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Travis Bradberry
President at TalentSmart & coauthor Emotional Intelligence 2.0 2 Beiträge 20.544 Follower Folgen

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9 Things Successful People Won't Do
9 Things Successful People
Won't Do
August 18, 2014  33.642  717  89
18. August 2014

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How Successful People Stay
Calm
5. August 2014
My last post, How Successful People Stay Calm, really
Alle anzeigen
struck a nerve (it's already approaching 1.5 million reads
here on LinkedIn). The trick is that managing your emotions
is as much about what you won’t do as it is about what you
will do. Top-Beiträge

Heute Diese Woche Alle

TalentSmart has tested more than a million people and found
that the upper echelons of top performance are filled with Avinash Anantha Murthy
people who are high in emotional intelligence (90% of top performers, to be exact). So, I went 4 Marketing lessons to learn
back to the data to uncover the kinds of things that emotionally intelligent people are careful to from the ALS "Ice Bucket
avoid in order to keep themselves calm, content, and in control. They consciously avoid these Challenge"
behaviors because they are tempting and easy to fall into if one isn’t careful. 223.171 Ansichten

While the list that follows isn’t exhaustive, it presents nine key things that you can avoid in Victoria Pynchon
order to increase your emotional intelligence and performance. If Maggie Gyllenhaal Can Cry at
Work, You Can Too
They Won’t Let Anyone Limit Their Joy 43.903 Ansichten

When your sense of pleasure and satisfaction are derived from comparing yourself to others, Cachet Prescott, PHR
you are no longer the master of your own happiness. When emotionally intelligent people feel Why Your Résumé Won’t Get
good about something that they’ve done, they won’t let anyone’s opinions or accomplishments You the Job (But May Get You
take that away from them. Noticed)
40.068 Ansichten
While it’s impossible to turn off your reactions to what others think of you, you don’t have to
compare yourself to others, and you can always take people’s opinions with a grain of salt. Tom Scearce
That way, no matter what other people are thinking or doing, your self-worth comes from Judging the Ice Bucket
within. Regardless of what people think of you at any particular moment, one thing is certain— Challenge
36.553 Ansichten
you’re never as good or bad as they say you are.

They Won’t Forget Travis Bradberry

9 Things Successful People
Emotionally intelligent people are quick to forgive, but that doesn’t mean that they forget. Won't Do
Forgiveness requires letting go of what’s happened so that you can move on. It doesn’t mean 33.642 Ansichten
you’ll give a wrongdoer another chance. Emotionally intelligent people are unwilling to be
bogged down unnecessarily by others’ mistakes, so they let them go quickly and are assertive Weitere anzeigen
in protecting themselves from future harm.

They Won’t Die in the Fight

Emotionally intelligent people know how important it is to live to fight another day. In conflict,
unchecked emotion makes you dig your heels in and fight the kind of battle that can leave you
severely damaged. When you read and respond to your emotions, you’re able to choose your
battles wisely and only stand your ground when the time is right.

They Won’t Prioritize Perfection

Emotionally intelligent people won’t set perfection as their target because they know it doesn’t
exist. Human beings, by our very nature, are fallible. When perfection is your goal, you’re
always left with a nagging sense of failure, and you end up spending your time lamenting what

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you failed to accomplish and what you should have done differently instead of enjoying what Anzeigen, die Sie vielleicht interessant
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They Won’t Live in the Past Mid-Career, 17-month program to
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Failure can erode your self-confidence and make it hard to believe you’ll achieve a better Learn More.
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something that isn’t easy. Emotionally intelligent people know that success lies in their ability Become a Glass Explorer today.
to rise in the face of failure, and they can’t do this when they’re living in the past. Anything ›
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They Won’t Dwell on Problems Trial.

Personen mit ähnlichem Profil wie

Where you focus your attention determines your emotional state. When you fixate on the Travis Bradberry
problems that you’re facing, you create and prolong negative emotions and stress, which
hinders performance. When you focus on actions to better yourself and your circumstances,
you create a sense of personal efficacy that produces positive emotions and improves
performance. Emotionally intelligent people won’t dwell on problems because they know
they’re most effective when they focus on solutions. Kenneth Nowack 3.
President, Envisia Learning
They Won’t Hang Around Negative People Vernetzen

Complainers are bad news because they wallow in their problems and fail to focus on
solutions. They want people to join their pity party so that they can feel better about
themselves. People often feel pressure to listen to complainers because they don’t want to be
seen as callous or rude, but there’s a fine line between lending a sympathetic ear and getting
sucked into their negative emotional spiral. You can avoid getting drawn in only by setting
limits and distancing yourself when necessary. Think of it this way: if a person were smoking,
would you sit there all afternoon inhaling the second-hand smoke? You’d distance yourself,
and you should do the same with complainers. A great way to set limits is to ask complainers
how they intend to fix a problem. The complainer will then either quiet down or redirect the
conversation in a productive direction.

