AN

GROUP WORK

ON

RCS 324: RELIGION, FAMILY AND KINGSHIP IN AFRICA

WRITTEN

BY

ARCHIBONG, RICHAD EFFIONG - - AK12/ARTS/RCS/004

ASUQUO, EKAETTE EMMANUEL - - AK12/ARTS/RCS/005

ATAKPA, MAGDALENE OFFIONG - - AK12/ARTS/RCS/006

DEPARTMENT: RELGIOUS AND CULTURL STUDIES

FACULTY: ARTS

SUBMITTED

DR G. M. MPIGI

(LECTURER-IN-CHARGE)

JANUARY, 2016
INTRODUCTION

Every African community had ways of regulating the lives of individuals in the society. Though it is a

known fact that, in Africa in antiquity that there were no written law to regulate the lives of the people;

but there were those things that helped the Africans in their day to day lives to live according to the

regulation of the Community. In fact as Udo (1983) states, there were judicial as well as law enforcing

instruments in Ibibio; he mentioned some of the law enforcing instruments as including Mbiam (juju),

Idiong divination), Iman (ally) and “Ukot” (in-law).

In this sense, Ukot is a very strong judicial instrument which helps in regulating the activities of

family members in particular reference to inter-family relationship which may be considered as

marriage. Marriage is the bedrock of any given society; it is a union between a man and a woman as

husband and wife which lasts for life time. Marriage is an important means of forming alliance beyond

one’s own kin group (clan). Marriage transforms relationships and conveys certain rights. These

establish legal parentage of children as well as establishing a social relationship (an affinal relationship

or affinity) between spouses and each other’s relatives (Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia)

In this work, we shall elucidate the concept of In-law ‘Ukot” and it vatious types. We shall go ahead to

discussing the place that of an In-law in a typical traditional Ibibio family as well as its religious

significance. But before we do this, we shall first of all discuss briefly about the Ibibio people whom

which we have used as case study in this work. We shall round it up by adumbrating the various

obligation of an “Ukot” in the family of his/her husband or wife.

A BRIEF DSCIRPTION OF THE IBIBIO

The name Ibibio is coined from the word "Ibio-ibio" means ‘short’ or ‘brief’ and doesn't have

anything to do with "ulok" and while it is called "ufok" by some other Ibibio groups. The name "Ikot"

often replaces "the house of... or the people of ", referring to their origin or ancestors. Another

meaning for Ikot in Ibibio land is bush (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ibibio_people).

The Ibibio-speaking people occupy an area of land in the extreme southeastern corner of Nigeria (Udo

1983: 1). According Encyclopedia Britannica, Ibibio are the people of southeastern Nigeria, mainly in

the Cross River state. They speak dialects of Efik-Ibibio, a language now grouped within the Benue-

Congo branch of the Niger-Congo language family. The Ibibio comprise the following major

divisions: Efik , Northern (Enyong), Southern (Eket), Delta (Andoni-Ibeno), Western (Anang), and

Eastern (the Ibibio proper). The Annang, Efik, Ekid, Oron and Ibeno share personal names, culture,

and traditions with the Ibibio, and speak closely related varieties of Ibibio-Efik

The Ibibio tribe is the 4th largest ethnic set in Nigeria, and barely outnumbered by the Igbo our

neighbor (https://closingdebateonafrica.wordpress.com) Available evidence indicates that the original

homeland of Ibibio is at Usak Edet (Isangele) in the Cameroon. Ibibio society consists of villages,

each of which belongs to a larger unit known as the “Clan.” The clan was often named after the

founder of the first village in the area. Each Ibibio village is independent and equal in status. The

villages consist of individual families comprising the husband, his wife/wives, children and

grandparents. The society is mostly polygamous with formerly large families

(https://closingdebateonafrica.wordpress.com)
MEANING OF IN-LAW “UKOT”

The word “Ukot” has two meanings which are in-law and legs (Udo 1983: 150). “Ukot” in the

connotative sense of In-law signifies that a married person has something that acts like legs between

him, that is, his wife (op cit, 150). In Ibibio, when a person marries or is married into any lineage,

there exists a kind of political, economic and social link (relationship) between the two lineages. That

is to say that there is an automatic tie that exist between the lineage of the groom and that of the bride,

and that gives birth to the notion of “Ukot”(In-law). According to Merriam Webster dictionary, an in-

law is a person you are related to because of your marriage; especially the father or mother of your

husband.

