Write a paragraph about the topic :”do you think women should go to

work? Why or why not?”

SAMPLE 1 ; In my opinion, whoever needs to work, not except

women. They need to work to be able to support themselves, buy what
they want, do what they like without depending on others. If not
working, they will become a burden for men. However, women are more
disadvantaged??? than men, so women should do jobs that are suitable for
their abilities, and no one has the right to force them to do heavy
work (How this idea link to your topic?. In short, no matter who it needs to
work, but it must be fair to everyone. (89 words).

- Pay attention to the word length of your paragraph

- Your supporting ideas are not sufficient and some are not relevant
- You should give more reasons why women should go to work
- You should have a counterargument and a refutation
Topic: do you think young couples should live with their
parents after getting marriage.

I think young couples should live with their parents after getting
married. This will make it possible for them to save large sums of money
from home purchases and some living expenses. They will not have to do
all the housework because, their parents can help. When young couples
have children inexperience that makes it very difficult for them to take
care of the baby, during which time the parents will be experienced
enough to help them(I understand your idea but you should write this
sentence again to make your point clear). The most important thing is that
when their parents are old they can take care of them. in short, it is good
for both them and their parents to live with their parents after
marriage. (there is no sentence above about living together is good for
parents, so you should rewrite your concluding sentence).

- You have a clear view and a clear topic sentence

- You should use some linking words to show how many reasons you
give (First, second, etc.)
- You should give further details after each main point.
- You should have a counterargument and a refutation
Topic 3:Write a paragraph about the topic:” Do you think young
couples should live with their parents after getting marriage? Why or
why not?

Living with parents-in-law is a tradition in many Asian countries.

There are many views on whether to live with parents-in-law. In my
opinion, depending on the circumtances and the treatment of
my husand’s family, I have to decide whether to live together or not .
Living with parents-in-law also has benefits, for example being able to
help take care of your baby, shop, cook, ..etc . But there are also certain
disadvantages: Mther-in-law more attentive to his daughter-in-law and can
impose old ways of teaching whom??? in harmony with the
present. Interfering in the couple’s private affairs (This is not a sentence).
So , whether or not to live with the husband’s is always an unanswered
question of many women of all times. And try to express your thoughts to
get sympathy from your husband if you have to live together.

- Your ideas are good but it is somewhat irrelevant to the topic. You
need to have a clear view to advise young couples in general not for your
own choice.
- You have some excellent word use with correctness.
- It’s easier to write one clear view rather than you have a neutral
view, so to get a high grade, you should choose one view to write.
Describe your favourite celebrity

With the desire to love mysterious and mysterious music, I have found
someone who
can help me satisfy that passion. Nobody else, it is Alan olavWalker with
the nickname Alan Walker. As a male DJ and a record producer, he started from
2012 to present. During his activities in 2014, he made a lot of impressions with
the song“Fade”. At first I thought the song was really ordinary, but after listening
to it three times, I was completely absorbed by it. And what has come has come, I
officially became a loyal fan of him. Talking a little bit about Alan Walker (this is
not suitable for writing) , he is Norwegian of Russian descent, with blue eyes and
white skin that really attracts women. In terms of music, he knows the color
scheme of his songs, and his songs all contain a lot of mysteries. He is a
mysterious person whose works also speak part of his personality, Alan Walker is
really a genius in music when he was a child he composed many hits for himself.
Alan Walker is an idol in my heart.
- Your paragraph just has some minor spelling and grammatical errors
- But the information is not for descriptive paragraph (except the underlined
sentence) because you give information rather than use adjectives to describe your
idol.
- You should write a topic sentence with a controlling ideas to imply readers that
you are going to describe something about your idol (appearance and
characteristics, for example)

