mental aesthetics (how to build a beautiful mind)

1 message

Dan Koe <dan@thedankoe.com> Sat, Sep 9, 2023 at 19:54

Reply-to: dan@thedankoe.com
To: Anonymous <subhratoddi@gmail.com>

The Koe Letter

September 7, 2023
Read the online version here.

Warning: this is the longest letter I've written to date.

I'd recommend reading the online version above and possibly adding it to an app like
Readwise Reader.

Enjoy.

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One of the best compliments you can get is "I like the way your mind works."

And when I was young, I always envied those more intelligent than me.

How did they do it?

How did they articulate their thoughts so well?

How did they say what I've been thinking for years but couldn't string into words?

How did they hold high-level conversations with a sense of understanding that
leaves you feeling awestruck, but like you are so far below them on the level of
knowledge?

I've tried to emulate the voice of the stoics, ancients, and modern masters. Soon I
realized that language evolved for a reason. We have a more diverse toolset to
pierce through the noise and acquire truth.

The poeticism of Watts.

The pithy advice of Seneca.

The crypticism of Nietsche.

The elegance of Peterson.

There was a gravity to their words that stuck in the back of my head.

In reflection, it led me to where I am today.

I always wanted to do something creative.

I knew that I didn't want to earn a living from my body, or my time for that matter. I
had to earn with my mind.

This led me down a brutal path of life and business failures that led to the discovery
and cultivation of high-value skills.

Design, marketing, sales, technology, programming, writing, film, and more that
trained my mind for creative problem-solving.

Today, I am grateful to say that I can earn a living and sustain a high quality of life by
moving two levers: the inputs and outputs of my mind.

In this letter, I want to discuss 4 big ideas:

1. Your mental body and how it rules your life.

2. How mental bodybuilding is your path to intelligence.

3. Why mental real estate is the most valuable resource.

4. How to monetize your mind to create your own source of income.

Mental aesthetics is your master key to the doors of the good life.

A final reminder:

The last Solopreneur Sprints for building the foundation of your one-person business
starts in 3 days.

If you want to turn yourself into a business, talk about your interests, and build a
readership for better career opportunities (and discover your life's work) join here
before enrollment closes.

I - The Mental Body

In the book Psycho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Waltz, there's a phenomenon that

surgery patients radically change their lives after changing their physical
appearance.
Many patients went on to achieve their wildest dreams.

The dreams they didn't think were possible before, even if the "blemish" that held
them back was as simple as a bump on their nose (that was unnoticeable to the
average eye).

But it wasn't the physical appearance that made the difference.

It was the change in self-image.

A change in the body they held as a mental construct, one that often didn't reflect
their physical appearance.

This brings up the principle of expectations vs reality.

Humans tend to latch onto thoughts, ideas, and beliefs to make sense of the world
and aid their survival.

We hold an idea of the past or future in our mind, and if present reality doesn't match,
tension is the result.

Tension narrows the mind and creates stress.

It prevents you from seeing the world as it is, because it isn't supposed to be
anything other than what it's being.

When we hold an image of who we think we are in our mind, even when we've never
directly seen our own face outside of external reflections, anything that challenges
that image is seen as a threat.

Even fitness models voted to have the most aesthetic physique in the eyes of the
masses have body dysmorphia.

Hell, even I have body dysmorphia after being in the gym for 10 years.

The image of who they are does not match their appearance.

This influences how we perceive and interpret the world around us.

Something as simple as the idea of an unhealthy meal can send a fitness model into
an emotional spiral of rage, self-hatred due to a past binge, and the urge to preach
that all people should abide by the diet ideology that they subscribe to.

The same holds true for everything we think we are.

From religious beliefs to budgeting techniques to the business models and jobs that
allow us to survive, our identity turns sour when we create permanence in our minds
that does not match the impermanence of life.

I.i - Conceptual Survival

As above, so below.

Humans survive on both the physical and mental planes of existence.

Yes, if there is a bear charging towards you, your life flashes before your eyes.

But even then, I would argue that humans only survive on the mental plane of
existence.

When a bear charges toward you, you aren't really worried about your physical body.
You're worried about the idea of it.

You're also worried about the friends, family, career, and whatever other idea you will
lose that flood your mind in time before your life ends.

Your "self" is what you are trying to survive.

And if it's threatened, you feel it.

