PRACTICAL INSTRUCTIONS For PRIVATE THEATRICALS By W. D. EMERSON. Author of “AiCountry Romance,”’ “The Unknown Rival.” “Hum. ble Pie,” etc, Price, 25 cents, Here is a practical handbook, describing in detail all the ace vessorles, properties, scenes and apparatus necessary for an-amas teur production... Inaddition to the descriptions in words, ever thing is clearly chown in the numerous. pictures, more than ones hundred being insorted in the book. No such useful book has over been offered to the amateur players of any country. CONTENTS. Chapter IL. Introductory Remarks. Chapter II. Stage, How to Make, etc. in drawing-rooms or parlors, with sliding or hinged doors. In a single large room, The Curtain; how to attach it, and raise it, ete. Chapter IIL, Arrangement of Scenery. How to hang its Drapery, tormentors, wings, borders, drops. Chapter IV. Box Scenes. Center door picees, plain wings, door wings, return pieces, ete Chapter V. How to Light the Stage, Oil, gas and electric Nights, Footlights, Sidelights, Reflectors. How to darken the stage, ete, Chapter VI. Stage Effests. Wind, Rain, Thunder, Break- {ug Glass, Falling Buildings, now, Water, Waves, Cascades, Passing Trains, Lightning, Chimes, Sound of Horses? Hoofs, Shota, Chapter VIL. Scene Painting. Chapter VIII. A Word to the Property Man, Chapter IX. To the Stage Manager, Chapter X. The Busincas Manager, Address Orders to THE DRAMATIC PUBLISHING COMPANY, CHICAGo, ALICE IN WONDERLAND A PLAY FOR CHILDREN IN THREE ACTS DRAMATIZED BY Mrs. BURTON HARRISON WITH TABLEAUX SONGS aND DANCES {LLUSTRATIONS BY JOHN TENNIEL Curcaco anp New YoRE ‘THE DRAMATIC PUBLISHING COMPANY.CODYIIgH, Bua, Bu KH. Russett & Soa, ia rights reserved, CHARACTERS. ALICE, ‘THE WHITE RABBIT. ‘Nig QUEEN OF BEARTS THE MARCH HARE THE DUCHESS. ‘THE KING OF HEARTS. ‘THE COOK. ‘THE KNAVE OF HEARTS, FOUR FAIRIBS. ‘THE EXECUTIONER, SIX LADIES OF THE COURT, THE GRYPHON. DORMOUSE. THE MOCK TURTLE. ‘TRE CHESHIRE CAT. SIX GENTLEMEN OF COURT: THE HATTER. GUARDS, PAGES. COSTUMES. After Tenniel’s illustrations in The Adventures of Alice im Wonderland. OVERTURE. From Mendelssohn's Midsummer-Night’s Dream.TO THE AUTHOR OF ALICE IN WONDERLAND. + NCE upon a time, some kind ladies who had in charge a nur- sory full of ailing children, sent from poor homes to be cured of many ills, asked her who has here put your be- loved dream-story into acting shape, for something that amateurs might play for the benefit of their hospital. - What follows is th> result, Itis offered to you, sir, with the hope that such harm a ‘may have come to your immortal Alice, through alien n Alice, through alien handling, may be pardoned “in the cause.” 4 New York, December, 182 ALICE IN WONDERLAND. AcT 1. A Wood in Wonderland. TABLE Ausce asleep. Chorus and dance of fairies. [Chorus of fairia by Savrce CraKxe) Sleep, maiden, sleep, as we civele aronnd thee, $Mhed by the masie of bird and of bee Safe 16 ung foros since futies have foand thee ers wlven we tame to Koop tryet by the tree Steep, Alico leap? these ate mazical nombers, Seen Ut we tearne. trom the mount aud the stream; nr Re the task to keep watch over thy siambers. Wake, Alice, wake to the Wonderland’ dream. [They white their wands over sleeping child, Hreunt fairies. Autor: (as if arising from a fall). Good gracious me,1 thought Twas going to keep on falling for a week! After this T shall think nothing of tumbling downstairs. Why, T don’s believ Ya mention fe at home iC fell off the houso-top now. | Tt all be- gan by chasing after that fanny little rabbit. A white rabbit fhe was, with pink eyes; and as ho ran by mo I saw him take a watch out of lis waisteost pocket. Perhaps you don't. be Tieve ine. I'm not sare that I believe myself. But ho did; saw lim, He said, “Ob, dear, Tl be too latef” Of course there ‘as nothing forme to do but to ron after him, and when he popped into the rabbit hole under our hedge I popped too5 down I fell, and here Tain! Tvs a pretiy place. I wonder what latitude aud longitude T've got to. Mayho it is the other end of the earth—the an- an-tipathies, ‘That don't sound right. Ym glad there is no one listening. I'll have to ask somebody. Please, ma’om (drops courtesy), is this the—antigaa—antedilavian—an—ob, ive worse every time! Perhaps Pll seo it written up some- where, (Peers into cornere, and goes up eenire.) Not a single6 ALICE IN WONDERLAND. sign-bonrd. Not a soul to ask. When it comes to having no- body to answer questions, I'm in a dreadfully bad way. If somebody would only tell me a story I shouldn't feel so lone some. But of course there's nobody at the antipathios that Pu sequainted with. T believe Pil say the multiplication- table. Four times five is twelve, four times six is thirteen, four ‘times seven is—ob, dear, I shall never get to twenty! Til try geography. London is the capital of Paris, and Paris is the cap- ital of Rome—no, I don't believe it is. What's the matter with me? Anyhow, Pl say my little piece. [Takes attitude of child reciting. How doth the little crocodile Improve his shiniog tay ‘And pour the waters of the Nile ‘On'every golden seal. Ha! hat hat that’s funny! How cheerfully be ecems to grin, ‘How ‘neatly sorend his clase, And Welcome Hite fehes in ‘wih gently smiling fave. Ha! ha! bai [don’t mean to be, but P'm getting funnier, Enter Warre Raper, skurrying across stage, gloves and fan in hand, Warre Rannrr. Ob, the Queen, the Queen! Won't she be savage if Pve kept her waiting! Atice (ceclamation of delight). Ob, White Rabbit, White Rabbit! Bo stop aud speak to me. (Ware Rannrr jumps, drope gloece and fan, rune about stage like rabbit, Atice after ‘him. Ha dodges out, Axtce (lakes up fan and gloves, and fans herself). Who's the Queen, I wonder?” Is this ler fun? How grand J feel, fanning myself with a Queen's fan, to be sure! Enter Watre Rasarr, Jooking about on ground, Warre Ranpir. Oh, the Queen, the Queen! Ob, my dear paws! Oh, my fur and whiskers!’ She'll have me executed as sure as ferrets are ferrets, Auce (behind tree). I wou’t frighten the poor little thin again, (Throws gloves.) or : ALICE IN WONDERLAND. Here they aro, Mr. Rabbit. ‘Waure Ranprt (jumps, Ob, my whiskers! ” Whor- ever did they drop from? Now where's the fan “Axxce (pita hand outevith Yan), Herw it is, Mr. Rabbit Ware Rassrr (jumps). What a monstrous” hand! (Snatchos jan.) Vmsall over ina shiver, 101 ran home and tell Mary Ann about it Defore I go v0 Court. (Wit Wore Rano. assoe Coming oa), How ry fanny to be waiting on Teabbie! Lanppene my kit ten will ho senlng ine os errands next. ‘Then it" be, i Namvo;'T've ouly got to watch this monse holo till Dinah comes back, and take care that her mouse don't get away. Enter Ducurss, followed by Coos, rowing plates and itchen implements, COOK carries a larye pepper oruet in her hand. ms (0 COO}. Get out af thst yon imparient old hing, ox Yi cal Gout cer for eect [let Coon} (lo pote eee wun hese glo Ugur to eel fous Coats Sa 2 imo aa weg Bon avg a ons Dos?Wh th she te tro ameapan ie ain Yo Kein ae Pease Tt yon" bellove tte ho sneezed londer than before qronad von kato tens Unogong t cag to hi? ‘Atice. Oh, do, please: nines i ile Sug Dene hin shen he sheedes eS ee lin Chorus of SneezeeALICE IN WONDERLAND. n. Tepeak severely to my be Doeat hitn whet he enoe For he can thoroughly evoy “Tuo pepper woot he ploaces, Chorus af Sneczes Autcr. It is a very pretty song, bnt I don't exactly think Baby comld have liked it Well, what did ho do then? &. Hot Oh, he turned into a pig. Looking at Ducuuss pensively). If he had grown up, he might have made an ugly ehild—not that it matters, if he’s healthy, don't you see; and he must have made a very hand- some pig. Oh, I hope she's not offended. Ducunss (walking up and down). If everybody minded their own business, the world would go ronnd a deal faster than it does. UWatiss Arce around arm in arm, tilt Axsoe is dizey. Auice (breathiess), What work it would make with the daya ‘and nights! You seo, the earth takes twenty-four hours to turn upon its axis, Ducurss. Talking of axes—chop off his head! Atiok, Tho pig’s head? Ducess. His head, your head, overybody’s head! Just wait {ill you ace the Queen, that’s all." Ob, here's my eat! Enter Consume Cat. Cat. Good -morning, ladies. Fine day. I hope I seo you well, [Grins ALICE. Oh, Duchess, what a funny ent you've got! Dinah’s nothing to him. Pray why does he grin like that? Dooness. Because he's a Cheshire Cat, and the moral of that is, “Bo happy while you're young and beautiful.” Arice (aside). How fond sho is of finding inorals in every- thing! She doesn't look clever, but I suppose she is. Decuxss. Right, as usual, my dear, and the moral of that ia, you wonld seem to be or if you'd like it pus more sim ply, never imagine yourself not to be otherwise than what i¢ might appear to others that what yon were or might have beon WaB Not otherwise than what you had been would havo ap- peared to them to be otherwise, ALICE IN WONDERLAND. 7 Doct nth mor of tht iy Take sae of he ame an e ‘Auice, I wish you'd write it down. I can’t exactly under- ‘Ducuess. Oh, that’s nothing to what I might say, if I Meier cate ae elinbed up in tree). Dow's bother me Tm ejociess. Ties dveadfally disrespectful, isn’t he? but the pep- per ov tto his trnyar, ‘Deu't uiudy belleome allright agai, tebe mural tat Ca lotta aff cee) Le the eon ont waking with the S 1), Whe where? Let me rim home be- re. [Bait in eomfusion. "Thos fotshod her. Thoogh it would. stung pote), Ho looks gootchumored sow. Please ciate Boa cont yon tall ma which way L ought go from ter Gar. Tit depends upon where yon want to go fice, Ton care mc where. Gu on ft doem ater which way yong? Gin "Ont “aus ste to do thay if yon wall long enough. Tyamevay wloure yout “ALICE. What a frec-and-easy eat! I'm glad Divah isn’t hero to get disporaized, Tetchardly keomy sn. T-ased to Koo, brat orbit i the say Ted to kao ar. Haplain youreele : AAbten, Tenure becaose Di ot myst you see Gee tasteee Car Ibis é mutt to exp. Ho's the rudest thing T over sow. vont tay Tere awothor minute to be fread mo. (Turns fo@ Car. Come back, Pve something of the utmost importance Auice, What eit? Ga kenp your temper10 ALICE IN WONDERLAND, Antce (crying). You—you—you're another, and Yl tell m tmother on you. Sen if dow, Ue ier ‘at. Don’t get huffy. Tell me somo of the things you can’t cit? ry f the things you can’t re- Axicy, I tried “How doth the little busy bee,” and it catatlabout seria on es ume Can. Try “Yon are old, Father William.” Aurcx (repeats). “Yon are old, Father Wiliam,” the young man a anind Yat bt has base vet teste, 2 And yet yum inceeaniy sta ou Sot hed Bo'yon' thnks at ou ages Ie Agha “"ip my youth," Hatber William replied to his 20m, ‘But now that I'm perfectly sare 1 bave non oe eta a “You tre ld," aid the yonthas 1 mentioned before, van have grov ‘uncommonly fats eet at ou td buckesorersalt at the door— Ply what i he ronan of oat” “Tp may youth” ead the sage, a8 be ean ie ee ho i are, evuse of ths citineat one bling the box ‘Allow me to sell you # couple! See ALICE IN WONDERLAND. 