Olivia Foley

Mr. Smith

H 11 ELA

25 January 2024

Mid Year Reflection

Progress is what everyone is looking to strive for in life. For such a big word, progress can be

found in both the big things and the little things. So when it comes to my writing progress over the past 5

months I’m looking to reflect upon my improvements and struggles.

Throughout my writings of evidence through the semester I have found that in some pieces I have

struggled and other times flourished. Such as in my argumentative essay piece it showed that I can tend to

go on about statistics and other information in a more messy and disorganized manner. When trying to

portray Lebron James’s greatness in the essay end up going on a rant of all of his accolades when I write,

“James has been awarded some of the most prestigious awards in the NBA, he has 4 NBA Most Valuable

Player Awards (MVP), 4 NBA Finals Most Valuable Player Awards (Finals MVP), he’s led his team to 4

NBA Titles, 6 All Defense Team awards, 19 All NBA Team selections, a Rookie of The Year Award, 3

NBA All-Star Game Kobe Bryant MVP Awards, 19 All-Star appearance”(Is the King the Goat?, Foley).

My use of listing these awards can cause the reader to get bored or perhaps feel cluttered. So in my more

recent work I have drifted away from listing any of my evidence to avoid this situation by spreading

certain evidence like this further apart to help the reader not be overwhelmed.

During the analysis pieces I feel that I have progressed my work and been able to focus more on

the central important themes of my essay and not get distracted by anything else in my writing. After the

quote I am organized and get right to the point that I am trying to make. These skills are shown when I

write, “‘That summer he disappeared he’d wanted to take Buck with him... he asked mom and dad if he

could come get Buck, but they said no... My parents can’t help wondering—and I admit that I can’t, either

—how things might have turned out different if Chris had taken Buck with him. Chris didn’t think twice
about risking his own life, but he never would have put Buckley in any kind of danger. There’s no way he

would have taken the same kind of chances if Buck had been with him.’”(Krakauer, 128). When Carine,

Chris McCandless’s sister, is talking about Chris and his decisions about leaving, after his death, the

reader is able to learn more about who McCandless was as a person. After learning about McCandless’s

interactions with his family and even his dog shows how considerate and kind he is to the people and

animals around them.”(How a Non-Linear Writing Structure Creates More Depth in, Into The Wild,

Foley). I remain on topic after the quote and waste no time getting to my point. This helps keep the reader

engaged throughout the rest of my essay.

Throughout my essays I have usually tended to dislike writing thesis’s. But as I have been able to

develop my skills over time I have gotten better. Such as during my American dream essay I was able to

sort my ideas together to create a recurring idea that stayed relevant throughout the entire essay. I have

struggled in the past in creating a successful topic to base a whole essay on, this essay I began to feel

much more confident. My American dream essay started by saying, “Lack of control, depression, mood

swings. These are just a few of the side effects of being an addict. America has millions of people every

year that are overcome by this affliction, it takes complete control over someone's life and keeps them

away from truly living at all. The sickness of addiction that happens in America keeps U.S. citizens from

achieving the American dream.”(Addiction Keeping Americans From Achieving The American Dream,

Foley). I set the tone early by talking about the dangers addiction causes with its side effects and how

these effects will destroy someone’s life. Doing this I hoped to instill a bit of fear into the reader,

especially by repeating the risk addiction has on one's hopes and dreams.

After a whole semester mainly focusing on writing essays I still feel that I have a lot to learn and

develop. So after looking over my work I hope to reflect on the goods and bads my writing has to offer. I

only intend to take positives of my writing from semester 1 into semester 2.