In my opinion, women should go to work. Although women and men

have had different roles in the community since the beginning. (This
is not a sentence) All of those are said that women are more suitable
for housework and men should be the breadwinners. Firstly, it is
assumed that men should go out to work (is this a reason for women
going to work?). Undoubtedly, men are better adapted genetically to
perform physical tasks. Take for example the Olympics (not a
sentence). Secondly, it has been argued that women are more suitable
for their traditional roles in the home. But a women’s value is largely
dictated by the society, culture and history. In traditional societies in
Africa, females working is frowned upon and is seen as reglecting the
family but it is widely considered sexist in modern western
societies(in the past???). Many women nowadays are in positions of
power and changing the world to a great extent. For example, Angela
Merkel is the chancellor of Germany and currently ranked as the
world’s second most powerful person by Forbes magazine. To
conclude, differences do exist though these are largely through
nature (how this conclusion link to your topic???). However, it is a
flawed stereotype that women should be at home and the workplace is
not for them.
- Your ideas are impressive but the supporting ideas are not clearly
supporting your opinion paragraph.
- You use a lot of uncommon words or phrases but your ideas are not
logically developed.
- Two of your main points do not explain your view on why women
should go to work.
- You have problems with sentence structure as well, some are not
sentences.
I hold the view that physical education should be a
compulsory suject which is beneficial for student. First, physical
education helps student relax after stressful studying,
student (punctuation, S-V agreement) havetime for outside activities
that they can not find in class. Second, physical education
is necessảy because studenet nowadays usualy stick their eyes on
books and TV or Computer or mobile phone screen. They expose to
digital devices too much that they are slowly becoming
inactive. 2 things are enough to support physical education should be
a compulsory subject. That why physical education plays
an imortant part in subject’s timetable, student have (punctuation, S-V
agreement) chance to act and move their body. Futhermore, exercises
can enhance resistance and embace immune system. It also
can stimutale growth process, avoiding dangerous disease such
as cutism and major depression disorder. In brief, physical
education should be a compulsory subject because is very important
and beneficial to students.

- You have a very clear point of view, good topic sentence and relevant
supporting ideas.
- You use a lot of uncommon words but there are many spelling
mistakes
- You have problems with punctuation and S-V agreement.

Today, I will talk about (this is not for writing, speaking only) the most
difficult experience I have ever experienced in my life. I think this is the
most difficult thing I ever thought it was my failure of basic English
knowledge, and it was really embarrassing when theunderclassmen asked
me about this subject. But now I dare to change myself, find solutions
to treat them in time for years I (punctuation) neglect them, but luckily
from the embarrassment and shame I have a plan that can help us get rid of
them. Firstly, if we want to overcome ourselves in the face of all the
adversities of life, we must be courageous, dare to change ourselves, and
accept life's challenges. Secondly, to have a positive thought, try to be
persistent to the last moment. In short, be a strong girl, always trying to
find solutions to overcome difficulties to get what you want and go to
success, do not be discouraged.
- You have a topic sentence but your supporting ideas are not well
support your main point. This is a narrative paragraph, so you should have
detail information in the beginning, tell more about your difficulties.
 - You use some words incorrectly, so it’s hard for the reader to follow
your idea.
- The main tense should be past simple
- You have two points with firstly, secondly but you are writing about
solutions which is not suitable for your narrative (just give brief in a
sentence- your solution to your difficulty).
- You should edit your concluding sentence to make it more suitable
for your topic.
In my opinion, I suppose students should do past time jobs
for some reasons. The most obvious reason for past time jobs
is to earn money. Each month, students must spend a lot of
money, but they do past time jobs that can help the parents
pays like: rent a house, buy clothes, food, etc. (rewrite this
sentence to make your point clearer). Besides, past time jobs
will help students get many skills in life, especially in the
communication skills. Working environment helps
you must meet many people that this thing is the advanced
skills for you ??? (I don’t understand what you mean?),
I prefer to do past time jobs. Many people might say that do
past time jobs is impossible (Subject? Verb?)to concentrate on
their studies, but I do not care. I really
like to past time jobs because I can get to know many people
and make new friends. All in all, students should do past time
jobs because you have more experience, but I believe
that past time jobs are not affect to studies if you arrange a
time suitably. (This refutation should be right after your
counterarguement)
Many people might say that do past time jobs is
impossible (Subject? Verb?) to concentrate on their
studies, but I believe that past time jobs are not affect to
studies if you arrange a time suitably.
- Good and clear topic sentence
- You have a counterargument and a refutation but they are not written
clearly and logically.
- Your concluding sentence need to cover 2 main points rather one.
 - You have some limitation in expressing your ideas
Living with parents after marriage can benefit everyone. First, it
is important for couples to have an independent life and
relationship together, but living with extended family members
can strengthen relationships within the family. Second, it's great
that children grow up close to their grandparents,
it (punctuation) can be a good financial alternative, and the big
family's home is a home full of love (this sentence has one or
two main points here?). It's important for everyone to respect
each person's privacy, but living with your parents can be a
great alternative. from each other.But with your parents-in-law
constantly being around, you may no longer be able to
spend quality time with your wife at home. And it is their home
that you live in, you will find it very difficult to tell them to
give you time alone. (are these sentences about benefits or
disadvantages?)
- You have a clear view from the beginning but your supporting
ideas are both support and give opposite view (not a
counterargument)
- Some ideas are not well written, so it is hard to understand
what you mean.
- You have some good use of less common words at the
beginning.
When I was a child, I was given a Puzzle toy on the eve of Christmas as a
gift. I was truly surprised when my maternal uncle came to our home to
give me the wonderful gift. A medium plastic container wrapped in papers
was given to me and when I opened the container, I found the blocks. I was
highly surprised and happy toofor the excellent gift from my uncle. The
blocks were made of top-class plastic and there were no sharp edges.
They were of different sizes, and some of the block pieces were attached
with wheels. The block shapes were not the same. I used to make different
structures with the block set. I preferred to make robots, airplanes, cars,
houses and other stuff using the block set. The block set was important to
me for several reasons. Firstly the blocks looked nice and were handy to
use. Secondly, it has taught me patience and perseverance - when I used
to fail in making any desired or imagined structure. In short, I really enjoyed
this gift.
- You have a very good paragraph with only some minor mistakes.
- If possible, you can use more adjective to describe about the sizes and
the colours of the block set.
- You should change the concluding by combing 2 previous sentences

