Academic English Coursebook Winter 2018

SCHOOL OF EDUCATION
EDUC 1016 and EDUC 2003
Academic English
Levels 1 and 2
Winter School 2018
SCHOOL OF EDUCATION
The University of Adelaide
Level 8, 10 Pulteney Street
SA 5005
Telephone +61 8 8313 0694
The University wishes to acknowledge the Kaurna
people, the original custodians of the Adelaide Plains
and the land on which the University of Adelaide's
campuses at North Terrace, Waite, Thebarton and
Roseworthy are built.
Academic English 1016 and 2003
Program Overview
An overview of program objectives, curriculum and activities
Contents
Welcome
The Academic English course and the University of
Adelaide's graduate skills attributes
Academic learning resources
Referencing
Assessment tasks
Weekly overview
3
Contents
Program Overview
Assessment tasks and rubrics
Week 1
Reading effectively
Reading critically
Brackets exercise
Note taking
Keeping track of reference details
Essay writing
Example essays
Commas and full stops
Writing complete sentences
Library research skills (online)
Teamwork
Quotation marks
Apostrophes
Essay topics and group presentations
Week 2
Academic honesty and referencing
APA referencing guide
Plagiarism and how to avoid it
Colons and semicolons exercise
Writing a literature review
Essay planning
Em dashes, en dashes and hyphens
APA referencing questions
Academic oral presentation skills
Week 3
Evidence to support your argument
Organising your argument
Using quotations and secondary sources
Reporting verbs
Introductions and conclusions
Paragraph structure
Week 4
Incorporating your own voice
Coherence and cohesion in writing
Editing and proofreading (online)
Punctuation websites
Dictionaries
4
Welcome
Objectives of the course

The overall objectives of the Academic English course are to prepare you for writing and
presenting in English at university in Australia, to help you meet the demands of
undergraduate or postgraduate studies.
Course learning outcomes

1. Prepare and deliver a range of academic texts (essay and oral presentation).
2. Acquire skills in the genre of academic writing, including: structuring at macro and micro
levels; working with primary and secondary sources; developing an argument; and using
register, audience and authorial voice.
3. Develop research skills relevant to the analysis of primary and secondary sources.
4. Develop and practise skills in referencing, quoting, paraphrasing and avoiding plagiarism.
5. Prepare and deliver coherent and logically argued material in both written and oral forms.
Presentation and workshop

A major focus of the Academic English course is an academic presentation and workshop
to be presented by you in collaboration with the other students in the program. The
presentations and workshops will mostly be held in the final week of the program.
5
Graduate skills attributes
The University of Adelaide’s graduate skills attributes provide a framework for the
curriculum design and implementation of the Academic English course. The attributes and
corresponding course components are outlined below:
Graduate attribute Course component
The essays assigned in this course give the

opportunity to explore one aspect of
1. Deep discipline knowledge
academic writing in detail and to
communicate individual findings to class
members.
These abilities underpin all the activities

2. Critical thinking and problem associated with writing your essay and
solving preparing your presentation and workshop
for the last week.
These skills are particularly important in the

3. Teamwork and communication collaboration involved in many aspects of
skills the course, including your group
presentation and workshop.
Awareness of these issues will be

4. Career and leadership readiness developed through the experiential aspects
of the course, in relation to both general and
academic skills development.
5. Intercultural and ethical The essay topics in this course are based on
competency an awareness of differing academic cultures.
These abilities are required in many of the

tasks and activities associated with
6. Self-awareness and emotional
conducting an academic workshop for your
intelligence
peers, and reviewing your research skills
and academic skills development.
6
Academic learning resources
The webpages below provide links to student academic learning resources information.
www.adelaide.edu.au/writingcentre/
www.adelaide.edu.au/mathslearning/
7
Information about the University of Adelaide Library can be found at
www.adelaide.edu.au/library.
Subject Resource Guides provide useful information and links to resources for your
individual subject area.
You can also link to information on how to use the EndNote referencing program.
8
Referencing
The picture below shows the Writing Centre's page on Referencing Guides for academic
assignments.
http://www.adelaide.edu.au/writingcentre/referencing_guides/
Note: A copy of the Writing Centre's APA Referencing Guide is included in this handbook.
There are many referencing styles, but we will use APA during the course because it is
easy to find online resources to help you use it correctly.
Other important information can also be found on the Writing Centre's Avoiding Plagiarism
page.
9
Assessment tasks
Throughout the course there are a number of different activities for you to complete. Some
of these activities involve preparation for forthcoming in-class sessions.
Assessment Task Task Type Due Date Weight Learning

Outcomes
Online grammar test Sunday
(sentence fragments, Formative midnight 5% 2
subject/verb agreement) Week 1
Sunday
Online academic honesty
Formative midnight 5% 4
quiz
Week 2
Sunday
Online punctuation quiz Formative midnight 5% 2
Week 2
Essay plan (700-1000
words and at least 3
sources for level I Thursday
students; 800-1200 Formative midnight 20% 1, 2, 3, 4, 5,
words and at least 5 Week 3
sources for level II
students)
Final essay
ENGL1110 – 1500 words Sunday
ENGL2110 – 2000 words midnight
Summative 40% 1, 2, 3, 4, 5,
(word count includes in-text end of
references and final Week 4
reference list)
Oral presentation and In class
Summative 20% 1, 2, 3, 4, 5,
workshop Week 4
Up to 5% is also awarded for participation in seminars/tutorials.
Late submissions
The quizzes do not allow late submissions.

There is a penalty of 2 marks per day for late submissions
There is a penalty of 2 marks per day after any extension; and
a mark of zero 7 days after the due date and any extension.
If you have special circumstances that account for late submission, you should send an
Application for Assessment Extension form to the course coordinator before the due date
of the assignment. This form must contain the appropriate signatures.
https://www.adelaide.edu.au/policies/3303/?dsn=policy.document;field=data;id=7446;m=vi
ew
An excellent resource to help you plan your time is the assignment planning calculator on
Massey University’s OWLL website:
http://owll.massey.ac.nz/academic-writing/assignment-planning-calculator.php
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Assessment task rubrics
(on the following pages)
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Essay plan rubric
Academic English 1 students – 700-1000 words total, including at least 3 references
Academic English 2 students – 800-1200 words total, including at least 5 references
IAP students – 700-1000 words total, including at least 3 references
Learning Objective well met Objective partially Objective not met Total
objective met marks
a) Locate relevant Sufficient relevant Sources are not all Student does not
academic sources academic sources are relevant or academic. include references for all
and write in a way included and student Student includes works cited, or includes
which cites correctly, both in references for all references for works
demonstrates the text and in the works cited but omits they have not used.
academic integrity, reference list. some referencing
with accurate details and/or fails to
citation of sources include in-text
used and correct references where
formatting in the appropriate
reference list (6-7 marks) (3-5 marks) (0-2 marks) /7
b) Include a well- Thesis statement is Thesis statement is Thesis statement is not
constructed thesis well constructed and mainly well well constructed and/or
statement and clearly sets out the constructed and/or most topic sentences
related topic parameters of the most topic sentences are not related to the
sentences essay. are related to the thesis statement.
All topic sentences thesis statement.
are related to the
thesis statement.
(4 marks) (2-3 marks) (0-1 marks) /4
c) Ensure that all All the topic Most of the topic The topic sentences do
points made in sentences clearly sentences signal the not signal the points in
each paragraph signal the points in points in their their respective
clearly relate to the each paragraph and respective paragraphs paragraphs and/or there
topic sentence there are no irrelevant and there are few are many irrelevant
points irrelevant points points
d) Write in a Punctuation is Punctuation is Punctuation is very
grammatically accurate and there occasionally inaccurate and there are
correct way with are virtually no inaccurate and/or many grammatical
appropriate grammatical errors there are some errors
punctuation grammatical errors
/20
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Final Essay rubric
Academic English 1 students – 1500 words total, including at least 4 references
Academic English 2 students – 2000 words total, including at least 6 references
IAP students – 1500 words total, including at least 4 references
Learning objective Objective well met Objective partially Objective not met Total
met marks
a) Locate relevant Sufficient relevant Sources are not all Student does not
academic sources and academic sources are relevant or academic. include references for
write in a way which included and student Student includes all works cited, or
demonstrates cites correctly, both in references for all works includes references for
academic integrity, with the text and in the cited but omits some works they have not
accurate citation of reference list. referencing details used.
sources used and/or fails to include
in-text references
where appropriate
(9-10 marks) (5-8 marks) (0-4 marks) /10

b) Critique academic Arguments from other There is some Arguments and
arguments and sources are critiqued evidence of evaluation, evidence from other
evidence, and use and used to support the but it is not built into an sources are not used or
external sources to student’s own argument and external evaluated and/or the
support own argument argument. A variety of sources are not used to student’s own voice is
using a variety of reporting verbs are support the student’s not apparent. Reporting
reporting verbs used and the student’s own argument and/or verbs are not used
voice is clearly heard. the student’s own voice much, if at all.
is not always apparent.
Reporting verbs are
used but with little
variety.

c) Write a well Essay has appropriate Essay has appropriate Essay lacks an
structured essay with overall structure and overall structure but introduction and/or
an introduction, cohesive body body paragraphs lack conclusion
conclusion and paragraphs cohesion
cohesive body
paragraphs (7-8 marks) (4-6 marks) (0-3 marks) /8
d) Write in a Punctuation is accurate Punctuation is Punctuation is very
grammatically correct and there are virtually occasionally inaccurate inaccurate and there
way with appropriate no grammatical errors and/or there are some are many grammatical
punctuation grammatical errors errors

e) Critically reflect on Student does not act on There is limited There is obvious
own and others’ formative feedback to evidence of improvement of the
learning and improve their final draft improvement of final final essay based on
incorporate feedback essay based on formative feedback
into own learning formative feedback
development
/40
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Oral presentation and workshop rubric
COMMENT MARK COMMENT

PRESENTATION CONTENT AND STRUCTURE
A well organised talk with a Poor organisation with little attention
1 0.5 0
clear division between points to detail
Information well explained 1 0.5 0 Information not explained
Relevant information 1 0.5 0 Irrelevant information
Academic style 1 0.5 0 Very informal
References (where included) in References not formatted in APA
1 0.5 0
APA style style
SLIDES
Clear font 1 0.5 0 Font too small or hard to read
Good amount of information on
1 0.5 0 Slides cluttered or empty
slides
Inconsistent bullet points and font
Consistent formatting 1 0.5 0
sizes
PRESENTER
Enthusiastic 1 0.5 0 Seemed bored
Engaging manner 1 0.5 0 Not engaging
Kept to time 1 0.5 0 Presentation too long or too short
Maintained good eye contact
1 0.5 0 Did not look at audience
with audience
WORKSHOP
Participated fully in workshop 2 1 0 Did not participate in workshop
Clear objectives in workshop 1 0.5 0 Unclear objectives in workshop
Clear relationship between No clear relationship between
2 1 0
presentation and workshop presentation and workshop
TEAMWORK
Supported other team members Did not participate as a team
during presentation (where 2 1 0 member during presentation or
appropriate) and workshop workshop
Slide layout and background Slide layout and background not
consistent with other team 1 0.5 0 consistent with other team
members’ slides members’ slides
Total /20
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Week 1
Reading effectively
Reading critically
Brackets exercise
Note taking

Essay writing
Example essays

Library research skills (online)
Teamwork
Quotation marks
Apostrophes
15
16
Reading effectively
Five Point Reading Plan
There are many different ways of reading a text, with different strategies being appropriate
to different purposes. For example, there is no need to read every word when you are looking
for a topic in the index of a textbook. For studying, the most effective approach is to combine
the various reading styles into a five point plan. If you follow this plan, you will find that you
understand your study materials more readily, your comprehension will be more complete,
you will remember more clearly what you have read, and your total reading time will be
reduced.
1. Predict the content of your material, based on the title.
2. Skim the material to get a general idea of what it’s about
3. Scan the material, looking for key words. Check that you
understand what the article is about.
4. Analyse the material. What does it talk about? Is it useful?
5. Note words where necessary. Jot down important points. These

might be single words or short phrases that reflect major ideas or
pieces of information. Write down unfamiliar words that seem
important to the topic.
Predicting enables you to identify key words and check important vocabulary in advance.
Skimming is looking through a text quickly to get a general idea of its contents.
When skimming, don’t get distracted by minor items, however interesting they may seem.
Scanning is looking through a text quickly to retrieve specific information.

When scanning: Make sure you know what item you are looking for.
Disregard anything that is not related to that item.
Check the material systematically.
Analytical reading is reading a text several times in detail in order to understand it

(comprehension), to spot possible faults in it (criticism), or to enjoy more fully what the author
is saying (appreciation). When reading analytically, know what your purpose is and what
information you need from the text.
Noting important information helps you to remember what the article is about.
You can, of course, adapt this five point reading plan to suit your own requirements.
The important point is that reading your material several times at different speeds is more
effective than reading it once very slowly.
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Reading critically
 Establishing an initial point of view in your research
 Developing your point of view as you read
 Surveying the literature
 Keeping track of the referencing details
Establishing an initial point of view in relation to your research topic

Task 1
You are developing the following research topic:
Major infrastructural projects, such as dams, have been hailed as icons of a developed
society. With greater understanding of their impact, are such projects still appropriate?
Discuss in relation to projects currently under construction, such as the Three Gorges Dam
in China.
What is your initial point of view about this topic? Do you know anything about this project?
Why do you think building dams has become controversial? Write down your point of view
which briefly sets out your current response. What evidence do you know at this moment
which could support your claim? Note the evidence down as dot points.
Task 2
Read the following three short texts (A–C). Which text is adapted from an academic paper?
Which text is an extract from an article in a popular magazine? Which text is from the web
pages of the lobby group, the Three Gorges Dam Campaign? What clues have you used to
make your decisions? What are the different types of language used in each text? Why?
Which sources are informative background reading? Which sources can be cited as
appropriate evidence in your essay?
Text A
The Three Gorges Dam will set many records—its 350 mile-long reservoir will be the longest
in the world and will evict more people than any other infrastructure project in history. Close
to 2 million people will have their homes, land, livelihoods and places of worship destroyed
and submerged by reservoir waters. For many in China, the dam symbolises the hubris of
an authoritarian regime that has attempted to silence any criticisms of the $24.5 billion
project. Many serious concerns raised by critics within China and abroad before construction
began in 1994 have come to be ignored along with the spiraling costs, technological
problems, and major resettlement conflicts.
Text B
You know the scene in the Lord of the Rings where the heroes are paddling down the river
and they suddenly lift their eyes to encounter two giant sentinels on either side of a narrow
gorge thrusting high into the overarching sky? Well, the soaring cliffs that form the Three
Gorges—one of China’s greatest natural wonders—are every bit as jaw-dropping. And you
don’t even have to brave the devastating wrath of Lord Sauron to see them. This will change
irrevocably in 2009, when the Three Gorges dam—spanning more than two kilometres and
rising 200 metres above the Yangtze River’s present surface—is completed. To the Chinese
Government, the Three Gorges dam is a triumph of ingenuity that will guarantee continued
18
development along the Yangtze River valley, while curbing floods that claimed thousands of
lives on three occasions last century.
Text C
Resettlement is an environmental issue. The success or failure of the resettlement program
for the Three Gorges Dam will be determined not only by whether relocatees have food,
clothes, shelter, and employment, but also whether the environment can sustain the
incoming population, and whether there are adequate resources available for economic
development. If the relocatee population strains or surpasses the region’s environmental
capacity, the local environment will deteriorate, natural resources will dwindle, and the
standard of living of relocatees will fall. The environmental capacity of the Three Gorges
area is already strained (Wong, 1996), and the relocation of more people to the region will
cause further problems. Major concerns include population pressures, overploughing,
deforestation and soil erosion, and the effects of the project on the rural labour situation.
(Ref: adapted from Chen, G. (1998). The environmental impacts of resources in the
Three Gorges Project. In Qing, D. (main author), J.G. Thibeau & P.B. Williams (eds),
The River Dragon has come! The Three Gorges Dam and the fate of China’s Yangtze
River and its people. New York: ME Sharpe Publishers. pp. 18-24.)
Developing your point of view as you read
Task 3
Now read the following evidence-based extracts from published sources on the topic of the
Three Gorges Dam. As you read, be prepared to change your point of view.
a. Reservoir sedimentation is one of the many environmental problems associated with the
Three Gorges Project in China. The rate and characteristics of sedimentation that directly
affect the operating life of the reservoir are closely related to soil erosion and sediment
transport dynamics in the upstream catchment and to the ability to manage the throughput
of sediment-laden waters. The recent changes in sediment yield were examined using
gauging data from 187 stations of varying sizes from less than 100 km 2 to larger than
1,000,000 km2 in the Upper Yangtze basin between 1956 and 1987.
(Lu, X., & Higgitt. D. (1998). Recent changes of sediment yield in the Upper Yangtze,
China. Environmental Management, 28(5), 697-709.)
b. …many environmental organizations from around the world … assert that this attraction
will create several environmental problems. These organizations have joined forces with
several Chinese environmental groups to stop the dam because of their concern over
possible environmental repercussions. These problems include: pollution, sedimentation
and siltation, erosion, and the risk to wildlife and extinction of species.
(Magagnini, S. (1993). Taming the dragon. The Amicus Journal 15(2), 9-13.
(Huang, K. (1999). The Three Gorges Dam project: A question of sustainable

development? Sociology, December 15.)
c. According to the resettlement plan, all urban relocatees will be settled in new cities and
towns and engage in their original occupations. Some 361 500 rural relocatees live in
1353 villages along the reservoir shores. They will lose their housing and farmland to the
reservoir. One of the greatest difficulties facing them is how to regain replacement land
19
or whether to look for other jobs since there is only a slight possibility of reclaiming
additional land to make up for the loss.
(Heming, L., Waley, P. & Rees, P. (2001). Reservoir resettlement in China: Past
experience and the Three Gorges Dam. The Geographical Journal, 167(3), 195-212.)
d. Despite great strides in their control throughout the People’s Republic of China, Helminth
infections remain an important public health concern. The Institute of Parasitic Diseases
of the Chinese Academy of Preventive Medicine, under the guidance of the Chinese
Ministry of Health, completed a nationwide survey of more than 1 million people that
showed the high prevalence and intensity of intestinal nematode infections; prevalence
can sometimes exceed 50% in the Yangtze River valley provinces… Construction of the
Three Gorges Super Dam on the Yangtze River may promote the emergence and
reemergence of new Helminths and their snail vectors.
(Hotez, P. J., Zheng, F., Long-qi, X., Ming-gang, C., Shu-hua, X., Shu-xian, L., Balir, D.,
McManus, D. P., & Davis, G. M. (1997). Emerging and re-emerging helminthiases and
the public health in China. Perspectives, 3(3), 303-310.)
e. Under present regulations the specific value of peri-urban land is underestimated, neither
cash–in–hand arrangements nor land-for-land swaps are adequate. There are other
problems. The availability of suitable land for resettlement is scarce and rarely of
equivalent quality. The inflexibility of the ‘household responsibility system’ contributes to
the problem. It is suggested that some of those facing displacement should be
encouraged to accept resettlement in places at considerable distance from their current
homes and that a more creative approach should be taken to the issue of compensation
to enable people to develop their trade and business skills.
(Tan, Y., & Wang, Y. Q. (2003). Rural resettlement and land compensation in flooded
areas: The case of the Three Gorges Project, China. Asia Pacific Viewpoint, 44(1), 35-
50.)
Task 4
Having read these pieces of evidence, what is your thesis now? What sub-topics would you
focus on to support your argument/point of view? If you focussed on two sub-topics, what
would they be? Try to identify each category with an abstract term, e.g. gender issues,
power relations, engineering implications, etc. Will you use all sources, or only some?
Statement of your argument, aim or point of view:
Sub-topics:
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Task 5
Now read the next piece of evidence. How will you account for this in your discussion?
In 1931, a flood inundated an area the size of New York state and left 14 million refugees in
its wake. In 1954, floodwaters covered 6.9 million acres and killed 30,000 people. And in the
summer of 1998, flooding triggered by heavy rains has resulted in nearly 14 million displaced
people and a high death toll (Ash, 1998, pp. 78-84). Putting a stop to the flooding and deaths
is extremely important and should be the impetus for building the dam.
Another benefit of building the dam is improved navigation on the river. By raising the water
level, treacherous shoals would be removed. Since the Yangtze carries nearly 80 percent
of China’s riverborne freight, the improved navigation would allow for goods to reach China’s
underdeveloped interior (Ash, 1998, pp. 78-84). Again, this would open up the area and
literally bring in development. It would also improve the valley’s economy which would result
in the improved lives of people.
(Huang, K. (1999). The Three Gorges Dam project: A question of sustainable development?
Sociology, December 15.)
Brackets exercise
Add round brackets (questions 1-5) or square brackets (questions 6-8) to these sentences.
1. Cacao the main ingredient in chocolate grows in tropical places. It’s worth
remembering that, because you can’t grow cacao in Adelaide.
2. According to Boynton 1982, p. 47, “a crucial factor has been overlooked in this
widespread condemnation of chocolate”.
3. Many people have failed to consider a very important point when they say that
chocolate is bad for the health Boynton, 1982, p. 47.
4. Matched text may be properly referenced, or there may still be plagiarised material
from a non-electronic source e.g. a book or journal.
5. Chocolate contains at least 10% chocolate liquor, plus cocoa butter and sugar in
varying amounts, and at least 12% milk milk, cream, milk powder, etc.
6. “Chocolate contains at least 10% chocolate liquor cocoa mass, plus cocoa butter and
sugar in varying amounts.”
7. This was his raison d’être reason for existence.
8. Robert explained to him William that he John would not give the book to him Mike
until he Brad had got it back from them James and Joe.
(sentences 5 and 6 from http://facts-about-chocolate.com/types-of-chocolate/)
21
Note taking
Making notes is an important skill that will enable you to summarise key information and focus your
thoughts from both lectures and your readings. It is more than just writing what has been said or
written. It requires critical thinking and is an interactive activity.
Making notes from lectures

Students sometimes have difficulties when noting from lectures. The lecturer may speak very quickly,
giving lots of new information, while some lecturers have an accent that is difficult to understand.
Others may have a lecturing style that does not seem to follow a logical order, or they may give many
examples for a particular issue, making it hard to get down all of the details. However, there are
many things you can do to help yourself become a more efficient and accurate note maker in
lectures.
Before the lecture

 Many lecturers put outline notes on MyUni prior to the lecture. Make sure you access these
if available, as they can give you an idea of the structure of the lecture and some of the key
ideas.
 Do the set reading before the lecture. Then you will already be familiar with the terms and
concepts being discussed before the lecturer outlines them in the lecture.
During the lecture

 Sit in the lecture theatre where you are best able to hear and see the material.
 Put the date, name of the course and topic at the top of your notes so that they can be easily
stored and retrieved at a future time. Number the pages of your notes.
 Do not try to copy exactly what the lecturer says. You will quickly miss the next few points
while still trying to copy the first statement word for word.
 Not everything the lecturer says will be vital. Try to keep to the main ideas, concepts and
terms. It is not necessary to write down all the examples the lecturer gives to explain an idea.
 Look for cues from the lecturer on what is important to note; the lecturer may write down
something on the board; emphasise a point by raising their voice; or say something like, “This
is important to know for the exam”.
 Develop an abbreviation system that works for you. Use ‘e.g.’ for example; arrows to show
connections between points; and shortened forms of high frequency words. Try to be
consistent, so that you can make sense of your notes at a later date.
 Use quick diagrams or graphs to summarise information where possible.
 Some students decide to tape lectures so that they can listen to them again. You should ask
the permission of the lecturer first. Be aware that this means you will be spending double the
time when you listen to the tape. It is more time efficient to develop solid noting skills.
 Engage critically with the lecture material. Does the material match with your understanding
of the subject? Are there contradictions presented? Are there any unclear aspects? Write
down any questions you have during the lecture. You may be able to ask the lecturer during
the lecture about these, bring them up in a tutorial or follow up in your own reading.
After the lecture

 Review your notes. Make sure you understand them.
 If you are unclear on a point, talk about it with your fellow students, do some reading around
the topic or ask the tutor in your next tutorial.
 Store your notes in a clearly marked folder. This will help with revision for exams or when
you need to locate specific information to do an assignment.
Making notes from your readings
22
There are a number of ways of effectively making notes. Some people make their notes on an A4
page or small index cards. Others prefer to highlight important parts of the text in relevant books or
articles (or photocopies of these). People who are more visual might create a concept map of their
notes, using colour and visual images as well as written words. You need to decide what will work
best for you. Whichever method you use there are some important points to remember:
 Clearly head your notes with the course and topic.
 Ensure you have full bibliographic details (author, date, name of article/book website,
publisher, where published etc) of the reading on your notes as you will need this later when
constructing a reference or bibliography list.
 Try to write a one sentence thesis statement. What is the whole reading/chapter about? This
can often be found in the introduction to the chapter/article and identifying it will focus your
notes.
 Keep your notes to the main point. Do not just copy all of the text in the original.
 Try to write the points in your own words so that you understand the reading. Do not copy
large slabs of the original; rather, paraphrase or summarise the issues.
 Note any page numbers for direct quotes. Keep direct quotes to a minimum and ensure they
are copied exactly. In your writing, quotes are used to support your argument, not to form the
argument itself.
 Leave space for critical comment, e.g. things that are unclear; contradictions; points of
agreement/disagreement with other readings on the same issue; controversial
statements/viewpoints presented; whether you agree with what is being stated.
 Store your notes in an orderly, easily accessible way.
In order to understand the readings in your course it will also be important to make clear, useful
notes. The purpose of your note-making will determine how you approach this task. If you are
required to get an overview of a topic before a lecture (e.g. pre-reading), your noting will not be as
detailed as it will be if you are noting a journal article in order to summarise it for an assessment
task.
You must be selective when making notes from your readings. There is not much point in noting if
your pages of notes are longer than the original text or if you have highlighted whole slabs of reading!
Example of note taking

Below is an excerpt from a book, followed by notes, first in written form and then as a concept map.
Example of original text

Valastro Cotesta, P., Crosling, G. M., & Murphy, H. M. (1998). Writing for accounting students.
Sydney, NSW: Butterworths. p. 86.
Critical thinking underpins your ability to read and write critically, and to produce a critical review.
Critical thinking is based on understanding the nature of academic inquiry, wherein views published
in articles are not absolute. Rather, they are part of the range of views about a topic or issue. Being
able to discuss the strengths and weaknesses of the views put forward in published work is the basis
of critical thinking. Thus, it should be clear that critical reading and writing mean more than just
summarising the view presented in an article. Summarising is based on accepting the given
information and restating it in condensed form, whereas critical writing also involves analysis and
evaluation. These approaches are integrated by the ability to have an overview of the topic as a
whole, as we have explained in Chapter 3 on case studies.
In more detail, analytic thinking means dissecting the information presented in an article or text so
that, for example, unstated assumption and steps which are not logical in the argument and the
reasoning can be identified. It means discerning the issue and the purpose of an article which may
not be explicitly stated. Evaluation is concerned with judging the value of the material for a particular
purpose (Clabaugh et al. 1995: 26). Judgments need to be made on the basis of some criteria. These
can be general in nature, relating to the often unstated values of what is considered quality in the
discipline. The may be related to other criteria, such as the user’s needs, the accounting standards,
23
and the conceptual framework. The evaluation can consider the consistency of the logic in the view
put forward, the validity of the conclusions, and so on.
Example of written notes
Communication course – critical thinking

Thesis statement: Critical thinking requires analysis and evaluation of the material, not just a
condensed version of what has been given.
Critical thinking /reading/writing – strengths & weaknesses of articles – not presenting one absolute
truth
Not just summarising – involves analysis and evaluation too - overview of whole reading
(*read ch 3 as well for more detail)
Analytic thinking – “…dissecting the information presented” (p86) What is the reading actually
saying? What is being assumed?
Evaluation – Evaluating against what? Can be all sorts of criteria depending on what you are judging
against.
(* see Bailey 2001 for better examples)
As seen above, the note maker has started with a thesis statement and has only made notes on the
main points. They have put little comments to themself in brackets to make links to other readings.
They have also asked some questions to prompt further thinking on this topic. The direct quote has
quotation marks around it and a page number.
Example of a concept map
eg:
Assumptions
presented
Examine
content
Purpose?
Analysis
CRITICAL
Condensed THINKING
Purpose?
Summary
Evaluation
Rewrite
Judging Who
judges?
Criteria?
.
Valastro Cotesta, P., Crosling, G. M., & Murphy, H. M. (1998). Writing for accounting students. Sydney, NSW:
Butterworths. p. 86.
Thesis statement:
Critical thinking requires analysis and evaluation of the material; it is not just a condensed
version of what has been given.
Other useful resources

http://www.dlsweb.rmit.edu.au/lsu/content/1_StudySkills/study_pdf/notetaking_reading.pdf
http://www.dlsweb.rmit.edu.au/lsu/content/1_StudySkills/study_pdf/notetaking_lecture.pdf
24
http://www.dlsweb.rmit.edu.au/lsu/content/1_StudySkills/study_pdf/notetaking_class.pdf
Adapted from ALL Learning Guide - Making Notes.