In an oral interview with Dr John Bosco Ekanem, Ekanem postulated an In-law “Ukot” as somebody

who goes out to marry another person; and in this case, if a man goes out to another family to marry he

becomes an in-law “Ukot” to that family and the parents (mother and father) brothers and sisters,

uncles of his wife automatically become his In-laws “Ukot”. Also, his family members also become

the in-laws “Mme Ukot” of his wife’s family. It is worth noting that “Ukot” is not a blood

relationship, it’s not bound by blood ties, but it’s a relationship of affinity; that is to say, when a

person goes out to marry a lady, he is affined to the family of his wife not by blood but by marriage

relationship. This relationship has a law and it is from it that we have “In- law “Ukot” which is usually

an unwritten law binding the in-laws “Ukot”, relationship.

According to Montgomery (1995), relationships with in-laws are a special category within kinship

systems that has not been widely studied. Generally, kin relationships are defined by either blood

(consanguine) ties or marriage (affinal) ties. Blood relationships are bound together by genetic lines,

but relationships based on marriage are bound together by law and a code of conduct that accompanies

them. In-law relationships are unique in that they are defined through a third party by both a marriage

and a blood relationship.

 TYPES OF IN-LAW

To really state clearly the types of in law, we shall divide in-law into Parent-in-law and Sibling-in-law.

PARENTS-IN-LAW

A parent-in-law is a person who has a legal affinity with another by being the parent of the other's

spouse. Many cultures and legal systems impose duties and responsibilities on persons connected by

this relationship. A person is a son-in-law or daughter-in-law to the parents of the spouse, who are in

turn also the parents of those sisters-in-law and brothers-in-law (if any) who are siblings of the spouse

(as opposed to spouses of siblings). Together the members of this family affinity group are called the

in-laws (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parent-in-law). Under the parents-in-law are;

Fathers-in-law: A father-in-law is the father of a person's spouse. Two men who are fathers-in-law to

each other's children may be called co-fathers-in-law, or, if there are grandchildren, co-grandfathers.

Mothers-in-law: A mother-in-law is the mother of a person's spouse. Two women who are mothers-

in-law to each other's children may be called co-mothers-in-law, or, if there are grandchildren, co-

grandmothers. In some cases, the mother-in-law is sometimes shown as the bane of the husband, who

is married to the mother-in-law's daughter.

SIBLING-IN-LAW

Sibling-in-law according to Wikipedia (the free encyclopedia) is a gender-neutral term to refer to a

brother-in-law or sister-in-law (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sibling-in-law). Under this are;’

Brother-In-Law: A brother-in-law (plural brothers-in-law) is the brother of one's spouse or the

husband of one's sibling. According to www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary, it is a brother of a person’s

wife or husband.
Sister-In-Law: A sister-in-law (plural sisters-in-law) is the sister of one's spouse or the wife of one's

sibling. According to www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary, it is the sister of a person’s husband or wife.

Additionally, persons who have siblings who are married will refer to each other as "brother/sister-in-

law" or "co-brother/sister-in-law" since each is the sibling-in-law of the other's spouse.

THE PLACE OF IN-LAW “UKOT” IN IBIBIO

In antiquity where extended family systems were practiced in Ibibio, In-law “Ukot” played a unique

role in so many aspects of the family life. In those days, “Ukot” was given a special place in the

decision making of the family. A clear example of this role could be seen in the area of peace making.

In Ibibio, the in-law “Ukot’ is regarded in fact as the mediator. It was definitely the role of the in-law

to settle dispute in cases where there are misunderstandings and quarrelling. The in-law “Ukot’ is seen

to be a bringer of peace to the family. For instance, if there is a quarrel between a man and his wife,

his brother-in-law can come and quickly settle the problem. In Ibibio, failure to conform to the peace

mission brought by the in-law was seen to contradict the traditional ethics of the Ibibios. So, in any

unsettled issue that the in-law comes to meet; such case was regarded as a settled issue by the

appearance of the in-law.

Furthermore, aside from the peace mission of the in-law; the in-law was regarded to serve as a judge in

conflicting cases. He was believed to be an impartial judge as he would not side any party. The

employment of the In-law in tough cases was aimed to bring free and fair ruling of such case. In this

case, the In-law in this capacity would punish the offender and also praise the deserving party. It is a

big offence in Ibibio land for a recalcitrant party to reject the verdict of an in-law in a case that

disfavors him, especially when so many has bear witness to the prove of such judgment. In a nutshell,

it can be stated here that In-law “Ukot” was indeed considered as a mediator in the Ibibio antiquity.
 RELIGIOUS SIGNIFICANCE OF “UKOT” IN IBIBIO

This link is only significance if only the marriage continues. As Udo opines, this link becomes a bond

and because of this bond members of the man’s family regard members of the wife family as sacred

and so would respect and adore them, and vice versa. In this case, it is a big taboo to harm the in-law

in any way. According to Udo, it is a law that an in-law in must not be killed, nor should anybody who

is member of the wife’s family or village be party to his being killed. This brings us to Ibibio proverb

that says that “Edue Ukot Akpa Itong” meaning literally that “any person committing a crime against

an in-law must surely die”. The above belief and proverb speaks of how in-law is revered in Ibibio

land. It is serious judicial regulation for in-law “Ukot’ o be respected and revered. In those days, one

would refuse to harm a stranger fearing that might be his in-law; even if such a person were to wrong

him, investigation would be carried out before any action is taken.

