Charles Forsmani am “ot okay with thisFantagrapliies Books Ine. 7863 Lake City Way NE Seattle, Washington, 98115 EDITOR AND ASSOCIATE PUBLISHER: Eric Reynolds 200k oesiGn: Sean David Williams with Charles Forsman propucTion: Paul Baresh Pupuisher. Gary Groth Lam Not Okay with Thisis copyright © 2017 Charles Forsman. (his edition is copyright 2017 Fantagraphics Books Ine. Permission to reproduce content nust be obtained from the author or publisher. All rights reserved, ISBN 978-1-68396-062.1 Library of Congress Control Number: 17938235 www.fantagraphies.com charlesforsman.com FIRST PRINTING: October 2017 Printed in China Read more FREE comics on ReadComicOnlinei am zot okay with this Charles Forsman seattleHotComic.netDEAR DIARY, GO FUCK YOURSELF. BUT 1 CAN ABSOLUTELY NOT! JUST USE Tee ReNGS EWAN XC PAY PHONES DISTRACTING FOR YOUR TEENAGED MIND. JK. T DON'T KNOW WHAT TO WRITE IN THIS STUPID THING, WHAT AMT EVEN) (ANYTHING AND MS. CAPPRIOTTI MADE. ME PROMISE TO DO THIS.SHE SAID IT MIGHT MELP WITH MY MOODS. I CAN LOSE MY TEMPER SOMETIMES. THINK OF (T LIKE YOU ARE TALKING To YOURSELF. AND NO ONE WILL EVER READ tv BUT YOU. SWE'S PRETTY ALRIGHT FOR A GUIDANCE COUNSELOR, I GLESS, EVEN IF SHE DOES SMELL LIKE AN OLD HIPPIE. WELE, THANKS. J SN PLEASURE SYONEY GREAT DAYKinsI PRETTY MUCH HATE SCHOOL. EXCEPT FOR LUNCH AND STUDY MALL. LOL. I JUST HATE BEING STUCK HERE ALL DAY WITH ALL THESE JOCKS AND JUNK. \T's EXHAUSTING. ENGLISH CLASS IS OKAY. MRS. WOYCIK IS REALLY NICE TO ME. SHE THINKS ALL MW CREATIVE WRITING ASSIGNMENTS ARE GENIUS OR. SOMETHING.1 LIVE WITH MY MOM AND LITTLE BROTHER. MOM AND ME HAVEN'T BEEN GETTING ALONG LATELY. TO BE HONEST, MOM {S_KIND OF A BITCH. SHE REALLY JUST ANNOYS THE CRAP OUT OF ME. 10BADASS. MY BEST FRIEND IS DINA. SHE'S A SENIOR AND IS SO ‘SS, ry] i BRADS HER CURRENT BOYTOY. UH, DINA, YER GIRLFRIEND ‘Ss Tal | | ANY . 4 “a Read more FREE comics on ReadComicOnlineBRAD 1S ALWAYS TEASING M A DYKE. SO WHAT IF 1 AM?! DIDIA_LISTEN TO THAT)/ YES! ITS 50) (WHAT'S ee | New BLOODWITCH ! PMS. MUSIC? 7- ALBUM T SENT You? asc HE CALLS Me A BEANPOLE AND WHAT T DO KNOW IS THAT I CAN GET OFF THINKING ABOUT] GUYS AND GIRLS,THERE \'S ONE THING ABOUT I CAN MAKE PEOPLE HURT. ME THAT ISN'T SO BASIC. LIKE IN THEIK HEADS.T DO IT WITH MY MIND SOMEHOW. \T’S TOTALLY FUCKED. To ME?! \WeAT'S NO PICNIC FOR ME, EITHER. T GET ALL SWEATY AND ANXIOUS AND SOMETIMES IT PUKE MY GUTS OUT.