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The tale of a father with More News

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Published: Sunday | May 17, 2020 | 12:06 AM
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“My younger years saw my very ambitious father working an

extremely good job and providing for his family. Before that,
even, his mother, my grandmother, was an esteemed woman
with a great societal position back in the days, and they were
sort of among the highest of the middle-income echelon. So
Daddy was one of the few people who was privileged to get a
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 university education back then. Naturally, he landed a great
job,” she shared.

Sophia explained that somewhere along the lines of his life, GLEANER TRIVIA
When did Jamaica become
her father meddled in substance abuse, and things took a
independent?
plunge into what she described as an irredeemable sea of
doom.

According to her, “He was abusive to my mother, so we left. SKIP

He later left his job, and things just kept getting worse. We
couldn’t get support to go to school, and, I don’t know, but he
11 March 1958
was just different. He kept using, and though he’d hide it from
me, I knew every time when he was under the influence. 26 May 1969

Headlines Delivered to Your Inbox 6 August 1962

Sign up for The Gleaner’s morning and evening newsletters. 18 December 1971

“He always shared his big dreams, and I was always in

0/0
support of them, but now, I realise that maybe I could have
done more.”

A tearful Sophia went on to share that she had endured much

watching her father waste away what could have been a good
life and that she now is trying to convince herself that it isn’t
her fault.

“I keep wondering if there is something that I could have done

to steer him back to life. This began when I was about three
years old, and I’ve had to watch it worsen all the days of my
life since. I try to tell myself that I was too young to help and
that by the time I got to an age where I could make sensible
decisions, that he was too far gone.

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 “But what if…,” she questioned as her voice trailed off.

The Christian woman told Family & Religion that she often
prays for her father and holds on to faith that God will work
upon what seems like an impossible situation.

“Simply put, his life is literally in shambles right now. He’s not
healthy enough to work, nor does he have anyone he can
really depend on. I try my best to do what I can do, but it’s
really a depressing situation all around.

“Others have tried to encourage me, saying he chose the life

he wanted and I shouldn’t be blaming myself, but every time I
think about it, it puts me in a sad mood,” Sophia said.

She continued, “My reason for sharing, really, is, even though
I’m yet to overcome whatever this is, I know there are others
who may be faced with the same or a similar situation. We
are not our parents’ keeper. We do not have to carry their
burdens, and their sins will not be on our shoulders. My
advice is, do the best you can for them, continue in prayer,
and hope that they will be willing enough to help themselves
get up and get out.”

*Name changed.

familyandreligion@gleanerjm.com

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