1 “You are 014,” aald the youth, “and your Jaws nre too weak, For angthiog tougher than suet ‘Yet yon dnished the goose, with the bones and the beal— ‘Pray how did yon manage to do it?" Ia my youth,” anid his father, ‘1 took to the law, apart ah case wih iy wus ns fasted the reet offmy ite.” © x ‘You are old," anid the youth: “one woold hardly suppose ‘That your eve eas aa steady na ever! ee ‘yer'god belanced an eet on the end ¢f Four nose— ‘Whar made you eo awtally clever? ‘hat ciers Sasa gre yet ar ‘Do. you think I ean Masten all day to gach staf? ‘33 op! or Fl Kick you down Sais Car (applanda). That's every bit wrong. Atace (despairingly). Lknew it. Can, Then why didn’t yon say so? ‘Auice. I mean I know I didn't know it Car. That's worse nonsense than anything you're said yet, and that’s saying a good deal. ‘Autce. Oh dear, the ereature’s so unpleasant! TU ask him fone more question. Pleaao, will yon tell me what sort of people Tive in this country ? Ca (wares right pa). In that direction lives a Hattor. (Waves left pare) Tn that direction lives » March Hare. Both of them are mad. Ausce. I don't want to go there, then. I'm afraid of mad people. ‘Cat, You can't help yourself. We're all mad here, I'm mad. The Duchess is mad. You're mad. ‘Arter. 'm not. Gaz. You must be, or you wonldn't bo here. By-the-way, are ‘you going to danco in the Queen's quadrille to-day? ‘ALicE. No; but Fa love to, if Lonly were invited. Caz, You'll seo mo there. [Vanishes Atice. Where is het Well, I believe Lil call on tho March Hare. I've seen hatters before. As long as this is May, he mayn't be raving mad. Car (reappearing). By-the-way, what happened to the baby t Auice. It tarned into a pig. Can. I thought it would. (Vanishes,12 ALICE IN WONDERLAND. Attcr. He's gone again, Tm glad of it. He's:the’ mos civil eat Lover met. ee ee Car (reappears). Did yon aay pig or fig? ALtor. P-ig, pig! Eee Cat, All right. Don’t forget to keep your temper, [ Vanishes, leaving grin, Auice, Well, I've seen n cat without a grin before, i without a cat— Whav’s that? : ee [Banfare of trumpets. Enter procession of Oourt Enter procession of Court Gards: Kaxe and QueRN ov Hyanrs and train; Gardeners carrying spades; Soldicrs carrying clubs Couriers, diamonds; Court ladies, Aearts. “Wrote Rabat walking hack word, KNAavE OF Hearts carries King's crown on cushions Kix and QUEEN, Pages carrying train S (looking at Arce). Who is this? Kwave or Hzaurs. Plouso, your Majesty, shel es your Majesty, she's a strauger in ALICE IN WONDERLAND. 13 Qvesy: Taint! What's!your name, girl, and what business havo yon near my Court? Don't you know it’s a punishable of fence? ‘ALICE. My namo was Alice yesterday, please your Majesty, and I don't remember ow I cam 'QuEEN. Oh, you dowt remember? Well, nobody remembers here. If you had remembered, I should have bad your head cut ‘off upon the spot Enter Cnesumee Car. Gots Deind Axsce. Car (aside). Don’t be afraid of Yom, my dear; they're only @ paok of cards. "Auice (to Queen), You're tallking nonsenso, Quens (in a fury), Of with her bead! Axice. Off with your heads, you mean, Why, I eould cut the whole pack of you as quick as ent my supper. {Movement in Court. Bach gets behind the other in ‘aro. KiNG gets behind QUEEN. Kaa. Don't anger her, my love, She's s dangerous charac- ter. Ask lier to dance in your quadrille ‘Queex. Who said T wasn't going to, stupid t KiNG, Ask her first what's that she’s talking to. I don’t like the looks of it. [Can stares at Kina. (QuEEN. What is that singular object you have behind you, Alive ? Axtce. It’s a Cheshire Cat, your Majesty, a friend of mine. Allow me to introduce him. Kixe. Fa rather not, . Ho stares 80. ‘Anton. A cat may look at a king, I've always heard. Kine. In that case-he may kise my hand if bo likes Gar, Va rather note KING, He's too impertitient for anything. My dear (toQueEn), ‘will you kindly have this creature's hoad removed? ‘QUEEN (stamps). O with his head. [Guards and Exeentioner advance to seize Car. ‘Ho disappears, leaving grin, QuzEN (to Executionér). Off with his bead, I tell you, or you'll lose your own, Exxcutionsr (slowly, and scratching hia head), Well, your Majesty, you can't adzackly out a head off unless there's a body14 ALICE IN WONDERLAND. to cut it off of, It’s the first time I've been called upon to do such a thing afore—and at my timo o’ life I ain't a-goin’ to begin, [Throws down cae, Queen. Seize him, guards! (Guards carry of Executioner, QvzeN, Now if somebody don’t find that eat for me in Teas than no time, I'l have everybody's head off [Baount Court, in confusion, AU feel their necks, and put on mugjters, ete Auice. Perhaps the Duchess can produce her. He belongs to her. QueEN. The Duchess? Of course, Thi.t woman's always making mischief, ordered her to stay at home to-day, because ‘the last time I dined there, she put too much pepper in the soup. She'd do anything to spite me. White Rabbit! (Ware Rapin prostrater himself before her. QuxEN. Go to the Duchess’s and bring her here at once, (Ware Rappir dows and goes off. Warre Rapsrr (aside). Oh, my fur and whiskers! What an opportunity to serve the being I adore! Aurce (aide), He's in love with the Duchess, I couldn't think what made the poor little fellow so limp. (7 QuREN, Ifyour Majesty will take my advice you'll let the Cheshire Oat alone. He has the worst manners of any eat I ever knew. Enter Wurre Rassrt leading Ducuess. Watre Raparr. Bo strong, my love, be brave. Even iffshe con demns you to prison I will find a way to free you. Dociess, Yes, we will fly together, only save my head. Ware Rawatr, There is only one little thing. If we fy, I would like to suggest that you leave the Cook and the Cat and the Baby and the pepper cruct behind, Ducuess. Anything you like, only away from her. Sho eut ‘off my last husband’s head for sieezing in her presence, Ques (perceiving DucnEss). Ob, you're there, are you? ‘What have you got to say about that Cat? Dvcaess’ (cringing). He's an odd ereature, your Majesty. Quite original. Only a moment since he came running in to say that he had seen you looking as lovely as a dream, Quien (flattered). Not at all odd. A very clever cat. Hels pardoned, “Everybody's pardoned. Go, White Rabbit, and tell ALICE IN WONDERLAND. 