If you require more assistance with making notes please contact the Writing Centre on 8303 5771.
Visit the website for additional resources: www.adelaide.edu.au/writingcentre/
Principal Author: Helene Hipp 2005 Revised: Donna Velliaris 2008
25
As you find information and consult references, write down all the appropriate details needed
to locate that source. It is well worth getting into the habit of noting down these details as
you go, as having to backtrack and check for bibliographic information at the end of your
research is time consuming, especially when deadlines are looming.
You could create a form similar to the table below for recording the necessary details.
Author’s family name and

initials (or name of editor or
institution)
Year of publication
Title
Print or electronic
Edition
Chapter or article title
Volume and number (for

journals)
Publisher
Place of Publication
Page Numbers
Location of item (e.g. uni

library or internet)
Catalogue/call number/online
address
Date viewed online
Key words
Summary of contents
(include page numbers for
specific references)
Your comments and

responses
Adapted from UniSA (2007) Source:

http://www.unisanet.unisa.edu.au/learningconnection/student/learningAdvisors/documents/Documentary%20Note%20System.pdf
26
Essay writing
Essays help you discover more about a topic and write a reasoned analysis of the issues in
question, using a range of external sources to support your position.
An essay is a highly structured piece of writing which follows a typical pattern:
Introduction
Main Body
Conclusion
Writing a good essay can be compared to baking a cake—if you do not mix the right
ingredients in the right quantities or order, and do not follow the required processes, then
the end result will not be what you hoped for!
There is no set model for an essay, but the English for Uni website presents one popular
way to do it. The following example is based around a 1000 word discussion essay.
The parts of an essay
Introduction
Background statement – where you set the context for your essay
Issue(s) – where you outline the specific issues that are
relevant to your essay
Thesis – where you state your position in relation to the issues
Scope – where you outline what exactly is going to be covered in relation to
your argument
Thesis and scope are sometimes combined to form one or more sentences known as
a thesis statement. The thesis statement often comes at the end of the introduction,
although it can be written earlier.
Main Body Each paragraph should focus on one idea only.
The idea can then be developed in a number of ways, such as through

explanation, evaluation, exemplification or incorporation of research data.
Your paragraphs should be balanced – keep to the rule of no less than 3

sentences per paragraph.
Your paragraphs should link together – use connective words, both within
and between paragraphs, to keep a sense of cohesion and linkage.
Conclusion Your conclusion ties your essay together. It should normally:
Begin with a link to the preceding paragraph.

Restate your thesis and summarise your principal points.
End with a broad statement relating to the significance of your argument.
A conclusion is not normally longer than an introduction.
27
Topic/Title
It is important for you to analyse your topic and title very carefully in order to understand the
specific aim of the question. To do this, you need to break down the question. Most essay
questions will contain these three elements:
 Content/Topic words give the subject of the essay

 Limiting/Focus words provide a narrower scope for the essay
 Directive or Instructional words tell you how to approach the essay
Look at these sample essay titles from A) Economics and B) Nutrition:
Directive or Instructional word

Content words
Outline the impacts of states and markets in today’s globalised world economy. A
)
Limiting words
“Chocolate is a healthy food”. Discuss. B

))
Content word Directive or Instructional word
In example B , answering the question fully involves looking closely at the directive word
))
Discuss and analysing its exact meaning:
Present various points and consider the different sides. This is usually longer than an explanation, as you
Discuss
need to present evidence and state which argument is more persuasive.
So, in an essay entitled:
“Chocolate is a healthy food.” Discuss.
you would need to:

 consider a number of points in relation to the title
 balance your points between supporting and opposing positions
 consider which of the positions is the most persuasive and explain why
You also need to consider the length of your essay—in a 2000 word essay you can
cover substantially more points than in a 1000 word one! This example is based on
a 1000 word essay.
28
Essay example 1
Since Spanish explorers brought back chocolate from the new world, chocolate consumption
has become a worldwide phenomenon. At first, chocolate, a derivative of the cacao bean,
was consumed as a drink, only later achieving mass popularity in tablet or bar form.
However, chocolate’s inherent popularity does not equate to it possessing healthy
properties, as suggested by the title. The realities of chocolate are more down to earth; a
number of these realities will be addressed in this essay. Chocolate has chemical properties
that can influence mood and there is possible evidence for some positive impacts of
chocolate on cardiovascular health. Yet, such positive attributes are counterbalanced
somewhat by the argument that, in some instances, chocolate can be viewed as a drug
rather than a food. Moreover, there is the possibility of some correlation between over-
consumption of chocolate and obesity. Thus, it will be argued that despite chocolate’s
positive effect in some cases on mood and the cardiovascular system it has also been linked
to addiction and obesity and is therefore not a healthy food.
Consumption of chocolate is something that many enjoy, and there is evidence (Parker,
Parker, & Brotchie, 2006) that high carbohydrate foods such as chocolate do have a ‘feel
good’ effect. Moreover, Scholey and Owen (2013) in a systematic review of the literature in
the field point to several studies, such as Macht and Dettmer (2006) and Macht & Mueller
(2007) which appear to confirm this effect. Yet, as Parker, Parker and Brotchie (2006) note,
the mood effects of chocolate are not long-lasting. In addition, mood is something that is
difficult to isolate and quantify, and aside from the study by Macht and Dettmer (2006) there
appears to be little research on any longer term mood affecting influences of chocolate.
Another point is raised by Macht and Dettmer (2006), whose study found that positive
responses to chocolate correlated more with anticipation and temporary sensory pleasure,
whereas guilt was also a statistically significant factor for many, for whom the ‘feel-good’
effect would be minimalised. As these authors stress, “temporal tracking of [both] positive
and negative emotions” (p.335) before and after consuming chocolate in future studies
could help in further understanding the ‘feel good’ effect and more negative emotions.
Another possible positive influence of chocolate is upon cardiovascular health. Chocolate,

processed accordingly, can be a provider of significant quantities of heart-friendly flavanols
(Hannum, Schmitz, & Keen, 2002) which help in delaying blood clotting and reducing
inflammation (Schramm et al., 2001). Such attributes of flavanols in chocolate need to be
considered in the context of chocolate’s other components – approximately 30% fat, 61%
carbohydrate, 6% protein and 3% liquid and minerals (Hannum, Schmitz, & Keen, 2002).
The key to maximising the benefits of flavanols in chocolate appears to lie in the level of fats
present. Cocoa, which is simply chocolate minus the fat, is the most obvious candidate for
maximising heart health, but as Hannum, Schmitz and Keen (2002) note, most cocoa
products are made through an alkali process which destroys many flavanols. Optimal
maximisation of the flavanols involves such compounds being present in cocoa and
chocolate products at levels where they are biologically active (Ariefdjohan & Savaiano,
2005).
The biological makeup of chocolate is also relevant in determining whether chocolate is

better viewed as a food or a drug, but the boundaries between indulgence and addictive
behaviour are unclear. Chocolate contains some biologically active elements including
methylxanthines, and cannabinoid-like unsaturated fatty acids (Bruinsma & Taren, 1999)
which could represent a neurochemical dependency potential for chocolate, yet are present
in exceedingly small amounts. Interestingly, and linked to chocolate and mood, a study by
29
Macdiarmid and Hetherington (1995) found that self-determined ‘chocolate addicts’ reported
a negative correlation between chocolate consumption and mood, perhaps indicative of
addictive or compulsive type behaviour. However, as Bruinsma and Taren (1999) note,
eating chocolate can represent a sensory reward based, luxurious indulgence, based
around texture, aroma and flavour anticipation, rather than a neurochemically induced
craving. Yet, it has been argued that chocolate is sometimes used as a form of self-
medication, particularly in relation to magnesium deficiency. A study by Pennington (2000
in Steinberg, Bearden, & Keen 2003) noted that women do not generally meet US guidelines
for trace elements, including magnesium. This correlates with earlier studies by Abraham
and Lubran (1981), who found a high correlation between magnesium deficiency and
nervous tension in women. Thus, tension-related chocolate cravings could be a biological
entity fuelled by magnesium deficiency. Overall, however, it would appear that the proportion
of people using chocolate as a drug rather than a food based sensory indulgence is small,
though further research might prove enlightening.
A final point to consider in relation to chocolate is the perception that chocolate is linked to
obesity. A person is defined as being obese when their Body Mass Index is greater than 30.
The literature on chocolate and obesity has clearly demonstrated that there are no specific
correlations between the two variables (Beckett, 2008; Lambert, 2009). This is typified by
the findings of Mellor (2013), who found that, over a period of eight weeks of eating 45 grams
of chocolate per day, a group of adults demonstrated no significant weight increase. As
Lambert (2009) notes, chocolate consumption alone is not likely to cause obesity, unless
large amounts of other calorie dense foods are consumed and this calorie dense intake is
greater than needed for bodily function, bearing in mind levels of activity. The stereotypical
‘chocoholic’ seems more likely to consume many other sweet foods and be less likely to
take exercise than other people, so chocolate consumption is only one possible variable
when considering the causes of obesity.
Obesity and chocolate consumption seemingly have no proven correlations. Yet, in this
essay, many chocolate focused arguments have been presented, including the transient
effect of chocolate on mood and the fact that it is as likely to create feelings of guilt as of
well-being. Another possible positive dimension to chocolate is a correlation with
cardiovascular health. Yet the potential benefits of flavanols in chocolate are currently offset
by the high fat/carbohydrate content of most forms of chocolate. Whether chocolate is a food
or a drug is also unclear. The literature outlines the chemical properties of chocolate which
could help explain some addictive type behaviour, particularly in regards to nervous tension
in women, but there is also a strong research focus on chocolate as a sensory-based
indulgence. It can therefore be said that chocolate is not a healthy food, but can be enjoyed
as part of a healthy and balanced diet and lifestyle.
(Word count: 1087. This is within 10% of the 1000 word limit, which is usually acceptable.
Check this with your lecturer if you are in any doubt.)
References
Abraham, G. E., & Lubran, M. M. (1981). Serum and red cell magnesium levels in patients
with premenstrual tension. The American Journal of Clinical Nutrition, 34(11), 2364-2366.
Retrieved from http://ajcn.nutrition.org/content/34/11/2364.short
Ariefdjohan, M. W., & Savaiano, D. A. (2005). Chocolate and cardiovascular health: Is it too
good to be true? Nutrition Reviews, 63(12), 427-430. doi: http://dx.doi.org/10.1111/j.1753-
4887.2005.tb00118.x
30
Beckett, S. T. (2000). The science of chocolate. Cambridge, UK: Royal Society of Chemistry.
Bruinsma, K., & Taren, D. L. (1999). Chocolate: Food or drug? Journal of the American
Dietetic Association, 99(10), 1249-12.
doi: http://dx.doi.org/10.1016/S0002-8223(99)00307-7
Hannum, S. M., Schmitz, H. H., & Keen, C. L. (2002). Chocolate: A heart-healthy food?
Show me the science! Nutrition Today, 37(3), 103-109. Retrieved from
http://journals.lww.com/nutritiontodayonline/Abstract/2002/05000/Chocolate__A_Heart_he
althy_Food__Show_Me_the.4.aspx
Lambert, J. P. (2009). Nutrition and health aspects of chocolate. In S. Beckett (Ed.),
Industrial chocolate manufacture and use, (4th ed., pp. 623-635). London: Wiley Blackwell.
Retrieved from http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/9781444301588.ch27/pdf
Macht, M., & Dettmer, D. (2006). Everyday mood and emotions after eating a chocolate bar
or an apple. Appetite, 46(3), 332-336. doi: 10.1016/j.appet.2006.01.014
Macht, M., & Mueller, J. (2007). Immediate effects of chocolate on experimentally induced
mood states. Appetite, 49(3), 667-674. doi:10.1016/j.appet.2007.05.004
Macdiarmid, J. I., & Hetherington, M. M. (1995). Mood modulation by food: An exploration
of affect and cravings in ‘chocolate addicts’. British Journal of Clinical Psychology, 34(1),
129-138. doi: 10.1111/j.2044-8260.1995.tb01445.x
Mellor, D. D. (2013). The effects of polyphenol rich chocolate on cardiovascular risk and
glycaemic control in type 2 diabetes mellitus (Doctoral dissertation, University of Hull, UK).
Retrieved from https://hydra.hull.ac.uk/resources/hull:7109
Parker, G., Parker, I., & Brotchie, H. (2006). Mood state effects of chocolate. Journal of
Affective Disorders, 92(2), 149-159. doi: 10.1016/j.jad.2006.02.007
Scholey, A., & Owen, L. (2013). Effects of chocolate on cognitive function and mood: A
systematic review. Nutrition reviews, 71(10), 665-681. doi:10.1111/nure.12065
Schramm, D. D., Wang, J. F., Holt, R. R., Ensunsa, J. L., Gonsalves, J. L., Lazarus, S. A.,
Schmitz, H. H., German, J. Bruce, & Keen, C. L. (2001). Chocolate procyanidins decrease
the leukotriene-prostacyclin ratio in humans and human aortic endothelial cells. The
American Journal of Clinical Nutrition, 73(1), 36-40. Retrieved from
http://ajcn.nutrition.org/content/73/1/36.full
Steinberg, F. M., Bearden, M. M., & Keen, C. L. (2003). Cocoa and chocolate flavonoids:
Implications for cardiovascular health. Journal of the American Dietetic Association, 103(2),
215-223. doi: 10.1053/jada.2003.50028
31
Essay example 2. A bad example! Can you see any problems here?
The symptom not the problem treating plagiarism within academia
Due to the increased accessibility of information (Combes), this concern is arguably

misplaced, as with the advance of technology also comes with the advance of plagiarism
detection programs such as Turnitin.com (Zwagerman). This concern assumes that people
are presently and historically equally inclined to plagiarise if given the means and resources.
Instead, the issue of plagiarism and its rise should be reconceptualised, rather than being a
central force in undermining academic integrity and academic institutions, plagiarism is
symptomatic of an already compromised culture of academic integrity. Reactive policies
used to punish and deter plagiarism do little to address the issues that underlie plagiarism
as a phenomenon, this compromised culture of academic honesty can be located in shifting
cultural values which commodify knowledge and locate the value in education to grades and
outcomes rather than content.
With the concept of plagiarism formed through a capitalistic lens of property and
ownership (2014), knowledge and ideas within academia take on value based on their
potential profitability. Operating through the same lens of value and profit, there has been a
cultural shift in how education is valued, where more emphasis is put on grades and
outcomes as precursors to success.. One of the reasons behind this shift in values can be
pinpointed in the phenomenon of qualification inflation where requirements for entry-level
jobs have changed to require higher levels of qualifications compared to previous decades.
Where entry—level jobs with middling to upper—level incomes used to only require a high
school diploma, qualifications achieved through a tertiary education have now become the
bare minimum, as a result, career—based success hinges on success within tertiary
education where grades are often only a measurement of the quality of an end product while
not giving any weight to the process of achieving the product such as the case for academic
essays where final drafts are often only considered for grading. Students therefore learn to
value grades over actual learning. A survey of students by Woessner for example, found
that plagiarism has become a reasonable risk in exchange for higher grades and a greater
chance for success and financial gain, this too, is detrimental to teachers in regards to how
their teaching is valued by students and institutions. Where their teaching is also similarly
measured too through the same metric of success, and the institutions that they work for
only place value on their students’ outcomes as a reflection of both the capabilities of the
students and academic staff (Zwagerman, 2008). It is due to how knowledge is valued within
education, where results and grades are prioritised over the content, and learning process,
that academic integrity becomes compromised, and plagiarism becomes a symptom of the
emphasised need for higher grades as a precursor to academic and hence financial and
career success.
Plagiarism is not just a matter of conventional morality, where there is a definable split
between the good ‘honest’ and bad ‘dishonest’ students. In a study of students by Jonsson
& Orlenius 2013 there was almost zero correlation between their acceptance of plagiarism,
and personal conventional moral standards. Reactive policies in regards to dealing with
plagiarism rely on fear-based “catch and punish” systems in order to alleviate the problem
on a surface level (Devlin 2006), but ultimately perpetuate the system that plagiarism is
symptomatic of; rather than truly maintaining a culture of academic integrity. Technologies
such as Turnitin.com for example are primarily used as a deterrent for plagiarism rather than
just apprehending plagiarists (User Guide, 2005), this consequence—based system relies
on fear to enforce academic integrity. This fear-based “catch and punish” system can be
similarly seen in how academic staff implement policies in regards to addressing plagiarism.
Anecdotally, swift and harsh punishments such as expulsion are dealt to plagiarising
32
students out of fear for negative course evaluations from “problem” students if allowed to
stay (Zwagerman 2008). Both instances of this catch and punishment system are clear
examples of how reactive policies used to target plagiarism locate the problem on an
individual level, where academic dishonesty is considered a personal moral or character
failing and where such immoral characters must be caught and punished rather than an
institutional level where plagiarism is a symptom of a shifting culture around academic
dishonesty and integrity. This reflects a system that lacks an understanding of the reasons
behind plagiarism and by extension; a system which poorly addresses plagiarism as a
symptom of a cultural and systemic problem.
Instead, the acceptance of plagiarism was largely dependent on factors such as their
discipline and the norms and ethical value systems of their educational discipline. Therefore
contrary to reactive approaches to plagiarism—which assumes student dishonesty to be the
default and a product of individual failings, plagiarism should be looked at on a systemic
level as a product of the culture around academic integrity within tertiary institutions. As
reactive policies do nothing to address the root causes for plagiarism; which is located within
a morally compromised culture of academic integrity reducing plagiarism through these
methods arguably does not do much to improve the culture of academic integrity, as with
any other social, moral or ethical issue, fear-based punishment systems are wholly
inadequate in dealing with improving the culture of academic integrity, and alleviating
plagiarism as a product of it’s compromised nature.
Proactive approaches rather than reactive are integral in the restructuring of culture
around academic integrity, moving beyond just reducing individual instances of plagiarism
and instead targeting the root of the problem (Combes). Examples of proactive solutions to
address problems such as the overemphasis of outcomes in education would involve
making the process of completing assignments integral to the final grade rather than placing
all the weighted value in the end product this may include essay plans and drafts becoming
marked as summative work (Walker, 1998). Overall, while reactive policies dealing with
plagiarism are somewhat effective in reducing plagiarism on a surface level, these fear-
based punishment systems ultimately prove ineffective in addressing the root problem that
plagiarism is symptomatic of; a compromised culture of academic integrity. Furthermore,
including workshops, on plagiarism, or emphasising the importance, of the citation process
and engagement of content, through tasks, such as annotated bibliographies, would help
educate students, on clear-cut guidelines on how to properly cite within their discipline, and
the purpose and importance, of the citation process in relation to sourcing and tracking ideas
(Combes 2005 Briggs, 2009;). These tasks also prove beneficial to encouraging educators
to be more involved with their students’ process of completing assignments. And be more
readily available to students who require aid (Walker, 1998 Briggs, 2009)
The commodification of knowledge and its lack of cultural value outside of profit through
successful career prospects already devalue ‘academic writing and honesty’. Plagiarism is
therefore symptomatic of a shift in ‘cultural values’ in regards to ‘knowledge’ and its measure
of ‘worth’. Academia needs to move beyond ‘reactive policies’ to reinforce ‘academic
integrity’: and instead take proactive approaches that educate and emphasise the
importance of the content and process of academic writing, this means moving beyond an
individual—level understanding of the issue onto an institutional-level in order to create a
dramatic cultural change within tertiary institutions and academia in regards to academic
integrity. This is a task that will require a collaborative effort from the top down - policies,
administrators, academic staff; and students. Moreover these methods reduce alienation
between students and educators that may cause students to disengage with their course
work and honouring academic honesty codes (2006).
33
REFERENCES
Nicole Auer and Ellen Krupar (2001). Mouse click plagiarism: The role of technology in
plagiarism and the librarian's role in combating it. Library Trends, 49(3), 415.
B. Combes, B. (2005). The copy-and-paste culture of the Net generation: Strategies for
dealing with plagiarism. Access, 19(1), 21-24.
Marcia Delvin (2006). Policy, Preparation, And Prevention: Proactive Minimization Of
Student Plagiarism. Journal of higher education policy and management, 45-58.
Evering, L. and Moorman, G. (2012). Rethinking plagiarism in the digital age. Journal of
Adolescent & Adult Literacy, 56(1), 35-44.
Holtz-Bacha, C. (2008). Professionalization. Encyclopedia of political communicationdoi:
http://dx.doi.org/10.4135/9781412953993.n542
Instructor User Guide. (2005).
Shashikiran (2014). Plagiarism and academic integrity. Journal of Indian Society of
Pedodontics and Preventive Dentistry,
Walker Student Plagiarism In Universities: What Are We Doing About It? Higher Education
Research & Development,
Woessner, M. (2004). Beating the house: How inadequate penalties for cheating make
plagiarism an excellent gamble. Political Science And Politics, volume 37 number
02 pages 313-320. http://dx.doi.org/10.1017/s1049096504004287
The essays on the following pages all gained a High Distinction in

previous Academic English courses. They are student essays, and they
are not perfect, but they are very good examples.
34
Essay example 3
The Role of Punctuation in Academic Writing and Scientific Communications
Within academia, correct punctuation is considered vital to relaying information accurately

and without ambiguity. However, when academics seek to disseminate scientific information
to those outside their discipline, or with a medium other than the formal paper, the role of
punctuation may evolve. Recently, a number of ongoing debates in public and political
forums have concerned issues largely based in scientific knowledge, such as: climate
change, weight management, and vaccinations. Acknowledging the fact that the typical
politician or member of public does not hold formal scientific qualifications, scientific
information must first be translated into layman’s terms prior to distribution; allowing the
audience an opportunity to understand the subject matter. As a direct result of this, science
communication has recently arisen as its own dedicated field. Therefore, whilst academic
writing is commonly described as the formal format of presenting information (for instance a
journal article or essay), the term ‘science communication’ in this essay will refer to an
informal presentation of scientific information to a non-academic community. This essay will
argue that punctuation plays an equally vital role in the field of science communication as it
does in academic writing, and will assess the significance of the purpose, audience, and
disciplinary conventions to each writing style and the differences in punctuation they entail.
It is important to evaluate how the purpose of the writing impacts the use of punctuation
in both academic texts and in science communication. Typically, the primary purpose of
academic writing is to accurately convey a new idea or discuss an argument. The secondary
purpose of academic writing, however, is often to be assessed in some form or another,
whether it be by peers or colleagues, tutors, or publishers. When the author’s purpose
includes seeking approval, the author is also writing to observe the requirements and
standards of the discipline, and these requirements commonly include specific punctuation
and formatting guidelines. For example, the American Psychological Association (2010)
dictates the specific uses of a multitude of punctuation marks, including spaces, commas,
and dashes. These stylistic rules serve to ensure consistent formatting between articles,
and simplify not only the author’s task of choosing the correct punctuation, but provides the
reader with the ability to locate and comprehend information at ease, without the distraction
of punctuation discrepancies or misuse (American Psychological Association, 2010).
With regard to why one might write an academic text, Elliott, Peat, Keena, and Baur
(2013) discuss a number of reasons, including an urge to contribute to the field’s
advancement, or to share findings with others. A significant level of detail is generally
required to discuss an argument or share a discovery, often resulting in a significantly
lengthy text. To combat confusion within the paper, paragraphs, page breaks, and section
breaks are utilised to distinguish between abstracts, introductions, sub-topics, and
conclusions. In contrast, science communication in the form of social media, news articles,
or videos generally require neither the length nor level of detail contained in an academic
work, and thus will generally not be as abundantly punctuated as in formal essay or article-
style formatting.
In contrast to the objective of academic writing, the objectives of science communication
can be rather diverse, and can include: raising public awareness on a particular topic,
educating political parties and decision makers, combatting misinformation, and altering
perceptions with regard to new technologies. Whilst discussing some issues that drive the
proliferation of science communication, Gregory and Miller (2000) suggest that the one thing
that all science communicators agree on is their overall aim: “improving [the] relationships
between science and the public” (preface, p. x). The purpose of the communication is also
35
very strongly influenced by the nature of the intended audience, perhaps more so in science
communication than in academic writing.
The audience of the writing will also have an impact on how the text is punctuated, and
to the extent that punctuation determines the structure, complexity, and length of a text, its
use will be regulated by the scope, literacy, and attention-spans of the audience. One
significant way in which punctuation in academic writing is influenced by the audience is
through the use of formulaic language and sentence structure, particularly in relation to word
collocation and semantic or punctuated prosody (Durrant & Mathews-Aydinli, 2011). Whilst
writers’ adoption of a particular vocabulary and punctuated style obviously relates to the
purpose of their writing and the conventions of their field, it is its function in “mark[ing the]
speaker or writer as an ‘insider’ in a given discourse community” (Durrant & Mathews-
Aydinli, 2011, p. 58) that gives formulaicity its importance. In this way, it is the audience’s
receptivity to idiomatic language and a recognisable structure that mandates its use—a
factor reinforced by the apparent increase in the use of formulaic writing as authors become
more established in their field (Durrant & Mathews-Aydinli, 2011, p. 71). Indeed, this use of
formulaic style and punctuation is directly related to the ongoing and reciprocal nature of
academic dialogue, where a given “text is a link in the chain of texts and … its wording [or
structure] is a result of exposure to previous texts” (Livnat, 2012, p. 49). Accordingly,
effective engagement with the audience is reliant not only on use of the established
“linguistic and textual norms”, but on acknowledgement of the “ideological and
epistemological stances” (Livnat, 2012, p. 50) those norms generally represent.
This suggests a significant difference between academic and science communication,
because the latter is not informed by a system of shared terminological and stylistic forms,
and is perhaps predominately disseminative as opposed to dialogic. Further, the wide
audience of the science communication (the general public) to some extent frees the author
from the necessity of using the “highly specific [language] with little room for alternate
interpretations” characteristic of academic writing (Dubé & Lapane, 2014, p. 578). Indeed,
Dubé and Lapane (2014) (p. 587) advise that science communications should be at an
eighth grade level to effectively convey information to the public, and that short sentences,
simple words, and an active voice are paramount in maintaining the interest and
understanding of the general public. To this extent, the use of more complex academic
punctuation (for example, to define the relational operation of multiple clauses) is often
precluded by the expediency of conveying information to the public more clearly, albeit with
perhaps less technical precision.
However, far from being a mere simplification of its academic counterpart, much popular
science communication has its own nuanced elements which can heavily influence the form,
style, and punctuation of its texts. As Perrault (2009) notes, the use of a narrative with
figurative language, the creation of rapport through first or second-person pronouns, and
the use of inquisitive (as opposed to prescriptive) sentences, helps to engage the audience
by encouraging more active involvement with the issues being discussed. Indeed, in the
same way that shared linguistic norms inform the structure of academic writing, so too can
the science communicator invoke colloquial norms to appeal to shared systems of
understanding with a popular audience. The particular vernacular employed by science
communicators when addressing their audience can also arise as a result of the conventions
of the forum in which they speak.
36
Comparatively, the products of science communication are also at the mercy of the trends
and conventions of the journalistic fields in which they operate, and the particular vernacular
employed by science communicators may arise as a result (Gregory, 2015). For example,
a number of science communicators today utilise the micro-blogging platform Twitter as their
primary public forum, with some individuals—such as Astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson
and Biologist Richard Dawkins—maintaining millions of followers (You, 2014). One of the
most apparent impacts on punctuation resulting from this forum is the 140-character limit
per post, resulting in not only drastically abbreviated words, but also the colloquialisation of
punctuation. Whilst the use of vernacular punctuation by science communicators is still
infrequent (due to the importance of maintaining professionality), instances such as that in
Figure 1—where double asterisk’s have been incorrectly employed to denote emphasis—
are still witnessed.
Figure 1: A Tweet by science communicator Dr Karl Kruszelnicki (DoctorKarl, 2017)

Disciplinary conventions also have an impact on the punctuation within both academic
writing and science communication. With respect to academic works in particular, each field
has its own terminology or jargon that authors are expected to use when communicating
amongst their peers, such that when attempting to communicate ideas to those outside
audience, meaning may be lost through the use of this technical terminology (Sword, 2012).
Academic authors are often required to follow the specific writing guides of their institution
or publication, which often prescribe a particular style of punctuation. Sword (2012) also
discusses the fact that whilst almost every writing guide emphasises the use of a varied
vocabulary, engaging sentence structure, and clear terminology, contradictorily, most
academic fields favour bland vocabulary, rudimentary sentence structure, and discipline-
specific jargon. In essence, if an academic author wishes to publish work in a respected
journal, they are required ensure it is presented in the relevant style and manner (Elliott,
Peat, Keena, & Baur, 2013).
In conclusion, not only do punctuation-specific conventions exist within academic writing,
but so too do they occur within non-academic forums. Furthermore, no one influencing
aspect is independent of the remaining two; each will, in some way, impact and be impacted
by the other two, such as with the effect of the intended audience on the conventions which
develop. This essay has considered the factors that influence the use of punctuation in both
academic writing and in science communications, as well as the importance of that
punctuation to effectively conveying meaning. A number of differences have been discussed
surrounding the effect of the purpose, audience, and of existing conventions on the text or
communication. To the extent that these factors underpin each form of writing, they are the
key determiners as to how punctuation is used. The differences between these three
aspects in the areas of academic writing and science communication affect the style,
substance and structure of the text. And though, as we’ve seen, this occurs in different ways,
the punctuation of the resulting texts is particularly suited to those texts’ purpose and
37
audience. Accordingly, punctuation—in whatever form it takes—holds the same level of
significance for both academic and science communication.
References
American Psychological Association. (2010). Publication Manual of the American
Psychological Association (6 ed.). Washington, The United States of America:
American Psychological Association.
DoctorKarl. (2017, February 09). There are **many** Circadian Biorhythm Clocks in your
body, not just one. [Twitter Post] Retrieved from
https://twitter.com/DoctorKarl/status/829871686207934465
Dubé, C. E., & Lapane, K. L. (2014). Lay Abstracts and Summaries: Writing Advice for
Scientists. Journal of Cancer Education, 29, 577-579. doi:10.1007/s13187-013-0570-1
Durrant, P., & Mathews-Aydinli, J. (2011). A function-first approach to idetifying formulaic
language in academic writing. English for Specific Purposes, 30, 58-72.
doi:10.1016/j.esp.2010.05.002
Elliott, E., Peat, J., Keena, V., & Baur, L. (2013). Scientific Writing. London, England: John
Wiley & Sons, Incorporated.
Gregory, J. (2015). Science Communication A2 - Wright, James D International
Encyclopedia of the Social & Behavioral Sciences (Second Edition) (pp. 219-224).
Oxford, England: Elsevier.
Gregory, J., & Miller, S. (2000). Science In Public: Communication, Culture, And Credibility.
Unknown, USA: Basic Books.
Livnat, Z. (2012). Dialogue, Science and Academic Writing. Amsterdam, Netherlands: John
Benjamins Publishing Co.
Perrault, S. (2009). The Role of Popular Science Writing in Public Engagements with
Science. (Doctor of Philisophy in English Dissertation), University of Nevada,
Michigan, USA. Retrieved from
http://search.proquest.com.proxy.library.adelaide.edu.au/docview/304944529
Sword, H. (2012). Stylish Academic Writing. Cumberland, USA: Harvard University Press.
You, J. (2014, September 17). The top 50 science stars of Twitter. Science. Retrieved from
http://www.sciencemag.org/news/2014/09/top-50-science-stars-twitter
(1941 words including the reference list and title)
38
Essay example 4 (by a previous student who obtained a high distinction)
‘Let’s eat Grandma’, or ‘Let’s eat, Grandma’?