If you are attached to a sports team and someone says that team sucks, how do you
feel?

If you are subscribed to a specific religion and someone tells you theirs is better,
how do you feel? Do you want to replicate what's in your mind into theirs through
communication so your mental offspring can survive in hopes that you convert
them?

If you identify as a coffee drinker and run out of coffee, is your day ruined?

In reality, all is well.

You aren't in true danger, and your physical body changes on a cellular level every
second. You are not your body, because your body is 100% different than it was 7
years ago. You are consciousness.

When you attempt to make anything permanent you increase the chances of
suffering.

To play the game of life you must choose what is worth suffering for and dedicate
your life to that.

Successful people use their emotions. Unsuccessful people are used by them.

I.ii - The Lesson: Releasing Concepts

Self-development is cognitive development.

To develop, expand, and grow yourself - not to be confused with inflating your ego -
you must release the ideas that prevent you from rising up like sandbags tied to a
hot air balloon.

When you feel tension, stress, or negative emotions arise you must train yourself to
pause.

This is a lifelong pursuit of mindfulness.

It is a habit that must be adopted to achieve the good life.

It is not optional.

When you pause, identify both the expectation in your mind and the reality of the
situation.

We don't want to be at war with life, we want to be at one with it.

We don't want to fight with it, but flow with it.

Let go of the irrational beliefs that hold you back and act regardless of how you feel,
because you can.

II - Mental Bodybuilding

When most people have a sense of self that is the product of the external
world, you have the chance to peel back the layers. You can build a self that
is a conscious, personal creation that works less, earns more, and enjoys life.
- The Art Of Focus

The highest-paid individuals are the strategists, visionaries, and true creatives of the
world.

The most fulfilled individuals are the ones who have control over their minds.
The people who get what they want have developed a self that makes their ideal
future inevitable.

Your "self" is an idea.

A concept.

A set of beliefs that are conditioned into your mind through learning. And when we
are young, we absorb external information like a sponge.
This information is often passed down by your parents who were influenced by
society, the government, and culture - especially if they don't question those beliefs.
This is exactly how you live a mediocre life.

By doing what everyone else tells you to do.

By letting your attention be stolen from you.

By waking up one day after doing exactly what you were told would lead to
happiness, but only having unhappiness to show for it.

Mental bodybuilding is the act of chiseling your psychic body to the point of ideal
outcomes in health, wealth, relationships, and happiness.

To craft your ideal mental physique, accept that the path will be painful.

Right now "you" are a blob of limitations that were projected on you.

Your job is to become aware of these limitations, release them, and increase your
complexity of self.

"Complexity of self" is the knowledge, skill, and beliefs you have that determines the
amount of clarity you can generate as you navigate life.

A clear mind is an asset in an unclear world.

Clarity, or making sense, or ordered consciousness is the prime ingredient for life
enjoyment.

The problem is that most people are anxious, overwhelmed, and uncertain when it
comes to doing what they want.

II.i - Information Metabolism

Life is experience and experience is information.

Your mind dictates your quality of life because your development dictates how you
process information, or how you process life.

When you are overwhelmed with information, you feel anxious.

When you are underwhelmed with information, you feel bored.

To maximize the flow of information, think of your mind as the digestive system of
reality.

If you eat too much or don't move enough, you won't metabolize that experience.
If you eat too little or move too much, you get hungry and agitated.

When you eat just enough, you create an environment that is conducive to mental
muscle growth. You trek through reality toward your goals. You enter a season of
pure progress, and the feeling is incredible.

II.ii - Bulking & Cutting

In fitness, you build muscle by creating an environment conducive to muscle growth.

You need ample food, sleep, intensity of training, and consistency.

You will gain a bit of fat along the way. This is inevitable if you want to see
noticeable results.

At some point, you start feeling off.

You feel groggy and slow, and you don't like how soft you look in the mirror.

To reveal the newly built muscle, you change your environment to reflect your new
goal.

You decrease the amount of food you eat - or increase the amount of training you do
- in a way that maintains the muscle you've built in your bulking phase.

A key point:

You need a conscious goal for each chapter of life.

A goal provides both vision and a narrative that orders your mind.

The two main themes of a chapter will be consistency or intensity.

A goal, vision, and narrative for your life provides you with a perceptual filter to digest
the right information. We can think of these as the mechanisms for nutrient
partitioning.

