Everyone's a Critic: An Opposites

Attract Romance: (A Cinnamon Bay

Romance, Collection 4, Book 3) Nikki
Lynn Barrett
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 Everyone's a Critic
(A Cinnamon Bay Romance, Collection Four)
by
Nikki Lynn Barrett
Copyright March 2022 by Nikki Lynn Barrett

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner
whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief
quotations in a book review.

Publisher’s note: This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the
product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events,
locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
 Acknowledgments

Thank you to the Cinnamon Bay Authors, who continue to rock our small town world. Also thanks to
my readers, who always ask when the next book is coming!
 Dedication

“Sometimes the best pairings are opposites. Something brings them together in a unique way, and their
lives will never be the same again!” -The Matchmakers
 Prologue
Laura, 16 years old

“You were warned, Laura. Pick up your grades, or you won’t be getting your license this
summer.” Dad’s look of disapproval cut through her like the sharpest knife.
The start of summer, and she’d been excited to do all of the things, though the moment she
received her report card, her concern over her father’s reaction hindered her happiness.
With good reason, too. Nothing was good enough for this man. B’s were acceptable grades,
damn it!
“But Dad! I got B’s!” Laura Feldmen protested in frustration. “Why isn’t that good enough?”
Why was nothing good enough for him? If it wasn’t one thing to complain about, it was
another. He expected perfection. Laura tried her best, but she came up short. It did something to her
heart every time. She couldn’t deal with living up to high expectations and being told what a
disappointment she was all the time.
He narrowed his eyes, then crossed his arms over his chest. “I said A’s, Laura. A little more
effort would have gone a long way. Instead, you party, flirt with boys, and cause drama for other girls.
This is horrible behavior.”
“Honey,” Mom interjected, “B’s aren’t horrible grades. She has more A’s on there. Why are
you being so down on her about a few B’s?”
“I expected much better from Laura!” His loud, booming voice echoed through the large
office.
She’d had big plans and hope that her father would accept her grades. Laura tried, and hard.
Apparently, that wasn’t good enough.
Her father didn’t know about how difficult it was to focus in school sometimes. There were
other issues, like having to keep an upstanding social status. Private schools, especially, held high
standards in that sense. While she cared about her grades, Laura had wanted to fit in, find ways to feel
less alone in the world, and that consumed her mind more than she cared to admit. Her father, and
most likely her mother, would never understand that.
“What’s this I hear about you bullying Aspen Carmichael?” her father asked.
“No! She’s picking on me!” Laura exclaimed. “She’s horrible. She started it. All I’ve done is
give her a taste of her own medicine. I’m so tired of her being in my face all the time.”
Her mother didn’t seem to believe that one, either. Both parents stared at her as if she’d grown
an extra head.
“It’s not good to lie, Laura,” Dad finally said.
“I’m not! I mean, yeah, I retaliate, but Aspen started it! She’s such a spoiled brat!” Just the
mention of her name sent Laura into a rage. Aspen was the top reason Laura did her best to become
one of the in crowd. Lately, she lived for the competition, and thrived when she won.
Again, things they would never understand.
“No license, Laura, and that’s final.”
Call it a nail in her epic summer coffin. All of her friends had their license or were in the
process of getting it. Even that annoying snot Aspen got hers.
 Laura would be the laughingstock, and she hated to be laughed at.
“It’s not fair!” she shouted, then rushed out of the room before her parents could see her tears.
Her sister waved as she passed by. Laura didn’t stop. She ran to her room and slammed the
door.
Damn that Aspen. If only she’d left her alone, Laura could have done better, but no. Her
fixation on making Aspen’s life as miserable as she did to her took over her mind way too much.
She needed a way to get back at her. Laura didn’t deserve this backlash or humiliation.
It was bad enough she lived through it at home. Why did it have to happen at school and then
during the summer when she had big dreams with her friends?
Something had to be done about that girl, and Laura planned to get on top of that.

*****

Laura’s lips curved up in a satisfied smile as she sat in her best friend’s car, heading down to
the beach for a fun start of summer bonfires. She’d been grounded, but she snuck out and planned to
have fun, no matter what.
Hours of sulking in her room turned to plotting her revenge against Aspen, then her comeback
to Cinnamon Bay for the summer. She’d find a way to get everything she deserved, one way or
another. If it meant taking Aspen down in the process, so be it.
“That’s totally unfair!” Daria said out of the blue.
“Huh? What is?” Laura asked.
“That you don’t get to go for your license. I have C’s, and my parents didn’t freak out on me.”
“You know my father expects no less than perfection. As if he’s perfect,” Laura spat. “I know
his secrets. He had an affair with the cleaning lady once. I caught them.”
“You should use that as leverage,” Daria told her.
“I should.” But she probably wouldn’t. The thought did cross her mind, and she wondered
how far she’d get if she threatened her father with what she knew.
Getting revenge on Aspen Carmichael would be better. That would make her day.
“Is Annoying Aspen going to be there tonight?” Laura asked. “Or is she avoiding her family
because she thinks she’s too good to be home?”
“Probably. She’s desperate for attention. She wants to be the center of it. You know her
parents let her, well, the whole clan, run wild.”
Yeah, they did, and then there was Laura, living under her strict father’s thumb. So unfair. She
wanted to live like Aspen and get whatever she wanted, not feel like if she was anything less than
perfect, then she wasn’t good enough at all.
It hurt.
People assumed because she came from money and had the perfect life. They couldn’t be
more wrong. Laura couldn’t hide the loneliness. All she wanted was to belong and feel like she was
worth something.
Daria pulled into a parking spot. “You know, I’ll let you drive my car anyway.”
She perked up. “Really?”
“Yeah. Why should you miss out because your dad’s a jerk.” Daria looped her arm through
Laura’s as they walked toward the crowd of eager teens, ready to celebrate the end of school and the
start of summer fun. “I’ve got your back. Who cares about stupid grades anyway? How much of that
crap are we gonna use later in life anyway?”
“Yeah, exactly!” Laura exclaimed, already feeling better. She’d make the best of this summer,
no matter who got in her way!
Laura promised herself she’d have fun. Too bad that didn’t last long. Someone must have said
something, because people were pointing and laughing at her already.
What the hell? Who’d said what? Cinnamon Bay wasn’t a big town, but Laura wasn’t sure
what was being said about her right now.
She’d find out eventually. Right now, she would ignore it and stick to her promise. Fun. She
needed it. Deserved it.
A half an hour in, Laura finally snapped. “Mind telling me what’s so funny?” Damn it, she’d
given it her best, but so many people were continuously watching her. It became too distracting and no
one had dared to come say anything to her face.
“Poor Laura still has to depend on everyone else to drive her around,” one guy snickered.
Shame lit her up like a night full of fireworks. “Who told?” Laura whispered. How? How had
word gotten out already? Her sisters? Did they gossip about her in town when others were nearby,
eager to spread the word?
“I have no idea,” Daria replied. “Forget them. Let’s have fun.”
“That was what I wanted to do,” she muttered, “but this staring is too much.
“Look, the crowd is already focusing on something else.” Daria pointed. “What do you think?
A fight? Drinking contest? Half naked girl?”
As much as she didn’t want the negative attention, Laura didn’t like the fact that she hadn’t
become the life of the party yet.
She spotted Aspen, dancing with a hula hoop to music. Infuriating girl. She marched over to
her and kicked the hula hoop. Ha! Laura couldn’t help but laugh.
Aspen glowered. “What the hell is your problem?”
“You’re my problem!” Laura shouted, clenching her hands into tight fists. “You ruin
everything!” Aspen probably had nothing to do with the rumors, but hey, while she was here, Laura
could give a little back to this obnoxious twit. Her foul mood fueled the anger.
Aspen rolled her eyes. “You’re so dramatic. This party’s big enough for the both of us. Go
away and leave me alone, you nasty bitch!”
“Fight, fight, fight!” Party-goers started to chant.
Be careful what you wish for.
Laura wanted attention, and now she got it. Not quite in the way she’d hoped, but oh well. No
turning back now.
She didn’t want to fight, but Aspen apparently needed to be put in her place.
“So you want to be the center of attention?” Aspen asked, stepping closer, her face contorted
in anger. “I guess you got your wish now, didn’t you?”
Uncanny how she practically read her mind, actually. “I’m not the one dressed like a floozy,
showing off all of my body parts for the guys to oogle over, while dancing with a hula hoop.”
“I’ve had enough of you, Laura! Shut your mouth! Look at what you’re wearing! Dressed to
impress?” Aspen pointed to the string holding Laura’s halter top. “One little tug, and the girls will be
on display for everyone to see!”
Before she could smack her hand away, Aspen did just that. Tugged on the string.
Of course, Laura didn’t have a bra on with this outfit, and her breasts were out. Photos were
snapped. Guys were cheering. Some even booing.
Most of the girls were laughing.
Laura slapped Aspen across the face and darted off, hiding behind a bunch of boulders as she
tried to put herself back together. A rogue tear slid down her cheek. It wasn’t a tear of embarrassment,
just anger. Pure anger for the retched girl who took too much enjoyment ruining her life.
“I’ll get you back, Aspen. Just you watch,” Laura vowed.

*****

An hour later, Laura held her phone up, camera on, as she watched Aspen break down in a fit
of tears. She didn’t know why, nor did she care. Aspen probably deserved whatever happened to her
that brought on this breakdown. She’d find a way to get the scoop on what caused Aspen to cry later.
Right now, she didn’t care. She snapped a couple of photos, then made her quick disappearance. She
didn’t need Aspen to see her.
Not until she got what she needed.
Payback time. Laura didn’t expect it this soon, let alone tonight, but she’d claim victory after
the way Aspen humiliated her earlier.
“Hey, have you seen Aspen?” someone asked Laura as she drifted through the crowd of
people.
She shrugged. “No, not in a while. She’s probably off throwing a fit like she usually does.”
“I’m worried about her.”
“Who cares?” Laura snapped, then stalked off.
“Get over yourself, Laura!”
She fumed. So people wanted to take Aspen’s side once again.
Laura spotted her cousin, Xander. Just the person she wanted to see. He had the means to help
her, and all she had to do was hand him the photos. “Hey!” she called out, waving for his attention.
Once within earshot, Laura held out her phone. “I need you to make a meme for me.”
“Uh, sure,” Xander agreed. “Just send me the photo and what you want to say.”
“You’re the best!” Laura hugged him. “I’ll send it later. Can you make it for me tonight, after
the party?”
“Whatever you want,” he told her.
Good. She smiled. Laura liked getting what she wanted, especially when it came to bringing
snobby Aspen Carmichael down.
The rest of the night was so much better. People kept asking about Aspen with concern, but
Laura brushed it off.
She didn’t care. Aspen would show up later with her drama, but for now, Laura could enjoy
the party without worrying about her nemesis’s next move.
Daria drove her home at about two in the morning. Laura snuck through her window. Luckily,
no one heard her. She’d put pillows and blankets under her comforter, but she guessed no one actually
came to check on her, because they’d have figured out eventually that she’d left.
Xander sent her a text. Gonna send that picture or what?
Oh, good, so he was still up. She sent him the image and what she wanted him to say.
Xander didn’t respond for a while.
 As Laura got ready for bed, her text notification went off.
Are you sure about this?
She groaned. Him too? Why was everyone so concerned about Aspen’s tears all of a sudden?
Of course I’m sure. I need this, Xander. I just need it. Please make it for me.
Once again, he didn’t respond, but as Laura climbed under the covers and finally started
dozing off, she got a response. The one she wanted, too.
A few clicks, and Laura shared the meme where she wanted to, put her phone on silent, and
did her best to get a few hours of sleep before another hellish day of acting perfect to stay in her
father’s good graces had to begin.

*****

“I was really hoping to talk you out of posting that meme,” Xander said to Laura the next day,
his expression grim.
“Why? It’s harmless, but true. What’s the big deal?” She played nonchalant.
“Did you make her cry just to get that photo?” Xander accused.
“No! We were fighting, sure, but I don’t know what prompted it. Why do you care so much?”
Xander pointed to the photo in question. “She looks really upset. We shouldn’t have made her
pain so public.”
“It’s probably just a tantrum. No big deal. Aspen throws them all the time. What do you know
that I don’t?”
“There’s a lot of drama with her family. She’s seemed pretty upset the last few days every
time I’ve seen her.”
Laura heaved a sigh. “Don’t worry so much about it. Seriously. This is Aspen we’re talking
about.”
Xander frowned. “ No, Laura. This is wrong, and I already regret saying yes. It’s not too late
to delete it.”
“I’m not deleting it. She had too much fun humiliating me. It’s high time I paid her back,”
Laura snapped. Why was everyone on Aspen’s side?
“You know, she might have exposed you to everyone last night, but you did start it by kicking
her hula hoop,” Xander pointed out.
“Yeah? So?” Laura asked, rolling her eyes. Did he always have to be so damn logical? She
loved her cousin, really she did, but he needed to be on the right side of this never ending feud.
“And Julian says you started a rumor about a friend of his, saying he’s into guys. Not sure who
he’s talking about and whether it’s true or not, but Julian’s pretty upset about it.” Xander blew out a
breath. “I shouldn’t have made that meme. What can I do to convince you to take it down?”
“I’m pointing out the truth with her, that’s all, and so what about a rumor? If there’s no truth to
it, then it won’t matter.” Yeah, she’d said that about Ross Carter. He was a weird, quiet guy.
Something was off about him, so she’d said something. Who cared? It wasn’t a rumor really, Laura
had just stated her thoughts about him.
Damn Xander. Always had to be the guy with a conscience and who questioned her all the
time.
“I know you’ve got a lot on your plate, but come on, Laura. You’re better than this,” Xander
pleaded.
“Better than what? Aspen Carmichael? You bet I am!”
He shook his head. “This whole thing will implode on you one day, and now I’m going to be
dragged down in it. I’m not making any more memes for you. I shouldn’t have done this one. You’re
on your own from now on, Laura.”
He walked away, and Laura watched him go.
His words haunted her.
She’d always been on her own, and reality sunk in now just how much.
This wasn’t her fault. No. She wouldn’t let Xander, or anyone else, guilt her into thinking she
was the one in the wrong. It was just a stupid meme. People would forget it inevitably. They always
did, until the next juicy piece of drama or gossip popped up.
“Young lady, it’s time you come home and we deal with your attitude.”
Laura spun around slowly to face her father.
Caught, in front of plenty of people still hanging on the beach early in the morning. Some of
these parties went on all night. People would pitch tents and sleep. It was hot guys landed their dream
night with the girls.
Laura had lost her virginity a year ago just like this, in a tent with a hot guy. It was someone
she hardly talked to these days, but the sex had been good.
Alcohol bottles surrounded them.
Dad grabbed her arm roughly.
“Ow! Let go!” Laura shouted.
Someone had to hear her and help, right?
“Help! He’s hurting me!” she wailed.
“Laura Celine Feldmen! You quit that right now!” Dad jerked her forward and led the way to
their car. “You’re in a heap of trouble, and you’re going to be working this summer. You think I didn’t
know you snuck out last night and came back early in the morning? Think again. I knew it. I just didn’t
say anything to you. That’s going to change now.”
“Work? How? I can’t even drive!”
“You’ll learn to walk. It’s high time you earn your keep around here. You’re bringing down the
family name! I don’t know what’s gotten into you, but it’s going to stop now. Do you understand me?”
Her arm hurt where he gripped her. Laura knew people were laughing, pointing, and probably
taking pictures.
Xander was long gone. Most times, she could count on her cousin. This time, Laura knew
she’d probably gone too far, but she’d been pushed into this.
No matter what, Laura wasn’t the only one to blame. People would see that one day.
Somehow, she’d make sure of it.
As her father droned on about how she’d be working as a janitor at his building, she drowned
him out. Blah blah blah. Whatever.
One day, Laura would get out of here. Make her dreams a reality. Perfection wouldn’t come at
such a high cost. She just had to figure out how to achieve the goal of spreading her wings to fly.