They Won’t Hold Grudges

The negative emotions that come with holding onto a grudge are actually a stress response.
Just thinking about the event involved sends your body into fight-or-flight mode. When a threat
is imminent, this reaction is essential to your survival, but when a threat is ancient history,
holding onto that stress wreaks havoc on your body and can have devastating health
consequences over time. In fact, researchers at Emory University have shown that holding
onto stress contributes to high blood pressure and heart disease. Holding onto a grudge
means you’re holding onto stress, and emotionally intelligent people know to avoid this at all
costs. Learning to let go of a grudge will not only make you feel better now but can also
improve your health.

They Won’t Say Yes Unless They Really Want To

Research conducted at the University of California in San Francisco shows that the more
difficulty that you have saying no, the more likely you are to experience stress, burnout, and
even depression. Saying no is indeed a major challenge for most people. “No” is a powerful
word that you should not be afraid to wield. When it’s time to say no, emotionally intelligent
people avoid phrases like “I don’t think I can” or “I’m not certain.” Saying no to a new
commitment honors your existing commitments and gives you the opportunity to successfully
fulfill them.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Travis Bradberry, Ph.D.

Dr. Travis Bradberry is the award-winning co-author of the #1 bestselling book, Emotional
Intelligence 2.0, and the cofounder of TalentSmart, the world's leading provider of emotional
intelligence tests, emotional intelligence training, and emotional intelligence certification,
serving more than 75% of Fortune 500 companies. His bestselling books have been
translated into 25 languages and are available in more than 150 countries. Dr. Bradberry has
written for, or been covered by, Newsweek, BusinessWeek, Fortune, Forbes, Fast Company,
Inc., USA Today, The Wall Street Journal, The Washington Post, and The Harvard Business
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Nicholas MacDonald
Manager at Kingstone Capital Partners
Another important one - avoiding envy. As Warren Buffett once said about envy, "It's the worst
of the deadly sins- it makes you feel awful and the other guy doesn't feel a thing. At least you
can enjoy gluttony." Envy got me down for years, and I watch it eat away at many people I
know- and ironically, the people who are the most envious are often those who have the most to
be envied. I know a beautiful woman with a good education, a good family with few fiscal
worries, and a loving husband... who worries herself sick envying her friends and colleagues
who work for better companies and married richer men. Meanwhile, she doesn't even see how
much other women envy HER- her looks, her social status, her marriage, her fiscal resources.
It's simply insane.

Few things will hurt you more than envy, and few things are more self-inflicted. Let it go. Just let
it go. If you need a sin, try a little gluttony or lust, within reason. Both tend to be fairly easily
sated compared to envy. Just avoid it at all costs.
Gefällt mir(31) Antworten (3) vor 52 Minuten

 Lisa Seale, Mike Tang, Tina Levy und 28 weitere

 3 Antworten

Philip Schram
Restaurant Franchise Development at Buffalo Wings & Rings
Agree completely. Actually, I prefer to be around people more succesful than me,
at the minimum I can learn from the Masters. However, unfortunately envy and
jalousy are deseases difficult to control.
Gefällt mir vor 2 Minuten

Leisa Perch
Development Specialist & Researcher on Socio-Environmental Issues
Well said, Nicholas. Very well said!
Gefällt mir(1) vor 19 Minuten

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 Patricia (Trish) Fowler

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Sean O'Leary
Director of Communications
"They Won’t Prioritize Perfection"

Amen, I remember when Steve Jobs told his staff, "Eh, just make it okay."
Gefällt mir(29) Antworten (4) vor 58 Minuten

 Ahmed A. Azim Ahmed, Tomasz Prusinski, AMIM, ARM, Cheryl Duffy und 26 weitere

 4 Antworten

Dan Vetter
Sr. Recruiter/Account Manager , CPC. WSi Healthcare Personnel.
Healthcare Staffing. Colorado, Arizona, Utah
There is a difference between excellence and perfection. Apple makes excellent
products. They do not make perfect ones. "Eh, just make it okay" is far from either
and the latter remains a self-defeating goal - being unrealistic and unattainable.
Gefällt mir vor 12 Minuten

Ryan Osman
SEM Account Manager at Iterate Marketing
I think he meant (and I think you know what he meant) that some people can get
paralyzed by trying to make something perfect and end up with nothing, compared
to creating/doing something great and moving on to the next project. Gotta keep
those feet moving!
Gefällt mir(2) vor 13 Minuten

 Russell McCullough und Cheryl Duffy

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Jose Antonio Marquez Russo

Senior Software Engineer at Twitter
Make lists of what "successful" people do.
Gefällt mir(14) Antworten vor 59 Minuten

 Sharon L., Russell McCullough, Nabila Owens und 11 weitere

Owen Rubel
API Architect / Evangelist, Grails Developer
So what.... you're saying Darth Vader wasn't successful???
Gefällt mir(5) Antworten (1) vor 53 Minuten