Does punctuation make a difference to good academic writing?
Problems arose in classical texts because there were no spaces between words,
making interpretation difficult for readers. The first punctuation marks were dots separating
words, and the punctuation vernacular grew to the index of dots and dashes we know today.
Punctuation greatly serves academic writing as it crystallises interpretation, establishes
clarity, and guides the reader through text. Even non-verbal languages, such as music, have
their own system of punctuation. What punctuation is to writing, articulation is to music: a
structured system of understanding language. Equivalents exist between both systems in a
gestural and expressive manner. This essay will survey the recent history of both language
and music, to explore how using punctuation well, and also how ignoring it completely,
affects language. Panning from the 18th century to the modern day, two main aspects of
punctuation will be revealed: the total excitement and individual use of punctuation, and the
demand of accessible written grammar guides; and the experimentation in ambiguity, and
then complete revolt to include no punctuation at all. Punctuation functions to enhance
academic writing, as it does to achieve correct interpretation in a musical score. The use or
misuse of punctuation will affect interpretation, and this will be evaluated via inter-
disciplinary relevance.
Punctuation helps to organise ideas. It is important to academic writing because it
assists in expressing sophisticated and carefully phrased thoughts. Such was the purpose
of musical articulation in the 18th century: to organise and separate musical ideas.
Punctuation and articulation ensure clarity and preciseness. Adorno and Nicholsen (1990)
use the metaphor that all punctuation is traffic signals: without them, roads would be chaos.
Written language sounds as natural as possible when we correctly apply punctuation.
Commas signify short breaths, question marks suggest verbal infliction, and dashes interrupt
flowing thoughts with an aside. Along with many scholars, Bruthiaux (1993) upholds that
punctuation indicates the natural pauses of sentences, in much the same way breathing
regulates one’s rhythm of speech. This supports the prosodic role of punctuation as metric
and, in some ways, musical.
Between music and language, their system of punctuation is their strongest
connection. Articulation in music enhances phrasing for the benefit of the musician and
produces clarity in melodies. In Classical music, phrases came in bite-sized ideas, with
staccato (or detached) notes separating one idea from the next. As incorrect use of
punctuation can change the meaning of a sentence, without accurate articulation a row of
dotted-quavers (swung half-notes) can sound like a scale of ordinary quavers – changing
what should be a dance or a march into a row of dragged feet. The purpose 18 th century
music was to please aristocrats, and thus compositions had to be crisp and clean. The
Classical period shared historical placement with the Age of Enlightenment, and both were
heavily influenced by the rise of science and asking questions. A strong emphasis in
Classical music was structure; it valued form over musical content. The sonata form was the
most significant development in the period, as it followed a strict ‘question and answer’
format. This was achieved by the functional role of keys and cadences; here, punctuation
becomes part of the structure, as well as separating single musical sentences. Punctuation
serves language on a functional level, and likewise to Classical music, it adds to the formal
structure. Punctuated and articulated phrases ensures total clarity of interpretation and
intended ideas, and Adorno and Nicholsen (1990) warn that a lack of punctuation in both
language and music will lead to “pure sloppiness” (p.305).
Punctuation arose out of the need for correct interpretation. As printing companies
grew and developed in the 19th century, literature was reaching a further and more culturally
diverse audience. With exciting new technology writing became fashionable: more people
39
were reading and more people were writing, and the need for grammar books became a
cultural aesthetic trend (Watson, 2012). These books instructed pupils on the rules of,
amongst other things, punctuation, so they too could write in a desirable style that readers
could digest – without misinterpretation. Writers of the preceding period punctuated in their
own individualistic way, and so the grammar books organised and formulated rules for the
public. In a similar way, formal rules governed the music of romantic composers in the 19 th
century. The 1800s embraced new romantic ideals and art embodied the idea of the self.
While “competent” musicians in the 18th century knew and understood stylistic requirements
of the period, composers in the 19th century wrote for an individual and “expressive nuance”
(Brown, 1993, p.593). Indeed, more instruction was required, but articulation became about
expression. This called for more precise notation of dynamics because their styles became
diverse and highly specific. Thus, romantic composers were recording articulation in a way
that was totally new.
Authors became interested in the composition of syntax, and, embodying
Romanticism, literature and musical phrases were longer, more colourful and became
synonymous with expression. They embellished sentences, and, as Robinson phrased it,
enjoyed the “pretentiousness” and “imprecise thought” (as cited in Watson, 2012, p.669).
Writing of the 19th century valued the semicolon and saw it as “downright trendy” (Watson,
p.650). This encouraged writers to write long descriptive prose, allowing a single idea to
breathe. Another emotive feature of the semicolon is the ability to suspend and agonise. A
passage written by Martin Luther King uses nine semicolons before he “alights on his final
clause” which follows an em dash for emphasis (Watson, 2012, p.670). Here, the long string
of delay is uncomfortable, but only amplifies the force of King’s description of pain and
sufferance of his race. Music, too, employed longer melodic lines. Contrasting greatly to the
18th century style of short crisp ideas, romantic music embodied legato (smooth) playing.
The song cycle was greatly popular in the 19th century, and music began to imitate a singing
style. Here, romantic composers respond to the Classical period, valuing musical content
over form. There was a universal excitement for punctuation. The clarity and description
seemed boundless, and language found new depths of understanding. Like fashion,
however, punctuation changed with the times. Writers became interested in the outcome if
punctuation was removed from its main function—interpretation.
Impressionist writers and musicians explored the effects of art without decisive
meaning. They revelled in experimentation, and their experiments lead them to omit
punctuation altogether. A key feature of impressionism was to illustrate emotional responses
to surroundings; sensations preceded logic. Vague was in vogue: impressions became a
“commercialised mood” (Adorno & Nicholsen, 1990, p.303), and the mood was intentionally
ambiguous. Adorno and Nicholsen label the ellipsis an effective way of achieving this ‘open-
ended-ness’ and leaving something unspecified. Semantic incompleteness is something
James Joyce achieves in his monumental work Ulysses. Although a modernist novel, Crystal
observes that Joyce understands the “value of nothing” (Crystal, 2015, p.167), and either
swaps or exchanges the use of punctuation marks – or leaves parts of the text intentionally
unpunctuated. For example, Joyce was among other 20th century writers who rejected
quotation marks and found substitutions, such as the dash, to punctuate direct speech
(2015, p.315). Similarly, academic writers may not use quotation marks when quoting at
length, but they will denote a quotation by some other marking, such as indents for longer
quotations, or a colon, as used in parliamentary transcriptions.
Despite Joyce’s search for replacements for punctuation, his sentences continue for
pages: Molly Bloom’s soliloquy extends over forty pages with no punctuation, except for the
occasional paragraph indentation. Ulysses radiates the same free-flow ambiguity that
appears in impressionist music; thus, similarities are drawn between Ulysses and Erik
Satie’s Gnossienne 1. Satie’s work swaps structure and a sense of grounding for no bar
lines, creating a stream-of-consciousness narrative as found in impressionist literature. Time
and space are removed from realism, and form is again replaced by subjective perspective
40
and relatedness. Each stroke from an artist, idea of a character, or note from musical score
must be in relation to something else. The ambiguity is filled with impressions, sensations
and mood of the performer. It supports the notion of individual feeling, and literally ‘stepping
back’ to see the full picture. This places more responsibility on the musician for
interpretation. The lack of punctuation and the stream-of-consciousness narration in Joyce
and Satie exudes the impression of a sensual continuum. While unusual, it still feels natural,
as it emphasises normal thought and memory, and our mind’s rejection of a chronological
timeline.
To contrast the equivocal and indefinite ways of Impressionism, Modernism was a
genre of disruption with sudden and unexpected breaks, capturing the devastation of a world
ruined by two world wars. Public sombreness was imitated in a new distinction that emerged
between ‘high’ and ‘low’ art, and a “progressive degeneration of language” (Adorno &
Nicholsen, 1990, p.302). Modernism marked a strong rejection of tradition. When preceding
periods savoured long descriptive prose, Modernism championed the abstract and formless.
Modernist poetry, from the likes of Sylvia Plath, Ezra Pound, and even war poetry from
Wilfred Owen, all display similar qualities of decadence: disturbed imagery, representing
class fall or the destructive nature of war; caesuras, to punctuate unsettled fragments of
thought; and a theme of obscurity, which is a loud social comment of injustice brought upon
by the wars. The same rejection of tradition manifests in modernist composers. No longer
are long legato lines a feature: pieces became shorter, jagged and without grounding.
‘Grounding’ is identifying a tonal centre of a piece of composition. To break from tradition,
Arnold Schoenberg’s twelve-tone technique caused atonality (no tonal centre). This was
displeasing and unsettling to new audiences with a taste for the pleasure and beauty that
reigned in Romantic and Impressionist periods. ‘Emancipation of dissonance’ disagrees with
the idea that there are ‘dissonant’ tones. Often described as abstract and harsh, it avoids
tension by taking it away, allowing free musical expression and no conventional rules of
harmony (Adorno & Gillespie, 1993). Thus, lack of punctuation is neither good nor bad.
Punctuation will forever adapt to suit the trends of its time, and this seems to be a
popular topic for debate. Some scholars argue that, with what seems to be so many rules,
punctuation is losing its place in writing, and features that were once modern now cause its
expiration (Adorno & Nicholsen, 1990). The semicolon in particular is “dying out” because
“no one can write a [balanced clause] anymore” (1990, p.303). Adorno and Nicholsen are
not shy to blame the marketplace (the editors) for haunting consumers with page-long
paragraphs, which will ultimately result in their surrendering of all intellectual pursuits
(p.304). Bruthiaux (1993) suggests the fault is with the grammar books for an abundance
of rules which few understand. Watson (2012) adds to the discussion that too many rules
become unhelpful, and now results in people punctuating “willy-nilly” (p.660). She notes the
collective anxiety among academics and students that they will use punctuation, particularly
semicolons, incorrectly (p.671).
Punctuation is artistically universal, and through musical analogies, this essay
highlights that punctuation encourages clear academic writing. Punctuation has allowed
writers to make their meaning unambiguous. The use of less, however, is sometimes more.
Through the ages, writers have moved from heavily punctuated styles towards styles with
minimum punctuation. This reduced volume of punctuation seems more desirable to the
modern reader. Within only a few centuries, punctuation has undergone a metamorphosis.
While once established for accurate interpretation, the role of interpreter has now shifted to
the consumer. As a result, the reader or listener has an integral role in the reception of art
or language. Punctuation and articulation shed light on academic writing by demonstrating
that it is forever a product of its time. A number of factors contribute to academic writing of
today favouring short and succinct sentences. Perhaps then punctuation should be treated
as a framework, now that short and succinct sentences are in vogue.
41
References
Adorno. T. W. & Gillespie, S. (1993). Music, language, and composition. The Music
Quarterly, 77(3), 401-414.
Adorno, T. W., & Nicholsen, S. W. (1990). Punctuation marks. The Antioch Review, 48(3),
300-305.
Brown, C. (1993). Dots and strokes in late 18th- and 19th-century music. Early Music, 21(4),
593-597+599-610.
Bruthiaux, P. (1993). Knowing when to stop: investigating the nature of punctuation.
Language and Communication, 13(1), 27-43.
Crystal, D. (2015). Making a Point: the pernickety story of English punctuation. London,
Great Britain: Profile Books LTD.
Watson, C. (2012.) Points of contention: rethinking the past, present, and future of
punctuation. Critical Inquiry, 38(3), 649-672.
Vial, S. D. (2000). Take pause: musical punctuation in the eighteenth century (Doctoral
thesis, Cornell University, United States of America). Retrieved from
http://search.proquest.com.proxy.library.adelaide.edu.au/docview/304595295/
42
Essay example 5 (by a previous student who obtained a high distinction; the
original version on which essay example 2 was based)
The symptom, not the problem: treating plagiarism within academia
With the rise of technology and “mouse-click plagiarism” (Auer & Krupar, 2011), a
plagiarism crisis has been declared amongst academics within the past few decades (Aeur
& Krupar, 2011; Combes, 2005; Evering & Moorman, 2012), inciting fear within the academic
community over the possible undermining of academic integrity and institutions. Contrary to
the moral concern of the impact that technology has on the rise of plagiarism, due to the
increased accessibility of information (Combes, 2005), this concern is arguably misplaced,
as with the advance of technology also comes the advance of plagiarism detection programs
such as Turnitin.com (Zwagerman, 2008). This concern assumes that people are presently
and historically equally inclined to plagiarise if given the means and resources. Instead, the
issue of plagiarism and its rise should be reconceptualised; rather than being a central force
in undermining academic integrity and academic institutions, plagiarism is symptomatic of
an already compromised culture of academic integrity. Reactive policies used to punish and
deter plagiarism do little to address the issues that underlie plagiarism as a phenomenon.
This compromised culture of academic honesty can be located in shifting cultural values,
which commodify knowledge, and locate the value in education to grades and outcomes,
rather than content. Proactive strategies are integral in promoting a cultural shift that would
reduce plagiarism, and the systemic structures that promote it.
With the concept of plagiarism formed through a capitalistic lens of property and
ownership (Shashikiran, 2014), knowledge and ideas within academia take on value based
on their potential profitability. Operating through the same lens of value and profit, there has
been a cultural shift in how education is valued, where more emphasis is put on grades and
outcomes as precursors to success, rather than the content of what is learnt (Briggs, 2009).
One of the reasons behind this shift in values can be pinpointed in the phenomenon of
qualification inflation, where requirements for entry-level jobs have changed to require
higher levels of qualifications compared to previous decades. Where entry-level jobs with
middling to upper-level incomes used to only require a high school diploma, qualifications
achieved through a tertiary education have now become the bare minimum (Holtz-Bacha,
2008). As a result, career-based success hinges on success within tertiary education, where
grades are often only a measurement of the quality of an end product, while not giving any
weight to the process of achieving the product, such as the case of academic essays where
final drafts are often only considered for grading. Students therefore learn to value grades
over actual learning. A survey of students by Woessner (2004) for example, found that
plagiarism has become a reasonable risk in exchange for higher grades, and a greater
chance for success and financial gain. This too, is detrimental to teachers in regards to how
their teaching is valued by students and institutions, where their teaching is also similarly
measured through the same metric of success, and the institutions that they work for only
place value on their students’ outcomes as a reflection of both the capabilities of the students
and academic staff (Zwagerman, 2008). It is due to how knowledge is valued within
education, where results and grades are prioritised over the content and learning process,
that academic integrity becomes compromised, and plagiarism becomes a symptom of the
emphasised need for higher grades as a precursor to academic, and hence financial and
career, success.
Reactive policies in regards to dealing with plagiarism rely on fear-based “catch and
punish” systems in order to alleviate the problem on a surface level (Devlin, 2006), but
ultimately perpetuate the system that plagiarism is symptomatic of, rather than truly
maintaining, a culture of academic integrity. Technologies such as Turnitin.com for example
43
are primarily used as a deterrent for plagiarism, rather than just apprehending plagiarists
(Instructor User Guide", 2005); this consequence-based system relies on fear to enforce
academic integrity. This fear-based “catch and punish” system can be similarly seen in how
academic staff implement policies in regards to addressing plagiarism. Anecdotally, swift
and harsh punishments such as expulsion are dealt to plagiarising students out of fear for
negative course evaluations from “problem” students if allowed to stay (Zwagerman, 2008).
Both instances of this “catch and punishment” system are clear examples of how reactive
policies used to target plagiarism locate the problem on an individual level, where academic
dishonesty is considered a personal moral or character failing and where such immoral
characters must be caught and punished, rather than an institutional level, where plagiarism
is a symptom of a shifting culture around academic dishonesty and integrity. This reflects a
system that lacks an understanding of the reasons behind plagiarism, and by extension, a
system which poorly addresses plagiarism as a symptom of a cultural and systemic problem.
As reactive policies do nothing to address the root causes for plagiarism, which is located
within a morally compromised culture of academic integrity, reducing plagiarism through
these methods arguably does not do much to improve the culture of academic integrity, as
with any other social, moral or ethical issue, fear-based punishment systems are wholly
inadequate in dealing with improving the culture of academic integrity, and alleviating
plagiarism as a product of its compromised nature.
Plagiarism is not just a matter of conventional morality, where there is a definable split
between the good ‘honest’ and bad ‘dishonest’ students. In a study of 357 university
students by Jonsson and Orlenius (2013), there was almost zero correlation between their
acceptance of plagiarism, and personal, conventional moral standards. Instead, the
acceptance of plagiarism was largely dependent on factors such as their discipline and the
norms and ethical value systems of their educational discipline. Therefore contrary to
reactive approaches to plagiarism, which assumes student dishonesty to be the default and
a product of individual failings, plagiarism should be looked at on a systemic level as a
product of the culture around academic integrity within tertiary institutions.
Proactive approaches, rather than reactive, are integral in the restructuring of culture
around academic integrity, moving beyond just reducing individual instances of plagiarism
and instead targeting the root of the problem (Combes, 2005). Examples of proactive
solutions to address problems such as the overemphasis of outcomes in education would
involve making the process of completing assignments integral to the final grade rather than
placing all the weighted value in the end product; this may include essay plans and drafts
becoming marked as summative work (Walker, 1998). Furthermore, including workshops on
plagiarism, or emphasising the importance of the citation process and engagement of
content through tasks such as annotated bibliographies, would help educate students on
clear-cut guidelines on how to properly cite within their discipline, and the purpose and
importance of the citation process in relation to sourcing and tracking ideas (Briggs, 2009;
Combes, 2005). These tasks also prove beneficial to encouraging educators to be more
involved with their students’ process of completing assignments and be more readily
available to students who require aid (Briggs, 2009; Walker, 1998). Moreover, these
methods reduce alienation between students and educators that may cause students to
disengage with their course work and honouring academic honesty codes (Devlin, 2006). It
is only through the implementation of proactive methods and policies that a culture of
academic integrity can be maintained.
Overall, while reactive policies dealing with plagiarism are somewhat effective in
reducing plagiarism on a surface level, these fear-based punishment systems ultimately
prove ineffective in addressing the root problem that plagiarism is symptomatic of—a
compromised culture of academic integrity. The commodification of knowledge, and its lack
44
of cultural value outside of profit through successful career prospects, already devalue
academic writing and honesty. Plagiarism is therefore symptomatic of a shift in cultural
values in regards to knowledge and its measure of worth. Academia needs to move beyond
reactive policies to reinforce academic integrity, and instead take proactive approaches that
educate and emphasise the importance of the content and process of academic writing. This
means moving beyond an individual-level understanding of the issue onto an institutional-
level in order to create a dramatic cultural change within tertiary institutions and academia
in regards to academic integrity. This is a task that will require a collaborative effort from
the top down—policies, administrators, academic staff, and students.
REFERENCES
Auer, N. J., & Krupar, E. M. (2001). Mouse click plagiarism: The role of technology in
plagiarism and the librarian's role in combating it. Library Trends, 49(3), 415.
Briggs, R. (2009). Shameless! Reconceiving the problem of plagiarism. Angelaki, 14(1), 65-
75. http://dx.doi.org/10.1080/09697250903006476
Combes, B. (2005). The copy-and-paste culture of the Net generation: Strategies for dealing
with plagiarism. Access, 19(1), 21-24.
Devlin, M. (2006). Policy, preparation, and prevention: Proactive minimization of student
plagiarism. Journal Of Higher Education Policy and Management, 28(1), 45-58.
http://dx.doi.org/10.1080/13600800500283791
Evering, L., & Moorman, G. (2012). Rethinking plagiarism in the digital age. Journal of
Adolescent & Adult Literacy, 56(1), 35-44.
Holtz-Bacha, C. (2008). Professionalization. In L. L. Kaid & C. Holtz-Bacha (Eds.),
Encyclopedia of political communication (pp. 656-658.). doi:
http://dx.doi.org/10.4135/9781412953993.n542
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http://ist.njit.edu/sites/ist.njit.edu/files/lcms/teaching/turnitin/tii_instructor_guide.pdf
Jonsson, A., & Orlenius, O. (2013), "Plagiarism in Higher Education: A Question of Moral
Development or Sociocultural Influence of Discipline", in , Open Journal of
Education, vol. 1, no. 8, p. 194.
Shashikiran, N. (2014). Plagiarism and academic integrity. Journal of Indian Society of
Pedodontics and Preventive Dentistry, 32(1), 1-2.
Walker, J. (1998). Student plagiarism in universities: What are we doing about it? Higher
Education Research & Development, 17(1), 89-106.
http://dx.doi.org/10.1080/0729436980170105
Woessner, M. (2004). Beating the house: How inadequate penalties for cheating make
plagiarism an excellent gamble. Political Science And Politics, 37(02), 313-320.
http://dx.doi.org/10.1017/s1049096504004287
Zwagerman, S. (2008). The Scarlet P: Plagiarism, panopticism, and the rhetoric of academic
integrity. College Composition and Communication, 59(4), 676-710. Retrieved from
http://www.jstor.org/stable/20457030
45
Essay example 6 (by a previous student who obtained a high distinction)
What Is Critical Thinking and How Important Is It for University Study?
Critical thinking skills can support activities in many situations. A critical thinker possesses
quick responses and multiple points of view that can be used to take the best possible
decisions in dealing with problems. A critical thinker also knows how to evaluate
information and assess suggestions. Many definitions of critical thinking are given by
experts in their own fields, but Angelo (1995, p.6) indicates that critical thinking skills are
the purposeful use of discerning, higher request thinking abilities, such as examination,
analysis, issue acknowledgment, deduction, and assessment.
In terms of its importance, critical thinking skills can be used in either the workplace or
academic life. It has been argued (Cobanoglu, Dede, & Poorani, 2006, p.32) that critical
thinking skills are necessary to create a thriving career and to develop competent
employees. In academic contexts, skills of critical thinking are also considered vital,
especially in western universities (Davies & Barnett, 2015, p. 28). University students will
be involved in various academic tasks that require them to analyse and evaluate their
academic works. Having these fundamental skills in higher education will enable university
students to explore and search digital information effectively and to acquire
comprehensive understandings of scholarly materials. Furthermore, developing quality
essays and conducting research require students to possess these skills so that they can
fulfil university academic standards. Thus, it is clear that critical thinking has a positive
impact on university students for exploring digital information, understanding academic
texts, writing assignments and conducting research.
Critical thinking contributes significantly in the academic context in the era of technology
(Oliver & Utermohlen, 1995, p.2). In a rapidly evolving technological era, students have
much information from many resources that can be used as primary sources of
knowledge. However, students need to use their critical thinking skills to evaluate whether
the information given is reliable or not. The large amount of available information also
forces students to analyse the quality of the sources to make effective decisions on which
resources will be most useful to them. Moreover, since students are shifting into an era of
information explosion, they might have more complex issues to deal with, increasing
demands on students’ thinking skills. Obtaining these skills will help students to make wise
judgements on sorting information (Elder & Paul, 2008, p.388). Yet, as Eshet and Amichai
(2004, p.421) note, finding reliable information requires more than just having critical
thinking skills in order to use digital information effectively. In contrast to Eshet and
Amichai, another point proposed by Gilster (1997, p.6) is that critical thinking is the most
important skill when searching for information on the Internet, since the Internet is filled
with obscure, false and incomplete explanation. University students should use their
critical thinking in filtering information and become active learners rather than passive
users.
Another possible benefit of critical thinking skills is that it will help students to enhance
their reading comprehension to a higher level. Reading is an inevitable part of students’
lives that will be continued even after finishing studies. Chamot (2004, p.16) argues that
reading is a process involving language and knowledge to send information from sender to
recipient. There is evidence that critical thinking has a significant effect on understanding
reading books (Yousefi & Mohammadi, 2016, p.802). Furthermore, Eftekhary and Kalayeh
(2014, p.623) state that critical thinking skills enable students to evaluate and analyse
academic texts and locate problematic aspects. When reading, students see the text as a
product of the author’s thinking. They dig in to understand the author’s point of view and
46
re-assemble it in their own minds. Proficient readers always have a better understanding
of readings than novice readers (Paris & Jacobs, 1984, p.2083). They will find it easy to
identify the evidence that a writer needs to justify his or her claims. For university students,
critical thinking skills are not just finding the authors’ thought flow. Instead, they should
develop a map of ideas. After gaining the understanding of author’s ideas, students can
then identify and evaluate the goal of the academic text.
Essays are well-grounded with critical thinking (Vyncke, 2015, p.6). Critical thinking skills
make students dig deep to come to a point of view that can be argued in their writing. An
essay written with critical thinking will impress others since it grasps the issues in a more
developed manner. All elements of these skills—decision making, critical analysis,
evaluating, and problem-solving—will make a great essay. As the starting point in
constructing essays, students should decide what issues they will take and how to
organize an essay and do research around these issues. Critical analysis, as a second
step of the writing process, determines underlying judgments or opinions for an essay. Any
time students need to expand ideas, they might use this skill. The next step students
should take is evaluation. Evaluation is an absolutely urgent skill in writing. Students have
to back up their opinions with authentic examples and facts. This can be concluded that
students need to evaluate whether the facts and arguments they use are logical and valid.
Problem-solving can be seen as the most essential of all because all students will face
problems in completing writing tasks. Students with problem-solving skills can break a
problem into parts and figure out which aspect is not working. However, Mcpeck (1981,
cited in Moore, 2004, p. 13) asserts that critical thinking is only about acquiring language
and is not related to any skills in developing arguments. Conversely, a more current study
by Davies (2008, p.327) found that critical thinking skills make students independent
thinkers, enabling them to meet academic standards such as avoiding plagiarism, correctly
paraphrasing and choosing reliable academic materials. This writer also warns that critical
thinking is the most challenging to demonstrate, but acquiring this skill will significantly
support students in their academic writing essays.
A final point to consider in relation to critical thinking for university students is its facilitative
effects on conducting research. Students should have a strong curiosity about what is
being studied and always be thirsty for new knowledge. Having these skills allow them to
obtain effective judgements as the basis of their research. In other words, students who
have these skills have full confidence to defend their assumptions. As Wallmann and
Hoover (2012, p.93) note, a high level of critical thinking is essential for a university
student to conduct research. These skills are able to support them in evaluating and
synthesizing information. Interestingly, linked to critical skills and research for medical
students, a study by The Royal Australian College (2011, p.411) revealed that the medical
students used critical thinking skills for evaluating and understanding research
implications. This study concluded that incorporation of critical skills into conducting
research improved students’ quality of research since the students had capability of:
identifying clinical questions occurring in their everyday academic lives, accurately and
confidently appraising research, and applying their research to patients.
Previous studies have confirmed a positive correlation between critical thinking skills and
technological literacies proven by improving capability of university students in sorting
useful information. Another positive effect of critical thinking skills is deep understanding
on academic materials, particularly in regard to help university students in analysing
problems. Creating outstanding essays need critical thinking skills that can be used to
arrange ideas effectively while these skills also enable students to find reliable judgments
as research’s basis. It can, therefore, be said that mastering critical thinking can fully
47
support the learning process of university students regardless of their educational
backgrounds.
References
Angelo, T. A. (1995). Beginning the dialogue: Thoughts on promoting critical thinking:

Classroom assessment for critical thinking. Teaching of Psychology, 22(1), 6-7.
Chamot, A. (2004). Issues in language learning strategy research and teaching. Electronic
Journal of Foreign Language Teaching, 1(2), 14-26.
Cobanoglu, C., Dede, P., & Poorani, A. (2006). An analysis of skills and competencies of
full service hotel technology managers. Journal of Teaching in Travel & Tourism, 6(4), 19-
35.
Davies, W.M. (2008). Not quite right: Helping students to make better arguments. Teaching
in Higher Education, 13(1), 327-340. doi: 10.1080/13562510802045352
Davies, M., & Barnett, R. (2015). The palgrave handbook of critical thinking in higher
education. New York: Palgrave Macmillan.
Eftekhary, A.A., & Kalayeh, K.B. (2014). The relationship critical thinking and extensive
reading. Journal of Novel Applied Sciences, 3(6), 623-628.
Elder,L., & Paul, R. (2008). Critical thinking in a world of accelerating change and
complexity. Social Education, 72(7). 388-391.
Eshet, Y., & Amichai, Y. (2004). Experiment in digital literacy. Cyber Psychology and
Behaviour. 7(4), 421-429.
Gilster, P. (1997). Digital literacy. New York: Wiley Computer Publishing.
Moore, T. (2004). The critical thinking debate: How general are general thinking skills.
Higher Education Research and Development, 23(1), 3-18.
Oliver, H., & Utermohlen, R. (1995). An innovative teaching strategy: Using critical thinking
to give students a guide to the future. Mississippi, USA: Rust College MS.
Paris, S., & Jacobs, J. (1984). The benefits of informed instruction for children’s reading
awareness and comprehension skills. Child Development, 55. 2083 – 2093.
The Royal Australian College. (2011). The RACGP curriculum for Australian general
practice 2011. Retrieved from
http://curriculum.racgp.org.au/media/12350/criticalthinking.pdf
Vyncke, M. (2012). The concept and practice of critical thinking in academic writing: An
investigation of international students’ perceptions and writing experiences. London, UK:
King’s College.
Wallmann, H., & Hoover, D. (2012). Research and critical thinking: An important link for
exercise science students transitioning to physical therapy. International Journal of Exercise
Science, 5(2). 93-96.
48
Yousefi ,S., & Mohammadi, M. (2016). Critical thinking and reading comprehension among
postgraduate students: The case of gender and language proficiency level. Language
Teaching and Research, 7(4). 802-807.
49
Commas separate the parts of a sentence:
 in lists
 when adding information
 to clarify
Full stops mark the end of a sentence.
Comma exercise
Where would you put commas in the following sentences? N.B. They may not all need
commas. Can you explain the meaning if you don’t add a comma, and what difference a
comma would make?
1. He was not run over mercifully.
2. The details required are name date of birth address and telephone number.
3. Australia has one of the world’s safest food-supply systems yet the reported
incidence of food-borne illness in this country has increased in recent years.
4. Truck drivers who fail to give signals are likely to cause accidents.
5. This session will cover essay questions and annotated bibliographies and essay
plans will be covered next week.
(Examples 1-4 are taken from the Style Manual.)
Be careful not to use a comma instead of a full stop. When you use a comma in this way it
is called a comma splice.
For example:
There is also a problem when teaching two different curriculums if one is heavily skills
based and the other is inquiry based, while this is easy to plan for it can be difficult to
implement as the time and duration of the lesson can become a problem. (source:
adapted from student work)
This should be:

There is also a problem when teaching two different curriculums if one is heavily skills
based and the other is inquiry based. While this is easy to plan for, it can be difficult
to implement, as the time and duration of the lesson can become a problem. (source:
adapted from student work)
For more information on punctuation, please see: https://www.thepunctuationguide.com/
50
Make sure you use the online lecture materials ‘Building a sentence’ before you do this
section.
All sentences in English need a subject and a finite verb. The part of a sentence which
contains a subject and a verb is called a clause. Sometimes a sentence only has one clause:
subject verb
Nigella cooked.
Jamie cleaned.
You can join two clauses together to make a longer sentence:
Nigella cooked and Jamie cleaned.
Sentences may also have a complement, which adds information to the subject and verb:
subject verb complement
Nigella made a pizza.
Jamie and Nigella made two pizzas quickly.
They liked pizzas.
If you add extra information, you must still include a subject and a verb:
subject verb
Nigella, who liked cooking, made a pizza.
Imperatives based on verbs are also considered to be complete sentences.
For example:
Cook! Don’t take too long!
Words like although, and and because are conjunctions. They are used to join two clauses
together. That means that if you use a conjunction, you must have two clauses to make a
complete sentence:
subject verb subject verb
Nigella cooked and Jamie cleaned.
Because Jamie liked cooking, he made a pizza.
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Although Nigella and Jamie were busy, they made several pizzas.
Sentences that do not have a subject and a verb are called sentence fragments.
For example:
Because Jamie liked cooking. X
Although Nigella and Jamie were busy. X
You should avoid sentence fragments in academic writing.
Sentence fragment and comma splice exercise
Which of the following are sentence fragments and which are complete sentences? Can you
correct the fragments and comma splices? (You can add words if necessary.)
1. Teamwork means soliciting and utilizing the skills, ideas and opinions of team
members.
2. Preferring to be left alone to get on with your own work.
3. Keeping others informed about any relevant or useful information.
4. Attending team meetings without contributing.
5. When taking action, keep in mind the concerns of other members as well as your own
concerns.
6. Each day provides new challenges for you and your teammates as you work together
to solve problems, your efforts will be more successful if you concentrate on
increasing cooperation with your immediate co-students and with other students as
well.
7. Supporting and encouraging team members.
8. The arena in which many elements of team interaction are worked out is in the
dreaded team meeting, in order for a group in a meeting to achieve anything, the
team needs a certain amount of structure to guide the goals.
9. Laying blame or making judgments about other team members.
10. They ignored critical comments about their team members.
(Source: http://eceserv0.ece.wisc.edu/~morrow/ECE353/teamwork_handout.pdf)
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Library research skills
Go to this link: http://libguides.adelaide.edu.au/home and do the Library Quest before
tomorrow’s session.
Before tomorrow, also read the article about teamwork on the next page and answer the
questions that are based on it.
53
Teamwork
What is teamwork? Why does it matter?
The University of Adelaide Graduate Attributes include teamwork and communication skills.
(http://www.adelaide.edu.au/learning/strategy/gradattributes/)
Before class, look at these questions and see if you agree or disagree with the
statements. Then read the following article (Article 1) and circle the answers
according to Article 1. Be ready to discuss the article in class.
Questions based on Article 1

According to Article 1, which statements below are correct?
1. Disagreement
A. Disagreement is an essential part of teamwork.
B. Teams should avoid all disagreement.
C. Teamwork never involves disagreement.
D. Teams should always agree on everything.
E. Disagreement is sometimes acceptable in teamwork.
2. Team problems
A. Teams should always tell other people about any team problems they face.
B. Teams should gossip about each other.
C. Team members should talk to family members about their problems.
D. Teams should maintain confidentiality.
E. Teams should discuss their problems in a MyUni discussion group which all
Academic English students can access.
3. Team members
A. We are all basically the same.
B. Everyone is unique.
C. We are all slightly different.
D. We are all human.
E. No man (or woman) is an island.
4. Team roles
A. There is no need to set separate roles for people.
B. Everyone should work on tasks together.
C. Roles can overlap.
D. People can have many roles.
E. Lack of role clarity hinders teamwork.
5. Meetings
A. Successful meetings occur spontaneously.
B. Successful meetings are rare.
C. Successful meetings take a long time.
D. Successful meetings have an agenda.
E. Successful meetings do not need to be planned.
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6. Decision making
A. Reach decisions quickly in your group.
B. Let all necessary team members be involved in the decision.
C. Don’t waste time on decision making.
D. Let one person make the decisions.
E. Appoint a leader to make all the important decisions.
7. Differences of opinion
A. Ensure peace at all costs.
B. Allow people to express different opinions, but don’t dwell on anger.
C. Everyone should express themselves, and be as angry as they need to be.
D. Don’t allow any disagreements.
E. Appoint a leader to make sure that no one disagrees with decisions.
8. Solving problems
A. Stick to your own ideas.
B. Ignore other ideas.
C. Choose only the right idea.
D. Summarise other people’s perspectives and see if they agree.
E. Summarise other people’s perspectives only to your friends.
9. Handling conflict
A. Ignore conflict.
B. Refuse to accept conflict.
C. Acknowledge conflict.
D. Let the leader deal with conflict.
E. Talk about the conflict on your Facebook page.
10. Participation
A. Some people should participate in each meeting.
B. There is no need for everyone to be involved in meetings.
C. The most dominant person should speak most in meetings.
D. Everyone should participate in meetings.
E. It is ok for quieter people not to say anything in meetings.
Article 1
Helpful Teamwork Tips, courtesy of The Center for PSU Academic Computing (CAC),
and other resources
(Source: http://eceserv0.ece.wisc.edu/~morrow/ECE353/teamwork_handout.pdf)
Teamwork implies the intention to work cooperatively with others, working together as opposed to
working separately or competitively.
This Means... This Doesn’t Mean...
soliciting and utilizing the skills, ideas and preferring to be left alone to get on with your
opinions of team members own work
55
keeping others informed and up-to-date about attending team meetings without contributing
any relevant or useful information
when taking action, keeping in mind the engaging in win-lose competition with other
concerns of other members as well as your own members of the team
concerns
supporting and encouraging team members; laying blame or making judgments about other
defending the team’s reputation when others team members and keeping quiet or
criticize ignoring critical comments about your team
members
Conditions that help develop and maintain effective teamwork
1. Common group objectives and goals that are understood and committed to by all team
members.
2. Efforts to develop and use the unique skills and abilities of each team member in a way that
helps a team meet its objectives.
3. Efforts to develop in team member’s flexibility, creativity and sensitivity to the needs of others.
4. A clear value reinforced by our management team, on trust, openness of communication
among team members and between team members.
5. Efforts to increase each member's sense of belonging to the team.
6. Time and attention devoted to teamwork.
7. Rapid and accurate feedback to team members about the effectiveness of their actions and
decisions.
Conditions that present challenges to effective teamwork
1. Team members are new or change often.

2. Persons on the team are unsure of or not happy with their roles.
3. Time pressures make it difficult to adequately develop project and team.
4. The locations or workload of team members make it difficult for team members to have
regular contact with each other.
5. There is uncertainty about the goals or tasks to be accomplished, or individual team members
are unsure of their task proficiency.
6. Differences in perceptions exist among team members and team roles.
7. Communication breakdown exists. This goes for managers also.
8. There are taboo topics that affect team's performance.
9. Participation is not uniformly spread among team members, OR there is not adequate
punishment for those that do not do their part.
Potential Roles of Team Members
1. Discussion Leader – Keeps group on track, maintains full participation.

2. Recorder - Records data in labs and problem solving activities in class, takes notes at
meetings.
3. Reporter – Writes up final draft of labs/problems.
4. Accuracy Coach – Checks group understanding and findings, find resources.
5. Time Keeper – Sets time limits for agenda items.
6. Gate Keeper – Ensures that everyone in team has chance to speak.
7. Devil’s Advocate – Brings up alternate points of view that have not been discussed.
Challenges consensus so the team doesn’t fall into “group-think” mentality and reach
premature conclusions.
56
Your role as part of a team
Courtesy and Understanding Make a Stronger Team

Each day provides new challenges for you and your teammates as you work together to solve
problems. Your efforts will be more successful if you concentrate on increasing cooperation with your
immediate co-students and with other students as well.
Remember that your relationship with your team affects productivity. How do you get along with your
team mates? Try combining courtesy and understanding to build a unified team, and remember
these tips:
 Maintain confidentiality - Breaching a confidence is not only unprofessional, it will cause you
to lose your team members’ trust.
 Do your part - If a team-member has a heavy assignment, don't hesitate to help. It will be
remembered when your load is piling up!
 Be a friend to your teammates - Work together on your problems and ideas, and you may
devise a whole new approach to problem-solving.
 Gain your teammates’ trust by demonstrating honesty and integrity.
 Look for the best in everyone you meet - If you recognize that each person has unique
qualities, everyone's work will be more gratifying.
Team Meetings
The arena in which many elements of team interaction are worked out is in the dreaded team
meeting. In order for a group in a meeting to achieve anything, the team needs a certain amount of
structure to guide the goals.
A successful meeting starts before the meeting when a project manager or team leader informs
members of
the following:
1. Meeting agenda
2. Purpose of the meeting (information sharing, problem solving, decision making, coordination,
planning, etc.)
3. Whose attendance is required
4. Where to find background or support materials required
5. Schedule information (time, place, duration..)
6. Minutes of the previous meeting and any specific pre-meeting assignments
The meeting agenda is similar to a contract or agreement among team members and all team
members should have input in the agenda. The meeting agenda should include:
1. Date, time and location of meeting
2. List of attendees expected
3. Purpose of the meeting
4. Order of business to be conducted at the meeting
5. Ending time
Since a team should be empowered to govern its own affairs, all members should be open to the
fact that a team may modify an agenda. Teams often develop ground rules that extend to how they
want a meeting conducted.
Some possible team ground rules
1. Be prepared for the meeting

2. Come to the meeting on time
3. Start and end meeting on time
4. Value the diversity of team members
5. Support the team concept and process
6. Maintain POSITIVE group dynamics
57
7. Make decisions by consensus of all necessary team members
8. Participate in the meeting. Don't be a lurker
9. Keep records of your own work and the team's compiled work
10. Listen and have an open mind
Evaluate the meetings with the intent of improving future meeting
1. Was the purpose of the meeting clear?

2. Did the ergonomics of the room help or hinder the meeting process?
3. Was jumping to conclusions allowed? Did the group help to suspend judgment and explore
alternatives?
4. Did the group use conflict in a positive way to differentiate ideas?
5. Did the group work toward consensus?
6. Did the team leader document the interaction when the process seemed ineffective?
7. Did the group insist on action commitments (what is to be done, by when and who)?
8. Did the group identify follow-up processes?
Avoid destructive messages such as
 Communication Shut-down - a statement or action that cuts off discussion with no plan to
continue.
 You Should - statements like "You should do this..." which sound parental and insinuate that
"I know better than you".
 Discounting - minimizing another person’s comments by inappropriate reassuring, distracting
or humoring.
 Threatening - expressing an intention to do harm.
 Communicating Through Someone Else - a statement that expresses dissatisfaction
indirectly to the person but through someone else.
 Mind Reading - assuming that your perception of a confusing message is right without
clarifying or assuming the other person can read your mind.
 Silent Treatment - feeling resentment or anger toward another, but not addressing it directly
with that person.
 Double Bind - sending a message where the words say one thing but the body language or
attitude convey a different meaning.
 Judging/Blaming - placing blame or making judgments about another person; often involves
finger pointing.
 Premature Advice - offering immediate advice to someone without showing concern for their
feelings, listening, or helping them problem-solve.
Managing Team Conflict
Identifying Types of Team Conflict:
 Internal conflict - An individual or team member is experiencing a personal conflict that may
or may not be related to the team. The conflict is interfering with the person's ability to
perform.
 Individual conflict with one other team member - One team member is in conflict with
another.
 Individual conflict with the entire team - One team member is experiencing conflict with
the entire team.
 Conflict between several team members - The entire team is experiencing conflict with
several other team members.
 Conflict between teams - The entire team is in conflict with another team.
 Team conflict with one person outside of the team.
58
Most members of a team have to learn at least two fundamentals
1. Disagreement is an essential part of teamwork.

2. Team members have strong feelings and emotions. We cannot expect a team to be authentic
if all that is allowed is logic or information.
For leaders / moderators Help the team's behavior by asking:
1. What are we doing that is blocking the resolution of this problem?

2. How can we express differences without blaming others?
and
3. Help the individuals take ownership of their unproductive behavior.
4. Don't make an excuse when one of your subordinates behaves badly.
Define the team's problem as a shared need. As a group:
1. Identify the causes.

2. Determine the criteria for a solution.
3. Generate options.
4. Determine possible solutions.
5. Develop implementation plans.
6. Review results on a regular basis.
During the problem solving focus on issues, not personalities.
 When the team is determining criteria for a solution, encourage each side to objectively
explain its bottom line requirements.
 Keep reminding the team of ground rules while generating options such as: no criticising
statements by other people until all ideas are posted.
 Encourage everyone to listen to other points of view.
 During the process keep encouraging points of agreement.
 Don't stifle new anger, but also don't dwell on it.
Another set of steps to consider as a team:
1. Acknowledge that the conflict exists.

2. Gain common ground.
3. Seek to understand all angles.
4. Attack the issue not each other.
5. Develop an action plan.
A structured way to handle conflicts:
1. Let each person state their view briefly.

2. Avoid quick consensus.
3. Have neutral team members reflect on areas of agreement or disagreement or get a
mediator.
4. Explore areas of disagreement for specific issues.
5. Play Devil’s Advocate – switch sides to understand other points of view.
6. Summarise your “opponent’s” perspective to his/her satisfaction, have him/her summarize
yours.
7. Have opponents suggest modifications to their own points of view as well as others.
8. If blocked, ask opponents if they can accept the team's decision.
59
Questions to help teams through conflict:
1. What are we supposed to accomplish as a team?

2. What are each of our roles and responsibilities in accomplishing that goal?
3. Who and when do each of us need to get information from?
4. If we get into trouble, whom can we ask without feeling inadequate or helpless?
5. How will we arrive at decisions?
6. What strengths do each of us bring in accomplishing our goals?
7. How are we going to make ourselves more accessible to one another?
Now go back and answer the questions about teamwork on pp. 54-55 using
information from the article to help you.
60
Your attitude to teamwork
One of the keys to successful teamwork is to know yourself. Try these simple statements,
based on Hofstede’s cultural dimensions (Hofstede, G. (1967-2009). Geert Hofstede cultural
dimensions. Retrieved from: http://www.geert-hofstede.com/).
There are no right or wrong answers. For each answer, mark where you are on the scale.
Work preferences
1. I prefer to work with other people to reach a solution.
Strongly disagree Strongly agree

1 2 3 4 5
2. I prefer to work by myself to reach a solution.

1 2 3 4 5
3. I prefer to establish clear guidelines when I’m working.

1 2 3 4 5
4. I prefer to work flexibly and let ideas just come to me.

1 2 3 4 5
5. I’m very practical.

1 2 3 4 5
6. I prefer someone else to make the practical decisions.

1 2 3 4 5
7. I am assertive.

1 2 3 4 5
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8. I am unassertive.

1 2 3 4 5
9. I show my feelings easily.

1 2 3 4 5
10. I prefer to hide my feelings.

1 2 3 4 5
11. I prefer to work at a problem until it’s solved.

1 2 3 4 5
12. I give up easily.

1 2 3 4 5
What do you feel your strengths are in terms of teamwork?
What might your barriers be in terms of teamwork?
How can you overcome those barriers?
Look back at Article 1 and the questions linked to it again.

Work in groups of 4-5 to compare your answers and choose the best answer for each
question.
62
Team experience
After this activity, consider the following questions:
What factors made the team successful?
1.
2.
3.
What factors hindered teamwork?
1.
2.
3.
What concerns do you have about working in teams during this course?
1.
2.
3.
FUTURE GUIDELINES
On the basis of the exercise and the follow-up discussion, compile a list of team guidelines
which you will need to consider for future teamwork related to university tasks.
1. _________________________________________________________________
2. _________________________________________________________________
3. _________________________________________________________________
4. _________________________________________________________________
5. _________________________________________________________________
63
Quotation marks
• Single quotation marks‘ ’
• Double quotation marks “ ”
British and Australian writing style mostly uses single quotation marks.
APA referencing style, used during this course, uses double quotation marks.
Use quotation marks around someone’s exact words.
e.g. The Australian Style manual says that quotation marks should be used for ‘‘direct
quotations, whether they are sentence fragments, a sentence, or more than one sentence’’.
Or in Harvard style:
e.g. The Australian Style manual says that quotation marks should be used for ‘direct
quotations, whether they are sentence fragments, a sentence, or more than one sentence’.
(Commonwealth of Australia. (2002). Style manual (6th ed.). Milton, Qld: John Wiley & Sons Australia, Ltd.)
Use quotation marks for journal article titles in Harvard style (but not in APA).
Miller, JL 2006, ‘English learners’ dictionaries: an undervalued resource’, TESOL in Context,

vol. 15, no. 2, pp. 30 - 37.
Or in APA style:
Miller, J. L. (2006). English learners’ dictionaries: An undervalued resource. TESOL in

Context, 15(2): 30 - 37.
Use quotation marks around words or phrases introduced by words like entitled,
marked or so-called, or to introduce irony.
e.g. The so-called ‘experts’ marked the files ‘Top Secret’.
Or in APA style:
e.g. The so-called ‘‘experts’’ marked the files ‘‘Top Secret’’.
(http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/2013/02/quotation-mark-uses-other-than-quotes.html)
How would you punctuate this?
Smith where Jones had had had had had had had had had had had the examiners approval.
64
Apostrophes
Apostrophes show possession or shortened forms. They do not show plurals.
e.g. The frog’s recovery – the recovery of one frog.
The frogs’ recovery – the recovery of more than one frog.
It’s – it is
Can’t – cannot
(It is best to avoid shortened forms in academic writing.)
Spot the mistakes in these photos:
65
You will choose one essay topic from the list on p.67 and work on it in a group. Two
references are provided for each topic. You can search for resources together and share
some resources for your reference list, but you must write your own individual essay and
essay plan and add at least two sources of your own to your reference list.
In the last week, you will do a 10 minute group presentation on your essay topic. The
presentation will be pecha kucha style.
That is, each person will present 4 x 30 second slides.
The slides will be timed to change after 30 seconds.
You can choose to do 4 slides in a row for each person, or change presenters each
time.
The main thing is to keep to time.
You must include a title slide and a slide with academic references.
These are not part of the timed 4 x 30 second slides per person.
The oral presentation may incorporate the group’s different responses to the essay
topic.
You should aim to produce a cohesive presentation with good links between each
person’s section.
You will then run a 25 minute workshop on your topic for the rest of the class. You might
need to prepare handouts for this. It is up to you! In the workshop, you should help the rest
of the class to:
 understand why the topic is important

 understand the details of the topic
 have practice in the topic
The rubrics for the essay plan, essay topic and presentation/workshop are near the
start of this handbook. Look at the rubrics before you start work, so that you know what
you are aiming at.
Students at level I and level II can work together.
66
Essay topics and suggested readings for Academic English
N.B. These readings are all available in MyUni at the end of the ‘Course Information’ module.
1. Why does academic honesty matter in academic writing?

Combes, B. (2005). The copy-and-paste culture of the Net Generation: Strategies for dealing with plagiarism.
ACCESS, 19(1): 21-24.
https://search.informit.com.au/documentSummary;dn=036985855160692;res=IELHSS
Evering, L. C., & Moorman, G. (2012). Rethinking plagiarism in the digital age. Journal of Adolescent & Adult
Literacy, 56(1): 35-44. doi: 10.1002/JAAL.00100
http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/JAAL.00100/abstract
2. ‘Let’s eat, Grandma’ or ‘Let’s eat Grandma’? What role do editing and proofreading play in good
academic writing?
Garton, A., & McFarlane, J. (2007). Editing and proofreading skills. In C. Denholm & T. Evans (Eds.),
Supervising doctorates downunder: Keys to effective supervision in Australia and New Zealand (pp. 87-94).
Camberwell, Vic.: ACER Press.
http://search.informit.com.au/documentSummary;dn=362050985541115;res=IELHSS
Mahrer, K. (2004). Proofreading your own work? Forget it! The Leading Edge, 23(11): 1130-1131. doi:
10.1190/1.1825945
http://tle.geoscienceworld.org.proxy.library.adelaide.edu.au/content/gsedge/23/11/1130.full.pdf
3. Discuss the value of academic feedback from a student perspective

Freestone, N. (2009). Drafting and acting on feedback supports student learning when writing essay
assignments. Advances in Physiology Education, 33: 98-102. doi: 10.1152/advan.90127.2008
http://advan.physiology.org/content/ajpadvan/33/2/98.full.pdf
Weaver, M. R. (2006). Do students value feedback? Student perceptions of tutors’ written responses.
Assessment & Evaluation in Higher Education, 31(3): 379-394, doi:10.1080/02602930500353061
http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/02602930500353061
4. Do different academic disciplines have different writing styles?

Arneback, E., Englund, T., & Solbrekke, T. D. (2017). Student teachers’ experiences of academic
writing in teacher education – on moving between different disciplines. Education Inquiry. doi:
10.1080/20004508.2017.1389226
http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/20004508.2017.1389226
Hyland, K. (2008). Genre and academic writing in the disciplines. Language Teaching, 41(4): 543-562.
doi:10.1017/S0261444808005235
http://www2.caes.hku.hk/kenhyland/files/2012/08/Genre-and-academic-writing-in-the-disciplines.pdf
5. What is critical thinking and how important is it for university study?

Davies, M. (2011). Introduction to the special issue on critical thinking in higher education. Higher Education
Research & Development, 30(3): 255-260 http://dx.doi.org/10.1080/07294360.2011.562145O’Sullivan, M., &
Guo, L. (2010). Critical thinking and Chinese international Students: An East-West dialogue. Journal of
Contemporary Issues in Education, 5(2): 53-73. doi: http://dx.doi.org/10.20355/C5NK5Z
6. What is research and how necessary is it for coursework based degrees?

Lupton, M. (2008) Evidence, argument and social responsibility: First‐year students’ experiences of
information literacy when researching an essay. Higher Education, Research & Development, 27(4): 399-414.
doi: 10.1080/07294360802406858
Willison, J., & O’Regan, K. (2007). Commonly known, commonly not known, totally unknown: A framework for
students becoming researchers. Higher Education, Research & Development, 26(4): 393-409.
doi: http://dx.doi.org/10.1080/07294360701658609
67
Week 2

APA referencing guide
Essay planning
68
You have probably already heard the terms ‘plagiarism’ or ‘academic

dishonesty’ in your lectures or course materials. In your previous
studies you may not have had experience with these concepts.
However, when studying at the tertiary level, this is an important issue.
“Academic honesty is an essential component of teaching, learning
and research and is fundamental to the very nature of universities …
All academic dishonesty is unacceptable … including … plagiarism”
(University of Adelaide 2010).
What is plagiarism?
Plagiarism is a concept that is important in referencing within academic writing. At the University of
Adelaide it has been defined as “presenting work that is not your own in any format, without
appropriate attribution or reference to the original source” (University of Adelaide 2010, § 2.1 a i).
Sometimes this is done deliberately where the student intentionally copies another’s work without
acknowledgement. This is called academic dishonesty.
Many times, however, plagiarism can be the result of genuine misunderstanding when new students
are still learning “the scholarly academic conventions for evidence-based, academic writing
associated with the disciplines [they] are studying, including appropriate citing and referencing”
(University of Adelaide 2010, § 1 d).
Lecturers realise that learning how to reference appropriately is a developmental process where you
will improve through experience and feedback. However, they do expect you to begin referencing
from the first assignment and to consciously work on avoiding plagiarism in your writing. If you
plagiarise an assignment because of a misunderstanding, the university will direct you to resources
that will help you learn about plagiarism and referencing, but it will also make a record of what has
happened and you can lose marks for the assignment or be required to resubmit it (University of
Adelaide 2010, § 2.3.1 a).
Types of plagiarism
Specific examples of plagiarism from the University of Adelaide’s Academic Honesty policy include:
a) paraphrasing or copying work that is not your own, without due acknowledgement by way
of reference to the original work
b) adopting the ideas of others, or the structure of an existing analysis, without due
acknowledgement by way of reference to the original source.
Other forms of academic dishonesty that are related to plagiarism are collusion and cheating, which include:
a) submitting work which is the same or substantially similar as another student’s piece of work for
the same assessment task.
b) submitting a piece of work written or answered for you by another person or which you have copied
from another person
c) submitting the same or substantially similar or substantially the same piece of work for assessment
in two different courses, except in accordance with approved study and assessment schemes
(University of Adelaide 2010, § 2.1 a ii & iii, b iii, c iii & iv)
Avoiding plagiarism
The first step to avoiding plagiarism is to understand the essential characteristics of tertiary study
and academic writing. When you are writing at tertiary level, you place yourself into a research
tradition. This means you acknowledge that at least some aspects of what you are writing about
have been dealt with before (McGowan 2005).
69
In the case of essays, you must analyse the question or topic that has been set, and respond to it.
Your response is usually expected to be an ‘argument’ or personal point of view, using information
from the literature (sources) to support that point of view; or you may want to contradict certain points
of view found in the literature (again, supporting your critique by reference to authors whose views
are similar to your own).
As an academic writer you should analyse not only what is said in the literature, but also how it is
said.
If you find certain phrases and sentence structures that are used often by different authors, you can
assume that you can use them too, but make sure you use them to express your own point of view.
Another way to avoid plagiarism is by consistently and accurately using some form of referencing
system. There are many types of referencing systems including the author-date or Harvard system;
APA (American Psychological Association); the number system (as used in Engineering); and the
footnoting system. Schools and disciplines have preferred options regarding which referencing
system to use. It is best to ask your school and check for specific guidelines.
Regardless of which referencing system you use, you will need to acknowledge the source of all
your material in assignments including direct quotes, paraphrased and summarised material.
Various tools are available to university lecturers to detect plagiarism by electronic means. One
available through the University is Turnitin which can be used to identify any text that has been taken
from electronic sources including the Internet, making it possible to detect cheating.
Paraphrasing and summarising

Paraphrasing is when you take the essence of what another writer has said and write this by using
some of the commonly used language ‘chunks’ that make it clear you are re-telling someone else’s
ideas. You must of course, still acknowledge where the original ideas came from by adding a
reference. It is not sufficient to simply change one or two words and present the ideas as if they were
your own.
When summarising, you pick out the main points of a passage, section or chapter. Again, you should
aim to write these by using the language of the discipline in which you are studying, clearly indicating,
by the use of inverted commas (quotation marks) where there is a direct quote. Make sure that every
quotation is copied exactly from the original. Having a clear and careful note making system will also
help you to avoid plagiarism.
When do I not have to acknowledge my sources?

