"Man, I can't drive!

" "Don't be a scare-cat man, you have your three buddies

here, right Chris?" "Yeah Billy, just get your clutch and gas!" They stare at me
awkward. Last time I bumped this stolen car into drunk two buddies on a bike,
almost had a bumping fist with them. That's what I hate the most about traffic.
No matter how smooth I was like a cat's fur, it would be ended up as it's
tongue on some point. Jimmy is our quiet friend. Nothing really problematic
about him. But yeah, just one thing. "Jimmy how's your pal feet man I can't
help!" "HAHA! I got you man look at this!" That's what we like about Billy our
man. Our mercenary in a way. Always gave us a freakin suprise. We are going
to a barber shop near our hideout. We can't even afford a kindergarten bag so
we steal the barber stuff recent year. Mostly gilette. Our buddy Billy getting
scared as remembering about it. Imagining a france revolution I supposed.
Man I remember at high school while Mr Queen which is the guy with a secret
name as a history class teacher talk about it. In a rush he asked to the toilet
with wet pants on his chair. in A razor, comb that Billy obsessed about while
he doesn't have any hair. Charlie our leader always make a joke about making
our own barber shop and give a huge tax to them. "Will we do this for the rest
of our life, Charlie?" "We won't, in time." A wisest silly leader that we not
scared of, but not from the outside. "Hey don't park infront of it's door, man!"
"No witnesses this time, eyeball." We stealing it at 4 am. Not at night, not too
early. Charlie will get his mind of it. He's a Joe Pesci of our group. Not even
think of the locked door. We runoff it with our car. Billy immediately brought
the comb. Charlie standing in front the window. Not without any reason or
just to made a challenge. He wears the barber clothes and pretend it's owner
that wearing a yankee cap that he stole as well. I'm the normal guy bring the
razor and Jimmy with a knife. "Come on le't get out of here." "Charlie!" Billy
screaming with half confidence. "I'II drive!" "No, I'II drive, man! Give me the
key!" "You see that? He shed his loser skin!" We want to celebrate but get our
ass on a seat at first. "Badass, Billy!" "Too cool, too cool!" We're to excited, not
scared. In a Woodstuck Paper little city teenagers around our age can't have a
birthday again. Not without party, but without any soul in their body. Before
we escape, we often just driving to get some endorphine and going anywhere,
even officer department and stay for a while. Making us look like a victim.
Even Charlie laugh while sitting in front of the car. Angrily make sure to us
that he's pretending to cried, as like he's the actor himself. No matter what
street we get, we just immediate danger forresting. That's what we called of
this habit. One month escape is enough on that time. Our hideout is very
hidden. Real hidden! Getting a scope from our uncles that work as a grave
digger in the yard. We made some posters about how scared this forrest
written by anonymous. I logically said to them that we reduce tree cutting
effect. No doubt about it, now it's like a forrest with animal creatures like it's
before century. There's something in my mind. Something forbidden,
unexplained. Real opposite with what I just did few minutes back. "You mind,
Chris?" "Nothing." Charlie clearly unpredictable. He's the one that will people
scared, but admired. For some reasons I closed to him. While Billy and Jimmy
bonding without any single word. It's just a tree with a birdhouse with our
size. "Chris, let's get some air. Left this guys into their bromance before they
stab us.” “It nothing us. Police might be seeing us hanging around with this
razor.” There’s a tunnel and the thing that could up the water to drink it.
Hoping the sun could burned it well to digestive system. “Fine water when
thirst the most, right Eyeball?” “Almost die without it.” “Here, I got some
sugar.” Mostly market not have enough tasty ingridients to made well food.
Mostly healthy at some point. Expired? Don’t even think of that. I take the
knife to get those sugar mixed. Seeing the tornado inside while huge television
seems too tired to come here. “Look at you, a ghost inside.” “Thanks, dude.” I
really meant it. I mean seriously, hate to be so dramatic about that issue. I’m
tired to spoil that any kind of reaction of dramatic sadness. Not because of get
to be hardeness towards self stereotype, opposite thing to get blank inside.
“But serious man, you get some guts.” “You mean follow my gut?” “Man, I try
that million times and not work.” “How about you Charlie?” “That Ginny
seems get cold temperature towards you these centuries.” “Screw you man.”
“You mean to get woo huh?” “She’s catholic, big man. Want to woo somebody
get yourself a protestant.” “Jew’s good too.”
“Hey you two homos let’s get some sound.” “Jeez, I don’t bring a tape. How
about you, Jimbo?” “Let’s see.” The tape playing some sound, a real good
sound.