In short, I really enjoyed the gift because of its colourful and compact
appearance as well as its meaning of teaching me about patience and
perseverance when I played with it.

Music is an indispensable thing in my life

it(punctuation) helps me relax when I'm tired,

Nguyen (punctuation) Thanh Tung, known by his stage name

Son Tung M-TP is a Vietnamese pop singer and that's also a

person. I really admire him. He is a native of Thai Binh and is

also the pride of the Vietnamese people. He has always tried

his best to have the success he is today. Besides, thanks to the

advantage of appearance along with his inspirational voice, he

is increasingly winning the hearts of music lovers both

domestically and internationally. Therefor I really like him

because he has a talent that I admire so much.

- You should write a clear topic sentence with a controlling

idea
- You focus on giving information about your idol rather than

describing him, so you should edit in your final writing (you

may give further information about his appearance, his

fashion style, or how his music talent tough his fan’s feeling)

Young couples should not live with their parents after getting married. The first
reason is they will not be independent. The young couples have their parents who
do housework and work help them, so they can not consciously do their own thing
and depend on their parents. Secondly, young couples and their parents may have
more controversy if they live together. Living in a house
with older generation may inevitably lead to conflictbecause of the generation gap.
Gradually, the relationship between them might be bad. Besides, many young
couples give salary to their parents, so they don't have
financial saving skill.Finally, they do not be free with their hobbies. For instance,
young couples like to stay up late and play loud music, but their parents hate it.
Nowadays, many people think that if young couples live together with their
parents, they will reduce housework and babysitting, but I believe that benefits are
stronger than drawbacks???? This conclusion is opposite with your view?
- Your view is very clear from the beginning and the supporting are relevant.
- You have a conclusion but it seems to be opposite your view.
- You try to have a counterargument but it is still unclear.
WRITE A PARAGRAPH TO DESCRIBE AN IMPORTANT PARTY THAT YOU HAVE EVER TAKEN PART IN.
I have attended many parties on different occasions in my life but the most enjoyable one was a
surprise party that I held to mark my elder sisters twenty-fifth birthday. After my sister had left for
work in the morning, I started decorating our garden and installing the setup including the tables
and chairs. My mother started baking her favourite chocolate cake while I called all her friends and
our relatives to the party in the evening. The celebrations finally commenced and all the guests had
arrived before she came back home. We welcomed her with the birthday song and hugs from
everyone. We all had an amazing time at the party. Everybody socialized, and we played party
games, danced and had a lot of fun throughout the evening. My sister got gifts from everyone and
was all smiles ?? when I gifted her a necklace. She thanked me profusely for organizing such an
amazing party. (156 words)
- A very good paragraph with a clear topic sentence, supporting ideas.
- You have verb consistency in your paragraph
- You use words/phrases correctly with some uncommon words/ phrases
- You should end your paragraph with a conclusion