-9- , yay ( png, yy e e 1 ROAM B ete ala AsDEAR DIARY, I'M STRAIGHT-UP DISGUSTING. 1 STARTED GETTING ALL THESE ZITS ON MY THIGHS. SO GROSS.Y I'VE TRIED ZIT CREAM AND MOM'S SOAPS AND JUNK. THEY AREN'T EVEN THAT FUN TO POR 3 IT'S PROBABLY PUBERTY OR SOMETHING. a NOTHING SEEMS TO HELPLIAM, HOW SYDNEY? WAS SCHOOL? HORRIBLE AS USUAL, MOTHER. HE GOT SENT OFFICE. SAYS TEENAGERS WAVE TO STUDY HARD IF THEY,SYPNEY! Gc) DON'T TALK CANT WE JUST TO HIM Ll. HAVE ONE MEAL WITHOUT YOU BEING NASTY? IF YOUR FATHER COULD HEAR YOU. IF DAD_WASNT DEAD HE'D DO WHAT EXACTLY?! SPANK ME?! LIKE A BAD LITTLE GIRL?!Read more FREE comics on ReadComicOnlineSOMETIMES AT NIGHT T MASTURBATE BUT I HAVE TO BE REAL QUIET BECAUSE WE WAVE SUPER THIN WALLS, "VE GOTTEN GOOD AT BEING QUIET I CAN'T GO ALL THE WAN, THOUGH. Al FOR SOME REASON IF I GO YOO FAR MY POWERS KICK IN AND T KINDA BLACK OUT.IT KINDA SUCKS, > Z & 9 I 9 a y § 5 a 2 Ww 3 < ¥ I THINK YOu SHOULDI GUESS I SHOULD TELL YOU ABOUT MY DAD, HE'S GONE. DEAD. 1 KEEP HIS DOG TAGS AROUND MY NECK. IT IRRITATES MY SKIN, THE METAL SMELLS LIKE HIM.ONE TIME I ALMOST LOST T LOVED MY DAD You KNOW? IT SWIMMING AT THE BLUE 1 MEAN, MOST KIDS Di BREECHES. BUT DAD REALLY GOT Me. DAD WAS OFF IN HIS HEAD A LOT BUT HE WAS ALWAYS REAL COOL TO ME. 50HIS TRUCK ALWAYS SMELLED LIKE A SKUNK TO ME. 1 WOULD ALWAYS ASK HIM ABOUT, BUT HE WOULD JUST LAUGH AT ME. Now I KNOW MY DAD WAS PROBABLY A POT-HEALT FIGURED THAT OUT LAST SUMMER. DINA AND ME WENT TOA PARTY AT RICKY BERRY'S A BUNCH OF SENIORS WERE GETTING HIGH IN THE SHED.THEY GOT DINA REALLY HIG, THOUGH. TWAS YOO SCARED TO TRY. ° SHE ENDED UP MAKING OUT WITH RICKY UNDER THE DINING BOARD.ANYWAYS -- I THINK DAD SMOKED TO CALM DOWN. PAD ALANS | SEEMED To BE ANNOY HE WASN'T MAD AT US OR MOM, IT'S ALMOST LIKE HE WAS FIGHTING WITH HIMSELF,DAD WAS IN IRAQ WHEN I WAS LITTLE. IT PROBABLY MESSED His BRAINS UP T NEVER ASKED HIM IF HE KILLED ANYGODY. 