myf
avor
it
e
col
orsar
eyel
l
owandbl
ack.Il
ove
wear
inganycl
othi
ngabov
emykneesor
shor
tert
hant
hatbecausemymom and
Gugusay
sIhav
elongsex
ylegs.Iknow
t
hoset
wowoul
dnev
ermakeaf
ool
of
me.WhenIdoshoppi
ngt
hey
accompanymeandgi
vemet
he
descr
ipt
ionsoff
ashi
ont
rendsand
ev
ery
thi
ngt
ohel
pmef
orm asenseof
f
ashi
ont
hatwor
ksf
orme.Ani
mageof
aper
soni
sver
yimpor
tantandi
thar
dto
measur
emy
sel
fupwi
thot
herpeopl
e
whenIcan’
tseewhatt
heyar
ewear
ing
andt
hatmakesmewonderi
fmysense
off
ashi
onf
iti
nthesoci
etybutIgotmy
mom andGuguasmymi
rr
ors.It
akemy
duf
fl
ebagandmyphonet
henheadout
,
I
’
m wel
comedbyt
hesmel
lofbi
scui
ts,
Mom i
sbaki
ng.

“
Mom I
’
mleav
ing”
“
Atl
astSoxhav
ebeenwai
ti
ngf
ort
oo
l
ongnow”
“
Mal
umeSoxunder
standt
hatagi
rl
got
tat
akehert
ime”
“
Yeahwhat
everhav
efunsweet
hear
t”
Sheki
ssesmyf
orehead
“
CanIhav
eonepl
ease”
“
AyMi
raI
’
m notf
ini
shed”Igi
ggl
eand
f
indmywayout
.Mal
umeSoxi
smy
chauf
feur
.
“
Wuuumt
wanauy
ababauwupel
ele!
”
(
Wuuubabey
ouar
ehotl
i
kechi
l
ies)I
gi
ggl
eMal
umeSoxnev
ermi
ssesaday
wi
thoutcompl
i
ment
ingmesomet
imesI
t
hinkhe’
sex
agger
ati
ng.
“
AhhhwenaMi
raMi
raont
hewal
l,t
he
pr
ett
iestoft
hem al
luy
athanda
ukunghl
ekamangi
khul
umanawe”(
you
l
i
ket
olaughatmewhenI
’
mtal
ki
ngt
o
y
ou)
“
Aski
esMal
umet
akenoof
fensei
t’
sjust
t
hatuy
anchaz
a”Idol
i
kehi
m he’
sfunny
andwi
tt
y,anuncl
eInev
erhad.Act
ual
l
y
t
hewor
dIshoul
dbeusi
ngi
sbr
other
becausehe’
s25y
ear
sol
d,7y
ear
sol
der
t
henmebutIpr
efermal
umeanddon’
t
askmewhybecauseIdon’
tknow.
“
Ohhai
n’
tyouasweett
hing,
giv
euncl
e
somesugar
”Weshar
eahugt
heIget
i
nsi
deoft
hecarandsecondl
aterhe
get
sint
oo.
“
Sowher
etomt
wana”
“
Wegoi
ngt
ost
artatGugu’
spl
ace
mal
umeandpi
ckherup.
”
“
Okayawushowenz
iway
ini
umngani
wakhoaphapheso”(
Tel
lmewhyy
our
f
ri
endi
ssof
orwar
d)Il
augh.Thecar
st
art
smov
ing.
“
Shehasabubbl
yper
sonal
i
tybynat
ure
Mal
ume”
“
AyMi
rauqal
i
lengal
amagamaakho
esi
l
unguamakhul
u”(
AyMi
ray
ouhav
e
st
art
edwi
thy
ourbombast
icwor
ds)
I
gi
ggl
eIdon’
trecal
lanybombast
icwor
d
i
nmysent
ence,
youseeIt
oldy
ouhe
l
i
kest
oex
agger
ate.
“
Uzal
weenj
emal
ume”(
shewasbor
n
l
i
ket
hisuncl
e)
“
Ayuy
aphaphamaan!
”Hewhi
stl
es
causi
ngmet
ogi
ggl
e
“
Eyuncl
ethatmyf
ri
end”
“
Aski
esmt
wana”Gugust
aysf
ive
housesbef
oremi
ne.Wepi
ckherupt
he
momentsheget
sinshescr
eamsand
hugsme.
“
Bit
chhowar
eyou!
”
“
Can’
tyout
alkwi
thoutswear
ingl
i
keany
ot
hergi
rl
sandst
opscr
eami
ng
maphapheni
”mal
umesay
sandIl
augh
“
YazwenaSoxkadengakubonaukut
hi
uy
angi
funa,
youar
enotmyt
ypeshame”
(
YouknowSoxIal
way
sknewy
ouwant
me)Gugur
epl
i
est
omal
umeSoxwho
bur
sti
ntol
aught
er
“
Wuuumygi
rlev
eni
fyouwer
elastgi
rl
onear
thIwoul
dn’
tdat
eyou”
“
Ohpl
easey
ouknowdeepdowny
ou
wantme.Sewkhat
hel
eil
abomahosha
obat
hengay
ophel
awenaushi
mil
e
i
smameuy
asi
saba”(
Youar
eti
redof
pr
ost
it
utesandy
ouar
escar
edof
women)Theset
woar
eal
way
sli
ket
his
andI
'
m al
way
slaughi
ngwhenI
’
m wi
th
t
hem unt
ilmyt
ummyhur
ts.
“
Youknowbet
terbecausey
ouar
eone
oft
hem.Tel
lmewher
eam It
aki
ngy
ou
t
woandshuty
ourbi
gmout
h”
“
Thev
erysamemout
hyouar
edy
ingt
o
ki
sshahaha.Takeust
opav
il
ionmal
l
”In
secondst
hecarst
art
smov
ing.
“
ChomeeIwasaski
nghowar
eyou
bef
oreIwasr
udel
yint
err
upt
ed”
“
I’
m okaydar
li
nghowar
eyou”
“
I’
m al
sof
inesweet
hear
t“Wet
alkabout
r
andom st
uffunt
ilmal
umedr
opsusat
t
hemal
l
.
“
Let
’seatf
ir
st,
I’
m st
arv
ing.Ar
eyou
downf
orgal
axygr
il
l?
”sheasks
“
Ofcour
se”She’
snott
heGuguIknow
t
odayormay
bei
t’
smyi
magi
nat
ionbut
myf
ri
endi
sbubbl
yandf
unnyal
lthe
t
ime.Someonebumpi
ntomeIal
most
f
all
.
“
Bit
chl
ookwher
eyouar
egoi
ng!
”It
ryt
o
openmymout
htosaysomet
hingbut
wor
dsar
est
ucki
nmyt
hroatandmy
hear
tisbeat
ingsof
ast
.
“
Youar
etheonewhoshoul
dlookwher
e
y
ouar
egoi
ngwhatdoy
out
hinkt
his
whi
test
icki
sfor
!!
”Gugusay
s
“
Sheshoul
dst
ayhomei
fshe’
sbl
i
nd
nx
!!”Iwon’
tli
ethathi
thomeandwas
enought
omakemewantt
ogohome
now.
“
FuckYou!
..
.Comebaby
”Gugusay
sas
shet
akesmyhandandl
eadmet
oour
t
abl
e.Thewai
terbr
ingst
hemenuf
orus
andGugur
eadsi
toutl
oudf
ormesi
nce
t
heydon’
thav
etheBr
ail
l
eone.I
’
ma
l
i
ghteat
ersoIopt
edf
ort
hel
i
ghtmeal
.
Gugucal
l
sthewai
terandpl
aceher
or
der
.
“
Ribbur
gerandv
ani
l
lami
l
kshake”
“
Chi
ckenandav
oandv
ani
l
lami
l
kshake”
“
Comi
ngr
ightup
“
CanIhav
eagl
assofwat
erpl
ease”The
i
nci
dentt
hathappenedmi
nut
esagol
eft
mef
eel
i
ngsomet
ypeaway
.Myhear
tis
st
il
lbeat
ingf
astandIcanst
il
lhearhi
s
har
shv
oicei
nmyear
s.
“
It
’scomi
ngMi
ss”
“
Heydon’
tlett
hatr
udecut
eguyt
ospoi
l
y
ourmood”Gugusay
sIguessi
t’
sthat
obv
ious.Thewai
terbr
ingswat
erandI
gul
pital
ldown
“
Thanky
ou.
..
.Tel
lmewhat
’sbot
her
ing
y
ou.Icant
ell
thaty
ouar
enoty
our
sel
f
t
oday
”Ihearhercl
ear
inghert
hroat
“
Uhm y
ouknowt
hatIl
ovey
our
ight
”
okayt
hissoundser
iousandIf
eel
li
ke
what
evershe’
sgoi
ngt
osaywoul
dmake
mesad.
“
AndIl
ovey
out
oobabe”
Shet
akesmy
handsi
ntoher
s
“
Mydadf
oundabet
terj
obi
n
Johannesbur
gsowear
emov
ingt
o
Gaut
eng”If
reemyhandsf
rom her
sasI
di
gestwhatshe’
ssay
ing
“
Saysomet
hingMi
ra”
“
Woul
dthatchangeany
thi
ng”
“
Mir
acomeon”
“
It
’sf
ineGuguy
ouar
eleav
ingmeand
t
her
e’snot
hingIcandoaboutt
hat
”
“
Iwi
l
lvi
sity
ouandy
oucancomeand
v
isi
tmet
oobaby
.Idon’
twantt
oleav
e
t
oobutt
her
e’snot
hingIcando”
“
Thencomest
aywi
thus”Isayoutof
i
mpul
seandr
egr
eti
tlat
er,
Idon’
twant
myf
ri
endt
oknowt
heki
ndofl
i
fewear
e
l
i
vingt
her
e.
“
Thatwon’
tbepossi
ble,
Ihav
eal
ready
beenaccept
edatUJ”
“
Oh,
looksl
i
ket
hishasbeenpl
anned
l
ongt
imeago.It
houghtwewer
etaki
ng
agapy
ear
?”
“
Ther
ent
sref
used,
theysai
dagapy
ear
f
orwhat
”
“
Sowhathav
eappl
i
edf
or”
“
BCom account
ing”
“
Ithoughty
oul
ovej
our
nal
i
sm Gugu”
“
Youknowhowmydadi
sMi
ra”The
annoy
ancei
nherv
oicecan’
tbemi
ssed.
Her
e’st
het
hingwi
thGugu’
sfat
her
,he’
s
t
oocont
rol
l
ingandst
ri
cti
tdoesn’
thel
p
t
hatGugui
stheel
dest
.
“
Yhoi
t’
stoughmosgoodl
uck”Ibl
i
nk
backmyt
ear
sbackbutt
heyf
all
.
“
Heydon’
tcr
y,Iwi
l
lbeaphonecal
l
away
”Ican’
thel
pmy
sel
fwehav
ebeen
f
ri
endsf
orf
oury
ear
snow.She’
sthe
onl
yfr
iendIhav
eev
ermadei
nmyl
i
fe.I
l
i
ket
aki
ngwal
ksal
onej
ustt
ost
ret
chmy
l
egs.Igotl
ostbecauseIwasst
il
lnewi
n
t
hispl
aceandshehel
pedmef
indmy
home.Lucki
l
yherf
atherandmy
st
epdadknoweachot
hersot
hat
'show
ourf
ri
endshi
pst
art
ed.Il
oveherso
muchandsheaccept
edmet
hewayI
am.WhatIl
i
keaboutheri
sthatshe
l
ovesmef
orwhoIam andshedoesn’
t
f
eel
sor
ryf
ormeort
reatmesomeki
nd
ofwayj
ustbecauseI
’
m bl
i
nd.It
rul
y
f
oundaf
ri
endi
nher
.Wewer
ebot
h
doi
nggr
ade12i
nsepar
ateschool
of
cour
seandourf
ri
endshi
pgotst
rong
f
rom t
hev
eryf
ir
stdaybutnowIf
ear
t
hatshewi
l
lgot
oJohannesbur
g,meet
newf
ri
endsandf
orgetaboutt
hebl
i
nd
gi
rl
.
“
Youar
emaki
ngmecr
ynowbabe.
Pl
easedon’
tcr
y,y
ouwon’
tev
ennot
ice
I
’
m nother
e.Iwi
l
lcal
l
,sendmessages
andv
ideocal
lyouev
ery
dayokay
”Inod
andwi
pemyt
ear
s
“
Whenar
eyoul
eav
ing”
“
Tomor
row”sosoon!Ourf
oodar
ri
ves
“
Her
e’sy
ourchi
ckenandav
omi
sswi
th
y
ourmi
l
kshakeont
hesi
de”
“
Thanky
ou”Isay
“
Sohav
eyout
oldRi
cky
”Ri
ckyi
sher
col
oredboy
fri
end
“
Yes,
he’
snott
alki
ngt
omeMi
ra.Idon’
t
knowwhatt
odo,
Idon’
twantt
oleav
e
wi
thoutseei
nghi
m”
“
I’
m sor
ryhewi
l
lcomear
oundI
’
m sur
e.
I
tmustbehar
dforhi
m asmuchasi
tis
f
orme”
“
Iguessy
ouar
eri
ght
”shesi
ghsour
t
opi
cshi
ft
sfr
om onet
hingt
oanot
her
unt
ilwef
ini
sheat
ing.Sheof
fert
opay
t
hebi
l
lthenwegodosomeshoppi
ng
f
orhersi
nceshe’
sgoi
ngt
ost
art
uni
ver
sit
y.Wer
eal
l
yhadf
unandGugu
coul
dn’
tst
opt
aki
ngpi
ctur
esofusand
post
sthem onsoci
alnet
wor
ks.Oncewe
ar
edoneIcal
lMal
umet
ocomepi
ckus
up.YesIdohav
eaphoneandIIknow
howt
ousei
tbyt
hehel
pofanapp
cal
l
edVoi
ceOv
er,
ever
yact
ionIdoi
s
spokenoutl
oudf
ormef
rom cl
i
cki
ngan
appt
ocal
l
ingsomeone.Al
lthankst
o
assi
sti
vet
echnol
ogyt
hatenabl
esust
he
l
owi
mpai
redorbl
i
ndt
ouset
echnol
ogy
l
i
kesi
ght
edpeopl
e.Ther
e’sscr
een
r
eadi
ngsof
twar
eandspeci
alt
alki
ng
appst
hatenabl
esust
ousecomput
ers,
cel
l
phoneandot
herel
ect
roni
cdev
ice
i
ndependent
ly.
Mal
umear
ri
vesandt
akeushome,
we
st
artbydr
oppi
ngGuguandIpr
omi
se
hert
hatIwi
l
lcomebyt
osaygoodby
e
t
omor
rowmor
ningaf
tert
hatwehug
t
henwedr
ivehome.
“
Thanky
oumal
umeSox
”
“
Nomai
nini
mtwana”(
any
timebaby
)I
makewayi
nsi
det
hehouse.Icanhear
mom gi
ggl
i
ngasIwal
ktot
hel
ounge.
“
Babyy
ouar
eback”
“
YesI
’
mti
red,
I’
mjustgonnagosl
eep”
“
Awcomej
oinusbabygi
rl
,daddy
mi
ssedy
ou”Lor
dyourmani
sannoy
ing
me.Ij
oint
hem andt
heymakemesi
tin
bet
weent
hem.Wechatl
i
keweuset
o
bef
orehechanged.Lat
emom di
shes
outf
orusweeatandgot
osl
eep.

Thenex
tmor
ningIwakeupanddomy
hy
gienepr
ocesst
hengetdr
essedi
na
deni
m shor
tandbl
ackv
est
.Isl
i
dei
nto
mysl
i
pper
sandt
akemuf
fi
nbef
ore
headi
ngout
.Wel
lInev
ercl
eanar
ound
normakemybedmom i
stheonewho
doest
hechor
es,
Ijusthel
pher
eand
t
her
enott
hatIcan’
t.Shet
aughtmewel
l
t
het
hingi
sthi
swomanspoi
l
smet
oo
much.

If
indhersi
ngi
ng,
sheal
way
ssi
ngswhen
she’
sinagoodmoodandshesi
ngsv
ery
wel
lbutshesay
sIsi
ngerbet
tert
hanher
,
Ihav
eanangel
i
cvoi
ce.Idol
ovet
osi
ng
especi
all
ywhenI
’
mtaki
ngashowerand
Il
ovemusi
cinf
actIoncet
houghtof
my
sel
fasamusi
cianbutIf
earof
st
art
ingnewschool
,rej
ect
ionand
j
udgementi
sal
way
scr
ippl
i
ngmymi
nd.I
di
dsayIhav
emet
athesi
ophobi
a

“
Someonei
sint
hegoodmoodt
oday
”
Lastni
ghtshewasn’
tmaki
ngt
heusual
scr
eamst
heseoneswer
efunnybutdad
i
stheonet
hatwasgr
owl
i
ngl
i
kea
woundedani
mal
.
“
Mor
ningmymi
racl
e”shepl
ant
sapeck
onmyl
i
ps.
“
Mmhwomandi
dyougi
vet
hatmant
he
t
ast
eofhi
smedi
cine”
“
Hai
boukhul
umangani
”(
whatar
eyou
t
alki
ngabout
)
“
Don'
tpl
aydumbmommy
,Ihear
dhi
m
hewasgr
owl
i
ngl
i
keawoundedani
mal
.
Youmusthav
eVanDammeandChuck
Nor
ri
shi
m st
rong”Shebur
sti
nto
l
aught
er
“
Youar
ecr
azy
”okayIdon’
tfol
l
ow
what
’sf
unny
“
ComeonMom shar
ephel
asoy
ou
showedhi
mjudakar
ate”
“
Judakar
a…what
?”Shecackl
esnowI
f
eel
dumbwhati
sfunny
?
“
Her
eIpackedsomecooki
esf
orGugu.
Tel
lhert
obenotast
rangerandIl
ove
hersomuch”Shegi
vesmeapl
ast
icbag.
“
Iwi
l
ldot
hanks.I
’
m comi
ngbacknow
f
ort
hoset
ipsj
ustI
ncaseImeett
hat
r
udeboyagai
nandshowhi
m some
f
lamesl
i
key
oudi
dtodad”
“
Whatboy
?”It
ell
herwhathappenedat
t
hemal
lyest
erday
“
Aghsukadon'
tmi
ndhi
m babygonow”
“
Bye”Imakemywayout
,obv
iousI
’
m
goi
ngt
owal
kit
’sf
ivehousesawayv
ele
noneedt
ocal
lmal
umeSox
.Gugu’
s
mom i
stheonet
hatwel
comesme,
such
asweetwoman
“
Mir
ahey
!”Shepul
l
smet
oherar
msand
hugsme
“
Heymamahowar
eyou”
“
I’
m goodbaby
,howar
eyou”Shel
ets
l
oose
“
I’
m al
sof
ineMama,
Ibr
oughtsome
cooki
es,
mom bakedt
hem ”
“
Oht
hat
’ssosweett
hankherf
orme
pl
ease”shet
akest
hepl
ast
icbagonmy
hand
“
Iwi
l
lMama,
wher
e’sGugu”
“
She’
sst
il
li
nherbedr
oom sul
ki
ng.Let
meputt
hesecooki
esi
ntheki
tchenand
t
akey
out
oherr
oom”
“
Rel
axMom Iknowmywayar
oundt
his
housedon’
twor
ry”
“
Ohokaysweet
s”Imakemyway
upst
air
swhi
cht
akesmel
ongerasI
’
m
notqui
teuset
othem.Ourhousei
sa
si
ngl
est
ory
.Herr
oom i
sthef
ir
stoneon
myr
ight
.
“
Fri
endopenup,
itsme”Thedooropen
andImakemywayi
n,she’
ssni
ff
ingand
Ij
ustknewshe’
scr
ying.Wesi
tonher
bedandsher
est
sherheadonmyt
highs
asIcomf
ort
sher
“
Shhhi
t’
sgoi
ngt
obeokay
”
“
Itwi
l
lnev
erbe,
Rickybr
okeupwi
thme
l
astni
ght
.Ithur
tsMi
ra”
“
OhbabeI
’
m sor
ry”Idon’
tknowwhatt
o
say
,I’
m notgoodatconsol
i
ngpeopl
e
andbei
ngcl
uel
essaboutbei
ngi
nlov
eis
notdoi
ngmej
ust
ice.Icomf
ort
sherunt
il
shecal
msdown,
justt
henherdadcal
l
s
outf
orherandannouncet
hatt
heyar
e
l
eav
ing.Icoul
dn’
thol
dmyt
ear
s
any
mor
ewehugf
ort
hel
ongestt
ime
andi
tfeel
sli
keIwi
l
lnev
erseeheragai
n,
i
tfeel
sli
kei
t’
saf
inal
goodby
e.
Il
ovey
ou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Wehugonceagai
nandI
st
ayr
oot
edunt
ilIcoul
dn’
theart
he
soundofcart
henmakemywayhome
wi
thaheav
yhear
t.Ther
e’ssomeone
f
oll
owi
ngmeandmysensesnev
erl
i
e
henceIal
way
srel
yont
hem.The
f
oot
stepsar
eget
ti
ngcl
oserIcaughta
whi
ffofhi
sper
fumeandmyhear
tski
ps
abeat
.It
ryt
owal
kasf
astasmyl
egs
coul
dcar
rymebutmykneesar
e
wobbl
i
ng.It
ri
p,bef
oreIf
all
down
someonecat
chesme.
“
Igoty
ou”I
tsr
eal
l
yhi
m,I
t'
sfunnyIst
il
l
r
ememberhi
svoi
ce.He’
shol
dingme
cl
oseandIcanf
eel
hisbr
eat
hing
car
essi
ngmyf
ace.
“
Th.
.t
hanks”Ist
utt
erandt
ryt
oletl
ose
f
rom hi
m buthehol
dsmei
npl
ace.
“
Le.
.l
etmegonow”
“
Youhav
ebeaut
if
uley
esi
t’
sapi
tyt
hey
can’
tsee”Mymom al
way
stel
lmet
hatI
hav
ebeaut
if
ulhaz
eley
es.
“
Pleasel
etmego”Isaywi
thashi
ver
ing
v
oiceIcanf
eel
myhear
tpoundi
nghar
d
agai
nstmychest
.Hel
etsmego
“
Her
e”Hef
orcesmyhandt
otake
somet
hingandIt
ouchi
tandf
eel
that
i
t’
sadocumentt
hat
’swr
it
teni
nBr
ail
l
e
“
Whatshoul
dIdowi
tht
hese”
“
Wipey
ourass”Ihearhi
sfoot
steps
shuf
fl
ingaway
“
Asshol
e!”Imumbl
e
“
Whatdi
dyousay
?”ohno,
hehear
dme!
Idon’
tsayany
thi
ngbutmakemyway
home.Forsomeoddr
easonIcan’
twai
t
t
ogethomeandr
eadt
hisdocument
.
Thef
ir
stt
hingwhenIgethomei
stosi
t
downont
hechai
randst
art
sreadi
ng.To
sayI
'
m shockedi
sanunder
stat
ement
.
I
t’
shasal
lthei
l
legal
deal
i
ngsofMr
Khumal
o,v
eryi
ncr
imi
nat
ingst
uffIt
ell
y
oubutar
eal
ltheset
hingst
rue?Whoi
s
t
hatguy
?Whydi
dhegi
vet
heset
ome?
Whati
shepl
anni
ngt
oachi
eve?Howdi
d
hegethol
doft
hisi
nfor
mat
ion?What
doesheex
pectmet
odowi
thi
tandhow
doesheknowme?

.
Ther
enex
tinser
tfol
l
owwhenweget
200comment
s850l
i
kes.
HappyBi
rt
hdayAsal
i
ntoSal
l
yNt
akana&
Noz
ieMal
i
nga.

CHAPTER3
“
Ohwy
ou’
reback”Ij
umpupi
nfr
ight
“
I’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
tmeant
ost
art
ley
ou.
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngt
her
e”Mom say
sas
herf
oot
stepsnear
stowar
dsme.I
act
ual
l
ydon’
tknowwhatt
osayt
oher
andI
’
m ast
utt
eri
ngmess
“
Mir
awhatar
eyour
eadi
ngt
her
e”Idon’
t
t
hinkt
ell
i
ngmom aboutt
hisdocument
i
sagoodi
deaespeci
all
yaf
terI
’
vej
ust
r
eal
i
zedt
hatshehasnoi
ntent
ionof
l
eav
ingdadandbesi
des,
thi
scoul
dbe
f
alse.
“
Poems!
..
.YesGugugav
emesome
poemst
oreadwhenev
erImi
ssher
”I
managet
osay
,Ihopeshebuy
sit
.
“
Oht
hat
’ssosweet
,letmesee”
“
No!
”Ishout
,mymom knowshowt
o
r
eadBr
ail
l
e.
“
Imeany
oucan’
treadmom,
notbef
ore
I
’
ver
eadt
hem”
“
Youar
eabsol
utel
yri
ght
.Iwi
l
lmake
y
ourf
avour
it
esandwi
ch,
whi
tebr
ead
wi
thbut
terandpeanutbut
ter
”
“
Thanky
oumommy
,youknowy
ouar
e
t
hebestmom i
nthewhol
ewor
ld?
”Thi
s
womanhasbeent
hroughal
ot,
shewas
di
sownedbyherpar
ent
swhenshewas
v
eryy
oungandpr
egnantwi
thmeatt
he
ageof23y
ear
s.Shewasont
hest
reet
s,
al
oneandpr
egnant
.Ev
eni
nthose
di
ff
icul
tci
rcumst
ancest
het
houghtof
t
ermi
nat
ingt
hepr
egnancynev
ercame
t
ohermi
nd,
notev
ent
hesl
i
ght
est
.
Thr
oughal
loft
hatpai
nand
compl
i
cat
ionsofherpr
egnancy
,I’
m st
il
l
t
heappl
eofherey
es.Herl
ovef
ormei
s
bey
ondi
magi
nat
ionandI
’
m sogr
atef
ul.
I
t’
sti
meIshowmygr
ati
tudet
oher
,for
bei
ngt
hebestmot
hert
hatshei
sand
getheroutoft
hismar
ri
agebef
orei
t’
s
t
ool
ate.Idon’
tknowwher
etost
artbut
i
fthi
sinf
ormat
ioni
str
ue,
Ihav
etomeet
t
her
udeguyagai
nandf
indouthi
s
mot
ivesandt
heaut
hent
ici
tyoft
his
i
nfor
mat
ion.
“
Ncooomybabyt
hanky
ousomuch”
shepl
ant
sapeckonmyf
orehead,
Ithen
st
and.
“
Iwi
l
lgoputt
hesei
nmybedr
oom Iwi
l
l
r
eadt
hem l
ater
”
“
Okaybaby
”It
akemuf
fi
nandmakemy
wayt
othebedr
oom.I
’
m notsur
ewher
e
Icanhi
det
hisdocument
,needst
obe
somewhr
ewher
emom won’
tseei
t.I
t’
s
abi
tofami
ssi
on,
sinceshe’
stheone
cl
eani
ngmyr
oom.Thi
nkMi
ra!Thi
nk!
Undert
hebed,
that
’si
t!Ikneel
ont
he
f
loorandpushi
tundert
hebedt
henget
up.Ihopeshewon’
tfi
ndi
t.Iwal
kback
t
otheki
tchenandsi
tont
hechai
r.
“
Her
e’sy
oursandwi
chandgl
assofj
uice
i
nfr
ontofy
ou”She’
ssay
saf
terpl
aci
ng
myf
oodi
nfr
ontofme
“
ThanksMommydear
est
”Ist
arteat
ing
“
Sot
ell
memom,
whatdi
dyoudot
o
dad?
”
“
Hai
boMi
ra”
“
What
,Ij
ustwantt
oknow.Howdi
dyou
ki
ckhi
sass?Musaukungoqangama
t
ipsokul
waMamahawu”(
Stopbei
ng
st
ingywi
thf
ight
ingt
ips)Shel
aughs
“
Ohmyi
nnocentmi
racl
e.Idi
dn’
tki
ckhi
s
ass”Shemi
micsmyv
oiceand
cont
inues“
Yourf
atherandIwer
en’
t
f
ight
ingl
astni
ghtwewer
emaki
ngl
ove”
“
Huh?
”
“
Mir
awhenpeopl
ear
einr
elat
ionshi
p
t
heymakel
oveorshoul
dIsayt
heyhav
e
sex
?Atschool
theyt
aughty
ouabout
sexr
ight
?”
“
Ofcour
semom buti
sn’
tsexsupposed
t
obepl
easur
abl
enotmakeanol
dman
gr
oanl
i
keawoundedani
mal
”she
l
aughsonceagai
n.
“
Iti
sbuty
ouwi
l
lunder
standwheny
ou
ar
eol
derandi
nlov
e”
“
Thatwon’
thappenmom somakeme
under
stand”Idr
inkmyj
uiceandt
akea
bi
teofmysandwi
ch.
“
Whywon’
tithappen?
”
“
Whowi
l
lfal
li
nlov
ewi
thmet
hebl
i
ng
gi
rl
?I’
mtoomuchwor
kmom”
“
Babydon’
tev
ersayt
hatagai
n.Youar
e
nott
oomuchwor
kmybaby
.Noguy
woul
dnotf
all
foragem l
i
key
ou.
”May
be
she’
sri
ghtonl
yfut
urewoul
dtel
l
.
“
Tel
lmehowdi
dyouanddadmet
”
“
Iwasl
ooki
ngf
oraj
ob….
.”Icuther
shor
t
“
Imeanmybi
ologi
cal
fat
hermom”Ican
senset
heat
mospher
echangi
ng.She
doesn’
tli
ket
otal
kaboutdadandIdon’
t
knowwhy
.Iwantt
oknowmor
eabout
myf
atherandhi
sfami
l
y.
“
Ican’
tremember
”
“
Howi
sthatpossi
blemom,
didy
ouev
er
l
ovehi
mthough?
”
“
Howdi
dwegett
othi
stopi
cMi
ra?
”The
i
rr
it
ati
oni
nherv
oicei
sev
ident
.
“
Younev
ert
alkaboutdadmom.Iwant
t
oknowwhatki
ndofmanhewas.I
wantt
oimagi
nehowhel
ookedl
i
ke.
Whatabouthi
sfami
l
y?Dot
heyev
en
knowaboutme?
”
“
Mir
alett
hedeadResti
nPeace,
please
mychi
l
d”
“
ButMom…”
“
AymaanMi
ra!
!!
”Ij
umpabi
twi
thf
ri
ght
.
Idon’
tunder
standwhyev
eryt
imewe
t
alkaboutdadshebecomesbal
l
ist
ic.
Ther
estoft
hedayshe’
snott
alki
ngt
o
mesoIl
etherbeandl
i
stent
omusi
con
myphonewhi
l
esi
ngi
ngal
ong.At7pm
weeatsupperwhi
l
eli
steni
ngt
odad
goi
ngonabouthowhi
sdaywasatwor
k.
Bor
ing,
ify
ouaskme.Af
tersupperand
hel
pingmom wi
thdi
sheswegot
oour
separ
ater
oomst
osl
eep.Ican’
tsl
eep,
mymi
ndcan’
tseem t
ost
opt
hinki
ng
aboutt
her
udeguyandt
hei
nfor
mat
ion
hegav
eme.Whatar
ehi
smot
ivesand
whyme?Whatdoesheknowaboutme?
I
’
m di
stur
bedbymyr
ingi
ngphonesoI
t
akei
tandansweri
t.
“
Hel
l
o”
“
Heychomee”Gugusay
sont
heot
her
si
deoft
hel
i
newi
thahoar
sev
oice.Oh
mypoorf
ri
end,
shewascr
ying.
“
Hey
,ar
eyouokay
”I’
m notaski
ng
becauseI
’
m dumb,
Icanheart
hatshe’
s
notokaybutIneedconf
ir
mat
ion.
“
Iwi
l
lbef
inemyf
ri
end”shebr
eat
hes
outl
oudl
yandcont
inues“
Iwasj
ust
i
nfor
mingy
out
hatwear
ri
vedsaf
elyand
Imi
ssy
ousomuch”
“
Imi
ssy
out
oochomee.
..
I’
m sor
ryonce
agai
naboutRi
cky
”
“
GoshImi
sshi
m Mi
ra.Iwi
shhecan
answerhi
sphone”Herv
oicei
sbr
eaki
ng
shameman,
Iwi
sht
her
ewassomet
hing
Icandot
omakeherf
eel
bet
ter
.
“
For
getabouthi
m chomee,
he’
snot
wor
thi
t.Youwi
l
lfi
ndsomeonet
her
e”
shechuckl
es
“
Itdoesn’
twor
kli
ket
hatMi
ra,
youcan’
t
t
ell
yourhear
ttof
orgetandst
opl
ovi
ng
someone”ohwel
lwhatdoIknowabout
t
hatki
ndofl
ove.
“
I’
m sor
ry”
“
It
’sokayIunder
stand.
..
usal
ekanj
ani
?”
“
Imett
her
udeboyagai
nandhewas
r
udeonceagai
n”
“
Bast
ardwhatdi
dhesay
?Youshoul
d
hav
ewhi
phi
sasswi
thmuf
fi
nwenamy
f
ri
end”Il
augh
“
Nex
tti
meIshoul
ddoj
ustt
hat
”
“
Yesdon’
tlethi
m wal
kal
lov
ery
ounx
!
He’
ssuchawast
eyaz
.”Wecont
inue
andchatunt
ilsher
unsoutofai
rt
ime.

Thenex
tdayIwakeupf
eel
i
ngmor
ose
f
ornor
eason,
whatam Isay
ingof
cour
set
her
e’sar
easonwhyI
’
mfeel
i
ng
down.I
nfactt
her
e’smor
ethanone
r
eason.Myst
epdadi
sabusi
ngmymom
andshedoesn’
twantt
oleav
ehi
m.She’
s
endur
ingal
lthi
spai
nforust
ohav
ea
bet
terl
i
fe.Myoneandonl
yfr
iendj
ust
r
elocat
edandI
’
m her
eal
onenowwi
th
noonet
ohangoutwi
th.Mypeer
sar
e
busywi
thr
egi
str
ati
oni
nuni
ver
sit
iesand
col
l
egesbuther
eIam consumedwi
th
f
earofst
art
ingcol
l
egeandhav
ingt
o
meetnewpeopl
e.Mom doesn’
twantt
o
t
alkaboutmyf
atheroratl
eastshowme
hi
sfami
l
y.If
eel
li
keshe’
shi
ding
somet
hingf
rom me.Thent
her
e’st
he
my
ster
iousr
udeguy
,whogav
eme
document
sthatcar
ryheav
yinf
ormat
ion
ofwhi
chI
’
m notsur
eit
’saut
hent
icor
f
alse.Al
ltheset
hingsar
esucki
ngout
t
hel
i
fei
nme.If
eel
li
keI
’
m sl
owl
ybut
sur
elydr
owni
ng.

Idr
agmy
sel
foutofbedandt
akemuf
fi
n
bef
oreheadi
ngt
othebat
hroom.Idon’
t
ev
enhav
est
rengt
htosi
ngt
oday
.I’
m
emot
ional
l
ydr
ained,
onceI
’
m donewi
th
myhy
gienepr
ocessIgetdr
essedi
na
y
ell
owsummershor
tdr
essandsandal
s.
Imakemywayt
otheki
tchenandi
t’
s
seemsasi
fther
e’snoone.Justt
henher
heav
enl
yscentf
il
lsmynost
ri
ls.
“
Mor
ningbaby
”shesay
scheer
ful
l
yokay
she’
snol
ongermadatme.
“
Mor
ningMom”Isay
“
Yousounddown,
what
’swr
ong”Ishr
ug
myshoul
der
s,howcansheaskmet
hat
,
ev
ery
thi
ngi
swr
ong.
“
Wel
lyourf
atheri
staki
ngusoutf
or
br
eakf
astandsomeshoppi
ng.Ihope
t
hatwi
l
lcheery
ouup”
“
Ihopesot
oo”
“
Mor
ningpr
incess”
“
Mor
ningDad”
“
Aremyf
avour
it
egi
rl
sready
?”
“
Yeswear
e,r
ightbaby
”mom say
s
“
Yeah”
Wi
tht
hatsai
d,wemakeourwayt
othe
carandmi
nut
esl
atert
hecari
smov
ing.
West
artatMugandBeanf
ir
st.Doi
ng
shoppi
ngi
sal
way
sther
apeut
ic,
I’
m now
smi
l
ingandhav
ingf
unwi
thmymom as
wechangeoneout
fi
taf
tert
heot
heri
n
t
hef
it
ti
ngr
oomsanddadi
scompl
aini
ng
asal
way
s.Ohhowwi
shIcanseehow
beaut
if
ulwear
e,I
’
m enj
oyi
ng
nonet
hel
ess.Wespendal
mostt
he
whol
edayatt
hemal
landbyt
het
imewe
f
ini
shI
’
m soex
haust
ed.Wear
ri
veat
homeandchi
l
lint
hel
oungej
ust
chat
ti
ng.
“
Sti
l
lyouhav
en’
tdeci
dedwhatar
eyou
goi
ngt
ost
udyPr
incess”myst
epdad
ask
“
Yes”
“
Youneedt
omakeupy
ourmi
ndMi
ra,
t
imei
snotwai
ti
ngf
ory
ou”
“
I’
mtaki
ngagapy
ear
”
“
Gapy
earf
orwhat
,youdon’
tneedt
hat
”
Hesay
s
“
GoshDad,
stoppr
essur
ingmeokay
!”
“
Youar
erai
singy
ourv
oicenowMi
ra!
”
Mom shout
sIgetup“
Wher
ear
eyou
goi
ngy
ourf
atheri
sst
il
ltal
ki
ngt
oyou”
“
Thi
sconv
ersat
ioni
ssuf
focat
ingme,
I
’
m goi
ngt
ogetsomef
reshai
r”Ihead
outandt
akeawal
k,asI
’
m wal
ki
ngIcan
hearacarcomi
ngbehi
ndmeunt
ili
t
par
ksnex
ttome.
“
Dol
lfacegeti
nthecar
”myear
s
r
ecogni
zeshi
svoi
ceandmyhear
tski
ps
t
wobeat
s.
“
Greet
ingwoul
dhav
ebeenbet
ter
”I’
m
amaz
edathowImanaget
ospeak
wi
thoutst
utt
eri
ng
“
Geti
nthecar
”Ii
gnor
ehi
m and
cont
inuewi
thmywal
k.
“
Don’
tmakemecar
ryy
oui
nsi
det
hiscar
Dol
lface”whatdoest
hisguywantf
rom
me.
“
Stubbor
nhuh,
I’
m comi
ng”Iheart
he
cardooropeni
ngandcl
osi
ngt
henhi
s
scentf
il
lsmynost
ri
lsashi
sfoot
steps
near
sme.Myhear
tisgal
l
opi
ngandmy
kneesar
esoweak.Whati
shappeni
ng
t
ome?Whydoeshemakesmef
eel
li
ke
t
his?Wi
thamov
ethatsur
pri
sesme,
he
pi
cksmeupbr
idal
sty
leIwi
ggl
emy
sel
f
andscr
eam
“
Shutt
hef
uckup!
”Her
oar
sinmyear
sendi
ngchi
l
lsdownmyspi
ne.
“
Behav
e!”If
eel
hishandbuckl
i
ngmeup
andsecondsl
atehegetont
hedr
iver
seat
.
“
Pleasedon’
tki
l
lme,
I’
m beggi
ngy
ou”I
saywi
that
ear
yvoi
ce
“
Rel
axI
’
m notamur
der
er“
Thecarst
art
s
mov
ing
“
Wher
ear
eyout
aki
ngmet
o”Hedoesn’
t
sayany
thi
ng.Ipr
aywi
thi
nmy
sel
fformy
saf
ety
,tr
embl
i
ngi
nfear
.
“
Wear
eher
e”If
eel
thecarst
oppi
ng
t
hent
hedooropens.
“
Come”If
iddl
eformuf
fi
nbuthest
ops
me
“
Youwon’
tneedt
hatcome”Het
akes
myhandandhel
pmeoutoft
hecar
.I
t
houghthewi
l
lletgoofmyhandbuthe
doesn’
t.
“
Wher
ear
ewe?
”It
ryt
ofocusandl
i
sten
t
omysur
roundi
ngs.Ther
ear
epeopl
e
andt
reesar
ound,
Icant
ell
byt
hei
rsi
l
ent
soundt
heyar
emaki
ng.
“
Ther
ear
etr
eesi
nthi
spl
acer
ight
”Isay
al
l
owi
ngmysensest
oobser
vet
his
pl
ace.
“
Yeshowdoy
ouknow”Hesounds
sur
pri
sed
“
Ever
ythi
ngmakeasound,
youj
ustgot
t
oli
stenat
tent
ivel
y”
“
Mmm.
..
Wear
eint
hepar
k.”Thel
ast
t
imeIwasi
napar
kwas2y
ear
sago
Whendadwast
hissweetdaddynott
he
abusi
vedad.Heuset
otakemeher
ea
l
otandwewoul
dhav
efun.
“
Let
’sgopl
ayswi
ng”
“
Ican’
t”
“
Mir
aawungi
sindi
minay
ouwantmet
o
car
ryy
oui
nfr
ontoft
hesepeopl
e”
somehowIj
ustknowhewoul
ddot
hat
wi
thouthesi
tat
ionsowewal
kwher
ever
t
heswi
ngi
s
“
ButI
’
mreal
l
yscar
ed,
whati
fIf
all
”Iask
pani
cki
ng
”
Igoty
ou”Hel
i
ftsmeupandIwr
apmy
l
egsonhi
swai
stt
henhesi
tsdown.He
si
tsonwhi
chIassumei
saswi
ngandI
st
raddl
eshi
m
“
Hol
dmey
ouwon’
tfal
l
”Hest
art
sto
swi
ngI
’
m soscar
edbutt
hemor
ehe
swi
ngst
hemor
eIr
elaxandenj
oy
my
sel
funt
ilhest
ops
“
Howwasi
t?”
“
Amaz
ingandIenj
oyedmy
sel
f”
“
Iknewy
ouwoul
d,swi
nghasal
way
s
beenmyf
avour
it
e”Heget
supwi
thme
andputmedownt
henpr
oceedst
otake
myhandandweheadt
othebenches
wher
ewesi
tdown.
“
Whoar
eyouandwhydi
dyougi
veme
t
hati
nfor
mat
ion”
“
Fory
out
oknowwhatki
ndofamonst
er
ar
eyouandy
ourmom deal
i
ngwi
th”
“
Butwhyandhowdoy
ouknowme?I
s
ev
ery
thi
ngt
her
etr
ue?
”
“
Yes”
“
Idon’
tunder
stand,
whoar
eyouand
whatdoy
ouwantf
rom us?
”
“
Iwantt
ohel
pyouandy
ourmom Mi
ra”
“
Howdoy
ouknowmydad,
doeshe
hav
esomet
hingony
ou?Whywoul
dyou
hav
esuchi
nfor
mat
ionabouthi
m?”
“
Whodoesn’
tknowMrKhumal
oDol
l
f
ace?He’
swel
lknown”
“
Butst
il
l,
Idon’
tbuyy
ourst
ory
”Iam not
conv
incedaboutal
loft
his.
“
I’
m notsel
l
ingandwhet
hery
ouwi
pe
y
ourasswi
tht
hosedocument
sorbl
ow
y
ournoseIdon’
tcar
e”
“
Doy
ouhav
etobesor
ude?
”
“
I’
m notr
ude!
”Hesay
“
Youar
erude!
”
“
Nxy
ouknowwhatbi
tchwhat
ever
!I’
m
l
eav
ing!
”
“
Youcan’
tleav
emeher
eyoubr
ought
meher
e!”
“
Doy
out
hinkIcar
e?”
“
Tel
lmewhi
chpar
kthi
sis,
Iwi
l
lfi
ndmy
way
!”
“
Bye!Idon’
thav
eti
met
obaby
sitabl
i
nd
i
nsol
entbi
tch!
”Tear
swel
l
edupi
nmy
ey
esasIbr
eaki
ntomi
l
li
onspi
eces.He
gr
oansI
’
m notsur
einf
rust
rat
ionsor
pai
n
“
I’
m sor
ry.
..
goshI
’
m sosor
ry”Hewi
pes
myt
ear
s
“
Idi
dn’
tmeant
ohur
tyou,
I’
m aj
erk
pl
easef
orgi
veme”Ican’
ttel
li
fhe’
s
f
aki
ngi
tornot
“
Pleaset
ell
mewhi
chpar
kist
his”I
whi
sper
“
Ngi
yax
oli
saMi
ra,
Iwi
l
lyout
akehome”I
shakemyheadnoast
ear
sfal
ldownmy
f
ace
“
Pleasel
etmet
akey
ouhome.I
’
mver
y
sor
ry”If
eel
hisar
msenv
elopi
ngmy
body
.Hi
sar
msar
esowel
comi
ngand
f
orsomeoddr
easonIdon’
twanthi
mto
l
etmego.Ihol
dhi
mfordearl
i
fear
ound
hi
swai
standt
hat
’swhenIgett
ofeel
t
hest
ruct
ureofhi
sbody
.
“
Ngi
yax
oli
saMashwabada”(
I’
m sor
ry)
Heknowsev
enmycl
anbutIknow
not
hingabouthi
m notev
enhi
sname.
“
I’
m goi
ngt
otakey
ouhomeokay
”Inod
asIsni
ffhar
dtaki
ngal
lhi
sint
oxi
cat
ing
di
vi
nescent
.Hepul
l
smebackand
scoopsmeupi
nhi
sar
ms.Imustsayf
or
aski
nnyguyhehasener
gy.Heputme
i
nhi
scarIassumeandbuckl
emeup
t
hengot
ohi
ssi
deIpr
esume.Wef
all
i
ntocomf
ort
abl
esi
l
enceunt
ilt
hecar
st
opsmov
ing.
“
Wear
eher
enow.
..
I’
m sor
ry”Inodand
f
iddl
efort
hedoorhol
der
“
Wai
tIwi
l
lopeni
tfory
ou”Ihearhi
s
dooropeni
ngandcl
osi
ngt
henheopens
mi
ne.Hehel
pmeout
.
“
Thanky
ou,
youar
enotgoi
ngt
otel
lme
y
ourname”
“
What
’st
heusewenotgoi
ngt
osee
eachot
heragai
n”
“
Oh”Idon’
tknowwhyI
’
m hur
tbyt
his.I
meanIdon’
tknowt
hisguyandhej
ust
sai
dhear
t-
breaki
ngst
ufft
omemi
nut
es
ago.
“
YesIdon’
tthi
nky
ouwantt
oseeme
agai
nI’
m ant
otal
ass”y
esy
ouar
ebut
I
’
dcoul
ddowi
thy
ourcompany
“
Okayy
ouowemey
ournameatl
east
”
“
Lwandl
e..
.Lwandl
elwenkosi
Nkosi
”
“
Beaut
if
ulnamef
oranar
rogantr
udeass
l
i
key
ou”hechuckl
es
“
I’
m sor
ryDol
lface”
“
ByeLwenkosi
”Imakemywayi
nsi
de
t
hehouse.
“
Goody
ouar
eback!Wher
edi
dyouget
t
hisi
nfor
mat
ionIf
oundundery
ourbed
Mi
ra!
!”OhNo
“
Youwer
egoi
ngt
hroughmyst
uffnow”
“
Goi
ngt
hroughy
ourst
uffmyf
oot
!I
cl
eant
hatr
oom ofcour
seIwi
l
ltouch
ev
ery
thi
ng.Mi
rawhenwoul
dyoust
op
t
hishuh!Ar
eyoupl
anni
ngt
osendy
our
f
athert
ojai
l
?!”She’
sfumi
ngwi
thanger
“
Yes….
”shecut
smeof
f
“
Thener
vey
ouhav
etosayt
hat
,what
happenedt
othet
hingshehasdonef
or
ushuh!Whoi
sgoi
ngt
otakecar
eofus
i
fhegoest
ojai
l
?”
“
Wewi
l
lsel
lthi
shouseandbuyasmal
l
houset
hatwi
l
lbeenoughf
orbot
hofus
mom.May
bey
oucanst
artasmal
lfast
f
oodbusi
ness!
!”
“
Youar
esonai
vey
oul
i
ttl
echi
l
d!I
t’
snot
aseasyasy
ousay
!Thi
shousei
shi
sin
nameandwhathewoul
ddoi
ski
l
lyoui
f
hef
oundouty
oudi
ggi
nghi
sdi
rt
,yi
ni
ungenwey
ini
huh!
”
“
Whatabouthi
sex
-wi
fe?Hel
i
edt
ous
Mamahesai
dshedi
edoutofcancer
Kant
iheki
l
ledherandbur
iedher
!Ist
hat
whaty
ouwanthi
mtodot
oyouhuh!
!?
”I
f
eel
ahotst
ingi
ngsensat
iononmyf
ace
andt
earescapemyey
e.Ican’
tbel
i
eve
shej
ustsl
appedme.
“
Baby
…”Shet
ri
est
ohol
dmyhandbutI
y
anksi
tawayandmakemywayt
omy
bedr
oom t
henl
ockt
hedoor
“
Mir
aI’
m sor
rymychi
l
d”Shesay
sont
he
ot
hersi
deoft
her
oom.Iwal
ktomybed
andcr
awl
oni
tthencr
ymyl
ungsout
.
Myphoner
ingsIi
gnor
eitbutwhoev
eri
s
cal
l
ingi
sver
yper
sist
ent
“
Hel
l
o”Isaywi
thmycr
yingv
oice
“
Dol
lfaceI
’
m sor
rypl
easedon’
tcr
y”I
’
m
choki
ngonmyt
ear
s,Ican’
ttel
lhi
mthat
I
’
m notcr
yingbecauseofwhathesai
d
I
’
m ov
eri
tsoIl
ethi
m apol
ogi
zeand
pl
eadwi
thme,
eachwor
dfr
om hi
s
mout
hissoot
hingmyhear
tandIf
eel
myangerdi
ssi
pat
ing.

.
200comment
s850l
i
kes
CHAPTER4

Li
steni
ngt
ohersobsf
rom t
heot
her
r
oom sl
i
cesmyhear
tint
omi
l
li
ons
pi
eces.I
twasn'
tmyi
ntent
iont
osl
apher
.
Idon’
tknowwhatcameov
erme
becauseIhav
enev
erl
aidmyhandon
hernotev
enonceandt
hatmusthav
e
shockedher
.
“
Babyopenuppl
ease”Isayknocki
ngon
t
hedoor
.Thel
astt
hingIwanti
stosee
mydaught
ercr
ybecauseofme.The
t
houghtal
onei
sunbear
abl
e,Iwanther
happyal
lthet
imebutIguesst
hej
okei
s
onmebecausej
udgi
ngbyt
he
pr
edi
camentwear
einr
ightnow,
she’
s
nothappyatal
l
.Iknowmydaught
eri
sa
smar
tassbutIdi
dn’
tthi
nkshewoul
dgo
asf
arasdi
ggi
ngt
hedi
rtonmyhusband.
Idon’
tbl
amehert
hough,
she’
sdoi
ng
whatshet
hinksi
sbestf
orme,
justas
muchasI
’
m doi
ngwhatbestf
orhert
oo.
ThedayIf
oundoutIwaspr
egnanti
s
t
hedayIr
eal
i
sedt
hatImustst
opl
i
ving
f
ormy
sel
fandl
i
vef
orher
.Iknewt
hatI
hadt
odowhat
everi
t’
stakef
orherwel
l
bei
ng.Gr
owi
ngup,
Inev
erhadi
teasy
andIv
owedt
omy
sel
fthatIwi
l
ldo
what
everi
ttakesf
ormychi
l
dren’
swel
l
-
bei
ng.
Ist
il
lbel
i
evet
hatt
hedaymyal
l
owed
dadt
otakeasecondwi
fewast
heday
shef
ail
edusasherki
ds.Thatwast
he
daydadf
orgotaboutusanddeci
dedt
o
t
akecar
eofhi
sot
herf
ami
l
y.Weal
l
t
houghtdadwentt
otheci
tyt
owor
kfor
usonl
ytof
indouthehadawi
feand
chi
l
dren,
asonwhohappenedt
obe
ol
dert
henmyel
dersi
steranddaught
er
whohappenedt
obet
hesameageas
mymi
ddl
esi
ster
.Li
fechanged
i
mmensel
yaf
terdadmar
ri
edt
hesecond
wi
feandt
hingsgotwor
sewhent
hey
mov
edi
noury
ard.Dadbui
l
thi
sot
her
f
ami
l
yahousei
noury
ard.Iseewhathe
wast
ryi
ngt
odobuti
fyouaskme.I
t
wasst
upi
dbecausewewer
enev
er
goi
nggetal
ongespeci
all
ynotwhent
hey
wer
eget
ti
ngspeci
alt
reat
ment
.
Sasi
bonangamaphephaaseKFCl
yi
ng
i
nthey
ardwhi
l
ewewer
eeat
ing
cabbage.Theonl
yti
mewewoul
deat
meatwaswhendadwasgoi
ngt
ospend
t
heni
ghti
nourhouse.Iuset
obel
i
ke
Mi
ra,
quest
ioni
ngev
ery
thi
ngt
hatwas
happeni
ngar
oundandt
hatear
nedmea
l
otbeat
ingsf
rom mydadandmom
woul
dsaynot
hingaboutt
hat
.Angerand
r
esent
mentgr
ewwi
thi
nmeandt
he
dangerofbei
ngconsumedby
r
esent
mentandangeri
sthaty
ouar
ethe
onewhoi
shur
ti
ng,
mor
ethant
he
per
sony
our
esentandangerdoesmor
e
har
mtoy
out
hant
heper
sony
our
pour
ingat
.

Li
fehadt
ocar
ryont
houghandt
heonl
y
t
hingt
hatwaspushi
ngmewast
hesoul
t
hatIwascar
ryi
ngi
nsi
deofme.Ist
il
l
r
emembert
hedayt
heyt
oldmeshe’
s
deadandt
heyhadt
ooper
atemeIwas
bey
ondbr
okenbutI
’
m st
il
lsur
pri
sed
ev
ent
odaybyt
hef
actt
hatshemadei
t
outal
i
ve,
thehowst
il
lbeat
sme.Her
sur
viv
alwasami
racl
eal
thoughi
twas
t
raumat
ict
ofi
ndoutshehadnosi
ght
.I
wasscar
edandy
oungandIhadnoone
bymysi
det
ogui
deme.Mi
rawasnev
er
ahappyachi
l
dwhenshegr
ewup
especi
all
yaf
tersher
eal
i
zedt
hatt
he
wasdi
ff
erentf
rom herpeer
s.Whenshe
st
art
edschool
,It
houghtshewoul
d
war
m upt
ohersi
tuat
ionandmake
f
ri
endsbutst
il
lnot
hingchanged.
Mov
ingt
oDur
banaf
terVusi
hir
edmet
o
behi
shel
perwasabl
essi
ngbecausef
or
t
hef
ir
stt
imei
nyear
smydaught
er
st
art
edwar
mingupandsheev
enmade
af
ri
end,
Gugu.Iwasahappymot
her
.
Vusi
hadagr
eati
nfl
uenceonherandI
wassogr
atef
ul.Ir
eal
i
zedt
hatMi
ra
want
edaf
atherbutmyhusbandmade
mer
eal
i
zet
hebi
ggerpi
ctur
ewhi
chi
sI
hav
ebeenconsumedbyanger
,pai
nand
r
esent
mentandIwasadeadwoman
wal
ki
ng.Thatdi
dnotonl
yaf
fect
edme
butmydaught
eraswel
l
.ThedayI
deci
dedt
oletev
ery
thi
nggoandst
art
ov
erwast
hedayMi
rast
art
edwar
ming
upandsmi
l
ingl
i
keot
herchi
l
dren.
Vusi
muz
ihasbeennot
hingbutgr
eatt
o
meandmydaught
er.Hebr
oughthope
andhappi
nessi
ntomyl
i
feaswel
lasmy
daught
er’
s.

Ev
ery
oneofusi
sfi
ght
ingdemonsand
t
her
e’snot
hinghar
dasf
ight
ingi
nter
nal
bat
tl
es,
especi
all
yformen.Mendon’
t
wantt
oshowt
hei
remot
ionsandt
hey
hav
ethi
sment
ali
tyorr
athershoul
dIsay
t
heyar
eli
vi
ngupt
othesoci
etyst
igma
t
hatamanwhoshowshi
semot
ionsi
s
weak.Nomat
terhowdeepl
ytheysuf
fer
t
heyhadt
oactst
rong,
obl
i
vioust
othe
monst
ert
heyar
ebui
l
dingwi
thi
n
t
hemsel
ves.Myhusbandhada
t
raumat
icchi
l
dhooddeal
i
ngwi
th
phy
sical
andemot
ional
abuse.Hi
s
f
atherwasadr
unkar
dwhouset
obeat
t
hem al
lupi
ncl
udi
ngt
hei
rmot
her
.He
wast
heonl
yboyoutof3si
bli
ngs.Hi
s
t
wosi
ster
sranawaywi
tht
hei
r
boy
fri
endsandnev
ercamebackhome.
Onedayhi
smom gotsi
ckandshedi
ed
weeksl
ater
,that
'swhenhecamet
o
r
eal
i
sat
iont
hathehadt
ost
arthust
li
ng
f
orhi
msel
f.Hest
art
edbysel
l
ingweed
f
orsomemani
nhi
shoodwhogr
oomed
hi
mtobet
hishar
dcor
egangst
er.When
t
hemanpassedonhel
eftev
ery
thi
ngt
o
Vusi
tot
akeov
er,
hewasl
i
keasonhe
nev
erhad.

I
t’
sbeent
woy
ear
ssi
ncet
heabuse
st
art
edandeachdayIkeephopi
ngt
hat
hewoul
dst
op.Whenhei
sangr
yit
’sl
i
ke
hei
spossessedandt
hemomentr
eal
i
ty
hi
thi
m hebecomest
hissweetdar
li
ng,
t
hatmakesi
thar
dformet
onotf
orgi
ve.
I
’
m sur
eyouar
erol
l
ingy
ourey
esr
ight
nowt
hinki
ngI
’
m st
upi
dbuti
t’
snotas
easyasy
out
hink.Ir
ememberwhenI
t
oldhi
mthatI
’
m donet
heot
herday
,he
cr
iedandbegmet
ost
ay“
Youar
emi
ne
Bongaoursoul
sar
eint
ert
wined.You
can’
tleav
eme,
Ilov
eyousomuch.I
f
y
oudar
eleav
emeIwi
l
lsear
chf
ory
ou
andf
indy
ou.Iwi
l
lki
l
lyouandMi
rat
hen
ki
l
lmy
sel
f”AndIknowhemeantt
hose
wor
ds,
nomat
terwher
eIcangohe
woul
dfi
ndus.Vusi
isconnect
ed
ev
ery
wher
eI’
m st
uckwi
thhi
mfor
ever
.I
knowt
hathel
ovesmeandmydaught
er
Ial
sol
ovehi
m,t
heonl
ypr
obl
em i
shi
s
abusi
vebehav
ior
.

“
HoneyI
’
m home”Hei
sbackIl
ookat
t
hedocument
sinmyhand.Hecantsee
t
hem i
t’
sagoodt
hingt
hathecan’
tread
Br
ail
l
ebutIhav
etobur
nthem j
ustt
obe
sur
e.I
fhecoul
dknowt
hatMi
rai
s
di
ggi
nghi
sdi
rthel
lwoul
dbr
eakl
ose.I
wal
ktot
heguestr
oom andhi
det
he
documentt
her
ethenwal
ktoour
bedr
oom t
ocont
inuewi
thpacki
ngt
he
cl
otheswebought
.Thedoorswi
ngs
openandhi
sscentf
il
lsourbedr
oom
“
Ther
eyouar
e”It
il
tmyheadt
othesi
de
andl
ookathi
m wi
thasmi
l
eonmyf
ace
“
Mnt
ungwa”Hewal
kst
omeandgi
ves
meabr
eat
htaki
ngki
ss
“
Hel
l
omydear
estwi
fe”
“
Hi”Isaybr
eat
hlessl
yrecov
eri
ngf
rom a
ki
ss.
“
Youar
est
il
lgood?
”Inodwi
thmyhead
nott
rust
ingmyv
oice.Hest
udi
esmy
ey
eswhi
l
erunni
nghi
spal
msonmy
ar
ms
“
Tal
ktomemysweetdar
li
ng”
“
It
’sMi
ra,
thi
sthi
ngofhernotwant
ingt
o
got
oschool
iswor
ryi
ngme“Il
i
eof
cour
se,
howcanIt
ell
himt
hatmy
daught
erf
oundsomedi
rtonhi
m and
she’
sont
hemi
ssi
ont
otakehi
m on.
“
Don’
twor
rymyl
ove,
justgi
vehert
ime.
YouknowhowMi
rai
s,r
ememberwhen
shef
ir
stcameher
e,shedi
dn’
tli
kei
tbut
wi
tht
imeshegotbet
ter
.She’
sscar
edof
changeandwehav
etot
eachherhowt
o
adaptt
oanewenv
ironment
.”Thi
sis
oneoft
het
hingsIl
oveabouthi
m.
“
Iguessy
ouar
eri
ghtbaby
”If
akea
smi
l
e
“
Whati
sit
,Icanseet
her
e’ssomet
hing
el
se”
“
It
’snot
hingIhav
eaheadache”
“
I’
m noty
ourf
ool
Nokubongaoutwi
th
i
t!
”Ohl
ordher
egoeshi
stemper
.Iwant
t
oknowi
fher
eal
l
yki
l
ledhi
swi
febut
howdoIaskhi
m aboutt
hiswi
thout
hav
ingt
oment
ionMi
ra.
“
Uhm…y
ouknowwhenwewer
efi
tt
ing
cl
othesi
nthef
it
ti
ngr
oomsIhear
dsome
l
adi
est
alki
ngabouty
ou”Hechuckl
es
“
Ofcour
sel
adi
est
alkaboutmeImean
whowoul
dn’
twantt
hisey
ecandybut
t
heyar
ewast
ingt
hei
rti
mebecauseI
’
m
t
aken”
“
Theysai
dyouki
l
ledy
ourexwi
feand
bur
iedher
”Het
enseup
“
What
?”
“
Didy
ou?
”
“
Ofcour
senot
!Howcany
ouaskme
t
hat
!!
”
“
Don’
tshout
,Iwasj
ustaski
ngbaby
”
“
Becausey
oubel
i
evet
hem r
ight
?”
“
Nobaby
”
“
Lookmei
ntheey
esandt
ell
mey
ou
don’
tbel
i
evet
hem”It
ryt
ost
aredeepi
n
hi
sey
esandl
i
ebutt
hismanknowsme
l
i
keapal
m ofhi
shand.Ahugesl
ap
l
andsonmyf
acesendi
ngmer
eel
i
ng
backwar
dasI
’
m st
il
lrecov
eri
ngf
rom
t
hatpunchesf
oll
ows.He’
sshout
ingand
swear
ing,
nowI
’
m ont
hef
loort
ryi
ngt
o
bl
ockhi
ski
cksonmyt
ummywi
thmy
handsandscr
eami
ngmyl
ungsout
.I
don’
tknowwhendi
dthedooropenbutI
hear
dMi
racr
ying.
“
Stopi
tpl
easedaddyI
’
m beggi
ngy
ou,
ngi
yakut
usamnt
ungwa”Hel
ooksatmy
daught
ercl
enchi
nghi
sjawst
henwal
ks
t
oher
.
“
Vusi
pleasedon’
thur
ther
”It
ryt
oget
upf
rom t
hef
loorbutI
’
minsomuch
pai
n.Iscr
eam i
nagonyast
heshar
p
pai
nshooti
nmyabdomen.Het
urnst
o
l
ooksatme
“
Ineedt
ogot
ohospi
tal
Vusi
I’
mlosi
ng
hi
m!!
”
“
Losi
ngwho!
”
“
I’
m pr
egnantIwant
edt
otel
lyout
oni
ght
ov
erdi
nner
”He’
snotmov
ingI
’
m not
sur
ehehear
dmeornot
.
“
Vusi
muz
i”Her
eal
i
zet
hatI
’
m not
pl
ayi
ngandpani
cked,
minut
esl
aterwe
ar
edr
ivi
ngt
othehospi
tal
andIcanhear
hi
m say
ing“
Hangi
nther
ebaby
”Ina
di
stanceasIcanf
eel
mysel
flosi
ngmy
consci
ousness.Ihopemybabymakesi
t.
.
200comment
sand850l
i
kes.
CHAPTER5

Wehav
ebeenwai
ti
ngf
orawhi
l
enow
butnoonehascomet
hrought
otel
lus
what
’sgoi
ngonwi
thmymot
her
.Ican
heardad’
sfoot
stepspaci
ngupand
downIwi
shhecanst
opdoi
ngt
hat
,it
’s
f
reaki
ngmeout
.I’
m soscar
ed,
Ihope
mymom i
snotbadl
yinj
ured.
“
Dammi
twhyar
etheyt
alki
ngsol
ong!
!”
Heshr
iekscausi
ngmet
ojump.I
t’
snot
asecr
ett
hatI
’
m scar
edoft
hisman.I
wi
shmymom coul
dseehowdanger
ous
hei
sforher
.
“
I’
m sor
rysweet
hear
t,Idi
dn’
tmeant
o
scar
eyou”Hesay
swi
thasof
tvoi
ce,
the
angr
ybeastt
hatwasscr
eami
ngand
swear
ingmi
nut
esagoi
sgone.Howhe
managest
oswi
tchf
rom sweetmant
oa
monst
ert
oasweetmanagai
nisa
my
ster
ytome.Iswearev
enact
orscan’
t
beasgoodashi
m.
“
Her
eist
hedoct
orcomi
ng”Hesay
sand
Igetupf
rom t
hebench.
“
Dochowi
smywi
feandmybaby
?”
“
Yourwi
fei
sokaysi
rbutI
’
m sor
ryshe
l
ostt
hebaby
”Anunf
ami
l
iarv
oiceofa
mal
esay
s.Ican’
thel
pbutnot
icehow
r
eli
evedIam t
oheart
hatt
hebabydi
dn’
t
makei
tandi
tmakemef
eel
hor
ri
ble.
“
OhGod”Hesoundsdef
eat
edbutt
hisi
s
hi
sfaul
t.
“
Canweseeher
”
“
Yesbutdon’
tst
ayl
ong.I
’
m goi
ngt
o
keepherf
orov
erni
ght
”Ohnowhat
aboutmet
hismani
sgoi
ngt
oki
l
lmei
n
t
hathouseandbur
yme
“
Doy
ouhav
etokeepherdoct
or”Iask
“
Yesf
orobser
vat
ion”Ican’
tgobackt
o
t
hathouseal
onewi
tht
hisman.Myl
i
fe
maynotbegoi
ngwel
lri
ghtnowbutI
’
m
notr
eadyt
odi
e,noty
et.
“
Thanky
oudoct
orpl
easeshowusher
war
d”
“
Fol
l
owme”say
sthedoct
or
“
ComeMi
ra”Dadt
akesmyhandbutI
y
anki
taway
“
Doct
orcany
oupl
easeshowmemy
mot
her
’swar
d”Ihav
enev
erbeenher
e
bef
oreandI
’
mfr
eaki
ngout
.
“
It
’sokayMi
ssKhumal
ocome”Iwantt
o
t
ell
himt
hatI
’
m Mi
ssMt
himkhul
ubut
what
'st
hepoi
nt.Het
akesmyhandand
wemakeourwayt
omymom’
shospi
tal
r
oom.Icanhearabeepi
ngsoundofa
machi
ne.
“
MrsKhumal
o,y
ourdaught
eri
sher
e”
“
Thanky
oudoct
or”Mom say
sandt
he
doct
orl
etsgoofmyhand
“
Iwi
l
lcomet
ocheckuponMr
s
Khumal
o”
“
Nopr
obl
em doct
or”Icanheart
hat
she’
sinsomuchpai
nandherv
oicei
s
cr
acki
ng.
“
Mommyar
eyouokay
”
“
I’
m okaymybaby
,wher
e’sy
ourf
ather
?”
It
houghthewasf
oll
owi
ngus
“
He’
snotmyf
ather
!”
“
Woul
dyoust
opt
hispl
ease.Idon’
thav
e
ener
gyMi
ra,
Ijustl
ostmybaby
”she
br
eaksi
ntot
ear
sandmyhear
tsi
nks.
“
I’
m sor
ryMama”If
iddl
eforherhand
andsqueez
eit
.ThedooropensandI
cant
ell
thati
t’
sdadashi
sscentf
il
lst
he
r
oom.Hi
sfoot
stepsar
edr
aggi
ng
t
owar
dsus.
“
Bonga…”
Hewhi
sper
s,ohhesuddenl
y
l
ostav
oicenow.
“
Vusi
…”Hecut
sherof
f
“
IknowandI
’
m sor
rymybabyI
’
mreal
l
y
sor
rypl
easef
orgi
veme”
“
Ihav
efor
giv
eny
ouf
ormanyt
imesVusi
,
Ican’
ttaket
hisany
mor
eit
’st
oomuchi
f
i
ttakemyl
i
fei
tsel
ftobef
ree,
leti
tbe”
shebur
sti
ntoal
oudsob
“
Idon’
tdeser
vey
ou,
Iknowst
handwa
sami
pleasegi
vemeonel
astchance.I
swearI
’
m goi
ngt
ofi
ndhel
p.Iwi
l
lgof
or
counsel
i
ng,
ther
apy
,shr
ink,
past
or
any
thi
ngy
ouwant
,Ipr
omi
se”Ichuckl
e
t
hismangott
obeki
ddi
ngme
“
Hel
pforwhatex
act
ly?Whyar
eyou
t
alki
ngasi
fyouhav
eadi
seaset
hati
s
pushi
ngy
out
obeatmymom up”
“
Mir
apl
easeshutup”
“
Bot
hofy
ouar
esosel
fi
sh,
all
youcar
e
abouti
syour
sel
ves.May
bey
oubot
h
deser
vet
his”mom gasps
“
May
bey
ouwi
l
lnowr
eal
i
zet
hathehas
ki
l
ledt
hisbabyandy
ouar
enex
tmom.I
hopey
ouwi
l
lRestI
nPeaceknowi
ng
t
hatI
’
mlef
tal
onesuf
fer
ingbecauseof
y
ou.Asf
ory
oudadIhopey
ouwi
l
l
r
eal
i
zehowmuchofamonst
ery
ouar
e
f
orki
l
li
ngani
nnocentsoul
.Yourown
babyIhopey
ouwi
l
lsl
eepatni
ght
.Ihat
e
y
ou,
bot
hofy
ou!
”If
indmywayout
t
otal
l
yignor
ingmom asshecal
l
soutf
or
me.Ibumpi
ntosomeone
“
I’
m sor
rycany
oupl
easehel
pmef
ind
mywayout
,,
Ineedsomeai
r”
“
Nopr
obl
em si
s”Shet
akesmyhandand
wewal
koutoft
hehospi
tal
.
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Arey
ousur
eyouwi
l
lbeokayher
e”
“
Yes”Ther
e’snowayI
’
m spendi
nga
ni
ghtwi
tht
hatmanal
one.Iwi
l
lrat
her
sl
eepont
hest
reet
.OhhowIwi
shGugu
washer
e.It
akemyphonef
rom my
pocketandcal
luncl
eSox
.
“
Hel
l
o”Av
oiceofal
adysay
sont
het
her
si
deoft
hel
i
ne.
“
Hi,
canIspeakt
oUncl
eSox
”
“
He’
sbusy
”
“
Ohpl
easet
ell
him Mi
racal
l
ed”
“
OkayBy
e”Shehangsupbef
oreIev
en
sayany
thi
ng.i
t’
sget
ti
ngcol
dnow,
I
cont
empl
ateoncal
l
ingLwenkosi
,hei
s
asgoodasast
ranger
,whyam Iev
en
consi
der
ingt
hisbutwhati
fhecoul
d
hel
p.Ical
lhi
m andheanswer
sont
he
t
hir
dri
ng
“
Dol
l
face”Hear
inghi
svoi
cegotme
emot
ional
,Ibur
sti
ntot
ear
s.
“
That
’si
t,I
'
m comi
ngnow.wher
ear
e
y
ou?
”I’
m st
ruggl
i
ngt
out
terwor
ds
cor
rect
lyasI
’
m cr
ying
“
Hangi
nther
eokay
”Hehangsup,
Igo
downonmybut
tandpl
acemuf
fi
nnex
t
t
omet
henhugmyknees,
let
ti
ngouta
r
iveroft
ear
s.

“
Dol
l
face”Ipul
lmyhead
“
Lwenkosi
thatwassof
ast
”
“
WhenIhear
dyoucr
ying,
Ijustl
ostmy
mi
nd.St
opcr
yingnowI
’
m her
e”If
eel
his
handsscoopi
ngmeupt
henhewal
ks
wi
thme.Hepl
acesmegent
lyont
he
seatandbuckl
esmeup
“
I’
m goi
ngt
ogogety
ourst
ickI
’
m
comi
ngy
ezwa”secondsl
aterIhearhi
m
get
ti
ngi
nthecarandcl
osi
ngt
hedoor
.
“
Doy
ouwantmet
oswi
tchont
he
heat
er”
“
Yespl
ease”
“
Wher
eto?
”
“
Idon’
tknowbutIdon’
twantt
ogo
home”Thecarst
art
smov
ing
“
Okay
..
.whathappened?
”
“
Mom hadami
scar
ri
age”Isaywi
ping
myt
ear
s
“
Oht
hat
’shor
ri
ble,
I’
m sor
ry”
“
Yeah”
“
Youdontseem l
i
key
oucar
e”Hesay
s
“
Idon’
twanthert
ohav
eanot
herchi
l
d”
“
Whynot
?”Thecur
iosi
tyi
nhi
svoi
cei
s
ev
ident
“
Shewi
l
lfor
getaboutmeandl
oveher
ot
herchi
l
d”
“
Idon’
tthi
nkt
hat
’st
rueDol
l
face,
your
mom l
ovesy
ou”
“
Ofcour
seshel
ovesmebutt
hatmi
ght
changet
hemomentshehasababywho
i
snotbl
i
ndl
i
keme.
”
“
Dol
l
faceImaynotknowy
ourmot
her
t
hatmuchbutgener
all
y,mot
her
slov
e
t
hei
rchi
l
drenequal
l
y.Hav
inganot
her
chi
l
ddoesn’
tmeant
heywi
l
lst
opl
ovi
ng
t
heot
herones”
“
May
bey
ouar
eri
ght
”
“
IknowI
’
mri
ght
”
“
Howdi
dyouknowwhi
chhospi
tal
Iam
at
”
“
Ihadt
olocat
eyout
hroughy
ourphone”
“
Ifeel
li
key
ouar
est
alki
ngmewher
edi
d
y
ougetmynumber
”
“
Doesi
tmat
ter
?”
“
Ofcour
se,
Lwenkosi
whoar
eyouand
whatdoy
ouwantf
rom me”Hel
aughs
“
Don’
ttel
lmey
ouar
escar
edofme”
“
Youar
easgoodasast
rangert
ome
andIdon’
tknowwhydi
dIev
encal
l
ed
y
ou”
“
Dil
i
kake!
”(Getof
fthecart
hen!
)
“
Uh.
ahIwasst
il
lwonder
ingwher
eist
he
r
udeboy
”
“
Nx!
”Isaynot
hing,
Idon’
twantt
opi
ss
hi
m mor
e.Ther
estoft
hedr
ivei
ssi
l
ence
unt
ilt
hecarst
opsmov
ing.Ihearhi
m
get
ti
ngoutoft
hecar
“
Come”
“
Wher
e’smuf
fi
n”
“
Whoi
sthat
?”Heasks
“
Mycane”
“
Youcal
lyourcanemuf
fi
n”hesounds
amaz
ed
“
Yes”
“
AwkodaMi
rausungaz
eubi
zei
nduku
ngemuf
fi
nsi
khonat
hina”(
Didy
ouhav
e
t
ocal
last
ickwi
thmuf
fi
nwhi
l
eI’
m her
e)
Hesay
slaughi
ngandIj
oinhi
m
“
Youar
enotmyl
i
fesav
ermoswena
andy
ouar
esor
udey
oudef
ini
tel
ydon’
t
qual
i
fyt
obemymuf
fi
n”
“
Mxm!
”Igi
ggl
e
“
Uyi
nhl
amanj
ewena”(
youar
eadough)
“
Comel
et’
sgo”
“
Wher
ear
ewe?
”
“
Myhome”
“
Mmhwher
e’smuf
fi
n”Hehel
psmeout
andgi
vesmemuf
fi
nthent
akesmyhand
aswemakeourwayi
ntot
hehouseI
pr
esume.Wecanhearv
oicesaswe
makeourwayi
n
“
Theyar
eint
hel
i
vingr
oom”myhear
t
st
art
sbeat
ingf
ast
“
Not
akemehome,
Ishoul
dn’
tbeher
e”
I
’
mtal
ki
ngf
astIcan’
tev
enhearmy
sel
f
“
Mir
abr
eat
hokay
,justbr
eat
hinandout
”
Idoashesay
“
Goodnowr
elaxmypar
ent
swon’
tbi
te
y
ou”Icanf
eel
mykneesweakeni
ngas
wewal
ktot
hel
i
vingr
oom.Themoment
wewal
kint
heyst
oppedt
alki
ngI
’
m sur
e
t
heyar
est
ari
ngatusr
ightnow.The
goodt
hingaboutbei
ngbl
i
ngy
oucan’
t
seewhoi
sst
ari
ngy
ou.
“
HeyGuy
s“Igr
eetaf
terhi
m
“
Mom,
Pops,
Gogot
hisi
sMi
ra.
..
Mir
a
Mt
himkhul
u”
“
Hel
l
obaby
”say
sawomanwi
thasweet
v
oice
“
Ohshe’
ssobeaut
if
ulcomet
oMama”I
hol
dont
oLwenkosi
’
shandsI
’
m so
ner
vous
“
Don’
tbescar
edkot
iyouar
ewel
come”
Say
sav
oiceofamanIsupposet
hati
s
hi
sfat
her
.
“
AwkodwaLwandl
elwenkosi
besekuphel
eamont
ombaz
aney
ini
usi
l
ethel
ainf
ama”(
OutOfgi
rl
sdi
dyou
hav
etobr
ingusabl
i
ndgi
rl
)Isuppose
t
hati
shi
sgr
andmot
her
.Idon’
tli
keher
al
ready
.
“
Ma!
!”Lwenkosi
’
sfat
hershout
satt
he
ol
dlady
“
Izasi
s”(
comesi
s)Say
sLwenkosi
’
s
mom assheenv
elopesmei
nherar
ms.
She’
ssmel
lsoni
ce.
“
Akamhl
emaan”(
She’
ssobeaut
if
ul)
shepl
ayswi
thmycheeks.Themanal
so
gi
vesmeahugt
henLwenkosi
hel
psme
si
tdown.
“
But
iyoudi
dn’
tint
roduceme”At
inyl
i
ttl
e
v
oiceSay
s
“
Ohmunchki
nI’
m sor
ry.Mi
rat
hisi
smy
l
i
ttl
esi
sterSnot
hando,
munchki
nthi
sis
Mi
ra”
“
Yourgi
rl
fr
iend?
”Ther
oom er
upt
swi
th
l
aught
erasIbl
ush.Howol
dist
hisl
i
ttl
e
gi
rlt
oasksuchquest
ions
“
Yes,
sayhi
toMi
ra”InudgeLwenkosi
nex
ttomef
orsay
ingI
’
m hi
sgi
rl
fr
iend
andhel
aughs.
“
Hel
l
oMi
ra”If
eel
hert
inyhandsonmy
handsandpi
ckherupmaki
nghersi
ton
myl
ap.
“
Heybabygi
rl
,howar
eyou”
“
I’
mfi
net
hanksandy
ou”
“
I’
m al
sof
ine,
youhav
ebeaut
if
uley
es”
“
Thanky
ousomuchI
’
m sur
eyouar
e
al
sobeaut
if
ul.Howol
dar
eyou”
“
I’
m si
xyear
sol
dandwhatdoy
oumean
y
ousur
eI'
m beaut
if
ul,
ofcour
seI
’
m
beaut
if
ul”Igi
ggl
e
“
Yesy
ouar
emunchki
nbutMi
racan’
t
seey
oubecauseshe’
sbl
i
nd”
”
Ohshame,
I’
m sor
ryMi
ra”Icanhear
t
hatshe’
shur
t
“
Don’
tbesor
rybabygi
rl
,i
t’
sokay
”
“
Whathappenedt
oyourey
es”t
hel
i
ttl
e
munchki
naskscur
iousl
y
“
Iwasbor
nbl
i
nd”Isay
“
Howdoy
oumov
ear
ound?
”
“
Iuset
hisst
icki
thel
pst
omel
ocat
e
t
hingsbef
oreIgett
othem”
“
Doy
ouknowhowt
oreadorwr
it
e?”
“
YesIknowbutwheni
t’
swr
it
tenwi
th
Br
ail
l
e”
“
Whati
sBr
ail
l
enow?
”
“
Ayaymunchki
nst
opaski
ngMi
ra
quest
ions”Lwenkosi
Say
s
“
It
’sokayIdon’
tmi
ndr
eal
l
y..
.Br
ail
l
eisa
sy
stem ofmaki
ngr
aiseddot
sonpaper
t
ofor
mlet
ter
sandwor
dst
hatar
eread
byt
hebl
i
ndwi
tht
hei
rfi
nger
ti
ps.
”
“
Doy
oucr
ynor
mal
tear
s?”
“
Ofcour
se,
tear
scomef
rom Lachr
ymal
gl
andsort
eargl
andsout
sidet
heey
e
bul
bthatcont
ainst
hel
ayer
sort
he
sur
facesr
esponsi
blef
orr
ecor
dingl
i
ght
andcapt
uri
ngi
magest
hatar
e
t
ransmi
tt
edt
othebr
aint
hrought
he
opt
icner
ve,
thei
nfor
mat
iont
hus
col
l
ect
edi
sint
erpr
etedasv
isi
on.
”
“
Doy
oudr
eam atni
ght
?”
”
Hay
iSnot
handoi
mibuz
oengaka!
”(So
muchquest
ions)Lwenkosi
say
swi
th
annoy
ance
“
Thechi
l
discur
iousl
etherbepl
ease.
”
“
YesIdobutIhav
eaudi
tor
ydr
eams
onl
ybecauseIwasbor
nbl
i
nd”
“
Whatar
eaut
orydr
eamsMi
ra”
“
Audi
tor
ynotaut
ory
”
“
I’
m nott
alki
ngt
oyoubut
i”Webur
st
i
ntol
aught
er
“
Uyaphaphawena!
”
“
Nawe!
”Wel
aught
henIr
espondt
omy
l
i
ttl
eint
erv
iewer
.
“
Aredr
eamswi
thnopi
ctur
esj
ustt
he
mov
ementofpeopl
eandev
ery
thi
ngbut
aper
sonwhowasnotbor
nbl
i
ndand
somehowgotbl
i
ndl
atercansee
pi
ctur
est
het
imehe/
shehadsi
ght
.The
f
acesoft
hepeopl
esheoncesawmay
bebl
ur”
“
Doy
ouwi
shy
oucoul
dsee”
“
YesbutI
tiswhati
tis”Shecar
ri
esont
o
askmeot
herquest
ions,
mucht
o
Lwenkosi
’
sdi
sappr
oval
butheneedst
o
buz
zof
f.Lwenkosi
’
smom gi
vesme
bi
scui
tsandj
uice.Theyar
ereal
l
yni
ce
peopl
eex
ceptt
hegr
andmot
herwho
coul
dn’
tst
opmaki
ngsni
decomment
s.I
don’
tunder
standwhatherpr
obl
em i
s
butot
hert
hant
hat
,theNkosi
’
sar
eni
ce
t
ohangoutwi
th.Lwandl
elwenkosi
i
nfor
mst
hem t
hatI
’
m goi
ngt
ospenda
ni
ghtandt
heydon’
tseem t
ohav
ea
pr
obl
em wi
tht
hatex
ceptt
he
gr
andmot
her
.

Myphonecoul
dn’
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ingi
ngIhadt
o
swi
tchedi
tof
f.At7:
30weeatsupper
whi
l
etheyar
ewat
chi
ngt
vbecauseI
woul
dn’
tsayI
’
m wat
chi
ngwi
thoutaudi
o
descr
ipt
ion.I
t’
snoteasyt
ofol
l
owa
showj
ustbyl
i
steni
ngt
owhat
’sgoi
ngon.
Audi
odescr
ipt
ioni
sthenar
rat
ionof
v
isual
element
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dot
her
wise
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blet
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th
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isi
onl
oss.Aspeci
all
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ainednar
rat
or
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her
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aki
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ace.The
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isual
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ipt
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aci
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sical
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ks,
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CBSof
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orsomeof
t
hei
rpr
ogr
ams.Mor
eTVnet
wor
kswi
l
l
begi
nof
fer
ingaudi
odescr
ipt
ioni
nthe
nearf
utur
e.Themenut
oaccesst
hese
set
ti
ngsar
eent
ir
elyv
isual
soweneed
assi
stancef
rom someonewhoi
s
si
ght
edt
otur
nont
hisf
eat
ure.Audi
o
descr
ipt
ioni
sal
soav
ail
abl
einmov
ie
t
heat
ersandl
i
veper
for
mances.Peopl
e
whowi
sht
oli
stent
otheaudi
o
descr
ipt
ionatmov
iet
heat
ersor
per
for
mingar
tst
heat
ressi
mpl
yrequest
aspeci
alheadsetandr
ecei
verpr
ovi
ded
byt
hef
aci
l
ity
.Whi
l
eaudi
odescr
ipt
ion
soundt
racksf
ormov
iesandTVshows
ar
epr
e-r
ecor
ded,
li
veper
for
mancesar
e
descr
ibedbyl
i
venar
rat
orswhoar
e
wat
chi
ngt
hepl
ayi
nasepar
ateboot
h.
Bei
ngbl
i
ndorv
isual
l
yimpai
reddoesn’
t
meanwecannotordonotenj
oy
t
elev
isi
on,
themov
iesort
heat
re
per
for
mances.Byusi
ngouri
magi
nat
ion
aswel
lashav
ingaccesst
oaudi
o
descr
ibedmedi
a,wecanenj
oyTV,
the
mov
iesandt
heat
reasmuchast
hose
wi
thsi
ght
.Notev
ery
oneneedsorwant
s
t
owat
chshowswi
thaudi
odescr
ipt
ion,
butf
ormei
t’
swonder
ful
toknowt
hat
t
hisopt
ioni
sincr
easi
ngl
yav
ail
abl
e
t
hankst
onewr
egul
ati
ons.
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
wil
lshowy
out
he
guestr
oom sweet
y”
“
Shewi
l
lsl
eepi
nmybedr
oom mom.I
’
m
sur
ethat
'swher
eshewoul
dfeel
comf
ort
abl
e”
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
,Ihopey
ouar
enot
pl
anni
ngt
ohav
esexi
nmyhouse”The
f
athersay
s
“
GeeeDad!
”
“
Whati
ssexdaddy
?”asksSnowi
thher
squeakyv
oice
“
It
’sadanger
ousgamesweet
hear
t”The
mot
hersay
stot
hechi
l
d.It
ell
Lwenkosi
t
hatIwantt
osl
eep.Wesayour
goodni
ghtt
henwal
ktohi
sbedr
oom.Hi
s
r
oom i
sfi
l
ledwi
thhi
sdev
inescent
.
“
Wel
lIdon’
tdopj
ssoher
eisi
smyt
-
shi
rtandbox
er”
“
Thanky
ou”It
aket
hecl
othes
“
Iwi
l
lbei
nthebat
hroom cal
lmewhen
y
ouar
edone”Inodandwai
tunt
ilI
coul
dn’
thearhi
sfoot
stepst
hen
changedi
ntohi
st-
shi
rtandbox
ert
hat
’s
smel
l
sofhi
sper
fume.
“
I’
m done!
”IshoutandIhearhi
m
maki
nghi
swayi
n.
“
Thebat
hroom i
sony
ourr
ighthand
si
de”
“
Thanks”Hehel
psmegeti
nbedIdon’
t
knowi
fhet
hinksIcan’
tdot
hatonmy
ownorhei
sjustbei
ngcar
ing.
“
Iwoul
dbeont
hecouchi
fyouneedme.
I
t’
sont
hef
arl
eftsi
deofy
ourhand”
“
Doy
oumi
ndhol
dingmeunt
ilIf
all
asl
eep”
”
Ofcour
senot
”If
eel
him get
ti
ngnex
tto
meandpul
l
smeonhi
schestwr
appi
ng
hi
sar
msar
oundmybody
.
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Mir
a”
“
Cany
oupl
easehel
pmet
akedownmy
st
epdad”her
eleasesahugesi
gh
“
Arey
ousur
eaboutt
hat
”
“
YesbutIwantt
oknowi
fIcant
rust
y
ou”
“
Ofcour
sey
oucant
rustmeDol
l
face”
Her
unshi
sfi
nger
sti
pst
hroughmyhai
r
causi
ngasoot
hingsensat
ion.
“
Buty
ouhav
etoknowt
hati
twon’
tbe
easyandi
t'
sdanger
ous”Hesay
s
“
Idon’
tcar
e,Iwanthi
m outofourl
i
ves”
“
Iwi
l
ldowhat
everi
ttakes”
”
Howol
dar
eyou?
”
“
Justt
urned19l
astweek”
“
Happybel
atedbi
rt
hday
”
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Yourhear
tisbeat
ingf
astar
eyou
scar
ed?
”Iask
“
Ofwhat
?”
“
Me”Hel
aughs
“
Ohpl
easewoman,
youdon’
tscar
eme”
“
Liar
!”
”
Hai
sukasl
eepnow”
“
Singmeasong”
“
I’
m noty
ournanny
”
“
Youknowhowt
ospoi
lgoodmoment
s
wenawhyu-
somar
a”Hel
aughs
“
Iwi
l
ltel
lyout
hedayIqual
i
fyt
obe
muf
fi
n”Igi
ggl
e
“
Ahwel
lgoodni
ghtmydough”He
l
aughs
“
Atl
eastt
her
e’sMY”Ichuckl
e

Thebi
rdsar
echi
rpi
ngout
sideandIj
ust
knewi
t’
sthenex
tmor
ningIcanf
eel
somet
hingpoki
ngmybut
tdi
stur
bingme
onmysl
eep.Icandowi
thsomesl
eep
wechatandj
okear
oundal
mostt
he
whol
eni
ght
.Itwasr
eal
l
yfun,
hecanbe
ni
cewhenhewant
.
It
ouchi
tandf
ondl
eit
,omgi
t’
sbi
g,har
d
andl
ongIj
umpoutofbedl
i
keaspeed
ofl
i
ghtscr
eami
ng
“
Mir
awhat
’swr
ong?
”AsksLwenkosi
wi
thhi
ssl
eepyv
oice.
“
Asnake!
”
“
Asnakehuh?
”
“
Ther
e’sasnakei
nthebed
Lwandl
elwenkosi
!!
”
“
Ther
e’snosnakecomeher
eandl
et’
s
sl
eep”
“
Ifel
titokay
!!I
t’
slong,
bigandhar
doh
l
ordpl
easet
akemehomeIdon’
twant
t
obebeat
enbysnakes”I
’
m shaki
ng
wi
thf
ear
,hebur
sti
ntol
aught
erIdon’
t
knowwhat
’sf
unnynow.If
eel
hisar
ms
wr
appi
ngar
oundmeandIj
umpabi
t
“
HeyRel
axt
her
e’snosnake”Hest
rokes
myback
“
Ifel
titLwenkosi
”
“
ItwasnotasnakeDol
l
face,
itwasmy
cock”
“
Yourwhat
?”
“
Mypeni
s”
“
Youar
ely
ingt
hatwasasnakey
our
peni
scan’
tbet
hatl
ongandhar
d
Lwandl
elwenkosi
”Hepul
l
smebackand
t
akesmyhandt
henpl
acei
ton.
..
OMGI
gaspandr
emov
emyhandl
i
kei
ts
bur
ning.Heshr
iekswi
thl
aught
er.“
Gosh
asnakewow!y
ouj
ustmademyday
Dol
l
face”Hei
scackl
i
ngl
i
keal
i
ttl
eki
d,
annoy
ingt
hehel
loutme.
.
200comment
s&850l
i
kes
CHAPTER6

Idon’
tknowwhat
'ssof
unnybecauseI
di
dn’
tknowt
hatwashi
speni
s.Ihav
e
nev
eri
magi
nedi
tcoul
dbet
hatsi
ze.I
wonderhowt
heykeept
hist
hingi
nthei
r
pant
s,Imeani
t’
sapr
ivat
epar
tri
ghtso
peopl
edon’
thav
etoseei
t.Hei
sst
il
l
l
aughi
ngandIf
eel
li
kepul
l
ingsomej
uda
kar
ateonhi
m.Don’
taskmehowIknow
j
udakar
atebecauseIdon’
tknowi
tbuta
gi
rlgott
omakeapl
an.
“
It
’snotf
unny
!”
“
Ohi
tis.Outofal
lthi
ngs,
asnake
Dol
l
face”Hesay
slaughi
ng
“
Iwasj
oki
nghawuwhodoesn’
tknowa
peni
s”Idef
endmy
sel
fthatmakehi
m
l
aughev
enmor
e
“
Youdon’
twantmet
oanswert
hatdo
y
ou”
“
Mxm!
”I’
m superannoy
ednow
“
Youar
esocut
ewheny
ouar
e
mad.
..
comeher
e”Hepul
l
smet
ohi
s
ar
ms,
annoy
edasIam,
Ihol
dhi
m.I
don’
tknowany
thi
ngaboutheav
enbut
hi
sar
msmakemef
eel
li
keI
’
minasaf
e
heav
en.Ii
nhal
etaki
ngal
lhi
sscenti
n
mynost
ri
lsgoshheev
ensmel
l
s
heav
enl
y.Imov
emyhandsonhi
sbar
e
backgoi
ngdownIgaspwhenIf
eel
his
bar
ebut
t.Hegr
oansandIpushhi
m
back
“
Whyar
eyounotwear
inganyundi
es
Lwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Ican’
tsl
eepwi
thmyanypi
ececl
othi
ng
i
nmybody
”
“
Youar
ely
ingy
ouwantt
otr
ickmeand
hav
esexwi
thme!
”Hechuckl
es
“
OhmyDol
l
face,
Iwon’
ttr
icky
out
ohav
e
sexwi
thme.Youar
etheonewhowi
l
lbe
beggi
ngf
ori
t,t
rustme”
“
I’
m notgoi
ngt
ohav
esexwi
thy
ou!
”
“
Okayi
fyousaysobuty
oudon’
thav
eto
shout
”Her
ubshi
spal
msonmyar
ms
andpul
lmecl
oset
ohi
msel
f.It
hinkI
’
m
addi
ctedt
ohi
shugs.
“
I’
m sor
ryf
ormaki
ngy
ouf
eel
uncomf
ort
abl
ebutI
t’
sthet
rut
h,Ican’
t
sl
eepwi
thanypi
eceofmycl
othesev
en
i
nwi
nterIr
atheraddbl
anket
sorusemy
el
ect
ri
cbl
anketwheni
t’
scol
d”He
soundssosi
ncer
esoIbel
i
evehi
m.
“
Comel
et’
ssl
eep,
It’
sst
il
lear
ly”He
scoopsmeupandwal
kwi
thme.He
gent
lyt
uckmei
nthensl
i
psnex
ttome
pul
l
ingmet
ohi
schest
.Thepl
anwast
o
f
all
asl
eepagai
nforaf
ewhour
sbutwe
endedupchat
ti
ng.Hecomesf
rom a
wel
ltodof
ami
l
y,hi
sfat
herownsachai
n
ofbusi
nessandhi
smom i
sadoct
or.He
hadt
wosi
bli
ngsbuthi
sbr
otherpassed
onl
asty
ear
.Thewayhet
alksabouthi
s
ol
derbr
othery
oucant
ell
thathewas
v
erycl
osewi
thhi
m.May
behav
ing
si
bli
ngsi
snotabadt
hingy
az.Hei
s
doi
ngf
ir
sty
eardr
amat
ici
nar
tatAFDA.
“
Youwi
l
lmakeagoodv
il
lai
ninamov
ie”
Hel
aughs
“
Whyav
il
lai
nthough”
“
Youar
erudeandar
rogant
”Hechuckl
es
“
Buti
m notcr
uel
Dol
l
face”
“
Yourar
roganceandr
udenessi
scr
uel
”
Hebur
sti
ntol
aught
er
“
Ist
her
esuchat
hingt
hough”Igi
ggl
e
nowi
t’
smyt
urnt
oshar
eandI
’
m
amaz
edhowIf
indi
teasyt
otal
ktohi
m.
“
Sowhataboutt
hisy
earar
eyougoi
ng
t
ost
udysomet
hing?
”
“
Noi
mtaki
ngagapy
ear
”Honest
lya
gapy
eari
snotr
eal
l
ysomet
hingIwant
.I
can’
thel
pmy
sel
f,It
hinki
t’
sgoi
ngt
obe
abl
essi
ngi
ndi
sgui
set
houghbecauseI
wi
l
lhav
emor
eti
met
ofocusonbr
ingi
ng
downmyst
epdad.Idon’
tknowwhybut
If
eel
li
keIhav
etoask
“
Doy
ouhav
eagi
rl
fr
iend?
”
“
No”Thati
snotwhatIex
pect
ed
“
Whynot
?”
“
Ijustbr
okeupwi
thmygi
rl
fr
iendt
wo
weeksback”
“
Sti
l
lnewhey
..
didy
oul
oveher
?”
“
Yes”
“
Whydi
dyoubr
eakupwi
thher
”
“
Ifel
tli
keIwasnoti
mpor
tantt
oher
,I
hadt
obegherf
orherat
tent
ionandIgot
t
ir
ed”
“
Iunder
stand”
“
Wenadoy
ouhav
eaboy
fri
end?
”
“
Youseem t
oknowal
otaboutmehow
comey
oudon’
tknowaboutt
hat
?”He
chuckl
es
“
Justsayy
esornoDol
l
face”
“
No”
“
Whynot
”
“
Noonehasev
ershowedanyi
nter
estt
o
me”
“
Arey
ousur
eaboutt
hat
?”
“
Yes”
“
Okayl
etssaysomeoneshowy
ousome
i
nter
estnowwoul
dyoudat
ehi
m”
“
Thatwi
l
ldepend”
“
Onwhat
?”
“
Whatki
ndofaper
sonhei
s,doeshe
r
eal
l
ywantt
obewi
thmeorhej
ustf
eel
s
sor
ryf
ormebecauseI
’
m bl
i
nd,
orhe’
s
j
ustusi
ngmef
orwhat
everr
easoni
t
maybe”
“
Isee…wehav
esomewher
etogo,
Iwi
l
l
gor
uny
ouabat
h”
“
Okay
”Hesl
i
deoutofbed,
Itakemy
phoneont
hebedsi
det
abl
eand
swi
tchedi
ton.Tonsofmessages
comest
hroughj
ustt
heni
t’
sri
ng.
“
Hel
l
o”
“
Bit
chwher
ethef
uckar
eyou!
!”
“
GoshGugudoy
ouhav
etoscr
eam”
“
Real
l
yMi
ra,
yourmom i
sfr
eaki
ngout
.
Shecal
l
edmel
astni
ghtt
haty
ou
di
sappear
ed”
“
I’
m okayGugu,
youhav
enot
hingt
o
wor
ryabout
”
“
Wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
I’
m atLwenkosi
’
spl
ace?
”
“
Who’
sthatnow?
”
“
Ther
udeboy
”
“
Youl
yi
ng!Whatar
eyoudoi
ngt
her
e
Mi
ra”
“
Ihadnowher
etogo,
Ijustneededt
obe
awayf
rom homeGugu”
“
Youspentani
ghtwi
thhi
m?”
“
Yeahwesl
eptt
oget
her
”
“
Iheeeey
ougoMi
ra!Iwantal
lthe
det
ail
sit
’sseemsl
i
key
ouhav
ejui
cy
news”
“
Uthandai
zi
ndabaGugu,
wedi
dn’
thav
e
sexi
fthat
'swhaty
out
hinki
ng.Wear
e
par
tner
swor
kingonsomepr
oject
t
oget
hernot
hingmor
e”
“
Proj
ectwhatpr
oject
?”
“
Ihav
etogoby
e”
“
Mi…”Ihangupbef
oreshecoul
dfi
nish.
Shewon’
tst
opaski
ngandI
’
m notr
eady
t
otel
lheraboutmyabusi
vest
epdad.
“
Yourbat
hisr
eady
”Idi
dn’
treal
i
ze
Lwenkosi
isher
e.Isl
i
deoutofbedand
t
akemuf
fi
nthenheshowsmet
he
bat
hroom.
“
Her
e’st
henewt
oot
hbr
ushIhav
e
al
readyputt
het
oot
hpast
e”
“
Youshoul
dhav
ejustshowedme
ev
ery
thi
ngIwoul
dhav
edone
ev
ery
thi
ng”
“
IknowDol
l
face,
Ijustl
ovet
aki
ngcar
e
ofy
ou”
“
Oht
hat
’ssosweet
”Hechuckl
esand
makehi
swayout
.Thehy
gienepr
ocess
t
akesl
ongert
henusual
asI
’
m notuset
o
t
hisbat
hroom andr
eachi
ngt
osome
ot
herst
uffi
sami
ssi
on.Byt
het
imeI
f
ini
shI
’
m sof
rust
rat
ed,
Ifeel
li
kecr
ying.
Todayi
soneoft
hoseday
swher
eIhat
e
mov
ingar
ound.Ishoul
dhav
est
ayed
home.Imakemywayt
othebedr
oom
“
Heywhat
’swr
ong”
“
Not
hing”
“
Heyhey
,what
’swr
ong”He’
sri
ghtnex
t
t
omer
ubbi
nghi
shandsonmyar
ms.I
t
ryt
oopenmymout
htospeakbut
wor
dsf
ail
me.Ibur
sti
ntot
ear
s
“
OhDol
l
face,
don’
tdot
hist
omepl
ease”
Hepul
l
smet
ohi
schestandembr
ace
me
“
It
’sokay
..
.I
’
m sor
rywhat
evert
hatupset
y
ou”He’
sst
roki
nghi
shandonmybar
e
back,
ther
e’ssomet
hingmy
ster
ious
abouthi
shugsgosh.Icanf
eel
mysel
f
cal
mingdown.Ipul
lbackandhewi
pes
myt
ear
swi
thhi
shands.
“
Tal
ktomepl
ease”
“
Idon’
twantt
otal
kabouti
t”
“
Ift
hisi
saboutMrKhumal
oabusi
ng
y
ourmom,
Ipr
omi
sey
ou,
Iwi
l
ldeal
wit
h
t
hismat
ternomat
terhowdanger
ousi
t
i
sokay
”Inod
“
Iwashedy
ourcl
othesanddr
iedt
hem,
y
oucangetdr
essedt
heyar
eont
he
bed”Ncoohei
ssosweetbaki
thi
“
Thanky
ou”Isi
tont
hebedandf
iddl
e
f
ormycl
othes,
goshheev
enwashedmy
pant
ies
“
KodaLwenkosi
youshoul
dn’
thav
e
washedt
hepant
ies”
“
Whynot
?”Gosht
hisguy
“
Undi
esar
epr
ivat
e,y
oumor
on”He
l
aughs
“
Notmygi
rl
fr
iend’
sundi
es”
“
Gir
lf
ri
endhuh?
”
“
Yes”
“
Hai
bobut
iungi
shel
eni
ni?Ngakuqoma
ni
ni?
”Isaygi
ggl
i
ng
“
Youcal
l
edmeYOURdough”Ibur
sti
nto
l
aught
er
“
Hai
sukagetoutofher
eIwannaget
dr
essed”
“
Iwi
l
lgot
akeabat
h”Ihearhi
s
f
oot
stepsshuf
fl
ingawayt
henIst
art
get
ti
ngdr
essed.OnceI
’
m done,
Isi
ton
t
hebedandwai
tforhi
m.Hedoesn’
t
t
akel
ongf
ewmi
nut
esl
aterhe i
sdone.
“
Thatwast
hequi
ckestbat
hev
er”
“
HeyI
'
m aman,
Idon’
tbat
hli
kea
woman,
taki
nghour
sinabat
hroom.Tel
l
mewhaty
’al
ldoi
ngi
nabat
hroom f
oran
hourni
sukeni
kar
abhaamaz
eze
y
ini
?”(
Y’al
lscr
ubbi
ngf
lees?
)Ibur
sti
nto
l
aught
er
“
Youar
ecr
azy
”
“
Nobutser
ousDol
l
facemay
bey
ouwi
l
l
t
ell
me,
I’
m cur
ious”Igi
ggl
eandt
akemy
phone.
“
I’
m done,
let
’sgohav
ebr
eakf
ast
,they
ar
ewai
ti
ngf
orus”Het
akesmyhand
andwej
oinev
ery
onef
orbr
eakf
ast
“
Mor
ningev
ery
one”Webot
hsayatonce
“
Mor
ning”andt
heyal
lchor
used
“
Mir
acomesi
tnex
ttome!
”Say
s
Snot
hando
“
Nonosot
haty
ouwi
l
lpest
erherwi
th
quest
ions”
“
Hawubut
i,Mi
radoesn’
tmi
ndangi
thi
”
“
Yes”Ir
epl
y
“
Wel
lIdomi
nd”
“
Hawubut
i”shesoundshur
tsoIf
orget
aboutLwenkosi
’
spr
otestandsi
tnex
tto
Snot
hando.
“
Doy
ouhav
eal
l
ergi
esMi
ra”askshi
s
mom
“
NoMamaIdon’
t”
“
Wel
lwehav
etoast
,eggs,
bacon,
sausages,
sof
tpor
ri
dge,
cor
nfl
akesand
scones”
“
Iwi
l
lhav
esof
tpor
ri
dgeMa”
“
Her
eyougo…y
ouwanti
twi
thmi
l
kor
?”
“
Yesmi
l
kandsugar
”
“
Giv
eitt
ohermom sheknowshowt
o
doi
ther
sel
f”
“
Hayngekemakot
imt
hel
elewena
masequny
elawonkeushukel
alanebi
si
akaboni
phel
alomunt
u”(
Haymy
daught
eri
nlawdoi
tyour
sel
fwhati
fshe
poural
lthesugarandmi
l
kshecan’
tsee)
t
hisol
dhagi
sget
ti
ngundermyski
n
now.
“
Mom woul
dyoust
opt
hispl
ease”The
f
athersayst
ernl
y
“
KodwaBheki
mtanami
iqi
nisol
ent
o
engi
yi
shoy
o.Angazukut
hini
buv
umel
a
kanj
ani
ubudl
elwanephakat
hikwal
e
nt
ombaz
aneengaboni
nomz
ukul
uwami
,
uf
anel
weokungconokunal
okhu”(
But
Bheki
mychi
l
dI’
mtel
l
ingt
het
rut
h.I
don’
tknowhowdoy
oual
l
owt
his
r
elat
ionshi
pbet
weent
hisbl
i
ndgi
rland
mygr
andchi
l
dhedeser
vesbet
tert
hen
t
his)Herwor
dsr
ippedmyhear
tint
o
mi
l
li
onspi
eces.Il
ostmyappet
it
einan
i
nst
ant
.
“
Mamawhati
syourpr
obl
em huh!
”
“
Thi
sgi
rlwi
l
lbr
ingbadl
ucksi
nour
f
ami
l
y!”Wowi
t’
senoughnow,
Idon’
t
wantt
ohearanymor
einsul
tsf
rom t
his
ol
dwoman
“
I’
m sor
ryi
fIcauseanypr
obl
em f
or
bei
ngher
e,i
twasnev
ermyi
ntent
ion.
Thanky
ouf
ort
hebr
eakf
astMr
sNkosi
.
Lwenkosi
cany
oupl
easet
akeme
home”Igetupf
rom t
hechai
randt
ake
muf
fi
n
“
Butwhatabouty
ourbr
eakf
ast
sweet
hear
t”say
shi
smot
her
“
I’
mfi
ner
eal
l
y”
“
Dol
l
facesi
tdownandeat
”
“
Takemehomepl
ease”Iwhi
sper
s,I
’
m
cl
oset
otear
sbutIwon’
tlett
hem f
all
her
e.
“Babaawukhuz
eumamakhopl
ease!
”
(
Dadt
alkt
oyourmom)“
Let
sgo
Dol
l
face”Het
akesmyhand
“
ByeMi
ra”
say
sSnot
hando
“
Byebabygi
rl
”
“
Woul
dyoucomebacksomeot
hert
ime
pl
ease”Inodj
ustt
omakeherhappy
.I’
m
notcomi
ngbackher
e.Idon’
twantt
o
br
ingbadl
uckwi
thmybl
i
ndness.Ibi
d
f
arewel
l
,hi
smom hugsmeandki
sses
mycheekt
henwemakeourwayout
.
Thedr
ivei
ssi
l
entunt
ilhebr
eaksi
t
“
I’
m sor
ryf
orhowmygr
andmat
reat
ed
y
ou,
she’
sbi
tt
erandt
reatmymot
herl
i
ke
t
rash”
“
It
’sokayr
eal
l
y”
“
Idon’
tfeel
okayt
haty
oudi
dn’
teaty
our
br
eakf
astwhi
chr
est
aur
antdoy
ouwant
t
oeat
”
“
McDonal
d’s”
“
McDonal
d’si
tis”Thegoodt
hingi
sThat
McDonal
d’shav
eBr
ail
l
emenus.Wear
e
atMcDonal
d’snowwai
ti
ngf
orourf
ood.
“
I’
m sor
ryMi
ra”
“
Isai
dit
'sokayLwenkosi
”
“
ButIf
eel
li
key
ouar
est
il
lmadatme”
“
NoI
m not
,it
’snoty
ouwhosai
dhur
tful
wor
dst
ome”Het
akesmyhandsi
nto
hi
sandki
ssest
hem.
“
Tel
lmewhatmadey
ouupsetwheny
ou
wer
etaki
ngabat
h”It
akehugesi
ghand
t
ell
him
“
Ifeel
sousel
essandhopel
ess”
“
HeyIt
oldy
out
otel
lmei
fyouneed
hel
p”
“
Idi
dn’
twantt
obot
hery
ou”
“
Bot
herme?
”Hechuckl
esbi
tt
erl
yand
cont
inues“
Don’
tyoudar
emake
assumpt
ionsaboutme!
!”
“
Arey
ounott
heonewhosai
dyoudon’
t
hav
eti
met
obaby
sitabl
i
ndi
nsol
ent
bi
tch”Hegr
oanst
hent
her
e’ssi
l
encef
or
amoment
“
LookIwasoutofl
i
neandI
’
m sor
ry
aboutt
hat
,pl
easef
orgi
veme”
“
Whataboutt
hedayy
oubumpedi
nto
me,
youcal
l
edmeabi
tchandy
ousai
dI
mustst
ayhomei
fI’
m bl
i
nd.Sopl
aces
l
i
ker
est
aur
ant
sar
enotmeantf
orbl
i
nd
peopl
eLwandl
elwenkosi
?”
“
Nonoofcour
senot
,I’
m sor
ryokayand
Ihav
enoex
cusef
orwhatIsai
d.Iwas
r
udepl
easef
orgi
vememyDol
l
face.
”
“
Fir
sti
mpr
essi
onl
ast
sfor
everMr
”
“
Eishokayl
et’
sst
artov
er”Heget
sup
butI
’
m notsur
ewhati
shedoi
ng
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ng?
”Icanf
eel
him
makehi
swayonmysi
de
“
I’
m kneel
i
ngdownbef
orey
ou”ohno
noti
nfr
ontofpeopl
e
“
Heygetup,
I’
m sur
epeopl
ear
elooki
ng
atusnow”
“
Idon’
tcar
e”Het
akesmyhandsi
ntohi
s
“
Nkosaz
aneenhl
eungi
chaz
il
eyaz
ngi
themangi
kubukaI
nhl
i
ziy
oyami
y
othokoz
aekuj
uleni
kway
o.I
gama
uLwandl
elwenkosi
isbongouNkosi
ngabei
sphal
aphal
aesi
phambi
kwami
ubani
sona”(
Beaut
if
ulpr
incessIl
i
key
ou,
whenIl
aidmyey
esony
ouIf
eltj
oyf
rom
t
hedept
hofmyhear
t.Mynamei
s
Lwandl
elwenkosi
andmysur
namei
s
Nkosi
,whoi
sthebeaut
if
ull
adybef
ore
me)
ev
ery
onewent“
awwww”ohmanIswear
,
Imel
ted.
”
Mir
a”Iwhi
sper
“
Angi
kuz
wandoni
yamanz
i”(
Ican’
thear
y
oudar
kbeaut
y)
“
Mir
aMt
himkhul
u”
“
OhMashwabadawenaowashwabadel
a
i
nkomonempondo,
yat
himay
ifi
ka
emphi
njweni
yadl
amal
ala.Umkhul
u
Bhungane!
”(Pr
aises)Whati
sthi
sguy
doi
ngt
ome.
“
CanIj
oiny
oupl
ease”Inodnott
rust
ing
myv
oice.I
'
mfeel
i
ngsogi
ddy
.Hesi
ton
hi
schai
r
“
Ohsoy
oucanbeaZul
uguy
”Hel
aughs
“
Whatdoy
oumeanIcanbeaZul
uguy
,
I
’
m aZul
uguy
”
“
Osphal
aphal
a,noNkosaz
ane”Igi
ggl
e
bl
ushi
ng.Ourf
oodar
ri
vesweeatov
era
chat
.It
’sof
fi
cial
,Ienj
oyspendi
ngt
ime
wi
tht
hisguyev
ent
houghhemakesmy
hear
tpoundsr
api
dlyandmakemef
eel
gi
ddy
.Hemakesmef
orgetaboutmy
notsoper
fectl
i
fe.Whenhecal
l
sme
Dol
l
faceImel
tli
kechocol
ate.Whenwe
f
ini
sheat
ingwel
eav
e,I
’
m notsur
e
wher
ear
ewegoi
ngbuthesai
dIhav
eto
meetsomeonesoher
ewear
e.
“
ShoMal
umes”
“
Ntwana”Say
samanwi
thahoar
se
v
oice
“
Thi
sisMi
ra,
Dol
l
facet
hisi
smyuncl
e,
mymot
her
’sbr
other
”
“
HiMal
ume”
“
HeyMi
ra”
“
Thi
smani
stheonet
hati
sgoi
ngt
o
hel
pusbr
ingdownKhumal
o”
“
Ahh.
..
ntwanascanwet
alki
npr
ivat
e”
“
Sur
e,Dol
l
faceI
’
m comi
ngy
ezwa”He
ki
ssesmycheekandt
heywal
kawayso
Ist
andt
her
e.Icanheart
hem t
alki
ngbut
Icantgr
aspt
heact
ual
wor
ds.Mi
nut
es
l
atet
heycomebackandLwenkosi
say
s
wewi
l
lcomebackt
omor
rowt
owor
kon
t
hepl
anandt
heuncl
eagr
ees.
“
Whatwer
eyout
wot
alki
ngabout
”
“
Fami
l
ymat
ter
s”
“
Okay
..
.sohowi
shegoi
ngt
ohel
pus?
”
“
He’
scomput
ergeek,
hecanhackany
i
nfor
mat
ionandhe’
sal
soconnect
ed”
“
Ohsohe’
stheoney
ougotal
lthe
i
nfor
mat
ionaboutmei
ncl
udi
ngmy
st
epdad”
“
Yes”
“
ButwhyLwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
BecauseIl
i
key
ou”
“
Idon’
tbel
i
evey
ou”
“
Whatdoy
ouwantmet
odof
ory
out
o
bel
i
eveme”
“
Youusedt
hisi
nfor
mat
iont
ogett
ome”
“
Kindof
”
”
Youdon’
tcar
eaboutbr
ingi
ngdown
Khumal
o”
“
Whatnobaby
!Don’
tsayt
hat
..Iused
t
hisi
nfor
mat
iont
ogett
oyoubecauseI
wantt
ohel
pyouandy
ourmom”
“
Mhm”
“
Youdon’
tbel
i
eveme”
“
Looki
t’
snott
hatIdon’
twantt
obel
i
eve
y
oubutpeopl
edon’
tjusthel
pyou
Lwenkosi
,theywantsomet
hingi
nret
urn
andwhatdoy
ouwantf
rom me?
”
“
Not
hing”
“
Youknowmyst
epdadusedt
obesweet
l
i
key
oubutl
ooknow”
“
Heyheydon’
tyoudar
ecompar
eme
wi
tht
hatani
mal
!”Ij
umpupabi
t.He
si
ghs“
I’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
tmeant
oshoutat
y
ou.Letmepul
lov
erandl
et’
stal
kabout
t
his.Hepul
lov
erandt
akeahugebr
eat
h
“
Ioncehadaf
ri
endwhowasbeat
enup
byherboy
fri
endandt
hedayIr
eal
i
zedI
t
wasal
readyl
ate.Ihat
eitwhenIsee
menabusi
ngwomen.If
ail
edt
orescue
myf
ri
endbutIcanr
escuey
ouandy
our
mom Mi
ra”
“
I’
m sor
ryabouty
ourf
ri
end”
“
It
’sokay
”Her
unshi
sfi
nger
ti
psonmy
cheekandt
her
e’ssi
l
ence,
theonl
y
soundIcanheari
smyt
huddi
nghear
t
“
Youar
esobeaut
if
ulMi
ra”
“
Thanky
ou”Iwhi
sper
“
Pleaseal
l
owmet
oki
ssy
ou”If
eel
his
br
eat
honmyf
ace,
wear
ebr
eat
hingt
he
sameai
randournosesar
etouchi
ng.I
swal
l
owspi
tmyhear
tisscr
eami
nggu-
gu-
gu.If
eel
hisl
i
psbr
ushi
ngagai
nst
mi
nemyey
esaut
omat
ical
l
ycl
ose.We
hearal
oudbangont
hewi
ndow.
“
Eyeyopent
hedoor
!!
”Icannev
er
mi
staket
hatv
oice.
“
Youwi
l
lbr
eakmywi
ndowman!
”Say
s
Lwandl
elwenkosi
“
Vul
a!”(
Openup)wegetoutoft
hecar
,
“
Whathel
li
syourpr
obl
em man”
“
I’
m her
etof
etchMi
ra,
Ihav
ebeen
l
ooki
ngf
orher
!”
“
I’
mfi
neMal
umeSox
,Lwenkosi
was
dr
ivi
ngmehome”
“
Youhear
dhersobuz
zof
f”
“
Eynt
wanaungal
i
ngeungi
fakeumunwe
ez
inqeni
ngobangi
zomi
ncabese
uy
anqamuka.
..
woz
awena”Hegr
absmy
handandwegeti
nhi
scar
.Hebuckl
es
meupt
hengoest
ohi
ssi
de.Thedr
ivei
s
awkwar
dlysi
l
ence
“
Wher
edi
dyousl
eepMi
ra,
Iwasl
ooki
ng
f
ory
out
hewhol
eni
ght
!Doy
ouknow
howwor
ri
edIwasandy
ourf
ather
al
mostki
l
ledmebecauseIcoul
dn’
tfi
nd
y
ou!
”
“
Ical
l
edy
ounj
ebuty
ounev
err
etur
ned
mycal
l
”
“
Youdi
d?”
“
Yesi
twasanswer
edbysomewoman
hesai
dyouar
ebusyandy
oual
way
stel
l
mey
ouwi
l
lnev
erbebusyf
orme”
“
Shi
t!
”Hegr
oans“
I’
m sor
ryshedi
dn’
t
t
ell
me”Isai
dnot
hing,
whenwear
ri
veat
homeIt
akemymuf
fi
nandwebot
h
makeourwayi
n.Mom at
tacksmewi
th
ahug
“
OhbabyIwassowor
ri
edabouty
ou”
“
I’
m okaymom”
“
Thanky
ouSox
”say
smyst
epdad
“
Nopr
obl
em MrKhumal
oSi
r….mt
wana
I
’
m sor
ryOkay
”Hehugsmeandbi
d
f
arewel
lthenhel
eav
es
“
Wher
edi
dyousl
eepbaby
”mymom
asks
“
AtLwenkosi
’
spl
ace,
arey
oudone
packi
ng?
”
“
Whoi
sLwenkosi
”sheasksagai
n
“
TheboyIt
oldy
ouabout
”
“
Yousl
eepi
ngwi
thboy
snowMi
ra?
”Aks
myst
epdad
“
Mom ar
eyoudonepacki
ng,
shoul
dwe
go?
”
“
Mir
aI’
mtal
ki
ngt
oyou!
!”Ij
umpwi
th
f
ri
ght
“
Mom”Isaywi
thashaki
ngv
oice
“
I’
m sor
ryOkay
,I’
m sor
rymypr
incess,
i
t’
sjustt
hatIwaswor
ri
edabouty
ou”He
hugsme
“
Iwi
l
lgot
akeawal
ktocal
m down”
“
Okay
”Mom say
sthenIhear
ddad
f
oot
stepsshuf
fl
ingaway
“
Soar
ewel
eav
ing”
“
Andgowher
eMi
raaymusaukuba
i
sli
ma!
”
“
Goshwhat
’swr
ongwi
thy
ouhuh?You
wanthi
mtoki
l
lyou”
“
Hewi
l
lgethel
pbaby
…thi
sist
hef
ir
st
t
imehet
alkedaboutget
ti
nghel
p.He’
s
wi
l
li
ngt
ochangel
et’
sgi
vehi
m one
chance”Ichuckl
e
“
Idon’
tknowi
fyouar
eaf
ool
,ora
mor
onorani
diot
”
“
Yey
!Youar
eoutofl
i
nenowi
m st
il
l
y
ourmot
her
!!
.I’
m doi
ngal
loft
hisf
or
y
ou!
!Howwi
l
lyousur
viv
eont
hest
reet
huh!
!”
“
Hav
eyouev
ert
houghthowIwi
l
l
sur
viv
ewheny
ouar
edead!
”Imakemy
wayt
othebedr
oom andcr
awl
onmy
bedt
hencr
ymyl
ungsout
.Ican’
tli
ve
wi
tht
hef
actt
hatmom hast
oendur
eal
l
t
hispai
nforme.If
eel
li
keabur
den
may
beIshoul
djustdi
emay
bet
hat
’s
whenshewi
l
lhav
est
rengt
htol
eav
ethi
s
man.
.
Thef
ami
l
yisgr
owi
ngl
ethav
e250
comment
sand950l
i
kes
CHAPTER7
I
t’
seasyt
otoj
udgeone’
schoi
ces
wi
thoutt
hecar
etot
ryandand
under
standt
hei
rreasons.Li
fei
snotj
ust
bl
ackandwhi
te,
ther
e’ssomuchgr
ey.
I
’
m notgoi
ngt
otr
yanddef
endmy
sel
f
becauseatt
heendoft
heday
,one
under
standswhatheorshewant
sto
under
standbutwhatIknowi
sify
ou
coul
dwal
kami
l
einmyshoesy
ouwi
l
l
under
stand.Ican’
tjustpackandl
eav
e
wher
ewi
l
lwego?Ihav
enot
hingi
nmy
namenorownaqual
i
ficat
ionandbesi
de
Vusi
woul
dnev
erl
etmel
eav
ejustl
i
ke
t
hat
.Bei
ngamot
heraddst
othe
si
tuat
ionespeci
all
ywi
thachi
l
dli
keMi
ra
whohasdi
sabi
l
ity
.Ican’
tbegi
nto
i
magi
nehowmybabygi
rlwoul
dsur
viv
e
outt
her
eint
hest
reet
.Itwashar
d
al
readywhenwecamet
othi
ssi
de.I
t
t
ooksomet
imef
orhert
oadaptt
othe
newenv
ironment
.Howwoul
dshe
sur
viv
eont
hest
reet
?

Li
fei
scr
uel
int
hest
reet
,Idon’
twantmy
daught
ert
ogetr
apedwhi
l
eI’
m busy
hust
li
ngf
orher
.Myhusbandmaybe
manyt
hingsbuthe’
snotar
api
st.Iknow
t
hathewoul
dnev
erhur
tMi
raespeci
all
y
i
nthatmanner
.Thi
sisourhome,
thi
sis
wher
emydaught
erf
eel
sfr
eeand
comf
ort
abl
etomov
ear
ound.Al
lIwant
i
stopr
ovi
deherwi
thev
ery
thi
ngshe
want
stomakeherl
i
feeasyand
enj
oyabl
e,makeherf
eel
comf
ort
abl
e
wi
thher
sel
f,i
sitasi
ntowantwhat
's
bestf
ormydaught
er?Iknowi
t’
snot
easyf
orhert
ounder
standandshe
t
hinksl
eav
ingi
sthebestopt
ionbutI
knowshewon’
tev
ensur
viv
easecond
outt
her
e.Shewasst
ruggl
i
ngt
osur
viv
e
her
ehowmuchmor
eint
hest
reet
.

Iunder
standwher
e’sshe’
scomi
ngf
rom
andt
hef
earofl
osi
ngmebutf
ort
hef
ir
st
t
imehespokeaboutget
ti
nghel
p.Ihav
e
nev
erseenhi
mthi
sbr
oken.Hehat
es
hi
msel
fforcont
ri
but
ingi
nourbaby
’s
deat
h.May
beI
’
m gul
l
ibl
ebutIdobel
i
eve
t
hathewi
l
lchangeheneedshel
p.
Khumal
oisasweetl
ovi
ngmanwhoj
ust
needshel
p.If
oundmor
ethanj
usta
husbandi
nhi
m.If
oundasoul
mat
e,a
f
ri
end,
abr
other
,af
atherofmychi
l
dand
mi
neatt
hesamet
ime,
ali
vi
ngGod.If
ail
t
oseehi
m asamonst
erl
i
keonewoul
d
sayt
oanabusi
veman.Ihav
efai
tht
hat
hewi
l
lchangef
orusandwewi
l
l
becomet
hatl
ovel
yfami
l
yweoncewer
e.
Iwoul
dnev
erf
orgi
vemy
sel
ffornot
t
ryi
ngt
ohel
phi
m atl
eastl
etmet
ryand
seewhathappens.Wheny
out
rul
ycar
e
f
orsomeoney
oudon’
tlookf
orf
aul
ts
buty
oul
ookf
oranswer
s.Youdon’
tlook
f
ormi
stakesbuty
ouf
ightt
hem.Iknow
myhear
tismyt
ruegui
deandIl
i
vemy
l
i
feal
lbymy
sel
f,noonewi
l
lst
epi
nto
myshoesandf
eel
thewayIf
eel
orf
ace
whatI
’
m goi
ngt
hrough.

Mybodyhur
tsbutt
hepai
nIf
eel
inmy
hear
tisbey
ondi
magi
nat
ion.If
eel
li
ke
i
t’
sri
ppedi
ntomi
l
li
onpi
eces.Iwas
r
eal
l
ylooki
ngf
orwar
dtohav
inga
secondbor
n,aboyespeci
all
ysi
nceI
hav
eagi
rl
.I’
m sur
eMi
rawoul
dhav
e
l
ovedt
ohav
eababybr
otherbutIwon’
t
l
i
eandsayIwasn’
tscar
edt
hatImi
ght
got
hrought
hesamepai
nIwentt
hrough
wi
thMi
ra.Theysayev
ery
thi
nghappens
f
ort
her
easonbuti
tdoesn’
thur
tless.
SomehowIt
houghtababymi
ght
changehi
m butl
ooki
ngathowbr
oken
hei
smay
bet
hiswaswhatweneededt
o
sav
eourmar
ri
age.

It
akeahugesi
ghasIwat
chhermake
herwayt
oherbedr
oom cr
ying.I
’
m
happyt
hatshe’
ssaf
eandsound.Iwas
sowor
ri
edabouther
,thi
nki
ngmay
be
t
heunt
hinkabl
ehappenedt
oher
.Ihat
e
t
hatwear
econst
ant
lyf
ight
ingl
atel
y.I
canseet
hatI
’
mlosi
ngher
.Ideci
det
o
makeherf
avor
it
esandwi
chwhi
chi
s
br
eadwi
thbut
terandpeanutbut
ter
.
OnceI
’
m doneIputherpl
atei
nthet
ray
andagl
assofl
i
tchi
jui
cewhi
chi
sal
so
herf
avor
it
e.JustasI
’
m aboutt
ogot
o
herr
oom myphoner
ings.I
t’
s
Nomat
hemba,
myf
ri
endwemett
hrough
ourhusbands.Theyar
ebestf
ri
endsand
weal
sobecamebestf
ri
ends.

“
Noma”
“
Heydar
li
nghowar
eyouhol
dingup”I
’
m
t
akenbyt
hatIhav
en’
ttol
dherany
thi
ng
“
I’
mfi
neandy
ou”
“
ComeonBonga,
youknowy
oucan
nev
erl
i
etome.Losi
ngababymustbe
har
dfory
ou.I
’
mreal
l
ysor
rysi
s,I
’
m
goi
ngt
opassbyl
atert
hisaf
ter
noon
okay
”Isi
ghVusi
musthav
etol
dher
husband.
“
Iwi
l
lbef
ineNomabutt
hanks.Iwi
l
lbe
wai
ti
ngf
ory
ou”
“
Okaysweet
hear
t,Il
ovey
ou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Ihanguphonest
lyI
’
m
notl
ooki
ngf
orwar
dtoherv
isi
t.Al
lI
wantr
ightnowi
stocuddl
ewi
thmy
daught
er,
thatwi
l
lmakemef
eel
bet
ter
.I
t
aket
het
rayandmakemywayt
oher
bedr
oom.Ipushi
topenwi
thmybut
t
si
nceI
’
m car
ryi
ngat
ray
.Iknowshewi
l
l
notbepl
easet
hatIdi
dn’
tknock,
shecan
becheekyatt
imes.I
tiswhatt
eenager
s
dobutNomasay
sI’
m spoi
l
inghert
oo
muchandIneedt
obef
ir
m wi
thher
somet
imes.Wel
li
t’
sheropi
nionbutI
won’
tbeatupmychi
l
d,Ihav
ebeen
t
hrought
hat
.Myf
atheruset
obeatme
upst
rongwi
thasj
ambokandt
hatmade
mest
ubbor
nandr
ebel
l
ious.DoI
somehowmi
sshome?NoIdon’
tbutI
mi
ssmymot
herandmysi
ster
s.I
wonderi
ftheyar
efi
newher
evert
heyar
e.
Thei
rgl
um f
acesar
est
il
lpl
ater
edonmy
mi
nd,
thedaydadchasedmeoutofhi
s
house,
spi
tt
ingv
enoms.

Imakemywayi
n,she’
snotonherbed
soshemustbei
nthebat
hroom,
Ican
hearwat
err
unni
ng.Ipl
acet
het
rayon
t
hepedest
alandmakemywayt
othe
bat
hroom.If
reez
eforamomentandmy
hear
tst
opsbeat
ing.Ther
e’swat
eral
l
ov
ert
hef
loor
“
OhNoMi
ra!
!”Ir
unt
oherandt
akeher
outofabat
htub.
“
Baby
!Nonono!
”Ipl
aceherdownand
t
urnhert
headt
othesi
de,
all
owi
ngany
wat
ert
odr
ainf
rom hermout
handnose.
OhGodwhatIhav
eIdone!Ipul
lher
headbackt
othecent
erandbegi
n
mout
h-t
o-mout
hresusci
tat
ion.
“
Mir
awakeuppl
ease”Icr
yasIt
ryt
o
br
eat
hei
ntot
hemout
hwhi
l
epi
nchi
ng
hernose.
“
Babywakeuppl
easedon’
tdot
hist
o
me”Iscr
eam i
nagony
.
“
Bonga!
”Ihearmyhusbandscr
eami
ng
mynameoht
hankshei
sback.He
makeshi
swayandl
ookatusi
nshock
“
Fuckwhathappened!
”
“
Idon’
tknow,
Ifoundher
…”Icoul
dn’
t
f
ini
sh,
Ibur
sti
ntot
ear
s.Hekneel
sdown
andputhi
searnearhermout
hthen
cont
inuet
odomout
htomout
h
r
esusci
tat
ion.Shecoughsandspi
l
ls
wat
eroutofhermout
h.
“
Baby
”Ihol
dherf
orsuppor
t
“
Youscar
edme”Herey
esgl
i
stenswi
th
t
ear
s
“
Idi
ditf
ory
oumommy
.Idon’
twanty
ou
t
oendur
eal
lthi
sabusebecauseofme
mom.Iwant
edy
out
obef
reef
rom t
his
pai
n”myhear
tsi
nkst
omyst
omachand
myt
ear
sfal
lonherbeaut
if
ulf
ace.I
di
dn’
treal
i
zehowdeept
hishasaf
fect
ed
her
.Il
ookatmyhusband,
gui
l
t,r
emor
se
andpai
nfl
ashesacr
osshi
sey
es.
“
Let
’st
akehert
othehospi
tal
tobesur
e
she’
sokay
”Hi
svoi
cei
sbr
eaki
ng
t
hroughev
erysy
ll
abl
ecomi
ngoutofhi
s
mout
h.Heget
supandscoopsherup
t
henwal
koutwi
thher
.Ipackherpj
s
andev
ery
thi
ngshemi
ghtneedand
f
oll
owbehi
ndhi
m.
I
’
m att
hebackseatwi
thmymi
racl
ein
myar
msandmyhusbandi
sdr
ivi
ngl
i
ke
amani
ac.Theyt
akehert
hemomentwe
ar
ri
ve.Hepul
l
smei
nhi
sar
msandhugs
me.
“
I’
m sor
ry,
I’
m sososor
ry.
”Il
etoutf
resh
newt
ear
shehol
dsmet
ight
ly,
shushi
ng
meunt
ilI
’
m cal
m.Ipul
lbackandhe
l
ooksatme
“
Ilov
eyouBonga,
Ilov
eyousomuch
andy
ouknowMi
rai
smydaught
ert
oo.I
hat
emy
sel
fthatweal
mostl
ostourbot
h
chi
l
drenbecauseofmyani
mal
i
sti
c
behav
ior
.”Hel
aughst
ear
sdr
oppi
ng
downonhi
sgor
geousf
ace
“
I’
mjustl
i
kehi
m,I
’
m amonst
erl
i
ke
hi
m!!
”He’
sshaki
nguncont
rol
l
abl
e
“
Noy
ouar
enotKhumal
o,y
ouar
enot
l
i
kehi
m”
“
Don'
tdot
hatBongapl
ease”
“
Iknowy
ouar
enotMnt
ungwa,
youar
e
t
hesweet
estmanI
'
veev
ermet
.Youj
ust
needt
ofacey
ourpastandheal
”it
’smy
t
urnt
ocomf
ort
shi
m,wesi
tont
he
couchandIcr
adl
ehi
mli
keababyashe
l
etouthear
twr
enchi
ngsobs.
“
Shhhi
t’
sokay
,wegoi
ngt
obef
ine”
Af
terawhi
l
ehepul
l
sbackandl
ooksat
mewi
thbl
oodshedr
edey
es.
“
Ihav
edeci
dedt
hatI
’
m goi
ngt
omov
e
outoft
hehouse”myhear
tski
psabeat
“
What
?Youar
eleav
ingme?
”
“
NoI
’
m not
,Ij
ustwanty
ouandour
daught
ert
obecomf
ort
abl
ewhi
l
eIwor
k
onf
ixi
ngmy
sel
f.
”
“
Buty
oucanst
il
ldot
hatwhi
l
eyouar
e
wi
thusMnt
ungwa”
“
Noi
t’
snotagoodi
deast
handwasami
.
Iwi
l
lcomeseey
ouguy
sev
ery
day
.My
f
ir
stappoi
ntmentwi
tht
hepsy
chol
ogi
st
i
sat9am t
omor
row.Iwoul
dhav
elov
ed
i
fyoucoul
dcomewi
thmebutsi
nce
Mi
rai
sher
e,we’
l
lthensomeot
hert
ime”
Inodt
ear
sfal
l
ingdownmyf
ace,
Idon’
t
t
rusthi
mtodeal
wit
hthi
sal
one.Iwant
t
obet
her
eforhi
m butIt
hinki
t’
sfort
he
bestespeci
all
yaf
terwhatMi
radi
dtoday
.
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”

.
250comment
s&950l
i
kes
CHAPTER8

Icanhearv
oicesf
rom adi
stanceandI
f
eel
soweakandt
ir
ed.Thesoundofa
beepi
ngmachi
neal
ert
smet
hatI
’
min
hospi
tal
.
“
Baby
,youar
eawake”It
ryt
omov
ebut
mymom st
opsme
“
Becar
eful
,youhav
eiv
-li
ne”Shehel
ps
mesi
t
“
Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ngsweet
hear
t”she’
s
br
ushi
ngmyf
ace
“
I’
m okaymom”
“
Youscar
eduspr
incess,
pleasedon’
tdo
t
hatagai
n”dadchi
rpsi
n
“
Don’
tactl
i
key
oucar
e”
“
Mir
a….
”Hecut
sherof
f
“
It
’sokaydar
li
ngIunder
stand,
letme
gi
vey
ouguy
saspace”
“
Okay
”say
smymom t
hendadmakehi
s
wayout
“
OhbabyI
’
m sogl
ady
ouar
eokay
,I
t
houghtIwasgoi
ngt
olosey
ou”
“
Iwant
edy
out
osav
eyouf
rom t
his
mar
ri
agemom”Ihearherr
eleasi
nga
hugesi
ghandf
eel
hersi
tt
ingnex
ttome
bef
orepul
l
ingmet
oherar
ms.
“
Sweet
hear
titdoesn’
twor
kli
ket
hat
,it
woul
dhav
ehur
tmor
ehady
oudi
edon
me.Ican’
tbegi
ntoi
magi
nehowl
i
fe
woul
dbewi
thouty
ou.Pl
easedon’
tdo
t
hatagai
n.Youcan’
tsav
emebyt
aki
ng
y
ourl
i
fet
hatwi
l
lki
l
lmebey
ondr
epai
rs”
shesay
swi
that
ear
ful
voi
ce
“
ButMom y
ouar
etheonewhosai
dyou
ar
eendur
ingal
lthi
spai
nforme,
Idon’
t
wanty
out
osuf
ferbecauseofme.I
don’
twantt
obeabur
den”myt
ear
s
st
ream downmyf
ace.
“
Heyy
ouar
enotabur
denokay
,I
shoul
dn’
thav
esai
dthat
.I’
m sor
ry
pl
easef
orgi
vememymi
racl
e”
“
Buti
tst
ruemom,
I’
myourbur
deni
fI
wasn’
ther
eyouwoul
dn’
thav
etoendur
e
al
lthi
spai
n.Comet
othi
nkofi
tIhav
e
nev
erbr
oughtj
oyi
nyourl
i
fe.I
’
m acur
se
i
nyourl
i
fe.Yourpar
ent
ski
ckedy
ouout
becausey
ouwer
epr
egnantwi
thmeas
i
fthatwasnotenoughy
ouhad
compl
i
cat
ionsandIwasbor
nbl
i
nd.
Nowy
ouhav
etoendur
eal
loft
hisf
or
mywel
l
bei
ng,
it’
stoomuchmommy
”I
l
etoutal
oudsob
“
HayMi
ra!Pl
easedon’
tsayt
hatmy
chi
l
d.Youar
enotacur
seev
ery
thi
ng
t
hathappenedi
snoty
ourf
aul
t,doy
ou
hearme?I
t’
snoty
ourf
aul
tsweet
hear
t.I
hadt
ogot
hroughev
ery
thi
ngt
hatIwent
t
hroughbecausei
twasmeantt
obe,
not
becauseofy
ou.Ev
ery
thi
nghappensf
or
t
her
easonbaby
.Youar
ethebestt
hing
t
hathasev
erhappenedi
nmyl
i
fe,
myj
oy,
mymi
racl
e,mywor
ld.I
’
m sor
ryt
hatI
madey
ouf
eel
li
keabur
den.I
’
myour
mot
herandIhav
etodowhat
everi
t’
s
t
akesf
ory
out
obewel
ltakencar
eof
.
That
’swhatmot
her
sdo,
it’
sthei
rjobt
o
l
ookaf
tert
hei
rchi
l
dren.Al
l
owmet
obe
y
ourmot
heranddomyj
ob.St
op
quest
ioni
ngmyact
ionsanddeci
sions
becauseIknowwhat
’sbestf
ory
ou.I
under
standt
hati
tmustbehar
dfory
ou
butMi
ral
i
fei
snotaseasyasy
ouseei
t
baby
.Wecan’
tjustpackupandl
eav
e.
Wher
ewi
l
lwego?Yourgr
anti
snot
enough.Youknowhowhar
diti
sfory
ou
t
oadapti
nanewenv
ironmenthowwi
l
l
y
ouadaptont
hest
reet
?May
bey
ou
t
hinkt
hest
reeti
sbet
terbutt
rustmei
t
badoutt
her
eespeci
all
yfory
ou.Idon’
t
wanty
out
ogetr
apedwhi
l
eI’
m outt
her
e
hust
li
ngf
ory
ou,
Idon’
twanty
out
oev
en
ex
per
iencel
i
fei
nthest
reet
.Iwanty
ou
t
ogot
ocol
l
egest
udywhat
every
ou
want
,al
thoughIt
hinky
ourv
oicewi
l
l
t
akey
out
opl
aces.Iwanty
out
ospr
ead
y
ourwi
ngsmychi
l
dandbecomet
he
besty
oucanbe.
”Herwor
dst
ouchme
deepi
nmyhear
t.Ir
eal
i
zenowhow
wr
ongIwasf
ort
aki
ngmyl
i
fe.That
woul
dhav
ebr
okenhermor
ebutI
t
houghtIwasget
ti
ngr
idoft
hebur
den
f
rom her
.Iunder
stand,
Ireal
l
y
under
standbutt
hatdoesn’
tmakei
thur
t
l
ess.
“
Iheary
oumom butI
’
m af
rai
dhewi
l
lki
l
l
y
ou”
“
He’
sseeki
nghel
pmybaby
,hewant
sto
changel
et’
sgi
vehi
m achance”
“
Whatki
ndofhel
p?”
“
He’
sgoi
ngt
ohav
esessi
onswi
tha
psy
chol
ogi
st.Yourf
atherhasanugl
y
pastbaby
.Hi
sdemonsar
ehaunt
ing
hi
m”
“
Ormay
behe’
slat
ewi
fei
shaunt
inghi
m,
phel
ataki
ngone’
sli
fei
snochi
l
d’spl
ay”
Shechuckl
es
“
Yesmay
besowoul
dyougi
vehi
ma
chance”Isi
gh
“
Idon’
tknowmom”
“
Babycomeony
ouknowhowsweet
y
ourf
atheri
sandhesai
dhe’
smov
ing
outoft
hehousej
ustf
ory
out
ofeel
comf
ort
abl
e”
“
Wel
ltheni
fthatt
her
ecaseIheary
ou”
“
Thanky
ou.
..
whathappenedi
nhi
spast
”
“
Let
’st
alkaboutt
her
udeboy
”Imanage
t
osmi
l
ethr
oughmyt
ear
s
“
Whatabouthi
m?”
“
Whati
shi
sname?
”
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
Nkosi
”
“
MhhOkayt
ell
memor
eaboutl
astni
ght
becausewhenIr
ememberi
tcor
rect
ly
y
ouwant
edt
o“j
udakar
ate”hi
m”we
gi
ggl
e
“
Wel
l
…”It
ell
herev
ery
thi
ngandshe
bur
sti
ntol
aught
erwhenIr
eacht
he
snakepar
t.
“
Mom don’
tlaugh!
”
“
I’
m sor
rybabybutasnakepho”she
say
slaughi
ng
“
Asnakei
sal
sol
ong,
har
dandbi
g
mom”
“
Ayasnakei
sver
ylongbabyandI
’
m
sur
eit
’snothar
dasaner
ectpeni
s”
“
Inev
eri
magi
nedi
ttobet
hatsi
zemom,
y
oohIwassoscar
ed”shel
aughs
“
Wel
li
tgetbi
ggert
hant
hat
,itwi
l
lget
bi
ggert
hemor
ehegr
ows.Heseems
l
i
keagoodguyt
hough”
“
Hei
sbuthecanber
udeatt
imes”I
car
ryonandt
ell
heraboutt
hemean
gr
anny
.
“
Mxm uy
any
akel
ogogobadl
ucki
sher
ol
dsel
font
angabaf
il
euhl
elel
eni
rhaaa!
!”
Il
aught
hewayshesai
dthatwasf
unny
,
f
oramomentt
her
eIt
houghtIwas
l
i
steni
ngt
oGC.
“
What
’sf
unnyuy
adel
elal
ogogoshe
needssomesnakeshewi
l
lbeal
ri
ght
.”
“
Hay
imaht
hat
’scr
uel
”shel
aughs
“
NobabyImeanty
ourki
ndofsnake,
the
oney
out
ouchedont
her
udeboy
”I
l
augh
“
Pleasest
opj
oki
ngaboutt
his,
Iwas
r
eal
l
ytr
aumat
ized”shegi
ggl
esandIt
ell
t
her
estoft
hest
orybutIl
eav
ethepar
t
t
hatwewantt
obr
ingdownKhumal
o.
“
Ncooohegent
lemanmos,
foray
oung
guyl
i
kehi
m phel
athesef
uckboy
sbe
l
i
keey
oboo,
li
lmamahal
asugababe”I
gi
ggl
e
“
Soy
oust
il
lgoi
ngt
ospendt
ime
t
oget
her
”Ofcour
secooki
ngapl
ant
o
br
ingdowny
ourhusband.
“
Wel
lyes”
“
Iwantt
omeethi
mfi
rstIwantt
oknow
whathi
sint
ent
ionsar
e”
“
HaaaMama”
“
What
,Iwantt
oknowwhyhe’
s
i
nter
est
edi
nyou.
”
“
Butma….
”
“
Nobut
sMi
raorel
seIwon’
tal
l
owy
ou
t
wot
ospendt
imet
oget
her
”Isi
gh
“
Okayf
ine,
beni
cepl
ease”
“
Whyshoul
dIbeni
ce,
hewasr
udet
o
y
ou?
”
“
Heapol
ogi
zedMama”
“
Iwi
l
lapol
ogi
zet
oo”
“
Maaa!
”Shel
aughs
“
Yousee,
that
’st
her
easonIwantt
o
meett
hisboy
,youseem t
oli
kehi
m.I
hav
etomakesur
ehedoesn’
thur
tyou”
“
Igety
ouandt
hanky
ouf
orl
ooki
ngout
f
ormebutdon’
tscar
ehi
m of
f.Iknow
y
oucanbemeanwheny
ouwantt
o.”
Shechuckl
esandki
ssesmyf
orehead
“
Ilov
eyoubaby
,Il
ovey
ousomuchand
Ipr
omi
sey
oui
t’
sgoi
ngt
obeokay
.Thi
s
ni
ght
mar
ewi
l
lbeov
ersoon”Inod.

Thef
ir
stt
hingInot
icet
henex
tmor
ning
i
sthatmom i
snotnex
ttome.Idi
dn’
t
wanthert
ogohomey
est
erdaysodad
hadt
oaskt
hem t
oal
l
owmom t
ost
ay
ov
er.
“
Mom!
”
“
Int
hebat
hroom!
”Sheshout
sback,
secondsl
aterIhearherwal
ki
ngi
n.
“
Ihav
epr
epar
edabat
hfory
oucomel
et
gety
oucl
eanedupaf
tert
haty
ouwi
l
l
hav
eyourbr
eakf
ast
.”
“
Wher
e’smuf
fi
n?”
“
Idi
dn’
tbr
ingmuf
fi
nbutIgoty
ou”she
hel
psmeoutoft
hebedandgui
demet
o
t
hebat
hroom.It
akeof
fmycl
othesand
shebat
hsmemaki
ngsur
ethatshe’
s
car
eful
sinceIhav
eani
v-l
i
ne.Oncewe
ar
edonewi
thhy
gienepr
ocessIget
dr
essedi
npj
sandsl
i
pper
sbef
ore
maki
ngourwaybackt
othebed.She
t
ucksmei
ncar
eful
l
ymaki
ngsur
eI’
m
seat
edcomf
ort
abl
e
“
Nowl
et’
seat
”
“
What
’st
hat
?”
“
Sof
tpor
ri
dge”
“
Iwantsomet
hingsal
tyandgr
easy
”
“
Thi
sisnoty
ourhospi
tal
Mir
a,open
y
ourmout
h”Ihuf
fandal
l
owhert
ofeed
mewhi
l
ewechatandl
aughher
eand
t
her
e.Mymom andIar
ever
ycl
ose,
we
t
alkaboutev
ery
thi
ngandany
thi
ng.
Gugusay
sI’
mluckyt
ohav
eamot
her
l
i
keher
.Unl
i
keher
,shecan’
tshar
e
ev
ery
thi
ngwi
thhermot
her
.Iheart
he
dooropeni
ngandshut
ti
ngagai
n
“
Greet
ings”say
samanwi
thadeep
v
oice
“
Mor
ningdoct
or”Ohsoi
t’
smydoct
or
“
How’
smypat
ientdoi
ng?
”
“
I’
mfi
nedoct
or,
Ijustwantt
oknow
whenwi
l
lIbegoi
nghome?
”
“
That
’sgood,
Iwi
l
lkeepy
ouf
ort
oday
t
hent
omor
rowIwi
l
llety
ougo”
“
Ist
her
esomet
hingwr
ongdoct
or?
”asks
mymoneywi
thsomuchconcer
ninher
v
oice
“
Noofcour
senotMr
sKhumal
o,Ij
ust
wantt
omakesur
eshe’
sper
fect
lyf
ine.
Shegotl
ucky
,dr
owni
ngcancauseso
muchdamageev
enhear
tfai
l
ure.I
adv
isey
out
omoni
torherwhenshei
s
t
aki
ngabat
handequi
pherbat
hroom t
o
av
oidherdr
owni
ngi
nfut
ure”Huh?I
knowhowt
obat
honmyown,
I’
m nota
ki
d.YesI
t’
sfr
ust
rat
ingwhenI
’
m usi
nga
bat
hroom t
hatI
’
m notf
ami
l
iarwi
thbut
t
hatdoesn’
tmeanIcan’
tbat
hmy
sel
f.
“
Ilknowhow…”mymom cut
smeof
f
“
Iwoul
ddot
hat
,thanky
oudoct
or”
“
Dohav
eanypai
nsMi
ssMt
himkhul
u?”
“
NoI
’
mfi
ne”
“
GoodIwi
l
lcomecheckupony
oul
ater
”
“
Thanky
oudoct
or”mom say
sthenI
heart
hedoct
orwal
ki
ngaway
.
“
Openy
ourmout
h”
“
I’
mful
lnow”Ipur
semyl
i
psandf
oldmy
ar
msagai
nstmechest
“
What
’swi
tht
heat
ti
tudenow”sheasks
cheeki
l
y
“
JustbecauseI
’
m bl
i
nddoesn’
tmeanI
don’
tknowhowt
obat
hmom”Isaywi
th
annoy
ancei
nmyv
oice
“
Ofcour
sebabyIknowt
hat
”
“
Thenwhydi
dn’
tyout
ell
himt
hat
,he
t
alksl
i
keIdr
ownedacci
dent
all
y”Isay
“
Yesbecauset
hat
’swhatIt
oldhi
m.I
di
dn’
twantt
otel
lthem t
haty
ouwer
e
commi
tt
ingsui
cidebecauset
heywer
e
goi
ngt
oref
ery
out
other
apy
”
“
Iseey
ouar
epr
otect
ingy
ourhusband”
“
Youwon’
ttel
lany
bodyaboutt
his,
do
y
ouhearme”Isaynot
hing
“
Mir
a?”Shewar
ns
“
What
?”
“
Youar
erudeatt
imesIwi
l
lpi
nchy
our
bi
gbut
tyouwi
l
lpeeony
our
sel
f,I
’
m not
y
ouragemat
e.IseeI
’
mtoosof
tony
ou
andy
ouar
efor
get
ti
ngy
ourpl
ace”I
swal
l
owhar
d
“
Iwon’
ttel
lany
one”
“
Good…I
’
m goi
ngt
ogohomet
ofet
ch
y
ourmuf
fi
nandbuyy
ousomet
hing
gr
easyandsal
ty.Whatel
sedoy
ou
want
?”
“
Myphoneandheadset
”Isay
“
Cany
oubespeci
fi
consomet
hing
gr
easyandsal
ty?
”
“
Ribs,
fri
esandcheesebur
ger
”
“
Iwi
l
lseey
ounow.Il
ovey
oumy
mi
racl
e”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomommy
”sheki
ssesmy
l
i
psandmakeherwayoutl
eav
ingher
sweetscentbehi
nd.Justt
hent
hedoor
opens
“
Didy
ouf
orgetsomet
hing?
”
“
Dol
lface”myhear
tmel
t
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
”Icanf
eel
him
maki
nghi
swayt
owar
dsme.
“
Hey
,mom t
oldmey
ouwer
eadmi
tt
ed
y
est
erday
.Icoul
dn’
tseey
oubecause
y
ourmom washer
ewi
thy
ou.
..
howar
e
y
ouf
eel
i
ng?
”Hi
smom mustbewor
king
her
e
“
I’
mfi
ne”Thebedsi
nksasi
t
accommodat
eshi
m.Hepul
l
smet
ohi
s
ar
msandhugsme.Weshar
eal
ong
war
m hug,
wrappedar
oundhi
sar
ms
makesmef
eel
li
keev
ery
thi
ngi
sokay
.
“
Iwassoscar
ed…whathappened”He
pul
l
sbackaf
terawhi
l
eandsqueez
es
hi
ssweat
ypal
msonmi
ne.
“
Idr
owned”Isaywi
thal
owv
oice
“
Ohno,
inaswi
mmi
ngpool
?”The
concer
ninhi
svoi
cecan’
tbemi
ssed
“
Noi
nthebat
hroom”Hesay
snot
hing,
I
’
m notsur
eifhehear
dmeorhe’
s
st
udy
ingme.Ibowdownmyheadj
usti
n
case,
mydemeanoursel
l
smeout
.I
don’
twantt
ogeti
ntot
roubl
ewi
thmy
mom.Iknowwhenshemeans
somet
hing,
shewi
l
ldef
ini
tel
ywhi
pmy
ass.
“
Dol
l
face”hel
etsgooft
heot
herhand
andl
i
ftsupmychi
n
“
Whathappened”heasksemphasi
zi
ng
eachandev
erysy
ll
abl
e
“
Isai
dIdr
ownedLwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Youar
ely
ing,
Icanseei
tiny
ourey
es.
Pl
easet
alkme”
“
Idon’
tknowwhatdoy
ouwantmet
o
say
”
“
I’
m noty
ourf
ool
Mir
aMt
himkhul
u”he
war
ns
“
Iswear
”
“
Pleasedon’
ttel
lmet
hatmandi
d
somet
hingt
oyou,
IswearMi
raI
…”Icut
hi
m of
f
“
Hedi
dn’
tdoany
thi
ng,
lett
hisgookay
”
“
Hey
,youcant
rustme”hecar
essesmy
cheekmaki
ngmeweak.If
indmy
sel
f
si
ngi
ngl
i
keacanar
y
“
Dammi
twhatt
hef
uckwher
eyou
t
hinki
nghuh!Howcoul
dyoubeso
sel
fi
sh?
”Hel
et’
sgoofmyhandsand
st
andsup
“
Iwant
edt
ofr
eeherf
rom t
hispai
n
Lwandl
elwenkosi
”Idef
endmy
sel
f
“
Bul
l
shi
t!Doy
ouhearme,
that
’sbul
l
shi
!
Howdoy
out
hinkki
l
li
ngy
our
sel
fwoul
d
hav
emadet
hesi
tuat
ionbet
ter
!Youar
e
egocent
ri
cMi
ra!Whati
fyoudi
edhuh?
Howwasy
ourmom goi
ngt
ofeel
asi
f
she’
snotgoi
ngt
hroughenoughal
ready
!!
HowwasIgoi
ngt
ofeel
!Whatabout
Gugu?Ihav
enev
erseensuchsel
fi
sh
per
soni
nmyl
i
fe!
”Icoul
dn’
thel
pbutcr
y
hi
swor
dsar
etear
ingmyhear
tint
wo.
“
Iwast
ryi
ngt
ofr
eeherf
rom al
lthi
spai
n
she’
sendur
ingbecause…”hecut
sme
of
fIcanhearhe’
smov
ingupanddown.
Ican’
tmi
sshowangr
yhei
s
“
Idon’
tknowhowi
twor
ksi
nyourwor
ld
buti
nther
eal
wor
ldi
tdoesn’
twor
kli
ke
t
hat
!Youdon’
tgoar
oundcommi
tt
ing
sui
cidej
ustbecausey
ouar
esav
ingt
he
peopl
eyoul
ovef
rom endur
ingpai
n!I
t
j
ustdoesn’
twor
kli
ket
hat
.That
’ssel
fi
sh
andchi
l
dish!
!”
“
Fucky
ou,
doy
ouhearme!Fucky
ou!
Yout
hinki
t’
seasyt
otakeadeci
siont
o
endy
ourl
i
fel
etal
onedoi
ngi
t?Noone
want
stodi
eLwandl
elwenkosi
,no
mat
terhowt
hebi
bleort
hepast
orsor
whoev
ert
ryt
ocandycoati
t.Wedon’
t
knowwhathappensi
ntheaf
ter
li
fe,
all
of
t
heset
hingst
heysayaboutgoi
ngt
o
heav
enandwhatnotar
ejust
assumpt
ions.Wear
eal
lscar
edoft
he
unknown.I
fwewer
etochoose,
Iknow
al
lofuswoul
dchooset
oli
veunt
il
et
erni
tybuthey
.Fi
ne,
youcal
lmesel
fi
sh
butmyr
easonbehi
ndsui
cidewasnot
sel
fi
sh.Cal
lmeegocent
ri
c,i
tsf
inebut
y
ouar
enott
heonewho’
sal
way
s
r
emi
ndedbyy
ourmot
hert
hatshe’
s
endur
ingabusebecauseofy
ou.Youar
e
nott
heonewhohast
oli
stent
oher
scr
eami
ngev
eryni
ghtbeggi
nghi
mto
st
opbutt
henex
tmor
ningshepl
ayst
he
happywi
fef
ory
ou!Youar
enott
heone
whol
i
vewi
thf
eart
hatoneoft
heseday
s
hewi
l
lbeatherupt
odeat
h!Youar
enot
t
heonewhof
eel
sli
keabur
den!Youar
e
nott
heonewhobr
oughtsomuchpai
n
i
nyourmom’
sli
fe,
fir
stshewaski
cked
outi
nherhomebecauseshewas
pr
egnantwi
thmeasi
fthatwasnot
enoughIt
urnedoutt
obebl
i
nd,
acur
se
ofachi
l
dwhoI
shopel
essandhel
pless.
Thi
sisonet
hingIcoul
dhav
eev
erdone
f
orhert
osetherf
ree.YesIadmi
tI
di
dn’
tthi
nkmet
icul
ousl
yaboutt
hisbut
t
hatdoesn’
tmeany
oushoul
ddownpl
ay
myf
eel
i
ngsnorj
udgemydeci
sion.I
’
m
t
heonewhoknowshowi
t’
sli
ket
obe
Mi
raandI
’
mtheonef
aci
ngwhatI
’
m
goi
ngt
hroughev
eni
fyouwer
etot
ry,
y
oucannev
erst
epi
nmyshoes,
sodon’
t
y
oudar
emakemef
eel
li
keI
’
m ahor
ri
ble
per
sonbecausei
fki
l
li
ngmy
sel
fwas
goi
ngt
ohel
pthesi
tuat
ionl
i
keIt
hought
i
twoul
d,Iwoul
ddoi
tagai
nandagai
nto
sav
emymot
herf
rom t
hishel
lhol
e!”I
’
m
gaspi
ngbet
weent
ear
sasIshoutathi
m.
“
Phumaf
uthi
”(getout
)
“
Dol
l
faceI
’
m sor
ry”
“
Isai
doutLwandl
elwenkosi
,Idon’
twant
t
oseey
ouagai
nandIdon’
tev
enknow
whyIev
erent
ert
ainedy
ouf
rom t
he
begi
nni
ng.
”Hesi
tsnex
ttomeandhol
d
myhands
“
Babypl
easeI
’
m sor
ry….
”
“
I’
m noty
ourbaby
,Idon’
tneedpeopl
e
l
i
key
oui
nmyl
i
fe.WhenIt
hinkabouti
t
now,
Iseet
hatImadeawr
ongdeci
sion
buty
oucoul
dhav
efoundawayt
otel
l
met
hatnotmakemef
eel
li
kemy
f
eel
i
ngsdon’
tmat
ter
.Andt
hist
hingof
y
our
sshout
ingmei
sir
ri
tat
ingme,
I’
m
noty
ourchi
l
dawuphume!
”(Getout
)
“
I’
m sor
ryMi
rapl
easef
orgi
veme.Iwent
abouti
tthewr
ongwaypl
ease…”
“
Dudel
eav
eokay
!”
“
WhataboutKhumal
o,don’
tyouwant
met
ohel
pyout
obr
inghi
m down”
“
Noj
ustgoman”
“
Buty
ourmom.
..
”
“
Letherbe”Her
eleaseahugesi
gh
“
I’
m sor
ry,
I’
mreal
l
ysor
ry.Ihopey
ou
f
indi
tiny
ourhear
ttof
orgi
veme”He
cat
chesmeof
fguar
dwi
thpeckonmy
l
i
pst
henmakehi
swayout
.
“
Suncabuz
aabaf
anamanj
e”(
youar
e
ki
ssi
ngboy
snow)
“
Hel
l
otoy
out
oomal
umeSox
”Ican
hearhi
sfoot
stepsashemakeshi
sway
t
owar
dsmybed
“
Angi
ythandi
lent
wanamt
wanakwamel
e
udl
alel
ekudenay
o”(
Idon’
tli
ket
hatboy
babyy
ouhav
etost
ayawayf
rom hi
m)
“
Why
?”
“
Hay
iuf
unani
kuwe”(
Whatdoeshewant
f
rom y
ou)Ishr
ugmyshoul
der
s.
“
Don’
tal
l
owhi
mtopl
acehi
spar
aly
zed
l
i
psony
ourcut
eli
psagai
n”Igi
ggl
e
“
Don’
tlaughmt
wanaI
’
m ser
ious.
..
her
e
t
akemyhandker
chi
efandwi
pey
our
l
i
ps”Hehandsmet
hehandker
chi
efIdo
ashesaygi
ggl
i
ng.
“
GoodIbr
oughty
ourf
avour
it
esandwi
ch
br
eadwi
thbut
terandpeanutbut
ter
”
“
Thanky
oumal
umeSox
”
“
Ohandl
i
tchi
jui
ce”Hepl
acesmy
sandwi
chonmyl
apsandIst
arteat
ing
ev
ent
houghI
’
mful
lIdon’
twantt
o
di
sappoi
nthi
m.Spendi
ngt
imewi
th
mal
umeSoxi
sni
cebecausehemakes
mel
augh.

Fewday
shav
epassedI
’
m outof
hospi
tal
nowanddoi
ngokay
.Khumal
o
mov
edoutofourhousei
ndeedbuthe
comest
oseeusev
eryday
.
Lwandl
elwenkosi
hasbeencal
l
ingnone
st
opf
ort
hepastf
ewday
sIdon’
tknow
whyhecan’
tjustgeti
tthatwhat
ever
t
hatwasgoi
ngonbet
weenusi
t’
sov
er.
I
t’
sbeenawhi
l
esi
nceIspendt
imewi
th
mymom,
justt
het
woofus.Todayshe’
s
t
aki
ngmeoutt
othemov
ies.
“
Babyy
ouhav
eadel
i
ver
y”
“
From whoandwhat
’st
hat
?”
“
Idon’
tknow…i
t’
sabi
gwhi
tet
eddyand
y
ourf
avour
it
echocol
atesher
e”She
handsmet
hebi
gfl
uff
yteddybearand
t
heboxofchocol
ates.Thet
eddybear
smel
l
sofhi
sscentandj
ustknewwho
i
t’
scomi
ngf
rom.
“
Her
e’st
hecar
d”Igi
vehert
het
eddyand
chocol
atet
henr
eadst
hecar
d.Dol
l
face
I
’
m sor
ryInev
ermeantt
ohur
tyou.I
knowIcanbeaj
erkatt
imes,
please
f
orgi
veme.Letmemakei
tupt
oyou
Mashwabadapl
ease.Lov
eyourdough.I
smi
l
ebuti
fhet
hinkshecanbuymy
f
orgi
venesshegotanot
hert
hingcomi
ng.
Ther
e’snot
hingIhat
emor
ethanpeopl
e
downpl
ayi
ngmyf
eel
i
ngs.I
tmakesme
mad!
“
Mmhht
hatsmi
l
ewhatdoest
hecar
d
say
”mom say
s
“
Not
hingMom”
“
Comeonl
etmesee”
“
Ah.
ah…l
et’
sgonow”
“
Ithoughty
ousai
dyounol
ongerf
ri
ends
wi
tht
her
udeboy
”
“
True”
“
Sowhyi
shesendi
ngy
ougi
ft
s”
“
Whosai
dit
’shi
m?”
“
Hai
boMi
radon’
tgi
vemeahear
tat
tack
t
u,Kanthowmanyboy
fri
endsdoy
ou
hav
e?”Igi
ggl
e
“
NoneMama.
..
Letmegoputt
hisi
nmy
bedr
oom t
henwewi
l
lgo”It
aket
he
t
eddybeart
omybedr
oom t
henwel
eav
e.
West
artatmuggandbeanandhav
e
chocol
atecake,
It’
smom’
sfav
our
it
e,
af
tert
hatwegot
owat
chamov
ie.Lat
er
wedr
ivet
othehot
elwher
emom had
or
gani
zedspaf
orus.I
tsf
eel
sgood
bei
ngpamper
edoncei
nawhi
l
e,
especi
all
yaf
tert
hesest
ressf
ulpastf
ew
day
s.Spendi
ngt
imet
oget
her
,justt
he
t
woofusmademer
eal
i
zet
hat
somehowwedr
if
tedabi
tapar
tov
er
t
heset
woy
ear
s.I
’
m gl
adwehadt
imet
o
spendt
odayj
ustt
het
woofusandi
t
r
emi
ndedmeoft
hegoodol
dti
mes
wheni
twasj
ustmeandher
.Wear
ejust
si
tt
ingonbedhav
ingwi
neandmom i
s
r
eadi
ngabookf
ormewhenwehear
al
ter
cat
ionont
heot
hersi
deofourhot
el
r
oom.
“
Bonga!
!Wher
eisshe!
!!Iwantt
oseemy
wi
fe!
!!
!”Ohl
ordher
ewegoagai
n.

.
300comment
s1kl
i
kes
CHAPTER9

It
houghtmom sai
dhe’
sgi
vi
ngusspace
t
obr
eat
hewhi
l
ehef
ixeshi
msel
fbuthe
soundsangr
yandIcan’
thel
pbutf
ear
f
orourl
i
ves.Khumal
ohast
hisdeep
v
oiceandi
t’
sscar
ywhenhe’
syel
l
ing
andangr
y,i
tst
heki
ndofv
oicet
hatcan
makey
oupeeony
our
sel
f.
“
Bonga!
!”Ihol
dmymom aswear
e
seat
edont
hebedt
oget
her
.
“
I’
m her
e!”Mom shout
sback,
Icanhear
t
hatshe’
str
yingt
obecal
m butherv
oice
i
snotconv
inci
ngenough,
that
'swhat
f
eardoest
oyou.Shest
andsup.
“
Khumal
o”t
heat
mospher
ebecome
t
enseandhor
ri
fi
c
“
Wher
eishehuh!
!!
”
“
Who?
”Mom askst
ryi
ngt
obecal
m as
shepossi
blycanbuthert
remul
ous
v
oicei
sbet
ray
ingher
.
“
Thebast
ardt
haty
ouar
efucki
ng!
!”
“
What
?Ican’
tbel
i
evey
ouwoul
dthi
nkof
t
hatKhumal
ooutofal
lthi
ngs.
”
“
Hey
,hey
,don’
tyoudar
emakemey
our
f
ool
!Yout
houghtIwon’
tfoundouthuh
wher
eishe!
!!
!wheeeear
eyouhi
ding
hi
m??asshol
ecomeoutf
acemel
i
kea
manandst
ophi
ding!
!!I
’
m notsur
ewhat
he’
sdoi
ngbutIcanhearbangi
ng
sounds.
“
JesusVusi
,ther
e’snooneher
e.Idon’
t
knowwhaty
ouar
ethi
nki
ngbuti
t’
sonl
y
Mi
raandIher
e.Wej
ustwant
edt
o
spendani
ghtawayf
rom homeand
wor
konourr
elat
ionshi
pthat
’sal
l
.I’
m
notcheat
ingony
ou,
Iwi
l
lnev
erdot
hat
.
Il
ovey
ousomucht
odot
hatt
oyou”
mom say
str
yingt
odef
endher
sel
fbut
Khumal
oisconv
incedt
hatmom i
s
cheat
ing.Ev
eni
fshewascheat
ingshe
woul
dhav
enev
erbr
oughtmeher
ewi
th
her
,whycan’
tthi
smant
hinkaboutt
hat
.
“
Youar
ely
ingt
omeBonga!
”
“
Iswea.
..
ouchy
ouar
ehur
ti
ngme
Khumal
o”shescr
eamsi
nagonyandI
’
m
si
tt
ingont
hebedwonder
ingwhati
she
doi
ngt
oher
.It
’sabl
essi
ngt
hatIcan’
t
seebecauseIwoul
dn’
tbeart
owat
ch
hi
m hur
ti
ngmymom butatt
hesamei
t’
s
acur
sebecausemay
beIwoul
dhel
pher
.
Twocanf
ightbet
tert
henone.
“
Uyaf
ebaBongahuh!
!”
“
I’
m notev
eni
fIwashowIwoul
dhav
e
donet
hatwi
thMi
raher
epl
ease
Vusi
muz
i”she’
scr
yingnow.Idon’
twant
t
oinv
olv
emy
sel
fjustl
i
kemom sai
dbut
I
’
mfai
l
ingt
odot
hat
.Hersobsar
e
sl
i
cingmyhear
tint
oti
nyl
i
ttl
epi
eces.
“
She’
stel
l
ingt
het
rut
hdaddy
,Iswear
”I
saywi
that
ear
yinv
oice.
“
Youshutt
hehel
lup!
!!
!”Idon’
tknow
whenbutev
ery
thi
nghappenssof
ast
andf
oramomentIl
ostmymi
nd.An
ex
cruci
ati
ngpai
nthathi
tri
ghti
ntomy
st
omachasI
’
mly
ingdownont
hef
loor
br
ingsmebackt
oear
th.I
’
m st
il
ltr
ying
t
orecov
erf
rom t
hatpai
nanot
herone
f
oll
owsr
ightt
hroughmychestandI
st
opbr
eat
hing.Icanhearmymom’
s
v
oicescr
eami
ngi
nagonyf
rom a
di
stance
“
Vusi
muz
ipl
easeshe’
sjustachi
l
d,she
di
dn’
tdoany
thi
ngpl
easest
opi
t!
!”Isee
myl
i
feendi
ng.
“
Vusi
please,
I’
m beggi
ngy
ou!
!”
“
Mir
a,baby
!”Idon’
thav
eener
gyt
out
ter
awor
d.
“
Wear
egoi
nghomenow!
!”
“
Wehav
etot
akehert
othehospi
tal
!!
”
cr
iesmymom asshecr
adl
esmel
i
kea
babyi
nherar
ms.
“
Isai
dwear
egoi
nghome,
getupand
l
et’
sgo!
!”
“
Mir
acany
ouhearme?
”
“
YesIcanheary
oumom”Icr
y
“
Tryt
ogetupbabyokay
”Inod,
she
hel
psmeup.
Wear
enowi
nthecardr
ivi
nghomeI
’
m
pr
essedagai
nstmom’
sbosom asIsob
si
l
ent
ly.If
eel
war
mli
qui
dfal
l
ingonmy
f
orehead,
Ijustknewshe’
scr
yingand
t
hatbr
eaksmyhear
tev
enmor
e.
Oncewear
ri
veathome,
shegi
vesme
pi
l
lsf
orpai
nthent
uckmei
n.
“
I’
m sosor
rysweet
hear
t”Isaynot
hing
andcr
ynott
hatIhav
esomet
hingt
osay
.
I
’
minsomuchpai
nri
ghtnowbut
not
hingbeat
stheoneshr
eddi
ngmy
hear
tint
opi
eces.
“
Bonga!
!!
”
“
I’
m comi
ng!
!”Sheki
ssesmyf
orehead
andmakesherwayout
.Ift
hisi
swhat
shemeantbysay
ingshegott
hisandI
shoul
dtr
usthert
henIhav
etost
eel
my
sel
fbecauset
her
e’smor
ecomi
ng.
Myhear
tski
psabeatasIhearher
scr
eami
ngandIj
ustknewt
odayi
t’
sthe
endofherbutt
hemor
eaudi
bleher
scr
eamsbecomesIf
eel
ever
yli
tt
lepar
t
ofmedy
ing.Howni
ce,
he’
sget
ti
nga
v
agi
naasar
ewar
dforbeat
ingmeup.I
don’
tknowwher
emyphonei
sIwoul
d
bel
i
steni
ngt
omusi
cinst
ead.
Icanf
eel
hispr
esenceandt
hesmel
lof
hi
scol
ogneper
vadedt
heai
r.Fearwr
aps
ar
oundmeandmyhear
tbeatr
api
dly
.I
l
etoutasmal
lpee,
Iwantt
oscr
eam f
or
mom butIknowi
t’
susel
essbecause
she’
sscar
edofhi
m asmuchasme.
“
Mor
ningpr
incess”
“
Mo.
.mo.
.mor
ning”myv
oicei
shoar
se
f
rom al
lthecr
yingIdi
dlastni
ght
“
Heydon’
tbescar
ed,
Iwon’
thur
tyou”I
f
eel
hishandst
ouchi
ngmeandf
li
nch.
“
LookMi
ra,
I’
m sor
ryOkay
…Daddyi
s
sor
rysweet
hear
t.Idon’
tknowwhat
cameov
ermengi
yax
oli
sa”(
I’
m sor
ry)
Hesoundssi
ncer
ebuthewon’
tfool
me,
I
’
m notmom.I
’
m sur
ethi
siswhathe
hasbeensay
ingf
ort
woy
ear
sbutkept
doi
ngt
hesamet
hingov
erandov
er
agai
n.I
t’
sonl
yamat
teroft
imebef
ore
hebeathert
odeat
horbeatust
odeat
h.
Igott
opr
epar
emy
sel
fforoneoft
he
t
wo,
becauseonewi
l
ldef
ini
tel
ycome
t
rue.
“
It
’sokay
”Isaywi
thashi
ver
ingv
oice
“
I’
mreal
l
ysor
rysweet
hear
t,Iwi
shIcan
undoev
ery
thi
ngIdi
dlastni
ght
.Daddyi
s
goi
ngt
hroughsomest
uffbabybutI
pr
omi
sey
ouIwi
l
lfi
xmy
sel
ffory
ouand
y
ourmot
her
.Wewi
l
lbebackt
othat
happyf
ami
l
ywewer
e”Idoubtwewi
l
l
ev
erbehappyagai
n.Youbr
okeus
bey
ondr
epai
rs.Gonear
ethosegood
t
imesweusedt
ospendt
oget
her
.I
r
ememberhowheusedt
otakemet
o
t
hepar
kandwewoul
dhav
efun
t
oget
herj
ustt
het
woofus.HowcanI
f
orgetmybi
rt
hday
s,asmuchasi
twas
f
rust
rat
ingbuti
twasal
sol
ovel
ytot
rav
el
ar
ound.Wespentmyl
astbi
rt
hdayi
n
CapeTownandt
hisy
earhesai
dwear
e
goi
ngov
erseasbuti
t’
scl
eart
hatwon’
t
happen,
it’
sei
therIwoundbedeadorI
wi
l
lbemour
ningf
ormymom whi
l
e
endur
inghi
sfi
stsandki
cks.
“
Iheary
ouandIunder
stand”
“
Doy
ouf
orgi
vedaddy
?”
“
Yes”
“
Thanky
ousomuchmychi
l
d..
.br
eakf
ast
i
sreadypl
easej
oinus”Inodhet
hen
get
supandmakeshi
swayout
.It
ake
muf
fi
nandmakemywayt
othe
bat
hroom t
ofr
eshenupt
henj
oint
hem
f
orbr
eakf
ast
.
“
‘Mor
ningbaby
!”Sheat
tacksmewi
tha
hugandIscr
eam asshehur
tsme
“
OhI
’
m sor
ry,
I’
mreal
l
ysor
rysi
tdownI
di
shedupf
ory
ou”Isi
tdownandeatmy
f
oodwhi
l
eli
steni
ngt
omom anddad
f
orci
ngani
ceconv
ersat
ionandgi
ggl
es.
Thet
ensi
onandsomber
nessi
s
per
meat
ingi
nther
oom.OnceI
’
m done
wi
thmyf
oodIaskf
ormyphoneand
mom gi
vesi
ttomet
henImakemyway
t
omybedr
oom.Icur
lmy
sel
fint
oabal
l
andl
i
stent
omusi
cast
ear
smaket
hei
r
wayout
.Ihav
enev
eri
magi
nedt
hatmy
l
i
fewoul
dtur
noutl
i
ket
hiswi
thi
nabl
i
nk
ofaney
e.I
t’
sawhi
l
elat
erwhenIf
eel
t
hebedsi
nki
ngasi
tsaccommodat
es
someone.
“
Baby
”Shewr
apsherar
msar
oundme
“
I’
m sor
rymymi
racl
e”shewhi
sper
sin
myear
“
Don’
tbe,
youknowwhaty
ouar
edoi
ng.
Thi
sisy
oudoi
ngy
ourj
obasamot
her
andmeasachi
l
dnotquest
ioni
ngy
our
deci
sionsnory
ouract
ions.
”
“
OhMi
ra,
IknowI
’
mfai
l
ingy
ou.Iknow
babyandI
…”shepauseandIhearher
swal
l
owi
ngspi
tloudl
y
“
It
’sokaymom r
eal
l
y”myphoner
ings.I
wi
pemyt
ear
sandansweri
t.
“
Hel
l
o”
“
Dol
l
face”i
t’
sfunnyhowmyhear
tst
il
l
mel
ts,
nomat
terhowmadIam athi
m
“
Hey
”
“
Arey
oucr
yingy
ourv
oicei
shoar
se”hi
s
v
oicei
sfi
l
ledwi
thconcer
n
“
NoIhav
efl
ue”
”Iwantt
osayI
’
m sor
ryDol
l
face”
“
Doy
ouev
enknowwhaty
ou'
vedoneor
y
ouar
ejustapol
ogi
zi
ng”
“
Ofcour
seIknow”
“
I’
mli
steni
ng”
“
Comeout
side,
Iwi
l
ltel
lyouf
acet
o
f
ace”
“
Okay
,I’
m comi
ng“Ihangup
“
Mom Lwandl
elwenkosi
isout
sidet
he
gat
e,canIgot
ohi
m”
“
Youcan’
tgooutwi
tht
hatbl
uemar
kon
y
ourf
ace”Ihuf
f
“
Letmehi
dei
twi
thamakeupf
ir
st”She
get
supanddi
sappear
sthenshecomes
backt
ohi
det
hebl
uemar
konmyf
ace.
Whenshe’
sdone,
Imakemywayout
andmeetLwenkosi
out
sidehi
scar
.
“
Thanky
ousomuchf
orcomi
ngout
”He
squeez
esmei
nhi
sar
msandIscr
eam.
Hel
etsgoofmeasi
fI’
m bur
ninghi
m
“
What
’swr
ong?
”
“
Youhol
dmet
oot
ight
”Il
i
e
“
I’
m sor
rycomegeti
nthecar
”Hecl
oses
t
hedoorandent
ersi
nonhi
ssi
de.The
dr
ivei
sawkwar
dlysi
l
ence,
mymi
ndi
s
sof
araway
,absol
utel
ynother
e.
“
What
’swr
ong,
youdon’
tseem okay
?”
“
I’
mfi
ne”
“
I’
m sor
ryMi
raf
orshout
ingaty
ou”
“
Notonl
ydi
dyoushoutatme,
youwer
e
i
nsensi
ti
veLwandl
elwenkosi
.Youdon’
t
goar
oundmaki
ngsuchi
nsensi
ti
ve
comment
saboutasensi
ti
vet
opi
cli
ke
sui
cide.Cal
l
ingpeopl
esel
fi
shandwhat
noti
swr
ong.Youdon’
tknowwhatt
hey
ar
egoi
ngt
hroughbef
oret
heydeci
det
o
t
aket
hei
rli
ves.Taki
ngadeci
siont
oend
y
ourl
i
fei
sthehar
destdeci
sionev
er.
Justbecausey
out
hinky
oucannev
er
f
indy
our
sel
finasi
tuat
ionwher
eyou
f
eel
li
ket
aki
ngy
ourl
i
fedoesn’
tmean
y
oushoul
djudgeot
herpeopl
ecal
l
ing
t
hem names.Thi
siswhypeopl
ewi
l
l
keepsuf
fer
ingf
rom anx
iet
yand
depr
essi
onbecauset
her
ear
epeopl
e
l
i
key
ouwhoj
udgeoneschoi
ceshar
shl
y
i
nst
eadofmaki
ngt
hatper
sonr
eal
i
ze
t
hati
t’
snott
heendoft
hewor
ldand
gi
vi
ngt
hem hope.Whent
heyshar
ethei
r
pr
obl
emsni
thi
baf
unaukubukwawhen
t
heykeepqui
etanddi
einsi
deunt
ilt
hey
can’
ttakei
tany
mor
eni
thi
basel
fi
sh.
Let
’st
alkaboutr
apev
ict
imsespeci
all
y
t
hosewhocommi
tt
edsui
cidedoy
ou
t
hinkt
heywant
edt
otaket
hei
rli
ves?Of
cour
senotbutt
heycoul
dn’
ttaket
he
pai
nunt
ilt
heygav
ein.Peopl
esuf
feri
n
f
rontofusandwedon’
tseebecausewe
ar
etoobusyj
udgi
ngt
hem andt
he
momentweheart
hatt
hey
'vecommi
tt
ed
sui
cidewesayt
hey
’resel
fi
sh?What
aboutus,
ain’
twesel
fi
shf
orwat
chi
ng
t
hem suf
feri
nfr
ontusandt
urnabl
i
nd
ey
e?Ai
n’
twesel
fi
shf
orj
udgi
ngt
hem
whent
heyact
ual
l
yneedust
obet
her
e
f
ort
hem?Wecannev
erunder
stand
one’
sdeci
sionsunt
ilwewal
kami
l
ein
t
hei
rshoes.IknownowI
’
m goi
ngdeep
wewer
etal
ki
ngaboutmenotot
her
peopl
ebutIwasj
ustt
ryi
ngt
omakey
ou
r
eal
i
zet
haty
oucoul
dhav
eusedbet
ter
wor
dsandt
one.Umunt
ukwamel
e
umakheayumci
ndez
elengamagama
akho.Angal
l
iyouhav
ear
ightt
ohav
e
y
ourownopi
nionbutbecar
eful
that
y
ouropi
niondoesn’
tdest
roy
,choose
y
ourwor
dsespeci
all
yaboutsensi
ti
ve
t
opi
csl
i
kesui
cide,
rape,
pov
ert
yhi
v&
ai
dset
c.”
“
WowIhav
enev
ert
houghtabouti
tthat
waybutnowt
haty
ouj
ustt
oldmeI
r
eal
i
zet
hatwepeopl
etendt
ojudgeal
ot
i
nst
eadofput
ti
ngour
sel
vesi
nthat
cer
tai
nposi
ti
on.I
’
m sor
ryt
hatIwas
i
nsensi
ti
veandy
ell
i
ngpl
easef
orgi
veme.
I
’
m gl
ady
oudor
eal
i
zet
hatwasnota
wi
sedeci
siony
out
ook”
“
Yeahmom t
oldmei
nawayt
hatmade
mecomet
oar
eal
i
zat
ionandIhav
e
deci
dedt
oletherdeal
wit
hdadt
heway
t
hatshewant
sto.I
’
m notgoi
ngt
o
i
nter
fer
eany
mor
esheknowswhatshe’
s
doi
ngsot
hedeal
isof
f”
“
Whatno!Youcan’
tdot
hatMi
ra”
“
WhyNot
?”
“
Yourmom needsy
ourhel
p,shei
s
obv
iousl
yscar
edofy
ourf
ather
,youand
Iwi
l
lhel
pherout
”
“
Mom seemsl
i
keshe’
senj
oyi
ngt
his
pai
nLwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Exact
lywhoenj
oyspai
n?Sheneeds
hel
ppsy
chol
ogi
cal
l
y”
“
Ther
e’snot
hingwecandot
rustme
okay
,justl
ett
hisgo”
“
Soy
ougoi
ngt
owat
chhersuf
ferj
ust
l
i
ket
hat
?”
“
Whatchoi
cedoIhav
eLwandl
elwenkosi
?
Wear
est
uckwi
tht
hatmanandt
her
e’s
not
hingwecandoabouti
t”
“
Nonsenset
hei
nfor
mat
iont
hatwehav
e
onhi
m canhel
p,al
lweneedi
sapl
an
nj
e”
“
Whati
fhecat
chesus,
hewi
l
lki
l
lus
Lwandl
elwenkosi
.Thatmani
s
danger
ous”Iswal
l
owal
umpi
nmy
t
hroat
,pr
event
ingt
ear
sfr
om comi
ngout
.
“
Iknow,
trustmeIknow.That
'swhywe
hav
etot
akehi
m downhewon’
tseet
his
onecomi
ng.Al
lIwantf
rom y
oui
sto
pl
aydaddy
’spr
incesssot
hathedoesn’
t
not
icewear
eont
ohi
m”Ishakemyhead
no,
myt
ear
sinv
olunt
ari
l
yfal
l
ingdown
myf
ace.
“
HeyDol
l
face,
letmepul
lov
er”Hepul
l
s
ov
erandcomest
omysi
det
ocomf
ort
s
me
“
heypl
easedon’
tcr
yandl
etmehel
p
y
ou”Ishakemyhead
“
Why
,Idon’
tunder
standMi
ray
ouwer
e
sokeenaboutt
his,
nowy
ouar
elet
ti
ngi
t
go.Whathappened?
”
“
Not
hing,
Ihav
ejustr
eal
i
zedt
hati
fwe
doi
tmymom won’
tli
ket
hat
.Shel
oves
hi
m okay
”Hewi
pesmyt
ear
s
“
Inev
ert
houghtofy
ouassomeonewho
wearmakeup…wai
tnonono”Hewi
pes
mycheekbone“
Mir
aist
hatabl
ue
mar
k?”Icoul
dn’
tut
terawor
dbutbur
st
i
ntot
ear
s
“
Hehi
tyou,
didn’
the?Fuckkk!
!”Hey
ell
s
maki
ngmet
ojumpabi
t
“
I’
m sor
ry,
ohDol
l
faceI
’
m sor
rycome
her
e”Isnuggl
eonhi
schestl
ett
ingi
tal
l
out
“
Youseet
hisi
sther
easonwhywehav
e
t
ogetl
enj
a!Shhhi
t’
sgoi
ngt
obeokay
”
Heshushmeunt
ilI
’
m cal
m down
“
Wher
eel
sedi
dhehi
tyouent
leckwhat
happened”It
ell
him whathappened.
“
Thatbast
ard!Aski
esmyDol
l
facel
etme
see”Hepul
l
sbackandl
i
ftupmyt
-shi
rt
“
I’
m sor
ryokay
”Hepl
antki
ssesonmy
t
ummy
“
Wher
eel
se”
“
MychestbutIai
n’
tshowi
ngy
ou
becauseIdi
dn’
twearabr
a”
“
ButIdon’
tmi
nd”Ichuckl
e
“
Idomi
nd”
“
Wel
ltheni
fyousayso.
..
didy
oueat
?”
“
Yes”
“
Iknowwhatcancheery
ouup”He
cl
osest
hedoorandgot
ohi
ssi
de.We
dr
ive,
tal
ki
nggener
all
y.Wear
ri
vet
oour
unknowndest
inat
ion,
unknownt
ome
t
hati
s.Wet
aket
heel
evat
or
“
Wher
ear
eyout
aki
ngmet
o?”
“
Come,
wear
eher
e”Hehol
dsmyhand
andweent
ersomer
oom,
notsur
ewhat
r
oom t
hisi
s,butIt
rusthi
m.Hegr
eet
s
someguyandt
heysoundl
i
ket
heyknow
eachot
her
.Het
heni
ntr
oducesmet
o
hi
m.Xol
aishi
sname.
“
HeyMi
ra”say
stheguy
“
Hi”
“
Look,
Iknowt
haty
ouar
ewor
kingbut
cany
ougi
vemeandmygi
rlj
ustf
ew
mi
nut
est
ouset
hest
udi
o”
“
Sur
e,sur
emannopr
obl
em”
“
Comebaby
”OkayI
’
m babynow
“
Wear
eint
hest
udi
oandIknowt
hat
y
oul
ovesi
ngi
ngandi
twi
l
lcheery
ou
up.
”
“
Wear
einast
udi
oli
kef
orr
eal
?”
“
Yeahsi
ngmeachor
us”
“
ify
oupr
omi
semet
osi
ngachor
usf
or
met
oo”
“
Deal
”
“
Cool
”
Heputheadsetonmyhead
“
Themi
cisi
nfr
ontofy
ou…r
eady
”
“
Yes”
“
1.2.
3go”Isi
ngJessi
eJFl
ashl
i
ght
.I
f
eel
li
kei
t’
sar
ightsongt
osi
ngbecause
i
tex
plai
nshowIf
eel
att
hemomentand
whenI
’
m wi
thLwenkosi
Ifeel
whol
e
di
ff
erent
.I'
mint
hisdar
knessbuthe’
s
myf
lashl
i
ght
.If
eel
li
keIgotev
ery
thi
ngI
needwhenIgothi
m andandwhenI
l
ookar
oundIseeasweetl
i
fe.Gosh
doest
hatev
enmakesense?Imean,
I
har
dlyknowt
hisguy
!WhenI
’
m donehe
cl
apshi
shandsandhugsme
“
NoIcan’
tcompet
ewi
tht
hat
,youhav
e
suchanangel
i
cvoi
ce”
“
Itr
y”Ibl
ush
“
Lookather
,she’
sbl
ushi
ng”Igi
ggl
e
“
It
’sy
ourt
urnnow”
“
Iwant
edy
out
osi
ng,
Idon’
thowt
o
si
ng”
“
That
’sunf
air
”Ipoutmyl
i
ps
“
HowcanIsaynot
othatcut
eness”He
t
akest
heheadsetandImov
eawayabi
t.
Hest
art
ssi
ngi
ngShybyJai
Waet
for
d.
“
Ever
yti
mey
ouwal
kint
other
oom
Gotmef
eel
i
ngcr
azy
Shockmyhear
tboom boom
Anyot
herboywoul
dst
are
Butme,
Ilookaway
'
Causey
oumaki
ngmescar
ed
Tr
yin'
nott
obr
eat
he1,
2,3
Tr
yin'
nott
ofr
eakwheny
oul
ookatme
Got
tamakeamov
ebutIf
reez
e
Youdon'
thav
eacl
uewhaty
oudot
ome
Gi
rl
,youmakemeshy
,shy
,shy
Youmakemer
unandhi
de,
hide,
hide
Feel
li
keIgetl
osti
nti
me
Whenev
ery
ounearme
Gi
rl
,youmakemeshy
,shy
,shy
I
'
mfi
ght
in'
but
ter
fl
i-
fl
i-
fl
ies
Yeah,
youmakemel
osemymi
nd
Whenev
ery
ounearme
Gi
rl
,youmakemeshy
Oh”ohmanhegott
heeev
oice,
I’
m
smi
l
ingl
i
kear
etar
d,
“
Wow,
Inev
erex
pect
edt
hatf
rom y
ouMr
Nkosi
”
“
Iknowhey
”Hepul
l
smecl
oset
ohi
m
wi
thmywai
st.Icanf
eel
hiswar
m
br
eat
hcar
essi
ngmyf
aceandhi
s
heav
enl
yscenti
smaki
ngmedi
zzyi
na
goodway
.Idon’
tknowi
fther
e’ssucha
t
hing
“
Wenanokubashy
?Comeon”Hel
aughs
“
YoumakemeshyandwhenI
’
m shyI
t
ryt
obebr
aveandbecomer
ude.
”He
conf
esses
“
Ohy
eah?
”
“
Yeahy
ouar
ebehi
ndmyr
udenessy
az”I
gi
ggl
e.
If
eel
hisot
herhandsnaki
ngbehi
ndmy
neckandhi
swar
mli
pscar
essi
ng
agai
nstmi
ne.Myhear
tisbeat
ingl
oudl
y.
If
eel
li
keI
twi
l
lcomeoutofmymout
h.
Ourl
i
pscol
l
ide,
hesandwi
chesmyl
ower
l
i
psucki
ngi
tgent
lyandsl
i
phi
stounge
i
nmymout
hsl
owl
yandgent
ly
massagi
ngi
twi
thmyt
ounge.If
eel
an
el
ect
ri
cspar
kshoot
ingal
lov
ermybody
andbut
ter
fl
iesdanci
ngi
nmyt
ummy
.He
br
eakst
heki
ssandchuckl
es
“
Youhav
ethesweet
estl
i
psIev
ert
ast
ed
i
nmyl
i
fe”Ibl
ush
“
CanIki
ssy
ouagai
nbutt
hist
imey
ou
wi
l
lfol
l
owme”Inod,
Ihav
esomehow
l
ostmyv
oice.Hepr
esseshi
sli
pson
mi
neandcapt
urest
hem i
nhi
s.If
oll
ow
hi
slead,
justl
i
kehesai
dandweki
ss
sl
owl
yanddeepl
ymyhand
aut
omat
ical
l
ydr
opsmuf
fi
nandhol
dhi
m
cl
oset
ome.Ihearhi
m moani
ngsof
tl
y.
“
Wowf
astl
ear
ner
,ai
n’
twe”Igi
ggl
e
“
You’
rebeaut
if
ulDol
l
face”
“
Thanky
ouCuddl
eCakes”
“
Muf
fi
ndi
dyouheart
hat
?Youar
eno
l
ongerheronl
ycake,
Ihav
eal
so
qual
i
fiedt
obehercaket
ooy
ippee
y
ipeee“Igi
ggl
e.Webi
dfar
ewel
ltoXol
a
andt
hankhi
mthenwel
eav
e.Wespend
t
hewhol
edayt
oget
her
,cr
uisi
ngar
ound
Dur
banandsi
ngi
ngal
ongmusi
c.Our
dest
inat
ioni
sthebeach.West
rol
lbyt
he
beach,
handi
nhand,
tal
ki
ngand
l
aughi
ng.Sweetl
i
feIt
ell
you,
Ifor
got
aboutany
thi
nggoi
ngoni
nmyl
i
feand
enj
oywi
thmycuddl
escakes.Lat
ehe
dr
ivesmehome
“
Iwi
l
lcal
lyouy
ezwa”
“
Okayt
rav
elsaf
e”
“
Iwi
l
lmyDol
l
faceki
ssy
ourcuddl
e
cakesbef
orey
ougo”Hepul
l
smecl
oser
andweshar
eaki
sst
hatl
eav
esme
gaspi
ngandwant
ingmor
e
“
Bye”Igetoutoft
hecarandmakemy
wayi
n.Ihearanunf
ami
l
iarv
oiceofa
mant
alki
ngi
nthel
ounge
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evey
ouy
az!
”
“
Ungaz
ongi
dakel
wawenay
ousai
dI
mustgetr
idofi
tri
ght
?Igotr
idofi
tnow
deal
wit
hthat
!!
”
“
Youar
eadev
il”
“
Takesonet
oknowone!Getoutofmy
housebef
oremyhusbandcomesher
e
anddeal
wit
hyou!
!”Imakemywayi
n
“
Sani
bonani
”(Gr
eet
ings)
”
Ba.
.babyy
ouar
eback”
“
EhMama”
“
Ist
hisy
ourdaught
er”askst
heman
“
Eywenay
ouar
est
il
lher
ego!
!”
“
Chi
l
dhowol
dar
eyou?
”
“
I’
mtur
ning1….
”
“
That
’snoneofy
ourbusi
nessl
eav
e
Skhal
ohawu!
!!
”
By
e!!
!”Say
stheman
“
Whowast
hat
?”
”
Noonei
mpor
tant
”
“
OkayI
’
m goi
ngt
ogetsomesl
eep”
“
Ithoughty
ouar
egoi
ngt
oshar
ewi
th
mehowy
ourdaywi
tht
her
udeboywas”
“
I’
mti
red,
someot
hert
ime”AsImake
mywayt
othebedr
oom,
shecal
l
sme
“
Ma”
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomom”Iwal
ktomy
bedr
oom andcr
awl
onmybed.Whoi
s
t
hatmanandwhywasheaski
ngmyage?
Mom gotr
idofwhat
?Issher
eal
l
y
cheat
ingondad?Si
gh!Ishi
ftmymi
nd
t
othegooddayIhadwi
thcuddl
ecakes
andf
orgetaboutev
ery
thi
ngasasmi
l
e
t
ugst
hecor
ner
sofmymout
h.

.
300comment
s1kl
i
kes
HappyBi
rt
hdayZarHi
a

CHAPTER10

Hopei
saf
eel
i
ngofex
pect
ati
onand
desi
ref
orapar
ti
cul
art
hingt
ohappen.
Hopei
sseei
ngl
i
ghti
nspi
teofbei
ng
sur
roundedbydar
kness.I
nZul
uwesay
“
It
hembaal
i
bul
ali
”whi
chmeanshopei
s
whatkeepsusgoi
ng.Wi
thouthopewe
ar
edeadbuti
nmyci
rcumst
ances,
it’
s
t
heot
herwayar
ound.Hopei
ssl
owl
y
ki
l
li
ngmef
rom i
nsi
de.I
t’
sli
keasl
ow
poi
son,
kil
l
ingmebi
tbybi
teachpassi
ng
day
.Ihat
ethatIst
il
lhopet
hathewi
l
l
changeev
enaf
tert
het
woy
ear
sof
abuse.Ihat
ethatIst
il
lhopehewi
l
l
changeaf
terl
ayi
nghi
shandonmy
daught
er.Don’
tlookatmel
i
ket
hat
.I
oncesai
dthi
sandI
’
m st
il
lgoi
ngt
o
r
epeati
t.Youwi
l
lnev
erunder
standunt
il
y
ouwal
konmyshoes.
Inev
ert
houghtonedayIwoul
dwakeup
t
othi
sabusi
vehusband.Wewer
eso
happyandev
ery
thi
ngchangedwi
thi
na
bl
i
nkofaney
e.HadIknownt
hathe
woul
dtur
noutl
i
ket
his,
Iwoul
dn’
thav
e
mar
ri
edhi
mint
hef
ir
stpl
acebuti
tis
whati
tisandt
her
e’snot
urni
ngback.
I
’
mint
odeepandIcan’
twal
koutand
t
akeawayev
ery
thi
ngt
hatIcan’
tpr
ovi
de
f
ormydaught
er.Idon’
twantt
otake
awayt
heonl
yli
fet
hatmadehert
owar
m
upandembr
aceherdi
sabi
l
ity
.Itwas
nev
ermypl
ant
obeahousewi
fe,
Ihav
e
al
way
sbeenambi
ti
ousbutwhenmy
husbandsai
d“Ihav
eal
lthemoneyt
his
wor
ldcanbuy
,nowi
feofmi
newi
l
lwor
k”
Ihadnosayont
hatbecausewhenmy
husbandsaysomet
hing,
hiswor
dgoes
andIwasdeepl
yinl
ovet
othi
nkoft
he
f
utur
e.Ev
ery
thi
ngseemedsoper
fect
,
t
hel
ovehewasshower
inguswi
thev
ery
si
ngl
eday
.Thewayhewasso
ov
erpr
otect
iveandcar
ing.Het
reat
edus
l
i
kewewer
etheonl
ygi
rl
sthatex
ist
edi
n
t
hewor
ldandIcoul
dn’
tbemor
egr
atef
ul
whenheaccept
edMi
raashi
sownchi
l
d.
I
tfel
tgr
eatt
ohav
esomeonewho
showedt
hathet
rul
ycar
edf
oronce.
Vusi
ismyf
ir
stt
hroughev
ery
thi
ngokay
may
benotev
ery
thi
ngsi
nceMi
rai
snot
he’
schi
l
d,shewasnev
ercr
eat
ed
t
hroughl
ovebutt
hat
’sast
oryf
or
anot
herday
.

Ihav
etopr
epar
emy
sel
f,i
t’
smy
husband’
ssecondsessi
onwi
thhi
s
psy
chol
ogi
standI
’
m goi
ngwi
thhi
m
t
oday
.Hehast
wosessi
onsaweek,
MondayandFr
idayofwhi
chIt
hinki
t’
s
notenoughi
fitwasf
ormehewoul
dgo
ev
ery
day
.Ihav
ejustf
ini
shedt
aki
nga
showerandmoi
stur
izi
ngmybodynow
I
’
m get
ti
ngdr
essed.Thesuni
supand
bl
azi
nghotsoIopt
edf
oraGucci
redof
f
shoul
dershor
tsl
eev
ebody
condr
ess
wi
thbl
ackGucci
suedepl
atf
orm sandal
s.
Icompet
ethel
ookwi
thr
osegol
d
accessor
iesandl
etmycur
lyweav
elose.
Iappl
yjustl
i
pst
ick,
Idon’
twantt
omess
upmymakeupwi
tht
ear
sjusti
ncase
t
hesessi
ongeti
ntense.It
urnonce
mor
e,st
ari
ngatmy
sel
fint
hemi
rr
or.I
l
ookbeaut
if
ulasal
way
s,Il
ovedr
essi
ng
upandl
ooki
nggoodbecausewheny
ou
l
ookgoodandsmel
lgoody
ouf
eel
good.
Noonecanev
ennot
icet
hepai
nyouar
e
har
bor
ing.

It
wit
chmywr
istandcheckt
het
ime,
it
r
eads10:
30am t
hesessi
onst
art
sat
11:
30myhusbandwi
l
lbeher
eany
momentf
rom nowt
opi
ckmeup.Imake
mywayoutt
ocheckonmydaught
er,
I
hadwokenherupbutt
omysur
pri
se
she’
sst
il
lsl
eepi
ng.Ov
ert
hesef
ewday
s
si
ncemyhusbandbeatherupshe’
s
av
oidi
ngme,
wehar
dlyspendt
ime
t
oget
her
.She’
sal
way
soutwi
thherr
ude
boyandwhenshecomesbackshel
ock
her
sel
finherbedr
oom cl
aimi
ngt
obe
t
ir
edandneedsomesl
eep.If
eel
li
ke
she’
ssl
i
ppi
ngt
hroughmyf
inger
sandI
f
eel
sohor
ri
ble.

“
Mir
acl
e”Ishakeherandshebl
i
nksher
beaut
if
ulhaz
eley
esopen.
“
BabyIsai
dwakeupy
ourf
atheri
son
t
hewaynow.Wegoi
ngt
ofet
chy
ou
whenwecomebackIwanty
out
obe
r
eady
”
“
Readyf
orwhat
?”Shey
awns
“
Itol
dyounj
eyest
erdayt
hatt
odayi
t’
s
f
ami
l
yday
,justt
het
hreeofus””shesi
ts
onherbut
t
“
I’
m sor
ry,
Ihav
epl
ansMom”Isi
ghand
si
tonherbednex
ttoher
“
Butbabyy
ouar
eal
way
sspendi
ngt
ime
wi
tht
her
udeboy
,weal
soneedy
our
at
tent
ion”
“
Hisnamei
sLwandl
elwenkosi
mom”I
r
oll
myey
es
“
Ofcour
sel
ook,
Ili
ket
haty
ouar
egoi
ng
out
,li
vi
ngl
i
fel
i
keev
eryt
eenager
sbut
t
hatdoesn’
tmeany
oushoul
dcutusout
ofy
ourl
i
fe”
“
I’
mtr
yingt
oteachmy
sel
fhowt
oli
ve
wi
thouty
oubecausesoonerorl
atert
hat
wi
l
ldef
ini
tel
yhappen”Ishutmyey
es
moment
ari
l
yandt
akeahugebr
eat
h,her
wor
dsf
eel
sli
keakni
fepenet
rat
ingi
n
myhear
t
“
I’
m sor
ry,
Idi
dn’
tmeant
osayt
hat
”she
say
sasi
fsher
eal
i
zedhowhur
tIam t
o
hearhersay
ingt
hat
.
“
Lookmom Lwandl
elwenkosi
makesme
happy
,whenI
’
m wi
thhi
m If
eel
li
ke
ev
ery
thi
ngi
sokay
.If
orgetabout
ev
ery
thi
ngt
hati
shappeni
ngher
e.Hei
s
myescapey
ouknow,
myescapef
rom
al
lthi
stur
moi
l
.Hei
sthehappi
nesst
hat
Ineedr
ightnow,
thehappi
nesst
hatI
needt
ohol
donf
oramomentbecause
dar
knessofsor
rowi
sont
hewaysooner
orl
ater
”Herf
acegl
owswhenshe
speaksaboutt
her
udeboy
,mybabyi
sin
l
ovebutherey
esgl
i
stenwi
tht
ear
swhen
shesay
sthel
astsent
ence.
“
Babyi
m notgoi
ngt
odi
e”Isaywi
ping
hert
ear
sthathadf
all
en
“
Youdon’
tknowt
hatmom”
“
IknowIwon’
t,
hewi
l
lchange.Iswear
”
shechuckl
esandshakesherheadi
n
di
sbel
i
ef
“
Ify
out
rul
ybel
i
evehewi
l
lchangeaf
ter
2y
ear
stheny
oumustbest
u…”Shest
op
her
sel
fandsi
ghs“
LookIdon’
twantust
o
f
ightbecauseal
lweev
erdonel
atel
yis
f
ightsot
hebestIcandoi
stost
ayout
ofy
ourbusi
nessl
i
key
ousai
d”
“
Stay
ingoutofmybusi
nessdoesn’
t
meany
oushoul
dcutmeoutofy
ourl
i
fe.
I
t’
sbeenf
ewday
sbutImi
ssy
ouso
muchMi
ra.
”
“
I'
m sor
ryt
haty
ouf
eel
li
keI
’
m
negl
ect
ingy
ou,
itwasnev
ermyi
ntent
ion
atal
l
.Tomor
rowI
’
m al
lyour
sokay
”
“
Okay
”
“
Ilov
eyoumommy
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oosweet
hear
t”Ipul
lheri
n
myar
msandcomf
ort
sher
,inhal
i
ngher
sweetscent
.
“
Whyar
eyousl
eepi
ngatt
hist
imedi
dn’
t
y
ousl
eepatni
ght
”
“
Uhm Idi
d”she’
sly
ingt
omesoIpul
lher
awayandl
ookather
“
Youar
ely
ingy
ouwakeupl
atet
hese
f
ewday
swhy”shesi
ghs
“
Ihav
eni
ght
mar
es”
“
Ohbabyy
ouwannashar
ethem?
”
“
Idr
eam aboutdadbeat
ingmeupunt
ilI
coul
dn’
tbr
eat
he”Isi
ghandenv
elopher
i
nmyar
msonceagai
n
“
Hewi
l
lnev
erbeaty
ouupev
eragai
n.I
pr
omi
sey
ouy
ezwa”
“
Okay
”Isenseuncer
tai
ntyi
nherv
oice
andi
tbr
eaksmyhear
tthatmydaught
er
nol
ongerf
eel
prot
ect
edandsaf
e.Si
gh!
“
Whydi
dn’
tyoucal
lmet
osl
eepwi
th
y
ou?
”
“
Idi
dn’
twantt
obot
hery
ou”
“
Youcannev
erbot
hermebaby
,fr
om
t
odayI
’
m sl
eepi
ngwi
thy
ou.Letmego
makesomet
hingf
ory
out
oeatbef
oreI
go”
“
Okay
”Il
etgoofherandst
andup
bef
oremaki
ngmywayt
otheki
tchent
o
f
ixhersomet
hingt
oeat
.OnceI
’
m done,
It
akeherf
oodt
oherbedr
oom.
“
Her
eyougo”
“
Thanky
ou.
..
let
seatt
oget
her
”
“
NoI
’
mfi
nebaby
,eat
”Iwat
chheras
sheeat
,cal
lmebi
asedbutmybabyi
s
beaut
if
ulbakwet
hu,
wit
hherchocol
ate
compl
exi
ont
hatcompl
ement
sherhaz
el
br
owney
es.I
’
ver
eal
i
zedt
hatt
hemor
e
shegr
owst
hemor
eshel
ooksl
i
kemy
f
ather
,ev
enherbeaut
if
ulhaz
eley
es.Out
ofal
lpeopl
e,di
dshehav
etol
ookl
i
ke
myf
atherbutt
hemanwasaney
ecandy
soI
’
m notcompl
aini
ng.Mi
rai
stal
land
pet
it
e,l
i
keherf
atherbutshegotabi
g
but
tandhi
psobv
iousofwhi
chshegot
f
rom me*
winks*
.Mi
nut
esl
atemy
husbandar
ri
ves.Igi
vemydaught
era
goodby
eki
ssandmakemywayout
af
tert
aki
ngmyhandbagandphone.
He’
swai
ti
ngf
ormeout
sidehi
scar
.He
l
ooksgor
geousi
nagr
eypant
sanda
y
ell
owvneckl
ongsl
eev
et-
shi
rtt
hat
compl
ement
shi
sdar
kchocol
ate
compl
exi
on.Hef
lashesawi
l
dsmi
l
eand
hi
swhi
tebeaut
if
ult
eet
hspar
kles,
oh
my
,heknowswhatt
hatsmi
l
edoest
o
me.If
inal
l
ymakei
ttohi
m wi
thmy
wobbl
i
ngknees
“
MaKhumal
o”
“
Mnt
ungwa”Hecapt
uresmyl
i
psi
ntohi
s
i
nasul
tr
yki
ssashi
shandssnake
ar
oundmybodyandsqueez
esmy
but
tock.
“
Howar
eyout
oday
”
“
I’
mfi
ne,
whatabouty
ou”
“
I’
m al
sof
ine.
..
Wil
lMi
rabef
ineal
one?
”
“
Yes,
shewi
l
lbeokay
”
“
Okay
,comel
etsgetgoi
ng”Heopens
t
hedoorf
ormet
henhewal
kst
ohi
ssi
de.
Thedr
ivei
sfi
l
ledwi
thl
i
ghtconv
ersat
ion
andabi
tofl
aught
er.Wear
ri
veandwe
gr
eetandmyhusbandi
ntr
oducesmet
o
her
.Honest
lyInev
erex
pect
edsomeone
soy
oungt
obet
heonewhot
ohel
pus.
Youcanseet
hat
’sshe’
sfr
eshf
rom
school
.Ibett
hisi
sherf
ir
sty
earwor
king
af
tergr
aduat
ion.Shemustbei
nher
ear
lyt
went
ieswhi
chmakesmewonder
howdi
dKhumal
ofi
ndt
hisone.No
of
fenseI
’
m notsay
ingy
oung
psy
chol
ogi
stdoesn’
tknowt
hei
rwor
k
butex
per
iencecount
s.
“
It
’sni
cet
omeety
ouMr
sKhumal
o”she
shakesmyhandandIkeepmyey
es
st
rai
ghti
ntoher
s.
“
Nicet
omey
out
ooMi
ssGama”
“
Youmaysi
tdownpl
ease”shepoi
ntsat
herbl
ackl
eat
hercouches,
meandmy
husbandmakeour
sel
vescomf
ort
abl
e.
Herof
fi
cei
sbeaut
if
ulandspaci
ous.
“
it
’sagoodt
hingt
haty
ouaskedy
our
wi
fet
ojoi
nust
odaymay
bey
ouwi
l
ltal
k
unl
i
kel
astt
ime”shesay
sasshesi
ts
downonherchai
r.
“
Yescanwegetst
art
edpl
ease”Isense
annoy
ancei
nhi
svoi
ce
“
MrKhumal
owhyar
eyouher
e?”
“
Whatdoy
oumean?
”Myhusbandasks
“
Imeanwhat
’st
her
easonbehi
ndal
lthi
s
sessi
onst
hatwear
egoi
ngt
ohav
e”
“
Tal
kisn’
tthatwhaty
ouar
edoi
ng
her
e?”Mi
ssGamanodsherheadand
scr
ibbl
esomet
hingdownonhernot
e
pad
“
Whatar
eyouex
pect
ingt
ogai
naf
ter
y
out
alked”
“
Idon’
tknow,
stopaski
ngst
upi
d
quest
ions!
”Inudgehi
m andshoothi
ma
“
cal
m down”l
ook.Hesi
ghs
“
I’
m sor
ry,
Idi
dn’
tmeant
oshout
.I
ex
pectsomechangesont
hewayI
behav
e”
“
Enl
i
ght
enmeabouty
ourbehav
ior
”
“
I…uhm.
..
Ibeatupmywi
fe”hest
utt
ers.
Mi
ssGamal
ooksatmeandIl
ookdown.
“
Why
?”
“
Idon’
tknow”hesay
s
“
Doesshepr
ovokey
ou?
”
“
Thi
sisst
upi
d!”
“
Babycomeon”Isayl
ooki
ngathi
m wi
th
pl
eadi
ngey
es
“
MrKhumal
owhaty
oumadet
ocome
her
e?Whatencour
agedy
out
ocome
her
e?”
“
Mywi
feanddaught
er.I
’
m doi
ngt
hisf
or
t
hem.Iwantt
ochangef
ort
hem”
“
It
’sagoodt
hingt
haty
our
eal
i
zey
ou
needt
ochange.Thef
ir
stst
epi
sto
acknowl
edget
haty
ouneedhel
pbutt
he
pr
obl
em i
syouwantt
odot
hisf
ory
our
wi
feanddaught
ernotf
ory
our
sel
f.I
thas
t
ost
artwi
thy
ouf
ir
stMrKhumal
o”
“
Nono,
I'
m sor
ryBonga,
thi
schi
tchati
s
notwor
kingf
orme!
!”Heget
supand
wal
kout
.Isi
ght
hisi
shar
dert
hanI
t
hought
“
I’
m sor
ryaboutt
hat
”Isay
“
It
’sokay
,Iunder
stand.I
’
m sor
ryf
or
whaty
ouar
egoi
ngt
hroughandI
’
m
wi
l
li
ngt
ohel
pyouandy
ourhusbandbut
y
ouhav
etoknowt
hati
fyourhusband
doesn’
tseet
heneedf
orhi
msel
fto
changet
her
e’snot
hingy
ouandIcan
do.
”
“
Hewant
stochange,
Iknowhedoes”
shesi
ghs
“
Her
e’smycont
act
sdet
ail
s,whenev
er
y
ouneedt
otal
k.I
’
m her
eory
oushoul
d
j
ustbookanappoi
ntmentf
ory
our
sel
f
onl
y.Youal
sogoi
ngt
oneedmyser
vice”
Il
ookathercar
dandt
akei
t
“
Thanks”It
henwal
koutwi
thaheav
y
hear
t.Igeti
ncarandhedr
ivesof
f
wi
thoutawor
d.He’
scl
enchi
nghi
sjaw
andt
hegr
ipont
hest
eer
ingi
stoot
ight
t
hatIcanseehi
shugehandspul
sing.I
t
rymybestt
okeepmymout
hqui
et
becauseIdon’
twantt
oant
agoni
zehi
m
mor
ebuthi
sdr
ivi
ngi
sver
yreckl
ess.
“
Hay
iKhumal
o,y
ouwantt
oki
l
lus!
”He
say
snot
hingandsl
ackenhi
sspeedunt
il
wear
ri
vehome.
“
Wheni
syournex
tappoi
ntment
?”Isay
aswemakeourwayi
nsi
det
hehouse
“
I’
m notgoi
ngt
her
eany
mor
e”
“
What
?”
“
Youhear
dme!
”
“
Yousai
dyouwi
l
lgethel
pVusi
muz
i!
”
“
Don’
tyoudar
erai
sey
ourv
oiceatme!
!”
“
Orwhathuh?Yougoi
ngt
oki
l
lmel
i
ke
y
ouki
l
ledourbaby
?”
“
Isai
dI’
m sor
ryaboutt
hatBonga”
“
Noy
ouar
enotsor
ryenoughbecause
y
ouar
eref
usi
ngt
ogety
our
sel
fhel
p
Vusi
muz
iKhumal
o.I
’
m si
ckandt
ir
edof
y
ourshi
t!
!Ican’
ttakei
tany
mor
e.For
t
wof
ucki
ngt
woy
ear
s,Ihav
ebeen
pat
ientwi
thy
ou!Maki
ngex
cusesf
or
y
ourbehav
iorbutnowI
’
m donedoi
ng
t
hat
!!
”Hesl
apsmehar
d,myv
isi
on
st
uddedwi
thst
ars
“
Youar
emi
ne,
doy
ouhearme!Youar
e
notl
eav
ingmeBonga!YouandIbel
ong
t
oget
her
,notev
endeat
hwoul
dsepar
ate
usbecausei
fyoudar
etr
ytor
unway
f
rom me,
Iwi
l
lfi
ndy
ouandki
l
lyou,
Mir
a
andmy
sel
f”
“
Whydon’
tyoudoi
tnowhuh!
!”Imake
mywayt
othedr
awerandt
akeoutabi
g
kni
fe
“
Her
etakei
tki
l
lusnow!
!”
“
Mommyno,
she’
ssor
rydaddy
!”Idon’
t
knowwhendi
dshemakeherwayi
n.
“
Takei
tKhumal
o!t
aket
hiskni
feand
st
apt
heshi
tofus!I
fthat
'swhatwi
l
l
makey
ouaman,
doi
tnow!
!”
Hel
ooksatmewi
thsomuchangerand
he'
sshaki
nguncont
rol
l
abl
y.Mi
rai
s
cr
ying.
“
Her
eist
hekni
fe!
!Angi
thi
yourar
eyour
f
ather
’sson!Youar
eawomanbeat
er
andachi
l
dabuser
,li
kehi
m!!
!Ni
yaf
ana
nseeee!
”HepunchesmeandIr
eel
back
butIdi
dn’
tev
enscr
eam.I
’
m usedt
othi
s
now.Al
li
tdoesnowi
snumbst
hebody
“
Goahead!Daddy
’sboyki
l
lus!
!”He
snat
chest
hekni
fef
rom meandwal
ks
t
oMi
ra.Idon’
tknowwhatI
’
m doi
ng,
the
r
agebur
ningwi
thi
nmei
scont
rol
l
ingme
andt
het
imeIr
eal
i
zei
t’
sal
readyl
ate.I
cl
osemyey
esshutashegr
absMi
rat
o
hi
msel
fandal
lIr
ememberi
sherl
oud
l
astpi
erci
ngscr
eam.

.
Twopr
evi
ouschapt
erst
argetwasnot
r
eachedl
et’
sseet
hisonewi
l
lreachi
t
bef
orewedosomecl
eani
ng.300
comment
s1kl
i
kes
HappyBi
rt
hdayNt
habel
engTsot
etsi

CHAPTER11

Webur
yourpai
nandangerunderour
ski
nandpr
etendt
hatev
ery
thi
ngi
sokay
butal
li
tdoesi
sgr
owi
nourv
einsand
hear
t,somedaywewi
l
lreachabr
eaki
ng
poi
nt.Iguessatsomepoi
ntt
hebot
tl
e
wasgoi
ngt
ocr
ackandpoural
lthepai
n
andangerIhav
ebeenbot
tl
ingf
ort
wo
y
ear
sandnowImi
ghtr
uemyi
mpet
uous
out
bur
st.

Ihav
enev
erbeent
hispet
ri
fi
edi
nmy
whol
eli
feandmyj
ackhammer
inghear
t
i
stheonl
ysoundIhear
.If
li
pmyey
es
openandf
oramoment
arymomentI
m
unabl
etomov
ejustst
ari
ngathi
m as
he’
scr
adl
i
ngmydaught
eri
nhi
sar
ms
l
i
keababyunt
ilhi
spani
cki
ngv
oice
snapsoutoft
heshockst
ateofmi
nd

“
Bri
ngwat
er!
!”Wat
erf
orwhatr
eason
butIdon’
tquest
ionhi
m andgof
etcha
j
ugofwat
er.
“
Her
e”Hepour
sal
lthej
ugonherf
ace,
I
’
mtr
yingt
ounder
standwhat
’sgoi
ngon
andmyey
esdar
ttoanunst
ainedkni
fe
ont
hef
loornex
ttous.Rel
i
efsur
ge
t
hroughme.
“
Mir
awakeup”Hesl
apshercheeks,
it’
s
onl
ynowIr
eal
i
zet
hatshef
aint
edohmy
poorbabyshemustbeenex
tremel
y
scar
ed.
“
Baby
,Mi
racl
e!”Ishakeherl
i
ght
lyand
pourt
hewat
eragai
nonherf
ace.She
bl
i
nksherey
esopenandcal
loutf
orme
gr
oggi
l
y
“
Mommy
”
“
Yesbaby
”Ipul
lherf
rom Vusi
’
sar
ms
andhol
dheri
nmyar
ms.Idon’
tknow
whatwoul
dhav
ebecomeofmehadshe
di
edonme.
“
I’
m her
ebaby
.I’
m her
e”myt
ear
swel
l
s
updeepi
nsi
deandt
ickl
edownmy
cheeks
“
Don’
tcr
ymommyatl
eastwear
e
t
oget
herbutIwashopi
ngIwoul
dseei
n
heav
en”myhear
tsi
nks
“
Youar
enoti
nheav
enbaby
…wear
enot
deat
h”
“
Dad.
..
”Bef
oreshef
ini
shesmyhusband
chi
rpsi
n
“
Iwi
l
lnev
erdot
hatmypr
incess”Her
bodyt
enseup.Idon’
tbl
amemy
daught
erf
orbei
ngscar
edoft
hisman
now.Thi
sisnott
hel
i
feIpl
annedf
orher
andi
tski
l
li
ngmedeepi
nsi
de.Weheara
bel
l
“
Iwi
l
lgogeti
t”say
smyhusbandashe
get
supt
oat
tendwhoev
eri
svi
sit
ing.
Fewsecondsl
aterhecomesbackandI
l
ookathi
minant
ici
pat
ion.
“
Itwassomeboy
,sai
dhe’
s
Lwandl
elwenkosi
.Hewant
edt
osee
Mi
rabutIt
oldhi
mtocomet
omor
row”I
r
emember
edt
hatt
heywer
esupposedt
o
gooutt
oday
.
“
Comemymi
racl
e,l
et’
sgett
ochange
bef
orey
oucat
chacol
d”Wegetupand
makeourwayt
oherbedr
oom.Imake
hersi
tdownonherbedt
henIl
ookf
or
herchangeofcl
othes.
“
Mommy
,I’
m sor
ry”herv
oicei
stear
ful
“
Forwhatbaby
”If
indherl
eggi
ngsand
v
est
“
Forev
ery
thi
ngIsai
dtoy
ounowIknow
whyy
oucan’
tleav
ehi
m,hewi
l
lki
l
lus”I
si
ghheav
il
yandhel
pherundr
ess.
“
It
’sokaybaby
.Iunder
standwhyy
ou
sai
dwhaty
ousai
d,pl
easedon’
tfeel
bad
abouti
t”
“
Ithur
tsmommy
…”shebur
sti
ntot
ear
s.
Isi
tnex
ttoherandcomf
ort
sher
“
ShhhI
’
m sor
ryOkay
..
.I
’
m sososor
ry
babybutIpr
omi
sey
oui
t’
sgoi
ngt
obe
okay
.Ij
ustdon’
tknowwhenandhow.I
wanty
out
oknowt
hatmommyl
oves
y
ousomuchy
ezwa”Shemumbl
es
somet
hingasshechokeonhert
ear
s.I
st
rokeherhai
randsi
ngonet
hingby
shaki
ra.Ihav
emadesomanymi
stakes
i
nmyl
i
febutmydaught
eri
stheone
t
hingt
hatIgotr
ightr
egar
dlessof
any
thi
ngt
hathappened.
“
Ever
ymor
ningwhenIwokeup
Iwaschokedup
Iwasl
eav
ingwi
thoutapur
pose
Al
way
sjumpi
ngal
lthehur
dles
Doi
ngci
rcl
esi
nthedar
kwi
thabr
oken
compass
Ican'
tex
plai
nthewayi
tfeel
s
Icoul
dtr
iponmyownwor
ds
Imakemi
stakes,
that
'smuchi
scl
ear
ButImadei
ther
emyl
ove
YeahImadei
ther
emyl
ove

Youar
etheonet
hingt
hatIgotr
ight
I
t'
sabi
gol
'wor
ld,
yeah,
it'
sabi
gol
'
wor
ld
Yout
urnt
hedar
knessi
ntosunl
i
ght
I
'
m al
uckygi
rl
,yeah,
I'
m al
uckygi
rl
Andi
fmessupev
ery
thi
ngsomeday
Iwoul
dhi
demyheadi
nshame
Causey
ou'
ret
heonet
hingt
hatIgot
r
ight
Onet
hingIgotr
ight
Onet
hingIgotr
ight

Ev
erymor
ningwheny
ouwakeup
Iwannahol
dyou
Ij
ustneedt
obewr
appedar
oundy
ou
I
t'
ski
ndaf
unnywheny
out
hinkt
haty
ou
j
ustgother
e
NowIknowIcan'
tl
iv
ewi
thouty
ou
Ican'
tex
plai
nthewayi
tfeel
s
Icoul
dchokemyownwor
ds
Somet
imesi
tseemsl
i
kei
tai
n'
treal
Li
key
ou'
rer
eal
l
yher
emyl
ove,
yeah,
y
ou'
rer
eal
l
yher
emyl
ove”
Isi
ngunt
ilIcoul
dn’
thearhersobsand
whenIl
ookather
,she’
sfastasl
eep.I
gent
lyl
ayheront
hebedandcov
erher
hal
fnakedbodywi
thaf
leecebl
anket
.
“
Ilov
eyousomuch”Iwhi
spert
oherear
t
henmakemywayt
othemast
er
bedr
oom t
ochangei
ntocomf
ort
abl
e
shoes.If
indmyhusbandsi
tt
ingont
he
f
loor
,hi
sbackl
eanedagai
nstt
hebed
andhi
sheadbur
iedonhi
shands.He
snuf
fl
esandt
hatal
ertmet
hathe’
s
cr
ying.I
t’
shear
t-
breaki
ngt
oseeacr
ying
Khumal
obecausei
ttakessomuchf
or
hi
mtocr
y.Her
atherbot
tl
euphi
spai
n.I
r
eleaseahugesi
ghandmakemywayt
o
hi
m af
tert
aki
ngof
fmyheel
s
“
Why
”IsayasIsi
tnex
ttohi
m
“
Whydi
dn’
tyouki
l
lher
?”Iaskagai
n,I
’
m
st
il
lsur
pri
seast
owhyhedi
dn’
tki
l
lher
.
Whatst
oppedhi
m becauset
hewayhe
gr
abbedher
,It
houghtmybabygi
rl
woul
dbehi
stor
yinaspl
i
tsecond.He
r
emov
eshi
sheadf
rom handsandl
ook
atmewi
that
ear
sst
ainedf
ace.
“
Icoul
dn’
t,
whenIl
ookedather
shi
ver
ing,
api
ctur
eofmy
sel
fwhenIwas
aboyf
lashedr
ighti
ntomyey
es.Iwas
scar
edl
i
keherandIev
enwetmy
sel
fbut
hedi
dn’
tcar
e.Hebeatmeupl
i
keI
wasn’
thuman”Hewi
peshi
stear
sbut
t
heykeepf
all
i
ng
“
Iknowy
ouar
eti
redofmyapol
ogi
es
andIf
ull
yunder
stand.I
’
m not
hingbuta
cr
uel
husbandandf
ather
,Idon’
tdeser
ve
t
hebot
hofy
ou.I
t’
sunf
airofmet
oask
t
hisbutbabyIneedy
ou.Wi
thouty
ouI
’
m
l
ost
,pl
easedon’
tgi
veuponme”Ishake
myheadi
ndi
sappr
oval
asaf
loodof
t
ear
sgushdownmyf
ace
“
I’
mti
redKhumal
o,Idon’
thav
est
rengt
h
any
mor
e.Thi
siswhatwehav
ebeen
doi
ngf
ort
woy
ear
s.Youbeatmeupand
t
ell
mey
ouar
esor
ry.Ngi
khat
hel
e”(
I’
m
t
ir
ed)Iwhi
speront
hel
astwor
d
“
Ipr
omi
seIwi
l
lchangeBongapl
ease”
Het
akesmyhandsi
ntohi
sandki
sses
t
hem
“
Tel
lmesomet
hingnew”
“
Iwi
l
lcommi
tmy
sel
ftocounsel
l
ing,
pl
easedon’
tgi
veuponme.I
’
m beggi
ng
y
ouMaKhumal
o.Il
ovey
ou,
Ilov
eyouso
much,
ifIl
osey
out
hent
her
e’s
absol
utel
ynol
i
fef
orme.Youar
emy
ev
ery
thi
ngIl
i
vef
ory
ougi
vemet
his
oncechance”
“
No.
.no.
..
no”Isaybutmyhear
tis
bet
ray
ingmymout
h.
“
Please”Hewhi
sper
sandpl
ant
ski
sses
al
lov
ermyf
ace
“
NoKhu…”Heshut
smeupwi
thaki
ss
andIwi
shIcansayIpul
lhi
m awaybut
hi
ski
ssesar
eli
keadr
ug.Theyar
e
hy
pot
oni
candmesmer
izi
ng.Iki
sshi
m
backt
ast
ingt
hesal
tofourt
ear
sast
hey
col
l
idei
nourmout
hs.If
eel
hishands
f
ondl
i
ngmybr
eastandamoanescapes
mymout
h.I
nabl
i
nkofasecondour
cl
othesar
efl
yi
ngont
heai
r,hebr
eaks
t
heki
ssandl
ooksatmewi
thbar
ely
openr
edey
es
“
Ilov
eyou”bef
oreIr
epl
yhesmashes
hi
sli
psonmi
neandki
ssesme.Ihol
d
hi
m cl
oserashepi
nsmedownont
he
f
loorandpr
esshi
swar
m bodyagai
nst
mi
newi
thoutbr
eaki
ngt
heki
ss.Hi
sone
handi
spi
nchi
ngandr
oll
i
ngmyni
ppl
e
whi
l
etheot
heri
sgent
lyr
ubbi
ngmycl
i
t
upanddown.Ibi
temyl
i
ptr
yingt
ost
if
le
mymoansofpl
easur
eashequi
ckens
hi
space,
int
ensi
fyi
ngt
hepl
easur
e.
“
OhhhhmyGod!
!!
”Hewi
thdr
awshi
s
f
inger
sandsl
i
det
hem i
nmymout
h,
al
l
owi
ngmet
otast
emy
sel
finhi
s
f
inger
sIbi
tehi
sfi
nger
shar
dmaki
ng
hi
mtogr
oanasheent
ershi
msel
fwi
th
onepushf
il
li
ngme.
“
Uhhhhhhhhhhhh”
Her
oll
hishi
ps,
lay
ingal
lhi
sraw
f
eel
i
ngsandemot
ionswi
theachst
roke
andsoot
hingev
eryt
hrobbi
ngscarwi
thi
n
mysoul
.Wegoal
ldayl
ongsweat
ing
andmoani
ngunt
ilwer
eachourcl
i
max
.

Imusthav
epassedoutbecausewhenI
wakeupI
’
m ont
opofourbedcov
ered
wi
thaduv
et.Igetupandpul
lar
obe
ov
ermynakedbodybef
oregoi
ngt
othe
bat
hroom t
opee.OnceI
’
m doneIwash
myhandsandheadbackt
oour
bedr
oom.Icheckt
het
ime,
itr
eads
7:
00pm.Theox
tai
lar
omaf
il
lsmy
nost
ri
lsasImakemywayt
otheki
tchen
andt
her
ehei
s,al
lsex
yinanapr
ononl
y
andpant
s.It
houghthel
eft
,he
acknowl
edgesmypr
esenceandl
ooks
upatmesmi
l
ing.
“
Youar
eawake,
dinnerwi
l
lber
eadyi
na
second,
youcangocal
lourdaught
eri
n
t
hemeant
ime”sadnesswr
apsar
ound
measi
thi
tmehar
dthatal
lthi
s
sweet
nesscanchangewi
thi
naspl
i
t
second.Isohat
ehi
sfat
herasmuchasI
don’
tknowhi
m.Her
uinedagoodman
notj
ustaman,
myhusbandt
heonet
hat
Il
ovef
rom t
hedept
hofmyhear
t.The
onet
hatIpl
edgedi
nfr
ontofGodand
magi
str
atet
hatIwi
l
lst
ickbyhi
mfor
bet
terf
orwor
se.Howdi
dwegether
e
wi
thi
naper
iodoft
woy
ear
s?Whati
sit
t
hatI
’
m notdoi
ngr
ightt
osuf
ferl
i
ket
his.
Imi
ssmyhusband,
theonet
hatIf
ell
in
l
ovewi
th.Imi
ssal
lthegoodt
imeswe
hadt
oget
her
.Hi
sscentsnapsmeoutof
myt
rance.
“
Don’
tcr
y,i
t’
sgoi
ngt
obeokayf
orr
eal
t
hist
ime”Hest
opsmyt
earf
rom r
oll
i
ng
wi
thhi
sthumbandenv
elopesmei
nhi
s
ar
ms.I
t’
sfunnyt
hatIf
eel
saf
eand
pr
otect
edi
nhi
sar
ms,
thesamear
ms
t
hatbeatmeup.If
reemy
sel
ffr
om hi
s
ar
msandgot
ocal
lMi
ra.If
indheron
t
hephoneandt
hewayshe’
sbeami
ng
andbl
ushi
ngIj
ustknewshe’
stal
ki
ngt
o
t
her
udeboy
.Ist
andbyt
hedoorand
l
ookather
.I’
m happyt
hatshe’
sdat
ing
butI
’
m al
soscar
edf
orher
.It
’shi
ght
ime
Imeett
hisboyandobser
vehi
m.
“
Mir
acl
e”sher
emov
est
hephonef
rom
herandl
ooksmydi
rect
ion,
shehasv
ery
shar
pear
s.Iwon’
tli
etoy
ousomet
imes
Iwi
shmi
racl
escanhappenagai
nand
shewakeupwi
thsi
ght
.Si
gh.
“
Dinneri
sready
,come”
“
Okay
….by
eIwi
l
lseey
out
omor
row”she
say
sthel
astsent
enceont
hephoneand
hangsup.Sher
oll
outofbedandt
ake
muf
fi
nthenweheadt
othedi
ningar
ea.
“
Dinneri
sser
vedcomesi
tdownmy
Queen”Hepul
l
soutt
hechai
rformeand
Isi
tdownt
henhepushesi
tabi
t
“
Mypr
incessher
eisy
ourseat
”Hehel
ps
Mi
rasi
tsdownanddi
shesupf
orher
.
“
Her
eyougo”
“
ThanksDad”say
sMi
ra,
myhusband
smi
l
esandsi
tonhi
schai
r.Hedi
shup
f
orbot
hofusandweeatov
era
conv
ersat
ionandabi
tofl
aught
er.Mi
ra
i
sal
i
ghteat
erwhenshe’
sdoneshe
say
shergoodni
ghtandwal
ksout
.I
col
l
ectt
hedi
shes,
oncewear
edone
eat
ingandwewasht
hem t
oget
her
,
pl
ayi
ngwi
thwat
eri
nbet
weenl
i
kewe
ar
eki
ds.
“
HaenamaanKhumal
o!”Hel
aughsand
spl
ashesi
tonmyf
aceIgaspandpoura
col
dbowl
ofwat
eronhi
m.
“
YoooMaKhumal
o”Hegr
oansandI
gi
ggl
e
“
Iwi
l
lgety
ouf
ort
his,
uzobona”Il
augh
athi
m,wef
ini
shwashi
ngt
hedi
shes.
“
Thanks”Isayl
ooki
ngathi
m
“
Youdon’
thav
eto.I
’
mleav
ingIwi
l
l
f
etchy
ouat9am f
ormynex
t
appoi
ntment
”Ismi
l
efai
ntl
yandnod.He
ki
ssesmyl
i
ps
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Il
ookathi
m unt
ilhe’
s
outofsi
ghtandsi
ghheav
il
y.Ohl
ordcan
y
oumaket
hiswor
kthi
sti
me,
please.

Wecannev
ert
rul
yunder
standunt
ilwe
wal
kami
l
einsomeone’
sshoes.Iwas
abr
asi
veandj
udgment
alt
owar
dsmama
onl
ytof
indoutsheknewt
hati
tcoul
d
nev
erbeeasyt
oleav
eKhumal
o.Idon’
t
under
standwhypeopl
ewhower
e
abusedt
endt
obeabusi
vet
oo.Ar
en’
t
t
heysupposedt
obet
heonewhoshoul
d
l
oveandpr
otectt
hei
rlov
edones
becauset
heyknowbet
ter
?Doest
his
meanIwi
l
lal
sobeabusi
vewhenI
’
m
ol
der
?I’
mver
yper
tur
bedaboutt
he
si
tuat
ionathand.Iwi
shIcanwakeup
al
loft
hist
urnoutt
obeahor
ri
ble
ni
ght
mar
e.I
tseemsl
i
kei
t’
sescal
ati
ng
eachday
,todayIal
mostdi
ed.OhLor
dI
waspet
ri
fi
ed,
Ithoughtheki
l
ledmebut
apar
tofmef
eel
ssor
ryf
orhi
m.Ican
onl
yimagi
nehowi
twasf
orhi
m butmy
pr
obl
em whyi
nfl
i
ctt
hesamepai
nto
y
ourl
oveones.

I
t’
scl
earnowt
hatwear
enotgoi
ngt
o
getoutoft
hisdar
khol
enotunl
essIt
ell
cuddl
ecakest
ogoonwi
thapl
anof
t
aki
ngdownmyst
epdad.Hehasbeen
beggi
ngmei
nthesepastf
ewday
stogo
onwi
thapl
anbutIdi
dn’
twantt
oget
i
nvol
vedany
mor
e.Iwi
l
ltel
lhi
m
t
omor
rowt
hatI
’
m onboar
dagai
nandI
knowt
hathewi
l
lbehappy
.Thet
hought
ofhi
m makesmesmi
l
e.GoshIdon’
t
knowwhatt
hatNkosi
boyi
sdoi
ngt
ome
butal
lIknowi
sIl
i
keev
erybi
tofi
t.He
makesmef
eel
for
eignt
hings,
howcanI
notment
ionhappy
.Hemakesmehappy
wi
thoutev
ent
ryi
ng.Hi
spr
esencei
nmy
l
i
fei
sabl
essi
ng,
hishugsar
emy
f
avour
it
eandhi
ski
ssesar
emyaddi
cti
ve
dr
ug,
mydai
l
ydose,
Ican’
tseem t
o
f
unct
ionwi
thoutt
hem.I
t’
sonl
ybeena
f
ewhour
sbutImi
sshi
m al
readywi
th
hi
sannoy
ingl
aught
er.

I
’
m ont
hephonet
alki
ngt
oGuguabout
mycuddl
ecakes.
“
Yoohbabest
heguyi
sal
way
sonmy
mi
nd24/
7Ican’
tspendadaywi
thout
seei
nghi
m.Todaywewer
esupposedt
o
bet
oget
herbutwecoul
dn’
tandnowI
f
eel
li
kef
lyi
ngt
ohi
m”
“
OMGbi
tchy
ouar
einl
ove!
”Wegi
ggl
e
“
Ist
hishowl
ovef
eel
sli
ke”Iask
“
Yesmyl
ove”
“
It
’sagoodbutscar
yfeel
i
ng”
“
IknowI
’
m sohappyf
ory
oubabes.
Chi
l
lysaucey
odwa!
”real
i
tyhi
tmehar
d
“
Thankschommi
e”Isaywi
thal
ow
v
oice
“
Yousounddownnow,
what
’sup”
“
Whati
fgi
rl
stakehi
m awayf
rom me
Gugu”
“
Hewoul
donl
ybet
akeni
fhewant
sto
bel
olo”Okaynowt
hatwor
ri
esmeev
en
mor
e.Whydi
dhechoosemeoutofal
l
t
hegi
rl
sint
hiswor
ld?If
eel
li
kehe
deser
vemor
ethanj
ustabl
i
ndgi
rl
“
Ihat
eitwheny
ouar
equi
etbecausei
t
meansy
ouar
ethi
nki
ngal
lthenegat
ivi
ty
st
uff
.Thatboyl
ovesy
ousol
oveshi
m
back”shesay
s
“
OkayIheary
ou”Iheart
hedooropeni
ng
“
Mom?
”
“
Yeahbabyi
t’
sme”
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?It
houghty
ou
ar
esl
eepi
ng”
“
Hai
bodi
dn’
tIsayI
’
m sl
eepi
ngwi
thy
ou
f
rom t
oday
”
“
Ohy
es.
..
lookIhav
etogot
alk
t
omor
row”
“
Okaysendmyr
egar
dtoy
ourmom”
“
Iwi
l
l”Ihangup
“
Gugusendsherr
egar
d”
“
That
’ssosweetofher
”shesay
sget
ti
ng
nex
ttomeandcuddl
esme.Idon’
tknow
whenIf
ell
asl
eepandsur
pri
singl
yI
di
dn’
thav
eanyni
ght
mar
es.I
t’
sthenex
t
mor
ningandmom hasl
eftwi
thdadf
or
t
her
apysoIf
reshenupandhav
emy
br
eakf
ast
.Iwai
tformycuddl
escakest
o
comeandf
etchme.Mi
nut
esl
aterhe
cal
l
sme,
tel
l
ingmet
hathe’
sout
side.I
t
akemuf
fi
n,myphoneandmakemy
wayoutaf
tercl
osi
ngt
hedoor
.
“
MyDol
l
face”HehugsmeandIsi
nki
n
hi
sar
ms,
inhal
i
nghi
sscentunt
ilal
i
ttl
e
v
oicedi
stur
bus
“
Mir
ahey
!!
”Cuddl
ecakesgr
oans
“
Isai
dst
ayi
nthecarSnot
hando,
you
don’
tli
sten!
”Doesl
i
ttl
eonel
i
sten,
no
she’
shuggi
ngmywai
st.
“
HeyBabyGi
rl
,howar
eyou”
“
I’
m sohappyt
oseey
ouMi
ra”shesay
s
sosweet
lyandIsmi
l
e
“
I’
m sohappyt
oseey
out
oobabygi
rl
”
“
Seemehow,
youcan’
tseemos”Il
augh,
she’
ssmar
tbutt
hiswor
disoneoft
he
wor
dsweusei
nourev
ery
dayl
i
fe.Just
becauseI
’
m bl
i
nddoesn’
tmeanIcan’
t
uset
hewor
dseeorl
ook.Mysenseof
seei
ngandl
ooki
ngar
etouchi
ngand
f
eel
i
ng.Youdon’
thav
etochoosewor
ds
t
ousewheny
ouar
ewhenwi
thme
t
hinki
ngt
heymi
ghtof
fendme.Tr
eatme
nor
mal
li
keanyot
hersi
ght
edpeopl
e.
“
YesIdon’
tseebutt
hatdoesn’
tmeanI
can’
tsensey
ouandf
eel
you”
“
Ohokay
”
“
Geti
nthecarmunchki
n”say
sLwenkosi
“
Arewegoi
ngwi
thMi
raLwandl
e?”
“
Isai
dgeti
nthecar
!!
”
“
Stopshout
ingt
hepoorki
dcuddl
e
cakes”
“
Thanky
ouMi
ra,
shout
ingwi
l
lmakey
ou
ugl
yli
kegr
andma”Lwenkosi
andIl
augh
t
hengeti
nthecar
.
“
Iknowt
hatIpr
omi
sedy
ousomet
ime
j
ustt
het
woofusbutI
’
m baby
sit
ti
ng
t
oday
”
“
Nopr
obl
em,
wewi
l
lbaby
sitt
oget
her
“
“
You’
resuchasweetangel
yaz
”He
ki
ssesmycheekandst
art
sthecar
.
We’
resi
ngi
ngal
ongt
othemusi
cont
he
way
,Snot
handoi
sscr
eami
ngherl
ungs,
Lwenkosi
andIl
augh.Shesi
ngsok,
it’
s
j
ustt
hatuf
unakuz
wakel
eyenay
edwa
l
ol.Wear
ri
veatLwenkosi
’
spl
aceandI
makemy
sel
fcomf
ort
abl
e.Atl
east
t
her
e’snooneex
ceptus.
“
Doy
ouwantsomet
hingt
oeatbabe”
askLwenkosi
“
NoI
’
mful
lbaby
”
“
Munchki
ngoandt
akey
ournewdol
lso
t
hatshecanmeetMi
ra”
“
Okay
!”
“
Aguycan’
tev
enki
sshi
sgi
rlnangu
uSnot
handoay
,”Igi
ggl
eandheshutme
upwi
thaki
ssandhol
dmecl
oset
o
hi
msel
f.Iwi
shhecannev
erst
opt
his
f
eel
ssogoodbutwear
ebaby
sit
ti
ngso
west
opbef
oret
hel
i
ttl
egi
rlmakeher
wayi
n.
“
‘Mi
rameetmydol
l
”shegi
vesmeher
dol
landIt
ouchandf
eel
it.
“
Heymunchi
e,what
’shername”
“
InamedherMi
ra,
she’
sbeaut
if
ull
i
ke
y
ouandmybr
othercal
l
syouDol
l
face”I
gi
ggl
e
“
Youar
esosweetmunchki
n”wespend
t
hedaywat
chi
ngNet
fl
ixsi
ncei
thas
audi
odescr
ipt
ionaf
tert
hatwel
i
stent
o
Snor
eadi
ngherbook,
mimi
cki
ngev
ery
v
oice,
she’
sgoodI
’
mtel
l
ingy
ou.
Lwenkosi
order
spi
zzaandweeatt
hen
got
othepool
.
“
ComeMi
ra!
”
“
NoI
’
mfi
neSno,
Iwi
l
lsi
ther
eandy
ou
guy
scangoswi
m”Thi
schi
l
ddoesn’
t
t
akenof
orananswer
.Idon’
tknowhow
t
oswi
m,Ican’
taf
for
dtodr
own.
“
Igoty
oubabyy
ouwon’
tdr
ownwhi
l
e
I
’
m her
e”
“
Whosai
dIcan’
tswi
m”
“
Thencomepl
ease”hebegsmaki
ngi
t
har
dformet
oref
usesoIt
akeof
fmy
cl
othesandl
eav
esmyunder
gar
ment
s.
Lwenkosi
hol
dsmyhandashegui
deme
i
nthewat
er.
“
Igoty
ouokay
”It
rusthi
m soIr
elaxand
hav
efununt
ili
tst
art
sget
ti
ngcol
d,we
getoutofwat
erandmakeourwayi
n
t
hehouse.
“
Thet
owel
sar
eont
hebedbabe,
I’
ll
be
backj
ustnow”I
’
minhi
sbedr
oom now
soIt
akeof
fmywetunder
gar
ment
sand
wr
apat
owel
onmybody
,he’
sback
secondsl
ater
“
She’
sfastasl
eepnow,
atl
ast
.Wat
er
doest
hatt
oher
”Ichuckl
e
“
Ilov
eher
,she’
ssoador
abl
e”
“
Hay
,Hay
,I’
m notshar
ingy
ount
ombi
”I
l
augh
“
Ohcomeon,
don’
ttel
lmey
ou’
re
j
eal
ous”
Thebedcr
ingesasi
taccommodat
es
hi
m nex
ttome
“
Todaywassupposedt
obeabouty
ou
andmebabebuty
ouwer
egi
vi
nghert
oo
muchofy
ourat
tent
ionandt
hatbookof
her
syoooh,
itwasbor
ing”Igi
ggl
e
“
Comeonbabe,
don’
tbel
i
ket
hat
.She’
s
j
ustaki
dandsheneedat
tent
ion”
“
Aynotwhent
hatat
tent
ioni
ssupposed
t
obeshownt
ome.
”Il
aughehmadoda
he’
sreal
l
yser
iousmos.Il
ovespendi
ng
t
imewi
thmunchki
n,herper
sonal
i
tyi
s
r
efr
eshi
ng.
“
Don’
tlaugh,
uyangi
kwat
isa”
“
OkayI
’
m sor
ry”
“
Sor
ry?Justsor
ry?
”
“
Sor
rymycuddl
ecakes”
“
Danki
emabhebez
aiz
angi
munce
amanz
ie-
orange”(
Thanksbabel
etme
ki
ssy
ou)Hecapt
uresmyl
i
psi
nasul
tr
y
ki
ssandIf
eel
hiswei
ghtont
opofme
ashei
ntenf
ytheki
ss.Hi
sbr
eat
hwar
ms
myski
nashi
sli
psmov
est
omyneck,
ni
bbl
i
ngandsucki
ng.
“
Lwenkosi
”
“
Doy
out
rustme?
”
“
YesIdo”Hecont
inueski
ssi
ngme,
I
f
eel
hishandsunwr
appi
ngmyt
owel
“
Lwe…”
“
ShhhI
’
m notgoi
ngt
ohur
tyouj
ustt
rust
me….
ohdamny
ouev
enpr
ett
ierwi
thout
cl
othes”
Hef
ondl
esmybr
east
,awi
nceof
pl
easur
eescapemyl
i
psasIf
eel
the
war
mthofhi
smout
hinmyni
ppl
e
suckl
i
ngandl
i
cki
ng
“
shhhl
l
ll
ll
l
llLwenkosi
”ohwhati
sthi
s
boydoi
ngt
omemybodyf
eel
ssof
unny
y
etI
t’
sex
hil
arat
ing.Het
rai
lki
sses
goi
ngdownt
omyst
omachandspr
ead
myl
egsapar
t.If
eel
hisf
inger
srubbi
ng
agai
nstt
hei
nsi
deofmyt
highsunt
ilt
hey
metmysl
i
t.
“
Youar
ewetbabyohIl
i
kei
t”Henuz
zles
hi
sheadonmymuf
f,sni
ff
ing
“
Yousmel
lsogood”Il
osecont
rol
ofmy
senseswhenIf
eel
hist
onguest
roki
ng
myv
agi
na.
“
Lwenkosi
whatar
eyoudoi
ngt
ome
y
oooo”Idon’
tknowwhatt
odowi
th
my
sel
f,Icl
enchont
hebl
anket
s.Hi
s
st
rokesar
equi
ckanddeeperohgoodI
canf
eel
itbui
l
dingupandup,
myf
eet
f
eel
shotandt
ingl
y.OhhhhnoooIwant
t
opeebuti
tdoesn’
tfeel
li
ket
heusual
ur
get
opee,
Itf
eel
sli
keasneez
ebuton
t
hel
owerbody
.It
ryt
ocl
ampmyl
egs
cl
osedbuthehol
dsmei
npl
ace
“
Iwantt
opeeLwenkosi
i
ii
i”
“
Leti
toutbaby
”
“
Noooo!Ar
eyoucr
azz
zzyaweee
mal
ooooo”Mywhol
ebodyconv
ulseas
awav
esat
urat
esmyv
agi
naohno!
“
OMGI
’
m sor
rybutIt
oldy
ouIwantt
o
peebuty
oucoul
dn’
tletme.Iwi
l
lwash
y
ourcov
ers,
Ohl
ordt
hisembar
rassi
ng.I
swearIhav
enev
erpeeonmy
sel
f.I
t’
s
myf
ir
st…angi
zi
chamel
ist
rugody
oucan
askmymom I
..
..
”I’
m speaki
ngsof
ast
wi
tht
ear
sinmyey
es
“
Hayhey
,Mi
racal
m down”Hesay
sas
hecr
awl
sont
opme
“
Youdi
dn’
tpeeony
our
sel
fbuty
ouwer
e
r
eachi
nganor
gasm”
“
Huh”
“
Orgasm i
sthesuddendi
schar
geof
accumul
atedsex
ual
exci
tementdur
ing
t
hesex
ual
responsecy
cle,
resul
ti
ngi
n
r
hyt
hmi
cmuscul
arcont
ract
ionsi
nthe
pel
vi
cregi
onchar
act
eri
zedbysex
ual
pl
easur
e.”
“
Ohy
eah”Hegi
ggl
esandki
ssesmyl
i
ps
het
ast
eabi
tofsal
ty
“
Ican’
tbel
i
eveIj
ustl
ostmyv
irgi
nit
ybut
i
twasni
cet
hough”Igi
ggl
e.
“
Nobaby
,youdi
dn’
tlosey
ourv
irgi
nit
y
t
hiswasor
alsexnotv
agi
nal
sexy
ouar
e
st
il
lav
irgi
n”Hel
etouthi
sannoy
ing
l
augh.
“
mxm sukaphekwami
!
”(Getof
fme!
!)
“
Goshy
ouar
esocl
uel
essbuti
t’
scut
e”
Hesay
slaughi
nghi
sski
nnyassof
f!
Mx
m!

.
300comment
s1kl
i
kes
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayBaf
anaBaf
ana

CHAPTER12

I
’
m si
tt
ingher
eobser
vingt
hisl
ady
bef
oreusasshe’
sbusyaski
ng
quest
ionsandt
aki
ngnot
esofwhat
ever
myhusbandsay
s.Ican’
thel
pbutnot
ice
somet
hingdi
sconcer
ti
ngaboutheror
may
beIj
ustdon’
ttr
usthert
odot
his.
Ther
e’sabsol
utel
ynot
hingbot
her
some
wi
thher
,may
beshe’
stooy
oungf
orme
butheyIhav
eadaught
erandshe’
s
al
mostol
denought
obeherageI
’
dhat
e
i
tifsomeonewer
etounder
minemy
daught
er’
scapabi
l
iti
es.Letmej
ustr
elax
andwat
chhowt
hisgoes.

“
Howol
dar
eyou?
”Ohy
ouhav
enoi
dea
howl
ongIhav
ebeenhol
dingmy
sel
fto
askt
hatquest
ion.IguessIcoul
dn’
thel
p
my
sel
f.Shel
ookst
akenbyt
hatbutI
l
ookatherst
rai
ghti
nherey
es.
“
I’
m 26y
ear
sol
d”
“
Real
l
y?”Ican’
thi
det
heshocki
nmy
v
oiceandshenot
ice
“
YesMr
sKhumal
o”
“
Youl
ooksoy
ounghey
”shesmi
l
es,
I’
m
notsur
eifi
t’
sfakeorgenui
ne.
“
Igett
hatal
ot”
“
I’
m sor
ryt
obeoutoft
hecont
ent
,I’
m
j
usti
mpr
essedbyt
hewayy
oudoy
our
j
ob”Il
i
ethr
oughmygr
it
tedt
eet
h.
“
Thanky
ouMr
sKhumal
o..
.MrKhumal
o
y
oument
iont
haty
ouar
eangr
ywhy
”
“
YesI
’
m angr
yatmyf
atherf
orabusi
ng
us,
I’
m angr
yatmymot
herf
orst
ayi
ng
wi
thmyf
atherev
enaf
terhet
reat
edher
l
i
keapunchi
ngbag.I
’
m angr
yatmy
si
ster
sforl
eav
ingmei
nthathel
lhol
e.
I
’
m angr
yatmyexwi
fef
ort
hebi
tchshe
was.
”
shewr
it
essomet
hingonhernot
epad
t
henl
ooksatme
“
MrsKhumal
oforhowl
onghasy
our
husbandbeenbeat
ingy
ou?
”Icl
earmy
t
hroatandl
ookatmyhusbandashe
shi
ft
suncomf
ort
abl
yont
hecoucht
hen
l
ookatMi
ssGama
“
Uhm t
woy
ear
s”Iseeahi
ntofpi
ty
f
lashesacr
ossherey
es.
“
Whatabouty
ourwi
feMrKhumal
o?
Ai
n’
tyouangr
yatherf
orst
ayi
ngwi
th
y
ouaf
tert
woy
ear
sint
hisabusi
ve
mar
ri
age?
”Il
ookathi
m andhi
sfaci
al
ex
pressi
onchangeswi
thi
namat
terof
seconds.Hecl
encheshi
sjawt
ight
ly
“
IfIwasangr
yather
,don’
tyout
hinkI
woul
dhav
ement
iont
hat
?”Myhusband
canber
udet
haty
ouwi
sht
hegr
ound
canopenupandswal
l
owy
ou.
“
MrKhumal
oinor
derf
orust
ogett
othe
bot
tom oft
his,
wehav
eto…”her
udel
y
i
nter
rupt
sher
.
“
Let
’spr
oceedt
othenex
tquest
ion
pl
ease”Shesi
ghsandwr
it
esomet
hing
downagai
n.
“
Yourexwi
fe,
didy
oubeatherupt
oo?
”
“
Um y
es”
“
Why
?”
“
Thatbi
tchdeser
vedi
t,shewast
wo
t
imi
ngme!
”
“
Andy
ourwi
feher
e?I
sshet
wot
imi
ng
y
ou?
”
“
Don’
tyoudar
ecompar
eBongawi
th
t
hatsl
ut!YouknowwhatI
’
m donef
or
t
heday
!!
”Heget
supandl
eav
esme
si
tt
ingt
her
efeel
i
ngnumbaboutt
his
whol
esessi
on.
“
LookIdon’
tmeant
obef
orwar
dbut
cany
oudot
his?
”
“
MrsKhumal
owhaty
ouhav
etoknowi
s
t
hatI
’
mjustapsy
chol
ogi
stwhohel
ps
peopl
ewhoar
ewi
l
li
ngt
obehel
pedand
change.Theot
hert
hingi
syoucan’
tsee
changeov
erni
ght
,itt
akesdedi
cat
ion
andcommi
tmentf
rom bot
hpar
ti
es.
Yourhusbandhasi
ssuest
hatwehav
e
t
oanal
yzest
epbyst
epunt
ilheadmi
t
f
ull
ytowhathehasdone,
stopex
cuses,
acceptr
esponsi
bil
i
tyandr
ecogni
zet
hat
abusei
sachoi
ce”
“
Buthe’
sagoodman”
“
Iwon’
tdenyt
hatMr
sKhumal
o,noone
wakesupandbecomeanabuser
.Your
husbandwasabusedwhenhe’
swas
y
oungandal
sowi
tnesseddomest
ic
v
iol
entwhi
chi
sar
esul
tofhi
sbehav
ior
.”
Shesay
s
“
Iunder
standbutsomet
imesi
t’
sbaf
fl
es
me,
youknow.Imeanwhypeopl
ewho
wer
eabusedt
endt
obeabusi
ve?It
hink
asf
ort
hem t
heyshoul
dknowbet
ter
don’
tyout
hink?
”
“
Arel
ati
onshi
pbet
weenpsy
chol
ogi
cal
di
str
essandv
iol
encei
sthatment
al
heal
thpr
obl
emscausedi
ff
icul
ti
eswi
th
emot
ionr
egul
ati
onandpeopl
emayuse
v
iol
enceasawayt
ocopewi
tht
hei
r
pai
nful
emot
ions.Themostcommon
emot
ionex
pressedbyabusi
vepeopl
eis
anger
.Angeri
sal
mostal
way
sa
secondar
yemot
ion,
meani
ngt
hatt
her
e
i
sal
soamor
epr
imar
yfeel
i
ngbeneat
hit
l
i
kef
ear
,hur
t,sadnessorshame.Thi
sis
acr
it
ical
dist
inct
ionbecausewhatwe
t
ell
our
sel
vesabouthowwef
eel
inf
orms
behav
ior
.IfIt
ell
mysel
fthatI
’
m pi
ssed,
t
hanI
’
m goi
ngt
oactpi
ssed.Angerf
eel
s
bet
tert
hanhur
torembar
rassmentbuti
t
al
soset
susupt
opuni
sht
heot
her
per
son.
”
“
Iguessi
tdi
ff
erswi
thpeopl
e.If
orone
nev
erhadgr
eatchi
l
dhoodmyf
atheruse
t
obeatmeupasr
esul
toft
hatIbecame
st
ubbor
nandr
ebel
l
iousbutt
hedayI
gav
ebi
rt
hIv
owedt
omy
sel
fthatIwoul
d
nev
erl
aymyhandonmydaught
er.Ist
il
l
f
eel
badt
hataweekagoIsl
appedher
”
“
Yespeopl
ehandl
etr
auma,
pai
n,et
c
di
ff
erent
ly.Wear
epeopl
eandwewi
l
l
al
way
smakemi
stakesandl
ear
nfr
om
t
hem.Asl
ongasy
ouandy
ourdaught
er
ar
efi
ney
oushoul
dn’
twor
ryy
our
sel
f
aboutsomet
hingt
haty
oucan’
tchange.
Vi
olencehav
ebey
ondphy
sical
eff
ect
s,i
t
goesbey
ondt
hepai
nint
hebr
uisesor
woundedf
ace.Ther
ear
eal
so
psy
chol
ogi
cal
eff
ect
s.Yougoi
ngt
o
needcounsel
i
ngt
ooMr
sKhumal
o.What
y
ouar
egoi
ngt
hroughi
sbey
ondonecan
i
magi
ne.
”
“
I’
mfi
ne,
Ireal
l
yam”Il
i
e,IknowI
'
m
sl
owl
ydy
ingi
nsi
debyeachpassi
ngday
buthopi
ngf
ort
hebet
teri
swhatkeeps
megoi
ngev
ery
dayhenceher
eIam
suppor
ti
ngmyhusbandt
hrought
he
counsel
i
ng.
“
Youmaynotseet
heneednowbutt
rust
mey
oudoneedt
hesesessi
onsas
muchasy
ourhusband.Ibel
i
evey
ou
wantt
ofi
xyourmar
ri
ageandmakei
t
whol
eagai
nsoy
oucan’
tsuppor
tyour
husbandt
odeal
wit
hhi
sissueswhi
l
e
y
ouar
eal
sohar
bor
ingsomepai
n,y
ou
al
soneedt
ofacewhaty
ouar
egoi
ng
t
hroughandheal
”Ibl
i
nkbackmyt
ear
s
andsmi
l
efai
ntl
y.
“
Thanky
ouf
ort
heof
ferbutI
’
mfi
ne”I
getup
“
Hav
eagooddayMi
ssGama”Imake
mywayoutandf
indt
hehusband
wai
ti
ngf
orme.Ij
umpi
ntot
hecarand
cl
oset
hedoor
.
“
Yini
manj
eint
oosuy
ikhami
sel
elapha?
”
“
I’
m sor
ry”Idon’
twantt
omakehi
m
angr
y.I
’
mtr
yingmyut
mostt
okeept
he
sweetKhumal
oforasl
ongasi
tpossi
ble,
al
thoughi
t’
sami
ssi
onsomet
imes.
“
YouknowIhav
eameet
ingnow,
I’
m
r
unni
ngl
ate!
”Ifi
twoul
dhav
ebeenot
her
day
s,Iwoul
dhav
ejumpupwi
thf
ri
ghtat
hi
syel
l
ingscar
yvoi
cebutnowI
’
m use
t
othi
s.
“
Ngi
yax
oli
sa”(
I’
m sor
ry)Hest
art
sthe
caranddr
ivesof
f
“
Pleasedr
opmeatt
hephar
macy
,Iwi
l
l
t
akeacabhome”Hel
ooksatme
si
deway
sbutIdon’
tlookathi
m
“
Arey
ousi
ck?
”
“
Justheadache,
that
’sal
l
”Hesay
s
not
hingandt
her
estoft
hedr
ivei
squi
et.
Oncewegett
her
eIbuyt
hemor
ning
af
terandheadachet
abl
ets.Justt
hen
myphoner
ings.Ibr
owset
hroughmy
handbagunt
ilIf
indi
tthenansweri
tasI
makemywayoutaf
terpay
ingf
ormy
pi
l
ls.
“
Hel
l
o”
“
HeyNoku”Lor
dcant
hisdaygetany
bet
ter
!
“
Whatdoy
ouwantSkhal
oandwher
e
t
hef
uckdi
dyougetmynumber
!”
“
Isawourdaught
erwi
th…”myhear
t
ski
psabeat
“
Ify
oudar
etouchmydaught
er,
Iwi
l
lki
l
l
y
ouwi
thmybar
ehandsSkhal
o!!
”
“
Chi
l
lIwi
l
lnev
erhur
tourdaught
er,
she’
s
beaut
if
ull
i
key
ouev
ent
houghshel
ooks
mor
eli
key
ourf
ather
”
“
Heywenat
hat
’snoty
ourdaught
er!Igot
r
idofy
our
sisn’
tthatwhaty
ouwant
ed
sost
ayt
hehel
lawayf
rom usbef
oreI
t
ell
myhusbanddeal
wit
hyou!
!”Ihang
upandgr
oanf
rust
rat
edl
y.Thi
smani
s
t
est
ingme!
“
Isev
ery
thi
ngokay
”asksmyhusband
“
Yesev
ery
thi
ngi
sfi
nebaby
”If
akea
smi
l
e
“
Ical
l
edSoxt
ocomeandt
akey
ouhome.
Nowi
feofmi
newi
l
lusecabs.
”
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Ilov
eyouMaKhumal
o”
“
Ilov
eyout
ooKhumal
o”Heki
ssesme
“
CanIsl
eepi
nthehouset
oni
ghtImi
ss
y
ou”
“
ButI
’
m al
way
sher
ewi
thy
ou”
“
Ican’
tsl
eepwi
thouty
ouBongat
hose
hot
elsheet
sar
esocol
d”i
t’
snotl
i
kei
t
makeadi
ff
erencet
hathe’
snotl
i
ving
wi
thusbecausehei
sal
way
swi
thus.
“
Mightaswel
lcomebackhome”He
smi
l
esohl
ord!Somet
hingy
ouhav
eto
knowaboutKhumal
o’ssmi
l
eist
hati
t
makesone’
schestf
lut
terandy
ou
al
mostf
orgett
obr
eat
he.
“
Thanky
ousomuchf
orev
ery
thi
ng
st
handwasami
,Iknowi
t'
snoteasyf
or
y
oubuty
ouar
est
il
lwi
thmeandf
ort
hat
Iwi
l
lal
way
slov
eyouBonga”Hepl
ant
sa
peckonmyf
orehead
“
Goy
ouar
eal
readyl
ate”Heget
sinhi
s
caranddr
ivesof
fswi
ft
lyaf
terhoot
ing
once.Iwai
tforSoxasIdr
if
tfaraway
wi
tht
hought
s.Di
dher
eal
l
yki
l
lhi
sex
wi
fe?Hedoesn’
tseem r
emor
sef
ulf
or
beat
inghi
sexwi
fe,
Iwonderwhat
happened?Howl
ongar
ewegoi
ngt
ogo
t
hrought
his?Am Iev
enmaki
ngt
her
ight
deci
sionbybr
ingi
nghi
m backhomebut
i
t’
snotl
i
kei
tmakesanydi
ff
erencehe
canf
indmewher
everIam.At
aponmy
shoul
derst
art
leme
“
I’
m sor
ry,
Idi
dn’
tmeant
ost
art
ley
ou”
Say
sthi
stal
ll
ightski
nnedmanwi
th
bushyey
ebr
owsandni
cel
ytr
immed
bear
d.
“
It
’sokay
”Isayl
ooki
ngathi
m wi
th
ant
ici
pat
ionbuthesay
snot
hingf
ora
goodmi
nut
ejustogl
i
ngme
“
HowcanIhel
pyou”Iask
“
I’
m sor
ryy
ourbeaut
yisoutoft
his
wor
ldamancan’
thel
pbutst
are”
“
Thanky
ou”Ismi
l
efai
ntl
y
“
Youf
orgoty
ourchangeatt
he
phar
macysoIbr
oughti
ttoy
ou”
“
Oht
hanky
ou”Hehandsmemychange
“
I’
m Khuz
ani
Msi
mango”
“
Nok….
”Soxdi
stur
bsme
“
Hel
l
oMr
sKsor
ryt
omakey
ouwai
t”
“
Nopr
obl
em Sox
...
thanksKhuz
ani
bye”I
sayf
oll
owi
ngSoxaswewal
ktot
hecar
t
hatmyhusbandboughtf
orhi
mjustt
o
t
akeMi
rawher
evershewantt
ogo.
“
Youdi
dn’
ttel
lmey
ourname.
..
Canwe
hav
esomel
unchorbr
eakf
ast
somet
ime”Ishowhi
m myr
inghandand
hesmi
l
esf
aint
ly
“
Wecanbef
ri
ends”I
fyouhav
eadeat
h
wi
sh.
“
Idon’
tdomal
efr
iends”Soxopenst
he
carf
ormeandIgeti
nthenhecl
osesi
t
bef
orewal
ki
ngt
ohi
ssi
de.I
’
m goi
ng
t
hroughal
otr
ightnowt
hel
astt
hingI
needi
ssomeone’
sdeat
honmy
consci
ous.Khumal
oonceki
l
ledaman
f
orshowi
ngi
nter
esti
nme.Hebr
utal
l
y
ki
l
ledhi
minf
rontofme,
whenIt
hinkof
t
hatdaymywhol
ebodycr
ingeandhe
madei
tsur
ethatIgett
hemessagel
oud
andcl
ear
.Nott
hatIwantt
ocheaton
hi
m,Il
ovemyhusbandwi
thev
ery
thi
ng
t
hatIgot
,it
’sj
ustt
hatl
ovi
nghi
m comes
wi
tht
oomuchbaggage,
pai
nandt
ear
s.
I
’
mjustgr
atef
ult
hought
hathehas
nev
ercheat
edonme.
“
IsMi
rahome?
”
“
Ithi
nkherboy
fri
endf
etchedherby
now”
“
Mir
ahasaboy
fri
endnow?
”Ichuckl
e
“
YesSoxandheseemst
obeagood
guy
”
“
Awr
eal
l
y?”
“
Yes”
“
Soy
oul
i
kehi
mforher
?”
“
YesIt
hinkhe’
sgoodf
ormydaught
er”
“
Idon’
ttr
usthi
m!Whywoul
dhechoose
Mi
raoutofal
lthegi
rl
s?”
“
Whatar
etr
yingt
osaySoxmydaught
er
don’
tdeser
vet
obel
oved?
”
“
NoMr
sK,
I’
m sor
ryi
fIcameacr
ossas
of
fensi
ve”Ther
estoft
hedr
ivei
squi
et
unt
ilhedr
opsmeof
fathome.The
momentIgeti
n,Iki
ckof
fmyheel
sand
t
akebot
tl
edwat
erf
rom t
hef
ri
dge.I
opent
hepaperbagandt
aket
he
mor
ningaf
ter
.Apar
tofmedon’
twant
t
otakei
tbutIknowt
hatwear
enot
r
eadyf
orababy
.Toomuchi
sgoi
ngon
i
t’
sdr
aini
ngandsucki
ngoutev
eryspi
ri
t
wi
thi
nmysoul
.Idownt
hemor
ningaf
ter
anddr
inkwat
ert
hensi
tdownont
he
f
loorl
ett
ingouthear
twr
enchi
ngsobs.

-
Wear
etaughtaboutsex
,puber
tyand
whatnotatschool
butt
heynev
ergot
t
hatdeepandbesi
del
ear
ninganddoi
ng
somet
hingi
sdi
ff
erent
.Thi
ngsLwenkosi
di
dtomet
odaywassodamngood.He
t
ookmet
oourownpl
anet
,mi
racl
esea
wher
eonl
ymeandhi
m ex
ist
ed.The
t
hingst
hisboymakemef
eel
areoutof
t
hiswor
ld.I
’
mfal
l
ingdeepf
orhi
m each
passi
ngsecondandi
tfeel
ssogoody
et
soscar
y.Noonehasev
ert
oldmet
hat
f
all
i
ngi
nlov
efeel
sthi
sgoodohIf
eel
so
al
i
veman!
Lor
dknowshowmuchheannoy
sme
whenhel
aughsatmeandwhatannoy
s
memor
eishi
slaugh.Mycuddl
escakes
hasanannoy
ingl
aughandbuti
t’
scut
e
i
nast
rangeway
,ift
hatev
enmakes
sense.Wel
lev
ersi
nceImethi
m not
hing
makessenseex
cepthi
m.Iwi
shIcan
seehi
m,gett
hepi
ctur
eofhowhel
ooks
whenhel
aughs,
smi
l
es,
sad,
angr
y,r
ude,
f
li
rt
ing.

“
OhbabyI
m sor
rypl
easedon’
tcr
y,I
di
dn’
tmeant
ohur
tyou”Thewor
ryi
nhi
s
v
oicej
ustt
ell
sthather
eal
l
ycar
esabout
me.
“
Youdi
dn’
thur
tme”
“
Thenwhyar
eyoucr
yingmyDol
l
face”
“
Iwi
shIcoul
dseey
ouy
azwheny
ou
l
augh,
mad,
rudeandangr
y,al
li
nal
lI
wi
shIcanseet
hisper
sonIcal
lmy
cuddl
ecakesandf
all
i
ngf
orev
ery
day
”
“
Ahhhbabe”Hewhi
sper
s,Iguesshe
doesn’
tknowwhatt
osay
.Iwoul
dn’
t
knowwhatt
osayt
oo.If
eel
hisbody
t
rembl
i
ngunder
neat
hmeasI
’
m
snuggl
edonhi
sbar
echest
“
Lwenkosi
”Hedoesn’
tsayany
thi
ngIl
i
ft
upmyheadf
rom hi
schestandr
unmy
f
inger
ti
psonhi
sfaceandf
eel
li
qui
don
t
hesi
deofhi
sface
“
Heyar
eyoucr
ying”
“
NoI
'
m not
”Hebur
sti
ntoasob
“
HeyI
'
m sor
ry”Iwr
apmyar
msar
ound
hi
sski
nnybody
“
Shhhi
t’
sgoi
ngt
obeokaywhat
everi
t
i
s.”If
ightmyt
ear
sfr
om f
all
i
ng,
ithur
ts
t
oli
stent
ohi
m cr
y.Awhi
l
elat
erhe
cal
msdown.
“
Letmegetwat
erf
ory
out
odr
ink”I
knowi
t’
sgoi
ngt
obeami
ssi
onsi
nceI
’
m
notf
ami
l
iarwi
tht
hishousebuthehol
ds
mewhenIt
ryt
ogetup
“
Don’
tgo,
justst
aywi
thmepl
ease”He
whi
sper
sandIdoashesay
.
“
Doy
ouwantt
otal
kabouti
t?”
“
Lif
eisj
ustunf
airy
ouknowandpeopl
e
saywemust
n’tquest
ionGodbuti
fyou
askmet
hat
'sbul
l
shi
t.I
fwedon’
t
quest
ionGodwhoshoul
dwequest
ion,
i
sn’
thet
heonewhoshoul
dhav
e
answer
s?”
”
Itsuckshey
,buti
tiswhati
tis
st
handwasami
.Theysaywhatdoesn’
t
ki
l
lusmakesusst
ronger
”Her
eleasea
hugebr
eat
h
“
Mir
a”
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Ngi
yakut
handa”(
Ilov
eyou)Idi
dn’
t
ex
pectt
hat
,nott
hatIex
pect
edany
thi
ng.
IguessI
’
m st
unnedt
ohearhi
m say
ing
t
hisphel
ahehasnev
ersai
dany
thi
ng
about“
lov
e”bef
ore.
“
Iknowt
hati
tmaybet
oosoonbutwhat
I
’
mfeel
i
ngf
ory
oui
sdeepert
hanIhav
e
ev
err
eal
i
zed.Il
ovey
ousomuchMi
ra,
I
hav
enev
erf
eltcl
oset
oany
onel
i
ket
his.
Youknowev
ersi
ncemybr
otherpassed
on,
Ihav
enev
erf
eltt
hishappy
,youbr
ing
outt
hebesti
nmegi
rl
”Ican’
thel
pbut
smi
l
e,hebr
ingsoutt
hebesti
nmet
oo.
Ev
ersi
nceImethi
m If
eel
soal
i
veandI
l
ovehowIf
orgetaboutmymom and
dadwhenI
’
m wi
thhi
m.
“
Ihav
enocl
uewheni
tcomest
olov
e
andev
ery
thi
ngbutwhatIknowi
sthatI
l
ovey
out
ooLwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Oht
hanky
ousomuch,
youhav
eno
i
deahowmuchhear
ingy
ousaymeans
t
ome.Youdon’
tneedamanual
just
f
oll
owy
ourhear
tandi
twi
l
lgui
dey
ou”
“
Buty
ousai
dI’
m cl
uel
ess”Hel
aughs
“
Yesi
t’
scut
ebutdon’
twor
ryIgoty
ou
okay
”
“
Okay
..
.Ihav
edeci
dedt
hatweshoul
dgo
aheadwi
tht
aki
ngdownmyst
epf
ather
”
“
Bestdeci
sionev
er!Yourf
atheri
swi
se
henev
erget
shi
shandsdi
rt
yweneeda
pl
anbabybutdon’
twor
ry,
Iwi
l
ltal
kto
myuncl
e,hewi
l
lknowwhatt
odo”
“
Wehav
etobecar
eful
Lwenkosi
,that
mani
sdanger
ous.Hewi
l
lki
l
lmymom i
f
hef
indsoutaboutt
his”
“
Hewon’
tseeuscomi
ngbutwehav
eto
actf
ast
”myphoner
ingsLwenkosi
reach
ov
ert
otakei
tandgi
vesme
“
Hel
l
o”
“
Comebackhomenow,
Imi
ssy
ou”her
v
oicei
shoar
se,
she’
sbeencr
ying.Ihav
e
nodoubt
.
“
OkayMom,
I’
m comi
ng”Ihangup
“
It
’smom,
she’
sbeencr
yingIt
hinkdad
beatherupagai
n.Pl
easet
akemehome
now”
“
EishI
’
m sor
ryst
handwasami
butI
pr
omi
sey
ou,
Iwi
l
lgety
ououtt
hisokay
”
Isi
ghandnod
“
Babyt
omor
rowmyf
ri
endi
shav
inga
bi
rt
hdaypar
tydoy
out
hinky
ourmom
wi
l
lal
l
owy
out
ocomewi
thme?
”
“
Yesshewi
l
l”
“
Itst
art
sat6pm unt
il00:
00am,
sincei
t’
s
Sundaywehav
etopr
epar
eforschool
t
hef
oll
owi
ngday
”
“
Iwi
l
ltal
ktoherandl
ety
ouknow”We
getupandgetdr
essedaf
tert
hathe
dr
ivesmehome.
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”weki
sst
henIgetout
“
Mommy
!”Ishoutt
hemomentIgeti
n
“
Liv
ingr
oom!
”Sheshout
sbackandI
makemywayt
her
e
“
Awsabuy
i”
“
I’
m sor
ry”Isi
tnex
ttoher
“
Tel
lmeabouty
ourdaywi
tht
her
ude
boy
”
“
Mom hi
snamei
sLwa…”
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
Iknow”shegi
ggl
es
“
Itwasf
unwewer
ebaby
sit
ti
nghi
sli
tt
le
si
ster
.She’
ssoador
abl
emom.Il
ove
her
”
“
Iwantt
omeethi
m cal
lhi
m nowandt
ell
hi
m Iwantt
oseehi
mtomor
row”
“
Okay
”Ical
lhi
m andl
ethi
m know,
he
soundsner
vousandIt
ell
himt
ocal
m
downmom doesn’
tbi
te
“
Let
’sgocookdi
nnery
ourf
atheri
s
comi
ngbackhome”ohno!
“
Why
?”
“
Whatdoy
oumeanwhy
,thi
sishi
s
house”Isi
ghandsaynot
hing,
she
pr
omi
sedmet
hatshewi
l
lsl
eepwi
thme
f
rom y
est
erdaybutnowt
hatdadi
s
comi
ngbackt
hatwon’
thappen.Weget
upandheadt
otheki
tchent
opr
epar
e
f
orsupper
.
“
Mom Lwandl
elwenkosi
want
stogoout
wi
thmet
oaf
ri
end’
spar
tyt
omor
row”
“
That
’swonder
ful
butIhav
etomeethi
m
f
ir
st”
“
It
’l
lst
artatsi
xmamaandendat00:
00”
“
Yhobabyatni
ghtnoy
ouar
enotgoi
ng”
“
Butmom comeon,
youal
way
ssayI
musthav
efunl
i
keot
hert
eenager
s”
“
Ofcour
sehoneybutwoul
dyoucopei
n
acr
owdedpl
acet
haty
ouhav
enev
er
beenbef
ore”
“
Lwenkosi
gotme”
“
AyIdon’
tknow”
“
Pleasemommy
,hewi
l
lbr
ingmebacki
f
I
'
m notcopi
ng”
“
Okay
,Okayf
ine”Isqueal
inex
cit
ement
andhugher
“
Thanky
oumommy
,youar
ethebest
!”
“
Ihav
etot
alkt
oyourf
atherf
ir
stt
hough”
wecookt
oget
herandt
het
imewe
f
ini
shed,
dadar
ri
ves.At7pm wedi
shup
andeatov
eraconv
ersat
ion.

Thenex
tdayLwenkosi
arr
ivesandt
alk
t
oMama&DadbutI
’
m notpar
toft
he
conv
ersat
ionhowsad.Iwantt
ohear
whatar
etheyt
alki
ngabout
.Whent
hey
ar
edonehel
eav
eswi
thoutt
alki
ngt
ome
nowI
’
m wonder
ingwhat
’sgoi
ngonsoI
cal
lhi
m
“
Baby
”
“
Heyy
oul
eftwi
thoutsay
inggoodby
eto
me,
howdi
ditgo?
”
“
Yourpar
ent
sar
elov
elymyl
ove,
I'
ll
comepi
cky
ouupi
nhal
fanhour
,be
r
eadyneh”
“
Okay
”Ti
mef
li
esr
eal
l
yqui
ckl
yI’
m done
f
resheni
ngupandget
ti
ngdr
essnowI
’
m
wai
ti
ngf
orcuddl
ecakes.I
’
m abi
t
ner
vousIhav
enev
erbeent
oapar
ty
bef
ore,
exceptAuntNoma’
s8y
earol
d
boy
'spar
ty.Thi
sonei
sdi
ff
erenti
t’
swi
l
l
bepeopl
emyagehav
ingf
un.
“
Youl
ookner
vous”mom say
s
“
Idon’
tknowwhatr
eact
ionImi
ghtget
t
her
e”
“
Don’
tletany
onei
nti
midat
eyouorbul
l
y
y
oumybaby
”mom say
sbr
ushi
ngmy
cheeks.
“
YouknowIdon’
tli
ket
his,
buty
ourmom
mademer
eal
i
zet
haty
ouar
egr
owi
ng
baby
.Wecan’
tkeepy
ouunderour
wi
ngsf
orev
er.Youar
etur
ning19i
n
December
,youhav
etogooutt
her
eand
knowhowt
oli
vewi
thoutus.
”
“
Thanky
ouDaddy
”
“
Ifany
onemesseswi
thy
ou,
justcal
lme
r
ightaway
”Dadsay
s
“
Iwi
l
lDad”Lwenkosi
arr
ivesandgr
eet
.
“
Pleasebr
ingherbackat10pm boy
”
“
Mom t
hisi
snotwhatweagr
eedon”
“
It
’sei
thert
hatory
ounotgoi
ngMi
ra”
say
sdadst
ernl
y.Ihuf
f
“
Iwi
l
ldosi
r”
“
Hav
efun”mom say
ski
ssi
ngmy
f
oreheadt
henweheadout
.
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ulmyl
ove”
“
Thanky
ousomuch,
cuddl
ecakes”We
geti
nthecaranddr
iveof
fjustt
alki
ngi
n
gener
al.
“
Wear
eher
e“Hehel
pmeoutoft
hecar
andhol
dsmyhandwhi
l
etheot
heri
s
hol
dingmuf
fi
n.Themusi
cisl
oudandI
canhearbyt
hev
ibet
hati
t’
spacked.
“
Lwaboy
!”I
’
m hol
dingonhi
m Idon’
t
wanthi
mtol
etmego.
Heymanugr
and”
“
I’
mfi
nemyman.
..
wel
come”
“
HappyBi
rt
hday
”
“
Thanky
oumyman.
.who’
sthi
sbeaut
if
ul
l
ady
”
“
Thi
sisMi
ra,
Dol
l
facet
hisTsepot
he
bi
rt
hdayboy
”
“
Nicet
omeety
ouMi
ra”
“
Nicet
omeety
out
oo”
“
Comej
oinus”Wemakeourwayi
n,
j
udgi
ngbyt
hel
evel
ofnoi
se,
thi
smust
bewher
ethepar
tyi
s.Hei
ntr
oducesme
t
ohi
sfr
iends.
“
Gent
sthi
sMi
ra.
..
Dol
l
facet
hesear
emy
f
ri
ends,
Thabo,
Sxov
aandI
nnocent
”
Theyal
lgr
eetmeonebyone.Wesi
t
downandhepul
l
smeonhi
slapand
shar
ehi
sci
derwi
thme.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
eveoutofal
lgi
rl
syouhadt
o
chooseabl
i
ndgi
rlLwa”say
sinnocent
.
“
Voet
ekI
nno!
”
“
Nor
eal
bral
i
kehowcany
oudumpmy
si
sterf
ort
hisr
eal
l
y!”
“
Eyngi
zokukhahl
elay
ezwa!
!”
“
NxI
’
m goi
ngt
ogogetf
reshai
r”say
s
i
nnocent
.
“
Heydon’
tmi
ndhi
m okay
”.Cuddl
e
cakeswhi
sper
sinmyearandInod.I
’
m
enj
oyi
ngmy
sel
fandI
’
mti
spy
.Thi
sisa
gr
eatpar
ty,
Imustsay
.
“
Thegi
rl
sar
eher
e”say
sSx
ova
“
Hel
l
looooboy
sss”say
soneoft
hegi
rl
s
andt
heboy
sgr
eether
.
“
Ohwho’
sthepi
ki
nini
sit
ti
ngonmybest
f
ri
end’
sbae”
“
Kahl
eukuphaphaNel
l
ypi
ki
nini
isy
our
wetpussy
!”Theguy
sbur
sti
ntol
aught
er
“
HiLwandl
e”say
sanot
hergi
rl
“
HeyNandi
”
“
Canwet
alkpl
ease”askNandi
“
Nandi
…”
“
Please”Ihearhi
mrel
easi
ngasi
ghand
whi
speri
nmyear
“
I’
m comi
ngbackokay
”Inodandgetup
f
rom hi
mthensi
tonhi
spl
ace
“
Whatt
hehel
lgi
rldi
dyouj
ustal
l
owy
our
mant
ogot
otal
ktohi
sexhaaaaa
uz
ithembi
l
eneh!
”Say
sthel
oudgi
rl
,
Nel
l
yokayIwon’
tli
ethatst
ingsl
i
kehel
l
.
“
Mir
adoy
ouwantanyci
der
”asksTsepo
“
NoI
'
mfi
nenow,
thanky
ou”mymom
war
nedmeaboutt
aki
ngdr
inksf
rom
any
onet
hat
’swhyIshar
ewi
thmy
cuddl
escakes.
“
SoMi
rawhat
’sy
ourst
ory
”asksnel
l
y
“
Iai
n’
tgotone”Theyal
ll
aughmx
mI
hat
eitwhenpeopl
elaughatme,
Ifeel
l
i
keI
’
m dumb.Thegi
rlcont
inuesaski
ng
mequest
ions,
want
ingt
oknowabout
mebuthonest
lymymi
ndi
snother
ebut
onLwenkosi
whohasdi
sappear
edf
or
anhournowwi
thhi
sex
.
“
Cany
oupl
easeshowmet
het
oil
et”I
whi
spert
otheNel
l
ybutshegi
vesme
di
rect
ion.
“
Gowi
thherNel
l
ycan’
tyouseeshe’
s
bl
i
nd!
”Say
sTsepo
“
Unamangawenar
eal
l
y!Lookatme
Mi
ra,
herey
esl
ooknor
mal
mos!
”
Doest
hisgi
rlhav
etobet
hisl
oudmar
a,
y
est
hemusi
cisl
oudbutshe’
stoohi
gh
maan.
“
ComeMi
raIwi
l
lshow”say
sTsepo,
he’
stheonl
ywho’
swel
comi
ngot
her
s
don’
tseem t
oli
keme.Igetupandt
ake
met
othebat
hroom,
heshowsme
ev
ery
thi
ngt
henl
eav
esaf
terIt
hankhi
m.
Idomybusi
nessandwashmyhands
t
henwal
kout
.AsIwal
kIf
eel
someone
cov
eri
ngmymout
hfr
om t
hebehi
ndand
dr
agsmet
oanunknownpl
ace.It
ryt
o
wi
ggl
emy
sel
fbutheseem t
obet
o
st
rongert
hanme.Ibi
tehi
shandonmy
mout
handhegr
oans
“
Bit
ch!
!”Ir
ecogni
zehi
svoi
cei
t’
s
I
nnocent
.
“
Hel
l
lpppLwandl
elwenkosi
i
i”Iscr
eam
ashepushesmedownt
othef
loor
.
“
Noonei
sgoi
ngt
oheary
out
hemusi
c
i
spl
ayi
ngl
oud.
”Hel
aughs
“
Pleasedon’
thur
tmeme”Icr
yshi
ver
ing
wi
thf
ear
.
“
Youar
egi
vi
nghi
m ni
cehuh!That
’swhy
hedumpedmysi
sterf
ory
ou!
”
“
I’
m sor
ry,
Idi
dn'
tknowany
thi
ngmi
na”
Het
ri
est
otakeof
fmyj
eanbutIki
ckmy
f
eet
.He’
snotgi
vi
ngupandhe’
s
ov
erpower
ingme.I
t'
snousescr
eami
ng
becausenoonei
sgoi
ngt
ohearme.
Lwandl
elwenkosi
wher
ear
eyou?

.
300comment
s1kl
i
kes
CHAPTER13(
Sundaysnack-
nyana)

“
Whatdoy
ouhav
ethatmysi
ster
doesn’
thav
ehuh!
”
“
I’
m beggi
ngy
oupl
ease”Icr
y,hef
inal
l
y
succeedi
ntaki
ngof
fmyj
ean.
“
Itmustt
hepussy
!Let
’smehav
eat
ast
e
ofabl
i
ndgi
rl
’spussy
”Hesay
sri
ppi
ng
mypant
iesof
fmeandIscr
eam.Lor
d
pl
easedon’
tlethi
m hur
tme,
I’
m beggi
ng
y
ou.If
eel
hisheadbet
weenmyl
egs,
sni
ff
ingmyv
agi
na
“
Mmm y
ousmel
lsof
reaki
nggood!
!”
“
Pleasedon’
tdoi
tngi
yakucel
a,Iwi
l
l
br
eakupwi
thLwenkosi
justl
etmego
pl
ease”
Ibegdesper
atel
y
“
Shutt
hef
uckup!
!”If
eel
ast
ingi
ngon
mycheekandscr
eam i
nagony
.
“
Mir
a!!Dol
l
face!
!”Thr
ought
hebur
sti
ng
noi
seoft
hemusi
cIcanhearhi
svoi
ce
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
overher
e!”Iscr
eam
myl
ungsoutandhepr
esseshi
shand
onmymout
h.
“
Bit
chIsai
dshutt
hef
uckup”Tear
srol
l
downont
hesi
deofmyf
aceasIf
eel
his
handf
iddl
i
ngdownt
her
e
”Wher
ethehel
li
sshehuh!
!If
somet
hinghappenedt
oher
,Iswear
TshepoIwi
l
lki
l
lyou!
!Mi
ra!
”Weheara
l
oudknockont
hedoor
“
It
’sl
ockedwhyi
slocked.Opent
his
doorTshepoorIwi
l
lbr
eaki
tdown!
!”
“
Youneedt
ocal
m downLwa,
thi
sismy
par
ent
shousey
oucan’
tbeaki
tdown!
”
Say
sTshepo
“
Idon’
tfucki
ngcar
edoy
ouhearme!I
wantmygi
rl
!”Al
oudbangont
hedoor
f
oll
ows
”
Mir
a!”Foramomenti
tfeel
sli
kea
dr
eam t
hatIcanhearhi
svoi
cei
nthi
s
r
oom.
“
Yousonofabi
tch!
!”I
naspl
i
tsecondI
f
eel
Innocent
’swei
ghtof
fmeandhe’
s
gr
oani
ngl
oudl
y.
“
Whatt
hef
uckmanha.
ah!I
’
m goi
ngt
o
ki
l
lyouI
nno!
!”Byt
hewayI
nnoi
s
gr
oani
ngIcant
ell
thatLwandl
elwenkosi
i
sbeat
ingherup
“
Lwamf
ethucal
m down!
”Say
sTshepo
“
Leav
emeal
oneTshepo,
Iwantt
oki
l
l
t
hismot
her
fucker
!!
!”Wher
ewashef
or
anhoursekaz
ofi
kamanj
eesef
una
ukubul
alanj
e.Icur
lmy
sel
fupi
ntoabal
l
andcr
yont
hatsamespot
.If
eel
hands
wr
appi
ngabl
anketar
oundmeandj
ump
up
“
I’
m sor
rymyDol
l
face”Hesay
swi
th
cr
yingav
oiceashescoopsmeupand
wal
kawaywi
thme.I
’
m sur
ethe
at
tent
ioni
sal
lonusnow.Themusi
cis
nol
ongerpl
ayi
ngal
lIcanheari
svoi
ces
ofdi
ff
erentpeopl
etal
ki
ngatt
hesame
t
ime.Ther
ear
ethosewhoar
ecur
sing
I
nnocentandt
her
eal
sot
hosewhoar
e
f
eel
i
ngsor
ryf
orme.It
hankGodwhenI
f
eel
acol
dbr
eez
ehi
tt
ingmyski
nwhi
ch
meanswear
eout
side.Hegent
lypl
aces
mewher
eIassumei
shi
scarandsi
ts
nex
ttome,
hol
dingmecl
oset
ohi
sar
ms
“
Her
e’sherst
uffman”say
sTshepo
“
Pleasedr
iveust
othepol
i
cest
ati
on”
“
Idon’
twantt
ogot
othepol
i
cej
ustt
ake
mehomepl
ease”Icr
y
“
Butbabyt
hatasshol
eneedt
opayf
or
v
iol
ati
ngy
ou”Ishakemyheadno.Al
lI
wantr
ightnowi
smymot
her
“
NoIwantmymom Lwandl
elwenkosi
,
pl
ease”
“
Shhi
t’
sokaybabydon’
tcr
y..
.Dr
iveIwi
l
l
gi
vey
out
hedi
rect
ionsman”
“
Okay
”Thecarst
art
smov
ing.
“
I’
m sor
ry”Lwenkosi
whi
sper
sinmyear
.
Ihav
eal
ott
osayandaskhi
mri
ghtnow
butIdon’
thav
eener
gy.Al
lthr
ought
he
dr
iveI
’
m sobbi
ngsi
l
ent
lyagai
nsthi
s
chestandhei
str
yingt
ocal
m medown.
Whenwear
ri
vehescoopsmeupand
wal
ktot
hehouseIpr
esume.
“
Iwasaboutt
ocal
..
.what
’sgoi
ngon?
”
AsksDad.
“
Mir
acl
e”Hear
inghersweetv
oiceopens
t
het
apsf
orme.
“
Baby
,what
’sgoi
ngon”shesay
swi
tha
shaki
ngv
oice
“
Cany
oupl
easeshowmewher
eIcan
puther
”Say
sLwandl
elwenkosi
wit
ha
r
athercal
mvoi
ce
“
Eyboyt
alkwhathav
eyoudonet
omy
daught
er!
!”
“
Iwi
l
lex
plai
nMrKhumal
o…”
“
Comet
othel
i
vingr
oom andpl
aceher
t
her
e”mom say
sandLwenkosi
wal
ks
wi
thmet
othel
i
vingr
oom andpl
aces
meont
hecouch,
mom si
tsnex
ttome
pul
l
ingmet
oherembr
ace.Icanhear
hert
huddi
nghear
t.
“
Wear
eli
steni
ngt
alkboy
”say
sdadand
r
ightnowIf
eel
soscar
edf
orhi
m
becauseIknowhowdadi
s.
“
Uhm Mi
rauh”Hest
utt
ers
“
HeyheyIdon’
thav
ethewhol
eni
ght
!!
”
Scr
eamsmydad.
“
Cal
m downKhumal
oandl
ett
heboy
ex
plai
n”Tshepoex
plai
nwhathappened.
“
Ohnkosi
yami
”mymom bur
sti
ntoa
l
oudcr
y
“
Whaaaat
!!
”Dadshr
ieksi
nanger
“
I’
m sor
ryMrKhumal
o…”
“
Yousor
rywher
ewer
eyouwhenmy
daught
ergotr
apedhuh!
!”
“
Hewentt
othel
oodaddy
”Isay
,thi
s
l
ooksugl
yal
ready
,theycan’
tknowt
hat
Lwenkosi
disappear
edonmewi
thhi
sex
.
Dadwoul
dki
l
lhi
m.
“
Ever
ythi
nghappenedsof
astdaddybut
hesav
edmebef
oreI
nnocentcoul
drape
me”Iadd
“
Idon’
tcar
ehepr
omi
sedt
otakecar
eof
y
oupr
incess!Whydi
dhet
akey
out
oa
par
tyknowi
ngv
erywel
lwhatki
ndof
f
ri
endshehashuh!
!”
“
I’
m sor
ryMrKhu.
..
ahhhh”Hegr
oans
andIj
ustknewt
hatdadi
sbeat
inghi
m
up
“
Mom pl
easest
ophi
m”
“
Khumal
ocal
m downpl
easet
he
si
tuat
ionwasbey
ondt
heboy
’scont
rol
weshoul
dbegr
atef
ult
hatshe’
ssaf
e
andwasn’
traped”
“
Bongat
akeMi
raandgot
othe
bedr
oom”
“
Daddypl
ease,
I’
m beggi
ngy
oudon’
t
hur
thi
m”
“
Bongadontmakemer
epeatmy
sel
f!
!”
Mom get
supandhel
psmeupandwal
k
awaywi
thme.Icoul
dn’
thel
pbutf
earf
or
cuddl
ecakes.Iknowhewaswr
ongbut
hedoesn’
tdeser
vet
his.
“
Mommypl
easedosomet
hinghewi
l
l
ki
l
lhi
m!”
“
Hewon’
tki
l
lhi
m sweet
hear
t”
“
Yourhusbandi
samur
der
ermommy
,
y
ouknowt
hat
!”
“
Comeandst
opsay
ingsucht
hings,
you
wanthi
mtoheary
ou”Shepul
l
smet
o
t
hebedandcuddl
esmeasIcr
ymy
l
ungsout
.
“
Shhhdon’
tcr
ymymi
racl
e,ev
ery
thi
ng
woul
dbeal
ri
ght
.I’
m gl
adt
hathesav
ed
y
oubef
oret
hatbast
ardhadhi
swaywi
th
y
ou.
”Shesay
swi
thcr
yingv
oice.
“
Iwassoscar
edmommy
,Ishoul
dhav
e
l
i
stenedt
oyou”
“
Heydon’
tbehar
dony
our
sel
f.Youar
e
y
oung,
youhav
etol
i
vey
ourl
i
fef
ull
y.I
wassohappyt
otel
lyout
het
rut
hthat
y
ouar
efi
nal
l
ygoi
ngoutandhav
efun
wi
thot
herki
dsy
ourage.I
’
mjust
di
sappoi
ntedathowt
hingst
urnedout
f
ory
ou”
“
Idon’
tknowwhatIwast
ryi
ngt
odo,
t
hiski
ndoff
uni
snotf
orpeopl
eli
keme
mommy
….”shecut
smeof
f
“
Heyheydon’
tyoudar
esayt
hatMi
ra.
Youar
ehumanj
ustl
i
keany
oneel
sey
ou
deser
vet
oli
vel
i
keany
oneel
se.Your
bl
i
ndnessdoesn’
tli
mity
out
oli
vey
our
l
i
fef
ull
yandhav
efunl
i
keanyot
her
t
eenager
soutt
her
e.Iwanty
out
ogoout
t
her
eandhav
efundoy
ouher
eme?
Don’
tletsoci
etydi
ctat
ehowt
oli
vey
our
l
i
fe.YazMi
ral
i
fei
saconst
antof
st
ruggl
e,t
her
ear
emomentofhappi
ness
andsadnessaswel
lasmomentof
l
aught
erandt
ear
sbutt
oli
vea
pur
posef
ull
i
fe,
youmusthav
ethe
passi
ont
oov
ercomet
heobst
acl
eswe
got
hroughi
nourev
ery
dayl
i
fe.Li
vey
our
l
i
fewi
thaposi
ti
veat
ti
tude”Inodbut
honest
lyIhear
dhal
fofwhatshesai
d,
mymi
ndi
swi
thLwenkosi
.Ihopedad
won’
thur
thi
mthatbadbaki
thi
.
“
Letmegodi
shupf
ory
ou”Ihol
dher
t
ight
ly
“
Pleasedon’
tleav
ememommy
,I’
m not
hungr
y”Shest
rokesmyhai
rcausi
nga
soot
hingsensat
ionIcanf
eel
mysel
f
succumbi
ngi
ntosl
umber
.Inmydeep
sl
eepIcanhearsof
tsobsandIwakeup.
“
Mommy
”shesni
ff
s
“
Babyy
ouar
eawake”shesay
swi
th
hoar
sev
oice
“
Mommywhyar
eyoucr
ying”
“
Uhm.
.not
hingbaby
”
“
Hebeaty
ouupagai
n?”
“
Nohedi
dn’
t”what
’sgoi
ngonkant
i?
“
It
’sLwandl
elwenkosi
babyhe.
..
he.
.”I
r
ememberal
ltheev
ent
sofl
astni
ght
andmyhear
tbeat
shar
der
“
Mom wher
eishe?Whatdi
ddaddot
o
hi
m?”I
tcomesoutasawhi
sper
.I’
m not
sur
eIwantt
ohearwhatshe’
saboutt
o
saybecauseIcanf
eel
itt
hati
t’
sgoi
ng
l
eav
emei
ndespai
r
“
He.
..
he’
sdeadbaby
”Myhear
tst
op
beat
ingasherwor
dechoesi
nmyear
s.
“
I’
m sor
r…”
“
Nononohe’
snotdeadmahecan’
tbe
dead!
”
“
OhbabyI
’
m sor
ry…”
“
Noooo!Iwantmycuddl
ecakes
mommypl
ease,
bri
nghi
m backt
ome”I
br
eakdownaspai
nengul
fsmywhol
e
body
.It
ryt
obr
eat
hebutmyl
ungsar
e
f
ail
i
ngme.
“
Mir
a,babypl
easedon’
tdot
hist
ome
.
Breat
hebabypl
easeMi
racl
e!”she
shakesmer
oughl
yandIwakeup
dr
enchedi
nsweatandt
ear
s
“
Shhhhi
twasj
ustani
ght
mar
e,I
’
m her
e
okay
”shepul
l
smei
nherar
ms.
“
Itf
eltr
eal
mommy
”
“
Whatwasi
tabout
?”
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
,youwer
etel
l
ingme
he’
sdead.Whatt
imei
sitnowmom.
Wher
eisdad?
”
“
It
’st
hemor
ningsweet
hear
tandy
our
br
eakf
asti
sready
”
“
Iwon’
tst
omachany
thi
ngunt
ilIknowi
t
Lwenkosi
isokaymom.Pl
easeputme
outoft
hemi
ser
y”
“
Mir
aIdon’
tknowwhathappenedt
o
Lwandl
elwenkosi
yourf
atherdi
dn’
ttel
l
meany
thi
ngbuty
ouhav
enot
hingt
o
wor
ryabout
.”Ican’
tbel
i
eveshe’
sso
cal
m aboutt
hiswhol
ethi
ng,
sheknows
howherhusbandi
s.
“
Cany
oupl
easegi
vememyphone”she
r
eleaseahugesi
ghandpul
lmeoutof
herembr
ace.
“
Her
e’sy
ourphone”Shehandsmemy
phoneandIcal
lLwandl
elwenkosi
but
hi
sphonesendmest
rai
ghtt
ovoi
cemai
l
.
“
Mom somet
hingi
snotr
ight
”
“
GoshMi
ray
ouar
ewor
ryi
ngt
oomuch.
I
’
m sur
etheboywentt
oschool
,di
dn’
t
y
ousayhe’
saf
ir
sty
earst
udentat
AFDA”Theuncer
tai
ntyi
nherv
oicei
s
pal
pabl
e,she’
sjustt
ryi
ngt
ost
opme
f
rom wor
ryi
ng.
“
Comeandf
reshenupwhi
l
eImakey
our
bed”Igetoutofbed
“
Wher
e’smuf
fi
n?”
“
Her
e”It
akemuf
fi
nandmakemyway
t
othebat
hroom.Idon’
thav
eener
gyand
st
rengt
hsoIt
akeaqui
ckshower
.Once
I
’
m donewi
thev
ery
thi
ng,
Ijoi
nmom f
or
br
eakf
ast
.I’
m sur
edadl
eftal
readyf
or
wor
k.
“
Mom pl
easet
akemet
o
Lwandl
elwenkosi
Ijustwantt
ochecki
f
hear
ri
vedsaf
elyy
est
erdayorwecoul
d
j
ustgot
othehospi
tal
andaskhi
s
mot
her
”
“
Babypl
easecanwet
alkabout
somet
hingel
se”
“
Howcany
our
elaxl
i
ket
hisasamot
her
knowi
ngt
hatdadcoul
dhav
edone
somet
hingt
oLwenkosi
?”
“
I’
m Mi
ra’
smom nott
hewor
ld’
smom.
Mydaught
eri
sher
esaf
ewi
thme”
“
Wow”Igetup
“
Sitdownandeaty
ourf
oodMi
ra!
”Isi
t
downandeatmyf
oodsul
ki
ng.OnceI
’
m
doneIgot
omyr
oom andcuddl
emy
sel
f.
Ihav
eal
otr
unni
ngonmymi
ndI
’
dcal
l
GugubutI
’
m sur
eshehascl
asses
t
oday
.Ly
ingher
eandnotknowi
ngi
f
Lwenkosi
isokaywor
ri
esmeal
otand
mom i
snothel
pingatal
lsoIcal
l
Mal
umeSox
.
“
Mtwana”
“
Hel
l
omal
umeSoxhowar
eyou?
”
“
I’
m goodmt
wanawena”
“
I’
m al
sof
inemal
umeIj
ustneeda
f
avor
”
“
Any
thi
ngf
ory
oumt
wana”
“
Ineedy
out
otakemet
oBal
i
to…”he
cut
smeof
f
“
Woahbef
orey
ouev
engoanyf
urt
her
mt
wanaI
’
m sor
ryIwon’
tdr
ivey
out
o
y
ourboy
fri
endnev
er!
”
“
Butmal
umet
hat
’sy
ourj
obt
otakeme
wher
everIwant
”
“
Hayaski
esI
’
m sor
ryMi
raMi
raont
he
wal
lthepr
ett
iestoft
hem al
l
.Ir
ather
l
osemyj
obt
hent
akey
out
her
e”
“
Please”
“
Itol
dyout
ost
ayawayf
rom t
hatboy
what
’swr
ongwi
thy
ou”
“
Ilov
ehi
m”
“
Becausehe’
sri
chl
i
key
ouInev
er
t
houghty
ouoneoft
hosegi
rl
s.Idon’
t
knowwhyam Isur
pri
sedl
i
kemot
herl
i
ke
daught
er!
”Hehangsupl
eav
ingme
bewi
l
der
edbyhi
ssuddenout
bur
st.I
spendmywhol
edayi
nmybedmom t
ry
t
ocheermeupbutI
’
m noti
nthemood.
Eachpassi
ngdayIf
eel
li
keI
’
mlosi
ng
mymi
nd,
it’
sbeen4day
snowandI
hav
en’
thear
dfr
om Lwenkosi
.WhenI
askdadhej
ustasks,
howt
hehel
lhe'
s
supposedt
oknowbutIdon’
ttr
usthi
m.
“
Babyeatpl
ease,
youhav
en’
tbeen
eat
ingf
ort
hepastday
s”HowcanIeat
whenIdon’
tknowwher
e
Lwandl
elwenkosi
isori
fhe’
sokay
.
“
I’
m nothungr
y”I
nthatmomentI
r
ecei
veacal
l
.
“
Hel
l
o”
“
Hel
l
oam Ispeaki
ngt
oMi
ra?
”Askt
he
womanont
heot
hersi
de
“
Yeswhoam It
alki
ngt
o”
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
’
sMom”
“
OhMamahowar
eyou?
”
“
Cany
oupl
easegi
vemey
ourdi
rect
ionI
needt
oseey
oui
t’
sur
gent
”
“
Whati
sitMama?I
sLwandl
elwenkosi
okay
?”It
hinkmymom canseet
hatI
’
m
pani
cki
ngsoshet
akesmyphoneand
t
alkt
oLwenkosi
’
smom.Shehangsup
af
tershegav
ehert
hedi
rect
ion
“
What
’sgoi
ngonmymom”Iaskwi
tha
t
remul
ousv
oiceshedoesn’
tsay
any
thi
ngbuthugsmet
ight
lyi
nherar
ms
andf
rom t
hatmomentIknewt
hathi
s
mom’
svi
sitwi
l
lleav
emeshat
ter
ed

.
300comment
s&1kl
i
kes
HappyBi
rt
hdayLandi
weDl
adl
a

CHAPTER14

Thepastf
ewday
shav
ebeenr
ough,
my
daught
erhasn’
tbeenher
sel
fandwhat
wor
ri
esmet
hemosti
stheni
ght
mar
es
she'
sbeenhav
ingaboutt
heni
ghtshe
al
mostgotr
apedbutshe’
sdi
smi
ssi
ng
t
hem.That
’sni
ghtt
raumat
izedher
,
under
standabl
ysoandIhav
ebeen
i
nsi
sti
ngshegoesf
orcounsel
i
ngbut
sher
efused.Ihat
eitt
oseeherl
i
ket
his
andt
her
udeboybei
ngmi
aisnot
hel
ping.Honest
lyI
’
dli
ket
obel
i
evet
hat
hei
snoti
ncont
actwi
thmydaught
er
becausehef
eel
sgui
l
tynotbecausemy
husbanddi
dsomet
hingt
ohi
m.

Iaskedhi
m aboutt
heboyandhesai
d
hedi
dn’
tdoany
thi
ngt
ohi
m butknowi
ng
hi
m,Ihaddoubt
swhi
chmadehi
m angr
y
“
Real
l
yBongaar
eyouaccusi
ngmeof
ki
l
li
ngt
heboyhuh!
!Whatki
ndofawi
fe
ar
eyouhuh!Howcany
out
hinkoft
hat
abouty
ourhusband!
!”Hebel
l
owed
angr
il
yandIdi
dn’
twantt
oant
agoni
ze
hi
mfur
thersoIapol
ogi
zed.I
’
mtr
ying
har
dtokeephi
m cal
m andsweetandso
f
ari
t’
swor
king.Heev
enal
l
owedmet
o
sl
eepwi
thMi
rasi
nceshehasbeen
hav
ingni
ght
mar
es.Iknowt
hisi
snot
i
deal
hav
ingt
owat
chwhatt
osayt
ohi
m
sot
hathedoesn’
tgetangr
ybutIbel
i
eve
t
hatal
lthi
swi
l
lwor
koutper
fect
lyi
nthe
end.

Iwasonacal
lfewsecondsagowi
th
Lwandl
elwenkosi
’
smom,
shedi
dn’
tsay
muchbutshesoundsv
erydi
str
aught
.I’
d
bel
yi
ngi
fIsayi
t'
snotf
reaki
ngmeout
.
Whati
fKhumal
odi
dsomet
hingt
oher
son,
ohLor
dleti
tnotbewhatI
’
m
t
hinki
ng.Howwoul
dIcomf
ortawoman
knowi
ngv
erywel
lthatmyhusbandi
s
r
esponsi
blef
orherson’
sinj
uryorwor
se
deat
h.Ican'
tev
ent
hinkofhowt
hat
woul
dshat
termydaught
er’
sli
tt
lehear
t.
I
t’
sbeent
woweeksi
fnotonesi
nce
t
heset
wohav
ebeendat
ingbutmy
daught
eri
sint
odeepwi
tht
hisboyandi
t
qui
tescar
y.

“
Mommywhat
’sgoi
ngon”Mi
raasks
wi
thashi
ver
ingv
oice
“
Let
’swai
tforherbaby
,shedi
dn’
tsay
much”She’
spani
cki
ngandherbodyi
s
shi
ver
ing.
“
ComeIwi
l
lpoury
oul
i
tchi
jui
cet
ocal
m
y
oudown”Ihel
pheroutoft
hebedand
gi
vehermuf
fi
n.Thebedi
swher
eshe'
s
beenspendi
ngherday
s.Wemakeour
wayt
otheki
tchenandsi
tsdownwhi
l
eI
pourherf
avor
it
ejui
ce.
“
Her
eyougo”Shet
ri
est
otaket
hegl
ass
butherhandsar
etr
embl
i
ng
“
Mir
ayouneedt
ocal
m downmybaby
”
“
Ican’
thel
pmy
sel
fmom”asol
emnt
ear
f
all
downhercheekandIwi
pei
twi
thmy
t
humbt
henhel
pherdr
inkherj
uice.We
hearabuz
z,It
hinkt
hat
’s
Lwandl
elwenkosi
’
smom.Iputt
hegl
ass
ont
hecount
erandat
tendher
.Awhi
te
RangeRov
erspor
twi
tht
int
edwi
ndows
dr
ivesi
n.I
t’
spul
lov
eri
nmydr
ivey
ard
andapet
it
ewomanst
epoutt
henmake
herwayt
owar
dst
hedoor
.Iwel
comeher
wi
thabi
gsmi
l
eonmyf
acet
ryi
ngt
o
easemyner
ves.
“
Hel
l
o”She’
ssobeaut
if
ul,
hermel
ani
n
ski
ngor
geousl
yfl
awl
ess
“
Hiy
oucancomei
n”Imakeaspacef
or
hert
omakeherwayi
n.I
’
mtr
yingt
oread
herf
acebutIcanseem t
ogetnswer
s.
“
Thanky
ou…y
ouhav
eabeaut
if
ul
house”shesay
sroami
ngherbi
gbr
own
ey
esar
oundmyki
tchen.OkayIdon’
t
t
hinksomeonewhoj
ustl
ostherson
coul
dhav
eti
met
ocompl
i
mentanot
her
woman’
shouse.Iguesst
hat
’sagood
si
gnr
ight
?
“
Thanky
ousomuch”
“
I’
m Zol
ekaNkosi
,Lwandl
elwenkosi
’
s
mom”
“
NokubongaKhumal
o,Mi
ra’
smom
comel
et’
sgot
othel
i
vingr
oom and
hav
easeat
”
“
Nicet
omeety
ou,
Nokubonga.Hel
l
o
Mi
ra”shewal
kst
oherandpul
l
sherup
t
oherembr
ace
“
Pleaset
ell
meLwandl
elwenkosi
isokay
,
pl
ease”shebur
sti
ntot
ear
s
“
Ohbaby
,yesLwandl
eisf
inephy
sical
l
y”
“
Real
l
y?”Asksacr
yingMi
raasshepul
l
s
awayf
rom t
heembr
ace
“
Yesbaby
”Ir
eleaseasi
ghofr
eli
ef,
she
wi
peshert
ear
sthent
akeherhandasI
l
eadt
hem t
othel
i
vingr
oom.Wesi
t
downwi
thMi
rai
nthemi
ddl
e.
“
Wher
eisheMr
sNkosi
?Ihav
en’
tbeen
abl
etor
eachhi
min4day
snow”
“
Whathappenedt
omom now?
”Mi
ra
gi
ggl
eshy
ly
“
I’
m sor
ry”
“
Nopr
obl
em mychi
l
d..
.I
’
m sur
e
Nokubongay
ouar
ewonder
ingwhyI
’
m
her
e,Iwantt
oapol
ogi
zef
orwhat
happenedsi
si.Mysont
oldmehow
car
elesshewasandhowt
hingst
urned
out
.I’
m sososor
ry,
Ican’
tbegi
nto
i
magi
nehowy
ouar
efeel
i
ngespeci
all
y
y
ouMi
ra.
”Shebr
ushesMi
ra’
shand“
I’
m
sosor
ryf
rom t
hedeepestofmyhear
t,I
f
t
her
e’ssomet
hingIcoul
ddopl
easel
et
meknowandIwi
l
lgl
adl
ydoi
t.
”She
soundssi
ncer
e
“
Nopr
obl
em si
si,
weunder
standt
he
si
tuat
ionwasbey
ond
Lwandl
elwenkosi
’
scont
rol
butI
’
m
gr
atef
ult
hathesav
edherbef
oret
hings
gotwor
se.I
fitwasn’
tforhi
m wewoul
d
bet
alki
ngadi
ff
erentst
ory
.Youhav
e
not
hingt
owor
ryaboutwear
etr
yingt
o
mov
eonf
rom whathappened”
“
Thanky
ousi
s,mysonhav
en’
tbeen
hi
msel
fev
ersi
ncet
hatni
ght
.Hehas
beenl
ocki
nghi
msel
finhi
sbedr
oom and
he’
snotgoi
ngt
oschool
.Ionl
ymanaged
t
ogett
hroughhi
mtodayt
hati
swhyI
sawt
heneedt
ocomeandapol
ogi
ze”
“
Hemust
n’tbehar
donhi
msel
fIt
’snot
hi
sfaul
tandhedi
dn’
tknowhi
sfr
iendi
s
capabl
eofv
iol
ati
nggi
rl
s.”
“
Mysoni
sver
yfr
agi
l
e,hehasbeen
t
hroughal
otandt
hedeat
hofhi
s
br
otherhadt
oadd.Theywer
ever
ycl
ose
andhet
ookhi
slastbr
eat
hei
nhi
s
ar
ms.
”Myhear
tsi
nks
“
Mir
atol
dmeaboutt
hat
,I’
mreal
l
ysor
ry
f
ory
ourl
osesi
s.Ihav
enev
erl
ostachi
l
d
butIcani
magi
nehowpai
nful
itmustbe.
Nomot
herdeser
vet
obur
yherchi
l
d.I
’
m
sosor
ry”shebl
i
nksbackhert
ear
sand
smi
l
es
“
Thanky
ou…Iunder
standt
haty
oumi
ght
notwanthi
m neary
ourdaught
eraf
ter
whathappenedbutcany
oupl
easegi
ve
hi
m achancet
oapol
ogi
zet
oMi
ra.
”
“
Zol
ekasi
si,
Ihav
enot
hingagai
nsty
our
son,
inf
actIl
ovehi
m mor
eforsav
ing
mydaught
er.Icoul
dnev
erwanthi
mto
st
ayawayf
rom mydaught
er.He’
sav
ery
goodboyandbesi
det
hisgi
rlher
ewoul
d
ki
l
lmei
fIwer
etokeephi
m awayf
rom
hercuddl
ecakes”Wegi
ggl
e
“
Thanky
ou,
canshegonowandt
alkt
o
hi
m.He’
sint
hecar
”Mi
ra’
sfacel
i
tup
andahugesmi
l
ebr
eaksacr
ossherf
ace.
“
PleaseMom”Il
augh
“
Ihav
en’
tref
usedmosMi
ra,
go!
”She
gi
ggl
esandki
ssesmycheekt
henwal
ks
out
.Il
ookatherunt
ilshe’
soutofsi
ght
.
“
Ihav
en’
tseent
hissmi
l
eal
mostt
he
whol
eweek.Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ng
t
hrough,
youhav
enoi
deahowmuchI
hav
emi
ssedseei
nghersmi
l
eli
ket
hat
”
“
Iknowsi
si,
trustmeIknow.Thanky
ou
f
ory
ourunder
standi
ngnowIknowt
hat
hecansl
eepbet
terknowi
ngt
hathe
t
alkedt
ohi
sDol
l
face.
”
“
Youngl
ovehey
”Wechuckl
e
“
Yest
heyj
ustr
emi
ndmeofmyhusband
andIwhenwef
ir
stmet
”shesay
swi
tha
smi
l
eonherf
ace.Youcanseet
hatshe
r
eal
l
ylov
esherhusband.
“
Doy
ouwantsomet
hingt
odr
ink?
”
“
Ithoughty
ouwi
l
lnev
erask”wel
augh,
sheseemsl
i
keagoodwoman.
“
Cof
feepl
ease”
“
Comi
ngr
ightupnow”Igetupand
makemywayt
otheki
tchent
opr
epar
e
t
wocupsofcof
feeandbi
scui
ts.Once
I
’
m done,
Itaket
het
rayandwal
ktot
he
l
ounge,
placet
het
rayont
hegl
asst
abl
e
andsi
tdown.
“
Thanky
ousi
si”Wehav
eourcof
feeand
bi
scui
tsov
eral
i
ghtchat
.
“
Sowho’
sNokubongaKhumal
o”Il
augh
“
Womany
oumakemef
eel
li
keI
’
m ona
dat
e”shegi
ggl
es
“
Ijustwantt
oknowt
hemot
herofmy
f
utur
edaught
eri
nlawi
sthatabad
t
hing”
“
Ofcour
senot
”Wegett
oknowone
anot
her
,she’
sadoct
orbypr
ofessi
on.
Shet
rul
ylov
esherwor
kthewayshe
beamswhenshet
alksaboutsav
ing
l
i
ves.Ienv
yherbecauseonceupona
t
imeIdr
eamtofbei
ngadoct
orbuthey
l
i
fehadot
herpl
ans.Herhusbandi
sher
f
ir
stl
overf
rom hi
ghschool
,howsweet
.
Theyhav
ebeenmar
ri
edf
or20y
ear
s,
shemar
ri
edatt
heageof20whenshe
f
all
pregnantwi
thherl
ateson.Shehas
ani
nter
est
ingl
i
feandhercompanyi
s
r
efr
eshi
ng.

-
TosayI
'
mrel
i
vedt
olear
nthatmy
cuddl
ecakesi
sokaywoul
dbean
under
stat
ement
.Idon’
tknowwhat
woul
dhav
ebecomeofmehadhedi
ed
onme.I
t’
sfunnyi
nashor
tspaceof
t
imehehasbecomeahugepar
tofmy
l
i
fet
hatIdon’
tseemy
sel
fli
vi
ngwi
thout
hi
m.Howev
erIneedanswer
s.Ineedt
o
knowwhatwashedoi
ngf
oranhour
wi
thhi
sexgi
rl
fr
iend.Heengul
fsmei
n
hi
sar
ms,
Lor
dknowshowmuchI
mi
ssedhi
m.Ihol
dhi
mfordearl
i
fe
t
aki
ngal
lhi
sdev
inescenti
nmynost
ri
ls.
Hepul
l
smebackandki
ssesmy
f
oreheadt
henhel
psmei
nthecar
wi
thoutawor
d.I
nfewsecondswedr
ive
outt
owher
everhe’
sdr
ivi
ngt
o.Noone
i
ssay
ingany
thi
ng,
thet
ensi
oni
ncari
s
al
mostt
angi
ble.Thecarf
inal
l
yst
ops
andI
’
m assumi
ngwehav
ereachour
dest
inat
ion.

“
Canwej
umpt
othebackseatsowe
cant
alk”Hear
inghi
svoi
cef
ort
hef
ir
st
t
imei
n4day
ssendst
ingl
i
ngsensat
ion
downmyspi
ne.
“
Okay
”Hehel
psmeoutoft
hecarand
wemakeouri
nthebackseat
.Het
akes
mebysur
pri
seandsmasheshi
sli
ps
i
ntomi
ne,
asweetsoundescapeshi
s
mout
hasIhol
dhi
sfaceandi
ntensi
fy
t
heki
ss.If
eel
hisf
inger
ti
psonmybar
e
wai
stcr
eat
inganex
hil
arat
ingsensat
ion.
Ican’
thel
pamoant
hatescapesmy
mout
hasourt
oungesf
ight
sfor
domi
nance.Hebr
eakst
heki
ssl
eav
ing
mepant
ingandwant
ingmor
e
“
Yourki
ssi
ngski
l
lsar
egr
owi
ngeach
secondMaShwabada,
I’
m soi
mpr
essed”
Igi
ggl
eshy
ly
“
Ihav
eagoodt
eacher
”
“
Isi
t?”Hi
svoi
cei
sbut
ter
edwi
th
sat
isf
act
ion
“
Yeah”
“
Howar
eyou”Iheav
easi
ghasIt
hinkof
howmi
ser
abl
eIwaswi
thouthi
m kant
i
he’
sokay
.
“
Howcany
oudot
hist
ome
Lwandl
elwenkosi
,4day
s!Doy
ouknow
howwor
ri
edIwasabouty
ou!
”If
eel
hot
t
ear
sst
reami
ngdownmyf
ace
“
I’
m sor
ryMi
raI
…”
“
Sor
ry,
ist
hatal
lyoucansay
?”
“
Cal
m downpl
ease”Hecupsmyf
ace
andwi
pesmyt
ear
s.
“
Ithoughty
oudon’
twantt
oseeme
agai
naf
terwhathappened”
“
Howcany
out
hinkoft
hatLwenkosi
?”
“
Youwer
eal
mostr
apedbyaper
sonI
cal
lmyf
ri
endbecauseofmeMi
ra.I
shoul
dn’
thav
elef
tyoual
one,
Iwasso
car
elesspl
easef
orgi
veme”sadnessi
n
hi
svoi
cei
sev
ident
“
It
’snoty
ourf
aul
tthatI
nnocentwant
ed
t
orapeme.Whatwer
eyoudoi
ngf
oran
hourLwandl
elwenkosi
,wi
thy
ourex
.”He
si
ghsheav
il
y
“
SheneededmeMi
raI
…”wowt
his
unbel
i
evabl
eIcuthi
m of
f
“
AndIdi
dn’
tneedy
ou?Wowt
ell
mewhy
di
dyouaskmet
ogowi
thy
out
othe
par
tyi
fyouknewt
haty
ouwer
egoi
ngt
o
spendi
twi
thy
ourexgi
rl
fr
iend.Doy
ou
knowhowst
upi
dIf
elt
,wai
ti
ngf
ory
ou,
hopi
ngt
haty
ouwoul
dcomebackf
or
me.Youknowhowf
rust
rat
ingi
tisf
or
met
obei
nanewpl
acebuty
oudi
dn’
t
car
ebecausey
ourexgi
rl
fr
iendneeded
y
ou.It
rust
edy
ou,
henceIagr
eedt
ogo
wi
thy
oubuty
oumademyf
ir
st
ex
per
ienceatt
hepar
tyhor
ri
ble.
…”I
bur
sti
ntoasob
“
I’
m sor
ry,
Itwasnev
ermyi
ntent
iont
o
l
eav
eyoual
onest
handwasami
”
“
Wer
eyouhav
ingsexwi
thher
?”
“
What
?Nosweet
hear
t,Iwoul
dnev
erdo
t
hatt
oyou.Nandi
want
edust
otal
kso
wedi
d.She.
.she’
s.
.she’
spr
egnant
”my
mi
ndf
reez
eandmyhear
twantt
obur
st
outofmychest
“
I’
m sor
rybutIdi
dn’
tcheatony
ouMi
ra.
Shewasscar
edandcr
ying,
tal
ki
ng
aboutt
ermi
nat
ionandIcoul
dn’
ttake
t
hat
.YesI
’
m notr
eadyt
obeaf
ather
nowbuthe’
sher
enowandt
her
e’s
not
hingIcando.Iwant
edt
omakesur
e
t
hatshe’
snotal
one.
Iwi
l
lsuppor
thert
hroughoutt
he
pr
egnancy
.I’
m sosor
rymyDol
l
face”oh
goshoutofal
lthet
hingst
hisi
sthel
ast
t
hingIex
pect
ed.Whatdoest
hismean
f
orus?I
fhel
eftmet
her
eforanhourt
o
makesur
ehi
sbabymamai
sokay
,
cl
ear
lyhecar
esaboutNandi
.
“
Saysomet
hingpl
ease”Hesay
staki
ng
myhandsi
ntohi
s
“
Whataboutus?
”
“
Not
hingchangesbet
weenusMi
ra,
I
st
il
ll
ovey
ouandIwi
l
lal
way
slov
eyou.
Nandi
isj
ustamot
herofmychi
l
d”
“
It
’schangesev
ery
thi
ng
Lwandl
elwenkosi
,She’
scar
ryi
ngy
our
chi
l
dandI
’
mjustat
hir
dwheel
.”
“
Don’
tsayt
hatpl
ease”
“
Buti
t’
str
ue,
youandIcannev
erwor
k.
I
’
m sor
ry,
Ican’
tdot
his”st
reamsof
t
ear
sfl
owedf
ast
ert
henmyhear
tbeat
“
Mir
adon’
tdot
hispl
ease,
Ilov
eyou.We
canmaket
hiswor
k”
“
IknowwhenI
’
m notneeded
Lwandl
elwenkosi
.Inev
erdeser
vedy
ou
i
nthef
ir
stpl
ace.Youar
eagr
eatguy
,
y
oudeser
veal
lthebestl
i
fecanof
fernot
abl
i
ndgi
rlwhoy
ouhav
etobaby
sit
ev
eryt
imey
out
akehert
oapl
aceshe
hasn'
tbeen.Youal
readyhav
eababyon
t
hewayy
oudon’
tneedt
obaby
sitabi
g
bl
i
ndbaby
.I’
mtoomuchwor
kfory
ou
Lwandl
elwenkosi
,admi
tit.Takeal
ook
whathappenedatt
hepar
ty,
I…”
“
Shutup!Shutt
hef
uckupbecausey
ou
ar
etal
ki
ngbul
l
shi
tnow!
!Youhav
eno
f
ucki
ngr
ightt
othi
nkf
ormeandmake
deci
sionsf
orme.Yesy
ouar
emybaby
notbecausey
ouar
ebl
i
ndandIhav
eto
baby
sity
oubutbecauseIl
ovey
ouandI
enj
oyt
aki
ngcar
eofy
ou!That
'swhata
mandoes,
het
akescar
eofhi
swoman.
I
’
m sor
ryt
hatt
hingst
urnedoutt
hisway
f
orus,
itwasnev
erpar
tofmypl
ansand
I
’
m sor
ryf
orl
eav
ingy
ouatt
hepar
tybut
y
ouar
enotdumpi
ngmeMi
ra!Hel
lno,
y
oucan’
tdot
hatt
ome!
”
“
Lwa…”
“
Nopl
ease,
I’
m beggi
ngy
ou.Don’
tleav
e
me”If
eel
hisheadonmybr
eastashe
hol
dsmecl
osert
ohi
m,sobbi
ng.
“
Don’
tleav
emepl
ease”Li
steni
ngt
ohi
m
cr
yisbr
eaki
ngmyhear
tbuthowcanI
i
gnor
ethef
actt
hatt
heset
wowi
l
lhav
ea
babyt
hatwi
l
lfor
everbi
ndt
hem t
oget
her
nomat
terwhat
.HowcanIt
rustt
hat
t
hei
rrel
ati
onshi
pwi
l
lbebasedon
r
aisi
ngt
hei
rbabyonl
y.Lwandl
elwenkosi
l
ovesf
ami
l
yandhe’
sthatboy
,whowant
hi
ski
dst
ogr
owupwi
tht
hei
rbot
h
par
ent
ssowher
edoest
hatl
eav
emei
n
al
loft
his?

.
300comment
s&1kl
i
kes
HappyBi
rt
hdayThul
i
sil
eThul
i

CHAPTER15

Zol
ekaandIseem t
ogetal
ongv
erywel
l
,
t
her
e’ssomet
hingmol
l
ify
ingabouther
companyandonecan’
thel
pbutf
all
in
l
ovewi
thherbubbl
yper
sonal
i
ty.We
hav
ebeenchat
ti
ngandl
aughi
ng,
you'
d
swearwear
eol
dfr
iends.Icoul
dn’
thel
p
not
ici
ngt
hatwehav
eal
oti
ncommon.
“
Thi
sisl
ovel
yweshoul
dspendt
ime
t
oget
hermor
eof
ten,
that
'si
fyoudon’
t
mi
ndofcour
se”shesay
ssmi
l
ing
“
Ofcour
seIdon’
tmi
nd,
whywoul
dI
mi
nd?Ir
eal
l
yenj
oyget
ti
ngt
oknowy
ou
Zo”asmi
l
ebr
eaksacr
ossherf
ace
“
Met
oo,
it’
srar
etof
indawomanl
i
ke
y
ou”
“
Womanl
i
keme?
”Igi
veherar
aised
ey
ebr
ow,
andshegi
ggl
es
“
Youknow,
wewomenhat
eeachot
her
f
ornopar
ti
cul
arr
eason.Wet
akeone
l
ookatoneanot
herandbel
i
kear
ghI
don’
tli
keher
”Wel
augh,
that
’ssodamn
t
rue.I
nst
eadofsuppor
ti
ngeachot
her
aswomenwebr
ingeachot
herdown.I
f
onl
ywecoul
dempowereachot
her
,the
wor
ldwoul
dbeabet
terpl
ace.
“
Theset
woar
eenj
oyi
ngeachot
her
’s
companyandt
heyhav
efor
got
tenabout
us.Ishoul
dgetgoi
ngnow.Idon’
twant
mydaught
ert
oar
ri
veandf
indnooneat
home”Shet
wit
chesherwr
istandgaz
e
athersl
i
verwat
chwr
ist
“
Okaysi
sthanksf
orcomi
ng”Webot
h
getupandmakeourwayt
othemai
n
ex
it
“
CanIhav
eyournumber
”Igi
vehermy
number
sandshesav
est
hem.Justas
wear
eout
sidet
heRangeRov
erspor
t
dr
ivesi
n.Wedi
dn’
tev
enr
eal
i
zet
hey
wer
enother
eal
lal
ong.
“
Itwasr
eal
l
yni
cet
omeety
ouBonga
andt
hanky
ouf
orwel
comi
ngusand
y
ourunder
standi
ng”Weshar
eahugand
wat
chhersonbei
ngagent
leman,
openi
ngt
hedoorf
ormydaught
er.
“
He’
ssuchgent
leman,
your
aisedhi
m
v
erywel
l
”
“
Thanky
ou”Wemeett
hem hal
fast
hey
maket
hei
rwayt
ous.Ican’
thel
pbut
not
icet
hei
rredey
es,
theyhav
ebeen
cr
ying.
“
Isev
ery
thi
ngokay
”Zoasksl
ooki
ngat
t
hem
“
Yesmom”Lwandl
eresponds
“
Mir
a?”Zosay
sandt
hatopenst
apsf
or
mydaught
er.
“
Babywhat
’sgoi
ngon”Ipul
lheri
nmy
embr
ace
“
Whatt
hef
uckhav
eyoudonet
oher
i
diot
!Youwer
esupposet
omakeher
happynotcr
ydammi
t”Zoshr
iekswi
th
anger
“
I’
m sor
ryMa”Lwandl
esay
swi
than
al
mostcr
yingv
oice
“
Fuckof
fmaan!
!”Shepul
l
shi
m byan
earwhi
chcauseshi
mtogr
oani
npai
n
“
Ahhhngi
yax
oli
samaah!
!”(
I’
m sor
ry
maah)Lwandl
egr
oansi
npai
n.
“
Whathav
eyoudonet
oher
?”
“
Let
’sgowewi
l
ltal
kathome”
“
OhLwandl
elwenkosi
,whathav
eyou
donenow!
”
“
Zocal
m downpl
ease,
gohomeandt
alk
aboutt
his”
“
Nxuy
adi
nal
oasambe!
”(He’
sannoy
ing
l
et’
sgo!
)Sheki
ckshi
sassashewal
ks
t
othecar
.Thi
swomant
hough.
“
Mir
abeokaymybaby
,Iwi
l
lsor
tthi
s
i
diotwhenwegethome”
“
Byesi
s”Imakemywayi
nsi
dewi
tha
cr
yingMi
raandpul
lhert
omychestasI
si
tdownwi
thher
.
“
Tal
ktomemybaby
”Shemumbl
es
i
ncoher
entt
hingsasshechokesonher
t
ear
sandi
t’
sbr
eaksmyhear
tint
o
mi
l
li
onpi
eces.What
evert
hathappened
i
sbi
gandi
thasbr
okenherbey
ond.I
st
rokeherhai
rcal
mingherdowni
t
al
way
sdoest
het
ri
ck.
“
Tal
ktoMommy
,myMi
racl
e”
“
It
’sLwenkosi
Mommy
”
“
Whatdi
dhedo?
”Iask
“
He.
.Ibr
okeupwi
thhi
m”ohmypoor
baby
“
Ohbabywhy
?Ist
hisaboutt
hatni
ght
?
Youshoul
dn’
tpuni
shhi
m Mi
racl
e,he
sav
edy
ou”
“
Thet
rut
hisIl
i
edMommy
,when
I
nno.
..
uhm y
ouknowLwandl
elwenkosi
wasnoti
nthel
oo.Hedi
sappear
edon
mewi
thhi
sexgi
rl
fr
iendf
oranhourand
nowt
heexgi
rl
fr
iendi
spr
egnant
”
“
What
?Wai
twheny
ouwer
eal
most
r
apedhewasf
ucki
nghi
sgi
rl
fr
iend?
”
“
Not
heywer
etal
ki
ngaboutt
he
pr
egnancy,
thegi
rlwast
alki
ngabout
t
ermi
nat
ionandLwandl
elwenkosi
doesn’
twantt
hatsohewasmaki
ng
sur
ethatt
hegi
rlknowsshe’
snotal
one
andhewi
l
lsuppor
ther
”Woot
hishuge
f
ormybabygi
rl
“
Soy
oubr
okeupwi
thhi
m?”
“
Yesmama,
Idon’
twantt
obet
het
hir
d
wheel
andIcanseet
hatLwenkosi
real
l
y
car
esf
orNandi
.Ithur
tsdeepdowni
n
myhear
tbecauseIl
ovehi
m mama.I
l
ovehi
m somuchandIdon’
twanna
l
osehi
m butt
her
e’snot
hingIcando”I
heav
easi
gh.Youngl
oveshoul
dn’
tbe
compl
i
cat
edl
i
ket
hismaan.
“
WhatdoesLwandl
elwenkosi
sayabout
t
his”
“
Hedoesn’
twantmet
oendour
r
elat
ionshi
p.Hesay
shel
ovesonl
yme
notNandi
.Nandi
'
sjustt
hemot
herofhi
s
chi
l
dbutmom howcanIt
rustt
hatt
hei
r
r
elat
ionshi
pwi
l
lbebasedonr
aisi
ng
t
hei
rbabyonl
y?”
“
OhmybabyI
’
m sor
ryandIunder
stand
y
ourf
rust
rat
ionst
hisi
stoomuch.You
guy
sar
esupposedt
obeenj
oyi
ngy
our
r
elat
ionshi
pnott
his.Yourar
etooy
oung
t
obeast
epmom mybaby
.Thedr
ama
t
hatcomeswi
thbabymamasi
stoo
much.Idon’
twanty
out
obehur
tmor
e
t
hany
oual
readyar
e.Youmadear
ight
deci
sion.I
fyouandLwandl
ewer
e
meantt
obe,
youwi
l
lfi
ndawayt
oeach
ot
her
’sar
ms,
fornowl
ethi
m gobaby
.
Hehast
oomuchbaggagef
orhi
sage.
Bot
hofy
ouar
est
il
lyoungf
orcr
yingout
l
oud”
“
ButIl
ovehi
m mom.
”
“
Iknowbabybutt
hisi
stoomuchf
or
y
ou”
“
Youal
sol
ovedadmos,
eveni
fhebeat
y
ouup”myhear
tdr
opst
omyst
omach.
“
Youar
ecompar
ingt
wodi
ff
erentt
hings
Mi
ra.Youar
e18y
ear
sol
d,y
ou'
re
supposet
obehav
ingf
unnotbecomi
ng
ast
epmom.Hel
lnoIwon’
tal
l
owt
hat
”
Shebur
sti
ntoal
oudsobandIcomf
ort
her
.Thel
astt
hingIwanti
sformy
daught
ert
ohol
doni
ntoar
elat
ionshi
p
wher
e’sshe’
snothappyandhav
eto
sacr
if
icet
oomuchofher
sel
fbutam I
nott
eachi
nghert
hesamet
hingt
hatI
don’
twantt
ohappenbyl
ovi
ngKhumal
o
ev
enaf
tert
hewayhet
reat
sme?Si
gh!

Li
fei
snochi
l
d’spl
ay.ThedayIbecame
amot
herIchoset
ost
opl
i
vingf
or
my
sel
fandl
i
vedf
ormydaught
erbut
whatbr
eaksmet
othecor
eist
hatme
doi
ngwhat
'sbestf
orheri
shur
ti
ngher
.
Thi
nki
ngabouti
tnowmakesmer
eal
i
ze
t
hatIj
udgedmymot
herhar
shl
yand
nev
er,
notev
enf
orasecondhav
eIt
ri
ed
t
oputmy
sel
finhershoesy
etI
’
mthe
onewho’
ssay
ingy
oucannev
er
under
standunt
ily
ouwal
kami
l
einmy
someone’
sshoes.NowIunder
standt
he
sacr
if
icesandpai
nmom wasendur
ing
f
orus.Ther
ewasnot
hingshecoul
d
hav
edone,
sheal
readyhad3chi
l
dren
whoneededt
obepr
ovi
dedf
or.She
choset
ost
aywi
thdadandpl
ayhappy
si
sterwi
fewhi
l
esheknewdeepdown
i
nsi
deshewasdy
ing.Asl
ongasher
chi
l
drenhadashel
terov
ert
hei
rheads
andsomet
hingt
oeatev
ent
houghi
t
wasnott
hesameast
heot
herf
ami
l
y,i
t
wasbet
tert
hannot
hing.I
tsaddensme
t
hati
ttookmeal
lthesey
ear
stor
eal
i
ze
t
hatmom di
dwhatshet
houghtwas
bestf
orusj
ustasmuchasI
’
m doi
ng
whatbestf
ormydaught
er.I
fIcoul
d,I
’
d
r
ewi
ndt
imeandmaker
ightdeci
sions.I
al
l
owedanger
,resent
mentandhat
eto
cont
rol
meandnowI
’
mli
vi
ngt
he
consequencesofmyi
mpet
uosi
ty.

Iwi
pemyt
ear
sthatcantst
opf
all
i
ngon
herpi
ctur
e.I
tsSat
urdayar
ound2i
nthe
mor
ning.I
’
m hav
ingagl
assofwi
ne,
dr
owni
ngmysor
rowsi
nthel
ounge.I
r
ememberwhenshet
ookt
hispi
ctur
e.I
t
wast
hisdayoft
hismont
handwewer
e
cel
ebr
ati
ngherbi
rt
hday
.Shehada
beaut
if
ulsmi
l
eonecoul
dev
erhav
e.I
wonderi
fshe’
sst
il
lal
i
ve?Doessheev
en
t
hinkaboutme?Ir
eal
l
ymi
ssherso
muchIunder
standshewas
di
sappoi
ntedbutIwi
shshef
oughtf
or
met
hough.Imadeami
stakeIknowbut
t
hrowi
ngmeoutl
i
ket
rashwas
ov
erboar
d.
“
Honey
”Iwi
pemyt
ear
sandl
ookupat
myhusbandashemakeshi
swayi
n.
He’
sonl
yinhi
sbox
ers.Iswal
l
owal
ump
i
nmyt
hroatandf
akeahugesmi
l
e
“
Yes”Hel
ooksatt
hegl
assofwi
neon
t
hegl
asst
abl
eandt
hepi
ctur
eofmy
mot
heri
nmyhandandsi
ghsbef
ore
si
tt
ingnex
ttome.
“
It
’sherbi
rt
hdayr
ight
?”Inodwi
thmy
headnott
rust
ingmyv
oice
“
Idon’
tunder
standwhydoy
oukeep
t
ort
uri
ngy
our
sel
fli
ket
hisev
eryy
earf
or
someonewhodi
dn’
tev
enf
ightf
ory
ou
wheny
ourdadt
hrowy
ououtl
i
keadog”
myhusbandhat
esmyf
ami
l
yforwhat
t
heydi
dtome.Tr
uthi
shedoesn’
tknow
t
hef
ull
trut
h,It
oldhi
mthesamest
oryI
t
oldMi
raofwhi
chi
shal
ftr
uthbuthei
s
r
ightmymot
herwassupposedt
ofi
ght
f
orme.
“
Ican’
thel
pmy
sel
fImi
sshersomuch
t
oget
herwi
thmysi
ster
s”
“
Shedoesn’
tlov
eyouBongawher
ewas
sheal
lthesey
ear
swheny
ouwer
eal
one
r
aisi
ngy
ourdaught
erhuh?Wher
ewas
shewheny
ouneededhert
hemost
?It
’s
been18y
ear
ssi
ncey
oul
efthomeno
onei
sev
ent
ryi
ngt
ofi
ndy
ouayst
op
wast
ingy
ourt
ear
sst
handwasami
.I’
m
her
efory
ousoi
sMi
ra.Wear
eyour
f
ami
l
yandI
’
m sur
esoonwear
egoi
ngt
o
hav
eanaddi
ti
ont
oourf
ami
l
y”Il
ookat
hi
m wi
thar
aisedey
ebr
ow
“
What
?”
“
It
’st
ooear
lyf
oraddi
ti
on”
“
Ear
lyf
orwhat
?Wehav
ebeenmar
ri
ed
f
orf
our
syear
s”Idon’
twantt
obr
ing
anot
herchi
l
dofmi
nei
nthi
stox
ic
env
ironment
.
“
Wear
enotr
eadyf
orababyKhumal
o”
Hegi
vesmeani
ntensel
ook
“
Youmeany
ouar
enotr
eadybecauseI
knowIam”Ichuckl
eshaki
ngmyhead
“
Howi
nsensi
ti
vear
eyouhuh?
Wej
ust
l
ostourbabyaweekback.I
’
m st
il
l
mour
ningf
orhi
m pl
easel
etmebe”
“
I’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
tmeant
obei
nsensi
ti
ve
butIf
eel
li
ket
hisi
smor
ethenj
ust
mour
ninghi
m.”Somet
imesIwonder
howt
hisman’
smi
ndwor
k.
“
Bonga”
“
Yini
?”(
What
?)
“
Uthi
yini
kimi
yini
?”(
Arey
ousay
ing
whatt
ome?
)
“
NoI
’
m sor
ry”
“
Comel
et’
sgot
obed”
“
I’
m comi
ng”Hedoesn’
tsayany
thi
ng
butscoopsmeupandwal
kwi
thmet
o
ourbedr
oom.Hegetusi
nbedandpul
l
s
met
ohi
schestwhi
l
epl
ayi
ngwi
thmy
hai
runt
ilIdoz
eof
f.Thedev
inesmel
l
f
il
lsmynost
ri
ls.Iopenmyoneey
eand
t
her
ehei
swi
that
rayi
nhi
shands.
“
Mor
ningmybeaut
if
ulwi
fe”Iopent
he
ot
herey
eandy
awn
“
Mor
ning”
“
Imadey
oubr
eakf
astgetupandeat
”
Heputt
het
rayont
hebedsi
det
abl
e
“
Letmegobr
ushmyt
eet
hfi
rst
”Isl
i
de
outofbed,
hespanksmyassIgi
ggl
eas
Imakemywayt
othebat
hroom.Iwash
myf
aceandmymout
hthenwal
kback
t
othebedr
oom.Isi
tont
hebedandhe
gi
vesmemybr
eakf
ast
,gi
nger
bread
f
rencht
oastwi
thci
nnamonhoneysauce
andgl
assofor
angej
uice,
mymout
h
wat
ersi
nst
ant
ly.
“
Mmhy
ummyt
hanky
ousomuch”
“
Nopr
obl
em myl
ove.
..Ihav
eagol
f
meet
ingt
odayl
etmegetgoi
ng”
“
OhIt
houghty
ouar
espendi
ngt
he
weekendwi
thust
oday
”Todayi
soneof
t
hoseday
sIwi
shIcoul
dspendi
t
wr
appedi
nhi
sar
ms
“
I’
m sor
rybutIwi
l
lbequi
ckokay
”Inod
wi
thmyheadasmymout
hisf
ull
.He
pl
ant
sapeckonmycheeksandl
eav
es.
OnceI
’
m donewi
thmybr
eakf
astIpul
la
r
obeandgot
otheki
tchent
oputt
he
di
shesi
nthesi
nkt
hencomebackt
o
t
akeashower
.Ihearmyphoner
ingi
ng
butIwi
l
lat
tendi
twhenI
’
m done.If
ini
sh
wi
thmyshowerandski
ptot
he
bedr
oom.It
akemyphoneandcal
lback
t
heper
sonwhowascal
l
ingme.
“
Noku”I
ttakessomuchofmenott
o
t
hrowmyphoneont
hewal
l
.Thi
smani
s
annoy
ingy
eses!
“
Ufunani
Skhal
o!”(
Whatdoy
ouwant
Skhal
o)
“
Canwemeetandt
alkpl
ease,
I
acknowl
edgemymi
stakeNokupl
ease”
I
tst
imeIdeal
wit
hthi
sbef
oremy
husbandf
indout
.Iagr
eet
omeethi
m
andhangup.Iunwr
apt
het
owel
and
l
oti
onmybodyt
hengetdr
essedi
n
t
racksui
ts.I
’
m noti
nthemoodt
odr
ess
upandI
’
m sur
etr
acksui
tsar
enott
hat
bad.Imaket
hebedf
ir
stt
hent
akemy
phoneandmycarkey
s.YesIdohav
ea
carbutIhar
dlyusei
tbecauseI
’
m
al
way
sdr
ivi
ngwi
thmyhusband.
Act
ual
l
yIdon’
tli
ket
odr
ive,
it’
saMer
c
AMGE63S.Ihav
etoi
nfor
m my
daught
erf
ir
stbef
oreIgobutshe’
snoti
n
herbedr
oom.May
beshe’
sint
he
bat
hroom myhear
tski
psabeatwhenI
t
hinkoft
hedayshedr
ownedher
sel
f.
Thebr
eakupi
stear
ingherapar
twhati
f
she.
..
no!Letmenotev
ent
hinkabout
t
hat
.Iwal
ktot
hebat
hroom butst
il
lI
can’
tfi
ndher
.Isear
chf
orheral
lov
er
t
hehousebutshe’
snowher
etobe
f
ound,
okayI
’
m pani
cki
ngnow.Ical
lher
andsheanswer
sont
het
hir
dri
ng
“
Mommy
”
“
Wher
ear
eyouMi
ra,
I’
mlosi
ngmymi
nd
her
e!”
“
I’
m sor
rymommybutIknewt
haty
ou
woul
dnotal
l
owme.
”
“
Wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
I’
m..
.hav
ing.
.br
eakf
ast
..wi
th
.
.Lwenkosi
”Shest
utt
ers.Ohheav
ens
t
hischi
l
disbecomi
ngsneakynow.
“
Usuy
asamanj
ewenawhendi
dyou
l
ear
ntosneakouthuh?
”
“
I’
m sor
ryMa,
Ihav
etogo”
“
Mi….
”shehangsupbef
oreIf
ini
shIsi
gh.
Idon’
tli
ket
hisonebi
t.Iunder
standt
hat
t
heyl
oveeachot
herbutt
hisboyhast
oo
muchbaggagef
ormybabyhaaai
!On
t
hewayIpl
aygospel
,i
tal
way
shasa
wayofcal
mingmedown.Iar
ri
veatour
agr
eedspotandmakemywayt
ohi
m.
“
Hi”
“
Heyy
oul
ookbeaut
if
ul”Ir
oll
myey
es
andsi
tdown
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Let
’sor
derf
ir
st”Hesay
s
“
I’
mfi
neIj
usthadbr
eakf
astl
et’
sjustget
st
rai
ghtt
othepoi
nt”Hesi
ghsandl
ooks
atme.GoshIcanbel
i
eveIsl
eptwi
th
t
hisman,
thi
nki
ngabouti
tnowmakes
mewantt
opuke.I
t’
sfunnyt
hatev
en
af
teral
lthesey
ear
shehasn’
tchanged.
He’
sst
il
lugl
ywi
thf
lyi
ngbi
gear
sanda
af
ro.Godamanwhohasaf
roi
n
nowaday
sli
ker
eal
l
y?
“
Whenar
eyoushav
ingy
ourhai
r?”He
chuckl
esandpathi
spi
l
low#af
ro.I
sweari
t’
sbi
gli
keumqamel
o(pi
l
low)but
atl
easti
t’
slookscl
ean.
“
Iwon’
tyouknowi
nkol
oyami
ay
ingi
vumel
i
”(mybel
i
efdoesn’
tal
l
ow
me)Il
ookathi
m conf
used
“
Ngi
khonz
akaShembedon’
tyou
r
emember
”Idi
dn’
tknowandIdi
dn’
t
car
einf
actIst
il
ldon’
tcar
eIj
ustwant
hi
m outofmyl
i
febef
orehemesses
t
hingsupf
orme.
“
Ohy
es”If
akeasmi
l
e
“
LookNoku,
Iacknowl
edgemymi
stake
andI
’
m sor
ry.IknowIhav
enor
ightt
o
comeher
eandex
pecty
ourwel
come.I
wr
ongedy
ouNokuandf
ort
hatI
’
mreal
l
y
sor
ry”
“
Youdon’
thav
etobesor
rySkhal
oyou
di
dn’
tdoany
thi
ngwr
ong”Icl
earmy
t
hroat
,howdoIt
ell
himt
hiswi
thout
hur
ti
nghi
sfeel
i
ngs.
“
Uhm Mi
rai
snoty
ourdaught
er.Iwas
desper
ateandst
randed,
Ithoughty
ou
woul
dbeamanandt
akecar
eofusi
fI
pi
nthepr
egnancyony
oubuty
out
old
met
ogetr
idi
tofi
t.Ij
ustknewy
ouandI
hav
enof
utur
etoget
her
”Hel
aughsl
i
ke
r
eal
l
ylaughsat
tr
act
ingat
tent
iononus
i
nthepr
ocess.
“
Youar
esof
unny
”Hel
ooksatmeand
r
eal
i
zet
hatI
’
m notj
oki
ng
“
Soy
oucheat
edonme!
”Cheat
edhai
bo?
“
Cheat
edwer
ewedat
ing?
”
“
Thepassi
onweshar
edt
oget
her
Noku…”Icuthi
m of
f
“
Itwasj
ustsex
,Iwashur
tandangr
y.I
j
ustwant
edt
ofor
getandy
ouwer
ether
e
t
ocomf
ortme.I
’
m sor
ry”
“
Sor
ry,
yousaysor
ry!Il
ovedy
oudammi
t
andy
oupl
ayedme!
!”Skhal
ouset
oask
meoutandIwasnoti
nter
est
edt
heguy
wasannoy
ingmaan.Ihadahugef
ight
wi
thmyf
atherandwentt
ohi
mfor
comf
ortandbef
oreIknewi
thewas
bur
ieddeepi
ntome.
“
Youar
esocr
uel
!Ispenty
ear
shat
ing
my
sel
fforwhatIdi
dtoy
oukant
iyou
wer
emaki
ngmey
ourdom kop!I
’
m so
di
sappoi
ntedony
ou.Ican’
tbel
i
eveI
hav
eev
erl
ovedy
ousi
es!Skhohl
akal
i
somf
azi
…”Hebana!
“
WoahIwon’
tsi
ther
eandl
i
stent
oyou
i
nsul
ti
ngmeasi
fyouar
eper
fect
.You
di
dn’
tknowIwaspl
ayi
ngy
oubuty
ou
t
oldmet
ogetr
idofi
t.Youseey
ouar
e
al
sonotper
fectsosav
eyouri
nsul
ts.
”I
smel
lhi
sscentandmyhear
tbeatf
ast
.
Nohe’
snother
e!Hecan’
tbeher
e.
“
Bonga”ohl
ord!I
’
m dead.
“
Honey
”Isayf
aki
ngasmi
l
eheki
sses
met
henl
ooksatSkhal
o.
“
Andwhoi
sthi
s?”
“
Noonei
mpor
tant
”Isay
,Skhal
ocl
i
cks
hi
stoungeandgetup
“
Don’
tleav
eonmyaccount
”
“
Iwasl
eav
ingv
ele”Hewal
ksaway
“
Let
’sgo”Igetupandhehol
dsmywai
st
t
ight
lyt
hati
t’
shur
tsaswemakeour
wayout
.Heopenst
hedoorf
orme
“
Whataboutmycar
?”Isaywi
than
al
mostshi
ver
ingv
oice
“
Iwi
l
lfet
chi
tlat
er!Geti
nthecar
!”Iget
i
n,hesl
ammst
hedoorshutt
henwal
kto
hi
ssi
de.Al
lthewayhei
scl
enchi
nghar
d
ont
hest
eer
ingwheel
andhi
shandsar
e
pul
sing.Myhear
tispoundi
nghar
d
agai
nstmychestohl
ordpl
easecal
m
hi
m down.Themomentwegeti
nsi
de
t
hehousehesl
apsmehar
dandIr
eel
backwar
ds
“
Uyaf
ebaBonga!
!”
“
Not
hat
’snott
r…”Hesl
apsmeagai
n
“
Don’
tyoudar
emakemey
ourf
ool
!I
t
houghty
ouar
edi
ff
erentbuty
ou
womenar
ethesame!
!Youar
etwo
t
imi
ngmebi
tchhuh!It
ookcar
eofy
ou
andy
ourbl
i
ndchi
l
dist
hishowy
ou
t
hankme!
!”Hepunchesmeonmyf
ace
“
Letmeex
plai
nKhumal
…”Hest
rangl
es
me,
Igaspf
orai
randhet
ight
enhi
sgr
ip.
Iseemyl
i
fef
lashi
ngbef
oremyey
es
andt
ear
smaket
hei
rwayout
.
“
Kokoko”Weherv
oicesayont
hedoor
andhel
et’
smegoandwal
ksoutl
eav
ing
mecoughi
nghar
d.
“
Ijustbumpedi
ntoy
ourhusbandatt
he
doorhedi
dn’
tev
enl
etme.
..
Bongaar
e
y
ouokay
”Zosay
shol
dingme,
Inodmy
headbutmyt
ear
sst
rol
ldown.
“
Wha.
.whathappenedt
oyourf
ace?”
Shepul
l
smei
nherembr
aceandwego
downt
othef
loor
.Shedoesn’
tsay
any
thi
ngbutcomf
ort
smei
nherar
msas
Il
etoutagutwr
enchi
ngsob.
-

I
t'
snowSat
urdaymor
ning,
Irecei
veda
cal
lfr
om Lwenkosi
inv
iti
ngmef
or
br
eakf
ast
.It
ri
edt
ost
ayawayf
rom hi
m
butadaywasenoughIcoul
dn’
tspend
anymor
eday
swi
thoutseei
nghi
m.I
mi
ssedhi
m somuchandhehasbeen
cal
l
ingmenonest
op,
beggi
ngmet
onot
endourr
elat
ionshi
p.Il
ovehi
m andhe
l
ovesme,
that
’sal
lthatmat
ter
s.Lov
e
conquer
sal
l
,atl
eastt
hat
'swhatGugu
sai
dtomewhenIt
oldheraboutt
he
si
tuat
ionathand.“
Chommadontal
l
ow
t
hathoet
otakey
ourman.She’
sbi
tt
er
shewant
stodest
royy
ourr
elat
ionshi
p
wi
thLwandl
elwenkosi
may
beshe’
snot
ev
enpr
egnant
,shecoul
dbel
yi
ngort
he
babyi
snotev
enhi
s”Shehasapoi
ntso
her
eIam wi
thmycuddl
ecakeshav
ing
br
eakf
astatmuggandbean.Isneaked
outact
ual
l
ymom woul
dhav
enot
al
l
owedme.Iwi
l
ldeal
wit
hherwhenI
gethome.
“
She’
sangr
y?”AsksLwenkosi
“
Yes”
“
Butbabyy
oushoul
dhav
easkedher
”
“
Shewasnotgoi
ngt
oal
l
owme”
“
Youar
esneakyst
handwasami
”We
gi
ggl
e
“
Iseeshe’
snothappyaboutt
he
pr
egnancy
”Inod
“
ButIl
ovey
ouLwenkosi
andIdon’
t
wantt
olosey
ou.
”
“
Youwon’
tlosememybaby
.Il
ovey
ou
mor
eandt
hatwi
l
lnev
erchangeokay
?”I
smi
l
eandcont
inuehav
ingmybacon
andeggt
oast
.Hesai
dhedoesn’
thav
e
anappet
it
esoI
’
mtheonl
yoneeat
ing.
“
Baby
”Isay
“
Yesmyl
ove”
“
Arey
ousur
ethatNandi
ispr
egnantand
t
hechi
l
disy
our
s?”
“
Yesmom madeherdot
het
est
y
est
erday
.She’
sreal
l
ypr
egnantandof
cour
seshe’
scar
ryi
ngmychi
l
dbecause
she’
stwomont
hpr
egnant
.Iknowt
hat
shewasnotcheat
ingonme”Ican’
thel
p
butf
eel
ashar
ppai
nofj
eal
ousyi
nmy
hear
t
“
Didn’
tyousayshewasnotgi
vi
ngy
ou
at
tent
ionwhati
fshewasgi
vi
ngi
tto
someoneel
se?
”
“
Isai
dthatbutIwasj
erkhonest
ly
becausei
t’
snotl
i
keshedi
dn’
twantt
o.
Shehadt
otakecar
eofhergr
andmot
her
anddoot
herst
uff
.”
“
Ohsoy
our
eal
l
ylov
eherneh?
”
“
Ofcour
senotst
handwasami
.Il
ove
y
ou”
“
Youbr
okeupwi
thherweeksago
Lwenkosi
howcany
ouf
all
formeso
qui
ckl
y?”
“
Shet
hrewher
sel
fatme,
Inev
erl
oved
her
”Thesi
ncer
it
yinhi
svoi
cewor
ri
es
me.
“
Yousayshe’
staki
ngcar
eofher
gr
andmot
her
”
“
Yest
heyl
i
vewi
tht
hei
rsi
ck
gr
andmot
her
.Theydon’
tknowt
hei
r
par
ent
sthei
rmom l
eftt
hem wi
tht
hei
r
gr
andmot
herwhent
heywer
efew
mont
hsol
dandnev
ercameback.
I
nnocentandNandi
aret
wins,
she’
s
I
nnocent
iaact
ual
l
ybutshedoesn’
tli
ke
hernamesoshecal
l
edher
sel
fNandi
”I
ki
ndaf
eel
sor
ryf
ort
hem
“
Who’
staki
ngcar
eoft
hem f
inanci
all
y?”
“
Theydependi
ngont
hegr
andmot
her
’s
gr
antandI
nnodoesoddj
obst
her
eand
t
her
e.”Thi
sishear
tbr
eaki
ngandi
t
makesmeappr
eci
atemymot
herev
en
mor
eforev
ery
thi
ngshei
sdoi
ngf
orme.
Ineedt
odosomet
hingf
orherj
ustt
o
showmyappr
eci
ati
on.
“
MmhIsee”Het
akesmyhandsi
ntohi
s
“
Thanky
ouf
orgi
vi
ngusachance.I
pr
omi
sey
out
hatwegoi
ngt
obef
ine.
Ther
ewon’
tbeat
imewher
eyouwi
l
lfeel
l
i
key
ouar
eat
hir
dwheel
yez
wa”Inod
hi
sphoner
ings
“
‘Mom.
..
ahmamacan’
tyougowi
thher
Snoy
ahl
upha.
..
okayokayI
’
m comi
ng”
Hehangsupandgr
oans
“
Wehav
etogomymom andy
our
sar
e
goi
ngoutsoshewantmet
obaby
sit
Snosi
ncedadi
swor
kingt
oday
”
“
Okaywecango”Hepay
sthebi
l
lst
hen
wel
eav
e.Ican’
twai
tforust
oar
ri
ve.Hi
s
carhast
hisunpl
easantsmel
li
t’
smakes
menauseasIev
ent
ast
edi
tinhi
sli
ps
whenweki
ssed.
“
Mir
ahel
l
o”say
shi
sfat
her
“
Greet
ingsMrNkosi
”
“
Howar
eyou”Hehugsme
“
I’
mfi
nesi
rhowar
eyou?
”Wepul
lapar
t
“
I’
m al
sof
ine.
..
munchki
nisst
il
lsl
eepi
ng
y
ouknowshesl
eptv
eryl
atel
astni
ght
.I
shoul
dgetgoi
ngnowby
eki
ds“
“
Bye”Isayandnot
icet
hatLwenkosi
di
dn’
tsayawor
dtohi
sfat
herormay
be
I
’
mthi
nki
ngt
oomuch.
“
Isev
ery
thi
ngokay
?”
“
Yeswhywoul
dn’
titbe?
”
“
AhI
’
m bei
ngsi
l
ly.
”
“
ComeIj
ustwantt
obei
nyourar
ms
r
ightnow”Het
akesmyhandandwe
wal
ktohi
sbedr
oom.Wel
ayont
hebed
wi
thhi
mrest
inghi
sheadonmybr
east
whi
l
eIpl
aywi
thhi
searwi
thmyf
inger
s.
“
Howf
arar
eyouwi
tht
hepl
an”Iask
“
Iwaswi
thmyuncl
eyest
erdayandwe
di
scussedi
t.Weneedawayt
oinst
all
camer
asi
nyourf
ather
’sof
fi
ceandy
our
housesot
hatwecanknowwhati
she
upt
o.Wehav
eal
readybuggedhi
s
phonebutt
hat
’snotenoughweneed
ev
ery
thi
ngwecangett
onai
lhi
m”
“
InmyhouseayLwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Whatt
hat
’st
heonl
yway
”
“
Iwon’
tfeel
comf
ort
abl
eknowi
ngt
hat
t
her
ear
ecamer
asi
nourhouseandmy
mom anddadar
eal
way
shav
ingsexy
ou
can’
tseemymom nakedLwenkosi
”He
l
aughs
“
OkayIgety
ou,
let
’sputi
tinhi
sst
udy
r
oom I
’
m sur
ethatwher
ehemakesal
l
hi
scal
l
sandwhat
everi
l
legal
deal
i
ngs”
“
Ithi
nksobecauseev
eryt
imeMal
ume
Spi
dercomest
heygot
othest
udy
r
oom”
“
Spi
deri
shi
sri
ghthandman”
“
Arey
ousur
ewecandot
his
Lwandl
elwenkosi
Idon’
twantt
ori
sk
any
one’
sli
fe.
”
“
WhenIhav
emyuncl
eonmysi
de
not
hingi
simpossi
ble”
“
Whyi
syouruncl
ekeent
ohel
pus?
”
“
Wear
ever
ycl
osebabyhewoul
ddo
any
thi
ngf
orme”
“
Younev
ert
oldmey
ourbr
otherdi
edi
n
y
ourar
ms.I
’
mreal
l
ysor
ryt
hatmust
hav
ebeent
raumat
izi
ng”
“
Ist
il
lseehi
m ev
eryt
imeIcl
osemy
ey
es…canwet
alkaboutsomet
hing
el
sepl
ease.Ohy
esIsawt
hispost
onl
i
nei
t’
sasi
ngi
ngcompet
it
ion.It
hink
y
oushoul
dent
ert
hecompet
it
ionbabe”
“
Singi
ngcompet
it
ion?
”
“
Yeswi
tht
hatv
oiceofy
our
s.Ihav
eno
doubty
ouwi
l
lwi
n.Guesswhaty
ou
goi
ngt
owi
n?”Heget
supf
rom mychest
andIcanheari
nhi
svoi
cet
hatheso
ex
cit
ed
“
Money
?”
“
Yes50kandar
ecor
ddeal
”wow
“
Thi
sishugebaby
,Idon’
tknow”
“
Yousi
ngbeaut
if
ulmyl
ove,
justi
magi
ne
i
fyouwi
nyouwi
l
lnotbe50kr
ichbut
y
ouwi
l
lhav
ear
ecor
ddeal
noti
njust
anyst
udi
obutMZst
udi
o!”
“
TheeMZst
udi
o?”
“
Theoneandonl
yMawakhel
omuz
i&
Zesul
i
we’
sst
udi
obabe!
”Thi
sisgr
eat
butam Ir
eadyf
orsuchex
posur
e?What
i
fIr
eal
l
ywi
nwi
l
lIhandl
ethel
i
mel
i
ght
?
Si
ghormay
beIshoul
djustt
aket
he
moneyonl
yandr
efuset
her
ecor
ddeal
.
Mymom andIcanuset
hismoneyt
o
r
unawayf
rom dad.Wecangof
araway
wher
ehecannev
erf
indus.Ev
ery
thi
ng
el
sewi
l
lwor
kit
sel
fout
.
“
Iheary
oubaby
,Iwi
l
lthi
nkabouti
t”
“
That
’sal
laski
ngmybaby
”Heki
sses
meandIsmel
ltheunpl
easantsmel
l
agai
nbuti
t’
snott
hatst
rongnow.Ipush
hi
m abi
t
“
What
’swr
ong?
”
“
Not
hing”
“
Mir
a?”
“
Yourbr
eat
hei
ssmel
l
ingunpl
easant
udl
eni
vel
e?”(
Whatdi
dyoueat
?)
“
Oucht
hat
’shur
tyouknow”
“
I’
m sor
rybutt
hesmel
li
sal
soi
nyour
car
.Whati
sitLwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Nex
”
“
youar
ely
ingt
ome”
“
Hayj
ustl
eav
emeal
onei
nfactl
etme
t
akey
ouhomenowcozsuy
abheda”
“
I’
m noty
ourf
ool
Lwandl
elwenkosi
what
’sgoi
ngon?
”Hedoesn’
tsay
any
thi
ng
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
Nkosi
!”
“
It
’sweedokay
!Ar
eyouhappynow!
”
“
YousmokeweedLwenkosi
?”
“
Oncei
nawhi
l
ewhenI
’
m sof
ucki
ng
st
ressed!
”
“
Doesi
tmakey
ourpr
obl
emsgoaway
?”
“
No”
“
Youdon’
tneedi
tthenbaby
,I’
m her
efor
y
ou.Takeal
lyourf
rust
rat
ionsonme,
of
fl
oadev
ery
thi
ngt
hati
shaunt
ingy
our
soul
”
“
Ever
ythi
ngi
smessedupMi
ra”Hesay
s
wi
thacr
yingv
oice,
Ipul
lhi
m cl
oset
o
mychestandcomf
ort
shi
m ashecr
ies,
wet
ti
ngmydr
ess.
“
Ihat
emy
sel
f,Ihat
ethaty
oual
mostgot
r
apedbecauseofme!Asi
fthat
’snot
enoughy
ouhav
etoacceptmybaby
.”
“
It
’sokaybabyy
ousav
edmenj
e”
“
Ishoul
dn’
thav
elef
tyouMi
ra,
I
shoul
dn'
thav
elef
tyoui
nthef
ir
stpl
ace!
Whatki
ndofaboy
fri
endIam?You
knowseei
ngy
oul
yi
ngt
her
ehal
fnaked
andcr
yingbr
okemebey
ond.I
t.
..
it
r
emi
ndedmeoft
heni
ght
…”hechokes
onhi
stear
s,Ikeepr
ubbi
nghi
sback
“
Theni
ghtmymom gotr
apedi
nfr
ontof
me4y
ear
sback.
Icoul
dn’
tdoany
thi
ng
Mi
ra,
Icr
iedl
i
keabi
tchwhi
l
ethatman
hadhi
swaywi
thher
.Icanst
il
lhearher
cr
iesi
nmyear
s.I
thur
tsy
ouknow,
itst
il
l
hur
ts”Ican’
tev
enbegi
ntoi
magi
nehow
he’
sfeel
i
ng.t
hisi
shear
tbr
eaki
ng
“
Ngi
yax
oli
saLwandl
elwenkosi
”(I
’
m
sor
ry)
“
Ihat
emy
sel
fforf
ail
i
ngmymom!Ihat
e
mydadf
orf
ail
i
ngus!Whenweneeded
hi
m hewasoutt
her
efucki
nghoesand
get
ti
ngdr
unk.Mymom’
spar
ent
sdi
ed
y
ear
sagoi
naf
ir
eanddadt
ook
adv
ant
ageoft
hatbecauseshehadno
oneel
sebuthi
m.Het
reat
edherl
i
ke
t
rash,
Ihat
ehi
m Mi
ra.Isof
ucki
nghat
e
hi
m!”I
’
m acr
yingmessl
i
kehi
m andI
don’
tknowwhatt
osaybutcomf
orthi
m.
If
eel
hispai
ndeepdowni
nmyhear
tI
wi
shIcant
aket
hepai
nawayf
rom hi
m.
Iunder
standhowhar
diti
stowi
tness
y
ourmom i
npai
nbutt
her
e’snot
hing
y
oucoul
ddot
osav
eher
.It
’st
hemost
pai
nful
thi
ngonecanev
erex
per
ience.
.
300comment
s1kl
i
kes
HappyBi
rt
hdaySnehl
anhl
aNgweny
a

CHAPTER16(
Sat
urdaysnack-
nyana&
unedi
ted)

Af
terourcr
yingsessi
onwest
ayi
neach
ot
her
’sar
msl
osti
nourt
hought
s.The
onl
ysoundwecoul
dheari
sourhear
ts
beat
ingi
nsy
nc.It
hinknowIunder
stand
whymycuddl
ecakesi
srude.Hei
s
har
bor
inganger
,pai
nandhat
e.If
eel
sor
ryf
orhi
m Iwi
sht
her
e’ssomet
hingI
candot
ohel
phi
m.Car
ryi
ngsomuch
angerandhat
eisnotheal
thy
.Lookat
dadhe’
spour
ingal
lhi
sangeratt
he
wr
ongper
son.I
’
dhat
etoseemycuddl
e
cakest
urni
ngi
ntoamonst
erl
i
kedad.
Heneedt
odeal
wit
hthi
sandl
ear
ntol
et
i
tgo.