3. Write a paragraph about the topic: “Do you think students should do part time job?”
(120-150 words).
??) Especially, with the current credit-based learning style, you can completely choose and arrange
the time to go to
work (Is this information necessary. However, everything has 2 sides of it. In terms of benefits:
having extra income is the first thing you'll get when you work part-time. Your income will help cover
your essential needs. In addition, when making money, students will know how to value money and
value their labor. When working, in addition to earning more income, you will accumulate a lot of
experience. Many students who go to work do not realize that their skills are greatly improved. Skills
like communicating, persuading, or handling situations (it’s not a sentence). One thing that everyone
admits is that working part-time will help widen the relationship. Relationships with customers,
colleagues, and superiors will all help you. However, there will be some harms such as wasting our
time, affecting our health, affecting learning outcomes. Therefore, in my opinion, students should
work part-time if they know how to balance work between good study. (207 words)
- Pay attention to word limit (120-150 words)
- You should clearly state your view whether students should or should not do partime job
- Start your paragraph with a topic sentence
- Your supporting ideas are good but you need to rewrite some sentences and use some linking
words
- When you have a counterargument, you should have a refutation.
Currently, there are many definitions of part-time work.
However, it can be simply understood that this is an informal, irregular
job. In addition to studying and working, students can completely have
another job. Some part-time jobs that students often do are: serving,
delivering, mixing ???.

5. Write a paragraph to describe your most difficult experience you have had in
your life. (120-150 words)
Everyone's knowledge and skills are enhanced by their experiences in life, and me too, I also had the
toughest experience up to now which was the college entrance exam. For an 18-year-old girl like me,
the exam from high school to college is the biggest experience in life. I started studying for exams
since the summer break of 11th grade. I studied Math, Physics, and English. Because my English is
not good, I have to try a lot. All in my 12th grade year revolved around a cycle that was the journey
from home to school and from school to private tutoring. It was a very difficult time for me. But it is
not my life without the joys. My friends, teachers and family were always there and made me laugh.
I have tried my best, and I am currently studying at Hung Yen University of Technology and
Education. Although this is not the best result, I still have no regrets with my efforts. (Try to link this
conclusion with your topic sentence)
- Your paragraph is good
- Pay attention to the verb tenses
- Don’t use capitalization when it is not necessary.
- Try to use compound and complex sentences with correct punctuation.

TOPIC 3: Write a paragraph about this topic: ‘’Describe your most favorite celebrity
(famous singer or film star) you really admire. What does he or she look like? What
are his/her qualities?’’
Music is indispensable in my life. It helps me relax when I'm tired. There is a singer that I love and
admire very much. Her name is Lyly (Nguyen Hoang Ly). She has a pretty appearance like a princess
in fairy tales. She is quite tall and petite with long brown hair and a high nose. Despite her young
age, she has achieved many achievements in her music career. She not only sings well, but also
composes the music herself. Even as a small girl, her talents are not small. They often call her '' The
hit maker ''. She is behind hits such as "Black Rock without sugar", or the song "It's okay, I'm here!"
sung by singer Suni Ha Linh, etc. topped the Vietnamese music charts for a long time. She devoted all
of his talent and youth to music. Everyone who loves and admires her for not only her singing well,
but also her kindheartness. She often helps and sponsors psychiatric hospitals and nursing homes. I
believe that Lyly is not only my idol but also that of many others and she will forever be the idol in
my heart.
- You should start your paragraph with a topic sentence with a controlling idea - Try to focus on
describing rather than giving information about your celebrity - Try to use more
compound/complex sentences

5. Write a paragraph on this topic:" Do you think Should parents give their children
pets? Why or Why not? "
I like most animal as long as they are not harmful or dangerous , but my favorite animal is dog . Dogs
aren’t only animals, but also they are close to human being in life. dogs are wellknown for their
intelligence and loyalty and in my point of view their apperances are very buddy- buddy . I’m raising
an Alaska dong whisch is a large breed of domestic animal . my dog has a double coat the under coat
is soft , while the outer on is coarse and water-proof . in addition , its coat has two colors : black and
white. There are so many of reasons why I love dong . firsly , dogs are the most popular animal to
show such and loyalty to people . recently , it assisted police to find out dangerous criminals who
stole items of pedestrians . but it also took me time and money to take good care of it. For me , my
dog is a friend, I can play with after school. I hope parents come up to give their kids the pets they
love.
- Your paragraph is off topic. It is not an opinion paragraph.
- There are many spelling mistakes, capitalization in your careless writing - You have to write again
this paragraph otherwise you may fail.