1 HATE! HATE! HATE? THAT HE WENT THERE. HOW COULD HE LEAVE ME AND MoM LIKE THAT. IF ONLY HE KNEW HOW MUCH HE MADE HER CRY.ONE NIGHT I FOUND HIM IN HE LOOKED CRAZY. CURLED THE BASEMENT. UP IN A BALL AND CRYING. IT REALLY SUCKED TQ SEE I STILL SEE HIM SOMETIMES DAD LIKE THAT. WHEN I CLOSE MY EYES. Read more FREE comics on ReadComicOnlineHE WAS IN SO MUCH PAIN. HE PLEADED WITH ME TO MAKE IT STOR T COULD HEAR HIM EVEN HE WAS LIKE ME, AND HE KNEl THOUGH HIS MOUTH WASN'T HOW HE KNEW T MIGHT MOVING.HE TOLD ME HOW TO bo IT. Ts HARD TO EXPLAIN. I WOULDN'T KNOW THE WORDS. I DID IT. I DID tT FOR HIM, BUT T MISS HIM. 1 SET HIM FREE. 1 MISS HIM SO MUCH.TONIGHT I WAS HANGING OUT WITH A BUNCH OF BOYS IN THE PARKING LOT BEHIND MARCO'S PIZZA, THEY ARE A FEW GRADES ABOVE ME,THE GROUND THERE 'S JUST T COULD FEEL THE THEM A THIcK LAYER OF STONES,| | SHIFT AND CRUNCH UNDER MY FEET. Ditae : e T WAS THERE WITH STANLEY MOST PEOPLE CALL HIM GOOB. BARBER, HE LIVES JUST IVE KNOWN HIM SINCE WE WERE DOWN “THE BLOCK FROM ME.| | IDS.7 STILL CALL HIM STAN.WE HAVEN'T HUNG OUT IN A WHILE BUT EVER SINCE THINGS GOT WEIRD WITH ME ANDO DINA, LT THINK STAN KIND OF HAS A CRUSH ON ME. ANYWAYS, WE WENT TO THE 1 WATE FOOTBALL BUT THE FOOTBALL GAME TONIGHT WHOLE TOWN GOES. WE MET UP WITH STAN'S STONER FRIENDS,MANGE ‘FRIENDS’ ISN'T THE RIGHT WORD THEY IND OF ARE JUST ALWAYS LAUGHING AT HIM. I DON'T THINK STAN GETS. THAT HE 1S THE JOKE. we THEY KEPT ASKING HIM TO DO WEIRD SHIT.THE SHAGS FOUND OUT STANLEY HAD SOME POT SO THAT'S HOW WE ENDED UP IN THE PARKING LOT, I'D NEVER DONE IT BEFORE, I GUESS 1 WAS AFRAID OF MYSELEWy =. & ®S) 8 = vo szhk dy gv oF 98 >MY EVES FELT HEAVY AND my T TOOK ANOTHER HIT, SHOULDERS RELAXED.I JUST SMOKED SOME MORE. T FEEL LIGHT FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVER. AND T HAVE A FEELING THAT WHEN IT CLOSE My EVES TONIGHT,,.. Ge ee «THAT T WON'T SEE DAD HIDING BEHIND MV EYELIDS, /SO I FUCKED STAN. HE KEPT IT WAS SO SWEET WHEN HE HOOKING ME UP WITH WEED. OLD ME THAT. IT WASN'T A PLUS, YOU KNOW, VIRGIN, BIG DEAL To ME. IT WAS A LITTLE TRICKY, HE ALSO KEPT SWEATING ON (ANS THING WOULDN'T STAY ME BUT IT WAS FUN, HARD. MUST'VE BEEN NERVOUS.MY FAVORITE PART WAS WHEN HE WENT DOWN ON ME. HE WAS GOOD AT IT. STAN MUST'VE DONE HIS HOMEWORK AFTERWARD WE GOT HIGH AND WATCHED A SCARY MOVIE FROM. HIS BROTHER'S TAPE COLLECTION.SOMETIMES MOM GClvES US A FEW BUCKS TO EAT DINNER AT UNI-MART. WE ALWAYS GET HOTDOGS.LATELY, THERE'S BEEN A NEW LADY WORKING THE REGISTER SHE SEEMS COOL. NOT LIKE MOST OF THE OTHER TOOTHLESS REDNECKS THEY USUALLY HIRE. SHE ALWAYS GIVES ME PACKS OF CIGARETTES, L DON'T SMOKE. BUT 3 VAKE THEM ANYWAY. = SHE'S