“
Doesy
ourpar
ent
sknowhowy
ouf
eel
especi
all
yyourdad?
”Iask
“
Yeswel
lIdon’
tknowbutour
r
elat
ionshi
phav
enev
erbeent
hesame
ev
ersi
nce.Iwon’
tli
ehe’
sreal
l
ytr
ying
butIcan’
tbr
ingmy
sel
ftof
orgi
vehi
m.
YouknowwhatIhat
ethemosti
sIuse
t
olookupt
ohi
myouknow.Hewasmy
r
olemodel
buthedi
sappoi
ntedme”I
f
eel
him Ir
eal
l
ydo
“
Ican’
tbegi
ntoi
magi
nehowy
ouar
e
f
eel
i
ngbutIknowhowpai
nful
iti
sto
wi
tnessy
ourmom i
npai
nbutt
her
e’s
not
hingy
oucoul
ddo.I
’
m sosor
rybaby
I
’
mreal
l
ysor
ryandy
ouhav
eev
eryr
ight
t
ofeel
thewayy
oudobutpl
easeI
’
m
beggi
ngy
oudon’
tal
l
owpai
n,angerand
hat
etochangewhoy
ouar
e.Idon’
t
knowhowbutIknewt
hatbehi
ndt
hat
r
udear
rogantboyt
her
e’sagood
hear
tedboy
.Ineedy
out
ofi
ndawayt
o
deal
wit
hthi
sandl
ear
ntol
eti
tgo
becauseal
li
tdoesnowi
sst
eal
i
ngy
our
j
oy”
“
Iuset
oat
tendt
her
apyt
woy
ear
sago
andi
thel
pedi
treal
l
ydi
dbutaf
tert
he
deat
hofmybr
otherIf
eltl
ostal
lov
er
agai
nthenseei
ngy
out
hatni
ght
t
ri
gger
edt
hememor
yandpai
n”ohpoor
cuddl
ecakes
“
I’
m sor
rybabyI
’
mreal
l
ysor
ry,
what
happenedt
oyourbr
other
”Her
eleasea
hugesi
gh
“
Hisdeat
hisst
il
lamy
ster
ytome,
in
f
actt
oal
lofusonemi
nut
ehewasf
ine
t
henex
thewasgone.Wewer
ejust
pl
ayi
nggamesasusual
andIwas
enj
oyi
ngbeat
inghi
sass,
outofnowher
e
hecol
l
apsedandconv
ulsed,
rol
l
inghi
s
ey
esatt
hebackofhi
shead.Ical
l
edout
f
orhel
p,hol
dinghi
minmyar
msi
fI’
m
notmi
stakenheconv
ulsedonl
yfor5
mi
nut
est
henhewasgone.Icoul
dn’
t
bel
i
evei
tandIst
il
lcan’
tbel
i
evei
t.
”Hei
s
cr
yingashe’
snar
rat
ingt
hest
ory
.Ikeep
r
ubbi
nghi
sbackcal
minghi
m down.
That
’sav
erypai
nful
wayt
owi
tnessy
our
l
oveonedy
ing.Thi
sboyhav
ebeen
t
hroughal
otandi
t’
shear
tbr
eaki
ng.
“
Shhhdon’
tcr
y,i
t’
sgoi
ngt
obeokay
”
“
Imi
sshi
m somuchMi
ra,
Iwi
shhewas
her
e”
“
He’
sal
way
swi
thy
oubabyokay
”He
nodsohshameman.Iwi
shIcoul
dcar
ry
hi
spai
n.
“
Youknowsomet
imesIev
ent
hink
may
bei
fIl
ethi
m wonhewoul
dst
il
lbe
her
e”
“
Nobabydon’
tdot
hatt
oyour
sel
fpl
ease.
Onl
yGodhaspowerov
erourl
i
ves.No
mat
terwhaty
oucoul
dhav
edonewhen
i
t’
sti
mey
oucan’
tdodgei
t”
Isay
“
IknowheyIknowbutIcan’
thel
pitand
Idon’
twi
shany
onet
oex
per
iencet
he
pai
nofl
osi
ngsomeonet
heyl
ovebut
whoam If
ool
i
ngatsomepoi
ntweal
l
goi
ngt
ofeel
thepai
nofl
osi
ngourl
ove
oneshowev
eri
fther
e’ssomet
hingone
candot
opr
eventpr
emat
uredeat
h
he/
shegot
tadoi
t.Wehav
etogety
our
mot
heroutoft
hatmar
ri
agebef
orei
t’
s
t
ool
ateMi
ra”
“
IknowLwenkosi
Iknow”Thet
hought
al
oneofmymot
herdeadi
ski
l
li
ngme
i
nsi
de.Idon’
tknowwhati
twoul
d
becomeofmei
fIwer
etol
oseher
.She’
s
t
heai
rthatIbr
eat
he,
mywor
ld.
“
Heydon’
tcr
yIwi
l
ldomybestokay
”I
nodandhewi
pesmyt
ear
s
“
Letmegowashmymout
hI’
m comi
ng
now”If
eel
hiswei
ghtof
fmet
henhi
s
f
oot
stepsshuf
fl
ingaway
.Secondsl
ater
he’
sback
“
Howam Ismel
l
ingnow”Hebl
owshi
s
ai
ronmeandIgi
ggl
e.
“
Kissme”Hedoesn’
tneedt
obet
old
t
wice.Hecapt
uresmyl
i
psi
ntohi
sIhol
d
t
hebackofhi
sheadwi
thmyhands
enj
oyi
ngt
hef
ri
cti
ont
hati
scr
eat
edby
ourt
ounges.Icanf
eel
hishands
f
ondl
i
ngmyboobs,hi
sli
psescapesmy
mout
handt
rai
lgent
lyki
ssesonmy
j
awl
i
negoi
ngdownt
omyneck.Hi
s
war
m br
eat
hagai
nstmynecksends
shi
ver
sthr
oughmywhol
ebody
.Ican’
t
hel
pamoant
hatescapesmymout
has
heni
bbl
esandsuckonmyneckwhi
l
e
het
akesof
fmydr
ess.If
eel
all
for
eign
f
eel
i
ngsi
nmybodyandi
t’
sfeel
sso
damngood,
hishandf
indi
tswayonmy
backandunhookmybr
athenhet
akesi
t
of
f.
“
Lookatt
heset
wins,
theyar
eso
beaut
if
ulmami
”Twi
ns?Whatt
wins?I
wantt
oaskhi
m whati
shet
alki
ng
aboutbutmyquest
ioni
srepl
acebya
scr
eam t
hatescapesmymout
hasIf
eel
hi
swar
m mout
honmyni
ppl
e,ci
rcl
i
ng
hi
stoungear
oundi
twhi
l
ekneadi
ngmy
ot
herboobi
nhi
spal
m.Het
rai
l
shi
s
f
inger
sti
psov
ermyst
omachgoi
ng
downunt
ilher
eacht
heapexofmy
t
highsandcupbyv
agi
naov
ert
he
pai
nti
es,
Imoansof
tl
y
“
Fucky
ourpant
iesar
esoakedwi
thwet
baby
”Icanf
eel
them andt
heyar
e
get
ti
ngmor
eweteachpassi
ngsecond.
Thesoundofhi
svoi
cei
saconf
ir
mat
ion
t
omet
hati
t’
snotabadt
hing.He
st
rokeshi
sfi
nger
sov
ert
hewetf
abr
ic
f
eel
i
ngmyf
leshunder
neat
h
“
OhmyMi
ra”Hi
svoi
cesoundsst
range,
I
coul
dbar
elyr
ecogni
zei
t.Het
akesof
f
mypant
iesandspr
eadmyl
egswi
de.
“
Youhav
eabeaut
if
ulpussy
”Henuz
zles
hi
sheadhummi
ngcausi
ngmyv
agi
nat
o
v
ibr
ates.Thef
ir
stst
rokeofhi
stongue
sendsmest
rai
ghtt
oheav
en.Hef
east
onmyv
agi
nal
appi
ngupt
hewet
ness
t
hati
sooz
ingoutofmysl
i
t.If
eel
his
handssl
i
ppi
ngunder
neat
h,t
il
ti
ngmy
but
tupwar
dsanddr
iveshi
stounge
deep.I
ncoher
entscr
eamsescapesmy
mout
hasIl
oseal
lmysenses.Thi
sboy
i
sgoi
ngt
oki
l
lmewi
thpl
easur
ethi
sis
sogood.Nogoodi
sanunder
stat
ement
.
Hest
rokeshi
stonguei
nandout
,inand
out
!
“
OhhhLwe.
..
nkosi
y
ess.
.ahh…kumnandi
..
.hawemah.
.nandi
”
If
eel
tensi
onbui
l
dingupi
nmyv
agi
na
andmymuscl
esconst
ruct
ing
i
nvol
unt
ari
l
y.ohy
essuddenl
yhest
ops
andputmedown.Whydi
dhedot
hat
!
“
Lwe.
.nkosi
”Icr
y
“
Iwantust
ocum t
oget
herbaby
”Huh?
Het
akesmyhand,
IgaspasIf
eel
his
peni
sinmyhandi
t’
swar
m andhar
d
“
Iwon’
tpenet
rat
eyouI
’
mjustgoi
ngt
o
r
ubmy
sel
fony
ourpussyunt
ilwebot
h
cum”
“
Comewher
e?”
Hegi
ggl
es
“
Cum i
sanal
ter
nat
ivewor
dforan
or
gasm andej
acul
ati
on”
“
OhIgety
oubaby
”Hel
aughs
“
Youar
esocut
eyouknow”
“
Mxm…”Heshutmeupwi
thaki
ssandI
don’
twast
eti
mebutki
sshi
m back,
t
ast
ingat
adofsal
tinhi
smout
h.Il
ove
t
hesmel
lofmyv
agi
nai
nhi
smout
h.I
f
eel
himr
ubbi
nghi
msel
fonmywet
cr
otchsl
owl
y,upanddown.
“
Ohhhf
uckbaby
!!
”Hegr
oansagai
nst
myl
i
ps,
OhGod,
pur
ebl
i
ss!I
fthi
show
amaz
ingi
t’
sfeel
sjustbyr
ubbi
ng
hi
msel
fonmehowdoesi
ffeel
swhen
hei
sinsi
de.Thatt
houghtmakeme
y
ear
nthef
eel
ofhi
minsi
deofme.
“
If
akeLwenkosi
”(puti
tin)
“
Huhhh?
”
“
If
akebabypl
ease”
“
Ini
?”(
What
)
“
Iny
okany
okay
akho”(
yoursnake)He
l
etoutachuckl
e
“
NobabyIknowy
ouar
enotr
eady
.”
“
I’
mreadyLwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Nobabyaaahhhf
uck!
!”
“
Lwe.
..
Nkosi
pleaaaasssey
oooahhh”
“
I’
m cummi
ngbabypl
easecum wi
th
me”Hi
sbodyconv
ulsesont
opofmeas
If
eel
war
mli
qui
dagai
nstmyopeni
ng
hol
ecr
eat
inganel
ect
ri
cfy
ingpl
easur
e
al
lov
ermybody
.Ourscr
eamsf
il
lst
he
r
oom aswe“
cum”
.Asar
ewebot
h
cat
chi
ngourbr
eat
hwehearat
inyv
oice
“
But
iwhat
’sar
eyoudoi
ng?
”Idi
dn’
tev
en
heart
hedooropeni
ng
“
FuckmaaanSnogetoutofmyr
oom!
”
“
But
i…”
“
Isai
dout
!”OhGoddon’
ttel
lmet
hat
shesawev
ery
thi
ngwewer
edoi
ng
“
Shi
t!
”Hegr
oans
“
Whydi
dn’
tyoucl
oset
hedoornawe”
“
Shewassupposet
oknockbaby
..
.Iwi
l
l
beback”Hewal
ksoutandcomesback
t
owi
pemyv
agi
nawi
thawar
mtowel
af
tert
hatIgetdr
essed.
“
Comel
et’
sgomakesomet
hingt
oeat
I
’
m st
arv
ing”It
akemuf
fi
nandhehol
ds
myhandaswemakeourwayoutofhi
s
bedr
oom.Whenwegett
otheki
tchenhe
hel
psmesi
tdownanddowhathedoes
t
hebestwhi
chi
sshout
ingatSno
“
Howmanyt
imesdoIhav
etot
ell
yout
o
knockhuh!
!”Wehearv
oicesandbi
tof
l
aught
er
“
Mommy
!”Scr
eamsSno
“
Hel
l
oLwandl
elwenkosi
”mom she’
s
al
soher
e,What
’sshedoi
ngher
e?I
’
m
notr
eadyt
ofacehernow.
“
Greet
ingsMr
sKhumal
o”
“
Lwandl
eisshout
ingatmemommy
”
“
Lwandl
eungangi
hlany
isi
minawhyar
e
y
oushout
ingather
?”askshi
smom
“
It
’shermom shej
ustbur
sti
ntomy
r
oom wi
thoutknocki
ng”
“
Ihear
dthem scr
eami
ngandIwant
edt
o
seewhatwasgoi
ng”ohl
ord!
“
Scr
eami
ng?
”asksmymom cur
iousl
y
“
YesLwandl
elwenkosi
wasscr
eami
ng
l
i
keacowandMi
rawascr
yingl
i
kea
hy
ena”Gosht
hischi
l
dwher
edi
dshe
hearahy
enacr
ying.Thet
wowomen
l
aughsasi
fthat
’snotembar
rassi
ng
enought
hisl
i
ttl
echi
l
dmi
micus
“
If
akeLwenkosi
pleaseeee”
“
Nobabyahhhhhf
uck”Cant
hisgr
ound
openupnowandswal
l
owmepl
ease!
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayNok'
thul
a
OkaSt
henj
waNene
CHAPTER17

Theangerboi
l
ingi
nsi
deofmei
s
i
ndescr
ibabl
e.If
eel
li
keIwi
l
lex
plode
andmywhol
ebodyi
sshi
ver
ing.Igr
ab
ont
hest
eer
ingwheel
har
dwi
thmy
pul
singhandsasIhearherwor
ds
pl
ayi
ngi
nmyear
s“Youneedt
olear
nto
cont
rol
youranger
”Idon’
tthi
nkt
his
womanunder
standt
hatmyangerhas
nocont
rol
l
ingr
emot
eorbut
ton.OnceI
becomeangr
y,Icansquasht
hiswhol
e
wor
ldwi
thmyonehandandnoonecan
ev
enst
opme.Idon’
tknowwher
eIam
dr
ivi
ngandmydr
ivi
ngi
samess.I
gl
anceatmyr
earmi
rr
orasIheart
he
i
diothoot
ingbehi
ndme.Isl
ackenmy
speedsot
hathecanov
ert
akeme.Ihear
hi
mtal
ki
ngashe’
spassi
ngbutI
’
m
unabl
etogr
aspwhathe’
ssay
ingsoI
l
owermywi
ndowandl
ookathi
m
“
Whatt
hef
uckman!Youwantt
oki
l
l
us!
!”Ishowhi
m mymi
ddl
efi
nger
“
Fucky
ou!
!”
“
Fucky
out
oogol
olany
oko!
!”Ihi
tthe
accel
erat
orhar
dmaki
ngi
thar
dforhi
m
t
oov
ert
akemeandspeedof
f.If
ind
my
sel
fpar
kedbef
oreherhouseandget
outofmycar
.Imakemywayt
othegat
e
andwal
kinsi
de.Iknockont
hedoorwi
th
myshaki
nghand.Dur
ingt
heweekI
happenedt
odr
ivemypsy
chol
ogi
stt
o
herhouseaf
teroursessi
onbecauseher
cari
satt
hesomepenal
beat
ersi
ntown.
Ihav
ebeenat
tendi
ngt
hesessi
onsbut
t
omet
heyar
ejustwast
eoft
ime!Ican’
t
br
ingmy
sel
ftosi
tdownandt
alkt
o
somest
ranger
.Idon’
tev
enknowwhyI
am st
il
lat
tendi
ngt
hem,
heckwhyam I
ev
enher
e!
“
Comi
ng!
”Sheshout
sont
heot
hersi
de
oft
her
oom.Sheopenst
hedoorandI
canseet
heshe’
ssur
pri
set
ome.She
l
ooksdi
ff
erenti
nherwhi
tev
estanda
bl
ackpai
rofl
eggi
ngscl
i
ngi
ngonherbi
g
t
highs.
“
MrKhumal
owhat
’sar
eyoudoi
ngher
e”
“
She’
scheat
ingonme!Theyar
eal
lthe
same!Women!
!”Ipushmywayi
nand
paceupanddown,
clenchi
ngmyf
ist
s
“
Fol
l
owme”If
oll
owherasshel
eadst
he
wayandweent
erar
oom t
hat
’sl
ookl
i
ke
agy
m.I
t’
shasf
ewwor
kingout
machi
nes.Shegi
vesmebox
inggl
oves
andIl
ookatherst
upef
ied.
“
Didy
ouhearwhatIj
ustsai
dtoy
ou!
!”
“
Howar
eyou”Sheaskswi
thr
athera
cal
mvoi
ce.Howcanshebecal
m when
I
’
mfumi
ngl
i
ket
his?
“
Howam I
?Ij
ustt
oldy
oumywi
fei
s
cheat
ingonmeandy
ouaskmehowam
I
?!!
”Ibel
l
owedangr
il
y
“
Youar
eangr
y?”
“
Hel
lIam,
noi
nfactangr
ydoesn’
tbegi
n
t
odescr
ibehowI
’
mfeel
i
ngr
ightnow!
!I
coul
dtur
nthi
sli
tt
legy
m ofy
our
supsi
de
down!
!”Shehol
dst
hepunchi
ngbagand
l
ooksatme
“
Star
tswi
tht
hispunchi
ngbag,
showme
howangr
yar
eyou!
”It
hrowt
hegl
oves
ont
hef
loorIdon’
tfucki
ngneedt
hem
andpunchont
hepunchi
ngbag
“
Whathappened?
”Inar
rat
ewhat
happenedt
hrowi
ngmeanpunches
“
Andt
hatmakesy
ouangr
y,doesi
t?”
“
Hel
lyes!Af
terev
ery
thi
ngIhav
edone
f
orheri
sthi
showsheshowsher
gr
ati
tudebycheat
ingonme!
!”I
’
m
f
umi
ngwi
thangerandmypuncheskeep
gr
owi
nghar
derandst
rongerbutshe’
s
hol
dingt
hepunchi
ngbagst
il
l.
“
Idi
dev
ery
thi
ngf
orherandherchi
l
d!I
t
ookt
hem i
nandgi
vet
hem l
ove,
car
e
andwar
mthandshegoesandcheaton
menendoday
eshl
uthuesi
nukay
o!!Iwas
af
ool
tobel
i
evet
hatshel
ovesme!That
shecar
esaboutme!Ar
ghwomenar
e
t
hesame!Theyar
esel
fi
sh,
mani
pul
ati
ve,
unf
ait
hful
,st
upi
d,ungr
atef
ul,
sel
f-
cant
ered,
weak,
bonel
ess,
usel
ess
bi
tches!
”Ipoural
lmyangeroutatt
his
punchi
ngbagandIcanf
eel
it
di
ssi
pat
ingpunchbypunch.
“
Whatwasherex
planat
ion?
”
“
Shedi
dn’
ttel
lme,
whyshoul
dshe
ex
plai
n?Isawt
hem t
oget
her
!”
“
Wer
etheyki
ssi
ng?
”
“
No”
“
Wer
etheyhuggi
ng?
“
No”
“
Wer
etheyhol
dinghands”
“
No”
“
Thenwhatgi
vesy
out
her
easont
othi
nk
t
hatshe’
scheat
ingony
ou”
“
Becauseshedi
dn’
ttel
lmet
hatshe
woul
dgomeetamani
nsomecaf
e!She
wai
tedf
ormet
ogoandwentt
omeet
herst
inki
ngaf
roman!
”
“
Howdoy
ouknowwher
eshewas”
“
Ijustknew”
“
Youar
ekeepi
ngt
apsonher
,isn’
tit
?”
“
It
’sf
orherpr
otect
ion”
“
Prot
ect
ionf
rom what
?”
“
Myenemi
es”
“
Isee,
doessheknow?
”
“
Shedoesn’
tneedt
oknow,
sheknows
whatki
ndofamanIam henceIhav
eto
makesur
ethatshe’
sal
way
ssaf
e!”
“
Whataboutt
hedaught
er,
arey
oual
so
keepi
ngt
absonhert
oo?
”
“
Yes”
“
Iheary
ouMrKhumal
o,howev
erI
bel
i
evey
oushoul
dhav
egav
ehera
chancet
oex
plai
n”
“
Sot
hatshecanl
i
etomeunt
ilIf
indher
onedayi
nmybedwi
thherl
overl
i
ke
Br
enda!
”
“
Youhav
emar
ri
edt
hiswomanf
orf
our
y
ear
snowKhumal
o,I
’
m sur
eyouknow
whenshe’
sly
ingandev
eni
fshe’
s
cheat
ingony
ou,
viol
encei
snott
heway
t
odeal
wit
hyourpai
nandanger
.It
old
y
oul
ear
ntocont
rol
youranger
.”Gui
l
t
washesov
ermeandIst
oppunchi
ngt
he
punchi
ngbag.
“
Doy
oust
il
lfeel
li
ket
urni
ngmygy
m
upsi
dedown?
”Ichuckl
eandshakemy
headno.I
’
m cal
m nowbutIf
eel
so
hor
ri
ble.Ev
ery
thi
ngi
scomi
ngbackt
o
menow,
theev
ent
sthatt
ranspi
red
mi
nut
esagoar
erepl
ayi
ngi
nmyhead
l
i
keamov
ie.Icoul
dn’
tcont
rol
mysel
fI
wassoangr
y,seei
ngherwi
thaman
mademeboi
lwi
thanger
.Ican’
tlose
Bonga.Thet
houghtofherl
eav
ingmei
s
unbear
abl
e.Ican’
tli
vewi
thoutherand
noonecant
akeherawayf
rom me.
She’
smi
neandmi
neal
onemakumel
e
kuf
einj
ayomuny
emf
azi
may
ife!

-
Icr
yunt
ilIr
unoutoft
ear
sandZost
il
l
hav
en’
tsai
dany
thi
ngbutcomf
ort
ingme.
Thewhol
eweekhedi
dn’
tbeatmeup,
I
t
houghtwear
eget
ti
ngsomewher
e.Thi
s
r
oadl
ookl
ongert
hanIant
ici
pat
ed.My
t
hroati
spai
nful
andmycheekbonei
s
t
hrobbi
ng.I
fZodi
dn’
tar
ri
veIwi
l
lbe
wor
set
hant
his.Ipul
lbackandwi
pemy
t
ear
s,shel
ooksatmewi
thsomuchpi
ty
i
nherey
esandget
sup.
“
Come”Shehol
dsoutherhandIt
akei
t
andgetup.Wewal
ktot
hecouchesand
Isi
tononeoft
hem whi
l
eshe
di
sappear
stot
heki
tchen.Mi
nut
esl
ate
she’
sbackwi
thi
cecubeswr
appedi
na
di
shcl
oth.Shesi
tsnex
ttomeand
pl
acesi
tonmycheekbone,
Iwi
ncei
n
pai
n
“
I’
m sor
ry”Shewhi
sper
sIcan’
tev
en
l
ookather
.I’
m soashamedandIknow
shecanseewhat
’sgoi
ng.Nowoman
wantt
hewor
ldt
oknowt
hather
husbandi
sabusi
ngher
.Wear
est
il
l
si
tt
ingi
nsi
l
enceandshe’
snur
singmy
cheekbonewi
thani
ce.Icani
magi
ne
howdoIl
ookl
i
keandmyl
i
ght
compl
exi
oni
snotdoi
ngmeanyj
ust
ice.
Shef
inal
l
ydeci
det
obr
eakt
hei
ce
“
Doy
ouhav
ehoney
?”
“
Yesi
t’
sint
hef
ri
dge”Myv
oicei
shoar
se
andmyt
hroati
sver
ypai
nful
and
scr
atchy
.
“
Her
etaket
his,
Iwi
l
lgomakey
ouat
ea
wi
thhoney
.It
’swi
l
lhel
pswi
thy
our
t
hroat
”InodasIt
aket
hedi
shcl
oth.She
get
supandwal
kst
otheki
tchenaf
tera
whi
l
eshecomesbackandgi
vesmemy
t
ea
“
Thanky
ou”Iputt
hedi
shcl
othont
he
cof
feet
abl
eandt
akemyt
ea
“
It
’smypl
easur
e”Shesay
ssi
tt
ingdown
andl
ooksatme.Ican’
tst
il
ll
ookather
i
ntheey
es.
“
Bonga”
“
Mmmh”
“
Lookatme”Isi
ponmyt
eawi
thout
l
ooki
ngather
.Sher
eleaseahugesi
gh
“
YouknowwhenmyhusbandandImetI
nev
ert
houghtonedaywewoul
dget
mar
ri
edandhav
echi
l
dren.Hewasa
t
ypi
cal
fuckboyandev
erygi
rl
’swi
shbut
Il
ovedhi
m somuch.Hewasmaki
ngi
t
easyf
ormet
olov
ehi
m mor
eandmor
e.
Hewast
wogr
adesseni
orandwhenhe
mat
ri
cul
atedandwentt
ouni
ver
sit
yI
t
houghtIhadl
osthi
m becausehewas
goi
ngt
otheci
tyandIwasst
il
lhav
eto
f
ini
shmymat
ri
c.Wewer
est
ayi
ngat
Skopal
l
en,
mont
hswentbywewer
est
il
l
i
nlov
ewi
theachot
her
.Hecal
l
edme
ev
erydayandhewoul
dcomeont
he
hol
i
day
sandwespentt
imet
oget
her
.I
r
emembert
hedayIl
ostmyv
irgi
nit
yhe
hadcomef
orf
est
ivehol
i
day
sandi
twas
myf
inal
yearatschool
.Thef
oll
owi
ng
y
earIwasgoi
ngt
oMendusaandIwas
happyt
hatwewoul
dseeeachot
her
mor
eof
tensi
ncehewasst
udy
ingat
Wi
ts.Sohewasbackf
orf
est
ive
hol
i
day
sandIsneakedoutatni
ght
,my
f
atherwasv
eryst
ri
cty
err
”Shechuckl
es
andpauseabi
tasi
fshe’
shav
inga
memor
yofsomet
hingi
nhermi
ndt
hen
shecont
inues
“
Theni
ghthebr
okemyv
irgi
nit
ytur
ned
outt
obet
hemostpai
nful
nightofmy
l
i
fe.Ourhousehadagr
assr
oofandy
ou
knowwheni
t’
swi
nterkushi
swaut
shani
,
wedon’
tknowhowt
hef
ir
est
art
edor
whost
art
edi
t.Whoev
ert
hatper
son
coul
dn’
tcont
rol
thef
ir
eandi
tescal
ated
unt
ili
treachmyf
ather
’swheat
sint
he
backy
ard.Thehousecaughtf
ir
eand
t
hathowt
heydi
ed.Iwasbey
ond
shat
ter
ed,
Ifel
tli
kemywor
ldwas
comi
ngt
oanend.Af
tert
hef
uner
alIhad
nowher
etogoandnoonewant
edt
o
st
aywi
thme.Ihadnooneex
ceptBheki
andmyhal
f-
brot
her
.Weonl
yshar
ethe
f
atherandhewasst
ayi
ngwi
thhi
smom.
Het
ri
edt
oaskhi
smom t
oal
l
owmet
o
st
aywi
tht
hem butt
hemot
herr
efused
becauseshebel
i
evedt
hatmom t
ookher
man.Bheki
wasav
erysuppor
ti
ve
boy
fri
endhei
ntr
oducedmet
ohi
sfami
l
y
hi
sfat
herwasni
ceandwel
comi
ngbut
hi
smot
herwasmean,
thatwomannev
er
l
ovedmef
rom t
hev
eryf
ir
stdayIdon’
t
knowwhy
.Wedi
dn’
tletany
thi
ngcome
bet
weenust
houghandIappr
eci
ated
t
hatnotonl
ydi
dheaccept
edmeashi
s
daught
erbuthepai
dformef
ees.Bheki
andIgotmar
ri
edwhenIf
all
pregnantat
t
heageof20andwewer
esohappyand
i
nlov
e.WhenIt
urned21,
Ifel
lpr
egnant
agai
n.YeahSi
mphi
weand
Lwandl
elwenkosi
areonl
yay
earapar
t”
Shegi
ggl
esandcar
ri
eson
“
That
’swhenhubbyboughtahouse,
he
waswor
kingathi
sfat
her
’scompany
.I
wassohappyt
ohav
emyownspace.
Hi
smot
herwassuf
focat
ingmeatt
imes.
Ev
ery
thi
ngwasokayandIf
inal
l
y
managet
ocompl
etemydoct
orat
eand
byt
hatt
imehehadhi
sownconst
ruct
ive
company
.Ist
art
edwor
kingat
Newcast
lePr
ovi
nci
alhospi
tal
,fewy
ear
s
l
aterf
ell
pregnantwi
thSno.Wewer
e
doi
nggr
eatunt
il4y
ear
sbackmyf
ather
i
nlawdi
edandt
hatbr
okeusbey
ond
especi
all
ymyhusband.Theywer
ever
y
cl
oseaf
teral
lhei
sthei
ronl
ychi
l
d.He
di
dn’
twantt
ofacet
hepai
nsohef
ound
sol
acei
nal
cohol
andf
ucki
nghoes.I
pr
ayedf
orhi
m mor
ethenIpr
ayedf
or
my
sel
f.Iwasl
osi
nghi
m eachpassi
ng
day
,someday
shenev
ercameback
home.Iwassobr
oken,
Idi
dn’
tknow
whatt
odobutmychi
l
drenkeptme
goi
ng.Ir
emembert
hisni
ghtSi
mphi
we
wasonaschool
tri
p,Iwaswi
thLwandl
e
andSnowhower
esl
eepi
ng.Aman
br
okei
ntoourhouse.Iwassot
err
if
ied
andIt
houghthewant
edmoneyonl
yto
f
oundouthewant
edt
omakeBheki
pay
f
orsl
eepi
ngwi
thhi
swi
fe.Hef
orced
hi
msel
fonmeIt
ri
edt
ofi
ghtbuthewas
t
oost
rongI
…”Shebl
i
nksbackhert
ear
s
butt
heyf
all
.Ipl
acet
hecupont
he
cof
feet
abl
eandpul
lhert
omyar
ms
“
Ial
l
owedhi
mtodowhat
evert
hat
pl
easeshi
m whatbr
okememor
ewas
seei
ngLwandl
ewi
tnessi
ngev
ery
thi
ng
t
hatwashappeni
ng.Hewascr
ying
BongaandI
…”Shebur
sti
ntot
ear
sandI
can’
thel
pmy
sel
fbutj
oinhersi
l
ent
ly
whi
l
est
roki
ngherback.Icanf
eel
her
pai
n,y
azy
ouwoul
dthi
nky
ouar
ethe
onl
yonewi
thpr
obl
emsonl
ytof
indout
peopl
ehav
ebeent
hroughsomuch
mor
e.Yout
rul
ycan’
tjudgeabookbyi
ts
cov
er,
thewayZoi
sbubbl
yandbeaut
if
ul
y
ouwoul
dthi
nkherl
i
fei
sper
fect
.
“
I’
m sor
ryZoIcan’
tev
eni
magi
newhat
y
ouwentt
hroughohgod.Di
dthe
bast
ardgot
ojai
l
?”Shenodswi
thher
head.Icomf
ortherunt
ilshecal
ms
down.Shepul
l
sbackandIwi
peher
t
ear
swi
thmypal
ms
“
I’
m sor
ry”
“
Heydon’
tbesor
ryZo”Sher
eleasesa
si
ghandsmi
l
esf
aint
ly
“
Wel
lyeshegotar
rest
ed,
he’
sst
il
li
njai
l
.
Somehowt
hathor
ri
bleor
deal
wasa
bl
essi
ngi
ndi
sgui
sebecausei
tbr
ought
backmyhusbandt
ohi
ssenses.I
coul
dn’
tbeart
ost
ayi
nthathouseagai
n
sowemov
edt
hissi
det
hatsamey
ear
.I
won’
tli
etoy
ouBonga,
Iwasangr
yatmy
husbandbutIl
ovehi
m somuchandI
coul
dn’
that
ehi
m.I
twashar
dbut
ev
ent
ual
l
yIf
orgav
ehi
m andwest
art
ed
hav
ingt
her
apysessi
onst
ofi
xthe
br
okenpi
ecesi
nourf
ami
l
y.Thi
sdi
dn’
t
af
fectourmar
ri
ageonl
yital
soaf
fect
ed
t
her
elat
ionshi
phehadwi
tht
heboy
s.As
t
imewentbyi
tgotbet
ter
,wepul
l
edi
t
t
hroughashar
dasi
twas.I
’
m nott
ell
i
ng
y
out
hisbecauseIwanty
out
ofeel
pit
y
f
ormeandt
ofeel
obl
i
gedt
oshar
eyour
si
deofst
orybutIwanty
out
oknowt
hat
y
ouar
enotal
one.I
’
m her
efory
ouandI
wi
l
lnev
erj
udgey
ou.
”
“
Thanky
ouZof
orshar
ingy
ourpai
nwi
th
me,
itmademer
eal
i
zet
hatweal
lhav
e
pr
obl
emsandt
hatonedayi
tshal
lpass.
”
“
Yeahsi
si,
itshal
l
”
“
Iwi
sht
hatcoul
dbesoonery
ouknow”I
t
comesoutasawhi
sperast
ear
srol
l
downmyey
es.Shewi
pest
hem wi
thher
t
humbs
“
Idon’
tknowhowwegother
e,
ev
ery
thi
ngwasokayt
henex
tmi
nut
e
her
ewear
e”It
ell
heraboutmyabusi
ve
mar
ri
age,
howi
taf
fect
ingmydaught
er
i
nthepr
ocessandhowscar
edIam t
o
l
eav
ebecauseIknowt
hathewoul
dfi
nd
meany
wher
e.Shesy
mpat
hiz
eswi
thme
andcomf
ort
sme.OnceI
’
m cal
m she
say
ssomet
hingIdi
dn’
tex
pect
“
Ican’
tleav
eyouher
eaf
terwhaty
ou
t
oldme.Let
’sgot
omyhouse”
“
I’
m goi
ngt
obef
ine”
“
NoBongawhati
fhecomesbackand
ki
l
lyou!
”
“
Hewi
l
lbecal
m whenhecomesback”
“
Youcan’
tbesur
eoft
hat
,let
’sgo.You
wi
l
lcomebackt
omor
row,
I’
m sur
ehe
woul
dbecal
m”
“
But
…”
“
Nobut
s,t
hismant
hinksy
ouar
e
cheat
ingy
oudon’
tknowwhathe’
s
t
hinki
ngr
ightnowBonga.
”She’
sri
ght
whati
fheki
l
lsmel
i
kehi
sex
-wi
fe,
phel
a
hehasnev
ercaughtmewi
thaman
bef
orel
i
ket
oday
.
“
AndMi
ra?
”
“
‘I
’m sur
eMi
rai
sathomewi
thmyson
y
oucanj
ustpackherov
erni
ghtbagt
oo”
Inodandgetup,
headi
ngt
omy
bedr
oom.Ipackf
ewt
hingst
hengot
o
Mi
ra’
sroom andpackhercl
othest
oo.
OnceI
’
m donepacki
ng,
Iwashmyf
ace
andputonsomemakeupt
henwal
kto
l
i
vingr
oom.
“
I’
m done”Sheget
supandwewal
kout
.
Il
ockt
hedoorf
ir
stt
henwel
eav
e.I
knowt
hathewoul
dknowwher
etof
ind
mej
ustl
i
keheal
way
sknewmy
wher
eabout
sbutIknowhewoul
dnot
causeascenei
nanot
herman’
shouse.
-

Ihav
enev
erbeenasembar
rassedasI
am r
ightnow.Thi
schi
l
dissomet
hing
el
sehowcanshet
ell
onusl
i
ket
hatand
wor
seshe’
sev
enmi
micki
ngusand
ex
plai
ningev
ery
thi
ngwewer
edoi
ng.
NowIwantt
odi
e,Lor
dpl
easet
akeme.
“
Musaukuphaphawena!
”Say
s
Lwenkosi
wit
hannoy
ancei
nhi
svoi
ce
“
Whatwer
etheydoi
ngmommy
?”
“
Looksweet
hear
tyouwer
enot
supposedt
obar
gei
nyourbr
other
’s
r
oom,
youknowt
hatmos”
“
Yesmommy
”
“
Nowapol
ogi
zet
ohi
m”
“
I’
m sor
rybut
i,Ishoul
dhav
eknocked”
“
It
’sokaymunchki
n”
”
Snogot
othel
i
vingIwi
l
lbr
ingy
ou
somet
hingt
oeat
”
“
Okaymommy
”Thewaymymom i
s
qui
etev
ersi
nceSnost
art
edex
plai
ning
whatwewer
edoi
ngi
swor
ryi
ngme
“
Youwer
ehav
ingsexi
nmyhousewhi
l
e
t
hechi
l
dwasher
e,r
eal
l
y!!
”Shout
s
Lwandl
elwenkosi
’
sMom.Iwon’
tsaya
wor
dIwi
l
lletLwenkosi
deal
wit
hhi
s
mom andIwoul
ddeal
wit
hmi
ne
becausenowi
t’
saboutt
ogodown.
“
I’
m sor
ryMama”Lwenkosi
say
s
“
Whatar
eyout
wot
eachi
ngt
hechi
l
d
huh!
??”
“
Sheshoul
dhav
eknockedt
hough
Mama”
“
Hey
idon’
tyoudar
etel
lmet
hat
!Youar
e
notev
ensupposedt
ohav
esexi
nmy
houseLwandl
elwenkosi
!Khonamanj
e
y
ouj
ustmadeagi
rlpr
egnant
!It
hought
y
oul
ear
nty
ourl
esson!
”
“
Ofcour
seIhav
e,I
’
mreal
l
ysor
ryInev
er
meantt
odi
srespecty
ou”
“
CanIspeakt
omydaught
erpr
ivat
ely
?”
Say
sMama.
“
Okaynopr
obl
em.Wenaasambe!
”(You
l
et’
sgo)Iheart
hem shuf
fl
ingaway
.
“
Sincewhennowdoy
ousneakoutnow
huh?I
sthi
sther
easony
ouwer
e
sneaki
ngoutt
ocomeher
eandhav
esex
i
nfr
ontofachi
l
d!!
?”Okayshe’
sangr
y
andIunder
stand.
“
Nomommy
,I’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
ttel
lyouI
knewy
ouwoul
dno…”
“
Doest
hatgi
vey
ouar
ightt
ogowi
thout
myper
missi
onhuh!
!”
“
NoMama”
“
Youwantt
ofal
lpr
egnantl
i
ket
hatgi
rl
hei
mpr
egnat
ed!
!”Ishakemyheadnoas
t
ear
smakedownt
hei
rwaydownmy
f
ace
“
Don’
tyoudar
ecr
yMi
ra!Iwi
l
lwi
pe
t
hoset
ear
swi
thahugesl
ap!I
’
mtoo
sof
tony
ouhencey
ouar
edoi
ngasy
ou
pl
ease!Ihav
enev
err
efusedy
ouseei
ng
Lwandl
elwenkosi
buty
ouknowwhyI
woul
dn’
thav
eal
l
owedy
ou!
”
“
Ngi
yamt
handamama”(
Ilov
ehi
m
mama)Icr
y
“
Hegott
oomuchbaggagef
ory
ou
Mi
ra!
!”
“
Ilov
ehi
m wi
thhi
sbaggagey
oushoul
d
knowbet
tersi
ncey
oul
ovedadwi
th
abusi
vebehav
io…”Bef
oreIev
enf
ini
sh
mysent
enceIf
eel
ahotst
ingi
ng
sensat
iont
hatsendsmest
rai
ghtt
othe
f
loorasi
tcaughtmebysur
pri
se.I
scr
eam i
nagony
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”Say
sLwenkosi
mom’
sasshet
ryt
opi
ckmeupont
he
f
loor
.
“
BabyI
’
m sor
ry”Mom say
swi
thacr
ying
v
oiceasshet
ri
est
otouchmebutIy
ank
herhandaway
.
“
Youseey
ouar
ebecomi
ngl
i
kehi
m
MamaandIhat
ehi
mfort
hat
.Isohat
e
hi
m!!
!”
“
Comesi
slet
’sgot
omybedr
oom ”
Lwenkosi
’
smom say
saswewal
kher
bedr
oom.Oncewear
ether
ewecl
i
mb
ont
hebedandshepul
l
smet
oherchest
.
“
Shhdon’
tcr
ybabyy
ourmom i
str
ying
t
opr
otecty
ou.
”
“
Iknowmamabutsomet
imesi
t’
sfeel
s
l
i
keshedoesn’
tcar
eaboutmyf
eel
i
ngs”
“
Shecar
essi
ssher
eal
l
ydoesi
t’
snot
easyonhery
ouknow.Iunder
standher
concer
nsshe’
sjustbei
ngamot
her
.I
don’
tbl
ameher
,Lwandl
elwenkosi
ismy
sonandIl
ovehi
m somuchbuthe’
s
goi
ngt
obeaf
athernow.That
’st
oo
muchy
ouar
ebot
hyoungf
oral
loft
his
unf
ort
unat
elyf
orhi
mther
e’snot
hinghe
candobutt
aker
esponsi
bil
i
ty.Youon
t
heot
hersi
dey
oudon’
thav
etocar
ryal
l
t
hisbaggagewi
thhi
m.Youcanset
y
our
sel
ffr
ee”
“
ButIwantt
ocar
ryhi
sbaggagewi
th
hi
m.Il
ovehi
m mamaIl
ovehi
m so
much.Ngi
vumel
eni
ngi
wut
hwal
e
l
omt
hwal
ongi
hlul
ekeke”Shesi
ghs
“
It
’sokaysi
si,
Iheary
ou.Let
’smego
t
alkwi
thy
ourmot
hercome.
”Shehel
ps
meoutoft
hebedandwewal
kout
.Isi
t
ont
hel
i
vingr
oom wi
thSnowhi
l
emom
andMr
sNkosi
tal
kint
heki
tchen.Idon’
t
knowwher
eLwenkosi
hasdi
sappear
ed
t
o.Mi
nut
esl
ater
,mom comest
omeand
Mr
sNkosi
takesSnowi
thher
.
“
Baby
”Shet
akesmyhandi
ntoher
s
“
I’
m sor
ryf
orsl
appi
ngy
ou,
itwasn’
tmy
i
ntent
ion.Iwantt
oapol
ogi
ze.
”
“
I’
m sor
ryf
ordi
srespect
ingy
ou”
“
Ilov
eyouMi
rasomuchandIwanty
ou
t
obehappy
.I’
mjustwor
ri
edy
ouknow
asamot
hershoul
dbe.Idon’
twanty
ou
t
ogethur
tsweet
hear
t.Whent
her
e’sa
chi
l
dinv
olv
ed,
ther
e’st
oomuch
hear
tbr
eakandIdon’
twanty
out
obe
hear
tbr
oken.Ar
eyouawar
ewhaty
ou
ar
eget
ti
ngy
our
sel
fint
o?Ther
ewi
l
lbe
t
imeswher
eLwandl
ehast
obet
her
efor
hi
sbabymamaandbesuppor
ti
ve.Ar
e
y
ouawar
ethathi
schi
l
dwi
l
lal
way
s
comef
ir
stt
ohi
m?Theset
wowi
l
lal
way
s
bei
neachot
her
’sl
i
fey
oucannev
er
separ
atet
hem.Howsur
ear
eyout
hat
i
t’
sov
erbet
weent
het
wooft
hem?
”I
t
hinkIam butIwon’
tli
eit
’sf
reaki
ngme
out
“
Ithi
nkIam awar
emamaandLwenkosi
pr
omi
sedmet
hatt
her
e’snot
hingmor
e
goi
ngonbet
weent
het
wooft
hem andI
t
rusthi
m mama”Sheheav
esasi
gh
“
Youseemybabyr
elat
ionshi
pswher
ea
chi
l
disi
nvol
vedar
ever
ycompl
i
cat
ed.I
heart
haty
out
rustLwandl
elwenkosi
but
doy
out
rustt
hisgi
rl
?”Okaynowt
hat
’sa
pr
obl
em
“
Whati
fshewant
shi
m back?Shecoul
d
doany
thi
ngt
ohav
ehi
m backbabyar
e
y
our
eal
l
ythatst
rongandbr
avet
oface
t
hosechal
l
enges.Lwandl
elwenkosi
isa
handsomeboyandIr
eal
l
ydobel
i
eve
t
hathel
ovesy
ou.Iseet
hewayhel
ooks
aty
oubutatt
heendoft
hedayhe’
sa
boy
.Boy
sgeteasi
l
ytempt
edbaby
”Oh
Godt
hiswomani
smaki
ngmymi
nd
spi
nsnow.
“
I’
m nott
ryi
ngt
oscar
eyoubutIwant
y
out
obeal
ertwi
thev
ery
thi
ngt
hat
mi
ghthappen”
“
Iheary
oumamaandt
hanky
ouf
or
enl
i
ght
eni
ngmewi
tht
hepossi
bil
i
tiesof
myr
elat
ionshi
pwi
thLwenkosi
.Not
hing
comeseasyr
ight
?Ibel
i
evewewi
l
lpul
l
t
hroughev
ery
thi
ngt
hatwi
l
lhappenso
pl
easemommyj
ustgi
vemeachance.I
knowy
ouar
epr
otect
ingmebut
somet
imest
her
ear
esomet
hingst
hat
I
’
m boundt
ofacesot
hatIcangr
owand
l
ear
nli
fe’
slessons”
“
Mmmhsomeonei
sgr
owi
ngal
ready
”
Shet
ickl
esmeIgi
ggl
e
“
Youar
eri
ghtmybaby
,Ican’
tpr
otect
y
ouf
orev
er.Ihav
etol
ety
ougr
ow,
make
y
ourownmi
stakesbutj
ustknowt
hat
mommyl
ovesy
ouandsheal
way
sgot
y
ourback”Ican’
thel
pbutsmi
l
e.Il
ove
t
hiswoman.
“
Ilov
eyout
oomommyandIr
eal
l
y
appr
eci
ateev
ery
thi
ngy
ouhav
edonef
or
me.Youar
etr
ulyt
hebestmommyi
nthe
whol
ewor
ld”
“
Ohbabyt
hanky
ou”Shesqueez
esme
i
nherar
ms
“
Ican’
tbr
eat
hewoman!
”Wel
aughas
shel
etsgoofme
“
Whyar
eyouher
e?”
“
Wear
espendi
ngt
heni
ghther
e”
“
Why
”
“Zoi
nvi
tedus”
“
Youseem t
oli
keher
,I’
m gl
ad”
“
She’
sani
ceper
son”
“
‘May
bet
heycanhel
pusescapemom”
“
Hay
iMi
raIt
oldy
out
onott
ell
any
one
aboutt
his”
“
Idi
dn’
ttel
lany
onemommy
”Il
i
eof
cour
seIhav
ebecomeaf
requentl
i
ar
l
atel
y
“
Lwenkosi
tol
dmet
her
e’sasi
ngi
ng
compet
it
ionmay
bei
fIwi
nwecan
escapeandgot
owher
edadcannev
er
f
indus.50ki
snotal
otofmoneybuti
t
cangetoutusofher
e”
“
Mir
apl
ease,
wet
alkedaboutt
his.That
y
ouwoul
dletmedot
hismyway
”Ihuf
f
“
Let
’st
alkabouty
ouand
wandl
elwenkosi
.Di
dyouusepr
otect
ion
becauseI
’
m sonotr
eadyt
obea
gr
andmot
her
?”
“
Wedi
dn’
thav
esexmom,
wel
li
twas
or
alsex
”
“
Youar
enotr
eadyf
orsexmybaby
”Is
t
hiswomanf
orr
eal
aft
err
ubbi
ng
hi
msel
fonmel
i
ket
hatIwantmor
e!
“
Oh”
“
Ohi
sthatal
lyougoi
ngt
osay
?”
“
Whatdoy
ouwantmet
osaymom?
”
“
Iwanty
out
oagr
eewi
thme”Igi
ggl
e,
usi
l
elomf
azi
yazshewantal
ltheni
ce
t
hingsf
orher
sel
fonl
y.
“
Ilov
eyoumom nehbutont
hisoney
ou
ar
eony
ourown”
“
GoshI
’
m goi
ngt
oki
l
lLwandl
e,he’
s
cor
rupt
ingy
ou”Wel
augh
“
Looksweet
hear
tifi
twasf
orme.You
wi
l
lwai
tunt
ily
ougetmar
ri
ed”
.
“
Whati
fIdon’
twantt
ogetmar
ri
ed?
”
“
Andwhywoul
dyounotwantt
oget
mar
ri
ed”
“
Nje”(
just
)shel
aughs
“
Hai
sukawenanj
eusuf
unai
pipi
nje!
”
(
Youj
ustwantt
hedi
ck)
“
Maaa!
”Shel
aughs
“
Whatv
eleuy
ali
funamossy
ouwer
e
beggi
ngLwandl
elwenkosi
toputi
tin”I
gi
ggl
eshy
ly
“
Ican’
tst
opy
oubecausey
ouhav
e
al
readyst
art
edwi
thsex
ual
act
ivi
ti
esso
whatIwoul
dadv
isey
oui
stouse
condomsMi
ra.Youar
est
il
lyoungt
o
hav
eababynowandt
her
e’sst
il
lal
ot
y
ouhav
etoaccompl
i
shf
ir
st.
”Inod
“
Heeemododay
ouwer
eababyj
ust
y
est
erdayandt
odayy
ouar
ecr
yingl
i
kea
hy
enabeggi
ngf
oradi
ckt
hix
oonof
efe!
”
“
Mom!
”Shel
aughs
Af
terourt
alkIj
oinedLwenkosi
andSno
byt
hepool
whi
l
ethemomswer
einsi
de
doi
ngwhat
evert
heywer
edoi
ng,
Lwenkosi
’
smom woul
dmakeagood
f
ri
endt
omamanott
hatAunt
yNomai
s
badf
ri
end,
it’
sjustt
hatshe’
stoomuch
somet
imes.
I
t’
s7pm andwear
eal
lgat
her
edar
ound
t
het
abl
ehav
ingdi
nnerov
erwar
m
chat
ter
.Mymom i
sagoodcookbut
Lwenkosi
’
smom i
sthebest
.Imustsay
hangi
ngoutwi
tht
heNkosi
sis
r
efr
eshi
ng.Wehearabuz
zer
“
Expect
ingsomeone?
”AsksLwenkosi
’
s
mom
”
No”Ev
ery
onesayi
nuni
son
“
Iwi
l
lgeti
t”Say
sthemanoft
hehouse,
f
ewsecondsl
aterhecomesbackaswe
wai
tinant
ici
pat
ion
“
Nandi
whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e”asks
Lwenkosi
andNandi
bur
sti
ntoal
oud
cr
y
“
I’
m soscar
edmygr
andmawas
admi
tt
edt
odayandI
nnocentdi
dn’
t
comebacky
est
erdayf
rom wor
kIdon’
t
knowwhathappenedt
ohi
m hehas
nev
erdonet
hatbef
ore”
“
Whoar
eyouy
oungl
ady
?”Asks
Lwandl
elwenkosi
’
sfat
herhai
bokant
ihe
doesn’
tknowaboutt
hepr
egnancy
.
“
Iwasgoi
ngt
otel
lyoudar
li
ngt
oni
ght
Nandi
ispr
egnantwi
thLwenkosi
chi
l
d”
“
Whaaat
!!
”
“
Ineedy
out
ocal
m downokay
”
“
Cal
m down!
!thi
sboyf
ucksar
oundand
i
mpr
egnat
esgi
rl
sandy
out
ell
met
o
cal
m down!
!”
“
It
’snotmom’
sfaul
tdad…”
“
I’
m nott
alki
ngt
oyou!Whoasky
out
o
speak!
!Justbecausey
ougoar
oundand
i
mpr
egnat
inggi
rl
syout
hinky
ouar
ea
mannow!
!Lal
elakendoday
amadoda
y
ouar
egoi
ngt
oqui
tatAFDAandf
ind
j
obsot
haty
oucant
akecar
eofy
our
baby
!”
“
AwkodwaMpangaz
ithat
hat
’st
oo
har
sh”Hi
smom say
str
yingt
ocal
m
downherhusbandbuthei
snotbar
ging
“
Zol
ekat
hisboywi
l
lnev
erl
ear
ntot
ake
r
esponsi
bil
i
tyi
fyougoi
ngt
ospoi
lhi
m
l
i
ket
his!Hemakebabesr
ighthemust
gohust
lef
orhi
sbaby
!!
”
“
ButIcanwor
konweekendsdad…”
“
Weekendmyf
oot
!That
’snotgoi
ngt
o
happen!Ki
ssy
ourcar
eergoodby
e
sphukuphukundi
niangaz
ifuz
ebani
!”
“
Vel
eangi
funi
njeukuf
uzawena!
”
“
I’
m st
il
lyourf
ather
,don’
tyoudar
etal
k
t
omel
i
keI
’
myourf
ri
end!
”
“
Myf
atherdi
edt
hedayhe.
..
.”Isqueez
e
hi
shandundert
het
abl
etost
ophi
m.
“
Nx!
”Heget
sup
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
Tomybedr
oom”Whydi
dNandi
come
her
eandspoi
lourmomentar
gthi
sgi
rl
nx
!We’
veal
ll
ostappet
it
eaf
tert
hat
ar
gumentex
ceptNandi
whogl
adl
y
acceptt
hef
oodaf
terMr
sNkosi
has
of
fer
ed.Mr
sNkosi
showust
her
ooms
wewi
l
luse.I
t’
ssaf
etosayI
m abi
t
f
ami
l
iarwi
tht
hishousenow.Mov
ing
ar
oundi
t’
sget
ti
ngmor
eandmor
eeasy
ev
eryt
imeIcomeher
e.I
’
m sl
eepi
ng
wi
thmom andNandi
issl
eepi
ngi
nsome
oft
heguestr
ooms.I
’
mtr
yingt
osl
eep
buti
t’
shar
d,whati
fthi
sgi
rlsneaki
nto
Lwandl
elwenkosi
’
sroom.Mom i
s
hol
dingmet
ight
lyl
i
keI
’
m goi
ngt
orun
away
.Iwai
tforherunt
ilIhearher
snor
ingl
i
ght
lyandIunwr
apherar
m
ar
oundmywai
stsl
owl
yandr
oll
outof
bedt
henf
iddl
eformuf
fi
n.It
ipt
oesl
owl
y
andunt
ilImanaget
ogett
othedoorj
ust
whenIt
urnt
hehandl
eIhearherv
oice
“
Uyaphi
?”(
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng)
“
Uhm.
.uh.
.I
”Ist
utt
er,
shechuckl
es
”
Woz
asi
l
ale”(
comet
obedandl
et’
s
sl
eep)Goshwhyi
sshenotsl
eepi
ng
kant
ihay
i!
CHAPTER18

Ist
areatt
hisy
oungf
emal
ever
sionof
myf
athernex
ttome.Ihav
enev
erseen
achi
l
dthat
’sl
ookl
i
ket
hegr
andpaas
mydaught
er.Onewoul
dthi
nkshe’
shi
s
daught
er.Idon’
tknowwhatt
heman
abov
ewast
ryi
ngt
odoher
e.Nomat
ter
howIt
ryt
ofor
gett
hatman,
itpr
ovest
o
bet
hemi
ssi
onbecauseIhav
eay
oung
f
emal
ever
sionofhi
m asmydaught
er.
Regar
dlessIl
ovemydaught
ert
hough
she’
stheonet
hingIev
ergotr
ight
.I
chuckl
easIt
hinkofl
astni
ghtwhenI
caughthersneaki
ngout
.She’
s
becomi
ngsneakyt
heseday
s,t
hisboyi
s
dr
ivi
nghercr
azyandI
’
m st
il
lnotsur
e
aboutt
hei
rrel
ati
onshi
pespeci
all
yaf
ter
t
hatgi
rlj
ustbar
gedi
nannouncedbutI
pr
omi
sedhert
hatI
’
lll
ethermakeher
ownmi
stakes.

It
akemyphonef
rom t
hebedsi
det
abl
e
andswi
tchi
ton.Iswi
tchedi
tof
f
y
est
erdaybecauseKhumal
owoul
dcal
l
me,
honest
lyI
’
m sur
pri
sedhedi
dn’
t
f
etchusbecauseIknowt
hatheknows
t
hatwear
eher
e.Ihopewewi
l
lfi
ndhi
m
cal
mtoday
.Tonsofmessagesf
loodsi
n
andt
heyar
efr
om hi
m.Il
i
stent
ohi
s
v
oicemessages“
BongaI
’
m sor
ry
st
handwasami
,pl
easef
orgi
veme.I
’
m
t
rul
ysor
ry”Idel
etet
heot
her
swi
thout
l
i
steni
ng.He’
ssoundi
ngl
i
kescr
atched
r
ecor
dnowandi
t’
sannoy
ing.Iswi
tched
i
tof
fagai
nandki
ssmydaught
er,
who’
s
peacef
ull
ysl
eepi
ngonherf
oreheadand
getup.Iwearmyr
obeandsl
i
dei
nmy
sl
i
pper
sbef
oregoi
ngt
othebat
hroom.I
t
akeal
ongwel
ldeser
vedshower
.Once
I
’
m doneIwal
kbackt
obedr
oom t
o
l
oti
onmybodyandgetdr
essed.Imake
mywayt
otheki
tchenandf
indZo
maki
ngbr
eakf
ast
.

“
Mor
ning”
“
Mor
ningsi
showar
eyou”
“
I’
m wel
lthanksandy
ou?
”
“
Youdon’
thav
etopr
etendBonga,
pl
easel
etmei
n”Isi
gh
“
I’
m ex
haust
edemot
ional
l
y,phy
sical
l
y
andspi
ri
tual
l
yhonest
ly”
“
OhBonga”Shewi
pesherhandswi
tha
di
shcl
othandhugsme
“
Sitdown,
Iwi
l
lmakey
out
ea”
“
Not
ell
mewhatIcanhel
pyouwi
th.
”
“
Youdon’
thav
eto”
“
Wel
lIi
nsi
st,
justt
othanky
ouf
or
al
l
owi
ngust
osl
eepher
e”
“
It
’sokaysi
s”Ihel
pherwi
thbr
eakf
ast
whi
l
ewet
alk.
“
LookI
’
m nott
ryi
ngt
otel
lyouwhatt
o
doorj
udgi
ngy
oubutIt
hinki
t’
sti
mey
ou
l
eav
eBonga.I
t’
sbeent
woy
ear
snow
onedayhewi
l
lki
l
lyouwhatwoul
d
happenedt
oMi
ra”
“
He’
sget
ti
nghel
pZo”
“
Thesamehel
pthathest
art
edaweek
agobuthest
il
lbeaty
ouup?I
tlooksl
i
ke
hedoesn’
twantt
ochange.Idon’
tthi
nk
he’
sgoi
ngf
ort
her
apy
.Howl
ongar
eyou
goi
ngt
oendur
ethi
spai
nsi
si”
“
Wher
ewi
l
lwegoZo,
Ican’
ttakeaway
t
heonl
yhomeMi
raknowsandf
eel
s
comf
ort
abl
ein.Khumal
oisgi
vi
ngher
ev
ery
thi
ngIcoul
dnev
eraf
for
d.Yazmy
daught
eri
sbl
i
ndbutshe’
sleadi
nga
nor
mal
li
fel
i
keasi
ght
edper
sonal
l
becauseofKhumal
o.Shewasnev
era
happychi
l
dunt
ilshecameher
e.St
art
ing
anewl
i
fewoul
dsetherback.
”She
si
ghs
“
Iheary
ousi
smay
bet
hepol
i
cecan
hel
p.Hewi
l
lgot
ojai
landy
ouandMi
ra
wi
l
lhav
ethehouset
oyour
sel
f”Il
augh
“
Doy
ouknowmyhusband?
”Shel
ooks
atmebl
ankl
y
“
He’
sagangl
ord,
hewi
l
lnev
erst
ayev
en
ami
nut
einj
ail
.Hehasev
ery
oneonhi
s
pay
rol
l
”
“
TjooBongat
hisi
sdeepmos.Youonl
y
hav
eoneopt
iont
hent
oescapet
he
count
ry.
..
yes!Mybr
othercanhel
pyou
wi
thf
akev
isaandpasspor
ts.Iwi
l
ltal
k
t
omyhusbandandwecanhel
pyouwi
th
capi
tal
tost
artanewl
i
fe”
“
Moneyi
snotapr
obl
em t
hepr
obl
em i
s
hewi
l
lfi
nduswher
everwecangoand
hewi
l
lki
l
lusbot
hZol
eka.Hewi
l
lknow
t
haty
ouguy
shel
pedusandki
l
lal
lof
y
ou.Idon’
twantt
oputy
ourf
ami
l
yin
danger
”Icr
y
“
Not
her
emustbesomet
hingt
hatwe
cando,
ther
ehast
obe,
wecan’
tjustsi
t
anddonot
hingIr
efuse!
”Shepul
l
smei
n
herar
ms.OnceI
’
m cal
m downwe
cont
inuemaki
ngbr
eakf
ast
.
“
Wher
e’sy
ourf
ami
l
y”
“
Dumbe,
don’
tev
ent
hinkaboutt
hem.
Dadki
ckmeoutl
i
keadogwhenIwas
onl
y23y
ear
sol
dandmymom di
dn’
tdo
any
thi
ng”
“
That
’scr
uel
butwhy
”It
ell
herhal
f-
tr
uth.
“
OhhhmyBongay
ouhav
ebeent
hrough
al
ot.Wher
e’sMi
ra’
sfat
her
?Hewas
supposedt
otaker
esponsi
bil
i
ty”Icl
ear
myt
hroatandshenot
icest
hatIdon’
t
wantt
otal
kaboutt
hatsowechange
t
het
opi
c
“
Sov
eleLwandl
elwenkosi
isqui
tt
ing
school
?”
“
Idon’
tknowwhat
’swr
ongwi
tht
hat
man,
he’
sfat
herwasv
erysuppor
ti
vet
o
hi
m.Henev
ert
reat
edhi
mli
kehet
reat
s
Lwandl
elwenkosi
.Iunder
standLwandl
e
madeami
stakebutt
oqui
tschool
is
ov
erboar
d.”
“
He’
sangr
yanddi
sappoi
ntedgi
vehi
m
t
ime”
“
He’
shar
dheaded,
Ihav
etot
rysome
newbedr
oom t
ipst
omakehi
m st
opt
his
nonsense”Wegi
ggl
e
“
Wel
lgoodl
uck”
“
Thanky
ou,
I’
m sogoi
ngt
oneedi
t”By
t
het
imewef
ini
shev
ery
onei
sawake.
Wehav
ebr
eakf
astt
oget
herov
erwar
m
conv
ersat
ion.Theyar
equi
teal
ovi
ng
f
ami
l
y.Whenwef
ini
shwel
eav
efor
chur
chwel
lchur
chesar
enotmyt
hings
butIcoul
dn’
tsaynowhenZoaskedus
t
ojoi
nthem.Icanseet
hatMi
rai
sal
so
notcomf
ort
abl
ebutshe’
sgoi
ngt
obe
okay
.Wehav
eagr
eatser
vicebutMi
ra
i
sbor
edt
othecor
ethatshekeeps
doz
ingof
f,t
hischi
l
disembar
rassi
ngme.
Af
terser
viceZodr
ivesushome.
“
Thanky
ousomuchZo”
“
Any
timeBonga,
cal
lmei
fsomet
hing
happensokay
”Inodweshar
eahug.
“
ByeMi
ra”
By
eMama”Theyhugt
henshel
eav
es.I
t
akeahugesi
ghandhol
dmydaught
er
aswemakeourwayi
n.I
’
m scar
edbut
f
orMi
ranotf
orme.Themomentwear
e
i
n,hesqueez
esusi
nhi
sar
ms
”
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ngbackz
ithandwa
z
ami
”Ipushhi
m,t
odayI
’
m notgoi
ngt
o
f
orgi
vehi
m easi
l
y.Uj
way
eleumkhuba
omubi
uKhumal
oukut
hiwhenev
erhe
sayhe’
ssor
ry,
Iwoul
dfor
giv
ehi
m.I
fhe
wantt
oki
l
lusbecauseoft
hathemi
ght
aswel
ldoi
t.
“
Canwet
alk,
please?
”
“
Iknowy
ouwantt
oapol
ogi
zesomy
r
esponsei
sokayIf
orgi
vey
ou”Iwal
k
awaywi
thMi
ral
eav
inghi
m st
andi
ng
t
her
e.Iunpackourcl
othesaf
tert
hatI
spendt
her
estoft
heSundaywat
chi
ng
Net
fl
ixwi
thmydaught
erandst
uff
ing
our
sel
veswi
thj
unk.Khumal
ocal
l
sus
f
ordi
nnerandweeatov
eranawkwar
d
t
ensi
on.Icanseet
hathef
eel
sdef
eat
ed
andr
emor
sef
ulbutwhatdi
ff
erentdoes
i
tmake.
Day
spassbyandI
’
m st
il
lnotgi
vi
nghi
m
at
tent
ionandIsl
eepwi
thmydaught
er.
Hebuy
sgi
ft
s,cookf
orus,
beggi
ngme
t
ofor
giv
ehi
m.Idi
dn’
tknowhowgoodi
t
f
eel
sli
ket
oseehi
mli
ket
his.Hehas
t
urnoneoft
heguestr
oomst
oagy
m.
That
’swher
ehespendsmostofhi
sti
me,
punchi
ngt
hepunchi
ngbag.Twof
ull
weekspassedwet
alkedy
est
erdayandI
t
oldhi
mthewhol
etr
uthandhedi
dn’
t
j
udgemel
i
keIt
houghthewoul
d.He’
s
v
erysuppor
ti
veandhehasn’
tbeat
enme
upi
nthesef
ull
twoweeks,
that
’sabi
g
i
mpr
ovement
.

He’
sst
il
lgoi
ngf
ort
her
apyher
eal
l
ywant
t
ochangeandI
’
m gl
adhe’
scommi
tt
ing
hi
msel
fint
heset
her
apysessi
ons.Zo
cal
l
smeev
erydayt
ocheckonusand
someday
swespentt
imet
oget
her
,if
she’
snotwor
king.It
hinki
t’
ssaf
etosay
If
oundasi
sterkuZoshe’
str
uly
amaz
ing.Mi
rai
sokay
,shehasmoods
f
orday
sI’
mtel
l
ingy
oubutI
’
m gl
adshe
choset
oent
ert
hecompet
it
ion.
Lwandl
elwenkosi
isr
eal
l
yagood
i
nfl
uencei
nherl
i
fedespi
tet
hebaggage
hehas.

Myhusbandl
eftear
lyf
orwor
ktodayhe
di
dn’
teathi
sbr
eakf
asthehadanear
ly
meet
ingsoIhav
edeci
dedt
obr
inghi
m
l
unchathi
swor
kpl
ace.ThemomentI
wal
kinhi
sof
fi
cehedev
our
smyl
i
ps
bef
oreIknowi
tI’
m bentov
erandhe’
s
hi
tt
ingi
tfr
om behi
nd.Imi
sst
hef
eel
of
hi
minsi
deofme,
twoweeksf
eel
sli
ke
i
t’
sbeeny
ear
s

“
Y’al
lar
edi
smi
ssed”ThanksGod,
atl
ast
Ihav
ebeenwai
ti
ngf
ort
heendofmy
l
astl
ect
uref
ort
hedaynott
hatIwas
concent
rat
ing.I
t’
sal
lbecauseofMi
ra
gosht
hisgi
rlwi
l
lbet
hedeat
hofme.
She’
spl
ast
eredi
nmymi
ndl
i
keagl
ue.I
wi
shshecoul
dbewi
thmeal
lthe
f
ucki
ngt
ime,
it’
scr
azyIknow.Idon’
t
under
standhowaper
soncanhav
eso
muchef
fectonanot
herper
son’
sli
fe
wi
thi
nashor
tspaceoft
ime.I
t’
sal
most
amont
hnowsi
ncewehav
ebeendat
ing,
myl
ovef
orherkeepsgr
owi
ngev
eryday
.
WhenI
’
m wi
thhert
hewor
ldf
reez
es
ar
oundmeandt
hecl
ockst
opt
icki
ng.
Herl
ovel
i
ght
supmyhear
tandgi
ves
peacet
omysoul
.It
’st
hemostbeaut
if
ul
anddi
vi
nef
eel
i
ngIhav
eev
erf
elti
nmy
ent
ir
eli
fe.

I
t’
sbeent
woweekssi
nceNandi
bar
ged
i
nmypar
ent
’shouseuni
nvi
ted.Tobe
honestwi
thy
ouIwaspi
ssedl
i
kewhat
t
hehel
l
?Howi
sitmypr
obl
em t
hather
br
otherwentawol
andhergr
andmot
her
i
sinhospi
tal
.I’
mresponsi
blef
ort
he
babyshe’
scar
ryi
ngonl
y.I
tir
kst
hehel
l
outofmet
hatshe’
sst
ayi
ngwi
thusnow
andt
hisi
scausi
ngf
requentf
ight
s
bet
weenmeandmyDol
l
face.Wel
l
Nandi
’
sgr
andmai
sst
il
li
nhospi
tal
and
I
nnocenthasnev
err
etur
nedhome.I
’
m
qui
tewor
ri
edabouthi
mthat
’snotl
i
ke
hi
m.I
nnocentmaybeanassandal
lfor
whathedi
dtomyDol
l
facebuthe’
sa
goodbr
otherandagoodgr
andson.He
woul
dnev
erj
ustdi
sappearonhi
ssi
ster
andgr
andma.Theyar
enot
hingwi
thout
hi
m,I
’
m wonder
ingwhathappenedt
o
hi
m ormay
behet
houghtMi
rawi
l
lrepor
t
hi
mtot
hepol
i
ceanddeci
dedt
orun
awayorhi
de.

Iwi
shhecoul
dcomebacksot
hatNandi
cangobackhome.I
’
mti
redoff
ight
ing
wi
thmyDol
l
faceandIunder
standher
f
rust
rat
ions.I
t’
snoteasyf
orhert
oknow
t
hatI
’
mli
vi
ngundert
hesamer
oofwi
th
mypr
egnantexgi
rl
fr
iend.Ther
e’smy
f
atheront
heot
herhand,
who’
sal
way
s
onmycase“
Youcan’
tlett
hemot
herof
y
ourunbor
nchi
l
dst
ayal
one,
whati
f
amaphar
abr
eaki
nandhar
m her
.
KwaMashui
sadanger
ouspl
ace!
”He’
s
r
ightont
hatone.Iwoul
dhat
eiti
f
somet
hingwer
etohappent
oher
.“ButI
won’
tal
l
owv
atandsi
tinmyhousehel
l
no!
”Ist
hismanf
orr
eal
?Nandi
andIar
e
noti
nrel
ati
onshi
phowar
ewe
cohabi
tat
ing?Ont
opoft
hathecutout
myal
l
owance,
Ihav
enocentIcan’
tev
en
payf
ormyf
uel
orspoi
lmyDol
l
facear
gh!
I
t’
shasbeenast
ressf
ult
woweeks.

“
Cel
auf
akeoweR50mf
ethu”IsayasI
countmycoi
ns.Ihav
efi
l
thyr
ichpar
ent
s
butIcanonl
yaf
for
d3l
i
trespet
rol
,st
ory
ofmyl
i
fe!Ipayf
ormyf
uel
thendr
iveof
f
t
omyuncl
e’
shouse.WhenIar
ri
veIpul
l
ov
ernex
ttohi
scarandst
epoutofmy
car
.Iwal
ktot
hedoorandknockbut
he’
snotanswer
ingsoImakemywayi
n.
If
indhi
minhi
sst
udyr
oom gl
uedonhi
s
l
apt
opandhasheadseton.Hi
sbacki
s
f
aci
ngt
hedoorsohecan’
tseeme.I
wal
kcl
oset
ohi
m andl
ookwhati
s
engr
ossi
ngonhi
slapt
opscr
een.Ican’
t
bel
i
evewhatI
’
m seei
ngshi
t!Iwantt
o
cl
osemyey
esbutI
’
m unabl
etocan.Mr
Ki
spoundi
ngMi
ra’
smom f
rom behi
nd
i
nhi
sof
fi
ce.If
eel
myt
emper
atur
eri
sing
byeacht
hrusthe’
smaki
ngandIcan
hearherscr
eamsf
rom myuncl
es
headset
s.NowIknowmybabyi
sa
scr
eamerl
i
kehermom.Jesust
hisi
s
wr
ongIshoul
dn’
tbel
ooki
ngatmy
gi
rl
fr
iend’
spar
ent
sfucki
ng.Howwoul
dI
l
ookatt
hem especi
all
yMi
ra’
smom.I
t
apuncl
eonhi
sshoul
derandhej
umps
wi
thshockal
mostf
all
i
ngont
hef
loor
.I
can’
thel
pbutshr
iekwi
thl
aught
er

“
Shi
twhatt
hehel
l
!!”
“
I’
m sor
ry”Isayl
aughi
ng
“
Howdi
dyougeti
nyoushoul
dhav
e
knocked!
”
“
Iknocked,
youdi
dn’
thearmebutnowI
seewhy
”Myey
esdar
ttohi
sbonerandI
l
aughal
lov
eragai
n
“
Fucky
ouLwandl
enx
!”Hepunchesme
ont
heshoul
der
“
Ouch”
“
Ngi
yak’
l
aya”
“
Ehndodauz
ival
elal
akant
iubukai
por
n”
(
youl
ockedy
our
sel
fher
etowat
chpor
n)
“
Hai
sukat
hisi
snotpor
n,Iknowr
eal
por
nmi
na.Khumal
odoesn’
tknowhow
t
ofuckawoman.
”Igi
ggl
ed.Myuncl
e
andIar
ever
ycl
osehe’
sli
keaf
athert
o
me.Il
ovehi
m somuchhe’
sthecool
est
uncl
eint
hewhol
ewor
ld.Onewoul
dn’
t
t
ell
thathe’
smyuncl
ethewaywemock
eachot
herandt
alkaboutany
thi
ngand
ev
ery
thi
ng.I
t’
sli
kewear
efr
iends,
my
daddoesn’
tli
keourr
elat
ionshi
pbut
mom hasnopr
obl
em i
nfactshel
i
kes
t
hatherbr
otherl
ovesherchi
l
dren.
“
Thewayshe’
sscr
eami
ng,
it’
stel
l
sthat
he’
shi
tt
ingi
tri
ght
”
“
It
’sal
lfakeI
’
mtel
l
ingy
ou.She’
s
pr
etendi
ngt
obef
eel
i
nggood,
Int
o
ay
izi
yonj
eukushay
aabaf
azi
”(Al
lhe
knowsi
stobeatupwomen)
“
Buty
ourboner
…”
“
Hai
sukaf
useg!Tel
lmewhatbr
ought
y
ouher
e”
Igr
abachai
randsi
tdown
“
Ineedsomecashi
t’
sroughcabanga
ngi
fakeI
-pet
rol
yeR50”Hebur
sti
nto
l
aught
er
“
It
’snotf
unnyy
ouknow”
“
Hadent
wanasbutIcan’
tbel
i
evea
whol
etr
ustf
undki
disbr
oke”Hesay
s
l
aughi
ng
“
Mxm”
“
He’
sst
il
lpuni
shi
ngy
ouf
or
i
mpr
egnat
ingl
oyamocondo”(
that
’s
ski
nnygi
rl
)
“
Heyt
hat
’samot
herofmychi
l
d!”He
l
aughs
“
That
’sgi
rli
snotpet
it
eshe’
sthi
nusho
ngez
inqaez
incanengat
hii
nsangu
y
eshumi
”(Shehassmal
lbut
tli
keR1
packofweed)Hebur
sti
ntol
aught
er.
Tr
ustmyuncl
etosayt
hatIgi
vehi
ma
deadst
are
“
Okaysor
rydon’
tki
l
lmeatl
eastt
hough
t
hebl
i
ndonehav
emeati
nther
ight
pl
aces”
“
Mxmy
azwena…howar
ethi
ngsgoi
ng
wi
thKhumal
o”
“
Weneedanewpl
anj
ail
wil
lnotwor
khe
hasev
ery
oneonhi
spay
rol
lorwemi
ght
aswel
lki
l
lhi
m”
“
Hayhaynoki
l
li
ngmal
ume”
“
Ify
oul
i
vel
i
keadogy
ouwi
l
ldi
eli
kea
dog.Thi
smandoesn’
tdeser
vet
oli
ve.
Thewor
ldwoul
dbeabet
terpl
ace
wi
thouthi
m.Hedeser
veasl
owpai
nful
deat
h.Hehast
opayf
oral
ltheev
il
deedshehasdonei
nhi
sli
fe”
“
Iheary
oubutki
l
li
ngi
stooeasyhe
deser
vespai
n,ex
tremel
ypai
nful
pai
n
unt
ilhewi
sht
odi
e.WhataboutI
nno
hav
eyout
racedhi
sphonenumber
?”
“
NoIcan’
tfi
ndhi
m man”
Somet
hingi
sgoi
ngonher
eIcanf
eel
it.
Wet
alkmor
eaf
tert
hathegi
vesme
R1000i
t’
snott
hatbad.Icanev
ent
ake
outmybabyf
ordi
nnerdat
etomor
row.I
hav
enev
ert
akeheroutonapr
oper
di
nnerdat
e.Ibi
dfar
ewel
ltomyuncl
e
anddr
ivet
othemal
lj
ustt
oget
Dol
l
face’
sfav
ori
techocol
atesand
f
lower
s.Ical
lherasI
’
m ont
hewayand
sheconf
ir
mst
hatshe’
shomeandshe’
s
al
one.Ican’
twai
ttoseeher
,Imi
ssed
hersomuch.Il
astsawheronTuesday
andt
odayi
t’
sFr
iday
.Ihav
ebeenv
ery
busywi
thschool
wor
k.ThemomentI
geti
nwhensheopenst
hedoorf
ormeI
pul
lhert
omyar
msandsni
ff
shersweet
scent
.
“
Imi
ssedy
ousomuch”Shesay
s
agai
nstmychest
.
“
Imi
ssedy
out
oo,
don’
twor
ryi
t’
sjust
y
ouandmet
hewhol
eweekend”
“
Andwor
k?”Igr
oanandpul
lheraway
gent
ly.Howdi
dIf
orgett
oment
iont
hat
I
’
mteaboyi
nmydad’
scompanyandI
di
dn’
thav
easayont
hat
.Ar
ght
hisman
i
sreal
l
ymaki
ngmyl
i
fehel
l
“
Iwi
l
lfakesi
cknesst
henwewi
l
lsneak
outt
ospendt
hewhol
edayandni
ght
t
oget
her
”Shegi
ggl
esohhowImi
ssed
hergi
ggl
es.
“
Ili
ket
hesoundoft
hatbuty
ouknow
t
haty
ouhav
etoaskmymom andI
’
m
notsur
eaboutt
heni
ghtsi
nceuhm y
ou
know”Isi
gh
“
Iheary
oubutt
omor
rowI
’
m spendi
nga
dayandni
ghtwi
thy
ou,
dar
korbl
ue.I
wi
l
lki
dnapy
oui
fIhav
eto”Shel
aughs
“
Youar
ecr
azy
!”
“
I’
m cr
azyi
nlov
ewi
thy
ou”Shebl
ushes
asherey
esspar
kles.Herey
esar
emy
f
avor
it
e,shehast
hemostbeaut
if
ul
haz
elbr
owney
esIhav
eev
erseen.I
t’
sa
pi
tyt
heycan’
tseebutIt
hinkt
hatwhat
makest
hem ev
enmor
ebeaut
if
ul.
“
Ibr
oughty
ouy
ourf
avour
it
echocol
ates
andf
lower
s”
“
Ohbaby
,youshoul
dn’
thav
e”
“
Can’
tamanspoi
lhi
swoman?
”
“
Notwhenhe’
sbr
oke”Herv
oicei
slaced
wi
thamusement
.
“
Mxm sewy
aphaphamanj
e!”
“
I’
m ki
ddi
ngmyl
ove,
thanky
ouso
much”Igi
vehert
hef
lower
sshei
nhal
es
t
hem
“
Theysmel
lsol
ovel
y”
“
Letmehel
pyouputt
hem i
nav
ase”Her
f
acechangesandIknowwhatt
hatl
ook
means.Shesay
sI’
m maki
ngherf
eel
li
ke
shecan’
ttakecar
eofher
sel
fbutt
rust
met
hat
’snotwhatI
’
mtr
yingt
odo.Ij
ust
l
ovedoi
ngt
hingsf
orher
.
“
Ha.
naLwenkosi
”
“
I’
m sor
ry”Iki
ssherf
oreheadandpour
my
sel
fagl
assofj
uicef
rom t
hef
ri
dge
whi
l
eshedi
sappear
stof
etchanempt
y
v
ase.Il
ookatherasshef
il
lswat
eri
nto
t
hev
aset
hendi
pst
hef
lower
sint
he
f
lower
s,Iswearshe’
sget
ti
ngmor
e
beaut
if
uleachpassi
ngday
.Hert
highs
l
ookl
i
keaf
easti
nthatdeni
m shor
t
cl
i
ngi
ngonherassandhi
ps.If
eel
my
di
ckt
wit
chi
ngi
nmypant
s.Onceshe’
s
doneshegot
othel
i
vingr
oom t
opl
ace
t
hev
aset
her
eandcomesback.
“
Youwantsomet
hingt
oeat
?”Iwal
k
cl
oset
oherandpul
lhert
omebyher
wai
st
“
Yes”
“
Whatdoy
ouwantt
oeat
?”
“
You”Ibi
teherl
owerl
i
pbef
oresucki
ng
i
t,shemoansi
nmymout
h.
“
I’
m notf
ood”Shesay
sgi
ggl
i
ngandI
l
augh.Oneoft
het
hingst
hatmakeme
f
all
forherev
erydayi
sheri
nnocence.
I
t’
ssocut
ebaki
thi
.
“
Iwantt
odev
ourmycooki
e”Icupher
pussyov
erhershor
tsandshegasps
“
Anddr
inkal
lyourdel
i
ciousj
uices”Ibi
te
herear
lobecausi
nghert
omoanmy
name
“
Lwenkosi
”Ev
ery
onecal
lmeLwandl
eto
shor
tenmynamebutshecal
l
sme
Lwenkosi
whi
chmakesi
tsospeci
alj
ust
l
i
keher
.Ihol
dthebackofherheadand
ki
ssherl
i
pssheobl
i
ge,
deepeni
ngt
he
ki
ss.Iwhi
skherof
fthef
loorand
somet
hingf
all
asshewr
apsherl
egs
ar
oundmywai
stIassumei
t’
smuf
fi
n.I
pl
aceheront
hecount
erwi
thout
br
eaki
ngt
heki
ss.Ihav
ebeencr
avi
ng
f
orhersi
ncet
hedayIsawher
.It
rai
l
gent
lyki
ssesonherneckwhi
l
e
unbut
toni
nghershor
tst
henmakeher
l
eanat
adbackwar
dsandbal
ancewi
th
herhandsont
hecount
er.
“
Arey
oucomf
ort
abl
e?”
“
Yess”shewhi
sper
s,It
akeof
fher
shor
tst
oget
herwi
thherpant
ies.
“
Openy
ourl
egsf
ormebaby
”Sheopen
herl
egs,
Isal
i
vat
eatt
hesi
ghtofher
shav
ensmoot
hpussywi
thwetf
olds
andbi
gbean.
“
Ohhf
uck!
”Ist
uffmyf
acebet
weenher
t
highsandsmel
lhersweetj
uices
l
eaki
ngbet
weenherl
egs.Il
ovehowher
bodyr
eact
stomyev
eryt
ouch.Ir
ubher
beanwi
thmyot
herhandwhi
l
efondl
i
ng
herboobwi
tht
heot
her
“
AhhhLwenkosi
i
i”It
akeoutherboob
under
neat
hherspor
tbr
aandsuckon
herswol
l
enni
ppl
e,shesqui
rms
t
hrowi
ngherheadback.Hermoansar
e
musi
cinmyear
s.Iwor
kmyt
ongue
ar
oundhersweetmoundov
erandov
er
eachf
oldanddar
tmyt
onguedeepi
n
herhol
eli
cki
ngar
oundheri
nsi
dewal
l
s
t
henspr
eadherj
uicesar
oundherbi
g
bean.Herscr
eamsofpl
easur
efi
l
lher
mot
her
’ski
tchenandt
het
houghtofher
mot
herwal
ki
ngi
nonusi
sspi
ral
l
ingmy
desi
re.
“
Ohhhl
ord!Il
ovey
oubaby
!Yesess
ahhh”Myphoner
ingsIi
gnor
eitbuti
t’
s
keepr
ingi
ng
“
I’
m sor
rybaby
,itcoul
dbei
mpor
tant
”I
t
akeoutmyphoneandansweri
t.
“
Hel
l
o”i
t’
sNandi
she’
scr
ying
“
Nandi
what
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Mygr
andmot
herpassedawayLwandl
e,
what
’sam Igoi
ngt
odo”Shecr
ies
“
OhI
’
m sor
ryNandi
”
“
Weneedy
ouLwandl
e,pl
ease”
“
Wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
Att
hehospi
tal
”
“
I’
m comi
ngokaycal
m down”Ihangup
andl
ookatMi
ra
“
Awuy
indawo!
”(Youar
enotgoi
ng
any
wher
e)
“
Sheneedsmebaby
,hergr
andmot
her
passedaway
”
“
Youcan’
tmakemef
eel
hotl
i
ket
hisand
l
eav
emej
ustl
i
ket
hat
”
“
Youar
ebei
ngunr
easonabl
enow.
”
“
Idon’
tunder
standwhyy
ouhav
etogo
t
oherLwandl
elwenkosi
,youwon’
twake
hergr
andmot
herup.
”
“
Wowt
hat
’ssoi
nsensi
ti
veandunl
i
ke
y
ou!
”
“
Buti
t’
str
ue,
pleasedon’
tgoLwenkosi
”I
putherdownandgi
vehershor
tsand
pant
ies,
shest
art
sget
ti
ngdr
essed
“
I’
mleav
ing”Isaywal
ki
ngoutandt
he
momentIshutt
hedoorIhearhercr
ying,
myhear
tbr
eaksi
ntopi
eces.Iwantt
ogo
backandcomf
ortherbutwhatabout
Nandi
?Ineedt
obet
her
eforherand
ensur
ethatshest
ayscal
m sot
hatshe
doesn’
tloset
hebaby
.Mydi
cki
sst
il
l
t
hrobbi
ngandhar
dIgeti
nmycarand
dr
iveof
f.Icanst
il
lhearMi
ra’
spi
eci
ng
cr
yinmyear
sandIf
eel
awf
ull
eav
ing
hercr
ying.Imakeau-
tur
nandgoback.
Thegat
eisopenandt
her
e’scarpar
ked
i
nthedr
ive.Iassumei
t’
shermom,
she’
s
backI
’
m chi
ckeni
ngoutnowbutI
’
m
al
readyher
eIneedt
omanup.Imake
mywayt
othedoorandknock.The
momentheopenst
hedoorandseesme
hegr
absmebyt
hecol
l
arandpi
nsme
agai
nstt
hedoor
.
“
Bast
ard,
whathav
eyoudonet
oher
huh!
!”Heshr
iekswi
thangerandIwon’
t
l
i
eI’
m soscar
edbutIdon’
tshowi
t
“
Whatt
hef
uckmaan,
letgoofmeSox
!”
”
Iaskedy
ouquest
ion!
”
“
Leav
emet
hef
uckal
one,
I’
m nother
e
f
ory
ou.Iwantmygi
rl
.Mi
ra!Dol
l
faceI
’
m
sor
ry!I
’
m back,
Idi
dn’
tgosweet
hear
t!
!”I
pushhi
m buthe’
stoost
rongandbei
ng
ski
nnyi
snotdoi
ngmeanyj
ust
ice
“
Stayt
hef
uckawayf
rom hercozy
ou
don’
tknowhowt
otr
eather
!Howcan
y
oul
eav
ehercr
yingnx
!Hambaf
uthi
la!
”
(
Getout
!)HepushesmeoutandIl
ose
bal
anceandf
all
ont
hepav
ement
,
hur
ti
ngmyel
bow.What
’swr
ongwi
th
t
hisguyandwhodoeshet
hinkhei
snx
!
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayNt
omboz
uko
Nt
oshLose&HappyBi
rt
hdayWashu
Muchachi

CHAPTER19

Ihav
equest
ionsIkeepaski
ngmy
sel
f
ev
erysi
ngl
eday
,ist
hisr
eal
l
ywhatI
want
,howIwantt
ofeel
,wi
l
lIr
eal
l
ybe
abl
etohandl
ethi
s?Hav
ingt
owonder
ev
eryt
imewhathe’
supt
owi
thNandi
si
ncet
heyar
eli
vi
ngundert
hesamer
oof
.
Mymi
ndcant
ryt
oignor
ebutmyhear
t,
ohmyhear
tdoesn’
twannal
etgo.My
hear
tbel
i
evesi
nourl
ove,
myhear
t
bel
i
evest
hatst
icki
ngwi
theachot
her
despi
teal
louri
ssuesandpr
obl
ems
br
ingf
ort
hper
fect
ion.Wehav
ebeen
f
ight
ingal
oti
nthepastt
woweeksdue
t
othei
ssueofNandi
stay
ingwi
tht
hem
i
nthei
rhousebutheswor
eonhi
s
br
other
’sgr
avet
hathel
ovesonl
yme
andhewi
l
lnev
ercheatonme.Ibel
i
eve
hi
m,Ir
eal
l
ydobutwhenIt
hinkofwhat
mom sai
daboutboy
sbei
ngeasi
l
y
t
empt
edandt
hepossi
bil
i
tyofNandi
want
inghi
m backi
tsper
tur
bingr
eal
l
y
andwhathehasdonenowi
sst
art
ingt
o
makemef
eel
li
keIwasgul
l
ibl
eto
bel
i
evet
hathel
ovesmeonl
y.Howcan
hel
eav
emehangi
ngl
i
ket
hisandgot
o
hi
sbabymamaj
ustbecause“
sheneeds
hi
m,hergr
andmot
herpassedaway
”
Doeshehav
esomesor
tofpower
sto
wakepeopl
efr
om t
hedeat
h?Nodon’
t
getmewr
ongI
’
m notabr
asi
vebuti
t’
s
t
heact
ual
fact
.

It
houghthe’
sresponsi
blef
ort
hebaby
she’
scar
ryi
ngonl
ynotherar
gh!
.We
har
dlyspendmucht
imel
atel
yhehas
beenbusywi
thschool
wor
kandon
weekendshe’
swor
kingi
nhi
sfat
her
’s
companyasat
eaboyandwhenhe
f
inal
l
yhadt
imef
ormehej
ustl
eav
eme
l
i
ket
his.I
’
m soangr
yandhur
tri
ghtnow,
mybodyi
sst
il
lsensi
ti
veandmyknees
ar
ewobbl
i
ngf
rom al
lthet
hingshedi
d
t
ome.Themomentheshutt
hedoor
,I
si
tont
hef
loorandcr
y.I
t’
scl
eart
hatI
don’
tmat
tert
hatmuchsi
nceI
m nott
he
onecar
ryi
nghi
schi
l
d.Goshwhydoesi
t
hav
etohur
tthi
smuch.If
eel
hands
wr
appi
ngar
oundmeandj
umpwi
th
f
ri
ght
.
“
Heymt
wanai
t’
smedon’
tbescar
ed.
”
Wher
ehashebeen,
Imi
ssedhi
m so
much.Ihav
en’
tseenhi
m si
ncehet
old
met
hatI
’
m wi
thLwenkosi
becausehe’
s
r
ich.Thosewor
dshi
thome.
“
What
’swr
ong,
whyar
eyoucr
ying”The
concer
ninhi
svoi
cecan’
tbemi
ssed.I
t
ryt
otal
kbutwor
dsf
ail
me
“
Wher
ear
eyourpar
ent
s?”
“
Mom wentt
oseedadathi
swor
kpl
ace”
Isaywi
that
ear
yvoi
ce
“
Thenwhyar
eyoucr
yingal
one.Tal
kto
mepl
ease”Isensepani
cinhi
sshaki
ng
v
oice
“
I’
mfi
ne”
“
Comeonmt
wanat
ell
mewhohur
tyouI
swearIwi
l
ldeal
wit
hthem.I
’
m her
e
mt
wanapl
easet
ell
me”Ishakemyhead
noasIcr
yloud
“
Someonehur
tyou?
”Inod
“
Wher
e?”Ipoi
ntmyhear
t
“
Shi
tletmesee?
”
“
Imeani
nmyhear
tmal
umeSox
”
“
It
’st
hatski
nnyboy
fri
endofy
our
sisn’
t!
”
Idon’
trepl
ytot
hatbecauseIknowhe
doesn’
tli
kehi
m.
“
It
’shi
m!I
’
m goi
ngt
oki
l
lthatboy
!”
“
Nomal
umei
t’
snothi
m Isweardon’
t
hur
thi
m.Iwi
l
lbef
inei
nfactI
’
mfi
ne”I
maybeangr
yandhur
tbutt
hatdoesn’
t
meanIwanthi
mtobehur
t.Ist
il
ll
ove
hi
m okayandIdon’
tunder
standwhati
s
i
twi
thmal
umeSoxanddadaboutki
l
li
ng
andv
oil
ence.Thewor
d“ki
l
li
ng”t
othem
comesouteasi
l
yasi
nki
l
li
ngaper
soni
s
ar
ightt
hingt
odonoreasyt
odo.
“
Comel
et’
sgot
othel
i
vingr
oom y
ou
can’
tsi
ther
eont
hef
loor
”Hescoops
meupandwal
kwi
thmet
othel
ounge
andgent
lypl
acesmeonhi
slaps.I
nest
lemyheadonhi
sneckwhi
l
ehe
st
rokesmyback.
“
Shhhdon’
tcr
ymt
wanaI
’
m her
e”He
comf
ort
smeI
’
m unt
ilIcal
m down.
“
Thanky
ouIf
eel
bet
ternow”
“
Tel
lmewhathappened?
”
“
Not
hingIcanthandl
e”
“
Ihat
etoseey
oucr
yingandhur
ti
ng
mt
wana”
“
Buty
oual
sohur
tme”Her
eleaseasi
gh
“
I’
m sor
ry,
Inev
ermeantt
osayt
hose
wor
dspl
easef
orgi
veme”
“
Whydohat
ehi
m?”
“
Idon’
that
ehi
m Ij
ustdon’
tli
kehi
m”
“
Why
?”
“
Woul
dyoul
i
kesomeonewhogot
somet
hingy
ouwantsobadl
ybuty
ou
can’
thav
eit
?”
“
Mmm Idon’
tknowmay
bey
esmay
be
no…whatdoeshehav
ethaty
ouwant
buty
oucan’
thav
eit
”
“
It
’sdoesn’
tmat
ter
..
.don’
tyouwantme
t
otel
lyouast
ory
”
“
Yespl
ease”Il
oveuncl
eSox
’sst
ori
es
becauset
heyar
ehi
l
ari
ousev
ent
hough
t
heyar
etoomuchex
agger
ati
onbutt
hey
ar
ever
yent
ert
aini
ng.

Imusthav
efal
l
enasl
eepwhi
l
ehewas
t
ell
i
ngt
hest
orybecauseI
’
m wokenup
byt
heur
get
opee.Icant
ell
thatI
’
min
mybedr
oom byt
hesmel
l
.Muf
fi
n?The
l
astt
imeshewasi
nmyhandwaswhen
Lwenkosi
waski
ssi
ngmei
ntheki
tchen
af
tert
hatIdon’
twhathappened.I
’
m
scr
ewed!If
iddl
eforherwher
eIusual
l
y
puthernex
ttomybedsi
det
abl
eand
f
indhert
her
e.Ismi
l
e,howt
hought
ful
of
Mal
umeSox
.Iwal
ktomybat
hroom and
domybusi
nesst
henf
lushbef
ore
washi
ngmyhands.If
eel
soex
haust
ed,
st
ressdoest
hatt
oyou.Icanhearmom
si
ngi
ngasI
’
mtr
udgi
ngal
ongt
he
passage.Thesmel
lofbeefst
ewhi
tsme
asIent
ert
heki
tchen.

“
Yazy
oushoul
dn’
tsi
ngwheny
ouar
e
cooki
ng”
“
Iwasaboutt
owakey
ouupandwhyi
s
t
hat
?”Mom asksIcanheari
nherv
oice
t
hatshe’
shappy
.Iwi
shshecanbel
i
ke
t
hisf
orev
erbutweal
lknowt
hisi
sfor
t
empor
ary
.Dadwi
l
lbebackati
tagai
n.
“
Becausey
ouwi
l
lspi
tinourf
ood”
“
Udaki
we!
”Ibur
sti
ntol
aught
er
“
Kodai
t’
str
uemama”
“
Hai
sukauy
abheda,
Idon’
thav
ea
l
eaki
ngmout
h”Igi
ggl
e.ButI
’
m maki
ng
apoi
ntguy
sri
ght
?Thi
nkabouti
t.
“
Mal
umeSoxl
eft
?”
“
Yeshel
eftwhenIgother
e”
“
whydi
dn'
thewakemeupt
osay
goodby
e”
“
Youwer
esl
eepi
ngpeacef
ull
yhedi
dn’
t
wantt
owakey
ouup”
“
Itwoul
dn’
thav
emat
ter
edhe’
sreal
l
y
scar
cet
heseday
s.I
’
m notev
ensur
e
t
hathe’
sst
il
lmychauf
feurornot
”
“
Moswenay
ouhav
eaboy
fri
endnow
whoi
sdr
ivi
ngy
ouar
ound”
“
Wel
ltr
uebutIdi
dn’
tfi
rehi
myouknow.
”
Shel
aughs
“
Wenanaf
ir
ehi
m!”Il
augh
“
Yesphel
aI’
m hi
sboss.Youknowi
t
doesn’
tmat
tert
hatdadi
spay
ingand
f
uthi
Ist
il
lhav
epl
acest
hatIwanna
t
rav
elwi
thoutLwenkosi
”
“
Isev
ery
thi
ngokaybet
weent
het
woof
y
ou?
”
“
Wear
efi
nemom”Il
i
e
“
YouknowIknowy
ou,
somet
hingi
s
goi
ngonandy
ouar
eaf
rai
dify
out
alkt
o
meabouti
tIwi
l
lbemadandt
ell
yout
o
endt
hingswi
thhi
m”Goshaper
son
can’
tknowmel
i
ket
hisi
t’
snotr
ightatal
l
.
HowcanIl
i
etoheri
fsheknowsmel
i
ke
t
hisphel
asomet
imesl
i
esar
eneeded
y
ouknow.Notbi
gli
kej
ustsmal
lny
ana
l
i
es
“
Whatar
eyoucooki
ng?
”Ichanget
he
t
opi
c
“
Iwon’
ttel
lyout
oleav
ehi
m because
y
ouwi
l
lal
way
swonderwhati
fyouguy
s
wor
kedoutandy
ouwi
l
lhat
emef
or
st
andi
ngi
nyourway
.Youdon’
thav
eto
keept
hingsf
rom me.I
’
myourmot
her
andIwi
l
lnev
erj
udgey
ou.Al
lIwantf
or
y
oui
stobehappy
”She’
smaki
ngme
f
eel
gui
l
tynow
“
Iknowmom andt
hanky
ousomuch”
“
Igoty
oual
way
s,I
’
m pr
essedI
’
m
comi
ngbacknow”
“
Okay
”Ihearherf
oot
stepsshuf
fl
ing
awayIunt
ilIcoul
dn’
theart
hem.Imake
mywayt
othef
ri
dgeandl
ookf
or
mel
rosecheesespr
eadbutIcan’
tfi
ndi
t.
Iputi
tther
emy
sel
ftodaywher
eisi
t
now.It
ryeachanev
erycupboar
dbut
I
’
m unabl
etof
indi
t.Not
hingi
s
f
rust
rat
ingasl
ooki
ngf
orsomet
hingbut
notbei
ngabl
etof
indi
t.I
t’
sev
enwor
se
f
orpeopl
eli
kemehav
ingt
otouchand
f
eel
eachanev
ery
thi
ngi
nthecupboar
d
unt
ily
ouf
indt
hatt
hingy
ouar
elooki
ng
f
or.I
tsv
eryi
mpor
tantt
oputsomet
hing
wher
eyouf
oundi
taf
terusi
ngi
tsot
hat
i
t’
swi
l
lbeeasyf
ormet
ofi
ndi
twhenI
wanti
t.Wehav
edi
ff
erentmet
hodsand
ski
l
lsweuset
omakeourl
i
veseasyf
or
us.Ii
dent
if
ydi
ff
erentf
oodand
packagesbysi
ze,
shapeort
heki
ndof
cont
ainert
heycomei
nbutt
her
ear
e
ot
hert
hingst
hatar
enott
hateasyt
otel
l
whatt
heyar
eli
kecansofv
eget
abl
esor
f
rui
ts,
saucessowel
abel
edt
hem wi
th
Br
ail
l
e.Ial
sot
ast
eandsmel
ltot
ell
the
t
hingsapar
t.
“
Whatar
eyoul
ooki
ngat
?”Mom asks,
I
di
dn’
tev
enhearherwal
ki
ngi
n.
“
Me.
.mel
rosecheesespr
ead”Isaywi
th
aneart
ear
svoi
ce
“
Don’
tcr
y,I
’
m sor
ryt
hatIdi
dn’
tputi
t
backIf
orgot
.Her
eiti
s”shehandsme
j
arofmel
rosecheesespr
ead
“
I’
m sor
ryokay
”Inodasshewi
pesmy
t
ear
s
“
Sitdown,
Iwi
l
lmakef
oodf
ory
ou”
“
Ijustwantaspoonf
ulofi
t,I
’
m not
hungr
y”
“
Her
eIwast
hinki
ngy
ouar
ehungr
y
mx
myousuchababyy
ouknow”Igi
ggl
e
“
Yourbaby
”Il
ookf
oraspooni
nthe
dr
aweranddi
ginaf
teropeni
ngt
he
mel
rosecheesespr
eadj
art
henshov
eit
i
nmymout
h.
“
Mama”If
indmywayt
othechai
rand
si
tdown
“
Yes?
”
“
Doy
our
eal
l
ythi
nkdad'
sther
apy
sessi
onsar
ewor
king.He’
sbeenr
eal
l
y
ni
cef
ort
hesepastt
woweeks.Al
most
t
heol
dKhumal
oweknow”Ir
eal
l
y
mi
ssedt
hatsi
deofhi
m butI
’
m af
rai
dhe
wi
l
lbackati
tagai
n
“
Ihopehehasbaby
,twoweeksi
san
i
mpr
ovement
”
“
May
benotgi
vi
nghi
m at
tent
ioni
swhat
madehi
mreal
i
zet
haty
oucan’
tal
way
s
wor
shi
phi
sabusi
veass”
“
Heyt
hat
’sy
ourf
ather
,youhav
eto
r
especthi
m!”
“
Hel
ostmyr
espectt
hedayhel
aidhi
s
handony
ou.Tel
lmewhenwi
l
lyout
ell
meaboutmyf
ather
?”
“
Sewqal
i
le!
”
“
Butwhaty
ouar
edoi
ngi
sreal
l
ywr
ong
mom.Ideser
vet
oknowwhatki
ndofa
manhewasatl
east
.Ithur
tst
hatIwas
r
obbedachancet
oknowhi
m”
“
Ufi
l
eyez
wa!He’
sdead,
tal
ki
ngabout
hi
m won’
tbr
inghi
m back!
”Ihuf
fand
cont
inueeat
ingt
hemel
rosecheese
spr
ead.Yeponespoonf
ult
urnoutt
obe
mor
e
“
Arey
our
eadyf
ort
hecompet
it
ion”
“
Ithi
nkso”Ideci
dedt
oent
ert
he
compet
it
ion.ImeanIhav
enot
hingt
o
l
ose.Sot
hecompet
it
ioni
snex
t
Sat
urday
.OnFr
idaywear
eleav
ingf
or
Johannesbur
gthat
’swher
ethe
compet
it
ionwi
l
ltakepl
aceatSunCi
ty
andI
twi
l
lbet
elev
ised.I
’
m soner
vous
honest
lyIhopeIdowel
l
.
“
Mir
ayousai
dyouwantonespoonnot
t
hewhol
ebot
tl
e!”Oops
“
I’
m sor
rymommyt
hisshi
ttast
eso
f
ucki
nggood”Onespooni
nvi
test
he
secondandi
tgoesonunt
ili
t’
sal
l
f
ini
shed
“
Shi
t?Fucki
ng?Ar
eyouusi
ngt
hat
l
anguagewi
thme?
”Ei
shLwenkosi
is
r
uini
ngmyv
ocabul
ary
,thatboyswear
s
al
lthet
imeunnecessar
il
y.Onewoul
d
t
hinkhe’
sanAmer
icanr
apperwannabe.
“
I’
m sosor
rymommy
”Ipur
semyl
i
ps
“
Hai
sukast
opl
ooki
ngal
lcut
eaphaand
hel
pmewi
thcooki
ng”Igetupandhel
p
herwi
thcooki
ng
Weheart
hecardr
ivei
nthenseconds
l
ater
,dadwal
ksi
n
“
Myf
avor
it
eladi
es”
“
Heyhoney
”mom say
s
“
Hel
l
oBaba”
“
Daddy
’sl
i
ttl
epr
incess”Hescoopsme
upandpl
ant
ski
ssesal
lov
ermyf
ace
maki
ngmegi
ggl
e.
“
YouknowI
’
m nol
ongerachi
l
dnow”
Heuset
odot
hatal
oty
ear
sback
“
Ofcour
sephel
awheny
ouwer
eachi
l
d,
y
ouwer
enotheav
yli
ket
his.Yhuuu
nt
ombi
usuy
itshephel
amanj
e”Igi
ggl
e
“
Youwer
ecr
ying,
tel
ldaddywhomade
y
oucr
y?”
“
Noonedaddy
”
“
Youar
ely
ingt
ome,
Icansee”
“
Noi
m not
”
“
YouknowDaddycanki
l
lanyasshol
e
f
ory
ou”Her
egoest
hatwor
dagai
n“ki
l
l”
“
LanguageKhumal
o”mom say
scausi
ng
dadandIt
olaugh.Heput
smedown
andIcar
ryonwi
thwhatIwasdoi
ng.I
al
mostf
orgothowagoodf
atherhewas
bef
ore.
“
I’
m sor
rymydear
estbeaut
if
ulwi
fe”I
heart
heki
ssi
ngsoundoht
hanks
heav
ensI
’
m bl
i
nd!
Day
sfl
ewbyandImustsay
,ithasn’
t
beeneasywi
thoutbei
ngi
ncont
actwi
th
mycuddl
ecakes.I
’
m supermadathi
m
andGuguadv
isedmet
hatIshoul
dn’
tlet
hi
m of
fthehookeasi
l
yot
her
wisehe
won’
treal
i
zehowmuchhe’
shur
tmeby
l
eav
ingmel
i
ket
hatandt
ogobewi
th
hi
sbabymama.He’
sbeencal
l
ingnone
st
opandsendi
nggi
ft
s.Todayi
sFr
iday
andIdon’
tthi
nkI
’
mreadyt
oseehi
m.
I
’
m st
il
lhur
tandangr
ybutt
her
e’s
not
hingIcandosi
ncewewoul
dbe
goi
ngt
oget
hert
oJohannesbur
g.
Appar
ent
lydaddyhasani
mpor
tant
meet
ingt
omor
rowt
hathecan’
t
r
eschedul
esot
hatmeanswewi
l
luse
onecar
.Heapol
ogi
zedt
hough,
her
eal
l
y
want
edt
obet
her
eformebuthe
pr
omi
sedt
omakei
tupt
ome.It
rul
y
wantt
obel
i
evehe’
schangi
ngbutI
’
m
scar
edt
hati
tmi
ghtbet
oosoon.Ican
nev
erknowwhat
’sr
eal
l
ygoi
ngoni
nan
abusi
veman’
shead.

I
t’
sar
ound3pm andal
lthebagsar
e
packedwear
ejustwai
ti
ngf
or
Lwenkosi
’
smom t
ocomepi
ckusup.
Me,
mymom,
Mom Zo,
Snot
handoand
cuddl
ecakesofcour
se,
areal
lheadi
ng
t
oSunCi
ty.Nandi
’
sgr
andmawasbur
ied
dur
ingt
heweekandobv
iousl
y,t
he
Nkosi
’
scar
ri
edal
lthecost
soft
he
f
uner
al,
theyar
etr
ulygoodpeopl
e.
I
nnocenti
sst
il
lmi
ssi
ngi
nact
ionandhe
wasn’
tther
etobur
yhi
sgr
andmot
her
.I
wonderwher
ehei
s,hi
sdi
sappear
ance
i
sdi
sconcer
ti
ng,
noIdon’
tcar
eabout
hi
m obv
iousl
ybutIwanthi
mtocome
backsot
hathecant
akehi
ssi
sterback
bo!Mom Zot
oldmom t
hatt
her
ewasno
r
elat
iveatt
hef
uner
al.Theonl
ypeopl
e
t
her
ewer
ethemember
soft
he
communi
tyhencet
her
easonNandi
is
st
il
lst
ayi
ngatt
heNkosi
househol
d.
NowI
’
m st
art
ingt
odoubtt
hatshe
woul
dev
erl
eav
e.Si
gh!
“
Zoi
sonherwaynow”mom say
s
“
Trav
elsaf
ezi
thandwaz
ami
,wenaMi
ra
makeuspr
oudokay
”
“
Iwi
l
ltr
ydaddy
”
“
Don’
ttr
ydoi
t,Iknowy
ouwi
l
l”Isi
ght
he
ner
vesar
eki
l
li
ngme
“
Iwi
l
ltr
ytowat
cht
heshowont
vyez
wa”
“
Okaydadt
hanky
ou”Weheart
hehoot
,
dadhel
puswi
thourbagsandl
oadt
hem
i
nMom Zo’
scaraf
terpl
easant
ri
eshav
e
beenshar
ed.
“
Ever
ythi
ngi
sint
heboat
,dr
ivesaf
e
guy
sandpl
easecal
lmewheny
ouar
ri
ve
Bonga”Dadsay
s
“
Iwi
l
l”mom r
epl
i
es
“
Konj
ewhatchannel
wil
ltheybe
br
oadcast
ingt
heshow”
“
161”Isay
“
OkayIl
ovey
oupr
incess”Hehugsme
andki
ssesmyf
orehead.It
akeahuge
si
ghandgeti
nthecar
.
“
Hel
l
oMi
ra”say
sSnocheer
ful
l
y
“
Hel
l
obabygi
rl
,howar
eyou”
“
I’
m wel
lthanksandy
ou”
“
I’
m okay
”
“
Won’
tyouaskmehowmydaywas?
”I
chuckl
e,t
hischi
l
d.I
’
m sonoti
nthe
moodr
ightnow.Lwenkosi
’
spr
esencei
s
maki
ngmef
eel
somet
ypeawayandI
canf
eel
he’
sgaz
eonme
“
Howwasy
ourday
?”
“
Itwasgood,
Itol
dmycl
assmat
esand
mycl
asst
eachert
hatt
omor
rowmy
si
sterwoul
dbesi
ngi
ngont
v,t
heymust
wat
cht
heshowandt
heysai
dtheywi
l
l
Mi
ra”Ncooshe’
ssosweet
“
Yousai
dI’
myoursi
ster
”
“
Yesy
ouar
emybr
other
’sgi
rl
fr
iend
whi
chmakey
oumysi
sterandf
uthi
I
hav
eal
way
swant
edt
ohav
easi
ster
.”
Oht
hischi
l
dbaki
thi
,nomat
terhow
downy
ouar
eshehasawayofmaki
ng
y
ouf
eel
bet
ter
.Ot
herki
dswoul
dnot
pr
oudl
yannouncet
oot
herki
dst
hatI
’
m
t
hei
rsi
sterbecauset
hey
’dbeaf
rai
dthat
ot
herki
dswi
l
llaughatt
hem.I
t’
sasad
f
actr
eal
l
y,notki
dsonl
yev
enadul
ts.
Peopl
ethi
nkhav
ingadi
sabi
l
ityi
sa
choi
cesomet
hinki
t’
sacur
seandt
hey
makemocker
yofusorwewoul
drubof
f
ourdi
sabi
l
iti
est
othem asi
fit
’s
cont
agi
oushonest
lyt
hat
’sannoy
ingand
ex
haust
ing.Wecan’
tchoosehowwe
ar
ecr
eat
edorst
ruct
uredhenceeach
andev
eryoneofusi
sspeci
al.I
’
m bl
i
nd
sowhat
?Thi
sist
hewayGodcr
eat
ed
meandIhav
elear
ntt
oembr
acemyl
i
fe
t
hewayi
tis.Idon’
tneedy
our
der
ogat
oryr
emar
ksory
ourpi
ty.Thi
sis
whatIam andwhoIam,
treatmel
i
ke
anyot
herper
sonbecauseI
’
m al
so
human.
“
Ohmunchki
n,y
ousuchabeaut
if
ulsoul
y
ouknowt
hatandf
ort
hatIl
ovey
ou”
“
Ilov
eyout
ooMi
ra”Sher
est
sherhead
onmychestandIwr
apmyar
m ar
ound
hert
inywai
st.
“
Wecangonow”mom say
swhenshe’
s
i
n.Mom Zost
art
sthecaranddr
iveof
f.
Thedr
ivei
sfi
l
ledwi
tht
hemomschat
ter
andl
aught
er.
“
Youar
esobeaut
if
ulmyDol
l
face”He
whi
sper
sonmyearsendi
ngshi
ver
s
downmyspi
ne.Icanf
eel
asmi
l
e
t
uggi
ngt
hecor
ner
sofmyl
i
psbutI
suppr
essi
t.
“
I’
m sor
ryst
handwasami
”Inodwi
thmy
head.Isuddenl
ylostmyv
oice.Gosh,
I
hat
etheef
fecthehasonme.Iknewi
t’
s
notagoodi
deat
obewi
thhi
m becauseI
l
oseal
lmysensesandf
orgett
hatI
’
m
angr
yathi
m.If
eel
hisl
i
pspl
ant
inga
wetki
ssonmycheek
“
Ihav
emi
ssedy
ousomuch,
it’
ssogood
t
oseey
ou”
“
Imi
ssedy
out
oo”
“
Snocomeandsi
tont
hissi
deandIwi
l
l
si
tint
hemi
ddl
e”
“
Ha.
ah”Snosay
sasshesnuggl
escl
oser
onmychest
“
Mxmy
azuy
aphaphaokusal
ayoshe’
s
myDol
l
face”Il
aughathi
m he’
ssound
socut
eri
ghtnow.
“
Nami
she’
smysi
ster
”Il
aught
heset
wo.
I
tsf
unnyhowLwenkosi
isj
eal
ousofSno
heheni
ggawoul
dshi
thi
spant
sift
he
Nandi
issuewast
heot
herwayar
ound.
Ther
estoft
hedr
ivei
sfunandI
’
m
enj
oyi
ngi
t.Snoi
ssl
eepi
ngnowandher
headi
sonmyt
highs,
thatgav
e
Lwenkosi
anoppor
tuni
tyt
ost
eal
kisses
andf
ondl
esme
“
Ha.
naLwenkosi
themomsar
eher
e”
“
Imi
ssy
ou,
Ican’
thel
pmy
sel
f”He
pi
nchesmyboobsandIy
elp
“
What
’swr
ong?
”Askst
hemom wi
th
pani
c
“
It
’snot
hingmoms”r
epl
i
esLwenkosi
“
Behav
eyour
sel
fcuddl
ecakespl
ease”
“
Iwi
l
ltr
y”Asi
f!ayt
hisguyi
snaught
y
butIl
i
kei
t.I
t’
sar
ound8pm whenwe
ar
ri
veatLwenkosi
’
sfat
her
’sguest
house.Wear
eal
lti
redandweat
eont
he
waysower
eti
ret
osl
eep.It
houghtI
won’
tbeabl
etosl
eepduet
oner
vesbut
myex
haust
ioncamei
nhandy
.It
’st
he
nex
tmor
ningnowwear
ehav
ing
br
eakf
astbutIcan’
tst
omachany
thi
ng.
That
’showscar
edIam.Gugusai
dIwi
l
l
meethert
her
eandIcan’
twai
t.Ihav
e
mi
ssedhersomuch.
“
Youhav
etoeatsomet
hingbaby
”mom
say
s
“
I’
m nothungr
ymom”
“
Stopal
l
owi
ngner
vest
ocont
rol
you.
”
Lwenkosi
say
sInodbuthonest
lyIcan’
t
hel
pit
.Oncewear
edonewi
thbr
eakf
ast
wel
eav
eforSunCi
ty.Myhear
tski
pst
he
beatt
hemomentwemakeourent
rance.
I
’
mtr
yingt
oobser
vet
hispl
acebut
t
her
e’st
oomuchnoi
seandt
hatmakes
mef
eel
somet
ypeway
.
“
Mir
a!Mi
ra”IhearGugu’
svoi
cemyhear
t
j
umpswi
thj
oy
“
Gugui
sthat
’sy
ou?
”
“
YeahohhhImi
ssedy
ousomuch”We
squeez
eeachot
heri
ntoahug.
“
Lookaty
ou,
youl
ooki
ngdashi
ngbi
tch!
”
Iseeshehasn’
tchangeIgi
ggl
e
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Mir
aIdi
dn’
tknowy
oursecondnamei
s
bi
tch”Say
sSnoy
hoot
hischi
l
d
“
OhUnmhex
cusemymanner
s,
Sani
bonani
”Themomsgr
eetherback
“
Babest
hisi
sMom Zo,
Lwenkosi
and
hi
sli
tt
lesi
sterSnot
hando”Isay
“
Nicet
omeety
ouMamaandy
our
chi
l
dren.
”
“
Thecompet
it
ioni
saboutt
obegi
ngo
andf
indy
’al
lseat
sIwi
l
ltakeMi
ra’
sto
wher
etheot
hercont
est
ant
sar
e”
Lwenkosi
say
s,t
heyagr
eeandhugme
wi
shi
ngmeagoodl
uckaf
tert
hat
Lwenkosi
takesmyhandwal
kaway
.I’
m
shaki
nguncont
rol
l
abl
y
“
Youneedt
ocal
m downbaby
”
“
I’
m scar
edLwenkosi
”
“
I’
m her
ewi
thy
ou,
okaybaby
”
“
WhatI
fIt
ri
pandf
all
orwhati
fIget
ner
vousandmi
ssmyl
yri
cs.Yhooo
nkosi
yami
.Let
’sgobackhomeIcan’
tdo
t
his”
“
Heyheyy
oucandot
his.Bel
i
evei
n
y
our
sel
fokay
”Inodhewi
pesmyt
ear
s
andki
ssesme.Het
akesmet
owher
e
ev
ery
onei
s.I
t’
sbuz
zingandsome
peopl
ear
erehear
sing.Wear
egi
venour
number
sandsaf
epi
nssoLwenkosi
hel
pmet
oputpi
nitonmychest
.I’
m
number33andappar
ent
lyt
her
e’s50of
us.Onebyonewear
ebei
ngcal
l
edt
ogo
andsi
ngi
nfr
ontoft
heaudi
enceand
j
udges.Themor
emynumberkeeps
get
ti
ngcl
osert
hemor
eI’
m soner
vous.I
f
eel
li
keIwi
l
lfai
nt
“
Number33!
”ohgodi
t’
sme.
“
Rel
axOkay
”
“
I’
m scar
edLwenkosi
andIt
hinkI
’
m
goi
ngt
opeeonmy
sel
f”
“
Babyy
ougott
hist
rustme.Go”
“
Nodon’
tleav
eme!
”Isnap
“
OkayIwi
l
ltakey
out
othest
ageand
l
eav
eyout
her
e”Inodbi
ti
ngmyl
i
phar
d.
Hewal
kmet
othest
ageandIhearmy
momsandmyf
ri
endcheer
ingl
ouder
t
hanev
ery
oneel
se.
“
Showt
hem whoy
ouar
egi
rl
!Ki
ckt
hem
asses’
woooohh!
!”That
’sGugu.
Lwenkosi
giv
esmet
hemi
cand
whi
sper
sinmyear
“
Ilov
eyoumydol
l
face”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomycuddl
ecakes”Isay
f
orget
ti
ngt
hatI
’
m hol
dingt
hemi
c,what
wasmeantt
obehear
dbyLwenkosi
onl
y
t
urnedoutt
obehear
dbyev
ery
oneand
t
her
oom er
upt
swi
th“
ncoooooo”Ibl
ush.
“
Hel
l
oDol
l
face”say
stheman,
Iheara
bi
tlaught
er
“
Hi”
“
Howar
eyou?
”
“
I’
mfi
net
hanksandy
ou”
“
I’
m wel
l
,what
’sy
ournameDol
l
face”
“
I’
m Mi
ra”
“
JustMi
ra?
”Iswal
l
owspi
tmyhear
t
j
ackhammer
ingandmykneesar
e
wobbl
y
“
Yesbuti
t’
sshor
tforMi
racl
e”
“
Mir
acl
esuchabeaut
if
ul,
I’
m sur
e
t
her
e’sast
orybehi
ndt
hatname”
“
Ofcour
se”
“
I’
dsayshar
eitwi
thmebuty
ourcuddl
e
cakesi
sgi
vi
ngmescar
yst
ares.I
’
m not
r
eadyt
odi
e.”Ther
oom er
upt
swi
th
l
aught
er
“
Mir
acl
e,I
’
m Londi
siz
weSi
thol
ethehost
oft
heev
ent
.Inf
ronty
ouwehav
eour
j
udges,
Vusi
Nov
a,Kel
l
yKhumal
oand
Mr
sNKMngomez
ulu”
“
HiMi
racl
e”Thej
udgessayi
nuni
son
“
Sowhatar
eyougoi
ngt
osi
ngf
orus”
“
Demi
Lav
ito-Thi
sisme”
“
Thest
agei
sal
lyour
sMi
racl
e”Ibr
eat
he
i
nandoutgat
her
ingmyst
rengt
htosi
ng.
“
Yougoti
tbaby
!”Scr
eamsLwenkosi
.I
st
artsi
ngi
ng.
“
Ihav
eal
way
sbeent
heki
ndofgi
rlt
hat
hi
dmyf
ace
Soaf
rai
dtot
ell
thewor
ld
WhatI
’
vegott
osay
ButIhav
ethi
sdr
eam
Ri
ghti
nsi
deofme
I
’
m gonnal
eti
tshow
I
t’
sti
met
olety
ouknow

Thi
sisr
eal
Thi
sisme
I
’
m ex
act
lywher
eI’
m supposedt
obe
now
Gonnal
ett
hel
i
ghtshi
neonme
NowI
’
vef
oundwhoIam
Ther
e’snowayt
ohol
diti
n
Nomor
ehi
dingwhoIwannabe
Thi
sisme

Doy
ouknowwhat
’sl
i
ke
Tof
eel
soi
nthedar
k
Todr
eam aboutal
i
fe
Wher
eyouar
eashi
ningst
ar
Ev
ent
houghi
t’
sseems
Li
kei
t’
stoof
araway
Ihav
etobel
i
evei
nmy
sel
f
I
t’
stheonl
yway

Thi
sisr
eal
Thi
sisme
I
’
m ex
act
lywher
eI’
m supposedt
obe
now
Gonnal
ett
hel
i
ghtshi
neonme
NowI
’
vef
oundwhoIam
Ther
e’snowayt
ohol
diti
n
Nomor
ehi
dingwhoIwannabe
Thi
sisme”Isi
ngatsomepoi
ntI
’
m
mov
ingar
oundt
hest
ageabi
tandIcan
f
eel
thesong.WhenIf
ini
sht
her
e’s
si
l
encemyhear
tsi
nks.Idi
dn’
tsi
ngwel
l
notev
encheer
ingny
ana.JustasI
’
m st
il
l
i
nthoset
hought
sthescr
eamsof
cheer
ing,
whi
stl
esandcl
appi
nghands
f
il
lst
her
oom.Ismi
l
eandbowdownmy
head
“
Thatwasbeaut
if
ulMi
racl
e”say
s
Londi
siz
we.
Ev
ery
onesi
ngwear
enowwai
ti
ngf
or
t
hej
udgest
omaket
hedeci
sions.
“
Youdi
dwel
lmybaby
”mymom
squeez
esmei
nherar
ms
“
Andshe’
sgoi
ngt
owi
n”Mom Zosay
s
asshepul
l
smeonherar
ms.
“
Comeonguy
sIknowt
haty
oul
oveme
buty
oudon’
thav
etodot
hat
.Ot
herki
ds
sangwel
ltoo.IknowIdon’
tst
anda
chancet
owi
nbutIdon’
tcar
ebecauseI
hadsomuchf
unandI
tmademecome
t
oadeci
siont
hati
t’
sti
meIpur
suemy
si
ngi
ngcar
eer
”Theyal
lcheer
sforme
whi
l
ewear
eint
hatmomentwear
e
cal
l
edi
nsi
de.I
t’
sti
met
oannouncet
he
wi
nner
.
“
Greet
ingsev
ery
one”wegr
eetback
“
Wel
lI’
m sur
eev
ery
oneknowsme,
I’
m
Nkosi
sthandi
l
eMngomez
ulu.Iwantt
o
t
hankev
ery
onewhomadet
heseev
enta
success.YouknowwhenIt
hought
aboutt
hisi
deaIdi
dn’
tthoughti
twoul
d
bet
hisbi
g.Hai
chatshameSAhav
e
t
alentj
eal
ousdowncanwegi
veour
cont
est
ant
sar
oundofappl
ause”we
cl
apourhands.
“
Weal
lknowt
hatt
her
e’sonl
yone
wi
nnerbutmy
sel
fandj
udgesmadea
deci
siont
hatwewi
l
lhav
ethef
ir
st&
secondr
unnerupt
hent
hewi
nner
”
Ev
ery
onecheer
s
“
Thef
ir
standsecondr
unnerupwi
l
lget
40kt
henourwi
nnerwi
l
lget50kanda
r
ecor
ddeal
.Soher
eitgoes.Thesecond
r
unnerupi
sNont
obekoJax
a”scr
eams
ofj
oyf
il
lst
her
oom
“
Thef
ir
str
unnerupi
sThembeka
Mkhi
ze”onceagai
nther
oom er
upt
s
wi
thscr
eamsofj
oy
“
Whowant
stoguesswhoourwi
nner
i
s?”
“
Mir
acl
e!Mi
racl
e!Mi
racl
e!”Ev
ery
one
chantwowI
’
m soov
erwhel
medIdon’
t
ev
enknowhowt
ofeel
.
“
Wel
lourwi
nneri
s,Mi
raMt
himkhul
u!”I
f
reez
eforamoment
,she’
sjoki
ngr
ight
?I
can’
tbeawi
nnerImeanno.I
’
m br
ought
backbyscr
eamsofmyf
ami
l
ynex
tto
meIdon’
tknowwhendi
dtheycame
her
e.
“
Youwonbaby
!”Mom say
swi
thso
muchj
oyi
nherv
oiceandsqueez
esme
i
nherar
ms.OkaynowI
’
m cr
ying.Mom
Zo,
GuguandLwenkosi
hugsme.
“
Mir
aoutoft
he50cont
est
ant
syouar
e
t
hewi
nnerhowdoest
hatmakey
ouf
eel
”
asksMr
sMngomez
ulu
“
Happy
”Icr
y
“
Ohshe’
ssoemot
ional
rightnow.
Congr
atul
ati
onsMi
raMt
himkhul
u”I
wi
pemyt
ear
sandt
aket
hemi
c
“
Iwantt
othankmyf
ami
l
y,who
suppor
tedmet
hroughoutt
his
compet
it
ionandbel
i
evedmei
nme.You
ar
eguy
sar
ethebest
.Ial
sot
hank
ev
ery
onewhoputal
lthei
rener
gyand
y
ouMr
sMngomez
uluf
orsuchagr
eat
oppor
tuni
tyt
oshowcaseourt
alent
s.
Ngi
yabonga.
”(Thanks)Thepi
ctur
esar
e
t
akenandev
ery
thi
ng.I
t’
sreal
l
y
ov
erwhel
ming.Ican’
tbel
i
evet
hatI
’
m
huggi
ngaboMr
sMngomez
ulu,
Mr
Mawekhel
omuz
iSi
thol
e,Kel
l
yKhumal
o
andVusi
Nov
a.Iwi
l
lnev
erwashmy
dr
essandIwon’
tbat
hfor3day
s.Af
ter
ev
ery
thi
ngMr
sMngomez
uluof
fer
sto
t
akeust
oherdaught
eri
nlaw’
s
r
est
aur
antComeon,
Let
’sEat
!It
’sal
lon
her
,justt
ocel
ebr
ate.MrSi
thol
ecoul
dn’
t
j
oinushi
swi
fei
snotf
eel
i
ngwel
lsohe
hadt
orushbackathome.
“
She’
shasabeaut
if
ulv
oice”say
sMr
s
Mngomez
ulu
“
Ngi
yambongel
a”mom say
s
“
Youhav
ebeaut
if
uley
esMi
ra”
”
Thanky
ou”
“
Howl
onghav
eyoubeenbl
i
nd?
”
“
Foral
most19y
ear
sofmyl
i
fe”
“
Shewasbor
nbl
i
nd”mom adds
“
She’
sbeaut
if
uli
t’
sapi
tymyl
astbor
nis
15y
ear
sngabesengi
thol
eumakot
i”
Lwenkosi
clear
shi
sthr
oat
sandweal
l
l
augh
“
OhI
’
m sor
rycuddl
ecakeswakhe”The
conv
ersat
ionf
lowsandwet
alkabout
meet
ingagai
nnex
tweekandt
alkabout
myr
ecor
ddeal
.Af
terourl
unchwel
eav
e,
wedr
opGuguof
ffi
rstandIpr
omi
seher
t
hatwoul
dspentt
imet
oget
her
t
omor
rowbef
orewel
eav
eforkz
n.Dad
cal
l
smeandcongr
atul
atemesoIguess
hewat
chedt
heshowanduncl
eSoxt
oo.
“
ThatwasSox
”it
’sar
ound8pm now
Lwenkosi
andIar
ecuddl
i
ngi
nhi
sroom,
t
hemot
her
sandSnor
eti
redbedear
ly
t
heywer
esot
ir
ed.
“
Whatdoeshewant
?”
“
Hewascongr
atul
ati
ngme”
“
Youneedt
ofi
ndanewchauf
feur
,I
don’
tli
kehi
m”
“
Why
?”
“
Hemanhandl
edme.
”
“
What
,when?
”
“
Thatsameday
,IcamebackIcoul
dn’
t
gobuthedi
dn’
tletmei
n.Heki
ckedme
out
”Jesus!
“
Hedi
dn’
ttel
lme,
I’
m sor
ry”
“
Ideser
vedi
tthough,
Ishoul
dn’
thav
e
l
efty
ousweet
hear
t.Iwanty
out
oknow
t
hatI
’
m sor
rybaby
.Iknowi
t’
shar
dfor
y
oubabyandIf
ull
yunder
stand.I
t’
sal
so
har
dnaki
miDol
l
face.Thi
sal
lnewt
ome,
Ihav
enev
erbeeni
nasi
tuat
ionl
i
ket
his
bef
ore.Il
ovey
ouandIdon’
twantt
o
hur
tyou,
att
hesamet
imeNandi
is
car
ryi
ngmychi
l
d,i
t’
sjustamess!
”He
gr
oansIcanheari
nhi
svoi
cet
hatt
hisi
s
r
eal
l
ytaki
ngi
t’
stol
lonhi
m
“
I’
m sor
ryLwenkosi
buty
our
eal
l
yhur
t
me.I
t’
sli
keNandi
comesf
ir
stt
oyou
andmi
naI
’
m not
hingnj
ecozIai
n’
t
car
ryi
ngy
ourchi
l
d.Ican’
tcompet
ewi
th
t
hatLwandl
elwenkosi
it’
stoomuchf
or
me.
”
“
It
’snotacompet
it
ionst
handwasami
.I
l
oveonl
yyouandIr
eal
i
zemymi
stake.
Youar
emyf
ir
stpr
ior
it
yokayal
way
s.
Pl
easef
orgi
vemeMaShwabada”
“
I’
m sor
ry,
Ican’
t”
“
Please”Hesay
swi
thanal
mostcr
ying
v
oice,
Ilaugh
“
Yousuchababynawe!
”
“
It
’sal
lyourwor
k,y
oumakemeweak!
”
Hegr
oans
“
Ican’
tst
aymadaty
ouf
orev
er.Il
ove
y
ou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo,
youmademepr
oud
t
odayandIknewy
ouwoul
dsoIbr
ought
y
ousomet
hing”Hel
etmel
oseandget
s
upt
hencomesbackt
osi
tnex
tme.
“
Her
e”
“
Whati
sit
?”It
aket
hesmal
lbox
“
It
’sabr
acel
et”Iopent
heboxandt
ake
outt
hebr
acel
etandt
ouchandf
eel
it,
it’
s
hassmal
lhear
tsandhas“
Mir
acl
eSea”
engr
avedoni
t.
“
Ohbaby
,it
’sbeaut
if
ul.Il
ovei
t”
“
Ial
sohav
emi
nei
tssamel
i
key
our
s.I
t’
s
oursy
mbol
ofl
ovef
oreachot
her
”
“
Thanky
ousomuchLwandl
elwenkosi
”
Asi
ngl
etearescapemyey
eandhe
st
opsi
tfr
om r
oll
i
ngwi
thhi
sfi
nger
.
“
Don’
tcr
y”
“
Pleasehel
pmeputi
tin”HedoasIsay
t
henweki
sspassi
onat
elyourt
ongues
danci
ngi
neachot
her
’smout
h.Ican
hearourbr
eat
hinghi
tchi
ng.Hi
shands
ar
ecar
essi
ngmyt
highst
hatar
ebar
ely
cov
eredasI
’
m wear
ingpaj
amashor
t.I
m
get
ti
ngwetdownt
her
e,Iwanthi
m as
muchashewanthi
m.If
iddl
eforhi
st-
shi
rtandpushi
tuphel
pinghi
mtot
ake
i
tof
fandr
unmyf
inger
sti
psonhi
sbar
e
chestgoi
ngdownt
ohi
scr
otcht
hensl
i
d
myhandi
nhi
spant
s.Thef
eel
ofhi
s
peni
sgr
owi
nghar
disi
ncr
easi
ngl
y
gr
owi
ngmydesi
re.
“
Iwanty
ousobadbaby
”Hegr
oans
agai
nstmyl
i
ps
“
Iwanty
out
oobutdoy
ouhav
e
condoms”Mymom war
nedmeI
’
m not
aboutt
omaket
hatmi
stakeoff
all
i
ng
pr
egnantnow.I
nfactIdon’
twantababy
Ican’
tbr
inganI
nnocentsoul
int
his
wor
ldknowi
ngt
hatIwon’
tbeabl
eto
t
akecar
eofi
t.NoI
’
mfi
net
hanky
ou,
I’
m
ababymy
sel
f.
“
NoIwi
l
lbuymor
ningaf
terpi
l
ls
t
omor
rowIpr
omi
sey
oust
handwasami
.
Ij
ustwannaf
eel
you”
“
Okay
”Hedev
our
smyl
i
psl
i
ket
hewor
ld
i
sendi
ngaswehel
peachot
herwi
th
undr
essi
ng.Thef
eel
ofhi
swar
m body
agai
nstmi
nei
spur
ebl
i
ss.Heki
ssesmy
neckandsucksoni
tgoi
ngdownt
omy
boobs.Icanf
eel
inex
plai
nabl
ethi
ngs
bui
l
dingupal
lov
ermywhol
ebody
.He
cupsmyboobsi
nhi
spal
msandgr
oans
“
Isof
ucki
ngy
ourboobs”Hi
stounge
ex
plor
esev
eryI
nchofmybr
east
causi
ngmet
owhi
mper
.Myni
ppl
esar
e
mysensi
ti
vespot
,heci
rcl
eshi
stounge
ar
oundandsuckl
eonmyni
ppl
eli
kea
st
arv
ingbaby
.Hemov
est
otheot
her
boobandgi
vesi
tat
tent
iont
oowi
thhi
s
t
ongueandt
eet
h.Ibi
temyt
ounget
ryi
ng
t
ost
if
lemymoansbutt
hepl
easur
eit
’s
unbear
abl
e.Hepl
acesonel
egonhi
s
shoul
derandex
hal
eawar
m br
eat
hon
mysl
i
t,Igaspathowgoodi
t’
sfeel
s.He
swi
rl
shi
stoungei
nci
rcl
esandpl
unges
i
tdeepl
appi
ngupmyj
uicest
henf
li
ck
t
het
ipofhi
stoungeatmycl
i
t.
“
YhoooLwenkosi
kumnandi
don’
tst
op
pl
easeee”Ihol
dhi
sheadi
npl
acegai
nst
mymoundwhi
l
etheot
herhandi
s
cl
enchi
ngont
hecov
ersoft
hebed.
“
Don’
tbel
oudbabyt
hemoms”
”
I’
m sor
ry”Iwhi
spergoshIdon’
tthi
nkI
woul
dbeabl
etocont
rol
mymoans.
Eachf
li
ckofhi
stonguesendsabl
i
ssf
ul
j
oltofecst
asyi
nsi
deofme.
“
Cum babycum f
orme”Hesay
sagai
nst
mycl
i
tandt
hev
ibr
ati
onofhi
swor
ds
sendsmeov
ert
heedgeIf
eel
awav
eof
pur
ebl
i
sspl
uset
hroughmybodyand
r
idemycum outonhi
sface.Heki
sses
hi
swayupt
omymout
handpl
ungi
ng
hi
stoungei
nmymout
hlet
ti
ngmet
o
t
ast
etmy
sel
f.
“
Iwi
l
lbegent
lyokay
”Inodbi
ti
ngmyl
i
p,
her
ubshi
msel
fagai
nstmyengor
ged
cl
i
tandsl
i
dehi
sdi
cki
nsi
deofmeandI
wi
ncewi
thpai
n.
“
Rel
axi
twoul
dhur
tabi
t”okaynowI
’
m
scar
ed
“
Real
l
y?”
“
YesbutIwi
ltr
ymybestt
obegent
ly”I
nodmyhear
tisbeat
inghar
d.Hepushes
i
nagai
nIscr
eam
“
I’
m sor
ryI
’
m al
mostt
her
ebaby
”
“
Arey
ousur
eyouput
ti
ngi
tint
her
ight
hol
e”
“
Yesbabypl
easet
rustme”Hepr
esses
hi
shandonmymout
handt
hrusthar
d.I
bi
tehi
shandasIscr
eam i
nagony
.
”
I’
minbaby
..I
’
minaski
esne”Hewi
pes
myt
ear
sbutt
heykeepf
all
i
ngont
he
si
desofmyf
ace.Hest
art
smov
ingy
hoo
i
t’
sfeel
sli
ker
azor
sar
esl
i
cingmy
v
agi
na.
“
Kubuhl
unguLwandl
elwenkosi
”(i
ts
hur
ts)Icr
y
“
I’
m sor
rymyl
oveuhhhhhh”Hegr
owl
s
pumpi
ngonme.Hi
spacei
sgr
owi
ng
har
dIcan’
tst
opmyt
ear
sbuthe’
s
enj
oyi
nghi
msel
fgr
oani
ngl
i
kea
woundedani
mal
.Cant
hisbeov
er
al
ready
!
“
AhhhmyMi
ra!
!Youar
esogood!Fuck
OhhhIl
ovey
ouMi
rawami
.OhShi
i
t!!
”
“
Khawul
amanj
e”(
stopi
tnow)
“
Justasecondbaby
”Hi
ssecondt
urns
outt
obeawhi
l
e.Laphoangsaf
uni
lut
ho!
Atl
asthegr
oansl
oudl
yconv
ulsi
ngon
t
opofmeasheempt
yhi
sseedi
nsi
deof
me.
Ohbabyt
hanky
ousomuch”Hesay
s
pant
ingashecol
l
apsesont
opofme.
“
Getof
fmeme”Hepul
l
soutandIwi
nce
“
I’
m sor
ry”Ican’
tev
enmov
ehepul
l
sme
t
ohi
sar
msandcomf
ortasIcr
y
“
Youmakemef
eel
li
keIf
orcedmy
sel
f
ony
oubaby
”
“
Noy
oudi
dn’
tpl
easedon’
tfeel
li
ket
hat
i
tjustt
hatInev
erex
pect
edi
ttobel
i
ke
t
hisl
etal
onepai
nful
”
“
Sshhhi
twi
l
lgetbet
terwi
tht
imey
ou
woul
dsee”
“
Uyany
aI’
m nev
erdoi
ngt
hisev
eragai
n!”
Hel
aughsangki
ssesmyf
orehead.
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”
CHAPTER20

Thepai
nIf
eel
int
hedept
hofmyhear
t
andsoul
isnotmeasur
abl
e.Somany
t
hingsar
ehappeni
ngatt
hesamet
ime,
I
don’
tknowwhatt
odo.Nomat
terhowI
t
ryt
ost
ayst
rong,
I’
m unabl
etobeart
he
pai
nnow.Ican’
tcont
rol
myt
ear
s
any
mor
e,Ineedsomeonet
ohol
dme
t
ight
,pr
otectme,
andkeepmesaf
ebut
t
hatper
sonhasdi
sappear
edonme
wi
thoutat
race.Idi
sappoi
ntedhi
mI
knowandI
’
m al
sodi
sappoi
ntedi
n
my
sel
f.Iwi
shl
i
fehadar
ever
sebut
ton,
I
’
drev
ersemyl
i
feandmaket
her
ight
choi
ces.Iwasbl
i
ndedbyl
ove,
thel
ove
t
hatwasnev
err
eci
procat
ed.

Li
feshasal
way
sbeenaconst
ant
st
ruggl
eforme,
Inev
erknewmypar
ent
s.
Mom l
eftmeandmyt
winbr
otherwi
th
ourgr
andmot
herwhenwewer
efew
mont
hsol
dtof
indj
obbutshenev
er
camebackf
orus.Ourgr
andmot
heroh
myhersoul
RestI
nPeace,
shewasour
pi
l
larofst
rengt
h.Shegav
eusl
i
fewi
th
t
hel
i
ttl
ethatshehadandIwi
l
lfor
ever
begr
atef
ult
oherf
oruncondi
ti
onal
lov
e
f
orus.If
eel
greatsadnessi
nmyhear
t
t
hatshel
eftusbef
oreIev
engota
chancet
omakeherpr
oudandt
hankher
f
orev
ery
thi
ngshehasdonef
orus.I
guessheav
encoul
dn’
twai
tforher
.

If
eel
li
keIhav
ethi
sdar
kcl
oudhov
eri
ng
al
lov
erme.Ican’
tseem t
okeeppeopl
e
i
nmyl
i
fe.Theyex
itmyl
i
fel
i
keInev
er
mat
ter
edt
othem.Mymot
herl
eftme
whenIwasj
ustf
ewmont
hsol
d.
Lwandl
elef
tmef
orabl
i
ndgi
rl
,myt
win
br
otherI
nnocentl
eftmej
ustl
i
ket
hat
,
nowi
t’
smygr
andmot
her
.Ihav
enoone
el
senowbutt
hisbabygr
owi
ngi
nmy
t
ummy
,whoknowsmay
bei
twi
l
lal
so
v
ani
sht
ooj
ustl
i
keev
ery
oneel
se.Si
gh!

Ther
etheyar
einf
rontofme,
int
hisbi
g
f
latscr
een.Hol
dinghandsont
hest
age.
I
t’
sabi
tt
erpi
l
ltoswal
l
owbutI
’
m must
sayt
heyl
ookgoodt
oget
her
.She’
s
beaut
if
ul,
wit
hherbr
ownhaz
eley
est
hat
compl
i
ment
sherf
lawl
essmel
ani
nski
n.
Herbody
conbl
ackkneedr
essi
s
huggi
nghercur
vesgl
ori
ousl
yandt
hose
l
egs,
ohshehassex
ylongl
egsI
’
dki
l
lto
hav
ethosel
egsnott
heseneedl
esIhav
e.
It
hinksheknowsshehassex
ylegs
becausesheal
way
swear
sshor
tcl
othes
t
oex
poset
hem.Eachanev
erysoci
al
net
wor
kLwandl
ehas,
she’
sther
e,f
rom
What
sApp,
Facebook,
Twi
tt
ert
o
I
nst
agr
am.Theyar
esoi
nlov
eev
ena
bl
i
ndper
sonl
i
kehercoul
dseet
hat
.I
won’
tpr
etendt
hati
t'
snothur
ti
ngme
becausei
t’
sis.Il
oveLwandl
elwenkosi
somuchandi
t’
shur
tst
hatIcan’
thav
e
hi
m back.I
’
m notev
enaboutt
ost
artt
o
compet
ewi
thher
,she’
swayt
oo
beaut
if
ult
hanme,
she’
scompl
ete,
comi
ngf
rom awel
ltodof
ami
l
yli
kehi
m
andshe’
saboutt
obeacel
ebr
it
ynow
andI
naf
ewy
ear
sLwandl
ewoul
dbea
cel
ebr
it
ytoo.Theyar
ejustper
fectf
or
eachot
herandme?OhpoormeIwi
l
lbe
st
uckher
erai
singhi
schi
l
dwi
thnot
hing
butmymat
ri
ccer
ti
fi
cat
e.

I
’
m onmyf
our
thgl
assofwi
newhenI
hearabuz
zer
.Iwonderwhot
hatcoul
d
be,
I’
m al
lal
oneMrNkosi
wentt
ofet
ch
hi
smamaf
rom KZNandMr
sNkosi
wentwi
thherchi
l
drent
oJohannesbur
g
t
osuppor
tNor
ahont
hesi
ngi
ng
compet
it
ion.Idr
agmy
sel
fandgot
o
at
tendwhoev
eri
svi
sit
ing.I
’
m sur
pri
sed
t
oseemyf
ri
end,
Nel
l
yst
andi
ngonmy
door
stepImeanMr
sNkosi
’
sdoor
step.

“
Fri
i
eeennnd!
”Shescr
eams,
that
'sNel
l
y
f
ory
ou
“
Nel
l
ywhatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e”she
pushesherwayi
nwi
thoutme
wel
comi
ngheri
n.
“
Yuuumangani
wami
whatanupgr
ade
f
rom 3r
oom houset
othi
smansi
on.
GoshIsowi
sht
obey
our
ightnow!
”She
say
sroami
ngherey
esar
oundt
he
ki
tchen,
Irol
lmyey
es.
“
Comet
hissi
de”Il
eadt
hewayt
othe
l
oungeandt
akemygl
asst
hensi
tdown.
She’
slooki
ngatmel
i
keIhav
egr
own
hor
ns.Iupt
hev
olumeasIsi
ponmy
wi
ne.Shet
akest
hegl
assf
rom me
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ng!
”
“
Dri
nki
ngduh”Ir
oll
myey
es
“
Youar
epr
egnantI
nnocent
ia”
“
Don'
tcal
lmet
hat
!”Idon’
tli
kemyr
eal
name,
dontaskmewhybecauseIal
so
don’
tknowormay
beIj
usthat
ethef
act
t
hatmymom gav
emet
hatname.Ihat
e
ev
ery
thi
ngt
hatgott
odowi
tht
hat
woman.Howcanshel
eav
eusl
i
ket
hat
?
Whodoest
hat
?Whydi
dshekeptusi
n
t
hef
ir
stpl
ace?Sheshoul
dhav
eabor
ted
usonceandf
oral
l
!Nel
l
ysi
tsnex
ttome
anddr
inkmywi
ne.
“
Mmmht
hist
ast
ever
yni
cemustbe
ex
pensi
ve”It
ookoneofMrNkosi
’
s
ex
pensi
vewi
ne,
Iwi
l
ldenyany
knowl
edgei
fitshoul
dhenot
icet
hatone
ofhi
sbot
tl
esofwi
nei
smi
ssi
ngpl
usI
’
m
pr
egnant
.
“
Giv
emywi
neback”
“
Heyy
ouar
epr
egnanty
oushoul
dn’
tbe
dr
inki
ng”
“
Idon’
twantt
hisbabyNel
l
y,y
ouknow
t
hat
”It
akemygl
assbutshepul
l
sit
away
.Myl
i
fei
samessal
readyIdon’
t
wantababy
!
“
Don'
tbest
upi
dwena,
can'
tyouseet
his
babyi
syourmeal
ticket
!Youneedt
his
babyNandi
”
“
Thi
sbabyi
sgoi
ngt
ocompl
i
cat
emyl
i
fe
mor
eNel
l
y.Lwandl
elwenkosi
doesnot
l
oveme,
lookathi
m?He’
shappywi
th
Nor
ah!
”Shel
ooksatt
het
vscr
een,
Lwandl
eisal
lov
erhi
sbl
i
ndgi
rl
.They
hav
ejustannouncedt
hewi
nnerandshe
won.
“
Hai
sukamaanst
opwhi
ningandwear
y
ourbi
ggi
rlpant
ies!Youar
epr
egnant
wi
thhi
schi
l
dhebel
ongst
oyou.Doy
ou
l
ovehi
m?”
“
Ofcour
seIdobutIcannev
ercompet
e
wi
thher
.She’
sbeaut
if
ulhav
eal
lthe
cur
vesi
nther
ightpl
acesont
opoft
hat
she’
saboutt
obeacel
ebr
it
y.I
'
m anugl
y
ski
nnygi
rlwi
thaf
latassandneedl
e
l
egsont
opoft
hatI
'
m poor
”
“
Babyy
ouar
ebeaut
if
ulony
ourown
speci
alway
.Youar
ecar
ryi
nghi
sfi
rst
babyuset
hatt
oyouradv
ant
ageandy
ou
ar
eli
vi
ngwi
thhi
m undert
hesamer
oom.
Fi
ghtf
ory
ourmangi
rl
!”
“
Hedoesn’
tlov
emehecan’
tev
en
pr
etendNel
l
y.I
’
mjusthi
sbabymamat
o
hi
m.I
’
m nev
ergoi
ngt
owi
n”
“
Youcanwi
nify
oupl
ayy
ourcar
dsr
ight
y
ouar
etheonewhoi
sli
vi
ngher
ewi
th
hi
m nother
.Youar
etheonewho’
s
car
ryi
nghi
sfi
rstchi
l
duset
hatgi
rl
y!
”
“
Hispar
ent
stookmei
nandgav
emea
home.Idon’
twantt
ocauset
roubl
eand
t
heyar
ereal
l
yni
cepeopl
ewhatwasI
goi
ngt
odoaboutmygr
andmot
her
’s
f
uner
ali
fitwasn’
tfort
hem”TheNkosi
car
ri
edal
lthecostf
ormy
gr
andmot
her
’sbur
ial
.MayGodbl
ess
t
hem.Nel
l
ylaughsl
i
ker
eal
l
ylaughsand
Idon’
tknowwhati
samusi
ngabout
whatIj
ustsai
d.
“
Eywenadon’
tbeaf
ool
!Doy
out
hink
t
heyt
ooky
oui
nbecauset
heyar
egood
peopl
e?Hel
lno!Ri
chpeopl
edon’
tcar
e
aboutus,
thepoor
,theyonl
ycar
eabout
t
hemsel
ves.Theyt
ooky
oui
nbecause
y
ouar
ecar
ryi
ngt
hei
rgr
andchi
l
d.Zol
eka
i
soutt
her
ebusysuppor
ti
ngt
hatbl
i
nd
gi
rlandl
efty
ouher
eal
oneandpr
egnant
I
nnocent
ia.She’
scl
earaboutwher
eshe
st
ands.WhybecauseMi
rai
sri
chl
i
ke
t
hem,
shewon’
tbet
hei
rbur
denunl
i
ke
y
ou.Theydon’
tcar
e!Noonecar
es,
you
hav
etosecur
eyourpl
acei
n
Lwandl
elwenkosi
.He’
stheonl
yonewho
canmaket
hem l
ovey
ou.He’
stheonl
y
onewhocanmaket
hem car
efory
ou.
Youneedt
ofi
ghtgi
rl
,don’
tlett
hisbl
i
nd
gi
rlt
akey
ourman.Wi
th
Lwandl
elwenkosi
byy
oursi
dei
twi
l
lal
l
bewel
l
.Ayangekechomeeuhl
ulwei
nto
engaboni
angi
vumi
!”Shef
uri
ousl
ygul
p
downt
hegl
assofwi
neasIt
hinkof
whatshej
ustsai
d.Shehasapoi
nt,
t
hesepeopl
eonl
ycar
eaboutt
hei
r
gr
andchi
l
dnotme.Whatwi
l
lhappent
o
mewhenIgi
vebi
rt
h?Whati
ftheyt
ake
mybabyandt
hrowmeout
?

“
Whodoeshet
hinkhei
shuh!Tocancel
onl
astmi
nut
e!”Ishr
iekwi
thanger
“
I’
m sor
rybossV”
“
Idon’
tunder
standSpi
der
,whyi
shenot
i
nter
est
ednowal
loft
hesudden.Thi
s
guywasv
erykeent
owor
kwi
thuswhat
i
fhei
swor
kingwi
thsomeonet
oget
i
nfor
mat
ion”
“
Iwoul
dhav
eknownt
hough,
youknowI
nev
ermi
sssuchi
nfor
mat
ionmay
behe
gotani
cerof
fert
hanwhatwear
e
of
fer
ing”
“
May
be?Youshoul
dhav
eaanswerby
now!
”
“
Youneedt
ocal
m down,
Ipr
omi
sei
f
he’
supt
osomet
hingIwi
l
lfi
ndoutand
wewi
l
ldeal
wit
hhi
m”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
eveIdi
dn’
tgot
o
Johannesbur
gtosuppor
tmymy
daught
erbecauseoft
hismeet
ingand
hehadt
ocancel
now!
“Igul
pdownmy
whi
skeyandbangt
hegl
assont
hegl
ass
t
abl
e.
“
Yout
oldmeaboutt
hat
,I’
mreal
l
ysor
ry
butatl
eastwecanwat
chi
t”Ichuckl
e
“
We?Youshoul
dbeoutt
her
efi
ndi
ng
outwhatt
hisMrCez
aisupt
o.Icanf
eel
t
hatsomet
hingi
snotr
ightbutIt
rust
ed
y
ourj
udgement
,lookwhati
shappeni
ng
now”
“
Don’
twor
ryIwi
l
lbeoni
tnow.Just
r
elaxIwi
l
lfi
xthi
s,Ipr
omi
sey
ou.Ihav
e
nev
erl
ety
oudown”
“
Iknowgo”Hegul
pdownhi
swhi
skey
andget
sup
“
Sur
ebossV”
“
Shar
p”Hemakeshi
swayout
.

Spi
derandIgetal
ongv
erywel
landhe’
s
t
heonl
yguyt
hatIt
rust
.Wehav
ebeen
wor
kingt
oget
herf
ory
ear
s.I
t’
ssaf
eto
saywe’
rel
i
kebr
other
snow.Hegotmy
backandIgothi
sback.Iownf
ew
busi
nessesandat
rucki
ngcompanyt
o
cl
eanmymoney
.Mostoft
hemoney
t
hatImakei
sfr
om ot
heri
l
li
cit
busi
nessest
hatIown,
whi
char
e
pr
ost
it
uti
on,
moneyl
aunder
ing,
il
legal
weaponanddr
ugs.Ii
nher
it
edal
lof
t
hesebusi
nessf
rom amanIwi
l
lal
way
s
r
espect
,wel
ltheyar
enotmi
neal
one
Nomai
sal
somypar
tnerbutshe’
sa
si
l
encepar
tner
.Herf
atheri
stheone
whoownedt
hesebusi
nesses.Weuset
o
f
uckbackt
henbef
oreIev
enmetBr
enda
myexl
atewi
fe.I
t’
swasj
ustsexunt
il
shemetmybestf
ri
end,
Mbongi
seni
who
i
snowherhusband.Ofcour
semywi
fe
andMbongi
seni
doesn’
tknowt
hatand
wel
i
ket
okeepi
tthatway
.It
’snot
necessar
yreal
l
yfort
hem t
oknow.Ihat
e
t
alki
ngaboutmypastbutsi
nceIhav
e
st
art
edt
her
apywi
thKhany
isl
i
le,
I’
m
sl
owl
yget
ti
nguset
oopeni
ngupabout
myemot
ions.Ihav
enev
erbeent
heone
t
oshar
emyf
eel
i
ngsev
ersi
nceIwas
y
oung.Iwast
oldbymyl
ateuncl
ethata
mannev
ershowweaknesshemustbe
st
rongal
lthet
ime.I
t’
sbeenal
mosta
mont
hnowsi
nceIst
art
edt
her
apyandI
t
hinki
t’
shel
pingbecauseev
eryt
imeI
comebackf
rom Khany
iIf
eel
thel
oad
onmyshoul
der
sget
ti
ngl
i
ght
erand
l
i
ght
erev
ery
day
.Shemademer
eal
i
ze
t
hatt
her
ear
eway
stodeal
wit
hanger
i
nst
eadofbeat
ingupt
heper
sonnex
tto
y
ou.

Ihav
efoundabet
terwayt
odeal
wit
h
myangerandt
hati
sapunchi
ngbag.I
t
urnedoneoft
heguestr
oomsagy
m.
Whenev
erI
’
m angr
y,Igot
omygy
m and
r
eleaseal
lmyf
rust
rat
ionandangeron
t
hepunchi
ngbag.Ihav
en’
tlai
dmyhand
onmywi
feev
ersi
ncet
hatdayIf
ound
herwi
tht
hatman,
it’
sbeen3weeksnow.
I
’
m gl
adwet
alkedaf
tert
hesi
l
ence
t
reat
mentf
ort
woweeks.Idon’
twantt
o
hur
thernomor
e,Il
ovehersomuch.
Bongai
stheonl
ywomanwhohasev
er
l
ovedmef
orwhoIam.She’
stheonl
y
womanwhohasbeenwi
thmebecause
shel
ovesme.Theonl
ywomanwho
car
esaboutmeandt
heonl
ywoman
whohasnev
erl
eftmysi
denomat
ter
howani
mal
i
sti
cIbecome.I
’
m so
ashamedt
oadmi
tthatI
’
m amonst
er
l
i
kemyf
ather
.It
’si
roni
chowIhat
ehi
m
wi
thapassi
onf
orev
ery
thi
nghedi
dyetI
f
oll
owedonhi
sfoot
stepsandIhat
e
my
sel
ffort
hat
!Thi
nki
ngaboutt
he
t
hingst
hatmandi
dtomymot
herandus
makesmeangr
yal
lthet
ime.Enough
aboutt
het
hingst
hatmakesmychest
pai
nsandl
etmewat
chmybabygi
rl
si
ngi
ng.It
urnupt
hev
olume.Ohshehas
suchabeaut
if
ulv
oice,
Iwon’
tli
eIt
doesn’
tsi
twel
lwi
thmet
hatshehasa
boy
fri
endnowbutIt
hinkIl
i
ket
hisNkosi
boy
.Heseemst
obev
eryi
nlov
eand
pr
otect
iveofher
,that
’saki
ndof
boy
fri
endIwantf
ormydaught
er.Iknew
shewoul
dtaket
hewi
n!Ical
lherand
congr
atul
atehert
hent
alkt
omywi
fef
or
awhi
l
e.
“
Imi
ssy
ouguy
s,t
hishousei
slonel
y
wi
thouty
ou”
“
Wemi
ssy
out
oo,
tomor
rowaf
ter
noon
wear
ether
edon’
twor
ry.Ar
eyout
aki
ng
goodcar
eofy
our
sel
f”Ismi
l
e
“
YesI
’
mtaki
nggoodcar
eofmy
sel
f
st
handwasami
”Iheart
hebuz
zer
“
Someonei
satt
hegat
eIwi
l
lcal
lyou
l
aterIl
ovey
ouokay
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Iknowshemeantev
ery
si
ngl
ewor
d,i
t’
sunbel
i
evabl
eaf
ter
ev
ery
thi
ngIhav
edonet
oher
.Herl
ove
encour
agesmet
obeabet
terman.I
hav
ehopet
hatonedayIwi
l
lbeabet
ter
manbecauseoft
hel
oveshehasf
orme.
Shenev
erdeser
vedt
hisf
rom t
hef
ir
st
pl
ace.I
’
m wi
l
li
ngt
odowhat
everi
t’
s
t
akesf
ormet
ochangemyway
sandbe
t
hemanshedeser
vesandt
hef
ather
Mi
radeser
ves.Di
dIment
iont
hatev
ery
Sundaynowwegot
ochur
chwi
tht
he
Nkosi
’
s,honest
lyInev
ert
houghtIwi
l
l
f
indmy
sel
finchur
chbutsur
pri
singl
yI’
m
enj
oyi
ng.Theonl
yper
sonwhoi
snot
enj
oyi
ngatal
li
sMi
ra,
she’
sal
way
s
doz
ingof
fandt
hatpi
sseshermot
her
of
f.I
t’
ssohi
l
ari
ouswhent
heyar
gue
abouti
t.IgetupasIhangupandgot
o
at
tendwhoev
eri
svi
sit
ing.Icoul
dn’
t
pr
epar
emy
sel
fforwhatI
’
m seei
ngr
ight
now.If
eel
mywhol
ebodyt
rembl
i
ngand
myphonesl
i
pst
hroughmyhandand
f
all
sdown.Af
teral
lthesey
ear
sIhav
e
nev
ert
houghtIwi
l
lseehi
sfaceagai
n.

“
Ndodana”(
son)Hesay
ssopol
i
tel
yand
t
hatf
uel
smyanger
“
Whatt
hef
uckar
eyoudoi
ngher
e!”
“
Iwantt
oapol
ogi
zemyson,
IknowI
wr
ongedy
ourmot
her
,youandy
our
si
ster
sI…”Ican’
tli
stent
othi
scr
apI
gr
abhi
m byhi
scol
l
arandpr
esshi
m
agai
nstt
hewal
l
“
Wronged?Youcal
lbeat
ingusup
wr
ongedhuh!
!”Iwantt
opunchhi
m but
somet
hingi
nsi
deofmest
opsme.
“
Getoutofmyhouseandnev
ercome
backher
e!!
”Idr
aghi
m out
sidet
hegat
e
andwal
kinsi
de.Ipourmy
sel
fagl
assof
wat
ert
ocal
m my
sel
fbuti
t’
spr
ovest
o
beami
ssi
on.I
tal
lcomecr
ashi
ngdown
l
i
keat
onofbr
icks.I
’
m goi
ngt
olosemy
mi
nd.It
akemycarkey
sanddr
iveof
fto
Khany
i’
spl
ace.I
mageskeeppl
ayi
ngi
n
myheadl
i
keamov
ieandt
ear
sar
e
bl
urr
ingmyey
es.Whati
shedoi
ngher
e?
Howdi
dhef
indme?Ishoul
dhav
eki
l
led
hi
m!Whydi
dn’
tIki
l
ledhi
m?Iwast
ryi
ng
t
odeal
wit
hev
ery
thi
ngst
epbyst
ept
hen
hehadt
ocomebackandt
akemeback
t
omyhor
ri
blechi
l
dhood.
“
Hey
”Shesay
sassheopenst
hedoor
f
orme.Iwantt
ogr
eetherbackbutI
hav
ethi
shugel
umpcl
oggi
ngi
nmy
t
hroat
.
“
Comeoni
n”Imakewayi
n
Doy
ouwantsomet
hingt
odr
ink”Ishake
myheadnoshest
udi
esmyf
aceand
t
akesmyhandt
henwal
ktol
oungewi
th
me.Wesi
tont
hesamecoucht
oget
her
.
“
Youar
eshaki
ng,
tal
ktome”
“
He.
.Hecamet
oseeme”Isaywi
tha
t
remul
ousv
oice
“
Who?
”Sheasks
“
Myf
ather
”
“
Andhowdoest
hatmakey
ouf
eel
?”
“
Angr
y,br
oken,
conf
used,
ever
ythi
ng!
”
“
Whatdi
dhesay
?”
“
Hewant
edt
oapol
ogi
ze,
cany
ou
bel
i
evehi
m!!Af
terev
ery
thi
ngheputus
t
hrough!Hecomesher
eandt
ell
met
hat
hewr
ongedus!
!Thatbul
l
shi
t!
!Inev
er
t
houghtIwi
l
lseehi
m ev
eragai
n.Seei
ng
hi
m br
oughtbackal
lthosememor
ies
andIf
eel
angerandpai
nrenewi
ng.
Ev
eryt
imewhenhecomesbackhome
dr
unkhewoul
dbeatusl
i
kewewer
eno
humansandt
hef
oll
owi
ngdayhe
cl
aimedt
onotr
emember
.It
’swasal
i
e,I
knowi
twasal
i
e!Heknewwhathewas
doi
ng.Ir
emembert
hisot
herdayhe
camebackhomedr
unkasusual
.He
f
orcedmom t
osl
eepwi
thhi
m butshe
r
efusedsohebeatherupunt
ilshe
coul
dn’
tmov
e.Il
osti
tandIbeathi
m
wi
thachai
rhepassedout
.Mom
shout
edatmet
hatIki
l
ledherhusband.
Idi
dn’
tunder
standhowshecoul
d
def
endhi
m.Thenex
tmor
ningIwas
wokenupbyhi
m atdawnwi
thahuge
sl
ap.Het
oldmet
ost
ri
pof
f,hehad
pr
epar
edacol
dwat
erwi
thi
cei
nabi
g
washi
ngbasi
n.Het
oldmet
ogeti
nunt
il
mybodywasnumbandshi
ver
ingt
hen
beatt
heshi
toutofme!Swear
ingatme
f
orbeat
inghi
m up.Iknewt
hati
twasa
l
i
ewhenhesayhecan’
tremember
.Asi
f
t
hatwasnotenoughheki
ckedmeout
oft
hehousei
nthoseweehour
soft
he
mor
ningnakedandbl
eedi
ng.Ir
eal
l
y
t
houghtIwasgoi
ngt
odi
ethatdayI
wokeupatt
hehospi
tal
.Hecamet
osee
meandt
hreat
enedt
oki
l
lmymom i
fI
dar
etel
lthedoct
orwhathappened.I
wassi
xteeny
ear
sonl
ysi
xteenKhany
i…”
Ichokeonmyt
ear
sandshe’
ssqueez
ing
myhandi
ntoher
str
yingt
ocal
m me
downasshel
ooksatmewi
thsomuch
pi
tyi
nherey
es
“
Aft
ermysi
ster
sranawayandt
hedeat
h
ofmymot
herIr
anaway
.Itwast
henor
nev
er.BabMadondowhowast
hemost
f
ear
edgangst
ert
ookmei
n.Hewas
l
i
vingwi
thhi
stwodaught
ersNoma,
my
wi
fe’
sfr
iendi
soneoft
hedaught
ers.I
st
art
edsel
l
ingweedf
orhi
m atschool
andmadesur
ethatInev
ergetcaught
.
WhatIl
i
keabouthi
mist
hathe
encour
agedmet
ogot
oschool
andpai
d
f
ormyf
ees.Onedayhi
senemi
esbr
oke
i
ntohi
shouseandt
heyki
l
ledhi
s
daught
er.Hewasbey
ondbr
okenhe
l
ovedhi
sdaught
ersandhemadea
pr
omi
set
ohi
swi
fet
hathewoul
d
pr
otectt
hem t
hedayshedi
ed.I
t’
swas
onl
ythenhegr
oomedmet
obet
his
har
dcor
egangst
ersot
hatIcanpr
otect
Nomaonedayshoul
dhedi
e.I
twasl
i
ke
heknewt
hathewasl
eftwi
thf
ew
mont
hst
oli
vehegotsi
ckf
oramont
h
t
henhewasgone.Ihadt
otookov
ert
he
r
opesandl
eadt
hegang.I
twasnev
er
easybutIf
oughthar
dtodayher
eIam
doi
ngex
act
lyt
hesamet
hingmyf
ather
di
dtoust
omywi
feanddaught
er.I
deser
vedev
ery
thi
ngt
hatmandi
dtome,
I
’
m amonst
erl
i
kehi
m”Il
etmyt
ear
s
f
low,
sheengul
fsmei
nherar
msand
comf
ort
sme
“
I’
m sosor
ryKhumal
onoonedeser
ve
t
hepai
nyouwentt
hrough.Youwer
ea
chi
l
dyouneededhi
spr
otect
ionandl
ove.
Wemi
ghtnotknowwhatwaspushi
ng
hi
m butbei
ngabusi
vei
sachoi
ce.You
coul
dhav
etur
nedy
oursi
tuat
iont
o
mot
ivat
eyout
obeabet
termant
hen
y
ourf
ather
.Justl
i
kei
twasachoi
cet
o
hi
mital
soachoi
cet
oyou,
whati
s
i
mpor
tantnowi
sthaty
ouacknowl
edge
y
ourmi
stakesandy
ouar
ewi
l
li
ngt
o
change.Ov
ert
hispastt
hreeweeksy
ou
hav
ebeendoi
nggr
eatKhumal
o.Youar
e
l
uckyy
ouhav
easuppor
ti
vef
ami
l
yand
sof
ary
ouar
epr
ovi
ngt
haty
our
eal
l
y
wantt
ochange.Yourf
atherr
esur
faci
ng
woul
dhel
pyout
odeal
wit
hthepai
nhe
puty
out
hroughandheal
.Itwi
l
lal
so
hel
pyouf
orgi
vey
our
sel
fforev
ery
thi
ng.
”
“
Ihat
ehi
mforwhathedi
dtousbutI
hat
emy
sel
fmor
eforf
oll
owi
nghi
s
f
oot
steps.I
’
m ahor
ri
bleper
sonIdon’
t
deser
vet
oli
ve”Shepul
l
smebackand
cupsmywetf
ace
“
Heyheydon’
tsayt
hat
,noonedeser
ves
t
odi
ebecausehemadewr
ongchoi
ces.
Youar
ehumanandy
oudeser
vea
secondchancej
ustl
i
keev
ery
oneel
se.
Forev
ery
onet
ogi
vey
ouasecond
chancey
ouneedgi
vey
our
sel
fasecond
chancef
ir
st.I
t’
sst
artwi
thy
ouKhumal
o”
“
Ican’
t”
“
Pleaset
ry,
I’
m beggi
ngy
ou”She
whi
sper
sst
ari
ngdeepi
ntomyey
est
hen
wi
pesmyt
ear
swi
thhert
humbs.Il
ook
downatherf
ull
li
ps,
hert
oungedar
tout
t
oli
ckatt
hem l
eav
ingagl
i
steni
ng
sheen.Iswal
l
owspi
tandi
nchcl
oserour
l
i
pst
ouches.Ipar
therl
i
pswi
thmy
t
oungeandki
ssher
.I’
m sur
pri
sedwhen
sheobl
i
gewi
thsomuchhunger
.If
eel
mydi
ckpumpi
ngwi
thbl
oodasi
tgr
ows
har
der
.She’
swear
ingadr
esswhi
ch
makesev
ery
thi
ngeasyf
ort
hebot
hus,
shel
aywi
thherbackont
hecouch
pul
l
ingmeont
opofher
.It
rav
elmy
handbet
weenherl
egsandf
eel
her
soakedpant
iest
henst
rokemyf
inger
s
under
neat
h,asof
tmoanescapesher
l
i
ps.
“
Youar
esowet
”
“
I’
m wetf
ory
oudaddyKhumz
”Herv
oice
i
sbut
ter
edwi
thar
ousal
,Iunbut
tonmy
pant
sandt
akeoutmyhar
ddi
ckt
hen
sl
i
dei
nherwi
thonepush.Shescr
eams
di
ggi
nghernai
l
sonmyar
ms.
“
Ahhhhf
ucky
ouar
esobi
g!”
“
Oohshi
t!
!”
Igr
owl
asshe’
scl
enchesher
wal
l
sar
oundmydi
cksot
ightt
hatIf
eel
l
i
keI
’
m goi
ngt
ocum r
ightnow.Ist
art
mov
ingi
nandoutofherf
uck!She
moansl
ouddi
ggi
nghernai
l
sdeeperon
myar
mst
hati
t’
shur
tsandt
hat
’sur
ging
meonIpumpi
ntoherdeephi
tt
ingt
he
backof
fherpussy
.Hermoanst
urns
i
ntocr
iesasIf
uckherhar
derandf
ast
er
t
aki
ngal
lmyangert
hrustbyt
hrustunt
il
webot
hex
plode.Icol
l
apseont
opofher
br
eat
hingheav
il
y.ThemomentIr
egai
n
mybr
eat
h,r
eal
i
tyhi
tmehar
d.Igetup
andf
ixmy
sel
fbef
orewal
ki
ngout
wi
thoutawor
d.Igeti
nmycarand
puncht
hest
eer
ingwheel
sev
eral
times!
Ihav
enev
ercheat
edonmywi
fenot
ev
enonce.Ihat
echeat
erswi
thal
lmy
hear
twhathav
eIdone!
!Ohshi
t!

Il
ookatt
hel
i
stbef
oreme5t
hmi
ssi
on
accompl
i
shed5mor
etogo!Ismi
l
eand
si
ponmywi
ne.I
t’
sgameonbi
tch!

HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayTshi
diKesi
&
HappyBi
rt
hdayDuduet
sangTl
hompo
CHAPTER21

I
t’
sSundayt
odaywear
egoi
ngback
homebutIaskedt
hemot
her
stoal
l
ow
met
ospendhal
foft
hedaywi
thmybest
f
ri
end,
Guguandt
heyagr
eed.Yhoomy
v
agi
nai
sbur
ningespeci
all
ywhenIpee.
I
’
m nev
erdoi
ngt
hisagai
nit
’spai
nful
.I
j
ustf
ini
shedshower
ing,
mymom i
s
l
ooki
ngf
orsomet
hingf
ormet
owear
.

“
Whatdoy
ouwantt
owear
”Sheasks
“
Apai
rofbl
ackj
ean,
asweat
erand
t
imber
landsboot
s”
“
Okay
…whendi
dyoucomebackt
obed
l
astni
ghtIwassot
ir
edIdi
dn’
tev
en
heary
ou”
“
Around10pm”Il
i
eofcour
seIcame
backi
ntheweehour
soft
hemor
ning.
Shei
ndi
rect
lygav
emet
hegoaheadt
o
hav
esexbutt
hatdoesn’
tmeanIhav
eto
di
srespecther
.Weshoul
dn’
thav
edone
i
tint
hef
ir
stpl
acewhi
l
etheyar
eher
e
wi
thus.Idon’
tknowwhatwewer
e
t
hinki
ngIguesswecoul
dn’
twai
ttohav
e
eachot
heri
t’
sapi
tyf
ormei
twasso
pai
nful
.Ihopehi
smom di
dn’
thearus
Lwenkosi
wast
heonewhosai
dIwas
maki
ngnoi
sebuthet
urnedoutt
obet
he
onewhowasgr
oani
ngl
i
keawounded
ani
mal
whi
l
eIwasweepi
ngsi
l
ent
ly.
“
YesI
’
m okaywhy
?”
“
Youl
ookl
i
key
ouar
einpai
n”Hel
lIam,
y
ounev
ert
oldmei
t’
sthi
spai
nful
to
hav
esex
!
“
I’
mfi
ne”
“
Okayher
e..
.getdr
essedsot
hatwecan
gohav
ebr
eakf
ast
”Shehandsmemy
cl
othesIgetupsl
owl
yandgetdr
essed.
Icanf
eel
hergaz
eonmesoIt
ryt
oact
nor
mal
event
houghi
t’
sbur
ningdown
t
her
e.
“
I’
m donel
et’
sgo”Shehol
dsmyhandas
wemakeourwayout
“
Youar
ewal
ki
ngf
unnyi
sev
ery
thi
ng
okay
?”
“
Ipumpi
ntosomet
hingl
astni
ghtand
hur
tmyf
oot
”Il
i
eIt
oldy
ouIhav
e
becomeaf
requentl
i
arl
atel
y.
“
OhbabyI
’
m sor
ry”
“
It
’sokaymom”
“
Mor
ningev
ery
one”Mom say
saswe
j
oinot
her
sforbr
eakf
ast
.Theygr
eetus
backshehel
psmesi
tdown.
“
Mor
ningmyDol
l
face”Hewhi
sper
sin
myearhi
svoi
cesendschi
l
lsdownmy
spi
ne
“
Mor
ningcuddl
ecakesar
eyougood?
”I
whi
sperback
“
Mor
etheny
oucoul
dev
eri
magi
newhat
abouty
ou”
“
It
’sst
il
lhur
ts”
“
Itwi
l
lgetbet
terst
handwasami
I’
m
sor
ryy
ezwa”Inod.Weeatbr
eakf
ast
t
oget
herov
erawar
m chat
terandabi
t
ofl
aught
er.I
t’
slookl
i
kemom Zodi
dn’
t
hearusl
astni
ghtt
hat
’sgood.Oncewe
ar
edoneIki
ssmymom goodby
e
“
Mir
acanIgowi
thy
oupl
ease”Snoasks
sosweet
lymaki
ngi
tshar
dformet
o
r
efuse.
“
Okayi
fmom Zoi
sokaywi
tht
hat
”
“
Ayuz
ohl
uphal
oemz
ini
yabant
u”Say
s
Lwenkosi
“
Kahl
eLwandl
eukuphapha.Ofcour
se
y
oucangowi
thherMi
rai
fthat
’snott
oo
muchf
ory
ou”
“
Yaaay
!Thanky
oumommy
”
Ir
emi
ndLwenkosi
tost
artatt
he
phar
macyf
ir
stt
ogetmet
hemor
ning
af
ter
.
“
Whatel
sedoy
ouwant
?”GuguandI
pl
annedt
owat
chNet
fl
ixandcat
chup
soweneedal
oti
cecr
eam andsnacks.
“
Vani
l
lai
cecr
eam,
alotofi
tandsnacks”
“
Munchki
nwhatdoy
ouwant
?”
“
Chocol
ate,
Oreobi
scui
tsand
mar
shmal
l
ows”
“
Ha.
nanosweett
hings”
“
Comeonbut
i”
“
NononoIdon’
twantt
ogeti
ntot
roubl
e
wi
thmom”
“
Shewon’
tknowLwandl
e”
“
Nop!
”
“
Mir
apl
easet
alkt
oyourcuddl
ecakes”
“
Babypl
easej
ustt
hisonce”
“
Youar
egangi
nguponmenow?
”I
chuckl
e
“
Pret
typl
ease”Ipur
semyl
i
ps
“
Okayf
inest
opl
ooki
ngal
lcut
ebutI
f
y
oupr
omi
semesomet
hing”
“
Any
thi
ng”
“
Youwi
l
lletmeeatmybananabasket
”
“
What
’st
hat
?”Iask,
hegi
ggl
esand
whi
sper
sinmyear
“
Yourdel
i
ciouspussy
”
“
Uyany
aIt
oldy
ouI
’
m notdoi
ngt
hat
ev
eragai
n”Hel
aughs
“
Ahwel
lnami
I’
m notbuy
ingmunchki
n
any
thi
ng”
“
Youar
esounf
airLwenkosi
thatshi
t
hur
ts.
”
“
It
’susual
l
yli
ket
hatwheni
t’
syourf
ir
st
t
imebaby
”
“
Let
’sst
ickt
othet
oungepl
easei
nyoka
ny
okai
yal
umandodahai
ngeke”He
bur
sti
ntol
aught
er.
“
Youar
esocut
eyaz
”Heki
ssesmy
cheek
“
Pleasej
ustbuyherwhatshewant
sI’
m
beggi
ngy
ou”
“
OkayIwi
l
l.Il
ovey
ouy
ezwa”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”
“
Youal
sol
ovemebut
yri
ght
?”Igi
ggl
e
“
Ofcour
seIl
ovey
oumunchki
n”
Lwenkosi
say
stohi
ssi
ster
“
Ilov
eyoumor
ecuddl
ecakeska
dol
l
face”Thi
schi
l
dissosweety
az.
“
Ohmunchki
nyouar
emaki
ngmebl
ush
now…Iwi
l
lber
ightbacknowbehav
e
y
our
sel
ves”
“
Weal
way
sbehav
eouknowt
hat
.
Pl
easegetmeamel
rosecheese
spr
ead”
“
Okay
”Iheart
hedooropeni
ngand
cl
osi
ng.
“
Mir
a”
“
Yesbabygi
rl
?”
“
Ili
edt
oyouonFr
idayt
hatIhadagood
day
.Ihadabaddayact
ual
l
y”myhear
t
si
nks
“
Ohbabywhy
?”
“
Mybestf
ri
endLi
rai
sangr
yatme
becauseIat
emyl
unchwi
thJadennot
wi
thher
”
“
Who’
sJaden?
”
“
It
’sanewboy
,hej
ustst
art
edschool
l
astweek.Heaskedmet
obehi
sfr
iend
andIagr
eedbutLi
radoesn’
twantmet
o
behi
sfr
iend.Il
i
kehi
m he’
sagoodboy
butev
ery
onei
nthecl
assdon’
tli
kehi
m.”
Thi
sisoneoft
het
hingsIl
i
keaboutt
his
chi
l
d.She’
scar
ingandf
ri
endl
yyetshe’
s
soy
oung.
“
OhbabyI
’
m sor
ryt
oheart
hat
.You
shoul
dtal
ktoLi
raIdon’
tthi
nki
t’
sa
pr
obl
em i
fyouguy
scanbeal
lfr
iends
whatdoy
out
hink?
”
“
Can’
tIbet
hei
rfr
iendbuthewi
l
lbemy
f
ri
endonl
y?”Il
augh
“
Whydoy
ouwanthi
mtobey
ourf
ri
end
onl
y?”
“
Mosdaddyi
smymommy
’sf
ri
endonl
y.
Lwandl
eisy
ourf
ri
endonl
y”Ichuckl
eas
I
’
m aboutt
orepl
yLwenkosi
geti
nthe
car
“
Wher
e’smychocol
ateLwandl
e”
“
Her
e”
“
Thanky
oubut
i”
“
Her
ear
ethepi
l
lsandbot
tl
edwat
er”
“
Thanky
ou”Idownt
hepi
l
lswi
thwat
er
“
Arey
ousi
ckMi
ra”
“
YesIhav
eheadache”
“
OhI
’
m sor
ry”
“
Thanky
oubaby
…canIhav
ethe
mel
rosespr
ead”
“
Sur
e..
.her
e”It
akei
tandopent
hel
i
d
bef
oredi
ggi
ngmyf
oref
ingert
henshov
e
i
tmymout
h.
“
Babywhyy
oudi
dn’
ttel
lmet
obuya
br
eadorsomet
hing”
“
Idon’
twantabr
eadIl
i
ket
oeati
tli
ke
t
his.
”
“
Ohokay
”Hesoundssur
pri
seahwel
lI
cont
inueeat
ingmymel
rosespr
ead.
“
Wher
e’sy
ourphonebabyIneedt
he
Gugu’
sdi
rect
ions”
“
Ohy
es”It
akei
noutf
rom myj
ean
pocketandgi
vei
ttohi
m.Oncewear
ri
ve
hebabyki
ssmeandl
eav
e.Gugu
squeez
esmei
nherar
ms
“
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ng”
“
Ibr
oughtt
heseIhopei
t’
senough”
“
Youshoul
dn’
thav
ebabesbutt
hank
y
ou”Shet
akest
hepl
ast
icf
rom myhand.
“
Wher
e’sy
ourpar
ent
s”
“
Theywentt
ochur
ch”Thewor
d
“
chur
ch”makesmesl
eepy
.Ev
ery
Sundaywehav
ebeengoi
ngt
oMom
Zo’
schur
ch.Akubhor
iyeses!I
mfor
ever
sl
eepywhenI
’
m att
hechur
chandt
hat
makesmymom angr
y.Shesay
s
embar
rassi
ngher
,tr
ustt
hatwomant
o
makeev
ery
thi
ngabouther
.
“
Makey
our
sel
fcomf
ort
abl
e”She
ex
plai
nst
hesetupofherl
oungeandI
f
indmy
sel
finoneoft
hecoucheswhi
l
e
shet
akesSnot
othepl
ayr
oom t
omeet
herl
i
ttl
esi
ster
s.Secondl
ateshecomes
backandsi
tsnex
ttome.Wei
ndul
geon
i
cecr
eam whi
l
ecat
chi
ngup
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
ishotbabesdamn!
Youar
eguy
smakeagr
eatcoupl
e”I
smi
l
e
“
He’
sdr
ivi
ngmecr
azyG.
u.Thet
hings
hedoest
omey
err
!Yazwenay
ouar
ea
badf
ri
endkoda”
“
Whathav
eIdone?
”
“
Younev
ershar
edev
ery
thi
ngwi
thme
aboutsexy
ouhav
enoi
deahowmuchI
hav
eembar
rassedmy
sel
f”Igoonand
t
ell
heraboutt
hedayIt
houghtIpeed
my
sel
fandl
ostmyv
irgi
nit
yand
Lwenkosi
laughedatme.
“
Youar
ejoki
ngr
ight
?”Sheshr
iekswi
th
l
aught
er
“
Youar
eal
sol
aughi
ngatmemx
m”
“
Aski
esbabesInev
ert
houghty
ouar
e
t
hiscl
uel
ess”Shesay
slaughi
ng
“
Fuseg!
”
“
I’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
twantt
ocor
rupty
ou.I
l
ovedt
hesweeti
nnocenty
ou”
“
Hai
sukaandy
out
oldmet
hedayy
ou
l
osty
ourv
irgi
nit
yitwasni
ce.Youl
i
edt
o
me!
”
“
OMGy
oudi
dthedeed?
”Sheasks
ent
husi
ast
ical
l
y
“
Yesl
astni
ghty
ooohIt
houghtIwas
dy
ingG.
u”Shegi
ggl
es
“
Youar
eex
agger
ati
ng”
“
I’
mtel
l
ingy
ouIcan’
tev
enwal
kri
ght
now.
”
“
OhbabesI
’
m sor
ryt
omei
twasgood.
Thef
ir
stt
imedi
ff
erst
oev
ery
one.I
tmay
hur
t,orf
eel
good,
orbot
h.Ther
emi
ght
bepai
nandbl
eedi
ngt
hef
ir
stt
imea
peni
sorf
inger
sgoi
ntoy
ourv
agi
na,
but
i
tdoesn’
thappent
oev
ery
body
.Some
peopl
enat
ural
l
yhav
emor
ehy
menal
t
issuet
hanot
her
s,t
hispai
nand
bl
eedi
ngcanhappenwhent
hei
rhy
men
get
sst
ret
ched.
”
“
Yhoohay
iI’
m nev
erdoi
ngi
tagai
nI
pr
eferor
al”Shegi
ggl
es
“
It
’sgetbet
terwi
tht
imesweet
yyou
woul
dseewheny
oudoi
tagai
nitwoul
d
bel
esspai
nful
unt
ili
tfeel
sgoodl
i
ke
or
alsexorev
enmor
e”
“
Real
l
y?”
“
I’
mtel
l
ingy
ou,
youwoul
dbet
heone
beggi
ngf
ori
t”Wegi
ggl
e
“
Sohowi
sJj
ozi
bur
gtr
eat
ingy
ou?
”
“
Ahwel
lnotbadheeechomeeI
’
min
t
roubl
e!”Ohl
ordIdon’
twantt
oheart
his
“
Imett
hisguyneh,
he’
sact
ual
l
y
Londi
siz
we’
stwi
nbr
other
”
“
Thehost
?”
“
Yes”Okay
“
Kant
ihowol
dishe?
”
“
Tur
ning21ont
he31stOfAugust
”
“
Haay
ouev
enknowhi
sbi
rt
hday
”She
gi
ggl
es
“
Yaphel
awehav
ebeenspendi
ngsome
t
imet
oget
herandwegot
othesame
uni
ver
sit
y.He’
sver
ychar
mingand
humbl
eunl
i
kehi
stwi
nbr
other
.Thatone
i
sful
lofhi
msel
f.Hehast
hatt
hing
y
okut
hi“
I’
m hotandI
’
m aSi
thol
e”Ar
gh
Hei
sannoy
ingact
ual
l
y.
“
Whati
shi
sname?
”
“
Mel
i
siz
we.
..
sot
het
hingi
shehasa4
y
earol
ddaught
erandhe’
sst
il
ldat
ing
wi
tht
hebabymamabutIl
i
kehi
myou
know”
“
HaaaGugudontt
ell
mey
ouwantt
o
causet
roubl
ebet
weent
het
wooft
hem.
”
“
Theyar
enotmar
ri
edmos!Achi
l
disnot
amar
ri
edcer
ti
fi
cat
echoma”
“
Sti
l
lIdon’
tthi
nki
t’
sagoodi
dea.Whyi
s
heev
enaski
ngy
ououtwhenhehasa
gi
rl
fr
iendmor
eov
ert
hemot
herofhi
s
daught
ermx
m!”
“
It
’sdoesn’
tendt
her
esweet
y,Imett
his
ot
hert
all
yummyboywi
thbr
oad
shoul
der
sandsex
ysl
eepyey
esohl
ord
abany
eomamabay
azal
ayaz
.Hehas
bowl
egsandwhenhewal
ksJesus!You
seet
hatoney
ouj
ustgetwetbyl
ooki
ng
athi
m.”Il
aughi
habaumngani
wami
baki
thi
“
Wet
alkedandex
changednumber
s.He
t
oldmehe’
sar
oundt
ovi
sithi
s
gr
andmot
herheact
ual
l
yli
vei
nLondon.
Thatwasabummerany
wayhet
ookme
outf
orl
unchwegott
oknoweachot
her
,
y
ouwon’
tbel
i
evehowol
dishe?
”
“
Howol
dishe?
”
“
15y
ear
s!”Il
augh
“
Buthe’
snott
hatbadchomeehe’
sonl
y
4y
ear
syoungert
hany
ou”
“
Andy
ouwoul
dn’
ttel
lthathe’
s15y
ear
s
Idon’
tknowwhatdoest
heseki
dseat
maanandhi
ssexgamei
ssomat
ured”
Woahsexgame?
“
Yousl
epwi
thhi
m!”
“
Cal
li
tamomentofweaknessmy
f
ri
end”Igasp
“
Don’
tbej
udgment
alpl
ease”
“
I’
m notI
’
mjustshocked”
“
Youwi
l
lbemor
eshockedwheny
ou
heart
hel
astpar
toft
hest
ory
.SoNsi
ka
wentbackt
oLondonbutwehav
ebeen
cont
act
ingeachot
herev
ery
day
,It
hink
wear
edat
ingI
’
m notsur
eont
heot
her
si
deMel
i
siz
weandIspendsmor
eti
me
t
oget
herandIt
hinkI
’
mfal
l
ingf
orhi
m.
I
heeemyf
ri
endi
ttur
nedoutt
hatNsi
ka
andMel
i
siz
wear
emor
eli
kebr
other
s.
Thei
rmomsar
etwi
nsi
ster
s”I
m st
unned
t
ospeak!
“
YhoooGuguwhatar
eyougoi
ngt
odo”
“
Idon’
tknowmyf
ri
endI
’
m scr
ewed!I
hav
ebeeni
gnor
ingt
hei
rcal
l
s”
“
Youar
eindeepshi
t!
”
“
Tel
lmeabouti
t!
”Wet
alkmor
eabout
ev
ery
thi
ngandany
thi
ng.I
’
m gl
admy
f
ri
endi
sadj
ust
ingv
erywel
li
nthi
ssi
de
y
ikhonj
eukut
hishe’
scaughtup
bet
weent
wobr
other
s.If
eel
sor
ryf
orher
butIf
eel
mor
esor
ryf
ort
hebr
other
s.
Af
tert
hegr
eatt
imewi
thmyf
ri
end
Lwenkosi
fet
chesus.

Icoul
dn’
tsl
eepl
astni
ghtt
hinki
ngabout
whathappenedbet
weenKhany
iand
my
sel
f.Howcoul
dIhav
ebeensost
upi
d.
Somuchf
orhat
ingcheat
ers.Ihav
e
nev
erbeenacheat
er,
Idon’
tknowwhat
gott
ome.Bongai
stheoneIhav
eey
es
f
or,
theonl
ywomant
hatIl
ovef
rom t
he
dept
hofmyhear
t.Ikeepscr
ewi
ngev
ery
chancet
hatIget
.HowIcanl
ookather
i
ntheey
esaf
terwhatIhav
edone.Ihav
e
al
readyputhert
hroughsomuch,
she
doesn’
tdeser
vet
his.I
nfactshedoesn’
t
needt
oknow,
thi
swi
l
lhur
thermor
e
t
hanshe’
sal
readyhur
t.Idon’
tknow
howKhany
iandIar
egoi
ngt
ogoon
af
tert
his.I
’
m bewi
l
der
edatt
he
r
esponseIgotf
rom her
.Shedi
dn’
tev
en
t
ryt
ost
opme,
whatdoest
hatmean?I
s
shef
all
i
ngme?I
ssheev
ensupposedt
o
besl
eepi
ngwi
thherpat
ient
?
I
’
m pr
epar
ingdi
nnerf
ormyt
wof
avor
it
es
l
adi
es.Theyar
eont
hei
rwaynow.I
t'
s
ar
ound6pm att
hemoment
,I’
m sur
e
t
heywi
l
lbeher
eat7pm.I
'
m notmaki
ng
any
thi
ngf
ancy
,justadumpl
i
ngandt
ri
pe
wi
thmashpot
atoesandcr
eamyspi
nach.
I
t’
smywi
fe’
sfav
ori
tes.Peanutbut
ter
cheesecakef
ordesser
twhi
chmy
daught
er’
sfav
ori
te.OnceI
’
m donewi
th
ev
ery
thi
ngIgoupst
air
stot
akeaqui
ck
shower
.If
ini
shshower
ingandwear
sweat
pant
s,v
estandpushi
ns.Ishuf
fl
e
t
otheki
tchent
osett
het
abl
eand
ev
ery
thi
ngbyt
het
imeIf
ini
sht
heyar
ri
ve.

“
Beaut
if
ull
adi
es”
“
Hel
l
oDaddy
”
“
Khumal
o”Theybot
hsayatoncemy
hear
tjustmel
t.IscoopMi
raupand
pl
antki
ssesal
lov
erherf
acewhi
ch
causeshert
ogi
ggl
e
“
Congr
atul
ati
onsmypr
incess,
youmade
daddypr
oud”
“
Thanky
ouDaddy
”Iputherdownand
wal
ktomywi
fe
“
Sweetdar
li
ng”It
ugherweav
ebehi
nd
herearandt
akeherl
i
psi
ntomi
ne,
she
moanssof
tl
y.
“
Imi
ssedy
ou”
“
Imi
ssedy
out
oo.
..
it
’ssmel
l
slov
elyi
n
her
e,whatdi
dyoucook”
“
Yourf
avor
it
e”
“
Mmht
hanky
oubaby
,it
'sl
i
key
ouknew
howmuchImi
ssedt
hese”
“
Letmet
aket
hesebags,
Iwi
l
ldi
shup
f
orus”
It
aket
hebagst
oourbedr
oom and
comebackt
owar
m upt
het
ri
pet
hen
j
oinmywi
feanddaught
erwhoar
e
al
readygat
her
edbyt
het
abl
eint
he
di
ningar
ea.Idi
shupf
oral
lofusand
ser
vet
hem.
“
Mir
a,bl
essourf
ood”Bongasay
smuch
t
oMi
ra'
sannoy
ancebutshedoesasher
mot
hersay
s.Weeatov
era
conv
ersat
ionandl
aught
er.Ihav
ebeena
monst
ert
otakeawaymomentl
i
ket
his.I
can’
trememberwhenwast
hel
astt
hey
wer
ethi
shappyev
enMi
ra.Shel
ooks
happyandshe’
sgl
owi
ng.If
indmy
sel
f
say
ingal
i
ttl
epr
ayert
omy
sel
fbeggi
ng
t
hemanabov
etogi
vemest
rengt
hto
f
ightmydemonsandbeagood
husbandaswel
lasagoodf
ather
.Once
wef
ini
sh,
mywi
fecol
l
ect
sthedi
shes
andwashest
hem wi
thMi
ra.Ideci
det
o
r
unabubbl
ebat
hwi
thcandl
eli
ghtand
sof
tmusi
cint
hebackgr
ound.Thedoor
swi
ngsopenandshewal
ksi
n,shel
ooks
t
ir
edi
tmustbet
hel
ongdr
ivesher
eal
l
y
needst
hisbat
h.
"
Youl
ookt
ir
ed,
Ihav
epr
epar
edabat
h
f
orus"Iundr
essandscoopherup
bef
orewal
ki
ngt
othebat
hroom.Ipl
ace
heront
hebat
htub
“
Wowt
hisi
sbeaut
if
ul”
“
Not
hingcompar
est
oyour
sel
f”I
undr
essandgetbehi
ndher
“
Whathav
eIdonet
odeser
vet
his?
”She
asks
“
Youhav
ebeennot
hingbutanamaz
ing
wi
feBongaandf
ort
hatIwi
l
lfor
ever
l
ovey
ou.Iwantt
oapol
ogi
sef
ort
hepai
n
Iputy
out
hrough.Youdeser
vebet
terI
'
m
goi
ngt
omakei
tmyev
ery
daydut
ythatI
gi
vey
oubet
tert
hany
oudeser
ve.Iwant
t
obeabet
termanf
ory
oubaby
.Thank
y
ousomuchf
ornev
ergi
vi
nguponme
ev
enwhenIdi
dn'
tdeser
vet
hat
.Thank
y
ouf
ory
ourl
ove,
honest
y,l
oyal
ty,
car
e
andy
ourwar
mth.I
'
m notgoi
ngt
omake
pr
omi
sesnomor
ebutIwanty
out
osee
bymyact
ionst
hatIwantt
ochange.I
wantt
obeabet
terman,
amany
ou
woul
dbepr
oudt
ocal
lyourhusband.A
many
ouwoul
dbepr
oudt
ocal
laf
ather
ofy
ourdaught
er.Il
ovey
ousomuch
MaKhumal
o”she'
scr
yingandt
hat
br
eaksmyhear
t.Ir
eal
l
ybr
oket
his
womanbey
ondi
magi
nat
ion.
“
Youhav
ebeenagoodhusband
Khumal
o,Iknowt
haty
ourpasti
s..
..
”I
cuthershor
t
“
Stopmaki
ngex
cusesf
ormest
handwa
sami
.Not
hingj
ust
if
yswhatIdi
dtoy
ou.I
wassupposet
opr
otecty
ounoti
nfl
i
ct
pai
nony
ou.I
'
m sor
ryBonga”It
urnher
ar
oundandwi
pehert
ear
s
“
I’
m sor
ryf
rom t
hedeepestofmyhear
t.
Idon’
tdeser
vey
ourf
orgi
veness,
Iknow
butIwoul
dfi
ghthar
dfori
t.Idon’
twant
y
out
ofor
giv
emebecausey
ouf
eel
sor
ry
f
ormeory
ouar
escar
edofmebut
becauseIdeser
vei
t.Iwantt
oear
nyou
f
orgi
venessbaby
”Ipl
antki
ssesal
lov
er
herf
acet
henki
ssherl
i
ps,
theki
ss
deepensIr
unmyhandsf
rom herback
downt
oherbut
tandsqueez
esi
tinmy
pal
mscausi
nghert
omoansof
tl
y.Ican
f
eel
mydi
ckgr
owi
nghar
dinani
nst
ant
“
Let
’st
aket
hist
oourbedr
oom”She
mumbl
esagai
nstmyl
i
psandIobl
i
ge.I
makesweetl
ovet
oherunt
ilshepasses
out
.If
eel
finger
sti
psst
rengt
heni
ngmy
bushyey
ebr
owsandsmi
l
ethr
oughmy
sl
eepyf
ace.Shel
ovesdoi
ngt
hatand
somehowIf
indi
tsoot
hing.Ibl
i
nkmy
ey
esopenandl
ookatmybeaut
if
ulwi
fe
nex
ttome.
“
Mor
ningMnt
ungwa”
“
Mor
ningMaKhumal
o”Isaywi
tha
gr
oggyv
oice
“
Howdi
dyousl
eep?
”
“
Likeababyandy
ou?
”
“
Isl
eptwel
l
,ar
eyougoi
ngt
ohav
ea
bat
hfi
rstorwi
l
lyoueatf
ir
st”
“
Iwi
l
leatf
ir
sti
fyouar
ethebr
eakf
ast
”
Shebi
tesherl
owerl
i
pseduct
ivel
y
“
Soundst
empt
ingbuty
ougoi
ngt
obe
l
atef
orwor
k”
“
I’
m notgoi
ngt
owor
ktoday
,I’
mjust
goi
ngt
ospendmydaywi
thmyt
wo
f
avor
it
eladi
es”
“
Ohwel
li
fthat
’st
hecase.
..
eatmedaddy
I
’
m al
lyour
s”Herv
oicei
slacedwi
th
seduct
ion,
maki
ngmehar
dinani
nst
ant
,
wi
thoutawast
eoft
ime,
Idev
ourher
.

Gui
l
tiseat
ingmeupbyeachpassi
ng
dayandI
’
m cont
empl
ati
ngt
ocome
cl
eant
omywi
febutev
eryt
imeIl
ookat
howhappyshei
smyhear
tdr
opst
omy
st
omach.Ican’
tbr
ingmy
sel
ftot
ell
her
t
het
rut
hitwi
l
lbr
eakher
.Ihat
ethef
act
t
hatIhav
ebeenl
yi
ngaboutgoi
ngt
o
t
her
apysessi
onswhi
l
eIhav
en’
tbeen
t
her
efort
hewhol
eweek.Ican’
tface
Khany
i,I
’
m soashamedandIdon’
tthi
nk
t
hesesessi
onswi
l
lwor
kaf
terwhatwe
hav
edone.Wecr
ossedt
hel
i
neandi
t’
s
won’
tbeeasyt
ocar
ryonasi
fnot
hing
happened.I
’
minmyof
fi
ceandt
hedoor
bur
stopen.Khany
iandmyr
ecept
ioni
st,
Xol
elwawal
ksi
n
“
Itr
iedt
ost
ophersi
rbutsher
efused”
“
It
’sokay
,Iwi
l
ltakei
tfr
om her
e
Xol
elwa”shenodsr
eluct
ant
lyandshake
hersmal
lassout
.Ist
andupasKhany
i
wal
kst
ome,
west
areeachot
herdeep
i
ntheey
esf
oramoment
.Icanf
eel
her
war
m br
eat
honmyf
ace,
she’
sal
most
ast
all
asIam.
“
Khumal
o”
“
MissGamawhatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e”
“
Youhav
en'
tcomet
ooursessi
onsf
or
t
hewhol
eweek.Iwasv
erywor
ri
ed
abouty
ou”Ist
udyherf
acebutI
’
m
unabl
etodeci
pherherf
aci
alex
pressi
on.
“
Ist
hishowy
ouwor
k?Checkev
ery
pat
ientofy
our
sift
heydon’
tpi
tch”
“
YesIcheckupont
hem t
hrought
he
phone,
onl
ythosespeci
alonesgett
obe
checkedi
nper
son”Shegi
vesmea
smi
l
e
“
Ahwel
lI’
mfi
neandIhav
edeci
dedt
hat
wast
heendofoursessi
ons”She
f
urr
owsherey
ebr
ows
“
Whatdoest
hatmean?
”
“
Iwi
l
lfi
ndanewpsy
chol
ogi
st,
Ino
l
ongerf
eel
comf
ort
abl
etocar
ryonwi
th
y
ou”
“
Why
?”I
ssher
eal
l
ygoi
ngt
oactl
i
ke
not
hinghappened.
“
YouknowwhyKhany
i,wecr
ossedt
he
l
i
neonSat
urday
.Itshoul
dn’
thav
e
happened”Shel
aughs
“
Ohy
out
alki
ngaboutt
hat
,ahcomeon
y
ouwer
eemot
ional
andasy
our
psy
chol
ogi
stIhel
pedy
out
orel
i
eve
st
resst
her
e’snot
hingwr
ongwi
tht
hat
Khumal
o”Ichuckl
eandshakemyhead
i
ndi
sbel
i
ef
“
Ify
ouwor
ri
edabouty
ourwi
fef
indi
ng
outdon’
twor
ryIswor
etoconf
ident
ial
i
ty.
I
t’
sni
cet
oseey
ouar
eokay
.Pl
easedo
comeback,
west
il
lhav
eal
ongwayt
o
go.Hav
eagr
eatday
”Shet
urnsar
ound
andshakeherbi
gasst
othedoor
.
Ther
e’ssomet
hingabouthert
hatIf
ind
har
dtor
esi
st.It
akel
ongst
ri
desbehi
nd
herpul
lherr
oughl
yshef
all
righti
ntomy
ar
ms.Ismashmyl
i
psi
ntoher
sandwe
dev
oureachot
her
’sl
i
psl
i
kewehav
en’
t
beeneat
ingf
ormont
hs,
shewr
apsher
ar
msar
oundmynecki
ntensi
fyi
ngt
he
ki
ss.If
eel
mydi
ckgr
owi
nghar
dinmy
pant
s.Ipi
ckherupal
l
owi
nghert
o
cl
ampsherl
egsar
oundmywai
stt
hen
pr
essheragai
nstt
hewal
lwi
thout
br
eaki
ngt
heki
ss.Myhandf
indi
t’
sway
bet
weenherl
egsf
uckshe’
snotwear
ing
anypai
nti
es,
shecamepr
epar
edIsee.I
si
dlemyf
inger
sdeepi
nherwetcunt
shegaspf
orai
r
“
Youar
ewetf
ormehuh”
“
Ohy
essDaddyKhumz
”Iwor
kmy
f
inger
sonherwetspi
tpushi
ngt
hem
deeper
.
“
YouwantDaddyKhumzt
ofucky
ou
huh”
“
Yessssohshi
t”
“
Tel
lmewhatdoy
ouwantwhor
e!”I
spankhert
highandshewhi
mper
s
“
FuckmeDadddyKhumz
!”
“
Ican’
theary
oubi
tch!
”Ispankhert
high
onceagai
nshescr
eamsl
oudl
y
“
Fuckmesensel
essDaddyKhumz
,I
wanty
ourbi
gcocki
nsi
deofme”It
ake
outmyhar
drockdi
ckandsl
i
dedeep
i
nsi
deofherf
il
li
ngal
lherwi
thj
ustone
t
hrustandshey
elps
“
Ahhhohhshi
i
t!”Igr
oanl
oudl
yast
he
war
mthofhersexenv
elopesmeand
buckmyhi
ps.Ourmoansofpl
easur
e
f
il
lsmyof
fi
ce.If
eel
hernai
l
sdi
ggi
ngon
myshoul
der
sasIpumpi
ntoherhar
der
andf
ast
er,
thankGodI
’
m wear
ingashi
rt
,
shehasv
eryshar
pnai
l
s.If
eel
mycock
spamsasherwal
l
scl
enchesar
oundmy
di
ckshescr
eamsl
ouderandr
eaches
hercl
i
maxt
aki
ngmewi
thher
.

“
Don’
tcr
y,I
’
m comi
ngy
ezwa”Isayov
er
t
hephonet
omyDol
l
face.She’
sver
y
cl
i
ngyt
heseday
sbutIl
ovei
tthough.I
j
ustgotbackf
rom school
Ineedt
otake
ashowerf
ir
stt
owashawaysweat
.It
’s
wasav
eryhotdayt
oday
.I’
m wel
comed
byasmal
lassi
napai
rofl
eggi
ngsand
l
ooki
ngati
tri
ghtnowI
'
mremi
ndedof
myuncl
e.“
Thatgi
rli
snotpet
it
eshe’
s
t
hinushongez
inqaez
incanengat
hi
i
nsanguy
eshumi
”(Shehassmal
lbut
t
l
i
keR1packofweed)If
indmy
sel
f
l
aughi
ngwhi
chst
art
lesher
“
Lwandl
e”
“
HeyNandi
”Yesshe’
sst
il
ll
iv
ingwi
thus
i
t’
sbeenaweeksi
ncet
hebur
ial
ofher
gr
andmot
her
.Innocenthasn’
tbeen
f
ound.It
rustmyuncl
ewi
tht
heset
hings
buti
fheal
socan’
tfi
ndhi
m ayIdon’
t
know.I
nnocentcan’
tjustdi
sappearl
i
ke
t
his,
somet
hingi
snotr
ight
.Il
ookather
,
t
her
e’ssomet
hingdi
ff
erentt
odaywi
th
her
.
“
Yourhoodi
elooksf
ami
l
iar
”Shel
ooks
atmesheepi
shl
yandIl
osti
t
“
Who’
shoodi
eist
hatNandi
!”
“
Ifoundi
tiny
ourbedr
oom andIl
i
ke…”I
cuthershor
t
“
Whot
hef
uckgav
eyouaper
missi
ont
o
got
omybedr
oom huh?l
etal
onet
ake
mydol
l
face’
shoodi
eandweari
t!
!”
“
I’
m sor
ryLwandl
eI…”
“
Takei
tof
fnow!
!”
“
Heyheywhat
’sgoi
ngonher
e!”Asks
gr
andmaasshewal
ksi
n.Nandi
bur
st
i
ntot
ear
s
“
What
’swr
ongsi
s,Lwandl
ewhathav
e
y
oudonet
oherhuh!
!”
“
She’
stheonewhowentt
omyr
oom
wi
thoutmyper
missi
ongogoandt
ook
Mi
ra’
shoodi
e!”
“
Hai
sukawhat
’swr
ongwi
tht
hat
!”
“
She’
sinv
adi
ngmypr
ivacyGogo!
!”
“
Thi
sisnoty
ourhousebutmyson’
s
house,
ify
ouwantpr
ivacygobui
l
dyour
ownhouser
hhaaa.Comesi
s”
“
Bef
orey
ougowi
thher
,shehast
otake
of
fthathoodi
egogo!
”Shei
gnor
esme
andwal
kawaywi
thNandi
.Thi
sol
d
womanwi
l
lbet
hedeat
hofme!Idon’
t
l
i
kei
twhenpeopl
einv
ademypr
ivacy
wor
sesheev
ent
ookmydol
l
face’
s
hoodi
eandwor
nit
.WTF!Il
i
ket
hat
hoodi
e,shel
efti
ther
edur
ingt
heweek
whenshewasher
etoseeme.No,
it’
s
mor
eli
keI
’
mtheonewhomadeher
f
orgeti
tbecauseIwant
edt
okeepi
tfor
my
sel
f.WhenI
’
m mi
ssi
ngherIweari
t
andf
eel
closert
oher
.Iknowi
t’
susual
l
y
t
hegi
rl
swhol
i
ket
oweart
hei
r
boy
fri
endscl
othes,
IguessI
’
mjust
uni
que.Iwal
ktomybedr
oom f
umi
ng
wi
thanger
,It
hrowmybagont
opoft
he
bedandst
ri
pnakedbef
oregoi
ngt
othe
bat
hroom.It
akeaqui
ckshowerwhen
I
’
mfi
nishedIgetdr
essedi
naNi
keshor
t
andt
-shi
rtwi
thf
lops.It
akemycarkey
s
andheadout
,bumpi
ngi
ntoSnoont
he
door
“
Grandmai
scal
l
ingy
ouLwandl
e”
“
Now?
”
“
Yes”If
oll
owhert
othel
oungeandIf
ind
mypar
ent
s,gogoandNandi
wai
ti
ngf
or
mesoIsi
tdown
“
Youcal
l
edme”
“
Nandi
say
syouar
emi
str
eat
ingher
Lwandl
e”dadsay
s
“
That
’snott
ruedad,
she’
stheonewho
wentt
omyr
oom wi
thoutmyknowl
edge
andt
ookMi
ra’
shoodi
e,t
hev
erysame
hoodi
eshe’
swear
ing”
“
Shesai
dsheapol
ogi
zednj
ebuty
ou
keptshout
ingather
”Gogosay
s,Ir
oll
myey
es
“
Younotgoi
ngt
orol
lyourey
esatus
boy
!Thi
sist
hemot
herofy
ourchi
l
dyou
hav
etot
akecar
eofherandmakesur
e
shedoesn’
tst
ress!
”
“
She’
swel
ltakencar
eof
f,whatmor
e
shoul
dIdonowngi
mgqogqoshe?
”
“
Sheneedsy
oursuppor
tdammi
t,she
needst
oknowt
hatshe’
snotal
one.
Wenay
ouar
efor
everwi
thMi
ra.You
needt
opr
ior
it
izeboy
!Nandi
ist
heone
car
ryi
ngy
ourchi
l
dnotMi
ra.Whatki
nd
ofaf
atherchoosesagi
rl
fr
iendov
erhi
s
chi
l
d!!
”
“
Say
sthesamemanwhochoseal
cohol
andhoesov
erhi
schi
l
drenandhi
swi
fe!
May
bengi
fuz
ewena,
don’
tyout
hink?
”
Mom gaspsandherey
esgl
i
stenwi
th
t
ear
s.Igetupandwal
kout
.Icanhear
t
hem cal
l
ingmebutIi
gnor
ethem.I
’
m
sopi
ssedr
ightnow,
Idon’
tknowwhati
s
ex
pect
edofmenow.WhenIdot
hisI
’
m
wr
ongandwhenIdot
hatI
’
m wr
ong.
Fuckof
fmaan!Ical
lmyDol
l
facet
o
comeoutwhenIar
ri
veatherhouse.
Secondsl
atert
her
eshecomesout
.I
meetherhal
fwayandpul
lhert
omy
ar
ms
“
Arey
ouokay
?”Sheasks
“
Justhol
dmeabi
tlonger
”Shehol
dsme
f
ordearl
i
feandr
ightnowshe’
sal
lI
needt
ocal
m my
sel
fdown.Wepul
l
apar
tandIt
akeherhandt
henl
eadher
t
omycar
.Thedr
ivei
ssi
l
ence
“
Babyy
ouar
eawf
ull
yqui
etwhat
happened”Ther
e’ssomuchconcer
nin
herv
oice.
“
I’
mfi
nest
handwasami
,howar
eyou”
“
I’
mfi
neIj
ustmi
ssedy
ousomuch”
“
Imi
ssy
out
oomyl
ove.
”It
akeherhand
andki
ssi
t.
“
Youknowt
hatIknowy
our
ight
,andI
don’
tli
kei
twheny
oudon’
ttal
ktome”I
si
ghandt
ell
herev
ery
thi
ng.
“
I’
m sor
rymyl
ovet
hismustbehar
dfor
y
oumar
anay
euNandi
waswr
ong”
“
Exact
lybabybutI
’
mthewr
ongone.I
seet
hatNandi
want
smor
ethanwhatI
cangi
veherandnowshe’
susi
ngmy
gr
andmot
herandmyf
ather
”
“
Mxm uy
any
ayazst
handwasami
please
dontal
l
owhert
ogett
oyoupl
ease”
“
Ihav
emyey
esf
ory
ouonl
yDol
l
face.
Youoccupymyhear
tandnooneel
se
y
ezwa?
”Shenodswi
thagr
inonher
f
ace.It
akehert
otheReuni
onbeachi
n
t
hesout
hofDur
banandwer
ideahor
se.
Ther
e’ssomet
hingmagi
cal
and
r
omant
icaboutr
idi
ngi
ntosunsetwi
th
t
heoney
oul
ove.Ienj
oybei
ngherey
es,
pai
nti
ngapi
ctur
eofev
erysi
ngl
ethi
ng,
t
hemoonr
isi
ngont
hebeachast
he
sunsetandt
hemagni
fi
centchangi
ngof
col
orsi
ntheskyast
hesuni
sset
ti
ng
ov
ert
hehor
izon.
“
It
’sbeaut
if
ulbaby
”She’
swhi
sper
sin
awe
“
Likey
oumyl
ove”
“
Thanky
ou”Af
terourhor
ser
ide,
Itake
herbackhomebutshedoesn’
twanna
l
etgosowechi
l
linmycaratt
heback
seatcuddl
i
ng.
“
Thanky
oubaby
”
“
Forwhat
?”Iask
“
Inev
ert
houghtIcoul
dri
deahor
seone
day
.I’
m scar
edofhi
eght
sbuty
ouj
ust
makei
teasyf
ormet
oov
ercomemy
f
ear
sandf
ort
hatIwi
l
lfor
everbe
gr
atef
ul.
”Icupherf
aceandsmashmy
l
i
psonher
sourt
oungesmeeti
na
wel
comi
ngdance,
del
i
ght
ingeachot
her
.
Myr
ingi
ngphonedi
stur
bsus.I
t’
sNandi
Ir
oll
myey
esbef
oreanswer
ingi
t.
“
Yes”
“
HeyIwant
edt
osayI
’
m sor
ry”
“
Coul
dn’
tyouwai
tformet
ocome
home”
“
Idi
dn’
tknowi
fyouwoul
dcomeback”
“
I’
m sor
ryLwandl
elwenkosi
”Iwantt
o
hangupbutIcanheart
hatshewantt
o
saysomet
hing
“
OkayNandi
whatel
sedoy
ouwant
?”
“
I’
m cr
avi
ngf
orhotwi
ngsandcheese
bur
ger
”
“
Youwanthotwi
ngsandcheesebur
ger
onl
y?”
“
Yes”
“
OkayIwi
l
lbuy
..
.”Mi
ra’
shandsdi
stur
bs
measi
tfi
ddl
esonmyf
aceunt
ili
ttakes
myphonef
rom myearandputonher
ear
.
“
Nandi
….don’
twai
tupLwenkosi
isnot
comi
ngback.Vubaamasi
kaSno
st
handwasami
abant
wanabawat
handa
kabi
amasi
.Iwi
l
lrepl
acei
t,noi
nfactI
wi
l
lbuyy
oua4l
i
treofmaast
ofeedt
he
cr
avi
ngsnehshar
p”Shegi
vesmemy
phoneandIbur
sti
ntol
aught
erIcan’
t
bel
i
eveshej
ustdi
dthat
.Youshoul
dsee
howannoy
edshei
sri
ghtandi
t’
sso
f
ucki
ngsex
y.

“
JesusI
’
m comi
ngdon’
tbr
eakmydoor
!”
IshoutasIdr
agmy
sel
ftot
hedoor
.I
‍
opent
hedoorandhemakeshi
swayi
n
wi
thoutmewel
comi
nghi
m.Theset
wo
ment
hinkmyhousei
sthei
rhousenx
!
“
Whatt
hef
uckwast
hat
!”
“
Hel
l
otoy
out
ooSpi
j
oms”
“
Howcoul
dfuckhi
m!Thatwasnotpar
t
oft
hepl
an!
!”
“
Rel
axI
…”
“
Dontt
ell
met
orel
ax,
youcoul
dlose
y
ourj
obf
orsl
eepi
ngwi
thy
ourpat
ient
!
Whatt
hef
ucki
swr
ongwi
thy
ouKhany
i!
”
“
Don’
tshoutatme,
I’
m noty
ourchi
l
d!I
gott
hisIknowwhatI
’
m doi
ng!
”
“
NoIdon’
tthi
nkso,
youar
efal
l
ingf
or
hi
m Khany
isi
l
e!”
“
May
bet
hatwon’
tbeabadt
hing”He
l
aughs
“
Doy
ouheary
our
sel
fri
ghtnow!He’
san
abusi
vebast
ard!Youwanthi
mtobeat
y
ouup!
”
“
He’
snott
hatbady
az,
Icanmakehi
m
t
hemanIwant
”
“
Youar
ecr
azydoy
ouhearme?Youar
e
f
ucki
ngcr
azy
!Iwon’
tlety
ouhav
ethat
abusi
veasshol
e!Youar
elosi
ngy
our
f
ocusnowgety
ouractt
oget
herdoy
ou
hearme!
”Isaynot
hing
“
Doy
ouf
uckenhearmeKhany
isi
l
e!”
“
Yes!
”
“
Good!I
’
mleav
ing”Hewal
ksoutIsi
gh
Spi
j
omsl
i
kest
owor
ryt
oomuch,
Igot
t
his.Al
li
t’
stakesf
oraper
fectr
evenge
ar
ether
ighti
ngr
edi
ent
satt
her
ightt
ime.
CHAPTER22(
unedi
ted)

Ther
e’snot
hinghar
dasl
i
vingwi
th
r
egr
ets,
taunt
ingy
oubi
tbybi
teach
passi
ngday
.I’
m adi
sappoi
ntmentI
know,
whi
l
emyt
winbr
otherwasbusy
t
ryi
ngt
ohust
lef
ormeandmy
gr
andmot
herIhadt
oaddt
hebur
den
andf
all
pregnant
.Hesacr
if
icedhi
sli
fe,
dr
eamsandv
isi
onsf
orusespeci
all
yfor
me.Bef
oreGogogotsi
ckshewasa
mai
d,hersal
arypl
ust
hegr
antuset
o
hel
pusal
otbutaf
tershegotsi
ckl
i
fe
changedi
mmensel
y.I
nnocentdr
opped
outatschool
andst
eppedi
nasour
br
eadwi
nnermucht
ogogo’
s
di
sappr
oval
butt
her
ewasnot
hingshe
coul
ddo.

I
nnocentwasadamantt
otakecar
eof
usandhedi
d,al
thoughhi
soddj
obs
wer
enotpay
ingt
hatmuchbuther
eal
l
y
t
ookcar
eofus.Hei
sthebestbr
otherI
coul
dev
eraskf
or,
itbr
ingsmesomuch
pai
nnowt
hathedi
sappear
edonme.I
t
rul
ywantt
obel
i
evet
hathe’
sst
il
langr
y
atmef
orf
all
i
ngpr
egnanthewi
l
lcal
m
downandcomebackhomeorhe’
s
scar
edhewi
l
lgot
ojai
lbecauseofwhat
hedi
dtoNor
ahhenceher
anawaybut
t
hedr
eamsIhav
eabouthi
mlat
elyar
e
bot
her
some.Imi
sshi
m somuchIwi
pe
myt
ear
swi
tht
hebackofmyhand.

Ther
e’saknockonmydoorIcl
earmy
t
hroatandshout
“
Comei
n”Snowal
ksi
nandl
ooksatme
“
Mommysai
dImustcal
lyoudi
nneri
s
r
eady
”
“
OkayI
’
m comi
ng”
“
Wer
eyoucr
ying?
”Il
ookatherand
shakemyheadno
“
Whyar
eyoust
ayi
ngwi
thus?Don’
tyou
hav
eyourownf
ami
l
y?”Inodsadness
f
lashesacr
ossherey
es.
“
OhI
’
m sor
rydon’
tcr
ymypar
ent
swi
l
l
t
akegoodcar
eofy
ou”Sheof
fer
stohug
meIev
enf
orgott
hatI
’
mli
tt
lemadather
becauseoft
hegoodr
elat
ionshi
pshe
haswi
thNor
ah.IknowIshoul
dn’
tbebut
Ican’
thel
pit,
It’
sseem l
i
keNor
ahhas
ev
ery
onewr
appedar
oundherf
inger
ex
ceptLwandl
e’
sgr
andma.Il
i
keher
wel
lnott
hatbecauseshedoesn’
tli
ke
Nor
ahbutbecauseshe’
sver
ysuppor
ti
ve
t
owar
dsme.Sher
emi
ndsmeofmyl
ate
gr
andmot
her
,she’
stheonl
yonewho
t
rul
ycar
esunl
i
keZol
eka.Nel
l
ywasr
ight
abouther
,whenNor
ahi
sher
eshe’
s
al
way
ssmi
l
ingl
i
kear
etar
dandcal
l
ing
hersweetpetnamesbutnotev
enonce
hassheev
ercal
lmewi
thapetname.
Why
?IsbecauseI
’
m notbl
i
ndl
i
keher
?
Ori
t’
sbecauseI
’
m notr
ichl
i
keher
?For
awomanandadoct
orsheshoul
dknow
t
hatst
ressi
snotgoodf
ormebutshe’
s
al
l
owi
ngNor
aht
ocomeher
eandspend
t
imewi
thLwandl
easi
fI’
m nother
e.I
t’
s
hur
tdeepdowni
nmyhear
t.Asf
or
Lwandl
e’
sfat
her
,hel
i
stenswhathi
s
mom t
ell
shi
m soIwoul
dn’
treal
l
yknow
i
fhe’
ssuppor
ti
vebecauseofwhathi
s
mot
hert
ell
shi
m orhegenui
nel
ycar
es.
SnoandIj
oinev
ery
onef
ordi
nnerbut
Lwandl
elwenkosi
hasn’
tret
urnhome
si
ncehest
ormedoutear
li
er.Iknowhe
i
swi
thMi
ra,
Nor
ahwhat
everhername
i
s.Ev
ent
heboy
sar
eki
ndacompl
aini
ng
t
hathehar
dlyspendt
imewi
tht
hem.
He’
sfor
everwi
thhi
sbl
i
ndgi
rl
.Tr
ustme
Iknowwhatt
heyar
etal
ki
ngabout
.I’
m
l
i
vingwi
thhi
m undert
hesamer
oofbutI
har
dlyseehi
m.ThemomentZol
eka
pl
acesmyf
oodnex
ttomeIf
eel
the
ur
get
othr
owup.
“
Her
e’sy
ourf
oodsi
s”
“
Thanky
ou”If
akeasmi
l
e
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
isnotbackatt
his
t
ime?Thi
sboyi
sget
ti
ngouthandev
er
si
ncehedat
edt
hatbl
i
ndgi
rl
”Say
s
gr
andma
“
He’
sget
ti
ngoutofhandhowi
fImay
askmom”asksZol
eka
“
Didy
ounotseehowhet
alkedt
ohi
s
f
ather
?Ican’
tbel
i
evey
ouj
ustaskedme
t
hatmakot
i”
“
Hewasangr
yhedi
dn’
tmeant
hat
.”
“
Soy
ouar
esay
ingi
t’
sokayf
orhi
mto
speakt
omysonl
i
ket
hatZol
eka!
”Il
ook
atMrNkosi
whoseemsl
i
kehe’
sindeep
t
houghs.Icanseet
hatwhat
Lwandl
elwenkosi
sai
dgott
ohi
m.I
wonderwhathappenedt
heywayt
hey
ar
esoi
nlov
eyouwoul
dn’
ttel
lthatt
hey
hav
epr
obl
ems.
“
Idi
dn’
tsayt
hatmamabuthonest
lyy
ou
ar
econf
usi
nghi
m.Hedoesn’
tknow
whatt
odonow.Youar
eal
way
s
br
eat
hingonhi
sneckandIdon’
t
under
standhowwashemi
str
eat
ing
Nandi
byt
ell
i
nghert
hathedoesn’
tli
ke
t
hatshewentt
ohi
sroom wi
thouthi
s
knowl
edge.That
’swr
ongi
nsomany
l
evel
s.”
“
Thi
sisnotLwandl
e’
shouseheshoul
d
buyhi
shousei
fhewantpr
ivacyand
besi
deNandi
ist
hemot
herofhi
sunbor
n
chi
l
dshe’
sal
l
owedt
ogot
hrought
hat
r
oom!
”Gr
andmasay
s
“
Exact
lyt
hemot
herofhi
sunbor
nchi
l
d
nothi
sgi
rl
fr
iend.Lwandl
elov
esMi
ranot
Nandi
,I
’m notsay
ingt
hist
ohur
tyou
Nandi
buti
t’
sthet
rut
hmychi
l
d.Mama
st
opgi
vi
ngNandi
fal
sehope,
youar
e
hur
ti
ngt
hepoorchi
l
dmor
e.She
deser
vesbet
tersomeonewhowi
l
llov
e
herwhol
ehear
tedl
y.
”
“
Nowondermysoncheat
edony
ou…”
MrNkosi
bangst
het
abl
est
art
li
ngal
lof
us
“
Stopi
tbot
hofy
ou!I
t’
senoughnow
l
et’
seatwi
thpeace!
”It
ryt
oeatbutI
t’
s
al
lcomesupsoIr
unt
othebat
hroom
andt
hrowup.Zol
ekai
srubbi
ngmyback
asIt
hrowuponceI
’
m doneIgetupand
f
lusht
het
oil
etbef
orewashi
ngmy
hands.
“
Comel
et’
smemakey
ousomet
hing
el
set
oeat
”
“
NoI
’
mfi
neMamaIwi
l
ljustl
i
edown”
“
Buty
ouhav
etoeatNandi
”
“
I’
m nothungr
yMamaIj
ustneedt
oli
e
down”
“
Okaycal
lmei
fyouneedany
thi
ng”Inod
andwal
ktomybedr
oom.Ichangei
nto
mypj
sandj
umpi
ntomybed.I
m so
emot
ional
rightnowandIf
eel
sol
onel
yI
wi
shmybr
otherwasher
e.It
akemy
phoneandcal
lLwandl
e.
“
Yes”Thecol
dnessi
nhi
svoi
cecan’
tbe
mi
ssed
“
HeyIwant
edt
osayI
’
m sor
ry”
“
Coul
dn’
tyouwai
tformet
ocome
home”
“
Idi
dn’
tknowi
fyouwoul
dcomeback”
“
I’
m sor
ryLwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
OkayNandi
whatel
sedoy
ouwant
?”
“
I’
m cr
avi
ngf
orhotwi
ngsandcheese
bur
ger
”
“
Youwanthotwi
ngsandcheesebur
ger
onl
y?”
“
Yes”
“
OkayIwi
l
lbuy
..
.”
Ihearsomeshuf
fl
ing
“
Nandi
….don’
twai
tupLwenkosi
isnot
comi
ngback.Vubaamasi
kaSno
st
handwasami
abant
wanabawat
handa
kabi
amasi
.Iwi
l
lrepl
acei
t,noi
nfactI
wi
l
lbuyy
oua4l
i
treofmaast
ofeedt
he
cr
avi
ngsnehshar
p”Nor
ahsay
sont
he
ot
hersi
de,
Ihangupandbur
sti
nto
t
ear
s.If
eel
armswr
appi
ngar
oundme
i
t’
sGogoIcansmel
lhersweetscent
.
“
Don’
tcr
ysi
sit
’sgoi
ngt
obeokay
”
“
Itwi
l
lnev
erbeokayGogohedoesn’
t
l
ovemeandt
hisbabyal
lhecar
esabout
i
sNor
ah.
”
“
That
’snott
rueLwandl
elov
esy
ou
sweet
hear
tnott
hatbl
i
ndgi
rl
.Hewi
l
lget
t
ir
edofhery
ouwi
l
lsee.Justdon’
tgi
ve
uponhi
m.Anewpussyi
sdr
ivi
nghi
m
cr
azyoncehe’
senoughwi
thhershewi
l
l
comebackt
oyou.Iknowmygr
andson
okay
”Inodshecomf
ort
smeunt
ilIdoz
e
of
ftosl
eep.I
’
m wokenupbysomeone
shaki
ngme.Ibl
i
nkmyey
esopeni
t’
s
Lwandl
e,myhear
tski
psabeat
.
“
I’
m sor
ryt
owakey
ouupIbr
oughty
our
hotwi
ngsandbur
ger
”Ismi
l
e
“
Letmegowashmyhands”HenodsI
getupandwal
ktot
hebat
hroom t
o
washmyhandst
hancomesback.
“
Thanky
ou”Ieatmyf
oodi
t’
sfeel
sli
keI
hav
en’
tbeeneat
ingf
orday
s.He’
s
l
ooki
ngatmeasIeat
.
“
What
?”Isaywi
thmyf
ull
mout
h
“
Not
hingIj
ustwanty
out
oknowt
hatI
goty
ouNandi
any
time.Youar
ecar
ryi
ng
mychi
l
daf
teral
l
”Inodandcont
inue
eat
ing.OnceI
’
m donehet
akest
het
ray
andcomesbackt
owi
shmegoodni
ght
.
“
Pleasehol
dmeunt
ilIf
all
asl
eep”He
l
ooksatmer
eluct
ant
ly
“
Please”Hesi
ghsandcomest
omybed.
Imel
tinhi
sar
mswr
appedar
oundme.
“
Lwandl
e”
“
Mmh”It
urnar
oundt
ofacehi
m,gosh
he’
sonegor
geousguyIhav
eev
erseen.
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Dontdot
hatNandi
”
“
Buti
t’
str
uey
ouImi
ssy
ousomuch,
y
oucanev
enmakemey
oursi
dedi
shas
l
ongasIhav
eyoupl
easet
akemeback.
Ist
il
ll
ovey
oumi
na”Ir
ubmyf
inger
ti
ps
onhi
sface,
hisl
i
psar
esoi
nvi
ti
ng.
“
Im sor
ryIcan’
tIl
oveMi
ra”Those
wor
dsbr
eaksmyhear
tint
opi
ecesbutI
don’
tgi
veup.Ismashmyl
i
psonhi
s,
hepushesmeback.
“
Whatt
hef
uck!Youar
eoutofl
i
nenow!
Youar
eandIdonegett
hatt
hroughy
our
st
ickskul
l
!!
”Hewal
ksoutl
eav
ingme
cr
ying.Gogomakesherwayi
nandget
s
t
obednex
ttome,
pul
l
ingmet
oher
chest
.
“
YouknowNandi
youj
ustr
emi
ndmeof
my
sel
fandmyl
atehusband”Shet
ell
s
mehowherl
atehusbandandhermet
.
Oursi
tuat
ioni
sal
mostt
hesamebutt
he
di
ff
erencei
sthatherl
atehusband
par
ent
sdi
dn’
tappr
oveoft
hei
r
r
elat
ionshi
pbecauseshewascomi
ng
f
rom apoorf
ami
l
y.Theywant
edhi
mto
mar
ryagi
rlwhowascomi
ngf
rom ar
ich
f
ami
l
ytooandwhenshef
all
pregnant
t
hat
’swhensheknewt
hatshehadt
o
f
ightf
orhermanandshewonhi
m back.
“
Ify
our
eal
l
ywanthi
m backy
ougoi
ngt
o
st
opbei
ngacr
ybaby
!St
andy
our
gr
ounddoy
ouhearme!
”Inodwi
thmy
head
“
Ican’
theary
ou!
”
“
YesGogo”

I
t’
ssocr
azyhowonecanhav
esomany
f
eel
i
ngsf
oroneper
son.Imustsayl
ove
i
sawei
rdf
eel
i
ngbuti
t’
sal
sot
hemost
amaz
ingf
eel
i
ngev
er.Inev
ert
hought
me,
Mir
aMt
himkhul
ucanf
all
inl
oveno
scr
atcht
hatInev
ert
houghtt
hecoul
d
someonewhocoul
dfal
li
nlov
ewi
th
Mi
raMt
himkhul
uTheBl
i
ndGi
rl
.I’
m soi
n
l
ovepeopl
e,he’
sal
way
satt
hebackof
mymi
nd.Iwi
shhecoul
dbewi
thmeal
l
t
het
ime.Hi
spr
esencehasgi
venmyl
i
fe
anewdef
ini
ti
on.If
eel
li
keIhav
enev
er
beent
hishappyev
ersi
nceIwasbor
n.I
f
eel
hisl
ovef
rom t
hedeepestpi
tofmy
hear
tandsoul
.Ihadagr
eatdaywi
th
hi
mtoday,
wer
odeahor
set
oget
her
i
ntot
hesunset
.Itwassomagi
cal
and
beaut
if
ul.He’
ssogoodatpai
nti
nga
pi
ctur
einmymi
ndandt
hatoneoft
he
t
hingsIl
oveabouthi
m.Il
ovehowhe’
s
abl
etogetmewi
thoutt
ryi
ngsohar
d.
I
t’
sbeenaweeksi
nceIwont
he
compet
it
ionandIwassupposedt
ogo
t
hisweekt
oJohannesbur
gfora
meet
ingaboutmyr
ecor
dingdeal
but
mom hav
en’
tbeenf
eel
i
ngwel
lsowe
r
eschedul
edf
ornex
tweekSat
urday
.I’
m
get
ti
ngcal
l
slef
t,r
ightandcent
erf
or
i
nter
viewsbutIt
urnedt
hem down.Ij
ust
needt
opr
epar
emy
sel
ffort
hisl
i
mel
i
ght
Icanseet
hati
tsov
erwhel
ming

“
Goodni
ghtmypr
incess”Heki
ssesmy
f
orehead
“
Nightdaddy
”Hehasbeenav
erygood
dadl
atel
y,It
hinkt
het
her
apyi
shel
ping
hi
m andI
’
m st
art
ingt
ohav
esecond
t
hought
saboutt
aki
nghi
m down.He’
s
r
eal
l
ytr
ying.Hewal
ksout
,mom hadan
ear
lyni
ghtt
oday
.Justashewal
ksoutI
r
ecei
veacal
l
.
“
Hel
l
o”
“
MyDol
l
face”Myhear
tsj
umpswi
thj
oy
“
Heycuddl
ecakesy
ouar
ri
vedhome
saf
ely
?”
“
Yesmyl
oveI
’
m aboutt
osl
eepnow.
Goodni
ghtIl
ovey
ousomuch”Ican
heari
nhi
svoi
cet
hatt
her
e’ssomet
hing
goi
ngonbutIchooset
oleti
tsl
i
de.I
wonderwhatNandi
hadbeenupt
o
becauseIknowt
hisgott
odowi
thher
.
I
’
m get
ti
ngsi
ckoft
hisgi
rlr
eal
l
yshe
al
way
shav
etoseekLwenkosi
’
s
at
tent
ionwhenhe’
swi
thme.Ican’
t
r
emembert
het
imewewer
etoget
her
andshedoesn’
tcal
l
.She’
swor
sewhen
wear
eathi
spl
ace.
“
Ilov
eyoumor
emycuddl
ecakes”He
makeski
ssi
ngsoundscausi
ngmet
o
gi
ggl
e.Thenex
tdayIwakeupanddo
myev
erymor
ningr
out
inewhi
chi
s
t
aki
ngabat
hthenj
oinmom f
or
br
eakf
ast
.
“
Mor
ningmommy
”
“
Mor
ningbabyhowar
eyou”
“
I’
m wel
lthanksandhowar
eyouf
eel
i
ng
t
oday
?”
“
I’
mfi
nebutIwi
l
lgoseeZol
ater
”
“
Okay
”Weeatourbr
eakf
astov
era
conv
ersat
ionwhenwear
edoneIhel
p
herwi
thchor
es.Lat
ewhenmymom and
Iar
echi
l
li
ngcuddl
ecakescal
l
sto
i
nfor
m met
hathe’
sout
side.
“
Mom,
Lwenkosi
isout
sidecanIgot
o
hi
m”
“
Gobutdon’
tcomebackl
atel
i
ke
y
est
erdayMi
ra”
“
Iwon’
tmamat
hanky
ou”Iwal
ktomy
bedr
oom t
ofr
eshenupt
henheadout
af
terbi
dingf
arewel
ltomama.
“
Dol
l
facey
oul
ookbeaut
if
ul”Ibl
ush
“
Thanky
oumycuddl
ecakes”Weki
ss
t
henhebr
eaksi
tbutIst
il
lwantmor
e.I
nev
ergetenoughofhi
ski
sses.Iget
i
nsi
deofhi
scarandhegot
ohi
ssi
de
t
henwedr
iveof
f.
“
Wher
ear
ewegoi
ng?
”
“
Isetupapi
cni
cforusonamount
ain”
“
Youar
espoi
l
ingmet
heseday
s”
“
Youar
emybabyy
oudeser
vedt
obe
spoi
l
ed”
Uponar
ri
val
wemeetourpi
l
otwho’
s
goi
ngt
otakeust
othemount
ain.He
br
iefuswi
thev
ery
thi
ngaf
tert
hatwe
cl
i
mbof
fthehel
i
copt
erandt
akeof
f.We
ar
ri
vet
oourdest
inat
ionneart
heedge
oft
hev
all
eyoft
housandshi
l
lsashe
say
s.Hehel
psmesi
tdownandwe
enj
oyourr
omant
icpi
cni
cov
era
conv
ersat
ion
“
Myuncl
efoundsomet
hingt
ouseabout
y
ourdadbuthedi
dn’
ttel
lmeov
ert
he
phone”
“
Oh”
“
What
’swr
ongnowmyl
ove?
”
“
Not
hingi
t’
sjustt
hathe’
sver
ysweet
ov
ert
heseweeksIt
hinkhehaschanged
baby
”
”
Nohehasn’
tst
handwasami
”
“
HehasLwenkosi
”Hesi
ghsheav
il
y
“
Idon’
tthi
nki
t’
sbecauset
het
her
apyi
s
wor
king.He’
scheat
ingony
ourmom
wi
tht
hatpsy
chol
ogi
stbaby
”Igasp
“
Youl
i
e”
“
I’
mtel
l
ingy
ou”
“
Buthowdoy
ouknowt
hat
?”
“
Rememberwegotcamer
asi
nhi
sof
fi
ce.
Theyar
efucki
ng”Myhear
tsi
nkst
his
woul
dhur
tmymom.
“
Mymom i
sgoi
ngt
obebr
oken
Lwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Iknowsweet
hear
tbutshedeser
ves
bet
ter
.”Ir
eal
l
ythoughthe’
schangi
ng
kant
ihe’
stwot
imi
ngmymom.I
fhe’
s
notbeat
ingheruphe’
scheat
ing.Thi
sis
j
ustt
oomuchf
ormymom.
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Yesmyl
ove”
“
Eversi
ncey
ouwal
kedi
nmyl
i
femy
hear
thasbeenbeat
ingf
ory
ouI
fyou
hur
tmeIsweari
twi
l
lst
opbeat
ing.I
’
m
beggi
ngy
oudon’
thur
tme.
”
“
HeyheyIwon’
tdosucht
hingbaby
.I
l
ovey
ousomuchandt
hanky
oul
ovi
ng
mebackandaccept
ingmef
orwhoIam.
Iwoul
dnev
err
iskl
osi
ngy
ouMi
ra
becausey
ouar
eal
lIwant
.Don’
tcr
y
okay
”Hewi
pesmyt
ear
sandki
ssesme.
Ther
estofourl
unchi
sfi
l
ledwi
thsweet
chat
terandl
aught
er.Lat
ewer
etur
n
backbutwest
il
lwantt
ospendt
ime
t
oget
herwi
thoutdi
stur
bancesowe
opt
edf
orahot
elr
oom.Wear
ely
ingon
t
hebedki
ssi
ng,
hishandsar
erunni
ngal
l
ov
ermybodyandIcanf
eel
mysel
f
get
ti
nghot
.Weundr
esseachot
her
,hi
s
l
i
pst
rai
ldownt
oli
ckandsuckonmy
t
it
ti
escausi
ngmet
omoansof
tl
y.We
hadsext
wicedur
ingt
heweekaf
terhe
br
okemyv
irgi
nit
yandIhav
etoadmi
t
t
hatGuguwasr
ighti
t’
skeepget
ti
ng
bet
ter
.Thel
astt
imei
twasgoodand
al
sopai
nful
att
hesamet
ime.Her
ains
ki
ssesal
lov
ermegoi
ngdownIcan’
t
hel
pamoant
hatescapesmyl
i
pswhenI
f
eel
thef
ir
stst
rokeofhi
stoungei
nmy
pussy
.Hel
i
cksandsucksonmycl
i
t
t
hent
hrust
shi
stoungedeepi
ntomy
hol
e,l
appi
ngupmyj
uices.Damni
t’
s
f
eel
sfogood!Heeatmemypussyl
i
ke
hasn’
tbeeneat
ingf
ory
ear
sunt
ilIr
each
myor
gasm.Hef
li
pmeov
erandl
avi
sh
mybut
tkneadi
ng,
li
cki
ngandsucki
ng.I
f
eel
him spr
eadi
ngmyasscheeksopen
andhi
stoungesweepi
ngdownmy
cr
ackbef
orel
i
cki
ngmyasshol
e.Igasp
wi
thshockbuti
t’
sfeel
ssodamngoodI
t
sendsshi
ver
sdownmyl
egs.Hepul
l
s
meupandI
’
m al
lonf
our
s.If
eel
him
r
ubbi
nghi
msel
fonmywetsl
i
tsendi
ng
f
ir
ewor
ksdi
rect
lyt
omycl
i
t.
“
Ahhhf
uckl
etmeputonacondom I
wanty
ousobad”Hi
svoi
cei
slacewi
th
l
ustIf
eel
him get
ti
ngof
fbedt
hecomes
backsecondsl
ater
“
Arey
our
eadymyl
ove”
“
Yesesbaby
”Ihi
ssbi
ti
ngmyl
owerl
i
p
hesl
i
dei
ntomeandIscr
eam i
tfeel
sso
st
rangel
ygood
“
FuckIl
ovey
ouy
ourpussybaby
!”He
st
art
sthr
ust
ingsl
owl
y,sl
i
dingi
nandout
agai
n,mycr
iesmat
cheshi
sgr
oansas
hepumpsi
ntomedeep.
“
Ohshi
tyourpussyi
ssogoodbaby
!Oh
f
uck!
”Hepul
louthi
scockandt
urnsme
ar
oundt
henpl
ungei
ntome.I
t’
skeeps
get
ti
ngbet
terandbet
ter
.Hepoundsi
nto
mehar
danddeepbutsl
owl
yIf
ind
my
sel
fmov
ingmywai
sti
n
sy
nchr
oni
zat
ionwi
thhi
sthr
ust
s.Our
bodi
esr
ocki
ngt
oget
herl
i
keachor
us.
Todayi
t’
snotl
i
keot
herday
sIf
eel
ike
I
’
m goi
ngt
odi
ewi
thsheerofecst
asy
.I
don’
tknowi
fIshoul
dlaughorcr
ybutI
canf
eel
myt
ear
smaki
ngt
hei
rwayon
t
hesi
desofmyf
ace.Eacht
hrustIf
eel
i
ntenseconnect
ion,
li
keoursoul
is
i
nter
twi
ningi
ntoone.Ourbodi
esshake
wi
thdel
i
ghtandwebr
eakapar
tint
o
eachot
herar
ms.
“
Ilov
eyouMaShwabada”Hesay
s
pant
ing
“
Ilov
eyoumor
eMpangaz
itha”Iwhi
sper
asIt
ryt
ocat
chmybr
eat
h.If
eel
lov
edi
n
ev
erydr
opofmybl
ood,
inev
eryv
einof
myhear
tandev
erymar
rowofmybones.
-

I
t’
sbeenanot
herweekwhi
chmakesi
ta
mont
hsi
ncemyhusbandl
aidhi
shand
onmeandIcoul
dn’
tbehappi
er.Ther
apy
i
sreal
l
yhel
pinghi
mI’
m sopr
oudoft
he
manhe’
schangi
ngi
ntoev
ery
day
.The
wayhet
reat
smenowi
t’
smor
ethen
bef
ore,
wel
lhedi
dsayhewi
l
lgi
veme
mor
ethenwhatIdeser
ve.I
’
m sohappy
andIcan’
tev
enhi
dei
tev
ery
thi
ngi
s
wor
kingoutnow.Myhusbandi
sno
l
ongerbeat
ingmeup,
mydaught
eri
s
happywi
thherboy
fri
endandshej
ust
wonabi
gsi
ngi
ngcompet
it
ionwhi
ch
woul
dpav
ethepat
hforhercar
eer
.I’
m
happyandapr
oudwoman.

Ihav
en’
tbeenf
eel
i
ngwel
ll
atel
ywhi
ch
i
sther
easonwhywedi
dn’
tgot
o
Johannesbur
gthi
sweekr
egar
ding
Mi
ra’
srecor
ddeal
.It
hinkIknowwhy
butI
’
m notcer
tai
nthi
swhatweneedat
t
hemoment
.Letmej
ustgot
oZof
ir
stt
o
conf
ir
m.Af
termydaught
erl
eftwi
th
Lwandl
elwenkosi
Idr
ivemy
sel
ftomy
husband’
scompany
.Idi
dn’
tseehi
m
t
odaywhenhel
eftf
orwor
kbuthe
madebr
eakf
astf
ormeandt
her
ewasa
di
amondneckl
acewi
thanot
esoIwant
t
othankhi
m nowt
hent
oni
ghtIwi
l
l
t
hankhi
m pr
oper
ly.I
’
mthi
nki
ngofa
ni
ghtawayf
rom home.Ineedanew
numbert
ospi
cet
hingsup.

Iar
ri
veathi
swor
kpl
aceandf
indmy
wayt
ohi
sof
fi
ceaf
terIhav
econf
ir
med
wi
thhi
srecept
ioni
stt
hathe’
sin.Imake
mywayi
nwi
thoutknocki
ngandgett
he
shockofmyl
i
fe.If
eel
tear
sbur
ningi
n
myey
esandmychestf
eel
sli
kei
s
cl
osi
ngi
n.Ican’
tbr
eat
het
heycan’
tsee
met
hathowt
heyar
eenj
oyi
ngeach
ot
her
.Thebi
tchi
sont
opofhi
slaps
bounci
ngupanddownandmyhusband
hadhi
sfacebur
iedi
nherboobs.Thei
r
cl
othesar
eont
hef
loor
.Icl
oset
hedoor
wi
thoutmaki
ngt
hem not
icemeand
headout
.

Iknewt
her
ewassomet
hingof
fi
shwi
th
t
hepsy
chol
ogi
stIshoul
dhav
etr
ust
ed
mygut
!WhenIgett
omycarIdr
iveof
f
ast
ear
srundownmyf
ace.Howcoul
d
hedot
hist
ome,
aft
erev
ery
thi
ngheput
met
hroughme?Af
terhepr
omi
sedme
t
ochangei
sthi
ski
ndofchangehe’
s
t
alki
ngabout
?Tocheatonme?My
hear
tisi
npi
eces.I
tpai
nsmor
ethent
he
punchesandki
cksheuset
ogi
ve
ev
ery
day
.Uponar
ri
val
Ist
ayi
nmycar
f
oranhourl
ett
ingi
tal
lout
.Al
lthi
sti
meI
t
houghtt
hesessi
onsar
ewor
kingkant
i
he’
sfucki
ngher
,hemademeaf
ool
!
OnceI
’
m donecr
yingIf
ixmyf
aceandr
e
-
appl
ymakeupt
henmakemywayi
n.

“
Hel
l
osi
s”Isayt
other
ecept
ioni
st
“
Aft
ernoonma’
am howar
eyou?
”
“
I’
mfi
net
hanky
ouandhowar
eyou?
”
“
I’
mfi
nehowcanhel
pyou”
“
I’
mlooki
ngf
ordoct
orNkosi
”
“
Wehav
etwodoct
orNkosi
,whi
chone
doy
ouwant”
“
Bonga”Zosay
ssur
pri
sedt
oseeme
“
HeyZo”Weshar
eahug
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
eisev
ery
thi
ng
okay
?”
“
YesIcamet
oseey
ouIt
hinkI
’
m
pr
egnant
”Shesmi
l
es
“
OkayLet
’sgot
omyconsul
tat
ion
r
oom”Wemakeourwayt
otheher
consul
tat
ionr
oom andshegi
vesmea
cup.Igot
othebat
hroom andpeeoni
t
t
hencomesback.She’
stakest
hest
ick
anddi
psi
tint
omyur
ine
“
Arey
ouner
vous?
”
“
Nowhy
?”
“
Youar
enotokayIcansee,
what
’s
wr
ongsi
s”
“
I’
mfi
ne”Shesi
ghsandt
aket
hest
ick
t
hensmi
l
es
“
Congr
atul
ati
onsy
ouar
epr
egnant
”I
knewi
tIj
ustneededaconf
ir
mat
ion.I
don’
tknowhowdi
ditsl
i
pmymi
ndt
o
hav
eani
mpl
antnowIhav
etomakean
out
rageousdeci
sion
“
I’
mter
minat
ing”shel
ooksatme
shocked
“
Huh”
“
NowZoIwantt
oter
minat
ethi
s
pr
egnancy
.”
“
HayBongawhy
?”
“
It
’sf
ort
hebestZo”
“
Ithoughty
ousai
dhe’
schangi
ng,
didhe
beaty
ouupagai
n”Ishakemyheadno,
t
hei
mageoft
hem f
lashesonmyey
es
”
He’
scheat
ingonmewi
tht
he
psy
chol
ogi
stIsawt
hem f
ucki
ngi
nhi
s
of
fi
ce”
“
OhBonga”Sheget
supf
rom herseatt
o
hugsme.Icr
yinherar
ms
“
Hemademeaf
ool
Zo,
Ithoughthewas
r
eal
l
ychangi
ng.I
tshur
tsomuch”
“
Ngi
yax
oli
sasi
s”(
I’
m sosor
rysi
s)Ipul
l
backandwi
pemyt
ear
s.
“
Let
’sgetov
erwi
tht
het
ermi
nat
ionnow”
“
Arey
ousur
eaboutt
his?
”
“
Ihav
enev
erbeensur
ewhi
l
ewear
eati
t,
getmet
hosef
akev
isasandpasspor
ts”
Ihav
ebeenv
erypat
ientwi
thhi
m hopi
ng
t
hatonedayhewi
l
lchangeandwe
woul
dbehappyagai
nIr
eal
l
ythoughthe
changedbutnowIcanseehei
sfool
i
ng
me.Mypat
iencedi
dn’
tpayof
fIcanf
eel
i
tthatI
’
m goi
ngt
olosehi
m andt
he
saddestpar
tishewon’
tjustl
etmewal
k
outofhi
sli
fef
reel
y.Iwon’
tli
emyhear
t
say
sIshoul
dhearhi
m outbutmymi
nd
say
sit
’sonl
yamat
teroft
imehechases
meoutandt
akehert
obehi
swi
feaf
ter
al
lshe’
syoungandpr
ett
ythenme.
TodayI
’
m choosi
ngt
oli
stent
omymi
nd
notmyhear
t.
HappyBi
rt
hdayTheeßhœr
tbæßë
Magwaz
a

CHAPTER23(
mor
ningsnack-
nyana&
unedi
ted)

Thi
sist
hebi
ggestdeci
sionIev
erhav
e
t
otakei
nmyl
i
feandknowi
ngKhumal
o
i
t’
smi
ghtbackf
ir
ebuthav
ingdoubt
s
nowwon’
thel
p.Ihav
ereachapoi
ntof
nor
etur
n.Iguessi
t’
str
uewhent
heysay
y
oucan’
tsayy
out
rul
yknowaper
son,
I
t
houghthecanbemanyt
hingsbutnota
cheat
er.TosayI
’
m hur
tisan
under
stat
ement
.I’
m sobr
okenIf
eel
li
ke
hest
ompedonmyhear
tandshr
eddedi
t
i
ntopi
eces.Icanf
eel
thepai
nev
eni
n
mybones.

I
’
m notsay
inghewasbet
terwhenhe
wasphy
sical
l
yabusi
ngmebutt
hose
punchesandki
ckswer
ewaybet
tert
hen
t
hepai
ninmyhear
tri
ghtnow.
Emot
ional
pai
nisdet
ri
ment
alas
phy
sical
l
ypai
nbutt
hedi
ff
erencei
sthat
i
t’
shar
dtot
reati
tandcl
i
mboutof
.I
don’
twantar
emi
nderofhowper
nici
ous
mymar
ri
agei
s.Iwantt
ocl
oset
he
chapt
erofmyl
i
fewi
thKhumal
oand
st
artanewchapt
er,
wher
e’st
her
e’sme
andmydaught
eronl
y,j
ustl
i
kehowi
t
wassupposedt
obe.
Ican’
thav
eami
niKhumal
o,t
hatwi
l
l
der
ail
myheal
i
ng.Yest
hebabyi
s
i
nnocentbutIcan’
tit
’st
oomuch,
whati
f
Iendupr
esent
ingmybabyf
orhi
s
f
ather
’ssi
ns?Ihav
ebot
tl
edupsomany
pai
nandI
’
m af
rai
donedayI
’
m goi
ngt
o
pourmyangeratt
hewr
ongper
sonand
hav
ingami
niKhumal
owi
l
lnotmakei
t
easyf
orme.IkeptMi
radespi
te
ci
rcumst
ancesbutasmuchasMi
rawas
notconcei
vedt
hroughl
ovet
hesi
tuat
ion
wasnotdebacl
eli
kei
tisr
ightnow.
Speaki
ngofMi
rat
hisi
sgoi
ngt
obr
eak
herapar
tasshewi
l
lhav
etol
eav
eher
boy
fri
endbehi
ndbutt
her
e’snot
hingI
cando.

“
Arey
ousur
eaboutt
his”Zosnapsme
outofmyt
hought
“
Ofcour
sel
m sur
eZo”
“
Ifeel
li
key
ouar
erushi
ngi
ntomaki
ng
deci
sions.Youhav
etosi
tdownand
t
hinkt
hingst
hroughBonga”
“
Youar
etheonewhosai
dIneedt
o
l
eav
enowI
’
mleav
ingy
ouhav
ea
pr
obl
em whatt
hef
ucknow!
”Icl
osemy
ey
esmoment
ari
l
yandsi
gh
“
I’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
tmeant
oshoutaty
ou.
”
“
Iknowy
ouar
egoi
ngt
hroughal
otr
ight
nowandIwi
l
lhel
pyouwi
thev
ery
thi
ng
y
ouwantbutmyconcer
nist
hebaby
Bonga.Ar
eyousur
eyouwantt
o
t
ermi
nat
e?”
“
Idon’
twantany
thi
ngt
hatwi
l
lremi
nd
meofKhumal
o”
“
Butt
hebabyi
sapar
tofy
ouaswel
l
don’
tfor
gett
hat
”
“
Youdon’
tunder
standZo”
“
Makemeunder
stand”
“
Whati
fIr
esentmybabybecauseoft
he
pai
nhi
sfat
herputmet
hrough”
“
OhBongay
ouwon’
t,
youar
eagood
mot
her
.Ihav
eseeny
ouwi
thMi
ra.I
under
standIt
rul
yunder
standy
our
f
rust
rat
ionsbutt
hebabyi
sinnocenti
n
al
loft
hisatl
eastt
hinkabouti
t”
“
Idon’
thav
eti
meIhav
etol
eav
e”
“
Sti
l
lmybr
otherneedsaf
ewday
stoget
t
hef
akepasspor
ts.I
twi
l
lgi
vey
out
ime”
Igr
oanIdon’
tthi
nkIwi
l
lbeabl
eto
pr
etendf
orday
s.
“
Ican’
tspendmor
eday
swi
tht
hatman
andheknowsmet
oomuchhewi
l
lknow
I
’
m upt
osomet
hingZo”
“
Ify
oucanl
i
eeasi
l
ywi
thoutget
ti
ng
caughtt
heny
oucanacti
t’
sti
met
oput
t
hoseact
ingski
l
lsi
ntogooduse.Your
f
reedom dependsont
hem”Inodt
hisi
s
goi
ngt
obehar
dert
henIt
houghtbutI
’
m
notbacki
ngdown.
“
YouknowIwanty
ousobadt
obef
ree
f
rom t
hatmanandst
artanewhappyl
i
fe.
Youdeser
vei
tBongabutIwon’
tli
eto
y
ouInol
ongerwanty
out
ogo.Ihav
e
f
oundasi
sterf
rom anot
hermot
heri
n
y
ou.If
eel
li
keIhav
eknowny
ouf
or
y
ear
s.Youonl
ywal
kedi
nmyl
i
fef
ora
shor
tspaceoft
imebutIal
readyf
eel
the
v
oidy
ouwi
l
lleav
einmyl
i
fe”Tear
sfal
l
downherf
ace.IcansayIal
sof
ounda
f
ri
endi
nZo.Ihav
enev
erconnect
edt
oa
womanl
i
keIam t
oher
.NomaandIar
e
f
ri
endsy
esbutwear
ejustt
oodi
ff
erent
peopl
eIguessmay
bet
hat
’swhywe
don’
thav
ether
elat
ionshi
pthatIhav
e
wi
thZo.
“
OhZoI
’
m sor
ryIwi
sht
her
e’s
somet
hingel
seIcoul
ddo.Ial
sof
ounda
si
steri
nyouandIwanty
out
oknowt
hat
I
’
m sobl
essedt
ohav
etomeety
oui
n
myl
i
fe.Ipr
omi
sey
out
hisi
snotf
orev
er
somedaywewi
l
lseeeachot
herbutf
or
f
ewy
ear
swehav
etocutt
ieswi
theach
ot
herf
ort
hesakeofoursaf
ety
.”Iwi
pe
hert
ear
sandhugher
.
“
Pleasej
ustpr
omi
semey
ouwi
l
lthi
nk
aboutt
ermi
nat
ioni
fIt
swhaty
ouwant
af
terf
ewday
swewi
l
ldoi
tokay
”Ipul
l
herbackandnod
“
I’
m sur
eyouhav
epat
ient
stoat
tendt
o”
“
Fory
out
heycan’
twai
t”Wegi
ggl
e
“
Thanky
ouf
orev
ery
thi
ng”
“
Wear
esi
ster
sthatwhatsi
ster
sdof
or
eachot
her
.Wheny
ouneedany
thi
ngj
ust
knowt
hatI
’
m aphonecal
lawayokay
”
“
Iwi
l
lkeept
hati
nmi
ndl
i
ttl
esi
s”She
gi
ggl
es
“
Ohpl
easey
ouar
ejustoney
earol
der
”
“
Okusal
ayoI
’
m ol
dert
heny
ou!
”Isay
gi
ggl
i
ngandwal
koutaf
terbi
ding
f
arewel
l
.Mymi
ndi
sraci
ngwi
th
t
hought
sasIdr
ivehome.IhopeMi
ra
won’
that
emef
ort
his,
sher
eal
l
ylov
es
t
hatboyandhe’
sherf
ir
stboy
fri
endi
t’
s
wi
l
lbehar
dforher
.Ipul
lof
fnex
tto
Lwandl
e’
scarandst
epoutofmycar
bef
oremaki
ngmywayi
n.I
mihl
olay
ami
i
nkosi
!Theyar
eki
ssi
nganddr
y
humpi
ngonmycouch
“
Eyni
na!
”Theyj
umpupandseaton
t
hei
rbut
t
“
Mrsk!
”Lwandl
esay
swi
th
embar
rassment
“
Mom uhm Idi
dn’
tex
pecty
ousosoon”
“
Youwant
edmet
ogi
vey
out
imet
o
hav
esexi
nmycouchnev
er!
”
“
Uhm Ihav
etogonow”Heget
supand
r
ushesoutcov
eri
nghi
sbul
gewi
thhi
s
hand.Ichuckl
eandshakemyhead.
“
I’
m sor
ryMama”
“
It
’sokaybaby
…Ihav
esomet
hingt
otel
l
y
ou”Isi
tnex
ttoherandl
ookather
,
Jesust
her
edmar
ksonherneckar
ea
conf
ir
mat
iont
hatt
hist
wohav
ebeen
naught
y.
“
Mir
aIhopey
ouar
epl
ayi
ngsaf
etyI
’
m
notr
eadynj
alot
obeagr
andma”
“
Uhm ehhofcour
semom,
whatdoy
ou
wantt
otel
lme”Isi
ghandhol
dher
handst
henex
plai
ntohert
hesi
tuat
ion
athand.It
hinkshedoesn’
tlook
sur
pri
sedaboutKhumal
o’scheat
ingor
may
beI
’
mimagi
ningt
hingshowcan
sheknow?
“
Saysomet
hingbaby
”
“
Wear
eel
opi
ng?
”
“
it
’st
heonl
ywaybaby
”
“
I’
m gl
ady
ouf
inal
l
ycamet
oyour
sensesbutMamadi
dithav
etobenow.
WhataboutLwandl
elwenkosi
?What
aboutt
her
ecor
ddeal
?”Thesadnessi
n
herv
oicebr
eaksmyhear
tint
opi
eces
“
I’
m sor
rybabyi
fyouandLwandl
ewer
e
meantt
obey
ouwoul
dbe….
”shecut
s
meof
f
“
Nononodon’
ttel
lmet
hatpl
ease.I
can’
tloseLwenkosi
”
“
Ngi
yax
oli
saMi
raIwi
l
ldomyut
most
t
hatonedayy
oumeeteachot
herbut
babyf
ornowwehav
eto….
”
“
Hay
iMama!Whyar
eyoudoi
ngt
hishuh?
Don’
tyouwantmet
obehappy
?”
“
Howcany
ouaskt
hatMi
raofcour
seI
wanty
out
ohappy
”
“
Howmanyt
imesdi
dIt
ell
yout
oleav
e
hi
m buty
ousl
appedmef
ort
ell
i
ngy
ou
t
het
rut
h.Nowt
hatI
’
m happyy
ouwant
t
otakeal
lthatawayf
rom me.Youar
e
sounf
airMamaev
ery
timeIhav
eto
suf
ferf
ory
ourdeci
sions.
”Hert
ear
s
st
ream downherf
ace
“
I’
m sor
rybaby
”Shel
etsgoofmyhands
andf
iddl
esf
ormuf
fi
n
”
Pleaset
ryt
ounder
standbaby
”
“
Under
standt
haty
oubr
eaki
ngmeup
wi
thmycuddl
ecakes?Under
standt
hat
y
oukeptt
ell
i
ngmeev
ery
dayt
ofol
l
ow
mydr
eamsandnowt
hatanoppor
tuni
ty
haspr
esenti
tsel
fyouar
etaki
ngi
taway
f
rom mei
sthatwhatIshoul
d
under
stand?
”Ibl
i
nkbackmyt
ear
s
“
I’
m sor
ry….
”Sheget
supandheadt
o
herbedr
oom.Lor
dwhyi
thav
etobet
his
di
ff
icul
t.Igetupandf
oll
owher
,Ipush
herdooropenbuti
t’
slocked
“
Babyopenuppl
ease”Icanhearher
cr
yingont
heot
hersi
deoft
her
oom and
i
t’
sbr
eaksmyhear
t.Inev
ermeantt
o
hur
ther
.Isl
i
deagai
nstt
hedoorunt
ilmy
but
treachest
hef
loorandhugmyknees,
weepi
ngsi
l
ent
ly.
“
Honey
”Il
i
ftupmyheadandl
ookathi
m
“
what
’swr
ongbaby
?IsMi
raokay
?”
Seei
nghi
m br
ingsbackt
hememor
yof
hi
m bur
ieddeepi
ntot
hathoe.He
cr
ouchesnex
ttome
“
Bonga”Her
ubsmyar
m
“
Ever
ythi
ngi
sfi
neIj
usthadaf
ightwi
th
Mi
ra”
“
OhbabyI
’
m sor
ryshewi
l
lcome
ar
ound”Heenv
elopsmei
nhi
sar
msand
herscenti
sal
lov
erhi
m.Idon’
twant
hi
mtobesuspi
cioussoIst
ayi
nhi
s
embr
acenomat
terhowant
agoni
zi
ng
andhear
tbr
eaki
ngi
tis.
-

Ican’
trememberwhenwast
hel
astt
ime
Icr
iedl
i
ket
his.I
’
m sohear
tbr
okenr
ight
nowandIdon’
tknowwhatt
odo.I
under
standbel
i
evemeIdobutdi
dit
hav
etobenow?Howcanshewai
tfor
met
ofal
li
nlov
eandwi
nthe
compet
it
ionf
ir
stt
hendeci
det
oel
ope.I
knowt
hatshedi
dn’
tknowdadwoul
d
cheatbuti
fwel
eftt
woy
ear
sbackt
his
woul
dhav
ebeenpr
event
ed.

Idon’
tunder
standwhati
sthedi
ff
erence
bet
weennowandt
hen.Ican’
tgoaway
andl
eav
emycuddl
ecakesher
e.Ican’
t
ev
enbegi
ntoi
magi
nehowwoul
dIgo
onwi
thouthi
m.Ohl
ordIl
ovehi
m so
much,
eversi
ncehecamei
ntomyl
i
feI
f
eel
compl
etenowIhav
etol
eav
ehi
m.I
wi
l
lnev
erbecompl
eteagai
n.Myhear
tis
achi
ngandIf
eel
li
kei
t’
sgoi
ngt
oshut
downanymomentf
rom now.Thi
spai
n
i
ssuf
focat
ingme.

Imusthav
ecr
iedunt
ilIdoz
eof
ftosl
eep
becauseI
’
m wokenupbyt
heur
get
o
pee.Icanheart
hebi
rdsout
sidechi
rpi
ng.
I
t’
scan’
tbet
hemor
ningal
readyori
sit
?
It
akemywat
chandf
eel
thedot
s,6:
30
damni
t’
sreal
l
ythenex
tday
.Igetup
andt
akemuf
fi
nthenheadt
othe
bat
hroom t
opee.Af
terr
eleasi
ngmy
sel
f
It
akeashoweronceI
’
m donewi
th
ev
ery
thi
ngIcal
lMal
umeSox
.

“
Mtwana”
“
Hel
l
oMakumehowar
eyou”
“
I’
m goodmt
wanawena?
”
“
I’
m al
sof
ineIneedy
out
otakemet
o
t
hemal
l
”
“
Now?
”
“
Yes”
“
OkayI
’
m comi
ng”
“
Thanky
ou”Ihangupandt
akemysl
i
ng
bagt
henheadout
.Mymom at
tacksme
wi
thahug
“
Babyar
eyouokay
”
“
I’
mfi
ne”
“
Yourmom waswor
ri
edabouty
ou
pr
incess”dadsay
s
“
SitdownIwi
l
lfi
shupf
ory
ou”mom
say
s
“
I’
m nothungr
y.I
’
m goi
ngt
othemal
l
Mal
umeSoxi
sont
heway
”
“
Buty
oudi
dn’
ttel
lmebaby
”
“
Ijustdeci
dednow”IhearahootsoI
bi
dfar
ewel
l
“
Youhav
eenoughmoney
?”Dadask
“
Yes”Iheadout
,mal
umeSoxhugsme
f
ir
stbef
oreal
l
owi
ngmei
nthecar
.
“
Arey
ouokay
?”
“
Yes”Il
i
e
”
Tal
ktomemt
wana”
“
I’
mfi
ner
eal
l
y”Hedeci
det
otel
lmeone
ofhi
sst
ori
est
okeepmeent
ert
ainedal
l
t
hewayandImanaget
olaugh.It
ell
him
t
hathedoesn’
thav
etowai
tforme
becauseIwi
l
laskLwenkosi
tof
etchme
becauseIwantt
oseehi
m buthe
sur
pri
sesmeandsayhewi
l
ldr
ivemet
o
hi
spl
ace.Idomyshoppi
ngwi
tha
shoppi
ngassi
stanthel
pofcour
se.Once
I
’
m donewehav
ebr
eakf
asti
noneoft
he
r
est
aur
antt
henhedr
opsmeof
fat
Lwenkosi
’
spl
ace.I
’
m ev
ensur
pri
sed
t
hatheknowswher
ehel
i
ves.Ont
he
wayIhadcal
l
edLwenkosi
toi
nfor
m hi
m
t
hatI
’
m ont
heway
.

Themomentmyey
esl
ayonhermy
hear
tdi
daf
li
pback.Idi
dn’
tknow she
woul
dcomet
oday
,shesur
pri
sedme.Oh
shel
ookssobeaut
if
uli
nahi
ghwai
st
shor
t,ay
ell
owcr
opt
opandwhi
teni
ke
ai
rfor
ce.Imeetherhal
fwayasshe
t
akessl
owst
ri
deswi
thherl
ongsex
y
l
egs.
“
MaShwabada”Shegr
ins
“
Hel
l
oMpangaz
ithaunj
ani
”(howar
eyou)
“
I’
m goodt
hanksandy
ou”
“
I’
m al
sof
inemyl
ove”Ipul
lhercl
oset
o
meandki
ssherbutshebr
eaksi
tqui
ckl
y
“
Whydi
dyoudot
hatnow”
“
Haaababywear
einy
ourpar
ent
spl
ace
whati
fyoumom ordad’
scomeout
”
“
I’
m homeal
onecome”Ihol
dherwai
st
andwewal
kinsi
det
hehouse.
“
Ihav
en’
teat
enbr
eakf
astdon’
tyou
wannahel
pmemakei
t”
“
Sur
edoy
ouhav
emel
rosespr
ead”I
chuckl
eshe’
ssoobsessedwi
thi
t.
“
Ikhona.
..
what
’si
nthatgi
ftbag”
“
it
’sf
ory
out
ake”It
akei
tandt
akeout
ev
ery
thi
ng.Ther
e’sal
eat
herwal
l
et,
a
col
ogneandst
ainl
essst
eel
keyr
ing
per
sonal
i
zed‘
myhear
tdoesn’
tbeat
wi
thouty
ou-mi
racl
esea’
.I
’m st
unned
t
ospeak
“
Babyi
sthi
sal
lmi
ne?
”
“
Yes”
“
Wowt
hanky
ousomuch,
noonehas
ev
erboughtmeagi
ftex
ceptmyf
ami
l
y.
Ngi
yabongakakhul
ust
handwasami
”I
putmyt
hingsont
hecount
erandat
tack
herwi
thaki
ss.Idi
dn’
tknowi
tfeel
sthi
s
amaz
ingt
orecei
veagi
ftf
rom t
heone
y
oul
ove.I
t’
smakesy
ouf
eel
speci
al.We
maket
hebr
eakf
astt
oget
herpl
ayi
ngand
l
aughi
ngi
nbet
ween.Icoul
dli
stent
oher
gi
ggl
esal
lday
.Oncewef
ini
shwi
thour
br
eakf
astweeatt
oget
herandt
alkabout
any
thi
ngandev
ery
thi
ng.Ther
e’snot
hing
Ienj
oyspendi
ngt
imewi
thher
.Icansee
t
hatt
her
e’ssomet
hinggoi
ngonwi
thher
.
“
Babywhat
’swr
ong?
”
“
Not
hingwhy
”
“
Youar
enotokaybaby
”Shesi
ghsand
t
ear
sst
artr
oll
i
ngdownherf
acewhi
ch
br
eaksmyhear
tint
otwopi
eces.
“
‘Myl
ovet
alkt
omepl
ease”I
’
m
pani
cki
ngnowt
heywayshe’
scr
yingi
s
maki
ngmeassumet
hewor
st.She
ex
plai
nsev
ery
thi
ngandmymi
ndf
reez
e.
“
Youar
eleav
ingme”Isayaf
terawhi
l
e
“
Idon’
twantt
oLwandl
elwenkosi
you
knowIl
ovey
ousomuchbutt
her
e’s
not
hingIcandoabouti
t.Youmeant
he
wor
ldt
omest
handwasami
Icant
i
magi
nel
i
fewi
thouty
ou.Idon’
twantt
o
l
osey
ouIwantt
obel
i
evet
hatoneday
wewoul
dmeetandy
ouandIwoul
d
cont
inuewher
ewel
eftof
fbutI
’
m
scar
edt
hatbyt
hatt
imey
ouwoul
dbe
wi
thsomeoneel
se”Shebur
sti
ntoa
l
oudsob.Ienv
elopeheri
nmyar
msI
canf
eel
myt
ear
sthr
eat
eni
ngt
ofal
lbut
I
’
m notgoi
ngt
olett
hem.I
’
m goi
ngt
obe
st
rongf
ormyDol
l
face.
“
Youar
enotgoi
ngany
wher
ebaby
angi
vumi
.It
’si
mpossi
blet
oimagi
nel
i
fe
wi
thouty
ou.Lov
eli
keour
shappens
oncei
nabl
uemoonwecan’
tjustgi
ve
uponi
t.I
..
”Iswal
l
owspi
ttopushback
myt
ear
s
“
I’
m goi
ngt
ofi
xthi
syouar
enotl
eav
ing
meMi
ra.Notaf
terIhav
efal
l
ent
hishar
d
f
ory
ou”
“
Howwi
l
lyouf
ixi
t”
“
Cal
m downf
ir
stIwi
l
ltakey
ouhome
butIpr
omi
seIwi
l
lcomebackl
ater
”She
nodswhenshecal
mswel
eav
eforher
house.Idr
opherof
fatherhouseand
dr
ivet
omyuncl
e’
shouse.I
’
m shaki
ng
wi
thangerandhur
t.Thet
houghtofher
goi
ngf
arawayi
sshat
ter
ingmyhear
t
i
ntopi
eces.
“
She’
sleav
ingmemal
ume!
”Isayaf
ter
gr
eet
inghi
m.
“
Iknow”Ofcour
seheknowshe’
sthe
onewhowi
l
lgett
hef
akepasspor
tsf
or
t
hem.
“
YouseeKhany
iismessi
ngup
ev
ery
thi
ng!Shewasnev
ersupposedt
o
sl
eepwi
thhi
m!”
“
Stopshout
ingatmeIwi
l
lfi
xthi
s!”
“
Howhuh?
”
“
Imanaget
ohacki
ntohi
sol
dhouse
camer
as.Hei
stheonet
hatki
l
led
I
nnocent
.Ther
e’sv
ideoher
e”Igaspwi
th
shock
“
No!i
nnocenti
sdead?
”
“
I’
m sor
rymany
esheki
l
ledhi
m sowe
canuset
hisv
ideot
oouradv
ant
age”
“
Howy
ousai
djai
lwon’
tbr
inghi
m down”
“
Ihav
ebeengat
her
ingi
nfor
mat
ion.The
communi
tyl
ovesI
nnocent,
hewasv
ery
r
espect
ful
andusef
ulenz
aiz
ingadi
abuy
eacent
eamaj
ali
di.Thatwhatt
hey
l
oveabouthi
m.Ri
ghtnowt
heyar
e
wor
ri
edabouthi
sdi
sappear
ance.
I
magi
nei
fhi
scommuni
tycanseet
he
v
ideoofhi
m bei
ngbr
utal
l
yki
l
led.
”
“
Theywi
l
lgocr
azy
”
“
Exact
lyandy
ouknowhowdanger
ous
anangr
ycommuni
tyi
stheywi
l
lwantt
o
av
engef
ort
heboyandki
l
lKhumal
oor
bur
nhi
m al
i
ve.
”
“
Heneedst
odi
ethat
’st
heonl
ywayMi
ra
andhermom woul
dnotl
eav
ethe
count
ry.
”
“
What
?”It
urnandl
ookatKhany
i
“
Youcan’
tjustbar
ge….
”
“
Woahi
maSpi
j
omswhatdi
dyousay
Lwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Nex
”
“
WowsoNokubongai
spl
anni
ngt
o
l
eav
ethecount
rybuty
ouhav
en’
ttol
d
meSpi
j
oms”
“
Youf
uckedupt
hingsbysl
eepi
ngwi
th
herhusband!Thatwasnev
erpar
toft
he
pl
an”mal
umeshr
iekswi
thanger
“
Itwasf
orme!Iwantt
hatbi
tcht
ofeel
ev
erysi
ngl
epai
nsheputmymot
her
t
hroughandev
erypai
nIwentt
hrough
becauseofher
!She’
snotgoi
ng
any
wher
e!I
’
m goi
ngt
otel
lKhumal
o
t
hat
’sshe’
spl
anni
ngt
oleav
e.Akay
i
ndawooo!
”
HappyBi
rt
hdayMamant
sakoMi
nyuku&
Renei
l
weTshwar
o
CHAPTER24(
unedi
ted)

“
Let
’swat
chsomemov
ieorIcanr
eada
bookf
ory
ouorwecoul
dli
stent
othat
f
avor
it
eaudi
obookofy
our
swhat
’st
he
nameofi
tagai
n?”
“
TheFaul
tinOurSt
arsbyJohnGr
een”I
saywi
thmyhoar
sev
oice.Ihav
ebeen
cur
ledupi
nmybedcr
yingsi
nce
Lwenkosi
droppedmehome.Iwantt
o
bel
i
evet
hathewi
l
lwor
khi
swayar
ound
t
hisi
ssuebutIcanseet
hatmymom i
s
adamantaboutl
eav
ingsonot
hingi
s
goi
ngt
owor
kher
e.
“
Yest
hatone”
“
I’
m noti
namoodMama”Shesi
ghsand
If
eel
mybedcr
ingeasi
t’
s
accommodat
ehernex
ttome.
“
Lookmyl
oveIknowhowhar
dthi
sis
f
ory
ouI
fther
ewassomet
hingel
sewe
coul
dhav
edonei
tbaby
.It
’sbet
tert
his
way
”
“
Iknowmom butI
fyoudeci
dedt
oleav
e
t
woy
ear
sbackal
loft
hiscoul
d’v
ebeen
pr
event
ed.Iwoul
dn’
tbesohear
tbr
oken
l
i
keIam r
ightnow.Notonl
yam Il
eav
ing
Lwenkosi
her
eI’
m al
sodi
tchi
ngt
he
oppor
tuni
tyf
ormet
obeamusi
cian.
Somet
hingIhav
eal
way
swant
ed”
“
Youcanst
il
lpur
suey
ourdr
eam babyi
n
anot
hercount
ry”
“
Thatcoul
dber
iskymom onceI
becomef
amoushewoul
dfi
nduseasi
l
y
andwhataboutLwenkosi
huh?Sov
eleI
j
ustgi
vehi
m backt
oNandi
justl
i
ket
hat
goshi
t’
ssounf
airMama,
ver
y
hear
tbr
eaki
ng”Il
etoutasob,
shepul
l
s
met
oherchestandcomf
ort
sme.
“
Youshoul
dhav
elef
thi
mlongt
ime
ago!
”
“
RememberwhenIt
oldy
out
hatIcan’
t
l
eav
eyourf
atherbecauseIl
ovehi
m and
y
ouwon’
tunder
standbutonedaywhen
y
ouar
eol
dery
ouwoul
d”Inodwi
thmy
head
“
Ithi
nkt
hat
’shappenedsoonert
henI
ex
pect
ed”
“
Whatdoest
hatsupposet
omean?
”
“
Youl
oveLwandl
elwenkosi
wit
hhi
s
baggage”
“
It
’snott
hesamemommydadi
s
abusi
ngy
ou”
“
Truei
t’
snott
hesamebutmypoi
nti
s
wheny
oul
ovesomeoney
ouov
erl
ook
hi
sfl
aws,
disabi
l
iti
esandi
mper
fect
ions.
Il
ovedy
ourf
atherMi
rawel
lIst
il
ldoand
myhear
tisi
npi
ecest
hatI
’
mleav
inghi
m
butt
her
ecomesat
imewher
eyouj
ust
hav
etot
urnapaget
oreal
i
zet
her
e’s
mor
etoy
ourbookofl
i
fet
henapage
y
ouar
est
uckon.
”Iuset
ohat
eitwhen
shesayIwoul
dnev
erunder
stand
becauseI
’
m st
il
lyoungbutonedayI
woul
dwhenI
’
m ol
derandi
nlov
e.I
t
houghti
twi
l
lnev
erhappenbecauseno
coul
dev
erf
all
inl
ovewi
thmel
i
ttl
edi
dI
knowIwi
l
lmeetLwenkosi
.It
’sf
unny
howi
t’
stookmef
ewweekst
o
under
standwhatshemeant
.
“
I’
m sor
ryt
haty
ouhav
etogot
hrough
t
his.Youar
est
il
lyoungmybabyand
y
ouwoul
dfi
ndsomeonewhowi
l
llov
e
y
oumay
beev
enmor
ethenLwandl
e
does.May
beLwandl
ewasj
ustapar
tof
y
ourchapt
eri
nli
febutIdobel
i
evet
hati
f
y
ourl
ovest
orywaswr
it
teni
nheav
enby
t
het
heangel
syouwoul
dfi
ndy
ourway
t
oeachot
her
’sar
ms.
”
“
Iknowhowourl
i
vesdependsont
his
escapebuti
t’
shur
tsMom Ican’
thel
pit
”
“
I’
m sor
rybaby
.I’
mreal
l
ysor
rybutI
pr
omi
sey
ouonedayi
t’
sgoi
ngt
obe
okay
”Il
eti
tal
loutwhi
l
eshest
rokesmy
hai
randhummi
ngasongf
ormeunt
ilI
cal
m down.
“
Let
’sgowat
chamov
iei
nat
vroom and
hav
esomei
cecr
eam”Shehel
psmeout
oft
hebedandweheadt
othet
vroom.
Justt
hent
her
e’sabuz
zatt
hegat
e
“
Iwi
l
lgeti
t”Herf
oot
stepsshuf
fl
esaway
asImakemy
sel
finoneoft
hecouches
comf
ort
abl
e.Secondsl
atershecomes
back
“
Babyi
t’
sNandi
shecamet
oseey
ou”
“
Nandi
?”I
’
m sur
pri
sedwhatdoesshe
wantandhowdoessheknowwher
eI
st
ay
“
Hel
l
oMi
ra”Nandi
say
s
“
HiNandi
”
“
Iwi
l
lgi
vey
ouguy
saspace”Mymom
say
sbef
orewal
ki
ngout
.
“
Comesi
tdown”If
eel
hersi
tt
ingnex
tto
me.
“
Whyar
eyouher
e”Cur
iosi
tyi
nmyv
oice
i
spal
pabl
e
“
Ihav
esomebadnewsf
ory
ou”I
swal
l
owhar
d
“
Whathappened?
”
“
Lwandl
edoesn’
tlov
eyougi
rl
”Il
augh
t
hisgi
rlcan’
tbeser
ious
“
Soy
oucameher
etot
ell
met
hisy
ou
ar
esobor
edneh?
”
“
Ihav
epr
oof
”
“
Whatpr
oofy
ouar
ejustt
ryi
ngt
obr
eak
usapar
t.Thatwon’
thappengi
rl
y.
Lwenkosi
ismi
ney
ouar
ejusthappened
t
obecar
ryi
nghi
schi
l
dbuty
ouar
e
not
hingmor
ethent
hatt
ohi
m”
“
Ohwel
lIhav
ear
ecor
dingl
i
stenher
e”
‘
Ohpl
easeIdon’
tlov
ethatst
upi
dbl
i
nd
gi
rl
.Imj
usthel
pingmyuncl
etoav
enge
t
hemot
herofhi
sdaught
er.Ial
sowant
t
ogett
het
ast
eofabl
i
ndgi
rl
’spussyi
t’
s
sai
dthatt
heyar
esogoodi
nbed’
my
hear
tdr
opst
omyst
omach,
Ima
shaki
ngmess.Icannev
ermi
stakehi
s
v
oiceandhi
sannoy
ingl
aughatt
heend
oft
hatsent
encei
saconf
ormat
ion
enought
omet
hat
’si
t’
sreal
l
yhi
m.
“
Uzi
zwel
ekesi
shel
ovesmenoty
ou!Al
l
oft
hisi
sjustapl
otf
orhi
m.Letmel
eav
e
y
out
oli
cky
ourwounds”Shebur
sti
nto
l
aught
erassheshuf
fl
esaway
.Ichew
myl
owerl
i
phar
dast
ear
swel
l
edupi
n
myey
es.Nononot
hatwasnothi
mit
can’
tbehi
m,t
hat
’snotmycuddl
ecakes.
Hel
ovesme,
hesai
dhel
ovesmeandI
bel
i
evehi
m.
“
Babywhat
’swr
ong”Myt
hroati
s
t
ight
eni
ngandI
’
mfai
l
ingt
oint
akemy
br
eat
h
“
Mir
a!Br
eat
he!Comeonbr
eat
hebaby
!”I
hearmymom’
spani
cki
ngv
oicei
na
di
stant
.It
ryt
obr
eat
hebutmyl
ungsar
e
f
ail
i
ngme.
“
Mir
a!Pl
easedon’
tdot
hist
omepl
ease!
Whatdi
dthatchi
l
ddot
oyou!Br
eat
he
mybaby
!”Hercr
yingv
oicemot
ivesme
t
otr
yhar
derunt
ilIr
egai
nmybr
eat
hing
“
Ohbabywhathappened”Ther
ecor
ding
echoesi
nmyear
s.
“
It
’sal
i
emama,
pleaset
ell
mei
t’
sal
i
e”I
saywi
thashaki
ngv
oice
“
Whatar
eyout
alki
ngaboutst
handwa
sami
”
“
Nononohe’
slov
eme,
hel
ovesme,
yes
hel
ovesme,
hel
ovesmemommy
,he
l
ovesme”Ikeepr
epeat
ingt
hesame
t
hingt
ryi
ngt
oconv
incemy
sel
fbutt
he
r
ecor
dingkeepspl
ayi
ngi
nmyear
sand
t
hemor
eIt
hinkabouti
t,i
t’
smakes
sensebutI
’
mindeni
al
“
Tal
ktomemyl
ove”It
ryt
oex
plai
nbut
ani
nvol
unt
aryl
oudsobescapemyl
i
ps.
Sheenv
elopsmei
nherar
ms,
rocki
ng
backandf
ort
h.Wehearanot
herbuz
zer
,
i
t’
sseemsl
i
kewear
ehav
ingal
otof
v
isi
tor
stoday
.Mom get
supt
oat
tend
whoev
eri
svi
sit
ingandcomesbackwi
th
hi
m.
“
Ithi
nky
oushoul
dcomebackt
omor
row
Lwandl
elwenkosi
she’
sacr
yingmess”
“
It
’sokaymom Iwi
l
ltal
ktoher
”
“
OkayI
fyouneedmeIwi
l
lbei
nthe
ki
tchencooki
ng”
“
Baby
”Hesi
tsnex
ttomeandhol
dsme
butIwi
ggl
emy
sel
foutofhi
sembr
ace
“
What
’swr
ongst
handwasami
”Hesay
s
wi
thashakyv
oice.Ican’
tmi
sst
he
wor
ryi
nhi
svoi
ceori
t’
sjustanact
.Oh
y
es!Howcoul
dIbesost
upi
dhe’
san
act
oraf
teral
l
!
“
Mir
ayouar
escar
ingme”Het
ri
est
o
t
ouchmeagai
nbutIpushhi
m
“
Don’
ttouchme!
”
“
Mir
awhat
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Doy
oul
ovemeLwandl
elwenkosi
?”
“
Ofcour
sebabyIl
ovey
ouwi
th
ev
ery
thi
ngi
nme”
“
Soy
ouar
enotwi
thmet
oav
enget
he
mot
herofy
ouruncl
e’
sdaught
er?You
ar
enotwi
thmet
otast
eapussyofa
bl
i
ndgi
rl
?”HegaspsohhowIwi
shI
coul
dseehi
sfacer
ightnow
“
Ba.
..
ba.
.baby
”Hest
utt
ers
“
Answert
hedamnask
Lwandl
elwenkosi
!”
“
Whot
oldy
out
hat
?”OMG
“
Soi
t’
str
ueLwandl
elwenkosi
,you
pl
ayedme!Howcoul
dyoudot
hist
ome
huh?Youar
esocr
uel
!”Ibur
sti
ntot
ear
s
“
I’
m sor
rybabybutIl
ovey
ouswear
!”
“
Youar
ely
ing!
”Ihearhi
m gr
oani
ng
f
rust
rat
ion
“
Yesbabyatf
ir
stIwant
edt
ohel
pmy
uncl
ebutwhenIgott
oknowy
ouMi
raI
f
all
inl
ovewi
thy
ouIswear
”
“
WowIhav
enev
ermetsuchanev
il
per
sonl
i
key
ou!Whatdoest
hemot
her
ofy
ouruncl
e’
sdaught
ergotdowi
thme
huh?Whatdi
dIdot
oher
?Whatdi
dIdo
f
ory
out
ohur
tmel
i
ket
his?
”
“
Youdi
dn’
tdoany
thi
ngwr
ongbabyI
’
m
sor
ryI
’
mreal
l
ysor
ry.Themot
herofmy
uncl
e’
sdaught
eri
sKhumal
o’sexwi
fe”
i
t’
sabsol
utel
ymakesense!Hepl
ayed
meandIf
all
righti
ntot
het
rap.Theex
wi
feKhumal
oki
l
led.Mymi
ndt
akeme
backt
oourf
ir
stencount
erunt
ilt
oday
.I
wasaf
ool
all
along!
“
Bumpi
ngi
ntomeatt
her
est
aur
antwas
notacoi
nci
dence.Gi
vi
ngme
i
nfor
mat
ionaboutKhumal
oandmaki
ng
mebel
i
evet
haty
ouar
ehel
pingoutof
y
ourgoodhear
t.Maki
ngmebel
i
evet
hat
y
ouruncl
eisj
usthel
pingbecausehe
car
es.Youmademef
all
inl
ovewi
th
y
ouandsl
eepwi
thmet
ogetat
ast
eof
abl
i
ndgi
rl
’spussy,
wowIgi
vey
ouan
awar
dLwandl
elwenkosi
yout
rul
yknow
howt
oact
”Isob
“
I’
m sor
ryMi
raI
…”
“
Youar
esogoodatpl
ayi
ngwi
th
peopl
e’
semot
ionsandl
eav
ethem dead
i
nthei
nsi
de.Ir
eal
l
ythoughty
oul
oveme
butt
hatwassoi
diot
icofmeImeanI
t
wasal
lri
ghtt
her
einf
rontofmebutI
coul
dn’
tseei
t.If
all
fory
oursweetf
ake
wor
ds,
forwhati
swor
thIl
ovey
ouso
muchandIr
eal
l
ythoughtt
hef
eel
i
ngi
s
mut
ual
.Youbr
okemebey
ond
i
magi
nat
ionandf
ort
hatIcongr
atul
ate
y
ou”Iwi
pemyt
ear
s
“
Mir
angi
yax
o…”
“
Getoutofmymom’
shouse”Isay
cal
mly
“
Babypl
ease”Hesay
swi
thacr
ying
v
oiceandhol
dsmyhand
“
Isai
ddon’
ttouchmeLwandl
elwenkosi
.
Getoutpl
ease”
“
Bab….
”
“
Mama!
”Ishoutandshecomest
ous
“
What
’swr
ong?
”
“
Pleaset
ell
himt
ogoandnev
ercome
backher
e”
“
Mir
aI’
m sor
rybabyIl
ovey
ouIswear
andIknowi
t’
shar
dtobel
i
eveme.Iwi
l
l
doany
thi
ngf
ory
out
oseet
haty
ou
meant
hewor
ldt
ome.Imessedupbi
g
t
imeIshoul
d’v
edonet
hatbutII
’
min
l
ovewi
thy
ouMi
ra.Eachpassi
ngdaymy
l
ovegr
owsf
ory
ou.Ihav
enev
erf
eltl
i
ke
t
hisf
oranygi
rl
.Youdr
ivecr
azygi
rl
pl
easebel
i
eveme”
“
GoLwandl
elwenkosi
!!
”Iscr
eam
“
Lwandl
e”Mom say
s
“
I’
m sor
ryMr
sKInev
ermeantt
ohur
t
herIswear
”
“
Justgoboyshedoesn’
twanty
ouher
e”
“
Ilov
eyouMi
ra”ThemomentIcoul
dn’
t
hearhi
sfoot
stepsIbur
sti
ntoal
oudcr
y.
“
Mir
atal
ktome”Shesay
sasshesi
ts
nex
ttomet
henpul
l
smet
oherar
ms
“
Whatdi
dhedobaby
?”
“
Hehur
tmemommy
,kubuhl
unguIf
eel
l
i
kedy
ing”
“
Ohmybabyj
ustt
alkt
oyourmot
her
”
“
Hedoesn’
tlov
emei
twasal
lj
ustanact
!
Howcoul
dhedot
hist
omeMama?I
t
rust
edhi
m wi
thmyl
i
fei
tsel
fbuthedo
t
hist
ome?
”
“
Wenz
eni
sthandwasami
?”(
Whatdi
dhe
domyl
ove)Iex
plai
nev
ery
thi
ngbet
ween
sobs,
from oneupt
oten.
“
Dammi
tMi
rahowcoul
dyoudot
hat
huh!Doy
ouknowhowdanger
oust
hati
s?
Whati
fyourf
atherf
indsoutaboutt
his?
It
oldy
out
ost
opi
nter
fer
ingi
nmy
mar
ri
agebuty
ougoaheadandmake
mey
ourf
ool
!”
”
I’
m sor
rymamaIwast
ryi
ngt
ohel
p
y
ou”
“
Hel
pmemyf
oot
!Lookwhaty
ouhav
e
done!Youbr
oughtt
hosepeopl
eint
oour
l
i
ves!OhLor
dIcan’
tbel
i
eveIt
rust
ed
t
hem!Soal
loft
hiswasj
ustgamet
o
t
hem!Howcoul
dZodot
hist
ousI
t
houghtshe’
sagoodper
son!
”She’
s
f
umi
ngwi
thanger
“
Mom Zodoesn’
tknowaboutt
his
Mama”
“
Youar
esost
upi
d!Obv
iousl
ysheknows
she’
sver
ycl
oset
oherbr
other
.They
pl
annedal
loft
hist
oget
hert
heymade
usbel
i
evet
heyar
egoodpeopl
eandZo
suppor
tedy
ourr
elat
ionshi
pwi
th
Lwandl
etogetwhatt
heywantwhi
chi
s
r
evenge!Whatar
etheypl
anni
ngt
odot
o
y
ourf
atherar
etheygoi
ngt
oki
l
lhi
m?”
“
Idon’
tknowmama”Icr
y
“
Heywenay
ousupposet
oknow!Ai
n’
t
y
ouar
etheonewhowaspl
ott
ing
r
evengewi
thourenemi
esbehi
ndour
backshuh!Youdon’
tli
stenMi
raIt
old
y
out
ost
oppoki
ngy
ournosei
ntomy
mar
ri
agebutwhatdi
dyoudo?I
tser
ves
y
our
ight
!Uy
aphaphaMi
raawul
alel
iyou
t
hinky
ouknowt
oomuch!Howcoul
d
y
ounotseet
hisi
sat
rapwhywoul
d
Lwandl
elwenkosi
andhi
suncl
ecar
esso
mucht
ohel
pyou?Nxst
upi
dbl
i
ndgi
rl
!!
”
Sheget
supandl
eav
emecr
yingmy
ey
esbal
lout
.Thepai
nIf
eel
rightnow
wor
dsar
enotenought
odescr
ibei
t.
Howcoul
dInotseet
hiscomi
ng?How
coul
dIf
all
forhi
ssweetwor
ds?How
coul
dIbel
i
evet
hatt
her
e’sabsol
utel
y
someonewhocanf
all
forabl
i
ndgi
rl
?
Howcoul
dIt
rustast
rangerwi
th
ev
ery
thi
ngi
nme?I
’
mindeedast
upi
d
bl
i
ndgi
rl
.Iwasal
readybr
okenwhenI
methi
m butnowI
’
m bey
ondr
epai
rs.

Ist
ruggl
etowal
koutmykneesar
e
wobbl
i
ngandIcan’
tseecl
ear
lyduet
o
t
het
ear
sthatar
ebur
ningi
nmyey
es.I
geti
nmycaranddr
iveof
f.Howdi
dshe
f
oundoutaboutt
his?Ihav
enev
erseen
hert
hisbr
okenandherwor
dskeep
pl
ayi
ngi
nmyear
s.I
twasnev
ermy
i
ntent
iont
obr
eakherhear
tli
ket
hisI
nev
ert
houghtt
aki
ngdownKhumal
owi
l
l
beadr
agl
i
ket
his.Iwon’
tli
eatf
ir
sti
t
wasal
laboutt
aki
ngdownKhumal
obut
whenIgott
oknowherIf
all
inl
ovewi
th
herev
erysi
ngl
esecond.I
t’
sbr
eaksmy
hear
ttobet
hecauseofherhear
tbr
eak.
Myt
ear
sspi
l
lov
erandf
lowdownmy
f
acel
i
kear
iverescapi
ngadam.If
ind
my
sel
fpar
kedi
nmyuncl
e’
syar
dand
st
epoutoft
hecarbef
oremaki
ngmy
wayi
n

“
Ntwanawhat
’swr
ong?
”That
’st
hef
ir
st
t
hinghesay
swhenheseesme.He’
s
chi
l
li
ngi
nthel
i
vingr
oom wat
chi
ng
soccerwhi
l
eswi
ggi
ngonhi
sbeer
.
“
Shedumpedmeshef
oundoutIwas
pl
ayi
ngher
!”
“
Comesi
tdown”
“
Idon’
twantt
osi
tdown!
”Isaypaci
ng
upanddown.Mywhol
ebodyi
s
t
rembl
i
ngandmyf
acei
swetwi
tht
ear
s
“
Youneedt
ocal
m down
Lwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Cal
m downdon’
ttel
lmet
ocal
m down!
Il
ostherbecauseofy
ouandt
hissi
ck
pl
anofy
our
s!”
“
Yahl
any
akemanj
eyouwer
enev
er
goi
ngt
omeetheri
nfi
rstpl
ace.Don’
t
y
oudar
etal
kshi
ttome!
”
“
Youdr
aggedmei
ntot
hissi
ckpl
anof
y
our
sandnowshe’
shear
tbr
oken!
”
“
Dragged?Heyy
ouof
fer
edt
odot
his
andIaskedy
oui
fyouar
esur
eandy
ou
sai
dyouar
esur
enowt
haty
oucan’
t
handl
eity
ousayIdr
aggedy
ou?You
wer
enev
ersupposedt
ofal
lforheri
n
f
ir
stpl
ace!
”Tr
uebuty
oucan’
tdeci
de
whent
ofal
li
nlov
eorwher
eandy
oucan
nev
erknowwhencanl
ovesl
i
pint
oyour
hear
tandt
ri
ckl
eal
lthewayt
othe
deepestpi
tofy
oursoul
.
“
Hai
sukai
fyoual
soknewwhaty
ouar
e
doi
ngy
ouwoul
dhav
ejustki
l
ledhi
m
y
our
sel
fandst
opcomi
ngwi
tht
hese
l
amepl
ansofy
our
s!Youar
eacowar
d
y
oucan’
tfaceKhumal
o!”Hel
aughsand
get
supwal
ki
ngt
ome
“
I’
m notst
upi
dli
key
ou!Ican’
tri
skt
ogo
t
ojai
lwhataboutmydaught
er?She
al
readyl
osthermot
hershedoesn’
t
needt
his!Khumal
oisnotj
ustanyguy
y
out
hinkki
l
li
nghi
misl
i
keeat
ingpap
andf
lakes!Ev
eni
fIdon’
tgot
ojai
li
tcan
backf
ir
ebecausehehasey
es
ev
ery
wher
e!I
fitwer
eformewewoul
d
bewal
ki
ngont
hatbast
ard!
”
“
Aunt
yBr
endal
efty
ouf
orKhumal
owhy
doy
oucar
eaboutav
engi
ngher
!
Wakushi
yacozy
ouhadnot
hing!You
needt
oacceptdef
eatandst
opact
ing
l
i
kehest
oleherf
rom y
ou.Shel
efty
ou
andwentt
other
ichman!
”
“
Shel
eftmebutshedi
dn’
tleav
eour
daught
er!Shedi
dn’
tfor
getaboutour
daught
er.I
’
mtheonewhot
oldhert
onot
ex
posemychi
l
dtot
hatbast
ardbecause
Iwasaf
rai
dofhi
senemi
esusi
nghert
o
getwhatt
heywantf
rom hi
m!Just
becauseBr
andadi
dn’
tseemeasgood
enoughmant
obeherhusbanddoesn’
t
meanshewasabadmot
her
.She
deser
vesj
ust
ice!Khumal
ocan’
tgo
ar
oundandki
l
lpeopl
easi
fheownst
he
wor
ld.Doy
ouknowhowhar
diti
sfor
mewhenEmi
hleasksmeabouther
mom?HowdoIex
plai
ntoa7y
earol
d
t
hathermot
herwaski
l
ledbyher
husbandandhebur
iedher
!Doy
ouknow
howi
t’
saf
fecthert
hathermom
di
sappear
edonherwi
thoutar
eason!
Mydaught
erdeser
vescl
osur
e
Lwandl
elwenkosi
atl
eastshehav
eto
knowwher
eishermom bur
iedbuthow
woul
dthatbepossi
ble?I
’
mtr
yingmy
bestt
obeagoodf
athert
oherbutIwi
l
l
nev
err
epl
aceBr
enda’
spl
acei
nherl
i
fe!
”
Hewi
pesat
eart
hatescaped.
“
Youshoul
dgonowy
oudi
srespect
ed
meenough”
”
I’
m sor
rymal
umeIwas….
”
“
OutLwandl
elwenkosi
Idon’
twantt
o
r
epeat
.”Isi
ghheav
il
yandmakemyway
out
.Idi
dn’
tmeant
odi
srespecthi
m.I
knowhowmuchhel
oveshi
sdaught
er
andhowt
he“
disappear
ance”ofAunt
y
Br
endai
saf
fect
ingEmi
hle.I
’
m dr
ivi
ng
ai
mlessl
yandmyt
ear
scan’
tst
opf
all
i
ng
maki
ngi
thar
dformet
oseecl
ear
ly.
Ev
ery
thi
nghappensi
nsuchar
usht
hatI
don’
tgetcl
earpi
ctur
esofwhat
’s
happeni
ngunt
ilI
t’
sal
ll
ightout
.

HappyBi
rt
hdayLet
hukut
hul
aHappi
ness
,
Mar
yMpe&Kef
il
weMapul
e

CHAPTER25

I
’
m soangr
y,Idon’
tknowhowmany
t
imes,
I’
vet
oldMi
rat
ost
opi
nter
fer
ingi
n
mymar
it
ali
ssuesbutno,
shedoesn’
t
l
i
sten.Idon’
tthi
nksheunder
standst
he
dangershe’
sput
ti
ngusi
ntowi
tht
his
si
ckpl
anofher
s.Khumal
odoesn’
t
hesi
tat
etoel
i
minat
edoubl
ecr
osser
s,
hel
lwi
l
lbr
eakl
oseshoul
dhef
indout
aboutt
his.Ican’
tbel
i
evet
hischi
l
dhas
beenl
yi
ngt
omeal
ltheseweeks!I
t
baf
fl
esmet
hought
hatZoof
fer
edt
o
hel
pusandshel
ookedgenui
neorwasi
t
j
ustanact
,justl
i
kehowhersonpl
ayed
mydaught
er.Igi
vehi
m anOscar
,Ir
eal
l
y
t
houghthel
ovesmydaught
er.

I
’
m soconf
used,
whatshoul
dbemy
nex
tmov
enow.Zoandherbr
otherar
e
t
heonl
ypeopl
ewhocanhel
pmeescape
butnowaf
terdi
scov
eri
ngal
loft
his,
I
don’
tknowwhat
’sgoi
ngt
ohappen.
Whati
fhel
pingusescapei
sal
sopar
tof
t
hei
rpl
ant
ogetbackatKhumal
o?What
i
ftheyki
l
lus?May
beIshoul
djustt
ell
Khumal
oaboutal
loft
hisandl
eav
eMi
ra
outoft
his.Khumal
owoul
ddeal
wit
h
t
hem butwoul
dIbeabl
etol
i
vewi
th
my
sel
f?Phel
aIknowmyhusbandand
nooneknowshi
m bet
tert
hanIdo.He
wi
l
lmassacr
ethewhol
eNkosi
fami
l
y.

“
MaKhumal
o!”Hi
svoi
cest
art
lesme,
I
l
ookathi
m andsmi
l
e
“
Hey
”
“
Whatar
eyout
hinki
ngof
?”
“
You”Igi
vehi
m anal
l
uri
ngsmi
l
eof
whi
chher
etur
nsi
tbuti
tqui
ckl
y
di
sappear
sasi
fher
emember
s
somet
hing
“
Letmegoshower
,Iwi
l
lcomedownt
o
hel
pwi
thcooki
ng”Henev
ershower
s
whenhecomesbackhome.Ij
ustknew
t
hathe’
scomi
ngf
rom herandt
hey
f
ucked.
“
Okay
”Heki
ssesmyf
oreheadandher
scental
lov
erhi
m makesmenauseous.
Iwi
pemyt
earashewal
ksaway
.How
l
ongwi
l
lIkeeponpr
etendi
ng,
Ihav
eto
f
indawayt
ogetoutofher
e.I
’
mti
red,
cheat
ingwasal
astst
raw.Icar
ryon
wi
thmypot
sandhej
oinsmeabi
tlat
e.
“
Babe”
“
Yes”
“
Ihav
esomebusi
nessdeal
toset
tl
ein
Li
mpopo”
“
Oh,
sowhenar
eyoul
eav
ing?
”
“
Tomor
row”
“
Shor
tnot
ice”
“
I’
m sor
ry,
itsl
i
ppedmymi
nd”Inod,
why
doIf
indi
thar
dtobel
i
eveal
loft
his.Lat
e
Idi
shupandweeatwi
thoutMi
rabutI
’
m
notgoi
ngt
obegher
.Ihav
espoi
l
edt
hat
chi
l
dtoomuch,
shecan’
tmessupand
ex
pectmet
ogr
ovel
.Thef
oll
owi
ng
mor
ningIpr
epar
eev
ery
thi
ngf
ormy
husbandt
ri
pandhel
eav
esaf
tersay
ing
goodby
etoMi
ra.Hewi
l
lbegonef
ort
he
whol
eweek.
“
Mama,
I’
m sor
ry”Mi
rasay
sasshej
oins
mef
orbr
eakf
ast
.Shel
ookssohor
ri
ble,
I
wantt
ohol
dheri
nmyar
msandt
ell
her
t
hat
’si
t’
sgoi
ngt
obeokaybutIhav
eto
t
eachhert
oli
stent
omewhenI
’
m
t
alki
ngt
ohert
hehar
destway
.
“
Leav
emeal
oneMi
ra”Shesi
ghsand
wal
ksawayaf
tereat
ingherbr
eakf
ast
.
Day
spass,
Ihav
ebeent
hinki
ngabout
whatt
odoandIchangedmySI
M car
d
j
ustt
oav
oidZobecauseIwoul
dhav
e
notknownwhatt
osayt
oherasI
’
m st
il
l
t
hinki
ngwhatt
odo.Idon’
ttr
usthernow
butIt
hinki
t’
sti
met
oconf
ronther
.I
f
ini
shmaki
ngmy
sel
flookbeaut
if
uland
headout
.Ibumpi
ntoSoxatt
hegat
e
“
MrsK”
“
Soxhowar
eyou?
”
“
I’
m goodandy
ou?
”
“
I’
m al
sof
inei
sMi
raav
ail
abl
e?”
“
Yesshe’
sinherbedr
oom ar
eyougoi
ng
somewher
ewi
thher
?”
“
NoIbr
oughtheracake”
“
Ohhappybi
rt
hday
”Heusual
l
ybr
ings
Mi
raacakewheni
t’
shi
sbi
rt
hday
“
Thanky
ou”Heget
sinandIdr
iveout
.
Uponar
ri
val
Ienqui
ret
heyt
ell
met
o
wai
tal
i
ttl
ebi
tsoIsi
tont
hewai
ti
ng
ar
ea.
“
Bonga”Il
ookather
,shel
ookst
ir
ed
“
Hel
l
o”If
akeasmi
l
eandwehug
“
Youl
ookt
ir
ed”Wesi
tdown
“
Iwaswor
kingni
ghtshi
ftnowIcan’
t
wai
ttogohomeandsl
eepbutI
’
m
wai
ti
ngf
orDrCel
etodi
schar
geLwandl
e
f
ir
st”
“
Lwandl
ewassi
ck”
“
Nohehadanacci
dentf
ewday
sback”I
gasp
“
Ohi
sheokayt
hough?
”
“
YesIhav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
ocal
lyoubutI
coul
dn’
treachy
ou.Hesust
ainedmi
nor
i
njur
iesonhi
sheadbuthe’
sokay
”I
st
udyherf
aceandt
hewayshe’
stal
ki
ng
shedoesn’
tlookl
i
kesheknowswhat
happeni
ngori
t’
sst
il
lanact
“
I’
m gl
adhe’
sfi
neev
ent
houghhehur
t
mydaught
er”
“
Whathashedone,
hedoesn’
twantt
o
t
ell
mewhathappenedhekeepsay
ing
hemessedup.
”It
ell
herwhathappened
andsheseemsshocked.
“
OhmyGod!
!I’
m sor
ryBonga,
howi
s
Mi
ra?
”
“
Soy
oudi
dn’
tknowaboutt
his?
”
“
Ofcour
senotBonga,
howcany
ouask
met
hat
?”
“
He’
syourbr
otherandhe’
syourson!
Theybot
husedmybabygi
rlf
ort
hei
r
v
endet
taZol
eka.NowI
’
m aski
ngmy
sel
f
i
fyouof
fer
ingt
ohel
pusi
spar
toft
he
pl
ant
oo.
”Shesi
ghs
“
I’
m sor
ryIunder
standhowy
ouar
e
f
eel
i
ngbutIhadnoknowl
edgeatal
l
.I
di
dn’
tev
enknowt
hatBr
endawaski
l
led,
It
houghtshedi
sappear
edwi
thar
ich
manandf
orgotaboutmyni
ece.Ir
eal
l
y
di
dn’
tli
keheract
ual
l
ybecauseshe
wasn’
ttr
eat
ingmybr
otherr
ightbutmy
br
otherr
eal
l
ylov
edher
.Ir
eal
l
y
apol
ogi
zef
ort
hepai
ntheyputMi
ra
t
hrough.Howcoul
dtheydot
hismar
anx
!
Theyar
emaki
ngmesi
ck!
”She’
sso
si
ncer
e,Ibel
i
eveherandImustsaynow
If
eel
bet
tert
hatshe’
snoti
nvol
vedi
n
t
hiswhi
chmeanst
hepl
anofel
opi
ng
canst
il
lgoon.
“
Sowhataboutel
opi
ngcany
ourbr
other
st
il
lhel
pus?
”
“
Ofcour
sehet
oldmet
hathewi
l
lgett
he
passpor
ttomor
row.
”Myhear
tjumpsa
bi
t
“
That
’sgr
eat
,thanky
ouZo”
“
Soy
ouar
ekeepi
ngt
hebaby
?”
“
Honest
lyIdon’
tknow”
“
Thi
nkabouti
t,don’
trush”Wet
alksome
mor
eaf
tert
hatIbi
dfar
ewel
ltoherand
headout
.Ibumpi
ntosomeoneatt
he
door
.Ar
git
’st
hatbi
tch!
“
Sor
ryMr
sKhumal
o”Seei
nghermade
mybl
oodboi
l
“
Wat
chwher
eyouar
egoi
ngKhany
i!
”
“
Woahaggr
essi
vemuch!
”Icl
i
ckmy
t
ongueandmakemywayoutt
omy
sur
pri
seshef
oll
owsme
“
Stopwast
ingt
ime,
youar
enotgoi
ng
any
wher
e.Iwi
l
ltel
lyourhusbandt
hat
y
ouar
epl
anni
ngt
oleav
e!”Igasp,
how
di
dsheknow?
“
Youbi
tch,
youshoul
dbel
ockedi
njai
l
f
orsl
eepi
ngwi
thy
ourpat
ient
s!”She
l
aughst
hrowi
ngherheadback
“
Ohsoy
ouknowI
’
m scr
ewi
ngy
our
husband?Howdoesi
tfeel
shuh?
”
“
Ohy
ouj
ustasper
m di
shnj
e,I
’
m hi
s
wi
fe”
“
Don’
tbesosur
enotal
lofusar
e
sper
msdi
shl
i
key
our
sel
f.He’
seat
ingi
n
mypal
m,Icanmakehi
m mi
ne”Il
ookat
herconf
used
“
YouandIar
egoi
ngt
obesi
sterwi
ves
andI
’
m goi
ngt
omakey
ourl
i
feal
eav
ing
hel
l
!Youwi
l
lpayf
orki
l
li
ngmymot
her
!
Orshoul
dIsayy
oursi
sterAunt
y
Nokubonga!
”Igaspwhoi
sthi
sgi
rl
“
Whoar
eyou?
”
“
Siy
ethemba,
yoursi
ster
’sel
der
daught
er”Iswearmyhear
tst
ops
beat
ing.Iwoul
dn’
thav
erecogni
zedher
ev
eni
fIwant
edt
obecauseIhav
enev
er
mether
.Shewasl
i
vingwi
thherf
ather
.
“
Idi
dn’
tki
l
lyourmot
her
,shedi
edofa
hear
tat
tack”
“
Aft
ershecaughty
ouandmyst
ep
f
atheri
nbed!Inev
erknewy
oubutI
hat
edy
ouasl
ongasIr
emember
.You
ki
l
ledmymot
herandwhenmydaddi
ed
Ihadt
ost
aywi
thmyst
epdad.Thepai
n
t
hatmanputmet
hroughbecauseof
y
ou,
sleepi
ngwi
thy
ourhusbandi
s
not
hingcompar
edt
owhatIhav
ebeen
t
hrough!Youar
egoi
ngt
opay
!!
”She
wal
ksi
nleav
ingmeshocked.Iknew
t
hatonedayIhav
etof
acemypastbutI
nev
ert
houghti
twi
l
lbel
i
ket
his.Iwas
y
oung,
stupi
dandbi
tt
er.Ihat
edhowdad
t
reat
edusandl
ovedhi
sot
herf
ami
l
y.
Nont
ethel
elo,
thedaught
eroft
he
secondwi
fewasal
way
srubbi
ngi
ton
ourf
acesandpr
ovoki
ngusbecauseshe
knewdadwoul
dtakehersi
de.It
old
my
sel
fthatIwi
l
lhi
therwher
eithur
ts
most
,soIf
uckedherhusbandsev
eral
t
imesbutonedayshecaughtusand
hadahear
tat
tack.Thr
eeday
slat
ershe
passedont
hat
’swhendadki
ckedme
outofhi
shousebecauseIki
l
led
“
int
andokaz
i”y
akhe.Thatt
imeIdi
dn’
t
knowIwaspr
egnant
.Ist
ayedi
nmy
f
ri
endspl
acef
ort
woweeksandIonl
y
di
scov
eredt
hent
hatIwaspr
egnant
.I
t
ri
edt
otel
lMf
ani
seni
aboutt
he
pr
egnancybuthebl
amedmef
ort
he
deat
hofhi
swi
feasi
fIf
orcedhi
sdi
ck
i
ntomyhoney
potandhet
oldmet
o
l
eav
ehi
m al
one,
Ithendeci
dedt
ogot
o
Skhal
owhot
urnedoutt
obeacowar
d.
Nont
ethel
elohadadaught
er,
Si
yet
hembaoutofwedl
ockbutshewas
l
i
vingwi
thherf
ather
.Shewas7y
ear
s
ol
dthatt
ime,
I’
m sosur
pri
sedhow
gr
ownshei
snowandi
t’
sapi
tyIhav
e
nev
ermetherbecauseIwoul
dhav
e
r
ecogni
zedher
.Nowshe’
sher
etocause
hav
oci
nmyl
i
fe.Ineedt
ogobef
ore
Khumal
oget
sbackhomet
oni
ght
.

Hav
eyouev
ercr
iedandcr
iedbutst
il
l
f
eel
li
kecr
ap.Themor
etheday
spass
by
,themor
eIsi
nkdeeperanddeeper
i
ntodar
kness.I
t’
sbeenawhol
eweek
si
nceIhav
ebeencur
ledupi
nmy
bedr
oom cr
yingmyey
esbal
loutbut
t
her
e’snodi
ff
erence,
Ist
il
lfeel
li
keshi
t.
Todayi
swor
seatl
eastf
ort
hepastf
ew
day
sImanagedt
ogetoutoft
hebedt
o
cl
eanmy
sel
fandst
uff
edmy
sel
fwi
th
j
unkf
ood.SomehowIf
oundabi
tof
sol
acei
nfood.Ihav
eal
way
sbeena
l
i
ghteat
erbutt
hesepastf
ewday
sI
hav
ebeeneat
ingl
i
keI
’
m cr
azy
.I’
m sur
e
Ihav
egai
nedsomewei
ghtduet
othe
amountoff
oodIhav
econsumedbut
whocar
es?I
t’
snotl
i
keIhav
esomeone
t
oimpr
essorl
ookgoodf
or.Ihav
en’
t
hear
dany
thi
ngf
rom Lwenkosi
,Iwas
hopi
ngmay
behewi
l
lcal
lmeorbegme
orany
thi
ngbutnot
hing,
nott
hati
twoul
d
changeany
thi
ngbutapar
tofme
t
houghtbehi
ndt
hatact
,wer
egenui
ne
andcar
ingi
ntent
ions.Idon’
tknowwhyI
ev
ent
houghtoft
hatar
gh!
Lwandl
elwenkosi
isabast
ardwhouses
v
ulner
abl
egi
rl
stogetwhathewant
.He
doesn’
tcar
eaboutot
herpeopl
e’
s
f
eel
i
ngs.It
houghtI
’
m smar
tbutt
heway
hepl
ayedmeandnotev
enoncedi
dI
not
icei
t’
sjustpr
oveshowmuchofa
st
upi
dbl
i
ndgi
rlIam.

Ial
way
sfel
tusel
essandhopel
essabout
notbei
ngabl
etohel
pmymom
r
egar
dingherabusi
vemar
ri
age,
about
notbei
ngabl
etodot
hingsqui
ckl
yasI
woul
dli
ket
o,aboutnotbei
ngabl
etodo
ot
hert
hingsonmyown,
butt
rustmeI
hav
enev
erf
eltusel
essandhopel
essas
If
eel
rightnow.If
eel
soempt
y.I
’
m
bar
elybr
eat
hingwi
thmybr
okenhear
t.I
t
hur
tst
hatLwandl
elwenkosi
onl
ysawme
asast
upi
dbl
i
ndgi
rlt
ouseasapawn
butwhatcut
sdeepert
hanakni
fei
sthat
mymot
heral
soagr
eeswi
thhi
mthatI
’
m
ast
upi
dbl
i
ndgi
rl
.Ihav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
o
apol
ogi
zet
oherf
ort
hewhol
eweekbut
shedoesn’
twannaheari
t.Iwasj
ust
t
ryi
ngt
ohel
pbutIguessi
tser
vesme
r
ightbecauseshet
oldmet
ost
op
i
nter
fer
ingi
nhermar
ri
age.I
fIl
i
stened
myhear
twoul
dn’
tbesobr
okennow.I
f
eel
sol
onel
yIhav
en’
tbeenabl
eto
r
eachGugu.Idon’
tknowwhat
’sgoi
ng
on.Iwi
sht
her
ewassomeonewhocan
hol
dmeandt
ell
met
hatev
ery
thi
ngi
s
goi
ngt
obeokay
.

I
t’
sev
enhar
dtogetoutoft
hisbed
t
oday
,Idon’
thav
est
rengt
h,If
eel
so
weak.Theysayt
imeheal
sbutt
omet
he
mor
eday
spassi
t’
sthewor
sei
tget
s.
I
’
m si
nki
ngdeepi
nthi
sdar
khol
eand
whenIt
ryt
ocl
i
mboutsomet
hingi
s
pul
l
ingmeback.If
eel
li
keI
’
m goi
ngt
o
t
akemyl
i
fewi
thoutmywi
l
l.Idon’
tknow
whatt
odo.Ihearaknockont
hedoor
andcl
earmyt
hroat
“
Comei
n”Myv
oicei
shoar
sef
rom al
l
t
hecr
yingIhav
ebeendoi
ngev
eryday
.
“
Mtwana”Myhear
tdr
opst
omy
st
omachIwashopi
ngi
t’
smama.
“
Ma.
.mal
ume”Ihearhi
m wal
ki
ng
t
owar
dst
hebedsoIsi
tonmybut
t
“
Youl
ookdi
sappoi
ntedwer
eyou
ex
pect
ingsomeoneel
se?
”
“
Umm y
es,
mymot
her
”
“
Ibumpedi
ntoheratt
hegat
e”
“
Ohshedi
dn’
ttel
lyouwher
eshe’
s
goi
ng”
“
No….
Howar
eyou?
”If
eel
him si
tt
ing
nex
ttome
“
I’
mfi
neMal
umey
ou?
”
“
I’
mfi
net
oo,
Ibr
oughty
ourcake”
“
Mycake?
”
“
Youhav
efor
got
ten?
”
“
For
got
tenwhat
?”
“
It
’smybi
rt
hdayt
oday
”Snap!
“
OhI
’
m sor
rymal
umeSoxhappy
bi
rt
hday
”Ev
eryy
earwheni
t’
shi
s
bi
rt
hdayhebr
ingsmeacakeandI
usual
l
ybet
hef
ir
stonet
owi
shhi
ma
happybi
rt
hday
,Iguesst
odayi
t’
ssl
i
pped
mymi
ndwi
thev
ery
thi
ngt
hati
s
happeni
ng.
“
I’
mreal
l
ysor
ry”
“
What
’sgoi
ngonMi
ra”
“
Whatdoy
oumean?
”
“
Thi
sismey
out
alki
ngt
o,t
alkt
omeI
’
m
her
efory
ou”Hepul
l
smei
nhi
sar
ms.
Hav
ingsomeonet
ohol
dmei
nthear
ms
f
ort
hef
ir
stt
imesi
nceIf
oundoutabout
ev
ery
thi
ngopenst
apsf
orme.Icr
yhar
d
agai
nsthi
schestandhe’
shol
dingme
t
ight
ly.
“
Shhhi
t’
sokaymt
wanaI
’
m her
e,Iwi
l
l
al
way
sbeher
eforasl
ongasy
ouneed
me”OhhowIwasl
ongi
ngt
oheart
hose
wor
dsf
ort
hewhol
eweek,
comi
ngf
rom
someonewhot
rul
ycar
es.
“
Hehur
tmemal
ume,
het
oremyhear
t
i
ntopi
ecesandnowmymom i
sangr
yat
me”Igaspbet
weensobsandcont
inue
nar
rat
ingwhathappened.Ihearhi
s
hear
tbeatr
aci
ngagai
nsthi
schestand
hi
shol
dar
oundmybodyi
sti
ght
eni
ng
t
hatIf
eel
li
kemybonesar
egoi
ngt
o
cr
ashbuti
tsf
eel
ssogood.If
eel
li
keI
mat
teri
nhi
sar
ms.Hi
sbr
eat
hingi
s
heav
y,Iknowhe’
sfumi
ngwi
thanger
.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evehedi
dthatt
oyou!
Bast
ardI
’
m goi
ngt
oki
l
lhi
m!I
’
m sor
ry
mt
wanaf
ort
hepai
nheputy
out
hrough.
He’
sast
upi
dboywhodoesn’
tknowhow
t
otr
eatapr
incessl
i
key
ouandI
’
m goi
ng
t
oteachhi
m al
essonhewi
l
lnev
er
f
orget
!”
“
Dodon’
tany
thi
nguncl
e,Iwast
hef
ool
.
I
’
mtheonewhowassupposedt
oknow
t
hathewaspl
ayi
ngmef
rom t
hef
ir
st
pl
ace.I
’
m ast
upi
dbl
i
ndgi
rl
”
“
No,
no,
don’
tsayt
hatMi
ray
ouar
enot
st
upi
d”
“
Iam mal
umehowcoul
dInotseeal
lof
t
his?Mymom i
sri
ghtI
’
mjustast
upi
d
bl
i
ndgi
rl
”Her
eleasesahugebr
eat
hand
pul
l
smebackwi
thbot
hhi
shands
cuppi
ngmyf
ace.
“
Youar
enotst
upi
ddoy
ouhearme?You
ar
eabeaut
if
ul,
int
ell
i
gent
,sex
y,good
hear
tedl
ady
.Nev
erl
i
stent
opeopl
ewho
t
ell
youot
her
wise,
doy
ouhearme”I
shakemyheadnoast
ear
sst
ream down
myf
ace
“
Youar
ejustt
ryi
ngt
omakemef
eel
bet
termal
ume.Youknowi
t’
str
uet
hat
I
’
m st
upi
d.Youev
enwar
nedmeabout
Lwenkosi
butIdi
dn’
tli
stent
oyou”
“
Mir
ali
stent
ome,
don’
tal
l
owt
hat
scumbagt
omakey
oubel
i
ttl
eyour
sel
f.
Youar
eamaz
ingMi
ra,
themost
beaut
if
ull
adyIhav
eev
erseen.Youhav
e
abeaut
if
ulv
oicet
hatcanbr
ingt
his
wor
ldi
ntot
heknees….
”Icuthi
m shor
t
“
I’
m sor
rybuty
ouar
ely
ingmal
ume,
I’
m
j
ustast
upi
dbl
i
ndgi
rl
,acur
seofachi
l
d
t
hatshoul
dhav
edi
edwhenshewas
bor
n….
”Heshutmeupwi
thhi
sli
pson
mi
ne,
kissi
ngmepassi
onat
elyi
ts
cat
chesmeof
fguar
d.Icant
ast
ethe
sal
tofmyt
ear
sandmucus,
hesuckmy
l
i
psgent
lyandshov
ehi
stonguei
ntomy
mout
h,car
essi
ngmyt
onguewi
thhi
s.I
can’
thel
pamoant
hatescapesmyl
i
ps.
Hi
sli
psar
esof
tandwel
comi
ngIcan’
t
hel
pmy
sel
fbutr
espondsbuthebr
eaks
t
heki
ssandgr
oans
“
FuckI
’
m sor
ryI
…”
“
Don’
tst
oppl
ease”Isaysof
tl
y
“
Mtwana…”
“
Please”Iwhi
sperasIf
iddl
emyhands
onhi
sfaceandpul
lhi
m cl
osert
omy
f
ace.Hebr
usheshi
sli
psonmi
neand
l
i
cksmyl
owerl
i
pwi
thhi
stonguet
hen
capt
uresmyl
i
psi
ntohi
s.Theki
ss
deepensandourt
onguedancet
othe
samet
unesendi
nganel
ect
ri
cspar
k
t
hroughmyal
lbody
.Damnhe’
ssucha
damngoodki
sser
.Hehasn’
ttouchme
butIcanf
eel
mysel
fget
ti
ngwetj
ustby
hi
sli
psandt
ongueonmyl
i
ps.Imoani
n
hi
smout
hasIf
eel
hishandscuppi
ng
myboobsundermypj
top.
“
Ohshi
t!
”Hegr
owl
sagai
nstmyl
i
psand
pul
l
sback
“
Don’
tthi
nkabouti
ttoomuchDl
ami
ni”I
saysof
tl
y.Hesmasheshi
sli
psonmi
ne
andki
ssesmewhi
l
esl
owl
ytaki
ngof
f
mypj
s.
“
Youhav
eabeaut
if
ulbodybaby
”Hi
s
v
oicei
slacewi
thsat
isf
act
ionbef
oreI
ev
enr
epl
yhecapt
uresmyl
i
psi
ntoa
sul
tr
yki
ssImoansof
tl
y.Het
rai
lhi
sli
ps
al
ongmyj
awt
othespotundermyear
andni
bbl
esmyear
lobepl
ayf
ull
y.If
eel
ar
ousal
rol
l
ingt
hroughme,
hegent
lyl
ay
mebackandgl
i
dehi
sli
pssl
owl
yata
maddeni
ngl
ysl
owpace,
rai
ningki
sses
af
terki
ssesal
lov
ermybody
.Het
akes
of
fmypant
iesandr
eleaseagr
uffsound
causi
nggoosebumpsonmybody
.He
f
li
psmeov
erandIgaspatf
eel
ofhi
s
mout
hgoi
ngdownt
omybut
t,ni
bbl
i
ng
myasscheeksgent
ly.Idon’
tcar
eabout
any
thi
ngatt
hismomentex
ceptt
his
sheerofecst
asyIf
eel
inmybodyandI
wantt
ohol
dont
oitf
orev
er.Her
unhi
s
l
i
psont
hebackofmyt
highsbef
ore
spr
eadi
ngmyl
egsapar
tandpl
ungehi
s
t
onguei
ntomywetcunti
nqui
ckst
rokes.
“
AhhhhMpendul
oooo”Imoanl
oudl
y,he
f
li
pmeonmybackandhookmyl
egson
hi
sshoul
der
s.If
eel
hist
onguel
i
cki
ng
meupl
i
kei
cecr
eam,
her
unshi
stongue
att
heedgesofmyf
oldsandswi
rl
s
ar
oundmycl
i
t.OhmyGod!Icl
enchon
t
hebl
anket
sasIf
eel
elect
ri
cspar
ks
r
adi
ati
ngt
hroughmywhol
ebody
.
“
Ohmy
,it
’sf
eel
ssodamngood”He
dr
iveshi
stonguedeeperwhi
l
epl
ayi
ng
wi
thmycl
i
twi
thhi
sfi
nger
.Icanf
eel
my
or
gasm cl
osebuthest
opsandki
sses
hi
swayupt
ome.Thesmel
lofmyj
uices
i
nhi
smout
hsendsmeov
ert
heedge.I
f
iddl
esonhi
st-
shi
rtandheget
sthe
messageandt
akesofal
lhi
scl
othes.
Thewar
mthofhi
sbodyont
opofmi
ne
i
ssoot
hing,
Ifeel
hiscocksl
i
ding
bet
weenmyl
i
pst
henhepusheshi
s
cockatmyent
ranceunt
ilIf
eel
him deep
i
nsi
deofme.Damnhef
eel
ssohugei
t’
s
ev
enat
aduncomf
ort
abl
e.
“
Jesusss!
”That
’sal
lhemanaget
out
ter
ashel
i
einsi
deofmef
oramoment
wi
thoutmov
ing
“
It
’sf
eel
sli
kehome”Hest
art
srol
l
inghi
s
hi
psandIf
eel
hisf
ingerf
li
cki
ngatmy
cl
i
tashet
hrusthar
der
.If
eel
li
keI
’
m
goi
ngdi
eduet
oecst
asymyi
ncoher
ent
scr
eamsandhi
sgr
oansf
il
lsmy
bedr
oom.Hepul
l
smyonel
egonhi
s
oneshoul
derandpumpsi
ntome.
“
Shi
tmt
wana!Youar
eamaz
ingt
hanI
ev
eri
magi
ned!Fucki
nghooot
!”Thr
ust
byt
hrusthe’
staki
ngmet
othewor
ldof
sheerecst
asy
.Myscr
eamsmat
cheshi
s
andourbodi
eswr
it
hewi
thsweataswe
ex
plode.Ri
ghtatt
hatmomentIhearhi
s
v
oice,
almostawhi
sper
“
Do.
.Dol
l
face”myhear
tst
opsbeat
ing.
“
Ufunani
wenal
a!”(
Whatar
eyoudoi
ng
her
e!)mal
umeSoxsay
sasj
umpsof
f
me.
“
I’
m sor
ryt
oint
err
upt
”Iheart
hedoor
shut
ti
ngandmyhear
tbr
eaksasgui
l
ty
washesov
erme.GoshwhydoIf
eel
so
hor
ri
blet
hathesawus!
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayShar
ynNompi
l
o
Shaz
zMohono&Si
yabongaCany
cios
Luphoko

CHAPTER26

Ther
e’sapar
tofmet
hatwant
stogo
af
terhi
m andex
plai
nbutanot
herpar
tof
mei
sref
usi
ng.Idon’
towehi
m any
ex
planat
ions,
hebr
okemyhear
t
t
her
efor
ehehol
dsnospeci
alpl
acei
n
myl
i
fe.WhatIdowi
thmyl
i
fedoesn’
t
concer
nhi
m any
mor
e.Hi
sfi
nger
ti
ps
car
essi
ngmycheekbr
ingsmeback
f
rom myt
rance.
“
Mtwana?
”Icl
earmyt
hroat
,Isuddenl
y
hav
eal
umpcl
oggi
ngi
nmyt
hroat
“
Mal
ume”Ir
espond,
Ican’
tmi
sst
he
uncer
tai
ntyi
nmyv
oice.I
sitst
il
lal
ri
ght
t
ocal
lhi
m myuncl
eaf
terwhat
happened?
“
I’
m sor
ry”I
tcomesasal
mostawhi
sper
“
Forwhat
?”
“
Fort
aki
ngadv
ant
ageofy
ou,
Ishoul
dn’
t
hav
elett
hishappen”
“
ButIwant
edi
tto,
I’
mtheonewho
beggedy
ou”
“
That
’snotanex
cuse,
youar
ehur
ti
ng
andv
ulner
abl
e.Ishoul
dhav
egi
veny
ou
ashoul
dert
ocr
yonnott
his,
fuck!
”He
gr
oans
“
Ahcomeon,
stopbeat
ingy
our
sel
f
abouti
tyougott
otast
ethepussyofa
bl
i
ndgi
rlandIgott
ofor
getaboutmy
pai
nfort
hatmoment
.Seei
t’
sawi
n-wi
n
si
tuat
ion”Ir
eal
l
yenj
oyed,
hegav
emeso
damngood.Icoul
dgoonandont
he
whol
edayj
ustt
onotf
eel
thepai
n
bur
ningmysoul
.
“
Wowr
eal
l
yMi
ra”Hesay
swi
thal
ow
v
oicebutI
’
m unabl
etodeci
pheran
emot
ionl
aidoutt
hroughhi
svoi
ce
“
What
?”
“
Ist
hathowy
out
hinkofme?Somei
diot
whoj
ustwant
edt
otast
eyourpussy
!
Your
eal
l
ythi
nksol
owofmeMi
raandI
won’
tli
etoy
oui
thur
ts.Hav
eIev
er
t
reat
edy
oul
i
ket
rash?Hav
eIev
ermade
y
ouf
eel
li
key
ouar
eusel
ess?Hav
eI
ev
ermadey
ouf
eel
li
key
ouar
eat
oy
t
hatshoul
dbeusedf
orsex
ual
desi
res?
”
Thepai
ninhi
svoi
cecutdeepi
nmy
hear
t,okayt
hatcameoutwr
ong.Idi
dn’
t
meanti
tli
ket
hat
“
NoI
’
m sor
ry”
“
IknowIwasaj
erkf
ornotbei
ngabl
eto
hol
dmy
sel
fbutt
hewayy
ouseemei
s
wayt
oodemeani
ng.Toy
oui
t’
swasa
mat
terofr
eli
evi
ngst
ressornumbi
ng
t
hepai
nbutt
omei
t’
smeantt
hewhol
e
wor
ld.Youhav
enoi
deahowhar
dithas
beenf
orme,
hav
ingt
osuppr
essmy
f
eel
i
ngsf
ory
ou.Il
ovey
ouMi
ra”Igasp
wi
thshock,
Iabsol
utel
ydi
dn’
tex
pect
t
his.
“
Iknowi
t’
scomesasshockbuti
t’
sthe
damnt
rut
h.Thev
eryf
ir
stt
imeIsawy
ou
somet
hingi
nmemov
ed.Youwer
eonl
y
15y
ear
sol
d,Idi
dn’
twantt
oov
erwhel
m
y
ouandMrKt
rust
edme.It
oldmy
sel
fI
wi
l
lwai
tfory
out
ogr
owbuti
twashar
d
becauseev
erysi
ngl
edaymyl
ovef
or
y
ougr
ewnomat
terhowIt
ri
edt
o
suppr
essi
t.Wheny
out
urned18I
t
houghty
ouar
eol
denoughnowandI
want
edt
omakeamov
ebutIcoul
dn’
t
becauseLwandl
elwenkosi
camei
ntot
he
pi
ctur
eandi
tdi
dn’
thel
pthat
…”He
pausesandsi
ghs“
I’
m nott
ell
i
ngy
ou
t
hist
oconf
usey
ouorsay
ingt
hinkabout
i
t.Ihav
emadepeacet
haty
ouandIcan
nev
erbet
oget
herandIwant
edy
out
o
knowt
haty
ouar
enotj
ustat
oyt
hatI
want
edt
ouset
oful
fi
lmysex
ual
desi
res
butaspeci
alsomebodyt
hatwi
l
lal
way
s
hol
dsaspeci
alpl
acei
nmyhear
t”Wow
t
hatwas.
..
Idon’
tknowwhatshoul
dbe
t
hewor
d.I
’
m st
il
ldi
zzyf
rom t
hat
conf
essi
on,
itcaughtmeof
fguar
d.
“
Doy
ouwantt
ohav
eyourcakenowas
br
eakf
astorshoul
dImakey
ou
br
eakf
astf
ir
st?
”
“
Iwi
l
lhav
ethecakeasbr
eakf
astbutI
wantt
ohav
eabat
hfi
rst
”
“
Iwi
l
lmakey
ourbedt
henwhi
l
eyouar
e
ati
t”Isl
i
demynakedbodyoutoft
he
bedandf
iddl
esf
ormymuf
fi
nbef
ore
maki
ngmywayt
othebat
hroom.It
ake
al
ongshowerj
ustt
hinki
ngabout
ev
ery
thi
ng.Ican’
thel
pthegui
l
tthat
keepcr
eepi
ngi
nwhenIt
hinkabout
Lwenkosi
.Imi
sshi
m somuchIwon’
tli
e
andIhat
emy
sel
fthatIdo.Asf
or
mal
umeSox
’sconf
essi
on,
I’
m st
unned
t
ospeak.Hesai
dhedoesn’
tex
pect
any
thi
ngbutIcan’
tst
opt
hinki
ngabout
whathesai
dthough.Hesoundedso
genui
neandhehasal
way
sbeensuper
ni
cet
ome.I
’
m sur
eIwoul
dhav
ebeen
t
hespoi
l
tgi
rl
fr
iendi
nthewhol
ewor
ld.
Ohwel
l
,iti
swhati
tisnow.If
ini
sh
t
aki
ngashowerandheadt
omy
bedr
oom t
olot
ionmybody
.OnceI
’
m
donemoi
stur
izi
ngmybodyIl
ookf
or
somet
hingt
owear
.It
’sseemsl
i
keIhav
e
r
unoutoft
hingst
owear
,sot
hiswoman
i
snotonl
ygi
vi
ngmesi
l
entt
reat
ment
she’
sal
sonotdoi
ngmyl
aundr
y.Doi
ng
l
aundr
yisoneoft
het
hingst
hatIcan’
t
do.Iwi
pemyt
ear
sandl
ookf
or
somet
hingt
owearbutI
’
m notsat
isf
ied
wi
thwhatIf
indt
hatopensf
loodgat
es.
“
Heymt
wana”If
eel
hishandswr
appi
ng
ar
oundmeandhi
sli
psont
hebackof
myneckwhi
chsendsamessaget
othe
wr
ongpl
ace.
“
Don’
tcr
y,i
t’
sgoi
ngt
obeokay
”Inodmy
head
“
Whatar
eyoul
ooki
ngf
orIwi
l
lhel
pyou”
“
Ican’
tfi
ndi
t,mom di
dn’
tdomy
l
aundr
y”
“
Youst
il
ll
ookbeaut
if
ulwi
thoutcl
othes
ont
houghmt
wana”Ichuckl
e,het
urns
mear
oundandpl
aceasof
tpeckonmy
f
orehead
“
Stopcr
ying,
youar
erui
ningy
our
beaut
y”Ismi
l
eandwi
pemyt
ear
s
“
Let
’sgetoutofher
ebef
orey
ourmot
her
comesbackandf
indy
ouhal
fnaked
wi
thmei
nyourbedr
oom.I
t’
stooear
ly
f
ordr
ama”Igi
ggl
eandl
ookf
ormy
gown,
whenIgeti
tIweari
twi
thmy
sl
i
pper
sthenweheadt
othel
i
vingr
oom
andhav
eapi
eceofcakewi
thcof
fee
whi
l
eli
steni
ngt
ohi
m wi
thhi
shi
l
ari
ous
ex
agger
ati
onst
ori
es.Heal
way
shasa
wayt
oshi
ftmymi
ndf
rom any
thi
ngand
makemel
augh.
-

I
’
m atmugandbeanhav
ingachocol
ate
cake.Ineedi
ttocr
ackmybr
ainopen
aboutt
hiswhol
esi
tuat
ion.I
’
m st
il
l
shockedt
hatKhany
iismyni
ece.Somy
husbandi
sfucki
ngmyni
eceIwon’
tli
eit
hur
tsespeci
all
ynowt
hatshe’
sdoi
ng
t
hist
omakemepay
.Si
gh!If
ini
sheat
ing
mycakeandpayt
hebi
l
lst
henheadout
.
Ir
eleaseahugesi
ghbef
oreknocki
ngon
herdoor
.IhopewhatI
’
m doi
ngwi
l
lhel
p.
“
Comei
n!”Sheshout
sont
heot
hersi
de
oft
her
oom.Ipusht
hedooropenand
herey
esar
edar
ti
ngonme.
“
Sist
erWi
fe”Shesay
swi
thasmi
rk,
I
l
ookatherandf
orabr
iefmomentI
don’
tknowwhatI
’
m goi
ngt
osay
“
Idon’
thav
ethewhol
edaysi
sterwi
fe
andy
oudi
dn’
tmakeanappoi
ntment
”I
si
ghandgr
abaseat
.
“
LookI
’
m sor
ryaboutev
ery
thi
ng.Inev
er
meantt
ocausey
ourmom’
sdeat
h.Iwas
y
oungandst
upi
dIshoul
dn’
thav
esl
ept
wi
thy
ourmot
her
’shusband.Ihat
edher
y
ouknow,
shet
ookmypl
ace.The
at
tent
iont
hatdadusedgi
veme,
hisl
ast
bor
nwasal
ldi
ver
tedt
oherand
suddenl
ymymom andmysi
ster
sdi
dn’
t
mat
ter
.I’
m sor
ryokayI
’
mreal
l
ysor
ryi
t
wasnev
ermyi
ntent
iont
oroby
ouof
y
ourmot
her
.Youknowwheny
ouar
e
angr
y,y
oudosomest
upi
dthi
ngsj
ustt
o
pr
oveapoi
nt.I
’
m sor
rySi
yet
hembaf
rom
t
hedeepestofmyhear
t.IknowIdon’
t
deser
vey
ourf
orgi
venessbutI
’
m wi
l
li
ng
t
odoany
thi
ngf
ory
out
ofor
giv
eme.I
’
m
y
ourauntSi
yeandy
ouar
emyni
ece
whi
chmakesy
oumydaught
eraswel
l
.I
wantt
obet
her
efory
ou”
“
I’
m notgoi
ngt
ofor
giv
eyouNokubonga
y
our
uinedmyl
i
fe!You.
..
you.
..
you”She
wi
peshert
ear
sthatkeepf
all
i
ng
“
I’
m her
efory
ouSi
ye…”
“
Her
eformemyf
oot
!Getoutofher
e!”
“
Siy
e…”
“
Phuma!
”(Getout
!)Igetupandwal
kout
.
Thepai
nIsawi
nherey
esi
shaunt
ing
me.I
t’
sjustshowst
hatev
ery
oneofusi
s
br
okeni
nsi
dei
ncl
udi
ngt
heonest
hatar
e
supposedt
obehel
pingust
ofaceour
demonsort
hatt
oowaspar
tofr
evenge,
she’
snotapsy
chol
ogi
st.Thatwoul
dn’
t
sur
pri
seme.Ir
eal
l
ywi
shwecanputt
his
behi
ndus.I
’
m wi
l
li
ngt
opl
ayar
oleofa
mot
hert
oher
.Icani
magi
nehowi
tmust
hav
ebeenhar
dtol
oseherpar
ent
sat
suchat
enderage.Sheal
soment
ioned
t
hatMf
ani
seni
causedhersomuchpai
n.
Iwonderwhatdi
dthatbast
arddot
oher
,
t
hisj
ustmakemenotr
egr
etmy
deci
sionf
orkeepi
ngMi
raawayf
rom
hi
m.Iknowt
hatIwaswr
ongf
or
sl
eepi
ngwi
thhi
m buthewassupposed
t
otaker
esponsi
bil
i
tyIdi
dn’
tfor
ce
my
sel
fint
ohi
m.Hewant
edt
ofuckme
asmuchasIwant
edt
ofuckhi
m.I
t’
s
f
unnyhowt
hiswhol
esi
tuat
iont
urned
out
.Iwast
heonewhowasbl
amedand
shamedbuti
ttakest
wot
otango.Bei
ng
awomani
shar
dyoual
way
staket
he
bl
ameev
enf
orgr
ownassmen.
Igeti
nmycaranddr
ivehome.I
’
m
wel
comedmyMi
ra’
sgi
ggl
es.Theyar
e
t
oocoz
yformyl
i
king.
“
Soxakasahl
eki
mtanami
ngat
hi
umt
hint
angaphambi
l
i”(
Soxmychi
l
dis
gi
ggl
i
ngl
i
key
ouar
etouchi
ngherpr
ivat
e
par
t)Hel
ooksatmewi
thnoemot
ionat
al
l
“
Ishoul
dgetgoi
ngnow”Heget
sup
“
ByeMal
ume”
“
Sur
emt
wana”Heki
ssesherf
orehead
andheadoutandIf
oll
owhi
m
“
Youar
enotgoi
ngt
osaygoodby
eto
me”Het
urnsar
oundandl
ooksatme
“
Ihopey
ouar
ehappy
”
“
Excusesme?
”
“
Youar
ehappyt
hatbast
ardbr
okeher
hear
t”
“
Shet
oldy
ou,
Isee”
“
Yesshet
oldmeev
ery
thi
ng.Howcan
y
ousayst
upi
dbl
i
ndgi
rlt
oher
?Whosay
suchwor
dst
oherdaught
er?Youbr
oke
herMr
sKmor
ethanLwandl
elwenkosi
di
dandy
ouknowv
erywel
lthatshehas
l
owsel
f-
est
eem andy
ouj
usthadt
oadd
sal
tont
hat
.Whycan’
tyouseet
hatshe
wast
ryi
ngt
ohel
pyou?Yesy
out
oldher
t
ost
opi
nter
fer
ingbutnochi
l
dwantt
o
wat
cht
hei
rpar
entbei
ngabusedanddo
not
hingabouti
t.I
ftabl
eswer
etur
ned
y
ouwoul
dhav
edonet
hesamet
hing”
“
Heyhey
,Soxwhoar
eyout
oint
erf
erei
n
myhousehol
daf
fai
rs!
”
“
I’
mtheguywhoi
ssoi
nlov
ewi
thy
our
daught
erbutbecauseI
’
m poory
oudon’
t
t
hinkIdeser
veher
.”Ichuckl
e
“
Sot
hiswhati
t’
sabouthuh?Youar
etoo
damnol
dformydaught
erMpendul
o
andv
eley
ouhav
enot
hingt
oof
ferher
y
ouar
ejustadr
iver
.Shedeser
ves
bet
ter
”Ial
way
sknewt
hathel
ovesher
andImadesur
ethathest
ayonhi
slane
whi
chi
sbei
ng“
mal
ume”not
hingmor
e.
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
iswhaty
oucal
l
bet
ter
?”
“
Wel
ldespi
teofwhathedi
dyeshe’
sten
t
imesbet
tert
hany
ou.He’
sMi
ra’
sage,
comi
ngf
rom awel
ldof
ami
l
yandhegot
l
essr
esponsi
bil
i
tyt
hany
ou.Wenay
ou
hav
edoz
ensofbabymot
her
syouhav
e
t
otakecar
eofwi
tht
hel
i
ttl
ethaty
ougot
.
Howwoul
dyout
akecar
eofmy
daught
er?
”
“
Howmanyt
imesdoIhav
etot
ell
you
t
hatt
heyar
enotmybabymamasbut
myl
atebr
other
’s?Ican’
tnegl
ectmy
br
other
’ski
ds,
I’
mthei
rfat
heraswel
l
”
“
Ohwel
lgoodf
ory
ouboybuty
ouar
e
notamanofmydaught
er’
scal
i
bre”
“
She’
snotagol
ddi
ggerl
i
key
ou.MrK
wi
l
lst
il
lbeatshi
toutofy
ounx
!”He
wal
ksoutl
eav
ingmef
umi
ngwi
thanger
whohet
hinkshei
snx
!Iwal
ktot
he
l
i
vingr
oom butMi
rai
snott
her
esoI
wal
ktoherbedr
oom andIf
indher
sl
eepi
ng.Isi
tonherbedandcar
essher
beaut
if
ulf
ace.
“
All
Iev
erdi
dwasf
ory
oumybabyI
’
m
sor
ryt
hatsomehowi
taf
fect
edy
oubut
knowt
hatmommyl
ovesy
ousomuch”I
ki
ssherl
i
ps.

Icoul
dn’
twai
ttogetoutoft
hehospi
tal
sot
hatIcangoandseemyDol
l
face.I
di
dn’
tcal
lhert
hewhol
eweekbecauseI
want
edt
otal
ktoherf
acet
oface.Iwant
t
oapol
ogi
zehowsor
ryIam andhow
muchIhav
efal
l
eni
nlov
ewi
thher
.I’
m
notgoi
ngt
ogi
veuponher
.Il
oveher
,
damnIl
ovesomuchherandIwi
l
lnev
er
beabl
etol
i
vewi
thouther
.If
eel
so
hor
ri
blet
hatIbr
okeherhear
tbutIdon’
t
r
egr
ethel
pingmal
umebecauseI
woul
dn’
thav
emether
.Hel
pingmal
ume
scor
edmel
oveandI
’
m notgoi
ngt
olet
i
tgoj
ustl
i
ket
hat
.I’
m goi
ngt
ofi
ghtf
or
herandshowherhowmuchshemeans
t
ome.Iwonderwhot
oldherand
whoev
ert
hati
sI’
m goi
ngt
ofuckhi
m up
sobad!ThanksGodt
hatIdi
dn’
tdi
eI
don’
tthi
nkIwoul
dhav
eRestI
nPeace
wi
thoutf
ixi
ngt
hingsbet
weenmy
Dol
l
faceandI
.Mymom wi
thmydoct
or
wal
kinj
ustwhenIj
ustf
ini
shedpacki
ng.
“
Someonecan’
twai
ttogetoutofher
e”
Thedoct
orsay
s.
“
Ihav
ebeenher
efort
hewhol
eweek
doct
orI
’
m homesi
ck”Hegi
ggl
es
“
Iunder
stand”Theywal
ktowar
dsand
t
heey
emom i
sgi
vi
ngmei
sfr
eaki
ngme
out
.Shewasokaymi
nut
esagoandnow
she’
swear
ingt
hisscar
ylookofher
s.
Tr
ustmewhenmom i
sli
ket
hisi
t’
s
aboutt
ogodown.
“
Iknowt
haty
ouwi
l
lmakesur
eheget
s
enoughr
estZoks”
“
Ofcour
seCel
ethanky
ousomuch”
“
Any
timeZoks,
any
time”Hegi
vesmy
mom ahugesmi
l
ewhi
channoy
sthe
shi
toutofmet
henhewal
ksout
.
“
Zoksneh?
”
“
Yini
”(what
?)
“
Hewanty
ouandwhyar
eyoual
l
owi
ng
hi
mtogi
vey
oupetnames.Zoks
wamasi
mba”
“
Shutt
hef
uckupLwandl
elwenkosi
!I’
m
soangr
yaty
our
ightnowandI
’
m af
rai
d
whatImi
ghtdot
oyousoj
ustt
hef
uck
upboy
!!
!”Ohsheknows!Shegr
absmy
bagandwewal
kout
,sheget
smy
medi
cat
ionpr
escr
ipt
ionf
ir
standsi
gns
meoutt
henwel
eav
e.Thedr
ivei
s
awkwar
dandsi
l
ence.
“
Uyangi
nyany
isaLwandl
elwenkosi
,I
don’
trecogni
zey
ouany
mor
e.Who
t
aughty
out
opl
aywi
thpeopl
e’
shear
t
f
orr
evengehuh?
”
“
I’
m sor
ryMamaI
…”
“
Sor
ry?Sor
rywi
l
lfi
xMi
ra’
sbr
okenhear
t?
Youmadeherf
all
inl
ovewi
thy
ou
Lwandl
elwenkosi
,youi
ntr
oducedhert
o
usandwef
ell
inl
ovewi
thheraswel
l
t
heny
out
ookheri
nnocencekanty
ou
wer
ejustpl
ayi
ngt
hepoorgi
rl
.Youar
e
socr
uel
!”Iunder
standwhymymom i
s
f
umi
ngl
i
ket
hisshehasf
all
eni
nlov
e
wi
thMi
rabutwhowoul
dn’
tfal
li
nlov
e
wi
thher
,she’
ssuchabeaut
if
ulsoul
.
“
I’
m sor
rymom IknowImessedup…”
“
Messedup?Yougot
tabeki
ddi
ngme.
Messedupdoesn’
tbegi
ntodescr
ibe
whaty
oudi
d!Youar
esoev
il
!Shel
oves
y
ousomuchwi
thy
ourbaggageandshe
al
mostgotr
apedbecauseofy
ouand
t
hisi
swhatsheget
s!Uy
inj
a
Lwandl
elwenkosi
Nkosi
!Nj
anj
enj
i
uy
inj
a!!
”Ibl
i
nkmyt
ear
sbackbutt
hey
f
all
eff
ort
lessl
y.Herwor
dscutdeepi
nto
myhear
t.
Shedr
opsmeof
fathomeanddr
ivest
o
myuncl
e’
shouse.Ther
e’snooneher
eI
wonderwher
eNandi
is.It
akemydad’
s
RangeRov
erkey
ssi
ncemycari
satt
he
penal
beat
ers.Idr
ivet
omyDol
l
face’
s
house.Thegat
eisopensoi
sthedoorI
knocksev
eral
timesbutnoonei
s
at
tendi
ngme.Imakemywayi
nandI
canhearmoansasIgetcl
osert
oher
r
oom.Not
hingpr
epar
edmef
orwhatI
seewhenIopent
hedoor
.Soxi
sfucki
ng
myDol
l
facel
i
ket
hewor
ldi
sendi
ngand
she’
sscr
eami
ngherpl
easur
etot
all
y
enj
oyi
ngher
sel
f.
“
Do.
..
Dol
l
face”Myv
oicei
sbar
elyaudi
ble
andmyhear
tispoundi
nghar
dagai
nst
mychest
.
“
Ufunani
wenal
a!”(
Whatar
eyoudoi
ng
her
e?)
“
I’
m sor
ryt
oint
err
upt
”Imakemyway
out
,mywhol
ebodyi
str
embl
i
ngandmy
chestf
eel
sli
kei
t’
scl
osi
ngi
n.Igeti
nmy
caranddr
iveof
f,t
hepi
ctur
eoft
hem
keepsf
lashi
ngacr
ossmyey
esandIf
eel
myhear
tshat
ter
ingi
ntopi
eces.How
coul
dshemov
eonsof
ast
?IknowIhur
t
herbutIl
oveherandInev
erex
pect
ed
t
hatshewoul
dmov
eonsof
ast
.Di
dI
meannot
hingt
ohert
hatmuch?Ohmy
dearl
ordcoul
ditbeadr
eam pl
ease.A
sol
emnt
earescapesmyey
eIwi
pei
t
wi
tht
hebackofmyf
oref
inger
.Iknew
t
hatbast
ardwant
edherar
ghhecoul
dn’
t
wai
ttohav
eherf
uck!
!Igr
oanasgr
ip
har
dont
hest
eer
ingwheel
.Iwashopi
ng
t
hatwewi
l
lfi
xthi
ngsandIwi
l
lshowher
howmuchIl
ovebutshemov
edonand
i
t’
shur
ts.Ipar
kmydad’
scaront
he
ot
hersi
deandcr
yli
keabi
tch.IguessI
deser
vedt
hatbuti
t’
sdoesn’
tmakei
t
hur
tanyl
ess.OnceI
’
m donewi
thcr
ying
whi
chdi
dn’
thel
patal
lbecausemyhear
t
i
sst
il
lbl
eedi
ng.Idr
ivet
oBr
aXhouse.
“
Lwandl
e”
“
HeyBr
aX”Webumpf
ist
s
“
Comet
hissi
de”Wewal
ktot
hel
i
ving
r
oom andImakemy
sel
fcomf
ort
abl
eon
t
hecouch
“
Youl
ookl
i
keamessman”
“
Ineedmyf
ixbutIdi
dn’
tbr
ingany
moneywi
thme”
“
Don’
twor
ryboysi
sonke.Iwi
l
lgogeti
t”
“
Iwantsomet
hingst
rongt
oday
”He
l
ooksatmewi
thar
aisedbr
ow
“
Whi
tesugar
?”
“
Yes”Hesi
ghs
“
NoIcan’
tgi
vey
out
hat
”
“
Justf
ort
odaypl
easeBr
aX”
“
Whathappenedkant
iboy
?Thel
ast
t
imey
ouwer
eli
ket
hiswasl
asty
ear
wheny
oul
osty
ourbr
other
”
“
Wel
ll
etmesayIl
ostt
hel
oveofmyl
i
fe
t
hist
ime”
“
Cher
ri
eyakhoi
bhodi
l
e?”(
Yourgi
rl
fr
iend
i
sdead)
“
NoIbr
okeherhear
tandshemov
edon
sof
astandqui
ckl
y.Pl
easej
ustgi
veme
t
hewhi
tesugarIwi
l
ldoubl
epay
”
“
HadeboybutIwi
l
lgi
vey
ouj
ustf
or
t
odayIdon’
twanty
out
ouset
hesest
uff
nt
wanay
ami
theywi
l
ldest
royy
ou”He
di
sappear
sandcomesbackwi
tha
cocai
newi
thoutawast
eoft
imeIt
ake3
l
i
nesr
espect
ivel
yandIf
eel
mysel
f
dr
if
ti
ngf
arawayf
rom t
her
eal
i
ty.