The story of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is always something that many people are
interested in, especially after getting married. This difficult relationship is the main reason why many
couples choose to live away from their parents-in-law. And is that a good choice? In my opinion, I
should live with my parents-in-law. Because when living with your parents, you will reduce the
economic burden and decrease a lot of costs. And in addition, when living in your husband’s house,
you will be able to share your housework. You do not have to be busy after every hour working for
picking up and cooking. Besides, you will gain more cooking experience, living from your mother-in-
law so that you can become a passionate woman who takes care of her family. Moreover, you will
also have less of the burden to take care of the children. When your baby is too young, his/her
grandparents are the most suitable person to entrust with peace of mind. From there, you can
wholeheartedly concentrate on the work. Therefore, living with a mother-in-law is very beneficial for
a woman’s married life.
- Your paragraph is very good with clear and relevant main points - You can use some less
common words
- Pay attention to some minor mistakes on punctuation
- You should have a counterargument and a refutation

8. Write a paragraph about this topic: “Do you think physical education should be a
compulsory subject? Why or why not?”.
I think physical education should be a compulsory subject because physical education programs in
school have direct benefits to students’ health. Firstly, if you get enough exercise, it will help to fight
many diseases and promote muscle and bone development. Secondtly, s
(What do you mean?). Third, when learning physical education to help students become more
inclusive and active even more important is a healthy body (what is the subject of the sentence??
and what do you mean?). Fourth, it will help students have a more alert spirit to complete their
learning in class. In short, I think physical education should be a compulsory subject because it’s
necessary.
- You have a clear topic sentence and a good concluding sentence - Some ideas are difficult to
understand
- You need to rewrite some sentences to make your writing better - You should have a
counterargument and a refutation
student
participating in physical education will be provided
with basic knowledge about a healthy life style, which are the foundational elements so
that they can develop healthy ??? and have good knowledge

Do you think parents should let their children have pets? Why or why not?
Between humans and pets appeared a close and close relationship. In my opinion, parents should let
their kids have pets.
(This is not a complete sentence). It will also cherish and treat the children as their good friends, and
the children can share their joys and sorrows with them. Furthermore, children can talk to their little
dog for hours ,and the dog does not get bored (How this idea link to the previous sentence or your
topic? Why it is the little dog and not other pets?). This can help the child overcome any stress and
difficulties. Second, if children create a good relationship with their pets, they will feel their life more
meaningful. Its funny gestures will make the children forget about all the worries and tensions at
work (This sentence should support the previous idea (about overcome any stress and difficulties)
but not idea about meaningful life). Children can enjoy their life comfortably. In general, there is a
close relationship with pets (repeat the previous sentence). This will give your kids a clear
understanding of the entire animal kingdom. Therefore, the children's lives will find happiness from
small pets around them (children’s lives or children?)- Cuộc sống của trẻ em sẽ tìm được hạnh phúc
hay trẻ em sẽ tìm
được hạnh phúc??.
- Your paragraph has a clear view but your ideas are not well-supported. - Some ideas are
repeated and some are quite difficult to follow.
- You should restate your view in the concluding sentence.
- You should have a counterargument and a refutation
First of all, when their children
take care and treat pets well

Write a paragraph about the topic :”do you think women should go to work? Why
or why not?”
In my opinion, whoever needs to work, not except women. They need to work to be able to support
themselves, buy what they want, do what they like without depending on others. If not working,
they will become a burden for men. However, women are more disadvantaged??? than men, so
women should do jobs that are suitable for their abilities, and no one has the right to force them to
do heavy work (How this idea link to your topic?. In short, no matter who it needs to work, but it
must be fair to everyone. (89 words).
- Pay attention to the word length of your paragraph
- Your supporting ideas are not sufficient and some are not relevant - You should give more
reasons why women should go to work
- You should have a counterargument and a refutation
Topic: do you think young couples should live with their parents after getting
marriage.
I think young couples should live with their parents after getting married. This will make it possible
for them to save large sums of money from home purchases and some living expenses. They will not
have to do all the housework because, their parents can help. When young couples have children
inexperience that makes it very difficult for them to take care of the baby, during which time the
parents will be experienced enough to help them (I understand your idea but you should write this
sentence again to make your point clear). The most important thing is that when their parents are
old they can take care of them. in short, it is good for both them and their parents to live with their
parents after marriage. (there is no sentence above about living together is good for parents, so you
should rewrite your concluding sentence).
- You have a clear view and a clear topic sentence
- You should use some linking words to show how many reasons you give (First, second, etc.)
- You should give further details after each main point. - You should have a counterargument and
a refutation