15+ pact Saye ( Beit Werte Rast. dominions. Sere ee eee [Slaps him, Fun cap ineel “Gain ee don'y pomlehlaN We sme hers Ducuess and Wuire Rassrr. All dance around Axice, Oe one ee vanishes, leaving grin. ae ACT II. ‘Tue Map Tea Panty. Cottage with tree; long tea table set out Beneath it, Arm-chair at MancH Hare and Hatter sitting at one ond, with Doxmouss detrwcen them asleep, their eldcres on his back Enter atsor, Bowing politely. : Manom Hare and Harman (together). No room! No room! ALicE (indignantly, placing herself in a large chair). Tuere’s plenty of room! ‘ Mancn Hane (politely). Have some winet Axitce (looking up and down table). I don't see any wine. Manon Mare, Thanet sag i ane Atice (angrily). Then it wasn't very elyil in you to offer i Manca Hane is waow' very cel you to a down without ing invited. Silica, Tat know I was your tale. 10 aid for'a great, many more than three.ALICE IN WONDERLAND. Harter (12ho has been gazing curiously all this time at Auto our hair wants cuttings Cee ee (Aisoe (eserety). Yow should Tearn not to malo personal re marks, It’s very rode. . ae : Harun (daring) Why isa raven Vike a writing.deak? they've begun asking riddles. (Adoud,) I believe I can guess e, Do you mean you believe you can find ont the Mancit Hare (sharply), ‘Then you should say what yon moan, pAHOe Edo. At east—ae last, mean what Tay. That Haren (suddenly). Not the same thing a bit. Why, you might just as well say Teat what 1 see, Manon Hane (risky). You might just as well say that T like vl Tuo ip the samo as Tet what i ike joncouse (talking in sleep), You might just as well say that T vyoathe when T sleep i the same thing a bet on ? thing as I sleep when T Farrer (cujiag Doxmousn), It is tho same thing with you. at I see what I eat is the same thing as ALICE IN WONDERLAND, 17 ‘Auice (vo herself’). I must think over all I can remember abont ravens aud writing-desks—bnt it isn’t mnch, Harrer (who has taken his watch out, and looks at it uneasily, aking it and holding it to his ear). What day of the month is it ‘Auice (considering). The fourth. arrer (ith a deep sigh). Two days wrong! (Angrily to Maxon Hane.) I told you butter wouldu’t snit the works! ‘Mancu Hatte (meekly). Tt was the best butter, Harrer (grumbling). Yes, but some crumbs mast have got into the works as well. You shonidu’t have put it in with the ‘bread-kw Manca Iann (takes wateh, looks at it gloomily, dips it in his cup of tea, puts it to his ear, looks at it again, and repeats), Ie was the best batter, you know, Atice (oaking on curiously). Whab » fanny watch! Tt tells the day of the month, and doesn’t tell what oelock it ist Harren. Why should it? Does your watch ‘tell what year itist ‘Autor (readily). OF course not; but that’s because it stays the saine year for sich « long timo together, Tarren (concisely). Which is just the case with mine, ‘Alice (aside). Pim dreadfully puzaled. ‘The Hatters remark seems to me to have no sort of meaning, yet it’s certainly Eng- lish. (Alowd,) I don't quite understand y Harter. That Dormonse is asleep again, Let's pour a little hot tea on his nose. LAction. DonMovse (without opening eyes, shaking head: impatiently) Ofcourse, of course; just what I was going to remark myself. Tarren (abruptly to Aticx). Have you guessed that riddle yet! ‘Auice. I give it up. What's the answert Harrin. I haven't the slightest idea. Manou Hance. Nor I ‘Avice (wearily sighing). I think yon might do something Deiter with the time than waste it in asking riddles that have no answers. Harrnn, Ifyou knew Time #: well as Ido you wouldn't tall ting it. Is him ‘Auice. I don't know what you mean. Barren (eontemptucusly). Of course you don't, I dare say ‘you never even spoke to Time, ,18 ALICE IN WONDERLAND. Axton (cautiously). Perhaps not; but I know I have to beat time when Learn music. Harrex. Ob, that accounts for it. Ho won’t stand beating. Now, if you ouly kept on good terms with him, he'd do almost anything you liked with the clock. For iustanes, suppose it were nine o'clock in the morning, just time to begin lessons, You'd only have to whisper a hint to Time, and round goes the clock in a twinkling! Half past one, time for dinner! Marcu Hane (in loud whisper). Lonly wish it was! Auice (thoughtfully). That would bo gravd, certainly, but then—I shouldn't be hungry for it, you know. Harter. Not at first, perhaps, but you could keep it half-past ‘one as long as you liked. Azscx. Is that the way you manag Harver (mournfully). Not 1; we quarrelled last March just before he went mad, you know (pointing with teaspoon to Mancu Hane). It was ut the great concert given by the Queen of Hearts, and I had to sing: [ikises 00 sing. “Torino, twinkle, ttle bat, How yonder what you're at You knew the song, perhaps? Autce (doubtjully), T’ve heard something like it, oe eee gneey ; er ee once (AU in chorus.) ‘Harrer. Well, Ya hardly finished the first verse when the Queen bawled out, “Owith his head! He's murdering Time!” ALICE, How dreadfully savage! Harrent (mournfully wiping his eyes with his napkin). And ever since that, Time won't do» thing I ask! It’s always six elock now. Axice (eagerly), And that’s the reason so many tea-things are Put ont here? Harren (sighs dejectedly). Yeo, that’s it, Is always tose time, and we've no time to wash the things between whiles, ALicE. Then yon keep moving round, T suppose? Harn, Exaoily so, a0 the things get used up. ALICE IN WONDERLAND. 