I
t’
sbeenabusyweekbutIf
inal
l
yseal
ed
t
hedeal
.I’
mlooki
ngf
orwar
dtobe
wor
kingwi
thMrZondo.He’
sawel
l
-
r
espect
edbusi
nessman.Wor
kingwi
th
hi
m wi
l
lbegoodf
ormycompany
.I’
m on
mywayhomenowandImi
ssmywi
fe
anddaught
ersomuch.Ist
artatt
hemal
l
j
ustt
obuysomet
hingf
orbot
hoft
hem
t
hendr
iveof
f.Myphoner
ingsi
t’
s
connect
edt
otheBl
uet
oot
h.
“
Khany
i”
“
Khumal
o”Shebur
sti
ntot
ear
s
“
Heywhat
’swr
ong,
tal
ktome”Shesay
s
i
ncoher
entt
hingsasshechokeson
t
ear
s.
“
Ineedy
ou”Shemanaget
out
tert
hose
3wor
dst
hroughhermuf
fl
edsobs.
“
I’
m onmywaynowj
ustgi
vemet
wot
o
t
hreehour
sokay
?”
“
Okay
”Ther
e’ssomet
hingaboutt
his
womant
hatmakesi
thar
dformet
ost
ay
awayf
rom her
.Themor
eIt
ryt
ost
ay
away
,it
’st
hemor
eI’
m dr
awnt
oher
.
She’
shast
hisi
rr
esi
sti
blef
ir
eman.I
pr
esst
heaccel
erat
orhar
dandl
i
stent
o
t
hemusi
ctodi
sruptmymi
ndf
rom
t
hinki
ngbuti
tdoesany
way
.Iknowwhat
I
’
m doi
ngi
stot
all
ywr
ongandshoul
dmy
wi
fef
indout
,shewi
l
lbesobr
oken.Less
t
han3hour
sI’
mri
ghtonherdoor
.The
momentsheopenst
hedoorshet
hrows
her
sel
finmyar
ms
“
It
’sokaymyher
enow,
I’
m her
e”Iscoop
herupandwewal
ktoherl
i
vingr
oom.I
gent
lyputheront
hecouchandhol
dher
i
nmyar
ms
“
Tal
ktomeKhany
i”
“
Yourwi
feknowsaboutus”Ichokeon
mysal
i
va
“
Shecamet
oseemei
nmyof
fi
ceand
t
oldmet
ogetawayf
rom y
ouot
her
wise
shewi
l
lki
l
lme!
”
“
Bongawi
l
lnev
erkeept
hisf
rom mei
f
sheknewshewoul
dhav
esai
dit
”
“
Youar
esay
ingI
’
mly
ing?
”
“
Noofcour
senot
,I’
mtr
yingt
o
under
standwhaty
ouar
esay
ing”Iknow
mywi
feshewoul
dhav
econf
ront
edme.
“
I’
m scar
edKhumal
oandI
’
m scar
edf
or
mybaby
”
“
Yourbaby
”
“
YesI
’
m pr
egnantwi
thy
ourchi
l
d”Ipul
l
herbackandl
ookather
“
Youar
eser
ious?
”Shenodswi
thher
head.Ohshi
tthi
sismessedup!I
fI
r
ememberwehav
enev
erusepr
otect
ion.
FuckKhumal
ohowcoul
dyoubeso
st
upi
d!Thi
swi
l
lbr
eakBonga
“
OhGodmywi
fe.
.she…”shecut
smeof
f
“
SheknowsKhumal
oshe’
spr
etendi
ng
t
oyoubecauseshe’
sandherdaught
er
ar
epl
anni
ngt
otakey
oudown.Theyar
e
wor
kingwi
thZol
eka’
sbr
other
.They
wantt
obr
ingy
oudownKhumz
”I
chuckl
e
“
Woahwoahwhatar
eyouonabout
now”
“
Yourwi
feanddaught
erar
ewor
king
wi
tht
heNkosi
’
stobr
ingy
oudown.They
hav
eav
ideoofy
ouki
l
li
ngt
hatboyt
hat
al
mostr
apedy
ourdaught
er.Theywant
t
oci
rcul
atei
tsot
hatt
heboy
’s
communi
tywi
l
ldeal
wit
hyou
accor
dingl
y.Appar
ent
lyhewasl
ovedby
hi
scommuni
ty.Theywanty
out
odi
e
Khumal
oandt
akeal
lyourwor
th.Your
wi
fesai
dither
sel
ftomet
odayt
hat
she’
sti
redofy
ourabusi
vesel
fandI
mustenj
oyy
ounowbecausei
t’
swon’
t
l
ast
”Il
augh
“
Bongawoul
dnev
erdot
hatt
ome
sweet
hear
tasf
orMi
raahshesuchan
i
nnocentbabygi
rl
.YesIhav
ecaused
t
hem somuchpai
nbutt
heycansee
t
hatI
’
m changi
ng”
“
Theyar
epl
ayi
ngy
oual
loft
hem.I
swear
!”Idon’
tbel
i
eveher
“
Howdoy
ouknowal
loft
his?
”
“
Comel
etmeshowy
ou”Wegetupand
wewal
ktosomer
oom.I
t’
sdar
kand
empt
y,myey
esdar
ttot
hemanchai
ned
ont
hechai
r.I
’
m shocked
“
Whati
sthi
sKhany
i!
”
“
Hecamet
omeandof
fer
edt
opaymea
mi
l
li
oni
fIt
ell
him aboutev
ery
thi
ngt
hat
wear
edi
scussi
ngbutIr
efused.Het
ri
ed
t
ofor
cehi
msel
fonmeandIhi
thi
m wi
th
av
asehecol
l
apsed.Idr
aggedhi
m her
e
andt
ir
edhi
m up”Thi
sisget
ti
ngser
ious
now.Il
ookatt
hismanandhel
ooks
f
ami
l
iar
.
“
Ithi
nkIhav
eseenhi
m bef
orer
emov
e
t
hegag”Shewal
kst
ohi
m andr
emov
es
t
hegag
“
Ihav
eseeny
oubef
orewhoar
eyou”
“
I’
mthef
atherofy
ourex
-wi
fe’
s
daught
er”NowIr
emember
,Ioncesaw
hi
minmyhouseandBr
endacl
aimed
he’
sacousi
nandIbel
i
evedher
.
“
Thecousi
nIsee,
whatdoy
ouwant
f
rom me”
“
Iknowy
ouki
l
ledBr
endamydaught
er
needscl
osur
e”Il
augh
“
Youcan’
tbeser
ious”
“
Wel
lIam”
“
Tel
lhi
m ev
ery
thi
ng”Khany
isay
s.He
l
ooksatKhany
ithemeandst
art
s
t
alki
ng
“
Ihat
eyouVusi
muz
i!Youki
l
ledt
he
mot
herofmychi
l
dandmydaught
er
hav
enev
erbeent
hesameev
ersi
ncet
he
di
sappear
anceofhermot
her
.Ihav
e
beenwor
kingonav
engi
ngBr
endasi
nce
t
hedayIf
oundouty
ouki
l
ledher
.Iknow
t
haty
ouhav
ebeenabusi
ngy
ourwi
feI
hav
ebeenkeepi
ngt
absony
ouandMi
ra
conf
ir
medev
ery
thi
ngwhenshet
oldmy
nephewLwandl
elwenkosi
ever
ythi
ng.
I
t’
stur
nsoutt
haty
ourwi
fei
sfedup
wi
thy
ourabusi
vebehav
ior
,sheasked
Zol
ekat
ohel
pherandmysi
sterasked
met
ohel
pthem.Wehav
ebeenpl
ott
ing
apl
ant
obr
ingy
oudown.Imanaget
o
hacki
ntoy
ourol
dhousecamer
asand
sawy
ouki
l
li
ngI
nnocent
.Whatbaf
fl
es
mest
il
ltodayi
sthatwhyar
eyoukeep
camer
asi
nthathousebecausey
ouuse
i
ttof
ory
ourdi
rt
yev
ildeeds!That
’st
he
samehousey
oubur
iedBr
endaandt
he
samehousey
oubr
utal
l
yki
l
ledt
hatman
whowasmaki
ngamov
eony
ourwi
fe”I
can’
tbel
i
eveBongaandMi
raaf
ter
ev
ery
thi
ngIhav
edonef
ort
hem i
sthi
s
howt
heyt
hankme?I
’
m shaki
ngwi
th
angerandIf
eel
li
keI
’
m goi
ngt
obur
st.
Theywantt
ouset
hev
ideoofmeki
l
li
ng
f
orMi
ra?Ungr
atef
ulmuch!Inev
er
meantt
oki
l
lthatboyhewassoweak,
hedi
edwi
thf
ewpunches.Iwant
edt
o
t
eachhi
m al
esson.DamnIdi
dn’
tknow
put
ti
ngcamer
asi
nthathouset
omake
sur
ethatwhoev
erI
’
m keepi
ngt
her
e
doesn’
tescapei
ssuchabadi
dea.
“
Keephi
m her
eI’
m comi
ngback!
”Iwal
k
outanddr
ivehome.Howdi
dInotsee
t
hiscomi
ng!
“
Bonga!
!!Mi
ra!
!!
!”Iscr
eam t
hemomentI
makemywayi
n.
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayI
nnocent
ia
Hl
oni
phi
l
eMabuz
a

CHAPTER27

“
I’
m comi
ng!
!”IshoutasImakemyway
t
othedoor
.Iopent
hedoorandI
’
m
wel
comedbyahugesl
ap,
myv
isi
on
st
uddedwi
thst
ars.
“
Whatt
hef
uckZo!
”Shepushesherway
i
nandl
ooksatme,
she’
sbur
ningwi
th
anger
.
“
Howdar
eyouusemysont
opl
oty
our
v
endet
ta!
!?
”Sheat
tempt
stosl
apme
agai
nbutIhol
dherhands.WhenZoi
s
angr
y,sheget
scr
azyl
i
ket
hisandbei
ng
y
oungert
hanheri
snothel
pingbecause
sheal
way
sremi
ndsmet
hat
.“Youar
e
mybabybr
othersowheny
oumessupI
wi
l
lfuckupZani
!”
“
Youneedt
ocal
m down”
“
Cal
m downmyf
oot
!Howcany
oudo
t
hishuh!Youpl
ayedwi
thpeopl
e’
sli
ves!
Idon’
tknowany
thi
ngaboutKhumal
o
butf
rom whatI
’
vehear
dfr
om Bonga,
he’
sacr
uel
manKhuz
ani
!Pr
ovoki
nghi
m
i
sli
kepoki
ngasnakeati
tshol
e.Whati
f
hef
indsout
,ohhewi
l
lki
l
lyouand
Lwandl
elwenkosi
!!
”Sheshr
iekswi
th
anger
“
Youneedt
ocal
m downsi
swami
”
“
Don’
ttel
lmet
ocal
m downKhuz
ani
,
y
our
iskedy
ourl
i
feaswel
lasmysonsI
can’
tcal
m down!YouknowwhatIhat
e
t
hemosti
sthaty
ouusedMi
ra!You
usedani
nnocentv
ulner
abl
egi
rlf
ory
our
v
endet
ta.That
’smakemesi
ck!What
ki
ndofamanar
eyout
hatuseki
dst
o
f
ighthi
sbat
tl
es.Uy
angi
nyany
isa
Khuz
ani
.”Icl
enchmyj
awsshe’
smaki
ng
meangr
ynowbutIwi
l
lkeepcal
m
becauseshe’
smyol
dersi
sterandI
r
especther
.
“
Sis….
”shedoesn’
tletmet
otal
k
“
Idon’
tunder
standwhyy
ouwantt
o
av
engeBr
endat
hatwomannev
er
deser
vedy
ou!Leti
tgoKhuz
anibef
ore
y
oul
osey
ourl
i
fef
orabi
tcht
hatdi
dn’
t
deser
vey
ourl
i
fe!Iunder
standy
oul
oved
herbutshenev
erl
ovedy
ou!
”
“
Yout
hinkI
’
m doi
ngt
hisf
orBr
enda?No
Idon’
tcar
eaboutherhowev
ershe
deser
vesj
ust
ice!I
’
m doi
ngt
hisf
or
Emi
hle!Ev
erysi
ngl
edaymydaught
eri
s
dr
if
ti
ngawayf
rom mebecauseshe
wanthermot
her
!”
“
Butst
il
lKhuz
ani
,thatwon’
tbr
ingher
back!
”
“
Yest
hatwon’
tbutatl
easti
fKhumal
o
canbeoutoft
heway
,Icanf
indawayt
o
di
gBr
endaandbur
yherwher
emy
daught
erwi
l
lbeabl
etov
isi
ther
whenev
ershemi
ssesher
.Emi
hleneeds
cl
osur
eZo.Thi
sisaf
fect
inghermor
e
t
hanIt
houghti
tdi
d.Hercl
asst
eacher
oncecal
l
edmeandt
oldmet
hatshe’
s
notdoi
ngwel
latschool
.Ther
ear
eti
mes
shej
ustdr
if
tfarawaydur
ingal
esson.
Shebl
amesherf
orhermom’
s
di
sappear
anceshet
hinkshedi
d
somet
hingt
ohert
hatmadeher
di
sappearonher
.Shef
eel
sli
keshe’
sa
badchi
l
dhencehermom l
efther
,that
’s
hur
tdeepdowni
nmyhear
tZo.Ij
ust
wantmydaught
ert
obehappyl
i
keot
her
ki
dsi
t’
sthatt
oomucht
oask”
“
OhZani
”Theangerv
ani
shesonher
f
aceandi
t’
snowr
epl
acedwi
thpi
tyand
hur
t.Shepul
l
smei
nherar
msandhol
ds
herf
ordearl
i
fe.Wepul
lapar
tforawhi
l
e
shet
akesmyhandandl
eadsmet
othe
couch.
“
I’
mreal
l
ysor
ry,
Ican’
tbegi
ntoi
magi
ne
howy
ouar
efeel
i
ngandIf
ull
y
under
standbutt
hiswayi
sdanger
ous
but
i.I
’
m sur
eyoudon’
twantEmi
hlet
o
l
oseanot
herpar
ent
.Howdoy
out
hink
shewi
l
lfeel
ifshel
oseherf
ather
becausehewast
ryi
ngt
oav
engeher
mot
hersot
hatshecangetcl
osur
e.
Pl
easet
hinkabouti
tThabz
olo”Ishake
myhead
“
I’
m beggi
ngy
ou,
Ican’
tlosey
ou,
and
y
ouar
etheonl
ythi
ngt
hatIhav
elef
t
t
hatr
emi
ndsmeofmyf
ather
,myonl
y
br
other
.Ican’
tlosey
ouZani
pleaseI
j
ustbur
iedmysonl
asty
ear
,Ican’
tbur
y
anot
hersonandmybr
other
”
“
WhatdoIdor
egar
dingEmi
hle”She
si
ghsandt
akesmyhandsi
ntoher
s
“
Emi
hlei
sst
il
lyoung,
shej
ustneeds
l
oveandcar
e.Youwi
l
lsee,
shewi
l
lget
ov
erhermom’
sdi
sappear
anceorbet
ter
y
etf
indheramot
herf
igur
eandst
op
f
ucki
ngar
ound.
”Ichuckl
e,Iknowonce
west
artt
hisconv
ersat
ionshewon’
t
st
op.Godshe’
sli
kemymot
her
.Theyar
e
al
way
snaggi
ngaboutmeset
tl
ingdown.
“
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ngsi
s,y
oucango
nowandhav
esomer
est
”
“
Iseewhaty
ouar
edoi
ngbutona
ser
iousnot
eZani
youar
enotget
ti
ng
anyy
oungery
out
urni
ng39t
hisy
eary
ou
wantt
odi
easabachel
or?
”
“
Hay
iZol
ekaawumet
u”
“
NoKhuz
ani
Emi
hleneedsamot
her
f
igur
eandal
loft
hiswi
l
lbesol
ved.
”
“
Shehasy
ou,
mom andKhany
i”
“
Yesbuti
t’
snott
hesameKhuz
ani
.You
needt
oset
tl
edownnow.Who’
sgoi
ngt
o
gr
owourdad’
ssur
namekant
i?Ar
eyou
t
ell
i
ngmet
hati
t’
sov
ernj
ewi
tht
he
Msi
mangocl
an.Hay
imusauganga
wena”
’
“
Letmewal
kyouout
”Shegi
ggl
es
“
Youar
ethr
owi
ngmeoutnow?
”
“
Youar
etal
ki
ngt
oomuchnow”She
punchesmyshoul
derIgi
ggl
e.
“
LookIseet
haty
ouar
escar
edbuty
ou
hav
etoknowt
hatnotev
ery
onei
sli
ke
Br
enda”sher
oll
sherey
es,
shenev
er
l
i
kedBr
endawel
lIunder
stand.Shewas
t
oomucht
ookeepupwi
th.Whenwe
metIwasst
il
ltr
yingt
omakesomet
hing
outofmy
sel
f.Ihav
eal
way
sbeen
f
asci
nat
edaboutcomput
ersand
t
echnol
ogy
.Ir
emembert
hisot
herdaya
f
ri
endofmi
nehadpr
obl
em wi
thhi
s
comput
erandIsol
vedt
hepr
obl
em
wi
thoutanyhassl
e.Hewashappyand
whenev
ert
her
ewassomeonewho
neededhel
pher
ecommendedmet
o
t
hem.I
t’
sst
art
edof
fasf
ixi
ngot
her
peopl
e’
scomput
ersandl
apt
opsunt
il
sol
vi
ngt
echni
cal
issuesbecamemy
passi
on.Ideci
dedt
ost
udycomput
er
sci
ence.Get
ti
ngaj
obwasnost
ruggl
e
af
terIcompl
etedmydegr
eebecause
t
her
e’shi
ghdemandi
nsof
twar
e
engi
neer
ing.Thepl
anwast
ohav
emy
owncompanyonedayandi
ttookme
f
ewy
ear
stost
artupmyownappdesi
gn
andmobi
l
eappDev
elopmentCompany
.
“
Thanksf
ort
hel
ect
uresi
sIheary
ou”
“
Idon’
twanty
out
ohearmeIwanty
ou
t
odosomet
hing”
“
OkayIwi
l
l”I
t’
stheonl
ywayt
odr
opt
his
t
opi
c
“
Thi
nkaboutwhatIsai
dZani
,rev
enge
canbackf
ir
e.Pl
easest
opt
hisandIhope
Khumal
owon’
tfi
ndoutaboutt
his”
“
Howi
sLwandl
e”
“
Hewasdi
schar
gedt
oday
”
“
Thatgr
eatIhopehecansol
vet
hings
wi
thMi
ra.Ihav
enev
erseenhi
mli
ket
his
wi
thagi
rl
.Her
eal
l
ylov
esMi
ra”
“
IfIwasMi
raIwoul
dn’
tfor
giv
ehi
m.”I
wi
nce
“
AwZo”
“
Whaty
ouguy
sdi
discr
uel
!”
“
‘Mi
naIdi
dn’
tsayhemustmakeherhi
s
gi
rl
fr
iend.Theywer
esupposedt
obe
f
ri
ends”
“
Andt
hatmakei
tbet
ter
?”
“
Notr
eal
l
ybutatl
eastMi
rawoul
dn’
tbe
t
hishehear
tbr
oken.I
nvest
ingal
lyour
f
eel
i
ngsandgi
vi
ngal
lyour
sel
fto
someonei
ncl
udi
ngy
oursoul
onl
ytof
ind
outi
twasal
lfakehur
tsmor
e”
“
Ifeel
sor
ryf
orhersher
eal
l
ylov
es
Lwandl
ear
ghni
yangci
kani
nanow2”
Sheget
sup
“
I’
m sor
ryokay
”
“
Iwi
shy
oursor
rycanmendMi
ra’
shear
t
buti
twon’
t”
“
I’
m sor
rysi
sIwi
l
lfi
xthi
sIpr
omi
se”
“
What
ever
”Shemakesherwayout
.I
hat
eitwhenmysi
steri
smadatme.We
hav
eagoodbonddespi
tet
hef
actmy
mom doesn’
tli
keherbutIwi
l
lnev
er
negl
ectmyonl
ysi
ster
.Justasmuchas
I
’
mtheonl
ythi
ngt
hatr
emi
ndsherof
dad,
she’
sal
sot
heonl
ythi
ngt
hat
connect
smewi
thourf
ather
.
Iknowusi
ngLwandl
eandMi
rawasso
l
owofmebutIdi
dn’
thav
eanyot
her
choi
ceandIcan’
tbackdownnow.I
t’
s
onl
ymat
teroft
imeKhumal
ogodown.I
j
ustneedt
ospr
eadt
hisv
ideot
othe
r
ightpeopl
eatt
her
ightt
ime.Ispend
al
mostmywhol
edaywor
kingonanew
app,
acal
li
nter
ruptme.
“
Khany
i”
”
Hel
l
ohowar
eyou”
“
I’
m goodandy
our
sel
f?”
“
I’
m notf
eel
i
nggood”
“
What
’swr
ong?
”
“
Idon’
tknowmyhear
tissor
e”
“
I’
m comi
ngokay
”Wi
thoutawast
eof
t
imeI
’
m onmywayt
oKhany
i’
spl
ace.
Khany
iisl
i
keal
i
ttl
esi
stert
ome,
she
wasmyl
atebabysi
ster
’sf
ri
endNol
i
tha.
Theywer
ebestf
ri
endsandNol
i
that
old
met
hatKhany
i’
sst
epdadwasabusi
ng
sex
ual
l
ysi
nceshewas12y
ear
sol
d.I
wassol
i
vidIwant
edt
oki
l
lMf
ani
seni
wi
thmybot
hhandsbutIcoul
dn’
tri
skt
o
got
ojai
l
.Nol
i
thaaskedmom t
oal
l
ow
Khany
itost
aywi
thusandmom agr
eed.
Thathowwebondedasbr
otherand
I
it
tl
esi
ster
.IaskedKhany
itor
epor
t
Mf
ani
seni
butsher
efusedandIt
hought
shewasscar
edonl
ytof
indoutshewas
pl
ott
ingar
evengeonherown.Hehe
Khanyi
sonedanger
ouswomanI
’
m
t
ell
i
ngy
ou.Hepour
edaci
donhi
speni
s
andhel
ostt
heuseofi
t.Nol
i
tha’
sdeat
h
i
sst
il
lamy
ster
ytome,
shecameback
homef
rom school
onedayand
compl
ainedaboutst
omachache,
at
ni
ghtt
hepai
nwor
senedandwet
ookher
t
othehospi
tal
bef
orewegott
her
eshe
wasgone.Iwasbey
ondbr
oken,
my
mom wasamess.I
twashear
tbr
eaki
ng
butwel
ear
nedt
omakepeacewi
thher
deat
h.Iar
ri
veatKhany
i’
spl
aceandgi
ve
herahug.Herey
esar
eredshehav
e
beencr
ying
“
Hey
”
“
Hel
l
o”Shel
eadsmet
oli
vi
ngr
oom
“
Tal
ktome”
“
Ijustmi
ssmypar
ent
s”
“
I’
m sor
ry.
..
comeher
e”Ipul
lhert
omy
ar
msandcomf
orther
.Onceshe’
scal
m
sheof
fer
edsomet
hingf
ormet
odr
ink
andIt
ell
heraj
uicewi
l
lbeokay
.It
ryt
o
makeherf
eel
bet
terandmaki
ngher
l
aughwhi
l
esi
ppi
ngonmyj
uice.Ican
f
eel
mysel
fget
ti
ngweakandmyspeech
i
ssl
urr
ing.
“
Kha.
.kha.
.Whathav
eyoudonet
ome?
”
“
I’
m sor
rySpi
j
oms,
Ineedt
odot
hisf
or
mymom”
“
Whatar
eyout
alki
ngabout
?”
“
Nokubongadeser
vest
odi
eli
keMama”
“
Khany
i.
.Kha“i
t’
sli
ghtout
.Col
dwat
er
spat
ter
ingonmyf
acewakesmeup.I
l
ookatmysur
roundi
ngsandnot
icet
hat
I
’
m chai
nedi
nthi
sempt
yroom.
“
Wakeywakey
!”
“
Whatt
hef
ucki
sthi
sKhany
i!
”
“
Khumal
oisonhi
swaynowIwanty
ou
t
otel
lhi
mthaty
ou,
hiswi
feandMi
ra
wer
ewor
kingt
oget
hert
obr
inghi
m
down!Tel
lhi
m ev
ery
thi
ngbutdon’
t
i
ncl
udeme”Il
aughr
eal
l
yhar
d,Ican’
t
bel
i
evet
his
“
Arey
oumad?
”
“
MadohnoSpi
j
omsI
’
m sane.
”
“
Thenwhyar
eyoudoi
ngt
hiswear
eon
t
hesamet
eam!
”
“
Samet
eam?Nowear
enotont
he
samet
eam Spi
j
omsy
ouwantt
osav
e
Nokubongaandherdaught
erandbr
ing
downKhumal
owhi
l
eIwantt
omake
Nokubongapaysot
ell
mehowar
ewe
ont
hesamet
eam?
”
“
WhatchangedIt
houghtwear
est
il
lon
t
hesamepage.IwantKhumal
oandy
ou
wantBonga.Thathasn’
tchange”
“
Real
l
y?Whataboutt
hepasspor
tshuh?
Youwer
egoi
ngt
ohel
pherr
unaway
Spi
j
oms!
”Isi
gh
”
Youseey
oucan’
tev
endef
endy
our
sel
f!
I
fIknewbet
terI
’
dsayy
ouwant
Nokubonga!Wel
lyoumadeav
erybi
g
mi
stakebyt
urni
ngonourpl
an.
”
“
Younotgoi
ngt
ofor
ceme!
”Shel
aughs
r
eal
l
yhar
dandmakest
hecal
lthenput
s
i
tonl
ouderspeaker
.
“
Daddy
!Hel
p!Pl
ease!Hel
p!”Myhear
t
st
opsbeat
ing.
“
Youbi
tch!I
fyoudar
ehur
tmydaught
er
I
…”
“
Rel
axnoneedf
ort
hreat
swenaj
ustdo
asIt
ell
youandIdon’
tthi
nky
ouwant
l
i
ttl
eEmyt
ojoi
nhermama”
“
Fucky
ouKhay
isi
l
e,Fucky
ou!
”She
cackl
esl
i
keabi
tchshei
sInev
er
t
houghtshecoul
dpl
aymel
i
ket
his.
“
Ist
hishowy
out
hankmeKhany
isi
l
e
af
terev
ery
thi
ngIhav
edonef
ory
ou?We
t
ooky
oui
nandgav
eyoul
i
fe.It
reat
ed
y
oul
i
kemyl
i
ttl
esi
sterandgav
eyoua
f
utur
e,t
odayy
ouar
eapsy
chol
ogi
st
becauseofme!I
sthi
showy
oushow
gr
ati
tudebybet
ray
ingme!Youknowi
fI
wassomeoneel
seIwoul
dhav
etaken
adv
ant
ageofy
oubutnobecauseIsaw
al
i
ttl
esi
steri
nyou!
”
“
ah.
aaahy
ouseet
hat
?That
’showIf
elt
wheny
oubet
ray
edme!Wehadapl
an
buty
ouchoset
opl
ayme!
”
“
Youwi
l
lregr
ett
his,
I’
mtel
l
ingy
ou!
”
“
Lit
tl
eEmy
’sl
i
fedependsony
ouMr
Msi
mango.It
hinkourguesthasar
ri
ved”
Idi
dn’
tseet
hiscomi
ng!Fuck!Igr
oani
n
f
rust
rat
ion.

Mymi
ndhav
ebeenr
eel
i
ngwi
th
t
hought
sandIt
hinkt
hebestwayi
sto
conf
rontKhumal
o.Escapi
ngi
sal
readya
r
iskbutIneedt
obesmar
tabouti
t.I
hav
etot
alkt
ohi
m IhopeSi
yehasn’
t
t
oldhi
m any
thi
ng.I
t’
sar
ound8pm Mi
ra
andIar
eeat
ing
“
Whydi
dyout
ell
Soxdi
dn’
tIt
ell
yout
hat
whathappenedher
est
aysher
e”
“
I’
m sor
ryMamabutIneededsomeone
t
otal
kto”
“
Someonet
otal
ktomyf
oot
!Youkeep
doi
ngex
act
lywhatIt
oldy
ounotwhy
Mi
rahuh?
”
“
I’
m sor
ry”
“
Nyor
yny
oryt
hat
’sal
lyouknow!
”
“
I’
m sor
ry…”
“
Fuseguy
adi
naMi
ra!
”
“
Bonga!
!!Mi
ra!
!”Ihearmyhusband
scr
eami
ngandIj
ustknewt
hathe’
s
angr
ymyhear
tski
psabeat
“
Dini
ngr
oom!
!”Ishoutbackseconds
l
atehemakeshi
swayi
nlooki
ngangr
y.
Ohl
ordwhathappenednow
“
Hel
l
oKhumal
o”
“
Nyel
oKhumal
o,y
ouar
emaki
ngme
y
ourf
ool
!”Ohshi
tshet
oldhi
m
“
Whatar
eyout
alki
ngabout
!”
“
Youwantt
otakemedownBongahuh?
Mehuh?Yourhusbandaf
terev
ery
thi
ngI
hav
edonef
ory
ou!
”I’
mlostf
orasecond
“
Cal
m downandl
et’
stal
kcal
mlyabout
t
his!
”
“
Idon’
twantt
ocal
m down!Iknowt
hat
bot
hofy
ouar
epl
ayi
ngme!
”Hepoi
nts
bot
hofus
“
Iwaspr
otect
ingy
ourdaught
er!I
want
edt
hatboyt
olear
nal
essonand
y
ouwantt
ouset
hatv
ideot
obr
ingme
down!
!”Ohno!
“
Icanex
plai
nKhumal
o,i
t’
snotwhaty
ou
t
hink”Isaycal
mlybutI
’
m shaki
ngwi
th
f
ear
.Ihav
enev
erseenhi
mthi
sangr
y
“
Youwantt
oli
etomehuh!
!”Asl
ap
caughtmeof
fguar
dandi
tmakesme
boi
lwi
thanger
“
YesIwantt
obr
ingy
oudowncozI
’
m
t
ir
edofy
ou!I
’
m si
ckandt
ir
edofy
our
empt
ypr
omi
ses!
!Yousai
dyouwi
l
l
changebutl
ookwhaty
ouhav
ejustdi
d!!
Youmademeaf
ool
andmademe
bel
i
evey
ouar
echangi
ngkant
iyouar
e
f
ucki
ngher
!!YesIknowt
haty
ouar
etwo
t
imi
ngmeandI
’
mfedupKhumal
o!I
hav
ebeenwai
ti
ngf
ory
ourchangebut
not
hingi
shappeni
ng!
!I’
mfedup!
Ngi
khat
hel
eukubai
-punchi
ngbagy
akho!
Youar
eaf
ucki
ngcowar
dthatbeatup
women!Cany
oubeamanj
ustonceand
hav
eadecentconv
ersat
ion!Ev
eryt
ime
y
ouhav
etor
aisey
ourf
il
thyhandsatme
andmydaught
er.I
’
mti
redy
ezwa!I
’
m
l
eav
ingy
ouf
orgoodandy
ouwon’
tst
op
met
hist
ime!
”
“
Ungr
atef
ulbi
tch!
!”Hesl
apsmehar
d
andIf
all
wit
hachai
r
“
Mommy
!Dadddypl
easedon’
t,
it’
snot
mom i
twasme.Hi
tmenother
!!
”Cr
ies
Mi
ra,
Hepul
l
smeupbymyhai
r,Iscr
eam i
n
agonyandpunchhi
sbal
l
s.Hegr
oans
andt
hatant
agoni
zeshi
mfur
therhe
punchesmeov
erandov
erunt
ilIf
all
down.Hekeepski
cki
ngmeandki
cki
ng
ov
erandov
er.

If
eel
sohor
ri
blet
hatmom i
sst
il
lnot
t
alki
ngt
ome.Ispendt
hewhol
edayi
n
mybedr
oom.Shecal
l
smef
orsupper
andweeati
nsi
l
enceunt
ilshest
art
s
shout
ingatmeaboutt
ell
i
ngmal
ume
Sox
.Justt
hendadmakeshi
swayi
n
wi
thascr
eam.It
houghthehad
changedbutt
hemomentmymom
st
art
edscr
eami
ngIknewhe’
sbeat
ing
her
.Icanhearhi
m swear
ingatherwhi
l
e
shescr
eamsi
nagony
“
Bit
ch!Igav
eyouev
ery
thi
ngy
ouwant
ed
andt
hishowy
out
hankme!Youwantt
o
ki
l
lme!
”Herscr
eamsofagonypi
erces
t
hroughmyhear
tIcan’
thol
dmyt
ear
s.
“
Daddypl
easeI
’
m beggi
ngy
ou!I
t’
sme
notmom!Shedi
dn’
tknowIswear
!”It
ry
t
oex
plai
ntohi
mthr
oughmysobsbuti
t
doesn’
tseem l
i
kehe’
shear
ingmeorhe
wantt
oli
stent
ome.Ihearal
oudgr
oan
f
rom dadandI
’
m wonder
ingwhat
’s
goi
ngon.If
eel
handst
ouchi
ngmeand
j
umpwi
thf
ri
ght
“
Runbabyandnev
erl
ookback”mom
whi
sper
sonmyear
“
MommynoIcan’
tleav
eyouher
e!”
“
I’
m sor
rymybabyIt
houghtIwi
l
lbe
abl
etohandl
ethi
s.I
’
m sor
ryt
hatIf
ail
ed
y
ou.Run”
“
Runandgowher
emommy
?NoIr
ather
di
ewi
thy
ouher
e”Icr
yhy
ster
ical
l
y
“
Ilov
eyousomuch”Shesqueez
esme
i
nherar
msandki
ssesmyl
i
ps
“
Mommyno!
”
“
It
’sgoi
ngt
obeokaybaby
,Iwi
l
lal
way
s
bewi
thy
ou”Wher
edoessheex
pectme
t
orunt
oIcan’
tev
ensee!
“
Mama”Ihearherscr
eami
ng
“
Comeher
eyoubi
tchy
ouknowhowt
o
f
ightnowhuh!Youwantust
ofi
ght
showmewhaty
ougot
!!
”If
iddl
efor
muf
fi
nandf
indmywayout
.Tear
scan’
t
st
opf
all
i
ngdownmyf
ace.Themoment
I
’
m outt
hegat
eIhearagunshotand
mywhol
ebodyf
reez
e.
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayAz
andeXego,
Noz
iphoNkosi
-Nkony
ane,
Nhl
anhl
aC
Nhl
a&HappyBi
rt
hdayZabanguni
Zah
CHAPTER28

Inev
ert
houghtKhany
iwoul
dev
erst
ab
mei
ntheback.Ihav
ebeennot
hingbut
agr
eatbi
gbr
othert
ohernott
hatshe
owesmef
ort
hatt
hough.Idi
dwhatIdi
d
becausei
twast
her
ightt
hingt
odo.I
hadnor
easont
obemal
i
cioust
owar
ds
her
.Shewasj
ustav
ulner
abl
eyoung
l
adyt
hatneededl
ove,
prot
ect
ion,
car
e
andf
ami
l
y.Ij
ustsawmyl
i
ttl
esi
steri
n
her
.It
’sf
unnyhowIf
eel
sobet
ray
edbut
I
’
mtheonewhowasdi
shonestwi
thher
f
ir
st.Isomehowf
ocusedonmyr
evenge
andf
orgotabouther
s,Iwasegocent
ri
cI
knowandnowmyf
ami
l
y,Bongaand
Mi
raar
eindanger
.FuckI
’
m scr
ewed!I
needapl
anASAPbef
oret
hatbast
ard
ki
l
linnocentsoul
s.
“
Ihav
edonemypar
tIt
oldKhumal
o
ev
ery
thi
ngnowr
eleaseme”
“
Hesai
dImustkeepy
ouher
e”
“
Okayr
eleasemydaught
ert
hen”She
makest
hecal
landt
ell
whoev
erhasmy
daught
ert
osendhert
omymot
her
’s
house
“
Done”
“
Iwantpr
ovey
ouhav
etocal
lthem
whent
heygett
her
e”
“
Nopr
obl
em”
“
Itr
ust
edy
ouKhany
i”
“
Ial
sot
rust
edy
ouSpi
j
oms,
youwer
ea
br
otherInev
erhadbuty
ouchoset
o
pl
aymeandpeopl
ewhopl
ay
Si
yet
hembaKhany
isi
l
eMy
ezapay
”
“
I’
m sor
rybutInev
ermeantt
obet
ray
y
ou”
“
WhySpi
j
oms,
youknow…”Shepauses
andt
ear
sdr
opsdownhergor
geousf
ace
“
Ithoughty
ouar
emybr
otherandIcan
t
rusty
oubutIhav
ecomet
oreal
i
zet
hat
menar
eal
lthesame!Idon’
tknowwhat
y
’al
lseei
nthatbi
tch!Mf
ani
seni
bet
ray
edmamawi
thher
!Youbet
ray
ed
mewi
thher
!!Whatdoesshehav
ethat
nowomanhas?
”Isi
ghandcl
osemy
ey
esmoment
ari
l
ythenl
ooksather
gl
i
steni
ngey
es
“
Khumal
ohasnev
erbeenacheat
,you
ar
etheonl
yonewhomadehi
m
succumbedt
otempt
ati
on.Ihav
ebeen
keepi
ngt
absonhi
mfory
ear
sbutnot
ev
enoncedi
dheev
ercheatonBonga.
Sot
ell
mewhatdoy
ouhav
ethatBonga
doesn’
thav
e?”Shel
ooksatmewi
th
i
ntensi
tyandshr
ugshershoul
der
.
“
Exact
ly”
“
Whati
sthatsupposedt
omean?
”
“
Ineedt
het
oil
et”
“
I’
m notl
ett
ingy
ougo”
“
Ahwel
l
,theny
ouwi
l
lcl
eanaf
terme.
Cal
lmymot
hernow”
”Shecal
l
smy
mot
herandpl
acest
hephoneonmyear
.
“
Hel
l
o”Mymom say
sont
heot
hersi
de
wi
thacr
yingv
oice
“
Mamai
t’
sme”
“
Khuz
ani
!Ihav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
ocal
lyou
whyar
eyounotanswer
ingy
ourphone?
Theyt
ookEmi
hle!She’
sgone”she
scr
eamshy
ster
ical
l
y
“
Cal
m downmamaEmi
hlei
sfi
ne,
they
ar
eont
hewayt
obr
ingher
”
“
Howdoy
ou…Khuz
ani
what
’sgoi
ng
on?
”
“
Iwi
l
lex
plai
nev
ery
thi
ngwhenIcome
t
her
efornowIj
ustneedy
out
ocal
m
down”
“
Cal
m downhowwhenpeopl
etookmy
onl
ygr
andchi
l
d!”Iheart
heknockont
he
ot
hersi
de
“
I’
m sur
eit
’st
hem goopenup”Ihear
someshuf
fl
ingsandal
i
ttl
evoi
ce
scr
eami
ngf
ormama.
“
Gogo!
”
”
Emy
!Ohmybaby
!”
“
Mama”
“
YesBaba”
“
Issheokay
?”
“
Yes”
“
Pleasegi
vehert
hephone”Ther
e’s
someshuf
fl
ingt
henal
i
ttl
evoi
cecomes
t
hrough
“
Hel
l
o”
“
Daddy
’sl
i
ttl
eEmy
”
“
Daddy
!”
“
Didt
heyhur
tyou?
”
“
NobutIwassoscar
ed.Wher
ear
eyou
daddy
?”
“
I’
m happyt
haty
ouar
eokaysweet
hear
t.
Il
ovey
ou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Khany
itakest
hephone
andhangup
“
Arey
ouhappynow?
”
“
NoIneedt
het
oil
et”Shesi
ghs
“
Iwi
l
lgogety
ouabucket
”She
di
sappear
sforf
ewmi
nut
esandcomes
wi
thabucket
.Sheunf
ast
enmeandt
he
momentI
’
mfr
eeIpuncht
hesi
deofher
f
acet
omakeherl
oseher
consci
ousness.Shef
all
sdownont
he
f
loorIpi
ckherupandchai
nheront
he
chai
rli
keshedi
dtomet
henl
ockt
he
dooraf
termaki
ngmywayout
.The
momentIj
umpt
omycarIspeedof
f,t
he
goodt
hingi
sIhav
ebeenkeepi
ngmy
guni
nthecarf
ort
hepastf
ewday
s.I
cal
lmysi
sterandsheanswer
sont
he
3r
dri
ng.
“
Zani
”
“
Heysi
sar
eyoual
lokay
?”
“
Yeswear
eokay
”
”
Incl
udi
ngLwandl
e?Wher
eishe?
”
“
He’
sinhi
sbedr
oom,
he’
sfi
newhat
’s
goi
ngonKhuz
ani
?”
“
It
’sgoody
’al
lokay
,Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
ater
”I
hangupbef
oreshesay
sany
thi
ng.I
knowwhatanagmysi
stercanshebe.I
ar
ri
veatt
heKhumal
ohousehol
d,It
ake
mygunandt
ucki
tin.Thegat
eisopen
soi
sthedoor
.Iknockf
orawhi
l
eandno
oneseemst
oav
ail
themsel
ves.Iwal
k
backt
omycarbutsomet
hingi
nmet
ell
s
met
owal
kinnomat
terhowr
udei
tist
o
j
ustent
eraman’
shouse.Iwal
kinand
makemywayt
othedi
ningr
oom.Isee
bl
oodont
hef
loorandf
oot
pri
ntsst
ainof
bl
ood.Myhear
tski
psabeatIpul
lout
mygunandf
oll
owt
hef
oot
pri
ntsof
bl
oodwhi
char
eleadi
ngt
othest
udy
r
oom.Myhear
tdr
opst
omykneeswhen
IseeKhumal
o’swi
deey
esst
ari
ngr
ight
backatmeashe’
sly
ingonapool
ofhi
s
ownbl
oodwi
thabul
l
ethol
eonhi
s
f
oreheadandnex
ttohi
mther
e’sBonga
whohasbr
uisesandcov
eredwi
thbl
ood
al
lov
erhercl
othes.Shehasagunon
herhand,
Iski
ptoherandwakeherup
whi
chpr
ovest
obei
nvai
n.If
eel
her
pul
sei
t’
sver
yfai
nt,
myhear
tjumpsabi
t
t
hatshe’
sst
il
lal
i
ve.Mi
ra!Wher
e’sMi
ra?
Isear
chf
orheri
nthehousebutIcan’
t
f
indherIcar
ryBongai
nmyar
msand
r
ushhert
othehospi
tal
.Onmyway
t
her
eIcal
lZoandt
ell
herhal
foft
he
si
tuat
ionathand.ThesecondIar
ri
ve
Bongai
sat
tended,
I’
m paci
ngupand
downasIwai
t,t
ryi
ngt
obeposi
ti
vet
hat
Mi
rai
ssaf
ewher
evershei
s.
“
Zani
!”Say
sZot
hemomentshewal
ks
i
n
“
Zo”Shepul
l
smei
nherar
ms.HowdoI
t
ell
hert
his?Wepul
lapar
tandshel
ooks
atme
“
Whathappenedi
sBongaokay
”Isi
gh
andt
akeherhandsi
ntomi
net
henl
ead
hert
othecouch.
“
It
’samesssi
s,ev
ery
thi
ngi
saf
ucki
ng
mess!
”
“
Youar
escar
ingmeZani
”Il
etheri
non
aboutev
ery
thi
ng.
“
OhmyGodKhuz
ani
!”Sheshr
iekswi
th
shock
“
Wher
e’sMi
ra?
”
“
Idon’
tknowmay
bewhenKhumal
o
wentv
iol
entonBongasher
anawayt
o
cal
lhel
p”
“
OhLor
d!Wehav
etof
indherKhuz
ani
!”
Shest
art
scr
ying
“
I’
m sor
ryZopl
easedon’
tcr
y”
“
Thi
sisal
lyourf
aul
tKhuz
ani
!Ifonl
yyou
di
dn’
tpl
ant
oav
engeBr
endanoneof
t
hiswoul
dhav
ehappened!Looknow
Khumal
oisdeadandMi
rai
soutt
her
e
I
’
m sur
eshe’
ssoscar
edand…”she
bur
sti
ntoal
oudsob
“
IknowZo,
Iknowbutonewayort
he
ot
herKhumal
o’ssi
nswoul
dhav
ecat
ch
upwi
thhi
m.I
t’
sapi
tyBongahadt
obe
t
heonet
oki
l
lhi
m andasf
orMi
raIwi
l
l
f
indher
,Ipr
omi
sey
ou”
“
Youshoul
dn’
thav
est
art
edt
his!
”
“
Iwi
l
lgol
ookf
orMi
ra,
Iwi
l
lfi
ndy
ou
her
ewhenIcomeback?
”
“
Yes”shewi
peshert
ear
s
“
Okayt
hanky
ouf
orbei
ngher
e”
“
She’
smyf
ri
endKhuz
ani
,youdon’
tneed
t
othankme”Iki
ssherf
oreheadand
headout
.Ideal
wit
hKhumal
o’ssi
tuat
ion
andwhent
hepol
i
cear
edonewi
th
ev
ery
thi
ng,
Igoandl
ookf
orMi
ra.Bef
ore
Iknowi
t,i
t’
s7o’
cl
ocki
nthemor
ning
andIhav
en’
tfoundMi
ra.I
tdoesn’
thel
p
t
hatshel
eftherphoneIwoul
dhav
euse
i
ttol
ocat
eher
.It
ri
edcal
l
ingher
chauf
feurbutheal
sodoesn’
tknow
wher
eshei
s.Idr
ivet
othehospi
tal
and
f
indZosl
eepi
ng.
“
Zo”Ishakeher
,shebl
i
nksherey
es
openandl
ooksatme
“
Wher
e’sMi
ra?
”
“
Icoul
dn’
tfi
ndherbutt
hepol
i
cear
e
al
sol
ooki
ngf
orherandIwi
l
lfi
ndher
Zo”
“
OhkodaKhuz
ani
wenz
eni
!Whati
fwe
don’
tfi
ndherhuh?Whati
fsher
anaway
whenshewasal
readyi
npai
naf
ter
Khumal
obeatherupandnowshe
passedoutsomewher
e!”
“
Iwi
l
lfi
ndherZo”
“
Stopsay
ingt
hat
,hady
ounotst
art
ed
t
hisnoneoft
hiswoul
dhav
ehappened!
Uy
angi
nyany
isanj
e!”
“
Ithappenedokayandi
t’
sdonenow
st
opshout
ingatmebecausenot
hing
wi
l
lchange!Atl
eastsomet
hingbet
ter
cameoutofal
lthi
s.Khumal
oisdead
whi
chmeansMi
raandBongaar
efr
ee
f
rom hi
m!”
“
Whatwi
l
lhappent
oKhany
i?”
“
Ihav
en’
tdeci
ded”
“
Thatbi
tchaf
terev
ery
thi
ngy
ouhav
e
donef
orher
!”
“
Wel
lIdon’
tbl
ameher
,Idi
dn’
tst
ickt
o
t
hepl
an.Ibet
ray
edher
”
“
Butst
il
lKhuz
ani
andIf
eel
sohor
ri
ble
t
hatwhent
hepoormanr
eal
i
zedwhat
hewasdoi
ngwaswr
onganddeci
dedt
o
seekhel
ponl
ytobepl
ayedbyy
ouguy
s”
“
Ever
ydoghashi
sday
”
“
Youar
esoev
il
!”
“
Whyar
eyouact
ingasi
fKhumal
owas
i
nnocent
?”
“
Ofcour
sehewasnoti
nnocentbutI
can’
thel
pbutwonderhadhef
ounda
goodpsy
chol
ogi
stwhatwoul
dhav
e
happened,
may
behewoul
dhav
e
changed”Thedoct
ormakehi
swayt
ous.
”
Mor
ning”
“
Mor
ningDoct
orhowi
sshe?
”Iask
“
Shel
ostt
oomuchbl
oodduet
o
mi
scar
ri
ageandduet
oheadi
njur
yshe
sust
ained,
wehadt
oputheroni
nduced
comat
opr
otectt
hebr
ainf
rom
swel
l
ing.
”
“
Oht
hanky
oudoct
orcanweseeher
”
“
Justf
orami
nut
e”Wenodandf
oll
ow
hi
m,seei
ngherl
yi
nghel
plesshi
tme
har
d.I
fIhandl
edt
hesi
tuat
ionbet
tershe
woul
dn’
tbel
yi
ngher
eint
hishospi
tal
bedImustsayi
twassobr
aveofhert
o
shootKhumal
o.

Howonei
sex
pect
edt
ogoonf
orday
s
wi
thoutai
r?Howonei
sex
pect
edt
ogo
onwi
thoutahear
t?I
’
mfai
l
ingdi
smal
l
y
t
ogoonwi
thoutmyhear
tandwi
thout
t
heai
rthatIbr
eat
he.If
eel
li
keeach
passi
ngmi
nut
ewi
thoutherbei
ngf
ound,
I
’
mlosi
ngher
.It
’sbeenaweeksi
ncemy
Dol
l
facedi
sappear
edandsof
arwe
hav
en’
thear
dany
thi
ngf
rom t
hepol
i
ce.
I
’
m dr
owni
ngdeepi
ntot
heoceanand
t
heonl
ythi
ngt
hatcancomet
omy
r
escuei
stoseemyDol
l
faceunhar
med.I
f
eel
soawf
ulabouthowt
hingswer
e
bet
weenushowIwi
shIt
oldherhow
sor
ryIam andhowmuchIl
oveher
.The
whol
eweekIhav
en’
tbeent
oschool
,I
’m
soweakf
oraguy
,Iknow.Ij
ustcan’
t
hel
pmy
sel
fwheni
t’
scomest
oher
.My
wor
ldl
i
ter
all
yst
opsnj
eandIcan’
thel
pit
.
Goi
ngday
swi
thoutknowi
ngwher
eshe
i
s,i
ski
l
li
ngmei
nthedept
hofmysoul
.I
hopewher
evershei
sshe’
ssaf
e.

Iwi
pet
het
ear
sthatcan’
tst
opf
all
i
ng,
mypi
l
lowi
ssoakedwi
thmyt
ear
s.
Cr
yingi
sal
lI’
veev
erdonehowIwi
shi
t
hel
psbuti
tdoesn’
t.Imi
sshersomuch
andherscentonherhoodi
ethatI
’
m
wear
ingi
smaki
ngmemel
anchol
y,Why
l
i
fei
sthi
scr
uel
?Thi
ngswer
enev
er
supposedt
otur
noutl
i
ket
hisbutI
’
m
gl
adKhumal
oisdead.Ihearaknockon
t
hedoorbutIdon’
thav
est
rengt
hto
ev
ent
alksot
hatper
sonmakeshi
sor
herwayi
nandsi
tsonmybed.
“
Babyy
ouhav
etoeatsomet
hingy
ou
can’
tst
arv
eyour
sel
fboy
”Mymom say
s
br
ushi
ngmyst
ainedt
ear
sface
“
Howwoul
dIeatnotknowi
ngi
fshehas
eat
enmama”
“
Ohboy
..comeher
e”Isi
tonmybut
t
andbur
ymyheadonherbosom bef
ore
l
ett
ingoutagutwr
enchi
ngsob.
”
“
Shhi
t’
sgoi
ngt
obeokaybaby
”
“
IwantmyDol
l
facemamapl
ease”Icr
y
l
i
keabi
tch.Ev
eryt
imeIt
hinkofher
,I
can’
thel
pbutt
hinkofpai
nthatmi
ghtbe
i
nfl
i
ctedonherandi
tbr
eaksmyal
ready
br
okenhear
t.Ihat
emy
sel
fthatI
’
m her
e
andshe’
swher
evershei
swi
thnoone
el
se’
s.Ishoul
dbet
her
eforher
!She
needsme!
“
Wewi
l
lfi
ndherbaby
”
“
Nomamay
ouhav
ebeensay
ingt
hatf
or
awhol
eweeknow.IwantmyDol
l
face”
“
Thepol
i
cear
edoi
ngev
ery
thi
ngt
hey
canshewoul
dbef
oundIpr
omi
sey
ou”I
wi
sht
hat
’smakesmef
eel
bet
terbuti
t
doesn’
tit
.Thehopekeepsf
adi
ngaway
byeachsecondpassi
ng.
“
Don’
tcr
ymyboy
.Iunder
standt
haty
ou
ar
egoi
ngt
hrought
hewor
standweal
l
wor
ri
edaboutMi
rabuty
ouneedt
obe
st
rong.Mondayy
ouhav
etogobackt
o
school
I’
m sur
eMi
rawoul
dn’
twanty
ou
t
ofl
unkbecausey
ouwer
elocki
ng
y
our
sel
finy
ourr
oom t
hewhol
eweek
cr
yingf
orher
.Qi
naLwandl
elwenkosi
”
(
Best
rong)Inodwi
thmyhead
“
Nowl
et’
sgoImadey
ouy
ourf
avor
it
e
sandwi
ch”
“
I’
m nothungr
y”
“
Boycomeony
ouhav
en’
tbeeneat
ing
f
ort
hewhol
eweekandy
ouhav
elost
wei
ghtwi
thi
naweek.YouwantMi
rat
o
comebackt
othi
sskel
etonHay
i
Lwandl
eyouar
eal
readyski
nnyy
ou
can’
taf
for
dtost
arv
eyour
sel
f”Imanage
t
olaugh
“
Say
sthesamewomanwhoIi
nher
it
ed
t
heski
nnybodyf
rom”
“
Hai
boLwandl
eI’
m notski
nnymi
na!I
’
m
pet
it
e!”
“
It
’st
hesamedi
ff
erence”
“
Hay
iit
’snott
hesame,
getup”
“
I’
m comi
ng”Ipul
lbackandshewi
pes
myt
ear
sbef
oremaki
ngherwayout
.I
l
ookatmyDol
l
face’
spi
ctur
esonmy
phoneandwal
kout
.If
inddadhuggi
nga
cr
yingmom
“
I’
m scar
edBheki
whati
fwenev
erf
ind
her
,whatwi
l
lIsayt
oBongawhenshe
wakesup?
”
“
Wewi
l
lfi
ndhersweet
hear
tandmay
be
Bongaknowswher
eMi
rai
s”
“
Yout
hinkso?
”
“
Yesl
et’
swai
tforhert
owakeup”
“
Hidad”Theyl
etgoofeachot
herand
l
ookatme
“
Heyson,
it’
sgoodt
oseey
ououtoft
hat
bedr
oom”Isi
gh
“
Sitdownandeat
”Idoasshesayand
eat
“
Iwantt
ogot
othehospi
tal
now”
“
Iwantt
oseemal
ume,
pleasewai
tfor
me”myuncl
eisal
way
satt
hehospi
tal
if
he’
snotoutt
her
elooki
ngf
orMi
ra.I
f
ini
sheat
ingt
henmom andIl
eav
efor
t
hehospi
tal
.Wef
indmal
umeont
he
phone,
tal
ki
ngabouthi
speopl
ethatar
e
l
ooki
ngf
orMi
ra.Hel
ookssool
dwi
tha
bear
ed.Hehasal
way
sbeent
heonet
o
knowhowt
ohandl
ehi
semot
ionsbut
t
hisi
saf
fect
inghi
m mor
ethanIt
hought
i
twoul
d.Mom andhi
m ar
enotongood
speaki
ngt
ermsaboutt
hiswhol
e
si
tuat
ion.I
t’
sreal
l
ybad.
“
Howi
sshet
oday
?”Iask
“
She’
sst
il
lthesame”
“
Foundany
thi
ngaboutMi
ra?
”
“
Theyar
est
il
ll
ooki
ng”
“
IfMi
radi
es,
it’
swi
l
lbeony
ouKhuz
ani
!”
“
Mom st
opt
hi….
”
“
Thul
awenaI
’
m nott
alki
ngt
oyou!
”
“
Nomom st
opi
tmal
umeneedsy
our
suppor
t!Can’
tyouseet
hisi
sal
ready
eat
inghi
m!Yeswemessedupbutwe
ar
eal
lhumanwhodoesn’
tmake
mi
stakeshuh?
”
“
Mist
ake?Thi
sisnotami
stakey
ouguy
s
pl
annedt
his!
”
“
Okaywemadeabadchoi
cel
i
ke
ev
ery
onewoul
dst
opbr
eat
hingonour
necks.Weacknowl
edget
hedamage
t
hiswhol
ethi
ngdi
d!”
“
Noi
tsf
ineLwandl
elwenkosi
I
under
standy
ourmom’
sangerbutcoul
d
y
oubot
htaket
hisconv
ersat
iont
o
out
sidey
ouar
emaki
ngnoi
se.I
’
m sur
e
asadoct
orZol
ekay
ouunder
stand”As
mom i
saboutt
orepl
yshe’
sint
err
upt
ed
bymom Bongawhocal
l
soutf
orMi
ra
bef
oreopeni
ngherey
es
“
Bongahey
”shehol
dsherhand
“
Don’
ttr
ytomov
eyouwi
l
lhur
tyour
sel
f”
Mom Bongal
ooksal
lofus
“
Wher
e’sMi
ra?
”
“
Uhm”
”
Uphi
umt
anami
Zo?
”Wel
ookateach
ot
her
,wer
eal
l
ythoughtmay
beshe
knowswher
eMi
rai
shi
dingbecause
honest
lywedon’
tknowwhathappened.
Myhear
tsi
nkst
omyst
omachmy
Dol
l
facewher
ear
eyou?
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdaySy
lvi
aMol
ebat
si
andHappyBi
rt
hdayLondy
Kamaphumul
oDl
ami
ni&Nkul
iFi
hla

CHAPTER29

Ihearf
ami
l
iarv
oicesshout
ingandI
openmyey
esandl
ookatmy
sur
roundi
ngs,
Ireal
i
zeI
’
mint
hehospi
tal
andev
ery
thi
ngcomecr
ashi
ngbackl
i
ke
t
onofbr
icks.If
eel
myhear
tshat
ter
ing
byeachpi
ctur
ethatf
lashbef
oremy
ey
es.Il
ookatt
hesepeopl
egat
her
ed
ar
oundme.I
t’
sZo,
Lwandl
elwenkosi
and
anot
herman,
hel
ooksf
ami
l
iar
,It
hink
I
’
veseenhi
m bef
orebutI
’
m notsur
e.
“
Wher
e’sMi
ra”Isayl
ooki
ngatZo
“
Uhm”Iseepai
nfl
ashherf
aceandmy
hear
tli
ter
all
yst
ops.
“
Uphi
umt
anami
Zo”myv
oicei
sshaki
ng,
I
’
m sonotr
eadyt
ohearwhatshe’
s
aboutt
osay
.
“
She.
..
uhm.
.”Shebl
i
nkshert
ear
sback
andIseeLwandl
ewi
pinghi
steart
hat
hasescapedt
henhemakeshi
swayout
.
Themanf
oll
owsbehi
ndhi
m.
“
NononoZopl
easet
ell
meshe’
sokay
!”
I
’
m al
readyi
ntear
s
“
Youneedt
ocal
m downBonga”
“
Wher
e’smyMi
racl
e?”Shet
akesmy
handi
ntoher
sandsqueez
esi
t
“
Zol
ekaNkosi
!”Isnap
“
Wedon’
tknowBonga,
wet
ri
edl
ooki
ng
f
orherandev
ent
hepol
i
cear
elooki
ng
f
orherbutwecan’
tfi
ndher
.Wewer
e
hopi
ngt
haty
out
haty
oucoul
dex
plai
n
whatr
eal
l
yhappenedmay
bet
hatwoul
d
hav
ehel
ped.I
t’
sbeenaweeknow”
“
Aweek?NoZowhati
fshe’
sdead
somewher
ewhati
fOhl
ord…”Ibur
sti
nto
t
oal
oudsobandshehol
dsmei
nher
ar
ms
“
I’
m sor
ryBonga,
wewi
l
lfi
ndher
”
“
Ishoul
dn’
thav
etol
dhert
orunZo,
it’
s
myf
aul
t!Ishoul
dhav
epr
otect
edherbut
Iwasscar
edt
hatwhenhe’
sdonewi
th
mehewi
l
lki
l
lher
.”
“
Doy
ouknowwher
eshecoul
dbe?
”
“
Mir
adoesn’
thav
efr
iendsex
ceptGugu.
WhataboutSox
?”
“
Heal
sodoesn’
tknowwher
eshei
s”
“
Lor
dumt
anami
Zo”
“
Shhdon’
tcr
ysi
si,
wewi
l
ldoev
ery
thi
ng
t
ofi
ndher
”
“
Youar
emydoct
orr
ight
?”
“
No”
“
Tel
lwhoev
ermydoct
ori
stodi
schar
ge
me.Ican’
tsi
ther
ewhi
l
emydaught
eri
s
outt
her
eal
one.Ihav
etof
indher
”
“
NoBongay
ouneedt
orest
…”Icuther
shor
t
“
Rest
?HowcanIr
estwhenmydaught
er
i
smi
ssi
ng?
”
“
Thepol
i
ce…”
“
Don’
ttel
lmeaboutt
hepol
i
ce!
”
“
Youneedt
otakei
teasyBonga.Ther
e’s
t
oomuchgoi
ngonandy
ourbodyi
sst
il
l
r
ecov
eri
ngandy
ourheadt
oo.Mi
raneed
y
ouheal
thyandst
rong”
“
How.Howi
sKhumal
o”Shepul
l
sme
backandl
ooksatmeconf
used
“
Whatr
eal
l
yhappenedBonga?
”
“
Hecamebackhomeangr
y,Idon’
tknow
whot
oldhi
m aboutMi
raand
Lwandl
elwenkosi
try
ingt
otakehi
m
down.It
houghtIknewhi
m whenhe’
s
angr
ybutt
hatni
ght
,hewasl
i
kea
possessedani
mal
.Hesl
appedmeand
t
hatt
ri
gger
edmyanger
.It
oldhi
m my
pi
eceofmi
ndwhi
chmadehi
m angr
ier
.
Hebeatt
heshi
toutofme.It
ri
edt
ofi
ght
hi
m andbyt
het
imehewasgr
oani
ng,
I
t
oldMi
rat
orun.Iknewt
hatoncehe’
s
donewi
thmehewi
l
lgot
oher
.Itwasa
st
upi
dthi
ngt
osaybuti
t’
stheonl
ythi
ng
t
hatIt
houghtof
.Icoul
dn’
tjustl
ethi
m
ki
l
lusbot
h.Oneofushadt
osur
viv
e.I
knewt
hati
twast
heendf
ormeandI
accept
edbutsomet
hingi
nmesnapped
It
ri
edt
ofi
ghthi
m nomat
terhowst
rong
hewas.Ir
eal
i
zet
hatIwasn’
twi
nni
ngI
gr
abbedt
hechai
randhi
thi
m,whi
l
ehe
wasgr
oani
ngi
npai
nIf
oundmywayt
o
t
hest
udyr
oom,
towher
ehekeepshi
s
guni
nthesaf
e.Byt
het
imehewal
kedi
n
Iwascar
ryi
ngi
twi
thmybot
hhandsand
r
eadyt
oshoothi
m.Oneofushadt
odi
e
t
hatni
ghtandIknewi
fIl
ethi
m get
cl
oset
omeI
’
mtheonewho’
sgoi
ngt
o
di
e.Ipul
l
edt
het
ri
gger
,hef
ell
down.I
don’
tknowt
hatwhathappenedaf
ter
t
hat
,It
hinkIl
ostconsci
ousness.
”Ikeep
mywi
pingmyt
ear
sasInar
rat
ewhat
happenedandZoi
scr
yingt
oo.
“
OhBonga,
thatwassobr
aveofy
ou”
“
Howi
she?
”
“
He’
sdeadsi
si”If
reez
edi
gest
ingwhat
shej
ustsai
d.I
tbr
eaksmyhear
tnow
t
hather
eal
l
ydi
edandI
’
mtheonewho
ki
l
ledhi
m.
“
I’
m sor
ryBonga”
“
Iknowt
hathewasgoi
ngt
oki
l
lmei
fI
di
dn’
tshoothi
m andhehasn’
tbeen
t
reat
ingmegoodbutIl
ovedhi
m Zo.My
hear
tissobr
okent
hathe’
sdead”Il
et
outagutwr
enchi
ngsob
“
I’
m sor
rysi
si,
youdi
dwhaty
ouhadt
o
dot
osav
eyour
sel
f”Sheengul
fsmei
n
herar
ms.Howwi
l
lIev
ermov
eonf
rom
t
hispai
n,i
t’
sjustt
oomuchf
orone
per
son.
“
Didmybabysur
viv
e?”
“
No,
I’
m sor
ry”Icr
yformymi
ssi
ng
daught
er,
Icr
yformyhusbandwhom I
ki
l
led,
Icr
yformyunbor
nbabywhoI
mi
scar
ri
ed.OnceI
’
m cal
m Zocal
l
sthe
doct
orandt
heymov
emet
oanot
her
r
oom.Mywhol
ebodyi
sinpai
nbuti
t’
s
not
hingcompar
edt
othepai
nbur
ningi
n
mysoul
.Iwi
shal
loft
hisi
sjusta
hor
ri
bleni
ght
mar
e.Zol
eav
esandt
he
mant
hatwasher
eear
li
eronwal
ksi
n.I
l
ookathi
m ashemakeshi
swayi
n,I
’
m
t
ryi
ngt
opl
acehi
m,t
ryi
ngt
oputaname
t
oaf
ace.Hegr
absachai
randsi
tsoni
t
t
henl
ooksatme
“
Hi”
“
Hel
l
o”
“
I’
m gl
ady
ouar
eawake,
Iwasso
wor
ri
edabouty
ouandIpr
omi
sey
ouI
wi
l
lfi
ndMi
ra”
“
I’
m sor
ryIdon’
tmeant
ober
udebut
whoar
eyou?
”
“
Ohy
esex
cusemymanner
s.I
’
m
Khuz
ani
Msi
mango,
Zo’
sbr
other
”Oht
he
uncl
ethatpl
ayedmydaught
er
“
Hav
ewemetbef
ore?
”
“
Yesr
emembert
hedayy
ouf
orgoty
our
changeatt
hephar
macy
”
“
Ohy
es…di
dIr
eal
l
yfor
gotmychange
ori
twasi
tal
soy
ourpar
tofy
ourpl
ant
o
t
akemyhusbanddown?
”Hesi
ghs
heav
il
yandl
ooksatmewi
thi
ntensi
ty
“
I’
m sor
ryNokubongaonhowev
ery
thi
ng
t
urnedout
”Heex
plai
nsev
ery
thi
ngf
rom
t
hebegi
nni
ng.Di
ff
erentemot
ions
engul
fsmebutangerov
erpower
sot
her
emot
ions.
“
Youbast
ard,
thi
sisal
lyourbl
oodyf
aul
t!
Iwantmydaught
er,
doy
ouhearme!I
wantmydaught
er!Youar
eev
il
,pl
ayi
ng
wi
thpeopl
e’
sli
ves!I
fyouwant
ed
Khumal
oyoushoul
dhav
efacedhi
mli
ke
amanandnotusemydaught
er!
”
“
I’
m sor
ryBonga,
Ireal
l
yam sor
ry….
”
“
Wil
lyoursor
rychangeany
thi
nghuh?
Wi
l
lyoursor
rymakemeunshootmy
husband?Wi
l
lyoursor
ryf
indmy
daught
er?Wi
l
lyoursor
rybr
ingbackmy
baby
?Wi
l
lyoursor
ryt
akeawayt
hepai
n
If
eel
rightnow?Noi
twon’
t,
your
uined
ourl
i
ves!Hewasr
eal
l
ygoi
ngt
ochange
i
fyouandKhany
iwer
en’
tpl
ayi
nghi
m!I
hat
eyou!Ihat
eyou!
”Icr
yandhet
ri
est
o
hugmebutIpushhi
m
“
Getout
!”
“
Bonga…”
“
Gett
hef
uckout
!”Heheav
easi
ghand
getupbef
oremaki
nghi
swayoutbut
whenheget
stot
hedoorIcal
lhi
m.He
swi
vel
aroundandl
ooksatme.
“
LetKhany
igo,
don’
tdoany
thi
ngt
oher
”
“
What
?”
“
Youhear
dme,
she’
smyni
eceaf
teral
l
”
“
Youdon’
tunder
standt
hehat
redshe
hasf
ory
ou,
shewon’
tst
opunt
ily
oudi
e
l
i
kehermom”
“
Idon’
tcar
e,Ihav
enot
hingt
oli
vef
or
any
way
”
“
That
’snott
rue,
youhav
eMi
ra”
“
Shecoul
dbedeadbecauseofy
ou!
”
“
Iwon’
trestunt
ilIf
indherBonga,
even
i
fit
’st
hel
astt
hingIdo”wi
tht
hatsai
dhe
t
urnsar
oundandwal
ksoutl
eav
ingme
i
ntear
s.

Ikeephopi
ngany
onewi
l
lwakemeup
f
rom t
hishor
ri
bleni
ght
mar
ebutno.The
mor
eday
spassesbyt
hemor
eitsi
nks
i
n.I
t’
sbeenf
ewday
ssi
nceIhav
ebeen
di
schar
ged.MyMi
racl
ehav
en’
tbeen
f
ound,
I’
mlosi
ngmymi
ndeachpassi
ng
second.Ican’
thel
pthescenar
iosof
t
hingst
hatmi
ghthav
ehappenedt
oher
andi
ttearmei
ntopi
eces.Todayi
smy
husband’
sfuner
alI
’
m notl
ooki
ng
f
orwar
dtobur
yinghi
m.I
t’
snol
i
ethatI
l
ovehi
m asabusi
veashewas.Hewas
myev
ery
thi
ngandnowi
tbr
ingsmeso
muchpai
nthatI
’
mresponsi
blef
orhi
s
deat
h.

I
’
m amur
der
erev
ent
hought
hepol
i
ce
sayi
sitwassel
f-
def
encebutI
tdoesn’
t
changet
hef
actt
hatIt
ooksomeone’
s
l
i
feandnotj
ustsomeonebutt
hel
oveof
myl
i
fe.Comi
ngt
oter
mswi
tht
hef
act
t
hatI
’
mtheonewhoki
l
ledhi
misa
st
ruggl
e.Howi
soneex
pect
edt
odeal
wi
tht
hef
actt
hatsheki
l
ledt
hel
oveof
herl
ove?I
t’
stoomucht
otakei
n,If
eel
l
i
keIwi
l
llosemymi
nd.Il
ookmy
sel
fin
t
hemi
rr
or,
Ihav
ejustf
ini
shedget
ti
ng
dr
essedi
nmybl
ackdr
essandsandal
s.I
l
ooksohor
ri
ble,
myey
esar
eredand
swol
l
ensoi
smyf
acebutIdon’
tcar
e.
Ther
e’saknockont
hedoor
.

“
Comei
n”Ishout
,thedoorswi
ngsopen
andGugumakesherwayi
n
“
Her
e”Shehandsmemyhi
pfl
ask.Ihad
askhert
ofi
l
litf
orme.
“
Thanky
ousweet
hear
t”Iopeni
tand
t
akeasi
pofmyv
odka.
“
Mama?
”
“
Yes?
”
“
Doy
out
hinkMi
rawoul
dbef
oundi
t’
s
al
mostt
woweeksnow?
”
“
IhopesoIr
eal
l
yhopeso”
“
Imi
sshersomuch”Tear
sfal
l
sdown
herf
ace
“
Met
oo”Ipul
lheri
nmyar
msandhug
her
.Gugucamet
hedaybef
ore
y
est
erday
,whenshef
oundoutt
hatMi
ra
i
smi
ssi
ng.
“
Ifeel
sohor
ri
blemamashehadbeen
t
ryi
ngt
ogethol
dofmebutIwasn’
t
t
her
eforherandnowshe’
smi
ssi
ng”
“
OhGugudon’
tbehar
dony
our
sel
fyou
di
dn’
tknowwhatwoul
dhappened”I
al
sof
eel
hor
ri
blet
hatIspentt
hel
ast
day
swi
thhermadatherandt
he
possi
bil
i
tyt
hatt
hoseday
smi
ghtbet
he
l
astt
imeIspentwi
thheri
t’
sshat
ter
smy
hear
t.Nomamakesherwayi
naf
ter
knocki
ngonce.
“
It
’st
imeBonga”Gugupul
l
sawayand
wal
ksout
“
I’
m notr
eadyNoma”
“
Icani
magi
nebutwhyBonga?
”
“
Huh?
”
“
Whyhav
eyounev
ert
oldmet
hathe
wasabusi
ngy
ou?It
houghtwewer
e
f
ri
ends”
“
It
’snoteasyt
oshar
etheset
hings
Noma”
“
ButI
’
myourbestf
ri
endBonga!
”
“
GoshNomaIdon’
thav
eti
mef
ort
his”I
makemywayt
othemast
erbedr
oom
wher
emyhusbandi
sbei
ngv
iewed.He
l
ookssopeacef
ulwi
thabul
l
ethol
eon
hi
sfor
eheadIbur
sti
ntot
ear
s.
“
I’
m sor
ryKhumal
o,I
’
mreal
l
ysor
ryI
hopey
ouwi
l
lfor
giv
eme”Noma’
s
mot
heri
nlawenv
elopesmei
nherar
ms
“
I’
m sor
rysi
si”ImustsayNoma’
s
husband’
sfami
l
yhav
ebeenv
ery
suppor
ti
ve.Theyr
eal
l
ycamet
hroughf
or
mesi
nceIhav
enof
ami
l
y.Weal
ll
eav
e
f
orchur
ch.Iseet
heNkosi
fami
l
y
i
ncl
udi
ngt
heuncl
e,Idon’
tknowwhat
t
heyar
edoi
ngher
e.Imadei
tcl
eart
hatI
wantnot
hingt
odowi
tht
hem any
mor
e.
“
Nif
unani
laZol
eka”(
whaty
’al
ldoi
ng
her
e)
“
Wecamet
osuppor
tyouZo,
please
st
oppushi
ngmeaway
”
“
‘Meet
ingy
ourf
ami
l
ycausedsomuch
pai
ninmyl
i
fe.Idon’
twanty
ouher
ego!
”
“
Bongapl
ease”Zobegs
“
Isai
dhambani
!!
!!
!!
”Iscr
eam at
tr
act
ing
at
tent
iont
ous.Theyl
eav
eandImake
mywayi
ntot
hechur
ch.Myhusband’
s
f
uner
algoeswel
laf
tert
hathe’
slayt
o
r
est
.Ican’
tbel
i
evehe’
sreal
l
ygone.Rest
i
nPeaceMt
ungwa,
Iwi
l
lal
way
slov
eyou.

It
ryt
okeepcal
m butI
’
mlosi
ngmy
sani
tyeachpassi
ngday
.It
’sbeenf
ull
6
mont
hsandmydaught
erst
il
li
snot
f
ound.I
’
m st
ucki
nli
mboandnoone
seemst
ocomet
hroughf
orme.I
thas
beent
hedar
kest6mont
hsofmyl
i
fe.I
wonderi
fshe’
ssaf
e.I
fshehaseat
en?I
f
shehassomet
hingt
owear
?Ohmypoor
babycant
hel
ordhav
emer
cyt
hisi
s
unbear
abl
enow.Ican’
ttakei
t,i
t’
stoo
much.Myphoner
ingsf
ort
hehundr
ed
t
imeIl
ookati
t,i
t’
sZol
eka.Thi
swoman
doesn’
twantt
ogeti
t.Idon’
tknowhow
manyt
imesIhav
ethr
ownheroutofmy
housebutshe’
snotgi
vi
ngup.I
t’
sthei
r
f
aul
tmyl
i
fet
urnedoutl
i
ket
his.Thi
s
housef
eel
ssoempt
ywi
thoutmy
husbandanddaught
er.I
t’
ssol
onel
yand
mel
anchol
i
c.Isi
ponmyv
odka,
ithas
becomemyev
ery
daymeal
justt
ogo
t
hrought
heday
.I’
m br
owsi
ngt
hrough
mypi
csl
ooki
ngatmybeaut
if
ul
daught
er.
“
Wher
ear
eyoumyMi
racl
e,mom i
s
dy
ingher
ewi
thouty
ou”

I
t’
sbeent
ort
uroussi
xmont
hsofmyl
i
fe
wi
thoutmyDol
l
face.Imi
sshersomuch,
Ij
ustwantt
ohol
dheri
nmyar
msand
ki
ssher
.It
ryt
obephi
l
osophi
cal
and
hopi
ngt
hatshewi
l
lbef
oundbutt
he
mor
emont
hspassesby
,hopef
ades
away
.Li
fei
ssogl
oomywi
thouther
.I
can’
tev
enbegi
ntocompr
ehendhowI
’
m
f
eel
i
ngr
ightnow.Ihav
en’
tseenmom
Bongaf
ormont
hs,
shedoesn’
twant
any
thi
ngt
odowi
thus.Mom i
snot
gi
vi
nguponhert
houghandIf
oundout
t
hatshe’
sdr
owni
ngher
sel
final
cohol
ev
eryday
.If
eel
forher
,shel
ostt
oo
muchatonce.Mal
umehasn’
tst
op
l
ooki
ngf
orMi
raandt
hingsbet
weenhi
m
andmom ar
ewor
senowt
hatMom
Bongahat
esus.Snoi
sal
way
saski
ng
f
orMi
ra,
it’
sal
lmessedup.Ihav
ebeen
l
i
steni
ngt
ofl
ashl
i
ghtbyJessi
J.I
t’
son
r
epeat
,itr
emi
ndsmeofmyDol
l
face.I
t’
s
l
i
keIcanseehersi
ngi
ngf
orme.

“
Whent
omor
rowcomes
I
'
llbeonmyown
Feel
i
ngf
ri
ght
enedof
Thet
hingst
hatIdon'
tknow
Whent
omor
rowcomes
Tomor
rowcomes
Tomor
rowcomes
Andt
hought
her
oadi
slong
Il
ookupt
othesky
Andi
nthedar
kIf
ound,
Il
osthopet
hatIwon'
tfl
y
AndIsi
ngal
ong,
Isi
ngal
ong
AndIsi
ngal
ong
Igotal
lIneedwhenIgoty
ouandI
Il
ookar
oundme,
andseeasweetl
i
fe
I
'
m st
ucki
nthedar
kbuty
ou'
remy
f
lashl
i
ght
You'
reget
ti
ngme,
get
ti
ngmet
hrough
t
heni
ght
Ki
ckst
artmyhear
twheny
oushi
nei
tin
myey
es
Can'
tl
ie,
it'
sasweetl
i
fe”Tear
sruns
downont
hesi
deofmyf
ace.Iheara
knockonmydoorandshout
“
Comei
n”Dadwal
ksi
n.
“
Son”Hesi
tsnex
ttome
“
Dad”
“
Itki
l
lsmet
oseey
oudr
if
ti
ngf
urt
her
i
ntoadar
khol
e.Iwi
sht
her
ewas
somet
hingIcoul
ddo”
“
Imi
ssherdad”
“
Iknowandy
ouhav
etobeposi
ti
ve”
“
I’
mlosi
ngf
ait
h”
“
Don’
tsayt
hatpl
ease”
“
Ithur
tsdad”Hepul
l
smei
nhi
sar
ms
andhugsme
“
IknowIhav
en’
tbeenagoodf
atherand
I
’
m sor
ryboy
.Ihat
emy
sel
fst
il
ltoday
aboutwhatIdi
d.Iwasnev
eragood
ex
ampl
etoy
ou.Youhav
ear
ightt
ofeel
t
hewayy
ouf
eel
aboutme.Iwantt
o
apol
ogi
zemysonandIwantust
owor
k
onourr
elat
ionshi
p.Imi
ssy
ou”Isi
gh
“
It
’sokaydad,
Imi
ssy
out
oo”wechi
l
l
t
oget
herandt
alk,
try
ingt
obond.Idi
dn’
t
r
eal
i
zehowmuchI
’
vemi
ssedhi
m unt
il
now.Af
terourbondi
ngsessi
on,
Igot
o
ki
tchent
omakesomet
hingt
oeat
.
Nandi
’
sphoner
ingsont
hecount
er.I
t
akei
tandl
ookatt
hecal
l
eront
he
scr
een,
it’
sTshepo.Idi
dn’
tknowt
hey
cal
leachot
her
.Thephonest
opsr
ingi
ng
andInot
icet
hatt
heywer
echat
ti
ngv
ia
What
sApp,
Ican’
thel
pmy
sel
fbutr
ead
t
het
ext
s.I
t’
sseemsl
i
keTshepoi
s
aski
ngherout
.Ther
e’sav
ideot
hatwas
sentbyhi
m.Wher
eTshepowashel
ping
mer
ehear
sescenest
hatwewer
egoi
ng
t
opl
ayatschool
.Somehowheasked
meaboutMi
raandIt
oldhi
m howIwas
hel
pingmyuncl
e,Iputoneandone
t
oget
her
.Itmakessense
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngwi
thmyphone?
”
“
Youar
etheonewhot
oldMi
ra,
isn’
tit
?”
“
Idon’
tknowwhaty
ouar
etal
ki
ng
about
!”
“
Don’
tmakemey
ourf
ool
!Itwasy
ou
I
nnocenci
a!”
“
Giv
emebackmyphone!
”Shet
ri
est
o
t
akei
tandIpul
li
tawayf
rom her
,we
f
ightf
ori
tamoment
.Shebi
tesmyar
m
andIpushhersendi
ngherr
eel
i
ng
backwar
dunt
ilshef
all
sdownonf
loor
andscr
eamsi
nagony
.Mydadcomes
r
ushi
ngt
ous
“
What
’sgoi
ngon”
“
Hepushedme”Shescr
eams,
wit
hin
secondswer
ushhert
othehospi
tal
.I
hopet
heyar
egoi
ngt
obef
ineIdi
dn’
t
meant
opushherbutshewasbi
ti
ngme.
Thewai
tiski
l
li
ngme,
mom comest
ous
andIex
plai
nev
ery
thi
ng.
“
AwkodaLwandl
enawe!
!”Af
tert
hel
ong
wai
tthedoct
orcomest
ous
“
Howar
ethey
?”Dadasks
“
I’
m sor
ry,
wecoul
dn’
tsav
ethebaby
”
mywor
ldshutdown.
CHAPTER30

“
Ihopey
ouar
est
il
lkeepi
nganey
eon
her
,she’
sver
ydanger
oust
hatoneandI
can’
ttr
ustherany
mor
e”
“
Ofcour
seSpi
j
omst
rustme,
rightnow
I
’
m wat
chi
ngather
.Shei
scomi
ngf
rom
t
hedoct
orasusual
”
“
Asusual
younev
ert
oldmeshe’
ssi
ck?
”
“
She’
spr
egnant
”
“
Real
l
y?It
houghtshewasl
yi
ng,
try
ingt
o
sav
eher
sel
f”
“
Wel
ltur
nsoutshe’
snotl
yi
ng”
“
Damn!
”
“
Ihav
etogo,
Iwi
l
lkeepy
ouupdat
ed”
“
Sur
e”
Ican’
tbel
i
eveKhany
iisr
eal
l
ypr
egnant
wi
thKhumal
o’sbaby
.It
hought“
shegot
t
his”f
all
i
ngpr
egnantwasnev
erpar
tof
t
hepl
an.I
t’
sseemsl
i
keshewasr
eal
l
y
st
art
ingt
ofal
lforhi
m.Nowshewi
l
l
hav
ear
emi
nderofapl
annedmi
ssi
on
gonewr
ongwow.Iwonderi
fshewi
l
lbe
abl
etol
i
vewi
tht
hat
.I’
m wat
chi
ngher
cl
osel
y,Ican’
ttr
usthernow.She’
sa
dangert
ousbutmost
lyt
oBonga.I
want
edt
osor
theroutbutBongasai
dI
mustl
ethergo.Yousee,
weal
lhav
e
skel
etonsi
nthecl
oset
.Itcamedownt
o
meusi
ngwhat
everi
nfor
mat
ionIhav
e,I
t
oldhert
hatIdon’
twantt
oev
erseeher
agai
nandi
fsheev
ert
ri
est
obeat
hor
n
i
nBonga’
sass,
itwi
l
lbeal
lov
erf
orher
.
Thepastsi
xmont
hshav
ebeenhel
lfor
ev
ery
one.Ev
ery
thi
ngi
sjustmessedup.I
can’
tfi
ndMi
ra,
Idon’
tunder
standhow
shecanj
ustdi
sappearwi
thoutat
race
si
gh!Myr
elat
ionshi
pwi
thmysi
steri
s
di
sint
egr
ati
ngeachpassi
ngsecond.I
don’
tknowhowt
oreachoutt
oher
.
She’
ssupermadathowev
ery
thi
ng
t
urnedoutandBongawant
ingnot
hing
t
odowi
thusi
snothel
pingt
hesi
tuat
ion.
Lwandl
elwenkosi
issl
owl
ydr
if
ti
ngi
nto
t
hedar
khol
e,hesmokesweedl
i
kea
chi
mneyandIoncesawhi
m snor
ti
ng
cocai
ne.Hepr
omi
sedmet
hathewoul
d
nev
ersmokeagai
nbutIknowt
hathe’
s
st
il
lsmoki
ngweed.Sno,
myl
i
ttl
eloud
mout
hisf
orev
eraski
ngf
orMi
ra,
some
day
stot
hepoi
ntt
hatshecr
ies.Then
t
her
e’sBonga,
ohGodt
hatwoman,
she’
ssi
nki
ngi
ntodepr
essi
onsl
owl
ybut
sur
ely
,she’
sdr
inki
ngl
i
keashar
k.Idon’
t
knowhowt
ofi
xal
loft
hisandIf
eel
so
awf
ul.Theonl
ythi
ngt
hatcameout
bet
teri
sthatIwasabl
etodi
gBr
enda
andbur
yherwher
emydaught
eri
sabl
e
t
ovi
sither
.Itwasn’
teasyt
ell
i
nghert
hat
hermom di
edbutatl
eastshe’
sget
ti
ng
bet
terdaybyday
.Idon’
tregr
etpl
anni
ng
t
otakedownKhumal
obutIr
egr
ethow
ev
ery
thi
ngt
urnedout
,ifIcoul
dI’
dre-
pl
anmymi
ssi
on,
Iwoul
ddocer
tai
n
t
hingsdi
ff
erent
ly.Iadmi
tIwascar
eless
andnowev
ery
thi
ngi
sinal
ament
abl
e
st
ate.
“
Ufunani
?”(
Whatdoy
ouwant
?)
“
Ibr
oughty
oul
unch”
“
I’
m nothungr
y”
“
Zocomeon,
I’
m sor
ry”
“
Yoursor
rywon’
tbr
ingbackMi
ra
Khuz
ani
!Yoursor
rywon’
tmakeBonga
st
ophat
ingme!Yoursor
rywon’
twake
upKhumal
ofr
om t
hedead!
”
“
Whyhav
eyousuddenl
ybecomeaf
an
ofKhumal
ohuh?
”
“
Hedi
dn’
tdeser
vet
odi
eli
ket
hat
!”
“
Owr
eal
l
y,hewasadogZol
eka,
ify
ou
l
i
vel
i
keadogy
ouwi
l
ldi
eli
keadog!I
don’
tunder
standwhyy
ou’
resuddenl
y
hi
sfan.Heabusedhi
swi
feand
daught
er!
”
“
Buthewaswi
l
li
ngt
ochange,
ifonl
yyou
andKhany
iwer
en’
tpl
ayi
nghi
m.Hadhe
f
oundagoodpsy
chol
ogi
st,
hewoul
d
hav
echanged!
”
“
Okayf
inebuthowdoy
ouj
ust
if
y
cheat
ing?Af
teral
lthesey
ear
sandcheat
nowwhy
?He’
sdognj
e!”
“
Tempt
ati
ongott
hebet
terofhi
m!”
“
Hay
iKhumal
owasahy
pocr
it
eheki
l
led
Br
endaf
orcheat
ingy
ethekepton
cheat
ingwi
thKhany
i.May
bei
fitwas
once,
Iwoul
dhav
eunder
stoodbutnohe
keptonf
ucki
ngherov
erandov
er,
yethe
cl
aimedt
olov
eBonga.
”
“
MencheatKhuz
ani
”Ichuckl
eand
shakemyheadi
ndi
sbel
i
ef
“
I’
m sodi
sappoi
ntedt
oheart
hatf
rom
y
ou.I
sthatwhyar
eyoust
il
lwi
th
Bhekumuz
i?Becausemencheat
?”
“
Arewest
il
ltal
ki
ngaboutKhumal
oor
?”
“
Menar
ehumant
ooZol
ekaandt
hey
knowwhot
obef
ait
hful
to.I
fhet
rul
y
l
ovesy
ou,
hewi
l
lrespecty
ouandbe
cont
entwi
thy
oual
one.I
fhehav
enev
er
cheat
edony
ouf
ory
ear
sthensuddenl
y
hest
art
scheat
ingasky
our
sel
fwhy
?”
“
Whoar
ewet
ojudgeKhuz
ani
?Khumal
o
di
dn’
tdeser
vet
odi
ethoughnomat
ter
whathedi
d!”
“
YeZol
ekaubusumf
unay
ini
uVusi
muz
i?”Shegaspsandt
ri
est
osl
ap
mebutIhol
dherhand.
“
Stopmaki
ngmey
ourchi
l
d.Youar
e
t
aki
ngmyr
espectf
ory
ouf
orgr
ant
ed
now”Il
etgoofherandheadout
.I’
m
f
umi
ngwi
thangerIdon’
tunder
standZo.
Real
l
ynow,
onewoul
dthi
nkshewant
ed
Khumal
o.If
indmy
sel
fpar
kedbef
ore
herhouseandsheopenst
hegat
efor
me.
“
Goshi
t’
syou!Ni
ngi
funani
vel
ehuh?
”
Shesl
urs
“
Youar
edr
unk?
”Il
ookar
ound,
the
ki
tcheni
samess,
dishesandbot
tl
esof
v
odkaev
ery
wher
e.
“
Andhowi
sthatanyofy
ourbusi
ness.
Pl
easel
eav
emeal
onepeopl
e!Leav
eme
t
hef
uckal
one!I
fit
’snoty
ou,
it’
syour
si
sterhay
imaan!Ican’
tev
enf
art
!”She
bur
psandst
umbl
esbackwar
dIcat
ch
herbef
oreshef
all
s.
“
Fucky
ouKhuz
ani
doy
ouhearme,
fuck
y
ou!
”Shewi
ggl
esher
sel
fandst
umbl
es
t
othel
i
vingr
oom.If
oll
owher
,wal
ki
ngi
s
ast
ruggl
e.Shef
inal
l
ymakesi
ttot
he
couchandt
hrowsher
sel
foni
tthent
ake
t
hebot
tl
eofv
odka.
“
Youhadenoughnow”
“
Whoar
eyout
otel
lmet
hat
?Getoutof
myhouse!
”
“
BongaIunder
standwhaty
ouar
egoi
ng
t
hroughandI
’
m sor
rybutdr
owni
ng
y
our
sel
final
cohol
won’
thel
patal
l
.Iwi
l
l
f
indMi
ra,
pleasest
opt
his,
shewoul
dbe
hear
tbr
okent
oseey
oul
i
ket
his”
“
It
’sy
ourf
aul
tshe’
smi
ssi
ng!Iwantmy
daught
erKhuz
ani
now!Iwa…”Shebur
ps
andpukesont
hef
loorsomeofherpuke
spat
ter
sonherdr
ess.Igetupt
ofet
cha
gl
assofwat
erbutIf
indhersnor
ing.I
si
ghandwakeherup
“
Bongahav
esomewat
er”
”
Mh-
mh!
”
“
Youneedt
ochangey
ourdr
ess”she
mumbl
esi
ncoher
entt
hings
“
Bonga!
”Nor
esponse.JesuswhatdoI
donow.Igetupandsear
chal
lthe
necessar
ythi
ngst
ocl
eanupherpuke
ont
hef
loor
.OnceI
’
m doneIt
aket
he
t
owel
andwi
pet
hepuket
hati
sonher
af
terdampeni
ngi
twi
thwat
er.She’
sfast
asl
eepandev
ensnor
ing.Shehasl
ost
somuchwei
ghtbutshe’
sst
il
lbeaut
if
ul.
Thehouseneedssomecl
eani
ngIcal
l
mycousi
nfr
om mymom’
ssi
dewho
happenst
oownacl
eani
ngser
vice
companyandsheowesmeaf
avour
.It
’s
doesn’
ttakehal
fanhourf
orher
cl
eaner
stoar
ri
ve.Theydot
hei
r
t
remendouswor
kandl
eav
ethehouse
spar
kli
ngandi
mmacul
ate.I
’
m sur
e
whenshewakesupshewi
l
lbehungr
y,I
or
derapi
zzaandputonhermi
crowav
e
t
henIl
eav
eaf
terwr
it
ingheranot
e.

-
Themomentt
hedoct
orsai
dthey
coul
dn’
tsav
emybabymywhol
ewor
ld
shutdown.Ihav
enev
erdeni
edmybaby
andIwasal
readyl
ooki
ngf
orwar
dtobe
af
atherev
ent
houghInev
erpl
annedi
t.I
can’
tbegi
ntodescr
ibehowI
’
mfeel
i
ng
r
ightnow.Ishoul
dn’
thav
epushedher
!
Godwhydi
dIal
l
owmyangert
ocont
rol
me,
nowshe’
sgone.Iwashopi
ngf
ora
gi
rl
.Isi
tdownt
ryi
ngt
otakei
nal
lthese
shat
ter
ingnews.
“
I’
m sor
ryson”Dadsay
sashesi
tsnex
t
t
omeandcomf
ort
sme
“
Whatwer
eyout
hinki
ng
Lwandl
elwenkosi
?Howcany
oupusha
pr
egnantgi
rl
?”
“
Zol
ekacal
m downpl
ease”Dadsay
s
t
ryi
ngt
ocal
m herdownbutmom i
s
hear
ingnone
“
Don’
ttel
lmet
ocal
m downBheki
!He
ki
l
ledourgr
andchi
l
d!Hi
sownchi
l
d!”My
hear
tbr
eaksi
nti
nypi
eces.Ibl
i
nkback
myt
ear
s
“
JesusZohowcany
ousayt
hatt
oour
sonhuh?What
’swr
ongwi
thy
out
hese
day
s!Youar
ebr
eat
hingf
ir
enj
e!He
madeami
stakeandwecan’
tdi
smi
ss
whatNandi
did!Whati
fthebabywas
notev
enLwandl
elwenkosi
’
s?”
“
WhatwasLwandl
edoi
ngwi
thher
phonei
nthef
ir
stpl
ace?
”
“
Doesi
tmat
ter
,what
’si
mpor
tanti
sthat
nowweknowt
hatNandi
can’
tbe
t
rust
ed!
”
“
OhcomeonBheki
justbecauseNandi
ent
ert
ainedaguyt
hatwant
sher
,she
can’
tbet
rust
ed.Angi
thi
yourson
doesn’
twanther
!”
“
Youar
emi
ssi
ngt
hepoi
nt!Het
oldMi
ra
aboutt
her
easonwhyLwandl
ewas
i
nter
est
edi
nheratf
ir
st.
”
“
Wast
hatal
i
e?”
“
Jesusar
eyousay
ingi
twasr
ightf
orher
t
osabot
aget
hei
rrel
ati
onshi
p?”
“
Ofcour
senotbutt
hepoi
nti
s,i
twasno
l
i
e.Lwandl
elwenkosi
play
edwi
thMi
ra’
s
hear
tfi
nishandkl
aarwhoorhowshe
f
oundouti
t’
sdoesn’
tmat
tert
hebot
tom
l
i
nei
sLwandl
ebr
okeherhear
t!Ican’
t
bel
i
evey
ouar
edef
endi
nghi
m aboutt
his!
Youar
eteachi
nghi
mtogoar
ound
br
eaki
nggi
rl
’shear
tsasi
ftheyar
enot
humansandt
heyhav
enof
eel
i
ngs,
at
t
heendoft
hedayt
heyar
eex
pect
edt
o
f
orgi
veandf
orgetbecauset
heyl
ove
hi
m.Theycan’
tev
eni
magi
net
oli
ve
wi
thouthi
m.Nomat
terhowheshat
ter
t
hei
rhear
tsi
ntopi
ecesbutbecauset
hey
l
ovehi
mtheywi
l
lst
il
lchoosehi
m abov
e
ev
ery
thi
ngar
gh!
”Shewal
ksaway
l
eav
ingmewonder
ingi
fshewasst
il
l
t
alki
ngaboutmeorwhat
.Thedoct
or
sai
dNandi
isst
il
lrest
ingsoIwi
l
lcome
backt
ocheckonherl
ater
.Ihopeshe
wi
l
lfor
giv
eme.Idi
dn’
tmeanal
loft
his
t
ohappen.
“
Dadwoul
dyoupl
easel
endmey
ourcar
andusemom.Iwi
l
lpi
ckherupwhen
sheknockof
f.Ihav
esomewher
etogo”
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
ToTshepo,
Ineedt
oknowi
fNandi
was
car
ryi
ngmychi
l
dornot
”
“
Idon’
tthi
nki
t’
sagoodi
deay
ouneedt
o
cal
m downf
ir
st.
”
“
Dadpl
ease,
I’
m cal
m”Heheav
esasi
gh
andgi
vesmehi
scarkey
s.
“
Thanky
oupops”Ir
eal
l
ymi
ssedt
his
si
deofdad,
weuset
obesocl
ose
bef
oreandhi
m suppor
ti
ngmei
nthi
s
whol
esi
tuat
ionwar
msmyhear
t.Imake
mywayoutanddr
ivet
oTshepo’
shouse.
“
Lwandl
e”
“
Youasshol
e!”Ipunchhi
mthemoment
heopenst
hedoorf
orme
“
Whatt
hef
uckman!
”
“
Ithoughtwewer
efr
iends!Ushel
a
ngami
shl
ama!Whydi
dn’
tyouj
ustask
heroutwi
thoutsabot
agi
ngmeand
Mi
ra?
”Ipunchhi
m agai
n
“
I’
m sor
rybr
abutIwashel
pingy
ou!She
want
edt
ocommi
tsui
cideIt
houghtof
somet
hingt
hatwi
l
lmakeherchangeher
mi
nd.Ihadt
ogi
vehert
hatv
ideot
ogi
ve
herhopet
haty
ouandhercanst
il
lbe
t
oget
her
!”
“
Youar
ely
ingy
ouwant
edt
osabot
age
meTshepo!
”
“
Iswearbr
a,Ihadt
odosomet
hing.I
admi
titwasawr
ongt
hingt
odobuti
t
gav
eherhopeandshedi
dn’
tcommi
t
sui
cide.Thatgi
rll
ovesy
ou
Lwandl
elwenkosi
andIdon’
tthi
nky
ou
wi
l
lev
erf
indsomeonewhowi
l
llov
eyou
l
i
keher
.”Ichuckl
e
“
Yety
ouar
easki
ngherout
?”
“
Yesbecauseshedeser
vesbet
ter
!She
deser
vessomeonewhocanl
oveher
.
Shehasbeent
hroughal
ot,
shedoesn’
t
deser
veal
lthi
spai
n.Sheshoul
dbeout
t
her
est
udy
ingl
i
keanyot
hert
eenagenot
si
tt
ingi
nyourhouseandnur
singher
pr
egnancywhi
l
eyouar
eoutt
her
e
bui
l
dingy
ourcar
eer
!”
“
YeTshepo,
arey
ouf
ucki
ngNandi
?”He
chuckl
esandl
ooksatmewi
thgr
imace
onhi
sface
“
Shoul
dsheheary
ousay
ingt
hatshe
woul
dbemor
ebr
okent
hanal
readyshe
i
s.Youbr
okeherv
irgi
nit
yLwandl
e,when
y
ouwer
eenoughwi
thhery
oudumped
herbecause“
shedi
dn’
thav
eti
mef
or
y
ou”asi
fyoudi
dn’
tknowt
hatshehad
t
otakecar
eofhersi
ckgr
andmot
her
.
St
il
lshel
ovedy
ouwi
thherbr
okenhear
t
andwhenshef
oundoutshe’
spr
egnant
y
out
oldhert
onott
ermi
nat
ebuty
ou
har
dlyhadt
imef
orher
.Youknewt
hat
shel
ovesy
oubuty
ouwer
efl
aunt
ing
y
ourr
elat
ionshi
pwi
thMi
rai
nfr
ontof
her
.Wasi
sitnecessar
ytobr
ingMi
ra
i
ntot
hehouseandf
uckherwhi
l
eNandi
wast
her
e?Nowy
ouhav
eaner
vet
oask
mei
fI’
mfucki
ngher
.Ev
eni
fIwas
f
ucki
ngher
,it
’snoneofy
ourbusi
ness.
Youl
oveMi
rar
ight
?Itmustbeni
cet
o
bey
ou,
cheeseboybr
eaki
nggi
rl
’shear
ts
andgetawaywi
thi
t.Getoutofmy
houseandnev
ersety
ourski
nnyass
her
e!”Outoft
he4ofusTshepohas
al
way
sbeenmybestf
ri
end,
inf
actwe
ar
eli
kebr
other
s.Heget
smeandIget
hi
m soIwon’
tli
etoy
ouandsaywhathe
j
ustsai
disnoteat
ingme.Iwal
koutwi
th
at
ail
bet
weenmyl
egsanddr
ivet
othe
hospi
tal
.Igost
rai
ghtt
oNandi
’
sroom
andf
indhercr
ying.Iwal
ktoherand
env
elopesheri
nmyar
ms
“
I’
m sor
ryNandi
,I
’mr
eal
l
ysor
ry”
“
Idi
dn’
twantt
obondwi
thherbecauseI
knewshewi
l
lleav
eme.I
thur
tsnowt
hat
she’
sdead,
may
beGodknewt
hatIwi
l
l
beabadmot
her
”
“
Not
hat
’snott
rue,
itwasmyf
aul
t.I
shoul
dn’
thav
epushedy
ou,
I’
m sor
ry”
“
Shewasgoi
ngt
oleav
emeany
way
,just
l
i
keev
ery
onedoes.Theyal
ll
eav
eme
l
i
keIdon’
tmat
teratal
l
.What
’swr
ong
wi
thmeLwandl
e?Am Ir
epul
siv
e?”
“
Noy
ouar
enot
”
“
Thenwhy
?Mom l
eftme,
youl
eftme,
gogol
eftme,
Innocentl
eftmenowi
t’
s
mybaby
”
“
Ther
e’snot
hingwr
ongwi
thy
ou,
Iswear
andI
’
m sor
ryt
haty
ouhadt
owi
tness
peopl
eex
iti
ngy
ourl
i
fel
i
ket
his.What
hur
tst
hemosti
sthatI
’
m oneoft
hose
peopl
eandal
socausedt
hedeat
hofour
chi
l
d.I
’
m sor
ryNandi
”
“
Whatam Igoi
ngt
odoLwandl
e,wher
e
wi
l
lIgonowt
hatI
’
m nol
ongercar
ryi
ng
y
ourchi
l
d?”
“
Igoty
ou,
don’
tcr
y”Tshepomademe
r
eal
i
zeI
’
m aj
erk,
Ihav
etodor
ightby
Nandi
.

“
Youf
lunkedagai
n!!
!”Heshr
iekswi
th
angercausi
ngmet
ojumpIcr
ossmy
f
inger
sthathedoesn’
tbeatmeup.I
knowt
hatIhav
edi
sappoi
ntedhi
m Ial
so
di
sappoi
ntedmy
sel
fbutcan’
the
under
standt
hatI
’
m goi
ngt
hroughal
ot
r
ightnowandi
tdoesn’
thel
pthatIhat
e
bcom account
ing.
“
I’
m sor
rydaddy
”
“
Nyor
y,y
ouar
ewast
ingmymoney
!Why
di
dyouf
ail
huh?Wer
eyoubusywi
th
boy
sandf
orgoty
ourst
udi
es!
”
“
Nodaddy
,Mi
rai
smi
ssi
ng,
it’
sbeen6
mont
hsandI
…”Icoul
dn’
thel
pbutbur
st
i
ntot
ear
s
“
Hai
sukawenanowt
hatMi
rai
smi
ssi
ng,
y
ourl
i
fehast
ost
op!Thepol
i
cear
e
l
ooki
ngf
orhert
heywi
l
lfi
ndher
!”How
i
nsensi
ti
veoft
hismanIcal
lmyf
ather
.I
l
ovehi
m,Ir
eal
l
ydobutIhat
ehowhe’
s
cont
rol
l
ingmyl
i
feandal
lmom say
sis
“
yourf
atheri
sdoi
ngwhat
’sbestf
ory
ou
baby
”Thatwomani
sdi
ckmi
ti
zedt
o
ev
ennot
icet
hatdadi
sacont
rol
freak.
“
Uzokhal
elai
ntooy
azi
yo!Thul
a
umsi
ndo!
”Icov
ermymout
hwi
thmy
handt
ryi
ngt
ost
opmysobsf
rom
escapi
ng.
“
Iwi
l
lgi
vey
out
hisl
astchance,
ify
ouf
ail
agai
nyouwi
l
lseewhatIam madeof
!”
Hewal
ksoutl
eav
ingmecr
ying.I
thas
beenadi
ff
icul
tmont
hsofmyl
i
fe.Ican’
t
st
opt
hinki
ngaboutmybestf
ri
end,
I
wonderi
fshe’
sokaywher
evershei
s.I
f
eel
hor
ri
blet
hatwhensheneededmeI
wasn’
tav
ail
abl
e.Theweekshe
di
sappear
edshewast
ryi
ngt
ogethol
d
ofmebutIbusyav
oidi
ngt
het
woboy
sI
f
oundmy
sel
fcaughti
nbet
weenoft
hem.
May
bei
fshef
oundmeshewoul
dbe
her
e.Isof
eel
li
keast
rangeri
nMi
ra’
s
l
i
feIt
houghtIknewev
ery
thi
ngabouther
,
t
hatwear
efr
iendsandweshar
e
ev
ery
thi
ngbuti
ttur
nsoutIknew
not
hing.Shenev
ert
oldmeherf
ather
wasabusi
nghermom andheoncebeat
herup.Ionl
yhearal
loft
hiswhenIwas
i
nKZNf
orMrKhumal
o’sf
uner
al.I
ov
erhear
dmom Bongat
alki
ngt
oAunt
y
Noma.Twoy
ear
sandMi
ranev
ersai
d
any
thi
ng?Don’
tgetmewr
ongbutt
hisi
s
maki
ngmequest
ionourf
ri
endshi
p.I
wi
shshecancont
actmeorsomet
hing,
I
r
eal
l
ymi
ssher
.It
’sast
ruggl
etohav
e
f
ait
hwhenday
skeeppassesby
.Si
x
mont
hsi
sal
ongt
imenow.If
eel
anar
m
wr
appi
ngar
oundmeandhersweet
scentf
il
lsmynost
ri
ls.
“
Shhdon’
tcr
ybaby
”
“
Mir
a’sdi
sappear
ancei
staki
ngahuge
t
oll
onme,
mom.
”
“
IknowbabyandI
’
m sosor
ry.Mi
rawi
l
l
bef
ound”
“
It
’sbeenSi
xmont
hsmom whati
fwe
nev
erf
indher
?”
“
Don’
tsayt
hat
,Godwi
l
lhearourpr
ayer
s.
Hewi
l
lbr
ingherbackt
oussaf
eand
sound.Wehav
etobel
i
evei
nhi
m”
“
Imi
sshersomuch”
“
I’
m sur
eshemi
ssesy
out
oobaby
”my
phoner
ingsIpul
lbackf
rom mom and
t
akesmyphonef
rom t
hebedsi
det
abl
e.
I
t’
sSox
,Mi
ra’
sdi
sappear
ancehas
br
oughtuscl
oseri
t’
ssur
pri
singr
eal
l
y
j
udgi
nghowwewer
eal
way
soneach
ot
her
’st
hroat
s.Hehasbeent
rav
eli
ng
ar
oundf
orsi
xmont
hssear
chi
ngf
or
Mi
raandt
hismont
hhe’
sher
einJoz
i.
“
Sox
”
“
Heyy
ougood?
”
“
I’
mtr
yingy
ou?
”
“
Met
oo.
..
Don’
tyouwantust
ogr
ab
somet
hingt
oeat
.”
“
Nopr
obl
em”
“
I’
m onmywayt
ofet
chy
ou”
“
Okay
”Ihangup
“
Wast
hatSox
?”
“
YesMom”
“
He’
sagoodguy
,youknow”
“
Wel
li
fyout
oldmet
hatwayback,
I
woul
dhav
elaughedaty
ou.Goshhe
wasal
way
sannoy
ingme”Shel
aughs
“
Yourf
atheruset
oannoymet
ooy
az”I
r
oll
myey
es.Whenwegother
e,Ihat
ed
i
tandi
tdi
dn’
thel
pthatmyex
-boy
fri
end
dumpedme.If
oundoutt
hatIwas
pr
egnantwhenIhadmi
scar
ri
age.Mom
wasv
erysuppor
ti
veofcour
sewedi
dn’
t
t
ell
dadbecausehewasgoi
ngt
oki
l
lme.
Si
ncet
henmom changed,
she’
sno
l
ongert
hatst
ri
ctmom.Ial
way
senv
ied
Mi
raf
orhav
ingamot
herl
i
kemom
Bongawho’
sver
yopenandcool
butmy
mi
scar
ri
agewasabl
essi
ngi
ndi
sgui
se.
Nowwet
alkaboutev
ery
thi
ngand
any
thi
ngIcoul
dn’
tbehappi
er.
“
Ofcour
se,
dadi
sannoy
ingmom”
“
Heywena,
that
’smyhusband!
”Ir
oll
my
ey
esagai
n
“
Soxi
sonhi
sway
,hewantust
ogr
ab
somet
hingt
oeat
”
“
Okayasl
ongasy
oudon’
tcomeback
l
ate”Wet
alkaboutr
andom t
hingsunt
il
Soxar
ri
ves.
“
Hey
”
“
Hel
l
o”Weshar
eahugt
henheopens
t
hedoorf
orme.Igeti
nthecar
,he
cl
osesi
tandgot
ohi
ssi
de.
“
Howdi
dev
ery
thi
nggo?
”
“
I’
mlosi
nghopeGuguhowcanshej
ust
v
ani
shwi
thoutat
race”Hesay
sst
art
ing
hi
scaranddr
iveof
f
“
Doy
out
hinkshe’
sdead?
”
“
Idon’
twantt
othi
nkt
hatGugupl
ease!
”
Hegr
oansandhol
dst
hest
eer
ingwheel
har
d.Mi
ra’
sdi
sappear
ancei
saf
fect
ing
ev
ery
onewhowascl
oset
oher
.Hepul
l
s
ov
ert
osomegr
il
l&pubandImustsay
t
hev
ibei
sref
reshi
ng.He’
sreal
l
yacool
guyt
ohangoutwi
thandev
eryt
imeI
spendt
imewi
thhi
m Ir
eal
i
zeMi
rawas
r
ightabouthi
m.Hemakesmel
augh
t
hroughoutourmeal
andaf
terourmeal
wehav
esomedr
ink.I
t’
sSat
urday
,no
school
formet
omor
rowsol
etmet
ryt
o
shutmymi
ser
yandenj
oy.
“
Youwannadance?
”IknowI
’
m dr
unk
whenIwantt
odance
“
Sur
ewhynot
”Wedancet
oget
hergoi
ng
wi
tht
her
hyt
hm oft
hemusi
c,he’
sal
soa
gr
eatdancer
.Hi
shandsar
eonmywai
st
If
eel
hisbul
geonmybut
twhi
chmakes
mypussyt
ocompl
ain.Imov
emywai
st
r
ubbi
ngmyassonhi
sbul
ge.Hegr
oans
andwhi
sper
sonmyear
“
Don’
tdot
hatpl
ease”
“
Whynot
”
“
Youwon’
tbeabl
etot
akei
t”
“
Ist
hatachal
l
enge?
”
“
Noi
t’
sthet
rut
h”
“
Let
’sgetoutofher
e”
HappyBi
rt
hdayPascal
i
nahNt
edi
seng
Mot
aung

CHAPTER31
Nandi
fal
lasl
eepi
nmyar
msIputher
downont
hebedandwal
kout
.Il
ookf
or
mymot
herandt
ell
hert
ocal
lmewhen
sheknockof
fandshesay
sIshoul
dn’
t
wor
ryshewoul
dcal
lanUber
.Idr
ive
homewi
tht
hought
sreel
i
ngmymi
nd.
I
’
m somi
ssi
ngmyDol
l
facebaki
thi
.I
can’
ttakei
tany
mor
e,i
t’
stoomuchnow.
Ther
e’sgr
oupofgi
rl
swal
ki
ngbyt
his
onewho’
swal
ki
ngal
onei
nfr
ontoft
hem
wi
thacaneont
hehandandwear
inga
y
ell
owdr
ess.Myhear
tski
psabeatIpul
l
ov
erandr
unt
othegr
oupofgi
rl
s
“
Mir
a!Dol
l
faceMi
rawai
tup!
”Igr
abher
handandsheshr
iekswi
thshock
“
I’
m sor
ryIt
houghti
t’
ssomeone.
”My
hear
tdr
opst
omyst
omachIr
eal
l
y
t
houghtI
t’
sher
.She’
sev
enwear
ingt
he
samey
ell
owdr
essMi
rahasandi
twas
herf
avour
it
e.Igeti
nmycarwi
tht
ear
s
bur
ningmyey
esanddr
ivehome.
“
Lwandl
e!”Scr
eamsSnot
hemomentI
wal
kin
“
Heymunchki
n”
“
Youf
oundMi
ra?
”myhear
tsi
nks
“
Nobaby
,I’
m sor
ry”
“
Whenwi
l
lyouf
indherLwandl
e,may
be
shedoesn’
twantusany
mor
e”She
bl
i
nksandhert
ear
sfal
l
.Icr
oucht
oher
hei
ghtandpul
lhert
omyar
ms
“
Mir
alov
eusmunchki
n,shewi
l
lal
way
s
wantus”
“
Uphi
kant
i?”
(Wher
eisshe?
)
“
Idon’
tknowbutIpr
omi
sewewi
l
lfi
nd
herokay
”shenodsherhead
“
Wher
e’sDad?
”
“
Wat
chi
ngt
v”Igetupandwal
ktol
i
ving
r
oom,
“
Pops”Isi
tdownnex
ttohi
m
“
Howdi
ditgo?
”
”
Itwasmybaby
”
“
I’
m sor
ryson”
“
Iwasl
ooki
ngf
orwar
dtobei
ngaf
ather
,
myhear
tissobr
okenDad”Hepul
l
sme
t
ohi
sar
ms.
“
Howi
sNandi
?”
“
She’
sbr
okenandwor
ri
edwewoul
d
ki
ckherout
”
“
Shehasnot
hingt
odowi
thusany
mor
e,
shemustgobackhome”
“
Shehasnoonedad,
please.Atl
east
f
indheraj
obaty
ourcompanysot
hat
shewi
l
labl
etor
entaf
latandt
akecar
e
ofher
sel
f”
“
EishLwandl
e,Ican’
tjusthi
..
..
”
“
Please,
I’
m beggi
ngy
ou”
“
Okayf
ine”
“
Thanky
ousomuchdad”Ihughi
m,I
f
eel
somuchbet
ternowknowi
ngt
hat
shewi
l
lhav
eaj
obandwi
l
lbeabl
eto
t
akecar
eofher
sel
f.

Themomentwear
ri
veathi
shot
elr
oom
wer
ipeachot
her
’scl
othesandhef
uck
t
hel
i
vingshi
toutofme.Ihav
enev
er
beenf
uckedl
i
ket
hisi
nmyl
i
fe!Damn
Sox
’ssexgamei
sonpoi
nt,
Iwoul
dn’
t
mi
ndhav
inghi
m any
timeIwanthi
m.
Whenwer
eachourcl
i
maxwef
all
asl
eep
wi
thmei
nhi
sar
ms.

-
Icanhearmyphoner
ingi
ngi
na
di
stancei
t’
sannoy
ingme.Igr
oanand
bl
i
nksmyheav
yey
esopenbef
orel
i
fti
ng
myheadup,
Igr
oanduet
oan
ex
cruci
ati
ngpai
ninmyhead.Igr
abmy
phonef
rom t
hecof
feet
abl
e.Lor
d!Ihav
e
nev
erseenaper
sonasst
ubbor
nasZo
i
nmyl
i
fe.Igr
oanandanswermyphone
“
Awusi
sabi
isi
dinamf
azi
”Shechuckl
es
“
Iwon’
tgi
veupony
ousi
s,y
ouwi
l
lhav
e
t
oki
l
lmef
ir
st.
”Ir
oll
myey
esIdon’
t
hav
est
rengt
htodot
his.Ihav
ebeen
doi
ngi
tforsi
xmont
hsev
erysi
ngl
eday
butshedoesn’
tli
sten.
“
Whatdoy
ouwantZo?
”
“
I’
m onmywayt
her
e”Isi
ghZoi
s
dr
aini
ngmyener
gyr
eal
l
y.
“
Okay
”Ihearherr
eleasi
ngasi
ghof
r
eli
ef.Ihangupandl
ookar
oundt
he
house,
it’
slooksv
erycl
ean.Idon’
t
r
emembercl
eani
ng,
Icl
osemyey
es
t
ryi
ngt
orecal
ltheev
ent
sofear
li
erbuti
t
pr
ovest
obeami
ssi
on.Igetupand
headt
otheki
tchent
omakesomet
hing
t
oeatI
’
m st
arv
ing.I
’
m wel
comedbya
smel
lofpi
zza.Iseeanot
epl
ast
eredon
t
hef
ri
dge.
‘
I
nthest
atet
hatIf
oundy
oui
n,Ir
eal
i
zed
t
haty
oumi
ghtnotr
ememberwhat
happened.Icamet
oseey
ouandy
ou
passedoutont
hecouchsoIdeci
dedt
o
cal
lcl
eani
ngser
vicet
ocl
eant
hehouse.
I
’
m sor
ryi
fthatwi
l
lmakey
ou
uncomf
ort
abl
e.Ial
soor
der
edpi
zza,
it’
s
i
nyourmi
crowav
e.K.
’It
aket
henot
e
andt
hrowi
tint
hebi
n.Ir
eal
l
ydon’
t
under
standhowpeopl
ecant
urny
our
l
i
feupsi
deandf
orcet
hemsel
vesi
nto
y
ourl
i
fe.Theyhav
edest
roy
edme,
especi
all
yKhuz
ani
.Mydaught
erandmy
husbandwoul
dbeher
eifi
twasn’
tfor
hi
sst
upi
drev
enge.Ir
emembert
he
secondweekhest
art
edt
her
apy
sessi
onsIcoul
dseet
hathewas
changi
ng.I
fonl
yhef
oundpr
operhel
p,
hewoul
dhav
echanged.Theyr
obbed
hi
m achancet
ochangeandbet
heman
hewant
edmet
opr
oudt
ocal
la
husbandandaf
atherofmydaught
er.
Hesawt
hel
i
ghtatt
heendbuthewas
nev
ergi
venachancet
ori
ghthi
swr
ongs.
Honest
lyt
her
ewer
eti
mesIt
houghtt
hat
hewoul
dki
l
lmebutnev
erhav
eI
t
houghtt
hatIwi
l
lbet
heonet
oki
l
lhi
m.
Onet
hingpeopl
edon’
tunder
standi
s
t
hatIcan’
trej
oiceonhi
sdeat
h.Howdo
y
our
ejoi
ceonki
l
li
ngt
heonewho
occupi
esy
ourhear
t?Inev
erwant
edhi
m
dead.Inev
erwant
edhi
m dead!Iwant
ed
hi
mtochangehi
sway
s,Iwant
edmy
Khumal
obackt
heonewhoIf
ell
inl
ove
wi
th.Iguesst
hatwast
oomucht
oask
becauseal
lIr
ecei
vedwasahear
tache
ofl
osi
ngbot
hofmyl
oveones.I
t’
snot
enought
hatmyhusbandi
sdead,
my
daught
eri
smi
ssi
ng.Ican’
tst
opt
hinki
ng
abouther
,ev
ery
thi
ngar
oundmej
ust
r
emi
ndsmeofher
.Itl
i
keIwi
l
lseeher
wal
tzi
ngi
ntomyhouseandscr
eam
“
mommy
!”Toomuchl
ostatt
hesame
t
ime,
Ifeel
li
ket
hisi
stooper
sonal
now,
t
hegodsort
heancest
orsar
epuni
shi
ng
me.Iopent
hemi
crowav
eandt
aket
he
pi
zza,
Iwonderhowheknewt
hat
somet
hingmeat
yismyf
avour
it
e.Zo
cal
l
smet
oopent
hegat
eforher
,justas
I
’
m aboutt
oindul
geonmypi
zza.Iopen
t
hegat
eforheraswel
last
hedoor
.The
momentshewal
ksi
nshesqueez
esme
i
ntoahug.
“
Imi
ssy
ousomuch”I
’
m notr
etur
ning
t
hehugbackunt
ilshepul
l
smeback
andl
ooksatmewi
thgl
i
steni
ngey
es.
“
I’
m sor
ryBonga,
Iwantt
obeher
efor
y
oupl
easest
opshut
ti
ngmeout
.
Honest
lyIhadnoknowl
edgeofmy
br
other
’spl
anspl
easedon’
tpuni
shme
f
orhi
smi
stakes.Il
ovey
ousomuchand
Iwantt
owal
kwi
thy
out
hrought
his
di
ff
icul
tjour
ney
.Youcanbemadatme
i
t’
sokay
,shoutatme,
punchmebutas
l
ongasy
oual
l
owmet
omet
obet
her
e
f
ory
ou.
”Theconcer
nlacedi
nherv
oice
t
ri
gger
smyt
ear
s,nowi
t’
smyt
urnt
o
squeez
eheri
ntomyar
ms.Ihav
ebeen
consumedwi
thanger
,gr
iefandpai
n
t
hatIpushedawayt
heonl
yper
sonwho
canbef
ull
ybeher
eformewi
thoutev
en
apr
icef
ort
hatmat
ter
.
“
I’
m her
e,Iwi
l
lal
way
sbeher
efory
ou”I
pul
lbackandshel
eadsmet
othel
i
ving
r
oom wher
eweset
tl
edown.
“
It
’sgoi
ngt
obeokay
,Iknowi
twi
l
l.God
wi
l
lnev
erf
orsakeusBonga.He’
s
wat
chi
ngusandMi
rawher
evershei
s.”
Shesay
sst
roki
ngmybackasI
’
m
pr
essedonherchest
.
“
I’
mlosi
nghopeZowhati
f…”
“
Don’
tsayt
hat
,she’
snotdead”
“
Ifonl
yIl
i
stenedt
oherZo,
Ihav
elost
countoft
imesshet
oldmet
oleav
e
Khumal
obutIdi
dn’
tli
steni
nst
eadI
sl
appedher
!”
“
Khumal
owast
hreat
eni
ngt
oki
l
lyou
bot
hBonga”
“
IknowbutIshoul
dhav
edone
somet
hing.Idon’
tknowwhatbutIwas
supposedt
odosomet
hing.Youknow
ourl
astf
ightIcal
l
edherst
upi
dbl
i
ndgi
rl
Zowhatki
ndofamot
herIam?I
’
m sur
e
ev
eni
fshewantt
ocomebackshewon’
t
becausei
nst
eadofl
i
fti
ngherupIwas
pul
l
ingherdown.Shesai
dev
eryt
ime
shehadt
osuf
ferbecauseoft
he
deci
sionsImakeandi
t’
str
ue.Wear
e
her
ebecauseofme!Becauseoft
hebad
deci
sionsImade.May
beshe’
sbet
ter
wi
thoutmeZo”
“
OhBongat
hat
’snott
ruenoonecan
under
standbet
terwhaty
ouhav
ebeen
t
hrought
heny
our
sel
f.Wecant
alkand
t
alkunt
ilourmout
hsex
pandsbutt
he
t
rut
hisy
ouar
etheonewhoknowswhat
y
ouhav
ebeent
hrough.I
fwehav
enev
er
wal
kami
l
einy
ourshoeswecanonl
y
i
magi
newhaty
ouhav
ebeent
hrough.
Mi
naIbel
i
eveev
erydeci
siony
oumade
y
ouknewi
twasf
ort
hebest
.Pl
ease
st
opbei
nghar
dony
our
sel
f.IknowMi
ra
l
ovesy
ouandt
her
e’snot
hingshewant
t
hent
obewi
thhermommy
.Thatgi
rl
l
ovesy
ouBonga,
thebondt
haty
out
wo
shar
edwassobeaut
if
ult
owat
ch.Don’
t
ev
ert
hinkt
hatshe’
sbet
terwi
thouty
ou
becausey
ouar
eal
lshewant
s.I
’
m sur
e
i
fsheknewt
haty
ouar
eal
i
veand
Khumal
oisdeadshewoul
dhav
emade
cont
actwi
thanyofus,
Lwenkosi
or
Gugu.It
hinkwher
evershei
s,shet
hink
y
oudi
edandKhumal
oisl
ooki
ngf
orher
t
oki
l
lher
.Ist
rongl
ybel
i
evet
hatwewi
l
l
f
indher
.Godwi
l
lshowushi
sgr
eat
ness
j
ustwat
chandsee”If
eel
ahi
ntofhope
engul
fi
ngme.Ioncesai
dZo’
scompany
i
smol
l
ify
ing,
shebr
ingssenseof
t
ranqui
l
li
tyandhopei
nonel
i
fe’
s.Ipul
l
backandwi
pemyt
ear
s.
“
Thanky
ousomuch”
“
Any
timesi
s,any
time”
“
I’
m st
arv
ingy
ourbr
otherboughtmea
pi
zza.Idi
dn’
tcook,
Ihopey
oudon’
t
mi
ndasl
i
ce”
“
Iwi
l
lgogeti
tsi
ther
eandr
elax
”
“
Aren’
tyoucomi
ngf
rom wor
kyoumust
bet
ir
ed”
“
Iam butt
aki
ngapi
zzaf
rom ki
tcheni
s
not
hing”Shesay
sget
ti
ngupt
henhead
out
.It
aket
her
emot
eandswi
tchont
he
t
v.Zocomesbackwi
thpi
zzaand
gl
assesofj
uice.
“
Iwantv
odka”
“
Hay
inomor
evodka,
I’
m sur
eyouhad
enought
oday
”
“
Howdoy
ouknow?Ohy
ourbr
othert
old
y
ou”Shesi
tsdownandwei
ndul
ge
“
Nohedi
dn’
t,
youar
ereeki
ngofal
cohol
Bonga”Thedi
sappr
oval
inherv
oicei
s
l
oud.
“
It
’snumbst
hepai
nZo”
“
Youar
est
rongert
hant
hisBongay
ou
needt
ofi
ght
”Ij
ustnodwi
thmyhead.
“
CanIsl
eepov
er”Il
ookatherandsee
somet
hingpassesherf
acebutI
’
m
unabl
etopoi
ntoutwhati
tis
“
Okaybutwhyi
fImayask”
“
Youneedcompany
”She’
sly
ingt
ome
“
Youar
ely
ingwhati
sitZo”Sheheav
es
asi
ghandl
ooksatme
“
Nandi
lostt
hebabyt
oday
”Igasp
“
OhI
’
m sor
ryIknowt
hepai
nbut
shoul
dn’
tyoubehomecomf
ort
ingher
?”
“
She’
sst
il
latt
hehospi
tal
”
“
Lwandl
eyena,
I’
m sur
eheneedsy
ou”
“
It
’shi
sfaul
tloy
o”Sheex
plai
nswhat
happened
“
Godt
hat
’shor
ri
bleZobutIt
hinky
ou
ar
etoohar
shonLwandl
e.I
’
m sur
ehe
di
dn’
tmeant
opushher
.Itwasa
mi
stake.Theboyi
sgoi
ngt
hroughal
ot
Zo,
heneedsy
ou”
“
Idon’
twantt
obehomeBonga.I
’
m
sor
rycanIbesel
fi
shf
oronceandnur
se
myf
eel
i
ngs”Isi
ght
hisi
sget
ti
ngser
ious
now
“
Whywhat
’shappeni
ng”Shel
ooksdown
andt
ear
sdr
opsdownherf
ace
“
Zot
alkt
ome”Il
i
ftupherchi
nwi
thmy
f
ingermaki
nghert
olookatme
“
He’
soutBongaandhecamet
oseeme.
Idon’
tunder
standhowhecanbeoutso
qui
ckl
y!
”I’
m notgr
aspi
ngwhatshe’
s
say
ingandIt
hinkshenot
icet
hen
cont
inues
“
Themant
hatr
apedme.Hei
soutofj
ail
,
howcant
heyr
eleasehi
m soqui
ckl
y.He
hadbeenl
ockedf
orl
i
kewhat4y
ear
s
sekaphumi
l
eaf
terwhathedi
dtome.He
scar
redmef
orl
i
feI
’
m st
il
ltr
yingt
odeal
wi
tht
hepai
nheputmet
hrough.
”Shel
et
outasob,
thi
sishear
t-
breaki
ng
“
OhZoI
’
m sor
ry”Iputt
hepl
atesandour
gl
assesont
hecof
feet
abl
eandhugher
“
Bast
ard,
whatdi
dhewantf
rom y
ou?
”
“
Hesai
dhewant
edt
oapol
ogi
ze,
Iwas
soscar
edBongabutIknewhewoul
dn’
t
doany
thi
ngt
omesi
ncewewer
eatt
he
hospi
tal
”
“
Apol
ogi
ze?Thener
ver
hhaaa,
you
apol
ogi
zewheny
oumadeami
stake!
Whathedi
dwasnotami
stake!
!!
”
“
Youknow,
seei
nghi
m br
oughtbackt
he
pai
nIwentt
hrough.NowwhenIl
ookat
Bheki
,If
eel
myangerr
enewi
ngt
owar
ds
hi
m.Hecausedmesomuchpai
nBonga.
If
indmy
sel
faski
ngi
fIev
ermadear
ight
deci
sionf
orst
ayi
ngaf
tert
hepai
nheput
met
hrough.
”
“
Hewasgr
iev
ingZo,
henev
ermeantt
o
hur
tyou”
“
Iwasal
sogr
iev
ingBonga.Thatman
wasl
i
keaf
athert
omet
oobutIdi
dn’
t
f
indsol
acei
not
hermen’
sdi
cks.Hei
s
t
heonet
hatwentoutt
her
eandf
ucked
ar
ound.Whatwast
heuseofmar
ryi
ng
mei
fhecoul
dn’
tshar
ehi
spai
nwi
th
me?
”Isi
ghIf
eel
herpai
n
“
Iunder
standhowy
ouar
efeel
i
ngsi
s
andI
’
m sor
ryf
orev
ery
thi
ngheputy
ou
t
hrough.Youknowpeopl
egr
iev
e
di
ff
erent
ly”
“
Ift
hat
’st
hecaset
henIshoul
dbe
wor
ri
edke.Whati
fhi
smot
herdi
es,
wil
l
hebehav
ethesame?
”
“
Hedi
dn’
tbehav
ethatwaywheny
ou
l
osty
ourson”Shebr
eat
hesoutl
oudl
y
“
Truebuti
sher
eal
l
ywor
thmy
f
orgi
venessandl
oveBongaaf
terwhat
heputust
hrough?
”
“
Hav
eyouev
erasky
our
sel
fthi
sory
ou
ar
eonl
yquest
ioni
ngy
our
sel
fnowt
hat
y
ousawt
hatman?
”
“
NoIhav
enev
eraskedmy
sel
fthat
,it
’s
onl
ynowt
hatIsawt
hisman”
“
Thent
her
e’sy
ouransweri
nal
loft
his
st
handwasami
.Seei
ngt
hatbast
ard
t
ooky
oubackt
othatencount
eragai
n
andy
ouhadt
oomuchofemot
ionst
o
deal
wit
hatonce.Hei
stheonet
hat
t
ri
gger
edal
loft
hisdoubtand
uncer
tai
nty
.Don’
tal
l
owhi
mtot
akeov
er
y
ourl
i
fe,
don’
tal
l
owhi
mtowi
n.Youar
e
awar
ri
orZoandwar
ri
orsnev
ergi
veup
t
heypul
lthr
oughnomat
terhowt
hor
ny
i
t’
sget
s.”Af
tercomf
ort
ingeachot
her
wedeci
det
ocooksuppert
oget
herj
ust
t
okeepbusywhi
l
eengagi
ngona
conv
ersat
ion.Ir
eal
l
ymi
ssedmoment
s
l
i
ket
hiswi
thherwel
lex
ceptt
hepar
t
t
hatshe’
shav
ingwi
newhi
l
eshe’
snot
al
l
owi
ngmet
odr
inkmyv
odka.Thi
s
womant
hinksshe’
smymot
hery
az.The
nex
tmor
ningIwakeupal
onewi
tha
not
e‘Goneear
ly,
Ineededsomecl
othes
t
ochangebef
oregoi
ngt
owor
k.Idi
dn’
t
wantt
owakey
ouup.Yourbr
eakf
asti
s
i
nthemi
crowav
epl
ease,
please,
please
I
’
m beggi
ngy
ouBongadon’
tdr
ink
al
cohol
.Hav
eagr
eatday
’It
akemy
phoneandcal
lthedet
ect
ivewhoi
s
handl
i
ngMi
ra’
scaseandhet
ell
sme
t
heywi
l
lcont
actmei
ftheyf
ind
somet
hing.Whatabunchofusel
ess
pol
i
ce!NowI
’
mthi
nki
ngmay
beSpi
deri
s
pay
ingt
hem t
onotl
ookf
ormydaught
er.
Ev
ery
oneknowswhathappened
bet
weenKhumal
oandIandSpi
der
doesn’
tbel
i
evei
twassel
f-
def
ence.He
say
sIki
l
ledhi
m pur
posel
ybecauseI
want
edt
oinher
ital
lKhumal
o’sr
iches.I
t
br
eaksmyhear
tbecauseIhonest
ly
t
houghtwegetal
ongbutnowIseet
hat
hi
sloy
alt
yiswi
thKhumal
o.Idon’
tev
en
f
eel
saf
ewhati
fhe’
spl
anni
ngt
oav
enge
Khumal
obutIt
hinksi
xmont
hsi
t’
slong
hewoul
dhav
edonebynow.Ir
oll
outof
bedandgot
othebat
hroom t
otakea
shower
.OnceI
’
m done,
Ipul
lonar
obe.
Mel
anchol
ydescentonmeasInot
ice
t
hatMi
ra’
ssweetscenti
nthi
sroom i
s
subsi
dingsl
owl
ybutsur
ely
.Ial
way
s
sl
eepi
nherbedr
oom nowj
ustt
ofeel
cl
osert
oher
.Thesayamot
hercan
sensewhensomet
hingi
snotr
ightwi
th
herchi
l
dandsof
arIhav
en’
tsense
any
thi
ng.Letmehol
dont
othat
.Imake
mywayt
otheki
tchent
ohav
emy
br
eakf
astwi
thagl
assofwi
ne.Iwi
l
llose
mymi
ndIneedt
odi
str
actmy
sel
f.
Someoneatt
hegat
edi
stur
bsmei
n
mi
ddl
eofmybr
eakf
ast
.Iwel
comet
he
t
wowomen,
anol
dmanand10chi
l
dren
“
Comei
n”Thet
wowomenar
eroami
ng
t
hei
rey
esar
oundmyki
tchen
“
Mommyi
sthi
swher
ewoul
dbest
ayi
ng
now?
”Askst
hel
i
ttl
eboyt
othewoman
“
Yesbaby
”Thewoman’
sresponse
l
eav
esmeper
plex
ed
“
It
’sbi
gandbeaut
if
ulmommy
.Lookat
t
hef
ri
dgeI
’
m sur
ether
e’sf
ood”
“
Ilov
eital
readyIwi
l
lbet
hef
ir
stt
o
chooset
her
oom!
”Say
sanot
herl
i
ttl
e
boy
“
Yhoomi
naI
’
m st
arv
ing”al
i
ttl
egi
rl
chi
rpsi
nasshet
akesmybr
eakf
aston
t
hecount
erandeat
.Theot
herki
dst
ryt
o
t
aket
hef
oodf
rom herandt
heyal
l
scr
eam andf
ightov
ermybr
eakf
ast
.I’
m
j
ustl
ooki
ngatt
hem shocked
“
Stopi
tni
namaan!
”Thewomany
ell
s
andt
heki
dsst
opf
ight
ing.I
’
m sur
pri
sed
t
hatwi
thi
nasecondt
heyhav
eat
eal
lmy
f
ood.
“
HowcanIhel
py’
al
l”
“
Awskoni
youar
enotev
engoi
ngt
o
of
ferusaseat
”Skoni
huh?
“
I’
m sor
rycomet
hissi
de”wegot
othe
l
i
vingr
oom andset
tl
eont
hecoucht
he
ki
dssi
tsont
hef
loorIl
ookatt
hem i
n
ant
ici
pat
ion.
“
Ehndodakaz
i,I
’
m Mt
hunz
iKhumal
o,
Vusi
muz
i’
sfat
her
,thesear
emy
daught
ersVusi
muz
i’
ssi
ster
swi
tht
hei
r
chi
l
dren”I
’
m st
unnedt
ospeakwhatar
e
t
heyar
edoi
ngher
e?Di
dtheyal
way
s
knowwher
eKhumal
oli
ves?Whyar
e
t
heyher
enow?
“
Oh”i
t’
sal
lImanaget
osay
“
Yesweknowt
hatmysonpassedaway
hencewear
eher
e…”Thesi
stercutt
he
f
atherof
f
“
Dadst
opbeat
ingar
oundt
hebushand
t
ell
hert
hatweknowsheki
l
ledour
br
othersoshemustt
akeherr
agsand
getoutofher
e!”Il
augh
“
What
?”
“
Youhear
dus,
leav
e.Weownev
ery
thi
ng
mybr
otherhadnowsowena
awusphumel
enj
e!”
“
I’
m hi
swi
fe…”Theot
hersi
stercut
sme
of
f
“
Uwumf
azi
wephephawena,
ababaphansi
bakaKhumal
oabakwaz
i!
Uf
ananent
ombi
nje!
!Wear
eher
enow
si
stot
akecar
eofev
ery
thi
ngourbr
other
ownsandy
ouwon’
tst
opus!Ki
dsgo
pi
ckupy
ourr
ooms!
”Theki
dsscr
eams
andr
unsar
oundt
hehouset
otel
lyou
I
’
m sur
pri
sedi
t’
sanunder
stat
ement
.
“
Getout
!”Thebot
hsi
ster
spul
l
smeup
andpushesmeout
“
Leav
emet
hef
uckal
one,
thi
sismy
house!
!”
“
Phuma!
!”(
Getout
)
“
It
’snoty
ourhouse,
it’
sourbr
other
syou
hav
enot
hingwena!
”Theypushesme
bef
oreIf
all
downst
rongar
mscat
ches
me.Il
ookupathi
m buthe’
slooki
ngat
t
heset
wobi
tchesbef
oreus
“
Whati
sgoi
ngonher
e!”It
ryt
otal
kbutI
getemot
ional
andcr
y
”
Bongat
alkt
ome!
”
“
Hambaaaal
anondi
ndwaubul
ale
umf
ethuwena!
”(Gosl
uty
ouki
l
ledour
br
other
)
“
Niy
any
a!Bongai
snotgoi
ngany
wher
e,
y
ouar
etheoneswhoshoul
dvacat
e
t
hesehousenow!Mf
ethuwamasi
mba
wher
ewer
eyoual
lal
onghuh?Di
dn’
tyou
r
unawaywi
thy
ourmenandl
efthi
m
al
one?Don’
ty’
al
ldar
ecomeher
ewi
th
mf
ethu,
mfet
huasi
fyoucar
edabout
hi
m!Youdi
dn’
tcar
e!Youhav
ethener
ve
t
ocomeher
eaf
teral
lthi
syear
sand
cl
aim hi
sri
chesknowi
ngt
haty
ou
abandonedhi
m wi
tht
hatabusi
vei
diot
y
oucal
laf
ather
.Getoutnowbef
oreI
cal
lthepol
i
ce!
!!
”Theyj
umpwi
thf
ri
ght
andcal
lthei
rki
dswi
thi
nsecondst
hey
ar
eoutwi
thal
lthei
rsui
tcaseswi
thno
quest
ionasked.
“
Arey
ouokay
”Ist
artcr
yingal
lov
er
agai
n
“
I’
m sor
ry”Heengul
fsmei
nhi
sar
ms.
“
May
beIshoul
dhav
ejustwal
kedaway
andal
l
owt
hem t
ost
ayher
e.I
t’
sthei
r
br
other
’shouseaf
teral
lKhuz
ani
”
“
Hay
ithi
sisy
ourhouseNokubonga,
don’
tal
l
owt
hesepeopl
etor
oby
ouof
f.
Wher
ewer
etheyal
lal
ong?Theywoul
d
nev
erwi
nev
eni
ftheycant
akey
out
o
cour
tbutIdoubtt
heywoul
dev
engo
t
hatf
ar.Theyar
eidi
otswhower
etr
ying
t
hei
rlucks.Ar
eyousur
etheydi
dn’
thur
t
y
ou?
”Ishakemyheadagai
nsthi
schest
“
I’
m sor
ryIwon’
tal
l
owt
hem t
odoas
t
heypl
easewi
thy
ou”Hesay
sst
roki
ng
myback
•
………………….
..
..
..
4year
s
l
ater
……….
…………….
•
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayLwet
huKana&
Li
zel
l
eDebei
l
aandHappyBi
rt
hday
Nonj
abul
oMhl
ongo&Si
phokuhl
e
Ngcwama

CHAPTER32

If
eel
star
esasI
’
m doi
ngmymor
ning
wor
kout
.Thi
shasbeengoi
ngonf
or
qui
teasomet
imenowbutInev
erget
usedi
t.I
t’
smaki
ngwor
kingout
,har
d
anduncomf
ort
abl
e“I
t’
shi
m!Ohhmy
GodLookatt
hoseabs!
”“Icoul
dhav
e
hi
m any
time!br
eakf
ast
,lunch,
dinner
!”
“
He’
seat
abl
emaangr
rr!
”“Let
’sgoask
f
orasel
fi
e”“
comeongi
rl
she’
swor
king
out
”“ohno,
I’
m notmi
ssi
ngt
his
oppor
tuni
ty”Iseet
hreegi
rl
scomi
ng
t
owar
dsmet
hrought
hemi
rr
or.Iswi
vel
ar
oundt
olookatt
hem
“
HeyLwandl
e!”Theyal
lsayatonce
“
Hel
l
oladi
es”t
heygi
ggl
e,I
’
m notsur
e
whatamusi
ngbuthey
.
“
Wear
esor
ryt
odi
stur
b,canwepl
ease
t
akef
ewsnapswi
thy
ou”Theydon’
t
wai
tformet
oagr
ee,
twogi
rl
sar
e
pr
essedonmysi
deswhi
l
etheot
herone
i
staki
ngapi
ctur
eofusmi
ndy
ouI
’
m
dr
ippi
ngwetwi
thmysweatasIwas
wor
kingout
.Theyt
aket
urnsandt
hey
ar
esoex
cit
edwhi
l
eIcan’
twai
tfort
hem
t
ofi
nish.Idon’
tfeel
comf
ort
abl
e
r
ubbi
ngmysweatont
hem butdot
hey
car
eno!
“
Thanky
ousomuch”
“
Pleasecal
lme”shewi
nksatmeasshe
handsmeapi
eceofpaper
.Il
ookat
t
hem ast
heywal
kout
.
“
Itmustbeni
cebei
ngy
ou,
hey
”Say
s
Nt
ando,
theowneroft
hegy
m,wel
lI
deci
dedt
odosomet
hingwi
thmyski
nny
bodyandbui
l
dsomemuscl
es.I
t’
sbeen
t
woy
ear
snowImustsayI
’
mimpr
essed
wi
tht
her
esul
ts.
“
Fucky
ou!
”Hel
aughs,
heknowshow
uncomf
ort
abl
eiti
sformet
owor
kout
whensucht
hingshappens
“
Butser
iousl
ybr
a,gi
rl
sar
ethr
owi
ng
t
hemsel
vesaty
oul
eftr
ightandcent
er,
y
ouknowt
hat
'sev
eryguy
swi
sh”
“
Trustmei
t’
snotasgoodasy
out
hink.
Thi
sot
herdayIwasatt
hemal
landI
want
edt
odonumber2soIwentt
othe
t
oil
et,
themomentmybut
tcamei
n
cont
actwi
tht
het
oil
etseatt
hedoor
swungopen.Somegi
rlaskedf
orasel
fi
e,
l
i
ker
eal
l
y?”Hebr
eaksi
ntol
aught
er
“
Don’
tlaughman”
“
Whatdi
dyoudo?
”
“
DudeIwasj
ustshockedsomeguy
s
askedhert
owai
tformeout
side
becauseshewasn’
tsupposet
obei
na
mal
est
oil
eti
nthef
ir
stpl
acebutt
hegi
rl
r
efused.Shewasescor
tedbyt
he
secur
it
ies,
scr
eami
ngherl
ungsout“
I
wantmyLwandl
e!Leav
emeal
one,
I
wantmybae!
”YhooNt
andomf
ethut
his
cel
ebr
it
ythi
ngi
shar
dwor
k”He’
sin
st
it
chest
hatt
ear
sar
erol
l
ingdownhi
s
f
ace
“
IfIwer
eyou,
Iwoul
dhav
ebentherov
er
andf
uckherhar
d,obv
iousl
yshewant
ed
y
ourdi
ck”
“
Youar
esi
ckwena.Let
’smakeadeal
,I
wi
l
ldoubl
etr
ipl
ethemoney
”
“
OkayI
’
mli
steni
ng”
“
Letmeuset
hegy
m af
terwor
kinghour
s
whenev
ery
onei
sgonesot
hatIcan
hav
emypeaceanddomywor
kout
s
wi
thoutdi
stur
bance”
“
Nopr
obl
em man”
“
Thanky
ousomuchbr
a”
“
Any
time”Webumpf
ist
sthenIt
akemy
spor
tbagandbot
tl
edwat
er
“
Tomor
row”
“
Sur
e”IheadoutwhenIgett
othe
par
kingl
ot,
Itakeoutmycarkey
sfr
om
t
hespor
tbagandunl
ockmycar
.It
hrow
myspor
tbagi
nthebackseatr
ightaf
ter
Igoti
nthecar
.Ist
artmycaranddr
ive
homepl
ayi
ngf
lashl
i
ghtbyJessi
eJ.I
t’
s
unbel
i
evabl
ethati
t’
sbeen4y
ear
ssi
nce
myDol
l
facedi
sappear
edbutst
il
lwe
hav
en’
tfoundher
.It
’sbeenv
erysoul
l
ess
4y
ear
sofmyl
i
feespeci
all
ythef
ir
stt
wo
y
ear
swer
ethehar
dest
.Icoul
dn’
tdeal
wi
thherdi
sappear
ancet
hatIr
esor
tto
cocai
ne,
Iwant
edt
odr
if
tawayf
rom
r
eal
i
tyunt
ilt
hedayIov
erdosed.Iwoke
upi
nhospi
tal
,tot
ell
yout
het
rut
hI
wi
shedInev
erwokeupbutseei
nghow
hear
tbr
okenmyf
ami
l
ywas,
Ireal
i
zet
hat
Ihav
etobest
rongnomat
terhowhar
dit
i
s.Iwentt
orehabandl
ear
ntt
oli
ve
wi
thoutherev
ent
houghi
twashar
d.I
mi
ssedherev
erysi
ngl
eday
,Imi
ssed
herj
oyf
ulgi
ggl
es,
Imi
ssedherherey
es,
Imi
ssedhersof
tli
ps,
Imi
ssedher
ki
ssesandhugs,
Imi
ssedheri
nnocence,
Imi
ssedherv
oice,
Imi
ssedhert
ouch,
I
mi
ssedathowshewasj
eal
ousabout
Nandi
,Imi
ssedbur
yingmy
sel
fdeepi
nto
her
,Imi
ssedherscent
.Thescentonher
hoodi
ehaswor
noutnowi
t’
sbr
eaksmy
hear
t.Ist
il
lmi
ssherev
ennow.Iwonder
i
fshe’
sal
i
vewher
evershei
s,she’
s
t
hinki
ngaboutmeasmuchasIdo
abouther
?Shemi
ssesmeasmuchasI
domi
ssher
?Ofcour
senot
,Ibr
okeher
hear
tmay
beshef
oundher
sel
fagood
guy
.Si
gh!Thi
nki
ngaboutt
hishasi
tway
ofdepr
essi
ngmeandIdon’
twantt
hat
becauseonceIgot
othatdar
khol
eit
’s
har
dtocl
i
mbout
.Iar
ri
veathomeand
gr
abmyspor
tbagbef
orest
eppi
ngout
oft
hecar
.If
indmom andSnomaki
ng
br
eakf
ast
.
“
Mor
ningmyf
avor
it
eladi
es”Iki
ss
mom’
sfor
eheadandwhenIgot
oSno
sher
unsaway
“
EwwwLwandl
elwenkosi
yousmel
l
ing
sweat
!”Igi
ggl
ethi
schi
l
d!
“
Mxm uy
aphapha”
“
Yougoodmom?
”
“
Yesbabywhatabouty
ou?
”
“
I’
m good”
“
Gohav
eashowert
henj
oinusf
or
br
eakf
ast
”Inodandmakemywayt
omy
bedr
oom.It
hrowt
hespor
tbagont
he
bedanduncl
othedbef
oregoi
ngt
othe
bat
hroom.OnceI
’
m donewi
thmy
hy
gienepr
ocessIgetdr
essedt
henj
oin
t
hef
ami
l
ywi
thbr
eakf
ast
.
“
Pops”
“
Son”Webumpf
ist
s.Ourr
elat
ionshi
pis
backt
owhati
tuset
obef
oreandI
’
m so
gr
atef
ul.Isi
tdownandmom di
shesup
f
ormet
henhandsmemypl
ate.
“
Dadhowf
arar
eyourpl
answi
thmaki
ng
t
heot
herguestr
oom agy
m”
“
Tal
ktoy
ourmom”Il
ookatmom asI
t
ossapi
eceofbaconi
nmymout
h
“
Hay
iwhat
’swr
ongwi
tht
hegy
myougo
t
o”
“
Gir
lsar
eal
lov
erhi
m,aski
ngf
orsel
fi
es”
Dadsay
schuckl
i
ng.
“
What
’swr
ongwi
tht
hat
”mom asks
whi
chmakesmydadl
aughs
“
Theyar
emaki
ngi
thar
dformet
odo
mywor
kout
s”
“
I’
m sor
rymyboyt
hesear
ethe
packagest
hatcomesoutbei
nga
cel
ebr
it
y”
“
Idi
dn’
tsi
gnedupf
ort
his”Theyal
l
l
aughatmeasi
fI’
m st
upi
d.Il
oveact
ing,
Ir
eal
l
ydobutIdon’
tthi
nkIpr
epar
ed
my
sel
fenoughf
ort
hisf
amei
t’
sgett
oo
muchsomet
imes.Si
nceIhadt
ogot
o
r
ehabmyst
udi
eshadt
obeputonhol
d
f
ort
hatper
iodbutst
udy
ingatAFDAhad
i
tsper
ks.AFDAhasanex
tensi
ve
net
wor
kofal
umni
int
hemov
iebusi
ness
whoownt
hei
rowncompani
es,
produce
andper
for
mincommer
cial
s,t
elev
isi
on
cont
ent
,li
veev
ent
sandf
eat
uref
il
ms.
AFDAgr
aduat
esof
tenempl
oyot
her
AFDAgr
aduat
es.I
t’
sbeenf
ewmont
hs
si
nceImadei
tont
hescr
eensIdon’
t
knowi
fIshoul
dsayIwasl
uckyor
bl
essedt
hatmyf
ir
str
olei
ntvhadt
obe
amai
nchar
act
eroft
hisnewdr
ama
cal
l
edI
sif
ungowhi
chi
skeepi
ng
ev
ery
onegl
uedt
othei
rscr
eens.I
t’
sa
r
eal
l
ygr
eatdr
amapeopl
ereal
l
ylov
eit
ev
enmyuncl
e,who’
snotat
vfani
s
wat
chi
ngi
t.Weeatbr
eakf
astov
erwar
m
chat
terandonceIf
ini
shIt
ell
them I
’
m
of
f
“
Youhav
eashoott
oday
?”Mom asks
“
NoI
’
m goi
ngt
omom Bonga”
“
Youar
ereal
l
yser
iousaboutt
his?
”
“
Yesmom”Shesmi
l
esf
aint
ly
“
Youhav
emysuppor
tinev
ery
thi
ngmy
son”
“
Minet
oo”Dadsay
s,Ismi
l
eIl
ovemy
f
olks
“
Youar
eguy
sar
esosweet
ngi
yani
thanda”
“
Wel
ovey
out
oobaby
”Imakemyway
outanddr
ivet
omom Bonga’
shouse.
I
’
m ner
vousIwon’
tli
etoy
ou.Sheopens
t
hedoorandsmi
l
eswhensheseesme
“
Lwandl
ecomei
n”Imakemywayi
n
“
SawbonaMama”
“
Hel
l
omyboyhowar
eyou”
“
I’
m wel
lthanksandy
ou?
”
“
I’
m br
eat
hingboy
,I’
m br
eat
hing.
.come
t
hissi
de”If
oll
owherbehi
nd.I
t’
sbeen
har
dforhert
oo,
she’
sanal
cohol
i
c,
mom anduncl
etr
iedt
omakeherqui
t
butt
heydi
dn’
tsucceed.Youknowi
n
si
tuat
ionsl
i
ket
hist
heper
soni
stheone
t
hatneedt
oreal
i
zef
ir
stt
hatheorshe
needshel
p.Youcan’
tfor
cet
hem,
just
l
i
keIr
eal
i
zedt
hepai
nIwasput
ti
ng
f
ami
l
ythr
oughanddeci
dedt
ost
op
doi
ngdr
ugsandf
indawayt
oli
ve
wi
thoutmyDol
l
face.Weset
tl
eont
he
couch,
shel
ooksatmei
nant
ici
pat
ion
asIr
ubmypal
mst
oget
her
.I’
m so
f
ucki
ngner
vousI
’
m sur
eshecansee
t
hat
.
“
Whatbr
ingsy
ouher
emf
anakaNkosi
”I
chuckl
etr
yingt
oeasemyner
ves
“
Umm mamaIdon’
tknowhowt
osay
t
his”
“
Ibekei
hlaz
ainj
aloboy
”(Tel
li
tli
kei
tis
boy
)
“
YouknowIl
ovey
ourdaught
ersomuch,
t
her
e’snodayt
hatpasseswi
thoutme
t
hinki
ngabouther
.Youknowhowhar
d
i
tasbeenf
ormedeal
wit
hher
di
sappear
ancebutt
hroughGod’
sgr
aceI
l
ear
ntt
oli
vewi
tht
hisv
acancyi
nmy
hear
tandunanswer
edquest
ions.I
’
m
notsay
ingt
hist
ohur
tyouandt
o
di
srespecty
oubutIneedy
ourbl
essi
ngs
t
omov
eon.
”Ther
e’samomentof
si
l
enceandherey
esar
ebor
ingi
ntome
whi
chmakesmyhear
ttot
hudhar
der
.
“
It
’sokayboy
,Iheary
ouandi
twoul
dbe
unf
airofmet
ost
opy
ouf
rom mov
ingon.
4y
ear
sisal
ongt
imeandy
ouar
est
il
l
y
oung,
youal
sodeser
vesomeonet
o
l
ovey
ou.Idon’
that
eyougoonboyl
i
ve
y
ourl
i
feandbehappy
”Ir
eleaseasi
gh
ofr
eli
efangl
ooki
ntohergl
i
steni
ngey
es.
“
Thanky
oumama”
“
Doy
ouwantsomet
hingt
oeatordr
ink”
“
Noi
mfi
nemom,
Ijusthadbr
eakf
ast
.I
shoul
dgetgoi
ngact
ual
l
y”
“
Okayboy
”Iki
sshercheekandgetup
whenIgett
othedoorshecal
l
sme
“
Ma?
”
“
Arey
ousur
eaboutt
his?
”
“
YesMom”
“
Goodt
hen,
becauseI
twi
l
lber
eal
l
ybad
f
orwhoev
ert
hatgi
rli
s,i
fitev
ert
urned
outt
haty
ouar
est
il
lst
uckonmy
daught
er.That
’swi
l
lsetf
ory
our
r
elat
ionshi
pupf
orf
ail
ure.
”Ismi
l
e,Il
ove
t
hemot
heri
nst
incti
nher
.
“
IknowmamaandIpr
omi
seI
’
m sur
e”
“
All
thebest
”
“
Thanky
ou,
hav
eagr
eatday
”
“
Yout
oomyboy
”Iheadoutandgeti
n
mycar
.Wheeewt
hatwentwel
l
.Nowi
t’
s
t
imet
ocal
lmybabyandl
etherknow
t
hatt
he‘
meet
ingt
hepar
ent
sdi
nner
’is
on.Justt
henmyphoner
ingsI
t’
sNandi
.
Wehav
ebeengoodf
ri
endsev
ersi
nce
wel
ostourbaby
.Imadei
tcl
eart
oher
t
hatIdon’
tlov
eherl
i
ket
hatandshe
under
stoodbecausesheknewt
hat
she’
stheonest
hataskedmeoutIwas
nev
eri
nter
est
edi
nherf
rom t
hef
ir
st
pl
ace.Il
i
kehowhowshet
ook
ev
ery
thi
ngl
i
keanadul
tandl
ear
ntt
o
l
oveher
sel
ffi
rstbef
orel
ovi
ngsomeone
el
se.Ourr
elat
ionshi
pisbasedon
f
ri
endshi
pnot
hingmor
e,shehasaner
d
boy
fri
endnow.Her
eal
l
ylov
esher,
he’
s
t
aki
nggoodcar
eofherandI
’
m so
happyf
orher
.
“
Mnandi
mageu”IanswerasIdr
iveof
f,
shegi
ggl
es
“
Hay
iLwandl
est
opcal
l
ingmet
hat
”I
gi
ggl
e
“
Sor
ryhowar
eyount
wana”
“
I’
m goodwena?
”
“
I’
m goodt
oo”
“
Iwasj
ustchecki
ngupony
ou”
“
Ain’
tyouasweett
hingdanki
ent
wana
y
ami
”
”
Howdi
ditgowi
thMi
ra’
smom?
”
“
Shegav
emeherbl
essi
ngs”
“
Wowy
oumustbehappyneh”
“
YeahI
’
mrel
i
eved”
“
Ican’
twai
ttomeett
hegi
rlwho
managet
owar
m herwayi
ntoy
ourhear
t
phel
ayoul
ovedMi
ra”
“
Youwi
l
lmeethernt
wanaIwi
l
lsetupa
day,
todayshe’
smeet
ingt
hef
olks”
“
That
’sgr
eatnt
wanal
ookIhav
etoget
backt
owor
k”
“
Thanksf
ort
hecal
lnt
wana”
“
Sur
e”Ihangupandcal
lAy
anda.
“
Baby
”
“
Yay
awami
unj
ani
”(
howar
eyou)I
’
m
sur
eshe’
sscar
letr
ightnow,
shel
ovesi
t
whenIcal
lhert
hat
.
“
I’
m goodLwandl
elwami
unj
ani
wena?
”
“
I’
m al
sof
ine,
Ijustmi
ssy
ou”
“
Imi
ssy
out
oo”
“
Toni
ghti
son,
youar
emeet
ingt
he
f
olks”
“
Youar
ejoki
ngr
ight
”
“
NoI
’
m not
”
“
Butbaby
,it
'sshor
tnot
ice”
“
I’
m sor
ryaboutt
hat
,I’
mjustex
cit
ed”
”
Eish”
“
Heymypar
ent
swi
l
llov
eyoudon’
t
st
ressokay
”
“
Okay
”
“
Iwi
l
lfet
chy
ouathal
f7”
“
OkIl
ovey
ou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Ihangup.Yay
aandI
met2y
ear
sagowest
art
edof
fasboot
y
cal
l
s.Ev
eryt
imewhenIneededt
o
r
eleaseshewasal
way
sav
ail
abl
e.We
st
art
edshar
ingouri
ssueswi
theach
ot
her
.Shewasdumpedbysomeni
gga
f
orherf
ri
endt
hathi
therhar
dsoshe
deci
dedt
ohav
enost
ri
ngsat
tached
r
elat
ionshi
p.Al
ongt
hewaywef
ind
our
sel
vesf
all
i
ngf
oreachot
hersoher
e
wear
e.

Idon’
tbl
amebl
ameLwandl
eformov
ing
on,
it’
sbeen4y
ear
sandhe’
sst
il
lyoung.
Hedeser
vesasecondchancet
olov
e
agai
n.I
’
m gl
adt
hathe’
sfi
nal
l
ylet
ti
nggo
i
t’
sbeenv
eryhar
dforhi
m.Heal
most
l
osthi
sli
fe.Iwi
shhi
m al
lthebesti
nhi
s
r
elat
ionshi
p.Af
terLwandl
elef
tIi
ndul
ge
onmyv
odkasi
tt
ingont
hecouch,
it
keept
ast
ingni
cereachpassi
ngday
.My
phonedi
stur
bsme.It
akei
tandanswer
i
t
“
Ya”Ibur
p
“
I’
m out
side,
pleaseopent
hegat
efor
me”
“
Okay
”Igetupandst
umbl
etot
he
ki
tchen.Iopent
hegat
eandt
hedoorf
or
hi
mthemi
nut
ehe’
sinsi
det
hehouseI
r
usht
othenear
estbat
hroom.He’
s
hol
dingmyweav
eandbr
ushi
ngmyback
asIt
hrowupev
ery
thi
ngIat
e.If
eel
so
weakanddi
sor
ient
edi
t’
sonl
ythemat
ter
oft
imemybodygi
vesi
ntoobecauseI
hav
ebeenl
ongdeadont
hei
nsi
de.Once
I
’
m donehehel
psmeup,
Iri
nsemy
mout
handhewi
pesmymout
hwi
tha
t
owel
.Iseedi
ff
erentemot
ionsdi
spl
ayed
onhi
sbl
oodshotr
edey
es.Hescoops
meupandwal
kst
othel
i
vingr
oom.He
pl
acesmeont
hecouch.
“
Doy
ouwantsomet
hingt
oeat
?”Ishake
myheadno.Hepl
acesmyl
egsonhi
s
l
apsashesi
tsont
hecouchnex
ttome
“
Don’
tyougett
ir
edofcl
eani
ngaf
teran
ol
dwoman.I
t’
sbeenf
oury
ear
snowy
ou
shoul
dbeoutt
her
edoi
ngwhat
ever
”
“
Ther
e’snopl
aceI
'
drat
herbet
hanher
e”
Isi
gh
“
LookKhuz
ani
whathappened,
happened.Ther
e’snot
hingwecando
abouti
t.Pl
easedon’
tfeel
indebt
edt
o
me.Gooutt
her
ehav
efun,
enj
oy
y
our
sel
f,I
'
m sur
ether
e’swomanout
t
her
edy
ingf
ory
ourat
tent
ionbuther
e
y
ouar
ecl
eani
ngaf
terme.
”It
’sbeen
pai
nful
,meani
ngl
essandsor
rowf
ul4
y
ear
sofmyl
i
fe.It
ri
ed,
bel
i
evemeI
r
eal
l
ytr
iedt
ost
ayposi
ti
vebuteacht
ime
Iwascal
l
edt
oident
if
yherbodyandi
t
t
urnedoutnotbei
ngher
,thatshat
ter
ed
meandcr
ashedt
hel
i
ttl
ehopet
hatIhad.
Vodkahasbeenmybestf
ri
endf
ort
hese
pasty
ear
sithel
pedmet
ogot
hrough
eachdaymucht
oZo’
sandKhuz
ani
’
s
di
sappr
oval
.Speaki
ngoft
hoset
wot
hey
hav
ebeenv
erysuppor
ti
veov
ert
hese
y
ear
sbutmypai
nisi
ntensenoonecan
act
ual
l
ysav
emef
rom i
t.Ihav
ecomet
o
accepti
tandal
lIwantnowi
sjustt
olet
gomay
beIwi
l
lfi
ndpeaceand
happi
nessi
ntheaf
ter
li
fe.
“
Yourdaught
eri
soutt
her
eal
one
becauseofme,
youar
esuf
fer
ingf
rom
al
cohol
i
sm becauseofme,
youhav
e
gi
venuponl
i
febecauseofme,
youar
e
i
nthi
spai
nbecauseofme.Iowey
oumy
l
i
feBonga”
“
Iti
swhati
tisKhuz
ani
,youdi
dn’
tknow
t
hingswi
l
ltur
noutl
i
ket
his.Goonl
i
ve
y
ourl
i
feandf
orgetaboutev
ery
thi
ng”
“
Icantf
orgetaboutev
ery
thi
ngatl
easti
f
Icoul
dfi
ndMi
ra”
“
It
’sbeen4y
ear
sashar
dasi
tisbutwe
hav
etof
acei
tKhuz
ani
she’
sgone”
“
Nodon’
tsayt
hat
!”
“
It
’st
rueshe’
sdeadshecan’
tjustv
ani
sh
wi
thoutat
race.Deat
hist
heonl
ylogi
cal
ex
planat
ionasmuchaswedon’
twant
t
ofacei
t”
“
Hay
iBongahav
efai
th.I
’
m doi
ngal
lI
canandIwon’
tgi
veuponherunt
ilIf
ind
herpl
easedon’
tgi
veupt
oo”He
squeez
esmyhandi
ntohi
s,Ishakemy
headno
“
Fai
thi
swhatbr
oughtusher
eint
hef
ir
st
pl
ace.I
fonl
yIdi
dsomet
hingabout
Khumal
owewoul
dn’
tbeher
e.Ihadf
ait
h
t
hathewi
l
lchangeandbyt
het
imehe
t
houghtaboutchangi
ngi
twast
ool
ate.
I
tjustshowst
hatonl
yaf
ewgetsecond
chancesi
nli
fe.Imadebaddeci
sions
andt
heyaf
fect
edmydaught
er.Idi
dn’
t
getasecondchancet
ori
ghtmywr
ongs.
Iwasnev
ergi
venachancet
omakeher
happy
,achancet
ohol
dheri
nmyar
ms
andt
ell
herIl
oveheraf
terourhugef
ight
.
Tot
ell
hert
hatIdi
dn’
tmeant
osay
st
upi
dbl
i
ndgi
rlandI
’
mver
ysor
ry.To
seeherbl
ossom i
nhermusi
ccar
eer
.To
seeherget
ti
ngmar
ri
edandhav
ingki
ds,
ohIwoul
dhav
espoi
l
tmygr
andki
dsj
ust
l
i
keIspoi
l
edher
.”Ismi
l
easIi
magi
ne
t
hatbeaut
if
ulpi
ctur
einmymi
nd.I
’
m
br
oughtbackf
rom myt
rancebya
t
humbt
hatst
opsmyt
earf
rom f
all
i
ng.
“
Youcanst
il
ldot
hoset
hingsBonga.
.”
“
Nost
opi
t!St
opi
tKhuz
ani
please,
she’
s
nev
ercomi
ngback”Icl
osemyey
es
al
l
owi
ngmyt
ear
stof
all
eff
ort
lessl
y
“
Wewi
l
lfi
ndherI
…”
“
Wehav
ebeensi
ngi
ngt
hatsongf
or4
y
ear
snow.I
t’
sti
met
oleti
tgo.Mybaby
i
sgoneshe’
snev
ercomi
ngback.Iwi
l
l
nev
erseeheragai
n”Agutwr
enchi
ng
sobescapemyl
i
ps.Heshi
ft
scl
oserand
pr
essesmyheadagai
nsthi
sbuf
fchest
.
“
I’
m sor
ry,
I’
mreal
l
ysor
ry,
I’
m soso
sor
ry”Hewhi
sper
sbar
elyaudi
ble
enoughf
ormet
ohearhi
m.Ev
ent
odayI
cr
ybutmyt
ear
snev
err
unout
.I’
mti
red
ofl
i
vingl
i
ket
his.Ij
ustwantt
odi
ebut
I
’
m notbr
aveenought
oendmyl
i
fe.I
t’
s
awhi
l
elat
eandI
’
m st
il
lpr
essedagai
nst
hi
schest
,noonei
ssay
ingany
thi
ngt
o
t
heot
her
.I’
m sur
ewear
ebot
hlostt
o
oursoul
l
esst
hought
sandt
he
mel
anchol
yat
mospher
esur
roundi
ngus
i
snothel
pingt
hesi
tuat
ion.
“
Go,
mov
eon,
li
vey
ourl
i
feKhuz
ani
”I
pul
lbackandwi
pemyt
ear
s
“
NoI
’
m notdoi
ngt
hatandwhosai
dmy
l
i
fei
sonst
andst
il
lwhenI
’
m her
ewi
th
y
ou,
cel
aungangi
phaphel
itu”Imanage
t
olaughhel
ooksatmewi
thaf
aint
smi
l
e
“
Youhav
eabeaut
if
ull
augh,
Iwi
shIcan
makey
oul
aughev
ery
day
”Ismi
l
efai
ntl
y
andl
ookdown,
hel
i
ftsupmychi
nour
ey
esmeet
.It
’sf
unnyi
t’
sonl
ynowI
not
icet
hathe’
sreal
l
ygoodl
ooki
ngman.
It
rav
elmyey
esdownt
ohi
smout
h.He
br
oughthi
slowerl
i
pbet
weenhi
steet
h,I
hav
enot
icedhedoest
hatal
otwhen
he’
sner
vous.Hi
sli
psar
eent
ici
ng,
my
t
oungei
nvol
unt
ari
l
yli
cksmi
ne.Ihav
e
nev
erl
ookatanot
hermanl
i
ket
his
ex
ceptKhumal
oGodwhatam Idoi
ng!
Myey
escl
osedmoment
ari
l
ybyt
het
ime
Iopent
hem t
her
e’sbar
elyaspace
bet
weenourf
acesandhi
sbr
eat
hof
mi
nti
scar
essi
ngmyf
acesendi
ng
shi
ver
sdownmyspi
ne.Ourl
i
pscol
l
ide
f
orabr
iefmomentt
her
e’snoact
ion,
the
momenthi
shandsf
indst
hei
rwayt
othe
si
desofmyf
acehi
sphoner
ings.He
gr
oansagai
nstmyl
i
psandpul
lbackt
o
answerhi
sphone.
“
Sur
e..
.okay
..
.shar
p­”Hehangsupand
l
ooksatme
“
What
?”Iask
“
Ihav
esomet
hingt
oshowy
oupl
ease
don’
tbemadatme.Seei
ngy
oul
i
ket
his
i
ski
l
li
ngmei
nsi
deIt
houghtl
etmedo
somet
hingj
ustt
ocheery
ouupal
i
ttl
e
andgi
vey
ouhope”OkayI
’
m cur
ious
now
“
Whati
sit
?”
“
It
’sout
sideal
l
owmet
ogogeti
t”He
bi
teshi
slowerl
i
p,Iwonderwhati
sthat
makeshi
m ner
vousl
i
ket
his
“
Go”Heget
supandmakehi
swayout
l
eav
ingmei
nant
ici
pat
ion.Mi
nut
elat
eI
hearhi
m wal
ki
ngi
n,hest
andsbyt
he
ent
ranceempt
yhanded.
“
Whati
sitkant
i?”Isayl
ooki
ngathi
m,a
womanbehi
ndhi
m showsup,
Igasp
wi
thshockwi
thmyey
espoppedout
“
Nono”shesay
s
“
Mama!
”Iscr
eam,
Idon’
tknowwhenor
howbutIf
indmy
sel
fwr
appedi
nher
ar
mscr
yingmyl
ungsout
.
“
Ngi
yax
oli
samt
anami
,ohngi
cel
aux
olo
Nonowami
”(I
’
m sor
rymychi
l
d,oh
pl
easef
orgi
vememyNono)

I
’
m wokenupbyhi
stongueal
lov
ermy
f
acenott
hatIwassl
eepi
ngt
houghI
’
m
j
ustst
il
li
nbed,
todayi
soneoft
hose
day
swher
eget
ti
ngoutoft
hisbedi
s
har
d.Hecont
inuest
oli
cksatmyf
ace
andbar
kst
hat
'shi
swayofwaki
ngme
up.
“
Rocky
!”Doeshest
opno!Rockyi
smy
gui
dedog.
“
Rockyst
opi
tmaan!
”Ipushhi
m away
f
rom myf
aceandIheargi
ggl
es.If
eel
t
hebedcr
ingi
ngasi
taccommodat
eSt
ar
“
Habar
izaasubuhi
”(goodmor
ning)
“
Asubuhi
”(mor
ning)I
t’
stookmeal
most
2y
ear
stol
ear
nSwahi
l
i.
“
Kuamkani
l
ikuf
any
aki
funguaki
nywa”
(
WakeupImadey
oubr
eakf
ast
)
“
Sihi
sinj
aa”(
I’
m nothungr
y)Ihearher
heav
ingasi
gh,
sheknowst
hati
t’
sone
oft
hoseday
s.
“
Nil
i
kuwani
ki
fi
ki
rit
unawez
akwendanj
e
unahi
taj
ikwendanj
enakuf
urahi
ami
aka
y
akesasasasahauj
uikuj
i
zui
ahapa.
Ui
shi
kidogo”(
Iwast
hinki
ngwecoul
d
goout
,youneedgooutandhav
efun.
I
t'
sbeeny
ear
snowy
oucantkeep
l
ocki
ngy
our
sel
finher
e.Li
veal
i
ttl
e)I
don’
trepl
ybutl
etmyt
ear
sdot
het
alki
ng.
“
OhMuuj
i
zausi
l
ia”(
OhMi
racl
edon’
tcr
y)
If
eel
herar
mswr
appi
ngar
oundme.Il
et
outagutwr
enchi
ngsob.St
arandmy
adopt
ivepar
ent
shav
ebeent
ryi
ngso
har
dtogetmeoutofher
eandl
i
vel
i
ke
anyot
her23y
earol
dsbutwhatt
hey
don’
tunder
standi
sthatI
’
m notj
ustany
23y
earol
d.Ihav
edeepunheal
i
ng
woundsi
nmyhear
t.Themor
eyear
s
passesbyt
heygetdeeperandmor
e
pai
nful
.Li
vi
ngwi
thgui
l
t,r
egr
etandsel
f-
bl
ameev
ery
dayki
l
lsonesoul
i
mmensel
y.I
’
m bat
tl
ingt
oli
vewi
tht
he
f
actt
hatIki
l
ledmymot
her
.I’
m
r
esponsi
blef
orherdeat
h.I
fonl
yI
l
i
stenedt
oherwhenshet
oldmet
onot
i
nter
fer
einhermar
it
ali
ssuesshewoul
d
best
il
lal
i
ve.WhenIhear
dthatgunshotI
knewt
hati
twast
heendofherandIhad
t
orunandnev
erl
ookback.Ihav
ebeen
l
i
vingi
nfeart
hatKhumal
owoul
dfi
nd
meandki
l
lme.Idon’
tknowi
fIshoul
d
sayIwasl
uckyorbl
essedt
hatont
hat
ni
ghtIwashi
tbyacarandgothur
ton
myl
eg.For
tunat
elyt
hedr
iverdi
dn’
trun
awayhewant
edt
otakemet
othe
hospi
tal
Iref
usedandt
oldhi
m
ev
ery
thi
ng.Hewasv
erysy
mpat
het
ic
wi
thmebuthonest
lyIwasscar
ed.I
t’
s
noteasyt
ojustt
rustast
rangerbutIt
old
my
sel
f“si
bindi
uyabul
alasi
bindi
uy
aphi
l
isa”
.It
’st
urnsoutt
hemanwasi
n
SAv
isi
ti
nghi
sinl
awswi
thhi
swi
fe,
they
act
ual
l
yli
vesi
nKeny
a.Thi
showIf
ound
my
sel
finNai
robi
thecapi
tal
cit
yof
Keny
awi
thal
ovi
ngf
ami
l
ywhoaccept
ed
mef
orwhoIam andgav
emenot
hing
butpur
elov
ewel
lex
ceptSt
ar’
smot
her
butt
hat
’sast
oryf
oranot
herday
.The
deat
hofmymot
herandr
unni
ngf
ormy
l
i
fehi
tmehar
dthatIwasdi
agnosed
wi
thmaj
ordepr
essi
on.I
’
m on
ant
idepr
essant
sandIat
tendt
her
apy
sessi
ons.OhhowImi
ssmymot
her
,
act
ual
l
yImi
ssev
ery
one.Iwonderhow
mydi
sappear
ancel
eftt
hem?Iwonderi
f
Lwenkosi
missmel
i
keIdo?Guguy
ena,
mal
umeSox
,Sno,
mom Zogosh
ev
ery
oneIev
enmi
ssLwenkosi
’
s
gr
andmaandNandi
.Iknowhey
.
“
Sit
akuhi
miz
aki
l
aki
tuambachohut
aki
kuf
any
avi
zur
i”(
I’
m notgoi
ngt
ofor
ce
y
out
oany
thi
ngy
oudon’
twantt
odo
okay
)Inodwi
thmyhead.If
eel
her
handscar
essi
ngmycheeks
“
Weweni
mremboMuuj
i
za”(
youar
e
beaut
if
ulMi
racl
e)Imanaget
osmi
l
eshe
pul
l
smecl
oserandki
ssesme.Idon’
t
knowwhatIshoul
dlabel
the
r
elat
ionshi
pIhav
ewi
thSt
ar.Wehav
e
hadsex
ual
encount
ersf
oray
earnow.
Shehasbeent
hebestsi
sterbutnowI
don’
tknowi
fit
’sst
il
lri
ghtt
osaywear
e
si
ster
sori
sitsi
ster
swi
thbenef
it
s,gosh
t
hatsoundsgr
oss!
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayYol
i
saYobha
My
ataz
a&AsandaSi
fi
le
CHAPTER33(
unedi
ted)

Ican’
tbel
i
eveI
’
minmymom’
sar
ms
cr
yingandshe’
scr
adl
i
ngmel
i
keshe
uset
owhenIwasy
oung.I
t’
sfeel
s
sur
real
forsomer
easonIpul
lbackand
l
ookatherj
ustt
omakesur
eifI
’
m not
dr
eami
ng.
“
Mama”Iwhi
sperasIcupherf
acei
n
mypal
ms,
try
ingt
omakesur
eift
hisi
s
r
eal
herort
her
e’ssomesor
tofa
mi
stake
“
it
’sy
ouMama”
“
Yesbabyi
t’
sme”shesay
ssof
tl
yand
t
ear
scascadedownherf
ace.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evei
t”
“
I’
m sor
ryNonoIknowt
hat
….”
“
Shhhi
t’
sokayI
’
mjustgl
ady
ouar
eher
e
andy
ouar
est
il
lal
i
veGodImi
ssedy
ou
mama”It
hrowmy
sel
finherar
msagai
n.
West
ayi
neachot
her
’sembr
acecr
ying.
I
t’
sbeen23y
ear
sIl
astsawmymot
her
.
Inev
ert
houghtIwi
l
lseeheragai
n.I
t
hinkI
’
m goi
ngt
owakeupf
rom t
his
dr
eam.
“
Uhm l
etmel
eav
eyout
wo”say
s
Khuz
ani
Ihav
eev
enf
orgot
tenabouthi
m.
“
Thanky
ousomuchbaba”mom say
sto
Khuz
ani
whonodswi
thhi
sheadand
wal
ksout
.Mom wi
pesmyt
ear
sand
pl
ant
sapeckonmyl
i
ps
“
Eversi
ncey
oul
eftIhav
enev
erf
ound
peacei
nmyl
i
fe.It
ri
edt
olookf
ory
ou
butIf
ail
ed.Inev
ert
houghtIwi
l
lseey
ou
agai
nNono.I
’
m sor
rybabyI
’
m deepl
y
sor
ryandI
’
m soashamedofmy
sel
f.I
wasn’
tsupposedt
ojustl
ety
ougol
i
ke
t
hatnomat
terwhaty
oudi
d.Youwer
e
y
oungbabyandy
oumadeami
stakel
i
ke
ev
ery
body
.Iwasal
readygi
vi
ngupbut
whent
hatgent
lemanar
ri
vedathome
andt
oldmeheknowswher
eyoul
i
veI
hadt
oleav
eev
ery
thi
ngandcomesee
y
oumy
sel
f.OhNonoy
ouhav
egr
ownso
muchl
astt
imeIsawy
ouwer
ejusta
y
oungwomanl
ookaty
ounow.
”Ismi
l
e
f
aint
ly
“
It
’sbeen23y
ear
s”
“
Neh.
.y
ouar
est
il
lbeaut
if
ul”
“
ComeonIl
ookl
i
keahobo”
“
Abeaut
if
ulhobo”
“
Ouchy
ouagr
eeIl
ookl
i
keahobo”She
gi
ggl
es
“
I’
mjustj
oki
ngbabyy
ouar
enotahobo”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evey
ouar
ereal
l
yher
e”
“
I’
m her
ebabyandt
hist
imeI
’
m not
goi
ngany
wher
e.I
t’
sunf
airandsel
fi
shof
met
oasky
out
ogi
vemeasecond
chancei
nyourl
i
feIknowbutIwon’
t
gi
veupony
ouespeci
all
ynotwhenI
hav
efoundy
ou.Ngi
cel
aux
olomt
anami
”
(
I’
m sor
rymychi
l
d)
“
I’
m notangr
yaty
ouany
mor
emommy
.I
f
orgav
eyoul
ongt
imeago”
“
Ohsi
sthanky
ousomuch.Yoursi
ster
s
woul
dbesohappyt
oseey
ou”Ismi
l
e
“
Howar
etheyIhav
emi
ssedy
ouguy
s
somuch”
“
Theyar
efi
neandt
heyar
ebot
hmar
ri
ed
now”
”
WowIcantwai
ttoseet
hem.Doy
ou
wantany
thi
ngt
odr
ink”
“
Teapl
easebaby
”Igetupandmakemy
wayt
otheki
tchent
opr
epar
eteaand
bi
scui
tsf
ormama.WhenIf
ini
shIt
ake
t
het
rayt
oli
vi
ngr
oom andgi
vei
tto
mama.
“
Thanky
ou”Il
ookatherandIst
il
lcan’
t
bel
i
evei
t.
“
Howar
eyoumama”
“
I’
mtheonewhoshoul
dasky
out
hat
NonoKhuz
ani
tol
dmet
haty
ouhav
ea
daught
erandshe’
smi
ssi
ng.Uqhuba
kanj
ani
kodamt
anami
”(Howar
eyou
hol
dingup)
“
Kunz
imamama”(
it
shar
dmama)f
resh
newt
ear
sdr
opsdownmyf
ace.
“
OhbabyI
’
m sor
ryandIknowhowy
ou
ar
efeel
i
ng.Ihav
efoundy
ouIbel
i
evewe
wi
l
lfi
ndmygr
andchi
l
dtoo.
”
“
It
’sbeen4y
ear
smama”
“
4year
sisnot
hingcompar
edt
o23
y
ear
s”
“
TruebutIcantt
akeanymor
eyear
s.
The4y
ear
shav
ebeent
ort
urous
enough”
“
Iknowsi
s,Iknow.
.Ihav
efai
thwewi
l
l
f
indher
.Howol
disshe?
”
“
23y
ear
sol
dnow”
“
Hawui
ntombi
endal
anj
eimpel
a”
“
Efananomny
eni
wakho”It
akemy
phoneandpaget
hrought
oshowher
Mi
ra’
spi
ctur
es
“
She’
sbeaut
if
ulNono,
sheev
engoty
our
f
ather
’sey
es.
”
“
YouknowGodwor
kinmy
ster
iousway
s
outofal
lpeopl
eshehadt
olookl
i
kedad
t
hev
erysameper
sonIdespi
se”
“
Her
egr
etwhathedi
dNono.
”Ishr
ugI
don’
tknowi
fI’
mreadyt
ofor
giv
ehi
m,
noty
et
“
Whoi
sthef
atherofy
ourdaught
er?
”I
cl
earmyt
hroat
“
Mfani
seni
”shenodsandsi
ponhert
ea.
Ispendt
her
estofdaywi
thmymot
her
cat
chi
ngup.Imi
ssedal
oti
nherl
i
feas
muchasshedi
dtomi
ne.Herpr
esence
i
nbr
ingssenseofhopei
nmyl
i
fe.I
’
m so
gr
atef
ult
oKhuz
ani
,Icanf
eel
myhope
r
est
ori
ngnow.

“
Ungr
atef
ulbi
tch!
!”
“
Mommy
!Dadddypl
easedon’
t,
it’
snot
mom i
twasme.Hi
tmenother
!!
”Icr
y
beggi
nghi
m butI
tdoesn’
tseem l
i
ke
he’
shear
ingmebecauseIcanhearmy
mom scr
eami
ngi
nagony
“
Bit
ch!Igav
eyouev
ery
thi
ngy
ouwant
ed
andt
hisi
showy
out
hankme!Youwant
t
oki
l
lme!
”Herscr
eamsofagony
pi
ercest
hroughmyhear
tIcan’
thol
dmy
t
ear
s.
“
Daddypl
easeI
’
m beggi
ngy
ou!I
t’
sme
notmom!Shedi
dn’
tknowIswear
!”It
ry
t
oex
plai
ntohi
mthr
oughmysobsbuti
t
doesn’
tseem l
i
kehe’
shear
ingmeorhe
wantt
oli
stent
ome.Ihearal
oudgr
oan
f
rom dadandI
’
m wonder
ingwhat
’s
goi
ngon.If
eel
handst
ouchi
ngmeand
j
umpwi
thf
ri
ght
“
Runbabyandnev
erl
ookback”mom
whi
sper
sonmyear
“
MommynoIcan’
tleav
eyouher
e!”
“
I’
m sor
rymybabyIt
houghtIwi
l
lbe
abl
etohandl
ethi
s.I
’
m sor
ryt
hatIf
ail
ed
y
ou.Run”
“
Runandgowher
emommy
?NoIr
ather
di
ewi
thy
ouher
e”Icr
yhy
ster
ical
l
y
“
Ilov
eyousomuch”Shesqueez
esme
i
nherar
msandki
ssesmyl
i
ps
“
Mommyno!
”
“
It
’sgoi
ngt
obeokaybaby
,Iwi
l
lal
way
s
bewi
thy
ou”Wher
edoessheex
pectme
t
orunt
oIcan’
tev
ensee!
“
Mama”Ihearherscr
eami
ng
“
Comeher
eyoubi
tchy
ouknowhowt
o
f
ightnowhuh!Youwantust
ofi
ght
showmewhaty
ougot
!!
”If
iddl
efor
muf
fi
nandf
indmywayout
.Tear
scan’
t
st
opf
all
i
ngdownmyf
ace.Themoment
I
’
m outt
hegat
eIhearagunshotand
mywhol
ebodyf
reez
e.
“
Muuj
i
za!
..
Muuj
i
za!
”If
eel
someone
shaki
ngmeIj
umpupdr
ippi
ngwetwi
th
sweatandt
ear
s
“
Shhhhi
l
ikuwamt
otowandot
o”(
shhhi
t
wasadr
eam baby
)mom say
sasshe
pul
l
smeupt
oherar
msst
roki
ngbyback.
Theni
ght
mar
esdon’
twantt
ost
op.
“
Ishoul
dhav
ewentbackanddi
ewi
th
hermommy
”
“
Dontsayt
hatpl
easey
ouar
ehur
ti
ng
me”
“
Iwantt
obef
reef
rom t
hisgui
l
tand
mi
ser
ymom I
’
m notwi
nni
ngi
t’
sbeen
y
ear
snow”
“
Muuj
i
zal
i
stent
ome…”
“
Iwantmymommypl
easemommy
”
“
Ohhbabyev
ery
thi
ngshal
lbeokay
.Al
l
t
hispai
nhaunt
ingy
oursoul
wil
lbeno
mor
eonedayj
usthangi
nther
e”
“
NoIcan’
ttakei
tIwantt
odi
eandgot
o
mymommy
”
“
Muuj
i
za.
.I
ist
ent
omebaby
…”
“
Nomommy
…”
“
Muuj
i
za!
”Shehal
fshout
s
“
List
ent
omesweet
hear
tIknowt
hepai
n
y
ouar
egoi
ngt
hroughandIcanf
eel
it
butdon’
tgi
veup.I
’
m her
efory
ouand
I
’
m goi
ngt
ohel
pyoupi
ckupal
lyour
pi
eces.Iknowt
hatIcannev
ert
akey
our
mom’
spl
acebutasy
oursecondmom
I
’
m her
efory
oumydar
li
ng.Leanonme
pl
easeal
l
owmet
ohol
dyourhandand
wal
kwi
thy
out
hrought
hispai
nyouar
e
goi
ngt
hrough”Icr
yinherar
msasshe
hol
dsmeIwi
shi
twasj
ustt
hateasy
.
Ev
erysi
ngl
edayofmyl
i
feIt
hinkofmy
mom.Imi
sshersomuchI
’
m si
nki
ng
deeperanddeeperi
ntot
hedar
khol
e
andwhenIt
ryt
ocl
i
mboutsomet
hingi
s
pul
l
ingmeback.Ir
emembermysecond
sui
cideat
temptwaswhenDad’
sman
whom hehi
redt
odoi
nvest
igat
ion
conf
ir
medt
hatmom di
edandKhumal
o
i
slooki
ngf
orme.Iknewt
hatshedi
ed
butt
heconf
ir
mat
ionki
l
ledmebey
ondI
di
dn’
tseet
her
easont
oli
veany
mor
e.I
want
edt
odi
eandgot
omymommy
.
“
Unahi
taj
ikut
okanj
eyaki
tandahi
kina
kuoga”(
Youneedt
ogetoutoft
hisbed
andhav
eabat
h)Idon’
thav
eener
gyof
get
ti
ngoutoft
hisbedandIt
hink
somet
imesnooneunder
stand.
“
Youneedt
ofi
ghtMuuj
i
zaI
’
m beggi
ng
y
ou.
”Isi
ghi
nthatv
erysamemomentI
hearadooropeni
ngt
henf
oot
steps
comi
ngt
owar
ds
“
Mommywhyi
sMuui
j
izacr
ying”say
s
Kamar
ia
“
She’
snotcr
yingsweet
hear
tther
e’s
somet
hingi
nherey
es”
“
Samahani
”(I
’
m sor
ry)shesay
swi
thher
sweetv
oicef
il
li
ngmyhear
twi
thwar
mth.
She’
sabeaut
if
ull
i
ttl
esoul
thi
soneshe
r
emi
ndsmeofSnot
hando.
“
MommyAunt
yGabbyandSt
arar
e
f
ight
ingagai
n!”Shesay
sdr
amat
ical
l
yas
al
way
s,shegotdr
amaf
orday
sit
’sso
cut
eandhermout
hisv
erymuchol
der
t
henher
.AghSt
ar’
smom i
sher
eIdon’
t
t
hinkIwi
l
lev
ercomeoutoft
hisbed.
“
Okaybabyt
hanksf
ort
ell
i
ngme”
“
Dai
mani
fur
ahamama”(
It
sal
way
sa
pl
easur
emom)mom andIgi
ggl
e.
“
Iwi
l
lgopl
aywi
thRockymommy
”mom
agr
eesaf
tert
hatIhearherl
i
ttl
e
f
oot
stepsr
unni
ngaway
.
“
Whendi
dyouguy
sar
ri
ved?
”Mom ,
Dad
andKamar
iawer
einCapeTownf
or
Aunt
yGabby
’shousewar
ming.Herman
boughtherabeachhouseofwhi
chshe
can’
tst
opbr
aggi
ngabout
.
“
Lastni
ght
”Yest
erdaySt
arandIspent
t
hewhol
edayi
nbedcuddl
i
ng.
“
Comel
et’
sgety
oucl
eanedupMi
ssy
!”I
gr
oan
“
Muuj
i
zapl
ease”
“
Mommypl
ease”
“
No,St
art
oldmet
haty
ouguy
sspent
t
hewhol
edayi
nbedandy
ousent
At
ienaback.Youcan’
tski
pyour
sessi
onswi
thy
ourt
her
api
stbaby
”
“
Iwasn’
tinaspacet
otal
kandt
his
t
alki
ngshi
tisnotwor
kingf
orme!
”
“
Muuj
i
zaMwangi
!”Iknowwhenshe
cal
l
smewi
thmyf
ull
nameshe’
smad,
wel
lyesI
’
m nol
ongerMi
raMt
himkhul
u
butMuuj
i
zaMwangi
.Ihadt
ochangemy
i
dent
it
yformysaf
ety
.Muui
j
zai
sMi
racl
e
i
nSwahi
l
iIdi
dn’
twantt
ochangemy
namecompl
etel
yit
’ssomet
hingt
hatI
wantt
ohol
dont
oasIwasgi
veni
tby
mymot
her
.
“
I’
m sor
rymom buthonest
lyt
alki
ng
won’
tbr
ingbackmymot
her
”shesi
ghs
heav
il
y
“
Youneedt
ogi
vei
tti
mesweet
hear
t
pl
ease”Iheav
easi
ghandnod,
it’
sthe
onl
ythi
ngIcoul
ddobecauseshe’
s
t
ryi
ngandIhav
etoappr
eci
atewhat
she’
sdoi
ngf
orme.I
t’
sver
yrar
etof
ind
someonewhocanl
ovey
oul
i
key
ouar
e
herownchi
l
d.Shehasbeent
hebest
andbabat
ooIdon’
tknowwhatI
twoul
d
hav
ehappenedt
omei
ftheydi
dn’
ttake
mei
n.Theyhadachoi
cenott
aki
ngme
i
nespeci
all
yaf
terIt
oldt
hem whata
danger
ousmanKhumal
oisandi
t’
s
t
urnsoutt
hatKhumal
o’sexwi
fewas
mama’
sbestf
ri
end.Shesuspect
edt
hat
Khumal
oki
l
ledherbecauseBr
endat
old
hert
hatKhumal
owasabusi
ngherand
t
hathe’
sagangst
er.Thei
rli
vesar
eal
so
i
ndangernowsi
ncet
heyt
ookmei
nbut
st
il
lthatdoesn’
tgi
vet
hem ar
easont
o
t
hrowmeaway
.Iwi
l
lbef
orev
ergr
atef
ul
t
othem.
“
Iwi
l
lgor
unabat
hfory
ou”Ihearher
goi
ngawayt
hencomesbackshehel
ps
meoutofmybedanduncl
othedme
t
hengui
demet
othebat
hroom.They
r
eal
l
ymadel
i
vingwi
tht
hem
comf
ort
abl
eformeev
enmybat
hroom
i
sequi
ppedt
omakemyhy
giene
pr
ocessenj
oyabl
e.Shebat
hsmel
i
keI
’
m
ababywel
lIhav
eki
ndagotuset
oitand
al
l
owher
.Af
termyhy
gienepr
ocessI
dr
essedupt
henwemakeourway
downst
air
stohav
ebr
eakf
ast
.
“
Niv
izur
ikukuonanj
eyaki
tanda
mt
oto”
(it
’sgoodt
oseey
out
haty
ouar
e
outofbedbaby
)Dadsay
sandhugsme.
I
t’
sani
mpr
ovementact
ual
l
y.
“
Mor
ningdaddy
”
“
Mor
ningsweet
hear
t”Hepul
l
sapar
tand
hel
psmesi
tdown
“
Wehav
eoat
s,cor
nfl
akes,
sconesand
y
ourt
ypi
cal
Engl
i
shbr
eakf
astwhat
woul
dyoul
i
ket
oeatMuuj
i
zaIwi
l
ldi
sh
upf
ory
ou”say
sSt
ar
“
Stopdoi
ngt
hingsf
orhershewi
l
lnev
er
l
ear
ntodot
hingsbyher
sel
f!
”Say
s
Aunt
yGabby
,she’
smeanasusual
“
Mamast
opbei
ngabi
tch!
”
“
HeyheyIwoul
dfucky
ouupnx
a!”
Theset
woar
eal
way
sfi
ght
inghence
St
archoset
omov
eher
einKeny
awi
th
heraunt
.Dadandmom uset
owor
k
t
oget
heri
naf
ir
m atJohannesbur
gthat
howt
heymet
.Dad’
sfat
herwasa
Keny
anwhoabondonedhi
slat
emom
andwhenhegotsi
ckhedeci
dedt
o
r
eachoutt
odadandhi
smom andl
eft
al
lhi
sbusi
nessest
oDadt
hat
’swhen
dadhadt
omov
etoKeny
a.
“
Gabbypl
easest
opi
t!I
fyouar
eher
eto
har
rasmychi
l
drengobackt
oCape
Town”mom say
s
“
Youar
econdoni
ngwhat
’sshe’
sdoi
ng
shecal
l
edmeabi
tchCaba!
”
“
Starapol
ogi
zet
oyourmot
her
!”
“
ButAunt
ymom i
s…”
“
StarMt
hembu!
”IhearSt
argr
oani
ng
nex
ttome
“
I’
m sor
rymom”St
armumbl
es.Weeat
br
eakf
astov
eracomf
ort
abl
esi
l
ence
unt
ilSt
arbr
eaksi
t.
“
Aunt
yIwast
hinki
ngoft
aki
ngMuuj
i
za
outj
ustt
ogetf
reshai
rshehasbeen
coopedupher
efory
ear
snow”
“
NonoI
’
m notgoi
ngany
wher
eSt
ar”I
don’
thav
eener
gyt
ogooutandbesi
des
Idon’
twantt
ori
skt
obeseenby
Khumal
o.
“
Aunt
ytal
ktoherpl
ease”
“
Nononono”Ishakemyhead
v
igor
ousl
y,t
ryi
ngt
obr
eat
hbuti
t’
sli
ke
myl
ungsar
eshut
ti
ngdownandmy
chesti
scl
osi
ngi
n.I
’
m sweat
ingand
t
rembl
i
ng,
pani
cat
tacksar
enot
somet
hingnewnow.Wi
thi
nasecond
mom i
snex
ttomebr
ushi
ngmyback
“
Muuj
i
zabr
eat
he,
takeasl
owbr
eat
hin
t
hroughy
ournose,
hol
ditf
oracoupl
eof
seconds,
andt
henex
hal
e”mom say
s
andIdoasshesay
“
Good.
..
youar
edoi
nggood,
repeati
t
agai
n”Ikeepr
epeat
ingunt
ilIr
egai
nmy
br
eat
hing.
“
It
’sokayi
fyoudon’
twantt
ogoout
”
“
Butst
ayi
ngi
ndoor
sfory
ear
sisnot
heal
thyhoney
.Sheneedt
oatl
eastt
ryi
t
woul
ddohergoodI
’
mtel
l
ingy
ou”
“
I’
m scar
eddaddywhati
fKhumal
ofi
nd
me?
”
“
Iwi
l
lgowi
thy
ougi
rl
shewon’
tdo
any
thi
ngbutIdoubthewi
l
lev
enf
ind
y
oui
t’
sbeenf
oury
ear
sI’
m sur
ehegav
e
upl
ooki
ngf
ory
ou”
“
May
beuncl
eyoushoul
daskt
hatman
ofy
our
stof
indouti
fthi
sKhumal
oman
i
sst
il
lhaunt
ingf
orMuuj
i
za.Shecan’
t
l
i
veherl
i
fei
nfearl
i
ket
his”
“
You’
rer
ightSt
arIwi
l
ldot
hat
”Oncewe
ar
edonewi
thbr
eakf
astmom gi
vesme
myant
idepr
essant
sandIdownt
hem
wi
thwat
er.I
t’
sbet
tert
odeal
wit
hthei
r
si
deef
fect
sthr
ought
hedayt
henat
ni
ght
.Dadi
sdr
ivi
ngmeandSt
art
o
Jeev
angeeGar
dens.I
’
m scar
edbutdad
keept
ell
i
ngmet
hat
’snot
hingi
sgoi
ngt
o
happenandhewi
l
lbewi
thusev
en
t
houghhewi
l
lgi
veusaspacet
ochi
l
las
gi
rl
s.Wear
ri
veatourdest
inat
ionand
enj
oyourpi
cni
cov
erwar
m chat
ter
.I
mustsayJeev
angeeGar
densi
sser
ene
y
oucan’
thel
pbutr
elaxy
our
sel
f.Ican’
t
r
ecal
lwhenwast
hel
astt
imeIgotf
resh
ai
randbr
eat
he.Thel
astt
imesomeone
t
ookmeoutf
orpi
cni
cItwasLwenkosi
ont
opofamount
ainhav
ingourpani
c.
Thatwasact
ual
l
yourl
astqual
i
tyt
ime
wespentt
oget
herIwassosur
ethatwe
wer
einl
oveIr
ememberour
conv
ersat
ionaf
terhet
oldmet
hat
Khumal
owascheat
ingonmymom
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Yesmyl
ove”
“
Eversi
ncey
ouwal
kedi
nmyl
i
femy
hear
thasbeenbeat
ingf
ory
ouI
fyou
hur
tmeIsweari
twi
l
lst
opbeat
ing.I
’
m
beggi
ngy
oudon’
thur
tme.
”
“
HeyheyIwon’
tdosucht
hingbaby
.I
l
ovey
ousomuchandt
hanky
ouf
or
l
ovi
ngmebackandaccept
ingmef
or
whoIam.Iwoul
dnev
err
iskl
osi
ngy
ou
Mi
rabecausey
ouar
eal
lIwant
.Don’
t
cr
yokay
”Thosewor
dsf
il
ledmyhear
t
wi
thwar
mthl
i
ttl
edi
dIknowt
heywer
e
j
ustf
ake.I
tshur
tst
hatt
her
e’snoday
passeswi
thouthi
m cr
ossi
ngmymi
nd.I
st
il
lthi
nkaboutt
hegoodmoment
swe
hadt
oget
her
,thewayhemadef
eel
li
keI
wast
heonl
ygi
rlex
ist
ingi
nthewor
ld,
t
hewayhewasnotmaki
ngl
ovet
ome
onl
ybutt
omysoul
aswel
l
,touchi
ng
ev
erychor
dofmybei
ng.Imi
ssev
ery
si
ngl
ebi
tofhi
m,Imi
sshi
svoi
ce,
his
ki
ssesohhi
shugswer
emysaf
eheav
en,
Imi
sshi
sscent
,Imi
sshi
minsi
deofme,
Imi
ssev
enhi
sannoy
ingl
augh.I
fIcoul
d
r
ewi
ndt
imet
othosemoment
sand
al
l
owmy
sel
ftocher
isht
hem f
ort
hel
ast
t
imeast
heyendedsoonerorr
ather
shoul
dIsayInev
erwant
edt
hem t
oend.
“
Iknowwheny
oudr
if
tawayl
i
ket
hisy
ou
ar
ethi
nki
ngabouty
ourpast
.Doy
ou
mi
sshi
m?”
“
Youhav
enoi
dea”
“
OhbabyI
’
m sor
rybuthepl
ayedy
ou”
“
IknowSt
arbutIcan’
thel
pmy
sel
fhe
wasmyf
ir
stt
hroughev
ery
thi
ng”
“
Andi
fhewasr
eal
l
ysor
ryandser
ious
abouty
ouI
’
m sur
ehewoul
dhav
efound
y
ou”
“
ComeonSt
ari
fthemi
ght
yKhumal
o
whohasconnect
ionsev
ery
wher
ecan’
t
f
indmehowwoul
dLwenkosi
findme?
”
“
What
everMuuj
i
zabutwhatmakeme
mor
eangr
yist
hati
fhedi
dn’
tappr
oach
y
ouf
rom t
hef
ir
stpl
acenoneoft
his
woul
dhav
ehappened.Hewast
heone
whogav
eyouani
deat
obr
ingKhumal
o
down.Hemani
pul
atedy
ouknowi
ng
whatadanger
ousmanKhumal
ois.Now
t
hei
rpl
anf
ail
edandwhosuf
fer
edmost
i
tsy
ou!I
’
m sur
ewher
everhei
shei
s
f
ucki
nghoesbl
oodyasshol
ear
ghnx
a!”I
si
ghshe’
sri
ghtbutIcan’
tbl
amehi
m
onl
yIal
sowant
edt
obr
ingKhumal
o
downhenev
erpul
l
edagunt
ofor
ceme
t
obr
ingKhumal
odown.I
m ast
upi
d
nai
vebl
i
ndgi
rlwhof
all
forhi
schar
ms
andnowIl
ostmymot
herduet
omy
st
upi
dit
y!
“
HeyI
’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
tmeant
ohur
tyouI
wasj
ustsay
ing.I
’
m sor
ryi
fIhur
tyou”I
di
dn’
tev
enr
eal
i
zeIwascr
ying,
shepul
l
s
mei
ntoherar
ms.Isi
nki
ntoher
embr
ace.
“
Iwi
shy
oucoul
dseey
our
sel
finmy
ey
esMuuj
i
za,
youar
ebeaut
if
ul,
i
ntel
l
igent
,goodhear
ted,
sex
yladywho
deser
vesnot
hingbutal
lthegr
eat
est
t
hingsl
i
fecanof
fer
.Iwi
shIcant
ake
awayal
lyourpai
nandmakei
tmi
ne.
Youhav
ebeent
hroughal
oty
oudeser
ve
somehappi
nesst
oo.Yourpr
esencei
n
ourl
i
vesbr
oughtnot
hingbutj
oy.Iwi
sh
wecanr
ubof
fthatj
oyt
oyouaswel
l
.”
“
I’
m bl
essedt
ohav
eyouguy
sIwi
l
l
f
orev
erbei
ndebt
edt
oy’
al
l”
“
Heyy
oudon’
toweusany
thi
ngpl
ease
don’
tyoudar
efeel
indebt
edt
ous.
”
“
ButSt
ar…”
”
NoMuuj
i
zay
ouar
eoneofusandy
ou
don’
toweusanyshi
t!
”Ichuckl
eandpul
l
back.Shewi
pesmyt
ear
s
“
Iwantt
oki
ssy
ousobadr
ightnowbut
y
ourf
atheri
swat
chi
ngus”wegi
ggl
e
“
Star
?”
“
BooBear
”
“
Whatar
ewe?
”Sher
eleaseasi
gh
“
Ninakupendananat
akakuwaz
aidi
ya
dadat
ukwakol
aki
ninaj
uasasahi
vi
hunahal
iyakuwakat
ikauhusi
anohi
vyo
si
kumki
mbi
l
ia”(
Ilov
eyouandIwantt
o
bemor
ethanj
ustasi
stert
oyoubutI
knowr
ightnowy
ouar
enoti
nast
ateof
bei
ngi
nar
elat
ionshi
phenceIdon'
trush
y
ou)IknowwhenshespeaksSwahi
l
i
she’
sser
iousandi
t’
sfunnybecauseher
mot
her
’sl
anguagei
sisi
Zul
u.Igaspwi
th
shockIwasn’
tex
pect
ingt
hisdon’
tev
en
askmewhatIwasex
pect
ingbecauseI
knowt
hatSt
ari
sal
esbi
an,
yesshet
old
meandwhenshef
ir
sti
nit
iat
edsexi
t
di
dn’
tcr
ossmymi
ndt
hatshewi
l
lfal
lfor
me.Iwasenj
oyi
ngwhatshewasdoi
ng
t
omei
tshi
ft
edmeawayf
rom mypai
n.I
t
hinki
twasherwayoft
ryi
ngt
odi
str
act
mebecausesomet
imesshedoesn’
t
knowwhatt
odot
omakemef
eel
bet
ter
.
“
Iheary
ouSt
arandy
ouar
eri
ghtI
’
m not
i
nast
atet
obei
nar
elat
ionshi
pbesi
de
t
hef
actt
hatI
’
m st
il
lhungupon
Lwenkosi
I’
m notsur
eifIwantt
obei
na
r
elat
ionshi
pwi
thagi
rlnott
hatt
her
e’s
somet
hingwr
ongwi
thi
tbuti
t’
s
somet
hingIhav
enev
ert
houghtabouti
t”
shechuckl
es
“
Iunder
standandwhi
l
eyouar
ethi
nki
ng
andget
ti
ngy
our
sel
fint
her
ightst
ateof
mi
ndt
hebenef
it
sar
est
il
lon”If
eel
her
handunder
neat
hmydr
esscuppi
ngmy
pussy
.
“
Star
”Imoan
“
BooBear
”sheni
bbl
esmyear
lobe
“
Wear
einpubl
i
cyoucan’
tdot
his”
“
Let
’sgetoutofher
e”shewhi
sper
sin
myearsendi
ngchi
l
lsdownmyspi
ne.

Thr
oughmysl
eepIcanf
eel
he’
snot
nex
ttomeasIf
eel
theempt
inessonhi
s
si
deoft
hebed.Ibl
i
nkmyey
esopen
he’
sreal
l
ynotwi
thme.I
’
m soex
haust
ed
andmybodyi
ssor
emymankeptme
t
hewhol
eni
ght
.Ican’
tkeepupwi
thhi
s
sex
ual
appet
it
eyesesandt
het
hingshe
doest
omemakesmespeaksi
n
t
ounges.Isi
tonmybut
tandy
awn,
t
her
e’sanot
eont
hebedsi
det
abl
eI
smi
l
ebef
oret
aki
ngi
tandr
eadi
t.
‘
Sphal
aphal
asami
goodmor
ning.Lef
t
somef
ewhundr
edst
ospoi
lyour
sel
f.I
wi
l
lbebackl
atert
odaydon’
tcook
supperwear
eeat
ingout
.Il
ovey
ou
MaNcubewami
”Ismi
l
eandcountt
he
not
esi
t’
s2kIneedt
odomyhai
rand
nai
l
s.

Peopl
efal
li
nlov
einmy
ster
iousway
sI
t
ell
you.Inev
ert
houghtSoxandIwoul
d
f
all
inl
ovewi
theachot
her.That
’sonce
of
fsexcr
eat
edar
elat
ionshi
pbet
ween
us.Hehasbeenamaz
ingunempat
ho
shameumf
okaDl
amani
jeal
ousdown.
Mi
ra’
sdi
sappear
ancewasabl
essi
ngi
n
di
sgui
se,
It’
sbr
oughtSoxandIcl
oser
andt
odaywear
edeepl
yinl
ovewi
th
eachot
her
.Speaki
ngofMi
ramyhear
t
st
il
lbl
eeds.I
t’
sbeen4y
ear
ssi
nceshe
di
sappear
ed.Idon’
twantt
obel
i
evet
hat
she’
sdead.I
’
m dy
ingher
ewi
thouther
,
mom Bongai
sdr
owni
ngher
sel
fin
al
cohol
wit
houtMi
ra.Lwandl
eal
most
l
osthi
sli
feduet
odr
ugov
erdose.I
t’
s
beenahel
lof4y
ear
s.Idon’
tunder
stand
howcanaper
sonj
ustdi
sappearwi
thout
at
racenotunl
essi
fshe’
sdeadbutI
don’
twantt
othi
nkt
hat
.Mi
rai
sal
i
ve
onedayshewoul
dbef
ound,
shehast
o
comebackt
ous,
goshImi
ssherso
much.

Idr
agmy
sel
foutofbedandpul
lar
obe
t
henmaket
hebedbef
oregoi
ngt
othe
bat
hroom t
otakeashower
.Oncei
m
donewi
thmyhy
gienepr
ocessIget
dr
essedi
nav
ert
ical
nav
yandwhi
te
st
ri
pedt
uber
omperwi
thwhi
teNi
keai
r
sneaker
s.It
akemybaby
’scarkey
sand
myphoneandheadout
.Al
othas
happenedi
nthepastf
oury
ear
s.If
ail
ed
mybcom account
ingf
ort
woy
ear
s
r
espect
ivel
yanddadwentbal
l
ist
ic.
WhenIt
oldhi
mthatIwantj
our
nal
i
sm
het
oldmeov
erhi
sdeadbody
.I
pr
otest
edsohedi
sownedmeandmy
mom di
dn’
tst
andupt
ohi
mforme.Sox
camet
hroughf
ormeandf
etchedme.
Hedi
dn’
twantt
odi
srespecthi
smom so
hegotmeanapar
tmentandwehav
e
beenst
ayi
ngt
oget
her
.WhatIl
i
keabout
hi
mist
hathe’
sagoget
ter
.Khumal
o’s
deat
hki
ndaaf
fect
edhi
sincomebuthe
wassav
ingandnowheownsagr
il
land
pubandcarwash.Ij
ustst
art
eddoi
ng
myf
ir
sty
eari
njour
nal
i
sm atDUTand
he’
spay
ingf
ormyst
udi
esIcoul
dn’
tbe
happi
erandgr
atef
ulenough.
“
MaNcubewami
”Ismi
l
e
“
Dlami
nihowar
eyou”
“
I’
m wel
lthanksandy
ou?
”
“
I’
m al
sof
inet
hanksf
ormoney
”
“
It
’snot
hingmybaby
…ar
eyoudr
ivi
ng?
”
“
YesI
’
m dr
ivi
ngt
othemal
ltohav
e
somebr
eakf
astanddomyhai
rand
nai
l
s”
“
Themoneyi
sgoi
ngt
obeenough?
”
“
Ofcour
se.
.wher
ear
eyout
aki
ngmet
o
t
oni
ght
”Iwantt
obuysomet
hingt
owear
Ij
ustwantt
olookgoodf
orhi
m,may
be
addasex
ynumber
.
“
It
’sasur
pri
sebaby
”
“
Okayt
ell
mewhatIshoul
dwear
?”
“
Smar
tcausal
”
“
Okayst
handwasami
Icantwai
t”
“
Meet
ooIhav
etogoIl
ovey
ou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Ihangupwi
thasmi
l
eon
myf
ace.I
’
m al
lsmi
l
eyunt
ilIwal
kint
o
t
her
est
aur
antandmysmi
l
evani
shes.
Theyar
egi
ggl
i
ngandki
ssi
ngev
erynow
andt
hen.If
eel
myangerbur
ningand
makemywayt
othem.
“
Hicuddl
escakeskamngani
wami
”
Theybot
hlookatme
“
Guguhel
l
o..
.Babyt
hisi
sGugu,
Gugu
t
hisi
smygi
rl
fr
iendAy
anda”
“
Nicet
omeety
ougugu”Ay
andachi
ck
say
s
“
Idon’
tcar
ewhot
hisbi
tchi
s!Al
lIcar
e
abouti
smybestf
ri
endwhoy
ouar
e
cheat
ingonr
ightnow!
”Lwandl
e
chuckl
esandshakeshi
shead
“
GuguI
m hav
ingabr
eakf
astwi
thmy
gi
rl
fr
iendpl
easego”
“
Wowy
ousuchanasshol
e!Mi
ral
oves
y
ouandt
hisi
swhaty
oudot
oher
!”
“
Wher
eissheGuguhuh?Doy
ouseeher
ar
ound?Uphi
?”
“
She’
smi
ssi
ngbecauseofy
ou!Thi
sis
al
lyourf
aul
thady
ounotusemybest
f
ri
endf
ory
oursel
fi
shr
easonsshe
woul
dbeher
e!”
“
IknowwhatIneedwasnotr
ightbutI
l
ovedMi
ra!
”
”
Buty
oucoul
dn’
twai
tforheral
i
ttl
e
l
onger”
“
Youar
est
art
ingt
oir
ri
tat
emenow
Guguandf
ory
ouri
nfor
mat
iony
ourbest
f
ri
enddumpedmebef
oreshe
di
sappear
edshemov
edonasky
our
boy
fri
endhewi
l
ltel
lyou!Babyl
et’
sgo”
Heget
supwi
thhi
sgi
rl
fr
iendandwal
k
awayl
eav
ingmewonder
ingwhatdi
dhe
mean.I
’
m soangr
yIhav
eev
enl
ostmy
appet
it
e.Igot
othesal
ont
odomyhai
r
andnai
l
s.Ioptf
ort
hinl
ongt
wistwhi
ch
i
sresul
tsofmespendi
ngal
mostt
he
whol
edayi
nthesal
on.OnceI
’
m doneI
got
obuyadr
essandheadt
oourpl
ace.
Ical
lhi
mtoconf
ir
mti
meandhesay
she
wi
l
lpi
ckmeupat7pm.Af
terIt
akea
l
ongbat
hIwearapi
nkseet
hrough
cr
ochetsl
eev
ecutoutbody
condr
ess
wi
thbai
gesandal
sheel
s.Ichoose
nat
ural
lookwi
thar
edl
i
pst
ickonl
y.My
t
wisti
sti
edi
ntoaneatbun,
ImustsayI
l
ookr
avi
shi
ng.Byt
het
imeIf
ini
shwi
th
ev
ery
thi
ngSoxar
ri
ves.
“
Damnbabyy
oul
ookst
unni
ng”
“
Thanky
oubaby
”Ibl
ush
“
Letmegohi
tashowert
henwewi
l
lgo”
Heki
ssesmyl
i
psandr
unst
othe
bat
hroom.Hal
fanhourhe’
sdoneand
l
ookshoti
nhi
sgr
eychi
no,
brown
l
oaf
ers,
whi
teshi
rtandgr
eycoat
.
“
Let
’sgobaby
”Het
akesmyhandi
nto
hi
sandweheadout
.Thedr
ivei
sfi
l
led
wi
thsmal
ltal
ksandbi
tofl
aught
er.
Whenhear
ri
vet
oourdest
inat
ionhe
openst
hedoorf
ormeandt
akesmy
hand,
leadi
ngmet
other
est
aur
ant
.We
set
tl
edowni
nourt
abl
eandhecal
l
sa
wai
tert
otakeouror
der
“
Thi
sisbeaut
if
ulbabyt
hanky
ouso
much”
“
Youar
ewel
comebaby
..
.t
ell
meabout
y
ourday
”
“
ArghLwandl
elwenkosi
almostspoi
l
ed
myday
”Igoonandt
ell
him what
happened
“
That
’sbast
ardnev
erl
ovedMi
raf
rom
t
hef
ir
stpl
ace”
“
Exact
lymyl
oveandhesai
dMi
ra
dumpedherandmov
eon,
youknow
aboutt
hat”Hecl
ear
shi
sthr
oat
“
Idon’
tknowwhathe’
stal
ki
ngabout
y
angi
bhedel
anj
e!”
“
I’
m sol
uckyt
ohav
eyoui
nmyl
i
fe”
“
It
’st
heot
herwayar
oundbaby
”He
t
akesmyhandsandpl
antpeckson
t
hem.Ourf
oodi
sbr
oughtt
ousandwe
eatov
erawar
m chat
terandl
aught
er.
Wear
eeat
ingdeser
tnowIf
eel
somet
hingi
nmymout
handspi
tsi
tof
f.
I
t’
sabeaut
if
ulr
ingwi
thapi
nkgor
geous
sapphi
reandsur
roundofr
oundcut
di
amonds.Il
ookatSoxandhe’
sont
he
f
loorwi
thoneknee.I
sthi
swhatIt
hinki
t
i
s?
“
MaNcubey
ouknowI
’
m notamanof
wor
dsbutwhatIknowi
sthatev
ersi
nce
y
ouwal
kedi
nmyl
i
feIhav
ebeent
he
happyandIdon’
tseemy
sel
fli
vi
ng
wi
thouty
ou.Il
ovey
ousomuchGugu
pl
easemakemet
hehappi
estmani
nthe
uni
ver
seandmar
ryme”Ev
ery
onei
s
cheer
ingandsay
ingIshoul
dsayy
es
“
YessIwi
l
lmar
ryy
ou”
Inodv
igor
ousl
y
wi
thmyheadast
ear
sst
ream downmy
f
ace.Hesl
i
det
her
ingi
nmyf
ingerand
ki
ssest
hel
i
vingshi
toutofme.Ihav
eno
doubtt
hatt
hisi
swhatIwant
.Il
ovehi
m
andhel
ovesmewewoul
dmakeagood
husbandandwi
fe.Gugul
ethuDl
ami
ni
i
t’
shasni
cer
ingneh.
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayLeendowkucl
e
Lee&Mi
l
dredLest
oko

CHAPTER34

Thedr
ivei
sawf
ull
yqui
et.Ikeep
gl
anci
ngather
,Icanseet
hatshe’
smad.
Isqueez
ehert
highbutsher
emov
esmy
handf
rom hert
high
“
BabyI
’
m sor
ry”I
'
m notev
ensur
ewhy
I
'
m apol
ogi
zi
ng,
it’
snotmyf
aul
tGugu
camet
ouswhi
l
ewewer
ehav
ingour
br
eakf
astt
othr
owsomet
ant
rums.I
don’
tunder
standwhatsheex
pect
edme
t
odo.Iwai
tedf
orMi
raf
or4y
ear
snowI
t
hinki
twasaboutt
imeImov
edont
oo.
YesIwon’
tli
eandsayInol
ongerl
ove
herbutshe’
sgone,
li
fehast
ogoonat
somepoi
nt.
“
Okay
”
“
Babycomeon”
“
WhatLwandl
e!!
”
“
Don’
tyoudar
eshoutatme!Idon’
t
under
standwhyy
ou'
remad”
“
Your
eal
l
ydon’
tknowy
oual
l
owedt
hat
skankt
ocal
lmeabi
tchLwandl
e”
“
All
owedherhow,
Itol
dhert
ofuckof
f
mos”
“
Takemehome”
“
Ayandacomeon,
yout
oldmypar
ent
s
y
ouwi
l
lgot
omor
rownj
e”
”
Aychangeofpl
ans”
“
Babyy
ouar
ebei
ngunf
airIdon’
t
under
standwhyam Ibei
ngpuni
shed,
whathav
eIdone?
”Shebur
stsi
ntot
ear
s.
Isi
ghandpul
lov
ert
henpul
lhercl
oset
o
me
“
Heydon’
tcr
y”
“
IthoughtIwon’
tfal
li
nlov
eagai
naf
ter
whatmyexboy
fri
enddi
dbuty
ou
changedev
ery
thi
ngandI
’
m scar
ed
Lwandl
e,pl
easedon’
thur
tmeIl
ove
y
ou”
“
Ial
sol
ovey
oubabyandy
ouwi
l
lnev
er
l
oseme”
“
Eveni
fMi
racomesback”
“
YesI
’
m wi
thy
ounowbabyandnot
hing
i
sgoi
ngt
ocomebet
weenus.Don’
t
al
l
owGugut
ogett
oyouokay
”Shenods
Ipul
lherawayandIwi
pehert
ear
s.
“
Ilov
eyouy
ezwa”
“
Ilov
eyouy
oo”Weki
ss
“
Wear
est
il
lgoi
nghomer
ight
?”She
nods,
Ist
artt
hecaranddr
ivehomewi
th
myot
herhandi
nter
twi
nedwi
thher
s.
Di
nnerwentwel
ll
astni
ght
,thepar
ent
s
l
i
kemyYay
aex
ceptSnoshehad
at
ti
tudet
hroughoutt
hedi
nnerandI
don’
tunder
standwhy
.Wear
ri
veat
homeandf
oundmom andSnobaki
ng
whi
l
eMal
umei
swat
chi
ngt
hem.Thei
r
r
elat
ionshi
pisbackt
owhati
tuset
obe
nowandI
’
m gl
ad.Ican’
thav
emy
f
avor
it
epeopl
efi
ght
ingeachot
her
.We
ex
changedgr
eet
ings.
“
Mal
umet
hisi
sAy
anda,
Yay
athi
sismy
uncl
e”
“
Hel
l
oAy
anda”
“
Greet
ings”
“
Yebo.
.Ni
cet
omeety
ouAy
anda”Yay
a
pul
l
southerhandbutmal
umehugsher
.
“
Youhav
egoodchoi
cemyboy
,she’
s
beaut
if
ul”
“
ButMi
rai
smor
ebeaut
if
ul”Il
ookat
Yay
aandgi
veher‘
don’
tmi
ndher
’look.I
t
hinkt
hischi
l
dreachedt
headol
escence
st
agepr
emat
urel
y.She’
s10.
“
Snot
hando”Mom war
ns
“
Buti
t’
sthet
rut
hmommy
”
“
Snot
handongi
zokushay
a!”
“
Iwaski
ddi
ng,
I'
m sor
ryYay
a.Youar
e
beaut
if
uly
ezwanez
ihl
athi
ezi
nkul
u
ngat
hiubhov
awamaphoy
isa”(
wit
hyour
f
atcheeksl
i
keapol
i
ce’
sdog)wi
tht
hat
sai
dsher
unsourgi
ggl
i
ngwhi
l
emama
i
scal
l
ingherout
.
“
Uyaphaphal
oumshay
ewenaAy
anda”
Yay
anodsherheadwi
thaf
akesmi
l
e.I
l
ookupatMal
umeandIcanseet
hat
he’
sst
if
li
ngal
augh.OhI
’
m not
sur
pri
sed!

Ir
oll
overandbumpi
ntosomeoneand
myey
esopensi
mmedi
atel
y,Isi
ghwi
th
r
eli
efwhenIseeherf
ace.I
’
m usedt
o
sl
eepi
ngal
onenowandIf
orgott
hatI
sl
eptwi
thmymot
her
.Act
ual
l
yIt
hought
ev
ery
thi
ngt
hathappenedy
est
erdaywas
dr
eam,
Iwoul
dwakeupf
rom.It
akea
goodl
ookatherasshe’
ssl
eepi
ng
peacef
ull
y,mymom i
sthemost
beaut
if
ulwomanIev
erseen,
she’
sagi
ng
gr
acef
ull
y.Idon’
tunder
standwhydad
mar
ri
edasecondwi
fer
eal
l
y.Imean
wi
thabeaut
yli
ket
his,
wit
hbr
ainsand
wi
sdom,
apr
ayerwar
ri
or,
ohIwoul
d
hav
efel
tbl
essedt
ohav
eherasmywi
fe
i
fIwer
edadbutheyt
hatmani
scat
’s
shi
t.Isl
i
deoutofbedcar
eful
l
ytonot
wakeherup.Wespental
mostt
hewhol
e
ni
ghtt
alki
ng,
cry
ingandl
aughi
ng.Idon’
t
knowwhati
twi
l
ltakef
ormet
obel
i
eve
she’
sreal
l
yher
e.Mymom i
sreal
l
yher
e,
I
’
m sot
hankf
ult
oKhuz
ani
.Ihav
etocal
l
hi
m andt
hankhi
m.Iwal
ktot
he
bat
hroom t
otakeashower
,onceI
’
m
doneIl
oti
onmybodyandwearar
obe
t
hensl
i
demysl
i
pper
s.Iwantt
omake
mymom br
eakf
asti
nbedbutIneeda
dr
inkf
ir
st.It
akemyv
odkai
nal
i
quor
cabi
netandpouri
tint
hegl
ass.

“
Don'
tev
ent
hinkabouti
t”Mom say
sas
I
’
m aboutt
ogul
pital
ldown.Il
ookather
andf
akeasmi
l
e
“
Youar
eawake”Iputt
hegl
assdown
“
Ofcour
seI
'
m awake.I
t’
s9o’
cl
ocki
n
t
hemor
ningNonoandal
readyy
ouar
e
dr
inki
ngal
cohol
”It
aket
hebot
tl
eand
r
eadi
t
“
Idon’
tseeany
thi
ngwr
it
tenaboutwhat
t
imeorwhenshoul
dwedr
inki
t”
“
Nonopl
easeKhuz
ani
tol
dmet
hatev
er
si
nceMi
rawentmi
ssi
ngy
ouar
e
dr
owni
ngy
our
sel
final
cohol
that
’snot
r
ightmt
anami
”
“
Isn’
tther
eat
hingKhuz
ani
didn’
ttel
lyou
huh”myv
oicei
slacedwi
thannoy
ance.
“
He’
swor
ri
edabouty
oubaby
,soam I
.
St
opt
hispl
ease,
Ican’
tal
l
owy
out
o
dr
owny
our
sel
final
cohol
”Shet
akesmy
gl
assanddi
scar
dthev
odkai
nthesi
nk
“
Maa!
”
“
Hay
iNokubonga!Youwantt
oki
l
l
y
our
sel
fwi
thal
cohol
huh?I
t’
sbeen4
y
ear
sugi
xananot
swal
a,hasi
tev
er
cr
ossedy
ourmi
ndwhatdoest
his
consumpt
ionofal
cohol
doest
oyour
bodyhuh?
”Sheopenst
hel
i
quorcabi
net
“
Nonoy
ouar
eoutl
i
ne!Youj
ustwal
ked
i
nmyl
i
fef
orl
i
kewhat
,3seconds
al
readyy
ouar
ecomf
ort
abl
etot
ell
me
whatt
odoandwhatnot
odo!
”
”
I’
myourmot
her
!Igav
ebi
rt
htoy
ouI
hav
eev
eryr
ightt
otel
lyouwhatt
odo!
l”
shet
akest
hebot
tl
eofv
odkaandempt
y
i
tint
hesi
nk
“
Dammi
tmaanMama!
”Shet
akesmy
husband’
swhi
skey
“
Don’
tyoudar
e!That
’smyhusband
whi
skey
!”
“
Idon’
tcar
eNokubongahe’
sdeadwhen
wi
l
lhedr
inkal
ltheseal
cohol
huh?You
ar
etheonewhowi
l
lendupdr
inki
ngal
l
oft
hesebot
tl
es!
”Shesmashesal
lmy
husband’
sex
pensi
vewi
neont
hef
loor
spat
ter
ingt
hewhi
skeyal
lov
ert
hef
loor
“
GodMadoy
ouknowhowmucht
hese
whi
skey
scost
!!
”
“
Idon’
tcar
e!Doy
ouhearme,
Idon’
t
car
e!”I
’
mfumi
ngwi
thangeri
fshe
wasn’
tmymot
herIwoul
dhav
eback
sl
appedher
.
“
He’
sdead,
hemustdi
ewi
thhi
s
al
cohol
!!
”
“
Whyar
eyoui
nsensi
ti
ve!
”
“
Insensi
ti
ve?OhI
’
m sor
rymychi
l
dbutI
won’
tbesensi
ti
vet
oadogt
hatabused
mydaught
er!
”Weshar
edal
otl
astni
ght
Iev
ent
oldheraboutKhumal
o.I
thas
nev
erbeenaneasyt
opi
ctot
alkabout
buti
tfel
tgoodt
oshar
ewi
thherabouti
t
butnowshe’
smaki
ngmeangr
y.
“
Iwon’
tli
stent
oyoucr
uci
fyi
ngmy
husband.
.”
“
Hewasawomanbeat
eramonst
erofa
man!
”
“
Iref
usedt
oseehi
m asamonst
er,
Khumal
owasev
ery
thi
ngy
ouandy
our
husbandwoul
dev
erbet
ome.Hegav
e
mel
ove,
car
e,l
i
fe,
war
mthandahome.
Notonl
ydi
dheacceptmebutmy
daught
eraswel
l
!Youar
ethef
ineonet
o
cr
uci
fymyhusbandwhi
l
eyouwer
e
al
way
sdef
endi
ngy
ourhusband.Don’
t
comeher
ewi
th“
amonst
ert
hatabused
mydaught
er”whi
l
eyouwat
chedy
our
husbandabuseme!Youwat
chedhi
m
beatmeupl
i
keIwasnohuman!
”
“
Youwer
erebel
l
iousNokubonga,
you
want
edhi
mtot
hanky
ouf
or
di
srespect
inghi
m?”
“
Disr
espect
inghi
m byaski
nghi
m why
washegi
vi
nghi
sot
herf
ami
l
yspeci
al
t
reat
ment
?Iwasdi
srespect
inghi
m
whenIt
oldhi
mthathedoesn’
tcar
e
aboutus?Iwasdi
srespect
inghi
m when
Iaskedhi
m whywashebuy
ingt
heni
ce
t
hingsf
ort
heot
herf
ami
l
ybutnotus?
Wewor
eragsmamawhi
l
eabo
Nont
ethel
elower
ewear
ingl
abel
s.
Wal
kedbar
efootwhi
l
ehi
sot
herchi
l
dren
hadshoest
owear
.Your
ememberhow
y
ouusedt
osewmypant
iesandt
his
ot
herdayIgoti
naf
ightatschool
and
somehowmypant
ieswasex
posed.I
wasmockedf
ormont
hsatschool
.Bet
hi
ngi
qokai
pent
iel
i
peshi
wedoy
ouknow
howhur
tandembar
rassedIwas.Asi
f
t
hatwasnotenoughy
ourhusband
f
oundoutandhebeatt
heshi
toutofme
f
or“
embar
rassi
nghi
m”whi
l
ehewast
he
onewhowasnott
aki
ngcar
eofus!We
wer
esuf
fer
ingandpoorwhi
l
edadwas
wor
kingandt
aki
ngcar
eofhi
sot
her
f
ami
l
yinf
rontofusMama.Theyat
eal
l
t
heni
cet
hingsabochi
ckenl
i
ckenwhi
l
e
weat
ecabbage.Theonl
yti
mehewoul
d
buyuschi
ckenwaswhenhewant
edt
o
sl
eepi
nourhouse.Akukhohl
i
se
ngol
amt
hut
hungobaef
una
ukukbhebha!
”Shecat
chesmeof
fguar
d
wi
thahugesl
apt
hatmakesmesee
st
ars.Tear
sinv
olunt
ari
l
yst
ream down
myf
ace.Herl
i
psar
etr
embl
i
ngandt
ear
s
ar
efl
owi
ngdownherf
acebutI
’
m not
done
“
Myhusbandmaybeamonst
erasy
ou
saybuthewasabet
termant
heny
our
husband.Hewassuppor
ti
ngusand
maki
ngsur
ethatwehav
eev
ery
thi
ng
t
hatweneeded.Hewoul
dtur
nthewor
ld
upsi
dedownf
orus.Khumal
owami
knewt
hatamanhast
opr
ovi
def
orhi
s
f
ami
l
y.Hewasagr
eatmant
hatwas
f
ail
edbyhi
sfat
herwhowasabusi
ng
hi
m mom j
ustl
i
kehowmyf
atherf
ail
ed
me.I
fmydadwasn’
tthemanhewas
noneoft
hiswoul
dhav
ehappened.I
woul
dhav
enotwant
edt
osl
eepwi
th
Mf
ani
seni
tomakeNont
ethel
elopay
.I
woul
dn’
thav
egot
tenpr
egnantandI
woul
dn’
thav
ebeenchasedoutofhome.
Youhav
enoi
deahowhar
ditwasf
orme
outt
her
eont
hest
reetandpr
egnant
.I
knowt
haty
oudi
dn’
tsendmet
oopen
myl
egsf
orMf
ani
seni
butt
hatdoesn’
t
changet
hef
actt
hatIneededy
ouasmy
mot
her
.Iwasal
one,
pregnant
,conf
used
andhomel
ess.Ineededy
out
ohol
dme
i
nyourar
msandt
ell
met
hati
twoul
dbe
okay
.Mypr
egnancywashel
land
compl
i
cat
edIwasi
nandoutofhospi
tal
asi
fthatwasnotst
ressf
ulenoughMi
ra
t
urnedoutt
obebl
i
nd.Iwasbey
ond
di
sor
ient
edIwonder
edi
fIwasev
er
goi
ngt
obeabl
etot
akecar
eofher
.I
r
ememberhowscar
edIwast
odr
own
herwhenIbat
hedher
.Iwi
shedy
ouwer
e
t
her
ewi
thmet
oshowmehowi
t’
sdone.
Iwi
shy
ouwer
ether
eformemommy
buty
ouwer
enev
ert
her
eIwasal
l
al
one.
”Iwi
pemyt
ear
svi
gor
ousl
yand
makemywayt
oMi
ra’
sbedr
oom and
t
akeMi
ra’
syel
l
owdr
esswhi
chwasher
f
avor
it
eandcr
awl
ont
hebedsqueez
ing
i
tinmypal
ms.Herscentoni
tisf
aint
andt
hatbr
eaksmyhear
t.

I
’
m wokenupbyaheav
ypr
esenceand
f
inger
ti
psr
unni
ngonmyf
ace.Ibl
i
nkmy
ey
esopenandt
heymeethi
spai
r,af
aint
smi
l
etugst
hecor
ner
sofhi
sli
ps.
“
Hey
”it
’sal
mostawhi
sper
“
Hi”Isaygr
oggi
l
y
“
I’
m sor
ryi
fIwakey
ouup”
“
Whatt
imei
sit
?”
“
16:
00pm”IgaspIsl
eptt
hatl
ong.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
eveIsl
eptt
hatl
ong”
“
Yourbodyneededt
oresty
ouar
e
car
ryi
ngt
oomuchst
ress”Isi
ghandsi
t
onmybut
t.
“
Idi
dn’
tgetachancet
othanky
ouf
or
f
indi
ngmymot
her
”
“
Don'
tment
ioni
t”Ther
e’samomentof
si
l
enceandhe’
sgaz
eispi
erci
ngonmy
ski
n
“
Whati
sit
”
“
I’
m pr
oudofy
ou,
thaty
oudi
dn’
ttouch
al
cohol
today
”
“
Howdoy
ouknowt
hat
,mom t
oldy
ouor
y
oust
il
lhav
ecamer
asi
nst
all
edi
nmy
house”Iseehur
tfl
ashi
ngacr
osshi
s
ey
esashecl
encheshi
sjawsIcan’
thel
p
butnot
icehowawf
ulIf
eel
aft
ersay
ing
t
hat
.
“
I’
m sor
ry,
Idi
dn’
t…”
“
Noi
t’
sfi
neIunder
standandnoy
our
mom di
dn’
ttel
lmeIcanseet
haty
ouar
e
soberandy
ouar
enotr
eeki
ngof
al
cohol
”Inodmyhead
“
Gqokasambe”(
Getdr
essedandl
et’
s
go)
“
Wher
ear
ewegoi
ng?
”
“
Ain’
tyouhungr
y”
”
Ihav
en’
teat
ent
hewhol
edaysoy
es”
“
GoodIwi
l
lwai
tfory
ou”Heget
sup
f
rom t
hebedandheadoutl
eav
inghi
s
di
vi
nescentl
i
nger
ingi
nther
oom.Isl
i
de
outofbedandf
reshenupt
henget
dr
essedi
namax
idr
essandsandal
sI
compl
etet
hel
ookwi
thacar
digan.I
br
ushmyweav
eandl
eti
tlooset
hen
headout
.If
indhi
m wai
ti
ngf
ormei
nthe
l
ounge.
“
I’
m done”Heget
sup
“
Let
’sgo”
“
Letmecheckonmom f
ir
st”
“
She’
satmymom’
spl
ace”
“
Oh”
“
Yeahdon’
twor
ryshe’
sinsaf
ehands.
Theywi
l
ldef
ini
tel
ycl
i
ck”weheadout
.
Heopenshi
sJXJaguarf
ormeandIget
i
nhewal
kst
ohi
ssi
deaf
tercl
osi
ngt
he
door
.Thedr
ivei
sfi
l
ledwi
thcomf
ort
abl
e
si
l
enceandi
t’
staki
ngl
ongert
henI
ex
pect
ed.Fi
nal
l
ywear
ri
vedatour
dest
inat
ion,
forsomer
easonhi
shandi
s
i
nter
twi
nedwi
thmi
neaswemakeour
wayt
othi
sbui
l
ding,
ther
ear
eredr
oses
maki
ngapat
hwayt
othecandl
eli
ght
di
nnert
abl
e.
“
Ithoughtwear
egoi
ngoutt
ojustt
oeat
Khuz
ani
”Isayl
ooki
ngathi
m
“
Ofcour
set
her
e’spl
ent
yoff
oodcome”
“
Youdi
dn’
ttel
lmei
t’
sacandl
eli
ght
di
nner
”
“
Whatdi
ff
erenti
twoul
dhav
eanmade”
Hel
ooksatmewi
thasi
desmi
l
e
“
Godr
eal
l
y,whatki
ndofamanar
eyou,
ambushi
ngawomanwi
thcandl
eli
ght
di
nner
.Your
obbedmeachancet
o
pr
epar
emy
sel
f!
”Hechuckl
es
“
I’
m sor
ry,
youdon’
thav
etoshout
”
“
LookatmeI
’
mjustwear
ingamax
i
dr
ess”
“
Youar
ebeaut
if
ulev
eni
fyoucoul
d
wearr
agsy
ou’
dst
il
lbet
hemost
beaut
if
ulwomanIhav
eev
erl
aidmy
ey
eson”ar
ghhe’
ssuchachar
mer
“
Come”wemakeourwayt
oourt
abl
e
andhepul
l
sachai
rformeandpushi
t
backaf
terIsatdown.Hesi
tsdownt
oo
andsnaphi
sfi
nger
s.Thewai
terappear
s
andser
vesusmyf
avor
it
e.Ist
il
lwonder
howdoest
hismanknoweachanev
ery
l
i
ttl
eaboutme.
“
Howwasy
ourday
”Heasksawhi
l
e
l
ateraf
terwest
art
edeat
ing,
ther
e’ssof
t
musi
cpl
ayi
ngi
nthebackgr
ound
“
It
’swasokay
”Ishr
ug
“
Youdon’
thav
etopr
etendwi
thme”I
si
gh
“
Idon’
tknowhowi
twasbecauseIwas
sl
eepi
ngt
hewhol
eday
.”
“
Isee,
arey
ouhappyt
haty
ourmom i
s
her
e”
“
Yesherpr
esencei
nmyl
i
febr
ought
hopeandt
hanky
ouf
ort
hatbuti
t’
sal
so
ev
okedsomef
eel
i
ngsIt
houghtIhav
e
bur
iedl
ongt
imeago”
“
Icani
magi
nebutIhopey
out
wowi
l
l
wor
kthi
ngsout
.Youneedeachot
her
mor
ethenev
er”
“
Ithi
nkt
hatt
imei
swayov
ery
ouknow.
”
“
That
’snott
rueBongay
ouwi
l
lnev
er
st
opneedi
ngy
ourmom ev
eni
fyoucan
hav
egr
eyhai
randwr
inkl
es”Iheav
ea
si
gh,
he’
sri
ghtandIwoul
dbel
yi
ngi
fI
sayI
’
m nothappyt
hatshe’
sher
ebutI
t
hinksheneededt
ohearwhatIt
oldher
.
Ihav
ebeenbot
tl
ingupt
oomuchpai
n
i
nsi
de,
Itwast
imet
oof
fl
oad.
“
Shel
ovesy
ouknow”
“
Andy
ouknowt
hathow?
”Il
ookathi
m
t
hrought
her
im oft
hegl
ass
“
Icanseet
hatshel
ovesy
ou”
“
MmhIseet
hat
’swhyy
ouar
egossi
ping
aboutmewi
thher
”Hegi
ggl
es
“
Gossi
ping,
me,
nev
er”
“
Yout
oldheraboutMi
raandmy
dr
inki
ng”
“
Ahphel
abengi
funai
sal
ukaz
i
si
zi
lungi
sel
elengesi
zokuf
icay
abo”(
I
want
edt
heol
dwomant
opr
epar
e
her
sel
f)
“
Hai
sukauwuv
ovol
i
yakhi
phawena”He
l
aughsandIj
oinhi
m.Ther
estofdi
nner
goeswel
lwi
thsweett
alkandl
aught
er.
Hi
sgaz
eonmei
sint
enseandIknowhe
wantt
osaysomet
hing.
“
Tel
lmewhat
evert
haty
ouwantt
osay
”
“
Ili
key
oubutIl
i
ket
hesoberBonga
mor
e.I
'
m soenj
oyi
nghercompany
”He
si
ghs
“
PleaseBonga,
I’
m beggi
ngy
ou,
doi
tfor
Mi
ra,
stopdr
inki
ng.Iwon’
tgi
veupon
herunt
ilIf
indherandIpr
omi
sedy
ouI
wi
l
lfi
ndherev
eni
fit
’sal
astt
hingIdo
butI
’
dhat
eforhert
ocomebackand
y
ouonl
yspentaf
ewy
ear
swi
thhert
hen
y
oudi
eduet
olungf
ail
ureorwhat
ever
di
seasesal
cohol
cancause.Youst
il
l
hav
etowal
kthatgi
rldownt
heai
sle,
you
st
il
lhav
etospoi
lyourgr
andchi
l
dren,
y
oust
il
lhav
etohav
etoseehermusi
c
car
eerbl
ossomi
ng.Ther
e’sal
oty
oust
il
l
hav
etodopl
easeI
’
m beggi
ngy
ou
kaMashwabada”Ial
l
owmyt
ear
stodo
t
het
alki
ng.Hegetupf
rom hi
schai
rand
comet
omysi
det
owi
pemyt
ear
sand
hugme.
“
Ngi
yax
oli
sangay
oyonkei
nto
enz
ekal
ayo”(
I’
m aboutev
ery
thi
ngt
hati
s
happeni
ng)
“
Youhav
eapol
ogi
zedenoughi
t’
sokay
”
Hesmi
l
eswi
del
ymov
inghi
sheadal
ong
musi
c
“
That
’smyj
am don’
tyouwantust
o
dance”Inodhet
akesmyhandandwe
dance,
wit
hmyonear
m onhi
sneckand
onehandi
nter
twi
nedwi
thhi
s.Wemov
e
al
ongmusi
casal
lmyt
omor
rowby
KennyLat
ti
mor
epl
ayi
ng.
“
All
myy
est
erday
s,al
lsobl
ue.
Day
sspentwai
ti
ng,
wai
ti
ngt
ofi
ndy
ou.
Nowt
hosesady
est
erday
s,t
hey
'r
esof
ar
behi
nd.
Anot
herl
i
fet
ime.
Si
gny
ournameonmyf
utur
e
Wr
it
eyournameonmyhear
t
Yourt
heonet
hatIneedi
nmyl
i
feand
myar
ms.
Al
lmyt
omor
rows,
they
'r
eal
lfory
ou.
Al
lofmyal
way
s,f
oral
lmywhol
eli
fe
t
hroughbabe.
'
Causey
ou'
ret
heoneIwant
,Iwantt
o
gi
vet
omor
rowt
oo.
You'
l
lal
way
shav
eal
lmyt
omor
rows.
They
'r
eal
lfory
ou.
Al
lyourev
ery
day
s,I
'
llbet
her
e.
You'
l
lhav
enodoubt
showmucht
hatI
cancar
e.
Ther
e'l
lnev
erbeadaywhenIl
eav
eyour
si
de,
noti
nthi
sli
fet
ime.
Wr
it
eyournameonmyf
utur
e,
Si
gny
ournameonmysoul
You'
ret
heonet
hatI
'
llhol
dforal
lti
me,
andI
'
m nev
ernev
erl
ett
ingy
ougo,
nono
baby'
cause.
..
Al
lmyt
omor
rows(
all
myt
omor
rows)
,
t
hey
'r
eal
lfory
ou.
Al
lmyt
omor
rows(
all
myt
omor
rows)
.
Al
lmyhear
tandmysoul
,al
lIhav
e,hav
e
i
tal
l
.
Al
lIev
erwi
l
lneedi
syouher
ewi
thme,
shar
ingwi
thme…”Hesi
ngi
ngal
ong
sof
tl
ylocki
nghi
sey
esonmi
neandIcan
seet
hathe’
sfeel
i
ngt
hesong.He’
snota
badsi
ngeract
ual
l
y,wedanceunt
ilt
he
endoft
hesongaf
tert
hatwel
eav
e.
“
Thanky
ouIhadagr
eatt
imewi
thy
ou”
Wear
eout
sidemygat
enex
ttohi
scar
say
ingourgoodby
e.
“
Met
oot
hanky
ou”Hepul
l
smei
ntohi
s
ar
msandIsi
nki
ntohi
sar
msi
nhal
i
ng
deepl
y.
“
I’
mleav
ingf
orCapeTownt
omor
row
mor
ning”Ipul
lbackwi
thoutbr
eaki
ng
t
hehugl
ooki
ngathi
m
“
Why
?”
“
Ihav
esomet
hingst
otakecar
eof
”
“
Whatt
hings?
”
“
Justt
hings”
“
Andwhyar
eyout
ell
i
ngmenow?
”
“
Ithoughty
ousai
dImustgoandhav
e
f
un”
“
Buty
ouwer
esupposet
otel
lme!
”
“
HawuBonga…”
“
DonthawuBongame!
!Youknowwhat
goandnev
ercomebacki
fyoudar
e
comebackmayt
hel
i
ght
ningst
ri
key
ou
y
ezwa!
”Iwi
ggl
emy
sel
foutofhi
s
embr
aceandwal
kawaywi
thhi
m cal
l
ing
me.Kl
awBonga,
KlawBongaukunuka!

Themomentwegeti
nmybedr
oom
whenwear
ri
veathomesheki
ssesme,
ourt
onguesmeetandgr
eetoneanot
her
.
Idon’
tfeel
comf
ort
abl
ewi
thAunt
y
Gabbyandt
hepar
ent
sbei
ngher
e.Ipul
l
back
“
Theadul
tsSt
ar”Weusual
l
ydot
his
whenwear
eal
oneoratni
ghtwhen
ev
ery
onei
ssl
eepi
ng.
“
Theyar
edownst
air
stheywon’
thearus”
Shesmashesherl
i
psanddev
our
sthem
l
i
keahungr
yani
mal
,asof
tmoan
escapemymout
h.Shepi
cksmeup
al
l
owi
ngmet
owr
apmyl
egsar
oundher
wai
stasShewal
kst
othebed.Shel
ay
usgent
lywi
thoutbr
eaki
ngt
heki
ss.Her
phoner
ings,
shei
gnor
esi
tbuti
t’
s
per
sist
ent
.
“
Answeri
tmay
bei
t’
simpor
tant
”
“
Hel
l
o..
Yesofcour
sewow!
..I
’
m so
ex
cit
edman!Thanky
ou!
!”Icanheari
n
herv
oicet
hatwhat
everi
tisi
t’
sgood
news
“
ThatwasmymanagerIhav
eagi
gin
CapeTownnex
tweek!
”St
ari
sadj
but
sheusual
l
ypl
aysl
ocal
it’
sherf
ir
stt
ime
get
ti
ngagi
goutoft
hecount
ry
“
Wowt
hatamaz
ingSt
ar!
”
“
FewOff
amousdj
swi
l
lbet
her
eand
may
benowIwi
l
lgetr
ecogni
ti
ony
ou
know!
”
“
YesI
’
m sopr
oudofy
ou!
”Isay
,I’
m
r
eal
l
yhappyf
orher
.Thewayshet
alks
aboutdi
j
ingy
oucant
ell
thati
t’
sher
passi
on.
“
Thanky
ousomuchIwantt
ocomewi
th
y
ou”
“
Youknowmyl
i
fei
sindangerIcan’
tgo
especi
all
ynoti
nSA!
”
“
BooBearpl
easewecanaskuncl
eto
or
gani
zeusbody
guar
ds.Iwantt
oshar
e
myhappi
nesswi
thy
ou.Iwanty
out
obe
t
her
ehearmepl
ayy
ouhav
enev
erhear
d
mepl
ayMuuj
i
za”
“
Hay
iSt
ary
ouknowt
hat
’si
mpossi
ble
wher
ewoul
dIbewheny
ouar
epl
ayi
ng?
”
“
Nex
ttome?
”
“
Hay
iI’
m sur
epeopl
ewoul
dbet
aki
ng
v
ideosandpostt
hem onsoci
al
net
wor
ksnononoSt
ar”
“
Letwai
tforuncl
etooutf
indi
fKhumal
o
i
sst
il
ll
ooki
ngf
ory
out
henwewi
l
lgo”
“
I’
m notgoi
ngSt
ar!
!”Ishoutwhycan’
t
shehearmegosh.St
arcanbepushy
andi
t’
sannoy
ing
“
Okayf
iney
oudon’
thav
etoshout
”I
heardi
sappoi
ntmenti
nherv
oiceand
t
hatmakesmef
eel
hor
ri
ble.If
eel
her
get
ti
ngupf
rom mebutIhol
dher
“
I’
m sor
ry”
“
It
’sf
ineIunder
standBooBearI
m sor
ry
f
orbei
ngpushyi
t’
sjustt
hatI
’
m ex
cit
edI
j
ustwant
edt
oshar
ethi
swi
thy
ou”
“
IknowandI
’
m sor
ry,
youhav
ebeen
gr
eatt
omeSt
ari
fwef
indoutKhumal
o
i
snotl
ooki
ngf
ormewewi
l
lgo”
“
Real
l
y!”
“
Yes!
”
“
Thanky
ou!
”Sheki
ssesme
“
Whatt
hef
ucki
sgoi
ngonher
e!”
Aunt
yGabby
’sv
oicescr
eams
“
Mom whydon’
tyouknock!
”
“
Heywenawhatt
hef
ucki
swr
ongwi
th
y
ou!Ar
eyoumadwhyt
hehel
lwoul
dyou
ki
ssher
!”
“
Mom Il
oveher
”
“
Lov
ehai
bongeke!
..
.”
“
Whyt
hehel
lar
eyoumaki
ngnoi
se”
Mom’
svoi
cesay
sandAunt
yGabbyt
ell
s
her
.I’
mfr
eaki
ngoutwhati
ftheyki
ckme
outoft
hei
rhouse.
“
Youseet
hisst
upi
dbl
i
ndgi
rli
s
ungr
atef
ulCabangi
l
eyout
ookheri
nand
nowshe’
ssl
eepi
ngwi
thmydaught
er!
”
Sst
upi
dbl
i
ndgi
rlechoesi
nmyear
s
“
Mamawhatt
hef
ucki
swr
ongwi
th
y
ou!
!”Shout
sSt
ar
“
I’
m sor
rymamapl
easedon'
tthr
owme
outIhav
enowher
etogo…,
”Aunt
y
Gabbycutmeof
f
“
Dontt
hrowmeoutmyf
oot
!Isi
tour
pr
obl
em t
hathav
enowher
etogohuh!
!”
“
Gabi
sil
eshutup!
!”Mom shout
sI’
min
t
ear
snow
“
NoCabangi
l
ethi
sli
tt
lesl
utneedst
ogo!
She’
sabusi
ngourki
ndness!I
tsnotour
f
aul
tthatsheki
l
ledhermot
her
.It
’sy
our
f
aul
tyourmom i
sdead.
..
”Icoul
dn’
t
l
i
stent
othi
shur
tful
wor
dsbutcr
y.Ihear
mom shout
ingathersi
steraswal
k
away
.St
art
ryt
ocomf
ortmebutIt
ell
herIwantt
obeal
one.Shedoesn’
t
pr
otestbutmakeherwayout
.
“
Stupi
dBl
i
ndGi
rl
!”
“
Youki
l
ledy
ourmot
her
!!
”Thewor
ds
l
i
nger
sinmyear
s.Ihav
eal
way
sknew
t
hatshedoesn’
tli
kemebutInev
er
t
houghtshewoul
dsayt
hat
.Herwor
ds
shat
ter
edev
eryl
i
ttl
esoul
lef
tinme
i
nsi
de.Howl
ongwi
l
lIl
i
vewi
tht
his
gui
l
tyandpai
n.Iwantt
odi
eIt
akemy
ant
idepr
essant
sonmybedsi
det
abl
e
t
hat
’swher
ewekeept
hem aswel
la
bot
tl
eofwat
er.I
t’
senoughIhav
ebeen
t
ryi
ngt
osur
viv
ewi
tht
hispai
nbutev
ery
br
eat
hisawarI
’
m notwi
nni
ng.
“
Muuj
i
za”Al
i
ttl
evoi
cesay
sIhi
det
he
pi
l
lsundert
hepi
l
low
“
Kamar
ia”If
eel
thebedmov
ingand
r
eal
i
zet
hatshe’
scl
i
mbi
ngont
opofi
t
“
Youar
ecr
ying”hear
inghersweetl
i
ttl
e
v
oicesay
ingt
hatmakesmyt
ear
sfal
l
mor
e
“
Don’
tcr
yit
’sgoi
ngt
obeokay
”If
eel
her
l
i
ttl
ehandswi
pingt
ear
sandhol
dher
t
inybodyi
nmyar
mssobbi
ngsi
l
ent
ly.
HappyBi
rt
hdayPhumel
eleZanokuhl
e
CHAPTER35

“
Uku
Ukushonakwel
anga
Kul
ethai
zi
nhl
unguz
odwa
Kul
ethai
zi
nsi
ziz
odwa
Uku
Ukuphumakwel
anga
Kul
ethai
ntokoz
onenj
abul
o

Thul
a
Thul
amamaungakhal
i
Sul
amamai
zi
nyembez
izakho
Umdal
iuz
osi
boni
sai
ndl
ela
Thul
a
Thul
amamaungakhal
i
Sul
amamai
zi
nyembez
izakho
Umdal
iuz
osi
boni
sai
ndl
ela
Thul
a”

Kamar
iai
ssi
ngi
ngf
ormeasI
’
mly
ing
wi
thmybackonmybedwi
thheront
op
ofme.Myt
ear
sar
erel
ent
lessl
yfal
l
ing
ont
hesi
desofmyf
ace.Thepowert
hat
hersweetangel
i
cvoi
cepossesi
s
bey
ondcompr
ehensi
on.I
t’
ssoot
hingmy
br
okensoul
,Icanf
eel
iti
nthedept
hof
mysoul
andhear
t.i
t’
ssoot
hingeachan
ev
erybl
eedi
ngwoundi
nmyhear
t.I
t’
s
moment
sli
ket
hist
hatr
emi
ndsoft
he
onesIuset
oshar
ewi
thmymot
her
.
Lor
dknowshowmuchImi
sst
hat
womanandhowmuchIwi
shIcant
ake
backt
hehandsoft
ime.Shoul
dIhav
e
knowni
twoul
dcomet
othi
spoi
nt,
I
woul
dhav
emadbet
terdeci
sions.Iwi
sh
l
i
fehadamanual
,I
twoul
dhav
ebeen
bet
ter
.Iti
ssai
dthatev
ery
onemake
mi
stakesandwehav
etol
ear
nfr
om
t
hem buti
t’
shar
dtor
ecov
erf
rom some
mi
stakes.Somemi
stakesl
eav
eyou
br
okenandempt
yli
keashel
lfort
her
est
ofy
ourl
i
fe.Theyl
eav
eper
manentscar
s
t
hatwi
l
lal
way
sbear
emi
nder
.Idon’
t
t
hinkI
’
m cutoutf
ort
hisl
i
febecauseI
don’
twantt
ohav
escar
sthat
’swi
l
l
r
emi
ndmeofmyst
upi
dit
y.

I
’
m notsur
pri
sedIf
ell
asl
eep,
that
’st
he
powert
hisl
i
ttl
epumpki
nsv
oiceposses.
I
tdr
if
tyouawayf
rom pai
nandsendy
ou
t
opeacef
ulsl
umber
.Icanst
il
lfeel
her
wei
ghtonme,
Icant
ell
she'
sal
sof
all
en
asl
eepbyherf
aintsnor
e.
“
Pumpki
n”Isaywi
thmyhoar
sev
oice
andt
her
e’snor
esponse,
she’
sasl
eep
i
ndeed.Ipl
acehernex
ttomeont
hebed
andr
unmyf
inger
sonherf
acebef
ore
pl
ant
ingaki
ssonherl
i
ps.Ihearaknock
andcl
earmyt
hroatbef
oreshout
ing
“
Comeoni
n”Iheart
hedooropeni
ng
andhersweetscentf
il
lsmyr
oom.If
eel
myhear
traci
ngohmydearl
ordi
t’
sov
er
wi
thmyl
i
fe.
“
Baby
”atl
eastI
’
m st
il
lbaby
“
Mama”Iwhi
sperandmyt
ear
sst
ream
downmyf
ace
“
Heydon’
tcr
ypl
ease”Shesi
tsnex
tto
meandpul
l
smet
oherar
ms
“
I’
m sor
rymom,
IknowIwasoutofl
i
ne.
Ishoul
dn’
thav
eal
l
owedwhat
evert
hati
s
happeni
ngbet
weenSt
arandI
.Youand
babat
ookmei
ngav
emehomebuther
e
Iam di
srespect
ingy
oui
nyourhouse.
I
t’
sokayi
fyouwantt
ochasemeoutof
y
ourhousebutpl
easedon’
t…”
“
I’
m notgoi
ngt
ochasey
ououtMuuj
i
za”
“
Real
l
y?”
“
Yesgi
vemeagoodr
easonwhyshoul
d
I
?”
“
Idi
srespect
edy
ouandbabai
nyour
house”
“
I’
m sor
rybutt
hat
’snotagoodenough
r
easonf
ormet
ochaseoutmydaught
er,
i
nfactIwi
l
lnev
erchaseoutmy
daught
ernomat
terwhatshehasdone.I
nev
erunder
standpar
ent
swhochase
outt
hei
rchi
l
drenoutoft
hei
rhouse.
Wher
edot
heyex
pectt
hechi
l
drent
o
go?
”Ohl
ordbl
esst
hiswoman’
shear
t.
Gr
antherwi
shesmydearl
ord,
youknow
hermi
ser
yandy
ouknowherdesi
res.
“
Iwon’
tli
etoy
ouandsayI
’
m happy
aboutwhathappenedbutt
hatdoesn’
t
meanIhav
etocr
uci
fyandki
cky
ouout
oft
hest
reet
.”
“
Ngi
yax
oli
saMama”(
I’
m sor
rymama)
“
It
’sokaybabybutIwantal
lthet
rut
h.
What
’shappeni
ngbet
weeny
ouand
St
ar?
”Isi
ghandt
ell
herev
ery
thi
ng
“
MmhbutIf
eel
li
keSt
ari
staki
ng
adv
ant
ageofy
ourv
ulner
abi
l
ityMuui
j
iza”
“
Nomamashe’
snot
,Ihav
enev
er
st
oppedher
”
“
Butsheshoul
dknowbet
terbaby
,St
ar
knowsy
ouar
egoi
ngt
hroughal
otr
ight
now.Youar
edepr
essedandwhen
y
ou’
redepr
essed,
yougr
aspont
o
any
thi
ngt
hatcangety
out
hrought
he
day
.”Isi
gh
“
I’
m sor
ryaboutwhatGabbysai
d,Idon’
t
getwhatherpr
obl
em i
s,sher
eal
l
yhas
i
ssues.St
handwasami
youdi
dn’
tki
l
l
y
ourmom norar
eyoust
upi
d.I
t’
snot
y
ourf
aul
tev
ery
thi
ngt
urnedt
heyway
t
heydi
d”
“
Butmom i
fI…”
“
Ther
ear
enobut
sMuui
j
iza,
ther
e’sno
chi
l
dwhowoul
dn’
tatl
eastt
ry
somet
hingt
osav
ethei
rmot
herf
rom
abuse.Don’
tdownpl
ayy
ourr
easons
behi
ndwhaty
oudi
dandi
t’
snoty
our
f
aul
tthatt
hingsdi
dn'
tgoasy
oupl
anned.
Iunder
standwhaty
ouar
egoi
ngt
hrough
Muuj
i
za.Iknowhowhar
diti
stocl
i
mb
outoft
hatdar
kpl
acebutIneedy
out
o
f
ightbabypl
easedoi
tfory
our
sel
fyou
needt
oov
ercomet
hisf
ory
our
sel
f.
”
“
It
’shar
dmama”
“
I’
m her
e..
..
what
’st
hat
..
.i
t’
syour
ant
idepr
essant
sMuui
j
izadi
dyou…”I
canf
eel
herv
oicebr
eaki
ngt
hrough
ev
erysy
ll
abl
e
“
NobutIwant
edt
omommy
”Ibur
sti
nto
t
ear
s
“
OhMuui
j
iza”Shesay
swi
thacr
ying
v
oiceasshecr
adl
esmei
nherar
ms.
“
I’
m sor
ryt
ohur
tyoul
i
ket
his.Idon’
t
meant
ocausey
ouguy
ssomuchpai
n.
I
’
m sur
ehav
ingt
odeal
wit
hmei
s
dr
aini
ngf
ory
’al
l
.Wat
chi
ngmedr
owni
ng
i
ntodepr
essi
onev
erysi
ngl
edayand
l
i
vingi
nfeart
haty
oumi
ghtl
osemet
o
sui
cide.I
’
m sur
eit
’sr
eal
l
yemot
ional
l
y
dr
aini
ngf
ory
ou.I
t’
snev
ermyi
ntent
ion
t
oputy
’al
lthr
ought
hismi
ser
ymama.
Youhav
enot
hingbutgr
eatt
omey
ou
don’
tdeser
vet
osuf
fferl
i
ket
hisbecause
ofmei
t’
ssounf
airMama”
“
Nowhatar
eyousay
ingMuui
j
iza?
Pl
easedon’
ttel
lmey
ouwantt
ogi
veup
now.Wewi
l
lconquert
hisbaby
,justdi
g
deepwi
thi
nyour
sel
fandy
ouwi
l
lfi
nd
cour
aget
ofi
ght
.Ify
oudon’
twantt
odo
i
tfory
our
sel
fdoi
tfory
ourmom.Iknow
shewoul
dn’
twantt
oseey
oul
i
ket
his
baby
.She’
snotr
est
ingi
npeacewhen
y
ouar
eli
ket
his.Fi
ghtbabypl
ease”
“
I’
mtr
yingmom,
I’
mreal
l
ytr
yingbut
somet
hingi
spul
l
ingmebackt
othi
s
dar
khol
eandIf
eel
li
kei
t’
swher
eI
deser
vet
obe.Somet
imesIf
eel
li
keno
oneunder
standmay
bei
twoul
dhav
e
beenbet
teri
fthi
sheav
inesswei
ghi
ng
downonmecoul
dbeaphy
sical
thi
ng,
l
i
keabaggagey
oucar
ryi
nst
eadof
emot
ional
kindmay
bepeopl
ewoul
d
under
standwhyi
t’
shar
dtogetoutof
bed.Iknowwi
thoutphy
sical
evi
dence
i
t’
shar
dtounder
standbutaccept
ance
canber
eal
l
yhel
pful
.Toknowt
hathow
y
ouf
eel
i
ngi
saccept
edbysomebody
ev
ent
heydon’
tunder
standi
t.I
ttakes
awayt
hatpr
essur
etopr
etendt
obehow
It
hinkpeopl
ewantmet
obesot
hatI
canf
ocusmyener
gyi
ntoheal
i
ngatmy
ownpace”
“
I’
m sor
ryi
fyouf
eel
li
kewear
eput
ti
ng
somuchpr
essur
eony
ousweet
hear
t
may
bey
out
hinkwedon’
tunder
stand
butwedosweet
hear
t.Thi
sist
aki
nga
huget
oll
onal
lofusbaby
.If
eel
hel
pless
y
ouknowIf
eel
li
keI
m notdoi
nggood
enough.If
eel
li
keI
’
mlacki
ng
somewher
easapar
enty
ou.Iso
desper
atel
ywanty
ououtoft
hatdar
k
pl
acebabyIwi
shIcoul
dpul
loutt
her
e
my
sel
f.Lor
dgav
emeachancet
obea
mot
hert
oyouMuui
j
izaandt
her
e’s
not
hingt
hatIwantt
hent
oseey
our
sel
f
happy
.Youhav
eal
ott
oli
vef
orbaby
andIknowy
ouar
est
rongbaby
.
Remembery
ourmom di
dn’
tnamey
ou
Mi
racl
efornot
hing,
yousur
viv
edbaby
whent
hedoct
orsal
readydecl
aredy
ou
dead.Youar
eindeedaMi
racl
ebabyand
Iknowy
ouwi
l
lconquert
his.
”Herwor
ds
ar
emaki
ngmeemot
ional
all
overagai
n.
Wecr
ytoget
herunt
ilwecal
m down.
“
I’
m sor
ryf
orev
ery
thi
ngI
’
m put
ti
ngy
ou
t
hroughandIwanty
out
oknowt
hatI
’
m
sogr
atef
ulf
orev
ery
thi
ngy
ouandbaba
hav
edonef
orme.Youal
sogav
emea
secondchancet
ohav
eamot
her.You
hav
edoneenoughmama.I
’
m not
pr
omi
singy
ouany
thi
ngbutI
’
m goi
ngt
o
t
ryandf
ighthar
der
.I’
m goi
ngt
otakemy
ant
idepr
essant
sev
ent
hought
hei
rssi
de
ef
fect
sar
ewor
set
hendepr
essi
oni
tsel
f.
I
’
m goi
ngt
ocommi
tmy
sel
fint
other
apy
sessi
ons.
”
“
Ohbabyt
hanky
ousomuchwear
e
her
efordon’
tev
erf
orgett
hat
.Il
ovey
ou
Muui
j
iza”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomommy
”If
eel
herl
i
pson
myf
orehead
“
Dinneri
sready
”
“
I’
m nothungr
y”
“
Youneedt
oeatbaby
”loseofappet
it
e
i
soneoft
hesi
deef
fect
sandIhav
elost
somuchwei
ght
.
“
Butmom…”
“
IchasedGabbyout
,ift
hatwhaty
ouar
e
wor
ri
edabout
”
“
‘Youshoul
dn'
thav
emama,
thel
ast
t
hingIwanti
stocausear
if
tbet
ween
t
het
woofy
ou”
“
You’
renotcausi
nganyr
if
titwasabout
t
ime.Gabbyhav
ebeenapai
niny
our
assf
orsol
ongnowandt
hist
imeshe
wasov
erboar
d.Ihadt
osett
her
ecor
d
st
rai
ght
”
“
Youchosemeov
ery
oursi
ster
?”
“
Youar
emydaught
er,
I’
dchoosey
ou
anydayMuui
j
iza”wowt
hiswomanI
don’
tknowhowdoest
hismakesme
f
eel
becauset
hel
astt
hingIwanti
sto
causear
if
tbet
weent
wosi
ster
s.Idon’
t
under
standwhyAunt
yGabbydi
sli
keme
t
hismuchImeany
oucan’
tdi
sli
kea
st
ranger
.Herv
il
ebehav
iort
owar
dsme
f
eel
stooper
sonal
butI
’
mfai
l
ingt
o
cr
ackmybr
ainaboutwhati
tcoul
dbe
t
her
easonbehi
ndt
his.Shewakesup
Kamar
iaandwal
kdownst
air
swi
thme
Rockygui
dingme.Il
oveRockbutImi
ss
mymuf
fi
n.Iappar
ent
lyl
ostheront
he
acci
dentsceneandt
her
ent
sgotmea
dog.ImustsayRockyi
smaki
ngi
teasy
f
ormemor
ethenmuf
fi
ndi
dbutmyl
ove
f
ormuf
fi
nwi
l
lremai
nst
il
l.ThebondI
hadwi
tht
hatcanei
sbey
ond
compr
ehensi
on.Iwon’
tli
eatf
ir
stI
twas
f
rust
rat
ingt
oadaptf
rom acanet
oa
dogbutRockyi
smaki
ngi
teasyf
orme
t
ofal
li
nlov
ewi
thhi
m eachpassi
ngday
.
Mov
ingar
oundwi
thhi
shel
pit
sver
y
easybecausehe’
snowf
ami
l
iarwi
thmy
mov
ement
sandwecr
eat
edabond
whenwi
thi
nfewweeksaf
terhehas
beent
rai
nedf
orf
ewmont
hs.Notonl
y
wasi
tal
i
fechangi
ngex
per
iencet
ohav
e
agui
dedogbuti
tal
socost
edanar
m
andl
eg.I
’
m notsur
ewi
tht
heex
act
amountbutt
heypai
dmor
ethen80k.We
si
tdownandeatsupperov
erwar
m
chat
ter
.It
’sal
way
sni
cet
osi
tar
oundt
he
t
abl
eandchatov
erdi
nnerwhenAunt
y
Gabbyi
snother
e.She’
stheonewho
al
way
scausedr
amaher
e.

Ther
estoft
heweekgobyswi
ft
lyand
bef
oreIknowi
t’
sFr
idayandwel
eav
ing
f
orCapeTown.St
arandmet
hat
’si
t.
Dad’
sPIsai
dKhumal
ogav
eupl
ooki
ng
f
ormemont
hsbackandhe’
sdr
owni
ng
hi
msel
final
cohol
.Mymom’
sdeat
his
haunt
inghi
m.I
’
m gl
adt
hatInol
onger
hav
etol
i
vemyl
i
fei
nfearev
ent
hough
I
’
m abi
tskept
ical
aboutal
lthesudden
changeofev
ent
s.‘
Stopov
ert
hinki
ng
Mi
ra’
Sigh.It
hinkIneedt
hisCapeTown
t
ri
pitwi
l
ldomegoodaf
terbei
ng
coopedupi
nthehousef
ory
ear
s.I
’
m
sl
owl
ybutsur
elyt
ryi
ngt
ogetmyl
i
fe
t
oget
her
.Justl
i
keIpr
omi
semamaI
m
commt
ti
ngmy
sel
fint
her
apysessi
ons
andIknowi
twon’
thappenov
erni
ghtbut
I
’
m goi
ngt
ogi
vei
tmybest
.

“
MommyIwantt
ogowi
thMuui
j
izaand
St
ar”cr
iesKamar
ia
“
Butbabywet
alkedaboutt
his”
“
Whyar
eyoul
eav
ingmebehi
nd
Muui
j
iza”
“
Wher
eI'
m goi
ng,
kidsar
enotal
l
owed
pumpki
n”
“
Youar
ely
ingMuui
j
izay
ouj
ustdon’
t
l
ovemenomor
e”Myhear
tsi
nks,
Iwi
sh
wecangowi
thherbutt
hatwi
l
l
compl
i
cat
ethi
ngs.
“
That
’snott
ruepumpki
nyouknowIl
ove
y
ousomuchandy
ouwi
l
lal
way
sbemy
pumpki
n”
“
I’
m noty
ourpumpki
nany
mor
e”Ihear
l
i
ttl
efoot
stepsr
unni
ngaway
.Tr
ust
pumpki
ntomakey
ouf
eel
badwi
thher
t
ant
rums
“
Don’
twor
ryshewi
l
lcomear
ound”mom
say
s
“
Let
’sgogi
rl
s”Dadsay
s
“
Ilov
eyoumybabi
es.St
art
akecar
eof
mydaught
erpl
easeandi
fev
ert
her
e’s
somet
hingy
ouguy
scal
lusokay
”
“
Wel
ovey
out
oo”Weshar
ehugsand
ki
ssest
hendaddr
ivesust
otheai
rpor
t
wher
ebywemeetourf
ourbody
guar
ds
j
ustf
orsecur
it
y.
“
Guy
smygi
rl
ssaf
etyi
siny
ourhands”
“
Dontwor
ryMrMwangi
yourgi
rl
swi
l
lbe
saf
e”
“
Ilov
eyougi
rl
stakecar
e”
“
Thankswel
ovey
out
oo”Hegi
vesus
hugsandki
ssesandl
eav
eaf
terour
f
li
ghtboar
dingt
imehasbeen
announced.I
’
m aner
vousIdon’
twantt
o
l
i
eI’
m sur
eSt
arcannot
icet
hatbecause
shet
akesmyhandi
ntoher
sand
squeez
esi
tast
hef
li
ghtboar
ds.When
wear
ri
vet
her
ecari
sal
readywai
ti
ngf
or
uswhi
chwi
l
lbet
aki
ngust
othehot
el.
Yesweoptf
orahot
elr
oom wecan’
tgo
t
oSt
arsmom’
shouse.Uponar
ri
val
Star
andIar
edogt
ir
edwer
eti
ret
osl
eep.I
’
m
wokenupbyki
ssesal
lov
ermyf
ace.
“
Hey
”Isaygr
oggi
l
y
“
Heyboobearwakeup”
“
Whatt
imei
sitnow?
”
“
9pm”Isi
tonmybut
t
“
Ijustcal
l
edr
oom ser
vicebutbef
oreour
f
oodar
ri
veswehav
etov
ideocal
lAunt
y
”
“
Ohsnapweshoul
dhav
edonet
hatt
he
momentwear
ri
ve,
I’
m sur
eshe’
s
f
reaki
ngout
”
“
Youknowher
,letmet
akemyphone”I
don’
thav
eaphoner
easonbei
ngIdi
dn’
t
wantt
obet
racedbutnowsi
nce
Khumal
oisnol
ongerl
ooki
ngf
orme
may
bei
t’
sti
meIaskdadt
obuymeone.
I
’
m sur
eev
ery
onei
swor
ri
edaboutme
butnowsi
nceI
’
m goi
ngt
ohav
eaphone
It
hinki
t’
sti
meIcont
actt
hem andl
et
t
hem knowt
hatI
’
m okay
.Thel
astt
hingI
want
edwast
ori
skmyl
i
feaswel
las
t
hei
rshenceInev
ercont
act
edt
hem
ev
en.
Iknewt
hati
fIcal
lthem Khumal
o
woul
dfi
ndoutandt
hatwoul
dhav
enot
putmyl
i
fei
ntor
iskonl
ybutaswel
las
t
hei
rs.Wev
ideocal
lmom andshe’
s
happyt
oheart
hatwear
ri
vesaf
elyand
weal
sot
alkt
oKamar
iaI
’
m gl
adshe’
s
nol
ongermadatus.Af
tert
alki
ngt
odad
wesayourgoodby
e.Ourf
oodar
ri
ves
andweeatwhi
l
ewat
chi
ngNet
fl
ixsi
nce
i
shasaudi
odescr
ipt
ion.Honest
lyIcan’
t
r
ememberwhenwast
hel
astIwat
ched
t
vIt
hinkt
hef
actt
hatt
heydon’
thav
e
DSTVcont
ri
but
edbecauseI
tspl
ayi
ngal
l
ov
erAf
ri
cabutIpr
eferNet
fl
ixbecause
i
t’
spl
ayi
ngal
mostev
erycount
ryev
en
t
hought
hepackagesdi
ff
erswi
thi
na
count
ry.Thenex
tmor
ningaf
terour
hy
gienepr
ocesswel
eav
eforbr
eakf
ast
wi
thourbody
guar
ds.Theconcer
tis
act
ual
l
ytoni
ghtsoSt
arandIdeci
det
o
ex
plor
eCapeTownt
hewhol
edayand
I
’
m enj
oyi
ngev
erysi
ngl
emoment
.
“
Thanky
ouBooBear
”
“
Forwhat
?“
“
Foragr
eei
ngt
ocomewi
thme.i
t’
s
meansal
ott
ome”
“
It
’snobi
ggi
e”shecupsmyf
aceand
ki
ssesme.
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Star
”
“
shhhdon’
tsayi
tback”Isi
gh.what
’s
goi
ngonbet
weenmeandSt
armakes
mequest
ionmysex
ual
i
ty.I
t’
s5pm and
wear
edonebeaut
if
yingour
sel
vesand
smel
l
inggood.Theconcer
tst
art
sat
6pm.
“
Youl
ookst
unni
ngbabe”St
arsay
s
“
Thanky
oubabe.Icani
magi
nehow
gor
geousy
oul
ookt
oo”weact
ual
l
y
boughtsameout
fi
tbuther
sit
’s
t
omboy
ishofcour
se.
“
Thanky
ou”Shesay
swi
thanunst
eady
v
oice
“
Whyar
eyoushaki
ngar
eyouscar
ed?
”
“
Whati
fI'
m af
lop”
“
ComeonSt
ary
ouwon’
t,
youar
egr
eat
i
nthi
syou'
l
lnai
li
t,t
rustme”
“
Yout
ninkso?
”
“
Iknowso”Shepul
l
smei
nherar
ms
andIsi
nki
ntot
hehugt
henwel
eav
e.I
cant
ell
thati
t’
spackedbyt
hev
ibeand
noi
se.Theni
ghtgoeswel
lwi
thdj
s
pl
ayi
ngoneaf
tert
heot
her
.Imustsay
mySt
arwasbor
nfort
hisandIcanhear
t
hecr
owdt
hatt
heyl
oveher
.
-

Idon’
tunder
standwomensomet
imes
t
hemomenty
out
hinky
ouunder
stand
t
hem t
heychangel
i
keal
cohol
int
he
st
omach.BongaandIhadagr
eatni
ght
t
oget
herandi
tfel
tgoodt
odi
neand
wi
newi
thher
.Iknewt
hatI
fIaskedher
outshewoul
dref
usedbecauset
hat
's
howIt
houghtBongai
sbutwhenshe
sai
d“Your
obbedmeachancet
o
pr
epar
emy
sel
f”Icoul
dn’
thel
pbutsmi
l
e.
i
t’
sbeenast
ressf
ul4y
ear
sofmyl
i
fe
act
ual
l
y,hav
ingt
owat
cht
hewomeny
ou
t
houghty
ouwi
l
lpr
otectdr
owni
ng
her
sel
final
cohol
,hav
ingt
owat
chy
our
nephewov
erdosi
ngdr
ugsbecauseof
y
ourmi
ssi
onf
ail
ed.Ihav
etr
ied
ev
ery
thi
ngt
ofi
ndMi
rabutI
’
m notgi
vi
ng
up.Iwi
l
lfi
ndherev
eni
fherbody
,of
cour
seIdon’
ttel
lBongat
hatbutImust
behonestasmuchasI
’
m notgoi
ngt
o
gi
veupI
’
m al
sopr
epar
ingmy
sel
ffort
he
wor
st.Ihopei
t’
sdoesn’
tcomet
othat
t
houghBongawon’
tsur
viv
ethat
.Ihav
e
beent
ryi
ngt
ost
opherf
rom dr
inki
ngbut
i
t’
swasami
ssi
oni
mpossi
bleIf
igur
ed
outt
hathav
ingamot
hermi
ghthel
p.
Ev
ery
oneoneneedst
hei
rmot
herno
mat
terhowol
dorr
icht
heyar
e.Ihope
t
heydof
ixt
hingsbet
weent
hem t
her
e’s
t
oomuchunr
esol
vedi
ssues.
I
’
m sur
pri
sedt
hatmyhousei
snot
l
ockedbutwhenIl
efthomeIl
ockedi
t.
Shi
tmyguni
sinsi
det
hest
udyr
oom.I
’
m
wel
comedbyr
osesont
hef
loorandI
f
oll
owt
hem t
othebedr
oom.Ther
ear
e
r
osesont
hebedaswel
landshe’
sly
ing
oni
twear
ingherbl
ackl
i
nger
ie
“
Heyhandsome”Iswal
l
owspi
t
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”
“
Hawui
sthaty
ourwayofgr
eet
ingy
our
baby
”mybabyi
sshehi
gh?Shecr
awl
s
downf
rom t
hebedandst
ri
dest
owar
ds
me
“
Wher
edi
dyougett
hekey
s?”
“
Yougav
eme”sher
unshernai
l
sonmy
l
i
ps
“
Youar
ely
ing”
“
Stopaski
ngt
oomuchandl
etmet
ake
car
eofy
ou”Sheki
ssesmeandIpush
her
“
Khocywher
edi
dyougetmykey
sand
whatdoy
ouwant
?”
“
Imademyown”
“
Whogav
eyout
her
ightt
odot
hat
!”
“
Ijustwant
edt
osupr
isey
ouZani
”
“
Heyheysur
pri
sememyf
ootgi
vemy
key
sandgethel
lout
!”
“
Ohdaddyi
sgr
umpybutdon’
twor
ryI
hav
eaf
ix”sheni
bbl
esmyear
lobesI
st
if
leamoan.Ihat
ehowsheknowshow
t
owor
kmebutI
’
m notgoi
ngt
ogi
vei
n.
“
Giv
ememydamnkey
sandl
eav
e,bar
e
i
nmi
ndt
hatwhat
everwehadi
sov
er.
Youcan’
tinv
ademypr
ivacyl
i
ket
his!
!”
sheswal
l
owshar
d
“
Whoi
sshe?
”
“
Huh?
”
“
Whoi
sthatwhor
eyouar
echeat
ing
wi
th”
“
Cheat
inghai
bosi
s”
“
Whot
hef
ucki
sherKhuz
ani
!”
“
Heywenay
ouhav
enor
ightt
oaskme
shi
t,ar
ewei
nar
elat
ionshi
pper
haps”
“
Ohi
sthi
swhaty
ousaynowt
haty
ou
gotanewpussy
”thi
xongi
yal
i
ngwa!
“
Whyar
eyoubehav
ingl
i
ket
hisKhocy
,
y
ouknewf
rom t
hewor
dgot
haty
ouand
Iar
ejustf
ucki
ngwhati
sal
lthi
snow!
”
“
Ilov
eyouKhuz
ani
”Ichuckl
eindi
sbel
i
ef
“
Lov
e,y
ouar
espeaki
ngChi
nese
woman”
“
IknowokaybutIdi
dn’
tpl
ant
ofal
li
n
l
ovewi
thy
ou.Ngi
yakut
handa”
“
I’
m sor
ryKhocybuty
ouneedt
oleav
e”
shebur
sti
ntot
ear
slor
d!Icomf
orther
unt
ilshe’
scal
m
“
LookI
’
m sor
ryt
haty
oucaughtf
eel
i
ngs
andIcan’
tgi
vey
oumor
ethenwhatI
hav
ebeengi
vi
ngy
ou”sheget
supand
get
sdr
essedt
hatheadoutl
eav
ingme
st
unned.

Thenex
tmor
ningIt
ryt
ocal
lBongabut
she’
snotanswer
ingmycal
l
s,she’
smad
atmebutIdon’
tgetwhyshe’
stheone
whosai
dImustgoandhav
efunnow
shedoesn’
twantmet
ogo.Mycousi
nis
get
ti
ngmar
ri
edt
hisSundayhenceI
’
m
goi
ngt
oCapeTownbutIal
sot
hinkt
his
t
ri
pwi
l
lhel
pmet
oeaset
hest
ressabi
t.
I
t’
sbeent
oomuchIj
ustwantt
ofor
gota
bi
tandhav
efun.Ideci
det
odr
iveand
r
esti
nbet
ween.Iar
ri
veaf
tert
woday
s
andst
artbychecki
ngi
nahot
elf
ir
st
bef
oredr
ivi
ngt
her
e.
“
Baf
o!”Say
sThamsanqa
“
Man!
”Wehug
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evey
ouar
eget
ti
ngmar
ri
ed
bef
oreme!
”
“
Moswenay
ouar
est
ucknaboBr
enda
bamasi
mba”Il
augh
“
I’
m ov
ert
hatone”
“
Youar
enotget
ti
ngy
ounger
”
“
Letmegogr
eetel
der
s”Imakemyway
i
nsi
deandgr
eett
heel
der
s,t
heyar
eso
happyt
oseemeandt
heyaskmeabout
mom andev
ery
thi
ng.OnceI
’
m doneI
f
indmycousi
nschi
l
li
ngout
sidehav
ing
dr
inksandIj
oint
hem.I
t’
sbeenawhi
l
e
andi
t’
sfeel
sreal
l
ygoodt
obewi
thmy
mom’
sfami
l
y.
“
Sowhenar
eyouget
ti
ngmar
ri
edZani
?”
Theyar
eal
lmar
ri
edandIknowt
hey
won’
tst
opt
hisnonsense.
“
Whosai
dIwantt
ogetmar
ri
ed?
”They
al
ll
augh
“
Slov
atol
dmey
ouneedsci
ssor
”say
s
Thul
ani
“
Yeahwhywoul
dyouwantt
hatr
uthl
ess
man”askMf
anaf
uthi
“
I’
mrel
uct
antact
ual
l
yIwanthi
mtohel
p
mef
indami
ssi
nggi
rlt
hatI
’
mver
yfond
of
”
“
Youmeant
hemot
hery
ouv
eryf
ond
of
?”Sl
ovasay
s
“
Idi
otshutup”Hel
aughs
“
Sci
ssori
snott
hemany
ouwannaowe
man”
“
IknowheyhenceI
’
mreconsi
der
ingt
his
buthe’
stheonl
ymanwhocanhel
pme
f
indMi
ra.Idon’
tknowwhatt
odo”Igul
p
downmywhi
skey
“
Sowenay
ouwantt
ofi
ndt
hisgi
rl
becausey
ouar
eint
othemot
her
?”
Kai
zerasks
“
Noi
tsmyf
aul
tthegi
rli
smi
ssi
ng”I
ex
plai
nthesi
tuat
ion
“
Yho4y
ear
sSpi
j
oms,
wor
seshe’
sbl
i
nd.
It
hinkshe’
sdead”Kai
zersay
s
“
ThenIneedt
ofi
ndherbones,
hermom
needscl
osur
eatl
eastKai
zer
”
“
Eishneh”Inodandpourmy
sel
f
whi
skey
.Thet
opi
cshi
ft
stosoccerand
t
othenex
ttopi
cunt
ilwer
unoutof
al
cohol
anddeci
det
ohi
tacl
ub.Dr
inks
ar
efl
owi
ngi
sthev
ibei
scool
def
ini
tel
y
whatIneed.Somel
adi
esj
oinsusand
wechi
l
ltoget
herbef
oreIknowi
tI’
m
dr
ivi
ngt
othegar
agewi
tht
wol
adi
es.I
buyt
hecondomsanddr
ivet
omyhot
el
r
oom andhav
eahel
l
uvani
ghtwi
tht
he
t
wol
adi
es.

Thef
oll
owi
ngdayi
t’
sSat
urdaywhi
ch
meansi
tsabusydaysoIspendi
tal
li
n
mycousi
nshouser
unni
nganyer
rands
t
hatneedst
obe.Thamsanqadi
dn’
t
wantabachel
orpar
tybutt
hegent
s
deci
det
hatwemustgot
othi
sconcer
t
atl
east
.Wi
tht
hatsai
dwel
eav
eand
whenwegett
her
ewebuyt
icket
satt
he
gat
eandmakeourent
rance.I
t’
spacked
butwechoset
heVI
Psect
iont
ogett
he
cl
earv
iewwi
thoutdi
stur
bance.Af
terdj
cof
feedj
Starf
oll
ows,
sheal
soknows
herst
uffandIhav
enev
erseenher
bef
oremay
beshe’
snew.Wehav
efun
unt
ilt
heconcer
tisf
ini
sh.Iseet
hisSt
ar
Dj
wal
ki
ngwi
thhergi
rl
fr
iendIassume
andherar
misar
oundherwai
st.She
keepski
ssi
ngherandshe’
sgi
ggl
i
ng.I
can’
thel
pbutf
eel
li
ket
hatgi
ggl
i
ngi
s
f
ami
l
iar
.
“
Starst
opi
t!
”shesay
sgi
ggl
i
ng.It
hink
myear
sar
etr
icki
ngme
“
Ilov
eyout
oomySt
ar”Ican’
tseeher
f
aceI
t’
snotcl
earwher
eIam butt
hat
v
oice
“
Mir
a!”Ascr
eam i
nvol
unt
ari
l
ysl
i
pped
outofmout
handIcanseet
hatshe
di
dn’
thearany
thi
ngsoIt
ryt
omakemy
wayt
othenbutt
het
imeIgett
her
ethey
ar
edr
ivi
ngout
.Ir
unt
omycarand
f
oll
owt
hem.It
hinkt
heynot
icet
hatI
’
m
f
oll
owi
ngt
hem becauset
henex
tthi
ngI
heari
sgunshot
sfi
redst
rai
ghtt
omycar
.
If
eel
shar
ppai
nal
lov
ermybodybutI
keepdr
ivi
ngi
nmyheadscr
eami
ng
“
Mir
a!”Thel
oudscr
eechi
ngnoi
sef
il
ls
myear
sandev
ery
thi
ngbecomesbl
urr
y
andunt
ili
tgoesdar
k.
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayBusi
siwe
Modi
se

CHAPTER36(
unedi
ted)

Ican’
trememberwhenwast
hel
astI
hadf
unl
i
ket
oday
.It
’sf
eel
sogr
eatt
o
l
i
veandhav
efunl
i
keanyot
her23y
ear
ol
d.Theconcer
twasabl
astwear
enow
maki
ngourwayt
otheex
it.St
arcan’
t
keepherl
i
psandherhandst
oher
.
“
Starst
opi
t!
”Igi
ggl
eassheni
bbl
eson
myear
lobe
“
Ihadt
hebestni
ghtofmyl
i
feandI
’
m
gl
adIshar
edi
twi
tht
heoneIl
ove.
Ni
nakupenda”(
Ilov
eyou)
“
Ilov
eyout
oomySt
ar”
“
Real
l
y”Wetski
pinsi
det
hecar
.St
arand
Iar
eatt
hebackseat
.Thebody
guar
ds
ar
eatt
hef
ront
,oneoft
hem i
sdr
ivi
ng
t
heot
hert
wobody
guar
dsar
efol
l
owi
ng
behi
ndus.
“
Whatdoy
oumeanr
eal
l
yyouknowI
l
ovey
ouSt
ar”Il
oveSt
art
hat
’st
ruebut
I
’
m notsur
eifIl
ovehert
hewayshe
wantmet
olov
eher
.
“
Ofcour
se”shesoundssodi
sappoi
nted
“
Dontdot
hatpl
easey
ouar
ehur
ti
ngme”
“
I’
m sor
ryI
’
m bei
ngsel
fi
sh”
“
May
beweshoul
dst
opwhat
evert
hati
s
happeni
ngbet
weenusbecausei
tfeel
s
l
i
keI
’
m gi
vi
ngy
ouhopest
haty
ouandI
coul
dbemor
e.”
“
Nonodon’
tsayt
hatpl
ease”shecups
myf
aceandki
ssesme,
ourt
ounges
meeti
nadance.Ican’
thel
pamoant
hat
escapesmyl
i
psasshef
ondl
esmy
boobs.Oneoft
hebody
guar
dsphone
r
ings,
Isayoneoft
hebody
guar
dsphone
becauseSt
ar’
sphonedoesn’
tri
ngl
i
ke
t
hat
.
“
Sur
e..
.shi
t!
”
“
What
’sgoi
ngon”St
arasks
“
Ther
e’st
hismant
hatwasl
ooki
ngat
Muuj
i
zasuspi
ciousl
yatt
heconcer
tI
t
hinkhe’
sfol
l
owi
ngus”myhear
tski
psa
beat
“
Whatdoy
oumeany
out
hink?
”St
ar
asksf
uri
ousl
y
“
He’
sfol
l
owi
ngus!
”
“
Ohnoi
t’
sKhumal
o,hesawmeSt
ar,
he
wantt
oki
l
lme”I
’
mint
ear
sal
ready
.To
t
ell
youI
’
mter
ri
fi
edi
t’
swoul
dbean
under
stat
ement
.
“
Cal
m downBooBearpl
ease”shehol
ds
mei
nherar
msi
nthatsecondwehear
gunshot
s.Iscr
eam andhol
dSt
art
ight
i
nmyar
ms.Thegunshot
skeepsgoi
ng
onf
orawhi
l
eunt
ilt
heycomet
oahal
t
“
Don’
twor
rygi
rl
swear
eal
lcl
ear
”I’
m
t
rembl
i
ngwi
thf
earandacr
yingmess.I
f
eel
li
kemybr
eat
hisgoi
ngt
oshutdown
anymomentf
rom now.
“
Muuj
i
zabr
eat
hpl
ease”I
m hav
inga
pani
cat
tackandIcanhearSt
ar’
svoi
ce
pani
cki
ng
“
Dammi
tmaanMuuj
i
zabr
eat
he!
Br
eat
he!
”
“
Pul
lov
erbr
osheneedsomeai
r!
”Idon’
t
knowwhat
’shappensaf
tert
hatbutIcan
f
eel
col
dbr
eez
ehi
tt
ingmyski
npai
nful
l
y
“
Muui
j
izapl
easedon’
tdot
hist
ome.
Br
eat
he”St
arsay
swi
thacr
yingv
oice.I
t
ryt
obr
eat
heunt
ilIr
egai
nmybr
eat
hing.
“
OhBooBeardon’
tev
erdot
hatagai
n”
shepl
ant
ski
ssesal
lov
ermyf
aceIcan
f
eel
war
mli
qui
dfal
l
ingonmyf
ace.
She’
scr
yingandIhav
enev
erwi
tnessed
St
arcr
ying.Theyt
akemei
nthecarand
wedr
iveof
ftot
hehot
el.Uponar
ri
val
the
body
guar
dsar
emaki
ngcal
l
swhi
l
eI’
m
pr
essedagai
nstSt
ar’
schest
“
Iwantt
ogohomenowSt
ar”
“
Wewi
l
lgot
omor
rowmor
ningBoo
Bear
”
“
NononoIwi
l
lbedeadbyt
hen!
”
“
Youneedt
ocal
m downMuuj
i
zawe
can’
thav
eanot
herpani
cat
tack.Iwi
l
lgo
gety
ousomewat
er”
“
Don’
tleav
emepl
ease”Icl
enchonher
andshehol
dsmet
ight
ly
“
Youar
esaf
ebabydon’
twor
ry”Idon’
t
knowhowdi
dIf
all
asl
eepbutt
henex
t
mor
ningI
’
m wokenupbySt
ar
“
Ihav
erunabat
hforuscome”
“
It
’st
henex
tmor
ningr
ight
”
“
Yeswear
egoi
nghome.
..
come”She
hel
psmeoutoft
hebedandwemake
ourwayt
othebat
hroom.Myt
ri
pwas
spoi
l
edIguessIwi
l
lnev
erbef
reef
rom
t
hisman.Whycan’
thef
orgotaboutme
andl
etmel
i
vemyl
i
fe.Hehasdone
enoughbyki
l
li
ngmymot
hert
hel
easthe
coul
ddoi
stospar
ememyl
i
femaan!
Af
terourhy
gienepr
ocessweeat
br
eakf
astIdownmypi
l
lsf
ir
stbef
ore
l
eav
ing.Isi
ghwi
thr
eli
eft
hemomentt
he
f
li
ghtboar
ds.Idon’
tthi
nkI
’
m ev
ergoi
ng
t
ocomebackt
oSA.
“
Wear
esaf
eokay
”Inodandl
aymy
headonhershoul
der
.
“
Baby
!”Themomentwear
ri
veatt
he
ai
rpor
tmom hugsmei
nherar
ms
“
I’
m soscar
edmom”Icr
y
“
Youar
esaf
enowsweet
hear
t”she
comf
ort
sme.Dadal
sohugsmet
henwe
dr
ivehome,
Kamar
iai
spr
essedagai
nst
mychest
.
“
Whatdi
dyoubr
oughtf
ormei
nCape
TownMuuj
i
za”
“
Not
hingpumpki
nal
lthest
oreswer
e
cl
osedbutIwi
l
lmakei
ttoupy
ouokay
”
“
Okay
.”
Uponar
ri
val
wechi
l
lint
hel
i
vingr
oom
andSt
art
ell
sther
ent
saboutourt
ri
p.
“
ThePIsai
dKhumal
ogav
eupl
ooki
ng
f
ormehowi
t’
spossi
blenowt
hathe
wasf
oll
owi
ngus?
”
“
Thebody
guar
dst
oldmewhatwent
downsweet
hear
tandIaskedt
hePIhe
sai
dKhumal
ohaspeopl
ewor
kingf
or
hi
m andsomehowt
hosepeopl
e
happenedt
obet
her
eatt
heconcer
t.
Gi
vi
ngupl
ooki
ngf
ory
oudoesn’
tmean
henol
ongerwanty
ou.I
fhi
speopl
esee
y
ouobv
iousl
ytheywi
l
ltr
acky
oudown.I
shoul
dn’
thav
eal
l
owedy
out
ogot
o
CapeTown”
“
Sot
hismeanmyl
i
fei
sst
il
li
ndanger
?”
“
I’
m af
rai
dso”
“
Hai
sukal
etski
l
lthi
sKhumal
oonceand
f
oral
luncl
e”say
sSt
ar
“
Hay
iSt
ar!
”Mom di
sappr
oves
“
NoAunt
yMuuj
i
zacan’
tli
vel
i
ket
his!
Shecan’
tbef
reenowbecauseoft
his
manasi
fit
’snotenought
hatheki
l
led
hermot
her
.I’
m get
ti
ngsi
ckofhi
m!”
“
Thi
smani
sdanger
ousSt
arhehas
peopl
ewor
kingf
orhi
m.Doy
out
hinki
f
weki
l
lhi
m andt
heywi
l
lletusl
i
ve.
Ki
l
li
ngt
hei
rbosst
hat
’smeannowor
k
f
ort
hem andt
hei
rfami
l
ieswoul
d
st
arv
e!”Dadsay
s
“
SowhatdowedoMwangi
it’
sonl
ya
mat
teroft
imet
heyf
indher
.”Mom say
s
“
Starshoul
dn’
thav
elef
twi
thMuuj
i
za!
”
“
Awcomeonuncl
ehowwasIsupposed
t
oknowt
hatt
heywi
l
lseeus.Muuj
i
za
needt
oli
veuncl
eli
keany23y
earol
d.
Shecan’
tst
ayhi
dingl
i
ket
his.Di
dyou
knowt
hatMuuj
i
zai
sasi
nger
?Shewon
ar
ecor
ddeal
butshedi
dn’
tgetachance
t
olethert
alentshi
neduet
owhat
happened.Thi
shi
dingneedst
ost
op
nowandMuuj
i
zahast
oli
veherl
i
fe
wi
thoutf
ear
”St
arknowsev
ery
thi
ng
aboutmebecauseIt
oldher
.
“
May
bei
tst
imeIf
acehi
m andl
ethi
m
ki
l
lme.St
ari
sri
ghtIcan’
tkeepr
unni
ng
awayl
i
ket
his.Youhav
epr
otect
edme
enoughnowIdon’
twanty
’al
ltobeki
l
led
becauseofme.Iknowt
hathewi
l
lal
so
ki
l
lyoual
li
t’
sbet
teri
fIgonowbef
ore
hef
indusandki
l
lal
lofus”
“
Nonobabydon’
tsayt
hatpl
ease
Mwangi
dosomet
hingpl
easeIcan’
t
l
osemydaught
er”mom i
scr
yingnow.
“
Don’
tcr
yhoneyIwi
l
lseewhatIcando
f
ornowIwi
l
lhi
remor
ebody
guar
ds.
”
Thel
astt
hingIwanti
sfort
hesel
ovel
y
peopl
etobeki
l
ledbecauseofme.They
hav
ebeengr
eatt
omet
heycan’
tli
ve
t
hei
rli
vesi
nfearbecauseofme.Iknow
Khumal
owon’
thesi
tat
etoki
l
lthem t
oo.
It
hinki
t’
sti
meIf
acehi
m.The
at
mospher
eissomberIdeci
det
ohav
e
anear
lyni
ght
.Int
hemi
ddl
eofmysl
eep
If
eel
thebedmov
ingandIscr
eam
“
it
’smeBooBeardon’
tbescar
ed”she
get
sont
opofmeandki
ssesme
passi
onat
elywhi
l
etaki
ngof
fmypj
s.
“
GoshImi
ssy
ourf
ucki
nghotpussy
”
sher
aspsagai
ntmyearsendi
ngshi
ver
downmyspi
ne.Shest
art
sst
roki
ngmy
body
,herhandsf
eel
ssodamngoodal
l
ov
ermybody
.Icanf
eel
mysel
frel
axi
ng
andenj
oyi
ngev
ery
thi
ngt
hati
saboutt
o
happen.Shet
rai
l
ski
ssesonneck,
ear
s
andf
aceandwhenshegett
omyboobs
shesucksandl
i
ckshar
dont
hem
“
OhhhSt
ar”Sheni
bbl
esonmyni
ppl
es
sendi
nganunbear
abl
eit
chdownmy
pussy
.If
eel
herhandscuppi
ngmy
pussyandsqueez
esi
t
“
Star
rr”Imoansof
tl
yasshespr
eadmy
l
egswi
deandbl
owai
roni
t
“
Youhav
eapr
ett
ypussybabysocl
ean
andneat
!”Shest
rokesmyi
nnert
highs
gent
lyandIshi
verasgoosebumpspops
al
lov
ermybody
.
“
Youar
esowetandsl
i
pper
ybaby
!”If
eel
herf
ingerpl
ayi
ngov
ermywetf
oldsand
spr
eadt
hem.Iscr
eam asIf
eel
the
sof
tnessandwar
mthofhert
oungeov
er
cl
i
t,shesucksoni
thar
dthatIcanhear
suckl
i
ngsoundsandi
t’
sdr
ivi
ngme
i
nsane.I
t’
sfeel
sodamngoodsher
eal
l
y
hasmeov
ert
heedge.If
eel
hert
ounge
r
unni
ngonmypussy
,fr
om t
hebot
tom
t
otopf
li
cki
ngmycl
i
tatt
het
opoft
he
upst
roke.Damnt
hepl
easur
eI’
mfeel
i
ng
r
ightnowi
sbey
ondwhatIev
er
ex
per
iencedi
nmyl
i
fe.
“
Yout
ast
esodamngoodboobear
”she
say
sagai
nstmypussyt
hev
ibr
ati
onsof
herv
oicesendswonder
ful
needl
es
pr
ickl
i
ngal
lov
ermybody
.Il
ostmy
br
eat
hwhenIf
eel
hert
onguesl
i
ding
i
ntome.Icl
enchont
hecov
ersand
scr
eam gi
bber
isht
hingsashert
ounge
sl
i
psdeeperanddeeperi
ntomycunt
.
Shet
oungef
uckmehar
d,Il
ostal
lmy
sensesandscr
eam i
ndel
i
ghtasIsqui
rt
.
“
Ohf
uckIl
oveI
twheny
ousqui
rt
!”The
f
ir
stt
imeshemademesqui
rtIwasso
embar
rassedt
hinki
ngIwett
hebedbut
shet
oldi
tshappens.sheki
ssesherway
upmaki
ngmet
ast
emyj
uices.Ihel
pher
t
akeouthercl
othesasweki
ss,
she
bucksherhi
pssl
owl
yIgr
abherbut
tand
smacki
tshegr
owl
sandi
ncr
easeher
pace,
thr
ust
inghermoundagai
nstmi
ne.
Ispr
eadmyl
egsabi
twi
depul
l
ingher
bet
weenmyt
highscl
oser
,thef
eel
ofour
cl
i
tsr
ubbi
ngt
oget
heri
gni
teani
nfer
no
t
hatspr
eadal
lov
ermybody
.Thesweet
moansofourpl
easur
efi
l
lsmybedr
oom.
Isl
i
demyhandbet
weent
hecr
ackofher
but
tunt
ilIr
eachherdr
ippi
ngwetcunt
andsl
i
pmyf
ingeri
ntoherf
oll
owedby
t
heot
her
.
“
Damnbaby
!”Shegr
oansl
oudl
y,Iwor
k
onmyf
inger
sinsy
ncwi
thhert
hrust
s
unt
ilwebot
hofourbeaut
if
ulwor
ld
ex
plode.
Twoday
spassmom anddadhav
e
cal
l
edmesoher
eIam si
ti
ngont
he
couch
“
Mom,
Dad?
”
“
Itwasn’
teasyt
oreacht
othi
ssol
uti
on
butwel
ovey
ouMuuj
i
zaandwecan’
tlet
t
hatmanki
l
lyousowehav
edeci
ded
t
hati
t’
sbet
terwemov
etoov
erseas”
-
Inev
ert
houghtIwoul
dbei
nlov
eagai
n
af
terwhatmyexboy
fri
endputme
t
hrough.Hewasmyf
ir
stt
hrough
ev
ery
thi
ngandwhenhedumpedmef
or
myf
ri
end.It
houghti
twast
heendoft
he
wor
ld.Il
ovedt
hatboybutheygood
r
iddancet
obadr
ubbi
shnowIhav
e
f
oundagoodguy
.Lwandl
eOhGodI
l
ovehi
m somuch,
ourr
elat
ionshi
p
st
art
edasf
uckf
ri
endsunt
ilwef
all
in
l
oveandt
hedayhet
oldmet
hathewi
l
l
f
etchmet
omeethi
spar
ent
sIj
ustknew
t
hathe’
sser
iousaboutus.Honest
lyIf
all
i
nlov
ewi
thhi
m bef
orehedi
dwi
thme
andi
twasnoteasyhav
ingt
odeal
wit
h
hi
m whi
ningabouthi
sundy
ingl
ovef
or
Mi
rabutIunder
stood.I
t’
swasn’
teasy
f
ormeaswel
ltogetov
ermyex
boy
fri
end.Ican’
tcompar
ethet
wo
si
tuat
ionsbutt
hepai
nofl
osi
ngt
heone
y
oul
ovei
sthesame.

Hi
spar
ent
sar
elov
elyshamet
hey
wel
comedmeni
cel
yandIcoul
dn’
tbe
happi
erbutt
hepr
obl
em i
shi
sli
tt
le
si
ster
.Wuuut
hatl
i
ttl
ebr
atdoesn’
tli
ke
meatal
l
.She’
sal
way
sonaboutMi
ra
t
hisMi
rat
hatIgetbor
edr
eal
l
yandt
he
dayshesai
dIhav
efatcheeksIwant
ed
t
omoerherl
i
ttl
espoi
l
edass.It
oldmy
mot
heraboutherandsheadv
isedme
t
obeni
cet
ohershe’
sjustachi
l
d.My
mom andIar
ever
ycl
osewel
lI’
m cl
ose
t
obot
hofmypar
ent
sact
ual
l
y.Theyl
i
ve
i
nDumbewi
thmyt
wol
i
ttl
ebr
other
sI’
m
t
heel
dest
.Bot
hofmypar
ent
sar
e
t
eacher
sobv
iousl
ytheywoul
dn’
thav
e
al
l
owedmet
onotf
urt
hermyst
udi
es
ev
eni
twasmeantf
ort
hem t
otake
l
oansf
ort
unat
elyIgotMZbur
sar
y.I
’
m
cur
rent
lydoi
ngl
awatUKZN,
thi
smy
secondy
ear
.I’
mrent
ingaapar
tmentbut
f
ort
woweeksIhav
ebeenst
ayi
ngat
Lwandl
e’
shouse.Hi
spar
ent
sar
ein
CapeTownhi
suncl
ewasshott
wo
weeksbackf
ort
unat
elyhi
scousi
nswer
e
f
oll
owi
nghi
m andt
heyt
ookhi
mtot
he
hospi
tal
.Lwandl
eisgr
umpyanda
gr
umpyLwandl
eisannoy
ing.

I
’
m cooki
ngi
ntheki
tchenandLwandl
e
wentt
oseehi
sfr
iendTshepo.The
spoi
l
edbr
ati
swat
chi
ngcar
toonsi
nthe
l
i
vingr
oom.
“
Yay
aI’
m hungr
y”say
sthel
i
ttl
ebr
atas
shemakesherwayi
n
“
I’
m st
il
lcooki
ng”
“
Makesomet
hingf
ormewhi
l
eyoucook.
Mi
rauset
odot
hat
”Ir
oll
myey
es
“
Whatdoy
ouwantt
oeatke?
”
“
Peanutbut
terandbut
tersandwi
chi
t
wasMi
ra’
sfav
ori
te”Gosh!
“
Comesi
tdownke”shesi
tsont
hehi
gh
chai
randl
ooksatme
“
What
?”
“
Ufunaukux
abananoLwandl
ewena
kusaz
ony
iwa”shegi
ggl
esIl
ookather
conf
used
“
Whatar
eyouonabout
?”
“
Thathoodi
eyouar
ewear
ingIwi
l
l
adv
isey
out
otakei
tof
fshame”
“
Lwandl
ehav
enopr
obl
em wi
thme
wear
inghi
scl
othesandwhyam Iev
en
ex
plai
ningmy
sel
ftoy
ouar
gh!
”
“
Tjeeeasaz
i”shegi
ggl
esIdeci
det
o
i
gnor
eherandmakeshersandwi
chwi
th
j
uice
“
Her
e”
“
Thanky
oubhov
awami
omuhl
e”I
’
m so
t
empt
edt
osl
apherbutIr
emembermy
mom’
swor
ds.
“
Arey
ousur
eyoudon’
twantt
otakeof
f
t
hathoodi
e”
“
Leav
emeal
onel
i
ttl
ebr
at!
!”Weheara
whi
stl
i
ngi
t’
sLwandl
e
“
Ohoohe’
sback”
“
Heybaby
”Isayhesmi
l
esbuthi
ssmi
l
e
di
sappear
sinai
nst
ant
“
Whyar
eyouwear
ingt
hathoodi
e?”
“
Hawuy
ounev
erhadapr
obl
em wi
thme
wear
ingy
ourcl
othes”
“
Nott
hishoodi
etakei
tof
f”
“
Butbaby
…”
“
Isai
dtakei
tof
fAy
anda!
!”Heshout
s
andheadt
othel
i
vingr
oom
“
HahahaIt
oldy
oubuty
oudi
dn’
tli
sten
t
ome,
that
’sMi
ra’
shoodi
e”shebur
st
i
ntol
aught
erIf
eel
tear
sbur
ningmy
ey
es.

Ican’
tseem t
omakeoutwher
eIam I
f
eel
sol
ostandf
arawaybutt
her
e’st
his
sof
tvoi
ceIhearf
rom adi
stance“
Please
comebackt
ousKhuz
ani
weneedy
ou”I
wantt
orepl
ybutf
orsomer
easonwor
ds
ar
ebl
ockedi
nmyt
hroat
.“Comeback
pl
easeI
’
m beggi
ngy
ou.Whatwoul
d
l
i
ttl
eEmybewi
thouty
ouhuh?Zo,
your
mom,
yournephewandni
eceneedy
ou
pl
easewakeupnowpl
ease”She
chuckl
esandsnuf
fl
esi
sshecr
ying?
“
Okayf
ineIal
soneedy
ouasmuchI
don’
twantt
oadmi
tit
.Ican’
tbel
i
evei
t’
s
t
ooky
out
oli
eont
hisdeat
hbedf
orme
t
oreal
i
zehowmuchdoIcar
eabouty
ou.
It
houghtIhat
eyouknowokaymay
be
nothat
ebutIhat
ewhaty
oudi
dbecause
Il
ostmyhusbandandmydaught
er
t
hroughy
ourv
endet
ta.Thel
ossi
sjust
t
oomuchandunbear
abl
ebutbel
i
eve
meI
’
ddoany
thi
ngf
ory
out
owakeup
r
ightnow.Youdon’
tdeser
vet
hisnoone
doesnomat
terwhat
.Youar
eagr
eat
manKhuz
ani
andcomet
othi
nkofi
tI
woul
dn’
thav
emadei
toutal
i
veal
lthese
y
ear
swi
thouty
ou.IknowIwasal
way
s
i
nsul
ti
ngouandt
ell
i
ngy
ouhowmuch
doIhat
eyoubuty
ounev
ergott
ir
edof
me.Youwer
eal
way
sbymysi
demaki
ng
sur
ethatI
’
m wel
l
.Youal
way
sgav
eme
hopet
hatonedayy
ouwi
l
lfi
ndmy
daught
erIknowInev
ert
oldy
out
hisbut
Ir
eal
l
yappr
eci
atehowmuchy
ouar
e
t
ryi
ngy
ourbestt
obet
her
eformeno
mat
terhowhar
dthesi
tuat
ioni
sfory
ou.
Pl
easecomebackI
’
m beggi
ngy
ou”She
sobsIcan’
thel
pbutnot
icehowher
sobssl
i
cesmyhear
tint
otwopi
eces.I
t
ryt
oopenmyey
esev
ent
houghi
t’
s
pr
ovest
obeami
ssi
onbutI
’
m notgi
vi
ng
up.If
inal
l
yopent
hem,
foramoment
ary
momentI
’
m conf
usedwher
eIam unt
ilI
l
ookar
oundmysur
roundi
ngs.I
’
mina
hospi
tal
Icl
osemyey
esagai
nandt
ryt
o
r
ecal
ltheev
ent
sthatl
edme.Ev
ery
thi
ng
pl
aysl
i
keamov
iei
nmymi
ndanda
scr
eam escapesmyl
i
ps
“
Mir
a!”
“
Heyheycal
m down”say
sthesof
tvoi
ce
agai
nbr
ushi
ngmyheadandwhenI
bl
i
nkmyey
esopenher
eshei
slooki
ng
atmewi
thsomuchwor
ryandt
ear
s
“
Mir
a”Iwhi
speri
ndef
eatasi
thi
tme
t
hatIl
osther
.Ihav
enodoubtt
hatwas
def
ini
tel
yher
.I’
m sost
upi
dIshoul
dn’
t
hav
efol
l
owedt
hem,
Ishoul
d’v
efounda
wayt
ogett
hrought
hem.IguessIwas
t
ooanx
ioust
hatIf
orgott
hatI
tcoul
dbe
possi
blet
hatshe’
skeptwi
thoutherown
wi
l
ltof
ulf
il
lwhat
evert
heyt
ookherf
or
butshedi
dn’
tsoundandl
ookl
i
kea
per
sonwho’
skeptwi
thoutherownwi
l
l
ormay
beshewaspr
etendi
ngormay
be
t
heycl
eanedhermemor
yohJesus!I
needt
osav
eher
.
“
Stopwor
ryi
ngaboutMi
raKhuz
ani
your
heal
thcomesf
ir
st.Let
’smecal
lthe
doct
or”
“
Nohel
pmegetoutofher
eIneedt
o
f
indMi
ra”It
ryt
ogetoutbutmybodyi
s
i
npai
n.Ihav
ebandagesonei
swr
apped
onmyt
ummyt
heot
heronei
sonmyl
eft
ar
m.
“
Khuz
ani
stopi
tmaany
ouar
ehur
ti
ng
y
our
sel
f!
”
“
Iwantt
ogetoutofher
eBongaIhav
e
not
imet
owast
e!”
“
Khuz
ani
maan!Youhav
ebeeni
na
comaf
ort
woweeksy
ouneedt
otakei
t
easy
!YouknowhowmuchIwanty
out
o
gooutt
her
eandl
ookf
ormydaught
er
butr
ightnowy
ouneedt
oheal
fir
st
pl
easeThabz
olo”Ohdi
dshej
ustcal
lme
wi
thmycl
an?Ican’
thel
pasmi
l
ethat
t
ugsmyl
i
ps,
she’
sri
ghtIneedt
obef
ull
y
r
ecov
eredbef
oreIt
akeont
hese
bast
ardst
hathav
eMi
ra.Ihopebyt
hat
t
imei
twon’
tbet
ool
ate.
“
CanIhav
ewat
er”myt
hroati
sdr
y,she
get
swat
erf
ormeandhel
pmedr
inks.I
t
ryt
osi
tupst
rai
ghtwi
thherassi
stance
“
Youar
ecomf
ort
abl
enow”Inodwi
th
myhead
“
YousayIhav
ebeenher
efort
wo
weeks?
”
“
YesI
’
m happyy
ouar
ewake.Your
daught
ermi
ssesy
ousomuch.Zoand
y
ourmom ar
eamessandt
heyar
e
al
way
sfi
ght
ing.I
t’
sbeenqui
tean
emot
ional
drai
ningt
woweeks”
“
I’
m sor
ryt
oputy
ouguy
sthr
ought
hat
.
Wher
ear
ethey
?”
“
Zoi
swi
thherhusbandar
eatt
hehot
el.
Yourmom wi
thEmi
hleaty
ourcousi
ns
house.Theweddi
ngwaspost
ponedwhy
y
oudi
dn’
ttel
lmey
ouwer
ecomi
ngt
o
y
ourcousi
n’
sweddi
ng”Ichuckl
e
“
Youdi
dn’
tletmemosy
ousai
dthe
l
i
ght
ningmustst
ri
keme”Igi
ggl
e
“
Iwaspr
ophesy
ingi
fyoudi
dn’
tcome
her
eyouwoul
dn’
tbeshot
,what
happenedv
elewhoev
ert
hatshoty
ou
want
edy
oudeadKhuz
ani
3bul
l
ets”
Idon’
twantt
odi
scl
oset
hei
nfor
mat
ionI
hav
efi
rstbecauseI
’
m notsur
eabouti
t
andIdon’
twantt
ogi
veherhi
ghhopes
onl
ytof
indoutt
hatwasn’
tMi
raIwas
wr
ong.
“
IfIt
ell
youIwoul
dbel
yi
ngIt
hinkt
hey
wer
emi
staki
ngmewi
thsomeoneel
se.
”
“
Gody
oucoul
dhav
edi
edKhuz
ani
”she
bl
i
nkshert
ear
sback
“
I’
m adi
ehar
d…Doy
ouhav
eyourphone
wi
thy
ou?
”
“
Yes”
“
Pleasel
endmeIneedt
omakeacal
l
”
shet
akesoutherphonef
rom herbl
ouse
andgi
vei
ttome.It
akei
tandmakea
cal
l
“
Spi
j
oms”
“
Heymanhowz
it”
“
I’
m goodandy
ou?
”
“
I’
mfi
neIhav
eaj
obf
ory
ou”
“
Gibel
aphekway
o”
“
Cany
oudi
gsomei
nfof
ormeabout
t
hisnewDj
Star
.Iwi
l
lsendy
ou
i
nfor
mat
ionr
ightnow”
“
Consi
deri
tdone”
“
Shar
p”Ihangupandsendhi
m at
ext
aboutwher
etheconcer
twasand
ev
ery
thi
ngt
hatcoul
dhel
pthendel
ete
t
hemessage
“
Thanky
ou”Igi
vehert
hephone
“
Ihopey
ouwer
en’
tcal
l
ingabouty
our
gi
rl
fr
iendswi
thmyphone”Il
augh
Icansensej
eal
ousybutwi
thBongay
ou
woul
dnev
erknow.
“
Ofcour
senotandI
’
m gl
adIwasshot
”
“
Whywoul
dyousayt
hatar
eyousi
ck?
wewer
ewor
ri
edabouty
ou!
”Shesnaps
“
Iwoul
dn’
thav
egotachancet
ohear
y
oupour
ingy
ourhear
taboutme.I
al
way
sthoughty
ouhat
emenott
hatI
bl
amey
out
hough”
“
Youhear
dme?
”
“
Yourv
oicewast
heonl
ythi
ngIcoul
d
hear
”shesmi
l
esandsqueez
esmyhand.
Ourey
esmeetandt
heyshar
ethi
s
momentbuti
tdoesn’
tlastl
ongasshe
l
etsgoofmyhandl
i
kei
t’
sbur
ning
“
Uhm I
’
mleav
ingnowIhav
etol
et
ev
ery
oneknowt
haty
ouar
eawake”
“
Stayabi
tlongerpl
ease”
“
Hay
i”
“
Why
?”
“
Wear
enotf
ri
ends”
“
Awr
eal
l
ynow?
”
“
YesIhav
etogo”y
ouseewhatImean,
t
hemomentIt
hinkI
’
m wi
nni
nghershe
changes.
“
Whywer
eyouher
efr
om t
hef
ir
stpl
ace
ke!
”Isnapi
twasn’
tmyi
ntent
ionatal
l
“
BecauseIcar
edammi
tandIhat
ethatI
car
emor
ethenIshoul
dKhuz
ani
!GodI
sof
ucki
ngcar
eabouty
oui
t’
sfeel
sso
wr
ongandi
t’
smakesmeangr
y!”She
makesherwayt
othedoor
“
BongaI
m sor
rypl
easedon’
tgo”
“
HayKhuz
ani
uyat
hakat
hawena!Why
doIcar
esomuchhuh?Youar
eusi
ng
v
oodooonmeI
t’
stheonl
yex
planat
ion,
Ishoul
dhat
eyounonoi
nfactIhat
eyou
y
esIhat
eyouwena!NGI
YAKUZONDA!
”
j
ustasshe’
saboutt
oopent
hedoor
Khocymakesherwayi
n.Lor
dwhati
s
shedoi
ngher
e?
“
OhI
’
m sor
ryi
fIi
nter
rupt
edandIsee
t
hatourpat
ienti
sawake”Bongai
s
l
ooki
ngherf
rom t
het
oesupt
oherhai
r
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
eKhocy
?”Iask
“
Ihadt
otaket
hef
ir
stf
li
ghtwhen
Lwandl
etol
dmewhathappened.How
ar
eyouf
eel
i
nghet
oldmey
ouar
ein
comaI
’
m gl
ady
ouar
eawake”
“
I’
mfi
neasy
oucansee”Ther
e’s
awkwar
dsi
l
enceandex
changeofl
ooks
bet
weenherandBonga.
“
Uhm l
etmecomebackl
aterIseet
hatI
i
nter
rupt
ed”shewal
ksoutandI
’
m
ex
pect
ingBongat
ofol
l
owherbutshe
comesbackandsi
tsont
hechai
rnex
tto
me.
“
Ithoughty
ouar
eleav
ing”
“
Ichangedmymi
nd”Ismi
l
e
“
Ain’
tyouscar
edofv
oodoonow?
”Iask
wi
thasmi
rkshef
rowns
“
I’
m notscar
edofwi
tchcr
aft
.Nov
oodoo
f
ormedagai
nstmeshal
lpr
osper
!”Ican’
t
hel
pbutbur
sti
ntol
aught
erhur
ti
ng
my
sel
fint
hepr
ocess.
HappyBi
rt
hdayNoz
ukoNobul
ali
Pr
omi
seMt
iki
CHAPTER37

Imakemywayt
othebedr
oom wi
th
t
ear
sst
reami
ngdownmyf
ace.It
akeof
f
t
hehoodi
eandputi
tbackt
ohi
scl
oset
.I
don’
tunder
standwhyhei
sst
il
lkeepi
ng
herhoodi
e.Lwandl
enev
ershout
satme
especi
all
ynotl
i
ket
hatandnoti
nfr
ont
ofhi
sli
tt
lesi
ster
.Ipackmybagandcal
l
anUberwhi
l
eati
t.OnceI
’
m doneIwal
k
t
othel
i
vingr
oom wi
thmybag,
Ifi
ndhi
m
wi
tht
hel
i
ttl
ebr
atwat
chi
ngamov
ie.
“
I’
mleav
ing”Isayandt
heybot
hlookat
me.
“
Baby
”Heget
supf
rom t
hecouchand
wal
kst
ome
“
Whyar
eyoul
eav
ing?
”Real
l
y,he’
s
aski
ngmet
hatorhehonest
lydon’
tget
whathedi
d?
“
Bye”It
urnandwal
kawayhef
oll
ows
mewhenwegett
otheki
tchenhe
pr
essesmeagai
nstt
hef
ri
dgeand
ki
ssest
hel
i
vingshi
toutofmet
hatI
dr
opmybagont
hef
loorandwr
apmy
ar
msar
oundhi
sneck.Thi
sboydr
ives
mecr
azyhi
stouchmakesmef
orget
t
hatI
’
m madathi
m,Ipushhi
m andwe
ar
ebot
hbr
eat
hingheav
il
y
“
Don’
tleav
e,I
’
m sor
ryf
orshout
ingat
y
ou.Idi
dn’
tmeant
o”
“
Real
l
yLwandl
e,di
dyouhav
etoshout
atmel
i
ket
hati
nfr
ontofy
ourl
i
ttl
esi
ster
andIdon’
tunder
stand,
it’
sjusta
hoodi
e!”Iwanthi
mtoadmi
tthati
t’
s
Mi
ra’
shoodi
e.
“
Iwasoutofl
i
ne,
Iknowst
handwasami
pl
easef
orgi
veme.Youar
eri
ghtIdon’
t
hav
eapr
obl
em wi
thy
ouwear
ingmy
cl
othesbutnott
hathoodi
e.”
“
Why
?”Hebr
usheshi
shead
“
It
’sbel
ongst
oMi
ra”ohsoi
t’
str
ue
“
Whydoy
oust
il
lhav
eit
?”
“
Whatdoy
oumean?
”
“
Yousai
dyouhav
emov
edonr
ight
,then
whyar
eyoukeepi
ngi
t?”
“
Wher
eshoul
ditgo?
”
“
Tohermom”
“
Whati
fIl
i
kekeepi
ngi
t?”Wow
“
Thatmeansy
ouar
est
il
li
nlov
ewi
thher
Lwandl
e!”
“
I’
m notbaby
”
“
Doy
oust
il
lweari
t”Hedoesn’
trepl
y
“
Wowwhydoy
oust
il
lwearherhoodi
eif
y
ouhav
emov
edonLwandl
e!”
“
It
’sj
ustahoodi
eAy
andaandi
t’
smi
ne
nowwhyshoul
dInotweari
t”
“
Wel
li
t’
sdoesn’
tsi
twel
lwi
thme.
”Ihear
ahoot
“
That
’smyUber
”Ibendt
otakemybag
buthest
opsmebycuppi
ngbot
hofmy
handsi
ntohi
s
“
Don’
tgopl
ease,
Iwi
l
lst
opwear
ingi
t.I
l
ovey
oubabyandIdon’
twantust
o
f
ight
.Ihav
emov
edonf
rom Mi
ra,
please
bel
i
eveme”
“
Idon’
tknowLwandl
e”
“
Tel
lmewhatt
odobaby
,thatwi
l
lmake
y
ouhappy
”
“
Bur
nit
”Heswal
l
owhar
d
“
DoIhav
eto?
”
“
Mxmy
ouaskedmewhatt
odonowy
ou
aski
ngmet
hatshi
t!Youknowwhat
,I’
m
l
eav
ing!
”Iy
ankmyhandsf
rom hi
s
pal
msandt
akemybagont
hef
loor
“
Okayf
ine,
Iwi
l
lbur
nit
.Don’
tgo
st
handwasami
please.For
giv
eme,
I’
m
beggi
ngy
ou”Isi
gh
“
Theuberi
sal
readyher
e”
“
Don’
twor
ryIwi
l
lpayf
ori
t,j
ustgoput
y
ourbagbacki
nmybedr
oom andIwi
l
l
sor
toutt
heUberi
ssue”
“
Okay
”
“
Ilov
eyouYay
awami
”Ibl
ushandki
ss
hi
m bef
oremaki
ngmywayt
othe
bedr
oom.Iwal
kbackt
ocont
inuewi
th
mypot
s.Lwandl
ewal
ksi
nandwr
aps
hi
sar
msar
oundmywai
stf
rom t
he
behi
ndandki
ssesmynecksendi
ng
chi
l
lsdownmyspi
ne.
“
Imi
ssy
ou”Hewhi
sper
sinmyear
“
ButIhav
ebeenher
efort
woweeks
baby
”
“
Ican’
tgetenoughofy
ou”Hebi
tesmy
ear
lobeImoansof
tl
y
“
I’
m cooki
ngLwandl
eandl
i
ttl
ebr
a..
.Sno
i
snotsl
eepi
ngy
ouknowhowshei
s”
“
Iwi
l
lbequi
ck”Honest
lyI
’
mtempt
ed
butwewi
l
lgeti
tonl
ater
.Oneoft
he
t
hingsIl
oveaboutLwandl
eishi
ssex
game.Damnhedoest
het
hingst
hat
makest
hepot
stobedone.
“
Letsav
etheener
gyf
ort
oni
ght
”
“
Ican’
twai
t”Hespanksmybut
tbef
ore
maki
nghi
swayt
othel
i
vingr
oom.As
I
’
m busywi
thmypot
smyphoner
ings.
I
t’
smommydear
est
.
“
Mommy
”
“
Heybabyhowar
eyou”
“
I’
mfi
neandy
our
sel
f?”
“
I’
m al
sof
inebabyIwaschecki
ngupon
y
ou”
“
Ncooy
ouar
esosweet
.Imi
ssy
ou
guy
s”
“
Whenar
eyoucomi
nghomev
ele?
”
“
Nger
ecessmama”
“
Ican’
twai
t”Wet
alksomemor
ethen
wesayourgoodby
e.Iwal
ktot
hel
i
ving
r
oom wi
tht
hel
i
ght
er.
“
Her
ebaby
”Hesi
ghsandwal
kst
he
bedr
oom t
hencomesbackaf
terf
ew
mi
nut
eswi
tht
hehoodi
e.Het
hrowsi
tin
af
ir
epl
aceandl
i
ghti
t
“
Lwandl
e,whatar
eyoudoi
ng!
”
“
munchki
ncan’
tyouseewhatI
’
m doi
ng”
“
Youar
ebur
ningMi
ra’
shoodi
ewhy
!”
“
Youar
est
il
lyoungmunchki
nto
under
stand”
“
HawuLwandl
eyoushoul
dhav
egi
veni
t
t
omei
fyoudon’
twanti
tany
mor
e”she
bl
i
nksandt
ear
sst
ream downherf
ace.
“
I’
m sor
rymunchki
n”
“
Iknowt
haty
ouar
eangr
ythatshel
eft
y
ou,
I’
m al
soangr
yatherf
orl
eav
ingus
butt
obur
nherhoodi
epho”Ir
oll
my
ey
es
“
Munchki
nI…”Thel
i
ttl
ebr
atr
unsaway
bef
oreLwandl
ecoul
dfi
nish.Het
ri
est
o
r
unaf
terherbutIst
ophi
m
“
Letherbe”
“
She’
scr
yingYay
a”
“
Shewi
l
lcomear
ound.Snoneedst
o
knowt
hatt
her
ecomesat
imei
nli
fe
wher
eyouhav
etomov
eonandf
orgot
aboutt
hosewhol
efty
ouandf
ocust
o
t
hosewhowi
thy
ouont
hepr
esent
”
At7pm Idi
shupf
ort
het
hreeofus.
Di
nneri
susual
l
yeat
enont
hedi
ning
t
abl
eint
hedi
ningr
oom butsi
ncet
he
par
ent
sar
enother
eweeatsupperi
n
t
hel
i
vingr
oom whi
l
ewat
chi
ngt
v.
“
Thanky
oumyl
ove”Lwandl
esay
swhen
Igi
vehi
m hi
sfood.Iwal
ktoSno’
s
bedr
oom andf
indhersl
eepi
ngsoIl
et
herbe.
“
Howi
sshe?
”Itt
akesmesomuchof
menott
orol
lmyey
es.Youcoul
dsee
howhur
thei
s,I
’
m notev
ensur
enowi
f
i
t’
sbecausehi
sli
tt
lesi
sterwascr
yingor
i
t’
sbecausehef
eel
shor
ri
blef
orbur
ning
t
hehoodi
e
“
She’
ssl
eepi
ng,
Ithi
nkweshoul
dlether
bebecausenotsol
ongagosheat
ea
sandwi
chImadef
orher
”Henodswi
th
hi
shead,
Isi
tnex
ttohi
m weeatour
supperwhi
l
ewat
chi
ngt
v.Oncewear
e
doneIcol
l
ectt
hedi
shesandgot
othe
ki
tchent
owasht
hem.Af
terwashi
ngt
he
di
sheswer
eti
ret
osl
eep.If
eel
hisbul
ge
poki
ngmybut
tandhi
shandscar
essi
ng
myt
high
“
Baby
”Hewhi
sper
sagai
nstmyear
sand
ni
bbl
esonmyear
lobecausi
ngmet
o
moansof
tl
y.
“
Yesmyl
ove”
“
Ilov
eyousomuch”
“
Ilov
eyoumor
e”Het
urnsmear
ound
andgetont
opofmebef
orecl
aimi
ngmy
l
i
psi
ntohi
s.Theki
ssi
shur
ri
edand
i
mpat
ientIj
ustknewt
hatI
’
m aboutt
he
geti
troughbutIdon’
tcar
easl
ongas
wemakei
tout
.Hehasnot
imef
orf
ore
pl
aybecauset
henex
tthi
ngIheari
shi
m
ent
eri
ngmybar
elywetpussy
.Iscr
eam
asIdi
gmynai
l
sonhi
sar
ms.Hest
art
s
poundi
ngmehar
d,j
ustt
henweheara
knockondoor
.
“
Lwandl
e”
“
Munchki
n”
“
Idon’
tfeel
sogoodcanIpl
easesl
eep
wi
thy
ou”
Hegr
oansasIhuf
f
“
I’
m comi
ng”Hegetupf
rom meandget
dr
essedi
nbox
erswhi
l
stIal
soget
dr
essed.Oncewear
ebot
hdonehe
wal
kst
othedoorandopensi
tforhi
s
l
i
ttl
esi
ster
,whot
hrowsher
sel
finhi
s
ar
ms.Dr
amat
icmuch!Shel
ooksf
inet
o
me!Hepi
cksherupandt
heygeti
nto
bed,
Snoi
sint
hemi
ddl
e.
“
Wher
edoesi
thur
tSno”Iaskt
ryi
ng
har
dtomaskmyannoy
ance
“
Ifeel
diz
zyandmyhear
tissor
e”
“
Youwi
l
lbeokaymymunchki
n”
Lwandl
esay
sashecr
adl
esheri
nhi
s
ar
ms.Il
ookatherasshe’
sfaci
ngme,
shest
ickouthert
ongueatme.Lor
d
pl
easegi
vemest
rengt
htodeal
wit
hthi
s
spoi
l
edbr
at!

Forabr
iefmomentI
’
m atl
ossofwor
ds,
t
hisi
shuget
heycan’
tleav
ethei
rli
ves
her
eandgot
oov
erseasj
ustt
osav
eme.
Iknowt
hatI
’
mli
ket
hei
rdaught
er,
inf
act
Iam t
hei
rdaught
erandt
heyar
emy
par
ent
saswel
lbutIcan’
tdi
smi
sst
he
f
actt
hatI
’
m nott
hei
rbl
ood.Icamewi
th
t
oomuchbaggageanddangeri
nthei
r
l
i
vesbutst
il
ltheyi
nsi
stondoi
ngmor
e
andmor
e.
“
Mom,
Dadt
hisi
shugeIcan’
tlety
ou
guy
sleav
eyourl
i
vesher
eandgot
o
ov
erseas”
“
Butbabyi
t’
stheonl
yway
…”Ii
nter
jectI
knowt
hat
’sr
udebuthey
“
Mom pl
easey
ouhav
edoneenoughf
or
menow,
youcan’
tpackupandl
i
vey
our
l
i
feher
einKeny
a.That
’shugemommy
andwhataboutDad’
swor
kand
busi
nesses,
whowoul
drunt
hem?
”
“
YouknowIdon’
thav
etowor
kandr
un
mybusi
nessesf
ormy
sel
f.Ihav
epeopl
e
whoIt
rustandwhowoul
dn’
thesi
tat
eto
r
unt
hem.Iwi
l
lcomecheckon
ev
ery
thi
ngev
erynowandt
hen.The
t
rav
ell
i
ngwi
l
lbeat
empor
aryt
hing
may
beaf
teray
earort
woIwi
l
lsel
lthem
t
osomeonewhowi
l
lbei
nter
est
edand
st
artnewbusi
nessesont
hatsi
de”
“
That
’sahugesacr
if
icedad,
whatabout
y
ourl
i
feher
ehuh?Ican’
tal
l
owt
hat
”
“
It
’sasacr
if
icet
hatanypar
entwoul
d
maket
opr
otectt
hei
rdaught
er”mom
say
s
“
ButI
’
m noty
ourbi
ologi
cal
daught
er,
y
oucan’
tdoal
loft
hisf
orme”
“
Youbecameourbi
ologi
cal
daught
er
t
hedaywet
ooky
oui
nMuuj
i
za.The
daught
erwenev
erhadpl
easeal
l
owus
t
opl
ayourr
ole.
”Dadsay
s
“
Unt
ilwhenwi
l
lwekeepr
unni
ng.Whati
f
Khumal
oev
ent
ual
l
ytr
ackusdown
ov
erseast
henwhatwoul
dhappen?
”
“
Itt
ookhi
m 4y
ear
stoal
mostf
indy
ou
whi
l
eyouar
ear
oundAf
ri
cahowmuch
mor
ewoul
ditt
akehi
mtof
indy
oui
n
ov
erseas?I
t’
sabi
gwor
ldbabyhemi
ght
nev
erf
indy
ou”mom say
s
“
Okayl
et’
ssayhef
indsmey
ear
slat
er
whatwoul
dhappen?Wewi
l
lmov
e
agai
n?”
“
Wewi
l
ldeal
wit
hthatwheni
t’
s
happenedMuuj
i
zaandIwi
l
lmakesur
e
t
hatIhav
emor
ethanonePIwhowoul
d
keepaney
eonhi
m”Dadr
esponds
“
Mom,
DadI
’
m si
ckandt
ir
edoft
hisman!
I
t’
sti
meIf
acehi
m onceandf
oral
l
!
Mom f
ear
edhi
m unt
ilshel
ostherl
i
fe,
I
won’
tdot
hesamet
hing!I
fheki
l
lsme
sobei
t!Saf
auKhumal
ohe’
snotGod,
I
won’
tli
vemyl
i
fei
nfearany
mor
e
becauseofanabusi
vebl
oodyasshol
e!”
“
Heywat
chhowy
out
alkt
ous!
”
“
I’
m sor
rydadbuthonest
lyI
’
mti
red.I
’
m
r
eal
l
yti
red.I
nthesepassedt
woday
sI
t
houghthar
daboutt
his.I
’
m goi
ngback
t
oSAt
ofacehi
m”
“
Youar
ebei
ngsel
fi
shr
ightnow!Youar
e
t
hinki
ngabouty
our
sel
fonl
y,whatabout
me,
yourdad,
StarandKamar
iahuh?
Hav
eyout
houghthowi
twoul
dmakeus
f
eel
ify
oudi
e?Wehav
einv
est
edso
muchf
eel
i
ngsi
nyouandy
ouwantt
ogo
t
othatmanandal
l
owhi
mtoki
l
lyou?
Howsel
fi
shandungr
atef
uli
sthathuh!
”
mom shout
s
“
Mom t
ryt
ounder
stand…”Shecut
sme
of
f
“
Under
standwhatMuuj
i
za?Under
stand
t
haty
oucamei
ntoourl
i
veswet
ook
car
eofy
ou,
riskedourl
i
vest
opr
otect
y
ou,
wegav
eyounot
hingbutpur
elov
e,
wet
reat
edy
oul
i
keourdaught
erand
nowy
ouwantt
ogot
othatsameman
whowant
stoki
l
lyou?Youwantmet
o
under
standt
haty
ouar
etaki
ngawayal
l
t
hej
oyIhadf
orhav
ingadaught
er?To
f
eel
howi
t’
sli
ket
obeamot
herl
i
keany
ot
herwoman?I
sthatwhaty
ouwantme
t
ounder
stand?Youknowwhati
t’
sokay
Muuj
i
zai
fthatwhaty
ouwantgo,
Igi
ve
y
oumybl
essi
ngs”If
eel
myhear
t
shat
ter
ingi
npi
eces.
“
Mom…”
“
GoMuuj
i
za”Ihearherf
oot
steps
wal
ki
ngaway
.
“
I’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
tmeant
obeungr
atef
ul
andsel
fi
sh”
“
Iknowsweet
hear
tletmegocheckon
y
ourmom”Ihearhi
m wal
ki
ngawayt
oo
andbur
sti
ntot
ear
s.I
twasnotmy
i
ntent
ionatal
ltocomeacr
ossassel
fi
sh
andungr
atef
ulIwi
shmom canal
so
under
standt
hati
t’
sdoesn’
tsi
twel
lwi
th
met
owat
cht
hem l
i
vingt
hei
rli
vesl
i
ke
t
his,
knowi
ngi
t’
smyf
aul
t.

Thet
ensi
oni
nthi
shousei
swei
ghi
ng
downonme,
it’
sbeenal
mostt
hree
weeksnowmom andIar
enoti
nagood
speaki
ngt
erms.She’
sdoi
ngev
ery
thi
ng
shecant
oav
oidmeandi
thur
tsmeso
much.St
arhasbeent
ryi
ngt
otal
ktoher
butshe’
shear
ingnone.Wehav
e
body
guar
dsal
lov
ert
hehouseandt
his
i
soneoft
her
easonIwantt
oface
Khumal
o.Wecan’
tli
veourl
i
vesl
i
ket
his
andspendal
otofmoneyi
nbody
guar
ds
andPI
’
s.Theyhav
eal
readyspentso
muchbyt
aki
ngcar
eofmeandmaki
ng
sur
ethatIl
i
veacomf
ort
abl
eli
feas
possi
bleasIcan.Asusual
I’
m wokenby
Rockyl
i
cki
ngmyf
aceandbar
king.
Rockyi
sagol
denr
etr
iev
erhe’
s
i
ntel
l
igent
,af
fect
ionat
eandpl
ayf
uly
et
gent
leespeci
all
ywi
thchi
l
drenhence
Kamar
ial
i
kest
opl
aywi
thhi
m.Idon’
t
hav
est
rengt
htowakeupt
odaybutSt
ar
i
nsi
stsonmeget
ti
ngsomef
reshai
r.
OnceI
’
m donewi
thmyhy
gienepr
ocess
andget
ti
ngdr
essedImakemyway
downst
air
swi
thRockygui
dingme.I
hearmom andSt
art
alki
ngi
ntheki
tchen
andgr
eett
hem.Mom i
ssocol
das
usual
“
Hel
l
omyboobear
”sheki
ssesmy
cheek.Isi
tdownandhav
emybr
eakf
ast
bef
oret
aki
ngmypi
l
ls
“
Wher
ear
eyout
aki
ngme,
Iwantust
o
gowi
thKamar
ia”
“
Kamar
iawentt
othemal
lwi
thy
our
f
ather
”mom say
s
”
Okayuhm mom I
’
m sor
ryaboutbei
ng
i
nconsi
der
ate,
Itwasnev
ermyi
ntent
ion.
Iwon’
tgobackt
oSAany
mor
ewecan
got
oov
erseas”
“
Real
l
y?”
“
YesMama”
“
Ohbabyt
hanky
ousomuch!
”She
squeez
esmei
nherar
ms.
“
Wel
lthenwehav
enot
imet
owast
elet
mecal
lyourf
atherandl
ethi
m know”I
canheari
nherhearv
oicet
hatshe’
s
happy
.
“
Wear
eleav
ingAunt
y”
“
Pleasebesaf
eSt
ar”
“
Wehav
ebody
guar
dsAunt
ydon’
twor
ry
andwewi
l
lbequi
ck”Wel
eav
ewi
tht
wo
oft
hebody
guar
dsf
oll
owi
ngus.St
arand
Iar
esi
ngi
ngal
ongt
hemusi
c.

“
Sout
hc,
sout
hb,
111,
23,
west
ie
Kangemi
,Nadoni
,nambananebaby
Ai
n’
tnoci
tyl
i
kemaci
tyohnonono,
Na-
Nai
robi
Theycan’
tdoi
tli
kewedoi
tint
he254,
Na-Nai
robi
Mahust
lerNamadem supuu
Kawangwar
etobur
ubur
u,
Il
ovemaci
tyohy
esIdo,
Na,
NaNa-
Nai
robi
St
oneEJi
we
25f
low,
weonawav
ekaami
xza
demakuf
u
Vi
l
enabounceKwahi
itr
ackuki
penda
hal
l
achuchu
Ji
we,
May
oyoay
e,wegott
henunu
I
’
minl
ovewi
thmyci
tybossI
’
m goi
ng
kookoo
Hi
iNi
yamadem wal
i
okul
engamt
aani
,
Mki
kut
anaNai
robi
wanawav
eKwambal
i
Lukul
ukuNi
yawadhi
i
,ut
adhani
tam f
ord
Saay
aki
nengeshi
kamav
anga,
Sanf
ord
Ni
koi
dhaay
amapar
ari
rakangany
a
Bi
gupmahust
ler
,waseewanaot
armac
MAf
orei
gner
swal
emakwao
wamehama
Machokochwal
eji
j
ikwaopi
aNi
mama
I
’
m keepi
ngi
treal
,keepi
ngi
tlocal
I
’
m sor
awor
igi
nal
flowt
hough
N-
air
obi
ayai
,yah,
yahy
ah,
it’
smagi
c
whenI
’
m ont
hemi
c
Mse-
yaay
aiy
ahy
ah
(
Hook)
Ai
n’
tnoci
tyl
i
kemaci
tyohnononoNa-
Nai
robi
Theycan’
tdoi
tli
kewedoi
tint
he254
Na-Nai
robi
(
Jij
iya)
Mahust
lerNamadem supuu
Kawangwar
etobur
ubur
u,
Il
ovemaci
tyohy
esIdoNa,
NaNa-
Nai
robi
”She’
snotonl
yaDj
onl
ybuta
goodsi
ngert
oo
“
Youar
emul
ti
-t
alent
edSt
ar”
“
Itr
ybutIcannev
ersi
ngl
i
key
ou.Damn
boobear
,yourv
oicecanheal
broken
soul
s,changedr
unkar
dsandwhor
es
i
ntobor
nagai
ns”Igi
ggl
e
“
Hai
sukay
oul
i
e”
“
I’
mtel
l
ingt
het
rut
h”
“
Youal
way
shav
eani
cet
hingt
osay
aboutmewena”
“
Wel
lthat
’sbecauseev
ery
thi
ngi
sni
ce
abouty
ou”Ismi
l
ehonest
lyIl
ovehowI
f
eel
whenI
’
m wi
thSt
ar.Shemakesme
f
eel
happy
,car
efr
eeandy
oungwhatam
Isay
ingofcour
seI
’
myoungt
het
hingi
s
t
hepai
nandbaggageI
’
m car
ryi
ng
makesmef
eel
li
keI
’
mtoool
d.
“
Wear
eher
e,come”
“
Wher
ear
ewe?
”
“
Uhur
uPar
k”Shet
akesmyhandwhi
l
e
t
heot
heri
shol
dingRocky
’shar
ness.
Shet
ell
smeal
lki
ndsofact
ivi
ti
eswe
coul
denj
oywest
artwi
thboatr
idi
ngi
na
l
ake.Ienj
oyev
erymomentofi
tandwe
r
etur
nback.
“
It
’sal
way
sfunt
ospendt
imewi
thy
ou
St
ar”
“
I’
m gl
ady
ouar
eenj
oyi
ngandt
her
e’sa
l
ott
hatwest
il
lgoi
ngt
odoev
eni
n
ov
erseas.
”
“
Youar
eokaywi
thgoi
ngt
oov
erseas?
”
“
Yesi
t’
sahugechangebutIt
hinki
t’
s
woul
dbeagoodchangef
ormycar
eer
.
Forbot
hofourcar
eer
sinf
act
”
“
Buti
twon’
tbeeasy
”
“
Not
hingi
seasyi
nli
febuti
t’
swi
l
lbe
wor
thi
t.
”
“
Ili
kehowy
ouappr
oachev
ery
thi
ngwi
th
posi
ti
vi
ty.
”
“
Iwi
shIcanr
ubi
tof
ftoy
ouaswel
l
”
“
It
’sonl
yamat
teroft
ime”
“
Ilov
eyouBooBear
”
“
Ilov
eyout
ooSt
ar”Shecupsmyf
ace
andIknowshe’
saboutt
oki
ssmebuta
v
oicedi
stur
bsus
“
Mir
a”myhear
tst
opbeat
ingasmuchI
hav
enev
erspentsomucht
imewi
thhi
m
butIcannev
ermi
stakehi
svoi
ce
“
Whot
hef
uckar
eyou?Body
guar
dsdo
y
ourj
ob”St
arsay
s
“
Woahpl
easedon’
thur
tme,
Icamei
n
peace.
”
“
Don’
tli
stent
ohi
m shoothi
m!”
“
Starst
opi
tpl
ease!I
t’
sLwenkosi
’
suncl
e,
Iknowhi
m”
“
Whatdoeshewanther
e?”
“
Let
’sgosomewher
epr
ivat
esot
hatwe
cant
alk”
”
Yougotgames,
guy
sdeal
wit
hhi
m!”
St
arsay
s
“
Pleasel
etmeex
plai
n!Mi
ray
ourmom
i
sal
i
ve,
she’
sdy
ingwi
thouty
ou.
”I
f
reez
eandIcanhearhi
myel
l
ingatt
he
body
guar
dst
olethi
m goand
compl
aini
ngt
hatt
heyar
ehur
ti
nghi
m
“
Ist
hisoneofy
ourames?Yout
hinkI
woul
dbel
i
evey
ouaf
terwhaty
ouand
y
ournephewmademey
ourf
ool
!Iwon’
t
f
all
fori
t.I
’
m not18y
ear
sol
dany
mor
e
Mal
umeKhuz
ani
”
“
IswearMi
ra,
she’
stheonet
hatshot
Khumal
onott
heot
herwayar
ound.
”I
l
augh
“
Youar
ely
ing,
arey
ouwor
kingf
or
Khumal
onow?
”Idon’
tknowwher
eIam
get
ti
ngal
lthi
sbr
aveness.Icanf
eel
angerboi
l
ingwi
thi
nme
“
NoKhumal
oisdead,
yourmom shot
hi
m!”
“
Youar
ely
ing!
”
“
Pleasebel
i
evemeMi
ra”Hesoundsso
desper
ate
“
Howwi
l
lIbel
i
evey
ouwheny
oupl
ayed
mewi
thy
ournephew?Idon’
ttr
usty
ou
any
mor
e!”
“
Heyl
eav
eMuuj
i
zaal
one.Guar
dssor
t
hi
m outper
manent
ly!
”St
arsay
s
“
Ihav
epr
oofMi
ra!Letmecal
lyour
mot
hersot
haty
ouwi
l
lhearherv
oice!
”
“
Let
’sgoMuuj
i
za,
he’
spl
ayi
ngwi
thy
ou.
I
t’
scl
eart
hatt
hismani
swor
kingf
or
Khumal
onoworwhati
fhewantt
ouse
y
out
ogetbackatKhumal
osi
ncet
hei
r
mi
ssi
onf
ail
ed.
”NowI
’
m conf
usedI
don’
tknowwhatt
obel
i
evehesoundsso
si
ncer
ethoughbutIcan’
tdi
smi
sst
he
f
actt
hatt
hismanoncepl
ayedmewhat
woul
dst
ophi
mfr
om doi
ngi
tagai
n.I
hearaphoner
ingi
ngont
heot
hersi
de
“
Khuz
ani
”myhear
tski
psabi
t,Iwi
l
l
nev
ermi
staket
hatv
oiceev
eni
nmy
sl
eep.Ascr
eam i
nvol
unt
ari
l
ysl
i
poutof
mymout
h
“
Mommy
!”
“
Mir
acl
eist
haty
ou?
”Icanhear
uncer
tai
ntymi
xedwi
thshocki
nher
v
oice.I
’
m shaki
ngandmyt
ear
sar
e
st
reami
ngdownmyf
ace.
“
Baby
!St
handwasami
!Tal
ktome!
”I
shakemyheadi
ndi
sbel
i
ef
“
Khuz
ani
what
’sgoi
ngon?Ar
eyou
pl
ayi
ngt
ri
cksonme?
”She’
scr
yingnow
ohmyGodi
t’
sher
.
“
HeyBonga,
I’
m sor
ryt
hatIdi
dn’
ttel
l
y
ouwhyIwasl
eav
ingf
orKeny
a
becauseIdi
dn’
twantt
ogi
vey
ouhi
gh
hopesbutI
’
m wi
thMi
raher
e,she
doesn’
tbel
i
evey
ouar
eal
i
ve,
shet
hinks
y
ouar
edead”
“
Khuz
ani
don’
tpl
ayl
i
ket
hatpl
ease”
“
IfoundherBonga!If
oundourMi
racl
e!”
Ican’
tmi
sst
heex
cit
ementi
nhi
svoi
ce
“
Giv
ehert
hephonel
etmet
alkt
oher
”
“
Mommyy
ou.
..
you.
.ar
e..al
i
..v
e?”Ichoke
onmyt
ear
s
“
Yesbabyy
esmommyi
sal
i
vepl
ease
comebackhome!Comebackhome
sweet
hear
tIl
ovey
ou”
“
Nononoi
t’
sapr
ank,
it’
sapr
ank,
it’
sa
pr
ank,
it’
sapr
ankSt
arwhat
’sgoi
ngon?
Mom i
sdeadr
ight
?ThePIsai
dshe’
s
dead,
she’
sdead,
ufi
l
e,uf
il
e”Icanf
eel
my
sel
flosi
ngmybr
eat
he,
byeachwor
d
comi
ngoutofmymout
hwi
thi
na
secondIbl
ackout
HappyBi
rt
hdayAndaMagambu
Ndungane

CHAPTER38(
unedi
ted)

Icoul
dn’
twai
ttobedi
schar
gedi
t’
sfeel
s
l
i
ket
hemor
eday
sgoesbyt
hesl
i
mmer
t
hechancesar
eformet
ofi
ndMi
ra
henceIdeci
dedt
ohav
epeopl
etol
ook
i
ntot
hemat
terunt
ilt
heyconf
ir
medt
hat
whoi
sSt
arandwher
eisMi
ra.The
momentIwasdi
schar
gedImadeacal
l
t
oacl
osef
ri
endofmi
newhoownsaj
et
t
olendme.Idi
dn’
ttel
lBongaev
ery
thi
ng.
Thel
astt
hingIwanti
stogi
veherhi
gh
hopesf
ornot
hing.Appar
ent
lyt
hef
ami
l
y
t
hathasMi
rai
shar
mlessandcl
eanbutI
di
dn’
twantt
otakeanychancespl
usI
’
m
st
il
lrecov
eri
ngf
rom mygunshot
woundssoIhadt
obr
ingt
woofmy
cousi
nswi
thmet
oKeny
a.Thepl
anwas
t
ogot
otheMwangi
househol
dandt
ry
t
otal
ktot
hem butwhenIt
ri
edt
olocat
e
St
arIsawt
hatshe’
satt
heUhur
uPar
k.I
knewt
hatMi
rai
sal
sot
her
ebecause
sheseemsv
erycl
osewi
tht
hisSt
ar.I
’
m
sur
ether
e’sgoi
ngt
obebody
guar
ds
t
her
ebutatl
eastt
heywon’
thur
tmei
na
publ
i
cpl
ace.Themomentmyey
esl
ay
onherIf
eel
theur
get
orunt
oherand
squeez
eheri
nmyar
msbutIdon’
twant
t
oscar
eherof
f.I
t’
sreal
l
yhershehas
gr
ownbutshel
ooksv
eryt
hin.
“
Mir
a”
“
Whot
hef
uckar
eyou?Body
guar
dsdo
y
ourj
ob”St
arsay
s.Thebody
guar
ds
appear
sandchar
gesf
orme
“
Woahpl
easedon’
thur
tme,
Icamei
n
peace.
”
Isay
“
Don’
tli
stent
ohi
m shoothi
m!”
“
Starst
opi
tpl
ease!I
t’
sLwenkosi
’
suncl
e,
Iknowhi
m”Mi
rasay
sandmyhear
tleap
wi
thj
oywhensher
ecogni
zesme
“
Whatdoeshewanther
e?”
“
Let
’sgosomewher
epr
ivat
esot
hatwe
cant
alk”
Isay
”
Yougotgames,
guy
sdeal
wit
hhi
m!”
St
arsay
s
“
Pleasel
etmeex
plai
n!Mi
ray
ourmom
i
sal
i
ve,
she’
sdy
ingwi
thouty
ou.
”Ibl
urt
i
toutt
hebody
guar
dst
ryt
opushmebut
It
ell
them t
obackof
ftheyar
e
out
number
edaf
teral
lsot
heybackof
f
“
Ist
hisoneofy
ourgames?Yout
hinkI
woul
dbel
i
evey
ouaf
tery
ouandy
our
nephewmademey
ourf
ool
!Iwon’
tfal
l
f
ori
t.I
’
m not18y
ear
sol
dany
mor
e
Mal
umeKhuz
ani
”Icanseeanger
f
lashesaccr
ossherf
ace
“
IswearMi
ra,
she’
stheonet
hatshot
Khumal
onott
heot
herwayar
ound.
”she
l
aughs
“
Youar
ely
ing,
arey
ouwor
kingf
or
Khumal
onow?
”Iunder
standwhyshe
doesn’
tbel
i
evemeandIf
eel
sohor
ri
ble.
“
NoKhumal
oisdead,
yourmom shot
hi
m!”
“
Youar
ely
ing!
”
“
Pleasebel
i
evemeMi
ra”
Isay
desper
atel
y
“
Howwi
l
lIbel
i
evey
ouwheny
oupl
ayed
mewi
thy
ournephew?Idon’
ttr
usty
ou
any
mor
e!”
“
Heyl
eav
eMuuj
i
zaal
one.Guar
dssor
t
hi
m outper
manent
ly!
”St
arsay
s
“
Ihav
epr
oofMi
ra!Letmecal
lyour
mot
hersot
haty
ouwi
l
lhearherv
oice!
”
“
Let
’sgoMuuj
i
za,
he’
spl
ayi
ngwi
thy
ou.
I
t’
scl
eart
hatt
hismani
swor
kingf
or
Khumal
onoworwhati
fhewantt
ouse
y
out
ogetbackatKhumal
osi
ncet
hei
r
mi
ssi
onf
ail
ed.
”Icanseet
hatshewant
t
obel
i
evemebutshedoesn’
ttr
ustme
any
mor
e.Isi
gnal
formycousi
ntocal
l
Bongaandpr
ayt
hati
twor
ksoutbutshe
f
aint
s.St
arhol
dsherbef
oreshef
all
s
down.
“
Muuj
i
za!
”Thebody
guar
dshel
pherand
t
heyt
akehert
othecar
.It
ell
ourdr
iver
t
ofol
l
owt
hem behi
nd
“
Wher
ear
etheyar
etaki
ngher
”Sl
ova
asks
“
Ithi
nkt
othedoct
or”Isay
.JustasI
pr
edi
ctedt
heyr
ushwi
thheri
nsi
dea
doct
orssur
ger
y.Wear
eal
lwai
ti
ngi
nthe
wai
ti
ngar
eaex
ceptSt
arwhoi
swi
thher
i
nsi
de.Fewmi
nut
esl
ateMrandMr
s
Mwangi
wal
ksi
nwi
thal
i
ttl
egi
rl
.Iknow
t
hem becauseIhav
eseent
hei
rpi
ctur
es
“
Wher
e’smybaby
”Mr
sMwangi
say
s
wi
tht
ear
sinherey
es
“
Theyar
eint
heconsul
tat
ionr
oom wi
th
St
ar”oneoft
hebody
guar
dssay
s
“
Whathappened”Thebot
hbody
guar
ds
l
ooksatus
“
Whoar
ethesemen?
”AsksMrMwangi
“
Greet
ingsMr&Mr
sMwangi
.I’
m
Khuz
ani
Msi
mangof
rom SAI
’
m Mi
ra’
s
mom’
sfr
iend.Wehav
ebeenl
ooki
ngf
or
Mi
raf
ory
ear
snow,hermom i
sal
i
ve
shei
snotdeadandshewant
sher
home”Theybot
hlooksatmel
i
keI
’
m
cr
azy
“
Icancal
lhernowandy
oucanheari
t
byy
our
sel
f”
“
Yout
hinkwewi
l
lbel
i
evet
hatwhati
f
y
ouar
eoneofKhumal
o’sgoons”
“
NoI
’
m notKhumal
oist
heonet
hatwas
shotnotBonga.
”
“
Taket
hesemenoutguar
dsIdon’
twant
t
oseet
hem agai
n!”MrMwangi
say
s
“
MrMwangi
pleasel
etmeex
plai
n
ev
ery
thi
ng”
“
Expl
ainwhat
?Youwantt
ost
eal
my
daught
erl
eav
ebef
oreIcal
lthepol
i
ce!
”
“
Don’
tchasehi
m outDad”Mi
rasay
sas
sheappear
swi
thSt
ar.Oht
hankGod
she’
sawake.Mr
sMwangi
squeez
esher
i
nherar
ms
“
Babyar
eyouokay
?”
“
YesMom I
’
mjustconf
used.It
alkedt
o
mom ont
hephoneIknowi
t’
sherbut
howshe’
sdeadr
ight
?”
“
Letal
lfi
ndapr
ivat
epl
aceandt
alk
aboutt
hispl
ease”Theyagr
eeandwe
dr
ivet
othei
rhouseandset
tl
eont
he
couchi
nthel
i
vingr
oom.
“
Ihav
eal
readyi
ntr
oducedmy
sel
f.These
ar
emycousi
nsSl
ovaandThul
ani
.The
r
easonwear
eher
eit
’sbecausewehav
e
beenl
ooki
ngf
orMi
ra.Iwasi
nCape
Townt
hreeweeksbackandIsawher
wi
thSt
ari
naconcer
tbyt
het
imeIt
ryt
o
r
unaf
tert
hem t
heywer
eal
readydr
ivi
ng
out
.If
oll
owt
hem andIwasshotasy
’al
l
canseet
hatIhav
eanar
m st
ri
ng.
”
“
Youar
etheonewhowasf
oll
owi
ngus
notKhumal
o?”Mi
raasks
“
Yesbabygi
rli
twasme.Khumal
ois
dead”
“
ButIhear
dagunshot
”
“
YesandourPIconf
ir
medt
hathe’
sal
i
ve
andhei
slooki
ngf
orMuuj
i
za.I
t’
sher
mom t
hatdi
ed”MrMwangi
say
s
“
Idon’
tknowwhywoul
dthePIl
i
e.He
l
i
edt
oyouguy
s.Bongai
sal
i
veshe’
sthe
onet
hatshotKhumal
onott
heot
herway
ar
ound”
“
MrMsi
mangoar
eyousur
eaboutwhat
y
ouar
esay
ing?
”
“
Muuj
i
zat
alkedt
ohermom ont
he
phoneuncl
eandshesai
dit
’sr
eal
l
yher
andt
heyev
enhav
esi
mil
arv
oice”St
ar
say
sIcanseet
hatt
hesepeopl
ehav
eno
cl
uet
hatBongai
sal
i
ve.
“
Ifwhaty
ouar
esay
ingi
str
ueMr
Msi
mangot
henwer
eal
l
yapol
ogi
ze
becausewedi
dn’
tknowal
loft
hisand
I
’
m per
plex
edwhywoul
dSkhul
i
e”
Heex
plai
nhowdi
dhemeetMi
raand
t
heyt
ookcar
eofherl
i
ket
hei
rown.They
wer
escar
edoft
hei
rli
vest
heycoul
dn’
t
r
iskt
odoi
nvest
igat
ionbyt
hemsel
ves
hencet
hyhi
redt
hePIbuti
tsseemsl
i
ke
hel
i
edt
othem.Theyseem t
obegood
peopl
eandr
eal
l
ylov
eMi
raandIcansee
t
hatMi
ral
ovest
hem t
oo.
“
Whywoul
dthi
smanl
i
eabout
somet
hinghugel
i
ket
hissomet
hing
doesn’
taddup”St
arsay
sIcan’
thel
pbut
not
icet
hatshel
ooksf
ami
l
iar
.
“
Weneedt
ocal
lhi
m andf
indoutwhat
’s
goi
ngon”MrMwangi
say
sandt
akeout
hi
sphonebuthecan’
treachhi
m.
“
Somom i
sal
i
ve?
”Mi
raasks
i
ncr
edul
ousl
ybutIcanhearahi
ntof
happi
nessi
nherv
oice.
“
Yesy
ouhear
dherandwecancal
lher
nowy
ouwi
l
ltal
ktoher
”
“
NoIwantt
oseeherIwi
l
lbel
i
evei
t
whenIseeherIcan’
tbel
i
evet
his.Ican’
t
bel
i
eveIspent4y
ear
sandsanki
nto
depr
essi
ont
hinki
ngI
’
mresponsi
blef
or
herdeat
hkant
ishe’
sal
i
ve”shebur
st
i
ntot
ear
sandSt
arhol
dsheri
nherar
ms.
“
Muuj
i
zai
scr
yingmommy
”say
sthe
l
i
ttl
ecut
egi
rl
“
Shewi
l
lbeokaybaby
”Mr
sMwangi
r
epl
i
esasshewi
peshert
ear
s
“
Don’
tcr
ysweet
hear
tyouwi
l
lseey
our
mom.Wewi
l
lgot
oget
her
”
“
Ifi
t’
sokaywi
thy
’al
lwecangot
oday
.I
camewi
thaj
et”Theyagr
eeandwe
deci
det
hatwewi
l
ldeal
wit
hthePI
mat
terwhenMi
rahasseenhermom.