Topic 3:Write a paragraph about the topic:” Do you think young couples should
live with their parents after getting marriage? Why or why not?
Living with parents-in-law is a tradition in many Asian countries. There are many views on whether
to live with parents-in-law. In my opinion, depending on the circumtances and the treatment of my
husand’s family, I have to decide whether to live together or not . Living with parents-in-law also has
benefits, for example being able to help take care of your baby, shop, cook, ..etc . But there are also
certain disadvantages: Mther-in-law more attentive to his daughter-in-law and can impose old ways
of teaching whom??? in harmony with the present. Interfering in the couple’s private affairs (This is
not a sentence). So , whether or not to live with the husband’s is always an unanswered question of
many women of all times. And try to express your thoughts to get sympathy from your husband if
you have to live together.
- Your ideas are good but it is somewhat irrelevant to the topic. You need to have a clear view to
advise young couples in general not for your own choice.
- You have some excellent word use with correctness.
- It’s easier to write one clear view rather than you have a neutral view, so to get a high grade,
you should choose one view to write.

Describe your favourite celebrity

With the desire to love mysterious and mysterious music, I have found someone who
can help me satisfy that passion. Nobody else, it is Alan olav Walker with the nickname Alan Walker.
As a male DJ and a record producer, he started from 2012 to present. During his activities in 2014, he
made a lot of impressions with the song “Fade”. At first I thought the song was really ordinary, but
after listening to it three times, I was completely absorbed by it. And what has come has come, I
officially became a loyal fan of him. Talking a little bit about Alan Walker (this is not suitable for
writing) , he is Norwegian of Russian descent, with blue eyes and white skin that really attracts
women. In terms of music, he knows the color scheme of his songs, and his songs all contain a lot of
mysteries. He is a mysterious person whose works also speak part of his personality, Alan Walker is
really a genius in music when he was a child he composed many hits for himself. Alan Walker is an
idol in my heart.
- Your paragraph just has some minor spelling and grammatical errors
- But the information is not for descriptive paragraph (except the underlined sentence) because
you give information rather than use adjectives to describe your idol.
- You should write a topic sentence with a controlling ideas to imply readers that you are going to
describe something about your idol (appearance and characteristics, for example)

In my opinion, women should go to work.

(This is not a sentence) All of those that women are more suitable for housework and men should
be the
breadwinners. Firstly, it is assumed that men should go out to work (is this a reason for women
going to work?). Undoubtedly, men are better adapted genetically to perform physical tasks. Take
for example the Olympics (not a sentence). Secondly, it has been argued that women are more
suitable for their traditional roles in the home. But a women’s value is largely dictated by the society,
culture and history.
as
(in the past???). Many women nowadays are in positions of power and changing the world to a great
extent. For example, Angela Merkel is the chancellor of Germany and currently ranked as the world’s
second most powerful person by Forbes magazine. To conclude, differences do exist though these
are largely through nature (how this conclusion link to your topic???). However, it is a flawed
stereotype that women should be at home and the workplace is not for them.
- Your ideas are impressive but the supporting ideas are not clearly supporting your
opinion paragraph.
- You use a lot of uncommon words or phrases but your ideas are not logically developed.
- Two of your main points do not explain your view on why women should go to work.
- You have problems with sentence structure as well, some are not sentences.
different roles in the community since the beginning.
Although women and men have had
are said
In traditional societies in Africa, females working is frowned upon and is seen
reglecting the family but it is widely considered sexist in modern western societies

I hold the view that physical education should be a compulsory suject which is beneficial for
student. First, physical education helps student relax after stressful studying, student (punctuation,
S-V agreement) have time for outside activities that they can not find in class. Second, physical
education is necessảy because studenet nowadays usualy stick their eyes on books and TV or
Computer or mobile phone screen. They expose to digital devices too much that they are slowly
becoming inactive. 2 things are enough to support physical education should be a compulsory
subject. That why physical education plays an imortant part in subject’s timetable, student have
(punctuation, S-V agreement) chance to act and move their body. Futhermore, exercises can
enhance resistance and embace immune system. It growth process, avoiding dangerous disease
such as cutism and major depression disorder. In brief, physical education should be a compulsory
subject because is very important and beneficial to students.
- You have a very clear point of view, good topic sentence and relevant supporting ideas.
- You use a lot of uncommon words but there are many spelling mistakes - You have problems with
punctuation and S-V agreement.
also can
stimutale