19 ‘Auice. But what happens when yon come back to the begin- ning? : f Mancu Hans (yawns), Suppose we change the subject. Pm goiting tired of thin. voto the young lady tells naa story. ‘Auice: (in alarm). Pm afraid I don't know one. Harter and MAKcH HARE (logether). ‘Then the Dormonse shall! Wake up, Dormouse. [They loth pinch it at once. Donnouse (slowly). Lwasn't asleep. heard every word you follows were saying. Mancu Hane, Tell us a story. Arice. Yes, please do. Harman, Aad be quick about it, or youll be asleep again be- forwite dane aay 0 ioe e MOUSE (eerie ie upon a time there were three Udte sister, wad Sher famaes were Eloi, Lace, aud Tile, ad they lived at the bottom of a well— Avice, What did they live on? Donaouse (ponders). They lived on molasses. Aicr (gently). They couldn't have done that, you know. They'd have Deon ill. ‘Doxaouse. So they were aly Atice (much puezled), But why did they live at the bottom of a well Manon Hane (to Autce). Take some more tea, do. Anion (offended). Thaven't had any yet, so I can't take Harrer. You mean you can’t take less, It's very ‘easy to take more than no- thing. ees ‘Anice. Nobody asked your opinion. a HArren (in triumph), Who's making personal remarks nowt Ausce (helps herself to tea and bread and butter). Dormonse, why did they live at the bottom of a well20 ALICE IN WONDERLAND. ALICE IN WONDERLAND. at Dormovsr ( ponders again). It was a molasses well. ‘That begins with an M: Atace (angrity). There's no such thing, such as monse-traps, and Barrer and Marci Hare. Sh! ’Sh! the moon, and memory, and (Gesticulations enjoining silence. muehness (more and more Dormovse (sulhily). If you can't be civil, you'd better finish , drowsy). You know you say the story for sour things are much of mnch- ‘Auice (Aumbly). No, please go on! I wou't interrupt you ness, (alle asleep, enoree, ERIMDE dees asia ier hemninasereall acs EY nd és aroused by « pinch.) Doxmovse (scornfully). Oue, indeed! And so, these three lit- : Did you ever see such a thing tle sisters—thoy wero learning’ to draw, you know— : ‘as a drawing of amuchness? ‘Aticz. What did they draw? ‘Auice (confused). Really, Donsouse. Molasses! a now. you ask me, T dou’t ‘Harrun (rises). Iwant a clean cup. Let's all move ono, : think— ‘ea P. place Harter. Then you should [He moves on from seat to seat all round. the table, not tall. The others follow him tilt they coma dack Auiex: (springs up. in dieprst), You're the radest old thing T again to seat beyond Warren's first’ place, ever sav, aud this is the stupidest tea party I ever was at in Doxmouss gels Harrer’s place, Mancu Hane all iny life! gets Dorsouse's, and Attce gets Manca Tuarren and Maren’ Hane. I’s all the Dormouse’s fault, Hlase's who has upset raile-jug into hia plate Larue hin io the teapot. _ Up with your heels, old fellow! Auice (when peace is restored). But, Dormouse, I didn't une [hay loist the Donsouse between thom, and re in derstand, Where did they draw the molasses from? the aot of putting him head. foremost in the tea- ‘Harter. Yon can draw water ont of u water well, so I should pot, ken. trumpet sounds. When they have think you could draw molasses out of a molasses voll. Hey, stood Dowaouse on his head in tea-pot, the HAT stupid? Z rex runs to wing and looks out ‘nereously. Altice (turns her back on him). But they were in the wel me (to fave you seen the Mock Turtle yet Donuouss, Of course they were well 12 a Harner (to Atrcn). Have ¥ N04 T don't know what be is [Harrer and Manon Hane slap their knees with ae Flatten, ts the thing mock-tartle soup is made of. Sean ome one ueliioaly HATIFN, over tastede-I moan Tever heard of ono; at this, Fiarrin, Here he comes, arm in arm with his friend the Doraouse, They were learning to draw (gets very sleepy), ‘Alice, Why with an M? 1 Well, Inever! gryphon ist ee i Manos Hane. Why not? a [They goon expressing surprise, il bases: is offended. Donsovss (half asleep—they pinch him to keep him awake) ‘Ausop. You might be more polite about it. Come, what is a rspliont Bit sa SrypLON og, Wail tll you've talled with him maybe then fowl say he is a grnft un See eT Groans from the Dormouse and the Harren. Atiow. I hope he’s no worse than the rest of you.22 ALICE IN WONDERLAND. Enter Guvrnox and Mocx Tortie arm in arm ; they exchange greetings with Manon Hare and Harter (Doumovse 1 asleep), and stare at Axxcx, neGRYPHON. Holloa? What's that new curiosity you've got ere Haren. Oh, she’s—well, I don’t know exactly; I don't be- lieve anybody imows. Queer, isn’t she? GnvPHon (derisively). If I had bait like that, P'— [Laugls. Tadignation of Autor. Mock Tuntrx. Introduce me to her, somebody. Atice (shaking hands with him). How sad he looks! sur be has a history Gxxenox, History! I believe you. Why, it would fill story-book. Here, steam ahead, Mock Turtle, and tell your his tory. Mock 