-
Ihar
dlysl
eptl
astni
ghtIwast
urni
ngand
t
ossi
ng.Ist
ret
chov
ert
otakemyphone
f
rom t
hebedsi
det
abl
e,t
imer
eads8:
26
am.Ihuf
fwhenIseet
hatIhav
eno
mi
ssedcal
l
snormessages.He
pr
omi
sedt
ocal
lbuthedi
dn’
tasi
fit
’s
notst
ressf
ulenought
hathel
eftf
or
Keny
abuthedi
dn’
ttel
lmewher
ein
Keny
aandwhy
.Godwhyam Imaki
ng
t
hismybusi
ness?Wher
ehei
swi
thwho
andwhyi
snoneofmybusi
ness!I
shoul
dgett
hist
hroughmyt
hickskul
l
.
Mydoorswi
ngsopenandmymom
wal
ksi
nwi
that
ray
.
“
Mor
ningbaby
”It
ossmyphoneaway
andsi
tonmybut
t.
“
Mor
ningmom”
“
Imadey
oubr
eakf
ast
”Ismi
l
eandt
ake
t
het
rayt
henpl
acei
tonmyt
highs
“
Thanky
ousomuch”Shesmi
l
esand
si
tsnex
ttome.Icanf
eel
heri
ntense
gaz
eonmeasIwi
pemyhandswi
tha
dampdi
shcl
oth.
“
Whati
sit
?”
“
Somet
hingi
sbot
her
ingy
ou”
“
Mydaught
erhav
ebeenmi
ssi
ngf
or
f
oury
ear
smom I
’
m mor
ethenbot
her
ed”
“
Iknowt
hatt
her
e’ssomet
hingel
se.You
ar
emydaught
erNonoandy
ouar
est
il
l
t
hesame”Isi
gh
“
Khuz
ani
didn’
tcal
lmey
est
erdaybuthe
pr
omi
sedt
ocal
lmeassoonasheget
t
oKeny
a.Hedi
dn’
tev
ent
ell
mewhatso
i
mpor
tantt
hathecoul
dn’
twai
tto
r
ecov
erf
ir
st.Hewasshotnotwi
thone
bul
l
etbut3mom!
”Shel
ooksatmewi
th
asmi
l
epl
ast
eredonherf
ace.Ir
eal
l
y
don’
tunder
standwhat
’smakesher
smi
l
eaboutwhatIj
ustsai
d.
“
Whyar
eyousmi
l
ingmom?Khuz
ani
has
gunshot
swoundst
hatneedst
imet
o
heal
buthe’
soutt
her
einaf
orei
gn
count
ry!
”
“
Youneedt
ocal
m down”
“
I’
m cal
m mom”
“
Noy
ouar
enoty
ouar
eshout
ingandI
under
standy
ourf
rust
rat
ionbutcal
m
downmybaby
”
“
I’
m sor
ryf
orshout
ingaty
oumom”
mom andIhav
ebeenwor
kingonour
r
elat
ionshi
p,wear
etaki
ngi
tdaybyday
.
“
Iunder
standy
ouar
einl
ove…”Icuther
shor
t
“
lov
ewher
edoest
hatcomef
rom now.I
wasj
ustv
oici
ngoutmyconcer
ns”she
chuckl
es
“
Icanseei
tiny
ourey
est
haty
oul
ove
hi
m Nonoev
enabl
i
ndper
soncansee
t
hatst
opdeny
ingi
t”
“
Hay
iIdon’
tlov
ehi
m Ihat
ehi
m”she
l
aughs
“
Ohr
eal
l
yist
hatwhyy
oucar
esomuch
t
hathe’
soutt
her
einf
orei
gncount
ywi
th
gunshot
swounds?I
sthatwhyy
ouar
e
f
rust
rat
edt
hathedi
dn’
ttel
lyouwhyhe
l
eftf
orKeny
a”shesmi
l
esIsi
ghand
cl
osemyey
esmoment
ari
l
y
“
HowcanIhav
efeel
i
ngsf
orhi
m mom?
Thi
smani
sther
easonwhyIshotmy
husband,
he’
sther
easonmydaught
er
i
smi
ssi
ng.Ican’
thav
efeel
i
ngsf
orhi
mI
r
efuse”
“
Wedon’
tchoosewhowef
all
inl
ove
wi
thandev
ery
thi
nghappensf
ora
r
eason.
”
“
Nomom al
lthesef
eel
i
ngsIf
eel
forhi
m
f
eel
ssowr
ongnj
e.If
eel
li
keI
’
m
bet
ray
ingmyl
atehusband.HowcanI
hav
efeel
i
ngsf
oramanwhowas
conspi
ri
ngagai
nstmyl
atehusband?
HowdoIev
enbegi
ntodev
elopf
eel
i
ngs
f
oramanwhi
l
emydaught
eri
smi
ssi
ng.
Ishoul
dbewor
ryi
ngaboutmydaught
er
nott
his”
“
Youar
ebei
nghar
dony
our
sel
fNono
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ouar
ehumant
ooandj
ustbecausey
ou
ar
egoi
ngt
hroughal
otdoesn’
tmean
y
ouar
eimmune.Khuz
ani
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i
kea
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l
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out
oldmet
hat
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thy
ou24/
7.I
t’
sshows
t
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eal
l
ycar
esabouty
ouandhe
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ermeantt
hingst
otur
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Het
oler
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ouri
nsul
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e
day
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ear
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opped
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nghowr
emor
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urnoutofev
ent
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lhewant
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osur
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hatI
’
m
condoni
ngwhathedi
d.Rev
engedoesn’
t
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oubet
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hent
heper
sonwho
wr
ongedy
ou.Ther
e’snoneedf
or
r
evengewej
ustneedt
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tandr
elax
Godwewi
l
lfi
ghtourbat
tl
es.
”Shet
akes
myhandsi
ntoher
s
“
Ther
e’snot
hingwr
ongwi
thmov
ingon
babyy
oual
sodeser
vesomeonewho
wi
l
lshowery
ouwi
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oveandt
reaty
ou
l
i
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ouar
eandI
’
m sur
ethat
y
ourl
atehusbandwon’
thol
ditagai
nst
y
ou”
“
Butnotwi
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thKhuz
ani
mamai
t’
s
f
eel
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keabet
ray
alt
omydaught
eras
wel
last
omyhusband”
“
Youneedt
oleti
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hear
t.Al
lthe
angerandhat
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ingi
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ory
ou.I
twi
l
lst
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ourwayof
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ness.Wedon’
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all
i
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ime
andt
hepl
acet
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l
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al
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chy
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s
comi
ng.I
t’
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’scomes
wi
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ning.Don’
tdenyy
our
sel
f
l
oveandhappi
nesssweet
hear
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giv
e
t
hemanhe’
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eal
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ylov
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ou.Thewayhel
ooksat
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ou”Ishakemyheadwi
tht
ear
s
st
reami
ngdownmyf
ace.
“
Leti
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,mov
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ear
s
“
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ougetsecondchancesi
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ett
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i
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sisy
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oveaf
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acei
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“
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arteat
ingmy
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Takey
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ove”
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ouar
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“
I’
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most50mom”
“
Doesl
ovehav
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cti
onnoso
pl
easedon’
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eme.Tel
lmewhenl
ast
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va
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“
It
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ri
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cohol
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orsel
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t
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“
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orsel
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sungenz
aisi
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e”(
youar
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nto
l
aught
er
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eleNono”(
youar
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Nono)
“
NoI
’
m not
!”
“
Whatdoy
oucal
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inks
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ery
day
?”
“
Wel
l
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hesame”
“
Khuz
ani
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cohol
i
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ouonceandf
oral
l
”
“
Maaa!
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aughsmx
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swoman!
“
Iwast
hinki
ngofgoi
ngbackhome
t
omor
row”
“
Oh”myhear
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opst
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omach
“
Don’
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l
lcomeback”
“
What
’st
her
ushmama?
”
“
Ican’
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ayher
efor
everNonoatsome
poi
ntIhav
etogobackhomeandy
our
f
atheri
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“
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ir
st”
“
Nonodon’
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ease”
“
Howi
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heot
her
wi
fe?
”
“
Eversi
ncey
ourf
athersatona
wheel
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rshechanged.
”
“
Whathappenedt
odad?
”
“
Wedon’
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opped
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ki
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hebl
ue”
“
Wowy
ouwer
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azt
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orr
evengeGodf
ightourbat
tl
es”
“
Real
l
yNono”
“
What
?Youwantmet
ofeel
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ryf
or
hi
m?I
’
m sor
rymom Iwon’
tit
’sser
ves
hi
mri
ght
.”
“
Youar
ehear
tl
essy
az”
“
Cal
lmewhat
everbutIdon’
tcar
eandI
wi
shy
oucoul
dst
opt
aki
ngcar
eofhi
m
andmakehi
mreal
i
zehowmuchofa
r
ubbi
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thouty
ou.
”
“
Hei
sst
il
lyourf
atherNono”
“
Hef
orgott
hatI
’
m hi
sdaught
erwhenhe
chasedmeoutofhi
shouse.Wel
lsi
nce
y
ouar
eleav
ingt
omor
rowl
etmehi
ta
showerwear
espendi
ngt
hewhol
eday
shoppi
ng”
“
Your
eal
l
ydon’
thav
eto.
.”
“
I’
m nott
aki
ngnoasananswer
”Igi
ve
hert
het
rayandj
umpoutofbedt
hen
headt
omybat
hroom.OnceI
’
m done
wi
thmyhy
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ocessIwal
kbackt
o
t
hebedr
oom.If
indmybedmadeand
smi
l
e.Il
ovehav
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eandI
wi
l
lreal
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ssherwhenshe’
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wi
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ormy
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enf
eel
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ryf
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ooksomet
hingt
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i
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enowt
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ndsomet
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o
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nceIhav
elostsomuchwei
ght
.I
f
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ownsol
i
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erbody
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hdr
essandbai
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compl
etet
hel
ookwi
thgol
daccessor
ies
onceI
’
m donewi
thmakeupIt
akemy
carkey
s,phone,
handbagandheadout
.
Mom i
sal
readywai
ti
ngf
ormei
nthe
l
i
vingr
oom.
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ulbaby
”
“
Thanky
oumom”Uponar
ri
val
west
art
att
hesal
onbutmom i
spr
otest
ing
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thmyheadwr
ap”
“
Ther
e’snot
hingwr
ongwi
thy
ourhead
wr
apmom buty
ourheadneedsome
f
reshai
rcomeon”
“
Hay
iIdon’
twantwav
esmi
naI
’
mfi
ne
wi
thmyheadwr
ap”Il
augh
“
It
’snotwav
esi
t’
sweav
es”
“
samedi
ff
erence”
“
Youwon’
tdoaweav
emom butl
ocks
andt
heywi
l
lst
ylei
tni
cel
y.
..
lookl
i
ke
t
his”Ishowherapi
ctur
e
“
Theywi
l
ldoi
twi
thmyhai
rnotwav
es
r
ight
?”Inodgi
ggl
i
ng
“
Okay
”
“
Don’
tdy
eherhai
r”Isayt
othe
hai
rdr
esserandshenods
“
Comemagr
iza”
“
Heydon’
tyoudar
ecal
lmemagr
iza
ungi
j
way
elakabi
!”Il
augh
“
Sor
ry”shamepoorhai
rdr
esser
.Isi
t
downandwai
tforherwhi
l
egoi
ng
t
hroughmyphone.St
il
lhehasn’
tcal
lme
Ineedadr
inksobadev
enasi
pwi
l
ldo.I
t
ell
mom I
’
m comi
ngbackandgot
othe
l
i
quorst
oreandbuyani
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odkaaf
ter
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othepar
kinga
l
ot.Igeti
nmycarandt
akef
ewsi
ps
t
henputi
tinmyhandbagandmakemy
wayback.Ihat
esi
tt
ingi
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aceand
donot
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eastt
heyhav
esome
magaz
inessoIdeci
det
oreadsome.At
l
ongl
astshe’
sdoneandl
ooki
ng
gor
geous.
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ulmommy
”she’
s
l
ooki
ngher
sel
fint
hemi
rr
orwi
thawi
de
smi
l
eandIcanseet
hatshe’
simpr
essed
“
Thanky
ousomuchbaby
”Ipayt
henwe
makeourwayt
osomebot
ique,
mom
needsomeser
iousmakeov
ershe’
sin
hermi
ddl
esi
xti
est
obewear
ing
“
amaphi
nif
a”andIt
hinkt
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er
wi
l
lmakemydadcr
azyandj
eal
ous.
Doi
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ngwi
thmom i
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shameoncewear
edonewi
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ng
wegot
her
est
aur
antf
orl
unch.
“
Hay
iangi
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ami
nay
ini
le
ebhal
wel
a”(
I’
mil
l
iter
atewhati
swr
it
ten
her
e)she’
sref
err
ingt
othemenut
he
wai
terex
plai
nswhat
’sont
hemenu
“
Sowhatdowantt
oeatol
dlady
”the
wai
terasks
“
Likhonai
phut
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mtanami
”(i
s
t
her
eanypor
ri
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t
hewai
ter
“
Unf
ort
unat
elynotol
dlady
”
“
Wuuuhay
ilendawoy
inhl
emahal
amos.
Nonomt
anami
uzongi
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aamasi
ngi
zov
ubaekhay
a”(
Thi
spl
acei
sa
wast
eofbeaut
y.Nonomychi
l
dyouwi
l
l
buymemaasIwi
l
leatathome)Il
augh
“
Buty
ouhav
etoeatsomet
hingmom”
“
Hay
iangi
funi
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aint
o
ez
ongi
phat
hisai
sisuphel
aumunt
u
uz
odl
anez
inkal
ankal
ala.I
ndawoenj
ani
enganal
oiphut
hunamasi
”(
Idon’
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t
oeatsomet
hingt
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l
lcause
st
omachache.Wemi
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absher
e
whatki
ndofar
est
aur
antt
hatdoesn’
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epor
ri
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he
wai
terst
if
li
ngal
augh
“
Youknowwhatsi
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est
eak,
wings
andgr
eensal
ad”
“
Whatwoul
dyouhav
efordr
inks?
”
“
Orangej
uice”Hescr
ibbl
esev
ery
thi
ng
downt
hendi
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s.Weengagei
na
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ersat
ionunt
ilt
hewai
terbr
ingsour
f
ood
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Ist
hiswhatwegoi
ngt
oeat
?”
“
Yeswhat
’swr
ongnow”
“
Hai
boNonoushoukut
hisodl
aisi
shebo
sodwanj
eimpel
a”Icanthel
pbutl
augh
“
Mom eatandst
opbei
ngi
mpossi
ble”
“
Hay
iukumoshal
okhu”(
thi
siswast
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shakemyheadweeatwhi
l
econt
inui
ng
wi
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ersat
iononcewear
edone
Ideci
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ingas
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pect
edMom i
sbei
ngi
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bleand
f
unnyatt
hesamet
ime.“
Aymi
na
angi
funi
njengi
l
okhungi
pot
ozwaabant
u
engi
ngabaz
i”Imustsayt
houghI
’
m
hav
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eatt
imewi
thher
.Ihearmy
phoner
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etr
iev
eit
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rom my
handbag.I
t’
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artwi
th
+254Ij
ustknewt
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shi
m
“
Khuz
ani
”.
“
Mommy
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ter
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yst
opbeat
ing
Idon’
twantbel
i
evewhatIheari
swhatI
t
hinki
tis
“
Mir
acl
eist
haty
ou?
”ther
e’ssi
l
ence
“
Baby
!St
handwasami
!Tal
ktome!
”I
saywi
that
remul
ousv
oice,
what
’s
goi
ngoncoul
dbet
hissomeki
ndofa
j
oke.
“
Khuz
ani
what
’sgoi
ngon?Ar
eyou
pl
ayi
ngt
ri
cksonme?
”Ican’
thel
pbut
cr
ycoul
dthi
sbemybabygi
rl
?
“
HeyBonga,
I’
m sor
ryt
hatIdi
dn’
ttel
l
y
ouwhyIwasl
eav
ingf
orKeny
a
becauseIdi
dn’
twantt
ogi
vey
ouhi
gh
hopesbutI
’
m wi
thMi
raher
e,she
doesn’
tbel
i
evey
ouar
eal
i
ve,
shet
hinks
y
ouar
edead”Ij
umpupwi
thshock
“
Khuz
ani
don’
tpl
ayl
i
ket
hatpl
ease”
“
IfoundherBonga!If
oundourMi
racl
e!”
Theex
cit
ementi
nhi
svoi
cei
sal
lI
neededt
obel
i
evehi
m
“
Giv
ehert
hephonel
etmet
alkt
oher
”
“
Mommyy
ou.
..
you.
.ar
e..al
i
..v
e?”Iwoul
d
nev
ermi
stakemydaught
er’
svoi
ceev
en
whenshe’
schoki
ngonhert
ear
s.
“
Yesbabyy
esmommyi
sal
i
vepl
ease
comebackhome!Comebackhome
sweet
hear
tIl
ovey
ou”
“
Nononoi
t’
sapr
ank,
it’
sapr
ank,
it’
sa
pr
ank,
it’
sapr
ankSt
arwhat
’sgoi
ngon?
Mom i
sdeadr
ight
?ThePIsai
dshe’
s
dead,
she’
sdead,
ufi
l
e,uf
il
e”myhear
t
br
eaksi
ntopi
ecesIcanheart
hatshe’
s
l
osi
ngbr
eat
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dcomi
ngout
ofhermout
h.Ohumt
anami
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all
t
hist
imeshet
houghtI
’
m dead
“
it
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ankMi
ra!I
t’
smebaby
”I
hearsomeshuf
fl
ing
“
Baby
!Mi
ra!
”NoI
’
m notl
osi
ngheragai
n
sheneedt
obel
i
eveme!
“
Mir
a!”Iscr
eam myl
ungsoutI
’
m sur
e
t
heyt
hinkI
’
m cr
azy
“
Hey
…”
“
Khuz
ani
uphi
umt
anami
”
“
Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
ate”
“
Iwantt
otal
ktohershehast
obel
i
eve
menoi
nfactIwantt
ocomet
her
e
now!
”
“
Mir
ajustf
aint
edBongaIwi
l
lcal
lyou
whenshe’
sawakeokayf
ornowIneed
y
out
ocal
m downpl
ease”
“
Okay
”hehangsupandmom i
slooki
ng
atmei
nant
ici
pat
ion
“
What
’sgoi
ngon”
Iex
plai
nwhat
shappeni
ngbet
weensobs,
“
Ohbabyunkul
unkul
umkhul
u”shepul
l
s
mei
nherar
msandcomf
ort
sme.I
’
min
nost
ateofdr
ivi
ngr
ightnowI
’
m so
anx
ious.Ical
lZoandex
plai
nthe
si
tuat
ion
“
OhmyGodBongar
eal
l
y?”
“
YesbutIwi
l
lbel
i
evei
twhenIseemy
daught
er”
“
Im comi
ngr
ightnow”
“
Thanky
ou”Ihangup.Zoar
ri
vehal
fan
hourl
ateraf
terpl
easant
ri
eshav
ebeen
shar
edshedr
ivesushome.Thewai
tis
ki
l
li
ngme,
inf
acti
t’
ski
l
li
ngal
lofus.We
ar
eathomei
nthel
i
vingr
oom wai
ti
ng
f
orKhuz
ani
’
scal
l
.Mom i
str
yingt
o
makeaconv
ersat
ionbutwear
etoo
anx
ious.
“
Godwhyi
shenotcal
l
ingnow!
”Igr
oan
“
Bepat
ientNono”
“
Iwi
l
lmakeussomet
ea”
“
Ihav
emyv
odkaI
..
”
“
Hai
sukamaanBongav
odka
y
amasi
mba!Gomakeust
earZol
eka”I
huf
f.Mi
nut
esl
ateZocomesbackwi
th
ourt
ea.It
ryt
odr
inki
tbuti
t’
sdoesn’
t
wantt
ogodown.It
hinkI
’
mlosi
ngmy
mi
nd.If
indmy
sel
fpaci
ngupanddown
“
Youneedt
ocal
m downBongaand
r
elax
”Zosay
s
“
Notunt
ilIhearwhat
’sgoi
ngon”
“
Sitdowny
ouar
emaki
ngmedi
zzy
”
Mom say
sIsi
tdownaf
terwhatf
eel
s
l
i
kef
orev
erhecal
l
sback
“
Khuz
ani
”
“
She’
sawakenowshest
il
lcan’
tbel
i
eve
i
tbutsheagr
eedt
ocomewi
thme.The
coupl
ethat
’sf
oundheri
scomi
ngas
wel
lIwi
l
lex
plai
nev
ery
thi
ngwhenwe
gett
her
e”i
t’
smakesmef
eel
bet
tert
hat
atl
eastshehadacoupl
ewi
thherIhope
t
heywer
etr
eat
ingherwel
l
“
Oht
hanky
ousomuchIcan’
twai
tfor
y
out
ocomebackhowi
sshet
hough?
”
“
She’
sfi
neandgr
owny
ouwi
l
lseeher
whenwegett
her
eIhav
etogo”
“
Okay
”Ihangupwi
thasmi
l
eonmyf
ace
“
Theyar
ecomi
ngbackhomet
oday
appar
ent
lyshewasf
oundbyacoupl
e.
Wegoi
ngt
ohearmor
ewhent
heycome
her
e”Theybot
hbeamswi
thex
cit
ement
.
Wedeci
det
ocookandpr
epar
ethe
guestr
ooms.Thegoodt
hingi
sthatt
hey
ar
efl
yi
ngwi
thaj
et.Hour
skeepgoi
ngby
t
hewai
tiski
l
li
ngme.Iwantadr
inkbutI
wantmydaught
ert
ofi
ndmysober
.Zo
di
dn’
tgohomebutshecal
l
edher
husbandandi
nfor
medhi
m.I
t’
sar
ound
10pm andI
’
m st
art
ingt
ogi
veupr
ight
t
henwehearabuz
zerandal
lj
umpf
or
t
hedoorI
fthesi
tuat
ional
l
owsmeI
woul
dlaughsohar
d.Iopent
hegat
eas
wel
last
hedoorf
ort
hem.ThemomentI
seeherwal
ki
ngi
nwi
thadog Ihal
frun
t
oher
“
Mir
acl
e!”
“
Mommy
!”Isqueez
eheri
nmyar
msand
webot
hcr
y.
“
OhmybabyI
’
m sor
ry”
“
I’
m sosor
rymommy
”Theat
mospher
e
i
semot
ional
andweal
lshedt
ear
s.Iwas
st
art
ingt
ogi
veupt
hatt
hisdaywoul
d
come.Ipul
lherbackandl
ookatheri
t’
s
r
eal
l
yher
,shehasgr
ownsomuchbut
she’
slostsomuchwei
ght
.Ihol
dher
agai
n
“
Mommyi
t’
sreal
l
yyou”
“
Yesbabyi
t’
sme”
“
Ithoughty
oudi
edmommy
,Ihear
da
gunshotandI
…”shecr
iesbr
eaki
ngmy
hear
tint
opi
eces.Icani
magi
net
hepai
n
shehasbeent
hrough.
Zowr
apsher
ar
msar
oundusandcr
ywi
thus
“
Lor
dyouar
egr
eatIknewy
ouwi
l
lnev
er
f
orsakeus…”shest
art
spr
ayi
ngandI
knowwhenZost
art
spr
ayi
ngshewon’
t
st
opbutt
odayIdon’
tmi
nd.He’
sreal
l
y
wor
thyt
obepr
aised.Mom j
oinsherand
whent
heyf
ini
shweex
changegr
eet
ings
t
henwewal
ktol
i
vingr
oom.
“
Bonga,
Mama,
Zot
hisi
sMrandMr
s
Mwangi
.”Il
ookatt
hecoupl
e,t
heyl
ook
l
i
ket
heyar
eint
hei
rear
lyf
ort
iesi
fnot
l
atet
hir
ti
es
“
I’
m BongaMi
ra’
sMom.Ihav
ebeen
l
ooki
ngf
orherf
or4y
ear
s.I
t’
shasbeen
av
erypai
nful
4year
sofmyl
i
fe.Inev
er
t
houghtIwi
l
lseemydaught
eragai
n.”
“
Wear
ehonor
edt
omeett
hewoman
t
hatgav
ebi
rt
htoabeaut
if
ulgi
rlas
Muuj
i
za.
”Heex
plai
nsev
ery
thi
ngt
hat
happenedandIcan’
tst
opmyt
ear
sandI
canseet
hathe’
ssi
ncer
ebutt
he
quest
ioni
swhoi
sthePIandwhywoul
d
hel
i
eaboutsuch.
“
I’
m sor
ryf
ort
hepai
nyouwentt
hrough
hadweknowt
haty
ouar
eal
i
veandt
he
PIwasf
ool
i
nguswewoul
dhav
e
br
oughther
.Muuj
i
zai
sli
keourdaught
er
t
ousandsheal
soknowst
hatshe
meanssomucht
ous.Wel
oveherso
muchIswearwedi
dn’
tknowwewer
e
pl
ayedbyourPI
.Wet
rust
edhi
m andwe
nev
ert
houghthecoul
dli
etous.I
’
m
r
eal
l
ysor
ry”MrMwangi
say
swhi
l
e
comf
ort
inghi
swi
fewhoi
scr
ying.
“
Ican’
tbegi
ntoi
magi
net
hepai
nyou
wentt
hroughsi
s..Wewoul
ddoany
thi
ng
t
opr
ovet
hatwear
einnocenti
nal
lthi
s.
Justl
i
kemyhusbandsai
dwedi
dn’
t
knowSkhumbuz
ocoul
dli
etousl
i
ke
t
hat
.He’
smycousi
n’
ssonandwe
t
rust
edhi
m.He’
stheonet
hathel
pedus
t
ochangeMuuj
i
zai
dent
it
yand
ev
ery
thi
ng.
”
“
Iheary
ouMrandMr
sMwangi
butwhy
woul
dthePIl
i
e?”Iask
“
Thatwhatweal
sowantt
ohear
.Ihav
e
beent
ryi
ngt
ocal
lhi
m butIcan’
tget
hol
dofhi
m.”
“
Yousai
dthePIi
sSkhumbuz
o?
Skhumbuz
owho?Wher
edoeshel
i
ve?
”
“
Skhumbuz
oMnt
ambo”Ichuckl
eand
shakemyhead
“
Skhumbuoz
oMnt
ambo?
”
“
Yesdoknowhi
m?”Khuz
ani
asks
cur
iousl
y
“
Ofcour
seI
t’
sSpi
der
!”
“
Thatsonofabi
tch!
”
“
Whywoul
dmal
umeSpi
derdot
his
mom”Mi
raaskswi
thapai
nedv
oice
“
BecauseIshotKhumal
obaby
.Al
lthi
s
wasar
evenget
ohi
m.Nowi
t’
smake
sense”
”
Howdoy
ouknowhi
m andwhywoul
d
hedosomet
hingcr
uel
li
ket
his”Mr
s
Mwangi
asks
“
Hewaswor
kingwi
thmyl
atehusband.
I
nfactt
her
ewer
eli
kebr
other
s.Spi
der
wasKhumal
o’sgot
oguy
.He’
sver
y
goodatwhathedoes”
“
Sohemadeusaf
ool
forhi
s
v
engeance!
”Shout
sMrMwangi
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
his.
.Skhumbuz
ois
cr
uel
!”Say
sMr
sMwangi
.NowIwonder
t
hatMi
rai
sfoundwhatwi
l
lhappen.I
t
hankt
hem f
ort
aki
ngcar
eofmy
daught
erandcomi
ngaf
tert
heyf
ound
outt
het
rut
h.Thyseem l
i
kegoodpeopl
e
andIbel
i
evet
hatt
heyhav
ebeent
aki
ng
goodcar
eofmydaught
er.Igetupand
makemywayt
otheki
tchent
omake
t
ea.If
eel
someone’
spr
esenceasI
’
m
busypr
epar
ingt
hei
rteaIt
urnandl
ook
athi
m wi
thasmi
l
eonmyf
ace.
“
Thanky
ousomuchKhuz
ani
Idon’
t
knowwhatt
osay
.Ifi
twasn’
tfory
ouI
doubtIwoul
dhav
efoundmydaught
er”
Tear
srol
ldownmyf
acebuthecat
ches
t
hem wi
thhi
sthumbbef
oret
heyf
all
.
“
Itol
dyouIwi
l
lfi
ndher
”
“
Andy
oudi
dyouar
emyher
o.I
t’
sfeel
l
i
keadr
eam.Thanky
ou,
thanky
ou,
t
hanky
ousomuch”Tot
ell
youI
’
m
happywoul
dbeanunder
stat
ement
.I
st
andonmyt
oest
oreachhi
sli
psand
ki
sshi
m.Whatar
eyoudoi
ngBonga!
?I
chast
isemy
sel
fandpul
lbackgr
ibbed
wi
thembar
rassment
“
Uhm I
..I
’
m sor
ryI
’
mjustov
erex
cit
ed
andI
…”Heshutmeupbycapt
uri
ngmy
l
i
psi
ntohi
sandhol
dsmecl
osert
o
hi
msel
fbymywai
stwi
thhi
sonear
m as
t
heot
herhasast
ri
ng.Theki
ssi
ssl
owl
y
andsensual
myhandsaut
omat
ical
l
y
f
indhi
sfaceandf
ramesi
t,ourt
ounges
ar
edanci
ngt
othet
uneofi
ntenseand
deepemot
ions.
“
BongaI
..
.ohum I
’
m sor
ry”Zosay
swe
br
eakt
heki
ss,
Ihi
demyf
aceonhi
s
chestashechuckl
es.
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdaySmangel
e
Thandol
wenkosi
Dladl
aNkal
a&
HappyBi
rt
hdayLondekaNt
shay
int
shay
i

CHAPTER39

Li
fei
sful
lofsur
pri
ses,
nev
eri
nmy
wi
l
destdr
eamswoul
dIhav
ethought
t
hatmymom woul
ddef
endher
sel
f
agai
nstKhumal
o,t
othepoi
ntofev
en
ki
l
li
nghi
m.Iwi
tnessedherbei
ngabused
byhi
mfort
woy
ear
sandnev
erev
en
oncehadshef
oughtback.Iwassosur
e
t
hatheki
l
ledhernott
heot
herway
ar
ound.I
’
m st
unnedbyt
het
urnof
ev
ent
s,Iguesssher
eachedt
hebr
eaki
ng
poi
ntbutI
’
m sopr
oudofher
.Ican
i
magi
nehowt
raumat
ici
tmusthav
e
beenf
orherandIknowhowmuchshe
l
ovedKhumal
o,t
hismusthav
ebeen
v
eryhar
dforher
.Ican’
tbel
i
evet
hatI
hav
ebeensi
nki
ngi
ndepr
essi
on,
bl
ami
ngmy
sel
fforherdeat
hwhenshe’
s
act
ual
l
yal
i
ve.Howcanahumanbei
ng
beasev
ilasSpi
der
?Nodaypassedby
wi
thoutmecr
uci
fyi
ngmy
sel
fforwhatI
di
d.Keepi
ngmeawayf
rom mymot
her
andmaki
ngmebel
i
eveshe’
sdeadwon’
t
br
ingKhumal
oback.Ican’
thel
pbutf
eel
abi
thur
tthought
hathe’
sdead.Hewas
agoodmanwhenhewant
edt
o,Ican’
t
di
smi
sst
hat
.

“
Ican’
tbel
i
evey
ouar
eher
ebaby
,I
mi
ssedy
ousomuch”
“
Imi
ssedy
ouev
erysi
ngl
edaymommy
”
Ev
ery
onehadl
eftnowi
ncl
udi
ngmy
adopt
ivepar
ent
s.Mom t
houghtt
heywi
l
l
spendani
ghther
e,shedi
dn’
tknowt
hat
mom’
spar
ent
sli
veher
einDur
bs.Bef
ore
wedr
oveher
ewehadt
odr
opSt
arand
Kamar
iat
her
efi
rst
.I’
m pr
essedagai
nst
mymom’
schestandshehasherar
ms
ar
oundmybody
.Lor
dknowshowmuch
Ihav
emi
ssedherembr
ace.Ev
ery
thi
ng
f
eel
ssor
ightandIdon’
twantt
oletgo.I
f
eel
li
keal
loft
hiswoul
dbeadr
eam i
f
shel
et’
sgoofme.Ii
nhal
etaki
ngal
lher
peonyandmandar
inor
angescenti
nmy
nost
ri
ls
“
Nonoy
oudi
dn’
tint
roduceme”say
sthe
womansi
tt
ingnex
ttome.I
’
mint
he
mi
ddl
e,mom andshear
esi
tt
ingoneach
ofmysi
des.
“
OhI
’
m sosor
rymom.Babyt
hisi
smy
mot
hery
ourgr
andmot
her
.”
“
Hel
l
onunuz
akagogo”
“
Hi”Isaycol
dly
“
Giv
egogoahug”Ipul
lbackf
rom
mamaandhugher
“
Ihav
ehear
dal
otabouty
ou,
I’
m so
happyt
ofi
nal
l
ymeety
ou”Shepl
ant
sa
peckonmyl
i
ps,
itt
akessomuchofme
nott
owi
pemymout
h.
“
Unf
ort
unat
elyIcan’
tsayt
hesame
abouty
ou”Imumbl
e
“
Whatdi
dyousay
?”Gogoasks
“
Not
hing.I
’
mti
red,
Iwantt
osl
eep”
“
Don’
tyouwantsomet
hingt
oeat
?”
mom say
s
“
Nomom,
I’
mfi
ne”
“
Iwi
l
lmakey
ourf
avour
it
epeanutbut
ter
andbut
tersandwi
ch”Ismi
l
efai
ntl
y
“
It
’snol
ongermyf
avour
it
enow”
“
Oh,
whati
syourf
avour
it
enow?
”
“
Idon’
tknowmom”
“
Whatdoy
oumeanbaby
”Isi
gh
“
Idon’
tknowwhatmyf
avour
it
eis
any
mor
e.Ihav
elosti
nter
estont
he
t
hingsIuset
oli
ke.
”
“
It
’sunder
standabl
e,y
ouhav
ebeen
t
hroughal
otbaby
.Youwi
l
lbemy
Mi
racl
ethaty
ouuset
obeev
ent
ual
l
y.”
“
Idoubtmamaal
othashappenedand
mostoft
hoset
hingswer
en’
tpl
easant
t
heyl
eftmeempt
yanddeadi
nthe
i
nsi
de.
”
“
Ohsweet
hear
tI’
m sor
ry,
butI
’
m her
e
nowandI
’
m nev
erl
ett
ingy
oul
eav
emy
si
ghtagai
n.Wear
egoi
ngt
ogett
hrough
t
hist
oget
herokay
?”Inodwi
thmyhead
“
Don’
tcr
y,Il
ovey
ousomuch”shepul
l
s
met
oherar
msaf
terwi
pingmyt
ear
s.I
coul
dst
ayi
nherar
msf
orev
er.OnceI
’
m
cal
m wer
eti
ret
osl
eep.Ofcour
seI
’
m
sl
eepi
ngwi
thheri
nmybedr
oom and
she’
shol
dingmet
ighti
nherar
msl
i
keI
woul
drunaway
.
“
Mommy
”
“
Yesbaby
”
“
Howar
eyou?
”
“
I’
m happyt
hatwef
oundy
ou”
“
Imeanhowar
eyouhol
dingup,
aft
er
y
oushotKhumal
o”shebr
eat
hsout
l
oudl
y
“
I’
mlear
ningt
oli
vewi
thi
t,t
her
e’s
not
hingIcandoex
pectt
hat
.”
“
I’
m sor
ryy
ouhadt
ogot
hroughal
lof
t
hatbecauseofme.HadInot
…”
“
Heyst
opi
tyoudi
dwhatanychi
l
d
woul
dhav
edonebaby
.Youwant
edt
o
pr
otectme,
Iunder
standMi
raandI
’
m so
sor
ryf
orcal
l
ingy
oust
upi
dbl
i
ndgi
rl
.I
wasangr
yandt
hosewor
dscameout
wr
ongpl
easef
orgi
vememychi
l
d”
“
Youwer
eri
ghtdon’
tapol
ogi
ze”
“
Hay
iMi
ray
ouar
enotst
upi
d,pl
ease
er
aset
hatf
rom y
ourmi
nd.Youdi
dn’
t
knowwhatLwandl
e’
sint
ent
ionswer
e,
don’
tcr
uci
fyy
our
sel
f.Ev
ery
thi
ngt
hat
happensi
nli
fehav
elessons,
wej
ust
needt
olear
nfr
om t
hosel
essons.I
t’
s
wassowr
ongofmet
ocal
lyouabl
i
nd
st
upi
dgi
rl
.Myangerdoesn’
tjust
if
y
any
thi
ng.Iapol
ogi
zef
rom t
hedeepest
ofmyhear
tbaby
,Iwantust
ost
artov
er
andmov
eonf
rom ev
ery
thi
ngt
hat
happened.St
opbl
ami
ngy
our
sel
f,what
happened,
happenedandt
her
e’snot
hing
wecandoabouti
t.Let
’smov
eonwi
th
l
i
fe,
canwepl
ease”Inodast
ear
smake
t
hei
rwayont
hesi
deofmyf
ace.
“
Ilov
eyoumyMi
racl
e”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomama”
If
eel
herf
inger
ti
psr
unni
ngt
hroughmy
hai
rohi
t’
sfeel
sgood,
it’
sdoesn’
ttakes
t
imef
ormet
ofal
lasl
eep.Thenex
t
mor
ningI
’
m wokenupbyt
heur
get
opee
butmom hasherar
mswr
appedar
ound
met
ight
ly.It
ryt
oremov
eherar
ms
ar
oundmebutshehol
dmet
ight
ly
“
Mom Iwantt
opee”
“
I’
m sor
rybaby
,it
’sj
ustt
hat
…”shepause
andsi
ghs
“
Go”Isl
i
deoutofbedandcal
loutf
or
Rocky
.Heal
way
ssl
eepswi
thmebuton
hi
sbl
uecomf
ort
abl
ebed.Ihadt
obr
ing
i
tofcour
se.Icr
ouchandhol
dhi
minmy
ar
ms
“
Mor
ningbi
gboy
”Hel
i
cksmyf
aceand
bar
ksal
i
ttl
e.Igetupandhol
dhi
s
har
nessbef
oremaki
ngmywayt
omy
bat
hroom.Idonumberoneandwash
myhandst
henmakemywaybackt
o
t
hebedr
oom.
“
Ili
ket
hebondy
out
wohav
e”
“
Ili
kehi
mtoo”Isi
tdownont
hebednex
t
t
omom
“
Wher
e’smuf
fi
n?”
“
Ilosther
”
“
I’
m sor
rybutIt
hinkIl
oveRockymor
e,
he’
scut
e”Ismi
l
e
“
Howdi
dyousl
eep”Iask
“
Isl
eptwel
lmychi
l
dandy
our
sel
f?”
“
Met
oo”
“
Youradopt
ivepar
ent
s,wer
ethey
t
reat
ingy
ougood?
”
“
Yesmom t
heyar
egoodpeopl
e,t
hey
t
reat
edmel
i
keI
’
mthei
rown.
”
“
Don’
ttheyhav
echi
l
drenoft
hei
rown?
”
“
Not
heydon’
t,
mom can’
thav
echi
l
dren”
“
Shamepoorwoman,
Ican’
tbegi
nto
i
magi
net
hepai
nshe’
sgoi
ngt
hrough”
“
She’
sreal
l
yagoodmot
her
,Iwi
shGod
cangi
veherachi
l
dofherownoneday
.”
“
Icant
ell
theyhav
ebeent
reat
ingy
ou
goodmybabyandIowet
hem so
much.
”
“
Iowet
hem myl
i
fet
oo”
“
Letmemaket
hisbedt
henwehi
ta
showert
oget
her
”Sheget
sonwi
thwhat
shesai
dthenwehi
tashowert
oget
her
.
Oncewear
edonewi
thhy
gienepr
ocess
andget
ti
ngdr
essed,
wemakeourway
t
otheki
tchent
omakebr
eakf
astbuti
t’
s
seem l
i
keGogoi
sal
readybusywi
thi
t.
“
Mor
ningbant
wanabami
”(mor
ningmy
chi
l
dren)
“
Mor
ningmom”mom r
epl
i
es
“
Howdi
dyout
wosl
eep?
”
“
Wesl
eptwel
l
,you?
”
”
Ial
sosl
eptwel
l
,br
eakf
astwi
l
lber
eady
i
nasecond”
“
Thanky
oumom,
whatt
imear
eyou
l
eav
ing?
”
“
Ijustmetmygr
anddaught
er,
Ideci
ded
t
ospendonemor
eweek”
“
Real
l
y?”mom say
swi
thex
cit
ement
l
acedi
nherv
oice
“
Yesbaby
”
“
Thanky
oumom t
hat
’smeanssomuch
t
ome”Idon’
tli
ket
hiswomanandIcan’
t
ev
enpr
etend.Onceshe’
sdone
pr
epar
ingbr
eakf
astwesi
tont
hedi
ning
ar
eaandmom di
shesupf
ormet
hen
gi
vesmemyf
ood
“
Thanky
ou”Ieatwhi
l
eli
steni
ngt
omom
andhermom t
alki
ng.Theyseem t
oget
al
ongv
erywel
lwhi
l
eIont
heot
hersi
de
I
’
m angr
yatherf
orchasi
ngmymom out
oft
hei
rhousej
ustbecauseshewas
pr
egnantwi
thme.
“
Youar
esoqui
etbaby
,ar
eyouokay
”
mom asks
“
Yesmom I
’
mfi
ne”af
terbr
eakf
astIgo
t
omybedr
oom andt
akemypi
l
lsf
rom
mybagt
hengot
otheki
tchen.Ipour
my
sel
fagl
assofwat
eranddownt
hem.
“
Whatar
ethosepi
l
lsf
orbaby
,ar
eyou
si
ck”Ican’
tmi
sst
heconcer
nandwor
ry
i
nherv
oice
“
It
’sant
idepr
essant
s”
“
Ohar
etheyhel
pingt
hough”
“
Honest
lyIdon’
tknowmom because
ot
herday
sIf
eel
wor
seandt
hesi
de
ef
fect
sar
enothel
ping”
“
Howbadar
ethesi
deef
fect
s?”
“
Ver
ybadbutt
hedoct
orsai
dthesi
de
ef
fect
sar
enor
mal
.Iwantt
ost
opt
aki
ng
t
hem mom.Ihat
ethatmyl
i
fehas
somehowdependedonsomepi
l
ls.Ij
ust
wantt
hingst
obet
hewayt
heyusedt
o
be,
youknow?I
’
mti
redoft
hispai
nmom
Ij
ustwantt
obey
oungandhappyagai
n”
“
Ohmybaby
,youwi
l
lbeal
ri
ght
.I’
m her
e
nowandIwi
l
lmakesur
ethaty
ou
r
ecov
erf
rom t
hispai
n.Wehav
etogot
o
t
hedoct
ort
ofi
ndouti
fit
’sokf
ory
out
o
st
opt
aki
ngt
hem”
“
Please,
Iwi
l
lcommi
tmy
sel
ftot
her
apy
”
“
Ohbaby
,comehomeher
e”Shepul
l
s
mei
nherar
msandhugsme.
“
Fil
lmei
nwhathasbeenhappeni
ng
her
efort
hepasty
ear
sbecauseIcan
seet
hatal
othappened,
nabanoJudi
th
bagcwel
eindl
u”
“
She’
sGogot
oyouMi
ra”
“
Isi
tokayf
ormet
osayIdon’
tli
keher
,
t
hatIdi
sli
keherf
ory
ou?
”
“
Babywet
alkedandsheapol
ogi
zed”
“
Ify
ousayso”
“
Iwanty
out
ogi
veherachancepl
ease
sweet
hear
t.Wear
ewor
kingonour
r
elat
ionshi
p”
“
What
…”abuz
zerdi
stur
bsme.
“
Iwi
l
lgeti
t”mom say
sandgot
oat
tend
whoev
eri
svi
sit
ing.Hi
sscentf
il
lsmy
nost
ri
ls,
myhear
tski
psabeat
“
Saw’
bonaMa”hi
svoi
cest
il
lmakesmy
t
ummyf
lut
ter
“
Hel
l
oboycomei
n”
“
Mir
a!”
“
‘MyDol
l
face!
”SnoandLwandl
escr
eam
att
hesamet
ime.Hescoopsmeupand
t
wir
lwi
thmecausi
ngmet
ogi
ggl
e.Oh
howmuchIhav
emi
ssedhi
m.
“
PutherdownLwandl
e,Iwantt
ohug
hert
oo!
”Snosay
sandwel
augh.Heput
medowngi
vi
ngmeachancet
ohugSno.
GoshImi
ssedhert
oo
“
WhyMi
ra,
whydi
dyoul
eav
emehuh?
Don’
tyoul
ovemeany
mor
e?”She’
s
cr
yingandIcan’
thel
pbutf
eel
hor
ri
ble
“
Ofcour
seIl
ovey
oumunchki
n,i
twas
nev
ermyi
ntent
iont
oleav
eyou.I
t
houghtmyl
i
fewasi
ndanger
,Ihadt
o
sav
emy
sel
f.I
’
m sor
ryt
haty
ouhadt
ogo
t
hroughal
loft
his.Pl
easedon’
tcr
y,I
’
m
backandI
’
m nev
erl
eav
ingy
ou”Ipul
lher
backandwi
pehert
ear
s.
“
Youhav
egr
ownbuty
ouar
esot
hin,
wer
eyounoteat
ingwher
eyouwer
e”I
chuckl
e
“
Iwaseat
ing,
howi
sschool
?”
“
School
isschool
.Imi
ssedy
ousomuch
y
az.Lwandl
ehasanewgi
rl
fr
iend.Idon’
t
l
i
keher
,shehasf
atcheeksandshe’
s
ugl
y”Thatf
eel
sli
keast
abi
nmyhear
t
butIf
ull
yunder
stand.I
t’
sbeen4y
ear
s
andt
hingsbet
weent
het
woofus
wer
en’
twel
l
.
“
YekaukuphaphaSnot
hando,
whogav
e
y
out
her
ightt
otel
lDol
l
facet
hathuh!
”
“
Ouchy
ouar
ehur
ti
ngmeLwandl
e”
“
Uyaphaphawenanx
!”IhearSno
bur
sti
ngi
ntoal
oudsob
“
Lwenkosi
whathav
eyoudonet
oher
now”
“
Hepi
nchedme”Snor
epl
i
es
“
Whyi
sSnocr
ying?
”Mom asks
“
It
sLwenkosi
mom,
hepi
nchedher
”
“
YewenaLwandl
engi
zokukhahl
ela
uncwet
shwaubani
wenanx
!Comeher
e
Sno”Iheart
hem wal
ki
ngaway
.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evei
t’
syouIt
houghtIwi
l
l
nev
erseey
ouDol
l
face.Whydi
dn’
tyou
cal
lmehuh?
”
“
Idi
dn’
twantt
ori
skmyl
i
feaswel
las
y
our
sLwenkosi
”
“
Youdi
dn’
tthi
nkaboutust
houghMi
ra,
wespenty
ear
scr
yingf
ory
ouhopi
ng
t
haty
ouwi
l
lbef
oundbuty
ouwer
e
nev
erf
ound.
”Hi
svoi
cei
sbr
eaki
ng,
I
knowt
hathe’
sonav
ergeofcr
ying
“
I’
m sor
ryf
ordi
sappear
ingl
i
ket
hatbutI
hadnochoi
ce”Isayast
ear
sst
ream
downmyf
ace.Hewi
pest
hem,
runni
ng
hi
sfi
nger
sonmyf
aceasi
fhe’
str
yingt
o
makesur
eifi
t’
sreal
l
yme.
“
Imi
ssedy
ousomuch”hesay
swi
tha
cr
yingv
oice
“
Imi
ssedy
ouev
erysi
ngl
esecond”He
hol
dsmei
nhi
sar
msandwebot
hcr
y
t
oget
her
.Hepul
l
sbackawhi
l
elat
erand
pl
ant
sapeckonmyf
orehead.
“
GodIcan’
tbel
i
evei
t’
syou”
“
Bet
terbel
i
eve”
“
MyDol
l
face”
“
Mycuddl
ecakes”Hel
eanshi
s
f
oreheadonmi
neandwest
ayi
nthat
posi
ti
onf
orawhi
l
ejustl
i
steni
ngt
oour
hear
tsbeat
.It
’snol
i
ethatIl
ovehi
m so
muchandi
fchancewasgi
vent
ofi
xour
r
elat
ionshi
pI’
dtakei
twi
thoutadoubt
butnowhehassomeonei
nhi
sli
fe.Ipul
l
backandwi
pemyt
ear
s
“
I’
m sor
ryMi
raf
orev
ery
thi
ngIdi
dtoy
ou,
I
..
”
“
It
’sokayLwenkosi
,wedon’
thav
etogo
t
hroughi
tal
lov
eragai
n.”
“
ButIwantt
oapol
ogi
zeMi
ra,
Ihav
e
causedy
ousomuchpai
nandIhat
e
my
sel
ffort
hatpl
easef
orgi
veme”
“
LikeIsai
d,wedon’
thav
etot
alkabouti
t.
I
’
m al
sosor
ryIwashur
ti
ngandmom
wasangr
yatme,
Ineededsomeone
mal
umeSoxhappenedt
obet
her
e.One
t
hingl
edt
oanot
herIknowt
hat
’snot
j
ust
if
iabl
ebuti
t’
sthet
rut
h.”
“
Ifor
gav
eyoul
ongt
imeagoal
lIwant
ed
wast
ohol
dyoui
nmyar
ms.I
’
m so
happyy
ouar
eal
i
veIt
houghty
ou…y
ou
di
ed”Hecupsmyf
aceandbr
usheshi
s
l
i
psonmi
neI
’
mtempt
edt
oki
sshi
mjust
t
ogett
hef
eel
ofhi
sli
psonmi
neaf
ter
al
lthi
syear
s.
“
Arey
ousupposedt
obedoi
ngt
hat
whi
l
eyouhav
eagi
rl
fr
iend”Hegr
oans
andpl
ant
sapeckonmyl
i
ps
“
Ican’
tresi
sty
ou,
Imi
ssedy
ouso
much”
“
Buti
t’
sunf
aironher
”
“
Iknowt
rustme,
Iknow”
“
Youl
oveher
?”
“
YesIdo”myhear
tshat
ter
sint
oteensy
pi
eces
“
I’
m sohappyf
ory
ou,
Iwi
shy
ouguy
sal
l
t
hebest
”If
akeasmi
l
etr
yingt
omask
mypai
n.
“
I’
m sor
ryMi
ra,
IthoughtIwi
l
lnev
ersee
y
ouagai
n.Iwai
tedf
ory
ouIr
eal
l
ydi
d…”
“
Don’
tfeel
bad,
4year
sit
’sal
ongt
ime.I
under
standr
eal
l
y”Ibl
i
nkbackmyt
ear
s
“
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ngt
oseeme,
Ireal
l
y
appr
eci
atei
t.Mom andIar
egoi
ng
somewher
e”Il
i
eofcour
seIcan’
tst
and
hi
spr
esenceknowi
ngt
hathecannev
er
bemi
neagai
n.
“
It
’swasni
cet
oseey
oumyDol
l
face.I
wi
l
lcomebackl
atert
oseey
ou”
“
Youdon’
thav
etor
eal
l
y”
“
ButIwantt
o”Isi
ghandnodwi
thmy
head.Themomentt
heybot
hleav
eaf
ter
Ipr
omi
seSnot
ovi
sither
.Imakemy
wayt
omybedr
oom andcur
lmy
sel
fint
o
abal
lthenbur
sti
ntot
ear
s.If
eel
her
ar
mswr
appi
ngar
oundme
“
Het
oldy
out
hathemov
edon?
”Inod
wi
thmyhead
“
OhmybabyI
’
m sor
rymay
bei
t’
sfort
he
best
”
“
It
’sdoesn’
thur
tanyl
esst
hough
mommy
.”
“
Youwi
l
lbef
inesweet
hear
tdon’
tcr
y”
wehearaknockont
hedoor
.
“
Comei
n”Mom shout
sandt
hedoor
opens
“
NonoMrMwangi
isher
e”
“
Ohwear
ecomi
ng”Shehel
psmeget
outoft
hebedt
henwemakeourwayt
o
t
hel
i
vingr
oom andset
tl
eont
hecouch
af
tergr
eet
ingshav
ebeenex
changed.
Kamar
iasi
tsonmyl
apandnest
leher
headagai
nstmychest
“
Wapi
Mama?
”(Wher
eismom)Iask
dad.Iwasex
pect
inghert
ocomet
oo.
“
yey
eyukokat
ikawaz
azi
wakeny
umba
haj
achukuav
izur
ihay
ayot
eunaj
uani
ki
asi
gani
anachopenda.
”(Shei
sather
par
ent
s’house,
shei
snott
aki
ngal
lthi
s
wel
l
.Youknowhowmuchshel
oves
y
ou.
)Myhear
tsi
nks
“
Hakunaki
tuki
nachobadi
l
ishani
nyi
ni
badowaz
azi
wangunami
mi
ni
takupendadai
ma.Weweni
waz
azi
bor
azai
di.
”(Not
hingi
sgoi
ngt
ochange
y
ouguy
sar
est
il
lmypar
ent
sandIwi
l
l
al
way
slov
eyou.Youar
ethebest
par
ent
s.)
“
Wuuasi
sez
wakemanj
ethi
na”mom
compl
ainsdadapol
ogi
zes
“
Whatl
anguagei
sthat
?”
“
Swahi
l
i”Dadsay
s
“
Whoi
sthi
sli
tt
lecut
ieher
e”Iknowt
hat
she’
sref
err
ingt
oKamar
ia
I
’
m scar
edmyhear
tist
huddi
ngIdon’
t
t
hinkI
’
mreadyf
ort
hisbutsooneror
l
aterIhav
etodoi
tsomi
ghtaswel
ldoi
t
now.It
akeahugebr
eat
handgat
hermy
st
rengt
htot
alk.
“
Mamameetmypumpki
n,Kamar
ia
she’
smydaught
er”

.
Mi
ra’
sMoonl
i
ghtPr
incessKamar
ia
CHAPTER40

Ther
e’sawkwar
dsi
l
encesur
roundi
ngus
andt
heonl
ysoundIcanheari
sthegu
gugut
hati
smadebymyhear
t.I
r
ememberhowmanyt
imesshet
oldme
t
hatshe’
snotr
eadyt
obeagr
andmot
her
nott
hatIwasr
eadyt
obeamot
herbut
oneofmyst
upi
dmi
stakesl
edmeher
e
r
egar
dlessIl
ovemydaught
ermor
ethan
any
thi
ngi
nthi
swor
ld.Thedayshe
f
oundmeal
mostendi
ngmyl
i
fewi
thmy
ant
idepr
essant
swasasi
gnf
ormet
hatI
hadt
ofi
ghthar
dandcl
i
mboutoft
his
dar
khol
e.Iowei
ttohert
ogi
vei
tal
lmy
best
.Iwantt
ocommi
tmy
sel
fin
ev
ery
thi
ngt
hatwi
l
lpul
lmeoutoft
his
dar
kpl
acej
ustf
orher
.
“
Uthi
ni?
”(Whatdi
dyousay
)shocki
nher
v
oicei
spal
pabl
e.GoshI
’
m soscar
ed,
I
t
hinkI
’
m goi
ngt
opeemy
sel
f.
“
Uhm uh”Iswal
l
owhar
dandpl
aywi
th
Kamar
ia’
sti
nyf
inger
s
“
Kamar
ia.
..
uhm.
.She’
­
smydaught
er”
Thel
astpar
tcomesoutasawhi
sper
.
“
Daught
erasi
nyoucar
ri
edherf
or9
mont
hsandpopheroutofy
our
v
agi
na?
”
“
Ehmama”Isaywi
thal
owv
oice
“
OhmyGod!
”Shescr
eamsi
nshock
“
She’
sbeaut
if
ul,
howol
disshe?
”Gogo
asks,
Idon’
tknowkey
enauhl
anganaphi
cozIwasi
ntr
oduci
ngmydaught
ert
omy
mom nother
“
She’
stur
ning4y
ear
smont
hend”
“
Ineedadr
inkt
hisi
sunbel
i
evabl
e”mom
say
s,she’
stot
all
yst
unnedandi
t’
s
under
standabl
e.
“
Hay
iNono,
cany
oust
opt
hinki
ngabout
al
cohol
justf
oronesecond!Howdoes
al
cohol
sol
vepr
obl
emsandi
nthi
scase
i
t’
snotapr
obl
em.Weshoul
dcel
ebr
ate
y
ouar
eagr
andmot
herai
n’
tyouhappy
?”
“
Happy
?Youwantmet
obehappyt
hat
shekeptmygr
anddaught
erf
rom mef
or
4f
ucki
ngy
ear
s!”Mom r
epl
i
eswi
thso
muchanger
“
Shedi
dn’
tkeepherf
rom y
ouMr
s
Khumal
o,shet
houghty
ouwer
edead”
Dadsay
swi
thacal
mvoi
ce.Il
ovehow
t
hismani
sal
way
scal
m baki
thi
.
“
Ohy
esshet
houghtI
’
m deadbutt
hat
doesn’
tchanget
hef
actt
hatIwoul
d
hav
elov
edt
obet
her
eforher
,Iwoul
d
hav
elov
etor
ubherswol
l
enf
eet
,feed
hercr
avi
ngs,
comf
ort
sher
,hol
dher
handwhenshegav
ebi
rt
handt
eachher
al
lthebasi
csshedi
dn’
tknowabout
mot
her
hood,
Iwoul
dhav
elov
edt
ogi
ve
hersuppor
t,l
ove,
war
mtht
hatIy
ear
ned
whenIwaspr
egnantwi
thher
!Nowshe
comeswi
thaf
oury
earol
dandt
ell
sme
she’
smygr
anddaught
er?
”Herv
oicei
s
l
acedwi
thpai
nandi
t’
sbr
eaki
ngmy
hear
tint
otwopi
eces.Idi
dn’
tex
pectt
his
It
houghtshewoul
dbemadatmef
or
f
all
i
ngpr
egnanti
nthef
ir
stpl
ace.I
under
standherpai
nandIt
hinkhadshe
beent
her
e,mypr
egnancywoul
dn’
thav
e
beenacont
ri
but
iont
omydepr
essi
on.I
n
f
actIwoul
dn’
thav
ehaddepr
essi
onat
al
l
.Ir
emembert
hedayIf
oundoutIwas
pr
egnanti
t’
swast
hedayIwasadmi
tt
ed
f
ort
ryi
ngt
oendmyl
i
feaf
terIwast
old
t
hatmymom r
eal
l
ydi
edandKhumal
o
washaunt
ingme.Idon’
tknowhowshe
sur
viv
ed,
she’
sasur
viv
ort
hisonebutI
wassoscar
ed.Thet
houghtofbr
ingi
ng
ahumanbei
ngt
othi
swor
ldasbl
i
ndasI
am i
naf
orei
gncount
rywi
thnooneby
mysi
deki
l
ledmemi
l
li
onst
imes.I
coul
dn’
tseemy
sel
fsur
viv
ingIt
hought
aboutt
hel
i
ttl
epr
eci
ousgi
ftIwas
car
ryi
ngi
nsi
deofmet
hatdi
dn’
tdeser
ve
t
obemot
her
edbymeandr
eal
i
zehow
br
utal
li
fei
s.Icannev
ershowmy
gr
ati
tudeenought
omom Cabaand
bab’
Mandl
a.Theygav
emet
her
eason
t
ohol
donespeci
all
yformyl
i
ttl
eone.
Theyst
oodbymet
hrought
hickandt
hin
unt
ilnow.Ir
ememberwhenIgav
ebi
rt
h
t
her
ewast
hisl
i
ghtt
hrought
he
dar
knessI
’
m st
umbl
i
ngi
nhenceI
namedmydaught
erKamar
iawhi
ch
meansbr
ightasamoonorl
i
keamoon,
she’
smymoonl
i
ght
.
“
Buti
t’
snotherf
aul
tNono,
youcan’
t
bl
ameher
.Cockr
oachi
stheonet
o
bl
ame”Gogosay
ssof
tl
y
“
Andy
out
hinkIdon’
tknowt
hat
?Of
cour
seIknow,
ifI
’
m hur
tli
ket
hishow
woul
dLwandl
eandZof
eel
?”OhGod
her
e’sanot
herpar
tthatI
’
m notr
eadyf
or
butsi
nceev
ery
thi
ngi
soutImi
ghtas
wel
l
.
“
Uhm mom.
.uh.
.”Ibr
eat
heoutl
oudl
y
“
What
?”
“
Lwenkosi
is….
nott
hef
ather
”
“
Heeehh?Whatdoy
oumeanLwandl
eis
nott
hef
ather
?”
“
Uhm.
.uhm”wor
dsar
est
ucki
nmy
t
hroat
sandmyhandsar
eshaki
ng
t
err
ibl
y.
“
Khul
uma!
”(Tal
k)Ij
umpupabi
t
“
It
’s.
..
it
’s…i
t’
sMal
umeSox
”Iwhi
sper
wi
thshame
“
Hay
iut
hini
?!
”(Whatdi
dyousay
?)
“
I’
m sor
rymamai
twasami
st…”
“
NonoIdon’
tunder
standhowandwhen?
It
houghty
ouwer
edat
ingLwandl
e,uSox
ungenangaphi
la!
”(Howi
sSoxi
s
i
nvol
vedher
e!)
“
We.
.He…”wor
dsar
efai
l
ingmeI
’
m
t
rembl
i
ngamess.
“
Youst
utt
ernow?Tal
kdammi
t!
”Her
hur
thaschangedt
oangernow,
the
mot
herwhoi
spai
nedt
hatshewasn’
t
t
her
edur
ingherdaught
er’
spr
egnancyi
s
nomor
e.
“
Thatdayhebr
oughthi
sbi
rt
hdaycake.
I
twasamomentofweaknessmi
xed
wi
thpai
nmommyI
’
m sosor
ry.
”
“
Howcoul
dyouhuhSoxoutofal
l
peopl
e!He’
s7y
ear
sol
dert
hany
ouMi
ra
andy
ouwer
est
il
lwi
thLwandl
ecoul
dn’
t
y
ouj
ustwai
ttoopeny
ourl
egs!
!”
“
I’
m sor
rymom I
…”Ahotst
ingi
ng
sensat
iononmycheekdi
stur
bsme
f
rom f
ini
shi
ngmysent
ence.
“
Nonomaan!
”Kamar
iabur
sti
ntoal
oud
sob
“
MrsKhumal
ohowdar
eyoul
ayy
our
handonmydaught
er,
especi
all
yinf
ront
herdaught
er!
”Dadsay
sst
ernl
y
“
Heydon’
tyoudar
etel
lmehowt
otr
eat
mydaught
er!
”
“
Unaj
uani
nini
naondokanaKamar
ia.
Nj
oomt
oto”(
YouknowwhatI
’
mleav
ing
wi
thKamar
ia.Comebaby
)Kamar
ia
wi
ggl
esher
sel
foutofmyar
msandgo
t
odadIpr
esume
“
Ninaamkamsi
chanamdogol
aki
ni
si
taki
kusemaki
tuni
tachocheabasi
ni
taondoka.Ni
tai
rudi
kesho”(
Im sor
ry
babygi
rlbutIdon'
twantt
osay
somet
hingIwi
l
lregr
etsoIwi
l
lleav
e.I
wi
l
lcomebackt
omor
row.
)
“
Babay
akenz
uri
asant
esanana
t
afadhal
ikumwambi
amamakwamba
ni
nakupendawot
ewawi
l
i”(
It
sokay
daddyt
hanky
ousomuchandpl
ease
t
ell
mom t
hatIl
ovey
oubot
h)
“
nakupendapi
a”Heki
ssesmycheek
andbi
dsf
arewel
lthenl
eav
eswi
tha
cr
yingKamar
ia.Myhear
tisi
npi
eces,
I
di
dn’
tthi
nkt
hingswoul
dbet
hisbad.
“
Youseewhaty
ouhav
edone!
”Gogo
shout
s
“
Iwon’
tli
stent
oaf
orei
gnmant
ell
i
ng
mehowt
odi
sci
pli
nemydaught
er!
”
“
Butdi
dyouhav
etodoi
tinf
ronther
daught
er,
Hay
imaanNokubongaandI
don’
tunder
standwhatt
hef
ussi
sabout
t
hef
ather
!Youwer
en’
tangr
yaboutt
his
butt
hemomentshement
ionedt
hatSox
i
sthef
ather
,yousawr
ed!
”
“
Mir
auf
ebi
l
emama,
don’
tyougeti
t!
She’
sawhor
ethatopensherl
egsf
or
manwhoi
sol
denought
obeheruncl
e.
Soxi
sol
dandpoor
!”Herwor
dsar
e
spl
i
tti
ngmyhear
tint
otwobutIcanhel
p
butf
eel
thatIdeser
vet
hem.I
’
m not
pr
oudandIwi
shIcoul
dtakebackt
he
handsoft
ime.
“
Unemi
hlol
ayaznawey
ouwer
esl
eepi
ng
wi
thev
ery
thi
ngt
hathadadi
ckand
Mf
ani
seni
ishey
ouragemat
e?awume
kancaneNono”
“
I’
mleav
ing,
goi
ngt
oki
l
lthatasshol
e!
Uz
ongaz
iuSox
!”
“
Nonocomebackher
e!”
“
Ngi
yabuy
a!”(
I’
m comi
ngback!
)Ihear
herwal
ki
ngaway
.Thi
sismessInev
er
pl
annedmal
umeSoxt
ofi
ndoutl
i
ket
his.
I
t’
sal
readybadt
hathemi
ssedal
most4
y
ear
sofpumpki
n’
sli
fe.
“
Don’
tcr
ynunuz
akagogo”shepul
l
sme
i
nherar
msandIl
eti
tal
lout
.Ican’
t
bel
i
evet
hatnotev
enadayhaspassed
si
nceIr
euni
tedwi
thmymot
herbutwe
ar
eal
readyf
ight
ing.Idon’
tknowhowI
managedt
ofal
lasl
eepbutI
’
m wokenup
byGogo.
“
Nunuz
a”
“
Gogo”
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
isher
efory
ou”What
i
shedoi
ngher
e?
“
Dol
l
face”Isi
ghandsi
tonmybut
t,Iwas
sl
eepi
ngont
hecouch
“
Iwi
l
lgi
vey
ouki
dssomespace”
“
Ther
e’snoneedf
ort
hatGogo,
Dol
l
face
andIwi
l
ltakeadr
ive”
“
Wher
ear
eyout
aki
ngher
?”
“
Tot
hebeachmay
be”
“
Pleasebr
ingherback”
“
Thanky
ou.
.comeDol
l
face”
“
Ineedt
ori
nsemyf
ace”
“
Youl
ookokaycome”Het
akesmyhand
“
ImaLwandl
ewher
e’sRocky
?”
“
Youknowy
oudon’
tneedRockywhen
y
ouar
ewi
thme”
“
Woz
aasambe”Hescoopsmeup
causi
ngmet
ogi
ggl
e
“
Int
shay
anamuhl
a”WehearGogo
say
ingasLwenkosi
wal
ksoutwi
thme.
Hebuckl
esmeupf
ir
stt
henwal
kst
ohi
s
si
de.Ihearhi
m get
ti
ngi
nthenbr
ingt
he
engi
net
oli
febef
oredr
ivi
ngof
f.
Ev
ery
thi
ngf
eel
sli
kei
t’
sst
il
lthesame
ev
ent
hesmel
lofhi
scar
.
“
Youwer
ecr
ying?
”
“
Wher
ear
eyout
aki
ngme?
”
“
Tot
hebeach?
”
“
Why
?”
“
Whatdoy
oumeanwhy
,Ihav
en’
tseen
i
nyouf
or4y
ear
sDol
l
face.Ij
ustwantt
o
spendsomet
imewi
thy
ou”
“
Howwoul
dyourgi
rl
fr
iendf
eel
about
t
hat
”Thewor
d‘gi
rl
fr
iend’
leav
esabi
tt
er
t
ast
einmymout
h
“
Let
’snott
alkaboutherpl
ease,
my
dol
l
face”
“
Lwenkosi
Idon’
twantt
ocauset
roubl
e
bet
weent
het
woofy
ou.Iknowf
orsur
eI
woul
dbehur
tifIf
oundouty
ouspent
t
imewi
thy
ourexpr
odi
gal
gir
lf
ri
end”
“
Sti
l
lIhav
en’
tfoundsomeonewhocal
l
s
meLwenkosi
.Ithasbeenpr
ovent
hat
y
ouwi
l
lbet
heoneandonl
y.Il
ovet
hat
,
i
tsoundsbet
terespeci
all
ywheni
t
comesf
rom t
hatcut
eli
tt
lemout
hof
y
our
s”Ican’
thel
pasmi
l
ethatt
ugst
he
cor
ner
sofmyl
i
ps.
“
Lwenkosi
”Isaybl
ushi
ng,
I’
mtal
ki
ng
aboutaser
iousmat
terbuthei
sfl
i
rti
ng
“
Ohandshecal
l
smeagai
n”Igi
ggl
e
“
Cany
oubeser
iouspl
ease?
”
“
I’
m ser
iousmyDol
l
face”
“
Yourgi
rl
fr
iend…”
“
It
’smeandy
ouher
ewhydoy
ouwant
t
otal
kaboutpeopl
ewhoar
enother
e.
Canwej
ustf
ocusonusj
usty
ouandme
nooneel
sel
i
kehowi
tuset
obe”
“
Itwasnev
erj
usty
ouandmet
her
ewas
Nandi
”Hel
aughsohhef
indi
t’
sfunny
.
“
Your
emembert
hedayy
out
oldhert
o
eatmaas”Wegi
ggl
e
“
Idi
dn’
tmeant
osayt
hat
,Iwasj
ust
annoy
edev
eryt
imewhenwewer
e
t
oget
hersheuset
ocal
lyou.I
t’
sir
ked
t
hehel
loutofme”
“
Youwer
ewor
kingy
our
sel
fupf
or
not
hingNandi
wasj
ustcar
ryi
ngmychi
l
d
not
hingmor
e.Ihav
enev
erl
ovedt
hat
gi
rl
”
“
Idon’
tknowhowbutsomehowI
bel
i
evedy
ouunt
ilIf
oundoutt
hatwhatI
t
houghty
ouandIshar
edwasy
ou
want
ingt
otast
emypussyandhel
pyour
uncl
e”Hel
etoutagr
oanoff
rust
rat
ion
“
Iwi
shIcant
akebackev
ery
thi
ng
Dol
l
face,
Ihat
emy
sel
fev
erydayf
or
whatIdi
d,I
’
m sor
ry”
“
Nott
hati
tdoesmat
ternowbuthav
e
y
ouev
erl
ovedme?
”Hesi
ghsheav
il
y
andt
hecari
ssl
ackeni
ngunt
ili
tst
ops
mov
ing.
“
Ofcour
seIl
ovedy
ou,
Ist
il
ldodol
l
face.
I
tmi
ghthav
est
art
edasf
akebuty
ou
secr
etl
yent
eredmyhear
tandpar
aly
zed
ev
erydi
mensi
onoft
imeandspacei
n
myl
i
fenowIl
i
vei
nat
rance.I
’
m
const
ant
lyconsumedbyy
ourt
hought
s
ev
enwheny
ouwer
emi
ssi
ngIuset
ocr
y
dayandni
ghtwonder
ingi
fwher
every
ou
wer
eyouwer
eokay
,eat
ingwel
land
hav
esomet
hingt
owear
.Day
stur
ned
i
ntomont
hsandmont
hsi
ntoy
ear
smy
whol
ewor
ldshutdown.Icoul
dn’
tbear
t
hepai
nofl
osi
ngy
ouespeci
all
yli
ket
hat
.
Ispentmyt
imescr
uci
fyi
ngmy
sel
ffor
whatIdi
dtoy
ou.Il
ongedf
ort
hechance
t
otel
lyouhowsor
ryIam andhowmuch
doIl
ovey
oubuty
ouwer
enev
erf
ound.
I
t’
sbecameunbear
abl
eformet
hatI
want
edt
odr
if
tawayf
rom t
her
eal
i
tyand
r
esor
tedt
odr
ugs.
”Hesnuf
fl
esIj
ust
knowt
hathe’
scr
ying.Forar
udeand
ar
rogantguyhehasnev
erhi
dehi
s
v
ulner
abi
l
ityt
omeandt
hat
’soneoft
he
t
hingsIl
oveabouthi
m.If
iddl
eforhi
s
handunt
ilIr
eachi
tandsqueez
eit
.
“
Iknowhowmuchy
ouhat
edwhenI
smokeweedbutIcoul
dn’
ttakei
tmy
Dol
l
face,
itwasj
ustt
oomuch.If
elt
r
esponsi
blef
ory
ourdi
sappear
anceand
I
…”Hebur
sti
ntoasobIcan’
thel
pbut
al
l
owmyt
ear
stof
all
too.Ipul
lhi
m
cl
oseandsqueez
ehi
minmyar
mshe
sobsl
i
keababywet
ti
ngmyneck.
“
Iov
erdosedr
ugsIwi
shedIdi
edbut
whenIsawhowbr
okenmyf
ami
l
ywas,
I
knewIhadt
odosomet
hing.Iwentt
oa
r
ehabandt
aughtmy
sel
fhowt
oli
ve
wi
thouty
ouev
ent
hought
her
ewasno
daypassedwi
thoutmet
hinki
ngabout
y
ou”Ibi
temyl
i
pshar
dunt
ilIt
ast
ebl
ood.
Idoubt
edt
hatheev
erl
ovedmeaf
ter
f
indi
ngoutabouthi
sint
ent
ionsf
rom t
he
wor
dgobutwhathej
ustsai
dit
’smake
mebel
i
evet
hathel
ovedev
enaf
terhe
sawmewi
thmal
umeSoxhest
il
lcar
ed
andl
ovedme.HowIwi
sht
hingsdi
dn’
t
t
urnoutt
hewayt
heydi
dwewoul
dhav
e
f
oundachancet
ofi
xourr
elat
ionshi
p
butnowi
t’
stool
ate.Hehassomeonei
n
hi
sli
feandIal
sohav
eadaught
ernow
whomi
ghtbear
emi
nderofabet
ray
al.
Lwenkosi
andIcannev
erbet
oget
her
.
“
I’
m sor
ryLwenkosi
,I
’mr
eal
l
ysor
ryf
or
t
hepai
nyouwentt
hrough.I
’
m gl
ady
ou
di
dn’
tdi
ethatwoul
dhav
eki
l
ledmei
fI
wasev
ergoi
ngt
ofi
ndout
.Icani
magi
ne
howmom Zo,
Snoandy
ourf
atherwoul
d
hav
efel
t.I
’
m pr
oudofy
out
haty
ou
f
oughtt
onotal
l
owy
ourpai
nand
suf
fer
ingmakey
ourl
i
femi
ser
abl
e.”He
pul
l
sbackf
rom myembr
aceandmy
handf
iddl
esi
twayt
ohi
swetf
aceand
wi
peshi
stear
s.
“
Youar
enotmadatmet
hatImov
ed
on?
”
“
Idumpedy
ouf
ir
stnj
ena”Hechuckl
es
“
Buty
oudi
dn’
tmeani
t,di
dyou?
”Isi
gh
“
Ofcour
seIdi
dn’
tmeani
t.Il
ovedy
ou
cuddl
ecakes,
Iwashopi
ngt
haty
ou
woul
dcomedur
ingt
heweekandmay
be
begmet
onotl
eav
eyouorsomet
hing
buty
oudi
dn’
t,
tomei
tfel
tli
kev
eley
ou
nev
ercar
ednorl
ovedme.Icr
iedmy
sel
f
t
osl
eept
hewhol
eweekwi
thnoonet
o
comf
ortme.Mom wasangr
yatmef
or
bei
ngst
upi
dandal
l
owi
ngy
out
ouseme.
Icoul
dn’
treachGugut
hent
het
imey
ou
deci
dedt
oshowupuhm uh…I
’
m sor
ry
aboutt
hatLwenkosi
andi
tbr
eaksmy
hear
tthatev
enaf
tery
ousawt
haty
ou
st
il
ll
ovedme.Ngi
yax
oli
sakakhul
u”He
cat
chesmyt
earwi
thhi
sthumbbef
orei
t
f
all
s
“
Iwasbey
ondhur
t,y
ourmoansandhi
s
gr
oanswer
ehaunt
ingmebutI
under
stoodbecauseofwhatIdi
d.I
t
houghty
oual
sonev
ercar
ednorl
oved
mesoy
oumov
edon.Idi
dn’
tcomet
hat
weekbecauseIdr
ovest
rai
ghtt
oat
ree
soIwasi
nthehospi
tal
.Iwant
edt
otal
k
t
oyouf
acet
ofacehenceIdi
dn’
tcal
l
y
ouandt
hedaycamewast
hedayIwas
di
schar
ged”NowIf
eel
wor
se
“
I’
m sor
ry,
Idi
dn’
tknowLwenkosi
.”
“
It
’sokaynowl
et’
smov
eonf
rom
ev
ery
thi
ngt
hathappenedpl
easeI
’
m
beggi
ngy
ouMaShwabada.
”
“
Ever
ythi
ngt
hathappenedi
nthepast
wi
l
lst
ayi
nthepast
”
“
Thanky
ou”Hel
eanshi
sfor
ehead
agai
nstmi
ne,
hisbr
eat
hissoot
hing
agai
nstmyf
aceandhi
sscenti
smaki
ng
medi
zzyi
nagoodwayi
fthat
’sev
en
makessense.Thef
eel
ofhi
swar
m
pal
msagai
nstt
hesi
desofmyf
ace
makesmemoanssof
tl
y.Hebr
usheshi
s
l
i
psonmi
ne,
kissmeal
readypl
ease.I
ts
l
i
keher
eadmymi
ndhesandwi
chmy
l
owerl
i
pandj
ustt
henhephoner
ings.
“
Umm sur
e”
“
Hawubabyi
sthathowy
ouanswery
our
phonenow”Hi
sphonemustbe
connect
edt
othebl
uet
oot
h
“
I’
m busyst
handwasami
att
hemoment
,
Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
ater
”
“
Ohokayngi
yakut
handaLwandl
elwami
”
“
Iknowby
e”
“
Ain’
tyougoi
ngt
otel
lme,
youl
oveme
t
oobaby
”
“
Uyaz
inj
eukut
hingi
yakt
hndaAy
anda”
(
youknowt
hatIl
ovey
ouAy
anda)t
he
annoy
ancei
nhi
svoi
cecan’
tbemi
ssed
“
Ohokayby
e”Ibi
temyt
oungehar
d,t
his
f
eel
ssowr
ongwhyam Iev
enher
e.
“
TakemehomeLwenkosi
now”
“
ButDol
l
face…”
“
Hay
iLwenkosi
!”
“
Don’
tshoutatme!YouandIar
e
spendi
ngt
hedayt
oget
herf
ini
shand
kl
aar
!”
“
Youcan’
tfor
cemet
ospendt
heday
wi
thy
ouphel
a!”Hedoesn’
trepl
ybut
st
artt
hecaranddr
iveof
f.Thedr
ivei
s
si
l
entIdon’
tunder
standwhatar
ehi
s
i
ntent
ionsr
eal
l
y.Thel
astt
hingIwantt
o
causet
roubl
ebet
weent
het
wooft
hem
andIknowt
hatIwon’
tbeabl
etor
esi
st
my
sel
fwhenI
’
m wi
thhi
m.Hi
stouchset
mysoul
wit
hfi
re.
“
Come”Het
akesmyhandsi
ntohi
s,
af
terhej
ustpul
lov
er.Icant
ell
thatwe
ar
enothome.
“
Isai
dtakemehomeLwenkosi
”
“
Pleasej
ustt
hisoncepl
ease
MaShwabadaomuhl
e”ohhowcanI
r
efusenowwhenhemakesmebl
ush
l
i
ket
his.It
akehi
shandandhehel
psme
outoft
hecar
.Il
ovehowIt
rusthi
m wi
th
myl
i
fewhenI
’
m wi
thhi
m.Hebecomes
myey
esandhel
ovesi
t.Atf
ir
sti
tuset
o
annoymebecauseIt
houghthet
hinkI
can’
ttakecar
eofmy
sel
fbuthet
oldme
t
hat
’snott
hecase.Wecat
chupwhi
l
e
enj
oyi
ngr
ickshawr
ideandi
t’
smyf
ir
st
t
imer
idi
ngone.Theex
per
iencei
s
amaz
ingt
hebr
eez
eissoot
hingi
nmy
hai
r.Wer
etur
nbackandt
akepi
cswi
th
ourpul
l
er.Hebuy
susmi
l
kshakesf
ir
st
t
henwedr
ivebackhome.Thedr
ivei
s
f
il
ledwi
thj
okesandl
aught
er.
“
Ihadawonder
ful
dayt
hanky
ouso
much”Hesay
saf
terpul
l
ingov
er
“
Ial
sohadal
ovel
yti
met
hanky
ou”He
cupsmyf
ace
“
Ihav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
ohol
dmy
sel
fbutI
can’
tany
mor
e”Hesay
sbef
orecapt
uri
ng
myl
i
psi
ntohi
s.Iwantt
opul
lbackbutI
can’
thel
pitIf
istonhi
st-
shi
rtast
he
ki
ssdeepens.I
tfeel
ssomagi
cal
the
wayhi
sli
psar
econnect
ingwi
thmi
ne
andourt
onguesr
oll
i
ngagai
nsteach
ot
her
.If
eel
war
mthr
adi
ati
ngt
hroughout
mywhol
ebody
.Ipul
lbackpant
ing
“
Thi
siswr
ongLwenkosi
”
”
Youl
ovemeandIl
ovey
ou,
ther
e’s
not
hingwr
ongaboutt
hat
”Hi
svoi
cei
s
husky
“
Nopl
easest
ayawayf
rom me,
Idon’
t
wantt
oseey
ouagai
nLwenkosi
”
“
Mir
apl
ease…”
“
NoLwenkosi
,i
t’
sbet
tert
hisway
.Ihat
e
t
hatIl
ovey
ousomuchandIdon’
ttr
ust
my
sel
fwi
thy
ou,
pleasel
eav
emeal
one”
“
Wuuushamesi
swaz
ewaf
angobai
m
notst
ayi
ngawayf
rom y
ou,
notnow,
not
ev
er!
”

-
I
’
m ov
erf
loat
ingwi
thj
oy,
itst
il
lfeel
s
sur
real
thatmydaught
eri
sback.She
hasgr
ownsomuchbutherwei
ghti
s
wor
ryi
ngme.Lastni
ghtIcoul
dn’
tsl
eepI
wat
chhersl
eepi
ngi
nmyar
msIwasso
scar
edt
hatwhenIwakeupshewi
l
lbe
gone.Idon’
tthi
nkIev
erwantt
oleav
e
hersi
ght
.Whenshesai
dthatshecan’
t
bel
i
eveshesanki
ntodepr
essi
onIdi
dn’
t
i
twast
hatdeept
othepoi
ntt
hatshe
t
akesant
idepr
essant
s.Ohumt
anami
baki
thi
Ijustwi
shIcaner
aseev
erypai
n
shehasev
erencount
eredi
nherl
i
fe.
She’
ssoy
oungandbeaut
if
ulshe
deser
vest
obehappyl
i
keherpeer
s.I
’
m
goi
ngt
odowhat
everi
t’
stakef
orhert
o
behappyagai
n.I
tbr
eaksmyhear
tthat
she’
shur
ti
ngaboutLwandl
emov
ingon,
Ihopeher
eal
l
ymov
edonbecauset
he
l
astt
hingmydaught
erneedsnowi
sa
boywho’
scaughtupbet
weent
wogi
rl
s.
Sheneedst
oheal
fir
st,
getherl
i
fe
t
oget
hert
henshecanst
artdat
ing.I
can’
tbegi
ntodescr
ibet
hepai
nIf
elt
whenshet
oldmeKamar
iai
sher
daught
er.Thet
houghtofl
osi
ngout
r
aisi
ngmygr
anddaught
ert
ear
sme
apar
t.Iwoul
dhav
elov
edt
obet
her
efor
herandshowhersuppor
tmymom
nev
ergav
emebutt
hemomentshesay
s
Soxi
sthef
atherIl
osti
t.I
’
m ont
heway
nowt
oSox
’sapar
tment
.I’
mfumi
ngwi
th
anger
,Iwanthi
mtot
ell
mewher
edi
dhe
gett
her
ightt
osl
eepwi
thmydaught
er?
Whati
rksmet
hemosti
sthathei
sina
r
elat
ionshi
pwi
thGugu!Ipul
lov
erand
makemywayt
othedooraf
terget
ti
ng
outoft
hecar
.Guguopenst
hedoorf
or
meshe’
swear
ingSox
’sshi
rtonl
y
“
Mama”
“
Uphi
uSox
”(wher
e’sSox
)Isaypushi
ng
mywayi
n
“
He’
sint
hel
i
vingr
oom.I
sev
ery
thi
ng
okaymama”Iwal
kst
rai
ghtt
othel
i
ving
r
oom andf
indhi
m wat
chi
ngt
vwi
thhi
s
box
eronl
y.
“
MrsK”he’
ssur
pri
sedt
oseeme
“
MrsKukunuka!Whot
hef
uckgav
eyou
ar
ightt
oputt
hatst
inki
ngl
i
ttl
edi
ckof
y
our
sint
omydaught
erhuh!
!”Isl
aphi
m,
hegr
oansandl
ooksatmewi
thgui
l
tand
t
hatf
uel
smyangerIgi
vehi
m anot
her
sl
ap
“
Mom st
opi
twhat
’sgoi
ngon?Youcan’
t
comeher
eandat
tackSox
”
“
Youst
ayt
hef
uckoutoft
his!Wena
woz
anj
andi
ni”
“
I’
m sor
ryOkayI
’
mreal
l
ysor
ry!
”
“
Didn’
tIt
ell
yout
ost
ayawayf
rom my
daught
er!
?”
“
Youdi
dbut
…”Isl
aphi
m agai
n
“
Buty
oudi
dn’
tli
stent
omeasshol
e!Si
es
uhambaul
alanez
inganeumdal
a
kangaka!
”Iat
tackhi
m unt
ilIseebl
ood
comi
ngoutofhi
snose
“
Idi
dn’
tpl
ant
osl
eepwi
thMi
raI
…”
“
Hahy
ousl
eptwi
thMi
raSox
?”Gugu
askswi
thshock
“
BabyI
’
m sor
ryI
..
”
“
OhmyGodSoxhowcoul
dyou!
”She’
s
cr
yinghy
ster
ical
l
y
“
Itwasbef
orey
ouandIwer
etoget
her
babyI
’
m sor
ry”
”
Iknewi
t!Youknewi
twheny
ousai
d
y
oul
ovemydaught
ery
ouwer
ely
ing!
Youwer
elust
ingov
erher
!Howdar
eyou
mov
eonwi
thherbestf
ri
endi
fyoucl
aim
t
olov
eher
?”Ipunchhi
m hi
sface
“
Whatmakesmeangr
yist
hatnotonl
y
di
dyouputt
hatr
ott
enpeni
sofy
our
s
i
ntohery
oul
efty
ourseednx
!”
“
What
?”Soxsay
s
“
Howdoy
ouknowal
loft
hismama?
”
Asksacr
yingGugu
“
Mir
acamebackl
astni
ghtandt
odayI
f
oundoutLenj
ayam’
mit
hisay
azkut
hi
ngi
kubul
ale!
!”Gugubur
sti
ntoal
oudcr
y
“
Mir
ahaschi
l
dwi
thme?
”
“
Stayt
hef
uckawayf
rom daught
erand
mygr
anddaught
er!
”
“
MrsKbutIdeser
vet
oknowmychi
l
d”
“
Uyany
ayoudeser
venot
hing!I
fyoudar
e
getnearmydaught
erand
gr
anddaught
erIwi
l
lki
l
lyounx
!”Imake
myawayl
eav
ingt
hef
ight
ing.GoshI
hav
enev
erbeenangr
yli
ket
his!Soxpho
aghaMi
ral
i
kemaki
ngmeangr
yjehov
a
l
enganeangaz
ingi
zoy
enz
ani
!
HappyBi
rt
hdayNel
i
siweSi
gwaneand
Nel
l
iesi
weMpumel
eloMt
sweni

CHAPTER41

I
’
m nowpay
ingf
ormyt
wobot
tl
esof
v
odka,
aft
erIl
eftSox
’sapar
tmentI
dr
ovet
othenear
estpubandgr
il
l.Ineed
adr
inkt
ocal
m my
sel
fdown,
I’
m so
angr
y,I
’
m ev
enshaki
ng.
“
Pleasest
op,
she’
snotbuy
ingt
he
al
cohol
any
mor
e”It
urnandl
ookathi
m,
hecan’
tbeser
ious.
“
I’
mtheonepay
ingr
ightboy
,sopl
ease
don’
tli
stent
oot
herpeopl
e”Thepoor
bar
manl
ooksatmet
henatKhuz
ani
“
Ehndodangi
thebuy
isel
alost
hwal
a!”(
I
sai
dtakebackt
hatal
cohol
!)Hehast
his
i
nti
midat
ingl
ookonhi
sfaceandi
t’
s
wor
kingont
hebar
man.
“
Woz
asambe”(
Comel
et’
sgo)Het
akes
myhandandwewal
kout
.GodI
’
m so
angr
y,whatt
hehel
lwast
hat
!
“
Whatt
hef
uckwast
hatKhuz
ani
huh!
Uy
ahl
any
a!”
“
Ihav
ebeenv
erypat
ientwi
thy
ougi
vi
ng
y
ouaspacet
omaket
hisdeci
sionon
y
ourownbutIcanseet
haty
ouwon’
t.
Youwi
l
lqui
tal
cohol
whet
hery
oul
i
kei
t
ornot
,doy
ouhearme?
”Whot
hehel
l
doeshet
hinkhei
s?
“
HeheKhuz
ani
ngeki
ssnj
eey
odwa,
you
t
hinknowy
oucant
ell
mewhatt
odo
huh?
”Hechuckl
esandopenshi
smout
h
t
osaysomet
hingbuthest
opsandt
akes
mycarkey
sfr
om myhand.
“
Geti
nthecar
”Hesay
saf
teropeni
ng
t
hedoor
.Igeti
ncar
,hebuckl
esmef
ir
st
bef
oregoi
ngt
othedr
iversi
de.Wedr
ive
i
ntot
alsi
l
ence,
hei
sgr
ippi
ngont
he
st
eer
ingwheel
har
dwi
thhi
spul
sing
hands.Icanseet
hathe’
sangr
ytheway
hi
sjawsar
ecl
enchi
ngnonest
op.It
hen
not
icet
hathe’
snotdr
ivi
ngi
nthe
di
rect
ionofhomebutI
’
m notgoi
ngt
o
askbecauseIhav
enev
erseenKhuz
ani
t
hisangr
y.Hei
sal
way
ssweetand
gent
le.Hepul
l
supatt
hisbeaut
if
ul
si
ngl
est
oryhouset
hathasapool
.
“
Uyez
anoma?
”(Ar
eyoucomi
ngornot
)
Hesay
saf
teropeni
ngmydoorIst
epout
oft
hecarandf
oll
owhi
m.Thei
nter
iori
s
ev
enmor
ebeaut
if
ult
hant
heex
ter
ior
.
“
Ihav
esomet
hingv
eryi
mpor
tantt
o
f
ini
shup,
Iwi
l
ldr
ivey
ouhomeaf
ter
.
Makey
our
sel
fcomf
ort
abl
e,Iwi
l
lbei
n
myst
udyr
oom ory
oucancomewi
th
me,
ther
e’sacouchi
nmyst
udyr
oom”
Ohsot
hisi
shi
shouse,
it’
sver
ycl
eanf
or
amanwhost
aysal
one,
Imustsay
.I
wonderi
fhedoest
hecl
eani
nghi
msel
f
ort
her
e’swomani
nvol
ved.Ichooset
o
f
oll
owhi
mtohi
sst
udyr
oom andset
tl
e
ont
hecouchashesi
tonhi
sdeskand
getonwi
thwhat
everhi
sdoi
ngonhi
s
l
apt
op.Ist
areathi
m,If
eel
li
keI
’
m
seei
nghi
mfort
hef
ir
stt
ime.He’
sreal
l
y
aney
ecandy
,Il
ovehowhebi
test
he
i
nsi
deofhi
smout
hwhenhe’
s
concent
rat
ing.Hemakesaf
ewcal
l
s
andIcant
ell
thatt
hey
'r
ebusi
ness
r
elat
ed,
theconv
ersat
ioni
sabout
sof
twar
esandapps.Hal
fanhourl
ater
,
I
'
m st
il
lsi
tt
ingher
e,beggi
ningt
oget
bor
ednow.
“
I’
mleav
ing,
Idon’
tknowwhydi
dyou
ev
enbr
ingmeher
e”
“
Wai
tI’
m al
mostf
ini
shed”
“
Hay
iKhuz
ani
,yazIshoul
dbeatt
he
comf
ort
sofmyhomehav
ingmyv
odka
butno,
youhadt
oint
erf
erei
nmy
busi
ness!
”
“
Stopshout
ingatme!
”
“
Ngi
yahamba”(
I’
mleav
ing)
“
Youl
i
kebei
ngdi
ff
icul
tBonga,
it’
s
ex
haust
ingr
eal
l
y”
“
Idi
dn’
tasky
out
obr
ingmeher
e,y
ou
woul
dn’
tbeex
haust
edby
e!”Imakemy
wayt
othedoor
“
Yourcarkey
s”Hesay
sget
ti
ngupt
hen
wal
kst
owar
dsme.I
’
m ex
pect
inghi
mto
gi
vememykey
sbuthecapt
uresmyl
i
ps
i
ntohi
s.Theki
ssi
ssl
ow,
gent
leand
l
acedwi
thdeepl
ove.Hepul
l
smecl
oser
t
ohi
sbodywi
thhi
sonehandasIwr
ap
myar
msar
oundhi
sneck,
int
ensi
fyi
ng
t
heki
ss.Ipr
essmybodycl
osert
ofeel
hi
sst
rai
nedhar
dnessagai
nstmybody
.
Hi
sonehandsl
i
desi
tswaydownmy
but
tandsqueez
esi
tcausi
ngmet
o
moansof
tl
y.If
eel
war
mthspr
eadi
ng
t
hroughoutmywhol
ebody
.Wi
thaswi
ft
mov
ehe’
sont
opofmeont
hecouch.
Hepul
l
shi
sli
psawayf
rom mi
neand
ki
sseshi
swaydownmyneckt
omy
cl
eav
age.Het
akest
hez
ipperofmy
kneel
engt
hzi
ppercl
eav
agepenci
ldr
ess
bet
weenhi
steet
handsl
i
dei
tdown,
r
eveal
i
ngmybar
eboobsandbl
ackl
ace
pant
ies.Ihearhi
m gr
oani
ngashel
ooks
atmybodywi
thsomuchdi
sir
e.
“
Damny
ouar
esogor
geous!
”He
dev
our
smyl
i
psi
nascor
chi
ngki
ss
whi
l
esqueez
ingmyboobandr
oll
i
nga
f
ingeronmyst
if
fni
ppl
e.Ibi
temyl
i
ps
st
if
li
ngamoanohi
t’
sfeel
ssogood.I
t’
s
been4y
ear
s,Ial
mostf
orgothowgood
i
t’
sfeel
shav
ingamant
olav
ishmybody
.
Thegr
eedi
nhi
sey
esashel
ooksatmy
br
eastf
uel
sthef
ir
ebet
weenmyl
egst
o
sendf
lamest
hroughmywhol
ebody
.
El
ect
ri
cpl
easur
eembr
acemywhol
e
bodyashet
akeoneni
ppl
ebet
weenhi
s
l
i
ps,
fli
cki
ngt
het
ipofhi
stoungeagai
nst
i
t.Imoanl
oudl
yIasf
eel
thedesper
ate
needbui
l
dupdownt
her
e
“
Kkkkk”I
m soaki
ngandmybodyi
s
cr
yingoutf
orhi
m.Ineedmor
e,Iwant
mor
ebuthe’
staki
nghi
ssweetper
fect
t
ime.Hegi
vest
heot
herboobt
hesame
at
tent
ionbef
oregl
i
dinghi
sli
psdownmy
bel
l
y,sendi
ngt
ingl
i
ngsensat
ion.He
ski
l
lful
l
ytakesmypant
iesof
fwi
thhi
s
onehandsi
ncet
heot
herhasanar
m
st
ri
ng.Hel
i
cksathi
sli
psatt
hesi
ghtof
mypussyandsmel
l
sit
“
Oht
hel
oveIhav
efort
hesmel
lofy
our
pussysnookums”Het
akesal
ongsni
ff
i
nhal
i
ngal
lthescentofmywomanhood
If
eel
myst
omachf
lut
ter
ingasmypussy
cl
encheswi
thneed.Hespr
eadsmyl
egs
apar
trev
eal
i
ngmydr
ippi
ngwetcunt
andl
ooksupatmehi
sgaz
eisi
ntense
andhi
sey
eli
dsar
eheav
ywi
thdesi
re.
“
Fuck!Beaut
if
ulpussy
,youhav
ebabyI
j
ustwannadev
ouri
t”Hegr
oansand
spanksmynuncausi
ngmet
owhi
mper
hi
sname
“
Khuz
ani
i
i”
“
Whatbaby
?”Hespanksi
tagai
nand
agai
nohmyGodI
’
m goi
ngt
oex
plode!
“
Kpl
easeee”Ibegdesper
atel
y
“
Khul
umanami
sthandwasami
”(
Tal
kto
memyl
ove)
“
Eatmepl
easebaby
,Ineedt
ofeel
your
t
oungeonme”Her
unshi
sfi
nger
ti
psup
anddownmyi
nnert
highssl
owl
yand
gent
le.Mybodycan’
ttaket
het
ease
any
mor
ebuthe’
senj
oyi
ngt
otor
tur
eme.
Thewar
mthofhi
stongueonmyi
nner
t
highsi
ncr
easet
heant
ici
pat
ion.He
keepst
easi
ngmeandIcanf
eel
my
t
ear
sthr
eat
eni
ngt
ocome
“
Kpl
easeI
’
m beggi
ng”
“
Howdoesi
tfeel
s”
“
It
’st
ort
urebaby
”
“
Ifeel
exact
lyt
hesamewheny
ou
di
srespectme,
am Iy
ourchi
l
d
snookums?
”
“
No!
”
“
Whatam I
?”
“
Youar
emydaddyK”
“
Thenwhyar
eyoudi
srespect
ingme?
”
Hespanksmypussy
“
I’
m sor
rybaby
!”
“
Ukhul
umanami
ngat
hiwehl
aent
abeni
”
Hespanksmynunagai
n
“
Ngi
yax
oli
sast
handwasami
i
ii
”
“
Uyangey
isasnookums”Hesqueez
esI
t
t
ight
lyIscr
eam
“
I’
m sor
ryDaddyK”I
’
mint
ear
sri
ghtnow
t
het
ort
urei
stoomuchIwantt
orel
ease
sobad.Heki
ssesmywetf
oldsgent
ly
andpar
tthem t
ogai
nanaccessofmy
engor
gedcl
i
tthati
sachi
ngt
obel
i
cked.
Hi
stoungedar
tint
ome,
ever
ymuscl
ein
mei
squi
ver
ingashi
stonguewander
s
al
ongmyf
oldsandbi
tesmyswol
l
encl
i
t
gent
lycausi
ngmet
ojer
kup.Hehol
ds
mef
ir
mlyi
npl
aceandal
l
owmet
oenj
oy
t
hesweetbl
i
ssofhi
stoungemaki
ng
l
ovet
ome.If
eel
hist
wof
inger
ssl
i
ding
andgr
oanwi
thpl
easur
e.Thi
sisbey
ond
ex
hil
arat
inghe’
sdoi
ngt
hingst
hatI
’
m
unabl
etoputi
ntowor
ds.Ican’
tcont
ain
my
sel
fandI
’
m sur
eev
ent
henei
ghbor
s
canhearmebutheywhenhegotmagi
c
t
oungeandf
inger
swhatcanawoman
do.Imov
emyhi
pst
omeeteachst
roke
ofhi
sfi
nger
sashesuckmycl
i
t
“
OhKohy
esss”I
’
m socl
oseIbuckmy
hi
psuncont
rol
l
abl
yhol
dinghi
shead
cl
oset
omypussyunt
ilanor
gasm hi
t
mehar
dandl
eav
esmebr
eat
hless.
“
Heyar
eyouokay
”
“
YeahIsemi
passedout
”Isay
br
eat
hlessl
y.Hechuckl
esandki
sshi
s
wayt
hroughmyl
i
ps.Iopenmyey
es
l
azi
l
yandl
ookathi
m,t
her
e’ssmi
l
eof
sat
isf
act
ionpl
ast
eredonhi
sface.
“
Youar
esobeaut
if
ulmyj
aan”He
car
essesmyf
acebef
orepl
ant
ingapeck
onmynose.
“
Thanky
oudaddyK”Isaybl
ushi
ng,
he
get
supf
rom meanddi
sappear
sthen
comesbackwi
that
owel
towi
peme
cl
ean.Igetupandseeawetspotont
he
couch,
Igr
oanandhi
demyf
acewi
thmy
hands.Hegi
ggl
esandpul
l
smet
ohi
s
ar
m
“
Heyt
her
e’snot
hingt
obeembar
rassed
about
”Heki
ssesmyhai
randhol
dsme
t
ight
ly.Icoul
dst
ayi
nhi
sar
msf
orev
er,
I
nev
ert
houghtIwi
l
lfeel
li
ket
hisf
orany
ot
hermanex
ceptKhumal
o.Hepul
l
sme
backandki
ssesmyf
oreheadaf
tert
hatI
getdr
essed.Het
akesmyhandandsi
t
onhi
schai
rpul
l
ingmeohhi
slap.
“
Wehav
etot
alk”
“
Isai
dI’
m sor
ryKhuz
ani
,Iwi
lnev
er
di
srespecty
ou”
“
I’
m nott
alki
ngaboutt
hat
”
“
Oh”
“
Yes”Hel
i
nkshi
shandwi
thmymi
ne
andki
ssesi
t
“
Iunder
standt
haty
ouar
eangr
yabout
Mi
rahav
ingachi
l
dwi
thSoxbuty
ou
needt
otor
nitdownBonga”Ir
oll
my
ey
es
“
Iseemom t
oldy
ou”
“
Dontr
oll
yourey
esatme”
“
I’
m sor
ry”I
’
m soannoy
edaboutt
hese
t
woal
way
stal
ki
ngaboutmei
t’
snot
f
unnyany
mor
e.
“
Ify
oucont
inuel
i
ket
his,
youar
egoi
ng
t
oloseMi
rat
otheMwangi
’
s.Ican’
t
bel
i
evet
hati
t’
snotev
enadayshecame
backy
ousl
apherandi
nsul
tedher
”
“
WhatwasIsupposedt
odoKhuz
ani
t
hankherf
orsl
eepi
ngwi
thaboy7y
ear
s
ol
dert
henher
?”
“
Ofcour
senotbut
…”
“
Ther
e’snobutMi
rai
smaki
ngmeangr
y
uhambael
alanj
euSoxpho?
”
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thSox
?”
“
Whatdoy
oumeanwhat
’swr
ongwi
th
Sox?He’
sol
dandpoor
”Hel
ooksatme
wi
thar
aisedbr
ow
“
Ohj
ustbecausehe’
spoorandol
dhe
shoul
dn’
tfat
hery
ourgr
anddaught
er?
”
“
Soxt
ookadv
ant
ageofmydaught
er
Khuz
ani
,vel
ehedoesn’
tdeser
vet
o
f
athermygr
anddaught
er.
”
“
Becausehe’
spoorwowIcan’
tbel
i
eve
y
our
ightnow.Youar
eunder
mini
ngt
he
poorguyasi
fyouwer
ebor
nri
ch?
”
“
Uyabhedamanj
e”
“
I’
mtel
l
ingt
het
rut
h.You,
ofal
lpeopl
e
shoul
dknowbet
ter
,youshoul
dknow
t
hatwedon’
tchoosewher
ewecome
f
rom.JustbecauseSoxdoesn’
thav
e
t
hemoneyy
ouhav
eofwhi
chy
ou
i
nher
it
edf
rom y
ourl
atehusbanddoesn’
t
meany
ouar
ebet
tert
hanhi
m orshoul
d
degr
adehi
m.Youar
edoi
ngex
act
lywhat
t
hoseki
dsuset
odot
oyouatschool
to
hi
m,maki
ngmocker
yofy
oubecauseof
y
ourbackgr
oundy
ouhadnocont
rol
of.
Youneedt
ogetof
fthathi
ghhor
se,
it
doesn’
tsui
tyousnookums”Those
wor
dshi
thomebuthe’
snotf
ini
shed
“
What
'sdonei
sdone,
ther
e’snot
hingwe
canchange.Ir
eal
l
ydon’
tli
kehowy
ou
ar
ehandl
i
ngt
hingsr
ightnow,
regar
ding
t
hissi
tuat
ion.I
t’
swasami
stakegi
veher
abr
eak.Shedoesn’
tneedal
loft
hisr
ight
now,
youshoul
dbehappyandbondi
ng
wi
thheraf
ter4y
ear
syout
wosepar
ated.
Rememberwhenshel
eftt
hings
bet
weent
het
woofy
ouwer
enotgood.
Youneedt
owor
kony
ourr
elat
ionshi
p
wi
thy
ourdaught
er.Sheneedsher
mot
herr
ightnow,
whowoul
dsuppor
t
hersot
hatshecanpul
lthr
ough.St
op
ki
l
li
nghersel
fest
eem bycal
l
ingher
namesandsl
appi
ngher
,youar
enot
hel
pingt
hesi
tuat
ionshei
sinr
ightnow.
TheMwangi
’
slov
ehersomuchand
t
heywoul
dn’
thesi
tat
etot
akeherbacki
f
shewer
etosayshewantt
hem because
she’
snotget
ti
ngwhatsheget
sfr
om t
he
Mwangi
’
s.Youcan’
tut
terwor
dst
hat
dest
roy
sandex
pectpeopl
eto
under
standwheny
ousaysor
ry.
”Each
wor
dhesai
dbr
eaksmyhear
tint
otwoI
di
dn’
tknowI
’
mthi
shor
ri
ble.
“
I’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
treal
i
zej
usthowbadI
am.Iwasangr
yandI
….”Ibur
sti
nto
t
ear
s
“
Youar
enotbadBongay
ouj
ustneedt
o
l
ear
ntocont
rol
youranger
,youhav
etoo
muchangerandIunder
standwhy
.
Someoft
het
hingsy
oucan’
trunaway
f
rom t
hem f
orev
eratsomepoi
nty
ou
hav
etof
acet
hem.Youar
eangr
yabout
ev
ery
thi
ngt
hathappenedi
nyourl
i
febut
y
ouar
epour
ingy
ourangert
othewr
ong
per
son,
youronl
ydaught
erwhoi
s
i
nnocenti
nev
ery
thi
ngt
hathappenedi
n
y
ourl
i
fe.Youneedpr
ofessi
onal
hel
pto
deal
wit
hyourangerandl
ear
ntol
eti
t
go.Asl
ongasy
ouar
ehar
bour
ingt
his
angert
her
e’sgoi
ngt
obemor
edamage
especi
all
ybet
weeny
ouandMi
ra.Idon’
t
t
hinky
ouwantt
olosey
ouronl
y
daught
er.St
opact
ingt
oughy
ouar
enot
ki
l
li
ngy
our
sel
fonl
ybuty
ourl
ovesone
aswel
lespeci
all
yyourdaught
er,
accept
pr
ofessi
onal
hel
pBonga.Thent
her
e’s
y
oural
cohol
i
sm,
Idon’
twantt
osayI
knowwhaty
ouar
egoi
ngt
hrough
becauseIhav
enev
erbeenanal
cohol
i
c
butIneedy
out
othi
nkaboutwhati
twi
l
l
doy
out
oyourl
ovesonewheny
oudi
e
orgetsi
ck.Whati
twoul
ddot
oMi
ra,
to
y
ourmom,
togr
anddaught
er,
toZo,
to
me?Thenex
tti
mey
out
hinkabout
dr
inki
ngal
cohol
thi
nkaboutuspl
ease.
Wel
ovey
ouBongaandwedon’
twantt
o
l
osey
oupl
easedon’
trobusy
our
sel
f.I
seemy
sel
fwi
thnooneel
sebuty
oui
n
t
hef
utur
e.Iwantgr
owol
dwi
thy
ou
Bonga.Youar
eev
ery
thi
ngandmor
eI
wanti
nawoman,
don’
tal
l
owmet
o
i
nvestsomuchi
nyout
henl
osey
ou
pr
emat
urel
yIbegy
ou.That
’swi
l
lki
l
lme
bey
ondcanev
eni
magi
ne”Thel
astl
i
ne
comesoutasawhi
sper
.It
’sbr
ingsme
somuchpai
nthatIhav
ebeenahor
ri
ble
mot
herandunf
airt
othepeopl
ethatI
l
ove.Ibur
ymyheadonhi
sneckandcr
y
ashecomf
ort
sme
“
Shhhdon’
tcr
ypl
easej
ustl
etmebe
t
her
efory
oupl
ease,
leanonmeandl
et
mehol
dyourhandt
hrought
hisj
our
neyI
pr
omi
seIwon’
tlety
ouf
all
.It
’snotgoi
ng
t
obeeasybuti
twi
l
lwor
thi
t.I
’
m her
efor
y
oumyj
aanandI
’
m nev
erl
ett
ingy
ou
go”

-
“
BabyI
’
m sor
ry”Het
ri
est
ohol
dmebutI
y
ankhi
shandsof
f.I
’
m cr
ying
hy
ster
ical
l
yit
’shur
tdeepdowni
nmy
hear
t.Thi
sisoneoft
het
hingsIcoul
dn’
t
hadev
ent
houghtof
.It
houghtt
heyhav
e
anuncl
eandni
ecer
elat
ionshi
p.Ishoul
d
behappyr
ightnowt
hatmybestf
ri
end
i
sbackhomeandsaf
ebutno,
Iam her
e
hur
ti
ng.
“
Whydi
dn’
tyout
ell
met
haty
ouand
Mi
rahadsex
?”Iwi
pemyt
ear
s
v
igor
ousl
yIdemandanswer
snow.Thi
s
doesn’
tmakesenseMi
rawoul
dhav
e
t
oldme.
“
Idi
dn’
tthi
nki
twasi
mpor
tant
”Ishef
or
r
eal
“
Wowr
eal
l
y!Youscr
ewedmybest
f
ri
endSoxandy
out
hinkt
hatwasnot
i
mpor
tantt
otel
lme!
!”
“
Comeonbaby
,whathappened
bet
weenMi
raandIwasaonceof
fthi
ng,
i
t'
snotl
i
kewewer
einar
elat
ionshi
p”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
haty
oust
il
ldon’
tsee
whyy
oushoul
dhav
etol
dme!You
shoul
dhav
egi
venmeachancet
o
deci
def
ormy
sel
fwhet
herIwantt
obe
wi
thy
ouornotev
enaf
tery
ouscr
ewed
mybestf
ri
end!GoshSoxMi
rai
sli
kea
si
stert
omet
his,
yousl
eptwi
thmybest
f
ri
endandnev
ersawaneedf
ormet
o
knowaboutt
hat
?”
“
Guguy
ounev
ery
out
oldmewhoy
ou
sl
eptwi
thandwhatnot
…”Icuthi
m of
ff
“
It
’snott
hesamedammi
t!Tel
lmehow
y
ou'
dfeel
ify
ouwer
etof
indoutt
hatI
sl
eptwi
thMt
hokobef
orewedat
edandI
nev
ert
oldy
ouhuh?
”Hel
ooksatmeand
br
usheshi
sheadi
nfr
ust
rat
ion.Mt
hoko
i
shi
sbestf
ri
endi
nfactt
heyar
eli
ke
br
other
s.He’
stheonewhoal
sohel
ped
hi
m st
artt
ohi
spubandgr
il
landcar
wash.Theyhav
ethesamer
elat
ionshi
pI
hav
ewi
thMi
ra.
“
Exact
lySoxy
ouar
esosel
fi
sh!Nowshe
hasadaught
erwi
thy
ou,
howsi
cki
sthat
?
I
twassupposedt
obemewhowi
l
lcar
ry
y
ourof
fspr
ingsnotherwhyungenz
a
kanj
eSox
”Ibur
sti
ntoal
oudsob.
“
Ngi
yax
oli
sast
handwasami
”(I
’
m sor
ry
myl
ove)Hewr
apshi
sar
msar
oundme
“
Don’
ttouchme!Leav
emeal
one!
”
“
Baby
…”
“
Tel
lmehowandwhendi
dthi
s
happened?
”
“
Don’
tdot
hist
oyour
sel
f”
“
Idemandanswer
s,ev
erysi
ngl
edet
ail
!”
Hesi
ghsheav
il
yandt
ell
smewhat
happened.I
t’
sex
act
lyt
hedayMi
ra
di
sappear
edsoshecoul
dn'
thav
ebeen
abl
etot
ell
me.
“
Howwasi
t?”
“
Hay
iyouar
eex
tranow,
it’
snotl
i
keI
cheat
edony
ou”
“
Doy
oul
oveher
?”Hedoesn’
trepl
y,I
’
m
notsur
eifhehear
dmeorwhat
?Il
ook
upathi
m andourey
esmeet
.OhmyGod
hedoes!Ey
esnev
erl
i
e!
“
You.
.y
..
.y
oul
oveherSox
?”
“
Ilov
edherbutnowIl
ovey
ou”Ishake
myheadno,
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
his.
“
Youar
ely
ingSox
”
“
IswearbabyIl
ovey
ouandMi
ral
oves
Lwandl
enotme”
“
Doessheknow?
”
“
Iconf
essedmyf
eel
i
ngsaf
terunhm
y
eah”
“
Whyy
ounev
ert
ri
edt
omakeamov
eon
her
,Imeannoonecoul
dn’
thav
enot
iced
t
haty
oul
oveherr
omant
ical
l
y.Ial
way
s
sawanuncl
ewhol
oveshi
sni
ece”
“
Hermot
herdi
dn’
twantmet
out
hi“
Im
notamanofherdaught
er’
scal
i
ber
”
becauseI
’
m aj
ustadr
iver
”Hi
svoi
cei
s
l
acedwi
thpai
n,Inev
ert
houghtmom
Bongai
soneoft
hosewhounder
mines
peopl
e.I
t’
sreal
l
yunl
i
keher
“
Sowhathappensnow?Wher
edowego
onf
rom her
e?Nowt
haty
ouhav
eachi
l
d
wi
thherdaught
er”
“
I’
m notgoi
ngt
oal
l
owhert
odenyme
mydaught
er.Mr
sKi
sful
lofnonsense
andIhav
etol
erat
edherenoughnow!
”
“
Whataboutus?
”
“
Not
hingi
sgoi
ngt
ochangebet
weenus
Gugu.Il
ovey
ouandIst
il
lwantt
omar
ry
y
ou”Iwi
sht
hatcanmakemehappy
“
Whati
fMi
rawant
syounow,
Imean
whati
fshehashopest
haty
oucoul
dtr
y
t
hingsoutandbeaf
ami
l
y.”
“
Mir
alov
esLwandl
e”
“
Whati
fshel
ovesy
ounow,
Imeany
ou
t
wohav
eadaught
ernow.Somet
hing
t
hatwi
l
lbi
ndy
out
wof
orev
er”Hel
ooks
atmeandI
t’
sseemsl
i
kewor
dsar
e
f
all
i
nghi
m andt
her
e’st
heanswerr
ight
t
her
einhi
sey
es.If
eel
myhear
t
shat
ter
ingi
npi
ecesandt
ear
sst
ream
downmyf
ace
“
YouknowwhatSoxwhat
evert
hiswas,
i
t’
sov
er!I
t’
scl
earnowt
haty
ouwant
ed
t
obewi
thmet
ofi
l
lthatl
ongi
ngy
ouhad
f
orMi
ra”
“
Nobaby
,that
’snott
rue!
”
“
Her
etakey
ourr
ing!
”It
akei
tof
fandhi
t
hi
m wi
thi
t.Youknowt
hehar
destpar
t
aboutal
lthi
sist
hatt
heset
wopeopl
e
meanssomucht
omeandt
heyar
ethe
onl
yfami
l
yIhav
enowsi
ncemi
ne
di
sownedme.Igetupandgot
othe
bedr
oom t
ogetdr
essedandpackmy
cl
othest
henIr
ememberev
ent
hese
cl
otheswer
eboughtbyhi
m soIhav
e
not
hing.
“
Babypl
easedon’
tleav
eme,
Ilov
eyou
Gugu”t
hose3wor
dcomi
ngf
rom hi
s
mout
hmel
tedmyhear
tjustmi
nut
esago
butnowt
heyar
emeani
ngl
ess.Het
ri
es
t
ost
opmebutIpushhi
m andmakemy
wayoutwi
tht
ear
sst
reami
ngdownmy
f
ace.Idon’
tknowwher
eam Igoi
ng,
I
nev
ermadeaf
ri
endev
enatv
arsi
ty.I
t
ri
edbutt
heywer
enotl
i
keMi
rasoI
st
oppedseeki
ngf
orf
ri
endshi
p.Inev
er
t
houghtmyr
elat
ionshi
pwi
thSoxcoul
d
endespeci
all
yli
ket
his.Il
ovehi
m so
muchandIdon’
tseemy
sel
fsur
viv
ing
wi
thouthi
m butIguesssuchi
sli
fe.

Ican’
tst
opsmi
l
ingf
rom eart
oearwhen
It
hinkoft
hedayIhadwi
thcuddl
es
cakest
oday
.WhenI
’
m wi
thhi
mit
’sf
eel
s
l
i
ket
hewor
ldi
sonast
andst
il
landi
t’
s
j
ustmeandhi
m ex
ist
ing.It
houghtIwas
st
il
langr
yathi
m butaf
terwet
alkedI
r
eal
i
zeIf
orgav
ehi
mlongt
imeagoand
seei
nghi
m agai
nev
okedt
hef
eel
i
ngsI
t
houghtsomehowdi
ed.GoshIl
ovet
hat
Nkosi
boyi
t’
shur
tst
hatIcan’
thav
ehi
m
backnow.HowdoImov
eonf
rom t
his?
HowdoIcont
inuel
i
vingwi
thouthi
m,
knowi
ngt
hathe’
sal
lIwant
?Apar
tof
mewanthi
mtost
ayawayf
rom mebut
anot
herpar
tyear
nsf
orhi
m mor
ethan
any
thi
ngi
nthi
swor
ld.Iy
ear
nforhi
s
pr
esencei
nmyl
i
fe,
hist
ouch,
hiski
sses
ohhi
ski
ssessetmysoul
wit
hfi
re,
I
y
ear
nforhi
sdi
ck,
thent
her
eshi
sar
ms
mysaf
eheav
enonear
th.Iknowi
t’
sso
wr
ongt
oyear
nsomeoneel
seboy
fri
end
butIj
ustcan’
thel
pit
.Inev
erst
opped
l
ovi
nghi
m andIknowt
hatasl
ongashe
doesn’
tst
opseei
ngmeIwon’
tresi
st
hi
m.I
m scar
edIwi
l
lgi
vemyal
ltohi
m
onceagai
nandgethur
tagai
n.Hesai
d
hel
oveshi
sgi
rlsowhati
shedoi
ngwi
th
me?Whydoesn’
thewantt
ost
ayaway
f
rom me?Whydoeshesayhest
il
ll
oves
mewher
eashehassomeonei
nhi
sli
fe?
Orhewantt
owar
mshi
swaybet
ween
myl
egs?Hemi
ssest
hebl
i
ndgi
rl
’s
pussy
?Isn’
tthatwhathewant
edf
rom
t
hebegi
nni
ng?St
opi
tMi
ray
oul
osey
our
mi
nd!Igr
oani
nfr
ust
rat
ion,
hest
il
l
makesmywor
ldupsi
dedownandIhat
e
t
hatef
fecthehasonme.Ihav
eal
ot
goi
ngonr
ightnowbuther
eIam
t
hinki
ngaboutaboy
.Mymom wentt
o
mal
umeSoxandI
’
m wonder
ingwhatdi
d
shedot
ohi
m.Thewayshewasso
angr
yandI
’
m scar
edmal
umeSoxwi
l
l
hat
emef
orkeepi
nghi
sdaught
eraway
f
rom hi
mforal
most4y
ear
s.Ihav
e
wi
tnessedhowhel
oveshi
sbr
other
’s
chi
l
dren.It
houghtcomi
ngbackhome
wi
l
lbr
ingmesomepeaceofmi
ndand
hel
pmet
oheal
buti
t’
sseemsl
i
kei
twi
l
l
bepr
obl
emsaf
terpr
obl
ems.Howdi
dI
gether
evel
e?Ihat
egr
owi
ngupy
az.The
smel
lofherpeonyandmandar
inor
ange
f
il
lsmynost
ri
lsassheenv
elopesmy
t
inybody
.Ii
nhal
eitdeepl
yand
somehowIf
eel
atpeace.
“
I’
m sor
rysweet
hear
t,I
'
mreal
l
ysor
ry”
“
It
’sokaymom Iunder
stand…”
“
HayMi
rast
opi
t!Pl
easest
op
under
standi
ngbul
l
shi
t!I
’
m badamot
her
t
oyouandIdon’
tdeser
vey
ou”
“
Nomommydon’
tsayt
hatpl
ease,
I
madeami
stake.
.”
“
Exact
lyy
oumadeami
stakewho
doesn’
tmakemi
stakeshuh?I
’
m sor
ry
sweet
hear
tandIknowt
haty
ouar
e
get
ti
ngt
ir
edofmy“
sor
ri
es”
.Youknow
babywheny
ouar
eapar
entandy
our
chi
l
drenmakewr
ongchoi
cesi
nthei
r
l
i
vesy
ouf
eel
li
key
ouf
ail
edt
hem.Iwant
t
hebestl
i
fecanof
fery
oumychi
l
dand
seei
ngy
oumaki
ngt
hesamemi
stakesI
madeki
l
lsmebey
ond.If
eel
int
ense
angerwhenIseey
oumaki
ngt
heex
act
samemi
stakesImadei
nmyl
i
fe
becauset
heyar
ether
easonwear
eher
e.
I
’
m angr
yatmy
sel
ffort
hechoi
cesI
madei
nmyl
i
fe.Regr
etsar
ehaunt
ing
meev
erysi
ngl
edayhadI
..
.shoul
dI.
..
I
coul
dhav
ebutwoul
dthathel
p?Noy
ou
knowIoncehadadr
eam t
obea
doct
or?
”
“
No”
“
Zoi
sdef
ini
tel
ythewomanIt
houghtI
woul
dbeoneday
.Bei
ngadoct
or,
hav
e
al
ovel
yhusbandwi
thbeaut
if
ulki
dsbut
t
hechoi
cesImadel
edmeher
e.I
ma
wi
dowofanabusi
vehusband.Ican’
t
ev
enenj
oyt
hel
uxur
yli
fehel
eftf
orme
wi
thoutf
eel
i
nggui
l
ty.Thi
sli
fei
snot
whatIwantf
ory
oubaby
,Iwanty
out
o
gooutt
her
eandshi
nei
nyourmusi
c
car
eer
.Youknow,
onet
hingy
oushoul
d
knowaboutmeni
sthatt
heyar
ever
y
i
nti
midat
edbyawomanwhoi
s
i
ndependenty
ett
heyf
indi
tsex
y.I
t’
sin
t
hei
rDNAt
hatt
heywantt
ofeel
the
powerofbei
ngamanandwheny
ou
gi
vet
hem t
hatpowert
odi
ctat
eyout
hey
wi
l
lnev
err
especty
ou.Idon’
twi
shf
or
y
out
obel
i
kemeanddependont
he
manbecauseonedayhewi
l
lremi
ndy
ou
whatr
ubbi
shy
ouwer
ebef
orehepi
cked
y
ouupandmadey
ou.Ibecomeangr
yat
y
ouwhenIseey
oumaki
ngt
hesame
choi
cesImadebecauseIdon’
twanty
ou
t
obel
i
keme.Inev
erwant
edy
out
ohav
e
achi
l
datt
heageof23y
ear
sjustl
i
ke
me.Iwantgr
andchi
l
drenal
otoft
hem
sot
hatt
heywi
l
ltaket
urnst
otakecar
e
ofmewhenI
’
m ol
d”Icanhearasmi
l
ein
herv
oice
“
ButIwant
edy
out
omakesomet
hingof
y
our
sel
ffi
rst
,getmar
ri
edt
henhav
e
chi
l
dren.Il
ovedLwandl
efory
ou
becausey
out
woar
ethesameage,
you
wantt
hesamet
hingsokaymay
benot
t
hesamet
hingsex
act
lybutwhatI
’
m
t
ryi
ngt
osayi
sthaty
ourdr
eams
ci
rcul
atesar
oundy
ouragegr
oupunl
i
ke
Soxwho’
sal
readygoi
ngonf
orhi
s
t
hir
ti
es,
ofcour
sey
ourdr
eamswi
l
l
cl
utch.He’
satt
her
ightaget
ohav
ea
chi
l
dwher
easy
ouar
est
il
lyoung.I
al
way
sknewt
hathel
ovesy
oubutI
coul
dn’
tal
l
owhi
mtodat
eyou.Ican’
t
hel
pbutf
eel
het
ookadv
ant
ageofy
ou
anddi
dn’
tev
enbuyy
oumor
ningaf
ter
pi
l
ls.I
tfeel
sli
kei
tar
eal
tri
ck,
li
kei
twas
hi
spl
ant
omakey
oupr
egnant
.”
“
Idon’
tthi
nkso,
mal
umeSoxi
sagood
guyandheconf
essedhi
sfeel
i
ngsf
or
me.Idi
dn’
tknowt
haty
ouknew”
“
Ify
ousayhe’
sagoodguy
,whyhedi
d
f
ucky
oui
nst
eadofcomf
ort
ingy
ou?He
t
ookadv
ant
ageofy
ourv
ulner
abi
l
ityt
hat
washi
schancet
oshowhi
s“l
ove”not
f
ucky
oupr
egnant
.”
“
Butst
il
li
tdoesn’
tmakehi
m abadguy
mom.Iguessi
twasamomentof
weaknessf
orbot
hofus”
“
Exact
lyi
nkanukonj
eqhahenev
erl
oved
y
ou.If
ail
tounder
standhowcanhe
engageGuguy
ourbestf
ri
endaf
terhe
f
uckedy
ouandhenev
ert
oldGugu
abouti
t?”Igaspwi
thshock
“
Mal
umeSoxi
sengagedt
oGugu?
”
“
Yest
heyar
est
ayi
ngt
oget
heract
ual
l
y
herf
atherdi
sownedher
.”
“
WowI
’
m sur
pri
sedt
hoset
wonev
ergot
al
ong,
theywer
eal
way
soneachot
her
’s
t
hroat
s”
“
Whoknowsmay
behedi
dn’
twanty
ou
t
onot
icesot
hathecant
akeadv
ant
age
ofy
ouoneday
”
“
Howdi
dGugut
aket
henewsofme
hav
ingachi
l
dwi
thherf
iancé”
“
She’
shur
tMi
ra,
uSoxuy
ani
xabani
sa.
Hecoul
dhav
eatl
eastt
oldhert
hen
Guguwoul
dhav
econt
inuewi
tht
hei
r
r
elat
ionshi
pknowi
ng.Ican’
timagi
ne
howdoesshef
eel
s”I
’
m bey
ondhur
t
howcanmal
umeSoxdot
his?It
rust
ed
hi
m andwhenheconf
essedt
hathe
l
ovedmeIbel
i
evedhi
mthenhegoes
andengagemybestf
ri
end?I
tsbet
teri
f
i
t’
ssomeoneel
senotGugu,
shel
i
kea
si
stert
ome.Iknowt
hisi
sgoi
ngt
o
af
fectourf
ri
endshi
poht
hix
oher
e’s
anot
herpr
obl
em addi
ngont
opoft
he
onesIal
readyhav
e.
“
Howcoul
dhemama?
”Isaywi
tht
ear
s
r
oll
i
ngdownmyf
ace.Il
oveGuguandI
can’
tloseher
.
“
I’
m sor
rybabyf
rom t
hedeepestofmy
hear
t.Iwanty
out
oknowt
hatIl
ovemy
gr
anddaught
ery
ezwamyr
eact
ion
ear
li
erdoesn’
tmeanIdon’
tlov
eher
.”Oh
howIwant
edt
oheart
hatsobad
“
Real
l
yMama”
“
YesbabyIwassoangr
yandIdeal
t
wi
tht
hesi
tuat
ionwr
ong.I
’
m sor
ryf
or
sl
appi
ngaty
ouIdi
dn’
tmeant
o.I
’
m
pour
ingmyangerony
ouandIhat
e
my
sel
ffort
hat
.”
“
Youkeepsay
ingt
hatImakey
ouangr
y
whenImaket
hesamechoi
cest
haty
ou
madedoest
hatmeany
ouanddadwer
e
onceof
fthi
ngt
hat
’swhyy
ounev
er
t
alkedabouthi
m?”Shesi
ghsheav
il
y
andex
plai
nev
ery
thi
ngf
rom me.I
’
m
st
unnedt
ospeaksoI
’
m achi
l
dwhowas
concei
vedt
hroughr
evenge.
“
I’
m notpr
oudofwhatIdi
dbaby
”I’
m
t
ryi
ngt
osaysomet
hingbutwor
dsar
e
f
ail
i
ngme
“
Mir
apl
easesaysomet
hingIknowI
’
ma
hor
ri
bleper
son”
“
Thi
sist
oomucht
otakemom,
you
ki
l
ledy
oursi
ster
”
“
Idi
dn’
tki
l
lheri
twasahear
tat
tack”
“
Causedbyy
oumama,
hadshenot
f
oundy
ouandherhusbandshewoul
d
beal
i
ve”
“
IknowokayIknow”
“
ohmyGodt
hisi
stoomuch”
“
Ther
e’ssomet
hingel
se.
..
umhy
our
f
atherhe’
snotdeadhe’
sal
i
veIl
i
edt
o
y
oubecauseIknewy
ouwoul
dwantt
o
f
indhi
m buthenev
erl
ovedus.WhenI
t
oldhi
m abouty
ouhedi
dn’
twant
any
thi
ngt
odowi
thusandhebl
amed
mef
ort
hedeat
hofmysi
sterasi
fI
f
orcedhi
mtosl
eepwi
thme.
”Goshwho
i
sthi
swoman!Iwi
ggl
emy
sel
foutofher
embr
ace
“
Jesusmamay
oul
i
edt
omef
or23
y
ear
s!”
“
I’
m sor
rybaby
…”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evey
ou,
howcoul
dyoul
et
mel
i
veal
i
e!”
“
Hedi
dn’
twanty
ouMi
ra!
”
“
Butt
hatdoesn’
tmeany
oushoul
dli
eto
me!Youshoul
d’v
etol
dmet
hathe’
s
al
i
vemama!Imour
nedt
hatmanf
or23
y
ear
sofmyl
i
fekant
ihe’
sal
i
ve!
”
“
Ngi
yax
oli
sast
handwasami
”shecr
ies
“
Pleasegi
vemesomespaceIwantt
o
beal
one”
“
Baby
…”
“
Nomamay
ouwat
chedmehur
ti
ngf
ora
mant
hatnev
erl
ovedme,
youwat
ched
memour
ningamant
hatdeni
edme
bef
oreIwasev
enbor
n,y
ouwat
chedme
whi
ningaboutamant
hatnev
erdi
edj
ust
t
opr
otecty
ourdi
rt
ysecr
ets.Ar
eyou
ev
enmymot
her
?”
“
Ofcour
sebaby
…”
“
CanIbeal
onepl
ease”
“
Mir
acl
e…”
“
Outpl
easeIj
ustneedt
orest
”
“
Ilov
eyou”Sheki
ssesmyl
i
psand
wal
ksout
.Themomentsheshutt
he
doorIcr
ymyey
ebal
l
sout
.Howcoul
d
shedot
hist
ome?Howcanshel
i
e
aboutsomet
hinghugel
i
ket
his?I
t’
s
seem l
i
keev
ery
onear
oundmei
s
decei
vi
ngme.Theyar
epl
ayi
ngwi
thmy
f
eel
i
ngsl
i
keI
’
m nothumanatal
l
.Noone
seemst
ocar
ethatIhur
ttooandwhat
conf
usesmei
sthatal
loft
hem cl
aimt
o
l
ovemebutt
hei
rint
ent
ionst
urnoutt
o
beot
her
wise.I
sitbecauseI
’
m bl
i
ndand
t
heyseeat
oyt
opl
aywi
thwhent
hey
seeme?
HappyBi
rt
hdayThandi
weNt
uli
&Jani
ce
TanakaKaz
enga

CHAPTER42
Ourmi
ndsar
ever
ypower
ful
butcanbe
easi
l
ybef
ool
ed.Lear
ningt
oli
vewi
thout
mydol
l
facewast
hedeci
siont
hathadt
o
bemadeandsomehowIf
oundmy
sel
f
sosur
ethatIhav
emov
edonf
rom her
butwhenmom t
oldmemal
umef
ound
herl
astni
ghtIcoul
dn’
twai
tfort
odayt
o
comeal
readysot
hatIcanseeher
.The
momentIsawhert
odayIj
ustknewt
hat
shehasnev
erv
acat
edmyhear
t.Iwas
soangr
ywhenSnot
oldherabout
Ay
andaIwant
edt
otel
lhermy
sel
f.
Lenganei
yaphaphasomet
imes.If
eel
l
i
keIhav
en’
tbeent
hishappyi
nmyl
i
fe
ev
ersi
nceDol
l
facedi
sappear
ed.
Spendi
ngt
imewi
thhert
odaywokeup
deepf
eel
i
ngsIal
way
skeptatt
heback
ofmi
nd.ThewayI
’
m sohappyIcanf
eel
j
oywi
thi
nthedept
hofmyhear
t.I
’
m
act
ual
l
ydr
ivi
ngt
omyuncl
e’
shouseI
f
indhi
m si
tt
ingont
hecouchonl
yinhi
s
pant
s.
“
Uncl
ewhat
’swr
ong”IsaywhenInot
ice
sweatandaf
rownpl
ast
eredonhi
sface
“
Hel
l
otoy
out
ooboy
”Iseebl
oodonhi
s
bandaget
hat
’swr
appedonhi
s
abdomen
“
Mal
umei
sitnor
mal
fory
ourwoundst
o
bl
eed?
”Isi
tnex
ttohi
m
“
Ijusthadabi
tofex
erci
set
oday
”
“
Butt
hedoct
orsai
dyoumustt
akei
t
easymay
beweshoul
dgot
othe
hospi
tal
”
“
IjusthadmymedsIwi
l
lbef
ine”
“
Ithoughty
ouar
enotsupposedt
o
ex
erci
seatal
l
”
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”
“
Hawumal
umesi
ncewhendoIneeda
r
easont
oseeI
mpi
ntshi
yami
yegaz
i”He
chuckl
es
“
Whatdoy
ouwantnt
wanas”
“
Oucht
hat
’shur
t”
“
Iknowy
ouphel
a”
“
Ijustwantt
othanky
ouf
rom t
he
deepestofmyhear
tforf
indi
ngMi
ra.
Ev
ent
houghi
ttooky
ear
sand3bul
l
ets
woundsi
nyourbodybutIal
way
sknewI
cancountony
ou.Youar
eaher
o
mpi
ntshi
yami
”Hesmi
l
esf
aint
ly
“
Ist
il
lfeel
hor
ri
bley
ouknowImeanhad
Inotusedhernoneoft
hiswoul
dhav
e
happened.Thepoorchi
l
dsepar
ated
wi
thhermom f
or4y
ear
sandshe
t
houghtshe’
sdead.Thepai
nshewent
t
hrough,
sti
l
lgoi
ngt
hroughi
t’
sbecause
ofme.
”Hi
svoi
cei
slacedwi
thpai
n
“
Buty
ouf
oundhermal
umeandy
ouar
e
nott
heonewhokeptherawayf
rom her
mot
heri
t’
sSpi
der
.Youshoul
dbepr
oud
ofy
our
sel
fthatul
ti
mat
elyy
ouf
ound
her
.”
“
Gui
l
tiseat
ingmeev
erysi
ngl
eday
,my
hear
tbr
eaksev
eryt
imeIseeBonga
dr
owni
ngher
sel
fint
oal
cohol
because
ofwhatIdi
d.I
t’
sbr
eaksmyhear
tthat
Mi
rai
ssi
nki
ngi
ntodepr
essi
onbecause
ofme.Al
loft
hisst
art
edwi
thme
Lwandl
e.”Myhear
tachesf
orhi
m.
“
Mom Bongaf
orgav
eyour
ight
?”
“
Yesandshe’
ssohappyt
hatMi
rai
s
back.Shesai
dI’
m herher
o”Iseea
smi
l
etugst
hecor
ner
sofhi
sli
psmmh
t
hat
’ssmi
l
e.
“
Theni
tst
imet
ofor
giv
eyour
sel
ftoo
uncl
e.I
t’
shasbeenhar
dforal
lusbut
I
t’
sti
mewemov
eon.Noonei
sper
fect
somet
imeswemakedeci
sionst
hinki
ng
t
heyar
ebestonl
ytof
indoutt
heyar
e
wor
st.I
fmom Bongaf
orgav
eyout
hen
y
oushoul
dfor
giv
eyour
sel
f”
“
Mydomkophasbecomesosmar
t”I
punchhi
sshoul
dercausi
nghi
mto
gi
ggl
e.
“
Sowhat
’sgoi
ngonv
elebet
weeny
ou
andmom Bonga?
”
“
Whatdoy
oumean?
”Il
augh
“
Arey
our
eal
l
ygoi
ngt
oactl
i
key
oudon’
t
knowwhatImean”
“
AyIdon’
tknowwhaty
ouar
etal
ki
ng
aboutwhatIwannaknowhowdoy
ou
f
eel
aboutMi
ra’
sret
urn?
”
“
I’
m mor
ethenhappymal
umeIhada
l
ovel
ydaywi
thhert
oday
”Ismi
l
e
t
hinki
ngaboutawonder
ful
dayIhad
wi
thmydol
l
face”
“
That
’ssmi
l
eri
ghtt
her
esay
sal
ot
Lwandl
epl
easedon’
ttel
lmey
oust
il
l
l
oveMi
ra”
“
Inev
erst
oppedl
ovi
nghermal
ume”
“
Buty
oumov
edon”
“
Imov
edonbutInev
erst
oppedl
ovi
ng
her
”
“
Hai
boLwandl
ewhataboutAy
anda?
”
“
Ilov
eher
”Heshakeshi
sheadi
n
di
sbel
i
ef
“
Youcantl
ovet
wogi
rl
sLwandl
e”
“
Ilov
eAy
andabutMi
raownsmysoul
mal
ume”
“
Iaskedy
ouLwandl
eify
ou’
resur
e
aboutmov
ingonandy
ousai
dyesso
pl
easest
ayawayf
rom Mi
ra,
she’
s
f
ight
ingdepr
essi
onasi
tisshedoesn’
t
needdr
amast
ickt
oAy
andat
hepoorgi
rl
l
ovesy
ou”
“
I’
m sor
rymal
umebutIwon’
tst
ayaway
f
rom Mi
ra”
“
Youseehowsel
fi
shy
ouar
e!Youonl
y
car
eabouty
our
sel
fonl
ywhatabout
Ay
andahowi
twi
l
lmakeherf
eel
?St
ay
awayf
rom Mi
radoy
ouhearme?
”
“
Whatt
hef
ucki
syourpr
obl
em nowy
ou
knowMi
rameanst
hewor
ldt
omeIcant
st
ayawayf
rom her
!”
“
Heyboyf
ir
stofal
ldon’
ttal
ktomel
i
ke
I
’
myourf
ri
endandsecondl
yyouchose
t
omov
eonsodeal
wit
hyourchoi
ce!
Dar
egetnearMi
raIwi
l
lgr
atey
ourbal
l
s
boy
!”
“
Whodi
edandmadey
ouMi
ra’
sfat
her
?”
“
Ohj
ustbecauseshehasnof
atheri
t’
s
al
ri
ghtf
ory
out
opl
aywi
thherhear
t?”
“
Whosai
dIwi
l
lpl
aywi
thherhear
t?”
“
Youar
econf
usedLwandl
elwenkosi
you
canthav
etwogi
rl
fr
iends!Youchose
Ay
andaangi
thi
phumanj
ekuMi
ra!
”Iget
upandl
eav
ewi
thoutawor
daf
tert
hat
.
I
’
mfumi
ngwi
thanger
.Iunder
stand
whathe’
ssay
ingbuthedoesn’
thav
eto
t
hreat
enmeandi
fhet
hinksI
’
mreal
l
y
goi
ngt
ost
ayawayf
rom Mi
rahe’
scr
azy
.
ThemomentsheopensherdoorI
dev
ourherl
i
psandwhi
skherof
ffr
om
t
hef
looral
l
owi
nghert
owr
apherl
egs
ar
oundwai
st
“
Lwandl
e”shesay
sbet
weent
heki
ss.I
pr
essheragai
nstt
hewal
l
.
“
Imi
ssy
ou”She’
swear
ingadr
esswhi
ch
makesi
teasyf
orme.Isl
i
deherpant
ies
asi
deandr
ubhercl
i
t
“
Imi
ssy
out
oo”Shesay
sbi
ti
ngher
l
owerl
i
p.Ikeepr
ubbi
nghercl
i
tunt
il
she’
swet
.Iunbuckl
emybel
tandt
ake
outmyhar
dcockt
henent
erhersl
owl
y
“
AhhhLwandl
e”Shemoans,
Ist
art
mov
ing,
picki
ngupmypace.
“
Shi
t!
”Igr
oanasIpl
ungedeepi
ntoher
,
shescr
eamsur
gingmet
opoundher
har
der
,rel
easi
ngmyf
rust
rat
ions.We
hadourt
hir
droundi
nherbedr
oom.
“
Damn!
”Isaycol
l
apsi
ngont
opofher
t
ryi
ngcat
chmybr
eat
h.
“
Ilov
eyouLwandl
elwami
”
“
Ilov
eyout
ooYay
awami
”
-

Bei
ngapar
entbr
ingsgr
eatj
oyand
happi
nessbutt
her
ear
echal
l
engesas
wel
l
.Mi
rahasal
way
sbeent
heonl
y
per
sonIl
i
vef
or,
nur
tur
ingherand
wat
chi
nghergr
owdev
elopi
ngi
ntoher
uni
queper
sonhasgi
venameani
ngand
pur
posei
nmyl
i
fe.Ther
ear
edeci
sions
i
nli
fewet
akeaspar
ent
stopr
otectour
chi
l
dren.It
houghti
twasbet
terf
orher
t
oknowt
hatherf
atherdi
edi
nst
eadof
knowi
ngt
hathedoesn’
twantherbuti
t’
s
seemsl
i
keImadeami
stakebymaki
ng
t
hatdeci
sion.“
Nomamay
ouwat
ched
mehur
ti
ngf
oramant
hatnev
erl
oved
me,
youwat
chedmemour
ningaman
t
hatdeni
edmebef
oreIwasev
enbor
n,
y
ouwat
chedmewhi
ningaboutaman
t
hatnev
erdi
ed”Thosewor
dsar
eri
ngi
ng
i
nmyear
sthepai
nlacedi
nherv
oice
t
ear
smyhear
tint
opi
eces.Ij
ustwant
ed
t
opr
otecther
,bei
ngapar
enti
shar
dit
’s
t
imel
i
ket
hisIwi
sht
her
ewasa
gui
debookt
opar
ent
hood.I
t’
sseem l
i
ke
ev
eryt
imeImakeadeci
siont
hinki
ngi
t’
s
bestf
ormydaught
eri
t’
stur
nsoutt
o
af
fecthermor
e.Si
gh!I
’
m br
oughtback
f
rom t
rancebymyr
ingi
ngphone.
“
K”
“
Snookums”Thewat
erwor
ksst
art
s
“
Heywhat
’swr
ong”concer
nisl
oudi
n
hi
svoi
ce
“
Shehat
esmeK”
“
Whohat
eyou?
”
“
Mir
a..
.shehat
esme”
“
Yout
oldhert
het
rut
h”Inodwi
thmy
headandIr
emembert
hathedoesn’
t
seeme
“
Yes”
“
Shedoesn’
that
eyoushe’
shur
ti
ngi
t
can’
tbeeasyf
orherf
indi
ngoutt
hather
f
atheri
sal
i
vewheny
out
oldherhe’
s
deadont
opoft
hathedoesn’
twanther
.
Pl
easedon’
tcr
ysnookumsshewi
l
l
comear
oundj
ustgi
vehert
ime”
“
Iheary
oubuti
t’
shur
tsKshedoesn’
t
ev
enwantt
osl
eepwi
thme.Idon’
twant
t
oloseherIf
eel
li
keshe’
ssl
i
ppi
ng
t
hroughmyf
inger
s”
“
Don’
tfor
gett
hatMi
rai
sgr
owi
ng,
she’
s
nol
ongera18y
earol
dnow.Youhav
eto
t
reatherasay
oungwomannotachi
l
d.
Justgi
vehert
imeshewi
l
lnev
erhat
e
y
ousnookums.Youar
eheronl
ymot
her
”
“
Iheary
ou”
“
Youdi
dagr
eatj
obbyr
aisi
nghernev
er
doubty
ourpar
ent
ingski
l
ls”
“
Youar
esay
ingt
hatt
omakemef
eel
bet
tery
ouknowIhav
en’
tbeendoi
ng
wel
l
”
“
Mist
akesar
eboundt
ohappenher
eand
t
her
eBonga.Youar
ehumant
oodon’
t
cr
uci
fyy
our
sel
fpl
easeanddon’
tfor
get
t
haty
oual
sohav
ethi
ngst
odeal
wit
hon
y
oursi
deandsomehowt
heyaf
fecty
our
deci
sionsandemot
ions”Heal
way
s
hav
eri
ghtwor
dst
osayatt
her
ightt
ime
“
Iheary
ou”
“
Pleasest
opcr
yingnowumumbi
mawukhal
a”Imanaget
ogi
ggl
e
“
Ngi
fuz
ewena!
”Hel
aughs
“
Justki
ddi
ngmyj
aany
ouar
ebeaut
if
ul
ev
enwheny
oucr
y”
“
That
’ssoundscor
ny”
“
Iknowbuti
t’
str
ue.
..
arey
oui
nbed
al
ready
?”
“
Yes”
“
Donty
ouwantmet
ocomeandt
uck
y
oui
n”
“
Youneedt
orestKy
oucan’
tbedr
ivi
ng
atni
ghtj
ustt
otuckmei
n”
“
What
’swr
ongwi
tht
hat
?”
“
Youar
est
il
lrecov
eri
ngsopl
easet
akei
t
easyokay
”
“
Yesma’
am.
”Ichuckl
e
“
K”
“
Snookums”
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Forwhat
?”
“
Forev
ery
thi
ngI
’
m wonder
inghowdi
dI
becomesol
uckyt
ohav
eamanl
i
key
ou
i
nmyl
i
fe.
”
“
Youdon’
thav
etot
hankmesnookums.
”
Wecont
inuewi
thourchatunt
ilwer
un
outofai
rt
ime.Thenex
tmor
ningIwake
upandpul
lar
obebef
oregoi
ngt
ocheck
onmydaught
er.She’
ssl
eepi
ng
peacef
ull
yherey
eli
dsar
eswol
l
enI
’
m
sur
eshecr
iedher
sel
ftosl
eep.Tal
ki
ng
wi
thKmademer
eal
i
zet
hatIhav
ebeen
cor
rect
ingt
hewr
ongchoi
cesImade
whenIwasy
oungt
hroughmydaught
er
whi
chi
swr
ong.Ineedt
olethergr
owon
herownandal
l
owhert
omakeherown
mi
stakesl
i
keanyot
herhumanaf
teral
l
t
hat
’showweal
ll
ear
n.
“
Ilov
eyousomuchmyMi
racl
e”Iki
ss
herf
oreheadandmakemywayout
.I
t
akeal
ongbat
handonceI
m done
moi
stur
izi
ngmy
sel
fIgetdr
essed.It
ake
mycarkey
sandphoneandheadout
.I
t
houghtIwi
l
lfi
ndmom i
ntheki
tchen
maki
ngbr
eakf
astorsi
ppi
ngont
ea.I
wr
it
eanot
eandpast
eitont
hef
ri
dge
t
henl
eav
e.I
’
m pl
ayi
nggospel
ont
he
wayt
ryi
ngt
oeasemyner
ves.It
akea
hugebr
eat
hebef
oremaki
ngmywayi
n.
Al
ley
esl
ayonmemaki
ngme
uncomf
ort
abl
e.Ihav
efi
nal
l
ydeci
dedt
o
j
oint
heAAmeet
ingsI
’
m soscar
edand
t
hest
aresonmear
enothel
ping.If
ind
my
sel
froot
edont
hedoor
cont
empl
ati
ngt
ogobackhomeorj
oin
t
hem.

I
’
m bat
tl
ingt
ounder
standhowcanmom
l
i
eaboutmyf
atherbei
ngdeadand
whatpai
nsmet
hemosti
sthatshe
wat
chedmehur
ti
ngandmour
ninga
mant
hatnev
erl
ovedme,
amant
hat
deni
edmebef
oreIwasev
enbor
n.I
wast
edmyt
ear
sonhi
mfornot
hing!She
hadnor
ightt
oli
etome.Iwon’
tli
eand
sayi
t’
sdoesn’
thur
tthatmyownf
ather
nev
erwant
edmebutsuchi
sli
fe.Ihav
e
beendoi
ngf
inewi
thouthi
m.Khumal
o
t
ri
edt
ofi
l
lthatv
oidandIwi
l
lfor
everbe
gr
atef
ult
ohi
mfort
hatev
ent
houghhe
changedaf
ter
war
ds.Thosef
ather
-
daught
ermoment
swehadIwi
l
lal
way
s
cher
isht
hem.I
’
m al
sogr
atef
ult
hathe
l
ovedmymom oratl
eastIt
houghtso
unl
i
kemysper
m donorwhonev
er
want
edus.Rhhaaasengat
hiangabol
a
amsendey
aznx
!

Mom gav
ememyphonel
astni
ghtandI
hav
ebeencont
empl
ati
ngt
ocal
lGugu
si
ncef
rom l
astni
ght
.If
eel
li
keweneed
t
otal
kandcl
eart
heai
r.It
akeahuge
br
eat
handcal
lherbutherphonesends
mest
rai
ghtt
ovoi
cemai
l
.Ihopeour
f
ri
endshi
pwi
l
lsur
viv
ethi
sIcan’
tlose
Gugushe’
smyonl
yfr
iend.I
’
mreal
l
y
madanddi
sappoi
ntedi
nMal
umeSox
butIwon’
tli
etomydaught
erl
i
kemy
mot
hershedeser
vest
oknowherf
ather
.
Iwantmydaught
ert
oknowt
hather
par
ent
slov
eshersomuchnomat
ter
howt
hesi
tuat
ioni
s.Iwonderhowdoes
shef
eel
shav
ingabl
i
ndmot
herbut
she’
sst
il
lababyI
’
m sur
eit
’snot
af
fect
ingherandIr
ememberwhenIt
old
hert
hatI
’
m bl
i
nd.Shesai
d“wewesi
o
ki
pof
umamaunay
ewez
akuona”(
you
ar
enotbl
i
ndmamay
oucansee)Idi
dn’
t
under
standwhatdi
dshemeanbutI
smi
l
edatherandgav
eherahug.
“
nakupenda,
mama”(
Ilov
eyoumama)I
swearmyhear
tmel
tedi
ntol
i
qui
dgol
d.
TodayI
’
m st
ruggl
i
ngt
ocomeoutoft
his
bedI
’
m soemot
ional
.Ihearaknockand
shout
s
“
Comei
n”Iheart
hedooropeni
ngt
hen
cl
osi
ng.
“
Mor
ningnunuz
a”
“
Mor
ningGogo”If
eel
mybedmov
ing
“
Howdi
dyousl
eep?
”
“
Notbad”
“
MrMwangi
isher
e”Ican’
thel
pasmi
l
e
t
hatbr
eaksacr
ossmyf
aceImi
ssmy
moonl
i
ghtIknowt
hatshe’
stheonl
yone
whocanl
i
ghtupt
hemood.
“
Okay
”Isl
i
deoutofbedandpul
lagown
t
hencal
loutf
orRocky
.Hecomest
ome
t
henwebot
hmakeourwayout
.
“
Daddy
”
“
Baby
”weshar
eahugIf
eehi
shear
t
beat
ingabnor
mal
l
yhar
d,somet
hingi
s
notr
ight
“
Babani
wapi
Kamar
ia?
”(Daddywher
e’s
Kamar
ia)
“
Samahani
mtot
owangu”(
I’
m sor
rymy
chi
l
d)myhear
tski
psabeatwhat
’s
goi
ngon
“
Sor
rywhy?what
’shappened?
”
“
Hebut
uket
i”(
let
’ssi
tdown)Wesi
t
down
“
Kwenz
enj
ani
mkhweny
ane”Gogoasks
i
nant
ici
pat
ion.Dadheav
esahugesi
gh
“
Idon’
tknowhowt
osayt
his”
“
Youar
escar
ingmedaddy
.Ismy
daught
erokay
?St
arandmom ar
ethey
okay
?”
“
Yest
heyar
efi
nebutmywi
fer
anaway
wi
thKamar
ia”Huh?
“
Whatdoy
oumean”Gogoasks
“
Shet
ookKamar
iaandv
ani
shwi
thher
wedon’
tknowwher
eshei
s,sheonl
y
l
eftanot
e”
HappyBi
rt
hdayMashi
l
aPhumue
Phumudz
o

CHAPTER43

Youknowt
hatf
eel
i
ngwheny
ouar
e
sl
eepi
ngbuty
oucanf
eel
thatsomeone
i
sst
arr
ingaty
ou?That
’showI
’
mfeel
i
ng
r
ightnowsoIbl
i
nkmyey
esopenand
myey
esar
ewel
comedbyhi
ssex
ypai
r.
Hef
lashesoneofhi
sgor
geoussmi
l
e.
Damnmybabyi
shotj
eal
ousdown.I
can’
tbel
i
evet
hatal
lthi
syummi
nessi
s
mi
ne.
“
Hey
”
“
Hel
l
obabyhowar
eyou”
“
I’
m al
ri
ghtwhatabouty
ou?
”
“
I’
m okayIhopey
ousl
eptwel
l
”
“
Ofcour
seaf
tert
hathel
l
uvani
ghtwe
hadandwaki
ngupnex
ttoy
ouwar
ms
myhear
t”It
houghtwewer
edoneaf
ter
t
he3r
droundbutnoLwandl
elwami
coul
dn’
tgetenoughofmenott
hatIwas
enoughofhi
m.Thi
sguyov
erher
e
knowshi
sgameIt
ell
you.I
’
m bur
ning
downt
her
e.
“
Ihav
eashoott
oday
,Ihav
etogo”
“
ButIwashopi
ngwewi
l
lspendaday
t
oget
herbaby
”
“
I’
m sor
rysweet
hear
tbutdut
ycal
l
s.I
wi
l
lmakei
tupt
oyouokay
”
“
Okay
”Ipoutandheki
ssesme.
“
Ilov
eyouLwandl
e”
“
Iknow”Ipi
nchhi
m causi
nghi
mto
wi
nce.
“
YazI
’
m st
il
lmadaty
ouwena”He
l
aughs
“
Hai
boaf
tert
hef
reakyni
ghtwehad,
onl
ynowy
our
emembert
haty
ouar
e
madatme”
“
YouknowIcan’
tresi
sty
ou”Hegi
ggl
es
“
Okayt
ell
mewhyar
eyoumadatme?
”
“
Thewayt
otal
kedt
omey
est
erdayon
t
hephone.Youwer
esocol
dnj
e”
“
ButIt
oldy
ouIwasbusy
,di
dn’
tI?
”
“
Youdi
dbuty
oudi
dn’
thav
etobecol
d
andy
oudi
dn’
ttel
lmey
oul
oveme”
“
Don’
tyouknowt
hatIl
ovey
ou?
”
“
Ohsoi
t’
sthathowi
tisnow?
”Hesi
ghs
heav
il
yandl
ooksatmei
ntensel
y.
Ther
e’st
hisemot
iont
hatpassesacr
oss
hi
sfacet
hatI
’
m unabl
etor
ead.
“
I’
m sor
ryandIl
ovey
ou”Ismi
l
eand
snuggl
ecl
osert
ohi
schest
,west
ayi
n
t
hatposi
ti
oni
nsi
l
ence.Il
ovet
hisguy
andIdon’
tknowwhatIwoul
ddoI
fI
wer
etol
osehi
m.Don’
tgetmewr
ong,
I
’
m notr
ejoi
cingonMi
ra’
s
di
sappear
ancebuti
fitwasn’
tforher
di
sappear
ance,
Iwoul
dn’
thav
emet
Lwandl
e.
“
Ihav
etogobaby
”
“
Justonemor
emi
nut
e”I
’
m st
il
lenj
oyi
ng
t
hismoment
.
“
I’
m sor
rysweet
hear
tbutI
’
m al
ready
l
ate”Heki
ssesmyf
oreheadandj
umps
outofbedt
hengetdr
essed.
“
Younotgoi
ngt
oshowerf
ir
st?
”
“
Iwi
l
lbat
hathome”Hef
ini
shget
ti
ng
dr
essedandki
ssesmet
henheadout
.I
not
icet
hathel
efthi
sphoneIscr
eam f
or
hi
snamebuti
t’
sseem l
i
kehe’
sal
ready
out
.It
akei
tfr
om t
hebedsi
det
abl
eand
at
houghtcr
ossmymi
ndbutIt
ryt
o
br
ushi
tof
fandputi
tback.Ist
arei
tfor
al
ongt
imeaghal
i
ttl
epeekwon’
thur
t.I
t
akei
tandunl
ocki
tlucki
l
yit
’shasno
passwor
d.Ismi
l
ewhenIseet
hatI
’
ma
homescr
eenwal
l
paperandputi
tback.I
don’
tseet
heneedt
ogot
hroughi
tvel
e
whatwasIdoi
ngIt
rustLwandl
e.Goi
ng
t
hroughhi
sphonewoul
dbe
di
srespect
inghi
m andshowi
ngl
ackof
t
rust
.Ir
oll
outofbedandhi
tashower
af
termaki
ngmybed.OnceI
’
m done
wi
thmyhy
gienepr
ocessIgetdr
essed.I
don’
thav
eacl
asst
odayandmost
ly
whenIdon’
thav
eacl
assIspendmy
daywi
thLwandl
esot
odayI
’
m goi
ngt
o
bebor
ed.I
’
m st
arv
ingbutI
’
minno
moodofcer
eal
andIhav
erunoutof
gr
ocer
ies.Mymom i
ssupposedt
obe
sendi
ngmoneyf
orgr
ocer
iesand
t
oil
etr
iest
oday
.Lwandl
e’
smom i
son
ni
ghtshi
ft
sthi
sweekwhynott
ake
Lwandl
e’
sphonet
ohi
shouse,
IknowI
wi
l
lfi
ndhi
smom busywi
thbr
eakf
ast
pl
usshe’
sagr
eatcook.Ther
e’snoway
I
’
m mi
ssi
ngbr
eakf
ast
.It
akemyphone
andcal
lTj
.
“
Shor
ty”
“
HeyTj
howar
eyou”
“
I’
m okayandy
our
sel
f?”
“
I’
mfi
neIneedt
ogot
oLwandl
e’
spl
ace”
“
OkayI
’
m comi
ng”
“
Thanky
ou”Ihungup.Lwandl
edoesn’
t
wantmet
ouset
axi
ssowhenev
erIwant
t
ogoIcal
lTj
tot
akemet
omy
dest
inat
ioni
fLwandl
eisbusyornot
av
ail
abl
eandhewi
l
lset
tl
ethebi
l
l.Tj
dr
ivesanUber
.Theyar
efr
iendsact
ual
l
y
soy
eah.Per
ksofhav
ingar
ichcel
ebr
it
y
boy
fri
end.Iknowhewi
l
lbeangr
yifhe
canf
indoutt
hatIhav
enogr
ocer
iesand
Idi
dn’
ttel
lhi
m.Ihav
emypr
ideokayand
besi
desI
’
m notwi
thhi
mforhi
smoney
andf
ame.Igr
abhi
sphoneandmi
ne
t
henheaddownst
air
s.15mi
nut
esl
ater
,
Tj
cal
l
smeandt
ell
smet
hathe’
s
out
side.Il
ockt
hedoorf
ir
standski
pout
.
“
HeyTj
”Isayaf
terj
umpi
ngi
nsi
det
he
car
“
HeyAy
anda”
“
Thanky
ouneh”
“
Youmyguy
’sgi
rl
fr
iendsodon’
tst
ress
andhe’
spay
ingsoy
eah”Inodwi
thmy
head.Wedr
ivei
ncomf
ort
abl
esi
l
ence.Tj
i
sani
ntr
over
tki
ndaguy
.It
hankhi
m
af
terdr
oppi
ngmeof
fatt
heNkosi
mansi
on.Ir
ingt
hebel
landt
hegat
e
opens,
Ithenmakemywayi
n.Lwandl
e’
s
mom openst
hedoorf
ormeas
ex
pect
ed.
“
Ayanda”Shesmi
l
eswi
del
y.
“
Hel
l
oMama”
“
Comei
nbaby
”Iwal
kinandshepul
l
s
mei
nherembr
ace.Shesmel
l
ssol
ovel
y.
“
Howar
eyoumom?
”
“
I’
m okaybabyhowar
eyou”
“
I’
mfi
ne,
I’
mjusthungr
y”Isayshy
lyshe
knowsI
’
m af
oodl
overandsheenj
oys
f
eedi
ngme
“
ComeSnoandIar
ehav
ingbr
eakf
ast
”
shesay
swi
thasmi
l
e,t
hiswomani
s
gor
geousguy
sjeal
ousdown.
“
Snoi
snotatschool
”IsayasIf
oll
ow
hert
othedi
ningr
oom.
“
Yesshehasf
lue”
“
Shame.
..
heySno”
“
Hi”Shesay
ssof
tl
yyoucanseet
hat
she’
sreal
l
ysi
ck.Wesi
tdownandIdi
sh
upf
ormy
sel
f.
“
Youdon’
thav
ecl
asst
oday
”
“
Yes.
..
Iact
ual
l
ybr
oughtLwandl
e’
s
phone”It
akei
toutandgi
vehert
oit
“
OhokayIwi
l
lgi
vei
ttohi
m”Weeatov
er
al
i
ghtchat
.Thel
i
ttl
ebr
ati
sreal
l
y
behav
ingt
odayi
sitwr
ongf
ormet
o
wi
shhert
obesi
ckev
ery
daysot
hatshe
canst
opbei
ngapai
ninmyass?
“
Eatbaby
”
“
I’
m nothungr
ymommy
”
“
Buty
ouhav
etoeatwecan’
tgot
othe
doct
orwi
thanempt
yst
omachshoul
d
shedeci
det
oinj
ecty
ou”
“
Youar
eadoct
or,
can’
tyout
reatmeand
pl
easenoi
nject
ions”
“
Unf
ort
unat
elyno,
soeatup”
“
Butmommy
”shesay
swi
thacr
ying
v
oice
“
Babypl
ease,
Iwi
l
lbuyy
out
hatbi
g
t
eddyy
ouwant
.Idl
ast
handwasami
”
“
Iwantt
womommy
”
“
Whyt
wo?
”
“
Iwantt
ogi
veMi
rat
heot
herone”I
chokeonmyf
oodandcough.
“
Arey
ouokayAy
anda?
”Inodwi
thmy
head,
shepassesmet
hegl
ass.
“
Thanky
ou”Igul
pdownt
hewat
er.Mi
ra
hasbeenf
ound?
“
Didy
ouheart
hatMi
rai
sbackYay
a”
shel
ooksatmewi
thawi
l
dsmi
l
e.
“
Awr
eal
l
y”If
akeasmi
l
e
“
Yesmal
umewami
foundher
,yest
erday
wewentt
oseeher
.Lwandl
eannoy
ed
me,
Iwant
edt
ohugMi
raf
ir
stbuthe
wasspi
nni
ngherar
oundandki
ssi
ngher
.
Idi
dn’
tev
engetachancet
ohugher
becausehepi
nchedmemommy
”Il
ook
atLwandl
e’
smom Icanseet
hatwhat
Snosai
dmakesheruncomf
ort
abl
e.So
i
t’
str
ueMi
rai
sbackandLwandl
edi
dn’
t
t
ell
met
hathewentt
oseeherand
ki
ssedher
!GodnowIseewhathe
meantwhenhesai
d“hewasbusy
”He
wasbusywi
thMi
ra!If
eel
myt
ear
sst
ing
myey
esandmyhear
tsi
nkst
othepi
tof
myst
omach.
“
Uhm Ihav
etogo”Isayget
ti
ngup
“
Buty
ouar
enotf
ini
shwi
thy
ourf
ood
baby
”
“
I’
mful
lnow,
thanky
ouf
orbr
eakf
ast
”I
makemywayoutbef
oreshesay
s
any
thi
ng.

Myey
esf
eel
ssoheav
yandIhav
ea
massi
veheadache.Ibl
i
nkmyey
esopen
andl
ookar
ound.I
’
m notf
ami
l
iarwi
th
t
hishouse.Wher
eam I
?Icl
osemyey
es
t
orecal
ltheev
ent
sthatl
edmeher
e.I
r
emembercr
yingmyl
ungsoutaf
terI
f
oundoutt
hatmyf
iancésl
eptwi
thmy
bestf
ri
endandhenev
ersawi
taneedt
o
t
ell
met
hat
.Nowt
heyhav
eadaught
er
t
oget
her
.Ir
emembergi
vi
nghi
mthe
engagementr
ingandl
eft
.Ikeptwal
ki
ng
wi
thnodi
rect
ionsandt
ear
sst
reami
ng
downmyf
ace.Ar
edpol
ovi
vopul
l
ed
ov
erandof
fer
edmeal
i
ft.Theguywas
annoy
ingandhewasper
sist
entsoI
endedupt
ell
i
nghi
mthatIdon’
tknow
wher
eIwasact
ual
l
ygoi
ngsohe
suggest
edt
hatwehadal
unchaf
ter
l
unchwehi
tthecl
ub.Howdi
dweget
her
eIdon’
tknowbecauseal
lI
r
ememberi
susdr
inki
ngatt
hecl
ub.I
l
ookathi
m nex
ttomeandpeekunder
bl
anket
.I’
m nakedsoi
shenonono
don’
ttel
lmet
hatI
…It
ouchmynunai
t’
s
bur
ningl
i
kehel
l
.Ourcl
othesar
e
scat
ter
edal
lov
ert
her
oom wi
thused
condoms.Nooooo!Guguwhathav
eyou
done!

Iwant
edt
owal
koutbuthi
swor
ds
echoedi
nmyear
s“Ineedy
out
othi
nk
aboutwhati
twi
l
ldot
oyourl
ovesonei
f
y
ouwer
etodi
eorgetsi
ck.Whati
t
woul
ddot
oMi
ra,
toy
ourmom,
to
gr
anddaught
er,
toZo,
tome?Thenex
t
t
imey
out
hinkaboutdr
inki
ngal
cohol
t
hinkaboutuspl
ease.Wel
ovey
ou
Bongaandwedon’
twantt
olosey
ou
pl
easedon’
trobusy
our
sel
f.Isee
my
sel
fwi
thnooneel
sebuty
oui
nthe
f
utur
e.Iwantgr
owol
dwi
thy
ouBonga.
Youar
eev
ery
thi
ngandmor
eIwanti
na
woman,
don’
tal
l
owmet
oinv
estso
muchi
nyout
henl
osey
oupr
emat
urel
yI
begy
ou.That
’swi
l
lki
l
lmebey
ond
i
magi
nat
ion”Soher
eIam nowandI
’
m
sosur
pri
sedt
oseet
hatt
her
ear
emor
e
womenher
ethanmen.I
t’
s5ofuswho
ar
ewomenex
ceptt
hechai
rper
sonand
3men.Themeet
ingspr
oceedsunt
ili
t
f
ini
shes.Idon’
tknowwhatt
osayabout
myf
ir
stmeet
ingbutIhopet
henex
t
meet
ingsIwi
l
lhav
etosomet
hingt
osay
.
Inot
icesomeonef
ami
l
iarasIunl
ockmy
car
“
Nokubonga”Forsomer
easonIcan
nev
erf
orgetherbutI
’
m sur
pri
sedt
hat
sheknowsmyname.
“
Hi”
“
Idi
dn’
tknowy
ouar
eanal
cohol
i
c”
“
Excusemewhywoul
dyouknow?What
busi
nessdoy
ouhav
eregar
dingmy
l
i
fe?
”
“
Not
hingofcour
se,
it’
sjustt
hatInev
er
t
houghtKhuz
ani
wil
lgof
oranal
cohol
i
c”
“
Khet
hiwe…”
“
It
’sKhosi
”Bi
tchdoy
out
hinkIcar
e
“
What
every
ournamei
s,don’
tal
l
owa
mant
hatsawy
ouasasper
m di
sht
o
makey
oubi
tt
er”shecl
i
ckshert
ongue
andwal
ksaway
.Ishakemyheadand
geti
nmycart
hendr
iveout
.Iknowt
hat
t
heywer
efucki
ngbecauseKt
oldme.I
coul
dn’
thol
dmy
sel
fIhadt
oaskImean
t
hiswomant
rav
ell
edal
lthewayf
rom
Dur
bant
oCapeTownj
ustt
oseehi
m
whenhewasshot
.Iwasj
eal
ousy
esI
sai
dit
!Ihopeshewon’
tbecomea
pr
obl
em becauseIwon’
ttol
erat
eher
shi
t.Inot
icet
hatIhav
epl
ent
yofmi
ssed
cal
l
sfr
om mymom andKbutsi
nceI
’
m
dr
ivi
nghomev
eleIcal
lKf
ir
st
“
Hel
l
osnookums”Hear
inghi
svoi
cei
s
enoughf
ormybodyt
opopgoosebumps.
“
DaddyK,
arey
ougood?
”
“
Nowt
hatI
’
m hear
ingy
ourv
oice,
ev
ery
thi
ngi
sokay
.Yousl
eptwel
l
?”
“
Yeswena”
“
Met
oo.
..
arey
oudr
ivi
ng?
”
“
YesI
’
m dr
ivi
nghome”
“
Coul
dn’
tyouj
ustwai
tfi
rstunt
ily
ou
ar
ri
vehomet
hencal
lme”Ir
oll
myey
es,
i
t’
sfunnyhowhedoesn’
twantmet
obe
ont
hephonewhi
l
edr
ivi
ngbuthehar
dly
pr
act
icewhathepr
each
“
Iknowy
ouar
erol
l
ingy
ourey
esr
ight
now.Cont
inueIsaycont
inuer
oll
your
ey
esatme,
cont
inuey
ezwa”Igi
ggl
e
“
Youwon’
tgi
ggl
ewhenIf
uckt
hatr
oll
i
ng
ey
est
endencyoutofy
ou.Youwon’
tbe
abl
etowal
kforamont
h”mypussy
cl
enchespai
nful
l
y
“
K”Imoan
“
No,
it’
sfi
necont
inuesnookums”Hi
s
deephuskyv
oicei
snotdoi
ngmeany
j
ust
ice.
“
Arey
ouev
ensupposedt
osaysuch
t
hingswhi
l
eI’
m dr
ivi
ng”Hel
aughs
“
Youar
enotev
ensupposedt
obe
t
alki
ngt
omewhi
l
edr
ivi
ngsnookums.
Uphumaphi
vel
e”(
wher
ear
eyoucomi
ng
f
rom
“
AAmeet
ing”
“
Real
l
y?”
“
Yes”
“
Oht
hanky
oul
ord!Howwasi
t?”
“
Howwasi
t?”Isi
gh
“
Idon’
tknow”
“
Itwasy
ourf
ir
stday
,youwi
l
lgetused
t
oit
.I’
m pr
oudofy
ouy
ezwa”
“
Thanky
ouf
oropeni
ngmyey
es.I
’
m
goi
ngt
ocommi
tmy
sel
fint
hese
meet
ings”
“
That
’smyj
aan.Youj
ustmademea
pr
ouddaddy
.Howaboutdi
nnert
oni
ght
aty
ourf
avour
it
erest
aur
ant
”Ismi
l
e
“
Soundsokay
”
“
Whatt
ime?
”
“
7:30”
“
OkayIwi
l
lpi
cky
ouupat7:
30”
“
Youwi
l
lfi
ndmer
eady
”
“
Goodnowhungupanddr
ivehomeno
mor
ephonecal
l
sunt
ily
ouar
ri
vehome”
Il
augh
“
YesDaddy
”
“
Bonga”
“
Yes”
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
ByeK”Ihangupbef
orehesay
s
any
thi
ng.Hehasnev
ersai
dthe3wor
ds
bef
ore,
theycaughtmeof
fguar
dandi
t
doesn’
thel
pthatt
heyar
escar
ingme.
Whati
fthi
ssweetandgent
leKhuz
ani
i
t’
sjustaf
acade?

-
“
Muuj
i
zat
hedayy
ouwal
kedi
nourl
i
ves
y
ougav
emyl
i
feanewmeani
ngand
pur
pose.Iknewt
hatIwoul
dlov
eyou
l
i
kemyownandwhenwef
oundoutt
hat
y
ouwer
epr
egnantIf
elthour
nedf
ort
he
doubl
ebl
essi
ng.Yourpr
esenceaswel
l
asKamar
ia’
swi
pedawayt
ear
sof
sor
rowandf
il
ledt
hev
oidofl
ongi
nga
chi
l
d.Yout
wower
eli
kemyown.Iknow
howmot
her
hoodf
eel
sthr
oughbot
hof
y
ouespeci
all
yKamar
iabecauseIr
aised
herf
rom bi
rt
hunt
ilnow.Iex
per
ienced
t
hesl
eepl
essni
ght
sIwasl
ongi
ngf
or,
t
hebl
i
ssf
ulday
sseei
nghergr
owi
ngup
andbecomi
ngt
hisl
i
ttl
egi
rlshei
sri
ght
now.Inev
ert
houghtt
hisdaywi
l
lcome
wher
eIneedt
olety
ouandhergo.Iwas
sur
ethaty
ouguy
sar
egoi
ngt
obemi
ne
f
orev
erandIwascont
entl
i
ttl
edi
dI
knowt
hatGodwasmaki
ngmeaf
ool
!
Hebl
essedmewi
tht
het
woofy
ouand
mademet
ast
emot
her
hoodonl
yforme
t
olety
ougoaf
ter4y
ear
s?I
t’
ssounf
air
babyI
’
m sor
ryt
hatIhadt
odot
hist
o
y
oubutIcan’
tlosey
oual
lIr
atherl
ose
oneofy
ou.I
’
m sor
rymydear
est
daught
erbutIl
ovey
ousomuch”Dad
r
eadt
henot
eformet
hati
swr
it
tenby
mom.I
’
m shockaboutt
hist
urnoutI
di
dn’
tex
pecti
t.
“
That
’si
t”Dadsay
s
“
Nonomom can’
tdot
hatdadshecan’
t
dot
hist
ome!
”I’
m cl
oset
obr
eaki
ng
down
“
Uyahl
any
ayi
nil
omf
azi
ucat
hi
angabal
ekanomz
ukul
uwam soz
eI’
m
cal
l
ingt
hepol
i
ce!
”(I
sthi
swomancr
azy
shet
hinksshecanr
unawaywi
thmy
gr
anddaught
ernev
erI
’
m cal
l
ingt
he
pol
i
ce!
)Gogosay
s
“
Pleasedon’
tcal
lthepol
i
ce,
letmet
ryt
o
f
indher
.She’
sgoi
ngt
hroughal
otr
ight
now.Losi
ngMi
raandKamar
iaatt
he
samet
imesetherback”
“
HeyheyIdon’
tcar
eMwangi
wear
eal
l
goi
ngt
hroughal
otbuty
oudon’
tseeus
st
eal
i
ngot
herpeopl
eki
ds!
”
“
Pleasemamaj
ustgi
vemet
ime.She
can’
tbet
hatf
ar.She’
sconf
usedandnot
t
hinki
ngst
rai
ghtI
’
m beggi
ngy
ou”
“
Hay
igi
vey
out
imet
orunawaywi
thmy
gr
anddaught
ernev
er,
wher
e’smy
phone!
”Idobr
eat
hingex
erci
sest
ocal
m
my
sel
fdownatl
east
,Iknowt
hatshe’
s
saf
ewi
thmamabutt
het
houghtofnot
seei
ngheragai
nbr
eaksmyhear
t.Ican’
t
hel
pasobt
hatescapesmyl
i
ps.Ican’
t
l
osemydaught
ernonono
“
Youseewhatt
hatcr
azywomanof
y
our
sisdoi
ng?Mi
rahadbeent
hrougha
l
otal
readyshedoesn’
tneedt
his!
”Dad’
s
scentf
il
lsmynost
ri
lsasheenv
elopes
mei
nhi
sar
ms.
“
Samahani
mtot
owanguni
naahi
dikuwa
ni
tawapat
anakuwal
etawal
ausi
l
ia”(
I’
m
sor
rymybaby
,Ipr
omi
seIwi
l
lfi
ndt
hem
andbr
ingt
hem backdon'
tcr
yokay
)I
nodwi
thmyhead.
“
Don’
tli
stent
ohi
m Mi
ra,
theyar
efool
i
ng
y
ou.Theywantt
otakey
ourdaught
er
awayf
rom y
ou!
”
“
Iunder
standt
haty
oudon’
tknowme
buti
fIwant
edt
odot
hatdoy
out
hinkI
woul
dhav
ecomeher
e?”
“
Yest
ofool
uskant
inawey
ouar
e
f
oll
owi
ngt
hem.Whydon’
tyouwantme
t
ocal
lthepol
i
ce?
”Gogoi
sangr
yand
shecan’
tev
enhi
dei
t.
“
Iunder
standy
ourf
rust
rat
ionMabut
pl
easemywi
fecan’
tgot
ojai
l
.She’
s
al
readybr
oken,
pleaseIwi
l
ldowhat
ever
i
t’
stakest
ofi
ndherandbr
ingKamar
ia
backj
ustdon’
ttel
lthepol
i
ce”
“
Hay
iI….
”
“
Gogopl
easeIunder
standwhatmom i
s
goi
ngt
hrough.I
tcan’
tbeeasyf
orhert
o
l
oseherchi
l
drenespeci
all
yKamar
ia
si
nceshebondedwi
thhersi
nceshe
wasabor
n.”
“
Mir
amygr
andchi
l
dit
’snoty
ourf
aul
t
nori
sitKami
na’
sfaul
tthatshecan’
t
hav
echi
l
dren.Sheneedt
oacceptt
hat
!I
don’
ttr
ustt
hispeopl
ewhysuddenl
y
Kami
nai
sgone?Thi
sispar
toft
hei
r
pl
an”
“
Wel
lIt
rustt
hem t
hesepeopl
erai
sed
meandmydaught
erf
or4y
ear
swi
thout
ex
pect
ati
ons.Theygav
eusnot
hingbut
pur
elov
ethel
eastwecoul
ddof
ort
hem
i
stounder
standt
hesi
tuat
ionmom i
s
goi
ngt
hroughandnoti
ncl
udet
hepol
i
ce.
Mom i
snott
hinki
ngst
rai
ghtshe’
s
scar
edofl
osi
ngus”
“
Iheeedon’
tsayIdi
dn’
twar
nyou!
”Ihear
herf
oot
stepswal
ki
ngaway
.Am Iwr
ong
t
otr
ustt
heMwangi
’
sImeant
hese
peopl
egav
emel
i
feandhomef
or4
y
ear
sandt
heyhav
enev
ercomeacr
oss
aspeopl
ewoul
dhur
tmedel
i
ber
atel
y.
“
Asant
emt
otokwakuami
nimi
mimi
mi
ahadi
nit
awapat
a”(
Thanky
oubabyf
or
bel
i
evi
ngi
nmeIpr
omi
seIwi
l
lfi
ndt
hem)
“
nakupendaBaba”(
Ilov
eyoudad)
“
Ninakupendapi
amt
oto”(
Ilov
eyout
oo
baby
)Heki
ssesmyf
orehead.IswearI
hav
efoundaf
atheri
nthi
sman.
“
Ishoul
dgetgoi
ngandl
ookf
ort
hem”
“
Wher
e’sSt
ar?
”
“
Shel
efty
est
erdayf
orJohannesbur
g
r
egar
dingherdeej
ayi
ngst
uff
”
“
Ohokaypl
easecal
lmeassoonasy
ou
f
indsomet
hing”
“
Giv
emey
ournumber
”Ical
loutmy
numbert
ohi
m af
tert
hathesay
s
goodby
eandl
eav
es.JustasI
’
m onmy
wayt
omybedr
oom gogocal
l
sme
“
Nunuz
a”
“
Gogo”
“
Aguycal
l
edSoxi
sher
efory
ou”my
hear
tst
opsbeat
ing.I
’
m notr
eadyt
o
f
acehi
m now.Whatwoul
dIsayt
ohi
m?
“
Mtwana”
“
Mal
umeSox
”
“
Iwi
l
lbei
ntheki
tchencal
l
ingy
our
mom”speaki
ngofmom wher
eisshe
v
ele.Hesi
tsnex
ttomeandsuf
focat
e
mewi
thhi
sscent
.
“
Howar
eyou?
”
“
I’
mfi
ne”
“
CanIhugy
ou?
”
“
Sur
e”Hepul
l
smei
nhi
sar
msandIsi
nk
i
nhi
sar
ms.
“
Imi
ssedy
ousomuchmt
wana,
GodI
t
houghtIwi
l
lnev
erseey
ouagai
n.Do
y
ouknowhowhar
dithasbeenf
orme
wi
thouty
ou”
“
I’
m sor
ry”
“
Wher
ewer
eyou?4y
ear
sMi
ra”Iex
plai
n
t
ohi
m whathappened.
“
Whydi
dn’
tyoucal
lmet
hatni
ght
”
“
Cal
lyouwi
thwhatmal
umeSox
,you
t
hinkt
her
ewast
imet
otakeaphone?
”
Heheav
esasi
gh
“
Okayf
inebutwheny
ougott
oKeny
a
y
oushoul
dhav
ecal
l
edespeci
all
ywhen
y
ouf
oundouty
ouwer
epr
egnant
”
“
Idi
dn’
twantt
ori
sky
ourl
i
feaswel
las
mi
ne.Iknewt
hati
fIcont
act
edy
ou
Khumal
owoul
dknowandbesi
desy
ou
wer
ewor
kingf
orhi
m”
“
Ohsoy
out
hinkIwoul
dhav
ebr
ought
har
mtoy
ou?
”
“
I’
m notsay
ingt
hatmal
umeSoxbut
Khumal
owoul
dhav
ethr
eat
enedt
oki
l
lif
y
ouknewaboutmywher
eabout
sand
nott
ell
him.
”
“
Howdoy
ouknowshe’
smychi
l
dI
meany
ouwer
eal
sosl
eepi
ngwi
th
Lwandl
e”Ichuckl
e
“
That
’sani
nsul
t!
”
“
NoI
’
m noti
nsul
ti
ngy
oubutIneedt
obe
sur
eMi
ra.
”
“
Whywoul
dIl
i
eandsayshe’
syourchi
l
d
whenshe’
snot
?Doy
out
hinkIwantt
o
hav
eyourchi
l
d?No!i
fitwaspossi
ble
Kamar
iawoul
dbeLwenkosi
’
snoty
our
s
especi
all
yaf
terf
oundi
ngouty
ouar
e
engagedt
omybestf
ri
end!Real
l
y
Mal
umeSox
?Whathappenedt
o“Il
ove
y
ouMi
ra.Thev
eryf
ir
stt
imeIsawy
ou
somet
hingi
nmemov
ed.Youwer
eonl
y
15y
ear
sol
d,Idi
dn’
twantt
oov
erwhel
m
y
ouandMrKt
rust
edme.It
oldmy
sel
fI
wi
l
lwai
tfory
out
ogr
owbuti
twashar
d
becauseev
erysi
ngl
edaymyl
ovef
or
y
ougr
ewnomat
terhowIt
ri
edt
o
suppr
essi
t.Wheny
out
urned18I
t
houghty
ouar
eol
denoughnowandI
want
edt
omakeamov
ebutIcoul
dn’
t
becauseLwandl
elwenkosi
camei
ntot
he
pi
ctur
e”whathappenedt
othathuh?
”
“
Ial
sot
oldy
ouImadepeacet
haty
ou
andIcannev
erbet
oget
her
….”
“
Soy
out
houghtl
etmej
ustj
umpt
oher
f
ri
end,
sinceIcan’
thav
eher
?That
’sso
l
owofy
ouuncl
eSox
.”
“
LookI
’
m sor
ryokay
,Inev
ermeantf
or
t
hingst
obet
hiswayandIdi
dn’
tknow
y
ouwi
l
lfal
lpr
egnant
..
.”
“
Didy
oubuymemor
ningaf
terory
ou
ej
acul
atej
uice?
”
“
Don’
tber
ude,
I’
mtr
yingt
oex
plai
nher
e”
“
Ther
e’snot
hingy
ouwi
l
lsayt
hatwi
l
l
makemeunder
standwhyy
ouchoset
o
bei
nrel
ati
onshi
pwi
thmybestf
ri
end
af
terf
ucki
ngme?Doy
ouknowhowt
his
wi
l
laf
fectourf
ri
endshi
p?Wher
eisshe
now?Doessheknowy
ouar
eher
e?The
l
astt
hingIwanti
stocausepr
obl
ems
bet
weent
het
woofy
ou.
”
“
Soj
ustbecauseIl
ovey
ouMi
ra,
I
shoul
dn’
tfi
ndsomeonewhocanl
ove
me?
”
“
Wehadsexmal
umeSoxhowcany
ou
mov
eont
omybestf
ri
end”
“
Whati
fIl
oveher
?”
“
Youshoul
dhav
etol
dherkef
rom t
he
begi
nni
ng!I
fshechoset
ost
aybyt
he
t
imeIcomebackshewoul
dhav
e
pr
epar
edher
sel
ffort
hepossi
bil
i
tiesof
mehav
ingachi
l
dwi
thy
ounotambush
herl
i
ket
his.Thi
swi
l
laf
fectour
f
ri
endshi
p,I
’
mtel
l
ingy
ou!
”
“
Stopshout
ingatmephel
a!Iaskedy
ou
aquest
ionhowdoy
ouknowshe’
smi
ne”
“
I’
m bl
i
nd,
I’
m notdumb.WhenIf
ound
outIwas4weekspr
egnant
,Iknewi
t’
s
y
our
sbecausey
ouar
etheonl
ymanI
sl
eptwi
thwi
thoutpr
otect
ion4weeks
pr
ior
.Lwenkosi
andIal
way
suse
pr
otect
iont
hef
ir
stt
imewi
thout
pr
otect
ionIt
ookmor
ningaf
teri
fitdi
dn’
t
wor
kIwoul
dhav
ebeenal
most8weeks
pr
egnant
”
“
Whatabout1%.
..
”
“
Heeenansi
imohl
olay
ami
,youknow
whatshe’
snoty
our
s”
“
Don’
tpl
ayl
i
ket
hatMi
ra!
”
“
Whosai
dI’
m pl
ayi
ng,
mosI
’
mtel
l
ing
y
oushe’
syour
sbuty
oudoubt
”
“
I’
m sor
ryi
t’
sjustt
hatIonceIr
aiseda
chi
l
dthatwasnev
ermi
nesoIdon’
t
wantt
ogobackt
hrought
hatshi
tagai
n”
Isi
gh
“
Iunder
standi
fyouwantDNAt
esty
ou
candoi
t”
“
Noti
t’
sfi
ne,
Ibel
i
evey
ou.Wher
eis
she?
”Iswal
l
owhar
d
“
She’
swi
thmyadopt
ivemot
her
”
“
Cal
lherandt
ell
herIwantt
oseemy
daught
er”
“
Uhm whydon’
tyoucomesomeot
her
t
ime”gosht
hishar
d.
“
Hay
iIwantt
oseehernowi
t’
sbad
enought
hatIl
ostal
most4y
ear
scal
lthe
mot
hernowandt
ell
herIwantt
oseemy
daught
er”
“
She’
suhm…”
“
Whatnow?
”It
ell
him whathappened,
hedeser
vest
oknow
“
What
!”
“
I’
m sor
rymal
umeSox
,dadwi
l
lfi
nd
her
…”
“
Heyheyungangi
hlany
isi
Mir
a,y
oukept
mydaught
erawayf
rom meal
most4
y
ear
sandnowy
out
ell
met
hatshe’
s
gone!
”He’
sangr
yandIunder
standbut
whyhe’
smaki
ngi
tmyf
aul
t.
“
I’
m sor
ryOkayI
…”
“
Don’
ttel
lmesor
ry!
..
.”
“
Ehwenadon’
tyoudar
eshoutatmy
dol
l
face!
”Lwenkosi
say
sashemakes
hi
swayi
n.
“
Fucky
ouLwandl
e,I
’
m nott
alki
ngt
o
y
ou!
”
“
Youar
enott
alki
ngy
ouar
eshout
ing!
!”
“
Whatt
hef
ucki
syourpr
obl
em
Lwandl
e!?
”
“
Mypr
obl
em i
syou!Wahl
abaumf
azi
wami
wenanj
anx
!”gosht
hisi
sgoi
ng
outofpr
opor
ti
onnow
“
Mfaz
iwakho?Ngangi
kul
ayasl
i
ma!
”
“
Yousonofadog!
”Ihearmal
umeSox
chuckl
i
ng“
Youpunchl
i
keagi
rlboy
”
“
Nxngi
zokubul
alaSoxv
haIwi
l
lki
l
l
y
ou!
!”
“
Idon’
thav
eti
mef
ory
ounx
.Mi
raIwi
l
l
comebackt
oseemydaught
erandy
ou
bet
terhav
eher
”
“
Daught
er?
”
“
Ohy
oudi
dn’
tknow,
your
emembert
hat
dayy
ouwal
kedi
nonuswecr
eat
edour
bundl
eofj
oy”Icanhearasmi
l
ethr
ough
hi
svoi
ce.
“
Mir
aisi
ttr
ue”i
t’
scomesoutas
whi
sper
.Ohl
ord!myhear
tsi
nkst
othe
pi
tofmyst
omach.
HappyBi
rt
hdayNt
oyi
ntombi
Fai
th
Maz
aleni
&
Mal
etsat
siLi
nahManny
eoMosi
a

CHAPTER44

Isneakoutofbedandgetdr
essed
qui
ckl
y.OnceI
’
m doneIt
ipt
oeheadi
ng
out
side.Isi
ghi
nrel
i
efwhenImakei
t
out
sidet
hegat
e.Iswi
tchonmyphone
t
her
e’sdoz
ensofmessagesandt
hey
ar
eal
lfr
om Soxbeggi
ngmet
ocome
backhome.Ihav
enowher
etogov
ele,
may
bei
t’
sti
meIwearmybi
ggi
rl
pant
ies.LuckyIgetal
i
ftandi
tdr
opme
of
fatourapar
tment
.Imakemywayi
n,
i
tseemsl
i
kehe’
snother
esoIhi
ta
shower
.If
eel
gui
l
tyhonest
lybuti
t
happenedandt
her
e’snot
hingIcando
abouti
t,whatIneedt
odoi
stomake
sur
ethathenev
erf
indout
.I’
m notgoi
ng
t
ogi
veuponusj
ustl
i
ket
hat
.SoxandI
hav
eagr
eatt
hinggoi
ng.Mi
rahashi
s
daught
eronl
y,I
’
m hi
sfi
ancée,
andI
’
m
goi
ngt
ofi
ghtf
orwhatbel
ongst
ome.
Mpendul
oDl
ami
nii
smi
ne!

Ican’
tst
opt
hinki
ngaboutwhatKsai
d.I
f
eart
hathemi
ghtnotbet
heper
sonhe
appear
stobe.If
eart
hatonceIgi
veal
l
ofmy
sel
ftohi
m,hewi
l
lchangeand
becomet
hisani
mal
Ican’
tev
en
r
ecogni
ze.Iwasl
uckyt
hef
ir
stt
imet
his
t
imeImi
ghtnotcomeoutal
i
ve.Iknow
t
hathe’
snotKhumal
obutwhati
fhe’
s
wor
set
hanKhumal
o?Si
ghIpul
lov
er
nex
ttoSoxandLwandl
e’
scarandst
ep
outofmycar
.
“
JesusNonoIhav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
ocal
l
y
ou,
wher
ewer
eyou!
”
“
Iwr
oteanot
enj
emama”
“
Not
eyani
youshoul
dhav
eanswer
ed
y
ourphone”
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
MrsMwangi
tookof
fwi
thKami
na!
”
“
What
?”
“
YesMrMwangi
washer
e”Ihearnoi
se
comi
ngf
rom t
hel
i
vingr
oom andgo
t
her
e.Ibumpi
ntoLwandl
eashewal
ks
outl
ooki
ngangr
yandbr
okenatt
he
samet
ime
“
What
’sgoi
ngonher
e?”
“
Mommy
”shebur
sti
ntot
ear
s
“
Soxumenz
ani
umt
anami
!”
“
Iwantmydaught
er!
”
“
Itol
dhi
m mommyt
hatmom r
anaway
wi
thherbuthe’
smaki
ngi
tmyf
aul
t”
“
Udaki
weSox
,getoutofmyhouse!
”
“
Thi
sisy
ourpl
anhuh?Youwantt
okeep
mydaught
erawayf
rom me?
”
“
Aykahl
emf
anawehav
efarmor
e
ser
iouspr
obl
emsr
ightnowt
otol
erat
e
y
ourdr
ama.Thener
vey
ouhav
etosay
wear
ekeepi
ngy
ourchi
l
dawayf
rom
y
ouasi
fyouhav
eev
enpai
ddamages.
Uwudel
eli
l
eumuz
iwal
ayi
khay
a
gokumi
thi
saumz
ukul
uwami
,you
shoul
dbepay
ingr
espectayl
odot
i
owenz
ayo”Mom say
s
“
Wakabani
isi
bongo?
”
“
Dlami
ni”
“
Yourf
athernev
ert
aughty
our
espect
especi
all
ymawenz
eecal
aemz
ini
womunt
u”
“
Inev
erknewmyf
ather
”
“
Nowonderul
uhl
azanj
eleav
eandcome
backwheny
ouhav
elear
ntsome
r
espectandacknowl
edgewhaty
ouhav
e
done”Soxwal
ksoutf
umi
ngwi
thanger
.
Isi
tnex
ttomydaught
erandhol
dheri
n
myar
msasshesobssi
l
ent
ly
“
Shhhdon’
tcr
ymybaby
,it
’sgoi
ngt
obe
okay
”
“
Nonoweneedt
ocal
lthepol
i
cebut
Mi
radoesn’
twantt
o.ThatMrMwangi
is
f
ool
i
ngherweal
lknowt
hatt
heycan’
t
hav
echi
l
drent
hisi
sthei
rpl
an”
“
Mom pl
easewecan’
tinv
olv
ethepol
i
ce.
Mom Cabawi
l
lbear
rest
ed,
Idon’
twant
hert
obear
rest
ed.She’
sscar
edof
l
osi
ngus.Dadsai
dhewi
l
lfi
ndher
,let
’s
gi
vehi
m achance”
“
Theywi
l
lbef
arbyt
het
imey
our
eal
i
ze
t
heyar
epl
ayi
ngy
ou!
”Mom say
s.If
eel
sor
ryf
orCabangi
l
ehonest
lyknowi
ng
t
haty
oucan’
thav
echi
l
drenandwhen
y
out
houghty
ouhav
efi
nal
l
yfoundt
he
oney
oucoul
dcl
aim asy
ourownt
hey
r
etur
nbackt
owher
etheybel
ongi
tcan’
t
beeasyonherhowev
ershehasnor
ight
t
orunawaywi
thmygr
anddaught
er.
“
Mir
aisr
ightmom l
etgi
vet
hem a
chancet
hesepeopl
erai
sedmydaught
er
l
i
ket
hei
rown”
“
Butt
hatdoesn’
tmeant
heyshoul
drun
awaywi
thherdaught
erNono”
“
Yesmom butl
et’
sbeal
i
ttl
e
compassi
onat
etot
hem.IhopeMwangi
wi
l
lfi
ndt
hem,
I’
m sur
eheknowswher
e
t
heycoul
dbe”
”
Heeeasaz
i!
”Shet
hrowsherhandson
t
heai
rinsur
renderandwal
ksout
.Ihope
she’
snotr
ightbecauseIdon’
twantt
o
begi
ntot
hinkhowbr
okenmydaught
er
wi
l
lbe.
“
Don’
tcr
ymyMi
racl
e”Iwi
pehert
ear
s
andki
ssherf
orehead.Il
ovet
hatshe’
s
al
l
owi
ngmet
obeher
eforher
.
“
Wher
ear
eyoucomi
ngf
rom?
”
“
From AAmeet
ing”
“
Asi
nAl
cohol
i
csAnony
mousmeet
ing?
”
“
Yes”
“
Sincewhenar
eyouanal
cohol
i
c?”
“
Yourdi
sappear
anceki
l
ledmebaby
,
al
cohol
wast
heonl
ythi
nkIf
oundsol
ace
i
n”
“
I’
m gl
ady
ouar
edoi
ngsomet
hingabout
i
tmom.
”
“
Yeahi
t’
sbeent
ool
ongnow,
it’
sti
meI
getmyl
i
fet
oget
her
”Shesnuggl
es
cl
oser
“
LookI
’
m sor
ryaboutl
yi
ng…”
“
Idon’
twantt
otal
kabouti
tnowj
ust
hol
dmepl
ease”Idoasshesay
s
Ti
mef
lybyandst
il
lther
e’snonews
f
rom Mwangi
.Mi
rai
sfr
eaki
ngoutsoam
I
.Ideci
det
ocal
lhi
m
“
Hel
l
o”
“
MrMwangi
,i
t’
sBonga,
Mir
a’smom”
“
MrsKhumal
oI’
m st
il
ll
ooki
ngf
ort
hem,
I
pr
omi
set
ofi
ndt
hem.Theycan’
tbet
hat
f
ar”
“
Okaypl
easel
etusknowwheny
ouf
ind
somet
hing”
“
Iwi
l
l”
“
Whatdoeshesay
”Mi
raasks
”
Hehasn’
tfoundt
hem”Herey
esgl
i
sten
wi
tht
ear
s
“
Don’
tcr
ybaby
”SomehowIt
rust
Mwangi
tof
indt
hem.Myphoner
ings,
i
t’
sK
“
K”
“
I’
m her
etopi
cky
ouup”ohGod!If
orgot
i
sit7:
30al
ready
“
Uhm I
’
m sor
ryIcan’
tgo”
“
Oh”Hesoundsdi
sappoi
ntedandI
under
stand
“
I’
m sor
ryIshoul
d’v
etol
dyout
hatI
won’
tmakei
t.Mydaught
erneedme,
Cabangi
l
eranawaywi
thKamar
ia”
“
What
!Whyy
oudi
dn’
ttel
lme?
”
“
Ther
e’sal
otgoi
ngonmymi
nd…”
“
Youshoul
dhav
etol
dmeBonga!
”He
hungsupmi
nut
elat
eIhearhi
m gr
eet
ing
mymom i
ntheki
tchent
henhemakes
hi
swayi
nlooki
ngal
lgor
geousIswearI
wantt
odev
ourhi
mri
ghtnow.
“
Sani
bonani
”
“
Yebo”Hesi
tsdown
“
Whatex
act
lyhappened?
”Mi
raex
plai
n
whathappened
“
KodaBongat
hewhol
edayut
hul
e
awushol
utho,
Iwoul
dhav
etr
ackedher
bef
oreshecoul
dev
engetf
ar.Who
knowsshecoul
dbeoutoft
hecount
ry
now,r
emembershe’
sSpi
der
’sr
elat
ive!
”
“
Don’
tshoutpl
ease”Isay
,hegr
oans
andr
ubshi
shead
“
I’
m sor
rymar
ayoudi
dn’
tthi
nkBonga”
“
Iknow,
pleasehel
pMwangi
tof
ind
t
hem,
I’
m beggi
ngy
ou”
“
Iwi
l
ldoany
thi
ngt
ofi
ndt
hem”Iwal
k
hi
m outi
t’
schi
l
lyout
sideanddar
k.
Wi
nteri
scr
eepi
ngi
n.
“
Giv
emeMwangi
’
sphonenumber
”I
gi
vehi
mthenumberandhesav
ethem
“
Don’
twor
ryIwi
l
lfi
ndt
hem”Her
ubsby
ar
mspr
oduci
ngheat
.
“
Itr
usty
ou”Hepul
l
smecl
oserandwe
shar
eapassi
onat
eki
sst
hatl
eav
esme
dr
encheddownt
her
e.
“
Iwi
l
lcal
lyouy
ezwa”Inodwi
thmyhead
suddenl
ymyv
oicei
slost
,thi
ngst
his
mandoest
ome.Hehugsmef
ort
he
l
astt
imeandgeti
nhi
scar
.Hehoot
onceanddr
iveof
f.

Themor
eday
spassesbyIf
eel
li
ket
he
sl
i
mmerchancesIwi
l
lev
erseemy
daught
eragai
n.I
t’
sbeenaweeksi
nce
mom t
ookof
fwi
thmymoonl
i
ght
.I’
m so
scar
edIt
houghtbynowshewi
l
lbe
f
ound.Dadandmal
umeKhuz
ani
are
wor
kingt
oget
hert
ofi
ndherandIr
eal
l
y
appr
eci
atet
hat
.Ij
ustwi
sht
heycanf
ind
t
hem al
ready
.Thi
swai
ti
ngi
ski
l
li
ngmeI
hav
ethesewhati
f’
sthatI
’
mtr
yinghar
d
t
opushatt
hebackofmymi
nd.If
eel
l
i
keeachdaywi
thoutt
hegoodnewsof
mydaught
erbei
ngf
ound,
thedar
keri
t
get
sint
hishol
e.Mal
umeSoxi
snot
hel
pingt
hesi
tuat
ion,
he’
ssoadamant
t
hatI
’
m keepi
nghi
sdaught
erawayf
rom
hi
m.Ir
eal
l
ydon’
tunder
standhowt
hat
man’
sheadwor
ks,
forsomer
eason
ungi
shi
ntshel
enj
ebutheyi
t’
sbeen4
y
ear
speopl
echange.Thent
her
e’s
Lwenkosi
sigh!Ihav
en’
tseenhi
m ev
er
si
ncet
hatdayandhenev
erev
engav
e
meachancet
oex
plai
nev
ery
thi
ngt
o
hi
m.Hej
ustdashedoutl
eav
ingwi
thmy
hear
t.Honest
lymal
umeSoxwasoutof
l
i
neIwant
edt
otel
lLwenkosi
mysel
fand
onmyownt
erms.May
bei
t’
sfort
he
bestt
hathechoset
ost
ayawayf
rom
mesot
hatIcanal
sol
ear
ntoaccept
t
hatwecannev
erbet
oget
herandhe
hassomeonei
nhi
sli
fe.

“
Baby
”
“
Mommy
”Isaywi
thahoar
sev
oicef
rom
al
lthecr
ying
“
Youhav
ebeeni
nthi
sbedf
ort
hewhol
e
weeknowy
ouneedt
ogetoutandhav
e
abat
h”YesIhav
en’
tcl
eanedmy
sel
ffor
t
hewhol
eweekandIhav
en’
tdown
any
thi
ngnorhav
eIt
akenmypi
l
ls.I
knowt
hatj
usti
rr
esponsi
bleofmebut
heyI
’
mjustex
haust
edokayI
’
m
emot
ional
l
y,phy
sical
l
yandment
all
y
ex
haust
edf
rom al
lthi
sdr
amaand
const
antpai
ninmyl
i
fe.Ij
ustwant
peace,
canIhav
epeacepl
ease.She
pul
l
sthebl
anket
saway
“
Mom!
”
“
Mir
apl
easeIcan’
twat
chy
oudr
owni
ng
l
i
ket
his.I
t’
ski
l
li
ngmebabypl
easet
ell
mewhatIshoul
ddo?
”Herv
oicei
s
br
eaki
ng,
it’
staki
ngsomuchofhernot
t
obr
eakdown.Iknowseei
ngmel
i
ke
t
hisi
sbr
eaki
ngherapar
tbecausei
t’
s
act
ual
l
yherf
ir
stwi
tnessi
ngmei
nthi
s
st
ate.
“
Not
hingMom,
justl
etmebepl
ease”
“
Ican’
tOkay
,youar
emydaught
er.I
hav
etodosomet
hingbutIdon’
tknow
whatandy
ouar
enotmeet
ingmehal
f
way
”
“
Iwi
l
lbef
inemom andpl
easedon’
t
wor
ryIwon’
tki
l
lmy
sel
f”Iov
erhear
ddad
t
ell
i
nghersheshoul
dkeepaney
eonme
soshe’
sscar
edandIhat
ethatI
’
m
sui
cidal
.Herscentf
il
lsmynost
ri
lsas
shewr
apsmei
nherar
ms.
“
Tal
ktomeatl
eastmyMi
racl
e”
“
Andsaywhatmom?
”
“
Any
thi
ngi
nyourmi
nd,
tel
lmehowy
ou
f
eel
”Isi
gh
“
I’
m scar
edmamawhati
fwenev
erf
ind
t
hem?
”Iconf
ess
“
OhmybabyKhuz
ani
wil
lfi
ndt
hem he’
s
doi
ngev
ery
thi
nghecan.Hef
oundy
ou
hewi
l
lal
sof
indKamar
iadon’
twor
ry”
“
Itt
ookhi
m 4y
ear
smom,
whati
fmama
asksSpi
dert
ohel
pherescapet
he
count
ryt
heyar
efami
l
yri
ghtandSpi
der
wi
l
ldoany
thi
ngt
ohur
tus.OhGodmy
moonl
i
ght
.Howcoul
dmom dot
hist
o
me?Iknowt
hatIwasnev
eri
nvol
vedi
n
r
aisi
ngKamar
iaandshewasbutLor
d
knowshowmuchIwant
edt
otakepar
t
i
nrai
singmydaught
er,
itwashar
d
mama.Iwasscar
ed,
brokenand
conf
used.Ir
ememberhowsheuset
o
cr
ywhenIwashol
dingheri
nmyar
ms
andmom sai
dbabi
escansensei
fthei
r
mot
her
sar
enotokayemot
ional
l
y.Her
cr
ywasbr
eaki
ngmyhear
tint
otwo
hal
vesandIknewt
hatIwasf
arf
rom
bei
ngal
ri
ghtemot
ional
l
ysoIal
l
owed
mamat
obehandsonandt
akecar
eof
mymoonl
i
ght
.Iwant
edmydaught
ert
o
f
eel
lov
e,war
mthandcar
ethatIknewI
wasn’
tgoi
ngt
obeabl
etogi
veheri
n
t
hatst
ateIwasdoest
hatmakemea
badmom?Doy
out
hinkImadeawr
ong
deci
sionbyal
l
owi
ngmom t
odo
ev
ery
thi
ngandnev
ergav
emy
sel
fa
chancet
olear
nhowt
otakeofmy
daught
erIhav
enev
erev
enchangedher
di
aper
smamadoy
out
hinkI
’
ma
hor
ri
blemom”
“
Ohmybabynoy
ouar
enotabadmom.
Youdi
dwhatbestatt
hatt
imef
ormy
gr
anddaught
er.Youknewy
ouwoul
dn’
t
managet
ocopet
otakecar
eofherand
I
’
m gl
adt
hatCabangi
l
ewast
her
efor
y
ouandmygr
anddaught
er.I
’
m pr
oudof
y
ousweet
hear
tfut
hingi
yakut
handa
y
ezwa”(
andIl
ovey
ou)Iwi
pemyt
ear
s
butt
heykeepf
all
i
ngonherbr
east
“
Idon’
tknowhowIsur
viv
edt
he4y
our
s
wi
thouty
ou,
woman.Youknowt
he4
y
ear
sIspentwi
thouty
ou,
Ireal
i
zedt
hat
Iwi
l
lnev
erber
eadyt
olosey
ou.I
mi
ssedy
ouev
erysi
ngl
edaymommy
.I
knowt
hatourr
elat
ionshi
pisnotwhati
t
usedt
obebef
ore,
ever
ythi
ngchanged
af
tert
heabusebutmywi
shi
stowor
k
oni
t.Imi
ssy
oumom,
Imi
ssourgossi
p
aboutauntNomaandheri
nlaws”We
gi
ggl
e
“
Imi
ssj
oki
ngar
oundwi
thy
ou,
Imi
ss
ourpamper
ingsessi
ons,
Imi
ssl
i
steni
ng
t
oyour
eadi
ngabookf
orme,
Imi
ss
si
ngi
ngt
oget
her
,Imi
ssbi
ngi
ngon
Net
fl
ixandst
uff
ingour
sel
veswi
thj
unk,
I
mi
sscooki
ngwi
thy
ou,
Imi
ssour
shoppi
ngsessi
ons,
Imi
ssmat
chi
ng
cl
otheswi
thy
ou,
Imi
ssdr
inki
ngwi
ne
wi
thy
ouev
ent
houghy
ouenduphav
ing
t
hebot
tl
ebyy
our
sel
fandl
etmehav
e
onegl
ass”Ichuckl
easmymi
nddr
if
tto
t
hosebeaut
if
ulmoment
s
“
Imi
ssusmom”shesni
ff
sshe’
scr
ying
ohmypoormommy
.
“
I’
m sor
rysweet
hear
t,i
t’
sal
lmyf
aul
t
t
hatwesomehowdr
if
tedapar
t.I
pr
omi
set
hatIwi
l
lnev
erev
eral
l
ow
any
thi
ngt
ocomebet
weenusdoy
ou
hearme”
“
Yesmama”
“
It
’sy
ou,
meandKamar
iaal
ltheway
”I
smi
l
efai
ntl
y
“
Doy
out
hinkt
heywi
l
lbef
ound?
”
“
Ofcour
seIt
rustK”
“
Kwho’
sthatnow?
”
“
Khuz
ani
”mmmkKneh
“
Baby
”
“
Mommy
”
“
Cany
oudomeaf
avour
?”
“
Any
thi
ngf
ory
oumom”
“
Let
’sgohav
elunchatanypl
acey
ou
want
”Thi
swomant
hough
“
Pleasebabyj
usty
ouandme”Isi
gh
“
Okayl
et’
s”
“
Thanky
ousomuchnowl
et’
sgety
ou
cl
eanedup”shehel
pmeoutoft
hebed
andgui
demet
othebat
hroom.I
t’
shal
f
anhourl
atewear
edoneandr
eadyt
o
go.
“
Ani
sebahl
enj
ebant
wanabami
”(y
’al
l
ar
ebeaut
if
ulmychi
l
dren)Gogosay
s
“
Thanky
ou”Mom andIsayatt
het
ime.
“
Wewi
l
lseey
ouMama”mom say
s
“
Okaysi
s”Weheadoutanddr
ivet
othe
mal
l
.Mom i
ssi
ngi
ngal
onggospel
.
“
Don’
tyouhav
ebet
termusi
c?”
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thGospel
?”
“
Bor
ing”
“
Weeeawaz
ilut
hoy
azwena”
“
ThankGodIhav
emyownear
s”
“
Unf
ort
unat
elyt
hisi
sthemusi
cIhav
e
her
e”
“
Remi
ndmet
obr
ingmyphonenex
t
t
imey
err
r,y
azKhumal
ohadt
ast
ewhen
i
tcamet
omusi
c”Shel
aughs
“
Ohpl
easeKhumal
owasl
i
steni
ngt
o
Sj
avawhol
i
stent
oSj
avav
ele”Il
augh
“
Mom y
ouar
ejeal
ousSj
avadoesi
tfor
al
mostev
ery
one”
“
Hai
sukamay
bei
fhecancuthi
shai
r
andt
ri
m hi
sbear
edhewi
l
lsi
ngbet
ter
”I
bur
sti
ntol
aught
er
“
Youar
esomeanmama”Shegi
ggl
es.
Ther
estoft
hedr
ivei
sfi
l
ledwi
thj
okes
andl
aught
er.IchooseMcDonal
d’sI
can’
tremembert
hel
astIat
ether
e.
GoshImi
sst
hei
rfr
ies.Wear
esi
tt
ing
andwai
ti
ngf
orourf
ood.
“
Mama”
“
Baby
”
“
Ilov
eyounev
erdoubtt
hatandal
way
s
knowt
haty
ouar
ethebestmommyi
n
t
hewhol
ewor
ld.
”
“
Ohbaby
”shet
akesmyhandsi
ntoher
s
andki
ssest
hem.Herphoner
ingsso
shel
etsgoofmyhands
“
K..
.I
’
m okayy
ou….
.shewi
l
lbeokay
,I
managedt
ogetheroutofbedt
odaywe
att
hemal
l
….y
eahI
’
m al
sohappy
….K!
”
Shegi
ggl
es“
Imi
ssy
out
oo…sur
e….
”she
l
aughs“
okaysor
ryby
eDaddyK”HeheI
wasst
il
lsur
pri
sedbyKkant
ither
e’sal
so
DaddyK.I
’
m shook!
“
Uhm wher
ewer
ewe”Icanhearasmi
l
e
i
nherv
oice.Ourf
oodcomesandwedi
g
i
n
“
SoDaddyKhuh”Shecoughscausi
ng
met
olaugh
“
Uthusway
ini
?”
“
Let
’seatt
hef
oodi
sget
ti
ngcol
d”I
l
augh
“
YouknowIl
ovemybur
ger
scol
dunl
i
ke
y
ouwhowantt
hem war
m sot
ell
me
howdi
dyougett
oDaddyKam Iwr
ong
t
othi
nky
oushoul
dhat
ethi
sman
becausehe’
sbehi
ndev
ery
thi
ngt
hat
happened”Ihearherar
eleasi
ngasi
gh
“
Youar
eri
ghtsweet
hear
t”Shel
etmeon
howshewasi
nsul
ti
nghi
m ev
erydaybut
henev
erst
oppedshowi
ngsuppor
tand
r
emor
se.
“
Isee”
“
Iwanty
out
ogi
vehi
m achancebaby
pl
ease,
Iwon’
tfor
cey
out
oaccepthi
m
butal
i
ttl
echancewon’
thur
t”Isi
gh
“
Iseehemeansal
ott
oyou”
“
Ithi
nkIl
ovehi
m”Ichuckl
e
“
Yout
hink”
“
Idon’
tknowMi
raal
loft
hisi
sscar
ing
me”
“
Whendi
dyout
wost
artdat
ingkant
i?”
“
Aweekandf
ewday
sago”
“
Sof
or4y
ear
syouhav
en’
thadsex
”
“
Aywenauy
abhedamanj
e”Igi
ggl
e
“
Iwasj
ustaski
ngmom I
’
m sur
eyouar
e
v
irgi
nnow”
“
Ngi
kukhabe!
”Ichor
tl
e.
Idi
dn’
tthi
nkIwi
l
lenj
oyspendi
ngt
ime
wi
thmymom l
i
ket
his.She’
sreal
l
y
l
i
ght
ingupmymood.Oncewear
edone
wi
theat
ingwegot
owat
chamov
ie,
af
termov
iesweheadbackhome.The
f
reshai
risr
eal
l
ywhatIneeded.If
eel
a
l
otbet
ternowt
hankst
omommy
dear
est
.It
’sar
ound7pm andIdeci
det
o
hav
eanear
lyni
ght
.Ihearmyphone
r
ingi
ngasI
’
m deepi
ntomysl
umber
.I
cur
seandansweri
t
“
Yini
”(What
)
“
Iwokey
ouup”myhear
tski
psabeatat
t
hesoundofhi
svoi
ce
“
Yes”
“
I’
m sor
rypl
easeopent
hewi
ndow”
“
Huh”
“
Openy
ourbedr
oom wi
ndowDol
l
face”I
r
oll
outofbedandf
indmywayt
othe
wi
ndow.Iopeni
tandhi
sscentf
il
lsmy
nost
ri
lsmaki
ngmeweaki
ntheknees.
“
Lwenkosi
,whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”
I
t’
scomesoutasawhi
sper
.Hi
s
pr
esencet
akesmybr
eat
haway
.
“
Mov
easi
deIwantt
ojumpi
n”Thi
sboy
i
scr
azybutIdoashesay
s.The
momenthei
sinsi
dehepul
l
smei
nhi
s
ar
msandhol
dmef
ordearl
i
fe
“
Imi
ssy
ousomuch”Ihol
dhi
mti
ght
ly
l
i
keIwi
l
lnev
erl
ethi
m go.He’
staki
ngal
l
myscenti
nhi
snost
ri
ls.
“
Imi
ssy
out
oo”Hepul
l
smebackand
pl
ant
sapeckonmyf
orehead.
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
eint
hemi
ddl
e
oft
heni
ght
?”Ihal
fshout
“
Don’
tshouty
ourmom andgr
annywi
l
l
hearus.I
t’
snoti
nthemi
ddl
eoft
he
ni
ghti
t’
s11:
00pm”
“
Hay
imaanLwenkosi
,youcan’
t
di
sappearonmef
oraweekandcome
backsungenangamawi
ndow”Hesi
ghs
“
I’
m sor
ryaboutt
hatsweet
hear
t.
”He
scoopsmeupandpl
acesmei
nthebed
“
Iwi
l
llocky
ourdoorj
ustt
obesaf
e”He
say
swal
ki
ngawayt
henhecomesback.
I
’
m notsur
ewhathe’
sdoi
ngbutf
ew
secondsIhearhi
m get
ti
ngnex
ttome
andpul
lmet
ohi
sbar
echest
.I
r
emembert
hathecan’
tsl
eepwi
th
cl
othesonwai
tdoesi
tmeanhe’
s
sl
eepi
ngher
e?
“
Lwenkosi
don’
ttel
lmey
ouar
epl
anni
ng
t
osl
eepher
e”
”
Iwi
l
lleav
ebef
orey
ourmom andgr
ams
wakesup.
”
“
Noy
oucan’
tdot
hat
”
“
Pleasedon’
tmakemego”Isi
gh
honest
lyIhav
emi
ssedhi
m somuch.
“
Youbet
termakesur
emymom orgogo
doesn’
tseey
ou”
“
Ofcour
sesweet
hear
t”West
ayi
nthat
posi
ti
oni
nsi
l
ence.Icanf
eel
hishear
t
beat
inghar
dagai
nstmyhead
“
Youcanheari
t?”
“
Hearwhat
?”
“
Myhear
t,howhar
dit
’sbeat
ing?
”
“
Yes”
“
It
’sdoest
hatwhenI
’
m onl
ywi
thy
ou”
“
Lwe….
”
“
Shhi
t’
sokay
”Comf
ort
abl
esi
l
ence
passesusagai
nunt
ilhebr
eaksi
t
“
I’
m sor
ryf
orl
eav
ingl
i
ket
hatandnev
er
gi
vi
ngy
ouachancet
oex
plai
nnott
hat
y
ouowemeanyex
planat
ionbutIwoul
d
hav
eappr
eci
atedi
fyout
oldme”Isi
gh
“
IknowandI
’
m sor
ryy
ouhadt
ofound
outl
i
ket
hat
.Iwasgoi
ngt
otel
lyou
Lwenkosi
Icoul
dn’
tuset
hatdaywe
spentt
oget
hert
otel
lyou.I
twoul
dhav
e
r
uinedt
hespeci
almomentwehad
t
oget
heraf
ter4y
ear
swi
thoutseei
ng
eachot
her
.”Heheav
esasi
gh
“
Iwon’
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emydol
l
faceIf
eltmyhear
t
shr
eddi
ngi
ntopi
ecesbutar
eal
i
zat
ion
hi
tmehar
dthati
fonl
yIwasupf
ront
wi
thy
out
hemomentIf
ell
inl
ovewi
th
y
ounoneoft
hiswoul
dhav
ehappened.
I
fIdi
dn’
thur
tyou,
youwoul
dn’
thav
ehad
t
ofi
ndcomf
orti
nanot
herman’
sar
ms.
I
t’
sal
lonmekut
hiwauz
enz
il
e
akakhal
elwa.
”Hechuckl
esbi
tt
erl
y
“
Don’
tbl
amey
our
sel
fformymi
stakes
Lwenkosi
.I’
mtheonewhoshoul
dn’
t
hav
esl
eptwi
thmal
umeSox
.Ihur
tyou
sobadandI
’
m sor
ryf
ort
hat
”
“
Mir
awhyar
eyoudownpl
ayi
ngy
our
f
eel
i
ngs?Ihur
tyouf
ir
standIdeser
ved
t
hat
….”
“
Lwenkosi
…”Hecut
smeshot
“
Hay
iMi
raIl
ovehowsel
fl
essy
ouar
e
buti
t’
sannoy
ingsomet
imes!You
al
way
sputot
herpeopl
e’
sfeel
i
ngs
bef
orey
our
s,y
oual
way
sapol
ogi
zeev
en
wheny
ouar
enotsupposedt
oapol
ogi
ze.
Lal
elast
handwasami
youdon’
towe
any
oneany
thi
ngv
ha?Don’
ttakeot
her
peopl
e’
sfaul
tsandpai
nti
tony
ou.You
ar
enotJesusangekeuf
elei
zono
z
abany
eabant
u.Acknowl
edgey
our
mi
stakesonl
ydon’
ttaket
hef
all
when
i
t’
sunnecessar
y.Puty
our
sel
ffi
rst
bef
oreany
oneel
se.Iwon’
tsi
ther
eand
cr
uci
fyy
ouf
orsl
eepi
ngwi
thSoxas
muchasi
thur
tme,
whenIknowI
’
m al
so
notper
fect
.Ihav
emyweaknesses
whi
char
edr
ugs.Wedeal
wit
hpai
n
di
ff
erent
lybutwhat
’si
mpor
tanti
sforus
t
obeawar
eoft
heconsequencest
hen
makeadeci
sioni
fthat
’showwewantt
o
deal
wit
hourpai
n.Yazt
hewayIwasso
angr
yatdadwhenhecheat
edonmama
butIwasangr
ieratmom f
orf
orgi
vi
ng
hi
m.Thedayy
ouwal
kedi
nmyl
i
fe,
you
changedt
hewayIv
iewt
hingsi
nmor
e
way
sthanone.Youmademer
eal
i
ze
t
hatwheny
oul
ovesomeoney
oul
ook
bey
ondt
hei
rfl
awsanddi
sabi
l
iti
es.You
l
ovet
hei
rnakedsoul
wit
houtany
l
i
mit
ati
ons.
”Wowt
hatwasmout
hful
“
I’
m sor
ryt
hatIdi
sappear
edony
ouf
ora
weekIcani
magi
newhaty
ouar
egoi
ng
t
hroughr
ightnowbutIwanty
out
o
knowt
hatI
’
m her
efory
oual
way
sjust
l
eanonme.It
rustmyuncl
etobr
ing
backt
hel
i
ttl
eonesaf
eandsound.
”Oh
boyIswearmyhear
tmel
ts
“
Thanky
ousomuchcuddl
ecakes,
you
hav
enoI
deahowmuchi
tmeanst
ome
t
oheart
hatcomi
ngf
rom y
ou”
“
Ist
il
lgoty
ouy
ezwa”Inodwi
thmyhead
andheki
ssesmyf
orehead
“
What
’shername?
”
“
Kamar
ia”
“
Whatdoest
hatmean”
“
Bri
ghtasamoonorl
i
keamoon”
“
Beaut
if
ulname.Ourmoonl
i
ghtwi
l
l
comeback”Ican’
thel
pagr
int
hat
br
eaksacr
ossmyf
ace,
Iwantt
oask
hi
m abouthi
sgi
rl
fr
iendbutIdon’
twant
t
ospoi
lthi
smomentl
etmej
ustenj
oyi
t.
If
eel
hisf
inger
srunni
ngt
hroughmyhai
r
causi
ngmet
omoan.
“
Don’
tmoan”
“
Buti
tfeel
ssogoodnj
e”
“
Wedon’
twantt
owaket
hesnakedo
we”Igi
ggl
eandf
iddl
emyhandunder
bl
anket
stogett
hef
eel
ofhi
ssnakei
t’
s
beeny
ear
sIev
enf
orgothowi
tfeel
sli
ke.
IgaspwhenIgethol
dofi
t,damnhe’
s
har
dandf
eel
sbi
ggert
hant
hel
astt
imeI
f
elti
t.Hemoanssof
tl
y.
“
Cuddl
ecakes”
“
Mmh”
“
Thanks”
“
Forwhat
?”
“
Forcomi
ngandbei
ngher
e,i
treal
l
y
meansal
ott
ome”
“
I’
vegoty
ou”Heki
ssesmyhai
rIhol
don
t
ohi
mfordearl
i
fel
i
steni
ngt
othebeat
ofhi
shear
t.Thi
sfeel
sgood,
Iwi
shi
t
canl
astf
orev
er.If
eel
mysel
ffal
l
ingi
nto
sl
umberashehi
sfi
nger
smassagesmy
scul
p.
“
Mir
a!Baby
!Mi
ra!
!”
I
’
m wokenupbymom bangi
ngmydoor
mi
ndy
ouI
’
m wr
appedi
nLwenkosi
’
s
ar
ms.He’
sev
ensnor
ingl
i
ght
ly.
“
Mama!
”
“
Babyy
ouar
eokay
?”
“
Yesmama,
I’
mfi
ne”
“
Whyt
hedoori
slockedopenup”oh
God
“
Uhm okay
!”IshakeLwenkosi
“
Mmh”
“
Youneedt
ogomom wantt
ogeti
n”He
mumbl
esi
ncoher
entt
hings.
“
Lwenkosi
pleasewakeup”Hedoest
he
samet
hinggoshIf
eel
li
kepunchi
nghi
m.
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
thehousei
sbur
ning”
Iwhi
speri
nhi
searhej
umps,
Ilaugh
sof
tl
y
“
Arghmaanbabyy
azbengi
phupha
kamnandi
kanj
anbengi
sat
hingi
yal
i
faka
l
akuwe”Hesoundsmad,
Igi
ggl
e
“
Sor
rybutmom i
sout
sidey
ouneedgo
pl
ease”
“
Mir
awhat
’st
aki
ngsol
ong?
”Mom say
s
“
Shi
t!
”Hecur
seandIhearhi
mjumpi
ng
of
fthebedt
ogetdr
essedofcour
se.
“
Hav
eabeaut
if
uldayl
i
key
our
sel
fMi
ss
Mt
himkhul
uandknowt
hatI
’
mjusta
phonecal
laway
”
“
Thanky
oucuddl
ecakes”Hepl
ant
sa
peckonmyl
i
ps
“
Bye”WhydoIf
eel
sadnowt
hathe’
s
goi
ng.WhatwasIex
pect
ingar
ghIr
oll
outofbedandf
indmywayt
othedoor
andunl
ocki
t.Themomentshewal
ksi
n
shesqueez
esmei
nherar
ms.
“
Gody
ouscar
edme”
“
Itol
dyounj
ethatIwon’
tki
l
lmy
sel
f,y
ou
hav
etor
elaxmommy
”
“
Younev
erl
ocky
ourdoor
”
“
Uhm wel
lyeah”
“
Sowhywasy
ourdoorl
ocked”
“
Uhm I
..
Iwant
edt
oseei
fthekeyi
sst
il
l
wor
kingy
ouknowl
i
kei
tcanst
il
ll
ock
y
ouknow”whatast
upi
dex
cuse.
“
NoIdon’
tknow,
Mir
apl
easedon’
tdo
somet
hingst
upi
dmychi
l
d”
“
Iwon’
tmom t
rustme”
“
Breakf
asti
sready
”
“
Letmewashmyf
aceandbr
ushmy
t
eet
h”guesswhat
,shegui
demet
othe
bat
hroom andwat
chmewashmyf
ace
andbr
ushmyt
eet
h.NowIf
eel
real
l
y
badt
hatshet
hinksIwaspl
anni
ngt
oki
l
l
my
sel
f.OnceI
’
m donewi
thev
ery
thi
ng
wemakeourwayt
othedi
ningr
oom
“
Nunuz
a”
“
Mor
ningGogo”Isi
tdownandmom
di
shesupf
ormeandgi
vesmemyf
ood
“
Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ngt
odaysi
s?”
“
I’
m okayIguess”
“
Godi
swi
thusal
way
shav
efai
th”we
eati
nov
eral
i
ghtchat
ter
.It
hinkI
’
m
sl
owl
ybutsur
elyl
ett
inggoofmyanger
t
owar
dsgogo.Wehearabuz
zerand
mom say
sshewi
l
lat
tendi
t.Seconds
l
aterIheardad’
sandmal
umeK’
svoi
ces
bef
oret
heymaket
hei
rwayi
n.
“
Mommy
!”myhear
tleapwi
thj
oy.I
st
andupi
nthatmoment
.Shet
hrows
her
sel
finmyar
msIpi
ckherupand
pl
antki
ssesal
lov
erherf
acemaki
ngher
gi
ggl
e
“
Pumpki
nmommymi
ssedy
ouso
much!
”
“
Imi
ssy
out
oomommy
”Ibr
eat
hei
nher
babyscentohl
ordt
hanky
ou.
“
Wef
oundt
hem sweet
hear
t”
“
Thanky
ouDaddy
.Wher
e’smom?
”
“
She’
sashamedt
ocomeher
ebutIwi
l
l
br
ingherl
ater
”
“
Pleaset
ell
hert
hatshehasnot
hingt
o
beashamedof
,wet
rul
yunder
stand”
mom say
s
“
She’
ssobeaut
if
ulmaan,
hel
l
oKami
na
comet
okhokho”Gogosay
stoKamar
ia
“
Whoar
eyou?
”Yept
hat
’smyl
i
ttl
eloud
mout
h
”
She’
smymom’
smommy
.”
“
Yourmom t
hescar
yone”Ichuckl
e
“
Whydoy
ousayshe’
sscar
y?”
“
Shewasangr
yandscr
eami
ng,
she’
s
scar
yli
keadr
agonmommy
”Igi
ggl
e
“
Heysweet
hear
tgr
andmadi
dn’
tmeant
t
oscar
eyouokay
.Shel
ovesy
ouso
much,
I’
m sor
ry”mom say
s
“
It
’sokayIf
orgi
vey
oubecausey
ouar
e
mydr
agongr
anny
”Wel
augh
“
Comet
oKhokhoKami
na”Gogosay
s
“
I’
m notKami
na,
I’
m Kamar
ia”Weshar
e
l
aught
er
“
Ohsor
rynunu”
“
Got
ogr
eetmygogo”
“
IzaKhami
na”
“
I’
m Kamar
ianotKami
na.SayKa.
”
“
Ka”gogosay
saf
ter
“
ma.
”
“
ma”
“
ri
a”
“
na”
“
Nooooor
ainotnasayr
ai”
“
Na”Idon’
tknowi
fgogoi
sdoi
ngi
ton
pur
poseorsher
eal
l
ycan’
tsayi
tatt
hat
momentmydaught
eri
sir
ri
tat
edasf
uck
whi
l
ewear
egi
ggl
i
ng
“
Muuj
i
zaunj
ani
kant
iugogowakho”We
ar
edeadwi
thl
aught
er.Youseehowshe
j
ustl
i
ght
supev
ery
thi
ng.
CHAPTER45

“
Howi
smyher
otoday
?”Hel
ooksatme
andf
lashesoneofhi
skneesweakeni
ng
smi
l
e.
“
I’
m okayandy
oumyj
aan?
”
“
I’
m bey
ondhappyy
oukeepf
ulf
il
li
ngmy
j
arofhappi
nessMri
tsov
erf
lowi
ngr
ight
now”
“
Youmi
ghtaswel
lgetawhol
eJoj
otank
becauseI
t’
sonl
ythebegi
nni
ng”Igi
ggl
e
“
Joj
otankhuh”Henodswi
ggl
i
nghi
s
ey
ebr
ows.Iswearhemakesmegi
ddy
l
i
keat
eenager
.Het
akesmyhandi
nto
hi
sandki
ssesi
t
“
Thanky
ouf
orf
indi
ngmy
gr
anddaught
erIdon’
tknowwhatIwoul
d
hav
edonewi
thouty
ou.
”
“
It
’smyj
obsnookumst
otakecar
eof
ourf
ami
l
y”Icanthel
pagr
int
hatbr
eaks
acr
ossmyl
i
ps.Hel
ooksdeepi
ntomy
ey
esasi
fhe’
ssear
chi
ngf
ormynaked
soul
.
“
Youar
esobeaut
if
ulNokubonga”I
ts
f
eel
swei
rdy
etsobeaut
if
ulhear
inghi
m
say
ingmyf
ull
name
“
Youar
enotbady
our
sel
fMrMsi
mango”
“
Ohpl
easewomanj
ustsayi
tngi
muhl
eI
know”Hesay
swi
thsomuchpr
ideand
conf
idenceIcanthel
pbutl
augh
“
Youar
eful
lofy
our
sel
f”
“
It
’scal
l
edsel
fconf
idence”
“
It
sact
ual
l
ycal
l
edar
rogance”
“
I…”Hi
sphonedi
stur
bshi
mfr
om
f
ini
shi
nghi
ssent
ence.Het
akesi
tand
answeri
t.
“
Sur
e..
.what
?..
.howdi
dthathappened!
..
.
y
azuy
isahl
amasot
huv
iwena!Nx
”He
hangsup.I
’
mtempt
edt
olaughi
siphi
esi
nyei
sihl
amangaphandl
ekwesot
huv
i
buthe’
sangr
yIdon’
twantt
omakehi
m
mor
eangr
y.
“
Heywhat
’swr
ong”
“
It
’snot
hingIcan’
thandl
e.Ineedt
ogo”
Hepl
aceshi
shandont
hesi
deofmy
f
aceandIcl
osemyey
esmoment
ari
l
y
l
eani
ngagai
nsti
t.
“
Thanky
ouonceagai
n”Hepul
l
smeby
myneckandcl
aim myl
i
ps.Ohhi
s
ki
ssesal
way
sleav
esmewetand
pant
ingf
orme.
“
Goandbondwi
thy
ourgr
anddaught
erI
wi
l
lcal
lyoul
ater
”
“
Okay
”Isaybr
eat
hlessl
yI’
m st
il
l
r
ecov
eri
ngf
rom t
heki
ss.Hechuckl
es
andgetoutofhi
scart
oopenmydoor
.I
st
epoutcar
eful
l
yandhecl
osesi
tbef
ore
al
l
owi
ngmet
osi
nki
nhi
sar
ms.
“
Ilov
eyou”Hesay
s,Ipul
lback
“
Dri
vesaf
e”
“
Alway
s”Heki
ssesmyf
oreheadt
hen
wat
chesmewal
ktot
hegat
eandmake
mywayi
n,headi
ngt
othehouse.I
’
m
wel
comedbyKamar
ia’
sgi
ggl
esasMi
ra
t
ickl
esher
.
“
Muuj
i
za.
..st
op.
..
it
!”shesay
sbet
ween
hergi
ggl
esbutMi
rai
shear
ingnone.I
smi
l
ethi
sissobeaut
if
ul.
“
Dragon.
.gr
andma.
.Muuj
i
za.
.is.
.
t
ickl
i
ng.
.me”shesay
sbr
eat
hlessl
y
“
Hay
imaanMi
rast
opt
ickl
i
ngmy
gr
anddaught
er”shest
opsandcuddl
e
herdaught
er
“
Mal
umeKi
sgone”
“
Yes”IsayasImakemywayt
othem
andj
oint
hem.
“
Heseemsgoodi
nfi
ndi
ngmi
ssi
ng
peopl
ehey
”
“
Yeahhei
s..
.comeher
ebabygi
rl
”Isay
t
oKamar
ia’
s,shewi
ggl
esher
sel
foutof
hermom’
sembr
aceandcomest
ome.I
pi
ckherupandpul
lhert
omyl
apbef
ore
squeez
ingheri
ntomyar
ms.Tear
s
pr
ickl
esi
nmyey
es.I
t’
shur
tst
hatIl
ost4
y
ear
soft
hei
rli
fe.
“
Youar
esqueez
ingmet
oot
ightdr
agon
gr
anny
”Ichuckl
eandpul
lherback.
“
Usi
l
iadr
agongr
anny
”Shewi
pesmy
t
eart
hathadescapedwi
thhert
iny
hands
“
It
’sokayy
oucansqueez
emeast
ight
asy
ouwantt
hen”Ismi
l
eandmyt
ear
s
f
all
inv
olunt
ari
l
y.
“
Muuj
i
zagr
annyi
scr
ying”Thepai
nin
herv
oicecan’
tbemi
ssedi
sn’
tshecut
e
“
I’
m notcr
yingbecauseI
m hur
t
sweet
hear
tbutI
’
m happyt
omeety
ou”
shesmi
l
eswi
del
yshe’
ssobeaut
if
uland
shel
ooksex
act
lyl
i
keMi
ra.
“
I’
m al
sohappymydr
agongr
anny
,
mommy
’shear
twasal
way
ssor
e
becauseshemi
ssedy
ousomuch”oh
l
ordt
hischi
l
disj
ustmaki
ngme
emot
ional
njeshe’
ssoador
abl
eand
smar
t.
“
Imi
ssedy
oubot
hsomuch.
..
Ilov
eyou
pr
incess”
“
Ilov
eyout
oodr
agongr
anny
”Ichuckl
e
andhugher
.
“
She’
ssobeaut
if
uli
sn’
tshe?
”Mi
rasay
s
“
Yesi
nsi
deandout
sidey
ouar
ebl
essed
mychi
l
d.Shej
ustr
emi
ndsmeofy
ou
wheny
ouwer
eababy
.She‘
syour
r
epl
i
caonewoul
dsweary
oumadeher
al
one”Iseeasmi
l
eonmydaught
erI
hav
en’
tseenev
ersi
nceshecameback.
Youcant
ell
thatt
hisl
i
ttl
eoneher
eisher
wor
ld.
“
WhatdoesKamar
iameans”
“
Bri
ghtasmoonorl
i
keamoon”
“
Beaut
if
ul”Mymom j
oinsusandwe
spendt
hewhol
edayt
oget
herbondi
ng.I
hav
emy3f
avor
it
egi
rl
sri
ghtnex
ttome,
pr
icel
essmomentev
erIt
ell
you.I
tsj
ust
af
terIf
ini
shedcooki
ngsupperwi
tht
he
“
hel
p”ofmygr
anddaught
erwhenMr
andMr
sMwangi
arr
ives.
“
Mommy
!”Kamar
iascr
eamsandhugs
Cabangi
l
e’sl
egswhohepi
ckherupand
ki
ssesher
“
Heybabyar
eyougood?
”
“
YesIwascooki
ngwi
thMuuj
i
za’
s
mom.
..meetmydr
agongr
anny
mommy
”shepoi
ntsatmewi
thhert
iny
f
inger
.
“
Hel
l
oKam’
sdr
agongr
anny
”Weshar
e
l
aught
er
“
Pleasecomet
hissi
de”Il
eadt
hem t
o
t
hel
i
vingr
oom andt
hemomentmy
mom’
sey
esl
ayonCabaangerf
lashes
acr
ossherf
ace.Igi
veheraney
eIhope
shedoesn’
tcausedr
amaI
’
m notupf
or
i
t.Wesi
tdownandt
heMwangi
’
sgr
eet
mymom andMi
ra.
“
Idon’
tknowwher
etobegi
nI’
m so
ashamed.Muuj
i
zamychi
l
dIapol
ogi
ze
f
ort
hepai
nIputy
out
hroughIwasn’
t
t
hinki
ng.Iwassoscar
edt
olosey
ou
guy
sandI
…”shebur
sti
ntot
ear
s
“
It
’sokaysi
s”Ipul
lhert
omyar
mssi
nce
I
’
m si
tt
ingnex
ttoher
“
Noi
t’
snotokaywhatIdi
dwassel
fi
sh
andcr
uel
!Howcoul
dIputy
ouguy
s
t
hrought
hisespeci
all
ytoy
ouMuuj
i
za
af
terIwat
chedy
oumychi
l
ddr
owni
ngi
n
depr
essi
onandknowi
ngt
hatKamar
iai
s
y
ouronl
yreasonwhyar
eyouhol
dingon
t
oli
fe.I
’
m nodi
ff
erentf
rom Skhumbuz
o.
Iwantt
oapol
ogi
zef
rom t
hedeepestof
myhear
t.
”If
eel
fort
hiswomanr
eal
l
y.I
can’
tev
enbegi
ntoi
magi
nehowi
t’
sli
ke
t
onotbeabl
etodooneoft
hemost
i
mpor
tantt
hingy
ouar
esupposedt
odo
asawoman
“
It
’sokaymom Ir
eal
l
yunder
stoodt
he
pai
nyouar
egr
owi
ngt
hroughandIwant
y
out
oknowt
hatnot
hingi
sgoi
ngt
o
change.Wear
est
il
lyourchi
l
drenas
muchaswear
emoms.Your
aisedusas
y
ourchi
l
drenandf
ort
hatIwi
l
lfor
ever
begr
atef
ulmom.Yazsomewomanout
t
her
efai
ltol
ovet
hei
rownchi
l
drenand
someabusest
hem buty
oumama.
.y
ou
gav
eusal
lyourbestl
oveamot
her
coul
dgi
vet
oherchi
l
dren.Idon’
tknow
whatIwoul
dhav
edonewi
thouty
ou
mamaandy
oudad.Icamewi
tht
oo
muchbaggageanddangeri
nyourl
i
ves
butnev
ernotev
enoncehady
ou
compl
ained.Honest
lyi
twasbadenough
t
haty
ouhadt
otakecar
eofmeand
pr
otectmewhi
l
efear
ingf
ory
ourl
i
ves
kant
ither
ewasal
soanot
herbur
den
gr
owi
ngi
nmyt
ummy
.Itwasj
ustt
oo
muchnj
e”mydaught
ersay
s
“
Youwer
enev
erabaggagenorKamar
ia
wasMuuj
i
za.Youwer
eabl
essi
ng,
you
ar
est
il
labl
essi
ngi
nourl
i
ves.Yougav
e
usachancet
ofeel
par
ent
hoodbaby
andf
ort
hatwear
esogr
atef
ul.Iknow
t
hati
twi
l
lbehar
dfory
out
otr
ustme
af
tert
hisbutIwi
l
ldowhat
everi
t’
stakes
t
owi
nyourt
rustbackbaby
.Pl
ease
f
orgi
veme.
..
all
ofy
ouKhumal
ofami
l
yI
deepl
yapol
ogi
ze”
“
Wef
orgi
vey
ousi
swear
efami
l
ynow.I
cannev
ert
hanky
ouenoughf
orr
aisi
ng
mychi
l
drenasy
ourown.I
t’
sacr
uel
wor
ldoutwhenpeopl
ehel
pyou
nowaday
stheyt
urnt
ohav
eul
ter
ia
mot
ives”Isay
“
Truet
hatmama,
thanky
ousomuchf
or
r
emai
ningl
oyal
toy
our
sel
faswel
last
o
meandmydaught
er.Dady
ounev
ersaw
agi
rly
oucoul
duset
oful
fi
ll
yoursex
ual
desi
res.Mom y
ounev
ersawy
oursl
ave
orbabymaki
ngmachi
neconsi
der
ingt
he
si
tuat
ionathand.Yout
reat
edmel
i
kea
pr
incessandf
ort
hatngi
yabonga
kakhul
u.Mayt
hel
ordgr
anty
oubot
h
y
ourhear
tdesi
res.Il
ovey
ousomuch”
I
’
m apr
oudmom mydaught
erhas
gr
ownsomuch.Thi
smomentr
ighther
e
i
ssoemot
ional
andwear
eal
ltear
y
i
ncl
udi
ngmymom.
“
Okaynomor
etear
snowl
et’
sbehappy
.
Doy
ouwantany
thi
ngt
odr
inkMrand
Mr
sMwangi
”IsayasIwi
pemyt
ear
s
“
Nowear
efi
nesi
sthanky
ou”Caba
say
s
“
Okayatl
easthav
edi
nnerwi
thus”
“
Andnowear
enott
aki
ngnoasan
answer
”Mi
raadds
“
Ahwel
lwear
ehav
ingdi
nnerher
e”I
smi
l
e
“
Ican’
twai
ttot
ast
eKami
na’
scooki
ng”
“
I’
m notKami
naI
’
m Kamar
iaKhokho”
Shesay
scheeki
l
yandwebur
sti
nto
l
aught
er.at7pm Isetupt
hedi
ningt
abl
e
andwhenev
ery
thi
ngi
ssetIcal
l
ev
ery
oneandwegat
herar
oundt
he
t
abl
e.Mom gr
aceourf
oodIdi
shupf
or
mymom,
mysel
fandMi
rawhi
l
eCaba
di
shesupf
orherhusband,
Kamar
iaand
her
sel
f.Weeatov
erwar
m chat
ter
.I
knowIoncesai
dthi
sandI
’
m goi
ngt
o
r
epeat
,theMwangi
’
sar
egoodpeopl
e
shame.Oncewear
edoneIcol
l
ect
di
shesandCabai
nsi
stt
ohel
pmewash
t
hem.
“
Your
eal
l
ydon’
thav
eto”
“
ButIwantt
othanky
ouf
ory
our
ki
ndnessaf
terwhatIdi
danddi
nnerof
cour
se”Ismi
l
e
“
For
giv
eyour
sel
fandmov
eon”she
smi
l
esf
aint
ly.Comf
ort
abl
esi
l
ence
passesbyaswewasht
hedi
shes.I
’
m
washi
ngandshe’
swi
ping.
“
Youhav
eabeaut
if
uldaught
erandy
ou
shoul
dbepr
oudofy
our
sel
f”Ismi
l
e
“
YeahIam andal
lthepai
nand
compl
i
cat
ionsdur
ingt
hepr
egnancywas
wor
thi
t”
“
Icani
magi
ne”
“
I’
m sor
ryI
…”
“
Noy
oudon’
thav
etobesor
ryI
under
stand.JustbecauseIcan’
thav
e
chi
l
drendoesn’
tmeanIshoul
dget
of
fendedwhenmot
her
sshar
ethei
r
ex
per
iences.
”Isi
gh
“
What
’sr
eal
l
yist
hecondi
ti
oni
fyou
don’
tmi
ndmeaski
ng”
“
Iwasdi
agnosedwi
thendomet
ri
osi
s”
“
Soi
tcantbecur
ed”sheshakesher
headno.
“
Endomet
ri
osi
sisani
ncur
abl
ebut
manageabl
egy
necol
ogi
cal
condi
ti
on.
Endomet
ri
alt
issueconsi
stsofgl
and,
bl
oodcel
l
s,andconnect
ivet
issue.I
t
nor
mal
l
ygr
owsi
ntheut
erus,
topr
epar
e
t
hel
i
ningoft
hewombf
orov
ulat
ion.
Endomet
ri
ali
mpl
ant
sar
ebui
l
dupsof
endomet
ri
alt
issuet
hatgr
owi
n
l
ocat
ionsout
sidet
heut
erus.Whent
hey
gr
owout
sidet
heut
erus,
thi
siscal
l
ed
endomet
ri
osi
s.Theycandev
elop
any
wher
eint
hebody
,butt
heyusual
l
y
occuri
nthepel
vi
car
ea.Thet
reat
ment
wasn’
tef
fect
ivesoIhadt
ogounder
sur
ger
y”
“
I’
m sosor
rysi
s”
“
Youknowt
hedayIf
oundout
NokubongawhyJacobandIcoul
dn’
tfal
l
pr
egnantandt
hatwecan’
thav
echi
l
dren
nat
ural
l
yIwasbey
ondcr
ushed”she
bl
i
nksbackhert
ear
sandheav
esasi
gh
“
Thent
hedoct
orr
ecommendedv
itr
o
f
ert
il
iz
ati
on(
IVF)
.It
’snotani
deal
sol
uti
onbutatl
eastIt
houghtIcoul
dget
t
ocar
rymychi
l
dyouknowev
ent
hough
hewon’
tbeconcei
vednat
ural
l
y.Wel
lwe
deci
dedt
ogi
vei
tat
rywewer
eso
hopef
ulandmyhusbandwasv
ery
suppor
ti
ve.It
houghtf
inal
l
yIcoul
dgi
ve
hi
m anhei
r,Icoul
dhav
eachi
l
dofmy
ownbutt
heI
VFwasn’
tsuccessf
ul”
“
OhCabaI
’
m sor
ry”
“
Wewer
eshat
ter
edbutwedi
dn’
tgi
veup.
Wet
ri
edagai
nandagai
nbutwekept
get
ti
ngt
hesamer
esul
t.Thedoct
ort
old
ust
hati
t’
susual
l
ytakessi
xat
tempt
sfor
I
VFt
obesuccessf
ulbutIwast
ir
edof
hav
inghi
ghhopeandbedi
sappoi
nted
ov
erandov
er.Iwast
ir
edofseei
ngmy
husbandhur
ti
nganddi
sappoi
ntedev
ery
t
imewewer
etol
dIVFwasn’
tsuccessf
ul.
Iwast
ir
edofev
ery
thi
ngIf
eltl
i
kea
f
ail
ureofwoman,
afai
l
ureofawi
fe.I
f
eltl
i
keI
’
m al
essofawoman.
Ev
ery
thi
ngwasj
ustt
oomuchIsank
deepi
ntodepr
essi
on.Icoul
dn’
t
under
standIst
il
ldon’
tunder
standhow
canGoddenymeoneoft
hemost
i
mpor
tantt
hingawomancoul
ddowi
th
t
hei
rbody
.”Hert
ear
sst
ream downher
f
acemyhear
tsi
nks.Iputt
hepl
atei
nthe
si
nkandpul
lhert
omyar
ms.Idon’
t
knowwhatt
osayt
ohert
omakeherf
eel
bet
terIwi
shIcandosomet
hingf
orher
.
Shecal
msdownaf
terawhi
l
eandwi
pes
hert
ear
s
“
I’
m sor
ry….
”
“
Don’
tit
’sokayt
ocr
yIknowt
hatwe
j
ustmetbutI
’
m her
efory
ou”
“
Thanky
ousomuchi
t’
smeansal
ot
f
rom me”
“
Iwi
lcar
ryonwi
tht
hedi
shes…”
“
Stopi
tsi
sIwi
l
lbef
inemeet
ingMuuj
i
za
andKamar
iamademeacceptmy
si
tuat
ioni
t’
sjustt
hatt
het
houghtof
l
osi
ngt
hem t
ri
gger
edt
hepai
n”
“
Iunder
standsi
s”Wecont
inuewi
th
di
shesi
nsi
l
enceunt
ilIdeci
det
obr
eaki
t.
“
CanIt
ell
youwhatIt
hink”
“
Yes”
“
Ithi
nky
oushoul
dtr
ythi
sonel
astt
ime
may
bei
tmi
ghtbesuccessf
ul”
“
NonoIwon’
tNokubongaIdon’
twant
t
ogot
hrought
hatr
oadagai
nand
wast
ingmoney
”
“
ComeonCabay
ouonl
ytr
ied3t
imes
whi
chmeanst
her
e’sst
il
l3mor
ewho
knowsmay
bet
hisf
our
thchancei
tcoul
d
wor
k.”
“
Isai
dNo!
!!
”Isi
gh
“
I’
m sor
ryt
oshout
”
“
NoI
’
m sor
ryt
oint
erf
erei
tjustt
hatI
wanty
ousobadt
obehappyy
ou
deser
vei
t.
”
“
Whati
fitdoesn’
tbecomesuccessf
ul
aswel
l
”
“
Whati
fitdoesCaba?Whati
fthi
sfour
th
chancei
stheonl
ychancey
ouneed”
“
Idon’
tknowIr
eal
l
ydon’
tknow”
“
Justt
hinkabouti
t”shesi
ghsheav
il
y.I
wi
shsheagr
eesandgi
vei
tat
ry,
who
knowsmay
bei
tcoul
dwor
k.Abi
tlat
e
t
heysayt
hei
rgoodby
esandpr
omi
set
o
br
ingKamar
ia’
scl
othest
omor
row.Af
ter
t
heyl
eftwer
eti
ret
obed.

I
m wokenupbyt
inyf
inger
spoki
ngmy
nost
ri
lsandwetki
ssesal
lov
ermyf
ace.
“
Uhm mh!
”
“
WakeupMommy
!It
’smor
ning!
”She
scr
eamsgosht
hischi
l
dwhyi
sshe
scr
eami
ng!Thi
sisoneoft
her
easonI
don’
twantt
osl
eepwi
thKamar
ia.She’
s
anear
lybi
rdandwhenshe’
sawakeal
l
ofushav
etowakeupar
gh.
“
Muuj
i
za!Muj
i
za!Muj
i
za!
”Iheart
hebed
mov
ingandIknowt
hatshe’
sjumpi
ng
upanddown.
“
Kamar
iamaan!
”shegi
ggl
esandIhear
mom j
oini
ngher
.
“
Mom pl
easet
aket
hischi
l
dyer
rr”
“
Sekusi
l
est
handwasami
wakeup”ar
gh
“
Mor
ningdr
agongr
anny
”
“
Mor
ningsweet
hear
thowar
eyou”
“
I’
m notf
inedr
agongogoMuui
j
izawas
f
art
ingt
hewhol
eni
ghty
ooo.I
’
m
sl
eepi
ngwi
thy
out
oni
ght
”mom bur
st
i
ntol
aught
er
“
Youar
ely
ingwena!
”Isay
“
Iswear
!”Ar
ght
hischi
l
dshei
stheone
whowaspol
l
uti
ngt
heai
r,shef
art
sa
l
otwhensheat
ecooki
es.Dur
ingour
bondi
ngsessi
ony
est
erdaymom
coul
dn’
tst
opspoi
l
ingherwi
thgoodi
es
andshewenthar
doncooki
esbecause
shel
ovest
hem.
“
Mom It
oldy
out
onotgi
vehert
oo
muchcooki
esmywhol
ebedr
oom
smel
l
sKamar
ia’
sfar
t”mom l
aughsand
t
hel
i
ttl
eonej
oinsher
.
“
Comel
et’
sgomakebr
eakf
astbutf
ir
st
l
etst
artbywashi
ngy
ourf
aceand
br
ushi
ngt
eet
hcupcake”ohnowIcan
br
eat
he.Iheart
hem wal
ki
ngoutj
ustas
I
’
m aboutr
oll
outofbedmyphoner
ings.
“
Hel
l
o”
“
MissMt
himkhul
uhowar
eyou”Ican’
ta
smi
l
ethatbr
eaksacr
ossmyf
ace
“
I’
m wel
landy
our
sel
fMrNkosi
”
“
I’
m okay
.Howdoesi
tfeel
tohav
ethe
l
i
ttl
epr
incessback”
“
I’
m bey
ondhappy
”
“
I’
m al
sohappydoy
ouhav
epl
ans
t
oday
”
“
No”
“
Iwi
l
lli
ket
ospendt
hewhol
edaywi
th
y
ouandl
i
ttl
eonei
fit
’sokaywi
thy
ouof
cour
se”
“
Okay
”
“
Iwi
l
lcomepi
cky
ouupi
nanhour
”
“
Wewi
l
lbewai
ti
ng”
“
Seey
amyDol
l
face”
“
Shar
p”Ihangupandt
ryt
ocal
luncl
e
Soxbutst
il
lhe’
sunr
eachabl
e.Ihav
e
beencal
l
inghi
mfr
om y
est
erdayt
olet
hi
m knowt
hatmoonl
i
ghthasbeen
f
oundbutIcan’
treachhi
m.
“
Rocky
!”I
nasecondhe’
sli
cki
ngmyf
ace
andbar
king.I
t’
sbeenawhi
l
esi
ncehe
ex
erci
sed.I
’
m gl
admydaught
erhas
beenf
oundbecauseshe’
stheonewho
pl
ayswi
thhi
m.Gol
denr
etr
iev
ersar
e
bi
rdsathear
tssot
heyl
i
ket
opl
aya
gameoff
etchorswi
m.Theseex
erci
ses
makesRockyt
oadapteasyi
nanyt
ype
ofhome.Imakemywayt
othe
bat
hroom wi
thRocky
.He’
sadapt
ing
v
eryqui
ckl
yher
eandt
hegoodt
hingi
s
I
’
mfami
l
iarwi
thmyhomesoI
t’
seasyt
o
communi
cat
ewi
thhi
m.Muf
fi
nusedt
o
hel
pmef
indt
hingsbef
oreIgett
othem
butwi
thRockyi
t’
ssl
i
ght
lydi
ff
erent
becausehe’
stheonet
hatbecomesmy
ey
es.Hel
eadsmef
rom onedest
inat
ion
t
otheot
her
.I’
m sur
eyouaski
ngy
our
sel
f
howdoesheknowwher
edoIwantt
o
go?Hei
susedt
omyev
ery
dayr
out
ine
butwhenI
’
m goi
ngt
oapl
acehe’
s
doesntknowIdi
recthi
mfr
om one
dest
inat
iont
otheot
her
.It
akeal
ong
assbat
handonceI
’
m donewi
thmy
hy
gienepr
ocessIheadbackt
othe
bedr
oom andl
ooksomet
hingt
oweari
n
mycl
oset
.Dur
ingt
heweekmymom
unpackmyl
uggagesandpackmy
cl
othesni
cel
yinmycl
osetj
ustt
heway
sheuset
o.Ioptf
oramust
ardy
ell
ow
wr
apcr
opt
opandr
ippedbl
ackj
eanwi
th
br
ownsandal
s.Ij
ustl
etmyhai
rloseI
hav
enev
erdonemyhai
rbef
oreex
cept
r
elax
ingorcur
li
ngt
hem.Il
i
ket
okeepi
t
j
ustl
i
ket
hatIl
ovet
hef
eel
off
reshai
rin
myscal
p.Mom andGuguhav
etr
ied
count
lesst
imest
omakemedobr
aids
orwhat
everunt
ilt
heygav
eup.Speaki
ng
ofGugusi
gh!Ir
eal
l
ywi
shwecanmeet
sot
hatwecant
alk.If
eel
li
keshe’
s
angr
yatme,
whyi
sshenotcomi
ngt
o
seemeoranswer
ingmycal
l
satl
east
.
I
t’
sbeenaweekandf
ewday
ssi
nceI
camebackandasmybestf
ri
endshei
s
supposedt
obet
heonet
oseemebutI
under
stand.It
akemyphoneandmake
mywayt
otheki
tchen.I
t’
ssmel
l
ing
di
vi
nemyst
omachgr
umbl
es.
“
Mommy,
dragongr
annyandIar
e
maki
ngpancakes”
“
Mmm pl
easegi
vemeone”
“
Ha.
amommymusughal
a”wel
augh
“
Mor
ningGogo”
“
Mor
ningsweet
hear
tcomegi
vesgogoa
ki
ss”she’
spushi
ngi
tnowbutbecause
I
’
minagoodmoodat
hingi
mzame.I
ki
sshercheekandsi
tonahi
ghchai
r
nex
ttoher
.
“
MrMwangi
broughtKamar
ia’
scl
othes
herl
uggagei
sinmybedr
oom”
“
OhgoodbecauseKamar
iaandIar
e
goi
ngout
”
“
Wher
eto”mom asks
“
ToumhIdon’
tknowbutwear
egoi
ng
wi
thLwenkosi
”
“
Hai
boMi
rawhatf
or?Lwandl
ehasa
gi
rl
fr
iendy
oudoknowt
hatnj
e”
“
Iknowmom he’
sjustt
aki
ngusout
not
hingmor
e.”
“
Idon’
tIl
i
ket
hisMi
rawhydoeshewant
t
otakey
ouout
?Iaskedhi
mifhe’
ssur
e
aboutmov
ingonandhesai
dhe’
ssur
e
sowhati
sal
lthi
snow.
”Iswal
l
owhar
d
“
Hawuphel
awedon’
thav
etobe
enemi
esmamaespeci
all
ynowt
haty
ou
ar
edat
inguncl
eKsowegoi
ngt
obe
f
ami
l
yvel
e”
“
Mmm Mi
ray
out
hinky
ouar
esmar
t
huh?
”Goshwomandon’
tyout
hinkI
knowwhaty
ouar
esay
ing.Iknowokay
butI
’
mtr
yingt
opushi
tatt
hebackof
mymi
nd.
“
Iwasj
ustsay
ingmom”
“
Idon’
twanty
out
ogethur
tMi
raIt
hink
i
t’
sbesty
oust
ayawayf
rom Lwandl
eor
anyboyf
ort
hatmat
ter
”
“
Iknowmom butcanIatl
eastspend
t
odaywi
thhi
m onl
y,j
ustt
ogetcl
osur
e”
“
Okayt
odayonl
yMi
ranex
tti
meI
fIsee
y
ouwi
thhi
m Iwi
l
lki
l
lyoudoy
ouhear
me”Iswal
l
owhar
dandnodwi
thmy
head.Mom f
ini
shmaki
ngbr
eakf
astso
weeatatt
hedi
ningr
oom ov
erl
i
ght
chat
ter
“
Youst
il
lhav
en’
tbeenabl
etor
each
Sox
”mom asks
“
Yes”
“
Kant
iyi
nii
nki
ngay
alomf
anahewas
maki
ngnoi
seaboutkeepi
ngmy
daught
ert
hisandt
hatnowhecan’
tbe
r
eached”Gogosay
s.Nami
I’
m conf
used
what
’sgoi
ngon.Anhourl
atemom i
s
donewi
thbat
hingmydaught
erand
dr
essi
ngherj
ustt
henLwandl
ear
ri
ves.I
don’
tev
enwanthi
mtocomei
nsi
det
he
housebecauseIknowmom wi
l
lgr
il
lhi
m.
“
Bye!
”Isayt
othem andwemakeour
wayout
.
“
‘MyDol
l
face”Hesqueez
esmei
nhi
s
ar
msandIsi
nki
nhi
sar
ms.Ohhe
al
way
ssmel
l
ssogoodIhav
enot
iced
t
hathe’
snol
ongerski
nnynowbuthas
muscl
esandal
lwhi
chmakeshi
shugs
t
hebestev
enmor
e.
“
Cuddl
ecakes”Hepul
l
sbackandki
sses
myf
orehead
“
Whoi
sthi
sli
tt
leangel
overher
e”
“
Pumpki
nthi
sLwenkosi
myf
ri
endsayhi
t
ohi
m”
“
Hel
l
o”shesay
ssof
tl
yheeeunkabi
can
beshykant
i
“
Hel
l
oangel
facey
ouar
esobeaut
if
ul”
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Shel
ooksl
i
key
ouhey
”Ismi
l
e
“
Comel
et’
sgopl
aysomegamesand
hav
esomei
cecr
eam.Doy
oul
i
kei
ce
cr
eam”
“
Yesssandcooki
es!
”
“
Hay
inocooki
est
oday
”
“
‘Muuj
i
za”Shewhi
nes
“
Nol
et’
sleav
e”Isi
twi
thKamar
iaand
Rockyatt
hebackseatwhi
l
ehe’
sal
one
ont
hef
ront
.Thedr
ivei
sfi
l
ledwi
th
pumpki
nbl
abber
ingandLwenkosi
l
aughi
ngnonest
op
“
Damnsher
emi
ndsmeofSnoy
az”
“
Neh”Wegi
ggl
e
“
Theywi
l
lgetal
ongv
erywel
l
”hesay
s
andIagr
eewi
thhi
m.Thedayi
sspent
wel
latushakaki
dswor
ldandmy
daught
erenj
oysev
eryf
unact
ivi
ti
esunt
il
shecompl
ainsaboutbei
ngt
ir
edsowe
l
eav
eforLwenkosi
’
sfav
our
ir
e
r
est
aur
antwher
eweenj
oyourmeal
.
Af
tereat
inghebuy
sicecr
eam f
orus
t
henwedr
ivet
othepar
kandchi
l
lther
e.
Hehadbr
oughtapi
cni
cbl
anket
.Wi
thi
n
asecondKamar
iai
ssnor
ingsl
i
ght
ly
shamemybabymustbet
ir
ed.Some
gi
rl
scomef
orasel
fi
eIf
orgott
hathe’
s
nowacel
ebr
it
y.Ishoul
dwat
chi
sif
ungo
y
az.
“
I’
m sor
ryaboutt
hat
”
“
Comeony
ouar
eacel
ebr
it
ysoI
under
stand”honest
lyI
’
m soj
eal
ous
t
hesegi
rl
sdi
dn’
tev
enacknowl
edgeme
al
ltheywant
edi
ssel
fi
eswi
thhi
m but
heyI
’
m not
hingt
ohi
mtobegi
nwi
thwhy
woul
dtheyev
enacknowl
edgemeor
may
bet
heyknowhi
sgi
rl
fr
iend.
“
Heywaj
ulanj
engokwenqondowhi
l
e
I
’
m her
e”Hel
i
ftsmeupwi
thmychi
n.
“
I’
mjustt
hinki
ngaboutwhatmymom
sai
d”
“
Whatdi
dshesay
”It
ell
him
“
OhIunder
standbutt
ell
mewhatdoy
ou
wantwena”
“
Doesi
tmat
ter
”
“
Ofcour
se”
“
She’
sri
ghtLwenkosi
Iknowi
nmymi
nd
Ihav
etost
ayawayf
rom y
oubutmy
hear
tyear
nsev
erysi
ngl
emomentwi
th
y
ou”Iwhi
spert
hel
astpar
t
“
Ial
sowantt
obewi
thy
ouev
erysi
ngl
e
secondoft
hedaymyDol
l
face.
”
“
Buty
ouhav
eagi
rl
fr
iendLwenkosi
and
usspendi
ngt
imet
oget
heri
t’
snotr
ight
becausey
ouandIknowt
hatt
hisi
snot
mor
ethenj
ustspendi
ngt
imet
oget
her
.I
t
hinki
t’
sbet
terwedon’
tseeeachot
her
”
“
Thi
sisunf
airMi
raIhav
en’
tseeny
ou
f
ory
ear
snowIhav
etost
opseei
ngy
ou!
”
“
Youhav
eagi
rl
fr
ienddammi
t!Wehav
e
t
orespecther
!!
”
“
Yout
hinkIenj
oyt
hishuh?Yout
hinkI
wantt
hisaf
terpr
omi
singhert
hatIwi
l
l
nev
erhur
ther
?Yout
hinkIwantt
odo
t
hiswhenIknowhowmucht
hiswi
l
l
br
eakher
?NoIdon’
twantt
obutI
’
min
nocont
rol
Mir
a.I
’
minnocont
rol
ofmy
f
eel
i
ngst
owar
dsy
ou.Theynev
erdi
ed
andt
heywi
l
lnev
erdi
e!I
’
m hy
pnot
ized
byt
het
houghtofy
ourpr
esencei
nmy
l
i
fe.Youar
etheonl
ysongt
hatmyhear
t
cansi
ng.Youoccupyeachandev
ery
spacei
nmyhear
t.Myhear
tdoesn’
tbeat
wi
thouty
ou.Tel
lmewhatt
odoMi
ra
whatshoul
dIdo”Thel
astpar
tcomes
outaswhi
sper
“
Idon’
tknowLwenkosi
Ireal
l
ydon’
t
know.Ihav
eal
way
sknewt
hatI
’
m not
ov
ery
ouhenceInev
erev
ent
ri
edt
o
mov
eon.Iknewt
hatIwoul
dn’
tcommi
t
my
sel
ftosomeoneel
sewhenIhav
eyou
i
mpr
int
edi
nmysoul
.”
“
Inot
herwor
dsy
ouar
esay
ingIwas
wr
ongf
ormov
ingon?
”Ishr
ug
“
Inev
erwant
edmov
eonf
rom y
oubutI
hadt
ofort
hesakeofmysani
ty,
fort
he
sakeofmyl
i
fe,
fort
hesakeofmyf
ami
l
y.
Youdi
sappear
edonmeandl
eftme
shat
ter
edandmi
ser
abl
e.Youknowt
he
har
destpar
tist
hatI
’
mtheonet
obl
ame.
I
’
mtheonewhobr
oughtal
lthi
spai
nand
suf
fer
ing.I
’
mtheonet
obebl
amedf
or
y
ourdi
sappear
ance”Hi
svoi
cei
s
br
eaki
ng.Ipul
lhi
m cl
oset
omeandhe
pr
esseshi
sfor
eheadagai
nstmi
ne.We
st
ayi
nthatposi
ti
oni
nsi
l
encet
heonl
y
soundwecanheari
sthebeat
ingofour
hear
ts.
“
Ilov
eyousomuch”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Ial
l
owmyt
ear
stof
all
.
Hewi
pest
hem wi
thhi
sthumbsand
capt
uresmyl
i
psi
ntohi
s,weki
sssl
owl
y
andeepl
ypour
ingourhear
tsouti
nthe
ki
ss.
-

I
t’
sbeenaweeksi
nceIcamebackSox
t
oldmet
hatMi
ra’
sadopt
ivemom t
ook
of
fwi
tht
hei
rdaught
erbuthedoesnot
bel
i
evet
hatbecausemom Bongasai
d
hewantt
okeephi
m awayf
rom hi
s
daught
er.Hehasn’
tmethi
sdaught
er
butal
readyhei
sat
tached.Thi
sist
aki
ng
ahuget
oll
onhi
m andsomehow
af
fect
ingourr
elat
ionshi
pbecausehe’
s
har
dlyev
erar
ound.I
’
m al
way
sal
one
cr
yingandIhav
en’
tbeenatv
arsi
tyf
ora
weekIf
eel
drai
ned.Imadean
appoi
ntmentwi
thourdoct
orat11am.I
onl
ygotanhourt
oleav
e.I
’
m on
cont
racept
ivebutIwantt
omakesur
e
t
hatI
’
m notpr
egnant
.Ihav
ehear
dal
ot
ofst
ori
esaboutwomanwhof
all
pr
egnantwhi
l
etheyar
eoncont
racept
ive.
Yesweusedpr
otect
ionbutt
hese
r
ubber
sbr
eaksr
ight
.Thel
astt
hingI
wanti
stohav
eababyofast
ranger
.I’
m
hav
ingbr
eakf
astwhi
l
egoi
ngt
hroughmy
phonewhenSoxmakeshi
sway
downst
air
s.Hecamebackdr
unkl
ate
ni
ght
.
“
Mor
ningsweet
hear
t”Heki
ssest
he
backofmyneck
“
Mor
ningst
handwasami
”Thi
smani
s
ev
ery
thi
ngt
ome,
he’
sal
lIgott
he
t
houghtofl
i
vingwi
thouthi
mis
unbear
abl
e.
“
You’
rebr
eakf
asti
sint
hewar
mer
”
“
Thanky
oubabyIdon’
tknowwhatI
woul
ddowi
thouty
ou”
“
Remembert
hatal
way
s”Het
akeshi
s
br
eakf
astandsi
tsdown
“
Whenwi
l
lyougot
oseeMi
rashe’
syour
f
ri
endGugu”
“
I’
m notr
eadyt
ofaceher
”
“
Oratl
eastanswerhercal
l
s”
“
Shet
oldy
ouI
’
m notanswer
inghercal
l
s
,
Isee”
“
Shemi
ssedy
ou”
“
Soxpl
easeI
’
m st
il
ltr
yingt
ogetuset
o
t
hef
actt
haty
ouhav
eadaught
erwi
th
herj
ustl
etmebe.Iwi
l
lgoseeherwhen
I
’
mready
!”
“
I’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
tmeantt
oputpr
essur
e
ony
ouandIwantt
othanky
ouonce
agai
nforcomi
ngbackhome.Il
ovey
ou
MaNcube”Ismi
l
e
“
Ilov
eyout
ooDl
ami
ni”myphonepi
ngs
i
t’
saTwi
tt
ernot
if
icat
ion.Iopeni
tand
wowi
t’
sapi
ctur
eofLwandl
e,Mi
raand
l
i
ttl
erepl
i
caofMi
raatushakaki
dswor
ld.
‘
Lwandl
elwenkosi
Nkosi
whopl
ays
Manqobai
nIsi
fungowi
thhi
spr
odi
gal
gi
rl
fr
iendt
hatoncewonabi
gsi
ngi
ng
compet
it
ion4y
ear
sago.Don’
ttheyl
ook
cut
etoget
herwi
tht
hei
rli
tt
leone’
“
Wow”
“
Whati
sit
?”Ipasshi
m myphone
“
Whatt
hef
ucki
sthi
s!”Hebangst
he
t
abl
eIj
umpabi
twi
thf
ri
ght
“
It
’sMi
ra…”
“
Ofcour
seIseewhoi
sit
!HeeeMi
rai
s
gal
l
ivant
ingwi
thmydaught
erwi
tht
hat
pr
ickwhi
l
eIt
hef
atherhav
en’
tseenmy
daught
er!
”Heget
sup
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”Hedoesn’
ttel
l
mebutwal
ksaway
.Isi
ghandgetup
t
henputmypl
atei
nthesi
nk.Iheadup
t
otakehi
sot
hercarkey
s.I
’
m dr
ivi
ngt
o
t
hedoct
orwi
tht
ear
sbl
i
ndi
ngmysi
ght
.
DrMkhwanaz
ilet
’smei
n,she’
sver
y
f
ri
endl
y
“
Guguhel
l
o”shesmi
l
eswi
del
y
“
Hel
l
oDoct
or”
“
Howar
eyousi
s”It
ryt
orepl
ybutal
oud
sobescapemyl
i
ps
“
Ohpoort
hingcomeher
e”Wesi
tont
he
smal
lbedandshecomf
ort
sme.
“
What
’sgoi
ngont
alkt
ome.I
s
Mpendul
ogi
vi
ngy
oupr
obl
ems”
“
Notr
eal
l
y”
“
Thenwhati
tis?
“
Ifeel
li
keI
’
m goi
ngl
osehi
mtomybest
f
ri
end.Hesay
shel
ovesmebutIcan
seet
hathest
il
ll
ovesmybestf
ri
end”
“
Slowdownandt
akeadeepbr
eat
he
t
hent
ell
me”Idoasshesay
sand
nar
rat
eev
ery
thi
ng.
“
OhI
’
m sor
ryGugubutdoy
ouknowt
hat
ev
ery
thi
nghappensf
orar
easonandI
t
hinky
oucomi
ngher
egotar
easont
oo.
Wor
rynotmychi
l
dokay
”Ist
hisherway
ofconsol
i
ngmei
fsoayshe’
sshoul
d
hav
eshuthermout
hnj
e!

Tear
sar
efal
l
ingonmyphonescr
eenas
Il
ookatt
hei
rpi
ctur
eandr
eadi
ngt
weet
s.
‘
Wowt
hegi
rlwaspr
egnantwhenshe
di
sappear
ed’
*
‘
I
sn’
tshebl
i
ndhowdi
dshet
akecar
eof
t
hebaby
?’
*
‘
HahahaIbetshewant
edt
hedi
ckas
bl
i
ndasshei
s’
*
‘
Iwonderi
fshewi
l
lcont
inuet
osi
ngI
woul
dbehappyi
fshecont
inues.Il
ove
hershe’
sagr
eatsi
nger
’
*
‘
Theyar
esocut
etoget
her
’
*
‘
Ifeel
sor
ryf
orhi
snewgi
rl
fr
iendshame’
*
‘
Ababydoesn’
tkeepamansheshoul
d
st
ayawayf
rom Manqobahehas
someonenow’
*
‘
I
fIcangetoneni
ghtwi
thhi
m Iswear
hewi
l
lfor
getabouthi
sbl
i
ndgi
rl
t
oget
herwi
thhi
snewgi
rl
fr
iend!
’
*
‘
Howcanshedi
sappearf
ory
ear
sand
keephi
sdaught
erawayf
rom hi
m she’
s
cr
uel
!’
’
*
‘
Il
ovet
hem shame.#Mi
racl
eSea4r
ever
’

It
hrowmyphoneont
hewal
landwai
l
l
i
keababy
.Howcoul
dLwandl
edot
his
t
ome.Sot
heyhav
eadaught
ert
oget
her
?
Whyhedi
dn’
ttel
lme?
CHAPTER46

Iwi
sht
imest
andst
il
lwhenev
erI
’
m wi
th
myDol
l
facei
t’
ski
l
lsmet
hatt
hisi
sthe
l
astwespendt
imet
oget
her
.I’
m not
pr
epar
edt
oloseheragai
nIcan’
t,t
hen
ont
heot
hersi
det
her
e’sAy
anda.How
doIt
ell
hert
hatI
’
m st
il
li
nlov
ewi
thMi
ra
wi
thoutbr
eaki
ngherhear
t?I
mpossi
bleI
knowandIhat
etobet
heonet
obr
eak
herhear
twhenIpr
omi
sedt
opr
otecther
hear
tnomat
terwhat
.ThepastweekI
spental
oneaf
terf
indi
ngoutt
hatMi
ra
hasadaught
erwi
thSoxmademecome
t
oar
eal
i
zat
iont
hatnot
hingwi
l
lchange
howIf
eel
formydol
l
faceandnotev
en
l
ovei
tsel
fcandescr
ibehowIf
eel
forher
.
Knowi
ngt
odayi
t’
sourl
astdayspent
t
oget
heri
sfor
cingmet
omakea
deci
sionIhav
ebeenr
unni
ngawayf
rom.
I
’
m acowar
dknowbutIdon’
tenj
oy
hur
ti
ngpeopl
eit
’snoteasyt
obr
eak
someone’
shear
tfornogoodr
eason.I
t’
s
noteasyt
oseesomeonebr
eaki
ngapar
t
becauseofy
ou.Wehav
ebeensi
tt
ingi
n
mycarf
orabouta30mi
nut
es.Thel
i
ttl
e
pr
incessi
ssl
eepi
ngont
hebackoht
hat
oneshe’
ssocut
e.I
’
m soi
nlov
ewi
thher
.
“
Ihav
etogonowIdon’
twantmom t
o
gocr
azyony
ou”
“
NehIwi
l
lcal
lyou”
“
Hay
iLwenkosi
siv
umel
emenj
enomor
e
cont
act
”
“
I’
m notst
ayi
ngawayf
rom y
ouMi
ray
ou
wi
l
lseeaboutt
hat
”
“
Stopmaki
ngt
hingshar
dpl
ease”
“
Doy
ouwantt
ost
ayawayf
rom me”
“
Don’
tbel
i
ket
hatl
et’
sacceptt
hingst
he
wayt
heyar
e”
“
It
’ssounf
airMi
rat
hatwehadt
o
separ
atewhenwest
il
ll
oveeachot
her
”
“
Suchi
sli
fewewi
l
lbest
rong”
“
Youar
egi
vi
nguponourl
oveMi
raj
ust
l
i
ket
hat
?”
“
Whatt
her
etohol
dont
o?Youhav
ea
gi
rl
fr
iendLwenkosi
.Ther
e’ssomeone
y
oul
ove,
someonewhoy
oumakel
ove
t
o,someoney
ouki
ss,
someonewhoy
ou
pr
omi
sedt
otakecar
eof
,someoney
ou
i
ntr
oducedt
oyourf
ami
l
ywhi
chshows
shemeanssomucht
oyou,
someone
whoy
oubel
ongt
ori
ghtnowandt
hat
per
soni
snotme.Idon’
thav
etof
ightf
or
y
out
obei
nmyl
i
feLwenkosi
ify
ouwer
e
meantt
obemi
ney
ouwi
l
lbemi
ner
ight
now”Herwor
dsar
ecut
ti
ngdeep
“
Youar
eri
ghtt
hatsomeonei
snoty
ou
andshewi
l
lnev
erbey
oubecause
t
her
e’sonl
yoneMi
rawhoownsmy
soul
”
“
Sokahl
ekahl
ewhatar
eyousay
ing
Lwenkosi
youwantmet
ocome
bet
weent
het
woofy
ou”
“
I….
”someonebangst
hewi
ndow.Il
ook
upar
git
’st
hatbast
ard.
“
Mir
agetoutoft
hecar
!!
”Hescr
eams
webot
hgetoutoft
hecar
.
“
Whatt
hef
ucki
syourpr
obl
em dude!
”
“
YeMi
rahowdar
eyoual
l
owt
hispr
ick
seemydaught
erbef
oreIev
enseeher
!
I
’
mthef
athernothi
m!”
“
Heywenahowmanyt
imesdoIhav
eto
t
ell
yout
ost
opt
alki
ngt
omyDol
l
face
l
i
ket
hat
!She’
snoty
ourchi
l
dyi
ni
ngawe!
!”
“
ShutupI
m nott
alki
ngt
oyouasshol
e!”
“
Wel
lI’
mtal
ki
ngt
oyoushl
ama!
”
“
Ngi
zokukhahl
elaLwandl
ejustbecause
y
ouhav
emuscl
esnowy
out
hinkI
’
m
scar
edofy
ou?Ngi
zokubul
alaboy
ngi
mdal
akunawe!
”
“
Thenst
artact
ingol
dMal
umeSox
!
ar
gh.
”Sheopenst
hedoorandwakesup
Kamar
ia
“
Noi
t’
sfi
neIwi
l
lcar
ryher
”Isay
“
Car
ryherukunuka!
!Getaway
”He
pushesmeandt
akeanal
readyawake
Kamar
ia.
“
IguessIwi
l
lseey
ouar
ound”Mi
rasay
s
Ismi
l
efai
ntl
yandwat
cht
hem wal
k
away
.Ican’
thel
pashar
ppai
nof
j
eal
ousy
.Igeti
nmycaranddr
ivehome.
I
’
m wel
comedbyaphonet
hrownr
ightat
mel
uckyIcat
chi
t
“
Whatt
hef
ucki
sthi
s!”Il
ookathi
s
phoneandseeapi
ctur
eofmyDol
l
face,
my
sel
fandangel
face.
“
Ihav
enoi
deawhot
ookt
hepi
ctur
eit
’s
notme”
“
Didn’
tIt
ell
yout
ost
ayawayf
rom Mi
ra
huh!
!”
“
AndIt
oldy
ouIwon’
tmal
umesoget
usedt
oit
!”
“
Heey
azwenay
out
hinky
ouar
eaman
nowhuh?Yout
hinky
oucant
alkt
ome
l
i
keI
’
myourf
ri
end!Howdar
eyouspend
t
imewi
thMi
raknowi
ngy
ouar
eapubl
i
c
f
igur
e!Hav
eseeny
ouseent
het
weet
s!
Mi
radoesn’
tneedt
hismaaan!She’
s
deal
i
ngwi
thal
ot!
”
“
Manj
emi
naImustnotl
i
vemyl
i
fehay
i!
whoev
ert
ookt
hispi
ctur
eyoumustf
ind
hi
m orherIwantt
osuehi
mfori
nvadi
ng
myspace!Angi
thi
youar
eahacker
”He
chuckl
esandshakeshi
sheadbef
ore
char
gingf
ormeIdon’
tknowwhendi
d
dadmakehi
swayi
nbuthest
opshi
m.
“
Sbal
ical
m down!
”
“
Dontt
ell
met
ocal
m downt
hisboyi
s
f
ucki
ngr
ude!Het
alkt
omel
i
keI
’
m hi
s
f
ri
end!St
ayawayf
rom Mi
ra!
”
“
Iwon’
tst
ayawayIl
ovehert
hisi
sal
l
y
ourf
aul
t!Yousepar
atedmewi
tht
he
l
oveofmyl
i
fe!I
fMi
radi
dn’
tdi
sappear
wewoul
dbest
il
ltoget
her
!!Ihat
eyou
y
ouf
ort
hisnowI
’
m caughtupbet
ween
t
wogi
rl
sandIdon’
twanthur
ttot
hem.
Akungi
chaz
iukuphul
aabany
eabant
u
i
zi
nhl
i
ziy
o!”
“
Udaki
wey
ouwer
enev
ergoi
ngt
omeet
“
yourl
oveofy
ourl
i
fe”f
rom t
hef
ir
st
pl
acemor
on…”Icuthi
m of
f
“
Ify
oudi
dn’
ttur
nagai
nstKhany
inoneof
t
hiswoul
dhav
ehappened.Whydi
dn’
t
y
oust
ickt
othepl
an?I
t’
sbecauseofy
ou
shet
urnedagai
nstus!I
t’
sbecauseof
y
oumydol
l
facedi
sappear
edonme.I
woul
dnthav
etoconv
incemy
sel
fthatI
shoul
dmov
eonf
rom herandf
ind
someoneel
se.Iwoul
dbeher
ewi
thher
may
beKamar
iawoul
dbeev
enmi
ne!
”
“
Iwasn’
tgoi
ngt
owat
chBonga…”Icut
hi
m onceagai
n
“
Exact
lyy
ouwentagai
nstKhany
i
becauseofmom Bonga!Youwer
e
t
hinki
ngwi
thy
ourdi
ckandf
orgotabout
t
hedangert
hatmi
ghtoccur
!”He
chuckl
esandshakeshi
sheadi
n
di
sbel
i
ef.He’
sangr
ysoam I
.Usi
l
e
mal
umesoy
enahecanmakemi
stakes
becauseoft
hel
ovehehasf
ormom
BongabutIcan’
t.Hadhest
ickt
othe
pl
annoneoft
hiswoul
dhav
ehappened.
“
Onel
astt
imest
ayawayf
rom Mi
ra!
!”He
wal
ksoutf
umi
ngwi
thanger
.
“
Hay
ikodwanaweLwandl
eyousai
dyou
ar
esur
eaboutmov
ingonandt
hatwas
nowayt
otal
ktoy
ouruncl
eli
ket
hat
.He
deser
vesr
espect
!”Dadsay
s
Icl
i
ckmyt
oungeandwal
kout
.I’
m
dr
ivi
ngt
oAy
anda’
sapar
tment
.I’
m sur
e
shehasseent
hepi
ctur
e.Ineedt
o
ex
plai
nthatKamar
iai
snotmydaught
er
andbehonestaboutmyf
eel
i
ngs
t
owar
dsherandMi
ra.Iknockandknock
butshe’
snotat
tendi
ngme.Ihav
ea
spar
ekeysoIf
etchi
tinmycarand
opent
hedoor
.
“
Yay
a!”Iscr
eam asIsear
chf
orherbutI
can’
tfi
ndherIseeanot
eont
hecof
fee
t
abl
e.
“
I’
mti
redofy
ourl
i
es!I
’
m donewi
thy
ou!
”

-
I
’
mfumi
ngwi
thangerandhur
ti
ngatt
he
samet
imehowcoul
dMi
radot
his.I
’
m
t
hef
atherofKamar
iaIshoul
dbet
he
onet
oseeherf
ir
stbef
oreany
oneel
se
especi
all
ybef
oret
hatpr
ickLwandl
e.I
don’
twanthi
m nearmydaught
er.Isee
hi
scarpar
kingbef
oret
hegat
eandIl
ost
i
tasusual
hewantt
opl
ayMrt
oughguy
.
Thi
sboyt
hinksj
ustbecausehe
wor
kout
snowhecandosomet
hingt
o
me.I
’
m notscar
edofhi
m.ThemomentI
t
akemydaught
eri
nmyar
msIf
eel
thi
s
connect
ion.Yesshel
ooksal
otl
i
keher
mom butIhav
enodoubtt
hatshe’
s
mi
ne.Theconnect
ioni
sindescr
ibabl
e.
Wewal
kinsi
det
hehouseasMi
ra
ex
plai
ntomet
hathecal
l
edmebutshe
coul
dn’
treachme
“
I’
m sor
ryt
olashoutl
i
ket
hatIt
hinkI
l
ostmyphoneormi
spl
acedi
tyest
erday
atmyf
ri
end’
sbr
aai
.”
“
Ireal
l
ydon’
tli
kehowy
out
alkt
ome
mal
umeSox
.Fi
rsty
out
houghtI
’
m
keepi
ngherwayf
rom y
ounowt
his”
“
Yourmom sai
dshewi
l
lkeepheraway
f
rom mey
ouhav
etounder
standwher
e
I
’
m comi
ngf
rom
I
’
m sor
ryIacknowl
edgemymi
stake.
Seei
ngt
hatpr
ickspendi
ngt
imewi
thmy
daught
erwhi
l
eIhav
en’
tmethermade
mel
osti
t”shechuckl
es
“
Idon’
tunder
standwhyy
ouar
e
l
ogger
headswi
thLwenkosi
ngobaphel
a
wuweowedl
elay
enanott
heot
herway
ar
ound”
“
Ihat
ewhathedi
dtoy
ou.Ihat
ehi
mfor
y
ou”
“
Asi
fyouar
eper
fect
”Icl
enchmyj
aws.
Wef
indhergr
andmot
heri
nli
vi
ngr
oom.
“
Sawbonagogo”Isi
tdownandpul
l
Kamar
iaonmyl
ap
“
Yebomf
anaunj
ani
”
“
I’
m goodandy
our
sel
f”
“
I’
m goodt
oowehav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
oget
hol
dofy
ousi
ncey
est
erday
”
“
Mir
atol
dmeI
’
m sor
rygogoIl
ostmy
phonei
nabr
aai
yest
erday
”
“
OhokayIhopey
ouar
ehappyt
hatshe’
s
her
e.”
“
Ver
yhappy
..
.hel
l
onana”
“
Hi”shey
awnsIcanseet
hatshe’
sst
il
l
sl
eepy
.
“
Mygr
anddaught
ert
ell
smey
oudoubt
t
hatshe’
syour
s”Il
ookatMi
ra
“
Thet
hingi
sIoncer
aisedachi
l
dthat
wasnev
ermi
nesoIwant
edt
obesur
e”
“
Arey
ousat
isf
iedbyseei
ngherory
ou
wantDNA”
“
I’
m sat
isf
iedgogo”
“
Wel
lgoodsot
hedamages”
“
Iwi
l
lbeoni
tsoongogo.
”
“
Kuhl
ekemf
anawami
”
“
CanIgowi
thhert
oint
roducehert
omy
mot
her
”
“
She’
snotuset
oyoumal
umeSox
uz
okhal
a”Mi
rasay
s
“
Pleasecomewi
thus”Shehuf
fs
“
Please”
“
Okayf
ine.
..
Kamar
ia”
“
Mommy
”
“
Thi
sisy
ourDaddy
”
“
Mydaddy
”
“
Yessweet
hear
tsayhi
tohi
m”Kamar
ia
l
ooksatme
“
Arey
oumydaddy
?”
“
Yesbabygi
rl
”
“
Whyy
ounev
ercamet
oseeme?
”Oh
GodhowdoIanswert
hat
.
“
Uhm Daddyuset
oowedanger
ous
peopl
emoneyandt
heywant
edt
ohur
t
y
ouandmommybecauset
heywant
ed
mor
emoneysoIhadt
okeepmy
di
stancef
rom t
hebot
hofy
ouunt
ilt
he
pol
i
cear
rest
edt
hem”
“
Haaat
heywon’
thur
tusany
mor
e”
“
Nomypr
incessy
ouar
esaf
enowt
hey
ar
einj
ail
doy
ouf
orgi
veme”
“
Ifor
giv
eyoubuti
fyoubuymecooki
es”
“
Ofcour
semypr
incess”
“
Nocooki
esKamar
ia”Mi
rasay
s
“
Mommydoesn’
twantmet
oeat
cooki
esshesay
stheyIf
artal
otwhenI
eatt
hem butshe’
stheonewhof
arta
l
ot”Kamar
iawhi
sper
sinmyearIcan’
t
hel
pbutl
augh
“
Okayshewon’
thav
etoknowhert
heni
t
wi
l
lbeourl
i
ttl
esecr
et.
”
“
Pinkypr
omi
se”sheshowsmeher
pi
nki
e
“
pinki
epr
omi
se”Ii
nter
twi
nemypi
nki
e
wi
thher
sandshesmi
l
eswi
del
y.Iswear
Ihav
enev
erseensuchanbeaut
if
ul
angel
.Isaygoodby
etot
hegr
annyand
wel
eav
e.Themomentwear
ri
vemy
mom smi
l
eswi
del
y.
“
Mamameett
hemot
herofdaught
erMi
r
andKamar
iamydaught
er”
“
Hel
l
oMi
ra”
“
Hel
l
oMamahowar
eyou”
“
I’
mfi
nesi
sunj
ani
wena”
“
I’
mfi
ne”
“
HawkodwaMpendul
oyounev
ert
old
meshe’
syoung”
“
Mapl
easedon’
tst
art
”
“
Sawbonamunt
unz
aI’
myourgogo,
y
ourf
ather
’smommy
”
“
Hel
l
ogogo”Mom smi
l
esandweset
tl
e
ont
hecouch
“
Fuseg!Ourowaphi
lomgodoy
i!
”
“
It
’sagui
dedogmama”
“
Gui
dewhat
?”Lor
dthi
swomani
s
embar
rassi
ngme
“
Mir
acan’
tseet
hisdoghel
pshert
o
gui
deher
”
“
Ohshameakumuhl
emaanandIt
hinkI
l
i
kehert
henGugu
“
Ma”
“
Uli
vi
lauguguandangi
mzwi
sisnj
e
kahl
e”
“
Ther
e’snot
hingwr
ongwi
thGugu”Mi
ra
say
sannoy
ed
“
Ohy
ouknowher
?”
“
She’
smybestf
ri
end”
“
HeeeMpendul
oul
alaabangani
kant
i!
Uy
afananoy
ihl
orhaaa!
”
“
Don’
tyoudar
ecompar
emewi
th
asshol
e!”Igetup
“
Let
’sgoMi
ranx
!”Idon’
tgetmymom
howcanshehumi
l
iat
emei
nfr
ontoft
he
mot
herofmydaught
erandmydaught
er.
SheknowshowmuchIhat
eitwheshe
say
sthat
.
“
I’
m sor
ryaboutt
hat
”Isayt
oheraswe
dr
iveof
f
“
it
’sokaymal
umeSox
”
“
Youshoul
dst
opcal
l
ingmemal
ume
nowwehav
eachi
l
dtoget
heri
t’
ssounds
sowr
ong”Shegi
ggl
es
“
Canwespendsomet
imei
nthepar
k
t
henIwi
l
ldr
ivey
ouhome.
“
Okay
”Ipul
lof
fint
hepar
kandwechi
l
l
t
her
e.Kamar
iai
sabal
lofener
gyshame.
Il
ovehersomuch
“
Thanky
ousomuchf
ort
hisbeaut
if
ul
gi
ftIpr
omi
set
obet
her
eal
way
sther
e
f
ory
ouwheny
ouguy
sneedme”
“
Thanky
oumal
u..
.ImeanMpendul
o”I
pul
lthem i
nmyar
msbef
oreki
ssi
ng
t
hei
rfor
eheads.Onceuponat
imet
his
wasmydr
eam.

Il
ookatmyphonef
ort
hehundr
edt
ime
andhuf
f.It
hinkt
her
e’snet
wor
k
pr
obl
emsorsomet
hing.I
t’
ssounl
i
keK
t
onotcal
lmef
oral
mostt
hewhol
eday
.
Hei
stheonet
hatgotmeusedt
ohi
s4
t
imesadaycal
l
sandi
tdoesn’
thel
pthat
l
astni
ghthedi
dn’
tcal
lme.
“
Youhav
ebeenchecki
ngy
ourphone
andhuf
fi
ngsi
ncey
ougother
eBonga
ar
ewebor
ingy
ou”Ican’
tmi
sst
he
annoy
ancei
nherv
oice
“
I’
m sor
ryl
adi
es”I
’
m hav
ingl
unchwi
th
ZoandCaba.Il
i
ket
hatt
heygetal
ong
v
erywel
landIt
hinkwear
egoi
ngt
o
hav
eabeaut
if
ulr
elat
ionshi
ptoget
her
.
“
Whati
sitar
eyouex
pect
ingacal
l
?”
Cabaasks
“
No”Il
i
eandsi
ponmydr
ink
“
Outwi
thi
tal
readybecauseIwon’
tst
op
aski
ngy
ouunt
ily
out
ell
us”Zosay
s.She
canbeanagwhenshewantt
o.
“
So”Theybot
hlookatme.
“
Yourbr
otherhasn’
tcal
lmet
heday
whol
edayi
t’
ssounl
i
kehi
m and
y
est
erdayher
ecei
vedacal
lthatmade
hi
m angr
ysoIr
eal
l
ydon’
tknowwhatt
o
t
hinkr
ightnow”Zochuckl
es
“
YazIhav
ebeenwai
ti
ngf
ory
out
otel
l
mewhat
’sgoi
ngonbet
weeny
ouand
Khuz
ani
”
“
Wear
efr
iends”Zol
aughs
“
Fri
endst
hatki
sshowni
ce”Shesmi
rks
“
Okayf
ineIt
hinkIl
ovehi
m andIhav
e
deci
dedt
ogi
veusachancebutI
’
m
scar
edZo.Pl
easedon’
tgetmewr
ong
I
’
m notsay
ingy
ourbr
otheri
sabusi
ve
butIcan’
thel
pbutf
eel
scar
ed.Khumal
o
wasni
ceandgent
lel
i
keKhuz
ani
atf
ir
st
y
ear
slat
erhechanged.Idon’
twantt
o
got
hrought
hatt
raumaagai
n”
“
OhBonga”Zosqueez
esmyhandwhi
l
e
Cabagi
vesmeapi
tyl
ook.
“
I’
m notsay
ingt
hisj
ustbecausehe’
smy
br
otherbutKhuz
ani
ist
hemostsweet
andgent
lemanIhav
eev
erknown.He’
s
l
i
keourl
atef
ather
,socal
m andgent
le
somet
imesi
t’
sev
enhar
dtot
ell
when
he’
sangr
y.I
t’
stakessomeonewho
knowshi
mtonot
icei
fhe’
sangr
yorsad.
He’
sal
way
sincont
rol
ofhi
semot
ions.
Hel
ovesy
ouBongaIhav
eseent
heway
hel
ooksaty
ouandbehav
esar
oundy
ou.
Ihav
enot
icedhowhet
ri
est
ohi
dehi
s
f
eel
i
ngsf
ory
oubuthe’
sfai
l
ing.I
t’
s
act
ual
l
ymyf
ir
stt
imeseei
nghi
m wi
th
l
i
ket
hiswi
thanot
herwomanev
ersi
nce
Br
endadi
ed”
“
BrendaZuma?
”AsksCaba
“
Yeaht
heoneandonl
ygoddi
gger
”Zo
r
epl
i
es
“
Idi
dn’
tknowt
her
e’shi
stor
ybet
ween
Khuz
ani
andBr
enda.Shewasmyf
ri
end
bef
oreshe“
disappear
ed”ofcour
se”
wowI
’
m st
unned
“
Real
l
y?”
“
Yes”
“
Wel
ltheydohav
eahi
stor
yandt
hey
ev
enhav
eadaught
ert
oget
her
”
“
WowInev
erknewaboutadaught
er
shenev
ert
oldmeany
thi
ngabouta
daught
er”
”
Argt
hatbi
tchwasunt
rust
wor
thyas
deadasshei
sIst
il
ldon’
tli
keherf
or
hur
ti
ngmybr
otherbutI
’
m gl
adnowt
hat
he’
sfi
nal
l
ymov
ingon”
“
It
sasmal
lwor
ldhey
”Isay
“
Yeahi
tis”Theybot
hchor
us
“
Giv
eyourr
elat
ionshi
pachanceand
st
opbei
ngscar
edandov
ert
hinki
ng
t
hings.He’
snotper
fecthe’
shuman
af
teral
lbutIknowt
hathewi
l
lnev
er
mi
str
eaty
ouanyki
ndofway
”
“
Iwi
l
ltr
yandnotov
ert
hinkt
hingsand
j
ustgowi
thaf
low”
“
Yesmybabybr
otherdeser
vesa
womanl
i
key
oubaki
thi
it’
sti
mehe
set
tl
esdown”
“
Hai
bodon’
tcal
lhi
m ababymudal
a
kabi
lomunt
u”Wel
augh
“
He’
s2y
ear
syoungert
henmesot
hat
makeshi
m ababy
”
“
OhmyGodt
hat
’smeanI
’
m 3ol
der
t
henhi
m!”Ipopmyey
esout
“
Doesi
tmat
terwho’
sol
derandwho’
s
y
oungerasl
ongasy
oul
oveeachot
her
”
Cabasay
sbef
oret
aki
ngabi
teofher
st
eak
“
Yeswhatdot
heseki
dssaywhent
hey
wantabomkhul
ubae.
..
erm uhagei
s
j
ustanumber
!”Zoadds
“
Inev
ert
houghtIwi
l
lbei
nar
elat
ionshi
p
wi
thsomeoney
oungert
hanmewi
th3
y
ear
spho”
“
Wel
lhe’
swhaty
ouneedaf
ter4y
ear
sof
dr
oughtnotanol
dmanwhowi
l
lbe
snor
ingbef
oreheev
enr
eacht
heG-
spot
”Wel
augh
“
PlusKhuz
ani
looksl
i
kehewor
kout
s
sur
elyhe’
sheal
thyandgotener
gy”Caba
adds
“
Sowhenar
ewescr
atchi
ngt
hei
tch?
”
Zoaskswi
thanaught
ysmi
l
e
“
Goshy
out
wost
opi
t!
”Theybur
sti
nto
l
aught
ermx
mtheset
woi
diot
s!The
t
opi
cshi
ft
sfr
om meandIcoul
dn’
t
happi
erIdi
dn’
treal
i
zehowbadl
ydoI
needt
obesex
ifi
ed.Wet
alkabout
al
mostev
ery
thi
ngandany
thi
ng.I
ex
cusemy
sel
fwhenIf
eel
theur
get
o
peeandwal
ktot
hel
adi
eswher
eIdomy
busi
ness.JustasI
’
m aboutt
ogetouthe
pusheshi
swayi
n.
“
Hai
boKhu…”Hesmasheshi
sli
pson
meandIcan’
thel
pbutr
espondt
othe
heat
edki
ss.Hewhi
sksmeof
fthe
gr
oundal
l
owi
ngmet
owr
apmyl
egs
ar
oundhi
swai
standpi
nsmeagai
nst
t
hewal
l
.If
eel
hishandsgr
ippi
ngmyass
t
ight
ly.Wear
edev
our
ingeachot
herl
i
ke
hungr
yani
mal
sandourbr
eat
hingi
s
hi
tchi
ng.Thef
eel
ofhi
sbul
geagai
nst
pussysendsanel
ect
ri
cspar
k
t
hroughoutmywhol
ebody.
Imoanmy
needashegr
indsonme.IswearI
’
m
l
eaki
ngr
ightnow.Hebr
eakst
heki
ss
andl
ooksatmewi
thr
edhal
fhooded
ey
es
“
Heybeaut
if
ul”Hi
svoi
cei
sst
rai
ned
“
Hi”Isaybr
eat
hlessl
y
“
I’
m sor
ryt
hatIhav
en’
tbeuuenabl
eto
cal
l
”
“
Iwaswor
ri
edabouty
ou”Isaysof
tl
y
“
Ihav
ebeenbusyI
’
m sor
ryl
etmemake
i
tupt
oyoudi
nnert
oni
ghti
nmypl
aceI
wi
l
lcookf
ory
ou”Il
ookathi
m wi
tha
r
aisedey
ebr
ow
“
Youknowhowt
ocook?
”
“
Ofcour
sewhydoy
ouooksur
pri
sed”
“
BecauseIam sur
pri
sedInev
ert
hought
y
ouknowhowt
ocook”
“
Wel
lIknow.
..
wil
lyouav
ail
your
sel
f?”
“
Ofcour
se”
“
Thedr
iverwi
l
lpi
cky
ouupat7pm”
“
Iwi
l
ldr
ivemy
sel
f”
“
Iinsi
stpl
ease”
“
Okay
”
“
Thanky
ou”Hegi
vesmeabr
eat
he
t
aki
ngki
sst
henput
smedownand
l
ooksatmewi
thsomuchi
ntensi
ty
“
Dammi
tyoudr
ivemecr
azywoman!
”I
bl
ush
“
Ihav
etogobef
orey
oursi
sterandCaba
comet
ocheckuponme.
”
“
OkayIwi
l
lseey
out
oni
ght
”Hepl
ant
sa
peckonmyl
i
psandwal
ksout
.If
ix
my
sel
fandwal
koutt
oomykneesar
e
wobbl
i
ngf
rom al
lthatheat
edki
ss.
“
Wecango”Theybot
hlookatmeasi
f
t
heyar
est
udy
ingmet
henbur
sti
nto
l
aught
er.
“
Mxmy
out
woi
diot
sasambeni
”They
getupandwemakeourwayout
.Zoi
s
dr
ivi
ng.Thedr
ivei
sfi
l
ledwi
tha
conv
ersat
ion,
shedr
opsusonebyone.
I
’
mthel
astonet
obedr
oppedof
f.
“
Mom!
”IshoutasImakemywayi
n
“
Liv
ingr
oom!
”Sheshout
sback.Iwal
kto
t
hel
i
vingandset
tl
enex
ttoher
.She’
s
hav
ingacupoft
eawhi
l
ewat
chi
ngt
v.
“
Usal
ekahl
e”
“
Yeswenay
ouhadagr
eatdaywi
tht
he
l
adi
es?
”
“
YesZol
i
kedCaba.
..
thegi
rl
sar
enot
backy
et?
”
“
TheycamebackbutSoxaskedt
hego
wi
thMi
rat
oosi
nceKamar
iai
snotuse
t
ohi
m.Hewantt
oshowhi
smot
her
Kami
na”
“
Uthi
wher
ewashe?
”
“
Hel
osthi
sphoneormi
spl
acedi
t
somet
hingl
i
ket
hat
”shesi
psonhert
ea
“
Mmh”
“
Youdon’
tli
ket
heboyneh”
“
Iwi
l
ltol
erat
ehi
mfort
hesakeof
Kamar
ia”Wecont
inuewi
thourchat
.I
i
nfor
m heraboutmydi
nnerdat
ewi
thK.
At6pm It
akeal
ongbat
handonceI
’
m
doneIl
ookf
orsomet
hingt
owearbutI
can’
tseem t
odeci
dewhatt
ofear
.I’
m
ner
vousIdon’
tknowwhy
.If
inal
l
y
deci
deonbandager
edcutoutback
body
condr
esswi
thr
edheel
s.It
iedmy
weav
eandappl
yabi
tofmakeupand
r
edl
i
pst
ick.IhopeI
’
m nott
ooov
er
dr
essed.Onel
astt
hingwhi
chi
s
per
fumet
henI
’
m goodt
ogo.It
akemy
cl
utchandmakemywayt
othel
i
ving
r
oom.
“
Wowy
oul
ookbeaut
if
uldr
agongr
anny
!”
“
Thankssweet
hear
t”
“
Twi
rlf
orme”Il
aught
hischi
l
dandt
wir
l
f
orher
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ngar
eyougoi
ngwi
th
me?
”
“
Nobabygr
annyhav
eimpor
tant
meet
ingt
hatsheneedst
oat
tendand
chi
l
drenar
enotal
l
owedbutIwi
l
lgo
wi
thy
out
omor
rowt
othemal
l
”
“
Tobuycooki
esr
ight
”
“
Nopcooki
ear
ebannedi
nthi
shouse”
Mi
rasay
s
“
Mar
aMuui
j
izawhyu-
so”Kamar
iasay
s
r
oll
i
ngherey
es.Godt
hischi
l
diswayol
d
f
orherage!Ihearhoot
“
I’
mleav
inggi
rl
stakecar
eofmymom”
“
Wewi
l
lIhopeuncl
eKwi
l
ltakecar
eof
t
hei
tch”
“
It
’sbeen4y
ear
saynokhosi
de
l
esi
khat
hi”mom addsandt
heybot
h
l
augh.mx
m!
“
Bye!
”IshoutasIwal
kout
.If
indt
he
dr
iveral
readywai
ti
ngf
ormeout
sidet
o
opent
hedoor
.Igr
eethi
m andmakemy
wayi
n.Hecl
osest
hedoorandj
ogst
o
hi
ssi
de.Thedr
ivei
sfi
l
ledwi
th
comf
ort
abl
esi
l
enceandwhenwear
ri
ve
Ki
sal
readywai
ti
ngf
ormeont
hedr
ive
way
.Heopenst
hedoorf
ormeandI
st
epoutoft
hecar
.
“
Greet
ingsmybeaut
if
ull
ady
”
“
Hel
l
ohandsomehowar
eyou”
“
Nowt
haty
ouar
eher
eI’
m okay
.Howar
e
y
oul
ady
”
“
I’
m okayMrMsi
mango”
“
Youl
ookst
unni
ng”Ibl
ush
“
Thanky
ou.
..
youar
enotbady
our
sel
f”
Hel
ookssmashi
ngi
nanav
ypant
s,
whi
tenav
ydot
tedshi
rtandnav
ycoat
.
Hehashi
scutr
e-doneandhi
sbear
edi
s
t
ri
mmedni
cel
ythi
xoIcoul
deathi
m
r
ightnow.Ihav
eat
hingf
ormenwi
th
bear
ed.Hepl
ant
sapeckonmyl
i
psand
t
akesmyhandbef
orel
eadi
ngmet
othe
pool
.Ther
e’sacandl
eli
ghtdi
nnersetup
t
abl
edecor
atedwi
tredr
osesand
f
loat
ingcandl
est
oget
herwi
thr
edr
oses
i
nthepool
whi
chgi
vest
hewat
er
ex
cit
inggl
ow.I
’
mimpr
essedImustsay
.
“
Kthi
sisbeaut
if
ul”Isaysof
tl
y
“
It
’snot
hingcompar
edt
oyourbeaut
y
myj
aancome”Heopenst
hechai
rfor
meandIsi
tdownt
henpushesi
tin
bef
oresi
tt
ingdownbef
oreme.Hepour
s
nonal
cohol
i
cchampagnef
orbot
hofus
andgi
vesmeonegl
ass.
“
Thanky
ou”Icoul
ddowi
ner
ightnow
t
oeasemyner
vesbutheyI
’
m wor
king
onmy
sel
font
hatdepar
tmentandI
’
m
pr
oudt
osayi
t’
sbeenaweekandf
ew
day
sIdr
ankal
cohol
.I’
m sl
owl
ybut
sur
elyget
ti
nguset
othemeet
ingsbutI
hav
en’
tshar
emyst
oryy
et.Wehav
e
cheesebal
l
swi
thspi
cymay
odi
pfor
st
art
ers
“
Youcookedt
hese?
”
”
Yes”
“
Damny
ouar
egoodmos”
“
Iknow”Ichuckl
ear
rogancemuch!
“
Howwasy
ourdaywi
tht
hel
adi
es”
“
ItwasgoodZoandCabacl
i
ckedand
y
our
s”
“
Itwasbusy
”
“
Wit
hwhat
”
“
Justwor
k”He’
snotf
ull
yhonestwi
th
meIcant
ell
butIwi
llethi
m bewhen
he’
sreadyhewi
l
ltel
lme.
“
Howar
ethemeet
ings”
“
OkayIguess”af
terst
art
erswehav
e
cr
eamedsampandt
ri
pest
ewy
esest
his
mancancook.
“
Wemi
ghtaswel
lopenar
est
aur
ant
chefKhuz
ani
thi
stast
eamaz
ing.
”He
smi
l
eswi
del
yandnods
“
Asl
ongasy
ouwi
l
lassi
stmemy
beaut
if
ull
ady
”
“
Ofcour
se.
..
tel
lmewhot
oldy
out
hat
t
ri
pei
smyf
avor
it
e?”
“
Amangot
tadohi
shomewor
k”
“
MmhIsee”Theconv
ersat
ioni
sfl
owi
ng
andt
hef
oodi
samaz
ing.Iev
enhav
ethe
secondt
hatj
usthowgoodhi
sfoodi
s.
Desser
tischocol
atel
asagnawhi
chi
s
al
soamaz
ing.Il
ovehowf
reel
yhei
s
ar
oundmewhi
chmakesmei
teasyf
or
r
eci
procat
e.I
t’
sbaf
fl
esmewhywoul
d
hechoosemet
he“
alcohol
i
cuneducat
ed
wi
dow”ov
erawomenl
i
keKhosi
,
Khet
hiwewhat
everhernamei
s.Cha
phel
athatwomani
sbeaut
if
uland
y
oungert
henmeont
opoft
hatshe’
sa
doct
or.
“
Whyme”Ibl
urti
tout
“
Huh”
“
WhymeImeanKhosi
isbeaut
if
ul,
educat
edandy
oung”
“
She’
snoty
ouBonga.Youar
ethe
womanIwanti
nmyl
i
fe.I
’
m dr
awnt
o
y
oursoul
inawayt
hatIhav
enev
er
bef
ore.Yourpr
esencebr
ingssenseof
peace,
happi
nessandcal
mnesst
omy
hear
tandsoul
.IknowwhatIwantand
t
hati
syouNokubonga.Iwantt
ohol
d
y
oui
nmyar
msf
orr
estofmyl
i
fe.Iwant
t
ogi
veal
lmyt
imeandat
tent
ion.Iwant
t
ogr
owol
dwi
thy
ouandcher
ishev
ery
momentwi
thy
ou.Il
ovey
ousomuch
andandImeani
tjustgi
vemeachance
t
oshowy
ouhowmuchIl
ovey
ou
pl
easemysnookums”Byt
het
imehe
f
ini
sheshe’
sont
hekneel
ooki
ngatme
wi
tht
hosesex
yey
esofhi
sthatmakes
meweaki
ntheknees.
“
I’
m scar
ed”Iwhi
sperast
ear
sfal
ldown
myf
ace
“
IknowandIunder
stand.Idon’
twantt
o
pr
omi
sey
out
hatIwi
l
lnev
erhur
tyou
andal
lbecauset
hatdoesn’
tensur
e
enought
hatIwi
l
lkeepmypr
omi
se.I
hat
epr
omi
sesbecausepeopl
etendt
o
br
eakt
hem easi
l
yngi
funauz
ibonel
e
ngokwakhoukut
hingi
kuphat
hakahl
e
nomachaonl
yify
ougi
vemeachance
t
oshowery
ouwi
thl
ovet
haty
ou
deser
ve,
topr
otecty
ou,
tobey
ourbest
f
ri
endf
ir
stbef
orebei
ngy
ourman,
to
suppor
tyourdr
eamsandt
reaty
oul
i
kea
Queeny
ouar
e,t
opr
aiset
hegr
oundy
ou
wal
kon”If
elteachanev
erywor
dinmy
hear
t.Ismi
l
east
ear
smaket
hei
rway
downi
nvol
unt
ari
l
y.
“
Please”Hewhi
sper
sInodwi
thmy
head.
“
Uthi
nisat
handwasami
Iwantt
ohear
y
ousay
ingi
t”
“
Let
’sgi
vei
tat
ry”Hi
sey
est
winkl
eashe
smi
l
eswi
del
y
“
Youwi
l
lnev
err
egr
ett
his”Hewi
pesmy
t
ear
sandki
ssesme.Theki
ssst
art
edof
sl
owl
yandescal
atei
ntoadeepheat
ed
ki
ss.If
eel
hishandsqueez
ingmybr
east
andmoani
nhi
smout
h.I
’
m dr
ippi
ngwet
andt
odaynomor
ebul
l
etwoundsnor
ar
m st
ri
ngwi
l
lst
andi
nmywayofbe
sex
ief
ied.Myhandf
indi
tswayt
ohi
s
bul
geandsqueez
esi
tcausi
nghi
mto
gr
oani
nmymout
h.Hebr
eakst
heki
ss
andl
ooksatmewi
thdar
kint
enseey
es
“
Ngi
yakuf
unaKhuz
ani
”Isaysof
tl
y
“
Uyangi
funa”
“
Yes”
“
Ungi
funani
”Hesmi
rks
“
Iwantt
ofeel
youi
nsi
deofmeIwant
y
out
omakel
ovet
ome”
“
Arey
ousur
e”Hebr
ushesmyl
i
pswi
th
hi
s
“
Ihav
enev
erbeensur
e”
“
OnceIst
artIwon’
tst
op”Hebi
tesmy
ear
lobe
”
Idon’
twanty
out
ost
op”Imoansof
tl
y.
Hedoesn’
tneedt
obet
oldt
wice,
heget
upandscoopmeupbr
idal
sty
let
hen
makehi
swayt
othehouse,
headi
ngt
o
hi
sbedr
oom.Hegent
lypl
acesmeon
t
hebedandki
ssesmyl
i
psashe
posi
ti
onhi
msel
font
opofme.If
eel
his
handswonder
ingal
lov
ermybody
.I
y
ear
nthef
eel
ofhi
sfl
eshagai
nstmi
ne
buthe’
staki
nghi
sper
fectt
ime
car
essi
ngmybodyov
ermydr
eesswhi
l
e
dev
our
ingmyl
i
psl
i
kehehasn’
tbeen
eat
ingf
ory
ear
s.Heki
sshi
swayt
omy
neckhi
tt
ingasensi
ti
vespotbehi
ndmy
earamoanescapesmymout
h.It
ake
of
fhi
scoatandunbot
tonhi
sshi
rtt
hen
t
akei
tof
frev
eal
i
nghi
sbuf
fsex
ybody
.I
r
unmyf
inger
sti
psonhi
sbodygoi
ng
downt
ohi
smemberandgr
ipi
thel
eta
gr
oanf
rom t
hebackofhi
sthr
oat
.Ina
secondwear
ebot
hnaked.Thesi
ghtof
hi
sbi
gguyst
andi
ngpr
oudl
yandl
eaki
ng
wi
thpr
ecum sat
urat
emyal
ready
dr
ippi
ngwentcunt
.Gr
eedi
nhi
sey
esas
hel
ooksatmynakedbodyf
uel
sfi
re
bet
weenmyl
egs.Hewor
shi
psmybody
wi
thwetki
ssesandbi
tesIswearIf
eel
l
i
keIwi
l
lex
plodebef
oreheev
ensl
i
de
hi
msel
finsi
deofme.Hepl
ant
slong
ki
ssesal
ongt
hel
engt
hofmyi
nner
t
highssendi
ngshockwav
est
hroughout
mybody
.Iscr
eam ashi
smout
hfi
ndmy
wetpussyandhi
stoungesl
i
deandsl
i
ck
al
ongmywef
olds,
lappi
ngupmyj
uices.
“
Yout
ast
ebet
tert
henany
thi
ngIcoul
d
t
hinkof
”Thev
ibr
ati
onofhi
svoi
ce
agai
nstmymoundsendsspar
ksonmy
body
.If
eel
mycl
i
maxbui
l
dingupand
whenI
’
m cl
osehegetupandl
ooksat
me,
hisey
eli
dsar
eheav
ywi
thdesi
re
“
Iwoul
dgoal
lni
ghtar
eyousur
eyou
wantmei
n”
“
Please”Her
ubshi
msel
fupanddown
bef
oresl
i
dingi
nsl
owl
y.If
li
nchi
t’
sbi
t
uncomf
ort
abl
e,Hepusheshi
msel
f
sl
owl
yunt
ilIf
eel
all
ofhi
minsi
deand
gaspf
orai
r.
“
Hol
yJesus!
!!
!”Hegr
oanst
hrowi
nghi
s
headatt
hebackf
orasecondt
hen
l
ooksdownonmedeepi
ntheey
es
bef
orel
i
nki
ngmyhandswi
thhi
sand
pr
essest
hem abov
emyhead.Hest
art
r
oll
i
nghi
shi
psbui
l
dingupt
hespeedof
hi
sthr
ust
s.
“
OhhmyGod!
”Icantcont
ainmymoans
hei
sfi
l
li
ngmegoodandIdon’
tev
en
knowwhatt
odowi
thmy
sel
f.Isqueez
e
myey
eli
dsshutasIenj
oyt
hrust
ingi
n
andoutofme
“
Lookatmesweet
hear
t”Iopenmyey
es
andt
heymeethi
sint
ensegaz
e.”He
makeshar
danddeept
hrust
s
“
Ohhhahhhy
ooooKi
t’
sfeel
sogood!
”
“
Ilov
eyourpussybaby
.Ohhhshi
tso
t
ightandwar
mthf
ucck!
!”Hepoundsme
har
derIl
oseal
lmysenses.Icanf
eel
hi
m deepi
nthepl
acesInev
ert
hought
ex
ist
ed.Hepul
l
soutandmakemef
ace
t
heheadboar
dwi
thmybackar
chedabi
t.
Hesl
i
det
hepi
l
lowbet
weenmyl
egsand
spanksmybut
tov
erandov
eragai
n.
Jesuswhati
sthi
smandoi
ngt
ome.He
ent
ershi
msel
fwi
thonepushf
rom t
he
behi
ndandst
artbucki
nghi
shi
swhi
l
e
gr
ippi
nghar
donmywai
st.Ibal
ancemy
handsont
heheadboar
dashepumps
i
ntomehar
derandhar
dert
aki
ngmet
o
awor
ldofecst
asyt
hatIf
indmy
sel
f
scr
eami
ngt
he3wor
dsandf
unnyI
meant
hem.
“
Ilov
eyouDaddyK”
“
Ilov
eyout
oosnookums.Shi
tt
ttahhh
Bongawami
usungowami
angi
thi
”
“
YesssbabyI
’
myour
s”
“
All
ofy
oui
sbel
ongt
omeev
ent
his
goodpussyofy
our
s!”
“
All
ofme!Takemeal
l
!Ngi
yaz
ini
kel
a
kuweMsi
mango”
“
Ahhhshi
tt
tthanky
oust
handwaohhmy
Jesus!
!”Ourscr
eamsofpl
easur
eand
f
leshhi
tt
ingagai
nstf
leshf
il
ll
his
bedr
oom.If
eel
itbui
l
dingi
tupahh”
“
Im cumi
ngbaby
”
“
Cum f
ordaddyKbabyohy
esss”He
t
hrusthar
derandf
ast
erIgr
oanandmy
bodyshudderasIr
elease.
“
Shi
t!
”Hegr
oansasheal
l
owmet
ori
de
mywav
eIt
houghthewi
l
lletmegat
her
my
sel
ffi
rstbutnohe
pul
l
soutandscoopsmeupIwr
apmy
l
egsar
oundhi
swai
st.Hepi
nsme
agai
nstt
hewal
landpushesi
nsi
deof
mewi
thonepushIwhi
mper
.
“
FuckIcantgetenoughofy
ourhot
pussy
!Isweari
t’
sgoi
ngt
obemy
addi
cti
on”Hesuppor
tmybut
twi
thhi
s
handsandhumpi
ntomehar
danddeep.
Il
ovehowhewantt
olookdeepi
ntomy
ey
est
ryi
ngt
oreadmyev
eryr
eact
ion
t
hrustbyt
hrust
.Isweart
hisman’
sdi
ck
wi
l
lhebet
hedeat
hofme.He’
snotonl
y
gi
ft
edbutheal
soknowshowt
ouset
he
t
ooI
.IswearIhav
enev
erbeensex
ifi
ed
l
i
ket
hisi
nmyl
i
fe.He’
sconnect
ingwi
th
mysoul
thr
ustbyt
hrustr
eachi
ngev
ery
chor
dofmybei
ngt
hatIf
eel
myt
ear
s
f
all
i
ngdowni
nvol
unt
ari
l
y.Sexi
sthe
mostbeaut
if
ulandpower
ful
thi
ngGod
hasev
ercr
eat
edt
ofor
m deep
connect
ionbet
weent
wopeopl
ewhoar
e
i
nlov
ewi
theachot
her
.Thi
smanhas
ener
gyf
orday
sandhi
smemberi
s
al
way
sreadyt
opl
ayev
enaf
terr
eleasi
ng.
Byt
het
imeI
’
m onmy5t
hor
gasm he’
s
appr
oachi
ngf
orhi
sthi
rd.Hedi
dsayhe
won’
tst
oponcehest
artandt
hinki
ngof
mydr
oughtIt
houghtIwi
l
lkeepupbut
nowIcan’
t.Hehasmyar
msonhi
sone
handpr
essedt
oget
herbehi
ndmyback
ashepoundsonmef
rom behi
ndwhi
l
e
spanki
ngmybut
twi
tht
heot
herhand.
“
Shi
tBonga!Il
ovei
twhenbentov
erf
or
me!Lookatassf
uck!
!”He’
sspanksmy
but
t
“
BabyI
’
mti
rednowIcan’
ttakei
t
any
mor
e!”mykneesar
ewobbl
i
ngI
swearIwi
l
lfal
lanymoment
“
Justasecondmyl
ove.
..
onesecond”
I
t’
stakedeephar
dandf
astf
ewt
hrust
s
f
orhi
mtor
eachhi
shi
ghandempt
yhi
s
seedi
nsi
deofme.
“
Dammnn!
!”mykneesgi
vei
nbuthe
cat
chesmebef
oreIf
all
andwal
kswi
th
met
othebed.Hegent
lyt
ucksmei
n
andgeti
n,pul
l
ingmeonhi
schest
.I’
m
dogt
ir
edmywhol
ebodyi
sst
il
lshi
ver
ing.
Thi
smant
hor
oughl
ysex
ifi
edmej
eal
ous
down
“
Thatwasamaz
ingt
hanky
oust
handwa
sami
”Hesay
srunni
nghi
sfi
nger
sonmy
bar
eback
“
Whuuuayuny
obonamf
okaMsi
mango
j
eal
ousdown.
”Hegi
ggl
es
“
IthoughtIwi
l
lkeepupwi
thy
ouay
ngekendoda”
“
Itol
dyouonceIst
artIwon’
tst
op”He
ki
ssesmyf
oreheadandt
akesi
nahuge
br
eat
h.
“
Tal
ktome”Isayr
unni
ngmyf
inger
son
hi
schest
“
Ithi
nkourl
i
vesar
eindanger
”
“
Whydoy
ousayso”
“
Theguywhowaskeepi
nganey
eon
Khany
iformel
osther
.She’
soutt
her
e
andIknowshe’
shungr
yforourbl
ood”
CHAPTER47

“
Theguywhowaskeepi
nganey
eon
Khany
iformel
osther
.She’
soutt
her
e
andIknowshe’
shungr
yforourbl
ood”I
nev
ert
houghtIwi
l
lheart
henameagai
n
andIdon’
thowIex
pect
edt
hatwhen
she’
sst
il
lal
i
ve.Il
ookupathi
m andour
ey
esmeet
.
“
Youhadsomeonekeepi
nganey
eon
her
”
“
Yesi
twast
heonl
ywayt
oknowwhat
she’
supt
o”
“
Arghj
ustl
etherbe”Hechuckl
esand
shakeshi
shead.
“
Youdon’
tknowhowdanger
ousKhany
i
i
sBonga.Iseey
out
aket
hisl
i
ght
ly
hencey
ousai
dImustl
ethergo.Youar
e
under
est
imat
ingher
,shehadpeopl
eto
ki
dnapmydaught
ersot
hatIt
ell
Vusi
ev
ery
thi
ng,
whatmor
eisshecapabl
eof
doi
ng.Youdon’
tknowherl
i
keIdo”
“
She’
sthatdanger
ous?
”
“
Ver
ydanger
ous.Mf
anesi
lostt
heuseof
peni
sbecauseofKhany
i”
“
Youar
ely
ing!
”
“
I’
mtel
l
ingy
ouhewassex
ual
l
yabusi
ng
herandKhany
iwasf
ri
endswi
thmy
babysi
ster
,that
'showImether
.She
becamemyl
i
ttl
esi
stert
oo.Whenshe
t
oldusaboutMf
ani
seni
,Iwant
edt
oki
l
l
t
hebast
ardwi
thmyhandsbutKhany
i
t
oldmet
oleti
tgo,
onl
ytof
indoutt
hat
shewaspl
anni
ngt
oav
engeher
sel
f.She
pour
edaci
donhi
smanhoodandhel
ost
t
heuseofi
t”I
’
m shook,
Ireal
l
y
under
est
imat
edher
“
Yhooshe’
sdanger
ousK,
whatar
ewe
goi
ngt
odo?
”
“
Fort
hef
ir
stt
imei
nmyl
i
fe,
Idon’
tknow
Bonga.Ihav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
otr
ackher
down.I
’
m af
rai
dshewi
l
lhi
tuswhenwe
ar
eleastex
pect
ingi
t.If
earf
orour
chi
l
drenbecausesheknowst
heyar
e
ourweakness”Thet
houghtofmy
daught
erandmygr
anddaught
erget
ti
ng
hur
tisunbear
abl
e
“
NoK,
youhav
etodosomet
hing!
”
“
Itol
dyout
hatweneedt
odeal
wit
hher
buty
ousai
dImustkeepheraynawe
Bonga”
“
Comeony
ouwant
edmet
oal
l
owy
ou
t
oki
l
lmyni
eceaf
tert
hepai
nshewent
t
hroughbecauseofme.If
eel
gui
l
ty
al
ready
,ex
cusemef
oraski
ngy
out
o
spar
eherl
i
fe!
”
“
Iwasn’
tgoi
ngt
oki
l
lherdoy
out
hink
I
’
m cr
uel
li
ket
hat
.Iwasgoi
ngt
osend
hert
ojai
lst
rai
ght
!”
“
Wecanst
il
ldot
hatbaby
,pl
easeIwon’
t
beabl
etohandl
ethepai
nofseei
ngmy
daught
erandgr
anddaught
erget
ti
ng
hur
t”
“
Wecan’
tsendhert
ojai
lnow,
whowi
l
l
r
aiseherson”
“
Shegotason?
”
“
Uhm y
es”
“
Howol
dishe”
“
Kamar
ia’
sage”
“
Nodon’
ttel
lmehe’
sKhumal
o’sson?
”
“
Uhm hei
s”myhear
tsdr
opst
omy
st
omach
“
Andy
ounev
ert
oldmeany
thi
ngabout
t
hat
?”
“
Idi
dn’
tthi
nki
twasi
mpor
tant
”Wow
“
Khany
ihasachi
l
dwi
thmyl
ate
husbandandy
oudi
dn’
tthi
nki
twas
i
mpor
tantt
otel
lmer
eal
l
yKhuz
ani
!”
“
Yaz
ibonauqal
alent
oyakho
y
okungi
thet
hisa”Iwi
ggl
emy
sel
foutof
hi
sembr
aceandr
oll
outofbed.
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
I’
m goi
nghome”Il
ookf
ormypant
ies
butIcan’
tfi
ndi
t.Ourcl
othesar
e
scat
ter
edar
oundt
hef
loor
.
“
YazBongaIdon’
tunder
standwhyy
ou
ar
eangr
y.Whatdoesi
therhav
ingason
wi
thy
ourl
atehusbandhast
odowi
th
y
ou?
”
“
Ideser
vet
oknowdammi
t!
”I’
m wal
ki
ng
upanddowni
nthi
shugebedr
oom
sear
chi
ngf
ormypant
iesandt
he
bur
ningi
nmyv
agi
nai
snotmaki
ngi
t
easyf
orme
“
Wher
e’smydamnpant
y!”Ir
oari
nanger
,
am Iov
err
eact
ing?NoIdon’
tthi
nkso,
I
deser
vedt
oknowt
hatmyl
atehusband
hasadaught
erwi
thmyni
ece.Ibend
ov
ert
opi
ckmybr
afr
om t
hef
loorand
f
eel
ast
ingonmybut
t.
“
Ahhh”Hespanksmybut
tagai
nand
agai
ncausi
ngmet
omoan.Hepul
l
sme
up,
pressi
ngmybackonhi
sbodyandI
f
eel
hiscockpoki
ngmybut
t
“
Youar
enotgoi
ngany
wher
esnookums”
Hewhi
sper
sinmyearsendi
ngchi
l
ls
downmyspi
newhi
l
esqueez
ingmy
boobs.Ihat
ehowmybodyr
eact
i
nvol
unt
ari
l
ytohi
stouchbutI
’
m not
goi
ngt
oshowhi
m no!I
’
m angr
yri
ght
nowandheneedst
oacknowl
edget
hat
!
“
Younotgoi
ngt
ost
opme”Hesepar
ate
myt
highswi
thhi
skneeandr
ubsmycl
i
t
wi
thf
inger
sst
il
lcar
essi
ngmyboobwi
th
t
heot
herhand.It
ryt
owi
ggl
emy
sel
fout
ofhi
shol
dbuthehol
dsmei
npl
ace
“
LetgoofmeK”I
t’
scomesoutasa
moan.Lor
dknowshowmuchI
’
mtr
ying
t
ocont
ainmy
sel
fbutt
hismanher
eis
maki
ngmewetal
lov
eragai
n
“
I’
m notl
ett
ingy
ougoi
nthi
sti
meoft
he
ni
ghtespeci
all
ywheny
ouar
eangr
yat
me”
“
I….
.whuuuu”It
ryt
opr
otestbuthecut
meof
fwi
thonepushIf
eel
him deepi
n
mywomb.Het
hrust
sinandoutofme
whi
l
ewor
kingonmycl
i
t.IswearIwant
t
ost
ophi
m butt
het
hingshe’
sdoi
ngt
o
mear
enotal
l
owi
ngme.Damny
ou
Khuz
ani
!Iar
chmybackabi
tandt
ake
al
lofhi
sbi
gcocki
nandoutofme.The
r
oom i
sfi
l
ledwi
thmyuncont
rol
l
abl
e
scr
eamsandhi
sfl
eshhi
tt
ingagai
nst
mi
ne.Idon’
tunder
standwher
ethi
sman
getener
gy.Hepul
l
soutandpushesme
t
othebed,
themomentbybackhi
tst
he
bed,
heget
sont
opofmeandsl
i
de
i
nsi
deme,
Ist
opbr
eat
hing.Hedr
opshi
s
headandcl
aim myl
i
ps,
itt
akessl
owbut
deepst
rokesf
orbot
hofust
oreachour
cl
i
max
.
“
I’
m sor
ryf
ornott
ell
i
ngy
ou,
Ireal
l
y
t
houghty
ouwant
ednot
hingt
odowi
th
her
”Hesay
saf
tercat
chi
nghi
sbr
eat
h
butst
il
ldeepi
nsi
deofme
“
It
’sokaybutnex
tti
medon’
tthi
nkf
or
meKpl
ease”
“
Not
edst
handwasami
.”Hesmi
l
esand
pl
ant
sapeckonmyl
i
pst
hensl
i
dehi
s
handunderhi
spi
l
lowandt
akeoutmy
pant
ies.
“
Wer
eyoul
ooki
ngf
ort
his?
”Hesay
s
wi
thasmi
rksonhi
sface.Sneakyman!
“
I’
m noty
ourgr
annyi
diot
!”Hegi
ggl
es
“
Youwant
edt
oleav
enj
ena”
“
Mxm sukaphekwami
”Isul
kpushi
ng
hi
m of
fme
“
Youl
ooksocut
e”Hegi
vesmea
br
eat
htaki
ngki
sst
hatl
eav
esmepant
ing
“
Ilov
eyoumyj
aan”
“
Ilov
eyoumor
emydaddyK”Hesmi
l
es
wi
del
yandr
oll
overt
henpul
l
smeonhi
s
chest
.
“
Don’
twor
ryaboutKhany
i,Iwi
l
lsee
whatIcando”
“
Iwi
shshecanf
orgi
vemey
ouknow,
I
wi
sht
her
ewasawaywecanmov
epast
t
hisandbeaf
ami
l
y.Khany
iisbr
okenK,
sheneedsl
ove,
car
eandwar
mthand
I
’
m wi
l
li
ngt
ogi
vehert
hatasheraunt
”
“
Iheary
oubabyandIwi
shIcangr
ant
al
lyourhear
tdesi
rest
omakey
ou
happy
”
“
YoudomakemehappyKandf
ort
hat
I
’
m sogr
atef
ul”Heki
ssesmyf
orehead
andr
unhi
sfi
nger
ti
psonmyback,
it’
s
soot
hingandIcanf
eel
mysel
fdr
if
ti
ng
awayt
osl
umber
.I’
m wokenbyt
he
f
eel
i
ngofsomeonest
ari
ngatme,
Ibl
i
nk
myey
esopenandmeethi
spai
r.
“
Goodmor
ningmyj
aan”Hesmi
l
esandI
can'
thel
pbutr
etur
nit
.
“
Mor
ningbaby
”Isayy
awni
ng.I
’
m so
ex
haust
edandmybodyi
sachi
ng.If
eel
l
i
keIwasr
unni
ngmount
ains.
“
Howdi
dyousl
eep”
“
Isl
eptl
i
keababyt
hanky
ou,
whati
s
t
hatsmel
l
”
“
Imadey
oubr
eakf
ast
”Icoul
dgetuset
o
t
his
“
Yousuchadar
li
ng”Hegr
absmyboot
y
andsqueez
esi
tcausi
ngmet
omoan.
“
Thanky
ouf
orbr
eakf
ast
,letmewash
mymout
h”Ir
oll
outofbedcar
eful
l
yand
pul
lhi
srobe.Isl
i
dei
nhi
ssl
i
pper
s
bef
oremaki
ngmywayt
ohi
sbat
hroom
whi
chpr
ovest
omedi
ff
icul
tduet
othe
bur
ningdownt
her
e.Ist
artbyr
eleasi
ng
my
sel
ffi
rst
,yoooht
hismangr
il
ledmy
pussy
.Ibr
ushmyt
eet
husi
nghi
s
t
oot
hbr
usht
henmakemywayt
othe
bedr
oom.Igetnex
ttohi
m andhef
eeds
mewhi
l
edr
inki
ngsomet
hingl
li
kea
soup.
“
What
’st
hat
?”
“
Isobhol
eskobho”
“
It
’ssmel
l
sni
cecanIt
ast
e”
“
Nopeeaty
ourbr
eakf
astandf
orget
aboutsoups”
“
ButIwanti
ttoo”
“
Iwi
l
lcookanysoupf
ory
ounott
his
one”
“
Whatspeci
alaboutt
his”
“
Youwi
l
lfi
ndouti
ntwoweeks’
time
whenal
i
ttl
eKhuz
zyi
sgi
vi
ngy
ouahar
d
t
ime”Hewi
ggl
eshi
sey
ebr
ows.
“
Hai
boKhuz
ani
pleasedon’
ttel
lmey
ou
wantababy
”
“
Idowantababy
,asonspeci
fi
cal
l
y”
“
Don’
tyout
hinkwear
etoool
dfora
baby
”
“
Wear
enott
oool
dtohav
eason
snookums”
“
YhoangekeKhuz
ani
”
“
Ify
ousayso”Heshr
ugsandcont
inues
si
ppi
ngonhi
ssoup.
“
Stopdr
inki
ngt
hist
hingke”Hel
aughs
“
Iwaski
ddi
ngt
hisi
sjustasoupnj
e”
“
Letmedr
inki
t”
“
Uzomi
l
ait
otol
ozi
”(Youwi
l
lgr
owadi
ck)
Ibur
sti
ntol
aught
er.
“
Angi
nandaba”(
Idon’
tcar
e)
“
Wuuumi
nangi
nendaba
ngi
ngal
i
bhekel
waubani
jehov
a”(
Ido
car
ehowwi
l
lIhandl
eitj
ehov
a)Ican'
t
hel
pbutl
aughathi
scomi
cal
expr
essi
on.
“
Youl
ovemenj
enasoy
ouwi
l
lhav
eto
handl
eit
”
“
Yhooongekest
handwasami
,i
twoul
d
cr
eept
hehel
loutofme.Il
ovey
ouso
muchmar
aify
ouwer
etogr
owadi
ck,
I
swearngi
zokushi
yaekuseni
sisi
”He
say
sdr
amat
ical
l
ymaki
ngmet
oshr
iek
wi
thl
aught
er.If
ini
sheat
ingmy
br
eakf
astandwehi
tashowert
oget
her
whi
cht
akesf
orev
erbecauset
hisman
can’
tgetenoughofmycuntbutI
’
m not
compl
aini
ng.Oncewear
edone,
Imake
t
hebedf
ir
stbef
oreget
ti
ngdr
essed.He
hast
orusht
owor
ksohel
eadsmet
o
hi
sjaguarwhi
l
ehet
akest
her
over
.We
ki
sst
hendr
ivesepar
atel
y.Ideci
det
o
cal
lZo.
“
Skoni
sami
”Igi
ggl
e
“
Hel
l
ohowar
eyou”
“
I’
m goodwena?
”
“
I’
mfi
ne.
..
arey
ouatwor
k,Ineedt
osee
y
ounow”
“
Yes”
“
I’
m comi
ng”
“
Okay
”Ihungupanddr
ivet
othe
phar
macyf
ir
stt
obuymor
ningaf
terand
downt
hem t
hendr
ivet
othehospi
tal
.
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul”Zosay
sthe
momentsheseesme
“
Thanky
ou”Ismi
l
eandwesi
tdown.
“
Iwast
hinki
ngoft
hrowi
ngawel
come
par
tyf
orMi
raandKamar
ia”
“
That
’sawonder
ful
ideaBongaI
’
m sur
e
Mi
rawi
l
lbehappy
”
“
Iknowt
hatapar
tyi
snot
hingbutIj
ust
wantt
hem t
obehappyespeci
all
yMi
ra
af
terev
ery
thi
ngshehasbeent
hrough.I
wanthert
oknowt
hatIl
ovehersomuch
andIcoul
dn’
thav
easkedf
orabet
ter
daught
ert
hanher
”
“
OhBongat
hat
’ssosweet
”Ismi
l
e
“
Yeah.
..
ther
easonI
’
m her
eIwantt
obe
onbi
rt
hcont
rol
”Shel
ooksatme
“
Ohmywescr
atchedt
hei
tch”Inod
shy
ly
“
Final
l
y!Tel
lmet
hewai
twaswor
thi
t?”
“
Youhav
enoi
deat
hatbr
otherofy
our
s
i
sast
all
i
onIt
ell
you”Wegi
ggl
e
“
Ineedt
obeoncont
racept
ivenow
bef
orehemakesmepr
egnant
.Hewant
asoncabanga”shel
aughs
“
Youar
elaughi
ng,
it’
snotf
unny
cabangaugogoongangami
hav
inga
chi
l
d”
“
Hai
bosi
yay
funai
ndl
ali
fakaMsi
mango
makot
i”
“
Uyahl
any
a!”Shebur
sti
ntol
aught
er.
She’
sreal
l
ycr
azyt
oget
herwi
thher
br
otherndl
ali
fay
ani
.

I
’
m maki
ngbr
eakf
astwi
tht
he“
hel
p”of
mydaught
er.I
’
minagoodmoodt
hese
day
s.
“
Mommyt
heeggsar
ebur
ning!
”
“
Thanky
oubaby
”Il
owert
hest
ove,
I
l
ovet
hatmom nev
erchangedat
hingi
n
t
hishouse.Ev
ery
thi
ngi
sst
il
lequi
pped
andl
abel
edt
hewayi
twasf
ormeaf
ter
al
lthesey
ear
s.Idi
shupf
ort
het
hreeof
us,
mom di
dn’
tcomebackl
astni
ght
f
rom t
hedi
nnerwi
thuncl
eK.Speaki
ng
oft
hei
rrel
ati
onshi
p,Idon’
tknowhowI
f
eel
aboutt
hei
rrel
ati
onshi
pbuti
fhe
makesmymom happyt
henI
’
m happy
.
I
’
m st
il
lnotov
erwhathedi
dandI
’
m
sur
eyoumustbecal
l
ingmeahy
pocr
it
e
t
hatIf
orgav
eLwenkosi
butIhav
en’
t
f
orgi
venhi
suncl
e.Wel
lther
easoni
s
t
hatLwenkosi
apol
ogi
zedt
omeandhe
showedmehowr
emor
sef
ulhei
sabout
whathedi
dunl
i
kehi
suncl
e.Yeshe
mi
ghthav
efoundmeandmydaught
er
butt
oheart
het
wowor
dsf
rom hi
m“I
’
m
sor
ry”woul
dmakemehappy
.Iwanthi
m
t
ocomeher
eandacknowl
edgehi
s
mi
stakesi
nfr
ontme.Iwantt
ofeel
his
si
ncer
eapol
ogy
.
“
Goandcal
lgogo”
“
Okay
”Ihearherr
unni
ng,
minut
esl
ate
t
heybot
hcomeback
“
Mmhi
t’
ssmel
l
sni
ce”
“
Mor
ninggogo”
“
Mor
ningbaby
”sheki
ssesmyf
orehead
andwesi
tdownandeat
.
“
Thanky
ouf
ormaki
ngbr
eakf
astsi
si”
“
It
’sokaygogo”
“
Mir
a”
“
Gogo”
“
Iwantt
oapol
ogi
zef
ort
hepai
nIput
y
ouandmom t
hrough.Iknowy
ouhat
e
mef
ort
hatandIhat
emy
sel
fforwhatI
di
d.Pl
easef
orgi
vememz
ukul
uandgi
ve
meachancei
nyourl
i
fe”
“
Idon’
that
eyougogo,
it’
sjustt
hatmy
mom wentt
hroughal
ot.I
tpai
nsme,
y
ouknowbutIdon’
that
eyou.
”
“
Canwet
ryt
owor
kthi
ngsoutIpr
omi
se
t
obet
hebestgr
andmot
herev
er”Ismi
l
e
“
Youhav
ebeenagr
eatgr
annyt
hese
f
ewday
sandIt
hinkIl
ovey
ou”She
gi
ggl
es
“
Thanky
ousweet
hear
tIl
ovey
ou”we
cont
inuet
oeatourbr
eakf
astwhi
l
eshe
shar
esherf
unnyst
ori
es.Af
terbr
eakf
ast
wechi
l
ltoget
herj
ustget
ti
ngt
oknow
oneanot
her
.Gr
amshadi
nter
est
ing
chi
l
dhood.
“
Hel
l
omyf
avor
it
egi
rl
sint
hewhol
e
wor
ld”Mom say
sasshewal
ksi
n.Ican
heari
nherv
oicet
hatshe’
sinagood
moodwhi
chmeansshegoti
tdown
“
Dragongr
annyy
ousai
dwear
egoi
ngt
o
t
hemal
ltodayt
obuycooki
es”Thi
sgi
rl
nev
erf
orgetandwi
tht
hatsai
dweal
l
l
eav
eformal
laf
termom changedher
dr
ess.Wedosomeshoppi
ngandmom
f
orcesmet
odosomet
hingonmyhai
r.I
coul
dn’
tsaynocozt
heywer
eal
l
gangi
nguponmenow.Ichooseat
hin
l
ongt
wistandbyt
het
imeIf
ini
shmy
but
tispai
nful
.Weeatatwi
mpy
,pert
he
l
i
ttl
epr
incess’
schoi
ce.Oncewear
e
donewebuyt
akeaway
sandl
eav
e.The
daywaswel
lspentwi
thmy3gi
rl
sandI
coul
dn’
tbehappi
er.

“
Dol
l
face!Dol
l
face!
”Ihearhi
svoi
cei
n
mydeepsl
eep
“
Opent
hewi
ndowpl
ease!
”Godt
hisboy
doesn’
tli
sten!Ir
oll
outofbedandopen
t
hewi
ndowf
orhi
m.
“
Hel
l
o”
“
Youdon’
tli
stenwena”
“
Imi
ssedy
ousomuch”
“
AymaanLwenkosi
!”
“
Let
’sgohi
tthecl
ub”
“
Now?
”
“
Yesbaby
,pl
ease”
“
HayLwenkosi
”
“
Pleasebaby
,Ipr
omi
sei
twi
l
lbef
un.I
j
ustwannahav
edr
inkswi
thy
ou”
“
Whatt
imei
sitnow”
“
It
’s9pm.I
twi
l
lbef
uny
ouwi
l
lsee.Iwi
l
l
makesur
eyouenj
oyy
ourf
ir
st
ex
per
iencei
nthecl
ub”
“
Howdoy
ouknowi
t’
smyf
ir
stt
ime”He
l
aughs,
I’
mtempt
edt
hiscoul
dbef
un
y
az.Ineedt
oloosenupabi
tandhav
e
f
unl
i
keanyot
her23y
earol
dpl
us
Kamar
iai
ssl
eepi
ngwi
thmymom.
“
Okayl
etmef
reshenup”
“
Yess!
”In15mi
nut
esI
’
m doneweuse
t
hewi
ndowt
omakeourwayout
.Thi
s
boyi
smaki
ngmer
ebel
l
iousI
’
mtel
l
ing
y
ou,
wesi
ngal
ongmusi
cunt
ilwear
ri
ve
t
othecl
ub.Hi
shandi
snotl
eav
ingmi
ne
aswemakeourent
rance.Thev
ibei
s
ex
cit
ingandmusi
cisbl
ast
ing.Wesi
tby
t
hebaronbarchai
rsandor
dershot
s.
”
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ngwi
thme”
“
Youar
egoi
ngt
omakemymom ki
l
lme
wena”
“
Bonganeedst
ochi
l
lkancane”Thebar
manbr
ingsourshot
sandwedown
t
hem.
“
Peopl
ear
elooki
ngatus”Hesay
s
“
Wel
ltheyar
elooki
ngaty
ouact
ual
l
y,I
’
m
nocel
ebr
it
y”
“
Theyst
il
lrecogni
zey
our
emembert
he
compet
it
iony
ouwon.Someonet
ooka
pi
cofusy
est
erdayatushakaki
d’swor
ld
andi
tst
rendi
ng”
“
NoLwenkosi
,whydi
dn’
tyout
ell
me!
”
“
I’
mtel
l
ingy
ounownj
ebaby
”
“
Whatar
etheysay
ing”
“
Peopl
ear
edy
ingt
oheary
ourv
oice
Dol
l
face”
“
Hay
i”
“
What
’swr
ongnow”
“
I’
m notr
eady
”
“
Wheny
ouwi
l
lber
eady
?”
“
Canwenott
alkaboutt
hispl
ease,
tel
l
mewhatel
sedi
dtheysay
,becauseI
knowt
hatt
her
ear
eal
sonast
y
comment
s”
“
Theyt
hinkKamar
iai
sour
s,somel
ove
ust
oget
herandsomear
ecal
l
ingy
ou
cr
uel
forkeepi
ngmydaught
eraway
f
rom me.
”
“
Mxm badaki
weabaphumenj
e
ez
indabeni
zami
!”
“
Ihav
ebeendeny
ingi
nter
viewst
he
whol
edayt
heywantmysi
deofst
ory
aboutt
his”
“
Sowhatar
eyougoi
ngt
odo?
”
“
Itwi
l
lbl
owov
er,
Idon’
toweany
oneany
ex
planat
ionandbesi
desKamar
iai
s
mi
neasmuchasshe’
syour
s”Het
akes
myhandandki
ssesi
t.
“
Sowhatdi
dyourgi
rl
fr
iendsay
”
“
Shedumpedme”
“
HaaaLwenkosi
andy
ouar
enotdoi
ng
somet
hingaboutt
hat
”
“
Itr
iedt
oex
plai
ntoherbutshedi
dn’
t
gi
vemeachance.Ngashi
swai
l
anga
dol
l
faceusukul
onkel
uthoumunt
u
ukuphumakubo.Ci
shengal
uny
wa
nay
izi
nja”Ibur
sti
ntol
aught
er
“
Don’
tlaugh,
it’
snotf
unny
.Iwokeupi
n
t
heear
lyhour
soft
hemor
ninganddr
ove
t
oeDumbeonl
ytobebur
ntbyt
hesun
andal
mostgotbeat
enbydogs.
”If
eel
a
patonmyshoul
der
“
Mir
acl
eist
haty
ou”
“
Uhm y
es”
“
Goshwhendi
dyoucomeback?We
wer
elooki
ngf
orwar
dtohear
ingy
our
v
oice.I
’
myourbi
ggestf
an”she
squeez
esmei
nherar
ms,
okayi
tcaught
mebysur
pri
set
hatIal
mostf
ell
“
Heybecar
eful
!”Say
sLwenkosi
“
Sor
ry.I
’
m Tr
acy
”
“
Nicet
omeety
ouTr
acy
”
“
Cany
ousi
ngusachor
uspl
ease”
“
NoI
’
m sor
ry…”
“
Please…I
’
m comi
ng”
“
Ohoohoshe’
stal
ki
ngwi
tht
hedj
”
Lwenkosi
say
s
“
Heyev
ery
onewehav
eMi
racl
eint
he
house,
rememberourbeaut
if
ulgi
rlt
hat
wont
heSATsi
ngi
ngcompet
it
iony
ear
s
ago.Her
eshei
sov
ert
her
ebybar”Oh
no,
theyar
enotdoi
ngt
hist
ome!Ihear
scr
eamsofcheer
“
Shewantt
ogi
veusachor
us,
peopl
e
l
et’
sgi
vei
tupf
orMi
racl
e!”
“
YhooLwenkosi
Ican’
t”
“
Comeonbabyy
oucandot
his”
“
Nono,
let
’sgo!
”
“
Mir
acl
e!Mi
racl
e!Mi
racl
e!”Ihearpeopl
e
chant
ing
“
ComebabyIwi
l
lsi
ngwi
thy
ou”He
t
akesmyhandandwemakeourwayt
o
t
hest
age.TheDj
giv
esmeami
c.
“
Whatar
ewegoi
ngt
osi
ng”Lwenkosi
whi
speri
nmyear
“
Per
fectduetbyEdSheer
anand
Bey
once”Het
ell
sthedj
andwest
art
si
ngi
ng
“
Ifoundal
ovef
orme
Ohdar
li
ng,
justdi
ver
ighti
nandf
oll
ow
myl
ead
Wel
l
,If
oundagi
rl
,beaut
if
ulandsweet
Oh,
Inev
erknewy
ouwer
ethesomeone
wai
ti
ngf
orme
'
Causewewer
ejustki
dswhenwef
ell
in
l
ove
Notknowi
ngwhati
twas
Iwi
l
lnotgi
vey
ouupt
hist
ime
Butdar
li
ng,
justki
ssmesl
ow,
yourhear
t
i
sal
lIown
Andi
nyourey
es,
you'
rehol
dingmi
ne
Baby
,I'
m danci
ngi
nthedar
kwi
thy
ou
bet
weenmyar
ms
Bar
efootont
hegr
ass,
li
steni
ngt
oour
f
avour
it
esong
Wheny
ousai
dyoul
ookedamess,
I
whi
sper
edunder
neat
hmybr
eat
h
Buty
ouhear
dit
,dar
li
ng,
youl
ook
per
fectt
oni
ght
”Lwenkosi
singsEd
Sheer
anv
erseandIf
oll
owwi
th
Bey
oncé’
sver
se

“
Wel
lIf
oundaman,
str
ongert
han
any
oneIknow
Heshar
esmydr
eams,
Ihopet
hat
somedaywe'
l
lshar
eahome
If
oundal
ove,
tocar
rymor
ethanj
ust
mysecr
ets
Tocar
ryl
ove,
tocar
rychi
l
drenofour
own
Wear
est
il
lki
ds,
butwe'
resoi
nlov
e
Fi
ght
ingagai
nstal
lodds
Iknowwe'
l
lbeal
ri
ghtt
hist
ime
Dar
li
ng,
justhol
dmyhand
Bey
ourgi
rl
,you'
l
lbemyman
AndIseemyf
utur
einy
ourey
es”
Wesi
ngt
hechor
ust
oget
her
“
Wel
lbaby
,I'
m danci
ngi
nthedar
k,wi
th
y
oubet
weenmyar
ms
Bar
efootont
hegr
ass,
whi
l
eli
steni
ngt
o
ourf
avor
it
esong
WhenIsawy
oui
nthatdr
ess,
looki
ngso
beaut
if
ul
Idon'
tdeser
vet
his,
dar
li
ng,
youl
ook
per
fectt
oni
ght

Baby
,I'
m danci
ngi
nthedar
k,wi
thy
ou
bet
weenmyar
ms
Bar
efootont
hegr
ass,
whi
l
eli
steni
ngt
o
ourf
avor
it
esong
Ihav
efai
thi
nwhatIsee
NowIknowIhav
emetanangel
in
per
son
Andshel
ooksper
fect
Andhel
ooksper
fect
NoIdon'
tdeser
vet
his
Youl
ookper
fectt
oni
ght
”Thebondand
connect
ioncan’
tbemi
ssedaswesi
ng.
Thescr
eamsf
il
lst
hecl
ubwowsomuch
l
ovei
sov
erwhel
ming.It
hankev
ery
one
f
ort
hei
rsuppor
tandt
heywantt
oknow
wher
eIwasandi
fwi
l
lev
erst
artsi
ngi
ng.
It
ell
them i
t’
sal
ongst
orybutIpr
omi
se
t
oshar
eitoneday
.Lwenkosi
deci
de
t
hatwegot
otheVI
Psect
ionnow
becausepeopl
ear
est
art
ingt
ocr
owd
ourspace.Thedr
inksar
efl
owi
ngI
’
m
hav
ingf
un,
bestt
imeofmyl
i
fe.If
eel
so
y
oungandcar
efr
ee.I
’
m get
ti
ngdr
unkas
f
uckandf
eel
ssoooodammmn
goooood!
“
Youhadenoughnowl
et’
sgo”
“
Comeondon’
tbeagr
andpaLwenkosi
”
west
ayf
orhal
fanhourt
henl
eav
e.
“
Wuuuuuhhh”Iscr
eam causi
nghi
mto
l
augh
“
Youf
eel
goodneeeh”
“
Yeaht
hanky
ousomuchf
ort
his
wonder
ful
time”
“
It
’sal
way
smypl
easur
eDol
l
face”
“
Thewayy
ouar
edr
unk,
Idon’
tthi
nki
t’
s
wi
l
lbepossi
blef
ormet
ogety
oui
n
t
hrought
hatwi
ndowl
et’
sgohome.Iwi
l
l
dr
ivey
oui
nthemor
ningbef
oret
hey
wakeup”Wear
ri
veathi
shomeandhe
put
smeonhi
sbackt
henmakehi
sway
i
n.Ican’
tst
opgi
ggl
i
ngIdon’
tev
enknow
whatam Il
aughi
ngat
“
Shhhbabywedon’
twantt
owakeup
t
hef
olks”
“
Ohhh”Ipr
essaf
ingeronmyl
i
ps
Themomentwegeti
nhi
sbedr
oom he
put
smedownandhesmasheshi
sli
ps
onmi
ne.Ican’
thel
pbutr
espond.I
t’
sso
sweetandgent
lehescoopsmeupandI
wr
apmyl
egsar
oundhi
swai
stashe
makeshi
stot
hebedIpr
esume.He
gent
lyput
smeont
hebedandIf
eel
his
wei
ghtont
opofme.Thef
eel
ofhi
s
bul
geagai
nstmynuni
sfuel
i
ngt
he
bur
ningi
nfer
nobet
weenmyl
egs.Idon’
t
knowwhenandhowbutbot
husar
e
nakednow,
thef
eel
ofhi
sfl
eshagai
nst
mi
nei
sdr
ivi
ngmei
nsane.Heki
sseshi
s
wayt
omyneckdownt
omybr
east
“
OhhowImi
ssedt
heset
wins”Ist
if
lea
l
aughwhenIr
ememberhowconf
useI
waswhenheoncesai
dthat
,Iwasso
cl
uel
essy
ezwal
ol.Hesqueez
esmy
br
eastbef
oreki
ssi
ngmyr
ockhar
d
ni
ppl
esgent
ly,
Icanf
eel
them get
ti
ng
har
derandhar
derashel
i
ckandsuckon
t
hem.Mycunti
sfl
owi
ngIf
eel
li
keIwi
l
l
ex
plodebef
orehehasev
ent
ouchedme.
DamnLwenkosi
!Lor
dknowshowmuch
Imi
ssedt
his,
bei
ngv
ulner
abl
eunderhi
s
t
ouchandal
l
owhi
mtodowhathe
pl
easeswi
thmybodybecausehe
knowshowt
opl
easemybodyshame
j
eal
ousydown.I
t’
sli
kehewentt
o
school
tost
udyaboutmybody
.Hekeep
sucki
ngmyni
ppl
esappl
yi
ngmor
efor
ce
ashedr
awst
hesensi
ti
vef
leshi
ntohi
s
mout
h,moansar
esl
i
ppi
ngt
hroughmy
l
i
psi
nvol
unt
ari
l
y.Ashi
smout
hwor
kson
ni
ppl
e,f
li
cki
nghi
stongueati
thi
s
f
inger
sar
epi
nchi
ngandr
oll
i
ngt
heot
her
causi
ngwav
esofpl
easur
etowashov
er
me.If
eel
hisl
i
pssl
i
dingdownmybel
l
y
dr
awi
ngwetki
ssesandgent
lybi
tesunt
il
her
eachesmymound,
her
eleasea
bl
i
ssf
ulsi
gh.
“
Hel
l
oyoupapami
ssesy
ou”Hespanks
andsqueez
esmypussyt
ight
ly,
IswearI
al
mostr
elease.Hespr
eadmyl
egswi
de
andmybodypopsgoosebumpsasIf
eel
hi
swar
mthbr
eat
heonmycl
i
t
“
Ilov
eyourpussybaby
,especi
all
ythe
shapeofy
ourbi
gcl
i
t,pr
otr
udi
ngf
rom
y
ourf
olds”Hi
svoi
cei
sraspy
.Heki
sses
mypussysosweetandgent
let
heway
heki
ssesmyr
eal
li
ps,
hist
onguei
s
Fr
enchki
ssi
ngmywetf
oldssendi
ng
el
ect
ri
cspar
kov
ermywhol
ebody
.
“
Ohhbabyi
t’
ssogoodahhh”i
tssoo
goodbutIneedmor
eIwantmor
ehi
s
sl
owpacei
stor
tur
ingme.Hepushes
mykneesupt
omychestandIf
eel
my
j
uicesr
unni
ngdownmyass
“
Fuckl
etmecl
eant
hatupf
ory
ou”He
l
i
cksmef
rom myassupt
omycl
i
toh
godI
’
m goi
ngt
oex
plode.Hel
i
cksme
agai
nandagai
ndamnungenz
ani
l
omf
ana!Hegett
omybot
tom ofmy
cunthegent
lysl
i
dehi
stonguebet
ween
mywetf
oldsandl
i
cksmyi
nnerpussy
l
i
ps.Ial
mostcum i
nthati
nst
anty
eses!I
f
eel
hist
ongueopeni
ngmypussyand
sl
i
dei
ntomyachi
ngsl
i
t,t
ast
ingt
he
j
uicest
hatar
epour
ingf
rom i
nsi
deofme.
“
OhhhLwenkosi
li
kei
t!YesahhhhIl
ove
t
hewayy
oueatme…y
es,
eatmebaby
,
ohhhgod”Icl
enchont
hecov
ersasI
f
eel
hist
onguemov
ingar
oundmy
cr
otchpr
obi
ngmydept
hsasf
arashe
coul
d.I
’
m amoani
ngmessandatt
his
momentIdon’
tcar
ewhocanhearus.I
f
eel
hist
onguef
li
cki
ngov
ermybud
damnl
omf
anawenz
aamasi
mbaodwa!
Heeatmypussyl
i
keI
’
m hi
slastmeal
andIbuckmyhi
psr
idi
nghi
stongue,
I’
m
r
ightont
heedge
“
Lweeeeeahhh”mywhol
ebody
conv
ulseswi
thpl
easur
easIex
plodemy
j
uicesi
nhi
smout
h.Heki
sshi
swayup
t
omyl
i
psohhowIl
ovet
het
ast
eand
smel
lofmyj
uicesi
nhi
smout
h.If
eel
his
cockr
ubbi
ngonmyent
rance
“
Condom baby
”Imur
muragai
nsthi
s
l
i
ps.Imaybedr
unkwi
thal
cohol
and
sex
ual
pleasur
ebutmymi
ndi
sst
il
l
wor
kingper
fect
ly.Hest
ret
chesov
erand
Iheart
hedr
aweropeni
ngt
hencl
osi
ng.
Hegetupf
rom meabi
ttoweara
condom ofcour
set
henhepul
l
smyl
eg
onhi
sshoul
derandpushesi
nhi
scock
i
ntomeIf
eel
itdi
sappear
ingi
nchby
i
nchunt
ili
tsdeepi
ntomywomband
gasp.
“
JesuwaseNaz
aret
h!”Hegr
oansandI
t
houghthewi
l
lst
artmov
ingbutno
“
Lwenkosi
mov
e”
”
ImababykancaneI
’
m goi
ngt
ocum
damny
ouar
esohooot
!”Iwai
tforhi
m
f
orf
ewsecondst
henhest
art
srol
l
ing
hi
shi
pssl
owl
ybui
l
dinguphi
sspeed.
“
Ahhhbaby
!!
”
“
Babyy
ouar
esol
oud!
”
“
Ican’
thel
pitst
handwasami
youar
e
sooogoodahh”
“
Imi
ssedy
ousomuchmydol
l
faceahhh
f
uck!
!”Heki
ssesmyl
egt
hati
sonhi
s
shoul
derIf
eel
shi
ver
sthr
oughoutmy
body
.
“
AhhhImi
ssedy
out
oocuddl
ecakes
wami
!uhhh”Icanf
eel
him deepi
t’
sso
pai
nful
l
ygood.Imov
emyhi
psi
n
sy
nchr
oni
zat
ionwi
thhi
sdeepandf
ast
t
hrust
s.Hewast
heonewho
compl
aini
ngaboutmebei
ngl
oudbut
nowIcanheart
hathehasl
osthi
msel
f
al
lIcanhearhi
ssex
iestgr
oansal
ong
myscr
eams.Hef
li
psusov
erIhav
e
nev
erbeenont
opbef
oreI
’
m notev
en
sur
ewhatt
odobutIf
oll
owhi
sgui
de
andr
oll
myhi
ps.
“
Demedi
baby
!Ohhhf
uck!
”If
eel
his
f
inger
snudgi
ngonmycl
i
tasIr
idehi
s
di
ck.
“
Ahhhshi
ttohmyl
ord!Fuck!
”Hi
s
gr
oansar
eur
gingmeon,
Ipul
lanI
ndi
an
bel
l
ydance,
itdr
iveshi
m cr
azy
“
Woooshi
tt
ttf
uck!Wher
ethef
uckdi
d
y
oul
ear
nthat
!!
”Het
ight
enhi
sgr
ipon
mywai
stt
hatIf
eel
hisnai
l
sdi
ggi
ngon
myski
n.Imov
emywai
sti
nli
keI
’
m
pl
ayi
ngwhool
a-hoopsi
nast
eady
mot
ion.
“
Fuck!Fuck!Fuck!Fuck!YesesMi
raaa!I
l
ovey
ouy
ou!ngi
yakut
handaMi
ra
wami
i
ii!Mar
rymeohshi
tt
!Mar
ryme
Mi
ra!
”Ourscr
eamsofpl
easur
ear
e
echoi
ngi
nhi
sbedr
oom,
Iswearhi
s
par
ent
scanhearus.Ir
oll
overpant
ing
anddr
enchedwi
thsweathepul
l
smeup
t
omyf
eetandr
aisemyonel
egand
wr
apsi
tar
oundhi
sbut
tockst
hen
makeshi
swayi
nwi
thonepush.I
scr
eam andhol
dhi
mti
ght
ly,
hest
art
s
mov
ingi
nandoutofmebui
l
dingupt
he
pl
easur
e.
“
Ohhhbabykumnandi
!Yessohhmy
!”
“
Yourpussyi
smi
neDol
l
faceIdon’
t
wannaseey
ouev
ershar
ingi
tagai
n!”
“
Ngekengi
phi
ndest
handwasam”He
poundsmehar
dermyl
egcan’
tkeepup.
Isweart
hisguyi
stear
ingmeapar
t.
“
It
’smypussydol
l
facemi
neal
one!
!”
“
Yessbabyey
akhoy
onkeee”Icanf
eel
hi
sbal
l
shi
tt
ingmeashepumpshar
d
i
ntome
“
YhoooLwenkosi
youar
eki
l
li
ngme
ahhh!Ihav
enot
hingonmynamebutI
pr
omi
sey
ouIwi
l
lbui
l
dat
uckshopf
or
y
ou”Damnhe’
swayt
oogoodIcanf
eel
oursoul
sar
econnect
ingi
nadeepl
evel
.
Icanf
eel
hisl
ovet
hrustbyt
hrustand
t
hewayhe’
shol
dingme,
touchi
ngme,
f
ucki
ngme,
kissi
ngme,
it’
smi
nd
bl
owi
ng.IswearI
’
m onmi
racl
esea
pl
anet
,wher
eonl
yIandhi
m ex
ist
.It
t
akeshi
m aboutt
enst
rokesandIf
eel
hi
smuscl
esont
hebackf
lex
ingandhe
r
oar
sli
keawoundeddogasher
each
hi
shi
ght
aki
ngmewi
thhi
m.We
conv
ulsei
neachot
herar
mspant
ingand
sweat
ing.
“
Damn!
”Hepul
l
soutandcar
rymet
hen
pl
acesmeont
hebed.Ihearhi
m
wal
ki
ngawayt
hencomebackandwi
pe
mewi
thawar
mtowel
.Hesl
i
psnex
tto
meandpul
l
smet
ohi
schest
.Icanhear
hi
shear
tthuddi
ng.
“
DamnbabyIdi
dn’
tknowy
oucanmov
e
l
i
ket
hat
”!Igi
ggl
e
“
It
’sanI
ndi
anbel
l
ydance”
“
wher
edi
dyoul
ear
nthatshi
tyoooi
t
wasmi
ndbl
owi
ng”
“
Atschool
wewer
etaughtal
otoft
hings
t
her
e.Ourt
ypeofl
ear
ningwasn’
tbased
onbooksonl
y”Tot
hinkIuset
hinki
t’
s
r
idi
cul
ousbutl
ooknowi
tscomi
ng
handy
.
“
WowIl
ovei
t”Wef
all
int
ocomf
ort
abl
e
si
l
encef
oramoment
.
“
Mar
rymeMi
raIwasser
iouswhenI
sai
dmar
ryme”
HappyBi
rt
hdaySeset
huJombi
l
e

CHAPTER48(
unedi
ted)

“
Wakeywakey
!Dr
agonGr
anny
!”God
t
hischi
l
dwhyi
sshescr
eami
ng!Ibl
i
nk
myey
esopen,
readyt
oscol
dherbuther
beaut
if
ulwi
l
dsmi
l
emel
tsmyhear
t.
“
Mor
ningdr
ogongr
anny
”shesay
ssof
tl
y
“
Mor
ningcupcakehowar
eyou”
“
I’
m goodandy
ou”
“
I’
m al
sogoodwhyar
eyouupsoear
ly”
“
It
’snotear
lyt
imei
s”sheshowsmeher
t
iny4f
inger
s.Igi
ggl
eandst
ret
chov
er
t
ocheckt
het
imeonmyphone.I
t’
s6
o’
cl
ocki
nthemor
ningandt
hischi
l
dis
awakeal
ready
.
“
It
’ssi
xo’
cl
ocknowl
et’
ssl
eepf
oran
hour
”Ican’
tbel
i
eveI
’
m st
il
lex
haust
ed
becauseoft
hatsex
athonGodI
’
m
get
ti
ngol
d.I
fsexal
onei
sti
ri
ngmel
i
ke
t
hishowmuchmor
eIwoul
dIbei
fI
wer
etof
all
pregnantnoI
’
mfi
net
hank
y
ou.Ij
ustwantt
ohav
etwohour
ssl
eep
bef
oreIl
eav
eformyAAmeet
ing.
“
I’
m notsl
eepygr
anny
”shebashesher
ey
elashesandpur
sehersmal
ll
ips
l
ooki
ngcut
e.Mydaught
erhasst
rong
genesI
mtel
l
ingy
ouandt
othi
nkshe
l
ooksex
act
lyl
i
ket
hemanIcal
lmy
f
atheri
t’
sir
kst
hehel
loutofme.Outof
al
lpeopl
eshehadt
olookl
i
kemydad
t
alki
ngaboutat
rai
tor
.
“
Okayl
et’
sgetupkeh”Ir
oll
outofbed
asshedoest
hesameandmaket
hebed.
Shei
nsi
stonhel
pingmeshe’
sso
ador
abl
ebutIswearI
twi
l
ltakemet
he
whol
edayt
ofi
nishmaki
ngt
hisbed.
JustwhenIt
hinkIhav
est
rengt
hened
t
hecov
ersshepul
l
sthem l
ord!OnceI
f
ini
shIpi
ckherupandmakemywayt
o
t
hebat
hroom.Iwashherf
aceandbr
ush
hert
eet
hbef
orewashi
ngmi
ne.Ichange
herpj
saswel
lasmi
net
henwewehead
t
otheki
tchent
omakebr
eakf
ast
.Inev
er
t
houghtIcanbeagr
andmot
hersosoon
butIwoul
dn’
ttr
adet
hismomentwi
th
mygr
anddaught
erf
ort
hewor
ldIal
ready
l
ostal
most4y
ear
sofherl
i
fe.
“
Kukhut
hel
eokuwuKami
na”Mom say
s
asshewal
ksi
nst
il
lwear
inghergown
“
Shet
ookaf
terhergr
annyofcour
se,
Mi
rai
slaz
y”
“
Mir
aisnotl
azyy
ouspoi
l
edherNono”
she’
sri
ghtIl
ovemydaught
ert
oomuch
somehowIdi
dn’
tnot
iceIwasspoi
l
ing
herbutIt
aughtherchor
esand
ev
ery
thi
ng.Theonl
ythi
ngshedoesn’
t
knowhowt
odoi
slaundr
ybecauseI
pr
eferdoi
ngl
aundr
ybymy
sel
fIdon’
t
hav
eawashi
ngmachi
ne.May
beI
t’
s
t
imeIbuyawashi
ngmachi
nesot
hat
shecanl
ear
ntodoherl
aundr
yaswel
l
asKamar
ia’
s.Il
i
kedoi
ngt
hingsf
ormy
daught
erIr
eal
l
ydoi
t’
smakesmehappy
butIknowt
hatshehast
oknowhowt
o
dot
hingsi
ndependent
lyespeci
all
ynow
t
hatshe’
samot
her
.Shehasadaught
er
t
hatsheneedst
otakecar
eofandI
don’
tdoubthercapabi
l
iti
es.Cabadi
da
r
eal
l
ygoodj
obi
nrai
singKamar
iaandI
wi
l
lfor
everbegr
atef
ulbutnowIt
hink
i
t’
sti
meMi
rast
epupasKamar
ia’
smom.
“
Kwaz
iseuz
iny
obul
alawami
”
“
It
’snotr
ightNono”
“
Arey
oudoubt
ingmypar
ent
ingski
l
ls
now?
”
“
NoIwasj
ustsay
ingIdon’
tmeant
o
of
fendy
ou”
“
Mom Mi
raknowshowt
odochor
esy
es
Imi
ghthav
espoi
l
edherbutIt
aughther
ev
ery
thi
ngev
enatherschool
theydi
d.
That
’st
her
easonwhyt
hese
handi
cappedschool
sar
eex
pensi
ve
becauset
hei
rty
peofl
ear
ningi
snot
basedonacademi
csonl
ybutal
sohow
t
oli
vewi
thdi
sabi
l
ity,
howt
opl
ay
spor
ts,
howt
odocul
tur
alact
ivi
ti
eset
c.”
“
Ohbabynowt
haty
ousayi
tIcansee
becausey
est
erdayshemadebr
eakf
ast
f
orusandhonest
lyIwasscar
edoff
ood
poi
soni
ngbutshesur
pri
sedme.The
f
oodwasamaz
ingt
her
ewasnot
oo
muchofsal
tnort
oomuchoi
lev
ery
thi
ng
wasj
ustper
fectIwasi
nawe”
“
Yousee”
“
Yeskodaphel
ashedoesn’
thav
etobe
uz
iny
obul
ala”
“
Whatdoy
oumean?
”
“I
’
m sur
eshewoul
dbehappyi
fshecan
hav
eal
i
ttl
ebr
otherorsi
ster
.”Il
augh
“
Don’
ttel
lmey
ouwantmet
ohav
ea
baby
”
“
What
’swr
ongwi
tht
hat
?”
“
Hai
bomamaI
’
m wayt
oool
d!”
“
Vel
eabant
wanabat
hol
waabant
u
abadal
aNono.Youar
etheonest
hat
ar
emi
sleadi
ngoury
out
h.Sex
,
pr
egnancyandmar
ri
agewasmeantf
or
adul
tnotki
ds.Mi
nal
ent
oesi
yenz
ekal
a
kul
esi
khat
hisamanj
eay
ingi
yaz
iibi
zwa
si
l
wanebani
”
“
Timechangesmom wear
enotl
i
vingi
n
t
hesi
xti
esany
mor
e.I
fyouar
eabov
e40
andf
all
pregnanty
ouar
emadej
oke.I
t
howi
tist
her
e’snot
hingwecando
aboutt
hatandI
’
m happywi
thmyonl
y
daught
er.May
bet
hemi
scar
ri
ageswer
e
t
hesi
gnt
hatI
’
m notmeantt
ohav
eot
her
chi
l
drenex
ceptMi
ra”It
akeoutt
he
sausagesi
nthemi
crowav
eanddi
sh
t
hem uponourpl
ates.
“
Buty
ouandIknowwhyy
ouhadt
hose
mi
scar
ri
agesNono.I
t’
snotni
cebei
ng
t
heonl
ychi
l
dyazMi
rawi
l
lneed
someonewhowi
l
lhav
eherback.Look
howbeaut
if
ulZoandKhuz
ani
’
s
r
elat
ionshi
pis.Babambaneandy
ou
woul
dn’
tev
ent
ell
thatt
heydon’
thav
e
t
hesamemot
her
.Sucht
endst
oaf
fect
t
hechi
l
dren’
srel
ati
onshi
paswel
l
.You
andy
oursi
ster
sdon’
tli
key
ourf
ather
’s
chi
l
drenwhi
chi
swr
ongbecauseatt
he
endoft
hedayt
heyar
eyoursi
bli
ngs.
Whathappenedbet
weent
hepar
ent
s
hasnot
hingt
odowi
thy
ou.
”
“
Youar
ecompar
ingt
wodi
ff
erentt
hings
mom.Zo’
sfat
herl
ovedKhuz
ani
andZo
equal
l
y.Henev
erf
avor
edZobecausehe
endedupwi
thhermom orf
avor
edK
becausehe’
syoungorwhat
everr
eason.
Hegav
ehi
schi
l
drenequal
lov
ether
e
wasnor
easonf
ort
hem t
ofi
ght
.Si
bli
ngs
r
ival
ryi
scausedbyourpar
ent
s.Dadi
s
t
heonet
hatmadeushat
ehi
schi
l
dren,
het
ookcar
eoft
hem whi
l
ewewer
e
suf
fer
ing”shet
akesi
nahugebr
eat
h.I
knowshedoesn’
tli
ket
hisf
eudbet
ween
dadandIbuti
tiswhati
tis.
“
Sowhati
fKhuz
ani
wantachi
l
dImean
t
hepoormanhasadaught
eronl
yI’
m
sur
ehewantason”
“
HedoesbutIt
oldhi
m nowehav
e
chi
l
dren,
twodaught
erswhatmor
edoes
hewant
.”
“
Asont
hatwi
l
lgr
owt
heMsi
mango
cl
an”
“
Way
ehl
elel
eni
engamt
hol
isonke
l
esi
khat
himudal
alomunt
u”(
whatwas
hewai
ti
ngf
oral
lthi
sti
mehe’
swayt
oo
ol
d)
“
Hewaswai
ti
ngf
ort
her
ightwomant
o
bearhi
m ason.I
ndodai
yambheka
umunt
uef
unaukumenz
aumama
wabant
wanabay
o.Yout
hinkal
lthi
s
t
imehewaswai
ti
ngt
omeety
ou?Nohe
hasmetandf
uckedpl
ent
yofwomen
outt
her
ebutwhenhef
inal
l
ygot
oyou
heknewt
haty
ouar
ehi
slastst
op.
”She
gotapoi
ntandmuchasIknowt
hatI
’
m
nott
heonl
ywomanhehasbeenwi
thi
n
hi
sli
febutt
het
houghtofhi
m wi
th
anot
herwomanmakesmedi
zzy
.Idi
dn’
t
r
eal
i
zeIhav
efal
l
ent
hishar
dforhi
m oh
mydearGodpl
easepr
otectmyhear
t.
“
Iheary
oumom buthedoesn’
thav
ea
pr
obl
em wi
tht
hef
actt
hatIwon’
tgi
ve
hi
m achi
l
ddon’
twor
ry”OnceIf
ini
sh
maki
ngbr
eakf
astIgot
owakeupMi
raI
knowhowshehat
esi
twhenIdon’
t
knockbutIhav
ebeenknocki
ngf
ora
whi
l
enowandt
her
e’snor
espond.I
pusht
hedooropenRockyi
sly
ingonher
bedbutMi
rai
snott
her
e.
“
Mir
a!”IshoutasImakemywayt
othe
bat
hroom andst
il
lIdon’
tfi
ndher
.I’
m
pani
cki
ngr
ightnowwher
ecoul
dshebe
andherphonei
sont
hepedest
al.
“
Wher
e’sshe?
”Rockybar
ksl
ooki
ngat
t
hewi
ndowandImakemywayt
othe
wi
ndowandf
indi
t’
sopen.Mi
rawoul
d
nev
erbeabl
etoj
umpt
hrought
he
wi
ndowal
oneunl
esssomeone.
..
No!I
r
unt
omamascr
eami
ngmyl
ungsout
“
Yini
?”(
What
?)
“
Mir
amama.
..
she’
sgone”
“
Whatdoy
oumeanshe’
sgone?
”
“
She’
snoti
nherr
oom mom andIt
hink
i
t’
sKhany
iwhot
ookher
”I’
m cr
ying
hy
ster
ical
l
y
“
Youneedt
ocal
m downNono”
“
Cal
m downhowwhent
hatl
unat
ichas
mydaught
er!She.
..
she.
..
shewi
l
lhur
ther
mom t
omakemepay
”
“
Gogowhat
’sgoi
ngonwher
e’s
mommy
?”Kamar
iaaskswi
thasof
t
v
oice.GodhowdoIanswert
hatIj
ogt
o
mybedr
oom t
otakemyphoneandcal
l
K.
“
Myj
aan”Ibur
sti
ntoal
oudsob
“
Snookums!What
’sgoi
ngon”
“
Mir
aisgoneK”Isaybet
weenmysobs
“
Usho.
.ushoni
l
e?”
“
No!Khanyt
ookherK”
“
Ohshi
t!I
’
m comi
ngpl
easecal
m down”
Isi
nkont
hebedandcr
y.IhopeKhany
i
doesn’
thur
tmydaught
er.I
’
mtheone
whoputhert
hroughpai
nnotmy
daught
er,
she’
sinnocenti
nal
loft
his.
“
Dontcr
ybaby
..
.hav
eyoucal
l
ed
Khuz
ani
”Inodwi
thmyheadshehel
ps
meupandwemakeourwayt
othe
l
i
vingr
oom.Weset
tl
edownont
he
couchandshecomf
ort
sme
“
Wher
eismommy
?Whyar
eyoucr
ying
gogo?
”
“
Comeher
e”Ipul
lhert
omyl
ap
“
Mommyi
scomi
ngokay
”Weheara
buz
zerandmom getupt
oat
tendi
t.The
smel
lofhi
sscenthi
tmynost
ri
lsbef
ore
shemakeshi
swayi
n.
“
Snookums”
“
K”Igetupwi
thKamar
iaandt
hrowus
onhi
sar
msheenv
elopsus.
“
Shhhdon’
tcr
yIwi
l
lfi
ndher
”
“
Whati
fsheal
readyki
l
ledherwhati
f…”
“
Heyheyst
opt
hinki
ngnegat
ivewehav
e
t
obeposi
ti
venowokay
”Inodwi
thmy
headhewi
pesmyt
ear
sandki
ssesmy
f
orehead.
“
Comesi
tdownandt
ell
mewhat
happened”wesi
tdownandIt
ell
him
whathappened.
“
Kpl
easef
indmydaught
erbef
orei
t’
s
t
ool
ateI
..
Ican’
tloseher
”Ihearmy
mom scr
eami
ngi
ntheki
tchenweget
upandr
ushher
.
“
Mom what
…”IseeMi
raandLwandl
e
hol
dinghands,she’
ssmel
l
ingal
cohol
andshel
ookst
ir
ed.Mybl
oodboi
l
ssoI
waswor
ri
edf
orsomeonewhowas
hav
ingf
unwher
evershewas
“
Mommy
!”Kamar
iawi
ggl
esher
sel
fin
myar
msandr
unt
ohermom who
scoopsherupandki
ssesherf
ace.
“
Wher
ear
eyoucomi
ngf
roMi
ra?Doy
ou
knowhowwor
ri
edIwas!
”
“
I’
m sor
rymamaIdi
dn’
tmeant
owor
ry
y
ouI
’
m okayasy
oucansee”
“
Youar
ereeki
ngofal
cohol
!!
!”
“
Pleasedon’
tscr
eam Ihav
eat
err
ibl
e
headache”
“
Wher
ear
eyoucomi
ngf
rom andwho
t
hef
uckgav
eyout
heper
missi
ont
ogo!
”
“
Mom j
ustchi
l
lI’
m okay
”
“
Chi
l
ldon’
tyoudar
euset
hatwor
dto
me!
!Whati
fsomet
hinghappenedt
o
y
ou!
!”
“
Youar
etheonewhoputMi
raupt
othi
s
Lwandl
e!Whatt
hef
ucki
swr
ongwi
th
y
ou!Howmanyt
imesdoIhav
etot
ell
to
st
ayawayf
rom Mi
ra?
”Kr
oar
sinanger
“
Iwant
edt
ogouncl
eKwi
l
ly’
al
lrel
ax…”
“
ShutupI
’
m nott
alki
ngt
oyouMi
ra!
Wenawoz
aI’
mfedupwi
thy
ounow!
”He
char
gesf
orLwandl
eandpi
nshi
mto
agai
nstt
hewal
l
“
Kst
opi
t!
”Mom t
akesKamar
iaf
rom
Mi
raandwal
ksawaywi
thher
.
“
Itol
dyouIwon’
tst
ayawayf
rom Mi
raI
l
oveherki
l
lmekei
fIhav
etodi
efort
he
l
oveIhav
eforhersobei
t.
!”Khuz
ani
hit
Lwandl
ewi
thhi
sheadandIseebl
ood
r
ushi
ngdownLwandl
e’
snosewho
gr
oansi
nagonywhi
chal
ert
sMi
ra
“
Lwenkosi
”cr
iesMi
ra
“
Khuz
ani
cal
m downpl
ease”
“
Uyi
ndodaLwandl
eangi
thi
showme
t
haty
ouar
etheman!
”
“
Khuz
ani
maanst
opt
his”Ipul
lhi
m away
buthe’
stoost
rong
“
Bongast
ayoutoft
his!
”
“
PleaseThabz
olol
ett
hechi
l
dgo”He
l
ooksatmeandl
et’
sgoofhi
m.
“
Arey
ouokayLwenkosi
”
“
YesI
’
m okaymydol
l
face”hewi
pes
bl
oodonhi
snosewi
thhi
shand
“
Getoutofher
eifIseey
ouwi
thMi
ra
agai
nIwi
l
lki
l
lyoudoy
ouhearme!
”
“
Am Inott
heonewhoshoul
dtel
lhi
mto
st
ayawayf
rom mei
fIwanthi
mto?
Lwandl
elwenkosi
didn’
tdoany
thi
ng
wr
ongIwant
edt
ogot
othecl
ubwi
th
hi
m at
tacki
nghi
missowr
ong.I
’
m sor
ry
mom t
haty
ougotwor
ri
edf
ornot
hing
v
eley
ouwoul
dn’
thav
eal
l
owedmet
ogo
especi
all
ywi
thLwenkosi
.Ij
ustwant
ed
t
oloosenupnami
andhav
efunl
i
ke
ot
herki
dsmyageIdi
dn’
tknowi
twoul
d
causesomuchdr
ama”
“
Idon’
twantLwandl
eneary
ouhehasa
gi
rl
fr
iendMi
ra!
”Ksay
s
“
Youar
emymot
her
’sboy
fri
endnotmy
f
atherst
ayi
nyourl
anepl
ease!
”
“
Mir
ashowsomer
espect
!”
“
Hay
imamaI
’
m notgoi
ngt
opr
etendt
o
behappyt
haty
out
woar
enowdat
ing
whi
l
ehe’
stheonet
hatbr
oughtpai
nin
ourl
i
ves.Hepr
etendedt
ocar
ekant
ihe
wasusi
ngmet
oav
engehi
sbabymama.
Al
lheev
erseeni
nmei
sapawnnot
hing
mor
esot
ell
mewhywoul
dIr
especta
manwhousev
ulner
abl
egi
rl
stof
ighthi
s
bat
tl
es?Ispent4y
ear
sinaf
orei
gn
count
rysi
nki
ngi
ndepr
essi
onbecause
ofhi
m”
“
Buthef
oundy
oubabyandhe’
sver
y
r
emor
sef
ul”
“
Hehadt
ofi
ndmei
tshi
sfaul
tI
di
sappear
ed”
“
Mir
apl
ease….
”
“
It
’sokayBongaIwi
l
lleav
e.Wena
asambe”(
Let
’sgo)Ksay
s
“
Ufi
kenami
yini
?”(
Didy
oucomewi
th
me)Lwandl
esay
sasher
ushesoutand
Kr
unsaf
terhi
m.Ohl
ord!