*****
Three months later

Laura’s feet ached, she reeked of piss, and hated this summer with a passion. Finally, it had
come to an end. She’d never have to step foot into her father’s office and work as a damn janitor.
Today was her final day, and then she got to go back to school and get the hell away from here.
Xander waited for her in his car, air conditioner running. The expression on his face
concerned her.
“What’s up?”
“Wanted you to hear it from me before anyone else,” he said quietly.
“You’re acting ominous. What is it?”
“It’s about Aspen.”
She rolled her eyes. “I don’t want to hear about her. What did she do now?”
“Well, your little stunt earlier in the summer landed her with a modeling agent.”
Laura took in his words. “Wait, you’re saying something good actually happened to her
because of this?”
Not the results she’d wanted!
“Yup.” Xander watched her with caution.
“Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Because, to be honest, I’m glad something good happened to her. But I hate that she’s always
going to be known as the girl on a meme.”
He drove her home in silence. School this year would be interesting, that much was for sure.
“I just want to forget this entire summer even happened,” Laura muttered, ready to get the hell
out of Cinnamon Bay and hope for the best this school year.
 Chapter 1
Ten years later

Two pink lines.

Laura stared in shock at the pregnancy test. This wasn’t supposed to happen! Not now. Not
when she’d just gotten engaged and they hadn’t even started planning a wedding!
She squeezed her eyes shut. Yeah, as if that would take this away. Willing the results to
magically change or be wrong wouldn’t solve it, because Laura had no doubt this stupid stick wasn’t
wrong.
What would Johnson say? They’d never talked about kids. Hell, she could barely get him to
talk about the wedding, even though he’d put together a grand gesture of a proposal in Hawaii.
She covered her mouth.
Everyone would think this was a shotgun wedding, not the wedding of two people in love.
“Are we, though?” Laura asked, glancing at her distraught image in the mirror. “Are we really
in love? Or was it too fun to steal him from Aspen?”
His distance since the engagement told her what she needed to know but refused to see.
Since Johnson was still in town, she needed to tell him. He’d stand by her, right?
Laura put the stick in the bathroom vanity drawer, put herself together, and prepared for her
day.
She could do this. She had to do this.
Someone knocked on the door. Oh, good. Maybe he’d arrived already.
Laura opened it, and on the other side stood Johnson.
He stared at her, his mouth somewhat open, as if he had something to say.
“I need to tell you something,” they both spoke at the same time.
“What is it?” Laura asked.
“You first,” Johnson said, shoving his hands in his jeans pockets.
“No, you.” A bad feeling invaded her.
“Same time?” Johnson pleaded.
His eyes held a mystery, but he appeared torn by something.
Worry gnawed at her soul.
She held up one finger.
Johnson held up two.
They both put the third up at the same time.
“I’m pregnant,” she said at the same time he blurted, “I cheated on you.”
Laura reeled back, trying to take in his words. “What?”
“Pregnant?” he echoed. “It can’t be mine.”
“How dare you!” She slapped him in the face so hard, her hand stung. “How dare you for
multiple reasons! For even saying it’s not yours! For cheating on me! We’re engaged!” Laura held up
her hand with the ring on it.
Johnson buried a hand through his hair. “I don’t want to be engaged.”
His words hung over her head.
 “You … don’t want to be engaged,” she repeated. “Maybe you should have thought about that
before you proposed?”
“I was…” He hesitated.
“You what? Finish that thought,” Laura begged.
Johnson sighed. “I was trying to make Aspen jealous.”
Laura blinked, then did so again. Had she heard him right? “So, I meant nothing to you?”
“I care about you, but you’re not the kind of woman I want to spend the rest of my life with.”
“And Aspen is?” Her soul ached. Pregnant, with an engagement that meant nothing. So now
what?
“Doesn’t matter.”
“So, are we breaking up?”
Johnson sighed. “I can’t be a father, Laura. I’m not cut out for it. Never wanted kids.”
“It takes two, you know!” she shouted at him. “You took part in making a baby, so you damn
well better stick around and help!”
Without a word, Johnson backed away, walked out of the house, and shut the door.
Words didn’t need to be spoken to know this man wouldn’t be taking part in his child’s life.
That left Laura to pick up the pieces herself and become a pregnant, lonely woman. In less than nine
months, she’d have a little life depending on her.
She sunk to the floor and cried.

*****

The following January

Laura glanced up at the sound of someone approaching her room. She assumed a nurse or
Nellie were coming back, but her father stood in the doorway. “Daddy?” Hope filled her that maybe
she’d be ok after all.
He walked toward her bed, his facial expression difficult to read. “You’ve got a year, Laura.”
“A year?” She frowned. What did he mean by that? “Would you like to hold your
granddaughter?”
He waved a dismissive hand. “One year from today, on your daughter’s first birthday, I will
cut you off in every way possible if you don’t make major changes in your life.”
Her breath caught. “Wh-what do you mean?”
He held up a finger. “Get your own place. Get a job. Take care of your child. Do not get with
another man. You depend on people too much to take care of your needs. You aren’t going to be
staying with us.”
“I… Where am I going to go?”
“I’ll give you a certain allowance per month for a year, but if you’re not able to take care of
yourself, or if you are with a man before the year is up, that’s it.”
“Wait. Why can’t I date?” Not that she expected to, but these terms weren’t fair. “And how can
I work when I don’t have experience or child care?”
“That’s up to you to figure out. You need time to grow up. You wind up with men who don’t
stick around.”
 “So why am I being punished for that?”
“You’re nearly twenty-seven. You don’t have a job and never did work, aside from the
summer I made you, and now you’re a mother, abandoned by an immature man who fathered this
child. You pick the wrong boys to end up with, Laura. You have a co-dependency issue, and this is the
only way I know how to get you to look at your life and make better choices.” He turned away.
“Wait! You don’t want to see your granddaughter?”
He stopped, but didn’t turn around. “She’s a reminder of what you’ve done wrong.” With that,
her father walked out, his haunting words shattering anything left of her heart.
“I’ve made mistakes, yes,” Laura whispered to her newborn, “but I can’t believe he would
say that about you.”
She’d show him. Laura would show everyone.
A year? Fine. She’d take that year and make the best of the situation, even if she had to go it on
her own.
 Chapter 2
If today was a test, Laura flunked it. Hard. Like the lowest F she could possibly get.
Waitressing was not her forte, probably never would be, but the embarrassment of handing the wrong
plate to a customer who had a certain food allergy and had taken a bite, or spilling cold drinks in
others laps… Yeah, she sucked.
“I’m a screwup,” Laura muttered in the middle of a busy day at The Wooden Spoon, the diner
in Cinnamon Bay owned by her former nemesis. Why had she ever agreed to take the job offered to
her, knowing damn well this would happen?
Oh, right. Because she’d become a desperate single mother, alone in the world. People
showed their true colors in situations like this, some in surprising ways that were good, like Aspen.
Her own family turned their backs on her. The monthly allowance came in, which helped enough, but
taking on two jobs still had to be done.
She missed her manicures. Her massages. She couldn’t do little things like coffee runs
anymore. She had to learn to take care of herself and her daughter.
Hardest lesson ever.
“Stop it!” Aspen, said former enemy, scolded. “You’re not a screw up! Since when are you so
hard on yourself?”
Laura sunk onto the chair beside Aspen, grateful for even a brief respite of being off her
aching feet. Longing for a foot massage, a pedicure, and a cold drink, she heaved a sigh, resigned to
her new life. “Oh, I don’t know. Since I started screwing up?” She side eyed Aspen, fearing the
worst. “Am I getting fired now?”
“Are you kidding me? So you mixed up two meals. I don’t consider that worthy of firing.”
“I gave the wrong one to a person with a food allergy!” Laura exclaimed. “Luckily Xander
was nearby and managed to help get the piece of food out before the man choked to death!”
Aspen frowned. “Laura…”
“This is it, isn’t it? Are you firing me?” Her heart raced, and she willed herself not to cry.
Laura thought after having her daughter, that the tears and crying tantrums from pregnancy hormones
would fade. No such luck. What was up with that?
“Do you want me to?”
She stared at her former enemy. “No, but I don’t want you to take pity on me, either.” Pity from
Aspen, let alone anyone else, was the last thing she wanted, but pretty much assumed she got.
Aspen stretched out her legs in the chair beside her. “What if it’s not pity? What if it’s
empathy? Me, holding out the olive branch for us to continue to put the past behind us and become
friends?”
Laura blew out a breath and tried to calm down. “I’ve never been this nervous or anxious.
Never. And having you see this side of me kills me inside.”
“We all have nerves and anxiety. It comes out sooner or later. You’ve seen me fail many
times.”
Aspen left out the part of how Laura had constantly thrown it in her face, which was awfully
nice of her not to retaliate.
“I’m almost twenty-seven and dealing with my first job. Two jobs, because there’s the
bookstore,” Laura muttered, “and being a mom!”
 Venting to Aspen felt foreign and strange, but what helped was that Aspen allowed her to do
it. She genuinely listened to her. Aspen, the woman who’d loathed her for years, but to be fair, Laura
knew damn well she started it. Crazy thing was that when talking to Aspen a year ago, neither could
remember what the hell began their lifelong feud. It had simply existed.
“Just make sure I’m never in your YouTube videos, because I don’t need the world to see my
shortcomings.” Part of what made Laura nervous was the amount of attention Aspen had online. She’d
warned everyone that there would be recordings going for her channel, and yeah, they could opt out of
being part of the videos, but Laura always worried that somehow a screw up she made would
accidentally wind up on camera.
“Ok! It’s pep talk time.” Aspen clapped her hands together. “You’ve got to stop this self-
sabotaging talk, Laura.”
She grabbed her water bottle from beside her, uncapped it, and took a few sips. “I know. I’m a
mess.”
“Nellie says motherhood does that to a person,” Aspen reminded her gently. “Plus, you’re
adjusting to so many things at once. I’m not firing you, but if you feel this job is too much for you, I’m
not going to be upset if you need to quit.”
She almost retorted ‘that’s what you want, isn’t it?’ but refrained from doing so, beginning the
process of learning not to be so negative or accusing.
“I’m not a quitter.” Laura squared her shoulders. “I’m here until you boot me out.”
Aspen pointed to her bootless feet. “As you can see, no boots, so you’re stuck with me. Need
a few minutes more?”
“Yeah. Don’t leave, unless you have a pressing matter.” Laura practically begged.
“I’ll sit with you a little longer,” Aspen promised.
Laura pretended to be busy with her phone. She started scrolling through photos of Harriet,
now four months old. Her smiles were always worth the sleepless, stressful nights. Baby giggles and
snuggles. They always outweighed the critics. People who used to beg to be in her top friends lists
now looked down on her: laughing, teasing, and talking crap.
Oh, how the mighty had fallen.
Then she logged onto Instagram and knew right away she needed to take her ex off of her
follow list.
Yeah, she said that every damn time.
Still, he remained, as if spying would give her any insight. Honestly, it surprised her that he
hadn’t taken her off. Probably because he wanted a chance to flaunt his new girl in her face.
“What drew you to him in the first place?” Laura blurted, not realizing right away that she
hadn’t explained more to Aspen before asking that out loud.
“Hmm?”
She handed her phone over. “Johnson. Look at him.”
“Flaunting. How typical.” Aspen made a face and handed her the phone back.
It hit her then how he must have flaunted her in front of Aspen all the time, especially
considering his comment when he admitted he cheated the day she told him about her pregnancy. “So
that’s what it feels like,” she muttered.
Aspen pulled her wavy blonde locks up into a clip. “Yeah, pretty much.”
“I tell myself every time to take him off. I don’t need to see this. For some reason, I can’t.”
“I’ll do the honors for you. Trust me, it feels good to ignore him. By keeping him on, it shows
him that you’re still interested. He’ll use it to his advantage.”
 Laura gave her the phone. “Do it, please.”
Aspen pushed a few buttons, then grinned. “There. Done. He’s gone. You won’t have to see
his nastiness. Don’t start following him again, though. No one step forward, two steps back.”
“I know, I know.” Laura sighed, dropping her phone back into her purse. “I just hoped he’d at
least be a little interested in Harriet.”
That hurt the most. Her little girl, a life they created, and Johnson wanted no part of her life.
Laura would have to raise her on her own, but it was better than fighting for a man to be part of his
child’s life when he obviously had zero interest.
Things she wished she’d known before gloating about how she’d stolen him right from under
Aspen’s nose.
Johnson made her feel special for a while, until his true colors showed. She’d never known
until speaking to Aspen about him that he always showed off to every girl he dated. Part of her
wanted to warn the new chick, but no. Let her find out for herself. Right now it would only backfire,
so no need to draw more attention to herself.
“He told me the day he admitted he cheated on me that he never wanted to be engaged,” Laura
told Aspen.
“So why did he ask you?” Aspen grunted.
“He said he wanted to make you jealous.”
Aspen’s jaw dropped. “That’s so stupid! I was already long over him!”
“Who knows with his thinking.”
“I’m so sorry, Laura. That’s horrible.”
She shrugged. “I guess it is what it is, but that was the reason I hated it so much when you
were spending time with Xander. It all got to me.”
“I can understand that. He’ll get what’s coming to him one day,” Aspen swore.
Laura sure as hell hoped so. He needed a taste of his own medicine.
“I think I’m ready to go back out there again,” she finally spoke.
Aspen stood, then brushed off her black pants. “Then let’s get to it. You’ve got this. Hey,
maybe we should get Nellie one night later this week and go out.”
“I’d like that a lot,” Laura said softly, “but I don’t want to rely on my aunt and uncle to watch
Harriet all the time.”
“What about Xander? You know he adores her.”
Yeah, her cousin did adore children, even hers, and was damn good with her.
“Again with the relying, but I can’t deny how good a night out sounds,” Laura admitted.
“I’ll ask him.” Aspen spun on her heel. “Gotta get to the kitchen. Let me know if you need
anything.”
She needed plenty, but Laura remained silent once again.