'Tuserns. Til tell it to her. I'm Sit down, everybody, and ou'é speak a word till Thave finished. (They si Alice (after short eileaea). T dow see how he oan over hush ithe dov’t begin, Mock Tunnue (sighing deeply), Once I was a real turt (He sibs concutsively,; alt wipe their eyes. Silence, Aticx (getting up and eourtesying). Thauk you, sir, for your very interesting story. Mock Turis, It isn't done, I've only just begun. [Atice. sits down. Mock Turvi, When we were little we went to school in the sea. The Master was an old Tartle—we used to eall him Tor. toise, Aricr. Why did yon call him Tortoise if he wasn’t one? Mock Torti (angrily). We called him Tortoise because he tanght us, Really you are very dull. Guyrox. You ought to be ashamed of yourself for asking such a stupid question, Harter. Of conrse you ought. Maxc Hans, I wouldn't have believed it; would you, Dor- monae ? (Dormouse snore, Auice hangs her head. Grrenox (to Mock TonTtR). Drive on, old fellow. Don't be all day abont it! Mock Tuxrux, Yes, wo went to school in the sea, though you ALICE IN WONDERLAND. 23 att bllevo it Mice, T never said 1 didn't Mock Tortie. You did, Oe. Hold gone tong e Seer ponte (jroudly), Wo had the best of educations5 i Senne Mier tar oe fae ni ace bs no proud ax all that, ee Leen ti abl ; aor Tone (onziously), With otras? doce. Yen Hrenoh ant is Boce Tow, And tg? oes Catignantiy. Catal v9 oe Hose onan (Oreatiy elit), Ab, don youre wan't 2 Fee oMorat our thiy lind abe TINE mul ond eats ning duiee. Tdou't know what you wanted with washing, living a ruore TouTLE Caipng). T conan afford to Jearn it, anshow. 1 ook the regula conse only. otal Se or gunateHeclig avd Welthiog, of cones, We begun woe Ten eo diferent rschea of Atihintio—AMD Tutt ee rte Uglteation ai Darieoo, ‘Ruce. Usliicationt imepnons You let, spout oo URS To —make—any thing prettic Leen Maser, aha to gi le to-=_ O1com gt to be ahem mires Ofouie sure 0 ee te Mince I wo have bined 1, woud 300, Do sooner (hanging head), Well, what elso had outolearay ices ton ont ea cea oe se ecg Do aac cea i ae eet ating in Cal % aa a hat eounde exactly Miko eorething lt P heard, (Aloud.) How did you faint in coils! rites ieee ‘Mock Torrie. I oan’t show you myself. rant tne Gryphon nover learned it [Arter tries to speak. You know what to beautify is, I24 ALICE IN WONDERLAND. GuveuoN, Hadn’t time, Iwent to the Classtoal master, He was an old crab, he was, Mock ‘Turin. Lnever wout to him, He tought Langhing and Gries, they ased to say. GRYPHON. So he did, so he did, [Both weep. All weep as Defore Axscr. Ant how many hous a day did you do lexus? Mock Turrum Ten honrs the first day, nine the next, and tics, What a enrious plant pediRYRHON. That's why they called them lessons, ‘Cause thoy lessen from day to day. (He laughs gruply ; laugh gece round eirele, each touching the other to make him see it Maxon Hans. Joke, Dormouse, joke. Wake up and seo it! [Donmouse enores, Auice. Then the eleventh day must have boon a holiday, Mock Torre. Of course it wa Auice, id how did you mauage on the twelfth? Gurrnox (rising). Oh, dry np, will you? ‘That's enough about lessons. Let's talle about the games, Mock Turi (bursting into tears). Ob, eannot dear it. [ Chokes, [OnxpHon slapping him on back; movement around able. Haren, fetches teapot to pour on him, te. Grvenox. Somo as if he had a bone in his thront. Mock Tuxexe, "Tis the memory of my happy childhoods hours; Unt Pil resame. Per haps you never lived mach under’ water. Aut, Not much, Mock Turtrx. And pochaps You were never introduced to ‘a Lobster? ALics. I oneo. tasted—no, Tonee saw one, He was ly ing on a dish covered with bread crumbs and red pepper. Mock Tortex. What uso was that? ‘They wonld wash offin the sea. Well, you oan have no idea what fan it is to danco in a Lobster Quad- rills. ALICE IN WONDERLAND. Arsen, No; indeettt fe : Mock Toerre. First form in a Tine along the sea-shono, Gryno. No; first clear away the jelly-fsh. ox TREE. Advance twice— ivernow (intomep. Late oe soar partnr— Mock Tort:x, Advance twieo, balaves to partuere— GrvPHox. Lobstors chain: Mock Torri. Throw the— Gaveuox (lounding tn air). Lobsters— Mock Tuners, Far ont to se as yon can-— Gaevruox (rery ond), Swim afer Tem Moot ‘Pox (oqerng). ‘arn omersult i the wae RxPHON (ronrs). Change lobsters! eee See tonrin, Back to land again! (opping gudeaty— That's all of it wonldn’t you like to see us dance it ‘Axicr. Oh, that I would! Gavesion, Allright. Mock Tear.e. Whol sing? 4 ae Grypaox (Gru). Nowlig, Ue got ats eld. Bede Tau!’ remem en they sing andance to the following worda, alt “unshg inom, Will yor won't yo 2 ‘powe: “The Spider and the Fis.” s-Wvit you walle a te foen 2 GTM SPeIUES wore and te tries a Ty re i weit om come and Ba he flanked whine iid nat Join the dance, att emi to nl en he cae wo goths sly ena re swoat mater Te bow far wo gz?” hs say end rei See a ct he Ear ue he ae So tm Engin 8 fat othe ad ola the dance. FRSA oor pale loved snl Joi he dance wa gon, wg't soa, wl oe mont Jon wl Ton ote wee SAR 22M, oP Eee gous owe you, en’ yon Fol the d Harter. Brayvo! Maxcu Hane, Brayvo! Wako up, Dormonse, and applaud ! [Donouse applauds in sleep.26 ALICE IN WONDERLAND. AMO? (@ Mooi Toute). I know a song abont you—it's bean fa Cutonus. Do sing it! Autos (sings) * Bonatifal Star.” Waling n'a bor taeeg tes oe Who for each daintioe would not a Soup of i 800-090 af ihe erereniy Beast, Seana Loup ““Deautfal Soup! Who eare for ‘Game, or any other dish? oe Wo would not five Al sle fortwo D Sharworth