Students often worry that they will be expected to reference or acknowledge absolutely everything
they write in their assignments. They are concerned that this indicates they have no original thoughts
or views on the material.
As mentioned above, academic writing at a tertiary level involves constantly working with material
written by experts in the field, synthesising their ideas and analysing the arguments being presented.
These all require careful referencing. Your originality lies in the choices you make and the way you
analyse and present them.
In each discipline area, however, there are examples of common knowledge material that do not
need to be referenced. Examples include various mathematical and scientific formulae, medical
terms and general concepts in law that are used regularly without reference to the original author.
As you become more familiar with your discipline area and read more widely you will begin to notice
what is considered common knowledge in your discipline and what needs to be referenced.
70
Examples of writing to avoid plagiarism
Original text
The box below contains a passage with information that a student wants to incorporate into his or
her own writing:
The chunk of text known as the paragraph is a series of sentences, all of which relate to a particular point
you want to make. This means that some paragraphs are very long and others are very short. Paragraphs
are usually more than one sentence although a one-sentence paragraph can be electrifying. It is more
common to have four or five sentences bunched together around one idea, and it is considered courteous for
the writer to try and vary the length of those five sentences to assist understanding and prevent reader fatigue
(Fox & Wilkinson 1993, p.8).
Paraphrasing example 1
This box contains one example of the student attempting to incorporate the above ideas:
A paragraph is a series of sentences that relate to a certain point you wish to make. Some paragraphs will
be long and others are short. They are usually more than one sentence long and more commonly have four
or five sentences in them. To be a courteous writer it is important to vary the length of the sentence to assist
the reader to understand and to prevent reader fatigue.
This writing is an example of plagiarism, because there is no indication where the material has come
from. The wording is also very similar to the original with only a few words changed. A lot of phrases
and words have been directly copied from the original with no acknowledgement.
This box contains another attempt to incorporate information from the original passage:
According to Fox and Wilkinson (1993) a paragraph is a series of sentences that relate to a certain point you
wish to make. Some paragraphs will be long and others are short. They are usually more than one sentence
long and more commonly have four or five sentences in them. To be a courteous writer it is important to vary
the length of the sentence to assist the reader to understand and to prevent reader fatigue (Fox & Wilkinson
1993).
Although the writer has attempted to reference here, there is still a considerable amount of
plagiarism. The words used are very similar to the original. It is not sufficient to simply change a word
here or there. When paraphrasing or summarising a passage you must ensure that you are writing
the material in your own combination of words and indicate clearly any sentences or parts of
sentences you are copying.
This box contains a more successful attempt to incorporate the ideas without plagiarising:
According to Fox and Wilkinson (1993), paragraphs are developed around a central concept, incorporating a
number of linked sentences. They suggest that the number of sentences in each paragraph can differ from
one to many, and that sentences should be of varying lengths “…to assist understanding and prevent reader
fatigue” (Fox & Wilkinson 1993, p.8).
71
This writing acknowledges where the ideas came from and the student has used their own word
combinations. The student has clearly indicated where there is a direct quote from the original text
by using inverted commas and including the page number of the original text.
Reference list or bibliography

The final step for avoiding plagiarism is to include a reference list or bibliography at the end of each
piece of assessment, listing all of the sources you have referred to in your assignment. In order to
do this you will need to have all of the bibliographic details (author, date, title of
book/article/journal/website, publisher etc.) of each source you have used. The exact format for this
list will vary from course to course so you will need to check what is expected for each course.
University policies
 Academic Honesty and Assessment Obligations for Coursework Students Policy –
http://www.adelaide.edu.au/policies/230/
 Academic Honesty Coursework students: Academic Dishonesty Procedures –
http://www.adelaide.edu.au/policies/230/
 Assessment for Coursework Programs Policy – http://www.adelaide.edu.au/policies/700/
 Responsible Conduct of Research Policy – http://www.adelaide.edu.au/policies/96/
References
Fox, M & Wilkinson, L 1993, English essentials, Macmillan Education Australia, Melbourne.
McGowan, U 2003, ‘Plagiarism detection and prevention: pedagogical implications for lectures of
first year students’, in D Nulty & N Meyers (eds), 7th Pacific Rim First Year in Higher Education
Conference proceedings, QUT, Brisbane, pp. 1-7.
McGowan, U 2005, ‘Plagiarism detection and prevention: Are we putting the cart before the horse?’,
in A Brew & C Asmar (eds), Higher education for a changing world: proceedings of the 2005
HERDSA conference, Sydney, pp. 287-293.
University of Adelaide 2010, Academic honesty and assessment obligations for coursework students
policy & academic dishonesty procedures, viewed 10 January 2011,
<http://www.adelaide.edu.au/policies/230/>.
Adapted from ALL Learning Guide – Avoiding Plagiarism.
If you require more assistance with Avoiding Plagiarism, please contact the Writing Centre on 8303 5771.
Visit the website for additional resources: www.adelaide.edu.au/writingcentre/
Principal Authors: Helene Hipp & Ursula McGowan 2005 Revised: Donna Velliaris 2008, Maureen Goldfinch 2011
72
Academic referencing
During the course, the system of referencing that we will be using is the American
Psychological Association (APA) style (6th edition). You will be expected to use this style for
the assignment tasks you have during the course. The Writing Centre's APA referencing
guide is printed on the following pages.
Whatever the reference looks like when you download it or see it in another journal
or website, you need to make it fit APA 6th style. This means you may need to change
capital letters, brackets, etc.
For more referencing examples, please see Massey University’s APA Interactive website:
 http://owll.massey.ac.nz/referencing/apa-interactive.php
Other referencing guides are also available from the Writing Centre website:
 http://www.adelaide.edu.au/writingcentrel/referencing_guides/
There is also a useful referencing style comparison sheet:
 https://www.adelaide.edu.au/writingcentre/docs/referencingComparisonSheet.pdf
N.B. Some of the Writing Centre guides reproduced in this handbook use the Harvard Style
found in the Australian Style manual. There are many versions of Harvard Style, and you
will find a variety of other styles used in different disciplines (e.g. Vancouver, Chicago, MLA).
We are using APA sixth edition in this course because it is always consistent and therefore
it is easier for you to check your referencing.
73
WRITING CENTRE
APA Referencing Guide

There are many different Author-Date referencing styles (see the Referencing Comparison Sheet for one
other). This guide is based on the Publication manual of the American Psychological Association.
(In-text citation) in Reference list format

brackets
Electronic media
Journal article viewed online

(Curwin, 2010) Curwin, R. L. (2010). Motivating urban youth. Reclaiming Children and
Youth, 19(1), 35-39. Retrieved from www.reclaimingjournal.com
Sinharay, S., Puhan, G., & Haberman, S. J. (2010). Reporting diagnostic
(Sinharay, Puhan, &
scores in educational testing: Temptations, pitfalls, and some
Haberman, 2010)
solutions. Multivariate Behavioral Research, 45, 553-573.
doi:10.1080/00273171.2010.483382
Website
(American Psychological American Psychological Association. (2010). Ethical principles of
Association, 2010) psychologists and code of conduct. Retrieved from
http://apa.org/ethics/code/index.aspx
Website which changes frequently (with paragraph number in in-text citation)

("Psychology," 2001, Psychology. (2001). Retrieved December 5, 2010, from
para. 12) http://en.wikipedia.org/ wiki/Psychology
Website with no date

(Australian Permanent Australian Permanent Mission to the United Nations. (n.d.). Current issues.
Mission to the United Retrieved from http://www.australiaun.org/unny/resources.html
Nations, n.d.)
Electronic version of a print book

(James, 1890) James, W. (1890). The principles of psychology. New York, NY: Holt.
Retrieved from http://ebooks.adelaide.edu.au
Newspaper or Magazine article viewed online

(Rotherham, 2010) Rotherham, A. J. (2010, October 21). Paging Principal Skinner: Evaluating
school leaders. Time. Retrieved from
http://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599, 2026632,00.html
Online forum or discussion/Electronic mail list/Blog post

(Mather, 2010) Mather, P.-A. (2010, September 24). Re: Medium of instruction for Creole
languages [Online forum comment]. Retrieved from
http://linguistlist.org/sp/get-discussion.cfm?submissionid=2649196
74
Facebook page (publically available page with estimated date)
(Webb, ca. 2010) Webb, D. [ca. 2010]. All about psychology. In Facebook [Profile page]. Retrieved
December 6, 2010, from
http://www.facebook.com/pages/#!/psychologyonline
Emails – see Other Source Types - Personal communication
Periodicals – journals, magazines and newspapers
Journal article with one author

(Habel, 2009) Habel, C. (2009). Academic self-efficacy in ALL: Capacity-building through self-
belief. Journal of Academic Language and Learning, 3(2), A94-A104.
Journal article with two authors

(Warner & Miller, 2015) Warner, R., & Miller, J. (2015). Cultural dimensions of feedback at an Australian
university: A study of international students with English as an additional
language. Higher Education Research and Development,, 34(2), 420-435.
Journal article with six or more authors

(Amsel et al., 2009) Amsel, E., Johnston, A., Alvarado, E., Kettering, J., Rankin, L. & Ward, M.
(2009). The effect of perspective on misconceptions in psychology: A
test of conceptual change theory. Journal of Instructional Psychology,
36, 289-295.
Journal article with eight or more authors

(Crisp et al., 2009) Crisp, G., Palmer, E., Turnbull, D., Nettelbeck, T., Ward, L., LeCouteur, A. ...
Schneider, L. (2009). First year student expectations: Results from a
university-wide student survey. Journal of University Teaching and Learning
Practice, 6(1), 13-26. Retrieved from http://ro.uow.edu.au/jutlp
Magazine article
(Kluger, Sharples, & Kluger, J., Sharples, T., & Silver, A. (2007). What makes us moral. Time, 170(23),
Silver, 2007) 54-60.
Newspaper article with no author

("A second shot," 2010) A second shot at education enriches us all. (2010, October 21). The Advertiser, p.
16.
Books
Book with one author (with city and country for publisher & page number for specific idea or quotation in in-
text citation)
(O’Shea, 2009, p. 6) O’Shea, P. (2009). So you think you can learn: An evidence based guide to improving
learning. Brisbane, Australia: Cadamon.
Book with more than one author (with city and state for publisher)
(Haslam, Reicher, & Haslam, S. A., Reicher, S., & Platow, M. (2010). The new psychology of leadership:
Platow, 2010) Identity, influence, and power. New York, NY: Psychology Press.
75
Book with DOI
(Spolsky & Hult, 2007) Spolsky, B., & Hult, F. M. (2007). The handbook of educational linguistics. doi:
10.1111/ b.9781405154109.2007.x
Book with group/corporation/association/government agency as author

(American Psychological American Psychological Association. (2010). Publication manual of the American
Association, 2010) Psychological Association (6th ed.). Washington, DC: Author.
Book chapter
(Juslin, 2008) Juslin, P. N. (2008). Emotional responses to music. In S. Hallam, I. Cross,
& M. Thaut (Eds.), The Oxford handbook of music psychology (pp.
377-389). New York, NY: Oxford University Press.
Book with several editions

(Fromkin, 2009) Fromkin, V. (2009). An introduction to language (6th ed.). South Melbourne:
Cengage Learning Australia.
Book with a volume number

(McIntosh, Samuels, & McIntosh, A., Samuels, M. L., & Benskin, M. (1987). A linguistic atlas of late
Benskin, 2005) mediaeval English: Vol. 3. Linguistic profiles. New York, NY:
Aberdeen University Press.
Book written in a foreign language (give a translation of the book title only)
(Molinari & Labella, 2007) Molinari, E., & Labella, A. (2007). Psicologia clinica: Dialoghi e confronti
[Clinical psychology: Dialogue and confrontation]. Milan: Springer.
Translated book
(Debray, 2007) Debray, R. (2007). Praised be our lords: A political education (J. Howe,
Trans.). London, England: Verso.
Classics/the Koran/the Bible

(Aristotle, trans. 1912) No entry on reference list
(Qu’ran 22:46)
(2 Timothy 3:14, New International Version)
Other source types
Lecture notes/course materials given online

(Coddington, 2000) Coddington, P. (2000). Internet computing [Lecture notes]. Retrieved from
http://www.dhpc.adelaide.edu.au/education/dhpc/2000/internet.pdf
(Glonek, 2010) Glonek, G. (2010). Session 12: Summary of advanced methods [video].
In Writing and Speaking at Uni: Researcher Education &
Development: Statistics for Research Students (online course,
University of Adelaide, Australia). Retrieved from
https://myuni.adelaide.edu.au
Conference paper
(Falkner, McEntee, Falkner, K., McEntee, J., Palmer, E., & Botten, J. (2008). Establishing an
Palmer, & Botten, 2008) education community of practice. 31st Conference of Higher
Education Research & Development Society of Australasia:
Engaging Communities. Retrieved from
http://www.herdsa.org.au/wp-
content/uploads/conference/2008/media/Falkner.pdf
76
Symposium contribution/Conference presentation
(McGrath, 2009) McGrath, H. (2009, May). An evidence-based positive psychology
approach to student wellbeing. In The First Australian Positive
Psychology in Education Symposium. Symposium conducted at
the meeting of the Australian Positive Psychology Association,
Sydney, Australia.
Thesis
(Leahy, 2009) Leahy, C. (2009). Peer responses to psychologically distressed tertiary students:
The detection of distress and the helping behaviours of student colleagues
from medicine, compared to psychology, law and mechanical engineering
students (Doctoral thesis, University of Adelaide, Australia). Retrieved from
http://digital.library.adelaide.edu.au/dspace/handle/2440/56314
Entry in a dictionary/an encyclopaedia

("Evil, creativity and Evil, creativity and spirituality. (2010). In D. A. Leeming, K. Madden, & S. Marlan
spirituality," 2010) (Eds.), Encyclopedia of psychology and religion (pp. 198-199). New York,
NY: Springer. Retrieved from: http://www.springerlink.com
Personal communication (letters, emails, memos, interviews, telephone conversations)

(M. Augoustinos, personal communication, November 11, 2010) No entry on reference list
Radio or television podcast/broadcast

(Great myths, 2010) Great myths of popular psychology [Audio podcast]. (2010, February 22).
Retrieved from
http://www.abc.net.au/rn/counterpoint/stories/2010/2826814.htm
("False memories," 2010)
False memories [Television series episode]. (2010). In Catalyst. Sydney,
Australia: ABC Television. Retrieved from
http://www.abc.net.au/catalyst/stories/2848614.htm
CD-ROM/DVD/Film/Maps/Pamphlet/Video
("Understanding Drug Understanding Drug Use [Computer software]. (1998). Perth, Australia: WA
Use," 1998) Alcohol and Drug Authority in conjunction with Southern Public Health
Unit.
Patent
(Keller & Dolan, 2004) Keller, E. B., & Dolan, M. J. (2004). U.S. Patent No. 7,653,568. Washington,
DC: U.S. Patent and Trademark Office.
Notes
Order of references
 Put references on the reference list in alphabetical order.
 Put references by exactly the same author/s in chronological order (earliest first) on the reference
list.
 For an in-text reference to two sources with similar or related ideas, put the work that is first on
the reference list first, followed by a semicolon (;) and then the work that is second on the
reference list (alphabetically)
e.g. (Amsel et al., 2009; Habel 2009).
77
Authors/Editors
 For works with no identified author, the in-text reference uses the first few words from the title and
then the year. If the words used are an article or book chapter title, use double quote marks. (See
Newspaper article with no author). Use ‘Anonymous’ only if this is used on the work itself.
 For seven or less authors, write all names in full on the reference list.
 For eight or more authors use the first six authors' surnames and initials on the reference list, then
use '...', and then give the final author’s surname and initials.
 For three to five authors use all authors’ surnames in the first in-text references, and then use only
the first author’s surname and 'et al.'
 For six or more authors always use the first author’s surname and 'et al.' in in-text citations. (See
Journal article with six or more authors).
 For in-text references, use 'and' between surnames in the main text and '&' in brackets.
 Use the abbreviation (Ed.) or (Eds.) in brackets following the name/s to distinguish editor/s (from
author/s). For books with both authors and editors, put the author surname/s first at the start of the
reference, then for the editors put the initial/s first and then the surname/s.
 Works by exactly the same author/s published in the same year are included in the reference list
in alphabetical order by title with a, b, c added to the year in both in-text references and reference
list entries.
Year
 For works with no publication date recorded, use 'n.d.'
 For most websites, the year the site was last updated is sufficient and a retrieval date is
unnecessary. Give a retrieval date for websites which may change frequently, such as Wikis (after
carefully considering the appropriateness of these sources; see Website which changes frequently
& Facebook page).
 The year can be omitted in the second in-text reference within one paragraph.
Titles
 Use italics for journal, book and other whole-source titles. Use regular font style for titles of sections
of sources (e.g. journal articles, book chapters, posts to message boards).
 Use capitals for all words (except 'of' etc) in a journal or series title. Use a capital letter for only the
first word of a book, article, report, chapter or volume title (and any proper nouns). (See examples
of journal article and book chapter).
Publication details
 For unusual source types, include a description immediately after the title. Common descriptions
include: [Demographic map], [CD], [DVD], [Brochure], [Electronic mailing list message], [Web log
message], and for public Facebook pages, [Fan page] or [Group page]. (See Facebook page).
 Include the city and an abbreviation for the state for books or reports published in the US, and the
city and country for books or reports published elsewhere.
 If the publisher is the same as the author, use 'Author' instead of repeating the name.
 If a DOI (digital object identifier) is available, leave out all publication details and use the
abbreviation "doi:" followed by the DOI. (This number can be entered at the website crossref.org/
to access the electronic version of the source.)
 For journals, only include an issue number (in addition to a volume number) if the pages are
numbered from 1 for each issue.
Page/Chapter/Paragraph/Verse/Line numbers
 When quoting or referring to specific ideas, include page numbers where possible.
 Paragraph numbers can be used for electronic sources.
 When available, part / chapter / line / verse numbers can be used instead of page numbers.
Online versions
 Most sources follow the same referencing format for both paper and electronic versions, except
they end with a digital object identifier (DOI) or URL (home page URL of journal/publisher, not
article URL and not database information), and may not include page numbers. (See Journal article
viewed online, Newspaper or magazine article viewed online, Electronic version of a print book).
Sources that do not go in the Reference List – use in-text citations only
 Secondary sources – when someone writes about what someone else said or thought.
In the in-text references, include the name/s of the original author/s followed by the words 'as cited
78
in' and the surname/s and year for the work you actually read e.g. (O’Regan as cited in Habel,
2009, p. A-94). Only put the secondary source (book/article) you actually read in your reference
list.
 Personal communications (e.g. email, letter)
 Classics/the Koran/the Bible
 Private Facebook pages with content only visible to friends – reference as Personal
communication.
 Lecture handouts (not available online) or your lecture notes – find similar ideas in published
sources whenever possible. When not possible, reference as Personal communication.
All the examples in this style sheet are based on:

American Psychological Association. (2010). Publication manual of the American Psychological
Association (6th ed.). Washington, DC: Author.
Other useful resources:

http://www.apastyle.org/apa-style-help.aspx
http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/2010/01/the-generic-reference-who.html
http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/social-media/
30 November 2017
79
The following materials on plagiarism are used with the permission of the author, Dr David
Gardner. David says:
I grant permission for use of parts or all of the materials entitled "Plagiarism and How
to Avoid It" either in their electronic or print format solely for a not-for-profit use with
your own students on condition that my authorship is acknowledged.
We are very grateful to David for letting us incorporate this excellent resource in our
handbook.
Exercise
1. Read either Source Text A or Source Text B.
2. In groups, look at the five student texts, which are essays about Mickey Mouse using the
two source texts. Are any of the students guilty of plagiarism? Why? Why not?
3. Look at the comments on the texts. Can you match each comment to a student text?
4. Look at the two best texts. What makes one of them better than the other?
80
Plagiarism and How to Avoid It © David Gardner, 1999
Source Text A
Mickey Mouse is a well-loved symbol of the greatness of America. He represents a long
carefree era when everything in the world has gone well for the most prosperous nation on
earth. He symbolises the prosperity of Americans throughout a period when they have
dominated the world both economically and politically.
It is significant that a creature often viewed in other countries as a pest to be eradicated can
rise in the United States of America to become a movie star and a household name. This
symbolises the American dream where everyone (including apparently rodents and quite
possibly many other non-human personalities) can expect freedom of speech, freedom of
actions and freedom to make an honest living. It is important to note in this context that the
rise to fame and/or riches of an underdog has long been a popular theme in the folk lore of
western countries in general but of America in particular.
Not content to make a hero out of one rodent, the American public has also idolised Mickey's
partner Minnie. It is interesting to note that Mickey and Minnie frequently demonstrate
behaviour not unlike human courtship behaviour. It is also interesting to note that this
happily unmarried couple remain perpetually in this state of innocent bliss. This state seems
to capture the innocence of childhood that children do not know they have and adults
reminisce about incessantly.
In addition to their role as a platonic couple Mickey and Minnie demonstrate socially
acceptable inter-personal behaviour with their collection of animal friends. These characters
have developed as vehicles for teaching young children the key elements of social behaviour.
Parents of today have grown up on the antics of Mickey Mouse and his friends and are happy
for their children to do so.
It is quite likely that Mickey Mouse originated from a lucky idea by Walt Disney with no
intention to create role models for the young (or the young at heart). However, he has
developed into an important figure in American, and perhaps global, society. He has played
and continues to play an essential part in the formation of well-balanced members of society
both through film and the now international Mickey Mouse Club.
Extracted from: Symbols of America by R.O. Dent 1988 p. 53
81
Source Text B
Mickey Mouse, the charming little mouse from Walt Disney, is known around the
world. He is considered a playful character who often gets into trouble but inevitably
comes out on top. His resourcefulness and wit are regarded as symbolising all that is
best about America and the Americans (Dent 1988). While it is true that Mickey Mouse
symbolises America this should not be regarded as a positive but rather a negative
feature of the small rodent's character.
The fame of Mickey Mouse has spread around the world in the same way that Coca
Cola and MacDonald’s have arrived in even the most obscure corners of the earth. It
has been promoted by the American publicity machine. This is a form of insidious
colonialism that is far more evil than the European colonialism of the past. In their era
the Europeans were unstoppable just as Mickey Mouse and all that follows is
unstoppable. The important difference is that European colonialism was immediately
noticeable and, therefore, more possible to resist.
It is true that European colonialism was not easy to defeat in the short term simply
because it had behind it what was at the time the world's strongest military powers.
Mickey Mouse colonialism has an equal, if not greater, power supporting its advance.
However, it is infinitely more difficult to defeat in the short or long term because it
becomes part of the social fabric of its colonies in a way that earlier versions of
colonialism never could.
For nine tenths of the world Mickey Mouse is not, in fact, the loveable underdog who
manages to succeed in the land of plenty. He is not the role model who shows
children how to interact socially with groups of friends and with individuals of the
opposite sex. He is, by contrast, a dictator who moulds children to social behaviour
patterns which are alien to their society. He fosters rampant consumerism among
nations who are economically unready for it, thus, creating bankrupted dependent
client states. He also contributes to linguistic colonisation.
Despite the claims from within the United States of America it is necessary to view the
effect of Mickey Mouse, and all that followed after him, in a global sense. It is clear
that his role has been as a forerunner for the American colonisation of much of the
world. There are many parts of the world today where culture and society have
suffered irreparably as a result of this colonisation.
Extracted from: Insidious Icons of Our Times by Michel Souris 1990 p. 109
82
Student Text 1
Mickey Mouse is a well loved symbol of the greatness of America because he represents a long
carefree era when everything in the world has gone well for the most prosperous nation on earth.
The fame of Mickey Mouse has spread around the world in the same way that Coca Cola and
MacDonald’s have arrived in even the most obscure corners of the earth. He symbolises the
prosperity of Americans throughout a period when they have dominated the world both economically
and politically. Mickey Mouse has become a movie star and a household name. This symbolises the
American dream where everyone (including apparently rodents and quite possibly many other non-
human personalities) can expect freedom of speech, freedom of actions and freedom to make an
honest living.
While it is true that Mickey Mouse symbolises America this should not be regarded as a positive but
rather a negative feature of the small rodent's character. He has been promoted by the American
publicity machine. This is a form of insidious colonialism that is far more evil than the European
colonialism of the past. In their era the Europeans were unstoppable just as Mickey Mouse and all
that follows is unstoppable. The important difference is that European colonialism was immediately
Mickey and Minnie Mouse demonstrate socially acceptable inter-personal behaviour with their
collection of animal friends. These characters have developed as vehicles for teaching young children
the key elements of social behaviour. Parents of today have grown up on the antics of Mickey Mouse
and his friends and are happy for their children to do so. However, some people think he is not the
role model who shows children how to interact socially with groups of friends and with individuals
of the opposite sex. But he is a dictator who moulds children to social behaviour patterns which are
alien to their society. He fosters rampant consumerism among nations who are economically
unready for it, thus, creating bankrupted dependent client states. He also contributes to linguistic
colonisation.
Is this text guilty of plagiarism? If so, what exactly is wrong?
83
Student Text 2
R.O. Dent says that Mickey Mouse is a well loved symbol of the greatness of America. He
represents a long carefree era when everything in the world has gone well for the most
prosperous nation on earth. He symbolises the prosperity of Americans throughout a period
when they have dominated the world both economically and politically.
Michel Souris says Mickey Mouse, the charming little mouse from Walt Disney, is known
around the world. He is considered a playful character who often gets into trouble but
inevitably comes out on top. His resourcefulness and wit are regarded as symbolising all
that is best about America and the Americans. While it is true that Mickey Mouse symbolises
America this should not be regarded as a positive but rather a negative feature of the small
rodent's character.
R.O. Dent also says that it is significant that a creature often viewed in other countries as a
pest to be eradicated can rise in the United States of America to become a movie star and
a household name. This symbolises the American dream where everyone (including
apparently rodents and quite possibly many other non-human personalities) can expect
freedom of speech, freedom of actions and freedom to make an honest living. It is important
to note in this context that the rise to fame and or riches of an underdog has long been a
popular theme in the folk lore of western countries in general but of America in particular.
Michel Souris also says that the fame of Mickey Mouse has spread around the world in the
same way that Coca Cola and MacDonald’s have arrived in even the most obscure corners
of the earth. It has been promoted by the American publicity machine. This is a form of
insidious colonialism that is far more evil than the European colonialism of the past. In their
era the Europeans were unstoppable just as Mickey Mouse and all that follows is
unstoppable. The important difference is that European colonialism was immediately
He also says that for nine tenths of the world Mickey Mouse is not, in fact, the loveable
underdog who manages to succeed in the land of plenty. He is not the role model who shows
children how to interact socially with groups of friends and with individuals of the opposite
sex. He is, by contrast, a dictator who moulds children to social behaviour patterns which
are alien to their society. He fosters rampant consumerism among nations who are
economically unready for it, thus creating bankrupted dependent client states. He also
contributes to linguistic colonisation.
84
Student Text 3
Dent (1988) has said that Mickey Mouse is 'a well loved symbol of the greatness of America'
(p53) who symbolises the best aspects of life from the American viewpoint. In defining this
symbolism he refers to the prosperity and the power, both political and economic, of the
United States of America and its people throughout the last fifty years. He also mentions
the fact that the rise to fame and fortune of a cartoon character, particularly of such a weak
figure as a mouse, is a phenomenon unique to American culture. He links this symbolism
to the aspects of the way of life in America which offer its citizens the freedom to lead their
lives as they please.
Souris (1990) is aware of earlier arguments (Dent 1988) regarding the symbolism of Mickey
Mouse and also comments on this aspect of the cartoon character. He says that the power
of this symbolism when released globally is 'a form of insidious colonialism that is far more
evil than the European colonialism of the past' (p109). It is also much more difficult to
overcome because it integrates itself more fully into the society it invades. Souris (1990)
says that, when taken outside the American context, Mickey Mouse is not a good role model
for children but, in contrast, encourages behaviour which is unacceptable in their own
societies. It is also opined that Mickey Mouse encourages consumerism and facilitates the
establishment of English as a universal language to the detriment of local languages.
85
Student Text 4
Dent (1988) says that Mickey Mouse is 'a well-loved symbol of the greatness of America'
(p.53) who symbolises the best aspects of life from the American viewpoint. In defining this
symbolism he refers to the prosperity and the power, both political and economic, of the
United States of America and its people throughout the period of Mickey Mouse's existence
(approximately the last fifty years). During this period America has increase its status as a
world power through participation in wars and the space race as well as through generous
overseas aid and maintenance of a strong dollar.
Souris (1990) agrees that Mickey Mouse is symbolic of certain features of American life,
however, he takes a more negative view of this symbolism which he sees as 'a form of
insidious colonialism that is far more evil than the European colonialism of the past' (p109).
He argues that the European colonialism of the nineteenth century was easier to combat
whereas the insidious 'Mickey Mouse colonialism’ (p109) is much more difficult to overcome
because it integrates itself more fully into the society it invades. It is important to note that
while Dent (1988) refers only to the American context Souris (1990) extends his arguments to
a global context.
Dent (1988) says that the rise to fame and fortune of a cartoon character, particularly of
such a weak figure as a mouse, is a phenomenon unique to American culture. He links this
symbolism to the aspects of the way of life in America which offer its citizens the freedom to
lead their lives as they please. This freedom is guaranteed under the American constitution
and is, therefore, an important feature of life in America. Souris (1990) does not dispute this
argument but says that, when taken outside the American context, Mickey Mouse is not a
good role model for children but, in contrast, encourages behaviour which is unacceptable
in their own societies. Souris (1990) also says that Mickey Mouse encourages consumerism
and facilitates the establishment of English as a universal language to the detriment of local
languages.
86
Student Text 5
Dent (1988) claims with little evidence that Mickey Mouse is 'a well loved symbol of the greatness
of America' (p53) who symbolises the best aspects of life from the American viewpoint. In
attempting to define this symbolism he refers to the prosperity and the power, both political and
economic, of the United States of America and its people throughout the period of Mickey Mouse's
existence (approximately the last fifty years). During this period America has increased its status as
a world power through participation in wars and the space race as well as through generous
overseas aid and maintenance of a strong dollar.
Souris (1990) agrees that Mickey Mouse is symbolic of certain features of American life; however,
he takes a more negative view of this symbolism which he shows is 'a form of insidious colonialism
that is far more evil than the European colonialism of the past' (p109). He demonstrates that the
European colonialism of the nineteenth century was easier to combat, whereas the insidious
'Mickey Mouse colonialism' (p109) is much more difficult to overcome because it clearly integrates
itself more fully into the society it invades. It is important to note that while Dent (1988) refers only
to the American context, Souris (1990) shows that the arguments extend inevitably to a global
context.
Dent (1988) suggests that the rise to fame and fortune of a cartoon character, particularly of such a
weak figure as a mouse, is a phenomenon unique to American culture. He attempts to link this
symbolism to the aspects of the way of life in America which appear to offer its citizens the freedom
to lead their lives as they please. This freedom seems to be guaranteed under the American
constitution and is, therefore, considered as an important feature of life in America. Souris (1990)
does not dispute this argument but makes clear that when taken outside the American context,
Mickey Mouse is not a good role model for children but, in contrast, encourages behaviour which
is unacceptable in their own societies. Souris (1990) also shows that Mickey Mouse encourages
consumerism and wider use of the English language. It seems likely that Mickey Mouse has
contributed to the establishment of English as a universal language to the detriment of other
national languages.
87
COMMENTS ON THE TEXTS
Match the comments to the appropriate texts
TEXT ___
COMMENTS
This is the worst possible kind of plagiarism. It 'steals' large chunks of text from both the
source texts without any acknowledgement. In fact, very little of this text is written by the
student writer. It is mostly copied from the sources although the order has sometimes been
changed. In addition, some of the pieces of copied text are used in a way that does not make
clear the original view of the author. For example, the second sentence (beginning "The
fame of...") is taken from source text B where it is used to express a negative view of the
spread of Mickey Mouse's fame. However, the way it has been incorporated here (i.e. out of
context) it tends to reinforce the positive view expressed by source text A.
OUTCOME
The writer of this text would at least be asked to re-write the assignment. If it was a repeat
offence the writer might be asked to leave the course.
TEXT ___
COMMENTS
This text indicates the sources of information used. Also the text has been structured
reasonably well so that the relevant points from each source appear together. However,
there are two main faults. Firstly, it is not clear from the text how much of it is directly copied
and how much is paraphrased. In fact, if we look carefully we see that virtually the entire text
is copied from one or other of the sources. This is far too much direct
copying. Secondly, the writer has added nothing. There are no explanations, comparisons,
contrasts or opinions about what the sources say. The writer has done a minimal job and is
still guilty of plagiarism because there is no indication of direct copying (and there is too
much copying anyway).
OUTCOME
The teacher may ask the writer to resubmit the work or may award a low (or even fail) grade.
TEXT ___
COMMENTS
This text indicates its sources in a correct manner and we can see from studying the original
texts that most of the time it is not copying directly but paraphrasing the information. On the
two occasions when direct copying takes place it is done correctly. The paraphrasing has
allowed the writer to show an understanding of the source texts, for example, we see that
the writer has clearly understood the contrastive nature of the two sources.
88
As descriptions of what the writer has read in the sources these two paragraphs are well
written. However, they do not go far enough. The writer has not exploited the contrast to the
full, has included almost no explanation of points and has included absolutely no opinion.
OUTCOME
As a well written text covering the main points of the topic this text would receive an average
mark. After spending a lot of time producing well polished sentences the writer would be
disappointed with this mark. To do better the writer needs to demonstrate an ability to
manipulate the information.
TEXT ___
COMMENTS
This text acknowledges its sources correctly and clearly indicates which pieces are copied
directly and which pieces are paraphrased. The second half of the final sentence of the piece
appears to be a paraphrase, however, it tends to attribute more to Souris than he actually
wrote. It is, rather, an interpretation and extrapolation of what Souris wrote.
The structuring of the text is good. Related views from different sources (either agreeing or
disagreeing) are linked together. The links are indicated by "Souris (1990) agrees......,
however,..." and also by "Souris (1990) does not dispute this information but..."
In addition, some explanations are added where the writer feels the audience may need
further clarification. Some examples of this are:
-the last sentence of paragraph one
-the use of "nineteenth century" to clarify "in the past" in paragraph two
-the third sentence in paragraph three
The only thing missing from this text is that the writer expresses no views about the points
of information. In fact the second half of the final sentence might be an opinion which the
student writer has (perhaps shyly and certainly wrongly) attributed to a published source.
OUTCOME
This text is well written and uses the source texts correctly. It also structures the information
well. It should receive an above average mark.
TEXT ___
COMMENTS
This is a well written text. It acknowledges its sources and shows clearly which pieces have
been copied directly. The final sentence reflects more clearly how much is attributable to
Souris and how much is the student writer’s own opinion.
It explains points which may need further clarification and shows clearly contrasts between
the different source authors' views.
Most importantly, it includes the views of the writer. These views are not expressed clumsily
in terms of "My opinion is..." but rather in the subtleties of how the views of the different
source authors are represented. For example, in the first sentence "Dent (1988) claims with
little evidence....". This shows that the writer is reporting what Dent has said but does not
89
find it convincing. The best way of seeing how the writer's opinion has been included is to
compare text 5 with text 4. The texts are identical except for the changes shown in Table 1
(and the final sentence). All of these changes reflect the writer's opinion about the
information from his sources.
Table 1: Differences between the two best texts
Text ___ Text ___
90
Where would you put colons or semicolons in these sentences?
1. For her birthday, she asked for a diamond bracelet with emeralds and rubies a new
car with an electric motor and a swimming pool.
2. You shouldn’t eat so much ice cream you’ll get stomach ache.
3. I really like beef with mushroom sauce pasta with Alfredo sauce and salad with
French dressing.
4. There are two choices at this time run away or fight.
5. You need new brakes otherwise, you may not be able to stop in time.
6. Star Trek was my favourite television show during the 1960s in fact, it is my favourite
television show of all time.
7. I had a huge meal however, I am already hungry again.
8. We knew who would win the game the Portuguese team.
9. He wanted to see three cities in Italy Rome, Florence and Venice.
10. There are six assessments in this course an online punctuation quiz an online
grammar quiz based on subject/verb agreements and sentence fragments an online
academic honesty and plagiarism quiz an essay plan a group oral presentation and
workshop and a final essay.
Sentences mostly from http://examples.yourdictionary.com/examples-of-colons-and-semicolons-in-