Moreover, the in-law is believed to bring blessing to a barren or caused land. The coming of an in-law

to the family is believed in Ibibio to be a sign of blessing and growth to that household. Thus, they are

treated in a special manner. He has a say in that family matter and problems as concerning issues of

cause and blessing. In Ibibio, mbiam (juju) cannot harm an in-law “Ukot”. In this case, thre are some

lands have been abandoned because of dispute, may be because an enemy has planted mbiam (juju) in

such land. This kind of land is always referred to as a ‘cause land’ in Ibibio. So, when an in-law on

his or her visit, can enter the land and plant as well as harvesting without suffering any harm. In this

case, the in-law is regarded to bring blessing to the ‘cause land’.

In some cases, if a person is suffering from a deadly pestilence, it was believed that the arrival of the

In-law “Ukot” would bring a special remedy to the problem. If not eradicating it; at least to offer a

temporary solution to the problem. That is the reason in Ibibio an In-law “Ukot” would always seek

for protection or cover in the side of a fellow In-law whenever he’s faced with a deadly challenge or

he’s facing a hard time.

 THE OBLIGATON OF AN IN-LAW IN THE FAMILY

In Ibibio, much is expected of the son-in-law “Ebe Eyen” in the family. Especially, in a case where the

son-in-law is well to do; the wife’s family automatically sees him as their savior and thereby expecting

him to provide for all their basic needs. In many of the Ibibio family, the following are considered to

be the obligation for the son-in-law in the wife’s family.

 Providing for the Parents-in-law’s needs: In some poor Ibibio family where the parent-in-

laws are not well to do, especially in the case where they are sick or too old to work; it is

expected of the son-in-law to take good care of them. In this case, the Son-in-law who is

married to a girl in that family has the responsibility of providing food, money, clothes, and

among other basic needs to the incapable In-laws (Ukot). That is the reason why some parents

would borrow something from somebody believing that when their daughter is married that

they will pay such debt. Aside from this, even in a wealthy family, it is expected of the son-in-

law to be contributing at least in the up-keep of his In-law’s family; this is the more reason

why rich men do not give out their daughter to humble or average men in marriage, because

they believe that he may not be able contribute to the family.

 Settling of Issues among the brothers or sisters-in-law: Just as it was earlier opined, the in-

law “Ukot” plays the role of an intermediary in the In-law’s or “Ukot’s” family. For instance,

if a man marries to a family in which his wife is the first child or daughter of the family, the

man definitely has a role to play in her in-law’s family in the sense that it is his duty to join

forces with his wife to restore peace in her family in the case of conflict. For example, if two of

the man’s brother-In-laws are quarreling, it is the responsibility of the man to call them to

order. Considering his place in the family, the son-in-law as was stated before is always

respected by his sibling-in-law.

  Playing a major role in the Burial of the Parents-in-law: When the father-in-law or the

mother-in-law dies, it is the responsibility of the son-in-law to join hands with his parents-in-

law family to give his father or mother-in-law a befitting burial ceremony. He does this by

giving a helping hand to his in-laws; that is why the family of the wife invites in-laws because

it is the responsibility of the in-law to do just that. In the traditional Ibibio family, the daughter

of the deceased will go to the husband’s family and sings, women from her husband side will

join her in singing during the funeral.

 Taking care of the sisters and brother’s in-law: It is also expected of an in-law to impact

lives in the family of his wife. In this case, in a situation where the wife’s siblings are small; it

is expected of the son-in-law to take in those children and take care of them. This usually

brings problems to many African families as the Parents-in-law would do everything to

manipulate the son-in-law to pump in resources into the family. In some cases, the son-in-law

is always in the dilemma of trying to please his wife and her family, and trying to devise means

of taking care of other pressing needs.