“
Hav
eyouev
erl
ovedsomebodyso
much
I
tmakesy
oucr
y
Hav
eyouev
erneededsomet
hingsobad
Youcan'
tsl
eepatni
ght
Hav
eyouev
ert
ri
edt
ofi
ndt
hewor
ds
Butt
heydon'
tcomeoutr
ight
Hav
eyouev
er,
hav
eyouev
er

Hav
eyouev
erf
oundt
heone
You'
vedr
eamedofal
lofy
ourl
i
fe
You'
ddoj
ustaboutany
thi
ngt
olooki
nto
t
hei
rey
es
Hav
eyouf
inal
l
yfoundt
heoney
ou'
ve
gi
veny
ourhear
tto
Onl
ytof
indt
hatonewon'
tgi
vet
hei
r
hear
ttoy
ou
Hav
eyouev
ercl
osedy
ourey
esand
Dr
eamedt
hatt
heywer
ether
e
Andal
lyoucandoi
swai
tfort
heday
whent
heywi
l
lcar
e

Hav
eyouev
erl
ovedsomebodysomuch
I
tmakesy
oucr
y
Hav
eyouev
erneededsomet
hingsobad
Youcan'
tsl
eepatni
ght
Hav
eyouev
ert
ri
edt
ofi
ndt
hewor
ds
Butt
heydon'
tcomeoutr
ight
Hav
eyouev
er,
hav
eyouev
er

WhatdoIgot
tadot
ogety
oui
nmyar
ms
baby
WhatdoIgot
tasayt
ogett
oyourhear
t
Tomakey
ouunder
standhowIneedy
ou
nex
ttome
Got
tagety
oui
nmywor
ld
'
CuzbabyIcan'
tsl
eep”

Ican’
tst
opt
ear
smyt
ear
sfr
om f
all
i
ng
t
hishear
tbr
eaki
swor
set
hent
hel
ast
one.I
’
m bey
ondshat
ter
edIwi
sht
his
pai
ncanst
opal
ready
.It
’st
oomuchI
can’
thandl
eit
.If
eel
someoner
emov
ing
myheadset
sfr
om myear
sandIopen
myey
es.I
t’
smom she’
swor
ri
edandI
under
standbecauseev
ersi
nceIcame
homeIhav
en’
ttol
dherwhat
’s
happeni
ng.
“
Baby
”
“
Mom I
’
mfi
ne”Isaywi
pingmyt
ear
s
wi
tht
hebackofmyhandsandsi
tonmy
but
t.
“
Youdon’
thav
etoactt
oughAy
aIknow
y
ouar
ehur
ti
ng”
“
It
’shur
tmamaIdon’
twantt
ofeel
thi
s
pai
nnomor
epl
easet
akei
taway
”Isob
“
Ohmypoorbaby
”If
eel
li
kemyhear
t
hasbeenr
ippedoutf
rom mychest
.She
pul
l
smet
oherbosom andhol
dsme
t
ight
ly.Il
eti
tal
lout
,af
terseei
ngt
hat
pi
ctur
eIdeci
dedt
ocomehome.I
neededt
obeawayf
rom t
hatpl
ace.I
neededt
obei
nmymom’
sar
ms.
“
Shhhhdontcr
ymychi
l
dit
’sgoi
ngt
obe
okay
”
“
Howcoul
dhedot
hismama?Howam I
ev
engoi
ngt
ofacet
hewor
ldaf
tert
his.
”
Dat
ingacel
ebr
it
yisdi
ff
icul
tbecause
y
oudon’
thav
epr
ivacy
.Mybusi
nessi
s
al
lov
ert
hesoci
alnet
wor
kandI
’
m sur
e
myenemi
esar
erej
oici
ngatmyhear
t
br
eak.
“
Whatr
eal
l
yhappenedbaby
”Iex
plai
nto
herwhathappened
“
Whatdi
dhesayaboutt
his?
”
“
Whatdi
ff
erencei
twoul
dhav
emade
mom”
“
Soy
ouar
etel
l
ingmet
haty
oubel
i
eve
whaty
ousaw i
nthesesoci
alnet
wor
ks
ofy
our
swi
thouthear
inghi
ssi
deoft
he
st
ory
?”
“
Sot
hathewi
l
lli
etome?
”
“
Thi
sboyi
shandsomeandacel
ebr
it
y
I
’
m sur
eev
erygi
rlwi
l
ldoany
thi
ngt
oget
api
eceofhi
myoucan’
tbel
i
eve
ev
ery
thi
ngy
ouseei
nthesesoci
al
net
wor
ks.Whati
fthi
sgi
rli
stheonet
hat
post
edt
hatpi
cbecauseshewant
Lwandl
eback?
”Shehasapoi
ntbut
Lwandl
eshoul
dhav
etol
dmet
heyhav
e
achi
l
dtoget
her
“
Butwhyhedi
dn’
ttel
lmet
heyhav
ea
daught
ermom”
“
HowAy
anday
ounev
ergav
ehi
ma
chancet
oex
plai
n.Thepoorboydr
ove
al
lthewayf
rom Dur
bant
oseey
oubut
whatdi
dyoudo?Youdi
dn’
tcomeout,
washi
swai
l
angaumf
anawabant
uwaz
e
waci
shawal
uny
wai
zi
nja.I
fher
eal
l
y
doesn’
tlov
eyouhewoul
dn’
thav
e
bot
her
edt
ocomeher
eAy
anda”okayI
admi
tIwast
oohar
shIshoul
dhav
e
cameoutandhearhi
m out
.
“
Iwasangr
ymama”
“
Ify
ouwanty
ourr
elat
ionshi
ptowor
k
y
oushoul
dputy
ourangerasi
deand
handl
ethesi
tuat
ioncal
mly
.”
“
Iheary
oumamabutIdoubtIwi
l
lev
er
wi
ntheyhav
eachi
l
dtoget
her
”
“
Theymi
ghthav
eachi
l
dtoget
herbut
whent
her
e’snol
oveany
mor
ether
e’s
not
hingt
heycando.Iknowt
hebaby
mamadr
amai
stoomuchbuti
fhel
oves
y
oubabyy
ouwon’
thav
etof
ightf
ory
our
pl
acei
nhi
sli
featt
hesamet
imey
ou
can’
tjustgi
veupony
ourl
ove.Thi
slov
e
t
hingi
scompl
i
cat
edy
ouneedt
obe
st
rongespeci
all
yemot
ional
l
y”Iheav
ea
si
gh
“
Doy
oul
ovehi
m?”
“
Wit
hev
eryf
iberi
nmybody
”
“
Thendon’
tgi
veuponhi
m.Hearmeout
andt
akei
tfr
om t
her
e.”
“
Thanky
ousomuchmom.Il
ovey
ou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oobabyandpl
easet
ryt
o
keepi
ttoget
hery
ourf
atheri
saski
ng
quest
ionsandt
hel
astt
hingwewanti
s
hi
mfi
ndi
ngoutt
hathi
sbabygi
rli
s
dat
ing”Inod.
Mydadi
sver
ypr
otect
iveofmeI
’
mthe
onl
ygi
rlaf
teral
landt
heot
hert
woar
e
boy
sIfhecanf
indoutt
hatI
m dat
ingl
et
al
oneI
’
m nol
ongerav
irgi
nhel
lwi
l
l
br
eakl
ose.It
houghtmyexboy
fri
endi
s
t
heonl
yguyIhav
eev
erl
ovedunt
ilImet
Lwandl
eandr
eal
i
zedt
hatwhatIt
hought
If
eltf
ormyexboy
fri
endi
snot
hing
compar
edt
owhatIf
eel
forLwandl
e.I
l
oveLwandl
elwenkosi
Nkosi
he’
stheai
r
t
hatIbr
eat
heIi
nvest
edsomuchi
nthi
s
r
elat
ionshi
ptoj
ustl
eti
tgol
i
ket
hat
mom i
sri
ght
.
“
Ayanda!
!!
”OhIknowt
hatscr
eam he’
s
angr
y.mom andIl
ookateachot
her
“
Baba!
”Thedoorbur
stopenIl
ookupat
hi
m.He’
sbr
eat
hingf
ir
e.
“
Pleaset
ell
mewhatIhear
dthaty
ouar
e
dat
ingt
hatboywhopl
aysi
nisf
ungoi
s
nott
rue?
”Ohno!
“
Uhm.
..
I.
..
I!
”
“
Uhm what
!Youst
utt
ernow!
!”He
shr
iekswi
thangercausi
ngmet
ojump.I
l
ookatmom wi
thpl
eadi
ngey
es
“
Nguboy
engwecal
m downpl
ease”He
l
ooksatmom asi
fhe’
sst
udy
ingher
“
Youknewaboutt
hisi
sn’
t”
“
Honey
…”
“
YouknewNt
ombi
aboutt
hisandy
ou
nev
ersai
dany
thi
ng!
”
“
Dar
li
ngIcanex
plai
n…”
“
Expl
ainwhatNt
ombthuh!Youwat
ched
mepl
anni
ngumemul
oforherwhi
l
eyou
knewt
hatshe’
shasaboy
fri
end!
”Huh
umemul
owhyIwasn’
ttol
daboutt
hat
?
“
Ayandai
sst
il
lav
irgi
nthememul
ocan
st
il
lgoonr
ightAy
anda?
”Il
ookdown
goshhowdoIt
ell
them t
hat
’sI
’
m no
l
ongerav
irgi
n.
-

Myheadi
sachi
ngandmyey
esar
e
heav
ysomeonei
sbr
ushi
ngadamp
cl
othonmyf
orehead.Ibl
i
nkmyey
es
opent
otel
lyouI
’
m sur
pri
sedt
oseehi
m
woul
dbeanunder
stat
ement
.Il
ookat
mysur
roundi
ngsI
’
m notf
ami
l
iarwi
th
t
hishouse.I
’
mly
ingonabedi
nahuge
bedr
oom.Howdi
dIgether
e?It
ryt
o
r
ememberwhatmi
ghthav
ehappened
butI
’
m unabl
etor
emember
.
“
Wher
e..
am Iandwher
e’smyson”
“
Shhhy
oursoni
ssaf
eyouar
esaf
e.”He
say
sst
il
lbr
ushi
ngmyf
oreheadwi
tha
dampcl
oth.
“
Whatdoy
ouwantf
rom meSpi
der
”
“
Youar
esaf
enowKhany
iI’
m goi
ngt
o
t
akecar
eofy
ouandt
hel
i
ttl
eboy
.Don’
t
wor
ryabouthi
m he’
ssl
eepi
ng”
“
Pleasedon’
thur
tmysonI
’
m beggi
ng
y
ou”
”
Iwi
l
lnev
erhur
tmysonwhatdoy
ou
t
akemef
or?
”
“
Yourson?
”
“
Vusi
wasl
i
keabr
othert
omet
ome
whi
chmakeshi
ssonmi
ne.Ipr
omi
seI
wi
l
ltakecar
eoft
hebot
hofy
ounow.Al
l
t
hepai
nyouguy
ssuf
fer
edi
snomor
e
I
m her
eokay
”I’
m notsur
eift
hisi
sa
t
raporwhatbutheseemssi
ncer
e.The
pastf
oury
ear
shav
ebeenoneoft
he
hor
ri
bley
ear
sofmyl
i
fe.Il
ostmyj
ob
andev
ery
thi
ngIowned,
Spi
j
oms
t
hreat
enedt
otakesomei
nfor
mat
ionhe
knowsaboutmet
othepol
i
cei
fIdon’
t
st
ayawayf
rom hi
sfami
l
yandBonga.I
hav
ebeent
hroughal
ott
hatIai
n’
t
scar
edofnot
hingbutwhenIf
oundout
t
hatIwasr
eal
l
ypr
egnantIknewIhadt
o
pr
otectmychi
l
danddowhatSpi
j
oms
want
.ThedaydayIl
ear
ntt
hatBonga
ki
l
ledKhumal
oIf
eltl
i
kepar
tofmewas
dy
ing.Fucki
nghi
m mi
ghthav
ebeenpar
t
oft
hepl
ant
omakeBongapaybut
somehowIenj
oyedev
erymomentI
spentwi
thhi
m.Thewayhewasal
way
s
i
ncont
rol
ofmybodywasmi
ndbl
owi
ng.
Il
ookatt
hismanbef
oremeandI
’
m
happyt
hathegotmeoutoft
hatpr
ison.
YesIknewt
hatSpi
j
omshadsomeone
whowaskeepi
nganey
eonmenott
hat
Iwasgoi
ngt
ori
skgoi
ngt
ojai
land
escape.
“
‘Notev
ery
thi
ngi
swhati
t’
sseems
Skhumbuz
o”
“
Shhhst
opt
alki
ngnowev
ery
thi
ngwi
l
l
beokay
”Hecont
inuesbr
ushi
ngmy
f
oreheadwi
thadampcl
oth.DoIt
ake
t
hisof
ferorshoul
dIt
ell
thet
rut
hbut
whati
fheki
l
lusi
fIt
ell
thet
rut
hoht
his
i
sget
ti
ngmessynow!

“
She’
ssobeaut
if
uli
sn’
tshe?
”
“
She’
sabal
lofener
gy”
“
OhI
’
m soi
nlov
ewi
thher
!”
“
She’
ssuchanangel
babyy
oushoul
d
meether
”
“
Ineedt
ogot
othemal
ltobuyher
cooki
es.Shel
ovescooki
esbutMi
ra
doesn’
twanthert
oeatcooki
esbecause
shef
art
sal
otwhensheat
ecooki
es”He
bur
sti
ntol
aught
erev
ersi
ncehecame
backt
oseehi
sdaught
ershe’
sal
lhe
t
alksaboutnoscr
atcht
hatt
heyar
eal
l
het
alksabout
.Kamar
iat
hisMi
rat
hat
i
t’
sir
kingt
hehe’
l
loutofme.
“
Hahahahashe’
ssof
unny
”If
akea
gi
ggl
e
“
Hawubabywabhuqanj
e”
“I
’
m notbaby
”
“
I’
m noty
ourf
ool
Gugu….
”Il
osti
tand
cuthi
m of
f
“
Whatdoy
ouex
pectmet
odoKamar
ia
t
his!Mi
rat
hat
!Theyar
eal
lyout
alk
aboutev
ersi
ncey
oumett
hem Soxwhat
aboutme?Youknowt
odayIwas
wr
it
ingoneoft
hedi
ff
icul
tex
am buty
ou
di
dn’
tev
enaskmehowwast
hepaper
?
I
t’
sal
laboutMi
ra,
Kamar
ia,
Mir
a
Kamar
iaI
’
mti
rednow!
”Hel
ooksatme
andsi
ghsheav
il
y
“
I’
m sor
rysweet
hear
tpl
easef
orgi
veme?
Howwasy
ourpaper
?”
“
Mxm!
”It
ryt
ogetupf
rom hi
m buthe
hol
dsmei
npl
ace.Wewer
ewat
chi
nga
mov
iewhi
l
ecuddl
i
ngorshoul
dIsayI
wasl
i
steni
ngt
oSoxgoi
ngonandon
aboutKamar
iaandMi
raar
g.Iwasso
happywhenIf
oundoutIwasnot
pr
egnantandI
’
m st
il
lHI
Vnegat
ive.
“
I’
m sor
ryst
handwasami
”Heki
ssesme
andIcan’
tresi
sthi
m.Heknowshi
s
ki
ssesar
emyweakness.If
eel
hishands
squeez
ingmybr
eastandmoansof
tl
yin
hi
smout
h.Het
rai
l
ssof
tki
ssesonmy
neckasIwr
apmyl
egsar
oundhi
swai
st.
Icoul
dfeel
hisdi
ckt
hroughhi
spant
s
poki
ngmypussyt
hroughmyal
ready
damppant
iesI
’
m wear
ingadr
essbyt
he
way,
mypussyi
spul
sat
ingwi
thdesi
re.I
bi
tehi
sbot
tom l
i
phel
etoutal
i
ttl
e
moanashepul
l
sawayandst
art
s
ki
ssi
ngmyneckmaki
ngmypant
ieswet
.
Myhandf
indhi
sbul
geandcar
essi
t
t
hroughhi
spant
sIcan’
tgetenoughof
howhugehei
sDamn!Imoansof
tl
yas
hebi
tesmyearandsl
i
dmypant
iest
o
t
hesi
debef
oresl
i
dinghi
sfi
nger
sinsi
de
mywetpussy
.Hepl
ayswi
thmypussy
sogoodt
hatIf
eel
hisf
inger
sst
roki
ng
myG-
spotsl
owl
y.Ican’
tcont
ainmy
sel
f
andIcanf
eel
mysel
fappr
oachi
ngmy
cl
i
max
“
Ahhhbabyi
t’
ssoooogood”If
eel
my
l
egsshaki
ngheknowsI
’
m aboutt
ocum
sohet
akesouthi
shar
dcockf
rom hi
s
sweatpant
sandshov
eiti
ntomycunt
wi
thoutwar
ning.Iscr
eam di
ggi
ngmy
nai
l
sonhi
sbi
ceps
“
Shi
t!
”Hest
art
srol
l
inghi
shi
ps,
my
scr
eamsgr
owsi
ntocr
iesashepounds
i
ntomehar
der
.Iswearnomanknows
hi
ssexgamel
i
ket
hisonei
nthi
swor
ld.
I
’
m al
lhi
ghupi
ncl
oudni
ne,
he’
shi
tt
ing
mesogoodt
hatIf
eel
li
keconf
essi
ngal
l
mysi
ns.
“
Ilov
eyouMaNcube”Hesay
spant
ing
ont
opofmeaf
terspi
l
li
nghi
sseed
i
nsi
deofme.
“
Ilov
eyout
ooDl
amani
”Ir
eal
l
ylov
ehi
m
andIdon’
tthi
nkIwi
l
lsur
viv
ewi
thout
hi
m.Igav
ehi
m al
lofmeIcan’
tgi
veup
af
teral
lthesey
ear
stoget
her
.Myphone
pi
ngsIt
akei
tandl
ookatt
hemessage
“
Ihopey
ouhav
ethoughtaboutwhatwe
t
alkedabout
.Whatdoy
ousayar
eyoui
n
or
?”
“
I’
min”It
ypet
hemessageandsendi
t
back.
-

I
mnandi
i-sexy
ezwaespeci
all
ywhen
y
ouar
edoi
ngi
twi
thsomeoney
oul
ove.
It
hinki
t’
sact
ual
l
yanamaz
ingt
hingGod
hasev
ercr
eat
edi
nthewor
ld.I
t’
smakes
onet
out
tert
hingst
hatmakesnosense
butnotal
way
ssomet
imest
het
hingswe
saywhenwear
edr
unkwi
thsex
ual
pl
easur
ear
ereal
.Hav
eyouev
erhad
someonet
odoy
ousogoodt
haty
ou
wi
shy
oucandosomet
hingf
ort
hem
j
ustt
oshowappr
eci
ati
on?Thatwasme
whent
hisNkosi
boywasdoi
ngt
hings,
hewasj
ustst
roki
ngaspotInev
er
t
houghtex
ist
edandev
eryt
imehedi
dhe
wasl
eav
ingmebr
eat
hlessl
y.Li
ke
my
sel
fwhomadeast
upi
dpr
omi
se
dur
ingt
hatl
ovemaki
ngsessi
onheal
so
ut
ter
edt
hescar
iesty
etbeaut
if
ulwor
ds
“
Mar
rymeMi
ra”andIdi
dn’
ttaket
hem
ser
iousbecauseIwasal
soi
nmyown
pl
anetbuther
ehei
snowr
epeat
ingt
he
samewor
dst
otel
lyouI
’
m st
unnedt
o
speakwoul
dbeanunder
stat
ement
.
“
Ilov
eyouMi
raMt
himkhul
upl
ease
makemet
hehappi
estmani
nthi
s
uni
ver
seandmar
ryme”Idon’
tknow
whatt
osay
.
“
Saysomet
hing”
“
Howdi
dyour
eacht
hatdeci
sion
Lwandl
elwenkosi
it’
shuge.
”If
inal
l
y
managet
out
tert
hosewor
ds.
“
Remembert
heweekIdi
sappear
edon
y
ou?
”
“
Yes”
“
Ihadsomet
imeal
onet
hinki
ng,
doi
ng
somesoul
sear
chi
ngy
ouknow.
Honest
lyspeaki
ngIhav
enev
erbel
i
eved
i
nsoul
mat
esandr
elat
ionshi
psand
wi
tnessi
ngev
ery
thi
ngt
hathappenedi
n
mypar
ent
’smar
ri
agedi
dn’
thel
patal
l
.
ThenIhadt
omeety
ouandpr
etendt
o
l
ovey
ounotknowi
ngy
ouwi
l
lsweep
y
ourwayr
ighti
ntomyhear
tandmake
mywor
ldupsi
dedowni
nagoodway
.
Youi
ntox
icat
edmewi
tht
hef
ragr
ance
ofy
oursoul
ful
lov
eIknewt
hatIwantt
o
keepy
ou.Theny
ouf
oundoutev
ery
thi
ng
andbyt
hatt
imeIwasheadov
erheel
s
f
ory
ou.Wheny
oudi
sappear
edonusmy
wor
ldshutdowncompl
etel
y.Icoul
dn’
t
br
eat
hehowIwasgoi
ngt
obr
eat
he
wi
thoutai
r.Youl
eftwi
thmysoul
andmy
hear
tandIwasl
eftwi
thashel
lofa
body
.Iwasdeadi
nthei
nsi
det
heonl
y
t
hingt
hatwasl
eftwast
odi
ephy
sical
l
y
andwhent
hatal
mosthappenedi
twasa
wakeupcal
lforme.Icoul
dn’
tbeart
he
t
houghtofmypar
ent
slosi
nganot
her
sonagai
n,Icoul
dn’
tbeart
het
houghtof
Snol
osi
nganot
herbr
other
,Icoul
dn’
t
beart
het
houghtofmyuncl
elosi
ng
anot
hernephew.Igav
eitmyal
lj
ustf
or
t
hem andf
ightatsomepoi
ntI
conv
incedmy
sel
fthatt
heonl
ywayf
or
met
omov
efor
war
dist
ohav
esomeone
i
nmyl
i
fe.IknowIwasnotf
orcedt
o
mov
eonbutIf
eltl
i
kei
twhatIneededt
o
dot
obeabl
etomov
eony
ouknow.
”He
heav
esasi
ghandhol
dsmet
ight
lyi
nhi
s
ar
ms
“
ImetAy
andaandenj
oyedwhatwas
happeni
ngbet
weenusatsomepoi
ntI
f
indmy
sel
flov
inghery
ouknow.Then
y
oucamebackwi
thmyhear
tandsoul
I
f
eltwhol
eandal
i
veagai
n.Icamet
oa
r
eal
i
zat
iont
hatmyhappi
nessl
i
eswi
th
y
ou,
wher
every
ougomyhappi
nesswi
l
l
al
way
sbewi
thy
ou.Iwon’
tli
etoy
ouand
sayIhav
enev
erl
ovedAy
andabecauseI
hav
eandIst
il
ldobutI
’
minl
ovewi
th
y
ouMi
ra.Wecancountf
rom nowt
oa
decadey
ouwi
l
lst
il
lbet
heonet
hatI
wantt
ospendmyl
i
fewi
thbecausey
ou
andIwer
epai
redupi
nheav
enmy
dear
estdar
li
ng.Obst
acl
eswi
l
lal
way
sbe
t
her
ebutt
heuni
ver
sewi
l
lal
way
sfi
nda
wayt
oconnectt
wopeopl
ewhower
e
meantt
obe.Nei
thert
hewas,
nort
her
e
i
sandt
her
enev
erwi
l
lbeany
oneot
her
t
heny
oui
nmyl
i
fe.
”WowI
mlostof
wor
dst
osay
.
“
It
’sokayt
akey
ourt
imey
oudon’
thav
e
t
orushandIknowy
ouar
edeal
i
ngwi
th
al
otr
ightnowbutknowt
hatIwi
l
l
al
way
sli
vebyy
oul
i
key
ourshadow”
“
Ilov
eyouLwandl
elwenkosi
Nkosi
”it
’s
t
heonl
ythi
ngIcansayr
ightnowt
hat
I
’
m cer
tai
nof
.Mymi
ndi
sraci
ngwi
th
t
hought
sIhav
enev
ert
houghtof
mar
ri
ageatt
heageof23y
ear
sandI
’
m
st
il
ltr
yingt
ogetmyl
i
fet
oget
her
.Hi
s
br
eakupwi
thhi
sgi
rl
fr
iendi
sst
il
lnew
kusengenz
ekanomay
ini
.Whati
fthegi
rl
st
il
lwanthi
m back?Idon’
thav
eener
gy
f
ordr
ama.Ihav
eal
otonmypl
ater
ight
now.Idon’
tneedany
thi
ngt
hatwi
l
ladd
onmydepr
essi
on.Thent
her
e’smy
daught
erwhom Ihav
enev
erpl
ayeda
r
oleofamot
heri
nherl
i
fe.Iwantt
ogi
ve
i
tmyal
ltoherIwantt
obemor
ethen
j
ustamot
herwhogav
ebi
rt
htoher
.I
wantt
obehandsonandt
akecar
eof
her
.I’
m wokenupbyhi
m deepi
ntomy
pussy
“
Lwe.
.nko.
.si
”Igaspashemakesdeep
t
hrust
sandhol
dhi
mti
ght
ly.I
t’
sfeel
sso
goodwai
tdi
dhewearacondom.Ihav
e
not
icedt
hisboydoesn’
tli
kepr
otect
ion
andt
hel
astt
hingIwanti
stof
all
pr
egnant
.YhooIcan’
t,t
hatex
per
ience
f
ormewashor
ri
fyi
nganddepr
essi
ngI
don’
tIwantt
oev
erf
all
pregnantagai
nin
myl
i
fe!
“
Lwenkosi
didy
ouputont
her
ubber
”
“
Angekengi
kchamel
ebaby
”(Iwon’
t
cum i
ntoy
oubaby
)
“
No.
.no.
..
no.
.Lwenkosi
..pl
ease.
.get
.
.out
”I’
m hy
per
vent
il
ati
ng.If
eel
his
wei
ghtof
fhi
smybody
“
Heyheybr
eat
heokay
,br
eat
heMi
ra,
br
eat
hedammi
t!
”Hei
shol
dingmei
nhi
s
ar
msandIcanheart
hathe’
spani
cki
ng.
If
inal
l
ymanaget
ogetmynor
mal
br
eat
hing
“
Youscar
edme”Hewhi
sper
sIf
eel
war
mli
qui
donmyf
all
i
ngonmyf
ace.
“
I’
m sor
ry”Iwhi
sper
“
Noi
m sor
rybabyIshoul
dn’
thav
e…”
“
Shhhi
t’
sokay
”Ist
ayi
nhi
sar
msf
ora
moment
.
“
Weshoul
dgetgoi
ng”
“
Whatt
imei
sit
?”Iask
“
6:30”
“
Yhooi
t’
sal
readyl
ateLwenkosi
Kamar
ia
i
sanear
lybedI
’
m sur
emom i
sawake
now.Pl
easet
akemehome!
”I’
m
pani
cki
ngbuthe’
sdoi
ngev
ery
thi
nghe
cant
okeepmecal
m.Lucki
l
ywe
managet
ogetoutofhi
shousewi
thout
bei
ngseenbyhi
sfol
ks.
“
Igoty
ouokay
”Hesqueez
esmyhand.
mom i
sgoi
ngt
oki
l
lme.Not
hingcoul
d
hav
epr
epar
edmef
ort
hedr
amat
hat
t
ranspi
res.Uncl
eKi
sonabouthowhe
wantmet
ost
ayawayf
rom Lwenkosi
andIl
osti
tbecausehehasnor
ightt
o
t
ell
met
hat
.Whati
rksmet
hemosti
s
t
hatheat
tacksLwenkosi
.Iunder
stand
mymom f
rust
rat
ionshowev
ershe
shoul
dtel
lhermant
ost
ickt
ohi
slane.
I
’
m st
il
lex
haust
edsoIdeci
det
osl
eep.
I
’
m wokenupbyGogo
“
Nunuz
a
“
Gogo”
“
Wakeupnowy
ouhav
eav
isi
tor
”
“
Whoi
sit
?”
“
Shesay
sshe’
sSt
ar”myhear
tleapwi
th
j
oy.Ir
oll
outofbedandf
reshenupt
hen
makemywayt
othel
i
vingr
oom.
“
Boobear
!”
“
MySt
ar!
”shepul
l
smei
nherembr
ace
andscoopsmeupabi
t
“
Imi
ssy
ousomuch”
“
Imi
ssedy
out
oomar
awenay
ouj
ust
di
tchedmenj
eandwentt
o
Johannesbur
g”Sheheav
esasi
gh
“
I’
m sor
ry.
..
wher
e’sKamar
ia?
”
“
Nonowentwi
thhert
oseeZo”Gogo
say
s.
“
Ohcanwet
akeawal
kboorbear
”
“
Sur
e..
.GogoIwi
l
lbeback”
“
Awumekancanewemf
anant
ombaz
ane
ungubani
wena?
”
“
Stari
smom Cabasi
ster
’sdaught
er
gogo”
“
Mmhhuy
afanamaannoNono”
“
Who’
sNono?
”St
arasks
“
It
’smymot
her
”
“
Yourgr
annyi
swei
rd”St
arwhi
sper
sin
myear
“
Wear
egoi
nggogo”
“
Ohokay
”
“
Leav
eRockybehi
ndIgoty
ou”
“
Okay
”Shet
akesmyhandi
ntoher
sand
weheadout
.
“
Sohowwasj
ozi
”
“
Iwasn’
tatj
ozi
Iwasar
oundIl
i
edt
o
Aunt
yanduncl
e”
“
Ohwhy
?”
“
Ijustneededsomespace,
youcomi
ng
backhi
tmehar
dboobearIf
eltl
i
keI
wasl
osi
ngy
ou”
“
Youar
enotl
osi
ngmeSt
ary
ouwi
l
l
al
way
sbet
hesi
sterInev
erhad”
“
Idon’
twantt
obey
oursi
sterBooBear
!”
Sheshout
s
“
I’
m sor
ryf
orshout
ingi
t’
sjustt
hat
..
”she
si
ghsandwef
all
int
osi
l
encej
ust
wal
ki
ngascar
skeeppassi
ngby
.
“
Isawy
ouwi
tht
hatmor
ononTwi
tt
er
ar
eyouguy
sbackt
oget
her
?”
“
Kindof
”
“
Hedoesn’
tdeser
vey
ou”
“
Star
….”
“
Shhhi
t’
sokaywedon’
thav
etot
alk
abouthi
m.”Wi
thamov
ethatsur
pri
ses
meshehol
dsmet
oherar
msand
smashesmyl
i
psi
ntomi
ne.
“
Do.
..
Dol
l
face”Ohshi
t!

.
CHAPTER49(
unedi
ted)

“
Ayandat
alk!
”Mydadscr
eamscausi
ng
met
ojumpabi
t
“
Umm uh.
.I
’
m sor
rydaddy
”
“
Sor
ry?Yousaysor
ry?Justanswert
he
damnaskar
eyoust
il
lvi
rgi
nyesorno?
”I
pl
aymywi
thmyf
inger
slooki
ngdown.
Myhear
tist
huddi
nghar
dIsweari
t’
s
goi
ngt
ocomeoutofmymout
h.
“
LookatmewhenI
’
mtal
ki
ngt
oyou!
!”I
l
ookupathi
m wi
thgl
i
steni
ngey
es
“
I’
m sor
rydaddyI
’
m notav
irgi
n
any
mor
e”i
t’
scomesoutasawhi
sper
“
OhAy
anda!
”mymom ex
clai
ms
“
OhI
’
m goi
ngt
oki
l
lthatboy
!Hewi
l
ltel
l
mewhogav
ehi
m aper
missi
ont
oent
er
mykr
aal
!!
”Hewal
ksoutf
umi
ngwi
th
anger
.Ihopehe’
snotgoi
ngt
ohi
mri
ght
now.Il
ookatmom andt
hel
ookonher
f
acet
ear
smeapar
t,she’
sdi
sappoi
nted
i
nme.
“
I’
m sor
rymama”Iwhi
sper
Sheget
sup,
Ihol
dherar
m shel
ooksat
myhandonherar
m wi
thpur
edi
sgust
andy
anksi
tof
f
“
Mommypl
easesaysomet
hing”Icr
y
shedoesn’
tsayany
thi
ngbutwal
ksout
l
eav
ingmecr
yingmyey
ebal
l
sout
.

I
’
mfumi
ngwi
thangerasI
’
m speedi
ng
homeandmyuncl
eisf
oll
owi
ngme
behi
nd.Bl
oodcan’
tst
oppour
ingoutof
mynose.Idon’
tunder
standwhatt
he
hel
ldi
dheat
tackedmef
or.Iopent
he
gat
eusi
ngmyr
emot
eanddr
ivei
nthen
pul
lov
er.Ij
umpoutoft
hecarandr
unt
o
t
hehouse.
“
Yini
wangenaugi
j
ima.
..
youar
ebl
eedi
ng
whathappened!
”Mom get
suponher
chai
randwal
kst
ome.Theyar
ehav
ing
br
eakf
ast
“
It
’suncl
emom heat
tackedme”
“
What
?Uy
ahl
any
ayi
niuKhuz
ani
”Mom
say
sasshemakesmesi
tdownont
he
chai
r
“
Doesi
thur
tLwandl
e”Snoaskwi
th
gr
imaceonherf
ace.Inodwi
thmyhead
“
I’
m sor
rywhydi
duncl
eat
tackedy
ou”
“
Itwasaboutt
imey
ouhav
ebeen
di
srespect
inghi
mforsol
ongnow”Dad
chi
rpi
n
“
Thanky
ousbal
iIhadt
oteacht
hisboy
al
esson.Akangi
boni
njeuLwandl
e!”
Uncl
esay
sashewal
ksi
n.Igetupand
hi
debehi
ndmymom
“
Whatdi
dhedof
ory
out
oat
tackhi
m
l
i
ket
his!Lookathi
m he’
sbl
eedi
ng!
!”
Mom r
oar
sinanger
“
Lwandl
etal
ktomel
i
keI
’
m hi
sfr
iendZo
het
hinkshe’
samannowr
ight
?Iwant
ed
hi
mtoshowmehe’
saman”
“
Byat
tacki
nghi
m!Vi
olencedoesn’
t
sol
veany
thi
ngKhuz
ani
!!
”
“
Howmanyt
imeshav
eIt
oldhi
mtost
ay
awayf
rom Mi
rabuthe’
sdoesn’
twantt
o
l
i
stent
ome.
”
“
Whydoy
ouwantmet
ost
ayaway
f
rom Mi
raIl
oveher
”
“
Youhav
eagi
rl
fr
ienddammi
t!
”
“
AyandaandIbr
okeupMal
ume!
”
“
Ohsoqui
ckl
yandnowy
ouar
emov
ing
t
oMi
ra?Howni
cei
tist
obey
ou
br
eaki
ngev
erygi
rl
’shear
tandmov
eon
soqui
ckl
ywi
thoutev
enf
eel
i
nggui
l
ty!I
won’
tal
l
owy
out
opl
ayMi
ramyboy
!”
“
Whosai
dI’
m goi
ngt
opl
ayherIl
ove
her
!”
“
That
’sex
act
lywhaty
ousai
daboutt
o
Ay
andabutl
ookwhatdi
dyoudot
oher
!
St
ayt
hef
uckawayf
rom Mi
ra!
”
“
Aykahl
eKhuz
ani
youknowLwandl
e
andMi
ral
oveeachot
hert
hebondt
hey
shar
ecan’
tbebr
eakabl
eyoucan’
t
puni
shmysonf
ort
hat
!”
Mom say
s
“
HeeeZoar
eyouencour
agi
ngt
hisboy
t
okeephur
ti
nggi
rl
shuh?
Lwandl
elwenkosi
isusedt
ogetwhathe
wantespeci
all
ywheni
t’
scomest
ogi
rl
s.
Fi
rsti
twasNandi
hei
mpr
egnat
edt
he
poorgi
rlknowi
ngv
erywel
lthathe
doesn’
tlov
eherandpl
easedon’
ttel
lme
i
twasami
stakebecauset
her
ear
e
t
housandsofcondomsi
nthi
swor
ld.
He’
sir
responsi
bleandsel
fi
sh.Whydi
d
heent
ert
ainedNandi
from t
hef
ir
stpl
ace
becauseheknewhedoesn’
tlov
eher
?
Heshoul
d’v
etol
dthepoorgi
rlt
het
rut
h
butbecauseLwandl
elwenkosi
issel
fi
sh,
cr
uel
andar
roganthebr
oket
hegi
rl
’s
v
irgi
nit
ypr
etendi
ngt
olov
ehert
hen
dumpheraf
tert
hat
!Weeksl
aterhe
f
oundoutshe’
spr
egnantwenz
ani
?He
wasal
ll
oveydov
eywi
thMi
rai
nfr
ontof
Nandi
knowi
ngv
erywel
lthatNandi
l
ovedhi
m.Hepushedherandt
heyl
ost
t
hei
rbabyngal
ent
oyakhey
okut
hihe
doesn’
tthi
nkandal
lhecar
esabouti
s
hi
msel
f!Secondl
yhewasnev
er
supposedt
ofal
li
nlov
ewi
thMi
raf
rom
t
hef
ir
stpl
ace.Heknewt
hepl
anwhat
washehopi
ngt
oachi
evev
ele?Okay
f
inehef
all
inl
ovewi
thherwhyhedi
dn’
t
comecl
eant
oherbef
oreshef
oundout
her
sel
f?Nowi
t’
sAy
andahesai
dhel
ove
t
hepoorgi
rlbutnowt
hatMi
rai
sback
he’
sgal
l
ivant
ingwi
thMi
raandKamar
ia
knowi
ngv
erywel
lthathe’
sapubl
i
c
f
igur
e.Theyar
etr
endi
ngonsoci
al
net
wor
ksandweknowhowbr
utal
soci
al
net
wor
ksi
s.Bot
hAy
andaandMi
raar
e
t
heoneswhoar
ebei
ngj
udgedhar
shl
y
nothi
m!He’
sget
ti
ngawaywi
th
ev
ery
thi
ngnj
eyenauphul
ainhl
i
ziy
o
z
abant
uandgetwaywi
tht
hat
.How
sur
eishet
hathel
ovesMi
ra?Notso
l
ongagohewascl
aimi
ngt
olov
e
Ay
anda!He’
sconf
usedandIdon’
twant
hi
m nearMi
ra!
”I’
m notconf
usedIl
ove
Mi
raandshe’
stheoneIwant
.
“
Ohpl
easeev
ery
onemakesmi
stakes
Khuz
ani
noonei
sper
fect
.
Lwandl
elwenkosi
isst
il
laboyal
l
owhi
m
t
omakemi
stakesandl
ear
nfr
om t
hem”
Mom say
s
“
Hedoesn’
tlear
nZol
ekahenev
erl
ear
ns
hencehekeepshur
ti
ngt
hesegi
rl
s!What
y
ouar
edoi
ngr
ightnowi
sencour
agi
ng
hi
mtokeeponhur
ti
ngt
hesegi
rl
s”
“
Youst
art
edf
ir
stbyaski
nghi
mto
pr
etendt
obef
ri
endswi
thMi
ra!Don’
t
comeher
ewi
tht
hatshi
ttomewheny
ou
ar
etheonewhot
aughthi
mtopl
aywi
th
peopl
e’
sfeel
i
ngs!Youar
etheonewho
t
aughthi
m changi
nggi
rl
sli
kepant
iesi
s
ar
ightt
hingt
odo!Doy
out
hinkwhenhe
spendst
imewi
thy
ouandseei
ngy
ou
sl
eepi
ngwi
thev
eryski
rtt
hatpassesby
hedi
dn’
tseet
hat
?Youar
ehi
srol
e
model
andhecopi
esex
act
lywhaty
ou
dosodon’
tcomeher
eandspi
tshi
t
Khuz
ani
!Nowt
haty
ouhav
eBongay
ou
f
orgott
haty
ouar
etheonewhowas
f
ucki
ngar
oundi
nfr
ontofhi
m!”
“
Heyheyal
lthesewomenknewwhat
t
heywer
eget
ti
ngt
hei
rsel
vesi
ntoInev
er
sai
dIl
ovet
hem knowi
ngex
act
lyt
hatI
don’
t”
“
Soy
ouar
etel
l
ingmet
hatnoneoft
hem
hav
eev
ercat
chf
eel
i
ngs?
”Mom asks
“
Heywear
enother
etodi
scussmyl
ove
l
i
fei
thasnot
hingt
odowi
thy
ouZol
eka
st
ayoutofmybusi
ness!
”
“
Ayf
usegKhuz
ani
uphi
ndenj
efut
hi
ushay
eumt
anami
!”(
Dar
eat
tackmy
chi
l
dagai
n)
“
Asl
ongashedoesn’
twantt
ost
ay
awayf
rom Mi
raIwi
l
lst
il
lbeatt
heshi
t
outofhi
m!”
“
Jusdar
edoi
tagai
nuz
obonaf
uthi
get
outofmyhouse!
”
“
I’
mleav
ingv
elenx
!!”Hewal
ksout
“
Comel
etmel
ookatt
hat
”mom say
sas
het
akesmyhandweheadt
othei
r
bedr
oom.Isi
tont
hebedandshet
akes
t
hef
ir
stai
dki
tfi
rstbef
oredoi
ngwhat
shedoest
hebest
.
“
Doesi
thur
ts”Inodwi
thmyhead
“
Aski
esmyboy
”onceshe’
sdoneshe
gi
vesmepai
nki
l
ler
sandIdownt
hem.
“
Thanky
oumama”
“
Youdon’
thav
etoi
tsmyj
obt
otake
car
eofy
oubaby
”
“
Mama”
“
Yesboy
”
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oobaby
”Iki
ssherl
i
psand
wal
koutheadi
ngt
omybedr
oom.Il
i
eon
mybedt
hinki
ngaboutt
hewonder
ful
ni
ghtIhadwi
thmyDol
l
face.That
’sl
ove
maki
ngsessi
onwasmi
ndbl
owi
ng,
Ifel
t
usconnect
ingi
nawayt
hatwehav
e
nev
erconnect
edbef
ore.I
tfel
tli
keIwas
maki
ngl
ovef
ort
hef
ir
stt
imei
nmyl
i
fe.I
l
ovet
hewayshebecomesv
ulner
abl
e
under
neat
hme,
Ilov
ehowherpussy
cl
enchesar
oundmydi
ckt
aki
ngmet
o
wor
ldofecst
asy
,Il
ovehowshe
scr
eamsmynamewhenIhi
tther
ight
spotandl
eav
esherbr
eat
hlessl
y,Il
ove
t
heshapeofherbi
gcl
i
tpr
otr
udi
ngf
rom
herf
olds.Ir
ememberatschool
oneof
mycl
assmat
esoncesai
dagi
rlwi
tha
bi
gcl
i
tisdamngoodi
nbedandIdi
dn’
t
bel
i
evei
tImeancomeont
hegoodness
oft
hepussyhasnot
hingt
odowi
th
shapeandsi
zebutI
’
m st
art
ingt
o
bel
i
evehi
m.I
t’
ssoundscr
azyIknowbut
IswearMi
rahasonehel
l
ahotpussy
baf
ethuy
eses!Isur
renderi
tal
lwhenI
’
m
bur
ieddeepi
ntoheri
t’
sfeel
sli
kea
par
adi
se!I
’
m sur
eri
ghtnowy
out
hinki
ng
I
t’
sthepowerofherpussypossest
hat
makesmewantt
omar
ryherwel
lthat
’s
nott
rue.Themi
ser
abl
eyear
sIspent
wi
thouthermademer
eal
i
zet
hatshe’
s
t
heoneIwantnomat
terwhatbutdoI
deser
veher
?myuncl
e’
swor
dsar
e
echoi
ngi
nmyear
sIcan’
tst
opbutt
hink
shedeser
vesbet
ter
.

I
’
m cuddl
i
ngwi
thmybabyaf
tert
hat
sessi
on.Ihav
edeci
dedt
ost
opusi
ng
cont
racept
ives.IwantababyIknowi
t’
s
ani
mmat
uredeci
sionsi
nceI
’
m st
il
l
st
udy
ingbutwhatcanagi
rldowhenher
spoti
nherf
iancésl
i
fei
sbei
ng
t
hreat
ened.Shemakesapl
ant
okeep
t
hef
iancébygi
vi
nghi
m whathel
oves
t
hemostt
osecur
eherpl
ace.Ican’
tlose
Soxhe’
smyonl
yfami
l
yandIhav
eto
makesur
eIdon’
tlosehi
m especi
all
ynot
t
omybestf
ri
end.I
sshest
il
lmybest
f
ri
endaf
tert
his?Si
ghIdon’
tknowr
eal
l
y
Iwantt
oseeherIr
eal
l
ydobutIcan’
t
br
ingmy
sel
ftodoi
t.I
’
m scar
edofmy
r
eact
iont
owar
dsher
.
“
Ilov
eyouDl
ami
ni”
“
Ilov
eyout
oobaby
”
“
Andknowt
hatIwi
l
lnev
ergi
veupon
y
ounomat
terwhat
”Hesmi
l
eswi
del
y
andki
ssesmyf
orehead.Ther
e’s
someoneont
hedoor
,heget
supt
o
at
tendi
t.Fewsecondsl
ateIhearal
i
ttl
e
v
oicescr
eami
ng“
Daddy
!!
”Igetupt
o
seewhat
’sgoi
ngon.
“
Hel
l
odaddy
’spr
incess”Soxsay
sashe
t
hrowsheront
heai
randcat
chi
ngher
agai
nshe’
sgi
ggl
i
ngnonest
op.
“
Hel
l
omom Bonga”
“
Himychi
l
dunj
ani
”
“
I’
mfi
neandy
our
sel
f”
“
I’
m okaysi
s.I
’
m sor
ryt
ocome
unannounced”
“
It
’sokaymadowantany
thi
ngt
odr
ink?
”
“
I’
m notst
ayi
ngact
ual
l
yIj
ustcamet
o
t
ell
yout
hatI
’
mthr
owi
ngawel
come
par
tyf
orMi
raandIknowshewi
l
lbe
happyi
fyoucomesi
s.Iknowt
he
si
tuat
ioni
snoti
deal
butpl
ease
st
handwasami
don’
tthr
owy
our
f
ri
endshi
pawaybecauseofamanwho
doesn’
tcar
eabouty
ourf
ri
endshi
pyet
hecl
aimst
olov
eyou.
”Shesay
s
t
hrowi
ngdagger
satSoxbuthedoesn’
t
ev
enseenot
icehe’
stooengr
ossedon
hi
sdaught
er.
“
EishIdon’
tknowmama”
“
PleasebabyI
’
m beggi
ngy
ou”
“
Iwi
l
lseewhatIcandomom butI
’
m not
pr
omi
singany
thi
ng”
“
Okaysi
sIwi
l
lsendy
oual
lthedet
ail
s
aboutt
hepar
tyneh”
“
Alr
ightMama”
“
Thanky
ou.
..
cupcakel
et’
sgo”
“
Canshest
ayspl
easeIwi
l
lbr
ingher
l
ater
”Soxsay
stomom BongaIcansee
t
hat
’sshe’
sannoy
edbutshehasno
r
easont
oref
use
“
Ifshecr
iescal
lme”
“
Iwi
l
lthanky
ou”sheki
ssesher
gr
anddaught
erandl
eav
es.
“
Babymeetmydaught
er
Kamar
ia.
..
pri
ncesst
hisi
sdaddy
’swi
fe
Gugu.
”
“
Hel
l
odaddy
’swi
fe”
“
Hel
l
odaddy
’spr
incess”she’
sso
gor
geousj
eal
ousdown.
“
Doy
ouwantcooki
es”Iask
“
Yespl
ease!
”IseeSoxsmi
l
ing.It
ake
t
wocooki
esandgi
veher
.Wechi
l
l
t
oget
herl
i
steni
ngt
oKamar
iabl
abbi
ng,
she’
sfunnyandv
eryt
alkat
ive.Atsome
poi
ntshe’
sspeaki
ngal
anguaget
hatwe
don’
tunder
standIassumei
t’
sa
l
anguaget
heyar
espeaki
nKeny
a.
“
She’
sbeaut
if
ulneh”Soxsay
saswe
bot
hlookatKamar
iawho’
ssl
eepi
ng
peacef
ull
y
“
Yes”Isi
gh
“
Whati
sit
”
“
Not
hing”
“
Baby
”
“
Idon’
twantt
oupsety
ou”Hehol
dsme
f
rom behi
ndandki
ssesmyneck
sendi
ngchi
l
lsdownmyspi
ne
“
Tal
ktome”
“
Ihav
ebeenl
ooki
ngatherbabyal
lIsee
i
sMi
ranj
ear
eyousur
eshe’
syour
s?”
“
Icanf
eel
thi
sconnect
ionbaby
”
“
Youcan’
ttr
ustt
hatbabyy
ouneedt
obe
sur
e.Thi
schi
l
dcoul
dbeLwandl
e’
s.Why
di
dshei
ntr
oducet
ohi
mfi
rstbef
oret
o
y
ou?Lwandl
elwenkosi
ist
hef
ir
stone
whogott
ospendt
imewi
thKamar
ia
whysomet
hingi
sfi
shyher
e”
“
Shecoul
dn’
treachmebaby
”
“
Ify
ousayso”
“
Iknowbabyy
ouar
elooki
ngoutf
orme
andt
hanky
ousol
et’
sdot
hist
estonce
andf
oral
l
”
“
Justt
obesur
est
handwasami
”Iki
ss
hi
sli
ps

Icanhearhi
sgi
ggl
esal
lthewayf
rom
t
hepassageasIt
ryt
ofi
ndmy
sel
fto
wher
ehi
sgi
ggl
esar
ecomi
ngf
rom.I
f
inal
l
ymakei
ttot
hel
i
vingr
oom t
his
housei
senor
mousandbeaut
if
ul.
“
Uncl
e..st
op.
.it
!”Hegi
ggl
eswi
ggl
i
ng
hi
msel
fasSpi
dert
ickl
eshi
m.Icanhel
p
asmi
l
eonmyf
acet
hati
saccompani
ed
byt
ear
s.Heseemsgoodwi
thchi
l
dren
andmysonseemsf
reear
oundhi
m.
Lor
dwhatdoIdomakunj
e?DoIal
l
ow
t
hismant
otakecar
eofusordoImake
hi
m ki
l
lus?

IpushSt
arbutshehol
dsmet
ight
lyokay
whaty
ouhav
eknowaboutSt
ari
sthat
shel
i
ftswei
ght
ssoobv
iousl
yshe’
s
st
rongt
henme.
“
Starmaan!
”Shel
etsgoofme
“
Sur
endodasi
kusi
zengani
?”St
arsay
s
“
Iwantt
otal
ktomygi
rl
fr
iend”Lwenkosi
r
epl
i
esandIcanheari
nhi
svoi
cet
hat
he’
str
yingt
okeepcal
m
“
Youmeanmygi
rl
fr
iend?
”Lwenkosi
chuckl
es
“
Dol
l
facecanwet
alkpl
ease”
“
BoorbearIcameher
etoseey
ouso
pl
easedon’
tyoudar
edi
srespectmel
i
ke
t
hat
”
“
ComeonSt
arwhenwear
edoneIwi
l
l
comet
oyou”
“
Youknowwhatf
uckof
fdon’
tcomet
o
mewhenhebr
eaksy
ourhear
t!
!”Ihear
herf
oot
stepswal
ki
ngaway
“
Star
!”
“
Whatt
hef
ucki
sgoi
ngonMi
ra!
”
“
Dontshoutatme”Hesi
ghs
“
Sor
rycomel
et’
sgeti
nthecarandt
alk”
Het
akesmyhandandwewal
ktohi
s
carandgeti
natt
hebackseat
.
“
Whot
hehel
li
sthat
?”
“
It
’sSt
arshe’
smyadopt
ivemom’
ssi
ster
daught
er”
“
Whyi
sshecal
l
ingy
ouhergi
rl
fr
iend?
”
“
Stardoesn’
twantt
ounder
standt
hatI
don’
tlov
ehert
hatway
.Wehav
ehad
somesex
ual
encount
ersf
oray
earbut
t
hatwasj
ustt
hat
.Icoul
dn’
tbr
ingmy
sel
f
t
olov
esomeoneel
sewhenIknewI
’
m
st
il
li
nlov
ewi
thy
ou”
“
Yhooosowhatdoest
hismeanMi
raar
e
y
ougay
?”Ican’
tmi
sst
heshocki
nhi
s
v
oice
“
NoI
’
m notgaynorbi
sex
ual
.Ihav
eno
f
eel
i
ngsf
orgi
rl
s.Theonl
yfeel
i
ngsI
hav
eisf
orboy
soneboyf
ort
hatmat
ter
andt
hati
syouLwandl
elwenkosi
.
Pl
easeIdon’
twantust
ofi
ghtbecause
oft
his.Thepast4y
ear
shav
en’
tbeen
easyf
orbot
hofusst
handwasami
we
f
oundour
sel
vesdoi
ngt
hingsj
ustt
o
makei
tthr
ought
heday
.I’
m not
j
ust
if
yingwhatIdi
dbutj
ustasy
ou
f
oundsol
acei
ndr
ugsIf
oundsol
acei
n
t
hesex
ual
pleasur
eshewasgi
vi
ngme.
Noy
oudon’
thav
etowor
ryt
hati
fwe
goi
ngt
hroughar
oughpat
chIwi
l
lfi
nd
sol
acei
nanot
her
’sper
sondi
ckorpussy
becauset
hatnothowIwantt
odeal
wit
h
mypai
nnomor
e.Il
ear
ntt
hehar
dway
Lwandl
elwenkosi
ifIcoul
dtakebackt
he
handsbackoft
imeKamar
iawoul
dn’
tbe
her
e.”Heheav
esahugesi
ghandhol
ds
myhandsi
nhi
s
“
Inot
icedhowy
ouf
reakedoutt
his
mor
ningwhenIt
oldy
out
hatIwasn’
t
wear
ingar
ubber
”
“
Dontev
erdot
hatagai
nIdon’
twantt
o
f
all
pregnantev
eragai
ninmyl
i
fe
Lwandl
elwenkosi
!”Isnap
“
I’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
tmeant
oshout
pr
egnancywasnotanex
cit
ing
ex
per
iencef
ormel
i
keot
herwomenout
t
her
e.I
twasscar
yanddepr
essi
ngas
f
uck.Idon’
twantt
ofal
lpr
egnantagai
n
notnowandnotev
eni
nthenex
tli
fe”
“
It
’sal
lmyf
aul
tyouhadt
ogot
hrough
al
loft
hat
.Ifonl
y….
Ihav
ecausedy
ouso
muchpai
niny
ourl
i
feMi
raIdon’
t
deser
vey
ou.
..
.”
“
Dontsayt
hatpl
ease.
”
“
Shhhl
et’
smef
ini
shsweet
hear
t.
”Inod
wi
thmyhead
“
Ilov
eyouMi
ra,
Ihav
enev
erl
oved
any
onel
i
key
ouandIwi
l
lnev
erwi
l
l.You
ar
eev
ery
thi
ngIcoul
dev
erdesi
re.I
’
m so
i
nlov
ewi
thy
ourbeaut
if
ulsoul
.You
war
m myhear
tandsetmysoul
onf
ir
e.
Youenr
ichmyl
i
fei
nmor
ethenone
way
sIcanev
erex
pressi
nwor
ds.I
t’
s
t
hepur
it
yofy
ourl
ovet
hatmakesmy
mor
ningssobr
ightandmyev
eni
ngs
i
mmensel
yenchant
ed.Justl
i
kesome
t
hingsi
nli
fet
hatnev
erchangemyl
ove
f
ory
ouwi
l
lnev
erchangebutIcan’
tdo
t
hisIcan’
tal
l
owy
out
odot
hist
o
y
our
sel
f.Youdeser
vebet
terMi
ra.You
ar
esobeaut
if
ul,
goodhear
ted,
i
ntel
l
igent
,sex
yal
ltheposi
ti
vewor
dsi
n
t
hiswor
lddescr
ibesy
ou.
”
“
Uthi
niki
mikahl
ekahl
eLwenkosi
”(what
ar
eyousay
ingt
ome)
“
Ihav
edonesomanywr
ongsi
nmyl
i
fe
especi
all
ytoy
ouandIhopei
t’
snott
oo
l
atet
odot
her
ightt
hing.I
’
mlet
ti
ngy
ou
goMi
rabecausey
oudeser
vebet
ter
t
henacr
uel
egocent
ri
cbast
ard…”
“
Lwenkosi
youar
ebr
eaki
ngupwi
th
me?
”I’
mtr
embl
i
ngandt
ear
sar
efal
l
ing
downmyf
ace
“
Babyi
t’
sfort
hebest
…”
“
Forwho?
”
“
Fory
oust
handwasami
,Il
ovey
ouso
mucht
oal
l
owy
out
omakeahuge
mi
stakebyget
ti
ngbackwi
thme.Idon’
t
deser
vey
ouIdon’
tdeser
veany
onef
or
t
hatmat
ter
.”
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
Ilov
eyou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo…”
“
Thenwhyhuh?Whyar
ehur
ti
ngmel
i
ke
t
his?Ar
eyoubackwi
thy
ourgi
rl
fr
iend?
”
“
NobabyI
m notnay
eshedeser
ves
bet
ter
.Idon’
tdeser
veanyofy
ou.
”
“
Thi
sisbul
l
shi
t!
”
“
Babycal
m down”
“
Don’
ttel
lmet
ocal
m down!
!!It
oldy
ou
t
ost
ayawayf
rom mebuty
oudi
dn’
tnow
y
ouar
etel
l
ingmeIdeser
vebet
tert
he
dayaf
tery
ouf
uckedme!Ori
sthatwhat
y
ouwant
edv
ele?
”Ichuckl
eandwi
pes
myt
ear
svi
gor
ousl
y
“
Baby
..
”
“
Youmi
ssedt
hest
upi
dbl
i
ndgi
rl
’spussy
angi
thi
andl
i
keaf
ool
shei
sshef
all
for
y
ouandgi
vey
ouwhaty
ouwant
ed.My
GodInev
erl
ear
n!”Icr
yhet
ri
est
ohol
d
mebuty
ankhi
m of
f
“
Baby
”Hesay
swi
thacr
yingv
oice
“
Takemehomepl
ease”
“
Mir
a…”
“
Takemehome!
!!
”Hedoesn’
tneedme
t
osayi
tfort
hehundr
edt
imes.Oncewe
ar
ri
veathomeheof
fer
stogui
demebut
I
’
mfi
ne.Iwi
l
lseemywayi
n.Iknowt
his
houseIdon’
tal
way
sneedadogorcane.
Ihav
ebeenl
i
vingwi
tht
hisdi
sabi
l
ity
si
ncef
orev
er.
“
Ishoul
dhav
eknownt
hishasal
way
s
beenaboutmypussyt
oyouIdon’
t
knowwhatIwast
hinki
ngwhenIt
hought
y
oumeantev
ery
thi
ngy
ousai
dev
en
aboutaski
ngmet
omar
ryy
ou.I
fthat
howy
ouf
oundj
oybybr
eaki
ngpeopl
e’
s
hear
tjustknowt
hatt
hist
imeIwon’
t
al
l
owy
out
obr
eakmeapar
t.
”Imakemy
wayi
nthehouse
“
Hawuuphi
umf
anant
ombaz
ana”
“
Idon’
tknow”
“
Whatdoy
oumeany
oudon’
tknow?She
l
efty
oual
lal
onewhenshesai
dyoucan
l
eav
eRockybehi
nduphuz
il
eyi
ni!
!”
“
I’
mfi
negogoIj
ustwantt
osl
eep”
“
Youwer
ecr
yingwhatdi
dshedo”
“
Nexgogo”
“
Okaysi
scomel
et’
smehel
ptoy
our
bedr
oom”
.Shet
akesmyhandl
eadi
ng
met
omybedr
oom.Icur
lmy
sel
fint
oa
bal
lont
hebedandwai
tforhert
owal
k
out
.Themomentshecl
osest
hedoorI
cr
ymyl
ungsout
.Hepl
ayedy
ouagai
n
becausey
ouar
east
upi
dbl
i
ndgi
rl
!Hi
s
scentf
il
lsmynost
ri
lsasheenv
elopes
mei
nhi
sar
ms
“
Ibr
oughtKamar
iashe’
swi
thgogoi
n
t
heki
tchen.Gogot
oldmey
ouar
enot
wel
lIt
houghtIshoul
dcheckupony
ou”
Idon’
trepl
ybutr
eleaseal
lmypai
n
t
hrought
ear
s.
“
Don’
tcr
ymt
wanaI
m her
eokayandI
wi
l
lal
way
sbeher
enomat
terwhat
”He
ki
ssesmyf
oreheadandr
ockmeback
andf
ort
hli
keababy
.
CHAPTER50(
unedi
ted&snack-
nyana)

“
Ilov
eyou”Hecol
l
apseonmepant
ing,
wear
efor
eheadt
ofor
ehead,
noset
o
noseandbr
eat
hingt
hesameai
r.Ihol
d
t
hebackofhi
sneckandki
sshi
m
passi
onat
ely
.Ev
eryt
imeandev
eryday
f
eel
sli
kei
t’
sfort
hef
ir
stt
ime.I
fIcoud
ex
presshowmuchdoIl
ovet
hismani
n
wor
dsabookwoul
dn’
tbeenough.I
t’
s
hav
en’
tbeeneasybutt
hel
ovewehav
e
f
oreachot
herconquer
sital
l
.Her
oll
s
ov
erandpul
l
smet
ohi
schest,
wr
appi
nghi
sar
msar
oundme.Il
ove
howper
fect
lyIf
iti
nhi
sar
ms.
“
Uthat
hengamawal
akodamaNkosi
”
“
Honeypl
easedon’
ttel
lmey
ousay
Khuz
ani
wasr
ightf
orat
tacki
ngmy
son?
”
“
Lwandl
edi
srespect
shi
m baby
”
“
Sti
l
lthatdoesn’
titmakei
tri
ghtf
orhi
m
t
oat
tackmychi
l
d.”
“
Buthe’
sri
ghtaboutLwandl
ethi
sboyi
s
br
eaki
ngev
erygi
rl
’shear
tlef
tri
ghtand
cent
eri
t’
snotr
ight
”
“
Lwandl
eacknowl
edgehi
smi
stakes
kant
ini
funaenz
enj
ani
umt
anami
baki
thi
?
Hei
mpr
egnat
edNandi
andhewas
al
way
sther
eforherf
eedi
ngher
cr
avi
ngsandwhent
heyl
ostt
hebabyhe
di
dn’
tjustdi
tchedherst
randedbuthe
beggedy
out
ogi
veheraj
ob.Hemade
sur
ethatNandi
issecur
edandhappy
.
Khuz
ani
ist
heonet
hatputmysoni
nto
pl
ayi
ngwi
thMi
ra’
sfeel
i
ngs.I
’
m not
say
ingLwandl
eisr
ightbecausehehad
achoi
cet
oref
usebutwhatI
’
mtr
yingt
o
sayi
fsomeoney
oul
ookupt
oist
heone
t
hati
steachi
ngy
ouev
ilt
hingsy
ouar
e
boundt
otur
noutex
act
lyl
i
ket
hem.
Khuz
ani
taughtmysont
hatr
evengei
s
t
her
ightt
hingt
odoandal
otofl
i
ves
wer
edest
roy
edi
nthenameof“
rev
enge”
Asf
orAy
andaIf
eel
sor
ryherbutas
muchasi
tbr
eaksherhear
tLwandl
eis
doi
ngt
her
ightt
hingt
olethergo
becauseshedeser
vesbet
ter
,someone
whowi
l
llov
eherwhol
ehear
tedl
yisn’
the
r
ect
if
yinghi
smi
stakesbyl
ett
ingt
hegi
rl
go?
”
“
Iheary
oudar
li
ngbuti
tdoesn’
tchange
t
hef
actt
hathekeepshur
ti
ngt
hesegi
rl
s.
Youcan’
tmakesamemi
stakesov
erand
ov
erj
ustbecausey
ouwi
l
lrect
if
ythem
att
heendoft
heday
.Nowhe’
smov
ing
t
oMi
ra”
“
Khuz
ani
hasani
nfl
uenceonhow
Lwandl
ebehav
est
owar
dswomen.
They
’real
way
stoget
herandt
hei
rbond
i
samaz
ing.Lwandl
elooksupt
o
Khuz
ani
andhet
hinkswhathe’
suncl
eis
doi
ngi
sri
ght
.Aspar
ent
swedot
hings
babyandf
orgett
hatwear
eour
chi
l
dren’
srol
emodel
s.”
“
Ihav
en’
tbeenagoodhusbandandt
his
al
soaf
fect
edourson’
sbehav
ior
t
owar
dsf
emal
es.I
fIwasagood
ex
ampl
etohi
m hewoul
dn’
tbel
i
ket
his.I
f
ail
edmysonZot
hisal
lmyf
aul
t”Il
ook
upathi
m buthi
sey
esar
ecl
osed
“
Stopbei
nghar
dony
our
sel
f,i
t’
sbeen
y
ear
snowst
handwasami
.”
“
It
’snoteasyasy
ousayZoi
t’
sst
il
lfeel
s
l
i
key
est
erday
.”
“
Youneedf
orgi
vey
our
sel
fsot
haty
ou
canmov
eon.Dwel
l
ingont
hepastt
hat
can’
tbeer
asedwi
l
lst
eal
yourj
oymy
l
ove.Youneedt
oleti
tgonowand
r
emembert
hatt
hef
utur
eisy
eti
nyour
power
.Il
ovey
ousomuchandIwoul
dn’
t
t
radey
ouf
orany
thi
ngi
nthi
swor
ld.I
needy
out
oleti
tgopl
easedoi
tforme
andourchi
l
dren”Hebl
i
nkshi
sey
es
openandt
heyar
ebl
oodshotr
ed.
“
Idon’
tknowwhatIwoul
dbewi
thout
y
ouZoy
ouar
eanamaz
ingwi
feIcoul
d
ev
eraskf
or.Youar
ether
easonIwant
t
obet
hebestmanIcoul
dIev
erbe
becausey
oudeser
vemor
ethenj
usta
bestman.Thanky
ousomuchf
ort
he
wonder
ful
wif
eyouar
etomeand
wonder
ful
mom y
ouar
etoourchi
l
dren.
Wi
thouty
ouwear
elost
.Il
ovey
ouso
muchmunt
unz
awami
”Ismi
l
e
Hepul
l
smecl
osert
ohi
sbodyand
ki
ssesme.
“
I’
m st
arv
ing”Hemur
mur
sagai
nstmy
l
i
ps
“
Buty
ouat
efewhour
sagobaby
”
“
Youknowhowy
ourpussymakes
ev
ery
thi
ngdi
sappearonmyst
omach”I
gi
ggl
e
“
Iwi
l
lgof
ixy
ousomet
hing”Ir
oll
outof
bedhespanksmyasscausi
ngt
ogi
ggl
e.
Ipul
lmyr
obeandsl
i
dei
ntohi
spushi
ns
t
henmakemywaydownst
air
s.Isee
Lwandl
e’
sdooraj
ar,
whendi
dhecome
back?Iknockonceandpusht
hedoor
open.He’
ssl
eepi
ngsky
war
d.Il
ookat
hi
m Icanseehi
sey
eli
dsar
eswol
l
enI
’
m
al
armedt
hathewascr
yingmyey
es
t
rav
elt
othebedsi
det
abl
eandIsee
whi
tepowderi
nasmal
lpackmyhear
t
ski
psabeat
.
“
Lwandl
e”Ishakehi
m buthe’
snot
waki
ngup
“
NononoLwandl
edon’
tdot
hist
ome
pl
ease!
”Ishakehi
mroughl
y
“
Lwandl
evuka!
!”I
’
m cr
yinghy
ster
ical
l
y
“
Lwandl
e!!
”Hebl
i
nkshi
sey
esopenand
l
ooksatmeconf
used
“
Mom what
’sgoi
ngonwhyar
eyou
cr
ying?
”
“
Ithoughty
ou.
..
Isaw…”Ist
utt
erand
t
aket
hepacketofwhi
tepowderont
he
bedsi
det
abl
e
“
Pleaset
ell
mey
ouar
enotbackon
dr
ugs”Hel
ooksatmeandhi
sey
es
gl
i
stenwi
tht
ear
s
“
Lwandl
eno!Uy
enz
akanj
ani
int
oenj
ena.
Wear
eher
ebabyf
ory
oul
etusi
n
what
evert
hati
sgoi
ngondon’
ttur
nto
dr
ugspl
easeI
’
m beggi
ngy
ou”
“
Iwant
edt
omom butIcoul
dn’
tdoi
t.I
won’
tli
eIboughti
ttonumbt
hepai
nbut
Icoul
dn’
tdoi
t”Hebur
sti
ntot
ear
soh
mypoorboy
.Isl
i
denex
ttohi
minbed
hol
dhi
minmyar
msashewai
l
sli
kea
babybr
eaki
ngmyhear
twi
theachsob
escapi
ngoutofhi
smout
h.
“
Babywhat
’sgoi
ngont
hatmakesy
out
o
t
urnt
odr
ugsagai
naf
tery
ouhav
e
f
oughtsohar
dtopul
li
tthr
ough”Ineed
t
oknowonemi
nut
emyboyi
shappy
especi
all
ysi
nceMi
rai
sbackt
henex
t
he’
scr
awl
i
ngbackt
othatdar
ktohol
e
hef
oughthar
dtocl
i
mboutof
“
Kubuhl
unguMama”(
it
shur
tsmama)
“
Wher
ebaby
?Yournose?
”
“
Noi
nmyhear
tIbr
okeupwi
thMi
raand
i
thur
tsmor
ethenwhenshewas
mi
ssi
ng”
“
OhLwandl
ewhydi
dyoudot
hatf
or?
”
“
Iwasdoi
ngt
her
ightt
hingmom.She
doesn’
tdeser
veme,
shedeser
vesbet
ter
t
henacr
uel
egocent
ri
cbast
ardt
hatwi
l
l
br
eakherhear
t.I
t’
swhatI
’
m capabl
eof
mom whi
chi
sbr
eaki
ngpeopl
e’
shear
tI
don’
twantt
hatnomor
e.Ir
atherdi
e
i
nsi
deandwat
chherhappyi
nadi
stance
t
henal
l
owhert
ohav
emeback”ohmy
boy
“
AhkodaLwandl
e..
.wer
eyout
woback
t
oget
herv
ele?
”
“
Yesmom Iev
enaskedhert
omar
ryher
butIt
oldhert
onotr
ushany
thi
ng.Iwas
wi
l
li
ngt
owai
tev
enf
ordecadesf
orher
t
ober
eady
.Il
ovehermom z
ingangi
dida
z
onkei
zi
ntoemhl
abeni
kodwaut
hando
engi
nal
oforl
eyant
okaz
isoz
eli
ngudi
de
l
uzohl
ezi
lumi
ngunaphakade.
”Oht
hat
’s
sobeaut
if
ul
“
Butbabybr
eaki
ngupwi
thheraf
ter
mar
ri
agepr
oposal
wil
lbr
eakhermor
e!”
“
Iwasdoi
ngt
her
ightt
hingnj
ena,
Ihav
e
beensel
fi
sht
hinki
ngf
ormy
sel
fonl
yand
nev
erconsi
der
edot
herpeopl
e’
s
f
eel
i
ngs.
”Khuz
ani
isconf
usi
ngmyboy
“
Iheary
ousweet
hear
tbutdi
dyou
consi
der
edwhatshesay
saboutt
his?
Doesshet
hinky
oudon’
tdeser
veher
?”
“
Mir
aisbl
i
ndedbyl
oveIhadt
omake
t
hisdeci
sionf
orher
.”
“
Ohboyy
ouar
ebr
eaki
ngmyhear
tar
e
y
ousur
ethi
swhaty
ouwant
?Youdon’
t
hav
etobr
eakupwi
thherj
ustbecause
y
out
hinkshedoesn’
tdeser
vey
ou.I
under
standy
ouhav
emadeal
otof
mi
stakesandt
hatmakesy
ouhuman
hencey
ouar
elear
ningf
rom t
hem.You
can’
tdenyy
our
sel
fhappi
nessbecause
ofy
ourpastmi
stakes.Nandi
for
gav
e
y
ouandy
out
ri
edy
ourbestt
odor
ight
byher
.Mi
raf
orgav
eyouandt
ooky
ou
back.Ay
andanay
east
imegoesonshe
wi
l
lunder
standt
haty
oudi
dheraf
avor
byl
ett
inghergo.Tel
lmewhydi
dyou
mov
eont
oAy
anda”
“
Itf
eltl
i
kei
twast
heonl
ythi
ngIcando
t
oseet
hatIhav
emov
edonf
rom Mi
ra.
Ther
ewer
enoday
spassedwi
thoutme
t
hinki
ngaboutherandi
tki
l
lsmebey
ond
mom.Idesper
atel
yneededsomet
hing
t
oconv
incemet
hatIhav
emov
edon
f
rom her
”Ishoul
dhav
eknownt
hiswas
hi
mtr
yingt
opr
ovet
oust
hathehas
mov
eonandhewi
l
lnev
ersnor
tdr
ugs
agai
n.I
twashi
mtr
yingt
omakeusnot
wor
ryabouthi
m andt
hinkhe’
sfi
ne
whi
l
edeepi
nsi
dehewasst
il
lfi
ght
ing
hi
semot
ions.Ishoul
d’v
eknown,
how
di
dImi
sst
his?

“
What
’sgoi
ngont
alkt
ome”Hesay
s
car
essi
ngmycheek
“
I’
mfi
nemal
u..
.Mpendul
o”
“
It
’st
hatmor
oncal
l
edLwandl
eisn’
tit
?”
“
Whydoy
out
hinkhe’
stheonet
hat
mademecr
y”
“
Becauset
hatwhathe’
scapabl
eof
whi
chi
sbr
eaki
ngy
ourhear
t.FuckIhat
e
t
hatboy
!”
“
Atl
easty
enahedi
dn’
tdest
roymy
r
elat
ionshi
pwi
thmyoneandonl
y
f
ri
end”Ihearhi
m br
eat
hingl
oudl
yashi
s
gr
ipt
ight
enonmybody
“
Isai
dI’
m sor
rymt
wanapl
easef
orgi
ve
me”
“
Iwantmysi
sterbackt
henwewi
l
ltal
k
aboutf
orgi
vi
ngeachot
her
”
“
Iwi
l
ltal
ktoherokayIpr
omi
sey
ou”
“
Heyheywhatar
eyoudoi
ngi
nmy
daught
er’
sbedr
oom !Youwantt
o
i
mpr
egnat
eheragai
n!!
”Mom r
oar
sin
angergoshI
’
m sonotupf
ordr
ama.
“
Gogot
oldmeMi
rai
sn’
twel
lI
t
hought
..
…”
“
Yout
houghty
oushoul
dcomet
o
comf
ortherwi
thy
ourst
inki
ngdi
ck!
!”
“
MrsKI
’
m si
ckandt
ir
edofy
oui
nsul
ti
ng
me!I
’
m sor
ryt
hatImadeherpr
egnant
buty
ouhav
etost
opt
reat
ingmel
i
ke
t
rashbecausenot
hingwi
l
lchange.Ar
g!”
Hel
et’
sgoofmeandIhearhi
m wal
ki
ng
out
.
“
Yini
ubuf
ebeMi
raev
eryt
imewheny
ou
ar
egoi
ngt
hroughsomet
hingy
ouhav
e
t
oopeny
ourl
egsf
orSox
!”Thathi
t
homeandIcoul
dn’
thel
pmy
sel
f
“
Idon’
tbet
rayf
ami
l
yandsl
eepwi
tht
hei
r
husbandsl
i
key
ou!
”
“
Don’
tyoudar
etal
ktomel
i
ket
hat
!”
“
Whaty
ougonnado?Sl
apme?I
t’
swhat
y
oudot
hebestv
elemommydear
est
.
Comeandsl
apmeIdon’
tcar
e.I
’
mti
red
ofy
ouri
nsul
tsandcl
aps!I
t’
sokayf
or
y
out
oinsul
tandsl
apmej
ustbecause
y
ouar
emymot
hert
heny
ousayny
ory
ny
oryanddot
hesamet
hingagai
n!
Ngi
khat
hel
eNokubongay
ezwaI
’
mfed
up!Justonemi
stakeIwi
l
lal
way
sbea
whor
einy
ourey
es?It
houghtnoonei
s
per
fecti
nthi
swor
ld.It
houghtwel
ear
n
f
rom ourmi
stakes.I
fyoumyown
mot
heri
sjudgi
ngmewhatcanIex
pect
f
rom t
hewor
ldbuty
ouknowwhatI
don’
tgi
veaf
uck!I
’
mti
redofy
oupeopl
e
t
reat
ingmel
i
keI
’
m nohuman!Yi
nii
s
becauseI
’
m bl
i
nd?Guesswhat?Bl
i
nd
st
upi
dgi
rli
sfedupnow!Noi
nsul
tsnor
whaty
oudot
omewi
l
ldest
royme
any
mor
e.Iwi
l
lst
il
lri
se!
”I’
m ex
pect
inga
hugeasl
apbutI
’
mreadyshecansl
ap
meI
’
m get
ti
nguset
oherv
iol
ence
t
endenci
es.Iheart
hedoorcl
osi
ngoh
di
dshej
ustwal
kedout
?That
’st
hef
ir
st.
IknowIshoul
dn’
thav
etobet
hat
di
srespect
ful
she’
smymot
heraf
teral
l
butI
’
mti
redokayI
’
mti
redofmymom’
s
deget
oryr
emar
ksasi
fshe’
sper
fect
.
She’
sal
way
stheonet
ospi
tshi
tatme
whenev
erImadeami
stakei
t’
shur
ts
y
ouknow.NoI
’
m notsay
ingshe
shoul
dn’
trepr
imandmebutmom’
s
wor
dsar
ever
yhar
shandt
heycutdeep.
Sher
eal
l
ythi
nkIwi
l
lsl
eepwi
thSox
whi
l
ehe’
sengagedt
omybestf
ri
end?
Sher
eal
l
ythi
nkIwantt
ofal
lpr
egnant
agai
naf
tert
hepai
nIwentt
hrough
dur
ingmypr
egnancy
.Ial
l
owmyt
ear
sto
f
all
eff
ort
lessl
yI’
m goi
ngt
opoural
lmy
t
ear
stodaybecauseIdon’
twant
Lwenkosi
ormom t
obet
her
easonf
or
myt
ear
stomor
row.Ihav
egi
vent
hem
somuchpoweri
nmyl
i
feespeci
all
y
Lwenkosi
,thi
sti
meIwon’
tal
l
owhi
mto
br
eakmeapar
t.

Icanst
il
lhearherwor
dsi
nmyear
s
sur
pri
singl
yI’
m notangr
yatherbutI
’
m
hur
t.Ihav
ebeenar
eal
l
yhor
ri
blemot
her
andI
’
m scar
edmydaught
erhas
r
eachedherbr
eaki
ngpoi
nt.I
t’
sthenex
t
mor
ningI
’
m meet
ingZowear
egoi
ngt
o
di
scusst
hepar
ty.
“
Hey
”Wehug,
herey
esar
eredIknow
f
orsur
ethatshewascr
ying.
“
Isev
ery
thi
ngokay
”
“
Yesl
et’
ssi
tdown”wesi
tdownweat
muggandbeanbyt
heway
“
Hav
eyouor
der
edany
thi
ng”Iask
“
Noi
mfi
ney
oucanor
der
”Ical
lthe
wai
terandor
derapi
eceofchocol
ate
cakeandcof
fee.
“
What
’sgoi
ngonZo”
“
Lwandl
eal
mostr
elapsedy
est
erday
”
“
OhZoI
’
m sor
ry”It
akeherhandsi
n
mi
neandsqueez
ethem
“
I’
m scar
edBongaIdon’
twantl
osemy
son”
“
Iknowsi
sIknow.
.whathappened”
“
Idi
dn’
tev
enknowt
hatt
heywer
eback
t
oget
herwi
thMi
rasohebr
okeupwi
th
herbecausehi
suncl
emadehi
m bel
i
eve
t
hathedoesn’
tdeser
veMi
ra”
“
OhIsee”Shel
ooksupatme
“
Youal
sot
hinkt
hesame?
”
“
Noofcour
senotZoy
ouknowIl
ove
y
oursonf
ormydaught
erbutr
ightnow
Lwandl
eisnotwhatMi
raneed.Hehasa
gi
rl
fr
iendont
opoft
hat
”
“
Hebr
okeupwi
thAy
andaf
orMi
ra.He
l
ovesherBongaandKhuz
ani
is
conf
usi
ngmyson.Het
hinksbr
eaki
ng
upwi
thMi
rai
sther
ightt
hingt
odo.I
don’
tthi
nki
tis.Mi
rawi
l
lnev
ert
rust
Lwandl
ewi
thherhear
tev
eragai
nand
mysonwi
l
lal
way
sbemi
ser
abl
ewi
thout
hi
sdol
l
face.Yest
erdayhemanaget
o
f
ightt
heur
gewhatwi
l
lhappen
t
omor
row?Whati
fhef
ail
stof
ightt
he
ur
geoneoft
heseday
s.”Shewi
pesher
t
ear
svi
gor
ousl
y
“
Iremembert
hedayIf
oundhi
m
hel
plessl
yIt
houghtIhav
elosthi
m.The
i
magei
sst
il
lpl
ast
eredi
nmymi
nd
Bonga.Ihav
ereal
i
zedt
hatev
ersi
nce
Khuz
ani
int
roducedMi
rai
nLwandl
e’
s
l
i
femyboyhav
ebeent
hroughal
ot.
Thei
rlov
eisbeaut
if
uly
eti
t’
stox
ic.I
can’
taf
for
dtol
oseanot
hersonBonga
andIwi
l
ldowhat
everi
t’
stakesf
ormy
son’
swel
l
bei
ng.It
hinki
t’
sbet
terwecut
t
iesi
twi
l
lhel
phi
mtof
orgetaboutMi
ra
compl
etel
y.
”Ibl
i
nkmyey
es
super
fl
uousl
y
“
What
?”
“
I’
m sor
rysi
sit
’st
heonl
yway
.Heonl
y
gotf
ewepi
sodesshoot
ingt
hathe
needst
odoaf
tert
hatwear
emov
ingt
o
CapeTownf
orgood”
“
Zonopl
easedon’
tdot
his”
“
Ilov
eyouBongay
ouknowt
hatbutmy
soncomesf
ir
st.
”
“
Zoy
ouj
ustgonnaf
orgetaboutmej
ust
l
i
ket
hat
?It
houghtwear
esi
ster
s.I
t
houghty
ousai
dyouwi
l
lal
way
sbewi
th
menomat
terwhat
.It
houghty
ousai
d
not
hingwi
l
ltakef
ormet
ogetr
idof
y
ou.
”
“
IknowandI
’
m sor
rybutIhopey
ou
under
standsi
s.Thi
sishar
dformet
oo.
”
“
Soy
ouar
eleav
ingme?Whatam I
goi
ngt
odowi
thouty
ou?YouknowI
hav
enooneex
cepty
ou”
“
Youhav
eyourmom,
Khuz
ani
andMi
ra”
“
YouknowwhatImeanZopl
ease
consi
dert
his.I
’
m beggi
ngy
ou”
“
I’
m sor
ryandIl
ovey
ou”Sheget
sup
andki
ssesmycheekbef
orewal
ki
ngout
l
eav
ingmenumb.Iaskf
ort
akeaway
andpayt
henl
eav
e.Myhear
tisbr
eaki
ng
asmuchasIt
ryt
oignor
eit
.ZoandI
hav
ebecomemor
ethenj
ustf
ri
ends.
She’
sli
keasi
sterInev
erhad.I
under
standwhyshehav
etodot
hisbut
i
tdoesn’
thur
tanyl
ess.Iwi
pemyt
ear
s
wi
tht
hebackofhandasIdr
ivehome.I
f
indmom,
Mir
aandKamar
iaeat
ing
br
eakf
ast
.
“
Sani
bonani
”Theygr
eetmebackIj
oin
t
hem.
“
Goodt
hingy
ouar
ebackIhav
e
somet
hingt
otel
lyouguy
s”Mi
rasay
s.
“
Yes”
“
Ihav
edeci
dedt
ogobackt
oKeny
awi
th
mom CabaandBabJacobIhav
e
r
eal
i
zedt
hatKeny
awaswaybet
tert
hen
Sout
hAf
ri
caatl
eastnowIknowt
hat
y
ouar
eal
i
ve.It
alkedt
oMpendul
oabout
Kamar
iaandhesai
dev
eryweekendhe
wi
l
lfl
ytoseehi
sdaught
ersoev
ery
thi
ng
i
sset
”
CHAPTER51

Il
ookatherhopi
ngshe’
sjoki
ngbutno
she’
sdeadser
ious.OhNo,
she’
snot
l
eav
ingme,
notwhenIj
ustf
oundher
.I
al
readyl
ost4y
ear
sofherl
i
feaswel
las
mygr
anddaught
er’
sandnowshewant
t
ogobackt
oKeny
a?
“
Youar
ejoki
ngr
ight
?”
“
Nomom,
I’
m notj
oki
ng.Iwi
l
lnev
erj
oke
aboutsomet
hingasser
iousast
his”
“
Butwhynunuz
ayouj
ustgotback,
you
can’
tleav
eus”mom say
slooki
ngv
ery
concer
ned
“
I’
m notdy
inggogo,
I’
mjustmov
ingt
o
anot
hercount
ry.Iwi
l
lcomev
isi
ty’
al
l”
“
Babycomeon,
Ispent4y
ear
scr
ying
f
ory
out
hinki
ngt
hewor
stt
hatcoul
d
hav
ehappenedt
oyou,
nowy
ouwantt
o
l
eav
eme?Pl
easedon’
tleav
eme,
I’
m
sor
ryf
orwhatIsai
dyest
erday
.Don’
tgo
Mi
ra,
Iwi
l
ldi
ewi
thouty
oupl
ease.I
al
readyl
ost4y
ear
sofy
ourl
i
fe,
please
don’
tpuni
shme,
I’
m sor
ry”
“
Mom I
’
m notdoi
ngt
hist
ohur
tyoubutI
hav
etodoi
tformysani
ty.Sout
hAf
ri
ca
i
snott
reat
ingmegoodmama.I
’
m si
ck
ofi
ttoget
herwi
thi
t’
speopl
eatl
easti
n
Keny
aitwaswaybet
ter
”
“
BabyI
’
m sor
rypl
easef
orgi
veme.I
knowI
’
m ahor
ri
blemom j
ustgi
veme
onechancet
ofi
xthi
s,I
’
m beggi
ngy
ou”
“
Mom pl
ease…”
“
PleasemyMi
racl
e,Iwoul
ddoany
thi
ng
f
ory
out
ost
ayj
ustt
ell
mewhatshoul
dI
do?Ican’
tlosey
ouagai
npl
ease”
“
Youar
enotl
osi
ngme,
I’
mjustmov
ing
backt
oKeny
awewi
l
lcont
acteach
ot
her
”
“
NoIwanty
ouher
e!Youbel
ongher
e
wi
thmesweet
hear
t,don’
tdot
hist
o
me.
”Igetupandwal
ktohersi
det
hen
kneel
bef
oreher
“
Pleasedon’
tgo”Iwhi
sperasIhol
dher
hands
“
Ify
ouwantmet
oendt
hingswi
th
Khuz
ani
,Iwi
l
ldoi
tbaby
,it
’sokayj
ust
t
ell
mewhatIshoul
ddof
ory
ounott
o
l
eav
eme”
“
Mom…”
“
Mir
angi
yakucel
a”Icanthel
pmyt
ear
s
now,
theyar
est
reami
ngdownmyf
ace.
Thet
houghtofl
osi
ngheri
ssl
i
cingmy
hear
tint
oti
nypi
eces.
“
Mom Idon’
tcar
ewhati
shappeni
ng
bet
weeny
ouandy
ourboy
fri
end.Idon’
t
wanty
out
oleav
ehi
m”
“
Buty
oudon’
tlov
eust
oget
herandI
knowi
t’
soneoft
her
easony
ouar
e
goi
ng.Pl
easebabygi
rlgi
vemeachance
t
ofi
xthi
s.Ipr
omi
sedy
out
hatnot
hing
wi
l
lev
ercomebet
weenusagai
n.I
fI
hav
etol
ethi
m goi
t’
sfi
ne”sheheav
esa
si
gh
“
Mamay
oudontgeti
t,doy
ou?
”
“
Thenenl
i
ght
enmesweet
hear
tpl
ease”
“
Idon’
twanty
out
oletuncl
eKgoi
fhe
makesy
ouhappyI
’
m al
sohappyandI
’
m
v
erygr
atef
ult
ohi
mforr
euni
ti
ngusand
al
sof
indi
ngmydaught
erhowev
erI
hav
en’
tfor
got
tenwhathedi
d.Ican’
tjust
l
eti
tgoj
ustl
i
ket
hat
.Idon’
twantt
ofi
nd
my
sel
finv
olv
edi
nyourr
elat
ionshi
pli
keI
di
dwi
thKhumal
obecausehonest
lyI
’
m
par
tl
ybl
amedf
orwhathappened.I
’
m
t
heonewhoi
ntr
oducedt
hesepeopl
ein
ourl
i
vessodowhat
evert
hatmakesy
ou
happywi
thwhoev
ery
ouwantt
oasl
ong
asy
ouar
ehappy
”
“
Yourhappi
nessi
smyhappi
ness
Mi
racl
eify
ouar
enothappyt
henI
’
m not
happy
.Iunder
standandIdon’
tbl
ame
y
oubutIwi
shy
oucoul
dgi
vehi
ma
chancehe’
sreal
l
yagoodmanbaby
”
“
Youar
etheonewhowantmet
ogi
ve
hi
m achancenothi
m st
opaski
ngmet
o
gi
vehi
m achancewhenhedoesn’
t
car
e”
“
That
’snott
ruebabyhecar
es”
“
Nohedoesn’
tmama,
ifcar
eshe
woul
dn’
twantust
ojustcar
ryonl
i
ke
not
hinghappened.
”
“
Iwi
l
ltal
ktohi
m babyandI
…”
“
Nodon’
tmom,
It’
scool
.”
“
Pleasedon’
tgo,
I’
m sor
ryabout
y
est
erday
”
“
Ifor
giv
eyoubutI
’
m st
il
ll
eav
ing”
“
Mir
apl
easeI
’
m sor
ry,
don’
tdot
hist
o
me”
“
Itol
dyouI
’
m notdoi
ngt
hist
ohur
tyouI
wantpi
eceofmi
ndokayandKeny
ais
t
hecount
ryt
hatwi
l
lgi
vemet
hat
.”
“
Youar
ebei
ngsel
fi
shkodanunuz
ayour
mom wi
l
lbemi
ser
abl
ewi
thouty
ou!You
wanthert
odr
inkal
cohol
agai
n?”Mi
ra
chuckl
es
“
Somet
imesy
ouhav
etobesel
fi
shgogo
f
ory
ourowngood.Ican’
tst
ayher
eand
l
i
stent
omom’
sdeget
oryr
emar
ksev
ery
si
ngl
emi
stakeImake.Asmymot
herI
ex
pecthert
ocomf
ortmeandgui
deme
t
other
ightpat
hnoti
nsul
tme.Iknow
weal
lmakemi
stakesbutmom keep
doi
ngt
hesamet
hingov
erandov
er
agai
naf
tersheaskedf
orf
orgi
veness.
Thewor
dst
hatIwi
l
lnev
erf
orget“
stupi
d
bl
i
ndgi
rl
”WhenIhear
dthem t
hef
ir
st
t
imef
rom Lwenkosi
theyhur
tmebut
t
rustmet
hatwasbet
tert
hanhear
ing
t
hem bei
ngconf
ir
medbymyownmy
mot
her
.”shewi
peshert
ear
svi
gor
ousl
y
wi
tht
hebackofherhands
“
YouknowwhatIhat
ethemosti
sthat
t
heyhav
epowerov
erme.Ev
eryt
ime
whenIf
ail
todosomet
hingorbei
ng
pl
ayedatIal
way
sremembert
hose
wor
dsandIseemy
sel
fasar
eal
l
yst
upi
d
bl
i
ndgi
rl
.Inev
ert
houghtIwi
l
lsayt
his
butIwi
shy
ouabor
tedme,
what
'st
he
useofhav
ingast
upi
dbl
i
nddaught
er.
Cabanganj
ethepai
nyouendur
ed
dur
ingpr
egnancyaswel
lasKhumal
o’s
abusef
orabl
i
ndst
upi
dgi
rl
.Int
oe-
usel
essnj
e,awhor
eont
opoft
hatwho
sl
eepswi
thol
dmen.I
’
m sor
ryt
hatI
’
m
nott
hedaught
ery
oudeser
ve,
I’
m sor
ry
t
hatI
’
m bl
i
nd,
I’
m sor
ryt
hatI
’
m st
upi
d,
I
’
m sor
ryt
hatI
’
m awhor
eandI
’
m sor
ry
t
hatIcan’
tchangeany
thi
nghenceI
bet
tergo.Iwon’
tkeepupwi
thy
our
per
fect
ionex
pect
ati
onsbecauseI
’
m
onl
yhumanaf
teral
l
.”If
eel
myhear
t
shat
ter
ingbi
tbybi
tbyeachwor
dshe
sai
dandmyt
ear
sinv
olunt
ari
l
yfl
ow
downmyf
acel
i
keawat
erf
all
.WhatI
hav
edone!

-
“
10.
9.8.
7.6.
5.4.
3.2.
­1”Ihearabel
land
getupf
rom t
hef
loorpant
ing.Iwas
doi
ngpush-
upsIgr
abat
owel
andwi
pe
mysweat
yfacet
henmakemywayt
o
t
hedoor
.ThemomentIopeni
tshe
t
hrowsher
sel
finmyar
msandIhol
dher
t
ight
ly
“
Snookumswhat
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
She’
sleav
ingmeK,
justl
i
key
ousai
dI
wi
l
llosehert
otheMwangi
’
s,i
t’
s
happeni
ngnow”shebur
sti
ntoal
oud
cr
y.
“
Ohmysnookums,
I’
m sor
ry”Iscoopher
upandmakemywayt
othel
i
vingr
oom.
Isi
tdownont
hecouchandpul
lhert
o
myl
ap
“
Shhhdon’
tcr
y,wecanst
il
lfi
xthi
sjust
t
ell
mewhathappened”Isaybr
ushi
ng
herbackl
ordknowshowmuchI
t’
s
br
eaki
ngmyhear
ttoseehercr
ying.
“
Don’
tcr
ypl
ease”Iwi
pehert
ear
sand
pl
antki
ssesal
lov
erherf
acet
ryi
ngt
o
cal
m herdown.
“
Khul
umanami
”(Tal
ktome)shebl
i
nks
herbl
oodshedr
edey
esopenandl
ooks
atme.Icupherf
aceandki
ssherr
ed
nosecausi
nghert
ogi
ggl
esof
tl
y.
“
That
’swhatIwannahear
”shesmi
l
es
f
aint
lyandspi
nsar
oundt
ost
raddl
esme.
“
Mir
aismov
ingbackt
oKeny
awi
tht
he
Mwangi
’
s”
“
Whyi
sitbecauseofwhatIsai
d?”
“
Yest
hatt
oo,
ever
ythi
ngnj
eisamess,
I
can’
tlosemydaught
erK.Herhappi
ness
i
smi
neandr
ightnowshe’
snothappy
aboutourr
elat
ionshi
pshesay
sshe’
s
notov
erwhaty
oudi
dandIf
ull
y
under
stand.I
ttookmey
ear
sformet
o
f
orgi
vey
ou.Idi
dn’
tknowt
hatherand
Lwandl
ewer
ebackt
oget
herunt
ilZo
t
oldmet
odayt
hatLwandl
ebr
okeup
wi
thMi
rabecausey
ousai
dhedoesn’
t
deser
veher
.Zof
eel
sli
key
ouar
e
conf
usi
nghersonsot
heyar
eal
so
l
eav
ingandgoi
ngt
oCapeTown.
Lwandl
eal
mostr
elapsedy
est
erday
becauseoft
hebr
eakupsoZoi
scut
ti
ng
al
lti
eswi
thev
ery
thi
ngt
hatwi
l
lremi
nd
hersonofhi
spasti
ncl
udi
ngme.They
ar
eal
ll
eav
ingmeK,
am It
hatbad?
”My
hear
tsi
nks
“
Noy
ouar
enotbadsnookums,
Zoi
snot
t
hinki
ngst
rai
ghtshecan’
tjustcutt
ies
wi
thy
oubecauseLwandl
edoesn’
twant
t
oownupt
ohi
smi
stakes”
“
Idon’
twantt
olosemyf
ri
endandI
def
ini
tel
ydon’
twantt
olosemydaught
er.
Whyar
eweagai
nstt
hei
rrel
ati
onshi
p
v
ele?Whydon’
twel
ett
heki
dsbe?
”
“
Hay
iLwandl
ewi
l
lhur
tMi
ra!
”
“
Wedon’
tknowt
hatKhuz
ani
!Hel
oves
her
,thatboywentt
hroughal
otbecause
oft
hel
ovehehasf
orMi
ra.I
ttookhi
m4
y
ear
stof
inal
l
yseet
hathecanmov
eon
whi
chwasn’
ttr
uebecausei
t’
scl
ear
ly
t
hathest
il
ll
ovesher
”
“
Idon’
twantLwandl
enearMi
raf
ini
sh
andKl
aar
!”
“
ThenI
’
m notl
osi
ngmydaught
erov
er
y
ou.Ipr
omi
sedmy
sel
fthatIwi
l
lnev
er
l
etany
thi
ngcomebet
weenmydaught
er
andI
.”
“
Whatar
eyout
ryi
ngt
osayBonga”
“
Ican’
tdot
his,
Ilov
eyoubuti
fIhav
eto
choosebet
weeny
ouandher
.It
’sher
oneway
.”Ichuckl
e,Ican’
tbel
i
evet
his
“
Real
l
yar
ewebr
eaki
ngupbecauseof
ki
ds”
“
Oneoft
hoseki
dsi
smydaught
erand
whenshe’
snothappyI
’
m nothappy
”
“
Letmegopl
ease”
“
Youj
ustgonnagi
veuponusj
ustl
i
ke
t
hatBonga”
“
Kpl
easey
ouar
emaki
ngt
hishar
der
t
hani
tal
readyi
s.”Sheget
supf
rom me
andIgetupt
oo
“
Bongapl
ease.
”Ihol
dhercl
oset
ome
andshet
ri
est
owi
ggl
eher
sel
ffr
om my
embr
acebutIhol
dheri
npl
ace
“
Ihav
eadaught
ert
hatIneedt
omake
sur
edoesnotl
eav
emesopl
easel
etme
go”If
reeherf
rom myembr
aceand
wat
chherl
eav
ingwi
thmyhear
t.
“
Fuck!
!!
”Igr
oani
nfr
ust
rat
ion.
“
Isi
tsaf
eformet
ocomei
n”Il
ookupat
hi
m.I
t’
smycousi
nSl
ova,
he’
sint
own
becauseIaskedhi
mtohel
pmet
rack
downKhany
i.
“
Comei
nman”weset
tl
eont
hecouch
“
Ijustsawy
ourwomancr
yinghowcan
y
oul
ethergoi
nthatst
atendoda”
“
Womenar
emel
odr
amat
icSl
ovay
err
r!
”
“
Whathappened?
”
“
Sheendedourr
elat
ionshi
p,cany
ou
bel
i
eveher
?”
“
Butwhy
?”Iex
plai
ntohi
m ev
ery
thi
ng
t
hathappened.
“
Dower
eal
l
yhav
etobr
eakupbecause
Lwandl
edoesn’
twantt
oownupt
ohi
s
mi
stakeshay
imaan!
”
“
Ist
hischampnotadmi
tt
ingt
ohi
s
mi
stakes?
”
“
Hei
s”
“
Thenwhatdoy
ouwanthi
mtodo?
”
“
Tost
ophur
ti
ngt
hesegi
rl
s.”
“
Enl
i
ght
enme”It
ell
him ev
ery
thi
ng
“
Mmm IseebutIt
hinky
ouar
ebei
ng
har
donhi
m.Wasn’
thet
her
efort
hegi
rl
whenhei
mpr
egnat
edher
?Ev
enwhen
t
heyl
ostt
hebabyhemadesur
ethatt
he
gi
rlgetaj
obandi
ssecur
ed.Asf
ort
his
newgi
rlt
hewayIseei
t,t
heboywant
ed
conv
incehi
msel
fthathe’
sreal
l
yov
er
t
heonet
hatwasmi
ssi
ngnott
hati
twas
r
ightt
odot
hatbuti
thappenedandhe’
s
doi
ngt
her
ightt
hingbyl
ett
ingt
hegi
rlgo
andst
icki
ngt
otheonehel
oves.Yi
ni
i
nki
ngaphoKhuz
ani
?”
“
Idon’
twanthi
m nearMi
ra!
”
“
Why
?”
“
Becausehewi
l
lhur
ther
!”
“
Andy
ouknowt
hathow?I
fev
eni
fhe
doesar
elat
ionshi
psi
snotabedof
r
oses.Yi
ningat
hit
her
e’smor
etot
his?
”
Hel
ooksatme“
OhIseey
oudon’
twant
t
hem t
oget
hernowbecausey
ouar
eint
o
t
hemot
heroft
hegi
rl
”Igr
oan
“
It
’snotr
ightmananuncl
eandnephew
dat
ingmot
heranddaught
erwher
ehav
e
y
ouev
erhear
doft
hat
?”
“
Youdat
edt
hemot
herknowi
ngt
hat
y
ournephewl
ovest
hedaught
er"
“
Hewasnev
ersupposedt
ofal
lforheri
n
t
hef
ir
stpl
ace”
“
Sot
haty
ouwi
l
lfal
lfort
hemot
her
?Ay
kahl
endoday
ouar
ebei
ngunr
easonabl
e
r
ightnow.Uz
ifakekul
ent
owaz
ikahl
e.
Youshoul
dbewor
kingony
our
r
elat
ionshi
pwi
tht
hedaught
erespeci
all
y
i
fyouar
eser
iousabouthermot
her
becauset
hatwomanwi
l
lnev
erchoose
y
ouov
erherdaught
er.Asf
ory
our
nephewy
oumustal
sosi
tdownwi
th
hi
m andt
alkt
ohi
m gui
dehi
mtot
he
r
ightpat
h,he’
sst
il
laboy
,he’
sboundt
o
makemi
stakes.Thegoodt
hingi
she’
s
admi
tt
ingt
othem.Tel
lhi
myour
concer
nsabouthowhet
reat
syour
f
utur
est
epdaught
er.
”
“
ArgIhat
ethaty
ouar
esor
ightnow”He
l
aughs
“
Youhav
ebi
ggerpr
obl
emst
owor
ry
aboutmymany
oudon’
tneedt
his”Il
ook
athi
m
“
What
’sgoi
ngon”
“
Spi
deri
stheonet
hatt
ookKhany
i,she
di
dn’
tescapeonherown”
“
Skhumbuz
o!”
“
Yep”
“
Dammi
tIdi
dn’
tseet
hiscomi
ng!
”
“
I’
m wor
ri
edaboutwhatar
ethoset
wo
wi
l
lbeupt
otoget
her
,thi
sisnotgoodat
al
lKhuz
ani
”
“
Myf
ami
l
yisi
ndangerSl
ova”
“
Wehav
etot
ryandf
indoutwhatar
e
t
heyupt
oandst
ri
kef
ir
st”Iwon’
tli
eI’
m
scar
edasf
uck.Iai
n’
tnogangst
erand
her
eI’
m deal
i
ngwi
thadanger
ous
gangst
erandhe’
swaydanger
oust
han
Khumal
obecausehewast
heonewho
washandl
i
ngev
ery
thi
ngbehi
ndev
ery
ev
ildeedt
heydi
d.Howam Igoi
ngt
o
pr
otectmyf
ami
l
y?

Ihav
ebeent
hroughal
oti
nmyl
i
feandI
hav
emadebadchoi
cesbutIhav
ecome
t
oreal
i
zet
hatIhav
ebeenput
ti
ngpeopl
e
bef
oreme.Ihav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
omake
ot
herpeopl
ehappyatt
hecostofmy
happi
nessbutnowi
t’
sti
meIl
i
vef
or
my
sel
fandmydaught
eronl
y.Iwi
l
lnot
l
i
veupt
oany
one’
sex
pect
ati
onsandI
wi
l
ldef
ini
tel
ynotal
l
owany
onet
otake
mef
orgr
ant
edany
mor
e.Iwi
l
lnev
erbe
av
ict
im ofdecei
tormani
pul
ati
on.Ihav
e
adaught
ert
hatneedsmet
obesober
mi
ndedandf
reespi
ri
tedal
lti
me.
Speaki
ngofmydaught
erIhav
easked
Gogot
ohel
pmel
abel
hercl
othes,
shoes
aswel
lhert
oil
etr
ieswi
thBr
ail
l
elabel
s,
r
ubberbands,
but
tonsandsaf
epi
nsso
t
hatIcanbeabl
etot
akecar
eofmy
daught
eri
ndependent
ly.Iwantt
obe
abl
etobat
hher
,dr
essheranddo
ev
ery
thi
ngamot
herhasdof
orher
daught
er.
“
I’
m pr
oudofy
oununuz
aIl
i
kehowy
ou
l
ovey
ourdaught
er”Ismi
l
e
“
Thanky
ousomuchgogo”Il
ovehow
Gogoi
sobser
vantofev
ery
thi
ngIdoand
t
ell
mehowpr
oudshei
s.Mymom
har
dlynot
icewhenIdor
ightandwhenI
dowr
ongshe’
sthef
ir
stt
oinsul
tme.I
m
t
ir
edofheri
nsul
tsr
eal
l
ybecauseshe
keepsdoi
ngt
hesamet
hingov
erand
ov
eragai
n.Ihav
ecomet
oreal
i
zet
hat
ourr
elat
ionshi
pwi
l
lnev
erbet
hesame
agai
nit
’sbet
terwekeepdi
stancef
rom
eachot
herbef
oreIl
osemy
sel
f
compl
etel
y.I
’
mint
hepr
ocessofget
ti
ng
myl
i
fet
oget
herIdon’
tneedsuch
negat
iveener
gy.
“
Thi
sisherbodyl
oti
on”It
akei
tandput
oner
ubberband
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngmommy
”
“
I’
m mar
kingy
ourcl
othesandt
oil
etr
ies
sot
hati
twi
l
lbeeasyf
ormommyt
o
i
dent
if
ythem”
“
OkayIl
ovey
oumommy
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomymoonl
i
ghtgi
ve
mommyaki
ss”Ipur
semyl
i
psandf
eel
hert
inyhandscuppi
ngmyf
ace
“
Mmmhwaaamommy
”shepl
ant
sawet
ki
ssonmyl
i
ps
“
She’
sador
abl
e”Gogosay
s
“
Yeahshei
s”
“
Yourmom l
ovesy
ousweet
hear
t”
“
Somet
imesi
t’
sfeel
sli
keshedoesn’
t
l
oveme,
may
bei
fIwasn’
tbl
i
ndshe
woul
dhav
etr
eat
edmebet
ter
”
“
Ahnunuz
adon’
tsayt
haty
ourmom
l
ovesy
ouasy
ouar
e.Pl
easedon’
tgo”
“
I’
m sor
rygogoIhav
etol
eav
eIwi
l
l
comeandv
isi
thert
hatwayi
twoul
dbe
bet
terwewon’
thav
etof
ightev
ery
day
”
“
Butbabyy
ourmom wi
l
llosei
twi
thout
y
ou,
shewi
l
ldr
ownher
sel
ftoal
cohol
agai
n”
“
Ineedy
out
ounder
standt
hatI
’
m not
doi
ngt
hist
ohur
therbutI
thav
etobe
donef
ort
hesakeofmysani
ty.I
’
m
f
ight
ingdepr
essi
onasi
tisgogoIneed
peaceofmi
nd”
“
Ohnunuz
a..
.Cabangi
l
esai
dwhenar
e
y
’al
ll
eav
ing”
“
Thedayaf
tert
omor
row”
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oogogo.Iwi
l
lcomeandv
isi
t
y
out
oo”whenwear
edoneIpr
epar
eto
bat
hKamar
ia.Herf
atheri
scomi
ngt
o
pi
ckheruphe’
staki
nghert
otheZoo.
I
’
m sohappyt
hatt
heybondedso
qui
ckl
ysoIdon’
thav
etogowi
tht
hem
whenev
ermal
u..
.Mpendul
owant
sto
spendt
imewi
thhi
sdaught
er.OnceI
hav
epr
epar
edev
ery
thi
ngf
orherIbat
h
herf
ort
het
imeev
ersi
nceIgav
ebi
rt
hto
her
.Ican’
thel
pbutnot
icej
oyt
hatf
il
ls
myhear
tint
hismoment
.
“
Youar
edoi
nggoodnunuz
akagogo
onewoul
dn’
tev
ent
ell
it’
syourf
ir
stt
ime”
“
Thanky
ougogo”y
ouseewhatImean
wi
tht
hiswomanmx
m she’
smaki
ngi
t
har
dformet
onotl
oveher
.WhenIf
ini
sh
bat
hingmydaught
erIdr
yherwi
tha
t
owel
thenl
oti
onherbodybef
ore
dr
essi
ngherupi
nat
ull
epi
nkdr
essand
sandal
s.Icombherhai
rbutshekeeps
f
li
nchi
ng
“
Kubuhl
unguMuuj
i
za”
“
I’
m sor
rybabyIwi
l
lfi
nishr
ightnow”I
t
ieherhai
rint
obun
“
Youar
esobeaut
if
ulmypumpki
n”
“
Thanky
ouMommy
”Icanhearasmi
l
e
i
nherv
oiceandmyhear
tmel
ts.My
daught
eri
sthemostbeaut
if
ulgi
rli
nthe
whol
ewor
ldIdon’
tneedasi
ghtt
osee
t
hatbecauseIcanseet
hatwi
thmy
hear
t.
“
Youar
eal
sobeaut
if
ulmommy
“
Oht
hanky
out
hanky
oumypumpki
n”I
t
ickl
ehercausi
nghert
ogi
ggl
e.Iswear
hergi
ggl
esar
emyabeaut
if
ulmel
odyi
n
myear
s.I
’
m donewi
thev
ery
thi
ngsowe
ar
ewai
ti
ngf
orMpendul
onow.Justt
hen
t
her
e’sabuz
zer
“
Iwi
l
lgogeti
t”Gogosay
sandget
supi
n
secondst
heymaket
hei
rwayi
n
“
Daddy
!”Shewr
iggl
esher
sel
finmy
ar
msandr
unst
oherdaddy
“
Pri
ncess!
”
“
Youar
elat
e”
“
I’
m sor
ryIwashel
dupdoy
ouf
orgi
ve
daddy
?”
“
Yeswher
e’sy
ourwi
fe”
“
She’
sathome.
”
“
Sowhydon’
twegowi
thmommyt
othe
Zoo”
“
Mom i
sbusysweet
hear
t”Isay
“
Okay
”
“
Hel
l
omt
wana”
“
HiMpendul
o”
“
Thanky
ouf
orl
ett
ingmehav
eher
t
oday
”
“
She’
syourdaught
ert
ooy
oudon’
thav
e
t
othankme”
“
Daddy
,Mommybat
hedme!
”Ican’
t
mi
sst
heex
cit
ementi
nherv
oice.Iwas
r
eal
l
ymi
ssi
ngouty
azbuti
t’
snott
oo
l
ate.
“
Real
l
y?”
“
YesandIl
ookbeaut
if
uly
ousee”
“
Yesy
ouar
ebeaut
if
ulmypr
incessdi
d
y
out
hankmommyf
orbat
hingy
ou”
“
Thanky
oumommyf
orbat
hingme.You
ar
ethebestmom i
nthewhol
ewor
ld”I
can’
thel
pagr
int
hatbr
eaksacr
ossmy
l
i
ps.
“
Thanky
oubaby
!”Theysayt
hei
r
goodby
esandl
eav
e
“
He’
sagoodboy
”
“
Yeshei
sespeci
all
ywheni
t’
scomet
o
ki
ds”
GogoandIar
ejustchat
ti
ngwhenshe
r
ecei
vesacal
lfr
om mom say
ingshe’
s
notcomi
ngbackhomet
oday
.Weheara
buz
zerI
t’
sUncl
eK,
heasksmet
otakea
dr
ivewi
thhi
m.Thedr
ivei
sawkwar
dhe
buy
sicecr
eam t
henwechi
l
lbyatt
he
par
k.
“
Howi
syouri
cecr
eam”
“
It
’sni
cebutIl
ovecar
amel
dipi
nst
ead
ofchocol
ate”
“
OhI
’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
tknow”
“
It
’sf
ine”
“
LookI
’
m sor
ryf
ort
hepai
nIputy
ou
t
hroughandt
her
e’snodaypassest
hat
don’
tbearmy
sel
fupaboutwhatIdi
d.I
wantt
oapol
ogi
zef
rom t
hedeepestof
myhear
tMi
ra.Iwaswr
ongandsel
fi
shI
hopey
ouf
indi
tiny
ourhear
ttof
orgi
ve
me”
“
Mom puty
ouupt
othi
s?”
“
Noofcour
senotshedoesn’
tknowI
’
m
her
ewi
thy
ou”
“
Ithoughtshe’
swi
thy
ouhenceshe’
s
notcomi
ngbackhomet
oday
”
“
Shesai
dthat
?Shecamet
omebutshe
l
eft
”
“
Yeahshecal
l
edgogoandt
oldhershe’
s
notcomi
ngbackhomeIt
houghtshe’
s
spendi
ngt
heni
ghtwi
thy
ou”
“
Dammi
t!
”
“
Whati
sit
?”
“
Not
hing…”
“
Uncl
eK.
”
“
Let
’sj
usthopeshe’
snotdr
inki
ng
al
cohol
wher
evershei
s”
“
Ohl
et’
shope….
Ihear
dwhaty
ousayy
ou
r
eal
l
yhur
tmeuncl
eK.It
rust
edy
oubut
y
oupl
ayedwi
thmewi
thy
ournephew.
Ont
opoft
hatIhadt
ospend4y
ear
s
t
hinki
ngmymom i
sdeadbecauseoft
he
r
evengey
ousetagai
nstKhumal
obuti
t
spi
ral
edoutofcont
rol
andIt
urnoutt
o
bet
heonewhosuf
fer
edt
hemost
.”
“
Ngi
yax
oli
sababygi
rlI
’
mreal
l
ysor
ryI
hat
emy
sel
ffort
hepai
nyouandmom
wentt
hrough.Iwant
edt
opr
otecty
ou
t
wobutev
ery
thi
ngspi
ral
edoutof
cont
rol
.Iwi
shy
oucangi
vemeachance
t
oshowmehowsor
ryIam.HowIr
egr
et
ev
ery
thi
ngIdi
d”Hesoundssi
ncer
eso
l
et’
sseehowi
tgoes
“
Itwi
l
ltakemet
imet
ofor
getbutIi
t’
s
f
ineIwi
l
lgi
vey
ouachancet
oshowme
howsor
ryy
ouar
e”
“
Thanky
ousomuch”Hesqueez
esme
“
Ican’
tbr
eat
he”Hel
aughs
“
I’
m sor
ryi
mjustsoex
cit
ed,
Ican’
twai
t
t
ohav
efat
heranddaught
erbondand
dr
ivey
ourmom cr
azy
”Wegi
ggl
e
“
Ihear
dyouhav
eadaught
er”
“
Yesshe’
stur
ning11t
hisy
ear
”
“
NcoooI
t’
sapi
tyIwon’
tmeetherbutI
hopewhenIcomet
ovi
sitIwi
l
lmeet
her
”Heheav
esasi
gh
“
Shet
oldmey
ouar
eleav
ingpl
easer
e-
consi
dery
ourmom l
ovesy
ouMi
ra”
“
Lov
eisnotenoughuncl
eKmom i
s
al
way
sinsul
ti
ngmei
t’
shur
tsy
ouknow
becauseIex
pecthert
obeonmysi
de.
I
’
m notsay
ingsheshoul
dn’
trepr
imand
mebutherwor
dscutdeept
henakni
fe.
I
t’
sli
keshenev
ert
hinksbef
oreshe
t
alks.
”
“
She’
shumanMi
rashewi
l
lmake
mi
stakes”Il
augh
“
Butsheex
pectmet
obeper
fectal
lthe
t
ime”
“
Looky
ourmom hasbeent
hroughal
ot
andshe’
str
yingt
odeal
wit
hheranger
i
ssuest
oget
herwi
thheral
cohol
pr
obl
em.Shegott
oomuchangerduet
o
t
hingst
hathappenedi
nherpast
.Don’
t
f
orgett
hatshehadt
ofi
gur
eli
feonher
ownwi
thnoonet
ogui
deherbyher
sel
f.
Andwhenshet
houghtev
ery
thi
ngi
s
goi
ngwel
lKhumal
ost
art
edabusi
ngher
t
hensheki
l
ledKhumal
oandy
ou
di
sappear
ed.I
t’
stoomuchf
orone
per
son.Taki
ngsomeone’
sli
fet
hatal
one
damageone’
ssoul
immensel
ypl
ease
don’
ttur
nbackonhersheneedsy
ou.
Youar
ether
easonwhyshest
op
dr
inki
ngandst
art
edAAmeet
ingspl
ease
babygi
rli
fyougoshewi
l
lgi
veuponher
l
i
fepl
easedon’
tgopl
ease”
-

“
Cut
!”Il
ookather
,she’
sangr
yasf
uck
“
MrNkosi
wher
e’sy
ourmi
ndt
oday
!”
“
It
’sher
e”
“
Noi
t’
snot
,wehav
ebeendoi
ngt
he
samet
hingf
orhour
sbuty
oukeep
mi
ssi
ngy
ourl
i
nes!
!”
“
I’
mreal
l
ysor
ry,
let
’sdoi
tagai
n”
“
Argmaanl
etscal
li
taday
.MrNkosi
bet
tersor
tyour
sel
fout
!”Sheshakesher
f
latassout
.Isi
ghandr
ubmyf
acei
n
f
rust
rat
ion
“
Let
sgogr
absomedr
inks,
Iseey
ouar
e
noty
our
sel
ftoday
”say
sNosmangal
i
so,
she’
spl
aysasmygi
rl
fr
iendi
nisi
fungo.
Wewer
edoi
ngshootbutmymi
ndi
s
def
ini
tel
ynother
ebutwi
thDol
l
face.
“
I’
m noti
nthemood”
“
Comeonl
overboy
..
.come”Igr
abmy
t
hingsandf
oll
owher
.Wear
eatsome
pubandgr
il
l,
I’
m hav
ingaf
lyi
ngf
ishand
she’
shav
ingheneki
eny
epNosi
sghet
to
l
i
ket
hat
.
“
Sot
ell
mewhatupl
overboy
?”
“
Ial
mostr
elapsedy
est
erday
”sheknows
wehav
ebecomesocl
ose.
“
AhmanI
’
m sor
rybutwhyy
ouf
ought
har
dLwandl
etogobackt
hrought
hat
dar
khol
eagai
n”Iex
plai
ntoherwhat
happened
“
Ahnaweuy
isnay
ilov
erboy
”shesi
pson
herbeer
“
Real
l
yNosmangal
i
so”
“
Yesr
eal
l
ywhydi
dyoubr
eakupwi
tht
he
gi
rli
nst
eadofpr
ovi
ngy
ouruncl
ethat
y
oul
oveher
.Youdi
dex
act
lywhathe
sai
dyouwoul
d”
“
Idi
dar
ightat
hingnj
e”
“
Nol
overboyy
ouf
uckedt
hegi
rland
askf
orherhandi
nmar
ri
aget
hen
dumpedherhowi
sthatar
ightt
hingt
o?
Don’
tyoul
oveher
?”
“
Wit
hev
eryf
iberofmybody
”
“
Thendon’
tpr
ovey
ouruncl
eri
ghtf
ight
f
ory
ourl
ove.Fi
ghtf
ory
ourgi
rl,
you
spent4y
ear
smi
ser
abl
ethaty
our
esor
t
t
odr
ugsandal
mostl
osty
ourl
i
fenow
she’
sbacky
ouj
ustgoi
ngt
ogi
veupj
ust
l
i
ket
hat
”
“
Youar
eri
ghtbutIdon’
tthi
nkshewi
l
l
f
orgi
veme”
“
Iwoul
dn’
tfor
giv
eyout
ooI
fIwer
eher
”
“
Ouch”
“
It
’st
het
rut
hthoughuy
izwi
sil
e
ubuhl
ungui
nganey
abant
uLwandl
e”
(
youbr
oket
hepoorgi
rlLwandl
e)Igr
oan
i
nfr
ust
rat
ion
“
Stopgr
oani
ngandgogety
ourgi
rl
back”
“
Thanky
ouf
ort
headv
ice”
“
Whatwoul
dyoubewi
thoutwi
fey
dear
estnay
euMi
ramel
eaz
iukut
hiy
imi
undl
unkul
u”
“
Ofcour
sewi
feydear
est
”Igul
pdown
mybeerandki
sshercheek
“
Howwi
l
lyougett
oyourpl
ace?
”
“
Don’
twor
ryaboutmegoget
umnakwet
hu”
“
Thanky
ou”Iski
poutandj
umpt
omy
car
.Ist
artatt
hemal
ltogetherf
lower
s,
f
ragr
anceandchocol
ate.It
akeahuge
br
eat
handr
ingt
hebel
l
.Myhear
tski
psa
bi
twhensheappear
slooki
ngbeaut
if
ul
asal
way
s.
“
Funani
la”(
whatdoy
ouwant
)
“
Hel
l
omyDol
l
face”
“
Dol
l
faceukunukaj
ustgo
Lwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Iwantt
oapol
ogi
zest
handwasami
,I
wanty
ouback…”Shebur
sti
ntol
aught
er
unt
ilt
ear
srol
ldownherbeaut
if
ulf
ace
“
Mthet
howakhonawhatdoy
out
hinkI
am heeey
ourt
hingt
opl
aywi
th?
Uy
angi
thanda,
uyangi
bhebha,
ucel
a
ngi
kushade,
uyangal
a,uy
axol
i
sa,
uy
angehl
i
sauy
angeny
usaungi
sal
enal
e
am Iy
ourdol
ltopl
aywi
thhuh?
”(You
l
oveme,
youf
uckme,
youaskmet
o
mar
ryy
ou,
youar
esendi
ngmeupand
downam Iy
ourdol
ltopl
aywi
thhuh)
“
NobabyIunder
stand….
”
“
Noy
ouunder
standnot
hingLwenkosi
I
’
mti
redofy
ouokayj
ustl
eav
eme
al
one!
”
“
Cany
oupl
easej
ustl
i
stent
omet
henI
wi
l
lgo”shef
oldsherar
ms
“Thet
hingsuncl
esai
dmademer
eal
i
ze
howsel
fi
shandcr
uel
Ihav
ebeenhence
Ibr
okeupwi
thy
oubecausey
oudeser
ve
bet
ter
.I’
m nother
ebecauseIdon’
tthi
nk
y
oudon’
tdeser
vebet
terany
mor
ebutI
wantt
obeabet
terper
sonf
ory
oubaby
,
Iwantt
obet
hebestv
ersi
onofmy
sel
f
f
ory
oupl
easegi
vemeachancet
o
makey
ouseewhatImeanwhenIsayI
l
ovey
ou.Iknowi
twi
l
lbehar
dfory
out
o
t
rustmebutIwi
l
ldowhat
everi
t’
stakes
t
owi
nyouback.Il
ovey
ouMi
ra
Mt
himkhul
umor
ethanany
thi
ngIhav
e
ev
erl
ovedi
nthi
sent
ir
ewor
ld.I
’
m
not
hingwi
thouty
oubabyIcan’
twal
k
t
hisear
thwi
thouty
oubymysi
de.You
ar
ethebestpar
tofmyl
i
fe,
Iwantt
o
gr
owol
dwi
thy
ouMashwabada.Youf
il
l
ev
eryv
oidi
nmyhear
tandsoul
wit
hyour
pr
esence.Yout
ouchev
erychor
dofmy
bei
ngwi
tht
hedi
vi
nit
yofy
ourl
ove.I
wontbeabl
etol
i
veasi
ngl
edaywi
thout
y
ou,
the4y
ear
swast
ort
urebabyandI
hadnocont
rol
oft
hesi
tuat
ionbutnow
y
ouar
eback.Iwantt
ospendt
her
estof
myl
i
fewi
thy
ou.Mywor
ldi
siny
our
ar
ms,
eyes,
hear
tandsoul
.Pl
easef
indi
t
i
nyourhear
ttof
orgi
veme
Mashwabada”Ibl
i
nkmyt
ear
sbackas
her
sfal
ldown
“
Lwenkosi
udl
alangot
handol
wami
”
“
Ngi
yaz
ist
handwasami
ngi
yaz
ijustgi
ve
met
hisonechanceIpr
omi
sey
ouwon’
t
r
egr
eti
t.
..
let
’sst
artov
erbabyIpr
omi
se
y
out
hatt
hist
imet
ear
sthatwi
l
lfal
lon
y
ourbeaut
if
ulf
aceofy
our
swi
l
lbeof
j
oy.
”Shei
sacr
yingmess,
Ipul
lhert
o
myar
m andcomf
orther
“
Youkeeppl
ayi
ngwi
thmyhear
thow
canIt
rusty
out
haty
ouwi
l
lnev
erhur
t
meagai
n?”
“
It
’shar
dbutl
etmepr
ovei
ttoy
ou
pl
ease”
“
What
’st
hatsmel
l
”
“
It
’sf
lower
s,Ibr
oughty
ouf
lower
s,
chocol
atesandf
ragr
ance”Shepul
l
s
backandwi
peshert
ear
s
“
Ifor
giv
eyoubutIcan’
ttakey
ouback”
“
Mir
apl
easet
ell
mewhatIshoul
ddo”
“
Not
hingact
ual
l
y”
“
Babypl
ease”
“
NoLwenkosi
udl
alangami
ngobawaz
i
ukut
hingi
yakut
handa”j
ustt
oheart
hose
wor
dsIsmi
l
eIt
houghtshehat
esme
“
I’
m goi
ngt
okneel
bef
orey
ouandbeg
y
oubaby
”Ikneel
downandhol
dher
handpl
ant
ingki
ssesoni
t
“
Lwenkosi
”Shewhi
sper
stear
sdr
oppi
ng
downherf
ace
“
Ngi
yakuncengaj
ustt
hisonechance”
“
Getupandgi
vememyt
hings”Igetup
andgi
vehert
hef
lower
sandt
hegi
ftbag.
“
Thanky
ousomuch”Shesay
sasshe
smel
l
sthef
lower
s
“
Theysmel
lsol
ovel
y.Letmegoi
ndul
ge
onmychocol
atecl
oset
hedoorony
our
wayout
”
Shet
urnst
owal
kaway
“
Mir
awami
”
“
Shel
aLwenkosi
,ngi
funaungi
shel
e
may
beaf
ter3y
ear
sifngi
chaz
eka
ngi
zokuqoma.Si
j
olef
oranot
her3y
ear
ngaphandl
ekokwenz
aucansi
”(cour
t
Lwenkosi
,Iwanty
out
ocour
tme
may
beaf
ter3y
ear
sifI
’
mint
erest
edI
wi
l
lgi
vey
ouachance,
wewi
l
ldat
efor3
y
ear
swi
thouthav
ingsex)
Wi
tht
hatsai
dshewal
ksawayl
eav
ing
megapi
ngmymout
h
CHAPTER52

Icheckedi
fI’
m notl
eav
ingany
thi
ng
behi
ndt
henI
’
mreadyt
ogo.Homewas
ar
eal
l
ygoodescapef
rom t
hewor
ldbut
Ican’
thi
def
orev
er.Ihav
etogobackt
o
Dur
banandf
aceev
ery
thi
ng.Imi
ssmy
man,
Ican’
tspendmor
edaywi
thouthi
m.
“
Mom”Shedoesn’
tlookatmenor
acknowl
edget
hatI
’
m cal
l
ingherbut
cont
inueswi
thherchoppi
ngwhi
l
e
t
alki
ngt
omyaunt
.
“
Mama”Isi
ght
het
ensi
oni
nthi
shouse
i
stoomuch,
Ican’
tst
andi
twhenmy
par
ent
sar
emadatmeanddadi
snot
ev
ent
alki
ngt
ome.
“
Thanky
ouf
ort
alki
ngt
odad”Dadwas
v
eryangr
yact
ual
l
yhest
il
li
sandhe
want
edt
odr
ivet
oDur
banandbeatt
he
shi
toutofLwandl
efor“
ent
eri
nghi
s
kr
aal
”wi
thouthi
sconsentbutmom
cal
medhi
m down.Ir
eal
l
yappr
eci
ate
whatshedi
dbesi
det
hedr
amat
hat
woul
dhav
ehappenedIwoul
dhav
ehad
t
otel
lthem t
hatLwandl
eisnotmyv
irgi
n
br
eakert
hatwoul
dhav
ebeen
embar
rassi
ngt
hatIal
readysl
eptwi
th
t
woguy
s.I
t’
sbet
tert
heyt
hinkLwandl
e
i
smyf
ir
stt
hroughev
ery
thi
ng.
“
Idi
dn’
tdot
hatf
ory
ou,
Icoul
dn’
tlet
y
ourf
atherembar
rassus”ouch
“
MamaIknowy
ouar
emadat
…”
“
I’
m notmadAy
andai
m di
sappoi
ntedi
n
y
ou!Youpr
omi
sedmet
haty
ougoi
ngt
o
st
aypur
eunt
ily
ougetmar
ri
ed!What
happenedt
oyourpr
omi
sehuh?
”
“
Ngi
l
ingeki
l
emamangi
yax
oli
sa”(Iwas
t
empt
edmom I
’
m sor
ry)
“
Tempt
edmyf
oot
!Youshoul
d’v
est
ayed
awayf
rom boy
sify
oucoul
dn'
tcont
rol
y
our
sel
f!Wehadanagr
eementt
haty
ou
candat
ebuty
ouwi
l
lst
aypur
eunt
il
mar
ri
age!
”
“
I’
m sor
ry”If
eel
war
mli
qui
drunni
ng
downmyf
ace.
“
Washeput
ti
ngy
ouunderpr
essur
e?”
“
Nomom”
“
Thenwhycoul
dn’
thewai
tfory
ou”
“
Mommyhewasn’
tput
ti
nganypr
essur
e
onme.Icoul
dn’
tcont
rol
mysel
f.I
’
m so
sor
ryf
ordi
sappoi
nti
ngy
oui
fIcoul
dI’
d
changeev
ery
thi
ng.I
’
mreal
l
ysor
ryf
rom
t
hedeepestofmyhear
t”shedoesn’
tsay
any
thi
ng.Iwi
pemyt
ear
s
“
Ilov
eyoumamausal
ekahl
e”(
goodby
e)
Iwal
koutandheadt
odadwher
ehe’
s
f
eedi
nghi
schi
ckens.Hel
oveshi
sst
ock
andhei
staki
ngv
erygoodofcar
eofi
t.
“
Babasengy
ahambausal
ekahl
e”(
Dad
I
’
mleav
inggoodby
e)Hedoesn’
tsay
any
thi
ng,
Iwal
kawaywi
thaheav
yhear
t.
Iki
ssmyl
i
ttl
ebr
other
swhoar
epl
ayi
ng
andgot
omyaunt
’scar
.If
indher
al
readywai
ti
ngf
orme.She’
sgoi
ngt
o
dr
ivemet
otownwher
eIwi
l
ltakeat
axi
t
oDur
ban.
“
Yout
ookev
ery
thi
ng”
“
Ehaunt
y”
“
Buckl
eup”Ist
rapi
nasshest
art
sthe
car
.Ican’
tst
opmyt
ear
saswedr
ive
away
.Ihat
eleav
ingt
hesi
tuat
ionl
i
ke
t
his.
“
Aya”
“
Aunt
y”Isayi
naudi
blyso
“
Lookatme”Iwi
pemyt
ear
sandl
ookat
her
“
Don’
tcr
yit
’sgoi
ngt
obeokay
”
“
Itwon’
tAunt
ytheyhat
eme”
“
Theydon’
that
eyou,
theyar
ejust
di
sappoi
ntedi
nyou”Iwi
pemyt
ear
s
“
Ain’
tyoudi
sappoi
ntedi
nme?
”Aunt
y
Por
ti
aismydad’
sli
tt
lesi
ster
.She’
sthe
cool
estaunt
yev
er.She’
sinherl
ate20’
s
andbeaut
if
ulasev
er.
“
NoI
’
m notbaby
,Iunder
standy
ouar
e
20y
ear
sol
dyazsomegi
rl
soutt
her
e
l
oset
hei
rvi
rgi
nit
yasear
lyast
heyt
urn
15.Mi
naI
’
m sopr
oudofy
ouact
ual
l
yas
l
ongasy
ouar
epl
ayi
ngi
tsaf
epl
ease
don’
tfal
lpr
egnantAy
anda.Youst
il
lgot
abr
ightf
utur
eaheadofy
ou.Iwantt
o
seey
ougr
aduat
ingandbet
hebest
l
awy
eri
nthewhol
ewor
ld.Ushoabo
y
ourwor
shi
p,i
fit
spl
easet
hecour
tmy
l
ord,
Iwi
l
lli
ket
ont
onnt
onaccor
ding
sect
ionbani
bani
all
thosebi
gwor
ds
l
awy
erssaywhent
heyl
i
etopr
otect
t
hei
rcr
imi
nal
cli
ent
s”Il
augh
“
AwAunt
y,y
oumakei
tlookl
i
kel
awy
ers
ar
ecr
ooks”
“
Vel
elawy
ersar
ebl
oodycr
ooks.Howt
o
getawaywi
thmur
dergi
vesust
heex
act
pi
ctur
eoft
hel
i
es,
decei
tand
mani
pul
ati
onl
awy
ersdoj
ustt
owi
nthe
case”
“
ComeonAunt
y,I
t’
saser
iesnot
ev
ery
thi
ngi
sreal
”
“
Butst
il
lAy
a..
.sol
et’
stal
kabouty
our
r
elat
ionshi
pwi
thy
ourboy
fri
end.Ar
ethe
r
umor
str
uet
hathehasachi
l
dwi
thhi
s
ex
”
“
Idon’
tknowr
eal
l
y,Ihav
en’
ttal
kedt
o
hi
m.I
’
m scar
edaunt
ywhati
fhedoesn’
t
wantmenomor
e”
“
Yourmom sai
dhecameher
eandy
ou
di
dn’
tcomeout
.Idon’
tthi
nkhe
woul
d’v
ecomeal
lthewayf
rom Dur
ban
i
fhedoesn’
t”
“
Butst
il
lAunt
ytheyshar
esomuchwi
th
t
hisgi
rl
.Hedeepl
ylov
esherandi
fthe
l
i
ttl
egi
rli
sindeedt
hei
rdaught
eroh
God…”
“
Heyheyst
opst
ressi
ng,
theguyhasn’
t
t
oldy
out
hathedoesn’
tlov
eyou.I
t’
s
under
standabl
ethathemayst
il
lhav
e
f
eel
i
ngsf
ort
hegi
rlbecauseshewent
mi
ssi
ngsot
echni
cal
l
ytheydi
dn’
tbr
eak
upsoonhewi
l
lreal
i
zet
hathe’
sov
erher
andf
ocusony
ou”
“
SowhatdoIdoi
nthemeant
ime,
wat
ch
hi
m spendt
imewi
thherwhi
l
eIknow
deepdownI
’
m hur
ti
ng”
“
Nosi
l
lywenay
ouhav
etomakehi
m
r
emembert
her
easonhemov
edonand
whyhei
swi
thy
ou.
”
“
How?
”shewi
nksandsmi
l
es
“
Justgoandt
alkt
ohi
mthenwewi
l
ltal
k
af
tert
hat
.Igoty
ouokay
,theboyi
s
y
our
s”
-

Wowt
otel
lyouI
’
m st
unnedwoul
dbean
under
stat
ementsoIhav
etocour
ther
f
or3y
ear
sandwhatar
ethepossi
bil
i
ties
t
hatshewi
l
lgi
vemeachanceaf
tert
hat
3y
ear
s.Idon’
tev
enwantt
oment
ion3
y
ear
swi
thoutsexbutatl
eastshe’
s
gi
vi
ngmeachancet
opr
ovemy
sel
fto
her
.Idon’
tthi
nkIwoul
d’v
esur
viv
edi
f
shet
oldmet
hatshedoesn’
twantt
osee
menomor
eandIshoul
dst
ayaway
f
rom her
.Thi
sisact
ual
l
ythebestnews
andI
’
m goi
ngt
odowhat
everi
ttakest
o
pr
ovet
oherhowmuchshemeanst
o
me.She’
sdef
ini
tel
ytheonef
orme.

I
t’
sfunnyInev
erbel
i
evedi
nsoul
mat
es
andt
ruel
ovebecauseoft
het
hingst
hat
happenedar
oundmeespeci
all
yinmy
par
ent
smar
ri
age.Theendl
esspr
ayer
s
andcr
iesIuset
ohearcomi
ngf
rom my
mom’
sbedr
oom whenev
erdadi
sout
t
her
ewi
thhi
shoesandt
her
apet
hat
t
ookpl
acer
ighti
nfr
ontofmyey
esl
eft
mewi
thsomuchconf
usi
onandpai
n.I
coul
dn’
tunder
standwhydadwas
t
reat
ingmom l
i
ket
hatandIwon’
tli
eI
hat
edhi
mforwhathedi
dtomom.
Theangerandhat
redIhadt
owar
dshi
m
wasbey
ondmeasur
abl
esol
ooki
ngat
t
hepai
nIhav
eputt
hegi
rl
sinmyl
i
fe
t
hroughj
ustr
emi
ndedmeofhowmy
daduset
otr
eatmymom andIf
elt
angerandr
emor
seengul
fi
ngme.I
cr
uci
fi
edmy
sel
fformybr
utal
act
ions
andIcamet
oar
eal
i
zat
iont
hatuncl
eis
r
ightIdon’
tdeser
veYay
anordol
l
face.
Ther
e’snot
hingashar
dascomi
ngt
oa
r
eal
i
zat
iont
haty
ouar
ewhaty
ou
despi
set
hemostorbecomi
ngt
he
per
sont
haty
ouhat
ethemost
.Real
i
zing
t
hatI
’
m ex
act
lywhatIdespi
set
hemost
whi
chi
sinf
li
cti
ngpai
ntoot
herpeopl
e
especi
all
ytheonesIcl
aimt
olov
etor
e
meapar
t.

Icoul
dn’
thandl
emyemot
ions,
they
wer
eal
lov
ert
hepl
ace,
theonl
ythi
ngI
t
houghtwast
her
ightt
hingt
odowast
o
l
etdol
l
facego.Iwant
edt
opr
otecther
f
rom myt
oxi
csel
fbutNosgav
emea
mot
ivat
iont
ori
ghtmywr
ongsandbe
t
hebet
terper
sont
hatIwoul
dbepr
oud
ofonedayj
ustl
i
kedad.Wemani
fest
pai
ndi
ff
erent
lyandwedeal
wit
hit
di
ff
erent
ly.Dadcoul
dn’
thandl
e
mkhul
u’
sdeat
hthathel
osthi
msel
fand
di
dthi
ngshei
sn’
tpr
oudofbuthel
ear
nt
al
essonl
i
fewast
ryi
ngt
oteachhi
m.
Li
fehasnomanual
andi
t’
snota
st
rai
ghtj
our
ney
.Thear
eobst
acl
es
al
ongt
hewayt
hatweshoul
dencount
er
t
oshapeusandmol
dust
obet
he
st
rongandbestv
ersi
onsofour
sel
ves.
Letmesaywi
thpr
idet
hatI
’
m pr
oudof
t
hemanmyf
atheri
s.

Ij
umpoutofmycarandmakemyway
t
othehousewhi
l
ewhi
stl
i
ngasongIf
eel
waybet
tert
hanIwasf
eel
i
nghal
fan
hourago.If
indmypar
ent
stouchy
-feel
y
i
ntheki
tchenandmom i
sgi
ggl
i
ngl
i
kea
t
eenager
.
“
Woahwoahf
olkst
hisi
saki
tchennot
y
ourbedr
oom”
“
Heyi
t’
sourhouse,
buyy
our
sify
ou
hav
eapr
obl
em boy
”dadsay
sandmom
l
aughs
“
Siy
anci
ki
sel
wa,
it’
sokay”Theybot
h
chor
tl
e
“
Howar
eyoumyboy
”
“
I’
m awesomeandy
oumommy
dear
est
!”Theybot
hlookatmeasi
fthey
sear
chi
ngsomet
hing
“
I’
m nothi
ghguy
srel
ax”
“
Buty
ouar
einagoodmood”
“
Mom r
eal
l
y”
“
I’
m sor
rymyboyi
t’
sjustt
hat
..
”she
si
ghs
“
Wel
ltel
luswhatmadey
ousohappy
”
“
Ngi
mit
hisi
l
e”(
Imadesomeone
pr
egnant
)
“
Whaaaaaat
!”Theybot
hscr
eam
poppi
ngt
hei
rey
esout
,Ican’
thel
pbut
chor
tl
e
“
Eywenawear
enoty
ourgr
andpar
ent
s”
mom say
sasshesl
apst
hebackofmy
head
“
Ouchchi
l
dabuse!
”
“
Tal
k”dadsay
s
“
Iwentt
oaskdol
l
face'
sfor
giv
eness,
wel
lshedi
dn’
treal
l
yfor
giv
emebutgav
e
meachancet
opr
ovemy
sel
f,pr
ovet
o
herhowmuchI
'
m ser
iousabouther
”
“
Ithoughty
ousai
dyouar
esur
eabout
l
ett
inghergoLwandl
e”mom say
s
“
Iwassur
emamabutwhycan’
tIbea
bet
terper
sont
hatshedeser
vesi
nst
ead
ofl
ett
inghergo”
“
Ili
kehowy
out
hinkboy
”dadsay
sbut
mom doesn’
tlookhappyatal
l
“
Mom y
oudon’
tlookhappy
”
“
I’
m happyf
ory
ouboy
”shef
akesa
smi
l
e
“
Tal
ktomemunt
unz
akababa”she
bl
ushesohIknowIhi
tther
ightspot
“
Thet
hingi
sbaby
,Idon’
twanty
out
o
gethur
tany
mor
e.Ihav
ereal
i
zedev
er
si
ncey
oumetMi
ray
ouhav
ebeen
t
hroughal
ot.Yourl
ovei
ssobeaut
if
ul
butt
her
e’st
oomuchhear
tbr
eaknj
e.I
want
edy
out
ost
artaf
reshy
ouknow
awayf
rom ev
ery
thi
ngt
hatwi
l
lremi
nd
y
ouofMi
ra”
“
Rel
ati
onshi
phav
eupsanddownsmom
t
hat
’snor
mal
andwehav
en’
thada
chancet
oex
plor
eourl
ovewi
thoutany
agendaorany
one’
sint
erf
erence.Il
ove
Mi
ramamaandIwi
l
lnev
erf
orgether
ev
eni
fIcanbet
housandmi
l
esaway
f
rom her
.Thatgi
rlhol
dst
hekeyt
omy
hear
t”
“
Iheary
oubaby
,al
lIwanti
sfory
out
o
behappyt
hat
'sal
l
”
“
Yesboyy
ourmom i
sri
ghtwej
ustwant
y
out
obehappyandknowt
hatwear
e
her
efory
ouany
timey
ouneedus.
Kuz
omel
euqi
neubeuy
indoda
Lwandl
elwenkosi
andst
opbei
ngacr
y
baby
.Mi
rai
ssof
tandbr
oken,
sheneeds
ast
rongmanbyhersi
dewhowi
l
lbe
t
her
eforheremot
ional
l
y,spi
ri
tual
l
yand
phy
sical
l
ysi
yez
wana”
“
Yebobabangi
yakuz
wa”(
yesdadIhear
y
ou)
“
Wel
ovey
ouboy
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oof
olks”
“
Soshe’
sgi
vi
ngy
ouachancet
opr
ove
y
our
sel
fandhowex
act
lyar
eyougoi
ng
t
odot
hat
”dadasks
“
Heebaba,
youwon’
tbel
i
evewhatshe
sai
d.Ut
hishewant
smet
ocour
ther
,
may
beaf
ter3y
ear
sifshe’
sint
erest
ed
wecandat
ewi
thouthav
ingsexf
or3
y
ear
s”Dadbur
sti
ntol
aught
erwhi
l
e
mom hasasmi
l
eofappr
oval
“
That
’smygi
rl
!”say
smom
“
Yhookuni
zi
mamos,
doknowhowt
o
cour
t”
“
Ofcour
se”Theybot
hlookatmeand
l
augh.Theydon’
tbel
i
eveme
“
Youdon’
tbel
i
eveme”
“
Shel
angi
bo”dadsay
s
“
Dudl
unt
ombi
madol
okany
oko”
“
Andt
hen”
“
Hayphel
angi
saz
ocabangaokuny
e”
Theybur
sti
ntol
aught
er,
I’
m gl
adt
hey
ar
efi
ndi
ngt
hisf
unny
.Ther
e’ssomeone
ont
hegat
e.
“
Iwi
l
lgeti
t”Isayandgot
oat
tend
whoev
eri
svi
sit
ing.If
reez
ewhenIsee
Yay
a.
“
Hel
l
o”
“
HiYay
a”Ther
e’ssi
l
ence
“
Canwet
alk”
“
Yeahsur
e,l
et’
sgot
othegar
den”we
makeourwayt
othegar
denandsi
tby
t
hebencht
her
e.
“
Howhav
eyoubeen?
”Iask
“
Fineandy
ou”
“
Met
oo”
“
I’
m sor
ryt
hatIdi
dn’
tcomeoutt
hatday
,
Iwasangr
y”
“
Howcany
oubeangr
ywi
thoutgi
vi
ng
meachancet
oex
plai
n?”
“
I’
m sor
ryokaywhenIsawy
oual
l
t
oget
her
,myhearbr
oke”
“
Iheary
ou.
..
thel
i
ttl
egi
rli
snotmychi
l
d,
I
’
m sor
ryt
haty
ougott
hewr
ongendof
t
hest
ick”
“
Ohshe’
snoty
our
s?”
“
Yes”
“
Who’
sthef
atherpho?
”
“
Itdoesn’
tconcer
nyouYay
a”
“
Whatwer
eyoudoi
ngwi
thher
”
“
Iwant
edt
ospendt
imewi
thher
,pl
ease
under
standt
hati
t’
sbeeny
ear
slomunt
u
ngi
ngamboni
.Iwant
edcl
osur
e,Idi
dn’
t
meant
ohur
tyou”
“
Iseesodi
dyougetcl
osur
e”
“
Honest
lyIf
oundmor
ethencl
osur
e”I
cl
earmyt
hroatandhol
dherhands
“
Iwanty
ouknowt
haty
ouar
ebeaut
if
ul,
i
ntel
l
igent
,sex
yandamaz
ingwomana
guycoul
dev
eraskf
or.I
’
m sor
ryt
hatI
’
m
nott
hatguyf
ory
ou,
myhear
tbel
ongst
o
someoneel
se.Iknowt
hatIpr
omi
sedt
o
t
akecar
eofy
ourhear
tbuther
eIam
br
eaki
ngi
t.I
’
mver
ysor
ryYay
a,I
twas
nev
ermyi
ntent
ion.Iwi
shy
oucanf
indi
t
i
nyourhear
ttof
orgi
vemeoneday
”
“
NoLwandl
edon’
tdot
hatt
omepl
ease,
y
oupr
omi
sedme!Youpr
omi
sedme!
”
Shesobs
“
Iknow,
IknowandI
’
m sor
ry”
“
Lwandl
esuy
enz
alent
o,Il
ovey
oumi
na
andIdon’
twanty
out
oleav
emepl
ease”
ohl
ordt
hisi
shar
dert
hanIt
hought
“
I’
m sor
ry…”
“
Howcoul
dyoudot
hist
omehuh?You
j
ustgonnadi
tchmewi
thi
nasecondshe
cameback”
“
I’
m sor
ry…”
“
PleaseLwandl
edontsayt
hat
,pl
ease
t
akebackt
hosewor
ds,
I’
m beggi
ngy
ou”
Shehol
dsmet
ight
lyasshecr
ies.Oh
l
ordpl
easef
orgi
veme.

I
’
m chi
l
li
ngal
onewat
chi
ngNet
fl
ixwhi
l
e
st
uff
ingmy
sel
fwi
thmychocol
atest
hat
Lwenkosi
boughtf
ormey
est
erday
.
Gogowentt
oseeuncl
eK’
smom
appar
ent
lyt
heyhav
egr
owncl
ose,
mom
di
dn’
tcomebacky
est
erdayi
ndeed.I
wonderwher
eshei
sifuncl
eKsai
dshe
l
efthi
shouse.Mpendul
odi
dn’
tbr
ing
backmydaught
ery
est
erday
.Hecal
l
ed
mel
astni
ghtt
hathewi
l
lbr
ingherback
t
odayt
heyar
egoi
ngt
othedoct
orf
or
DNAt
est
.I’
m pi
ssedashel
lwhyt
he
suddenchangenowIt
houghthesai
d
he’
ssat
isf
iedandIhat
esudden
changesespeci
all
ywheni
t’
scomest
o
mydaught
er.Whatweagr
eedonwas
hi
mtaki
ngmydaught
ert
othez
oot
hen
br
ingi
ngherback.Idon’
thav
eapr
obl
em
wi
thhi
m spendi
ngt
heni
ghtwi
thhi
s
daught
erhel
ostmanyni
ght
swi
thher
butIdon’
tli
kesuddenchangeoft
hings.
Si
ghmay
beI
’
m ov
err
eact
ingbutIcan’
t
hel
pbutf
eel
thi
sway
.Idr
agmy
sel
fup
whenIhearabuz
zerandgoat
tend
whoev
eri
svi
sit
ing.
“
Mommy
!”
“
Baby
”Ipi
ckherupandpl
antki
ssesal
l
ov
erherf
acecausi
nghert
ogi
ggl
e.I
mi
ssedhersomuch.
“
Hel
l
oMi
ra”myhear
tst
opbeat
ingf
ora
moment
.
“
Gugu”Isay
,Idon’
tknowi
fIshoul
d
j
umpt
oherandhugherr
ightnow
consi
der
ingwhati
shappeni
ng.
“
Soxhadt
otakehi
smamat
othe
hospi
tal
,she’
snotf
eel
i
ngwel
lsoI
br
oughtKamar
ia”
“
Oht
hanky
ou”Ther
e’sawkwar
dsi
l
ence,
wownev
eri
nmywi
l
destdr
eams,
hadI
ev
ert
houghtt
hatt
her
ewoul
dev
eran
awkwar
dsi
l
encebet
weenGuguandI
,
f
rom t
hatmomentIknewt
hatt
hings
bet
weenuswi
l
lnev
erbet
hesame.Iput
pumpki
ndown
“
Doy
ouwantany
thi
ngt
odr
ink”Iask
br
eaki
ngt
heuncomf
ort
abl
esi
l
ence
“
CanIhol
dyou”ohi
t’
sli
key
ouknow
howI
’
m dy
ingt
ohol
dyour
ightnow
“
Doy
ouhav
etoask”Shepul
l
smei
nher
ar
msandwesqueez
eeachot
herf
ort
he
l
ongestt
ime.If
eel
tear
sbur
ningmy
ey
es
“
Imi
ssedy
ousomuch”Isay
“
Imi
ssedy
out
oo”wepul
lback
“
Bit
chy
oust
il
lasbeaut
if
ulasev
er!
”
Okayshe’
sbackonnow
“
Okaysomet
hingsnev
erchange”Isay
”
Youwi
l
lal
way
sbemybi
tch,
youbi
tch!
”
Webur
sti
ntol
aught
er.Ipourherand
Kamar
iaj
uicet
henweheadt
othel
i
ving
r
oom andset
tl
edown.
“
Youhav
eabeaut
if
uldaught
er”
“
Thanky
ouchomz
”
“
Itcameasqui
teashockt
haty
ouand
SoxheeeMi
raubuf
ebe”Ichuckl
e
“
Don’
tjudgepl
ease,
I’
m notpr
oudof
whathappened”
“
I’
m sur
eyouar
enot
”
“
NaweInev
ert
houghty
oubei
n
r
elat
ionshi
pwi
thhi
mletal
onebei
ng
engagedt
ohi
m”
“
Met
ooheybuty
ourdi
sappear
ance
br
oughtuscl
oser
,don’
tgetmewr
ong
buti
twasabl
essi
ngi
ndi
sgui
se.Il
ove
t
hatmanMi
rasomuchandIwoul
ddo
any
thi
ngt
okeephi
m asmi
neal
way
s”I
cl
earmyt
hroat
“
Ofcour
sehei
syour
sGugu,
Idon’
twant
hi
m whathappenedwasami
staket
hat
shoul
dn’
thav
ehappened.Ihav
eno
i
ntent
ionsoft
aki
nghi
m”
“
Iknowy
ouwoul
dn’
tdot
hatt
omeMi
ra,
woul
dyou?
”
“
Real
l
ynow,
youaski
ngmet
hat
?”
“
Sor
ryt
hissi
tuat
ioni
shar
dokay
,Idon’
t
knowhowt
ohandl
ethef
actt
haty
ou
hav
echi
l
dwi
thmyf
iancé.I
t’
sreal
l
ynot
ani
deal
sit
uat
ion”
“
Iunder
standbutIhopei
twon’
taf
fect
ourr
elat
ionshi
p,bot
hofusar
evi
cti
min
t
hissi
tuat
ion,
canwej
ustputi
tbehi
nd
usandmov
eon.Il
ovey
ouGuguandI
don’
twantt
olosey
ou”
“
Ilov
eyout
ooMi
raandIdon’
twantt
o
l
osey
out
oo.Ibetwecant
ryt
oputi
t
behi
ndusandmov
eon”atl
eastwear
e
r
eachi
ngacommongr
ound.
“
IthoughtMpendul
oiscool
wit
h
moonl
i
ght
’spet
erni
ty,
whydoeshewant
DNAt
estnow”Shecl
ear
shert
hroat
“
Hej
ustwant
edt
obesur
e,heonce
r
aisedababyt
hatwasnothi
s”
“
Iunder
standbutIwoul
dn'
thav
esai
d
t
hebabyi
shi
sifshe’
snot
.It
’squi
tean
i
nsul
treal
l
yespeci
all
ywhenheknows
henev
erusedpr
otect
ionbutI
under
stand,
it’
sfi
ne.Ihopehewi
l
lbe
sat
isf
iedwi
tht
her
esul
tsbecauset
he
l
astt
hingIwanti
shi
m al
way
sdoubt
ing
t
hati
fKamar
iai
shi
s”
“
Uhm y
eah”Ther
estoft
hehour
sthat
f
oll
owsaf
tert
hatwecat
chupwhi
l
e
st
uff
ingour
sel
ves.Ir
eal
l
ymi
ssedher
y
azandIhopenot
hingcomesbet
ween
us.Wehav
eagoodt
imet
oget
herl
i
ke
t
heol
dti
mes,
she’
sst
il
lascr
azyasf
uck.
“
Thanky
ousomuchIhadal
ovel
yti
me”
“
Met
oo”wehug
“
Iwi
l
lseey
ouatt
hepar
ty”
shesay
s
“
Whatpar
ty?
”
“
Umm not
hingby
e”
“
Bye”okayt
hatwasawkwar
d.Ispend
t
hedaycuddl
i
ngmybabyandl
i
steni
ng
t
oherbl
abbi
ngunt
ilshedoseof
fto
sl
eep.Imust
’vef
all
asl
eept
oobecause
I
’
m wokenupbymyphone.Ipl
ace
pumpki
nont
hecouchf
ir
standt
akemy
phone
“
Ell
o”
“
Iwokey
ouup”myhear
tski
psabeat
ar
ghIhat
etheef
fecthehasonmebut
I
’
m notgoi
ngt
olethi
minj
ustl
i
ket
hat
.
Lwandl
elwenkosi
thi
nksI
’
m hi
spl
ay
t
hingIsee.
“
Yeah”
“
I’
m sor
ry”
“
It
’sokay
,howcanIhel
pyou”
“
For
giv
emymanner
sIwassupposedt
o
gr
eetf
ir
st.GooddayMi
ssMt
himkhul
u”
“
GooddayMrNkosi
howar
eyou”
“
I’
m wel
landy
ou”
“
I’
m al
sookay
”
“
Iwoul
dli
ket
otakey
ououtf
ordi
nner
t
oni
ghtat7pm,
pleasesayy
es”
“
Ihav
epl
ans”
“
Whatpl
ans?
”
“
Nonet
hatconcer
nsy
ouMr
”
“
Iwon’
tspendt
oomuchofy
ourt
ime,
j
ustanhourpl
easeMashwabada”
“
Okayanhourwi
l
lbef
ine”
“
That
’sal
lIask.Hav
eabeaut
if
ulr
estof
t
heday
”
“
Thanky
ou”Ihangup.I
fitwasot
her
t
imesIwoul
dbehappybutLwenkosi
is
ex
haust
ingr
eal
l
y.Onemi
nut
ehel
oves
met
henex
tit
’sov
er.Ir
eadydon’
ttr
ust
hi
m wi
thmyhear
tany
mor
e.Gogo
ar
ri
ves
“
Nunuz
a”
“
Gri
zagi
rly
ouback”
“
Ngi
zokushay
awena!
”Il
augh
“
Tel
lmeabouty
ourday
”sheset
tl
es
nex
ttomeandshar
esherdaywi
thher
newf
ri
end.Ial
soshar
emi
ne.
“
Don’
tbet
oocomf
ort
abl
enunuz
a
ar
oundt
hatgi
rlany
thi
ngi
spossi
blenow
r
emembery
ougav
eherf
iancéachi
l
d”
“
Wet
alkedgogoandshe’
scool
”
“
Justbecar
eful
okay
”
“
OkayGr
izaGi
rlwami
”shepokesme,
I
gi
ggl
e
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
haty
ouar
eleav
ing
t
omor
row,
Iwi
l
lmi
ssy
ou”
“
Iwi
l
lmi
ssy
out
oogogo.
..
uhm gogo”
“
Yes”
“
I’
mI.
..
afr
iendofmi
newant
stot
akeme
outt
oni
ghti
fit
’sokaywi
thy
ouof
cour
se”
“
Who’
sthatf
ri
end?
”
“
Uhm Gugu”Shel
aughs
“
Youar
ely
ingi
l
omf
anawakaNkosi
”(i
ts
t
hatNkosi
boy
)Inodwi
thmyhead
“
Uyamt
handal
omf
anaheh?
”(Youl
ove
t
hisboyhuh)
“
Yesgogo”
“
Wel
ltheny
oucangobutIwantt
ohav
e
awor
dwi
thhi
m bef
orey
out
wogo”
“
Whaty
ougoi
ngt
osayt
ohi
m?”
“
Akukf
uni
lokhowena”ouch
“
Mom hasn’
tcont
act
edy
out
oday
?”
“
Shedi
d,shesai
dshe’
scomi
nghome
t
odaybutshewi
l
lbev
eryl
ate”
“
Okay
”
GogoandIar
ecooki
ngwhenIr
ecei
vea
del
i
ver
y.
“
Whati
sthat
?”I
t’
sabi
gboxandt
her
e’s
not
ethathasadescr
ipt
ionofwhati
s
i
nsi
dewhi
chi
say
ell
owl
ongdr
ess,
bl
acksandal
sandsl
i
veraccessor
ies.
WowMrNkosi
isr
eal
l
yai
mingt
o
i
mpr
essi
sn’
the
“
Thesear
ebeaut
if
ulnunuz
a,hehas
t
ast
emaan”
“
Yeah”Isayi
nawe.Ti
mef
lyv
eryf
ast
bef
oreIknowi
t,i
t’
sti
mef
ormet
o
pr
epar
emy
sel
f.It
akeal
ongbat
hand
onceI
’
m doneIgetdr
essed.The
per
fumeheboughtf
ormesmel
l
slov
eyI
appl
yitandt
iemyt
wisti
ntoabunt
hen
I
’
mreadyt
ogo.Lwandl
elwenkosi
has
ar
ri
vedandgogoi
stal
ki
ngwi
thhi
m.I
wantt
obepar
toft
heconv
ersat
ionso
badbutgogowon’
tal
l
owmewhent
hey
ar
efi
nisht
heycal
lme.
“
Mommy
,youar
eleav
ingme”
“
Iwi
l
lcomebacksweet
hear
t”
“
Iwantt
ogowi
thy
ou”
“
Iwi
l
lbebackbef
orey
ousl
eep”
“
Ha.
nangi
funaukuhambanawe”she
bur
sti
ntot
ear
sohl
ord.
“
I’
m cancel
l
ing”
“
Hay
igoKhami
nawi
l
lbeokay
”
“
She’
scr
yinggogo…”
“
Heyhey
,justgo”Isi
gh
“
Hav
eagoodni
ghtgogo”Lwenkosi
say
sashet
akesmyhandi
ntohi
s
“
Nightboy
”weheadoutanddr
iveof
f
“
Youl
ookst
unni
ngMi
ssMt
himkhul
u”
“
Thanky
ou”If
eel
abi
tof
fnowt
hat
Kamar
iawascr
yingandi
t’
sli
kegogo
canf
eel
thatbecauseshecal
l
smeand
t
ell
met
oenj
oyKamar
iai
snotcr
ying
now.
“
Thanky
ouMrNkosi
”Thedr
ivesi
sfi
l
led
wi
thsmal
lchatunt
ilwear
ri
vet
oour
dest
inat
ion.
“
Wear
eher
ecome”het
akesmyhandI
canheart
hesoundoft
heseawhi
ch
t
ell
smet
hatwear
eatt
hebeach
“
Wear
eatt
hebeach”
“
Yeah”Ir
eal
i
zet
hatmostourdat
eshas
al
way
sbeenher
ewel
lex
ceptt
het
ime
wehadpi
cni
catt
het
opoft
hemount
ain.
“
Youl
ovet
hesea”
“
Dur
h,I
’
m Lwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Ohy
eahofcour
se”I
'
mimpr
essed,
I
won’
tli
e,t
hesetupi
smagni
fi
cent
.I
al
way
ssayt
hatIl
oveev
erypi
ctur
ehe
pai
ntsi
nmymi
ndwhenev
erheex
plai
ns
somet
hingt
ome.Wehav
edi
nnerov
era
conv
ersat
ion.
“
Theper
fumesmel
l
sver
yni
ce,
Ilov
eit
”
“
I’
m gl
ady
oudo”Icanhearasmi
l
ein
hi
svoi
ce
“
Ilov
eyouMi
rawi
thev
eryoff
iberofmy
body
,you'
reev
ery
thi
ngandmor
eIwant
i
nthewoman.Iknowt
haty
oucl
ear
ly
hav
edoubt
sjudgi
ngbyt
hewayIhav
e
beent
reat
ingy
oubutIwantt
ogi
vey
ou
t
hebestofmebabyi
fonl
yyougi
veme
achancet
oshowy
ouhowmuchIl
ove
y
ou.Ihav
emessedupbi
gti
meIknow
butI
’
m beggi
ngy
ousweet
hear
tI’
m
goi
ngt
opr
ovei
ttoy
out
haty
ouar
emy
dr
eam comet
rue.Ihav
esomuchl
ovei
n
myhear
tandsoul
thatwi
l
llasty
oua
l
i
fet
imeandmyl
ovewi
l
lst
aywi
thy
our
soul
til
let
erni
tyandbey
ond”Thewor
ds
t
hatcomesoutoft
hisguy
smout
h
damny
ou’
dswearhe’
sreadi
ngt
hem
down.
“
Ilov
eyouLwenkosi
andy
ouknowt
hat
butIwon’
tset
tl
efory
ouri
l
ltr
eat
ment
,
I
’
m noty
ourdol
l
.Ihav
efeel
i
ngsl
i
keany
ot
herhuman.Youract
ionsj
ustpr
oved
t
omet
haty
ounotwor
thyofmyhear
t
becausey
oudon’
tknowhowt
otr
eati
t
l
i
keapr
eci
ouscar
go”
“
Youhav
eev
eryr
ightt
osayt
hatandI
under
standbutI
’
m beggi
ngy
oudol
l
face
j
ustonel
astchancet
hatal
lIask.
Ngi
ykucel
asphal
aphaungi
qomeekhay
a
kuday
iswaamasnacksi
mvut
hukuz
oba
ez
akho”Ichor
tl
e
“
I’
mtr
yingt
ocour
tyoudol
l
face,
don’
t
l
augh”
“
Ngez
imv
uthuz
amasnacksphoay
ngekey
ourcour
ti
ngi
swhack”Isay
l
aughi
ng
“
Uhl
ekol
akhol
i
wumz
wil
i
liez
indl
ebeni
z
ami
ngi
yat
hembi
saukut
hi
mawungangi
nikez
ait
hubangi
zohl
ezi
ngi
kuhl
eki
sanj
alo.Ngi
yacel
a
ndoni
yamanz
iungi
vumel
engi
tshal
e
i
mbewuy
othandoy
angunaphakade
enhl
i
zweni
yakho.Ngi
zokuphat
hisa
okweNdl
ovukaz
ileoy
iyo,
uthandol
wami
uz
oli
zwal
i
gij
i
mangi
sho
nangemi
thamboy
ozi
mbawakho.
Ngi
cel
aungi
khol
wemangi
thi
ngi
yakut
handangobal
okhokuy
iqi
niso
el
i
ngasoz
elaguquka.Ngi
yaz
iiz
enz
o
z
iyaphi
kakodwangi
zi
misi
l
engawe
ut
handoengi
nal
ongawel
uni
ngi
.Ngi
cel
a
ungi
khol
wemangi
thi
ngi
yakut
handa
ngobal
okhokuy
iqi
nisi
.Ngi
yaz
iiz
enz
o
z
iyaphi
kakodwangi
zi
misi
l
engawe
ut
handoengi
nal
ongawe
l
ungel
i
ngi
niswengi
shonanol
omhl
aba
i
mbal
a.Ngi
yakut
handamaShwaba”
(
yourl
aught
eri
sli
kebeaut
if
ulmel
odyi
n
myear
s,Ipr
omi
sei
fyougi
vemea
chance,
Iwi
l
lmakey
oul
aughev
ery
day
.
Pl
easegi
vemeachancet
opl
antaseed
ofanev
erl
ast
ingl
ovei
nyourhear
t
beaut
if
ul.Iwi
l
ltr
eaty
oul
i
ket
hequeen
t
haty
ouar
e,y
ou'
l
lfeel
myl
over
unni
ng
deepi
nyourner
ves.Pl
easebel
i
eveme
whenIsayIl
ovey
ou,
becauset
hati
sthe
t
rut
hthatwi
l
lremai
nfor
ever
.Iknowmy
act
ionsdon'
tagr
eebutI
’
m dr
awni
nto
y
ouev
ennotev
ent
hiswor
ldcan
measur
ethel
oveIhav
efory
ou.Il
ove
y
ouMaShwabada.
)OhwowI
’
mtounge
t
iedandabl
ushi
ngmess.Getagr
ipof
y
our
sel
fMi
ra!
“
uhm t
hehouri
sov
ernow.Thanky
ou
f
ordi
nner
”Heheav
esasi
gh
“
Justf
ewmor
emi
nut
espl
ease”
“
Itol
dyounj
eIhav
epl
ans,
Ionl
ydi
dyou
af
avor
”
“
Whatpl
ans,
wit
hwho”
“
Youdon’
tknowhi
m”
“
Him?
”
“
Yesweuset
ogot
othesameschool
”
“
SoIhav
ecompet
it
ion”Hegr
oanswi
th
f
rust
rat
ion
“
Isi
tri
ghtf
ormet
osayungamqomi
pl
ease”Il
augh
“
Noi
t’
swr
ong!
”
“
Iwi
l
ldr
ivey
out
her
ewher
eishet
aki
ng
y
ou”Igi
ggl
eit
’swor
kingandhecan’
t
ev
enhi
dei
t
“
Not
hankswear
efi
ne”
“
Heeengi
zomt
hakat
hadol
l
facest
ru
nasi
!”Ibur
sti
ntol
aught
er
“
Takemehomepl
ease”Hehel
psmeup
andpul
l
smei
nhi
sar
ms.Icanf
eel
his
br
eat
hecar
essi
ngmyf
ace.Ibr
eat
hei
n
hi
sint
oxi
cat
ingscent
.
“
Ilov
eyou”Hewhi
sper
sbr
ushi
ngmy
l
i
pswi
thhi
sfi
nger
“
Iknow”
“
Takemebackpl
ease”
“
Takemehomepl
ease”Hegr
oansand
l
etgoofmet
hent
akemyhandi
ntohi
s
aswemakeourwayt
ohi
scar
.He’
s
gr
oani
ngnonest
op,
all
theway
.Iwant
t
olaughathi
m butIcont
rol
mysel
f.I
knowhowhehat
esnotbei
ngi
ncont
rol
oft
hesi
tuat
ion,
hewi
l
lhav
etobest
rong
shame.Wear
ri
vehomeandhe
squeez
esmei
nhi
sar
msbr
eat
hingi
n
myscentbef
orepl
aci
ngapeckonmy
l
i
ps.
“
Utshel
elebhar
iyakhoukut
hii
gade
i
zi
nsumpay
ezwa”Il
augh
“
Izi
nsumbaz
ani
”
“
I’
m notj
oki
ngwhenIsayIwi
l
lbewi
tch
hi
m”Igi
ggl
e
“
ByeLwenkosi
andt
hanksonceagai
n”I
pl
antapeckonhi
scheekandgeti
nsi
de
t
hehouse.
“
Youar
eback”Iscr
eam wi
thf
ri
ght
“
I’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
tmeant
ost
art
le
y
ou.
..
howar
eyou”
“
I’
m okay
”
“
Howwasy
ourdat
e?”
“
Uhm i
twasokaymom”shepul
l
smet
o
herandhugsme.
“
Ilov
eyouMi
racl
e”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomom”
“
Youdo?
”
“
YesIl
ovey
oumom,
that
’snotgoi
ngt
o
change”
“
CanIsl
eepwi
thy
ou,
sincey
ouar
e
goi
ngt
omor
row”
“
Okay
”Shet
urnst
hel
i
ghtof
fandwe
wal
ktomybedwher
ewechangei
nto
pj
sandsl
i
pint
obed.
“
I’
m sor
rybaby
”shesay
srunni
ngher
f
inger
sonmyf
ace
“
Iknowmom,
I’
m sor
ryt
oo”
I
t'
sthenex
tdayt
hehousei
sbuz
zing,
I
’
m sur
etheyar
eher
etowi
shme
f
arewel
lbutIcanheart
her
e’sast
ret
ch
t
ent
,cat
eri
ng,
djandst
uffwhi
chi
s
conf
usi
ngme.
“
Okaycanany
onet
ell
mewhat
’sgoi
ng
onher
e”
“
BabyIt
houghtweshoul
ddoal
i
ttl
e
somet
hingf
ory
out
owel
comey
ouback
home”mom say
s
“
Oht
hanky
oumommybuty
oushoul
dn’
t
hav
e”
“
Thi
sisy
ourpar
tyandKam Kam,
Iwant
y
out
oenj
oybaby
”Ev
erycl
osef
ami
l
y
andf
ri
endsar
ri
veev
enGugui
sher
eand
I
’
m gr
atef
ul.St
ardi
dn’
tcomet
houghah
wel
lwhatcanIsay
.Thepar
tybegi
ns
wi
thf
ingerf
oodandf
ewspeechest
hat
l
eav
esmei
ntear
sespeci
all
ymymoms.
“
OkayOkaynowi
tst
imef
orpr
ezz
ies”
Guguscr
eams.Snoi
sthef
ir
stonet
o
gi
vemehergi
ft
.It
’sabi
gteddybear
“
Thanky
ousosomuchmunchki
n”we
hug
“
Ilov
eyouMi
ra”
“
Ilov
eyout
oobaby
”
“
MommyIal
sohav
epl
ezz
ifor
y
ou!
”scr
eamsmymoonl
i
ght
.
“
Wher
eisi
tmyl
ove”
“
Her
e”It
aket
hegi
ftbagandt
akeouta
mugt
hatengr
avedi
nbr
ail
l
e‘Thebest
mommyi
nthewhol
ewor
ld’
Ican’
tst
op
myt
ear
s
“
Oht
hanky
ousomuchmymoonl
i
ght
”
“
Don’
tcr
ymommy
”shewi
pesmyt
ear
s
wi
thhert
inyhands.Gugugotmea
l
i
nger
iel
olsi
l
lygi
rl
,Mom Zogotmea
v
oicecommandcl
ock,
itr
espondst
o
v
oicecommandandt
alksback.Il
ovei
t
i
t’
sbeaut
if
ul.Gogogotmeacomf
ort
er
t
hati
sper
sonal
i
zedwi
thmyname
ncooooi
ssobeaut
if
ul.Uncl
eKgotme
ani
Pad,
Lwenkosi
gotmebeaut
yspa
sessi
onatKakl
oofspa.Iwoul
dtake
any
oneIwantt
ogowi
th.I
t’
sseemsl
i
ke
ev
ery
oneknewaboutt
hispar
tyex
cept
me.TheMwangi
’
sgotmeanaudi
obook.
Guy
sI’
m ov
erf
loat
ingwi
thj
oy.Idi
dn’
t
knowI
’
mlov
edl
i
ket
hispeopl
e.
“
Thanky
ousomuchguy
s”
“
Wel
li
t’
sti
mef
ormypr
ezz
ie.Comesi
s”
mom say
s.Iwonderwho’
sshet
alki
ng
t
o.
“
Hel
l
oev
ery
oneI
’
m Mr
sKhet
hokuhl
e
Mngomez
uluI
’
m sur
ey’
al
lknowme.
Wel
l4y
ear
sagowehadasi
ngi
ng
compet
it
ionandourbel
ovedMi
racl
e
wonaf
tert
hatshedi
sappear
edonus.I
t
r
eal
l
ysaddenedusbutl
etsnotdwel
lon
t
hepastandbehappyt
hatourgi
rli
s
saf
etoshowushert
alent
.SoI
’
m her
e
onbehal
fofSAT,
that
'sMi
ra’
srecor
d
deal
isst
il
lwai
ti
ngf
orheraf
teral
lshe
woni
tfai
randsquar
e.Mr
sKhumal
o
t
hanky
ouf
orcomi
ngt
hrough”Ev
ery
one
er
upt
swi
thcheer
.Soshewentt
o
Johannesbur
gtobegt
hem t
ogi
veme
backmyr
ecor
ddeal
sot
hatIdon’
tgot
o
Keny
a.
“
Babypl
easeacceptmygi
ft
”I’
m cr
ying
messr
ightnow.
“
Usi
l
emama”Ther
e’sl
aught
er
“
Pret
typl
ease,
mybaby
”
“
Pleasenunuz
a”
“
Mommysayy
es!
”
“
PleaseDol
l
face!
”Iknowt
hatonei
s
speaki
ngf
orhi
msel
fmor
e.Theyar
eal
l
gangi
nguponmenow.
“
OkayOkay
,Iaccept
!”
“
Yeeeer
yyy
yii
i
ii
”thescr
eamsf
il
lst
he
t
ent
.Mom wi
pesmyt
ear
sandhugs
“
Yousuchasneakywoman”shegi
ggl
es
“
Ilov
eyout
oo!
”
“
Yoursi
ster
sar
eher
eNono,
Ntombi
camewi
thherhusbandandherki
ds.
”
Gogosay
s,Ihearmymom bur
sti
ntoa
l
oudsobwhi
l
eSnoscr
eams
“
Ayandawhatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e!”
“
Yay
awhyar
eyouher
e”Lwenkosi
say
s
nex
ttome
“
Whatdoy
oumeanwhyam Iher
e,my
par
ent
swer
einv
itedbyGogot
o..
.no.
.no
t
hisi
saj
oker
ight
”
“
Her
e’st
hisboywhoent
eredmykr
aal
wi
thoutmyconsent
!!
”.Lor
dpl
easel
et
t
hisnotbewhatIt
hinki
tis.
CHAPTER53

Theangeri
nthi
smani
sev
ident
,vei
ns
ar
epoopi
ngonhi
sfor
ehead.Iswearhe
wi
l
leatmeal
i
ve.
“
Nguboy
engwecal
m down”
“
Don'
ttel
lmet
ocal
m downNt
ombi
,thi
s
boyt
hinksj
ustbecausehe’
sacel
ebr
it
y
hewoul
ddoashepl
easeswi
thmy
daught
er!
!”
“
mkhweny
anecal
m downpl
ease”Mi
ra’
s
gogosay
s.Ihav
enodoubtt
hatt
hisman
i
sAy
anda’
sfat
hershel
ooksl
i
keherdad.
“
Let
’sgeti
nthehouseanddi
scusst
his”
“
Uhm l
et’
sgett
hispar
tyst
art
eddj
ay
ishei
-number
”Gugusay
str
yingt
o
cov
erupal
lthi
sunnecessar
ydr
ama.
Ay
andaandIj
oint
heel
der
sint
hel
i
ving
r
oom.
“
I’
m nothappyabouthowy
ouj
ust
wal
kedi
nmydaught
er’
shouseand
causedunnecessar
ydr
amar
uini
ngmy
gr
anddaught
er’
spar
tymkhweny
ane”
“
I’
m sor
rymama,
Iact
edoutofanger
.
Mr
sKhumal
oI’
mreal
l
ysor
ry”Mom
Bonganodsherheadasshewi
pesher
t
ear
s.I
’
m sur
ethi
smomentr
ightnow
f
orher
,it
’semot
ional
,seei
nghersi
ster
s
t
hatshel
astsaw23y
ear
sago.
“
Ihear
dyout
alki
ngaboutakr
aal
bei
ng
ent
eredndodana”Gogosay
s
“
YesMama,
thi
sboyher
emademy
daught
erf
all
inl
ovewi
thhi
m and
ent
eredmykr
aal
wit
houtmyconsent
t
henhedi
tchedmydaught
erl
i
keat
oil
et
paper
!Heusedmydaught
ernow
ev
ery
onei
slaughi
ngatheronsoci
al
net
wor
k!”Il
ookatAy
andawhoi
s
weepi
ngsi
l
ent
ly
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
whatdoy
ouhav
eto
sayf
ory
our
sel
f”Dadsay
slooki
ngatme.
Icl
earmyt
hroat
“
Uhm Iwantt
oapol
ogi
zet
oMrJel
eand
Mr
sJel
efort
hewayIhav
etr
eat
edt
hei
r
daught
er.Ihav
enocont
rol
ofwhot
akes
pi
ctur
esandpostt
hem onsoci
al
net
wor
ks.Asf
orent
eri
ngy
ourkr
aal
,I
’m
nott
hef
ir
stonet
oent
eri
tbaba.If
ound
i
tal
readyopen”
“
Huuuh”al
ley
esar
eonhernowkant
i
di
dn’
tshet
ell
them t
het
rut
h?SnapI
shoul
dn’
thav
esol
dheroutbutshe
shoul
dhav
ewar
nedme.
“
Ayandai
sitt
rue?
”Hermom shout
s
“
He’
sly
ingmamahe’
stheonet
hat
br
okemyv
irgi
nit
y”Il
aughr
eal
l
yhar
d
andev
ery
onei
slooki
ngatmel
i
keI
’
m
cr
azy
.
“
Ayandat
ell
them t
het
rut
h”
“
Whatt
rut
h?Youar
etheonet
hatbr
oke
myv
irgi
nit
y!”Shebur
sti
ntot
ear
shai
bo
madodangi
yal
i
ngwa
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
!”
“
DadIswearandIdon’
tgetwhywe
hav
etosi
tdownandt
alkaboutt
hisasi
f
If
orcedherorImadeherpr
egnant
.I
nev
erf
orcedhert
oany
thi
ngandIf
ound
hernotpur
esheknowsdeepdowni
n
herhear
t”Ay
andabur
sti
ntoadr
amat
ic
cr
y,wowIdi
dn’
tknowshecanact
.
“
Stopcr
yingandt
alkAy
anda”y
ell
sher
mom.Yay
aget
supandr
unsaway
cr
ying
“
Amen!
”Mi
ra’
sGogosay
s,Icanseet
he
di
sappoi
ntmenti
nAy
anda’
spar
ent
sand
t
heyar
eoutofwor
ds.
“
SowenaLwandl
elwenkosi
whi
chone
ar
eyouwi
thkant
i?I
sitMi
raorAy
anda”I
l
ookdownandcl
earmyt
hroat
.Mi
ra’
s
gogoasks
“
Noneoft
hem”i
t’
sthehonestt
rut
h.
Mi
rahav
entgi
venmeachanceand
Ay
andaIbr
okeupwi
thhery
est
erday
.
“
Ithi
nki
tbet
teri
t’
sst
ayst
hatwaysi
nce
t
heset
woar
esi
ster
s.”Il
ookatt
his
womanwhohasbeenqui
teal
lal
ong
andnowshe’
sspi
tt
ingshi
t.
“
Wit
hal
lduer
espectmama,
Idi
dn’
t
knowt
heyar
esi
ster
ssoIcan’
tbe
puni
shedf
orsomet
hingIdi
dn’
tknow.
”
“
Youwantt
ocausemor
etensi
ont
othe
si
ster
s!”
“
Wecantpuni
sht
hesechi
l
drenf
ora
si
tuat
iont
heyhadnocont
rol
of.I
f
Lwandl
elwenkosi
want
sMi
rat
hen
Ay
andahav
etounder
standandmov
e
on.Hewasher
sfi
rstv
ele”mom Bonga
say
s
“
Ohsomydaught
er’
sfeel
i
ngsar
enot
consi
der
ed?
”
“
Ofcour
senotNt
ombi
buti
ftheyl
ove
eachot
her
,wecan’
tst
andi
nthei
rway
.
Lett
hem be,
Ayandawi
l
lfi
ndsomeone
el
sewhowi
l
llov
eher
”
“
Wear
efami
l
yNokubongashoul
dn’
twe
st
ickwi
theachot
her
.Mi
ramust
n’t
chooseaboyov
erhersi
ster
.Ift
heyl
ose
hi
mtheymustl
osehi
m bot
h.Theyar
e
si
ster
stheyshoul
dn’
tal
l
owat
hir
d
per
sont
ocomebet
weent
hem kodwa
wenaIdon’
tex
pecty
out
ounder
stand
becausey
ousl
eptwi
thy
oursi
ster
’s
husband’
s.I
’
m sur
eMi
rai
sahoel
i
ke
y
ou”
“
Ntombi
!!
”Mi
ra’
sgogoshout
sasMom
Bongachuckl
esandget
supbef
ore
wal
ki
ngout
.Mypar
ent
sandIex
cused
our
sel
vesandgi
veaf
ami
l
yaspace.I
l
ookf
ormydol
l
faceandf
indherchi
l
li
ng
wi
thguguanddr
inki
ngwi
ne.
“
GugucanIst
eal
herf
orasecond”
“
Sur
e”
“
Funani
”Mi
rasl
ursshe’
sdr
unkal
ready
.
“
Canwet
alkpl
ease”
“
I’
mti
redoft
alki
ng,
tal
ki
ng,
tal
ki
ngI
wantt
ogetsl
oshed,
doy
ouhearme.
Ngi
funaukudakwangi
bemnandi
”she
bur
sti
ntol
aught
er.Iscoopherupand
wal
ktomycarwi
thher
.Ibuckl
eherup
andj
ogt
omysi
det
hendr
ivet
oa
secl
udedpl
ace.Icar
ryhert
otheback
seatandmakeherst
raddl
esme.
“
Sthandwasami
”
“
I’
m noty
ourst
handwasakho”She
st
art
ssi
ngi
ng,
adr
unkMi
rai
sfunny
.
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Babywami
”shewr
apsherar
msar
ound
myneck
“
Doy
out
hinkI
’
m cur
sed,
Imeanmyl
i
fe
hasnopeaceatal
l
.”
“
NobabyIdon’
tthi
nky
ouar
ecur
sed.
Li
fei
sli
ket
hati
twi
l
lgetbet
tery
ouwi
l
l
see”
“
Youl
oveher
?”
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Wear
esi
ster
showar
ewegoi
ngt
o
handl
ethi
sI’
m sur
eshehat
esme”
“
Wedi
dn’
tknowbaby
,shehast
o
under
stand”
“
Idon’
tthi
nkI
twi
l
lmakemef
eel
bet
ter
t
hatIt
ooky
ouf
rom mysi
ster
”
“
Youwer
emi
nef
ir
st”
“
Sti
l
lit
’sdoesn’
tfeel
right
.It
hinki
t’
s
beenconf
ir
medt
haty
ouandIwi
l
lnev
er
bet
oget
her
”myhear
tdr
opst
omy
st
omach
“
Mir
adon’
tdot
hatpl
ease”Ipl
antki
sses
al
lov
erherf
ace
“
Isshewi
l
li
ngt
olety
ougo,
Iwantno
dr
amai
nmyl
i
fe”
“
Yesbabypl
easegi
veusachance”Ipul
l
herf
acecl
oseandki
ssherl
i
ps,
Ican
t
ast
ewi
nei
nherl
i
pswhi
chmakest
he
ki
sser
oti
c.Isl
antmyheadpour
ingmy
hear
tint
otheki
ss.Myhandsf
indt
hei
r
wayunderherdr
essandsqueez
esher
but
tocks.Icanf
eel
mydi
ckgr
owi
ng
har
dinmypant
s,Igr
oanasshegr
inds
mybul
ge.Isl
i
demyhandunder
neat
h
andcupsherpussyov
erherpant
iesshe
l
etoutasof
tmoan.Iputmyhandi
nher
pant
iesandt
hef
ir
stf
li
ckofmyf
ingeron
hercl
i
tmakesherj
erkbutIhol
dheri
n
pl
acewhi
l
econt
inui
ngwor
kingonher
cl
i
t.She’
smoani
ngandbi
ti
ngherl
i
ps
l
ooki
ngal
lsex
yasf
uck.Ishov
etwo
f
inger
sinherdr
ippi
ngwetcuntand
f
ingerf
uckherunt
ilherbodyshudder
s
wi
thpl
easur
eandex
plodeonmyf
inger
s.
Iwi
thdr
awmyf
inger
sandsuckonher
j
uicesont
hem,
shet
ast
ebet
tert
han
any
thi
ngIhav
eev
ert
ast
edi
nmyl
i
fe.
“
Ihav
econdomsi
nthegl
ovebox
”
“
Don’
twor
rywewi
l
luset
hem af
ter3
y
ear
s”IdoubtIwi
l
lbest
il
lal
i
vebyt
hen
bl
uebal
l
swoul
dhav
elongki
l
ledme.Eh
kul
ukhuni
ukubai
ndoda!

Seei
ngmysi
ster
saf
teral
lthesey
ear
s
br
oughtt
ear
sinmyey
est
hent
he
husbandhadt
ocauseunnecessar
y
dr
ama.Ican’
tbel
i
evet
hatwehadt
osi
t
downanddi
scusschi
l
dren’
ssexl
i
fe.I
t’
s
notl
i
keAy
andai
spr
egnant
.Chi
l
dren
l
oset
hei
rvi
rgi
nit
ylef
tri
ghtandcent
er,
t
her
e’snobi
gdeal
real
l
yev
eni
fwecan
shoutt
hev
irgi
nit
ywon’
tber
epai
red.I
don’
tunder
standhowdot
heyal
l
owt
hei
r
daught
ert
odat
ewhi
l
etheydon’
twant
hert
oloseherv
irgi
nit
ynotunl
essi
fthey
di
dn’
tknow.I
t’
sev
erypar
ent
swi
sht
hat
ourdaught
erscoul
dst
aypur
eti
l
l
mar
ri
agebutweknowt
hechancesar
e
v
erysl
i
m especi
all
yoncet
heyst
art
dat
ingmi
ghtaswel
lbeopent
othem
aboutsex
.Theyar
egoi
ngt
odoi
tvel
e
r
atherpr
epar
ethem f
orconsequences.

Theex
cit
ementIhadseei
ngmysi
ster
s
f
ort
hef
ir
stt
imei
n24y
ear
svani
shed
t
hemomentNt
ombi
air
edoutmydi
rt
y
l
aundr
yli
ket
hat
.Iseet
hatshe'
sst
il
lsel
f
r
ight
eous.Icoul
dn’
tst
ayt
her
ebecauseI
wasgoi
ngt
osaysomet
hingIwoul
d
r
egr
et.Ial
mostl
ostmydaught
erduet
o
t
hewor
dsIsaywhenI
’
m angr
y,Ihav
e
r
eal
i
zedt
hehar
m mywor
ddoeswhen
I
’
m angr
yhenceIchoset
ojustgetout
andt
akeadeepbr
eat
h.If
eel
hishands
wi
pingmyt
ear
sthatIwasn’
tawar
e
wer
efal
l
ing.I
’
mint
hebackr
oom si
tt
ing
ont
hebedhemusthav
efol
l
owedme.

“
Bakwenz
ani
”(whatdi
dtheydot
oyou)I
openmyey
esandt
heymeethi
s
concer
nedpai
r
“
Not
hing”If
akeasmi
l
e
“
Don’
ttel
lmey
ouar
ecr
yingf
ornot
hing”
“
I’
m ov
erwhel
medt
hat
’sal
l
”
“
Bengi
khumbul
i
le”
“
Imi
ssedy
out
oo”
“
Buty
ouwer
en’
tanswer
ingmycal
l
s,I
waswor
ri
edabouty
ouBonga”
“
I’
m sor
rybutI
’
mfi
ne”Hecupsmyf
ace
andki
ssesme
“
Youhur
tmeBonga,
thewayi
tssoeasy
f
ory
out
oletmego,
breaksmyhear
t.I
f
oundmy
sel
faski
ngi
fImean
somet
hingt
oyou.If
eel
li
keI
’
minl
ove
al
onenj
eandshoul
dther
ebet
ough
t
imesbet
weenus,
youwi
l
lleav
emej
ust
l
i
ket
hat
,wi
thoutt
hinki
ngt
wice”my
hear
tsi
nks
“
Akusi
l
oiqi
nisol
eloKhuz
ani
”(That
’snot
t
het
rut
h)
“
Angaz
imi
nakwaz
iwena”(
Idon’
tknow
y
ouar
etheonewhoknows)Icuphi
s
f
aceandl
ookdeepi
nhi
sey
es.
“
I’
m sor
ryf
ormaki
ngy
ouf
eel
thatway
.I
l
ovey
ou,
Ireal
l
ydoandIwon’
tjustgi
ve
upony
ou,
onus,
Ipr
omi
se”Her
elease
asi
ghandpr
esseshi
sfor
eheadagai
nst
mi
ne.West
ayl
i
ket
hatf
oramoment
bef
oreki
ssi
ng.Theki
ssi
ssensual
and
deep.
“
Nono!
”
“
M..
ma”Imur
muragai
nstt
heki
ss
“
Comesi
s,l
et’
stal
k”Igetupandhead
out
,Dudui
shappyt
oseemebut
Nt
ombi
isst
il
lsoursoIl
etherbe.The
r
estoft
hedaygoeswel
l
.

-
Shel
ookssof
rai
lIdon’
tunder
stand
whathappened.Onemi
nut
eshe’
sokay
t
henex
tshe’
sadmi
tt
edt
othehospi
tal
.
I
t’
sbeen4day
ssi
ncemymom gother
e.
Thedoct
orssayshehadami
l
dst
roke
andshe’
sluckyact
ual
l
ybecausei
tcoul
d
hav
egotwor
se.Idon’
tknowwhatI
woul
ddoi
fIwer
etol
oset
hiswoman.
She’
stheonl
ypar
entIhav
esi
ncemy
f
atherl
efthi
sseedonmymom’
swomb
andv
ani
shedi
ntot
hinai
r.Ihadan
i
dent
ical
twi
nbr
otherwhodi
edy
ear
s
ago.Hi
sdeat
hishaunt
ingmeev
ery
si
ngl
edaybecausehet
ookmybul
l
et.
Thepeopl
ethatki
l
ledhi
mthoughthe
wasme.Ihav
eanugl
ypastandI
’
m not
pr
oudoft
het
hingsIhav
edonebutIhad
t
odoi
ttopr
ovi
def
ormymom and
br
other
.It
’shasal
way
sbeent
he3ofus
wel
lunt
ilmybr
otherdi
edandl
eftus
wi
thhi
stwoboy
swhoar
eli
kemyown.
Theyl
i
vewi
tht
hei
rmot
her
sbutt
hey
v
isi
tusany
time.Af
tert
hedeat
hofmy
br
otherIst
oppedt
hatl
i
feandt
hat
'show
ImetKhumal
o.
It
akeherhandandki
ssi
tshebl
i
nksher
ey
esopenandl
ooksatme
“
Mpendul
omf
anawami
”
“
Youscar
edmemama”
“
I’
m sor
rymyboy
”
“
Whathappenedt
hedoct
orsai
dyouhad
ami
l
dst
roke,
whati
sst
ressi
ngy
ou?
”
“
Youruncl
es”
“
Baf
unani
labo,
didn’
ttheyt
urnt
hei
r
backony
ouwheny
ouwer
epr
egnant
andal
one!
”
“
Cal
m downmyson”It
akeahuge
br
eat
he.
“
Itol
dthem abouty
ourdaught
erandt
he
l
obol
anegot
iat
ions.Theydon’
twantt
o
r
epr
esenty
ouandt
heydon’
twantt
odo
t
hecer
emony
,theysayImustgof
ind
y
ourf
atheranddoi
tther
e”
“
Mawhydi
dyouev
engot
her
e,t
hese
peopl
edon’
twantus”
“
Boywehav
etodot
hingsaccor
dingl
yif
y
ougetmar
ri
edwi
thouti
nvol
vi
ngt
hem
y
ourmar
ri
agewon’
tber
ecogni
zedby
t
heancest
ors.Kamar
iahast
obe
i
ntr
oducedt
otheancest
orssot
hatt
hey
canpr
otecther
”
“
Soourl
i
veshav
etobeonhol
dbecause
ofy
ourcr
uel
brot
her
s”
“
Iwi
l
lbegt
hem agai
n”
“
Stopbeggi
ngt
hem.Iwi
l
lmar
rygugui
n
cour
t,t
hatwaywedon’
thav
etoi
nvol
ve
ancest
orsandev
ery
thi
ngasf
orKamar
ia
wedon’
thav
etodoanycer
emony
.I’
m
t
urni
ng30y
ear
sthi
syearandIhav
e
nev
erdoneacer
emonybutI
’
m okay
”
“
Lookwhathappenedt
oyourbr
other
.”
“
Sti
l
lmamaDl
ami
nii
syoursur
namenot
dad’
s”shebr
eat
hsoutl
oudl
y
“
Let
sst
opt
alki
ngaboutt
hisnow,
Idon’
t
wantt
ost
ressy
ou.
”Shesqueez
esmy
handt
ight
lyandIwat
chherf
all
asl
eep.
Ther
e’snot
hingpai
nful
asbei
ngaman
whoknowsnot
hingabouthi
sroot
s.I
t
f
eel
sli
key
ouar
edi
rect
ionl
ess.Ir
ecei
ve
acal
lfr
om mydoct
orandshet
ell
sme
t
hatshegott
heDNAr
esul
tsandt
he
goodt
hingi
sthatshe’
snoti
nher
sur
ger
yri
ghtnowbuther
esoIki
ssmy
mom’
sfor
eheadandf
indmywayt
oher
of
fi
ce.Iknockonceandshel
etsmei
n
“
Hidoc”
“
Hel
l
oMpendul
owhyar
eyouar
eher
e”
“
Mom wasadmi
tt
ed4day
sback”
“
OhI
’
m sor
rysi
tdown”Igr
abachai
rand
si
tdown
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thmama”
“
Mil
dst
roke”
“
I’
mreal
l
ytosor
ryt
oheart
hatbutshe’
s
i
ngoodhandsher
e”
“
Thanky
ou,
soy
ougott
her
esul
ts”
“
Yes”Ihav
enodoubtt
hatKamar
iai
s
mi
net
heconnect
ionbet
weenusi
sthe
ev
idenceenoughbutIj
usthadt
obe
sur
esi
ncemyf
iancéesuggest
edi
t.She
passesmet
heenv
elope,
Iopeni
tand
t
akeoutt
hedocumenti
nsi
debef
ore
r
eadi
ngi
t.Ishakemyheadi
ndi
sbel
i
ef,
t
hiscan’
tbet
rue
“
Arey
ousur
ethesear
ether
esul
t”
“
YesMpendul
o”
“
Haymay
beIdon’
tunder
standEngl
i
sh”I
gi
vei
ttoher
“
I’
m sosor
ryMpendul
othechi
l
disnot
y
our
s”Di
ff
erentemot
ionsengul
fsme
andf
eel
mywhol
ebodyshi
ver
ing.
“
Somet
hingi
snotr
ighther
e!”
“
Theset
estar
eaccur
ate,
I’
mreal
l
y
sor
ry”It
aket
her
esul
tandheadout
.I
geti
nmycarandt
hrowt
hem ont
he
passengerseatandbur
ymyheadont
he
st
eer
ingwheel
.Icanf
eel
tear
s
t
hreat
eni
ngt
ocomeout
.Howcoul
d
Mi
radot
hist
ome!

I
’
m comi
ngf
rom v
arsi
tyandi
tlooksl
i
ke
Soxi
snothome.I
’
mti
redIwantt
osl
eep,
Iwi
l
lcookwhenIwakeuporIwoul
djust
or
deri
n.Themomentmyheadhi
tthe
pi
l
lowmyphoner
ings.
“
Doc”
“
It
’sdone”
“
Howi
she?
”
“
He’
sbr
okenhewassosur
ethat
Kamar
iai
shi
s”myhear
tsi
nks
“
Guguar
eyoust
il
lther
e”
“
Yeuhm y
es”
“
Hey
,youdi
dwhaty
ouhadt
odot
osav
e
y
ourmar
ri
age”
“
He’
ssupposet
obeangr
ynot
hear
tbr
oken.Thel
astt
hingIwanti
sto
hur
thi
m”
“
Don’
twor
ryI
’
m sur
eri
ghtnowhei
son
hi
swayt
otheKhumal
oresi
dence.What
hav
ethoset
wohav
ebeenupt
o?”
“
Ihav
en’
tvi
sit
edMi
rasi
nceherpar
ty”
“
What
!Why
?”
“
Ihav
ebeenbusyatschool
.Iwi
l
lgosee
herandf
ishwhat
everi
nfor
mat
iony
ou
wantev
ent
houghIdoubtMi
raknows
any
thi
ngabouthermom’
srel
ati
onshi
p
wi
thLwandl
e’
suncl
e”
“
Yougot
tat
ryhar
dergi
rl
y,Ihav
edone
par
toney
oual
sohav
etodel
i
ver
!”
“
Iknow,
don’
tshout
”
“
Tomor
rowIwanty
out
ogi
veme
somet
hingby
e”
“
Bye”Ihangupandsi
gh.ThedayIwent
t
oDrMkhwanaz
itochecki
fIwas
pr
egnantshesai
dsomet
hingIt
hought
wasdumb‘
ever
ythi
nghappensf
ort
he
r
easonIbel
i
evey
oucomi
ngher
eal
so
hav
ear
eaon’
unt
ilIf
oundwhatshe
meant
.
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayLeaanLul
eka
Mnguni
&HappyBi
rt
hdayZel
ulekoNdi
nisa

CHAPTER54
“
I’
m comi
ng!
!!
”Iscr
eam asIdr
agmy
sel
f
t
othedoor
.I’
m pi
ssed,
whycan’
tpeopl
e
j
ustl
eav
emeal
onemaan.Iopent
he
doorandAunt
yPor
ti
amakesherwayi
n
andpul
l
smet
oherar
ms.
“
Ohy
oupoort
hing,
Ihear
dwhat
happened.I
’
mreal
l
ysor
ry”
“
I’
mfi
neAunt
y”
“
Youdon’
tlookf
ine”Shel
etsgoofme
andki
ssesmycheek.Il
eadhert
othe
l
i
vingr
oom andweset
tl
eont
hecouch.I
knowIl
ookhor
ri
bleIhav
ebeencooped
upi
nmybedr
oom cr
yingev
ersi
ncet
hat
dayIr
anoutoft
hathouse.Say
ingI
’
m
shockedt
hatourmot
her
sar
esi
ster
s
whi
chmakesussi
ster
swoul
dbean
under
stat
ement
.Ial
way
sknewgogo
had3daught
ersandt
hel
astbor
nran
awayf
rom homebutt
heynev
ert
oldus
why
.Nev
eri
nmywi
l
destdr
eamshadI
t
houghtMi
racoul
dbemyl
ongl
ost
aunt
’sdaught
er.HowImi
ssedt
hat
beat
sme,
Mir
alooksl
i
kemkhul
u.
“
It
’samessAunt
y.Mom anddadar
e
f
uri
ous.Lwandl
enol
ongerwantme,
he
want
sher
”Ibur
sti
ntot
ear
s
“
OhbabyI
’
m sor
ry”shepul
l
smet
oher
bosom andIwetherbl
ousewi
thmy
t
ear
s.Myhear
tissor
eIf
eel
li
keI
’
m
suf
focat
ing.
“
Ist
il
ll
ovehi
m somuchAunt
ybutaf
ter
l
yi
ngl
i
ket
hatt
oourpar
ent
s,Ican’
tev
en
f
acehi
m”
“
KodwanaweAy
andawhydi
dyoul
i
e
andwhyy
oudi
dn’
tyout
ell
met
hat
Lwandl
elwenkosi
isnott
heonet
hat
br
okey
ourv
irgi
nit
y”
“
Iwasashamedt
hatI
’
veal
readysl
ept
wi
tht
woguy
s,Aunt
y”
“
Ther
e’snot
hingt
obeashamedof
sweet
hear
t,y
oushoul
dhav
ejustt
old
t
het
rut
handav
oidal
lthi
smor
ti
fi
cat
ion,
nowi
tlooksl
i
key
ouar
easl
utt
hat
sl
eepsar
ound”
“
Idi
dn’
twantt
hem t
obemor
e
di
sappoi
ntedt
hant
heyal
readywer
e”
“
I’
m sor
rymybaby
,don’
tcr
y”
“
Yousai
dyouwi
l
ltel
lmehowt
oremi
nd
hi
m whyhechoseme.Idon’
twantt
o
l
osehi
m”
“
He’
snotwor
thi
t,l
ethi
m go”
“
Ican’
t,
Ilov
ehi
m”
“
Ithoughthel
ovesy
ouAy
andabuti
t’
s
cl
earhedoesn’
t.Youwi
l
lfi
ndsomeone
el
semydearf
ocusony
ourst
udi
esr
ight
now.Theonef
ory
ouwi
l
lcome”Ishake
myheadnoasIcr
yloudl
y.Myhear
t
can’
tacceptt
hat
,Lwandl
eandIbel
ong
t
oget
her
,Il
ovehi
m somuch,
hei
sthe
ai
rthatIbr
eat
he.
-

Ihav
ebeendr
eadi
ngt
hisdaybuti
t’
s
f
inal
l
yhappeni
ng,
I’
mtr
yinghar
dnott
o
cr
ybutt
hesebl
oodyt
ear
srol
loutofmy
cheeks.
“
Don’
tcr
ymybaby
”
“
Idon’
twanty
out
ogomama”
“
Iwi
l
lvi
sitbaby
,Ihopebyt
het
imeI
comebacky
ouwi
l
lal
l
owmet
ocome
wi
thy
ourf
ather
”nowoman,
nowy
ou
ar
epushi
ngi
t!
“
Dudu,
itwasni
cehav
ingy
oumt
aka
mah.
”Isqueez
eheri
nmyar
msf
ordear
l
i
fe.Dudui
smyel
destsi
ster
,Nt
ombi
is
t
hesecondandI
’
mthey
oungest
.Wear
e
al
mostt
hesameageact
ual
l
y.Dudui
s
48y
ear
s,Nt
ombi
is47andI
’
m 46,
yep
daddi
dn’
tgi
vemymom achancet
o
br
eat
hehescor
edev
eryy
ear
.
“
Youguy
sshoul
dcomeandv
isi
tmei
n
Johannesbur
g”shesay
sasshepul
l
s
back
“
Ohy
es,
wewi
l
l”I
’
m gl
adt
hatmy
daught
erwi
l
lbei
nsaf
ehandswhenshe
got
oJohannesbur
gregar
dingher
musi
ccar
eer
.It
hinkherl
i
fewi
l
lbemor
e
basedi
nJohannesbur
gthanher
enow
andI
’
m sor
eli
evedt
hatshewi
l
lbe
st
ayi
ngwi
thmysi
ster
.DuduandIhav
e
al
way
sbeencl
osewher
easNt
ombi
and
Ial
way
shadt
hosesi
l
lysi
bli
ngs’
squabbl
es.Mom uset
osayi
t’
sbecause
si
yal
amanabutshe’
sthegr
eatsi
ster
mi
nushersel
f-
ri
ght
eousat
ti
tude.She
l
eftwi
thherf
ami
l
ythatdaybutDudu
st
ayedbehi
ndf
oraf
ewday
s.I
t’
sbeen
ni
cecat
chi
ngupwi
thher
,she’
smar
ri
ed
t
oabi
l
li
onai
rehusbandwhoowns
busi
nessesandshehas3chi
l
dren.Two
gi
rl
sandoneboywho’
sact
ual
l
ythe
husband’
ssonf
rom hi
spr
evi
ous
mar
ri
age.Theyseem t
obeahappy
f
ami
l
y,I
’
mreal
l
yhappyf
ormysi
ster
s
especi
all
yforNt
ombi
becauseunl
i
keme
andDudushegother
sel
fabEddegr
ee.
Atl
eastf
rom mymom’
swomboneof
usi
seducat
edphel
aont
hesecond
wi
fe’
ssi
deThembi
nkosi
who’
sthe
el
destont
hatsi
dei
sachar
ter
ed
account
antandt
hey
oungoneofwhi
chI
di
dn’
tknowabouti
sasoci
alwor
ker
.
Appar
ent
lyshe’
sMi
ra’
sage,
so
t
echni
cal
l
yThembi
nkosi
isouronl
y
br
other
.HowIwoul
dhav
elov
edt
ohav
e
anol
derbr
othert
opr
otectmebuthe
wasnotamanenought
ost
andupt
o
dadev
ent
houghIcoul
dseet
hathe
di
dn’
tli
ket
hewaydadwast
reat
ingus.
“
Wher
e’sMi
ra?
”Mom asks
“
I’
m her
egogo”shesay
sdr
aggi
ngher
f
eett
owar
dsuswi
thRockyi
nfr
ontof
her
.She’
slookshor
ri
ble,
hernosei
sred
andherey
esar
egl
i
steni
ngwi
tht
ear
s.
“
Youl
ookhor
ri
blemybaby
”
“
Ifeel
li
keshi
t!
”
“
Hai
boMi
ra,
mindy
ourl
anguage”
“
I’
m sor
rymommy
”If
eel
herf
orehead
andshe’
sbur
ning
“
Yourt
emper
atur
eishi
ghbaby
,It
hink
weshoul
dgowi
thgogoandy
ouraunt
andpassbyt
hehospi
tal
toseeZo”
“
Okay
….gogoIwi
l
lmi
ssy
ousomuch,
pl
easecal
lmeev
eryday
”Mi
rasay
s
causi
ngmymom t
osmi
l
ewi
del
y
“
Iwi
l
lnununz
akagogo”shepul
l
sher
gr
anddaught
eri
nherar
msandki
sses
herf
orehead.
“
Mom Dudu,
itwasni
cemeet
ingand
knowi
ngy
ou”
“
Itwasal
sol
ovel
ytomeety
oumy
dar
li
ng.
”Sheembr
acemydaught
er
“
Nex
tweekIhav
etogot
oMZr
ecor
ds,
I
hopey
oudon’
tmi
ndi
fIcr
ashaty
our
house”
“
Mind?Don’
tbesi
l
ly!Iwi
l
lbewai
ti
ngf
or
y
ouandIwanty
out
omeetmychi
l
dren.
”
”
Youar
egoi
ngwi
thmemommyr
ight
”
Kam Kam asks
“
Yesmybaby
”Weshar
ehugsand
ki
ssesf
ort
hel
astt
imet
henweheadout
andgeti
ntoourcar
sthendr
iveof
fal
ong
t
hewaywedr
ivesepar
ate.Il
etouta
hugesi
gh,
I’
m goi
ngt
omi
sst
hem
especi
all
ymom i
twasl
ovel
yhav
ingher
war
mth,
lov
e,andcar
e.Mot
her
’sl
ovei
s
ev
ery
thi
ng.
“
Mommyi
shotdr
agongr
anny
,It
hink
she’
ssi
ck”say
sKam Kam Il
ookather
i
nther
earmi
rr
orshe’
sbusyt
ouchi
ng
hermom’
sfor
ehead.
“
Wear
egoi
ngt
othedoct
orcupcake”
“
Didy
ouheart
hatmommy
..
.y
ouwi
l
lbe
okayy
ezwa”sheki
sseshermom’
sli
ps
andnest
leherheadonherchest
“
Thanky
oumybaby
”Mi
rasay
s.Ideci
de
t
oletZoknowt
hatwear
eonourwayt
o
her
.Oncewear
ri
vewemakeourwayi
n
andenqui
rerf
ir
st,
onourwayt
oZo’
s
of
fi
cewebumpedi
ntoKhosi
“
Nokubonga”
“
Hi”If
akeasmi
l
e
“
Youhav
ebeaut
if
ulki
ds”
“
Thanky
ou”
“
It
’ssuchashamet
hatMi
radoesn’
tsee,
hav
eyouev
ert
ri
edsomeey
es
speci
ali
st”
“
What
’st
hatgott
odowi
thy
ou?
”
“
Iwasj
ustaski
ng,
ther
e’snoneedt
obe
r
ude”
“
Gir
lsl
et’
sgo”Wewal
ktoZo’
sof
fi
ce
andshewel
comesus.Af
tershar
ing
hugswesi
tdown.
“
What
’swr
ongMi
ra”
“
I’
mti
red,
diz
zyandnauseous”
“
Mmhcoul
dyoubepr
egnant
”Zosay
s
“
Pregnant
!Nononotpr
egnantpl
ease!
”
shesay
swi
that
rembl
i
ngv
oice.
“
Didy
ouper
hapshadsex
ual
int
ercour
se
Recent
lyormay
bewi
thsomeonei
n
Keny
a?”Iask
“
Real
l
yMama”
“
I’
mjustaski
ngbaby
”
“
Uhm no”she’
sly
ingIcanseet
hat
“
Ther
e’snoneedf
ory
out
oli
e,Iknow
y
ouar
ehav
ingsex
.Kam Kam woul
dn’
t
beher
eify
ouwer
en’
t”shehuf
fs,
Ican’
t
mi
sst
heannoy
ancepl
ast
eredonher
f
acebutshedoesn’
tsayany
thi
ng
“
Okayl
et’
sseewhat
’swr
ongwi
thy
ou
baby
..
.come”Zosay
sasshet
akes
Mi
ra’
shandandl
eadhert
othebed.She
ex
ami
nesheranddoapr
egnantt
est
af
tert
hatwesi
tdown,
shescr
ibbl
es
downsomet
hing.
“
She’
snotpr
egnant
”Isi
ghwi
thr
eli
ef
andIcanseeMi
rar
eleasi
ngabr
eat
hof
r
eli
evet
oo.
“
She’
scomi
ngdownwi
thf
luesoIwi
l
l
gi
vehermedi
cat
iont
hatwi
l
lhel
pher
hopef
ull
yint
hreeday
sshewi
l
lbef
ine.
”
Shesay
sst
il
lscr
ibbl
i
ngdown.
“
Younotgoi
ngt
oinj
ectmymommy
doct
orr
ight
?”Kam Kam say
s
“
NoIwon’
tsweet
hear
t”
“
Umm Mom Zo”Mi
rasay
s
“
Yes”
“
Ihav
en’
tbeent
aki
ngmy
ant
idepr
essant
sforal
mostt
woweeks
nowandIwantt
ost
opt
aki
ngt
hem f
or
good”
“
Butbabyy
ouwer
en’
tsupposedt
ost
op
t
aki
ngt
hem wi
thoutt
alki
ngt
othedoct
or.
St
oppi
ngy
ourmedi
cat
ionwheni
t
seemsl
i
key
oudon’
tneedi
tany
mor
e
canl
eadt
oev
enmor
etr
oubl
i
ngi
ssues.
I
tcancauseant
idepr
essant
s
di
scont
inuat
ionsy
ndr
ome,
flu-l
i
ke
sy
mpt
omsi
soneoft
heant
idepr
essant
s
di
scont
inuat
ionsy
ndr
omesy
mpt
oms.
”
Zosay
s
“
Soy
ouar
esay
ingt
her
easonbehi
nd
hersi
cknesscoul
dbet
hatshest
opped
t
aki
ngherant
idepr
essant
s”Iask
“
It
’spossi
blehowl
onghav
eyoubeen
t
aki
ngt
hem Mi
ra?
”
“
Ayear
”
“
Okayl
et’
sseei
fthemedi
cat
iont
hatI
wi
l
lgi
veherwi
l
lhel
p,i
fnotwewi
l
ltake
i
tfr
om t
her
e.”
“
SomustIcont
inuet
aki
ngt
hem?
”
“
No,
ayeari
senoughbutIwi
l
l
r
ecommendy
ouapsy
chol
ogi
st.
”
“
Thanky
ouMom Zo”Mi
rasay
s.
“
Wear
edone.
..
gett
hesemedi
cat
ionat
t
hephar
macy
..
.ohher
e’st
he
psy
chol
ogi
stcont
actgi
veheracal
land
makeanappoi
ntmentbutIwi
l
ltal
kto
herf
ir
st”Zosay
s
“
Thanky
ousomaNkosi
ungadi
nwaneh”
“
Soz
esi
swami
”Wesayourgoodby
es
andheadout
.Ipr
ayt
hatIdon’
tsee
Khosi
thatwomanhaswayofspoi
l
ing
mymoodar
gh.ThankGodIdon’
tsee
herwest
artatt
hephar
macyf
or
medi
cat
iont
hendr
ivet
ochi
ckenl
i
cken
dr
ivet
hrubef
oregoi
nghome.Sox
’scar
i
spar
kednex
ttot
hegat
e.Iopent
he
gat
ewi
tht
her
emot
e,hegoesi
nfi
rst
andIf
oll
owbehi
ndhi
m andpul
lof
fnex
t
t
ohi
m.
“
Ther
e’sdaddy
!”Scr
eamsKamar
iawhi
l
e
cl
appi
nghert
inyhands.Themomentwe
ar
eoutoft
hecarKam Kam r
unst
oher
daddyscr
eami
ng.Thi
sli
tt
legi
rll
i
kes
scr
eami
ngandt
rustmeherv
oicei
s
r
eal
l
yhur
ti
ngmyear
drums.
“
Daddy
!!
”
“
Hel
l
opr
incess”Hesay
scol
dlyand
doesn’
tscoopherupasusual
.Il
ookat
hi
m,hi
sey
esar
ebl
oodshotr
edandI
’
m
notsur
eifi
t’
smeorhe’
sreal
l
ytr
embl
i
ng
“
Hel
l
oMr
sK,
hiMi
ra”
“
HiMpendul
o”
“
YeboSox
,let
’sgeti
nsi
de”wemakeour
wayi
nsi
deandset
tl
edownont
hecouch.
“
Igott
heDNAr
esul
ts”Hesay
s
“
Ihopey
ouar
ehappynowy
oucansee
t
hatshe’
sreal
l
yyour
s”Mi
rasay
s
“
She’
snotmi
neMi
ra.Iaskedy
oui
fyou
ar
esur
ebuty
ousai
dyes.Whati
sthi
s
nowher
etakeal
ookatt
his!
”Heshov
es
anenv
elopeonMi
ra’
shands.
“
Aret
heywr
it
teni
nBr
ail
l
e?”Hashe
f
orgot
tent
hatMi
racan’
tseemx
m!I
t
aket
heenv
elopeandr
eadt
her
esul
ts.
“
Mom whatdot
heysay
?”
“
It
’ssay
sSoxi
snott
hef
atherMi
ra”
“
Nomama,
itcan’
tbepossi
ble.Iknow
he’
sherf
ather
.Ther
emustbe
somet
hingwr
ongwi
tht
heset
est
”
“
Thedoct
orsai
dtheset
estar
eaccur
ate
Mi
ra,
howy
oucoul
ddot
hist
omehuh?
Howcoul
dyoul
etmebondwi
thher
knowi
ngt
hatshe’
snotmi
ne.
”He
soundshur
t
“
Mpendul
owhywoul
dIl
i
e?Pl
ease
bel
i
eveme,
youhav
etobel
i
eveme!
”
Mi
radef
endher
sel
f
“
Butt
her
esul
tbabydon’
tagr
ee”Isay
“
Haymamakwenz
ekei
phut
ha”
“
Tel
lthedamnf
ucki
ngt
rut
hdammi
t!
!”
Heshout
s
“
Heydon’
tshoutatmydaught
er!
”
“
Yourdaught
erl
i
edt
ome!
..
.shemade
mebel
i
eveKamar
iai
smi
newhi
l
eshe
knowst
hatshe’
snotmi
ne,
she’
scr
uel
!!
”
“
Ify
oudon’
twantourchi
l
diny
ourl
i
fe
y
oushoul
dhav
esosai
dso,
nott
hiscr
ap!
She’
sbeenwel
ltakencar
eofwi
thout
y
ou!Idon’
tunder
standwhyy
out
hinkI
woul
dli
e!It
oldy
ouandIwi
l
lrepeatI
don’
twantt
ohav
eyourchi
l
dbuti
t
happenedandt
her
e’snot
hingIcando,
t
hatdoesn’
tchanget
hel
oveIhav
efor
mydaught
ert
hough!
”
“
Youmadeami
stakecl
ear
lybecause
t
her
esul
tssayshe’
snotmi
ne!
”
“
Ayt
her
e’snomi
stakel
a!Idemand
anot
hert
estwewi
l
ldoi
twi
thmydoct
or
t
hist
ime.Mom Zowi
l
ldoi
t”
“
Real
l
yMi
ray
out
hinkIwi
l
lli
eabout
Kamar
ia’
spet
erni
ty?
”
“
Youhav
ebeendoubt
ingf
rom dayone
t
hatshe’
syour
s,cl
ear
lyy
oudon’
twant
her
!Yazy
oushoul
dhav
esai
dsobef
ore
Iev
eni
ntr
oducedhert
oyou!
”
“
Itol
dyouwhyMi
ra,
Ithoughty
ou
under
stood!
”
“
Bot
hofy
ouhav
etocal
m down.It
hink
Mi
rai
sri
ghtZowi
l
ldoanot
hert
estar
e
y
ouokaywi
tht
hatSox
?”
“
YesMr
sK”
“
Wel
ltomor
rowwear
edoi
ngi
t,Idon’
t
hav
eti
met
owai
t”Mi
rasay
s
“
Wel
li
tsf
inewi
thme.Ihav
etogo”
.Sox
get
supandl
i
ttl
eKam Kam l
ooksathi
m
“
Youar
eleav
ingdaddy
?”hel
ooksat
Kamar
iawi
thsomuchl
ovei
nhi
sey
es.
“
Yesmypr
incess,
Iwi
l
lcomeback
t
omor
rowokay
.”
“
Okay
”
“
Comegi
vedaddyahug”shewi
ggl
es
her
sel
foutofmyar
msandgot
oher
daddywhoscoopsherupandhol
dher
t
ight
lyf
ort
hel
ongestt
ime.Idon’
tli
ke
Soxbuther
eal
l
ylov
eshi
sdaught
erand
Icanseet
hatt
hesenewsofKamar
ia
notbei
nghi
sisbr
eaki
nghi
m apar
t.
“
Ilov
eyoudaddy
”
“
I.
..
Ilov
eyout
oopr
incess”Ibl
i
nkback
myt
ear
s,t
hisi
sreal
l
yhear
t-
breaki
ng
now,
whati
fther
esul
tsar
ereal
l
ytr
ue?
Howar
ewegoi
ngt
otel
lKamar
iat
hat
Soxi
snott
hef
ather
.Theyhav
ebonded
sowel
landImustsayI
’
mimpr
essed.
Heki
ssesherl
i
psandputherdownt
hen
wal
ksout
.
“
Iwi
l
lgol
i
edown”
“
Mir
a….
”
“
Whatmama,
youwantt
oinsul
tmet
hat
I
’
m awhor
ethatsl
eepsar
ound?I
fI
di
dn’
tsl
eepwi
thMpendul
ononeoft
his
woul
dhav
ehappenedbl
abl
abl
a”my
hear
tsi
nkst
omyst
omach
“
Nobaby
,Idon’
twantt
oinsul
tyou.Iwi
l
l
nev
eri
nsul
tyouev
eragai
nI’
m sor
ryf
or
ev
eryi
nsul
tIt
hrewaty
ou”
“
Real
l
y?”Icanseehowsur
pri
sedshei
s
andi
treal
l
ybr
eaki
ngmyhear
t.Ihav
e
beenabadmot
herandIcan’
thel
pbut
hat
emy
sel
ffort
hat
.
“
YesmyMi
racl
eIwantourr
elat
ionshi
p
t
owor
kthi
sti
me.Iwi
l
lcommi
tmy
sel
fin
AAmeet
ingsandt
her
apy
.Iwantt
obe
t
hebestmom y
oudeser
ve.Iwantt
obe
t
hef
ir
stper
sony
ouconf
idei
nwhenev
er
y
ouar
egoi
ngt
hroughsomet
hingnota
mot
herwhowi
l
lthr
owi
nsul
tsaty
ouand
ki
l
lyoursel
f-
est
eem.Iwantt
obet
he
womany
ouar
epr
oudt
ocal
lyour
mot
her
”shesmi
l
eswi
del
yandhert
ear
s
f
lowdownherbeaut
if
ulf
ace.Iwi
pe
t
hem andki
sseshercheek.
“
Mom pl
easet
ell
mey
oubel
i
eveme”
“
Butt
her
esul
tsweet
hear
t.
..
whoel
sedi
d
y
ousl
eepwi
thex
ceptSox
”
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
butIknowi
t’
snothi
m
whof
ather
edmydaught
erwewer
e
al
way
susi
ngpr
otect
ion”
“
May
bey
oumadeami
stake”
“
Mpendul
odoesn’
twantt
hischi
l
d,
may
bei
t’
scausi
ngast
rai
nonhi
s
r
elat
ionshi
pwi
thGugunowhecomes
wi
tht
ri
cks”
“
Idon’
tthi
nksobaby
,Ir
eal
l
ydon’
tli
ke
hi
m butIcanseet
hathel
ovesKamar
ia”
“
Thenl
et’
swai
tfort
omor
row”
“
Yes.Il
ovey
oubaby
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomama”
“
Youdon’
tlov
emegogo”Ichuckl
e
“
Ofcour
seIl
ovey
ousweet
hear
t,come
her
e”Shecomest
ome,
Ipi
ckherup
andpul
lheronmyl
apbef
oreenv
elopi
ng
mygi
rl
sinmyar
ms.

“
Baby
”Icanhearhi
m cal
l
ingmei
nmy
sl
eep.Ibl
i
nkmyey
esopenandt
hey
meethi
sbl
oodshotr
edey
es.Washe
cr
ying?Ihav
enev
erwi
tnessedmy
f
iancécr
ying,
thati
t’
sev
enhar
dtopai
nt
api
ctur
eofhi
m cr
yingi
nmymi
nd.
“
Hey
”Isaygr
oggi
l
y
“
Hol
dmepl
ease”Ial
l
owhi
mtosl
eepon
t
opofmeandhol
dhi
m.
“
What
’sgoi
ngonbabyi
smamaokay
?”
Henodshi
shead,
Ifeel
myt
-shi
rt
get
ti
ngdampandhe’
sshoul
der
sar
e
wi
ggl
i
ng.OhmyDl
ami
nii
scr
ying.
“
Babywhat
’swr
ong,
youar
escar
ingme”
“
Igott
her
esul
ts”
“
Okay
?”
“
She’
snotmi
nebaby
,Idon’
tknowhow
becauseIwassur
eshe’
smi
ne.The
connect
ionIf
eltwi
tht
hatki
d,Ihav
e
nev
erf
elti
twi
thanychi
l
dnotev
enwi
th
mybr
other
’ski
ds.Whyi
sthi
shappeni
ng
t
omeGugu.Il
ovet
hatki
d.Isof
ucki
ng
l
oveher
!”
“
OhbabyI
’
m sosor
ry”Idon’
tev
enknow
howt
oconsol
ehi
m wi
tnessi
nghi
m
cr
yingf
ort
hef
ir
stt
imei
nmyl
i
fei
sjust
apr
oofhowmucht
hisi
sbr
eaki
nghi
s
hear
t.Ican’
thel
pbutf
eel
awf
ulInev
er
meantt
ohur
thi
m.Ij
ustwantal
lofhi
m
t
omy
sel
f.Ev
ersi
nceMi
racameback
ourr
elat
ionshi
phasn’
tbeent
hesame.
SheandKamar
iahast
akenal
lthe
at
tent
ionf
rom me.I
’
m notj
ust
if
ying
whatIdi
dbuti
thadt
obedone.Ican’
t
si
tdownandwat
cht
hemanIl
ove
sl
i
ppi
ngt
hroughmyf
inger
s.Ihav
eal
ot
t
olosenotonl
ythel
oveofmyl
i
febuta
shel
terov
ermyhead,
mycar
eer
,
cl
othi
ngandf
ood.Ihadt
odosomet
hing,
sel
fi
shr
ightIknowbutsomet
imesy
ou
hav
etodowhaty
ouhav
etodot
o
sur
viv
e.Li
fei
shar
dwhat
ever
oppor
tuni
tyy
ougety
ouhav
etogr
abi
t
wi
thbot
hhandst
oget
herwi
thy
ourf
eet
.
Ican’
tguar
ant
eet
hat
’sMi
rawi
l
lnot
sl
eepwi
thmyf
iancé,
yesshesai
dshe
doesn’
twanthi
m butf
ort
hef
actt
hat
t
heyhadsexwhi
l
etheywer
ecal
l
ing
eachot
her“
mal
ume&mt
wana”shows
t
hatany
thi
ngi
spossi
bleespeci
all
ynow
t
hatt
heyhav
eadaught
ert
oget
herwho
wi
l
lbi
ndt
hem t
oget
her
.Imi
ghtaswel
l
cutt
hisbondt
hati
sthr
eat
eni
ngmy
happi
ness.I
twi
l
lhur
tfornowbuthewi
l
l
getusedt
oitandwewi
l
lbehappyagai
n
especi
all
ywhenIf
all
pregnantandf
il
l
Kamar
ia’
svoi
d.
“
Ohbaby
,I’
m sosor
rymay
beIshoul
dn’
t
hav
esai
dyoushoul
ddot
het
estl
ook
nowy
ouar
ehur
ti
ng.Ihat
etoseey
ou
hur
ti
ngl
i
ket
his”
“
Youwer
eri
ghtbabyIdeser
vedt
o
know”
“
Whatdi
dshesayaboutt
his?
”
“
She’
ssosur
ethatKamar
iai
smi
neshe
t
hinkst
her
e’sami
stakesowewi
l
ldo
anot
hert
estbutLwandl
e’
smom i
sthe
onet
hatwi
l
ldoi
t”
“
Soshet
hinksDrMkhwanaz
ili
ed?
”
“
Yes”
“
That
’sabsur
dbaby
”
“
Justt
obesur
e”
“
Isee.
..Il
ovey
ousomuchMpendul
o”
“
Ilov
eyout
oobaby
”Hel
i
ftsuphi
shead
andki
ssesme,
theki
ssdeepensIal
l
ow
hi
mtot
akeal
lhi
sfr
ust
rat
ionsonme
unt
ilwebot
hreachourcl
i
maxand
cuddl
eeachot
her
.Ihearhi
m snor
ing
l
i
ght
lyandcar
eful
l
yrol
loutofbedso
t
hatIdon’
twakehi
m up.Iwearmyr
obe
andsl
i
pper
sandt
akemyphonebef
ore
maki
ngmywaydownst
air
stomakea
cal
l
.
“
Gugu”
“
Mir
awantt
odoanot
hert
estbut
Lwandl
e’
smom wi
l
ldoi
t.Whatar
ewe
goi
ngt
odo?
”
“
Per
fectZoandIwor
kint
hesame
hospi
tal
soi
twi
l
lbeeasy
.Don’
twor
ry
okay
”Isi
ghwi
thr
eli
ef
“
Okay
”
“
IsawNokubongat
odaywi
thMi
raand
t
heki
d.Mi
radi
dn’
ttel
lyouwhyt
hey
wer
eher
e?”
“
NoIhav
en’
ttal
kedt
oher
”
“
GuguI
’
m notget
ti
ngmyhandsdi
rt
yfor
y
ouf
ornot
hing.Wehadadeal
youget
meev
eryi
nfor
mat
ionaboutNokubonga
andKhuz
ani
andIsav
eyourmar
ri
age.I
wantmymanback,
Khuz
ani
bel
ongt
o
menott
othatal
cohol
i
cbi
tch!
”
“
IknowandIwi
l
ldel
i
verIpr
omi
se”
“
Youbet
ter
!”
“
Bye”
“
Bye”Ihangupandsi
ghbef
oreget
st
art
edwi
thcooki
ng.Iknowmyf
iancé
wi
l
lwakeupv
eryhungr
y.

Idon’
tknowwhatki
ndofshi
tMpendul
o
i
spl
ayi
ngatr
eal
l
y.Iknowt
hatKamar
ia
i
shi
sdaught
ernowal
lthi
ssudden
changei
sir
kingt
hehel
loutofhonest
ly.
Heshoul
dhav
esai
diti
fmydaught
eri
s
i
nconv
eni
enci
nghi
m,Iwoul
dn’
thav
e
bot
her
edandi
ntr
oducedhert
ohi
m as
muchasIdon’
twantmydaught
ert
o
gr
owupwi
thoutherf
atherl
i
kemebut
wecan’
tcont
rol
ever
ythi
ngi
nli
fe.The
day
shasbeendr
aggi
ngandIf
eel
li
ke
I
’
m goi
ngt
olosemymi
ndbutt
hankst
o
mama.She’
sreal
l
ysuppor
ti
ngmeI
mustsayI
’
mimpr
essed.Ihav
enodoubt
t
hatourr
elat
ionshi
pissl
owl
ybutsur
ely
bewhati
tusedt
obebef
ore.Wedi
dthe
t
est3day
sbackandLwandl
elwenkosi
wasal
sot
est
edsi
ncehecoul
dbet
he
f
atherofwhi
chIdoubt
.He’
sbeen
say
inghedoesn’
tcar
ewhatt
her
esul
ts
say
s,Kamar
iai
smi
neasmuchashi
s
butIcanseet
hathe’
scr
ossi
ngf
inger
s
t
hatt
heycomebackposi
ti
ve.If
eel
li
ke
t
hiswi
l
lhur
thi
mreal
l
ybecausehe’
snot
t
hef
ather
.Ihav
en’
tgi
venhi
m achance
buthe’
sadamantt
hathewi
l
lwi
nme
back.I
t’
snol
i
ethatIl
ovehi
m butI
’
m
skept
ical
aboutourr
elat
ionshi
pnowand
i
t’
sdoesn’
thel
pthathi
sex
-gi
rl
fr
iendi
s
myaunt
’sdaught
er.Idon’
tknowwewi
l
l
seeast
imegoesonr
ightnowIhav
e
Kamar
ia’
spat
erni
tyt
hati
sst
ressi
ngme
out
.
“
Sot
her
esul
tar
eback”Mom Zohad
dr
ivenher
etoaddr
essusaboutt
he
r
esul
t.Lwandl
elwenkosi
ishol
dingmy
handt
ight
ly,
youseewhatImean.He
want
sKamar
iat
obehi
sbutshe’
snot
.
“
Iwi
l
lgi
vey
ouSoxt
oopeny
our
swi
th
Kamar
iaandLwandl
elwenkosi
youwi
l
l
openy
our
swi
thKamar
ia”
Ihearsome
shuf
fl
ingasLwenkosi
letgoofmyhand.
Ther
e’sunbear
abl
esi
l
encef
ora
momentunt
ilLwandl
elwenkosi
scr
eams
“
Yessshe’
smi
ne!I
’
mthef
ather
!!
”
“
Ihopey
ouar
ehappynow,
yougotwhat
y
ouwant
edMi
ra!
!Tohav
eachi
l
dwi
tha
dr
uggi
e.Vel
eKadeushout
hiy
oudon’
t
wantt
ohav
emychi
l
d!Yourwi
shhas
beengr
ant
ed.Sal
ani
kahl
eI’
mleav
ing”
“
Daddyy
ousai
dwear
egoi
ngt
obuy
cooki
est
oday
”
“
I’
m noty
ourf
athernev
ercal
lmey
our
daddyev
eragai
n!!
!”Kamar
iabur
sti
nto
t
ear
s.Idon’
tknowhowt
ofeel
aboutt
his.
I
’
m conf
usedbymyownemot
ionsat
t
hismoment
.Howcoul
dIhav
emi
ssed
t
his?I
’
mreal
l
yabl
i
ndst
upi
dgi
rl
!

.
..
……………….
..
Twomont
hsl
ater
……………….
.
HappyBi
rt
hdayDhät
-f
öreì
ghnChï
q
Tï
l
ďah

CHAPTER55
“
Ninakuombawewebi
bi”(
I’
m beggi
ng
y
ougr
andma)Her
eshegoeswi
tht
his
l
anguageofher
s.
“
What
every
ousay
ingnoKamar
ia”she
l
ooksatmewi
thpuppyey
esl
ooki
ngso
cut
e,i
t’
sapi
tyt
hist
imet
hosepuppy
ey
esar
enotgoi
ngt
owor
k.I
’
m doi
ng
l
aundr
yandshewantt
o“hel
p”me,
she
l
i
kespl
ayi
ngwi
thwat
ert
hisoneand
she’
srecov
eri
ngf
rom f
lueaswear
e
speaki
ng.
“
Bibi
…”(
Grandma)
“
Bibi
bebebubuwhat
evert
hati
sno
Kamar
iay
ouwi
l
lgetsi
ckwheny
oupl
ay
wi
thwat
er.Gopl
aywi
tht
oys.Yourmom
boughty
oupl
ent
yoft
oys”i
t’
susel
esst
o
buyt
hisonet
oysbecauseshenev
er
usest
hem.Ev
eryweekendwhenMi
ra
comest
ovi
situs,
shebr
ingshernew
t
oys.Myhousei
sful
lofhert
oyst
hatar
e
nev
erused.Speaki
ngofMi
rashest
ays
i
nJohannesbur
gwi
thmysi
ster
.Her
musi
ccar
eeri
sbl
oomi
ng,
you’
dswear
t
hatshehasbeeni
nthi
sindust
ryf
ora
qui
teal
ongt
imenow.I
’
m suchapr
oud
mom,
shewant
edt
oleav
ewi
thKam
Kam butLwandl
elwenkosi
didn’
tagr
ee.
Hehasbeenav
erygoodf
athert
oKam
Kam t
othepoi
ntt
hatshef
orgotabout
Sox
.Wehadt
otel
lhert
hat
Lwandl
elwenkosi
isherr
eal
daddy
.I
wasv
erywor
ri
edaboutt
heconf
usi
on
t
hiswi
l
lcauset
oherbutki
dsf
orget
easi
l
yandI
’
mthankf
ult
oSoxt
okeep
hi
sdi
stancef
rom us,
ithel
ped.
“
ButIdon’
twantt
opl
ay,
Iwantt
ohel
p
y
ounz
ee”
“
Youwi
l
lhel
pmenex
tti
meokay
.”She
nodswi
thherheadandl
ooksatmeasI
cont
inuewi
thmywashi
ng.
“
Aunt
yBonga!
”Il
ookup,
sher
unst
ome
andt
hrowher
sel
finmyar
ms.Il
ookatK
hi
sey
esar
ebl
oodshotr
edandhi
sbear
d
i
snott
ri
mmed.
“
She’
sbeennaggi
ngabouty
ou,
I
t
houghtIshoul
dbr
ingher
”Say
sK
“
Heybaby
,ar
eyouokay
”Ipul
lbackand
squeez
eherchubbycheeks.Emi
hleand
Ihav
ethi
sgoodbond,
she’
sanador
abl
e
chubbygi
rl
.Iwasaf
rai
dthatshe’
snot
goi
ngt
oli
keme.Letmej
ustsayI
’
m
happyt
hatwegetal
ongsowel
lthati
t
i
rksherf
atherwhenweganguponhi
m.
“
Nodaddyi
sgr
umpyandshout
ingal
l
t
het
ime,
Icoul
dn’
tdeal
wit
hhi
sgr
umpy
sel
f”shesay
srol
l
ingherey
esandI
chuckl
e
“
Imi
ssedy
ousomuchsmookumska
Daddy
”
“
Imi
ssedy
out
oobabygi
rl
”Iki
ssher
f
orehead.
“
Emi
hlet
akeKamar
iaandgoi
nsi
det
he
houseandwat
chcar
toonsIwantt
otal
k
t
oAunt
yBonga”
“
Okay
”Shef
reesher
sel
ffr
om myar
ms
andt
akesKam Kam bef
orewal
ki
ng
i
nsi
det
hehouse.Khel
psmehangt
he
cl
othes.
“
Ngi
yakukhumbul
a”(
Imi
ssy
ou)Hesay
s
butIdon’
trepl
y,honest
lyImi
ssedhi
m
t
ooev
erysi
ngl
edayt
hati
t’
shur
t.The
pastt
womont
hshav
ebeenamaz
ing
bet
weenuswel
lunt
ilf
ewday
sbackI
f
oundal
i
nger
ieathi
spl
aceofwhi
chhe
cl
aims,
heknowsnot
hingaboutbutI
don’
tbel
i
evehi
m.
“
Bongawhatdoy
ouwantmet
odo,
for
y
out
obel
i
evemet
hatIdon’
tknow
any
thi
ngaboutt
hatl
i
nger
ie”st
il
lIdon’
t
r
epl
ybecauseIf
eel
li
kehe’
smaki
ngme
af
ool
real
l
y.
“
Bongat
alkt
omepl
ease”
“
Whatdoy
ouwantmet
osayKhuz
ani
huh?
”
“
Tel
lmey
oubel
i
eveme”
“
Idon’
tokay
,sopl
easej
ustl
eav
e”
“
Snookumswhywoul
dIcheatony
ou?
”
“
Doy
’al
lmenaneedar
easont
ocheat
?
NoIdon’
tthi
nkso,
pleasel
eav
emet
he
f
uckal
one!
”
“
I’
m notot
hermen,
don’
tyoudar
e
compar
ewi
thot
hermen!
!”Her
aiseshi
s
handmyhear
tski
psabeatandIcov
er
myf
acewi
thmyar
ms.
“
Snookums”Hesay
ssof
tl
yashe
r
emov
esmyar
msonmyf
ace.
“
Yout
hought
..
.t
hought
”Hebr
eat
hesi
n
cl
osi
nghi
sey
esmoment
ari
l
y
“
Iwi
l
lnev
erl
aymyhandony
ouBonga”
Thepai
ninhi
svoi
cecan’
tbemi
ssed.
Khuz
ani
hav
enev
ershowedmeav
iol
ent
si
deofhi
m,It
hinkt
alki
ngaboutmypast
t
omyt
her
api
sti
staki
ngmebackt
o
t
hoseday
swher
eIwasapunchi
ngbag.
“
Bongal
ookatme”Ishookmyheadno
ast
ear
sfl
owdownmyf
ace.Hepul
l
sme
t
ohi
schestandenv
elopesmei
nhi
s
ar
ms.Icr
ymyey
esbal
l
sout
“
Nomat
terhowangr
yIcanbeorwhat
y
oudot
ome,
Iwi
l
lnev
erl
aymyhandon
y
ou.Icanbeany
thi
ngbutdef
ini
tel
ynot
awomanbeat
erokay
.Ngi
yacel
aukut
hi
ungakucabangi
njenangel
odwai
l
anga
ukut
hingi
yokengi
kubekei
sandl
a
y
ezwa”(
Don’
tyouev
ert
hinkIwi
l
llaymy
handony
ouokay
)Inodmyhead
“
Shhhdon’
tcr
y,y
oubr
eaki
ngmyhear
t.I
wi
shy
oucanbel
i
evemet
hatIdon’
t
knowwhoputt
hatl
i
nger
iei
nmy
bedr
oom butI
’
m wor
kingonf
indi
ng
whoev
erdi
dthat
.It
oldy
out
hatIwant
y
out
obemi
nef
orev
erandIhav
eno
pl
ansofl
ett
ingy
ougo.Whywoul
dI
cheatony
ouwhenIwanty
out
obe
mi
nef
orev
er?Iwon’
tli
etoy
ou,
Ihav
e
beensl
eepi
ngwi
thdi
ff
erentwomenand
i
twasj
ustsexbutwi
thy
oui
t’
sway
di
ff
erent
.It
’snotonl
yaboutsex
,I’
min
l
ovewi
thy
out
othepoi
ntofnor
etur
n.I
wantt
osl
eepandwakeupnex
ttoy
ou
f
ort
her
estofmyl
i
fe.Iwanty
out
obei
n
myar
msf
orev
er.Iwantabeaut
if
ull
i
fe
wi
thy
ouandnooneel
se”Hepul
l
sme
backandwi
pesmyt
ear
swi
thhi
s
t
humbs
“
I’
m sor
ryIwi
l
lpr
ovei
tyout
hatIknow
not
hingaboutt
hatl
i
nger
ie,
pleasedon’
t
bemadatme.Ican’
tst
andi
twheny
ou
ar
emadatme.Kuv
elekut
hiangi
hlany
e”
(
Igocr
azy
)Hesoundssosi
ncer
ebutal
l
oft
hisdoesn’
tmakesense.Howcanhe
notknowany
thi
ngaboutt
hatl
i
nger
ie?I
t
wasi
nhi
sdamnbedr
oom whocoul
d
hav
eputi
tther
e?
“
Iwantt
obel
i
evey
ou,
Ireal
l
ydobut
….”
Heshutmeupwi
thaki
ssIcoul
dn’
t
r
esi
st.Heknowshi
ski
ssesar
emy
weakness.Ourt
onguesar
edanci
ngt
o
unknownt
une,
hepi
cksmeupandI
wr
apmyl
egsar
oundhi
swai
st.Theki
ss
i
sget
ti
ngheat
ed,
mindy
ouwear
e
out
sidet
hehousewhati
ftheki
ds
comesout
.It
’sl
i
keher
eadmymi
nd,
he
wal
ksawayIpeekandnot
icet
hehe’
s
appr
oachi
ngt
hebackr
oom.The
momentwegeti
nsi
det
hebackr
oom
ourcl
othesar
efl
yi
ngi
ntheai
r.GodI
mi
ssedhi
m somuchInev
ergetenough
ofhi
m.Hepushesmet
othebed,
Ifal
l
andbounceabi
t.Isal
i
vat
eatt
hesi
ght
ofhi
srockhar
ddi
ckl
eaki
ngpr
e-cum.
Hi
sgaz
eonmybodyi
sfi
l
ledwi
thso
muchdesi
re,
hewal
kst
owar
dst
hebed
andpul
l
smet
otheedgeoft
hei
tthen
spr
eadmyl
egsapar
t.
“
Damnl
ookatt
hatgl
i
steni
ngpussy
”I
f
eel
hisf
inger
sspr
eadi
ngmyf
oldswi
de
andr
unsl
owl
ybackandf
ort
hal
ongt
he
l
engt
hofmysl
i
t.
“
Youar
esowetbaby
”
“
I’
m wetf
ory
oubaby
,pl
easef
uckme
har
d”Thef
ir
ebur
ningwi
thi
nmy
sel
fis
t
urni
ngi
ntoanoutofcont
rol
inf
erno
“
Youwanti
thar
dhuh”
“
Yesss”Hesl
owl
yent
ersmemypussy
st
ret
chesasi
tswal
l
owshi
sbi
gcock.He
putmyl
egonhi
sshoul
derandhol
dthe
ot
heragai
nsthi
swai
stt
henr
ocksi
nand
outofmypussy
“
Ohhhhmyahhhohy
es!
!”
“
Shi
t!Yourpussyi
ssooof
ucki
nggoood!
Fuck!
”Hi
sthr
ust
sar
ehar
danddeep
t
hatIcanf
eel
himi
nmywomb.Each
andev
eryst
rokei
ssendi
ngwav
esof
pl
easur
e.Hepul
l
southi
sdr
encheddi
ck
andf
li
psmeov
er,
I’
m onal
lfour
s,and
hel
i
ckst
hecr
ackofmybut
tgoi
ngdown
t
omypussyhol
e.Ial
mostcum i
nan
i
nst
ant
.If
eel
hist
onguedel
vi
ngi
ntomy
cuntcausi
ngmet
omoanl
oudl
y.
“
AhhhKy
ess,
it’
ssooogood!
”Hesuck
onmycl
i
tandwor
khi
stonguei
nand
outofmyhol
ewhi
l
ecar
essi
ngmybut
t
andgr
abbi
ngmyhi
ps.Ir
oll
myhi
ps
r
idi
nghi
stongueasIf
eel
itdeeperand
deeper
.Awav
eofpl
easur
ehi
tsmehar
d
andIex
plodei
nhi
smout
h.Her
unshi
s
cockupanddownmywetcuntbef
ore
pl
ungi
ngi
ntome,
ascr
eam escapemy
mout
h.Igr
ibhar
dont
hebedf
or
bal
anceashepounceonmehar
der
.
“
Ohhshi
t!Ungi
phakamnandi
sthandwa
sami
!”Thesoundofourf
leshhi
tt
ing
agai
nstf
leshcol
l
idewi
thourscr
eamsof
pl
easur
e.Icanf
eel
hissweatdr
oppi
ng
onmyback.Hekeepsspanki
ngmybut
t
bet
weenhi
shar
danddeept
hrust
s.
Yangi
dlaI
ndodabo!If
eel
li
ke
conf
essi
ngmyl
ovef
orhi
m al
lov
er
agai
n.
“
Ngi
yakut
handaKhuz
ani
cel
a
ungakungabaz
ilokho”(
Ilov
eyou
Khuz
ani
,nev
erdoubtt
hat
)
“
Idon’
tdoubti
tbabyandIl
ovey
out
oo.I
wi
l
lnev
erhur
tyoudef
ini
tel
ynot
i
ntent
ional
l
ypl
easebel
i
eveme”
“
Ibel
i
evey
ou”i
ttaket
endeepf
astand
har
dthr
ust
sforust
oreachani
ntense
cl
i
max
.
“
Youf
orgi
veme”Wear
enowl
yi
ngon
t
hebedcuddl
i
ng.
“
YesbutIdon’
tunder
standwhocoul
d
hav
eputi
tther
ebaby
,Imeani
t’
sonl
y
meandy
ouwhohav
ethekey
stoy
our
house”
“
Yesi
t’
s.
..
dammi
t!
”
“
What
”
“
Not
hing”
“
Wehav
esecr
etsnow?
”
“
It
’sKhosi
”
“
Oh”
“
Idi
dn’
tsl
eepwi
thherbabyIswear
”
“
Whati
sshedoi
ngwi
thy
ourkey
s
Khuz
ani
”
“
Itookt
hem babybutIt
hinkshehasa
spar
e”Hegoesonandt
ell
meaboutt
he
ni
ghtKhosi
decl
aredherl
ovef
orhi
m.
Okaynowi
tmakesasense.
“
Khuz
ani
pleasesor
touty
ourhoe,
my
daught
erandgr
anddaught
erneedme.I
don’
twantt
ogot
ojai
lforki
l
li
nga
whor
e”
“
Ohsoy
ouwi
l
lki
l
lforme”Icanheara
smi
l
einhi
svoi
ce
“
Wit
houtt
hinki
ngt
wice”
“
Youj
ustknowhowt
omel
taman’
s
hear
tmyj
aan”Hel
i
ftsmyheadupwi
th
mychi
nandki
ssesme.Theki
ss
escal
atesi
ntoanot
herst
eamysessi
on
ofl
ovemaki
ng.Imusthav
efal
l
en
asl
eepaf
terourl
ovemaki
ngbecause
I
’
m wokenupt
heur
get
opee.Lucki
l
y
t
hebackr
oom hav
eabat
hroom soIr
oll
outofbedandski
ptot
hebat
hroom.
OnceI
’
mfi
nishedwi
thmybusi
nessI
washmyhandsandwal
kbackt
othe
bedr
oom.Igetdr
essedandwal
kout
,I
f
orgott
hatIwasdoi
ngl
aundr
ywhenK
ar
ri
vedbuti
tseemsl
i
kehewashedt
he
cl
othest
hatwer
elef
tbecauseIcansee
t
hem hangi
ngont
hel
i
ne.Ismi
l
ehe’
s
suchadar
li
ngi
sn’
the.Iwal
kint
othe
house,
I’
m wel
comedbyr
edr
oseson
t
hef
loorwr
it
ten‘
wil
lyoumar
ryme’
my
hear
tski
psabeatheappear
sandwal
ks
t
owar
dsme.Hekneel
sdownbef
oreme
andf
li
psasmal
lboxofar
ingopen.
“
BabyIl
ovey
ousomuchandIwantt
o
spendt
her
estofmyl
i
fewi
thy
ou.I
t’
s
t
oosoonIknowbutt
omei
tfeel
sli
keI
hav
eknowny
ouf
ory
ear
s.Pl
easemake
met
hehappi
estmani
nthewor
ldand
mar
ryme”I
’
mint
ear
sandshaki
ngmy
headno
“
SayYesAunt
yBonga!
”
“
PleaseGogo!
”Idon’
tknowwhendi
d
t
hist
woappear
ed.Am Ir
eadyt
ore-
mar
ryagai
n?Idon’
tknow,
Ifeel
li
kei
t’
s
t
oosoonbutIl
ovehi
m,l
ordIl
ovehi
m
somuchandIhav
enodoubtt
hatIwant
t
ospendt
her
estofmyl
i
fewi
thhi
m but
I
’
m scar
ed.I
t’
sfeel
sli
keal
loft
hisi
stoo
goodt
obet
rue.DoIsayy
esorno?

Ther
e’snot
hingasf
ulf
il
li
ngasl
i
ving
y
ourdr
eam.I
t’
sbeent
womont
hssi
nceI
j
oinedt
heMZr
ecor
ds.I
’
m wor
kingon
myal
bum butIhav
erel
easedasi
ngl
eof
whi
chi
slov
edbyt
housandsofpeopl
e.
I
t’
sasongaboutmyl
i
feact
ual
l
y,
Londi
siz
wewho’
smypr
oducerandmy
songwr
it
erencour
agedmet
otel
lmyl
i
fe
t
hroughasongsohewr
oteasong
aboutmyl
i
feImustsayi
t’
sev
ery
one’
s
j
am att
hemoment
.It
hinkI
’
m handl
i
ng
l
i
mel
i
ghtmuchbet
tert
hanIt
houghtI
woul
d.
“
What
’swi
thy
out
oday
,uy
abhi
mba!
”
Londi
isr
udeandar
rogant
.Ist
art
edmy
per
iodst
odayandI
’
m cr
ankyashel
l
“
Canwecal
li
taday
,I’
m notf
eel
i
ngwel
l
”
“
Thi
sisnoty
ourf
ather
’sst
udi
oMi
ra,
y
ouwi
l
lnotgetspeci
alt
reat
ment
!”
“
Inev
ersai
dIwantspeci
alt
reat
ment
Londi
siz
weSi
thol
e!”
“
Don’
tshoutatmephel
a!”
“
Youshout
edatmef
ir
st!
”
“
I’
myourboss!
”
“
Bossornot
,youhav
enor
ightt
oshout
atme!
”
“
Yazwenant
ombaz
aneuy
adel
ela!
”
“
Youar
etheonewho’
srude!
”
“
ThedayIf
ucky
ousi
s,y
ouwi
l
lst
op
backchat
ti
ngwhenI
’
mtal
ki
ngt
oyou!
”
“
Youwi
sh!
”It
akeoutmyphonet
ocal
l
mychauf
feur
,per
ksofbei
nganMZ
r
ecor
dsar
ti
st.
“
Guy
s!Guesswhosesonghasbeen
cer
ti
fi
edGol
d!”Scr
eamsLee,
who’
s
act
ual
l
ymymanager
.
“
Leedon’
tjokel
i
ket
hatpl
ease”
Londi
siz
wesay
s
“
I’
m notj
oki
ngbr
a!Mi
rai
sgoi
ng
pl
aces!
”
“
Wow!Di
dyouheart
hatMi
ra!Yoursong
hasr
eachedgol
d!”
“
Ihear
dLee,
I’
m bl
i
ndnotdeaf
,youdon’
t
needt
oscr
eam”Isayt
ryi
ngt
ohi
demy
ex
cit
ement
,wowmysi
ngl
ereachedgol
d
wi
thi
ntwomont
hsofi
tsr
elease.Wol
olo!
“
Ngi
zokuhl
abaMi
ray
ezwa!
”Leebur
st
i
ntol
aught
er
“
Cany
out
woj
ustdat
eal
ready
?”
“
Nev
er!
”Isaydr
amat
ical
l
y
Londi
siz
weof
fer
stot
akeusoutf
or
dr
inksj
ustf
orapr
e-cel
ebr
ati
onaf
ter
f
ewdr
inksmychauf
feurt
akesmeback
t
omyaunt
’spl
ace.Ihav
ebeenst
ayi
ng
wi
tht
hem,
theyar
elov
elypeopl
e.Her
chi
l
drenar
elov
elyandherhusbandt
oo.
I
t’
ssaf
etosaymyst
ayhasbeenni
ce
wi
thmom Duduandherf
ami
l
y.Iwantt
o
t
akeabat
handsl
eepbutl
etmecal
lmy
mom f
ir
stImi
sshersomuchandmy
daught
ert
oo.Herphoner
ings
unanswer
ed.It
ryf
orsev
eral
timesbut
st
il
lgett
hesamer
esul
ts.Ical
lLwenkosi
“
Sthandwasami
”
“
Hel
l
ohowar
eyou”
“
Trustmenowt
hatI
’
m hear
ingy
our
v
oice,
I’
m okay
”Ismi
l
e.Ihav
en’
tgi
ven
hi
m achancebuthe’
snotgi
vi
ngup.The
gi
ft
s,messages,
dat
es,
lat
eni
ghtcal
l
s,I
keepf
all
i
ngf
orhi
m mor
ebutIdon’
t
wantt
oshowhi
m asy
et.He’
snot
wi
nni
ngmebackwi
thoutsweatand
t
ear
s.I
fitwassomeoneel
semay
behe
woul
dhav
egi
venupbynowImeani
t’
s
beent
womont
hsnowsi
ncehehas
beencour
ti
ngme.Het
houghtsi
nce
Kamar
iat
urnedoutt
obehi
sdaught
er,
I
wi
l
ljustl
ethi
minl
i
ket
hat
.HahaIdon’
t
wor
kli
ket
hat
.It
’snoteasyf
oraper
son
t
omi
susesomet
hingt
heyhav
ewor
ked
har
dtogai
n.Ial
sowanthi
mtowor
k
har
dtogetachancei
nmyl
i
fesot
hati
t
won’
tbeeasyf
orhi
mtomi
susei
t.
“
I’
mfi
net
oo.Iwast
ryi
ngt
ocal
lmama
butIcan’
treachherpl
easecal
lme
wheny
ougot
her
eIwantt
otal
ktoour
daught
er”Hegoest
omymom’
shouse
ev
erydayt
otuckKamar
iaandr
eadher
bedt
imest
orywhenshe’
snotspendi
ng
aweekwi
tht
hem.Il
ovet
hewayhe
l
ovesourdaught
er,
itwar
msmyhear
t
andt
hewayKamar
iawar
medupt
ohi
m
andf
orgotaboutMpendul
o.Tal
ki
ng
aboutMpendul
o,hedi
stancedhi
msel
f
f
rom usev
ersi
ncet
hatdayIt
hinki
t’
sa
goodt
hingr
eal
l
ybecauseIdon’
twant
mydaught
ert
ober
emi
ndedoft
he
wor
dshesai
d,ev
eryt
imeshesees
Mpendul
o.Lwenkosi
stoodupt
ohi
srol
e
asaf
athert
oKamar
ia,
it’
ssaf
etosay
mydaught
erl
acksnot
hing.Mom Zoand
Mom ar
espoi
l
ingmydaught
err
ott
en.
“
OkayIwi
l
l,ar
eyouokayt
hough”
“
YesI
’
mfi
ne”
“
Imi
ssy
oumyDol
l
face”
“
Imi
ssy
out
oo”
“
Awushowhenwi
l
lyout
akemeback”
“
Ihav
etogo”
“
Dol
l
facedon’
tdot
hatpl
ease.Iknow
t
haty
oul
ovemeandIhav
elear
ntmy
l
essonpl
easet
akemeback”
“
Itol
dyounj
eyouwi
l
lgety
ouranswer
af
ter3y
ear
s”
“
Kodaudl
alangami
manj
edol
l
face”
“
Stopcompl
aini
ngLwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
ibuhl
ungul
ent
oongi
zwi
say
ona”(
you
ar
ehur
ti
ngme)
“
Isweari
thur
tsbet
tert
hanwhaty
oudi
d
t
ome”
“
I’
m sor
ry”
“
LookIhav
etodash”
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Bye”Ihangupandt
hrowmyphoneon
t
hebedbef
oret
aki
ngof
fmycl
othes.I
needahotshowerImakemywayt
omy
bat
hroom andt
akeal
ongdeser
vedhot
shower
.OnceI
’
m doneIwal
ktot
he
bat
hroom wi
that
owel
wrappedar
ound
mybody
.Icansenseapr
esencei
nthi
s
r
oom.It
houghtIwasal
one.Ii
nhal
e
deepl
yandhi
sscentf
il
lsmynost
ri
ls.
Whati
shedoi
ngi
nmyr
oom,
hehar
dly
ev
erent
ermybedr
oom
“
BabShakahow.
.howcanIhel
pyou”
BabShakai
smom Dudu’
shusband
“
Ihear
dsomenoi
seIcamet
ochecki
f
i
t’
sreal
l
yyou”Ihearhi
sfoot
steps
get
ti
ngcl
oserIf
eel
uncomf
ort
abl
esi
nce
I
’
minat
owel
onl
y.
“
Ohy
eah,
wher
e’smom Dudu”
“
Shewentt
ofet
cht
hegi
rl
sfr
om school
.
I
t’
sjustmeandy
ou”If
eel
hisf
inger
ti
ps
r
unni
ngonmyt
highsandj
umpwi
th
shock
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ng?
”
“
Youar
esobeaut
if
ul”Hesqueez
esmy
br
east
“
Leav
emeal
oneBabShakapl
ease!
”my
hear
tispoundi
ngagai
nstmychest
.I’
m
soscar
edwhati
sthi
smandoi
ngnow?
“
Youdon’
thav
etopl
ayhar
dtoget
,it
’s
j
ustmeandy
ou”
”
Nooo”
“
Yourauntwon’
tknowIpr
omi
se.Ihav
e
not
icedhowy
oubehav
ear
oundmey
ou
wantmeMi
ra,
thoseski
mpydr
esses
andshor
tsy
ouweart
oseduceme”
“
WhatnononoIdon’
twanty
oupl
ease!
Getawayf
rom me!
”I’
mint
ear
sri
ght
now.HepushesmeandIf
all
ont
hebed
hegetont
opofme.Iscr
eam wi
ggl
i
ng
my
sel
f
“
Pleasedon’
thur
tmepl
ease.I
’
m
beggi
ngy
ou!
”Icr
yIf
eel
hisf
inger
s
r
unni
ngonmyv
agi
na
“
Dammi
tyouar
eony
ourper
iods!
!!
”I
f
eel
hiswei
ghtof
fme
“
I’
m apower
ful
manMi
ra,
Icanmake
peopl
edi
sappearwi
thi
nabl
i
nkofaney
e
andIcanf
indy
ouwher
every
ouar
eso
don’
tthi
nky
ouwi
l
lrunawayf
rom me”I
hearhi
sfoot
stepswal
ki
ngawayt
hen
t
hedoorcl
osi
ng.Icur
lmy
sel
fint
oa
f
oet
usposi
ti
onandcr
ymyey
esbal
l
s
out
.

Thehear
tbeatf
il
lst
her
oom Il
ookat
hi
m hehast
hiswi
l
dsmi
l
epl
ast
eredon
hi
sface.I
t’
sapr
icel
essmomentev
er.
Thedoct
orkeepsmov
ingt
hemachi
ne
onmyt
ummy
.
“
Wehav
etwohear
tbeat
s”
“
What
?”
“
Youar
ecar
ryi
ngt
winsMr
sDl
ami
ni”
“
Twi
nswow!
”Ir
eal
l
ydi
dn’
tex
pectt
his
butt
henagai
nhe’
sat
wint
oo,
wit
hhi
s
l
atebr
other
.Iguessi
twasboundt
o
happen.
“
Isev
ery
thi
ngokay
?”myhusbandasks.
YesMpendul
oDl
ami
nii
smyhusband
now.Wemar
ri
edi
ncour
tamont
hback
wear
egoi
ngt
odot
hewhi
teweddi
ngi
n
December
.Idon’
tli
kewi
nterweddi
ngs
sot
hatIwhyIchoset
owai
tabi
t.The
pastt
womont
hshav
ebeenv
erywel
l
.
Myhusbandaccept
edt
hatKamar
iai
s
nothi
sandf
ocusedonmeonl
yandI
l
ovet
heundi
vi
dedat
tent
ionIgetf
rom
hi
m.He’
sbackt
othatSoxIf
ell
inl
ove
wi
th,
Icoul
dn’
tbehappi
er.Mi
raandIar
e
st
il
lfr
iendsev
ent
houghhubbydear
est
pr
efer
redwecutt
ieswi
tht
hem butIhad
t
okeepmyf
ri
endshi
pwi
thhersot
hatI
canbeabl
etof
ishanyi
nfor
mat
ion
aboutLwandl
e’
suncl
eandmom Bonga.
“
Yesev
ery
thi
ngi
sfi
ne.Doy
ouhav
ea
gy
naecol
ogi
st?
”DrMkhwanaz
iasks
“
No,
Idon’
t”
“
Iwi
l
lrecommendy
ouone.
”
“
I’
m sohappy
.Thanky
ousomuchf
or
car
ryi
ngourpr
eci
ousgi
ft
s”Ismi
l
e
t
hroughmyt
ear
s,f
rom t
hatmomentI
knewIhadf
il
ledKamar
ia’
svoi
d.He
wi
pesmyt
ummyandf
ixmet
henhel
ps
mesi
tont
hechai
r.You’
dswearI
’
m
heav
il
ypr
egnantal
ready
.Hi
sphone
r
ings
“
BabycanIt
aket
his”
“
Sur
emyl
ove”Heki
ssesmycheekand
wal
ksoutl
eav
ingmewi
thDrMkhwanaz
i.
“
Youguy
slookshappy
”
“
Wear
ehappy
”
“
Iseeandt
hat
’sgoodt
oknow.Ihav
e
beenwai
ti
ngf
oracal
lfr
om Khuz
ani
but
dol
olo,
Ithoughtt
hatl
i
nger
iewi
l
lbr
eak
t
hingsof
fbet
weent
hem”
“
Theyhav
en’
tbeent
alki
ngf
orday
s
now.
”Isay
“
Ift
hispl
andoesn’
twor
kthenIhav
eto
cutherof
fper
manent
ly”
“
What
?”
“
Youhear
dme”
“
No,
no,
thi
sisex
tremenownoki
l
li
ng
pl
ease,
thi
sisnotwhatweagr
eedon”
“
Wewi
l
lmakei
tlookl
i
keanacci
dent
”
“
NoIdon’
twantmom Bongat
odi
eokay
.
She’
sal
ovel
yper
sonandshe’
sbeen
t
hroughal
otshedeser
vessome
happi
ness”
“
Whi
chsi
dear
eyouonkant
i?”
“
Your
sofcour
sebutIdon’
twantust
o
spi
l
lbl
ood.I
tdoesn’
thav
etogett
her
e.I
t
hinky
oushoul
djustl
etgoofhi
m he
doesn’
twanty
ouhewant
sher
”
“
Ohhnowt
haty
ougotwhaty
ouwant
ed
y
out
alki
ngcr
ap,
heyweGuguy
ousee
t
hissham mar
ri
ageofy
our
s,Ican
dest
royi
tli
ket
his”shesnapsherf
inger
s
“
Iwi
l
ltel
lMpendul
oev
ery
thi
ng”
“
Tel
lmewhat
?”Ohno!
CHAPTER56(
unedi
ted&snack-
nyana)

“
Tel
lmewhat
?”Hel
ooksbot
hofusI
l
ookatDrMkhwanaz
iwi
thpl
eadi
ng
ey
es.
“
Babywhat
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Shet
oldmet
hatshe’
sbeencr
avi
ng
sandandwi
nesoIt
oldheri
t’
snor
mal
to
hav
ewei
rdcr
avi
ngsbutsheneedst
o
st
opi
nter
tai
ningt
hem becauset
hey
coul
dhar
mthebabi
essoIwi
l
ltel
lyou
t
okeepaney
eonher
”
“
OhI
’
m sur
emywi
fewi
l
lnotdo
somet
hingt
ori
skourbabi
esl
i
ves”
“
Ofcour
sebaby
”Ibr
eat
houtofr
eli
ef
andl
ookatDrMkhwanaz
i.
“
I’
m sohappybaby
”Wear
enowdr
ivi
ng
t
ohi
smom’
shouse,
hishandi
s
br
ushi
ngmyt
ummywhi
l
etheot
heri
s
dr
ivi
ng.Ican’
tst
opt
hinki
ngaboutwhat
DrMkhwanaz
isai
dshe’
sbei
ngex
treme
now.Ki
l
li
ngi
stoomuchIwon’
tbeabl
e
t
oli
vewi
tht
haty
oooh.Whatshoul
dIdo?
Shoul
dIwar
nmom Bonga?
“
Baby
”
“
Huh”
“
Wher
e’sy
ourmi
nd”
“
Her
ebabywi
thy
ou”
“
Somet
hingi
sbot
her
ingy
ou”
“
I’
mjustov
erwhel
medbabyt
hat
’sal
l
.Im
car
ryi
ngt
wins”Isaywi
thaf
akesmi
l
e
“
Iwi
l
lbewi
thy
oual
lthest
epoft
heway
”
“
Thanky
oubaby
”Ismi
l
efai
ntl
y.We
ar
ri
veathi
smom’
shouse.
“
Makot
i”
“
Mama”wehug
“
Myboyhowar
eyou”
I
’
m ov
ert
hemoonmamz
o”Heki
sses
hi
smom cheeks.
“
Ihav
en’
tseeny
out
hishappyev
ersi
nce
y
ouf
oundoutKamar
iai
snoty
our
daught
eraykodwaangi
thembi
maan
kahl
e”(
butI
’
m notsur
e)
“
Test
snev
erl
i
emama”Mpendul
osay
s
“
Mmmhaysot
hini
ket
hina”(
whatwoul
d
wesay
)
“
Wel
ll
et’
sfor
getaboutki
dst
hatar
enot
mi
nebecausenowI
’
m goi
ngt
ohav
e
mi
net
hatI
’
m cer
tai
nar
emi
ne”He’
sso
happyandhecan’
tev
enhi
dei
t
“
Makot
iuz
ethwel
e”(
mydaught
eri
nlaw
i
spr
egnant
?)
“
Ehhmamawi
tht
wins”
“
Yil
i
li
li
l
i”Sheul
ulat
es.
“
Thanky
ousi
s”shehugsmeagai
n.I
smi
l
emyr
elat
ionshi
pwi
thhi
smom i
s
okayi
tjustt
hatshe’
stheki
ndofper
son
whot
ell
itl
i
kei
tis.
“
Wuuuhubuv
il
abuz
obangangomkhul
u
kesewz
othwel
enj
e”Igi
ggl
e
“
I’
m notl
azymom”
“
Wuuuuakushowena.Ical
l
edy
ouguy
s
her
ebecausewehav
evi
sit
ors”
“
Whatv
isi
tor
s”asksmyhusband
“
Woz
ani
”(come)shel
eadsust
othe
l
i
vingr
oom.Thear
e3gent
lemensi
tt
ing
andhav
ingt
eaandscones.
“
Mom whatar
ethesemendoi
ngher
e?”
“
AwMpendul
omt
anami
ist
hisy
ourway
ofgr
eet
ingy
ouruncl
es.Ihav
ecal
l
ed
t
hem t
odi
scussaboutt
hel
obol
a”Sox
huf
fsIcanseet
hathedoesn’
twantt
o
di
sappoi
nthi
smom sowesi
tdown.My
ey
est
rav
elt
otheonet
hathav
ebeen
busyonhi
sphoneohnononot
hiscan’
t
be!Ourey
esmeetIcanseeshocki
nhi
s
ey
esbutt
rustmehe’
snotshockedasI
am.Myoneni
ghtst
andi
smyhusband’
s
uncl
ewhatf
ucki
sthi
s!

I
’
m st
il
lsur
pri
sedt
hatSpi
derandKhany
i
hav
en’
ttr
iedany
thi
ngandhe’
snot
pl
anni
ngt
odoany
thi
ngbutIdon’
twant
t
obel
i
evei
twhati
fhewant
smet
olose
f
ocusf
ir
stt
henheat
tacksmyf
ami
l
y.I
don’
tknowwhatIwoul
ddoshoul
dthe
unt
hinkabl
ehappenedt
omyf
ami
l
y
may
beIshoul
dmeethi
m andwet
alk
aboutt
his.Ihat
esl
eepi
ngwi
thoneey
e
open.I
t’
sjustdi
ff
icul
tnowt
hatMi
rai
sin
Johannesbur
gany
thi
ngcoul
dhappent
o
her
.Howwi
l
lIpr
otectherwhenI
’
m her
e
i
t’
sast
ressi
ngsi
tuat
ion.

Thepastt
womont
hshav
ebeen
amaz
ingbet
weenmeandmysnookums
unt
ilf
ewday
sbackshef
oundal
i
nger
ie
i
nmyhouseofwhi
chIhav
eno
knowl
edgeof
.It
hinkKhocyputi
tther
e
onpur
poseIdon’
tknowwhenwi
l
lthat
womangeti
tonhert
hickskul
lthatI
’
m
noti
nter
est
edi
nher
.Ihav
etosor
ther
outsoonshe’
sbecomi
ngat
hor
ninmy
r
elat
ionshi
pwi
thBongaandt
hat
’sal
ast
t
hingIwant
.Il
oveherIr
eal
l
ydoandI
wantt
ospendt
her
estofmyl
i
fewi
th
hersoher
eam Ibef
oreheraski
ngher
handi
nmar
ri
ageI
’
m pr
ayi
ngshesay
s
y
es.Il
ookatherasshe’
scr
yingshaki
ng
herhead

“
Pleasesayy
esAunt
yBonga!
”Shout
s
mydaught
er.Theyhav
egr
ownsocl
ose
andIl
ovei
t.
“
I’
mtoobr
okenf
ory
ouK.Ihav
eso
muchbaggage,
I’
mfuckedup
emot
ional
l
y,Ihav
efl
awsand
i
mper
fect
ions,
I’
mtoodamagey
ouar
e
t
oogoodf
ormeKy
oudeser
vesome….
”
“
Youar
eper
fectf
ormewi
thy
ourf
laws
andi
mper
fect
ions,
Iaccepty
our
aw,
uncut
,vul
ner
abl
e,beaut
if
ul,
dramat
ic,
beaut
if
ul,
int
ell
i
gent
,amaz
ing,
sex
y.I
accepty
out
hewayy
ouar
ebabyandI
wi
l
ldr
enchy
oui
nev
erl
ast
ingl
ove”
“
OhK.
..
Yes”
“
Huh?
“
YesIwi
l
lmar
ryy
ou”Shegi
vesmeher
handandIt
akeof
fherweddi
ngband
andsl
i
det
heengagementr
ingt
hatIgot
f
orher
.Idi
dn’
tpl
ant
hispr
oposal
butI
wi
l
lmakei
tupt
oheronourweddi
ng
day
.Igetupandwi
pehert
ear
sbef
ore
ki
ssi
ngher
.
“
Ewwwww!
”Shout
sthemunchi
es
causi
ngust
ogi
ggl
e.
-

I
t’
sbeent
womont
hssi
nceSkhui
s
t
aki
ngv
erygoodcar
eofus.He’
s
spoi
l
ingusr
ott
enev
ennowhehasn’
t
t
oldmewhat
’si
nforhi
m.I
’
m scar
ed
shoul
donedayhef
oundoutt
het
rut
hhe
wi
l
lki
l
lus.
“
Whydoy
oucar
eSkhuImeanwhatdo
y
ouex
pecti
nret
urnf
rom me?
”
“
Not
hingKhany
iI’
m doi
ngwhatVusi
woul
dhav
edonet
ooi
ftabl
eswer
e
t
urned”Hegul
psdownhi
swhi
skey
“
Youl
ovedhi
m”
“
Hewasmyonl
yfami
l
yit
’sbr
ingsmeso
muchpai
nthatbi
tchki
l
ledhi
mli
kean
ani
mal
!”
“
Shewaspr
otect
ingher
sel
f”
“
Thatbul
l
shi
tsheki
l
ledhi
mforhi
s
weal
th”
“
Khumal
owasabusi
veSkhumbuz
o…”
“
Unamangamaan!HowcanI,
his
br
othernotknowaboutt
hat
!”
“
Itwasnoteasybecausei
twasasi
deof
hi
m hewasnotpr
oudof
.”
”
NonoIr
efuset
obel
i
evet
hat
.Vusi
was
agr
eatmanKhany
i.Hemademet
he
manIam t
oday
.Thosebast
arddeser
ve
t
opay
.It
houghtkeepi
ngMi
rawayf
rom
herwoul
dbeenoughbutI
’
m not
sat
isf
ied.Theyar
ecar
ryi
ngonwi
thl
i
fe
l
i
kenot
hinghappened”
“
Hewasagoodmany
esbuthehashi
s
f
lawsl
i
keev
ery
one.He’
snotI
nnocenti
n
t
hisandher
eal
l
ylov
edhi
swi
feand
daught
erIdon’
tthi
nkhewoul
dwanty
ou
t
ohur
tthem”
“
Dontsayt
haty
oudon’
tknowwhathe
woul
dhav
ewant
ed!
”
“
It
’st
rueSpi
derl
eti
tgopl
ease”I
squeez
ehi
shand
“
I’
mti
redofv
engeanceandev
ery
thi
ngI
j
ustwantpeacenowandf
orgetabout
mypast
”
“
Youar
eaccept
ingdef
eatnotme.
”
“
Wheny
ouar
edoneki
l
li
ngt
hem wi
l
lthat
makey
ousl
eepatni
ght
”Hel
aughs
“
Khany
isi
l
eIhav
eki
l
ledt
housandsof
peopl
eandIst
il
lhav
emypeacef
ul
sl
eep”
“
Cel
awenz
elemi
nake,
let
’sj
ustf
orgot
aboutt
his”Il
ookathi
m deepi
ntheey
es
“
WhyKhany
i?Sheki
l
ledy
ourmom,
she
ki
l
ledmybr
otherwhyar
eyoul
ett
ing
t
hem gol
i
ket
hat
.What
everKhuz
ani
hav
eony
ouIwi
l
lpr
otecty
ou”
“
Theyar
enotwor
thi
t”I
’
m scar
edt
he
mor
ehedi
gsaboutt
hist
het
rut
hwi
l
l
comeoutt
heni
twi
l
lbeov
erf
orme.
“
Pleaset
hinkabouti
t”Ipl
antapeckon
hi
scheekandgetupbuthepul
l
smet
o
herl
apandki
ssesme.Theki
ssi
s
deepeni
ngI
’
m get
ti
ngweti
nani
nst
ant
i
t’
sbeen4y
ear
saf
teral
l
.

TheQwabe’
sar
egat
her
edar
oundt
he
t
abl
eeat
ingbutMi
rai
snott
her
ewi
th
t
hem whi
chi
ssur
pri
singbecauseshe
hasnev
erski
pdi
nner
.
“
Mir
aisst
il
lsl
eepi
ng?
”AsksDudu,
Shakacl
ear
shi
sthr
oatandcont
inue
wi
thhi
sfood
“
Iwi
l
lgocheckonhermama”Say
s
Nombuso,
they
oungestdaught
erofMr
andMr
sQwabe.
“
Pleasedobabyandt
ell
herImadeher
f
avor
it
e”
“
OkayMama”Nombusomakesherway
upt
hest
air
case,
sheknocksonMi
ra’
s
doorbutshedoesn’
trepl
y.
“
Mir
aopenup”
“
Comei
n”Shesay
swi
thahoar
sev
oice
f
rom al
lthecr
ying.Nombusonot
icet
hat
Mi
rai
scr
yingandsi
tnex
ttoher
“
Heywhat
’swr
ong”
“
Not
hing”
“
Whyar
eyoucr
ying?
”
“
Ijustmi
ssmydaught
ert
hat
’sal
l
”she
f
akesasmi
l
e
“
NcooooI
’
m sor
ry”
“
It
’sf
ine”
“
Dinneri
sready
”
“
I’
m nothungr
y”
“
Mom madey
ourf
avor
it
e”
“
Tel
lherIwi
l
leatt
omor
rowIj
ustwant
t
osl
eep”
“
Arey
ousur
eyouar
eokayMi
ra?
”
“
YesI
’
mfi
negoandeatbef
orey
our
f
oodget
scol
d”
“
Ihav
emagi
chugl
et’
smehugy
ou,
you
wi
l
lfeel
bet
ter
”Theyshar
eahugand
Mi
rasmi
l
esf
aint
ly
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Youar
ewel
comesi
s”Nombusosay
s
assheget
supf
rom t
hebed
“
Iwi
l
lcomecheckony
oubef
orey
ou
sl
eep”Mi
ranodsandNombusowal
ks
downandex
plai
ntoherpar
ent
swhy
Mi
racan’
tmakei
ttot
het
abl
e.
“
Shamel
etmedi
shupf
orherandt
ake
herf
oodt
oher
”
“
SinceI
’
mfi
nishedIwi
l
ltakei
ttoher
dar
li
ng”Dudusmi
l
essher
eal
l
y
appr
eci
atehowherhusbandwel
comed
Mi
ral
i
kehi
sownandt
reat
sherl
i
keone
ofherdaught
er’
s.OnceDudui
sfi
nished
di
shi
ngupShakat
akesMi
ra’
sfoodand
makehi
swayup.Hedoesn’
tknockbut
geti
nsi
det
hebedr
oom.Themoment
Mi
raf
eel
shi
spr
esenceshej
umpsup
wi
thf
ear
“
Ibr
oughty
ouf
oody
ouneedt
oeat
”He
pl
acest
hef
oodont
hepedest
alandsi
ts
downont
hebed.
“
I’
m nothungr
y”Mi
rasay
swi
tha
shi
ver
ingv
oice.
“
Whendoesy
ourper
iodsend?
”
“
Sot
haty
oucanhav
eyourwi
thme
huh?
”It
’sshockshi
m howbr
aveshei
s
t
osayt
hat
.Het
akesherphoneand
l
ooksatt
hehomescr
eenwal
l
paper
“
Youhav
eabeaut
if
uldaught
eri
t’
sapi
ty
l
i
fei
scr
uel
shemi
ghtdi
sappearl
i
key
ou
butt
hedi
ff
erencei
sthatshewi
l
lnev
er
bef
oundl
i
key
ou”Mi
ra’
shear
tbeat
f
ast
ershecoul
dn’
tst
omacht
het
hought
ofany
thi
nghappeni
ngt
oherdaught
er.
“
Pleasedon’
thur
tmydaught
erI
’
m
beggi
ngy
ou.Iwi
l
ldoany
thi
ngy
ouwant
asl
ongasy
oudon’
thur
therpl
ease”she
cr
ies
“
Hahahat
hat
’smygi
rl
.Eaty
ourf
oodi
t’
s
get
ti
ngcol
d”Heget
supandwal
ksout
l
eav
ingMi
racr
yinghy
ster
ical
l
y.He
checkst
hecoastf
ir
stbef
oreent
eri
ng
hi
sst
udyr
oom andmakesacal
l
.
“
Phakat
hway
o”
“
Inki
ngaz
ethusez
ixaz
uleki
l
e”(
our
pr
obl
emshav
ebeensol
ved)Hesay
s
wi
thasmi
l
eonhi
sface.
“
Ushokanj
ani
”(whatdoy
oumean)
“
Sengi
wut
hol
i
leumhl
abel
o”(
Ifoundour
sacr
if
ice)
“
Mmm ar
eyousur
eaboutt
hist
her
e’sno
goi
ngbackoncet
her
it
ual
hav
ebeen
per
for
med”
“
Awndodaushoukut
hiemv
a
kwesi
khat
hiesi
ngakasi
bhukudaemal
i
ni
sengi
nganqi
kanqi
kamanj
e”(
Awman
y
out
hinkaf
terwehav
ebeenswi
mmi
ng
i
nthepool
ofmoneyIcanhav
edoubt
s
now)
“
Ushoukut
hiuz
imi
sel
eukuni
kel
a
ngomuny
ewez
int
andokaz
izakho?
”(You
ar
ear
ereadyt
osacr
if
icewi
thoneof
y
ourl
oveones)
“
She’
snotmyl
oveonesbutshe’
smy
wi
fe’
sni
eceIt
hinki
t’
scoul
dwor
k”
“
Kuf
unekai
gaz
ilakhondodai
t’
syour
wi
feory
ourki
ds”(
it
syourbl
oodt
hati
s
neededman)
“
Butmywi
fe’
sbl
oodi
sal
somi
ne.Thi
s
onei
sspeci
alQhud’
el
imt
hent
e.”
“
Whatmakesherspeci
ali
fshe’
snot
y
ourbl
ood”
“
She’
sbl
i
ndI
tsabi
gsacr
if
iceman.
”
“
Mmmm IseebutIdoubti
twi
l
lwor
k”
“
Ithav
etowor
kmani
thav
eto!Ican’
t
l
oseal
lmyr
ichesandIwi
l
ldef
ini
tel
ynot
l
ostmywi
feandki
ds”
“
Iguessi
t’
swor
that
rywhenwi
l
lyou
br
ingher
”
“
Iwantt
ohav
efunwi
thherf
ir
st,
ugcwel
emaanngaphangez
ansi
Icant
l
etal
lthesecur
vesgoi
ntowast
e”
Qhudel
i
mthent
elaughs
“
Justmakei
tqui
ckl
yti
mei
snotonour
si
de”Theysaygoodby
eandhehangup.
Hebr
eat
hesoutl
oudl
yhopi
ngt
hat
ev
ery
thi
ngwor
ksout
.Hecan’
taf
for
dto
l
osehi
sri
chesofwhi
chhegott
hrougha
cer
tai
nri
tual
thatwasper
for
medcal
l
ed
‘
ukut
hwal
a’
.Oncei
nawhi
l
ehehadt
o
ki
l
lav
irgi
ntokeephi
sri
chesgr
owi
ng
butt
hist
imear
oundt
abl
ehav
etur
ned
hehav
etosacr
if
icewi
thoneofhi
s
bl
oodbuthecan’
tlosehi
swi
feoroneof
hi
ski
ds.Hel
oveshi
sfami
l
ydear
ly,t
hey
ar
ehi
ssour
ceofhappi
ness,
theyar
ehi
s
wor
ld.Hebel
i
evet
hatsi
nceMi
rai
shi
s
wi
fe’
sbl
oodi
t’
scanwor
kandhehas
t
hisbel
i
eft
hatdi
sabl
edpeopl
ear
esome
sor
t“speci
al”peopl
e.
CHAPTER57
Iwi
sht
hegr
oundcanswal
l
owmeupat
t
hismoment
.Ist
hissomeki
ndofa
pr
ankorwhat
?Hel
ooksatmeasi
fhe’
s
t
ryi
ngt
omakesur
ethati
t’
sreal
l
ymeor
hecoul
dbemi
staki
ngme
“
wuy
eloumakot
i?”(
Ist
hist
hedaught
er
i
nlaw?
)Heasksl
ooki
ngatme
“
Yesmal
ume”myhusband’
srepl
yand
t
heuncl
elaughs
“
Ngat
hikusaz
omel
euy
oci
ngakahl
e
ndodanaakusi
yel
o”(
Ithi
nky
ouhav
e
l
ookt
hor
oughl
ythi
sisnott
heoneson)
l
ordwhati
shedoi
ngnow.
“
Whatdoy
oumean?
”
“
Imean….
”Icuthi
m of
fwi
thascr
eam
“
Babywhat
’sgoi
ngon”
“
Idon’
tknowbabyIt
hink.
..
ahhht
her
e’s
pai
ninmy
..
.ahhh”
“
Kuphi
makot
i”
“
Inmyabdomenahhh”
“
Youwantmet
otakey
out
othe
hospi
tal
”
“
Not
akemehomepl
ease,
Ijustwantt
o
r
est
”
“
Bomal
umeI
’
m sor
ry,
Ihav
etot
akemy
wi
fehomeasy
oucanseeshe’
snot
f
eel
i
ngwel
l
.Canwemeett
omor
row”
Theyagr
eeandoneni
ghtst
andi
s
l
ooki
ngatmebutIl
ookaway
.Ij
ust
coul
dn’
twat
cht
hatmanspi
l
lthebeans.
Hescoopsmeupandwal
kswi
thmet
o
ourapar
tmentwhenwear
ri
veathome
t
henpl
acesmeonourbed.
“
Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ngnow”Hel
ooksat
mewor
ri
edshamei
fonl
yheknewbutI
hadt
ofakesi
ckness.
“
I’
m abi
tbet
ter
,Ij
ustwantt
oli
eabi
t”
“
Don’
tyouwantsomet
hingt
oeat
?”
“
Yespl
ease”Hesmi
l
esandki
ssesme
“
Ngi
yabuy
a”Hewal
ksout
,It
akemy
phoneandcal
lDrMkhwanaz
i
“
Gugu”
“
I’
mindeepshi
t!
”It
ell
herwhat
happened
“
Ehsi
smi
naangi
hlangenenobuf
ebe
bakho,
youwi
l
lseeuz
ophumakanj
ani
”
“
ComeonDrMkhwananz
i…”
“
WeGuguKhuz
ani
washer
eandhe
t
hreat
enedme,
Ihav
enot
imef
or
ubuf
ebebakho!
”
“
Het
hreat
enedy
ou?
”
“
Yeswhodoeshet
hinkhei
shuh?I
fhe
t
hinkshecanf
uckmeanddi
tchmej
ust
l
i
ket
hat
,hegotanot
hercomi
ng!
”
“
Buty
ousai
dyout
woagr
eedonno
st
ri
ngsat
tachednj
e”
“
Fuckof
fmaan!I
’
m goi
ngt
oshowhi
m
whoIam.I
fIcan’
thav
ehi
mthenwewi
l
l
bot
hlosehi
m!YesIhav
eani
dea!
”Oh
God,
it’
scl
eart
hiswomanwon’
thel
pme,
Ihav
etof
indapl
anbef
oret
heendof
t
odayot
her
wisei
t’
sov
erf
orme.

Nev
eri
nmi
l
li
ony
ear
swoul
dIhav
e
t
houghtIwoul
dchangemysur
name
f
rom Khumal
otoMsi
mango.Themor
eI
t
hinkaboutt
his,
themor
eIdon’
tregr
et
mydeci
sionofagr
eei
ngt
oK’
smar
ri
age
pr
oposal
.He’
sev
ery
thi
ngIwanti
na
manandmor
e.Ibel
i
evewewi
l
lhav
ea
goodl
i
fet
oget
her
,her
eal
l
ymakeme
happy
.Idon’
tthi
nkIwoul
dhav
efounda
manl
i
kehi
m especi
all
yinmyage.Good
menar
eal
way
staken,
I’
m sol
uckyI
f
oundmyKi
ng.Ther
e’ssomuchIl
ove
aboutKbutmostofal
lIl
ovet
hewayhe
t
reat
smel
i
keaQueen.

Wear
egoi
ngoutf
ordi
nnerandhewent
t
odr
opEmi
hleandKam Kam athi
s
mom’
shousewhi
l
eImakemy
sel
f
beaut
if
ulf
orhi
m.I
’
minaspaghet
tist
rap
cutoutbl
uedr
essandbl
ackheel
s.I
compl
etet
hel
ookwi
thsl
i
ver
accessor
ies.Myweav
eiscascadi
ngon
myshoul
der
sandt
hemake-
upi
son
poi
nt.Hear
ri
vesandIhav
emyey
eon
hi
m,hel
ooksgor
geousr
ightnowi
na
bl
ueshi
rtandbl
acksui
teohwel
lIguess
wear
ecol
ourmat
chi
ngt
oday
.

“
Youl
ookbr
eat
h-t
aki
ngmywi
fe”Ibl
ush
“
Youar
enotbady
our
sel
fhubby
dear
est
”
“
Shal
lwe”
“
Yes”Il
i
nkmyar
m wi
thhi
sandwe
makeourwayout
.Heopenst
hedoor
f
ormeandIgeti
nthenhej
ogst
ohi
s
si
de.Thedr
ivei
sfi
l
ledwi
thchi
tchat
.
“
Bonga”
“
Mmh”
“
Uthi
mmhkubani
”Il
ookathi
m and
gi
ggl
e
“
Hubbydear
est
”
“
Thanky
ousomuchf
oragr
eei
ngt
obe
mywi
fe”Ismi
l
e
“
Ijustl
ovey
ouman”
“
Ilov
eyoumor
e”Wear
ri
veatt
he
r
est
aur
antandhehadbookt
hewhol
e
r
est
aur
ant
.Thesetupj
ustamaz
ingand
t
her
e’sapi
anoguywho’
spl
ayi
ngsof
t
keyaswedi
ne.Thi
sisl
ovel
yI’
mfal
l
ing
f
orhi
m al
lov
eragai
n.
“
Youar
etoogoodf
ormeK,
doy
ou
knowt
hat
”
“
Iai
mtopl
easeMr
sMsi
mango”
“
MmhIl
ovet
hesoundoft
hat
”
“
Let
’st
oast
”It
akemynon-
alcohol
i
c
champagneashedoessot
oo.
“
Tot
henex
tst
epofourl
i
vesandal
otof
f
ucki
ng”Ichuckl
e
“
Tot
henex
tst
epofourl
i
vesandl
otof
f
ucki
ng”Wecl
i
ckourgl
assesandsi
pon
ourchampagne.Theconv
ersat
ioni
s
f
lowi
ngwear
eget
ti
ngt
oknoweach
ot
hermor
eandmor
eev
ery
day
.Il
ove
t
hewayhel
ooksatme,
li
keI
’
mtheonl
y
t
hingt
hatmat
ter
sint
hewor
ldt
ohi
m.
“
Dancewi
thme”It
akehi
shandandwe
dance,
eyesl
ocki
ng.
“
Ican’
twai
tri
pthi
sdr
essof
fyou”Igasp
causi
nghi
mtochuckl
e
“
Let
’sgetoutofher
e”Iwhi
speri
nhi
s
earandbi
tei
t.
“
Yourwi
shi
smycommandmyQueen”
Hescoopsmeupbr
idal
andIj
ustknew
t
hatngi
zodl
i
waf
uthi
hhay
ikancaneand
I
’
m sor
eady
!

Icanhearmyphoner
ingi
ngi
nmydeep
sl
eepandIi
gnor
eitbuti
t’
sper
sist
ent
.I
gr
oanandf
iddl
efori
tonmybedsi
de
t
abl
ethenansweri
twi
thoutchecki
ng
who’
scal
l
ingme.
“
Yes”Isaygr
oggi
l
y
“
Godwhyar
ey’
al
lunr
eachabl
e!Ihav
e
beent
ryi
ngt
ocal
lmom,
uncl
eK,
Mom
Zo!
”
“
I’
m sor
rybaby
,IknowIwassupposed
t
ocal
lyouandl
ety
out
alkt
oKamar
ia
buty
ourmom t
oldmet
hatshei
sat
uncl
e’
smom housewi
thEmi
hley
ou
knowIdon’
tli
ket
hatol
dwomanf
or
mi
str
eat
ingmymom”ThedayIf
ound
outKamar
iai
smydaught
erIwasso
happy
,myl
ovef
ort
hel
i
ttl
eangel
grew.
She’
ssoador
abl
eandshehasme
wr
appedar
oundherl
i
ttl
efi
nger
.Ihear
Dol
l
facesni
ff
ingont
heot
hersi
deoft
he
l
i
ne.
“
Babyar
eyoucr
ying”
“
Hewant
stohur
tsmeLwenkosi
”Isi
tup
onmybut
t
“
Who?
”
“
BabShaka.
.He.
..
He.
.t
ouc­
hed
me.
..
and.
.andI
’
m scar
edIwantt
oget
..
outofher
e..
pleasebuthet
hreat
ened.
.
t
otake.
.our
..
daught
er”shesay
s
bet
weensobsandmyhear
tst
op
beat
ing
“
Whatdoy
oumeanhet
ouchedy
ou!
”
“
Hewant
stosl
eepwi
thme,
ifIwasn’
t
onmyper
iodshewoul
dhav
esl
eptwi
th
meLwenkosi
.I’
m soscar
edpl
easehel
p
me”mot
herf
ucker
!Icanf
eel
my
t
emper
atur
eri
sing.
“
LookI
’
m onmywayr
ightnow,
Ineed
y
out
ocal
lthepol
i
ce”It
urnt
hel
i
ghton
andst
artget
ti
ngdr
essed
“
Whatpol
i
ce,
rememberhe’
sapower
ful
manI
’
m sur
epol
i
cear
ewor
kingf
or
hi
m!”
“
Okayl
ockt
hedoorunt
ilIcomet
her
eto
gety
ou”
“
Ihav
elockedi
tal
ready
”
“
Don’
topeni
tunt
ilIar
ri
veDol
l
faceokay
”
“
Pleasehur
ryup,
I’
m scar
ed”
“
I’
m onmywaybabyj
usthangi
nther
e
okay
”
“
Okay
”Ihangupandcal
luncl
ebuthi
s
phonei
sof
f.It
rymom Bongai
t’
sthe
samest
ory
.Itwi
l
lbeusel
esst
ocal
lmy
par
ent
sbecauset
heyar
enotr
eachabl
e.
Ther
e’sacer
emonyatgogo’
sand
net
wor
kiswhacki
nthatar
eashel
i
ves
i
n.If
ini
shget
ti
ngdr
essedandwashmy
f
acet
hent
akemycarkey
sandwal
l
et.
OhSnap,
whatwi
l
lIdowi
thSnot
hando.
Thi
nkf
astLwandl
e!Ohy
es.Ij
ogt
oher
bedr
oom andwakeherup
“
Munchki
nwakeup”
“
Mmh”
“
Weneedt
ogo,
wakeuppl
ease!
”She
r
ubsherey
esandl
ooksatme
“
Gowher
e?”
“
Dol
l
facei
sindanger
”shewi
denherr
ed
ey
es
“
Issheokay
?Hav
eyoucal
l
edmom and
dad?
”
“
Nopl
easegetup”sher
oll
outofbed
andIgi
vehergownandsl
eeper
s.
“
Wher
ear
ewegoi
ngpho?
”
“
Tomal
ume’
spl
ace.
”Shenodswehead
t
othegar
ageandgeti
ntomycart
hen
dr
iveoutaf
teropeni
ngt
hegat
e.I
t’
stake
l
essmi
nut
est
henusual
toar
ri
veatmy
uncl
e’
shousebuti
ttur
nsoutt
hathe’
s
nott
her
e.
“
LookI
’
m goi
ngt
oasky
out
ospenda
ni
ghtwi
thaf
ri
endofmi
ne”
“
Whoi
sthat
?”
“
Nandi
”
“
NoLwandl
elwenkosi
,pl
easet
akemet
o
mom Bonga.
”
“
Snot
handodon’
tmaket
hingshar
dfor
meI
’
mrunni
ngoutoft
imeher
eyou
wantMi
rat
ogethur
t”
“
No!
”
“
Wor
kwi
thmet
hen”Ical
lNandi
asI
’
m
dr
ivi
ngt
oherpl
ace.I
t’
sver
ylat
eandI
’
m
sur
eshe’
ssl
eepi
ngnowbutI
’
m
desper
ate.
“
Lwandl
e”
“
Ineedy
ourhel
p”It
ell
herwhat
’sgoi
ng
onandsheagr
ees.
“
Ilov
eyoubut
i”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomunchki
ns”Iki
ssher
f
oreheadandhugher
.Wear
eatNandi
’
s
door
stepr
ightnow
“
Pleasebesaf
eLwandl
elwenkosi
”Nandi
say
swi
thsomuchconcer
n
“
Iwi
l
lint
hemeant
imepl
easekeep
cal
l
ingmyuncl
eandl
ethi
m knowokay
”
“
Okay
”Ihugherandski
ptomycart
hen
speedof
f.Thegoodt
hingi
sit
’sal
ready
l
atet
her
oadi
scl
ear
.If
eel
li
keI
’
m goi
ng
t
olosemymi
nd,
thet
houghtoft
hat
mot
herf
uckert
ouchi
ngmyDol
l
face
boi
l
smybl
ood.Howdar
ehenx
!He’
s
goi
ngt
opaybutr
ightnowIj
ustneedt
o
getDol
l
faceoutoft
hathousef
ast
.Ical
l
herIneedt
oheari
fshe’
sst
il
lokay
“
Lwenkosi
”Shesay
swi
thahoar
sev
oice
“
Arey
oust
il
lgood?
”
“
Yeah”shesni
ff
s
“
I’
m onmywayt
her
ebaby
,Iwi
l
lbet
her
e
wi
thi
n3hour
sjusthangi
nther
e”
“
Youar
eal
one?
”
“
YesIcan’
treachmypar
ent
snormy
uncl
ebutIwi
l
lkeept
ryi
ngt
hem r
ight
nowIhav
etogety
ououtoft
hathouse”
“
Pleasebesaf
e,y
ouknowhowIhat
e
y
oudr
ivi
ngatni
ght
”
“
Iwanty
out
obesaf
eforme.Don’
topen
t
hatdoorev
eni
fhet
hreat
ensy
ou
y
ezwa”
“
Iwon’
t”
“
Don’
thangupIj
ustwantt
oheart
hat
y
ouar
eokayev
eny
ourbr
eat
hingwi
l
l
keepmegoi
ngbef
oreIl
osemymi
nd”
“
Okay
”Ihav
enev
erspeedl
i
ket
hisi
nmy
l
i
fe.Tr
uert
omyest
imat
ionIar
ri
vei
n
Johannesbur
gwi
thi
n3hour
s.Ihav
e
t
wicedr
oveherher
esoIknowwher
e
shest
ays.
“
Dol
l
face”nor
espondf
uckIhav
erun
outofai
rt
ime,
shecal
l
smej
ustatt
hat
moment
.
“
I’
m out
sidehav
eyoupackedaf
ew
t
hingsy
ouwi
l
lneed”
“
Yes”
“
OkaycomeIwi
l
lbewai
ti
ngf
ory
ouat
t
hegat
ebutdon’
thangupj
usti
ncase
y
ougetcaughtt
henIwi
l
lmakemyway
i
n”
“
Okay
”Ihearsomeshuf
fl
ingandpr
ay
wi
thi
nmy
sel
fthatshemakesi
tout
wi
thoutbei
ngseen.Ti
mei
stwoo’
cl
ock
i
nthemor
ningandi
t’
sfr
eez
ing.Iseeher
comi
ngf
lashi
ngherphone.Thegood
t
hingi
sshehasherownr
emot
e.
“
Ohmydol
l
face”Isqueez
eheri
nmy
ar
msandshecr
ies
“
I’
m her
enow.
..Igoty
oual
way
s”Ipul
l
herbackandl
ookatheri
nherey
es
“
Didany
oneseey
ou”sheshakesher
headno
“
Letgetoutofher
ebef
oret
heynot
ice
y
ou’
vel
eft
”Iwi
pehert
ear
sandki
ssher
f
orehead.Toknowt
hatshe’
sher
ewi
th
menowIf
eel
abi
tbet
ter
.
“
Come”Iopent
hedoorf
orRockyatt
he
back
“
Geti
nsi
deboy
!”Hej
umpsi
nandIcl
ose
t
hedoort
henopent
hef
rontone.She
get
sinandIbuckl
eherupandcl
oset
he
doort
henj
ogt
omysi
de.Iputt
he
engi
nei
ntol
i
feanddr
iveof
f.
“
Thanky
ousomuchLwandl
elwenkosi
,I
wassoscar
ed”Ipul
lhert
omychest
wi
thmyot
herhandasIdr
ivewi
tht
he
ot
her
.
“
I’
m sor
ry,
Iwasn’
tther
etopr
otecty
ou”
“
Yousav
edmeandI
’
m sogr
atef
ulbut
mywor
ryi
swhatwi
l
lhedowhenhe
f
indsoutI
’
m gone”
“
Uyaz
ithusel
anj
emyf
atheranduncl
e
wi
l
ldeal
wit
hhi
m.Udaki
weumsunu
wakhenx
a!”
“
Hedi
dn’
thur
tyour
ight
”
“
He.
.het
ouchedmy.
.v.
..
vagi
na”Igr
oan.
Ihav
enev
ernotev
enoncehav
ea
t
houghtofki
l
li
ngsomeonebutr
ightnow
Iwantt
oki
l
lthi
sShakamanwi
thmy
bar
ehands!
“
I’
m sor
rybaby
”Iki
ssherf
orehead.I
l
ookupont
her
earmi
rr
orandIseeacar
f
oll
owi
ngus.I
t’
sbeenf
oll
owi
ngusa
whi
l
enow.It
urnt
hel
eftandt
hecari
s
r
ightbehi
ndme,
Ihi
ttheaccel
erat
or
har
dandhe’
sri
ghtbehi
nd.I
’
m now
al
armedt
hatt
heyar
efol
l
owi
ngus
“
Ohf
uck!
”
“
What
’sgoi
ngonLwenkosi
”
“
Theyar
efol
l
owi
ngus,
Ineedy
out
o
r
elax
.Iwi
l
ltr
ytol
oset
hem”Sheseat
s
upst
rai
ght
.
“
OhGod,
he’
sgoi
ngt
oki
l
lus”She
pani
cs
“
Rel
axbabypl
ease”Ev
eryt
urnIt
ake
t
heyar
eri
ghtbehi
ndme,
it’
scl
eart
hat
whoev
eri
sfol
l
owi
nguscanr
ace.Iup
myspeedandt
aker
ightt
hent
hat
’s
whenIl
oset
hem butIwantt
obesur
e
f
ir
stt
hati
t’
sal
lcl
ear
.
“
Ohhhshi
t!
”
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
what
’sgoi
ngonnow”
Ther
e’sacari
nfr
ontofusbl
ocki
ngt
he
r
oadandwhenIl
ookbackt
her
e’s
anot
herone.
“
Wear
escr
ewed!
”Myhear
tisbeat
ing
outofmychest
.I’
m soscar
edf
ormy
Dol
l
face,
Iwi
shIhadagun.Ther
e’s
nowher
etor
un,
Ipul
lov
er.
“
Whyar
eyoust
oppi
ng,
go
Lwandl
elwenkosi
!!
”Shecr
ies
“
Wear
egoi
ngt
o…”Ihearabangont
he
wi
ndowandMi
rascr
eams.Theydr
agus
outoft
hecar
“
Pleasebaf
ethudon’
thur
ther
,I’
m
beggi
ngy
ou”Theyar
ethr
eeoft
hem,
ev
eni
fIcant
ryt
ofi
ghtI
’
m out
number
ed.
Rockyi
sbar
kingnonest
op
“
Aymaant
ell
thi
sdogt
ost
opmaki
ng
noi
seorIwi
l
lshooti
t!
”Oneoft
hem
shout
s
“
Ohnopl
easedon’
t.
..
Rockycal
ms
down”Mi
rasay
s.Thet
hingi
swi
thgol
d
r
etr
iev
ersar
enothar
mful
butt
heycan
seedanger
.Hav
ingabl
i
ndgi
rl
fr
iendI
hadt
oteachandf
ami
l
iar
izemy
sel
fwi
th
herwor
ld.
“
Eksesaanar
eyounott
hatboywho
pl
aysSi
fungo”
“
YesIam,
pleasedon’
thur
tus”
“
Ilov
eyourchar
act
erbutI
’
m sor
ryboy
,
r
ightnowI
’
m ondut
y!”Hepunchesme
andIgr
oani
npai
n.
“
Iwi
l
lgi
vey
ouany
thi
ngpl
easel
etusgo”
Ibegbutt
heot
heronedr
agsMi
rat
othe
car
“
Lethergo!
”
“
Wedon’
twanty
ou,
wewanther
!”
“
Pleaseman!
”
“
Voet
sekmgodoy
i!
”Thet
all
one
scr
eamsandshootRocky
.Mi
racr
iesas
shehear
sherdogswai
l
ingpai
nful
l
y.I
t
f
all
sdownont
hef
loorandt
hatwasj
ust
t
heendofRocky
.Ihav
enev
erbeen
scar
edl
i
ket
hisi
nmyl
i
fe.
“
Wecan’
tlethi
m gowhati
fhecal
l
s
someone.Let
’st
akehi
mtoo!Ourboss
wi
l
lseewhathewi
l
ldowi
thhi
m!”They
pushmenex
ttoMi
raont
hebackseat
andIhol
dheri
nmyar
ms
“
Wher
e’sRockyLwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
I’
m sor
rybaby
”
“
No!
”Shebur
sti
ntot
ear
s
“
Eyv
oet
sekumsi
ndosf
ebe!
!”Idon’
t
knowwher
etheyar
etaki
ngus,
Ipr
ay
t
hatt
heydon’
thur
tus.Wear
edr
agged
t
osomest
inki
ngbl
oodywar
ehouse
whenwear
ri
ve.Mybodycr
ingewhenI
seehowbl
oodyt
hiswar
ehousei
s.Lor
d
pl
easedon’
tlett
hem ki
l
lus.
“
Cal
lthebossandt
ell
him wef
ound
t
hem”say
stheonewi
thascar
“
Guy
spl
ease,
Iwi
l
lpayy
oumor
ethan
whaty
ourbossi
spay
ingy
ou”They
l
aughatmel
i
keI
’
m cr
azy
“
Iwi
l
ldoany
thi
ngj
ustspar
emy
gi
rl
fr
iendl
i
fe”
“
Tel
lyourbi
tcht
oshutup!
!”Say
sthet
all
onet
hatki
l
ledRocky
.Ifhecanaki
l
la
gui
dedogl
i
ket
hatIf
earf
orourl
i
ves
“
Babypl
easedon’
tcr
y”
“
He’
snotanswer
inghi
sphone!Whatt
he
f
ucki
swr
ongwi
thhi
m now.
”
“
Guy
spl
ease,
I’
m beggi
ngl
etusgo.Iwi
l
l
gi
veal
lmybankspi
n,myphoney
ouwi
l
l
ev
ent
akemycarj
ustl
etusgo”Isay
l
ooki
ngatt
heonet
hatsai
dhel
i
kesmy
char
act
eronSi
fungo.
“
WoahRatmf
ethudon’
tcal
ltheboss”
“
EhBombadon’
ttel
lmey
ouwantt
olet
t
hem go!
”Say
sthet
all
oney
oucansee
t
hisonehav
enohear
tatal
l
“
Comeon,
braShakesmakesal
otof
moneywi
tht
hev
irgi
nsweabductf
or
hi
m mar
ausi
hol
elaamapeanut
s.
Asi
that
heni
leof
fery
alent
wanaandsay
wedon’
tfi
ndt
hem”
“
Youar
etal
ki
ngshi
tnow!Thi
sboy
’s
moneyi
snot
hingcompar
edt
obr
a
Shakesmoney
”.Ratsay
s.I
t’
sfunnyt
hat
he’
sRatbuthe’
sloy
alt
ohi
sboss.
“
Truebutwhatdowegethuh?Wear
e
t
heonewhodoal
ltheki
dnappi
ngand
hej
ustt
akest
hesev
irgi
nst
ohi
sny
anga
andmakeal
otofmoneywhi
l
ehegi
ves
usonl
ytensgodo.Whati
s10khuhi
nto
engay
ifakaekhal
eni
ley
o!”
“
Bombai
sri
ghtRatuy
agi
nqau-
bra
Shakes”
“
Ihav
e50konmyaccount
”Mi
rasay
s
“
Andy
oucel
ebr
it
yboy
!”Say
sRat
“
Ihav
e30k”
“
Hay
iincanel
emal
i
!”
“
ComeonRatmf
ethu80kt
hat
’sal
ot”
Bombasay
s
“
Plust
hecarmos,
it’
snotj
ustanycar
baba.Mer
cedeswecansel
li
ttobr
a
Nkl
eks”say
stheot
herone.I
t’
sseems
l
i
keRati
sthel
eaderoft
hisgr
oup.
“
Wher
ear
ethecar
ds?
”
“
Int
hecar
”Mi
raandIsay
“
Giv
emet
hepi
ns!
”Wet
ell
them ourpi
ns
“
Ihopeani
sishay
ashay
icozIwi
l
lfi
nd
y
ouandki
l
lyoumy
sel
f!
!”
“
We’
renotmanIswear
,youcangonow
andwi
thdr
awmoneyatt
heat
m.Just
gi
vememydr
iver
’sl
i
censepl
ease”
“
Bombagoandgethi
sli
censei
nthe
car
!”Bombamakeshi
swayoutand
comesbackwi
thmywal
l
et.Hegi
vesme
mydr
iver
’sl
i
cense
“
Thephones,
we’
ret
aki
ngt
hem t
oo!
”Oh
god
“
Howar
ewegoi
ngt
ocal
lforhel
pif
…”
“
Doy
out
hinkIcar
e!!
”Thi
sRatGuyi
s
scar
yandcr
uel
butI
’
m gl
adt
heyar
e
l
ett
ingusgo.
“
Canwegonow”Iask
“
Nosof
ast
”ohwhatnow.
“
Athi
ngi
thi
ukuz
ithol
akul
ekat
shana
l
akho”HespanksMi
rabut
tIcoul
dn’
t
hel
pmy
sel
fbutpunchhi
m.Ohshi
tbad
mov
eLwandl
e!Ver
ybadmov
e!
“
I’
m sor
rybr
a,pl
easedon’
thur
ther
!”
“
Yewenaf
orpunchi
ngmeI
’
m goi
ngt
o
hav
eheri
nfr
ontofy
ou!Woz
alawena”
Hegr
absMi
rawhocr
ies.
“
Hadebr
a,pl
easedon’
tdot
hat
.I’
m
beggi
ngy
ou”Ikneel
downont
hef
loor
andpl
eadwi
thhi
m ashecont
inues
t
ouchi
ngmyDol
l
facei
nappr
opr
iat
ely
.
“
Lwenkosi
please”Mi
racr
ies
“
OhIt
hinkIhav
eabet
terpl
any
ouknow
Ihav
eal
way
sfant
asi
zeaboutaguy
gi
vi
ngmeabl
owj
ob”IgaspnoLor
d
pl
ease.Il
ookathi
m andshakemyhead
“
Ahwel
lI’
m hav
ingmi
ssl
i
ttl
esi
nger
her
e”shebendsherov
er
“
Nononookayf
ine!Iwi
l
ldoi
t”
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
no!
”Hel
et’
sgoof
Mi
raandl
ooksatmewi
thasmi
rk
“
Comecel
ebr
it
yboy
”
“
Lwenkosi
please”shecr
iesbutIr
ather
gi
vet
hiscr
uel
guyabl
owj
obt
henal
l
ow
myDol
l
facet
ober
apedi
nfr
ontofme.I
cr
awl
towar
dshi
m andundohi
sbel
t
wi
thmyshaki
nghands.It
akeahuge
br
eat
heandpul
ldownhi
spant
s
t
oget
herwi
thhi
sbr
ief
s.Lor
dgi
vesme
st
rengt
hIgr
abhi
sfl
acci
dcockand
gi
vesi
tast
rokeunt
ili
tget
shar
d.
“
Ohy
essscel
ebr
it
yboyahhh”Hi
scock
smel
l
sofur
inehowam Igoi
ngt
oput
t
hisi
ntomymout
h.
“
Lif
akeeml
oyeni
cel
ebr
it
yboy
”(puti
t
i
nsi
dey
ourmout
h)Icl
osemyey
esand
puthi
sdi
cki
nmymout
h.
“
Ahhh”ewIf
eel
li
kepuki
ngbutIhol
dit
andst
artgi
vi
nghi
m abl
owj
ob.Hi
s
gr
oansar
emaki
ngangr
yanddi
sgust
ed.
Iwantt
obi
teof
fhi
sst
inkycockbut
whenIt
hinkofmydol
l
faceIcoul
dn’
t
al
l
owt
ori
ski
tli
ket
hat
.
“
Fuckcel
ebr
it
yboy
!!Ohaaaahshi
t!
”He
gr
absmyheadandpusheshi
sdi
ck
t
hroughmyt
hroatIf
eel
myt
ear
srol
l
ing
downasIchokeonhi
sdi
ck.I
’
m
suf
focat
ingbuthe’
snotpul
l
ingoutI
hearhi
mrel
easi
ngagr
owl
att
heback
ofhi
sthr
oatasheempt
ieshi
sseedi
n
myt
hroat
.It
hrowupr
ightaf
terhepul
l
s
out
.
“
Damncel
ebr
it
yboy
!”Hej
erksuphi
s
pant
s
“
Getoutofmysi
ght
!!
”Igetupf
rom t
he
f
loorandhol
dmydol
l
face’
shandaswe
headout
.
“
Youdi
dn’
thav
edot
hatLwenkosi
..
”
“
Youwant
edmet
owat
chhi
mrapey
ou
huh?Shutt
hef
uckupmaan!
!”Ipul
lher
t
omybackandwal
kwi
thher
.It
’sv
ery
dar
kandweseem t
obef
arawayf
rom
t
her
oad.Ikeepwal
ki
ngbutmyf
eetar
e
f
ail
i
ngme,
it’
sfr
eez
ing.Icanf
eel
my
sweat
erget
ti
ngwetwi
thhert
ear
sonmy
back.Iwal
kthr
ought
hebushandput
herdown.Atl
easti
t’
swi
nterandt
her
e
ar
enosnakesi
nwi
nterI
’
m sur
ewecan
hi
deher
eunt
ilt
hesunr
ise.It
akeof
fmy
sweat
eranddr
essherupt
henwesi
t
down.
“
I’
m sor
ryt
haty
ouhadt
ogot
hrough
t
hisbutIpr
omi
sey
out
hemomentt
he
sunr
isewewi
l
lgogethel
p”
“
Wher
e..
are.
.we?
”Shesay
sthr
oughher
cl
att
eri
ngt
eet
h.
“
Insomebush”she’
sshi
ver
ing
uncont
rol
l
abl
yIhol
dhercl
osei
nmy
ar
mshopi
ngmybodywi
l
lpr
oduce
enoughheatt
owar
m herupabi
t.
“
Wear
egoi
ngt
obeokay
,Ipr
omi
sey
ou.
I
’
m sor
ryIshout
edaty
ou”
“
I’
m sor
ryy
ouhadt
o..
to.
.got
hroughal
l
t
hispai
nbecauseofme
Lwandl
elwenkosi
I…”
“
Igoty
ouokay
,nowst
opcr
ying”Iwi
pe
hert
ear
sandki
ssherf
ace.Themoment
ofsi
l
encepassesusI
’
m sur
ewear
e
eachr
epl
ayi
ngt
heev
ent
sthatj
ustt
ook
pl
ace.Ican’
tfeel
mycheekst
heyar
e
numbduet
ocol
dnessandmyf
eetar
e
wor
se.Dol
l
faceont
heot
hersi
dei
sa
shi
ver
ingmessandshekeepsget
ti
ng
wor
seast
imepassesby
.OhGodi
t’
s
f
eel
sli
ket
imei
sdr
aggi
ng.
“
Lwan.
.dl
elw.
.enkosi
­”
“
Yesbaby
”
“
Ju.
.j
usti
ncaseIdon’
t.
.makei
tout
..
al
i
ve.
.tomor
rowj
ustknowt
hat
..Il
ove
y
ou.
.somuch”myhear
tbr
eaksi
nto
pi
eces
“
You,
youwi
l
lmakei
t!Youhav
etobaby
pl
easej
ustf
ewmor
ehour
spl
ease”The
l
astpar
tcomesoutaswhi
sper
.Icl
ose
myey
esandmyt
ear
sfal
lasIsayal
i
ttl
e
pr
ayerwi
thi
nmy
sel
f.
CHAPTER58

I
’
m bey
ondscar
ed,
Iwon’
tli
ebutmy
dad’
swor
dsar
eencour
agi
ngmet
obe
br
aveandf
acet
hissi
tuat
ionl
i
keaman
ast
heykeepr
ingi
ngi
nmyear
s
“
Kuz
omel
euqi
neubeuy
indoda
Lwandl
elwenkosi
andst
opbei
ngacr
y
baby
.Mi
rai
ssof
tandbr
oken,
sheneeds
ast
rongmanbyhersi
dewhowi
l
lbe
t
her
eforheremot
ional
l
y,spi
ri
tual
l
yand
phy
sical
l
ysi
yez
wana”Ineedt
obe
st
rong,
mor
eforhert
hanmy
sel
f.Ihat
e
t
hef
actt
hatI
’
m noti
ncont
rol
oft
he
si
tuat
ionandI
tbr
eaksmyhear
tthatshe
hadt
ogot
hroughal
lthi
str
auma.Ihope
t
hiswon’
tsetherback,
it’
sbeent
wo
mont
hsnowsi
nceshest
oppedt
aki
ng
herant
idepr
essant
s.Idon’
twanthert
o
getdepr
essedal
lov
eragai
n,she’
s
at
tendi
ngt
her
apyev
eryweekendasi
tis
andshehasbeenmaki
ngpr
ogr
ess.I
t’
s
herpsy
chol
ogi
stwor
dsnotmi
ne.Ipr
ay
t
hatwegethel
patsunr
ise,
wehav
e
beent
hroughat
raumat
icex
per
ience
andt
hisf
reez
ingweat
heri
snotdoi
ngus
anyj
ust
iceandt
imei
smov
ingsl
ow.
“
Dol
l
face”
“
Ye.
.s”shesay
sthr
oughhercl
enched
j
aws
“
Youar
est
il
lwi
thme?
”
”
Y..
es”
“
Pleasest
ayst
rongf
ormeI
’
m beggi
ng
sekuz
osay
ezwa”
“
IfIgi
veupnowt
hatwi
l
lmeany
ouwent
t
hroughal
loft
hispai
nfornot
hing,
I
won’
tal
l
owt
hatt
ohappenj
ustknowi
fit
happenskobekungasi
yoi
nhl
osoy
ami
”I
ki
ssherf
oreheadandpul
lhercl
ose.I
seeal
i
ghtf
lashi
ngt
hrought
hebush
andl
i
stencar
eful
l
yIcanhearf
emal
es
v
oicesappr
oachi
ngus.Ahi
ntofhope
engul
fsmebutwhati
fit
’sasetup.We
ar
eli
vi
ngi
nacr
uel
wor
ldwher
ewomen
can’
tbet
rust
edasmuchasmen.
“
Cany
ouheart
hat
?”Mi
rahast
heshar
p
ear
sev
er
“
Yes”
“
Let
’scal
lforhel
psot
hatt
heycansee
us”
“
Whati
ftheyar
epeopl
ethatwor
ksf
or
Shaka”
“
Whati
ftheyar
enot
”
“
Wecan’
tri
skl
i
ket
hat
”
“
Butt
heyar
eget
ti
ngcl
oser
”
“
Wehav
etogo”Wegetupandt
ryt
o
r
unbutt
heyhav
eal
readyseenusand
t
heyar
eli
ght
inguswi
tht
orches
“
Heeeyni
nawoz
ani
la!
”shout
sthe
woman.Ican’
tseecl
earduet
othe
t
orchest
hatar
edi
rect
edt
ous
“
Pleasedon’
thur
tus,
please”Isaywi
th
ashi
ver
ingv
oice
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
eint
heear
ly
hour
soft
hemor
ning!
”Thesame
womansay
s
“
Aunt
ydon’
tyouseet
hatt
heywer
e
hav
ingsex
”say
sanot
herv
oiceofa
f
emal
e
“
Shutupwena!
..
.mf
anakwenz
enj
ani
!”
(boywhat
’sgoi
ngon)
“
Wewer
erunni
ngawayf
rom somecr
uel
manwi
thhi
sguy
s.Theyt
ookev
ery
thi
ng
t
hatbel
ongt
ous”
“
Ohbant
wanabami
,I
’mr
eal
l
ysor
ry.
Laz
elonakal
aiz
wecomewi
thus”
“
Nowear
efi
ne”Isay
.
“
Wewon’
thur
tyou,
Ipr
omi
se”Thi
s
womansoundssi
ncer
eIf
oll
owmy
i
nst
inct
.
“
Ican’
tfeel
myl
egsLwandl
elwenkosi
,
howwi
l
lIwal
k”
“
Igoty
oubaby
”Iputheronmyback
andf
oll
owt
het
hreewomen.Wekeep
wal
ki
ngunt
ilIseeacarpar
kedont
he
r
oad.Wegeti
nanddr
iveof
f.
“
Awuv
ulel
okhuokushi
say
obay
agodol
a
l
abant
wana”(
opent
heai
rcor
nthese
ki
dsar
efr
eez
ing)I
’
m wonder
ingwhat
wer
e3womendoi
ngi
nabushi
nthe
ear
lyhour
soft
hemor
ning.Whati
fI
madeami
stakebyf
oll
owi
ngmyi
nst
inct
?
“
Youmadeagoodchoi
ce”myhear
t
ski
psabeatsot
heonesi
tt
ingwi
thusat
t
hebackseati
sami
ndr
eader
.
“
Youhav
enot
hingt
obescar
edabout
mf
anawami
”If
eel
heatci
rcul
ati
ng
ar
oundt
hecarandmydol
l
facest
opped
shi
ver
ingev
ent
ual
l
y
“
ikuphi
ekhay
a?”(
Wher
e’shome?
)
“
Dur
ban”
“
Sof
arwhatwer
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”I
ex
plai
ntoherwhathappened.
“
Khul
ulekani
bant
wanabami
seni
phephi
l
e”(
don’
twor
rymyki
dsy
ou
ar
esaf
enow)wear
ri
veatabi
gbeaut
if
ul
doubl
est
oryhouse.I
t’
sonl
ythenIsee
t
hatt
hesewomenar
esangomas
j
udgi
ngbyt
hecl
othest
heyar
ewear
ing.
I
’
m sur
etheywer
eint
hebusht
o
per
for
m someoft
hei
rri
tual
sther
e,don’
t
askmehowIknowt
hat
.Theyi
nsi
stwe
t
akeashowert
ogetr
idofcol
dinour
body
.Idon’
twantMi
raoutofmysi
ght
andI
’
m gr
atef
ult
heyar
enotmaki
ngi
ta
bi
gdeal
thatIwantt
oshowerwi
thher
.
Theyar
esangomasI
’
m sur
etheycan
seet
hatwear
eacoupl
einpr
ogr
ess.
Yepi
ntokaz
iphel
aay
ikangi
qomi
but
t
hat
'sani
ssuef
oranot
herday
.
“
Howar
eyourf
eetnow”
“
Bet
ter
”Ipul
lhert
omyar
msast
hehot
wat
erf
all
onust
aki
ngawayal
lthe
col
dnesswi
thi
nourbodi
es.
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Mir
a”
“
I’
m sor
r….
”It
urnherar
oundt
ofaceme
“
Stopsay
ingt
hatokay
”
“
ButI
…”Ishutherupwi
thmyf
ingeron
hermout
h
“
Idon’
twantt
otal
kabouti
t.Canwej
ust
f
ocusonget
ti
nghol
dofourpar
ent
sand
getoutofher
e”
“
Okay
”Oncewear
edonet
heygi
veus
war
m gownst
owearandweset
tl
eon
t
hecouchi
nthel
i
vingr
oom wi
tha
heat
eri
nfr
ontofus.Theybr
ingushot
chocol
ateandwesi
poni
t.
“
Ningobani
amagama”askst
heol
d
woman.
“
I’
m Lwandl
elwenkosi
andt
hisi
s
Mi
racl
e”
“
She’
sindeedami
racl
e”Idon’
tknow
whatt
hatmeansbutIj
ustnod.
“
Cany
oubor
rowusaphoneweneedt
o
cal
lourpar
ent
s”
“
Okay
”shet
akest
hephonef
rom t
he
cof
feet
abl
eandgi
vesme.Ti
mer
eads5
i
nthemor
ning,
Idi
almom butI
tsends
met
ovoi
cemai
li
twasaj
ustt
ryont
hat
one.Ical
lmal
umest
il
lIcan’
treachhi
m.
“
Doy
ouknowy
ourmom’
snumber
Mi
ra?
”
“
Yes”shecal
l
sitoutandIcal
lherbut
r
ecei
vesamer
esul
tsasuncl
e’
s.Whyt
he
f
uckar
ethei
rphonesof
f!
!

-
“
Ican’
tgetenoughofy
ou”Hesay
s
pant
ingont
opofme.Iwaswokenby
hi
mthr
ust
ingdeepi
ntomycunt
.Icoul
d
getuset
omor
ningsl
i
ket
his.Lastni
ght
af
terourdi
nnerwecheckedi
nahot
el
andhemadesweetl
ovet
omeal
lni
ght
l
ong,
I’
m abi
tsor
e.
“
Mor
ningMsi
mangoul
alekanj
ani
”(how
di
dyousl
eep)
“
Mor
ningst
handwasami
.Isl
ept
wonder
ful
andy
ou?
”
“
Isl
eptwel
ltoo.Whatt
imei
snow?
”I
ask
“
Letmecheck”Hepul
l
soutandr
oll
s
downf
rom mebef
orest
ret
chi
ngt
otake
hi
sphone.Heswi
tchesi
tonand
messagescomet
hroughsomeoft
hem
ar
evoi
cemessagessohel
i
stenst
o
t
hem.
“
Shi
t!
”
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Wher
e’sy
ourphone?
”
“
it
’sathome”
“
Wehav
etogetgoi
ng,
getup”
“
What
’sgoi
ngon”
“
NokubongaIsai
dgetup!
!”Heshout
sI
l
ookathi
m per
plex
ed
“
Whydi
dyoul
eav
eyourphoneathome.
Mi
rahav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
ogethol
dofus
butshecoul
dn’
treachus.Nandi
lef
ta
messaget
hatLwandl
elwenkosi
wentt
o
Johannesbur
gtosav
eMi
raappar
ent
ly
she’
sindanger
”myhear
tski
psabeat
“
Whatdoy
oumeanshe’
sindanger
!”
“
Idon’
tknowokayal
lIknowi
s
Lwandl
elwenkosi
wentt
her
etosav
eher
.
Youhav
etogetupBonga.Iwi
l
ldr
ive
y
ouhomeandgot
oJohannesbur
g”
“
I’
m goi
ngwi
thy
ou!
”IsayasIj
umpout
ofbed
“
Noy
ouar
enot
!”
“
HeyKhuz
ani
,that
’smydaught
ersoI
’
m
comi
ngwi
thy
ou!
”Iski
ptot
hebat
hroom
t
ofr
eshenupqui
ckl
y.Ican’
thel
pbut
f
eel
gui
l
tyt
hatwhenmydaught
er
neededme,
Iwasbusyf
ucki
ngt
he
whol
eni
ght
.Ihopeshe’
ssaf
enkosi
yami
.
If
indKont
hephonepaci
ngupand
down.
“
Yes.
..
tr
ackhi
scar
..
.Johannesbur
g..
­.
I’
m
beggi
ngy
ouman.
.t
hanky
ou”
“
Wear
egoi
ngt
otakemyf
ri
endsj
et.The
dr
iveri
sal
readyont
hewayt
otakeust
o
t
heai
rpor
t.
”Hesay
scl
enchi
nghi
sjaws.
“
Sowher
eisDudui
nal
lthi
sandwhyi
s
Nandi
theonet
hatknowsaboutt
his?
”
“
BecauseLwandl
elwenkosi
askedNandi
t
olookaf
terSno.Hest
art
edatmypl
ace
buthecoul
dn’
tfi
ndme.Dammi
tIf
eel
so
hor
ri
ble!
”
“
Met
oowhati
f…”
“
Nononodon’
tsayt
hat
”Hepul
l
smet
o
hi
sar
msandhi
sphoner
ings
“
Khuz
ani
Msi
mango.
..
Lwandl
elw­
enkosi
ohboywher
ear
eyou.
..
isMi
raokay
..
.I
knowboyandI
’
m sor
ryj
ustt
ell
uswher
e
ar
eyou.
..
wear
eonourwayokay
”He
hangup
“
Whatdoeshesay
”
“
Hesai
dhewi
l
lex
plai
nev
ery
thi
ngwhen
wegett
her
ebutt
heyar
ebot
hfi
ne.
Appar
ent
lysomewomanhel
pedt
hem
whent
heywer
ehi
dingi
nabush”my
hear
tst
opsbeat
ing
“
Bush?Hi
ding?Kant
ikwenz
ekeni
Khuz
ani
”Iaskwi
thacr
yingv
oice
“
Idon’
tknowbutwewi
l
lfi
ndoutwhen
wewegett
her
e”Thedr
iverar
ri
veswe
st
artatK’
shousef
ir
stt
henhet
akeust
o
t
heai
rpor
twher
ewegeti
ntot
hej
ett
o
Johannesbur
g.Lesst
henanhourwe
ar
ri
veandt
her
e’sacarwai
ti
ngf
orust
o
t
akeuswher
eMi
raand
Lwandl
elwenkosi
are.I
tpul
l
sov
ernex
t
t
othebi
gdoubl
est
oryhouse.Khuz
ani
t
akesmyhandaswemakeourwayi
n.A
sangomai
nherl
atesi
xti
eswel
comesus.
“
Greet
ings”
“
Wear
eMi
raandLwandl
elwenkosi
’
s
par
ent
s”
“
Ohy
escomei
n,t
heyar
eint
hel
i
ving
r
oom”shel
eadst
hewayt
othel
i
ving
r
oom,
myhear
tist
huddi
ng.I
’
m scar
ed
ofasi
tuat
ionImi
ghtf
indmydaught
eri
n.
Themomentwemakeourwayi
n
Lwandl
elwenkosi
seesus.Hel
ooks
dr
ainedandpi
ssedatt
hesame
“
Real
l
ymal
umer
eal
l
yumunt
usengaz
e
af
eni
val
eamaf
oni
!”
“
Wear
esor
ryLwandl
elwenkosi
”Isay
“
Mommy
!”Mi
raget
supf
rom t
hecouch
andImeetherhal
fwayandsqueez
eher
i
nmyar
ms
“
OhbabyI
’
m sor
ry”Shebur
sti
ntot
ear
s
andIcoul
dn’
thel
pbutal
l
owmi
net
ofal
l
t
oo.
“
Iwassoscar
edmama”
“
I’
m her
ebaby
,I'
m her
enowandI
’
mver
y
sor
ryy
oucoul
dn’
treachme”
“
I’
m sor
ry,
comeher
emyboy
”Ksay
s
andLwandl
elwenkosi
thr
owhi
msel
fon
hi
sar
msandweepsi
l
ent
ly.Icanf
eel
t
hatt
heyhav
ebeent
hrought
hewor
st
andI
’
m notsur
eIwantt
ohearwhatt
hey
wi
l
lsayt
ous.Weset
tl
edownont
he
couchandIhol
dmydaught
er,
whoi
s
st
il
lcr
yingi
nmyar
ms.
“
I’
m gl
adt
haty
oucame,
wef
oundt
hese
t
wohi
dingi
nthebush.Meand
amat
hwasaami
wentt
her
etoper
for
m
somer
it
ual
sandt
hat
’showwesaw
t
hem”
“
Oht
hanky
ousomuchmama”Isay
“
Mir
awhathappenedhowdi
dyouand
Lwandl
elwenkosi
endupi
nabush?
Wher
ewasDudu?
”
“
Iwasscar
edmama”
“
Ofwhatmybaby
”sheex
plai
nst
ome
ev
ery
thi
ngdi
ff
erentemot
ionsengul
fs
mebutangerov
erpower
est
heot
her
ones.Shakauy
angi
hlany
elaucat
hi
ngaz
alel
ayenay
ini
.
“
Whatki
ndofaf
atheri
she!Ihav
etot
ell
mysi
ster
,shedeser
vest
oknowshehas
acr
uel
husband!
!”
“
Ineedy
out
ocal
m downnowBonga,
wehav
etobesmar
taboutt
hisShaka
mi
ghtt
urnal
loft
hisonMi
raandi
twi
l
l
behar
dfory
oursi
stert
obel
i
eveus”
“
Idon’
tcar
e,i
fshedoesn’
twantt
o
bel
i
eveusokwakhel
okhobutmi
naI
won’
tlett
hisbast
ardgetawaywi
th
v
iol
ati
ngmydaught
er!
”
“
Letmehandl
ethi
spl
ease,
youar
e
angr
yri
ghtnowandIunder
stand”It
ake
adeepbr
eat
h.I
’
m boi
l
ingwi
thanger
.
Mi
racar
ri
esonnar
rat
ingt
heev
ent
sthat
happenedunt
ilLwandl
elwenkosi
cuther
of
fandcont
inuehi
msel
f.
“
OhLwandl
elwenkosi
thanky
ouso
muchf
orsav
ingmydaught
er”
“
Don’
tbeashamedLwenkosi
…”
“
ShutupMi
ra!
”Roar
sLwandl
elwenkosi
I
’
m notsur
ewhatt
heyar
etal
ki
ngabout
buti
t’
sseemsl
i
keLwandl
elwenkosi
doesn’
twantust
oknowsomet
hingt
hat
happened.
“
I’
m gl
adt
haty
out
woar
esaf
eboy
,I’
m
sopr
oudofy
ou”Say
sKandgi
ves
Lwandl
elwenkosi
asqueez
eonhi
s
shoul
der
“
TheyshotRockymama”shesobs
“
Ohbaby
,I’
m sor
ryIwi
l
lgety
ouanot
her
dog”
“
ButI
twi
l
lnev
erbel
i
keRocky
”
“
Iknowsweet
hear
t,pl
easedon’
tcr
y”I
wi
pehert
ear
s,she’
sbr
eaki
ngmyhear
t
whenshecr
iesl
i
ket
his.
“
Mamangabeumabani
”Iask
“
OhMaMdl
uli
”
“
Siy
abongakakhul
uMamaMdul
i
Lukhel
e
Ny
oka,
Sikhangi
sa,
Nz
imande,
Bheki
sway
o!MayGodbl
essy
ou”Isay
“
Ohbant
wanabami
kubongami
na”(
oh
mychi
l
drenI
’
mtheonewho’
sthankf
ul)
“
Uthengeunemenadi
mama”(
buyacool
dr
inkmom)Ksay
sashepl
acesar
oll
of
t
wohundr
edsnot
esont
hegl
asst
abl
e
“
Awbant
wanabami
youdon’
thav
eto
payme”
“
Wear
ejustshowi
ngappr
eci
ati
on
mama,
don’
ttakei
tasapay
mentbutas
usshowi
ngourgr
ati
tude”Ksay
s
“
Buty
our
eal
l
ydon’
thav
eto”
“
Wei
nsi
st”Twoy
oungsangoma’
swal
ks
i
nwi
tht
eaandbi
scui
ts
“
Thanky
ou”wehav
eteaandbi
scui
ts
ov
eragener
alchatandwhenwear
e
donewet
hankMaMdl
uli
fort
hel
ast
t
ime,
sheaskst
ohav
eawor
dwi
thmei
n
pr
ivat
e.Khuz
ani
,Lwandl
elwenkosi
and
Mi
rawal
ksaway
.
“
YeboMa”Il
ookather
“
Abaphansi
abanemei
ndl
elaowahamba
ngay
oekhay
a”(
Theancest
orsar
enot
happyt
hewayy
oul
efthome)
“
OhIsee”
“
Yebousi
siwakhoakakahl
angani
nomndeni
,umundeni
awuf
uni
ukumamukel
aemndeni
ningenx
a
y
ent
ukut
hel
onenz
ondoanay
o
ngal
esenz
oowasenz
a”(
Yessi
syour
si
steri
snotuni
tedwi
thy
ourf
ami
l
y,t
hey
don’
twantt
oacceptherbecauseoft
he
angerandhat
redshehasr
egar
ding
whaty
oudi
d)Ishi
ftuncomf
ort
abl
yon
t
hecouch,
thi
sisget
ti
ngdeepnow.
“
Lenz
ondonent
ukut
hel
oanay
ongawe
y
awel
anakwi
ndodakz
iyakho,
kwakungamel
eiphi
l
eindodakaz
iyakho
kodwauNkunkul
unkul
unabaphansi
abangav
uma.
”(Theangerandhat
red
shehasony
oui
sal
sodi
rect
edt
oyour
daught
er,
shewasnev
ersupposedt
o
makei
toutal
i
vebutGodandt
he
ancest
orsr
efused)
“
Ngi
yakuz
wamama”(
Iheary
oumama)
“
Youhav
etogobackhome,
tal
ktoy
our
f
atherandwor
kthi
ngsout
…”
“
Wit
hal
lduer
espect
,I’
m notgoi
ngt
odo
t
hat
”
“
Iknowi
t’
shar
dtodot
her
ightt
hingbut
y
ourdaught
erhassuf
fer
edenoughf
or
y
oursi
ns.Setherf
reenowf
rom al
lthe
pai
nandsuf
fer
ing.
”
“
Hay
imakhosi
thi
sisunf
air
,whyam I
t
heonewhohast
ohumbl
emy
sel
fwhen
myf
atheri
stheonet
hati
swr
ongher
e”
“
Youar
eachi
l
datt
heendoft
hedaybut
he’
sawar
eofwhathedi
dtoy
ouandhe
knowshewaswr
ong”
“
Thenhemustcomet
omeand
apol
ogi
zenott
heot
herwayar
ound.I
’
m
l
eav
ing”Igetupandl
eav
e.

-
I
’
minar
est
aur
antwai
ti
ngf
orsox
’s
uncl
e.It
ri
ckedmymot
heri
nlawand
andmanaget
ogethi
scont
act
s.Ineed
t
otal
ktohi
m bef
oreev
ery
thi
ngt
urni
nto
amess.Hewal
ksi
nandspotmet
hen
makehi
swayt
ome
“
Ntokaz
i”
“
Hi”Hesi
tsdown
“
Whoi
sthef
atheroft
heki
dsy
ouar
e
car
ryi
ng?
”
“
Mpendul
o.Pl
easeIwantt
okeepour
ni
ghtt
oour
sel
ves.Il
ovey
ournephew
andt
hiswi
l
lhur
thi
m pl
ease.Wewer
e
bot
hdr
unkandnott
hinki
ngst
rai
ght
”
“
IfIdon’
ttel
lhi
m whatdoIgeti
nret
urn”
“
Any
thi
ng”
“
Whenev
erIwantt
ofucky
ou,
youwi
l
l
av
ail
your
sel
f”Igasp
“
Youwantmet
ocheatonmyhusband?
”
“
Youhav
eal
readydonet
hatmoswhat
's
new?
”
“
Nosaysomet
hingel
sepl
ease”
“
Ahwel
lIwi
l
ltel
lmynephew.Letme
cal
lhi
m now”Het
akeshi
sphone
“
Nodon’
t,
it’
sfi
ne!
”
“
Finewhat
?”
“
Whenev
ery
ouwantme”
“
Goodgi
rl
”Hesmi
rks,
goshGuguwhat
hav
egoty
our
sel
fint
o?
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayPat
ienceNt
oi

CHAPTER59

Ican’
tst
opmyt
ear
sandt
hese
hor
monesar
emaki
ngi
twor
se.
Ev
ery
thi
ngseem t
obespi
ral
l
ingoutof
cont
rol
.TheDl
ami
niuncl
eswentt
omy
par
ent
s’housef
orl
obol
anegot
iat
ions
butmydaddi
dn’
tal
l
owt
hem i
n.Hesai
d
hehasnochi
l
dbyt
henameofGugu.I
t
act
ual
l
yhur
tst
hatIhav
ebecomean
or
phanwhi
l
emypar
ent
sar
est
il
lal
i
ve,
j
ustbecauseofast
upi
dcour
se!Dad
t
hinkssi
ncehe’
sint
obusi
nesswemust
bel
i
kehi
m,i
t’
sir
kingt
hehel
loutofme.I
don’
tunder
standhowmymot
heral
l
ows
t
his.