*****

Cooper Dawson stepped into Bushel & a Peck, the local grocery store in Cinnamon Bay,
longing for a few things. He’d gotten in later than anticipated, so his other stops would have to wait
until morning. Tonight, he’d feast for one in his rental cottage.
What a quaint and quirky little town. He’d heard of Cinnamon Bay often, especially about the
legend of the Café Amour and their famed special spice that made people fall in love. He’d always
wanted to get out here, and now he had the opportunity. He’d been granted a whole month out here,
and he couldn’t wait to explore this touristy town.
Most of this trip would be a vacation, and yeah, he could use it.
Meandering through the store, Cooper took in the small town appeal. People stopped to talk to
one another, saying hello, hugging, and squealing over news. He’d visited so many small towns and
loved that. His high rise apartment in New York City might have amazing views, but nothing beat the
small town vibes.
A loud crash startled him, and he whirled around as a young woman holding a baby screamed
and jumped back from the falling cans. Her diaper bag fell to the floor, and people were pointing and
whispering instead of helping.
The woman’s blue eyes were wide and full of embarrassment. She must have been the one to
knock it over.
Her baby screamed at the top of her lungs.
Cooper marched over and approached the shaken woman. “Hi. Let me help you,” he suggested
gently. What better way to be more talkative and fit into society than to help a woman who seemed to
be flustered? He only hoped that his quirkiness wouldn’t show too much, but he had to learn to ignore
the anxious part of him that worried about that all the time.
She simply nodded and held tight to her child. “I… I swear, I’ve never been this clumsy in my
life!”
All eyes were on them. Cooper lost his cool. “Y’all can either help or stop staring! What’s
wrong with you?” An angry outburst from him, but people sucked sometimes!
People always did that, no matter where or what situation. Nothing agitated him more than
that. Cooper didn’t take too kindly to losing his cool, but a crowd of spectators instead of helpers
pushed his buttons.
He’d been there.
Laughed at. Picked on. Watched.
“It’s my karma,” the woman whispered. “I was a bully, and now that I’m alone…” she
stopped speaking quickly.
“I don’t care what you were. You don’t deserve humiliation.” Cooper bent to pick up some of
the cans.
Several people donning nametags moved in and began picking up the cans. “Thank you, sir,”
one man said to him. “We’ve got it from here.”
Cooper stood and held out his hand to the still upset woman. “I’m Cooper.”
“Laura.” She managed to shake his hand. Her little one still screamed her head off.
“Hey, little one. What’s your name?” Cooper made kissy sounds at the little girl, and to his
surprise, she stopped wailing to look at him.
“Hey, she likes you!” Laura said, smiling for the first time and wow. What a beauty.
He stole a glance at her left hand. No ring.
“I, uh, better get the baby formula I needed before she screams of hunger again,” Laura said.
“Thanks for coming to my rescue.”
She hurried away before he could say anything, and Cooper stared after her, wondering her
story. He was a people watcher, and Laura intrigued him.
Bah. He didn’t have time to think about a pretty woman with no wedding ring on her finger
carrying a screaming baby. Cooper could barely tolerate dealing with people as it was. No way could
he handle anything else.
 Chapter 3
Why oh why did Laura have to end up being next door neighbors with Julian Rouche? It
wasn’t an issue of Julian being a bad guy. Quite the opposite, actually. The problem with living next
door to Julian was that he’d been one of her victims years ago. Laura had relentlessly picked on him
for … she couldn’t even recall what, to be honest. A friend of Xander’s and also a friend of Ross,
Nellie’s boyfriend, he’d been an easy target. Now he got the biggest inside peek at all of her
shortcomings, and that sucked.
He sat out on his porch, a beer in hand, when she pulled up into her driveway. Harriet began
her wailing again in the backseat. So, the pacifier didn’t pacify tonight. Great. Another person got to
watch her suck as a parent.
As she got out of the car and unbuckled Harriet from the carseat, he set his bottle down and
sauntered over. “Need help?”
“Not from you,” Laura snapped, taking note of the three grocery bags and diaper bag still
remaining in the car.
Julian shrugged. “All right. Offer’s there if you want it.”
And just stood there. Watching.
She grunted and carried her daughter up the two steps to her porch, then fumbled in her pocket
for the keys that were still in the damn ignition.
Meanwhile, Harriet’s cries could wake the dead.
She wanted to cry and scream herself.
“Here, let me,” Julian said softly, moving around her with her keys, grocery bags, and diaper
bag in hand.
“Thank you.” Resigned to her fate, she couldn’t deny his help.
Once inside, Julian laid the bags down on the table, and Laura set Harriet up in her swing,
hoping the motion would soothe her as it usually did.
It worked. Phew.
Bottle. Time to make a bottle. She scratched her head, trying to pull herself together. What did
she need to do? Oh yeah. Feed Harriet. Stuff on the table. Bottle in the bag.
Aching feet and all, Laura headed there, ignoring Julian’s gaze. “You can go. Thanks again,”
she told him.
“You look frazzled and tired. I’m right next door if you need anything. It won’t hurt to ask for
the help you obviously need.” Julian’s words weren’t crude, but why the hell did they make her want
to cry?
Laura stood there, staring at all of the bags, her back to Julian.
Julian. One of the many people she’d been a bitch to.
They hadn’t gotten along, and now here he was, living next door to her, watching her
constantly fall apart.
“Laura,” he said gently, spinning her around to face him.
“What do you want?” Her shoulders slumped. “Like everyone else, you’re here to watch me
fail? Watch the calm and collected Laura Feldmen become a shell of herself because she can’t even
keep a man around when she gets pregnant?” Her body wracked with shudders and fatigue, yet she
willed herself not to break down.
 “Not everyone thinks this is your karma. You have yourself believing that,” Julian said. “I’m
not here for anything other than to help you. I can see your struggle daily, and yet you refuse to let
anyone in. When you do, you lash out to protect yourself.”
“I don’t need you. I don’t need anyone!” Laura screeched.
“I think you do, and you’re afraid to admit it. Raising a kid alone isn’t easy. You’ve got people
who are willing to help. You just need to let them in.”
“What are you, Mr. Perfect all of a sudden? What do you know?”
“Not much about this, but doesn’t mean I can’t see you’re hurting.”
“Remind me to keep my damn blinds down,” Laura snapped.
Aaaaaaand once again, Harriet cried. The kid was like a ticking time bomb. The anxiety and
struggle were real. Laura hated it when her daughter cried in public, even though that was what
babies did.
Somehow, it felt like it rested on her shoulders that she couldn’t keep her kid from crying.
She’d gotten the talks from Nellie, who had two kids and was now pregnant with her third, but
the nasty, nagging voices in her head told her otherwise.
She didn’t have her mother to call and rely on. She didn’t have her father’s money to bail her
out. Laura Feldmen was truly alone, and she hated how everyone in Cinnamon Bay saw and realized
that.
Julian turned to go. As he stood at her door, he spun back around. “Push away all you want,
but know that I’ll be here if you need it. Maybe if you learned to stop with your defenses, you’ll see
that people care.”
Then he walked out and closed the door behind him.

*****

Cooper walked into Brewed With a View the next morning and took in the sights. Place was
hopping for sure. Apparently one of the hot spots in town, this was the place to be.
Three pairs of busybody eyes followed him from the moment he walked in to his journey
toward the line. They pointed and whispered to each other, and Cooper had a feeling he’d become the
town gossip sooner rather than later.
He shouldn’t be recognized, but soon, Cinnamon Bay would know who he was and why he’d
come, or at least they’d take a wild guess, but he would be long gone by then.
A burst of laughter caught his attention, and he glanced in that direction.
The woman, Laura, from last night, sat at a table with two women and a man.
She didn’t have the baby with her.
Unlike last night, she looked so much more at ease. Crinkles formed around her eyes when she
smiled, but the moment she turned her head and met his gaze, he noted the unease in her eyes.
What would it be like? To sit with friends with ease. Laugh. Talk. Not worry about making a
mess of things. To hold conversations that were fun, serious, and in between?
Something he’d never experienced.
Something he longed to experience.
Isolation had always been his constant.
Cooper craved so much more, but had no idea how to begin finding it.
 He should have stayed in line, put in his order, and left it at that.
That didn’t happen.
Cooper’s feet refused to listen to his brain, and before he knew it, he stood before their table.
“Hi again.” Wow, this was quite bold for him, but she intrigued him in ways Cooper couldn’t easily
explain.
Laura smiled shyly. “Good morning.”
Her three friends watched their interaction with interest. People watching made him too damn
nervous.
“And who is this?” the man asked.
“This is Cooper. I umm, met him last night at the grocery store,” Laura said. “Cooper, my
cousins Nellie and Xander, and Xander’s fiancée, Aspen.”
He knew of the name Aspen, but Cooper didn’t set his gaze on her too long. He most definitely
didn’t want her to know of his identity, and so he needed to play it cool. She’d probably never figure
it out, but nerves came into play anyway. “Nice to meet you all.”
“You’re new in town? Or passing by?” Xander asked.
“Just visiting,” Cooper said nonchalantly. So many places to visit, so little time. Anything to
put good visions and memories in his mind. Anything to forget the past. The small house he’d grown
up in with his mother and the man he was to call Dad.
His stomach clenched. No, damn it, don’t think about them.
Calming tactics. Cooper needed to pull himself from those thoughts. He had a new life. One
where he could travel. One where he could see everything. Experience everything.
Four faces watched him with concern.
“I’m sorry, did you say something?” he asked, his tone quiet.
“Would you care to join us?” Laura asked.
“Uh, yeah. Sure. Thanks!” He pulled up a seat next to Laura.
“Uh oh. Cooper’s on their radar,” Xander quipped.
“Radar?” he asked. “Whose radar? And why am I on it?” There it came again. The constant
leg bouncing brought on by anxiety.
“We call them the Trio of Trouble,” Aspen whispered with a giggle. “The town Matchmakers,
and they’re headed this way with goodies.”
“Helloooo!” one of the women called. She resembled Mrs. Claus to the point it became eerie.
“We haven’t seen you here before!”
The three who’d been watching him from the moment he walked in. Yep, he’d sensed trouble
from the start.
“Welcome to Cinnamon Bay.” Another woman, donning a beret, handed him a foam cup, then
placed one in front of Laura. “On us.”
“Are you trying to make us fall in love?” Laura asked.
Cooper reeled back. “Uh, what?” Why would she ask such a thing?
She pointed to his drink, then hers. “Café Amour.”
Ah yes, the famed love spice drink. Duh. That had to be it.
“I’m not afraid if you aren’t,” he challenged.
“I don’t believe in the legend. Sorry ladies,” Laura said with a shrug. She held her cup up.
“Cheers?”
Sure, why not? He tapped his cup to hers, then took a sip.
Good taste, actually. Yum.
 “Well, have a good day!”
Just like that, they were off.
“So are they always like that?” Cooper asked.
“Oh yes, and you two just became their next unwilling participants,” Nellie informed him.
“Nells, we’d better go,” Xander said.
“Right, well, see you later!” She gathered her stuff.
Aspen stood, too. “Gotta get to the diner. Have a good day!”
“Was it something I said?” Cooper quipped. Part of him genuinely thought he’d done
something, but the comment really did come out as joking. This time, anyway.
Laura chuckled. “No, it was more something you drank. Do you feel any differently yet?”
He tilted his head. “Am I supposed to?” So people really believed in this? What the hell was
in the drink, anyway?
“Probably not. I’ve never had one of these before. They do taste good!” Laura took another
sip.
“So, where’s that cute little girl of yours this morning?” A good subject: adorable babies.
Something else he had no experience with, but that little one last night didn’t seem to mind his
awkwardness.
“With my aunt. They watch her while I work. I have two jobs.”
“Two jobs, huh?” He wanted to know so much more. Like, was she single? Where was the
father of her little girl? But yeah, he wasn’t about to ask those questions to a total stranger. He wasn’t
event sure what gravitated him toward the table this morning, but it beat sitting alone and thinking.
“Yeah.” Laura shifted her gaze downward. “Anyway, what brings you to town?”
“I travel a lot for work,” he replied simply. “It gives me a chance to explore so many towns,
so it’s partially a vacation, too.”
“Speaking of work, I’ve got to get to mine,” she grunted, then stole a quick glance at him.
Curiosity filled those baby blues of hers. “Maybe I’ll see you around?”
He’d like that a lot, actually. “What would you say if I ask you to show me around Cinnamon
Bay?” His therapist would be proud of him right now. Cooper couldn’t wait to tell her his progress
today, but damn it if the jitters didn’t slam him over this.
“I’d say yes, if you actually asked,” she replied.
“Then I’m officially asking. Can we get together again and you give me the guided tour of this
tourist town?” It didn’t hurt to have someone to talk to while here. He wouldn’t stay long, but no
reason not to enjoy someone’s company while he did so. He had a lot of practice to become a better
communicator and more sociable.
“Yeah, I’d like that,” Laura said softly.
They exchanged numbers, then Cooper watched her leave. More and more, he wanted
something long term. Someone to come home to. Someone to create plans and dreams with.
It would never be. He wore too many scars and carried too much baggage, but he would still
enjoy her company.
That’s all it would be.
 Chapter 4
Laura would never get used to the idea of feeling like a failure.
She hated failing!
Always the competitive one, this shook her to the core.
Beaten down by a damn waitressing job? Unheard of!
Except for now.
Today had been another brutal day so far. No dish dropping or spilling hot drinks in patrons’
laps, but she was too slow, too sloppy, and too caught up in her anxiety to do this job justice.
She wanted to quit. Oh, how she wanted to up and run away, never showing her face again, but
her pride wouldn’t allow it.
She would not quit the job Aspen gave to her. She wouldn’t allow herself to fail like this.
All of those years feeling like she could never measure up because of her father’s ridiculously
high expectations took a toll on her, especially now.
“Maybe I should learn to cook?” she said out loud to Aspen, who’d walked out from the
kitchen the moment Laura took her break.
Aspen’s eyes went wide.
“You don’t want me in your kitchen.” Laura deflated, assuming Aspen’s response meant a big,
fat, hell no.
“No! I mean, no, that’s not the reason I got that look. I’m just shocked. You don’t cook much?”
“Never had a reason to,” Laura muttered. “Having a cook and all.”
Then it hit her that duh, Aspen had a ‘cook and all’, but that’s who she’d learned her skills
from.
“If this is too much for you, we can find something that works better,” Aspen said softly.
Fury bubbled up within before she could control it. “I’m learning, ok? I don’t need you to be
condescending!”
Heads turned at her loud, angry voice.
Aspen shut her mouth, and a frown stretched across her face. She appeared ready to bolt.
“God, I’m sorry, Aspen. I don’t do well with being crappy at everything. I hate this.” Laura
palmed her head in her hands.
“I used to feel crappy at everything,” Aspen admitted.
This caught her attention. “But you weren’t!”
“I never felt that I wasn’t, and I always assumed you believed I was the worst.”
Hearing the words from Aspen tore at Laura’s heart. She’d never once put too much thought
into how Aspen felt, especially in their younger years, when the feuding was at its worst.
“Don’t look at me like it should surprise you!” Aspen exclaimed with a nervous chuckle.
“But you like … excelled at so much without any effort!” Laura gawked at her. “I hated that
about you. It’s like you never had to work for it.”
“Really? Did me hiding my inability to read not tell you anything?” Aspen asked, a slight
bitter edge to her voice. “I hide stuff really well when I want to.”
“Touché,” Laura mumbled, thinking on it.
“Most things that people say I’m successful for are because I needed an escape. I never felt I
was more deserving of it than anyone else. It helped me get away from my family, my painful past,
and my secrets,” Aspen explained. “Xander was the one who helped see the real me. I don’t hide my
faults now. If people can’t accept me for who I am, then that’s on them.”
“His high confidence has worn off on you, “ Laura said with a laugh. “Xander’s so
indestructible. Nothing gets him down.” She’d always admired that about her cousin, which caused
her to act out more toward him. Aspen, too. The more jealousy she held toward people, the more she
wanted to tear them down.
“Oh, plenty gets him down, but he gets back up again.” Aspen checked her watch. “I gotta get
back in, but if you’re interested in cooking, we’ll help you.”
“I make a pretty good bottle for a baby,” Laura offered up, and they both laughed. “You could
always start a cooking class. Even put it on your channel.”
“Just as long as you’re not in the video, right?” Aspen grinned. “See, I listen to you.”
“Yeah, you do, and I appreciate it, all things considered.” Laura stood, not keen on the idea of
being on her aching feet again, but she had a job to do, and would give it her best.
Always with a smile.
“Hey, Aspen?” Laura called.
She turned back around.
“The day that I took that photo of you, I was embarrassed because my father wouldn’t allow
me to get my driver’s license because I had a few B’s on my report card. I felt like I wasn’t good
enough, and everyone else, including you, was getting theirs or had theirs.”
Aspen’s eyes widened. “I’m sorry. And here I was upset because my parents refused to
acknowledge I needed help and had to cheat my way through a passing grade.”
“We’re a lot a like, with family drama and stuff,” Laura said quietly.
“Yeah, we are, and it’s affected us in different ways. So remember when you’re feeling your
lowest, that I’ve been there. I do understand.” Aspen stepped closer and wrapped her in a hug.
“I’ll try not to lash out when I’m upset. I know you’re doing your best and giving me so many
chances,” Laura whispered, then moved away from Aspen. “Thank you. I appreciate it, even if I don’t
always show it.”