Today, I will talk about (this is not for writing, speaking only) the most difficult experience I have
ever experienced in my life. I think this is the most difficult thing I ever thought it was my failure of
basic English knowledge, and it was really embarrassing when the asked me about this subject. But
now I dare to change myself, find solutions to in time for years I (punctuation) neglect them, but
luckily from the embarrassment and shame I have a plan that can help us get rid of them. Firstly, if
we want to overcome ourselves in the face of all the adversities of life, we must be courageous, dare
to change ourselves, and accept life's challenges. Secondly, to have a positive thought, try to be
persistent to the last moment. In short, be a strong girl, always to find solutions to overcome
difficulties to get what you want and go to success, do not be discouraged.
- You have a topic sentence but your supporting ideas are not well support your main point. This is
a narrative paragraph, so you should have detail information in the beginning, tell more about
your difficulties.
- You use some words incorrectly, so it’s hard for the reader to follow your idea.
- The main tense should be past simple
- You have two points with firstly, secondly but you are writing about solutions
which is not suitable for your narrative (just give brief in a sentence- your solution to your
difficulty).
- You should edit your concluding sentence to make it more suitable for your topic.
underclassmen
treat them
trying

In my opinion, I suppose students should do past time jobs for some reasons. The most obvious
reason for past time jobs is to earn money. Each month,
(rewrite this sentence to make your point clearer).
Besides, past time jobs will help students get many skills in life,
especially in the communication skills. Working environment helps you
must meet many people that this thing is the advanced skills for you
??? (I don’t understand what you mean?), I prefer to do past time jobs.
Many people might say that do past time jobs is impossible (Subject?
Verb?) to concentrate on their studies, but I do not care. I really like to
past time jobs because I can get to know many people and make new
friends. All in all, students should do past time jobs because you have
more experience, but I believe that past time jobs are not affect to
studies if you arrange a time suitably. (This refutation should be right after your counterarguement)
Many people might say that do past time jobs is impossible (Subject? Verb?) to concentrate on their
studies, but I believe that past time jobs are not affect to studies if you arrange a time suitably.
- Good and clear topic sentence
- You have a counterargument and a refutation but they are not written clearly and logically.
- Your concluding sentence need to cover 2 main points rather one. - You have some limitation in
expressing your ideas
students must spend a lot of money, but they do
past time jobs that can help the parents pays like: rent a house, buy
clothes, food, etc.

Living with parents after marriage can benefit everyone. First, it is important for couples to have an
independent life and relationship together, but living with extended family members can strengthen
relationships within the family. Second, it's great that children grow up close to their grandparents, it
(punctuation) can be a good financial alternative, and the big family's home is a home full of love
(this sentence has one or two main points here?). It's important for everyone to respect each
person's privacy, but living with your parents can be a great alternative But with your parents- in-
law constantly being around, you may no longer be able to spend
time with your wife at home. And it is their home that you live in, you will find it very difficult to tell
them to give you time alone. (are these sentences about benefits or disadvantages?)
- You have a clear view from the beginning but your supporting ideas are both support and give
opposite view (not a counterargument)
- Some ideas are not well written, so it is hard to understand what you mean.
- You have some good use of less common words at the beginning.
. from each other.
quality

When I was a child, I was given a Puzzle toy on the eve of Christmas as a gift. I was truly surprised
when my maternal uncle came to our home to give me the wonderful gift. A medium plastic
container wrapped in papers was given to me and when I opened the container, I found the blocks. I
was highly surprised and happy too for the excellent gift from my uncle. The blocks were made of
top-class plastic and there were no sharp edges. They were of different sizes, and some of the block
pieces were attached with wheels. The block shapes were not the same. I used to make different
structures with the block set. I preferred to make robots, airplanes, cars, houses and other stuff
using the block set. The block set was important to me for several reasons. Firstly the blocks looked
nice and were handy to use. Secondly, it has taught me patience and perseverance - when I used to
fail in making any desired or imagined structure. In short, I really enjoyed this gift.
- You have a very good paragraph with only some minor mistakes.
- If possible, you can use more adjective to describe about the sizes and the colours of the block
set.
- You should change the concluding by combing 2 previous sentences
In short, I really enjoyed the gift because of its colourful and compact appearance as well as its
meaning of teaching me about patience and perseverance when I played with it.

