TedX speech

Authenticity as Currency: Navigating Identity Through Vulnerability

Opening Sentence

Imagine a world where the currency of connection, success, and fulfilment is authenticity. That
would be an interesting form of capitalism. My question is - how rich would you be? Today, l will
explore how embracing vulnerability, and trading in authenticity, can lead us to wealth beyond
measure as we are thrown into adulthood.

Introduction

Would you describe yourself as someone who wears their heart on their sleeve? I certainly
wouldn’t have not too long ago. Whatever your answer to that question is, I would like you to
imagine your latest heavy emotion on your sleeve - everyone can see what you’re feeling. As
I’ve mentioned, today we will look at these emotions as currency. Now everyone can see your
balance. Scary, right?

I used to be very ignorant of my feelings, to figuratively pretend they never existed in the first
place; I preferred to be comfortably ignorant of my emotions, to be ‘happy’ – as I thought I would
be if i just said ‘I’m okay’ yet again. That was, until I was forced to stop seeing the allure in
comfort - I had to be honest with myself during a past connection to somebody. I needed to exit
that space and be on my own; to not rely on this person to be okay, to not create my own future
based on their decisions and behaviour. To say things I was scared of admitting, like I’m not
actually okay with existing like this. I don’t want to live like this. To stand up to myself and stop
allowing the comfortable blur of illusionary attachment back me away from growing into a better,
more authentic version of myself and creating the life I desire.

Authenticity and vulnerability are usually words that get thrown around quite often. But I’m here
to show you that instead of being so terrifying, they’re actually very valuable resources -
currencies - for our lives. How come?

These two words are essentially the ‘capital’ needed to be invested to achieve lucrative returns -
personal growth. The more vulnerable you allow yourself to be , the more you have invested in
discovering your true views/emotions towards certain aspects of your life. This insight would
lead you to higher levels of authenticity as you act upon your genuine desires.

The Authenticity Deficit

First, let’s define what a deficit is - when there’s a deficiency of something that impacts product
x negatively. So, what is the deficit of authenticity?
I like to define it as the expenditure of connection to yourself, which leads to masking and
conformity. Big words, right?
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When you ‘hide’ yourself in a facade - a mask - that doesn’t represent who you are, what you
see your passions/purpose to be, that’s masking. Conformity is described by the Oxford
dictionary as behavior in accordance with socially accepted conventions. To phrase this in
context, it is the compliance with what your social surroundings deem the best - which isn’t
always what you know is right for you. By sacrificing your authentic voice to follow these set
social standards, you lose the autonomy of your mind to your background. It is hard to imagine
how you can evolve as a person by the pace of other people; it is irrevocable that you cannot if
you let others dictate your passions, your career, your multi-aspect views.

It is even harder to get out of that rigid mindset once it has ingrained itself – what if you become
isolated? Lose the people who have helped structure your own worth through their opinions?
Lose so much that all you’re left with is the barren canvas of your unfulfilled mind? Then who
have you become – not your true self, but a collection of fragments of other people that lives
through you.

The rising interest rate of insecurity and judgment

Now that we have unpacked what conformity and masking is, why do we do it? Because we
want to be accepted, to be liked. This mindset very usually stems from a fear/ insecurity of being
judged and abandoned. So, we cover up the quirks, the scars that make us us and question –
can I fit in? To be accepted by other people is a core human desire but the acceptance we seek
from others is conditional – if you don’t fit the standard for who you should be in a particular
setting, then you’re not ‘worth’ being a part of it. That is what I call the rising interest rate of
insecurity and judgement – the more you let yourself be scrutinised into a ‘likeable’ mold, the
more insecure and judgemental you yourself become (against others and your true self).

As Martin Luther King Jr. said in Strength To Love, ‘Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only
light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that’.

What if instead of looking for acceptance that is transiently conditional, we look inwards at
ourselves – and accept who we are? There are parts of you that you won’t like – slumps of
places that you wouldn’t normally invest in. But if taken care of properly instead of being
neglected, they can prosper into assets you’re proud of. Freeing yourself from internal
judgement will show you how irrelevant anybody but your opinion of yourself.

How to do this? Sit down. No distractions. Where do your thoughts go? What are you feeling?
Emotions are nothing more than indicators – you’re not defined by them, but the actions you
take as a response to them. Embrace them, but don’t let them absorb you into doing things that
are harmful for you. Sit with them and reflect. Why do I feel like this? What core beliefs have
been triggered? What is the best thing i can do to soothe myself instead of beating down my
feelings?
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Retrospection on your emotions and triggers, self-compassion will aid you in removing this veil
of judgement. You deserve kindness, and you deserve to be proud of who you are. Kindness
has leverage above criticism and it’s the fact that it empowers you, it is not belittling. You are
bound to become a greater person than you would’ve ever imagined if you believe in yourself
and embrace your flaws.

Building a Portfolio of Genuine Connections

Going back to ‘heart on your sleeve’; now that you’ve become authentically yourself with
acceptance of your vulnerabilities, that courage is on your sleeve, showing to everyone.
Inevitably, you will attract people who value

- Explore the dividends of vulnerability in forming meaningful relationships

- Share personal experiences or case studies that showcase the returns of authentic
connections
- Offer strategies for nurturing authenticity in relationships

Investing in Your Authentic Future - the lucrative outcome

-
investment leads to exponential personal growth and self-discovery
- Encourage the audience to make strategic deposits in their authenticity accounts

Closing Statement

- Reiterate the concept of authenticity as true wealth

- audience to assess and appreciate their own authenticity portfolios
- Conclude with a call to action, inviting everyone to transact in their truest selves, reaping
rewards from it