only Of besuit Soup f Fennyworth only of benatfay Soap ‘oust Soo 7p! il 800-00 So-00p of ite ee onening Boautta beanti-FUL SOGP!” [A trumpet sounds off. AU start in alarm, Enter Watre Raworr and Guards. Warre Rapair, Sorry to intrude, Alico and gentlemen, but I have orders from the Queen to summon you all as witnonsoa to the great trial of the Knavo of Hearts’ case, about the stolen tarts. AuicE. But I never heard a word of it before. Wrire Ranprr, All the better. Just the thing th Close in, guards! [oe HarTeR. Will they do anything to me? Maxc Haut. And mot Dorwouse, And me? GrrEuON. Tain’t done nothing to nobody, have I? Mock eee: Tam the toy of destiny! Move on! hey Form into « procession, Harte carrying tea- cup and. piece of bread and butter. Guards Fall in. around them, ‘Tablean. ‘coRTAIN. ACT IIL Hall in Quexn’s Palace, Kise and QUEEN seated upon throne, Courtiers around them; KNave or Heants ia chains, Guard on either ide; Wurré Ransrt right of Kxo, scroll in one hand, trumpet in other; GRyvPHON, Manon Hane, Mock ‘Tontrx, Donuouse, Table with dish of tarts centre stage. Auice near GuxPron. Autor (40 Grxpuox—points to tarts). T sappose those are the refreshments. I wish they'd got the trial over and hand around the tarts. Gnyrvow. 'Sh!’Sh! : ‘Silence in the Court! Herald, where's the jury? Please, sour Majesty, we forgot to get auy. <¢. bonstrous! ‘Thor must be» juny. Provide the Gryphon and the Mock Turtle and the March Hare and the Dor- Serbs ith Mates ant pencils aod ot thom be the Jury [Rapprr bows, and seats the characters named upon ‘bench, with slates and pencils. They all fall to.writing on the spot. ee ‘Axtce (glancing over slate). They are writing down their owmtname, What fonng ind of Js! ‘Ranarr. Silence in the Court! ing at slates, reads). What fuony kind of seat eS : [She laughs out. . Silence in the Cour! Ee hee jumps. The Doxaousw’s pencil squeaks tipo has slate. She takes it from hin, and Ie goes on writing sith his fingers ; then Falla C i Herald, read the secvsation. ae Ramnie (lows three Basta on trumpet; then, unrolling parchment scroll, reads).ALICE IN WONDERLAND. “The Queen of Hearts; she made a emai to com hefore that verdict = wildly). Fourteenth of Mareh, Se SU a ape, Harman tee a piso out of om apills ten, etc. ms ae op talking for a’minute, won't you? (Zo Bring me a list of singers in the last Court concert, ALICE-IN WONDERLAND. 29 LOvrronn Bows and goes off. Returning with soroll. Harter trembles anit shakes his shoes off KING. Give your evidetice, or L'il exeonte you, whether you axe Tarren, I'm a poor tan, your Majesty—and T hadn't but just degnn my tea—not above a week of so—and whut, with the fend and bittter getting s0 thin, aud the twinkling of the tea ‘The cwinkling of what? Harren. It began with the tea. Kina, Of course twinkling begins with a T. You take me for adunce. Go on. Harren, I'm a poor mau—and most things tivinkled after shut.” Ouily the Mareti Har Manctt Hane, T didii't Harrex. You did. Maxcn Harn, You're Wurts Rasrr, Silence in the Conrtt Harren. After that I cut some more bread and batter, aud the'Dotniouse vaid— (Looks round anaiously.) [Donmouse snores. Kino. What did the Dormonse say? Harinx, That I can’t remember. Kina, Yon must remember, or PIL remember to have your head ent off Tarren (goings down on. knees). Vin & poor man, yor eaty. Kina. Yon'to a poor speaker Domioust (wating up and cheering). Hear! Heart Kixe. Suppress that Dormonse somebody. [orrreer or Count pops lug over DORMOUSE'S ead like extinguisher ‘Ausoe, V'm glad I’ve seen that done, your Majesty. T've often read in newspapers how when there was an attempt at applause Hewas immediately suppressed by the officers of the Court. KiNG. That’s irrelevant. Hatter, stand down. Harter. Tcan't, your Majesty ; Pm on the floor now. Kixa. Thon sit dow Mook Torte (cheers). Hurray ! Hurray! Kava. Sappress that jurymas, Lorvices oF CouRr puts bag on Moc TURTLE. ar Maj-30 ALICE IN WONDERLAND. Quen (who has deen reading long Uist on paper). Stop there, Hatter, Z thought so, You're a pretty fellow, aren't you? Whe murdered Timo when he sang at my last concert? Off with his head! Haren (on knees). Have meroy! have merey, your Majesty! Tt was the tea went to my head. QuEEN. Then I sentence you to never touch another drop of tea, Harrer. Worte aud worser. Boo-hoo! Boo-hoot ‘QvEEN, And to dance a hornpipe for the Court. Harren. I cau’t, your Majesty ; P've got « bone in my leg. axe. Obey! (Afwsic; dance, Tarren finally falls eohausted, ‘and. is picked ‘up, carried to ‘seat, and. eatin. greisher clapped on his head, Kino, Call the noxt witness, Waite Rassir, Next witness. Enter Coox, pepper-bea in Rand. Hoerybody falls to meesing, Kae (sneezing). Give your evidence, CooK. Sha'n’t, Kane. That sounds rather like sauce, Hum! my dear, sauce from a Cook; not bad, is it? Queen (snappishly). Sance for a gander! Kix. Hom! hum! Now what am I todo next? AuIcE. He's perfectly idiotic, Warre Rasutr, Try cross-cxamining her, your Majesty. Kina. Be very cross, you mean, All right. Answer ine, mln- ion, or your life shall pay the forfeit. What are tarts made off Cook (shaking cruet ; everybody sneezes). Pepper, mostly, Donmovse (bolding ‘up hand) T know, tether Ge mo: lassen QuzEN, Collar that Dormonse! Beheud that Dormouse! ‘Turn that Dormouse out of Court! Suppress him! Pinch bim! Off with his whiskera! [Dormouse is taden out of Court, Kana (eneezing violently). The witness may go, I have fally cross-examined her, and the testimony is taken down, CooK (iwaving pepper dea). Yon are a nico King, aren't yout I could make a better one out of a lump of dough Queen (sneering), Off with her head! [Coox is taken out of Court, ALICE IN WONDERLAND. 