GOT PURPLE HAIR THAT WOULD GIVE MY MOM A FIT. TA ooLAST TIME T SAW HER SHE TENDERLY TOUCHED My HAND. \T WAS WEIRD BUT I KINDA LIKED (1.UNI-MART FR /-BORED, EH? HALT REMEMBER GETTING BORED.MY MAOM NAMED ME RIVER BUT DO T LOOK LIKE. ACRIVER?”SHE TOLD ME ABOUT ALL THESE MOPEY BANDS AND BOOKS AND STUFF. SHE SMELLED LIKE MENTHOL AND BALOGNA. T UKED HOW SHE TALKED TO ME. LIKE I WAS JUST A PUNK KID. I HATE WHEN PEOPLE TALK TO ME LIKE THAT. BUT NOT WITH HER. aHER NAME |S RYAN AND SHE KISSED ME ON THE CHEEK. 6RYAN AND [ DID SOME STUFF TODAY. I WENT OVER TO HER APARTMENT AFTER SCHOOL. I'VE NEVER SEEN SUCH A TINY LITTLE PLACE.SHE SAYS JUDY DOESN'T TAKE. ANY SHIT. AND, BOY, DID SHE LAUGH, AND LAUGH, AND LAUGH. 66IT GOT SO WIGH. RIGHT IN THAT SWEET SPOT WHERE 1M REALLY RELAXED AND MY BEAST 15 AT BAY. RYAN SMELLED LIKE POT SHE'S SO COOL AND SHE AND HAIRSPRAY. KNows IT. SST,SS £: he SSI COULD HAVE REALLY HURT HER.lasagna Read more FREE comics on ReadComicOnlineT STAYED OUT REALLY LATE TONIGHT. MOM WASN'T HAPPY, WATE TO BRING IT UP BUT OD YOU 78SOMETIMES I WISH -NO-SOMETIMES T THINK WHAT IT WOULD BE LIKE IF MOM DIED INSTEAD OF DAD. slDID YOU N 4 wHo EAT? CAUSE - WERE You TkNow YOU DIDN'T EAT THE DINNER WITH, PINA? 86baby jesusI MISS DINA, THAT BITCH. 89JT HOPE BRAD IS KEEPING HIS NATURAL ASSHOLIC TENDENCIES TO A MINIMUM. (CVn aN ANCIT MAKES ME SICK TO MY STOMACH THI Toe vo INK OF THEM 1 TOLD JORN, (we RE COMING. HE 1S SUCH A MISOGYNIST PIECE OF SHIT. GOD!!! FUUUUUUUUUUUUCK IE T THOUGHT WE COULD MAKE OUR OWN MOVIE,SOMETIMES WHEN I WAS WITH RYAN, T WOULD JUST BE THINKING OF DINA, WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN? GUESS I STILL CARE FOR THE JERK, cs 2 . 5 c A a . . Tm NOY int “™ ae EMO 4 YOU OA.” IV THE Mop”IT GET FLASHES OF HER MAKING OUT WITH BRAD AND IT's GROSS AND REVOLTING, 'S LIKE A FLY BUZZING ARQUND MY HEAD. UGH. ATE HIM. WHY CANT SHE SEE HOW SHITTY HE x SORRY, PRINCESS.IT WAS SQ MUCH BETTER WHEN IT WAS JUST THE TWO OF US, WE HAD SO MUCH FUN. LIKE THAT TIME WE WENT TO ROGK'N BOWL AND FLIRTED WITH THE DJ. WE GOT HIM TO PLAY ‘HOOKED ON A FEELING" LIKE. TWENTY TIMES WHILE WE DANCED, WE ANNOYED THE SHIT OUT OF EVERYONE. IT WAS SO GREAT.UGH. T FEEL KINDA BETTER GETTING ALL THAT OUT.MERRY FUCKING CHRISTMAS, DIARYI HOPE DINA [IS HAVING A GOOD CHRISTMA: STUPID BITC!DAMN! T MISS HER.