*****

The Wooden Spoon. Here it was.

Cooper stood in front of the building and snapped a few photos. No one would know the
wiser, just people assuming this tourist wanted photos of everything.
He liked the exterior. Fit right along with the town.
Today, this would be his first stop. He wished he hadn’t run into the owner with Laura this
morning, but oh well. Not like anyone knew who he was, and he always wrote under a pseudonym.
He would continue to do so with this potential step up to the position he’d always wanted.
Today marked the first day of this opportunity.
Cooper pulled open the door.
“Welcome to the Wooden Spoon! Please seat yourself.”
That beautiful, sultry voice sounded familiar. Way too familiar.
Panic hit him. So, this must be one of Laura’s two jobs.
Ok, no need to fret. She didn’t know who he was, and he’d already said he was here for work.
People who worked had to eat.
She’d never catch on.
“Cooper!” she exclaimed. “Fancy meeting you here.”
“I’m hungry,” he declared, “and people have been talking about the grand reopening, so here I
am.”
“Yeah, the previous owners retired and sold the place, so Aspen, whom you met this morning,
partnered up with her friend to run the place.”
He knew all of this. He’d had this planned for a few months. Many knew of Aspen through her
YouTube channels. She’s also a model and pretty popular on social media due to some meme that
started out her career.
He hoped to be the first major restaurant critic to write up his review about The Wooden
Spoon, and maybe get some more insight about Aspen and how she was doing after overcoming some
obstacles. Stories about the owners always went over well with readers, especially with a unique
past like Aspen’s.
All the while remaining anonymous.
He’d venture over to other restaurants in Cinnamon Bay, but he wouldn’t dare publish other
reviews so close together. Not if he wanted to keep his cover.
He shouldn’t, but he asked, “So where does one sit if he wants to be served by a pretty lady
by the name of Laura?”
Overkill? He’d seen this kind of flirting in movies, and if Cooper could do one thing, it was
remember certain characters and their personalities, then try to recreate it. Would it work?
A blush crept up in her cheeks. “Right over in these seats,” she gestured, “and I’ll be with you
shortly.”
He gave her a nod and headed over to a booth in the corner. While Laura scurried off to assist
someone else, he took out his phone and snapped several different shots, all the while watching for
Aspen or anyone else who might be around.
Laura appeared with a menu and pad in hand. “So what can I get you to drink?”
“Are there any more things with the…” He pretended to look around, then cupped his hands
over his mouth and whispered, “love spice in it?”
She giggled. “Not here, but I wouldn’t be surprised if the Trio tries to beg Aspen or
Bernadette to put something on the menu. So far, it’s only Brewed With a View who carries items
with the love spice, unless it’s been made and given to someone by the trio.”
“So people really come here for that legend?”
Laura nodded. “Oh yeah. It’s what Cinnamon Bay is famous for.”
“Interesting. Very interesting.” He would study the menu more closely when she walked off,
but the conversation with her gave him something to look forward to. However, dread filled him at
having to write this review. Knowing Laura worked here and she had some kind of friendship with
Aspen, the co-owner, didn’t sit well with him.
Still, all in a day’s work. She’d never know.
“Tell me some of the best drinks and why,” Cooper pleaded with Laura.
“If you’re into smoothies, they’re simply to die for. I love them!” She became enthusiastic as
she talked about each one and how Aspen made them. “I so want her to give me an insight on the
kitchen. She’s a beast in there. Totally in her element.”
“I heard my name!” Aspen called, walking over toward them. “Oh! Hi. I remember you from
this morning,” she said with a smile. “Welcome.”
 “I’ve been chatting with your very kind hostess here,” he said in response. “She’s been talking
up your smoothies.”
“Oh, yes.” Aspen licked her lips. “Now I’m craving one,” she said with a laugh.
A loud crash caught everyone’s attention, then a yell. “Aspeeeeeen!”
“Oh, that doesn’t sound good.” Aspen darted off toward the kitchen.
Laura made a face. “I hope Bernadette didn’t hurt herself.”
“I’ll take the Fruit Smoothie,” Cooper told her. “I’d like to look over the menu some more.
You know what? Also bring me a coffee and a water.”
“Got it.” Laura smiled at him again, her blue eyes lighting up. “I’ll be right back.”
Once alone, Cooper took photos of sections of the menu. Even for a diner, some of the
selections were unique and had a different flair.
Hmm, what to choose.
“Here you-Oof!”
Before he could look up, scalding hot liquid fell onto his lap. “Shit!” Cooper cursed.
Laura quickly set down the glass of water and the smoothie. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry!”
He shot out of the seat and rushed toward the bathroom. Damn, that burned!
Cooper walked out of the bathroom a few minutes later just as Laura rushed toward the
women’s. She plowed right into him.
“Whoa,” he said, steadying her.
Her face flushed, expression crestfallen, she struggled to move away. “God, Cooper. I’m a
terrible hostess.”
“Hey, accidents happen.” Painful ones, but yeah, they did.
Some critics slam hostesses who are uncoordinated and sloppy. His mentor sure would.
Cooper learned so much from him, but … no. He couldn’t do that to her. Laura had the uncoordinated
down, but Cooper felt for her. She obviously struggled.
She peered up at him from beneath thick, wet eyelashes. “How bad are you burned?”
“I’ll survive. I promise,” he assured her, keeping his hands on her shoulders. Cooper wanted
to push her stray, loose strands of hair from her face, but dared not move.
She smelled of fruit and damn, did it ever affect his senses and train of thought.
His libido surged to life, and Cooper hated to admit, even to himself, that he didn’t know how
to handle this situation.
At all.
He’d never felt this. Not the way he did now.
“I need to let you move,” he said softly. “You were headed toward the bathroom.”
“Only to break down and cry where no one can see me.” She sniffed. “I’ve been all sorts of
out of my element ever since I wound up pregnant. I thought the hormones would calm down once I
gave birth, and oh my gosh, this is probably too much information for you.”
He chuckled. “As long as you don’t tell me word for word how birthing your daughter went,
we’re fine.”
A laugh blew past her lips.
“There ya go. A laugh. I like that.” Cooper ignored his good senses and finally tucked that
lock of golden blonde hair behind her ear.
Her lips parted.
Blue eyes settled on him, awe and intrigue filling them.
His heart pounded against his rib cage. A rush of feeling flowed through him.
 What was happening here?
“I, umm, set your new coffee down at your table. I figure I’d do so while you were safe from
me.”
Cooper laughed. “Thank you. Don’t hide from me. I’d still like to see your smiling face while
I place my order.”
“You’re being way too nice to me,” she said, swiping her face, then stepped back.
Disappointment shot through him at her moving away. Cooper went to his table and sipped his
smoothie as he continued to study the menu.
She reminded him of himself in many ways, which intrigued Cooper so much more.
 Chapter 5
Now or never. Laura couldn’t avoid his table forever.
She slowly approached.
“There you are!” Cooper’s smile stole a piece of her heart. “Come out of hiding just for me?”
She grunted. “Must you tease? I’m utterly mortified!”
Laura used to laugh at others’ humiliations, but now she begged the universe for nobody to see
her own. What had she become?
Aspen passed by, heading toward the storage room, and flashed a thumbs up with a smile.
Laura couldn’t believe how much of a great help Aspen had been to her. She could have easily
laughed at all of her misfortune, but no. Aspen tried her best to lift her up when her spirits plummeted.
She owed a lot to this woman.
“So, what are you having?” Laura clicked her lucky pen and waited for a response.
“I’ll have the beef stroganoff with a side salad, and asparagus as the vegetable.”
“Great choice. I’ll go put that in for you right now.”
“Thanks!”
She turned to walk away.
“Hey, Laura?”
“Yeah?” Laura spun around.
“One more request.” Cooper’s lips curved up.
“What’s that?”
“I request that you don’t beat yourself up over an accident.”
Her pulse spiked. This man. He surprised her every time he opened his mouth to speak.
“I’ll do my best to honor that one,” she replied, then walked off to greet the new patrons
several booths over.
What luck. Her neighbor, Julian, and Ross Carter, Nellie’s boyfriend.
“Hey. You two on lunch and came all the way out here?” The two were training in
Summerfield to become EMTs.
“We’re done for the day,” Ross explained.
“We’re here!” Xander, followed by Nellie, rushed to the booth. “Hey, Laura.”
She nodded a hello at them as Nellie slid in next to Ross, who immediately slipped an arm
around her shoulders.
“Where’s my girl?” Xander asked, searching for Aspen.
“Back there.” Laura pointed to the direction she’d last seen her go. “Bernadette had some
issues. Aspen’s running around like crazy trying to sort things out.”
“Hmm. Maybe I should go back and check on her,” Xander said, then stood to go. “I’ll be
back.”
“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!” Julian called after him.
Xander stopped and flipped him off. “Problem with that. There’s not much you wouldn’t do.”
“Oh. Right.” Julian grinned.
Xander took off.
Julian’s gaze landed on Laura. “You doing ok?” he asked softly.
She didn’t want Nellie or Ross to know anything, so she snapped. “Of course I am. That’s a
stupid question.”
Damn it. She cursed herself as she walked off. This was what she didn’t want: attention on her
that embarrassed her to the point of lashing out. Exactly what she told Aspen she would try not to do.
So much for that.