life it
tired, Nguyen
a native of
success he
Music is an indispensable thing in my (punctuation) helps me relax when I'm (punctuation) Thanh
Tung, known by his stage name Son Tung M-TP is a Vietnamese pop singer and that's also a person. I
really admire him. He is Thai Binh and is also the pride of the Vietnamese people. He has always
tried his best to have the
is today. Besides, thanks to the advantage of appearance along with his inspirational voice, he is
increasingly winning the hearts of music lovers both domestically and internationally. Therefor I
really like him because he has a talent that I admire so much.
- You should write a clear topic sentence with a controlling idea
- You focus on giving information about your idol rather than describing him, so you should edit in
your final writing (you may give further information about his appearance, his fashion style, or
how his music talent tough his fan’s feeling)

Young couples should not live with their parents after getting married. The first reason is they will
not be independent. The young couples have their parents who do housework and work help them,
so they can not consciously do their own thing and depend on their parents. Secondly, young
couples and their parents may have more controversy if they live together. Living in a house with
older generation may inevitably lead to conflict because of the generation gap. Gradually, the
relationship between them might be bad. Besides, many young couples give salary to their parents,
so they don't have financial saving skill. Finally, they do not be free with their hobbies. For instance,
young couples like to stay up late and play loud music, but their parents hate it. Nowadays, many
people think that if young couples live together with their parents, they will reduce housework and
babysitting, but I believe that benefits are stronger than drawbacks???? This conclusion is opposite
with your view?
- Your view is very clear from the beginning and the supporting are relevant. - You have a
conclusion but it seems to be opposite your view.
- You try to have a counterargument but it is still unclear.
TOPIC 1 : Write a paragraph about the topic : “ Do you think woman
should go to work ? Why or why not?
TOPIC 2 : Write a paragraph about the topic : “ Do you think students
should do part time ? Why or why not?
From my point of view, students should take a
part-time job. First of all, working part-time helps
students earn more money to cover everyday
needs. They won't have to depend on their family.
This is very good, especially for students have
difficult circumstances. Secondly, working part-
time is useful for students' study. It assists them
to widen their knowledge and have good
communications skills. For example, students who
are studying English should take a part-time job in
some famous places where have many foreigners.
Therefore, they can practice English by being a
tour guide. Finally, working part-time helps
students have a good preparation for their future.
However, I can't deny that taking a part-time job
also has many bad effects such as studying
becomes worse or being tired of working too
much... In conclusion, I think students should take
a part-time job but not too much.
TOPIC 3: Write a paragraph about the topic : “ Do you think Physical
Education should be a compulsory subject ? Why or why not?
From my point of view, i think Physical Education should be a
compulsory subject . Because , Physical education should teach the
students how to move their bodies most efficiently in order to play
games, participate in team and individual sports, and encourage
lifelong physical activity. No other school curriculum approaches
these concepts in a “hands on” manner. Active bodies learn muscle
memory, which enables the person to participate in healthy activities
with more fluidity and effective movement. This allows for more
enjoyment of movement and exercise, which prompts more
participation throughout life, leading to healthier bodies. Physical
education also teaches communication without the use of
technology. Children today have their noses hurried in their cell
phones and video games. Verbal communication and body language
understanding is vital in team activities. Physical education provides
a vast amount if opportunities to practice communication skills.
TOPIC 4 : Write a paragraph about the topic : “ Do you think parents
should let their children have pets ? Why or why not?
In my opinion , parents should let their children have pets. Because
There are so many benefits that pets provide for kids! It's easy for
kids to get wrapped up in the idea of owning a new pet, but it's up to
their parents to make sure the experience is a positive one and that
the pets receive the care they need for their entire lives. For those
parents sitting on the edge, here are several positive reasons you
might not have thought of to bring a pet home for your kids such as :
Children who grow up in homes with pets have less risk of developing
common allergies ; Playing with dogs may help lower blood
pressure ; Kids with pets get outside more—to go for walks, run and
play—and enjoy all the associated health benefits ; Nurturing a pet is
an acceptable way for boys to "parent play"—to practice being
caregivers ; children with pets display improved impulse control,
social skills and self-esteem ;sharing the love and care of a family pet
forges an additional common bond among siblings.

TOPIC 5 : Write a paragraph about the topic : “ Do you think young

couples should live with their parents after getting marriage ? Why or
why not?