In the other hand, a daughter in-law also has a role to play in the family of her husband. In Ibibio, a

woman who is married into a particular family is believed to be married to all the men in the family. In

this case, the daughter-in-law has the following responsibilities to play in her in-law’s family which is

her new family;

1. Cooking for the family, especially when events call for such

2. Respecting every elderly and young person as refusal to do this will attract hate and

discrimination form her in-law

3. Marrying any of her In-laws in case of her husband death.

FACTORS THAT CAN BREAK THE BOND OF IN-LAW-SHIP “UKOT” IN IBIBIO

1. Infidelity on the part of the wife: As Udo (175) opines, in Ibibioland if a father had a number

of his daughters married to different men, and these ran away from their husbands, the man

would refund the large amount of money to his sons-in-law in compensation for the bride price

and other expenses on the daughters. If any amount of money is returned from the father-in-

law to the son-in-law as a result of any problem on the part of the lady; this would

automatically affect or even terminate the bond that binds the In-law relationship. Also, if a

woman is found guilty of committing adultery; she is automatically divorced by the husband

and this breaks the In-law-ship bond.

2. Maltreatment of the wife by the husband: A man who maltreats his wife is believed in

Ibibio to be disrespecting his In-laws. According to Udo, if a man failed to respect his parents-

in-laws, he may be forced to divorce the wife. This practice is continued to this day. This is

because parents-in-law were considered sacred and because the woman belongs to her lineage,

the man was expected to respect his In-law “Ukot” by treating his in-laws well.

3. Misdemeanor on the part of the wife: In Ibibio, the wrong behavior of the son-in-law is

taken into consideration in as much as he can provide for the In-law’s family, but every action

taken by the daughter in-law is evaluated. In this case, daughter-in-law is expected to be all

submissive to her in-laws. According to Udo (180), in Ibibio, offence generally occurs when

there was trouble between a mother-in-law and her daughter-in-law. As Udo notes (189), if a

daughter-in-law insults the Parents-in-law, she will be punished with a fine of a goat.

4. Pre-mature death of the Husband or wife: In Ibibio, pre-mature death is regarded as a cause.

In that case, there is a reason for every death and thus, no death is natural. So if a woman dies

pre-maturely in the matrimonial home, the husband is always held to ransom, because it is

believed the witches and witch craft in his family has killed the woman. In the other hand, it is

more difficult when the man dies. In this case, the woman is given undue treatment by her In-
 laws as a result of her husband’s death. This is because, in Ibibio it is believed that when a man

dies, it is the sin of the woman that is responsible for the death of the husband. So, in this case,

the woman sometimes is sent back to her people because she is believed to have a hand in her

husband’s death.

5. Laziness on the part of the husband or wife: If the husband is lazy (that is, if the man does

not want to work in order to provide for the family), the wife may be retrieved from him so that

she will not to die of starvation. In the other hand, it is so abominable for a woman to be a lazy

type. This is because; in Ibibio the primary aim of marrying a lady is to have her to help in the

family. So, the In-law-ship relationship can be broken in the case where either of the husband

and wife is lazy.

6. Barrenness: This is another factor that breaks the bond of the in-laws relationship. According

to Udo, if a wife did not have any issue within a year or so many years after marriage, the

parents-in-law would abuse her for inability of conceive. In fact, they would even go on to the

extent of abusing the girl’s parents and this cracks the relationship among the In-laws.

CONCLUSION

In antiquity, In-law was a very significance institution that was used in maintaining laws and orders in

the society. Such as it is stated above, the role of the In-law cannot be over-emphasized as it was a key

judicial instrument in the society i.e. the traditional Ibibio society. But, due to the advent of western

culture and tradition, the impact of In-law in the society has since faded away. In fact, it is seen

happening nowadays that In-laws would be suing a fellow In-law to court. It has come to the level that

a Son-In-Law is now threatening the parents-in-law. In the ancient Ibibio community, in-law were

respected; in fact people were conscious of doing any bad thing to strangers because of the believe that

such a stranger may turn out to be an In-law in disguise. This is because, in Ibibio when somebody is

married to a person, the whole community he/she is married automatically becomes his/her In-law.
REFERENCES

1. Oral interview with Dr John Bosco Ekanem on Thursday 28 th of January 2016 at about

01:48pm.

2. Udo, E. (1983), “Who are the Ibibios”, African-Fep Publishers Limited 79 Awka Road PMB

1639 Onitsha, Nigeria

3. Brother –in-law retrieved from www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english/brothers-in-law

4. “Origin and Early History of the Ibibio People of Nigeria” retrieved from

https://closingdebateonafrica.wordpress.com/2013/02/09/origin-and-early-history-of-the-

ibibio-people-of-nigeria/

5. Encyclopedia Britannica, “Ibibio” retrieved from www.britannica.com/topic/Ibibio

6. Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia “Ibibio People” retrieved from

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ibibio_people