*****

Cooper sent Laura a text at five, asking if she was free so she could show him around
Cinnamon Bay. He’d left her a big tip earlier and had a feeling she’d probably tell him it was too
much, but she deserved it.
He’d mulled over the review he needed to write all day.
The Wooden Spoon needed some work, and while he’d never worried about what to write
before, for some reason, this one, as much as it needed to be done, loomed over him like a heavy
weight. Seeing Xander walk back to the kitchen like he worked there, Cooper knew his mentor would
have a field day with slamming that situation.
He should never have sat with Laura and her friends this morning. Watching as Aspen took her
under her wing warmed his heart.
Cooper often followed his mentor’s advice, but this time, as much as he knew he could say a
lot about the place, his heart wasn’t in it. He knew too much backstory. Invested himself in someone
whom he’d never see again after he left.
Why’d he let himself get so interested in a young woman who seemed to feel out of place,
something Cooper knew so much about?
Laura responded almost right away.
I can’t tonight. My daughter’s extra fussy. I’m not sure what’s wrong.
Cooper should have left it at that, but again, he didn’t.
Do you want company?
Why had he asked that? Sounded too forward. Too wrong. Too messed up.
Are you offering? Because I’m inclined to accept, but I have to warn you. I’m not handling
things well.
Her warnings didn’t scare him off.
Then she sent another text. Are you good with kids?
Was he? Cooper hadn’t really had the opportunity. Isolated and alone, he hadn’t ever managed
to become a people person.
Even with his travels, the charisma was forced. He’d learned from other food critics. Cooper
could mimic well, but how did he be himself? No one would want that.
Until Laura, he’d never put his full heart into it. Never cared beyond it all being part of the
job.
I can be, he replied back.
Or so Cooper hoped.
She responded with her address.
He had an address!
That’s when the anxiety hit, so before leaving, Cooper made an important call.
The familiar voice soothed him when she answered. “Cooper! How are you?”
 “I need you to give me a pep talk,” he begged.
“You know it. What’s going on?”
“Anxiety. I’m about to go over to a woman’s house.”
“Oooh… I like this. Tell me about her.”
“Her name is Laura. She’s a woman I met here in Cinnamon Bay. A single mom who seems
out of her element. I can’t stop running into her or thinking about her.”
“Laura, huh? And a single mom. Interesting.”
“She was supposed to give me a tour of the town, but her baby isn’t feeling well. I … kinda
said I’d come hang out with her. What was I thinking?” He squeezed his eyes shut.
“Coop,” Jana said softly, “you’ve got this. You’re starting to interact more with people. This
is good.”
“Is it?” He scratched at his scruff. He needed a shave.
“It is. You’ve come so far since you were found.”
“You were the right person to call. I don’t know that I’m good with babies. They’re small and
kinda scary.”
“She’s right there with you. Just be yourself.”
“I’m not sure myself is good,” he muttered.
“Cooper, if she’s been talking to you, you must have caught her interest. She’s letting you into
her home where she lives with her baby. That’s a huge thing, you know.”
“I should go,” he told her.
“Yes, you should. Have a good time, and don’t worry so much. Let me know how it goes?”
“Ok,” he agreed. “Thanks for listening.”
“It’s what I do, and you know you can call or chat with me anytime.” The same reminder
every time.
“I appreciate it.”
They hung up, and Cooper glanced at his reflection in the mirror. “Here we go. You’re just
hanging out.”
Nothing to worry about.
 Chapter 6
Every five minutes, Laura peered out the window.
Why waiting for a man she barely knew to come over drove her to distraction, she’d never
know. Harriet kept fussing, but at least, for now, she’d calmed down somewhat.
Next door, Julian stepped outside just as Xander and Ross walked up his drive. Must be
having a guy’s night.
That’s when an unfamiliar car pulled up to the curb. Out stepped Cooper, then the driver of the
vehicle drove away.
He stopped and turned his head, so Laura guessed one of the guys must be talking to him.
Probably Xander, since he’d been at the table with them this morning.
Great. So she’d be the talk of the town. At least this time, for different reasons.
Laura opened the door. “Hi! You made it.”
He held out a bouquet of daisies. “For you.”
Touched, Laura took them from him and sniffed. “Thank you. That was sweet.”
“Well, you’ve had a rough day. Thought it might make you feel better.” He gave her a small,
hopeful grin.
“You thought right. I appreciate it.” She set the vase down on the table by the front door.
Cooper stood rigid, and his expression couldn’t be easily read.
“Are you … ok?” she asked tentatively.
“Uh, yeah.” Cooper seemed to shake himself out of it. Whatever ‘it’ was.
Harriet cooed at them. She finally seemed content. Go figure, the moment someone else
stepped into the house, she’d become a calm and happy baby, making Laura look like a liar.
“She’s smiling. Look at that.” Cooper knelt in front of Harriet’s swing and held out a finger,
which her daughter promptly pulled on.
Cooper made a funny noise the moment she did so.
Giggles filled the air.
Laura stood behind them, completely mesmerized. “You made her laugh. Look at that,” she
mused softly, loving the moment. Harriet didn’t do that with her. Maybe babies really did sense
tension, so Laura’s fear and anxiety might be the reason her daughter always seemed to be easily set
off.
Ignoring the nagging voices in her head telling her she couldn’t make her own child happy,
Laura knelt beside them, watching as Harriet’s smile grew, and the laughter snared a piece of her
soul. So innocent. So touching.
She needed to become a better mother, but this girl, a tiny human life, intimidated the ever
lovin’ hell out of her.
She feared failure, most of all as a mother.
Cooper sat cross-legged on the floor in front of Harriet. “Can I take her out of her swing?” He
fixed his gaze on Laura. “Would that be all right with you?”
Her heart warmed. “Absolutely.”
Watching Cooper, who seemed pretty shy in most senses, come to life with her daughter in his
arms completely captivated Laura.
She’d struggled so much since Harriet’s birth. From wanting to give her daughter so much, to
fear of not loving her enough. Of resenting her because Johnson wanted nothing to do with them now.
The sound of giggles filled the air. Harriet and Cooper both wore gigantic smiles.
“I swear I didn’t make up the fact that she was fussy to get out of going out tonight,” Laura
blurted.
His gaze landed on her, as his smile disappeared. “I didn’t think that,” Cooper told her softly.
“Ok. Good.” Hey, brain? Shut up already.
An outside noise startled them both.
“What was that?” Cooper asked. He set Harriet back in her swing and jumped to his feet.
“Not sure.” She wondered that herself and followed Cooper. “What are you doing?”
“Going out to inspectigate.” He didn’t give her more time to react. Cooper yanked open the
door. “Looks like you’ve got a Peeping Tom!” he called out.
Laura stepped onto her porch, then laughed. “More like a Peeping Julian. What the hell are
you doing?”
Julian rubbed his ankle while sitting in the grass. “Being a nosy neighbor.”
Cooper growled. “You shouldn’t be watching through her window!”
“Hey,” Laura said, resting a hand on his shoulder, “it’s all right. He’s harmless, I swear.”
“I was actually making sure he was harmless.” Julian pointed at Cooper.
She couldn’t help it. Laura laughed. “Oh wow. Ok, Cooper, Julian’s so not a Peeping Tom.
Just a semi-annoying neighbor who I’ve known for years. Julian, Cooper’s a perfect gentleman, so
stop hurting yourself just to get a peek through my window.”
Cooper shot her a sheepish grin. “Guess I gotta stop playing knight in shining armor now.” He
moved to stand by her side.
“And I get to hobble over to my place,” Julian said as he climbed to his feet.
“Tell Xander and Ross I’m just fine, so they can tell Aspen and Nellie. No more peeping
through the window, either.” Laura wagged a finger at him.
Julian walked off with a wave, so the two headed back inside.
Harriet watched, wide eyed, at Cooper’s every move.
“She’s got her eye on you now,” Laura told him.
“I see that.” His smile returned. “Hungry?”
“I could eat.”
“I could cook,” Cooper suggested.
“Oh?” She couldn’t be more intrigued if she tried. Laura wanted to know everything about this
man.
“I happen to love to cook.” He got shy and red faced all of a sudden.
“I’m not opposed to seeing you in my kitchen,” she said with a smile.
“We’ll go out another night? See the town?” His tone held hope.
“I’d really like that,” Laura told him. “I might be able to get a sitter.”
“A sitter?” He shook his head. “Bring her along!”
Laura tried to read into his expression, but couldn’t. Was he upset? Bothered?
“Does she eat solid food yet?”
“No, I won’t start her on it until next month. So many conflicting ideas on when’s the right
time to give her solids,” Laura informed him.
He simply gave her a nod. “Mind if I rummage around in your kitchen?”
She gestured. “Have at it.”
Cooper tickled Harriet’s feet, then ambled into her kitchen, washed his hands, then began
opening cupboards.
He seemed to stop and think, or maybe his concentration was shot, but either way, watching
him mesmerized her.

*****

Why is she watching me like that?

Laura intently following Cooper’s every move made him nervous, but he couldn’t very well
ask her to stop while he worked in her kitchen, could he?
Being watched put his nerves on overdrive. He did his best to ignore her stare as he worked,
but agonized that she would see his quirks and question him.
Cooper made the assumption that anything was fair game and that she at least liked everything
she’d bought and stored in her fridge, freezer, and pantry.
When Harriet started to cry again and Laura tended to her, Cooper blew out a breath of relief.
He did his best work without an audience. If any of his quirks he hated showed up, at least she
wouldn’t see them.
Some things, he didn’t know how to explain.
Some? Try most. He shook his head in irritation.
Maybe Cooper pushed himself too far out of his comfort zone.
No. He could do this.
Sounds from the living room carried over. Laughter. Talking. Was Laura on the phone, or was
she talking to Harriet?
Either way, it gave him time.
Cooper put his entire focus on the task at hand.
Food. Something he knew well.
He maneuvered around the kitchen easily now, moving from spot to spot as he prepared a
meal. Something she would hopefully remember as something enjoyable. But he also was up in his
head too much. Too many conflicting, angry, and full-of-doubt thoughts filled him.
The sound of something slamming pulled Cooper from his head space fast. He spun around in
the midst of pots and pans on the stove to find Laura stalk out the front door.
What the…?
He spotted her sitting on the chair outside through the window.
Was she crying?
Cooper wanted to go out there and console her, but he sucked at this kind of stuff. He had no
idea how to react. Crying sometimes triggered him and brought back memories of nights with so many
tears.
His throat clogged with feeling.
Harriet? Where was she?
Cooper rushed toward her swing where he’d seen her last. Not in there.
He found her asleep in her bassinet.
Ok, good. At least, for the moment, the baby was content, but this whole scene turned out
pretty awkward for him.
Cooper went back to the kitchen and did what he loved and knew best.
 Chapter 7
The youngest of three sisters, Laura always felt like she got the comparisons to how her
siblings fared.
They’d always called her the most spoiled, but now, she’d become the laughingstalk.
Too bad a certain family member didn’t realize that she’d texted a group text which included
Laura instead of privately with other siblings.
Granted, she knew they were all talking shit about her, but Laura didn’t need to see the words.
Except now she had, and when confronting her siblings about it, they’d simply told her to grow up and
get over herself. If she couldn’t handle the truth, that was on her.
So, the truth was that she’d become a failure?
Did they all see her that way?
A car came down the street, music and bass blasting, but slowed in front of Laura’s house.
She glanced up, her cheeks tear-stained, as someone rolled down the window and held their
phone out.
“Payback’s coming!” the person yelled, then the car sped out of there, tires squealing.
Xander and Julian walked out of his place at that moment. Because why not? They always had
that crazy timing.
“The hell was that about?” Xander asked, striding over to her porch.
“Who knows?” Laura muttered.
“Are you ok? Where’s that guy? Did he upset you?” Xander asked gently.
“He’s inside while I’m taking a breather,” Laura said. “No, he hasn’t upset me. It’s my
sisters.” She held out her phone, not really sure why she wanted to show her cousin the texts.
Xander made a grunt sound and handed the phone back.
The door opened.
Both spun around.
Cooper stood there, looking a little lost. “Uh, so...food’s done.” He sent a quizzical look
Xander’s way.
Xander watched him in silence.
“I’m heading back inside. Thanks for checking up on me, Xander.” Laura stood, brushed off
her pants, and walked toward the door, not liking the strange tension between Cooper and her cousin.
“Ignore them, Laura,” Xander said softly. “No one should be judging you in this situation and
putting you down like that.”
She dared not remind him that she’d always done the same damn thing to everyone.
Xander waved, then took off, but he stopped and stared at them a couple of times before
walking to his car.
“Why does he keep coming over here? Do I bother him?” Cooper asked.
“He heard the squealing of tires and happened to walk out to see me on my porch,” Laura
explained. “Sorry about leaving you alone in there. I needed to clear my head.”
Cooper nodded, his expression unreadable. “It’s all good.”
Laura took a whiff. “Wow, smells great. So, are you a chef?”
Cooper’s lips curved up. “Nope. Just an avid lover of food.”
“What did you think of The Wooden Spoon?” she asked.
 His expression changed, and a look of panic flashed across his face. “Great.”
He didn’t sound all that enthusiastic, but she didn’t ask him to elaborate.
“How long are you going to be in town?”
There. A better conversation.
He shrugged. “Unsure.”
What was with his one word responses all of a sudden? This man puzzled her. Intrigued her,
too.
Laura checked on Harriet. Still sleeping. Relief slammed her, but damn it, if her daughter
napped too long, she’d be up all night.
Then again, a break from trying to understand this tiny human’s quirks and upsets sounded
good, too.
She used to think she was good at stuff. Then Laura became a mother.
No handbooks came with children. They should. Really, they should!
Cooper stood by the table, but again, Laura could not easily decipher his expression or mood.
She didn’t want to be that weird girl he barely knew, asking if he was upset over something. So, she’d
sit down, devour the dinner he made, and see what happened after that.
He’d set the table. Plates were full. Salmon, some kind of pasta, and roasted veggies. He’d
poured a glass of water.
“Cooper, this looks, and smells, divine.”
He gave her a nervous, but shy grin as he pulled up the seat across from her. “Thank you.”
They ate mostly in silence. What changed within him? Why had he gotten so quiet and
reserved? Something she did? Said?
He wouldn’t make eye contact.
Dread formed in her gut.
OK, Laura had dealt with far worse.
She took a bite of salmon and moaned in pleasure.
Cooper’s eyes finally met hers. “You ok?”
“Uh, yeah! That was a very good sound!” she exclaimed. “Cooper, this is amazing!”
“Oh. Well, thank you.” His cheeks reddened, and a small smile found its way to his face.
They ate in continued silence. “I’ve got the clean up,” Laura said softly. “Thank you.” She
stood to clear the table at the same time he did.
“I want to help,” he insisted.
Harriet chose that moment to wake up. She let it be known with a loud wail.
Cooper made a face and tried to cover his ears.
Huh, so did something about Harriet get to him?
“I’ve got her,” she said, rushing away, trying to understand his strange signals.
The foul stench affected her nose first.
“Oh, man,” Laura muttered, her stomach churning.
She hated diapers. Loathed them. Especially diapers filled with what brought on this rancid
smell.
She picked up her screaming child and headed toward her room, where she laid Harriet on the
diaper changing table.
Wails continued to invade her ears and her mind.
“I gotcha, kiddo,” Laura muttered, trying not to come all unglued from the chaos of the sound.
Too bad it seemed Harriet had the runs. Well, time for a bath. Guilt plagued her for all of the
things Cooper was doing that he didn’t have to.
Why he’d chosen to come over tonight when she had to bail was beyond her, but she felt ever
so grateful.
Why she let him was beyond her. Laura was pretty sure someone would inevitably comment
about allowing a man into her home whom she barely knew when she lived here alone with a baby.
Too late for second guessing that now. Cooper was here.
He didn’t give her those vibes, though. Granted, one couldn’t rely on vibes alone to get the
true accuracy of what a person was like.
She didn’t have time to fill the baby tub with Harriet already naked and screaming, so she
plugged the bathroom sink and filled the water to a lukewarm temperature. A washcloth already sat on
the edge of the counter, so Laura didn’t have to go far.
She cleaned her daughter free of the smelly mess, then wrapped her in her baby towel, moved
her to the changing table in her room again, and proceeded to apply baby lotion. Tears turned into
giggles as Laura rubbed the lotion all over her.
She couldn’t help but smile herself. “Better, huh?”
Harriet gurgled in response. Spit and bubbles came out of her lips.
By the time she brought Harriet out, clean, happy, and hungry, her house was empty.
No sign of Cooper.
Dishes were washed, table and kitchen wiped down.
No note. No sign of him.
She checked outside.
Nothing.
“Well, ok then,” Laura muttered, disappointment settling in her gut.
What happened this evening?

