Funny Maud Sparkle

A Short Story
by Writer Unknown
Annabelle Godfrey looked at the ripped guillotine in her hands and felt angry.

She walked over to the window and reflected on her sleepy surroundings. She had
always loved deserted Sludgeside with its jealous, jolly jungle. It was a place
that encouraged her tendency to feel angry.

Then she saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the figure of
Maud Sparkle. Maud was a funny lawyer with ugly arms and ginger spots.

Annabelle gulped. She glanced at her own reflection. She was an admirable, vile,
brandy drinker with fat arms and squat spots. Her friends saw her as a wandering,
warty wally. Once, she had even made a cup of tea for a watery puppy.

But not even an admirable person who had once made a cup of tea for a watery puppy,
was prepared for what Maud had in store today.

The clouds danced like boating snakes, making Annabelle sneezy.

As Annabelle stepped outside and Maud came closer, she could see the famous smile
on her face.

"I am here because I want some more Facebook friends," Maud bellowed, in a violent
tone. She slammed her fist against Annabelle's chest, with the force of 3623
tortoises. "I frigging love you, Annabelle Godfrey."

Annabelle looked back, even more sneezy and still fingering the ripped guillotine.
"Maud, I am your father," she replied.

They looked at each other with anxious feelings, like two annoying, alive aardvarks
chatting at a very selfish birthday party, which had trance music playing in the
background and two thoughtful uncles thinking to the beat.

Annabelle regarded Maud's ugly arms and ginger spots. She held out her hand. "Let's
not fight," she whispered, gently.

"Hmph," pondered Maud.

"Please?" begged Annabelle with puppy dog eyes.

Maud looked ambivalent, her body blushing like a thundering, tight teapot.

Then Maud came inside for a nice glass of brandy.

THE END