 Nicole Amato, Royce McGarry, Julia Testa und 2 weitere

 1 Antwort

Adrian Petty
Senior Systems Administrator at MedAssets
Considering that his empire was built on shaky ground from the start, folks in the
empire couldn't stand him once his true nature came out and it totally collapsed
after his kid put a good whipping on him, I'd say that his "success" was fleeting at
best.
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Jerry Pociask
Author/Life Coach, Faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive, able to leap
tall buildings!
Perhaps the term "successful" is a misnomer? People of great esteem react in this very same manner as
well..IJS
Gefällt mir(5) Antworten vor 58 Minuten

 Talya Coleman, Gajendra Babu, Natalia Rymsza und 2 weitere

Mario Kropf
hotel owner
Absolutely spot on. Don't waste emotional energy on negatives. It is wasteful to be jealous,
resentful, envious, disparaging, complaining ........
Gefällt mir(3) Antworten vor 50 Minuten

 Mark Clemmons , Gajendra Babu und Atlantiscats Mannino

Christine Woodard
National Sales Manager-Contract Division at Harden Furniture, Inc.
Good points to consider and share
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 Hamid Sarraf, Ph.D. und Sagar Pratap Singh

Andrea Ihara
VP Generalist: Sales, Bus Dev, Service and Ops & Certified Corporate Wellness
Specialist - OPEN to new opportunities
Great list and great reminders. The last "They Won’t Say Yes Unless They Really Want To" is
perhaps the most daunting. Want to... need to... should.... or just plain can't - often the
pressure to acquiesce is clear.
Gefällt mir(2) Antworten vor 56 Minuten

 Leisa Perch und Hamid Sarraf, Ph.D.

Michael Wolf
Operations manager | Customer Service | Business Process improvement | multilingual
| open to new opportunities
I wonder how you can't forget without holding grudge?
Gefällt mir(1) Antworten (1) vor 46 Minuten

 Benjamin Wills

 1 Antwort

Karolien Meersman
Communication, Language and NLP trainer & coach at Healthy Words
Michael, for me it's about letting go... letting go of the negative emotions and
keeping the lesson from the experience. Thanking the other one for a lesson learnt,
and moving on.
Gefällt mir(1) vor 34 Minuten

 Derin Denham

Shirley-Ann Dick
UX designer at Masternaut
This.
Gefällt mir(1) Antworten vor 52 Minuten

 Steven McKnight

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Meri MacGregor
Recruiting-Sales-Customer Experience-Management
Right on target! If more people lived this way, the world would be a much better place!
Great article.
Gefällt mir(1) Antworten vor 46 Minuten

 Atlantiscats Mannino

Paul Huzarski
Quantitative Research Analyst at NASDAQ OMX
They won't read "successful people" habit list articles
Gefällt mir(1) Antworten vor 23 Minuten

 Csaba Skrabák

Hamid Sarraf, Ph.D. 2.

Nano-BioTech Consultant and CEO at BANOMAT, LLC
Travis has well-summarized key points. In general, it depends on personality and strength of
every individual and how to empower his/her emotional intelligent against un-predicted
circumstances in live and career. For sure, it requires hard working training and practice.
Gefällt mir(1) Antworten vor 55 Minuten

 Caroline Wood

Stacy Barroso
National Executive/Technical Recruiter
Great Article! I recommend taking a few minutes to read.
Gefällt mir(1) Antworten vor 18 Minuten

 Madelyn Van Zyl

Maurice Sasseville
Inside Sales Account Manager at Softchoice
This sounds a lot more like a list of things content people do as opposed to successful ones.
I've know a flurry of successful people who were petty, vindictive, spiteful and negative...but in a
work environment, they were extremely successful because they had their defects goad them
and drive them to success. That being said, they were unhappy people who more or less lived
for their jobs. I would be intrigued to know how many of the current Fortune 500 CEOs fit this
mold you have set...I would venture to guess that few do.
Gefällt mir(1) Antworten vor 13 Minuten

 David S. Long

Deepti Jacob
Senior Relationship Manager at Akamai Technologies
And then there are a ton of more things I think successful people do…like the popular adage
goes, ‘successful people don’t do different things, they do things differently.’ I have found that
even a rearrangement in words, either written or spoken, can make a world of difference. You
say the same things, you do the same stuff, just do it differently and the entire perspective
changes and the resultant outcomes changes.
Gefällt mir(1) Antworten vor 13 Minuten

 David S. Long

Bakara Ovietabore
IT Deployment Manager Seeking Projects To Deliver (PRINCE2 Practitioner)
Essesntially successful people are risk adverse
Gefällt mir(1) Antworten vor 49 Minuten

 Todd McDuffie, MBA

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Sagar Pratap Singh

Assistant Manager - Business Development (USA) at Draft n Craft Legal Outsourcing
Pvt. Ltd.
Thank you, Travis.
Gefällt mir Antworten vor 1 Stunde

Chris Rubino
Field Operations Specialist
Thanks for sharing
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Alan Ragueneau
Chief Counsel, MEU Categories, Global For Coffee Category at Mondelēz International
So true!
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