sentences.html
N.B. Use semicolons when a list comes at the end of a sentence. Do not use semicolons to
separate a list that appears in the middle of a sentence.
e.g.
The authors included Richard Warner, the well-known authority on grammar and
academic writing; Kayoko Enomoto, an expert on Japanese teaching and cooking;
and Julia Miller, better known as Ms Parrot, the grammar detective.
This is ok, because the list ends the sentence.
If the list comes in the middle of a sentence, don’t use semicolons:
academic writing; Kayoko Enomoto, an expert on Japanese teaching and cooking;
and Julia Miller, better known as Ms Parrot, the grammar detective, who all
contributed to the article. X
academic writing, Kayoko Enomoto an expert on Japanese teaching and cooking,
and Julia Miller, better known as Ms Parrot, the grammar detective, who all
contributed to the article. 
91
At some point in your university study, you may be asked to review the literature on a certain
subject or in a particular area. Such a review involves comparing different writers’ ideas or
perspectives on a topic and evaluating these ideas, all in relation to your own work. A
literature review differs from an article review in that it involves writing about several writers’
ideas, rather than evaluating a single article. It is also different to an annotated bibliography,
which is usually a series of short reflections on individual pieces of writing.
Introduction
The literature review enables you and your reader to get an overview of a certain subject, so that it
is clear who the main writers are in the field, and which main points need to be addressed. It should
be an evaluative piece of writing, rather than just a description. This means that you need to weigh
up arguments and critique ideas, rather than just providing a list of what different writers have said.
It is up to you to decide what the reader needs to know on the topic, but you should only include the
main pieces of writing in this area; a literature review does not need to include everything ever written
on the topic. The most important thing is to show how the literature relates to your own work.
You may be writing a literature review as part of a thesis, or as an exercise in itself. Whatever the
reason, there are many benefits to writing a literature review. It provides an opportunity to:
 identify a gap in previous research
 outline the main arguments in your field
 show that you are familiar with the literature on your topic
 indicate who the main writers are in a particular area
 evaluate previous studies
 position your work in relation to other writers
 identify areas of controversy
 support your own work by citing other authors
 highlight current literature and use older sources where relevant
 see what previous methodologies have been used and to avoid making the same mistakes
as previous researchers
 demonstrate that you can do research
 avoid plagiarism and demonstrate your referencing skills
 provide a clear theoretical framework
 demonstrate your understanding of the key ideas and concepts in your topic
 define your terms, drawing on other writers’ definitions
 make you more confident that your area of research is worth studying
(adapted from Bruce 2002; Clerehan 1999; CQ University 2010; Leedy & Ormrod 2005; Littrell 2003; Roberts
& Taylor 2002; Study and Learning Centre, RMIT 2005; Swales & Feak 1994)
What to include
There are many types of literature that you could include in a review, but as far as possible you
should use primary sources. i.e. you should refer to original works, rather than using secondary
sources in which you read someone else’s opinion of a work. Remember that you are talking about
what other people have written about a topic, so the topic itself is your main focus, rather than
the writer. Everything should always relate clearly to your own research question.
You should explain clearly why you have chosen to review certain pieces of literature and not others.
Are the writings you have chosen the main works in this area, for example, or do they exemplify a
particular methodology which you will use in your own research project? In general, you should only
include academic sources. It can be hard to tell whether a piece of writing is academic or not,
especially if you find it on the Internet.
92
Academic sources checklist
Source Yes No
Is the article peer reviewed/refereed? i.e. Have other scholars in the field
recommended that it be published? Journals and conference proceedings will
usually state whether their articles are peer reviewed.
Is there a reference list/bibliography, with matching in-text references?
Who is the author? Are they linked to a university or a research institute, or possibly
a government department (such as the Australian Bureau of Statistics)?
Does the text look academic? An academic website will usually only have
advertisements to academic products such as books or dictionaries, rather than to,
say, holiday websites.
Is the text written in formal language?
Does the text use paragraphs and headings?
Who is the publisher? Are they academic (e.g. xxx University Press)?
If you are using a website, is there an author and a copyright date (often at the
bottom of the page)?
(based on Monash University, 2011)
How to conduct the literature review

1. Select your topic (usually in conjunction with a lecturer or supervisor)
2. Put your topic into a context. What background needs to be included? Where does your topic
fit into the wider context of research in the area?
3. Search for relevant information:
 Examine the keywords of your question/topic: exactly what do you need to know?
 Identify themes in your topic
 Isolate keywords for these themes together with their synonyms
 Decide which types of literature best address your themes
 Search for literature
- Library databases and Summon
- Google Scholar
- Lecturers’ recommendations
- Friends’ suggestions
- Bibliographies and reference lists at the end of books or articles
 Identify key authors if possible (through reference lists or by seeing which articles are
cited most on Google Scholar)
4. Keep a record of all your references, using the style you will use in your final review
5. Always relate all your literature to your research question, essay or report
(The above points are based on CQ University, 2010 and Leedy & Ormrod, 2005)
How to take notes of your literature

Some writers find it helpful to make a table of all their sources, varying the headings to suit their own
work and discipline.
Example 1: Sciences/Experimental focus

Author Year Type of study Sample Design Data collection Key findings
approach
e.g. quantitative
e.g. qualitative
(Roberts & Taylor, 2002)
93
Example 2: Humanities/Theoretical focus
Author Year Type of work Strengths Weaknesses Relevance to own study
Journal article Range of Lack of depth Similar ideas but too wide
issues ranging
How to organise the review

As with any piece of writing, your literature review should include an introduction and a conclusion.
After that, it is up to you how you group your literature. Remember, your focus should usually be on
the topic you are reviewing, rather than on individual writers. That means that you can group the
pieces of literature in order to make particular points, and you can refer to individual writers more
than once in the review. The choices are limitless, but here are a few ideas. You could group by:
 main themes
 methodology
 theories
 types of study
 main writers in the field
 chronology (i.e. development of theories over the years)
(based on Cone & Foster, 1993, p. 108, and Leedy & Ormrod, 2005, p. 79)
Remember to state your goals clearly in the introduction, and address them again in the conclusion.
Above all, always relate your research to the literature under discussion.
For online tutorials and an excellent example of a literature review, visit these sites:
https://emedia.rmit.edu.au/learninglab/content/literature-review-overview
http://libguides.library.cqu.edu.au/content.php?pid=9872&sid=64790
References
Bruce, C. (2002). Supporting literature reviews: materials for supervisors to use with students.
Retrieved from http://www.uts.edu.au/oth/first/members/tools/litreview/index.html
Clerehan, R. (1999). Reviewing the literature. Monash University, Melbourne. Retrieved from
www.monash.edu.au [Password access only.]
Cone, J.D. & Foster, S.L. (1993). Dissertations and theses from start to finish. Washington, DC:
American Psychological Association.
Central Queensland University (2010). Literature review tutorial. Retrieved from
http://libguides.library.cqu.edu.au/litreview
Leedy, P.D., & Ormrod, J.E. (2005). Practical research: Planning and design (8th ed.). Upper Saddle
River, NJ: Merrill Prentice Hall.
Littrell, R.F. (2003) The literature review: critically analysing information sources, Retrieved from
http://www.romielittrellpubs.homestead.com
Monash University, (2011). ‘What are academic sources?’, Monash University Library. Retrieved
from http://guides.lib.monash.edu/content.php?pid=146856&sid=1323316
Roberts, K.L., & Taylor, B.J. (2002). Nursing research processes: An Australian perspective. South
Melbourne: Nelson.
RMIT. (2005). Literature review. Retrieved from
https://www.dlsweb.rmit.edu.au/lsu/content/2_AssessmentTasks/assess_tuts/lit_review_LL/inde
x.htm.
Swales, J.M., & Feak, C.B. (1994) Academic writing for graduate students. Ann Arbor, Michigan:
University of Michigan Press.
(N.B. Many of these references were accessed in 2011 and may no longer be available. Former versions of
APA included the access date, but APA 6th does not.)
94
Essay planning
Brainstorming
Brainstorming means producing ideas related to a theme. You can write the ideas down in
any order.
Here is a possible brainstorm for the chocolate essay, done in the form of a mind map:
Note that the central focus (the essay question) has several boxes linked to it which
represent the writer’s first ideas. Other boxes are then added. A brainstorm like this is
organic; it does not necessarily stop growing - you can add, remove or reorganise it as you
wish.
If you like to put more system into your brainstorm, use a step-based model like this:
Step 1
Time yourself for the first draft of your mind map
Set a fixed time for this drafting from your base topic/question and stick to it.
Step 2
Look critically at your draft
Which ideas could you develop or remove? Is there a balance of ideas?
Step 3
Think about ordering
Which issues might you tackle first in your essay and why?
95
Step 4
Anticipate readers’ needs
Are there any words and/or phrases that might need explaining? If so, when is the best
time in the essay to do this?
Step 5
Move
Once you have brainstormed your ideas and done some initial research, start putting them
into a logical order as part of the essay planning process. Brainstorming helps you to see
what you know about the topic. Researching will give you more depth. Brainstorming,
researching and planning are cyclical, which means that each process helps the other
processes and you might want to do each process more than once.
Brainstorming
Planning Researching
In the first instance, it is important to distinguish between planning and a plan.

 Planning is an ongoing process, from when you receive the essay title to when you submit
your final draft.
 A plan is a physical outline of the way you intend to conceptualise, structure and present
your ideas.
Plans can be structured/restructured at any time during the planning process.
At this point it is time to write your first plan. However, do not stop doing research yet.
You will find new things to add before your essay is complete.
Example 1: First plan before research (linear style)
Title: “Chocolate is a healthy food.” Discuss.
Introduction
Context for paper – popularity of chocolate.
Issue – whether chocolate is a healthy food is questionable.
Thesis – chocolate may be enjoyable but not healthy.
Scope – (only 4 aspects are covered in our example in order to keep it short)
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4 aspects:
Positive: Can have a positive impact on mood
Positive: Possible health benefits for cardiovascular system
Negative: Chocolate can be seen as a drug rather than a food
Negative: Potential correlation between over-consumption of chocolate and obesity
Main body
Paragraph 1
Ways in which chocolate can have a positive impact on mood. (I need to find academic
sources to support this.)
Is the chocolate + improved mood scenario measurable/transient?
(Evidence needed for this.)
Paragraph 2 - The writer poses questions. This gives direction to their reading.
Possible benefits of chocolate on cardiovascular health – how much/what type(s) of

chocolate have benefit? (Sources needed to help answer these questions.)
Problems with measuring correlation between chocolate consumption and cardiovascular
health. (Sources needed to help answer this.)
Paragraph 3
Chocolate best viewed as a food or a drug.
Indulgence or addiction – are the boundaries unclear? (See what external sources have to
say on this.)
Medication elements of chocolate? (Readings needed around this issue.)
Paragraph 4
The correlation between chocolate and obesity.
(Definition of obesity needed.)
What does the literature say?
Conclusion - The writer begins with a summary of the four arguments and ends by
reaffirming the thesis statement.
Summary of four arguments presented
Chocolate is not a healthy food, but it is enjoyable nevertheless.
Example 2: Developing an essay plan after research (linear style)
Introduction
Scope – (only 4 aspects are covered here to keep the example short)
Positive: Can positively impact on mood
Negative: Potential correlation between over-consumption of chocolate and obesity
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Main body
Paragraph 1 with possible sources
Ways in which chocolate can impact positively on mood. ‘Feel good effect’-Parker, Parker
and Brotchie (2006), Scholey and Owen (2013), Macht and Dettmer (2006) and Macht and
Mueller (2007).
Is the chocolate and improved mood scenario measurable/transient? Parker, Parker and
Brotchie (2006) – chocolate mood effects do not last. Macht and Dettmer (2006) –
anticipation effect and more studies needed.
Paragraph 2
chocolate have benefit? (Sources needed to help answer these questions.)
Problems with measuring correlation between chocolate consumption and cardiovascular
health. (Sources needed to help answer this.)
Paragraph 3
Indulgence or addiction – are the boundaries unclear? (See what external sources have to
say on this)
Medication elements of chocolate? (Readings needed around this issue.)
Paragraph 4
(Definition of obesity needed.)
What does the literature say in relation to other causal factors?
Conclusion
Summary of four arguments presented.
Example 3: Developed essay plan (linear style)
Introduction
Scope – (only 4 aspects are covered here to keep the example short)
Positive: Can positively impact on mood
Negative: Potential correlation between over-consumption of chocolate and obesity.
Main body
Paragraph 1
Ways in which chocolate can impact positively on mood. ‘Feel good effect’ – Parker, Parker
and Brotchie (2006), Scholey and Owen (2013), Macht and Dettmer (2006) and Macht and
Mueller (2007).
98
Is the chocolate and improved mood scenario measurable/transient? Parker, Parker and
Brotchie (2006) chocolate mood effects do not last. Macht and Dettmer (2006) – anticipation
effect and more studies needed.
Paragraph 2 – the focus has changed from the original idea due to lack of research data

chocolate have benefit? Can provide heart-friendly flavanols (Hannum, Schmitz, & Keen,
2002) – helps with blood clotting and is anti-inflammatory (Schramm et al., 2001)
Maximising benefits of chocolate lies in minimising fat levels (Hannum, Schmitz, & Keen,
2002). Current processes destroy flavanols (Hannum, Schmitz, & Keen, 2002).
Paragraph 3 – note the narrow focus of medical benefits (i.e. only considering magnesium)
due to short length of essay

Indulgence or addiction – are the boundaries unclear? Chocolate contains some biologically
active ingredients, but in small amounts (Bruinsma & Taren, 1999). ‘Chocolate addicts’ –
negative correlation: chocolate consumption and mood (Macdiramid & Hetherington, 1995)
but chocolate cravings sensory rather than addictive (Bruinsma & Taren,1999).
Medication elements of chocolate? Used in relation to magnesium deficiency in women
(Pennington, 2000 in Steinberg et al., 2003). Findings concur with Abraham and Lubran
(1981) who found a correlation between magnesium deficiency and nervous tension in
women.
Paragraph 4 – note the findings show that there is no clear relationship between chocolate
and obesity – this was suggested in the introduction.

No specific correlation found in literature (Beckett, 2008; Lambert, 2009). Typified by
Mellor’s (2013) findings – adults showed no weight increase after chocolate controlled diet.
Lambert (2009) exemplified that chocolate consumption alone unlikely to precipitate obesity.
‘Chocoholic’ more likely to consume other sweet foods and less likely to exercise as much
as others. Chocolate consumption thus marginal in causes of obesity.
Conclusion
Summary of four arguments presented
99
Your essay plan
Write a plan for your essay. Each person should work individually to create their own plan.
Your plan should be like the following example, using the template below (also on MyUni).
Your plan should include at least 3 academic sources (or 5 sources if you are at level II).
Please include the sources (authors’ names, year and page number if necessary) at the
appropriate places in the text and give the complete references in a list at the end. This
reference list will be part of your word count. You may use dot points in your plan.
The plan should be uploaded to MyUni by midnight on Thursday, Week 3.
Please adapt this template as necessary. Add extra paragraphs if you need to, and
remember to use in-text references and a reference list in APA (6th edition) style. The
references are part of the total word count (700-1000 words and at least 3 sources for level
I and IAP students; 800-1200 words and at least 5 sources for level II students).
N.B. ‘Supporting evidence’ does not mean the points must agree with the essay title; it means
the points must provide evidence for the arguments in each topic sentence.
Essay title
Introduction General
introductory
remarks
Thesis statement
Paragraph 1 Topic sentence
Supporting
evidence
Supporting
evidence
Supporting
evidence
Supporting
evidence
Conclusion Summary of main

ideas
Concluding
remarks/
recommendations
References (in full)
100
Essay plan example using the template
Introduction General Since Spanish explorers brought back chocolate from the new
introductory world, chocolate consumption has become popular all over the
remarks world.
However, it is questionable whether chocolate is healthy.
1. Chocolate has chemical properties that can influence mood and
it may have a positive impact on cardiovascular health.
2. Chocolate can be viewed as a drug rather than a food.
3. Possible correlation between over-consumption of chocolate
and obesity.
Thesis It will be argued that despite chocolate’s positive effect in some
statement/ cases on mood and the cardiovascular system, it has also been
scope linked to addiction and obesity and is therefore not a healthy food.
Paragraph 1 Topic sentence Consumption of chocolate is something that many enjoy, and there
is evidence (Parker, Parker, & Brotchie, 2006) that high
carbohydrate foods such as chocolate do have a ‘feel good’ effect.
Supporting For:
evidence  Scholey and Owen (2013) - systematic literature review -
several studies, such as Macht and Dettmer (2006) and
Macht & Mueller (2007), appear to confirm this effect.
Against:
 The mood effects of chocolate are not long-lasting (Parker,
Parker, & Brotchie, 2006).
 Mood is hard difficult to isolate and quantify, and aside from
the study by Macht and Dettmer (2006) there appears to
be little research on any longer term mood affecting
influences of chocolate.
 Macht and Dettmer (2006) found that positive responses to
chocolate correlated more with anticipation and temporary
sensory pleasure, whereas guilt was also a statistically
significant factor for many, for whom the ‘feel-good’ effect
would be minimalised.
Paragraph 2 Topic sentence Another possible positive influence of chocolate is upon

cardiovascular health.
Supporting Chocolate can be a provider of significant quantities of heart-
evidence friendly flavanols (Hannum, Schmitz, & Keen, 2002) which help in
delaying blood clotting and reducing inflammation (Schramm et al.,
2001).
But: Most cocoa products are made through an alkali process
which destroys many flavanols (Hannum, Schmitz, & Keen, 2002).
Paragraph 3 Topic sentence The biological makeup of chocolate is also relevant in determining
whether chocolate is better viewed as a food or a drug, but the
boundaries between indulgence and addictive behaviour are
unclear.
Supporting Food: Bruinsma and Taren (1999) - eating chocolate can
evidence represent a sensory reward based, luxurious indulgence, based
around texture, aroma and flavour anticipation, rather than a
neurochemically induced craving.
Drug: Chocolate contains some biologically active elements
including methylxanthines, and cannabinoid-like unsaturated fatty
acids (Bruinsma & Taren, 1999) which could represent a
neurochemical dependency potential for chocolate, yet are present
in exceedingly small amounts.
101
Paragraph 4 Topic sentence A final point to consider in relation to chocolate is the perception
that chocolate is linked to obesity.
Supporting Define obesity.
evidence The literature on chocolate and obesity has clearly demonstrated
that there are no specific correlations between the two variables
(Lambert, 2009). E.g. Mellor (2013)
As Lambert (2009) notes, chocolate consumption alone is not likely
to cause obesity, unless large amounts of other fattening foods are
consumed and the person’s activity level does not burn up these
extra calories.
‘Chocoholics’ often eat more sweet foods and exercise less.
Conclusion Summary of No proven link between obesity and chocolate consumption.
main ideas Many chocolate focused arguments in this essay - the transient
effect of chocolate on mood; chocolate is as likely to create
feelings of guilt as of well-being.
Another possible positive dimension to chocolate is a correlation
with cardiovascular health. Yet the potential benefits of flavanols
in chocolate are currently offset by the high fat/carbohydrate
content of most forms of chocolate.
Not clear, therefore, if chocolate is a food or a drug.
Concluding It can therefore be said that chocolate is not a healthy food, but
remarks/ can be enjoyed as part of a healthy and balanced diet and lifestyle.
recommendation
Word count for plan: 586 words (or 621 including rubric headings)
References
Bruinsma, K., & Taren, D. L. (1999). Chocolate: Food or drug? Journal of the American Dietetic
Association, 99(10), 1249-12. doi: 10.1016/S0002-8223(99)00307-7
Hannum, S. M., Schmitz, H. H., & Keen, C. L. (2002). Chocolate: A heart-healthy food? Show me
the science! Nutrition Today, 37(3), 103-109. Retrieved from
http://journals.lww.com/nutritiontodayonline/Abstract/2002/05000/Chocolate__A_Heart_health
y_Food__Show_Me_the.4.aspx
Lambert, J. P. (2009). Nutrition and health aspects of chocolate. In S. Beckett (Ed.), Industrial
chocolate manufacture and use, (4th ed., pp. 623-635). London: Wiley Blackwell. Retrieved from
http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/9781444301588.ch27/pdf
Macht, M., & Dettmer, D. (2006). Everyday mood and emotions after eating a chocolate bar or an
apple. Appetite, 46(3), 332-336. doi: 10.1016/j.appet.2006.01.014
Macht, M., & Mueller, J. (2007). Immediate effects of chocolate on experimentally induced mood
states. Appetite, 49(3), 667-674. doi:10.1016/j.appet.2007.05.004
Parker, G., Parker, I., & Brotchie, H. (2006). Mood state effects of chocolate. Journal of Affective
Disorders, 92(2), 149-159. doi: 10.1016/j.jad.2006.02.007
Scholey, A., & Owen, L. (2013). Effects of chocolate on cognitive function and mood: A systematic
review. Nutrition reviews, 71(10), 665-681. doi:10.1111/nure.12065
Schramm, D. D., Wang, J. F., Holt, R. R., Ensunsa, J. L., Gonsalves, J. L., Lazarus, S. A., Schmitz,
H. H., German, Bruce, J., & Keen, C. L. (2001). Chocolate procyanidins decrease the
leukotriene-prostacyclin ratio in humans and human aortic endothelial cells. The American
Journal of Clinical Nutrition, 73(1), 36-40. Retrieved from
http://ajcn.nutrition.org/content/73/1/36.full
102
Word count for references: 214 words
Total word count: 800 words (or 835 including rubric headings)