*****

“I messed up. I really messed up!” Cooper repeated on the phone when he finally made it back
to his room.
“What happened, buddy?”
“I went over there. Offered to cook. Then … I shut down. I just shut down. She went to take
care of the baby, so I cleaned up and left without a word.”
He waited for her to respond.
“Oh, Coop…”
“I know. I don’t know what I was thinking! She watched me cook, and it got me all flustered.
Then I just … well, shut down, like I said.” He flopped onto the couch, heaving a sigh. “I’m not good
at this. I knew I wasn’t good at this. I can’t even take the sound of a baby crying. I needed out before
anything else happened. Left without a word.”
“The only way you’ll get better is to put yourself out there.”
“I know but … she’s like … super pretty and nice.”
“You’re nice, too. You’re a good guy, and you deserve happiness.”
Happiness. What was that? What did it entail?
“Why am I like this?” he asked, his hands trembling. “I don’t want to be like this!”
 “Cooper, you’ve been through a lot. It’ll get better,” she insisted.
“Doesn’t feel like it,” he muttered. “I like her, but I don’t know how to do this. She’s always
gonna remember me as the guy who ran out.”
“Then for however long you’re there, show her that you’re not that guy. You can do this. You
can.”
Ten minutes later, Cooper calmed down long enough to hang up. He stared at his phone,
wanting desperately to call or even text Laura, but he had no idea what to say.
Admit what a freak of nature he was? Apologize and beg to see her again?
Give her his life story, which he never shared with anyone?
He called to check on his mom instead. He hadn’t given her a buzz in a while, and that wasn’t
fair.
Of course, her nurse answered. “Hello, Cooper.”
“Hi. How is she today?” he asked, his tone etched in worry.
“She stares out the window constantly. She misses you, Cooper.”
“I know. It’s hard to visit. Some doctors say I trigger her.”
Hurt filled him at the words. His mother might be a lost cause. She would never be as she
once was, though. Cooper knew that she’d always been a shell, but she’d been better.
Until the end.
Until they were both free.
Now, she lived in a facility, having one room all to herself, with other people who couldn’t
cope with life, couldn’t get back to the world of the living.
This was why he fought so hard, even when he got in a panic, to become a part of society.
He didn’t want to end up like his mother, but every day, he worried that was exactly what
would happen.
All of the years of isolation couldn’t make him blend in, it seemed. He had to do better!
 Chapter 8
A feeling of déjà vu in a sense plagued Laura the next day.
Yes, the tables sure had turned.
Karma came for her.
After dropping Harriet off at her aunt’s, her phone buzzed with activity. Too bad she didn’t
choose to ignore it.
A meme had been made about her, using a photo of her from last night on her porch.
All it said was ‘when karma comes calling’.
She looked horrible. Tears, all out of sorts, the works.
So, that’s what the deal was with that person driving by yesterday. A photo of her, just like
she’d done to Aspen years ago. Cinnamon Bay apparently didn’t forget and waited for the moment of
retaliation.
She pulled into the parking lot closest to Boardwalk Books, where she’d work a morning
shift.
Nellie unlocked the door for her. “You don’t look so hot.”
Laura grunted and walked in, then stopped short at Xander and Aspen in the corner, arms
wrapped around each other, squealing in excitement about something.
Nellie grinned. “Aspen hit a milestone on her YouTube channel. Those two make a great
team.”
She nodded, still watching. “Yeah, they do,” Laura said softly.
“So, back to you. Feeling ok?” Nellie asked.
Laura frowned, then showed her the Instagram post. “Someone’s enjoying this way too much.”
Nellie studied it, then made a sound of disgust. “Childish if you ask me. I’m sorry.”
“Are you?” The words flew out of her mouth before she could think.
“Yes, I am, and I hope you’re not insinuating that anyone here had something to do with it.”
Nellie narrowed her eyes.
Xander and Aspen pulled apart, both heading this way now. “What’s going on?” Xander
asked.
Nellie pointed at Laura’s phone.
Both he and Aspen peered over at it. A hand flew to Aspen’s mouth.
“Seriously?” Xander muttered, glancing up.
“That’s probably the car you heard last night that prompted you to come by,” Laura told him.
He shook his head. “Stupid.”
“People don’t forget, that’s for sure,” Aspen commented.
Laura couldn’t tell how she felt based on her tone.
Xander surprised Laura with a hug. “I’m sorry people are mocking your difficult days.”
She melted against her cousin. “Thank you.”
“Yeah, I agree.” Aspen, too, got in on the hugging.
Laura stiffened, causing her to pull away quickly.
“Sorry,” Aspen said.
“No, I… That was just unexpected from you,” Laura stuttered.
Aspen nodded, then faced Xander. “Gotta go. See you this afternoon.”
 He kissed his fiancée. “Love you. Have a great day!”
Aspen left the store after a few more goodbyes with Nellie and Xander.
“Well it’s almost time to open the doors. I spot Merrilee, which means new books she edited
are on the shelves today.” Xander shook his head with a chuckle. “So time to make sure she leaves the
damn displays alone.”
Laura and Nellie laughed. “Good luck with that!” Nellie told him as he turned on the Open
sign and unlocked the door. She pulled Laura off toward the back of the store. “So what happened last
night?”
Laura grunted.
“Xander told me. Sorry,” Nellie said sheepishly.
“Like… I was supposed to show that new guy around. I bailed because of my anxiety over
Harriet crying, and then he comes over, cooks for me, and leaves. Just … leaves while I’m bathing the
baby. No note, no nothing. I’m losing my touch!”
“So that’s why you were on the porch upset?”
Laura shook her head. “Nope, that was before he left. My sisters accidentally texted our group
text … with conversations, negative ones, about me.”
Nellie made a face. “Ouch.”
“Yep. Ouch indeed. I called and tried to talk about it, but it turned into a giant fight where
everyone reminded me of my shortcomings.”
“Nellie! Talk some sense into your brother!” Merrilee called out, pulling the two out of their
conversation.
“Staying out of this one!” Nellie responded with a chuckle.
“How about you, Laura?” Merrilee pleaded.
“Nope. You’re not getting me involved,” Laura told her.
“We should probably make it look like we’re working,” Nellie said. “Come on, let’s grab
some boxes and talk.”
Laura followed her to the back.
“So what was with you and that mysterious hottie?” Nellie asked.
“Should I tell Ross you said that?” Laura teased, hoping her cousin would take it as a joke.
She wasn’t sure if they’d gotten to the point in their relationship where she could get away with
joking like this.
Nellie smirked. “I think I have proof that I think Ross is the perfect hottie for me.” She pointed
at her stomach, which, if one looked very carefully and knew, you could spot a small baby bump.
“He’s awkward,” Laura said.
“Ross? Well, I know.” Nellie made a face. “What’s that got to do with anything?”
“No! I meant Cooper. It’s like … he’s trying too hard to push himself out of some comfort
zone, and then he gets shy all of a sudden,” Laura explained. “Maybe that’s why he ran. At least, I’m
hoping so. I mean… I don’t know what caused last night to happen.”
“From the little I’ve seen of him, he does seem to be shy,” Nellie told her. “How’d you meet
him again?”
“He helped me at the grocery store when, in a fit of a panic, I knocked over a can display
because Harriet started to cry,” Laura admitted.
“It’s scary, isn’t it?” Nellie asked, picking up a box. “Becoming a first time mother? It’s like,
everyone’s going to judge you because your child is doing what they know best: cry. You know it, but
you can’t help but panic and feel like they’re all watching.”
 “Exactly!” Laura agreed. “It’s scary.”
Nellie nodded. “Yes. I even felt it a little with Leila.”
Laura wanted to ask other things, but she feared even bringing up that subject. She was not
quite ready to share, even with another parent who might get it. Shame slammed her for that particular
feeling.
“Are you done talking about me?” Xander appeared at the doorway.
Laura giggled and gave her cousin an eye roll. “Unless you’re a baby, you were in no way part
of this conversation.”
“Goo goo ga ga.” He stuck his thumb in his mouth, making loud sucking sounds.
“He’s just jealous because of all the new babies getting attention,” Nellie shot back, nudging
the box toward him. “Here, make yourself useful.”
“Useful?” He arched a brow. “I had to battle a repeat offender shelf arranger while you two
came back here to gossip. It’s the two of you who need to be useful.”
Xander’s expression remained serious, causing Laura’s anxiety to heighten.
“I’m sorry. I needed-” She began.
Xander laughed. “I’m totally messing with you!”
“Yeah, how many times does Xander come back here and cry, then I have to kick his butt back
to work?” Nellie teased.
He shook his head. “Um no, it’s you who comes back here to cry.”
“Yeah, no. You’re usually the one to follow me because you can’t handle not knowing my
business!” Nellie said this with a smile.
A pang of sadness slammed Laura. She’d never had a sibling relationship the way these two
did. Everyone could tell Xander and Nellie were close knit. Always had been.
Bells jingled, so Xander left to check on things.
Nellie reached for another box, standing on her tip toes.
“Here, let me. You’re pregnant. Shouldn’t be doing that,” Laura said, gently nudging Nellie
aside. She pulled the box down a little more, but didn’t have the best grip, and books came tumbling
down on her. “Oof!”
“Whoa!” Xander came out of nowhere and pulled her back.
“I don’t know where this clumsy streak came from!” she grunted.
Xander let her go. “Next time, call for me. I’ll get the heavy boxes.”
“It wasn’t even heavy. Just too high for my short self,” Nellie quipped.
“Yeah, well, my pregnant sister doesn’t need to be doing that either,” he shot back. “Hey
Laura, just to warn you: Cooper’s in the store.”
“He is?” Nerves rattled her, but she also wanted to see him again, too.
“He has no idea you work here. I think he’s just browsing, but thought I’d warn you.” His eyes
met hers.
She wanted to go out there, but part of her didn’t.
“I’ll go handle the store,” Nellie said. “Have fun with the boxes, Macho Man.” She poked at
her brother’s arm before sauntering out.
Laura followed, much more comfortable alone with Nellie than Xander. She’d been getting
along with Nellie. Not that she hadn’t with Xander, but it still felt weird, knowing he ended up with
Aspen. Laura had no idea what things were said about her when she wasn’t around the two.
Stupid anxiety over what people thought. She’d never felt this way before telling Johnson
about her pregnancy and how he publicly blasted her after their break up, leaving her vulnerable and
alone.

*****

Charming little bookstore.

Cooper meandered through the aisles of Boardwalk Books. Of course, he’d run into people
who knew Laura, but what did he expect in a small town?
He needed to at least offer up an explanation. He’d inevitably leave town, but not giving
Laura anything more felt wrong. He didn’t want to go backwards in his abilities to be sociable, so
something needed to be said.
A flash of blonde hair caught his eye.
Laura.
Had she seen him and walked away?
With her back to him, Cooper had a chance to sneak around and see what she was doing.
She carried a box and went to the kids’ corner to put books on the shelves.
So, of course, he’d found the location of her second job.
“Can I help you with something, or are you going to watch our employee from afar?” Xander
asked, sneaking up to his side.
Cooper jumped, startled. “I’m not stalking her.”
Brows rose. “But you’re watching her now.”
Awkward much? Damn it. Cooper raked a hand through his hair. “I’m thinking about what I
want to say to her when I finally approach.”
Compassion shone in the man’s eyes. “I see.”
Xander continued to watch him. Cooper squirmed, hating that once again he’d found himself
under someone’s watchful eyes.
“Xander!” his sister called. “I need you, please!”
Finally, he moved away, but Xander stole one last look at him, which set Cooper on edge.
Laura still remained near the box of books, so he decided to make his move. “Hi.”
Baby blue eyes that matched the sky seared into his soul. “Hi,” she replied, her tone quiet. He
couldn’t be sure if she was angry or not.
“I … need to apologize for my abrupt departure last night.”
She shrugged.
Damn it. If only he were better at reading people’s responses. No matter how much he
practiced, how hard he tried, Cooper still couldn’t master it.
Laura stood, wiped her hands on her pants, then moved the box over. “It’s cool. You probably
had things to do.”
Overwhelmed, his palms were sweaty, and he could tell his pulse rate had begun to spike.
“No, I…” So many things he wished he could easily open up about.
“Cooper, it was fun, but I’m at a place in my life where I can’t play games. So, no hard
feelings on my part. We’ll leave things at that. Enjoy Cinnamon Bay while you’re here in town. Now,”
she gestured to the open box, “I do need to get back to work.”
Sure felt like a brush off to him.
He nodded. “Right, right.”
 Cooper backed away quickly, trying to unscramble the web of thoughts in his head.
Leaving the bookstore, Cooper took a walk. He put his sunglasses on, a great way to hide the
fact that he avoided eye contact, and strolled past all of the shops. Then he spotted a great bench to sit
on, so he took that moment to make a call.
“Hey, you.” His therapist answered cheerfully.
“Why is it I can’t talk to a woman without getting so damn flustered?”
She didn’t miss a beat. “Because you’ve been through a lot, and it’s going to take time. What
happened?”
“Came across her second job. Her cousin thinks I’m stalking her, and seems Laura is brushing
off my leaving and basically said ‘see ya around’. I’m horrible, aren’t I?”
“Stop that talk, Cooper. You know what to do when that negative influence fogs your brain.”
“I know I’ll move on and never see her again, but I want to be better. Don’t want to be this guy
with a messed up, tragic history who can’t find love. I’m twenty-eight, and I hate all of this.”
“Coop, I’m sorry. I know you’re disappointed in yourself, but again, you need to pull from that
mindset.”
“I know,” he muttered, watching as people strolled all along the boardwalk. Some couples
held hands. Others sat close, touching and showing their love.
Togetherness. He wanted that.
“It’s so pretty here,” he said out of the blue.
“Yeah? I’d love to see pictures. You said Cinnamon Bay, right?”
“Yeah. Cool little town. So many fun shops.”
“I’ve heard it’s a tourist attraction.”
“Yeah, there’s this legend of a love spice.”
She laughed. “Oh yeah?”
“Uh huh. I drank it yesterday with Laura.”
“Very interesting.”
“I don’t like that she thinks I’m playing games with her.” He fisted one hand and pounded his
knee with it.
“I hear the distress in your voice. You need to calm down.”
He closed his eyes and focused his senses to bring his levels of anxiousness down. Cooper
had to uncurl that fist and stop banging it against his bones.
“Sounds like your breathing is regulated. Are you better?”
“I think so,” Cooper muttered. “I want to be normal. Is that so wrong?”
“Cooper, you’re very normal.”
“Don’t tell me those lies!” he raised his voice. “I can’t go a day without being like this. Don’t
tell me it’s because of how I was raised. I’m tired of it!”
She remained silent.
“I’m sorry.”
“I know you are. Just remember, I’m proud of your progress, Cooper. It’ll all take time. Don’t
give up.”
“I’m trying not to, but it’s so damn hard to be a functional human being.” He leaned back, and
his muscles relaxed.
The last thing Cooper wanted was to turn out like his mother. She couldn’t handle things
anymore. She sat in her room, so still-like, unable to speak. Unable to live.
He had to make sure he never found himself in that state of mind, no matter what.
Another random document with
no related content on Scribd:
dezer namen. Van sommige vleinamen zijn verkleinnamen afgeleid
in alle of schier alle boven vermelde verkleinvormen. Van den
vleinaam H a y o , bij voorbeeld, zijn afgeleid de verkleinnamen
H a e i s e , H a e i t e , H a e i t s e , H a e i k e en H a e i t s j e (in
Nederlandsche spelling H a a i s e , enz.); van B o a y e (B o y e )
komen B o a i t e , B o a i t s e , B o a i k e , B o a i t s j e (volgens
Nederlandsche spelwijze B o i t e , enz.); van J e l l e zijn afgeleid
J e l s e , J e l t e , J e l t s e , J e l k e , J e l t s j e , enz.