Khuboni
hasn’
taskedf
orsexi
nthepast
3day
sbutIknowsoonhewi
l
landI
don’
tknowwhatIwoul
ddobecauseI
don’
twantt
osl
eepwi
thhi
m.What
happenedt
hatni
ghtwasami
stakeandI
wasdr
unk.I
’
m notev
enat
tr
act
edt
ohi
m,
y
eshe’
shandsomeandal
lbuthe’
s
def
ini
tel
ynotmySox
.
Noonewi
l
lev
erbemyhusband.Il
ove
t
hatmansomuchandI
’
m notpr
epar
ed
t
olosehi
m,notnow,
notev
er.Whenev
er
If
eel
alone,
andmi
ssi
ngmymom,
I
knowt
hathe’
sher
eforme.Myphone
r
ingsandIansweri
t
“
Hel
l
o”
“
Gugu”
“
Mama”Igaspwi
thshock
“
Ohmt
anami
,I
’m sor
ry”
“
Imi
ssy
oumama,
Iwantt
ocomeback
home”
“
Youknowhowy
ourf
ather
….”
“
Kodwamamawhyar
eyoual
l
owi
ngt
his
huh?Dadki
ckedmeoutf
oral
ousy
cour
se!
”
“
Youshoul
dhav
eli
stenednaweGugu”
“
Real
l
yMamai
sthatwhaty
oucal
l
edme
f
orv
ele?
”
“
No,
Ijustwant
edt
ocheckony
ou”
“
Youst
il
lhav
emynumber
sbuty
ou
nev
ercal
lme,
wow”
“
Hemoni
tor
smycal
l
s.Ihav
etogo,
he’
s
comi
ng”
“
Mawai
….”Shehungups.Ibur
sti
nto
t
ear
s,whathav
eIdonet
othi
sli
femar
a.
Myphonepi
ngsIl
ookati
t
“
I’
m sendi
ngadr
ivert
ocomepi
cky
ou
up”i
t’
sfr
om Khuboni
.Lor
dpl
easet
ake
me!
-

I
t’
sbeen3day
ssi
ncet
heShakasaga
andI
’
m gl
adt
hatmydaught
erseemst
o
behandl
i
ngt
hei
nci
dentmuchbet
ter
t
hanIt
houghtshewoul
d.
“
Lookaty
ou,
mybr
otheri
str
eat
ingy
ou
wel
l
.Youar
ebeaut
if
ulandgl
owi
ng!
”I
gi
ggl
e
“
Thanky
ousi
s”wehugbef
oresi
tt
ing
down.
“
Hav
eyouor
der
ed?
”
“
No”shecal
l
sthewai
terandpl
aceour
or
der
.
“
Wel
lther
e’sj
ustsomet
hingabouty
ou”
shesay
slooki
ngatmeasi
fshe’
s
st
udy
ingme
“
What
?”Iask
“
Idon’
tknow,
itcan’
tonl
ybet
hedi
ck
gl
ow,
you’
reex
tramaan”Il
augh
“
Ohmay
bey
ouj
ustdon’
twantt
oadmi
t
t
hatIwasbor
nbeaut
if
ulv
ele”Iy
ankmy
weav
ewi
tht
hehandt
hathasmyr
ing
dr
amat
ical
l
y
“
Ohmy
!Ist
hiswhatIt
hinki
tis?
”
“
Yephepr
oposed”
“
WowI
’
m sohappyf
ory
ousi
s,l
etme
seet
her
ing”Igi
vehermyhand
“
It
’sbeaut
if
ulBonga,
whochoset
his
r
ing”
“
Him obv
iousl
y”
“
Ayngekehepr
obabl
yhadashop
assi
stanthel
phi
m”
“
Ushoukut
hiumny
eni
wami
akana
t
ast
e?”(
Soy
ousay
ingmyhusband
doesn’
thav
etast
e)Shel
aughs
“
Vel
e,especi
all
ywheni
t’
scomest
o
t
heset
hings,
doesheev
ent
akey
ouout
nj
e”Ipokehercausi
ngt
oherl
augh
“
I’
m happyf
ory
ousi
swami
,your
eal
l
y
deser
vet
his.Sowheni
stheweddi
ng?
”
“
Wehav
en’
tsett
hedat
eyetbutIwanta
smal
landi
nti
mat
eweddi
ng”
“
Smal
landi
nti
mat
eforwhat
?Hai
bo
Bongat
hisi
syourf
ir
stweddi
ngi
thast
o
bebi
gandbeaut
if
ul”
“
Whywast
emoneyonabi
gweddi
ngZo”
Ourf
oodi
sbr
oughtandwedi
gin
“
Ha.
ahmusaukubai
sal
ukwaz
i
Nokubonga.Youar
enotwast
ingmoney
byhav
ingaweddi
ngofy
ourdr
eam”
“
Mydr
eam weddi
ngi
ssomet
hingsmal
l
andi
nti
mat
e”shegr
oansi
ndef
eatandI
chuckl
e.Zoi
sli
ket
hat
,It
hinkshe
shoul
dhav
ebeenanev
entpl
anner
i
nst
eadofadoct
or.She’
sreal
l
ygoodi
n
t
hatdepar
tment
,thet
hingi
sshedoesn’
t
knowt
hemeani
ngof“
int
imat
e”
“
Youhav
enoi
deahowl
ongIhav
ebeen
wai
ti
ngf
ormybr
othert
ogetmar
ri
ed
onedayt
othewomanofhi
sdr
eam and
nowt
hati
t’
shappeni
ng,
you’
redeny
ing
me.
.”Icutherof
fwi
thl
aught
er
“
Emot
ional
blackmai
l
”
“
KodaBongay
ouar
emoni
edt
o
compl
ainaboutwast
ingmoney
”
“
Idon’
tenj
oyspendi
ngi
tZo,
I’
m not
enj
oyi
ngt
hisl
uxur
iousl
i
feKhumal
olef
t
f
orme.I
tfeel
ssowr
ongnj
e”
“
OhBongabuthewasy
ourhusband,
it’
s
notl
i
key
oust
olei
t.Yougoti
tfai
rand
squar
e.Youdeser
vei
tespeci
all
yaf
ter
t
hepai
nheputy
out
hrough.Iknow
moneycannev
erheal
thepai
nheput
y
out
hroughbutt
akei
tascl
osur
eyou
know”
“
Iwast
hinki
ngofsi
gni
ngupev
ery
thi
ng
t
oKhany
iasshe’
sthemot
herof
Khumal
o’ssonunt
ilt
hesoni
sol
d
enought
otakecar
eofhi
sfat
her
’s
busi
nesses”
“
Ever
ythi
ngi
ncl
udi
ngt
het
rucki
ng
company
?”
“
Yonanj
ekakhul
ukaz
i”
“
YhooBongat
hat
’sex
treme,
wenausal
e
nani
”
“
Iwantt
ost
artaf
reshZo,
Ifeel
li
keas
l
ongasI
’
m st
il
ll
iv
ingunderKhumal
o’s
r
oof
,eat
inghi
smoney
,bei
ngcl
othedby
hi
smoney
,br
eat
hinghi
smoney
,Iwon’
t
mov
eony
ouknow.
”Todayatt
heAA
meet
ing,
wehadani
nter
est
ing
di
scussi
onr
egar
dingmov
ingon,
andI
t
hinkf
ormet
omov
eon,
Ihav
etol
etgo
ofev
ery
thi
ngt
hatgott
odowi
thmypast
.
“
Iheary
ousi
sbutIt
hinki
t’
smor
eabout
puni
shi
ngy
our
sel
fforwhaty
oudi
dto
Khumal
othanmov
ingon,
youf
eel
li
ke
y
oudon’
tdeser
veal
lthemoneyhel
eft
f
ory
ou”
“
NoI
’
m notIwantaf
reshst
artev
eni
fI
hav
etost
artr
ent
ingabackr
oom.Mi
ra
wi
l
ltakecar
eofmeunt
ilIgetonmyf
eet
,
may
best
artupabusi
ness.Ineedt
o
secur
eMi
ra’
sfut
ureZo.Mangaf
amanj
e
umt
anami
uzoy
enz
enj
ani
?”(
IfIdi
enow
whatwi
l
lmydaught
erdo?
)
“
Phel
aev
ery
thi
ngy
ouownwi
l
lbe
Mi
ra’
s”
“
TheKhumal
o’scancomebackand
cl
aim ev
ery
thi
ng,
lookwhatt
heyal
most
di
dtome.Mydaught
erwi
l
lbegr
iev
ing
andhav
enot
imet
ofi
ghtf
orweal
th”
“
Yourdaught
erwi
l
lnev
ersuf
ferwhi
l
e
I
’
m st
il
lal
i
veBongasoi
sKhuz
ani
”
“
IknowZo,
Iknow”Ihat
emy
sel
ffornot
st
andi
ngupt
oKhumal
owhenhet
old
met
obeahousewi
febecausenowI
woul
dhav
eknownt
hatshoul
dthe
unt
hinkabl
ehappent
ome,
mydaught
er
wi
l
lbesecur
ed.It
houghtIhav
erunout
oft
imet
osecur
eherf
utur
eandt
hatuse
t
obr
eakmyhear
tespeci
all
yaf
terI
not
icedt
hatsi
ngi
ngi
sherpassi
onand
weknowhowunpr
edi
ctabl
ethemusi
c
i
ndust
ryi
s,henceIdi
dn’
twanthert
o
dat
eSox
.Imi
ghthav
ecomeacr
ossas
under
mini
ngbutIhadmyr
easons.
“
Don’
tbehast
eaboutt
his,
thi
nkokay
butwhat
everdeci
siony
oumakeIwi
l
l
suppor
tyou”
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
isnothi
msel
fev
er
si
ncet
hatni
ght
”
“
It
’sunder
standabl
etheywentt
hrougha
t
raumat
icex
per
iencebutIf
eel
li
kebot
h
oft
hem ar
ehi
dingsomet
hing.I
r
ememberwhenMi
raex
plai
nedwhat
happenedLwandl
elwenkosi
cutherof
f
mi
dwayasi
fhedi
dn’
twantMi
rat
o
ment
ionsomet
hing”
“
Iwi
l
ltal
ktohi
m,I
’
m wor
ri
edabouthi
m.
Whathappenedt
oShaka”
“
Khuz
ani
sai
dhewi
l
ldeal
wit
hit
”
“
Sowhatdi
dyousayt
oyoursi
ster
aboutMi
ranotst
ayi
ngwi
tht
hem
any
mor
e?”
“
Shedoesn’
tknowy
et,
wej
ustt
oldher
t
hatKamar
iai
snotwel
lsoMi
rahadt
o
comeassoonaspossi
ble.Iknowi
t
doesn’
tmakesenseconsi
der
ingt
heway
Mi
ral
eft
,shecoul
dhav
eatl
eastsai
d
goodby
ebutIknowShakaknowst
hat
weknow”
“
Ukhohl
akel
auShaka!
”
“
Hedeser
vesj
ail
loy
o!If
eel
sor
ryf
ormy
si
stershame”
“
It
’shear
t-
breaki
ng”
“
Thewomant
hatf
oundt
hem i
nthe
bushuy
angi
hlany
elay
az.Shesai
dI’
m
t
heonewhohast
ogoandapol
ogi
zet
o
dad,
cany
oui
magi
neaf
tert
hepai
nhe
putmet
hrough”
“
Okayst
artf
rom t
hebegi
nni
ng”Iex
plai
n
t
oher
“
Thi
ssounddeepBonga”
“
Andunf
air
!”
“
CanIt
ell
youwhatIt
hink?
”
“
Iknowwhaty
ougoi
ngt
osay
.I’
m not
doi
ngi
tZol
eka,
whymustIhav
eto
humbl
emy
sel
ftot
hatman?
”
“
Unt
ilwhenwi
l
lyoubeangr
yathi
m
Bonga”
“
Unt
ilhecomesandapol
ogi
ze,
nott
he
ot
herwayar
ound”
“
Butt
hisi
snotonl
yabouty
ou,
r
emembery
ourdaught
eri
sal
so
i
nvol
ved.I
t’
sunf
airIunder
standbut
t
hinkabouther
.”
“
Hai
suka,
Idon’
tunder
standhow
ev
ery
thi
ngMi
ragoest
hroughgott
odo
wi
thmysi
ster
’sanger
.Di
dmysi
ster
makeKhumal
otobeatmeup?Di
dshe
makeKhuz
ani
toseekf
orr
evenge?Di
d
shemakemet
oki
l
lKhumal
o?Make
Spi
dert
okeepMi
raawayf
rom me?
MakeShakat
obear
api
st?Hay
iit
’s
doesn’
tmakesense”
“
Toomuchbadl
uckBonga,
don’
tyou
see?Pl
easet
hinkaboutt
hisngi
yakucel
a.
Wehav
ebecomef
ami
l
ynowsowhi
ch
meanswhensomet
hingbadhappenes
t
oMi
raweal
lwor
ry.Wedon’
twantbad
l
ucknow,
wehav
eaweddi
ngt
opr
epar
e”
“
I’
m meet
ingKhuz
ani
’
smom t
his
ev
eni
ng”y
esI
’
m changi
ngt
het
opi
c
“
Iseewhaty
ouar
edoi
ng….
shewi
l
lli
ke
y
ou,
shehasbeennaggi
ngabout
Khuz
ani
set
tl
ingdown”
“
Ihopesoubukekaedel
elal
oyamama”
(
Shel
ooksl
i
keshemi
ghtber
ude)
“
Wukabi
uyaf
anansenomamaz
ala
wami
”(t
oomuchshe’
sli
kemymot
heri
n
l
aw)
“
Ihopeshewi
l
lbehav
e,Ihav
eno
st
rengt
hformonst
eri
nlawdr
ama.
Khosi
isgi
vi
ngmeahar
dti
measi
tis”
“
Khosi
who?
”
“
Yourcol
l
eague”
“
Makhosi
Mkhwanaz
i,howdoy
ouknow
her
?”
“
She’
sKhuz
ani
’
sexf
uckbuddyandnow
shewant
stobr
eakusup.Youwon’
t
bel
i
evewhatshedi
d”Iex
plai
nfur
ther
“
HawukodaKhuz
ani
madodaoutofal
l
womani
nthi
swor
ldwhyKhosi
,that
womani
snotst
abl
eupst
air
sIhav
e
hear
dscar
yst
ori
esabouther
”
“
Whatki
ndofst
ori
es?
”
“
Letmej
ustsayshedoesn’
ttake
r
eject
ionwel
l
.Uy
ahl
any
aloy
amf
azi
I
hopeKhuz
ani
putheri
nherpl
ace”
“
Ihopesot
oo”spendi
ngt
imewi
thZoi
s
al
way
sni
ceaf
terourbr
unchwel
eav
e,
dr
ivi
ngsepar
atel
y.
“
Heybaby
”Isayt
omydaught
erasI
set
tl
enex
ttoher
,shehasheadset
son
herear
swi
thheri
Padonherhands.She
di
dn’
tev
enseemewal
ki
ngi
n,whati
s
sheengr
ossedi
n?It
akeof
fher
headset
s
“
Ma,
youar
eback”
“
Yes,
whatar
eyoubusywi
th”
“
Not
hing!
”
“
Itdi
dn’
tlookl
i
kenot
hingt
ome,
letme
see”
“
Noma!
”Ipeekal
i
ttl
ebi
tandgi
ggl
e
“
HeeeMi
ra,
whodoy
ouwantt
ogi
vea
bl
owj
obt
onow?
”
“
Goshmamar
eal
l
ynow!
”Sheget
sup
andt
akeshernewmuf
fi
n.Shehadt
o
buyanewcanesi
nceRockyi
snomor
e
butIwantt
ogetheradogev
ent
hough
i
t’
sapr
ocess.
“
Ihopey
ouar
egoi
ngt
ogi
ve
Lwandl
elwenkosi
,hedeser
vesi
t”Isay
gi
ggl
i
ngasshedi
sappear
soutofmy
si
ght
.Ti
mef
lyv
eryf
ast
,bef
oreIknowi
t
Ihav
etopr
epar
eformy
sel
ftogot
oK’
s
house.
“
I’
mleav
ingbabyj
ustor
deri
n”
“
Arey
oucomi
ngback?
”
“
Whyar
eyouaski
ng,
youwantbr
ing
Lwandl
elwenkosi
her
einmyhouse”
“
Nomama,
Iwasj
ustaski
ng”
“
Ofcour
seIwi
l
lcomeback”
“
Mmmhokay
..
.behav
eyour
sel
fpl
ease”
“
Yout
alkasi
fIdon’
tbehav
e”
“
Judgi
ngwhatLwandl
elwenkosi
tel
l
sme
aboutuncl
eK’
smom,
shesoundsl
i
kea
pi
eceofwor
k”
“
Thenwi
shmegoodl
uck”
“
Goodl
uck”Iki
ssherandheadout
,Ki
s
al
readywai
ti
ngf
orme.
“
Mysnookums”
“
Hel
l
o”weki
ssbr
ief
lybef
oreget
ti
ng
i
nsi
det
hecaranddr
ivi
ngof
f.I
’
m
ner
vousnowandIcan’
thel
pit
.
“
Dontbener
vousshe’
sgoi
ngt
oli
key
ou”
“
Idi
dn’
tbr
ingherany
thi
ng”
“
Justr
elaxokay
”Heki
ssesmyhandas
wear
ri
veathi
smom’
shouse.I
t’
sa
doubl
est
oryhouse,
def
ini
tel
ybi
gger
t
hanK’
shouse.Emi
hler
unst
oust
he
momentwewal
kin
“
Aunt
yBonga!
”
“
Heybaby
,howar
eyou”Isqueez
eheri
n
myar
msbef
oreki
ssi
ngherf
orehead
“
I’
m goody
ou?
”
“
I’
m al
sogood”
“
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul”
“
Thanky
ousweet
hear
tyout
oo”
“
Daddysai
dyout
woar
eget
ti
ngmar
ri
ed,
t
echni
cal
l
yyougoi
ngt
obemymom so
canIcal
lyoumommyal
ready
?”Il
ookat
Kwhohasasmi
l
eonhi
sface
“
Uhm y
es”shef
lashesherbeaut
if
ul
smi
l
e
“
ComeMommy
,gogoi
sreadywi
th
di
nner
”
“
IthoughtIhear
dvo….
”Thati
sK’
s
mot
her
,shel
ooksatmewi
thaf
rown
“
Iknowy
ou?
”
“
Notr
eal
l
ybutwemetwhenKhuz
ani
wasshoti
nCapeTown”
“
Ohy
ouar
eZo’
sfr
iendr
ight
?”Inod
“
Mom t
hisi
sBonga,
myf
iancéesoont
o
bemywi
fe.
..
myj
aant
hisi
smymom”
“
SawubonaMa”Ibowdownal
i
ttl
e,don’
t
l
ookatmel
i
ket
hatngi
zamauscor
aama
poi
nt.
“
Ipr
efer
redsomeoney
oungert
hanher
Khuz
ani
,wi
l
lsheev
enbeabl
etogi
ve
y
ouanhei
r”
“
Mom pl
easedon’
tst
art
”
“
Uphi
lomuny
eowudoket
ela
oway
ekhonanay
eeKapamuhl
eyena
f
uthi
usasesmncane”(
wher
e’st
heot
her
onet
hati
sadoct
orandwasal
sot
her
e
atCapeTown.She’
sbeaut
if
uland
y
oung)ohl
ordi
t’
sseemsl
i
keI
’
m goi
ng
t
ohav
eal
ongni
ght
!

Ev
erwi
shedt
her
ewasabut
tont
opr
ess
andwi
peawayev
erysi
ngl
eunpl
easant
memor
yiny
ourmi
nd,
cleanev
ery
hor
ri
blememor
yandl
eav
eonl
ythe
goodonesbutheyt
hatj
ustawi
shf
ul
t
hinki
ng.Mymi
ndcan’
tst
opdar
ti
ng
backt
othatcocksucki
ngev
ent
.Ican
st
il
lsmel
lhi
speeandIcanst
il
ltast
ehi
s
semeni
nmymout
h.Iwi
shIcanf
orget
abouti
tandmov
eonwi
thmyl
i
febuti
t’
s
pr
ovi
ngt
obeami
ssi
on,
Iev
enhav
e
ni
ght
mar
esaboutt
hatni
ght
.DoIr
egr
et
doi
ngi
t?NOIdon’
tregr
etsav
ingmy
dol
l
face,
ifIwer
etodoi
tagai
ntosav
e
her
,Iwoul
ddosowi
thouthesi
tat
ion.I
l
ovet
hatwomansomuch,
Iwoul
ddi
e,
ki
l
landsuckacockt
osav
eher
.She’
s
myl
i
fe,
Iwi
shshecanr
eal
i
zehowmuch
Il
oveherandgi
vemeachance.

I
’
m wokenupbywetki
ssesal
lov
ermy
f
aceandsweetgi
ggl
esf
rom my
af
ter
noonnap.SeasononeofI
sif
ungo
endedbutnowwear
ebusywi
thseason
t
wo.Ihav
en’
tbeensl
eepi
ngt
hesepast2
day
sbecausewewer
eshoot
ingni
ght
scenes.I
’
m gl
adt
oni
ghtIhav
enoshoot
butaguycan’
thav
epeacef
ull
ysl
eep
whenangel
facei
sar
ound.Ohboy
,thi
s
gi
rldoesn’
tli
ket
oseemesl
eepi
ngwhen
she’
sawake.I
’
m sur
eithasn’
tbeenan
hoursi
nceIdoz
edof
fbutshe’
swaki
ng
meup.

“
Daddywakeup!
”Idon’
tknowwhyshe
hast
oscr
eam whenshet
alks.
“
Aymaaanangel
face!
”
“
Imi
ssy
oudaddy
!”Ibl
i
nkmyey
esopen
andl
ookathershesmi
l
essweet
ly.
She’
stheonl
ythi
ngt
hatkeptmesane
t
hesepast3day
s.
“
Uyahl
upha,
youknowt
hat
?”Shegi
ggl
es
andnest
leherheadonmychest
.Iwr
ap
myar
msar
oundhert
inybodyi
nhal
eher
sweetscent
.Il
ovemydaught
erso
much,
ever
yti
meIl
ookather
,If
eel
pr
oudofmy
sel
f.I
thur
tst
hatIl
ostso
muchonherl
i
febutI
’
m goi
ngt
omakei
t
upf
ort
hel
ostt
ime.
“
YazDaddyuy
aphaphauSno
makukhonaumngani
wakhe”Il
augh
“
Ngoba”
“
Wewer
ewat
chi
ngcar
toonst
henher
f
ri
endar
ri
ved,
shechangedt
hechannel
t
oav
elybooool
i
ngmov
ie”(
ver
ybor
ing
mov
ie)Igi
ggl
e
“
Uyaphaphangempel
ayaz
...
I’
m hungr
y
l
et’
sgomakesomet
hingt
oeat
”Igetup
wi
thheri
nmyar
msandwal
ktot
he
ki
tchen.Ipl
aceheront
hecount
ert
abl
e
andmakesomet
hingt
oeatwhi
l
e
l
i
steni
ngt
oherbl
abbi
ng.Kamar
ia
doesn’
trunoft
hingst
osayIt
ell
you,
shef
ini
shesmewhenshet
alksSwahi
l
i
kuv
elekudumeupot
iyanel
aki
mi.
“
Gogoz
iungi
phat
hel
eini
!”Shescr
eams
assheseesmom wal
kin.
“
AwkodwaKamar
ia,
nohel
l
oGogoz
i,
howar
eyou”mom say
sassheputher
pl
ast
icbagsont
hecount
er.
“
Hel
l
oGogoz
i,howar
eyou”shemi
mic
mom’
svoi
cewel
augh
“
Usi
l
ewenanganeany
wayIbr
oughty
ou
chocol
ate”shet
akesoutchocol
atef
rom
oneoft
hepl
ast
icbagsshewascar
ryi
ng
andgi
vesi
ttoher
“
Thanky
ouGogoz
i!
”Shesqueal
s
ex
cit
edl
y
“
Didy
ouseewhatt
imei
tisnow?
”She
t
wit
chesherwr
istandl
ookatt
het
ime
“
Ooops”
“
She’
sanener
get
icchi
l
dasi
tisandy
ou
hav
etogi
veherchocol
atenow”
“
Angekengi
hluphedaddy
”mom andI
l
augh
“
Kant
iuy
azi
nokut
hiuy
ahl
uphankabi
”
“
Sitdown,
Iwi
l
lfi
xyousomet
hingt
oeat
”
Ismi
l
eandsi
tdown.I
’
m superbl
essed
t
ohav
ethi
swomani
nmyl
i
fe.
“
Thanky
oumom”
“
Youar
ewel
come.
..
youknowt
hatI
’
m
her
efory
our
ight
”shesay
swashi
ngher
hands.
“
YesMama,
Iknow”
“
Youhav
en’
tbeeny
our
sel
fev
ersi
nce
t
hatni
ghty
ousav
edMi
ra.If
eel
li
ke
t
her
e’ssomet
hingy
ouar
enott
ell
i
ngme
andBongaf
eel
sthatwayt
oo”
“
Ahhmanj
ebeni
phuz
ait
iyeni
dlanama
sconesngami
”(y
ouwer
egossi
ping
aboutme)
“
Eywenanguny
okongi
yakz
ala
ungal
i
ngenj
eukhul
umenami
kanj
alo”
(
Hey
,I’
myourmot
her
,Igav
ebi
rt
htoy
ou,
don’
tyoudar
etal
ktomel
i
ket
hat
)Isi
gh
“
I’
m sor
rybutI
’
mfi
ne”
“
Sospeakup”
“
Isai
dI’
mfi
nemom”canshest
op
naggi
ngIwon’
ttel
lher
,Iwon’
ttel
l
any
onef
ort
hatmat
ter
.Iwi
shDol
l
face
wi
l
lrespectt
hatt
oo.Speaki
ngof
Dol
l
faceIhav
ebeenav
oidi
nghert
hese
past3day
sbecauseshedon’
twantt
o
l
ett
hisgo.Tal
ki
ngabouti
twon’
tchange
any
thi
ng.Shel
ooksatmeandIknow
t
hatl
ookofher
sthi
swomanwor
ri
esa
l
otaboutmeandi
t’
snotni
ce.
“
Mom pl
easest
opwor
ryi
ng,
I’
m okay
y
ouknowy
ouar
ethef
ir
stper
sonI
conf
idei
nwhenev
ert
her
e’ssomet
hing
goi
ngon”
“
IknowbabyI
’
myourmom andI
’
m
al
l
owedt
obewor
ri
edabouty
ou”
“
Wel
lst
opwor
ryi
ng,
I’
m okay
”shegi
ves
mesandwi
chandj
uice.
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Youruncl
eisget
ti
ngmar
ri
ed,
Ican’
t
wai
t!
”Shebeams
“
Woahmama,
thi
sismom Bonga’
s
weddi
ngnoty
our
s”
“
Kant
iwhatdi
dIsay
?”
“
Iknowy
ouphel
a,y
ouwantt
ohi
j
ack
ev
ery
thi
ng.
”
“
Shewant
sani
nti
mat
eweddi
ng
cabanga”Shesay
sdr
amat
ical
l
y
“
It
’sherweddi
ng,
letherbe!
”
“
Aisukauy
abhor
anawe!
”Shehi
tswi
th
meadi
shcl
othandIl
augh.Mom l
i
kes
hi
j
acki
ngpeopl
e’
sev
ent
sandmaki
ng
t
hem her
s.Mi
ra’
swel
comepar
tywas
supposedt
obesomet
hingi
nti
mat
ebut
no,
maNkosi
organi
zedal
lthedj
,st
ret
ch
t
entandev
ery
thi
ng.Ri
ghtnowIf
eel
sor
ryf
ormom Bongabecauseshewon’
t
hav
easayi
nherownweddi
ng.WhenI
f
ini
sheat
ingIhel
pmymom wi
th
cooki
ngwhi
l
eshe’
sonandonaboutt
he
i
deasonmom Bonga’
sweddi
ng.
Kamar
iahasj
oinedSnoandherf
ri
end.
“
Munt
uzawami
”Dadsay
sashewal
ks
i
nandmymom i
sabl
ushi
ngmess
“
Real
l
ynow,
theonl
yper
sony
ouseei
s
y
ourmunt
uza”
.Theybot
hlaughbef
ore
ki
ssi
ngeachot
herokaynowt
hat
’smy
cue.Iwal
kout
,justt
otakeawal
kand
r
elaxmymi
ndbutIbumpi
ntoTshepoat
t
hegat
e.
“
Mtsheposz
ishani
boy
”(what
’sup)we
bumpf
ist
s
“
Ngi
grandwena”(
I’
m okayy
ou)
“
Kuz
ophol
aboykuz
ophol
a”(
itwi
l
lbe
okay
)
“
Ihav
esomet
hingt
oshowy
ou”
“
Okaywher
e’si
t?”
“
Youwi
l
lseej
ustagr
eet
haty
ouwi
l
l
comewi
thme”
“
Ohwel
lsi
mel
eni
”(whatar
ewewai
ti
ng
f
or)
“
Goandwearsomet
hingdecent
”Il
ook
atmy
sel
f,I
’
minsweatpant
s,sweat
er
andsneaker
s
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thmycl
othes?
”
“
Yaznawesoz
engi
kbhay
zisent
wana”I
l
ookathi
m andshakemyheadbef
ore
ski
ppi
ngi
nsi
det
hehouset
ochangei
nto
aj
ean,
blackandwhi
tesi
mpl
eteewi
th
whi
tesneaker
s.Icompl
etet
hel
ookwi
th
abl
ackbl
azer
,ift
hisi
snotdecentah
wel
lwhat
ever
.It
ell
thef
olksI
’
m goi
ng
wi
thTshepobef
oreski
ppi
ngout
.Weget
i
nthecaranddr
iveof
f.West
ri
keupa
gener
alchatunt
ilwear
ri
veatKi
ng
ShakaI
nter
nat
ional
Air
por
tandI
’
m
sur
pri
sedast
owhywear
eher
e.
“
Brawhyar
eweher
e”
“
Come”wegetoutoft
hecarandhe
l
eadst
heway
.
“
Tshepomf
ethu….
”
“
Rel
axwi
l
lyouandf
oll
owme”If
oll
ow
hi
m cur
iousl
y.
“
Enj
oyboy
!”Ichuckl
easIseeher
st
andi
ngt
her
eonar
edcar
petwhi
chi
s
maki
ngapat
hwayt
oapr
ivat
ejet
.She
l
ooksbr
eaki
ngt
aki
ngi
nashor
tbl
ack
dr
esst
hati
shuggi
ngherbodygl
ori
ousl
y.
Herwei
ghthaspi
ckupi
nthesepastt
wo
mont
hsal
lmyasset
sar
ebackouton
di
spl
ay.DamnIf
eel
mydi
ckt
wit
chi
ngi
n
mybr
ief
s.Ihav
enev
ert
houghtI
’
m al
eg
guyunt
ilImether
,Mi
rahassex
ylong
beaut
if
ull
egs.Ist
ri
det
owar
dsherwi
tha
wi
l
dsmi
l
eonmyf
ace.Thewhi
ffofher
sweetscentcat
chesmebef
oreIev
en
gett
oher
,maki
ngmedi
zzyi
nan
awesomef
ucki
ngway
.
“
Eveni
ngMi
ssMt
himkhul
u”
“
Eveni
ngMrNkosi
”
“
Youar
esost
unni
ng”
“
Youar
eal
sogor
geousMrNkosi
,shal
l
we”It
akeherhandi
ntomi
neandwe
makeouri
ntot
hej
et.Igaspi
naweas
myey
esl
ayonabeaut
if
uldi
nnersetup
f
ort
wo,
ther
oses,
thecandl
es,
champagneal
lthewor
ksman!
“
Dinneronai
rneh”
“
Youdon’
tli
kei
t”shesay
swi
tha
shi
ver
ingv
oice,
shel
ooksner
vous.
“
Like?Nowoman,
Iloooov
eei
t.Damn
y
ouout
didy
our
sel
fher
eMi
ss
Mt
himkhul
u.If
eel
li
ket
het
hingsIhav
e
donef
ory
ouar
ejustnot
hing”
“
It
’snotacompet
it
ionLwenkosi
.Wel
l
I
’
m gl
ady
oul
ovei
t,any
waywel
comet
o
ourf
ir
stdat
easacoupl
e”Il
ookather
“
Youmean.
..
youar
etaki
ngmeback
r
ight
”
“
NoImeanI
’
m endi
ngt
hingswi
th
y
ou.
..
ofcour
seI
’
mtaki
ngy
ouback
mor
on!
”Webot
hgi
ggl
e
“
Yhoobabyngat
hingi
yaphupha
besengi
ngabaz
aukut
hiuz
oke
ungi
qome”(
YhoobabyIf
eel
li
keI
’
m
dr
eami
ngIwasdoubt
ingt
haty
ouwi
l
l
ev
ergi
vemeachance.
)
“
Arghasi
fIcanst
ayawayf
rom y
ou.I
mi
ssy
ou”Ican’
thel
pasmi
l
ethatt
ugs
t
hecor
ner
sofmyl
i
ps.
“
Imi
ssy
out
oost
handwasami
”Ipul
lher
cl
oset
omy
sel
fandl
ookathert
ender
ly.
She’
ssoper
fecti
nmor
eway
sthanone.
Herhaz
elbr
owney
est
hatcompl
i
ment
s
herbr
ownchocol
ateski
n,sosof
tand
f
lawl
ess.Ipushherweav
ebehi
ndher
eart
ogetacl
earv
iewofherbeaut
if
ul
f
ace.Yi
nhl
eint
okaz
iyaMt
himkhul
u
j
eal
ousdown.Sweetsi
l
encel
i
nger
s
ar
oundus,
wecanonl
yheart
hebeatof
ourhear
tst
huddi
ngi
nsy
nc,
connect
ing
magi
cal
l
y.Ibr
ushmyl
i
psagai
nsther
s
andshest
andswi
thhert
oest
oreach
myl
i
ps,
weki
sssl
owl
y,deepl
yand
passi
onat
ely
.Hert
onguecapt
uri
ngmi
ne
andsucki
ngoni
t,Il
etoutagr
oanf
rom
t
hebackofmyt
hroat
.OhhowImi
ssher
ki
sses.Wepul
lbackandIhel
phersi
t
downt
henj
oinhert
oo.Thej
ett
akeof
f
aswegetonwi
thourdi
nner
.Ipourus
champagneandwedi
neov
erwar
m
chat
terandl
aught
er.
“
Thi
sisamaz
ingbaby
,noonehasev
er
donesomet
hingsospeci
alf
orme.
”I
hav
eal
way
sbeent
heonedoi
ngal
lthi
s
i
nmypr
evi
ousr
elat
ionshi
psandi
tnev
er
uset
obot
hermebutnowhav
ing
someonewhodoest
hisf
ormemakes
mef
eel
ext
raspeci
al,
mor
ethanI
al
readyf
eel
justf
orwi
nni
ngherhear
t.
“
I’
m gl
ady
oul
i
ket
his,
Ijustwant
ed
somet
hingunusual
”
“
Per
ksofdat
ingamusi
cian,
munt
u
sedl
aamadi
nneresbhakabhakeni
”(I
’
m
hav
ingdi
nneri
nthesky
)shegi
ggl
es
“
Youl
i
kebei
ngex
tra”
“
Butser
iousbabes,
whohi
reachar
ter
pr
ivat
ejetj
ustt
ohav
edi
nner
.Youar
e
moni
edmoswoman”
“
WeeeIwi
sh,
letmej
ustsayhav
inga
st
epdadwhoknowspeopl
ehasi
ts
per
ks”
“
I’
m ov
erwhel
medbaby
,it
’ssoooper
fect
.
Thi
sist
hebestni
ghtofmyl
i
fe,
right
bel
owt
heni
ghty
ougav
emey
our
I
nnocence”shegi
ggl
es
“
Iwi
shIcansayt
hat
,thatni
ghtwas
bestf
ormeal
so,
IthoughtIwasgoi
ng
t
odi
e”Ican’
thel
pbutbur
sti
ntol
aught
er
“
Youar
eex
agger
ati
ngdol
l
face”
“
IswearLwenkosi
”
“
Butbabyy
oubeggedmet
oputi
tin”
“
Ithoughti
twasni
cephel
a,l
i
kewhen
y
ouwer
emuf
fi
ngme”shegi
ggl
es
“
Sowhenam Iget
ti
ngmyt
uckshop”we
chor
tl
e
“
Uyaphaphay
az”shesay
slaughi
ng
“
Youpr
omi
sedmebaby
”
“
Ihadt
hat50konl
ysot
hatmeansno
spaz
ashopbaba”
“
Ifeel
hor
ri
blet
haty
ounev
erhadt
o
enj
oyy
ourf
ir
stear
ningsf
rom y
our
t
alent
”
“
50ki
snotwor
thourl
i
vesLwenkosi
.I’
m
st
il
lgoi
ngt
omakeal
otofmoneyf
rom
mygi
gs.Ohandmysongr
eachedgol
d
somoneywi
l
lbecomi
ngi
n
Themoneybecomi
ngi
n”Shesi
ngst
he
l
ast2l
i
nesshaki
ngherhead.
“
Wowbabe,
I’
m pr
oudofy
ou!
”
“
Thanky
ousomuch,
ont
her
eal
though
t
hanky
ouLwandl
elwenkosi
forsav
ing
myl
i
fe.I
fitwasn’
tfory
ou,
thewor
se
coul
dhav
ehappened.Thewayy
ouj
ust
sacr
if
icedy
our
sel
ftosav
emenomat
ter
howdemeani
ngandt
raumat
izi
ngt
he
si
tuat
ionwasf
ory
ouasast
rai
ghtguy
.
Ngi
bongaangi
qedi
Mpangaz
ithawami
,I
al
way
sknewy
oul
ovemebutwhaty
ou
di
d,Goshman….
”sheswal
l
owsspi
tand
hert
ear
sfal
ldownherf
ace.
“
I’
m sor
ryt
haty
ouhadt
ogot
hroughal
l
oft
hatnoonedeser
vest
hat
.If
eel
so
hor
ri
ble”shewi
peshert
ear
s
“
Don’
tbesor
ry,
Idi
dwhatIhadt
odo
andi
fIwer
etodoi
tagai
nfory
ouIwi
l
l
dowi
thouthesi
tat
ionbaby
”It
akeher
handsi
nmi
neandki
sst
hem
“
Iwantt
okeept
hisbet
weenusokay
”
“
Youknowy
oudon’
thav
etobe
ashamed,
thesi
tuat
ionwasbey
ondy
our
cont
rol
.I’
m pr
oudofhowy
oust
oodup
f
ormeandpr
otect
edme.Iknowt
he
si
tuat
ionwast
raumat
icbutIsaw
anot
hersi
deofy
ou,
asi
det
hatIwi
l
l
al
way
sadmi
re.Youar
emyher
o”Ismi
l
e
t
hroughmygl
i
steni
ngey
es
“
Thanky
oubabybutwedon’
thav
eto
t
alkabouti
t,Ij
ustwantt
ofor
getabouti
t
pl
ease”shesi
ghsheav
il
y
“
Youknowdepr
essi
oni
sas
unex
pressedangert
urnedi
nwar
dont
he
sel
f.Iwi
l
lhat
etoseey
oucr
awl
int
othat
pl
ace,
ther
ear
efewt
hatcomesout
st
rongert
hanbef
oreorwor
sei
fyou
r
elapse.Iwoul
ddi
eLwandl
elwenkosi
ifI
wer
etol
osey
ou.Ineedy
ou,
our
daught
erneedsy
ou.
”
“
I’
m notgoi
ngt
orel
apsebaby
,Ipr
omi
se
y
ouandI
’
m notgoi
ngany
wher
e.
Ngi
zohl
ezi
ngi
khonangi
nani
”(Iwi
l
l
al
way
sbet
her
ewi
thy
out
wo)
“
Expr
essy
ourpai
noranger
,whet
heri
t’
s
di
rect
lyt
otheot
herper
son,
ort
hrough
j
ustget
ti
ngi
toutofy
oursy
stem,
I’
m
her
eyoucan’
tventt
omeany
timeorsee
someonepr
ofessi
onal
”
“
Iwi
l
lthi
nkabouti
t,t
hanky
ouf
ory
our
concer
n”
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Ilov
eyoumor
e”shegul
psdownher
champagne.
“
Wehav
enev
erdonei
tont
heai
r”she
bi
tesherl
owerl
i
p
“
Mmmhy
ouar
esonaught
yMi
ss
Mt
himkhul
u”shegi
ggl
esnaught
il
y
“
Icani
magi
nemebendov
ert
hist
abl
e
andy
ouf
ucki
ngmybr
ainsout
”shel
i
cks
herl
i
ps
“
Damni
tbaby
!”Igr
oanasmycock
gr
owshar
d.
“
Comeher
eyou,
li
tt
lenaught
ygi
rl
!”Li
ke
aspeedofl
i
ghtI
’
m onhersi
deand
dev
our
ingherl
i
psl
i
kei
t’
smyl
astmeal
.
Thet
ast
eofchampagnemakest
heki
ss
er
oti
c.If
eel
herhandswonder
ingal
l
ov
ermybodyunt
ilt
heyr
eachmybul
ge,
squeez
ingandst
roki
ngi
tthr
oughmy
j
eans.Ipul
lherupf
rom t
heseatnot
br
eaki
ngt
heki
ssandunz
ipt
hedr
ess,
sl
i
dingi
tdownt
othef
loor
.Igr
oanwi
th
desi
reasIl
ookatt
hissex
yredl
ace
l
i
nger
iet
hati
sfi
tt
ingherper
fect
lyl
i
kei
t
wasmadeonherbody
.
“
Damny
ouar
esof
ucki
ngsex
y!”
“
Youl
i
ke”shewhi
sper
swi
thasul
tr
y
v
oice
“
Ilov
eit
”Ipul
lherpr
essi
ngourbodi
es
socl
oseandsheki
ssesme,
hert
ongue
waki
ngupev
eryner
vei
nmybody
.If
eel
herf
inger
ti
psdel
vi
ngundermyt
-shi
rt
andhel
ptakeof
fmybl
azert
oget
her
wi
thmyt
ee.Herhandsar
eex
plor
ingmy
bodysl
owl
yandgent
lyf
oll
owedby
sul
tr
yki
sses.Il
etoutamoanasIf
eel
t
hewar
mthofhert
ongueswi
rl
ing
ar
oundmyer
ectmyni
ppl
ewhi
l
e
pi
nchi
ngt
heot
herwi
thherf
inger
s.The
l
astIcheckt
hiswomannoknows
not
hingaboutsexbuther
eshei
staki
ng
met
oawor
ldofecst
asy
.OhboyIspoke
f
ast
,shesi
nksont
hef
loorwi
thher
kneesandt
ryt
ounbuckl
emewhi
chi
sa
bi
tmi
ssi
onIcanseet
hatshe’
slosi
ng
herconf
idencesoIhel
pher
,Iundomy
j
eansandj
erkt
hem downt
oget
herwi
th
mybr
ief
s.Mycr
otchspr
ingf
reel
y
pul
sat
ingandl
eaki
ngpr
e-cum.It
akeher
handandputi
tonmydi
ckt
hef
eel
of
herwar
m handar
oundmydi
cksends
goosebumpst
hroughmybodyandI
r
eleaseawi
nceofpl
easur
e
“
Shl
l
ll
hhh”shest
rokesmycr
otchsl
owl
y
andgent
lyIf
eel
suddenofheatt
hat
makesmedi
zzy
,sher
ubshert
humb
acr
osst
het
ip.Ohdamni
tsf
eel
ssooo
goodshedar
thert
ongueoutandsuck
t
heheadofmycock,
swi
rl
ingar
oundt
he
t
ipofmycockbef
orepoppi
ngoutf
ora
second.Ipul
lherweav
eawayonher
f
acet
olookatherasshet
akesmydi
ck
backi
nhermout
h,sl
owl
yswal
l
owi
ng
myhar
dlengt
hinchbyi
nch,
adeep
gr
owl
escapemyl
i
ps
“
Ohshi
i
tttbabyt
hat
’ssodamngood!
!”
Shesucksonmycockhar
d,l
i
keherl
i
fe
dependsoni
t.Damnf
oraf
ir
stt
ime
cocksucker
,she’
ssooogood!Il
etout
t
housandsofi
nhumansoundsandt
hey
ar
eur
gingheron,
she’
sal
ter
nat
ingon
deepsucksandswi
rl
ingl
i
cks.I
’
mtr
ying
sohar
dtokeepmykneesf
rom shaki
ng.
“
Ohmydol
l
face,
that
’si
tyessohbaby
shi
t!
!”
Shej
erksmyl
engt
hupanddownwi
th
herandwhi
l
esucki
ngwi
thnonst
op
pr
essur
e.FuckI
’
m goi
ngt
ocum t
onow!
It
ight
enmygr
iponherheadasIf
eel
my
di
ckspasm i
nhermout
h.
“
BabyI
’
m goi
ngt
ocum!
”Ir
oarl
i
kean
ani
mal
“
Noty
ett
heni
ghti
sst
il
ll
ong”OhIl
ove
t
hissi
deofheri
t’
sfuel
l
ingmeupIpul
l
herupandki
ssher
,li
cki
ngmywayi
n
andsucki
nghert
ongueasIgent
lypl
ace
heront
heseat
.Ispr
eadherl
egswi
de
ex
posi
nghergl
i
steni
ngwetcunt
,so
beaut
if
ulandsmoot
h.Ist
uffmyhead
hert
highsandi
nhal
ehermusky
womanhoodscent
,sher
eleasel
oud
scr
eamsofpl
easur
easIl
i
ckonherwet
sl
i
t,dr
awi
ngl
ett
erOwi
thmyt
ongue
ov
erandov
erbef
oredi
ggi
ngmyt
ongue
i
nhercunt
.
“
Babbbymaaanohy
eeeahhh!
”Ipl
unge
myt
onguedeeperi
ntohert
hencur
li
ngi
t,
herbodyconv
ulseswi
thpl
easur
easshe
r
eachanex
plosi
veor
gasm t
hatl
eav
es
herpai
nti
ng.Il
i
ckher
,lappi
ngupal
lher
j
uicest
henr
ubmydi
ckonherwet
ent
rance.
“
Ther
ubber
sar
einmycl
utchbag”she
say
swi
thast
rai
nvoi
ce
“
Iwanty
ouskoonbabypl
ease”Ient
er
hersl
owl
ybef
oreshepr
otest
ed.She
gaspsof
tl
yIl
eanov
erandwhi
speron
herear
“
Iwi
l
lpul
loutIpr
omi
sey
ou.Don’
tyou
t
rustme?
”
“
Itr
usty
ou”Igi
veherasul
tr
yki
ssasI
st
artt
hrust
ingi
nandoutofher
.Two
mont
hsofwai
ti
ngwaswor
thi
t.Ipul
lup
andl
ookatherpussywal
l
scl
enchi
ngon
mydi
ckasIpoundi
ntoherhar
d.
“
AhhhLwenkosi
ohy
essbaby
!”Her
moansar
edr
ivi
ngmecr
azy
.It
ight
enmy
gr
iponhert
highs,
diggi
ngmyf
inger
nai
l
s
I
’
m sur
etomor
rowshewi
l
lhav
emar
ks.
“
IswearbabyIhav
enev
erhadagood
pussyl
i
key
our
sohhhhshi
i
t”i
t’
str
ueI
swear
,
“
Ilov
eyourdi
ckbabyi
t’
ssooogood
ohhh!
”Ipul
lherupi
ntomyar
mswi
thout
pul
l
ingout
,reposi
ti
oni
ngmeont
heseat
wi
thmybut
tandherst
raddl
i
ngmydi
ck
herl
egsonmyshoul
der
sandar
ms
ar
oundhert
osuppor
ther
.
“
OhhbabyIl
ovey
ousomuch,
ungi
vul
ela
kamnandi
!”Ir
aspf
ier
cel
y
“
Itol
dyouey
akhoy
onke!
”
“
OhIwi
l
lfi
ghtf
ori
tbaby
,it
’ssooogood”
Iki
ssherl
i
psandgetupt
henputher
downbef
oret
urni
ngherar
ound.She
ar
chherbackabi
tandIpl
ungei
ntoher
pussywi
thonepushcausi
nghert
o
scr
eam.Themov
ementofourbodi
es
t
hrustbyt
hrust,
thesoundofourf
lesh
hi
tt
ingagai
nsteachot
her
,thewar
mthof
herski
nagai
nstmi
ne,
hermoanswi
th
t
oget
herwi
thmygr
oans,
oursoul
s
i
nter
twi
ningandmi
ndsconnect
ingi
na
deeperl
evel
ohboyev
ery
thi
ngi
sso
magi
cal
l
yper
fect
.
It
ight
enmygr
iponherneckandchock
herwhi
l
ebi
ti
ngherear
lobe,
herpussy
cl
enchesar
oundmydi
ck.she’
scl
oseI
poundherhar
der
,If
eel
herbody
st
if
feni
ngasshel
etagr
uffscr
eam and
ex
plodeIf
oll
owedaf
terhar
dsev
eral
t
hrust
s.I
fthi
sisn’
tthemostbeaut
if
ul
ni
ghtofmyl
i
fet
henIdon’
tknow.
CHAPTER60(
unedi
tedsnack-
nyana)
“
I’
m noty
oursexsl
aveasshol
esend
t
hatdr
iverback!
”Isendt
hemessage
back.Iwi
pemyt
ear
sandmakemyway
upst
air
s.Myhusbandi
sst
il
lhav
inghi
s
af
ter
noonnap.Isi
tont
hebedandl
ook
athi
m sl
eepi
ngpeacef
ull
y.Sucha
gor
geousmanhei
s.Idon’
tknowwhatI
woul
ddoi
fIl
osehi
m.Ineedt
oendt
his
nonsenseonceandf
oral
l
.Hewi
l
lbe
angr
yorev
enaskf
ordi
vor
cebutIknow
t
hatsi
nceI
’
m car
ryi
nghi
spr
eci
ous
babi
eshewon’
tthr
owmeouti
nthe
st
reet
.
“
Baby
”Ishakehi
m andheopenshi
s
ey
esandl
ooksatme.Ial
l
owmyt
ear
s
t
ofal
ldownmyf
ace
“
Heybaby
”Hepul
l
smet
ohi
schest
“
Idon’
twantt
olosey
oubaby
”
“
Youwon’
tlosemest
handwasam.I
don’
tcar
ethaty
ourf
atherdi
dn’
tal
l
ow
ust
opayl
obol
a.Youar
est
il
lmywi
fe
andIl
ovey
ousomucht
hatwi
l
lnev
er
change”
“
ButIdon’
tdeser
vey
ou”
“
Nonsense.Youar
eper
fectf
orme,
the
onl
yoneIwanti
nmyl
i
fe”
“
I’
m ahor
ri
blewi
fe”
“
Gugu…”
“
Icheat
edony
ou”Ibl
urti
tout
,ther
e’s
momentofsi
l
ence.Ipul
lmyheadupt
o
l
ookathi
m.
“
Youar
esof
unny
”Hesay
slaughi
ng
“
It
’st
rueSoxIwasdr
unkandIdi
dn’
t
knowhewasy
ouruncl
eI’
mreal
l
ysor
ry”
Icr
y
“
Woahwoahmyuncl
e,whatdi
dyou
say
?”Iex
plai
ntohi
m bet
weensobsby
t
het
imeIf
ini
shshei
spaci
ngupand
downourbedr
oom.
“
BabyI
’
m sor
ry!
”
“
Howcoul
dyoudot
hist
omeGugu!
!!
”
“
Ngi
yax
o….
”
“
Whoi
sthef
atheroft
het
winsi
sithi
m!!
”
“
Noi
tcan’
tbehi
mI’
m 7weekspr
egnant
Sox
.Ift
heywer
ehi
sIwoul
dhav
ebeen
mor
ethent
womont
hspr
egnant
”
“
BabyI
’
m sor
ry”It
ryt
ohol
dhi
m buthe
y
anksmeof
f
“
Fort
wof
ucki
ngmont
hsy
oumademea
f
ool
Gugu!Whatpi
ssedmeof
fist
hat
he’
snotast
rangerbutmyuncl
e!Wer
e
y
ougoi
ngt
osl
eepwi
thhi
mtoshuthi
m
up?
”
“
Ofcour
senotIwant
edt
otel
lyou
my
sel
fst
handwasami
”
“
Youdi
sgustme!
!”Ihav
enev
erseenhi
m
t
hisangr
y.
“
Baby
”It
ouchhi
m buthepushesmeof
f
“
Don’
ttouchme!
!!
”If
all
ont
hef
loorand
cr
ymyl
ungsoutashewal
ksout
.

Idon’
tthi
nkt
hisguyunder
standmy
phobi
aoff
all
i
ngpr
egnantagai
n.I
t
rust
edhi
m whenhesai
dhewi
l
lpul
lout
buthedi
dn’
t.Whatwassupposedt
obe
ourper
fectni
ghtendedupmehav
inga
pani
cat
tack.
“
I’
m sor
rybabyI
’
mreal
l
ysor
ry”Wear
e
att
hehot
elr
oom ofwhi
chIhadbooked
t
ospendt
heni
ghtaf
terourdi
nner
.I’
m
weepi
ngsi
l
ent
lyagai
nsthi
sbar
echest
andhi
scomf
ort
ingme.
“
Itol
dyoubabyt
hatIdon’
twantt
oev
er
f
all
pregnantagai
nwhydi
dyoudot
hat
”
“
I’
m sor
ryi
twast
ool
atef
ormet
opul
l
out
”
“
Itr
ust
edy
ouLwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Iknowmydol
l
faceandI
’
mreal
l
ysor
ry
pl
easef
orgi
veme.Ipr
omi
set
omor
row
wear
eget
ti
ngt
hatmor
ningaf
terokay
”
I
t’
sbeen3day
ssi
nceev
ery
thi
ng
happened.Lwenkosi
wasav
oidi
ngme
andIcoul
dn’
tst
andi
t.Ideci
dedt
odo
somet
hingf
orhi
mjustt
oshowhow
gr
atef
ulIam f
orsav
ingmyl
i
fe.That
ni
ghtIsawasi
deofhi
mthatIr
eal
l
y
admi
re,
asi
det
hatpr
ovedt
omet
hat
t
hisguyr
eal
l
ylov
esmeandhewoul
ddo
any
thi
ngt
opr
otectme.I
’
dbeaf
ool
to
l
ethi
m go,
it’
srar
etof
indaguywho
candoany
thi
ngf
ory
ouev
eni
t’
smeans
sacr
if
ici
nghi
msel
f.Honest
lyspeaki
ng
t
her
ear
efewguy
swhowoul
dgof
ora
gi
rll
i
keme,
Imeanabl
i
ndgi
rl
.Thi
sis
oneoft
her
easonswhyIl
ovehi
m,he
l
ovesmebey
ondmydi
sabi
l
ity
.Hel
oves
meuncondi
ti
onal
l
yandmakesmef
eel
l
i
keI
’
mthemosti
mpor
tantgi
rli
nthe
wor
ld.Iwonderi
fIam enoughf
orhi
m?
I
fImakehi
mfeel
thewayIf
eel
?If
eel
l
i
kehedeser
vesmor
ethenwhatIcan
of
ferhi
m.TodayIspentmydayont
he
i
nter
netandmaki
ngt
hisni
ght
successf
ul.Uncl
eKcamet
hroughf
or
meandI
’
m gl
adwear
ewor
kingonour
r
elat
ionshi
p.Lwenkosi
li
kedev
ery
thi
ng
GoshIwassoner
vouswhenIwent
downonhi
m,st
ruggl
i
ngt
ounbuckl
ehi
s
pant
sal
mostki
l
ledmyconf
idence.I
wasl
i
kei
fIcan’
tdosomet
hingsi
mpl
e
asunbuckl
i
nghi
spant
showcanIgi
ve
hi
mtheheadbuthenot
icedandhel
ped
me.I
t’
sonl
ytookf
ewst
rokesandI
hear
dhi
m maki
ngt
her
ightnoi
se,
that
wasenoughf
ormyconf
idencet
ocome
back.Inev
ert
houghtsucki
ngadi
cki
s
t
hatpl
easur
abl
e,honest
lyspeaki
ngsex
i
sgr
ossbuti
t’
sthemostamaz
ingt
hing
ev
er.I
’
m gl
adt
hatheenj
oyedi
tandI
hopeI
thel
pedabi
ttoer
aset
hathor
ri
ble
encount
er.Thenex
tmor
ningI
’
m woken
upbyhi
ski
ssesal
lov
ermyf
ace
“
Mor
ningmydol
l
face”
“
Mor
ningmycuddl
escakeshowar
e
y
ou”
“
I’
m okayandy
our
sel
f”
“
I’
m al
sof
inewhatt
imei
snow?
”
“
It
’spast8”
“
YhoobabesIhav
easessi
onwi
thmy
psy
chol
ogi
sti
n30mi
nuet
s”
“
Don’
twor
ryt
hedr
iverwi
l
ltakeust
her
e
l
et’
sgetcl
eanedupqui
ckl
y!
”Hescoops
meupandwal
kswi
thmet
othe
bat
hroom wher
ewet
akeaqui
ckshower
t
oget
her
.Oncewear
edoneIt
akemy
newmuf
fi
nandweheadout
.Wel
lIhad
t
obuyanewcanesi
nceRockywas
ki
l
led.Ir
eal
l
ymi
ssedhi
m sobadandmy
hear
tisbr
oken,
hemadet
hingseasyf
or
met
henacane.Mom want
stogetmea
newdogbuti
t’
sapr
ocessandIdon’
t
t
hinkIwantt
obondwi
thanot
herdog
agai
n.I
’
m gr
iev
ingRockymay
beast
ime
goesonIwi
l
lgetone.Ihav
einf
ormed
mybossesaboutt
hesi
tuat
ionathand
andt
heysy
mpat
hiz
ewi
thmeandt
old
met
otakemyt
imebutIhav
edeci
ded
t
hatIwon’
tlett
hisbr
eakme.Assoonas
If
indanapar
tmentt
hatwoul
dbe
sui
tabl
eformet
hatsi
deI
’
mleav
ing.Lee
i
shandl
i
ngt
hatf
ormesoI
’
m wai
ti
ngf
or
t
hef
eedback.I
twasr
eal
l
yni
cest
ayi
ng
att
heQwabe’
sunt
ily
eah.
..I
’
m gl
adIwi
l
l
hav
emyownspacef
oroncei
nmyl
i
fe
butmom i
snothappyatal
lthatIwi
l
lbe
st
ayi
ngal
one.Shet
hinksIwon’
tcope
al
onebutIdon’
tagr
eewi
thherI
’
m no
l
ongerat
eenagershej
ustneedl
etme
gr
owandbei
ndependent
.
“
Iwi
l
lst
ayher
eandwai
tfory
ou”
“
Iwanty
out
ocomewi
thmet
oday
”
“
Arey
ousur
e?”
“
Yes”Heki
ssesmycheekandt
akemy
handasweheadt
oMsJonesof
fi
ce.
“
Mor
ningMi
ra”shehugsme
“
Mor
ningMsJones”She’
sver
yfr
iendl
y
andIl
i
keher
.
“
Iseey
oubr
oughty
ourboy
fri
endt
oday
”
“
Yes”
“
Mor
ningMsJones”
“
Mor
ningManqoba”Manqobai
shi
s
char
act
ernamei
nIsi
fungo.
Unf
ort
unat
elyt
her
e’snoaudi
o
descr
ipt
ionofI
sif
ungo.Iwoul
dhav
e
r
eal
l
yli
kedt
osuppor
tmycuddl
ecakes
andwat
chhi
m.
“
Mor
ningMsJones”
“
Takeaseatpl
ease”wesi
tdownont
he
comf
ort
abl
eleat
hercouch.
“
Howar
eyout
oday
”
“
I’
mfi
neIguess”
“
Youguess?
”
“
Ihav
en’
thadpani
cat
tacksi
ntwo
mont
hsunt
ily
est
erday
”
“
It
’sunder
standabl
eaf
tert
het
rauma
y
ouhadi
nthesepastf
ewday
s”Ihav
e
beenat
tendi
ngsessi
onsi
nthese3day
s.
“
Buti
twasn’
tact
ual
l
yaboutwhat
happened”
“
Expl
aint
ome”It
ell
herwhathappened.
If
eel
freear
oundt
hiswoman,
shej
ust
makesi
teasyf
ormet
oopenupt
oher
wi
thoutaf
earofbei
ngj
udgedor
mockedat
.
“
Itr
ust
edhi
m MsJonesbuthedi
dn’
t
pul
lout
”
“
Manqobawhydi
dyoudot
hataf
ter
pr
omi
singt
opul
lout
”
“
Itwasal
readyt
ool
ateMsJones.I
coul
dn’
tcont
rol
mysel
f.
”
“
Youdor
eal
i
zet
haty
oubr
okehert
rust
ony
ou”
“
YesandI
’
mreal
l
ysor
ry”Hesay
s
“
Hav
eyout
woev
ersi
tdownandt
alk
abouty
oursexl
i
fe”
“
Notr
eal
l
ybutheknowst
hatIdon’
t
wantt
ofal
lpr
egnantagai
nhenceI
al
way
swantust
ousepr
otect
ionbut
Lwandl
elwenkosi
doesn’
tli
kecondom.
Ev
eny
est
erdayIbr
oughtt
hem buthe
r
efusedt
ousedi
tandsai
dhewi
l
lpul
l
outbecauseIt
rust
edhi
m Iagr
eed”
“
Yout
woneedt
osi
tdownandt
alk
abouty
oursexl
i
fenotunl
essi
f
Manqobahav
enopr
obl
em t
ovoi
ceout
hi
ssi
denow”
“
Idon’
tmi
ndMsJones.Ir
eal
l
ydon’
tli
ke
maki
ngl
ovet
oherwi
thar
ubber
.I’
m
awar
ethatpr
otect
iondoesn’
tpr
event
pr
egnancyonl
ybutdi
seasest
oobutI
bel
i
evet
hatsl
eepi
ngwi
thmor
ethenone
per
soni
swhatl
eadst
osex
ual
diseases.
I
’
m commi
tt
edt
ohersoi
sshet
ome”
“
Whataboutt
hepr
egnancy
?Mi
rai
snot
r
eadyt
ohav
eachi
l
dandy
ouf
ail
edt
o
pul
louthowcanshet
rustt
haty
ouwi
l
l
pul
loutnex
tti
me?
”
“
Ithi
nkwehav
etot
ryanot
hermet
hod,
bi
rt
hcont
rol
may
be”
“
Nonot
heyar
enot100%accur
ate”Isay
“
Soi
sthecondom baby
”
“
Thebur
sti
ngofacondom i
sar
are
occur
renceLwenkosi
andi
fit
’shappens
y
ouwi
l
ltel
lmet
henIwi
l
lgetmor
ning
af
ter
.”
“
Butbaby
…”
“
Hay
iLwandl
elwenkosi
Idon’
twantt
o
f
all
pregnantev
eragai
nawuz
way
in!
”
“
Youneedt
ocal
m downMi
ra”It
akea
hugeabr
eat
h
“
Mir
ayouar
enotr
eadyt
ohav
eachi
l
d
nowory
oudon’
twantt
ohav
eachi
l
d
ev
eragai
n”
“
Idon’
twantt
ohav
eachi
l
dev
eragai
n
MsJones”
“
Whyi
fImayask”
“
I’
m scar
edokay
,Ican’
tgot
hrought
hat
agai
n.Myf
ir
stpr
egnancywasa
ni
ght
mar
eanddepr
essi
ng.Thepai
nof
wonder
inghowy
ouwi
l
ltakecar
eof
y
ourchi
l
dwhi
l
eyouneedt
obet
aken
car
eofaswel
l
.Asmuchas
Lwandl
elwenkosi
losty
ear
sofour
daught
er’
sli
feIal
sodi
dev
ent
houghI
wast
her
ebutIcoul
dn’
ttakecar
eofher
.
I
….”Ibur
sti
ntot
ear
s.Lwenkosi
pul
l
sme
t
oherar
ms
“
Shhhdon’
tcr
ymyl
oveI
’
mreal
l
ysor
ry”
“
Her
e’swat
erbabygi
rl
”Say
sMsJonesI
t
aket
hegl
assofwat
erandgul
pitdown
t
hengi
vei
ttoher
.
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Youar
ewel
comemydear
..
.y
ouhav
e
Tokophobi
a”
“
Toko-
what
?”Iask
“
Phobi
aoff
all
i
ngpr
egnantandgi
vi
ng
bi
rt
h.I
t’
sver
ycommonf
orwoment
o
f
eel
anx
iousaboutpr
egnancyandbi
rt
h.
Tokophobi
acanbespl
i
tint
otwot
ypes,
pr
imar
yandsecondar
y.Pr
imar
y
t
okophobi
aoccur
sinwomenwhohav
e
notgi
venbi
rt
hbef
ore.Fort
hesewomen,
af
earofbi
rt
htendst
ocomef
rom
t
raumat
icex
per
iencesi
nthei
rpast
,
i
ncl
udi
ngsex
ual
abuse.I
tcanal
sobe
l
i
nkedt
owi
tnessi
ngadi
ff
icul
tbi
rt
hor
l
i
steni
ngt
ost
ori
esorwat
chi
ng
pr
ogr
ammeswhi
chpor
traybi
rt
has
embar
rassi
ngordanger
ous.Wher
eas
womenwhosuf
ferf
rom secondar
y
t
okophobi
a,t
endt
ohav
ehadapr
evi
ous
t
raumat
icpr
egnancyandbi
rt
h
ex
per
iencewhi
chhasl
eftt
hem wi
tha
f
earofgi
vi
ngbi
rt
hagai
n.”
“
Sowhatcanbedoneaboutt
hist
oko
whatwhatMsJones?Pr
egnancyr
eal
l
y
f
reaksherout
”
“
It
’shel
pful
tot
alkt
hroughapr
evi
ous
ex
per
ienceofat
raumat
icpr
egnancy
andbi
rt
h.Get
ti
ngt
hesuppor
tthatshe
r
eal
l
yneed.
”
“
I’
m goi
ngt
ogi
veherf
ewt
askst
hatwi
l
l
hel
pherdeal
wit
hhert
raumaandsee
howi
t’
swor
ksout
”
“
Thanky
ouMsJones”Ther
estoft
he
sessi
ongoeswel
lthenwedr
ivet
o
phar
macyandbuymor
ningaf
terpi
l
l
bef
oregoi
ngt
owi
mpyf
orbr
eakf
ast
.

K’
smom doesn’
tli
keme,
shewas
t
hrowi
ngsni
decomment
sthr
oughout
t
hewhol
edi
nnerandbei
ngZo’
sfr
iend
di
dn’
thel
p.Whatbaf
fl
esmei
sthatmy
mom andherhav
ebeenv
erycl
ose.How
cany
oubef
ri
endswi
thmebuthat
emy
daught
er.Iwasex
pect
ingt
his
f
ort
unat
elybutwhatmakesmeangr
yis
t
hatKhuz
ani
wat
chedhi
smom t
alkt
o
mel
i
keI
’
m nohumanatal
l
.
“
Don’
ttel
lmet
ocal
m downKhuz
ani
!”
“
Snookums…”
“
Youwat
chedy
ourmom say
ingal
l
t
hosenast
ythi
ngst
ome!
”Af
terdi
nner
wedr
ovet
ohi
shouseev
ent
houghI
di
dn’
twantt
ocomeher
e.
”
Idi
dn’
tBonga.It
oldhert
obackof
f
r
emember
”
“
Butwhenshewast
alki
ngaboutanhei
r
y
ouj
ustkeptqui
et!
”
“
YazI
’
mti
redmybabyIwantt
osl
eepI
hadal
ongday
”Hemakehi
swayt
ohi
s
bedr
oom andIf
oll
owhi
m.
“
Ohsoy
ouj
ustgonnai
gnor
emewhi
l
e
I
’
mtal
ki
ngt
oyou?Yousai
dwemust
comeher
etot
alkbutnonowy
ouwant
t
osl
eep!
”
“
Youar
enott
alki
ngr
ightnowy
ouar
e
scr
eami
ngBonga”It
akeahugebr
eat
h
t
ocal
m my
sel
fdown.
“
Ithoughtwet
alkedaboutt
hehei
rand
weagr
eedbuty
oumadei
tlookl
i
keI
’
m
deny
ingy
ouachi
l
dinf
rontofy
our
mom”Isaycal
mly
“
YouknowIwantanhei
rBonga”
“
Itol
dyouwear
etoool
dforachi
l
d”I
l
ookathi
m ashet
akeshi
scl
othesof
f
pi
ecebypi
ece.
“
Yout
alkl
i
kewe’
re200y
ear
scomeon
Bonga.I
’
m st
il
lheal
thyasf
uckIcan
maket
ent
winset
s”Isi
ghandsi
nkon
t
hebed.Hecomest
omeonl
ywear
ing
hi
sbr
ief
sandkneel
downbef
oreme.
“
Iwi
l
lnev
erf
orcey
out
oany
thi
ngy
ou
don’
twantbutI
’
m notsat
isf
iedwi
thy
our
ex
cuse”
“
It
’snotanex
cuseKdon’
tyout
hinkwe
ar
eol
d”
“
Exact
lywhatadul
tsdov
ele,
theyget
mar
ri
edandmakebabi
es.I
sikhat
hi
si
yasi
vumel
a.”
“
Youar
etal
ki
ngl
i
kemymom r
ightnow”
Hepl
aceshi
shandont
hesi
deofmy
f
ace
“
LookIdon’
twantust
ofi
ght
,Ihat
eit
whenwef
ightandI
’
m notaboutt
o
makey
oudosomet
hingy
oudon’
tli
ke.
Youdon’
twantt
ohav
eachi
l
dit
’sokay
”
“
Buty
ouwanti
tandI
’
m scar
edt
haty
ou
wi
l
lwantsomeonewhocangi
vey
oua
chi
l
d”Iconf
essandbr
eat
heoutl
oudl
y.
“
Ifi
t’
snoty
out
hat
’sI
’
m hav
ingachi
l
d
wi
tht
hanIr
athernothav
eachi
l
datal
l
.I
l
ovey
ouandt
her
e’sonl
yyouwhoowns
myhear
t”Ir
ubhi
shandagai
nstmysi
de
oft
hef
aceasIl
ockmyey
esonhi
m.I
don’
tknowwhyIkeepl
eav
ingaspace
f
ordi
sappoi
ntmentbuthekeepspr
ovi
ng
mewr
ong.
“
Ilov
eyou”Hesmi
l
esbef
orel
eani
ng
cl
osert
ocapt
uremyl
i
psi
ntohi
s.
“
Let
’ssl
eep”HegetupasIdot
hesame
andundr
esswhi
l
eher
emov
est
he
pi
l
lowsont
hebed.
“
Iwantt
ocal
lMi
raandi
nfor
m hert
hat
I
’
m notcomi
ngback”
“
Youdon’
thav
eto”
“
Why
?”
“
Ial
readydi
d”
“
When?
”
“
Onourwayher
e”Isl
i
pnex
ttohi
m and
pr
essmybodyt
ohi
s,l
ayi
ngmyheadon
hi
schestashewr
apshi
sar
msar
ound
mybody
“
Ihav
ebeendi
ggi
ngi
nfoaboutShaka
andy
ouwon’
tbel
i
evehowcr
uel
that
mani
s”
“
Whatdoeshedo?
”
“
Uthwal
angamav
irgi
ns”
“
Youar
ely
ing!
”
“
I’
mtel
l
ingy
ou,
thathowhegotal
lthe
moneyhehas.Hehasany
angat
hat
he’
swor
kingwi
th.Thi
sist
heonl
yway
t
ogethi
mlockedupf
orl
i
fet
ime.
”
“
Wowt
hatcr
uel
bast
ard!Hedeser
ves
l
i
fet
imesent
encei
ndeed!
”
“
He’
scr
uel
tjoo.I
’
m gl
ad
Lwandl
elwenkosi
wasabl
etot
akeMi
ra
outoft
hathouse”
“
Met
oo.
..
Ihav
ebeent
hinki
ng”
“
Yes”
“
Iwantt
ogi
veKhany
iandherson
ev
ery
thi
ngt
hatbel
ongt
oKhumal
osoI
needt
omeether
”
“
Ever
ythi
ngasi
nev
ery
thi
ng?
”
“
Yesi
ncl
udi
ngt
hehouseshecansel
li
t
i
fshewant
”
“
Theny
’al
lwi
l
lmov
einher
ewi
thme.I
l
i
ket
hei
dea”Ichuckl
e
“
NoI
’
m goi
ngt
omov
einwi
thMi
rai
nher
apar
tmentt
hat
’sgoi
ngshe’
stobel
i
ving
i
n”Hemakesmel
ookathi
m wi
thmy
chi
n
“
InJohannesbur
g?”
“
Yes”
“
Hay
iBongawhyi
fImayask?
”
“
Iwantanewst
artK,
Iwantt
omov
eon
f
rom mypasty
ouknow.Iwantt
oget
r
idofev
ery
thi
ngt
hati
nvol
vesmypast
andst
artaf
resh”
“
Iheary
oubabyandIunder
standbutdo
y
ouhav
etogot
oJohannesbur
g”Iknew
t
hat
’st
heonl
ythi
nghe’
swor
ri
edabout
“
YesIcan’
tletmydaught
erst
ayal
one,
she’
sgoi
ngt
oneedme”
“
Mir
amdal
ast
handwasami
youwi
l
lbe
cr
owdi
ngherspacenj
e.”
“
She’
snotusedt
ost
ayal
one,
howwi
l
l
shesur
viv
eandbesi
dest
hatI
stheonl
y
pl
acev
eleengahl
alakuy
o”
“
That
’snott
ruey
oucanst
ayher
ethi
sis
y
ourhouseasmuchasi
t’
smi
ne.Iwi
l
l
mov
eoutt
hent
ogi
vey
ouguy
sspace”
“
That
’st
het
hingKhuz
ani
myl
i
fehas
beenr
evol
vi
ngar
oundKhumal
o.Idon’
t
wantt
odependonanymanany
mor
e
don’
tgetmeIl
ovey
ousomuchandI
knowy
ouwi
l
lnev
erf
ail
tot
akecar
eof
usbutIowei
ttomy
sel
ftopr
ovet
hatI
candoi
tonmyowny
ouknow.
”He
gr
oansi
nfr
ust
rat
ion
“
Pleaseal
l
owmet
omakesomet
hingof
my
sel
f”
“
Whatpl
ansdoy
ouhav
einmi
nd?
”
“
Star
tabusi
nessmay
be”
“
Buty
oucandot
hatwhi
l
eyouar
eli
vi
ng
her
e.Iwi
l
lhel
pyoust
artupany
busi
ness”
“
Iknowmyl
oveIknowbutIneedt
odo
t
hisngi
yakucel
a.Iwantt
obui
l
dmy
sel
f
andIdon’
twanty
ourhel
pespeci
all
yif
i
t’
scapi
tal
.Iwantt
odot
hisonmyown
wi
thoutany
one’
shel
p”
“
Eveni
fit
’sal
oan?
”
“
Nobutt
hanky
ou”
“
Youar
eadamantaboutt
hissoIwi
l
l
gi
vey
ouev
erysuppor
tyouneed,
know
t
hatI
’
m al
way
sher
etohel
p”
“
Thanky
ousomuch”Ipeckhi
sli
ps.I
hav
ebeendoi
ngal
otofr
esear
chev
en
t
houghIhav
en’
tdeci
dedwhatbusi
ness
doIwantt
ost
art
.Ipr
ayev
ery
thi
ngwor
k
out
.Ihav
ebeenpr
eachi
ngt
omy
daught
ert
hatIwanthert
obe
i
ndependentandsooni
t’
sti
meIsett
he
ex
ampl
eforher
.Ihav
ereal
i
zedt
hati
t’
s
nott
ool
ateasl
ongI
’
m st
il
lbr
eat
hing.
Themi
ndi
sapower
ful
thi
ngi
tcan
mi
sleadussomet
imesbutwhat
i
mpor
tanti
sthatwheny
ouhada
momentofr
eal
i
zat
ioni
stot
akeact
ion.
Asl
ongasGodhav
en’
tsai
dno.
Thenex
tmor
ningIwakeupandsl
i
pint
o
hi
sshi
rtandpushi
nsbef
oremaki
ngmy
wayt
othebat
hroom t
owashmyf
ace
andr
insemymout
h.OnceI
’
m doneI
headt
otheki
tchent
omakehi
m
br
eakf
astandt
akei
ttohi
sbedr
oom.
He’
sst
il
lsl
eepi
ngpeacef
ull
y.Ipl
acet
he
t
rayont
hebedsi
det
abl
eandwakehi
m
up
“
Wakeupy
ouar
eget
ti
ngl
atef
orwor
k”
Her
ubshi
ssl
eepyey
esandl
ooksatme
wi
thasmi
l
eonhi
sface
“
Mor
ningmyj
aan”
“
Mor
ningDaddyK,
Imadey
ou
br
eakf
ast
”
“
Yousuchandar
li
ngt
hanky
ouso
much”Hepout
shi
sli
psandIbendov
er
t
oki
sshi
m.Hesl
i
desoutoft
hebed,
hi
s
mor
ninger
ect
ionbul
gingt
hroughhi
s
br
ief
sandwal
kst
othebat
hroom.He
comesbackandhav
ehi
sbr
eakf
ast
whi
l
eIpr
epar
esomet
hingf
orhi
mto
wear
.Wet
aket
heshowert
oget
heraf
ter
hi
sbr
eakf
ast
.
“
Who’
sgoi
ngt
otakecar
eofmewhen
y
ouar
enother
e”Hesay
sasIf
ixhi
sti
e
onhi
sneck
“
Stopbei
ngacr
ybaby
”Hepul
l
sme
cl
oset
ohi
msel
fandki
ssesme.I
’
mthe
f
ir
stonet
oleav
eashehassomeemai
l
s
t
ocheckandpr
epar
ehi
msel
ffora
meet
ing.I
’
m onmywayhomewhenI
not
icear
oadbl
ock.Thesebast
ards
ekuseni
njenabaar
gh.Il
owert
he
wi
ndowdownassoonasIpul
lov
er
“
Mor
ningcanIhav
eyourl
i
censepl
ease”
l
uckyIcar
ryi
twher
everIgo.Youmi
ght
nev
erknowwheny
ouwi
l
lneedi
tev
eni
f
y
ouar
enott
rav
eli
ngwi
thy
ourcar
.
“
Her
e”Ihandi
ttoher
“
MrsKhumal
opl
easeopent
hebootI
wantt
ocheck”
“
Okay
”Theyar
ewast
ingmyt
imebut
heyt
heyar
edoi
ngt
hei
rjob.Idoasshe
sai
dandIcanseeont
her
earmi
rr
or
t
her
e’ssomet
hingi
sgoi
ngon.Igetout
oft
hecarwal
ktot
hem t
otel
lyouI
’
m
shockedt
owhatI
’
m seei
ngr
ightnow
woul
dn’
tbeanunder
stat
ement
.Ther
e’s
abodyofadeadwomani
nK’
scarboot
.
“
MrsKhumal
ocar
etoex
plai
nwhat
’s
goi
ngonher
e”
“
Nononoi
t’
snotme.
..
thecari
snot
mi
ne.
.Ihav
enoi
deahow.
.di
dthat
..
body.
.goti
n..
ther
e!”Im hy
ster
ical
l
y
“
I’
m sor
rybuty
ouwehav
etoar
rest
y
ou….
”ev
erywor
dpl
aysl
i
keasl
ow
mot
ionIf
eel
li
keIwi
l
lfai
nt.Iwantt
o
scr
eam t
hatIdi
dn’
tki
l
lher
!Idon’
tknow
what
’sgoi
ngon!Idi
dn’
tev
enknowshe
wast
her
ebutIcanseet
hati
twi
l
lbei
n
v
ain.Theycuf
fmeandshov
emei
none
oft
hev
ans.Damny
ouKhuz
ani
what
hav
eyougotmei
nto!
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayAmahl
e
Asemahl
eGi
nya&HappyBi
rt
hdayZeey
Ent
leNohaj
i

CHAPTER61

Iswal
l
owamoani
nmyt
hroatasIf
eel
hi
stounge,
sucki
ngonmycl
i
twhi
l
ehi
s
f
inger
sar
emov
ingi
nandoutofme.I
pr
obmy
sel
fupwi
thmyel
bowsj
ustt
o
gett
hev
iewofhi
m eat
ingmycooki
e.
Ourey
esmeetheshootmef
li
rt
ati
ous
smi
l
e,heknowsIl
ovewat
chi
nghi
m
eat
ingmynun.I
t’
sdoest
het
hingsI
can’
tex
pressi
nwor
dst
ome.
“
Ahhhhh”Icl
osemyey
esandt
hrowmy
headbackenj
oyi
ngt
heel
ect
ri
fyi
ng
pl
easur
eofhi
stoungeandf
inger
s
“
Ohhhy
essNkosi
wami
i
i”If
eel
my
whol
ebodyshi
ver
ingast
hemassi
ve
wav
eofpl
easur
egushesdownmyl
ower
body
,thenhest
ops.Il
ookathi
m wi
tha
deadast
areandr
eadyt
oeathi
m al
i
ve
butheshut
smeupwi
thonet
hrustI
ex
ploder
ightt
her
eandt
hen.
“
Openy
ourey
esmunt
uza”Ibl
i
nkmy
ey
esopenandgaz
eathi
sredhal
f
hoodedey
es.
“
Goodmor
ning”
“
Mor
ningmyl
ove”
“
Arey
oust
il
lmadatme”Hesmi
rksI
ev
enf
orgott
hatIwasmadathi
m!
“
Yes!
”Hemakesmewr
apmyl
egs
ar
oundhi
sneckandst
artt
hrust
ingi
n
outofmesl
owl
yanddeepl
y.
“
I’
m sor
ryst
handwasami
”
“
Uyat
handauku.
.ahhhohhhBheki
i
i”He’
s
hi
tt
ingt
her
ightspot
,Icanf
eel
himi
nmy
womb.
“
Youf
eel
me?
”
“
YesssbabyohhmyGodness”He’
s
poundi
ngme,
eyesl
ockedonmeand
I
’
m di
ggi
ngmynai
l
sont
hef
rontofhi
s
hai
ryt
highs.
“
Owwwmunt
uza!
!Shi
t!
”Ihearmyphone
r
ingi
ngwet
ryt
oignor
eitbuti
t’
s
per
sist
ent
.Hest
ret
chesov
ert
otakei
t
andgi
vei
ttome
“
Hel
l
o..
ahhh”Iey
ehi
mtost
opabi
tbut
doeshel
i
sten,
noi
t’
sli
keI
’
mfuel
i
nghi
m
“
Zo…”
”
Bongaawwwhh”
“
Icaughty
ouatbadt
imeIsee,
I’
m sor
ry
t
oint
err
upty
ou”Shesay
scr
ying
“
Bongawhat
’sgoi
ngon,
whyar
eyou
cr
ying”i
t’
sonl
ythenmyhusbandst
ops
f
ucki
ngme.
“
Ihav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
ogethol
dof
Khuz
ani
buthe’
sphonei
sof
f,he’
sint
he
meet
ing.Iwasar
rest
edZoandI
..
”I
can’
thearhershe’
scr
ying
“
Arr
est
edwhy
?!”She’
str
iest
oex
plai
n
butIcan’
tgr
aspal
ltheex
actwor
ds
ex
ceptbodyi
nmybr
other
’sbootand
r
oadbl
ock.It
ell
hert
otel
lmewher
ethey
di
dtakehert
othenhangup.
“
Ihav
etogobaby
,Bongai
sar
rest
ed”I
sayr
oll
i
ngoutofbed.
“
What
?Why
?”
“
Idon’
tknowdar
li
ngIcoul
dn’
thearher
andKhuz
ani
isunr
eachabl
e”Iski
ptot
he
bat
hroom t
ofr
eshenupqui
ckl
y
“
Pleasecal
lLwandl
elwenkosi
andt
ell
hi
mtocomeback,
Kamar
ianeedsa
baby
sit
ter
”IshoutasI
’
m busywi
thmy
hy
gienepr
ocess.
“
Idon’
tmi
ndt
aki
ngadayof
fformy
gr
anddaught
erbaby
.”Heshout
sback.I
f
ini
shandwal
ktot
hebedr
oom t
olot
ion
mybodyandgetdr
essed.
“
Thanky
oumydar
li
ng,
youwi
l
lcope
r
ight
”
“
ComeonbabyIuset
obaby
sitSno
r
emember
”
“
Ohy
es.
..Il
ovey
ou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Ipeckhi
sli
psandr
ush
out
.Idr
ivet
omybr
other
’scompanyand
t
her
ecept
ioni
stt
ell
smet
hathe’
sint
he
meet
ing.
“
Tel
lhi
mit
’samat
terofl
i
feanddeat
h”
shenodsandwal
ksaway
.Isi
tont
he
couchandwai
tforhi
mimpat
ient
ly.
Mi
nut
esl
aterhemakeshi
swayt
owar
ds
mewi
tht
her
ecept
ioni
st
“
I’
minai
mpor
tantmeet
ingZo…”Icut
hi
m of
f
“
Bongai
sar
rest
ed”
“
What
?”
“
Thepol
i
cef
oundabodyofadead
womani
nyourcar
”
“
Deadwomanwhatt
hef
..
.wai
ther
e,I
’
m
comi
ng!
”Hedi
sappear
sI’
m sur
etot
ell
whoev
ert
hathei
shav
ingameet
ing
wi
tht
hatt
her
e’sanur
gentmat
tert
hat
needhi
sat
tent
ion.Hecomesbackand
wel
eav
e,hi
m dr
ivi
ngmycar
.
“
What
’sgoi
ngonKhuz
ani
,adead
womani
nyourcarr
eal
l
y?”
“
ZoIdon’
tknowwhat
’sgoi
ngonbuti
t’
s
aset
up,
I’
mtel
l
ingy
ou!
”He’
sgr
abbi
ng
t
hest
eer
ingwheel
har
dandhi
shands
ar
epul
sing.Idon’
tthi
nkIhav
eev
erseen
hi
mthi
sfr
ust
rat
ed.
“
Don’
tki
l
lusphel
a”He’
swayt
ofast
“
Sor
ry”
“
Ithi
nki
t’
sKhosi
whosebehi
ndt
his
kodanaweKhuz
ani
outal
lwomeni
nthe
wor
ldy
ouhadt
osl
eepwi
tht
hatcr
azy
woman”
“
AyawumeZowhywoul
dKhosi
dot
his”
“
Youknownot
hingaboutt
hatwoman,
I
see.Shedoesn’
ttaker
eject
ionwel
l
uy
ahl
any
aloy
amf
azi
Ihav
ehear
dscar
y
st
ori
esabouther
.Uhambauf
akaugway
i
wakhonomaukuphi
bukamanj
e!”
“
Ify
ouhav
enot
hingt
osayshutt
hef
uck
upZol
ekanx
!”Wear
ri
veandaskt
osee
Bongal
ucki
l
ytheydon’
tgi
veus
pr
obl
ems.Wear
eleadt
oav
isi
tor
sroom
wi
thi
nsecondsofwai
ti
ngBongai
s
br
oughtt
ous.
“
Snookums!
”Heat
tempt
stohugherbut
shepusheshi
m of
fandt
hrowher
sel
fin
myar
msandcr
y
“
I’
m sosor
rysi
s”Isayr
ubbi
ngherback
“
Not
ouchi
ng!
”Say
sthepol
i
ce,
Iletgoof
herandwesi
tdown
“
BabyI
'
m sor
ry”
“
Sor
ryKhuz
ani
,i
sthatal
lyoucansay
sor
ry!I
’
mlockedupher
efory
ourmess!
”
“
Babypl
easecal
m downandl
etme
ex
plai
n..
.Idon’
tknowhowt
hatbodyofa
womangoti
nmycar
.Ihav
enoi
dea,
I’
m
notamur
der
er.Youknowmest
handwa
sami
eveni
fIdi
dki
l
lthatwoman,
I
woul
dn’
tlety
oudr
ivet
hecarknowi
ngi
t
hasabodyofadeadwoman”
“
Iknowbaby
,Iknow.
..
I’
m sor
ryi
t’
sjust
t
hatI
’
m scar
edpl
easegetmeoutof
her
e.Icansur
viv
eany
thi
ngbutnotj
ail
”
shecr
ies
“
Iwi
l
ldoany
thi
ngt
ogety
ououtofher
e
y
ezwa”Het
akesherhandki
ssesi
t.
“
PleaseI
’
m beggi
ngy
ou”
“
Igoty
ouokay
,don’
twor
ry.
..Il
ovey
ou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”
“
Timei
sup!
”Soqui
ckl
y
“
Pleasedon’
ttel
lmydaught
ert
hatI
’
m
her
e.Idon’
twantany
thi
ngt
hatwi
l
lset
herback”
“
Wewon’
t”Khuz
ani
say
s
“
Zol
ookaf
termydaught
erand
gr
anddaught
erf
ormepl
ease”
“
Iwi
l
lsi
s.”Ican’
thel
pbutbur
sti
ntoa
sobasshe’
stakenawayf
rom us.
Khuz
ani
pul
l
smei
nhi
sar
msand
comf
ort
sme.I
’
m soscar
edt
hisi
sa
ser
iouscase,
mur
der
erwhati
ftheyf
ind
hergui
l
ty?

TosayI
’
m hur
twoul
dbean
under
stat
ement
.Howcanshedot
hist
o
me?It
rust
edherwi
thev
ery
thi
ngi
nme
andwhatdi
sgustmei
sthatmyuncl
e
st
il
lwant
stof
uckmywi
fet
okeept
he
secr
et!Whatki
ndofanuncl
edoest
hat
!
Idon’
tknowwhyam Iev
ensur
pri
sed
becauseKhuboni
isawomani
zer
.I
spentani
ghtatahot
el,
dri
nki
ngmy
sor
rowsaway
.It
’st
henex
tmor
ningand
Ihav
eahor
ri
bleheadache.Idr
agmy
sel
f
outofbedandhi
tashoweronceI
’
m
doneIgetdr
essedandswi
tchmyphone
on.Tonsofmessagescomest
hroughI
knowt
hatt
heyar
eal
lcomi
ngf
rom Gugu.
Idon’
twantt
otal
ktohernorseeher
,I
needspace.Ipul
lov
eratKhuboni
’
syar
d
andst
epoutoft
hecaraf
tert
aki
ngmy
gun.Somel
adywear
inghi
sshi
rtopens
t
hedoorf
orme
“
Wher
e’sKhuboni
”
“
Int
hebedr
oom”Justt
hent
hebast
ard
wal
ksi
nonl
yhi
sbox
er.
“
Ndodana”
“
Ndodanamyf
oot
,youbast
ard!
!”
“
Ibetsheshet
oldy
ouhuh”Hesmi
rks
“
Yousuchanasshol
eyouknowt
hat
!
Youscr
ewedmywi
feandwheny
ou
f
oundoutshe’
smywi
fey
ouwantt
o
makehery
oursper
m di
shf
ory
our
si
l
ence!
”Thel
adygaspsandl
ooksat
Khuboni
“
Yousonofabi
tch!
”Shehi
tshi
m wi
th
hi
ssl
eeper
sanddi
sappear
s
“
GetoutofmyhouseMpendul
o,y
ou
cantbar
gei
nmyhouseandcause
t
roubl
ebet
weenmywomanandI
!”
“
Ohsoi
t’
sokayf
ory
out
ocauset
roubl
e
bet
weenmywi
feandI
”Thel
adycomes
backi
nherdr
essnowandheadout
“
Akusi
mfaz
iley
ant
omaan
unondi
ndwa!
”(Thati
snotawomanbut
awhor
e!)Thati
nfur
iat
esmor
eIt
akeout
mygunandpoi
ntmygunathi
m.
“
Wowagun!Youpoi
nti
ngagunatme
y
ouruncl
efort
hathoeMpendul
ohuh?
”I
pul
lthet
ri
gger
.
-

I
’
m gl
adt
hatmycuddl
ecakesandI
t
alkedandhei
sver
yunder
standi
ng
aboutmyf
earofhav
ingchi
l
drenagai
n
sowewi
l
lbeusi
ngpr
otect
ion.Ipr
eferi
t,
i
t'
ssaf
ert
henot
hermet
hods.Wewat
ch
amov
ieaf
terbr
eakf
astt
henwehead
homet
ogetmyst
uff
.Iwi
l
lbest
ayi
ng
wi
tht
hem f
orf
ewday
smymom and
uncl
eKwentonav
acat
ion.That
’swhat
mom Zosai
dont
hephone.It
ri
edt
otel
l
hert
hatIwi
l
lbef
ineathomebutshe
woul
dn’
tli
stent
ome.Ihat
ehow
ev
ery
onei
sfussi
ngov
erme.Icant
ake
car
eofmy
sel
f!Ipackev
ery
thi
ngIwi
l
l
needt
hent
hedr
ivert
akeust
o
Lwenkosi
’
shouse
“
Don’
tbemadbaby
”
“
Argwena,
youj
usthappynj
e”He
l
aughs
“
Vel
eI’
m happy
”Heki
ssesmycheek.
“
Mommy
!”Myl
i
ttl
eangel
say
sthe
momentwemakeourwayi
n
“
Baby
”Igi
veLwenkosi
mymuf
fi
nand
scoopupmydaught
erandputheron
t
hesi
deofmywai
stt
hent
akemuf
fi
n
f
rom Lwenkosi
.
“
Imi
ssy
oumommy
”Sheki
ssesmy
cheek
“
Imi
ssy
out
oobaby
”
“
Whydi
dn’
tyoucomebackl
astni
ght
daddy
,Iwant
edt
osl
eepwi
thy
ou”
“
I’
m sor
ryangel
facedaddywas
wor
king”
“
Ther
e’sameangogoi
nthel
i
vingr
oom
mama”
“
Real
l
y”
“
Yesshe’
sar
gui
ngwi
thKhul
u”Wemake
ourwayt
othel
i
vingr
oom andgr
eet
bef
oresi
tt
ingdown.Theol
dhagi
sher
e
ohGod,
myst
ayher
eisgoi
ngt
obea
ni
ght
mar
e.
“
Howar
eyougogo?
”AsksLwenkosi
“
I’
m nothappyatal
lmygr
andson,
I
cameher
etodot
hei
mbel
ekocer
emony
f
ory
ourdaught
erbutt
hischi
l
disnot
y
our
s.I
jaz
ikel
eli
!”
“
Mom Isai
dst
opsay
ingt
hisi
nfr
ontofa
chi
l
d!Thet
est
swer
edoneand
Lwandl
elwenkosi
ist
hef
ather
!”Mr
Nkosi
shout
s
“
Yeywemf
amandi
nikhul
umai
qini
so!
!”
Her
ewegoagai
n!Whycan’
tmy
daught
erbeaccept
ednj
ewi
thouthav
ing
peopl
edoubtherpat
erni
ty?I
’
m get
ti
ng
si
ckoft
his!

-
“
It
’sy
our
ight
!”IsayasIpushmywayi
n.
I
’
m angr
yandf
rust
rat
ed.Mywi
fei
sin
j
ail
forsomet
hingshedi
dn’
tdo.
“
Khuz
ani
hel
l
o,Imi
ssedy
ou”She
at
tempt
stohugmebutIpul
lheraway
t
hatshest
umbl
esbackwar
dandal
most
f
all
“
Don’
tyoudar
etouchme!Di
dn’
tIt
ell
y
out
ost
ayawayf
rom ushuh!
”
“
Whatar
eyout
alki
ngaboutKhuz
ani
”
“
Youar
emaki
ngmeaf
ool
,i
tsy
ou!
”
“
HeyIdon’
tknowwhaty
out
alki
ng
about
!”
“
Makhosi
youdon'
tfool
me!Iknowi
t’
s
y
ou!Youar
egoi
ngt
opayf
ort
his!Idon’
t
car
eify
oucomef
ormebutwheny
ou
t
ouchmywi
feuz
ongaz
imf
azi
ndi
ni!
”
“
Whycan'
tyouunder
standt
hatIdon’
t
l
ovey
ouhuh?Youar
esi
cki
nthehead
y
oucan’
tfor
cesomeonet
olov
eyou!
”
Shel
ooksatmeper
plex
ed
“
Don’
tactl
i
key
oudon’
tknowt
haty
ou
setmywi
feup,
nowshe’
sar
rest
ed!
”
“
Nokubongai
sar
rest
edwowt
his
deser
vesacel
ebr
ati
onmos.Lal
elaI
di
dn’
tsetupNokubongabutIwon’
tli
e
andsayI
’
m nothappyshe’
sinj
ail
.”
“
Namangamaani
t’
syou!
”
“
Ifi
twer
eme,
shewoul
dbedead”Il
ook
atherandshe’
sreal
l
yser
ious.
“
Yousai
dImustst
ayawayf
rom y
ou
r
ightandIdi
dsodon’
tcomeher
e
accusi
ngmeoft
hingsIhav
eno
knowl
edgeof
!”Icanseet
hatshe’
s
t
ell
i
ngt
het
rut
hthatshei
snott
heone
whosetherupsoi
fit
’snotSpi
deror
Khosi
thenwhoi
sit
?It
’scl
eart
hat
whoev
erdi
dthi
sknowsme.I
t’
stur
nout
t
hatt
hewomanf
oundi
nmybooti
sone
oft
hewomanIusedt
ofuck.Ineeda
pl
anasapbutIdon’
tknowwhatpl
an
andI
’
m af
rai
dthi
sti
mear
oundmy
cont
act
scan’
thel
pme.
-

Hei
spaci
ngupanddownhi
sbedr
oom
i
mpat
ient
lywai
ti
ngf
ort
hecal
l
.It
’sf
eel
s
l
i
ket
hecal
li
staki
nget
erni
tyt
ocome
t
hrough.Hi
sphonef
inal
l
yri
ngsandhe
answer
sit
“
Final
l
y!Tel
lmehe’
sar
rest
edr
ightnow”
“
Eish.
.ei
sh.
.”Theboyst
utt
ersont
he
ot
hersi
deoft
hel
i
ne
“
Eishei
shi
shear
rest
ed?
”
“
Nohewasn’
ttheonewhowasdr
ivi
ng
hi
scarbuthi
sfi
ancée”
“
Ohshi
tIaskedy
out
odoonesi
mpl
e
t
hingMz
iandy
ouf
uckedupy
ouar
eso
usel
ess!
”
“
It
’snotmyf
aul
tthi
ngst
urnedoutt
his
way
,howIwoul
dhav
eknownt
hatt
he
f
iancéewi
l
lbet
hewhowi
l
lbedr
ivi
ng
car
.”
“
Thi
sisf
uckedupnow!
”
“
Whatar
ewegoi
ngt
odonow?
”
“
Ineedt
othi
nk!
”Hehangsupand
gr
oansi
nfr
ust
rat
ion.Hedoesn’
tknow
howhewi
l
ltur
nthi
ngsar
oundandmake
t
hem wor
kinhi
sfav
orbutheneedst
o
assoonasy
est
erdaybecauset
imei
s
agai
nsthi
m.
HappyBi
rt
hdayThor
isoMaggi
e&
ThobekaMat
hanj
ana

CHAPTER62

“
Nex
tti
meIwon’
tmi
ss,
Iwi
l
lcr
acky
our
skul
lwi
thabul
l
et.
”Imi
ssedonpur
pose,
Iwant
edt
oscar
ehi
m andi
twor
ked.
He’
sashi
ver
ingmessandIcanseea
l
i
ttl
ewetst
ainonhi
sbox
er.Hepi
ssed
hi
msel
fIchuckl
e,f
oramanwhol
i
ke
f
ucki
ngot
herpeopl
e’
swomenhe’
ssuch
acowar
d.
“
Stayt
hef
uckawayf
rom mywi
fe!
”I
makemyex
itandhopi
nmycarbef
ore
dr
ivi
ngt
omypubandgr
il
l.If
indmy
f
ri
endMt
hoko,
hehasbeenhandsonat
ourbusi
nessl
atel
y,si
ncewef
oundout
t
hatourbarmanhasbeenst
eal
i
ng
al
cohol
.
“
Sur
ebr
a”wedoourhandshake
sequence
“
Ugr
and?
”
“
I’
m br
eat
hingman,
I’
m br
eat
hing.
”Isi
t
downandhej
oinsme
“
What
’sup?
”
“
Getmesomef
oodf
ir
stI
’
m st
arv
ing”He
snaphi
sfi
nger
scal
l
ingoneoft
he
wai
tr
essest
ofi
xussomepapandst
eak
“
Kuhambani
njay
ami
”
“
Vroui
ngi
dlai
zi
thendemf
ethu”(
mywi
fe
i
scheat
ingbr
o)Mt
hokoi
smybr
other
f
rom anot
hermot
her
.Wehav
ebeen
f
ri
endsf
rom wayt
uka.Hegotmyback
andIgothi
s.Thi
spubandgr
il
landmy
gar
agewoul
dn’
tbeasuccesswi
thout
hi
m.
“
Youar
ely
ingman”
“
I’
mtel
l
ingy
ou”Iex
plai
ntohi
m what
happened,
hewhi
stl
es.
“
Tjobr
a,I
’
m sor
ry”
“
Theydi
sgustme,
bot
hoft
hem!
”Ibang
t
het
abl
e
“
Cal
m downokay
”Thewai
tr
essbr
ings
ourf
oodandweaskf
ordr
inks,
Hei
nekeni
tis.
“
HowcanIcal
m downman,
whenI
cl
osemyey
esIseet
hem f
ucki
ngeach
ot
her
!”
“
Aymi
naIt
hinkshe’
sbr
avef
ort
ell
i
ng
y
ou”
“
IfKhuboni
wasnotmyuncl
eandhe
wasnotbl
ackmai
l
ingher
,woul
dshe
hav
etol
dme?
”
“
Ifi
twast
heot
herwayar
ound,
woul
d
y
ou?
”
“
Thi
sisnotaboutmeMt
hokoz
isi
”
“
Iknowbr
abutI
’
mtr
yingt
ogetwher
e
she’
scomi
ngf
rom.Shewas
hear
tbr
okenaf
tershef
oundouty
ouand
herbestf
ri
endhav
eachi
l
dtoget
herbut
y
ounev
ert
oldhery
ouf
uckedMi
ra”
“
Doest
hatmeanshehast
oopenher
l
egsf
ormyuncl
e?”
“
Ofcour
senotbutshedi
dn’
tknowhei
s
y
ouruncl
eandshewasdr
unk.You
know,
wedost
upi
dthi
ngswhenwear
e
hur
tanddr
unkt
henwakeupwi
th
r
egr
etst
hef
oll
owi
ngday
.”Igul
pdown
mybeer
.
“
Youar
eri
ghtbuti
tdoesn’
thur
tanyl
ess
ndoda,
kubuhl
unguf
uthi
kuy
angi
nyany
isa”
“
Iknowbutal
lI’
m aski
ngi
stot
hinkhar
d
bef
orey
oudoany
thi
ng.She’
syourwi
fe
andshe’
scar
ryi
ngy
ourki
dsnt
wana.
Ri
ghtnowshedoesn’
tneedst
ress”I
hat
eitwhenhe’
sri
ght
“
Arghst
opi
t!
”Hel
aughsandpatmy
shoul
der
“
YouknowIgoty
ou,
anyt
imeman”
“
Hai
suka!
”
“
Thatgi
rldi
gsy
oubr
a”
“
Wel
lIl
ovehert
oo”
“
Real
l
y?”
“
Whatdoy
oumeannow?
”
“
Mir
a”Heshov
esapi
eceofmeati
nhi
s
mout
h
“
Whatabouther
”
“
YouknowwhatI
’
mtal
ki
ngabout
”
“
BraImadepeacet
hatMi
raandIwi
l
l
nev
erbet
oget
her
”
“
Sur
eyoumadepeacebuty
oul
oveher
,
i
t’
sreal
l
yunf
aironGugu.Youar
enot
gi
vi
ngheral
lofy
oubecausey
ourhear
t
i
slongi
ngf
orsomeoney
ouwi
l
lnev
er
hav
e.”
“
Whatdoy
ouwantmet
odokeDrPhi
l
?I
l
oveGuguandsheknows.
”
“
Youdon’
tlov
eherl
i
key
oul
oveMi
ra.
Thepoorgi
rli
sgi
vi
ngal
lofher
sel
fto
y
oumar
awenay
ouar
egi
vi
ngherhal
fof
y
our
sel
fbecausey
ouar
einl
ovewi
thher
bestf
ri
end.Youknowy
ouwi
l
lnev
er
hav
eMi
rawhydon’
tyoul
ethergo!
Rel
easeherf
rom y
ourhear
tandf
ocus
onsomeonewhol
ovesy
ou
whol
ehear
tedl
y.Mi
radoesn’
twanty
ou
geti
tiny
ourt
hickskul
landf
uthi
nje
angazwhatdoy
ouseei
nher
.Shehas
scar
yey
esandshe’
sbl
i
ndayshecomes
wi
tht
oomuchbaggagenj
e”
“
Uyahl
any
awena!Mi
rai
sper
fecti
n
mor
ethanonewayandherey
esmake
hermor
ebeaut
if
ul.She’
sbl
i
ndso
what
?”
“
She’
snodi
ff
erentt
hanababyt
haty
ou
hav
etot
akecar
eof
”
“
EywenaMi
racandoany
thi
ngshewant
t
odoi
nfactev
erybl
i
ndori
mpai
red
per
sonoutt
her
ecandot
hings
i
ndependent
ly.Justbecauset
heyar
e
bl
i
nddoesn’
tmeant
heycan’
ttakecar
e
oft
hemsel
vesMt
hoko.
”
“
Hai
sukay
ouar
esay
ingt
hisbecause
y
oul
ovet
hatbl
i
ndgi
rl
.If
eel
pit
yfort
hat
act
orboyr
eal
l
yandI
’
m sur
ewheni
t’
s
comest
osexheal
way
shast
obet
he
onedoi
ngt
hings,
bor
ingsexl
i
feasf
uck!
Aymi
naI
’
dcheatonhershamei
nfr
ont
hermosv
eleakaboni
”Hel
aughs
maki
ngmeangr
y
“
Voest
ekMt
hoko!Ukhul
umaukuny
a
kodwanx
a!Bei
ngbl
i
nddoesn’
tmean
y
oucan’
tdot
hings.Whatdoessexgot
t
odowi
thsi
ght
?Fuseguy
angi
nyany
isa!
”
“
Sor
rybr
abesengi
shonj
e…”(
Iwasj
ust
say
ing)
“
Shutupwhoaskedy
ourst
inki
ng
opi
nioncozcl
ear
lyy
ouknownot
hing
aboutwhaty
out
alki
ngabout
!!
”Igul
p
downt
hel
eftcont
entofmybeerand
st
andup
“
AwSoxmf
ethu…”
“
Fucky
ou!
”ImakemyoutIcan’
tbel
i
eve
west
il
lhav
epeopl
eli
keMt
hokoi
nthi
s
dayandagenx
.Ir
ecei
vedacal
lfr
om
mymot
herasI
’
m dr
ivi
ngt
oherpl
ace.
I
’
m notr
eadyt
ofaceGugunow.Ineed
t
imeandspacebutIhear
dwhatMt
hoko
sai
dandIhat
etoadmi
the’
sri
ght
“
Mot
her
”
“
Boyhowar
eyou”Icanheari
nherv
oice
t
hatshe’
snotokay
“
I’
m goodwhat
’sgoi
ngon?Ar
eyou
cr
ying?
”
“
Wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
I’
m dr
ivi
ngt
oyourhouse”
“
Ohpl
easehur
ryup”
“
What
’swr
ongmama?
”
“
Woz
aMpendul
o”shehangsup.I
’
m
wonder
ingwhat
’sgoi
ngonnowandi
t’
s
doesn’
tsoundgoodsoIupmyspeed.
I
’
m wel
comedbyabl
ackbeast
,damn
howIl
oveFer
rar
i.IswearIwon’
trest
unt
ilIownt
hiscar
.It
’sper
sonal
i
zed
‘
PhakadeLami
’
.MmhIwonderwhoi
s
t
hat
.Iski
pinsi
det
hehouseandIcan
hearmal
evoi
cesasIappr
oacht
he
l
i
vingr
oom.
“
Sani
bonani
”Igr
eetandt
heygr
eetme
backbef
oreIf
indmyseatnex
ttomama.
Il
ookatt
heset
wounf
ami
l
iarmen
bef
oreme,
thei
rpr
esenceooz
esr
espect
andt
hei
rsenseoff
ashi
onscr
eams
sassy
.Ihav
enodoubtt
hatt
heyar
e
moni
ed.Thel
i
ghtski
nnedonel
ooksat
meandsmi
l
esat
ad.
“
Boyt
hesemenher
ear
eher
etosee
y
ou”Toseeme?
“
Ohokay
”Isaycur
iousl
y
“
SawubonaMpendul
o”say
sthel
i
ght
ski
nnedone
“
HiSi
r,howar
eyou”
“
I’
m okayandy
ou?
”
“
I’
mfi
ne”
“
I’
m sur
eyouar
ewonder
ingwhowear
e.
Sor
ryt
ocomeunannouncedi
fther
ewas
awayt
olety
ouknowwewoul
dhav
e”
“
Nopr
obl
em si
r”Isay
“
I’
m QhaweXul
uandt
hisi
smybr
other
Thembal
ami
Zwane”Theybot
hsmi
l
eat
me
“
Nicet
omeety
out
woMrXul
uand
Zwane”
“
Wear
efr
om Johannesbur
gandwe
wer
esendbymyuncl
etocomeandsee
y
ou”say
sMrXul
u
“
Youruncl
e?”
“
Yesmyuncl
eisy
ourf
atherboy
.”I
chuckl
e
“
Idon’
thav
eaf
ather
”
“
Mpendul
o”mom say
s
“
Whatmom i
t’
str
ue”
“
Justl
i
stent
owhatt
heywantt
osay
”
“
Yourf
atheri
sver
ysi
ck,
he’
sbedr
idden,
i
t’
sbeenf
ewmont
hsnow.Amont
h
backhet
oldusabouty
ourmom and
y
ou.Hi
swi
shbef
orehedi
esi
stosee
y
ouboy
”Il
aughr
eal
l
yhar
dunt
ilt
ear
s
f
all
myf
ace
“
Ohsonowt
hathe’
ssi
ckher
emember
s
t
hathemadesomewomanpr
egnant
!
Tel
lhi
m hemustdi
eal
readybecauseI
won’
tgr
anthi
m hi
swi
sh!
”
“
Mpendul
o…”
“
Mamast
opi
t,whyar
eyoudef
endi
ng
t
hismanhuh?
”
“
Iunder
standy
ourf
rust
rat
ionandanger
.
Yourf
atheri
sver
yawar
eofwhathedi
d
andwear
enother
etoj
ust
if
yhi
sact
ions.
Hei
stheonet
hatgotanswer
sfory
ou
myboyIr
eal
l
yhopey
ouwi
l
lchange
y
ourmi
ndbef
orei
t’
stool
atej
ustt
oget
cl
osur
eyouknow.
”Say
sMrZwane
“
Idon’
twantanswer
snorcl
osur
e
godukani
!”
“
Eywenasaandon’
trai
sey
ourv
oiceat
us!Youmi
ghtbemycousi
nbutI
’
m way
ol
dert
hany
ou.Ngi
zokuhl
ahl
abul
a
manj
e!”Say
sMrXul
u.Iswal
l
owhar
d.
“
I’
m sor
ryaboutt
hatgent
lement
heboy
i
sangr
ybutIpr
omi
seIwi
l
ltal
ktohi
m”
“
Thanky
ouMi
ssDl
ami
niwewi
l
lleav
e
ourcont
act
”MrZwanesay
s.They
ex
changednumber
s
“
Aikesesi
yi
ndl
ela”(
Wear
eleav
ing)
“
Hawani
saphuz
inet
iyenj
e”(
don’
tyou
wantt
ea)
“
Thanky
oubutwear
efi
ne”Theybi
d
f
arewel
landwal
kout
“
Uyangi
hlaz
amanj
e!”(
Youar
e
embar
rassi
ngme!
)
“
Whyar
eyoudef
endi
ngt
hisman!
”
“
I’
m notdef
endi
nghi
m butt
heset
wo
gent
lemendi
dnot
hingt
oyou,
you
shoul
d’v
eleastshowedr
espectt
othem”
“
EyIdon’
twantany
thi
ngt
odowi
tht
he
Zul
u,Zwane,
Xul
uwhat
evert
hei
r
sur
namei
s!”
“
Xul
uyourf
atheri
saXul
uwhet
hery
ou
l
i
kei
tornot
!Getov
eri
tmaanandgo
seet
heman”
“
Whyy
ounev
ert
oldmehi
ssur
name”
“
Younev
erasked!
”
“
Mom y
ouar
ehi
dingsomet
hingIcan
seei
t.Whathappenedbet
weent
het
wo
ofy
ou?
”
“
Itol
dyounj
e”
“
Wel
lI’
mfi
neIwon’
tgot
othatasshol
e
akaf
emay
efa!
”
“
Mpendul
omaan!
”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
haty
ouar
edef
endi
ng
t
hisman,
ory
ouwanthi
mtof
ucky
ou
pr
egnantagai
nanddi
tchy
ou!
”She
sl
apsmehar
donmycheekIseest
ars.
“
Don’
tyoudar
etal
ktomel
i
ket
hat
,I’
m
y
ourmot
her
!”Sheget
supandl
eav
es
mer
ubbi
ngmybur
ningcheek.

I
mfamai
zi
nqaz
akhoez
ishwabene
sal
ukaz
indi
ni!I
’
m sot
empt
edt
osay
t
hatbutIdon’
twantt
ocomeacr
ossas
di
srespect
ful
soIr
atherl
eav
ethi
shouse.
Idon’
twantmydaught
ert
ogot
hrough
t
hisagai
nasmuchasshef
orgotqui
ckl
y
aboutMpendul
obutshewassobr
oken
andconf
usedaf
tershef
oundoutt
hat
Mpendul
oisnotherf
ather
.Thebond
t
heyhadwasr
eal
l
yamaz
ingl
ucki
l
y
Lwenkosi
play
edhi
srol
eandmadeher
f
orgetaboutt
hati
nci
dentsonowher
eis
t
hisol
dhagt
aki
ngusback.Ihav
eno
st
rengt
hatal
landIwon’
tal
l
owherhat
e
t
owar
dsmet
ohur
tandconf
usemy
daught
er.Idon’
tev
enknowwhatIhav
e
ev
erdonet
othi
sol
dhag.
“
TakeushomeLwenkosi
”
“
Youseeshe’
srunni
ngawaynowshe
knowswhatI
’
m say
ingi
t’
str
ue!
”
“
Stopshout
ingatmymom gogoomubi
!”
Kamar
iasay
scausi
ngLwenkosi
to
l
augh.
“
Pleaset
akeushomeLwandl
elwenkosi
,
Iwon’
tsi
ther
eandl
i
stent
oyourgr
anny
cal
l
ingmenames”
“
Pleasedon’
tgoMi
ra”MrNkosi
say
s
“
Idon’
twantt
ocauset
roubl
eMrNkosi
andIabsol
utel
ydon’
twantmydaught
er
t
obeconf
usedandhur
tduet
oyour
mom’
saccusat
ions.Wehav
ebeent
her
e
bef
oreandi
twasn’
tsoni
ce,
Ibet
tergo”
“
Youar
enotgoi
ngany
wher
eMi
ra”mom
Zosay
sasshemakesherwayi
n
“
Mpi
ntshi
yami
ubuy
il
eesi
kol
eni
kuy
abhol
amawungekho”(
youar
eback
f
rom school
,i
t’
sbor
ingwi
thouty
ou)I
t’
s
onl
ythenIr
eal
i
zet
hatmom Zoi
swi
th
Sno.Weshar
elaught
er
“
OuchKamar
iasoI
’
m bor
ingy
ou”Mr
Nkosi
say
s
“
AywenaKhul
uyoudon’
twantust
o
pl
aynz
eee!
”Wel
aughonceagai
n
“
Snot
akeKamar
iaandgochangei
n
y
ourbedr
oom”Mom Zosay
s,Kamar
ia
wi
ggl
esher
sel
foutofmyar
msandr
uns
of
fwi
thSno
“
Don’
trunKamar
ia!Snont
hando!
”Ihear
t
hem gi
ggl
i
ngaway
.
“
SawubonaMama”Mom Zosay
s
“
Youshoul
dhav
est
art
edbygr
eet
ingme
i
fyouwant
edt
oZososav
eit
”
“
Mama!
”BabBheki
yel
l
s
“
It
’sokayhoneybutsheneedst
oknow
t
hatMi
rai
snotgoi
ngany
wher
eandshe
hast
ost
opsay
ingKamar
iai
snot
Lwenkosi
’
s.Iper
sonal
l
ydi
dthoset
est
s
andIhav
ebeenadoct
orf
ory
ear
s.I
f
she’
snotsat
isf
iedwi
tht
hatshemi
ght
aswel
ll
eav
e.Iwon’
thav
eherconf
usi
ng
mygr
anddaught
erandi
nsul
ti
ngmy
daught
er”mom Zosay
s
“
Zol
ekat
hisi
snotLwandl
elwenkosi
’
s
chi
l
dngi
yaf
ungaabaphansi
.Eymi
na
angi
yi
sebenz
iindabay
amagaz
i
l
eyanganeakusi
yoy
akwaNkosi
!
Lempuput
hekuz
omel
eikhul
umei
qini
so”
(
Idon’
tcar
eaboutbl
oodt
est
sthatchi
l
d
i
snotaNkosi
.Thi
sbl
i
ndgi
rlhast
otel
l
t
het
rut
h)
“
Andy
ouknowt
hathow,
youar
ea
sangoma?
”Lwenkosi
askscl
ear
ly
annoy
edbyhi
sgr
andmot
her
“
Iseet
heset
hingsI
’
m wayt
oool
d!Who
knowsmay
bet
hef
atheroft
hischi
l
disa
Keny
ani
anboywhodi
tchedhert
hesoon
hef
oundoutshe’
spr
egnantnowshe
wanty
out
opr
ovi
def
orherkwer
ekwer
e
chi
l
d!”
“
kwer
ekwer
echi
l
diz
inqaz
akho”I
coul
dn’
thel
pmy
sel
f,shecani
nsul
tme
t
hewayshel
i
kebutdef
ini
tel
ynotmy
daught
er.Wheni
t’
scomest
omy
daught
erIt
akeev
ery
thi
ngper
sonal
.
“
Yougoi
ngt
owat
cht
hisbl
i
ndgi
rlspeak
t
omel
i
ket
hatBheki
huh!
”
“
Mir
aapol
ogi
ze….
”
“
Hay
iBheki
musaukumenez
a.I
’
m si
ck
andt
ir
edofy
ourmot
her
!Ihav
ebeen
t
oler
ati
ngherf
ory
ear
sI’
mfedupnow!
Sheneedt
oleav
eri
ghtnow!
”
“
I’
m notgoi
ngany
wher
ethi
sismyson’
s
houset
oo!Youar
eadoct
ort
oday
becauseofmyhusband’
smoneywher
e
doy
ougett
hener
vet
oki
ckmeoutof
myson’
shouse!
”Mom Zochuckl
es
“
Bheki
ifshe’
sst
ayi
ngt
henI
’
mleav
ing
wi
thmychi
l
dren”wi
tht
hatsai
dIhear
f
oot
stepsshuf
fl
ingaway
.Yhoohowdi
d
wegether
e,If
eel
badnow.
“
Mom It
hinky
oushoul
dgo…”MrNkosi
say
s
“
Bhekumuz
imt
anami
uyangi
xosha?
”
(
Bhekumuz
imychi
l
dyouar
ethr
owi
ng
meout
)
“
AynaweMamaawuf
uni
ukut
hul
anj
e
f
oroncei
nyourl
i
fe!Go!Leav
e!”(
Ay
mom y
oudon’
twantt
oshuty
ourmout
h
f
oronce)Thi
sist
oomuchnowIgetup
wi
thmymuf
fi
nandheadt
oLwenkosi
’
s
bedr
oom.Icr
awl
ont
hebedandcr
y.I
f
eel
hor
ri
blenowt
hisi
sal
lmyf
aul
t.
“
Baby
”Hesay
sashewr
apsmei
nhi
s
ar
ms
“
It
’smyf
aul
t….
”
“
Heyhey
,it
’snoty
ourf
aul
t.Ioncet
old
y
ouandI
’
m goi
ngt
orepeatst
op
bl
ami
ngy
our
sel
fforot
herpeopl
e’
sfaul
t.
Ugogounesi
dinanj
enx
”
“
Butal
loft
hist
ranspi
redbecauseofme
Lwenkosi
…”
“
MyDol
l
facest
opi
tokay
.Thi
sisnot
y
ourf
aul
tsopl
easedon’
tbl
amey
our
sel
f.
Shhht
hul
ast
handwasami
”Hewi
pes
myt
ear
sandki
ssesmyf
orehead.
Momentofsi
l
encepassesus.It
akea
hugebr
eat
he
“
Lwenkosi
”
“
Sthandwasami
”
“
Doy
out
hinky
ourgogoi
stel
l
ingt
he
t
rut
h?”
“
Ayuy
abhedaugogobaby
.Mymom di
d
t
het
estandKamar
iai
smi
ne.Why
woul
dmom l
i
e?”
“
That
’swhatbaf
fl
esme,
yourmom wi
l
l
nev
erl
i
ebutIwassosur
ethatshe’
s
Mpendul
o’s”
“
Becausehe’
sthel
astmany
ousl
ept
wi
thwi
thoutcondom.I
t’
scl
eart
hatt
he
condom br
okeont
hatdayofourpi
cni
c”
“
Wenay
oudi
dn’
tseet
hat
?”
“
Idi
dn’
tnot
icebaby
,Ij
ustdi
scar
dedi
t”
“
Lwenkosi
youneedt
obecar
eful
wit
h
t
hispl
easeI
’
m beggi
ngy
ou”
“
Rel
axst
handwasami
Iwi
l
lbecar
eful
andIwi
l
lmakesur
eyoudon’
tfal
l
pr
egnantwheny
ouar
enotr
eady
”
“
Yout
alkasi
fyouar
ereadyt
ohav
e
anot
herchi
l
dnow”
“
Kamar
iai
s4y
ear
sol
dnowsekakhul
i
le”
“
Ayngekeshe’
sst
il
lababyf
uthi
let
’snot
t
alkaboutt
his.Wear
efi
newi
thKamar
ia
onl
y”
“
Ify
ousaysomyl
ady
”Hepr
esseshi
s
l
i
psonmi
ne,
weki
sspassi
onat
elyand
sl
owl
y.Ourt
onguesf
ight
ingf
or
domi
nance,
heposi
ti
onhi
msel
font
op
ofmeal
l
owi
ngmet
owr
apmyl
egs
ar
oundhi
swai
st.Icanf
eel
hishar
d
bul
geknocki
ngonmydoor
.
“
Daddy
!”
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
fundi
saumt
wana
ukukokot
ha!
”(Teacht
hechi
l
dtoknock!
)
Igr
oancausi
ngLwenkosi
tol
augh
“
Muuj
i
zawhatar
eyouanddaddydoi
ng”
“
Idon’
tknowasky
ourdaddy
”Isay
t
urni
ngt
otheot
hersi
deoft
hebedas
Lwenkosi
getof
fme
“
Mir
a!”Hegr
oans,
Ist
if
leal
augh.
Akamphendul
e.
“
Youknowwhatangel
facel
et’
sgot
o
t
hepl
ayr
oom andpl
ay”
“
Yaaaay
!”
“
Iwi
l
lbebackokay
”Heki
ssesmycheek
andr
oll
soutofbed.Iheart
hem wal
ki
ng
out
.Ideci
det
ocal
lmymom buther
phonesendsmet
ovoi
cemai
l
.It
ryuncl
e
Khe’
snotanswer
inghi
s.Iwi
l
lcal
lthem
l
aterIr
eal
l
ymi
ssmymom,
justt
ohear
herv
oicewi
l
ldo.It
hinki
t’
shasbeen
conf
ir
medt
hatI
’
m amommy
’sgi
rl
.Iget
upandheadt
otheki
tchent
odr
ink
wat
er,
ithel
pswi
tht
heheadachet
hat
keepscomi
ngandgoi
ng.Ihearmom Zo
andBabNkosi
argui
ngf
rom t
hel
aundr
y
r
oom.
“
Ngobami
nangi
ngenamama
ngi
ngenababakumel
eaz
enz
ele
umat
handal
aki
miumamawakho”(
So
j
ustbecauseIhav
enomot
hernora
f
athery
ourmom mustt
reatmel
i
kedi
rt
)
herv
oicei
scr
acki
ngshe’
ssoundsr
eal
l
y
hur
t.
“
Lal
elaZol
ekat
handanani
kahl
eno
Bonganomt
anakhekodwaungaphi
nde
nj
eugi
bez
euMi
raekhandal
amama
wami
!”(
List
enZol
ekal
oveBongaand
herdaught
eral
lyouwantbutdon’
tyou
ev
eral
l
owMi
rat
odi
srespectmy
mot
her
!)
Iheart
hedooropeni
ngandshut
ti
ng
t
henapai
nful
sob.It
akeahugebr
eat
he
andmakemywayi
n.Il
i
stencar
eful
l
y
andf
oll
owhersobunt
ilmuf
fi
ntouches
herwhi
chst
art
lesher
“
Mir
awhatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e”Isi
tnex
t
t
oheront
hef
loor
“
Ngi
yax
oli
samamabengaqondanga
ukukhandai
ngx
abano.
”(I
’
m sor
rymom I
di
dn’
tmeant
ocausear
if
t)
“
NoMi
radon’
tsayt
hati
t’
snoty
ou”
“
Iti
smemama,
youknowt
hatandI
’
m
v
erysor
ry.Idon’
tthi
nkmyst
ayher
eisa
goodi
dea.Thel
astt
hingIwanti
sto
causear
if
tint
hisf
ami
l
y.I
’
m sor
ryf
rom
t
hedeepestofmyhear
t”
“
Youhav
enot
hingt
owor
ryaboutokay
.I
pr
omi
sedy
ourmom t
hatIwi
l
ltakecar
e
ofy
ou.Youar
emydaught
eraswel
land
IknowIhav
enev
ert
oldy
out
hisbutI
l
ovey
oubaby
”Ismi
l
e,myt
ear
sescape
andf
all
downmyf
ace.
“
I’
m sor
ryabouty
ourpar
ent
s”
“
Thanky
ou”Icanhearasmi
l
einher
v
oice
“
I’
m sur
eyoumi
sst
hem”
“
Ever
yday
”shesay
swi
thaneart
ear
s
v
oice,
Ipul
lhert
omyt
highsandst
rokes
herhai
r.
“
Whatwast
hei
rfav
our
it
esong”
“
Soul
Prov
iderbyMi
chael
Bol
ton”Ican’
t
mi
ssasmi
l
einherv
oice
“
Tal
kaboutl
ove,
tal
kaboutt
rust
Tal
ki
n''
boutf
orev
erbaby
WhenI
'
mtal
ki
n''
boutus
Igi
vey
oumywor
d,st
ickt
omyguns
Bel
i
evemewhenIt
ell
yababy
Thatwe'
vej
ustbegun
Youdon'
tunder
stand,
no
Thef
ull
int
entofmypl
an
Iwantt
obey
oursoul
prov
ider
Iwantt
ost
ayt
hatway
Fort
hel
ongestt
ime
Iwantt
obe,
yoursoul
dpr
ovi
der
Justsayy
ou'
l
lletme
Anddar
li
n'Iwi
l
l
Iknowy
ou'
vebeenhur
t,Iknowy
ou'
re
l
oveshy
Youdon'
thav
etosayi
tbaby
I
t'
sgonnat
akesomet
ime
Yagotmyhear
t,i
nthepal
m ofy
our
hand
Sweari
t'
sgonnast
ayt
her
ebaby
Gi
vemehal
fachance
Youdon'
tunder
stand
Thef
ull
int
entofmypl
an
I
'
vebeenwai
ti
n'f
oral
ongt
imef
or
somebodyl
i
key
ou
Togi
vemyl
ove,
all
myl
ovedayand
ni
ght
Justsayy
ou'
l
lbemi
nef
ort
her
estof
y
ourl
i
fe
BabyI
'
llshowy
ouwhy
Iwantt
obey
oursoul
prov
ider
Iwantt
ost
ayt
hatway
Fort
hel
ongestt
ime
Iwantt
obe,
yoursoul
prov
ider
”Isi
ngas
Ist
rokeherhai
rIcanf
eel
myj
ean
get
ti
ngdampwi
thhert
ear
s.

Theaudaci
tyshehast
otel
lmet
hati
fit
wer
eher
,mywi
fewoul
dbedead!Ican
seet
hatsher
eal
l
ymeanti
t.
“
List
enher
eandl
i
stencar
eful
l
ywoman,
whaty
ouandIhadwasj
ustsex
,geti
t
t
hroughy
ourt
hickskul
l
.Ify
oudar
e
t
ouchmywi
feormyf
ami
l
yyouwi
l
lsee
whatI
’
m madeof
”Iseet
hatshedi
dn’
t
hearmet
hef
ir
stt
imeIt
oldhert
ost
ay
awayf
rom us.Ihav
etomakesur
ethi
s
t
imeshehear
sme.Zowar
nedmeabout
herandIadmi
tIdi
dn’
tknowany
thi
ng
aboutheri
nfactIhav
enev
erdugi
nfo
aboutt
hewomenIf
uck.Inev
ersawt
he
needt
o,i
t’
snotl
i
keIwasgoi
ngt
okeep
t
hem butIhav
elear
ntmyl
essonnow.
Ev
ery
onehasanagendanowaday
s,t
o
t
hinkIhav
eanenemyoutt
her
ewhoI
hav
enoknowl
edgeoff
rust
rat
esmet
o
t
hecor
e.
“
Whatdoesshehav
ethatIdon’
thuh?
”
“
Idon’
thav
eti
mef
ort
his,
Ineedt
oget
mywi
feoutofj
ail
”It
urnt
owal
kaway
butshegr
absmyar
m.Il
ookatherhand
t
henupt
oherf
ace
“
Tel
lmewhyher
,youowemet
hatmuch.
Whatdon’
tIhav
ethatshedoes?Am I
notbeaut
if
ul?Per
hapsshe’
sgi
vi
ngy
ou
wel
lthanme?What
’swr
ongwi
thme
Khuz
ani
,pl
easet
ell
me.Youar
enott
he
f
ir
stoneandI
’
m sur
eyouar
enotl
astt
o
r
ejectmeam Iunl
ovabl
e?”Shel
et’
sgo
ofmyar
mtowi
pehert
ear
s.If
oll
owher
t
othecouchandweset
tl
edownnex
tto
eachot
her
.Ihav
enev
erseenhert
his
br
oken.
“
It
’snoty
ouMakhosi
,i
t’
smat
ersoft
he
hear
t.Il
oveher
,ther
e’sabsol
utel
y
not
hingwr
ongwi
thy
ou.Youar
ea
r
emar
kabl
ewomananymanwoul
dbe
l
uckyt
ohav
eyoubutI
’
m def
ini
tel
ynot
t
hatman.I
’
mreal
l
ysor
ry”
“
Idon’
tknowwhyIkeephur
ti
ngmy
sel
f
l
i
ket
his?Seeki
ngf
orl
ove?Idon’
t
deser
vel
ove,
I’
m unl
ovabl
e.I
fmyown
mot
herhat
edmet
hatmucht
odumpme
ont
hedumpsi
tewhenIwasonl
yaday
ol
d,howdoIex
pectot
herpeopl
etol
ove
me?
”Shel
aughsast
ear
sfal
l
sdownher
f
ace
“
I’
m cr
azyneh”myhear
tbr
eaksf
orherI
can’
tbegi
ntoi
magi
nehowshef
eel
s.
Thewayshewasal
way
sbubbl
yar
ound
meInev
ert
houghtshei
shar
bour
ing
pai
nandanger
.
“
Noy
ouar
enotcr
azyKhosi
.I’
m sor
ry
aboutwhathappened,
Imaynotknow
whatwer
ether
easonf
orhert
odot
hat
butt
hatdoesn’
tmeany
ouar
e
unl
ovabl
e.”
“
Ther
e’snor
easonex
ceptHATEshe
hat
edme!Shecoul
dhav
eatl
east
abor
tedmeordumpmeatan
or
phanagenotdumpsi
te!Iwasonl
ya
dayol
dKhuz
ani
cry
ingmyl
i
ttl
elungs
out.
..
”Shebur
sti
ntot
ear
sIpul
lhert
o
mychestandenv
elopsherbody
“
I’
m sor
ry,
I’
mreal
l
ysor
ry”
“
Ifi
twasn’
tforMr
sMkhwanaz
iIwoul
d
hav
edi
ed.She’
stheonet
hatf
oundme.I
wi
shIdi
edt
hough”
“
Don’
tsayt
hat
,youar
elov
edKhosi
.Mr
s
Mkhwanaz
ilov
esy
ou”
“
Ithoughtshedoesunt
ilIr
eachedmy
t
eensev
ery
thi
ngchanged.Iwas
sl
aver
ingar
oundandherdaught
ers
di
dn’
tdoany
thi
ng.Idi
dev
ery
thi
ngf
or
t
hem,
cook,
washev
ent
hei
runder
wear
s,
mi
ndy
ouIwasy
oungert
hanher
daught
ersbutshedi
dn’
tcar
e.WhatI
r
eal
l
yappr
eci
atedi
sthatshenev
er
deni
edmef
ood.Ther
e’snosi
ngl
eday
t
hatIsl
eptwi
thanempt
yst
omach.As
f
ort
hecl
othesIal
way
shadt
oweart
he
onest
hatusedt
obeherdaught
ers.
Year
swentbyIr
emai
nst
rongandt
old
my
sel
fthatIhav
etogetgoodgr
adesso
t
hatIcangetoutoft
hathel
lhol
e.I
passedwi
thst
rai
ghtA’
sinmat
ri
c,
mat
hemat
icsandphy
sicsmar
kswer
e
t
hehi
ghest98%.Iwassopr
oudof
my
sel
fthathoweasi
l
yIgotachancet
o
f
urt
hermyst
udi
esandbecomeadoct
or.
That
’swhent
hemi
str
eat
mentst
opped
f
rom Mr
sMkhwanaz
iphel
aIwasnow
goi
ngt
obeabl
etopr
ovi
def
orherand
herdaught
erswi
tht
hei
rmanychi
l
dren
t
hathav
edi
ff
erentf
ather
s.”Byt
het
ime
shef
ini
shesmyhear
tisi
npi
ecessome
womengot
hroughal
otoutt
her
eand
y
oucannev
ert
ell
.It
’st
ruenev
erj
udgea
bookbyi
tscov
er.
“
YhoKhosi
I’
m sor
ryy
ouwentt
hrougha
l
ot,
whyy
ounev
ert
oldme?
”
“
Idi
dn’
twanty
out
opi
tymebutt
olov
e
me.
”
“
Ngi
yax
oli
sangal
obuhl
unguowabuz
wa
empi
l
weni
yakho.Iwi
sht
her
ewasway
t
otakeev
ery
thi
ngback.Youdon’
t
deser
vei
t.Noonedoes.Idon’
tknow
whyy
ourmot
herdi
dwhatshedi
dbut
i
t’
sherl
oss.Youar
ethegr
eatdaught
er
shecoul
dhav
eev
eraskedf
or.Iwant
y
out
oknowt
hatwhathappenedi
nyour
l
i
fedoesn’
tmeany
ouar
eunl
ovabl
e…”
shepul
l
sbackandt
akesmyhandi
nto
her
s
“
IfI
’
m notunl
ovabl
ewhycan’
tyoul
ove
meKhuz
ani
huh?Whycan’
tgi
veme
y
ourl
ove?
”
“
OhKhosi
I’
m sor
ry…”
“
PleaseIl
ovey
ouKhuz
ani
wit
hal
lofmy
hear
t”
“
Khos…”
“
Pleasedon’
tbr
eakmyhear
tli
ket
his.
I
’
m beggi
ngy
ou”
“
Kho…”shesmashesherl
i
psonmi
ne.I
pushher
“
Don’
t…”shedoesn’
tgi
vemeachance
t
otal
kbutdev
our
smyl
i
psIdon’
tknow
whatcameov
ermef
oramomentI
’
m
r
espondi
ngt
otheki
ss.I
t’
ssal
tyduet
o
hert
ear
s,api
ctur
eofmywi
fef
lashes
acr
ossmyey
es.Ipushherbackl
i
ke
she’
sbur
ning.
“
Ican’
tdot
his…”wear
ebot
hpai
nti
ng
“
Wehav
echemi
str
y,y
oucanf
eel
it”
“
NoKhosi
yousai
dyouwant
edmet
o
l
ovey
ounotpi
tyy
oui
fIwer
etogi
vey
ou
achancer
ightnowt
hatwi
l
lonl
ymeanI
pi
tyy
ou.Youdeser
vegenui
nel
oveandI
knowy
ouwi
l
lfi
ndone.
”
“
Makel
ovet
omef
ort
hel
astt
imey
ou
owemet
omakemef
eel
goodf
ort
he
l
astt
ime”shesay
sunbut
toni
ngher
bl
ouseandex
posi
ngherper
kybr
east
.I
swal
l
owhar
dasshet
akesmyhandand
squeez
esi
tov
erherbr
east
.Lor
dift
his
i
syourwayoft
est
ingmyl
oyal
tyf
ormy
wi
feIknowy
ouwi
l
lnotl
etmebe
t
empt
edbey
ondwhatIcanbear
.
“
I’
m sor
ry,
Ican’
tdot
hisKhosi
.Iwi
sh
y
oual
lthebestbecausey
oudeser
vei
t”I
j
umpupandmakemywayout
,bumpi
ng
i
ntoGuguont
hedoor
.
“
Uncl
eK”
“
Guguwhatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”She
l
ookshor
ri
bleandherey
esar
ered.I
hav
enodoubtt
hatshe’
sbeencr
ying
“
Icamet
oseeDRMkhwanaz
i”
“
Youknowher
?”
“
Umhy
esshe’
smydoct
or,
I’
m
ex
pect
ing”
“
Ohcongr
atul
ati
ons”
“
Thanky
ou”Shel
ooksatmybul
geand
chuckl
esbef
oremaki
ngherwayi
n.Iget
i
ntomycarandgr
oani
nfr
ust
rat
ion.
“
Dammi
t!
”Ist
artt
hecaranddr
ivesof
f
asImakeacal
l
.
“
Ihav
ebeenwai
ti
ngy
ourcal
lndoda”I
say
“
It
’snotSpi
derman,
Khany
i’
spussyi
s
dr
ivi
nghi
m cr
azy
.Whataboutt
hatKhosi
woman”
“
It
’snother
,I’
m comi
ngf
rom her
.Who
t
hef
ucki
sthi
skant
i!
!”
“
Idon’
tknowmanbuti
t’
scl
eary
ouhav
e
anewenemy
”
“
Ineedt
ogetmywi
feoutoft
hatpl
ace
man.
”
“
Ithi
nksheshoul
djustappl
yforbai
l
.
Getheragoodl
awy
erwhowi
l
lpr
oofher
i
nnocence”
“
Idon’
twanthert
oev
enappearatcour
t!
Iwantt
hiscaset
ovani
shl
i
kei
tnev
er
ex
ist
ed.I
ndabaz
amal
awy
ernani
nani
i
t’
stoor
iskyanddr
aggi
ng”
“
HaaaKhuz
ani
mfet
hut
her
e’smur
der
her
ethi
scasecan’
tjustdi
sappearnot
unl
essi
fyouknowsomegangst
erwho
haspol
i
ceonhi
spay
rol
l
”
“
YesSci
ssor
!”
“
Woahnonononothi
m Khuz
ani
you
can’
towet
hatman!
”
“
Ngenz
enj
ani
Slov
awat
chmywi
fesl
eep
i
njai
lforsomet
hingshedi
dn’
tdo!
”
“
Sci
ssori
snotamany
ouwantt
oowe
Khuz
ani
!”
“
Yout
hinkIdon’
tknowt
hatSl
ovaIdo
butt
her
e’snot
hingIcando.
”
“
Thi
sper
sonwast
rappi
ngy
ouwhi
ch
meanshewant
syounotBonga.They
won’
tfi
ndev
idenceonherandr
elease
her
”
“
Howsur
ear
eyouaboutt
hat
?Whati
f
Bongai
stheonet
heywant
edt
obe
ar
rest
edt
ogett
omeandt
heyhav
eal
l
t
heev
idencesetupf
orher
!”
“
Theywoul
dhav
eputt
hebodyi
nhercar
t
hen”
“
May
bet
heysawusl
astni
ghtcomi
ng
backf
rom mymom’
shouse.May
bet
hey
hav
ebeenkeepi
ngt
absonusf
orawhi
l
e
nowandt
heyknowBongal
ovesusi
ng
myJaguarwhenshe’
svi
sit
ingme.I
can’
tri
skl
i
ket
hatSl
ova!
”
“
Your
athersel
lyoursoul
tot
hedev
il
”
“
Asl
ongasmywi
fei
soutman,
Iwi
l
l
deal
wit
hthatwheni
t’
shappens”
“
Tjooy
our
eal
l
ylov
eherneh”
“
She’
smywor
ld”
Sci
ssori
stheonl
ymanwhocandot
his
f
ormeatt
hesamehe’
snott
hemanI
wantt
oowe.I
’
m conf
usedasf
uck!
Shoul
dIt
akear
iskandgetmywi
fea
l
awy
eroraskSci
ssort
ohel
pmet
hen
wai
tfort
hedayheasksaf
avourf
rom
me?
-

“
She’
sbeaut
if
uli
sn’
tshe?
”Mz
isnaps
hi
m outofhi
str
ance.He’
sref
err
ingt
o
t
hepi
ctur
eofBongat
hathef
ound
hi
msel
flostwi
tht
hought
sashewas
st
ari
ngi
t.
“
Yeah”Hesay
sandputbackherpi
ctur
e
i
nhi
sdr
awer
.Mz
igr
abst
hechai
rand
si
tsdown
“
Hav
eyout
houghthowt
hisi
sgoi
ngt
o
wor
k?”
“
Weneedt
ogetheroutofj
ail
”
“
Buthowar
ewegoi
ngt
odot
hat
?”
“
Idon’
tknowman,
Ineedheroutoft
hat
pl
aceassoonaspossi
ble.I
’
mrunni
ng
outoft
ime”
“
I’
m sur
eKhuz
ani
wil
lfi
ndheragood
l
awy
erandshemi
ghtgetbai
l
”
“
Thenwewi
l
lneedanot
herpl
ant
oget
r
idofKhuz
ani
”
“
Forgood?
”
“
Nonotf
orgoodIwanthi
m awayf
rom
herj
ustal
i
ttl
ebi
t”
“
Arey
ousur
eev
ery
thi
ngi
sgoi
ngt
o
wor
kli
key
oupl
anned?
”
“
It
’swi
l
lwor
kI’
mtel
l
ingy
ou,
all
Ineedi
s
t
oseeher
.Youwi
l
lseeev
ery
thi
ngwi
l
l
wor
kper
fect
ly”Hesmi
l
esf
aint
lyhopi
ng
t
hatev
ery
thi
ngwi
l
lwor
koutaccor
ding
t
ohi
spl
an.Theyhav
etoandassoonas
possi
blebecauset
imei
snoton
st
andst
il
l.
CHAPTER63

I
fsomeonewer
etoaskmewhathav
eI
ev
erdonet
omymot
heri
nlaw
consi
der
ingt
hewayshe’
str
eat
ingme,
I
woul
dn’
tknowwhatt
osayex
cept
say
ingIdon’
tknow.Ihav
etr
ied,
Lor
d
knowshowIhav
etr
iedt
otol
erat
eher
andpr
etendl
i
keherwor
dsar
enot
hur
ti
ngmebutt
hewor
dst
hatcomes
outoft
hatwoman’
smout
har
eli
kesl
ow
poi
son.Theyeaty
ousl
owl
yhenceI
don’
twantMi
rat
obesubj
ect
edt
omy
mot
heri
nlaw’
swor
ds.She’
sal
readya
br
okensoul
,who’
sonaheal
i
ngj
our
ney
,
shedoesn’
tneedany
thi
ngt
hatwi
l
ldel
ay
herheal
i
ngpr
ocess.
“
Theyar
ewat
chi
ngy
oumom ZoandI
’
m
sur
etheyar
epr
oudoft
hewomany
ou
hav
ebecome.
”Mi
rasay
saf
tersi
ngi
ng
mypar
ent
sfav
ori
tesong.
”
Thanky
oubaby
”
“
Whenwast
hel
asty
ouv
isi
tedt
hem?
”I
si
ghandgetupf
rom hert
highst
hen
wi
pemyt
ear
s.
“
It
’sbeeny
ear
sact
ual
l
y.Iuset
ovi
sit
t
hem ev
eryy
earont
hei
ranni
ver
sar
yday
butIev
ent
ual
l
yst
oppedbecauseev
ery
t
imeIwentt
her
ethepai
nrenewedso
myhusbandsai
drat
herIst
opv
isi
ti
ng
t
hem becausei
twasdel
ayi
ngmy
heal
i
ngpr
ocess”
“
Ihav
enev
erl
ostpar
ent
ssoIwoul
dn’
t
knowhowi
tfeel
sbutIcani
magi
ne.I
t
hinky
oushoul
dgov
isi
tthem may
be
t
hist
imei
twi
l
lfeel
dif
fer
entf
rom bef
ore.
”
“
Yout
hinkso?
”
“
Yeahmama,
youcan’
tav
oidt
hem
f
orev
eratsomepoi
nty
ouhav
etov
isi
t
t
hem.Theyar
eyourpar
ent
sandI
’
m
sur
etheymi
ssy
ourv
isi
ts.
”Ismi
l
e,such
abeaut
if
ulsoul
shei
s.
“
Ithi
nky
ouar
eri
ghtbaby
.Ihav
eto
maket
imeandgoseet
hem”
“
Ihav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
ocal
lmymom butI
can’
treachher
”Iswal
l
owhar
d
“
Uhm It
hinky
oushoul
djustl
ett
hem
hav
efunmybabyandenj
oyt
hei
r
engagement
”
“
Im sur
eshecanspar
emet
womi
nut
es
ofhert
imemama.Ij
ustwantt
ohear
herv
oice,
Imi
sshersomuch”If
orgot
howmuchofamama’
sbabyMi
rai
s.I
t’
s
onl
ybeenaf
ewhour
ssi
nceshel
ast
sawhermom butal
readyshemi
sses
her
.Thi
siswor
ryi
ngmewhati
fBonga
nev
ercomesoutofj
ail
.
“
Theyar
eawayf
orf
ewday
smydar
li
ng,
t
heywi
l
lbebacksoonokay
.Comel
et’
s
gopr
epar
esupper
”Igetupandhel
pher
getupt
oot
henwemakeourwayt
othe
ki
tchenandgetst
art
edwi
thpot
s.
“
Wher
e’sLwandl
e?”
“
Int
hepl
ayr
oom wi
tht
heki
ds”
“
Soy
ouandhi
m ar
ebackt
oget
her
?”
“
Uhm y
es”Il
augh
“
Whyar
eyoul
aughi
ngmama”
“
Ithoughty
ousai
dyouwi
l
lgi
vehi
ma
chanceaf
ter3y
ear
s”shegi
ggl
esand
cont
inueschoppi
ngt
heoni
on
“
Byt
hatt
imegi
rl
swoul
dhav
esnat
ched
hi
m awayf
rom me.
”
“
I’
m happyy
out
woar
ebackt
oget
her
,I
hopet
hist
imey
ouwon’
thur
teach
ot
her
”
“
IknowIwon’
thur
thi
m,def
ini
tel
ynot
i
ntent
ional
l
y.Il
ovey
oursonmama,
he’
s
t
hebestt
hingt
hathasev
erhappenedt
o
meaf
terourdaught
er.Thel
ovehehas
f
ormenotev
ent
hiswor
ldcanmeasur
e
i
t.If
eel
mil
l
ionst
imesbl
essedt
ohav
e
hi
minmyl
i
fe.Ir
ememberwhenhewas
cour
ti
ngmehesai
dIfIcangi
vehi
ma
secondchancehewi
l
lshowmehow
muchhel
ovesme,
thatIwi
l
lev
enf
eel
hi
slov
erunni
ngt
hroughmyv
einsoh
mamaandhewasr
ight
.Ther
ear
e
t
housandsgi
rl
sint
hiswor
ldbuthe
choseme,
Mir
aMt
himkhul
u,t
hebl
i
nd
gi
rl
.Ther
ear
equi
teaf
ewguy
sift
her
e's
ev
enanyatal
loutt
her
e,whowoul
dgo
f
orabl
i
ndgi
rl
.Hel
ovesmebey
ondmy
bl
i
ndness,
mynai
vet
y,chi
l
dishness,
my
i
nsani
ty,
mymadness,
myf
laws,
my
i
mper
fect
ions,
mybaggage.Goshheso
per
fecti
nmi
l
li
onway
smama”Ican’
t
mi
ssanemot
ionofl
oveasshet
alks
andhert
winkl
i
ngey
es.I
t’
shear
t
war
mingt
oseesucht
woy
oungst
ers
l
ovi
ngeachot
hert
hewayt
heset
wodo.
I
t’
sjustar
emi
ndert
hatt
hewor
ldi
sn’
t
t
hatbad.Ther
e’sst
il
lgenui
net
ruel
ove
outt
her
e,t
her
ear
est
il
lgi
rl
soutt
her
e
whoar
enoti
ntor
elat
ionshi
psj
ustf
or
moneyt
omai
ntai
nthei
rli
fest
yle,
ther
e
ar
est
il
lboy
soutt
her
ewhocanl
ovef
or
r
eal
notuset
hewor
d“l
ove”t
oful
fi
ll
thei
r
sex
ual
desi
resort
hei
regos.I
t’
sgi
ves
mehopet
hataspar
ent
swear
enot
doi
ngt
hatbadi
nrai
singourchi
l
dren.
Wear
edoi
ngal
lwecanf
ort
hem t
o
becomet
hebestv
ersi
onsoft
hemsel
ves.
“
Ohbaby
,he’
sal
sobl
essedt
ohav
eyou
i
nhi
sli
fe”
“
Ihopesomama”Icanhearuncer
tai
nty
i
nherv
oice
“
What
’swr
ong”
“
Not
hingmama”
“
Mir
ayouknowt
haty
oucant
rustme
r
ight
?”
“
IknowmamaandIr
eal
l
yappr
eci
atei
t.
Thanky
ousomuch.
”Ismi
l
eIhope
what
evershehasi
nhermi
nd,
shewoul
d
beabl
etot
alkabouti
twi
th
Lwandl
elwenkosi
orherpsy
chol
ogi
st.
Kamar
iaandSnor
unsi
ngi
ggl
i
ngas
Lwandl
elwenkosi
isr
unni
ngaf
tert
hem.
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
howmanyt
imesdoI
hav
etot
ell
yout
ost
opr
unni
ngaf
ter
t
hem t
heywi
l
ltr
ipandf
all
!”
“
Wewon’
tfal
lgogoz
i”Kamar
iasay
s
pant
ing
“
Yesmommy
”Snoaddsi
n
“
Wear
est
onggi
rl
sgogoz
i,st
onggi
rl
s
don’
tfal
l
”(st
rong)Kamar
iasay
s
showi
ngof
fherl
i
ttl
ebi
cepscausi
ngus
t
olaugh.Thi
schi
l
dcant
alkshame.
“
Muuj
i
zauhambi
l
eugogoomubi
sowe
ar
enotl
eav
ingr
ight
?”
“
AyKamar
iat
hat
'sr
ude,
youcan’
tsay
adul
tsar
eugl
y”Mi
rasay
s
“
Kodwamubi
nzeeemommy
,shehasa
bi
gnosel
i
keanel
ephant
”Snoand
Lwandl
ebur
sti
ntol
aught
er,
Icoul
dn’
t
hel
pit
,asmuchasIdi
dn’
twantt
olaugh.
“
GoshMamay
ouar
eal
sol
aughi
ng,
Kamar
iai
swr
ong”Mi
rasay
s
“
NoI
’
m notl
aughi
ngsi
s”Isayl
aughi
ng.
“
Sowear
enotl
eav
ingMuuj
i
zaangi
thi
.”
“
Nowear
enotl
eav
ing”
“
Yaaay
!Iwi
l
lsl
eepwi
thy
ouanddaddy
”
“
Nononoy
ouar
enotangel
face”
“
Hawdaddy
,whynot
?”Shesay
sbat
ti
ng
herey
elashes
“
Youwi
l
ldi
stur
bus!
”
“
From what
?”
“
Askhi
m wenababygi
rl
,Ial
sowantt
o
know”Il
ookathi
m
“
Nomom i
snotwhaty
ouar
ethi
nki
ng”
“
Itbet
ternotbeLwandl
elwenkosi
.”
“
It
’snotmamz
o..
.gi
rl
s,l
et'
snotdi
stur
b
t
hemomswi
tht
hei
rcooki
ngcome”I
chuckl
ehe’
srunni
ngaway
.
”
Ihopey
out
wowon’
thav
esexi
nmy
houseMi
ra”shecoughs
“
Ofcour
seMama”
“
Hav
eyouev
erdonei
ther
eex
ceptt
hat
daySnowal
kedi
n?”
“
No!
”
“
Youar
ely
ingMi
ra”
“
Iswearmama”Ichuckl
eandshakemy
head.
“
Yousuchabadl
i
arbutIwoul
dleti
t
sl
i
de”Ichanget
het
opi
caswecont
inue
wi
thourcooki
ng.Bysuppert
imewhi
ch
i
s7:
30pm wear
edoneandmyhusband
i
snotback.If
eel
hor
ri
bleaboutour
f
all
outbutIwi
shf
oroncehecant
ake
mysi
dewheni
t’
scomest
ohi
smom.
Usual
l
ywhenwear
efi
ght
inghel
ocks
hi
msel
fupi
nhi
sst
udyr
oom unt
ilhe
cal
msdownt
henwewi
l
ltal
kabout
what
evert
hatwewer
efi
ght
ingabout
.
I
’
m wor
ri
edIhopehe’
sonhi
swayhome
nowandhe’
sokay
.Mi
raandIsett
he
t
abl
eoncewear
edonewecal
l
Lwandl
elwenkosi
andt
heki
dst
oeat
.
Snogr
acet
hef
oodt
henwedi
ginor
shoul
dIsayt
heydi
gin.Ican’
tev
eneat
I
’
m anx
iousaboutmyhusband’
s
wher
eabout
s.
“
Mom ar
eyouokay
?”Lwandl
easks
“
Yesbaby
”If
akeasmi
l
eandgul
pdown
myj
uice.Af
tersupperLwandl
elwenkosi
andMi
rawasht
hedi
shest
oget
herwhi
l
e
Ibat
hKamar
ia.
“
Thanky
ougogoz
i”shesay
swhenI
f
ini
shbat
hingheranddr
essi
ngheri
n
herpaj
amas
“
Youar
ewel
comemydear
.Gi
vegr
anny
aki
ss”Ipur
semyl
i
psandshegi
vesme
awetki
ss.
“
Ilov
eyougogoz
i”I
’
m soi
nlov
ewi
thher
,
she’
ssoador
abl
e
“
Ilov
eyout
oobabygi
rl
”Ipi
ckherup
andmakemywaydownst
air
s.Iknock
onLwandl
elwenkosi
’
sdoorandhe
appear
sandt
akesKamar
ia.
“
Goodni
ghtbabygi
rl
”
Goodni
ghtgogoz
i”
“
Goodni
ghtKi
ds”
“
Goodni
ghtMama”Mi
raand
Lwandl
elwenkosi
say
sIt
henmakemy
wayt
ocheckonSno,
who’
sal
ready
f
ini
shedwi
thbat
hing,
she’
swear
ingher
paj
amasnow
“
Daddyi
snotbacky
et?
”
“
No”
“
Oh”He’
stheonewhousual
l
ytucksher
i
nandr
eadsherabedt
imest
ory
“
Comei
ntobed,
whatst
oryy
ouwantme
t
oreadf
ory
out
oday
”
“
Iwi
l
lwai
tfordaddy
”
“
It
’sl
ateal
readySnot
hando,
youar
e
goi
ngt
oschool
tomor
rowy
ourf
ather
wi
l
lcomebackv
eryl
ate”Shehuf
fs
“
Letmewai
tforanhourmommy
”
“
Youdon’
twantmet
otucky
oui
nand
r
eady
ouast
ory
”
“
Youdon’
treadl
i
kedaddy
.”mx
m konj
e
l
oisadaddy
’sgi
rl
.
“
HowcanIr
eadl
i
kedaddy
,he’
sman
andI
’
m woman!
”Ir
etor
t
“
Daddymakesev
erysoundofev
ery
char
act
erunl
i
key
ou”Ir
oll
myey
es.
“
OkayIwi
l
ltr
ytor
eadl
i
kehi
m come”
shet
akesherbookandgeti
ntobed.I
t
uckheri
nandst
art
sreadi
ng,
try
ingmy
bestt
omi
micwol
vesv
oices,
zal
ani
shameangi
namona.Ihearhersnor
ing
l
i
ght
lyandki
ssherf
oreheadt
henput
herbooki
nherdr
awer
.She’
sscar
edof
t
hedar
ksoIl
eav
ethel
i
ghtonandmake
mywayout
.It
akeashowerhopi
ngt
hat
whenIf
ini
shmyhusbandwi
l
lbeback
butI
’
m donenowandhe’
sst
il
lnotback.
Ipul
lar
obeandmysl
eeper
sthent
ake
oneofmyr
eads,
singl
eat34byNel
l
y
Shoz
anabef
oremaki
ngmyway
downst
air
s.Ir
elaxont
hecouchand
i
ndul
ge.I
t’
smi
dni
ghtwhenIheart
he
dooropeni
ng.Hemakeshi
swayi
nand
l
ooksatmet
henwal
ksupt
hest
air
case
wi
thoutsay
ingasi
ngl
ewor
d,l
eav
inga
per
vadi
ngsmel
lofal
cohol
.It
akeahuge
br
eat
heandgetupf
rom t
hecoucht
hen
f
oll
owhi
m.If
indhi
m undr
essi
nghecan
bar
elyst
andbuthe’
str
yingt
obest
rong.
Idon’
tli
keadr
unkBheki
especi
all
y
whenhe’
sangr
ybecauseheendsup
doi
ngst
upi
dthi
ngs.
“
Uphumaphi
?”(
Wher
ear
eyoucomi
ng
f
rom)Iaskaf
terput
ti
ngmybookaway
.
“
Indodaay
ibuz
wal
okhoZol
eka”(
You
don’
tasksaman’
swher
eabout
s)You
seewhatImean.Ichuckl
eandshake
myheadbef
orepr
epar
ingmy
sel
fto
sl
eep.Hej
oinsmei
nbedaf
tert
aki
ng
qui
ckashower
.He’
spr
essi
nghi
swar
m
bodyonmybackwhi
l
ecar
essi
ngmy
t
high
“
Munt
uza”Hewhi
sper
sinmyear
,
sendi
ngchi
l
lsdownmyspi
ne.Icanf
eel
hi
shar
dmemberpoki
ngmybut
t
“
Bhekumuz
i”
“
Cel
aungi
phakancane”t
ypi
cal
of
Bhekumuz
i.
“
I'
m sl
eepi
ngBheki
”
“
Kancanest
handwasami
”Hesay
s
ki
ssi
ngmyneckwhi
l
esqueez
ingmy
br
east
.Iwi
shIcansaywhathe’
sdoi
ng
i
snott
urni
ngmeonbutIwon’
tgi
vei
n,
nott
oday
!
“
Bheki
ha.
ha”Iwhi
spermyv
oicei
s
f
ail
i
ngmeal
readydammi
t!I
she
l
i
steni
ng?no,
hel
i
ftsupmyl
egand
makehi
swayi
nmewi
thonepushf
rom
t
hebehi
nd,
Iscr
eam
“
Shi
t!
”Hegr
oansi
nmyearandst
art
s
pumpi
ngonmehar
dgr
adual
l
ygr
owi
ng
hi
space.Hesai
d“kancane”butwear
e
goi
ngonf
or5t
hroundnowandIknew
hewasj
ustsay
ingt
hatbecausehe
knowswhenhe’
sdr
unkhehasener
gy
f
orday
s.
“
Munt
uzawakeup,
youar
egoi
ngt
obe
l
ateatwor
k”Igr
oanandcov
ermyhead
wi
tht
hecov
ers.GodI
’
m soex
haust
ed
andmybodyi
sachi
ng,
wesl
eptar
ound
5am.I
t’
sser
vesmer
ightbecauseIwas
supposedt
obemadatt
hisman!
“
Baby
”
“
AimaanBheki
!
”Canhel
etmebe
pl
ease!Idr
if
tbackt
omypeacef
ulsl
eep.
I
’
m wokenupbymyphoner
ingi
ngI
j
umpupandt
akei
t.Thef
ir
stt
hingI
not
icei
sti
me,
it’
s12pm.Wor
k!I
’
m
supposedt
obeatt
hehospi
tal
!
“
Nonono”Ij
umpupandi
gnor
eKhuz
ani
who’
scal
l
ingme,
whyt
heydi
dn’
twake
meup.Thebur
ningdownt
her
eis
maki
ngmyr
unt
othebat
hroom
i
mpossi
ble.Ihearal
aughasam I
’
m
aboutt
oent
ert
hebat
hroom
“
Ugi
j
imi
saokwedadanj
euj
aheni
”(wher
e
ar
eyour
ushi
ngof
frunni
ngl
i
keaduck)
“
Whyy
oudi
dn’
twakemeupBheki
,God
I
’
m sol
ate!
”
“
Iwokey
ouupnj
ebuty
oushout
edat
me.Don’
twor
ryIcal
l
edt
hehospi
tal
and
t
oldt
hem y
ouar
esi
ck”Isi
ghwi
thr
eli
ef
“
Thanky
ou”Hecomest
omeandpul
l
s
mynakedbodyt
ohi
m bef
oreki
ssi
ngme.
“
Comei
ntobedIwi
l
lgomakey
ou
somet
hingt
oeat
”Idoashesayand
answerKhuz
ani
“
But
i”(
Brot
her
)
“
Iwasatt
hehospi
tal
andt
heysai
dyou
cal
l
edi
nsi
ck,
arey
ouokay
?”
“
YeahI
’
m comi
ngupwi
thf
lue”
“
I’
m sor
rysi
s,beokaynehandhav
e
enoughr
est
”
“
Thanky
ou.
..
how’
sBonga?I
sther
ea
wayy
oucanmakemet
alkt
ohersot
hat
Icangi
veMi
rat
hephoneshemi
sses
hermom Khuz
ani
andMi
rai
snotaf
ool
shewoul
dnot
icesomet
hingi
swr
ong”
“
Don’
twor
ry,
I’
m sor
ti
ngt
hatout
,
hopef
ull
yBongawi
l
lsl
eephomet
oday
”
“
Wowt
hatsoundsl
i
keami
racl
e.What
ar
eyougoi
ngt
odoKhuz
ani
?”
“
Thel
essy
ouknowt
hebet
ter
”
“
Khuz
ani
uphekwani
?”(
Whatar
eyouup
t
o)
“
ByeIl
ovey
ou”
“
Khu.
..
”Hehangsuponme.It
hrowmy
phoneawaywonder
ingwhati
sthi
s
br
otherofmi
neupt
onow.Thedoor
swi
ngopenandmyhusbandmakeshi
s
wayi
nwi
that
ray
.Hepl
acest
het
rayon
myt
highs
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Whower
eyout
alki
ngt
o?”
“
Umf
azi
akabuz
wal
okhoBhekumuz
i”
(
youdon’
taskawomant
hat
)Hegi
ves
medeadst
are,
Iwi
pemyhandsand
st
arteat
ing.Hesi
tsnex
ttomeandt
ake
myphonet
hengoest
hroughi
t.
“
Youwantt
ogi
vemeahear
tat
tack”He
say
s
“
Ohdoest
hatmeanwher
eyouwer
elast
ni
ghty
ouwer
eupt
onogood”
“
Nobaby
,I’
m sor
ryaboutt
hat
.Iwas
wi
thSenz
owehadadr
inkbef
oreIknow
i
twewer
ehav
ingt
hewhol
ebot
tl
eof
whi
skey
”Senz
oishi
sfr
iendand
busi
nesspar
tner
.He’
sagoodf
ri
end
,
unf
ort
unat
elyIdon’
tgetal
ongwi
thhi
s
wi
fe.Ut
hi“
ngi
yaz
itshel
a”angaz
ike
ngani
.Ngi
gaz
imuncwanawheni
t’
s
comest
owomen,
Bongai
stheonl
y
womanwhogenui
nel
yaccept
edmeand
l
ovedme.If
oundasi
sterInev
erhadi
n
t
hatwoman.Ir
eal
l
yhopet
hatshewi
l
l
beoutoft
hej
ail
soon.
“
Younev
erbot
her
edt
oletmeknow
wher
eyouwer
eBheki
.Iwaswor
ri
ed
abouty
ou.Asi
fthatwasn’
tenoughy
ou
dr
ovewhi
l
eyouwer
edr
unkwhati
fyou
goti
nvol
vedi
nacaracci
dent
”
“
I’
m sor
ryst
handwasami
,Idi
dn’
tmean
t
owor
ryy
ou,
pleasef
orgi
veme”
“
Iwi
shf
oroncei
nyourl
i
fey
oucant
ake
mysi
dewheni
t’
scomest
oyourmom”
“
Ial
way
sdoZo”
“
Noy
oudon'
tBheki
.”
“
Ithr
ewheroutnj
e,i
sn’
tthatwhaty
ou
want
ed?
”
“
NoInev
erwant
edt
hatBhekumuz
i,i
f
y
oust
oody
ourgr
oundandst
andupt
o
herf
ormef
rom t
hebegi
nni
ng,
noneof
t
hiswoul
dhav
ehappened.Shewoul
dn’
t
f
indi
tsoeasyt
otal
kshi
ttome.Youar
e
al
l
owi
nghert
odoasshepl
easet
ome
andi
nmyhouse.I
twasf
inewhenshe
wasi
nsul
ti
ngmev
eleI
’
m usedt
oher
deget
oryr
emar
ksbutnotwhent
heyar
e
t
hrownt
omychi
l
dren.Iwoul
dnev
er
al
l
owhert
oinsul
tmychi
l
dreni
nfr
ontof
me,
ift
hatmakey
ouf
eel
li
keI
’
m
al
l
owi
ngmychi
l
drent
odi
srespecther
t
henf
oroncest
andupt
oyourmot
her
.”
“
Mir
aisnoty
ourchi
l
dZol
eka,
youar
e
al
l
owi
ngot
herwomen’
schi
l
drent
o
di
srespectmymot
heri
nfr
ontofme?
Way
ezi
bonaphi
uMi
rai
zi
nqaz
amama
ez
ishwabene,
shewasv
ery
di
srespect
ful
Zol
eka”Ichuckl
e
“
Bei
ngamot
herdoesn’
tmeany
ouhav
e
t
omot
herachi
l
dbi
ologi
cal
l
y.Mi
rai
smy
daught
erandt
hemot
herofmy
gr
anddaught
er,
thesamegr
anddaught
er
y
ourmot
herwasi
nsul
ti
ngcal
l
inghera
kwer
ekwer
e!Whyar
eyoudi
smi
ssi
ng
t
haty
ourmom i
ssodi
srespect
ful
and
r
udeBhekumuz
i?Howmanyt
imeshas
shecal
l
edMi
ranames,
remi
ndi
ngher
aboutherdi
sabi
l
ityasi
fshedoesn’
t
know?I
’
m notsay
ingi
twasr
ightf
orher
t
osayt
hatbutal
lI’
m say
ingweal
lreach
abr
eaki
ngpoi
nt.Li
keMi
ra,
Imy
sel
fI’
m
f
edupwi
thy
ourmom,
Idon’
twanty
ou
t
ofeel
li
key
ouhav
etochoosebet
ween
y
ourmot
herandmesowhenev
ershe
comesher
eIwi
l
lsl
eepatt
hehot
el.I
l
ostmyappet
it
e”It
ryt
ogetupbuthe
hol
dsmyhand
“
Don’
tgopl
ease,
let
’st
alkaboutt
his”I
l
ookathi
m andsi
gh
“
I’
m sor
ryt
hatIl
ety
oudown,
I’
m sor
ry
t
hatIal
l
owedmymom t
otr
eaty
oul
i
ke
di
rtal
lthosey
ear
s.I
t’
scl
eart
hatIt
ook
y
ourunder
standi
ngandki
ndnessf
or
gr
ant
ed.Iwi
l
lfi
xthi
sIpr
omi
se,
Idon’
t
wantt
olosey
ouorherZoandI
tbr
eaks
myhear
tthatmyt
wof
avor
it
ewomen
don’
tgetal
ongbuti
thast
ost
opnow.I
l
ovey
ousomuchandnev
erev
enonce
f
eel
li
key
oudon’
tmat
tert
omebecause
y
oudo.Wi
thouty
ouI
’
m not
hing
st
handwasami
.Ngi
yax
oli
say
ezwa”I
nodashewi
pesmyt
ear
sthathad
escaped.Ihav
eal
way
sbeen
under
standi
ngf
ory
ear
stowar
dst
hat
womani
fyouaskmeunder
standi
ng
whatIwoul
dn’
ttel
lyou,
thatwomani
s
r
udeandmeant
her
e’sabsol
utel
y
not
hingt
ounder
stand.Ial
way
swi
shed
t
hatBheki
coul
dst
andupf
ormebutal
l
hewoul
ddoi
sshout
s“Mama!
”
Kuphel
i
leke!You’
dswearhe’
s
r
epr
imandi
ngat
oddl
er.Il
ovemy
husbandIr
eal
l
ydoandIwoul
dhav
e
l
ovedt
ogetal
ongwi
tht
hewomant
hat
gav
ebi
rt
htohi
m butshenev
ergav
eme
achance.

Ihav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
ocal
lSoxbuthi
s
phonesentmest
rai
ghtt
ovoi
cemai
l
.I
sl
eptal
onel
astni
ght
,hedi
dn’
tcome
home.Icr
iedmy
sel
ftosl
eepl
astni
ght
.I
swearIhav
enev
erseenhi
mthatangr
y.
Idoubthewi
l
lev
erf
orgi
vemef
ort
his.I
don’
tseeuswor
kingt
hingsoutbutmy
hear
tisnotwi
l
li
ngt
oletgoofhi
m.Sox
i
stheonl
ymanIhav
eev
erl
oved
genui
nel
y,Ihav
ecomet
oreal
i
zet
hat
.
Si
tt
ingandcr
yingwasbegi
nni
ngt
o
suf
focat
emesoIdeci
dedt
ogoseeDr
Mkhwanaz
i.She’
sof
ftodaysoher
eIam
i
nherhouse.
“
Final
l
yyougotwhaty
ouwant
ed”Isay
“
OhIwi
sh”shesay
sbut
toni
ngupher
bl
ouse
“
Whatdoy
oumeannow”
“
Doy
ouwantany
thi
ngt
odr
ink”
“
No,
I’
mfi
ne”
“
Whatbr
ingsy
ouher
e?”Shesay
scol
dly
,
Inot
icet
hatherf
acei
sredsoar
eher
ey
es
“
Forsomeonewhoj
usthadadi
ck,
you
ar
etoocol
dMi
ssMkhwanaz
i”
“
Arghhedoesn’
tlov
emeGugu.Idon’
t
knowwhatIwasex
pect
ingst
oryofmy
l
i
fe”shef
akesasmi
l
ebutIcansee
t
hroughherey
est
hatshe’
shur
t
“
Whathappened”sheex
plai
nst
ome
whathappened.I
’
m shockedt
olear
n
t
hatmom Bongai
sar
rest
ed,
Iwonder
howMi
rai
sdoi
ng.Ist
il
lcar
eabouther
despi
tewhatIdi
d.
“
OhI
’
m sor
ryDoc”
“
Hear
inghi
m decl
ari
nghi
slov
efor
anot
herwomanbr
okemyhear
tint
oti
ny
pi
eces,
whycan’
tIf
indsomeonewho
canl
ovemel
i
ket
hatGugu?
”Shebl
i
nks
hert
ear
saway
.If
eel
sor
ryf
orher
shame
“
Your
siscomi
ngdocbepat
ient
”
“
Idon’
twantany
one,
Iwanthi
m,he’
s
mi
ne”
“
Youshoul
dhav
ehear
dhowhekept
cal
l
inghermywi
fe,
mywi
fe.Iwant
edt
o
di
eri
ghtt
her
eandt
hen!
”
“
I’
m sosor
ryshe’
stechni
cal
l
yhi
swi
fe
now,
theyar
eengaged”
“
What
?”
“
IthoughtIt
oldy
ou,
didn’
tI?
”
“
No,
youdi
dn’
t!
”
“
OhI
’
m sor
ry”
“
I’
mlosi
nghi
m Gugu”
”
Ithi
nky
oushoul
dlethi
m godoc,
he’
s
notwor
thi
t”
“
Iwantt
obutIcan’
t,
Ilov
ehi
m”shesay
s
wi
thaneart
ear
svoi
ce
“
May
bemom Bongabei
ngi
njai
lcan
wor
kiny
ourf
avor
”
“
He’
sgoneGugu,
Isawi
tinhi
sey
es.
Thatmanhasnev
erl
ovedme.I
twas
j
ustsexf
orhi
m.Whenhet
alksabouthi
s
l
ovef
ort
hatwoman,
hisey
esspar
kled.
He’
sinl
ovenotwi
thmebutwi
thherand
i
thur
ts”hert
ear
sfal
ldownherf
ace
f
reel
y
“
I’
m sor
rydoc,
I’
mreal
l
ysor
ry”Ipul
lher
t
omyar
msandhugheral
l
owi
nghert
o
l
eti
tal
lout
.Shecal
msdownaf
tera
whi
l
e,Igetupt
ofet
chagl
assofwat
er
f
orhert
hengi
vei
ttoher
“
Thanky
ou”shesay
swi
thherhoar
se
v
oice
“
Youwi
l
lbef
ine,
Ipr
omi
sey
ou.
”
“
Youshoul
dgonow”
“
ButIcantl
eav
eyoul
i
ket
his”
“
It
’snotl
i
key
oucar
eGugu”
“
Idocar
edoc”
“
Noy
oudon’
t,
all
youcar
eabouti
syour
mar
ri
ageandy
ourki
dst
haty
ouar
e
car
ryi
ng.Noonecar
esl
et’
snotf
ool
eachot
her
”myhear
tsi
nksIhav
e
somehowl
ear
nedt
oli
kehery
az
”
It
’snott
ruedoct
or,
Icar
eabouty
ouand
Il
i
key
ou.It
hinkIf
oundasi
sterInev
er
hadi
nyou”
“
YouandIknowt
hati
snott
rue,
youj
ust
wantmenex
ttoy
oubecauseIsav
ed
y
ourmar
ri
agesoony
ouwi
l
ldi
tchme
l
i
keev
ery
oneel
se.
”Ican’
tmi
sst
hepai
n
i
nherv
oiceandIhav
enev
erseenher
l
i
ket
his.Sher
eal
l
ylov
eKhuz
ani
hey
.
“
I’
m usedt
othi
snowandIt
hinki
t'
sti
me
Iacceptmyf
ate”
“
Ilov
eyousi
sKhosi
”shel
aughs
“
Youcan'
tl
ovemehowcany
oul
oveme
whenmyownmot
herhat
edme”
“
Whydi
dyourmom hat
eyou?
”Shet
ell
s
mewhathappenedbet
weensobsandI
can’
thel
pbutcr
ywi
thher
.Thi
sist
oo
much!It
houghtIhav
ebeent
hroughso
muchbutnowt
hisi
sthewor
st.
“
I’
m sor
rysi
sKhosi
”Idon’
tev
enknow
whatt
osay
.Icuddl
eherunt
ilshef
all
s
asl
eepsoIpl
aceheront
hecouch
gent
lyandgetaf
leecebl
ankett
ocov
er
herup.I
’
m notgoi
ngt
oleav
eherl
i
ke
t
hisandi
t’
snotl
i
keIhav
esomet
hingt
o
got
oathomemyhusbandi
sangr
yat
meandhei
snothome.Ideci
det
ocook
supperf
orher
.
“
Dinneri
sser
ved”Isaygi
vi
ngherf
ood.
I
t’
s7pm now.
“
Thanky
ousomuch”Ij
oinherandwe
eatwhi
l
ewat
chi
ngt
vandhav
ingsmal
l
chatt
her
eandt
her
e.At10pm wesl
eep
t
oget
heri
nherbedr
oom.Thenex
t
mor
ningIwakeupal
one,
Ist
ret
choutt
o
t
akemyphoneandIseeanot
e.
“
I’
m sor
ryt
oleav
ejustl
i
ket
hat
,Idi
dn’
t
wantt
owakey
ouupy
ouwer
esl
eepi
ng
peacef
ull
y.I
twasni
cemeet
ingy
oubut
I
’
m af
rai
dthatwast
hel
astt
imewesee
eachot
her
.Ihav
edeci
dedt
otr
avel
the
wor
ldy
ouknowmay
beIwoul
dfi
ndt
he
t
ruemeani
ngt
omyl
i
feandpur
pose.
Youcankeept
hehouse.Iwi
shy
oual
l
t
hebest
”wowt
otel
lyouI
’
m ast
ounded
woul
dbeanunder
stat
ement
.It
akemy
phoneandcal
lherbuti
tsendsme
st
rai
ghtt
ovoi
cemai
l
.Ican’
tbel
i
eveshe
l
eftmeherhouse.I
t’
sabeaut
if
ulsi
ngl
e
st
oryt
hathast
wobedr
oom,
openpl
an
ki
tchenandl
ounge,
abat
hroom anda
gar
age.Thi
sishugebutI
’
m gr
atef
ul,
shoul
dmyhusbandki
ckmeoutIwi
l
l
hav
esomewher
etogo.Ihav
ereal
i
zed
t
hatpeopl
edon’
twakeupandbecome
cer
tai
nchar
act
erst
henex
tmor
ningbut
t
her
esomeci
rcumst
anceswhi
chl
eads
t
hem t
obecomet
hechar
act
erst
hat
t
heyar
etoday
.Takeal
ookatme,
my
f
atherdi
sownmef
oral
ousycour
seand
mymom di
dn’
tst
andupf
orme,
f
ort
unat
eformemyhusbandwast
her
e
f
orme.Het
ookmei
nandgav
emel
i
fe.
Suchl
uckonl
ycomesoncei
nal
i
fet
ime,
Iwoul
dbeoutt
her
eint
hest
reetsel
l
ing
mybodyf
oral
i
ving.JustwhenIt
hought
ev
ery
thi
ngi
sgoi
ngwel
lther
ecomes
somet
hingt
hatwant
edt
otakeal
laway
t
hatf
rom me,
Ihadt
osor
titout
.Itwas
nev
ermyi
ntent
ionst
ocauseanyhar
mI
waspr
otect
ingmysecur
it
y.Thent
her
e’s
si
sKhosi
whowasdumpedbyherown
mot
heratt
hedumpst
erwhenshewasa
dayol
d,whatki
ndofamot
herdoest
hat
?
Asi
fthatwasnotenoughshewas
r
aisedbyawomanwhoendedup
maki
ngherasl
ave.Shewasdeni
edl
ove
whenshewasst
il
lani
nfantandnow
she’
sseeki
ngf
ori
tinev
erymanshe
meet
sit
’ssuchapi
tyal
lthesemenhad
noi
ntent
ionsofl
ovi
ngher
.Ift
her
e’s
any
onewhodeser
vesl
ovei
t’
sher
.It
br
ingsmesomuchpai
nthatour
mot
her
s,t
hev
erysamepeopl
ewho
car
ri
edusf
or9mont
hsar
etheones
t
hatf
ail
us.Iv
owt
omy
sel
fthatIwi
l
l
pr
otectmychi
l
drennomat
terwhat
.My
r
ingi
ngphonesnapsmeoutofmy
t
rance,
myhear
tski
psabeatwhensee
who’
scal
l
ing
“
Hel
l
o”
“
Wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
I’
m atDrMkhwanaz
i”
“
Arey
ouokay
?Ar
ethebabi
esf
ine?
”The
concer
ninhi
svoi
cemakesmesmi
l
ea
bi
t
“
Yeswear
efi
ne”
“
Buy
aekhay
angi
nikhumbul
e”(
come
backhomeImi
ssy
’al
l
)Ohdi
dIheart
hat
r
ightormyear
sar
epl
ayi
ngt
ri
ckswi
th
me?

If
eel
hor
ri
blet
hatLwenkosi
’
sgr
annyl
eft
becauseofmeandt
hef
ightt
hat
t
ranspi
redbet
weenmom ZoandBab
Bheki
isnotsi
tt
ingwel
lwi
thme.Idi
dn’
t
meant
oinsul
tLwenkosi
’
sgr
annyi
t’
s
sl
i
ppedoutofmyl
i
psf
orcef
ull
yduet
o
anger
.Thatwomannev
erl
i
kedmef
rom
dayonesheal
way
scal
l
edmenames
andr
emi
ndi
ngmeofmybl
i
ndnessasI
fI
don’
tknowt
hatI
’
m bl
i
ndori
t’
swr
ong.
I
’
m bl
i
ndandt
her
e’sabsol
utel
ynot
hing
wr
ongwi
tht
hat
.IfIwer
etochoseI
woul
dst
il
lchoset
obebl
i
ndbecause
t
hisi
stheonl
yli
feIknowandIf
ind
not
hingwr
ongwi
thi
t,af
teral
lI’
m scar
ed
oft
heunknownsobet
terst
ickt
owhat
I
’
m comf
ort
abl
ewi
th.Thepr
obl
em
comeswhenpeopl
etr
eatmeacer
tai
n
way
,li
kef
ussi
ngandt
hinki
ngt
hatIcan’
t
t
akecar
eofmy
sel
forwhent
heyt
hink
I
’
m ast
upi
dtoyt
opl
aywi
th.Nobodyand
ImeanNOBODYwi
l
linsul
tmydaught
er
andIkeepqui
et,
thechoi
ceofwor
dsI
usedi
swhatIr
egr
etbutIdon’
tregr
et
v
oici
ngoutmyanger
.Idon’
trespect
wher
eI’
m notr
espect
ed,
itsoneofmy
r
ulesandIl
i
vemyl
i
febymyr
ules.I
’
m
si
ckandt
ir
edofpeopl
ewhot
hinkt
hat
t
heycandokwasadanceov
ermyhead
j
ustbecauseI
’
m bl
i
nd.
I
nmydeepsl
eep,
I’
m wokenupbymy
cuddl
ecakeseat
ingmycooki
eli
kehe’
s
onacompet
it
ion.
“
Babby
yyKkkkamar
ia”Imoansof
tl
y
“
She’
ssl
eepi
ngbaby
”Thel
i
ttl
epr
incess
want
edt
osl
eepwi
thus,
mucht
o
Lwenkosi
sannoy
ance.Idon’
t
under
standt
hisguyr
eal
l
y,heknowswe
ar
enotsupposedt
ohav
esexi
nhi
s
par
ent
shousebutdoeshel
i
sten?Not
mycuddl
ecakes.If
eel
hiswei
ghtont
op
ofmeasheposi
ti
onbet
weenmyl
egs.
Hest
ret
chesov
erandIheart
hedr
awer
openi
nghe’
staki
ngar
ubberIpr
esume.
“
Arey
our
eady
”Hesay
saf
terwear
ingi
t
“
Yes”
“
Remembernonoi
sebaby
”Asi
fthat
woul
dbepossi
blebutIbi
temyl
i
pand
nod.Hepusheshi
msel
fsl
owl
yint
ome
unt
ilIf
eel
himf
ull
yandswal
l
owamoan
i
nmyt
hroat
.Wemakesl
owl
yanddeep
sweetl
ove,
bet
weenki
ssest
ryi
ngt
o
cov
erupourmoans.OhGodIwoul
dn’
t
t
radehi
sdi
ckf
ort
hewor
ld,
amaz
ing
doesn’
tbegi
ntodescr
ibei
t.I
’
minChi
na
speaki
ngChi
nese.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evewehadsexnex
ttoour
sl
eepi
ngdaught
er”Isayaf
terourl
ove
maki
ngsessi
on
“
Inmypar
ent
shouse”Hesay
sandwe
bot
hgi
ggl
e
“
Youar
esonaught
yMrNkosi
”He
gi
ggl
es
“
Mar
ababyuy
ashi
saIcan’
tgetenough
ofy
oui
zwa”Hemakesmef
eel
hisbul
ge
i
t’
srockhar
dagai
n!Igi
vei
tat
ight
squeez
ecausi
nghi
mtomoansof
tl
y
bef
oreget
ti
ngont
ohi
m andgi
vehi
m
t
hehead.Hi
smuf
fl
edgr
oansar
emusi
c
t
omyear
s,Isuckonhi
m har
dwhi
l
e
pl
ayi
ngwi
thhi
sbal
l
s.Iwantt
otr
y
somet
hingnewt
odayandswal
l
owwhen
If
eel
himj
erki
ngupIpr
epar
emy
sel
f.He
r
eleaseagr
oanf
rom hi
sthr
oatand
empt
yhi
sseedi
nmymout
h.I
t’
swar
m,
sal
tyandbi
tthi
cknotwhatIr
eal
l
y
ex
pect
ed,
Ifeel
li
ket
hrowi
ngup.’
Come
onMi
ray
oucanswal
l
owi
t!Wecan’
t
af
for
dtot
hrowupnow!
‘myi
nnersel
f
chast
isesme.Iswal
l
owwi
thasmi
l
eon
myf
aceeyphel
aint
ernetsayi
tsat
urn
of
ftosomeguy
stogr
imacewheny
ou
ar
eswal
l
owi
ngshuuuIper
sonal
l
ythi
nk
whoev
erwr
otet
hathav
enev
ert
ast
ed
andswal
l
owedaman’
scum.Ayngeke!
Thi
ngswedot
oimpr
essamadoda
Jehov
a!Icr
awl
ont
opofhi
m andki
ss
hi
m
“
Ilov
eyouMi
racl
e”
“
Ilov
eyout
oobaby
”
I
t’
sthenex
tmor
ningI
’
m hav
ing
br
eakf
astwi
thmymanandmydaught
er
i
nther
est
aur
ant
.Af
terbr
eakf
astwe
t
akeKamar
iat
othegames.I
t’
sal
way
s
ni
cespendi
ngt
imewi
thmyl
i
lfam unt
il
hoescomescr
eami
ngatmycuddl
e
cakesanddemandi
ngsel
fi
es.
“
Thel
evel
ofy
ourdi
srespecti
srepul
siv
e,
can’
tyouseeI
’
m wi
tht
hel
oveofmyl
i
fe
andourdaught
erher
eandy
ouar
ebusy
f
anci
ngme.Idon’
twanty
ournumber
awusukephambi
kwami
nxa!
!”The
annoy
ancei
nhi
svoi
cei
sloud.Wehear
t
hegi
rl
stal
ki
ngaswewal
kaway
“
Tjoangaz
ilomf
anauy
isi
l
imanoma
ut
hembekekakhul
uent
ombi
niy
akhe
phel
aibengekenj
eibonengobaay
iboni
”
(
Idon’
tknowi
fthatboyi
sst
upi
dorhe’
s
l
oyal
tohi
sgi
rl
fr
iend.Shewoul
dn’
tsee
t
hatwear
eex
changi
ngnumber
s)
“
Umdl
i
sil
eoengeke!Haaa!
”(Sheused
l
ovepot
iononhi
m)
“
Umdl
i
sakanj
ani
engaboni
?”(
Howwi
l
l
shedot
hati
fshe’
sbl
i
nd)
“
Youwi
l
lnev
erknow!
”
“
Ayukul
ayi
l
ekodwanawehowcany
ou
di
srespecthi
sgi
rl
fr
iendl
i
ket
hatj
ust
becauseshe’
sbl
i
nd”(
it
sser
vesy
ou
r
ight
)
“
Hawkahl
eukuz
enz
angcononawe
uy
amf
unauManqoba.
”(don’
tactsai
nt
y
oual
sowantManqoba)
“
Awmt
shel
ewenaoeangekenj
esi
dlal
e
i
mpumput
henat
hisi
yamf
unal
omf
ana!
”
(Tel
lwewon’
tbebepl
ayedbyt
hatbl
i
nd
gi
rlweal
sowantt
hatboy
!)
Theybur
sti
ntol
aught
er.
Lwandl
elwenkosi
cli
ckshi
stongue
“
Fuc.
..
”Icuthi
m of
f
“
Justl
eav
ethem okay
”
“
Whodot
heyt
hinkt
heyar
ehuht
hey
di
sgustme!
”
“
Rememberany
thi
ngy
ousaywi
l
lbe
usedagai
nsty
ouonsoci
alnet
wor
ks,
j
ustl
ett
hem be.
”
“
Arg!
”Hegr
oans,
wegof
oranani
mat
ed
mov
iet
oaccommodat
eourmoonl
i
ght
.
Wear
eonourwayhomewhenIr
ecei
ve
acal
lfr
om Gugu
“
Heybabyhowar
eyouhol
dingup”I
’
m
wonder
ingwhatshe’
stal
ki
ngabout
becauseIdi
dn’
ttel
lheraboutwhat
happened.Wear
enott
hatcl
osenow
andIt
hinkIhav
eaccept
edt
hatt
hings
bet
weenuswi
l
lnev
erbet
hesame
“
I’
m okaywena”
“
I’
m al
sof
ine.
..
I’
m sor
ryabouty
our
mom”myhear
tski
psabeat
“
Whatdoy
oumean”
“
Youdon’
tknowt
hatshe’
sinj
ail
for
mur
der
”Il
augh
“
Ithoughti
t’
sJunef
orApr
ilf
ool
pranks”
“
NoI
’
m notj
oki
ng,
yourmom i
sinj
ail
asky
ouruncl
eKheknows.Thepol
i
ce
f
oundadeadwomani
nyouruncl
e’
scar
andy
ourmom wasdr
ivi
ngt
hecar
”
“
UnamangaGugu!
”
“
Iswear
”Ihangupandcal
lmom buther
phonei
ssendi
ngmet
ovoi
cemai
l
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”Lwenkosi
asks,
I
ex
plai
ntohi
m whathappenedbuthe
al
sodoesn’
tbel
i
evei
t.I
’
m pani
cki
ng
now
“
Babycal
m downokay
,unt
ilweget
home.I
’
m sur
eit
’sami
sunder
standi
ng”
It
rycal
l
inguncl
eKbuthi
sphonei
s
r
ingi
ngunanswer
ed.Wegethomeand
Lwenkosi
takeoursl
eepi
ngdaught
er
f
rom met
henwemakeourwayi
n.Iget
my
sel
fagl
assofwat
erasLwenkosi
go
t
oputKamar
iai
nourbedr
oom
“
Youar
eback”Mom Zosay
s
“
Mom Zouphi
umama”(
wher
e’smom)
“
Itol
dyounj
e..
.”i
tmakessensewhyI
hadt
ospendf
ewday
sher
eandt
heyar
e
l
yi
ngt
ome
“
‘Mom Zopl
easet
ell
met
het
rut
h,she’
s
i
njai
l
?”
“
I’
m sor
rybabyshedi
dn’
twanty
out
o
know”
“
OhmyGod!
”Ibur
sti
ntot
ear
sLwenkosi
hol
dsmei
nhi
sar
ms
“
Iwantt
oseeher
”
“
Ipr
omi
sedher
..
..
”
“
Mom Zopl
ease”
“
Whydi
dn’
tyout
ell
usmom?
”Lwenkosi
say
s
“
Iknewy
ouwoul
dn’
tbeabl
etohi
dei
t
f
rom her
.”
“
Whyni
ngi
fi
hlel
aukut
hiumamami
use
j
ele?
”
“
Shedi
dn’
twanty
out
obehur
tbaby
,
pl
easeunder
stand”
“
Iwantt
oseeher
”wi
tht
hatsai
dMom
Zodr
ivesuswhi
l
eLwenkosi
is
comf
ort
ingmeatt
heback.Kamar
iai
s
wi
thMrNkosi
.Whenwear
ri
vet
hey
r
efuset
oletusseeher
.Mom Zot
ri
est
o
begt
hem butt
heydon’
tbar
ge.Il
etouta
hear
twr
enchi
ngsobaswedr
iveback
home.
“
Musaukukhal
ast
handwasami
shhh”
Lwenkosi
say
s
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
bri
ngheri
n”He
car
ri
esmei
nsi
det
hehouseandpul
lme
t
ohi
slap
“
Justhol
dherst
il
l”Ir
ememberf
eel
i
nga
pi
erci
ngpai
nonmyshoul
der
..
..

Nev
eri
nmywi
l
destdr
eamshav
eIev
er
t
houghtIwi
l
lsl
eepi
nacel
l
.Mysi
nsar
e
cat
chi
ngupwi
thme,
Khumal
oisf
ight
ing
f
orhi
msel
fforwhatIdi
dtohi
m.OhGod
howam Igoi
ngt
osur
viv
ejai
l
?Icant
ake
any
thi
ngbutnotj
ail
.Iwonderwhat
’s
goi
ngon,
whoputt
hatbodyi
nKhuz
ani
’
s
car
.It
houghtKsai
dSpi
derdoesn’
twant
r
evengeany
mor
eori
twasj
ustanact
.I
hav
etogetoutofher
e,i
fIgetl
ockedup
f
ory
ear
sthatwi
l
lki
l
lmydaught
er.I
don’
twantany
thi
ngt
hatwi
l
ldel
ayher
heal
i
ngpr
ocess.Iwi
pemyt
ear
sthat
can’
tst
opf
all
i
ng.Ihav
enev
erbeen
scar
edl
i
ket
hisi
nmyl
i
fe.If
indmy
sel
f
pr
ayi
ngt
oGodaski
ngf
orf
orgi
veness
andpr
otect
ion.Iaskhi
mtogi
veme
st
rengt
htof
acet
hisshoul
dthi
ngs
becomewor
set
hant
hisbecauseIf
eel
l
i
kei
t’
sjustami
sunder
standi
ngt
heywi
l
l
r
eleasemesoon.
“
Heyy
ou!
”Il
ookupatdoorwi
thmy
gl
assyey
es
“
Come”Igetupf
rom t
hecor
ner
,I’
mjust
gl
adt
hatIwasal
onei
nthecel
lbutI
knowi
twon’
tst
ayl
i
ket
hatf
orev
er.He
opensf
ormeandIgetoutt
henf
oll
ow
hi
m.
“
DoIhav
eav
isi
torsi
r”Doesher
epl
yme
no!
“
Whatt
imei
snow?
”Cwaka!myt
ear
s
dr
opwhenIseehi
m.Ij
umpt
ohi
sar
ms
hecat
chesmeandhol
dsmet
ight
ly
“
Idon’
twantt
ogobackt
her
eK,
please
don’
tal
l
owmet
ogobackt
her
e”
“
Youar
enotgoi
ngbackmysnookums,
I
'
mtaki
ngy
ouhomenow”Ipul
lback
andl
ookathi
m.
“
Real
l
y?”
“
Yes”Hesmi
l
esandwi
pesmyt
ear
s
t
henki
ssesme.
“
Thanky
ousomuch!
”Ican’
twai
ttosee
mydaught
erandmygr
anddaught
er.He
br
eakst
heki
ssandl
ooksatme
i
ntensel
y
“
Iwi
l
ldoany
thi
ngf
ory
ouev
eni
fIhav
e
t
osel
lmysoul
tot
hedev
iluy
ikhokonke
ki
mi”(
Youar
emyev
ery
thi
ng)Ismi
l
emy
t
ear
sfal
l
,It
’sonl
ynowInot
icet
hathe
l
ookst
ir
ed,
hisey
esar
eredandhe’
sst
il
l
wear
ingy
est
erday
’scl
otheswhi
ch
meanshehasn’
thadabat
htoday
.
“
Asambesi
yekhay
ast
handwasami
”
(
let
’sgohomemyl
ove)Het
akesmy
handandwemakeourwayout
.Ionl
y
bel
i
evewhenwear
edr
ivi
ngoutt
hatI
’
m
r
eal
l
ygoi
nghome.
“
Howdi
dyougetmeoutandwho’
sthat
woman”
“
Let
’snott
alkaboutt
hatnow,
it’
sov
er.
Youar
enev
ergoi
ngbackt
her
eokay
”
“
ButhowKhuz
ani
?”
“
Don’
twor
ryy
our
sel
fwi
tht
hingst
hat
don’
tmat
terany
mor
e”
”
Isl
epti
nthecel
lK,
theymat
ter
!”I
br
eat
heoutl
oudl
y
“
I’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
tmeant
oshout
,it
’sj
ust
t
hatIneedt
ounder
standwhat
’sgoi
ng
on.
”
“
Iwi
l
ltel
lyout
omor
row”
“
How’
sMi
raandKamar
ia”
“
AkuGuguophaphay
oshet
oldhery
ou
ar
einj
ail
,I
’m wonder
inghowdi
d
she.
..
oh”
“
What
?Howdi
dGuguknow?Oh
umt
anami
howi
ssheaf
terhear
ingt
he
news”
“
Iwentt
oseeKhosi
yest
erday
,It
hought
i
t’
sherwhosetusupbuti
t’
snotherand
ImetGugut
her
e.Khosi
isherdoct
or”
“
Soi
fKhosi
tol
dGugut
hatmeanst
hei
r
r
elat
ionshi
pismor
ethanj
ustapat
ient
andadoct
or”
“
Ithi
nksot
oobecauset
heywer
einher
housenothersur
ger
y”
“
Yout
ell
i
ngmey
ouwentt
oseeKhosi
in
herhouse”
“
Yesbaby
”
“
Tel
lmeev
ery
thi
ngt
hathappened”He
l
ooksatmet
henbackt
other
oad
“
Not
hinghappenedIaskedheri
fitwas
herandshedeni
ed”
“
Andy
oubel
i
eveherj
ustl
i
ket
hat
?Yaz
Zosai
dthatwomani
scr
azyIt
hinki
t’
s
herKhuz
ani
”
“
It
’snother
”
“
Howsur
ear
eyou?
”
”
100%”
“
Ayt
henwhoi
sit
?”
“
Thati
smy
ster
ytome”
“
Angi
thandi
njeul
okhuuy
ezi
ndl
i
niz
o
Khosi
”(Idon’
tli
kei
tthaty
ouwentt
o
Khosi
’
shouse)
“
Iwasn’
tther
eforf
unBonga,
Iwant
edt
o
l
ooki
ntoherey
esandseef
ormy
sel
fif
she’
sly
ing”Il
ookt
heot
hersi
deoft
he
r
oadandsaynot
hing.If
eel
hishand
squeez
ingmyt
highbutIdon’
twantl
ook
athi
m
“
Snookmuks”
“
Yini
”
“
Uthi
yini
kimi
?”
“
Khuz
ani
?”
“
Lookatme”Il
ookathi
m
“
Whyar
eyoumadatme”
“
I’
m notmad”
“
Comeonbaby
,Iseey
ou”
“
Iknowt
haty
ouwentt
her
enotf
orf
un
butIknowshewoul
dn’
thav
emi
ssedt
he
oppor
tuni
tyt
oseducey
ousewf
ike
kwakhe”Hecl
ear
shi
sthr
oat
“
Ohshedi
d,di
dn'
tshe?
”
“
Ngi
thandawenami
na”(
Ilov
eyou)
“
Whatdi
dshedoex
act
ly”
“
Canwest
opt
alki
ngaboutKhosi
st
handwasami
.”
“
WhydoIf
eel
li
kesomet
hing
happened?
”
“
Likewhat
?”
“
Idon’
tknowy
out
ell
me”
“
Idon’
tknowwhaty
ouwantmet
otel
l
y
oukahl
ekahl
e”
“
Whatdi
dKhosi
sayt
oyouorwhatdi
d
shedo?
”
“
Not
hingmosngi
ykut
shel
awhycan’
t
y
oubel
i
evemeBonga?
”
“
BecauseIseet
haty
ouar
ely
ingt
ome.
Ngi
yakwaz
iKhuz
ani
mawunamanga.
Awusuy
eumunt
uwamangakusheshe
kuz
ivez
enj
emawusunamanga”He
doesn’
tsayany
thi
ngbutconcent
rat
eon
t
her
oad
“
Youf
uckedherKhuz
ani
?”
“NoIdi
dn’
tNokubongasheki
ssedme
ar
eyouhappynow!
”Iswal
l
owhar
dasI
f
eel
ashar
ppai
ninmyhear
t
“
Ohwasi
tni
ce”
“
Nice?Ni
cey
ani
,yout
hinkIhadt
imet
o
enj
oyaki
ssf
rom myexboot
ycal
lwhi
l
e
mywi
fei
sinj
ail
mor
eov
erf
orsomet
hing
shedi
dn’
tdo!Lal
elaNokubongai
fI
want
edKhosi
Iwoul
dbewi
thhert
her
e’s
not
hingatal
lthatcanst
opmef
rom
bei
ngwi
thherbutI
’
m wi
thy
ou!Youar
e
t
heoneI
’
m maki
ngmywi
fe!Youar
ethe
t
heoneIwantt
ospendt
her
estofmy
l
i
fewi
th!Youar
etheoneIl
ovenother
awuy
ekeukungi
cikauf
unde
ukungi
themba!
!”Wef
all
int
osi
l
ence
“
Takemet
oZo’
shouse,
Iwantt
otake
mychi
l
drenf
ir
st”
“
Youar
espendi
ngt
heni
ghti
nmyhouse
r
ight
?”
“
Noi
nmyhouseIwantt
osl
eepwi
thmy
daught
erandgr
anddaught
er.“
“
EishIwant
edt
ohol
dyoui
nmyar
ms
t
hewhol
eni
ghtngi
khi
pheuv
alol
oki
thi
ci
shengal
ahl
ekel
wawuwe”
“
Tomor
rowI
’
m al
lyour
sIpr
omi
se.
”
“
Nokubonga”
“
Khuz
ani
”
“
Ngi
yakut
handa”
“
Ngi
yakut
handanami
Khuz
ani
kakhul
u
f
uthi
.”Hepul
lov
eratZo’
swegat
eand
weki
sspassi
onat
elybef
orer
ingi
ngt
he
i
nter
com.Hedr
ivesi
nandpul
lov
ert
hen
west
epoutofourcarandmakeour
wayi
n.Zosqueez
esmei
nherar
mst
he
momentwemakeourwayi
n
“
I’
m sohappyy
ouback”
“
Met
oosi
s,t
hanky
ouf
orl
ooki
ngaf
ter
t
hem”
"
Noneedt
othankme.
”Wewal
ktot
he
l
i
vingr
oom,
Bheki
wit
hKamar
iaandSno
ar
ewat
chi
ngRhy
thm ci
ty.Wegr
eet
t
hem andsi
tdown
“
Dragongr
anny
!”Shecomest
ome,
I
pul
lhert
omyl
apandki
ssherf
orehead
“
Howar
eyousi
s”
“
I’
m goodgr
anny
,mommyi
ssl
eepi
ng
wi
thdaddy
”
“
Okaysi
s”
“
Wecamet
oseey
oubutt
heydi
dn'
t
al
l
owusi
nsoshewascr
ying
hy
ster
ical
l
y,Isedat
edher
come”Igetupandwegot
o
Lwandl
elwenkosi
’
sroom
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
openup”Wehear
someshuf
fl
ingt
hent
hedooropens.
“
Mom Bonga!”Hel
i
ter
all
ythr
owhi
msel
f
i
nmyar
ms
“
Heyboy
!”
“
I’
m sohappyt
oseey
ou”hel
etusi
n
andIsi
tonhi
sbednex
ttoMi
ra.
”
Mir
acl
e..
.wi
l
lshewakeupnow?
”Iask
Zo
“
Yesi
t’
sbeenhour
snowsi
nceshe’
s
beenout
.”
“
Mir
a..
.baby
..
.Mi
rac­
le”
.Ishakeherand
shest
ir
sbutdoesn’
topenherey
es
“
Mir
ananguMamav
ukast
handwa
sami
”Shebl
i
nksherey
esopen
“
Mama”Shesay
swi
tht
ear
ingv
oice
“
I’
m sor
rybaby
,I’
m sosor
rybutI
’
m her
e
now”shesi
tsupst
rai
ghtandIsqueez
heri
nmyar
msasshesobs
“
IthoughtIwasnev
ergonnaseey
ou
agai
n”
“
I’
m her
ebabygi
rlandI
’
m notgoi
ng
any
wher
e”shenodsherhead.
“
Uyakut
handaumamay
ezwa”
(mommy
l
ovesy
ou)
“
Ilov
emommysomuchmor
e”It
hank
Zoandherhusbandt
henwel
eav
e,we
st
artatMcdst
henhome.Mi
rai
sinsi
de
wi
thKamar
iaI
’
m bi
ddi
ngf
arewel
ltomy
f
iancé.Hepul
l
smet
ohi
sar
msand
cl
aim myl
i
ps.Ihol
dhi
mfordearl
i
fe,
I
don’
tknowwhatIwoul
dbewi
thoutt
his
man.
“
Iwi
l
lseey
out
omor
row”Isay
“
OkayIwi
l
lbewai
ti
ngf
ory
ou”
“
Ilov
eyouandt
hanky
ousomuch”
“
It
’smyj
ob.Il
ovey
out
oo”Heki
ssesmy
f
oreheadt
henImakemywayi
n.Mi
ra
andKamar
iaar
eindul
gingonbur
ger
s.I
deci
det
otakeashowerf
ir
stbef
ore
j
oini
ngt
hem.
“
Whathappenedmama”It
ell
herwhat
happened
“
sonowt
heyr
eleasey
ouonbai
lor
?”
”
it
swasami
sunder
standi
ng”
“
Buthowwhent
heyf
oundacor
psewi
th
y
ou.Coul
dbepossi
blet
hatuncl
eK
ki
l
ledt
hewoman“
“
Kwi
l
lnev
erdot
hatsomeonewas
f
rami
nghi
m butIwon’
tgot
ojai
lnow
t
hatwhati
mpor
tant
”
“
Youshoul
dhav
etol
dmemamay
azI
wassohur
tukuz
wangoGuguwhi
l
eI’
m
y
ourdaught
er”GuguandKhosi
arenot
si
tt
ingwi
thmewel
l
.
“
I’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
twantt
owor
ryy
ou”we
changet
het
opi
cshet
ell
smeabout
Bheki
’
smom andherdr
ama
“
Yahl
any
alogogoukubabengi
khona
bengi
zomwul
angenkul
uimpama!
”
“
She’
ssor
udemama”
“
Udaki
we”whenwef
ini
sheat
ingour
bur
ger
swer
eti
ret
osl
eep.Thenex
tdayI
deci
det
otakemygi
rl
soutj
ustt
he3of
usbutonourwayt
her
eIgetf
latt
ir
ejust
asI
’
m aboutt
ocal
lKhuz
ani
.Acr
eam
whi
te“
myf
atherwasr
ich”Mer
cedes
Benzpul
l
sup.Agent
lemanst
epsoutof
t
hecarandcomest
ous
“
Sani
bonani
”Hesay
slooki
ngatme,
my
whol
ebodyf
reez
e,It
ryt
osay
somet
hingbutmyv
oicei
snotcomi
ng
out
.
CHARPTER64
Ist
ayr
oot
edi
nmyspotandwor
dsar
e
unabl
etocomeoutofmymout
h.I
tcan’
t
bepossi
ble,
I’
m dr
eami
ng,
yesi
t’
sa
dr
eam!Cal
myour
sel
fdownBonga,
it’
sa
dr
eam.He’
sdeady
ouknowhe’
sdead,
y
ouki
l
ledhi
mremember
?Hehada
bul
l
ethol
einhi
sfor
ehead.Youbur
ied
hi
mthi
sisaj
ustadr
eam.I
t’
sadr
eam!
I
t’
sadr
eam!Icl
osemyey
esandopen
t
hem agai
nonl
ytof
indhi
m st
ari
ngback
atmewi
thhi
ssmal
lpai
r.
“
You.
..
you.
.y
ou.
..ar
edead!Iki
l
ledy
ou!
”I
f
inal
l
yut
tert
hosewor
dsi
nat
remul
ous
v
oice
“
Mom what
’sgoi
ngon?who’
sthat
?”my
daught
eraskscl
ear
lywonder
ingwhat
’s
happeni
ng.
“
It
’snotwhaty
out
hinkBonga”Hesay
s
t
ryi
ngt
otouchmebutIbackawayand
shr
iekwi
tht
err
or
“
Don’
ttouchme!Hambamoy
amubi
!
Hambasat
hane!
!”
“
Bongacal
m downokay
,Iknowwhati
t
l
ooksl
i
kebuti
t’
snotwhaty
out
hinki
tis.
Youar
escar
ingt
hepoorchi
l
dnow”He
say
scal
mlyev
ent
hev
oicei
t’
sex
act
ly
l
i
kehi
s.Not
hiscan’
tbehappeni
ng!I
l
ookatKamar
iawho’
sfr
ight
enand
cl
enchi
nghert
inyf
inger
sonmyski
rt
.
“
Ufi
l
eKhumal
o!Uf
il
e!”(
youar
edead
Khumal
o,y
ouar
edead!
)
“
Mom di
dyousayKhumal
o?NoooHe’
s
dead!
!”Mi
rasay
swi
thshock
“
Yesmybr
otheri
sdead.
”Br
otherhuh?
“
Yourbr
other
?Vusi
doesn’
thav
ea
br
otherl
etal
oneat
winbr
other
”
“
Ihav
ehear
dthatwel
ookal
i
kebutI
’
m
nothi
stwi
nbr
other
.Wecan’
tdi
scuss
t
hisi
nthemi
ddl
eoft
her
oadcany
ou
pl
easegi
vemeachancet
oex
plai
n
ev
ery
thi
ngmay
beov
ercof
fee”I
t’
sat
rap
Bongadon’
tfal
lfori
t!Hewant
sto
av
engehi
sbr
other
,ift
hat
’sev
ent
rue!
Buthowi
sitpossi
blet
hathel
ooksl
i
ke
hi
mifhe’
snothi
sbr
other
?
“
Whatdoy
ouwantf
rom me?
”
“
Not
hingatal
lIpr
omi
seourencount
er
wasj
ustacoi
nci
dence”
“
Idon’
tbel
i
evey
ou”It
ryt
ocal
lKbutmy
handsar
etr
embl
i
ngmyphonesl
i
pand
f
all
downont
her
oad.
“
I’
m sosor
ry”Hepi
cksupmyscr
een
shat
ter
edphoneandgi
vesi
ttome
“
Iseet
haty
ouar
escar
edofmeandI
under
standbutl
etmehel
pyouwi
tht
he
f
latt
ir
efi
rstt
henIwi
l
lleav
e”sot
haty
ou
wi
l
lgetenought
imet
ogety
ourgoons
her
eorwhat
every
oupl
anni
ngno!
“
Myhusbandi
sont
hewayt
ofi
xthi
s
don’
twor
ryy
oucanl
eav
e”Isayt
ryi
ngt
o
actbr
ave
“
Okaynopr
obl
em.I
’
m sor
ryt
ospook
y
ou.Ihav
enev
ermety
ourl
atehusband
butIhav
ebeent
oldwel
ookal
i
keand
y
ourr
eact
ionj
ustconf
ir
med.Iapol
ogi
ze
agai
nforal
loft
his,
itwasn’
tmy
i
ntent
iont
oscar
eyou.
”
“
Soi
fyouhav
enev
ermetmyl
ate
husbandhowdoy
ouknowme?
”
“
Ijustf
oundoutabouthi
mfewmont
hs
backsoIhadt
odosomel
i
ttl
eresear
ch”
“
Youar
est
alki
ngme?
”Hel
aughsandI
not
icet
hathi
slaughi
stheonl
ythi
ng
di
ff
erentf
rom Khumal
o.Thebody
st
ruct
ure,
thev
oice,
hisdar
kchocol
ate
compl
exi
ont
hatcompl
i
menthi
ssex
y
smal
ley
esi
t’
sex
act
lyl
i
keKhumal
o.I
sweart
heyl
ookl
i
kei
dent
ical
twi
ns.How
i
sitpossi
blet
hatbr
other
scoul
dlook
al
i
kel
i
ket
his?
“
Nost
alki
ngandr
esear
chi
ngi
snott
he
sameBongaany
wayl
etmel
eav
eyou.
Hav
eagr
eatdayandonceagai
nI’
m
sor
ryt
oscar
eyoul
i
ket
hat
”Ist
areat
hi
m ashest
ri
dest
ohi
scar
.Hehoot
s
onceanddr
ivesof
fleav
ingmespooked
andconf
usedashel
l
.Idon’
twantt
oli
e,
par
tofmewantt
oknowhowi
sit
possi
blet
hatmyl
atehusbandhada
br
othert
hatl
ooksl
i
kehi
m.Iwantt
o
knowwhathei
supt
o?I
t’
scl
eart
hatt
his
manknowsmor
eaboutme,
whati
fhe’
s
her
etoav
engehi
sbr
other
?Whati
fhe’
s
t
heonet
hatsetmeup?I
tmakessense
butwhydi
dhel
eav
ejustl
i
ket
hatorhe
st
il
lhasapl
anuphi
ssl
eev
es?Ineedt
o
cal
lKhuz
ani
.
“
Maaa!
”
“
Yini
Mir
a?”
“
Ihav
ebeencal
l
ingy
ou,
arey
ouokay
”
“
YesI
’
mfi
ne,
pleasegi
vemey
ourphone
Ineedt
ocal
lKhuz
ani
”shehandsmeher
phoneandIcal
lK
“
Maf
ungwasewami
”Theyhav
ebonded
qui
ckert
hanIt
houghtandIcoul
dn’
tbe
happi
er.Il
ovet
hathet
reat
sherl
i
kehi
s
ol
derdaught
erhencehei
scal
l
ingher
“
Maf
ungwase”whi
chmeansf
ir
stf
emal
e
bor
n.
“
It
’smeK,
Ineedy
ounowpl
easecome
andgetus.Wehav
eaf
latt
ir
eandIdon’
t
hav
easpar
ewheel
”
“
Wher
ear
eyouguy
s”It
ell
him wher
ewe
ar
e
“
Pleasehur
ryupI
’
m scar
edsomet
hing
happened.It
hinkwef
oundsomeone
who’
sbehi
ndev
ery
thi
ng”
“
Whathappened?Ar
eyouguy
sokay
?”
“
Comewewi
l
ltal
kwheny
ougether
e”
“
I'
m onmyway
,pl
easecal
lmewhen
somet
hingi
shappeni
ngokay
?”Inod
wi
thmyheadandr
eal
i
zet
hathedoesn’
t
seeme
“
Yes”Ihangup
“
Let
sgeti
nthecarandwai
tfor
Khuz
ani
.”Wegeti
nthecarandt
urnon
t
heai
rconi
t’
sabi
tcol
d.
“
IthoughtKhumal
ohadsi
ster
sonl
y
mama”
“
Met
oo,
I’
m conf
usedandhel
ooksl
i
ke
hi
m Mi
ra.I
t’
sli
ket
heyar
etwi
ns”
“
Idon’
ttr
usthi
m,Idon’
tev
enbel
i
eve
meet
inghi
m wasacoi
nci
dence,
somet
hingi
sgoi
ngonmama.Whati
fhe
wantust
opayf
orwhaty
oudi
dto
Khumal
o”
“
Mywor
ryex
act
ly,
Ithi
nkhe’
sbehi
ndmy
ar
rest
”
“
Ohno,
that
’smeanshe’
scomi
ngf
or
r
oundt
wo.Idon’
twantt
olosey
ou
mama”f
eari
nherv
oicei
sev
ident
“
Youwon’
tlosemebaby
,Khuz
ani
wil
l
pr
otectus”
“
I’
m scar
edf
orourl
i
vesnow,
kant
ithi
na
whenwi
l
lwegetr
esthuh?
”
“
Don’
twor
rymybaby
,it
’sgoi
ngt
obe
f
ine.Wewi
l
lsor
tthi
soutokay
”
“
Yazmakungat
hiwaugogokaLwenkosi
wasi
dunusel
a,Iwoul
dn’
tbesur
pri
sed
t
hewaybadl
ucki
sfol
l
owi
ngus”Icant
hel
pbutl
augh
“
Youar
ecr
azy
”
“
Phel
aloy
agogounenhl
i
ziy
o
y
omt
hakat
hiukudunusel
wawuy
e
kubangai
zi
ndodl
azamabhadi
”
“
Haai
maanst
opi
t”Isayl
aughi
ng
“
Butont
heser
iousnot
emom,
I’
m
scar
ednowt
ost
ayal
onei
n
Johannesbur
gwhati
fthi
sKhumal
o
br
othercomesf
orme”
“
Yout
hinkIwasgoi
ngt
olety
oust
ay
al
one?I
’
m mov
ingi
nwi
thy
ou”
“
Iwasgoi
ngt
ocopet
houghmama”
“
Wakewahl
alawedwani
niMi
ra?
”(When
hav
eyouev
erst
ayal
oneMi
ra)
“
Whathappenedt
ofi
rstt
imef
or
ev
ery
thi
ng?
”
“
Hay
ithat
’snotgoi
ngt
ohappen”
“
Mom y
oul
i
ket
reat
ingmel
i
keachi
l
d
y
az”
“
Youal
sobehav
eli
keachi
l
d
somet
imes”
“
It
’snotacr
imet
obehav
eli
keachi
l
d
onceort
wicei
nawhi
l
e.Thi
sgr
owi
ngup
t
hingi
ecanbequi
teheav
yanddr
aini
ng
att
imes”
“
Ifeel
youbutknowt
hatI
’
m pr
oudoft
he
womany
ouar
ebecomi
ngev
ery
day
.I
knowt
hatI
’
m notawomany
ouar
e
pr
oudt
ocal
lamot
her
,IknowIhav
e
sai
dthi
ngst
oyou,
hor
ri
blet
hingst
hat
nomot
hershoul
dsayt
oherchi
l
dbut
t
hatdoesn’
tmeanIdon’
tacknowl
edge
t
hewomany
ouar
ebecomi
ngev
ery
day
.
I
tdoesn’
tmeanIdon’
tlov
eyouandi
t
doesn’
tmeanIdon’
tcar
eabouty
ou.I
l
oveandcar
eabouty
ousomucht
hatI
dot
hingst
opr
otecty
ou,
obl
i
vioust
othe
pai
ntheymi
ghtcauset
oyou.Nomat
ter
whatpl
easenev
erdoubtmyl
ovef
ory
ou.
I
t’
swhatkeptmegoi
ngi
fitwasn’
tfor
y
ouIwoul
dhav
egav
eupl
ongt
imeago”
“
Ohmamay
ouar
ethewomant
hatI
’
m
pr
oudt
ocal
lmymot
herandt
hanky
ou
somuchf
orev
ery
thi
ngy
ouhav
eev
er
donef
orme.Thanky
ouf
orgi
vi
ngme
l
i
feandmakemey
oursour
ceof
happi
ness.Ipr
omi
set
omakey
oupr
oud
oneday
.Il
ovey
ouwi
thy
ourPhD
dr
ama”Shesay
swi
thaamusi
ngsmi
l
e
onherf
ace
“
Hai
boI
’
m notdr
amat
ic!
”
“
Yeahr
ightmydaught
ert
ookaf
tery
ou”
Webot
hlaughandKamar
iaj
oinsusbut
Icanseet
hatshe’
slaughi
ngbecause
wear
elaughi
ng.
“
Atl
eastsomeonet
ookaf
termeay
wenay
ousuchat
rai
tor
!Di
dyouhav
eto
l
ookl
i
kemyf
athert
hough”Shel
aughs
“
Tal
ki
ngaboutbet
ray
alhuh”shesay
s
“
Bet
ray
alofcent
urybutIst
il
ll
ovey
ou
wi
thev
ery
thi
ngI
’
m madeof
.Youar
emy
oneandonl
ybaby
”
“
Ihopei
tst
aysl
i
ket
hat
”
“
Youdontwantabr
otherorsi
ster
?”
“
AwngekeNokubongaawukwaz
i
ukungi
l
amani
sasengi
ngaka!
”Shesay
s
dr
amat
ical
l
y,Il
aught
hischi
l
d!
“
Awdel
eli
”Shel
aughs.IseeK’
scar
par
kingi
nfr
ontofus
“
Kisher
e.Let
’sgetout
”Wegetoutof
t
hecarandmakeourourwayt
ohi
m as
he’
sli
ter
all
yjoggi
ngt
ous
“
Heyni
ri
ght
?”Het
akesKamar
iaand
hugsal
lofusatonce
“
Wear
eokayt
hanksf
orcomi
ng”He
ki
ssesourf
oreheads
“
Icameasf
astasIcoul
d”
“
Khul
u”Kamar
iasay
s
“
Yesbabygi
rl
”Shet
ell
sKev
ery
thi
ng
t
hathappenedabouta“
scar
yman”y
eyi
l
enganei
yagobhoz
aI'
mtel
l
ingy
ou.
Nev
erdosomet
hingi
nfr
ontofher
“
Thanky
oubabygi
rlf
ort
ell
i
ngmeokay
”
Ksay
sandKamar
ianodsherhead
“
Iwi
l
lsendsomeonet
ofet
chy
ourcar
l
et’
sgeti
nmycarandl
eav
e”Wegeti
n
hi
scarandhest
art
sthecart
hendr
ive
of
f
“
WhathappenedBonga”Iex
plai
ntohi
m
whathappenedandhecan’
thi
det
he
shocki
nhi
sface
“
No,
Vusi
hasabr
other
?!”
“
I’
m al
sosur
pri
sed”
“
It
’shi
m snookums,
he’
stheonewho
setusup”
“
I’
m scar
edofwhathe’
sgoi
ngt
odo
nex
t”
“
Ihav
etogethi
mfi
rstbef
orehegett
o
usf
ort
hesecondr
ound.Youguy
sar
e
goi
ngt
obel
i
vingwi
thmenowunt
ilI
knowex
act
lywhoam Ideal
i
ngwi
thand
whatdoeshewant
”
“
I’
m goi
ngt
oJohannesbur
gtomor
row
wi
tht
heki
ds”whenIwasi
nthatcel
lI
hadt
imet
othi
nkhar
daboutev
ery
thi
ng.
Iwantanewst
artandnewl
i
febutI
can’
tmov
efor
war
difIhav
en’
tmade
peacewi
tht
hepast
.Ineedt
ogoback
homeandf
ixev
ery
thi
ng.I
’
m doi
ngt
his
most
lyf
ormydaught
er,
Iwantt
ofr
ee
herf
rom al
lthepai
nandsuf
fer
ing
MaMdl
uli
sai
dshe’
ssuf
fer
ingf
rom.
“
Iwantt
oseeMaMdl
uli
”
“
Why
?”
“
Shehadav
isi
onaboutsomet
hingsoI
needcl
ari
fi
cat
ion”
“
Whyy
ounev
ert
oldme?
”Hel
ooksat
me
“
BecauseIdi
dn’
tthi
nki
tmat
ter
sKunt
ilI
t
houghtabouti
thar
d”
“
Mmhh”Hel
ooksont
her
oad,
wef
all
in
si
l
enceunt
ilhebr
eaksi
t
“
Wher
eam It
aki
ngy
ouguy
s?”
“
Ihav
elosti
nter
estt
ogooutnowgi
rl
s
howaboutwecancel
.Ipr
omi
set
omake
i
tupt
oyou”Il
ookatt
hem att
heback
seat
“
It
’sokaymommy
”
“
Noooi
t’
snotokaydr
agongr
annywhen
wi
l
lIgetmydol
l
?”
“
Wewi
l
lgosomeot
hert
imeIpr
omi
se
baby
,gogoi
ssi
cknow”
“
Letmesee”shet
ouchesmyf
orehead
“
Haaawenagogouy
alobhaawushi
si
mos”(
youar
enothot
)Kchuckl
es
“
Ihav
est
omachache”
“
Okayke”
“
I’
m sor
ryokayIwi
l
lmakei
tupt
oyou”
shenods,
wear
ri
veatK’
shouse.Ican
seet
hathe’
smad.Theki
dshav
ebeen
her
ebef
oresoIl
ett
hem f
eel
athome
andf
oll
owhi
mtohi
sst
udyr
oom.
“
Youar
emad”Hedoesn’
trepl
ybut
makesacal
ltosomeonewhenhe
hangsup,
Iwal
ktohi
m andsi
tonhi
s
deskf
aci
nghi
m
“
Tal
ktome”
“
I’
m busyBonga,
gomakey
our
sel
fbusy
ar
oundt
hehouse.Howabouty
oudomy
l
aundr
ysi
ncey
ouwon’
tbeher
etodo
y
ourwi
fedut
ies”Ichuckl
e
“
Sot
hisi
swhati
sabout
,megoi
ngt
o
l
i
vei
nJohannesbur
g”
“
Noi
t’
sabouty
ounotconsi
der
ingme
wheni
t’
scomest
oyourdeci
sion
maki
ng”
“
HawuKhuz
ani
…”
“
Don'
thawuKhuz
ani
meBonga.You
deci
dedt
haty
ouwi
l
lgot
o
Johannesbur
gandl
i
vewi
thMi
raandI
hav
etounder
standt
haty
ouar
egoi
ngt
o
l
i
ve566,
5ki
l
omet
ersawayf
rom me.
Tomor
rowy
ouar
eleav
ingt
o
Johannesbur
gbutIwasnott
oldabout
t
hat
.Youar
egoi
ngt
othesame
Johannesbur
gthathasShakawhoI
’
m
st
il
lwor
kingonget
ti
nghi
m ar
rest
ed.We
hav
eamanoutt
her
ewho’
shungr
yfor
ourbl
oodbuty
ouar
etaki
ngt
heki
dst
o
anot
herpr
ovi
nce.Howwi
l
lIpr
otecty
ou
guy
shuh?
”
“
Ithoughty
ouunder
standwhyIhav
eto
gol
i
vewi
thMi
ra”
.
“
Iunder
standt
haty
ouwantt
obui
l
d
y
our
sel
f,y
ouwantt
ohav
esomet
hingt
o
y
ournamewhatIdon’
tli
kei
sthaty
ou
keepmaki
ngdeci
sionsbuty
ouar
enot
consi
der
ingmehecky
ounotev
en
consi
der
ingt
hesi
tuat
ionathand.You
can’
tbegoi
ngt
oJohannesbur
gnow
whi
l
ewear
edeal
i
ngwi
thShakaandt
his
Khumal
obr
other
.Youwer
ear
rest
edI
hav
en’
tspentt
imewi
thy
oubuty
ou
goi
ngt
omor
row.Ishar
eev
ery
thi
ngwi
th
y
ouBongaev
enwhenIneedt
hel
oobut
y
oucantt
rustmeenought
otel
lme
whatt
hesangomasai
dtoy
ou.
Suqhamukausut
hiy
ouar
eleav
ing
t
omor
rowandIhav
etot
aket
hatj
ust
l
i
ket
hat
?Idon’
tknowi
fit
’smet
haty
ou
don’
tval
ueandr
espectenoughory
ou
ar
eli
ket
hisv
ele”myhear
tsi
nksIgetup
f
rom t
hedeskandsi
tont
opofhi
m,
st
raddl
i
nghi
m.
“
I’
m sor
ryst
handwasami
”Isay
wr
appi
ngmyar
msar
oundhi
sneck
“
I’
mreal
l
ysor
ry,
it’
snott
hatIdon’
tval
ue
orr
especty
ou.Iadmi
tI'
m wr
ongI
shoul
dhav
etol
dyouev
ery
thi
ngbef
oreI
r
eachedadeci
sionandy
ouar
eri
ghtt
he
si
tuat
ionathandi
squi
tedanger
ousat
t
hemomentsoIwi
l
lwai
tunt
ily
ousol
ve
ev
ery
thi
ng.I
’
m sor
ryokay
,pl
easef
orgi
ve
me”
“
I’
m notf
orgi
vi
ngy
ou”Hesul
k
“
Pret
typl
easeThabz
olowami
”Isay
ki
ssi
nghi
minbet
ween,
bit
inghi
s
ear
lobeont
hel
astone.Hi
sbr
eat
h
hi
tches,
Iknowt
hatspotr
ightt
her
eis
hi
sweakness
“
Ifor
giv
eyou”i
t’
scomesoutasagr
uff
whi
sper
.If
eel
hishandssqueez
ingmy
but
tocksandpul
l
ingmecl
osert
ohi
s
gr
owi
ngbul
ge.
“
Yousai
dyouwi
l
ltel
lmehowy
ougot
meoutofj
ail
”
“
Iwi
l
laf
tert
his”I
nasecondhei
supon
hi
sfeetwi
thmepi
nnedagai
nstt
hewal
l
andmyl
egscl
ampedar
oundhi
swai
st.
Wear
edev
our
ingeachot
her
’sl
i
psl
i
ke
wehav
ebeenst
arv
ingf
ory
ear
s.He
sl
i
desmypant
iesasi
deanddi
rect
s
hi
msel
finsi
deofme.It
houghtt
hisi
s
goi
ngt
obeaqui
cki
ebuthemakel
ove
t
omel
i
ket
hewor
ldi
sendi
ng,
thegood
t
hingi
shi
sst
udyr
oom i
ssoundpr
oof
ed,
eacht
hrusti
saccompani
edbywor
dsof
hi
sundy
ingl
ovef
orme,
atsomepoi
nt
wear
ebot
htear
ingup.
“
Ilov
eyousomuchmyj
aan”
“
Ilov
eyousomuchmor
emydaddyK”

“
Dammi
t!
”Hepunchest
hewal
lbr
eaki
ng
hi
sknuckl
es
“
Youneedt
ocal
m down!
”Mz
isay
s
get
ti
ngoutt
ofet
chi
cewr
appedi
na
di
shcl
oth
“
Her
e”Het
akesi
tandpl
acei
tonhi
s
bur
ningknuckl
es
“
She’
sscar
edofme,
howwi
l
lthi
swor
k
i
fshe’
sscar
edofme?
”
“
Shehast
obescar
edofy
ouZi
khal
i
r
emembery
oul
ookex
act
lyl
i
ket
heman
sheki
l
led,
whohappenedt
obeherl
ate
abusi
vehusband”
“
ButI
’
m nothi
m!”
“
Truebuti
twi
l
ltakehert
imet
ogetuse
t
oyou.I
t’
scr
eepyt
hewayy
out
wol
ook
al
i
ke.Onewoul
dsweary
ouar
etwi
ns”
“
AyIdon’
tlookl
i
keaghostmi
na!
”Mz
i
l
aughsathi
m
“
Usi
nekani
?”(
Whatar
eyoul
aughi
ngat
?)
“
Sor
rybutdon’
twor
ryshewi
l
lcome
ar
ound,
wej
ustneedt
ogetonwi
thour
pl
ant
odayt
heny
ouwi
l
lhav
eheral
lto
y
our
sel
f”
“
Idon’
tthi
nki
twi
l
lwor
kMz
imay
beshe
t
hinksIwantt
oav
engeVusi
shewi
l
lbe
mor
escar
edofmeandt
hat
’st
hel
ast
t
hingIwant
”
“
Youwi
l
lusey
ourchar
msnawephel
a
hawuandmakeherbel
i
evet
haty
ou
meannohar
m”
“
Arght
hissoundsl
i
keapr
ocessIhav
e
not
imeMz
i”
“
IknowZi
khal
i
,tr
ustmeIknowbutbe
pat
iental
i
ttl
ebi
t.Youwi
l
lendup
bl
owi
ngev
ery
thi
ngoutofpr
opor
ti
on”
“
Ihav
enopat
iencei
nmey
ouknow
t
hat
!”
“
Youhav
etot
eachy
our
sel
fke”

“
What
’swr
ongbaby
?”Isayt
omy
husbandwhol
ooksst
ressedout
.Icame
backhomeaf
terhecal
l
edmey
est
erday
.
He’
swi
l
li
ngt
owor
kthi
ngsoutbet
ween
usbuthesai
ditwi
l
ltaket
imebecause
ev
eryt
imehecl
oseshi
sey
eshesees
meandhi
suncl
efucki
ng.I
t’
sbet
tert
han
not
hingI
’
m gl
adhe’
snotgi
vi
ngupon
meandourmar
ri
age.
“
Myf
atherwantt
oseeme”Ist
op
st
ir
ri
ngt
hepotandl
ookathi
m
“
Yourf
ather
?”Wear
eint
heki
tchen,
I’
m
cooki
ngf
orhi
m whi
l
ehe’
shav
inghi
s
beersi
tt
ingont
hehi
ghchai
r.
“
Yes”Heex
plai
nsf
urt
her
“
Wowbabesaf
teral
lthesey
ear
s?He
hasl
i
vermosl
obaba”
“
Exact
lymyl
oveandmymom i
sbusy
f
orci
ngmet
ogoseehi
m.Whyshoul
dI
gr
antamanwhoabondonedmewhenI
wasst
il
li
nmymom’
swombhi
slast
wi
sh?
”
“
Uyadel
elashamebutIt
hinky
oushoul
d
goseehi
m babywhati
fyour
egr
eti
t
l
atert
haty
oudi
dn’
tgot
her
etoseehi
m”
“
Regr
etnev
erGugu!Nev
er!
”Hegul
ps
downhi
sbeerandgetanot
heronei
n
t
hef
ri
dge
“
I’
mjustsay
ingbaby
,Imeany
ouhav
e
not
hingt
olosebygoi
ngt
oseehi
m”
“
It
’snotaboutwhatt
oloseorgai
nthe
manabondonedus!Ihat
ehi
m noI
l
oat
hehi
m!”
“
Cal
m downokay
”Iwal
ktohi
m and
br
ushhi
sback.Iknowhowangr
yhe
get
swhenhet
alksabouthi
sfat
herandI
don’
tbl
amehi
m.
“
Youdon’
thav
etogoi
fyoudon’
twant
t
obutnj
eIwast
hinki
ngaboutour
babi
esy
ouknow.Whoknowsmay
be
t
heywi
l
lbeboy
sandt
heywi
l
lneedt
hei
r
f
ather
’ssur
name.I
t’
sbet
terwheny
ou
ar
eagi
rlbecauseatsomepoi
nty
ouwi
l
l
getmar
ri
edandchangey
oursur
name
unl
i
kewheny
ouar
eboy
.Youhav
eto
gr
owy
oursur
nameandt
eachy
ourki
ds
t
hei
rroot
s”Hel
ooksatme
“
It
’sunf
airGugu,
ver
yunf
air
”
“
Iknowbabybuty
ouar
egoi
ngt
obea
f
athernowt
hinkabouty
ourki
dst
oo”He
pul
l
smet
ohi
slapandhol
dsme,
Ihol
d
hi
m backf
ordearl
i
fe.
“
Youwi
l
lcomewi
thme?
”
“
Ofcour
sebaby
,I’
m wi
thy
ouev
eryst
ep
oft
heway
”
-

Idon’
tknowr
eal
l
ywhatmymom andI
woul
dbewi
thoutuncl
eK.Hehasbeena
bl
essi
ng.I
'
m sohappyt
hatmymom i
s
outofj
ail
andshe’
snotgoi
ngbackt
her
e
howev
erIwonderhowdi
duncl
eK
managet
opul
lthatof
f.It
houghtIwi
l
l
nev
erseeheragai
n,Godt
he4y
ear
sI
spentwi
thoutherwer
ethewor
sty
ear
s
ofmyl
i
fe.Ir
eal
l
ycan’
tgot
hrought
hat
agai
nandIknowhowbr
utal
jai
li
s.My
mom woul
dn’
thav
esur
viv
edt
hatand
she’
sbeent
hroughal
otal
readyshe
deser
vessomehappi
nessbutkebad
l
uckkeepsf
oll
owi
ngus.Li
kewher
ethe
hel
li
sKhumal
o’sbr
othercomi
ngf
rom
nowar
gamaan!Saz
esav
elel
wa
uKhumal
onomaesi
fi
le.He’
sst
il
lapai
n
i
ntheassev
eni
nhi
sgr
ave.I
fit
’snot
Spi
derwho’
sav
engi
nghi
mit
’shi
s
“
brot
her
”wehadnoknowl
edgeof
.I
di
dn’
tli
ket
hei
deaofmymom gi
vi
ng
awaywi
thev
ery
thi
ngt
hatbel
ongt
o
Khumal
obutnowIagr
ee.Ev
ery
thi
ng
t
hathasKhumal
onamemustgoi
t’
s
comeswi
tht
oomuchbadl
uck.Idon’
t
t
hinkhewi
l
lletusenj
oyhi
smoney
consi
der
ingt
hewayhedi
ed,
mightas
wel
lpassof
fev
ery
thi
ng.I
t’
sti
menowI
t
akecar
eofmymot
heraf
terev
ery
thi
ng
she’
sbeent
hroughr
aisi
ngme.Iknew
shewoul
dn’
tal
l
owmet
ost
ayal
onewel
l
Iguessi
tiswhati
tis,
atl
eastt
hough
t
hatwi
l
lmeanIwi
l
lal
sobest
ayi
ngwi
th
mydaught
er.IhopeLwenkosi
wil
lnot
t
hrowt
ant
rumst
hatI
’
mtaki
ngKamar
ia
wi
thme.Hecanbesuchat
oddl
erat
t
imes,
it’
snotl
i
kehewon’
tgethi
sweeks
wi
thherl
i
keIwi
l
lhav
emi
newi
thher
.
Speaki
ngoft
hedev
il
“
Mycuddl
escakes”
“
Howar
eyoumyDol
l
face”
“
I’
m goodandy
our
sel
f”
“
Imi
ssy
ou”
“
Iwast
her
enj
enay
est
erdaybaby
”
“
Idon’
twanty
out
oleav
emysi
ght
”
“
Ohy
ousuchacr
ybaby
”
“
Yourcr
ybaby
..
.whenam Igoi
ngt
osee
y
ou?
”
“
Idon’
tknow,
I’
m goi
ngt
o
Johannesbur
gtomor
row”
“
Andy
oudi
dn’
ttel
lme?
”
“
I'
m sor
ry,
Ial
sodi
dn’
tknowmymom
j
ustt
oldmenow”
“
Ohokayt
henIhav
etoseey
ouke
t
oday
”
“
I’
m atmal
umeK’
shousey
oucancome
by
”
“
Whyar
eyout
her
e?”
“
Theybel
i
evewear
eindangersoi
t’
s
goi
ngt
obeeasyf
orhi
mtopr
otectus
whenwear
enex
ttohi
m”
“
Dangerwhatki
ndofdanger
?”
“Khumal
ohasabr
otherandt
heyt
hink
hewi
l
lav
engehi
m”
“
OhJesuwhenwi
l
lthi
sendmar
ayeh?
”
“
Idon’
tknowbaby
”
”
I’
m wor
ri
ednowIhopenot
hingwi
l
l
happent
oyouguy
s”
“
Wet
rustuncl
eK”
“
Lookmybabyl
etmegetbackt
owor
k
af
terwor
kIwi
l
ldr
ivet
oseey
out
her
e
okay
”
“
Okay
”
“
Kissmyangel
facef
orme”
“
Iwi
l
ldo”
“
Lov
eyou”
”
lov
eyoumor
e”Ihangupandpr
epar
e
somet
hingf
ormy
sel
fanddaught
ert
o
eat
.Mom andherhusbandwi
l
lmake
somet
hingf
ort
hemsel
veswhent
heyar
e
donef
ucki
nngl
i
ker
abbi
ts.I
t’
sbeen
hour
ssi
ncet
heyl
ockedt
hemsel
vesi
n
t
hest
udyr
oom.OnceI
’
m doneIt
aket
he
f
oodandj
uiceandj
oinmydaught
eri
n
t
hel
i
vingr
oom who’
swat
chi
ngcar
toons.
“
Moonl
i
ght
”Shedoesn’
trepl
ymeIknow
she’
sli
ket
hatwhenshe’
sconcent
rat
ing
onhercar
toons
“
Kamar
ia!
”
“
EishMuuj
i
zauy
angi
phaz
ami
say
az!
”
(
EishMuuj
i
zay
ouar
edi
stur
bingme)
“
Ngi
zokushay
aphel
ahawu!
”(Iwi
l
lIbeat
y
ouup)
“
Samahani
mamay
angumz
uri
”(I
’
m
sor
rymybeaut
if
ulmot
her
)Ichuckl
e
“
Hapani
chakul
achako”(
Her
e’sy
our
f
ood)
“
Asant
esanamama”(
Thanky
ouso
muchmommy
)shet
akesherf
ood.The
t
wor
abbi
tsmakest
hei
rwayi
ngi
ggl
i
ng.
“
Iwi
l
lfet
chy
out
henwewi
l
lgot
oyour
houseandf
etchsomeofy
ourcl
othes”
“
Okay
”
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ngmal
umeK”
“
Gotsomet
hingst
osor
tout
Maf
ungwasewami
”
“
Ohpl
easecomebackwi
thEmi
hleI
mi
ssher
”
“
Okay
..
ngi
yani
thanda­ngenhl
i
ziy
oyami
y
onke”
“
Wel
ovey
out
oo”
“
Bye”Hewal
ksout
“
Wher
e’smyf
ood”
“
Makot
iamabhodweakul
i
ndi
l
e”(
Makot
i
t
hepot
sar
ewai
ti
ngf
ory
ou)Isay
gi
ggl
i
ng
“
Mxmy
azwenangi
swel
aumgodi
wokukl
ahl
a”Il
augh
“
Mom whenar
eyouanduncl
eKget
ti
ng
mar
ri
ed”
“
Wehav
en’
tdeci
dedt
her
e’sal
otgoi
ng
onr
ightnow”shesay
ssi
tt
ingnex
ttome
andt
akesmyf
ood
“
Maa!
”
“
Gomakey
our
sI’
m hungr
y”
“
Youar
esuchabul
l
yyouknowt
hat
”She
l
aughs.I
t’
smustbeen2i
fnot3hour
s
l
aterwhenmom r
ecei
vesacal
lthat
makesherscr
eam i
nangui
sh.
“
Mom what
’sgoi
ngon”Iaskpani
cki
ng
“
Khuz
ani
wasi
nvol
vedi
nanacci
dent
andi
tdoesn’
tsoundgoodwehav
etogo
t
othehospi
tal
”

Idon’
tknowwhatdi
dmydol
l
facedot
o
meshegotmehy
pnot
ized,
so
mesmer
izedIcan’
tev
enconcent
rat
e.I
can’
twai
ttof
ini
sht
hisshootandgosee
her
.
“
Wel
ldoneguy
sthatwhatI
’
mtal
ki
ng
about
!Lwandl
eI’
mver
yimpr
essed.Your
nev
erceaset
oamaz
eme!
”
“
Thanky
ousomuchma’
am”Ismi
l
e
wi
del
y.
“
Let
’scal
li
taday
.Y’
al
lhav
eagood
ev
eni
ng!Lwandl
eawor
d”
“
Iwi
l
lwai
tfory
ouout
sidel
overboy
”
Nossay
sandki
ssest
hecor
nerofmyl
i
p
t
henwal
ksout
.If
oll
owMr
sBucki
ngham
t
oherof
fi
ce.
“
Yesma’
am”
“
Closet
hedoor
”Idoasshesay
sand
wal
ktoherdesk
“
Youknowy
ouoneofmyf
avor
it
eact
ors.
Yourt
alenti
smi
ndbl
owi
ng.
”
“
Thanky
ousomuchMr
sBucki
ngham”
“
Afr
iendofmi
nei
sfr
iendswi
thTy
ler
Per
ryandshet
oldmet
hathe’
swor
king
onSout
hAf
ri
canl
eadmal
echar
act
er
ser
ies,
Ithoughtofy
ou”Il
aughbutst
op
whenInot
icet
hatshe’
sser
ious
“
Youar
enotj
oki
ngr
ight
?”
“
NoI
m notsoIhadaskedheri
fshe
coul
dsetupameet
ingf
ormewi
thhi
m
andsheagr
eed.Iwant
edt
otal
ktoy
ou
f
ir
stbef
oreIgot
oAmer
icaandscor
eus
adeal
”Im st
unnedt
ospeak
“
YhooMr
sBucki
ngham t
hisi
shuge”
“
Yesi
tishugeandbi
gfory
ourcar
eer
Lwandl
e.Suchoppor
tuni
ti
esdon’
tcome
easi
l
y,y
ouhav
etogr
abt
hem wi
thbot
h
hands”Yhoo!
“
Iheary
oubutwhyme?
”
“
Yourt
alenti
sbey
ondmeasur
es
Lwandl
eandy
oumeetTy
lerPer
ry’
s
cr
it
eri
aoft
hechar
act
er.
”Ohwow!
“
Iknowi
t’
sal
otsoIwi
l
lgi
vey
out
imet
o
t
hinkabouti
tbutdon’
ttaket
ool
ong,
I
hav
etocal
lmyf
ri
endt
osetmeupa
meet
ing”Ihav
eal
way
sknownt
hatt
his
womanbel
i
evei
nmebutt
his,
thi
sis
wow!I
t’
sahugeoppor
tuni
tyt
hatcomes
oncei
nal
i
fet
ime,
let
'snotf
orgett
hat
I
’
m newi
nthi
sindust
ryandhav
ingt
o
pl
ayabi
grol
eofTy
lerPer
ry’
sser
iest
hat
woul
dbespect
acul
ar!Butt
hiswi
l
lbr
eak
mydol
l
face’
shear
t,wi
l
lIbeabl
etol
i
ve
t
housandsmi
l
esawayf
rom herandour
daught
erf
ormont
hs?Nowt
hisi
sa
f
uckedupdi
l
emma!
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayMar
iaSet
ji
e
CandyGal

CHAPTER65

Thest
atet
hatmymom l
efther
ein,
I'
m
r
eal
l
ypr
ayi
ngt
hatshemakesi
ttot
he
hospi
tal
saf
ely
.Ihopeuncl
eKi
snot
badl
yinj
ured,
mymom won’
tsur
viv
eif
t
heunt
hinkabl
ecoul
dhappent
ohi
m.I
hav
ewi
tnessedhowmuchshel
oves
hi
m andInev
ert
houghtshecoul
d
possi
blyl
oveamanaf
tert
hepai
n
Khumal
oputhert
hrough.I
’
m sur
eat
somepoi
ntshewasscar
edt
hatuncl
eK
wi
l
ltr
eatherl
i
keKhumal
obutsof
ar
uncl
eKhaspr
ovent
obet
hebestman
ev
er.Sof
arhe’
sthemanIwantf
ormy
mot
her
,amant
hatr
eal
l
yador
esherand
woul
dgot
otheendst
omeetmom'
s
needsandt
omakeherhappy
.Hedi
d
notaccept
edheronl
ybutheal
so
accept
edme,
het
reat
smel
i
keI
’
m hi
s
daught
er.Il
ovet
hathet
reat
smel
i
kehi
s
ol
derdaught
erunl
i
kemamawhoIwi
l
l
al
way
sbeababyt
ohernomat
terhow
ol
dIget
.I’
m noti
namoodf
orcooki
ng
soIt
oldLwenkosi
tobr
inguspi
zzaand
hotwi
ngs.
“
Thanky
oubaby
”
“
Wher
ear
eyourpar
ent
sletmest
eal
a
ki
ss”
“
Youdi
dn’
thear
?”
“
Hearwhat
?”
“
Uncl
eKwasi
nvol
vedi
nacaracci
dent
mom wentt
othehospi
tal
”
“
Shi
twhen?
”
“
It
'sbeenanhournowsi
ncemom l
eft
”
“
Ohl
etmecal
lmymom andhearwhat
’s
goi
ng”Hecal
l
shi
smom andt
heyt
alk
t
henhehangsup
“
Howbadi
she”
“
Theyar
est
il
lwai
ti
ng.YhooIhopehe’
s
notbadl
yinj
ured”
“
Met
oohey
”
“
Giv
emet
hatki
sske”hegr
absmybut
t,
pul
l
ingmecl
oserandki
ssesme.
“
Siesmaan!
”Al
i
ttl
evoi
cedi
stur
bsuswe
br
eakt
heki
ssandl
augh.Kamar
iai
s
somet
hingel
seI
’
mtel
l
ingy
ouand
hav
ingSnoi
nherl
i
fei
scont
ri
but
ing.
“
Hel
l
oangel
face”
“
Hel
l
oDaddy
.”Iheart
hem wal
ki
ngaway
soIpr
epar
eourpi
zza,
hotwi
ngsand
j
uicet
henj
oint
hem i
nthel
i
vingr
oom.
“
Howwaswor
kbaby
”
“
It
’swasawesomemyl
ove”
“
That
'sgr
eat
”myphoner
ings.
“
Hel
l
o”
“
HeyMi
ra,
yougood?
”It
’sLee
“
YesI
’
mfi
ney
ou?
”
“
I’
mfi
nebabes,
I’
m ar
oundsoIt
houghtI
shoul
dcomeby“
“
We,
noty
ouLee”IhearLondi
say
ingon
t
heot
hersi
de.
“
Okayy
oucancomeby
,Iwi
l
lsendt
he
coor
dinat
esnow”
“
Okaydar
li
ng”Icanheart
hatshe’
s
dr
unk
“
Mymanagerandmypr
oducerar
eher
e
t
heywantt
ocomeby
”
“
Asi
nnow?
”
“
Yes”
“
Okaynopr
obl
em”
“
Pleasesendt
hem t
hecoor
dinat
esI
needt
hel
oo”Igi
vehi
m myphoneand
got
othebat
hroom t
odomybusi
ness.
OnceI
’
m donewi
thmybusi
nessIwash
myhandsandheadbackt
othel
i
ving
r
oom.
“
Baby
”
“
Yesmyl
ove”
“
Doy
oubel
i
evei
nlongdi
stance
r
elat
ionshi
p?”
“
Whyar
eyouaski
ngt
hat
?”
“
I’
mjustaski
ngbaby
”
“
Asl
ongpeopl
elov
eeachot
her
,the
di
stancei
snot
hing”
“
Eveni
fit
’st
housandsmi
l
esaway
”
“
Yes,
ift
heycanst
ayt
ruet
oeachot
her
.
Ar
eyoupl
anni
ngt
oleav
emeLwenkosi
”
“
NobabyIwi
l
lnev
erl
eav
eyou”
“
Doesmel
i
vingi
nJohannesbur
gand
y
ouher
esomehowaf
fect
ingy
ou?
”
“
Nomyl
ovemosy
oucomebackev
ery
weekendandwhenIwantt
oseey
ouI
candr
ivet
oyouatany
time”
“
Mmm Isee”wehearabuz
zerand
Lwenkosi
att
endsi
t,secondl
aterIhear
t
hem wal
ki
ngi
n.Weshar
epl
easant
ri
es
andt
heyal
socamewi
thLondi
’
ssi
ster
Nosi
mangal
i
sowhohappenst
obe
Lwenkosi
’
s“gi
rl
fr
iend”Iknowi
t’
sal
l
aboutwor
kbutt
hef
actt
hatt
heyar
e
act
ingasacoupl
eeyi
t’
smaki
ngmef
eel
someki
ndaway
.Wechi
l
ltoget
herand
gett
oknowoneanot
her
,theyhav
e
br
oughtsomebooz
e.Mydaught
erf
all
s
asl
eepbef
oreIev
enbat
hher
,Lwenkosi
t
akehert
othebedr
oom andcomes
backt
ojoi
nus.Theconv
ersat
ionkeeps
get
ti
ngl
ouderasal
cohol
get
sint
oour
sy
stem.Iex
cusemy
sel
ftocal
lmama.
“
Baby
”
“
Howi
she”
“
Wear
est
il
lwai
ti
ngbaby
”
“
Whyar
etheyt
aki
ngsol
ong?
”
“
Idon’
tknow”
“
OkayIwi
l
lcal
lyouagai
n”okayatl
east
mom i
snotcomi
ngbacksoonsowe
canst
il
lcont
inuewi
thourchi
l
las.Ij
ump
upasIf
eel
war
m br
eat
heont
hebackof
myneck.
“
Londi
whatt
hef
uck”
“
Yousmel
lheav
enl
y”
“
Thanky
ou”Ipushhi
m he’
stoocl
ose
f
ormyl
i
kingandgot
ojoi
not
her
s.
Mi
nut
esl
aterLondi
joi
nsuswecont
inue
wi
thourdr
inksandconv
ersat
ion.Ican’
t
hel
pbutnot
icehowNosandLwenkosi
ar
esocl
oseatsomepoi
ntt
hey
compl
eteeachot
her
’ssent
ences.We
r
unoutofbooz
eandt
akeuncl
eK’
s
whi
skey
,Lwenkosi
promi
sedt
orepl
ace
i
ttomor
row.Whathappenedaf
tert
hat
i
t’
sabl
ur.

Idon’
tknowhowImadei
ttot
he
hospi
tal
wit
hthet
ear
sthatwer
ebl
i
ndi
ng
mysi
ghtandt
hespeedIwasdr
ivi
ng
wi
th.Ihadt
oleav
emydaught
erandmy
gr
anddaught
erbehi
ndbecauseki
dsar
e
notal
l
owed.Si
tt
ingi
nher
eandwai
ti
ng
f
ort
hef
eedbacki
sdr
ivi
ngmecr
azyand
i
tdoesn’
thel
pthatZoi
sof
fdut
y.
“
Goandf
indoutwhat
’sgoi
ngonZo
pl
ease”Isaywi
pingmyt
ear
sthatcan’
t
st
opf
all
i
ngdownmyf
ace.My
sel
f,Zo
andBheki
hav
ebeenher
ewai
ti
ngf
ora
whi
l
enowbutnoonehascomebackt
o
updat
eusonwhat
’shappeni
ngwi
thmy
husband.
“
OkayI
’
m comi
ng”Sheget
supand
wal
ksaway
,leav
ingmewi
thher
husband.
“
Don’
twor
ryhewi
l
lpul
lthr
ough,
he
sur
viv
edbul
l
etshecansur
viv
ethi
stoo”I
wi
shIcansaywhathe’
ssay
ingi
s
hel
pingbuti
t’
snot
.Theacci
denti
ssai
d
t
obeat
ragi
cacci
dentev
erandhi
scar
i
sunr
ecogni
zabl
e.Theysayhe’
sev
en
l
uckyt
heygothi
m outoft
hecarwi
tha
pul
se.Zocomesbackandsi
tsnex
tto
me
“
Theyar
enotl
ett
ingmei
n,l
et’
swai
t”
“
Buty
ouar
eadoct
orZo,
can’
ttheyl
et
y
oui
nandy
ouwor
kher
e!”
“
I’
m of
fdut
yBongast
opcr
ying,
my
br
otheri
saf
ight
erhewi
l
lbeokay
”Fear
anduncer
tai
ntyi
nherv
oicei
sloudbutI
seet
hatshewantt
obest
rongf
orme.
Shepul
l
smet
oherchestandcomf
ort
s
me.Wef
all
int
osi
l
enceal
l
owi
ngour
mi
ndst
orunawaywi
tht
hought
s.Idon’
t
knowwhatIwoul
dbei
fIwer
etol
ose
hi
m,Idon’
tev
enwantt
othi
nkabouti
t
“
Khuz
ani
Msi
mango”Wegetupr
ighti
n
t
hatmomentandl
ookatt
hedoct
ori
n
ant
ici
pat
ion
“
Cel
ehow’
smybr
other
?”Zosay
swi
tha
shi
ver
ingv
oice.
“
Letmej
ustsayt
hathe’
sal
uckymant
o
makei
toutal
i
ve.Hehasanheadi
njur
y
andbr
okenl
eftl
eg”
“
Howbadi
tis?
”Zoasks
“
Subdur
alhemat
oma…”
“
Ohno!
”Zogaspsast
ear
scascade
downherf
ace
“
What
’si
sthathemomay
akhona?I
she
goi
ngt
obeokay
?Iwantt
oseehi
m”I
say
“
Asubdur
alhemat
omaoccur
swhena
v
einl
ocat
edbeneat
htheskul
lrupt
ures
andst
art
stobl
eed.Thebl
oodcol
l
ect
s
bet
weent
hebr
ainandt
heskul
l
.We
bel
i
evehe’
sgoi
ngt
orecov
erhowev
er
hi
scondi
ti
oni
sver
ycr
it
ical
att
he
momentwehav
eputhi
m onl
i
fe
suppor
t”
“
CanIseehi
m”
“
I’
m sor
…”
“
Please”
“
Iwi
l
lal
l
owonl
yoneper
son”
“
YoucangoBonga,
it’
sfi
ne”Zosay
ssoI
f
oll
owt
hedoct
orashel
eadsmet
o
wher
e’smyhusbandi
s.Tear
scl
oudmy
v
isi
onasIl
aymyey
esonhi
m.Hel
ooks
sopal
eandr
oundi
sh,
hisf
acei
sswol
l
en
andt
hebr
uisesal
lov
erhi
sfaceand
t
her
e’sabandagear
oundhi
shead.The
machi
nesconnect
edonhi
m br
eaksmy
hear
tint
oteensypi
eces.It
akehi
shand
i
ntomi
neandki
ssi
t
“
K..
.i
t’
smeBonga”Iwi
pemyt
ear
swi
th
myot
herhand
“
Idon’
tknowi
fyoucanhearme,
buti
f
y
oucan,
I’
m beggi
ngy
oudon’
tleav
eme.
Iwon’
tbeabl
etosur
viv
ewi
thouty
ou,
I
needy
oubabyourchi
l
drenneedy
ou.
Cel
aul
west
handwasami
,ul
wel
e
ut
handol
wet
hunabant
wanabet
hu
ngi
yakut
usaNgel
engel
e”(
pleasef
ight
myl
ove,
fightf
orourl
oveandour
chi
l
drenI
’
m beggi
ngy
ouNgel
engel
e)
“
Ilov
eyousomuch”Iki
sshi
sbandaged
f
orehead.

Theday
skeeppassi
ngbymyhusband
i
sst
il
li
ncoma.It
hinkI
’
mlosi
ngmy
mi
ndeachdayt
hatpasseswi
thout
seei
nganyi
mpr
ovement
.Thehospi
tal
hasbecomemysecondhome.The
doct
orshav
edoneev
ery
thi
ngt
heycoul
d,
al
lthati
slef
tisf
orhi
mtowakeupbut
he’
snotwaki
ngup.I
’
mtr
yingt
obe
st
rongf
ort
heki
dsbutI
’
mfai
l
ing.Emi
hle
i
sacr
yingmess,
shehasn’
tbeent
o
school
eversi
ncet
heacci
dent
.Then
t
her
e’sKhuz
ani
’
smot
herwho’
sbl
ami
ng
mef
ort
heacci
dent
.Idon’
tknowhow
anyoft
hisi
smyf
aul
t.Ihav
en’
tseen
Khumal
o’sbr
otherev
ersi
ncet
hatday
buthe’
sthel
eastofmywor
ri
esr
ight
now.Al
lIwanti
sformydaddyKt
o
comebackt
ome.
“
Khuz
ani
awuv
ukephel
ahawu!You
can’
tdot
hist
ome!Youcan’
tmakeme
f
all
inl
ovewi
thy
ouandj
ustl
eav
eme
l
i
ket
hat
!AngekeKhuz
ani
uyangi
zwa!
”I
wi
pemyt
ear
sandt
akeahugebr
eat
he
“
OkayI
’
m sor
ryf
orshout
ingaty
ou,
ngi
yax
oli
say
ezwa,
pleasewakeup
Ngel
engel
ewami
ngi
yakukhumbul
a”(
I
mi
ssy
ou)Thedoorswi
ngsopenandZo
makesherwayi
n
“
Heysi
s”
“
HeyZo”shehasbeenv
eryst
rong.
“
Youneedsomer
estBonga.Gohome
andr
estabi
tthencomeback.
”
“
I’
mfi
neher
e”
“
Bongapl
ease…”
“
Hay
imaanZoangi
shongi
yashoukut
hi
ngi
ri
ght
!”(
Isai
dI’
m okay
!)Isi
gh
“
I’
m sor
ry,
Idi
dn’
tmeant
oshoutIj
ust
…”
Ibur
sti
ntot
ear
s
“
Iunder
standsi
si,
pleasedon’
tcr
yhe
wi
l
lpul
lthr
ough”shesay
scomf
ort
ing
me
“
I’
m scar
edZo,
whati
fhenev
erwakes
up?Whati
fhel
eav
esme?
”
“
Heydon’
tsayt
hatpl
ease,
hewon’
t
l
eav
eyou.Hewi
l
lcomebackt
ous”
“
May
behi
smom i
sri
ght
,thi
sisal
lmy
f
aul
t”
“
Hai
sukauy
ahl
any
aloy
amama,
it’
snot
y
ourf
aul
tBonga.I
twasanacci
dentt
hat
coul
dhav
ehappenedt
oany
one”
“
It
’smeZo,
Ihav
ebadl
uckandnowI
’
m
dr
aggi
ngt
hepeopl
ecl
oset
omeandI
l
oveal
ong.
”
“
Bonga…”
“
It
’st
rueZoI
fhedi
es,
Iwi
l
lnev
erf
orgi
ve
my
sel
f.Ineedt
odot
hingsr
ightIhav
e
t
ogot
oMaMdl
uli
”Ipul
lbackf
rom her
embr
ace
“
Who’
sthatnow”shesay
swi
pingmy
t
ear
s
“
It
’st
hatwomant
hatf
oundMi
raand
Lwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Ohy
esIr
emember
”
“
Ihav
etogoandsor
tev
ery
thi
ngout
may
bet
hiswasj
ustt
hebegi
nni
ng,
the
wor
sti
sst
il
lcomi
ng.Ihav
etodo
somet
hingbef
oremydaught
erget
shur
t
t
oo.
”
“
OkayIwi
l
lcomewi
thy
ou”
“
Noy
oudon’
thav
eto”
“
Iwantt
oBonga,
youhav
en’
tbeen
sl
eepi
ngf
orday
s,y
ouar
eal
way
sher
e
andnoteat
ingwel
l
,howcanIal
l
owy
ou
t
odr
ivei
nthatst
ateespeci
all
yal
ong
di
stance.
”
“
OhZo,
yousuchanangel
sentf
rom
abov
e”
“
That
'swhatsi
ster
’sdof
oreachot
her
sost
opi
t”Ismi
l
efai
ntl
y.
“
Sowhenar
ewel
eav
ing”
“
Tomor
rowmor
ning”
“
Okay
,pl
easegohomet
odayandhav
e
r
est
,Khuz
ani
woul
dn’
twanty
out
o
abusey
our
sel
fli
ket
his.
”
“
OkayIwi
l
l”
“
Iwi
l
lcomecheckony
oui
fIf
indy
ou
her
eIwi
l
lki
cky
ourass”Igi
ggl
e
“
Don’
twor
ryIwi
l
lgohome,
letmej
ust
spendf
ewmor
ehour
swi
thhi
m”
“
Letmegoandcar
ryonwi
thmy
r
ounds.
”Inodt
henshewal
ksoutaf
ter
ki
ssi
ngherbr
other
’sf
orehead.Il
ookat
myhusbandi
nfr
ontofmeandsi
gh
heav
il
y.Thedayhehadanacci
denthe
madesweetl
ovet
ome,
conf
essnghi
s
undy
ingl
ovef
orme.I
t’
swasso
beaut
if
ul,
thel
evel
ofconnect
ionwasso
deepandi
ntense.Wewer
esweat
ing,
moani
ng,
tear
ingup,
ourbodi
esmov
ing
t
othet
uneofourl
ove.Ir
efuset
o
bel
i
evet
hathewasmaki
ngl
ovet
ome
f
ort
hel
astt
ime.Thedooropens,
my
daught
erwal
ksi
nwi
thaKFCpaperbag
ont
heot
herhand.
“
Baby
”
“
Iknowy
ouhav
en’
teat
ent
oday
,I
t
houghtIshoul
dcomebyandy
ouneed
somest
rengt
hmama”I
’
m nothungr
y
butIknowshewoul
dn’
ttakenof
oran
answer
.
“
Yousuchadar
li
ng,
thanky
oumybaby
”
It
aket
hepaperbagf
rom her
.
“
Howi
shet
oday
?”
“
Ther
e’snochange”
“
Hewi
l
lwakeupmama,
Iknowhewi
l
l.
Themanl
ovesy
ousomucht
ojustgi
ve
upl
i
ket
hat
”
“
IhopesobabyIr
eal
l
yhopeso.
.howar
e
t
heki
ds”
“
I’
mtaki
ngt
hem t
oShakawor
ld,
justt
o
cheerupEmi
hleabi
t”Idon’
tknowwhat
Iwoul
dhav
edonewi
thoutwi
thoutMi
ra.
Shehasbeent
aki
nggoodcar
eof
Emi
hlewhodoesn’
twanther
gr
andmot
her
.
Theygetal
ongv
erywel
landI
’
m so
happy
.
“
Thanky
ousomuchmybaby
,Idon’
t
knowwhatIwoul
ddowi
thouty
ou.I
coul
dn’
thav
easkedf
orabet
ter
daught
er.Sukhul
i
key
az”Shegi
ggl
es
“
Argst
opi
tMom”
“
Real
l
ybaby
”Shehasgr
owni
ndeedand
I
’
m apr
oudmot
her
.Feel
sli
kei
twasj
ust
y
est
erdaywhenIhel
dheri
nmyar
ms.
“
Ihopey
ouwi
l
lst
opt
reat
ingmel
i
kea
baby
”
“
Youwi
l
lal
way
sbemybaby
,ev
eni
fyou
getmar
ri
edandhav
e10ki
ds,
greyhai
r
y
ouwi
l
lst
il
lbemybaby
”shechuckl
es
“
10ki
dsnev
er!I
’
mfi
newi
thKamar
ia”
“
Ican’
thav
eonedaught
erandy
ouhav
e
onedaught
ert
oo.Iwantmany
gr
andchi
l
dren”
“
I’
m sor
ryt
odi
sappoi
nty
oumom.Iai
n’
t
hav
ingachi
l
dev
eragai
nnotnownot
ev
er!
”
“
Wear
enotf
ight
ing,
whyar
eyour
aisi
ng
y
ourv
oiceatmenow”shet
akesahuge
br
eat
he
“
I’
m sor
rymom”
“
What
’swr
ongbaby
”
“
Not
hing”
“
Mir
apl
ease”
“
Idon’
twantki
dsany
mor
emama.
”
“
Yes,
fornowi
t’
sunder
standabl
e.You
st
il
lhav
eal
ott
oli
vef
or,
atl
aterst
age
t
hen”sheshakesherheadno
“
Noev
enatt
hel
aterst
age”okaynow
I
’
m wor
ri
ed
“
Why
,ifImayask”
“
Mypsy
chol
ogi
stsay
sIhav
e
t
okophobi
a”
“
Whati
sthat
?”
“
It
’saf
earofpr
egnancyandgi
vi
ngbi
rt
h
causedbypr
evi
oust
raumat
icpr
egnancy
orchi
l
dbi
rt
h.Mom Ihav
etogoLwenkosi
i
swai
ti
ngf
ormewi
tht
heki
ds”she
f
iddl
esf
ormyf
aceandki
ssesmyl
i
ps
t
henheadsout
,leav
ingmef
eel
i
ng
hor
ri
ble.Ineedt
osor
tthi
sout
,mybaby
hasbeent
hroughal
ot.Shedeser
ves
happi
nessnowi
nfactshenev
erdeser
ve
anyoft
his.

Thenex
tmor
ningZoandIar
eont
he
wayt
oGaut
eng.She’
stheonedr
ivi
ngof
cour
se.
“
Irecei
vedacal
lfr
om Cabal
astni
ght
”
“
Howi
sshe?
”
“
Shet
ookouradv
iceandi
twor
kedshe’
s
8weekspr
egnant
”
“
Ohmyt
hat
’swonder
ful
,I
’m sohappy
f
orher
”
“
Met
ooshedeser
vest
hisbabyshame”
“
Andshe’
sagr
eatmot
her
.”
“
Youknowi
t’
ssuchapi
tyt
hatt
her
ear
e
somewomenwhocan’
tconcei
veand
t
heywantsobadl
ytohav
echi
l
dren
whi
l
ether
e'sal
sowomenl
i
keMi
rawho
hav
etokosomet
hing”
“
Tokophobi
a?”
“
Yesshesai
dherpsy
chol
ogi
stsai
dshe
hast
okowhatwhat
”
“
PoorMi
racl
e,she’
sbeenat
hroughal
ot
atsuchay
oungage.Ir
eal
l
yhopeshe
ov
ercomet
hatf
ear
.somewoment
akes
y
ear
stoov
ercomet
hef
earofhav
ing
chi
l
drenagai
n”
“
It
’sal
lmyf
aul
t…”
“
Hay
iBongast
opsay
ingt
hatmaan.
”
“
Ican’
thel
pitZo”
“
Youar
efi
xi
ngi
tnow”Idi
recthert
o
MaMndl
uli
’
shouse,
Ist
il
lremember
.
Oneofhert
hwasaswel
comeusand
l
eadust
othel
i
vingr
oom.
“
Iwi
l
lgocal
lher
”weset
tl
eont
hecouch,
af
ewsecondsl
atershewal
ksi
n
“
Kadengi
nil
i
ndi
l
ewoz
ani
ngapha”(
I
hav
ebeenwai
ti
ngf
ory
ou,
comeher
e)
ZoandIl
ookateachot
hert
henf
oll
ow
herasshewal
ksout
,headi
ngt
othehut
.
“
Takeof
fyourshoes”wet
akeof
four
heel
sandgeti
nsi
det
hehut
.Wesi
t
downont
hematwhi
l
eshesi
tsont
he
ani
mal
ski
nbef
oreus.
“
Ngaz
il
eukut
hiuz
obuy
a”(
Iknewy
ou
wi
l
lcomeback)
“
Howdi
dyouknowt
hat
?”
“
Howar
eyoumychi
l
dren”
“
Wear
efi
nemakhosi
”ZoandIsay
“
Howar
eyourchi
l
dren”
“
Theyar
efi
ne”
“
Theyar
ever
yst
rongki
ds,
especi
all
y
y
oursonZol
eka.Your
aisedaf
iney
oung
manr
ightt
her
e”
“
Uhm t
hanky
oumakhosi
”
“
HowcanIhel
pyouNokubonga”Idon’
t
r
emembert
ell
i
ngt
hiswomanournames.
“
Iwantt
odot
hingsr
ightmakhosi
”
“
Isee,
fir
stofal
lyouneedt
ost
opusi
ng
y
ourl
atehusband’
ssur
name.Your
mar
ri
agei
snotr
ecogni
zedbyt
he
ancest
ors.Kwakonal
okhonj
ekubanga
ul
akakwabaphansi
.”(
Event
hati
t’
s
cr
eat
ingangeront
heancest
ors)
“
Iheary
ouMakhosi
”
“
Theny
ouhav
etogobackhomeand
t
alkt
hingst
hroughwi
thy
ourf
ather
.
Makepeacewi
thhi
m,t
heny
ouwi
l
ldoa
cer
emonyt
oappeaseandaskf
or
f
orgi
venesst
oyoursi
sterbutIwi
l
lhav
e
t
obet
her
etogui
dey
out
hroughoutt
he
whol
ecer
emony
”
“
Okay
”
“
Yourdaught
erhast
other
eal
soont
he
dayoft
hecer
emony
.Ihav
etocl
eanse
bot
hofy
ou”
“
Yebomakhosi
sowhati
fmydad
doesn’
tacceptmyapol
ogy
”
“
Yourf
atheri
sdy
ingt
oreuni
tewi
thhi
s
daught
eragai
n”
“
OhIseesohowmuchi
t’
sgoi
ngt
o
cost
”
“
What
every
ouwantt
ogi
veme,
it’
sokay
.
Cal
lmeoncey
ouar
edonewi
thy
our
f
athert
henIwi
l
ltel
lyouev
ery
thi
ngt
hat
y
ouneedt
ogetf
ort
hecer
emony
”Inod
andt
aket
hebusi
nesscar
d.Idi
dn’
t
knowt
hesangomashav
ebusi
nesscar
d.
“
Thi
sti
mey
ouhav
etodot
hingsr
ight
accor
dingt
oourcust
omsandcul
tur
e,
wheny
ougetmar
ri
edi
fyouwi
l
lev
enget
mar
ri
ed”
“
Whatdoest
hatmeanmakhosi
,i
smy
husbandgoi
ngt
odi
e?”
“
Idon’
tknowmychi
l
donl
yGodknows
butwhatIknowi
sthaty
ourl
ovei
sbei
ng
t
est
ed.I
sitst
rongenought
osur
viv
e
agai
nstal
lodds?Idon’
tknow”
“
Pleaseenl
i
ght
enmemakhosi
whatt
est
?
Ar
ewei
ndanger
?”
“
Seni
ngakhul
ulekamanj
esi
siqedi
l
e”
(
Youcanl
eav
enowwear
efi
nish)
“
Makhosi
pleasedon’
tdot
hist
ome”I
saydesper
atel
ybutshe’
snotpr
epar
ed
t
otel
lme.
“
Zol
ekaubokeut
hat
heumny
eni
wakho
uy
omphal
azi
sa.
”
“
Ohuhm ngabeumakhosi
ukushi
soy
ini
l
okho”(
whyi
smakhosi
say
ingt
hat
)Zo
asks
“
Unedl
i
soaf
akwal
onauni
naemv
a
kokushonakomny
eni
wakhe.I
nhl
oso
y
akhekawukut
hiakushi
yewena
nabant
wanabenuanakey
enaf
uthi
asebenz
eley
enaakhohl
wenj
eumndeni
wakhekodwakei
dli
soaz
angel
i
sebenz
e
ngent
andoy
akhel
amenz
awaphenduka
umunt
uongamaz
i.”(
Hismot
herhashi
m
underherspel
l
,heri
ntent
ionswer
efor
hi
mtol
eav
eyouandy
ourchi
l
drenand
onl
yfocusonher
.Shewant
edhi
mfor
her
sel
fonl
ybutt
hespel
ldi
dn’
twor
k
accor
dingt
oherwi
shesi
nst
eady
our
husbandt
urnedi
ntoaper
sony
ou
coul
dn’
trecogni
ze)
“
Wowl
omf
azi
ubol
i
lebo!
”(t
hatwoman
i
scr
uel
!)Isay
“
Wowwhatki
ndofamot
hert
hatdoes
t
hatt
oherson!
”Zosay
scl
ear
lyshocked
aboutwhatt
hesangomaj
ustsai
d
“
Nowi
t’
smakessensewhyBheki
changedaf
tert
hel
ossofhi
sfat
her
.I
t
houghthewasgr
iev
ingi
nawr
ongway
buthewasbei
ngcont
rol
l
edbywhatt
hat
womandi
dtohi
m!”
“
Shehasnev
erl
ovedy
out
hat
’snol
i
e
butwhenshel
ostherhusbandshef
elt
l
i
keshewasl
osi
ngev
ery
thi
ngsoshedi
d
somet
hingt
okeephersont
oher
sel
f
onl
ybuti
tbackf
ir
ed”
“
Myhusbandwon’
tbel
i
evemei
fIt
ell
hi
mthi
s,hel
oveshi
smot
her
.It
hink
ev
ent
hought
hespel
ldi
dn’
twor
k
accor
dingt
omymot
her
sinl
awpl
anbut
somehowi
thasani
mpactonhowBheki
wor
shi
psher
”
“
That
’sr
ightdontwor
ryev
ery
thi
ngwi
l
l
r
eveal
itsel
foneday
.Whaty
ouneedt
o
doi
stol
i
ftt
hatspel
l
.”
“
Howam Igoi
ngt
odot
hatwi
thout
t
ell
i
nghi
m”
“
Iwi
l
lgi
vey
ousomet
hing,
pouri
tinhi
s
dr
ink,
hewi
l
lvomi
tev
ery
thi
ngwi
thi
n30
mi
nut
es.Don’
tgi
vehi
m whenhehas
eat
enany
thi
ng.I
thast
obet
hemor
ning
whenhehasn’
teat
enany
thi
ng”she
gi
vesZoal
i
ttl
ebot
tl
ethathassome
br
ownl
i
qui
daf
tert
hatwel
eav
e.We
st
artatt
her
est
aur
antf
ir
stt
oeat
,wear
e
st
arv
ing.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
hiswomanBonga!
”
“
She’
scr
uel
shamekant
ibanj
ani
l
abomama”ourf
oodanddr
inksar
ri
ved
t
henwedagi
n.
“
SoIwentt
hroughal
loft
hatpai
n
becauseoft
hatwoman?
”Shebl
i
nksher
t
ear
sback
“
I’
m sor
ryZo,
kar
mawi
l
ldeal
wit
hheror
wemi
ghtaswel
lgi
veherr
atposi
onaf
e”
wel
augh.
I
’
m gl
adIwasabl
etomakeherl
augh,
she’
sbeenv
eryemot
ional
sincewe
wal
kedoutoft
hathouse.
“
Thebl
ackonei
t’
sver
yfastandqui
ckl
y”
sheadds
“
Wecanev
enpouri
tonmymot
heri
n
l
aw'
stea,
wewi
l
lbur
ythem ont
hesame
day
.”Wegi
ggl
e
“
Weneedt
opr
act
icehowwewi
l
lcr
y”
shesay
s
“
Yeswhent
heyt
hei
rcasket
sar
e
l
ower
edt
othegr
oundwewi
l
lcr
yli
ke
cr
azywomenandat
temptt
othr
ow
our
sel
vesi
nthei
rhol
e.Ohkodwamama
ungi
shi
yel
ani
”Imi
micacr
yingv
oiceon
t
hel
astsent
ence,
webur
sti
ntol
aught
er.
“
Idon’
tknowhowIwi
l
lbeabl
etokeep
t
hisf
rom myhusbandBonga.Thi
sis
huge”
“
Youneedt
otr
yZo”shehuf
fs
“
Anot
hert
hingi
showwi
l
lIgi
vehi
mthi
s
t
hingbef
orehehaseat
ensomet
hing.
Bheki
isnotonet
odr
inkt
eadr
inki
ng
bef
orebr
eakf
ast
.Thef
ir
stt
hinghe
want
swhenhewakesupi
sreal
food”
“
Youwi
l
lmakeapl
an,
Iknowy
ouwi
l
l.
Cany
oucal
li
sishel
isakhoandf
indout
howKdoi
ngt
oday
”shel
aughsand
t
akesherphonet
ocal
lDrCel
ewhoi
s
K’
sdoct
or
“
Zoks”Shehasputhi
m onl
oudspeaker
“
HeyDrCel
e,howar
eyou”
“
I’
m wel
lZoks,
howar
eyou”
“
I’
m al
sof
ine,
how’
smybr
otherdoi
ng
t
oday
?”
“
I’
m af
rai
dhe’
sst
il
lthesame.I
'
m sor
ry”
myhear
tsi
nks
“
It
’sokayt
hanky
ou”
“
Don’
tment
ioni
t,i
fyouneedany
thi
ng
j
ustshoutokay
”
“
Thanky
ousomuchDrCel
e”
“
Hav
eagr
eatdayZoks”
“
Bye”shehangsup
“
Khuz
ani
needst
owakeup,
hecan’
tdo
t
hist
ome”
“
Hewi
l
l”
“
Ihav
elostmyappet
it
enowl
et’
sgeta
t
akeawayandl
eav
eZoks”Wel
augh.
Sheget
sthet
akeawayt
henwel
eav
e.
I
’
mtheonewho’
sdr
ivi
ngnow.I
t’
s
ar
ound9pm whenwear
ri
ve.
“
Thanky
ousomuch,
Iwi
l
lseey
ou
t
omor
rowatt
hehospi
tal
.Iwi
l
lst
artat
t
hehospi
tal
toseeKhuz
ani
thendr
ivet
o
edumbe”
“
OkayIl
ovey
ou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”
If
indMi
ra,
Kamar
iaandEmi
hleal
ready
sl
eepsoIgot
omyr
oom andsl
eep.

Thenex
tmor
ning,
Iwoket
hegi
rl
sup
ear
lyi
nthemor
ningandi
nfor
medt
hem
aboutt
hej
our
neyt
oeDumbe.
“
I’
m al
sogoi
ngmommyr
ight
?”Emi
hle
asks.I
’
m notsur
eifi
twi
l
lbeagoodi
dea.
YazumakaKhuz
ani
uzongi
bangel
a
i
dramanj
e.
“
Uhm wewi
l
lgoasky
ourgr
andmot
her
f
ir
st”shenods.Wear
eal
lpackedand
r
eadyt
ogoev
enourl
uggagesar
e
l
oaded
”
Yout
ookev
ery
thi
ngbaby
?”
”
Yesmommy
”Mi
rar
epl
i
es,
Ist
artat
Khuz
ani
’
smom’
spl
ace,
sheopenst
he
doorf
ormeandsay
snot
hing.Imake
mywayi
nwi
tht
hegi
rl
s
”
SawubonaMa”(
greet
ingsmom)
“
Iwaswonder
ingwhenar
eyoubr
ingi
ng
mygr
anddaught
erbackory
ouneeded
somemor
eti
met
opoi
sonheragai
nst
me”l
ordpl
easehel
pme.
“
ChaIj
ustcamet
oasky
out
ogowi
th
her
.I’
mleav
ingf
orPaul
Piet
ersbur
g”
“
Akay
ilapho!
”(she’
snotgoi
ng
any
wher
e!)
“
Gogopl
ease”Emi
hlebegsher
gr
andmot
her
“
Hay
iEmi
hley
ouar
enotgoi
ng!
”
“
Daddywoul
dhav
eal
l
owedmeGogo”
“
Isai
dyouar
enotgoi
ngandt
hat
’s
f
inal
!”
“
Arghwhyy
oumaki
ngmyl
i
feal
i
ving
hel
l
!”Say
sEmi
hle
“
Emyr
espect
,she’
syourgr
andmot
her
,
she’
sal
soy
ourel
der
!”
“
Butmommy
…”Il
ookather
,shest
ops,
herey
esgl
i
stenwi
tht
ear
sthensher
uns
away
.
“
Kodwamamawewi
l
lbegonef
or4
day
sonl
y”
“
Mysoni
sfi
ght
ingf
orhi
sli
fewenay
ou
ar
egoi
ngf
orat
ri
pfor4day
sbuty
ou
cl
aimt
olov
ehi
m!”
“
It
’snotat
ri
p,Ihav
etogoi
t’
sver
y
i
mpor
tant
”
“
Mxmy
oucanf
ool
mysonbutnotme!
”
Shewal
ksawayl
eav
ingmef
umi
ngwi
th
anger
.Thi
swomanoneoft
heseday
sI
wi
l
llosei
tst
runasi
.
“
Wuuuwehav
eLwenkosi
’
sgr
annyno2
her
e”mydaught
ersay
s
“
Argl
et’
sleav
e”
“
Emyi
snotgoi
ngmama?
”Kamar
iasay
s
“
Nobaby
”Weheadout
.Wepassbyt
he
hospi
tal
toseeKf
orf
ewmi
nut
esand
hav
eal
i
ttl
echatwi
thZot
henhi
tthe
r
oad.Thedr
ivei
slongbutt
hegi
rl
sar
e
keepi
ngmeent
ert
ained.I
t’
sfunnyt
hat
af
teral
lthesey
ear
sIst
il
lknowmyway
home.It
akeahugebr
eat
heasIpul
l
ov
eratt
hegat
e.Dumbewi
l
lnev
er
change,
it’
sst
il
lthewayIl
efti
t.
“
Wear
eher
ebabi
es”wegetoutoft
he
carandIhol
dthem i
nmyhandsaswe
makeourwayi
nthey
ard.Thechi
ckens
ar
esquawki
ngandr
oami
ng
ar
oundt
hey
ardanddogsar
ebar
kingas
t
heyseeus.Oneoft
heki
dst
hatar
e
pl
ayi
ngr
unsi
nsi
det
hehouse,
I’
m sur
e
t
otel
lthem t
hatt
her
ear
evi
sit
ors.A
mi
nut
elat
ermymom appear
s
“
Nono!
”Shescr
eamswi
thshockasshe
seesus
“
Sawubonamama”
“
Ohmt
anami
”shehugsmet
ight
lyi
nher
ar
ms
“
I’
m sohappyt
oseey
ouNono”
“
I’
m happyt
oseey
out
oomama”shel
et
goofmeandhugsMi
raandKamar
ia.
Ev
ery
onenowi
sout
sidel
ooki
ngatus.
Theyhav
ebecomesuchahugef
ami
l
y
nowt
her
ear
eev
enf
ewf
acest
hatIhav
e
nev
erseen.Iseehi
m pushi
nghi
msel
f
t
owar
dsuswi
thhi
swheel
chai
r.If
eel
t
ear
sbur
ningi
nmyey
es.He’
sst
il
lthe
samei
t’
sjustt
hathe’
shasagednow,
I
t
hinkmor
ethenhi
sage
“
No.
.no.
.Nokubongamt
anami
”Dadsay
s
shockwr
it
tenal
lov
erhi
sface
“
Sawubonababa”(
Greet
ingsdad)
“
Ohmt
anami
”Hehol
dsmyhands
pul
l
ingmecl
osert
oreachhi
slev
el
“
Wuwel
onodadakaz
iyami
”(Thi
sisy
ou
mydaught
er?
)Hecupsmyf
aceand
l
ooksatwi
thmewi
tht
ear
sinhi
sey
es
bef
oreembr
aci
ngme
“
Ehbaba”
“
IthoughtIwi
l
lnev
erseey
ouagai
n,my
chi
l
dI’
m sosor
ry”hecr
ies,
Inev
er
t
houghtt
hisdaywi
l
lcomewher
eIsee
myf
athercr
ying.
“
Asi
ngeneni
endl
i
ni”(
let
’sgeti
nthe
house)wewal
kinsi
det
hehouseandI
i
ntr
oducemydaught
erandmy
gr
anddaught
erandI
’
m al
soi
ntr
oduced
t
omybr
other
’schi
l
drenandmysi
ster
Si
bongi
l
e,who’
sthel
astbor
n.Ev
ery
one
seemst
obehappyt
oseemeespeci
all
y
myf
ather
.
“
Sibongi
l
ekhandel
ausi
swakho
nabaz
ukul
ubami
iti
ye”Dadsay
s.The
secondwi
fewal
ksi
nandl
ooksatme
wi
thsomuchhat
e
“
Ithoughtt
heki
dsar
ejoki
ng,
it’
sreal
l
y
y
ou?Mt
himkhul
uhowcany
oual
l
owt
his
sl
utt
ocomeher
e?”
“
Dor
isawume,
Bongai
smydaught
er
shewasnev
ersupposedt
ogoi
nthe
f
ir
stpl
ace!Thi
sisherhomet
oo”wow
di
dhej
ustst
andupf
ormet
ohi
s
pr
eci
ouswi
fe.Thi
sfeel
ssosur
real
.
“
Sheki
l
ledourdaught
er!Shehast
ogo!
”
“
Yeydon’
trai
sey
ourv
oiceatme!Bonga
i
sgoi
ngnowher
e,i
fyouar
enothappy
t
henl
eav
enow!
”Shewal
ksoutcr
ying.I
can’
tbel
i
evet
hisi
smyf
ather
.
Wheel
chai
ryaz
enz
aiz
imangamos.The
t
eaandbakedbr
eadi
sbr
oughtt
ous.I
can’
trememberwhenwast
hel
astt
imeI
at
eabakedbr
ead.
“
Youst
il
lmakebakedbr
eadmama,
it’
s
soy
ummy
”
“
Itwasmadebymesi
sBonga”
Si
bongi
l
esay
swi
thasmi
l
eonherf
ace,
she’
sbeaut
if
ul.Iwasn’
tex
pect
ingsuch
wel
comi
ngf
rom her
.
“
It
’sv
eryni
ce”
“
Thanky
ou”Ther
estoft
hedaywe
cat
chupandhav
eal
oudconv
ersat
ion
mi
xedwi
thl
aught
er.I
t’
sgoodt
oback
home.Iwi
shmysi
ster
swer
eher
etoo
butI
’
m sur
etheywi
l
lcomef
ort
he
cer
emony
.
“
Thanky
ousomuchf
orcomi
ngmy
chi
l
d”mom say
sandhugsme.Wear
e
al
onei
nthei
rbedr
oom.It
ell
herabout
whatt
hesangomasai
d.Ineedhert
o
t
alkt
odadbutshecal
l
shi
m andwe
di
scussev
ery
thi
ngbet
weent
ear
sand
snor
ts.Heagr
eest
odot
hecer
emony
andsay
shewi
l
lal
sosl
aught
eracowt
o
cel
ebr
atemyr
etur
n.He’
shappyandhe
can’
tev
enhi
dei
t,Icoul
dn’
tbehappi
er.I
i
nfor
m makhosi
andshegi
vesmel
i
stof
t
hingst
hatIneedt
obuyi
ncl
udi
ngagoat
.

Todayi
sFr
iday
,DadandIheadt
otown
t
obuyev
ery
thi
ngt
hati
sneeded.The
cer
emonyi
stomor
row.Mysi
ster
sand
t
hei
rhusbandswi
tht
hei
rchi
l
drenar
e
comi
ngt
oday
.LuckyShakahassome
busi
nesst
oat
tendsohe’
snotcomi
ng,
I
don’
tknowhowIwoul
dhav
ereact
edi
f
hecame.Duduwi
l
lbedr
ivi
ngwi
th
makhosi
,Iaskedhert
obr
ingherf
orme.
“
Yourmot
hert
oldmeaboutev
ery
thi
ng
t
hathappenedi
nyourl
i
fe.I
’
m sosor
ry
mychi
l
d.I
fIwast
her
easy
ourf
ather
not
hingwoul
dhav
ehappenedt
oyou”
“
It
’sf
inedad,
canwegetov
erev
ery
thi
ng
andst
artaf
resh”
“
Thanky
oumychi
l
d”Hesmi
l
esandI
smi
l
eback.
Wear
ri
veathomeandt
hechi
l
drenof
f
l
oadev
ery
thi
ngf
rom t
heboot
.my
si
ster
shav
ear
ri
ved.Icanseet
hei
rcar
s
par
kedi
nthey
ard.Thembi
nkosi
att
acks
mewi
thahugt
hemomentImakemy
wayi
n
“
Sis”
“
But
i”Hehol
dsmef
ordearl
i
fet
henl
et’
s
goofme
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
hisi
syou”Hesay
s
l
ooki
ngatme
“
It
’sbeeny
ear
s”
“
Wel
comebackhomesi
s”
“
Thanky
oubhut
i”Ihugmysi
ster
stoo
andgr
eetmakhosi
fir
stt
hencat
chup
wi
thmysi
ster
sandbr
other
.It
’shear
t
war
mingt
obesur
roundedwi
thmy
whol
efami
l
y.Si
bongi
l
eandMi
raget
al
ongv
erywel
l
,theyar
ethesameage
af
teral
l
.Wewokeupat5am i
nmor
ning
t
ogot
omysi
ster
sgr
ave.Mi
rai
ssul
ki
ng,
shehat
eswaki
ngupear
ly,
ahwel
lshe'
s
gonnahav
etobest
rong.Dadl
i
ght
sthe
i
ncenseandt
wowhi
tecandl
es
“
Nont
ethet
hel
elo,
it’
smey
ourf
ather
.I’
m
wi
thy
oursi
sterNokubonga,
Mir
a,her
daught
erandt
hesangomaMaMdl
uli
.
Yoursi
steri
sher
etoapol
ogi
zef
orwhat
shedi
dtoy
oumt
anami
.Pl
easef
orgi
ve
herf
orev
ery
thi
ng.TodayI
’
mrel
easi
ng
y
ouf
rom t
hehat
redt
haty
ouhav
ebeen
hol
dingt
owar
dsherandherdaught
er.
I
t’
sti
mey
ougoandj
oint
hef
ami
l
ymy
chi
l
d.YobemaMt
hikhul
uay
idl
e
i
zi
shi
yel
e”Thesangomagi
vesmesome
mut
itospr
inkl
eonmysi
ster
sgr
ave
whi
l
etal
ki
ngt
oher
,aski
ngf
orgi
veness.I
sayev
ery
thi
ngf
rom t
hebot
tom ofmy
hear
tandshedsomet
ear
s.Oncewear
e
donewedr
ivet
other
iver
.
“
Undr
essbot
hofy
ou”MaMdl
uli
say
s
“
Buti
t’
sfr
eez
ingmama”Mi
racompl
ains
“
Itwi
l
lbeov
ersoonbaby
”Weundr
ess
andgeti
ntot
her
ivert
henshepour
s
col
dmut
iwi
th20l
i
ter
sbucketonus.
We
gapsast
hecol
dwat
ermakescont
act
wi
thourbodi
es.Wehadbr
oughtr
obes,
wewor
ethem onceshewasdoneand
wal
kedt
othecar
.Thembi
nkosi
issi
tt
ing
nex
ttodadi
nfr
ont
,me,
makhosi
and
Mi
rawho’
sashi
ver
ingmess,
aresi
tt
ing
att
heback.Uy
asheshaukuz
wel
a
amakhaz
aumt
anami
.
“
But
ipl
easet
urnont
heai
rcon,
Mir
ais
shi
ver
ing”
“
Her
e’smyj
acketMi
mi”Dadsay
sand
gi
vesmehi
sjackett
ocov
eruphi
s
gr
anddauht
er.Ihav
enot
icedt
hathehas
asof
tspotf
orMi
ra.Ther
e’snot
imet
o
sl
eepsowhenwegethome,
wepr
epar
e
f
ort
hecer
emony
.Thegoatandcow
wer
esl
aught
eredy
est
erday
.Ev
ery
onei
s
al
lupnowdoi
ngwhat
evert
hatneedst
o
bedone.By11am wear
edonewi
th
pot
sandev
ery
thi
ng,
peopl
ear
eal
ready
comi
ngi
n.If
reshenupabi
t,wear
enot
supposet
obat
hatal
lsi
ncewebat
hed
wi
tht
hemut
i.
“
Sengi
yi
ndl
elamt
anami
”(I
’
mleav
ing)
Thesangomasay
s
“
Thanky
ousosomuchmama,
didmy
si
steraccept
edmyapol
ogy
?”
“
Youwi
l
lseef
ory
our
sel
fifshehas
accept
edy
ourapol
ogyornot
”coul
dit
bepossi
blet
hatal
loft
hiswasi
nvai
n
“
Ofcour
senot
,st
opwor
ryi
ngandenj
oy.
”
It
akeoutt
wohundr
ednot
esandgi
vei
t
t
oher
“
Hai
i
boi
mal
iengaka!
”(Somuchmoney
!)
“
It
’sj
ustR10000mama”
“
Hay
iIcantacceptt
hismoneyi
t’
stoo
much”
“
Yousai
dIwi
l
lgi
vey
ouany
thi
ngso
pl
easet
akemymoney
”shesi
ghsand
t
ell
met
oputi
tdown.Idoasshesay
t
henshet
akesi
t.
“
Thanky
oumychi
l
d”shebi
dsf
arewel
l
t
omypar
ent
sandl
eav
e.Ther
estoft
he
cer
emonygoeswel
l
,youknowwhen
t
her
e’sf
oodandbooz
epeopl
ear
e
happy
.Mybr
otherboughtal
otof
al
cohol
.Af
teral
ongday
,I’
mrel
axi
ng
wi
thmysi
ster
s,t
heyar
ehav
ingwi
ne
whi
l
eI’
m hav
ingmynonal
cohol
i
cdr
ink.
Ical
lZoandaskaboutKandmyhear
t
br
eakst
oheart
hathe’
sst
il
lthesame.I
t
hinkIneedonegl
assofwi
ne.Idon’
t
knowhowandwhendi
dmymot
her
comei
n,j
ustasI
’
m aboutt
odr
inkshe
shout
s
“
Hay
iNono!y
ouhav
ecomeal
ongway
t
ogi
veupnow”
“
Onegl
asswon’
thur
tmama”
“
NoNono”shet
akest
hegl
assandgi
ve
i
ttoNt
ombi
.I’
minav
ergeoft
ear
ssoI
getupandwal
ktot
hebedr
oom.Isi
ton
t
hebedandcr
y.
“
what
’swr
ongmychi
l
d”Mom say
sas
shepul
l
smet
oherar
ms.
“
Khuz
ani
doesn’
twantt
owakeup
mama”
“
Wakeupwher
e?”Ir
emembert
hatI
di
dn’
tIt
ell
hert
hatKhuz
ani
isi
ncoma.I
l
etoutal
oudsob.

-
Meet
ingmymom’
sfami
l
ywasamaz
ing,
t
heyar
esuchl
ovel
ypeopl
eex
cept
mkhul
u’
ssecondwi
fe.She’
ssomean
andbi
tt
er,
Idon’
tli
keheratal
landI
’
m
gl
adt
hatshechoset
oleav
e.Si
bongi
l
e
andIcl
i
cked,
she’
smkhul
u’
slastbor
n
f
rom t
hesecondwi
fe.She’
sabsol
utel
y
t
heopposi
teofhermom andIt
hinkI
l
i
keher
.Thent
her
e’smkhul
u,who
doesn’
twantmeoutofhi
ssi
ght
.He
woul
dcal
lmej
ustt
ocuddl
emeonhi
s
l
apandsaynot
hing.It
hinkhav
inga
f
emal
ever
sionofhi
msel
fmakeshi
m
happy
.
“
Comel
et’
ssneakoutt
heywi
l
lwasht
he
di
shes”Sbongi
l
ewhi
sper
sinmyearand
t
akesmyhandaswemakeourwayout
.
Wewokeupat5am t
opr
epar
e
ev
ery
thi
ngf
ort
hecer
emony
.Itwas
supposedt
obeasmal
lcer
emonybut
Mkhul
uwentov
erboar
dandsl
aught
ered
acow.Thewhol
ecommuni
tyi
sher
eto
cel
ebr
atewi
tht
heMt
himkhul
u’
sfor
mama’
sret
urn.
“
Wher
ear
ewegoi
ng,
youknowt
heywi
l
l
f
indus”
“
Wear
egoi
ngt
omyboy
fri
end’
spl
ace,
if
y
oudon’
tmi
nd”
“
Asl
ongasy
ouar
enotgoi
ngt
ohav
e
sex
”Shel
aughs
“
Nowewon’
t”
“
I’
mti
red,
Iwantt
onap”
“
Youwi
l
lnapatmyboy
fri
end’
spl
ace,
he
haspl
ent
yofr
ooms”
“
Mimi
!”OhGod!
“
Mkhul
u”
“
Woz
a”(
come)Igr
oan
“
Makei
tsnappyMi
ra,
ify
oudon’
tcome
backwi
thi
n5mi
nut
esngi
yakushi
ya
mi
nauz
okugez
isaumkhul
uwakho
l
ezaz
itsha”Sbongi
l
eandIar
ethesame
agebutshe’
s6mont
hsol
dert
hanme.
“
Iwi
l
lcomebacknow”Imakemywayt
o
t
hecr
owdofmenwher
emkhul
uis
seat
edi
nhi
swheel
chai
r.Igr
eetonce
agai
nbecausei
tmi
ghthappent
hat
t
her
ear
eot
her
swhohav
ejoi
nedt
hatI
hav
en’
tsee.
“
Sondel
amz
ukul
u”(
comecl
osermy
gr
andchi
l
d)Hesay
spul
l
ingmet
ohi
slap
“
Mkhi
zenangukeumz
ukul
uwami
lo
ebi
ngi
khul
umangay
e”(
Mkhi
zeher
e’s
mygr
anddaught
ert
hatIwast
alki
ng
about
)
“
Sawubonamz
ukul
u”Say
samanI
pr
esumei
sMkhi
ze
“
Hisi
r,howar
eyou?
”
“
Awmz
ukul
uumkhul
uakaf
undanga
i
slunguasaz
iwa”(
yourgr
andf
atheri
s
noteducat
edhedoesn’
tknowEngl
i
sh)
“
Ohngi
yax
oli
samkhul
u,bengi
buz
a
i
mpi
l
o”(
I’
m sor
rygr
andpaIwasaski
ng
howar
eyou)
“
Hay
isi
khonasi
ssi
j
abul
aukukwaz
i.
Awumuhl
emaan”(
Wear
efi
neI
’
m happy
t
omeety
ou.Youar
esobeaut
if
ul)I
bl
ush
“
Ngi
yabongamkhul
u”(
thanky
ou
gr
andpa)
“
Ufananami
uyambonaMkhi
ze”Hesay
s
pr
oudl
y
(
Shel
ooksl
i
keme)Het
ell
sthatt
o
ev
ery
onehei
ntr
oducesmet
o,l
ol.
“
Impel
angi
shonamehl
o,konj
eut
he
akaboni
?”(
Trueev
ent
heey
es,
yousai
d
she’
sbl
i
nd)
“
Yebokunj
alo”(
Yest
hat
’st
rue)
“
Iyi
sibususol
engane”(
Thi
schi
l
disa
bl
essi
ng)
.Theycont
inuewi
tht
hei
r
conv
ersat
iont
hatdoesn’
tinv
olv
emebut
t
hismani
snotl
ett
ingmego.
“
Mkhul
ukuz
omel
engi
yogez
aiz
itsha”
(
Mkhul
uIhav
etogowasht
hedi
shes)
“
Kadeuv
uki
l
emt
anomt
anami
phumul
a
manj
e”(
youwokeupear
lyt
odayy
ou
canr
estnow)
“
It
hingi
yol
alake”(
Okayl
etmegosl
eep
t
hen)i
t’
sonl
ythent
hathel
etsmego,
af
terki
ssi
ngmyf
orehead.
“
Youal
mostdi
dn’
tfi
ndmel
et’
sgo”
Sbogi
l
esay
sasshehol
dsmyhandt
hen
wel
eav
e.
“
Yourboy
fri
endwon’
tmi
ndt
haty
ou
comi
ngwi
thme”
“
Nohewon’
t”
“
Howl
onghav
eyoubeent
oget
her
?”
“
5year
s”
“
Wowy
oul
oveeachot
herneh”
“
Yesbuti
t’
swasn’
teasy
”
“
Washecheat
ing?
”Shesi
ghsheav
il
y,I
cant
ell
thatwhat
evert
hathashappened
i
sdeep
“
Notr
eal
l
y,af
terImat
ri
cul
atedIhadt
o
got
oGaut
engt
ofur
thermyst
udi
esonl
y
t
ofi
ndoutIwaspr
egnant
.Isawmy
dr
eamsf
adi
ngawayr
ighti
nfr
ontofme.
It
oldhi
m andhewashappybutIwas
nothappybecausemyl
i
fewasgoi
ngt
o
beonhol
dwhi
l
ehecont
inuedwi
thhi
s.
Wewer
est
il
lyoungandnotr
eadyf
or
t
hebabyandi
tdi
dn’
thel
pthathecomes
f
rom apoorf
ami
l
ywhi
l
eIont
heot
her
handIwoul
dhav
ebeent
hrownoutat
home,
ifmydadf
oundoutIwas
pr
egnant
.Theonl
yopt
ionwast
odo
abor
ti
on,
ourr
elat
ionshi
ptookabi
g
st
rai
naf
tert
heabor
ti
ont
othepoi
ntt
hat
Isawmy
sel
flosi
nghi
m.Formont
hswe
di
dn’
ttal
ktoeachot
herev
ent
houghwe
wer
est
udy
ingi
nthesameuni
ver
sit
y.I
wassobr
okenMi
rat
hencamemy
bi
rt
hday
.Heboughtmear
oseandmy
f
avour
it
echocol
ate,
that
’swhenwe
r
eki
ndl
edourr
elat
ionshi
p.Si
ncet
hen
t
hingsbet
weenushav
ebeenamaz
ing,
wedof
ightl
i
keot
hercoupl
es
somet
imesbutwel
oveeachot
her
”
“
WowI
’
m sor
ryy
ouhadt
ogot
hrough
t
hatbuti
tmadey
ourl
ovest
ronger
”
“
Yeahhe’
sthebestt
hingev
er,
from t
hat
dayIv
owedt
omy
sel
ftonev
erhav
e
dr
unksex
.Wewer
eal
way
spl
ayi
ngsaf
e.
Idi
dn’
twantt
ousebi
rt
hcont
rol
becausei
tmessesupwi
thhor
monesso
Ipr
efer
redpr
otect
ion.Onedaywewent
t
oapar
tyofhi
sfr
iendandgotdr
unk
t
henhadsex
.ThathowIf
all
pregnant
”
Ist
oponmyt
racksandt
hinkaboutt
hat
ni
ght
.Di
dweusepr
otect
ion?Ihav
e
nev
erbeendr
unkl
i
ket
hati
nmyl
i
feand
st
il
ltodayIcan’
tremembert
heev
ent
s
t
hathappenedbutIknowt
hatwehad
sexbecausemyv
agi
nawasbur
ningt
he
f
oll
owi
ngday
.
“
No!
”
“
What
?”
“
Nonononono”
“
Mir
awhat
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Ihav
etogobackhomeSboshandcal
l
Lwandl
elwenkosi
.”I
’
mtal
ki
ngf
astand
br
eat
hingr
api
dly
“
Youneedt
ocal
m downandbr
eat
he
Mi
ra”Shesay
sbr
ushi
ngmyback
“
Breat
hei
nsl
owl
yanddeep”Idoasshe
say
s
“
Yesy
ouar
edoi
ngi
tgood.
..
nowt
alkt
o
me”It
ell
herev
ery
thi
ng
“
Okayl
et’
sgobackhome,
I’
m sur
ethey
ar
ehal
fwaywi
thdi
shes.Youhav
e
not
hingt
owor
ryabout
”
“
Whati
fI’
m pr
egnantSbosh.
..
ohGod!
”
“
Heyheycal
m downmay
bey
ouar
e
wor
ryi
ngy
our
sel
ffornot
hing,
let
’sgo
homeandcal
lhi
m.Thenwewi
l
ltakei
t
f
rom t
her
e”wewal
kbackhome,
theway
seemssol
ongnow.
“
BabyIhav
ebeenl
ooki
ngf
ory
ou,
are
y
ouokay
”mom say
saswemakeour
wayi
n
“
YesMamaI
’
mfi
ne”
“
Arey
ousur
e”shecupsmyf
ace
“
I’
mjustt
ir
ed”
“
Goandsl
eep”
“
Wher
e’sKamar
ia,
shehasmyphone”I
say
“
Iwi
l
lgogeti
tfr
om her
”Si
bongi
l
esay
s
andwal
ksawayl
eav
ingmewi
thmama
“
Ifsomeonehur
tyouorsai
dany
thi
ng
st
upi
dtoy
oupl
easet
ell
meIwi
l
lki
ck
t
hei
rfl
atbehi
nds”Il
augh
“
Iknowmommy
,butdon’
twor
ryI
’
m
f
ine”
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Shepl
ant
sapeckonmy
l
i
pst
henal
l
owmet
ogot
hebedr
oom,
mom andIar
eusi
ng.Icr
awl
ont
hebed
andwai
tforSbosh.I
’
m scar
edIhopewe
usedpr
otect
ion.Iheart
hedooropeni
ng.
“
It
’sal
mostr
unni
ngoutofbat
ter
y”
“
Ihav
etobuyheraphonef
orgames”
Thebedsi
nksasi
taccommodat
esher
nex
ttome.
“
It
’sbet
tert
hatway
..
.her
e”Shehands
memyphoneandIdi
alLwenkosi
.
“
Sthandwasami
”
“
Heyl
ove,
howar
eyou”
“
Imi
ssy
ousomuch,
ubuy
ani
ni”(
when
ar
eyoucomi
ngback)
“
Tomor
roworMonday
”
“
Mondayi
stoof
arpl
easecomeback
t
omor
row”
“
Mom wi
l
ldeci
det
hat
,cuddl
ecakes.
”
“
Ihopeakhobhar
ilaphoez
ama
ukuz
enz
ami
na”(
Ihopet
her
e’snoi
diot
t
her
ewho’
str
yingt
obeme)
“
Eveni
fther
ewas,
youownmysoul
”
“
Ngi
yakut
handay
ezwa”(
Ilov
eyou)
“
Ilov
eyousomuchmor
e..
.babydi
dwe
usepr
otect
ionont
hatni
ghtwewer
e
dr
unk?
”
“
Uhm It
hinkso”
“
Whatdoy
oumeany
out
hinkso
Lwenkosi
?”
“
Weusedi
t”
“
Didy
oudi
scar
ditt
hef
oll
owi
ngday
?”
“
Nor
emember
,wehadt
orushsoI
di
dn’
t”myhear
tst
opbeat
ing.Ihangup
r
ightt
her
eandt
hen.Hecal
lbackbutI
swi
tchof
fmyphone,
myheadi
s
spi
nni
ng.Ican’
tbepr
egnantno!
“
Whatdi
dhesay
?”
“
He’
snotsur
eSbongi
l
e,Ican’
tbe
pr
egnantoht
hix
oonef
efehowcanIbe
socar
eless”Ibur
sti
ntot
ear
s
“
Heydon’
tcr
ymay
bey
ouar
enot
pr
egnant
,may
bey
ouguy
sused
pr
otect
ion”shesay
spul
l
ingmet
oher
chest
“
Sshhdon’
tcr
ysweet
hear
t,Icancal
lmy
boy
fri
endt
ogety
oumor
ningaf
terwhat
aboutt
hat
?”
“
Doy
out
hinki
twi
l
lwor
k,i
t’
sbeena
week?
”
“
OhMi
rabutt
ryi
ngwon’
thur
tmay
be
y
ouar
ewor
ryi
ngy
our
sel
ffornot
hing”
“
Yout
hinkso?
”
“
YesImeant
her
ewasasangomaher
e,
I
’
m sur
eshewoul
dhav
esai
dsomet
hing
t
oyou”
“
Wasshesupposedt
osayany
thi
ng?
”
“
Yeahshe’
sasangomat
hesepeopl
e
knowev
ery
thi
ng.Ihav
enev
ert
old
any
oneaboutt
heabor
ti
onbutshet
old
met
hatIneedt
odoacl
eansi
ng
cer
emonybecauseoft
heabor
ti
on”
“
Isupposey
ouar
eri
ghtbutI
’
m scar
ed
Si
bongi
l
e”
“
Don’
tbescar
edev
ery
thi
ngwi
l
lbeokay
”
shest
rokesmybackasIweepsi
l
ent
ly.I
hopeshe’
sri
ght
.IswearIwi
l
ldi
eifIf
all
pr
egnantagai
n.
I
nmydeepsl
eepIcanhearanangel
i
c
v
oicesi
ngi
ngasongIhav
enev
erhear
d
bef
ore.I
t’
ssobeaut
if
ulandt
ugsatmy
hear
tst
ri
ngsIi
nvol
unt
ari
l
ymakemyway
t
owher
ethev
oicei
scomi
ngf
rom but
I
’
m unabl
etor
eachwher
eit
’scomi
ng
f
rom.Ihearf
oot
stepsshuf
fl
ingawayas
Igetcl
oser
.
“
Wai
tuppl
easedon’
tgo”It
ryt
owal
k
f
ast
erbutIcan’
treachher
,it
’s
f
rust
rat
ing
“
Don’
trunaway
,Iwon’
thur
tyou.Ij
ust
wanty
out
otel
lmet
henameoft
he
song,
Ilov
eit
.I’
m amusi
cianwecando
aduett
oget
her
.It
’sabeaut
if
ulsong”I
’
m
notsur
eifshehear
dmebecauseshe’
s
cont
inui
ngwi
thhersi
ngi
ng
“
Didy
ouhearwhatIsai
…ahhhhh”I
scr
eam i
nagonyasIf
eel
thebur
ningi
n
myey
es.
“
Mir
a!.
.Mi
ra.
.Vuka!
”­Ij
umpupcr
yingand
dr
enchedi
nsweat
.Ir
ubmyey
es
somet
hingi
swr
ong!
“
Itwasj
ustadr
eam”Sbongi
l
esay
s
“
Noi
twasnotadr
eam Sbosh”Icr
y
“
Whatdoy
oumean?
”
“
Myey
es,
somet
hingi
swr
ong!
”Icr
y
hy
ster
ical
l
y
“
Mir
acal
m down”
“
Sbongi
l
eumenz
ani
umt
anami
”Ihear
mymom’
svoi
ce,
somet
hingst
rangei
s
happeni
ng,
Icov
ermyey
eswi
thmy
hands
“
Idon’
tknowsi
sBonga,
wewer
e
sl
eepi
ngt
henIhearhercr
yingi
nher
sl
eep”
“
Baby
”
“
Mamaamehl
oami
”(myey
es)
“
Enz
eni
baby
”(what
’swr
ongwi
tht
hem)
“
Somet
hingi
swr
ongmama!Ther
e’s
wast
hiswomanwhowassi
ngi
ngi
nmy
dr
eam,
Ifol
l
owedhershebur
nedmy
ey
es!
”
“
Mir
acl
eIneedy
out
ocal
m downy
our
ey
esar
enotbur
nt,
itwasj
ustadr
eam
br
eat
heokay
”
“
Noooi
twasnotadr
eam,
somet
hing
st
rangei
shappeni
ngmama”
“
Remov
eyourhandsf
rom y
ourey
esand
t
ell
uswhat
’shappeni
ngi
nyourey
es”I
r
emov
emyhandsf
rom myt
earst
ained
f
ace.
“
I’
m conf
usedbutt
her
e’ssomuch,
I’
m
unabl
etomakesenseofev
ery
thi
ng”
“
Cany
out
ouchany
thi
ngy
ousee”my
mom’
svoi
cesay
s,Il
ookt
oherdi
rect
ion
andt
ouchandf
eel
her
,it
’sonl
ythenmy
mi
ndr
egi
ster
sthatwhatI
’
mtouchi
ngi
s
act
ual
l
ywhatI
t’
sri
ghti
nfr
ontofme.
“
Mamai
sthi
syou?
”Ir
unmyf
inger
sti
ps
onherf
eel
i
nghersof
tandf
lawl
essski
n.
Idon’
tknowi
fthemeani
ngofbeaut
yis
whatI
’
m seei
ngr
ightnowbuti
nmyown
descr
ipt
ion,
thi
sist
hemostbeaut
if
ul
t
hingIhav
ecomeacr
ossi
nmyl
i
fe.
“
Youcanseeme?
”shesay
swi
thshock
i
nherv
oice
“
Ift
hisi
syout
hatI
’
mtouchi
ngr
ightnow
t
heny
ouar
eoneoft
het
hingsi
nfr
ontof
myey
es”
“
OhmyGodshecansee!Ther
e’s
not
hingwr
ongwi
thy
ourey
esMi
ra,
what
y
ouar
eseei
ngi
nfr
ontofy
oui
sreal
.It
’s
whatsi
ght
edpeopl
esee.Youcansee
mybaby
!Mybabycanseee!
!”Herv
oice
i
sfi
l
ledwi
thsomuchemot
ionbutj
oyi
s
l
oudenought
obemi
ssed.
“
Icansee?
”Iwhi
sper
,tr
yingt
odi
gest
what
’shappeni
ng,
assoonasi
t
r
egi
ster
stomeIbur
sti
ntot
ear
s.Idon’
t
knowi
fIshoul
dbehappyorsad,
ev
ery
thi
ngar
oundmei
t’
ssof
orei
gn!
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayPhet
heni
Per
sev
erencePor
ti
aDube,
Sir
eny
a
Yongama&Char
mai
neZoeHadebe.
HappyBi
rt
hdayCnehBut
hel
ezi
Mashenge&TsheppyWagaAsi
eng

CHAPTER66(
unedi
tedsnack-
nyana)

Ihav
enev
erbeenov
erwhel
medl
i
keIam
r
ightnowi
nmyl
i
fe.Ev
ery
thi
ngar
ound
mei
t’
ssof
orei
gnandi
t’
sscar
ingt
he
l
i
vingshi
toutofme.Ihav
eal
way
shad
met
athesi
ophobi
a.Iswearmyname
shoul
dchangef
rom Mi
racl
eto
Maphobi
a,t
hewayIhav
ephobi
afor
al
mostev
ery
thi
ng.Ihav
efuckedup
per
sonal
i
tyIt
ell
you.Ihav
ebeenbl
i
nd
f
oral
most24y
ear
sofmyl
i
febutnot
ev
enoncehav
eIt
houghtIwi
l
lev
ergai
n
mysi
ghtoneday
.Thi
sisami
racl
e
i
ndeedIdon’
tknowhowi
t’
shappened
orwhatwaswr
ongbef
orebecauset
he
doct
orscoul
dn’
treal
l
ydet
ectt
he
under
lyi
ngi
ssuebehi
ndmybl
i
ndness.I
hav
edi
ff
erentemot
ionsr
eel
i
ngov
erme
r
ightnowbutf
eari
sov
erpower
ingmy
ot
heremot
ions.Howwi
l
lIcopewi
tht
his
newl
i
fe,
theonl
yli
feIhav
eev
erknown
i
nmyl
i
fei
sbei
ngbl
i
ndnowIhav
eto
l
ear
ntol
i
vewi
thsi
ght
.Ev
ery
onei
snow
gat
her
edar
oundmel
ooki
ngatmeand
I
’
m soov
erwhel
medbyt
hesedi
ff
erent
f
acest
hatIhav
enev
ercomeacr
ossi
n
myl
i
fe.
“
Mybabycansee!
!!
”mom i
sscr
eami
ng
l
i
keacr
azywomanandsheddi
ngt
ear
s
ofj
oy.
“
Mimi
uyambonaumkhul
u?”(
Cany
ou
seey
ourgr
andf
ather
?)Say
sthi
sol
d
mani
nfr
ontofmewi
thawhi
tebear
d
andhaz
eley
es,
thef
ir
stt
hingt
hat
comest
omymi
ndr
ightnowi
sthatt
hey
sayIl
ookl
i
kehi
m.
“
Yebomkhul
u”(
yesgr
andpa)
“
Ohmz
ukul
uwami
ngi
yaj
abul
a!”(
Ohmy
gr
anddaught
erI
’
m sohappy
)Ican’
t
mi
sst
heex
cit
ementi
nhi
svoi
ceandhi
s
f
aci
alex
pressi
oni
sleav
ingmei
nawe.
I
’
m soamaz
edathowonecanex
press
hi
sorheremot
ionst
hroughf
aci
al
ex
pressi
onwi
thouthav
ingt
osayal
ot.I
canev
enseemymom r
ightnowwho’
s
cr
yingbutemot
ionsdi
spl
ayedonher
f
acear
eact
ual
l
ynotsomet
hingcl
oset
o
sadness.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evemybabycanseeaf
teral
l
t
hesey
ear
s”mom say
s
“
Doy
ouknowwhatdoest
hismean
Nono”Gogosay
sIl
ookatwher
eher
v
oicei
scomi
ngf
rom andseeher
.God
she’
ssobeaut
if
ul!
“
Whatdoesi
tmean?
”Mom asks
“
It
’smeansNont
ethel
elof
orgav
eyou”
Nowt
hatmkhul
usai
dthati
t’
smakes
sense.
“
Thi
sissobeaut
if
ulI
’
m soemot
ional
r
ightnow”Mom Dudusay
s,ev
ery
onei
s
ex
pressi
nghowhappyandst
unnedt
hey
ar
eandal
lI’
m doi
ngi
stur
ningmyhead
l
eft,
rightbackandf
ort
hjustt
olookat
eachper
sont
hati
stal
ki
ng.
“
Howdoy
ouf
eel
nowt
haty
ouhav
e
gai
nedy
oursi
ght
?”Thati
sSbosh’
s
v
oiceIt
urnt
ofaceherandshehasa
wi
l
dsmi
l
epl
ast
eredonherf
ace.How
canIf
orgett
oment
iont
hatshe’
s
beaut
if
ul.
“
I’
m scar
edandamaz
edatt
hesame
t
ime”Iconf
ess
“
Youdon’
thav
etobescar
edbabyy
ou
shoul
dbehappyy
ougai
nedy
oursi
ght
”
mom say
s
“
Mom t
heonl
yli
feIknowand
comf
ort
abl
ewi
thi
sthepr
evi
ousone
nowIhav
etost
artanewl
i
fewi
thsi
ght
andev
ery
thi
ngi
ssof
orei
gn”Icr
y
“
Heydon’
tcr
yyouhav
eourf
ull
suppor
t
myMi
racl
e,y
ouwi
l
lgetuset
othi
sli
fe
andenj
oyi
t”shewi
pesmyt
ear
sand
ki
ssesmyf
orehead.
“
Yougott
hisMi
racl
e”mal
ume
Thembi
nkosi
say
s.
“
Yeahst
opcr
yingnowandbehappy
!”
Sboshsay
sgi
vi
ngmeav
eryt
ight
squeez
ethatIcan’
tev
enbr
eat
he
“
Jesuswomany
ouwantt
oki
l
lmej
ust
whenIgotmysi
ghtumonaSi
bongi
l
e!”
(
Jeal
ousy
!)Ther
oom er
uptwi
th
l
aught
er.
“
OkaynowIhav
eseeny
’al
lugl
yfaces
canIseemybeaut
if
ulmoonl
i
ght
baki
thi
”weshar
elaught
er.
“
Iwi
l
lgogether
!”Sboshsay
sandj
umps
outofbedt
henwal
kaway
.Mi
nut
esl
ater
Iseehermaki
ngherwayi
n,t
he
momentmyey
esl
ayonmydaught
er
wat
erwor
ks.Shepl
acesheronmy
t
highs.
“
Mommywhyar
eyoucal
l
ingmeIwas
pl
ayi
ngnz
eee”myGodIcan’
tbel
i
eveI
’
m
st
ari
ngatmydaught
erf
ort
hef
ir
stt
ime
i
nmyl
i
fe.Nowt
hisi
sthemostbeaut
if
ul
t
hingIhav
eev
erseeni
nmyl
i
fe.
“
Iwantt
oseey
oubaby
”Ikeepmygaz
e
onherandt
hej
oyandwar
mthIf
eel
r
ighti
nthi
smomenti
sbey
ond
measur
abl
e.
“
Mommywhyar
eyoucr
ying”shewi
pes
myt
ear
swi
thhersmal
lhands.
“
I’
m sooohappyt
oseemymoonl
i
ght
.I
hav
egai
nedmysi
ghtandIcanseey
ou
baby
.Youar
esobeaut
if
ul!
”myt
ear
s
i
nvol
unt
ari
l
yfal
ldownmyf
ace.
“
Itol
dyout
haty
oucanseemommy
,I’
m
beaut
if
ull
i
key
ou!
”Ohmyhear
tmel
ts.I
cr
adl
eheragai
nstmychest
.Icansee
ev
ery
onewi
pingt
hei
rtear
s.
“
Ilov
eyousomuchmypumpki
n”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomommy
”Il
ovet
hisl
i
ttl
e
humanbei
ngandseei
ngherf
ort
hef
ir
st
t
imei
seasi
ngmyf
ear
.Shegi
vesmet
he
r
easonwhyIhadt
ogai
nmysi
ght
.If
ree
herf
rom myembr
aceandl
ookather
“
Ican’
tbel
i
eveshe’
smycr
eat
ion,
she’
s
sobeaut
if
ul”Icar
essherf
ace,
Icoul
d
st
areatherf
orf
orev
er.Shewi
ggl
es
her
sel
foutofmyar
msandj
umpsdown
f
rom t
hebed
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ngnow?
”I’
m not
donel
ooki
ngatherbat
hong!
“
Comemommy
”shepul
l
southersmal
l
handandIr
oll
outofbedt
hent
akeher
hand.If
oll
owherbehi
ndasshewal
ks
t
owar
dst
hist
hingt
hatI
’
m notsur
ewhat
i
tis.
“
Lookt
her
eandt
ell
mewhatdoy
ou
see?
”Il
ookatt
hist
hingshe’
spoi
nti
ngi
n
f
rontofusandIseeabeaut
if
ulol
der
v
ersi
onofmydaught
er.Ismi
l
eand
she’
ssmi
l
est
oo,
Itouchmyl
i
psandshe
doest
hesamet
oo.It
ryt
otouchherbut
I
’
m unabl
etodot
hat
“
Whycan’
tIt
ouchherandwhyi
sshe
copi
ngme?
”
“
Becauset
hati
syoumommy
,youar
e
st
ari
ngy
our
sel
finami
rr
or”
“
OhmyGod!
”Igetcl
oserandl
ookat
my
sel
fint
hemi
rr
orasmydaught
ersai
d.
“
Thi
sisme?
”
“
Yest
hathowy
oul
ookl
i
kemyMi
racl
e”
Mom say
s
“
WowI
’
m beaut
if
ulmos”Isayt
ouchi
ng
myf
aceandmaki
ngal
lsor
tsofl
ooks.I
f
indmy
sel
flaughi
ngast
ear
scascade
downmyf
ace.Thi
sisamaz
ing!

Il
ookatherasshe’
sst
ari
ngather
r
efl
ect
ionont
hemi
rr
or,
doi
ngal
lsor
tof
f
unnyf
acesandl
aughi
ng.Ican’
tbegi
n
t
odescr
ibehowhappyIam t
hatmy
daught
ergai
nedhersi
ght
.YesIhav
e
al
way
swi
shedt
hatshedoesoneday
butIt
houghti
twasj
ustawi
shf
ul
t
hinki
ng.Imeant
hedoct
ort
ri
ed
ev
ery
thi
ngt
heycoul
dbutt
heycoul
dn’
t
f
indwhatwast
her
eal
probl
em wi
thher
ey
es.Nowi
t’
sconf
ir
medt
hather
bl
i
ndnesswasancest
ral
.Theangerand
hat
redmysi
sterhadonmewasal
so
di
rect
edt
omydaught
ert
oohencet
he
compl
i
cat
ionofpr
egnancyaswel
lher
bl
i
ndness.I
fIknewal
loft
hisIwoul
d
hav
ecomebackhomesooneranddo
t
hingsr
ight
.Al
li
ttookwasasi
ncer
e
apol
ogyandacer
emonyf
ormy
daught
ert
ogai
nhersi
ghtaf
teral
most
24y
ear
sofherl
i
feengaboni
.It
’sbr
eaks
myhear
tthatal
lthesey
ear
smy
daught
erwassuf
fer
ingbecauseofme.I
hav
ecomet
oreal
i
zet
hatr
evengenev
er
heal
abr
okensoul
buti
t’
sasel
f
damagi
ngweapon.I
nmycasenotonl
y
di
dIdamagemy
sel
fbutmydaught
er’
s
aswel
l
.Li
fei
sful
lofmy
ster
iesIt
ell
you,
i
ftheShakasagadi
dn’
thappenwho
knowsmay
bewhat
’shappeni
ngnow
woul
dntbehappeni
ng.Wewoul
dn’
t
hav
emetMaMdl
uli
,wi
thoutherI
coul
dn’
thav
epossi
blyknownt
hatI
neededt
oaskf
oranapol
ogyt
omyl
ate
si
ster
.Iguessasmuchasmydaught
er
andLwandl
elwenkosi
wentt
hrougha
hor
ri
bleex
per
iencei
tcameoutwi
tha
posi
ti
veout
come,
mydaught
ercansee!
“
Gosht
hisi
ssoamaz
ing!
”Shesay
s
wi
pinghert
ear
s.Iknowi
twi
l
ltake
somet
imef
orhert
ogetuset
o
ev
ery
thi
ngsi
nceshehasal
way
sbeen
bl
i
nd.Ev
ery
thi
ngsheknowsi
sthr
ough
hersenseoft
ouchorf
eel
i
ngonl
ynot
si
ght
.
“
Let
’sgoout
sidesot
haty
oucanseet
he
beaut
yofnat
ure”shet
akeshermuf
fi
n
“
Nobabyy
oudon’
tneedt
hatnow”she
gi
ggl
es
“
Ohy
es”shamemybaby
,wemakeour
wayoutoft
hebedr
oom headi
ng
out
side.Thesuni
soutbutt
her
ear
e
cl
oudst
her
eandt
her
eint
hesky
.Her
ey
esar
eroami
ngar
ound,
she’
stot
all
y
amaz
edathersur
roundi
ngs.Wehel
p
hert
oident
if
yev
ery
thi
ngar
oundherone
byone,
shecan’
tst
opgaspi
ng.
“
Ohmygoodnesst
heskyi
sbeaut
if
ul
mor
ethenIhav
eev
eri
magi
ned”
“
It
’smor
ebeaut
if
uli
nsummerwhen
t
her
ear
enocl
oudsatal
l
”
“
Wow!
”She’
slooki
ngsky
war
dand
smi
l
ingwi
del
y.She’
sli
keachi
l
dwho
j
ustst
art
edseei
ngt
hings,
shecan’
tst
op
aski
ngquest
ionsandwear
ehappyt
o
t
ell
her
.Thi
ssi
ghtr
ighther
eist
hemost
beaut
if
ulsi
ghtev
erandi
tmakesme
emot
ional
.It
akeav
ideoofher
,Ineedt
o
keept
hismemor
ytol
astmef
orev
er.
“
Stopcr
yingnowy
ougetaheadache”
Thembi
nkosi
say
s
“
I’
mjusthappy
”
“
Iknowsi
sIknow.I
’
m al
sohappyy
ou
camebackhome”
“
Wer
euni
tedagai
n.Letmecal
l
makhosi
”Henods,
Iex
cusemy
sel
fand
got
othebacky
ardt
hencal
lmakhosi
“
Hel
l
o”
“
Himakhosi
hav
eyouar
ri
ved?
”
“
NoI
’
m ont
heway
”
“
Ihav
ecal
l
edt
otel
lyout
hatmy
daught
ergai
nedhersi
ghtdoesi
tmean
mysi
steraccept
edmyapol
ogy
?”
“
Yesmychi
l
dsheaccept
edy
our
apol
ogyandshe’
ssohappyt
ofi
nal
l
y
j
oinherf
ami
l
y”myhear
tleapswi
thj
oy
“
Thanky
ousomuchmakhosi
youar
e
t
hebest
!”
“
it
’smyj
obmychi
l
d.”
“
Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
atert
ofi
ndouti
fyou
ar
ri
vedsaf
ely
”
“
Okaysi
s”Ihangupandsayal
i
ttl
e
pr
ayerl
ooki
ngupt
othesky
.It
hinkI
shoul
dgot
hankmysi
sterper
sonal
l
y,
si
nceev
ery
onei
sbusyat
tendi
ngMi
ra.I
geti
nsi
det
hehouset
otakemycarkey
s
t
hendr
ivet
omysi
ster
sgr
ave.Ikneel
downbef
orei
t.
“
Nont
ethel
elo,
it’
smeNokubonga.I
wantt
othanky
ousomuchf
or
accept
ingmyapol
ogy
….”apr
esence
behi
ndmedi
stur
bsme.Igetupf
rom
t
hegr
oundandswi
vel
around.Igasp
wi
thshockasIl
ookathi
m.Inev
er
t
houghtIwi
l
lseet
hisf
aceev
eragai
nin
myl
i
fe.Amemor
yofhi
mthr
owi
ngme
outofhi
shouseandcur
singatmeaf
ter
It
oldhi
mthatIwaspr
egnantf
lashes
bef
oremyey
es.It
akeahugebr
eat
he
t
ryi
ngt
okeepi
ttoget
her
.
“
Ihear
dandIt
houghtt
heyar
ely
ingso
i
t’
str
uey
ouar
eback”
“
Mfani
seni
”Isaycal
mly
“
Wher
e’smydaught
er?
”Ichuckl
e,how
doesheknowi
t’
sadaught
er
“
Isawheront
vandIknewshe’
smi
ne”
“
Ohr
eal
l
ynow”
“
Whatdoest
hatsupposet
omeanIhav
e
nev
erdeni
edmydaught
er”
“
Stopcal
l
inghermydaught
ermy
daught
ermykl
otaukunuka!
”Hel
aughs
“
Whet
hery
oul
i
kei
tornotI
’
m herf
ather
.
Iwantt
omeether
”Ishakemyheadi
n
di
sbel
i
ef.
“
Yout
hinkshewantt
omeety
ou?
”
“
Ofcour
senotbecausey
ouhav
efedher
al
lthebadt
hingsaboutmewhi
char
e
nott
rue.
”Letmel
eav
ethi
smanbef
oreI
l
osemymi
nd.Hegr
absmyar
mti
ght
ly
t
hati
t’
shur
tsj
ustasI
’
m aboutt
ogo
“
Youbet
termakesur
ethatImeetmy
daught
erNokubongabecausey
ouwon’
t
l
i
kei
twhenIcomet
ogetherbyf
orce!
!!
”

Ihav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
ocal
lmydol
l
facebut
sheswi
tchedof
fherphoneaf
terour
conv
ersat
ion.I
’
m sowor
ri
edabouther
r
ightnow.Iunder
standt
hatshehas
t
okophobi
aandt
hepossi
bil
i
tyofher
bei
ngpr
egnanti
sfr
eaki
ngheroutr
ight
now.I
’
mtr
yingt
ocr
ackmybr
ain
r
emember
ingt
heev
ent
soft
hatni
ght
butsomeoft
hem ar
ebl
ur.Mydol
l
face
andIar
eal
way
smaki
ngoutev
ery
wher
e
andany
timesowedeci
dedt
okeepa
packofcondomsi
nmycarofwhi
chI
hav
en’
ttouchedbutaf
tershecal
l
edmeI
hadt
ogocheckandIsawt
hati
t’
sopen
andt
her
ear
e3mi
ssi
ngr
ubber
sIguess
wear
esaf
e.It
ryt
ocal
lheragai
nbutI
r
ecei
vet
hesamer
esul
t.I
m onmyway
t
oseemyuncl
eint
hehospi
tal
butI
’
m
di
stur
bedbyt
hisgi
rlst
umbl
i
ng,
you
coul
dseeshe’
sinpai
nIpul
lov
erand
st
epoutoft
hecar
“
Hel
l
owher
ear
eyougoi
ngIcangi
ve
y
oual
i
ft”shet
urnst
olookatme
“
Ayanda!
”Isay
“
Lwa.
.l
wa.
.”Icat
chherbef
oreshef
all
s
down,
Iscoopherupandputheri
nmy
caratt
hebackseat
.She’
sbl
eedi
ngand
unconsci
ous.Ij
umpt
omyseatand
speedof
ftot
hehospi
tal
.Iwonder
what
’swr
ongwi
thher
,luckymymom i
s
t
heonet
hatat
tendherIt
ell
herwhat
happenedt
hent
heyr
ushof
fwi
thher
.
I
nst
eadofwai
ti
ngIdeci
det
ogoseemy
uncl
e.Hi
ssi
ghti
shear
tbr
eaki
ngIt
ake
hi
shandandsqueez
eit
“
Heymal
ume.
..
youneedt
owakeup
pl
ease.Ican’
tlosey
oumpi
ntshi
yegaz
i,
comebackt
oust
u”Icantst
andl
ooki
ng
athi
mli
ket
his.Imakemywayoutand
wai
tformama.I
t’
sawhi
l
elat
erwhen
mom appr
oachesme.
“
Howi
sshemom?
”
“
Shehadami
scar
ri
ageIhav
erunsome
t
est
stof
indoutwhati
sthecauseof
t
hemi
scar
ri
age.
”
“
She.
.Shewaspr
egnant
?”
“
I’
m af
rai
dyes,
wasi
tyour
s?”
“
Idon’
tknowmamashenev
ert
oldme
she’
spr
egnant
.CanIseeher
?”
“
Come”If
oll
owherasshel
eadsmet
o
Ay
anda.
“
Youwi
l
lbeokayr
ight
?”
“
Yeahmama”sheki
ssesmycheekand
wal
ksaway
.Imakemywayi
nandwal
k
t
owar
dsherbed.Herey
esopen.
“
Hey
”It
akeherhandi
ntomi
ne
“
Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
”
“
I’
m sor
ryLwandl
e”t
ear
sfal
l
sdownt
he
si
deofherf
ace
“
Wasi
tmi
ne?
”Shenodsherhead,
my
hear
tsi
nks
“
I’
m sor
ry”
“
It
’sokayi
t’
snoty
ourf
aul
t”
“
Iti
smyf
aul
tI.
.I
…Iwassoscar
ed
Lwandl
eandy
oul
eftmeso.
..
I…I
…dr
ank
somet
hingf
ort
er.
..
ter
minat
ion”she
bur
sti
ntot
ear
s.Il
etgoofherhand
“
Youki
l
ledmybabyAy
anda!
”
“
I’
m sor
ryLwandl
eI….
”Iwal
koutr
ightat
t
hatmomentf
umi
ngwi
thanger
.

Wej
ustar
ri
vedi
nJohannesbur
g,we
wer
esupposedt
ochecki
nahot
elbut
myhusband’
scousi
ninsi
stedt
hatwe
comet
ost
ayi
nhi
shouse,
hiswi
fehad
al
readypr
epar
edar
oom f
orusmucht
o
myhusband’
sdi
sappr
oval
buthedi
dn’
t
wantt
ocomeaccr
ossasr
ude.Hepul
l
s
of
ftot
hisenor
mousbeaut
if
ulmansi
on
andr
ingst
hei
nter
com.Thegat
eopen
andwedr
ivei
nandpar
kint
hey
ard.He
getoutt
oopenmydoorf
ormet
henwe
makeourwayi
n.Abeaut
if
ulwomani
n
herear
lyf
ort
ieswel
comeus
“
Hel
l
ocomei
n”wemakeourwayi
n,I
’
m
amaz
edathowbeaut
if
ult
hishousei
s.
Ev
ery
thi
ngscr
eamsex
trav
aganz
a!I
wantt
oownahousel
i
ket
hisoneday
.
“
Qhawekaz
i..
.I
”Thel
i
ghtski
nnedman
st
oppedmi
dsent
encewhenheseesus
andhegr
eet
sus,
wegr
eethi
m back.
“
Thi
sismywi
fe,
iQhawekaz
ilami
”He
ki
sseshercheek
“
Babyt
hisMpendul
oandhi
swi
fe…”
“
Gugu”Isay
“
Nicet
omeety
ouGuguandMpendul
o”
Shegi
vesushugs.
“
Wher
ear
eyourl
uggages”asks
Mpendul
o’scousi
n
“
Int
hecar
”
“
Letmehel
pyouwi
tht
hem”Theywal
k
outl
eav
ingmewi
tht
hisbeaut
if
ul
woman.
“
ComeGugu”If
oll
owhert
othel
ounge
andweset
tl
eont
hecouch.
“
Feel
freeasmuchasy
ouwantt
hisi
s
y
ourhomet
ooy
ezwasi
s”
“
Eh”Sheget
supanddi
sappear
sthen
comesbackwi
thj
uiceandcooki
es
“
Thanky
ou”amomentl
atermyhusband
andhi
scousi
nwal
ksi
nandj
oinus.We
engagei
nagener
alchat
,theyseem t
o
beni
cepeopl
eandt
heyar
ever
y
wel
comi
ng.Mpendul
o’sf
atheri
sint
he
hospi
tal
sowewi
l
lgoseehi
m af
terwe
hav
efi
nishedhav
ingcooki
esandj
uice
“
Whosecari
sthatpar
ked…”Hepauses
whenheseesus.Ichokeonmyj
uice
andcough.Not
hisi
snothappeni
ng!
“
Showsomer
espectMel
i
siz
weand
gr
eet
”Say
sMr
sXul
u.Mel
igr
eet
smy
husbandonl
y,ashe’
saboutt
omakehi
s
wayouthi
sfat
herst
opshi
m.
“
Hai
boMel
i
siz
wey
oudi
dn’
tgr
eetGugu?
Wher
ear
eyourmanner
s?”
“
Iwon’
tgr
eett
hatbi
tch!
”Hi
smom gasp
“
Hai
boMel
i
siz
we!
”
“
Whatmom she’
sabi
tchv
eleshe’
sthe
r
easonwhyNsi
kaandIdonotgetal
ong.
Ihat
ethatIl
ostmybr
otherbecauseof
her
”Il
ookdownI
’
m soashamedr
ight
nowIwi
sht
hef
loorcanopenand
swal
l
owme
“
Whati
shet
alki
ngaboutGugu”Sox
asks
“
Wai
tist
hist
hegi
rlt
haty
ouandNsi
ka
wer
efi
ght
ingabouty
ear
sback?
”
“
Yesdad”
“
Idi
dn’
tknowy
ouwer
ebr
other
s
Mel
i
siz
we”Isaywi
thaneart
ear
svoi
ce.
Ihav
enev
erbeenhumi
l
iat
edl
i
ket
hisi
n
myl
i
fe
“
Yeahwhat
ever
!”Hewal
ksaway
“
Canany
onet
ell
mewhat
’shappeni
ng?
”
Mpendul
osay
slooki
ngatme
“
CanIpl
easet
alkt
omyhusbandi
n
pr
ivat
e”MrandMr
sXul
uxcuseus.Isi
t
nex
ttomyhusband.
“
It
’sal
li
nthepastSoxwewer
en’
t
t
oget
hert
hatt
imeandIdi
dn’
tknow”I
ex
plai
ntohi
m andhel
aughsbi
tt
erl
y
“
Soi
not
herwor
dsy
ouf
uckedmy
nephewandmycousi
n’
swi
fe’
stwi
n
si
ster
’sson?Wowubani
kahl
ekahl
e
ongaz
angeul
alenay
eGugu?
”
“
ButSoxwewer
en’
ttoget
her
…”
“
Thi
sisembar
rassi
ng!Youhav
esl
ept
wi
thev
erymemberofmyf
ami
l
y!”He
get
sup
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?Wear
est
il
l
t
alki
ng”
“
I’
m goi
ngt
ogetmycousi
nthenwewi
l
l
got
oseemyf
ather
”
“
I’
m comi
ngwi
thy
ou”
“
Noy
ouar
enotIdon’
twantt
obemor
e
embar
rasedt
henIal
readyam whenI
f
indoutt
haty
ouhav
eal
sosl
eptwi
thmy
f
ather
.Angi
thi
wenauhambauv
ula
i
ndunul
eftr
ightandcent
er”Hi
swor
ds
cut
sdeepi
nmyhear
tIcoul
dn’
thel
pbut
cr
y.
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdaySi
bongi
l
e
Sagaci
ous

CHAPTER67(
unedi
ted)

Weal
lhav
epastespeci
all
ypastt
hatwe
ar
enotpr
oudofbutmant
he
mor
ti
fi
cat
iont
hatcomeswi
thmywi
fe’
s
pasti
stoomuch.IknowIwasv
ery
har
shonherbutIwasbei
nghonestwi
th
her
.I’
m embar
rassedenoughIdon’
t
t
hinkIwi
l
ltakeanot
hermor
e
mor
ti
fi
cat
ionwhenIdi
scov
ert
hatshe
al
sof
uckedmyf
ather
.I’
m st
il
ltr
yingt
o
getov
ert
hatshef
uckedmyuncl
enow
t
hisay
.Iknewt
hatshe’
sfor
war
dandal
l
butInev
ert
houghtshe’
stheki
ndof
per
sont
hatuset
osl
eepar
ound.Mi
ra’
s
di
sappear
ancebr
oughtuscl
oserandi
t
mademedi
scov
ert
het
hingsIdi
dn’
t
knowaboutGugut
hatIl
oveabouther
.
Ourr
elat
ionshi
pmi
ghthav
est
art
edas
aboutsexbutIendedupf
all
i
ngf
orher
.
“
Mpendul
o!”Qhawesnapsmeoutofmy
t
rance,
wear
edr
ivi
ngt
othehospi
tal
to
seemyf
ather
.
“
Yes?
”
“
What
’sony
ourmi
nd”
“
Not
hing”
“
Wer
eyouandGugut
oget
herwhenshe
wast
wot
imi
ngmysons?
”
“
No”
“
Theni
tshoul
dn’
twor
ryy
ou”
“
Buti
t’
sembar
rassi
ngQhaweknowi
ng
t
hatshesl
eptwi
thmynephewaswel
l
asy
ourwi
fe’
stwi
nsi
ster
’sson”Andmy
uncl
etoo!Ofcour
seIcan’
tsayt
hatt
o
hi
m.
“
Yourwi
fei
syoungMpendul
osoIcan
i
magi
nehowy
oungshewas4y
ear
s
back.Shewasboundt
odot
hingst
hat
she’
snotpr
oudof
.Weal
lhav
edone
t
hingswear
enotpr
oudofespeci
all
y
whenwewer
eyoungdon’
thol
dit
agai
nsther
.”
“
Iguessy
our
ight
”
“
Ofcour
seI
’
mri
ght
,don’
twor
ryabout
mysonIwi
l
ltal
ktohi
m andwewi
l
lkeep
t
hisbet
weenus.Thewhol
efami
l
y
doesn’
thav
etoknowbecauseIseet
hat
whaty
ouar
ewor
ri
edabout
.Mel
i
siz
we
i
sangr
ythathi
srel
ati
onshi
pwi
thNsi
ka
hav
enev
erbeent
hesameaf
terwhat
t
ranspi
red.Theywer
ever
ycl
osey
ou
woul
dn’
ttel
lthatMel
i
siz
wei
ssi
xyear
s
ol
dert
henNsi
ka.
”
“
I’
m sor
ryt
oheart
hat
”
“
Theyneedt
ost
opt
hisr
eal
l
ybecause
i
t’
snotl
i
keGuguknew….
wear
eher
e”He
say
saf
terpul
l
ingov
eri
nthepar
kingl
ot.
Wegetoutoft
hecarandmakeourway
i
n.Icanf
eel
myhear
tbeat
inghar
das
wemakeourwayt
othatmancal
l
edmy
f
ather
.Qhaweopenst
hedoort
henwe
wal
kin.Myey
esi
nvol
unt
ari
l
yst
areat
t
hemanl
yi
ngont
hehospi
tal
bed,
att
his
momentIwantt
otur
nbackandwal
k
out
.It
sir
kst
hehel
loutofmet
hatI
’
m
hi
srepl
i
ca.
“
ComeMpendul
o”Qhawesay
sashe
not
icet
hatIhav
eceasedmywal
k.
Ther
e’sal
soanol
dwomanwho’
ssi
tt
ing
downnex
ttohi
m.Iwal
kcl
oser
.
“
Mpendul
othi
smyuncl
eandt
hisi
shi
s
wi
fe”
“
Greet
ings”Isay
“
Howar
eyoumf
anawami
”say
stheol
d
woman
“
I’
m goodmahowar
eyou?
”
“
Hay
isi
yancengababa.
..
Gxabhashecan
y
ouseeMpendul
o”Shesay
stoher
husbandwhol
ookssof
rai
landi
nso
muchpai
n.
“
Ye.
..
ye.
..
Yes.
..
Thank.
.you.
.for
..
comi
ng.
.myson”Tal
ki
ngi
sast
ruggl
eto
hi
m
“
Whatdoy
ouwant
?”Isaywi
th
annoy
ance.It
houghtIcanbeabl
eto
f
acehi
m butnowseei
nghi
mismaki
ng
meangr
y.
“
Can.
.y
ou.
..
two.
..
giv
eus.
.a.
..
space.
.I
wantt
otal
kto.
.myson”
“
Kul
ungi
l
e”(
it
sokay
)Theol
dwoman
say
sassheget
supt
hent
heywal
kout
wi
thQhawe.
“
I’
m sor
rymysonIknowI
…”coughi
ng
di
stur
bshi
mfr
om t
alki
ng.Hel
ooksv
ery
ol
dthenmymom.
“
Sitdown”Isi
tdownont
hechai
rand
l
ookathi
m.
“
Iknowapol
ogi
zi
ngwon’
tmakeany
di
ff
erencebutIwanty
out
oknowmy
sont
hati
twasnev
ermyi
ntent
iont
o
abondonedy
ouandy
ourmot
her
.Your
mot
herandIwer
ehav
inganaf
fai
r….
”
“
Wai
tanaf
fai
r?”
“
YesIwasal
readymar
ri
edt
omywi
fe
whenImety
ourmot
her
.Qhawe’
s
mot
herandherwer
efr
iendsohshewas
beaut
if
ul.
.t
ocutt
hel
ongst
oryshor
twe
st
art
edseei
ngeachot
heraf
terourf
ir
st
dat
ebutourr
elat
ionshi
phadt
obe
di
scr
eet
”Li
ar!
“
Youar
ely
ingmymom woul
dnev
er
dat
eamar
ri
edman!
”
“
Shedi
dn’
ttel
lyoukant
i?”
“
Noal
lIknowi
sthaty
out
wower
ein
l
ovebutwhenshef
all
pregnanty
our
an
away
”
“
Truewewer
einl
ovebutshewant
ed
met
oleav
emywi
feandki
dsandbe
wi
thher
,Icoul
dn’
tdot
hatIl
ovedt
hem
bot
h.Whenshet
oldmet
hatshewas
pr
egnantIwassohappyandhopi
ngf
or
aboybecauseIdon’
thav
eabi
ologi
cal
son.Yourmot
herwant
edmor
ethen
whatIcoul
dgi
veherhencesheused
y
ou,
shet
oldmet
ochoosebet
weenher
andmywi
feandki
ds.It
houghtshewas
j
oki
ngwhenshesai
dIwi
l
lnev
erbea
par
tofy
ourl
i
fei
fIdon’
tchooseher
.One
daywhenIwentt
ocheckonheraf
terI
madei
tcl
eart
ohert
hatIwi
l
lnev
er
l
eav
emywi
feandki
dsshewasn’
tther
e.
Theysai
dshet
ookev
ery
thi
ngt
hat
bel
ongt
oherandl
eft
.Thatwast
hel
ast
Ihear
dabouther
”I’
m shockedt
ohear
t
his!
“
Youar
emaki
ngt
hisst
ory
!Youar
e
l
yi
ng!
”
“
Iwassoangr
yandIdi
dn’
tev
en
bot
her
edt
ofi
ndherandI
’
m sor
ryf
or
t
hat
.Ishoul
dhav
efoundherf
ort
he
sakeofy
ou.
”Hecoughshar
d.Icansee
t
hathe’
ssi
ncer
ebutpar
tofmedon’
t
wantt
obel
i
evet
hatmom i
stheonet
hat
deni
edusourf
art
her
“
Wewer
etwoact
ual
l
y,myt
winbr
other
wasshoty
ear
sback”
“
Real
l
y?”Hi
sey
esgl
i
stenwi
tht
ear
s
“
Yes”
“
Ohi
t’
sal
lmyf
aul
tIshoul
dhav
etr
iedt
o
f
indy
ourmot
her
”
“
Yesy
oushoul
dhav
e”
“
I’
m so.
..
sor
”Hecoughsagai
n,spi
tt
ing
bl
ood.Igetupt
ogetwat
erf
orhi
mthen
hel
phi
m dr
ink
“
Tha.
.t
ha.
.t
hanky
oumyson.I
’
m so
happyt
oseey
ouandIl
ovey
ousomuch.
Pl
easeal
l
owQhawet
ogui
de.
….”The
machi
nesst
art
sbeat
ingr
api
dly
.
“
Baba.
..
arey
ouokay
?..
.Baba!
”Ir
ushout
andcal
lforhel
p
“
Nur
se!Doct
or!
”Theycomer
ushi
ngt
o
meandgeti
n
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”Qhaweasks
“
Wewer
ejustt
alki
ngandt
hemachi
ne
st
art
edbeat
ingr
api
dly
”wet
ryt
ogeti
n
butt
heypushusout
“
That
’smyuncl
e!Iwantt
ogeti
n!”
Qhaweshout
s
“
Siry
oucantgeti
n,al
l
owust
odoour
wor
k”Thedoorshutbef
oreus.Mymi
nd
i
sreel
i
ngwi
tht
hought
s,hecan’
tdi
enow
Ist
il
lneedanswer
s!Ij
oinQhaweandhi
s
auntwhoar
ecuddl
i
ngont
hecouch.
“
Don’
tcr
yAunt
yhewi
l
lbeokay
”it
’sa
whi
l
elat
erwhent
hedoct
orcomesout
,
west
andupr
ighti
nthatmoment
.I’
m
unabl
etor
eadhi
sface.
“
Howi
shedoct
or?
”Iask
“
I’
m sor
rywehav
elosthi
m”Dad’
swi
fe
bur
sti
ntoal
oudcr
ywhi
l
eIst
ayr
oot
ed
onmyspott
ryi
ngt
odi
gestwhatj
ust
happened.Ionl
ymetmyf
atherf
orf
ew
mi
nut
esandhe’
sgonej
ustl
i
ket
hat
!

Ican’
tkeepawaymygaz
eather,
Ihav
e
beenawakef
orl
i
keanhournowj
ust
st
ari
ngatmydaught
erwhosesl
eepi
ng
peacef
ull
ysky
war
d,hert
inymout
his
openedsl
i
ght
lyandherl
egsar
espr
ead
wi
del
ytheot
heronei
sonmymom’
s
wai
stwho’
sal
sosl
eepi
ngandt
heot
her
l
egi
sonmyst
omach.Ihav
eal
way
s
knewukut
hiul
alakabi
umt
anami
but
wat
chi
ngherr
ightnowIcan’
thel
pbut
smi
l
e.It
akemyphoneIwantt
ocapt
ure
t
hismomentIr
emembert
hatIswi
tched
i
tof
fyest
erdayaf
tert
hecal
lwi
thmy
cuddl
ecakes.Iswi
tchi
tonandf
ora
momentI
’
m conf
usedbutIi
gnor
ewhat
I
’
m seei
ngandf
oll
owt
hev
oiceasusual
.
“
BabyIhav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
ocal
lyousi
nce
y
est
erday
!”
“
Goodmor
ningt
oyout
oomycuddl
e
cakes”Hechuckl
es
“
Mor
ningst
handwamar
awhyungenz
a
soar
eyouokay
?”
“
I’
mfi
neI
’
mjustwor
ri
edabouty
ou,
you
don’
tsoundokay
”
“
Iwi
l
ltel
lyouwheny
ougether
e.Imi
ss
y
ousomuchIj
ustwantt
obei
nyour
ar
msr
ightnow”Hesoundsbr
okenand
t
hati
smaki
ngmewor
ry.Iwon’
tbeabl
e
t
ospendanot
herdayher
eknowi
ngt
hat
he’
snotokayandheneedsme.
“
What
’swr
ongst
handwasami
”
“
Justcomebackpl
ease”
“
OkayIwi
l
ltal
ktomymom”
“
Youhav
enot
hingt
owor
ryaboutwe
usedpr
otect
iont
hatni
ght
”
“
Yousoundsosur
e”
“
YesI
’
m sur
e”Ibr
eat
houtofr
eli
ef
“
Wheeew!Thanky
ouIwassowor
ri
ed.
”
“
Don’
tbemyl
ovewear
esaf
e”
“
Ilov
eyousomuch”
“
Ilov
eyoumor
etheny
oucoul
dev
er
know”myhear
tmel
ts.
“
Ican’
twai
ttoseey
ou!
”Isay
“
Meet
oomyl
ove”Iwon’
ttel
lhi
mthatI
canseeIwantt
osur
pri
sehi
m.Iseemy
mom openi
ngherey
es
“
ByeIwi
l
lcal
lyoul
ater
”Isay
“
Mcwamcwa”Igi
ggl
eandhangup
“
Mor
ningmama”
“
Mor
ningbaby
”shesay
swi
thasmi
l
eon
herf
ace,
mymom i
sbeaut
if
ulpeopl
e!
“
Youar
eupsoear
ly”
“
Icoul
dn’
tsl
eepI
’
m soanx
iousabout
t
hisnewj
our
neyofmyl
i
fe”
“
Ever
ythi
ngwi
l
lbeokayy
ouwi
l
lsee
wheny
ouhav
egotuset
oev
ery
thi
ng.I
’
m
her
efory
ouandI
’
m goi
ngt
ogi
vey
oual
l
mysuppor
t”Ismi
l
e.Il
ovehery
azi
n.I
st
ret
choutmyhandandshet
akesi
t
andsqueez
eit
.Inot
iceamar
konher
wr
ist
,
“
What
’st
his?
”
“
It
’snot
hing”shel
etsgoofmyhandand
sl
i
deher
sundert
hebl
anket
s.
“
It
’sdoesn’
tlookl
i
kenot
hingt
ome,
it’
s
l
ookl
i
kei
t’
shur
tsdoesi
thur
tmama?
”
“
Mir
aIsai
dit
’snot
hing!
”Herey
es
cl
osedmoment
ari
l
yasshebr
eat
hesout
l
oudl
y
“
I’
m sor
ryf
orshout
ingaty
ou.Your
f
atherdi
dthi
stome”
“
Pleasedon’
tcal
lhi
mthathe’
snotmy
f
atherandwhyt
hehel
lwoul
dhedot
his
t
oyou?
”
“
Hewant
stomeety
ou”
“
Sohemustt
ohur
tyouuy
ahl
any
a!Got
o
t
hepol
i
cemamahemanhandl
edy
ou
r
ight
?”
“
Notr
eal
l
yhej
ustgr
abbedmywr
istt
oo
t
ight
lyandt
hreat
enedt
otakey
ouby
f
orce”Il
aughandshakemyheadi
n
di
sbel
i
ef
“
Thatmani
scr
azyhuh?Takemeby
f
orceam Ihi
spossessi
on?Whatev
en
makesmemor
eangr
yist
hathet
hathe
hur
tyou.Thener
veoft
hatman
bat
hong!
”Iseeasmi
l
etuggi
ngt
he
cor
ner
sofmymom’
sli
ps
“
What
?”Iask
“
Ijustl
ovey
ou”
“
Howmuchdoy
oul
oveme?
”Isaywi
th
asmi
l
eonmyf
ace
“
Whatdoy
ouwantMi
racl
e”
“
Hawumamacan’
tIasknowhowmuch
dol
oveme”
“
Iknowy
ouphel
a”
“
Okayf
inecanwepl
easegobackhome
t
oday
”
“
Ujaheni
?”(
What
’st
her
ush)
“
Ther
e’snor
ushdon’
tyoumi
ssuncl
eK”
shel
aughs
“
Justsayi
tthaty
ouwantt
osee
Lwandl
e”Igi
ggl
eshy
ly
“
Howdoeshel
ookl
i
ke?
”Iask
“
Mubi
siswuuuh”(
he’
sugl
y)Shesay
s
l
aughi
ng
“
Hawumama”
“
Thandasi
sighoghoy
akho
angi
namona”shel
aughs.Thi
swomani
s
cal
l
ingmymani
ghogho
“
Ighoghophomama”Isul
kandshe
l
aughsev
enmor
e.
“
Wecangot
odayi
t’
sfi
ne”Kamar
ia
wakesupandl
ooksatmewi
thpout
y
l
i
ps
“
Mor
ningmymoonl
i
ght
”
“
Mor
ningmommy
..
.whatam Idoi
ng
now”sheopenshermout
hwi
l
d
“
Youar
eopeni
ngy
ourmout
h”
“
Youcanst
il
lsee!
”Shebeams,
Ichuckl
e
di
dshet
houghtIwi
l
lwakeupbl
i
nd
agai
n?Idon’
tbl
amehert
houghIst
il
l
can’
tbel
i
eveIcansee.
Wewakeupandmom showmehowt
o
dot
hebed,
wedoi
ttoget
heroncewe
ar
edonewepr
epar
eour
sel
vest
ogo
backhome.Anhourl
aterwear
eready
t
ogoandwehav
ehadbr
eakf
ast
.The
f
ami
l
yissadt
hatwear
eleav
ingbutwe
pr
omi
set
ovi
sitagai
n.
“
Khul
uyouhav
epackedmychi
ckens?
”
Kamar
iaasksmygr
andpa
“
Yesnunut
heyar
eint
heboot
.Your
sar
e
3andy
ourmom hav
e2”
“
Thanky
ousomuch!
”Shebeams
cl
appi
nghert
inyhandsex
cit
edl
y
“
Whatchi
ckens?
”Iask
“
Sheaskeddadt
ogi
veherchi
ckens”
mom say
s
“
Hay
iwho’
sgoi
ngt
olookaf
tert
he
chi
ckens?
”
“
Meeeemommy
!”
“
Hai
boKamar
iahowdoy
ouknowt
o
t
akecar
eofchi
ckenswena?
”
“
Iknowmommyandkhul
ugav
eme
moneyt
obuymai
zef
ort
hechi
ckens,
see”sheshowsmeanot
eofwhi
chI
don’
tknowhowmuchi
tis.Icansee
howhappyshei
sandi
t’
swar
msmy
hear
t
“
Thanky
oumkhul
u”Isay
“
Youar
ewel
comemygr
anddaught
er
pl
easedocomebackt
ovi
sitokay
”
“
Iwi
l
l”Ibendt
oki
sshi
sfor
eheadand
hughi
m.Hugsandki
ssesar
eshar
edf
or
t
hel
astt
ime,
it’
sabi
tt
ersweetmoment
af
tert
hatwegeti
nthecaranddr
iveof
f.
Ican’
tkeepmyey
esawayf
rom t
he
wi
ndowadmi
ri
ngGod’
scr
eat
ion.
“
Mommywhati
sthat
?”Iask
“
It
’sat
ree”
“
Ohwowi
t’
sbeaut
if
ul”
“
Youwantt
ogoseei
t”
“
Yespl
ease!
”Shepul
l
sov
erandIst
ep
outoft
hecarandwal
ktot
het
ree.
“
Thesear
ethel
eav
esr
ight
”
“
Yesbaby
”
“
Wowbeaut
if
ulmor
ethenIhav
eev
er
t
hought
”OnceI
’
m sat
isf
iedwewal
k
backt
othecaranddr
iveof
f.Ihav
e
nev
erhadani
nter
est
ingandf
unj
our
ney
l
i
ket
hisonei
nmywhol
eli
fe,
tof
inal
l
y
seet
hingst
hatIhav
eonl
yimagi
ned
howt
heyl
ookl
i
ke.Gogohadmadeus
umphako,
inkukhuy
esi
zi
luand
dumpl
i
ngsy
ummyI
’
mtel
l
ingy
ousowe
don’
tneedt
opassbyanyr
est
aur
antt
o
eat
.
“
Iwantt
oseeKi
nthehospi
tal
soIwi
l
l
dr
opy
ouguy
satZo’
spl
aceandcome
f
etchy
oul
ater
”
“
Okay
”Kamar
iai
ssl
eepi
ngi
nmyar
ms,
she’
sti
redi
twasal
ongj
our
ney
.Wear
e
par
kedi
nthi
sbeaut
if
ulhouseandmom
getoutt
oopent
hedoorf
orme.Ist
ep
outcar
eful
l
ywi
thmydaught
eri
nmy
ar
mst
henwemakeourwayi
n.Wear
e
wel
comedbymom Zo,
wowt
his
womani
sbeaut
if
ull
i
keherhear
t.
“
Imi
ssedy
ouguy
ssomuch!
”Shehugs
mymom t
henhugsmeandmydaught
er.
“
Imi
ssy
out
oosi
s,howar
eyou”
“
I’
mfi
neni
nani
njani
?Howwashome”
“
Angi
hlel
iyazI
’
m goi
ngt
othehospi
tal
t
oseeKy
oucanaccompanymei
fyou
ar
enotbusysot
hatwewi
l
lcat
chup”
“
I’
m notbusysi
swecango”
“
Youar
esobeaut
if
ulmom Zo”Isay
l
ooki
ngatherandshesmi
l
eswi
del
y.I
cani
magi
nehowmycuddl
ecakesl
ook
l
i
kei
fhi
smom i
sbeaut
if
ull
i
ket
his.
“
Thanky
ousweet
hear
t”
“
Youdon’
tgetdoy
ou?
”Mom asks
“
Getwhat
?”
“
Mir
agai
nedhersi
ght
!”Mom say
s
ex
cit
edl
y
“
Youar
ely
ing!Real
l
y!”Shel
ooksatme,
I
oncesai
dthaty
ouwoul
dn’
ttel
lthatI
wasbl
i
ndbecausemyey
esl
ooked
nor
mal
.
“
Yesy
est
erdayaf
ter
noon”Isay
“
OhmyGodI
’
m sohappyf
ory
ouMi
ra!
”
shepul
l
smeandmydaught
eri
nher
ar
msandsqueez
esus.Thenshest
art
s
pr
ayi
ng,
that
’smom Zof
ory
oubutI
’
m
notcompl
aini
ng.He’
swor
thyt
obe
pr
aisedi
ndeedwhowoul
dhav
ethought
t
hatonedayIwoul
dev
ersee.
“
Amen”mom andIsayaf
terher
“
I’
m sohappyBonga”
“
Meet
ooZo”Theywi
peeachot
her
’s
t
ear
s.Ncoot
heyl
ookcut
e.
“
LetmegoputKamar
iadown”Isay
“
Gost
rai
ghtont
hef
ir
stdoorLwandl
eis
t
her
e”
“
Kadephel
aengi
bel
esel
aukut
hiuj
ahe
ukubonaucuddl
ecakeswakhe”mom
say
sandt
heyl
augh.Ishakemyhead
andl
eav
ethem t
her
ethenmakemyway
t
omycuddl
ecakesbedr
oom.Idon’
t
knockbutwal
kin,
he’
ssl
eepi
ngsky
war
d.
Ir
oam myey
esar
oundt
hebedr
oom,
so
t
hishowmybaby
’sbedr
oom l
ookl
i
ke.I
wal
kcl
oset
othebedandpl
aceKamar
ia
nex
ttohi
mthensi
tnex
ttohi
m st
ari
ng
athi
m.Mom wasl
yi
ngakasi
yoi
ghogho
nott
hatIknowhowi
t’
slookl
i
kebutI
cant
ell
thati
t’
sugl
yandscar
y.Gosh
he’
swhatIact
ual
l
ypi
ctur
edhi
mtobe,
myhandsomeman.Myt
ear
sfal
lonhi
s
cheekasIcar
esshi
sface.Hebl
i
nkshi
s
ey
esopenandl
ooksatme,
myhear
t
ski
psabeat
.
“
Baby
”Hi
svoi
cei
sdeepandsex
y
“
Cuddl
ecakesngi
buy
il
e”(
I’
m back)I
whi
sperast
ear
sfal
ldownmyf
ace
“
Heywhyar
eyoucr
ying?
”Hesi
tsonhi
s
but
tinani
nst
antandl
ooksatmewi
th
somuchwor
ryi
nhi
sey
es.
“
Youar
esobeaut
if
ul”It
ouchhi
sface,
f
eel
i
ngandbr
ushi
ngi
t.
“
Soar
eyoumyl
ovedon’
tcr
y”Hewi
pes
myt
ear
swi
thhi
sthumb.
“
Youdon’
tunder
standLwenkosi
”
“
Under
standwhat
?”
“
Icanseey
ou”
“
Yesmyl
oveI
’
m her
ewi
thy
ou”
“
JesusLwenkosi
youcanbesl
owwhen
y
ouwantt
oImeanIgai
nedmysi
ght
y
est
erday
!”
“
W..
what
?”
“
Isai
dIgai
nedmysi
ght
”Isaysmi
l
ing
“
Ohmydol
l
facey
oucansee?
”Hecan’
t
hi
deshocki
nhi
svoi
ceInodwi
thmy
headv
igor
ousl
y.
“
Yesmycuddl
ecakes”
.
“
Ohwowmydol
l
facecansee!
”
“
YesIseey
oubaby
,fort
hef
ir
stt
imei
n
myl
i
feIcanseet
hisguywhol
oveme
andaccept
edmeasbl
i
ndasIwas,
the
guywhowal
kedi
nmyl
i
feandcapt
ured
myhear
tnowmyl
i
fei
smagi
cal
l
y
beaut
if
ulbecauseofhi
spr
esencei
nmy
l
i
fe.Il
ovey
ousomuch
Lwandl
elwenkosi
youar
eabl
essi
ngi
n
myl
i
fe”
“
Mybabycansee”Hewhi
sper
sast
ear
s
f
lowdownhi
sgor
geousf
ace.Iwi
pe
t
hem wi
thmyt
humbsandl
ookdeepi
n
hi
sey
es
“
Icanseebaby
”
“
Happydoesn’
tbegi
ntodescr
ibehowI
f
eel
myDol
l
face”Hewhi
sper
sonce
agai
nasmor
etear
sfal
l
sdownhi
sface
“
IknowbabyIknow”Iwhi
sperbackand
pr
essmyf
oreheadagai
nsthi
sashe
hol
dsmef
ordearl
i
fei
nhi
sar
ms.I
r
emembert
hisonedayweher
einhi
s
bedr
oom andIt
oldhi
m Iwi
shedt
hat
onedayIcoul
dseet
hisguywhogotme
weaki
nthekneesandcapt
uredmysoul
.
Hegotsomot
ional
andcr
iedj
ustl
i
ke
howhe’
scr
yingr
ightnowandi
t’
sso
beaut
if
ult
owat
ch.Muhl
engi
shoekhal
a
smakade!

