- main font too small (but not as much as I initially thought....

the more I look at it the more I think its

just a bit too small but not needing a massive change....maybe go up 2 points or whatever.)
- Patient information section a bit too low? It might look weird being in the middle. Unsure if I like it
as is though even though I dont know what I would do differently.
- snapshots have no indication that it is a snapshot which makes me think of articles in magazines
where they take parts of it and make it larger but its still contained in the main article.....which isnt
what we are doing. Perhaps add an indicator that its a separate piece of info?
- has 2 introductions – we need a name for the welcome page thing.
- I really love the colour scheme. Do you think it would make sense to get them to add even more
colour? Perhaps the lines that outline the snapshots be in that red and have the word snapshot also in
red?
- I like that they were able to take the first sentence from each section and turn that into a blurb at the
start of each section. It wasnt written with that intention so for osme of them it reads nicely as a good
summary intro to the section, but in other times it doesnt act that way and is just them moving the
intitial sentence of the section outside of it and it can be awkward (see section 4 for instance....the
initial blurb doesnt really make a ton of sense, its just the first sentence moved up)
- needs one for conclusion
- have "understanding treatment development" inforgraphic mixed up with "clinical trial process"
infographic
- need some sort of indicator that the text below infographics are connected to infographic and not the
rest of the text (see stats example at the start of section 5)
-I like the bar graphs, nice, simple, clean
- in understanding cancer treatment section I feel like they should also have the information contained
in the brackets also coloured – for instance "duration of response (DOR" should all be coloured. Right
now its just "duration of response" and the (DOR) is left black.
- the infographic showing progression, stable disease, etc is still wrong. Ill have to really explain that
one to them.
-not sure how I feel about the last page....the more I look at it the more I like it but it still feels ... weird.
- the graph on page 27 I feel like standard of care should be on 2 lines to create more space between the
title of each bar so its very clear.
- regarding the same graph and elsewhere, the numbers with circles around them the circles dont look
centred for many of them.
- They havent created the outline for the treatment page which could be an issue because the way its
currently looking they have done the text portion and also designed the bar graphs, but havent put them
together to make them fit in a single page. I should discuss with them to do this for formatting
purposes.
- They only have 2 examples of treatments in the "understanding treatment information section" and im
not sure if they are intending to have it as that actual giant green box. I am not a fan of that if they are.
- they are also missing an entire page after the examples in the same section
- the "understanding graphical information" section is problematic because they are showing the picture
you did before they are talking about anything to give it context, which makes it very confusing. Need
the first paragraph from that page to be included in or above the picture so that the context is provided
first.
- understanding cancer treatments section has the infographic in the middle of the text explaining
things. This could probably be ok but my preference is to have it complete the discussion of things and
then the infographic follows to cement it in.
- in fact the snapshot is also in the middle of the discussion in this section, which makes me think it is
likely like that in other areas of the report. I am not sure I like the idea of snapshots being in the middle
of the text that its summarizing.
- overall I am really happy actually. I mean there is a ton to fix and adjust and maybe even some
rewrites etc.....but the look of it is really really good I think. In my opinion they nailed it on the
appearance re: professional but not too professional.