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Infant Mental Health Journal, Vol. 18(3) 324 – 326 (1997)

© 1997 Michigan Association for Infant Mental Health CCC 0163-9641/97/030324-03

Book Review

EARLY CHILDHOOD PARENTING SKILLS: A PROGRAM MANUAL FOR

THE MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONAL. By Richard R. Abidin (with selected
chapters by Suzanne Button), Psychological Assessment Resources, 1996, 340 pages plus
139-page parents’ workbook

Reviewed by: Martha Farrell Erickson

A popular poster promoting parent education classes shows a crying baby with the tag
line, “They don’t come with instructions!” Certainly there are many times in the lives of
most parents when they wish that their children did come with clear and simple how-to
instructions. And yet, the idea of teaching people how to care for their children also raises
hackles. After all, how do you teach what is supposed to be instinctive? And who would
dare to invade the privacy of home and family to tell parents what they ought to do with
their own children? And, given the importance of culture and context, what approach to
parenting would you ever decide to teach?
It is with those concerns in mind that Richard Abidin set out to write a manual for par-
ent educators that does not suggest “a right way” to parent, but rather aims to support par-
ents as they develop the “insight and skills necessary to reach their own parenting goals”
(p. vi). This is an ambitious project, but the author does it well.
Using a thoughtfully eclectic approach, Abidin draws on the wisdom of four schools of
psychological thought: self-concept theory, relationship and humanistic communications,
behavioral principles, and cognitive psychology. The 340-page manual for professionals,
and the accompanying 139-page workbook for parents encompass information gleaned
from an extensive review of professional literature, discussions with hundreds of parents,
interviews with 50 child development experts, and the author’s many years of clinical ex-
perience with parents and young children. The book is written for a multidisciplinary
audience of professionals who already have substantive academic background, strong in-
terpersonal skills, and respect for the strengths and value of parents and children.
Although the four-part manual is highly structured with specific, concrete suggestions
for group exercises and discussion, it is designed for flexible use in a variety of set-
tings and circumstances. Section I includes background information on how to use
the manual, a chapter on how to adapt the information to special family circumstances
(e.g., adoptive, single-parent, and gay and lesbian families), and a brief but helpful
chapter on how to evaluate parent education programs. Kudos to Abidin for including
evaluation right up front. He offers a clear discussion of issues and principles of evalua-
tion, as well as practical tips on measures and approaches for measuring short- and long-
term goals.
Section II of the manual includes the 19 sessions that form the core of the program,
broadly divided into topics that address the child’s developing self-concept, building a

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Book Review 325

strong parent – child relationship, managing child behavior, and managing parents’ feel-
ings. For each session, the manual sets out a research-based introduction to the topic,
learning objectives for the session, a list of materials and a suggested sequence of activi-
ties. The book then follows a fairly specific script for reviewing the previous session’s
home practice activity, the day’s lecture/discussion (the bulk of the session), a general
open discussion, and directions for the upcoming week’s home practice activities (spelled
out for parents in their workbook). Throughout are realistic examples of parent-child situ-
ations for the parents to analyze and discuss.
Section III includes five single-session lecture/workshop presentations intended for
community groups or as supplements to the core program. These include such topics as
helping your child with homework, communicating with teachers, special education and
legal rights, and using social support. Finally, Section IV is an annotated bibliography for
parents, which covers a wide range of general parenting topics and special situations —
for a surprisingly wide range of ages (e.g., “ages 13 and older”), especially considering
that the book is billed as being about “early childhood.” Note that this same annotated
bibliography appears in the parents’ handbook. In addition, each chapter in the educator’s
manual includes a list of recommended books and articles for further professional
reading.
In general, this manual is filled with ideas and information that will be useful to pro-
fessionals and parents. The program is grounded in research — nicely synthesized in
special chapters by Suzanne Button and in the brief introductory material for each les-
son or presentation — and in the practical wisdom of people who have lived and worked
with children. Abidin’s approach to parent education strikes a balance between support
and advice, respecting the parents’ rights to decide what they want for themselves and
their children and yet offering concrete suggestions for how they might get there. The
material reflects a good understanding of the many factors that affect a parent’s feelings
and behavior, including the parent’s own childhood history. The clear message through-
out is that learning is lifelong and that parents do not have to repeat or continue mis-
takes of the past.
On a cautionary note, the program as described in the manual does have a heavy em-
phasis on reading and writing and a “classroom” kind of style to the sessions that will not
be appropriate for all parents. Likewise, the home practice activities in the parents’ work-
book definitely feel like homework, leaning toward written exercises and extensive chart-
ing of child behavior. Although the author encourages flexible use and adaptation of the
program to various situations, much would be left to the user in adapting the sessions to
parents who are not comfortable with a verbally loaded approach. The concrete, interac-
tive exercises described in some of the sessions are valuable (e.g., parents are asked to
look into the mirror and imagine themselves “telling” their children different things with
their faces). But there are just not enough of these activities to offset the heavy discus-
sion/analysis orientation of the overall program.
Potential users of the manual also should note that the title is somewhat misleading in
its emphasis on “early childhood.” Most of the material in the book focuses on parent-
ing issues with children who are at least 3 – 4 years of age and have well-developed lan-
guage skills. There is only one brief section about infant – toddler development (a single-
session presentation on development from birth to 48 months, Section III), and the
vast majority of practical examples throughout the book deal with much older children
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326 Infant Mental Health Journal

(e.g., homework issues, children helping with household chores, and arguments with
classmates). Certainly it is important to begin early in helping parents develop a frame-
work and philosophy that will guide them as their children get older. However, there is
little in this manual that will help parents of infants and toddlers in the here and now. The
greatest value of the manual will be for professionals who work with parents of
preschoolers and early school-age children.