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Coal
Jokes
Did you hear about that guy who
hated coal?
Never mined
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Why did the worker at the coal mine

come to work immediately after he
got injured ?
because it was a miner injury
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I know an introverted entrepreneur

in the coal industry.
He mined his own business.
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If coal is so bad for the

environment...
why don't we just burn it all?
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A group of dwarves get jobs as coal

miners
After a week or so, one of the workers really
stood out and was getting special treatment
from the supervisor, Moe. The other dwarves
complained to HR and threatened to go on
strike.
The supervisor was called into the o!ce and
reprimanded. He explained that he was only
trying to keep the harde... read more

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Why do pine trees always get coal

for Christmas?
Because they are so knotty. That is seasonally
late dad joke.
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Coal
Its a burning issue
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A white guy, a black guy, and a

Chinese guy go to work at a coal
mine.
When they arrive the manager assigns each of
them a task. The white guy, Frank, is in charge of
digging. The black guy, Jamaal, is in charge of
transportation. The Chinese guy, Wong, is in
charge of supplies.

They get to work and everything is going

smoothly. Frank is digging up the coal at a rapid
pace. Jamaal is quickly transporting the coal and
the two have quite the e!cient operation going.

Slowly Frank's pick begins to go dull and his

shovel handle is breaking o". Jamaal's
transportation cart has a rickety wheel and they
need replacements from their supply man,
Wong. However, Wong is nowhere to be found.
In fact, no one has seen him all day long.
Frustrated, Frank and Jamaal go to find the
manager and explain the situation. The
manager is equally upset.

The three of them go about the mine looking to

find Wong. They search high and low, but Wong
can't be found anywhere. Extremely frustrated
and about to give up, they decide to take a look
down a dark, abandoned shaft. They peak their
heads in and suddenly Wong jumps out of
nowhere and yells, "SUPPRIES!!!"
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Neil Diamond used to be called Neil

Coal…
… Until the pressure got to him.
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Is anyone behaving badly just to get

coal in their stocking...
... so they can heat their house?
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I am over 18

What do a hooker and a coal miner

have in common?
They both work the shafts for pay.
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A walkie-talkie invited a lump of coal

to dinner and a movie.
Classic example of radio-carbon dating.
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What happened to the guy who fell

into burning coals at the bonfire?
He got really EMBER-ASSED.
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As we were driving down the road,

"Sweet Caroline" came on the radio.
I said to my son, "Little known fact,
Neil Diamond used to be called Neil
Coal."
"Until the pressure got to him."
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What do you call a country that is

entirely made out of coal?
A carbonation!
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Some poor children in Victorian

London were listening to Christmas
songs
They heard that Santa Claus gives coal to
children who aren´t on his nice list, and so they
commit as many petty crimes as possible to be
on his naughty list so as to not die of
hypothermia.
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Did ya hear about the coal mine that

caved in this morning?
Everyone got out, it was just a miner
inconvenience.
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I am over 18

Do you know how to confuse a coal

miner?
Show him a row of shovels and tell him to take
his pick.
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A wife comes back home to her

husband only to find out that the
building of her apartment has
caught fire
The place is surrounded by fireman and police
o!cers who are not letting anyone through. The
wife hysterically goes forward shouting at them
to let her through and that her husband was
inside.

The Fireman tries to calm her down, tells her his

condolences and that all the people that were
i... read more

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I am over 18

A gigantic gas explosion in a coal

mine in the next town killed thirty
workers and hospitalised two
hundred. But I refused to give to the
support charity.
After all, it was only *miner* injuries.
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Three guys walked into a bar

covered in coal dust...
The bar tender took one look at them and said,
"Sorry, but we don't serve miners here."
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I used to work at a coal mine

But I left because the bars didn't allow miners
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A German in a Bar
A German walks into a bar and orders a beer.

The bartender tells him : "20 euros!"

The German is shocked - "20 euros? yesterday it

was only 3 euros !"

"Well, today it is 20 euros."

\- "But why 20, damn it?"

Bar tender : "I'll explain it,

\-3 euros is beer,... read more

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I am over 18

If Donald Trump gets coal in his

stocking...
Is he happy or sad about it?
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Drake visits a town famous for

exporting coal...
He wanders around for an hour or so but leaves
disappointed as he couldn't find all the minors
he had heard about.
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I am over 18

This joke may contain profanity.

I am over 18

This joke may contain profanity.

I am over 18

Did you hear about the baby coal

that went missing?
They sent out an ember alert.
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I am over 18

America's new tax plan raises taxes

on coal miners
Which is weird. I thought American politicians
were rather fond of minors.
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What does someone with a history

or violence who digs up coal, and an
11 year old who swears at you
during online hames have in
common?
They're both o"ensive minors.
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People shouldn't be shamed for

their kinks. Me, I get really turned
on when someone smells like musty
sweat and coal.
But I always get called a monster when I admit
to being attracted to miners.
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Why did 25 letters of the alphabet

get coal for Christmas?
Because they were not E
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where do communists get their coal

from?
ours
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I am over 18

A man worked at a coal mine. He

beat up his colleague severely but
they let him go
it was a miner o"ense
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The Energy Crisis is so real…

… People want a lump of coal in their stocking.
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The Windmill, the Coal Plant, and

Geothermal Station Formed a Band
The Windmill, the Coal Plant, and Geothermal
Station Formed the Band "Earth, Wind, and
Fire". Their songs start o" slow but eventually
build in Energy. They would have been Electric
too if it wasn't for their Dam manager always
holding them back. He was Resistant to change
and couldn't see the Pote... read more

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I am over 18

For everyone that's getting coal for

Christmas...
Maybe we can meet up and get the grill going
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I refused to walk across hot coals

because I'm an environmentalist.
I didn't want to have a large carbon footprint.
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I am over 18

A German, a Polak, and a Chinaman

all get hired at a coal mine.
The foreman takes them down to show them
what they need to do. "OK, German, take that
pick and start knocking coal out of the wall.
Polak, shovel the coal and put it in the railcar.
Chinaman, you will be in charge of supplies. I'll
be back later to check on you guys." So about an
hour later, the ... read more

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A pyromaniac got a bag of coal for

Christmas...
Was he naughty or nice?
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My wife was naughty all year and

Santa didnt bring her coal.
He brought a ball gag, I guess he was listening.
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This Christmas...
Naughty children will be given £1 coins instead
of an expensive lump of coal.
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A grill master wanted to load up the

grill with more BBQ, but he was
running low on hot coals ...
So, he decided not to brisket.
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I am over 18

Santa probably regrets giving coal

Santa Claus probably regrets giving coal to
naughty children now that global warming is
threatening his habitat.
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When I was 18 I got Coal from Santa

Yup, raising Cole as a single mom was a
punishment for being bad, I guess.
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Why doesn’t scientology have any

coal workers?
because sects with miners is illegal
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I don't understand why we give bad

kids coal.
Isn't coal what minors want?
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Only Coal Miners Will Get This

Black lung disease.
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I opened a bar in the coal town of

Gillette, WY.
Unfortunately, I was shut down for serving
miners.
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Did you know that the Soviet Union

had absolutely zero coal mines?
Crazy fact! I heard however that there were
plenty of coal ours though.
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