I
t’
swasr
eal
l
yni
cer
euni
ti
ngwi
thmy
f
ami
l
yaf
ter24y
ear
s.If
eel
li
keabur
den
onmyshoul
der
shav
ebeenl
i
ftedof
f.I
di
dn’
treal
i
zehowmucht
hishav
ebeen
wei
ghi
ngonme.Hat
redandanger
br
ingsnegat
ivi
tyener
gyi
none’
sli
feand
y
oucannev
erf
indhappi
nessandpeace.
Zoof
fer
edt
odr
ivesi
nceI
’
mti
redf
rom
al
lthedr
ivi
ng.I
t’
swasal
ongj
our
ney
t
heni
twassupposedt
obebecauseI
hadt
ost
opev
erynowandt
hent
oshow
mydaught
erev
ery
thi
ngshef
ound
f
asci
nat
ing.
“
Ican’
tbel
i
eveMi
racansee”Zosay
s
“
Iwasal
sost
unned”
“
Sot
hatmeanst
hecer
emonywent
wel
l
?”
“
Yesmakhosi
conf
ir
medt
hatmyl
ate
si
steraccept
edmyapol
ogy
”
“
Howwasev
ery
one?Wer
etheyhappyt
o
seey
ou”
“
Yest
heywer
ehappyev
enmydad.We
t
alkedt
hingst
hroughandmakhosi
was
r
ightt
hemanhasbeenl
ongi
ngt
o
r
euni
tewi
thme.Dor
iswasbi
tt
erbutI
under
standwher
e’sshe’
scomi
ngf
rom
I
’
mresponsi
blef
orherdaught
er’
s
deat
h.”
“
Iunder
standt
oobuti
t’
sbeeny
ear
s
Bongasheneedt
oleti
tgonow.I
fyour
si
sterf
orgav
eyouwhycan’
tshedot
he
same.
”
“
May
beonedayshewi
l
lbutIdoubtt
hat
womanhasal
way
sbeenbi
tt
er.
”
“
Whati
mpor
tanti
sthaty
ourf
ather
f
orgav
eyouandy
ourl
atesi
ster
”
“
True.
..
didy
oumanaget
ogi
veBheki
umut
i”
“
NoIhav
en’
tIwaswor
kingni
ghtshi
ft
t
hesepassedf
ewday
swhenIcome
backhomeIf
indhi
m al
readyonhi
sway
t
owor
k”
“
Okay
..
.Unj
ani
uKhuz
ani
”(How’
s
Khuz
ani
?)Sher
eleaseasi
gh
“
He’
sst
abl
e”wear
ri
veatt
hehospi
tal
andmakeourwayi
n.I
tshear
tbr
eaki
ng
t
oseehi
mly
inghopel
essl
yont
hisbed.I
wi
shhecanwakeupal
ready
.Imi
sshi
m
somuch,
thesepastf
ewday
ssi
ncehe’
s
beeni
ncomaf
eel
sli
key
ear
s.
“
Canhehearmenj
e?”
”
Yeshecanheary
ou”Iki
sshi
sfor
ehead
f
ir
stbef
oresi
tt
ingdown
“
Thabi
zol
oI’
m backf
rom Dumbe.I
twas
r
eal
l
yni
cemeet
ingmyf
ami
l
yaf
teral
l
t
hesey
ear
s.Mom sentherr
egar
dst
hen
mydadsai
dyouneedt
owor
kyourbut
t
of
fbecausehesur
elywon’
tlety
out
ake
mecheapl
y”ZoandIshar
eshar
ea
chuckl
e
“
Cany
ouwakeupnowpl
ease”
“
Zani
pleasemanf
ight
,weneedy
ou.
”Zo
add.
I
t’
shal
fanhourl
aterwhenZosay
swe
shoul
dgo
“
I’
m notl
eav
inghi
m her
e.Ihav
ebeen
awayf
or4day
sheneedsmeZo”
“
Bongacomeony
oudr
oveal
ong
di
stancey
ouar
eti
redy
ouneedt
orest
.
Youwi
l
lcomebackt
omor
rowmor
ning
pl
ease”
“
Iwantt
obeher
ewhenhewakesup”
“
Iwi
l
ltel
lCel
etocal
lyoui
fhewakesup.
Yourbodyneedst
orest
”
“
Getmeaspar
ebedIwi
l
lsl
eepher
e
wi
thhi
m”
“
Gohomeandr
estt
hent
omor
rowIwi
l
l
gety
ouabedIpr
omi
se”Isi
ghheav
il
y
andki
ssK’
sfor
eheadt
henwel
eav
e.My
hear
tissor
eIr
eal
l
ymi
ssKcanhewake
upal
ready
.
“
Heydon’
tcr
yhewi
l
lpul
lthr
ough”Iwi
pe
myt
ear
sthatIdi
dn’
teal
i
zewer
efal
l
ing
“
Youneedt
obest
rongf
orhi
m Bonga”
“
Ineedsomet
hingst
rong”
“
Don’
tsayt
hati
t’
sbeenal
most3
mont
hssi
ncey
ouhav
en’
ttouchal
cohol
y
oucan’
tgi
veupnow”
Uponar
ri
val
sher
unsahotbat
hforme,
I
r
eal
l
yneedi
ttogetr
idoft
hiex
haust
ion
i
nmybody
.Isuccumbi
ntosl
umber
t
hroughoutmysoot
hingbat
h.
“
Bongawakeupt
hewat
eri
scol
dyou
wi
l
lcat
chf
lue”Zowakesmeup.Iget
outoft
hebat
htub,
drai
nwat
erandr
inse
t
hebat
htubt
henmakemywayt
othe
bat
hroom af
terwr
appi
ngat
owel
around
mybody
.Idr
yandl
oti
onmybodyt
hen
sl
i
pint
opaj
amas.Amout
hwat
eri
ng
ar
omaf
il
lsmynost
ri
lsasImakemy
ent
rancei
ntheki
tchen.
“
Mmm i
t’
ssmel
l
sdi
vi
nei
nher
ebuty
ou
di
dn’
thav
etocook.Youshoul
dhav
e
j
ustor
der
edi
n”
“
It
’snot
hingf
ancyj
ustmi
nceand
spaghet
tiwi
thcr
eamedspi
nach”
“
Thanky
ouIcan’
twai
ttoeat
”It
akeout
abot
tl
eofmi
l
kint
hef
ri
dgeandpour
my
sel
fagl
assbef
oresi
tt
ingdown
wat
chi
ngchefZocooki
ngwhi
l
ewe
engagei
nconv
ersat
ion.
“
Mir
acal
l
edandsai
ddon’
tcomeback
t
ofet
cht
hem t
heyar
espendi
ngt
he
ni
ghti
nmyhouse”
“
Hay
iakabuy
esi
fi
kanj
euf
unaukul
ala
amal
unde”(
Hay
ishemustcomeback
wej
ustar
ri
vedandshewant
stosl
eep
out
)shel
aughs
“
Youar
ebei
ngex
tranow”
“
NoI
’
m notZoj
ustbecauseI
’
m okay
t
hatshe’
sdat
ingdoesn’
tmeanIwi
l
l
al
l
owhert
osl
eepoutonmywat
ch.
Phel
aakuhl
uki
l
enokut
hingi
thi
hamba
mt
anami
uyobhej
wa”(
It
snodi
ff
erence
l
i
kesay
inggomychi
l
dandgetf
ucked)
shebur
sti
ntol
aught
er
“
Ify
ouputi
tthatwayIunder
stand.I
’
m
sur
etheywoul
dn’
tdi
srespectmeand
hav
esexi
nmyhouse”
“
Youcannev
erknowt
heseki
dsandy
ou
knowhowgoodsexi
swheny
ouar
e
doi
ngi
tinaf
orbi
ddenpl
ace”weshar
ea
gi
ggl
e.
“
Iwi
l
ltel
lLwandl
etodr
opt
hem of
f”She
wi
pesherhandswi
thadi
shcl
otht
hen
t
akeherphonet
omakeacal
l
.It
’shal
f
anhourl
atewhenmydaught
erandmy
gr
anddaught
ermaket
hei
rwayi
n.
“
Mom ZoLwenkosi
sai
dhegott
orush
somewher
esodon’
tkeephi
m wai
ti
ng”
shesay
swal
ki
ngaway
,she’
smadoh
shewi
l
lhav
etobest
rong.ZoandIhug
t
hensheki
ssesKamar
iaanddashesout
.
Iwal
ktoMi
ra’
sbedr
oom wi
thKamar
ia
onmyt
ail
.Imakemywayi
nwi
thout
knocki
ng
“
Whathappenedt
oknocki
ng?
”
“
HowcanIknocki
nmyhouse?
”She
huf
fsandcont
inuel
ooki
ngher
sel
fint
he
mi
rr
or.Thet
wot
hingsshecan’
tget
enoughofst
ari
ngati
sKamar
iaanda
mi
rr
or.
“
Comel
et’
swat
cht
v”
“
Im noti
nthemood”
“
HeeMi
rasungaz
euqumbeuml
omo
ubengakaf
ori
pipi
nje?
”
“
Whati
sipi
pidr
agongr
anny
?”Kam kam
asks
andMi
rat
urnst
olookatmewi
than
amusi
ngsmi
l
ewai
ti
ngf
ormyr
esponse.
“
Uhm i
t’
sa…umh”
“
It
’sawhatdr
agongr
anny
?”Mi
ra
pr
esseson.
“
Hai
sukani
nal
et’
sgowat
cht
vmaan!
”.
“
Buty
ouhav
en’
trepl
i
edmedr
agon
gr
anny
”
Mi
rai
sst
if
li
ngal
augh.Godt
hese
chi
l
dren!
“
It
’sat
oyf
oradul
tsonl
ybabygi
rl
”
“
Soki
dscan’
tpl
aywi
thi
t?”
“
YesKam Kam”
“
CanIseei
tatl
east
?”Mi
rabur
sti
nto
l
aught
er
“
Noy
oucan’
tki
dsar
enotsupposedt
o
ev
enseei
t”
“
OhIguessIshoul
dwai
tunt
ilIbecome
anadul
t”ThatmakesMi
ral
aughev
en
mor
e.
“
Yesmyl
ove.
..
stopl
aughi
ngMi
raand
comewat
chy
ourcuddl
ecakes.An
omni
busofI
sif
ungoi
saboutt
opl
ayi
n
f
ewmi
nut
es”
“
Real
l
y?”shebeams
“
Yescome”sheget
supandwemake
ourwayt
othel
i
vingr
oom andset
tl
eon
couch.Iswi
tchont
het
vandwat
chmy
daught
erasshegasps.
“
Wow!
”If
li
pthr
ought
hechannel
sunt
ilI
r
eacht
hedesi
redchannel
.Ikeep
gl
anci
ngatherandIcanseehowpr
oud
shei
sofLwandl
e.Honest
lyhe’
s
phenomenal
act
or.
“
Cany
ouseedaddyMuuj
i
za?
”
“
Yesmypumpki
n”
“
Ial
sowantt
obei
ntvl
i
kedaddy
mommy
”
“
Youneedt
otel
lyourdaddyhewi
l
l
makeapl
an”
“
Okaymommy
”
“
Wowt
hisNoscheeki
sbeaut
if
ulbo!
”
“
Kakhul
u”shel
ooksatme
“
What
?”
“
Not
hingl
et’
swat
chsomet
hingel
se”
“
Hawuwhy
”
“
Iwon’
twat
chLwenkosi
fondl
i
ngand
shar
ingspi
twi
thanot
hergi
rlmama”
“
Buti
t’
swor
kbaby
”
“
IknowbutIhav
emett
hisgi
rlt
heyar
e
socl
oset
heyev
enf
ini
sheachot
her
’s
sent
ences.I
t’
snotsi
tt
ingwel
lwi
thme”
“
Kodwast
handwasami
youdat
ed
Lwandl
eknowi
ngt
hathe’
sgoi
ngt
obe
anact
orwhathe’
sdoi
ngnowi
stot
all
y
wor
kandashi
sgi
rl
fr
iendy
ouhav
eto
suppor
thi
m”
“
Mxm”sheget
sup
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng”
“
Iwantt
osl
eep”Shesay
sdi
sappear
ing
t
oherbedr
oom.Isi
ghaf
tert
heomni
bus
ofi
sif
ungoIdi
shupf
ormy
gr
anddaught
erandI
.Oncewear
edone
eat
ing.Ibat
hhert
henwej
oinhermom
andsl
eep.Thenex
tmor
ningI
’
m woken
upbyabaddr
eam aboutK.Mygi
rl
sar
e
st
il
lsl
eepi
ng,
Kamar
iasl
eepst
heseday
s
phel
ausual
l
yshe’
stheonewhowakes
usupat6am.Cany
oui
magi
newaki
ng
upear
lyl
i
key
ouar
egoi
ngt
owor
k.I
dr
agmy
sel
foutofbedandwal
ktot
he
bat
hroom t
otakeashower
.OnceI
’
m
donewi
thmydai
l
yrout
ineIwakeMi
ra
up.
“
Babyi
mleav
ingf
orhospi
tal
”she
mumbl
essomet
hing.Iheadoutand
dr
ivet
omuggandbeanf
ir
stt
ogeta
sl
i
ceofchocol
atecake.Ineedi
ttoget
t
hrought
heday
.Ihav
emycakewi
th
cof
feewhi
l
egoi
ngt
hroughmy
sel
fand
K’
spi
ctur
esi
nmyphone.I
’
m br
ought
backt
oear
thbyhi
m gi
vi
ngmea
handker
chi
eft
owi
pemyt
ear
sthatI
di
dn’
tknowwer
efal
l
ing.
“
Thanky
ou”It
akei
tandwi
pemyt
ear
s
“
Youar
ewel
come.
..
canIsi
tdown”Inod
myhead,
hesi
tsdownandIgi
vehi
m hi
s
handker
chi
ef
“
Youcankeepi
t”
“
Thanky
ou”wef
all
int
osi
l
encef
ora
moment
“
Whatdoy
ouwantf
rom me?
”
“
Whyshoul
dIwantsomet
hingf
rom
y
ou?
”
“
Idon’
tknowmay
bey
ouwantt
oav
enge
y
ourbr
other
?Orsomet
hingbutt
her
e
mustsomet
hingt
haty
ouwantf
rom me”
Hepl
aceshi
sel
bowsont
het
abl
eand
l
eancl
oser
,ourf
acesar
efewi
nches
awayf
rom eachot
her
.Icanf
eel
hismi
nt
br
eat
heagai
nstmyf
ace
“
Whati
fIt
ell
youIwanty
ou”He’
s
st
ari
ngdeepi
ntomyey
es
“
I’
dtel
lyout
ost
oppl
ayi
nggamesand
t
ell
met
hedamnf
ucki
ngt
rut
h”
“
Fiest
yhuh,
myki
ndofwoman.Not
ev
ery
onei
soutt
ogety
ouBonga”
“
Ohi
sit
?”
“
Yessomepeopl
eoutt
her
etheyj
ust
wannagetcl
oset
oyoubecausey
ouar
e
i
ntr
igui
ng”Il
ooki
ntohi
sey
essear
chi
ng
t
het
rut
hbuti
m unabl
etor
eadhi
m
“
Isee”
“
Socany
ougi
vemeachancet
o
i
ntr
oducemy
sel
fpr
oper
ly”
“
Okayy
oumay
”Hef
lashesasi
desmi
l
e
ex
act
lyhowKhumal
ouset
oGodt
his
wi
tchcr
aft
!
“
I’
m Zi
khal
i
..Zi
khal
iNgweny
a”hepul
l
s
outhi
shandf
orahandshake
“
Bonga.
..
NokubongaMt
himkhul
u”It
ake
hi
shandandhegr
absmi
neandki
sses
i
t,nott
aki
ngawayhi
sey
esonme.Ican
nev
ergetusehowt
hismanl
ookl
i
kemy
l
atehusband
“
Youar
esobeaut
if
ulNokubonga”
“
Thanky
ou”Hesi
tbackst
il
lnott
aki
ng
hi
sey
esof
fme
“
Yourcof
feei
scol
dnowl
etmegety
ou
anot
herone”Hesnapshi
sfi
nger
sand
cal
l
sthewai
tert
ogetmeanot
hercof
fee.
“
Sot
ell
meZi
khal
iuv
umbukaphi
?”
(
Wher
ear
eyoucomi
ngf
rom?
)He
chuckl
esandt
akesmyf
orkt
henhav
ea
pi
eceofmycake.Ist
areathi
m ashe
moanswhi
l
echewi
ngmycake
“
Thi
sist
hebestcakeIhav
eev
ert
ast
ed”
canhej
ustt
ell
mewher
edoeshecome
f
rom al
ready
!
“
I’
m comi
ngf
rom eNgwav
uma,
Icame
t
hissi
def
orwor
kpur
pose.
”
“
Ohr
eal
l
y?”
“
Yesy
oudon’
tbel
i
eveme?
”
“
Noi
t’
snott
hatcar
ryon”
“
Vusi
’
smom andmi
newer
esi
ster
s.Our
f
ather
,Khumal
owasi
nar
elat
ionshi
p
wi
thmymom andt
heywer
etr
yingf
ora
babywi
thoutsuccesssoKhumal
o
cheat
edonmymom wi
thhersi
sterand
i
mpr
egnat
edhert
wice.Whenshef
all
pr
egnantwi
tht
het
hir
dbabyKhumal
o
deci
dedt
omar
ryherandl
eav
emymom
andi
ttur
nedoutt
hatmom wasal
ready
pr
egnantwi
thme.I
’
mfewmont
hsol
der
t
henVusi
”Icanseet
hathe’
ssi
ncer
ebut
y
oucannev
erbesur
esomepeopl
ear
e
goodi
nthi
sact
ingt
hing.
“
OhI
’
m sor
ryt
oheart
hat
”
“
Suchi
sli
fe”t
hewai
terbr
ingsmycof
fee
andIt
hankhi
m
“
Soaf
tery
ouwer
ebor
nwhatdi
dyour
f
athersai
d?”
“
Hedoesn’
tknowhehasasonwi
thmy
mom andIdon’
twanthi
mtoknow.I
’
m
gl
adhel
eftmymom becausehesav
ed
herf
rom hi
sabusi
vesel
f”
“
Wher
e’sy
ourmom?
”
“
Ukhona”
“
She’
sreal
l
yast
rongwomanIadmi
re
herf
orherst
rengt
h,r
aisi
ngy
oual
one”
“
She’
sthebestandIwi
l
ldoany
thi
ngf
or
t
hatwoman”Hesmi
l
esf
aint
ly.It
wit
ch
mywr
istt
ocheckt
ime
“
Ineedt
ogonow,
thanky
ouf
orl
ett
ing
mei
nonwhoy
ouar
e”Igetup
“
Canwedot
hissomeot
hert
ime”
“
Not
hatwon’
tbepossi
ble”
“
Whynot
?”
“
Idon’
thangoutwi
thmen”
“
Buti
t’
snotmeni
t’
sjustme”Ir
oll
my
ey
es
“
ByeZi
khal
i
”Imakemywayoutand
dr
iveof
ftot
hehospi
tal
.

Zi
khal
il
ooksatBongaassheshakes
herassoutandbangst
het
abl
e.
Pat
iencei
sdef
ini
tel
ynoti
nhi
sDNAand
t
imei
srunni
ngout
.Heget
supanddr
ive
t
othehospi
tal
lor
dknowshowdoeshe
makei
ttot
hehospi
tal
saf
elyt
heway
hi
smi
ndi
sreel
i
ngwi
tht
hist
hought
s.
“
MrNgweny
ahowar
eyou?
”
“
I’
mfi
nedoct
or,
howi
sshet
oday
?”
“
Ther
ear
enochangesI
’
m af
rai
dit
’s
t
imewel
ethergo”
“
Lethergof
orwhat
?Ungaz
odakwa
msunuwakho!
”
“
MrNgweny
ayouhav
etocal
m down”
“
Dontt
ell
met
ocal
m down!Dowhaty
ou
needt
odoasadoct
or!
”
“
Wedi
dal
lwecoul
dMrNgweny
aand
I
’
m af
rai
dthehospi
tal
can’
tkeepher
her
eanyl
onger
…”
“
Itol
dyouI
’
m wor
kingont
heget
ti
ng
moneyj
ustbepat
ientwi
thmepl
ease”
“
MrNgweny
a…”
“
Pleasedoct
orhav
eahear
tpl
ease”
“
OkayIwi
l
lgi
vey
ou24hour
sifbyt
hen
i
fyoudon’
thav
emoneyt
opayy
our
mom’
shospi
tal
bil
l
sthenI
’
m af
rai
dwe
wi
l
lhav
etoswi
tchof
fthemachi
neor
mov
ehert
othepubl
i
chospi
tal
”
“
Thanky
ou”Hewal
ksoutanddr
ivet
o
Mz
i’
spl
ace.
“
BraZ”
“
Shedoesn’
twantmenearherandt
he
hospi
tal
gav
eme24hour
s!Ican’
tlose
mymom Mz
i!Ineedt
odosomet
hing!I
needt
osav
eher
!”Hesay
spaci
ngup
anddownwhi
l
efl
i
nchi
nghi
sfi
sts.
“
Youneedt
ocal
m down”
“
Cal
m downkwani
mymom i
sdy
ingand
y
out
ell
i
ngmet
okal
m downnx
a!”
“
24hour
sisnotenoughweneedapl
an
asi
nnow”Mz
isay
s
“
Let
’ski
dnapt
hebl
i
ndgi
rlanddemanda
r
ansom.Iknowshewi
l
ldoany
thi
ngf
or
herdaught
er”Isay
“
Aransom wi
l
lbeasmal
lchangeZi
khal
i
af
tery
ouhav
epai
dyourmom’
sbi
l
ls
t
henwhat
?”
“
Mom i
sther
easonf
rom t
hef
ir
stpl
ace
wehav
etodot
hisMz
iwhyar
eyou
f
orget
ti
ngt
hat
!”
“
I’
m notf
orget
ti
ngt
hatbutbr
aZcome
onwhydemandf
ewhundr
edswhi
l
ewe
canownmi
l
li
ons.
”
“
Bongai
snoti
nter
est
edi
nmeMz
i!
”
“
Ihav
eapl
andontwor
ryIgoty
ou.
”

Ther
e’snot
hinghar
daswat
chi
ng
someoney
oul
ovehur
ti
ngbuty
oudon’
t
knowhowt
ohel
pthem ort
akeawayt
he
pai
nandi
t’
sdoesn’
thel
pwhent
heyar
e
shut
ti
ngy
ouout
.Soxf
ather
’spassed
awayy
est
erday
.I’
mtr
yingt
obe
suppor
ti
vet
ohi
m buthe’
spushi
ngme
away
.Icanseet
hathe’
shur
ti
ngbuthe
act
sli
kehe’
snot
.It
’shear
tbr
eaki
ngt
hat
henev
ergotachancet
oknowhi
sfat
her
.
“
Ithi
nky
oushoul
dgobackhome”
“
ButIwantt
osuppor
tyoubaby
”
“
Tomor
rowi
t’
sMondaynj
eyouar
e
supposedt
ogot
oschool
”
“
School
canwai
tIwi
l
lgetdoct
orsnot
e”
“
Okay
”
“
Wheni
sthef
uner
al?
”
“
Idon’
tknowbutwhatIknowi
sthati
t’
s
wi
l
lbeatEscour
tathi
shouse”
“
Sof
ar”
“
Yeah”
“
I’
m sor
ryf
ory
ourl
ossIknowy
ouar
e
hur
ti
ng”Hedoesn’
tsayany
thi
ngbut
wal
ksout
.It
akeahugebr
eat
heand
f
oll
owhi
m.Hi
scousi
nisnott
aki
ngt
he
deat
hofhi
suncl
ewel
lbutt
hegood
t
hingi
shehashi
swi
fewhoi
s
suppor
ti
nghi
m.Ij
oinMr
sXul
uwho’
s
cooki
ngi
ntheki
tchen
“
CanIhel
pyou”
“
Noy
ouar
epr
egnanty
oushoul
dbe
r
est
ing”
“
Howdi
dyouknow?
”
“
I’
m amot
herof4chi
l
drenGuguIcan
seeapr
egnantwoman”
“
ButIwantt
ohel
ppl
ease”shesi
ghs
“
Okayf
inepl
easepeel
thev
eggi
esf
or
me”Iwashmyhandsf
ir
stt
hendoas
shesay
s
“
Howi
sMpendul
ohol
dingup”
“
He’
shur
ti
ngbuthe’
sact
ingl
i
kehe’
s
not
”
“
Icani
magi
nehowbr
okenhemustbe.
Myhusbandi
snott
aki
ngi
twel
ltoo.Hi
s
uncl
ewasl
i
keaf
athert
ohi
m”
“
It
’sagoodt
hinghehasy
ouandhe’
s
nothi
dinghi
sfeel
i
ngsf
rom y
ouunl
i
ke
Mpendul
o.He’
sshout
ingmeout
”
“
Icani
magi
nehowf
rust
rat
ingt
hatmust
bef
ory
oubuthangi
nther
ehewi
l
lcome
ar
ound.
”Wef
all
int
osi
l
encef
ora
moment
“
I’
m sor
ryt
ocausear
if
tbet
weeny
our
sonandy
ourt
winsi
ster
’ssonIdi
dn’
t
knowIswear
”
“
It
’sokayGugu.I
’
mthel
astonet
ojudge
Ihav
edonet
hingsi
nmyl
i
feespeci
all
y
whenIwasy
oungt
hatI
’
m notpr
oudof
.”
“
Thanky
ouMr
sXul
u”
“
Itol
dyout
ocal
lmeZanez
inhl
e”
“
I’
m sor
ry”
“
Howf
arar
eyou?
”
“
8weeks,
I’
m car
ryi
ngt
wins”
“
Wowcongr
atul
ati
ons”
“
Thanky
ou”wehearabuz
zer
“
Ithi
nkt
hat
’smyauntshe’
sbr
ingi
ngmy
gr
anddaught
er,
shewasv
isi
ti
ngher
”She
say
swi
pingherhandswi
thadi
shcl
oth
t
henat
tendt
hev
isi
tor
s.Mi
nut
esl
ateI
hearv
oicest
hent
heywal
kin,
ther
e’san
ol
dli
ghtski
nnedwomanandMi
nni
e
who’
sMel
i
’sdaught
er,
yesheonce
i
ntr
oducedmet
oher
.
“
GogoImi
ssy
ou!
”Mi
nni
ejumpsatZane
“
Imi
ssedy
out
oobaby
”Zanesay
sand
ki
ssesherf
orehead
“
Gugut
hisi
smyAunt
,Aunt
yZesmeet
Gugu,
Mpendul
o’swi
fe.
”
“
Mpendul
oisQhawe’
suncl
e’
sson?
”
“
Yes”
“
Ohni
cet
omeety
oumt
anami
”
“
Nicet
omeey
ougogo”
“
LetmeputMi
nni
e’
sluggagei
nher
bedr
oom”Zanesay
sandwal
ksoutwi
th
Mi
nni
e.Icont
inuewi
thpeel
i
ngbutIcan
f
eel
Zane’
sAunt
y’
sgaz
eonme.
“
Whenar
eyougoi
ngt
ell
himt
het
rut
h?”I
l
ookupatherandshehast
hisl
ookt
hat
Ican’
tread
“
Excusemegogo?
”
“
Youhear
dme”
“
Idon’
tknowwhaty
ouar
etal
ki
ng
about
”shechuckl
es
“
Youwon’
tfi
ndpeaceunt
ily
oucome
cl
eant
oyourhusbandmygi
rl
”myhear
t
ski
psabeathowdoessheknow
“
Doesi
tmat
ter
?Whatmat
ter
sist
hat
y
out
ell
himt
het
rut
h.Whaty
oudi
dwas
cr
uel
howcany
oudenyachi
l
dher
f
ather
?Whatki
ndofamot
herar
eyou
goi
ngt
obet
oyourki
ds?Yourf
ri
end
nev
erwant
edy
ourhusbandev
eni
fshe
di
dyouhadnor
ightt
odowhaty
oudi
d.
Tel
lyourhusbandev
ery
thi
ng”I
’
m scar
ed
butIdeci
det
otakemychances
“
Eysal
ukwaz
indi
niphumaez
indabeni
z
ami
nomny
eni
wami
awuhl
angani
ndawo!
”(Eyol
dwomanst
ayoutofmy
husband’
sandmi
nebusi
nessi
t’
snone
ofy
ourbusi
ness!
)
“
Youar
epl
ayi
ngwi
thpeopl
e’
sli
fe
nt
ombaz
any
ana!Tel
lyourhusbandorI
wi
l
ltel
lhi
m my
sel
f!
”
CHAPTER68

“
Muuj
i
zav
uka!
”(Wakeup!
)shescr
eams
i
nmyear
.Gosht
hischi
l
d!I
'
llnev
erget
usedt
ohowsheal
way
swant
sev
ery
one
t
owakeupwhen’
ssheawake.
“
Kamar
iauy
arasa!
”(Youar
emaki
ng
noi
se!
)
“
Wakeupmommypl
ease,
I’
m hungr
y”I
gr
oanandbl
i
nksmyey
esopen.
“
Goodmor
ningmommy
”Shesmi
l
es
sweet
ly,
shehasawayofmaki
ngmy
hear
tmel
t.
“
Mor
ningmoonl
i
ght
,howdi
dyou
sl
eep?
”
“
Isl
eptokayandy
ou?
”
“
Met
oo,
let
’sf
reshenupt
henwewi
l
lgo
makebr
eakf
ast
”wer
oll
outofbedandI
t
ryt
omakei
tli
kemom showedme
y
est
erday
.It
’snothar
dwor
kyaz
,
st
rai
ght
eni
ngt
hecov
ersnj
ethatal
l
.
Oncewear
efi
nishedwewal
ktot
he
bat
hroom,
Iwashherf
acef
ir
stbef
ore
washi
ngmi
net
henwebr
ushourt
eet
h
bef
oreheadi
ngt
otheki
tchent
omake
br
eakf
astt
oget
her
.Il
ovemydaught
er,
shei
sal
way
swi
l
li
ngt
ohel
p,Ipr
ayshe
doesn'
tchangewhenshe’
sol
d.
“
Mommyt
hechi
ckensneedt
oeatt
oo”
ohsnap!Ihav
efor
got
tenaboutt
he
chi
ckenswedi
dn’
ttaket
hem outoft
he
boxi
nthebooty
est
erday
.I’
m sur
ethey
suf
focat
edt
odeat
handIt
hinkmom i
s
usi
ngt
hesamecart
hathadt
he
chi
ckens
“
Goandt
akemyphonei
nmybedr
oom
soIcancal
lmamat
ocheckony
our
chi
ckensi
ntheboot
”sher
unsof
f.Idi
sh
upourf
oodandpourmi
l
kint
hegl
asses
t
henputev
ery
thi
ngi
nthet
ray
.Iwal
kto
t
hel
i
vingr
oom t
hat
’swher
ewewi
l
leat
becauseIwantt
owat
cht
v.
“
Mommy
!”
“
Overher
ebaby
!”
Shemakesherwayi
nassheIset
tl
eson
t
hecouchandt
aket
her
emot
ethen
swi
tchi
ton.If
li
pthr
ought
hechannel
s
unt
ilKamar
iat
ell
smet
ost
oponsome
car
toons.
“
Comel
et’
seat
”Shesi
tsnex
ttomeand
gi
vesmemyphone.Idi
almama.
“
Baby
”
“
Heymamaar
eyougood”
“
Yesandy
ou?
”
“
I’
m al
sof
ine”
“
Kam Kam y
ena?
”
“
She’
sal
sof
inebutshe’
swor
ri
edabout
herchi
ckens”
“
OhmyIhav
efor
got
tenaboutt
hose
chi
ckens,
Iwi
l
lcheckont
hem now”
“
Wher
ear
eyou”
“
Att
hehospi
tal
”
“
Howi
suncl
eK”
“
Hest
il
lthesame,
I’
mrunni
ngoutof
f
ait
hnow”
“
Don’
tsayt
hatmama,
it’
stoosoont
o
gi
veuponhi
m al
ready
.Hewi
l
lwakeup
hehast
o.Youwantmet
ocomet
her
e?”
“
NobabyIwi
l
lbeokay
”
“
Tel
luncl
eKt
hatIl
ovehi
m somuchand
t
hathehast
owakeupbecauseont
he
weekendi
t’
sEmi
hle’
sbi
rt
hday
.Hehas
t
obeawakeonhi
sdaught
er’
sbi
rt
hday
”
“
Ohy
esGod,
Ial
mostf
orgot
.Iwi
l
lgo
checkonhert
oday
”
“
Pleasedoanddon’
tfor
gett
ogett
hose
chi
ckensmai
zer
ight
”
“
Iwon’
tar
eyoudoi
ngokayt
her
e?I
fyou
can’
tfi
ndany
thi
ngt
ell
me”
“
Sof
arsogoodmamaI
’
m st
il
lusi
ngmy
senseoft
oucht
oident
it
yot
heri
tems”
“
Okaysweet
hear
tIhav
etogo”
“
ByeIl
ovey
ou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Ihangup
“
Whatdi
dshesay
?Ar
emychi
ckensst
il
l
okay
?”
“
Shewi
l
lcheckont
hem andbuyt
hem
mai
ze”
“
ButIwant
edt
obuymai
zemy
sel
fnz
ee”
Shesul
k
“
Finey
ouwi
l
lbuyi
twhent
hechi
ckens
hav
efi
nishedt
heonemom wi
l
lbuy
”
“
Okay
”mydaught
erandIeatbr
eakf
ast
whi
l
ewat
chi
nghercar
toonswhenwe
f
ini
shwewasht
hedi
shest
oget
her
.In
t
hatmomentIr
ecei
veacal
lfr
om
Lwenkosi
,hewant
sust
oex
plor
e
Dur
banandI
’
m soex
cit
ed.Ibat
hour
daught
erf
ir
stt
henmy
sel
f.I
t’
shal
fhour
l
aterwhenmycuddl
ecakesar
ri
ves.
“
Daddy
!”Shesay
srunni
ngt
ohi
m andhe
pi
cksherupandt
ickl
esher
“
Daddy
..
.st
op.
..
it
…”­shesay
sbet
ween
gi
ggl
es.Ican’
thel
pbutsmi
l
easIst
are
att
hem.Thel
ovet
heset
woshar
eisso
beaut
if
ulshameandIcoul
dn’
tbe
happi
er.Heput
sourdaught
erdownand
f
lashesasmi
l
eandIcan’
thel
pbut
r
etur
nit
.Godt
hisguyi
sgor
geousno
wonderhoeswanthi
m hi
ghandl
ow
mar
abany
il
eshamecozhe’
smi
ne.I
’
m
soi
nlov
ewi
thhi
sdeepsetofey
es.I
wal
kcl
osert
ohi
m,hepul
l
smet
ohi
m by
mywai
standwest
areateachot
her
deepal
l
owi
ngourey
est
ohav
ea
conv
ersat
ionknownbyt
hem onl
y.
“
Angel
facecl
osey
ourey
es”
“
WhyDaddy
?”
“
BecauseIsayso”
“
Okay
”Kamar
iacl
osesherey
es.
Lwenkosi
lower
shi
smout
htomi
neand
ourl
i
pscol
l
ide,
weki
sssl
owl
yanddeep.
Ihol
dhi
m cl
osert
omy
sel
f,f
ist
ingonhi
s
bodywar
merasourt
oungesmeetand
del
i
ght
ingi
neachot
her
.
“
SawbonaMaShwabada”Hesay
saf
ter
br
eaki
ngt
heki
ss.Hi
sey
esar
ebar
ley
openhel
ookssocut
eri
ghtnow.
“
BabNkosi
”Iwhi
sperst
il
ltr
yingt
o
r
ecov
erf
rom t
hebr
eat
htaki
ngki
ss.
“
Youhav
enoi
deahowy
out
urnmeon
wheny
oucal
lmet
hat.Iwannar
ipof
f
t
hisj
umpsui
tofy
our
sandbendy
ou
ov
er”mycheeksf
lushed
“
DaddycanIopenmyey
esnow?
”
Kamar
iasay
sandwepul
lapar
t.
“
Yesangel
face”sheopensherey
esand
l
ookar
ound
“
Wher
eisi
t?”
“
What
?”Iask
“
Asur
pri
semosdaddysai
dImustcl
ose
myey
es”Lwenkosi
andIgi
ggl
e
“
Ideci
dedt
hatIwi
l
lgi
vey
oul
atert
oday
”
Lwenkosi
say
s
“
Theny
ouhav
etot
ell
mewhati
tis”
“
It
’sasur
pri
senj
e”
“
Iwantt
oseei
tnowdaddy
”shecr
osses
herar
msagai
nstherchest
.Lwenkosi
cr
ouchesbef
oreher
“
Thet
hingi
sIdi
dn’
tbuySnoany
thi
ng
shewi
l
lcr
yifIgi
vey
out
hissur
pri
se
al
onesomommyandIwi
l
lgobuyher
s
aswel
lthenwewi
l
lgi
vey
oubot
hlat
er”
“
Ohokay
”
“
Ilov
eyouangel
face”
“
Ilov
eyout
oodaddy
”Hepl
ant
sapeck
onherl
i
psbef
orepul
l
ingheri
ntohi
s
ar
ms.
“
Wher
ear
eyout
aki
ngmet
oo?
”
“
Wegoi
ngt
oex
plor
eDur
banbaby
”
“
Letmef
etchmyphone”Igogetmy
phonei
nmybedr
oom t
henwel
eav
e.We
st
artbydr
oppi
ngof
fKamar
iaat
Lwenkosi
’
shouse.Mom Zowi
l
lbabysi
t
herpl
usSnoi
sal
sot
her
e.
“
Sowhathasbeenbot
her
ingy
ou,
my
cuddl
ecakes”
“
Ifeel
li
keI
’
m cur
sedbaby
”
“
Whywoul
dyousayt
hat
?”
“
Myki
dsal
way
sdi
enj
e”
“
Wher
edoest
hiscomef
rom”He
ex
plai
nst
omeabouthowhemet
Ay
andaandsof
ort
h.Icanseehowhur
t
hei
saboutt
his
“
Ohmyl
oveI
’
m sor
ry”
“
Howcoul
dAy
andadot
hisbabyhuh?
Howcansheki
l
lani
nnocentsoul
?”
“
May
beshewasscar
edst
handwasami
”
“
Shewassupposedt
otel
lmeMi
ra,
not
deci
deonherownt
oki
l
lmybaby
!”Isi
gh
andsqueez
ehi
sthi
gh
“
Iknowbaby
,IknowandI
’
mver
ysor
ry.
Pl
easedon’
tyouev
ert
hinky
ouar
e
cur
sedsucht
hingshappensandI
bel
i
evet
heyhappenf
orr
easons.One
dayal
loft
hiswi
l
lmakesense”Hel
ooks
atmeandsmi
l
e
“
Ngi
yakut
handa”(
Ilov
eyou)
“
Ilov
eyousomuchmor
e”If
eel
sor
ryf
or
mycuddl
ecakesbutI
’
m gl
adAy
anda
abor
tedt
hebaby
,don’
tgetmewr
ong,
I
hav
ebeent
hrought
hebabymama
dr
amawi
thNandi
Ican’
tgot
hrought
hat
shi
tagai
nespeci
all
ynotwi
thmysi
ster
.
Cant
heuni
ver
sej
ustl
etmeandmy
cuddl
ecakeshappynow,
wehav
ebeen
t
hroughal
oti
ndi
vi
dual
l
yaswel
lasa
coupl
e.I
t’
sti
mef
orusnowt
obehappy
andenj
oyourl
ovewi
thoutanybaby
mamadr
amaorany
thi
ngf
ort
hatmat
ter
.
Ourf
ir
stadv
ent
urei
sawal
kont
hesky
atMosesMabhi
dast
adi
um whi
ch
al
l
owsmet
oseebeaut
if
ulv
iewsoft
he
ci
ty.
“
Ohmywor
ldbabyt
hisi
sincr
edi
ble!
”I
gaspi
nawe.If
eel
li
keIhav
ebeenl
i
ving
i
nthedar
knessandmi
ssi
ngoutont
he
beaut
yoft
hewor
ldf
oral
most24y
ear
s
ofmyl
i
fe
“
Heybaby
,don’
tcr
y”Hewi
pesmyt
ear
s
“
I’
mjust
…”Ibur
sti
ntot
ear
s,hepr
esses
meagai
nsthi
schestandhol
dsme
t
ight
ly.
“
It
’sokaymyl
ovedon’
tcr
yshhh”He
st
rokesmybackunt
ilIcal
m down.Ipul
l
backandhewi
pesmyt
ear
swi
thhi
s
t
humbs
“
Ungakhal
ij
ustembr
acey
oursi
ghtand
enj
oyy
ezwa”Inodwi
thmyheadandhe
ki
ssesmynose.
“
Let
’st
akesel
fi
escome”Het
akesout
hi
sphoneandwet
akesel
fi
es,
he
makesmedoal
lsor
toff
unnyf
aces.Our
nex
tadv
ent
urei
standem bi
ki
ngdown
Dur
ban’
ssceni
cbeachf
rontenj
oyi
ngt
he
f
eel
ofseabr
eez
eal
ongt
heGol
denMi
l
e.
I
’
m hav
ingabeaut
if
ulmomentofmyl
i
fe.
Af
terbi
ki
ngwegot
owat
chamov
ieby
t
het
imet
hemov
ieendsi
t’
sal
readyl
ate
anddar
kout
sideaf
teral
li
tswi
nter
.I
knowmom i
sfr
eaki
ngoutnowbut
t
odayi
t’
saboutmeandmycuddl
e
cakes.Iwi
l
ldeal
wit
hherwhenIgoback
home.It
houghtt
hatwasal
lfort
heday
andhe’
staki
ngmebackhomebutni
gga
hadsetupcandl
eli
ghtdi
nneri
nbedat
t
hehot
el.
“
Wowbabyt
hisi
samaz
ing”
“
Youar
eamaz
ingmyl
ove”Heki
ssesmy
cheekandhel
pmesi
tdownont
hebed
t
hent
akeof
fmysandal
s.Hej
oinsme
andwedi
neov
erasweetchat
.
“
Ihadwonder
ful
dayofmyl
i
febaby
t
hanky
ousomuch.Thanky
ouf
orbei
ng
pr
esenti
nmyl
i
fe,
thanky
ouf
or
choosi
ngmeoutoft
hegi
rl
sint
hewor
ld,
t
hanky
ouf
orbei
ngmyshoul
dert
ocr
y
on,
thanky
ouf
oral
lthel
oveandj
oyy
ou
br
ingi
nmyl
i
fe.Il
ovey
ousomuch
Lwandl
elwenkosi
Nkosi
from t
hedept
h
ofhear
tandsoul
.”
“
Nowy
ouar
emaki
ngmebl
ush”Igi
ggl
e
asIl
ookathi
m bl
ushi
ng
“
Youar
esocut
e”
“
Cut
e?I
’
m notababy
”
“
Youar
emybaby
”Hecapt
uresmyl
i
ps
i
ntohi
sandweki
sssl
owl
y,t
ounges
t
hrust
ingi
nandoutofeachot
her
’s
mout
h.Myhandsi
nvol
unt
ari
l
yhol
dshi
s
f
aceast
heki
ssdeepenscr
eat
ingwar
m
f
eel
i
ngt
hroughoutmybody
.Heposi
ti
on
hi
msel
font
opofmewi
thoutbr
eaki
ng
t
hescor
chi
ngki
ssIf
eel
hiscock
har
deni
ngagai
nstmynun.I
naspl
i
t
secondcl
othesar
eof
fourbodi
esand
he’
sonl
yinhi
sbr
ief
s.Hi
sbul
gingcock
i
nhi
sbr
ief
smakesmewonderhowbi
g
doeshel
ook.Hepour
schocol
atesy
rup
al
lov
ermybodyandt
akeast
rawber
ry,
poppi
ngi
tinhi
smout
hbef
orepr
essi
ng
hi
sli
psonmi
neal
l
owi
ngmet
oshar
e
t
hesweet
nessoft
het
hest
rawber
ry
t
hroughasul
tr
yki
sst
hatl
eav
esme
gaspi
ngashi
smout
hescapemymout
h
andl
i
ckst
hechocol
atesy
ruponmy
boobsgoi
ngdownt
omyt
ummyt
henup
agai
ntomybr
east
.If
eel
tingl
einmycl
i
t
andwar
mthgr
owi
ngbet
weenmyt
highs,
t
hewar
mthofhi
stongueagai
nstmy
ni
ppl
esmakesmeshi
verwi
thdel
i
ght
.
Hesuckandbi
tesonmyni
ppl
esunt
ilI
f
eel
them acheandget
ti
nghar
d,amoan
Ihav
ebeenhol
dingi
nInv
olunt
ari
l
ysl
i
ps
outofmyl
i
ps.
“
Ahhhhbaby
”I’
m dr
ippi
ngwetal
lIwant
i
shi
m deepi
nmycuntnowbutIcansee
t
hatt
odayhe’
snotgoi
ngt
ofuckmebut
makel
ovet
omysoul
.Heki
sseshi
sway
downandspr
eadmyl
egsapar
t
“
Hav
eIev
ert
oldy
ouhowbeaut
if
uly
our
pussyi
sbaby
”Il
ookathi
m,hi
sey
es
ar
egl
i
steni
ngwi
thl
ust
“
No”Ishakemyheadbi
ti
ngmyl
owerl
i
p.
“
Your
..
..
..
pussy
..
.i
s..
.so.
.beaut
if
ul”He
say
sbet
weenki
sses,
trai
l
inghi
stongue
i
nsi
deofmyt
highs.Hej
umpsdown
f
rom t
hebedt
henpul
l
smet
otheedge
oft
hebedaf
terf
li
ppi
ngmeov
er.He
j
erksmeupI
’
m onbackf
li
pposi
ti
on,
l
egsonhi
sshoul
der
s,handsbal
anci
ng
ont
hebedandmyassont
heai
ragai
nst
hi
sface.If
eel
hist
oungel
i
cki
ngi
nsmal
l
ci
rcl
es,
aroundmycl
i
tthenhet
akesi
tin
hi
smout
hgent
lysucki
ngoni
t.Ican’
t
st
opmy
sel
ffr
om moani
ngIf
eel
li
keI
’
m
goi
ngt
olosecont
rol
ofmy
sel
f.He
sl
i
deshi
stonguef
rom mypussy
hol
eto
myasshol
eov
erandov
er,
taki
ngev
ery
bi
tofst
rengt
hinmybody
.
“
Oohhhhbaby
!”Icanf
eel
myar
ms
st
art
ingt
oacheduet
omyhol
dont
he
bedbutheyt
heywi
l
lsur
viv
e.Iar
chmy
pussyal
l
owi
nghi
mtodohi
smagi
cwi
th
hi
stongue,I
minbr
inkofer
upt
ingand
mymoanshav
egr
owni
ntocr
ies.He
t
hrust
shi
stoungei
nandoutdeeperand
f
ast
erIf
eel
asuddenr
ushofbl
oodi
n
myhead.I
’
m al
mostt
her
e..
yesss!I
r
eleaseani
ntenseor
gasm i
nhi
smout
h.
Hel
i
cksmedr
yandputmeonmyback
ont
hebedt
hent
akesof
fhi
sbr
ief
s.I
gaspwi
thshockashi
scockspr
ingsout
f
reel
y.OhmyGodhel
ooksbi
ggerand
l
ongert
henhef
eel
s
“
Do.
.do.
..
don’
ttel
lmet
haty
ouhav
e
beenput
ti
ngt
hatt
hingofy
our
sint
o
me?
”
“
Ofcour
seIhav
ebeenput
ti
ngi
tiny
ou
doy
oul
i
kei
t”Hesay
swi
thasmi
rkon
hi
sfaceashest
rokeshi
ssnake.Iswear
i
t’
sar
eal
anacondadon’
taskmewher
e
Ihav
eseeni
t!mysenseoft
ouchwasn’
t
decei
vi
ngmei
t’
ssnakei
ndeed!
“
No!
”
“
No?
”Hel
i
ckshi
sli
ps
“
Ist
hist
heoney
ouhav
ebeenusi
ngal
l
al
ong”Hebur
sti
ntol
aught
ert
hrowi
ng
hi
sheadback
“
NoIhav
eanot
herdi
ck….
ofcour
sebaby
Ihav
eonedi
ck”
“
Ohmywor
ldI
t’
slooksbi
ggerand
l
ongert
heni
t’
sfeel
sImusthav
eadeep
bi
ghol
emosf
ort
hatt
hingofy
our
stof
it
i
ntome”Isaywi
thal
ookofwor
ry
“
Nobabyy
oudon’
thav
eabi
ghol
ea
v
agi
nai
sel
ast
ic,
it’
scanst
ret
cht
o
accommodat
eanysi
zeofadi
ckandgo
backt
oit
snor
mal
siz
eagai
n.”
“
Oh”Het
akesar
ubberandputi
ton
“
Sondel
ast
handwasami
”(comecl
oser
myl
ove)Ibr
eat
hei
ndeepl
ytr
yingi
nvai
n
t
oset
tl
emyhear
trat
e.
“
Rel
axokaykusasey
iyoi
nyokany
oka
y
akho”
“
Lemnandi
”Hesmi
rksandnodst
henwe
ki
sswhi
l
eher
ubshi
msel
fonmywet
ent
rance
“
Arey
our
eady
”Inodwi
thmyheadt
hen
heent
ersmesl
owl
ymywal
l
sst
ret
ches
t
oaccommodat
ehi
shar
dlongl
engt
h
i
ntome.Igaspandhol
dont
ohi
mti
ght
.
Hest
art
srol
l
inghi
shi
psi
ncr
easi
nghi
s
pace.
“
Ohshi
t!
”Icanf
eel
mybodyr
elax
ingas
pl
easur
etakeov
ermywhol
ebody
.
Damn!Ipr
obemy
sel
fupwi
thmyel
bows
andseehi
sdi
ckt
hrust
ingi
nandoutof
mycuntoht
hatsendsmeov
ert
heedge
ofsani
ty
“
Ahhhhy
esssohhhLwe.
..
ekosi
!”
“
Uyay
izwababy
”(cany
ouf
eel
it)
“
Ohy
esbaby
!Ahhh!
”
“
Inj
ani
?”(
Howi
sit
?)
“
Imnandi
”(i
tssogood)
“
Angi
kuz
wami
na”(
Ican’
theary
ou)
“
Imnandi
kakhhhhhul
uuu!
”(I
tssooo
goood!
)Hepul
l
smeupandbendme
ov
er
“
Touchy
ourt
oes”I
tcomesoutasa
commandandIobeyhi
m.Het
apshi
s
di
ckonmywetcuntaf
ewt
imest
hen
shov
eitdeepi
nsi
deofme,
fil
l
ingal
lof
mewi
thonet
hrust
.Iscr
eam hol
ding
t
ight
lyonmyt
oeshest
art
spoundi
ng
mehar
derandhar
derIsweart
hisman
i
sgoi
ngt
oki
l
lmewi
thsheerecst
asy
.
“
Iwi
l
lpayal
obol
afory
ourdi
ckbaby
ahhhohhy
essaweemah!
”Hi
sdi
ck
deser
vesar
ewar
dofgr
ati
tude,
damn
he’
sonf
ir
e.Icanev
ensl
aught
eracow
anddoahugecer
emonyj
ustt
oshow
appr
eci
ati
onandt
hankhi
spar
ent
s
ngokungi
zal
elai
ndoda.
“
Fuckmydol
l
facey
ouar
esooohot
!!
!”
Hespanksmybut
tandsi
tsont
hebed.I
st
raddl
ehi
m,i
nser
ti
nghi
scocki
ntome
sl
owl
ythenst
artbounci
ngupanddown,
ey
esl
ockedoneachot
her
.Hehol
dsmy
but
tockst
ight
lyandmov
einsy
nct
o
meetmyt
hrust
s.
“
Ilov
eyoumaShwabada”
“
Ilov
eyousomuchmor
eBabNkosi
”
Oursweat
ybodi
esr
ockt
oget
herl
i
kea
chor
us,
bui
l
dingt
othecr
escendot
hati
s
aboutt
ohappen.Wear
eli
ket
wo
mol
dedi
ntooneandwecompl
eteeach
ot
herper
fect
ly.Icapt
urehi
sli
psi
nto
mi
neandweki
ss,
swal
l
owi
ngeach
ot
her
’smoansi
nourt
hroat
s.Thewav
e
ofpl
easur
ehi
tushar
d,weex
plodei
n
eachot
her
’sar
ms.

-
Ihangupaf
tert
alki
ngt
omydaught
er
andl
ookatmyf
iancéi
nfr
ontme.
“
ThatwasMi
rashewasr
emi
ndi
ngme
aboutEmmy
’sbi
rt
hdayont
heweekend,
y
ouneedt
owakeupst
handwasami
pl
ease”Iki
sshi
shand
“
Khuz
ani
pleasewakeup,
youhav
etobe
t
her
eforourdaught
er’
sbi
rt
hday
,fi
ght
I
’
m beggi
ngy
ou.Doi
tforher
ngi
yakucel
a”Ii
nhal
edeepl
y.
“
Mydadgav
eKamar
iaandMi
ra
chi
ckenswef
orgott
ogett
hem outof
t
hebooty
est
erdaysoI
’
m goi
ngt
ocheck
ont
hem,
Iwi
l
lbebacknow”Igetupand
makemywayt
othepar
kingl
ot.Iopen
t
hebootandl
ooki
nsi
det
hebox
.Thank
Godt
heyar
est
il
lal
i
veKamar
iawoul
d
hav
eki
l
ledme.I
’
m pl
anni
ngt
osl
eep
her
ebutnowIhav
etot
aket
hechi
ckens
homeaf
terbuy
ingmai
zet
henIwi
l
l
comeback.If
eel
presencebehi
ndme
j
ustasI
’
m aboutt
otur
nar
ound
someonesuf
focat
esmeIt
ryt
ofi
ghtbut
I
’
m get
ti
ngweakerandweakerunt
ilI
l
osemyconsci
ousness.

“
Hai
boAunt
ywhyar
eyoushout
ingat
myguest
?”Zanesay
sasshewal
ksi
n.
“
Iwoul
dn’
tjustshoutatherf
orno
r
easonshecal
l
edmesal
ukaz
indi
ni!
”
Womany
ouar
eol
dvel
eory
ouwant
ed
met
osayt
shi
tshi
ndi
ni.Zanel
ooksat
meandIl
ookdowncont
inui
ngwi
thmy
peel
i
ng.
“
Youhav
etoconf
essev
ery
thi
ngbef
ore
i
t’
stool
ate”Gosht
hiswomancanshe
j
ustl
eav
emeal
one.I
’
m notconf
essi
ng
any
thi
ng.
“
Ify
ougoi
ngt
ogi
vemet
hatat
ti
tude,
I
won’
tgi
vey
ouachoi
cet
otel
lhi
m
y
our
sel
fIwi
l
ltel
lhi
m my
sel
f!
”
“
Whatar
eyout
alki
ngaboutAunt
y”
“
Askher
”
“
Guguwhathav
eyoudone?
”
“
Not
hingZaney
ouraunt
yisaccusi
ng
meoft
hingst
hatIhav
enoknowl
edge
of
.”Theol
dwomanchuckl
esand
shakesherhead
“
YouknowGugu,
myaunt
yisapr
ophet
shewoul
dn’
taccusey
ouofsomet
hing
y
oudi
dn’
tdo”IgaspIdi
dn’
tknow.The
chancesofSoxbel
i
evi
ngherar
ever
y
hi
ghIcan’
tri
skt
hat
.
“
Ofcour
sey
oudi
dn’
tknowy
ety
ouact
l
i
key
ouknowev
ery
thi
ng!Zanez
inhl
e
pl
easegi
vemeMpendul
o’scont
act
number
sIj
ustwantt
ohav
eachatwi
th
hi
m”
“
I’
m sor
rygogof
ordi
srespect
ingy
oumy
hor
monesar
epl
ayi
ngwi
thme”She
l
aughs
“
Thi
schi
l
dthi
nksI
’
m af
ool
for
getabout
t
hecont
actZaneIwi
l
lfi
ndhi
m my
sel
f.
”
Shesay
swal
ki
ngoutbutZanest
opsher
“
Aunt
yyoucantl
eav
eli
ket
hispl
ease
cal
m down”
“
Iyangey
isal
ent
ombaz
aneZane!
”(Thi
s
gi
rli
sdi
srespect
ingmeZane!
)
“
I’
m sor
rygogopl
easef
orgi
veme”I
’
m
nowonmykneesbeggi
ngher
.Thi
s
womancant
urnmyl
i
feupsi
dedowni
n
aspl
i
tsecondIcan’
tal
l
owt
hatI
fIhav
e
t
oli
ckherbut
tI’
ddot
hatwi
thout
hesi
tat
ion.
“
I’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
tmeant
odi
srespect
y
ou.Ican’
ttel
lmyhusbandIwi
l
llose
ev
ery
thi
ng.Ihav
enowher
etogo”Isob.
“
Getupf
rom t
hef
loor
”shesay
s
“
Pleasedon’
ttel
lonme,
I’
m beggi
ng
y
ou”
“
Getupf
rom t
hef
loorGugu”Zanehel
ps
meupf
rom t
hef
loor
.
“
Ngi
yax
oli
sa”(
I’
m sor
ry)
“
She’
ssor
ryAunt
,pl
easef
orgi
veher
”
“
Youcan’
thi
det
hisf
orev
erGugu,
the
t
rut
hhast
ocomeout
”
“
Ican’
tlosehi
m gogo,
myhusbandcan’
t
f
indoutaboutt
hispl
ease”I
’
m cr
ying
hy
ster
ical
l
y.
“
Let
’sgot
alkaboutt
hisi
nthel
i
ving
r
oom Aunt
y”Zanesay
sthenwemake
ourwayt
othel
oungeandset
tl
eont
he
couch.
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”Zane’
sAuntl
ooksat
me
“
Umhmyhusbandhasadaught
erwi
th
mybestf
ri
endsoIencour
agedhi
mto
doDNAt
estandt
emper
edwi
tht
heDNA
r
esul
ts.
”
“
YhooGugu”Zanesay
swi
thshock
wr
it
tenal
lov
erherf
ace
“
Iknowi
twascr
uel
butIwasscar
edt
o
l
osehi
m.Hewasat
tachedt
othechi
l
d
andi
tdi
dn’
thel
pthathel
ovesmybest
f
ri
endsomuch.Ihadt
odosomet
hing,
I
can’
tlosehi
m.He’
sal
lIhav
e.I
fhef
inds
out
,hewi
l
lchasemeoutont
hest
reet
andIwi
l
lhav
enowher
etogo”Iex
plai
n
bet
weensobs
“
OhGugu”Zanepul
l
smet
oherchest
andembr
acesme
“
Wher
e’sy
ourf
ami
l
y?”Zane’
saunt
y
asks
“
Myf
atherdi
sownedmebecauseIdi
dn’
t
wantt
odoBcom account
ingIwant
ed
j
our
nal
i
sm ofwhi
chI
’
m cur
rent
ly
st
udy
ingnowandmyhusbandi
spay
ing
f
ormyf
ees.Mymot
hersai
dnot
hing
whendadki
ckedmeoutoft
hehouse.
”
“
Hedi
sownedy
oubecausey
ouwant
ed
t
ofol
l
owy
ourpassi
onwhatki
ndofa
f
atheri
she?Idon’
tev
enwantt
o
ment
iony
ourmot
her
!”Zaneshout
s
“
Myhusbandcan’
tknowaboutt
his”
“
Hehast
oknowGugu,
hedeser
vest
o
know.I
nfactev
ery
onedeser
vest
oknow.
Youar
epl
ayi
ngwi
thpeopl
e’
sfeel
i
ngs.
Doy
out
hinkabouthowy
ourbestf
ri
end
wi
l
lfeel
whenshef
indoutt
het
rut
h?
Whataboutt
heboywho’
srai
singt
he
chi
l
dthi
nki
ngi
t'
shi
s?Idon’
tev
enwant
t
oment
iont
heconf
usi
ont
hel
i
ttl
egi
rl
wi
l
lgot
hrough,
shedoesn’
tdeser
vet
his
Gugu.Ev
ery
onedon’
tdeser
vet
his”
Zane’
sAuntsay
scal
mly
“
Ican’
tlosehi
m”
“
May
bey
ouwon’
tlosehi
m.Thet
rut
h
wi
l
lsety
ouf
reeasl
ongasy
ouar
e
keepi
ngt
hisy
ouwon’
tfi
ndpeace.
”
Zane’
sAuntsay
s
“
Iwi
l
llosehi
m gogo,
youdon’
tknowmy
husbandl
i
keIdo.Hewi
l
lhat
eme,
Ican’
t
hav
ethat
”
“
Thet
rut
hhast
ocomeoutandI
’
m
af
rai
dal
readyt
her
ear
econsequences
y
ouhav
etof
ace”Il
ookather
“
Whatconsequences?
”
“
Dot
her
ightt
hingmay
beGodandt
he
ancest
orswi
l
lsav
eyouandy
ourki
ds.I
hav
etogoZanemyhusbandi
snot
f
eel
i
ngwel
l
”shesay
sget
ti
ngupand
Zanedoest
hesamet
oo
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thuncl
eWakhe”
“
Oldagei
scat
chi
ngupwi
thhi
m and
uy
azi
utef
akanj
ani
”Theybot
hgi
ggl
eas
t
heywal
kout
.Igetupandheadupst
air
s
t
othebedr
oom.Icr
awl
ont
hebedand
cr
ymyl
ungsout
.Ev
ery
thi
ngi
sspi
ral
i
ng
outofcont
rol
now.I
fIknewIshoul
dn'
t
hav
ecomeher
enowI
’
mfor
cedt
otel
l
t
het
rut
h,t
het
rut
hthatwi
l
ldest
roymy
mar
ri
ageandt
akeawaymyeducat
ion,
atl
eastsi
sKhosi
lef
tmeahousebut
am Ipr
epar
edt
oloseev
ery
thi
ngnow
wi
thoutaf
ight
?
“
Gugu”Zanesay
sassheknocksont
he
doorbutIdon’
trepl
y.Iheart
hedoor
openi
ngt
henf
oot
stepsshuf
fl
ing
t
owar
dst
hebed.
“
OhGugudon’
tcr
ysi
si,
you'
rest
ressi
ng
t
heki
ds”shesi
tsnex
ttomeand
comf
ort
sme
“
Pleasehel
pmeZane,
Mpendul
ocan’
t
f
indoutaboutt
his”
“
Iwi
sht
her
ewasawayIcanhel
pyou
wi
thsi
s”
“
Tal
ktoy
ourauntandbegherf
ormet
o
nott
ell
myhusband”
“
Shewon’
ttel
lhi
m buty
ouwi
l
lhav
eto
t
ell
him.
”
“
IfIdon’
ttel
lhi
m,wi
l
lshet
ell
him?
”
“
Remembershesai
ddot
her
ightt
hing
may
bet
heancest
orsandGodwi
l
lsav
e
y
ouandy
ourchi
l
dren.
”
“
Doest
hatmeanmyki
dsar
eindanger
?”
“
Idon’
tknowbutwhatIcant
ell
youi
s
comecl
eanf
ort
hesakeofy
ourki
ds”
“
Idon’
tknowZane,
Ireal
l
ydon’
tknow”I
cr
y
“
Shhhdon’
tcr
yit
’sgoi
ngt
obeokay
”
Not
hingwi
l
lev
erbeokay
“
CanIbeal
onepl
ease”
“
Ofcour
se”shej
umpsdownf
rom t
he
bedandheadout
.Il
eti
tal
loutunt
ilI
dr
if
tint
osl
umber
.I’
m wokenupbymy
husband.
“
Wakeupi
tst
imef
ordi
nner
”
“
Whatt
imei
sit
?”
“
Hal
fpastsev
en”Ir
oll
outofbedand
wal
ktot
hebat
hroom t
ori
nsemyf
ace
andmymout
hthenwal
kbackt
othe
bedr
oom.
“
Arey
ouokay
”myhusbandsay
slooki
ng
atmewi
thsomuchconcer
n.Iknowmy
ey
esar
eswol
l
enf
rom al
lthecr
ying.
“
I’
mfi
ne,
Ijustmi
ssmymom”Ir
eal
l
ydo
mi
ssmymom Iwi
shIcanbei
nher
embr
acei
nthi
smoment
.Ev
erygi
rl
needshermot
hernomat
terhowangr
yI
canbeatherf
ornotst
andi
ngupf
orme
t
omyf
atherIneedherr
ightnow.
“
OhbabyI
’
m sor
ry”Hepul
l
smet
ohi
s
ar
msandhol
dsmet
ight
ly.
“
IknowIcannev
erf
il
lupy
ourmom’
s
v
oidbutI
’
m her
efory
ouokaynomat
ter
whatIwi
l
lal
way
sbeher
efory
ou”Ipul
l
backandl
ookathi
m
“
Doy
our
eal
l
ymeant
hat
,nomat
ter
what
?”
“
Ofcour
semyl
ove”Ipul
lhi
m wi
tht
he
backofhi
sneckandki
sshi
m,he
cat
chesonourt
oungesdancet
o
unknownt
une.Ican’
tlosehi
m,
somet
hinghav
etobedonebutIdon’
t
knowwhat
.HowIwi
shsi
sKhosi
was
her
eshehadpl
ansf
orday
sthatone.
Sheshar
edwi
thmeaboutherpastbut
t
hat
’sf
orast
oryf
oranot
herday
.We
br
eakt
heki
ssandl
ookateachot
heri
n
t
heey
esf
oramomentbef
orewal
ki
ng
downst
air
sfordi
nner
.Ev
ery
onei
s
al
readygat
her
edbyt
het
abl
eev
en
Londi
siz
weofwhi
chIdi
dn’
tknowi
s
backf
rom KZN.Hel
ooksatmeand
chuckl
es
“
Greet
ings”Isayandsi
tdownaf
termy
husbandhaspul
loutachai
rforme
“
IthoughtMel
ii
sly
ing…”
“
Londi
siz
wewet
alkedaboutt
his”
Qhawesay
s.Soxsi
tsnex
ttome
“
Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ngnowGugu?
”Zane
asks
“
Ifeel
bet
tert
hanky
ou”Idi
shupf
ormy
husbandandIwhi
l
eZanedoest
he
samef
orherhusbandand
gr
anddaught
er.Theboy
sar
edi
shi
ngup
f
ort
hemsel
ves
“
Mabhebez
akadaddybl
esst
hef
ood”
Mel
isay
stohi
sdaught
erwhobl
esses
t
hef
oodt
her
eaf
ter
.Wei
ndul
geov
era
l
i
ghtchat
.
“
Howi
smydaught
erLondi
siz
we?
”
“
She’
sokaymama”
“
Wheni
sshecomi
ngbackhomebut
iI
mi
ssher
”Nkay
ezi
say
s
“
Shedi
dn’
tsaybutI
’
m sur
esoonshe
wi
l
l”
“
Heeebut
iLondi
siz
wedi
dyouseet
hat
y
ourgi
rl
fr
iendgai
nedhersi
ght
!”say
s
Nkany
ezi
“
Londi
hasabl
i
ndgi
rl
fr
iend?
”Zaneasks
“
Yesmom t
hesi
nger
,what
’shername?
”
“
Mir
acl
e”Mel
i
siz
wer
epl
i
es
“
Mir
aisy
ourgi
rl
fr
iend?
”Soxasks
l
ooki
ngatLondi
siz
we
“
Ithoughtt
hatgi
rli
sseei
ngt
heact
or,
what
'shi
snameLwandl
eorsomet
hing
l
i
ket
hat
”Qhaweadds“
Nkany
ezi
isl
yi
ng
dadshe’
snotmygi
rl
fr
iend”
“
Buty
ouar
ecr
ushi
ngonher
!”Nkany
ezi
say
swi
thasmi
rkonhi
sface
“
Arey
ounotherbossLondi
forcr
ushi
ng
onher
?”Qhaweasksgi
vi
nghi
ssona
l
ook
“
Canwehol
donasecond,
didy
ousay
Mi
ragai
nedhersi
ght
?”Ii
nter
ject
“
Yesi
t’
str
endi
ngonsoci
alnet
wor
ks”
Nkany
ezi
repl
i
es
“
Youar
ely
ingMi
racansee?
”Soxasks
cl
ear
lyshockbywhatNkany
ezi
shar
ed
“
Yes.
..
see”Nkany
ezi
giv
esSoxhi
s
phone,
Iti
l
tmyheadasi
det
olookatt
he
scr
eenont
hephone.Lwandl
elwenkosi
post
edav
ideooft
hem.Capt
ioned:
‘
Expl
ori
ngDur
bswi
tht
hel
oveofmyl
i
fe
showi
nghert
hebeaut
yoft
heci
tyf
or
t
hef
ir
stt
imeaf
ter24y
ear
sofbei
ng
bl
i
ndnowshecansee!#Mi
racl
eSea.
’
Thecomment
sar
epi
l
ingup,
Idon’
tev
en
wantt
oment
ionshar
esandv
iewsov
er
200k.Peopl
ear
est
unnedaboutMi
racl
e
mi
racul
ousl
ygai
ninghersi
ghtandt
hey
wantt
oknowhow.
“
Wowmt
wanacansee!
”Soxsay
s
ex
cit
edl
y,Il
ookathi
m andhecl
ear
shi
s
t
hroatandgi
vesNkany
ezi
thephone.
“
Thi
sisami
racl
e”Zanesay
s
“
Justl
i
kehername!
”ThewaySoxi
s
happy
,hecan’
tev
enhi
dei
t.If
eel
needl
espi
erci
ngi
nmyhear
t.Ther
estof
t
hedi
nneri
sonaboutMi
ragai
ningher
si
ghtandI
’
m notenj
oyi
ngmyf
oodat
t
hismoment
.I’
m happyf
orher
,Ir
eal
l
y
am butwhati
snotsi
tt
ingwel
lwi
thme
i
sthewaymyhusbandi
s.
“
Excuseme”Isayget
ti
ngup.Ican’
tsi
t
her
eandl
i
stent
omyhusbandbr
aggi
ng
aboutMi
raasi
fI’
m nother
e.Imakemy
wayupt
hest
air
sandwal
ktot
he
bedr
oom.It
ryt
ocal
lsi
sKhosi
andmy
hear
tleapswi
thj
oywhenherphone
r
ings
“
Hel
l
ooo”
“
Heysi
sKhosi
howar
eyou”
“
Uhm goo.
.sooogoodahhshi
t!
”OhGod
don’
ttel
lmeshe’
shav
ingsex!
“
Wear
eint
roubl
esomepr
ophetwantt
o
t
ell
oursecr
ety
ouneedt
ocomeback
pl
ease”
“
What
everhappensdon’
tment
ionmy
nameohhh!
”
“
Comebacksot
hatwewi
l
lseehowdo
wegetoutoft
hist
oget
herpl
ease”
“
I’
m..
notcomi
ngback.
.Gugu.
.j
ust
..
.o­
h
f
uck!Bonanaweuphumakanj
ani
but
don’
tment
ionmyname!
”
“
HowcanInotment
iony
ournamey
ou
ar
etheonewhohel
pedmef
akedt
he
DNAr
esul
ts!Shoul
dthet
rut
hcomeoutI
wi
l
ltel
lthaty
ouhel
pedmet
emper
ed
wi
thKamar
ia’
sDNAr
esul
tssocome
backpl
easemyhusbandcan’
tfi
ndout
aboutt
hisandy
ouwi
l
lal
sol
osey
our
l
i
censei
fthet
rut
hcomesout
”Iheart
he
doorshut
ti
ngIswi
vel
aroundandsee
myhusbandl
ooki
ngatme.Howl
ong
hasbeenst
andi
ngt
her
e?Ohshi
t!
CHAPTER69

I
'
m shaki
ngi
nfearwonder
inghowl
ong
hashebeenst
andi
ngt
her
e.I
’
m unabl
e
t
odeci
pherhi
semot
ionsr
ightnow,
he’
s
notgi
vi
ngmeany
thi
ngandI
’
m
wonder
inghowmuchhehear
d.
“
Ba.
..
baby
”
“
Tel
lmewhatIj
usthear
disnott
rue
Gugu”Hesay
scl
enchi
nghi
sjaws
“
Idon’
tknowwhaty
ouhear
dbaby
”Isay
wi
thashakyv
oice
“
Don'
tyoudar
emakemey
ourf
ool
Gugul
ethuNcube!
!”Her
oar
scausi
ngme
t
ojumpabi
t.
“
Whatdi
dyouhear
?”Ineedt
oknowhow
muchheknowsf
ir
st,
whati
fIsel
lmy
sel
f
outonl
yfi
ndouthehear
dnot
hing
“
Gugudi
dyout
emperwi
thKamar
ia’
s
DNAr
esul
ts!
”Ohshi
thehear
d
ev
ery
thi
ng
”
I’
m sosor
rybaby
”
“
Ohwow!
”Hel
aughsl
i
ker
eal
l
yhar
d
“
I'
m sor
ryMpe….
”Hecut
smeshor
t
“
Idon’
tunder
stand,
howdi
dal
loft
his
happen?Doest
hismeant
hatDr
Mkhwanaz
ili
edt
ome?
”Inodmyhead
asIsob
“
Sti
l
lIdon’
tgeti
t,ImeanLwandl
e’
s
mom di
dthet
estt
ooandLwandl
e'
s
camebackposi
ti
ve”Hel
ooksatmewi
th
somuchr
age
“
D…DrMkhwanaz
iandmom Zowor
kat
t
hesamehospi
tal
soshemanagedt
o
t
emperwi
tht
her
esul
ts,
henceLwandl
e'
s
camebackposi
ti
venoty
our
s”Il
ook
downasshameengul
fsme
“
Soi
not
herwor
dsKamar
iai
smy
daught
er?
”
“
I’
m sor
rybaby
…”
“
Iaskedy
ouadamnquest
ionGugu,
is
Kamar
iami
ne!
??”Heshr
iekswi
thanger
“
Yes”Isob
“
Howcoul
dyouGuguhuh!Howcoul
d
y
oubesocr
uel
!YazIwassosur
ethat
Kamar
iai
smi
ne!It
houghty
oudi
dn’
t
wantmet
ogot
hrought
hesameshi
tof
r
aisi
ngachi
l
dthat
’snotmi
nebecause
y
oucar
eandl
ovemekant
iyouknew
y
ouwer
etr
icki
ngme!
”It
houghtI
'
ve
seenhi
sangert
hedayIt
oldhi
m about
my
sel
fandKhuboni
butt
hati
snot
hing
compar
est
ohowhei
snow.He’
s
br
eat
hingf
ir
eandv
einsar
epoopi
ngout
onhi
sfor
eheadandhands.Hi
sey
esar
e
bl
oodshotr
ed,
ragi
ngwi
thanger
.
“
I’
m sor
rymyl
ove,
Idi
dn’
twantt
olose
y
ou…”
“
Losememyf
oot
!Youkeptmeaway
f
rom mydaught
er!WhyDrMkhwanaz
i
r
iskedherj
obf
ory
ou?
”
“
Iwashel
pinghert
odest
royMom
BongaandKhuz
ani
’
srel
ati
onshi
p,she
wasKhuz
ani
’
sfuckbuddy
”
“
Youl
i
ttl
eev
ilbi
tc….y
ouar
esoev
il
!
Af
terev
ery
thi
ngIhav
edonef
ory
ou,
thi
s
i
showy
out
hankmebykeepi
ngmy
daught
erawayf
rom meandmaki
ngme
bel
i
eveshe’
snotmi
ne!
!Youwat
chedme
hur
tfornot
hing!Uy
iskhohl
akal
i
sent
ombaz
anesi
esmaan!
”
“
Idi
dn’
tmeant
ohur
tyoumyl
ove,
Iwas
scar
edofl
osi
ngy
ou.Thi
ngschanged
bet
weenusaf
tery
ouf
oundoutt
haty
ou
hav
eadaught
erwi
thMi
ra.Youst
opped
pay
ingat
tent
iont
ome,
itwasal
labout
Mi
rat
his,
Kamar
iat
hat
.Ngi
yax
oli
sa
Dl
ami
ni,
pleasef
orgi
veme.Iwaswr
ong,
Iadmi
t”Ibeggedbet
weenmysobs
“
Bul
l
shi
t!Ichosey
ouGugu!Imar
ri
ed
y
ou!
..
.”
“
Buty
oul
oveMi
ra!
”
“
YesIl
oveher
,Isof
ucki
ngl
oveherbut
shedoesn’
tlov
emet
hatway
,whywoul
d
Ihav
elef
tsomeonewhol
ovesmeor
shoul
dIsaywhoIt
houghtl
ovedmef
or
someonewhodoesn’
tlov
eme!Ichose
y
oust
il
lbuty
ouf
ool
edme!Youmade
meaf
ool
andgi
veawaywi
thmy
daught
er!Ihat
eyouf
ort
hisandIwi
l
l
nev
erf
orgi
vey
ounx
!”
“
Baby
”It
ryt
ohol
dhi
m buthechokes
me,
Isl
appedhi
shandt
ryi
ngt
ogethi
m
awayasIgaspf
orai
rbuthet
ight
enhi
s
gr
ib.Iseemyl
i
feendi
ngr
ightt
her
eand
t
hen.
“
Whatt
hehel
lar
eyoudoi
ngMpendul
o!”
Qhaweshout
sashepul
l
shi
m away
f
rom me.Icoughhar
dhol
dingmy
pai
nful
thr
oat
.
“
Arey
ouokaysi
s”Zanesay
shol
dingme.
Inodmyheadast
ear
sst
ream downmy
f
ace
“
Uyahl
any
ayi
niekhanda!
”(Ar
eyoucr
azy
i
nyourhead!
)
“
Howcany
oust
rangl
eawoman!She’
s
pr
egnantwi
thy
ourki
dsMpendul
o!!
”
“
Thewaysheopensherpussyf
orev
ery
di
ckt
hatpassesby
,Idoubtt
hosear
e
myki
ds!
!!
”Hest
ormsout
.If
oll
owhi
m
“
Mpendul
odon’
tgomyl
ove,
pleasel
et’
s
t
alkaboutt
his.
”Igr
abhi
shand
“
Leav
emet
hef
uckal
onebi
tch!
”He
y
ankshi
msel
fandwal
ksdownt
hest
air
s
headi
ngt
othedoorwi
thmer
ightbehi
nd
hi
m.
“
Dlamani
…”Ikneel
inf
rontofhi
m and
pl
eadwi
thhi
m buthe’
slooki
ngatme
wi
thpur
edi
sgust
.Thi
sisnotmyDl
ami
ni.
He’
sbey
ondangr
y.
“
I’
m sosor
ryf
rom t
hedeepestofmy
hear
t”Het
ri
est
owal
kawaybutIhol
d
hi
sleg.
“
Pleasedon’
tleav
eme!
”
“
Letgoofmeeee!
”Her
oar
spul
l
ingaway
hi
sleganddashesoutl
eav
ingmecr
ying
i
nagony
.Zane’
sheav
enl
yscentf
il
lsmy
nost
ri
lsasshehel
psmegetupf
rom t
he
f
loor
.
“
Shhhdon’
tcr
ysi
si”Shehol
dsmeaswe
wal
kupst
air
stot
hebedr
oom SoxandI
ar
eusi
ng.Wecl
i
mbont
hebedandshe
cr
adl
esmel
i
keababyi
nherar
ms.
“
Ibety
out
oldhi
m”Inodwi
thmyheadI
don’
thav
eener
gyt
oex
plai
nwhatr
eal
l
y
happened,
myhear
tisbr
okenbey
ond.
Howam Igoi
ngt
ofaceev
ery
oneaf
ter
t
his?Mi
rawi
l
lhat
emef
ort
his,
inf
act
ev
ery
onewi
l
lhat
eme.NowIhav
eno
onebutmy
sel
fandmybabi
esagai
nst
t
hiscr
uel
wor
ld.
“
I’
m sor
ryGugu”
“
Myl
i
fei
sov
er”
“
Youar
est
il
lcar
ryi
nghi
ski
ds,
hewon’
t
t
hrowy
ououtont
hest
reet
”
“
Youhear
dhi
m hedoesn’
tbel
i
evet
hese
ki
dsar
ehi
s”
“
He’
sjustangr
y,hewi
l
lcal
m down”I
wi
shIcansayIbel
i
evet
hathewi
l
lev
er
f
orgi
veme,
hesai
dhi
msel
fandIsawi
t
t
hroughhi
sey
es,
hehat
esme.Imust
hav
efal
l
enasl
eepi
nherar
msbecause
whenIwakeupI
’
m cov
eredwi
th
bl
anket
sandI
’
m st
il
lful
l
ydr
essed.I
hav
eagr
uesomeheadachef
rom al
lthe
cr
yingandmyey
esf
eel
sheav
y.Ist
ret
ch
ov
ert
otakemyphoneont
hebedsi
de
t
abl
e,t
imer
eads8am,
it’
sact
ual
l
ythe
nex
tmor
ningandmyhusbandi
s
obv
iousl
ynotnex
ttome.Ihopehe
camebackl
astni
ghtandhe’
ssl
eepi
ng
i
noneoft
heguestr
ooms.Ir
oll
outof
bed,
makei
tthenwal
ktot
hebedr
oom
t
ohav
eabat
h.I
'
m donewi
thev
ery
thi
ng
hal
fanhourl
ater
.It
ryt
ocal
lKhosi
but
herphonesendsmest
rai
ghtt
o
v
oicemai
l
.I’
m soashamedt
omakemy
waydownst
air
sngal
oyomz
uzuI
’
m
st
arv
ingandmyst
omachi
sgr
umbl
i
ng.I
hearaknockont
hedoorandshout
s
“
Comei
n”Zanewal
ksi
nwi
that
rayof
br
eakf
ast
“
Mor
ningsi
si”
“
Mor
ningMr
sXul
u”
“
Imadey
oubr
eakf
ast
”Ismi
l
ethi
s
womani
sni
ceandi
t’
sver
yrar
etof
ind
peopl
ewhoar
eni
ceandwel
comi
ngl
i
ke
shei
s
“
Thanky
ousomuchbuty
oudi
dn’
thav
e
t
o,I
’
m nothungr
y”myst
omach
gr
umbl
es,
thesebabi
esar
e
embar
rassi
ngme.
“
Wel
lyouar
enothungr
ybutt
heki
ds
ar
e..
.her
e”It
aket
het
rayandshesi
ts
nex
ttomeont
hebed
“
Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng”Ishr
ugmy
shoul
der
sandst
arteat
ing
“
Youwi
l
lbef
ine.I
’
m her
efory
ouokay
”
“
Whyar
eyousoni
cet
ome?
”
“
WhyIshoul
dn’
tIbeni
cet
oyou?
”
“
I’
m ahor
ri
bleper
sonZane,
howcanI
hur
tmyhusbandl
i
ket
haty
etIcl
aimt
o
l
ovehi
m”
“
Youar
enothor
ri
ble,
youwer
ejust
desper
atet
osav
eyourmar
ri
age,
howev
erwhaty
oudi
dwasnotr
ightbut
t
hatdoesn’
tmeanIhav
etomi
str
eat
y
ou.
”
“
wher
eishe?
”
“
Hedi
dn’
tcomebackl
astni
ght
,hi
s
phonei
sof
fandmybr
othercan’
ttr
ace
hi
m.Don’
tyouknowhi
sbankaccount
number
sorhi
sIDnumber
.Mybr
other
canuset
hatt
otr
yandl
ocat
ehi
m”
“
Unf
ort
unat
ely
,Idon’
t”
“
Let
’shopehe'
ssaf
e,wher
everhei
s.He
wasr
eal
l
yangr
yandbei
ngbehi
ndt
he
st
eer
ingwheel
wheny
ouar
eangr
y
somet
imesi
snotagoodi
dea”
“
OhGod,
Ihopehe’
sfi
newher
everhei
s”
“
Let
’shopeso.Ihav
etogot
owor
k,y
ou
wi
l
lbef
iner
ight
?”
“
Wor
k?”
“
YesI
’
m adoct
or”
“
Ohwow….
yesIwi
l
lbef
ine”
“
Whyy
ouseem sur
pri
sed?
”
“
Ithoughty
ouar
eahousewi
fe,
Idi
dn'
t
meani
tint
hebadwayt
hough.Pl
ease
don'
tfeel
off
ended”shechuckl
es
“
Nonet
aken.
.i
fyouneedany
thi
ngcal
l
meokay
”Shegi
vesmehernumber
s
t
henwal
ksout
.It
akeahugesi
ghand
t
ryt
ocal
lmyhusbandbuthi
sphonei
s
sendi
ngmet
ovoi
cemai
l
.Icont
inue
eat
ingmybr
eakf
astandwhenI
’
m done,
It
aket
hedi
shesdownst
air
s.If
eel
a
pr
esencebehi
ndmeasIwashdi
shes.I
t
houghtI
’
m al
oneandev
ery
onei
sat
wor
k,Nkany
ezi
andMi
nni
ear
eatschool
.
Iswi
vel
aroundandr
unst
ohi
m
“
Baby
!ThankGody
ouar
eokay
!”He
pushesmeaway
,her
eeksofal
cohol
andIcanseet
hathe’
sst
il
ldr
unk.
“
Usasel
a!”(
Youar
est
il
lher
e!)
“
Baby
….”
“
Don’
tyoudar
ecal
lmebaby
!Leav
emy
cousi
n’
shouseGugu,
Idon’
twantt
o
ev
erseey
ouagai
n!”Hi
swor
dssl
urs
“
Mpendul
opl
easeI
’
m beggi
ng…”
“
Getout
!!
!”Her
oar
swi
thangerashe
pushesmeoutoft
hehouseandIf
all
downont
hepav
ement
.
“
Hamba!
!”(
Go!
!)Igetmy
sel
fupcr
yingi
n
agonyasImakemywayoutoft
hegat
e.

-
Hepl
ant
ski
ssesal
lov
ermyf
ace,
I
gr
oanandt
urnt
otheot
hersi
deoft
he
bed,
doeshest
opno!Lwenkosi
canbe
l
i
kehi
sdaught
eratt
imes.Lor
dknows
howmuchIhat
etobedi
stur
bedi
nmy
sl
eepespeci
all
ywhenIj
ustsl
eptand
ex
haust
ed.Hehar
dlygav
emet
imef
or
mybeaut
ysl
eep,
wewer
eati
tal
most
t
hewhol
eni
ght
.Idon’
tknowsuch
sex
ual
appet
it
eisev
enheal
thyayngeke
Lwenkosi
ufunaukuy
iqedai
momoz
i
y
ami
.If
eel
hishandscar
essi
ngmy
t
highsasheki
ssest
hesi
deofmyf
ace.
“
Nononomyni
ggay
ouar
enotget
ti
ng
anynow”
“
Ngi
yakucel
ast
handwasami
”
“
Butbabywewer
eati
tthewhol
eni
ght
andI
’
mti
red”
“
Ngi
zot
himf
a-mf
akancanenj
e
st
handwasami
”Hef
li
psmeov
er
maki
ngmesl
eeponmyt
ummyand
st
art
srai
ningki
ssesf
rom t
henapofmy
neckt
omybackgoi
ngdownt
omybut
t.
Hepl
ant
ssev
eral
wetki
ssesonmybut
t,
squeez
ingandgr
abbi
ngi
tthenIf
eel
his
war
m bodyonmybackandhi
sdi
ckon
mybut
t.Hespr
eadsmybut
tcheeksand
sl
i
dehi
msel
fint
omyal
readywetpussy
,
ar
gthi
sthi
ngi
ssuchat
rai
tormaan!
“
Ahhhh”Hegr
oansonmyearandst
art
s
bucki
nghi
shi
ps.Iar
chmybackabi
tto
gi
vehi
m al
lofme.
“
Ohhshi
tmyl
ove!Ican’
tgetenoughof
y
ourgoodpusssybaby
!”Hehumpsi
nto
mehar
derandf
ast
er.
“
OhhhmyGodLwe.
..
nkossi
i
”He’
shi
tt
ing
al
lther
ightspot
snot
hingel
semakes
senseatt
hismomentIswearI
’
m under
hi
sspel
lori
sitcockspel
l
?Wear
eati
t
f
orawhi
l
eourmoansofpl
easur
efi
l
li
ng
t
her
oom.Icanf
eel
hisbodyst
if
feni
ng
hebi
tesmyshoul
derasher
eleasehi
s
sper
mst
ri
gger
ingami
ndbl
owi
ng
or
gasm i
nme.
“
Wehav
etogomyl
ove,
I’
m sur
emy
par
ent
swantt
ogot
owor
ksoKamar
ia
needsus”
“
Ohy
es,
I’
m sur
eyourmom mustt
hink
I
’
m ahor
ri
blemot
her
”
“
Ohcomeonbabesmom wi
l
lnev
er
t
hinkt
hat
.”
“
Let
’st
akeashowerkesi
zohamba”I
say
“
Canwej
ustcuddl
eforami
nut
e”
“
Yousuchabi
gbaby
”Heki
ssesmy
f
oreheadandwest
ayi
neachot
her
’s
ar
msi
nsi
l
encef
oramoment
,my
r
ingi
ngphonedi
stur
bsourmoment
,
mustbemymom shi
t!If
reemy
sel
f
f
rom mycuddl
esar
msandt
akemy
phone.
“
Hel
l
o”
“
Damnwomany
oumadet
heheadl
i
nes!
Whydi
dn’
tyout
ell
mey
ouhav
egai
ned
y
oursi
ght
”it
’sLee
“
Iwant
edt
osur
pri
sey
ou”
“
Peopl
ear
egoi
ngcr
azyabouty
ou
babes,
theywantt
oknowhowdi
dyou
gai
nyoursi
ght
”
“
Peopl
ear
enoi
syy
az,
howdi
dtheyev
en
f
indout
”
“
Yourboy
fri
enddi
dn’
ttel
lyout
hathe
post
edev
ery
thi
ngy
ouguy
swer
edoi
ng
y
est
erday
.It
hinkweshoul
dgi
vet
hem
whatt
heywantbabes,
publ
i
cst
atement
wi
l
ldo.
”
“
Hay
iLeenowIshoul
dgoi
npubl
i
c
di
shi
ngoutmyper
sonal
li
fe.HowI
gai
nedmysi
ghti
snoneofev
ery
one’
s
busi
nesst
heyshoul
dbehappyIcansee
now”
“
Don’
tyougeti
tthatpeopl
elov
eyou
andal
ltheywanti
sfory
out
oshar
ewi
th
t
hem y
ourf
ir
stex
per
iencewi
thsi
ght
.
Youhav
egi
venev
erybl
i
ndper
sonhope
t
hatonedayt
heywi
l
lal
sosee.Thi
sis
goodf
orussweet
s.I
nter
viewsr
equest
s
ar
epi
l
ingupandt
her
e’st
hisgi
rlwho
wantt
owr
it
eabookabouty
oubaby
.
Youar
eani
nspi
rat
iont
oev
ery
one”
“
OkayIheary
ou”
“
Sowhenar
eyoucomi
ngback”
“
Thedayaf
tert
omor
row.Hav
eyou
f
oundt
heapar
tmentf
orme”
“
Evenbet
termyl
oveIf
oundy
ouahouse
t
orentkosandt
oni
t’
sbeaut
if
uland
chi
l
dfr
iendl
yyougoi
ngt
olov
eit
!”
“
Howmuchi
sther
ent
”
“
R10000Permont
h”Igasp
“
YhoooLeet
hat
’sex
pensi
ve!
”
“
Hai
bokant
ihowmuchdi
dyouex
pect
i
t’
sinsandt
onbabesandi
t’
sahouse
notanapar
tment
.It
’shas4bedr
oom,
a
pool
,aj
acuz
zi,
doubl
egar
age,
youname
i
tal
l
!”
“
OhnoLeewher
eam Isupposedt
oget
t
hatmoney
.Youdor
ememberIhav
ea
daught
erandamot
hert
hatIneedt
o
t
akecar
eofandIoncet
oldy
out
hatI
wantt
ofur
thermyst
udi
es,
howam I
goi
ngt
odot
hati
fIkeepgi
vi
ngr
ich
peopl
eR10000amont
h.Ican’
tspend
R120000ay
earonr
entt
hat
’sr
idi
cul
ous
t
ome!
”
“
Okayf
ineIwi
l
lgety
ouanapar
tment
butIdoubtIwi
l
lfi
ndonet
hati
schi
l
d
f
ri
endl
yandcostl
ess”
“
Pleaset
ryhar
der
,I’
m beggi
ngy
ou”
“
Youneedt
ocomebackbabeswehav
e
3gi
gst
opr
epar
eforandsi
ncey
our
songhasr
eachedgol
dIt
hinki
t’
sti
me
wedoamusi
cvi
deo”
“
Ngi
zobuy
aLee”(
Iwi
l
lbebackLee)
“
Buy
ant
ombi
uyangi
l
ambi
sa
mawul
apho”(
comebackgi
rly
ouar
e
st
arv
ingmewheny
ouar
ether
e)Igi
ggl
e
“
Don’
twor
ryj
ustonedayt
henI
’
mther
e”
“
OkayIhav
etogo,
Ilov
eyou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”IhangupandLwenkosi
i
sgi
vi
ngmeal
ook
“
What
?”
“
Youl
ovey
ourmanagernow?
”Igi
ggl
e
t
hel
ookonhi
sfacei
scomi
cal
“
Don’
tlaugh,
I’
mtal
ki
ngt
oyou”
“
Hai
bobabydon’
ttel
lmey
ouar
e
j
eal
ousofLee,
she’
smymanagerand
she’
sasheIdon’
tdogi
rl
s”Her
aiseshi
s
ey
ebr
ow
“
Stari
saboy
?”
“
Ohwowr
eal
l
ynow!
”Ir
oll
outofbed
andwal
ktot
hebat
hroom.Ineeda
showert
ocal
m medownbef
oreI
ex
plode.Mi
nut
esl
aterhej
oinsmebutI
don’
tpayat
tent
iont
ohi
m.
“
Baby
”Idon’
trepl
ybutcont
inue
scr
ubbi
ngmybody
.
“
Dol
l
face”
“
Yini
!”Het
urnsmear
oundandmakes
mef
acehi
m
“
Don’
trai
sey
ourv
oiceatme”
“
Sincewhennowhav
eyoubecome
j
eal
ousofSt
ar?
”
“
Sincey
oust
art
edent
ert
aini
ngt
hisLee
ofy
our
s”Ichuckl
e
“
Ent
ert
aini
ng?Whatar
eyout
alki
ng
aboutLwenkosi
,she’
smymanagerev
en
i
fI’
mint
ogi
rl
sIwi
l
lnev
erdomy
col
l
eaguesl
etal
onemyboss”
“
Younev
ert
oldmey
ouwantt
ofut
her
y
ourst
udi
esbutsheknows”Il
ookat
hi
m hel
ookscut
eshamewi
thal
ookof
j
eal
ousypl
ast
eredonhi
sface
“
Ist
hatwhaty
ouar
ejeal
ousabout
?
Comeonbabywewer
ejustt
alki
ngnj
e.
YesIwantt
ost
udysomet
hingbutI
hav
en’
tdeci
dedwhat
.Youknowt
her
e’s
noguar
ant
eei
nmusi
csoIwantbyt
he
t
imeIex
pir
etohav
esomet
hingf
or
my
sel
f.I
fnotadegr
eeabusi
ness
may
be.I
’
m st
il
ldeci
ding,
Ihav
en’
tmade
upmymi
nd.Youhav
enot
hingt
obe
j
eal
ousabout
.Il
ovey
ouandy
ouar
ethe
onl
yonewhodoesi
tforme.It
oldy
ou
andI
’
m goi
ngt
otel
lyouagai
nSt
arwas
j
ustaphaset
ogett
hrought
heday
.”He
r
eleaseasi
ghofr
eli
ef
“
Iskhwel
ebut
iayngeke”
“
Awungi
yeke”(
Leav
emeal
one)Il
augh
“
ButIl
ovei
tthough”Ir
unt
hespongeon
hi
sri
ppedmuscl
es.
“
I'
m notamur
der
erbutf
ory
oubaby
kungany
iwa”Igi
ggl
eandki
sshi
m.Af
ter
ournaught
yshowerwegetdr
essedand
checkoutt
hendr
ivet
ohi
shouse.

He’
sgr
oani
ngi
npai
nandsweat
ing.I
’
m
get
ti
ngwor
ri
ednow30mi
nut
eshas
passedbuthe’
snott
hrowi
ngup.I
managet
ogi
vehi
m umut
imakhosi
gav
e
me.
“
Shoul
dIt
akey
out
othehospi
tal
?”
“
Noo.
..
Iwi
l
lbeokay
..
.ahhh”
“
Tel
lmewhatt
odobaby
”
“
Not
hingZoI
’
m….
ahhhh”he’
sinser
ious
pai
nnow.Coul
ditbepossi
blet
hatI
gav
ehi
mthewr
ongdose.Igetupf
rom
t
hebedandwal
ktot
heguestr
oom t
o
cal
lmakhosi
“
Hel
l
o”
“
Makhosi
it’
sZol
ekaIgav
emyhusband
umut
i.30mi
nuet
shaspassedbuthe’
s
nott
hrowi
ngupandhe’
sgr
oani
ngi
n
pai
n”Isaypani
cki
ng
“
Themut
imustbef
ight
ingt
hespel
l
don’
tpani
chewi
l
lthr
owupsoon”
“
Real
l
y?”
“
Yesmychi
l
djustkeepgi
vi
nghi
m
l
ukewar
m wat
er”
“
Okayt
hanky
ou”
“
Kul
ungi
l
esi
s”(
it
sokaysi
s)Ihangup
andr
usht
otheki
tchent
oboi
lwat
er
t
henpouri
tinaj
ug.Ir
unbackt
oour
bedr
oom andhel
phi
m dr
inkwat
er
“
Dri
nkmyl
ove”
“
Whati
sthi
s?”
“
It
’sl
ukewar
m wat
er”
“
Can’
tyougi
vemesomepai
n
medi
cat
ion”
“
Dri
nkwat
er…”
“
Hay
imaanZol
ekahowcanwat
erhel
p
me!Whatki
ndofadoct
orar
eyoukant
i!
Youkeepsav
ingpeopl
e’
sli
vesbuty
ou
can’
tsav
eyourhusband’
s!I
’
m dy
ing
her
e,If
eel
li
kemyi
ntest
inesar
ebur
ning
andshr
inki
ngahhhhhhh!
”
“
Justhav
ethi
swat
er,
pleaseI
’
ma
doct
orangi
thi
soy
ouhav
etot
rustme”
Hel
ooksatmet
henal
l
owmet
ohel
p
hi
m dr
inkwat
er.Iputt
hej
ugont
he
bedsi
det
abl
eandl
ookathi
m buti
t’
s
seemsl
i
kehe’
sget
ti
ngwor
se.
“
ZoI
..
.ahhhhshi
t!
!”
“
What
’shappeni
ngnow?
”Hi
sbody
st
art
sconv
ulsi
ngv
iol
ent
lyandhi
sey
es
r
oll
i
ngi
n.
“
Baby
!”Nosomet
hingi
swr
ong
“
Nkosi
!Bhekumuz
idon’
tdot
hist
ome
pl
ease!
”I’
m cr
yinghy
ster
ical
l
ynow
t
ryi
ngt
osav
ehi
m buti
t’
sinv
ain.
“
Bheki
!!
!”Ngambul
alaumny
eni
wami
!I
r
eachf
ormyphoneandcal
lBongabut
herphonesendsmest
rai
ghtt
o
v
oicemai
l
.Whydi
dIgoaheadwi
tht
his
I
’
m adoct
orf
orcr
yingoutl
oud,
I’
m not
supposedt
obel
i
evei
nwi
tchcr
aft
!
“
Gogoz
icanIcomei
n”Kamar
iasay
s
al
readyi
nsi
det
hebedr
oom.
“
What
’swr
ong,
whyar
eyoucr
ying
gogoz
i”j
ustasI
’
m aboutt
omakeacal
l
,
Lwandl
eandMi
raget
sin
“
Mommygogoz
iiscr
ying”Kamar
iasay
s
t
hemomentsheseesherpar
ent
s.
“
Mom what
’swr
ong”
“
Yourf
ather
..
.i
t’
smyf
aul
t.
.”Ibur
sti
ntoa
sob.Lwandl
erushest
ohi
sfat
herand
t
ri
est
owakehi
m up.
“
Whathappenedmom?He’
snot
br
eat
hingatal
lwehav
etot
akehi
mto
t
hehospi
tal
!!
”wet
ryt
ogethi
m upf
rom
t
hebedhebur
psl
oudl
yandt
hrowupon
t
hebed.
“
SiesKhul
u!”Kamar
iasay
sfr
owni
ng
“
Goandgetabasi
nint
hebat
hroom
Lwandl
e”HedoesasIsayandcome
back.Ipl
acei
tonBheki
’
sthi
ghsandhe
t
hrowsup.Ikeepbr
ushi
nghi
sbackunt
il
hef
ini
sht
hrowi
ngup.Lwandl
ehel
ps
hi
m dr
inkwat
er.
“
Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
”
“
Bet
ter
”Iwi
pehi
smout
hwi
thmypal
m
andki
sshi
m.
“
Wear
est
il
lher
emom soi
sKamar
ia”
Ex
cuseme,
IthoughtIhav
elosthi
m.
Bheki
chuckl
esandl
ooksatme
“
I’
m hungr
y”
“
Iwi
l
lgof
ixsomet
hingf
ory
ou”Ir
ush
outt
ogetr
idofhi
spuket
henr
inset
he
basi
n.Iwal
kbackt
othebedr
oom.
“
Thanky
ouki
ds,
yourf
atheri
sokaynow
cany
oupl
easeex
cuseus”Theynodand
wal
kout
“
Youscar
edmeBheki
”
“
I’
m sor
ry,
Idon’
tev
enknowwhatwas
wr
ongwi
thmebutIf
eel
goodnow”He
wi
pesmyt
ear
sandki
ssesme
“
Got
akeashowerwhi
l
eIchanget
he
bed”Henodsandr
oll
outofbed.Il
ook
athi
m ashewal
kst
othebedandsi
gh
wi
thr
eli
ef.It
houghtIhav
elosthi
m.I
changet
hebedqui
ckl
yandputt
hedi
rt
y
bl
anket
sandsheeti
nthel
aundr
yroom
t
henmakemywaydownst
air
stof
ixmy
husbandsomet
hingt
oeatbutIf
ind
Mi
raandLwenkosi
alr
eadymaki
ng
br
eakf
ast
.
“
Howi
sdadmom”
“
He’
sfi
neboy
”
“
Whatwaswr
ongwi
thhi
m?”
“
He’
sfi
nenow,
wehav
enot
hingt
owor
ry
about
”
“
Mom Icanseey
ouar
ehi
ding
somet
hing”
“
WuuuayLwandl
elwenkosi
,ar
eyoua
det
ect
ivenow!
”
“
Geeedon’
tscr
eam,
Iwasj
ustsay
ing.
”
“
Her
eisBabBheki
’
sbr
eakf
astmom Zo”
“
Thanky
ousweet
hear
t”It
aket
het
ray
andwal
kupst
air
s.If
indhi
m ont
he
phonesi
tt
ingont
hebed.
“
Okay
..
.by
e”Hehangsup.Igi
vehi
m hi
s
br
eakf
ast
“
Thanky
oumunt
uza.Ij
ustwantt
oeat
andsl
eepIf
eel
li
keIwascl
i
mbi
ng
mount
ains”
“
Iwi
lgi
vey
ouamassage”
“
Iwi
l
lreal
l
yappr
eci
atet
hatst
handwa
sami
”myphoner
ingsandIt
akei
t
“
Cel
e”Myhusbandgi
vesmeal
ookhe
knowst
hatCel
euset
oaskmeoutsohe
doesn’
tli
kehi
m.
“
HeyZoks,
howar
eyou”
“
I’
mfi
neandy
our
sel
f?”
“
I’
mfi
neaswel
lyourbr
otheri
sawake
hewant
shi
swi
fe.Ihav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
o
r
eachy
ourf
ri
endbutshe’
s
unr
eachabl
e.”
“
Oht
hanky
ousomuchCel
e,I
’
m onmy
way
”
“
Youar
ewel
come”
“
Bye”
“
ByeZoks”Ihangupandl
ookatmy
husbandwho’
sfr
owni
ng
“
Khuz
ani
isawakebaby
,Ihav
etogobut
wi
l
lyoubeokay
?”
“
Ofcour
segomunt
uza,
I'
m gl
adKhuz
ani
i
sawake”
“
Met
oo”
“
Bongawi
l
lbesohappy
”
“
Yesshe’
sunr
eachabl
ethough.Iwi
l
l
passbyherhouse”Igetupandt
akemy
carkey
s
“
Cal
lmewheny
ouneedme”
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Iki
sshi
sli
psandwal
k
out
.Ikeept
ryi
ngf
orBongaasIdr
ivet
o
t
hehospi
tal
butst
il
lIcan’
treachher
.
Theyhav
emov
edmybr
othert
oanot
her
r
oom.
“
Zani
!”Isqueez
ehi
minmyar
ms
“
Ican’
tbr
eat
hewoman!
”Igi
ggl
eand
pul
lback
“
Imi
ssedy
ousomuchbut
iyouscar
ed
us”
“
I’
m adi
ehar
dmydear
estsi
ster
.Howi
s
mywi
feandki
ds?
”
“
Theyar
efi
nebutt
heyhav
ebeen
wor
ri
edabouty
ou”
“
Iwantmywi
fe,
Ihav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
o
r
eachherwi
thoutsuccess”
“
Met
ooI
’
m sur
eshehasf
latbat
ter
ybut
she’
sdef
ini
tel
yonherwayher
e.She’
s
f
orev
erher
e”
“
Ican’
twai
ttoseeher
”Ismi
l
e
“
It
’sgoodt
ohav
eyoubackbr
other
”I
ki
sshi
scheek.Wet
alkaboutany
thi
ng
andev
ery
thi
nghopi
ngBongawi
l
lwal
kin
butnoshedoesn’
t.I
t’
s1pm nowsoI
deci
det
ogocheckonher
.

“
Bonga!Bongawakeup!
”Icanhear
someonecal
l
ingmeandshaki
ngme
r
oughl
y.Ibl
i
nkmyey
esopenandl
ookat
her
“
Wakeup”Il
ookar
oundI
’
mly
ingonmy
couchi
nthel
i
vingr
oom.
“
What
’swr
ong?
”Shel
ookssowor
ri
ed
“
Don’
ttel
lmey
ouhav
ebeendr
inki
ng
Bonga!
”
“
Dri
nki
ngwhatZo?
”
“
Alcohol
Ihav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
owakey
ou
upf
orwhi
l
enowy
oumusthav
epassed
out
!”
“
Hay
imusaukungi
thet
hisaphel
aI’
m not
y
ourchi
l
dfut
hiIdi
dn’
tdr
ink”shesni
ff
s
meandsi
ghswi
thr
eli
ef
“
Youdon’
tsmel
lal
cohol
,howl
onghav
e
y
oupassedouther
e”
“
Idon’
tknow,
wher
ear
emychi
l
dren”
“
Theyar
eatmyhouse.Wehav
ebeen
t
ryi
ngt
oreachy
oubuty
ouar
enot
r
eachabl
e.Khuz
ani
isawakehewant
s
y
ou”myhear
tleapwi
thj
oy
“
Real
l
y?”
“
Yessi
s,getupandgot
oyourman!
”We
bot
hgetupIgr
abmycarkey
sont
he
gl
asst
abl
e.Idon’
trememberhowI
passedoutont
hesof
aany
wayZoandI
dr
iveoursepar
ateway
s.I
’
m sohappy
mydaddyKi
sawakeIcan’
twai
ttosee
hi
m.Ir
ecei
veacal
lfr
om Noma.I
t’
s
beenawhi
l
eIwonderwhatdoesshe
want
“
Noma”
“
HeyBongahowar
eyou?
”
“
I’
mfi
neunj
ani
wena?
”
“
I’
m good.
..
hai
boIhear
dyousi
gned
ev
ery
thi
ngt
oKhumal
o’sbr
otherhow
comeIdi
dn’
tknowKhumal
ohasa
br
other
”
“
Signedev
ery
thi
ng.
..
what
?”
“
Whoi
sthi
sbr
other
?”
“
Zikhal
iIdi
dn’
tknowabouthi
mtoount
il
f
ewday
sbackbutwai
twhatdoy
ou
meanIsi
gnedev
ery
thi
ngt
ohi
m”
“
Yourl
awy
erj
ustcal
l
edmeaf
tert
he
meet
ingofwhi
chr
equest
edur
gent
ly”
“
Meet
ing?Whatmeet
ing?
”
“
LookI
’
m onmywayf
rom
Johannesbur
gwewi
l
ltal
kwhenIget
t
her
e”shehangsup.Whati
sshet
aki
ng
about
?Iar
ri
veatt
hehospi
tal
andt
hey
showmet
her
oom t
heyhav
emov
edhi
m
t
o.
“
DaddyK!
”Ihal
frunt
ohi
m andsqueez
e
hi
minmyar
msbuthepushesme.Il
ook
athi
m,hi
sey
esar
ebl
oodshotr
edandI
canseeav
einpoppi
ngonhi
sfor
ehead
“
Babywhat
..
.what
’swr
ongkhonal
a
kubuhl
ungukhona,
shoul
dIcal
la
doct
or?
”Het
akespi
ctur
esonhi
s
bedsi
det
abl
eandt
hrowt
hem r
ighton
myf
ace.I
’
m bewi
l
der
edbyhi
sreact
ions.
Ipi
ckupapi
ctur
eont
hef
loorandgasp
wi
thshockasIl
ookatmy
sel
fand
Zi
khal
ii
nti
mat
e.
“
Bekumnandi
huh?
”Hesay
slooki
ngat
mewi
they
esr
agi
nganger
CHAPTER70
Say
ingI
’
m shockedwoul
dbean
under
stat
ement
.Ihav
enev
erbeen
i
nti
mat
ewi
thZi
khal
iandf
oramoment
I
’
mthi
nki
ngi
t’
sVusi
ont
hesepi
ctur
es
notZi
khal
i
.
“
Ba.
..
I…”Ist
utt
ernotknowi
ngwhatt
o
saybecauseI
’
m soconf
used.
“
WhyBongahuh!Why
!!
”
“
BabyIdon’
tknowwhatt
hisi
sal
labout
,
Ihav
enev
ersl
eptwi
thZi
khal
i
.Iwi
l
l
nev
erdot
haty
oupl
easedon’
ttel
lmet
o
y
oubel
i
evet
his”
“
Ucabangaukut
hingi
yi
sli
maNokubonga
huh!
!Ist
hisnoty
ou?
”
“
It
’smebutmay
bet
hesepi
ctur
esar
e
phot
oshoppedst
handwasami
,IswearI
di
dn’
tsl
eepwi
thany
onel
etal
one
Zi
khal
i
!”
“
HeyI
’
m notst
upi
d!Iknowa
phot
oshoppedpi
ctur
eIwor
kwi
tht
hese
t
hingsev
erysi
ngl
eday
!”
“
Ohmay
bet
hisi
snotZi
khal
ibutVusi
,
someonewant
stodest
royour
r
elat
ionshi
pbaby
,pl
easebel
i
eveme”I
’
m
i
ntear
snowwhathur
tst
hemosti
sthat
hebel
i
evest
hatIcoul
ddot
hist
ohi
m.I
t
houghthet
rust
edmeenought
oseei
f
I
’
mtel
l
ingt
het
rut
hornot
.
“
Lookatt
hesepi
ctur
escar
eful
l
yandt
ell
me,
am Inott
heonewhochoset
hese
under
gar
ment
sfory
ou!
!Ont
heot
her
onewher
eyouar
est
il
ldr
essedy
ouar
e
wear
ingt
hatsamedr
essy
ouwear
ing
r
ightnow!
!It
’scl
eart
haty
ouar
ecomi
ng
f
rom hi
mri
ghtnow!
!”He’
sbr
eat
hingf
ir
e
Idon’
tthi
nkIhav
eev
erseenhi
mthi
s
angr
yandhur
t.
“
Not
hat
’snott
rue,
I’
m comi
ngf
rom
homeKhuz
ani
youcanev
enaskedZo
shef
oundmepassedoutont
hecouch”
Isob
“
WhyBonga,
howcany
oudot
hist
ome?
Whatmakesmeangr
yist
haty
ouar
e
deny
ingi
t!Ungenz
aisi
l
ima!
!Whatdoes
hehav
ethatIdon’
thuh?Am Inot
sat
isf
yingy
ou?
!”
“
Idi
dn’
t…”
“
Ukubhebhakamnandi
kunami
?
Unompi
piomkhul
ukunowami
?Ori
sit
becausehel
ooksl
i
keVusi
,her
emi
nds
y
ouofy
ourl
ateabusi
vehusband?
”(I
s
hef
ucki
ngy
ougoodt
henme?Doeshe
hasabi
gdi
ckt
henmi
ne?
)Ishakemy
headnoasIsob.
“
Thenwhati
sithuh!
!Youcoul
dn’
twai
t
f
ormet
owakeupf
rom t
hecoma!
!”
“
Iwai
tedf
ory
ouKhuz
ani
,Iswearwhy
can’
tyoubel
i
evemehuh!Whycan’
tyou
t
rustmewhenIsayIhav
enev
ersl
ept
wi
thZi
khal
i
.Il
ovey
ouandIwi
l
lnev
er
hur
tyoul
i
ket
hat
”
“
Yourl
i
esmakemesi
ck!It
rust
edy
ou
wi
thev
ery
thi
ngi
nmebuty
oucoul
dn’
t
wai
ttoopeny
ourl
egsf
oranot
herman
whi
l
eIwasf
ight
ingf
ormyl
i
fe!You
f
uckedt
hesamemanwet
hinkwas
behi
ndy
ourar
restar
eyout
haty
ou
cheap!
!!
”
“
Don’
tyoudar
ecal
lmecheap!
!”
“
Youar
echeapv
elemaan!Getoutofmy
si
ght
,youdi
sgustme!
!”
“
Khu…”
“
Out
!!
!!
!!
!!
”Imakemywayoutwi
tht
ear
s
cl
oudi
ngmyey
es.Igeti
nmycarandcr
y
myl
ungsout
.Myhear
tisi
npi
eces,
I
can’
tbel
i
evewhatj
usthappenedand
whatconf
usesmet
hemosti
swhenand
howwer
eal
loft
hesepi
ctur
est
aken
wi
thoutmyknowl
edge.Iwi
pemyt
ear
s
andgat
hermyst
rengt
hfort
hedr
ive
t
henbr
ingt
heengi
net
oli
fe.Notev
en
gospel
musi
ccaneasemybr
okenhear
t
r
ightnow.Idon’
tev
enknowwher
ethi
s
Zi
khal
il
iv
es,
Iwoul
dgoandconf
ront
hi
m.Icansmel
ladi
vi
nesmel
lfr
om
out
sideasIshuf
fl
einsi
det
hehouse.
“
Dragongr
anny
!”Kamar
iascr
eamsas
shehugsmyt
highs.
“
Hel
l
osweet
hear
t”Ibendt
oki
ssher
f
orehead
“
Thanky
ouf
orsav
ingmychi
ckensand
buy
ingt
hem f
ood”Kam Kam say
swi
tha
sweetsmi
l
e
“
It
’sokaysweet
hear
t”I
’
m notsur
ewhat
she’
stal
ki
ngabout
.Idon’
tremember
buy
ingf
oodf
orherchi
ckensordi
dI?
“
Butmom di
dyouhav
etoputt
hem i
n
mybedr
oom t
heyshi
tev
ery
wher
eev
en
onmybed”Mi
rasay
swi
thannoy
ance
“
Iputt
hem i
nyourbedr
oom?
”
“
Yes!Goshy
oushoul
dseet
hemess
t
heydi
dther
e”
“
I’
m sor
ry,
canIgol
i
eabi
tpl
ease.Iwi
l
l
wakeupl
atert
oeatwhat
every
ouar
e
maki
ng,
itsmel
l
sreal
l
yni
ce”Shel
ooks
atmeasi
fshe’
sst
udy
ingmeIwal
kto
mybedr
oom bef
oreshesay
sany
thi
ng.I
ki
ckmyshoesof
fandcl
i
mbont
hebed
t
henweepsi
l
ent
ly.Howdi
dwegether
e?
Whathappened?Iwassohappyt
hathe
i
sawakebutmyhappi
nesswasshor
t
l
i
ved.
“
Mommyar
eyouokay
?”Iwi
pemyt
ear
s
andf
akeasmi
l
e
“
Whathappenedt
oknocki
ng?
”
“
I’
m sor
ry.
..
what
’sgoi
ngonmom i
s
uncl
eKokay
”Icoul
dn’
thel
pmy
sel
fbut
bur
sti
ntoasob.Shej
oinsmeont
he
bedandenv
elopesmei
nherar
ms
“
Kwenz
ekeni
Mamai
shedead?
”(what
happened)sheaskswi
thashakyv
oice
Ishakemyheadno
“
Thenwhati
sit
,youar
escar
ingme”I
don’
thav
eener
gyt
otal
knott
hatIwant
t
otel
lheraboutt
hisandsher
eal
i
zes
t
hatal
lIwantt
oisl
eti
tal
lout
.She
hol
dsmet
ight
lyi
nherar
msandwhi
sper
i
nmyear
“
What
everi
tis,
it’
sgoi
ngt
obeokay
don’
tcr
ymommy
”Ist
hist
heendofour
r
elat
ionshi
p?
“
Whenev
erIwasdownandcr
yingi
n
Keny
aKamar
iauset
osi
ngasongf
or
meandI
’
dfeel
bet
terIhopei
tdoest
he
magi
ctoy
out
oomama”Sheki
ssesmy
f
oreheadandst
art
ssi
ngi
ng
“
Uku,
ukushonakwel
anga
Kul
eth'
izi
nhl
unguz
odwa,
kul
eth'
izi
nsi
zi
z
odwa
Uku,
ukuphumakwel
anga,
Kul
eth'
int
okoz
o,nenj
abul
o.
Thul
a,t
hul
amamaungakhal
i
,
Sul
amamai
nyembez
izakho,
Umdal
iuz
osi
boni
s'i
ndl
ela.
Thul
a,t
hul
amamaungakhal
i
,
Sul
amamai
nyembez
izakho,
Umdal
iuz
osi
boni
s'i
ndl
ela.
Thul
a
Mdal
isohl
alasi
cel
a,
Ngob'
impl
i
l'i
hlal
ainz
ima
Ngaphandl
ekwakh'
it
hembaal
i
kho
Ny
embez
izi
xubenegaz
i
Mdal
iwet
husphi
ndesacel
a,
Khi
ph'
ubuhl
unguebusweni
bami
I
gamal
akhol
i
hlal
ali
khany
a
Ut
handol
i
phi
l
isaempi
l
weni
I
'
m onmykneesandI
'
m pr
ayi
ngohLor
d!
Andmyhandsar
ehel
duphi
gh,
ohnoo
Andal
lthatIhav
eissi
n
Cl
eansemeohLor
d!
Thul
a,t
hul
amamaungakhal
i
,
Sul
amamai
nyembez
izakho,
Umdal
iuz
osi
boni
s'i
ndl
ela.
Thul
a,t
hul
amamaungakhal
i
,
Sul
amamai
nyembez
izakho,
Umdal
iuz
osi
boni
s'i
ndl
ela.
Thul
a

Ng'
yaz
ikubuhl
ungu
Kodwakuz
odl
ulamama
I
nki
ngaz
akhonenhl
unguz
akho,
Konkesi
kubekakuy
e
Ngy
azi
kul
ukhuni
Ngy
azi
kuy
asi
ndakuy
ehl
ela
Kodwaumakuy
int
andoy
akhe
Kul
ungi
l
eyebokul
ungi
l
e!
Iknowi
thur
tsIknowi
tbr
eaksy
ouapar
t
Iseet
hepai
nIseei
tri
ghti
nyourey
es
Wohl
abel
el'
ubongeamaz
ulu
Idi
d,Idi
d,Idi
d..

Thul
a,t
hul
amamaungakhal
i
,
Sul
amamai
nyembez
izakho,
Umdal
iuz
osi
boni
s'i
ndl
ela.
Thul
a,t
hul
amamaungakhal
i
,
Sul
amamai
nyembez
izakho,
Umdal
iuz
osi
boni
s'i
ndl
ela.
”
Themessagei
nhersongi
ssopower
ful
andherangel
i
cvoi
cei
ssoot
hingmy
soul
byt
het
imeshest
opssi
ngi
ngIhav
e
al
readysuccumbedi
ntosl
umber
.

“
Daddy
!”Mydaught
err
unst
omet
he
momentshewal
ksi
nwi
thher
gr
andmot
her
.Iopenmyar
mswi
def
or
herandshet
hrowsher
sel
finmyar
ms.
“
Myl
i
ttl
eangel
”Isayenv
elopi
ngheri
n
myar
ms
“
Imi
ssedy
ousomuchdaddy
”
“
I’
m her
emyangel
”
“
Iwassoscar
ed,
Ithoughty
ouwi
l
ldi
e
andl
eav
emel
i
kemommy
”myhear
t
si
nksIpul
lherbackandl
ookather
“
I’
m sor
ryt
hatIscar
edy
oubutI
’
m okay
nowdon’
twor
ry.Iwi
l
lnev
erl
eav
eyou
babygi
rlatl
eastnotnow.Daddyst
il
l
hav
etoseey
ougr
owi
ngup,
goi
ngt
o
hi
ghschool
,mat
ri
cul
ati
ng,
goi
ngt
o
uni
ver
sit
y,gr
aduat
ing,
get
ti
ngaj
oband
l
i
vehappi
l
y”
“
Whataboutget
ti
ngmar
ri
edt
oagood
manl
i
key
ouandhav
eki
ds?
”Ichokeon
mysal
i
vaIwasn’
tex
pect
ingt
hatf
rom
her
.Icanseemymot
herst
if
li
ngal
augh
“
Hai
bobabygi
rly
ouar
est
il
laki
dto
ev
ent
hinkaboutt
hat
”
“
I’
m notaki
ddadI
’
m 12y
ear
s”
“
Youar
eaki
dandy
ouhav
en’
ttur
n12
y
ear
s”
“
I’
mtur
ning12ont
heweekenddad
what
’st
hedi
ff
erence”shesay
srol
l
ing
herey
es.Ipi
nchherchubbycheeks
“
Don’
trol
lyourey
esatme”shegi
ggl
es
andr
ubshercheeks
“
Sawubonamf
anawami
”(Hel
l
omyboy
)
mom say
sasshehugsme
“
Hel
l
osal
ukaz
isami
arey
ougood?
”
“
Nowt
haty
ouar
eawake,
I’
m sohappy
myson.Iwassowor
ri
ed,
thet
houghtof
l
osi
ngy
oul
i
keNol
i
tha”
“
I’
m sor
ryIscar
edy
oubutI
’
mfi
ne”she
si
tsdownont
hechai
randl
ooksatme
“
Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng”
“
I’
mfi
nemom”
“
Youar
enotf
inekhehl
a,Icanseey
ou”I
si
ghact
ual
l
ymyhear
tisbr
okenhow
coul
dBongadot
hist
omeobv
iousl
yI
can’
tshar
ethatwi
thmymom.
“
I’
mfi
nemom”
“
Whati
sthi
sDaddy
”shesay
sbendi
ng
t
opi
ckuponeoft
hepi
ctur
es.It
houghtI
pi
ckedal
loft
hem up
“
Don’
tpi
cki
tupEmi
hle!
”Ican’
thav
emy
daught
erseei
nghermommyi
nti
mat
e
wi
thanot
herman.
“
Yini
ley
o?”(
What
’st
hat
?)Mom say
s
get
ti
ngupandwal
ktomyot
hersi
de.
“
Mom l
eav
eit
,Iwi
l
lpi
cki
tupmy
sel
f”
“
It
’sokaymysonI
…”
“
Nomama!
”Inkani
ekul
esal
ukaz
ijehov
a,
shepi
cksupt
hepi
ctur
eont
hef
loorand
l
ookati
t.
“
Iheeeengashongat
hil
eyant
ombaz
ane
ay
il
ungangamany
alamani
lawa!
”(It
old
y
out
hatgi
rli
snotgoodwhati
sthi
s!)I
snat
cht
hepi
ctur
efr
om herandputi
t
undermypi
l
low.
“
Didn’
tIsaydon’
tpi
cki
tup!
”
“
Youdon’
thav
etobeangr
ymyson,
goodr
iddancet
obadr
ubbi
sh!
”
“
Mom l
eav
e”
“
Khu….
”
“
Leav
enow!
!”
“
Ilov
eyoudaddy
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomyl
i
ttl
eangel
,gi
vedaddy
aki
ss”sheki
ssesmyl
i
pst
hent
heywal
k
out
.It
aket
hepi
ctur
eundermypi
l
low
andl
ookati
t.If
eel
tear
sofangerand
hur
tbur
ningi
nmyey
es.Howcanshedo
t
hist
ome?Af
terev
ery
thi
ngIhav
edone
f
orhert
oshowherhowmuchsher
eal
l
y
meanst
ome.
“
Aaaaaahhhhh!
!”Igr
oani
nfr
ust
rat
ionas
It
eart
hepi
ctur
eint
opi
eces.Iheara
l
aughandl
ookup
“
Eveni
fyoucant
eart
hem apar
titwon’
t
changeany
thi
ng”Hesay
smaki
nghi
s
wayt
owar
dsmybed,
IthoughtBonga
wasex
agger
ati
ngwhenshesai
dthi
s
bast
ardl
ooksl
i
keKhumal
o,l
ooki
ngat
hi
mri
ghtnowi
sboi
l
ingmybl
ood.Iwant
t
ojumponhi
m andst
rangl
ehi
mto
deat
h.
“
Ufunani
lasf
ebe!
!”(
Whatar
eyoudoi
ng
her
ebi
tch!
)Ir
oari
nanger
.Het
akest
he
pi
ecesoft
hepi
ctur
esandl
ooksatt
hem
t
hensmi
l
e
“
Yabonal
abesengi
gudl
anay
e..
.ohKhal
i
Khal
iwami
youar
esoooogood,
Ihav
e
nev
erhadagooddi
ckl
i
key
our
s”she
mi
micaf
emal
evoi
ceandIl
osti
tand
j
umponhi
m buthebacksawayal
most
causi
ngmet
ofal
lof
fthebed.Fuckt
his
br
okenl
eg!Hebur
sti
ntol
aught
er
“
Kumnandi
neh”
“
Fucky
ou!
!”
“
Don’
twor
rywhenI
’
m doneher
e,Iwi
l
l
gof
ucky
ourwi
fe”
“
Ngi
zokubul
alaZi
khal
iyez
wa,
Iwi
l
lki
l
l
y
ouwi
thmybar
ehands!
!”
“
Uzongi
fi
cay
ini
ngal
onkonkol
o
oseml
enz
eni
?”(
Wil
lyoucat
chmewi
tha
casti
nyourl
eg?
)Hel
aughsl
oudl
y
“
Nowy
ouf
eel
howi
tfeel
swhenanot
her
manf
ucksy
ourwoman,
kumnandi
neh?
Kuy
aki
ti
za?
”(I
tsni
cer
ight
?It
’st
ickl
i
ng)
“
Whatt
hef
uckar
eyout
alki
ngabout
?”
“
Hlengi
weHl
ongwane,
doesi
tri
nga
bel
l
?”
“
Shewasy
ourwoman?
”
“
Shebet
ray
edmel
i
key
ourwi
febet
ray
ed
y
ou.Nowwear
eev
en,
youf
uckedmy
womanandIf
uckedy
our
sandbyt
he
l
ookoft
hingsI
’
m st
il
lgoi
ngt
ofuckher
,
shecan’
tresi
staKhumal
odi
ck”He
smi
rks
“
Soy
ouki
l
ledheraf
terf
indi
ngoutt
hatI
f
uckedherandputheri
nmyboott
o
f
rameme?Youar
esocr
uel
!!
”
“
Inev
ermeantt
oki
l
lher
,itwasan
acci
dent
.Yout
hinky
oucangoar
ound
f
ucki
ngot
herpeopl
e’
swomenandget
awaywi
thi
t?Udaki
wemsunuwakho!
!”
“
Ifshewasy
ourwomanasy
oucl
aim,
it
woul
dn’
thav
ebeeneasyt
ofuckher
,it
’s
obv
iousshecoul
dn’
tresi
stmydi
ck
game”
“
Justl
i
kehowy
ourwi
fecoul
dn’
tresi
st
mi
ne,
shewascal
l
ingmeKhal
iKhal
i
wakhe.Umnandi
umf
azi
wakho
y
essess”Hel
i
ckshi
sli
ps,
fuckmy
br
okenl
eg!Ij
umponhi
m andwebot
h
f
all
ont
hef
loor
.Ipunchhi
m ov
erand
ov
eronhi
sfaceunt
ilhebl
eeds.
“
MrMsi
mangowhatar
eyoudoi
ng!
”Dr
Cel
esay
sashepul
l
smeawayf
rom t
his
asshol
e
“
LetmegoIwantt
oki
l
lthatbast
ard!
!”
“
Hayt
hisi
snotaccept
abl
eandy
ouar
e
hur
ti
ngy
our
sel
f”Icanf
eel
thepai
nin
myl
egbuti
t’
snot
hingcompar
edt
othe
onei
nmyhear
t.Thebast
ardl
aughsas
heget
supf
rom t
hef
loor
“
Youneedt
ogetoutofher
esi
r!
”DrCel
e
say
stoZi
khal
iwhol
ooksatmewi
tha
smi
rkt
henwal
ksout
.
“
Youar
est
rai
ningy
ourl
egnowy
oucan’
t
bei
nvol
vedi
nvi
olencewhi
l
eyouar
est
il
l
r
ecov
eri
ng.Youri
njur
iesar
est
il
lfr
esh”
“
Doy
out
hinkIcar
eaboutmyi
njur
ies?
”
Hehel
psmegeti
nbedt
hatmomentmy
l
egi
sinex
cruci
ati
ngpai
n.
“
Arey
ouokaynow?
”
“
Justgetoutofher
eyouar
esuf
focat
ing
me”Hesi
ghsandwal
ksout
.Iwi
shIcan
saypunchi
nghi
m hel
pedmer
eleaset
he
angerandpai
ninmebuti
tdi
dn’
t.The
sacr
if
icesImadef
orBongat
oshowher
howmuchIl
oveher
.Iev
ensol
dmysoul
t
othedev
il
,Sci
ssort
ogetheroutofj
ail
andIknowi
t’
sonl
yamat
teroft
imehe
askmef
oraf
avour
.Igav
ehermyhear
t,
mysoul
inf
actIgav
eherev
ery
thi
nga
mancangi
vehi
swomanbutshechose
t
obet
raymeanddenyi
t.I
’
m asof
twar
e
dev
eloperIownacompanyt
hatdev
elop
appsandsof
twar
es,
Icoul
dnev
ermi
ss
aphot
oshoppedpi
ctur
e!Thatwasher
busyf
ucki
ngaKhumal
olookal
i
keori
s
t
hiswhati
t’
sabout
,shei
snotov
erVusi
?
It
houghtBr
endal
eav
ingmef
orar
ich
manhur
tsbutt
hisi
sthewor
stpai
nI
hav
eev
erf
elti
nmyl
i
feandi
tmakesme
r
eal
i
zet
hatnotev
ent
hewor
dlov
eit
sel
f
candescr
ibehowIf
eel
forBonga.I
f
oundmyper
manenthomei
nherhear
t
andIt
houghtIwasgoi
ngt
oli
vet
her
e
f
orev
erbutnow…Iwi
pemyt
ear
s
v
igor
ousl
yandchuckl
eindi
sbel
i
eft
hat
I
’
m cr
yingov
erawomandamny
ou
NokubongaMt
himkhul
u!

Heki
ckedmeoutofhi
scousi
n’
shouse
aspr
egnantasIam,
it’
scl
eart
hathe
doesn’
tcar
eaboutt
hesebabi
es,
not
t
hatI
’
m sur
pri
sed.Hesai
dithi
msel
fthat
hedoesn’
tbel
i
evet
heyar
ehi
ssoI
guesst
hisi
sit
.Ihav
ebeenwal
ki
ng
ai
mlessl
yI’
m sot
ir
edr
ightnow.I
’
m
st
arv
ingandt
hir
sty
,thesuni
snot
hav
ingmer
cyonme,
youwoul
dswear
i
t’
snotwi
nter
.If
indaspotundert
he
t
reeandr
estt
her
e.Idon’
tknowwher
eI
am goi
ngt
osl
eept
ohi
ght
.Iwi
shhe
gav
ememyphone,
Iwoul
dhav
ecal
l
ed
mom.Iseeagr
eyChev
rol
etpul
l
ingov
er
t
henawi
ndowl
ower
sdown.
“
Hel
l
o”say
saf
iney
oungmani
ngr
ey
Chev
rol
et.
“
Hi”
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngt
her
eal
one?
”
“
I’
mjustr
est
ing”
“
Arey
ougoi
ngsomewher
e?”Ishakemy
headno
“
OkayIwoul
dhav
egi
veny
oual
i
ft”
“
Act
ual
l
yI’
m goi
ngsomewher
e”Isay
“
Comehopi
n”Igetupf
rom t
hegr
ass
andwal
ktot
hecar
.Heopenst
hedoor
f
ormef
rom i
nsi
deandIst
epi
nthen
cl
oset
hedoor
.
“
I’
m Bandi
l
e”
“
Gugul
ethu”
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
Auckl
andPar
k”wef
all
int
ocomf
ort
abl
e
si
l
ence,
heseem l
i
keav
eryshyguyand
I
’
m sur
pri
sedt
hathedoesn’
tev
enask
mynumber
swhenhedr
opsmeof
f.I
guesst
her
ear
egoodguy
soutt
her
e
whowantt
ohel
pwi
thoutget
ti
ng
any
thi
ngi
nret
urn.
“
Thanky
ousomuch”
“
Youar
ewel
come”Hehoot
sonceand
dr
ivesof
f.Il
ookatmypar
ent
s’house
andt
akeahugesi
gh.Ihopet
heywi
l
l
acceptme.Thegat
eisopensoImake
mywayi
n.Mom i
sshockt
oseeme
whensheopenst
hedoor
“
Gugu”It
hrowmy
sel
finherar
msand
cr
y
“
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”wowi
sthat
al
lshecansay
“
Ihav
enowher
etogomama,
heki
cked
meoutofhi
shouse”
“
Youcan’
tbeher
e,y
ourf
atherwi
l
lbe
angr
y”
“
Whoi
sthat
?”Dadsay
sIpul
lbackf
rom
mymom andl
ookathi
m.
“
Whatt
hehel
lar
eyoudoi
ngher
e!!
”He
shout
s
“
Ihav
enowher
etogodaddy
,I’
m sor
ry”
“
Itol
dyout
hati
fyouwal
koutoft
hat
door
,nev
ersaty
ourf
ooti
nmyhouse
whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
enowhuh,
you
madey
ourchoi
ceGugul
ethu!
”
“
I’
m sor
rydaddyIwi
l
ldoany
thi
ngy
ou
wantev
enBcom account
ing,
please
t
akemebackI
’
m beggi
ngy
ou”Icr
y
“
Leav
eGugul
ethu!
”
“
Buthoneyshei
sourdaugh…”
“
ShutupLondeka!wenahamba!
!”(
You
go!
)Ikneel
ont
hef
loor
“
Ngi
yax
oli
sababa”(
I’
m sor
rydad)Isay
pr
essi
ngmypal
mst
oget
her
“
Ncubepl
ease”Mom pl
eadswi
thdad
buthe’
shear
ingnone
“
Youwantt
oleav
ewi
thherLondeka”
mymom say
snot
hingandl
ooksdown
ast
ear
sfal
ldownherf
ace
“
GetoutofmyhouseGugul
ethu!
!!
!”Iget
upf
rom t
hef
loorandIwal
kout
.Iwi
shI
canbehi
tbyacaranddi
e.Ican’
tst
and
t
hispai
n,i
t’
stoomuchandsuf
focat
ing.
Howam Igoi
ngt
obr
ingmyki
dsi
nthi
s
wor
ldwhi
l
eIhav
enot
hing?Howam I
goi
ngt
otakecar
eoft
hem?
“
Gugu!
”Ihearav
oicecal
l
ingmeasI
wal
kal
ongt
her
oad.It
urnar
oundi
t’
smy
l
i
ttl
esi
sterNhl
anz
eko.
“
Nzeko”Shet
hrowsher
sel
finmyar
ms
andIhughert
ight
lyt
henwepul
lapar
t
af
terawhi
l
le.
“
Imi
ssedy
ousi
s”al
onet
earf
all
sonher
r
ightcheek
“
Imi
ssedy
out
ooNz
eko”Isaywi
ping
hert
ear
.
“
Whyi
sdaddysomeant
oyouIhat
e
hi
m”
“
Don’
tsayt
hathe’
sst
il
lourf
ather
”
Nz
ekoi
s15y
ear
sol
dnowandt
hel
ast
bor
nwho’
sal
soagi
rli
s10y
ear
sol
d.
“
Mom sai
dImustgi
vey
out
his”she
handsmer
oll
ednot
es
“
Tel
lmom Isai
dthanky
ouokay
”
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ngnow?
”
”
Tomyf
ri
end’
spl
ace”
“
Mir
a?”
“
Uhm y
es”
“
Atl
easty
ouwi
l
lbesaf
e.Il
ovey
ousi
s”
“
Ilov
eyout
ool
i
ttl
esi
s”Iki
ssher
f
orehead
“
Ihav
etogobef
oredaddyseesme”we
hugt
hensher
unsaway
.Icountt
he
moneyi
t’
sR1000atl
eastIwi
l
lbeabl
e
t
otakeat
axi
toKZN.Si
sKhosi
might
hav
elef
tmeal
onewi
tht
hismessbut
I
’
m gl
adshel
eftmeahouseatl
eastI
won’
tbest
ayi
ngi
nthest
reet
sIj
ust
needaj
ob.

Not
hingImeannot
hingatal
lcoul
dhav
e
pr
epar
edmef
orGugu’
sbet
ray
al.Ist
il
l
can’
tbel
i
eveshedi
dthi
stomeaf
ter
ev
ery
thi
ngwehav
ebeent
hrough
t
oget
her
,af
terev
ery
thi
ngIhav
edonef
or
her
.It
ookheri
nwhenherpar
ent
s
di
sownedher
,Ipai
dforherst
udi
esand
madeanhonestwomanoutofhershe
t
hankmewi
thapl
ateofshi
t!Ishoul
d
hav
etr
ust
edmygut
,Mi
raandt
he
connect
ionIf
eltwi
thKamar
ia.NowI
f
eel
hor
ri
bleaf
tert
het
hingsIsai
dtomy
daught
erandMi
ra.Howam Igoi
ngt
o
f
acet
hem af
tert
his?Howwi
l
lIev
ent
ell
t
hem aboutt
his?Thi
swi
l
lconf
usemy
daught
erev
enmor
enow,
onemi
nut
e
I
’
m herf
atherandt
henex
tmi
nut
e
Lwandl
eisherf
athert
heni
t’
smeagai
n.
Mi
rai
sfr
agi
l
eshewi
l
lbehur
tmor
e
especi
all
ythatshedi
dsayKamar
iai
s
mi
neandIdi
dn’
tbel
i
eveher
.Then
t
her
e’sLwandl
ewhot
hinksKamar
iai
s
hi
sandIr
ememberhowhappyhewas
af
terr
eadi
ngt
heDNAr
esul
ts.Idon’
tli
ke
t
hatboybutIf
eel
sor
ryf
orhi
m.How
coul
dGugupl
aywi
thourf
eel
i
ngsl
i
ke
t
his?Inev
ert
houghtshe’
scr
uel
li
ket
his
t
oget
herwi
thDrMkhwanaz
i.I
fIhad
ener
gyI
’
dsayt
heyar
egoi
ngt
opayf
or
t
hisbutnowIhav
enopower
.Ij
ustl
ost
myf
atherwhom It
houghtnegl
ect
edus
onl
ytof
indoutmom i
stheonewhot
hat
deni
edusourf
ather
.Asi
fthat
’snot
enoughIf
oundoutmywi
fet
emper
ed
wi
thmydaught
er’
sDNAr
esul
tsand
mademebel
i
eveshe’
snotmi
ne.I
sit
notenought
hatIl
ost4y
ear
sofherl
i
fe
Guguhadt
otakeawayt
hese3mont
hs.
“
Wher
e’sGugu?
”Zaneaks.
“
She’
sgone”Isi
ponmybeer
“
Gonewher
e?”
“
Iki
ckedheroutoft
hehouse”
“
Real
l
yMpendul
ohowcoul
dyoudot
hat
,
she’
spr
egnantf
orcr
yingoutl
oud!
”
“
HeyZanez
inhl
eawume!
”
“
Don’
ttal
ktomywi
fel
i
ket
hat
!”Qhawe
say
s
“
Whogav
eyouaper
missi
ont
oki
ck
someoneouti
nmyhouse?Thi
sismy
housenoonehasar
ightt
oki
ckany
one
out
!”Zaneshout
s
“
Hambakeuy
omf
unami
na
ngi
yahamba”(
Goandf
etchherbutI
’
m
l
eav
ing)
“
Bot
hofy
oucal
m downpl
ease”
“
NoIwon’
tcal
m downbaby
.I
under
stand,
Ireal
l
yunder
standt
hat
Gugubet
ray
edhi
m butt
oki
ckheroutof
t
hehouseaspr
egnantasshei
s!Soxi
s
sel
fi
sh,
he’
sthi
nki
ngabouthi
spai
nonl
y
whatabouthi
ski
dst
hatGugui
s
car
ryi
ng”
“
Don’
tyoudar
ecal
lmesel
fi
sh,
youdon’
t
knowt
hepai
nI’
mfeel
i
ngr
ightnow.
.”
shecut
smeof
f
“
Yourpai
nismor
eimpor
tantt
hany
our
chi
l
dren?
”
“
I’
m notev
ensur
ethoseki
dsar
emi
ne!
”
“
Wow!
”shest
ormsoutandQhawe
f
oll
owsher
.If
li
pthr
ought
hechannel
s
butI
’
m notf
indi
ngany
thi
ngt
hatex
cit
e
me.Igul
pdownmybeerandwal
kto
ki
tchent
ogetanot
heroneIf
indQhawe
comf
ort
inghi
scr
yingwi
fe
“
Iknowt
hatwhatshedi
diswr
ongbut
ki
cki
ngheroutont
hest
reeti
scr
uel
baby
,she’
spr
egnantf
orcr
yingoutl
oud.
If
eel
sor
ryf
orherbecauseIcansee
my
sel
finher
,shej
ustr
emi
ndsmeof
my
sel
fwhenIwasy
oung.Iwi
shshe
coul
dbegi
venasecondchancel
i
key
ou
gav
emei
sthatt
oomucht
oaskmy
l
ove?
”
“
Mpendul
oisst
il
langr
yst
handwasami
andhehasar
ightt
obeangr
y,l
et’
sgi
ve
hi
mti
meI
’
m sur
ewhenhecal
m down
hewi
l
lcomet
ohi
ssenses”
“
Whati
fbyt
hatt
imei
twi
l
lbet
ool
ate?
I
t’
swi
nterf
orcr
yingoutl
oudwher
e’s
shegoi
ngt
osl
eep?
”
“
Shhhhdon’
tcr
y,Iwi
l
ltot
alkt
ohi
m
okay
”Hewi
peshert
ear
sandki
ssesher
f
orehead.Iwal
kinandt
akesi
xpackof
beerofwhi
chIhav
eboughtt
henwal
k
backt
othel
oungewi
thoutsay
inga
wor
d.Isi
tdownanddr
inkmybeer
s
whi
l
ewat
chi
ngcr
icket
.

Day
spassedr
atherf
ast
,it
’sFr
idayt
oday
andwear
eli
vi
ngf
orEscour
tbutQhawe
andhi
swi
fel
eftonWednesday
.They
want
edmet
ogowi
tht
hem butIwasn’
t
r
eady
.Ij
ustneededsomet
imet
o
pr
ocessev
ery
thi
ngt
hati
shappeni
ng.
“
Theyar
eher
emal
umeMpendul
o,we
shoul
dgo”Nkany
ezi
say
s
“
Okayboygocal
lyourbr
other
s”Her
uns
upst
air
sandt
ocal
lhi
sbr
other
smi
nut
es
l
atert
heycomedownwi
thMi
nni
e.We
wal
kout
sideandabl
ackVi
toi
sal
ready
par
kedont
hedr
iveway
.I’
m notgoi
ngt
o
beusi
ngmycarwewi
l
ldr
iveal
ltoget
her
wi
thsomeoft
hef
ami
l
ymember
sof
whi
chI
’
myett
omeet
.Mi
nni
erunst
o
t
hischubbybeaut
if
ulwomanwhoj
ust
gotoutoft
heVi
toandhugsher
“
GogoLi
l
e!”
“
Heybabygi
rly
uuuuy
asi
nda!
”Shesay
s
pi
cki
ngherupt
henki
ssesherl
i
ps”
“
Howar
eyoumyangel
”
“
I’
mfi
neGogo,
Imi
ssedy
ou”
“
Imi
ssedy
out
oomysweet
hear
t”
“
Didy
oucomewi
tht
heQuadr
upl
ets?
”
“
No”
“
Hawuwhy
”
“
Bay
ahl
uphal
abo”
“
ButImi
ssedt
hem Gogoz
i”
“
Don’
twor
ryony
ourbi
rt
hdayIwi
l
lbr
ing
t
hem”
“
Yaay
!”ThewomanputMi
nni
edown
andgr
eet
sme.
“
Hai
bonat
atabul
anj
engat
hi
ni
ngamakhehl
ahur
ryup,
Mpendul
o
needst
obet
her
ewhenhi
sfat
her
ar
ri
vesf
rom mor
tuar
y”say
sMrZwane.
“
Boyhowar
eyouhol
dingup”
“
I’
mfi
ne”
“
I’
m sor
ryf
ory
ourl
oss”Hepul
l
smet
o
hi
sar
msandgi
vesmeat
ightsqueez
e.
“
Thanky
ouMrZwane”
“
Youcancal
lmeLami
..
.Ndl
ovukaz
i
Yami
”Hesay
shol
dingt
hechubby
beaut
if
ulwomanonherwai
st
“
PhakadeLami
”Thewomanr
epl
i
eswi
th
asmi
l
eonherf
aceandIr
emembert
he
bl
ackbeastt
hatwasper
sonal
i
zed
‘
PhakadeLami
’
“
Thi
sisMpendul
o..
.Boyt
hisi
smywi
fe
Sphel
i
le”
“
It
’sni
cet
omeety
ouMr
sZwane”I
st
ret
choutmyhandf
orahandshakebut
shehugsme,
shesmel
l
ssol
ovel
y.
“
Pleasedt
omeety
out
ooMpendul
o
pl
easecal
lmeSphel
i
leorSphe”Inod
wi
thmyheadaf
tert
hatwegeti
nthe
Vi
toandsi
tdownaf
terwehav
emade
sur
ethatwear
enotl
eav
ingany
thi
ng
andt
heboy
shav
esett
heal
arm.
“
Mpendul
othi
sismymot
her
”Sphel
i
le
say
spoi
nti
ngatanol
dwomansi
tt
ingat
t
hef
rontseat
“
SawbonaGogo”
“
Yebomf
anawami
unj
ani
kodwa”(
Himy
boyhowar
eyou)
“
I’
m wel
lthanksandy
ou”
“
I’
mfi
ne”
“
I’
m Mabut
hoBhengu,
Sphel
i
leand
Zanez
inhl
e’
sbi
gbr
other
”
“
I’
m Mpendul
o”weshakehands
“
Thi
sismyhusbandSbongi
mpi
l
o
Bhengu”Igaspwi
thshock
“
Uhm hi
”Ishakehi
shandt
oo.
“
Wear
eal
lsetr
ight
?”Lami
asksandwe
al
lchor
us“
Yes”
“
Youcangodr
iver
”
“
Wher
e’sy
ourwi
feMpendul
o?”Lami
asks
“
Uhm shewenthomeshewasn’
tfeel
i
ng
wel
l
,she’
spr
egnantsoIsenthert
omy
mot
hersot
hatshecant
akecar
eofher
”
Theyal
lcongr
atul
atemei
fonl
ythey
knewhowmuchIdoubtt
hosear
emy
ki
ds.
“
She’
scar
ryi
ngt
wins,
Mpendul
oscor
es
mul
ti
plel
i
key
ouuncl
eLami
”Londi
siz
we
say
s
“
NoLami
iswor
sehescor
edt
ri
plet
sand
quadr
upl
ets”Sbongasay
s
“
Iwantanot
herQuadr
upl
ets”Lami
say
s
l
ooki
ngathi
swi
fewi
thasi
desmi
l
e
“
Uyahl
any
a!”Sphel
i
lesay
sweal
lshar
ea
l
augh.
“
Thequadr
upl
etsar
e10y
ear
snow
sekumel
ebal
any
we”Hewi
ggl
eshi
s
ey
ebr
owsl
ooki
ngathi
swi
fe
“
Ifshegi
vesy
ouanot
her4ki
dst
heny
ou
hav
etodoubl
etheamounty
oupai
dfor
herl
obol
andodangekephel
ausudl
ala
ngonj
unj
ubearaf
tergi
vi
ngy
ou10ki
ds
uf
unai
sikol
osonke”Mabut
hosay
s
“
Tel
lhi
m wenast
rawber
ryev
ery
thi
ng”
“
I’
m ki
ddi
ngy
ooohi
m st
il
lrecov
eri
ng
f
rom hercr
azi
ness,
10y
ear
slat
er
y
esesest
hatwast
hel
ongest9mont
hs
ofmyl
i
fe”Weer
uptwi
thl
aught
er
Ther
estoft
hedr
ivei
sfi
l
ledwi
th
l
aught
erf
orsomer
easonIf
orgotabout
mypai
n.Uponar
ri
val
wegr
eetev
ery
one
andI
’
mint
roducedt
oev
eryf
ami
l
y
member
.Theyar
ewel
comi
ngbut
Qhawe’
smom doesn’
tseem t
oli
kemeI
don’
tknowwhysi
nceshewasmy
mom’
sfr
iend.Thef
oll
owi
ngdaywel
ay
myf
athert
orest
,thewaypeopl
ewer
e
t
alki
ngabouthi
m,heseemsl
i
kehewas
agoodmani
t’
sapi
tyInev
ergota
chancet
oknowhi
m.

-
I
’
m st
ucki
nli
mboIdon’
tknowwhatI
shoul
ddot
omakemymom f
eel
bet
ter
andwor
seshe’
sshut
ti
ngmeout
,no
mat
terhowIt
ryt
obet
her
eforher
.Iwas
supposedt
oleav
eforJohannesbur
gon
WednesdaybutIcoul
dn’
tleav
eher
al
one.What
evert
hati
shappeni
ngt
oher
i
ski
l
li
nghersl
owl
y,shehasbeen
l
ocki
ngher
sel
finherbedr
oom andnot
t
alki
ngt
oany
one.I
’
m af
rai
dthatshewi
l
l
r
elapse.
“
Mom i
snotf
eel
i
ngwel
lAunt
yNoma”
“
Youhav
ebeensay
ingt
hisf
orday
snow
Mi
raIwantt
oseeherl
etmei
n!”
“
She’
ssl
eepi
ngcomebackl
atert
oday
”
shecl
i
ckshert
ongueandshakeher
boot
yaway
.Dr
amaQueen!
“
Wheni
sDaddycomi
ngkant
imommy
?”
“
He’
sont
hewaybaby
”
“
He’
slat
e!Thepar
tywoul
dst
artnow!
”
She’
soutofpat
iencenowandmadas
f
uck.Todayi
sEmi
hle’
sbi
rt
hday
,
unf
ort
unat
elymom andIcan’
tmakei
tto
t
hepar
ty.Shewi
l
lbehear
tbr
okenbutI
wi
l
lmakei
tupt
oher
.Ther
e’ssomeone
att
hedoorsoIgoandat
tendwhoev
er
i
svi
sit
ing.
“
Mom Zo”
“
Wher
eisshe?
”shepushesher
sel
fin.
okaynogr
eet
ingnot
hingt
hisi
sso
unl
i
keher
“
Who?
”
“
Yourmot
her
”
“
Gogoz
iar
eyouher
etopi
ckmeup?
”
“
Yesmysweetbutl
etmet
alkt
oyour
gr
annyf
ir
st”Icanseet
hatshel
ooks
angr
yandIdon’
twantany
thi
ngt
hatwi
l
l
upsetmom soIf
oll
owhert
oeav
esdr
op
t
hei
rconv
ersat
ion.
“
Howcoul
dyouBongahuh!
!”
“
Ibethet
oldy
ou”mom say
scal
mly
“
Yeshet
oldme,
howcoul
dyouhur
tmy
br
otherl
i
ket
hat
!”
“
Idi
dn’
tdoi
tZo”
“
Thenhowdoy
ouex
plai
nthepi
ctur
es!I
t
houghty
ouar
ear
ightwomanf
ormy
br
otherbutcl
ear
lyIwaswr
ong!
!”
“
Whydon’
tyoumar
ryhi
myour
sel
fkesi
s,
uhl
ukanenami
!Howmanyt
imesdoI
hav
etosayt
hatIdi
dn’
tsl
eepwi
th
Zi
khal
i
!!Getoutofmyhousenx
!”Igasp
wi
thshock
“
I’
mleav
ingv
eleandst
ayt
hehel
laway
f
rom mybr
other
!”
“
Fucky
ou!
”Mom Zol
eav
eswi
th
Kamar
ia.Imakemywayt
omymom’
s
bedr
oom
”
Mom”
“
Leav
emeal
oneMi
ra!
”it
’sdar
kinher
e
andst
uff
y.Iopent
hewi
ndowsandt
he
cur
tai
ns.
“
Mama”Ipul
lthecov
ersawayf
rom her
head
“
Yini
!!
”
“
Ihear
dyouandmom Zowho’
sZi
khal
i
?”
“
Awuhl
ukanenami
tu!
”(Leav
emeal
one)
“
Ibel
i
evey
oumama”shel
ooksatme
wi
tht
ear
sinherey
es
“
Ibel
i
evey
out
haty
oudi
dn’
tsl
eepwi
th
whoev
ert
hatZi
khal
ii
s”
“
Youdo?
”Inodwi
thmyhead
“
Ohmybabynoonewant
stobel
i
eveme.
Ki
sfumi
ngwi
thangerhe’
sso
conv
incedt
hatIcheat
edonhi
m andZo
i
snotwi
l
li
ngt
ohearmysi
de”shebur
st
i
ntot
ear
s.Isi
tonherbedandhugher
”
Whathappenedmama”sheex
plai
nst
o
mewhathappened
“
YhooomamaI
’
mreal
l
ysor
rybuti
fyou
di
dn’
tsl
eepwi
thhi
mthenhowdi
dyou
andhi
m endupi
npi
ctur
est
oget
her
”
“
Idon’
tknowMi
ra,
Ireal
l
ydon’
tknow.
Thel
astt
imeIsawZi
khal
iwasMonday
atmuggandbeanaf
tert
hatIdr
ovet
o
t
hehospi
tal
.”
“
Coul
dtheybephot
oshopped?
”
“
Hesai
dtheyar
enot
”
“
May
behe’
smaki
ngt
hemi
staket
hey
ar
ephot
oshopped”
“
Idon’
tthi
nkhe’
smaki
ngami
stake,
K
knowsaboutt
heset
hingshewoul
d
knowi
fthepi
ctur
esar
ephot
oshopped
ornot
”
“
Soy
ouar
etr
yingt
osayt
omet
hat
t
hosepi
ctur
esar
ereal
?”
“
YesbutIdon’
tknowhowi
t’
spossi
ble
t
hisdoesn’
tmakesenset
omeMi
ra”I
t
r
eal
l
ydoesn’
tmakesense,
Iknowmy
mom andIcanseet
hatsher
eal
l
ydi
dn’
t
sl
eepwi
tht
hisZi
khal
i
“
Tel
lmeaboutt
hedayatmuggand
bean”Shet
ell
smeev
ery
thi
ng
“
Heor
der
edy
oucof
fee?
”
“
Yes”
“
Ohnocoul
ditbepossi
blet
hathe
dr
uggedy
ou.
”
“
Idi
dn’
tdr
inkt
hecof
fee”
“
Hay
imamasomet
hingi
snotr
ight
t
hough,
let
’sr
ever
sekancanet
ell
me
ev
ery
thi
ngf
rom t
hatdayunt
ily
ougot
o
t
hehospi
tal
toseeuncl
eKaf
termom
Zof
oundy
oupassedoutont
hesof
a”
“
Aft
ert
alki
ngwi
thZi
khal
iIwentt
othe
hospi
tal
,youcal
l
edmeandi
nfor
medme
aboutt
hechi
ckens.Iwentt
ocheckon
t
hem andf
oundt
hem st
il
lal
i
ve
t
hen.
.t
hen…Iwentt
obuymai
zeand
camebackhomeIt
hink”
“
Yout
hink?
”
“
Idon’
trememberbuy
ingmai
zeand
comi
ngbackhome”
“
Pleaset
ryhar
dermama”shecl
osesher
ey
est
ryi
ngt
oremember
“
Idon’
trememberbaby
”
“
Youar
enotonet
ofor
get
,it
’scl
ear
ly
t
hatmandi
dsomet
hingt
oyoubutI
don’
tknowhowandwhen.
”
“
OhmyGodi
fyourt
heor
yiscor
rectt
hat
meanshe.
..
he.
.hef
orcedhi
msel
fonme
Mi
ra”Iswal
l
owhar
dasr
eal
i
zat
ionhi
t
mehar
d
“
OhmamaI
’
m sosor
rybutwear
enot
sur
eaboutt
his”
“
ItmakessensewhyIcan’
tremember
”
shecr
ies
“
Mar
anawemama,
ify
out
oldme
soonerwewoul
dhav
egonet
othe
doct
ort
ocheckadr
ugi
nyoursy
stem
i
t’
sbeenday
snowI
’
m sur
eit
’shaswor
n
of
fandal
socheckt
hati
fyouhav
ebeen
v
iol
ated”
“
Idi
dn’
twantt
owor
ryy
ou”
“
Whenwi
l
lyoul
ear
ntot
rustt
hatIcan
handl
eany
thi
ng.Whydon’
tyoul
etmet
o
bet
her
efory
ouasy
ourdaught
er?You
don’
thav
etogot
hroughshi
tal
onewhi
l
e
I
’
m her
efory
ou.I
’
m notl
onger10y
ear
s
ol
dnj
e,I
’
m 23y
ear
s.”
“
I’
m sor
rybaby
”
“
Shhhdon’
tcr
ywewi
l
ldeal
wit
hthi
s
t
oget
her
,ift
hatasshol
evi
olat
edhewi
l
l
pay
”Ist
rokeherbackunt
ilshecal
ms
downt
hengof
ixsomet
hingf
orhert
o
eat
.Wespentt
hedayt
oget
heri
nbed
st
uff
ingour
sel
veswi
thj
unkand
wat
chi
ngmov
iesi
nmyl
apt
opunt
ilmy
mom doz
eof
f.Ideci
det
oor
deri
nfor
supperI
’
m noti
nthemoodf
orcooki
ng.I
hearabuz
zert
hinki
ngi
t’
sthepi
zzaguy
buti
t’somegoodl
ooki
ngguybuthi
s
scenti
ssof
ami
l
iar
“
Hel
l
omt
wana”
“
Mal
umeSox
?”
“
Yesi
t’
sme”
“
Wowy
oul
ook.
.beaut
if
ul”Hechuckl
es
andhugsme.
“
Ihear
dyoucanseecongr
atul
ati
ons,
I’
m
sohappyf
ory
ou”
“
Thanky
ou”Isaypul
l
ingapar
tandl
ook
athi
m.I
t’
sbeenawhi
l
eI’
m wonder
ing
whati
shedoi
ngher
e
“
Doy
ouwantsomet
hingt
odr
ink?
”
“
Nowher
e’sy
ourmom”
“
She’
ssl
eepi
ng”
“
Eish”
“
What
’sgoi
ngon?
”
“
Ihav
esomet
hingi
mpor
tantt
hatIneed
t
otel
lyouguy
saboutKamar
ia”
“
Whatabouther
”
“
Iwanty
ourmom t
obeher
e”
“
Mom i
snotf
eel
i
ngwel
l
,tel
lme”
“
Let
’ssi
tdown”wesi
tdownont
hehi
gh
chai
rs
“
Idon’
tknowhowt
osayt
hisMi
ra”
“
From t
hest
art
”Het
akesahugesi
gh
andex
plai
ntomebyt
het
imehe
f
ini
shesI
’
m st
unned
“
Gugudi
dwhat
!!
”
“
I’
m sor
ryMi
ra”Ichuckl
eandgetup
f
rom t
hechai
r.Iknewi
t!Iknewi
t
Kamar
iai
sMpendul
o’sbutwhen
Lwandl
e’
stestr
esul
tscameback
posi
ti
veIwasdef
eat
ed
“
Ican’
tbel
i
eveGugu,
howcoul
dshe!
!I
t
houghtshe’
smyf
ri
end!Wher
ethef
uck
i
sshe?
”
“
Mir
acal
m downpl
ease!
”NowI
’
m
bur
ningwi
thanger
.Heget
supf
rom t
he
chai
rtoo
“
Don’
ttel
lmet
ocal
m down!Iwantt
oki
l
l
t
hatwhor
eofy
our
swi
thmybar
ehands!
!
Shemademeaf
ool
!Iquest
ionedmy
sani
tyaf
tert
her
esul
tscameback!
!”
“
Youar
eangr
yIunder
standbutpl
ease
cal
m downl
et’
stal
kaboutourdaught
er
andt
henewchangeoft
hings”
“
Newchanget
her
e’snonewchange
Mpendul
o.Kamar
iahasaf
atherandi
t
wi
l
lst
ayl
i
ket
hatIdon’
twantt
oconf
use
mydaught
erany
mor
e”
“
Whataboutme?
”
“
Whatabouty
ou?Youar
etheonewho
choset
oli
stent
oGugul
ethuaf
tery
ou
t
oldmeandGogot
haty
ouar
esat
isf
ied
y
ouwon’
tdoDNAt
estqwi
qiqi
usuwenz
aiDNA.Youdi
dn’
tbel
i
eveme
Mpendul
o!”
“
Itol
dyou…”
“
Yeah,
yeah,
what
everbutI
’
m notgoi
ng
t
oconf
usemydaught
erj
ustbecause
y
oucoul
dn’
ttr
ustmeenoughwhenIt
old
y
oushe’
syour
s.”
“
Youar
esel
fi
shMi
rashe’
smydaught
er
t
oo.Iwon’
tal
l
owLwandl
etor
aisemy
daught
erwhi
l
eIknownowt
hatshe’
s
mi
ne”
“
Cal
lmesel
fi
sh,
sel
fdogwhat
everwhen
i
t’
scomest
omydaught
erIt
ake
ev
ery
thi
ngper
sonal
.Your
ememberhow
y
oubr
okeherl
i
ttl
ehear
twi
tht
hewor
ds
y
ousai
d?”
“
Iwashur
tandangr
yMi
raI
’
m sor
ry”
“
She’
sachi
l
dforcr
yingoutl
oud!Ev
eni
f
y
ouwer
eangr
yandhur
tyoushoul
dn’
t
hav
esai
dthosewor
dst
oher
!Youbr
oke
mybaby
’sl
i
ttl
ehear
tMpendul
o.I
fonl
y
y
oubel
i
evedmewhenIsai
dKamar
iai
s
y
our
s,noneoft
hiswoul
dhav
e
happened.Kamar
iahasaf
athert
he
dr
uggi
eremember
?Yesandhei
sthe
bestf
athert
oherandKamar
iar
eal
l
y
l
ovesherdr
uggi
efat
her
”
“
She’
smydaught
ery
ouar
ebei
ngunf
air
Mi
ra.Ideser
vet
obepar
tofherl
i
fet
oo!
”
“
Youcoul
d’v
ebeenherpar
tofherl
i
feas
mommy
’sf
ri
endaf
terf
indi
ngouty
ou
notherf
atheri
twoul
dhav
ebeeneasi
er
butnoy
ouchoset
ocutt
ieswi
thus
af
terhur
ti
ngmydaught
erwi
thy
our
wor
dswaz
ikhet
hel
aMpendul
o.You
choset
oli
stent
oyourwi
fesogot
oher
andt
ell
hert
ogi
vey
oubabi
est
haty
ou
won’
tdoubtt
ocal
lthem y
our
s.”
“
That
’sbul
l
shi
t!Iwon’
tal
l
owt
hat
,
Kamar
iai
smydaught
ershedeser
vest
o
knowt
hat
!”
“
Overmydeadbody
!Wenawhydi
dyou
l
i
stent
oyourwi
fe?Wasshet
her
ewhen
wewer
efucki
ng?Di
dshegi
vey
oua
condom?Thet
hingi
syoual
l
owedGugu
t
ocont
rol
youukudonsangamasende
y
azumunt
uangaf
ungaukut
hiubuqal
a
i
nquz
angay
e..
.”
“
Don’
tyouf
ucki
ngdar
etal
kmet
oli
ke
t
hat
!!
Het
akesmebysur
pri
sewi
thaback
sl
apt
hat
’sl
andsmeont
hef
loorI
scr
eam i
nagony
.
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayNkat
eko
Vumboni
Shi
vi
ti

CHAPTER71

“
Don’
tyoudar
etouchme!
!”Iwi
ggl
e
my
sel
ffr
om hi
sar
msashewast
ryi
ng
t
ogetmeupf
rom t
hef
loor
.Ican’
t
bel
i
evet
hathej
ustsl
appedme.
“
What
’sgoi
ngonher
e?”Mom say
sas
shewal
ksi
nfast
eni
ngherr
obe
“
Mal
umeSoxuy
angi
shay
amama”
(
uncl
eSoxi
sbeat
ingmeup)
“
What
!!
!”
“
I’
m sor
ryMr
sK,
Idi
dn’
tmeant
omar
a
nay
euMi
rauy
angi
del
ela”(
Mir
ais
di
srespect
ingme)
“
Andt
hatgi
vesy
ouar
ightt
obeatherup!
Whatki
ndofamanar
eyou,
beat
ingup
women!Si
es,
youseewhyInev
er
want
edy
ounearmydaught
er!Getout
ofmyhousebef
oreIki
l
lyounx
!!”
“
I’
m sor
rymt
wana”wi
tht
hatsai
dhe
wal
ksoutl
ooki
ngr
emor
se.Mymom
hel
psmeupf
rom t
hef
loorandmakes
mesi
tont
hehi
ghchai
r.
“
Ukushay
ekuphi
?”(
Wher
edi
dhebeat
y
ouup?
)Ipoi
ntonmycheeknex
ttomy
ey
e.I
tcanbar
elyopenandi
t’
sbur
ning
pl
usmyski
nreactf
ast
,it
’sv
ery
sensi
ti
ve.I
’
m sur
eit
’sswol
l
ennowand
r
ed
“
OhmyGoduy
ahl
any
alomf
ana
ukushay
engani
?”(
Ist
hisboycr
azywhat
di
dhebeaty
ouupwi
th?
)
“
Backsl
apmama”
“
YouknowwhatI
’
m cal
l
ingt
hepol
i
ce!
!”
Shewal
ksawaybutIgr
abherar
m
“
Mom wehav
ebi
ggerpr
obl
emst
han
l
ocki
nghi
m up”
“
Whatdoy
oumean”shel
ooksatme
“
He’
sKamar
ia’
sfat
her
”
“
I’
m notf
oll
owi
ngbaby
”
“
GuguandDrMkhwanaz
itemper
edwi
th
t
her
esul
tsmom.Mpendul
oisr
eal
l
y
Kamar
ia’
sfat
her
”Ibur
sti
ntoasobasi
t
r
egi
ster
stomet
hatIwasr
ightal
lal
ong
butIwasmadeaf
ool
.If
eltl
i
kemy
i
ntel
l
igencewasbei
ngi
nsul
tedbecause
Iwasbl
i
nd.
“
Ohmywor
d,howcoul
dthey
?Wai
tZo
di
dthet
estt
oomosandt
heysai
dthe
samet
hing”
“
Appar
ent
lymom ZoandDrMkhwanaz
i
wor
katt
hesamehospi
tal
soobv
iousl
y
i
twaseasyf
orhert
oswapt
her
esul
ts.
”
“
HawuJesuwaz
ewakhohl
akal
a
uGugu!
!”
“
She’
scr
uel
mamabot
hoft
hem wi
tht
he
doct
or!
”
“
Whywoul
dthi
sdoct
orhel
pGugudi
d
shepayhersomet
hing?
”
“
Not
heywer
eact
ual
l
yconspi
ri
ng
agai
nstus.I
nor
derf
ort
hedoct
ort
o
hel
pGugushehadt
ohel
pthedoct
ort
o
dest
royy
ouanduncl
eK.Thi
sdoct
ori
s
act
ual
l
yuncl
eK’
sfuckbuddy
”
“
Khosi
?!
”
“
Ift
hat
’shernamey
es!
”
“
I’
m goi
ngt
oki
l
lthosebi
tchesst
runasi
Mi
ra!
!”Shebangst
hecount
er
“
Appar
ent
lyKhosi
resi
gnedatt
he
hospi
tal
andl
eftnooneknowswher
e
shei
snow”
“
Sosher
anaway
?It
’sf
ineonedaywe
wi
l
lmeetandI
’
m goi
ngt
oshowherwho
am Ir
hhhaaal
okhuokuwuGugui
heee…”
“
Iwi
l
lfacet
hatwhor
emy
sel
f!Iwantt
o
l
ookheri
ntheey
eswhenIgi
veher
pi
eceofmi
ndnx
!”
“
I’
m sor
ryshhhhdon’
tcr
y”shepul
l
sme
t
oherst
omachandcomf
ort
smeonce
I
’
m cal
m sheget
sicef
rom t
hef
ri
dge,
wr
apsi
twi
thacl
otht
henpl
acei
tonmy
ey
e,Iwi
ncei
npai
n.
“
Sor
ry.
..
butbabyIcan’
tjustl
ett
hisgo
hesl
appedy
ou,
hemustpay
”
“
Kuy
afanamamahewi
l
lhebeoutwi
thi
n
adayort
wowi
thbai
l
”
“
Buthewi
l
llear
nal
essonwhydi
dhe
ev
ensl
appedy
ou”
“
Hewant
stobepar
tofKamar
ia’
sli
fe
andIt
oldhi
mthatwon’
thappen.He’
s
t
heonet
hatal
l
owedGugut
ocont
rol
hi
m”
“
Idon’
tli
ket
hatboyandf
orsl
appi
ngy
ou
Idi
sli
kehi
m ev
enmor
ebutnowt
hatwe
knowbabyhedeser
vest
obei
nhi
s
chi
l
d’sl
i
fe”
“
Deser
ve?Hai
boMamaMpendul
o
doesn’
tdeser
vet
obei
nmymoonl
i
ght
’s
l
i
fe.Fi
rstofal
l
,henev
erbel
i
evedt
hat
shei
shi
sandsecondl
ywhent
her
esul
ts
camebacknegat
ive,
hei
nsul
tedmy
babygi
rlandsai
dshemustnev
ercal
l
hi
m daddyhei
snotherdaddynowwhat
ar
ewegoi
ngt
osayt
oKam Kam?Daddy
wasj
oki
nghe’
syourf
ather
.Hay
ishe’
s
st
il
lyoungf
ort
his,
shewi
l
lbemor
e
conf
used”
“
Mpendul
owon’
tal
l
owt
hatMi
ra,
hecan
ev
ent
akeust
ocour
t”
“
Azi
l
imez
iyet
sheni
mama”(
sobei
t)
“
Ithi
nky
ouneedt
ocal
m downandt
hink
t
hist
hrough.Youcan’
tmakedeci
sions
wi
thy
ourhear
tinsi
tuat
ionsl
i
ket
his”
“
Iwantt
omeetmyf
ather
”Isayl
ooki
ng
ather
.
“
What
?”
“
Youhear
dmemama”
“
Hay
imeethi
mforwhat
?Henev
er
want
edusMi
ra.I
nfacthedoesn’
tex
ist
i
nourl
i
ves”Ichuckl
eandshakemy
headi
ndi
sbel
i
ef.That
’swhatIwant
ed
t
osee.
“
Ithoughtasmuchbuty
ouwantmet
o
al
l
owMpendul
otobei
nmydaught
er’
s
l
i
fe”
“
Youar
ecompar
ingt
wodi
ff
erentt
hings
Mi
ra.Yourf
atherki
ckedmeoutofhi
s
houseandcur
sedatmewhenIt
oldhi
m
Iwaspr
egnant
.Mpendul
owaswi
l
li
ngt
o
pl
ayt
her
oleoft
hef
atherunt
il
Gugul
ethuandKhosi
play
edus”
“
May
bei
fhest
art
edbyapol
ogi
zi
ngf
ir
st
t
hewayheex
itedourl
i
vesi
twoul
dhav
e
beenbet
ter
.Mpendul
othi
nkst
hewor
ld
oweshi
m mama.Hecan’
tjustcome
her
eaf
tert
hehar
shwor
dshesai
dtous,
especi
all
ytomydaught
erandex
pectus
t
ojustwel
comehi
m backi
ntoourl
i
ves.
I
fher
eal
l
ycar
esaboutKamar
ia’
swel
l
bei
nghewi
l
llett
hingsbe.She’
sst
il
la
chi
l
dmamashedoesn’
tdeser
veal
lthi
s
conf
usi
on.
”
“
Iheary
oubabybutIst
il
lthi
nky
ouneed
t
ocal
m downf
ir
stt
henmakea
deci
sion”
“
Thi
sisgoi
ngt
obr
eakLwenkosi
’
shear
t”
“
Whatwoul
dbr
eakmyhear
t?”Lwenkosi
say
sashewal
ksi
nwi
thasl
eepi
ng
Kamar
ia
“
Hai
boLwandl
eyoucan’
tjustbar
gei
n
myhousewi
thoutknocki
ng”
“
I’
m sor
rymama”
“
Isshesl
eepi
ng?
”Iask
“
Yesshe’
sti
red,
theyhadsomuchf
un”
“
Goputheri
nMi
ra’
sbedr
oom boy
”
Lwenkosi
nodsandwal
ksaway
“
Don’
ttel
lhi
myet
,Iwi
l
lsetupameet
ing
t
oletev
ery
oneknow.
”Inodj
ustt
henhe
wal
ksi
nandl
ooksatme.
“
Iwi
l
lwal
kyouout
”
“
Nisal
ekahl
emom Bonga”
“
Uhambekahl
eboy
”wewal
kout
.
“
Whathappenedt
oyourey
e?”
“
All
ergyr
eact
ion”
“
Yourmom sl
appedy
ou,
didn’
tshe?
”He
say
scl
enchi
nghi
sjaw.
“
Noshedi
dn’
t!Whyar
eyouassumi
ng
i
t’
sher
?”
“
Thenwhoi
sit
!”
“
Yazni
yangi
cikani
nomamakhof
or
bel
i
evi
ngmymom i
scapabl
eofdoi
ng
hor
ri
blet
hings!
!Yesshe’
snotper
fectno
onei
sbutshewi
l
lnev
erdowhaty
’al
l
accusi
ngherof
!!
”
“
Baby
..
breat
he.
..
bre­
atheokayandt
ell
mewhat
’sgoi
ngon”It
ryt
oopenmy
mout
hbutwor
dsf
ail
me,
Ibur
sti
nto
t
ear
s.Hepul
l
smet
ohi
sar
msand
comf
ort
sme.Isi
nki
ntohi
sembr
ace
t
aki
ngal
lhi
scal
mingscent
.
“
It
’sokaybaby
..
.don’
tcr
y”Wegetatt
he
backseatandhol
deachot
her
.
“
What
’swr
ongst
handwasenhl
i
ziy
o
y
ami
”Ipul
lbackbuthe’
shol
dingme
t
ight
lysoIl
ookupathi
ssex
ypai
rof
ey
est
hatar
efi
l
ledwi
thl
oveandwor
ry.I
f
eel
myhear
tshat
ter
ingi
ntopi
ecesasI
t
hinkabouthowt
hiswi
l
laf
fecthi
m.He
l
oveshi
sangel
facesomuch,
she’
sthe
r
easonwhyhedi
dn’
trel
apseaf
tert
he
Shakasaga,
andshe’
sther
easonwhy
hedeci
dedt
ohav
esessi
onswi
thMs
Jones.Thatl
i
ttl
egi
rli
shi
sev
ery
thi
ng,
he
l
oveshermor
ethanhel
ovesany
onei
n
t
hiswor
ldbutnowI
’
m af
rai
dal
loft
his
wi
l
lchange.Whati
fhechangest
heway
hef
eel
sabouther
?Whati
fthi
saf
fect
s
ourr
elat
ionshi
pbadl
y?I
’
m scar
edt
hings
wi
l
lnev
erbet
hesameaf
tert
hisandi
t
doesn’
thel
pthathej
ustl
osthi
sbaby
wi
thAy
anda.
“
Babyt
alkt
ome”
“
Promi
semet
haty
ouwi
l
lnev
erl
eav
e
menomat
terwhat
”
“
What
’sgoi
ngonMi
ra?
”
“
Justpr
omi
semepl
ease”
“
Iwi
l
lnev
erl
eav
eyounomat
terwhat
myl
ove”Icar
esshi
scheekst
ari
ngdeep
i
ntohi
sey
es
“
Ifeel
li
key
ouar
ehi
dingsomet
hingt
o
me”
“
You’
l
lknowwhent
het
imei
sri
ght
,now
Iwantt
ofeel
youdeepi
nsi
deofme”I
saysqueez
inghi
sdi
ck
“
Uyal
i
thandai
pipi
sthandwasami
”
“
Ngi
qhany
elwenj
ena”Ihi
demy
sel
fon
hi
schestasIgi
ggl
e.Wej
umpont
he
f
rontanddr
iveof
ftosecl
udedar
eaand
getdownt
obusi
ness.Icomef
ir
stt
hen
hef
oll
owsaf
terme.
“
Ilov
eyoumydol
l
face”Hesay
spant
ing
onmyneck
“
Ilov
eyout
oomycuddl
ecakes”He
pul
l
soutandst
ret
chov
ert
otakewi
pes
f
rom t
hegl
oveboxt
owi
pemebef
ore
get
ti
ngr
idofar
ubberonhi
msel
f.He
dr
ivesmebackhomeandIcan’
tbel
i
eve
t
hatI
’
m act
ual
l
ycr
yingt
hathe’
sleav
ing.
“
Iwi
l
lseey
out
omor
rowst
handwasami
,
don’
tcr
y”Hewi
pesmyt
ear
sandki
sses
myf
orehead.
“
Cal
lmewheny
ougethome”
“
Iwi
l
l.
..
ngi
yakut
handa­
”(Il
ovey
ou)
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Hewat
chesmegeti
nto
t
hehouse.Aunt
yNomai
sher
ebecause
hercari
spar
kedout
sideandIcanhear
herv
oiceasIappr
oacht
hel
i
vingr
oom.
“
Hel
l
oAuntNoma”
“
HeyMi
rawhyhav
eyoubeenl
yi
ngt
o
me”
“
AyawumeNomaj
ustt
ell
mewhat
’s
goi
ngon?Whatdoy
oumeanIsi
gned
ev
ery
thi
ngt
oZi
khal
i
”okayt
hisi
swhatI
hav
etohearj
ustt
obesur
eyoumay
nev
erknowwhati
fmom f
orget
sabouti
t
t
oo.Iset
tl
edownnex
ttomama.
“
I’
m notf
oll
owi
ngar
etr
yingt
osayy
ou
nev
ersi
gnedany
thi
ng?
”
“
NoIdi
dn’
t”
“
Yourl
awy
ercal
l
edmef
ewday
sbackt
o
i
nfor
m meaboutt
hechangeoft
hings
si
ncewel
lwewer
epar
tner
s.Iwas
bewi
l
der
edbecauseInev
erknewVusi
hadabr
other
”
“
Hai
boInev
ersi
gnedany
thi
ngmi
nal
et
al
onet
oZi
khal
iIhar
dlyknowt
heman
whywoul
dIgi
vehi
m myl
atehusband’
s
weal
th.
”
“
Okay
,okay
,may
beI
’
m sl
owwhat
’s
goi
ngonher
e”Aunt
yNomasay
s
f
anni
ngher
sel
f
“
Whati
sact
ual
l
ygoi
ngonher
eist
hat
t
heypl
ayedmymom,
it’
sei
thert
hey
dr
uggedhert
osi
gnt
hosedocument
s
ov
ert
othem ort
heyf
orgedher
si
gnat
ure.Myquest
ioni
smom’
slawy
er
wor
kingwi
tht
hisZi
khal
iorhewasal
so
pl
ayed”
“
Thi
sisf
raudmos!
”AuntNomasay
s
“
Exact
ly”Isay
“
All
Iwanti
stoknowi
swhathappened
andi
fhedi
dfor
cehi
msel
fonmeIdon’
t
car
eaboutt
heweal
thhecant
akei
t”
“
For
cedhi
msel
fony
ou?
”Mom nodsand
ex
plai
nst
oheraboutt
hepi
ctur
es.
“
OhBongaweneedt
ogot
othepol
i
ce”
Sheget
supandsi
tsnex
ttomom t
hen
pul
lhert
oherar
msassheweeps
si
l
ent
ly.
“
Wedon’
thav
epr
oof
”mom say
s
“
Wecangot
othedoct
ormamamay
be
t
hedr
ugi
sst
il
li
nyoursy
stem andy
ou
hav
en’
thadbat
hint
heseday
sI’
m sur
e
t
her
apeki
tex
am canst
il
lbedone”
“
Uthi
minaangi
gez
i”(
Arey
ousay
ingI
don’
tbat
h)AuntNomaandIl
augh
“
Vel
emamaev
ersi
ncet
hatdayy
oul
ock
y
our
sel
finy
ourbedr
oom”
“
ButI
’
m notsmel
l
ingoram I
?”She
sni
ff
sher
sel
f.Aunt
yNomaandIl
ookat
eachot
herl
augh.
“
Am It
hatbad?
”
“
Sesi
fi
leuf
ish”AuntNomasay
s,mom
pi
nchesherandwel
augh
“
Ift
hat
’ssot
henIhav
etobat
hnow,
it’
s
al
readyl
ateandi
t’
sSat
urdaydoct
ors
ar
eal
readycl
osed”
“
Thenwecangonowt
othehospi
tal
.Let
mecal
lmydoct
orandf
indouti
fshe’
s
av
ail
abl
emay
beshecansqueez
eusi
n”
shet
akesherphoneandcal
l
sher
doct
orst
henhangsup.
“
She’
saboutt
oknockof
fint
wohour
s
butshecansqueez
eusi
nsol
et’
sget
goi
ng”Aunt
yNomasay
s
“
Letmegochangeandl
ookdecent
”
mom get
supanddi
sappear
s.Mi
nut
es
l
atershecomesbackl
ooki
ngbeaut
if
ul
asal
way
s.
“
Wecango”Igot
ocheckonmy
daught
erast
heyl
eav
e,she’
ssl
eepi
ng
peacef
ull
ywi
thherpout
yli
ps.I
’
m
st
arv
ing,
IswearIcaneatawhol
ecow.
Thepi
zzai
sst
il
lwar
m soImakemy
sel
f
cof
feet
heni
ndul
geonmypi
zzaand
cof
feewhi
l
ewat
chi
ngt
v.Idon’
tknow
whenandhowdi
dIf
all
asl
eepbutI
’
m
wokenupbymom.
“
Gosl
eepi
nyourbedr
oom”Iy
awnand
cov
ermy
sel
fwi
thmyhand
“
Howdi
ditgo?
”
“
Got
osl
eepwewi
l
ltal
ktomor
row”Inod
anddr
agmy
sel
ftomybedr
oom.The
momentmyheadhi
tthepi
l
lowIdoz
e
of
f.Thenex
tmor
ningIwakeupi
naf
oul
mood.Ij
oinmymom anddaught
erwho
ar
ehav
ingbr
eakf
ast
.
“
Nomor
ningmommy
,howar
eyou?
”
“
‘Mor
ninghowar
eyouf
eel
i
ngt
oday
”I
f
akeasmi
l
e
“
Isi
tthatt
imeoft
hemont
h?”Ishakemy
headno
“
YouandLwandl
ehadaf
ight
?”
“
GoshcanIhav
emybr
eakf
asti
n
peace!
”
“
Hay
iwenangi
zokushay
aphel
ami
na!
”
(
Heyy
ouIwi
l
lbeatt
heshi
touty
ou!
)I
saynot
hinganddi
shupf
ormy
sel
fthen
eatwhi
l
eli
steni
ngt
oKamar
iagoi
ngon
andonaboutt
hepar
ty.Icant
ell
that
shehadf
unandI
’
m sohappy
.I’
m
di
stur
bedbymyr
ingi
ngphone
“
Hel
l
o”
“
Heysi
s”she’
scr
ying
“
Emywhat
’swr
ong?
”
“
Pleasecome,
Ineedy
ou”
“
Wher
ear
eyou?
”
“
‘I
nmydad’
shouse”
“
OkayI
’
m comi
ngnow”Ihangupand
mom i
slooki
ngatme
“
Ihav
etogo,
Emi
hlei
scr
ying”
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thher
?”
“
Idon’
tknow”Ical
lLwenkosi
wit
hin15
mi
nut
eshear
ri
ves.Weki
ssf
ir
stt
hen
dr
iveof
ftoUncl
eK’
shouse.Uncl
eK
openst
hedoorf
orus,
hehascr
utches
si
ncehehasacastonhi
sleg
“
Mi.
.Mi
ra.
..
Lwandl
ewhatar
eyout
wo
doi
ngher
e?”
“
I’
m her
eforEmi
hle,
shecal
l
edme”Isay
“
Uhm I
..
um”hest
utt
ers
“
Babehowwoul
dyoul
i
key
oureggs?
”A
f
emal
evoi
cesay
s.Ichuckl
eindi
sbel
i
ef
wow!Heopenshi
smout
hbutwor
dsar
e
notcomi
ngoutofhi
smout
h
“
Baber
epl
y,she’
swai
ti
ngf
orananswer
”
Isayl
ooki
ngathi
mint
heey
es.
“
It
’snotwhaty
out
hinki
tisMi
ra…”Icut
hi
m of
f
“
Cany
oupl
easel
etmei
n,myl
i
ttl
esi
s
needsme”Hemakesspacef
orusand
showmeEmy
’sr
oom.
“
Emywhat
’swr
ong”Isaysi
tt
ingonher
bed
“
I.
.I
..
.I
’
m scar
ed”Shebur
sti
ntot
ear
s,I
pul
lhert
omyar
msandhol
dhert
ight
ly
“
Shhhdon’
tcr
y,I
’
m her
eokay
..
.j
ustt
ell
mewhat
’swr
ong”
“
Ist
art
edmyper
iodsandi
t’
spai
nful
”
“
Ohbaby
,don’
tcr
ythi
sisnor
mal
.I’
m
sur
eatschool
theyt
aughty
ouabout
t
heset
hings”
“
YesbutIdi
dn’
tthi
nkt
heywi
l
lst
artso
soon”
“
I’
m sor
rymybaby
.Doy
ouhav
epads”
sheshakesherheadno.
“
OkayI
’
m goi
ngt
ogobuyt
hem and
somet
hingf
ort
hepai
nwhi
l
eyout
akea
bat
h”
“
Okay
”Igetupandwal
koutasshe
pr
epar
eher
sel
ffort
hebat
h.If
ind
Lwenkosi
busyeat
ingwi
thUncl
eKbut
t
hewomani
snott
her
e
“
Asambe”(
Let
’sgo)Igi
vehi
m adeat
h
st
areandhedoesn’
tneedmet
otel
lhi
m
t
wice.
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thmydaught
er?
”I
i
gnor
eUncl
eKandwal
koutwi
th
Lwenkosi
.Wegeti
nthecaranddr
iveof
f
af
terIt
oldhi
m wher
eIwanthi
mtot
ake
ust
o.
“
Usuy
afobel
aukudl
aokukhandweul
oya
si
s”
“
Hawubaby
…”
“
Don’
tHawubabymeLwenkosi
your
uncl
ehur
tmymom andi
t’
sdoesn’
ttake
hi
m asecondt
orepl
aceherwenay
ou
ar
ebusyeat
ingt
hatwoman’
sfood!
”
“
Hehur
tyourmom how?
”Ihuf
fandsay
not
hing,
wear
ri
veatt
hemal
l
,Iaskf
or
hel
pfr
om t
heassi
stantandLwenkosi
payt
henwedr
ivebackt
oUnckK’
s
housei
nsi
l
ence.It
ell
Emi
ever
ythi
ng
sheneedst
oknowandshei
shappyt
hat
Icame.
“
Thanky
ousi
s”
“
Youwi
l
lbeokayr
ight
?”
“
Yeswhydi
dn’
tyouandmommycome
t
omybi
rt
hdaypar
ty?
”
“
Mom wasn’
tfeel
i
ngwel
l
,Ihadt
olook
af
terherbutwewi
l
lmakei
tupt
oyou
okay
”
“
OkayIl
ovey
ousi
s”
“
Ilov
eyout
oobabygi
rl
”Iki
ssher
f
orehead
“
Yourcov
ersar
enotmessedup”she
shakesherheadno
“
Okayi
fyouneedany
thi
ngcal
lmeokay
”
“
Okay
”Wehugt
henImakemywayout
ofherbedr
oom.
“
WecangoLwenkosi
”
“
Mir
awhat
’sgoi
ngwi
thmydaught
er,
she’
snott
alki
ngt
ome”
“
She’
sfi
ney
ouhav
enot
hingt
owor
ry
about
,theper
sony
oushoul
dbewor
ri
ed
abouti
syourf
iancée,
ther
e’spossi
bil
i
ty
t
hatshewasdr
uggedandr
apedbyt
his
Zi
khal
iman.Sheneedsy
our
ightnow
mor
ethanev
erbutnoy
ouar
ebusy
accusi
ngherofcheat
ingandr
epl
aci
ng
herwi
thhoesar
ghasambeLwenkosi
”
(
let
’sgoLwenkosi
)
“
Whatdoy
oumeanshewasdr
ugged
andr
aped?
”Uncl
eKsay
slooki
ngatme
“
Mir
apl
easet
alkt
ome”
“
Whyshoul
dIt
alkt
oyoumosy
oudi
dn’
t
gi
vemymom achancet
oex
plai
ntoy
ou
whatr
eal
l
yhappenedandont
opoft
hat
y
oudon’
tbel
i
eveher
.Yenashedi
dn’
t
ev
ent
akeasecondt
otr
usty
out
haty
ou
di
dn’
tki
l
lthatwomanbuty
oubel
i
eve
shewoul
dcheatony
ou,
uyangi
phox
a
y
azuncl
eK”Iwal
koutandLwenkosi
f
oll
owsme.
“
Babywhathappened?
”Hesay
saswe
ar
edr
ivi
nghome.It
ell
him what
happened
“
YhoIdi
dn’
tknowbaby
,I’
m sor
ry.How
i
syourmom”
“
Eveni
fyoudi
dn’
tknow,
youdi
dn’
thav
e
t
oeatt
hatwoman’
sfood!
”
“
Jesuswhat
’swr
ongwi
thy
out
oday
uy
angi
l
wisanj
e!!
”(Youar
efi
ght
ingme!
!)
Ibur
sti
ntot
ear
s.Idon’
tknowwhendi
d
hepul
lov
er,
he’
snowonmysi
deand
comf
ort
ingme
“
What
’swr
ongbaby
”
“
Uyangi
thet
hisanj
ewena”(
youar
e
shout
ingatme)
“
I’
m sor
ryokaybuty
ouar
edi
ff
icul
t
t
oday
”
“
Mxm mi
ghtaswel
lshutupcozt
her
e’s
‘
but
’iny
ourst
atement
”
“
OkayI
’
m sor
rymyl
ovef
orshout
ingat
y
ou”Hewi
pesmyt
ear
sandki
ssesmy
nose.Ismi
l
eandki
sshi
sli
pst
henhe
j
ogst
ohi
ssi
deandgeti
n.Hedr
ivesof
f
wi
thmepr
essedagai
nsthi
sshoul
der
.
-

Icoul
dn’
tsl
eepl
astni
ghtt
hinki
ngabout
whatt
ranspi
redbet
weenMi
raandI
.
Thi
ngswer
enev
ersupposedt
oescal
ate
l
i
ket
hat
,she’
stheonet
hatpushedme,
nott
hatI
’
m say
ingIwasr
ightf
or
sl
appi
ngher
.I’
m sodi
sappoi
ntedi
n
my
sel
fInev
ert
houghtonedayIwi
l
lev
er
l
aymyhandonawomanl
etal
oneMi
ra.
“
I’
m comi
ng!
!”IshoutasIshuf
fl
emy
f
eett
owar
dst
hedoor
.I’
m sur
pri
sedt
o
seemymom,
shehar
dlyev
ercomesi
n
myapar
tment
.
“
Mom whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e”she
pushesherwayi
nandwal
ktol
i
ving
r
oom.Icl
oset
hedoorandf
oll
owher
,I
f
indhersi
tt
ingont
hecouchandsi
ton
t
heot
hercouch
“
Youhav
ebeeni
gnor
ingmycal
l
sev
er
si
ncey
oul
eftandwheny
oucomeback
y
oudon’
ttel
lmey
ouar
ebackwhy
Mpendul
ohuh?
”
“
Howdi
dyouknowI
’
m back?
”
“
Ical
l
edQhaweandhet
oldmey
ou
camebacky
est
erday
.Whyar
eyou
i
gnor
ingmycal
l
s?”
“
Whathappenedbet
weeny
ouanddad?
”
“
Itol
dyounj
e”
“
Wel
lwhathet
oldmei
snotwhaty
ou
t
oldme.I
sitt
ruet
haty
ouwant
edhi
mto
choosey
ouov
erhi
swi
feandki
dsand
whenhecoul
dn’
tgi
vey
out
hat
,your
an
awaywi
thus”
“
Doesi
tmat
terhowi
t…”Icutherof
fasI
f
eel
angerbur
ningwi
thi
nme
“
Ofcour
sei
tdoesmama!Youmadeus
bel
i
evedadl
efty
oupr
egnantwhi
l
eyou
ar
etheonewhol
eft
!Youknowwhat
makesmesi
cki
sthaty
ouwer
einv
olv
ed
wi
thamar
ri
edman!
!”
“
Heydon’
tyoudar
erai
sey
ourv
oiceat
me,
I’
myourmot
herIdeser
vey
our
r
espect
!”
“
Respectmyf
oot
,youcoul
dn’
trespect
y
our
sel
fandont
opoft
haty
oul
i
ed!You
l
i
edaboutev
ery
thi
ng!He’
sdeadandI
wi
l
lnev
ergetachancet
oknowhowi
t’
s
l
i
ket
ohav
eaf
ather
!”
“
I’
m sor
rymysonI
…”
“
Getoutmama”
“
Boyuy
angi
xosha?
”
“
I’
m si
ckandt
ir
edofwomeni
nmyl
i
fe
wi
tht
hei
rli
es!
”
“
Mpendul
o…”
“
Hambamama!
”(Gomama!
)Shewi
pes
hert
ear
sandget
supt
henwal
ksout
.
Womenar
eal
lthesame!Conni
vi
ng,
unt
rust
wor
thy
,ungr
atef
ul,
li
ars,
cheat
andsel
fi
sh!I
fit
’snotmymom whol
i
ed
aboutourf
atherandmadeusbel
i
evehe
wasabadmanwhor
anawayf
rom hi
s
r
esponsi
bil
i
ty,
it’
sGuguwhopl
ayedme
i
nthemostcr
uel
wayev
erandr
obme
of
fmydaught
erasi
fitwasnotenough
t
hatshecheat
edonmewi
thmyuncl
e.I
don’
twantt
oment
ionMi
rawho’
s
deny
ingmear
ightt
obepar
tofmy
daught
er’
sli
fe.I
t’
snotmyf
aul
tGugu
andherf
ri
endpl
ayedme,
shehasno
r
ightt
odot
his.Kamar
iai
smydaught
er
andIwon’
tletLwandl
erai
seherwhi
l
eI
knownowt
hatshe’
smi
ne.I
fIhav
eto
got
ocour
tthensobei
t.

-
Ist
areathi
scont
actnumber
sonmy
phonescr
eencont
empl
ati
ngt
ocal
lhi
m
butIaskmy
sel
fwhatdi
ff
erencewoul
dit
makenow?Ihav
ebeent
ryi
ngt
ocal
lhi
m
ov
ert
hesef
ewday
sandIl
efthi
m
t
housandmessagesbuthehasnev
er
cal
l
edback.Ican’
tbel
i
eveher
eal
l
ythi
nk
Iwoul
dcheatonhi
m.I
t’
scl
eart
hatK
andIwer
erushi
ngt
ogetmar
ri
edt
her
e’s
l
ackoft
rustbet
weenus.I
treal
l
ybr
eaks
myhear
tthathedoesn’
tbel
i
eveme.I
won’
tli
eandsayIdon’
tmi
sshi
m
becauseIdoandev
erysi
ngl
esecondof
t
heday
.Ican’
twai
tfort
her
esul
tst
o
comebackandf
indouti
fthatbast
ard
r
eal
l
yhadhi
swaywi
thme.Thet
hought
ofi
tmakesmyski
ncr
inge.It
ossmy
phoneawayandwai
tforev
ery
one.I
hav
esummonedt
heNkosi
fami
l
yand
Mpendul
o.Theyal
lar
ri
veatt
hesame
t
ime,
good.
Zoi
sthr
owi
ngdagger
satmeandIdon’
t
under
standhowcanshet
akeK’
ssi
de
wi
thouthear
ingmysi
deoft
hest
ory
.I
t
houghtwear
esi
ster
s,I
’
m so
hear
tbr
okeny
az.Ir
eal
l
yappr
eci
atet
he
suppor
tmydaught
eri
sgi
vi
ngme
t
hough.I
tjustmademer
eal
i
zet
hat
ev
enpeopl
ecant
urnt
hei
rbacksonme
butmydaught
erwi
l
lal
way
sbewi
thme
nomat
terwhat
.Thegr
eet
ingshav
e
beenshar
ed
“
I’
m sur
ey’
al
lwonder
ingwhyIhav
e
cal
l
edt
hismeet
ing.Iwon’
ttakemuchof
y
ourt
imesoIwi
l
lletMpendul
otel
lyou”
Theyal
ll
ookatMpendul
owhocl
ear
shi
s
t
hroatf
ir
stt
hennar
rat
est
hest
ory
.By
t
het
imehef
ini
shest
ensi
oni
sthi
ckand
i
tcanbecutwi
thakni
fe
“
Thi
sisbul
l
shi
t!UnamangaSox
!”
Lwandl
esay
s
“
Lwandl
emi
ndy
ourl
anguage”Hi
s
f
atherr
epr
imandshi
m
“
Idon’
tunder
stand,
Idi
dthoset
est
my
sel
f”
“
YesbutKhosi
swi
tchedt
hem up”Isay
“
OhmyGod!
”Zogaspsast
ear
sgl
i
sten
i
nherey
es
“
Nononot
hisi
snott
rue!Kamar
iai
smy
daught
er!Soxwhatt
ri
cksar
eyou
pl
ayi
ng?
”
“
I’
m notpl
ayi
nganyt
ri
ckswecandot
he
DNAt
estagai
n.”
“
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
his?Howcoul
dInotsee
i
t!
”Zosay
s
“
Don’
tbehar
dony
our
sel
fZo,
how
woul
dyouhav
eknownt
hatt
her
ear
e
peopl
ewhower
epl
anni
ngt
otemper
wi
tht
her
esul
ts”Herhusbandconsol
es
her
“
Butst
il
lBheki
Iwassupposedt
osee
t
his.Iwascar
eless”mydaught
eri
s
weepi
ngsi
l
ent
lynex
ttomesoIpul
lher
i
nmychestandembr
aceher
“
Nowi
tmakessense,
mom di
dsay
Kamar
iai
snotaNkosi
andwedi
dn’
t
bel
i
eveher
”
“
Sowhatdoy
ouex
pectust
odoSox
?
Cel
ebr
atewi
thy
ou?
”Lwandl
easks
bi
tt
erl
y
“
NoIwantt
obepar
tofmydaught
er’
s
l
i
fe”
“
Aft
ert
hewayy
oul
efthercr
yingand
br
okenandIpi
ckedupt
hepi
eces!
”
“
Lwandl
eehl
i
saumoy
a”(
Lwandl
ecal
m
down)
“
Dadpl
easedon’
ttel
lmet
ocal
m down.
Ij
ustf
oundoutt
hatmyonl
ydaught
eri
s
notmydaught
er,
Ihav
eev
eryr
ightt
obe
angr
y!Whatmakesmeangr
ieri
sthat
Soxi
sther
easonwear
eher
e,I
accept
edandl
ovedKamar
iawhenshe
wasnotev
enmi
net
henhehadt
odoa
DNAt
est
!”
“
Hai
boy
oucan’
tbl
amemef
ordoi
nga
DNAt
est
!Iwant
edpr
oof
!”
“
NoIdon’
tbl
amey
ouf
ordoi
ngaDNA
t
estbutIbl
amey
ouf
orsl
eepi
ngwi
th
f
ri
ends!Youar
etheonewhocausedal
l
oft
his!
!GuguandMi
rawer
eli
kesi
ster
s
t
heny
ouhadt
ocomebet
weent
hem by
f
ucki
ngt
hem bot
h!!
”Lwandl
eishur
ti
ng
andhecan’
tev
enhi
dei
t.
“
Iwaswr
ongandIadmi
tbutwear
enot
her
efort
hat
.Ideser
vet
obepar
tofmy
daught
er’
sli
fe”Mi
rabur
sti
ntol
aught
er
andweal
ll
ookather
.
“
Thener
vey
ouhav
etosayt
hataf
tert
he
wayy
ouex
itedourl
i
ves!Youhur
ther
,
y
out
hinkshewantt
oseey
ouaf
terwhat
y
ousai
d?Youdon’
tdeser
vet
obenear
mydaught
erMpendul
oespeci
all
ynot
af
terhi
tt
ingmecl
ear
lyy
ouhav
eanger
i
ssues.Whati
fyoubeatmydaught
er
up?
”
“
I’
m sor
ryf
orsl
appi
ngy
ouMi
rabutI
’
m
notamonst
er,
Iwon’
thi
tmydaught
er”
“
Whatwi
l
lst
opy
ouaf
tersay
inghur
tful
wor
dst
oherandbacksl
appi
ngme?
”
“
SoImustwat
chLwandl
erai
semy
daught
erov
ermydeadbodyMi
ra.
Kamar
iai
saXul
unotaNkosi
!”
“
That
’st
het
hingwi
thy
ouMpendul
oyou
ar
edemandi
ngmydaught
erasi
fshe’
s
y
ourpossessi
on.
”
“
She’
sourdaught
er!
!!
”
“
Bei
ngherf
atherdoesn’
tgi
vey
ouar
ight
t
odemandher
!Fi
rstofal
lyoushoul
dbe
apol
ogi
zi
ngf
ort
hewayy
out
reat
edus.
I
t’
snotourf
aul
tthatGuguchangedt
he
r
esul
twedi
dn’
tdeser
vet
hewayy
ou
t
reat
edusaf
ter
war
ds.Secondl
yst
op
act
ingl
i
keweowey
ou,
weowey
ou
not
hing.Thi
rdl
yyoushoul
dhumbl
e
y
our
sel
fandbegr
atef
ult
oLwenkosi
for
r
aisi
ngy
ourdaught
erandpi
cki
ngupt
he
pi
ecesaf
tery
oubr
okeherhear
t.Last
butnotl
easti
fyour
eal
l
ycar
eabouther
t
heny
ouwi
l
llett
hingsbeunt
ilshe’
sol
d
enought
ounder
standt
his!
”Mi
rasay
s
“
I’
m sor
ryf
ort
hewayIt
reat
edy
ouguy
s
andt
hewor
dsIsai
dtoourdaught
er.I
wasangr
yanddi
sappoi
ntedhowev
eri
t’
s
notanex
cusef
ormybehav
iour
.Inev
er
sai
dyouowemeany
thi
ng,
wear
eal
l
v
ict
imi
nthi
s.Thanky
ouLwandl
efor
r
aisi
ngmydaught
erandI
’
m notsay
ing
y
oushoul
dst
opshe’
sst
il
lyourchi
l
d,al
l
I
’
m aski
ngi
sforachancet
obeal
soi
n
herl
i
fenami
njengobabakhe”
“
Ithi
nkt
hat
’swor
kabl
ewewi
l
ltel
lher
t
hatshehast
wodaddi
esandwhen
she’
sol
derwewi
l
lex
plai
ntoher
ev
ery
thi
ng”Mi
rasay
s
“
ButIwanthert
oknowI
’
m herr
eal
f
ather
”
“
It
’sei
thert
hatornot
hingatal
lkeh”
“
Whyungi
ciki
sel
angomt
anami
?”
“
I’
m pr
otect
ingherf
rom conf
usi
on
Mpendul
o,she’
saki
d!”
“
Okayf
ineIcanwor
kwi
tht
hat
”Lwandl
e
get
supandt
akeSoxbysur
pri
sewi
tha
punchonhi
sface
“
That
’sf
orbacksl
appi
ngmydol
l
face”
Hewal
ksoutandZof
oll
owshi
m.If
eel
f
orhi
m shamet
hismustbet
ear
inghi
s
hear
tapar
t.

“
Lwandl
e..
Lwandl
e…Lw­
andl
e”Icanhear
mymom cal
l
ingmeasIdr
iveoutt
he
goodt
hingi
sIcamewi
thmycar
becauseIwascomi
ngf
rom wor
kIdon’
t
ev
enknowwher
etobegi
n?Fat
herGod
doesn’
tlov
eme,
Idon’
tdeser
vet
obea
f
athercl
ear
lyt
hiswhatFat
herGodi
s
t
ryi
ngt
osayt
ome.I
t’
shur
tsdeepdown
i
nmyhear
tandIcanev
enf
eel
thepai
n
i
nmybones.Lor
dknowshowmuchI
l
ovet
hatl
i
ttl
egi
rl
,shei
smyal
l
.She’
s
t
her
easonwhyIbr
eat
hebutnowIf
eel
l
i
keshe’
sbei
ngsnat
chedawayf
rom me.
Inev
erhadpr
obl
em wi
thherbei
ng
Mpendul
o’sf
rom t
hef
ir
stpl
acebuthow
Iwi
shIwasnev
erf
ool
edandmadet
o
bel
i
eveshe’
smi
nebi
ologi
cal
l
y.If
ind
my
sel
fpar
kedi
nNospl
aceandst
epout
oft
hecart
henmakemy
sel
ftowar
dst
he
door
.Sheopenst
hedoorf
orme
“
Lwandl
ecomei
n”Imakemywayi
n,
she’
swr
appedi
nat
owel
andhas
anot
heroneonherhead
“
Am Idi
stur
bingy
ou?
”
“
Nol
overIj
ustf
ini
shshower
ingandI
’
m
l
azi
ngar
ound”
“
Wantany
thi
ngt
odr
ink?
”
“
NoI
’
mfi
net
hanky
ou”weset
tl
eont
he
couch.
“
Tal
ktomel
overboy
”
“
Iwantt
oleav
ethi
spl
aceandgof
ar
away
”
“
Whywhathappened”Iex
plai
ntoher
whathappenedandIcanf
eel
tear
s
bur
ningi
nmyey
esbutIwon’
tlett
hem
f
all
.Ther
ear
etwowomeni
nmyl
i
feI
showmyv
ulner
abi
l
ityt
oandt
hat
’sMi
ra
andMom.
“
Ohl
overboyI
’
m sor
ryIdon’
tev
enknow
whatt
osay
”
“
Lif
eisunf
airNos,
whydoIkeepl
osi
ng
babi
esandt
heoneIt
houghtIhav
eis
act
ual
l
ynotmi
ne.
”
“
OnedayGodwi
l
lbl
essy
ouwi
thbabi
es
Lwandl
edon’
twor
ryy
ouar
est
il
lyoung
may
beGodi
spr
epar
ingy
out
obet
he
gr
eat
estf
atherev
er”Ismi
l
efai
ntl
y
may
beshe’
sri
ghtbuti
tdoesn’
tmakei
t
hur
tless.Shet
akesmyhandsi
ntoher
s
andsqueez
ethem.
“
Kuz
olungay
ezwal
et’
sgetdr
unkand
f
orgetaboutourpr
obl
ems”
“
I’
m her
efory
out
alkt
ome”
“
I’
minl
ove”
“
That
’sagr
eatt
hingmos”
“
Noi
t’
snott
hegoodt
hingIwasnot
supposedt
ofal
lfort
hisguyi
tjust
happenedandIcan’
thel
pmy
sel
f”
“
Mmht
alkt
otheguyandt
ell
him may
be
hef
eel
sthesame”Shel
ooksatmeand
smashesherl
i
psonmi
ne.Ipushher
“
Woahwhat
’sgoi
ngon”
“
It
’sy
ouLwandl
engi
yakut
handami
na,
notasy
ourPr
eci
ousi
nIsi
fungobutas
Nosi
mangal
i
so.
”Wow!asI
’
m st
il
lonmy
shockedmode,
sheki
ssesme,
theki
ss
i
sdi
ff
erentf
rom t
heonesweshar
e
whenwear
eact
ing,
it’
shy
pnot
ic.
“
Lwandl
e!”Ihearmymom’
svoi
ceand
pushNosaway
,she’
snotal
onebutwi
th
Mi
rawhohast
ear
sinherey
es.Shi
t!
CHAPTER72(
unedi
ted)

Ohmydearl
ordshewi
l
lnev
erf
orgi
ve
meespeci
all
yaf
terIpr
omi
sedhert
hat
t
her
e’snot
hinggoi
ngonbet
weenme
andNosbutnowaf
terseei
ngusl
i
p
l
ocki
ngshewon’
tbel
i
eveme.Ir
unaf
ter
herandgr
abherar
m
“
BabyI
’
m sor
ry.
”
“
Whyungenz
asomar
aLwenkosi
huh”
(
Howcany
oudot
hist
ome)
“
It
’snotwhaty
out
hinki
tisbaby
….”
“
Iaskedy
ouandy
oupr
omi
sedmet
hat
t
her
e’snot
hinghappeni
ngbet
weent
he
t
woofy
oui
t’
sjustwor
ksot
ell
mewasi
t
st
il
laboutwor
k?”Tear
sar
est
reami
ng
downherf
aceandi
t’
sbr
eaki
ngmyhear
t
t
hatI
’
m ar
easonf
orhert
ear
sbut
honest
lyIwascaughtof
fguar
d.Iwas
shockt
oev
enr
eact
.
“
NobabybutIcanex
plai
n”
“
Igav
eyouachancet
oex
plai
nbuty
ou
l
i
edt
omesoIdon’
twantt
ohearany
l
i
esf
rom y
ou!
”Sheget
sinmymom’
s
carandIl
ookatherasshecr
ies.Mom
l
ooksatmewi
thadeadl
ook.
“
Yousuchadi
sappoi
ntmenty
azi
!”
“
Whydi
dyouf
oll
owmemar
amama!
”
“
Iwaswor
ri
edabouty
ousowasshey
ou
j
ustst
ormedof
f”
“
Noj
ustsayi
tthaty
ouf
oll
owedme
becausey
out
houghtI
’
m goi
ngt
osnor
t
dr
ugs.Whycan’
tyout
rustmewhenIt
ell
y
out
hatIwi
l
lnev
erdot
hatshi
tagai
n!”
“
It
’snott
hatIdon’
ttr
usty
ouboy
…”
“
Ayv
elemamai
t’
sbecauseoft
hat
!
Can’
tyougi
vemet
hebenef
itofdoubt
!
Looknowwhathappenedandy
ouand
Mi
ragott
hewr
ongendoft
hest
ickand
shewon’
tbel
i
evemear
gh!
”Igeti
nmy
caranddr
iveof
f.I
’
m soangr
yIhat
ethat
mom al
way
sthi
nkIwi
l
lresor
ttodr
ugs
ev
eryl
i
ttl
esecondI
’
minpai
n.Imadea
mi
stakeandr
esor
tedt
odr
ugst
onumb
t
hepai
nbutIf
oughthar
dtost
opt
hat
shi
t,i
t’
sseemsl
i
kemypastwi
l
lal
way
s
def
inemeandIf
ucki
nghat
ethat
.I
shoul
dhav
edr
ivent
oTshepof
rom t
he
f
ir
stpl
aceandnott
oNosbutt
het
hing
i
sNosandIhav
egr
ownsocl
oseandI
t
houghtourr
elat
ionshi
pwaspur
ely
f
ri
endshi
pbutnowIseet
hatIgav
ehera
wr
ongi
mpr
essi
on.Mi
rai
stheonet
hatI
l
oveandwannabewi
thf
orev
er.
“
Sur
eboy
”webumpedf
istt
henIgr
aba
chai
randsi
tnex
ttohi
m.
“
What
’sgoi
ngony
oul
ookangr
y”I
ex
plai
ntohi
m
“
Tjousej
aiv
ini
sbal
i
”
“
Tel
lmeabouti
tandMi
rawon’
tbel
i
eve
me”
“
Youhav
etomakeherbel
i
evey
oubr
a.I
al
way
ssuspect
edt
hatgi
rli
sint
oyaz
”
“
Inev
ernot
icedIt
houghtwewer
e
f
ri
ends”
“
Howcany
oubef
ri
endswi
thaf
emal
e
whi
l
eyouhav
eagi
rl
fr
iendory
oudon’
t
hav
eapr
obl
em i
fMi
racanhav
eamal
e
f
ri
endt
oo?
”
“
Hay
imal
efr
iendy
ani
?I’
m hermal
e
f
ri
endandherl
over
.Nosi
sacol
l
eagueI
can’
tjustcutt
ieswi
thher
”
“
Ehhybuty
ouhav
etosor
tthi
sout
bef
orei
tdest
roy
syourr
elat
ionshi
p”
“
YeahIwi
l
ltel
lNosi
mangal
i
sot
hatI
don’
tfeel
her
.Il
oveMi
rabr
aIr
eal
l
y
hopeshewi
l
lfor
giv
emeandbel
i
eve
me”myphoner
ingsi
t’
sMr
s
Bucki
ngham Ii
gnor
eherIknowt
hatshe
wantt
oknowi
fIhav
emademymi
ndup.
“
Whoi
sthat
?”
“
Myboss”
“
Thenwhydon’
tyouanswerher
?”I
ex
plai
ntohi
m ev
ery
thi
ng
“
Wowboyt
hisi
samaz
ingmos!
”
“
YeahbutwhataboutMi
ra?
”
“
EishnehandI
m scar
edf
ory
oubr
a
si
ncenowshecansee”
“
Whatar
eyout
ryi
ngt
osaybr
a?”
“
Phel
amanj
eshecanseewhati
fshe
meet
saguyshef
indat
tr
act
iveorwhat
i
fsher
eal
i
zet
hatshewaswi
thy
ou
becausey
ouaccept
edherbl
i
ndasshe
wasshet
otal
l
ydoesn’
tlov
eyou.
”Il
ook
athi
m
“
Hay
iMi
ral
ovesmeshewi
l
lnev
erdo
t
hatt
ome!
”
“
I’
m notsay
ingshewi
l
lI’
mjustsay
ing
br
a.”Iwoul
dbel
yi
ngi
fIsayt
hatdi
dn’
t
gett
omebecausei
tdi
d.Isweart
hat
wi
l
lbet
heendofme.
-

I
’
m aboutt
oleav
ewhenIseeher
wal
ki
ngi
nrubbi
ngherey
esandherl
i
ps
pout
ingIassumeshewassl
eepi
ng.
She’
sabeaut
if
ulangel
Ihav
eev
erseen.
“
Dragongr
annywher
e’smommy
?”Just
t
henMi
rawal
ksi
nwi
tht
ear
sinherey
es.
“
What
’swr
ongsweet
hear
t?”Mr
sKsay
s
“
Myey
eispai
nful
”shesay
slooki
ngat
me.Icanseet
hatshewantmet
ofeel
badandi
t’
swor
king.Ir
eal
l
ydi
dn’
tmean
t
osl
apher
.
“
Ithi
nkweshoul
ddoi
tnowMi
ra”Isay
poi
nti
ngatKamar
iawi
thmyheadwho’
s
nest
ledagai
nsthergr
anny
’schest
.
“
Okay
”sheset
tl
edownnex
ttohermom
“
Pumpki
n?”
“
Mommy
?”
“
Doy
our
emembert
hatman?
”
“
Whati
shedoi
ngher
emommyhe
scar
esme”
“
Hewant
stoapol
ogi
zef
orshout
ingat
y
ouhedi
dn’
tmeant
oscar
eyouandhe
wantt
obey
ourdaddyagai
n”
“
Ninababamama”(
Ihav
eadaddy
mommy
)
“
Hut
aki
kuwanababawawi
l
itu
wasi
chanamaal
um wanababawawi
l
i”
(
don'
tyouwantt
ohav
etwodaddi
es
onl
yspeci
algi
rl
shav
etwodaddi
es)
“
Snohav
eonedaddy
,Emi
hlehav
eone
daddywhyshoul
dIhav
etwodaddi
es
andt
hismani
snotsweetl
i
kemy
daddy
”myhear
tsi
nks
“
Comeher
ebabyandl
et’
stal
k”
“
Ha.
ah”sheshakesherheadv
igor
ousl
y
“
I’
m sor
ryf
orshout
ingaty
out
hatday
myangel
daddywasangr
ybutIwantt
o
makei
tupt
oyoupl
easecomeher
e”
Shest
art
scr
yingandMi
rat
akesher
f
rom hermom t
hendi
sappear
swi
thher
.
Isi
ghheav
il
y
“
Justgi
vehert
ime”
“
Ithoughtki
dsf
orgeteasi
l
y”
“
Wel
lti
meshav
echangedandi
tdoesn’
t
hel
pthatshe’
swayt
oosmar
tforher
age”
“
Thanky
ouf
orev
ery
thi
ngMr
sK.I
shoul
dgetgoi
ng”
“
Bye”Igetupandl
eav
ewi
thaheav
y
hear
t.Idr
ivet
othemal
ltobuy
somet
hingf
ormydaught
ermay
bei
t
mi
ghthel
ptowi
nherback.

I
t’
sbeenaweeksi
nceIhav
edonet
he
t
est
sandt
odayI
’
m att
hehospi
tal
for
myr
esul
t.I
’
m scar
edIdon’
twantt
oli
e
butmydaught
eri
sher
ewi
thmeand
assur
ingmet
hatev
ery
thi
ngi
sgoi
ngt
o
beokay
.
“
MrsKhumal
o”
“
Nokubongapl
easeorMi
ss
Mt
himkhul
u”
“
Ther
esul
tsar
ebackf
rom t
hel
ab”
“
Okay
”Ibr
eat
houtl
oudl
yandmy
daught
ersqueez
esmyhandt
ight
ly.
“
Letmej
ustsayy
oudi
dgoodbycomi
ng
f
orwar
dwedi
dfi
ndadr
ugi
nyourbl
ood
andur
ine”If
eel
tear
sbur
ningi
nmyey
es
sohedr
uggedme.
“
Pleasecar
ryon”Shepagest
hrought
he
document
sandl
ooksatme
“
For
tunat
elywedi
dn’
tfi
ndanyphy
sical
ev
idenceofsex
ual
assaul
t”
“
Real
l
y?Ar
eyousur
e?”
“
YesI
’
m sur
e”
“
Oht
hanky
oul
ord!
”Mi
raandIshar
ea
hug.I
’
m sohappy,
thatal
lIwant
edt
o
hearIdon’
tcar
eaboutany
thi
ngel
se.We
di
scussmor
eaboutev
ery
thi
ngt
henI
askf
ort
hecopyofmyr
esul
ts.
“
Iwi
l
ldr
opy
ouof
fathomeIhav
etogo
somewher
e”
“
Okay
..
.I
’
m cr
avi
ngf
orper
iper
ichi
cken
f
eet
”Idr
ivet
osomef
oodcont
ainerand
getherper
iper
ichi
ckenf
eet
.
“
Thanky
oumommy
”shel
i
cksherl
i
ps
andeat
sherf
eetbet
weenmoans
“
Hay
iidl
akahl
e”shegi
ggl
es
“
Mnandi
don’
tyouwantsome?
”
“
Azi
nany
amai
zi
nyawoz
enkukhu”
“
Oho”sheeat
sthef
inger
sandIshake
myheadi
ndi
sbel
i
eft
hatshedoesn’
t
ev
enspi
toutt
hebones.
Idr
opherof
fathomet
hendr
ivet
oK’
s
house.He’
ssur
pri
sedt
oseemeand
he’
snotal
onebuthe’
swi
thZo.I
t’
sa
goodt
hinkIf
oundt
hem t
oget
her
becauseIhav
esomet
hingt
oshowt
hem.
“
Greet
ings”Ki
stheonl
yonewhoagr
ees.
Ican’
tst
opmy
sel
ffr
om l
ooki
ngathi
m
andatt
hismomentIj
ustwantt
othr
ow
my
sel
finhi
sar
ms.Imi
ssedhi
m so
muchbutIwi
l
lcont
rol
mysel
f.
“
Ihav
ether
esul
tsher
ethatshowst
hatI
wasdr
uggedIwasn’
tunawar
eof
ev
ery
thi
ngt
heydi
dtomeand
f
ort
unat
elyhedi
dn’
tfor
cedhi
msel
fon
me.
”It
hrowt
her
esul
tsont
hegl
ass
t
abl
eandmakemywayout
.

I
’
m sohappyt
hatmymom wasn’
traped
t
hatwoul
dhav
eki
l
ledherbutIwi
shshe
cansendt
hatbast
ardt
ojai
l
.Hedoesn’
t
deser
veKhumal
o’smoneyaf
terwhathe
di
d!I
t’
sbeenaweeksi
nceIf
ound
Lwenkosi
li
plocki
ngwi
thNosandIwas
sohear
tbr
okenbutIgav
ehi
m achance
t
oex
plai
nev
ery
thi
ng.Ibel
i
evehi
m
becauseIt
rusthi
m butI
t’
snotsi
tt
ing
wel
lwi
thmet
hatt
heyar
ewor
king
t
oget
her
.Iwi
sht
heycanr
epl
aceher
wi
thsomeoneel
sebutwhati
fthatgi
rl
al
sof
all
sinl
ovewi
thhi
m.Iwoul
dgo
cr
azyIswearsoi
t’
sbet
terIf
ocuson
t
rust
inghi
m especi
all
ynowt
hathei
s
goi
ngov
erseas.I
’
m sohappyf
orhi
m
t
hisi
shugebutI
’
m abi
thur
t.Shoot
inga
ser
iest
akesal
most10mont
hst
hatj
ust
ay
earnj
e.IguessIwi
l
lhav
etobe
st
rongandsuppor
thi
m.Ihopet
he
di
stancewon’
tcauseast
rai
ninour
r
elat
ionshi
p.Leehav
efoundour
apar
tmentandmom hasal
readyputt
his
houseon24pr
oper
tyf
orsal
e.HowcanI
f
orgett
oment
iont
hatBabShakawas
ar
rest
ed,
yepuncl
eKdi
dthet
hingst
hat
ar
edonebyhi
m onl
yagai
nyeeepi
but
I
’
m sodi
sappoi
ntedathi
m abouthi
s
r
eact
iont
owar
dst
hissi
tuat
ioni
ncl
udi
ng
mom Zo.It
houghtt
heyknowmymom
buti
t’
scl
ear
lyt
heydon’
t.Mymoonl
i
ght
st
il
lhasn’
twar
medupt
oMpendul
oam I
cr
uel
tosayuy
alay
ekauMpendul
o.Don’
t
l
ookatmel
i
ket
hatIwanthi
mtowor
k
har
dtowi
nherbacksot
hathewon’
t
messupagai
n.If
indSi
bongi
l
eandmy
daught
erwat
chi
ngcar
toonswhi
l
e
eat
ingpopcor
ns.Yesshecamef
ort
he
v
isi
tandI
’
m sohappy
.
“
Mommyy
ouback”say
smymoonl
i
ght
“
Yesmyl
ove”Iki
ssherf
oreheadbef
ore
set
tl
ingnex
ttohert
heni
ndul
geonmy
chi
ckensf
eet
“
CanIhav
esomemommy
”
“
Ziy
ababast
handwasami
”
“
Haaamamauy
anci
shana”Si
bongi
l
e
andIl
augh
“
Takeonedon’
tcr
yforme
masubabel
wa”shet
akest
hef
ootand
munchoni
t.
“
Ayi
babi
nzeeemamashhhhl
hahhh”
shehi
ssesandsqui
ntsherey
es
causi
ngSi
bongi
l
eandIt
olaugh.
“
Ukughal
amt
anami
uyababel
wanj
e”I
canf
eel
Sbosh’
sgaz
eonmeasI
cont
inueeat
ingmychi
ckensf
eet
.
“
What
?”
“
Not
hing”
“
Comeony
ouhav
ebeenl
i
ket
hissi
nce
y
est
erday
”
“
Pleasedon’
tpani
canddon’
tshoutat
me”
”
Okay
”
“
Ithi
nky
ouar
epr
egnant
”Il
augh
“
NoI
’
m notmysboshsbosh”
“
Youar
egl
owi
ngMi
ra,
youhav
e
cr
avi
ngs,
youl
ovesex,
youar
eeasi
l
y
i
rr
it
abl
e,y
ouar
eacr
ybaby
”
“
May
beal
loft
hisgotdowi
thmysi
ght
don’
tyout
hink?
”Shel
aughs
“
Howi
t’
sgott
odowi
thy
oursi
ght
?”
“
Forst
art
erst
hegl
owbabeshav
ing
si
ghti
sagr
eei
ngwi
thme.Cr
avi
ngsar
e
f
orev
ery
one.Il
ovesexwhodoesn’
tlov
e
sexSboshsexi
sgoodespeci
all
ywhen
y
ouhav
eamanwhoknowshowt
ouse
t
het
ool
”Iwhi
stl
eandshegi
ggl
es
“
Ihav
eal
way
sbeeneasi
l
yir
ri
tabl
eanda
cr
ybaby
”
“
Whataboutmaas?Youcan’
tst
and
maasbuty
est
erdayy
ouwer
eeat
ing.
..
”
“
NononoSi
bongi
l
est
opi
t!
”It
ryt
o
di
gestwhatshej
ustsai
dbuthow?We
hav
ebeenusi
ngpr
otect
ion
“
Ican’
tbepr
egnantSi
bongi
l
e!NoI
’
m not
pr
egnant
!”
“
Whati
spr
egnantmommy
?”
“
Ther
e’sonl
yonewayt
ofi
ndout
”
“
Sbosh”Iwhi
sper
“
LindaneandIar
etr
yingf
orababysoI
hav
ebeenkeepi
ngsomewecanuse
t
hose”
“
Asi
nnow”Ibi
tet
hei
nsi
deofmymout
h
“
Yesi
fyouar
eokaywi
tht
hat
”It
akea
hugebr
eat
heandnodmyhead.Weget
upandwal
ktomybedr
oom l
eav
ing
Kamar
iawat
chi
nghercar
toons.Wear
e
usi
ngt
hesamebedr
oom t
hathowcl
ose
wear
e.Shegi
vesmet
wopr
egnantt
est
s
andImakemywayt
othebat
hroom and
domybusi
nesst
henwal
kbackaf
ter
washi
ngmyhands.I
’
m paci
ngupand
downIf
eel
li
keI
’
m goi
ngt
olosemy
mi
nd.Ican’
tbepr
egnantohj
esu!
“
Heycal
m down”shehol
dsmef
rom
behi
ndandki
ssesmyneck
“
Comesi
tdown”
“
Whati
fim pr
egnantSbosh”
“
Theni
t’
sokay
..
.pr
egnanci
esar
enott
he
samest
handwasami
”
“
No!Idon’
twantanot
herchi
l
d!”She
makesmesi
tdownt
henshet
akest
he
t
est
saf
terawhi
l
eont
hebedsi
det
abl
e
“
Arey
our
eady
”Inodr
eluct
ant
ly,
she
l
ooksatt
het
est
sthenme
“
Bot
hoft
hem t
heyshowt
wor
edl
i
nes”
“
Whi
chmeansI
’
m notpr
egnant
?”
“
Youar
epr
egnantmyl
ove”
“
Nononono”Ishakemyheadi
n
di
sbel
i
ef
“
Cal
m downandbr
eat
he.
..
Mir
abr
eat
he”
“
I’
m pr
egnant
?”Icr
y
“
Shhhdon’
tcr
ymyl
oveev
ery
thi
ngi
s
goi
ngt
obeokay
.I’
m sur
eLwandl
ewi
l
l
behappyespeci
all
yaf
terwhat
happened”Sheenv
elopesmei
nher
ar
ms
“
Nohe’
sgoi
ngt
oov
erseashedoesn’
t
needt
hisbabynordoI
”
“
Andmom ohGodmymom i
sgoi
ngt
o
ki
l
lmeSi
bongi
l
e”
“
SisBongawon’
tki
l
lyouMi
rast
op
wor
ryi
ngy
ouar
est
ressi
ngt
hebaby
”
“
Idon’
twanti
tSi
bongi
l
e”
“
Iknowst
handwasami
buthe’
sher
e
nowandt
her
e’snot
hingwecando.You
needt
otel
lLwandl
ebef
orehel
eav
esf
or
Amer
ica”
“
Iwon’
ttel
lhi
m IknowLwandl
elwenkosi
hewi
l
lcancel
ever
ythi
ng,
such
oppor
tuni
ti
escomesoncei
nal
i
fet
ime
hecan’
tmi
sst
his.I
t’
sgoodf
orhi
s
car
eer
”
“
Youcantt
hinkf
orhi
m babesl
ethi
m
makehi
sdeci
sion”
“
Ist
il
lhav
en’
tmademymi
neIneedt
ime
t
othi
nkokay
”
“
Don’
ttel
lmey
ouwantt
oabor
tthe
baby
”
“
Idon’
tknowokay
!!CanIbeal
one
pl
ease”sheget
supandwal
ksout
l
eav
ingmecr
yingmyl
ungsout
.

It
aket
heenv
elopeandt
akeoutt
he
document
sthenr
eadt
hem.Zoi
s
l
ooki
ngatmei
nant
ici
pat
ionsoIgi
ve
hert
hedocument
saf
terr
eadi
ngt
hem
“
OhmyGodIf
eel
hor
ri
blet
hatIt
hought
shecheat
edony
ou”Zosay
s
“
Ihav
etogoseeherZopl
easet
akeme
t
oher
”
“
I’
m notr
eadyt
ofacehernowI
’
m so
ashamedofmy
sel
fwhatki
ndofasi
ster
Iam?
”
“
Youwi
l
ldr
opmeof
fIwi
l
lcal
lanuber
”
“
Sot
hismeanshecoul
dhav
ebeen
r
apedwhi
l
ewewer
ebusyaccusi
ngher
ofcheat
ing”al
onet
earr
oll
sdownher
cheek
“
HowcanIbesost
upi
dZo?Ishoul
d
hav
eseent
his!
”
“
Let
’sgo”It
akemycr
utchest
henwe
l
eav
e.Thedr
ivei
ssi
l
entwear
ebot
h
al
l
owi
ngourmi
ndst
orunawaywi
th
t
hought
s.Iwassost
upi
dtonotbel
i
eve
herandwhatmakesmehat
emy
sel
fis
t
hatev
enwhenMi
rat
oldmeIt
hought
shewasj
ustdef
endi
nghermom.The
womanshef
oundher
eismyol
dfr
iend
f
rom uni
ver
sit
y,shesl
epther
ebecause
wewer
ehav
ingdr
inksandcat
chi
ngup.
Wehav
eal
way
scal
l
edeachot
herpet
names,
she’
smar
ri
edt
oherwomany
es
she’
sal
esbi
an.
“
Goodl
uck”
“
Thanky
ousi
s”Thegat
ehasbeen
openedf
ormesoImakemywayi
n
whi
chpr
ovest
obeast
ruggl
esi
nceI
’
m
notuset
ocr
utches.If
inal
l
ymakei
tint
o
t
hehouseandweset
tl
eont
hecouch.I
wonderwhyshe’
snotki
cki
ngmeoutof
herhouse.Idon’
tdeser
vet
obeher
e
“
SnookumsI
’
m soashamedt
obeher
e
i
nfr
ontofy
ouandt
ell
yout
hatI
’
m sor
ry
Inev
erbel
i
evedi
nyou.I
’
m sor
ryt
hatI
i
nsul
tedy
oucal
l
ingy
oucheapwheny
ou
wer
eact
ual
l
yvi
olat
ed.Ngi
yax
oli
sa
st
handwasami
….”shecut
smeof
fwi
th
herf
ingeronmyl
i
ps
“
Shhhi
t’
sokayIunder
stand”
“
Nonot
hingi
sokayBongaI
’
m st
upi
d!I
shoul
dhav
eseent
his!Iwassupposed
t
obel
i
evey
oust
handwasami
youar
e
mywi
feandIl
ovey
ousomuch.I
’
m
sor
ryf
oral
l
owi
ngt
hatasshol
etocome
bet
weenus!Iwassupposedt
opr
otect
y
ouf
rom ev
ent
ouchi
ngy
ou,
he’
sgoi
ng
t
opayf
ort
his!I
’
m goi
ngt
oki
l
lhi
m”
“
Dontdoany
thi
ngt
ohi
m mynamehav
e
beencl
ear
edt
obecal
l
edacheatandhe
di
dn’
tsex
ual
l
yabusemesohecant
ake
t
heKhumal
ori
chesIdon’
tcar
e”
“
Het
ookKhumal
ori
ches.
..
how?
”
“
Idon’
tknowi
fhei
swor
kingwi
thmy
l
awy
erort
hedr
ugt
heydr
uggedmewi
th
mademesi
gnedev
ery
thi
ngt
othem.
”
Mybl
oodboi
l
sthi
sfool
thi
nkshecando
whathewantwi
thmywi
fe!Whot
hehel
l
doeshet
hinkhei
s!?
“
Whot
hef
uckdoeshet
hinkhei
shuh?
Noy
ouar
enotgi
vi
ngawaywi
thy
our
r
ichesj
ustl
i
ket
hat
.Theyneedt
opayal
l
oft
hem!
!”
“
Cal
m downokay
,Ihav
eal
way
swant
ed
t
ogi
veawaywi
thKhumal
o’smoney
.”
“
Butnotl
i
ket
hisBongaandIdon’
tthi
nk
Vusi
woul
dbehappyaboutt
his”
“
Justl
eti
tgookay
”
“
I’
m sor
ryst
handwasami
”
“
It
’sokayKIunder
standt
haty
oudon’
t
t
rustmebutIwon’
tdef
ini
tel
ybewi
th
someonewhocan’
ttr
ustme.Ihav
e
nev
ergi
veny
ouar
easont
onott
rustme
buti
tdi
dn’
ttakey
ouasecondt
obel
i
eve
t
hatIcheat
edony
ou.Iwant
edsobad
f
ory
out
obel
i
evemebuty
oudi
dn’
t,
f
unnyenoughwhenKhosi
putt
hat
l
i
nger
iei
nyourbedr
oom Ibel
i
evedt
hat
y
ouwer
enotcheat
ingonme.Ibel
i
eved
t
haty
oudi
dn’
tki
l
lthatwomant
hatwas
f
oundi
nyourboot
.Youj
ustshowedme
t
oget
herwi
thy
oursi
stert
haty
ouar
e
peopl
eIcantr
elyon.I
’
m sor
ryIcan’
tdo
t
his”Tear
sar
est
reami
ngdownherf
ace,
shet
akesoutherr
ingandIst
opherby
cuppi
ngherhands
“
Snookumspl
easedon’
tdot
hist
ome.
I
t’
sokaybeangr
yatme,
cur
seatme,
scr
eam atme,
youcanev
ensl
apme
st
handwasami
butdon’
tenduspl
ease.
Il
ovebabyIl
ovey
ousomuch.Iwasj
erk
Iknowandv
eryunf
airpl
easef
orgi
ve
me”
“
I’
m sor
ryKIcan’
t”Icupherf
aceand
l
ookathert
ear
yey
es
“
Ngi
yakut
handaNokubongangenhl
i
ziy
o
y
ami
yonke”(
Ilov
eyouNokubongawi
th
al
lofmyhear
t)
“
Nami
ngi
yakut
handaKhuz
ani
kodwa
ut
handoal
wanel
e…”(Il
ovey
out
oo
Khuz
ani
butl
ovei
snotenough.
.)
“
Pleasedon’
tdon’
tsayt
hat
”
“
I…”Ishutherupwi
thaki
ssandweki
ss
pour
ingourhear
tsi
ntot
heki
ss.I
mi
ssedherl
i
pssomuchi
nfactI
mi
ssedev
ery
thi
ngabouther
.Shebr
eaks
i
taf
terawhi
l
epant
ingandst
aresatme
“
Don’
tleav
emeIwoul
ddoany
thi
ngy
ou
wantmet
odot
oshowy
ouhowsor
ryI
am.
”
“
I’
m sor
ryIcan’
t”shewi
pesal
onet
ear
onmycheekwi
thhert
humb
”
Pleasel
eav
e”
“
Bon…”
“
Kpl
ease”Isi
ghwi
thdef
eatandgetup
f
rom t
hecouch
“
Youar
efor
get
ti
ngt
her
ing”
“
Keepi
t”Il
i
mpmywayoutl
eav
ingmy
hear
tbehi
nd.
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayMakobeLaNka
t
eKo
&Gugul
ethuPor
ti
a
CHAPTER73

Ican’
tbegi
ntodescr
ibet
heshameI
’
m
f
eel
i
ngf
ort
hewayIr
eact
edt
owar
dst
he
BongaandZani
’
ssi
tuat
ion.Ishoul
d
hav
egi
venherachancet
oex
plai
n.I
t
akeahugebr
eat
heandpr
esst
he
i
nter
com.Thegat
eopensandIdr
ivei
n.I
f
inal
l
ygai
nedcour
aget
ofaceheraf
tera
daywel
ear
nedt
het
rut
h.
“
Zocomei
n”Shemakesaspacef
orme
t
ogeti
n.
“
Hel
l
osi
si”
“
Hi.
..
come”If
oll
owherasshel
eadst
he
wayt
othel
ounge.Weset
tl
edownnex
t
t
oeachot
her
.I’
m soashamedt
oev
en
l
ookatheri
ntheey
es.
“
Unj
ani
”(Howar
eyou)
“
I’
mfi
neandy
ou?
”Imanaget
ost
eal
a
gl
anceather
,she’
snotf
ineandherl
i
ght
ski
nisnotdoi
ngheranyj
ust
ice,
she’
s
ev
enpal
e.
“
I’
m sor
ryBonga,
Ihav
ebeenav
erybad
si
sterandIapol
ogi
zef
rom t
hedeepest
ofmyhear
t”
“
It
’sokayZo”shesay
scal
mly
,whyi
s
shenotscr
eami
ngatme?
“
It
’snotokayBonga.Iwassupposedt
o
gi
vey
ouachancet
oex
plai
nnotj
umpt
o
concl
usi
on.Ihav
enoex
cusef
ormy
behav
iour
,ast
hesi
sterIcl
aimt
obet
o
y
ou.Ishoul
dhav
ereact
edbet
ter
.I
al
l
owedemot
ionst
ogetbet
terofme,
I
’
m sosor
ry”
“
It
’sf
ineZoIunder
stand,
Ireal
l
ydo.
Khuz
ani
isy
ourbr
otheraf
teral
landi
f
t
het
abl
eswer
etur
nedIwoul
dhav
eal
so
beenangr
yhowev
erIwoul
dhav
egi
ven
y
ouachancet
oex
plai
n.Zowehav
e
beenf
ri
endsf
ory
ear
sIt
houghty
ou
knowmebet
ter
,inf
actIt
houghtwear
e
si
ster
sbuty
ourr
eact
ionpr
ovedt
ome
t
hatIwasbl
uff
ingmy
sel
f.
”
“
I’
m sor
ryBonga”I
’
mint
ear
snow
“
Ireal
l
yneededmysi
sterbymysi
de,
especi
all
yaf
terIdi
scov
eredt
hatt
her
e
wasapossi
bil
i
tyt
hatIwasr
aped.I
t
r
eal
l
ybr
okemyhear
tthatt
het
wo
peopl
eIl
ovedt
urnedt
hei
rbacksonme.
Youandy
ourbr
othershowedmet
hatI
can’
trel
yony
oubot
h.Iunder
standt
hat
t
her
ewasnoev
idencebutmay
be,
just
may
bei
fyout
wogav
emeachancet
o
ex
plai
nyouwoul
dhav
ereal
i
zedt
hatI
’
m
al
soav
ict
imi
nthi
s.”It
akeherhands
i
ntomi
ne
“
I’
m sosor
ryBonga,
pleasef
orgi
veme.I
can’
tlosey
oupl
easel
etmeshowy
ou
howsor
ryIam.Idon’
twantt
olosemy
oneandonl
ysi
ster
.”
“
I’
m sor
ryZobutIcan’
tkeeppeopl
ewho
don’
ttr
ustmei
nmyl
i
fe.I
t’
sfi
neour
chi
l
drenar
est
il
lyoungany
thi
ngi
s
possi
bleespeci
all
ynowt
hatLwandl
eis
mov
ingt
oAmer
icabutI
fithappenst
hat
t
hei
rrel
ati
onshi
plastl
ongert
omar
ri
age
wewi
l
lbest
ri
ctl
ymot
her
sinl
awnot
hing
mor
eandnot
hingl
ess.Cl
oset
hedoor
ony
ourwayout
.”Sheget
supand
di
sappear
sleav
ingmedef
eat
ed.Idr
ag
my
sel
fupandl
eav
e.Isawi
tinherey
es
t
hatshemeantev
erysi
ngl
ewor
dI’
m so
hear
tbr
oken.Ihav
ebeenknocki
ngon
mybr
other
’sdoorbutt
her
e’sno
r
esponsesoImakemywayi
n.The
housel
ookl
i
keamessev
ery
thi
ngi
s
upsi
dedown.
“
Zani
”Ical
loutf
orhi
m asIsear
chf
or
hi
mthenf
indhi
minhi
sst
udyr
oom
sl
eepi
ngont
hecouch.Ther
e’sanempt
y
bot
tl
eofwhi
skeyont
hef
loorand
f
ramedpi
ctur
eonhi
sst
omach.It
akei
t
andl
ookathi
m wi
thBonga.Theyl
ook
sohappyi
nthi
spi
ctur
e,he’
shol
dingher
f
rom behi
nd.Iwonderwhatt
heywer
e
l
aughi
ngat
.Theyr
eal
l
ymakeabeaut
if
ul
coupl
eandt
heyl
oveeachot
herso
much.Ipl
acei
tonhi
sdeskandwake
hi
m up
“
Zani
wakeup”Heopenshi
soneey
e
andl
ooksatme.
“
Wakeup,
howl
ongwer
eyoupassed
out
”Hey
awnsandsi
tsupst
rai
ghtt
hen
l
ookatmewi
thbl
oodshotr
edey
es.I
set
tl
enex
ttohi
m.Hel
ooksl
i
kehe’
s
car
ryi
ngt
hewor
ldonhi
sshoul
der
s
“
Arey
ouokay
?Hav
eyout
akeny
our
meds?Di
dyoueat
?”Heshakeshi
shead
no
“
Youcan’
tski
pyourmedsZani
,howar
e
y
ougoi
ngt
orecov
er.Al
cohol
won’
theal
y
ou”
“
Doy
out
hinkIcar
eaboutheal
i
ngand
r
ecov
eri
ng?
”
“
Ofcour
sey
oucar
e…”
“
NoIdon’
t!If
eel
sodeadi
nsi
demi
ght
aswel
ldi
e!!
”
“
Youdon’
tmeant
hatbut
y”
“
IdoZo,
Ican’
tli
vewi
thouther
,tel
lme
howam Isupposedt
obr
eat
hewi
thout
ai
r.
”It
akehi
shandi
ntomi
ne
“
Don’
tgi
veuponher
.Fi
ghtf
orher
pl
ease,
wecan’
tgi
veuponher
.Wehav
e
t
ofi
ghtbut
y”

I
t’
shur
tsdeepi
nmyhear
t,If
eel
li
ke
someonest
abbedakni
fei
nmyhear
t
andt
wist
edi
tov
erandov
ert
aki
ngaway
ev
erybi
tofst
rengt
hlef
twi
thi
nmeunt
ilI
coul
dn’
tbr
eat
he.I
’
vemadet
hehar
dest
deci
sionIhav
eev
erhadt
omakebuti
t
hadt
obedone.Imar
kev
erypi
ctur
eof
ust
oget
herasI
’
m aboutt
opr
essdel
ete
Si
bongi
l
escr
eams
“
Don’
t!
”Il
ookathert
hroughmygl
assy
ey
es,
shesi
tsnex
ttomeandt
akesmy
phonef
rom myhands.
“
Whydon’
tyouknockSi
bongi
l
e?”
“
Idi
dbuty
oudi
dn’
thearme”Iwi
pemy
t
ear
sandl
ookatheri
nant
ici
pat
ion.
“
IknowI
’
myoungandIdon’
tknow
muchaboutr
elat
ionshi
psbutIt
hinky
ou
ar
emov
ingt
oof
ast
.Taket
hingssl
owl
y
y
oudon’
thav
etodel
etey
ourmemor
ies
wi
thhi
m now,
cher
isht
hem asl
ongas
y
oucanunt
ily
ouar
ereadyt
olett
hem
go.Youar
ehur
ti
ngnowandi
t’
s
under
standabl
ebutt
oday
’shear
tache
won’
tbet
hesamenex
tweek,
may
be
y
ouwi
l
lreal
i
zet
haty
eshehur
tyoubut
y
oul
ovehi
m somucht
olethi
m go”
“
Ihav
ebeent
her
ebef
ore.St
ayi
ngi
na
r
elat
ionshi
pbecauseofl
ove,
thati
sand
i
tcost
edmesomuchpai
nSi
bongi
l
e.
Notonl
ydi
dIl
osemydaught
erf
or4
y
ear
s,Ial
sol
ostt
woofmybabi
esof
whi
chIwi
l
lnev
erknowwhatgender
t
heywer
eorhowt
heywoul
dhav
e
l
ookedl
i
ke.Theysayl
oveconquer
sal
l
butIbegt
odi
ff
er,
lov
eiswhatcaused
somuchpai
n.I
tmademehol
donev
en
whenIshoul
dhav
eletgot
hef
ir
stt
ime
hel
aidhi
shandonme.
”
“
I’
m sor
ryt
oheart
hatsi
sBonga,
Idon’
t
ev
enknowwhatt
osay
”
“
Idon’
twanty
out
ohol
dont
oa
r
elat
ionshi
pwher
elov
eist
heonl
ythi
ng
t
hati
sst
oppi
ngy
ouf
rom l
ett
inggo.
Loy
alt
y,honest
y,t
rustandr
espectar
e
t
hemosti
mpor
tantel
ement
sthatkeep
ar
elat
ionshi
pont
rack,
doy
ouhearme?
”
“
Ehsi
sibut
…”
“
Ther
e’snobut
..
.Wehav
etof
ini
sh
packi
ng.Mi
rai
sst
il
lsl
eepi
ngatt
his
t
ime?
”It
’sar
ound12pm.
Wear
efi
nal
l
yleav
ingf
orJoz
i
per
manent
lyi
ntwoday
s.Ican’
twai
tto
beawayf
rom t
hishouset
hati
sful
lof
badmemor
iest
hengood.Ican’
twai
tto
beawayf
rom Dur
banandbr
eat
he
di
ff
erentai
r.Changeofscener
yiswhatI
r
eal
l
yneed.
“
Yes”
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thher
?”
“
Wesl
eptl
atel
astni
ght
”Imakemyway
t
oherbedr
oom.
“
Mir
awakeup,
wehav
eal
otofpacki
ng
t
odobaby
”
“
I’
mti
redmama”Ipul
lof
fthecov
ers
f
rom herheadandl
ookather
,shel
ooks
hor
ri
bleandshe’
sbeencr
ying.
“
What
’swr
ongmyl
ove?
”Isi
tdownnex
t
t
oher
“
Not
hingmama”
“
Isi
tLwandl
elwenkosi
?”
“
NoI
’
mfi
ne”
“
Comeon,
youdi
dn’
tcomef
ordi
nner
l
astni
ght
.Iknowy
oupl
easet
alkt
o
mommy
”shebur
sti
ntot
ear
sandmy
hear
tsi
nks.Ipul
lheri
ntomyar
msand
comf
ort
sherasshesobsl
oudl
y.
“
Kwenz
enj
ani
Mir
a,Khul
umanami
”
(
what
’sgoi
ngonMi
rat
alkt
ome)
“
I’
m scar
edmama”
“
Ofwhat
?”shedoesn’
trepl
yandIdon’
t
di
ganyf
urt
her
,shewi
l
ltel
lmewhen
she’
scal
m down.
“
Don’
tcr
y,I
’
m her
e.Youhav
enot
hingt
o
bescar
edofy
ezwa”shenodsherhead.
“
Tal
ktome”Isayaf
tershecal
msdown
“
I’
mfi
nemama,
let
’sdot
hepacki
ng”
“
Mir
apl
ease,
howwi
l
lIhel
pyoui
fyou
don’
ttel
lme?
”
“
Ahhi
t’
sjustt
hatIwast
hinki
ngabout
howIwi
l
lmi
ssLwenkosi
whenhe’
sin
Amer
ica.I
’
m scar
edt
hatImi
ghtl
ose
hi
m”
“
Ohmybabyy
out
wohav
ebeent
hrough
al
ott
oget
her
,Idon’
tthi
nkt
housand
ki
l
omet
reswoul
dbeapr
obl
em.
”
“
Yout
hinkso?
”
“
Yesmysweet
hear
t,don’
twor
ryokay
”I
wi
pehert
ear
sonherf
aceandki
ssher
f
orehead
“
Thanky
oumommy
”
“
Youar
ewel
comemydar
li
ng”
“
CanIasky
ouaquest
ion?
”
“
Yes”
“
Woul
dyout
ell
someonesomet
hingt
hat
y
ouknowf
oraf
actt
hati
ftheycamet
o
knowabout
,theywoul
dsacr
if
icet
hei
r
br
ightf
utur
e?”
“
Mmm i
ftel
l
ingt
hem somet
hingwi
l
l
maket
hem sacr
if
icet
hei
rfut
uret
hen
t
hist
hingmustbeal
sov
eryi
mpor
tant
,
j
ustasmuchast
hei
rbr
ightf
utur
e”
“
Yeski
ndof
”
“
I’
dlett
hem makedeci
sionsf
or
t
hemsel
vessoy
esIwoul
dtel
lthem”
“
Don’
tyout
hinkt
heywi
l
lresenty
ouone
dayf
orbei
ngar
easont
heysacr
if
iced
t
hei
rbr
ightf
utur
e”
“
Ift
heywer
emeantt
ohav
eabr
ight
f
utur
etheywi
l
lonewayort
heot
her
.
May
bewhatawai
tsf
ort
hem i
sbi
gger
”
“
Mmm Isee.
..
thanky
ou”
“
Any
time.
..
nowgetup.Ther
e’sal
otof
packi
ngt
hatneedst
obedone”
“
Wher
e’sKamar
ia?
”
“
Lwandl
ewasher
eear
li
ert
ofet
chher
.
Fat
heranddaught
erbondi
ngday
”
“
Ohy
es”
“
Iseet
haty
ouar
ehappyt
hatKam Kam
hasn’
twar
medupt
oMpendul
o.”
“
Yesi
tser
veshi
mri
ght
,nex
tti
mehewi
l
l
wat
chwhatt
osayt
omydaught
er”I
gi
ggl
e.Ther
estoft
hedaywespendi
t
bypacki
ng.Myphonehasbeenr
ingi
ng
nonest
op,
it’
sKsoIdeci
dedt
o
swi
tchedi
tof
f.
“
SisBonga,
youhav
eadel
i
ver
y”Ir
oll
my
ey
escant
hismanj
ustst
opi
tal
ready
bat
hong.Hehasbeent
hrowi
nggi
ft
sat
me3t
imesadayf
ort
hepastt
woday
s,
whodoest
hat
?
“
Justsi
gnandt
akewhat
evert
hati
s”I
dol
astmi
nut
escheckagai
ntoseei
fwe
ar
enotl
eav
ingany
thi
ngbehi
nd.
Si
bongi
l
ecomesbackwi
thf
lower
sand
agi
ftbag.
“
Wher
e’sMi
raweshoul
dgetgoi
ngnow”
“
Sti
l
lsay
ingbomagoodby
ekucuddl
e
cakesout
side….
arey
ousur
eyounot
ev
engoi
ngt
oaskwhat
’sal
lthi
s”
“
Ify
oudon’
twantt
hesesayso,
Iwi
l
l
gi
vet
hem t
oMi
ra”
“
Butsi
sBongahe’
str
ying”
“
Nohe’
sbuy
ingmyf
orgi
veness”
“
Goshy
ouar
edi
ff
icul
tsomewomenwi
l
l
behappyf
orsuchgest
ures.Lookat
t
hesedi
amondear
ri
ngst
heymusthav
e
costhi
m anar
m andal
eg.
”Il
ookat
t
hem andr
emembert
hedayt
heycaught
myat
tent
ioni
nacat
alogue,
Idi
dn’
tthi
nk
hewaspay
ingat
tent
ion.
“
Letmekeept
hechocol
atesand
f
lower
s,y
ouwi
l
lkeept
heear
ri
ngsand
t
hecar
d”
“
Okay
”It
aket
heboxofear
ri
ngsandt
he
car
dthathasal
ongmessage.Ineed
t
imet
oreadt
his.Ev
ery
thi
ngi
ssetand
wel
eav
ingnonebehi
ndsowear
egood
t
ogo.
“
Snookums”myhear
tski
psabeatatt
he
soundofhi
svoi
ce.It
urnar
oundand
l
ookathi
m.Hel
ooksl
i
kehehasaged
10y
ear
swi
thi
n2day
sandhi
sey
esar
e
r
ed.
“
Khuz
ani
”Hel
i
mpshi
swaycl
oserandI
canseet
hathest
il
lnotusedoft
he
cr
utches.Thewhi
ffofhi
sheav
enl
y
scenti
sint
oxi
cat
ing.West
areateach
ot
herdeepi
ntheey
es.
“
I’
m sor
ry…”
“
Iknow”
“
WhatIdi
disunf
orgi
vabl
ebutpl
ease
gi
vemeonel
astchanceIbegy
ou
maMt
himkhul
u”
“
I’
m sor
ry,
Ican’
tKandIneedt
ogo”
“
Bongawhatdoy
ouwantmet
odot
o
showy
out
hatI
’
m sor
ry?Tel
lmemy
j
aan,
Iwi
l
lgl
adl
ydoi
tpl
ease.I
’
m
suf
focat
ingwi
thouty
ouIneedy
ou
baby
”
“
Iwanty
out
oleav
emeal
oneandl
etme
be,
cany
oudot
hatf
orme”Heshakes
hi
sheadnoandget
scl
oser
.Ist
epback
abi
tIdon’
twanthi
mtobecl
ose,
he’
s
maki
ngmeweak.
“
Ilov
eyouandIwon’
tgi
veupony
ou,
notnow,
notev
er.Iwi
l
lbeanui
sance
unt
ily
out
akemeback”Hepl
aceshi
s
handonmyneckandpul
l
smecl
osert
o
hi
m.Wear
enoset
onoseandbr
eat
hing
t
hesameai
r.Myey
esi
nvol
unt
ari
l
ycl
ose
ashenear
scl
oserf
ort
heki
ssbuthe
doesn’
tki
ssme
“
Trav
elsaf
e”Iopenmyey
esandf
ind
hi
m wal
ki
ngawaywi
thmyhear
t.
“
Dragongr
annyasambephel
a!”(
Let
’s
go)mygr
anddaught
ersnapsmeoutof
i
t.Thi
sisi
t,l
et’
sseewhatJohannesbur
g
hasi
nst
oref
orme.

“
Thanky
ousomuchi
twasni
cedoi
ng
busi
nesswi
thy
ou”Hesmi
l
esandwal
ks
outl
eav
ingmecount
ingmymoney
.Li
fe
i
sroughandIhav
edeci
dedt
osel
lmost
oft
heel
ect
ri
cappl
i
ancest
hrough
gumt
reet
ohav
emoneywhi
l
stI
’
m st
il
l
j
obhaunt
ing.Ineedt
odosome
gr
ocer
iesandbuysomef
ewcl
othes.My
l
i
fehasi
mmensel
ychangedwi
thi
na
bl
i
nkofaney
eandt
her
e’snot
hingIcan
dobutacceptt
hingsast
heyar
eand
hopet
hatt
hingswi
l
lgetbet
ter
.Ican’
t
af
for
dtost
ressmyki
ds.I
’
m goi
ngt
odo
what
everi
ttakest
onotst
resst
hem and
hav
eaheal
thypr
egnancy
.Ther
e’sa
knockonmydoorandI
’
m wonder
ing
whot
hatmi
ghtbeort
heguyt
hat
boughtmypl
asmat
vfor
gotsomet
hing.
Ishuf
fl
emyf
eett
owar
dst
hedoorand
openi
t.
“
Hel
l
ohowcanIhel
pyou”Isayt
othi
s
t
hickwomanwhol
ooksl
i
keshe’
sinher
mi
ddl
efi
ft
ies.
“
Whoar
eyout
oaskmet
hat
?Iwantmy
daught
er.Wher
e’sKhosi
”shepushesi
n
al
mostcausi
ngmet
ofal
l
.Wai
tcoul
d
t
hisbeKhosi
’
smom?Howdi
dshef
ind
her
?”
“
Khosi
!.
..
Khosi
!.
..
K­hosi
!”Shescr
eams,
asshesear
chf
orKhosi
.Idon’
thav
e
ener
gyf
orhersoIwai
tforhert
ofi
nish
hersear
chi
ng.
“
Wher
e’smydaught
er?
”
“
Int
hedumpst
erwher
eyoudumped
her
”shel
aughs
“
Yeywenant
ombaz
aneI
’
m nott
hat
usel
essbi
tchofawoman.I
’
m her
mot
herwhof
oundherandt
ookheras
mi
ne”oht
heonet
hatabusedher
.
“
Isee.
..
Khosi
lef
ttwoweeksbackMama.
It
houghtshet
oldy
out
hatshe’
sgoi
ng
away
.Idon’
tknowf
orhowl
ongbuti
t’
s
seemsl
i
kef
orgood”
“
Shel
eftandwentwher
e?”Icansee
shocki
nherey
es
“
Idon’
tknowshedi
dn’
tsay
,shej
ustl
eft
met
hishouseandl
eft
.Sheev
en
r
esi
gnedatt
hehospi
tal
”
“
Thatungr
atef
ulbi
tch!Af
terev
ery
thi
ngI
hav
edonef
orhershel
eftusj
ustl
i
ke
t
hat
!Nogoodby
enomoney
,not
hing!
”I
saynot
hing,
itwast
imeshet
hought
abouther
sel
fonl
y.
“
Whoar
eyou?
”
“
I’
m herf
ri
end”
“
Lal
elakef
ri
endndi
nipacky
ourbags
andl
eav
e!Thi
sismyhousenow!
”
“
Mamay
oucan’
tdot
hatshegav
eme
t
hishouse!
”
“
Yeywenadoy
out
hinkIcar
e!Hambal
a
manj
e!!
!!
”JustwhenIt
houghtatl
eastI
hav
eahouset
hent
hiswomancomes,
mydearl
ordIknowIhav
esi
nnedbut
t
hisi
stoomuchnowpl
easehav
emer
cy
onme.

Themor
eIt
hinkaboutt
hispr
egnancyi
s
t
hemor
eIdon’
twantt
hischi
l
d.I
’
m so
scar
edofgoi
ngt
hrought
hesamepai
n
agai
nandInev
ert
houghtIwoul
dev
er
hav
etocar
ryanot
hersoul
inmyt
ummy
buther
ewear
e.I
t’
sbeenaweeksi
nce
wemov
edt
oJohannesbur
g,av
erybusy
weeki
fImustsay
.Imadepubl
i
c
st
atementaboutgai
ningmysi
ght4
day
sbackandhad3gi
gsr
espect
ivel
y
I
’
m st
il
lex
haust
edandt
hispr
egnancyi
s
notdoi
ngmeanyj
ust
ice,
Ijustwantt
o
r
est
.Ihav
en’
ttol
dmom norLwenkosi
aboutmypr
egnancyandt
odaymy
cuddl
ecakesi
sleav
ingf
orAmer
icabut
wear
egoi
ngt
ospendf
ewhour
s
t
oget
her
.Lor
dknowshowl
ongIhav
e
beendr
aggi
ngt
hisday
.I’
m notr
eadyt
o
saygoodby
etohi
m.Si
bongi
l
ehasbeen
naggi
ngmeaboutt
ell
i
ngLwenkosi
aboutt
hepr
egnancy
.
“
Whaty
ouar
edoi
ngi
sunf
airMi
ra.
”
“
Idon’
twanthi
mtor
esentmeormy
babyi
nal
ongr
unbecausewer
obbed
hi
m achancet
ofl
our
ishi
nhi
scar
eer
.”
“
Doest
hismeansy
ouwi
l
lkeept
he
baby
?”
“
Inev
ersai
dIwi
l
labor
tit
,cany
ou
pl
easest
opt
alki
ngaboutt
hisbecause
mom wi
l
lheary
ou.
”Iwal
koutbef
ore
shesay
sany
thi
ngLeei
swai
ti
ngf
orme.
Sboshcanr
eal
l
ybeanui
sance.If
indmy
t
wof
avour
it
egi
rl
sbaki
ngi
ntheki
tchen.
“
I’
m of
fbutcanIhav
etwocakes”
“
Nomommywear
enotf
ini
shed”
“
Ithoughtt
odayy
ouar
enotgoi
ngt
o
st
udi
o,whati
sLeedoi
ngher
e?”Ipee
t
hrought
hewi
ndowandseeLee’
scar
par
kednex
ttouncl
eK’
s
“
Mom f
orgi
vet
hemanpl
ease,
sekuy
azwel
amanj
e.”Hehasbeen
campi
ngher
eforaweek,
singi
ngl
ove
songsandsendi
nggi
ft
slef
tri
ghtand
cent
re.
“
Youdi
dn’
tanswermyquest
ion”
“
I’
m meet
ingupwi
tht
hisgi
rlwhowant
t
owr
it
eabookaboutme.Mom pl
ease
f
orgi
veuncl
eK,
don’
tyoumi
sshi
m?”
“
Idoev
erysi
ngl
esecondbutnoI
’
m not
t
aki
nghi
m back.Heneedst
ogett
hat
t
hroughhi
sthi
ckskul
l
”Isi
gh
“
I’
m of
f”
“
Pleasemakesur
eyoueatsomet
hingI
don’
twanty
oust
arv
ingmygr
andchi
l
d”I
st
opr
ightonmyt
racksasmyhear
t
ski
psabeat
.Howdoessheknow?
Sbosht
hatasshol
e!
“
Whatdi
dyousay
?”
“
Youhear
dme”
“
How.
..
uhm.
.Si
bongi
l
­e.
.tol
d..y
ou?
”I
st
utt
er,
I’
m shaki
ngi
nfearandIknow
whatwi
l
lfol
l
owaf
tert
his,
ahugesl
apor
ev
enmor
esoIbr
acemy
sel
fup
“
Noshedi
dn’
ttel
lme,
Icanseey
ou”
“
Ngi
yax
oli
samama”I
’
mint
ear
snow
“
Gowewi
l
ltal
kwheny
oucomeback”
whyshe’
ssocal
m aboutt
hisorshe’
s
sav
ingangerf
orl
ater
.Iwi
pemyt
ear
s
andwal
kout
.Igr
eetUncl
eKf
ir
st
“
Unj
ani
maf
ungwasewami
”
“
I’
m gooduncl
eK,
got
oahot
elandhav
e
ar
estpl
easey
oucan’
tbest
rai
ning
y
our
sel
fli
ket
his.Youj
ustgotoutof
comat
woweeksback”
“
Okay
”Iknowt
hathe’
sjustagr
eei
ngf
or
t
hef
unofi
t,Ial
way
stel
lhi
mthi
s
ev
ery
daybuthenev
erl
i
stens.
“
Howi
sshe?
”
“
Shemi
ssesy
ou”Hesmi
l
es
“
Real
l
y?Imi
sshert
oo,
doy
out
hinkshe
wi
l
lev
erf
orgi
veme?
”
“
Idon’
tknow,
I’
m sor
ry”
“
It
’sokaybutIwon’
tgi
veuponher
”Lee
hoot
sIki
ssuncl
eK’
scheekandj
ogt
o
Lee’
scar
.
“
Youl
i
kekeepi
ngmewai
ti
ngMi
racl
e”
“
I’
m sor
ry”wedr
iveof
f
“
Sodoy
ouknowt
hisgi
rl
?”
“
NoIdon’
t”
“
Whatmadey
out
oconsi
derherof
fer
?”
“
Ilov
edherappr
oached,
somat
ureand
i
mpr
essi
ve.
”Wear
ri
veatt
heagr
eed
r
est
aur
antandLeescansherey
es
ar
ound.
“
Ther
eshei
sbyt
hecor
ner
”wewal
kto
herandShe’
sabeaut
if
ulshor
tthi
ckgi
rl
wi
thf
ull
thi
ckl
i
ps.
Weshar
epl
easant
ri
esandi
ntr
oduct
ion
t
hensi
tdown.
“
Iwoul
dli
ket
othanky
oubot
hforgi
vi
ng
mef
ewmi
nut
esoft
imet
ocomeupand
meetme”shesay
s,sheseemsl
i
kea
downear
thper
sonandv
eryshy
.
“
MissZi
kode…”
shecut
smeshor
t
“
Pleasecal
lmeThembel
i
hleorLi
hle”
“
Lihl
ear
eyouanaut
hor
”
“
No”
“
Sohowcany
ouwr
it
eabookaboutme
i
fyouar
enotanaut
hor
?”
“
Wel
lIwoul
dn’
tdescr
ibemy
sel
fasan
aut
horbutwr
it
ingi
smypassi
on.Ihav
e
wr
it
ten6st
ori
esonFacebookandy
ou
canev
enf
indt
hem onv
isi
onar
ywr
it
ing.
”
“
Thatmeansy
ouar
eanaut
hormos,
you
hav
ewr
it
tenst
ori
esbef
ore”sheshr
ugs
hershoul
der
s.Il
ookatherandnot
ice
somet
hingi
nherey
es.
“
Ify
oudon’
tbel
i
evei
nyourcr
aftt
hen
howdoy
ouex
pectot
herpeopl
eto
bel
i
evei
nit
?Li
hlei
tshoul
dst
artwi
th
y
ouf
ir
st.Il
ovey
ourbr
aver
yfor
appr
oachi
ngmebutI
’
m di
sappoi
ntedi
n
y
ourat
ti
tude.Howdoy
ouex
pectmet
o
t
ell
yout
hest
oryofmyl
i
feandbel
i
eve
t
haty
ouwi
l
lmaket
hebestoutofi
tif
y
oul
ackconf
idence”shebi
teherl
ower
l
i
p
“
I’
m sor
ryaboutt
hat
,I’
mjustner
vous
t
hat
’sal
l
.Idobel
i
evei
nmycr
aft
”I
chuckl
ebecauseIcanseer
ightt
hrough
her
.
“
Tel
lmewhydoy
ouwantt
owr
it
eabout
me?
”
“
Fir
stofal
lyouar
emyr
olemodel
.Il
ove
y
ousomuch,
youi
nspi
reme.Secondl
y
i
t’
sver
yrar
ethatwer
eadaboutpeopl
e
whohav
ecer
tai
ndi
sabi
l
iti
es.I
’
m
i
ntr
iguedonhowi
t’
sli
ket
oli
vewi
th
bl
i
ndness.Youknowt
her
ear
eal
otof
super
sti
ti
onsandmy
thsaboutbl
i
nd
peopl
esoIwanty
out
ogi
veusacl
ear
pi
ctur
eaboutl
i
feofabl
i
ndper
son.Last
butnotl
easthowwasl
i
keseei
ngf
ort
he
f
ir
stt
imei
nyourl
i
fe?
”Thi
sti
meshe
speaksconf
ident
lyIguesst
hener
ves
haseasedup
“
Mmm Isee.
..
howol
dyouar
eyou?
”
“
Tur
ning24t
hisy
ear
”
“
Alr
ightThembel
i
hleI
’
m goi
ngt
ogi
ve
y
oumyst
oryandt
rusty
out
omaket
he
bestoutofi
t.
”
“
Real
l
y?”Shegasps
“
Yes”
“
Youdon’
tmi
ndt
hatI
’
m notapubl
i
shed
aut
hor
?”
“
NoIhav
efai
thi
nyou.It
hinky
oushoul
d
gi
vemet
hel
i
stofy
ourst
ori
esIwantt
o
r
eadt
hem”
“
OhmyGodt
hanky
ousomuchI
pr
omi
set
odomybest
!Thel
i
sti
sIwi
sh
Iknewt
henwhatIknownow…”
“
Woah,
breat
hef
ir
st”shegi
ggl
es
“
I’
mjusthappyt
hanky
ouMi
ss
Mt
himkhul
ufort
hisoppor
tuni
ty.Thi
s
woul
dbemyf
ir
stpubl
i
shedbookand
I
…”Shebl
i
nkhert
ear
sbackandsmi
l
e
“
Ngi
yabongakakhul
u”
“
Nami
ngi
yabongapl
easecal
lmeMi
ra”
shenodssof
tl
y
“
OkayI
’
m hungr
ypeopl
elet
’sor
der
”Isay
cal
l
ingt
hewai
tert
obr
ingt
hemenu.
Af
terbr
unchwi
thmyf
anandmy
managerofwhi
chwasl
ovel
y,Leedr
ives
mebackt
otheapar
tment
.
“
Wher
ear
eyounow?
”
“
I’
m onmywaybaby
”
“
Youhav
ebeensay
ingt
hatf
oranhour
Lwenkosi
!Nowwear
egoi
ngt
ospenda
l
i
ttl
eti
met
oget
her
”
“
I’
m al
mostt
her
emyl
ove”Idi
dn’
tfi
nd
any
onewhenIgethomeI
’
m sur
ethey
wentt
ovi
sitmom Dudu.I
t’
s3pm when
t
hisboy
fri
endofmi
near
ri
vesandhi
s
f
li
ghti
sboar
dingat5pm t
hat
’smeans
wegott
wohour
stoget
her
.I’
m so
pi
ssedl
i
kehel
l
.
“
Ukubaushi
l
oLwenkosi
ukut
hiy
oudon’
t
wantt
ospendt
imewi
thmebef
orey
ou
go”(
youshoul
dhav
ejustsai
dthat
…)
“
Hel
l
omyl
ove”Ipushhi
m butenv
elopes
mei
nhi
sar
msandgi
vesmeabr
eat
h
t
aki
ngki
sst
hatl
eav
esmehor
nyi
nan
i
nst
ant
.
“
I’
m sor
ry”hesay
slooki
ngi
ntomyey
es
af
tert
heki
ss
“
It
’sokay
”Iwhi
sperhemakesmeso
weak.
“
Youl
ooksmashi
ng”
“
Thanky
oumyl
ove.
..
let
’sgo”
“
Dowehav
etowast
etheset
wohour
s
bygoi
ngwher
every
ousaywhenwe
shoul
dwebef
ucki
ng?Ther
e’snoone
her
e”
“
Nobabywhati
ftheycomeback”
“
Wewi
l
lbequi
cknj
e,Imi
ssy
ouBab
Nkosi
andt
het
houghtofy
ougoi
ng
awayf
ormont
hsi
t’
ski
l
li
ngmebutIwi
l
l
best
rong”
“
Youwon’
tev
ennot
iceI
’
m nother
e
st
handwasami
.Iwi
l
lcal
landSky
pey
ou
ev
ery
day
”
Hescoopsmeupandwal
ksoutwi
thme.
“
Wher
ear
eyout
aki
ngmet
o”
“
Towat
chamov
ie”
“
HawuLwenkosi
,Ir
atherspendt
hese
t
wohour
sfucki
ngy
out
hanwat
chi
nga
mov
ie.
”
“
Ouchy
ouar
ebr
eaki
ngmyhear
tnow”
“
Butbabywehav
ebeenwat
chi
ng
mov
iesf
orev
er”
“
Yougoi
ngt
olov
ethi
sone”Ir
oll
my
ey
es,
Ihav
eadapt
edmom and
Kamar
ia’
sey
erol
l
ingt
endency
.Het
akes
myhandaswemakeourwayi
n.He
doesn’
tev
enbuypopcor
nanddr
inks
mx
m!I
t’
sseemsl
i
kewear
eear
ly
becausei
t’
sempt
yormay
bepeopl
ear
e
ont
hei
rway
.Wesi
tont
hef
rontr
owas
perhi
sdemand,
fewsecondsl
ater
peopl
est
artget
ti
ngi
n.Idon’
tev
en
bot
herl
ooki
ngatt
hem.
“
Cany
ouatl
eastpr
etendt
obehappy
bei
ngwi
thme?
”If
akeasmi
l
eandki
ss
hi
scheek.
“
I’
m happybaby
”secondsl
atert
he
mov
iest
art
spl
ayi
ng.If
ocusont
he
scr
eenandseepi
ctur
esofLwenkosi
andIpl
ayi
ngi
nasl
i
deshowwhi
l
e
Thi
nki
ngoutl
oudbyEdSheer
anpl
ayi
ng
i
nthebackgr
ound.Il
ookathi
m andhe
smi
l
esatme.Fr
om t
hedaywemeti
na
r
est
aur
antwher
ehewasr
udet
ome,
ina
par
kwhenhemademepl
ayaswi
ngf
or
t
hef
ir
stt
ime,
thedayIspentmyf
ir
st
dayathi
shouseandt
hef
oll
owi
ngday
het
ookmef
orbr
eakf
ast
,thedaywe
wentt
othest
udi
oandwesangf
oreach
ot
herandshar
edourf
ir
stki
ssandso
andsoont
il
ltoday
“
Babywhat
’sgoi
ngon”Don’
ttel
lmet
hat
t
hesepeopl
ear
eher
etowat
chour
memor
ies.It
urnar
oundt
olookat
peopl
ebehi
ndmeandt
hef
ir
stper
sonI
seei
smydaught
ernex
ttomymom.
Theywav
eatme,
myey
est
rav
elf
rom
t
hem t
oSbosht
hengogoandmkhul
u
hai
bokwenz
akal
ani
la.Mymom’
s
si
bli
ngswi
tht
hei
rchi
l
drenev
enAy
anda
i
sher
e.Mom Zowi
thherhusbandand
daught
er.Uncl
eKwi
thhi
sdaught
er
ev
ery
onei
sher
eguy
s!Igetupf
rom my
seat
“
What
’sgoi
ngonher
eist
hissome
f
ami
l
ymov
ieorsomet
hing”Theydon’
t
sayany
thi
ngbutl
ookatmewi
thsmi
l
es
ont
hei
rfaces.It
urnt
olookatmy
cuddl
escakeshe’
sonhi
skneesont
he
seatcar
ryi
ngabeaut
if
ulr
edr
ose.
“
MaShwabadapeopl
efal
li
nlov
ein
my
ster
iousway
s.Inev
ert
houghtone
dayIwi
l
lbeher
einf
rontofy
ouandour
f
ami
l
ydecl
ari
ngmyl
ovef
ory
ou.Inev
er
t
houghtt
heactwi
l
ltur
nouti
nto
somet
hingsor
eal
andbeaut
if
ul.That
’s
y
ouandmet
oget
hermyl
ove,
wehav
e
beent
hroughal
ott
oget
herbuther
ewe
ar
est
il
lsur
viv
ing.Wear
ebl
essed
becauseweshar
etheki
ndofl
oveand
r
elat
ionshi
pmi
l
li
onsofcoupl
esi
nthi
s
pl
anetcr
avef
or.Youar
emyuni
ver
se,
myheav
en,
mypar
adi
se.Myl
ovef
ory
ou
i
sanessenceofev
eryf
ibr
eofmybei
ng.
Iwantt
ospendev
erysi
ngl
emomentof
t
her
estofmyl
i
febyy
ou.Thanky
ouso
muchf
ort
hepr
eci
ousgi
fty
ouar
e
car
ryi
ngandt
hanky
ouf
orour
moonl
i
ght
.Ipr
omi
sey
out
hatIwi
l
l
f
orev
erbeher
etosuppor
tyou.Iknow
t
haty
ouwantt
hebestf
ormeandI
’
m
gr
atef
ulf
ort
hatmyl
ovebutwear
ein
t
hist
oget
her
.Don’
tbeaf
rai
dI’
m her
efor
y
ouandI
’
m goi
ngt
ospoi
lyour
ott
en
j
ubal
ami
.”Thesebl
oodyt
ear
sdon’
t
wantt
ost
opf
all
i
ng,
I’
m sni
ff
ingnone
st
op.
“
Howdi
dyouknow?
”
“
Kamar
iaaskedmewhati
spr
egnant
andIt
oldheri
t’
sapr
ocessofbuy
inga
babyandshesai
dyouwer
ecr
ying
becausey
oudon’
twantt
obuyababy
t
henIr
eal
i
zehowi
mpossi
bley
ouhav
e
beenl
atel
y,t
hechi
ckenf
eetandmaas
cr
avi
ngs.Si
bongi
l
econf
ir
medi
t.
”Thi
s
chi
l
d!
“
Idon’
twanty
out
osacr
if
icey
our
dr
eamsf
orus.Pl
easegot
oAmer
ica
andshowt
hem whaty
ouar
emadeof
,
y
ouwi
l
lfi
nduswai
ti
ngf
ory
ou”
“
Iwoul
drat
herbeher
ethangot
her
e.I
won’
tleav
eyout
odeal
wit
hthe
pr
egnancyal
one,
Iwantt
obeher
eev
ery
st
epoft
hewayandIdon’
twantt
omi
ss
any
thi
ng.
”Inodwi
thmyheadandhe
openst
her
edr
oset
her
ingspar
klesi
n
myey
es.Hi
sey
esl
ookont
hescr
eenI
seebi
gwor
dswr
it
ten‘
Wil
lYouMar
ry
Me’
“
Makemet
hehappi
estmani
nthi
s
wor
ldandmar
rymeMi
raMt
himkhul
u”I
l
ookatmymom andshesmi
l
esatme
wi
tht
ear
sinherey
es.
“
Yes.
..
yesIwi
l
lmar
ryy
ou”Hesl
i
dest
he
r
ingonmyf
ingerandbef
oreki
ssi
ngt
he
l
i
vingshi
toutofme.Thet
heat
reer
upt
wi
thscr
eamsofj
oy
“
Sav
esomef
orl
aterbo!
”Sboshsay
s
andwegi
ggl
ebr
eaki
ngt
heki
ss.
“
Ilov
eyousomuch”Isay
“
Ilov
eyout
oo,
nowl
et’
sgot
oour
engagementpar
ty.Iev
enaskedt
hem t
o
pr
epar
eper
iper
ichi
ckenf
eetory
ou
wantmaas”
“
Hai
bowhoeatmaasatt
hei
r
engagementpar
ty”Wel
augh.WowI
di
dn’
tseet
hiscomi
ngI
’
m soov
ert
he
moonbutIneedt
odeal
nal
omamgobhoz
iowuKamar
iaf
ir
st.
CHAPTER74

Ihav
enev
erf
eltt
hiswayi
nasl
ongasI
canr
emember
.I’
mlossf
orwor
ds,
Ican’
t
ex
presshowhappyIam i
nthi
smoment
.
Inev
ert
houghtIwoul
dbesomeone’
s
f
iancéeatt
heageof23,
inf
actInev
er
t
houghtIcoul
dev
erf
indl
oveori
sitl
ove
t
hatf
oundme?Myl
i
fe’
sjour
neyhas
t
aughtmet
hataper
fectr
elat
ionshi
pis
not
hingl
i
keaf
air
ytal
eort
her
eisno
l
i
vinghappi
l
yev
eraf
terl
i
keal
lfai
ryt
ale
endi
ngs.Ev
eryr
elat
ionshi
pgoes
t
hroughups,
downs,
fight
s,ar
gument
s
andi
rr
it
abl
ephasesbutt
hecompat
ibl
e
coupl
ehav
eamaz
ingunder
standi
ngf
or
eachot
her
’sl
evel
oft
oler
anceand
pat
ience.Theyendur
eeachot
her
’s
i
mper
fect
ionsandcher
isheachot
her
’s
di
ff
erence.Theynev
ergi
veuponeach
ot
herev
ent
hought
heyhav
eputeach
ot
hert
hroughhel
l
.Theysur
render
t
hemsel
vest
oeachot
herandbecome
eachot
her
’ssour
ceofhappi
ness.Idon’
t
wantt
obr
agbutt
hat
’st
heki
ndofa
r
elat
ionshi
pmyf
iancéandIshar
e,a
per
fectr
elat
ionshi
pthati
s.

Ishar
ehugsandki
sseswi
tht
hewhol
e
f
ami
l
yandt
heycongr
atul
ateme.
“
Uphi
lomf
anangi
zomdonsangendl
ebe”
(
wher
e’st
hatboyIwantt
owar
nhi
m)
mkhul
usay
swhohasact
ual
l
yputmeon
hi
slap.
“
I’
m her
emkhul
u”Lwenkosi
say
s
ner
vousl
y
“
Lal
elamf
anawami
ukenj
eumz
wise
ubuhl
unguuMi
miwami
ngi
zoki
nyauf
e
f
ii
i”(
List
enboyi
fyoudar
ehur
tmyMi
mi
Iwoul
dst
rangl
eyout
odeat
h)
“
AndIwi
l
lhel
pyoudadt
othr
owhi
s
bodyi
nther
iversot
hathewi
l
lbeeat
en
bycr
ocodi
l
es.Iknowy
ounev
erknew
t
hatMi
rahasanuncl
ebutI
’
m gl
adnow
y
ouknowandI
’
m heroneandonl
yuncl
e
whowi
l
ldoany
thi
ngf
orher
,ev
enki
l
li
ng
anasshol
ewhobr
eaksher
”Mal
ume
Thembi
nkosi
say
sandIcanseet
hathe
meantev
erywor
dandt
hatmomentmy
babyi
sshaki
ng.Ihopehedoesn’
tpee
hi
msel
fshame
“
Aqueendeser
vedt
obet
reat
edwi
th
car
e,l
oveandr
espectal
lthet
imeso
wor
rynotmyel
der
sbecauset
hat
’show
Iwi
l
ltr
eaty
ourgr
anddaught
er,
li
kea
queent
hatshei
s”Ican’
thel
pbutsmi
l
e.
“
Goodt
oheart
hat
”Theyshakehands
t
henIaskf
oranex
cuse.I
’
m sav
inghi
m
f
rom t
heset
womal
efi
gur
esi
nmyl
i
fe
whowoul
ddowhat
everi
ttakest
ocov
er
upt
het
imet
heyl
ostwi
thme.The
Mt
himkhul
usar
eahugef
ami
l
yof
most
lyf
emal
es.Mal
umeThembi
nkosi
andMkhul
uar
etheonl
ymal
es.
“
Youruncl
eisscar
ybaby
”Igi
ggl
e
“
He’
scool
oncey
ougetusedt
ohi
m,t
he
t
hingi
shei
sver
ypr
otect
iveofhi
s
f
ami
l
yaf
teral
lhe’
stheonl
ymal
eoutof
mkhul
u’
schi
l
dren”
“
Isee”
“
CanIst
eal
herf
oramoment
,att
he
par
tyshewi
l
lbeal
lyour
s”mom say
sto
Lwenkosi
who’
shol
dingmel
i
keIwoul
d
r
unawayf
rom hi
m.
“
That
’sokaymom Bonga”mom t
akes
myhandandwewal
ktohercar
,okay
I
’
m scar
edofmom’
sreact
ionr
egar
ding
t
hepr
egnancyandt
heengagement
.
Whati
fshe’
sdi
sappoi
ntmenti
nme,
whati
fshedi
sappr
ovesofmymar
ri
age?
“
Rel
axIwon’
tbi
tey
ou”Ohwi
thy
ou
womanonecan’
tbesosur
e.Si
bongi
l
e
i
stheonedr
ivi
ngnowaswear
eheadi
ng
t
otheengagementpar
tyv
enue.
“
Wher
e’sKam Kam”
“
Youknowhowshe’
sli
kewhenshesee
SnoandEmi
hle”shet
akesmyhands
i
ntoher
sandwel
ookateachot
her
.Her
ey
esar
etwi
nkl
i
ngwi
tht
ear
s
“
I’
m sor
rymamaf
orf
all
i
ngpr
egnantI
…”
“
Cany
oul
etmet
alkchi
l
d!”Igi
ggl
e
“
I’
m sor
ry”
“
Wel
lyesIwasex
pect
ingy
out
ofal
l
pr
egnantatal
aterst
agebutI
’
m happy
t
hatI
’
m goi
ngt
obepar
toft
his
pr
egnancyev
eryst
epoft
heway
.Iknow
t
haty
ouhav
etokobani
bani
buty
ou
hav
emysuppor
tnow,
youhav
eal
lof
oursuppor
tandwewi
l
lensur
ethaty
ou
hav
ethebestpr
egnancyev
er.
”Gosh
t
hishor
mones,
I’
m acr
yingmess
“
Don’
tcr
ywear
eint
hist
oget
hermy
baby
.Inev
erwant
edy
out
oex
per
ience
t
raumat
icpr
egnancyl
i
keme.I
’
m sor
ry
t
hatIwasn’
tther
efory
ouandKamar
ia
butwi
tht
hisone,
Iwi
l
lensur
eyouar
e
spoi
l
edr
ott
en”ncooohi
sn’
tshet
hebest
baki
thi
“
Ohmommyy
ouar
ethebestmot
her
ev
er,
thanky
ousomuchmt
akagogo”I
ki
ssherl
i
ps
“
Youknowt
hatmar
ri
agei
snoteasymy
l
ovesobef
orewegoanyf
urt
herar
eyou
r
eadyf
orev
ery
thi
ngt
hatcomeswi
th
mar
ri
age”
“
Imaynotknowev
ery
thi
ngt
hatcomes
wi
thmar
ri
agebutI
’
mreadyt
oembar
k
ont
hisj
our
neywi
thLwenkosi
mama.
”
“
OhbabyI
’
m sopr
oudofy
ou.
..
myf
ir
st
mar
ri
agef
ail
edbutwhenev
ery
ouneed
anyadv
iceI
’
m her
efory
ouokay
”Inod
asmor
etear
sfl
owf
reel
yonmycheeks
“
Stopcr
yingandl
et’
sgocel
ebr
atet
he
newbegi
nni
ngofy
ourl
i
feassomeone’
s
f
iancéehopef
ull
ysoont
obesomeone’
s
wi
fe”shewi
pesmyt
ear
sandweshar
ea
war
m hug
“
Youguy
sar
emaki
ngmecr
ynow”
Si
bongi
l
esay
s
“
Wenasf
ebey
ouwer
emaki
ngmeaf
ool
,
busynaggi
ngmet
otel
lLwenkosi
about
t
hepr
egnancywheny
ouknewhe
al
readyknow”shegi
ggl
es
“
Ipl
ayedmypar
twel
lneh”
“
Fusegsunakho”wel
augh
“
ButIdi
dn’
tsayany
thi
ngKamar
ia
sni
tchedony
ou,
minaIj
ustconf
ir
med
i
t”
“
Wuuul
oyongi
saz
omncwebai
mbi
mbi
ay
ekeukugobhoz
a”(
I’
m goi
ngt
opi
nch
t
hatoneonherpussysot
hatshecan
st
opsni
tchi
ng)t
heybot
hlaugh
“
Awuy
ekeumz
ukul
uwami
tshi
n”(
Leav
e
mygr
anddaught
eral
one)t
hemoment
wear
ri
veLwenkosi
fet
chesmeandwe
al
lmakeourwayi
n.
“
Wow!
”Ihav
enev
erbeent
oheav
enbut
mant
hisi
sit
,Il
ovet
hecombi
nat
ionof
myf
avour
it
ecol
ors,
blackandy
ell
ow,
t
hati
s,t
her
e’sal
sot
ouchofwhi
teher
e
andt
her
e.
“
Youout
doney
our
sel
fMrNkosi
”
“
I’
dli
ket
otaket
hecr
edi
tbutmom di
d
al
loft
his”
“
Thi
sisbeaut
if
ulbaby
.Il
ovei
t”
“
Come”Hescoopsmeup
“
YouknowIcanwal
kri
ght
”Isay
wr
appi
ngmyar
msar
oundhi
sneckas
hewal
kst
othef
rontwi
thme.
“
Itol
dyouIwi
l
lspoi
lyour
ott
en”He
pl
acesmeonourhear
tshapedbl
ack
couch.Ev
ery
onei
sal
readyseat
edi
n
t
hei
rtabl
es.Ther
e’saPi
anoman,
who’
s
pl
ayi
ngasof
tkey
.Sbohwal
kst
ohi
m
andaskf
orami
c.
“
Goodev
eni
ngev
ery
one”wegr
eether
back
“
I’
m Sbongi
l
eMt
himkhul
uI’
m goi
ngt
o
bet
heMCf
orCuddl
eCakes&Dol
l
face’
s
engagementpar
ty.I
’
dwoul
dli
ket
o
wel
comeeachandev
ery
oneofy
out
o
t
hecel
ebr
ati
onoft
heset
wol
over
s’
engagementpar
ty.
”ther
oom er
upt
s
wi
thj
oy
“
I’
dli
ket
ocal
lMr
sNkosi
who’
sgoi
ngt
o
gi
veusanopeni
ngpr
ayer
”mom Zoget
s
upf
rom herseatnex
ttoherhusband
andmakesherwayt
othef
ront
.
“
Goodev
eni
ngev
ery
one”shesi
nga
chor
usandwej
oinher
.If
orgot
somet
imest
hatshe’
saGodf
ear
ing
woman.
“
Thanksev
ery
one,
let
’scl
oseourey
es
andt
hankt
hemanabov
e,whoknew
t
hatt
odaywe’
l
lbegat
her
edher
eto
cel
ebr
atet
hel
oveoft
heset
woast
hey
t
aket
hei
rrel
ati
onshi
ptot
henex
tlev
el”
shesay
sashor
tandsweetpr
ayert
hen
r
eti
ret
oherseatnex
ttoherhusband
whoki
sseshercheek.
“
Niceshor
tandsweett
hat
’showa
pr
ayershoul
dbe,
mom t
akesomet
ips
pl
ease”weshar
eal
augh
“
Okaycanwehav
eourf
ir
stspeaker
,
NokubongaMt
himkhul
uthemot
herof
t
hef
iancée”Mom get
supf
rom herseat
andwal
kst
owar
ds.Shet
akest
hemi
c
f
rom Si
bongi
l
e
“
Eveni
ngev
ery
oneandt
hanky
ouf
or
j
oini
ngus”shel
ooksatus
“
Bant
wanabami
,Ihav
ewat
chedy
our
l
ovegr
owandI
’
m sopr
oudoft
hebot
h
ofy
ou.Ihav
enot
hingt
osayex
cept
congr
atul
ati
ngy
oubot
hofy
ouony
our
engagementandt
hebunnyi
ntheov
en
.
Pleasecont
inuet
olov
eeachot
her
,
r
espect
ingeachot
herandst
ayl
oyal
to
eachot
heral
way
s.Il
ovey
ouki
ds”
Lwenkosi
wipesmyt
ear
s.
“
Thanky
ousi
sBongawi
thouty
ouMi
ra
woul
dn’
tbeher
eandwewoul
dn’
thav
e
hadf
reef
oodandf
reebooz
etoni
ght
”
wel
augh
“
Nowcanwehav
eMrNkosi
thef
ather
ofourMrr
omant
icov
erher
ewho’
s
put
ti
ngpr
essur
eonourboy
fri
ends”
Sboshi
scr
azyy
az.BabBheki
comes
f
orwar
dandt
akest
hemi
c
“
Igr
eeteachandev
eryoneofy
ou.I
can’
tbel
i
evet
hati
twasj
usty
est
erday
whenmywi
feandIuset
ofi
ghtabout
who’
sgoi
ngt
ochangey
ournappymy
son”wegi
ggl
e
“
Ayphel
alombhemuebeshay
aeny
eint
o
enz
imakabi
egcwal
aindl
uyonke”we
bur
sti
ntol
aught
er
“
Dadr
eal
l
ynow!
”Lwenkosi
say
sgr
oans.
“
Butt
odayher
ewear
econgr
atul
ati
ng
y
ouandf
iancéef
ort
hej
our
neyy
out
wo
aboutt
otakeaswel
last
hebundl
eof
j
oywho’
sont
heway
.Letmesaymesay
I
’
m pr
oudoft
hemany
ouar
ebecomi
ng,
keepput
ti
ngy
ourf
iancéeandy
ourki
ds
f
ir
stal
way
smyson.Mi
rat
hanky
ousi
si
f
ornev
ergi
vi
nguponmysonandl
ovi
ng
hi
m whol
ehear
tedl
y.Thel
ovey
out
wo
shar
eisbeaut
if
ul,
Iwi
shy
out
wonot
hing
butbl
essi
ngsf
rom God.
”Hemakeshi
s
wayt
ohi
swi
feaf
tergi
vi
ngSbosht
he
mi
c
“
Lov
ebi
rdscongr
atul
ati
ons,
Iwi
shy
ou
al
lthebest
.That
’swi
l
lbeal
lMr
r
omant
ic/
thef
iancésai
dhewant
sto
keept
hespeechesf
ort
heweddi
ngso
nowl
et’
scel
ebr
ateandhav
efunpeopl
e.
Wai
ter
skeept
hef
oodanddr
inks
comi
ng!
”
Thi
sist
hemostper
fectni
ghtofmyl
i
fe,
seei
ngmyf
ami
l
ygat
her
edher
eto
cel
ebr
atemyengagementwi
thmy
f
iancémel
tsmyhear
t.
“
Youhav
emadechi
ckenf
eetf
ormy
wi
fe?
”Heaskst
hewai
ter
“
Yessi
r,t
heyar
ecomi
ng”
“
Babywhatel
sey
oudowant
?”
“
Any
thi
ngont
hemenuasl
ongasmy
chi
ckenf
eetar
ether
e”Thewai
ter
di
sappear
stogetourf
oodandpourus
dr
inks
“
Don’
tyouhav
ewi
ne?
”
“
Nowi
nemyl
ove”
“
Onegl
asswon’
thur
tst
handwasami
”
“
Nononoy
oucangosi
si,
jui
cei
sfi
ne”
“
Mxm whatki
ndofacel
ebr
ati
oni
sthi
s”
Isul
kandheki
ssesmyl
i
ps.Ii
ndul
geon
myf
ood,
thecat
eri
ngt
eam out
did
t
hemsel
ves.Thi
sist
hebestmeal
Ihav
e
ev
erhav
eandt
hisf
iancéofmi
nei
s
smi
l
ingl
i
keani
diotwhi
l
est
ari
ngatme
“
What
?”
“
I’
mjusthappyy
ouar
emi
ne”
“
It
’snotl
i
keIhav
eachoi
cey
oui
diot
”He
gi
ggl
esandf
eedsmemychi
ckenf
eet
.
“
Mmhbabyt
hesear
ethebestunl
i
ket
he
onesmom cookf
ormebutdon’
ttel
lher
Isai
dso”wel
augh
“
Iwi
l
ltel
lthem t
ogi
veusar
eci
peso
t
hatIcancookt
hem f
ory
ou”
“
You’
ddot
hatf
orme?
”Thi
sguyher
e
hat
escooki
ngnott
hatheknows
ev
ery
thi
ngaboutcooki
nghej
ustknows
t
heeasyst
uffl
i
kef
ryi
nganegg
“
I’
ddoany
thi
ngf
ory
oust
handwasami
”
Iswearmel
t.
“
Thanky
oubabyf
oral
loft
his.I
’
m so
happy
”Il
ookatmyr
ingandsmi
l
e
“
I’
m gl
ady
ouar
ehappy
”
Ev
ery
onei
shav
ingf
unex
pectuncl
eK
who’
sbusyl
ooki
ngatmom danci
ng
wi
thmal
umeThembi
nkosi
“
I’
m comi
ngdancewi
thourpr
incess”
“
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
”
“
Wil
lyour
elax
”mmhni
ggaseemsl
i
ke
hewi
l
lbef
ussi
ngov
ert
hispr
egnancy
.
“
Godancewi
thdaddybabygi
rl
”
“
Whenar
eyoubuy
ingt
hebabymommy
”
“
Yourf
atherwi
l
ltel
lyou”Iwal
kaway
bef
oreshesay
sany
thi
ng.Isi
tonhi
slap
andwr
apmyar
m ar
oundhi
sneck
“
Congr
atul
ati
onsmaf
ungwasewami
”
“
Thanky
oudaddy
”Hel
ooksatmeandI
seet
hatIcaughthi
m of
fguar
d.
“
Idon’
tthi
nkt
her
ewi
l
lev
erbeamanI
woul
dev
erwantasmydaddyex
cept
y
ouuncl
eK.Thanky
ouf
orev
ery
thi
ng
y
ouhav
edonef
orus.Youwi
l
lal
way
sbe
mydaddyev
eni
fyouandmom don’
t
wor
kthi
ngsout
,al
thought
hatwoul
d
br
eakmyhear
t.Il
ovey
oudaddy
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomaf
ungwasewami
”He
hol
dsmet
ight
lyandIcanseemom
l
ooki
ngatuswi
thasadsmi
l
e.
“
SoI
’
m goi
ngt
obeagr
andpa”
“
Yes”
“
Niy
angi
gugi
say
az”(
youguy
sar
e
maki
ngmeol
d)
“
Youar
est
il
lgoi
ngt
obeasl
aygr
andpa
don’
twor
ry”wegi
ggl
e.
“
Stopl
ooki
ngmor
oseandgot
oher
”
“
Idon’
twantt
odi
stur
bher
,itl
ooksl
i
ke
shehasf
oundmyr
epl
acement
”Hi
s
v
oicei
sbr
eaki
ngandIcan’
thel
pbut
l
augh.
“
Whatar
eyoul
aughi
ngat
?”
“
Youar
ejoki
ngr
ight
?”Isayl
ooki
ngat
hi
m
“
Joki
ng?I
’
m notl
ookatt
hem!Ar
ghIf
eel
l
i
kepunchi
ngt
hati
diotonhi
sface,
umf
azi
wam uBonga!
”Il
ookatmom and
uncl
eThembi
nkosi
giggl
i
ngt
hent
hey
wal
kouthol
dinghands.Il
aughev
en
har
derI
’
m notgoi
ngt
otel
lhi
mthatt
hey
ar
esi
bli
ngs,
hewi
l
lfi
ndoutonhi
sown.
“
Uyahl
ekaMi
ramyhear
tisbr
eaki
ng
man!
”(Youar
elaughi
ng)
“
Aski
es”Isayl
aughi
ng
“
Mxm sukal
aphekwami
”(Getof
ffr
om
me)Igetupandwal
kawayl
aughi
ng.
Ncooohe’
ssocut
e.
“
Mir
a”It
urnbackandl
ookather
.It
’s
Ay
andashel
ooksgor
geousImustsay
“
Uhm hey
”Ther
e’sawkwar
dsi
l
ence
“
Congr
atul
ati
onsony
ourengagement
andunbor
nbaby
”shesay
sner
vousl
y
“
Thanky
ouAy
anda”
“
Iwanty
out
oknowt
hatIdon’
that
eyou,
i
t’
snoty
ourf
aul
tthaty
ouownhi
shear
t
andi
t’
sal
sonothi
sfaul
theownsy
our
hear
t.Hewasnev
ermi
net
okeepsoI
woul
dli
kef
orust
otr
yandgetal
ongwe
ar
esi
ster
saf
teral
li
fthatf
inewi
thy
ou
ofcour
se”
“
Ofcour
seIhav
enopr
obl
em wi
tht
hat
Ay
anda.Ial
sodon’
that
eyousot
ruce”I
st
ret
choutmyhandf
orahandshakebut
shet
akesmebysur
pri
seandgi
vesmea
bonecr
ushi
nghug.

Iwasj
ustassur
pri
sedasmydaught
er
was,
Ihadnoknowl
edgeoft
his
pr
oposal
.Si
bongi
l
etr
ickedmeandwhen
wemetmyf
ami
l
yatDudu’
shouse,
I
knewt
hatsomet
hingwasupsot
hey
ex
plai
nedt
ome.I
’
mreal
l
yhappyf
orher
,
shedeser
vesal
loft
hisandmor
e.Thi
s
chi
l
dhasbeent
hroughal
otandr
ight
nowsheneedsnot
hingbutasmoot
h
l
i
fe,
forhert
ohav
eaheal
thypr
egnancy
.
Thepar
tyi
sgoi
ngwel
landev
ery
onei
s
enj
oyi
ngt
hemsel
veswel
lex
ceptmyex
f
iancé.Hehasn’
ttakenhi
sremor
seand
pai
nfi
l
ledey
esawayf
rom mebutI
pr
etendl
i
keIdon’
tcar
eabouthi
m.He’
s
notathi
sbestl
ooksduet
ohear
tache
buthe’
sst
il
laney
ecandy
.Het
akeshi
s
gl
assofwhi
skeyandgul
pitdown,
oh
howImi
ssedt
hosel
i
psagai
nstmi
ne,
hi
shugehandsr
avi
shi
ngmybody
,hi
s
st
rongar
mscar
ryi
ngmel
i
keI
’
ma
f
eat
herandhi
smagi
cst
ickdeepi
nto
me.
“
That
’shi
mri
ght
?”Thembi
nkosi
snaps
meoutofmyogl
i
ngsessi
on.
“
Huh?
”
“
That
’sy
ourf
iancé”
“
Exf
iancé”
“
Whatdi
dhedoBonga,
fory
out
onot
f
orgi
vehi
m phel
athatmanl
ookl
i
kehe’
s
goi
ngt
ocr
y.”Ichuckl
e.
“
It
’sov
ernowsoi
t’
sdoesn’
tmat
ter
”
“
Didhecheat
?”
“
No”Hel
ooksatme
“
Wenz
eni
?”(
Whatdi
dhedo?
)Isi
gh
“
Letmej
ustsayhe’
snott
hemanI
t
houghthei
s”
“
Didhehi
tyou?
”
“
No…Iseey
ouwon’
tlett
hisgosoher
e
goes”Iex
plai
ntohi
m whathappened
“
Youwentt
hroughal
loft
hisal
one
Bongaandy
ounev
ert
oldmeanyshi
t!
”
“
Idi
dn’
twantt
owor
ry….
”
“
Wor
rymekwani
!It
’smyj
obt
owor
ry
abouty
oudammi
t,y
ouar
emysi
ster
!!
”
“
Cal
m downpl
ease”Ibr
ushhi
shand,
he
l
ooksatmeandbr
eat
hesoutl
oudl
y
“
I’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
ttel
lyou,
Iwas
v
ulner
abl
eandbr
okenmymi
ndwasnot
ev
ent
hinki
ngst
rai
ght
.Idon’
tknowwhat
Iwoul
dbewi
thoutMi
ra.Shegav
eme
st
rengt
htof
indoutwhathappened”
“
Ohsi
sIknowt
hatIwasn’
tthebest
br
otherandIhav
enev
erpr
otect
edy
ou
butIwantt
obet
her
efory
ouandMi
ra
pl
easedon’
tshutmeout
.”
“
Iwon’
tshuty
ououtbut
iandI
’
m sor
ry
onceagai
n”
“
I’
m sor
ryy
ouhadt
ogot
hroughal
lof
t
hissi
s.Thatmanneedt
opayhecan’
t
j
ustgetawaywi
tht
his”
“
Kar
mawi
l
ldeal
wit
hhi
m”
“
Who’
sthat
?Don’
ttel
lmeaboutKar
ma
t
her
e’snoasshol
ethatwi
l
lhur
tyouand
notpay
”
“
ComeonThembenkosi
it’
sal
lov
er
now”
“
YazBongay
oudon’
tknowhowmy
hear
tbr
eakseacht
imeIt
hinkof
ev
ery
thi
ngt
hathappenedt
oyou.I
ov
erhear
dmom anddadt
alki
ngdon’
tbe
angr
yatmom.I
t’
sal
lmyf
aul
tifIwas
t
her
easy
ourbi
gbr
othert
opr
otecty
ou
noneofwhaty
ouwentt
houghwoul
d
hav
ehappened.Ihat
emy
sel
fthatIwas
nev
ert
her
etopr
otecty
ouIhat
emy
sel
f
t
hatIdi
dn’
tpl
aymyr
oleasy
ourbr
other
andnowt
hesement
hinkt
heycandoas
t
heypl
easewi
thy
oubecauset
heyknow
y
ouhav
enoonet
opr
otecty
ouf
uck
t
hat
!!
”myhear
tdr
opst
omyst
omach
“
Don’
tbl
amey
our
sel
fbut
i,wewer
est
il
l
y
oungt
henandi
twasnoteasyt
odef
y
ourf
ather
.It
’sal
li
nthepastnowpl
ease
don’
tbehar
dony
our
sel
f.Let
’smov
e
f
orwar
dandbehappyt
hatweuni
ted
andgoteachot
hernow”Hesi
ghs
heav
il
y
“
Iguessy
ouar
eri
ght
”
“
YesIam.
.Cany
oust
il
ldance”He
l
aughs,
mybr
otherwasagooddancer
wayback
“
NoIcan’
tdancenowamat
hambo
sewaqi
nil
e”Il
augh
“
Hai
sukacomeonl
et’
sdance”Igetup
andt
akehi
shand
“
KodwaBo…”
“
Woz
a”Ipul
lhi
m upandwedance
t
oget
her
“
Sti
l
lgoti
tiny
oumos”Hegi
ggl
es
“
Itr
y”I
’
m sogr
atef
ulf
ort
hebondIhav
e
wi
thmysi
bli
ngsespeci
all
ymybr
other
andmyl
i
ttl
esi
sbecauseIt
houghtt
hey
r
esentmef
orwhatIdi
dtooursi
ster
.I
seeMi
raandKcuddl
i
ng,
theyhav
e
gr
ownsocl
oset
hei
rbondi
sev
ery
mot
her
’swi
sh.Not
hingmakesamot
her
happyt
henknowi
ngt
hatherdaught
er
l
oveshermanandt
hemanal
sol
oves
herdaught
er.I
t’
soneoft
het
hingsI
l
ovedaboutKhumal
ohet
reat
edMi
ra
l
i
kehi
sasmuchasKi
s.
“
Can’
tIhav
eonegl
assofwi
ne?
”
“
Nonomom i
sgoi
ngt
oki
l
lme.
”
“
Yousuchabor
ingbr
othery
azi
”we
shar
eagi
ggl
e
“
Comel
et’
sgetsomef
reshai
r”Het
akes
myhandandwewal
ktot
hebal
conyand
l
ookatt
hebeaut
if
ulv
iewoft
heci
ty.
“
Ithi
nky
oushoul
dfor
giv
ehi
m si
s”He
say
saf
terawhi
l
e
“
Who”
“
K”Hemi
micmyv
oice
“
Idon’
ttal
kli
ket
hat
”
“
Yesy
oudo”
“
NoIdon’
t”Hel
aughs
“
Tryt
oputy
our
sel
finhi
sshoes”
“
Idi
dbutIknowIwoul
dhav
egi
venhi
m
achancet
oex
plai
n”
“
Hewaswr
ongIknowbutpl
easecan
y
oui
magi
nenj
eaf
terwaki
ngupf
rom a
comal
ongi
ngf
ory
ourwi
feonl
ytof
ind
pi
ctur
esofheri
nti
mat
ewi
thanot
her
man.
”
“
Heshoul
dhav
etr
ust
edme
Thembi
nkosi
.Ihav
enev
ergav
ehi
ma
r
easonnott
otr
ustme”
”
Iheary
ousi
swami
,butnoonei
s
per
fectaker
e.Ar
eyougoi
ngt
ogi
veup
j
ustbecausehemadeonemi
stake?
Don’
tyoul
ovehi
m?”
“
Idol
ovehi
m butl
ovei
snotenough”
“
I’
m sur
ehel
ear
nthi
slesson”
“
Waz
ewamkhul
umel
abo,
li
kemom and
y
oursi
ster
s”
“
Heseemsl
i
keagoodman.Pl
ease
f
orgi
vehi
m”
“
No”
“
Youar
est
il
lst
ubbor
nasf
uck
r
ememberhowy
ourst
ubbor
nnessused
t
ogety
oui
ntot
roubl
eatschool
”Il
augh
r
emember
ingt
hoseday
s
“
Youwer
esuchabul
l
ykodwasi
swami
”
“
Zaz
ingi
j
way
elal
ezangane”
“
Youar
etheonewhower
etaki
ngt
hei
r
pensandpocketmoneybyf
orce”we
bot
hlaugh.Iwasabul
l
yindeed,
alway
s
f
ight
ing.FunnyenoughInev
erl
osta
f
ightphy
sical
l
yev
enwi
thboy
sbutI
nev
erf
oughtbackwhenKhumal
o
st
art
edabusi
ngmewel
lunt
il
….y
eah
“
Ilov
eyou”Il
ookathi
m andgi
vehi
ma
si
dehug
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Wehearsomeone
cl
ear
ingt
hei
rvoi
cebehi
ndusandt
urnt
o
l
ookatt
hem.I
t’
shi
mthel
ookhe’
s
gi
vi
ngmybr
otherhewoul
dbedeadby
nowi
flookski
l
ls.
“
Bongacanwet
alk”Hesay
sthr
oughhi
s
cl
enchedj
aws
“
Iwi
l
lgi
vey
ouguy
sspace,
don’
tfor
get
whatIsai
d”mybr
othersay
sbef
ore
wal
ki
ngawayl
eav
ingmewi
tht
hishot
l
i
mpi
ngman.
“
Howar
eyou?
”Heasks
“
I’
m goodandy
ou”
“
I’
m dy
ingher
ewi
thouty
ou,
IknowI
hav
emessedpr
ett
ybadbutpl
easehav
e
mer
cyonmybl
eedi
nghear
tBonga.I
l
ovey
ouandIcan’
ttaket
hispai
n
any
mor
eIneedy
oust
handwasami
pl
ease”Hel
i
mpshi
swaycl
oser
.I’
m
suddenl
yfeel
i
ngweaki
nthekneesand
hi
sheav
enl
yscenti
snothel
pingatal
l
.
Hel
i
ftsupmychi
nwi
thhi
sindexf
inger
andourey
esmeet
s
“
Icanseei
tiny
ourey
est
haty
oust
il
l
l
oveme,
justgi
vemeachanceIpr
omi
se
y
ouwon’
tregr
eti
t.
”
“
Youhur
tmeK”Iwhi
sperast
ear
s
t
hreat
ent
ocomeout
“
Iknowbaby
,Iknowbutl
etmef
ixt
hat
,
l
etmemendy
ourbr
okenhear
tpl
ease.I
can’
taf
for
dtol
osey
oungi
yakudi
nga
empi
l
weni
yami
uwubambol
wami
.”Hi
s
v
oicei
sbr
eaki
ngt
hroughev
erywor
d.
“
Takemebackpl
ease”Hi
stear
sfl
ows
f
reel
yonhi
scheeks,
thi
sist
hesecond
t
imeIwi
tnesshi
m cr
yingandi
t’
snota
beaut
if
ulsi
ght
.It
’sbr
eaki
ngmyhear
t
i
ntopi
eces.Iwi
pehi
stear
swi
tht
he
backofmyhandsandst
andwi
thmy
t
oest
oat
tackhi
sli
ps.Her
espondswi
th
mat
chedener
gyandourt
onguesmeet
i
nadance.Ihearsomet
hingf
all
i
ngt
hen
f
eel
hishandsgr
ippi
ngt
ight
lyonmy
wai
standpul
l
ingmecl
osert
ohi
msel
f.
Hi
sbugl
eisgr
owi
ngagai
nstmyt
ummy
,
war
mthspr
eadt
hroughoutmywhol
e
body
.
“
Ilov
eyou”Iwhi
sperst
ari
ngdeepi
nhi
s
ey
es
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Hewhi
sper
sbackand
l
eanshi
sfor
eheadagai
nstmi
ne.
“
Comel
et’
ssi
tdownsot
haty
oucan
r
esty
ourl
eg”
“
Iwantust
ogetoutofher
e.Imi
ssed
y
ousomuch,
Ijustwantt
ohol
dyou
cl
osei
nmyar
ms”
“
Okay
”Ipi
ckuphi
scr
utchesandgi
ve
hi
m.
“
Damnt
hesecr
utchesIwant
edust
o
wal
kint
hatr
oom hol
dinghandssot
hat
i
diotofy
our
scanseet
haty
ouar
emi
ne
ebet
hat
haamachance”Il
augh
“
Don’
tlaughsnookumsseei
ngy
ou
gi
ggl
i
nganddanci
ngwi
thhi
m al
most
st
oppedmyhear
tfr
om beat
ingt
henI
hear
dyousay
ingy
oul
ovehi
m,IswearI
di
ed”
“
That
’smybr
other
”Isaygi
ggl
i
ng
“
Real
l
y?NowonderMi
rawasl
aughi
ng
atme”
“
Yes”
“
Yhooci
shengaf
angi
fel
aubal
a”(
I
al
mostdi
edf
ornot
hing)Il
augh
“
Yekai
skhwel
eI’
m al
lyour
sal
way
sand
f
orev
er”Hef
lashesawi
l
dassmi
l
eand
pl
ant
sapeckonmyl
i
pst
henwemake
ourwayi
nsi
de.If
indmypar
ent
sand
si
ster
sandcompl
ainaboutt
he
headacheofwhi
chi
sal
i
e.
“
Headachemyf
ooty
ouar
egoi
ngt
oget
l
aidwena”Dudusay
sandwel
augh
“
Hai
boy
oucanseet
hathe’
susi
ng
cr
utches”
“
What
ever
”
“
Mom anddadar
egoi
ngt
osl
eepi
nyour
houser
ight
”
“
Yesmyhousei
sbi
genought
o
accommodat
eev
ery
onesodon’
twor
ry”
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Howar
eyouhol
dingupt
houghwi
th
Shakabei
ngi
njai
l
”
“
Kunz
imasi
s,t
hegi
rl
sar
enott
aki
ngi
t
wel
ltheymi
sst
hei
rdaddy
”
“
I’
m sor
ry”Ihugher
,Iknowt
hatKi
sthe
onet
hatgotShakaar
rest
edbutIdon’
t
t
hinkshe’
sreadyt
oheart
hatmay
be
whenshe’
susedt
othesi
tuat
ionIwoul
d
t
ell
hert
her
easonwhyMi
rahadt
oleav
e
herhouse.Iki
ssmypar
ent
sgoodby
e
ki
ssest
hengot
omydaught
er.
“
I’
mleav
ingnow,
Idon’
tfeel
wel
ltake
car
eofy
our
sel
f”
“
Youdon’
thav
etol
i
etome”shesmi
rks
“
Hai
sukawenawoz
a”shegi
ggl
esand
weshar
eahugaf
tert
hatImakemyway
t
oKandf
indhi
m wi
thhi
ssi
ster
.
“
Thanksf
ort
aki
nghi
m backbesengi
khat
hel
eukut
hul
i
sai
ndodaendal
a”we
shar
eal
augh
“
Imi
ssy
out
houghsi
s”shesay
s
“
Imi
ssy
out
oo”weshar
easi
ster
lyhug.
“
Playni
cel
ovebi
rdsourl
egi
sst
il
l
r
ecov
eri
ng”wel
aught
henwal
kout
.I
dr
ivet
ohi
shot
elandwhenwear
ri
ve,
we
cuddl
einbed.I
’
vemi
ssedt
hef
eel
ofhi
s
ski
nagai
nstmi
ne.
“
Snookums”
“
Huh”
“
Who’
sthat
?”Ichuckl
e
“
DaddyK”
“
Thanky
ousomuchf
ort
hissecond
chance.Il
ovey
ousomuch”
“
Ilov
eyout
oobaby
”Weshar
eaheat
ed
ki
sswi
thi
nsecondsI
’
m ont
opofhi
m
r
idi
nghi
scock
“
Shi
t!
!!
”Hegr
oansandt
ight
eni
nghi
s
gr
iponmybut
tocksasher
ockshi
shi
ps
meet
ingmyt
hrust
s
“
Imi
ssedy
oudaddyKahhhmyGod!
”
“
Imi
ssedy
out
oomysnookumsf
uck!
!
Youar
est
il
last
ightasIl
efty
ou!
!I’
m so
sor
ryf
ort
hinki
ngy
ouwoul
dgi
vemy
pussyt
oanot
hermanshhhi
tt
t!
!”I
’
mthe
onet
ocum f
ir
stt
henhef
oll
owsaf
ter
me.If
all
int
oapeacef
ulsl
umberi
nmy
man’
sar
ms.
-

“
PleaseI
’
m beggi
ngy
oudon’
tki
ckme
outoft
hehouse,
Ihav
enowher
etogo”
I
’
m onmykneescr
yingandpl
eadi
ng
wi
tht
hiswomant
onott
hrowmeouton
t
hest
reet
.
“
Okayf
inebuty
ouwon’
tst
ayher
efor
f
reey
ougoi
ngt
odochor
esar
oundher
e
andmakesur
ethatmygr
andchi
l
dren
ar
ebat
hedandf
eddoy
ouhearme?
”
“
Ehmamat
hanky
ousomuch!
”
“
Nowgomakemeat
ea”
“
Idon’
thav
egr
ocer
ies”
“
Kant
iunani
ntombaz
anendi
niy
eses
y
ouar
eusel
essmaan!
!”Shet
akesout
herphonef
rom herbr
eastandmakea
cal
l
.
“
Mydaught
erandmygr
andchi
l
drenar
e
comi
ngt
ost
aywi
thus.Her
e,goand
buyf
ewgr
ocer
ies!
”Shegi
vesmemoney
“
Letmewr
it
eyoual
i
st”shedi
sappear
s
t
oKhosi
’
sbedr
oom andcomeswi
tha
paperandpen.
“
Uyakwaz
iukubhal
a?”(
Doy
ouknow
howt
owr
it
e?)Godwoman,
howol
dam
Ikant
i?
“
Eyamama”shegi
vesmeapaperand
pent
hent
ell
smewhatt
owr
it
e.Oncewe
ar
edone,
Ileav
efort
hemal
l
.I’
m so
gr
atef
ulshedi
dn’
tki
ckmeoutoft
he
houseev
ent
houghIcanseet
hatmy
st
ayt
her
ewi
l
lbehel
l
,I’
m goi
ngt
obe
t
reat
edl
i
keasl
avebuti
t’
sbet
tert
hen
st
ayi
ngont
hest
reeti
nthi
swi
nter
.I’
m
pushi
ngt
het
rol
l
eywhi
l
etaki
ng
ev
ery
thi
ngont
hel
i
stwhenIsmel
la
whi
ffofhi
sscent
.Thent
her
ehecomes
pushi
nghi
str
oll
eyt
hathasabi
gdol
l
,
pi
nkbi
cycl
eandhi
stoi
l
etr
ies.Ourey
es
meetandIcanst
il
lseer
agei
nhi
sey
es.
“
HiDl
ami
ni”
“
Mxm!
”Hewal
kspassedmebutIgr
ab
hi
shand
“
Iknowt
hatImessedupbi
gti
mebut
pl
easedon’
tnegl
ecty
ourchi
l
dren.They
di
dnot
hingwr
ongpuni
shmenott
hem.I
needmoneyf
ordoct
orscheckupsand
f
oodt
oeat
.”
“
Ungaz
ongi
dakel
wawenagot
othe
f
atherofy
ourbabi
es!
”
“
Youar
ethef
atherSox
!”
“
I’
m notaf
ool
thesear
eKhubon’
ski
ds”
“
Dot
hemat
hman!Thi
ski
dsar
eyour
s
whi
l
eyouar
ebusybuy
ingy
our
daught
er’
stoy
srememberabouty
our
unbor
nbabi
es”Iwal
kaway
.He’
sreal
l
y
maki
ngmeangr
yandf
orsomeonewho
hadnof
atherwhenhewasgr
owi
ngup,
hei
sdoi
ngt
hesamet
hinghi
sfat
herdi
d,
l
i
kef
atherl
i
keson.Ipayf
orev
ery
thi
ng
andgobackhome,
wel
lthat
’smyhome
f
ornow.I
’
m wel
comedbysi
xki
ds
pl
ayi
ngar
oundt
hehouse.Iwonderhow
ar
ewegoi
ngt
ost
ayal
ltoget
heri
nthi
s
smal
lhouse?

Seei
ngt
hathoemakesmeangr
ynxand
t
hener
veshehast
otel
lmeshewant
s
money
.Ipayf
orev
ery
thi
ngt
henhi
tthe
r
oad.I
’
m goi
ngt
oJohannesbur
gtosee
mydaught
er.Shehasn’
twar
medupt
o
mebutIwon’
tgi
veuponher
.Ihopet
his
dol
landbi
cycl
ewi
l
lmakei
tupt
oher
.I
ar
ri
vear
ound7pm andchecki
ntot
he
hot
el.
“
Hel
l
o”Mi
rasay
sont
heot
herhand,
it’
s
noi
sywher
eshei
s
“
Heyhowar
eyou”
“
I’
m goodandy
our
sel
f”
“
I'
mfi
net
oo…I
’
minJohannesbur
g,I
washopi
ngIcanspendadaywi
thmy
daught
ert
omor
row”
“
Okayi
fsheagr
eesy
ouwi
l
l”
“
Thanky
ou…Ihur
tyouguy
sandy
ouar
e
enj
oyi
ngt
hatshe’
snotwar
mingupt
o
me.Ideser
vei
tandIknowt
hatt
her
e’s
somet
hingy
oucandot
omakeher
war
m upt
ome,
youar
ehermom she
wi
l
lli
stent
oyouandshet
rusty
ou.
Pl
easehel
pmeoutI
’
m beggi
ngy
ou
mt
wana”
“
Iwi
l
ltr
y”
“
Thanky
ousomuch”
“
Bye”
“
Bye”Ihangup.Ihopeshecomes
t
hroughf
orme.Thenex
tmor
ningI
’
m
wokenupbyMi
ra’
scal
ltot
ell
met
hat
wecanmeetatMcDonal
d’ssoIf
reshen
upqui
ckl
ythengr
abmycarkey
sand
l
eav
e.Ican’
thel
pbutsmi
l
ewhenIsee
t
hem.
“
Hel
l
oladi
es”
“
Hey
..
.babyr
ememberwhatwet
alked
about
”
“
Yesmommy
”
“
Youknowmommywi
l
lnev
eral
l
owy
ou
t
ogowi
thsomeonewhowoul
dhur
tyou
angi
thi
”shenodsherhead
“
Nowgowi
thdaddy
..
hel
ovesy
ou
sweet
hear
t”
“
Gowi
thusmommy
”
“
Ican’
tsweet
hear
tmommyhast
ogot
o
t
hedoct
or”
“
I’
m al
sonotgoi
ngke”shepout
sherl
i
ps.
“
Let
’sgot
oget
herMi
rapl
ease”
“
Ican’
t,
Ihav
epl
answi
thmyf
iancé”
“
Fiancé?
”
“
Yeshepr
oposedy
est
erday
”sheshows
meherr
ing.Ican’
thel
pbutf
eel
ashar
p
pai
nofj
eal
ousy
.
“
Congr
atul
ati
ons”If
akeasmi
l
e
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Cany
oupl
easet
alkt
oLwandl
eIwon’
t
t
akemuchofy
ourt
imej
ustf
orf
ew
hour
s”
“
Whyshoul
dIdot
hisf
ory
ou?
”
“
Youar
edoi
ngi
tforourdaught
ernot
me.Asmuchy
oudon’
twantmenear
herbutshe’
smi
ne,
atsomepoi
ntIhav
e
t
opar
tofherl
i
fe”
“
YouknowwhyIdi
dn’
twanty
ounear
her
”
“
YesIknowandIwantt
ofi
xthatpl
ease
I
’
m beggi
ngy
ou”shehuf
fsandcal
l
Lwandl
eIassume.
“
Wecangobutf
or2hour
s”
“
Thanky
ou”It
akeKamar
iabutshe
r
efuses,
okayi
t’
sst
il
lear
lyl
et’
sseei
f
t
hese2hour
swi
l
lhel
p.Idr
ivet
hem t
o
gol
dreefci
tyandmyhear
tleapwi
thj
oy
whenIseemydaught
erbeami
ngatt
he
si
ghtofki
ddi
esr
ides.Icanseeher
sl
owl
ybutsur
elywar
mingupt
omeand
she’
shav
ingf
un.
“
Daddy
,mommyi
sgoi
ngt
obuyababy
.I
can’
twai
ttohol
dhi
m”wear
enow
wal
ki
ngt
omycarandshe’
sinmyar
ms.
2hour
sisov
erIhav
etot
aket
hem back.
“
Real
l
y”Il
ookatMi
ra
“
Yesshe’
spr
egnant
”Kamar
iasay
s
munchi
ngonherchocol
ate.Iputheri
n
t
hebackseatandpr
esshermom
agai
nstt
hecardoor
,looki
ngdeepi
nher
haz
eley
es
“
Iwi
shImadeamov
eony
ouf
rom t
he
f
ir
stdayImety
ou,
youwoul
dbemi
ne
r
ightnow.I
tbr
eaksmyhear
tthatI
wai
tedf
ory
out
ogr
owandwheny
ou
wer
eol
denoughsomeonecameand
snat
chedy
ouawayf
rom me.Idon’
t
knowwhatI
’
m goi
ngt
odowi
tht
hisl
ove
t
hatIhav
efory
ou.Tel
lmewhatt
odo
wi
thi
tMi
ra?
”Sheopenshermout
hbut
wor
dsar
enotcomi
ngout
.Iunder
standI
caughtherof
fguar
d.
“
Ihat
eyou”Iwhi
sperandpl
antapeck
onherl
i
pst
hengeti
ntomycar
.Idr
ive
of
faf
tershegoti
ntot
hecart
oo.

“
MrNgweny
ashe’
sbeeni
nacomaf
ora
y
earnowsetherf
ree”
“
No!
!Shewi
l
lwakeup!
!Youwi
l
lwakeup
mom r
ight
”Het
akeshi
smom’
shand
andki
ssesi
t
“
Thedoct
ori
sri
ghtZi
khal
iwel
ost
ev
ery
thi
ngpay
ingf
orherbi
l
lsy
ouwant
ust
olosemor
e”
“
Weownmi
l
li
onsnowMz
iwewi
l
lnev
er
r
unoutofmoney
!”
“
Yourmot
herdi
edl
ongt
imeago,
these
machi
nesar
ekeepi
ngheral
i
ve.Lether
goman.Iknowi
t’
snoteasybutt
hat
's
whatshewoul
dhav
ewant
ed,
fory
out
o
l
etherRestI
nPeace”
“
CanIbeal
onewi
thmymot
herpl
ease”
Thedoct
orandMz
iwal
ksoutl
eav
ing
Zi
khal
ii
ntear
s.Heknewdeepdownt
hat
he’
slosi
ngt
hisbat
tl
ebutt
her
ewashi
nt
ofhopet
hathi
smom wi
l
lwakeup.
“
I’
m sor
rymama,
Itr
iedt
osav
eyoubutI
f
ail
edy
ou,
pleasef
orgi
veme”Hespend
al
mostanhourcr
yingandbi
ding
f
arewel
ltohi
smom unt
ilhebr
avedup
andswi
tchof
fthemachi
ne.

………………….
..
.Fi
veMont
hs
Lat
er…………….
..
..
..
.
HappyBi
rt
hdayDi
kel
edi
Cat
eMak

CHAPTER75(
unedi
ted)
Thepastf
ivemont
hshav
ebeenv
ery
busybutI
’
m notcompl
aini
ngbecause
f
inal
l
yIhav
emyv
eryownonl
i
ne
cl
othi
ngbusi
ness.I
’
m sel
l
ingmoder
n
t
radi
ti
onal
seshweshweandt
radi
ti
onal
accessor
iesofwhi
char
edesi
gnedby
my
sel
f.Honest
lyInev
ert
houghtIhav
eit
i
nmet
odesi
gncl
othesbutIhav
e
al
way
slov
edf
ashi
on.I
t’
sst
art
ed
oper
ati
ngt
woweeksbackandI
t’
sdoi
ng
gr
eat
.Ihav
etonsoff
oll
ower
sal
ready
oni
nst
agr
am.Hav
ingacel
ebr
it
y
daught
erhasi
tper
ksbecauseI
’
m al
so
usi
nghert
oadv
ert
isemydesi
gns.The
pl
ani
stogr
owmyownf
ashi
onsot
his
i
sjustf
orst
art
ersandwhatIhadi
n
mi
ndwhenIst
art
edt
hisbusi
ness.I
meanti
twhenIsai
dIwantsomet
hingof
myownwi
thoutany
one’
shel
pasIhav
e
sai
dthatIhav
ebeendoi
ngr
esear
ch.
Dur
ingmyr
esear
chIf
oundI
mbokodo
NonGov
ernmentOr
gani
sat
ionownedby
t
het
wins,
MrsZwane&Mr
sXul
u.They
i
nvent
edi
ttoempowerwomen.Al
lyou
needi
sabusi
nesspl
anandsetupa
meet
ingwi
tht
hem t
odi
scussy
ourpl
an.
I
ftheyar
esat
isf
iedwi
thy
ourbusi
ness
pl
ant
heyhel
pyouwi
thast
artupcapi
tal
.
Theyhav
ehel
pedal
otofwomenout
t
her
eI’
m soi
nspi
red.
“
Don'
ttel
lmet
hatIdr
oveal
ltheway
f
rom Dur
bant
owat
chy
ougl
uedony
our
i
Pad?
”
“
I’
m sor
ryIwasj
ustchecki
ngmy
emai
l
s”Ipl
acemyi
Padasi
deandl
ook
athi
m
“
Hav
eyouor
der
ed?
”
“
HowdoIknowwhatdoy
ouwantt
o
eat
?”Ir
oll
myey
es
“
Cont
inuer
oll
yourey
esatme
snookums”Ir
emembert
hedayI
r
ecei
vedapuni
shmentf
orey
esr
oll
God
Iwasi
nbedt
hewhol
edaymybodywas
achi
ngIdon’
twantt
oment
ionmynana.
Ibi
temyl
i
pandcr
ossmyl
egs.Hecal
l
s
f
ort
hewai
terandwepl
aceouror
der
.
“
How’
syourbusi
nessdoi
ng?
“
Greatst
handwasami
thanky
ouf
or
aski
ng”
“
I’
m sopr
oudofy
ou”Ismi
l
e
“
Thanky
ou”
“
So?
”
“
What
?”
“
ComeonBongay
ouknowwhatImean”
“
GoshKIdon’
tunder
standwhat
’st
he
r
ushbout
”
“
Arey
oust
il
lpuni
shi
ngme?
”
“
Ofcour
senotbabyIj
ustwantust
o
t
aket
hingssl
owl
yokayandknoweach
ot
herbet
ter
”
“
Iknowev
ery
thi
ngIneedt
oknowabout
y
ouandI
’
m anopenbookwhatmor
edo
y
ouneedt
oknowaboutme?
”Thi
stopi
c
i
sget
ti
ngol
dnow.Hewant
stosendhi
s
uncl
esathomebutIwantust
oknow
eachot
hermor
eyouknowespeci
all
y
af
terwhathappened.If
eel
li
kewear
e
notr
eadyf
ormar
ri
ageasmuchaswe
t
hought
.
“
Bongakhul
umaphel
a”(
Tal
k)
“
Ngi
thi
niKhuz
ani
?”(
Andsaywhat
?)
“
WhydoIf
eel
li
key
oudon’
twantt
o
mar
rymeany
mor
e?”
“
Iwantt
omar
ryy
ouKbutnotnowand
besi
deMi
rai
sget
ti
ngmar
ri
ednex
t
mont
h,I
’
m busywi
tht
heweddi
ng
pr
epar
ati
ons”
“
Wewoul
dhav
eadoubl
eweddi
ng
st
handwasami
”Het
akesmyhandsi
nto
hi
sandki
ssest
hem
“
Mot
heranddaught
erget
ti
ngmar
ri
ed
ont
hesamedayi
sn’
tthatbeaut
if
ul.I
l
ovesummerweddi
ngsi
fwedon’
tget
mar
ri
ednowt
henwhen?
”
“
May
beFebr
uar
y,mont
hofl
ove”
“
Anot
hert
womont
hsuy
int
ombi
yami
ay
ngekeBongaI
’
mtoool
dtohav
ea
gi
rl
fr
iendandIwantt
owakeupnex
tto
y
ouev
erysi
ngl
eday
.Thi
str
avel
i
ngi
s
notwor
kingf
orme”Thewai
terbr
ings
ourf
oodandwei
ndul
ge.
“
Twomont
hsi
snot
hingKcomeon”
.I
don’
tunder
standwhycan’
the
under
stand.Myphoner
ings,
Nomai
s
cal
l
ing
“
Noma”
“
Yougood?
”
“
Yesandy
ou?
”
“
I’
m al
sof
inehav
eyouhear
dthatZi
khal
i
commi
tt
edsui
cide”
“
OhnoIhav
en’
twhathappened”
“
Idon’
thav
eful
li
nfoIwoul
dlety
ou
knowwhenIgett
otheof
fi
ce”
“
Okayt
hanksf
orl
ett
ingmeknow”
“
Shar
p”
“
Sur
e”Ihangupandl
ookatK
“
What
?”
“
Zikhal
icommi
tt
edsui
cide”
“
Goodf
orhi
m”Ist
udyhi
sey
es
“
Wenz
eni
Khuz
ani
?”
“
Whatdoy
oumean?
”
“
Youdi
dsomet
hingt
ohi
m di
dn’
tyou?
”
“
Hai
bowhatdoessui
cidegott
odowi
th
me.
”
“
Youwant
edhi
mtopaynj
e”
“
Vel
ebuty
out
hinkIwoul
dhav
ewai
ted
al
lthesemont
hs.TheKhumal
omenar
e
cowar
dsf
rom t
hef
athert
othesons.He
t
ookaneasywayouti
gwal
ael
i
nya
manz
i!
”
“
Vusi
wasnotacowar
d”
“
Ohr
eal
l
y”
“
Khuz
ani
what
’sy
ourpr
obl
em kahl
e
kahl
e?”
“
Mxm!
”Heget
supandwal
ksout
l
eav
ingmeannoy
edashel
l
.The
obsessi
onhehasf
ormar
ri
agei
s
maki
nghi
m moodyIcan’
tkeepupwi
th
hi
scr
anki
ness!

Ihav
enocompl
aint
sfort
hepassed
mont
hs,
adapt
ingt
onewl
i
fehasbeen
mucheasi
ert
henIant
ici
pat
edbecause
oft
hesuppor
tIhav
ebeenr
ecei
vi
ng
f
rom myf
ami
l
yandmyf
iancé.Hopef
ull
y
i
nay
earIwoul
dbel
i
vingt
hisl
i
fel
i
kea
pr
owhowasbor
nwi
thsi
ght
.The
pr
egnancyhav
ebeent
reat
ingmewel
l
sur
pri
singl
yal
thoughsomeday
sar
enot
t
hesameasot
her
s.I
’
mtr
yingsohar
d
nott
ost
ressmy
sel
fandt
hinkal
ot
becauset
hatwhatl
edmet
ohav
ea
t
raumat
icpr
egnancy
.Iwasi
nandoutof
t
hehospi
tal
,anx
iousandsui
cidal
itwas
j
ustamess.I
t’
sst
il
lbaf
fl
esmehowdi
d
Kamar
iamakei
t.She’
sal
i
ttl
ewar
ri
or
t
hatone,
speaki
ngofherIhadt
obeal
so
bet
her
ewhenMpendul
owant
edt
o
spendt
imewi
thhermucht
oLwenkosi
’
s
di
sappr
oval
.Iwasf
eel
i
nggui
l
tyabout
hi
sconf
essi
onandt
hepai
ninhi
sey
es
st
il
lhaunt
smeev
ent
oday
.Iknowt
hat
i
t’
snotmyf
aul
tthathenev
ert
oldme
howhef
eel
saboutmeunt
ilt
hatdaywe
hadsexbutIcan’
tmy
sel
fIf
eel
li
keI
bet
ray
edhi
m somehoworIowehi
m.
May
bei
fIdi
dn’
tsl
eepwi
thhi
mitwoul
d
hav
ebeenbet
ter
.Ist
il
lhav
eregr
ets
aboutt
hatdaybutcr
yingov
eranspl
i
t
mi
l
kwon’
thel
p.

Ideci
dednott
oconf
rontGugui
t’
snot
l
i
kei
twoul
dchangeany
thi
ngIdon’
t
ev
enknowwher
eshel
i
ves.Ihopel
i
fei
s
t
reat
inghert
hewayshedeser
vef
or
pl
ayi
ngwi
thourf
eel
i
ngs.I
’
m get
ti
ng
mar
ri
ednex
tmont
h,onmybi
rt
hday16
December
.IfIknewI
’
dbet
hisugl
yand
bi
gIwoul
dhav
ewai
tedt
ogi
vebi
rt
h
f
ir
stt
hengetmar
ri
ed.Thet
hingi
sI
want
edmyweddi
ngt
obei
nsummer
,
ev
ery
thi
ngi
sbeaut
if
ulandbl
ossomi
ng
i
nsummer
.Iwoul
dgi
vebi
rt
hinMar
ch
andI
’
m cr
ossi
ngf
inger
sthati
twi
l
lbeon
Kamar
ia’
sbi
rt
hday28Mar
ch.It
hinki
t’
s
saf
etosayl
i
fei
sgoody
eahmani
t’
s
goodf
orachange.Mom ownsanonl
i
ne
cl
othi
ngbusi
nessandI
’
m sopr
oudof
herev
ent
houghIwashur
tthatshe
di
dn’
twantmet
oassi
stherwi
thcapi
tal
.
Iunder
standt
hatshewant
edt
odo
somet
hingf
orher
sel
fwi
thoutany
one’
s
hel
pbutI
’
m notany
one,
I’
m her
daught
er.Iwoul
dhav
ereal
l
y
appr
eci
atedt
ohel
pheroutj
ustt
oshow
gr
ati
tudeandappr
eci
ati
onf
or
ev
ery
thi
ngshehasdonef
orme,
plusI
’
m
maki
nggoodmoney
.Ichar
ge80kf
ora
f
eat
ureandIhav
efeat
ured3t
imest
hen
t
her
ear
egi
gsl
eftr
ightandcent
er.I
don’
twantt
oment
iont
hesal
esoft
he
al
bum aswel
last
hesi
ngl
ethatr
eached
Gol
d.Iswearmydaught
erwi
l
lst
art
pr
ivat
eschool
atcr
èchel
ol.
Ir
usht
othel
adi
eswi
tht
ear
sbl
urr
ing
myv
isi
on,
sitont
het
oil
etseatt
hen
bur
sti
ntot
ear
s.
“
Mir
aopenuppl
ease”Idon’
trepl
yher
butcr
ylouder
“
PleaseI
’
m beggi
ng.Londi
isadi
ck!
”He
i
sthebi
ggestdi
ckoft
hedi
ckesti
nthe
wor
ldofdi
cks!
“
Openupmyl
ovepl
ease”
“
GoawayLee”If
inal
l
ysayt
hroughmy
muf
fl
edsobs.
“
Pleaseopenup”Igetupf
rom t
heseat
andopent
hedoorf
orher
,shepul
l
sme
t
oherar
ms
“
I’
m sor
ryuy
aphaphauLondi
”
“
Buthe’
sri
ghtLeeI
’
m ugl
y,f
atand
di
sgust
ing”Idon’
tunder
standwhyhe’
s
someant
ome.
“
Heyheydon’
tmi
ndt
hatj
erk.Youar
e
pr
egnantbabesandy
ourar
eso
beaut
if
ul”
“
Youar
ely
ingLeey
ouj
ustwantt
omake
mef
eel
bet
ter
”
“
Doesi
twor
k?”
“
No”Ishakemyhead
“
Youwer
ecompl
aini
ngabouthunger
l
et’
sgogetsomebur
ger
sandmom
Popi
’
schi
ckenf
eet
”shewi
pesmyt
ear
s
andki
ssesmyf
orehead.Ir
insemyf
ace
t
henwemakeourwayt
othest
udi
oto
getourphonesandbags.
“
Youar
eleav
ing?
”
“
Yes”
“
Butwear
enotdone”
“
Wewer
en’
tev
ensupposedt
obeher
e
Londi
it’
sSat
urdayt
oday
.Abr
eaki
s
needed!
”Leesay
s
“
Abr
eakwoul
dnotmaket
hissong
comet
oget
her
!Mi
raar
eyouher
efor
br
eaksormaki
ngmusi
c?”
“
Youar
eov
erwor
kinghermaan
Londi
siz
we!She’
spr
egnantf
orcr
ying
outl
oudsheneedst
orest
!”
“
Idi
dn’
tfuckherpr
egnant
!!
”
“
Argt
akey
ourper
sonal
issuesoutof
wor
k!”
“
Whatdoest
hatsupposet
omean!
”
“
Youknowt
haty
ouar
emi
str
eat
ingher
becauseshe’
sget
ti
ngmar
ri
edt
o
Lwandl
e!Youwi
shi
twasy
ou!
!”Hehas
beenshowi
ngmef
lamest
hesepassed
mont
hs.Not
hingatal
lmakeshi
m happy
andwor
kingwi
thanangr
yper
soni
snot
ni
ceatal
l
.He’
ssomeananddemandi
ng
t
hei
mpossi
blef
rom me.HowcanIl
ear
n
t
hewhol
esongandsi
ngi
tper
fect
ly
wi
thi
n30mi
nuet
s.He’
ssoi
mpossi
ble!
“
That
’snott
rue!f
att
ycomel
et’
s
cont
inue!
”
“
YouknowwhatIqui
t!
”
“
Gosi
swewer
en’
tev
enshor
twi
thy
ou.
Wehav
epl
ent
yofar
ti
stswhoar
e
maki
ngusal
otofmoney
!Lal
elay
ou
don’
thav
eiti
nyou,
youwonbecause
wewer
efeel
i
ngsor
ryf
ory
ou!
!”Igr
abmy
phoneandmybagt
henst
orm outwi
th
t
ear
sst
reami
ngdownmyf
ace.It
ake
t
heel
evat
ort
othegr
oundf
loorandt
he
momenti
t’
sopensIr
ushoutandbump
i
ntohi
sbody
.Hel
etsgooft
heWi
mpy
paperbagdownonf
loorandhol
dsme
i
nhi
sar
ms.
“
Ssshi
t’
sokaymyl
ovedaddyi
sher
e
now”Heki
ssesmyf
oreheadandt
ight
en
hi
shol
donme.Isi
nki
nmysaf
eheav
en
andhol
dhi
mfordearl
i
fe.
“
Mir
a”IhearLee’
svoi
cebehi
ndus.Ipul
l
backandl
ookather
“
I’
m sor
ry…”
“
It
’sokayLee.
..
let
’sgetoutofher
ebaby
”
Hewi
pesmyt
ear
sandpi
cksupt
he
paperbagt
henoutwego.Theway
homeseem t
obet
ool
ongI
’
m hungr
y
r
ightnowsoIi
ndul
geonmybur
ger
.
“
what
’sgoi
ngonbaby
,whomadey
ou
cr
y”
“
Iqui
tmyj
ob”
“
What
?Why
?”Iknowi
fIt
ell
himt
he
t
rut
hhewi
l
lconf
rontLondi
orwor
se
ev
enpunchhi
sface.
“
Idon’
tli
kesi
ngi
ngany
mor
e”Hel
ooks
atme
“
Youar
ely
ingdol
l
face”
“
Whyy
oudi
dn’
ttel
lmey
ouar
ecomi
ng”
“
Pleasedon’
tchanget
hesubj
ectwhy
di
dyouqui
tyourj
ob”
“
Angi
sat
handi
ukucul
aangi
shongi
yasho
mosIj
ustwantt
osi
tathomeandnur
se
mypr
egnancy
”(Idon’
tli
ket
osi
ng
any
mor
eI’
mtel
l
ingy
ou)
“
Somet
hinghappenedi
nther
eyouwer
e
cr
yingf
orChr
istsakeIwantt
oknow
whathappenedorIwi
l
lu-
tur
nandgo
f
indoutmy
sel
f!
”Isi
ghhewon’
tlett
his
gonowwoul
dhe?
“
Londi
cal
l
edmef
at,
ugl
yanddi
sgust
ing
andsai
dhef
eel
ssor
ryf
ormebecause
y
ouwi
l
lleav
emeanddat
ehi
sbeaut
if
ul
si
ster
…”
“
Utheni
!!
”
“
Iwassohear
tbr
okenbabyi
t’
snott
he
f
ir
sthecal
l
smenamessoIdeci
det
o
qui
t”
“
Uyahl
any
alonx
!”Hemaket
heu-
tur
n
“
No!Dontpl
easeIdon’
twantt
ofi
ght
j
ustl
eti
tgo”
“
Mir
athatbast
ardwon’
ttal
kshi
ttoy
ou
andIl
eti
tgo!Youdon’
tdeser
vet
his
t
reat
ment
!”
“
Iknowbabyv
iol
encewon’
tsol
ve
any
thi
ngcanwej
ustcal
m downandgo
home”
“
Nxaux
haphwaut
uvi
lo!
”Het
akes
anot
herr
out
ethatl
eadst
omy
apar
tment
.Uponar
ri
val
Hecar
ri
esme
andpl
acesmeont
hecoucht
henf
etch
mysecondbur
gerandchi
ckenf
eeti
n
t
hecar
.
“
Thanky
oul
ovecany
oupl
easepourme
agl
assofmaas”Henodsand
di
sappear
stot
heki
tchen.Ist
ret
chov
er
t
otaket
her
emot
ethenswi
tchont
het
v.
Kamar
iai
swi
thMpendul
o,mom i
s
pr
obabl
yonherwayt
oDur
bant
osee
dadsoI
’
m homeal
one.Hecomesback
wi
thagl
assofmaasandgi
vei
ttome
“
Aveusi
sthandway
az”Hesmi
l
esand
si
tsnex
ttomeput
ti
ngmyl
egsonhi
s
l
apst
henbr
ushesmyt
ummy
“
Heyper
iper
ichi
ckenf
eet
..
.i
t’
sdaddy
comepl
aywi
thdaddy
”Hehasbeen
qui
ett
odayIdon’
tknowwhykant
ihe’
s
qui
teanener
get
icsoccerpl
ayer
.He
ev
enwakesmeatni
ghtwi
thki
cks.
“
Uthul
ebaby
”
“
He’
squi
ett
odayIdon’
tknowwhy
”Ibi
te
mybur
geranddr
inkmymaas
“
Ist
hatnor
mal
?May
beweshoul
dgot
o
t
hedoct
or”
“
Rel
axbabyI
’
m sur
ehe’
sokay
”Yeswe
knowt
hegenderi
t’
saboyandIwas
hopi
ngf
oraboyv
ele,
Lwenkosi
didnt
car
ehe’
sov
ert
hemoont
hathe’
sgoi
ng
t
obet
hef
ather
.Kamar
iawar
nedme
t
hatIshoul
dbuyababyboynotagi
rl
becauseshe’
stheonl
ypr
incesswe
needapr
incenow.I
’
m sur
pri
sedwhy
shehasn’
taskedmeaboutmygr
owi
ng
t
ummyeyphel
alenganei
nemi
buz
o
engaphel
ifut
hii
yagobhoz
ainj
alonj
e.He
st
art
ski
cki
ngandLwenkosi
beams.
“
Didy
ouf
eel
that
?”Ir
oll
myey
esduh
“
Sinceubonanj
euy
athandaukupequl
a
amehl
oyazbekunconoungaboni
”(Ev
er
si
ncey
oucanseey
oul
i
ker
oll
i
ngy
our
ey
esi
twasbet
terwheny
ouwer
ebl
i
nd)I
bur
sti
ntol
aught
erandt
hisl
i
ttl
echamp
ki
cksmehar
der
.Idi
dn’
tenj
oyt
hese
ki
ckswhenIwaspr
egnantwi
thKamar
ia.
They
’reev
ery
thi
ngI
’
mtel
l
ingy
ou.
“
mfanakababaz
i..
awuz
weke”Lookat
t
hisi
diotcheer
inghi
m on.
“
Ihav
east
ri
kerher
ebaby
”Looki
ngat
hi
m beami
ngl
i
ket
hisi
t’
sal
way
shear
t
war
ming
“
Mam Nkosi
”
“
BabNkosi
”
“
Ngi
yabongangendl
ali
fa”(
Thanky
ouf
or
anhei
r)
“
Kubongami
naMpangaz
itha”(
I’
mthe
onewho’
sthankf
ul)weshar
ea
passi
onat
eki
sst
henhel
ooksatme
i
ntensel
y
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Iknow”Hepokesmecausi
ngmet
o
gi
ggl
e
“
Dudedi
dyouknowt
hatonedayy
ou
wi
l
lbesmi
tt
enbyt
hebl
i
ndgi
rl
”He
gi
ggl
es
“
Yesi
twasl
oveatf
ir
stsi
ght”Il
augh
“
Weeeemameeey
ouj
ustwant
edt
o
t
ast
ethebl
i
ndgi
rl
’spussybuti
ttr
apped
y
ou!Uz
ogci
nauhambauf
unaukut
ast
e
nj
e”webur
sti
ntol
aught
er
“
Uyaphaphay
az!
”Het
ickl
esmeandI
’
m
gi
ggl
i
ngnonest
op
“
Youar
ebl
i
ndgi
rlnquz
afi
edmyni
gga”
Heshr
iekswi
thl
aught
ert
ear
sfal
l
ing
downhi
sface
I
’
m nquz
a..
.what
”Hest
art
slaughi
ngal
l
ov
eragai
n
“
Godwomany
ouar
ecr
azy
!”
“
Andy
oul
ovemel
i
ket
his”
“
Ofcour
se”Heki
ssesmyl
i
ps.Igetup
f
rom t
hecouchandgowashmygl
ass.
“
Youshoul
dn’
thav
ebaby
”Hesay
s
snaki
nghi
shandsf
rom behi
ndand
ki
ssi
ngmyneck.
”
it
’s.
..
it
’sj
ustagl
assbaby
”It
il
tmyhead
onmysi
det
ogi
vehi
m mor
eaccessof
myneck,
hei
sst
roki
ngt
hatsensi
ti
ve
spotbehi
ndmyearwi
thhi
stongue
“
Baby
”Imoansof
tl
ypushi
ngmybut
ton
hi
sgr
owi
ngbul
ge.
“
Wher
e’smommydear
est
?”
“
Onherwayt
oDur
ban”
“
Thatmeanswehav
eal
lthi
shouset
o
our
sel
ves”
“
Yessssahh”If
eel
hisonehandgoi
ng
undermydr
essandsl
i
dei
ntomy
pant
ieswhi
l
etheot
heri
spi
nchi
ngmy
sensi
ti
veni
ppl
eov
ermydr
ess.He
spr
eadsmyf
oldsandf
eel
mywetcunt
.
I
’
m al
readywetandt
rembl
i
ngunderhi
s
t
ouch.Ihol
dhi
sheadf
rom asi
deandwe
shar
easul
tr
yki
ss.If
eel
theheatr
adi
ate
t
hroughmywhol
ebodyashi
sfi
nger
s
wor
konmycl
i
t.
“
Rightt
her
ebaby
..
.y
es.
.y
esss!
”It
rembl
e
i
nhi
sar
msasIr
eachor
gasm.Hebends
meabi
tandsl
i
demypant
iesasi
det
hen
ent
ermesl
owl
y.
“
Fuck!
”IgaspasIhol
dont
hesi
nk,
scr
eamsofpl
easur
erol
loutofmy
mout
h.Hei
spumpi
ngandpoundi
ngme,
r
eachi
ngpl
acesIf
eel
li
kehehasnev
er
r
eachbef
ore.Het
akesof
fmypant
ies
andl
i
ftsmeupbef
oreput
ti
ngmeont
op
oft
hest
ovet
hendi
sappear
sundermy
dr
ess.It
hrowmyheadont
heback
enj
oyi
nganel
ect
ri
fyi
ngsensat
ion
causedbyhi
stongue.
“
OhhmybabyYes”Idon’
tev
enknow
whatt
odowi
thmy
sel
fthi
sismi
nd
bl
owi
ng.Heget
supandl
ooksupatme
l
i
cki
nghi
sli
ps
“
umnandi
sthandwasami
”
“
Comecl
oserIwantt
otast
emy
sel
fin
y
ourl
i
ps”Henear
sandweki
sst
ongues
f
ight
ingf
ordomi
nance.He’
sfi
ddl
i
ng
wi
thhi
spant
sforasecondwase
ewubhushekakamnandi
kanj
ani
.Imoan
i
nhi
smout
h.He’
shi
tt
ingev
erysensi
ti
ve
par
tofmybei
ngst
rokebyst
roke.Ican
f
eel
tear
spr
ickl
i
ngi
nthecor
ner
sofmy
ey
es.Isuckonhi
sfor
efi
ngerashe
poundsme,
eyesl
ockedoneachot
her
.
“
Ivul
ebabyi
vul
eahhhshi
t”Ispr
eadmy
l
egswi
derandhehol
dst
hem f
or
suppor
t
“
Whydon’
tyouunder
standwear
enot
r
eadyf
ormar
ri
age!
”
“
Arey
out
ryi
ngt
otel
lmey
ouar
enot
r
eady
!!
”nowhatar
etheydoi
ngher
eI
t
houghtmom wentt
oDur
ban!They
f
reez
eri
ghtont
hedoort
hei
rey
es
l
ockedonus.Lor
dtakemenowpl
ease!

I
’
m chi
l
li
ngwi
tht
heguy
sbyt
hepool
and
hav
ingbeer
swhi
l
ethel
adi
esar
ehav
ing
wi
nei
nsi
det
hehouse.Qhaweandhi
s
wi
fewashost
ingabr
aai
.Theki
dsar
e
pl
ayi
ngar
oundandI
’
m happyt
hatmy
daught
eri
senj
oyi
ngher
sel
f.I
ttook3
mont
hst
ospendt
imewi
thherwi
thout
hermom’
spr
esence.I
’
m gr
atef
ult
hat
hermom metmehal
fwayandspent
t
hosehour
stoget
herwi
thus.Am I
wr
ongt
osayt
hatt
hosewer
ebeaut
if
ul
moment
sofmyl
i
fe,
justt
het
hreeofus
t
oget
her
.Iseemydaught
erf
all
i
ngon
t
hegr
oundandgetupt
oat
tendherbut
Qhawest
opsme
“
Let
’sherbe,
ki
dsf
all
ever
ynowand
t
hent
hat
’showt
heygr
ow”
“
Andshe’
snotcr
ying”-
Ray
“
Letmej
ustchecki
fshe’
sokayshe
coul
dbehur
t”
“
Uyay
itot
osal
engane”
-Qhawesay
“
IfIknewbet
terI
’
dsayumamaway
o
wakudl
i
sangez
iny
embi
zay
o..y
athi
ny
weusuy
atat
azel
a”Lami
say
sandt
hey
bur
sti
ntol
aught
er.
“
Ani
ngi
yeket
hat
’smyoneandonl
y
pr
incess”Iswi
gonmybeer
“
Ihear
dhermom i
sget
ti
ngmar
ri
ednex
t
mont
h”-
Lami
“
Yeah”
“
Yakuphuny
ukakanj
ani
leny
ant
okaz
i
Mpendul
o?”-Sbonga
“
it
’sal
ongst
ory
”
“
Wehav
eti
mer
ightbr
os”
“
Yeah”Theyal
lsayl
i
keschool
kids.I
ex
plai
nfur
ther
.
“
YhoooI
m sor
rymyman”-
Siy
athokoz
a
“
Andy
out
houghty
ouwer
edoi
ngt
he
r
ightt
hingbywai
ti
ngf
orhert
ogr
owa
l
i
ttl
ethensomei
diotcomesandsnat
ch
herawayf
rom y
ou”-
Ray
“
Kwesi
nyei
skhat
hiuy
akuf
elaukuba
r
ightukubawav
alal
enganei
ncane
i
njal
o”(
somet
imest
hosewhoar
eri
ght
suf
fery
oushoul
dhav
ejustmadea
mov
eont
hatgi
rlasy
oungasshewas)-
Lami
“
Eishneh”Isayt
aki
nganot
herbeerf
rom
t
hecool
erbox
“
Nowy
ougoi
ngt
owat
chy
oursoul
mat
e
mar
ryi
nganot
heri
diot
”-Ray
“
Ha.
ahRayIknowt
hatl
ookofy
our
syou
wantt
ogi
vemycousi
nideasnoman.
Weai
n’
tpl
ayi
ngdi
rt
y.Mpendul
ohast
o
l
ear
nal
essont
hatwheny
oul
ove
someoney
oumustt
ell
them don’
thol
d
i
tbackbecausey
ouenduphur
ti
ng
y
our
sel
f”-
Qhawe
“
TruemanIt
hinkf
ory
oursakej
ustl
eti
t
goandmov
eonmay
beshewasnev
er
meantt
obey
our
stobegi
nwi
th.
Somet
imeswel
ovepeopl
ethatdon’
t
l
oveus,
li
fest
il
lgoeson.Yoursoul
mat
e
i
scomi
ngandshewi
l
lmakey
our
eal
i
ze
whyy
ouandhernev
erwor
kedout
”-
Lami
“
Yahneh”Isay
“
Whenwast
hel
asty
out
alkedt
oGugu?
”
-
Qhawe
“
Yourwi
fesenty
out
otal
ktomei
sn’
tit
”
“
Nookayy
esbuthonest
lyMpendul
oyou
can'
tnegl
ecty
ourbabi
es”
“
Theyar
enotmi
ne!
”
“
Howsur
ear
eyou?
”-Qhawe.
“
I’
m notbutIdon’
twantt
oseet
hatgi
rl
whenIl
ookatherIf
eel
li
kest
rangl
i
ng
her
!”
“
Shewaswr
ongf
inebuty
ouar
eal
so
puni
shi
ngy
ourki
dsst
opsay
ingt
heyar
e
noty
our
swheny
oudon’
tev
enhav
e
pr
oof
.Yazuz
ozi
sol
angal
ent
ooy
enz
ayo”
-
Mabut
ho
“
Uhl
anganaphi
Mabut
hoez
indabeni
z
ami
?Ngat
hisewungi
ngena
esi
khwameni
toomuch.Lal
elaangi
siso
mi
nai
sit
abaneangi
wudl
iumdi
diweny
e
i
ndoda!
”Idon’
tknowhowandwhendi
d
hegotupf
rom hi
schampchai
r.He
punchesmet
henpul
l
smeupbymy
cl
othes.It
ryt
opunchhi
m back.I
t’
sfi
st
t
ofi
stbat
tl
eunt
ilt
heguy
spul
lusaway
f
rom eachot
her
.
“
Ngi
zokuny
athel
amasi
mbakho!
”He
r
oar
sinanger
“
Woz
amanj
emdi
dieat
er!
”
“
Stopi
tmaanMpendul
o”-Qhawe
“
Bhenguehl
i
saumoy
a”-
Sbonga
“
Don'
ttel
lmet
ocal
m downIwon’
t
wat
cht
hisboydi
srespectme.Iwasj
ust
gi
vi
nghi
m anadv
iceIwasn’
tfi
ght
inghe
shoul
dhav
ejustsai
dImustmi
ndmy
busi
nessnott
hisshi
t!
”Hewi
ggl
esf
rom
hi
shusband’
sgr
ibandj
umpsonme.
He’
spunchi
ngmenonest
opandIt
ryt
o
f
ightbacki
nvai
n.Icanhearmy
daught
ercr
ying,cal
l
ingoutf
ormet
hen
ev
ery
thi
nghappenssof
asti
na
t
winkl
i
ngofaney
emydaught
erl
yi
ngon
t
hepav
ementhel
plessl
y.OhnoMi
rai
s
goi
ngt
oki
l
lme!

“
Yeyni
namaanst
opr
unni
ngi
nthe
housewi
thy
ourmuddyshoes!
”Iscr
eam
att
het
opofmyl
ungsbutdot
heyl
i
sten,
Idon’
tknowwhyIst
il
lshoutatt
hem
becauset
heseki
dsnev
erl
i
sten.You
knowt
hatki
dsobser
veev
ery
thi
ngt
hat
i
shappeni
ngar
oundhomeandbehav
e
accor
dingl
y.Theycanseehowbadl
y
t
hei
rmomsandgr
andmot
herar
e
t
reat
inghencet
heyal
sodon’
trespect
me.I
’
mli
keaj
oket
othem because
ev
ery
timeIr
aisemyv
oiceatt
hem t
hey
gi
ggl
enonest
op.IknowIhav
etocl
ean
upt
hemuddyf
loorbutt
hepai
nisnot
gi
vi
ngmeabr
eaksi
ncef
rom l
astni
ght
ev
ent
houghi
twasn’
tint
ensel
i
kei
tis
r
ightnow.I
’
m 8mont
hspr
egnantnow
andI
’
m sohugebuti
tdoesn’
tmakeany
di
ff
erencet
othesepeopl
eIl
i
vewi
th.Al
l
t
heywantar
ethei
rcl
othescl
ean
i
ncl
udi
ngt
hei
runder
wear
s,t
hehouse
squeakycl
eanandf
oodt
oeat
,so
basi
cal
l
yI’
mthei
rmai
dbutnahamai
d
i
sbet
terI
’
m act
ual
l
ythei
rsl
aveandt
hey
don’
tev
enwantmet
ofi
ndaj
ob.Idon’
t
knowwhenIgi
vebi
rt
hhowam Igoi
ng
t
otakecar
eofmybabi
es.Ihav
e
managet
obuyf
ewcl
othesf
ort
hem
wi
tht
hemoneyImadef
rom sel
l
ingt
hat
pl
asmat
v.I
t’
sver
yhar
d,somet
imesI
f
eel
li
ket
aki
ngmyl
i
febutI
’
m notst
rong
enought
odot
hat
.Ihav
etr
iedt
oaskf
or
f
orgi
venessf
rom Soxbuthedoesn’
t
wantt
oheari
t,t
hatmanhat
esmeand
wor
sehedoesn’
twantt
otake
r
esponsi
bil
i
tyf
orhi
sbabi
esal
lhecar
es
abouti
sKamar
ia.Thewayhe’
sspoi
l
ing
t
hatki
dit
’sbr
eaksmyhear
tthatmyki
ds
wi
l
lnev
erex
per
iencet
hatf
rom t
hei
r
f
ather
.
“
Heyheyuhl
eli
dekephansi
udakal
olu
ol
ugcwel
eendl
i
nil
i
zoz
isul
a?”(
Youar
e
r
elax
ingdoy
out
hinkt
hemudont
he
f
loorwi
l
lremov
eit
sel
f)shout
ssi
s
Sebenz
il
e,i
stheel
destdaught
erofMr
s
Mkhwanaz
i
“
Cha”(
No)Isaywi
thal
owv
oice
“
Manj
euhl
elel
eni
getupandcl
eant
his
mess!
!”
“
I’
minpai
nsi
s…”
“
EhyIdi
dn’
tmakey
oupr
egnant
!!
Sukumasukuma!
!”(
Getup!Up!
!)si
s
Sebenz
il
eisacl
eaneratt
hehospi
tal
t
hensi
sDani
sil
eisav
endoratt
het
axi
r
ank.Idr
agmyhugesel
fupandgo
f
etcht
hebucketandmopt
ocl
eant
he
f
loor
.Thepai
nisget
ti
ngi
ntenseby
secondIscr
eam i
nagony
.Sebenz
il
e
appear
sandl
ooksatme.
“
What
?”
“
I’
minpai
n!”
“
Hai
sukawenay
ouar
ely
ingy
oudon’
t
wantt
ocl
ean!Uf
unaukuf
obel
akuphel
a
nj
e!!
”
“
Isweari
t’
sahhhh”Iscr
eam
“
Buty
ouar
e8mont
hsi
tcan’
tbet
hat
t
imeal
ready
.Comeandsi
tdown”
“
NoIcan’
tIneedt
ogot
othehospi
tal
I
..
.y
hooo!
!”
“
Okayokaybr
eat
he.
..
Iwi
l
lcal
lthe
ambul
ance”Byt
het
imet
heambul
ance
ar
ri
veI
’
m soweak.Il
osemy
consci
ousnessont
hewayt
othe
hospi
tal
.Mybodyf
eel
sheav
yandi
t’
s
achi
ng.Iopenmyheav
yey
esandl
ook
atmysur
roundi
ngs.I
’
m att
hehospi
tal
andIhav
eani
vdr
ipmyhear
tski
psa
beatasIt
ouchmyst
omach.
“
Mybabi
es!
”Thedoorswi
ngsopenand
t
hedoct
ormakesherwayi
n.
“
MissNcubey
ouar
eawake?
”
“
Wher
ear
emybabi
esdoct
or!
”
“
Cal
m downf
ir
stMi
ssNcube”
“
I’
m cal
m doct
or”Il
i
e
“
Ineedt
oasky
ouf
ewquest
ionsbut
y
ourbabi
esar
einNI
CU”Iex
pect
edt
hat
si
ncet
heyar
epr
emat
ure.
“
Whendi
dyoudi
scov
eredt
haty
ouar
e
car
ryi
ngt
wins?
”
“
Iwas7t
o8weekspr
egnant
”
“
Yourdoct
ornev
ersai
dany
thi
ng”
“
Noi
sthesomet
hingwr
ongdoct
or?
”
“
Ist
hisy
ourf
ir
stpr
egnancy
?”
“
Yes”
“
Hav
eyoubeeneat
ingheal
thy
,taki
ng
pr
enat
alv
itami
nsandgoi
ngf
orcheck
ups”Ishakemyheadno.
”
WhyMi
ssNcubedi
dn’
tyourdoct
ort
old
y
ou…”Icuthershor
t
“
Idon’
thav
eaper
sonal
doct
or,
I’
m
comi
ngf
rom apoorf
ami
l
yIdi
dn’
thav
e
moneyt
ogof
orcheckup”
“
Butatt
hecl
i
nic…”
“
WhenIwasgoi
ngt
ohav
eti
met
ogot
o
t
hecl
i
nict
hesepeopl
enev
ergav
eme
t
imet
orest
.I…”Ibur
sti
ntot
ear
s
“
I’
m sor
rydon’
tcr
y”shecomf
ort
sme
“
Docwher
ear
emybabi
es”
“
I’
m notsur
eyouar
ereadyt
oseet
hem”
“
Whatdoy
oumean?Pl
easet
akemet
o
t
hem”
“
MissNcube…”
“
Please!
”Shesi
ghs
“
Okayf
inebutwhaty
ouneedt
oknowi
s
t
haty
ourt
winsar
econj
oined”
“
Conj
oined?What
?”
“
Theyshar
ethebody
”Thi
sdoesn’
t
makesense
“
Idon’
tunder
stand”
“
Okaycome”shehel
pswi
thmyi
vdr
ip
t
henwewal
ktot
heNI
CU.Ishakemy
headv
igor
ousl
yasIl
aymyey
eson
t
hem,
thesear
enotmybabi
es.
“
Nononononooooooo!
”Il
etouta
hear
twr
enchi
ngcr
y
HappyBi
rt
hdayAl
i
naKeal
eboga
Mat
hopa&Babi
kiDntCar
eFi
fi
CHAPTER76(
unedi
ted)

Ir
unt
omydaught
erwho’
sly
ingont
he
pav
ementandpi
ckherup.I
’
mtr
yingt
o
wakeherupbutshe’
snotwaki
ngupI
canst
il
lfeel
herpul
set
hough.
“
Youasshol
ewhathav
eyoudonet
omy
daught
er!
”
“
I’
m sor
rymanIdi
dn’
tseeherI
..
”
“
Shutt
hef
uckup!
”Thewi
vesar
e
out
sidenowaski
ngwhat
’shappeni
ngI
t
hinkoneoft
heki
dst
oldt
hem what
happened.
“
Letmeseeher
”Zanesay
sandshe
checksherpul
se
“
Thepul
sei
sst
il
lther
ewehav
etor
ush
hert
othehospi
tal
”InasecondQhawe
i
sdr
ivi
ngust
othehospi
tal
andot
her
s
ar
efol
l
owi
ngbehi
ndus.
“
I’
m sor
rybabypl
easehangi
n
t
her
e..
.Daddyl
ovesy
ousomuch”Iki
ss
herl
i
psandhol
dhercl
osert
omyar
ms.
“
Becar
eful
howy
ouhol
dshemi
ghthav
e
br
okeherneck”Zanesay
sandmyhear
t
si
nkshear
ingt
hat
.
“
Nibangani
vel
enoMabut
ho”
“
He’
sanasshol
e!”
“
Mabut
hoakanal
onj
euchukuumenz
eni
wena?
”Ichuckl
e
“
Ohy
ouar
edef
endi
nghi
m Zanehuh?
”
“
Whathappened?
”
“
Doesi
tmat
tery
ouhav
eal
readychose
y
ourbr
other
’ssi
de!
!”
“
Mpendul
odon’
trai
sey
ourv
oiceatmy
wi
fe!I
fyouar
eusedt
otal
ki
ngshi
tto
peopl
eit
’sf
inebutmywi
fei
snogoar
ea
boy
.Iwi
l
lcuty
ourbal
l
smi
na!
!”These
ment
hinkI
’
m scar
edoft
hem.Upon
ar
ri
val
att
hehospi
tal
mydaught
eri
s
at
tended
“
Ifmydaught
eri
ssev
erel
yinj
uredIwi
l
l
ki
l
lyouMabut
ho!
”Ipushhi
m,ashe
aboutt
opunchmeSphel
i
lepul
l
shi
m
away
“
Str
ewber
ryev
ery
thi
ngpl
ease”
“
Thi
sboyi
sbul
l
shi
tt
ingmenj
unj
ubear
!”
“
Justcal
m downy
ouknowwheny
ou
angr
ywhathappens.Let
’swor
ryabout
Kamar
ianow”
“
Njunj
ubear
…”
“
PleaseShongol
oloI
’
m beggi
ngy
ou”He
l
ooksatherdeepi
ntheey
esandhi
s
ey
essof
tenupt
henhesi
tsdown.
“
Hav
eyoucal
l
edhermom”Qhaweasks
“
She’
spr
egnantshedoesn’
tneedt
his”
“
Shedeser
vest
oknow”
“
OkayIwi
l
lcal
lhermom”It
akemy
phoneandcal
lMr
sK.Ihopeshewon’
t
causedr
ama.Thatwomanhat
esmygut
andt
hiswi
l
lbeenoughf
orhert
otake
mydaught
erawayf
rom me.Idon’
tev
en
wantt
oment
ionMi
ra.Lor
dpl
easesav
e
mydaught
ershe’
stheonl
ythi
ngt
hat
makesanysenser
ightnow.Ipr
omi
set
o
dobet
terandbeagoodmananda
f
ather
.

Lor
dispuni
shi
ngmef
orev
eryev
ildeed
Ihav
eev
erdonei
nmyl
i
feespeci
all
yfor
f
aki
ngKamar
ia’
sDNAr
esul
ts.Thi
s
coul
dbet
heonl
yreasonIgav
ebi
rt
hto
conj
oinedt
wins.Whent
hedoct
ort
old
met
hatt
heyar
econj
oinedIdi
dn’
tknow
whatshemeantunt
ilIsawmyboy
sin
onebody
.Say
ingi
t’
sbr
eaki
ngmyhear
t
t
hatwoul
dbeanunder
stat
ement
.They
don’
tdeser
vet
hisandIcan’
tev
enbegi
n
t
oimagi
nehowwoul
dtheyl
i
vej
oined
l
i
ket
his.Howam Iev
engoi
ngt
otake
car
eoft
hem?I
’
m bey
ondbr
okenand
I
’
m scar
ed.Iwal
kcl
osert
othem butI
’
m
af
rai
dtoev
ent
oucht
hem.Theyar
e
mal
nour
ishedandpal
etheot
herar
mis
ev
engr
een,
theyl
ookl
i
ket
heyi
nso
muchpai
n.
“
Youar
eluckyt
ogi
vebi
rt
htot
hem.
Conj
oinedt
winsusual
l
ytheyar
e
st
il
lbor
nordi
eshor
tl
yaf
terbi
rt
h…”
“
Soy
ousay
ingt
heywi
l
ldi
e?Ther
emust
besomet
hingy
oucandodocpl
ease
sav
emybabi
es.Can’
ttheybesepar
ated
orsomet
hingpl
ease”Icr
y
“
I’
m sor
ryMi
ssNcubet
heycantbe
separ
atedbecauset
heyshar
eal
most
ev
eryor
gansex
cepthear
ts,
lungsand
ki
dney
s”
“
No!
”
“
I’
m sor
ryMi
ssy
ouar
etooy
oungt
obe
goi
ngt
hrought
his…”
“
Sot
heywi
l
ldi
e”
“
May
bewecantbesur
e.Abi
gai
land
Br
it
tanyHensel
sur
viv
edt
heywer
ebor
n
i
n1990st
il
ltodayt
heyal
i
veandl
i
ving
t
hei
rli
veshappi
l
y”
“
Idon’
twantt
hem t
oli
vel
i
ket
hisdoct
or
t
hisi
stoopai
nful
.Peopl
ewi
l
lal
way
s
l
ookatt
hem di
ff
erent
”
“
Iunder
standMi
ssNcubeandI
’
m sor
ry
t
hatIdon’
thav
esol
uti
onsf
ory
ou”she
pul
l
smet
oherar
msandcomf
ort
sme.
“
Pleasedon’
tcr
yGodi
saGodof
mi
racl
es”
“
Doct
oram Iwr
ongt
othi
nkr
athert
hey
di
ethengr
owupl
i
ket
his?
”
“
Noofcour
senotIunder
standy
our
f
ear
s.Thi
sist
hemostt
raumat
ic
ex
per
ienceamot
herhast
ogot
hrough.
I
’
mreal
l
ysor
ryonceagai
n”
“
Cany
oubor
rowmey
ourphonepl
easeI
needt
oinf
ormt
hei
rfat
herhedoesn’
t
knowIgav
ebi
rt
h”
“
It
’si
nmyof
fi
cebutIcangogeti
t”
“
Thanky
ou”shewal
ksoutl
eav
ingme
wi
thmybabi
es.
“
I’
m sor
rymybabi
esmommyi
ssososo
sor
ry”Ibur
sti
ntot
ear
s.

