STRAIGHT GIRL STANDS UP FOR GAYS

Kelly joins her high school's Gay-Straight Alliance. Despite unpleasant reactions from some peers,
she participates in annual awareness-raising events.
BY KELLY COLÓN

In 5th grade, I had a friend who told me that she was bisexual. I had no idea what it was and I asked
her. “It means I like boys, but I like girls too,” my 12-year-old friend told me.
I had never heard of such a thing and I found it intriguing, since I had only seen straight couples in my
life. It didn’t occur to me that people might see anything wrong with same-sex relationships. Years
passed and I began to see more people who were interested in members of the same sex, including
a few of my mom’s friends. These friends were some of the nicest people I’d ever known, so it was
clear to me that there was nothing “bad” about being gay.
It felt especially important to support the cause since it was by no means unanimously favored in my
school.

Yet in my middle school there were a few people who were thought to be gay, and they were made
fun of. They weren’t physically bullied, but they frequently faced name-calling and taunting. When my
mom’s friend’s daughter came out to me, I admired her bravery to accept who she was and just be
herself, in spite of the teasing she’d probably face on account of it. There weren’t many opportunities
in middle school to support gay rights, but I kept an open mind.

Taking Action
In 9th grade, I saw my first chance to do something positive: My high school had a Gay-Straight
Alliance (GSA), so I joined it. We were a small group, and we’d try to think of things that we could do
in the community and in my school to raise awareness about discrimination and promote equality for
all orientations.

There were gay members, there were straight members, and there were questioning members. A lot
of times, the group ended up just being a place where we’d feel comfortable enough to talk about
anything. We’d talk about what our families believe about gay rights, whether we’d ever experienced
discrimination either for being gay or for supporting gay rights, and how we could stop the ignorance
and show people that being gay is just one part of who someone is. Being in the GSA taught me that
for any cause you support, there will always be others who share your beliefs—maybe more people
than I had initially believed.

The main thing we participated in was the Day of Silence. It’s a national, student-led event held every
April, during which participants refrain from speaking for a day to raise awareness of the silence that
the gay community must keep when they cannot be themselves.
In tragic cases, having to keep their true selves hidden leads some gay teens to depression, and
sometimes even suicide. (A Columbia University study published in 2011 found that gay, lesbian, and
bisexual teens were five times as likely as heterosexual teens to have attempted suicide at some time
in the previous year).

When I heard about the Day of Silence I immediately thought, what better way to promote acceptance
than by doing something so noticeable and powerful? It was also the first time I’d found a way to do
something proactive for a cause I believed in.

ELIJAH HICKSON
Mixed Reactions
Members of the GSA wore a red Day of Silence shirt, a pin, and a red bracelet to show support. But
other people who were not in the GSA ended up making it a competition to see who could stay silent
the longest, and some people used the day as an excuse to stay silent in class in order to avoid
answering questions.

Their idea of humor was my idea of ignorance. The day was meant as a reminder that people are
suffering, and I found it totally disrespectful to make a mockery of the day. A lot of people tried to get
me to talk; I just ignored it.
Aside from this, it was a positive experience. I especially liked watching more people get involved as
we handed out pins and bracelets, and later discussing the day with other people who took part. We
talked about why we’d wanted to play a part in the Day of Silence, why it mattered to us, and how we
felt the day went.

It felt especially important to support the cause since it was by no means unanimously favored in my
school. Even many teachers weren’t supportive (though some did wear the Day of Silence pin
themselves). In the three years that I’ve now participated in the Day of Silence, I’ve heard, “I ain’t
doing that f-ggot sh-t,” “That’s corny,” “Are you gay? Why are you supporting them?”—all from
students. I’ve also seen countless eye rolls, from teachers and students, when I answered their
questions about why we were doing it.

I was a little surprised to get a negative reaction from teachers. I thought that adults would be more
open-minded and would appreciate young people standing up for something that mattered to them.
But none of the reactions ever intimidated me, made me want to stop, or made me embarrassed to
support the gay community. Getting involved in things you feel passionate about is the way to stay
true to yourself, and I had nothing to be ashamed of.

Time for Equality

In my junior year, I attended the 2010 AIDS walk in Central Park. Anyone can become infected with
HIV/AIDS, but in the U.S. it has historically been more prevalent in the gay community. I walked five
or six miles with a group.

It was a fun experience; there were gay couples, straight couples, single people, and walkers of all
ethnicities. I even spotted a man dressed in a suit with glued-on condoms, spreading the message of
safe sex. There was something powerful about walking with a large group of people, knowing that I
was participating in a cause. No one was there to judge or to tease; we were all walking for the same
reason.

I find it silly that debates still go on about equality for the gay community. Whether or not a person
decides to love someone of the same gender, everyone deserves to be treated fairly and have their
rights respected. I’m glad I’ve been able to express this belief publicly through my participation in
GSA.

If you’re interested in starting a Gay-Straight Alliance at your school, you can find out more at the
Gay-Straight Alliance Network website, gsanetwork.org. To learn more about the Day of Silence or to
get involved, visit dayofsilence.org.