“The book of love is long and boring

No one can lift the damn thing
It's full of charts and facts, and figures
And instructions for dancing”

“Nice try, Billy!” “It’s Jimbo,” Billy excited. “Ohh, whatever.”

“Hey what’s that supposed to mean?” I asked to Charlie.” “What do you mean,
Eyeball?” “Nothing, just-“ “The lyrics, huh?” I get my jawline up and down to
answer his question. “I don’t know man, Blame the radio man, not us.”
“What’s the matter? You want to become one of them?” “Give me a deadwish
kid, I slice your throat.” Now I understand about him at this attude. He’s
harmless man with a great commitment. “Yes” or “No”. Not kind of “guess so”
type of doubtness. Now I’m not scared of him, or even get those strict words
even more. “I’m a writer, you deadwish.” Somehow Charlie not even smirk-
mocking me. Unexpected reaction by him. Glad to have close friend that not
eaten by stupid labelling. “You made me intimidated now, peeleye.” ‘Since
when Charlie Railman intimidated? By a smart girl?” “Shut up.” “But that’s
true, buddy. Brain blowing experiment unconsciously. Don’t even know what
they think, but we get it anyway.” “Who are you, Socrates?” “I don’t even try.”
“Hey you two, what we supposed to eat now? Our feet?” Jimmy the quiet one
starts screaming when he’s starving. I often used that method to get things
done. Remind me of my two lessons when I was 12. Picking a fight when
you’re hungry like a wolf, and driving when I hold pee so my mind focused on
the road, unless it’s a coincidence. “No, I keep the tunnel.” “Oh yeah Chris, just
say if you’re lazy.” “No man, I’m serious.” “You guys give me a hand, leave this
boy alone.” “Cool Jimmy, very cool.” Charlie ended the conversation everytime
unconsciously. I’m not like them, but I can pretend. Most of group like us
maybe look cool on TV show. But in real life, almost no one made it to mid
20s. Terrible irony isn’t it. While some good kid must be boring depends
which point of view people have, but can make it cool in my opinion. I don’t
feel very cool anyway. Maybe I built different and ended up different unlike
them. Most of our people ended up tragic, but still some raging hormone kid
want to be like us. Terrific, I can’t explain about this. Absurd if talking which
one is better. To go with the flow could be stupid as well. That’s why I’m too
lazy to talk about such thing. On the other side, three of them mostly come
back at 5 pm. Two days from now they might be eaten by a deer. I don’t really
interested in this anyway. But guess who, I’d like to talk to myself or smiling
alone. Won’t care of those silly stare thinking me crazy. Maybe they right, I’d
rather being silly. I mean who wants to be normal? Any more disturbance
dumbing hum and buzz, hitting my head on the tree without bleeding outside,
but maybe inside expecting to not iced. “Man what happened with Chris?”
Jimmy seems feel something inside me. Seems quiet but still keep them in
line. “I cherished this moment dude, real fun.” “Quiet, Billy. Next time you will
regret it.” “I can’t help it.” Billy still makes sense out of him. Easily interested
at something while most of people get bored. Recently he’s annoy us the most.
Somehow this habit keep us entertained. That comb stuff and his one inch
hair, and interrupting me when telling stories at campfire. “Hey, hey. Look at
that?” “A deer?” Jimmy whispers. “He’s wounded!” Billy’s overreactive habit
not disturbing this time. “I gotta kill him!” “No man!” It’s too late, Jimmy
sliced the deer’s throat. “I told you!” “What is it?” Billy asking, still curious.
“You know how Chris reacts.” Last time we shooting a bird, and I stunned like
someone getting someone they love getting killed. Am I weird or freak? I don’t
even know myself. Try to not loose it anyway. A boy liked that mostly get
insulted by society. But I don’t know they still keep hang around with me. Do I
have special ability? Not really for a bandit stuff. Jimmy used to be getaway
driver, Billy with his scared focus eyes surprisingly could be a gunslinger
alongside with Charlie and me. Mostly Billy keep the eye of those cops. Not
happen very often so we feel less guilty. How can you imagined 16 year old boy