Do you need an em dash, an en dash, a hyphen or nothing? Where would you insert the
appropriate punctuation mark?
1. eticket
2. 2001—2008
3. Hot chocolate, especially if you want it to be frothy, needs to be made in a blender.
4. from 2015 to 2016
5. Meet me at the check in counter.
6. I have to check in at 5 pm.
7. There is one punctuation mark that is longer than all the others the em dash.
Where to find dashes in Word
103
Use the APA guide on pp. 70-75 or the APA interactive website
(http://owll.massey.ac.nz/referencing/apa-interactive.php) to answer these questions:
1. How do you refer to two references by the same author in the same year?
2. Do you put personal communications (e.g. an email from an author) in the reference list?
3. Do you put journal article titles in italics?
4. Do you use capitals for most words in an journal article title?
5. What is the difference between an author and an editor?
6. What do you write if you cannot find a date for a reference?
7. Which reference(s) in this example go(es) go in your reference list? Hint: The reference
from Smith here is called a ‘secondary source’.
Smith (2006, as cited in Jones, 2009) says that chocolate is healthy.
8. Does the volume number of a journal go in normal font or italics in APA?
9. Do you need to give all the authors’ names in the in-text reference if there are four
authors?
10. Do you need to give all the authors’ names in the reference list if there are four authors?
11. Which comes last in the reference: the publisher or the place of publication?
12. Should you list all the references in the reference list chronologically or alphabetically?
13. If you have two authors in an in-text reference, e.g (Smith, 2006; Anderson, 2009), which
one should come first?
14. Which is correct in the text of your essay?
a. Anderson & Miller (2015) claim that chocolate is healthy.
b. Anderson and Miller (2015) claim that chocolate is healthy.
15. Which is correct in the brackets in your essay?
a. Chocolate is healthy (Anderson & Miller, 2015).
b. Chocolate is healthy (Anderson and Miller, 2015).
104
In this course, you will do a 10 minute group presentation on your essay topic, with 5 people
in each group. The presentation will be pecha kucha style with a total of 20 slides. That is,
each person will present 4 x 30 second slides. The slides will be timed to change after 30
seconds. You can choose to do 4 slides in a row for each person, or change presenters
each time. The main thing is to keep to time. You must include a title slide and a slide with
academic references as well as your 20 slides.
You will then run a 25 minute workshop on your topic for the rest of the class. You might
need to prepare handouts for this. It is up to you! Please give your tutor an electronic copy
of the handout two days before the workshop if you need photocopies. In the workshop,
you should help the rest of the class to:
 understand why the topic is important

 understand the details of the topic
 have practice in the topic
e.g. If your topic is ‘Why does academic honesty matter in academic writing?’, the workshop
might:
 introduce the concept of academic honesty

 talk about how academic honesty is viewed in different cultures
 include a quiz with questions relating to academic honesty
 involve a game based on the topic of academic honesty
 give people a list of resources on academic honesty to read and discuss in the
workshop
You can be as creative as you like.
Your presentation and workshop should be based on the research you have done for your
essay topic. Work together for the presentation and workshop, but write your essay plans
and essays individually. You may have a few references that are the same as other people
in your group, but you should have at least one reference that is different in the essay plan
and at least two references that are different in the final essay. You do not have to use the
two references that you were provided with at the beginning.
Before tomorrow’s class, watch the oral presentation skills video on the English for
Uni website. (https://www.adelaide.edu.au/english-for-uni/oral-presentation/ Start at 0:45 seconds)
The two student handouts from the video are on the following pages, together with other
materials and an assessment sheet for you to use for the first student’s presentation.
Be prepared to discuss in class:
1. What features make a good oral presentation?
2. How could you do a good group presentation?
3. What will you include in your workshop?

105
Presentation 1 Student's Handout
106
As you watch the video, use the following sheet to assess the first presenter.
Presentation 1 Assessment
Presenter Good Fair Poor

Pleasant manner
Confidence
Use of slides
Knowledge of subject
Use of notes
Timing
Eye contact
Response to questions
Avoidance of
unnecessary interruptions
Fluency
Volume
Speed
Engagement with topic
Humour
Content
Introduction
Structure and links
Identification of main points
Clarity
Accuracy
Originality of material
Appropriateness of
language
PowerPoint
Size of font
Colour of font
Background of slides
Spelling
Punctuation
Capitalisation
Overall effect
Use of sound
Use of images
Use of technology
Handout
Relevance
Academic style
Usefulness
107
Presentation 2 Student's Handout
Transformational leadership
presented by
Prisca Were
What is leadership?
Leadership is the ability to influence others to achieve organizational goals (Bartol et al., 2003, p.
389). It is “the projection of personality – that combination of persuasion, compulsion, and
example – that makes other people do what you want them to do” (Megginson, Mosely & Petri,
1989, p. 385).
What is transformational leadership?

Transformational leadership is the process of defining the objectives of an organization and
rallying and empowering followers to accomplish these objectives (Yukl, 1994). “Transformational
leaders seek to change the status quo by articulating to followers the problems in the current
system and a compelling vision to what a new organization could be” (Lussier & Achua, 2004, p.
356).
Transformational leadership has 4 dimensions:

 Idealized influence
 Individual consideration
 Intellectual stimulation
 Inspirational motivation
(Bass, 1985, as cited in Yukl, 1994)
What are the characteristics of transformational leaders?

 Risk takers
 Network builders
 Inspirers of trust who also trust others
 Visionaries
(Lussier & Achua, 2004; Kreitner & Kinicki, 1992; Yukl, 1994)
Impact of transformational leadership in the Teachers' Service Commission, Kenya

1965 - 1998: Autocratic/laissez-faire leadership
1998 - date: Transformational leadership, marked by:
 Creation of the TSC logo
 Outlining of the Mission/Vision statements
 Drawing of the 1st ever strategic plan
 Drawing of a service charter
 Renewed focus on staff training
 Computerization of the systems
 Restructuring of the organization
Conclusion
Because transformational leaders have foresight and are able to anticipate change as well as
challenge, they are able to ensure that their organizations stay afloat in the advent of competition.
This has proved to be the case with the TSC.
“The task of the leader is to get his people from where they are to where they have not been.”
Henry Kissinger (Vistar, 2005)
References
Bartol, K., Matthews, G., & Martin, D. (2003). Management: A Pacific rim focus (enhanced edition).
Boston: McGraw-Hill.
Kreitner, R., & Kinicki, A. (1992). Organizational behavior. Boston: Richard D. Irwin, Inc.
Lussier, R. N., & Achua, C. F. (2004). Leadership: Theory, application, skill development (2nd ed.).
Sydney: Thompson.
Megginson, L. C., Mosley, D.C., & Petri, P.H. (1989). Management: Concepts and applications
(3rd ed.). New York: Harper and Row publishers.
Vistar (2005). Vistar. Retrieved September 18, 2006, from http://www.vistar.co.za/.
Yukl, G. (1994). Leadership in organizations (3rd ed.). New Jersey: Prentice Hall.
108
PREPARE
A good speaker should prepare carefully for their talk and be:
P urposeful
R elevant
E nthusiastic
P roficient
A cademic
R eliable
E ngaging
Purposeful Indicate the structure of your talk and give your audience a
clear sense of direction.
Relevant Make your material relevant to the topic and to the
audience.
Enthusiastic Show that you enjoy your subject.
Proficient Maintain control throughout your talk by researching and
preparing your material carefully. Practise using the
equipment in advance, and be ready to answer audience
questions.
Academic Use formal language and ensure that the style and content
of your slides are appropriate.
Reliable Provide sources for your information. Include references
when necessary and be prepared to give your audience a
short bibliography on request.
Engaging Keep your audience's attention by using good eye contact
and delivering your material as a talk, rather than reading
from your notes or reciting from memory. Use unobtrusive
cards for your notes so that they do not hide your face.
PowerPoint slides
 Face the audience, not the screen.
 Point on the machine or with a laser pointer and do not block the image on the
screen.
 Stand to one side, so people can see the screen.
 Give the audience time to read.
 Make sure your font is large enough (e.g. Arial size 24).
 Use a font colour which contrasts strongly with the background of the slide.
 Have a maximum of about 40 words on each slide.
 Use only relevant content.
 Design the slides to support what you are saying, not to hide it.
109
Your oral presentation
Content and structure

 What is your topic?
 What are your key points?
 How can you structure your talk?
 Does your introduction point out the key points and structure clearly?
 How can you make an essay, or detailed notes, into prompts for your talk?
 How much background to the topic does the audience need?
Slides and handouts

 Does the order of the points on your slides match the order of the points in
your talk?
 Do you need to prepare a handout?
 What references should you include on your slides or handouts?
 When should you give the audience your handout?
Audience and delivery

 Can you visit the venue before the presentation, in order to check the
equipment?
 What kind of audience will you be addressing?
 What type of humour is acceptable?
 How is eye contact with different people best maintained?
 How can you make sure you keep to time?
Finally, some tips for overcoming nervousness

 Practise your talk out loud several times and check the timing.
 Arrive at the venue early, set up your presentation if possible and then go for
a short walk or sit quietly to relax.
 Have a glass of water on hand, in case your throat gets dry.
 Control your voice by breathing deeply. If necessary during the talk, stop and
have a drink of water.
Above all, PREPARE!
© Julia Miller, Student Learning Centre,

Flinders University, Adelaide
NB You can find all the worksheets for the oral presentation section, and view the video, at
http://www.adelaide.edu.au/english-for-uni/oral-presentation
110
Reinforcing punctuation
Exercise 1. Can you punctuate this video story text? You may also need to add capital
letters.
Harumi Kaga the television cookery expert was having dinner with Professor Grahamarian
the self-styled grammar expert
They had cheese and chocolate pizza cucumber and chocolate salad and oranges with
spaghetti sauce for dessert they drank red wine with chilli and coffee with banana juice to
finish the meal the meal was very badly cooked they had had better meals at Freds Greasy
Fork café
What a terrible meal exclaimed Harumi I wonder who cooked it that dessert was disgusting
I can think of one chef who might have cooked it Gordon Chan replied Professor
Grahamarian
Yes hes the terrible chef who Harumi stopped speaking as the door to the kitchen slowly
opened
Its Gordon they cried
The door opened further and Bobbie Dylan a famous singer appeared
Hello shall I sing you a song she asked how about one from my 2015 2016 album dedicated
to Gordon Chan its called dont eat here Im a cook out of hell
Exercise 2. Add punctuation to these two references in APA 6th style:
Kaga H & Chan G 2016 Cooks and chefs Adelaide South Australia Aga Publishing Limited
Parrot A & Grahamarian P 2017 Were going dotty A beginners guide to punctuation Crazy
Journals 51 29 45 doi 123456789
Now watch the online punctuation lecture and use the links to check your answers.
111
Week 3
Reporting verbs
Paragraph structure
112
When you write an argument in an essay, you need to make a claim and support it with
evidence. Check whether the ‘evidence’ you use is a fact, an opinion or an assumption.
A fact is something which is supported by impersonal evidence (e.g. The earth is a planet).
An opinion is personal (e.g. I think the earth is a beautiful place).
An assumption makes a statement which is not necessarily personal but is not supported
by evidence (e.g. All fee-paying students are rich).
Exercise: Which of the following are facts, opinions or assumptions? Can you explain
why?
1. All students should proof read their essays carefully.
2. All students proof read their essays carefully.
3. Perfectionist students are likely to waste time when they proof read because they take
too long.
4. Perfectionist students are no more efficient at proof reading than other students
(Stoeber & Eysencks, 2008).
5. Proof reading is a waste of time.
6. Careful proof reading takes time.
7. All students enjoy proof reading.
8. Everyone hates proof reading.
9. Proof reading involves looking at a text carefully and finding errors.
10. Inexperienced administrative staff often supervise professional proof readers

(Wikipedia, 2016).
When you are writing, be careful to give reliable references for facts and to avoid
assumptions.
113
Recognising how a text is organised can help you to follow the writer’s argument.
Text may be organised according to any of the following logical sequences:
cause and effect – discusses contributing factors and their results
chronological order – discusses events in the order that they occurred
comparison and contrast – discusses similarities and differences
critique - a situation or contention is presented, then points for and points against
are made
enumeration – discusses an arbitrarily ordered list of logically divided ideas
generality - discusses ideas starting with the most general and finishing with the
most specific (or in reverse order)
importance – discusses ideas starting with the most important and finishing with the
least important (or in reverse order)
problem solving – outlines a situation, then discusses problems, then discusses

solutions
process/sequence – discusses a pattern of ordered steps
OR some other logical organisation
Signal Words for Text Organisation

The words used to connect ideas in a text can indicate the style of organisation in that text.
Such signal words also often signify that the idea to follow is an important point. Some of
the following material is based on Oshima, A. & Hogue, A. (1991). Writing academic English
(3rd ed). New York: Addison Wesley Longman.
Cause and Effect
e.g. How have climactic changes
generic text outline over the years affected land forms signal words
of eastern Australia?
Cause 1 Rise in temperature at close of ice one cause
age therefore
 Effect 1  melting of Antarctic ice – rise

consequently
resulting in
 Effect 2
in sea level as
 Effect 3
 drowning of coastal river
hence
because
valleys
since
 formation of Bass Strait as a result
contribute to
have an effect on
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Cause 2
 Effect 1
Chronological Order
e.g. Describe the origins of
generic text outline modern day dietetics. signal words
 description at 1st point in time  ancient Greece – treatment by

first
later
 description at 2nd point in time
way of life following this
 description at 3rd point in time

 one-sided and pure study of
next
then
nutrition
finally
 mode of life as a component in 1988
of doctors’ medical activity
Comparison and Contrast
e.g. Compare the musical styles
generic text outline of Debussy and Ravel signal words
Point by Point Comparison:
introduce first point adherence to impressionist ideas
 relate to Debussy
 relate to target A
 relate to Ravel
first
on the other hand
 relate to target B meanwhile
interest in non-classical scales while
introduce second point and harmonies whereas
 relate to Debussy
 relate to target A
 relate to Ravel
 relate to target B
Block Comparison:
 discussion of all aspects of first  Debussy’s music: alternatively

target dreamy similarly
fluid in contrast
 discussion of all aspects of  Ravel’s music:
conversely
second target vivacious
melodious
Critique
e.g. Should euthanasia be
generic text outline legalised? signal words
context Lethal injection for people unlikely
to recover from illness
 lower medical costs

justification
 positive 1
 relief for family
benefit
advantage
 positive 2
 end to suffering
disadvantage
the problem with this
 positive 3
 irreversibility
unfortunately
best
 negative 1
 huge responsibility for doctors
worst
 negative 2
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Enumeration
e.g. The biological effects of
generic text outline radiation signal words
theme 1 the nature of radiation
 sub-theme  radioactive elements another

 example  types of radiation
first
also
in addition
theme 2 sources of radiation in the
next
 example
environment
finally
too
theme 3 effects of radiation at a cellular
 sub-theme
level
Adapted from: Zeegers, P 1998, An

introduction to the study of science at
university, Flinders Press, Adelaide.
Generality
generic text outline e.g. Dietary supplements signal words

general idea carbohydrates one aspect
 more specific idea  complex carbohydrates

an application
more specifically
 most specific idea  starches
overriding
most importantly
 sugars fundamental
Importance
e.g. Discuss themes in
generic text outline Shakespeare’s sonnets. signal words
 least important unit  occasional theme: beauty most importantly

 more important unit  occasional theme: power
also
additionally
 most important unit  occasional theme: love another
a second
 common theme: time and
timelessness
Problem Solving
e.g. Developing a better method
generic text outline for anthocyanin production signal words
Context anthocyanins as natural food
colorings
 
in order to
Problem 1 growth rate is not uniform overcome
 Solution 1  separate fast-growing
to address this
solution
cells option
 Problem 2  variable optimal
an alternative approach
 Solution 2
temperature
 oscillate temperature
throughout growth phase
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Process/Sequence
e.g. Describe the process of grief.
generic text outline signal words
 step 1  shock and denial

first
next
 step 2  anger
following this
then
 step 3  bargaining after
finally
 step 4  depression
 step 5  acceptance
Practice – recognising text organisation and signal words
Skim read the following seven texts and label their organisation.
cause and effect comparison and contrast chronological order

critique importance problem solving process/sequence
A Text Organisation:
The Evolution of Computers
In the relatively short span of sixty years, there has been an incredible evolution in the size and
capabilities of computers. Today, computers smaller than the tip of your fingernail have the same
capabilities as the room-sized machines of years ago. The first computers were developed around
1945. They were so large that they required special air-conditioned rooms. About twenty years later,
in the 1960s, desk-sized computers were developed. This represented a gigantic advance. Before
the end of that same decade, however, a third generation of computers, which used simple
integrated circuits and which were even smaller and faster, had appeared. In 1971, the first
microprocessor, less than one square centimetre in size, was developed.
Oshima, A. & Hogue, A. (1991). Writing academic English (3rd ed). New York: Addison Wesley Longman.
p. 57.
B Text Organisation:
Since the middle of this century, women around the world have been seeking greater independence
and recognition. No longer content with their traditional roles as housewives and mothers, women
have joined together to create the so-called "women's liberation movement". While the forces behind
this international movement vary from culture to culture and from individual to individual, the basic
causes in the United States can be traced to three events: the development of effective birth-control
methods, the invention of labor-saving devices for the home, and the advent of World War II.
p. 105.
C Text Organisation:
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The culture of a country is an integral part of its society, whether it is a remote Indian village in Brazil
or a highly industrialized city in Western Europe. Basically, culture is reflected in a country's
language, literature, art, music, and dance. However, culture also includes the patterned ways in
which people conduct themselves in their relationships with others. Japan and the United States
are two highly industrialized nations in the world. Although their cultures have a few similarities,
there are greater differences between these nations of the East and West.
p. 114.
D Text Organisation:
The Challenges of Overpopulation
World population is increasing at an alarming rate. In fact, according to the United Nations, by the
year 2060, the Earth will have ten billion people. Governments, particularly governments of
developing countries, will face four major challenges to provide for their expanding populations. The
first challenge will be to provide an adequate food supply. Hungry, undernourished people lack the
energy, the time and the will to improve their lives. A second challenge is to build adequate housing.
The population needs access to affordable housing to keep people off the streets. Another challenge
is to provide jobs. Since rural areas provide only limited job opportunities, many people migrate to
the cities in hopes of finding employment. If employment is not available, these people quickly
become burdens on the urban society. The final and most important challenge is to provide education
for all the people. As the population increases, more schools will have to be built, and good teachers
and administrators will have to be trained to operate these schools. Not only do young people need
an education, but adults need training in various skills and trades that will translate into jobs to benefit
themselves and their countries. In conclusion, the challenges of rapid population growth must be
met by all countries, especially developing ones. In my opinion, the most important one is education,
for without education, there can be no progress.
p. 60.
E Text Organisation:
A Neutralisation Experiment
To perform a neutralisation experiment, proceed in the following manner. First, measure about 2 cc
of laboratory NaOH solution. Second, pour the solution into a small casserole. Next add portions of
HCl solution, stirring after each addition until the solution is acid when tested with litmus paper. Then,
place the casserole containing the solution on a wire gauze mat over a Bunsen burner and heat it
until the solution begins to boil. When it does, reduce the size of the flame immediately and allow
the solution to boil gently. As it approaches dryness, sputtering may occur. At this point, cover the
casserole loosely with a watch-glass. Then, hold the casserole above the flame and move it back
and forth until no further water vapour is expelled. Finally, allow the dish and residue to cool.
p. 54.
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F Text Organisation:
One English teacher made the pragmatic comment:
It is too heavy to carry sets of dictionaries into the classroom; I tend to teach lower
levels and it is good to have the same version across the class.
This highlights one of the difficulties of dictionary use and research—the expense and weight of
paper dictionaries can make it physically hard for teachers to use them on a regular basis. An online
version would obviously solve many of these problems, if enough computers were available in a
classroom. Another solution is to ask students to use their mobile phones to link to dictionaries during
the class.
Adapted from Miller, J. (2008). Teachers and dictionaries in Australia: Is there a need to train the trainers?
TESOL in Context, 17(2), 11-19.
G Text Organisation:
If this paper were written two years ago then it does represent a possible, viable option for a lunar
base design. As it stands in 1995 it is a very dated document.
1) This proposal unfortunately does not address the WHY question at all! There is no rationale at all
included in going to the moon and there is not even a discussion about what these people would be
doing there. Supposing a Lunar base that will house 12 people presupposes that they will be doing
something. The problem with this plan is that it does not even begin to discuss that or even begin to
address the costs involved in maintaining that base even if they only sit there twiddling their thumbs.
The logistics of a lunar base would cost a very large amount in this scenario due to the implicit (no
plan for any self-reliance) total dependence on the earth for support.
2) There is no plan for what these folks are going to do or costs of support. See above. There has to
be a REASON for doing this. Just to have people on the Moon does not cut it! In this age of budget
cutting there is no way that the public will support a weak justification for the effort. Also, the scale
of dollars that are mentioned is now within the parameters of private investment. If there is no return
on investment there will be no investment.
There are justifications for going to the Moon! There are ample scenarios that will justify a return on
investment that will be attractive for private or public/private investment. They simply have not been
addressed in either of these papers so far.
Adapted from: Wingo, D. (1995). Re: Article Number MP-2, in Should we return to the moon? A world wide
web public policy forum. Retrieved from http://www.ari.net/moon/HMAIL/MP2/0000.html
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Exercise 1
Before the class, read the APA blog entry on secondary sources
(http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/2010/05/secondary-sources-aka-how-to-cite-a-source-
you-found-in-another-source.html or search using the terms “using secondary sources apa
blog”) and answer these questions to discuss in class. Write your own ideas as well as
answers from the blog. Paraphrase information from the blog, don’t copy or quote it.
1. What is a secondary source?
2. Why should you find the original if you already have the information in another source?
3. When is it good to use a secondary source?
4. If you use a secondary source, which name do you put in your reference list?
Exercise 2
Four key steps to using quotations properly
Can you put these steps in the correct order?
a) Before you put a quotation into your essay, ask yourself why you are putting it in. Is it
special enough? Is it really relevant to your point? Would it be better to put it into your own
words?
b) When you have written the first draft of your essay, separate out each quotation with its
surrounding sentences. Read the quotation and its surrounding sentences slowly and
carefully. Have you introduced the quotation clearly? Does it clearly support your point?
Have you used the correct reporting verbs to introduce it?
c) Once you are sure that your quotation is worth putting in, check that you have quoted
accurately, that you have used quotation marks and an in-text reference, and that you have
used the correct grammar and punctuation before, during and after the quotation.
d) Being able to use quotations effectively starts from when you select and read with
questions in mind, critically evaluate, take meaningful notes and reflect on how you will use
your reading in your essay. If you follow this process, you should be able to make good
choices in what to quote.
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Exercise 3
Would you use these quotations?
Below are some quotations from student essays on bioscience topics. Read them and
identify any problems in using these quotations.
1. Kzanty (2004) states that “Organs such as the heart, liver, small bowel, pancreas and
lungs are used for transplants” (p. 11).
2. Logan (1999) states that “The second world war ended in 1945” (p. 11).
3. The main benefit of organ transplant is that it saves lives. As stated by Smith (2005),
“heart transplantation can save lives, but the procedure carries serious risks and
complications and a high mortality rate” (p. 12).
4. Improvements in transplantation have made it possible for animal organs to be used. This
is beneficial, as patients are not forced to wait for transplants. As stated by Kline (2005),
“advances in genetic techniques mean that there is less chance of animal organs being
rejected by the human immune system” (p. 53).
5. Transplantation carries the risk of being attacked by the immune system and the patient
is therefore at risk of organ failure. As stated by Smith (2005), “Everyone reported
common side effects which included diarrhoea, edemas, fatigue and ulcers” (p. 5).
Godfrey, J. (2009). How to use your reading in your essays. Basingstoke, England: Palgrave Macmillan. pp.23-
26.
121
Reporting Verbs
In academic writing, you will often need to refer to the research
of others, also called secondary sources. A reporting verb is a
word which is used to talk about or report on other people's
work. Reporting verbs can be used to great effect, but the
difficulty with using them is that there are many, and each of
them has a slightly different and often subtle meaning.
Introduction
In academic writing, it is important to present an argument logically and cohesively. You
may be required to:
 comment on someone’s work
 agree or disagree with someone else’s study
 evaluate someone’s ideas
Often you will be assessed on your ability to demonstrate these skills.
It is repetitive and boring to write ‘Smith says...’ over and over again. Fortunately, there is
a wide choice of reporting verbs in English. Reporting verbs can indicate either (a) the
author’s personal viewpoint, (b) your viewpoint regarding what the author says, and/or (c)
the author’s viewpoint regarding other literature.
To interpret the writer’s ideas accurately, however, you will need to use a verb with the
correct nuance (sense of meaning). Use an English learner's dictionary to check that you
have the right verb for the right context.
Function and strength of reporting verbs

Some verbs are weaker in their function, while others are strong. Some verbs are followed
by a preposition (e.g. as, to, for, with, of), while others are followed by a noun or ‘that’ (see
page 3). In addition, some verbs can fit more than one category e.g. warns can be used to
disagree with, emphasise or examine an idea.
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Common reporting verbs for academic writing
It is important you understand and know how to use the verb correctly before placing it in
a sentence, and that you use past or present tense as appropriate.
weaker position neutral position stronger position
addition adds
advice advises
accepts, acknowledges, agrees, applauds, congratulates,
agreement admits, concedes
concurs, confirms, recognises extols, praises, supports
alerts, argues, boasts,
argument contends, convinces,
assures, encourages,
and apologises emphasises, exhorts, forbids,
interprets, justifies, reasons
persuasion insists, proves, promises,
persuades, threatens, warns
believes, claims, declares,
guesses, hopes, expresses, feels, holds, knows, asserts, guarantees, insists,
believing
imagines maintains, professes, upholds
subscribes to, thinks
concludes, discovers, finds,
conclusion
infers, realises
accuses, attacks, complains,
contradicts, criticises, denies,
disagreement
challenges, debates, disagrees, discards, disclaims, discounts,
and doubts, questions
questions, requests, wonders dismisses, disputes,
questioning
disregards, negates, objects to,
opposes, refutes, rejects
discussion comments discusses, explores reasons
accentuates, emphasises,
emphasis highlights, stresses,
underscores, warns
analyses, appraises, assesses,
evaluation
compares considers, contrasts, blames, complains, ignores,
and
critiques, evaluates, examines, scrutinises, warns
examination
investigates, understands
articulates, clarifies, explains
explanation
comments, defines, describes,

estimates, forgets, identifies,
illustrates, implies, informs,
instructs, lists, mentions,
presentation confuses notes, observes, outlines, announces, promises
points out, presents, remarks,
reminds, reports, restates,
reveals, shows, states, studies,
tells, uses
advises, advocates,
alleges, intimates, hypothesises, posits,
suggestion asserts, recommends, urges
speculates postulates, proposes, suggests,
theorises
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Verbs followed by a preposition
defines x as y accuses x of y
warns x of y
alerts x to y
compares x to y
objects to x
confuses x with y
subscribes to x contrasts x with y
challenges x to do y apologises for x
disagrees with x
exhorts x to do y blames x for y
concurs with x
forbids x to do y criticises x for y
warns x to do y
Verbs followed by a noun or –ing form
analyses, applauds, appraises, assesses, attacks, considers, contradicts, critiques, debates, describes,
discards, disclaims, discounts, discusses, dismisses, disregards, evaluates, examines, explores, expresses,
extols, forbids, highlights, identifies, ignores, illustrates, investigates, justifies, lists, opposes, outlines, praises,
presents, questions, refutes, rejects, restates, scrutinises, studies, supports, underscores, uses,
validates, verifies
Verbs followed by ‘that’
accepts, acknowledges, adds, admits, advises, advocates, agrees, alerts, alleges, announces, argues,
articulates, asserts, assures, believes, boasts, claims, clarifies, comments, complains, concedes, concludes,
confirms, feels, finds, forgets, guarantees, guesses, hopes, hypothesises, imagines, implies, indicates, infers
informs, insists, justifies, knows, maintains, notes, observes, persuades, points out, posits, postulates,
promises, proposes, proves, questions, realises, reasons, reasons, recognises, recommends, remarks,
reminds, reports, reveals, shows, speculates, states, stresses, suggests, suspects, tells, theorises, thinks,
understands,
urges, warns
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Example sentences
Remember that the tense you use for your reporting verb will depend on your style guide.
Some styles prefer present tense while others prefer past tense.
Boynton (1982, p. 79) warns the reader that ordinary chocolate is ‘too frail to withstand
heat, moisture and proximity to baked beans’.
Hanks (2004, p. 257) defines an idiom as an expression whose ‘meaning . . . is distinct

from the sum of its parts’.
Smith (2005) disagrees with Fry (2003) when she maintains that many students have
trouble with reporting verbs.
Some people subscribe to the idea that chocolate is unhealthy, but Boynton’s (1982) book
refutes this claim.
This paper investigates the effects of alcohol on memory and stresses that further research
be done as a matter of urgency.
References
Boynton, S. (1982). Chocolate: The consuming passion. London: Methuen.
Hanks, P. (2004). The syntagmatics of metaphor and idiom. International Journal of

Lexicography, 17 (3), 245-274.
Useful resources
Websites
http://academicenglishcafe.com/ReportedandQuotedSpeechVerbs.aspx
http://tls.vu.edu.au/SLS/slu/ReadingWriting/Referencing/ReportingVerbs/ReportingVerbs.htm
http://www.edufind.com/english/grammar/rep7.cfm
http://www2.warwick.ac.uk/fac/soc/al/learning_english/leap/grammar/reportingverbs
Printables
http://www.awc.metu.edu.tr/handouts/Verbs_to_Introduce_Paraphrases_and_Quotations.pdf
http://www.latrobe.edu.au/lasesl/assets/downloads/verbs-message.pdf
http://www.latrobe.edu.au/learning/assets/downloads/Referencing-phrases.doc
http://www.york.ac.uk/k-roy/pdfs/Reporting%20Verbs%20functions.pdf
If you require more assistance with Reporting Verbs, please contact the Writing Centre on 8313 5771.
Visit the Writing Centre website for additional resources: www.adelaide.edu.au/writingcentre/
Principal Authors: Julia Miller & Donna Velliaris 2009. Revised 2010.
125
Read the following information on introductions and conclusions, then do Essay Writing
exercise 1 (Introductions) and exercise 2 (Conclusions) on the English for Uni website
before the class.
Once you have drafted your main body paragraphs and your conclusion, it is time to draft
your introduction. You cannot really introduce your essay until you know what’s in it, so it
makes sense to write the introduction last.
Here is a common introduction structure:
Introduction
Background statement – this sets the context for your essay
Issue(s) – where you outline the specific issues that are relevant to
your essay
Thesis – where you state your position in relation to the issues

Scope – where you outline what exactly is going to be covered in relation to your
argument
Thesis and scope are sometimes combined to form one or more sentences known as a
thesis statement. In that case, the introduction might follow a BIST structure rather than a
BITS structure. The thesis statement often comes at the end of the introduction, although it
can be written earlier. There is no set model for an essay, but this is a common way to do it.
There is more information about thesis statements at Massey University’s OWLL site:
http://owll.massey.ac.nz/assignment-types/essay-thesis-statement.php
The example above is one way in which the elements of an introduction are organized. For
example, sometimes an essay will begin with a direct quote, out of which the issue in
question emerges. The direct quote in such an instance would function as a ‘hook’ to draw
readers into the essay, therefore having a similar function to a background statement.
Sometimes, particularly in the case of a very short essay, the background statement will be
by-passed and the essay will begin with an issue.
Essays also sometimes begin with an issue, outline the scope and then move on to end the
introduction with the thesis statement.
It is important to remember that there is not a fixed ordering for the introduction, though the
BITS/BIST patterning is a very common one, which is why it is modelled for you as an
example.
126
127
Writing your conclusion
It might seem a little strange to think about writing your conclusion before you write the
body of your essay! However, thinking about your final message is an important point of
guidance for the rest of your essay. In addition, unless you know where you are going, you
can easily lose direction. So your conclusion, in the essay construction process, can
function as something like a map. Also, the conclusion is the last thing the reader actually
reads, so it needs to be memorable.
There are a number of questions you should ask yourself, such as:
 How will everything finish?
 What are you aiming for?
 What final impression do you want your readers to have?
This is how a conclusion normally functions:
Begin with a link to the preceding paragraph.