I
fyout
hinky
ouhav
ebeenembar
rassed
bef
oret
rustmei
t’
snot
hingcompar
edt
o
bei
ngcaughthav
ingsexbyy
ourpar
ent
s
asmuchasy
ouknowt
heyknowt
hat
y
ouar
esex
ual
act
iveandmypr
egnancy
i
senoughpr
oofbutr
ightnowIwi
sht
his
st
oveI
’
m si
tt
ingoncanbur
nmei
nto
asheswi
thi
nasecond.Ther
e’sawkwar
d
t
ensi
oni
nther
oom andt
heyar
eroot
ed
ont
hei
rspot
“
Shi
t!
”Lwenkosi
say
sunderhi
sbr
eat
h
andhe’
sbur
ieddeepi
ntome
embar
rassedt
oev
enmov
e.
“
Uhm uhcomesnookums”Daddysay
s
andt
akesmom t
othel
i
vingr
oom who’
s
numb.Lwenkosi
andIl
ookateachot
her
andgi
ggl
e.
“
Yousai
dyourmom i
sont
hewayt
o
Dur
banbaby
”Hepul
l
southi
sdr
enched
cock.
“
Thatwhatshet
oldmei
nthemor
ning”
Hewi
pesmewi
thhi
shandker
chi
ef
whi
chwasi
nhi
spant
sandwi
pes
hi
msel
f.
“
Godt
hatwassoawkwar
d”
“
Tel
lmeabouti
t”Heput
smedownt
he
st
oveandhel
pmewearmypant
ies.
“
Didy
ouseey
ourmom’
sface.I
’
m
l
eav
ingmi
naIdon’
twantt
odi
e”
“
Hawubabyy
ouar
egoi
ngt
oleav
eme
f
acet
hoset
wo”
“
Theyar
eyourpar
ent
sI’
m sur
eyoucan
deal
wit
hthem”
“
BabycomeonI
…”Heshutmeupwi
tha
ki
sst
hengr
abhi
scarkey
sont
he
count
erandl
eav
e.Okayj
ustl
i
ket
hat
he’
sgoneandl
eftmet
odeal
wit
hthese
t
wo.He’
ssounf
airwhathappenedt
o
I
’
ddi
ewher
eyoudi
ebabymx
m.Ideci
de
t
hatI
’
m notgoi
ngt
ofacet
hem nowsoI
makemywayt
omybedr
oom.Thi
sis
oneoft
her
easonsIwant
edt
ost
ay
al
oneandhav
emyownspace.Ican’
t
hav
emypar
ent
swal
ki
ngusonmeand
myf
iancéhav
ingsexi
t’
sreal
l
y
embar
rassi
ng.Ihopemom i
snotangr
y
cozr
eal
l
yit
’snotmyf
aul
ttheyhad
changeofpl
ans.Idon’
tknowhowam I
goi
ngt
olookt
hem i
ntheey
esespeci
all
y
daddy
.I’
m nev
ercomi
ngoutoft
his
bedr
oom y
ho!Il
ockmybedr
oom and
cr
awl
onbedt
ocompl
etewi
thwhatwe
hav
est
art
edusi
ngmyhand.JustasI
’
m
ov
ert
heedget
her
e’saknockont
he
doorohmygodt
hesepeopl
edon’
twant
met
ohav
emyor
gasm wi
thpeace!If
eel
l
i
kebur
sti
ngi
ntot
ear
sri
ghtnow.
“
Mir
aopenup”i
t’
smom.Idr
agmy
sel
f
upandopent
hedoorf
orheraf
ter
wi
pingmyhandwi
thmyt
owel
.I’
m not
l
ooki
ngatherasIopent
hedoor
.She
makesherwayi
naf
terIhav
emadea
spacef
orher
.Icl
oset
hedoorandwai
t
f
orhert
oyel
latme.
“
Inaki
tchenr
eal
l
yMi
ra?
”Shesay
s
r
athercal
mly
“
Ithoughty
ouwentt
oDur
ban”Isay
l
ooki
ngdown
“
Whet
herIwentt
oDur
banornoti
t
doesn’
tchanget
hef
actt
haty
ouand
Lwandl
ewer
efucki
ngi
ntheki
tchen
wher
ewecookf
oodt
hatweeat
!”Iknow
t
hatsheanddadar
eal
sof
ucki
ngi
nthe
ki
tcheni
nDur
banuz
enz
ajui
cyngami
nj
e.Igi
veheral
ook,
shesi
ghsandl
ooks
atme
“
LookIunder
standy
ouar
eengaged
soont
obemar
ri
edbutI
’
myourmot
herI
don’
twantt
oseehownast
yyoucanbe.
Thati
sourki
tchennoty
our
s,t
hati
sour
st
ovewher
eyouwer
esi
tt
ingwi
thy
our
bar
ebut
toni
twhi
l
eLwandl
ewas
pumpi
ngi
ntoy
ounoty
our
s.HowcanI
makef
oodf
orKont
hatst
ovei
nthat
ki
tchenaf
terwhathesaw?
”
“
Iwasn’
tsi
tt
ingonmybar
ebut
tmom
butonmydr
ess”
“
Whatdi
ff
erencedoesi
tmakeMi
ra!
”
Okaynowwear
erai
singt
hev
oice.
“
Youwi
l
ldot
hoset
hingsi
nyourhouse
nother
e!Thi
sisourhomewhi
chmeans
y
ouguy
shav
etor
espectourspace!No
mor
esexher
ear
ewecl
ear
?”
“
Cry
stal
clear
”
“
Good”sheswi
vel
aroundandwal
ksout
.
Sot
hatwaswhatIwasdi
stur
bedf
or
mx
m somewomenwantt
obet
heonl
y
onest
ohav
emi
ndbl
owi
ngor
gasm.I
mi
ssmydaught
ernowev
ent
houghshe
t
easemewi
thmybi
gnose.Kamar
iai
s
sav
ageI
’
mtel
l
ingy
oushesay
smynose
i
sbi
gngat
hii
khal
aleguz
ulephoy
isaand
i
tdoesn’
tev
enbot
herherwhenIcr
y.I
n
f
actmyt
ear
sti
ckl
esher
.Myphonei
sin
t
hel
oungehowam Igoi
ngt
ogot
her
e
andgocal
lMpendul
o.Letmej
ustsl
eep
Imi
ghtwakeupwhendaddyi
sgone.He
nev
ersl
eepsher
etheyusual
l
ygosl
eep
i
nhehot
elt
oget
her
.Thedoorbur
st
openi
nthatmoment
“
Mom what
’sgoi
ngon”
“
Wehav
etogot
othehospi
tal
”
“
Hospi
tal
..
what
’swr
ong?
”
“
Kamar
ia.
..
Soxdi
dn’
tex
plai
nedbut
Kamar
iai
shur
t!
”myhear
tsi
nks.I
’
m
t
hinki
ngoft
hewor
stscenar
iost
hat
coul
dhav
ehappenedt
omybaby
.
“
Mir
apl
easeIneedy
our
ightnowt
o
r
elaxI
’
m sur
eit
’snott
hatbadokay
”I
nodwi
thmyhead
“
Nowl
et’
sgo”Wer
ushoutandf
inddad
al
readyi
nthecar
.Igr
eethi
m andhe
gr
eetmebackl
ooki
ngatmeont
her
ear
mi
rr
or.I
’
mtooscar
edt
obewor
ryi
ng
abouthi
mri
ghtnowmydaught
eri
sthe
onl
ythi
ngonmymi
ndnow.Iwonder
whathappened.
“
Breat
heandr
elaxokay
”mymom say
s
br
ushi
ngmyback.Wear
eaboutt
o
enqui
rewhenIseeMpendul
owhohas
br
uisesonhi
sface.Iconcl
udet
hatt
hey
hadanacci
dent
.Ohmypoorbaby
.
“
Mir
a”
“
Mpendul
ouphi
umt
anami
?”(
Wher
e’s
mybaby
)
“
Greet
ings.
..
Theyt
ookhert
oERt
hey
hav
en’
tcomebackt
ogi
veusf
eed
back.
”
“
Whathappened?
”
“
Comeandj
oinot
her
s”Het
akesmy
handandwewal
ktowher
ehi
sfami
l
yis
i
nthewai
ti
ngar
ea.Hei
ntr
oducesusi
t’
s
t
urnsoutmom knowshi
scousi
n’
swi
fe
andhert
winsi
ster
.
“
Whathappenedt
omygr
anddaught
er
Mr
sXul
u”
“
Umm”
“
It
’shi
sfaul
t!
”Mpendul
osay
spoi
nti
ng
atMrBhengu
“
Itwasn’
tmyi
ntent
iont
ohur
tthechi
l
d
I
’
mreal
l
ysor
ry”
“
Canany
onet
ell
uswhathappenedt
o
mygr
anddaught
erf
ir
st”Dadsay
s
l
ooki
ngatt
hem wi
thani
nti
midat
ing
l
ook.
“
Uhm si
r…”
“
MrMsi
mango”Dadcut
sMpendul
o’s
cousi
nof
f
“
MrMsi
mangof
ir
stI
’
dli
ket
oapol
ogi
ze
t
hatwemeetl
i
ket
his.Mpendul
oand
Mabut
hower
efi
ght
ingandKamar
iawas
t
ryi
ngt
ost
opMabut
hof
rom hi
tt
ingher
f
atherobl
i
vioust
othedangershewas
put
ti
ngher
sel
fin.Mabut
hoacci
dent
all
y
ki
ckedher,
shef
lewandf
all
ont
he
pav
ement
”Imagi
ningwhatt
hismanj
ust
sai
dcr
ushesmyhear
tint
opi
eces.
“
Howwasshewheny
oubr
oughther
her
e?Wasshei
npai
n?WhatIam
say
ingofcour
seshewasi
npai
n!”I
bur
sti
ntot
ear
s
“
Shewasunconsci
ouswhenwebr
ought
her
e”ohnowhati
fshenev
erwakesup
“
I’
m sor
ryMi
raIdi
dn’
tmeanany
thi
ngt
o
happent
oourdaught
erpl
easedon’
tcr
y
shewi
l
lbeokay
”Heat
tempt
stohol
d
mebutIpushhi
m.Howdar
ehef
ighti
n
ourdaught
er’
spr
esence!
“
Nisanganey
ini
emakhandani
ngal
wa
phambi
kwengane!
!”(
Arey
ousi
cki
n
y
ourheadshowcany
ouf
ighti
nfr
ontof
achi
l
d!!
)Dadshout
s
“
I’
m sor
ryMrMsi
mangoIdi
dn’
tmeant
o
hur
tthechi
l
d…”
“
Youwer
enotsupposedt
ofi
ghti
nfr
ont
ofherf
rom t
hef
ir
stpl
acedammi
t!
!”
“
I’
m sor
ry…”
“
Fuckof
fmaan!Looknowy
ouar
egi
vi
ng
mydaught
erunnecessar
yst
ressshe’
s
pr
egnantf
orcr
yingoutl
oudshedoesn’
t
needt
his!
!”I
’
m pr
essedagai
nstmy
mom’
schestandherar
msar
ewr
apped
ar
oundme.
“
Wedeepl
yapol
ogi
zesi
r.
”MrXul
usay
s.
Hi
swi
fecomest
osi
tnex
ttome
“
Cal
m downsi
syourdaught
erwi
l
lbe
f
ine.
”Howdoessheknowt
hatmy
daught
erwaski
ckedbyamant
hat
al
onei
stoomuchhowmuchmor
e
f
all
i
ngont
hepav
ement
.
“
Mom cany
oupl
easebor
rowmey
our
phone”Ipul
lbackf
rom herembr
aceand
t
akeherphonet
ocal
lLwenkosi
,
i
nfor
minghi
m aboutt
hesi
tuat
ionat
hand.
“
I’
m onmywayst
handwasami
okay
”He
hangsup.Thewai
tiski
l
li
ngme,
Iwant
t
oseemydaught
er.
“
Doy
ouwantany
thi
ng”Dadasks.I
shakemyheadno.mi
nut
esl
atemy
f
iancémakehi
swayi
n.
Igetupandt
hrowmy
sel
finhi
sar
ms.
Hecat
chesmeandhol
dsmet
ight
ly.
“
It
’sokaybabyI
’
m her
enow.She’
l
lbe
okay
”Hegr
eet
sev
ery
onet
henwebot
h
si
tdown.
“
Xul
uKamar
ia”Thedoct
orsay
sandwe
al
lgetup.Hel
ooksatus
“
I’
m herf
athert
heyar
eal
lfami
l
ydoct
or”
Mpendul
osay
s
“
How’
smydaught
erdoct
or?
”
“
She’
sgoi
ngt
obef
ineshesust
aineda
mi
l
dskul
lfr
act
ureofwhi
chwi
l
lbe
heal
edbymedi
cat
ion.Ther
e’snoneed
f
orsur
ger
ysoIwi
l
lkeepherf
or
obser
vat
ionf
orf
ewday
sunt
ilI
’
m sur
e
t
hatshe’
sokaybuty
ouhav
enot
hingt
o
wor
ryaboutshewi
l
lbef
ine.
”Ibr
eat
hea
si
ghofr
eli
ef.
“
Thanky
ourancest
orsbecauseIwasso
goi
ngt
oki
l
lyoui
fthewor
sthappenedt
o
her
!”Mpendul
osay
stoMabut
ho.
“
Mxm!
”Mabut
hosay
sandwal
ksout
f
oll
owedbyhi
shusband.
“
CanIseeher
”Iask
“
Met
oopl
ease”Mpendul
osay
s
“
Icanonl
yal
l
owy
ouguy
stogoi
nint
o
pai
rs”If
oll
owt
hedoct
orashel
eads
my
sel
fandMpendul
otomydaught
er.I
nev
eri
magi
nedmydaught
erl
yi
ngont
he
hospi
tal
bed.I
t’
sjustpai
nsmyhear
t
ev
ent
houghIknowt
hatshewi
l
lbeokay
,
she’
ssl
eepi
ngpeacef
ull
y.
“
Heypumpki
nit
smommy
”Iki
ssherl
i
ps
andhol
dhersmal
lhandt
hathas
i
siphandl
a.Sheuset
ocompl
ainal
ot
abouti
tsunpl
easantsmel
lwheni
t’
swas
st
il
lnew.Heri
mbel
ekocer
emonywasa
mont
hbackandIwasn’
tther
ebecause
shewasal
readyusedt
oherf
ather
.
“
I’
m sosor
ryMi
ra”
“
Pleasedon’
tMpendul
o”
“
I’
mtr
yingt
oapol
ogi
zeher
e…”
“
Idon’
twanty
ourapol
ogyt
hewor
st
coul
dhav
ehappenedt
omybaby
Mpendul
ohowcany
ouf
ighti
nfr
ontof
her
?Ev
eni
fshedi
dn’
tgethur
thowdoes
shef
eel
aft
erseei
ngherf
atherbei
ng
beat
enup?
”
“
Ngenz
eiphut
hamt
wanaandI
’
m sor
ry”
“
Mxm!
”Hecomest
omysi
deandmake
mesi
tdownt
hencr
ouchi
nfr
ontofme
“
Im sor
ryokayy
ouknowhowIl
oveour
daught
erandIwi
l
lnev
erhur
ther
i
ntent
ional
l
ypl
easef
orgi
veme”
“
What
everSox
...
whywer
eyouf
ight
ing
v
ele”
“
Thatmdi
dieat
erwaspoki
nghi
snosei
n
mybusi
ness”Ichuckl
eandt
ouchhi
s
swol
l
encheekbone.
“
Doesi
thur
t?”
“
Yes”Hegr
imaces
“
I’
m sor
rybutst
opf
ight
ingpl
ease.I
don’
twantany
thi
ngt
ohappent
oyou
Mpendul
oyouar
ethef
atherofmy
daught
er.I
fyougethur
tthenmy
daught
erwi
l
lbehur
ttoo.Pl
ease
what
every
oudobeari
nyourmi
ndt
hat
y
ouhav
eadaught
er”
“
Ithoughty
ougoi
ngt
osaybecausey
ou
car
eaboutmeandy
oul
ovemebuti
t’
s
f
ine.Iheary
ouandIpr
omi
seIwi
l
l
al
way
sputmydaught
er.
…”Hi
sphone
cut
shi
m of
fmi
dsent
ence.Heunl
ocksi
t
andv
iewaWhat
sAppmessage.Isee
hi
shandt
hati
scar
ryi
nghi
sphone
shaki
ngt
err
ibl
y.
“
Mpendul
oar
eyouokay
?”Hei
snot
r
epl
yi
ngbutshaki
nghi
sheadv
igor
ousl
y
whi
l
ehi
sey
esar
est
il
lonhi
sphone.I
t
akehi
sphoneandl
ookati
t.Ohmy
wor
ldI
t’
sapi
ctur
eofbabi
est
hathas
t
woheadandonebody
.‘Ihopey
ouar
e
sat
isf
iednowt
hatt
heyar
eyour
sthey
ev
enl
ookl
i
key
ou.Fr
om Gugu’
“
Mpe.
..
wasGugupr
egnant
?”Henods
hi
shead
“
Andt
hesear
eyourt
wins?
”
“
Ithoughtt
heyar
enotmi
neMi
ra
she.
.shecheat
edonmewi
thmyuncl
e
andI
..
.ohGodt
heyar
emi
neandt
hey
ar
eco.
..
co.
.conj
oined.
”Iseet
ear
sfal
l
ing
downonhi
sface.Iswal
l
owhar
dIdon’
t
ev
enknowwhatt
osay
.Whatdoy
ousay
t
osomeonewhoj
ustf
indouthehas
conj
oinedt
wins.I
sitcongr
atul
ati
onsor
I
’
m sor
ry?
“
Shet
oldmeMi
rabutIdi
dn’
tbel
i
eveher
.
HowcanIbesocr
uel
!May
bei
fIwas
t
her
efort
hei
rmot
hert
heywoul
dn’
thav
e
beenl
i
ket
his”Hewai
l
sli
keababyand
t
hisi
smyf
ir
stt
imewi
tnessi
nghi
m
cr
ying.Ipul
lhi
m cl
oseher
est
shi
shead
onmybi
gtummy
.If
eel
sor
ryf
orhi
m
andIf
eel
mor
esor
ryf
orGugu.Ican’
t
begi
ntoi
magi
nehowt
raumat
ici
tist
o
gi
vebi
rt
htosuchbabi
es.
“
Don’
tbl
amey
our
sel
fforsomet
hingy
ou
hav
enocont
rol
of.Ibel
i
eveev
eni
fyou
wer
ether
etheywer
est
il
lgoi
ngt
obe
conj
oined”
“
Shet
oldmeshehasnomoneyf
or
checkupsandf
oodmay
bei
twoul
d
hav
ebeendet
ect
edear
li
erandt
hey
woul
dhav
edonesomet
hingt
osepar
ate
t
hem”
“
OhMpendul
ohowcoul
dyout
urny
our
backony
ourki
dswi
thoutmaki
ngsur
e
t
heyar
eyour
s?DNAcanbedonenow
whi
l
eyouar
est
il
lpr
egnantandi
t’
sno
l
ongerr
isky
”
“
Iwasst
upi
dandangr
y!Idi
dn’
twant
any
thi
ngt
hatgott
odowi
thherIhat
ed
herf
orwhatshedi
d!Ial
l
owedmy
emot
ionst
ogett
hebet
terofme.
”
“
I’
m sosor
ryMpendul
o”
“
WhatdoIdomakunj
eMi
ra”
“
Got
ohershowhersuppor
tsheneed
y
ounowmor
ethenev
er.Putev
ery
thi
ng
shedi
dtousasi
def
orasecondandbe
t
her
eforher
.Iknowt
hatshewi
l
lnotbe
wel
comi
ngaf
ternegl
ect
ingheral
lal
one
wi
thapr
egnancybutdon’
tgi
veup.
Theseki
dsneedy
oubot
hst
rong.
”
“
I’
m soscar
edt
oev
enseet
hem”
“
It
’sunder
standabl
ebutt
hesebabi
es
ar
eyour
s.Theyneedt
hei
rfat
her
”my
dr
essi
sdampnowwi
thhi
stear
s.
“
Youneedacounsel
i
ngMpendul
o…”He
cut
smeof
f
“
Counsel
i
ngf
orwhatIdon’
tneeda
shr
ink.I
’
m amant
hosear
ewomen
st
uff
”
“
That
’snott
ruecounsel
i
ngi
sfor
ev
ery
onewhohasi
ssuesandneed
heal
i
ng”
“
Idon’
thav
eissuesandIdon’
tneed
heal
i
ng.I
’
m okay
!”
“
Youhav
ebeenbot
tl
inguppai
nand
angeranddur
ingt
hatpr
ocessy
ouar
e
l
osi
ngy
our
sel
f.Youhav
eshor
ttemper
andy
oumakei
rr
ati
onal
deci
sions
becauseoft
heangerandpai
ninsi
deof
y
ou…”Hepul
l
sbackandl
ooksatme
wi
thsomuchanger
“
Shutup!
”
“
NoIwon’
tshutup,
youar
eangr
yat
y
our
sel
fthaty
ourt
winbr
othert
ooky
our
bul
l
et,
youar
eangr
yaty
ourmom f
or
l
yi
ngt
oyouandmadey
oubel
i
evey
our
f
atheri
stheonet
hatnegl
ect
edy
ouguy
s,
y
ouar
eangr
yyourf
atherdi
edwi
thout
get
ti
ngachancet
ofeel
fat
her
lyl
ove,
y
ouar
eangr
yatmef
ornotl
ovi
ngy
ou
backt
hewayy
oul
oveme,
youar
eangr
y
atLwandl
efort
aki
ngmeawayf
rom y
ou,
y
ouar
eangr
yatGuguf
orcheat
ingon
y
ouwi
thy
ouruncl
e,y
ouar
eangr
yat
Guguf
orf
aki
ngKamar
ia’
sDNAr
esul
ts,
y
ouar
eangr
ythaty
oushout
edat
Kamar
iaaf
terGugut
emper
edwi
tht
he
r
esul
ts.Youar
eangr
yyousl
appedme”
“
Shutt
hef
uckupMi
ra!
”
“
Youar
eangr
ynowt
haty
ounegl
ect
ed
y
ourbabi
esandt
hatt
heyar
ecoj
oined.
Youar
eangr
yatt
hewor
ld.Youf
eel
li
ke
i
t’
sunf
airony
ouIagr
eewi
thy
oui
t’
s
unf
airbuti
t’
sunf
airt
oal
lofusal
though
someoft
her
easonsf
ory
ourangerand
pai
nar
ecausedbyy
ourdeci
sions.I
don’
tknowi
fImakesense.WhatI
’
m
t
ryi
ngt
osayy
oual
l
owy
ourangert
o
t
akecont
rol
ofl
i
fe.Mostoft
he
deci
sionsy
out
akel
atel
yar
ethr
ough
anger
.Youknewt
hatt
her
e’sa
possi
bil
i
tyt
hatGugumi
ghtbecar
ryi
ng
y
ourbabi
esbutbecausey
ou’
reangr
yat
whatshedi
dbot
hsl
eepi
ngwi
thy
our
uncl
eandf
aki
ngr
esul
tsy
out
hrewher
outi
nthest
reet
.Youknewwheny
ou
wer
efi
ght
ingt
hatKamar
iai
sar
ound
andcoul
dseey
oubuty
oual
l
owed
angert
ocont
rol
youandf
oughti
nfr
ont
ofher
.Youf
eel
li
ket
hewor
ldhast
urned
agai
nsty
ouandl
efty
oul
onel
y.Youcut
y
ourmom of
fyeswhatshedi
dwas
wr
ongbuty
oucan’
tkeepcut
ti
ngev
ery
si
ngl
eper
soni
nyourl
i
feMpendul
oyou
wi
l
lendupal
one.Akumnandi
ukuba
wedwa,
tel
lmeam Il
yi
ng?
”Heshakes
hi
sheadno.
“
Youneedt
odeal
wit
hyouri
ssues
Mpendul
odoi
tforKamar
iaandy
our
t
wins.Iknowdeepi
nsi
deofy
out
her
e’s
t
hisgent
legoodmanbutnowhe’
s
ov
erpower
edbyt
heangerandpai
n
i
nsi
deofy
out
haty
ouneedt
orel
ease”
“
Stopi
tpl
ease”Hi
stear
sar
est
reami
ng
downhi
sface.Iwi
pehi
stear
sandcup
hi
sface
“
Showi
ngy
ouremot
ionsdoesn’
tmake
y
ouweakbutar
eal
manwhogotcont
rol
ofhi
sfeel
i
ngs.Bot
tl
inguppai
nand
angeri
sdanger
ousbecausey
ouendup
l
osi
ngy
our
sel
f.I
t’
sti
mey
oul
eti
tgo
Dl
ami
nisot
haty
oucanhav
einner
peaceandbet
hebestf
athery
ouwant
t
obet
oyourchi
l
dren”
“
Theny
ouwonderwhyIwanty
out
obe
mywi
fe.
”Il
etgotofhi
sfaceand
r
emov
emygaz
efr
om hi
sey
est
hatar
e
st
ari
ngmei
ntensel
y.Ihat
ehowgui
l
tyI
f
eel
ever
yti
mehet
ell
smehel
ovesme
“
Uhm got
othet
winsKamar
iawi
l
lbe
okay
”
“
Yousur
e?”Inod.Heki
ssesmy
f
oreheadandget
supt
henwal
ksout
af
terki
ssi
ngKamar
ia.That
’swhenwe
seeLwenkosi
hasbeenst
andi
ngont
he
door
.Hel
ooksatmei
ntheey
esashe
wal
kscl
oser
.
“
Ibi
zwangani
lent
ooy
enz
ayo?
”(Whatdo
y
oucal
lwhatdoi
ng?
)
“
What
?”
“
Musaukungenz
aisl
i
ma!
”
“
Don’
trai
sey
ourv
oiceKamar
iai
s
sl
eepi
ng”
“
Youl
ovehi
m?”
“
Howcoul
dyouaskmet
hat
?”
“
Youl
ovehi
myesorno?
”
“
Real
l
yLwandl
elwenkosi
”
“
Doy
oul
ovehi
myesorno?
”
“
Wher
eist
hiscomi
ngf
rom Lwenkosi
?”
“
It
’scomi
ngf
rom y
oucomf
ort
ing
anot
herman,
wipi
nghi
stear
swi
thy
our
hands,
all
owi
nghi
mtor
esthi
scr
ippl
ed
bi
gheadonmybabyandpl
ayi
ng
psy
chol
ogi
stt
ohi
m!”
“
Iwasj
ustbei
ngasuppor
ti
ve.
..
”
“
Don’
tpat
roni
zemeMi
ra!Di
dn’
tyout
wo
st
art
edbycomf
ort
ingeahot
herwhen
y
oumadeKamar
ianx
!”Hewal
ksout
howcoul
dhesayt
hat
?Icr
yfor
Lwenkosi
breaki
ngmyhear
twi
thhi
s
r
eact
ion,
Icr
yforGuguandhert
wins,
I
cr
yfort
hepai
nshecausedme,
Icr
yfor
t
hel
oveMpendul
ohasf
ormet
hatI
can’
treci
procat
e.Icr
yformyboywhati
f
het
urnsoutt
ohav
edi
sabi
l
ityt
ool
i
ke
Gugu’
stwi
nsorl
i
kemesi
nceIwasbor
n
bl
i
nd.Whati
fhenev
ermakesi
t?What
i
f.
..
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayLi
ndi
swa
BhonnyMat
hol
eQakaz
a,Nunu
Mant
utu,
RenéJacobs&Mbal
l
yMa-
zul
u

CHAPTER77(
unedi
ted)

I
t’
str
uet
haty
ouwon’
tunder
standa
si
tuat
ioni
fyouhav
enev
erbeent
her
e
bef
ore.Iwasdi
sappoi
ntedt
heway
daddyhandl
edt
hingsaboutZi
khal
isaga
butwhenmom endedt
hei
rrel
ati
onshi
pI
t
houghtshewasabi
tex
agger
ati
ngI
under
standwhatshemeant
.Ican’
t
bel
i
evet
hatnex
tmont
hwear
eget
ti
ng
mar
ri
edbuthedoesn’
ttr
ustmet
hat
br
eaksmyhear
tev
enmor
e.Tr
usti
sone
oft
hemosti
mpor
tantel
ement
stokeep
ar
elat
ionshi
pont
rack.I
fIl
ove
Mpendul
oIwoul
dbewi
thhi
mri
ghtnow.
Thi
sisnott
hef
ir
stt
imeMpendul
o
conf
essi
nghi
sfeel
i
ngsf
ormei
fIl
ove
hi
m Iwoul
dn’
tspentmyday
sinKeny
a
t
hinki
ngaboutLwenkosi
aft
erwhathe
di
dtomeespeci
all
yaf
terIdi
scov
ered
t
hatMpendul
oandIhav
eadaught
er
t
oget
her
.Ibel
i
evei
fyouar
est
il
lbr
ingi
ng
upt
hepasti
t’
smeansy
ouar
enotov
eri
t,
cl
ear
lyt
hatmeanshenev
erf
orgav
eme
andhonest
lyspeaki
ngIdi
dn’
tcheaton
hi
m,Iendedt
hingswi
thhi
m af
ter
di
scov
eri
ngt
hati
twasal
lanact
.Hehas
nor
ightt
oactl
i
keIcheat
edonhi
m,I
admi
tIhur
thi
m butcheat
ingnahmz
ala.
“
Baby
”mom say
sandIwi
pemyt
ear
s
qui
ckl
yIcan’
thav
eherwor
ryi
ngabout
me.
“
Thedoct
orsai
dshewi
l
lbef
inedon’
t
cr
ypl
easey
ouar
est
ressi
ngy
our
sel
f
andt
hat
’snotgoodf
ort
hebaby
”She
si
tsont
hebedf
aci
ngme.
“
I’
mfi
nemom”
“
Tal
ktome”
“
Andsaywhat
?”
“
Ibumpedi
ntoLwandl
elooki
ngpi
ssed
of
fandIf
oundy
oucr
ying.Icanseei
t’
s
mor
ethenj
ustKam Kam bei
ngher
e”
“
It
’snot
hing”Isaybutmyt
ear
sar
e
bet
ray
ingme,
theyf
all
eff
ort
lessl
yonmy
cheeks.
“
Mir
acl
ewhat
’swr
ong”Theconcer
nin
herv
oicei
sloudIguessshe’
sov
ert
he
sexi
ntheki
tcheni
nci
dent
“
Iunder
standhowy
ouf
eltwhendaddy
di
dn’
ttr
usty
ouaboutZi
khal
isaga”I
wi
pemyt
ear
svi
gor
ousl
y
“
Whathappened?
”Iex
plai
ntoher
bet
weensobs
“
OhbabyI
’
m sosor
rybutIunder
stand
hi
sreact
ion”Il
ookather
“
Real
l
ymama”
“
List
enMi
ra…y
ouandSoxhav
eachi
l
d
t
oget
herandi
t’
sdoesn’
thel
pthathest
il
l
want
syou.I
fitwasot
herwayar
ound
howy
ouwoul
dhav
efel
tseei
nghi
m
comf
ort
inghi
sbabymama”
“
SowhatIwassupposedt
odomama
wat
chhi
m cr
yinf
rontofmeandnot
comf
orthi
m becauseLwenkosi
doesn’
t
t
rustmet
hatIwoul
dnev
ercheatonhi
m.
I
t’
snotl
i
keLwenkosi
foundmeki
ssi
ng
Mpendul
ounl
i
kehi
m whowas
ex
changi
ngspi
twi
thNosbutbecauseI
t
rusthi
m If
orgav
ehi
m andbel
i
eved
hi
m.”
“
Pleaseanswermef
ir
sthowy
ouwoul
d
hav
efel
t?”
“
I’
dgi
vehi
m achancet
oex
plai
nnot
accusehi
m ofl
ovi
ngherbecauset
hat
wi
l
lmeanIdon’
ttr
usthi
m”
“
Heaskedy
oumosi
fyoul
ovehi
m and
y
oudi
dn’
trepl
y”
“
BecauseIf
eltt
hatwasani
nsul
tmama
howdar
eheaskmet
hat
?Wear
e
get
ti
ngmar
ri
ednex
tmont
hforcr
ying
outl
oudbuthest
il
ldoubtmyl
ovef
or
hi
m!”
“
Heycal
m downpl
ease.
..
takeahuge
br
eat
hei
nandout
”Ibr
eat
hei
nandout
l
i
keshesai
d
“
Lal
elamenhandl
etheset
hings
di
ff
erent
lyt
henwomen.I
tal
way
seasy
f
orust
ounder
standandf
orgi
vet
hem
wher
east
heyf
indi
thar
dtodot
hesame.
Li
keIsai
dyouandSoxhav
eahi
stor
y
Mi
ra,
andSoxi
snotwi
l
li
ngt
olety
ougo.
Hest
il
lwant
syouLwandl
eisscar
ed
t
hathewi
l
llosey
out
ohi
m.Yout
wo
needt
osi
tdownandt
alkaboutt
his,
a
l
i
neneedt
obedr
awny
ouar
e
someone’
sfi
ancéesoont
obewi
fey
ou
can’
tbewi
pinganot
herman’
stear
slet
al
oney
ourbabydaddy
.It
’sdoesn’
tlook
r
ightbabyangi
funi
ukuk’
khohl
i
sa”Isi
gh
“
OkayIheary
oumom”
“
Yeaht
alkt
ohi
m,communi
cat
ioni
s
i
mpor
tanti
nar
elat
ionshi
p.If
eel
sor
ry
f
orbot
hoft
hem butIbel
i
eveev
ery
thi
ng
happensf
ort
her
eason.Godwoul
dn’
t
hav
egi
vent
hem t
hesebabi
esi
fthey
woul
dn’
tbeabl
etot
akecar
eoft
hem”
“
Ihav
enev
erhear
dofcoj
oinedt
wins
mi
naIwassoshockedt
oseet
hem
l
aphongat
hiuMpendul
oesemncane”
“
Iknowt
hef
amouscoj
oinedt
wins
Abi
gai
landBr
it
tanyt
heymakei
tlookso
easi
l
ytol
i
vewi
tht
hei
rcondi
ti
on.They
mustl
ovet
hei
rchi
l
drenandaccept
t
hem ast
heyar
e”
“
Justl
i
key
ouaccept
edmebl
i
ndasI
was”Ismi
l
eandsher
etur
nsi
t
“
Yesl
ookaty
ounowandev
eni
fyour
wer
ebl
i
ndf
orev
erI
’
dst
il
ll
ovey
oubaby
”
“
Ilov
eyoumom y
ouar
emyr
ock”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomyMi
racl
ebutst
op
hav
ingsexi
nmyki
tchen”Igi
ggl
eit
’sher
ki
tchennownotour
s.
Iseemydaught
ermov
ingandgetup
f
rom t
hechai
r.Shebl
i
nksherey
esopen
andpout
sherl
i
ps
“
Heybaby
”mom get
scl
osert
ousbut
ont
heot
hersi
de
“
Kam Kam kadr
agongr
anny
”shel
ooks
atusbl
ankl
y
“
Howar
eyoumoonl
i
ght
”
“
It
’shur
tsmommy
”herey
esgl
i
stenwi
th
t
ear
s
“
Wher
ebabygi
rl
”sheshowsmeher
t
ummyandbur
sti
ntot
ear
s.Ther
e’sa
gr
eenmar
kont
hesi
deofhert
ummy
.
I
t’
smusthav
ebeenwher
eshewas
ki
cked
“
Iwi
l
lgocal
lthedoct
or”mom say
sas
shewal
ksout
“
Aski
esst
handwasami
woz
akumama”I
pi
ckherupandsi
tont
hechai
r,cr
adl
i
ng
heri
nmyar
ms.
“
Mommyuncl
eMabut
howasbeat
ing
mydaddy
”shesobs
“
OhbabyI
’
m sor
rybutdaddyi
sokay
.”
“
Iwantt
oseehi
m”
“
Wewi
l
lvi
deocal
lhi
mtheny
ouwi
l
lsee
hi
m okay
”shenodsherhead.Iwi
peher
t
ear
sandki
ssherf
orehead
“
Ilov
eyoubaby
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomommy
”mom andt
he
doct
orwal
kin.
“
Hel
l
ocut
epi
e”Thedoct
orsay
spl
ayi
ng
wi
thmydaught
er’
scheeks
“
Don’
tcal
lmet
hat
”shesay
swi
thabi
t
ofat
ti
tude.
“
Ohwhy
?”
“
Idon’
teatpi
eyoucan’
tcal
lmewi
th
somet
hingIdon’
teat
”wechuckl
e
“
OkayIunder
standhowaboutsweet
cakes”
“
Ilov
ecakes”shesmi
l
esi
nnocent
ly
“
Iguesst
hatmeansy
es.I
’
m Doct
or
Nz
imande,
woul
dyoupl
easeshowme
wher
eit
’shur
ts”
“
Iwasj
oki
ngdoct
orI
’
mfi
ne”shef
akesa
gr
in
“
Hewon’
tinj
ecty
oumypumpki
nshow
hi
m”
“
Ha.
ahmama”sheshakesherhead
“
Don’
tyout
rustme”
“
Itr
usty
oumommybutIdon’
ttr
usthi
m”
Hai
bol
enganei
sget
ti
ngsmar
tereach
passi
ngday
“
Youcant
rustmesweetcakesj
ustl
et
mesee”sher
eluct
ant
lyshowst
he
doct
or,
hegi
vesheral
i
ttl
emassage
whi
chmakesherf
li
nchesi
npai
n
“
OkayIwi
l
lsendt
henur
set
ogi
veher
somet
hingf
ort
hepai
n.”
“
Thanky
oudoct
or”mom say
s
“
Youar
ewel
comeMi
ssMt
himkhul
u.
Pl
easeex
cuseme.Iwi
l
lcomet
ocheck
ony
oul
atersweetcakesf
ornowhi
gh
f
ive”Theyhi
ghf
ivet
henhewal
ksout
.
“
Letmegogethert
oil
etr
iesandmi
ne.I
wi
l
lst
aywi
thherunt
ilshe’
sdi
schar
ged”
“
Nomom y
oudon’
thav
etodot
hat
.Iwi
l
l
st
aywi
thher
”
“
Mir
ayouneedt
oresty
ouar
epr
egnant
r
emember
.Kamar
iai
smy
gr
anddaught
erI
t’
smyj
obt
obeher
e
unt
ilshe’
sdi
schar
ged”
“
Iknowmom andIr
eal
l
yappr
eci
atei
t
butIgott
his.Iwon’
trestenoughi
fshe’
s
notbymysi
de.Ir
atherbeher
ewi
thher
”
shesi
ghs
“
Youar
est
ubbor
nMi
rabuti
tsf
ine.Let
megogetev
ery
thi
ngy
ouguy
swi
l
lneed”
“
Thanky
oumommy
”sheki
ssesour
f
oreheadsandwal
ksout
.Igeti
nbed
wi
thmydaught
erandcuddl
eher
.

TosayI
’
m hur
twoul
dbean
under
stat
ementt
hatshecoul
dn’
t
answeronesi
mpl
equest
ion.I
fshe
doesn’
tlov
ehi
m sheshoul
dhav
esai
d
noi
tcl
ear
lyt
hathel
oveshi
m.Isawhow
shewascomf
ort
inghi
m,wi
pinghi
s
t
ear
s,al
l
owi
nghi
mtor
esthi
sbi
g
cr
ippl
edheadonmybaby
!Sheev
en
cal
l
edhi
m wi
thhi
ssur
name.Ihearmy
cardooropeni
ngandpul
lupmyhead
f
rom t
hest
eer
ingwheel
andl
ookatmy
uncl
e.
“
Mpi
nst
hiy
egaz
iwhat
’swr
ong”Isi
tup
st
rai
ghtandsi
gh
“
I’
mfi
neuncl
e”
“
Noy
ouar
enotIsawhowy
ougotoutof
t
hatdoor
”
“
Ithi
nkmymar
ri
agei
sov
erbef
orei
t’
s
ev
enst
art
ed”Hel
ooksatmewai
ti
ngf
or
met
oel
abor
atemor
esoIex
plai
ntohi
m.
“
MmhIsee”Hest
aresatmeast
hough
he’
str
yingt
odeducewhatIj
ustsai
d
“
Mal
umedon’
ttel
lmey
oudon’
tsee
any
thi
ngwr
ongwi
thwhatMi
radi
d”
“
Ofcour
seIdon’
tseeany
thi
ngwr
ong
howev
erMi
rawasshowi
ngt
oomuch
af
fect
iont
owar
dshi
m.Theset
wohav
e
adaught
ert
oget
herandSoxi
snot
gi
vi
ngupsoIunder
standhowy
ouar
e
f
eel
i
ngbutMi
rawasn’
twr
ongf
orbei
ng
t
her
efort
hef
atherofherdaught
er.
Remembert
hatany
thi
ngt
hatwi
l
l
happent
oMpendul
oitwi
l
laf
fect
Kamar
iaaswel
l
.That
’swhatMi
rai
s
t
ryi
ngt
opr
event
,ifMpendul
o’sanger
escal
atesKamar
iami
ghtbeav
ict
imt
oo
al
readyshe’
sher
eint
hehospi
tal
.You
guy
sneedt
osi
tdownandt
alkabout
t
hist
ell
herhowy
ouf
eel
andset
boundar
ies.Ial
mostl
ostBongaf
ornot
t
rust
ingherandI
’
m sur
eri
ghtnowt
hat
howMi
raf
eel
s,t
haty
oudon’
ttr
usther
.I
hopey
ouwon’
tloseherov
ert
his.I
fI
wer
eyouI
’
dbepr
oudofherf
ort
ell
i
ng
Mpendul
othet
rut
h.Youhav
eawi
se
wi
fet
her
edon’
tal
l
owy
ouri
nsecur
it
ies
andf
earofl
osi
nghert
oMpendul
oget
t
hebet
terofy
oubecausey
ouwi
l
lpush
hert
ohi
sar
ms”Isi
ghokaymay
beI
ov
err
eact
edat
ad.
“
Iheary
oumal
umet
hanky
ou”
“
Sisonkempi
ntshi
yegaz
inowgot
alkt
o
her
”Hepat
smyshoul
derIt
henj
ump
outoft
hecarandski
pinsi
de.If
indher
cuddl
i
ngwi
thourdaught
erandas
al
way
sangel
facei
stheonet
alki
ng.I
m
gl
adt
oseet
hatshe’
snotbadl
yinj
ured.
She’
stheonet
hatseesmef
ir
stand
beams
“
Daddy
!”
“
Myangel
face”Ishuf
fl
etowar
dst
hem
andt
akehert
hensi
tdownont
hechai
r,
pul
l
ingheronmyl
ap
“
Howar
eyouangel
facekadaddy
”
“
I’
mfi
nedaddyseakaangel
face”
“
Daddyseahuh?
”
“
YesSnosai
dyournamemeanssea
andmyot
herdaddymeansanswerso
y
ouar
edaddyseaandhe’
sdaddy
answer
”Ican’
thel
pbutsmi
l
e
“
Yousuchasmar
tass”Ibl
urti
tout
wi
thoutt
hinki
ng
“
Whati
sanassdaddy
”Shi
t!Il
ookupat
myDol
l
facewho’
sst
if
li
ngal
augh.Ican
seet
hatshehadbeencr
yingandt
hat
’s
t
hel
astt
hingIwant
.
“
Idownl
oadedanewgamef
ory
oumy
angel
don’
tyouwantt
oseei
t”
“
Idodaddy
!”It
akeoutmyphoneand
showherhowt
opl
ayt
henewgame.
“
It
’sl
i
tdaddyIl
ovei
t”Igi
ggl
eIdon’
t
knowwhyev
ery
timesheopensher
mout
hsheal
way
sleav
esmesur
pri
sed
I
’
m sur
ebynowIshoul
dbeusedt
oher
smar
tmout
h.
“
Sither
eont
hechai
randpl
ayy
our
game”Ipl
aceheront
hechai
randsi
t
nex
ttomyDol
l
faceont
hebed.Icar
ess
hercheekst
ari
ngdeepi
nherpai
nfi
l
led
haz
eley
es.
“
I’
m sor
ryIov
err
eact
edabi
t”
“
Abi
t?”
“
Yesabi
tbabyputy
our
sel
finmyshoes
If
oundy
oucomf
ort
inganot
herman,
t
hesamemanwhoi
syourbabydaddy
andwhost
il
lwant
syou.
”
“
Igety
ouIwoul
dhav
ebeenj
eal
oust
oo
butdi
dyouhav
etobr
ingupmypast
?”
“
I’
m sor
rybabyIdi
dn’
tmeant
oIwas
hur
tI’
m st
il
lhur
tthaty
oucoul
dn’
t
answerwhet
hery
oul
ovehi
m ornot
”
“
Yourquest
ionf
eltl
i
keani
nsul
t
Lwandl
elwenkosi
.Thef
actt
haty
ou
askedmet
hat,
itsshowst
haty
oudon’
t
t
rustme.I
t’
snotl
i
key
ouf
oundme
ki
ssi
nghi
mli
key
ouwer
eki
ssi
ngNos”I
cl
enchmyj
aws
“
Ithoughtwear
eov
ert
hat
…”shecut
s
meof
f
“
Wewer
eunt
ily
oushowedmet
hatIcan
usey
ourpastt
ojust
if
ymyi
nsecur
it
ies”
“
BabyIdon’
twantust
ofi
ght
”
“
Ial
sodon’
twantust
ofi
ghtLwenkosi
butIwon’
tli
etoy
ouI
’
m sohur
tthaty
ou
t
hinkI
’
dcheatony
ou.Ibel
i
evet
hati
f
y
oubr
ingupt
hepasti
t’
smeansy
ouar
e
st
il
lnotov
eri
tsocl
ear
lyy
ouar
enot
ov
erf
indi
ngmeandMpendul
ohav
ing
sex
.Letmer
emi
ndy
out
hatIdi
dn’
t
cheatony
ousoy
ouhav
enor
ightt
oact
l
i
keIcheat
edony
ou.
”
“
Iknowbabyandt
hat
’snott
rueI
’
m so
ov
ert
hatandIdeser
vedi
taf
tert
hewayI
hur
tyoubutI
’
m humant
ooDol
l
faceI
hav
efeel
i
ngs.Seei
ngy
oucomf
ort
ing
t
hesamemant
hatwanty
ouhi
ghand
l
owex
act
lyt
hewayy
oucomf
ortmegot
mescar
edandj
eal
ous.
”
“
SoIwassupposet
owat
chhi
m cr
yin
f
rontme”
“
Nobuty
ouwer
etooaf
fect
ionat
eMi
ra,
wi
pinghi
stear
swi
thy
ourhands,
cal
l
ing
hi
m hi
ssur
name,
cuppi
nghi
sface,
st
ari
ngdeepi
ntohi
sey
esandal
l
owi
ng
hi
mtor
esthi
sbi
gsquar
eshapedhead
onmybabyhay
ithatwast
oo
af
fect
ionat
eandwhenIaskedy
oui
fyou
l
ovehi
myoucoul
dn’
tanswerwhatwasI
supposedt
othi
nk?RememberSoxi
s
notast
rangerhe’
syourbabydaddyand
hest
il
lwant
syousobadam Iwr
ongt
o
f
eel
scar
edt
hatI
’
m goi
ngt
olosey
out
o
hi
m?Am Iwr
ongt
ogetj
eal
ous?
”She
si
ghsheav
il
yandt
akesmyhandsi
nto
her
s
“
I’
m sor
ryIwasj
ustcomf
ort
ingt
hepoor
guyobl
i
vioust
omyaf
fect
iont
owar
ds
hi
m.He’
sgoi
ngt
hroughal
otandhe’
s
l
osi
ngcont
rol
ofhi
msel
f.Icoul
dn’
tsi
t
anddonot
hingIhadt
obet
her
eforhi
m
becausehi
sbehav
iori
snotaf
fect
ing
hi
m onl
ybutmoonl
i
ghtt
oo.Mybaby
hav
enev
ersl
epti
nahospi
tal
bef
orebut
t
odayshe’
sgoi
ngt
osl
eepher
ebecause
ofsomet
hingt
hatcoul
dhav
ebeen
pr
event
ed.Idon’
tlov
ehi
m Il
ovey
ou
Lwandl
elwenkosi
doy
out
hinki
fIl
ove
hi
m Iwoul
dhav
espentmyday
sin
Keny
athi
nki
ngabouty
ouev
erysi
ngl
e
secondaf
terwhaty
ouanddaddydi
dto
us.Yout
hinkIwoul
dhav
ethought
abouty
ouwhi
l
eIknowt
hatIhav
ea
daught
erwi
thhi
m?Ev
erypar
entwant
t
hei
rki
dst
ohav
eapr
operf
ami
l
ybut
duet
oci
rcumst
ancesweendupco-
pat
ent
ing.Yeshewant
smebutIchose
y
ouIwi
l
lst
il
lchoosey
out
omor
rowand
t
hedayaf
terandf
ort
her
estofmyl
i
fei
f
y
ouar
enotsat
isf
iedwi
tht
hatt
henI
’
m
af
rai
dyouandIwi
l
lnev
erwor
kout
.We
wi
l
lal
way
sbef
ight
ingbecauseof
Mpendul
oaf
teral
lhe’
sKamar
iaf
ather
sohewi
l
lal
way
sbepar
tofourl
i
ves.
”
“
Ilov
eyouandIdon’
twantt
olosey
ou
baby
.Iknowt
hatSoxwi
l
lal
way
sbepar
t
ofourl
i
vessoIwoul
dreal
l
yappr
eci
ate
i
tiff
rom nowonhet
alkst
omewi
th
ev
ery
thi
ngr
egar
dingKamar
ial
i
keman
t
oman.Iwi
l
lnev
erkeephi
m awayf
rom
hi
sdaught
erwhatIdon’
tli
kei
sthathe’
s
di
srespect
ingme.Heneedt
oknowhi
s
pl
ace,
hei
sjustKamar
ia’
sfat
hernot
hing
mor
e.Thef
oreheadki
sses,
spendi
ng
t
imewi
thy
ouandKamar
ia,
tel
l
ingy
ou
howmuchhel
ovesy
oushoul
dst
op.
Youal
soneedt
ost
opshowi
nghi
m
af
fect
ion,
wor
dsofwi
sdom and
comf
ortar
eenought
her
e’snoneedf
or
t
ouchy
-feel
y.I
’
mtheonl
ymany
ou
shoul
dwi
pehi
stear
s,t
heonl
ymany
ou
hav
etoal
l
owr
esthi
sheadony
our
t
ummy
.I’
m sur
eumt
anami
ebesi
ndel
wa
nj
eisi
menkez
asekhandaphekwakhe
ay
”Isaybr
ushi
nghert
ummy
,she
gi
ggl
es.I
’
m gl
adt
hatImadeherl
aughI
wantt
oseeherhappyandl
aughi
ngal
l
t
het
ime.
“
Tel
lmommymyboyt
ell
herbel
i
kusi
nda
i
khandal
embaz
ophekwakho”If
eel
my
boyki
cki
ngasIbr
ushhi
smom’
stummy
ohhowt
hesel
i
ttl
eki
ckst
ugsatmy
hear
tst
ri
ngs.I
t’
sal
way
sfeel
sli
kei
t’
sthe
f
ir
stt
ime.Il
ovehowr
esponsi
vehei
s
ev
eryt
imeIt
ouchhi
smom’
stummy
.He
knowsdaddyt
hisone.
“
Ilov
eyoubaby
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Il
ookatKamar
iawho’
s
busypl
ayi
ngt
hegameandst
eal
aki
ss.I
l
ovet
hiswomansomuch.Il
ooki
ntoher
ey
esandIdon’
tli
kewhatt
heyar
e
r
efl
ect
ingwhi
chi
swor
ryandf
ear
.
“
What
’swr
ongbaby
”Icupherf
ace
“
I’
m scar
edbabywhati
fourbabyi
s
di
sabl
edt
oo”
“
Yourgy
necol
ogi
stwoul
dhav
esai
d
somet
hingbabydon’
twor
ryourboyi
s
f
ine.Don’
tcompar
eyour
sel
fwi
thGugu
may
beshe’
spay
ingf
orhersi
ns.
”
“
Butt
hisi
stoomuchcoj
oinedt
winspho
y
hoooandt
heyar
einnocent
”
“
Kar
mahasnol
i
mitandKamar
iai
sal
so
I
nnocent
.Shedoesn’
tdeser
vewhat
happenedt
oherr
ememberwhenshe’
s
ol
derwehav
etot
ell
hert
rut
handi
t
woul
dhur
ther
”
“
I’
m soscar
ed”shewhi
sper
sandIcat
ch
hert
ear
swi
thmyt
humbsbef
oret
hey
f
all
.
“
Don’
tbeev
ery
thi
ngi
sgoi
ngt
obeokay
babypl
easest
opst
ressi
ng”
“
MommyI
’
m st
arv
ing”Kamar
iasay
s
“
Dragongr
annyi
sonherwaywi
thf
ood
andourcl
othes”
“
Arewegoi
ngt
osl
eepher
e?”
“
Yesmybaby
”
“
Ont
hissmal
lbed?
”Youcoul
dseeher
f
acer
ightnow,I
t’
scomi
cal
.
“
Yes”
“
Daddyt
oo?
”
“
Nodaddywi
l
lsl
eepont
hechai
r”Isay
“
Iwi
l
lsl
eepwi
thdaddyont
hebedand
mommywi
l
lsl
eepal
oneont
hechai
r”
“
Hawuwhy
?”Mi
raaskscur
iousl
y
“
Ngobauz
ongi
mpi
ntshamama
l
ombhedemuncanekabi
wenaunesi
su
esi
khul
u”Mi
raandIbur
sti
ntol
aught
er.
“
Iknowt
hatt
her
e’sababyi
nmommy
’s
t
ummy
”Iwasn’
tex
pect
ingt
hatwhot
old
hert
hat
,Snot
hatl
i
ttl
etr
amp!
“
Whot
oldy
out
hat
?”
“
Ihear
ddr
agongr
annyt
alki
ngt
okhul
u
somommyhowdi
dyouputt
hebaby
i
nsi
dey
ourt
ummy
?”Mi
raandl
ookat
eachot
hershi
thowdoy
ouanswert
hat
t
oa4y
earol
d?

Ican’
tseem t
oleav
ethei
rsi
ghtIhav
e
beenher
ewi
tht
hem t
hewhol
edayev
en
t
houghI
’
m scar
edt
otoucht
hem.If
eel
l
i
keIwoul
dhur
tthem i
fIt
oucht
hem,
t
heyl
ookl
i
ket
heyi
nsomuchpai
n.
Nev
eri
nmywi
l
destdr
eamshav
eI
t
houghtIwoul
dgi
vebi
rt
htocoj
oined
t
wins.Inev
ert
houghtsuchi
spossi
ble
unt
ilt
oday
.Ideser
vet
hispai
nfor
separ
ati
ngadaught
erandaf
atherbut
mybabi
esdon’
tdeser
vet
his.Theyar
e
i
nnocentwhyGoddi
dn’
thav
emer
cyon
t
hem.Ican’
tbegi
ntoi
magi
nehowwi
l
l
t
heyl
i
vel
i
ket
hisi
t’
sseem soi
mpossi
ble.
“
MissNcubei
t’
sti
mef
orsuppergot
o
y
ourr
oom”
“
Justaseconddoc”
“
Noy
ouhav
ebeenher
ethewhol
eday
andIl
ety
oubecomenow”Igetupf
rom
t
hechai
randwegot
omyr
oom wher
e
shehel
psmeset
tl
eincar
eful
l
ysi
nceI
hav
eivdr
ip.I
nami
nut
emyf
oodi
s
br
oughtIt
ryt
oeatbutIcoul
dn’
tdown
any
thi
ng.
“
Youcan’
ttaket
hesecapsul
esonan
empt
yst
omachMi
sspl
easeeat
”I
managet
odown5spoonst
henshe
gi
vesmet
hecapsul
es.Idownt
hem wi
th
wat
er.
“
Hav
eyouev
erwat
chAbi
gai
land
Br
it
tanyHensel
real
show?
”Ishakemy
headno
“
Letmesear
cht
hem f
ory
ouandIwi
l
l
l
eav
eyouwi
thmyphonet
owat
cht
hei
r
v
ideos”Shet
akesoutherphoneandgo
t
hroughi
tthengi
vei
ttome
“
Iwi
l
lcomebackneh”Inod.I
’
m usedt
o
bet
reat
edl
i
keI
’
m nohumansot
his
ki
ndnessf
rom t
hedoct
ort
othenur
se
sur
pri
sesme.Iwat
cht
hev
ideoson
YouTubet
ear
sst
reami
ngdownmyf
ace,
asmuchast
heymakei
tseem l
i
kei
t’
s
soeasybutIcanseet
hati
t’
shar
dnj
e.I
don’
twantmyboy
stobel
i
vel
i
ket
his
t
heydon’
tdeser
vet
his.Theyar
ejust
babi
esf
orcr
yingoutl
oud,
theydeser
ve
t
oli
vel
i
keanyot
herbabi
es.Icoul
dn’
t
cont
inuewi
thot
herv
ideosI
t’
stoomuch
f
orme.Ideci
det
ocal
lmymot
herbut
t
hephonei
sanswer
edbydadsoIdr
op
t
hecal
l
.If
indmy
sel
fdi
ali
ngt
henumber
f
unnyenoughi
t’
sst
il
lonmyhead.
“
Hel
l
o”shesay
sont
heot
hersi
de.It
ry
t
orepl
ybutwor
dsar
est
uckonmy
t
hroat
“
Hel
l
o..
.Yebo…Hel
l
loooo”Icoul
dn’
thel
p
my
sel
fbutbur
sti
ntot
ear
s.
“
Gugu”Icantmi
sst
heshocki
nher
v
oice
“
I’
m sor
ryIdi
dn’
tknowwhot
ocal
lI
knowI
’
mthel
astper
sony
ouwanthear
f
rom I
’
m sososor
ryMi
raf
or
ev
ery
thi
ng…”Thedoorswi
ngsopenI
dr
opt
hecal
lqui
ckl
y.
“
Youwat
chedt
hem”
“
Yest
hanky
ou”
“
Ihopet
heygav
eyouhopet
hat
ev
ery
thi
ngi
sgoi
ngt
obeokay
.Don’
tcr
y
y
ezwa”Inodmyheadandshegi
vesme
ahugt
henwal
ksout
.It
ryt
osl
eepbut
mymi
ndi
sreel
i
ngwi
tht
hought
sandmy
hear
tispai
nful
thatIcanf
eel
thepai
n
phy
sical
l
y.If
eel
li
kei
t’
sgoi
ngt
ost
op
beat
inganymomentf
rom now.Ihav
e
nev
erf
elthopel
ess,
sor
eandbr
okenasI
am r
ightnow.Howdi
dIgether
e?Ihad
i
tal
l
,myl
ovel
yfami
l
yev
ent
houghdad
hadhi
sday
sandIal
sohadmybest
f
ri
endwhowasl
i
kemysi
sterf
rom
anot
hermom.Ir
emembert
hedayImet
hershewasnewandcoul
dn’
tfi
ndher
waybackhomeaf
tert
aki
ngawal
ksoI
hel
pedherf
indherhomet
hathowwe
becamef
ri
ends.Il
ovedheri
nfactIst
il
l
doandImi
sshersomuch,
sheal
so
l
ovedmebutwhatdi
dIdo?Ir
uinedour
si
ster
hoodbyal
l
owi
ngamancome
bet
weenus.Asasi
sterIcl
aimedt
obe
t
oherIshoul
dhav
etr
ust
edherenough
t
hatshewoul
dnev
ert
akemymanand
l
ett
hingsbet
hewayt
heyar
e.Ihear
d
she’
sget
ti
ngmar
ri
ednex
tmont
hto
Lwandl
eit
’sj
ustshowst
hatshewas
nev
eri
nter
est
edt
oSoxt
obegi
nwi
th.I
l
ostmybestf
ri
endandpl
ayedwi
th
peopl
e’
sfeel
i
ngsov
eramant
hatnev
er
l
ovedmef
rom t
hef
ir
stpl
ace.Ial
l
owed
mysi
tuat
iont
ochanget
heper
sonIam
byt
ryi
ngsohar
dtokeepMpendul
owho
waspr
ovi
dingmewi
thev
ery
thi
ngI
neededaf
termyf
atherdi
sownedme.
NowI
’
mfaci
ngt
heconsequencesofmy
act
ions.Lessonl
ear
nti
sthatI
nthi
s
wor
ldy
oucanbeany
thi
ngy
ouwant
,do
what
every
ouwantt
owi
thwhoev
ery
ou
wantt
obutbecar
eful
tonev
erl
oset
he
si
ghtofwhoy
ouar
e.Idon’
tknowhow
di
dIf
all
asl
eepbuti
t’
sthenex
tmor
ning
andIhav
edonemyhy
gienepr
ocess.I
’
m
wai
ti
ngf
ort
hedoct
ornow,
speakoft
he
dev
il
.
“
Mor
ningMi
ssNcube”
“
Mor
ningdoct
orhowar
eyou?
”
“
I’
mfi
neandy
our
sel
f?”
“
Sti
l
lal
i
ve”
“
Itwi
l
lgetbet
terwi
tht
ime.Yougoi
ngt
o
needt
her
apyt
ohel
pyoudeal
wit
hthi
s
t
rauma”
“
Ihav
emadeadeci
siondoct
or”
“
Okay
?”
“
Iwantt
oswi
tchof
fthemachi
nesand
sett
hem f
ree”shel
ooksatme
“
Arey
ousur
e?”
“
Yest
heywi
l
ldi
eev
ent
ual
l
yIdon’
twant
t
obondwi
tht
hem t
hent
heyl
eav
eme”
“
Thef
actt
haty
ougav
ebi
rt
htot
hem
t
heymi
ghtsur
viv
eMi
ssNcube”
“
Sti
l
ltheydon’
tdeser
vet
hisIr
atherset
t
hem f
reet
henl
ett
hem gr
owupl
i
ket
his.
Theydon’
tdeser
vet
hisdoct
heyar
ejust
babi
eswhodeser
vet
oli
veanor
mal
li
fe
l
i
keanybabi
es”
“
Youdon’
tneedt
omaket
hisdeci
sion
nowt
akey
ourt
ime”
“
It
’sf
inaldoct
or”
“
Whataboutt
hef
ather
?”
“
Hesai
dtheyar
enothi
s”
“
Hecal
l
edmey
est
erdayandasked
whi
chhospi
tal
arey
oui
n”
“
Ibor
rowedt
heot
hernur
se’
sphoneand
cal
l
edhi
m het
oldmet
oleav
ehi
m
al
one”Il
i
eofcour
se.Iknowt
hatman
wantnot
hingt
odowi
thus.
“
I’
m sor
ryt
oheart
hatbutar
eyousur
e
aboutt
his”
“
Yesdoct
or”
“
Letmegett
hef
ormssot
haty
oucan
si
gnt
hem”shewal
ksoutandcomes
backwi
tht
hef
orms.Isi
gnedev
ery
thi
ng
t
henshet
akesmet
othei
rroom.I
t
mi
ghtseem cr
uel
andsel
fi
shbuti
t’
sthe
bestdeci
sionf
ort
hem.

Ihar
dlysl
eptl
astni
ghtIwast
hinki
ng
aboutev
ery
thi
ngMi
rasai
dtomeIhat
e
t
oadmi
tthatev
ery
thi
ngshesai
dist
rue.
I
’
m st
il
lbaf
fl
edhowdi
dshef
igur
ed
ev
ery
thi
ngout
.She’
sri
ghtt
houghi
t’
s
t
imeIdeal
wit
hmydemonsf
ort
hesake
ofmychi
l
dren.Iar
ri
vedl
astni
ghti
n
Dur
banandIwassot
ir
edIcoul
dn’
tgo
t
othehospi
tal
butIcal
l
edt
henumber
t
hatsentt
hepi
ctur
esandIf
oundouti
t’
s
Gugu’
sdoct
or.I
’
m soner
vousIdon’
t
wantt
oli
eandmyhear
tis
j
ackhammer
ingIsweari
twoul
dcome
outofmymout
h.If
indanur
sei
nGugu’
s
r
oom andaskhert
oshowmewher
e
Gugui
swi
thourbabi
es.It
akeahuge
br
eat
hebef
oreImakemywayi
n.
“
Goodmor
ning”Igr
eett
hem andGugu
l
ooksshockedt
oseeme
“
Mor
ningsi
ronl
yfami
l
ymember
sar
e
al
l
owedt
obeher
e”
“
I’
mthef
atheroft
het
wins”
“
Ohokay
.Letmel
eav
eyout
oit
”she
wal
ksout
.Ist
ayr
oot
edonmyspott
oo
af
rai
dtomov
e.Thei
rsi
ghtt
ri
gger
stear
s
i
nmyey
es
“
Comecl
oserandsaygoodby
etot
hem”
“
Whatdoessupposet
omeanar
ethey
dead?
”
“
NoI
’
m goi
ngt
oswi
tchof
fthe
machi
nes”
“
What
?”Iwal
kcl
oserandl
ookatt
hem.
“
Youhear
dme”
“
NoGuguy
oucan’
tdot
hatpl
easeI
’
m
beggi
ngy
ou.Iknowt
hatInegl
ect
ed
y
oubutdon’
tdot
hat
.”
“
Thi
sisnotabouty
ouSoxi
t’
sabout
t
hem.Howar
etheygoi
ngt
oli
vel
i
ke
t
his”
“
Honest
lyIdon’
tknowbutGodwoul
dn’
t
hav
ecr
eat
edt
hem l
i
ket
hisi
fit
’s
i
mpossi
ble”
“
Thedoct
orsai
dtheywoul
ddi
esol
et
sett
hem f
reenow”
“
Lett
hem di
eont
hei
rowni
ftheywi
l
l.
Youmaynev
erknowt
heymi
ghtsur
viv
e”
“
Soxt
heycannev
erbesepar
ated.They
shar
eev
eryor
gansex
cepthear
ts,
lungs
andki
dney
swhi
chmeanst
heywi
l
lbe
l
i
ket
hisf
ort
her
estoft
hei
rli
fe.Thi
nk
abouthowwoul
dthi
saf
fectt
hem?How
woul
dtheyf
eel
knowi
ngt
hatt
heyar
e
di
ff
erent
?Howwi
l
ltheyl
i
vecoj
oinedl
i
ke
t
his?Peopl
ewi
l
lal
way
slookatt
hem
di
ff
erent
.Idon’
tev
enwantt
oment
ion
school
kids,
theywi
l
lbul
l
ythem or
wor
sebescar
edoft
hem.I
t’
stoomuch
andhear
tbr
eaki
ngSoxt
heydeser
ve
goodnor
mal
li
fenott
hisIr
atherl
et
t
hem got
henal
l
owt
hem t
oli
vel
i
ket
his”
shecr
iesandmyhear
tsi
nks.I
’
m af
rai
d
whatshe’
ssay
ingmakessensebutI
don’
twantt
olett
hem go.
“
ButGugu….
”
“
Ther
e’snobutSoxy
ouf
ail
edt
odor
ight
byt
hem whent
heywer
einmyt
ummy
can’
tyouj
ustdooner
ightf
ort
hem f
or
onceandsett
hem f
ree”
“
Soy
ouwer
egoi
ngt
oswi
tchof
fthe
machi
neswi
thoutme?
”Shel
aughs
“
Hehewhoar
eyoubut
i?”
“
I’
m sor
ry…”
“
Idon’
twanty
oursor
ri
esSoxy
ouar
e
t
heonewhochoset
onegl
ectus.The
l
easty
oucoul
ddoi
ssett
hem f
ree”
“
NoIr
efuse!
”
“
Youhav
enor
ightt
oref
usey
ou
negl
ect
edt
hem!
”
“
IknowandI
’
m sor
rybuty
oucan’
t
puni
shmybabi
esf
orwhatIdi
dpl
ease
Gugu”
“
I’
m notpushi
ngy
ouSoxIwi
l
lnev
er
puni
shmybabi
es.I
’
m doi
ngt
hebest
deci
sionf
ort
hem”
“
Howdoy
ouknowi
t’
sthebesty
ouar
e
r
obbi
ngof
fthem achancet
oli
ve”
“
I’
m sav
ingt
hem f
rom al
lthepai
nthey
ar
egoi
ngt
ogot
hrough.Iknowwhat
r
ightf
ort
hem unl
i
key
ou.I
’
m sor
rymy
babi
esIf
ail
edy
oubutmommyhast
o
dot
hisf
ort
hesakeofy
oubot
h.Mommy
l
ovey
out
wosososomuch”Tear
srol
l
downherf
ace
“
Resti
npeacemynunuz
”
“
GuguNooooo!
”Iscr
eam t
ryi
ngt
ost
op
her
“
I’
m sor
rybuti
t’
sfort
hebest
”shet
ri
es
t
ohol
dmebutIy
ankherawayandt
ry
t
osav
emyboy
sinv
ain.Isi
nkont
he
f
loorwi
thmykneesandcr
y,she
env
elopesmei
nherar
msandwebot
h
r
eleasegutwr
enchi
ngsobs.
CHAPTER78(
unedi
ted)

Ican’
tst
opt
hinki
ngaboutt
hecal
lI
r
ecei
vedf
rom Gugul
astni
ght
.Iwi
sh
cansayI
’
m ov
erwhatshedi
dtousbut
I
’
m nothowev
erIf
eel
sor
ryf
orher
.That
gi
rlwasoncemybestf
ri
endandIl
oved
hersomuch.Idon’
tknowhowdi
dwe
gether
e,ev
ery
thi
nghappenedsof
ast
bef
oreIknewi
tIhadl
ostmyoneand
onl
yfr
iend.
“
Didy
ouhearwhatIj
ustsai
d?”Lee
snapsmeoutofmyt
rai
noft
hought
s
“
Uhm y
es”
“
So?
”
“
What
?”
“
Buty
ousai
dyouhear
dmeMi
ra”
“
I’
m sor
rymymi
ndi
sal
lov
ert
hepl
ace”
“
Londi
isout
sidehewant
stoapol
ogi
ze
f
orwhathesai
d”Ir
oll
myey
es
“
Idon’
thav
eti
mef
orLondi
siz
weLee”
“
Hef
eel
sbadr
eal
l
y”
“
What
ever
”
“
Justhearhi
m outpl
ease”
“
Tel
lhi
mtocomei
n”Mi
nut
esl
ater
Londi
siz
wewal
ksi
nlooki
nggor
geous
asal
way
sinhi
sbl
ueadi
dast
racksui
ts
andwhi
tesneaker
s.
“
Hel
l
o”
“
Hi”Hel
ooksatLee
“
Letmegobabe.
..
Kissmyl
i
ttl
epuddi
ng
f
orme”
“
Thanksf
orcomi
ngLeeIr
eal
l
y
appr
eci
atei
t”shewant
edt
otakemeout
andcheermeupaf
terwhathappened
y
est
erdaybutIt
oldhert
hatIcan’
tsi
nce
I
’
m her
eint
hehospi
tal
soshecame
her
e.
“
Don’
tment
ionI
t.Speedr
ecov
eryt
o
l
i
ttl
epuddi
ng.Iwi
l
lcal
lyoul
ater
”
“
Thanky
ou”sheki
ssesmycheekand
wal
ksout
.Leehav
ebecomemor
ethen
j
ustmymanager
.She’
sal
way
sther
efor
mewhenev
erIneedher
.
“
I’
m sor
ryf
orev
ery
thi
ngIhav
esai
dand
t
hewayIt
reat
edy
ouf
ort
hesepast
mont
hs.Tr
uthi
sIal
l
owedmyemot
ions
t
ogett
hebet
terofme”
“
Oh”Hel
ooksatmeandsi
tsdownon
t
hechai
r
“
Im aj
erkIknowIshoul
dn’
thav
etr
eat
ed
y
out
hewayIdi
d.”
“
Whydoy
ouhat
emesomuch
Londi
siz
we?
”
“
Hat
e?NoIdon’
that
eyouMi
raIcan
nev
erhat
eyou”
“
Thenwhyar
eyout
reat
ingmel
i
ke
t
rash?
”Hechuckl
essheepi
shl
y
“
Thet
rut
hisIhav
efeel
i
ngsf
ory
ouand
comi
ngt
oar
eal
i
zat
iont
haty
oucan
nev
erbemi
nemademebi
tt
er.I
’
m so
sor
rypl
easef
orgi
veme”I
’
m st
il
lst
uck
ont
hef
eel
i
ngspar
t
“
Youhav
efeel
i
ngsf
orme?You?
”He
chuckl
es
“
Whydoy
oul
ookl
i
key
oudon’
tbel
i
eve
me”
“
I’
m sur
pri
sedt
haty
ouhav
efeel
i
ngs.
”
Hel
aughs
“
ComeonI
’
m human”
“
Dudet
hewayy
oubehav
eonewoul
d
sweary
ouhav
enof
eel
i
ngshencey
ou
don’
tcar
eaboutot
herpeopl
e’
sfeel
i
ngs”
“
I’
m nott
hatbadam I
?”
“
Youar
ewor
seman!
”
“
I’
m sor
ryIr
eal
l
yam”
“
It
sfi
ne”
“
Truce?
”
“
Yeaht
ruce”weshakehands
“
Sov
eley
ouar
eget
ti
ngmar
ri
ednex
t
mont
h”
“
Yes”Isaywi
thagr
inonmyf
ace
“
He’
sal
uckygoat
!Congr
atul
ati
ons
any
way
”
“
Imbuz
iuny
oko”(
agoati
syourmot
her
)
Lwenkosi
say
sashewal
ksi
nwi
th
Kamar
iai
nhi
sar
ms.Londi
siz
wel
aughs
“
Don’
ttakei
tper
sonal
manIwasj
ust
congr
atul
ati
ngy
ou”
“
Lal
elamf
anakaSi
thol
est
opt
alki
ng
nonsenset
omywi
feandmaki
nghercr
y.
I
yangi
nyany
isal
ent
oandangi
thandi
ukuny
any
angobamangi
nyany
angi
vel
e
ngi
nuke”
“
Icamet
oapol
ogi
zet
oher
”
“
Good”
“
Mir
aIshoul
dgoabenconou-
munchki
n”
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Sur
e”Hesay
stoLwenkosi
andwal
ks
out
.
“
Howdi
dtheX-
raygo?
”Hepl
aces
Kamar
iaonmyl
apsandsi
tsdownon
t
hechai
r.
“
Thedoct
ori
scomi
ngwi
tht
her
esul
ts.
Di
dyout
akey
ourv
itami
ns?
”
“
Yes”
“
Don’
tyouwantany
thi
ngel
se”
“
NobabyI
’
mfi
nebutt
hanky
ou”
“
Ishoul
dgof
reshenupy
out
wowi
l
lbe
okayr
ight
”
“
Yeahbabymom anddadar
eont
he
way
”
“
Letmewai
tfort
hedoct
orf
ir
stt
henI
wi
l
lleav
e”Thedoct
orwal
ksi
nandt
ell
s
ust
hatmydaught
ersust
ainedacl
osed
skul
lfr
act
urewhi
chmeanst
heski
nthat
cov
erst
hef
ract
urei
snotbr
okenorcut
.
Mydaught
eri
sgoi
ngt
obeokayasl
ong
asshet
akeshermedi
cat
ion.I
’
m so
happyt
omor
rowwear
egoi
nghomemy
bodyi
sachi
ngduet
oKamar
ia’
skar
ate
andi
tdoesn’
thel
pthatt
hisbedi
sso
t
iny
.
“
Iwi
l
lcomebackneh”
“
Okaypl
easebr
ingy
ogur
tandKFC
chi
ckenwi
ngs”
“
OkayIl
ovey
ouguy
s”
“
Wel
ovey
out
oodaddy
”Heki
ssesour
f
oreheadst
henwal
ksout
.
“
Mommyy
ousai
dwev
ideocal
ldaddy
answery
est
erday
”
“
OhI
’
m sor
rybaby
..
.br
ingmyphone”she
t
akesmyphoneont
hebesi
det
abl
eand
gi
vei
ttome.Iv
ideocal
lMpendul
oand
heappear
slooki
nghor
ri
bleandhi
s
smal
ley
esar
eredandpuf
fyIcant
ell
t
hathewascr
ying.
“
Heymt
wana”
“
Heyhowar
eyou”
“
Idon’
tknow”Heshr
ugshi
sshoul
der
s
“
I’
m sor
ryIcan’
tbegi
ntoi
magi
newhat
y
ouar
egoi
ngt
hrough.Youneedt
obe
st
rongf
ort
hem”
“
Theypassedaway
”Itcomesoutasa
whi
sper
“
OhI
’
m sor
ryMpendul
o”
“
Guguswi
tchedof
fthemachi
nes.
”I
don’
tknowwhatt
osay
.
“
Ngi
yax
oli
saMpendul
o”
“
Ibel
i
evet
heywoul
dhav
emadei
tyou
knowbutIal
sounder
standher
r
easoni
ngt
hatt
heywoul
dn’
thav
ea
nor
mal
li
fesor
atherwel
ett
hem go”
“
Can’
ttheybesepar
ated?
”
“
Not
heyshar
eev
ery
thi
ngex
cepthear
ts,
ki
dney
sandl
ungs”
“
OhSoxhowi
sshe?
”
“
She’
sshut
ti
ngmeoutIdon’
tknowwhat
t
odo.If
eel
li
keshe’
sbl
ami
ngme.
”
“
EishI
’
m sor
ry.Wheni
sthef
uner
al?
”
“
Wehav
en’
tdeci
ded”
“
I’
mreal
l
ysor
ryt
haty
out
wohav
etogo
t
hrought
hisbest
rongf
oreachot
her
pl
ease”
“
Akangi
funi
nokungi
bonauGugubutI
don’
tbl
ameher
.”(
Doesn’
twantt
osee
me)
“
Kuz
olungay
ezwa”(
It
’sgoi
ngt
obeokay
)
“
Thanky
ou”
“
Yourpr
incesswantt
otal
kwi
thy
ou”
“
Okayhowi
sshe”
“
She’
sokayt
omor
rowwear
egoi
ngback
home”
“
Thanksheav
ens!Gi
vehert
hephone”I
gi
vemydaught
ert
hephoneandshe
t
alkswi
thherf
atherasmymi
nddr
if
t
awaywi
tht
hought
s.Idon’
tknowwhatI
woul
dhav
edonei
fIwasi
nthesame
posi
ti
onhowev
erIunder
standGugu’
s
r
easoni
ngasmuchasIunder
stand
Mpendul
o’s.Guguhasnooneshecan’
t
got
hrought
hisal
one,
sheneedal
lthe
suppor
tshecangetbutI
’
m notsur
eIfI
wantt
obet
hatper
sonaf
terwhatshe
di
dtous.
“
Mamaher
e”Kamar
iasnapsmeoutof
myt
hought
s.It
akemyphoneandputi
t
away
.Mom wal
ksi
nwi
thNando’
spaper
bagandpi
cknpaypl
ast
icbag.
“
Gir
ls”
“
Hel
l
odr
agongr
anny
!”
“
Youl
ookokaymyangel
”shesay
s
put
ti
ngt
hepaperbagandpl
ast
icbagon
t
hebedsi
det
abl
e
“
I’
m okaydr
agongr
annywhatdoy
ou
hav
eforus”
“
Ibr
oughtmommyNando’
sandy
ou
cooki
es”
“
Ahhhwenay
ouar
ethebestgr
anny
y
az”mom smi
l
es.Myboyl
ovesany
thi
ng
t
hati
schi
ckenev
enchi
ckengi
zzar
ds
andl
i
ver
s.
“
Thanksmom”
“
HawuIt
houghty
ouwi
l
lbehappyI
br
oughty
ourcr
avi
ngsormygr
andson
doesn’
twantchi
ckent
oday
?”
“
I’
mfi
nemom I
’
mjustdown”
“
Yini
youandLwandl
ehav
en’
ttal
ked?
”
“
Nowear
ecool
.It
’sGugushecal
l
ed
l
astni
ghtandsai
dshe’
ssor
ry.Shewas
cr
yinghy
ster
ical
l
yaf
tert
hatshe
dr
oppedt
hecal
lnowIj
ustf
oundout
t
hatsheswi
tchedof
fthemachi
nes.
”
“
Ohshamemaant
hisi
ssady
az”
“
YeahMpendul
owant
edt
het
winst
oli
ve
butGugumadeadeci
siont
osett
hem
f
reebecauset
heywon’
tli
veanor
mal
l
i
fe”
“
Iunder
standbot
hoft
hem sot
heyar
e
dead?
”
“
Yes.If
eel
sor
ryf
orhermom sheneeds
suppor
tbutI
’
m notsur
eI’
mthatper
son
whocanbet
her
eforheraf
terwhatshe
di
dtous”
“
It
’sat
oughdeci
sionmybabybut
f
oll
owy
ourhear
tIknowi
tcannev
er
mi
sleady
ou”Isi
gh
“
Wher
e’sDaddy
?”
“
YourDadhasmoodsf
orday
sMi
ra
hai
boayngeke”Il
augh
“
What
’swr
ong?
”
“
Hewant
sust
ogetmar
ri
edandIt
old
hi
mthatcanwewai
tabi
tIdon’
tthi
nk
wear
ereadyf
ormar
ri
age”
“
Hawumamamosy
ouwer
ereadyt
o
mar
ryt
hisman5mont
hsbacknowy
ou
ar
enotr
eady
”
“
Thatwasbef
oreheshowedmet
hathe
doesn’
ttr
ustme”
“
Ithoughty
ouf
orgav
ehi
m nj
ena”
“
Ofcour
sebabybutIr
eal
i
zedt
hat
t
her
e’sal
ott
hatweneedt
oknowabout
eachot
hery
ouknowbef
orej
umpi
ng
i
ntomar
ri
age”
“
Iheary
ousowhenar
eyougoi
ngt
o
mar
ryhi
m?”
“
Febr
uar
y”
“
It
’snotbadatal
lmost
hatt
womont
hs
away
”
“
Exact
lybuthewant
sust
ogetmar
ri
ed
ont
hesamedayasy
our
s.”
“
Itwoul
dbebeaut
if
ulmom butIal
so
under
standy
ourr
easoni
ng”
“
Hay
iKhuz
ani
needt
obepat
ientand
st
opt
hrowi
ngt
ant
rumsl
i
keat
oddl
er”I
l
augh.Il
ovet
hei
rlov
eshamei
t’
sso
beaut
if
ul.

Tal
ki
ngt
omydaught
ereasedmypai
na
bi
t.I
nthi
smomentshe’
stheonl
ythi
ng
t
hatmakesense.Ibl
amemy
sel
ffor
whathappenedt
othet
wins.If
eel
li
kei
f
Iwast
her
efort
hem t
hingswoul
dn’
t
hav
etur
nedt
hewayt
heyar
etoday
.I
t
akeahugebr
eat
heandgobacki
nsi
de
t
hehospi
tal
tocheckonGugu.
“
Goawaypl
ease”
“
Youcan’
tshutmeoutGuguweneed
t
alkaboutt
het
winsf
uner
al”
“
OhIcanandIwi
l
l!
!”
“
Iknowy
ouar
eangr
yandI
’
m sor
ryf
or
ev
ery
thi
ngbutr
ightnowweneedeach
ot
her
”
“
NoIdon’
tneedy
ouMpendul
oyou
negl
ect
edmewhenIneededy
out
he
most
.IknowIwr
ongedy
ouandI
’
m
sor
ryf
ort
hatbutIwi
shy
oudi
dn’
t
puni
shmyboy
saswel
l
.Theydi
dn’
tdo
any
thi
ngwr
ongI
’
mtheonewho
wr
ongedy
ou.I
’
mtheonewhowr
onged
Mi
ra,
Kamar
ia,
Lwandl
e,Mom Bonga,
Uncl
eKandt
heNkosi
fami
l
ynott
hem!
Theyar
einnocentt
heydi
dn’
tdeser
ve
t
his.I
’
mtheonewhoshoul
dbe
puni
shednott
hem!Godi
sunf
airhow
canHebesohear
tl
esst
osmal
lbabi
es!
”
Shel
etoutahear
twr
enchi
ngsob.Iwal
k
cl
oset
oherbedandcomf
ortherbutshe
pushesme
“
It
’sbecauseofy
ouSox
!Ir
egr
etl
ovi
ng
y
oumany
ouar
ether
easonIt
urnedi
nto
t
hisj
eal
ousbi
tt
erbi
tch!Ibet
ray
edmy
oneandonl
yfr
iend,
mysi
sterf
rom
anot
hermot
herf
orwhat
?Fory
ouIwas
af
rai
dtol
osey
ouandal
lthebenef
it
s
y
ouwer
ecomi
ngwi
th.Iwasaf
ool
I
shoul
d’v
eknownt
hatIcannev
erchange
t
hewayy
ouf
eel
aboutmybestf
ri
end.
Youhav
enev
erl
ovedmeMpendul
o
admi
tity
ouj
ustwant
edmebecauseI
wassomet
hingy
oucoul
dhav
ethati
s
cl
oset
oMi
ra.Youusedmeandasf
ool
I
am If
ell
fory
ouhar
dlookwher
eIam
r
ightnowal
lal
one!I
’
m manl
ess!
f
ri
endl
ess!chi
l
dless!homel
ess!buti
t’
s
okayIacceptev
erypai
nasr
awasi
tis.I
deser
vei
tbutIj
ustwi
shmybabi
es
wer
en’
ttheonest
opayt
hepr
ice.
”her
wor
dsf
indapl
acei
nmyhear
tandl
efti
t
bl
eedi
ng.
“
I’
m sor
ryGugupl
easef
orgi
vemef
or
ev
erypai
nIhav
eev
ercausedy
oui
n
y
ourl
i
fe.Iknowi
t’
stool
atebutpl
ease
al
l
owmet
obet
her
efory
ou.Let
’sgo
backhomeandpr
epar
ethef
uner
alf
or
ourboy
s”
“
NoI
’
m notcomi
ngwi
thy
ou.Ir
athergo
backwher
eI’
m bei
ngt
reat
edl
i
keasl
ave
atl
eastwi
tht
hem IknowwhatIam t
o
t
hem.Theydon’
tpr
etendt
olov
eme.I
knowt
hatI
’
mjustasl
avet
othem”
“
Youdon’
tdeser
vet
obet
reat
edl
i
kea
sal
veGuguandy
ouj
ustgav
ebi
rt
hyou
needt
oheal
”
“
Dontactl
i
key
oucar
ecozy
oudon’
t.
Ther
e’snoneedt
odi
scusst
hef
uner
al
I
’
m goi
ngt
ocr
emat
ethem”
“
What
?NoGugui
sitnotenought
hat
y
our
obbedt
hem t
hei
rli
vesnowy
ou
wantt
obur
nthem!
”
“
Play
ingaf
atherwhocar
esnowi
stoo
l
ateSoxj
ustf
uckof
fmaan!
”
“
Youar
enotgoi
ngt
odenymeachance
t
obur
ymyboy
swi
thdi
gni
tyandt
hat
whatI
’
m goi
ngt
odo!
”Ist
orm of
fand
dr
ivet
omymom’
shouse.
“
Mpendul
o”shei
ssur
pri
set
oseeme
andshel
ookssot
hin.Thel
astt
imeI
sawherwas5mont
hsback.
“
Mama”Icoul
dn’
thel
pitbutt
hrow
my
sel
finherar
ms.Webot
hsi
nkont
he
f
loorandshecr
adl
esmei
nherar
msas
Iwai
ll
ikeababy
.Not
hingbeat
smy
mot
her
’sembr
ace,
shedoesn’
tneedt
o
sayawor
dbutherembr
acei
s
ev
ery
thi
ng.

I
t’
sbeen3day
ssi
ncemyboy
spassed
eachdayf
eel
sli
keI
’
m dr
owni
ngdeeper
anddeeper
.Idon’
tregr
ett
hedeci
sionI
madebuti
t’
sdoesn’
thur
tanyl
ess.
Mpendul
o’smom say
sI’
m sel
fi
shabout
t
hedeci
sionImadebutIst
il
lthi
nki
t’
s
t
hebest
.Ihav
ebeenst
ayi
ngwi
tht
hem
t
hesepastt
hreeday
sandIcan’
twai
tfor
t
hef
uner
alt
obeov
ersot
hatIcanl
eav
e
herhouse.Soxhasbeent
ryi
ngt
obe
suppor
ti
vebutIdon’
twantany
thi
ngt
hat
gott
odowi
thhi
m.He’
sachapt
erIwant
t
ocl
osef
orev
eri
nmyl
i
fe.Lov
inghi
m
wasabi
ggestmi
stakeofmyl
i
feIwi
l
l
f
orev
err
egr
et.
“
Heyar
eyoudone?
”Soxsay
sashe
wal
ksi
n.
“
Yes”Il
ookmy
sel
foncemor
eint
he
mi
rr
or.Heboughtmeabl
ackdr
essf
or
t
hef
uner
alandi
t’
sabi
tlosebutIl
ook
goodoni
t.Idon’
thav
est
rengt
hfor
heel
ssoI
’
m onmypumps.
“
It
’st
imet
osaygoodby
etot
hem come”
Het
akesmyhandandIl
ethi
m.Wewal
k
t
othemai
nbedr
oom andIl
ookatmy
boy
sfort
hel
astt
ime,
tear
sst
reami
ng
downmyf
aceaf
tert
hatwegot
othe
t
entout
side.I
’
m sur
pri
sedt
oseeMi
ra
andLwandl
ecomi
ngt
owar
dsus.
“
Sani
bonani
”Lwandl
esay
sI’
m so
ashamedt
oev
enl
ookatt
hem.
“
Heyguy
sthanksf
orcomi
ng”Soxsay
s.
Icanf
eel
Mir
a’sgaz
eonmet
henI
r
emembert
hati
t’
sthef
ir
stt
imeshe
seesmeev
ersi
nceshegai
nhersi
ght
.
“
I’
m sor
ryguy
sforev
ery
thi
ngIhav
e
donet
oy’
al
l”
“
It
’sf
inewear
enother
efort
hatGugu”
Mi
rasay
sasshepul
l
smet
oherar
msI
bur
sti
ntot
ear
s.
“
It
’sokayGugudon’
tcr
y.”Ipul
lbackand
wi
pemyt
ear
sthenwemakeourway
i
nsi
de.Mi
rai
ssqueez
ingmyhand
t
hroughoutt
heser
viceandwi
pingmy
t
ear
s.Ir
eal
l
ydon’
tdeser
vet
hisaf
ter
whatIdi
dtoherbutI
’
m happyshe’
s
her
e.
Whent
hei
rti
nycof
fi
ndescendedt
othe
gr
oundIf
eltapar
tofmedy
ingwi
thmy
boy
s.Imustsayt
hought
hatmyboy
s
ar
ebur
iedwi
thdi
gni
tyonewoul
dswear
t
hatt
heyar
eadul
ts.I
’
m gr
atef
ult
o
Mpendul
ofort
hatbecauseIwoul
dn’
t
hav
ebeenabl
etogi
vet
hem adi
gni
fi
ed
bur
ial
.Mi
rawal
ksi
nwi
tht
wopl
ates,
I’
m
si
tt
ingonMpendul
o’sbedi
nhi
s
bedr
oom heusual
l
yusewhenhe’
s
sl
eepi
ngov
erathi
smom’
s.
“
Her
eeat
”
“
I’
m nothungr
y”
“
Iknowbuty
ouhav
etoeatsomet
hing
Gugupl
ease”Isi
ghandt
aket
hepl
ate.
Shesi
tsnex
ttomeandeat
sli
ke
someonei
sgoi
ngt
otakeawayherf
ood
bef
oreshef
ini
shes.Shel
ooksupatme
andwi
peshermout
h
“
I’
m sor
ryI
…”
“
Don’
tbepl
ease”
“
Ifeel
badt
haty
oul
osty
ourbabi
esand
her
eIam wi
thmypr
egnancyr
emi
nd.
.”I
cutherof
f
“
Don’
tbesi
l
lyMi
ramanj
eyoushoul
d
hi
dey
ourpr
egnancybecauseofmeno
way
s.Iact
ual
l
ydeser
vet
hispai
n”
“
Don’
tsayt
hat
”
“
Buti
t’
str
ueIcausedy
ousomuchpai
n
Mi
raandI
’
m sosor
ry.Iwi
l
lnev
erf
orgi
ve
my
sel
fforwhatIdi
d!Ishoul
dn’
thav
e
t
emper
edwi
thKamar
ia’
sDNAr
esul
tsI
wasaf
rai
dtol
oseSoxandev
ery
thi
ng
t
hathewaspr
ovi
dingmewi
thhowev
er
t
hatdoesnotj
ust
if
ymyact
ions.
”
“
Itol
dyounj
eGugut
hatIdon’
twanthi
m
y
ouwer
esupposedt
otr
ustme”
“
Iknowsi
sIknowt
het
hingi
shel
oves
y
ouandIt
houghtbydoi
ngwhatIdi
d
wi
l
lkeephi
m awayf
rom y
oubutIwas
j
ustf
ool
i
ngmy
sel
fbecauset
hatwasn’
t
goi
ngt
omakehi
mlov
eme.I
’
mreal
l
y
sor
ryIknowt
hatIdon’
tdeser
vey
our
f
orgi
venessbutIwanty
out
oknowt
hat
t
hisapol
ogyi
ssi
ncer
efr
om t
hedept
hof
myhear
t.
”
“
Youhur
tmesomuchIt
houghtwewer
e
si
ster
sandwegoteachot
her
’sback
Gugu.
”Wear
ebot
hcr
yingnow
“
IknowI
’
m sor
ry.Iwassel
fi
shcr
uel
and
bi
tt
erpl
easef
orgi
veme.Imi
ssy
ouso
muchMi
ra.It
hinkabouty
ouev
ery
day
andt
hegoodt
imeswehadt
oget
her
.I
knowt
haty
oucannev
ert
akemeback
andt
rustmeagai
nbutal
lIwanti
sto
heary
ousayy
ouf
orgi
vemet
henmy
soul
wil
lresti
npeaceknowi
ngt
haty
ou
f
orgav
eme”shel
ooksatme
“
Whatdoy
oumeany
oursoul
canRest
I
nPeace”
“
Mir
ather
e’snol
i
fef
ormeany
mor
e.My
babi
eswer
ether
eonl
yreasonIhol
don
butnowt
heyar
egone.I
’
mti
redoft
his
pai
nit
’st
oomuchIhav
elostev
ery
thi
ng.
Il
ostmyf
ami
l
y,mybestf
ri
end,
myman
andmyboy
s.Ihav
enot
hingt
oli
vef
or”
“
Youcanl
i
vef
ory
our
sel
fGugu”
“
Ihav
edonehor
ri
blet
hingsi
nmyl
i
feI
’
m
notwor
thyt
obet
her
easont
oli
vef
or”
“
Thenl
i
vef
orme”shepl
acesherf
ood
ont
hebedandt
akesmyhandsi
ntoher
s
“
Liv
eforme,
Iwi
l
lfor
giv
eyoui
fyouar
e
notgoi
ngt
ogi
veupony
ourl
i
fe.Noone
i
sper
fectGuguandweal
ldeser
vea
secondchance.Letmegi
vey
oua
secondchancei
nret
urny
ouwi
l
lgi
ve
y
our
sel
fasecondchance”
“
Your
eal
l
ymeant
hat
?”
“
Yes”shenodsv
igor
ousl
y
“
OhMi
rat
hanky
ousomuch”Isqueez
e
heri
nar
msandshehol
dsmet
ight
ly
“
I’
m her
efory
ouokay
.”Fort
hef
ir
stt
ime
i
nmont
hsIcanf
eel
thatsomeonei
s
r
eal
l
yher
eformeandI
’
m notal
one.

Hi
sey
esar
erol
l
ingbackandhe’
s
maki
ngal
lther
ightnoi
ses.Icanf
eel
his
cockmassagi
ngmyt
onsi
l
s,het
ight
en
hi
shol
donmyheadandgr
owl
sashe
r
eleaseshi
ssemeni
nmyt
hroat
.
“
Ohshi
t!
”Iswal
l
owandcr
awl
ont
opof
hi
m,heopenshi
sey
esl
azi
l
y.
“
Mor
ningDaddyK”
“
Mor
ningmyJaan”Hecr
adl
esmyf
ace
andki
ssesme
“
IknowIhav
ebeeni
mpossi
blet
hese
day
sandI
’
m sor
ryokay,
I
t’
sfi
newewi
l
l
getmar
ri
edi
nFebr
uar
y”
“
Thanky
ousomuchnowcanIhav
emy
daddyKbackt
hegr
umpyonei
s
annoy
ing”
“
Uthi
Im annoy
ingBonga?
”
“
NoI
…”
“
Thenwhyar
eyouher
eifI
’
m annoy
ing
y
ou?
”
“
BabycomeonI
..
”Hepushesmeaway
f
rom hi
m andr
oll
soutofbed,
headi
ng
t
othebat
hroom.Gr
eat
!It
houghtt
he
bl
owj
obwor
kednowbackt
osquar
e
oneay
!Igetupf
rom t
hebedandpul
l
mygownt
henmaket
hebed.Iheara
t
inyknockont
hedoor
“
Comei
n”Emi
hleandKamar
iawal
ksi
n.
Theyl
ookf
ri
ght
en.
“
What
’swr
ongbabi
es.
”
“
MommyAunt
yis.
..
she…”Emi
hle
st
utt
ers.Iwal
ktot
hem
“
Kwenz
enj
ani
?”
“
Ther
e’sawomanwhohasbl
ood
dr
agongr
annyshe’
scr
ying”
“
Who’
sthatEmi
hle”
“
It
’sAunt
yKhany
iMommy
”Khany
i?I
r
usht
othebat
hroom
“
Theki
dssayKhany
isi
l
eisher
e”
“
Whati
sshedoi
ngher
e”Ican’
tmi
sst
he
shocki
nhi
svoi
ce.Heget
soutoft
he
showerandgr
absat
owel
thenf
oll
ow
me.Theki
dsar
est
il
lroot
edont
hedoor
shi
ver
ing.Igi
veKhi
sgownandpush
i
nst
henwewal
ktot
hel
ounge.Wef
ind
hergr
oani
ngont
hecouchbl
ood
oooz
ingoutf
rom herst
omach.
“
Khany
iwhat
’sar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”K
asksi
nshock
“
Hewant
stoki
l
lmeSpi
j
omspl
easehel
p
me”
“
Emi
hlet
akeKamar
iaandgot
oyour
bedr
oom”shedoesasIsay
“
Who”
“
Spi
derhe.
..
he.
..
please.
..
.Het
ookour
boySpi
j
omspl
easesav
ehi
m bef
orehe
ki
l
lshi
m ngi
yakucel
a”I
’
m st
uckon“
our
”
whatdoest
hatsupposet
omean?
CHAPTER79
(
Unedi
ted)

Ican’
tst
opmyt
ear
sfr
om f
all
i
ng,
wear
e
l
yi
ngonMpendul
o’sbedsky
war
dand
Gugui
stel
l
ingmehowt
oughl
i
fehas
beenf
orheri
nthesemont
hs.
“
Theyar
ecr
uel
howcant
heyt
reaty
ou
l
i
ket
hatknowi
ngy
ouwer
epr
egnant
”
“
Ideser
vedev
erypai
nIwentt
hrough
andst
il
lgoi
ngt
hrough”
“
Iwi
shy
oucoul
dst
opsay
ingt
haty
az.
”
“
Buti
t’
str
ue.Doy
out
hinky
ourf
ami
l
y
wi
l
lev
erf
orgi
vemeespeci
all
yLwandl
e
andMom Bonga”
“
Yesev
ery
onedeser
veasecondchance
Gugu”
“
Idon’
tdeser
vet
hatsecondchance.
Yout
rust
edmeMi
raandwewer
e
supposedt
obehappyandcel
ebr
ate
y
ourr
etur
nbutIwasbusyhat
ingony
ou
f
ornor
easont
othepoi
ntt
hatIkept
y
ourdaught
erawayf
rom herf
ather
”
“
Youwer
escar
edt
oloseMpendul
o”
“
Butst
il
lthatdoesn’
tjust
if
ymyact
ions
Mi
ra.Ishoul
dhav
esatdownwi
thSox
andt
ell
him myf
ear
s.”
“
Truey
oual
l
owedy
oursi
tuat
iont
o
change
whoy
ouar
e.Youwer
enev
ert
hisbi
tt
er
andcr
uel
Gugu.Iwassosur
pri
sedand
di
sappoi
ntedt
haty
oudi
dthatl
etal
one
t
omey
ourbestf
ri
end”
“
I’
m sor
ryI
’
mver
ysor
ry.Ishoul
dhav
e
handl
edt
hingsbet
ter
.WhatIdi
disv
ery
cr
uel
andy
ouwi
l
lnev
ert
rustmeagai
n
butI
’
m happyt
haty
ouar
egi
vi
ngmea
secondchance.
”Shesnuggl
escl
osert
o
meandIhol
dher
.Itwi
l
ltakef
orev
erf
or
met
otr
ustheragai
nandI
’
m notev
en
sur
ewhatI
’
m doi
ngi
sri
ghtbutIbel
i
eve
i
nsecondchances.IhopeIwon’
tregr
et
t
hisshame.
“
Sowher
ear
eyougoi
ngt
ost
ay?
”
“
Khosi
’
shouse”
“
Wit
hthosepeopl
ethatt
reaty
oul
i
ke
di
rt
?”
“
Ihav
enowher
etogoMi
raatl
eastI
hav
ear
oofov
ermyheadandf
oodt
o
eat
.That
’swhatIl
i
keaboutt
hem t
hey
don’
tst
arv
eme.
”
“
Comewi
thmet
oJohannesbur
g”she
pul
l
sherheadupandl
ooksatmewi
th
shock
“
Comewi
thy
ouandst
aywi
thy
ou?
”I
can’
tbr
inghercl
oset
omyf
ami
l
y
especi
all
ytomydaught
erasy
etwewi
l
l
t
akei
tsl
owl
yunt
ilI
’
m sur
ethatshe’
s
t
rust
wor
thyagai
n.
“
Nomyapar
tmenti
snotenought
o
accommodat
eal
lofust
her
ear
etwo
bedr
oomsonebel
ongt
omymom and
onet
omy
sel
f.Iwi
l
lgety
ouan
apar
tment
”
“
ButIdon’
thav
emoneyt
opayt
her
ent
”
“
Don’
twor
ryaboutt
hatIwi
l
ltakecar
eof
ev
ery
thi
ng”
“
NoMi
raIcan’
tacceptal
loft
hisIdon’
t
deser
vei
tandi
t’
stoomuch”sheshakes
herheadv
igor
ousl
ytear
sst
reami
ng
downherf
ace
“
Youcanandy
ouwi
l
l”
“
But
…”
“
Ther
e’snobutGuguy
ouar
ecomi
ng
wi
thmet
omor
rowokay
”
“
No”
“
Yes!St
opcr
yingokay
”Ipul
lhert
omy
chestandcomf
orther
.Ther
e’saknock
ont
hedoor
.
“
Comei
n”Ishout
.Myf
iancéwal
ksi
n.
“
Babyy
oust
il
lgood?
”
“
Yes”
“
It
’st
imet
ogonowmom i
swhi
ningshe
can’
twai
ttoseey
ou”wear
ri
vedl
ast
ni
ghtandsl
epti
nahot
elbutmom and
Kamar
iaar
ri
ved2day
sback.Theyar
eat
uncl
e’
sKhouse.
“
Okaynopr
obl
em st
handwasami
”Gugu
get
supf
rom meandwi
peshert
ear
s.
“
Letmehel
pyou”Heputonmyshoes
f
ir
stt
henhel
pmeup.
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
canwet
alk.
”Gugu
say
s
“
NoGuguIhav
etogonow”Il
ookathi
m
buthedoesn’
tbar
ge.GuguandIhug
t
henwel
eav
eaf
tersay
inggoodby
eto
Mpendul
o.
“
Baby
”Hel
ooksatme
“
Yes”
“
Thanky
ouf
oraccompany
ingmeher
e
i
t’
smeansal
ott
ome”
“
Any
thi
ngf
ory
oubaby
”
“
Doy
out
hinkt
her
ewi
l
lev
erbeachance
t
haty
ouf
orgi
veher
?”
“
Idon’
tknowDol
l
face,
uGugumademe
bel
i
eveKamar
iai
smi
neshehur
tsme
baby
”
“
Iknowst
handwasami
andI
’
m sor
ry”
“
Idon’
twantherneary
ouorKamar
ia
she’
sdanger
ouswhati
fshehar
m my
daught
er?Whati
fshebecomej
eal
ous
ofourr
elat
ionshi
panddosomet
hingt
o
y
ouandmyboy
?Ihopet
hiswast
hel
ast
t
imeweseeher
”Iswal
l
owhar
d
“
Umm Iof
fer
edherapl
acet
ost
ay,
she’
s
l
eav
ingwi
thust
omor
row”
“
What
?”
“
Babyshegotnooneandshe’
s
homel
ess”
“
It
’snotourbusi
nessMi
ra”
“
Babypl
ease…”
“
NoMi
ra,
youar
enotof
fer
ingherany
pl
aceandshe’
snotcomi
ngwi
thus
t
omor
rowf
ini
shandkl
aar
!”
“
Cuddl
eCa…”
“
Mir
angi
yal
i
bekauy
ali
bekauf
una
ukukhal
ayi
ni?
”(I
’
mtal
ki
ngandy
ouar
e
backchat
ti
ngy
ouwantt
ocr
y)Ishake
myheadno.
“
Good”

Howi
spossi
blet
haty
ouhur
tsomeone
butt
heyf
indi
teasyt
ofor
giv
eyouand
gi
vey
ouachance.Mi
racl
eisr
eal
l
yan
angel
sentf
rom abov
e.I
’
m soashamed
t
oacceptherhel
pIdon’
tdeser
vei
tbut
she’
sinsi
sti
ng.Iwon’
tli
ethoughand
sayI
’
m notl
ooki
ngf
orwar
dtoi
t,may
beI
canf
indaj
obt
hatsi
deev
eni
fIcanbe
cl
eanerIdon’
tmi
nd.Ican’
tex
pecthert
o
pr
ovi
demeashel
ter
,foodandcl
othes.
I
’
mver
ygr
atef
ulf
ort
hechanceshe’
s
gi
vi
ngmeandI
’
m notgoi
ngt
omessi
t
up.Iwi
l
lspendev
erysi
ngl
edayofmy
l
i
feshowi
ngherandherf
ami
l
yhow
sor
ryIam f
orwhatIdi
d.
“
CanIcomei
n”Il
ookathi
m andnod.
Hemakeshi
swayi
nandsi
tsont
hebed.
“
Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
”
“
I’
m st
il
lbr
eat
hing”
“
That
’swhati
mpor
tanthey
”
“
Yeah.
..
lookI
’
m sor
rySoxf
orev
ery
thi
ng
Ihav
edonet
oyou.Iwi
shonedayy
ou
canf
indi
tiny
ourhear
ttof
orgi
veme”
“
Iwon’
tli
etoy
ouGuguI
’
m st
il
langr
y
andhur
tsf
orwhaty
oudi
d.Mydaught
er
doesn’
tknowt
hatI
’
m herr
eal
dad
becauseofwhaty
oudi
dbutI
’
m wi
l
li
ng
t
olett
hisgoandst
artaf
resh.Come
backhomel
et’
sfi
xourmar
ri
age”Ican’
t
hi
demyshockIwasn’
tex
pect
ingt
his.
“
Thanky
ousomuchbutl
etf
acei
t
Mpendul
oyoudon’
tlov
eme”
“
Idol
ovey
ouGugu”
“
Noy
ounoty
oul
oveMi
ra”
“
Mir
adoesn’
tlov
eme”
“
Ifshel
ovesy
oubacky
ouwoul
dbewi
th
herr
ightnow.I
’
mjusty
oursecondbest
.
It
hinki
t’
sbet
terwegosepar
ateway
s.I
l
ovey
ouIr
eal
l
ydol
ovey
oubutIdon’
t
wantt
obey
oursecondbest
.Iwant
someonewhocanl
ovemet
hewayI
l
ovehi
mifnotmor
e.”
“
Icanl
ovey
oumor
e”
“
May
bey
oucanbutasl
ongasMi
rai
s
st
il
li
nyourhear
tyouwon’
t.Youal
so
deser
vet
obehappywi
thsomeonewho
l
ovesy
ouandv
icev
ersa.Ibel
i
eveour
soul
mat
esar
eyett
ocome”Hel
ayon
t
hebednex
ttomeandpul
l
smet
ohi
s
chest
.OhhowImi
sst
his,
lyi
ngonhi
s
chestandwr
appedi
nhi
sar
msbutIcan
keeponf
ool
i
ngmy
sel
f.
“
Thi
sisi
t”
“
YeahandI
’
m sor
ryDl
ami
ni”
“
It
’sokayMaNcube”wef
all
int
osi
l
ence
andIt
akei
nhi
scal
mingscent
.
“
Sox
”
“
Yes”
“
Thanky
ousomuchf
orev
ery
thi
ngy
ou
hav
edonef
orme.Ir
eal
l
yappr
eci
ate
ev
eryef
for
tandt
hanky
ouf
orgi
vi
ngour
boy
sadi
gni
fi
edbur
ial
”
“
Don’
tment
ioni
t.If
eel
responsi
blef
or
ev
ery
thi
ngy
az”
“
Nodon’
tit
’smyf
aul
tandI
’
m sor
ryt
hat
y
ouhav
etogot
hrought
hispai
n
becauseofmysel
fi
shnessandcr
uel
ty”
“
Butmay
bei
fIwast
her
efory
ouand
t
hem noneoft
hiswoul
dhav
e
happened”
“
Nonot
hingwoul
d’v
echangedSox
.
Zane’
sAunt
ydi
dsayt
hatIhav
etot
ell
y
out
het
rut
hifi
t’
sal
readynott
ool
ate.I
guesst
hatwhatshemeantsowhet
her
y
ouwer
ether
eornott
heywer
est
il
l
goi
ngt
osuf
fer
.Comet
othi
nkoft
his
i
t’
smakessensewhi
l
eIsepar
atedy
ou
andy
ourdaught
erIwasbusyt
ryi
ngt
o
makeababywi
thy
ou.I
’
m sor
rySox
pl
easef
orgi
veme”Hebr
eat
hsoutl
oudl
y
“
It
’sokayGugunoonei
sper
fectand
somet
imeswel
etouremot
ionsand
f
ear
sgett
hebet
terofus.Doy
out
hink
t
heywi
l
lev
erf
orgi
vemef
ornegl
ect
ing
y
ouandt
hem”
“
Ithi
nkt
heyal
readyf
orgav
eyouaf
teral
l
y
oudi
dn’
tjustnegl
ectt
hem wi
thouta
r
eason.
”
“
Yout
hinkso”
“
Yes.
..
I’
mleav
ingf
orJohannesbur
g
t
omor
rowsoIwaswonder
ingaboutt
he
di
vor
ceandev
ery
thi
ng”
“
Johannesbur
gtoy
ourf
ami
l
y?”
“
Nowi
thMi
rasheof
fer
edmean
apar
tmentt
ost
ay”
“
Ohokaydon’
twor
ryIwi
l
ldeal
wit
hthat
f
ornowIj
ustwantt
omour
nmyboy
s”
“
OkayIheary
ouandI
’
m sor
ryonce
agai
n”
“
Heyheyst
opi
tnow”Hemakesmel
ook
athi
m wi
thhi
sindexf
ingeronmychi
n.
“
CanIadmi
tthatImi
ssedy
ou”Ismi
l
e
“
Imi
ssedy
out
ooev
erysi
ngl
eday
”He
dr
opshi
sheadandourl
i
pscol
l
ide,
we
shar
eadeepi
ntenseki
ss.

I
’
m notsur
eIhear
dhercor
rect
lywhat
does“
ourboy
”supposedt
omean.She’
s
i
nsomuchpai
nandbl
oodooz
ingout
f
rom herst
omach.I
’
m notsur
eifshe
wasshotorst
abbed.
“
Whydon’
tyougot
othepol
i
ceKhany
i”I
sayt
oher
“
Hav
eyouf
orgot
tenwhoi
sSpi
der
?That
mani
sbumpi
ngshoul
der
swi
tht
he
pol
i
ce”
“
She’
slosi
ngt
oomuchbl
oodKIt
hink
weshoul
dtakehert
othehospi
tal
”
Bongasay
s
“
Nonohospi
tal
pleasehewi
l
lfi
ndme
t
her
eandki
l
lme.
”
“
Buty
ouwi
l
ldi
eher
e,y
ouar
elosi
ngt
oo
muchbl
ood”Isay
“
Cal
lyourdoct
orpl
easeI
’
m beggi
ngy
ou
Spi
j
omsandt
ell
himt
ocomeher
e.”
“
Arey
oushotorst
abbed?
”
“
Shot
”Shegr
oansi
npai
n.
Theamountofbl
oodshe’
slosi
ngi
s
wor
ryi
ngme.Il
ookatmyj
aanandshe
nodsherhead.Igot
omybedr
oom t
o
f
etchmyphone.If
indmi
ssedcal
l
sfr
om
Sci
ssor
,he’
sther
easonIhav
ebeen
st
ressedoutl
atel
yit
’st
imet
oret
urnt
he
f
avorandI
’
m notr
eadyf
ort
hat
.Ical
lmy
doct
orandhet
ell
smet
hathe’
scomi
ng
sol
ongwemustwr
apsomet
hing
ar
oundt
hewoundt
ost
opt
hebl
ood
f
rom f
lowi
ng.It
akemyt
-shi
rtandwal
k
backt
othel
i
vingr
oom.
“
He’
sont
hewayl
et’
swr
apt
hegunshot
woundt
odecr
easet
hepr
essur
eof
bl
oodf
low”Iwr
apherst
omachwi
tht
he
hel
pofBongat
henwel
etherl
i
eont
he
couch.
“
Tel
luswhathappenedKhany
isi
l
e”
Bongasay
sassheset
tl
esdownon
anot
hercouch.
“
Iknewt
hatt
hisdaywoul
dcomebutI
nev
ert
houghti
twoul
dbet
oosoon”
“
Stopbeat
ingar
oundt
hebushandgo
st
rai
ghtt
othepoi
ntwhatdi
dyoumean
wheny
ousai
dourboy
”Ishout
s
“
Becausehei
syoursonSpi
j
oms”Il
augh
v
eryhar
d
“
Youar
ecr
azyy
ouj
ustwantmet
ohel
p
y
ousav
eyoursonf
rom Spi
der
!”
“
Ithoughthe’
sKhumal
o’sson”Bonga
adds
“
Iwasal
readypr
egnantwhenIsl
ept
wi
thhi
m butIdi
dn’
tknow”she’
sget
ti
ng
weakerbyeachsecondbutIneed
answer
sbef
oreshepassesout
.
“
I’
m notf
oll
owi
ngsoy
out
wower
e
f
ucki
ng?
”Bongasay
slooki
ngatme.
“
Nowewer
en’
tfucki
ngi
thappened
onceandwewer
edr
unk”Khany
isay
s
“
Ohwowr
eal
l
yK”
“
BabyIdon’
tknowwhatshe’
stal
ki
ng
abouty
eswegotdr
unkandIdon’
t
r
ememberhal
foft
het
hingsaboutt
hat
ni
ghtbutf
ucki
nghel
lno!
”
“
Wedi
dSpi
j
oms…”
“
Yousai
dwedi
dn’
tnj
eKhany
isi
l
e!”
“
HowwasIgoi
ngt
otel
lyout
het
rut
h
af
tert
hewayy
our
eact
ed?
”Ishakemy
headi
ndi
sbel
i
eft
hiscan’
tbehappeni
ng
no!
!!
“
NonounamangaKhany
isi
l
e!”(
Youar
e
l
yi
ng)
“
Youwer
edi
sgust
edbyt
het
houghtof
sl
eepi
ngwi
thmeSpi
j
omsy
oumademe
f
eel
li
keI
’
mrepul
siv
ebecauseIwas
r
aped”
“
That
’snott
rueKhany
isi
l
eIt
reat
edy
ou
l
i
kemyl
i
ttl
esi
stersot
houghtof
sl
eepi
ngwi
thmyl
i
ttl
esi
sterwas
f
reaki
ngmeoutandI
…”
“
Lit
tl
esi
stermyl
eftpar
aly
zedf
oot
!I
l
ovedy
ouSpi
j
omssomuchbutal
lyou
coul
dseei
nmewasadamagedl
i
ttl
e
gi
rl
.It
ri
edsohar
dtoshowy
ouhow
muchIl
ovedy
oubuty
oucoul
dn’
tcar
e.I
t
houghtaf
terNol
i
tha’
spassi
ngIwi
l
l
hav
eal
lyourat
tent
iont
omy
sel
fbut
i
nst
eady
oust
art
edgi
vi
nghoesy
our
at
tent
ionl
eftr
ightandcent
er.Doy
ou
knowhowdi
dthatshi
tbr
okeme?I
twas
aconf
ir
mat
iont
hatI
’
mtoodamagedf
or
y
ou!It
ri
edt
omakepeacewi
tht
hatunt
il
t
hatni
ghty
oumadel
ovet
omesogood
andIt
houghtf
inal
l
yIgothi
m onl
yto
f
oundouty
ouwer
edi
sgust
edbyt
he
t
houghtofy
ouandmef
ucki
ng.Ihadt
o
pr
otectmy
sel
fal
readybr
okenhear
t
af
tery
ourr
eact
ionandsaywedi
dn’
t
hav
esex
”Il
ookatBongawhohast
ear
s
i
nherey
es
“
BabyI
..
.Idon’
tbel
i
eveher
!Hersonnot
mysoni
tcan’
tbe!Khany
iispl
ayi
ngwi
th
ourf
eel
i
ngs!I
fhe’
smychi
l
dthenwhy
di
dyoukeephi
m awayf
rom me!
!”
“
Iwasscar
edy
ouwi
l
ltakehi
m away
f
rom meSpi
j
oms.I
fitwasn’
tforBonga
y
ouwoul
dhav
eki
l
ledme!
”
“
AndKhumal
oyena?Washeapar
tof
y
ourr
evengeor
?”Bongaaskswi
th
cr
acki
ngv
oice
“
Hewaspar
tofr
evengebutt
hewayhe
t
reat
edmewasdi
ff
erent
.Hemademe
f
eel
sospeci
al,
att
ract
iveandl
ovedy
ou
knowandhi
ssexgameohbl
esshi
s
soul
”shechuckl
essof
tl
y
“
Siphosot
handoi
syoursonKhuz
ani
Msi
mangoy
ouneedt
osav
ehi
m bef
ore
i
t’
stool
ate.Spi
derf
eel
sbet
ray
ed
becauset
her
easonher
escuedmef
rom
y
our“
pri
son”i
sbecausehet
houghthe
i
sKhumal
o’s.Iwasaf
rai
dtot
ell
himt
he
t
rut
hbecausehewasgoi
ngt
oki
l
lus.I
don’
tknowhowhef
oundoutbutIt
hink
hesuspect
edbecauset
hemor
ehe
gr
owshe’
slooki
ngmor
eli
key
out
hen
me”Bongaget
supandwal
ksawayI
f
oll
owher
.
“
Baby
”
“
Yini
Khuz
ani
!”
“
Don’
tbel
i
eveherKhany
iis
mani
pul
ati
ve”
“
Didy
ounotsl
eepwi
thher
?”
“
Idon’
trememberBongabutIdon’
t
t
hinkso”
“
Ist
her
ewomany
ouhav
enev
ersl
ept
wi
thKhuz
ani
?”
“
BabyKhany
iwantt
ocauset
roubl
e
bet
weenusmay
bet
hisi
sherr
evengeor
may
bet
heyar
ewor
kingt
oget
herwi
th
Spi
der
.Thi
sispar
toft
hei
rpl
an”
“
Whati
fshe’
snotKwhywoul
dtheyt
ake
al
lthesemont
hs”
“
May
bet
heywant
edt
ocat
chuswhen
wer
en’
tex
pect
ingst
handwasami
.”
“
Idon’
tknowKhuz
ani
Ireal
l
ydon’
t
know”sheat
tempt
stowal
kawaybutI
hol
dher
“
Tel
lmewegoi
ngt
osur
viv
ethi
spl
ease”
shel
ooksdownandIcr
adl
esherf
ace
“
Babyl
ookatme”shel
ooksupatme
andherey
esgl
i
stenwi
tht
ear
s
“
Thi
sisat
rapIcanf
eel
it”
“
Whati
fit
’snot
?Whati
fhe’
sreal
l
yyour
son?
”shewhi
sper
sast
ear
sfal
ldown
herf
ace.
“
Not
hingwi
l
lchangeBonga…”
“
Ever
ythi
ngwi
l
lchangeKhuz
ani
youwi
l
l
f
inal
l
yhav
ethesony
ouhav
ebeen
l
ongi
ngf
orwi
thmyni
ece!Doy
ouknow
howt
hatmakesmef
eel
?What
happenedt
oshe’
smyl
i
ttl
esi
sterny
we
ny
wey
ouf
uckedherdammi
t!
!”She
y
anksmyhandsawayf
rom herf
ace
“
Cel
awehl
i
seumoy
a”(
pleasecal
m
down)
“
Cal
m downmyf
oot
!Fi
rsti
twasKhosi
t
hent
hatwomenZi
khal
iki
l
lednowi
t’
s
Khany
i!Who’
snex
thuh?Howmany
womendoIhav
etodeal
wit
hunt
ilIcan
hav
epeace?
”
“
Babypl
easel
et’
stal
kaboutt
hiscal
mly
”
“
Khuz
ani
Icantt
aket
hisi
t’
stoomuch.I
f
eel
li
keIwi
l
lnev
erhav
epeacewi
thy
ou.
Ther
e’sal
way
sgonnabeawomant
hat
wi
l
lpopupandcauseast
rai
ninour
r
elat
ionshi
p”
“
Whydoesi
tal
way
stakey
ousoeasi
l
y
t
ogi
veuponmeonus?DoImean
any
thi
ngt
oyouBonga?
”
“
Howdar
eyouaskmet
hat
?”
“
NoIneedt
oknowr
eal
l
yNokubongaI
f
eel
li
keI
’
mInv
est
ingt
oomuchofmy
f
eel
i
ngst
osomeonewho’
snotev
en
seei
ngaf
utur
ewi
thme.Ev
ery
timewe
f
ighty
ouwantt
oendt
hingsbet
weenus.
DoImat
tert
oyou?Doy
our
eal
l
ylov
e
me?
”
“
Bel
i
evewhaty
ouwantt
obel
i
eveI
’
m
l
eav
ing!
”
“
Ify
oul
eav
ejustknowt
haty
ouandIar
e
t
hrough!
”Iwat
chherasshepackher
cl
othescr
yingIt
houghtshewi
l
lpr
ove
mewr
ongandst
ay.Onceshe’
sdone
shecal
l
soutf
orKamar
iaandchange
herpj
sthent
heyl
eav
eI’
mtempt
edt
o
st
opherbutIcan’
thav
eawomanwho
al
way
swantt
oleav
emewhenev
erwe
encount
erpr
obl
ems.
HappyBi
rt
hdayI
nAdv
anceKar
abôh
Mż
ęęh

CHAPTER80
(
unedi
ted)

Myhappi
nessi
sal
way
sshor
tli
vedandI
t
houghtaf
tert
hecer
emonyt
hingswoul
d
bebet
terbuti
t’
sseemsl
i
kebadl
ucki
s
st
il
lfol
l
owi
ngme.It
houghtt
hings
bet
weenKandIar
egoi
ngt
ogo
smoot
hlynowbuther
ecomesKhany
i
cl
aimi
ngt
ohav
easonwi
thhi
m.Ican
f
eel
iti
nmybonest
hatt
hissoni
sreal
l
y
hi
s,t
hesont
hatIhav
ebeendeny
inghi
m.
Iknowt
hatwewer
en’
ttoget
herwhenhe
wasf
ucki
nghoesl
eftr
ightandcent
er
butI
’
mti
redofhi
spastpoppi
ngup
ev
erynowandt
hent
othr
eat
enmy
happi
nesswi
thhi
m.Il
ovehi
m Ir
eal
l
ydo
buthowmuchmor
ecanIt
ake?We
ar
ri
veatt
hehot
elandchecki
nthenI
or
derbr
eakf
astandwi
ne.
“
Dragongr
annyI
’
m st
arv
ing”
“
Breakf
asti
scomi
ngsweet
hear
t”
“
Whyar
eweher
eyouandKhul
usai
d
y
ouwi
l
ltakemeandEmyt
oShaka
wor
ldt
oday
”
“
Grannyi
snotf
eel
i
ngwel
lbabygi
rl
”she
cr
ossesherar
msagai
nstherchestand
sul
k
“
Iwi
l
lmakei
tupt
oyousweet
hear
t”
“
HaaaGogobuty
oudon’
tlooksi
ckt
o
me!
”
“
Heydon’
trai
sey
ourv
oiceatme!
”
“
Iwantmommy
”Igetupf
rom t
hecouch
t
oat
tendt
hedoorI
t’
sther
oom ser
vice.
“
Ourf
oodi
sher
elet
’seat
”Igi
veher
f
oodbutsheshakesherhead
“
I’
m nothungr
y”
“
Yousai
dyouar
ehungr
ymos”
“
Iwantmymommy
!”
“
Yourmom i
satt
hef
uner
ali
fyoudon’
t
wantt
oeatt
heny
ouwi
l
lst
arv
etodeat
h
mygi
rl
.Idon’
thav
eti
met
onur
sey
our
l
i
ttl
eat
ti
tude”Ipourmy
sel
fagl
assof
wi
neandset
tl
eont
hecoucht
henwat
ch
t
v.IknowIshoul
dn’
tbedr
inki
ngbutI
can’
thel
pit
.Ineedt
onumbt
hepai
nin
myhear
t.It
houghthewashewasgoi
ng
t
obegmet
ost
aybuthewat
chedme
packmybel
ongi
ngsandev
encl
oset
he
doorbehi
ndme.Nowt
hathehasason
hehasbeenl
ongi
ngf
orhedoesn’
tneed
me.Theyar
egoi
ngt
obeper
fectf
ami
l
y!
Ipourmy
sel
f3gl
assesofwi
ne
r
espect
ivel
yandgul
pal
loft
hem down.
Kamar
iat
akesherf
oodandsi
tsdown
t
hef
loort
heneat
s.
“
Woz
angi
zokuf
unz
a”(
comel
et’
sme
f
eedy
ou)Sheget
supf
rom t
hef
loorand
Ipul
lheronmyl
apt
henf
eedher
.
“
Wheni
smommycomi
ngback”
“
Eatf
ir
stIwi
l
lcal
lherandt
ell
hert
o
f
etchy
ou”
“
Andwewi
l
lgot
oGogoz
inehIwantt
o
seemychi
ckens”
“
Yesbabygi
rlI
’
m sur
eSnoi
staki
ng
goodcar
eofy
ourchi
ckens”
“
Whydon’
twecomewi
tht
hem i
nour
houseGogo”
“
Becauset
heyar
enot
al
l
owed.
..
khami
sa”(
openy
ourmout
h)
sheopenshermout
handIf
eedher
.
OnceI
’
m donef
eedi
ngherIcont
inue
wi
thmywi
newhi
l
ecal
l
ingmydaught
er.
“
Mommy
”
“
Youst
il
latt
hef
uner
al”
“
Nowear
eont
hewayt
otheNkosi
househol
d”
“
Youneedt
ocomeandf
etchKa.
..
Ka
Mar
ia”
“
Okaybutar
eyouokay
?”
“
I.
..
yescomet
o**
**hot
el”
“
Mom ar
eyoudr
unk?Whatar
eyou
doi
ngt
her
e”
“
Woz
a!”(
Come)Ihangup.YesI
’
m abi
t
dr
unkbutIf
eel
sosi
ckIdon’
tknowi
fit
’s
t
hiswi
neori
t’
sbecauseIdr
ankwi
than
empt
yst
omach.
“
Gogoar
eyouokay
?”
“
I’
mf.
.f
ine.Yourmom i
scomi
ngt
ofet
ch
y
ou”If
ini
sht
hel
astcont
entofmywi
ne
andr
estont
hecouchwhi
l
eKamar
ia
wat
chessomecar
toons.
“
Gogot
her
e’ssomeoneont
hedoor
”it
’s
awhi
l
elat
erwhenKamar
iasnapsme
out
.Igetupf
rom t
hecouchandshuf
fl
e
myf
eett
othedoor
.Mi
rasni
ff
smet
he
momentsheget
sin
“
Mom y
ouwer
edr
inki
ng!
”
“
Haymusaukungt
het
hisaI
’
m noty
our
chi
l
d!”(
Don’
tshoutatme)
“
Greet
ingsmom Bonga”
“
Hel
l
oBoy
”
“
Mommy
!Daddy
!”Kamar
iar
unst
othem
andLwandl
elwenkosi
picksherupand
ki
ssesher
“
Youf
ini
shedt
hewhol
ebot
tl
emom!
”
“
Mir
ast
opshout
ingatme!
”
“
Babycany
oupl
easet
akeKamar
iaIwi
l
l
f
indy
ouguy
sint
hecar
”Lwandl
enods
andsaygoodby
etomet
henwal
ksout
wi
thKamar
ia.
“
Mom af
teral
lthesemont
hswi
thout
dr
inki
ngal
cohol
whathappenednow”
shehel
psmet
othecouchandweset
tl
e
ont
hecouch
“
I’
mfi
ne”
“
Noy
ouar
enotf
inewhyar
eyouher
e?
Di
dyouandDaddyf
ight
?”
“
It
’sov
er!
”Il
augh
“
Mom whathappened”
“
Khuz
ani
isi
febesendodaMi
raI
’
m bet
ter
ofwi
thouthi
m”
“
Whatdi
dhedo?
”
“
Ijustwantt
osl
eepokay
”
“
I’
m sodi
sappoi
ntedi
nyoumamahow
cany
ougobackt
oal
cohol
aft
eral
l
t
hesemont
hswi
thoutt
ouchi
ngal
cohol
”
“
Kubuhl
unguMi
raekuj
uleni
kwenhl
i
ziy
o
y
ami
”Il
etoutt
het
ear
sIhav
ebeen
hol
dingal
lal
ong.
“
Ohmamawhathashedone?
”Shepul
l
s
met
oherchestandIex
plai
ntoherwhat
happened.
“
Youl
eftaf
terhesai
dify
oul
eav
eit
’s
ov
er”
“
Yeshedi
dn’
tev
enbegmet
ost
ayMi
ra.
I
t’
sli
kehecoul
dn’
twai
ttogetr
idofme.
Fi
nal
l
yhehasasont
hathehasbeen
l
ongi
ngf
or.Theol
dhagt
hatdoesn’
t
wantt
obearhi
m asonmustgoKhany
i
i
sher
enowwi
thhi
sson!
”Il
augh
“
Ithi
nky
ouov
ert
hinki
ngt
hismama.
Daddyl
ovesy
ouandwear
enotsur
e
t
hatt
hesoni
sdad’
s.Khany
aor
what
everhernamei
scoul
dbel
yi
ng
becauseshewantdaddyt
osav
eherson
f
rom Spi
der
”
“
It
’shi
ssonI
’
mtel
l
ingy
ou”
“
Evensomom y
out
wower
en’
ttoget
her
whenal
loft
hishappened.Idon’
tthi
nk
y
ouhav
ear
ightt
obemad”
“
She’
smyni
eceMi
radon’
tyougeti
t?
Thev
erysameni
ecet
hatsl
eptwi
thmy
l
atehusband.Thi
sgi
rli
sthr
owni
nmy
f
aceov
erandov
er.Ican’
tbr
eat
heI
’
m
suf
focat
ing.K’
spasti
sal
way
scat
chi
ng
upwi
thusandi
t’
sal
way
sinv
olv
esa
womant
hathef
uckedaymi
na
ngi
khat
hel
e.May
bei
fyouwer
eol
derhe
woul
dhav
esl
eptwi
thy
out
oo!Iwon’
t
t
oler
ateshi
tI’
mti
redofbei
ngt
reat
ed
l
i
kedi
rt
!”
“
Soy
ouar
egi
vi
ngupj
ustl
i
ket
hat
?”
“
It
’snotwor
thi
t”
“
CanIt
ell
yousomet
hing”Inod
“
Ifeel
li
keuncl
eKi
sbei
ngpuni
shedf
or
Khumal
o’smi
stakes.I
t’
sagoodt
hingt
o
knowy
ourwor
thbutIf
eel
li
key
ouar
e
t
aki
ngt
hist
wof
arnow.Daddyi
sri
ghtt
o
quest
iony
ourl
ovef
orhi
mit
’sdoesn’
t
t
akey
ouasecondt
oendt
hingswi
th
hi
m.Iunder
standwher
ehe’
scomi
ng
f
rom hef
eel
swor
thl
essandnot
i
mpor
tant
.Mom Ihav
eal
way
sknown
y
ouasast
rongwomanwhocant
ake
any
thi
ngpl
easedon’
tal
l
owt
hatKhany
i
womant
odest
roywhaty
ouanddaddy
hav
e.Ev
eni
fit
’shi
ssonIdon’
tthi
nkhe
wi
l
lchanget
hewayhef
eel
sabouty
ou.
Heneedsy
oubyhi
ssi
der
ightnow,
he’
s
onl
ysoncoul
dbei
ndangerandy
ou
r
unni
ngawayf
rom hi
misaddi
ngmor
e
st
ress.Thatmanl
ovesy
ousomuchhe
cant
urnt
hiswor
ldupsi
dedownf
ory
ou.
St
opal
l
owi
ngy
ourpastt
ost
andony
our
wayofhappi
ness.It
hinky
ouwer
etoo
qui
ckt
ost
opt
her
apyandAAmeet
ings
mama”Ipul
lupf
rom herchestandl
ook
ather
“
Whenhav
eyoubecomesosmar
t?”she
chuckl
es
“
Ihav
eal
way
sbeensmar
tit
’sj
ustt
hat
peopl
ethoughtI
’
m st
upi
dbecauseIwas
bl
i
nd”Thosewor
dshi
thomeIonce
cal
l
edherst
upi
dbl
i
ndgi
rlbutIdi
dn’
t
meani
tal
l
“
I’
m sor
ry…”sheshut
smeupwi
thher
f
ingeronmyl
i
ps
“
Sukal
apho.Gosl
eepandwheny
ou
wakeupf
reshenupandgot
odaddy
.”
“
OkayI
….”
“
What
’swr
ong”
“
Idon’
tfeel
sogoodI
..
.ahhh”
“
Mama!
”
“
GoLwandl
elwenkosi
iswai
ti
ng
f
or.
..
yooouu”
“
Nonomom l
et’
stakey
out
hehospi
tal
”
shecal
l
shel
pandt
heyr
ushmet
o
Lwandl
elwenkosi
’
scar
.Imusthav
e
passedoutont
hewaybecauseI
’
m
wokenupbyv
oices.Iopenmyey
esand
seemydaught
erandt
hedoct
or
“
Mom y
ouar
eawake”
“
MrsKhumal
ohowar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
”
“
I’
mfi
ne”
“
Youdoknowt
hatdr
inki
ngal
cohol
in
y
ourcondi
ti
oni
snotr
ight
?”
“
Inmycondi
ti
on?
”
“
Yesy
ouar
e18weekspr
egnant
”

Thedoct
orar
ri
vesandchecksKhany
i
whoal
readyhaspassedout
.
“
Sheneedt
ogot
othehospi
tal
Khuz
ani
shel
ostt
oomuchofbl
ood”
“
Att
hehospi
tal
theywi
l
laskquest
ions
t
hatIhav
enoanswer
sforcan’
tyoudo
somet
hingher
e”
“
Idi
dev
ery
thi
ngt
hatIcanbutIst
il
l
suggestt
hatshegot
othehospi
tal
”
“
Shewi
l
lbeokayshehast
obeokay
.
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ngpl
easekeepy
our
phoneonsot
hatIcanbeabl
etor
each
y
oui
fsomet
hinghappens”
“
Okaydon’
tment
ioni
t”Het
akeshi
s
t
hingsandIwal
khi
m outt
hengocheck
onmydaught
erwhohasbeeni
nher
bedr
oom si
nceBongaandKamar
ial
eft
.
“
Babygi
rl
”Iwal
kcl
osert
oherbedand
l
ookather
.
“
Youhav
ebeencr
yingwhat
’swr
ong”
“
Not
hing”
“
Comeonsweet
hear
ttal
ktodaddy
”
“
It
’snotl
i
kei
twi
l
lmakeanydi
ff
erence
mos.Mommypackedal
lhercl
othesand
l
eft
,she’
snotcomi
ngback!
”
“
Heydon’
trai
sey
ourv
oiceatme!
”
“
I’
m sor
rydaddybutdon’
tIdeser
vet
o
hav
eamommy
?”
“
Youdobaby
”
“
Thenwhydi
dyouchaseherout
?”
“
Emi
hley
ouar
est
il
lyoungy
ouwon’
t
under
stand”
“
YouseeIt
oldy
out
hati
twon’
tmake
anydi
ff
erence.Iwantt
osl
eepnow”she
cov
ersher
sel
fwi
thaduv
et.Isi
gh
heav
il
y.HowdoIex
plai
ntoheri
naway
t
hatshecanunder
stand.It
hought
i
ntr
oduci
ngBongat
oherwasagood
t
hingbecauseIt
houghtshe’
smyf
orev
er.
“
Don’
tyouwantt
oeat
?”
“
NoI
’
m nothungr
y”
“
Daddyl
ovesy
ou”shedoesn’
trepl
y
“
Emi
hleIl
ovey
ou”
“
Okaydaddy
”Igetupandwal
kout
f
eel
i
ngdef
eat
ed.Isi
tdownonmyst
udy
r
oom andcal
lSl
ova.
“
ManIneedy
ourhel
p”
“
Hel
l
oKhuz
ani
”Ichuckl
e
“
Arey
ougood”
“
Yes.
..
what
’sgoi
ngon”Iex
plai
ntohi
m
“
Howsur
ear
eyoui
t’
syourson”
“
I’
m notsur
endodaIdon’
tknowwhatt
o
do.Whati
fKhany
iwantt
ousemeor
whati
fhe’
sreal
l
ymyson”
“
It
’sat
oughdeci
sionmymanbuty
ou
hav
enot
hingt
olosei
fyouhel
pher
”
“
Icoul
dlosemyl
i
fet
hat
’sSpi
derwear
e
t
alki
ngabout
!Tel
lmewhatt
odoSl
ova.
I
’
m soconf
used.Ev
ery
thi
ngi
sspi
ral
i
ng
outofcont
rol
Bongal
eftmeandEmi
hle
i
sangr
yatmet
hatIchasedouther
mommy
.Thent
her
e’sSci
ssorwhowant
met
owor
kforhi
m”
“
TjoKhuz
ani
ngangi
khuz
akodwango
Sci
ssor
”
“
Idon’
tregr
eti
tthough”
“
Kusi
zani
shel
efty
ou!Yousol
dyour
sel
f
t
othedev
ilf
orsomeonewhodoesn’
t
v
aluenorl
ovey
ou!
”
“
Ical
l
edy
oubecauseIwantsol
uti
ons
manst
opwhi
ningandt
ell
mewhatt
o
do”
“
I’
m comi
ngwewi
l
ldeal
wit
hev
ery
thi
ng
whenI
’
mther
e.”
“
Youdor
eal
i
zebyt
het
imey
ougether
e
i
tcoul
dbel
atef
ormyson”
“
Haaaal
readyy
ouar
ecal
l
inghi
myour
son”
“
Fuckof
fmaan.Iwi
l
lsendaj
ett
oget
y
ounow”Ihangupandt
her
e’si
ncomi
ng
cal
lfr
om Mi
ra
“
Maf
ungwase”
“
It
’smeK”
“
Ufunani
?”
“
I’
m sor
ryK…”Icuthershor
t
“
Lal
elaIdon’
thav
eti
mef
ory
oursor
ri
es
y
oumadey
ourchoi
ceBonganowl
i
ve
wi
thi
t!
”
“
Babypl
easeI
…”
“
Ineedt
ofi
ndmysonbef
oret
hat
bast
ardki
l
lshi
m sopl
ease
awungi
shay
isengomoy
asi
si”Ihangup
andgot
ocheckonKhany
i.Ishakeher
butshe’
snotwaki
ngup.Icheckher
pul
sei
t’
snott
her
e.
“
Khany
isi
l
e!!
!”Ical
lthedoct
orpaci
ngup
anddown.
“
Khany
idon’
tdot
hiswakeup!
!”Af
ter
whatf
eel
sli
kef
orev
ert
hedoct
orar
ri
ves.
“
Shehasnopul
seMshengu!
”Hechecks
herandshakeshi
shead
“
I’
m sor
ryKhuz
ani
she’
sgone”
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdaySi
l
indi
l
eZondo
Gumede&Noz
iphoNi
nel
aandHappy
Bi
rt
hdayPont
shoNomsa

CHAPTER81
(
Unedi
ted)

Idon’
tknowhowdoIf
eel
aboutmom
bei
ngpr
egnant
.Ihav
emi
xedemot
ions
act
ual
l
yapar
tofmei
shappyandot
her
par
tofmei
sabi
tsadIdon’
tknowwhy
.
“
Youar
eawf
ull
yqui
etIt
houghty
ousai
d
y
ourmom i
sfi
ne”Hel
ooksatmeont
he
r
earmi
rr
orasI
’
m att
hebackseatwi
th
Kamar
ia.Thel
i
ttl
epr
incessdoesn’
t
wantt
osi
tal
oneatt
heback.
“
I’
mjustt
ir
ed”
“
Iwi
l
lgi
vey
ouamassagewhenweget
homeokay
”Ismi
l
efai
ntl
y.Kamar
iai
s
t
hef
ir
stt
ojumpoutoft
hecarandr
unt
o
Snowhopi
cksherupandt
ickl
esher
.
“
Comemydol
l
face”Hehel
psmeoutof
t
hecarandcl
osest
hedoor
.
“
Herbr
oandsi
s”Snosay
sopeni
ngher
ar
msaf
terput
ti
ngKamar
iadown
“
Heybabygi
rl
”Iacceptherembr
aceand
passeshert
oherbr
other
.
“
Howar
eyoumunchki
n?”
“
I’
mfi
nebut
i.How’
smynephewMi
ra”
shesay
sbr
ushi
ngmyt
ummy
“
He’
sokayhemi
ssedy
ou”
“
Hemustki
ckkei
fhemi
ssedme.
”I
gi
ggl
e
“
He’
ssl
eepi
ngnow”
“
Youwi
l
ltel
lmewhenheki
cksr
ight
?”
“
YesIwi
l
l”
“
Snohow’
smychi
ckens?
”
“
Let
’sgoandcheckont
hem”Theyr
un
waywhi
l
eLwenkosi
andIwal
kinsi
de
t
hehouse.Hi
spar
ent
sar
eint
hel
ounge
wat
chi
ngt
v.Mom Zor
emov
esherl
egs
onherhusband’
slapsandj
umpsupt
o
hugme.
“
Baby
!”
“
Mom pl
easedon’
thur
thery
ouar
e
squeez
inghert
oot
ight
ly”
“
Hai
sukakahl
ewenaI
’
mjusthappyt
o
seemydaught
erandmygr
andson.How
ar
eyousi
s”shesay
slet
ti
ngl
osef
rom
t
hehug.
“
I’
mfi
nemamaunj
ani
wena”
“
I’
m okaysi
sIhav
emi
ssedy
ousomuch.
Ev
ersi
ncey
ouandLwandl
egot
engagedy
ounev
erv
isi
tusbabywhydi
d
Iupsety
ouorsomet
hing”
“
NomamaIhav
ebeenv
erybusyI
’
m
sor
ry”I
t’
sthet
rut
hshame.
“
Okayuy
akhul
aunana”shebr
ushesmy
t
ummy
“
Yeah”shehel
psmesi
tdown.
“
SawbonaBaba”(
Greet
ingsDad)
“
Yebokot
ini
njani
”
“
Wear
efi
net
hanky
ouandy
ousi
r”He
chuckl
es
“
I’
mfi
ne”Mom Zoset
tl
esnex
ttome
“
Ain’
tyouhungr
y”
“
NomamaI
’
mfi
ne”Iev
enhadsecondat
t
hef
uner
al.
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
gopourwar
m wat
er
i
nthebasi
nandbr
ingi
ther
e”
“
Haaamamangi
fi
kanj
e
seway
ingi
thuma”
“
Stopcompl
aini
ngmaan!
”Lwenkosi
mumbl
esl
i
keat
oddl
erashewal
ksout
causi
ngust
olaugh.
“
Howf
arar
eyounowkot
i”BabBheki
asks
“5mont
hs”
“
Shuuuy
oul
ookl
i
key
ouaboutt
opop
t
hatchi
l
doutal
ready
”Ohi
sthathi
sway
ofsay
ingI
’
m huge.Ibl
i
nkbackmyt
ear
s,
mom Zopi
ncheshi
m
“
Ouch”
Lwenkosi
comesbackwi
thabasi
nand
puti
tdownt
henmom Zowashesmy
swol
l
enachi
ngf
eetaf
terpour
ing
somet
hingont
hewat
erofwhi
chIhav
e
noknowl
edgeofwhati
sitbutI
’
m must
sayi
tdoi
ngwonder
sonmyf
eet
“
Youhav
enev
erwashedmyf
eetmom”
Lwenkosi
compl
ains.Jeal
ousy
!
“
Getpr
egnantf
ir
stt
henIwi
l
l”weshr
iek
wi
thl
aught
er.
“
Thenex
tbabywi
l
lwebecar
ri
edbyme”
Theyl
aughandIl
ookatLwenkosi
.What
nex
tbabyi
shet
alki
ngabout
?Im done
wi
tht
hisbaby
!
BabBheki
andLwenkosi
takeadr
ive
andl
eav
emewi
thmom Zowho’
snow
massagi
ngmyf
eetsof
reaki
nggood.
“
Mom Zo”
“
Yesbaby
”
“
Guguwantt
ocomeher
eandapol
ogi
ze
butshe’
sscar
ed”wel
lshedi
dsayshe
wantt
ocomeandapol
ogi
ze.
“
Ayt
hatgi
rlpl
ayedwi
thusmaan!
”
“
Yesbi
gti
me”
“
Buti
fherapol
ogyi
ssi
ncer
ethenwho
ar
ewet
ojudge.Ev
ery
onedeser
vesa
secondchancemybaby
”Okayatl
east
mom Zoagr
eeswi
thmenoIhav
eto
wor
konmyf
iancé.Hedoesn’
thav
eto
f
orgi
vehernowbutatl
eastal
l
owmet
o
gi
veherapl
acet
ost
ay,
shecanr
entan
apar
tmenther
e.Guguhasbeent
hrough
al
otI
’
m af
rai
difshegoesbackt
othat
housewher
etheyt
reatherl
i
keasl
ave
shewi
l
lgi
veuponherl
i
fe.

Thedoct
orsai
dhe’
sgoi
ngt
okeepme
her
efort
heni
ght
.Idon’
tknowhowIf
eel
aboutt
hispr
egnancyandhonest
lyI
hav
etoadmi
tthatImi
ssedal
lthesi
gns,
wer
etheyev
ent
her
etobegi
nwi
th?I
don’
tknowr
eal
l
ybutIhav
ebeengai
ning
wei
ghtandIt
houghti
t’
sbecausel
i
fei
s
agr
eei
ngwi
thmeandKi
str
eat
ingme
wel
l
.Speaki
ngoft
hatonesi
gh!It
ri
edt
o
cal
lhi
m wi
thMi
ra’
sphonesi
ncet
hey
di
dn’
tbr
ingmi
neandhet
oldmet
ogi
ve
hi
m aspacet
obr
eat
hheneedt
ofi
nd
hi
s“son”andt
hatwhatI
’
m goi
ngt
odo.
Iov
err
eact
edIadmi
tbuthedi
dn’
thav
e
t
odi
smi
ssmel
i
ket
hat
.Ki
sal
way
s
shut
ti
ngmeoutwhenIwantt
oex
plai
n
my
sel
ftohi
mit
’sex
haust
ingr
eal
l
y.The
doorswi
ngsopenandZowal
ksi
nwi
tha
spor
tbagandf
oodpaperbag.
“
Heysi
s”
“
HeyZo”shepl
acest
hepaperbagon
t
hebedsi
det
abl
eandsqueez
esmei
n
herar
ms
“
Theki
dst
oldmey
ouar
eher
eIcameas
f
astasIcoul
d.Ibr
oughty
out
oil
etr
ies,
pj
s,sl
i
pper
sandf
ood”
“
Thanky
ou”
“
GoshBongaal
cohol
real
l
y”
“
Don’
tjudgemepl
ease”shegr
abst
he
chai
randsi
tsdown
“
I’
m notbutwhywhathappened?Why
woul
dyougi
veupnowaf
teral
lthese
mont
hs”
“
Yourbr
otheri
sdr
ovemeov
ert
heedge
Zo”
“
Tal
ktome”Iex
plai
ntoherwhat
happened
“
Ohpl
easedon’
ttel
lmey
oubel
i
evet
hat
bi
tch!
”
“
It
’shi
ssonI
’
mtel
l
ingy
ouZot
heway
sheex
plai
nedev
ery
thi
ngIcoul
dseet
hat
shewast
ell
i
ngt
het
rut
h.”Shesi
ghs
“
Thi
sist
oomucht
otakei
n”
“
I’
m gl
ady
ouf
eel
me”
“
ButIal
sounder
standwher
ehe’
s
comi
ngf
rom Bongay
ouar
eal
way
s
r
eadyt
oleav
ehi
m whenev
ery
ouguy
s
ar
efi
ght
ing”
“
Whyar
eyouguy
ssay
ingI
’
m al
way
s
r
eadyt
oleav
eIdi
ditonceZoonceandI
don’
tregr
eti
t!Iwasn’
tgoi
ngt
ost
aywi
th
someonewhodoesn’
ttr
ustmebutI
l
ovehi
m andIf
orgav
ehi
m.Thel
easthe
coul
ddoi
stounder
standt
hatt
hisi
s
al
sot
oomuchf
orme.Ican’
tjustsmi
l
e
t
hathehasasonwi
thmyni
ecet
he
sameni
ecet
hatsl
eptwi
thmyl
ate
husband!
”
“
Pleasecal
m down”It
akeahuge
br
eat
he
“
Iunder
standsi
sIr
eal
l
ydobuthegav
e
y
ouachancet
ochooseandy
ouchose
t
oleav
e”
“
Whydi
dheev
endot
hatf
rom t
hef
ir
st
pl
acev
elehewant
edmet
oleav
e”
“
Maki
nghugedeci
sionswhi
l
eyouar
e
angr
yandhur
tisnotagoodi
dea.Thi
s
caughtbot
hofy
ouof
fguar
dyouneeded
t
imeal
onet
obr
eat
heandt
hinkt
hings
t
hrough.Iknowt
hathewasn’
treadyf
or
t
hedeci
siony
out
ookandy
ouwer
eal
so
notr
eadyf
ort
heoney
out
ook.
”
“
Youar
eri
ghtIdon’
twantt
oleav
ehi
m
ZoIl
ovehi
m butIwon’
tli
eI’
m sonot
happyathowhi
spastcat
chesupwi
th
usandi
t’
sal
way
sinv
olv
esawomenshe
f
ucked”
“
Aichanami
makwi
yi
ley
oingi
cikat
u.
Deal
i
ngwi
thdi
ff
erentwomenev
erynow
andt
heni
sabi
ttoomuch.Youcan’
t
ev
enbr
agwi
thamanl
i
ket
hatwheny
ou
ar
ewi
thot
herwomen”
“
Tel
lmeabouti
t.Ther
e’sal
way
sgonna
beahoet
hatknowhow’
syourmani
sin
bed”
“
Bei
ngawomani
sahar
djobshame.I
hat
ewheny
ouguy
sar
efi
ght
ingt
hough
becausei
t’
saf
fect
ingEmi
hleaswel
l
.
Thatl
i
ttl
egi
rll
ovesy
ouBonga”
“
Ilov
ehert
ooZoshe’
ssuchanangel
andIwon’
tal
l
owmyr
elat
ionshi
pwi
thK
af
fectourbond.Nomat
terwhatcan
happenbet
weenKandIshewi
l
lal
way
s
bemydaught
er”
“
Don’
ttel
lmey
ouar
egi
vi
ngupwhat
doest
hatsupposedt
omeannow?
”
“
Itr
iedt
ohumbl
emy
sel
fandapol
ogi
ze
ont
hephonehet
oldmegi
vehi
ma
spacet
obr
eat
heandy
ouknowy
our
br
otherhewi
l
lnev
ergi
vemeachance
t
oex
plai
nandapol
ogi
zeso
ngi
zomshay
isangomoy
a”
“
Somet
imesukushay
isaumunt
uumoy
a
i
snotagoodi
dea”
“
Byt
hewayy
ouar
egoi
ngt
obeanaunt
”
shepopsherey
esoutandbeams
“
Youar
epr
egnant
!”Inod
“
OhmyI
’
m sohappycongr
atul
ati
ons!
”
Sheat
tempt
stohugmebutIpushher
“
Woahhol
ditr
ightt
her
ewomanwhat
di
dyoudot
omyshot
s?”Shel
aughs
“
Not
hingBonga”
“
Thenhowi
spossi
blet
hatI
’
m
pr
egnant
?”
“
Youknowt
her
e’snohundr
edper
cent
guar
ant
eei
nthesecont
racept
ives”
“
UnamangaZo”
Shegi
ggl
es
“
Dontt
ell
mey
ouser
iousl
ythi
nkIcan
t
ri
cky
ou”
“
Ahphel
awewi
l
lnev
erknowandy
ou
knowhowbadl
yyourbr
otherwant
sa
son”
“
Idi
dn’
tsi
str
ustmehowf
ary
ou?
”
“
18weeks”
“
Ohr
emembert
haty
ouwer
eon
ant
ibi
oti
csdur
ingt
hatt
imef
ort
hat
i
nfect
ion.Somear
ever
yst
rongdi
dn’
t
t
hedoct
ort
ell
you?
”
“
Noy
ouseewhyIr
athert
rav
el500and
somet
hingki
l
omet
erst
oyout
hengot
o
ot
herdoct
orsi
nJohannesbur
g”
“
Yesbutmi
naI
’
m sohappyI
’
m goi
ngt
o
beanaunt
!Ican’
twai
ttodoshoppi
ng
f
or…”herphonedi
stur
bshersoshe’
s
answer
sit
“
But
i.
..
ohnowhen.
..
I’
m comi
ng…”She
hangsup.
“
What
?”
“
Khany
iisdead”
“
Ohmy
!”
“
Ihav
etogo”
“
Okaypl
easedon’
ttel
lhi
m aboutt
he
pr
egnancyIwi
l
ltel
lhi
m my
sel
f”
“
Okaysi
s”sheki
ssesmyf
oreheadand
dashesout
.Ther
ewasnowayshecoul
d
sur
viv
edaf
tert
hatbl
oodshel
ost
.It
’s
t
henex
tmor
ningandt
hef
ir
stt
hingIdo
af
terbei
ngdi
schar
gedi
stor
equestan
Ubert
oK’
shouse.
“
Mommy
!”Emi
hlehugsmeaf
ter
openi
ngt
hedoorf
orme
“
Hel
l
osweet
hear
thowar
eyou”
“
I’
m sohappyy
ouar
ebackIt
houghty
ou
l
eftme.Wher
ear
eyourbagsand
wher
e’sKam Kam”Herf
atherappear
s
behi
ndher
“
Emi
hlegot
oyourr
oom”
“
DaddyI
…”
“
NowEmi
hle!
”Emi
hlehuf
fsandwal
ks
away
“
Didy
ouhav
etoshoutather
?”
“
I’
m sur
eyouar
enother
etot
ell
mehow
t
otal
ktoMYdaught
er”Ichuckl
e
“
Youwon’
tletmei
n?”
“
Whatdoy
ouwantIt
houghty
oupacked
al
lyourbel
ongi
ngs”
“
KI’
m sor
ryIov
err
eact
edIl
ovey
ou…”
He
cut
smeshor
t
“
Bongapl
easeI
’
m busyy
az.
”
“
Ihear
dKhany
iisdead”
“
Yes.
..
shei
sbuti
t’
snotl
i
key
oucar
e”
“
Shewasmyni
ecehowcany
ousay
t
hat
”
“
What
everby
e”Heshut
sthedooronmy
f
ace,
whyam Isur
pri
sedhej
ustdi
dthat
.
Ineedt
oletmypar
ent
sknowabout
Khany
i’
sdeat
hI’
m sur
etheywoul
dwant
t
hei
rgr
anddaught
ert
obebur
iednex
tto
t
hei
rdaught
er.IwonderwhyKhany
i
di
dn’
tst
aywi
thmypar
ent
sinst
eadof
t
hatasshol
ecal
l
edMf
ani
seni
.Khany
i
andIwer
en’
tbestf
ri
endbutI
’
dbel
yi
ng
i
fIsayherdeat
hisnotaf
fect
ingme.
-

Iswi
vel
aroundandf
indmydaught
er
st
ari
ngatmewi
tht
ear
srunni
ngdown
herf
ace.
“
Isai
dgot
oyourbedr
oom Emi
hlewhy
ar
eyouher
e?”
“
Whyy
oudon’
twantmet
obehappy
daddy
?”
“
Emi
hleI
’
m goi
ngt
hroughal
otr
ightnow
Idon’
tneedy
ourdr
ama!
”
“
Ihat
eyou!
”sher
unsaway
.Isi
ght
his
l
i
ttl
egi
rli
sdr
ivi
ngmecr
azywi
thher
t
ant
rumsy
err
!Ther
e’sal
otgoi
ngon
r
ightnowbutI
’
m gl
adt
hatSl
ovai
sher
e.
Wedi
dn’
tsl
eepl
astni
ghtt
ryi
ngt
otr
ack
downev
erySpi
der
’smov
eandwef
ound
outt
hathe’
skeepi
ngt
heboyi
nthe
samehouset
heyuset
ousewi
thVusi
to
dot
hei
rki
l
li
ngs.Ihav
eor
gani
zedsome
guy
swear
egoi
ngt
oat
tackandgett
he
boyl
et’
shopei
twon’
tbet
ool
ateby
t
hen.Idon’
tcar
eift
heboyi
smi
neor
notIwi
l
lsav
ehi
m.He’
sani
nnocentboy
whodoesn’
tdeser
vet
osuf
ferf
orhi
s
par
ent
ssi
ns.It
akemyphoneandcal
l
Zo
“
But
i”
“
Heyhowar
eyou?
”
“
Ishoul
dbeaski
ngy
out
hat
”
“
I’
m st
ressedoutbutIwi
l
lbef
ine.Ineed
af
avor
”
“
Any
thi
ngf
ory
ou”
“
Cany
oupl
easecomeandf
etchEmi
hle
f
ormeI
’
m sur
ehav
ingKam Kam and
Snowi
l
lcheerherup”
“
OkayI
’
m comi
ng”Igot
oEmi
hle’
s
bedr
oom
“
Packy
ourcl
othesaunt
yZoi
scomi
ng
t
ofet
chy
ou”
“
Iwantmommy
”
“
Emi
hleMsi
mangouz
ongi
dinangal
o
mommymommywokunuka!
”Sl
ova
l
ooksatme
“
What
?”
“
Comeher
e”wegot
omyst
udyr
oom
“
Youar
ebei
ngt
oohar
shont
heki
dnow.
Youar
etheonei
ntr
oducedhert
oBonga
andnowshe’
sgone.
..
”
“
It
’snotmyf
aul
tshewant
edt
oleav
e!”
“
Truebuty
ouhav
etounder
standt
hat
t
heki
dlov
esher
,shef
oundmot
her
ly
l
ovekuBongasomet
hingshehasbeen
y
ear
ningf
or.Youshoul
dbecomf
ort
ing
hernotshout
inghert
hisi
sal
sohar
d
nakuy
e”
“
It
’shasal
way
sbeenmeandhershe
mustgetuset
othatagai
n!”
“
Youar
ebr
eat
hingf
ir
eyer
r”
“
Ever
ythi
ngi
sfuckedupman!
”
“
Wasn’
tBongaher
etoapol
ogi
ze”
“
ShewasbutI
’
m donewi
thhershe’
snot
st
rongenought
obemywoman.
”
“
Howar
eyougoi
ngt
odeal
wit
h
Sci
ssor
?”
“
Canwef
indt
heboyangbur
yKhany
i
f
ir
stt
henwewi
l
ldeal
wit
hSci
ssor
”
“
We?
”
“
Yesy
ouandme”
“
HayKhuz
ani
countmeoutangi
zi
ngeni
”
“
ComeonSl
ovamf
ethuy
ouandIgot
eachot
her
’sback”
“
YesbutnoI
’
m sor
rymany
ouar
eon
y
ourown”

“
Thanksf
ort
aki
ngher
”Isayt
oZoasI
opent
hedoorf
orher
“
Don’
tment
ioni
t.
”Emi
hleappear
swi
th
herbackpack.
“
Hel
l
oAunt
yZo”
“
Heysi
s”Theyhug
“
Daddyl
ovesy
ou”shedoesn’
trepl
ybut
wal
ksout
.
“
Shewi
l
lcomear
oundbuty
ouand
Bongahav
etof
ixt
hings”
“
I’
m donewi
thBongaZo”
“
Youdon’
tmeant
hat
.”
“
Ido.Goodby
e”Ipushherout
.
Theguy
sar
ri
ved30mi
nuet
slat
erwe
di
scussourpl
ant
henwear
egoodt
ogo.
Ther
ear
e15ofusIhadt
ogetasmany
guy
sasIcanSpi
deri
stoodanger
ous.
Sl
ovashoot
sthesecur
it
yguar
datt
he
gat
eandwemakeourwayi
nandspl
i
t.I
heargunshot
s.Spi
der
’sguy
sandmi
ne
ar
efi
ri
nggunshot
s.If
indmywayi
nsi
de
t
hehouseandheadt
other
oom wher
e
t
heboyi
skept
.Iopent
hedoorand
t
her
ehei
sfi
dget
ingont
hef
loorand
cr
ying.
“
Heyboy
”Hel
ooksupatmewi
thf
ear
“
Iwon’
thur
tyouokay
”Icr
ouchbef
ore
hi
m andIf
eel
tear
str
igger
ingi
nmyey
es
asIl
ookathi
m.
Hel
ooksmor
eli
kemyf
athert
henme.
Ther
ear
efi
ngerpr
int
sonhi
sfaceand
myhear
tdr
opst
othepi
tofmyst
omach.
If
eel
presencebehi
ndmeandgetup
“
Iunder
est
imat
edy
ouMsi
mango”He’
s
poi
nti
ngatmegun
“
Ishoul
dhav
eki
l
ledy
out
hedayIf
ound
outy
ouwer
ebehi
ndMi
ra’
s
di
sappear
anceSpi
der
!”Hel
aughsl
oudl
y.
“
Youki
l
lme?Youhav
ejokes”
“
Let
’sf
ightnowmant
oman.No
weapons”
“
Okay
”webot
hputdownourguns
“
Wewon’
tfi
ghther
einf
rontofmyson.
”
Ihearagunshot
gunanddr
opsofbl
ood
spl
att
ersonmyf
ace.Spi
derst
umbl
es
andf
all
downont
hef
loor
.
“
Whatt
hef
uckSl
ova!Iwashandl
i
ng
t
hat
!”
“
Taket
heboyandl
et’
sgo!
”
“
Howcany
oushoothi
minf
rontofmy
son!
”
“
Sor
rymanbuthe’
sdeadf
inal
l
ythe
mi
ght
ySpi
deri
sdead!
”Iwant
edt
oki
l
l
hi
m my
sel
fwi
thmybar
ehandsdammi
t!

……………….
.Thr
eeWeeksLat
er………….
..
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayThandol
wet
hu
Bhel
ekaz
iBot
toman

CHAPTER82
(
Unedi
ted)

Ir
usht
othebat
hroom andt
hrowupI
hav
ebeenf
eel
i
ngl
i
keshi
tforweeks.I
can’
tst
omachany
thi
ngbutI
’
m al
way
s
nauseousandt
hrowi
ngup.Theonl
y
t
hingIcanst
omachi
smymom’
ssour
por
ri
dgeandpi
zza.If
eel
tinyhands
br
ushi
ngmyback.
“
Arey
ouokaydaddy
”Il
ookathi
m he
hasawor
ri
edl
ookpl
ast
eredonhi
s
handsomel
i
ttl
eface.He’
ssl
owl
ybut
sur
elyget
ti
nguset
omeandot
herday
s
hemi
sseshi
smom butmymom and
t
heel
der
stol
dhi
mthathi
smom i
sin
heav
ennowandshe’
swat
chi
ngov
er
hi
m somehowt
hatmakeshi
mfeel
bet
ter
.Imeant
heMt
himkhul
u’
swhenI
sayt
heel
der
s.Iknewt
hef
ir
stt
imeIsaw
hi
mthathe’
smysonbutIwant
edpr
oof
soIdi
dDNAt
estandi
tcameback
posi
ti
ve.I
’
m soangr
yatKhany
ithatshe
keptmyboyf
rom mef
oral
lthesey
ear
s
andIf
eel
hor
ri
bleIkeptheri
n“pr
ison”
whi
l
eshewascar
ryi
ngmyson.I
fshe
t
oldmet
het
rut
hIwasgoi
ngt
otake
car
eoft
hem.Thedamagei
sal
ready
donet
her
e’snot
hingIcandoex
cept
doi
ngmybestt
obet
hebestf
atherIcan
bef
ormyson.Il
ovehi
m somuchhe’
s
suchadi
sci
pli
nedhandsomey
oung
man.Khany
irai
sedhi
m wel
landIwi
l
l
f
orev
erbegr
atef
ult
oherf
ort
his
pr
eci
ousgi
ftdespi
teany
thi
ngt
hat
happened.Shewasl
aidt
oresti
n
Dumbenex
ttohermom andIt
hinkt
hat
whatshewoul
dhav
ewant
ed.
“
Yesbuddy
”
“
Dri
nkwat
er,mommyuset
ogi
veme
wat
erwhenIt
hrowup”Igetupf
rom t
he
f
loorandr
insemymout
hthenf
lusht
he
t
oil
et.
“
Thanky
ounowIf
eel
bet
ter
”
“
Arey
ousur
e?”Ichuckl
eandpi
ckhi
m
up
“
Yesbuddywher
eisy
oursi
ster
?”
“
Shel
eft
”
“
Whatdoy
oumeanshel
eft
”
“
Idon’
tknowdaddyshet
ookhercl
othes
andl
eft
”Emi
hlehasbeenshowi
ngme
f
lameswi
thherat
ti
tudeev
ersi
nce
BongaandIbr
okeup.It
ri
edt
oex
plai
n
t
oherbutshedoesn’
twantt
oheari
t.I
don’
tknowwhatIshoul
ddonow.
“
Andgowher
e?”Heshr
ugshi
s
shoul
der
s.Iheadt
oherbedr
oom and
f
indanot
eont
hebed.‘
I
’m sor
rydaddy
butIwentt
omommyi
nJohannesbur
g’
Whatt
hef
uck!Ir
usht
omybedr
oom
andt
akemyphonet
ocal
lherbuther
phoneaendsmest
rai
ghtt
ovoi
cemai
l
.
Thi
schi
l
disgoi
ngt
obet
hedeat
hofme.
If
reshenupqui
ckl
yandchange
Thando’
spj
sthendr
ivet
oZo.
“
Hel
l
obr
other
..
.boyboyhey
”Shet
ickl
es
Thando’
scheeks
“
Ineedy
out
olookaf
terhi
m pl
ease”
“
What
’swr
ongy
oul
ookedst
ressedout
”
“
Isn’
tthatni
eceofy
our
sshewentt
o
Johannesbur
gtoBongacany
oubel
i
eve
her
!”
“
Alone?
”
“
Yeswhatdoessheknowabout
t
rav
eli
ngal
onel
etal
onet
o
Johannesbur
g!”
“
OhnoZani
!Gopl
easekeepme
updat
ed”
“
Thandogot
oyouraunt
”
“
Iwantt
ogowi
thy
oudaddy
”
“
NoboyIwi
l
lcomebacknow”Hebur
st
i
ntot
ear
sandmyhear
tsi
nksbutt
her
e’s
not
hingIcando.I
’
m goi
ngt
oki
l
lthatki
d
whenIf
indher
!

-
“
Hesai
dhewantt
obeser
vedbyy
ou”
Kat
esay
swi
thsomuchannoy
ancei
n
herv
oice.
“
Who?
”Iaskandsher
oll
sherey
es
poi
nti
ngatMrBi
gTi
pbyt
hecor
ner
.He
washer
eyest
erdayandIser
vedhi
m,he
gav
emeR1000t
ip.Ev
ersi
nceIst
art
ed
wor
kingi
nthi
srest
aur
antaweekagoI
hav
en’
trecei
vedt
ipsunt
ily
est
erday
.
Thi
sguymademydayy
est
erdaypl
usI
needal
lthemoneyt
hatIcanget
.I’
m
sav
ingt
obuyagi
ftf
orMi
raherweddi
ng
i
sont
hisweekend.Icannev
ert
hankher
enoughf
orev
ery
thi
ngshehaddonet
o
me,
asi
fherf
orgi
venesswasn’
tenough
she’
srent
inganapar
tmentf
orme,
she
gav
ememoneyf
orgr
ocer
ies,
toi
l
etr
ies
andcl
othessheev
enboughtmea
phone.If
eel
li
keI
’
mtaki
ngan
adv
ant
ageofherki
ndnesshonest
lyI
don’
tdeser
veal
loft
his.I
’
m gl
adt
hough
t
hatherf
ami
l
yandt
heNkosi
fami
l
y
accept
edmyapol
ogyi
ncl
udi
ngLwandl
e.
It
akemynot
epadandwal
ktot
his
gor
geousguybyt
hecor
ner
.
“
Gooddaysi
r”Hepul
l
suphi
sheadand
l
ooksatmei
ntensel
y
“
Pleasecal
lmeVuki
l
e”Hi
shuskyv
oice
i
ssendi
ngchi
l
lsdownmyspi
ne
“
Howar
eyouGugul
ethu”
“
I’
mfi
nesi
r.
..
ImeanVuki
l
ehowar
eyou”
“
I’
m al
sogood.
..
canIhav
etheusual
pl
ease”Il
ookathi
m
“
Theusual
?”
“
Yest
hesamemeal
Iat
eyest
erday
”
“
Ohokay
”Iwr
it
edownev
ery
thi
ng
“
Woul
dyoul
i
ket
oaddany
thi
ng?
”
“
Nomyl
ady
”
“
Yourmeal
iscomi
ngr
ightup”Iswi
vel
ar
oundandr
eleaseahugebr
eat
hI
di
dn’
tknowIhav
ebeenhol
dingt
henmy
makemywayt
ocount
er.
“
Whatdoeshewantf
rom y
ou?
”Kat
e
asks
“
Toser
vehi
m”
“
Whyy
ou?Youar
est
il
lnewher
e!”
“
Idon’
tknowKat
e”
“
Youseducedhi
m!”Okayshedoesn’
t
l
i
kemeandt
hat
’sf
inebutnowshe’
s
st
art
ingt
oannoyme.
“
Awuy
ekeuguguwenaml
ungu!
”Ket
ty
say
s.
“
Whatdi
dyousaybi
tch?
”
“
Yeywhodi
dyoucal
lbi
tchIwi
l
lwi
pe
t
hisf
loorwi
thy
ourf
latass!
”Ket
tyi
s
r
atchetandal
lbutshe’
ssoni
ceand
wel
comi
ngt
hent
heot
herl
adi
es.Ispend
mostofmyl
uncheswi
thher
.
“
Ket
typl
easecal
m down”It
ryt
ocal
m
herdown
“
She’
stheonet
hatcal
l
edmebi
tch!
Yewenasf
ebesoml
ungu!
”Icanseet
hat
Kat
eisscar
edbutshe’
str
yingt
oactl
i
ke
she’
snotscar
ed.
“
Fucky
ou!
”
“
Guy
scomeont
hisnott
hepl
acenort
he
t
ime!Cany
oupl
easebehav
eli
kel
adi
es”
“
Her
e’sMrhandsomecomi
ng”shi
thi
s
or
der
!
“
Gugu”
“
I’
m sor
rysi
ryour
….”
“
Don’
twor
ryabouti
tIj
ustr
ecei
veda
cal
lIhav
etor
ushsomewher
e.Her
e’s
t
hemoneyf
ort
hebi
l
lkeept
hechange”
Hegi
vesmef
ewt
wohundr
ednot
esand
wal
ksawayt
henst
opsonhi
str
ack.
“
Gugu?
”
“
Yessi
r”
“
Arey
oubusyont
heweekend?
”
“
I’
m goi
ngt
oDur
banmybestf
ri
endi
s
get
ti
ngmar
ri
ed”
“
Per
fectwewi
l
lgot
oget
herIcant
r
ememberwhenwast
hel
astIat
tended
aweddi
ng.
”Wi
tht
hatsai
dhewal
ksout
l
eav
ingmeast
ounded.
“
Wowl
et’
ssee”Ket
tyt
akest
het
wo
hundr
ednot
esi
nmyhandandcount
s
t
hem.
“
R1000.
..
yourchangei
sR640,
34t
his
dudei
sloadedmos”Kat
ecl
i
cksher
t
ongueandwal
ksawayt
oser
ve
cust
omer
s.
“
Thi
sbl
oodywhi
tebi
tchwant
syourman
don’
tal
l
owhert
otakehi
m!”Il
augh
“
Mymanhe’
snotmyman”
“
Hai
bosi
sMrl
oadedwant
syoucan’
t
y
ouseet
hat
”
“
He’
sjustbei
nggener
oust
hat
’sal
l
”
“
Iknowt
heset
hingsj
ustwat
chandsee
sot
ell
meam Ii
nvi
tedt
otheweddi
ng?
”
“
Nounf
ort
unat
ely
”
“
ComeonGuguIhav
enev
erbeena
weddi
ngofacel
ebr
it
yI’
m sur
eMi
racan
addoneguest
sont
heguestl
i
stoht
wo
wi
thMrHandsome”
“
Ket
ty….
.”
“
Thanky
ousomuch”sheki
ssesmy
cheekandwal
ksaway
.Ther
estoft
he
daygoeswel
lat5pm Iknockout
.I’
m so
t
ir
edIj
ustwantt
otakeashower
,eat
andsl
eep.It
akeacabt
omyapar
tment
andr
etur
nMi
ra’
smi
ssedcal
l
s
“
HeyGugz
”
“
HeybabeI
’
m sor
ryImi
ssedy
ourcal
l
s
y
ouknowwear
enotal
l
owedt
ohav
e
ourphoneswi
thusatwor
k”
“
Ohy
esIf
igur
edhowar
eyout
hough?
”
“
Iwaswi
thy
ouj
usty
est
erdayMi
ra”
“
So?
”Igi
ggl
e
“
I’
mfi
newena”
“
I’
m al
sogood….
uhm Idi
dsomet
hing
pl
easedon’
tbemadatme”
“
Whatdi
dyoudo”
“
Isawy
ourmom t
odayandsheasked
mey
ouraddr
ess.I
’
m sor
ry”
“
Whatdoesshewantshenegl
ect
edme
mos!
”
“
I’
m sor
ryGugu”
“
It
’sf
ine”
“
I’
m sor
ryonceagai
nIcoul
dn’
tref
use”
“
It
’sokayMi
radon’
tst
ressabouti
t.I
hav
etogo”
“
Shar
p”Ihangupandpayt
hedr
iver
.
Uponar
ri
val
Ifi
ndmom wi
tht
hesecur
it
y
guar
d.
“
Hel
l
oMi
ssNcubey
ourmom…”
“
It
’sf
inecomemom”Shef
oll
owsme
behi
nd,
west
epi
ntot
heel
evat
orandI
pr
ess5t
hfl
oor
.
“
Howar
eyoumt
anami
”
“
I’
mfi
nemom”
“
Mir
a….
”
“
Shet
oldmecome”west
epoutoft
he
el
evat
orandwal
ktomyr
oom.
“
Thi
spl
acei
sbeaut
if
ul”shesay
s
r
oami
ngherey
esar
ound.Ther
e’sone
bedr
oom,
onebat
hroom andopenpl
an
ki
tchenandl
ounge.
“
Youwantsomet
hingt
odr
ink”
“
Teasi
swi
l
lbeokay
”shewal
kst
othe
couchandset
tl
esdownwhi
l
eImaket
ea
f
orher
.OnceI
’
m doneIt
aket
het
rayand
wal
ktot
hel
ounge.Ipl
acet
het
rayon
t
hecof
feet
abl
eandset
tl
edown
“
Thanky
ousi
s”shepour
ssugarand
mi
l
kinhert
eaandst
ir
s
“
Mom whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?”
“
Icamet
ocheckony
oumydaught
er”
“
Ohr
eal
l
ynowy
our
emembery
ouhav
ea
daught
er”
“
BabyIknowt
hatIhav
en’
tbeenagood
mom…”Icutherof
f
“
Yesmom y
ouhav
en’
tbeenagood
mom!Tel
lmewhyy
ounev
erst
oodup
f
ormet
odadhuh?
”
“
Youknowhowy
ourf
atheri
sGugu.
”
“
Idon’
tcar
emama!Youar
emymot
her
y
ouwer
esupposedt
odosomet
hing.
Howcany
ouwat
chhi
mthr
owy
our
daught
eri
nthest
reetbecauseofa
l
ousycour
se,
abl
oodyst
upi
dcour
se!
”
“
Babyy
ouhav
eev
eryr
ightt
obeangr
y.
I
’
m sor
ryImi
ssy
ousi
sweal
lmi
ssy
ou”
Il
aughl
oudl
y
“
Youar
ejoki
ngr
ight
?”
“
Nomyl
oveI
’
m notj
oki
ng.Youf
atheri
s
sor
ryf
ort
hewayhet
reat
edy
ouhe
r
eal
i
zest
hathewast
oohar
sht
oyou”
“
Idon’
tunder
standwhydi
dhehadt
obe
t
hathar
shj
ustf
oracour
se.It
ri
ed
mamaf
ort
woy
ear
sst
udy
ingt
hat
st
upi
dcour
sebutIf
ail
ed!Whatmor
edi
d
hewant
edf
ormehuh?
”
“
Pleasecal
m downmt
anami
”
“
Ineedanswer
smamaIt
ri
edt
obet
he
bestdaught
ery
ouguy
scoul
dev
erhav
e.
Ist
udi
edacour
set
hatInev
erwant
ed
f
rom t
hef
ir
stpl
acebecauseIwant
edt
o
pr
ovemy
sel
ftoDad.ThemomentI
deci
dedt
odowhatIwant
edhechased
meoutont
hest
reet
.Li
fehav
ebeenhel
l
f
ormemamaIdi
dthi
ngst
hatI
’
m not
pr
oudof
.Igav
ebi
rt
htoconj
oinedt
wins
andIneededy
ousobadbuty
ouwer
en’
t
t
her
eforme.Thehar
destdeci
sionIev
er
hadt
omakei
nmyl
i
fewast
oswi
tchof
f
t
hemachi
nesbecausel
i
fewasnev
er
goi
ngt
obenor
mal
fort
hem.Doy
ou
knowhowpai
nful
thatwasf
ormeIwi
sh
y
ouwer
ethemamaj
ustt
ohol
dme
t
ight
lyi
nyourar
msandt
ell
mei
twi
l
lbe
okay
.Ibur
iedmyboy
s,y
ourf
ir
st
gr
andsonswi
thouty
ou.Ineededy
oubut
y
ouwer
enev
ert
her
e”Il
etoutal
oudsob
“
I’
m sor
rybabyI
m sososor
ry”shepul
l
s
met
oherar
msaf
terput
ti
nghert
eaon
t
hecof
feet
abl
e
“
I’
m sor
ryf
orev
ery
thi
ngy
ouwent
t
hroughmybabypl
easef
orgi
veme.I
wantt
omaket
hingsr
ight
”shecr
adl
es
mel
i
keababyasIsob.Lor
dknowshow
muchImi
ssedherembr
ace.Ical
m
downaf
terawhi
l
eandpul
lbackf
rom
herembr
ace
“
Whydadhat
esmet
hismuchmom?
Whathav
eev
erIdonet
ohi
m”
“
Youdi
dnot
hingbabyy
ourf
atherhada
r
oughchi
l
dhood.Thei
rfat
herwasv
ery
st
ri
ctandhar
dtot
hem sohe’
srai
sing
y
ouguy
sthewayhi
sfat
herdi
dandhe
t
hinksi
t’
sther
ightway
”Il
ookatherand
Icanseet
hatshe’
shi
dingsomet
hing.
“
Mom y
ouowemeanswer
s”
“
Idon’
tknowwhaty
ouar
etal
ki
ng
about
!”
“
Mom”
“
He’
snoty
ourf
ather
!”What
?

Ihearscr
eamscomi
ngf
rom my
daught
er’
sbedr
oom andr
unt
oher
.
“
What
’swr
ong?
”
“
Theshweshwedoesnotf
itmom!
”Ir
oll
myey
esMi
rai
sdr
amat
icy
az.Ial
most
hadahear
tat
tack
“
WhatI
’
m goi
ngt
odoI
’
m get
ti
ng
mar
ri
edt
hisweekendmom!
”shecr
ies
“
Heyr
elaxokayIcanf
ixt
his”
“
Howy
ousai
dthi
smat
eri
ali
sscar
ce!
”
That
’st
ruebutI
’
mtr
yingt
omakeher
cal
m her
e.Herweddi
ngi
sont
his
weekendwhi
chmeansIhav
eonl
y3
day
stof
ixhershweshwedr
ess.Ther
e’s
goi
ngt
obeat
radi
ti
onal
weddi
ngf
ir
st
whi
chwi
l
lbeatt
hegr
oomspl
acet
hen
l
ateri
t’
sgoi
ngt
obeawhi
teweddi
ng
whi
chwi
l
lbeatt
hebeach.Thel
ove
bi
rdswantasunsetbeachwhi
te
weddi
ng,
isn’
tthatr
omant
icpaki
thi
.
“
Iwi
l
lmakeapl
an”
“
Mom…”Icutherof
fwi
thaki
ssonher
l
i
ps
“
Hav
eIev
erl
ety
oudown?
”Sheshakes
herheadno
“
Goodnowst
opst
ressi
ngmommywi
l
l
f
ixt
his”Iwi
pehert
ear
sandhugher
.
“
Getr
eadyLeei
sgoi
ngt
obeher
einf
ew
mi
nut
es”
“
Idon’
tfeel
li
kegoi
ngoutany
mor
e”
“
ComebabyIt
oldy
ouIwi
l
lfi
xthi
s.”
Unbeknownt
ohert
heyhador
gani
zeda
bachel
oret
tepar
ty.I
t’
shadt
obet
oni
ght
becauset
omor
rowwear
egoi
ngt
o
eDumbe.
“
OkaymommyIl
ovey
ou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oobaby
.Nowgetr
eady
”I
t
akehershweshwedr
essandwal
kto
t
hel
oungewher
eIwasbusywi
thher
ot
hershweshwedr
esst
hatf
it
sherwel
l
.
She’
sbecomi
nghugebyt
hedaybut
don’
ttel
lherIsai
dthat
.Kamar
iai
swi
th
herf
atheri
nDur
ban,
Mpendul
othati
s
andhesai
dshewi
l
lbr
inghert
oDumbe
onFr
iday
.Thepast3weekshav
ebeen
busy
.Khany
iwasbur
iedi
nDumbeandI
mustsaywebur
iedherwi
thdi
gni
ty.I
sawt
heboyandher
eal
l
ylooksl
i
ke
Khuz
ani
.Iknewt
hathei
shi
sson.
Thi
ngsbet
weenusar
est
il
lthesame
andIhav
en’
ttol
dhi
m aboutt
he
pr
egnancybecausehe’
snotgi
vi
ngmea
chancet
ospeakt
ohi
m.Hedespi
sesme
andhecan’
tev
enhi
dei
t.Thet
hingshe
sai
dtomeatt
hef
uner
albr
okemyhear
t
i
npi
eces.Ut
hi“
I’
m notst
rongenought
o
behi
swi
fe”Ri
ghtt
her
eandt
henI
deci
dedt
hatI
’
m donebeggi
nghi
m.
Khuz
ani
isf
ull
ofhi
msel
fmx
m!The
weddi
ngpr
epar
ati
onshav
ebeen
keepi
ngmebusyt
othi
nkabouthi
m.I
m
showi
ngnowbutmybabyhasn’
tst
art
ed
ki
cki
ngI
m wor
ri
edbecauseI
’
m 21
weekspr
egnantnowbutmy
gy
necol
ogi
stsai
dIhav
enot
hingt
o
wor
ryabout
.Thi
spr
egnancyi
str
eat
ing
mewel
lsomet
imesIf
orgett
hatI
’
m
pr
egnant
.
“
I’
m donemom.Leei
sout
side”
“
Okaybabyenj
oyy
our
sel
f”
“
Thanky
oumommy
”sheki
ssesmy
cheekanddashesout
.It
akeherdr
ess
andl
ookati
t.Idon’
tknowhowam I
goi
ngt
opul
lthi
sof
fwi
thshor
tmat
eri
al.
“
Ineedagl
assofmi
l
k”Igetupf
rom t
he
couchandshuf
fl
emyf
eett
otheki
tchen.
Ipourmy
sel
fagl
assofmi
l
kandgul
pit
al
ldownt
henpouranot
herone.Ther
e’s
someoneont
hedoor
.Iopeni
tandI
’
m
sur
pri
sedt
oseehi
m.
“
K”
“
Wher
e’smydaught
er”Hepusheshi
s
wayi
n
“
That
’ssor
udehowabouthel
l
oBonga
howar
eyou?
”
“
Iwantmydaught
erBonga.Emi
hle!
”
“
Ther
e’snoEmi
hleher
e!”
“
Youar
ely
ing”
“
Iswear
”Het
ri
est
owal
ktot
he
bedr
oom butIgr
abhi
sar
m
“
Youhi
dingher
!”
“
Whywoul
dIhi
deherwhat
’sgoi
ngon?
”
Hel
ooksatmei
ntheey
esandsi
ghs
heav
il
y
“
NoBongapl
easet
ell
meshe’
sher
e”Hi
s
ey
esgl
i
stenwi
tht
ear
s
“
What
’sgoi
ngon”Icar
esshi
sfacedon’
t
askmewhybecauseIdon’
tknowbut
seei
nghi
mri
ghtnowl
ooki
ngt
his
desper
atei
sbr
eaki
ngmyhear
t.
“
Emi
hleshel
eftt
hismor
ningandsai
d
she’
scomi
ngher
e”
“
Alone?
”
“
Yes!
”
“
Iwast
alki
ngwi
thhert
hismor
ningon
t
hephoneandsheaskedmyaddr
essI
di
dn’
treal
i
zet
hatshewaspl
anni
ngt
o
comeher
e.ohno!
”
“
Bongaumt
anami
whati
f.
.whati
f…”
“
Heyheyl
et’
snotov
ert
hinkt
hismay
be
she’
sst
il
lont
heway
”
“
Shehasnev
ert
rav
eledal
one,
she’
sonl
y
12y
ear
sol
dBongaohMyl
ord!
”He’
s
pani
cki
ngsoam IbutIhav
etobest
rong
f
orhi
m.
“
Hav
eyout
ri
edherphone”
“
It
’ssendi
ngmet
ovoi
cemai
lBonga
ngenz
eni
!”Hesay
spaci
ngupanddown.
“
Wewi
l
lfi
ndherpl
easedon’
tst
ress”
“
Whati
fsomeonet
ookheranddowhat
godknowswhatt
oher
.Chi
l
dtr
aff
icki
ng
I
mandl
akul
amal
angawhati
f…”
“
Stopi
t!Pl
easeSt
opi
t!
”Isaywi
tha
cr
yingv
oice.
“
Whathav
eIdoneBonga”Hi
stear
s
escapeandIwi
pet
hem wi
thmyt
humbs
“
Emi
hlei
sokay
!She’
sfi
neokay
!”Igi
ve
hi
m at
ighthugandhehol
dsmef
ordear
l
i
fe.If
eel
amov
einmyt
ummy
.Hepul
l
s
backandl
ooksatme
“
Wha.
.what
’st
hatBonga”Hesay
s
l
ooki
ngatmyst
omachandt
ouchesi
t.
“
Ist
hiswhatIt
hinki
tisnoy
ouar
eon
i
nject
ioni
tcan’
tbe”mybabyki
cksagai
n
andhar
dthi
sti
me
“
Snookumsy
ouar
epr
egnant
?”Inod
wi
thmyheadast
ear
sfal
ldownmyf
ace
“
Howar
ear
eyou”
“
22weeks”
“
Ohmyj
aan!
”Hesqueez
esmet
ight
lyi
n
hi
sar
ms.Ican’
tmi
sst
heex
cit
ementi
n
hi
svoi
ce.Hepul
l
sbackandl
ooksatme.
“
Letmegof
indmydaught
erI
’
m not
donewi
thy
ou!Yougoi
ngt
otel
lmewhy
y
ounev
ert
oldmey
ouar
epr
egnant
!”He
wal
ksoutIpr
ayf
ormyl
i
ttl
eEmypl
ease
l
ordpr
otecther
.
HappyBel
atedBi
rt
hdayI
vyLer
ato
Makabe

CHAPTER83
(
Unedi
ted)

If
reez
eforamomentt
ryi
ngt
odi
gest
whatshej
ustsai
d.
“
Whatdi
dyousay
?”Shebur
sti
ntoa
l
oudsob.NotnowwomanIaskedy
oua
quest
ionIdemandananswernott
ear
s!
“
I’
m sosor
rymychi
l
d”
“
Mom whatdoy
oumeanhe’
snotmy
f
ather
?”Iaskwi
thashakyv
oiceas
muchasI
’
m angr
yatmyf
atherbutr
ight
nowIdesper
atel
ywanthert
otel
lme
shewasj
oki
ng.
“
Ihav
edonet
hingst
hatI
’
m notpr
oudof
mychi
l
dpl
easef
orgi
veme”shewi
pes
hert
ear
sbutt
heyar
efal
l
ingr
elent
lessl
y.
“
Tal
kmom st
opbeat
ingar
oundt
he
bush”
“
Lif
ebackt
henwasnoteasymychi
l
d,
womenwer
eli
vi
ngunderoppr
essi
on.
Yourf
ather
’spar
ent
sandmi
newer
e
f
ri
endst
hathowy
ourf
atherandIf
all
in
l
ovebutwewer
ever
ydi
scr
eet
.If
all
pr
egnantandt
hat
’swhenwet
oldour
par
ent
s.Theywer
ever
ydi
sappoi
ntedon
uswewer
esoy
oungIhadt
odr
opoutat
school
becausedur
ingourt
imewewer
e
notal
l
owedatschool
ify
ouar
e
pr
egnant
.Yourf
atherwasal
readydoi
ng
mat
ri
c.Ourpar
ent
sdeci
dedt
hatt
hey
wi
l
lpayf
ory
ourf
ather
’sf
eest
ofur
ther
hi
sst
udi
esngobababekhol
elwaukut
hi
oncehegr
aduat
edhewi
l
lgetagood
pay
ingj
obandt
akecar
eofus.Your
f
atherl
eftt
otheci
tyandIwasl
eftt
o
deal
wit
hthepr
egnancywi
thouthi
m but
Idi
dn’
thav
eapr
obl
em becauseIknew
t
hathewentt
ost
udyf
orus.Igav
ebi
rt
h
t
oababyboybuthepassedonaweek
l
ater
.Iwassobr
okenandt
hepassi
ngof
ourboycausedast
rai
nonour
r
elat
ionshi
phest
art
edcheat
ingand
har
dlycamebackhomeandwhenhe
camei
twoul
dbeadayt
hathowhi
s
br
otherandIgotcl
ose.Hewast
her
efor
meal
lthet
imeonedayonet
hingl
edt
o
anot
herandy
ouwer
econcei
ved.We
kepti
tasecr
etandIpi
nnedt
he
pr
egnantt
oyourf
ather
.Yourf
atherand
hi
sbr
otherdi
dn’
tgetal
ong.Hi
sbr
other
f
eltl
i
key
ourf
atherwast
hel
ovedchi
l
d
whowentt
ofur
therhi
sst
udi
eswhi
l
e
t
heywer
est
arv
ingathome.Hewant
ed
t
ohur
tyourf
ather
’sf
eel
i
ngshet
oldy
our
f
atherhesl
eptwi
thmeandIwas
pr
egnantwi
thhi
schi
l
d.Theyf
ought
phy
sical
l
yandy
ourf
atherhi
thi
sbr
other
onhi
sheadwi
thabi
gst
one.He
col
l
apsedandwasr
ushedt
othe
hospi
tal
hedi
ed3day
slat
er.
”Byt
he
t
imeshef
ini
sheswear
ebot
hcr
yingand
snuf
fl
ing.
“
So.
.so.
.myf
atherwaski
l
ledbyy
our
husband?
”
“
I’
m sosor
rymybaby
”sheat
tempt
sto
t
ouchmebutIy
ankherhandof
fme
“
All
thesey
ear
smamay
oukeptt
his
f
rom me!Nowi
tmakesensewhyy
our
husbandnev
ert
reat
edmewel
l
.I
t
houghti
t’
sbecausehe’
sol
dfashi
oned
andcont
rol
l
ingbutnowI
tmakesense
comet
othi
nkofi
thet
reatmyy
oung
si
ster
sli
ket
heywoul
dbr
eakandI
t
houghti
t’
sbecauset
heyar
est
il
l
y
oung!
”
“
I’
m sor
rymychi
l
d”
“
Howdi
dheendedupmar
ryi
ngy
ou
af
tery
oubet
ray
edhi
m wi
thhi
sbr
other
”
“
Ourl
ovewasst
rongert
hent
he
har
dshi
psweencount
ered.
”
“
Butnotst
rongenought
olov
emeashi
s
chi
l
dandnotst
rongenoughf
ory
out
o
puty
ourf
ootdownandf
ightf
orme!I
m
j
ustani
nnocentchi
l
dmom Iwasn’
t
t
her
ewheny
’al
lbet
rayeachot
herwhy
di
dIhav
etosuf
fert
hisi
sunf
air
!”
“
I’
m sor
rybaby
…”
“
Yoursor
rywon’
tfi
xany
thi
ng.You
wat
chedy
ourhusbandmi
str
eatme
becausey
ouf
eel
gui
l
tyf
orwhaty
oudi
d!
Isuf
fer
edi
nthehandsofy
our
husband’
sandy
ouwat
chedhi
m
becausey
ouwant
edt
oeasey
our
consci
ous!Getoutmama”
“
Baby
…”
“
Out
!”sheget
supf
rom t
hecouchand
wal
ksoutl
eav
ingmebur
sti
ngi
ntot
ear
s.
Ican’
tbel
i
evet
hisIf
eel
li
keI
’
mint
he
mov
ier
ightnow.Ev
ery
thi
ngIt
houghtI
knewt
urnedoutt
obeal
i
einaspl
i
t
second.Icanhearmyr
ingi
ngphone
t
hroughmyl
oudsobs.I
’
mignor
ingi
t
buti
t’
sper
sist
ent
.
“
What
!”
“
Hey
”Hesay
swi
thhi
shuskyv
oiceand
f
orabr
iefmomentIdon’
trepl
ybecause
I
’
m sur
pri
sed.
“
Guguar
eyout
her
e?”I
t’
sreal
l
yhi
m,I
snuf
fl
eandwi
pemyt
ear
squi
ckl
yasi
f
hecanseeme.
“
Heysi
rhowdi
dyougetmynumber
”
“
Arey
oucr
ying?
”
“
NoI
…”
“
Fuckt
hisshi
tcanwai
tI’
m comi
ng!
”He
hangsupandIl
ookatmyphone.
Comi
ngwher
eandwhogav
ehi
m my
number
?It
ossmyphoneasi
deandl
i
e
ont
hecouchl
ett
ingi
tal
lout
.I’
m
st
art
ingt
ofal
lasl
eepont
hecouchwhen
myphoner
ings.I
t’
sthesecur
it
ysay
ing
t
her
e’saVuki
l
ieguyt
hatwantt
oseeme
andIt
ell
himt
oletmei
n.Ir
usht
othe
bat
hroom andwashmyf
acehecan’
t
seemepuf
fywi
tht
ear
sandsnor
tal
l
ov
ermyf
ace.Il
ookmy
sel
foncemor
e
t
imei
nthemi
rr
orwhenI
’
m done.
“
I’
m nott
hatbad”Iconv
incemy
sel
fand
got
oopent
hedoorf
orhi
m.Hel
ooks
l
i
keasnackandhi
spr
esencei
smaki
ng
meweaki
ntheknees.
“
Hey
”Hedoest
heunt
hinkabl
eand
env
elopsmei
nhi
sar
ms.Hi
sembr
ace
t
ri
gger
stear
sandIcoul
dn’
thel
pmy
sel
f.
“
It
’sokayPapai
sher
enowshhhdon’
t
cr
y”Hewhi
sper
sinmyearsendi
ng
chi
l
lsdownmyspi
ne.

Idon’
tknowwhatt
hismani
sdoi
ngt
o
meIt
oldmy
sel
fthatwhenhecomes
backt
obegmeandapol
ogi
zeIwi
l
ltel
l
hi
mtogot
ohel
lbutseei
nghi
mjust
mel
tedmyhear
tandt
hest
atehewasi
n
di
dn’
thel
p.GodIhat
ethel
oveIhav
efor
t
hismanbecausei
t’
swhatmademet
o
per
sev
erenomat
terhowVusi
treat
ed
me.Imadeav
owt
omy
sel
fthatI
’
m not
goi
ngt
ost
andanyman’
sbul
l
shi
taf
ter
t
hepai
nandsuf
fer
ingVusi
putme
t
hrought
hatsomet
imesIex
agger
ateor
ov
err
eact
.Igetwher
eK’
scomi
ngf
rom
i
t’
snott
hatIdon’
tlov
ehi
m Idol
ovehi
m
andmor
ethenIhav
eev
erl
oveamani
n
myl
i
fet
het
hingi
sI’
m scar
ed.I
’
m
scar
edoft
hepowerhi
slov
epossess.I
don’
twantt
ofi
ndmy
sel
fthr
ought
hat
hel
lhol
eIwasi
nyear
sbackbecauseof
t
hef
ourl
ett
erwor
dLOVE.IguessMi
ra
wasr
ightsomehowI
’
m puni
shi
ngKf
or
Vusi
’
ssi
ns.Si
gh!Thatmandi
da
numberonme.Myt
her
api
stoncesai
d
“
Don’
tal
l
owsomeonewhohashur
tyou
t
akesomuchspacei
nyourl
i
fet
haty
ou
endupl
osi
ngy
ourownpower
sof
heal
i
ng”I
t’
sti
meIputt
hesewor
dsi
nto
use.I
’
mtr
yingt
okeepbusybycooki
ng
butmymi
ndi
swi
thmydaught
er.Ihope
she’
sokaywher
evershei
s,herf
ather
wi
l
lfi
ndhersaf
e.Ti
mei
s6pm nowI
’
m
get
ti
ngwor
ri
edbyeachsecondt
hat
passes.It
akemyphoneandcal
lK
“
Snookums”
“
Hav
eyouf
oundher
?”
“
NoI
’
m st
il
lsear
chi
ng”
“
Pleasekeepmeupdat
ed”
“
Okay
”Ihangupandt
ossmyphone
away
.Ipourmy
sel
fagl
assofmi
l
kand
wal
ktot
hel
ounget
ryi
ngt
orel
axont
he
couch,
bef
oremybut
tcomesi
ncont
act
wi
tht
hecouchIhearasof
tknockont
he
door
.
“
Mommy
!”shescr
eamswi
thj
oyt
he
momentIopent
hedoorandt
hrowsher
chubbysel
finmyar
ms
“
Emmy
!”Ienv
elopeheri
nmyar
msand
sni
ffhersweetscent
.Oht
hanky
oul
ord!
“
Babyar
eyouokay
?”Ipul
lbackand
sear
chher
,looki
ngf
oranybr
uises.
“
Ther
ushi
nyourf
acewhathappened?
”
“
Idon’
tknowbutI
’
m okaymom r
elax
”
“
Emydon’
ttel
lmet
orel
axy
out
rav
eled
al
onef
rom Dur
bant
oher
ewi
thoutour
knowl
edgehowcoul
dyoudot
hat
?What
i
fyougothur
t!
”
“
ButIdi
dn’
tmommy
”
“
Goshy
ouhaduswor
ri
edEmi
hle!Your
f
atherwasher
eandhewassowor
ri
ed!
”
“
Don’
tshoutpl
ease”Isi
gh
“
I’
m sor
ryi
tjustt
haty
ouscar
edus.
Pl
easedon’
tdot
hatagai
n.Youcan’
t
t
rav
elal
onewi
thoutany
one’
s
per
missi
ondoy
ouhearme”
“
I’
m sor
rymommyf
orwor
ryi
ngy
ou.I
mi
ssedy
ou”
“
Imi
ssedy
out
oosweet
hear
tletmecal
l
y
ourf
ather
”
“
Nodon’
ttel
lhi
m hewi
l
lyel
latme”
“
Hehast
oknowsweet
hear
thewasso
wor
ri
edabouty
ousear
chi
ngy
ou
ev
ery
wher
e”
“
Youdon’
tknowdaddyl
i
keIdomommy
.
He’
sal
way
smoodyandev
ersi
nce
Thandocamei
ntoourl
i
vesi
t’
sli
keI
don’
tex
ist
.Idon’
tli
kehi
m!”Thi
sis
bi
ggert
henIt
hought
.
“
Goputy
ourbagi
nmybedr
oom”she
hasbeenher
eforsev
eral
timesnowso
sheknowswhi
chonei
smi
nebet
ween
t
het
wo.It
akemyphoneont
hecouch
andcal
lK
“
SnookumsIcan’
tfi
n…”
“
Shej
ustar
ri
vedcome”
“
Issheokay
”
“
Yesshe’
sfi
ne”
“
Oht
hanky
ouLor
d!I
’
m comi
ngr
ight
now”Ihangup.Emi
hlel
ooksatmeand
smi
l
es
“
Bengi
khumbul
ayazmama,
whenI
’
m
wi
thy
ouI
’
m al
way
shappy
”Ismi
l
e
“
Imi
ssy
out
oomybaby
.Comesi
tdown
Iwi
l
ldi
shupf
ory
ou”sheset
tl
esdown
ont
hehi
ghchai
r.
“
Didy
oupass?
”
“
Yesmyr
epor
tisi
nmybagIwi
l
lshow
y
ouwhenI
’
m doneeat
ing.I
’
m st
arv
ing
y
ooh”It
akeapl
atei
nthecupboar
dand
di
shupf
orher
.
“
Howdi
dyougether
eEmi
hle?
”
“
Publ
i
ctr
anspor
tandIaskedar
ound.I
t
wassoeasy
!”
“
Wher
edi
dyougett
hemoney
”
“
Uhm Iwassav
ing”Il
ookather
“
Youar
ely
ingEmi
hle”
“
I.
..
I.
.It
ookdaddy
’smoneyi
nhi
ssaf
ety
.”
“
Emi
hley
oust
olemoneyf
rom y
our
f
ather
!”
“
Idi
dn’
tst
eal
mommyIt
ooki
t”
“
Howdoy
ouknowhi
spi
n”I
’
mver
y
cur
iousr
eal
l
ybecauseheal
soputhi
s
guni
nthatsaf
ety
.
“
It
’sy
ourbi
rt
hdayt
hatwaseasy
”
“
KodwaEmi
hlemt
anami
whaty
oudi
dis
v
erywr
ongy
oust
olemoneyf
rom y
our
f
atherandt
rav
elal
onef
rom Dur
bant
o
her
ewi
thoutany
one’
sknowl
edge.
”
“
Ngi
yax
oli
samamaIwant
edt
ocomet
o
y
ouandl
eav
edadwi
thhi
spr
eci
ousson”
herey
esgl
azeswi
thbor
edom.Thedoor
bur
stopenandKwal
ksi
n
“
YewenaEmi
hle!
”Hechar
gest
oherand
Ibl
ockhi
m
“
BongagetoutofmywayIneedt
o
t
eacht
hischi
l
dal
esson!Whogav
eher
aper
missi
ont
otr
avel
all
thewayf
rom
Dur
ban!
!”
“
Khuz
ani
awehl
i
seumoy
a”Emi
hlei
s
hi
dingbehi
ndmeandcr
ying
“
Bongagetoutofmyway
!Emi
hlei
s
act
ingl
i
keaspoi
l
tbr
atnow!
!Iwi
l
lbeat
t
hespoi
l
tbr
att
endenci
esoutofher
!”
“
DaddyI
’
m sor
ry”shecr
iesbehi
ndme
“
Khuz
ani
please.
..
Emi
takey
ourf
ood
andgot
othel
ounge”shet
akesherf
ood
andr
unst
othel
ounge.
“
BongaIwon’
tal
l
owy
out
ospoi
lEmi
hle
l
i
key
oudi
dtoMi
ra!That
’smydaught
er
al
l
owmet
orai
sehermyownf
ucki
ng
way
!”Ichuckl
eandshakemyhead
“
Yourownwaybynegl
ect
ingher
!Thi
s
chi
l
dtr
avel
edal
lthewayf
rom Dur
bant
o
her
ebecauseshef
eel
snegl
ect
ed!Ev
er
si
ncey
ouhav
easony
ounol
ongercar
e
abouther
!Di
dyounot
icet
her
ushonher
f
ace?
”
“
Rushwhatr
ush?
”
“
Howwoul
dyouknowangi
thi
sheno
l
ongerex
istnowbecausey
ouhav
ea
sony
ouhav
eal
way
swant
edt
hina
asi
sabal
uleki
l
eempi
l
weni
yakho.Idon’
t
car
eaboutmy
sel
fI’
m noty
ourf
ami
l
y
nory
ourchi
l
dbutt
hatchi
l
dther
eisy
our
daught
er!I
t’
shasal
way
sbeenhernow
suddenl
yther
e’sasonandshef
eel
sli
ke
he’
staki
ngherpl
aceandy
ounol
onger
car
eabouther
.Iknowt
hel
astt
hingy
ou
wanti
sfory
ourchi
l
drent
ohat
eeach
ot
heral
readyEmi
hledoesn’
tli
keher
br
otherandt
hat
’snotr
ightatal
l
!”
“
She.
.shet
oldy
oual
loft
his?
”Hesay
s
r
athercal
mly
“
Yes”
“
Itwasnev
ermyi
ntent
ionatal
lBongaI
di
dn’
treal
i
zet
hatIwasnegl
ect
ingher
.
I
’
m sosor
ry”
“
Youar
eapol
ogi
zi
ngt
oawr
ongper
son.
Gof
ixy
ourr
elat
ionshi
pwi
thy
our
daught
ernow!
”Hehugsmet
ight
lyand
headst
othel
ounge.Ishakemyheadi
n
di
sbel
i
efuy
angi
kwat
isal
oml
i
say
az!Few
mi
nut
esl
aterIt
akeaqui
ckpeepat
t
hem.Emi
hlei
sonherf
ather
’sl
ap
pl
ayi
ngwi
thhi
sbear
ed.
“
Ilov
eyoudaddy
”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomyl
i
ttl
eangel
”myhear
t
mel
ts.Igobackt
oki
tchenandwasht
he
di
shes.If
eel
hishandssnaki
ngar
ound
mywai
standr
estonmyt
ummy
.
GoosebumpspopsonmybodyasIf
eel
hi
swar
mthbr
eat
heagai
nstmyneck.
“
Thanky
ousomuchst
handwasami
I
di
dn’
treal
i
zet
hedamageIhav
edone.I
don’
tknowwhatI
’
dbewi
thouty
ou.
”I
chuckl
eandt
urnar
oundt
ofacehi
m.
“
It
’sagoodt
hingt
haty
out
wof
ixed
t
hingsy
oucangonow”
“
Hawusnookums”
“
Don’
thowsnookumsmeK”
“
Imi
ssy
ou”
“
Arey
our
eal
l
ygoi
ngt
oactl
i
kenot
hing
happenedbet
weenus”
“
I’
m not
hingwi
thouty
oubaby
bengi
qini
sai
khandanj
engent
o
engekho.
”
“
Ohr
eal
l
y”
“
Yesr
eal
l
ymyj
aan.Umuhl
eyazt
he
pr
egnancyl
ovesy
oudon’
tgetmewr
ong
y
ouhav
eal
way
sbeenbeaut
if
ulmar
a
manj
euy
impent
shi
si”Ibl
ush.Het
ugs
myweav
ebehi
ndmyearasi
fhewant
s
t
ogetacl
earv
iewofmyf
ace.Bonga
getagr
ipofy
our
sel
fthi
smanbr
oke
y
ourhear
t!
“
Yousai
dI’
m notst
rongenought
obe
y
ourwi
feKhuz
ani
sopl
easedon’
tcome
her
eandex
pectmet
hatIwi
l
lwel
come
y
ouwi
thwar
m hands.
”
“
Kukhul
umekekabi
sthandwasami
ngi
yax
oli
sa.Ther
ewasal
otgoi
ngon
andIt
ookoutmyf
rust
rat
ionsony
ou
baby
.I’
m sor
ry”
“
Thet
hingsy
ousai
dbr
okemyhear
tK
y
oumademef
eel
notwor
thyofbei
ng
y
ourwoman”
“
I’
m sor
ryI
mtheonewho’
snotwor
thy
ofbei
ngy
ourman.I
’
mful
lofshi
tit
can’
tbeeasyf
ory
oudeal
i
ngwi
th
di
ff
erentwomenev
erynowandt
hen.
I
’
m sor
rymyl
ovepl
easef
orgi
veme”He
goesdownonhi
sknees
“
Pleasegi
vemeasecond3r
dchance
ngi
yaz
icel
elamaMt
himkhul
u.Iwantno
oneel
sebuty
oubaby
”
“
NoKhuz
ani
getupandl
eav
e”
“
BabyI
…”Heget
supqui
ckl
yandr
usht
o
t
hebat
hroom.If
oll
owhi
m andf
indhi
m
t
hrowi
ngup.
“
Arey
ouokay
”Isaybr
ushi
nghi
sback
“
DoIl
ookokayt
oyou!
”Heget
supand
washhi
smout
hthenf
lushest
het
oil
et.
“
Ihav
ebeenf
eel
i
ngl
i
keshi
tforweeks
now!I
’
m al
way
sfat
igued,
nauseousand
t
hrowi
ngup.Ican’
tst
omachany
thi
ng”I
l
ookathi
m andsmi
l
e
“
Hor
monesgoty
oubyt
hebal
l
s”
“
Hor
mones”
“
Themor
ningsi
cknessdummy
”He
chuckl
es
“
Fucknowi
t’
smakesensewhenwi
l
l
t
hisshi
tst
opI
’
m dy
ingher
e”Il
augh
i
drama!
“
Youwon’
tdi
erel
ax.
..
comel
etgety
ou
somet
hingt
oeat
”
“
Ithoughty
ousai
dImustl
eav
e”He
smi
rks
“
Youwi
l
lleav
ewheny
ouar
edone
eat
ing”
“
ComeonIknowy
oumi
ssedy
our
DaddyK”Hepul
l
smecl
oset
ohi
msel
f
andIr
eal
l
ymi
ssedhi
m.
“
Aveuz
itshel
ayaz
”(Youar
eful
lof
y
our
sel
f)
Hegi
ggl
es
“
Chaphel
angi
tshel
eifngi
namanga”
(
Tel
lmei
fI’
mly
ing)Het
akesmyhand
andmakemef
eel
hiscr
otch.
“
Don’
tyoumi
sst
hat
”Ibi
temyl
i
p
i
nvol
unt
ari
l
ythef
eel
ofhi
sbul
gei
nmy
handmakesmeweti
nst
ant
ly.I
t’
sbeena
whi
l
eaf
teral
l
!Icapt
urehi
sli
psandhe
r
eci
procat
est
heki
ss.I
naspl
i
tsecond
I
’
m hol
dingont
het
oil
etseatandhe’
s
t
hrust
ingi
ntomehar
dfr
om behi
nd.
“
OhhhKohhhmyGoodness!
!”
“
Babyy
ouar
esol
oud”
“
Ohsor
ry”wehearasof
tknockont
he
door
“
Mommyi
sev
ery
thi
ngokay
”
“
Uhm.
.y
ess.
..
sweet
y!”
“
Arey
ousur
e?Icany
ouheary
ou
scr
eami
ng”
“
Ifel
lbabybut
..
.but
..
.ahhhuhm f
ine!
”
“
CanIcomei
n”
“
GoodnessEmi
hley
ourmot
heri
sfi
ne
she’
swi
thmegowat
cht
v!”Hegr
owl
s
sev
eral
har
d,f
astt
hrust
sandwebr
eak
apar
tinuni
son.

Theweddi
ngpr
epar
ati
onsar
egoi
ngwel
l
,
myweddi
ngpl
annergotev
ery
thi
ng
undercont
rol
butI
’
m suchawr
eckt
hese
day
smyemot
ionsar
eal
lov
ert
hepl
ace.
“
Stopst
ressi
ngandr
elax
”Leesay
snex
t
t
omewho’
staki
ngmeGodknows
wher
e.
“
I’
m get
ti
ngbi
gev
erysecondLeeand
myseshweshwedoesnotf
it
”myv
oice
i
scr
acki
ngI
’
m cl
osef
rom br
eaki
ng
down
“
Yourmom wi
l
lfi
xitst
handwasami
”
“
Shesai
dthatmat
eri
ali
sscar
ceandI
l
ovet
hatonemor
ethent
heot
her
.Idon’
t
t
hinkshewi
l
lbeabl
etof
ixi
twi
thi
n3
day
s”
“
Hav
efai
thi
nyourmom Mi
ray
azt
his
st
ressi
snotnecessar
yandi
t’
stoo
muchf
ort
hebaby
.St
aycal
mforhi
m
okay
”InodasIwi
pemyt
ear
s.
“
Wear
eher
e”shesay
saf
terpul
l
ingof
f
andgoest
omysi
det
oopent
hedoorf
or
me.Ist
epoutoft
hecar
.
“
Wher
ear
ewe?
”
“
Q&Ql
odge”
“
Whyar
eweher
e”
“
Youaskt
oomuchquest
ionsMi
ra
come”Shet
akesmyhandandwear
e
makeourwayi
n.
“
SURPRI
SE!
!!
”Ij
umpupwi
thshock
hol
dingmyt
ummy
.
“
Jesusy
ouguy
swantmet
ogi
vebi
rt
h
now!
”Theyal
lgi
ggl
eandapol
ogi
ze.
Ev
eryf
emal
ecol
l
eague,
cousi
nand
f
ri
endi
sher
eex
ceptGugu.Ther
e’sal
so
Nosher
e.
“
What
’sgoi
ngon”
“
Wel
comet
oyourbachel
oret
tepar
ty
babes”Leesay
s.Il
ookathert
henNos.
“
Uhm shei
nsi
stedt
hatsheputahand
i
ntot
hispar
tyt
oshowy
ouhowmuch
sor
ryshei
sandt
hatshe’
sov
ery
our
man.Herpar
ent
sownst
hisl
odge”
“
Oh”Isaywi
thal
owv
oice.Idon’
ttr
ust
t
hatgi
rlandIwi
l
lnev
erwi
l
l.Sboshgi
ves
meahugt
henshepassesmet
oAy
anda
whopassesmet
otheot
hercousi
n.I
swearIf
eel
li
keani
nfantwhobei
ng
passedonf
rom oneper
sont
otheot
her
.
Thel
astper
soni
sNosandshegi
vesme
hugofwhi
chIdon’
tret
urn.
“
Uhm canwet
alki
npr
ivat
e”shedoesn’
t
wai
tformet
oagr
eebutt
akesmyhand
andIhav
enochoi
cebutt
ofol
l
owher
.
“
I’
m sor
ryaboutt
hatdayInev
ermeant
t
ocauseanyt
roubl
e.Idon’
tknowhow
di
dIf
all
inl
ovewi
thLwandl
ebecauseI
hav
eal
way
sknownt
hathel
ovesonl
y
y
ouIguessact
ingashi
sgi
rl
fr
iend
somehowgott
omyhead.I
’
mver
ysor
ry
Mi
raIdi
dn’
tmeant
odi
srespecty
ou.
Wheny
ouwer
emi
ssi
ngheuset
ocome
t
omypl
aceandwewi
l
lcr
ytoget
herf
or
y
ou.Thatguyl
ovesy
ouMi
raandonl
y
y
ouIwantust
oputt
hisbehi
ndusand
mov
eonpl
ease.
”
“
Uhm okay
”Idon’
tknowwhatt
osay
r
eal
l
y
“
Thanky
ousomuch,
thi
sisy
ourni
ght
gi
rlsopl
easeenj
oyi
t”Inodwi
thaf
aint
smi
l
e.Andi
mthembi
tul
ogi
rll
etmej
ust
sayIt
rustnowomanwheni
t’
scomest
o
mymanbutIhav
enowor
ri
esbecauseI
t
rustmyman.Wej
oinot
her
s.
“
Let
’sgett
hispar
tyst
art
ed!
”Nos
scr
eamsandt
hel
adi
escheer
s.
“
Comeduz
ebapi
za”Sboshsay
spat
ti
ng
aspacenex
ttoher
.Icanseeshe’
sti
psy
al
ready
.Thi
sgi
rli
sst
ressi
ngmeout
she’
sal
way
sdr
unkev
ersi
nceshebr
oke
upwi
thherboy
fri
endLi
ndani
.
Remembert
hatt
heywer
etr
yingf
ora
babymont
hsbackwi
thnol
uckandt
hat
becameast
rai
nont
hei
rrel
ati
onshi
p
unt
ilt
heybr
okeup.Iset
tl
enex
ttoher
andLeegi
vesmenonal
cohol
champagneandf
ingerf
ood.
“
Howar
eyoubhepi
”
“
I’
mfi
neasy
oucansee!
”
“
Sboshy
oudon’
thav
etopr
etendwi
th
me”
“
Toni
ghtIj
ustwantt
ogetdr
unkpl
ease
l
et’
snott
alkaboutt
hatasshol
e!”
“
Not
ed”
I
’
m hav
ingbestofmyni
ghtwi
tht
he
l
adi
es.Theconv
ersat
ioni
sget
ti
ng
l
ouderbyt
hesecondast
heyar
eget
ti
ng
dr
unknow.
“
Okayi
t’
sti
mef
orpr
ezz
ies!
”Ay
anda
say
sandt
hel
adi
escheer
s.Iwi
shGugu
i
sher
eyazIknowt
hatt
heydi
dn’
tinf
orm
herbecauset
heydon’
tknowmuch
abouther
.It
ri
edt
ocal
lherear
li
eronbut
herphonesentmet
ovoi
cemai
l
.
“
Okaybuy
ingagi
ftf
orsomeonewho
hasmoneyl
i
key
oui
squi
tedi
ff
icul
tbutI
hopey
ouwi
l
lli
kemygi
ft
.Her
egoes”
shehandsmeagi
ftbagandi
t’
san
educat
ional
bookaboutbei
ngagood
wi
fet
oyourhusband
“
OhYandat
hanky
ousomuch”weshar
e
ahug.
“
I’
m nex
t!”Ly
nnsay
str
yingt
ogetupbut
f
all
sandwebur
sti
ntol
aught
er,
she’
s
dr
unkl
i
kehel
l
.Ly
nni
smal
ume
Thembi
nkosi
’
sdaught
er.Leehel
psher
up.
“
Okaymi
naIgoty
out
hisf
ragr
anceuse
i
tonl
yify
ouwantt
oseducey
our
husband.
”
“
Thanky
ousomuchLy
nn”Ihughert
oo.
Ev
ery
onegi
vesmet
hei
rpr
ezz
iesIl
ove
t
hem al
l
.IknewSboshuz
ophuma
ecel
eni
nje.I
t’
sabi
gboxt
hathasev
ery
sext
oys.
“
Youar
eonenaught
ygi
rl
!”shegi
ggl
es
“
Iusual
l
yhearmar
ri
edpeopl
eespeci
all
y
mencompl
aini
ngt
hatt
hei
rwi
vesar
eno
l
ongergi
vi
ngt
hem t
hecakeast
heyuse
t
obef
oret
heygotmar
ri
ed.Lal
elake
babesIwanty
ourmant
osayt
he
opposi
te.Ngi
funaaz
eaz
isol
eukut
hi
ebengakushadi
ngani
sonkel
esi
khat
hi.
Upy
oursexgamedar
li
ngandmake
sur
ethatev
eni
fhet
hinksofcheat
inghe
woul
dknowukut
hiaykodwanoone
gi
vesmel
i
kemywi
fe.Tease,
suckt
hose
bal
l
sandr
idet
hatcockbaby
!”The
l
adi
escheer
sonher
.
“
Nowi
t’
sti
mef
ort
hebi
gpr
ezz
ief
rom
al
lofus”Leest
umbl
est
othedoorand
opensi
t.Twohunkswal
kinhal
fnaked.
Damn!Ther
oom er
upt
swi
thscr
eams.
Leet
urnsont
hemusi
candt
hehunksdo
t
hei
rst
ri
pdance.Oneoft
hem wal
kst
o
meanddancei
nfr
ontofmedz
amm
Godknewwhathewasdoi
ngwhenhe
cr
eat
edmal
especi
es.Ibi
temyl
i
p
i
nvol
unt
ari
l
yasIgaz
eonhi
sdi
ckpr
int
.
OhGodt
hisi
swr
ongIcan’
tbet
urnedon
f
oranot
hermanIbl
amei
tont
he
pr
egnancy
.Het
akesast
rawber
ryf
rom
mybowl
ofst
rawber
ri
esi
nmyhandand
di
psi
tont
hechocol
atet
henshov
eiti
n
mymout
hseduct
ivel
y.Thef
eel
ofhi
s
t
ouchagai
nstmyt
highbr
ingsbackt
o
ear
th.Ipushhi
m andgetupt
hengot
o
t
hel
adi
es.ShhuuuuIneedt
obr
eat
he!I
donumberoneandgr
oani
nfr
ust
rat
ion
att
hesi
ghtofmywetpant
iesmi
ndy
ouI
di
dn’
twearanypent
yli
ner
.Myphone
r
ingsIsweart
hismanhasawayof
f
eel
i
ngmewhenI
’
m upt
onogood.
“
Cuddl
ecakes”I
tcomesoutasa
whi
sper
“
Whyar
eyouwhi
sper
ing”Igi
ggl
e
“
Imi
ssy
ou”
“
Imi
ssy
out
oobabyhow’
sthe
bachel
oret
tepar
tygoi
ng”
“
Youknewabouti
t”
“
YesbabyIhopey
ouar
eenj
oyi
ng”
“
Yesmyl
ove”
“
Dol
l
facewhat
’sgoi
ngon”
“
Whatdoy
oumean”
“
Iknowy
ourv
oicewheny
ouar
ehor
ny”
“
I’
m nothor
nybaby
”
“
Dol
l
face!
”
“
Theyhi
redst
ri
pper
sbabyI
’
m sor
ry”
“
Youar
ehor
nyf
oranot
herman
dol
l
face”
“
It
’snotmei
t’
syourson”
“
Hay
imysoni
snotgaybaby
”
“
Mir
a!”Sboshscr
eamsf
rom t
heot
her
si
deoft
hedoor
“
Ihav
etogobaby
”
“
Okayst
handwasami
ngi
yakut
handa”
“
Ngi
yakut
handanami
kakhul
u”Iputmy
phonei
nmypocketandwi
pemy
sel
f
cl
eant
hengetdr
essed.
“
Mir
a!”
“
I’
m her
eSbosh”Iwal
koutshel
ooksat
me
“
Arey
ouokay
”Inodwi
thmyheadand
shel
aughs.Thel
adi
esbur
sti
nto
l
aught
ert
hemomentwemakeourway
i
n.
Thenex
tmor
ningLeedr
ivesmehome.I
mustsayIhadal
ovel
yni
ght
.The
pr
ezz
iesl
eftwi
thSboshandAy
andat
o
mom Dudu’
shouse.Wewi
l
lgot
o
eDumbeal
ltoget
hert
oday
.
“
Thanky
ousomuchsweet
y”
“
Youar
ewel
come.Iwi
l
lseey
ouFr
iday
ke”weshar
eahugt
henImakemyway
i
n.Myst
omachgr
owl
sast
hesmel
lof
baconhi
tsmynost
ri
l.Daddyi
smaki
ng
br
eakf
astwear
ingmom’
sapr
ononl
yon
t
op.I
’
m sohappyt
oseehi
m Il
astsaw
hi
m weeksbackatKhany
i’
sfuner
al.I
wi
sht
heycanunder
standt
hatwhen
t
heyf
ighti
t’
sal
soaf
fectusast
hei
r
chi
l
dren.
“
Mor
ningDaddy
”Ihughi
mfr
om behi
nd
“
Hel
l
omaf
ungwasewami
unj
ani
”
“
I’
m goodandy
ou”Het
urnsar
oundand
l
ooksatme
“
I’
m al
sof
inemybaby
”Heki
ssesmy
f
orehead
“
I’
m sohappyt
oseey
ou.Imi
ssedy
ou”
“
Imi
ssedy
out
ooy
az”
“
It
’ssmel
l
sni
ceher
eI’
m st
arv
ing”
“
Thef
oodwi
l
lber
eadyi
nasecondcal
l
y
oursi
steri
nyourbedr
oom Iwi
l
lcal
l
y
ourmom”
“
Okay
”Iwal
ktomybedr
oom andf
ind
myl
i
ttl
esi
sterbusyonherphoneandby
t
hesoundofi
tshe’
spl
ayi
nggame.
“
Heyl
i
ttl
esi
s”
“
Mir
a!”Shej
umpsupt
ohugmet
ight
ly.
Emyi
ssuchav
eryaf
fect
ionat
echi
l
d.
“
Someonemi
ssedme”
“
YeahImi
ssedy
ou”
“
Imi
ssedy
out
oo.
..
comebr
eakf
asti
s
r
eady
”
“
How’
sbhul
ulu”shebr
ushesmyt
ummy
“
Stopcal
l
ingmyboybhul
ulu”Ipokeher
noseandshegi
ggl
es.Mom andDadar
e
al
readygat
her
edbyt
het
abl
e.
“
Mor
ningmommy
,mor
ningdaddy
”
Emi
hlesay
ski
ssi
ngt
hei
rcheekst
hen
si
tsdownnex
ttome
“
Mor
ningbaby
”Theybot
hsaysmi
l
ing
“
Thanksf
orbr
eakf
asthoney
”mom say
s
l
ooki
ngatdaddywi
thasmi
l
eonher
f
ace
“
It
’snot
hingmyj
aan”Hepl
ant
sapeck
onherl
i
ps.Emysayapr
ayerandweeat
br
eakf
astov
eral
i
ghtchat
.
“
Howwast
hebachel
oret
tepar
ty”
“
Itwasamaz
ingmama”
“
Iwi
shIwaswi
thy
ouMi
ra.Icoul
dn’
t
sl
eepl
astni
ght
”Emycompl
ains.
“
Hawuwhy
?”Mom asks
“
Youwer
escr
eami
ngt
hewhol
eni
ght
mama.Wer
eyouhav
ingni
ght
mar
esor
somet
hing?
”Il
ookatmom anddadt
he
l
augh.
“
Yesbabyei
shI
’
m sor
ry”ni
ght
mar
esmy
f
oot
!
“
Youwannashar
ewhaty
ourni
ght
mar
es
wer
eaboutmom”shegi
vesmeadeat
h
st
arecausi
ngmeanddadt
olaugh.

I
t’
s3am i
nthemor
ningonaSat
urday
.
I
’
m cov
eredi
nabl
anketofwhi
chIwas
gi
venbymymot
her
.I’
m gr
umpyasf
uck
Idi
dn’
tgetenoughsl
eep.The
Mt
himkhul
u‘
sar
egat
her
edendl
i
ni
y
abadal
aandmkhul
uiscal
l
ingoutt
he
cl
annames,
tel
l
ingt
heancest
orst
hat
I
’
mleav
inghomeandI
’
m goi
ngt
ojoi
n
anot
herf
ami
l
y.Yest
odayi
t’
sthebi
gday
,
wewokeupear
lysot
hatwecanget
ear
lyaswecani
nDur
ban.Lwenkosi
and
Iwant
edt
ost
artt
owi
that
radi
ti
onal
weddi
ngf
ir
stwhi
chi
scal
l
edumaboi
n
ourcul
tur
ethent
hewhi
teweddi
ngwi
l
l
bel
ateront
odayatt
hebeach.The
el
der
sgav
emet
he“
tal
k”y
est
erday
,how
awi
feshoul
dbehav
eandwhat
’snot
.I
pr
omi
set
okeept
hei
rwor
dsi
nmymi
nd
al
way
s.I
t’
sti
met
ogoandt
hecar
sand
t
axi
sar
eout
sideal
readywai
ti
ngf
orus.
Thecar
sar
efort
hef
ami
l
yandt
het
axi
s
ar
efort
hecommuni
ty.The
Mt
himkhul
u’
sar
ever
ypopul
ari
nthi
s
ar
eaandnoonewantt
omi
sst
his
weddi
ng.I
t’
sonl
ynowi
t’
ssi
nki
ngi
nthat
I
’
m get
ti
ngmar
ri
ed,
thatI
’
mleav
ingmy
homeandgoi
ngt
ojoi
nanot
herf
ami
l
y
aswemakeourt
othecar
s
si
ngi
ng.
‘
kwaz
ekwakuhl
eukubekez
ela’
I
f
eel
tear
sst
reami
ngdownmyf
ace.I
hav
emymom onmysi
deandSbosh
who’
smymat
ronofhonor
.Lee,
Ayanda,
Ly
nnandZamaar
emybr
idesmai
ds.I
geti
nmymom’
scarwi
thher
,Sbosh,
LeeandKamar
iawho’
ssl
eepi
ng.
Mal
umeThembi
nkosi
ist
heonewho’
s
dr
ivi
ngmom’
scarandhi
swi
l
lbedr
iven
byhi
swi
fe.
“
Don’
tcr
y”mom say
swi
pingmyt
ear
s.
“
Ithi
nky
oushoul
dsl
eepsokuv
usa
masi
fi
ka”Ir
estmyheadonhershoul
der
andshutmyey
es.
Mom wakesmeupi
ndeedwhenwe
ar
ri
veandt
imei
s7:
00am.Iwaswor
ri
ed
aboutt
heweat
herbecausel
astni
ghti
t
wasdr
izz
li
ngbutt
hesuni
soutand
ev
ery
thi
ngl
ooksbeaut
if
ult
hissi
de.
That
’swhatIl
oveaboutDur
banweat
her
.
Mom cov
ersmyheadwi
thabl
ankett
hat
i
swr
appedar
oundmeaswemakeour
t
othegat
e.Mypeopl
ear
eal
readyon
t
hegat
esi
ngi
ngr
emembert
hatNkosi
househol
disi
nthebur
bssot
hewhi
te
nei
ghbor
sar
est
ari
ngatuswonder
ing
whathappeni
ng.Ihearanot
hersi
ngi
ng
comi
ngf
rom t
heot
hersi
dei
t’
smustbe
t
heNkosi
fami
l
y.BabBheki
ast
hehead
oft
heNkosi
fami
l
ywel
comesmeas
t
hei
rbr
ideandt
hecr
owder
upt
sint
o
ul
ulat
ion.Thecowi
ssl
aught
eredbyt
he
Nkosi
fami
l
yassi
gnt
oshowt
hatt
hey
’re
accept
ingmeast
hei
rbr
ide.
“
Baby
”Mom Zosay
ssqueez
ingmei
n
herar
msaf
terwehav
ebeenshowna
r
oom wewi
l
luse
“
Mama”
“
Whathav
etheydonet
oyouwhyar
e
y
ouupset
”
“
I’
mfi
nemama”
“
Youknowy
ourdaught
eri
nlawdoesn’
t
l
i
kewaki
ngupear
lyi
nthemor
ningI
don’
tknowwhatki
ndofamakot
ishe
woul
dbe”mom say
sandIgi
veherl
ook.
Cel
aengangi
sukel
ipl
easeI
’
m noti
nthe
mood.
“
Ahhshameaski
esmybaby
”Mom Zo
say
sandki
ssesmyl
i
ps
“
I’
m sur
ey’
al
lhungr
yfoodi
scomi
ng”
“
Gogoz
iwher
e’sdaddy
”Kamar
iasay
s
“
Come”shepi
cksherupandt
heywal
k
out
.Fewmi
nut
esl
atert
eaandscones
ar
ebr
oughtt
ous.
“
Thegr
oomsmot
hersay
sthi
sisf
ort
he
br
ide”Thegi
rlgi
vesmeat
rayt
hathas
al
lmycr
avi
ngsf
rom nandos,
chi
cken
f
eetandgi
zzar
dtoagl
assofmaas.
“
Thanky
ou”t
hegi
rlsmi
l
esandwal
ks
outj
ustt
henmom Zowal
ksi
n.
“
Chauy
asi
j
way
elay
azZot
hinausi
nika
amasconesandt
eabuty
ourdaught
er
i
nlawhasal
lhercr
avi
ngs”wel
augh
“
Kwaz
isephel
ashe’
smyoneandonl
y
daught
eri
nlawandshe’
scar
ryi
ngmy
f
ir
stgr
andson”
“
Mxm nami
ngi
yadl
ala”mom say
sand
weal
ll
augh.Oncewear
edoneeat
ingI
f
reshenupandmom hel
psmeget
dr
essed.Byt
het
imeshe’
sdoneIl
ook
l
i
keaZul
ubr
idei
nisdwaba(
leat
herski
rt
)
,
overmywhi
tebr
atopt
hati
sdecor
ated
wi
thbeadsIhav
eisi
cway
awhi
chi
sa
ski
nthatcov
ersmychest
.Ther
e’s
i
nkehl
ionmyheadwi
thbeadscov
eri
ng
t
het
oppar
tofmyf
ace.Onmyf
eetI
’
m
wear
ingawhi
teal
lst
arwhi
chi
s
decor
atedwi
thbeads.Iaccessor
izemy
l
ookwi
thbeadedneckl
acesand
br
acel
ets.Ihav
etoadmi
tIl
ookso
beaut
if
ul.
“
Wow”Igasp
“
Youar
esobeaut
if
ulbaby
”mom say
s
bl
i
nki
ngbackhert
ear
s
“
Thanky
ousomuchmommy
”
“
I’
m sopr
oudofy
oubaby
”
“
Thanky
oumama”weshar
eawar
m
hug.Mybr
idesmai
dst
ooar
eal
sodone
andt
heyl
ookgor
geousi
nthei
r
t
radi
ti
onal
att
ir
e.
“
Umuhl
e”Sboshsay
sandweshar
ea
hug.mul
umeThembi
nkosi
makeshi
s
wayi
n.
“
Wowy
ouar
esobeaut
if
ulmychi
l
d”
“
Thanky
oumal
ume”Hegi
vesmeat
ight
hug.Mkhul
uandGogoal
somaket
hei
r
wayi
nandcompl
i
mentme,
nowI
’
min
t
ear
sthegoodt
hingi
sIwantt
okeep
mynat
ural
fort
het
radi
ti
onal
weddi
ng
t
henl
aterIwi
l
lwearmakeupwi
tht
he
hel
pofmygl
am squad.
“
Comemydear
”mal
umesay
sashe
hookshi
sar
m onmi
ne.Wewal
koutand
t
hewomenst
art
sul
ulat
ing,
ever
yone
j
oinussi
ngi
ngasIpar
adet
heNkosi
y
ard.Thewal
kcomet
oahal
tandwhen
Il
ookupt
her
ehei
smyPr
inceChar
ming
wear
ingwi
thi
beshuwhi
chi
smadef
rom
t
hecal
fski
nont
ophegoti
sembat
hot
o
cov
erhi
sshoul
der
s.Hehasahandband
whi
chi
smadef
rom cowski
nto
compl
etet
hel
ook.Damnhel
ooksl
i
kea
Ki
ng,
myZul
uKi
ng.Ourey
esmeetand
shef
lasheshi
scont
agi
oussmi
l
e.
“
Yougoty
ourwhol
eli
feogl
i
nghi
m now
si
tdown”Sboshsay
s.Igi
ggl
esi
tont
he
gr
assmat
,looki
ngdownassi
gnof
r
espect
.Thebr
idesmai
dssi
ngasong
andst
artt
hepr
ocessofgi
vi
ngt
hegi
ft
s
t
otheNkosi
fami
l
y(umabo)Theycal
l
outt
heNkosi
fami
l
yonebyoneandt
hey
l
i
eont
hegr
assmatandt
henmom
Duducov
erst
hem wi
thbl
anket
s.Oncea
per
sonhasr
ecei
vedher
/hi
sgi
ftshe/he
si
ngsanddanceassi
gnofappr
eci
ati
on.
Idi
dn’
tknowt
heNkosi
fami
l
yist
his
hugeex
cludi
ngt
hedeceasedunt
ilIhad
t
obuyt
hesegi
ft
sfort
hem.The
r
ecei
vi
ngoft
hegi
ft
sisov
erf
inal
l
ynow
i
t’
smyt
urnt
ogi
vemyhusbandhi
sgi
ft
s.
Ay
andast
art
sasongf
ormeandIgetup
andl
ookf
ormyhusband.He’
ssi
tt
ing
downwi
thKamar
iaonhi
slap.Ipl
ace
t
hegr
assmatont
hegr
oundl
eadi
ngt
o
t
hebed.Heget
supandputKamar
ia
downt
hent
akemyhandi
ntohi
s.
“
myAf
ri
canQueeny
ouar
esobeaut
if
ul”
“
Soar
eyoumyZul
uKi
ng”Il
eadhi
m
nex
ttot
hebedandhesi
tsoni
t.
“
Youdon’
thav
etodoal
loft
hesebaby
y
ouar
epr
egnantIdon’
twantt
ost
rai
n
y
our
sel
f”
“
It
’sokaymyl
oveIgott
his”Isi
tont
he
gr
assmatnex
ttoabasi
nandwashhi
s
f
eetaf
tert
aki
ngof
fiz
inx
abul
elel
azakhe.
OnceI
’
m doneIpul
lupabedcov
ersf
or
hi
mtogeti
n.
“
Ningamshay
ikakhul
uphel
a”(
don’
thi
t
hi
m har
d)Iwhi
spert
oAy
anda,she
l
aughs
“
Ngi
zomshay
elanokut
hiwadl
ala
ngenhl
i
ziy
oyami
”(Iwi
l
lhi
thi
m har
dfor
pl
ayer
swi
thmyhear
t)Shej
okes
Lwenkosi
geti
ntobedandcov
erhi
m
wi
thaduv
et.Thebr
idesmai
dsandot
her
gi
rl
sfr
om mysi
dehi
thi
m wi
thsmal
l
st
icksandher
unsaway
.Thewomen
ul
ulat
e.
“
Nimshay
elani
ubabami
!”(
Whyar
eyou
hi
tt
ingmydaddy
!)Kamar
iascr
eams
wi
thangerandweal
lbur
sti
ntol
aught
er.
Ir
oam myey
esar
oundandi
t’
sonl
ynow
IseeGuguwi
thher“
newf
ri
end”nex
tto
t
hem t
her
e’sMpendul
owhol
ooks
j
eal
ous.
MyhusbandandIchangei
ntomat
chi
ng
seshweshweat
ti
reandpar
adear
ound
t
hey
ardwhi
l
epeopl
ear
esi
ngi
ng.The
t
radi
ti
onal
weddi
ngendswi
thsi
ngi
ng
anddanci
ngcompet
it
ionbet
weenmy
si
deandhi
ssi
de.
“
Youl
ookamaz
ingbaby
!”Guguscr
eams
“
Ithoughty
ouwer
enotcomi
ngIwas
wor
ri
ed”
“
HowIcanmi
ssy
ourbi
gday
”weshar
e
ahug
“
Muhl
ebouguyl
ohambanay
e”(
Theguy
y
ouar
ewi
thushot
)shegi
ggl
es
“
Iknow”
“
IsawMpendul
ogi
vi
ngy
ouguy
sihl
o
el
i
buhl
ungukanj
ani
”
“
Hehasnot
hingt
obej
eal
ousof
.Vuki
l
e
andIar
ejustf
ri
ends.
”
“
Yeahr
ight
”shel
aughs.Mom Zoand
mom hel
pmechangei
ntomywhi
te
weddi
nggownandt
hegl
am squaddo
myf
aceandst
ylemyweav
e.
“
Wowy
ouar
esobeaut
if
ul”-mom Zo
“
Youl
ookl
i
keaGoddessmybaby
”-
mom
“
Ngi
yabongabomamabami
”Weshar
e
agr
ouphug.Mybr
idesmai
dsar
einbaby
bl
uemer
mai
dsdr
essandt
heyl
ook
beaut
if
ulshame.Weal
lopt
edf
orf
lat
shoessi
ncewear
egoi
ngt
othebeach.
Thedr
ivet
othebeachi
sshor
t.Kamar
ia
l
eadt
hewayt
otheal
tert
hrowi
ngr
ose
pet
alswi
thThandonex
ttoherasa
peachboyt
hent
hebr
idesmai
dsf
oll
ows
wi
tht
hei
rgr
oomsmen.
“
Arey
our
eady
”mom asksasshet
akes
myhandi
ntoher
s.Inodmyheadand
wewai
tfor047t
ost
artsi
ngi
ng:

“
Dar
ly,
babe
I
'
vepr
ayedf
ory
ou
Andi
knowy
esi
know
Tot
akei
tther
e
St
handwasam
I
'
vepr
ayedf
ory
ou
Ndi
thandaz
il
e
Andi
knowy
esi
know
Wecant
akei
tther
e
Ngobakudal
asi
gudl
ami
nanawe
Naweuy
ayaz
i
St
il
lwecant
akei
tsl
ownx
akungaba
y
int
ooy
ifunay
oley
o
Wen'
ungowam ungowam ngi
thanda
wenawedwa
Akekhoomuny
eof
ananawe
Wen'
ust
handwasam
Ndi
bongaumdal
ingawengot
hando
ol
unj
e
Ngobangi
ngowakhokunaphakade
Ndi
bongaumdal
ingawengot
hando
ol
unj
e
Ngobangi
ngowakhokunaphakade
I
dlel
aongi
bambangay
o
Ondi
thandangay
o
Babendi
ngowakho
Ngobaungowam kunaphakade
Kudal
asgudl
ami
nanawe
Babendi
ngi
wakhosowecant
akei
t
sl
ownx
akungabay
int
ooy
ifunay
oley
o
Wen'
ungowam ungowam
Ndi
thandawenawedwa
Akekhoomuny
eof
ananawe
Wen'
ust
handwasam
Icoul
dn'
taskf
ormor
e
Cosbabey
ouwer
eal
lthati
needi
nmy
l
i
fe
Nowbabei
lov
eyout
il
lfor
ever
Icoul
dn'
taskf
ormor
e
Cosbabey
ouwer
eal
lthati
needi
nmy
l
i
fe
Nowbabengi
zokut
handat
il
lfor
ever
I
ntl
i
ziy
oyam ngey
akho
Ut
handol
wam ngol
wakho
Akasoz
eabekhonaof
ananawe
Nowbabei
lov
eti
l
lfor
ever
Kudal
asgudl
ami
nanawe
Naweuy
azbabe
Sowecant
akei
tsl
ownx
akungaba
y
int
ooy
ifunay
oley
o
Babe
Wen'
ungowam ungowam
Ndi
thandawenawedwa
Akekhoomuny
eof
ananawe
Wen'
ust
handwasam
Wen'
ungowam ungowam
Ndi
thandawenawedwa
Akekhoomuny
eof
ananawe
Wen'
ust
handwasam”

Ikeepmygaz
eonmyKi
ngasmom wal
k
medownt
heai
sle.Hel
ooksbr
eat
h
t
aki
ngi
nabl
ue3pi
ecesui
tsandI
tal
i
an
shoes.Wemakei
ttot
heal
tarandmom
gi
vesmet
oLwenkosi
thenr
eti
ret
oher
seatnex
ttodaddy
.
“
Youl
ookbr
eat
htaki
ngMaShwabade”
“
Thanky
oubabysoar
eyou.
”Thepast
or
sayanpeni
ngpr
ayeraf
terasi
ngi
ng
chor
usandt
ell
thecongr
egat
ionwhywe
ar
egat
her
edher
e.Tr
adi
ti
onal
l
ywe
al
readymar
ri
edsot
her
e’snousef
ort
he
par
twher
eheasksi
fther
e’sany
one
whodoesn’
twantt
oust
ogetmar
ri
ed.
Nowi
t’
sti
mef
ort
heex
changeofv
ows.
Lwenkosi
takesmyhandsi
ntohi
sand
l
ooksatme.
“
Letmet
aket
hist
imesayumuhl
e
st
handwasami
jeal
ousdown.Cel
a
ni
mbhekeni
..
.l
ookatt
hem baby
”
scr
eamsf
il
lsmyear
sandIbl
ushasI
l
ookatt
hecongr
egat
ion.
“
MaShwabawami
omuhl
e,si
mot
omot
o
sami
Ihadal
lthev
owspr
epar
edbut
y
ourbeaut
ytookmybr
eat
heawayand
nowIcan’
tev
enbegi
ntof
indt
hewor
ds
t
oconv
eymyl
ovet
oyou.Youhav
e
hei
ght
enedsuchdept
hsi
nmyhear
tand
soul
thatIcan’
tex
pressmyl
ovei
n
wor
ds.Yourl
ovel
i
ght
supmyhear
tand
gi
vesmepeacet
omysoul
.Il
ovey
ouso
muchj
ubal
ami
youar
ethebest
deci
sionIhav
emadei
nmyl
i
fe.I
pr
omi
set
obet
hebesthusbandev
er
andl
eav
enost
oneunt
urnedt
oshowmy
l
ovef
ory
ou.Thanky
ousomuchf
or
maki
ngmeamanamongmenandmy
l
i
feex
traor
dinar
ywi
thy
ourdi
vi
nel
ove.I
wi
l
llov
eyout
il
lthesun,
moonandst
ars
cont
inuest
oshi
nei
nthesky
.”Hewi
pes
myt
ear
sandki
ssesmyf
orehead.
“
It
’sy
ourt
urnnowMi
ssMt
himkhul
u”I
t
akeahugebr
eat
heandl
ookatmy
husband
“
Nkosi
Ndl
angamandl
a,Mawandl
aka
Ndl
ela,
ninabaseMandl
ovi
ni…”The
womenul
ulat
eandmenwhi
stl
es
“Idon’
tknowwher
etobegi
nnotev
ena
nov
eli
tsel
fwoul
dbeenought
oex
press
myl
ovef
ory
ou.Thedayy
ouwal
kinmy
l
i
fet
imest
opped,
ever
ythi
ngceasedt
o
ex
istandt
hewor
ldar
oundmemel
ted
andv
ani
shed.Il
ovey
oumor
ethen
any
thi
ngIhav
eev
erl
ovedi
nmyent
ir
e
l
i
fe.Youpossessmyhear
tandsoul
.My
l
ovef
ory
ougr
owsev
erysi
ngl
esecond
oft
heday
.Youl
i
vei
nthef
oldsofmy
ski
n,y
oul
i
vebeneat
hmybonesandy
ou
f
lowi
nmybl
ood.Iwantt
othanky
ou
babawabant
wanabami
foraccept
ing
meandl
ovi
ngmef
orwhoIam.Once
uponat
imeIwasabl
i
ndgi
rlbutt
hat
nev
erst
oppedy
ouf
rom l
ovi
ngme.Li
ke
anyot
herr
elat
ionshi
pwehav
ebeen
t
hroughal
otbuther
ewear
etodayand
I
’
m sopr
oudt
obest
andi
ngher
einf
ront
off
ri
endsandf
ami
l
ydecl
ari
ngmyl
ove
f
ory
ou.Icannev
erbegr
atef
ulenough
Mphaz
imawami
omuhl
efort
hel
ovey
ou
shower
ingatmeev
ery
day
.Thanky
ou
somuchf
orseei
ngmewor
thyofbei
ng
y
ourwi
feandt
hemot
herofy
our
chi
l
dren.I
’
m somadl
y,cr
azi
l
y,i
nsanel
y
i
nlov
ewi
thy
oungunaphakadel
ami
.My
soul
wil
lal
way
sst
ayi
ntr
icat
elyt
angl
ed
wi
thy
oursoul
til
ltheendoft
ime”Now
i
t’
smyt
urnt
owi
pehi
stear
s.
“
Beaut
if
ulv
ows.
..
ther
ingspl
ease”
Kamar
iabr
ingst
her
ingsf
orwar
dand
t
hepast
orbl
essest
hem t
henwe
ex
changet
her
ings.
“
NowIpr
onouncey
ouhusbandandwi
fe
y
oumayki
ssy
ourwi
fe”Hepul
l
sme
cl
oseandweki
sspassi
onat
elyast
he
cr
owder
upt
swi
thj
oy.
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Ilov
eyou”
Het
akesmyhandandwemakeourway
t
othet
endast
he047si
ngs-
ungowami
.
Justl
i
keIex
pect
edev
ery
thi
ngi
sper
fect
.
Thespeechest
akepl
aceaswedi
ne.A
manwal
ksi
nst
umbl
i
ngwi
thabot
tl
eof
whi
skeyi
nhi
shand.
“
Niy
ishadi
sakanj
ani
indodakaz
iyami
ngaphandl
ekwami
huhhh!
!.
..
Bonga!
!
Wher
ethef
ucky
ou!
!….
Iwanty
out
ell
me
howt
hehel
ldoesmydaught
erget
mar
ri
edwi
thoutme.
..
.Iam herf
ather
!
Uphi
uBonga!Zi
vez
enondi
ndwa
omkhul
u!!
..
.”I
naspl
i
tsecondDaddyi
s
gr
abbi
ngt
hemanout
sidebuthe’
s
f
ight
ingandwi
ggl
i
ng
“
Thatmydaught
er!
!Mi
rababycomet
o
daddy
!I’
myourf
ather
!.
..
eywenal
eav
e
meal
one!Iwantmydaught
er!
!she’
smy
onl
ychi
l
d,wenauz
enz
aisgor
angami
I
f
uckedBongaf
ir
standmadeher
pr
egnant
!!
”Daddyl
osti
tpuncheshi
m
t
hendr
agshi
m out
side.Mal
ume
Thembi
nkosi
fol
l
owst
hem f
ewmi
nut
es
l
atert
heywal
kin,
Dadandmal
ume.
“
Wear
esor
ryaboutt
hatpeopl
elet
’s
cont
inueandhav
efun”mal
umesay
s.I
hav
etear
sinmyey
esr
ightnow.Idon’
t
needt
obet
oldt
hatwasmyf
atherandI
can’
tbel
i
evet
hatt
hef
ir
stt
imeIsawhi
m
i
nmyl
i
feheembar
rassedmel
i
ket
hat
onmyweddi
ngday
.
“
Don’
tcr
ymybaby
”myhusbandsay
s
wi
pingmyt
ear
sandIcanseemom
l
ooki
ngatuswi
thwor
ry.If
akeasmi
l
e
andshemout
hed“
I’
m sor
ry”i
t’
snother
f
aul
t.Myhusbandhel
psmedr
inkwat
er
andl
ooksatme
“
Phephi
say
ezwa”Inodmyhead.I
’
m
gl
adt
hatt
heni
ghti
sgoi
ngwel
land
ev
ery
oneseemsl
i
ket
hatt
heyhav
e
f
orgot
tenaboutt
hati
nci
dentear
li
eron.
MyhusbandandIhav
eourf
ir
stdance
t
henev
ery
onej
oinus.
“
Youhav
ebeenanaught
ygi
rlMr
sNkosi
,
Daddyhav
etopuni
shy
ouf
orbei
ng
hor
nyf
oranot
herman”Wi
tht
hatsai
dhe
pi
cksmeupl
i
keabr
idet
hatIam and
wal
ksoutwi
thmeasev
ery
onet
hrows
r
osesonus.Happydoesn’
tbegi
nto
descr
ibehowIam r
ightnowandI
’
m
gl
adt
hatIdi
dn’
tal
l
owt
hatmancal
l
ed
myf
athert
orui
nmybi
gday
.
CHAPTER84
(
unedi
ted)

Theaudaci
tyoft
hatmant
ocomet
omy
daught
er’
sweddi
ngandi
nsul
tmei
n
f
rontofev
ery
one.Icanf
eel
tear
sof
angerbur
ningi
nmyey
es.Howdar
ehe
cal
l
smeal
lthosenamesandcl
aim my
daught
eraf
tert
hewayhet
reat
edme.I
wal
koutandt
akeawal
kal
ongt
he
beach.
“
Snookumswai
tup”Iwai
tforhi
m and
whenheget
stomehet
akesmyhand
i
ntohi
shandandwest
rol
lal
ongt
he
beachwi
thoutsay
ingawor
dtoeach
ot
herf
orawhi
l
e.
“
I’
m sor
ry”
“
Howdar
eheKhuz
ani
?Howdar
ehe
comest
omydaught
er’
sweddi
ngand
embar
rasusl
i
ket
hat
!Howdar
ehe
i
nsul
tmeandcl
aim mydaught
erwhen
he’
stheonewhochoset
othr
owmeout
i
nthest
reetpr
egnant
!Iwasonl
y23
y
ear
sKIhadnooneandIex
pect
edhi
m
t
omanuporatl
eastt
akecar
eofhi
s
chi
l
d.Wher
ewasheal
lal
ongsekaz
ofi
ka
manj
eaz
othi
mykl
otamykl
otamy
daught
erukunuka!Iwasal
lal
onewhenI
wasdeal
i
ngwi
tht
hecompl
i
cat
ionsof
t
hepr
egnancy
!Ir
aisedmydaught
er
al
onehehasnor
ightt
ocl
aim her
!”
“
Iknowmyl
ovehe’
ssi
ck.Iwi
l
lmake
sur
ethathedoesn’
tgetneary
ouorour
daught
erunt
ilhemanupandadmi
tto
hi
swr
ongs”
“
Thanky
ouf
orhandl
i
nghi
m”
“
Don’
tment
ioni
tbabyhewasoutof
l
i
ne”
“
Yazst
handwasami
Ispendy
ear
sangr
y
atmyf
atherandnowt
hatIhav
e
r
euni
tedwi
thhi
m Ihav
esomuchpeace
i
nmyhear
tandIwantt
hatf
ormy
daught
ert
ooy
ouknow,
att
heendoft
he
dayhe’
sherf
ather
.Iwi
shMf
ani
seni
can
humbl
ehi
msel
fyouknowandshow
r
emor
semay
bej
ustmay
beIcanput
ev
ery
thi
ngbehi
ndusandI
’
m sur
eMi
ra
t
oo”
“
I’
m gl
adt
haty
ouar
ewi
l
li
ngt
olethi
m
beapar
tofMi
ra’
sli
fekuwukut
hinj
e
ngat
hii
khandaal
i
that
hikahl
e.
Ungi
chomel
angokut
hihef
uckedy
ou
f
ir
standmadey
oupr
egnantwhodoes
t
hatmar
ayeh?
”Wel
augh
“
Angi
thi
phel
ahe’
sdi
ckl
essr
emember
”
“
OhshamemanbutIdon’
tcar
eifhe
f
uckedy
ouf
ir
stI
’
m happyt
haty
ouar
e
mi
neandIpl
ant
okeepy
ouf
orev
er.
”He
pul
l
smecl
oset
ohi
msel
fandweshar
e
aki
ss.Idon’
tknowwhyt
hischi
l
d
al
way
sgetex
cit
edwhenhi
sfat
herandI
makeout
.Hebr
eakst
heki
ssand
t
ouchesmyt
ummyt
ofeel
ourchi
l
d’s
l
i
ttl
eki
cks.
“
Uyaz
ithandai
zi
ntol
omt
anakho.Ipr
ay
i
t’
saboyIbet
terhav
eawhor
esont
hen
awhor
edaught
er”Hel
aughs
“
Ial
sowantaboy
,weal
readyhav
etwo
daught
ersweneedanot
hersonnow”
“
Mar
aangf
uni
afuz
ewenaay
”(Idon’
t
wanthi
mtobel
i
key
ou)
“
HawubabyI
’
m nott
hatbad”
“
Khuz
ani
youar
etoomuchy
azI
’
m
af
rai
dtobr
agaboutmymani
nfr
ontof
ot
herwomenbecauset
her
emi
ghtbea
womanwhoknowshow’
smymani
n
bed.
”
“
Ohsoushoukut
hingi
nswempu
ngal
endl
elay
okut
hiungachomangami
”I
canhearasmi
l
einhi
svoi
ce.
Ipushhi
m andf
reemy
sel
finhi
sar
ms
t
henwal
kaway
.Hef
oll
owsmeand
hol
dsmef
rom behi
nd.
“
OkayI
’
m sor
rymyl
oveIpr
omi
set
her
e’s
noot
herwomant
hatwi
l
lev
erbot
her
y
ouagai
n”Heki
ssesmyneck
“
Howdoy
ouknowt
hat
”
“
Ijustknowst
handwasami
.”
“
Tel
lmehowmanywomenhav
eyou
ev
ersl
eptwi
thi
nyourl
i
fe”
“
Doy
our
eal
l
ywantt
oknow”Heni
bbl
es
onmyear
lobecausi
ngmet
omoan
“
NoIdon’
tbutIf
eel
li
keIhav
eto
pr
epar
emy
sel
fformor
edr
ama”
“
Youhav
emywor
dmyl
ove”Het
urns
mear
oundandpul
l
smecl
oser
.
“
Ngi
yakut
handaNokubongaandIwant
t
ospendt
her
estofmyl
i
fewi
thy
ou.I
n
myheady
ouandIal
readymar
ri
edand
wehav
ebeaut
if
ulmansi
on.Icansee
ourki
dsandgr
andki
dsswi
mmi
ngi
nthe
pool
.”Imel
tinl
i
qui
dgol
d
“
AssoonasIdel
i
vert
hisbabyy
ouandI
wi
l
lgetmar
ri
ed.Iwantt
olookbeaut
if
ul
t
hiswi
l
lbemyf
ir
standl
astweddi
ng.I
don’
twantl
ookl
i
keahi
ppoi
nawhi
te
weddi
nggown.Youhav
enoi
deahow
har
ditwasf
ormet
ofi
xMi
ra’
sdr
essi
n
3day
sandi
tdi
dn’
thel
pthatt
he
mat
eri
ali
sver
yscar
ce”
“
Youdi
danamaz
ingj
obshewasso
beaut
if
ulasheav
ypr
egnantasshei
s.”
“
NehI
’
m sopr
oudofher
”
“
MinaI
’
m pr
oudofbot
hofy
ou.You
hav
ebeent
hroughal
ott
oget
herand
i
ndi
vi
dual
l
ybuty
oumadei
t.Youspend
4y
ear
sapar
tandt
her
ear
eal
otof
t
hingst
haty
out
wowentt
hrought
hat
wasmeantt
obr
eaky
oubuty
ouguy
s
f
oughtagai
nstal
lodds.Yourbondwi
th
hernowi
sst
rongert
henev
erandI
’
ma
pr
oudf
atherandhusband”Ismi
l
eand
myt
ear
sfl
owdownmyf
ace.He’
sri
ght
mydaught
erandIhav
ebeent
hrougha
l
otbutwear
est
il
lsur
viv
ingandst
ronger
t
henbef
ore.
“
Thanky
oubabymi
nangi
bongawena,
wi
thouty
ouIdon’
tknowwher
eI’
dbe
r
ightnoworhowmyr
elat
ionshi
pwi
th
mydaught
erwoul
dber
ightnow.Il
ove
y
ousososomuch”Icuphi
sfaceand
weki
ss,
deepl
yandsl
owl
y.
“
Let
’sgetoutofher
evel
ethe
newl
ywedshav
elef
tandy
ouneedt
o
r
esti
twasl
ongdayt
oday
”
“
I’
m sot
ir
edandmyf
eetar
eachi
ng.
”
“
Don’
twor
rydaddywi
l
lgi
vey
oua
massage”Het
akesmywemakeour
waybackandt
akeKamar
iaandEmi
hle
t
hendr
ivehome.

He’
ssi
tt
ingont
hesandandst
ari
ngat
t
hebeach.Imakemywayt
ohi
m we
hav
en’
ttal
kedex
ceptgr
eet
ingeach
ot
her
.Hedi
dn’
tseem l
i
kehewas
enj
oyi
ngt
heweddi
ng.
“
Suchamol
l
ify
ingambi
ance”Isay
si
tt
ingnex
ttohi
m ont
hesand
“
Yeah”Hegul
psdownhi
swhi
skey
t
hrought
hebot
tl
e
“
Howar
eyouhol
dingup”
“
I’
m st
il
lbr
eat
hing”Ther
e’ssi
l
encef
ora
br
iefmomentandI
’
m wonder
ingwhati
s
het
hinki
ngaboutbecausehe’
sseems
l
osti
nhi
sthought
s.
“
Itwasabeaut
if
ulweddi
ngi
sn’
tit
”it
wasr
eal
l
yabeaut
if
ulweddi
ngI
’
m so
happyf
ormybestf
ri
endnotev
ery
one
gett
hei
rhappi
l
yev
eraf
terespeci
all
y
wi
tht
hei
rfi
rstl
over
s.
“
Yeah”Hesay
sandgul
psdownhi
s
whi
skeyagai
n.Imadeagooddeci
sion
byl
eav
inghi
mit
scl
eart
hathe’
ssor
e
t
hathel
osthi
s“mt
wana”f
orgoodnow.
“
How’
sJoz
i”Hesay
saf
terawhi
l
e
“
It
’sgr
eatI
’
m awai
tr
essi
nsome
r
est
aur
antandMi
rai
sthebestshame.I
l
ovemyapar
tmenti
t’
sbeaut
if
ul”
“
She’
sthebesti
sn’
tshe?
”
“
Yeahshei
s.Luckyi
sthemant
hati
s
herhusbandnow”
“
Neh”Hesi
psonhi
swhi
skey
.
“
Mami
”It
urnandl
ookathi
m ashe
wal
kst
owar
dsus
“
Ihav
ebeenl
ooki
ngf
ory
ou”Igetup
f
rom t
hesandanddustt
hesandf
rom
myhandsandbut
t.
“
I’
m her
epapa”
“
Am Ii
nter
rupt
ing?
”
“
Noofcour
senotman”Soxsay
s
“
Okayl
etmehel
pyouwi
tht
hat
”Vuki
l
e
dustt
hesandof
fmybut
tandt
hel
ook
Soxi
sgi
vi
nghi
misscar
ingme.I
t’
s
pr
obabl
ythel
ookMi
rawast
alki
ngabout
andI
’
m wonder
inghowcanaper
sonbe
gr
eedyl
i
ket
hisi
fthatev
ent
her
ight
wor
dtouse.He’
sjeal
oust
hatMi
ragot
mar
ri
edandhe’
sal
soj
eal
oust
hatIhav
e
guywho’
snothi
mthatseemst
oshow
i
nter
esti
nmehai
boI
’
m st
art
ingt
othi
nk
Soxi
saconf
usedsoul
real
l
y.
“
Thanky
oupapa”
“
Pleasur
eisal
lmi
nemami
”
“
Itwasni
ceseei
ngy
ouSoxwear
e
l
eav
ing”
“
Sur
enopr
obl
em”
“
Tomor
rowI
’
m goi
ngt
ost
artatourboy
s
gr
avebef
oreIl
eav
eforJoz
i.Vuki
l
eis
goi
ngt
otakemet
her
e”Idon’
tknowwhy
am Il
ett
inghi
m knowIdon’
thav
erepor
t
t
ohi
m whenIwantt
oseemyboy
s.
“
Nopr
obl
em Gugu.Saf
etr
avel
”
“
Thanky
ou”Vuki
l
epi
cksmeupbr
idal
st
yleandwal
kawaywi
thme,
giggl
i
ng.
Vuki
l
eneh?Wher
edoIst
art
?Ohy
eson
t
hatev
eni
nghecamet
omyapar
tment
.
Hehasbeenwi
thmef
ort
hepassed
t
hreeday
sti
l
ltoday
,yesi
nmy
apar
tmentandy
eswehav
ebeen
shar
ingt
hesamebed.Hesai
dhecan’
t
l
eav
emeal
oneknowi
ngI
’
m goi
ng
t
hroughsomet
hingt
hati
sbr
eaki
ngmy
hear
tev
ent
houghhedoesn’
tknowwhat
t
hati
s.Hecal
l
edmybossandt
oldhi
mI
won’
tbeabl
etocomet
owor
kfort
he
passedt
hreeday
sbecauseI
’
m si
ckand
appar
ent
lyhei
sfr
iendswi
thmyboss.
Thoughhedoesn’
twantt
osayi
tbut
nowIseet
hatmybossgav
ehi
m my
number
.He’
ssuchagent
lemanIdon’
t
knowwhat
’sgoi
ngonbet
weenusbutI
l
ovehav
inghi
m ar
ound,
he’
ssoeasyt
o
t
alkt
o,l
aughwi
th,
andpl
aywi
th.Don’
t
askmehowdi
dwegett
o“papa”and
“
mami
”becauseIal
sodon’
tknow.

Hergi
ggl
esar
eget
ti
ngi
naudi
bleast
hey
di
sappearoutofmysi
ght
.Igul
pdown
mywhi
skeyandenj
oyt
heseabr
eez
e.I
canst
il
lheart
hei
rvowsr
ingi
ngi
nmy
ear
stheywer
esobeaut
if
ulsowast
hei
r
weddi
ng.I
’
m gr
atef
ulf
ort
odaybecause
Icamet
oar
eal
i
zat
iont
hatMi
racl
eand
Lwandl
elwenkosi
aresoul
mat
es,
minaI
wasj
ustoneoft
hei
robst
acl
est
hatt
hey
hadt
oov
ercomebutIhav
etoadmi
tthat
i
tdoesn’
thur
tanyl
ess.Idon’
tknowwhy
i
tpai
nst
hismuchbecauseIaccept
ed
l
ongt
imeagot
hatmt
wanaandIcan
nev
erbet
oget
herormay
beIwasj
ust
bl
uff
ingmy
sel
formay
behav
inga
daught
erwi
thhersomehowbr
oughta
hi
ntofhope.Mi
rahasnev
erl
ovedmeI
hav
eal
way
sbeenan“
uncl
e”t
oherand
t
hatdaywehadsexshewashur
ti
ngand
wasn’
tthi
nki
ngst
rai
ghtnonet
hel
essour
moonl
i
ghtwasconcei
vedt
hatdayandI
wi
l
lfor
everbegr
atef
ul.
“
Hey
”shesi
tsdownnex
ttomeand
t
akesmywhi
skeyt
hensi
psoni
t.
“
Yourmommadi
dn’
tteachy
out
oask”
“
Yourmommadi
dn’
tteachy
out
oshar
e”
Il
ookatherandwehav
east
ari
ng
compet
it
iont
henbur
sti
ntol
aught
er.
“
I’
m Sbongi
l
ebutIl
i
kehowmyni
ece
cal
l
smeSboshsoy
oucancal
lme
Sbosh”shest
ret
chesoutherhand
“
I’
m Mpendul
obutt
heycal
lmeSox
”
“
Kamar
ia’
sfat
herIknowy
ou”It
akeher
handandIf
eel
awav
eofel
ect
ri
cit
y
shoot
sthr
oughmeand
If
indmy
sel
flosti
nheri
ntensegaz
e.
“
Uhm”Her
etr
act
sherhandf
rom mi
ne
asi
fit
’sbur
ningandwest
ayi
nsi
l
ence
f
oramomentasshedr
inksmywhi
skey
.
“
Whyar
eyousi
tt
ingher
eal
one”
“
I’
mjustenj
oyi
ngt
heseabr
eez
e”
“
It
’scal
mingi
sn’
tit
”
“
Yeah.
..
Icanseet
hatal
mostev
ery
onei
s
gonewhyar
eyoust
il
lher
e?”shel
ooks
atmedeepi
ntheey
es
“
Whatwoul
dyousayi
fIsayt
osi
twi
th
y
ouher
e”shecat
chesmeofguar
dI
don’
tknowwhatt
osayandherdi
vi
ne
scenti
snothel
pingasi
tint
oxi
cat
ing.
“
I’
d..
ask.
.why
?ImeanI
..I
…”f
uckSox
si
ncewhendoy
oust
utt
ernow!
“
It
’sbeenal
ongbeaut
if
uldayev
ery
one
i
sti
redandt
heywantt
osl
eepsomi
na
I
m nott
her
eyet
.Ij
ustwantt
ogetdr
unk”
“
OhokayI
..uhm Isee”Icl
earmyt
hroat
“
Ihav
enev
erbeent
oabeaut
if
ul
weddi
ngl
i
ket
hisone”
“
Met
oohey
”
“
Youdi
dn’
tlookl
i
key
ouwer
eenj
oyi
ng
t
hough”shesay
saf
tersi
ppi
ngonmy
whi
skey
.Soshe’
snotgoi
nggi
veme
backmywhi
skey
?
“
Ihadal
otgoi
ngonmymi
ndbutI
twas
ni
ce”
“
Lov
einpar
adi
se”
“
Iwoul
dn’
tcal
li
tthat
”
“
Let
’ssee.
..
uhm.
..
comi
ngt
oreal
i
zat
ion
t
hati
t’
snouset
ohol
donont
olov
ethat
i
snotandwi
l
lber
eci
procat
ed”Il
ookat
hersheseemst
oknowmuchaboutme
t
henIknowabouther
.
“
Mir
aismyni
ecebutwear
ethesame
age.Wegetal
onev
erywel
lIfy
ouknow
whatImean”
“
Ohshet
ell
syouev
ery
thi
ngy
eahIknow
whaty
oumean”
“
Howy
oudof
eel
?”
“
I’
m hur
tandgr
atef
ulatt
hesamet
ime”
“
Youar
ehur
tthaty
oui
nvest
edy
our
f
eel
i
ngst
osomeonewhowasnev
erbe
y
our
stobegi
nwi
thbuty
ouar
egr
atef
ul
t
hatt
odayshegotmar
ri
edandt
hatwas
t
heonl
ythi
ngy
ouneededf
ory
out
o
comet
oreal
i
zat
iont
haty
ouandher
wer
enev
ermeantt
obet
oget
her
”
“
Whatar
eyouwoman?
”
“
Whatdoy
oumean?
”
“
Arey
oupsy
chol
ogi
st,
psy
chi
atr
istor
t
heMt
himkhul
uwomenhav
eagi
ftof
r
eadi
ngmi
nds”shechuckl
es
“
Imj
ustasoci
alwor
kerbutI
’
mfl
att
ered
t
hough”
“
Youseem l
i
key
ouar
eunder
mini
ng
y
ourcar
eer
”
“
NoI
’
m noti
t’
sjustt
hati
twasnev
ermy
f
ir
stopt
ion”
“
Iseewhatwasy
ourf
ir
stopt
ion?
”
“
Psy
chol
ogi
st”
“
Youwoul
dmakeagr
eatbeaut
if
ulsex
y
psy
chol
ogi
st”
“
Yout
hinkI
’
m sex
yandbeaut
if
ul”
“
Idon’
tthi
nk,y
ouar
esex
yand
beaut
if
ul”shesmi
l
es,
suchabeaut
if
ul
smi
l
eshehas.
“
Thanky
ou”
“
It
’smypl
easur
enowgi
vememy
whi
skeybackwomanusuphuz
awedwa
manj
e”shegi
ggl
es
“
Youar
enotagent
lemanMpendul
olet
mebehawu”
“
Nononol
ethant
ombi
”It
ryt
otakemy
bot
tl
eofwhi
skeybutshebl
ocksmy
hand.
“
Sbohgi
vemebackmywhi
skey
”she
get
sup
“
Comeandgeti
t”Igetupt
ooandr
un
af
terherassher
unsawaygi
ggl
i
ng.I
coul
dli
stent
ohergi
ggl
esev
erysecond,
t
heyar
esosweetandmel
odi
c.
“
Youwi
l
lnev
ercat
chme”
“
Ist
hatachal
l
enge?
”
“
Youar
est
il
laski
ng”Icat
chbutshe
wi
ggl
esher
sel
fonmygr
ipandt
ri
est
o
r
unawaybef
oreshef
all
sint
othewat
erI
cat
chheri
nmyar
ms.Icanf
eel
her
br
eat
hef
anni
ngmyf
aceandst
ari
ng
deepi
ntomyey
es.Ipul
lhercl
osert
o
my
sel
frest
ingmyhandsonherwai
st
t
hendr
opmyheadt
ocapt
ureherl
i
ps
i
ntomi
nesher
eci
procat
est
heki
sswi
th
mat
chedener
gy.Herl
i
psar
esof
tand
wel
comi
ng.
“
Uhm sor
ry”shesay
saf
terbr
eaki
ngt
he
ki
ss
“
NoI
’
m sor
ry”
“
Ihav
etogoher
e”sheshov
esmybot
tl
e
ofwhi
skeyi
nmyhandandr
unsaway
l
eav
ingmesmi
l
ingl
i
keani
diot
.Ihav
e
nev
erki
ssedagi
rlbef
oreandf
eel
giddy
asIam r
ightnow.

-
I
t’
swasal
ongdayandI
’
m sot
ir
edbut
I
’
mlooki
ngf
orwar
dtot
hepuni
shment
.I
f
eel
mypant
iesget
ti
ngdampj
ustbyt
he
t
houghtofhi
m pumpi
ngi
ntomehar
d
unt
ilmykneesandpussyf
eel
snumb.I
can’
trememberwhenwast
hel
astwe
hadi
troughandhar
d.He’
sgent
le
becausehedoesn’
twantt
ohur
tmeand
t
hebabybutIsof
ucki
ngmi
ssedour
aggr
essi
vesex
.Uponar
ri
val
tot
hehot
el
het
akesmet
oourr
oom.Ther
ear
e
r
osesscat
ter
edont
hef
loorandont
he
bedwr
it
tenCongr
atul
ati
onsMr&Mr
s
Nkosi
ont
hemi
ddl
eoft
hebedt
her
e’sa
t
rayofchampagneandgl
asses.
“
Youar
eful
lofsur
pri
sesMrNkosi
.Thi
s
i
samaz
ing”
“
Youar
eamaz
ingmybeaut
if
ulwi
feI
can’
tbel
i
evet
hatwear
efi
nal
l
ywi
feand
husband”
“
Wel
lbet
terbel
i
evei
tMr
”Het
akest
he
t
rayandpl
acesi
tont
hepedest
alt
hen
hel
psmet
osi
tdownont
hebed.He
cr
ouchesbef
oremeandt
akesof
fmy
shoes.Imoansof
tl
yashegi
vesmy
swol
l
enf
eetal
i
ttl
emassage.Heget
sup
andpourchampagneont
hegl
asses
t
hencomet
osi
tsnex
ttome.
“
Her
e”It
akemygl
ass
“
Tot
henewchapt
erofourl
i
vesas
husbandandwi
fe.
”Wecl
i
ckourgl
asses
andsi
ponourchampagne.
“
Ifeel
li
kej
umpi
ngont
her
oofandt
ell
ev
ery
onet
hatf
inal
l
yImar
ri
edt
hel
oveof
myl
i
fe.Mi
ray
ouar
ethebl
essi
ngIwi
l
l
al
way
scher
ish.Thanky
ousomuchmy
l
ovef
ormaki
ngmeamanamongby
seei
ngmewor
thyofbei
ngy
ourhusband,
y
ourl
i
fepar
tnerandt
hef
atherofy
our
ki
ds”ohmanImel
tinl
i
qui
dgol
d.
“
kubongami
naMphaz
imawami
omuhl
e”(
I’
mtheonewho’
sgr
atef
ul)I
dr
inkmychampagneandaskf
ort
he
second.I
t’
stast
esogoodandi
t’
s
maki
ngabi
tdi
zzyi
nagoodway
.
“
Nomyl
ovet
hischampagnei
s
al
cohol
i
c”
“
Justonegl
asspl
easemny
eni
wami
”
“
Okayone”Hepour
smeanot
hergl
ass
andIgul
pital
ldowni
nonego.Hel
ooks
atmeandshakeshi
sheadt
hent
aket
he
gl
assesandputt
hem ont
ray
.
“
Pleasehel
pmeoutoft
hisdr
ess”He
pul
l
smeupandwal
ksbehi
ndmet
o
unz
ipt
hedr
ess.If
eel
his l
i
psont
he
backofmyneckashesl
owl
ysl
i
des
downmydr
ess.I
t’
scr
umpl
esont
he
f
loorandmyhugesel
fisoutondi
spl
ay.
Het
urnsmear
oundt
ofacehi
m Idon’
t
f
eel
att
ract
iveI
’
m sohugeandmybut
t
hasst
ret
chmar
ksbuthi
sey
esar
e
bl
azi
ngwi
thl
ustanddesi
re.
“
Swi
rlf
ordaddy
”
“
I’
m ugl
yLwenkosi
”Iwhi
ne
“
Ugl
ydoy
ouknowt
hedef
ini
ti
onofugl
y
woman?Youar
esobeaut
if
ulmyl
oveso
per
fectandt
hef
actt
haty
ouar
e
car
ryi
ngmychi
l
dist
urni
ngmeonmor
e”
Hebi
teshi
sli
pseduct
ivel
yandIl
ook
downhi
sbul
gei
svi
sibl
eonhi
spant
s.
“
Nowswi
rlf
ory
ourhusband”Iswi
rlf
or
hi
m andhespanksmybut
tcausi
ngme
t
omoan.
“
Damny
ouar
esoper
fect
!”Hepi
cksme
upandgent
lypl
acesmeonbedt
henhe
t
akesof
fhi
scl
otheswhi
l
est
ari
ngatmy
pl
ayi
ngwi
thmyboobs.I
’
m sal
i
vat
ingat
t
hesi
ghtofhi
sdi
ckpoki
nghi
sbr
ief
s.
Hecr
awl
sont
opofmeandat
tackmy
l
i
ps,
weshar
esal
i
vapassi
onat
elywhi
l
e
hi
shandsar
ewonder
ingal
lov
ermy
body
.If
eel
war
mthspr
eadt
hroughme
ashepl
ant
ssof
tandgent
leki
ssesal
l
ov
ermybodygoi
ngdownt
omypal
ace.
Het
akesof
fmypant
iesandt
hrowsi
t
awayt
henspr
eadmyl
egsapar
t
ex
posi
ngmymoi
stf
olds.Hedi
pshi
s
headbet
weenmyl
egsandl
i
ckst
he
wet
nessofmycunt,
slowl
yappr
oachi
ng
mypr
otr
udi
ngcl
i
t.
“
Oohhhbaby
”Ir
unmynai
l
sonhi
shead
whi
chcauseshi
mtogr
oanandt
he
v
ibr
ati
onofhi
svoi
ceagai
nstmynun
makesmeshudder
.Het
easesmewi
th
hi
stongue,
sli
dingi
tov
ert
heopeni
ng
andt
hensl
i
ght
lypar
tmyf
oldswi
tht
he
t
ipofhi
stongue.
“
Ohhhy
essi
t’
ssogoodbaby
”Hepr
obe
hi
stongueandswi
rli
tar
oundi
nmyhol
e.
Isqueez
ethecov
erswi
tht
heot
herhand
whi
l
eti
ght
eni
ngmygr
iponhi
shead.
Thi
sisgood,sof
ucki
nggoodIdon’
t
knowi
fIshoul
dIcr
yorl
augh
“
Kumnandi
sthandwasami
ahhh”He
sl
urpmyj
uicesl
oudl
yandf
uckmewi
th
hi
stongue.Iar
chmybackashemov
es
upt
omycl
i
t,sucki
ngi
tint
ohi
smout
h
andt
henr
ubbi
ngi
twi
tht
het
ipofhi
s
t
ongue.
“
OhhhI
’
m cummi
ngbaby
!”Ishout
,
pul
l
inghi
sheadbuthest
ops.Ipr
ob
my
sel
fwi
thmyel
bowsandl
ookathi
m
“
Baby
!!
”Iscol
dathi
m hegi
vesmea
smi
l
eandcr
awl
nex
ttomet
henpul
l
sup
t
hecov
ers
“
Goodni
ghtmywi
fe”Heki
ssesmy
f
oreheadandhol
dsmecl
oset
ohi
msel
f.
Il
ookathi
mincr
edul
ousl
yasheshuthi
s
ey
es
“
Lwandl
elwenkosi
!”
“
Sleepbaby
”
“
Youcan’
tdot
hist
ome”
“
Angi
thi
wenauqhany
elel
waamany
e
amododa.
”
“
BabyI
’
m sor
rypl
easedon’
tdot
hist
o
meespeci
all
ynotonourweddi
ngni
ght
”
Hedoesn’
trepl
y
“
I’
m beggi
ngy
ouhubbyIneedt
orel
ease
pl
ease”Ist
rokehi
sdi
ckbuthehol
ds
myhand
“
Asi
l
ale”(
Let
’ssl
eep)
“
Babypl
ease”I
’
m onmyt
ear
snowandI
knowhowhehat
esi
twhenIcr
ybuthe’
s
notbar
ging.
“
Youar
esocr
uel
Lwenkosi
!”He
chuckl
esIdeci
det
oser
vicemy
sel
fI
needt
orel
easesobadbuthesl
apsmy
hand.
“
Babypl
ease”Hehol
dsmyhandsi
nto
hi
smaki
ngsur
ethatIdon’
tser
vice
my
sel
f.Ican’
tbel
i
eveher
eal
l
ydeni
ed
memyor
gasm onourweddi
ngni
ghtwe
shoul
dbehav
ingourf
ir
stsexaswi
fe
andhusbandmx
m!I
nthemi
ddl
eoft
he
ni
ghtI
’
m wokenupbyhi
m bur
ieddeep
i
ntome.Ohboyhewor
shi
pmybodyl
i
ke
t
hewor
ldi
sendi
ngwhi
sper
ingsweet
not
hing.If
indmy
sel
frepeat
ingmyv
ows
t
ohi
m andpr
omi
singheav
enandear
th.

Iopenmyey
esandIcat
chhi
m st
ari
ng
atmewhi
l
ebr
ushi
ngmyt
ummy
.Ismi
l
e
t
ohi
m andcov
ermymout
hasIy
awn
“
Goodmor
ningMr
sNkosi
”
“
Mor
ningMrNkosi
”
“
Ulal
ekanj
ani
”(Howdi
dyousl
eep)
“
Likeababyandy
ouhubbydear
est
”
“
Ial
sosl
eptwel
lmywi
fe”Heki
ssesme
causi
ngmet
omoan.
“
I’
m sur
eyouar
ehungr
yyourbr
eakf
ast
i
sready
”
“
Youhav
enoi
dea.Letmewashmy
handsandmymout
h”Ir
oll
outofbed
anddomybusi
nesst
hencomeback.He
handsmemybr
eakf
astt
her
e’sar
ose
andsmal
lboxnex
ttoi
t.
“
Thanky
oubabywhati
sthi
s?”
“
Openi
t?”Iopent
heboxandgasp,
It’
sa
di
amondneckl
acet
hathasL&M
pendant
.
“
Babyi
t’
ssobeaut
if
ulIl
ovei
t”
“
HappyBi
rt
hdaySt
handwaSami
”
“
OhmyGodIf
orgott
hanky
oubaby
”I
ki
sshi
m andhughi
m.
“
Thi
smusthav
ecosty
oual
otbabyy
ou
shoul
dn’
thav
eaf
tert
hemoneywe
al
readyspentonourweddi
ng”
“
Don’
twor
rymyl
ovet
hiswasnot
hing.
I
’
m sor
ryt
hatwecan’
tgot
oour
honey
moonsi
ncey
ouar
epr
egnantbutI
pr
omi
set
hatsoonasourboyi
sol
derI
wi
l
ltakey
out
oanypl
acey
oudesi
re”
“
Nopr
obl
em myl
oveI
’
mjusthappyt
hat
f
inal
l
yyouar
emyhusband”
“
Noweat,
yourmom summonedus”
“
What
’swr
ong”
“
Idon’
tknowbaby
”
Wef
eedeachot
herov
eral
i
ghtchatand
oncewear
edonewet
akeashower
.He
boughtusnewmat
chi
ngcl
othesandI
’
m
i
mpr
essedathowhemanagedt
oget
mysi
zesi
nceIhav
egai
nedsomuch
wei
ght
.
“
Pleasehel
pmeputonmyneckl
ace”
Oncehe’
sdonewel
eav
e.I
t’
sseemsas
i
fev
ery
onei
sher
einuncl
esKhouse
becauseIcanseet
hei
rcar
s.My
husbandl
eadsmet
othegar
dent
her
e’s
ast
ret
cht
entandt
abl
esdecor
ated
ni
cel
ywi
thmyf
avor
it
ecol
orsbl
ackand
y
ell
ow.Themomentt
heyseeust
hey
si
ngmeahappybi
rt
hdaysong.Ncooo
I
’
mint
ear
sri
ghtnowdamnt
hese
hor
mones!
“
Imi
ssed6ofy
ourbi
rt
hday
smybaby
andIwasal
way
scr
yingespeci
all
yon
t
hoseday
swonder
ingwher
eyouwer
e.
I
’
mthankf
ult
othemanabov
eandmy
manov
ert
her
ewhof
oundy
ouand
t
odaywear
ecel
ebr
ati
ngy
our24t
h
bi
rt
hday
.Iwantt
othanky
oumyMi
racl
e
f
orbei
ngt
hedaught
ert
haty
ouar
eI
coul
dn’
thav
easkedabet
terdaught
er.
I
’
m sopr
oudoft
hewomany
ouhav
e
become.Iwi
shy
oual
lthebesthappy
bi
rt
hdaymybaby
.Il
ovey
ousomuch”
mom hugsmet
ight
ly.
“
Thanky
oumama”Iwi
pehert
ear
s.
“
HappyBi
rt
hdaymommyIgoty
ou
somet
hing!
”Kamar
iascr
eamsex
cit
edl
y
“
Thanksmyangel
whatdi
dgetf
orme”
“
Iwi
l
lgi
vey
oul
ater
..
.comeandcutt
he
cake!
”Shet
akesmyhandandl
eadme
t
ofr
ontt
abl
ewher
emybi
g24cakei
s.I
cutt
hecakepert
hepr
incesscommand.
“
Thanky
ouev
ery
oneIdi
dn’
tex
pectt
his.
Yousur
elyknowhowt
omakesomeone
speci
alguy
s.Ngi
yabongakakhul
u”
scr
eamsofj
oyf
il
lst
het
ent
.Theyal
l
wi
shmehappybi
rt
hdayandgi
veme
pr
ezz
iesasi
ftheydi
dn’
tgi
vemeenough
gi
ft
sfort
heweddi
ng.Wher
eam Igoi
ng
t
oputal
lthesegi
ft
smyapar
tmenti
s
v
erysmal
l
.Gugucoul
dn’
tmakei
tbut
shegav
emom mygi
ft
.Ihav
etocal
lher
andt
hankherIwonderwher
emyphone
i
sIl
astsawi
tyest
erday
.Idon’
tknowi
f
i
t’
smebutSboshi
sav
oidi
ngme.Imake
mywayt
ohershe’
ssi
ppi
ngonherwi
ne
“
SboshSbosh”
“
Heydol
l
”
“
Arey
ougood?
”
“
Yeswhy
”
“
Youar
eav
oidi
ngmedi
dIdosomet
hing
wr
ong?
”
“
Nobabenev
er!
”Shegul
psdownher
wi
neandwal
ksout
.Somet
hingi
supso
If
oll
owherandf
indheri
ntheki
tchen.
“
Tal
ktomepl
ease”
“
Mir
apl
easedon’
that
emeI
twasa
mi
stake”she’
stal
ki
ngf
astandt
ear
sar
e
al
readyf
all
i
ngdownherf
ace.Iwal
kto
herandhol
dherhands
“
Heybr
eat
he”shebr
eat
hesi
nandout
“
Nowt
alkmet
ome”
“
Pleasedon’
that
eme”
“
Iwi
l
lnev
erhat
eyoubabysowhat
’sup”
“
Mpendul
oandIki
ssedl
astni
ght
”Okay
Iwasn’
tex
pect
ingt
hat
“
Okay
”
“
I’
m sor
ryMi
raIwasn’
tthi
nki
ng.
..
”
“
Heyheyhol
dupwhyar
eapol
ogi
zi
ng?
”
“
Iki
ssedy
ourbabydaddyMi
ra”
“
Yesmybabydaddynotmyhusband”
shel
ooksatmesur
pri
sed
“
Youser
iousl
ydon’
tmi
nd”
“
Whyshoul
dImi
nd?
”Shegi
vesmea
“
dur
h”l
ook
“
LookMpendul
oisj
ustt
hef
atherofmy
daught
ernot
hingmor
enot
hingl
ess.I
f
y
ouki
ssedorf
uckedi
t’
snoneofmy
busi
ness”
“
WowIt
houghtmay
bey
ouwi
l
lhav
ea
pr
obl
em y
ouknowt
hecodet
hatf
ami
l
y
orf
ri
endsdon’
tdat
eeachot
her
’sex
es”
“
He’
snotmyexhe’
sjustt
hef
atherof
mydaught
erandt
omeIt
hinkt
hisi
s
unf
airkwamel
emanj
engi
yekeumunt
u
engi
mthanday
obecausey
oudat
edhi
m
ay
”webot
hlaugh.
“
I’
m gl
ady
ouar
enotmad”
“
Didy
ouenj
oyt
heki
ss”
“
HaweemaaMi
rat
hatmancanki
ssI
swearIr
eachedmymi
nior
gasm!
”
“
Yougogi
rl
!”
“
Ther
e’ssomet
hingabouthi
m Mi
raand
whenweshookhandsIswearIf
eltaj
olt
ofel
ect
ri
cit
yinmybodysomet
hingI
hav
enev
erf
elti
nmyl
i
fe”
“
Wowbabesy
azIcoul
dn’
taskany
st
epmom f
ormydaught
ert
heny
ou.I
al
way
swor
ryt
hatonedayMpendul
owi
l
l
f
indawomanandshemi
ghtmi
str
eat
mydaught
er”
“
Woahsl
owdownnownoonesai
dwe
ar
einar
elat
ionshi
pitwasj
ustaki
ss”
“
Gof
ori
tbabyhemi
ghtbet
heoney
ou
wi
l
lnev
erknow”Iwi
nkatherandwal
k
t
omymom out
sidewho’
schi
l
li
ngwi
th
hersi
bli
ngs.Isi
tonherl
apandwr
apmy
ar
m ar
oundherneck
“
Thanksmommy
”
“
Forwhatbaby
”
“
Forev
ery
thi
ngy
ouar
ebestmom ev
er”I
ki
ssherl
i
ps.
“
Mir
agetof
fmywi
fehai
bo”
“
Ngi
sancel
adaddyawumekancane”
“
AyngekeMi
rauy
azi
bonaungakanani
uy
amsi
nda”
“
Ifshecancar
ryy
ourwei
ghtI
’
m not
hing
t
oher
”Ev
ery
oneshr
iekwi
thl
aught
er.
“
Car
ryhi
swei
ghtmakwenz
enj
ani
wena”
Shepi
nchesme
“
Wheny
ouar
ehav
ingni
ght
mar
es”Isay
gi
ggl
i
ng
“
Mxm sukal
aki
mi!
”
Ther
estofdaygoeswel
landI
’
m hav
ing
t
hebestbi
rt
hdayev
er.TheMwangi
’
s
t
ri
edt
omakemybi
rt
hday
sspeci
alt
he
passedy
ear
sbutIwasn’
tenj
oyi
ngt
hem
asmuchast
hisone.Iwi
l
lfor
everbe
gr
atef
ult
othem t
houghf
ort
ryi
ng.I
’
m
sadt
hatt
heycoul
dn’
ttakeaf
li
ghtand
comet
omyweddi
ngsi
ncemom Cabai
s
heav
il
ypr
egnantandshe’
sduet
his
mont
hbutt
heypr
omi
sedt
ocomeas
soonmamagi
vesbi
rt
h.

I
’
mrunni
ngupanddownl
i
keaheadl
ess
chi
ckenpr
epar
ingf
ort
hehouse
war
ming.Myhusbandboughtmea
beaut
if
ulhouseatSandhur
sti
nSandt
on
Icoul
dn’
tbehappi
er.I
t’
saf
ivebedr
oom
doubl
est
oryt
hathasf
ormal
and
i
nfor
mal
loungesanddi
ningar
eas,
two
st
udi
es,
bil
l
iar
droom andbar
,cov
ered
ent
ert
ainmentpat
iosf
lowi
ngont
o
ex
qui
sit
egar
denandpool
.Ther
e’sa
gy
m wi
thshowerandt
oil
etf
aci
l
iti
es,
ri
m
-
fl
owpool
,secl
udedex
qui
sit
egar
den,
wi
thcy
cads,
pat
hsandr
osegar
den.I
t’
s
t
ookt
hewhol
eweekf
ort
hei
nter
ior
desi
gnert
ofi
nishdecor
ati
ngmyhouse.
“
Muuj
i
zai
ntwanay
ami
ikaki
l
e”Kamar
ia
say
sasshewal
ksi
nwi
thmyboyi
nher
handsandshe’
snotev
enhol
dinghi
m
pr
obabl
y.
“
Itol
dyout
onotcar
ryhi
m whenI
’
m not
wi
thy
ouKamar
ia”shel
ovesherl
i
ttl
e
br
othersomuchshenev
erl
eav
eshi
s
si
ght
.Mpendul
oiscompl
aini
ngbecause
Kamar
iai
sal
way
swi
thherl
i
ttl
ebr
other
anddoesn’
twantt
ovi
sithi
m any
mor
e.
Hi
m andSboshar
edat
ingandt
hey
seem t
obei
nlov
e.IhopeMpendul
o’s
f
eel
i
ngst
owar
dsherar
egenui
ne.
“
I’
m abi
ggi
rlnowmommyI
m 5y
ear
s
ol
d!”Igav
ebi
rt
h2mont
hsbackon20t
h
ofMar
ch.Iwant
edsobadt
ogi
vebi
rt
h
onKamar
ia’
sbi
rt
hdayont
he28of
Mar
chnonet
hel
essI
’
m happymyboyi
s
gr
owi
nghel
ooksol
dert
henhi
sage
whi
chi
stwomont
hs.Hi
sfat
hername
hi
m Ul
i
themba.I
t’
sabeaut
if
ulname.I
t
akemysonf
rom hi
ssi
sterandhegi
ves
meawi
l
dsmi
l
e.
“
Hel
l
ofanawamama”Iki
sshi
sdr
ippi
ng
wetl
i
ps
“
Ukaki
l
emama”
“
OkayIwi
l
lchangehi
m baby
”
“
Youhav
etot
eachmehowchangehi
m
mommy
”
“
Ncooy
ousuchagoodsi
stery
az”
“
Youf
orgotbi
gmommy
..
.bi
gsi
s”I
gi
ggl
e,sheal
way
sremi
ndsmet
hat
she’
sreal
l
yenj
oyi
ngbei
ngabi
gsi
sand
I
’
m suchahappymom.Iwi
sht
heygr
ow
upcl
osel
i
ket
hisf
orev
erandnev
erl
et
any
onecomebet
weent
hem.
“
Wher
e’sy
ourf
ather
?”
“
I’
m her
ebaby
”Hesay
swal
ki
ngi
n
dust
ingof
fhi
shandsIassumehewas
busywi
thwoodsout
sidet
obr
aai
the
meat
.
“
Yoursonneedsanappychangemy
l
ove”
“
Letmewashmyhandst
hen”Hewal
ks
t
othenear
estbat
hroom t
owashhi
s
handst
hencomesback
“
Fanakababaz
i”Het
akeshi
m andt
hey
di
sappearwi
thKamar
iaont
hei
rtai
l
.I
di
dsayt
hatshedoesn’
twantl
eav
ehi
s
si
ghtIhopenex
tyearwewon’
thav
ea
pr
obl
em whenshest
art
sschool
.Ihear
t
hebuz
zshi
ttheyar
eher
ebutI
’
m not
donewi
thcooki
ngandIknowmom she
wi
l
lbecompl
aini
ngabouthunger
.Iopen
t
hegat
efort
hem anddaddydr
ivesi
n
hi
scarf
oll
owedbyBabBheki
’
scar
.Sno
andEmi
hlear
ethef
ir
stt
ojumpoutof
t
hecarandr
unst
ome.Iopenmyar
ms
f
ort
hem butt
heypushest
hei
rwayi
n
cal
l
ingf
ormyson.Theseki
ds!Ino
l
ongerex
istev
ersi
nceUl
i
thembawas
bor
n.
“
Hel
l
osi
si”atl
eastIst
il
lex
itt
oThando
“
Hel
l
omyboy
”Ipi
ckhi
m upandki
sshi
s
t
inyl
i
ps.
“
Wher
e’sKamar
ia”Theygetal
ongv
ery
wel
laf
teral
ltheyar
esameage.
“
She’
sinsi
de”Iputhi
m downandgo
gr
eetmypar
ent
s.Theol
dhagi
sal
so
her
ear
g!
“
Sani
bonani
”Theygr
eetmebackand
weshar
ehugsandki
sses.Mom i
sso
hugeshe’
sduet
hismont
handul
aka
anal
ojehov
aIf
eel
sor
ryf
ordaddy
.
“
I’
m hungr
yar
eyoudonecooki
ng?
”
Di
dn’
tIt
ell
yout
hatshewi
l
lcompl
ain
abouthunger
.Sheeat
sli
keapi
g.
“
ComeIwi
l
lmakey
ousomet
hingt
oeat
.
I
’
m notdonet
hough”
“
Wher
e’smygr
eatgr
andsonI
’
m her
eto
makesur
eifhe’
sreal
l
yaNkosi
kungaz
e
kusi
phi
ndef
uthi
”Ir
oll
myey
esandmom
pi
nchesme
“
Itol
dyounj
emamat
hathel
ooksl
i
ke
Lwandl
elwenkosi
”mom Zosay
stot
all
y
annoy
edbyhermom’
sinl
awcomment
“
Aywenaawaz
ilut
howahl
ulwaukubona
uKar
iaukut
hiakusi
yeowakwaNkosi
”
(
youknownot
hingy
ouf
ail
edt
oseet
hat
Kamar
iai
snotaNkosi
)
“
Mom pl
easedon’
tst
artwi
thy
our
nonsenseory
ouwantmet
ocal
lcabt
o
dr
ivey
oubackhome?
”BabBheki
say
s
andIseemom Zosmi
l
ingabi
t.
“
Chamt
anami
”(nomychi
l
d)
“
Good!Let
’sgeti
n”wewal
kinsi
det
he
house.Il
eadt
hem t
oli
vi
ngr
oom and
pr
epar
eteaandbi
scui
tsf
ort
hem.
“
Yourhousei
sbeaut
if
ulmybaby
”Mom
Zosay
ssheal
way
ssayt
hiswhenshe
comesher
e.
“
Thanky
oumama”
“
Idon’
twantbi
scui
tsIwantr
eal
food”
mom say
sasshesi
tsont
hehi
ghchai
r.
“
Okaymama.
”
“
Whatdoy
ouneedhel
pwi
thbaby
”mom
Zoasks
“
Thesal
adsmamaohandy
ourspeci
al
chakal
aka”
Myhusbandappear
swi
thoursonand
t
heki
dsar
efol
l
owi
ngbehi
ndhi
m
sul
ki
ng.Hegr
eet
sourmot
her
s.
“
Bay
ambangasoIwi
l
lgi
vey
oumama”
Hegi
vesmom oursonwhobeamsat
t
hesi
ghtofhergr
andson
“
ButIsai
dIwi
l
ltakehi
mfi
rstbut
i”-
Sno
“
Youar
ely
ingIsai
dfi
rst
!”-
Emi
hle
“
He’
smybr
othersoIwi
l
ltakehi
mfi
rst
!”
-
Kamar
ia
“
KodwawenaKamar
iay
ouhav
ebeen
wi
thhi
m al
lal
onggi
veot
her
sachance”
Isay
“
Aybaz
omncol
i
samamaf
uthi
uzokhal
a
kubo”(
theywi
l
lmakehi
m di
rt
yandhe
wi
l
lcr
y)wel
augh.Kamar
iai
sful
lof
dr
amashamej
eal
ousdown.
“
MommycanIt
akehi
m pl
ease”
“
Wheny
ouar
edonegi
veSno”Mom
gi
vesEmybysont
hent
heydi
sappear
wi
thhi
m.It
aket
het
rayt
othel
ounge.
Theol
dhagi
shol
dingmysonand
cal
l
ingt
heNkosi
clannames.
“
Siy
abongakot
i”sonowI
’
m not“
mfama
ndi
ni”I
’
m“kot
i”hehel
esal
ukaz
i
si
yangi
j
way
elay
azi
.Iwal
kbackt
othe
ki
tchent
ohel
pmom Zowhi
l
emom eat
s
l
astni
ghtl
eft
over
s.Byt
het
imewef
ini
sh
ev
ery
onei
sher
eandmom Zoi
sal
ready
t
ipsy
.Themenar
ebr
aai
ngmeatout
side
whi
l
ethel
adi
esar
epr
epar
ingt
odi
shup
whi
l
ehav
ingt
hei
rgl
assesofwi
ne.I
’
m
br
east
feedi
ngsoIcan’
tdr
inksoi
t’
sme
andmom whoar
enotdr
inki
ng.
“
Wher
e’sy
oursi
gni
fi
cantot
her
”Iask
Gugu
“
Out
sidewi
tht
hemal
es”
“
Thi
ngsar
egoodbet
weeny
out
wo”
“
Ver
ygoodbaby
!”I
’
m sohappyf
orher
shameandVuki
l
eist
reat
ingherl
i
kea
queen.
“
WenaSboshuphi
uMpendul
o”
“
He’
sonhi
swaybhepi
.Yourhousei
s
beaut
if
ulcanIhav
eat
ourpl
ease”
“
Ofcour
se”It
akeev
ery
onewhohas
nev
erbeenher
ebef
oref
orat
ourand
t
heycongr
atul
ateme.Icanhearher
v
oiceaswedescendi
ngt
hest
air
s.
“
Mama!
”
“
Muuj
i
za”It
hrowmy
sel
finherar
ms
“
MyGodI
’
m sohappyy
oucameI
t
houghty
ousai
d..
.”
“
Iwant
edt
osur
pri
sey
ousweet
hear
t”I
pul
lbackandl
ookathershel
ooks
gor
geous
“
Weweni
mrembosana”(
youar
eso
beaut
if
ul)
“
Asant
emt
otowangupi
ani
mzur
i”
(
Thanky
oumychi
l
dyouar
eal
so
beaut
if
ul)
“
Wapi
babanaSt
ar”(
wher
e’sdaddyand
St
ar)
“
Waoni
njenawat
uwengi
ne”(
Theyar
e
out
sidewi
thot
hermen)
“
Nduguy
angumdogo?
”(Myl
i
ttl
e
br
other
?)shegav
ebi
rt
htoababyboy
.
“
Wuuuhsaz
esaf
ayi
nangekesi
zwe
nomaseni
shl
eba”weal
lbur
sti
nto
l
aught
er
“
Youcansayt
hatagai
nAunt
yBonga”
Ay
andaadds
“
Yourbr
otheri
ssl
eepi
ngi
nyourson’
s
bedr
oom”mom Cabasay
s
“
Letmegogr
eetdaddyandSt
ar”Iwal
k
out
sideandSt
ari
stheonet
hatseesme
f
ir
st.Weshar
eahugt
henshepasses
met
odaddy
“
Youshoul
dhav
esai
dthaty
ouar
e
comi
ng”
“
Andr
uint
hesur
pri
sehel
lno”Dadsay
s
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ulboobear
”
“
Thanky
oumySt
ar”
“
Comej
oint
hel
adi
esi
nsi
de”
“
Ithi
nkt
hiswher
eIshoul
dbe”
“
Okay
”
Shecal
l
edmemont
hsbackand
apol
ogi
zesowear
ecool
.Wewai
tfor
mygr
andpar
ent
sandmal
ume
Thembi
nkosi
toar
ri
vet
henwedi
shup
andser
veev
ery
one.I
t’
shear
twar
mingt
o
seeev
ery
onegat
her
edi
nmyhouseand
hav
ingf
un.
“
Mimi
”
“
YesKhul
u?”
“
Who’
sthatboygi
rl
”
“
It
’sSt
arKhul
u.”Iex
plai
nfut
her
“
What
’shermom’
sname”
“
Gabi
sil
e”
“
Ohehh”hebr
usheshi
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rust
rat
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“
Whati
sitKhul
u”
“
Cal
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esomet
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osay
”I
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nmyl
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oom.
“
I’
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lwonder
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“
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hebaby
”
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ytoy
oungv
ulner
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.She
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ookt
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imeIsawher
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”
“
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Yesmychi
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Who’
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Overt
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ar.
“
Star
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eam
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Nononomkhul
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uy
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ather
”
“
He’
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ar”mom Cabasay
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l
ooki
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unkAy
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“
Sot
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rasl
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erends!
”I
sweary
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ev
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onei
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arand
I
’
m wonder
inghowdoesAy
andaknow
aboutt
his?

.
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.TwoYear
s
Lat
er.
..
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.
.
Pr
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ear
sandki
ssherl
i
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eakf
ast
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ir
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eel
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Babywhati
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“
Openi
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imesheopenst
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I
’
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ooki
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“
Ndul
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”
“
Sibongi
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Thi
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…”
“
Cany
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opt
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me”
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Yesbaby
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i
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ingerbef
oregi
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ngheraki
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hat
l
eav
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ngf
ormor
e.
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eyouMr
sDl
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What
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Usuz
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Ofcour
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ff
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ood
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ore
r
ushi
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othebat
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acet
het
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ont
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usht
oheri
nthe
bat
hroom.She’
sont
hef
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omi
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ngI
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dherbr
aidsandbr
ushesherback.
Onceshe’
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sick”
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est
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l
ooksatme
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ibabyi
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smustbeast
omachbug,
r
ememberwehav
ebeent
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Wedeci
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imewegetnegat
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oll
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ell
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oodi
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lher
e!”she
wal
ksoutIt
aket
hef
oodandsmel
li
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ake
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ove”
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ust
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eohboynotev
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e
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eel
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I
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orsomet
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Ican’
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ofi
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”Il
ookathi
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ou?
”
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Getwhat
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e
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Thanky
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handwasami
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e
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ust
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“
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m
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ookathi
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l
aughs
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essedal
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hi
m andher
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t
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Youar
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ouknowt
hat
?”
“
Yest
hat
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oucoul
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r
oll
myey
eshe’
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msel
fthi
s
one.
“
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l
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umpupf
rom hi
m
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essed.15mi
nut
esl
aterI
’
m
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egoodt
ogo.
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kswi
thme
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air
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ngt
othegar
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pl
acesmegent
lyont
hepassengerseat
andbuckl
esmeup
“
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ockI
’
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i
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es
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art
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r
ever
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e
i
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ivest
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ot
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ev
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ouwi
l
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hatwi
l
l
makey
our
eal
i
zewhyy
ourpr
evi
ous
r
elat
ionshi
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kedwel
lthat
’s
Vuki
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er
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ust
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o
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ngwel
l
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f
ami
l
yfor
gav
emef
orwhatIdi
dtot
hem
I
t’
swoul
d’v
ebeenhy
pocr
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ical
nott
o
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orgi
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ent
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mehowr
emor
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ult
heyar
eandhow
wi
l
li
ngt
heywer
etof
ixourr
elat
ionshi
p
anddor
ightbyme.I
’
m st
il
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oget
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ert
het
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ngbi
rt
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houghti
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l
l
somehowaf
fectmymar
ri
ageasI
’
m not
r
eadyy
ett
ohav
echi
l
drenbutmy
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sver
ysuppor
ti
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er
mi
ssmyt
her
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onsev
enwhen
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thhi
swor
kheal
way
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ormydesi
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i
sm t
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hav
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nmyl
i
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Mi
raandIar
eti
ghtl
i
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husbandandIar
esoi
nlov
e.Icanf
eel
t
hisman’
slov
erunni
ngt
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eins.Iwasbor
nforhi
m andhewas
bor
nforme.Ourl
ovest
orywaswr
it
ten
i
nthest
ars.

-
I
’
m att
hebout
iquei
nmyof
fi
cewher
eI
doal
lmydesi
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ches.Il
ook
uphe’
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ggl
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ngathi
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e
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ugst
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t
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oinst
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atv
scr
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ort
abl
ecouchi
n
myof
fi
cebecauseev
ersi
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henI
wor
kinpeace.Idon’
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etoy
ell
ever
y
nowandt
hen.“
Nkosi
ha.
ah!
”“Nkosi
don’
tdot
hat
!”Godt
hisboydr
ivesme
cr
azy
,he’
sav
erynaught
yboy
.My
mot
heri
nlawdon’
thav
eapr
obl
em t
o
l
ookaf
terhi
m whenIhav
eal
otofwor
k
t
odoshe’
sver
yfondofher
gr
andchi
l
dren.TodayIdeci
dedt
ocome
wi
thhi
m becauseIdon’
thav
emuch
wor
kandIhav
etogohomeandcook
f
ormyhusband.He’
scomi
nghome
t
odayf
rom abusi
nesst
ri
p.Myphone
r
ingsIsmi
l
easIseewho’
scal
l
ing.
“
Thabz
olo”
“
Thabz
olonj
e?”Igi
ggl
e
“
Thabz
olowami
”
“
Nowt
hatsoundsbet
terhowar
eyoumy
f
ohl
oza”
“
I’
m happymyhusbandi
scomi
nghome
andy
oumydear
esthusband”
“
I’
m al
sohappyIcan’
twai
ttoseemy
wi
feandki
ds.
”
“
Whatt
imewi
l
lyouar
ri
ve?
”
“
Around5t
o6pm”
“
Ican’
twai
tmyl
ove”
“
Wearsomet
hingsex
yforDaddy
”my
cheekst
urnv
ermi
l
li
on
“
Yourwi
shi
smycommanddaddy
”
“
Nowl
etmeconcent
rat
eondr
ivi
ng.I
l
ovey
oumysnookums”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomydaddyK”Ihangup
bl
ushi
ng.
Ihav
enev
erl
oveamanl
i
keIl
ove
Khuz
ani
.He’
snotper
fectbuthe’
s
ev
ery
thi
ngandmor
eandIwanti
naman.
Justl
i
kehepr
omi
sedt
her
e’snoot
her
womanwhoappear
edov
ert
hepastt
wo
y
ear
sandcl
aimt
ohav
eachi
l
dwi
thhi
m
orcausedr
amahowev
ert
her
ewast
his
Sci
ssormanwhogotmeoutofpr
ison,
heki
ndabecameapai
ninourbut
tsbut
Khuz
ani
pai
dhi
sdebtbyhacki
ng
compani
esandcl
eanal
lthei
rmoney
.I
al
way
spr
ayt
hatGodkeepourmar
ri
age
st
rongerev
ery
dayandnev
eral
l
ow
any
oneorany
thi
ngt
ocomebet
weenus.
Yeswegotmar
ri
edaf
ewmont
hsl
ater
af
terIgav
ebi
rt
htoourbabyboy
.Af
ter
al
lthemi
scar
ri
agesandt
hef
actt
hat
I
miny
akai
sihambi
l
elaki
miIdi
dn’
tthi
nkI
woul
dev
erhav
eanot
herchi
l
dand
somehowIaccept
edt
hatbutGodhad
anot
herpl
an.Iknewt
hatmysoni
sa
bl
essi
ngf
rom GodhenceInamedhi
m
Sphi
wey
inkosi
.Il
ovet
hatl
i
ttl
eboyi
n
f
actIl
oveal
lmychi
l
dren,
theyhav
e
gr
ownsomuch.Mi
rai
stur
ning27y
ear
s
t
hisDecember
,Emi
hlet
urned15y
ear
s
f
ewmont
hsbackandshe’
sdoi
nggr
ade,
Si
phosot
handoi
s8y
ear
sol
dandhe’
s
doi
nggr
ade3t
henSphi
wey
inkosi
is3
y
ear
sol
dandhe’
sver
ynaught
y.Mi
rai
s
doi
ngwel
ltomor
rowshe’
slaunchi
ngher
st
udi
o.Emi
hlei
saget
ti
ngt
rophi
esand
cer
ti
fi
cat
esl
eftr
ightandcent
erat
school
forbei
ngat
opst
udent
.
Si
phosot
handoi
sav
eragei
nhi
sst
udi
es
buthe’
sgoodi
nsoccert
hent
her
e’smy
l
astbor
nNkosi
who’
sgoodatbei
ng
naught
y.Isweart
hisboyi
sgoi
ngt
obe
oneoft
hosechi
l
drenwhoar
etr
oubl
e
maker
s.Iwor
ryabouthi
myazbutmy
husbandsay
sIshoul
dn’
twor
ryhe’
sjust
achi
l
d.Myphoner
ingsi
t’
sEmi
hle’
s
school
.

“
Hel
l
o”
“
Gooddayma’
am canIspeakt
oMr
s
Msi
mango?
“
Speaki
ng”
“
Ibel
i
evey
ouar
eEmi
hleMsi
mango’
s
mom ma’
am”
“
Yessi
r”
“
Youneedt
ocomet
otheschool
now
y
ourdaught
erf
aint
ed”myhear
tski
psa
bi
t
“
Issheokay
”
“
Pleasecomema’
am”
“
I’
m onmyway
”IhangupohmyGodI
wonderwhat
’sgoi
ngon.Igetup,t
ake
mycarkey
sandmyphone.
“
Nkosi
comeboy
”
“
Ha.
ah”heshakesherheadno
“
Haywenacome!
”It
akehi
m andhead
out
.
“
Pam I
’
m goi
ngt
omydaught
er’
sschool
t
hey
justcal
l
edandt
oldmet
hatshe
f
aint
ed.Thekey
stol
ockar
einmy
of
fi
ce”
“
OhMr
sM t
hat
’ssosadIhopeI
t’
s
not
hingser
ious.I
’
m sor
ry”
“
Thanky
ouby
e”Pam i
smyassi
stant
.I
buckl
emysonatt
hebackandhopi
n
t
hendr
ivet
oEmy
’sschool
.Mymi
ndi
s
r
aci
ngI
’
m wonder
ingwhat
’shappeni
ngI
r
eal
l
yhopei
t’
snot
hingmaj
or.Upon
ar
ri
val
Ital
ktot
hecl
erkt
henI
’
m usher
ed
t
othesi
ckr
oom.Theschool
nur
sei
s
ex
ami
ningherandaski
ngherf
ew
quest
ionswhi
l
ehercl
asst
eacherand
herbestf
ri
endar
est
andi
ngt
her
e.
“
Greet
ings”
“
MrsMsi
mangohi
.Thanksf
orcomi
ng”
say
shercl
asst
eacher
“
What
’swr
ongwi
thher
?”Iaskl
ooki
ngat
t
henur
se.
“
Shef
aint
edpr
obabl
ythecausemustbe
t
hishotweat
herhowev
erIwi
l
lsuggest
y
out
otakehert
othedoct
ort
odosome
t
est
sjustt
obesur
e”
“
Okay
..
.babyhowar
eyou”
“
I’
m okaymom”
“
CanIgowi
thhernow”
“
Ofcour
seMr
sMsi
mango”Ihel
pmy
daught
ersi
tupandputonhershoes
“
Wher
e’sherschool
bag?
”
“
Iwi
l
lgof
etchi
tMr
sMsi
mango”say
s
Zet
hembe,
Emi
hle’
sbestf
ri
endand
wal
ksout
.Wegot
othedeput
yhead
of
fi
cewher
eIsi
gnedt
hel
eav
efor
m
af
tert
hatweheadt
othepar
kingl
ot.
Zet
hembegi
vesmet
hebackpackandI
puti
ttheboot
.
“
Pleasebeokayf
orme”Emi
hlenods
andhugsherbestasIbuckl
eupNkosi
.
Emi
hleget
sinnex
ttoherbr
otherand
cl
osest
hedoor
.Ist
artt
hecaranddr
ive
of
f.
“
Idon’
twantt
ogot
othedoct
ormommy
I
’
mfi
ne”
“
Butt
henur
se…”
“
Iknowwhatt
henur
sesai
dbuti
t’
s
not
hingr
eal
l
y”
“
Iwantt
obesur
eEmi
hle…”
“
Isai
dI’
mfi
neawuz
way
ini
!!
”shey
ell
sat
me.
“
Ngi
zokukhahl
elamasuny
a!”
“
I’
m sor
rymommyIdi
dn’
tmeant
oyel
l
butdon’
tfor
cemet
ogot
othedoct
or.I
wi
l
lbef
ineIj
ustwantt
osl
eep”Ikeep
gl
anci
ngatheri
nther
earmi
rr
orIcan
t
ell
somet
hingi
sgoi
ngonwi
thherand
i
t’
sli
keshedoesn’
twantt
ogot
othe
doct
orbecauseshedoesn’
twantmet
o
f
indoutwhyshef
aint
ed.Ther
estoft
he
dr
ivei
ssi
l
ence.It
akeoutmyr
emot
e
andopent
hegat
ethendr
ivei
n.She’
s
t
hef
ir
stt
ost
epoutoft
hecarandski
p
i
nsi
det
hehouse.Iunbuckl
eNkosi
and
wal
kinsi
dewi
thhi
m onmyhi
pand
Emi
’
sbackpackont
heot
herhand.He
wi
ggl
eshi
msel
fdownt
hemomentwe
geti
nsi
det
hehouseanddi
sappear
sout
ofmysi
ght
“
Kaz
euy
ogangangani
!”Isi
ghandwal
k
upst
air
stoEmi
hle’
sbedr
oom.Hubby
dear
estboughtmeabeaut
if
ulmansi
on
i
twasmybi
rt
hdaypr
esentandt
hebest
pr
esentev
er.Iknockandsheshout
son
t
heot
herr
oom
“
Comei
n”
“
Her
e’sy
ourbag”
“
Thanky
ou”Iputi
tonherdeskbyt
he
cor
nerandgosi
tonherbed
“
Babyi
fyoudon’
ttal
ktomet
henhow
wi
l
lIhel
pyou”
“
Idon’
tneedhel
pmom Ij
ustwantt
o
sl
eep”Il
ookather
“
Arey
oupr
egnant
?”
“
What
?”
“
Youhear
dme”
“
Nomom I
’
m notpr
egnant
!”
“
Thenwhyy
oudon’
twantt
ogot
othe
doct
ori
t’
sli
key
ouar
escar
edt
hedoct
or
wi
l
ltel
lmewhyy
ouf
aint
ed”
“
Mom comeonIdon’
twantt
ogot
othe
doct
orbecausei
t’
swi
l
lbeawast
eof
t
ime”
“
Thenwhati
sit
?”
“
Not
hingmamacanIsl
eeppl
ease”I
si
ghandki
ssherf
orehead
“
Ilov
eyou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oomommy
”Igetupand
wal
koutwi
thaheav
yhear
t.Somet
hing
i
sgoi
ngonandIcanf
eel
it.Ihat
eit
whenshe’
snott
alki
ngt
ome.Lor
d
knowshowIt
ryt
obeacool
mom t
o
t
hesechi
l
drenbecauseIwantt
hem t
o
f
indi
teasyt
oconf
idei
nme.Isear
chf
or
Nkosi
andf
indhi
m busydoi
ngwhatGod
knowswhatwi
thThando’
spl
ayst
ati
on.
“
Wenz
ani
!Thandowi
l
lbeaty
ouup!
”
“
Asabi
minauThando!
”Ichuckl
e
“
Don’
tyouwantt
osl
eep”
“
Nop!
”
“
Cany
ourf
athergether
eal
readyngoba
y
enauy
akona!
”
“
Daddyuphi
?”
“
He’
scomi
ng,
woz
alet
sgohav
eyour
cheesecake”Her
unst
omeIpi
ckhi
m
upandgodownst
air
s.Ipl
acehi
m ont
he
count
erandgi
vehi
m hi
scheesecake
t
hengetst
art
edwi
thpot
s.
Iheart
hando’
str
anspor
thoot
ingont
he
gat
ethenf
ewsecondsl
aterhewal
ksi
n.
“
Hel
l
omamz
o!”Nkosi
beamsathi
s
br
other
,theygetal
ongv
erywel
l
.Thando
dr
opsdownhi
sschool
bagont
hef
loor
andwal
kst
ohi
sli
tt
lebr
other
“
Sur
ent
wana”Hebumpsf
istwi
thNkosi
.
“
Daddyi
sbackmom r
ight
?”
“
Siphosot
handoMsi
mangopi
ckupy
our
school
bag!
!”
“
Oops”Hewal
kst
othedoorandpi
cks
uphi
sschool
bag.Idon’
tknowhow
manyt
imesdoIhav
etot
ell
himt
ost
op
dr
oppi
nghi
sbackpackatt
hedoorev
ery
t
imehecomesbackf
rom school
he
nev
erl
i
stens.
“
I’
m sor
rymommy
”
“
YourDaddyi
snotbacky
etbuthe’
son
t
heway
.Gochangewhi
l
eIdi
shupf
or
y
ou”Het
akesNkosi
andwal
ksaway
wi
thhi
m.Imakef
oodf
orhi
m andhe
comesbackaf
terawhi
l
ewi
thhi
s
br
otherandt
akeshi
sfoodt
he
di
sappear
stot
hel
ounge.If
ini
sh
cooki
ngmyhusband’
sfav
ori
teat
5:
30pm andhear
ri
vesat6pm.
“
HoneyI
’
m home!
”Ij
umpt
ohi
sar
ms
andhecat
chesmeandhol
dsmef
or
dearl
i
febef
oregi
vi
ngmeabr
eat
h
t
aki
ngki
ss.
“
Hel
l
omyj
aan”
“
Hey
”Iwhi
spert
ryi
ngt
ocat
chmybr
eat
h
f
rom t
hatheat
edki
ss.
“
Dadddy
!”Theboy
sscr
eamsast
heyr
un
t
othei
rfat
her
.Hepi
ckst
hem upbot
h
andt
heybot
honeachar
m.
“
Wemi
ssy
oudaddy
”
“
Imi
ssy
out
oomyboy
s”Heki
ssest
hei
r
f
oreheads
“
Wher
e’smydaught
er”
“
Uum she’
supst
air
s.Boy
sgot
othe
l
oungedaddyi
scomi
ng”Heput
sthem
downandt
heyr
unaway
.
“
What
’swr
ongmyj
aan”Hecar
essesmy
cheekandt
hewor
ryi
nhi
svoi
cet
ri
gger
s
t
ear
s.
“
Tal
ktomepl
ease”Iex
plai
ntohi
m what
happened
“
Shedoesn’
twantt
otal
ktomebaby
andIcanseet
hatshe’
sgoi
ngt
hrough
somet
hing.Doy
out
hinkI
’
mtoohar
sht
o
hert
hatwhyshe’
sscar
edofmeor
may
beI
’
m doi
ngex
act
lywhatIwas
doi
ngt
oMi
raandshe….
”
“
Heyheysl
owdown”Hecupsmyf
ace
andl
ooksatmei
ntheey
es
“
Youar
ethebestmom ourchi
l
dren
coul
dev
eraskf
orst
handwasami
.
Emi
hlei
sgoi
ngt
hroughsomet
hingand
wewi
l
lgett
othebot
tom ofi
t.Don’
tev
er
bl
amey
our
sel
fforany
thi
ngt
hat
happenst
oourchi
l
dren.Wear
edoi
ng
t
hebestwecant
ogi
vet
hem t
hebest
l
i
fet
heydeser
vebutwemustaccept
t
hatatsomepoi
ntt
heygoi
ngt
ogo
t
hrought
hings,t
hat
’spar
tofl
i
feand
t
hat
’showt
heygr
ow.Thi
nanj
east
hei
r
par
ent
swehav
etobet
her
efort
hem
andsuppor
tthem.Ev
ery
thi
ngi
sgoi
ngt
o
beokay
.Mi
rawi
l
ltal
ktohert
heyar
e
v
erycl
osesoonwewi
l
lknowwhat
wr
onganddeal
wit
hity
ezwa.
”Inodwi
th
myheadandhewi
pesmyt
ear
swi
thhi
s
t
humbst
henpul
l
smet
ohi
sar
ms.He
al
way
sknowshowt
omakemef
eel
bet
terwi
thoutt
ryi
nghar
d.
-

“
Keepgoi
ng.
..
10
mor
e..
.9.
.8.
.7.
.6.
.5.
.4.
.3.
.2.
.1”Igr
oan
t
ryi
ngt
ocat
chmybr
eat
h“whuuh!That
wi
l
lbeal
lfort
oday
’swor
koutdon’
t
f
orgett
ost
ret
chy
ourmuscl
esaf
ter
wor
kout
s.Il
ovey
ouguy
sst
aybl
essed!
”
Iwal
ktomyi
Padst
opr
ecor
dingt
hen
postmyv
ideooni
nst
agr
am.Waki
ngup
ev
ery
dayf
ormymor
ningwor
kout
shas
becomemyl
i
fe.Peopl
ehav
ebeen
aski
ngwhat
’smysecr
et,
howdoIkeep
mybodyf
itandsex
yyetIhav
e3ki
ds.
I
t’
snot
hingr
eal
l
yex
ceptex
erci
singand
eat
ingheal
thysoIdeci
dedt
oshar
e
whatwor
ksf
ormeandposti
ton
i
nst
agr
am.Ihav
ebeenr
ecei
vi
ngDM’
s
myt
ipsar
ewor
kingf
ort
hem I
’
m gl
ad
t
hatIcoul
dhel
p.

OnceI
’
m donest
ret
chi
ngmymuscl
esI
ski
ptot
heshowerandt
akeaqui
ck
shower
.honey
mooni
sgoi
ngt
owakeup
anymomentf
rom nowandwanther
f
ood.If
ini
shmyhy
giener
out
ineandsl
i
p
i
ntomyhusband’
st-
shi
rtandf
lopsaf
ter
moi
stur
izi
ngmybody
.Iwal
ktot
he
nur
ser
yroom butt
hecoti
sempt
ysoI
makemywaydownst
air
sandIcanhear
musi
cpl
ayi
ngl
oudl
y.Thi
schi
l
dbet
ter
nothav
emydaught
eri
nther
ewhi
l
e
pl
ayi
ngt
hismusi
cofher
sloudl
y!Ir
ush
t
othel
oungeandt
her
eshei
stwer
king
herl
i
ttl
eassi
nfr
ontoft
heTVwhi
l
emy
daught
eri
scr
yingont
hef
loorandmy
soni
str
yingt
ocal
m her
.Igr
abt
he
r
emot
eandswi
tchof
fthet
v.

“
Whatt
hehel
lar
eyoudoi
ng!
!”she
j
umpsupwi
thshockshedi
dn’
tseeme
maki
ngmywayi
n
“
Yourl
i
ttl
esi
steri
scr
yingandy
oubusy
danci
ngy
ourl
i
ttl
eass!Youknowv
ery
wel
lthatshe’
sscar
edofl
oudmusi
c!!
”
“
Itwasn’
tthatl
oudt
houghmommy
”
“
Ihear
dital
lthewayf
rom mybedr
oom!
!
Can’
tyouseet
hatshe’
scr
ying!
!”
“
Uyat
etemau-
Aza”Icantbel
i
evet
his
chi
l
d!Sheknowsv
erywel
lthatherl
i
ttl
e
si
steri
sscar
edofl
oudmusi
candwhat
makesmemor
eangr
yist
hatshe’
sbusy
danci
ngwhi
l
emydaught
eri
scr
ying.
“
Woz
alawena!
!”shet
ri
est
orunaway
butIgr
abherhandt
akeof
fmyf
li
pfl
op
“
I’
m sor
rymommypl
easef
orgi
veme”I
hav
en’
tdoneany
thi
ngbutshe’
scr
ying
al
ready
.
“
Howmanyt
imesdoIhav
etot
ell
you
t
hatAz
aisy
ourl
i
ttl
esi
stery
ouhav
eto
l
oveherl
i
key
oul
ovey
ourl
i
ttl
ebr
other
!!
”
Ibeatherupwi
thmyf
li
pfl
op
“
Awheeey
hoooI
’
m sor
rymama!
”Ihav
e
beenv
erypat
ientwi
thKamar
iai
t’
sti
meI
beatt
heat
ti
tudeoutofher
.I’
mti
redof
herhat
ingonherl
i
ttl
esi
sterj
ust
becausePr
incessKamar
iashoul
dbe
t
heonl
y“pr
incess”onl
ypr
incessmyf
oot
!
“
Youar
eherol
dersi
sterwhet
hery
ou
l
i
kei
tornot
!!She’
syouronl
yli
tt
lesi
ster
y
oushoul
dbepr
otect
ingherandl
ovi
ng
herl
i
key
oudot
oyourbr
other
!”she’
s
wi
ggl
i
ngandt
ryi
ngt
obl
ockt
hef
li
pfl
op
f
rom r
eachi
ngherbodybutI
’
m not
hav
ingmer
cyonher
.Thi
siswhatshe
want
edmet
odof
orhert
oli
stent
omeI
hav
ebeenbeggi
ngherev
ersi
nceher
l
i
ttl
esi
sterwasbor
ntol
oveherl
i
keshe
l
ovesherbr
otherandt
ell
i
nghert
hat
not
hingchangedt
heyar
ebot
hmy
pr
incessesandIl
ovet
hem bot
hbut
Pr
incessKamar
iai
sbei
ngdr
amat
icas
al
way
s.Si
bli
ngr
ival
ryst
art
swi
thsmal
l
t
hingsatt
het
enderage.Ihav
etost
op
t
hisshi
tnowbef
orei
t’
sescal
atest
o
somet
hinghugeandser
ious.Byt
he
t
imeI
’
m donebeat
ingherupt
hef
loori
s
wetwi
thherpee.
“
Cleant
hismessont
hef
loorandwhen
y
oudonegohav
eabat
h!!
”she
di
sappear
s.Il
ookatmysonont
hef
loor
wi
pinghi
sli
tt
lesi
ster
’st
ear
swhoi
s
r
aisi
ngherl
i
ttl
ehandsupf
ormet
otake
her
.
“
Comet
omommymyhoney
moon”she
cr
awl
stowar
dsmeandIpi
ckherup
t
henwi
pehert
ear
s
“
Aski
esy
ezwa”shebur
iesherheadon
myneck.

Wecal
lherhoney
moonbecauseshe
wasconcei
vedonourhoney
moonbutI
namedherAz
alondwe.Wewentt
oPar
is
andwewer
ether
efort
womont
hs.Iwas
soangr
yatmyhusbandwhenwe
di
scov
eredt
hatIwaspr
egnant
.Don’
t
askmehowwashi
sfaul
t,t
hathowi
tis
weal
way
slookf
orsomeonet
obl
ame.I
want
edUl
i
thembat
obe4y
ear
satl
east
l
i
keKamar
iat
henhav
eanot
herchi
l
d
nonet
hel
essI
’
m ahappymom.
“
Comeboy
”Heget
supf
rom t
hef
loor
andIpi
ckhi
m upt
oowi
thmyot
herhand
andwal
ktot
heki
tchen.Ipl
acehi
m on
t
hecount
erandki
sshi
sfor
ehead.
“
Didy
oueatmyboy
?”
“
Yes.
.mommy
..Kam.
.Kam ma.
.mademe
cor
n..
cor
nfl
akes!
”Hest
utt
ers,
atf
ir
stI
t
houghthewasst
il
lababyhencet
he
st
utt
eri
ngbutIhav
ereal
i
zedt
hemor
e
hegr
owst
hathei
sst
utt
eri
ng.He’
s3
y
ear
sol
dnowandv
erysmar
tforhi
sage.
Igi
vehi
m hi
syogur
tandat
easpoon
“
Than.
.ky
ou.
.mommy
.”Az
aisf
iddl
i
ng
hert
inyhandsonmybr
eastandcr
ying.I
si
tont
hehi
ghchai
rbef
oreLi
themba
andbr
east
feedmydaught
er.
“
Mommy
..
daddyabuy
a”
“
Yessoonf
anoz
”
“
Imi
ss.
.hi
m..so.
.much!
”He’
sver
yfond
wi
thhi
sfat
hert
henhei
swi
thme.Il
ove
t
hebondmyhusbandhaswi
thour
chi
l
dreni
t’
ssobeaut
if
ul.Imi
ssedhi
m
somuchhe’
sinUSAshoot
ingamov
ie
wi
thI
ceCube.Hewasboundt
ogot
o
USAandshowt
hem whathe’
smadeof
atsomepoi
ntsoI
’
m pr
oudofhi
m.When
hegott
hisgi
gourdaught
erwas3
mont
hsol
dandhedi
dn’
twantt
oleav
e
meal
onebutIputmyf
ootdown.I
coul
dn’
tlethi
m mi
sst
hisoppor
tuni
ty
agai
n.I
t’
shasn’
tbeeneasywi
thouthi
mI
won’
tli
ebutI
’
m copi
ng.If
eel
sobad
t
hathewon’
tbeher
efort
hel
aunchof
myst
udi
otoni
ghtbutwor
kiswor
k.I
coul
ddowi
thsomequi
cki
ethought
o
easemyner
vesabi
tbef
oreIgot
omy
st
udi
olaunch.Don’
tlookatmel
i
ket
hat
i
t’
sbeenmont
hswi
thoutt
hatdi
ckandI
don’
tknowhowdi
dIsur
viv
eal
lthese
mont
hs.Phel
athatdi
cki
smyf
ood
whenI
’
m hungr
y,mywat
erwhenI
’
m
t
hir
sty
,myr
emedywhenI
’
m si
ck,
my
sol
acewhenI
’
m br
oken,
mycel
ebr
ator
y
t
ool
whenI
’
m cel
ebr
ati
ngy
eyt
hatdi
cki
s
myaddi
cti
onandev
ery
thi
ng!Kamar
ia
wal
ksi
nwi
thmyr
ingi
ngphone.
“
Whoi
sit
?”
“
It
’sDr
agonGr
anny
”It
akemyphone
andanswerher
“
Mommy
”
“
Heybabyhowar
eyou”
“
I’
m okayandy
ou?
”
“
I’
m okaysi
sbuty
ourl
i
ttl
esi
ster
col
l
apsedatschool
yest
erday
”
“
Whathappened?
”
“
Wewi
l
ltal
kwhenwear
ri
vebutIwant
y
out
otal
ktoherst
handwasami
she’
s
mor
eopent
oyout
henme”
“
Okaymamashe’
sokaynow?
”
“
Yesshe’
sokaybutIdon’
tknowwhat
goesonhermi
ndandshe’
snott
alki
ng
t
omeorherf
ather
”
“
Pleasegether
eear
lysot
hatIcant
alk
t
oherbef
oreweheadt
othel
aunch”
“
Okayst
handwasami
.Howar
emy
gr
andki
ds”
“
Theyar
eokaymom ngi
qedakushay
a
uKamar
ia”
“
Whywoul
dyoudot
hatMi
ra”
“
She’
shast
oomuchat
ti
tudemamaand
shest
il
ldoesn’
tli
kehoney
moon”
“
Buty
oudi
dn’
thav
etobeatherupy
ou
shoul
dhav
efoundawayt
otomakeher
seewhatshe’
sdoi
ngi
swr
ong”
“
Ihav
ebeendoi
ngt
hatev
ersi
nce
honey
moonwasbor
n”
“
Okaysi
sIhopeshewi
l
lst
opt
hisi
t’
s
r
eal
l
ynotni
ce”
“
Ihopesot
oomama.
”
“
Ihav
etogoIl
ovey
ou”
“
Ilov
eyout
oo”Ihangup.
Mypar
ent
sandpar
ent
sinl
awar
e
comi
ngf
ort
hel
aunch.I
’
m gl
adt
heywi
l
l
bet
her
ethoughi
t’
swoul
dn’
tbet
he
samewi
thoutmyhusbandbutheyIwi
l
l
best
rong.Iputmyphoneoncount
er
andl
ookatmydaught
erwho’
ssucki
ng
atmyni
ppl
efordearl
i
fewhi
l
epl
ayi
ng
wi
thhert
inyf
oot
.
“
Mommy
..put
..me.
.down”Ul
i
themba
say
s
Igetupandputhi
m downt
henhe
di
sappear
spr
obabl
ytowat
cht
v.He
spendsmostofhi
sti
mei
nfr
ontoft
v
wat
chi
ngcar
toonsheev
enknowwhi
ch
channel
towat
ch.

Mybabyi
sful
lnowsoIpr
epar
e
br
eakf
astf
ormy
sel
fandl
ethercr
awl
ar
ound.I
’
m donewi
thbr
eakf
astnowI
needt
opr
epar
etheguestr
oomsf
ormy
par
ent
sandmypar
ent
sinl
awbutIst
art
bycal
l
ingLeeandf
indouthow’
sthe
pr
epar
ati
ongoi
ngon.
“
Heybaby
”
“
Heyhow’
sev
ery
thi
ng”
“
Starst
opi
tmaan!
”shesay
sgi
ggl
i
ng.I
r
oll
myey
es.Ther
e’snot
hingshewi
l
ldo
whi
l
eSt
ari
sther
e.
“
Lee!
”
“
Yesbabeev
ery
thi
ngi
sgoi
ngwel
l
”
“
Itr
usty
ouLeepl
easedon’
tletme
down”
“
Igoty
oubaby
”
“
Giv
emyauntt
hephone”Ihearsome
shuf
fl
ing
“
Boobear
”
“
Starst
opi
nter
rupt
ingLeebat
hong
uf
unani
laphov
ele”
“
Hai
bocan’
tIseemywomannow”
“
Notwhenshe’
sbusyIknowy
out
wo
f
uckev
erysecondy
ouget
!”shel
aughs
“
Iwon’
tdi
stur
bherIpr
omi
se”
“
Pleasedon’
tlookIhav
etogoIwi
l
lsee
y
out
hisev
eni
ng”
“
Okayshar
p”
I
t’
sbeenmont
hssi
ncet
heyst
art
ed
dat
ingandt
hey
’real
way
sov
ereachi
t’
s
cut
ebutannoy
ingi
fyouaskme.St
il
l
t
odayIdon’
tknowhowdi
dAy
anda
f
oundoutmeandSt
arbutshe
apol
ogi
zedandbl
amedi
tont
heal
cohol
.
Akekhonj
eowal
okhuesi
rasel
awel
l
ex
ceptmom,
shedi
dn’
tmakenoi
se
act
ual
l
ybutshewascur
iousandwant
ed
t
oknowi
fI’
m bi
sex
ual
.Shecoul
dn’
thi
de
howr
eli
evedshewasaf
terIt
oldherher
t
het
rut
h.It
hinkshe’
shomophobi
cbut
she’
sdoi
ngaper
fectj
obathi
dingi
t.On
t
hatdaywer
ecei
vednewst
hat
Mf
ani
seni
diedduet
oal
cohol
poi
soni
ng.
Idon’
tknowi
fI’
m cr
uel
buthi
sdeat
h
di
dn’
taf
fectmenotev
enabi
t.I
twas
l
i
ket
heper
sonwhodi
edwasast
ranger
wel
lhewasast
ranger
.Iwentt
ohi
s
f
uner
alt
houghj
ustf
orcl
osur
e-ny
ana.
“
Aza!
”Ical
loutf
ormydaught
erasI
sear
chf
orherev
ersi
nceshest
art
ed
cr
awl
i
ngi
t’
sbecomesami
ssi
ont
ofi
nd
herandy
ouhav
etobepr
epar
edt
hat
wher
eshei
sshe’
supt
onogood.I
r
emembert
hisot
herdayIf
oundheri
n
t
hecupboar
dsmear
ingherdanoneal
l
ov
ert
hecupboar
dluckyt
hecupboar
d
wasempt
y.
“
Honey
moon!
!”Iwal
ktot
hel
ounget
o
askLi
thembabuthe’
sal
sonott
her
e.I
heargi
ggl
i
ngsasIappr
oacht
hepl
ay
r
oom myhear
tmel
tsatt
hesi
ghtofmy
ki
dspl
ayi
ngt
oget
her
.Yest
hatwhatI
’
m
t
alki
ngabout
!Iwal
kupst
air
sandt
o
pr
epar
ether
oomsonceI
’
m doneIbat
h
Az
awhi
l
eKamar
iabat
hsherl
i
ttl
e
br
other
.
“
MommyI
’
m sor
ry”
“
It
’sokaymybabyIhopey
ouwi
l
lst
op
mi
str
eat
ingy
ourl
i
ttl
esi
ster
.Ir
eal
l
ydon’
t
l
i
kewhaty
ouar
edoi
ngi
t’
shur
ti
ngme
andwhenI
’
m hur
tmyhear
twi
l
lst
op
beat
ingt
henIwi
l
ldi
e.”I
’
mtr
yingt
o
scar
eher
.
“
Idon’
twanty
out
odi
emommy
”she
say
swi
thacr
yingv
oice.Idi
scov
eredI
hav
ehear
tissuesbuti
t’
snot
hingIcan’
t
managesowhenIwashospi
tal
i
zed
Kamar
iawasn’
ttaki
ngi
twel
l
.
“
Iwon’
tdi
ebabyi
fonl
yyoupr
omi
set
o
l
ovey
ourl
i
ttl
esi
ster
,takecar
eofher
l
i
key
oudot
oyourbr
other
”
“
I’
m sor
rymommyIpr
omi
set
olov
eher
l
i
keIl
oveLi
themba.
”shedr
awsacr
oss
onherhear
t.
“
I’
m happyt
oheart
hatbaby
.Il
ovey
ou
andy
oursi
bli
ngsequal
l
ynot
hingwi
l
l
changet
hatokay
”shenodswi
thher
head,
Iwi
pehert
ear
s.
“
Youdi
dn’
tshowmey
ourhomewor
k
y
est
erday
”
“
Idon’
thav
eonemommy
”she’
s8y
ear
s
ol
dnowanddoi
nggr
ade3,
suchabr
ight
l
i
ttl
egi
rlshei
s.Sheat
tendsbal
l
etdance
cl
assesatschool
andshewon3t
imes.
I
’
m apr
oudmom shame.

Ti
mei
s1pm nowandIhav
en’
trecei
ved
acal
lfr
om myhusbandandheusual
l
y
hecal
l
sar
ound10am.I
’
m sur
ehe
hasn’
tgott
imet
ocal
lus.I
’
mjust
chi
l
li
ngwi
thmyki
dsandwear
eeat
ing
pi
zzawhenIhearabuz
zer
.It
’smustbe
t
hepar
ent
sIr
unt
omybedr
oom and
changei
ntosomet
hingdecent
r
ememberIwaswear
ingonl
ymy
husband’
st-
shi
rtandmyt
highswer
eal
l
outondi
spl
ay.WhenIf
ini
shIr
ush
downst
air
sandopent
hegat
e.I
t’
sthem
i
ndeedIr
unt
othem andt
hrowmy
sel
fin
mymom’
sar
ms.Nomat
terhowol
dI
cangetandhowmanyki
dsIcanhav
eI
wi
l
lnev
erst
opbei
ngamommy
’sgi
rl
.
“
Hel
l
obaby
”webr
eakt
hehugandshe
pl
ant
sapeckonmyl
i
ps
“
Youl
ookgor
geous”
“
I’
m wear
ingoneofmyowndesi
gns”
shet
wir
lsf
orme,
sher
eal
l
ylooks
beaut
if
ul.
“
Keepsl
ayi
ngy
ousex
ymomma!
”she
gi
ggl
esasIwal
ktodaddy
.
“
Maf
ungwase”Ihughi
m andshewhi
sks
meof
fthegr
oundt
henput
smedown
“
Howar
eyouDaddy
”
“
I’
m okaymybabyandy
ou”
“
I’
m al
sof
inedaddydear
est
.”Iwal
kto
mom Zowhohugsmeandki
ssesmy
l
i
ps.
“
I’
m sor
ryt
hatLwandl
elwenkosi
won’
t
beher
efory
ourl
aunchmychi
l
d”
“
It
’sokaymamahewi
l
lbebacksoon”
shepassesmet
oherhusbandwho
embr
acesme
“
Unj
ani
ndodakaz
iyami
”
“
Ngi
yaphi
l
ababaunj
ani
wena”
“
I’
m al
sof
inemychi
l
d”Theki
dsal
ready
r
ani
nsi
det
hehouseex
ceptgr
umpy
Emi
hle.
“
Heyl
i
ttl
esi
syougood?
”Shenodswi
th
herheadwhi
l
eherey
esgl
i
stenwi
th
t
ear
s.Ienv
elopeheri
nmyar
msandshe
bur
sti
ntoal
oudsob.
“
Youcancomei
nfol
ksandmake
y
our
sel
fcomf
ort
abl
e.Youknowt
he
r
oomsy
ouusewheny
ouar
eher
e.Ij
ust
needt
imewi
thmyl
i
ttl
esi
ster
”It
ake
Emi
hle’
shandandski
pinsi
det
hehouse.
Wecr
awl
ont
opofmybedandIal
l
ow
hert
orestherheadonmybr
eastasshe
weepssi
l
ent
ly
“
Tal
ktomebabywhat
’swr
ong”
“
Ihav
en’
tbeeneat
ingf
orawhi
l
enow
becauseIwantt
olosewei
ghtt
hat
’sa
r
easonIf
aint
edatschool
”
“
Ohbabyy
ourwei
ghti
sokaymosy
ou
don’
thav
etol
osewei
ght
”
“
Youknowt
hat
’snott
ruesi
sI’
mfat
!”
“
Youar
eabeaut
if
ulchubbygi
rlsowhat
baby
”
“
I’
m al
aughi
ngst
ockatschool
because
I
’
mfatsi
s.Thet
hingst
heysayt
ome
hur
tsdeepdowni
nmyhear
t”myhear
t
si
nks
“
OhbabyI
’
m sor
rybuty
oushoul
dn’
t
l
i
stenwhatt
hoseki
dssayt
oyou.School
ki
dsar
emeanandr
ude”
“
Butt
heyar
eri
ght
….”Icutherof
f
“
Not
heyar
enotbabygi
rl
.Don’
tal
l
ow
t
heseki
dst
oki
l
lyourconf
idencey
ou
ar
ebeaut
if
ulasy
ouar
e.Ther
e’snot
hing
wr
ongwi
thy
out
heyj
ustwantt
omake
t
hemsel
vesf
eel
goodbyshami
ngy
ou
don’
tal
l
owt
hem t
obr
eaky
ouapar
tmy
l
oveokay
”shenodsherhead
“
Stopst
avi
ngy
our
sel
fit
’snotheal
thy
y
ouwi
l
ldi
efr
om st
arv
ati
onEmy
”
“
ButIdon’
tli
kemybodysi
sIwantt
o
l
osewei
ght
.Iwantt
ohav
eaf
latt
ummy
l
i
keEmi
l
y”
“
Thef
amousEmi
l
yatschool
?”Shenods
herhead
“
Whyher
?Isshet
heonewho’
scal
l
ing
y
ounames?
”
“
Shewasl
aughi
ngatmewi
thher
f
ri
endst
hatThomasdumpedme
becauseI
mfatandnowhe’
swi
thher
”
dumpedokaynowt
hisget
ti
ngdeeper
.
“
Youhav
eaboy
fri
endEmi
hle?
”Iask
cal
mlyIdon’
twantt
oscar
eherbutI
’
m
sur
pri
sedshehasaboy
fri
endandshe
nev
ert
oldmet
hat
.Idi
dn’
tex
pecthert
o
hav
eaboy
fri
endasy
etshe’
sonl
y15
y
ear
sol
dbat
hong!
“
Uhm Ihadone”
“
Okaywhathappened”I
’
mtr
yingmy
l
evel
bestt
obet
hecool
estsi
sterher
andSnocoul
dhav
esot
hatt
heycanbe
f
reet
otal
ktomebuti
t’
sseemsl
i
keI
’
m
f
ail
i
ng.
“
Hedumpedme”
“
Why
?”
“
Idon’
tknowmay
bei
t’
sbecausehegot
whathewant
ed”shesay
swi
tha
cr
acki
ngv
oiceandIpr
ayt
omy
sel
fthat
i
t’
snotwhatIt
hinki
tis
“
Andt
hati
s?”Ihearswal
l
owi
nghar
d
“
My.
.uh.
.er
hm.
.my
..
.vi
rgi
nit
y”myhear
t
dr
opst
omyst
omach
“
Didhef
orcey
ou?
”
“
Nosi
shedi
dn’
t”
“
Didy
ouusepr
otect
ion?
”
“
Yeswedi
dI’
m notpr
egnantsi
sift
hat
whaty
ouar
ewor
ri
edabout
”Isi
ghoutof
r
eli
ef
“
I’
m gl
adt
haty
ouusedpr
otect
ionbut
wer
eyour
eadyt
olosey
ourv
irgi
nit
y?”
“
Idon’
tknow”
“
Tel
lmet
het
rut
hEmmy
”
“
May
bey
esmay
beno”
“
Youwer
en’
treadysweet
hear
tyou
want
edt
okeept
hisboybysl
eepi
ngwi
th
hi
m becausey
ouwer
escar
edhewi
l
l
l
eav
eyouf
orEmi
l
yam Il
yi
ng?
”whatI
pi
ckedupf
rom ourconv
ersat
ionsi
sthat
Emi
l
yisj
eal
ousofmyl
i
ttl
esi
s.Emyi
sa
smar
tass,
str
aightAst
udentpl
usshe’
s
beaut
if
ul.
“
Noy
ouar
enotsheal
way
stol
dmet
hat
Thomaswi
l
lleav
emef
orherI
’
mjusta
f
atgi
rlandi
ndeedhel
eftmef
orher
af
terhef
uckedmeI
t’
shur
tsi
s”she
st
arscr
yingal
lov
eragai
nandhersobs
ar
ebr
eaki
ngmyhear
t.Iknowhow
pai
nful
fir
sthear
tbr
eaki
sbutshewi
l
lbe
pul
lthr
ought
hathowl
i
fei
s.
“
Thi
sboynev
erl
ovedy
oumybabyi
fhe
l
ovedy
ouenoughheshoul
dhav
ewai
ted
f
ory
ouunt
ily
ouar
ereadyt
olosey
our
v
irgi
nit
y.I
’
m sosor
ryy
ouhadt
ogo
t
hrought
hatbuthedoesn’
tdeser
vey
our
t
ear
sst
handwasami
.Don’
tal
l
owhi
mto
br
eaky
ouapar
themi
ghthav
etooky
our
i
nnocencebuthedi
dn’
ttooky
ourbeaut
y,
y
oursex
iness,
yourr
esi
l
ience,
your
br
il
li
ance,
yourpr
ide.Emyy
ouar
eyoui
f
noonewantaccepty
oul
i
ket
hist
heni
ts
t
hei
rpr
obl
em.Youdon’
toweany
oneany
ex
planat
iondon’
tseekv
ali
dat
ionand
accept
ancef
rom peopl
ewhodon’
tgi
ve
f
uckabouty
ouanddon’
tchange
y
our
sel
fforany
onedoy
ouhearme”she
nodsherhead
“
Wel
ovey
ouf
orwhoy
ouar
ebaby
,
mi
ddl
efi
ngerupt
othosewhodon’
tlov
e
y
ounorcar
esabouty
ouv
elet
hey
’re
not
hingt
oyou”
“
Thanky
ousi
snowIf
eel
bet
ter
”
“
I’
m al
way
sher
efory
ouEmy
.I’
mjusta
phonecal
lawaywet
alkev
ery
dayon
What
sAppwhyy
ounev
erment
ionedt
o
mey
ouar
egoi
ngt
hrought
hisear
li
er”
“
Iwasscar
edsi
s”
“
Scar
edofwhathav
eIev
ergav
eyou
r
easont
obescar
edofmeme?
”
“
Nosi
sI’
m sor
ry”
“
I’
m sohur
tEmyIwon’
tli
eIt
houghty
ou
t
rustmeenought
oshar
eev
ery
thi
ng
wi
thmebuti
ttooky
out
ofai
ntatschool
f
ory
out
otel
lmewecoul
dhav
e
pr
event
edt
hisEmy
”
“
IknowI
’
m sor
ry”
“
Pleasepr
omi
semet
haty
ouwi
l
ltal
kto
mewhenev
ery
ouneedt
o”
“
Ipr
omi
sesi
s..
.canIasky
ousomet
hing”
“
Yes”
“
Ain’
tyoudi
sappoi
ntedatmef
orhav
ing
sex
”
“
Honest
lyIam It
houghty
ouwi
l
lwai
t
unt
ily
ouol
dery
ouknow.
”
“
I’
m sor
rysi
s”
“
Wel
ear
nwi
thourmi
stakes”
“
Howol
dwer
eyouwheny
oul
osty
our
v
irgi
nit
y?”
“
Iwas18y
ear
sthoughIwi
shIwai
ted
unt
ilIwasol
der
”
“
Whywer
eyounotr
eady
?”
“
NoIwasr
eadyt
het
hinghav
ingsex
somehowi
ncr
easedmypr
obl
ems.I
t
wasnev
erpar
toft
hepl
ant
ofal
l
pr
egnantatt
heageof18.Iwasal
way
s
car
eful
ngacway
izanj
ekany
evuuu
i
sisu”
“
I’
m nev
erdoi
ngi
tagai
nIdon’
tgetwhat
i
sthef
ussaboutt
hatshi
thur
t!
”Il
augh
“
Thef
ir
stsar
eal
way
spai
nful
.Iknow
whaty
ouar
etal
ki
ngabout
.It
houghtI
wasdy
ing”
“
Haaaamet
ooy
hooosi
si.
..
butsi
sI
r
eal
l
ywantt
olosewei
ght
”
“
Youar
eachi
l
dyourwei
ghti
sthel
ast
t
hingy
oushoul
dbewor
ryi
ngabout
”
“
I’
m notachi
l
dsi
sI’
mfi
ft
een”Ir
oll
my
ey
es
“
Yesy
ouar
eyoungt
obewor
ri
edabout
y
ourwei
ght
”
“
Lookaty
ousi
syouhav
e3ki
dsbuty
ou
hav
eaf
latt
ummy,
bigboot
y,t
onedsex
y
t
ighsandl
egs.Mi
nangi
wubhav
unj
e”
“
HayEmydon’
tsayt
hat
.Youar
eokay
asy
ouar
ebuti
fyouwantt
odot
hisf
or
y
our
sel
fnotf
orboy
sorpeopl
eIwi
l
lhel
p
y
ou.
”
“
Pleasedon’
ttel
lmeaboutt
het
ipsy
ou
shar
eoni
nst
agr
am It
ri
edt
hem t
hey
di
dn’
twor
k”Il
augh
“
Hai
bogi
rl
yyazy
ouar
eonl
yonewho
sai
dtheyar
enotwor
king.
”
“
Theni
t’
smeansmyf
ati
sst
ubbor
nke”
“
Noi
t’
smeansy
ouwantf
astr
esul
ts.I
t’
s
doesn’
twor
kli
ket
hatsweet
yyouneed
t
obepat
ient
”
“
Wel
lthenI
’
min”
“
Rememberwear
edoi
ngt
hisf
ory
ou
neh?
”
“
Yessi
s”
“
Goodnowl
et’
sgodown”wegetupand
wal
kdownst
air
sIf
indmymot
her
sbusy
i
ntheki
tchen.Mom Zoi
spr
epar
ingt
ea
whi
l
emom i
spr
epar
ingt
ocook.
“
Ahhmot
her
syoudon’
thav
etodoal
lof
t
his.I
’
m sor
ryIkepty
ouguy
swai
ti
ng
butt
hisi
smyj
ob”
“
It
’sokaysi
swedon’
tmi
ndr
eal
l
y”
“
Hai
boZot
ell
hert
hatwear
edoi
ngt
his
becausewedon’
twantt
ost
arv
eour
husbandsngabesi
hlel
isi
goqei
zi
ndl
a
nt
ombi
”theybot
hlaugh
“
Ohi
t’
sli
ket
hatnow”Isul
k
“
I’
mjustki
ddi
ngmybabysot
ell
me
what
’sbot
her
ingy
ourl
i
ttl
esi
ster
”
“
Ipr
omi
sedt
okeepourconv
ersat
ion
bet
weenus”
“
I’
m hermom!
”
“
AndI
’
m herauntwedeser
vet
oknow”
ohsot
heyar
egangi
nguponmenow.I
checkf
orany
onewhocoul
dbel
i
steni
ng
t
hent
ell
them l
eav
ingt
heboy
fri
endand
v
irgi
nit
ypar
t.
“
Howdi
dImi
ssedal
loft
hisMi
raIwas
supposedt
onot
icet
hatshe’
snot
eat
ing.
”
“
Thepr
inci
pal
hast
oknowaboutt
his
anddosomet
hing.
”
“
Shedoesn’
twantt
hatmom Zo”
“
Shedoesn’
thav
etoknowIwi
l
lpayt
he
pr
inci
pal
avi
sitandhav
econv
ersat
ion
wi
thhi
m.Ther
emustbesomet
hingt
hat
hav
etobedone.Ther
e’snochi
l
dofman
t
hati
sgoi
ngt
obebul
l
iedhel
lno!
”
“
Mom don’
tshoutkeepy
ourv
oicedown
i
fshecanheary
ounowshewi
l
lknow
t
hatIt
oldy
ouandshewi
l
lnev
ert
rust
me”
“
Butt
hati
sunf
airMi
rat
hesechi
l
dren
ar
eour
sift
heykeept
hingsf
rom ust
hen
howwi
l
lwehel
pthem ”Mom Zo
compl
ains
“
It
’snoteasyt
otal
ktoy
ourpar
ent
s
aboutcer
tai
nthi
ngsandt
heydon’
twant
t
owor
ryy
ouguy
s.Let
’smakesur
ethat
wedon’
tdest
royt
het
rustt
heyhav
ein
mesot
hati
twi
l
lbeeasyf
ort
hem t
otal
k
t
omet
henIwi
l
ltel
lyouguy
sany
thi
ng
t
haty
ouneedt
oknow”
“
Likey
out
oldmet
hatSnohasat
att
oo”
mom Zosay
slooki
ngatmei
ntheey
es.
“
Umm l
etmet
aket
heset
othef
ather
s”
y
esI
’
mrunni
ngaway
.
“
Noy
ouar
enot
.Snot
handowi
l
ltaket
his
t
oherf
atheranduncl
e.”Shecal
l
sher
daught
erandgi
vehert
het
ray
.Ther
e’s
nor
unni
ngaway
.
“
YouknowSnohasat
att
oo”mom asks
“
Umm y
es”
“
Whyy
oudi
dn’
ttel
lmeMi
ra”mom Zo
asks
“
Idi
dn’
tthi
nki
t’
sabi
gdeadmom Zo”
“
Ofcour
sei
tsabi
gdeal
she’
s14y
ear
s
Mi
rashecan’
tbehav
ingt
att
oosi
nher
bodyl
etal
oneonherbut
t!
”Ohl
ord
t
heseki
dsal
way
sputmei
ntr
oubl
ewi
th
t
hei
rpar
ent
s!
“
I’
m sor
rymom Zookaypl
easecal
m
down”shedr
awsi
nadeepbr
eat
h
“
Youhav
etot
ell
uswhatar
ethesegi
rl
s
ar
eupt
oMi
rasi
ncet
hey
’reopent
oyou
mor
ethent
heyar
etous.
”
“
Iwi
l
lmom nowl
et’
schanget
het
opi
c
bef
oret
heywal
kinandhearust
alki
ng
aboutt
hem”Snowal
ksi
nwi
thacr
ying
honey
moon.
“
Nimenz
ani
umt
anami
Snot
hando”
“
Ithi
nkshewantt
osl
eepsi
s”It
akemy
daught
erandcr
adl
eher
.Sher
eal
l
ywant
t
osl
eepshecan’
tst
opr
ubbi
ngherey
es
“
Wher
e’sherpaci
fi
er”
“
Her
e”shegi
vesmeandIshov
eiti
nmy
daught
er’
smout
h
“
Hawuy
azt
her
e’sahai
rst
ylet
hatIwant
t
oshowy
ousi
s”Snosay
sassheshows
meherphonei
t’
snotapi
ctur
ebuti
t’
sa
message‘
canwepl
easegowi
thy
ou
guy
stot
hel
aunchwepr
omi
set
o
behav
esi
s.Tal
ktot
hepar
ent
sforus
pl
ease’
“
It
’sbeaut
if
ul”
“
Soy
ouwi
l
ldoi
t”
“
Yes”shegi
vesmeasmi
l
eandwal
ks
out
.
“
YouknowIwast
hinki
ngsi
nceMol
l
y
wi
l
lbeher
etol
ookaf
tert
heki
dsEmi
hle
andSnoshoul
dcomewi
thus”
“
No!
”Theybot
hsayi
nuni
son
“
Why
?”
“
Theyar
eki
dsMi
ra”
“
Stopt
reat
ingt
hesegi
rl
sli
keki
dst
hey
ar
eteenager
sforcr
yingoutl
oud.The
l
aunchwi
l
lbeonl
yforf
ewhour
sandno
onesai
dit
’sf
ort
headul
tonl
y”
“
NoMi
rat
heyar
enotgoi
ngendof
di
scussi
on”Thent
heysayt
hesegi
rl
s
don’
ttal
ktot
hem whi
l
etheyar
ethe
oneswhot
reatt
hem l
i
keki
ds.What
woul
dyousayt
osomeonewhot
hinks
y
ouar
eaki
d,not
hingatal
l
.Iwal
k
upst
air
stoputAz
alondwet
osl
eept
hen
comebackt
ohel
pmom wi
thcooki
ng.
6pm Mol
l
yar
ri
ves,
she’
sthenanny
.I
methert
hroughhersonNqobi
hewas
bor
nbl
i
ndandt
hedoct
orsdet
ect
ed
t
hatheneededt
ounder
goanoper
ati
on
t
ogai
nhi
sbutduet
olackofmoneyhe
di
dn’
tgot
hroughwi
tht
heoper
ati
on.
Thi
sot
herdayatt
hemal
lUl
i
themba
bumpedi
ntohi
scanet
hathowIgott
o
knowhi
m andheex
plai
nedt
omehi
s
si
tuat
ion.Iwassot
ouchedsohehas
onl
yhi
ssi
ngl
emot
herandt
heyar
e
under
pri
vi
legedsoIof
fer
edt
opayf
or
t
heoper
ati
onwhi
chwasasuccessaf
ter
16y
ear
sbei
ngbl
i
ndnowhecansee.He
wassogr
atef
ulsowashi
smom andt
he
mot
herof
fer
edt
obemynannyt
othank
mef
orwhatIdi
dforhersonpl
usI
neededananny
.Ofcour
seIdopayher
ev
ent
houghshewant
stowor
kforf
ree
f
ormeaf
terIhel
pedherson.I
fyourhel
p
i
scomi
ngf
rom t
hedeepestofy
our
hear
tyoudon’
tex
pectsomet
hingi
n
r
etur
n.Idon’
tbel
i
eveIshoul
dbul
l
yor
abusepeopl
ejustbecauseIhel
ped
t
hem.Mol
l
yneedsev
erymoneysheget
t
opr
ovi
def
orherson.i
t’
sfunnyt
hat
suchasmal
lamountof150kchanged
t
heboy
’sl
i
fe.Any
wayIi
ntr
oduceMol
l
y
t
oev
ery
oneaf
terwef
ini
sheat
ingwe
pr
epar
eour
sel
vesf
ort
hel
aunch.I
nan
hourwear
efi
nishandl
ooki
ngsmashi
ng.
Mom br
oughtmydr
essshedesi
gned
speci
all
yfort
hisni
ght
.Iki
ssmybabi
es
t
hent
hel
i
mousi
near
ri
vest
otakeust
o
t
heourdest
inat
ion.Wemakeourwayi
n
andIspotSt
arandLeeandwal
kto
t
hem.
“
Hoes”Theyl
aughandweshar
ehugs
“
Youl
ookgor
geousboobear
”
“
Thanky
oumySt
ary
oul
ookdashi
ng.
”
“
Whataboutme?
”Leesul
k
“
I’
m comi
ngt
oyougi
rl
yfundaukul
i
nda!
”
Wel
augh
“
Youl
ookst
unni
ngbaby
”
“
Thanky
oumyl
ove.
..
let
’sgetst
art
ed
al
readysomeofushav
epl
ansaf
tert
his
l
aunch”shebi
tesherl
i
pwhi
l
est
ari
ngat
St
ar
“
Ahni
njal
okonj
eni
na”Theygi
ggl
e
“
Don’
tbej
eal
ousi
t’
snotourf
aul
tyou
ar
eonst
arv
ati
on”St
arsmi
rksmx
mI
pushherandwal
ktot
hef
rontl
eav
ing
herl
aughi
ng.Igr
abt
hemi
cand
ev
ery
onet
urnt
olookatme.Imustsay
Leeandhert
eam di
dagr
eatwor
kher
e.
Ther
e’sGuguov
ert
her
ewi
thher
husband,
shewav
esatmeandIgi
veher
asmi
l
e.Ov
ert
heset
wopassedy
ear
s
ourr
elat
ionshi
phav
egr
ownt
obemor
e
t
henwhati
tusedt
obebef
oreandI
coul
dn’
tbehappi
er.
“
Eveni
ngev
ery
onewel
comet
o
Moonl
i
ghtReor
dsIwoul
dli
ket
othank
ev
ery
onef
orav
ail
i
ngy
our
sel
fint
his
l
aunch.
”Thi
sismyf
ir
stbi
gachi
evement
t
henex
tonewi
l
lbenamedaf
termyson
Ul
i
thembat
henl
astonewi
l
lbenamed
af
termyl
astbor
nAz
alondwe.Icont
inue
wi
thmyl
ongspeechmaki
ngsur
ethatI
don’
tfor
gett
othankt
heMZr
ecor
dsf
or
gi
vi
ngmeanoppor
tuni
tyt
oex
posemy
t
alent
.Ial
sot
hankmyhusbandwho
coul
dn’
tmakei
ttodayashe’
sint
heUSA
t
henmyf
ami
l
yfort
hesuppor
t.Ihear
t
hisl
oudcl
apcomi
ngf
rom byt
hecor
ner
t
hemomentI
’
m donewi
thmyspeech.I
l
ookupandcov
ermymout
hwi
thmy
hand.Ev
ery
onej
oinhi
m bycl
appi
ng
handswhi
l
elooki
ngathi
m swagger
ing
t
owar
dsme.Damnhel
ooksgor
geous
asal
way
sitf
eel
sli
keIhav
en’
tseenhi
m
f
ory
ear
s.Imeethi
m hal
fwayandt
hrow
my
sel
finhi
sar
mshewhi
sksmeof
fthe
gr
oundandt
wir
lwi
thmecausi
ngmet
o
gi
ggl
ethenputmedown.Icuphi
sface
ashedr
opshi
shead,
ourl
i
psmeetand
pr
ovi
del
i
fesour
cewehav
ebeen
mi
ssi
ngf
ormont
hsandourt
ongues
meeti
nawel
comi
ngdance,
del
i
ght
ing
eachot
her
.Byt
het
imewebr
eakt
he
ki
sswear
ebot
hbr
eat
hingheav
il
yand
cl
ear
lywehav
efor
got
tent
hatwehav
e
anaudi
ence.
“
Ithoughty
ouwer
enotcomi
ngbabe”I
wi
pehi
sli
pswi
thmyt
humb
“
Icoul
dn’
tmi
sst
hisspeci
alday
congr
atul
ati
onsmyDol
l
face”
“
I’
m sohappyy
oucamemyCuddl
e
Cakes”Igi
vehi
m ahugandhe
env
elopesmei
nhi
sar
ms.Ibr
eat
hei
n
hi
scal
mingscentasIsi
nki
nhi
sar
ms.
I
nthi
smomentnot
hingmat
ter
sex
cept
t
hathe’
sher
ewi
thme‍
.
.
.
.
Pr
incessAz
alondweNkosi
-
Pr
inceSi
phi
wey
inkosi
Msi
mango
-
.

*
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*The
End*
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