killing bunch of people. Your hands must be tremorized. I even scared to
imagine killing my own cat Huctor at the same year. “Maybe we should do
something about him,” Charlie most likely wants to make things peacefully.
But not that simple. Charlie thinking like he’s dealing with math exam. Billy
just keep shares his excitement annoying mindset. “Oh yeah, maybe we should
give him some milk. My cousin had trouble with her thirsty throat. She’s
getting a bottle of milk, and “BANG!” She’s get out from the hospital five years
later!” “It’s mind problem Billy! You start pissing me off!” Jimmy starts
triggered with Billy. One more lesson, never triggers quiet people. “Hey, hey,
stop it guys!” Both comedic men quiet. They act like a front men soldier that
just accomplish their mission by captain’s order without a doubt; But
quarelling outside with their peers that I often saw in a movie. “Any of you
remember about Chris’s story?” “Oh-“ “SHUT UP, BILLY!” Billy jumpscared
by Charlie, but they know he will never stop his timid habit. “How about you,
Jimmy. Mostly quiet people share the brightest solution.” “Let me think.” We
know he could spread everything if he wants to, but no, we don’t need to
explain that. “About a raging quiet kid just turned 13 and aroused by his
Spanish teacher?” “Ahh, you’re the same either.” “Hold on, Charly” “Don’t call
me-“ “Let him talk, man. Must be something cool.” “I remember that story.”
“You pervert, dude.” Jimmy’s response doesn’t counted this time, irronicaly
for the first time as well. “So there is a boy named Gordo Heegins.” “Looks like
a four hand myth.” Onced again, ignored. “So at the first time in middle
school, nothing really good or bad either. Ohh actually he likes to smile to
everyone. But that’s all. Always asking for reassurance to his folks, assignment
and stuff. A heavy bag behind his back follows him everywhere. Some of
random kids just make fun of him and even a simple rhythm to get provoked.
What they don’t know is there must be law of attraction. Law is a law,
including itself.” “Something like butterfly effect, I heard,” Charlie’s literature
seems greater than he looks. “Excatly, but hold for a year before that.” “Tears
flowing through his eyes every night. He used to be mommy boy to coped with
his head struggle. No one seems understood. Or maybe it’s rare. But some of
them cared and talk toward him few times. But what they don’t understand is
they dealt with a sensitive kid that most likely remember the bad stuff tather
than good stuff. Sounds like someone with victim mentality right? But he
would called anyone who say that retard.” “He really say that?” Charlie
whispers get intimate with the story. Like he’s close with somebody like that.
“Yeah.” “What’s next?” “I forgot.” “Hold on, but it might be solve this
problem” “Don’t tell me it would be like dead-tied shoe, Charlie.” “No, Jimmy.
It’s not wrong at all.” “Let’s get back before Chris runaway again.” “What if
that maybe his own story?” Billy knock great sense to them. They immediately
packed their things, have some dead deer. Still thinking about my reaction,
but that should be a great time. I don’t believe in “Perfect timing”. It took me
for years to not believe it. But at childhood stage everytime seems perfect time,
no one can explain that for sure. It only takes five minutes to come back. Come
back to home always feel faster than go to another place. And sleeping on own
bed always most comfortable, even when it’s compared to a motel. I see the
dead deer, but this time I just had a little tears. Sometimes animals look more
precious and innocent than a human being. A bear to their babies, mama cat
and kittens are the one that melted my heart the most. “Sorry, Chris.” “It’s
okay man.” “I’m starving, actually.” Four of us laughing without giving some
hypocrite advice. Nurturing moments more valuable, even maybe the best. We
started the campfire and eating together. “Aw, it’s gross!” “Your fault, Jimmy.”
Jimmy starts become more active this time. “Well it’s your idea for fun or
what?!” I try to break my boring joke. Unexpectedly they’re laughing too. We
spent time for a year there before coming back robbing store. 1956, here we
go!