Restate your thesis and summarise your principal points.
End with a broad statement relating to the significance of
your argument.
The conclusion should not just repeat the ideas from the introduction. The introduction
includes the background to the essay, the important issues and a thesis statement. The
introduction leads your reader into the essay. The conclusion reminds your reader of the
main points made in your essay and leaves your reader with a final impression and ideas to
think about later.
128
129
Paragraph structure
Writing body paragraphs
At the heart of your essay lie your body paragraphs. A paragraph is a set of sentences
which are based around a single controlling idea.
Typically, a body paragraph will follow the format below.
Topic
sentence
Elaboration
and
examples
Concluding
sentence
Each paragraph should focus on one controlling idea only, found in the topic sentence. The
controlling idea can then be developed in a number of ways: elaboration or explanation;
evaluation; exemplification; or incorporation of research data.
Topic Paragraphs should be balanced – keep to the ‘no less than 3

sentence sentences per paragraph’ rule
Elaboration
and examples
Paragraphs should link together – use connecting words, both
within and between paragraphs, to keep a sense of cohesion
and linkage.
Concluding
sentence Paragraphs should have a concluding sentence.
130
Some more detailed explanation:
1) The Topic Sentence should unambiguously express the topic of the paragraph and be
linked with the overall thesis of the essay. The topic sentence can function as a sentence of
transition from the previous paragraph.
2) Elaboration of the main point should add more detailed information in relation to the
topic sentence.
3) Examples and Evidence in relation to your point should provide exemplification and
justification of the points made using paraphrases, summaries or direct quotations, all of
which need to be appropriately referenced.
It is very important not to do a ‘shopping list’ of quotations. You must provide linkages
through your own voice, which helps in the process of evaluation of external sources in
relation to the main point of the paragraph.
Examples and Evidence can be included in any of the sentences of your paragraph,
including the topic sentence, and can question the validity of the main point.
4) A Concluding Sentence should echo the main point of the paragraph and function as a
bridge to the next paragraph.
Remember to link all the points in your paragraph to the idea in the topic sentence. One way
to check if you have done this is to write keywords in the margin for each sentence. If your
keywords are related to the topic sentence, your paragraph is good. If there are ideas that
are not related, you should remove them.
In the following example, the unrelated ideas are highlighted with bold underlining:
Paragraph Sentence Keywords
It has been claimed that chocolate is a healthy food, but Topic sentence – sugar and
in fact it contains a lot of sugar, which can be unhealthy. health
For example, sugar can cause tooth decay, which can sugar and tooth decay
lead to dental problems in later life. Sugar makes (health)
chocolate sweet, so it is a necessary ingredient. Too sweet ingredient –
much sugar can also lead to obesity, which is a serious unrelated
health risk. There is currently an obesity epidemic in obesity (health)
many western countries. In addition, sugar contains a obesity in the West –
high amount of fructose, which is bad for the liver. The unrelated
amount of sugar contained in chocolate means,
fructose, liver (health)
therefore, that chocolate, particularly milk and white
chocolate, may not be healthy.
sugar and health
These unrelated ideas can be removed to make a more coherent paragraph:
It has been claimed that chocolate is a healthy food, but in fact it contains a lot of sugar,
which can be unhealthy. For example, sugar can cause tooth decay, which can lead to
dental problems in later life. Too much sugar can also lead to obesity, which is a serious
health risk. In addition, sugar contains a high amount of fructose, which is bad for the
131
liver. The amount of sugar contained in chocolate means, therefore, that chocolate,
particularly milk and white chocolate, may not be healthy.
You can then add examples and references to make your paragraph stronger.
Example paragraph
132
Paragraph writing exercises
The following extracts are adapted from Miller, J. (2014). Building academic literacy and
research skills by contributing to Wikipedia: A case study at an Australian university. Journal
of Academic Language and Learning, 8(2), A72-A86.
Paragraph Advice 1: Paragraphs need topic sentences.
Exercise 1
Can you add a topic sentence to this paragraph about using Wikipedia to teach
academic writing skills?
Despite this concern, Wikipedia has its own detailed style guidelines (Wikipedia, 2013)
which advise readers to write formally and clearly, and which provide many examples of
such style. Moreover, formal academic writing has an unexpressed rule that students be
‘experts’ in a discipline and write in a sophisticated style which reflects this mastery (Tardy,
2010). This means that far from writing in text-speak, with short forms such as ‘u r’ instead
of ‘you are’, students may actually be more motivated to learn good academic writing skills
in order to achieve the required level of formality to post a Wikipedia entry.
Paragraph Advice 2: Paragraphs should be logically ordered and cohesive.
Exercise 2
Can you put these sentences in the right order to make a logical paragraph?
(1) Overall, therefore, it is better not to refer to Wikipedia in an academic assignment.
(2) Although there is an editorial process by which a team of more experienced users can
veto a page, anyone is free to add, change or improve content where necessary.
(3) These educators question Wikipedia’s reliability as an academic source because there
are no restrictions on who may contribute, making the quality of the content variable.
(4) One area that provokes much debate among educators is the use of Wikipedia as an
academic reference.
(5) Some content is excellent, citing many academic sources (see, for example, the entry
for “dictionary”); other content, however, lacks references, and the advice “citation needed”
may appear in many places (see, for example, the entry for “Almaty”).
133
Paragraph Advice 3: Paragraphs should not be too wordy.
Exercise 3
Can you reduce the unnecessary material in this paragraph to make it more forceful?
One of many possible ways in which students can actively participate in Wikipedia as much
as they like and also at the same time help to develop their academic literacy skills is to try
to research a gap in knowledge that they have found on a Wikipedia page, and try to help
to fill that gap by writing and posting relevant, academically researched and referenced
material that they have written in a proper formal, academic style. Therefore teachers can
thus encourage students in this way to showcase their many academic writing talents of
different types and too their research skills for the scrutiny of not only their classmates, but
the whole of the worldwide web community out there. This can be both at once an
intellectually stimulating and mentally exciting and a daunting and scary prospect.
Paragraph Advice 4: Paragraphs should keep to one point.
Exercise 4
Can you identify the main points of this paragraph? Write points for each
sentence in the margin, and decide which points need to be removed to make
the paragraph cohesive. The opening topic sentence is your guide for what to
include in the rest of the paragraph.
(1) It became apparent to most of the students during the Wikipedia

assignment that accurate quoting and referencing of relevant,
trustworthy sources was necessary in order to provide support for
their information and enable other researchers to follow up on their
work. (2) In relation to previous literature, as in Tardy’s study (2010)
and Merrill’s paper (2002), some students in this class were excited
to feel they could contribute to a world-wide forum, thereby adding to
collective knowledge (Reilly, 2011). (3) It is also likely that students’
learning was enhanced because they could choose their Wikipedia
topic based on personal areas of interest, thus using their prior
knowledge to prompt their research, as Merrill advocates (2002). (4)
Writing for Wikipedia also meant that students had to synthesise a
large amount of relevant data to make it blend in coherently on their
chosen page; it was not sufficient to quote large chunks of
information out of context. (5) However, incorporating in-text
references appropriately and addressing all the details of referencing
(such as commas, capital letters and publishers’ details) remained a
challenge for many in the class.
134
Week 4
Editing and proofreading (online)
Punctuation websites
Dictionaries and other language resources
135
Your voice is what makes you distinctive as a writer. If you only quote from or paraphrase
other people, your reader will not know what you think. It is, of course, important to refer to
other literature, but you need to do so in such a way that your reader understands which are
your thoughts and which are those of other writers. Your voice comes across in the way in
which you comment on other people’s ideas and incorporate them into your own writing. If
you start every sentence with another writer’s name, for example, you are giving more weight
to another writer than to yourself.
a. Smith (2014) says that “chocolate is healthy”. Author prominent – quotation (direct
external voice)
b. Chocolate is good for general wellbeing (Smith, 2014). Idea prominent –
paraphrase (indirect external voice)
c. Recent research indicates that chocolate is not only good to eat; it is also good for
general wellbeing (Smith, 2014). Student voice prominent
You might be worrying about how you can include your ‘voice’ and yet still sound ‘academic’
when you are writing about a subject area in which you have little (or no) knowledge.
Including your voice does not mean that you should say ‘I think’ or ‘in my opinion’.
Here are some examples of the critical/analytical language that you can use as your own
internal voice when you present other people’s ideas:
Phrase How your voice is included

It has been argued (Smith & Jones, 2010) Pointing out what has been said by an
that… external source
As Smith and Jones (2010) note… Showing your agreement with the
external source
However, Smith and Jones (2010) fail to Showing that you recognise the
address… limitations of the study
Seemingly, Smith and Jones (2010) have… Showing you have tentative support for
the external source
On the other hand, Smith and Jones (2010) Showing that there is a contrast from
argue that… the previous argument
Smith and Jones (2010) assert that… Showing that the authors’ position is
strong but you are likely to have doubts
about it
It has been suggested that…(Smith & Jones, Showing that you recognise a number
2010; Brown & Culbertson, 2005; Lloyd & of authors have reached a similar
Giggs, 2004) conclusion, yet you might/might not
agree with it
One advantage of the work of Smith and Showing that you are positively
Jones (2010)… engaging with their work
Now look at one of the paragraphs from the chocolate essay. The internal voice of the writer
136
is in bold and the external voices are underlined.
Consumption of chocolate is something that many enjoy, and there is

evidence (Parker, Parker, & Brotchie, 2006) that high carbohydrate foods
such as chocolate do have a ‘feel good’ effect. Moreover, Scholey and
Owen (2013) in a systematic review of the literature in the field, point to
several studies, such as Macht and Dettmer (2006) and Macht and Mueller
(2007), which appear to confirm this effect. Yet, as Parker, Parker and
Brotchie (2006) note, the mood effects of chocolate are not long lasting. In
addition, mood is something that is difficult to isolate and quantify,
and aside from the study by Macht and Dettmer (2006) there appears to
be little research focus on any longer term mood affecting influences
of chocolate. Another point to consider is raised by Macht and Dettmer
(2006,) whose study found that positive responses to chocolate correlated
more with anticipation and temporary sensory pleasure, whereas guilt was
also a statistically significant factor for many, for whom the ‘feel-good’ effect
would be minimalised. As these authors stress, “temporal tracking of
[both] positive and negative emotions” (p.335) before and after consuming
chocolate in future studies could help in further understanding the ‘feel good’
effect and more negative emotions.
This is a balanced paragraph. The writer sets the scene at the beginning of the topic
sentence. The writer also links all the sentences together, using their own voice to lead into
content which is provided by the external voices.
Look at the same paragraph re-written, with the amount of the writer’s voice substantially
reduced:
Parker, Parker and Brotchie (2006) note that high carbohydrate foods such as
chocolate do have a ‘feel good’ effect. Scholey and Owen (2013) point to
several studies, such as Macht and Dettmer (2006) and Macht and Mueller
(2007) to confirm this effect. Parker, Parker and Brotchie (2006) note that the
mood effects of chocolate are not long-lasting. Mood is something that is
difficult to isolate and quantify, and aside from the study by Macht and
Dettmer (2006) there appears to be little research focus on any longer term
mood affecting influences of chocolate. Macht and Dettmer (2006) found
that positive responses to chocolate correlated more with anticipation and
temporary sensory pleasure, whereas guilt was also a statistically significant
factor for many, for whom the ‘feel-good’ effect would be minimalised.
“Temporal tracking of [both] positive and negative emotions” before and after
consuming chocolate in future studies could help in further understanding the
‘feel good’ effect and more negative emotions (Macht & Dettmer, 2006, p. 335).
Here the writer is not ‘in charge’ of the paragraph and it reads a little like a list of other writers’
ideas. That is something your lecturers do not want to see.
When you are drafting your paragraphs, use a colour-coding system to help you ensure your
academic voice is clear.
137
There are more details on voice in the Essay Writing section of the English for Uni website.
The uefap writing website (http://www.uefap.com/writing/writfram.htm) also gives more

detail on the issue of voice in writing.
When you get more confident in using external sources, you will gradually expand the
language of your critical internal voice. The Phrasebank website
(http://www.phrasebank.manchester.ac.uk/critical.htm) at Manchester University provides
examples of some more expressions to use when assessing external sources.
Exercise 1
Text 1 below is based on a variety of sources, given above the text. Look at the sources
and then identify the different voices in the text.
 Use yellow/orange or brackets ( ) for the student writer

 Use grey or straight underlining for paraphrases (indirect external voice)
 Use green or wavy underlining for quotations (direct external voice)
Sources:
“Cocoa and chocolate foods produced by appropriate methods can contribute significant
amounts of heart-healthy flavanols to the diet. These flavanols may enhance cardiovascular
health by delaying blood clotting, improving vascular endothelial function, and helping to
moderate inflammation.” (Hannum, Schmitz & Keen 2002, p. 103)
“In fact, evidence is accumulating that some forms of chocolate may have the potential to
contribute to cardiovascular health. Researchers began to investigate this possibility when
they realized that raw cocoa often has an exceptionally high flavonoid content.” (Hannum,
Schmitz & Keen 2002, p. 103)
“Flavonoids in general have antioxidant activity, which may explain in part why their intake
is associated with a decreased risk for cardiovascular disease.” (Hannum, Schmitz & Keen
2002, p. 103)
“Cocoa and chocolate are foods produced from cacao beans. The flavonoid profile in raw
cacao beans varies for different cultivars and can be quite diverse, but the most abundant
flavonoids are the flavanols.” (Hannum, Schmitz & Keen 2002, p. 103)
“The composition of chocolate is approximately 30% fat, 6% protein, 61% carbohydrate, and
3% moisture and minerals.” (Hannum, Schmitz & Keen 2002, p. 107)
“For those who want the potential health benefits of cocoa flavanols without the calories
from fat, cocoa is a possible option, because cocoa is essentially chocolate without the fat.
However, please note that most commercially available cocoas are produced using an alkali
(“Dutch”) process, which destroys a high percentage of the flavanols.” (Hannum, Schmitz
& Keen 2002, p. 107)
“Another group of compounds present in chocolate are the alkaloid methylxanthines, most
prominently caffeine and theobromine, both of which are stimulants and, in the case of
caffeine, often cause noticeable behavioural effects” (Bruinsma & Taren 1999, p. 1252)
138
“Some persons may use chocolate as a form of self-medication to compensate for
insufficient food intake or specific nutrient deficiencies.” (Bruinsma & Taren 1999, p. 1253)
Text 1
Many people may eat chocolate when they are hungry, or even lacking in certain nutrients
(Bruinsma & Taren 1999, p. 1253). Chocolate contains stimulants, including caffeine
(Bruinsma & Taren 1999, p. 1252), but chocolate may also be good for the heart, as it “can
contribute significant amounts of heart-healthy flavanols to the diet” (Hannum, Schmitz &
Keen 2002, p. 103). It is important to bear in mind that “the composition of chocolate is
approximately 30% fat” (Hannum, Schmitz & Keen 2002, p. 107). However, those who are
concerned about fat levels can use cocoa in another form, as raw cocoa does not contain
fat but is high in flavanols (Hannum, Schmitz & Keen 2002, p. 107). Nevertheless, flavanols
are often destroyed during processing (Hannum, Schmitz & Keen 2002, p. 107), so the
health-giving effects of chocolate are not automatic.
Now rewrite Text 1 to make the student writer’s voice stronger.
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139
Exercise 2
Which parts of these paragraphs below show you the student writer’s voice and which
parts show you the indirect external voice (paraphrases) or direct external voice (quotations)
of other authors? N.B. You can do this exercise online if you prefer:
http://www.adelaide.edu.au/english-for-uni/essay-writing/exercise-3/ or
 Use yellow/orange or brackets ( ) for the student writer
Another possible positive influence of chocolate is upon cardiovascular health. Chocolate,

processed accordingly, can be a provider of significant quantities of heart-friendly flavanols
(Hannum, Schmitz, & Keen, 2002) which help in delaying blood clotting and reducing
inflammation (Schramm et al., 2001). Such attributes of flavanols in chocolate need to be
considered in the context of chocolate’s other components – approximately 30% fat, 61%
carbohydrate, 6% protein and 3% liquid and minerals (Hannum, Schmitz, & Keen, 2002).
The key to maximising the benefits of flavanols in chocolate appears to lie in the level of fats
present. Cocoa, which is simply chocolate minus the fat, is the most obvious candidate for
maximising heart health, but as Hannum, Schmitz and Keen (2002, p. 107) note, most cocoa
products are made through an alkali process “which destroys a high percentage of the
flavanols”. Optimal maximisation of the flavanols involves such compounds being present
in cocoa and chocolate products at levels where they are biologically active (Ariefdjohan &
Savaiano, 2005).
The biological makeup of chocolate is also relevant in determining whether chocolate is

better viewed as a food or a drug, but the boundaries between indulgence and addictive
behaviour are unclear. Chocolate contains some biologically active elements including
methylxanthines, and cannabinoid-like unsaturated fatty acids (Bruinsma & Taren, 1999)
which, as Bruinsma and Taren say (1999), could represent a neurochemical dependency
potential for chocolate, yet are present in exceedingly small amounts. Interestingly, and
linked to chocolate and mood, Macdiarmid and Hetherington (1995) claim their study found
that “self-determined ‘chocolate addicts’” reported a negative correlation between chocolate
consumption and mood. This is perhaps indicative of addictive or compulsive type
behaviour. However, as Bruinsma and Taren (1999) note, eating chocolate can represent a
sensory reward based, luxurious indulgence, based around texture, aroma and flavour
anticipation, rather than a neurochemically induced craving. Yet, it has been argued that
chocolate is sometimes used as a form of self-medication, particularly in relation to
magnesium deficiency. A study by Pennington (2000 in Steinberg, Bearden, & Keen 2003)
noted that women do not generally meet US guidelines for trace elements, including
magnesium. This correlates with earlier studies by Abraham and Lubran (1981), who found
a high correlation between magnesium deficiency and nervous tension in women. Thus,
tension-related chocolate cravings could be a biological entity fuelled by magnesium
deficiency. Overall, however, it would appear that the proportion of people using chocolate
as a drug rather than a food based sensory indulgence is small, though further research
might prove enlightening.
140
Practice – your own voice
Take two paragraphs from your draft essay and underline or colour code the sentences.
 Use yellow/orange or brackets ( ) for yourself

How much of the writing indicates your own voice? How could you refocus your writing to
give yourself more authority as an author?
“A coherent argument . . . is clear, and each part of it has been carefully considered.”
Cohesive means “united and working together effectively”.
(http://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/learner-english/)
How cohesion is achieved
• Set up the reader’s expectations.

• Meet those expectations immediately by grouping information under relevant
headings and subheadings.
• Lead the reader through the argument in a logical, persuasive and structured manner.
Cohesion is found at three levels:
• Document level – headings; structure

• Paragraph level – topic sentence; structure
• Sentence level
Sentence level
• Move from general information to specific details.
• Place old information before new in sentences to promote logical flow in a document.
• Old information is anything the reader already knows.
• Make a link to the preceding text within the first 7-9 words of a sentence.
How to achieve cohesion

Grammar: This thesis was intellectually challenging because it really made me think
hard!
Vocabulary: This thesis was intellectually challenging because it really made me
think hard!
Conjunctions: This thesis was intellectually challenging because it really made me think
hard!
Parallelism: This thesis was intellectually challenging, cognitively stimulating and
visually appealing.
141
What cohesive devices can you find in the following paragraph?
As new technology becomes increasingly available to students inside and outside the
classroom, there is an opportunity for teachers to adopt more innovative methods of
instruction using online resources. However, although there is often an expectation that
students will be technically proficient with the Internet and computers generally (Galguera &
Nicholson, 2010), this proficiency may not always be the case (Keengwe, 2007). In fact,
even when students are proficient users of the Internet for social or other purposes, there is
still a problem for many students in contributing through online discussion boards (Hew,
Cheung, & Ng, 2010) and conducting research using the Internet (Head, 2007).
Understanding and establishing source credibility is one of the particular difficulties students
face (McClure & Clink, 2009), and many, even at university level, are overwhelmed by the
plethora of information and are unable to distinguish between peer reviewed academic texts
and other sources such as Wikipedia.
Coherence and cohesion in your own work
Look at your draft essay. Consider:
• Document level – headings; structure

• Paragraph level – topic sentence; structure
• Sentence level
Underline words that show coherence and cohesion. Do the ideas flow? Do you need more
linking words inside or between paragraphs?
Editing and proofreading

There are many online resources on editing and proofreading.
e.g. https://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/561/2/
https://www.adelaide.edu.au/writingcentre/learning_guides/learningGuide_editingYou
rOwnWork.pdf
One group in your class will do an oral presentation and workshop on proofreading in the
final week of the course, so you will have more practice then.
Punctuation
There is an excellent punctuation guide here: https://www.thepunctuationguide.com/
This is another great guide: http://www.sussex.ac.uk/informatics/punctuation/
This is a musical punctuation video which was a joint collaboration between Academic
English staff and students:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NzvIG8QXJiA&feature=youtu.be
142
Dictionary and concordancing websites
The following sites are useful for both native and non-native speakers of English.
Dictionaries
Cambridge advanced learner’s dictionary

http://dictionary.cambridge.org/
Collins Cobuild advanced dictionary

http://www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english-cobuild-learners
Longman dictionary of contemporary English

http://www.ldoceonline.com/
Macmillan English dictionary for advanced learners

http://www.macmillandictionary.com/
Oxford advanced learner’s dictionary

http://www.oxfordlearnersdictionaries.com/
If you are working through the University website, you can also use the Oxford English
Dictionary online free of charge:
http://www.oed.com/
And you can use the Macquarie Dictionary (which is Australian) if you search for it in the
Library catalogue and follow the links.
Concordancers
Concordancers allow you to enter a word and see its context in different texts. A
collection of texts is called a corpus (plural corpora).
AdTAT. Good for specialized subject vocabulary. You can build your own collection of texts
and examine it through AdTAT. Download to Desktop or USB, or you may have trouble
finding it once it is installed.
http://www.adelaide.edu.au/graduatecentre/red/adtat/
is an online concordancer which has a number of useful features and has a very large
database.
https://skell.sketchengine.co.uk
Just the word

www.just-the-word.com
Lextutor. Good for grammar practice

http://www.lextutor.ca/corpus_grammar/
Linguee. Lots of examples in different languages

https://www.linguee.com/
143
Monoconc English. Good for general vocabulary, but not always available
http://ec-concord.ied.edu.hk/paraconc/monoconcE.htm
Wordle. Builds word pictures

http://www.wordle.net/
144

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SCHOOL OF EDUCATION

EDUC 1016 and EDUC 2003

Objectives of the course

Course learning outcomes

Presentation and workshop

Graduate attribute Course component

The essays assigned in this course give the

These abilities underpin all the activities

These skills are particularly important in the

Awareness of these issues will be

These abilities are required in many of the

Assessment Task Task Type Due Date Weight Learning

Up to 5% is also awarded for participation in seminars/tutorials.

The quizzes do not allow late submissions.

Academic English 1 students – 700-1000 words total, including at least 3 references

Academic English 2 students – 800-1200 words total, including at least 5 references

IAP students – 700-1000 words total, including at least 3 references

Academic English 1 students – 1500 words total, including at least 4 references

Academic English 2 students – 2000 words total, including at least 6 references

IAP students – 1500 words total, including at least 4 references

(9-10 marks) (5-8 marks) (0-4 marks) /10

(7-8 marks) (4-6 marks) (0-3 marks) /8

(7-8 marks) (4-6 marks) (0-3 marks) /8

COMMENT MARK COMMENT

Keeping track of reference details

Commas and full stops

Writing complete sentences

Essay topics and group presentations

1. Predict the content of your material, based on the title.

2. Skim the material to get a general idea of what it’s about

4. Analyse the material. What does it talk about? Is it useful?

5. Note words where necessary. Jot down important points. These

Scanning is looking through a text quickly to retrieve specific information.

Analytical reading is reading a text several times in detail in order to understand it

Establishing an initial point of view in relation to your research topic

Developing your point of view as you read

(Huang, K. (1999). The Three Gorges Dam project: A question of sustainable

Statement of your argument, aim or point of view:

7. This was his raison d’être reason for existence.

(sentences 5 and 6 from http://facts-about-chocolate.com/types-of-chocolate/)

Making notes from lectures

Before the lecture

During the lecture

After the lecture

Making notes from your readings

Example of note taking

Example of original text

Example of written notes

Communication course – critical thinking

Example of a concept map

Other useful resources

Adapted from ALL Learning Guide - Making Notes.

Author’s family name and

Chapter or article title

Volume and number (for

Location of item (e.g. uni

Date viewed online

Your comments and

Adapted from UniSA (2007) Source:

An essay is a highly structured piece of writing which follows a typical pattern:

The parts of an essay

The idea can then be developed in a number of ways, such as through

Your paragraphs should be balanced – keep to the rule of no less than 3