Nog een andere naamsvorm is van de vleinamen afgeleid; te weten:

de patronymicale vorm op ing eindigende. Deze vorm, het echte, het
ware Oud-Germaansche patronymicum aanduidende, kan dus van
oorsprongswegen geene eigenlijke mansvóórnamen in ’t leven
roepen; hij duidt veeleer een maagschapsnaam aan, en is dan ook,
als inga, ink of ing, veelvuldig bij de Friesche, de Sassische en de
Frankische volksstammen, die gezamenlijk het Nederlandsche volk
uitmaken, als uitgang van maagschaps- of geslachtsnamen in
gebruik. Niettemin, sommigen van deze patronymicale, op ing
eindigende namen zijn heden ten dage, als bij misverstand (’t welk in
dezen zin ook bij andere Germaansche volken voorkomt), nog bij de
Friezen als mansvóórnamen in volle geijkt gebruik. Als zoodanigen
mogen hier vermeld worden: A l i n g , A m e l i n g , A s i n g en
A s i n g a , B a l i n g , B a l l i n g , B o a y i n g (B o o y i n g ),
Ebbing, Eling, Haring, Hemsing, Henning,
N a n n i n g , Ts j a l l i n g (T j a l l i n g ), W a l i n g en nog enkele
anderen. [217]

De hedendaagsche Friezen hebben de gewoonte hunner

voorouders om de mans- en vrouwenvóórnamen te verminken en te
vervormen door vleivormen en verkleiningsvormen (overigens
geenszins eene navolgenswaardige gewoonte), getrouwelijk
aangehouden. Zij breiden dit gebruik zelfs nog meer uit. Niet enkel
dat zij die verkorte en verknoeide namen hunner voorvaders trouw in
gebruik houden, als of die wannamen heel wat eigens en bijzonders
waren, maar zij blijven ook nog steeds voortgaan met dit verknoeien
hunner namen in vlei- en verkleinvormen. Vele reeds zeer verkorte
en verdraaide namen, vooral vrouwennamen, mishandelen zij rustig
verder, zoo dat die namen ten langen leste gansch onkenbaar
worden. Van de volledige namen C a t h a r i n a en M a r g a r e t h a ,
beiden van Griekschen oorsprong en beiden van schoone
beteekenis (te weten: „de reine” en „de perel”), was bij de Friezen in
den loop der eeuwen reeds T r y n t s j e en G r y t s j e (T r ij n t j e en
G r i e t j e ) geworden. Maar het schijnt als of voor de
hedendaagsche Friezen die namen nog niet genoeg verkort en
verbasterd waren. Immers maken zij in het dagelijksche leven de
wannamen T i n e of T y n k e en N i n e of N y n k e van T r y n t s j e
of C a t h a r i n a , en K i k e van G r y t s j e of M a r g a r e t h a . Even
zoo verknoeit men D i r k of D u r k (voluit D i e d e r i k ) wel tot
D u y e , de vrouwennamen D i r k j e (beter D i e d e r i k a ) tot
D u k k e , S i b b e l t s j e tot P i b b e , J e l l e wel tot J e y e ,
J e l t s j e tot J e i of J e i k e , A e l t s j e (A a l t j e ) en B a u k j e tot
A e y e en B a e y e , A u k j e en B a r t e l t s j e tot A k k e en
B a k k e , H y l k j e en H i l t s j e tot H i k e en H i k k e , E e l k j e tot
E k e ; Ts j e a r d t s j e (T j e e r d t j e ) tot K e k k e , L u t s k e tot
L u k k e of L o k k e , J i t s k e tot J i k k e , R o m k j e tot P o m m e ,
F r o u k j e tot P o i , (S j o e r d t s j e ) tot S j u t t e , enz., enz. Deze
nieuwerwetsche en leelijke naamsmisvormingen van den laatsten
tijd worden thans in den regel niet meer in de schrijftaal opgenomen,
ofschoon A k k e , B a e y e (B a a y e ) en J e i k e ook al een enkele
maal in de boeken van den burgerlijken stand vermeld staan.
Intusschen—ware ’t honderd of twee-honderd jaren vroeger
opgekomen om R o m k j e te mismaken tot P o m m e en
S i b b e l t s j e tot P i b b e , licht hadden wij thans ook Friezinnen die
als P o m m e en P i b b e in het kerkelijke doopregister en bij den
burgerlijken stand te boek stonden. En [218]de geleerden, die
honderd jaren na ons zullen leven, zouden zich dan mogen
inspannen zoo veel ze wilden en navorschen wat ze wilden, de
oorsprong en de beteekenis van de namen P o m m e en P i b b e en
P o i , dan zekerlijk als zeer eigenaardig Friesch vermeld, zoude hun
een raadsel moeten blijven.

Nemen wij als een enkel voorbeeld om aan te toonen hoe zeer de
oude, volledige namen heden ten dage in Friesland verbasterd zijn,
den naam E k e in behandeling. E k e , zoo heeten eenige mij
bekende Friezinnen, althans zoo worden zij in het dagelijksche leven
genoemd. Eene enkele staat ook werkelijk in de kerk en ten
gemeentehuize als E k e geboekt. In den regel echter, die E k e
genoemd worden, staan als E e l k j e te boek. E k e ! korter kan het
niet! Want dat ke is slechts een aanhangsel dat den verkleinvorm
maakt; lam of laem, bij voorbeeld, wordt lamke, lammetje, in het
Friesch. Neemt men dat aangehangene ke weg, dan blijft er van den
naam E k e anders niet over als eene enkele E. Is dat nu een naam,
een eigene Friesche naam? Wel neen! E k e is een vleivorm, een
poppenamme van E e l k j e , dat weet men nog. En de naam
E e l k j e is op zijn beurt weêr een verkleinvorm, door achtervoeging
van het aanhangsel je, van den mansnaam E e l k e . Zoo maakt
men, door ze den verkleinvorm te geven, vrouwennamen van
mansnamen: P y t t s j e , (P i e t j e ) van P i e t (P i e t e r , P e t r u s ),
B a u k j e van B a u k e (B a v o ), enz. Met E e l k e zijn wij
intusschen nog lang niet waar wij wezen moeten. Immers de
mansnaam E e l k e is op zich zelven ook weêr een verkleinvorm,
door achtervoeging van ke gemaakt. De Friezen toch, hierin
onderscheiden van andere Germaansche volken, die slechts hunnen
knapen, zoo lang ze nog kleine kinderkens zijn, met verkleinnamen
noemen—de Friezen hielden en houden die namen in
verkleinvormen ook in gebruik als de kinderen tot knapen en
jongelingen, zelfs tot mannen zijn opgegroeid. Nevens E e l k e staat
E e l t j e , het eerste met den Frieschen, het laatste met den
Hollandschen verkleinvorm; beide mansnamen beteekenen het
zelfde, beiden zijn het verkleiningsvormen van E l e . In der daad
worden zij, die E e l k e of E e l t j e heeten, in den dagelijkschen
omgang dan ook wel E l e , genoemd. Maar met E l e zijn wij [219]ook
nog niet tot den oorspronkelijken vorm des naams gekomen. Ook
E l e is weêr een verkorte, een versletene vorm. E l e staat in de
plaats van E d e l e , en is door zeer gewone uitslijting van de d (de)
ontstaan. Ook in het Hollandsch zegt men wel eêl voor edel,
vereêlen voor veredelen, vooral in dichterlijken stijl. E d e l e is de
volle vorm van dezen naam, die onder ons nog in zoo menigen
verschillenden verklein- en vleivorm voorkomt. E d e l e is een naam
die eene beteekenis heeft, die eenen zin te kennen geeft. Immers de
naam E d e l of E d e l e beteekent in der daad de edele, de edele
man. E d e l of E d e l e is de nieuwere vorm van den Oud-Frieschen
mansnaam A t h a l , dat is A d e l . Zoo heette, volgens de
overlevering, de tweede Prins van Friesland, de zoon van den
eersten, van F r i s o , en hij leefde 245 jaren voor Christus’ geboorte.
En A t h a l of A d e l , dien naam hebben vele oude Friezen
gedragen. Ook is de naam van het roemruchtige Oud-Friesche
geslacht A d e l e n er van afgeleid, en niets als een patronymikum
van A d e l . 6 De vrouwelijke vorm van A t h a l of A d e l is A t h a l a
of A d e l a , en dezen naam hebben zekerlijk vele Friezinnen in den
ouden tijd gedragen. Welke vader gaf niet gaarne zulken schoonen
naam, schoon in beteekenis en schoon in klank, aan zijn dochterke?
Ook was deze naam niet alleen bij de Friezen, maar bij alle Oud-
Germaansche volken in gebruik. Ook bij de oude Franken, die
gedeeltelijk de Germaansche voorouders der hedendaags geheel
verwaalschte Franschen geweest zijn. De naam A d e l a der
Frankische vrouwen is nog als Adèle bij de hedendaagsche
Fransche dames in gebruik. Andere volken, niet het minst ook de
Hollanders, hebben ook hier in, als in zoo menige andere zaak, de
Franschen nagevolgd, en zoo is nu Adèle vrij wel een
kosmopolitische naam geworden.

De Friezen echter, trouw gehecht aan hunnen Germaanschen

volksaard, hebben zich steeds te edel geacht om zulke en
[220]andere Fransche en verfranschte namen en naamsvormen te
dragen. Zij hebben ze steeds, met betamelijke minachting, van zich
gewezen. Maar zoo er nu eene Friezin is, wier verknoeide naam
E k e haar verdriet, of zoo er eene Friesche moeder of grootmoeder
is, die er iets op tegen heeft dat haar kind of kleinkind E e l k e of
E e l t j e zal heeten zoo het een knaap is, of E e l k j e als het een
meiske is—wel nu—met die, en met honderden andere soortgelijke
verkorte en verknoeide namen staat of valt haar Friesdom niet. Dat
men dan de volle, onverbasterde, oude en schoone namen A d e l
en A d e l a , vol beteekenis, weêr in gebruik neme en in eere
herstelle! Bij dien vrouwennaam hoede men zich echter wel dat men
er geen Fransche Adèle van make! Men late, bij ’t uitspreken, den
klemtoon of de stemsate rusten op de eerste en op de derde
lettergreep, op A en a. Zoo draagt men eenen echten Frieschen
naam, in volledigen, schoonen vorm.

Bij ’t verknoeien en verbasteren van de oude, oorspronkelijke

Friesche mans- en vrouwennamen spelen de verkleinvormen eene
zeer groote rol. Wij hebben boven reeds gezien dat de namen
E e l k e en E e l t j e , E e l k j e en E k e alle vier verkleinvormen
vertoonen door de aanhangsels ke, tje, en je, en deze vormen
vinden wij terug in een zeer groot aantal hedendaagsche namen,
zoo wel van mannen als van vrouwen. Bij voorbeeld in A u k e en
B a u k e , in E p k e , H a r k e en Y k e , in W i l k e en U u l k e
(U i l k e ), in F o l k e en Ts j e p k e (T j e p k e ), in S i p k e en
W o p k e ; dan in H a e n t s j e (H a a n t j e ) en H a n t s j e , in
J e n t s j e en Y n t s j e , in L u u t s j e , R i n t s j e en W i l t s j e ,
(H a n t j e , enz.) allen mansnamen. En in A u k j e en B a u k j e ,
Y m k j e en S j o u k j e , F r o u k j e en H o u k j e , F e i k j e ,
F o e k j e en F o k j e , H i s k j e en L i s k j e , H y l k j e en
L i e u w k j e , L o l k j e en N a m k j e met O f k e en O e d s k e ,
M a e i k e en M i n k e , R i e m k e en R i n s k e , S y t s k e en
W y t s k e , S a e p k e (S a a p k e ) en S w o b k j e , Te a t s k e en
Y f k e , allen vrouwennamen. Deze en soortgelijke namen erkent
nog iedereen als verkleinvormen, omdat de aanhangsels ke, tje en je
nog heden zoowel in de schrijf- als in de spreektaal in volle gebruik
zijn. Anders is het met de Friesche namen die uitgaan op
verkleinende aanhangsels welke in de hedendaagsche spreek- en
[221]schrijftaal niet meer voorkomen. Slechts de man die de Oud-
Friesche taalkunde in het bijzonder heeft beoefend, verstaat dat er
verkleinvormen schuilen in de namen A t s e en W a t s e , S y t s e
en W y t s e , R e i t s e , W e i t s e en S w e i t s e , D o a i t s e en
H o a i t s e , H o a t s e en H a i t s e , F e t s e en J e t s e , T j i t s e
en R i t s e , in R i e n t s , B i e n t s en G r a e t s , in U u l t s e n en
L u u t s e n , in Y t s e n en M o n t s e n , in D o u w t s e n , J e l t s e n
en M a r t s e n ; verder in A b e l e en H e a b e l e , A n d e l e en
B a r t e l e , E a b e l e en D o e k e l e , L y k l e en R y k l e ,
S e a k e l e en S i b b l e , J a k k e l e , N a m m e l e en O e b e l e .
En toch is dit het geval. Het aanhangsel tse (ts, tsen) is een Oud-
Friesche verkleinvorm, en le eveneens. Dit blijkt ook hier uit dat
velen dezer namen nog heden ook in onverkleinde vormen bij ons in
gebruik zijn. Bij voorbeeld: A t t e (de vrouwelijke verkleinvorm
A t s j e is vooral niet zeldzaam), F e i t e , H a i t e en H o a i t e ,
T j i t t e of T i e t e , M o n t e , A b e , E a b e , B a r t , D o e k e ,
N a m m e n (uit den verkleinvorm N a m m e l e is de n van den
oorspronkelijken vorm N a m m e n gesleten, omdat de n en de l te
veel op elkanderen stooten), O e b e (O b b e of U b b o ), enz. Het
Oud-Friesche verkleinende aanhangsel ts is volkomen een en het
zelfde als het Nieuw-Friesche aanhangsel ke. Immers zijn k en ts of
tsj wisselletters in het Friesch. De ts of tsj neemt in het Friesch en
Engelsch dikwijls de plaats in van de k in de verwante Germaansche
talen. Men denke aan tsjerke en church tegenover kerk en kirche,
aan tsjiis en cheese tegenover kaas en käse.

