(water rushing)

(brooding music)
(fighting)

- Think I care about this dress?

(muffled arguing)

- [Voiceover] Sometimes someone hurts you so bad

- I don't think you understand.
- [Voiceover]] It stops hurting at all.
(brooding music)

Until something makes you feel again.

And then it all comes back.
Every word.
Every hurt.
Every moment.
How could you ever understand where I come from?

Even if you ask, even if you listen,

you do not really hear, or see, or feel.
You don't remember my story.
You haven't walked my path.
You haven't seen what I've seen.

(ocean waves)
(desolate music)

My past defines me.

This is who I am.
I am
unseen,
unheard
(camera flashing)
unwanted.
That is what I am.

If even I am anything.
(siren)
(car door)
(knocking)
- [Cop] You're under arrest.
Police.
Get on the floor.
(desolate music)
- [Voiceover] It seem like the seemed like
the same thing that held me up forced me down.
- No.
- [Voiceover] In a world turned upside down,
and order disappeared.
(baby crying)
Nothing was how it was suppose to be.
And a heavy sadness filled my soul.
(desolate music)
(crickets)
(thunder)
(desolate music)
- [Voiceover] Deeper and deeper I fell within myself.
- [Blonde Woman] It's all fluffy and fuzzy.
- [Voiceover] And nothing could show me out.
(baby crying)
Trapped in the misery of my life.
Lost in the sorrow of my soul.
Unable to see the light.
Unable to see the dawn.
To feel.
To hope.
- What are you doing picking my fruit?
- [Voiceover] To dream.
(screaming)
-[Voiceover] I found the darkest days of my life kept coming.
(screaming)
The blackest nights for my soul never stopped.
- No, No.
- Yes.
(screaming)
(water running)
- [Voiceover] It seemed like it
was always nighttime and nightmares,
and never morning.
And maybe you wonder why,
but mostly you try not think about it,
and try to get by,
and try to survive.
And all the other stuff seems so much like
nothing compared to just wanting
the most important things back again.
Like wishing you could see your mom smile again
and hear her sing that one favorite song that always
calmed you down when things were all messed up.
Or if you couldn't have her back,
at least get to take care of your baby brother
because you know he needs you,
and he's going to be so scared all alone.
And whose going to hold his hand
and whisper it's going to be alright to him?
(baby crying)
And who will whisper it to me?
- Hi ya, Zoe.
It's so good to have you here.
Are you ready to move in?
- [Voiceover] I know I'm helpless, dependent,
desperate, but what happens when those you
need the most threaten your very existence?
I've heard plenty of promises
and they all sound the same.
But push hard enough and sooner or later
they all prove to be empty.
The sun comes up every morning,
but do you know where?
Each place it's somewhere different.
It's hard to find east when you keep moving around,
but at least it comes.
It always comes.
I've come to depend on that.
And slowly, slowly seasons changed around me,
and it seemed this time that maybe the world
would not be pulled out from under me again.
Feet safe, roots starting to grow.
Little buds of hope for me.
Slowly attempting to trust this new life.
- Hi, come over and let me show
you what I got for you.
I got you a gift.
(far away arguing)
- Do you think I care about this dress?
I don't think you understand me.
Do you?
I don't think you understand me.
- [Voiceover] I wish someone would tell me (background arguing)
it would be O.K.
- I swear to God you touch me again, - I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I will kill you.
- Here let me help you.
- [Zoe] No, don't touch me.
- [Voiceover] That one day, maybe.
- I hate you, I hate you.
- [Voiceover] I'll feel normal.
- [Zoe] I hate you.
- [Voiceover] That I won't always be alone.
That I'll have a mommy who will hug me
and be strong for me,
because maybe I can't do it all by myself.
(desolate music)
- [Foster Mother] Hi, yes.
I'm calling to (whispering).
Thank you so much.
Thanks.
O.K. (whispering)
(desolate music)
(drawer slam)
(drawer slam)
(drawer slam)
- [Voiceover] This my past, my history, my story,
is not my fault.
It's not because of me.
And doesn't have to be what defines my future.
(desolate music)
I am lovable.
I am worthy of care.
And that glimmer of light, it makes all the difference.
The glimmers of light give me hope that someday
my summer will come.
(desolate music)