Carolina Forcada

1963k

EXCERCISE 1- DICOTOMY OF CONTROL

As I see it this exercise has two purposes: Helping to better understand the reality and

categorize it with a practical criteria, and helping you to understand how your mind

works, what will make it easier to lead it. I think this exercise can have a lot of positive

outcomes, as it consists on checking our own thoughts. Realizing which irrational ideas

we are cognitively supporting can help us to get rid of stereotypes, to deal with

emotions, to develop resilience, to empathize more with other people and ourselves…

For doing this exercise, you need to chose a time and space where you can feel

comfortable and no one will interrupt you. Then you have to chose one event that

happened to you during the they. It is better to choose an event that isn’t too emotional,

because it can make the exercise excessively difficult. When you already know which

event you want to analize, it will be the time to write about it, in order to remember all

the details. After that you will be able to complete a table with two columns: the things

that are under your control and the things that are not.

Epictetus suggested that value judgements, impulses, and what you wish to avoid or

obtain, are under our control. That is to say, internal things usually are under our

control, but it is always like that? And what about external factors?
 Personal experience:

I choose to do this exercise between 8th and 15th of May. It has been a hard time, due to

all the outcomes and consequences of coronavirus. This exercises have helped me to

accept things as they come. Due to all the problems I was seeing around me I was

experiencing some kind of general anxiety episode. In my head everything seemed to be

dangerous, and I felt I wasn’t able to confront many situations that, in other conditions,

wouldn’t have been a problem.

To illustrate this I have chosen the situation of going to the supermarket. It is true that it

hasn’t been much time since I got my driving licence, and I still get a bit nervous when I

have to drive. Still, when my mother asked me to do the shopping, I realized how my

level of anxiety was increasing abnormally quickly. That’s why I decided to do the

exercise about it:

Going to the supermarket. Feeling worried about coronavirus and driving my car after a
long time.

COMPLETE CONTROL INCOMPLETE CONTROL

Decide to go to the market Which mean of transport to use

How careful I will drive
Take precautions about coronavirus
Chose a time to go when I know there will
not be much people
My judgements about other people and
about the importance of the situation
How the other drivers will drive and how
good/bad I will be a driving
How the other people will behave about the
virus
How much people there will actually be
My physiological reactions
Doing this exercise I have realized that the things that are under our control cannot be

forbidden or taken from us.. But the things that are not under our control are ephemeral,

slaves to the whims of chance and the actions of others. Are alien to us.

I have noticed that, for this reason, when I clarified the things that are beyond my

control with the things that I can control I can focus my energy in a more efficient way,

getting better results after making this kind of reflections. However when I didn’t

practice this routine, my efforts tended to be much more disrupted and I used to become

much more frustrated and critical towards myself.

It is difficult to accept that most things that happens to us does not depend on us, that

we are somehow just passive subjects of our life. Still, accepting this is an essential step

to get the control, not of our life, but of ourselves. The world is a complex and

unpredictable place, and our minds have limited resources. We simplify reality to be

able to deal with it, but the rules we use to do it can lead us to mistakes or to non-

adaptive thoughts. For this reason, reevaluate our beliefs is so important.

Keeping with it, what we can control is the way in which we interpret reality. Realizing

this can be very developer, as it is extremely useful to get rid of the “traps” that our

mind sets to us, getting conscious about our strengths and our weaknesses.

For patients

I think this is useful for people that tend to have neurotic treats. Those people, who are

most of us, tend to worry a lot in advance, they have difficulties with managing

emotions, and feel overwhelmed often. In this case, dichotomy of control can be useful

to check our own thoughts, deal with feelings of guilty, frustration and emptiness and
reorganize our cognitive schemes (realizing their priorities, their irrational thoughts,

accepting fear and anxiety about the unknown…)

It would be especially useful for patients who suffer from anxiety, personality disorders,

low self-esteem… Specifically, those who have a lack of control in their life becose of

any condition or difficult situation.

As Epictetus said, ‘happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one

principle. Some things are within your control. And some things don’t.

EXERCISE 4- KEEP YOUR PEACE OF MIND IN MIND

This exercise consists on applying your psychological tools to take action. I think this

exercise is a good way to get rid of one defense mechanism that can be very damaging

because it goes unnoticed and it can take people away from everything that matters to

them: avoidance.

Managing anxiety, frustration, stress, or anger can be very demanding, even exhausting.

That is why our brain tend to give is reasons to avoid situations that provoke this kind of

feelings, as it thinks it is the best to us. But we all know that dealing with this type of

situation is essential to get some long-term achievements or benefits. When this

happens, we need to stop our impulses, and make our brain understand that it is wrong,

and sometimes, confronting difficult and unpleasant situations is not only necessary, but

also good. In other words, this is an exercise of acceptance, Epictetus said “harmony

with the universe” to get truly what we intend. This is, more or less the aim of this

practice. First, you have to visualize a task that is sometimes frustrating for you, the you
have to tell yourself that you want to do this task, but you also want to stay calmed. And

finally, you have to imagine yourself performing calmly in this activity.

My experience

Stoics were really into emphasizing the harmony between reality and change. I think

this is smart, interesting, and difficult, as acceptance and change may appear

contradictory. As I see it, dichotomy of control helps to understand that this concepts

are not contradictory at all, and this exercise of acceptance and action helps to deal with

those feelings of impotence that may come with it.

The result of my experience has been very satisfactory. For me, it has been a good

choice to do this exercise and dichotomy of control together. With the dichotomy of

control, I organized my thoughts, realizing what is my responsibility and what is not,

what could I do to minimize my worries etc. And then, I could visualize my self-

performing good in a realistic way, because I already knew that some things that are not

under my control could be present in the situation. This was helpful to help me believe

in myself, to make me understand that I can deal with environmental difficulties. Made

me realize that I can perform pretty well even if the circumstances are not the best.

It is really interesting how this feeling of encouragement that comes of the imagery

exercise, helps you while actually performing this task in reality. It makes you feel

prepared for whatever comes, and this is extremely helpful to maintain calm. At the

same time, staying calm helps you to better perform, as you will be less impulsive and

your mind will think more clearly.

I think this exercise is about using the social psychology principle of “self-fulfilling

prophecy” or Pygmalion effect to our benefit. It scientifically based that when we think
something will happen, we tend to make it happen unconsciously. In this way, if we

visualize ourselves performing well, we will do what it takes to perform well when the

situation arrives.

For patients

I belief that this exercise in psychotherapy is a very good option. It is an easy and

pleasurable task that can have a lot of benefits. Specially for those patients that are

impulsive, tend to be avoidant and very self-demanding. This exercise will make them

feel empowered and encourage and, what is more, they will have a clear idea of how

they want to behave, making it easier to adapt to unexpected circumstances. Also while

doing this exercise they may realize of other things they need in order to perform well.

It can be whatever, some psychological need they need to work on, some tools needed

to perform the task… In this way they will be able to come before the situation. They

will be more conscious about it and, as a consequence they will be more ready.