When you utilize the right parts of the information you consume, you build muscle
faster than you would otherwise.

To build your mental physique, you must push the boundaries of the unknown.

Try new things, fly across the country, start the business, and flood yourself with
information so you can filter the insight that allows you to do those things well.

When you hit a wall, peel back.

Rest, recover, and shed your mind of the fat you've acquired along the way through
awareness and understanding.

It's okay to take a break after a chapter of progress.

II.iii - Training The Mind

Short-form content is the current language of the internet.

The average individual has trained their mind to think small, remain narrow, and have
difficulty seeing into a positive future.

Training your mind is training your the idea of your self.

Your self, or identity, is limited by your worldview.

To expand who we are to the point of vast knowledge, experience, and expertise we
must expand our minds beyond superficial pleasures and problems.

Read longer books. Listen to longer podcasts. Have deeper conversations with those
close to you.

Break out of the mindless cycle of circulating the ideas of sex, money, and
indulgence without a philosophical backbone of mastery.

Remember, you need a goal for your life.

An aim.

Something to move towards and align your decision-making with.

This will be useful for your mental output.

Consumption can only go so far without creation.

It's like over-eating without lifting. Most of it will be stored as fat. You don't utilize the
nutrients to their maximum effect.

Reading, listening, and consuming must be balanced with writing, speaking, and
building a product that contributes to humanity. That is how you find connection and
fulfillment.

We will tie all of this together into practical steps at the end of this letter. Stay with
me.

II.iv - Meaningful Events

When the flow of information is maximized in your life through the balance of
consumption and creation, you will encounter meaningful events.
You will feel a deep sense of excitement for the future, fulfillment in the present, and
gratitude for the past.

These feelings should be seen as an opportunity to document the important parts of

your life that you can share with others.

When you read a good book and stumble across a lesson that sparks excitement,
write it down.

When you feel fulfilled in the present because of the progress you are making, write
it down.

When you feel grateful that your past has led you to this moment, despite your
mistakes, write it down.

As your notes of signal grow, you have data from which you can replicate those
experiences.

You can condition your mind to occupy these states of consciousness as a baseline.

Your quality of life increases to a point of high stability.

II.v - The Lesson: Explore The Unknown

You aren't where you want to be because you've been where you are for a bit too
long.

The way you expand your mind (and potential) is by solving the problems that stand
in the way of your goals.

Your goals lie in the unknown.

The thought of the unknown creates tension and fear.

What is it costing you to put off solving the problems in your life?

Person 1 decides to solve the problem in a day.

Person 2 decides to put up with the pain of stagnation and either solve it in a month,
or not at all.

Person 1 will achieve 30 goals by the time person 2 achieves 1.

You hate your job, but its pain is not stronger than your fear of the unknown, so you
don't pursue the goal of doing your own thing.

You hate where you live, but not enough to do what's required to move out.
You hate your partner, but not enough to develop a bit of self-respect.

Snap out of your narrow way of living.

Fall in love with the lessons you learn from relentlessly pursuing your goals.

III - Mental Real Estate

Whether they be positive or negative, the ideas that occupy the collective
mental real estate will influence the progress we make as a species. The
future belongs to those that can capture and hold attention with valuable
information for the most amount of time possible. - The Art Of Focus

Who wrote the code in your head?

That is to say, who fed you the information, ideas, beliefs, perspectives, and
worldviews that create your sense of self?

Let's consider your "self" as an intellectual construct.

A psychic body.

A house that can be occupied, nurtured, or destroyed by the tenants you allow to live
there rent-free.

In comes the internet.

In comes social media.

Just like that, we have thousands upon thousands of ideas shaping who we are, how
we act, and what we care about on a daily basis.

Most people don't even know why they are doing what they are doing.

That alone is a great way to audit your life.

If you don't know why you are going to that class, going to that job, marrying that
person, or doing anything that you do, you did not create yourself.

Sustained long-term focus is a lost art in a distracted world, and it's wreaking havoc
on our ability to achieve anything meaningful.

III.i - Flipping The Social Switch

Social media is the devil if you perceive it that way.

Social media is the vessel for your potential if you perceive it that way.
How you perceive opportunities depends on your self-development.

You won't see a viral social media post as inspiration if you don't identify as a writer.

You won't see a business owner's complaint as a potential lead if you don't identify
as a consultant or service business owner.

