Chapter 37: Math Club At the beginning of the year Stoney had gotten the Math club back

together, and wed had several meetings. At the first one Leah showed up with a friend of hers named Simon Stewart whom she introduced with This is Simon. Hes better than me. My impression was that Stoney was in charge of membership so wasnt sure this was appropriate. Its not like we had rules or anything, but if we let in any Tom, Dick and Harry mathematician who walked down the sidewalk, what kind of club would we be? Simon was short, wore stylish spectacles and very snappy, colorful, clothes, and couldnt be mistaken for a straight person at a hundred paces. He was the first openly, exuberantly, flamboyantly homosexual person Id ever met. He was also incredibly cheerful. Stoney, as our leader, introduced Simon to the rest of us: Simon, you know Leah, and this is Cecil, this is Raheem, and this is my gay friend Henry. Oh, for heavens sake, said Simon. Henrys not gay. Hes not? Leah and Stoney asked, at the same time. Oh, for heavens sake. I have the best gaydar in the world. Not a blip on Henry. Ive heard all about you, though, he said to Stoney. Did I guess right, that you took your nickname from the Stonewall riots? Stoney kind of looked down, embarrassed, and damned if he didnt blush. No, no. Nothing like that, he said, after a pause. My real name is Thomas Henry Jackson, just like the Confederate general. Well, fiddle-dee-dee, said Simon. Stoney blushed again. A man in his forties showed up with an order pad in his hand. What you folks want to drink? asked the waiter. Wheres Robin? Stoney asked. Oh, I had to let her go. Turned out she was underage, he said. Underage, how? Stoney asked. She told me she was eighteen, but then I come to find out that she was really just fifteen. Sophomore at Hillsboro High. The state is very strict that people serving alcohol have to be over eighteen, so I didnt have any choice. She was a great waitress, though. I really, really liked her. But. Cant risk my license. Ah, fuck, said Stoney.

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Let me guess, I said. No please dont said Stoney. Beer? said the owner. A pitcher of Heineken for me, said Stoney. And a Pitcher of Schlitz for the rest of the table, said Cecil. Can I get a Coke? asked Leah. And a glass of ice water? I asked. He nodded and left. So whats going on at that end of the table? asked Leah. Stoner done tapped him some jailbait, said Raheem. Id really rather not talk about this, Stoney said. She insisted she was eighteen. Tom, I think this is an opportunity for you to reflect on the decisions you make regarding the objects of your affection, I said, which provoked a few laughs. Oh, I think Henr is closer to the truth than he knows, said Simon. Somebody else came back with our drinks. Its actually not that odd for someone whos confused about things to have, oh, shall we say, age-inappropriate sexual partners, in my vast experience, he said. Im not following this, I said. Not in a rude way. I was just confused. No. No, you wouldnt, Simon said. Stoney had managed to drain three glasses of beer and was pouring another. Goodness, how thirsty you are, said Simon. Oh, Stoner just gettin started, said Raheem. After we ordered pizza we discussed what to work on, and Leah suggested the Navier-Stokes equations.1 Stoney and Cecil immediately complained that this was another attempt to push us out of pure math and into physics.

The Navier-Stokes equations are powerful equations that describe the movement of fluids. Because from a mathematical viewpoint, fluid includes both liquids and gasses, the equations have a wide variety of applications.

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I dont think its even physics. I think of it as engineering,2 said Leah. Thats not the point. Mathematically, theres no proof that, as three dimensional equations, the equations are smooth. Nobody can demonstrate that theres no singularity, she said. There was a long pause around the table. Equations either work or they dont. How long have they been around? asked Cecil. Nineteenth Century, said Simon. There was a big engineering explosion in the 1920s, though, thats when they really moved into the mainstream. So youre a homo? asked Cecil, out of the blue. Yes, darling, said Simon. Is this going to bother you? Cecil thought. No, I guess not. I just was never around a homo before. Were okay, I promise. I wont bite. Is it all right if I call you a Negro? Simon asked. Cecil and Raheem both sat up at this. I prefer Black, said Cecil. In exactly the same way, I prefer gay to homo, said Simon, then smiled. Okay. Gay. Gotcha, said Cecil. There was a moment, then Cecil picked the conversation back up. Okay, so the Napier-Stokes equations, all of us know them, but nobodys figured out if they work? Nope, said Leah, Simon, and Raheem, all at once. How the fuck do you do this? said Cecil to Raheem. Do what bro? said Raheem. Whenever I dont know about something, you know all about it, said Cecil. I had good teachers, said Raheem. Okay, said Leah. So Ill mail everybody some introductory materials about the equations, and everybody can play with them, and maybe another meeting in two weeks? Scrumptious, said Simon, looking at Stony.

Mathematicians and physicists look down on each other. Both look down on engineers. Engineers never go for graduate degrees, the others always do. But then, engineers build all of the bridges and power plants. Go to a construction site, hand a mathematician a hammer, and see what happens.

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