31 te (ewemsog)osly ry cone, ee age er the poxt witoesk” Temes ny fond he Wn: Rann, Next winess—Alic! Kiron, Hore ‘She upsets Jury, one falling upon another, also sev- Ue aa ea denice ae . Sect again, Ausce. Ob, 1 beg your pardon! Theyre exactly Ike ms ah, that I apie ian Wook : Sr rano (evarely}.. What do you know abost thia unfortmate affair t Auer, Nothing. Kino, Nothing whatever ditoe. Nothing whatoren Ting. Toate ery important. Walle 1¢ ou your alae, ry: Tyee nine (a, ire ee mportant, of course I meant—write it down any how. Consider your verdict. Gees Waurz Ravasr. Wait a minute, your Majesty, Here's a! of vrs pled up inthe Cours, Kino, Are they in the prisoners handwri ee Ware Ranpit, No, thoy’re not, ‘That's te queereat thing coe [Jury Look prueeled Kixa. He mnst have imitated somebody else's handwrit- - [Jury brighten up. jesty. If I may speak a Kxave oy Hants, Pleat, your Majeoty, If T may apeak word in my own defonce. I didn’t write it, and th i signed at the end. ea Na. ‘That only makes the matter worse, aa rmeatt some muekiet you'd havo siguod It, Uke ah [AU elap hurr re ald today, my | Thats the fab clover thing sou iy my ann proves tho ereavurge guile Catch we going dove it32 ALICE IN WONDERLAND. ‘tho kitchen to roll ont pastry, ona broiling day lake this, for him to steal, the villain! Until yon read the verses, how do yon know what they them, White Rabbit Watrre: Ravurn (pute on glasees), Whore shall 1 begin, your Majesty? G. Bozin at the beginning, aud go on till you reach: the eud—ilien stop. (Wurm Ranmir steps to centre with the air of a public porjoemer—cleare Ueroat, shrugs adjusts Gasees, ete. then reads as follows. While the teres re reading, the QUEEN'S gestures are imitated by her lailies, the Kune’s by his gentle- ‘Toy told me you bad boon to her, KiNG. Hold on, ‘That means me. I can't swim, What do yon mean by’ presuming: to give mo # good chara ter, you andacious seouns rel? Qurex. Off with his hoad! Wnrre Rann, Hee sent them word Thad. nét to be tre. Mid push the matter Kina. Youll push the matter on, my dear, Do you hear that ? Wurry Rapnry, What would become of you? [General soliottude for Qurex. ALICE IN WONDERTAND. Ie soa chan to be orn a Sea nd rete toyota et them fea, Spiny so ty werd ‘Kane. Pl let him freo, the rascal! ‘Wurre Razurr. notion, was thet "Nore eho had nro, Hum! What’s that? You never had fits, had you, my lovet : “gunes ( furiously—aime sceptre at Kise), Nevert KING (didging). Then the word don't AE yon. (Aagrily:) That's # pont ‘Warne Raserr (continues). [AU Laugh conoulsively. iar eat se a aoa ace [Mystery to audience,ALICE IN WONDERLAND. op Jt now sh tked them bast ‘A geet kept from all the rent ‘elwoem oersclves and nee Queen, I kmew there was a woman in the ono, Sho liked thet best, did she? Who is she, Id like to kuow? ‘The Dnch- ess, FL be bound! Order tho Duchess to como here immedi ately. [iteit Guards, returning with Docuess. At sight of her, Wnere Ranbir starts, clasps his hands, and when ale Falls on her knees, cems about t0 interrupt, QueEN, Don’t try to defend yourself, Your guilt is fully on- tablished So that creature stole my tarts for you to eat, did he? Knave or Heants (sarcastically), If I went to stealing, Yd do it for a difforont-looking gal. Docness (in tears). Pm a lone widow, your Majesty, and my only child was yesterday turned into pig, and the Cook has given warning. QUEEN, Circumstances alter oases, I will admit. And if the Knave of Heacts will marry you, Pll sot you both free. Other- wiso—off with your heads! Kwave or Hearts. Marry her? Not ifI know myself? Ta rather bo executed, fis all the samo to you, So come along, old Indy. ‘Warrs Rannir (stribing attitude). Hold! [@enerat attention. Kixa. Why, what does this mean? ‘Wire Rawpir, Now that I know the sontenee, I cannot tell allio; Iam the culprit. Istolo the tarts, I wrote the verees, and I will wed the Ducheds, [Sensation They kneel ; Krxe joins their hands, Krxo. Bless you, my children! [They retire up] And now, my dear, we will consider tho verdict. Quem. Nothing of the sort; sentence fret, vondiob after wal ‘Axton (scornfully). Nonsense! Quen, What did you say? Auton. Stuff and nonsense! Who ever heard of having the sentence first ? ALICE IN WONDERLAND, 3 yexN, Off with her head! Seize her, guardst a [Guards surround Atice with spears and staves, Axice (dflantly), Come on! who's afraid? You're nothing, bint a paltry pack of cards! BAINY PLAD break up in confusion, threatening ALsce, who ards af heir atasks with Ber td, 08 if ushing aveay falling leaves ; then escapes, pur tad by trace) They ran ta and ot coored Uights thrown on groupe, All the dramatis one reappear: Hatter with teacup and Preadand butter, and one shoe offs Mook ToR- mz, DonNoust, Grrruox, MancH Hane, wave ov Heants; Wire Rasurt and Duow- 1358 arm én arm ; Cook with pepper cruet, chase ing them: Jat, va and QUES, Que sel ‘ing Kuna in dumb "At the end, scene changes to bank in garden, and ALIOR asleep with fuiries around her, before. Fairies dance a little measure, wi ‘ands over hen head. to break the spell, and dis appear. BINAL CHORUS OF FAIRIES. 2 ee ae ves Resch anaraT [Auton awakening; yawns and stretches; comes down. Ariox. Why, I must have been asleep—and you never would believe what a funny dream P've had! create a = CURTAIN.