Most people see cliche advice as "cringe" because they identify as mediocre thanks
to an abundance of self-deprecating memes occupying their worldview.

Social media is the virtual reality to achieve your potential.

Entrepreneurship is the only logical option for long-term thinkers.

A personal brand is an extension of your character, the self you continue to develop.
Your goals are what attract like-minded players.

Your problems, when solved, are how you help others in the form of a product or
service.

Your ideas are the posts that occupy the mental real estate of your followers and
shape their sense of self.

Writing and speaking your beautiful mind to the masses through social media is how
you check the boxes of a fulfilling life.

III.ii - Reproduction Through Spirit

When you have children, you create a "self."

Yes, their physical body has your "blood," but who they are is a result of the ideas you
inject into their mind.

With that knowledge, we are reproducing on a spiritual level every day.

Each conversation you have, idea you spread, or belief you defend is for the sake of
conceptual survival.

Your sense of self becomes immortal because your ideas live in the minds of others.
They shape the selves of the world.

This is why writing, speaking, and building a business is so rewarding. You feel that
sense of connection and fulfillment that comes from impacting lives at scale.

III.iii - We Are In A Spiritual War

Those who occupy the most mental real estate hold the most power in the modern
world.

Think of James Clear.

Most people are aware of his book Atomic Habits.

If James posted the word "habits," he would get thousands of likes and reposts.

If anyone else posted that word, even with the same amount of followers, they would
get much less engagement.

This brings up a few lessons:

The longer you hold attention, the more power your ideas hold. Books will
always reign supreme. Podcasts and long videos come second. Short content
comes last. But all have their use cases.

Your ideas must spark positive behavior change. If you change someone's
life, they will credit you over and over for your success. Meaning, your ideas
spread without people consuming your work.

When your ideas change lives, you hold attention longer. If someone is
forming new habits, James Clear's ideas will occupy their mind throughout the
day, which shapes their identity. They become a half-child of Clear.

Short-form writing is for initial attention capture and audience growth. Long-form
writing is for nurturing the mind and self of the reader.

Both are necessary, but short writing without long writing will trap you in a feast or
famine cycle. Your ideas will not live in people's heads for long.

People try to talk about whatever they want online and fail because they don't
understand this realization.

If I write a book (this is why I did) I can expand my language online and stop relying
on "proven" or "high-performing" topics to grow.

But beginners can't skip this step.

Unless you are a best-selling offer, your content needs to follow an attention
progression. You must emulate validated ideas (like viral tweets or videos) while
slowly building authority with long-form media.

When it comes to business, your life's work, or just writing online it is a spiritual war
of ideas.
Engagement tactics and growth hacks are helpful to spread your ideas, but will
those ideas live on through eternity by the selves they create?

III.iv - The Spirituality Of Entrepreneurship

Self-development is a gateway drug into entrepreneurship because you realize that

improving others is the next level of improving yourself.

Attention is the root of your being.

It is both reality and your connection to it.

Improving yourself is improving where you focus your attention.

Most people are focused on the next pleasurable experience. Wise people are
focused on the problems that the pleasure seekers are hiding from.

Find a problem.
Learn how to solve it.
Document how you solved it.
Distill into a replicable process.
Give it to others that want to be helped.

Do it offline and it's called growth.

Do it online and it's called business.

Spirituality is feeling like you are a part of something greater than yourself. It is
reuniting with the one thing that has always been: the unity and connection of all
things.

Business is spirituality in that you are attempting to raise the collective

consciousness or development through the exchange of goods.

III.v - Action Steps

Study that which generates attention.

Psychology, media, design, writing, marketing, sales, persuasion, influence, and the
mind.

Study yourself.

Your thoughts, emotions, actions, and follow them to their root. What goals,
problems, and beliefs have others projected on you that led to those thoughts,
emotions, and actions?

This may sound like a lot, but you have an entire lifetime to make this work, no?
What's the only other option? Distracting yourself with mind-numbing pleasures that
entrench you in the same boring life?

The only pain greater than seeing what you are capable of is not seeing what you are
capable of.

Your education should, and must, reflect that.

IV - Mental Monetization

It's 2023.

You have the resources to revamp your education, enhance your skill set, and change
the source of your income in less time than it would take to get a college degree.

But there's a trap that many fall into.

They attempt to monetize the va