De hedendaagsche Friesche uitspraak van het Hollandsche

verkleinende aanhangsel tje als tsje, bij voorbeeld bytsje voor beetje,
potsje voor potje, Pytsje voor Pietje, enz. is eigenlijk en
oorspronkelijk tjse, tse, of ke. Zoo dat men eigenlijk byttsje (byt-tsje
= bytke) moest schrijven, met Pyttsje, pottsje, enz. Immers de
woorden byt, pot, Pyt eindigen uit zich zelven reeds op t, en ’t
aanhangsel tje of tse of tjse begint er mede. Even eens moest men
A t t s e (At-tse = At-ke = At-tje = de kleine A t t o ) schrijven, met
Ts j i t t s e , L u u t t s e n , enz., in plaats van A t s e , Ts j i t s e ,
L u u t s e n . Die aangaande deze ts = k, en tse of tjse = ke als
verkleinend aanhangsel iets naders weten wil, leze eene zeer
belangrijke aanteekening van onzen taalgeleerde J. H. Halbertsma,
bij zijn verhaal De treemter fen it Sint-Antoni-Gasthuws. [222]

Ook een zeer oud verkleinend aanhangsel is le, dat achter namen
als E a b e l e , D o e k e l e , N a m m e l e geplaatst is.
Oorspronkelijk is het volkomen een en het zelfde als het
verkleinende achtervoegsel lyn bij de oude Hollanders en
Vlamingen, als lein bij de hedendaagsche Hoogduitschers, in de
woorden maegdelyn, oogelyn, vogellyn (niet vogelijn), en blümlein,
röslein, äuglein.

Achter den verkleinvorm ke eischt de Oud-Hollandsche, alsook de

Hoogduitsche uitspraak eene n (b.v. roosken, meisken, en röschen,
mädchen), waar de Friesche uitspraak die n achterwege laat:
roaske, fanke. En zoo is het ook met den uitgang lyn of lein, die in
het Friesch, zonder n, als le luidt. Zoo als de oude Friezen in deze
zaak deden, spreken nog heden de Zwaben in Opper-Duitschland,
die rösle, mädle zeggen; terwijl de Zwitsers in hun röseli, maidli de i
nog laten hooren, maar de n ook niet.

Eene bijzondere oorzaak van het verval der Friesche namen is

gelegen in het onverstand van allerlei vreemde, onfriesche
predikanten en pastoors, schoolmeesters, notarissen, ambtenaren
van den burgerlijken stand, enz. in Friesland. Van ouds schreven de
Friezen natuurlijk hunne Friesche namen volgens de Friesche
spelling en niet volgens de Hollandsche of eene andere. Trouwens,
eene andere schrijfwijze is ook niet mogelijk, ten zij men er niet om
geve zoo men onzin voor den dag brengt. Die Friesche spelling van
Friesche namen en woorden is de eenig goede, en is door alle
Friezen, die slechts een weinig gevoel voor taalzuiverheid, slechts
een weinig kennis van spelling en letterwaarde hebben, dan ook
steeds gevolgd tot in deze eeuw. Sedert de helft dezer eeuw zijn er
al meer en meer vreemde, onfriesche, meest Hollandsche
onderwijzers, predikanten, pastoors en ambtenaren in de Friesche
gewesten aangesteld geworden. Sommigen van deze
vreemdelingen, ja bijna allen, geven den Friesche taal geenszins de
eere die haar toekomt, waardeeren haar niet of minachten haar,
omdat zij haar niet kennen, omdat zij haar dwazelijk uit der hoogte
aanzien voor een verbasterd en leelijk volksdialect. Anderen zelfs
haten haar, haten de Friesche taal omdat zij hun moeielijkheden in
den weg legt in hun verkeer met het Friesche volk, haten haar omdat
de Friesche taal hen dwingt zich in te spannen en nog wat te leeren
—een zware eisch voor waanwijze [223]betweters. Die willen dan wel
het Friesch schoeien op de Hollandsche leest, het Friesch dwingen
in het Hollandsche spoor, met andere woorden: zij willen Friesche
namen en woorden schrijven volgens Hollandsche spelregels en—
begaan dan domheden, waar mede zij den waren Friezen ergeren.
Deze schadelijke invloed van vreemdelingen op de Friesche taal,
waartegen de Stand-Friezen dienen te waken en zich krachtig te
verzetten, blijkt ook uit de dwaze spelling waarin heden ten dage
sommige Friesche namen in nieuwsbladen en andere openbare
geschriften voor ’t licht komen. Daar vindt men wel S i e t s c h e en
W i e t s c h e , J e t s c h e en V e t j e met V o k e l t j e en
V r o u w k j e , Z w o p k j e en Z w e i t s e , R i n z e en B i n z e ,
Ta e k e en Ta e t s c h e , Z ij t z e en V o l k e r t geschreven, in
plaats van S y t s k e en W y t s k e , J e t s k e en F e t s j e (F e t j e ),
F o k e l t s j e (F o k e l t j e ) en F r o u k j e , S w o b k j e ,
S w e i t s e , R i n s e , B i n s e , Te a k e , Te a t s k e , S y t s e en
Folkert.

Die tweeklank ie in plaats van den enkelen klank dien de Friezen

met y afbeelden, die ie waarmede de Hollanders meenen de
Friesche zuivere, lange i (y of î) te kunnen weêrgeven, is in namen
als S i e t s e en W i e b r e n in het geheel niet op zijne plaats. De ie
is in het Friesch immers duidelijk een tweeklank, gelijk zij
oorspronkelijk in het Hollandsch ook was, en nog heet. De Friezen
laten in hunne uitspraak dan ook zeer te recht nog duidelijk hooren
dat de ie een tweeklank is, in tegenoverstelling met de Hollanders
die deze oude en zuivere uitspraak verloren hebben, en geen
onderscheid meer kennen tusschen ie en i of y. Immers in het woord
wiet (nat) laten de Friezen eenen gants anderen klank hooren als in
W y t (s k e ), een onderscheid dat het verstompte gehoor der
Hollanders niet meer schijnt te kunnen vatten.—De sch in woorden
als school, schoen, schip, visch, wasschen wordt in het Friesch,
even als in de Noordsche talen, als sk uitgesproken: skoale, skoe,
skip, fisk, waskje. Door deze Friesche uitspraak in de war gebracht,
meenen sommige waanwijze vreemdelingen ook de sk in de namen
W y t s k e , G e l s k e , A n s k e , enz. als sche te moeten
verhollandschen, en er W i e t s c h e , G e l s c h e , A u s c h e van
te moeten maken. Intusschen, de sk in W y t s k e , G e l s k e ,
A n s k e komt geenszins overeen met de Hollandsche sch. O neen!
Immers in deze en soortgelijke [224]namen is sk slechts eene
toevallige samenvoeging van letters. Hier staan de s en de k slechts
bij toeval naast elkanderen, en vormen geenszins eene bijzondere
letterverbinding. Hier behoort de s aan de lettergrepen W y t s ,
G e l s en A n s (A n s o ), en de k is de eerste letter van het
verkleinende aanhangsel ke. Dus W y t s - k e (W y t s - k e , de kleine
—of vrouwelijke—W y t s e ), en niet Wyt-ske, Wyt-sche of Wiet-sche.
—De Friesche taal kent geen letter ij, zooals de Hollandsche tongval
en het hedendaagsche geijkte Nederlandsch. Men kan, of liever mag
dus niet W ij t s e , S ij t s e , W ij b r e n , S ij b o u t schrijven.
W y t s e , S y t s e , W y b r e n , S y b o u t of S i b o u t moet het
wezen. Ook kent de Friesche taal niet de letters v en z. Die halve,
verloopene, vloeiende en suizende medeklinkers zijn te flauw en te
zwevende voor de Friesche tonge; zij worden in het Friesch door f
en s vervangen. Dat men dus niet Z ij t z e , B i n z e , Z w e i t z e en
Z w o p k j e , noch ook V e t j e , V r a n k , V e d d e , V o l k e r t of
V o l m e r schrijve, maar F e t s j e (F e t j e ), F r a n k , F e d d e ,
F o l k e r t , F o l m e r met S y t s e , B i n s e , S w e i t s e en
S w o b k j e . Even min schrijve men de bijzondere Friesche en
Engelsche tweeklank ea (in de woorden brea of bread, dea of dead),
waar deze klank in Friesche persoonsnamen voorkomt, als ae, als of
het een Oud-Hollandsche lange a ware. Dus niet A e b e , Ta e k e ,
Ta e t s c h e , A e d e , P a e z e n s gelijk men heden ten dage wel
doet, maar E a b e , Te a k e , Te a t s k e , E a d e (of Æ b e ,
Æ d e ) en P e a s e n s .

Mogen zulke misvormde namen nooit meer worden geschreven! Dat

de Friezen zich niet door allerlei vreemdelingen allerlei knollen voor
citroenen in de handen laten stoppen. Maar dat zij zuiver Friesch
mogen blijven, ook in de goede Friesche spelling hunner Friesche
namen! Immers, men kan geen Friesche woorden en namen, geen
Friesche klanken met Hollandsche letterteekens afbeelden. Die dit
nochtans doet, die W i e t s c h e schrijft en Z ij t z e , Ta e k e en
V e t j e , handelt even dwaas als de man die Engelsche, Duitsche en
Fransche namen met Hollandsche klanken en letterverbindingen
afbeeldt—die dus Dzjeems, Loedwieg en Zjaak, of Swensie,
Karrelsroe en Bordo schrijven zoude, in stede van J a m e s ,
L u d w i g , J a c q u e s , S w a n s e a , K a r l s r u h e en
B o r d e a u x . [225]

Alles wisselt, verandert, verslijt, teert uit, sterft af, in ’t

ondermaansche. Alles! Ook de bijzonderheden in zeden, taal en
kleeding der Friezen, al hoe trouw anders de Friezen in den regel
ook gehecht zijn aan de eigenaardigheden, door hunne edele en
roemrijke voorouders hen overgeleverd. In deze zaken toch zijn de
hedendaagsche Friezen geenszins meer de zelfden, die ze van ouds
geweest zijn, die ze nog voor honderd en voor vijftig jaren waren.
Zelfs kan de opmerkzame veel korter tijdsbestek noemen, om
veranderingen aan te toonen. Ook in de Friesche mans- en
vrouwennamen doet zich deze wisseling en verslijting, dit afsterven
of buiten gebruik raken bemerken—al is dit ook betrekkelijk gering
en weinig, veel minder dan bij onze stamverwante volken met hunne
volkseigene namen geschiedt. Maar toch droeg deze en gene onder
onze voorouders in de middeleeuwen en later eenen naam die thans
onder ons niet meer gehoord wordt. Ja zelfs in de vorige eeuw nog
kwamen onder de Friezen sommige namen, goed Oud-Friesche
namen voor, die men thans slechts uiterst zeldzaam of in het geheel
niet meer aan kinderen geeft, ’t en zij dan in veranderden vorm, als
R i c h j e voor R i x t a , L u t s k e voor L u x t a , J e l t s j e voor
J i l d o u , R e i n t s j e voor R e i n o u . Ook in deze zaak heerscht —
— de mode! Sedert de helft dezer eeuw vooral schijnt het alsof de
Friesche namen sommigen ontaarden Friezen niet meer goed
genoeg zijn. Die verbasterden en verbijsterden tooien hun kroost,
dwaas genoeg! liever met de romantische namen van allerlei
vreemde lui, vooral liefst met Fransche en Engelsche namen, dan
met de eenvoudige en eerlijke namen der eigene voorouders. Hier
en daar is er onder ons eene ijdele moeder en een zwakke vader die
aan zoontje of dochterke niet den Frieschen naam geven van
hunnen eigenen vader, van hunne eigene moeder, gelijk de Friesche
zede dit van ouds eischt, maar eenen vreemden, eenen
zoogenoemd mooien naam. Daartoe wordt dan de Friesche naam,
die het kind rechtmatig toekomt, verknoeid en verdraaid,
zoogenoemd verfraaid, maar in der daad misvormd en onkenbaar
gemaakt. Of wel—men bedenkt maar eenen geheel vreemden
naam, hoe vreemder en romantischer, hoe mooier; bij voorbeeld:
A u r e l i a voor A u k j e ; E l l a voor J e l t s j e ; H e n r i voor
H a r k e ; G e o r g voor G o s s e ; T i t u s voor T i e t e of Ts j i t t e ,
enz. [226]Dwaas, die zoo handelen! Onwaardig, onfriesch, die zoo
doen! Zal men den kinderen de oude en eervolle namen der eigene
ouders en voorouders onthouden, die kenmerken hunner Friesche
afstamming, de edelste onder de Germanen? Zal men ze tooien (?)
met de soms verachtelijke namen van vreemde schurken en
schelmen, hoeren en snoeren misschien? Neen immers! Geen ware
Fries, geen Stand-Fries zal aldus zijn kroost ontadelen.

Behalve deze dwaze en treurige gezindheid, die het vreemde,

opgesmukte, opzichtige, gekunstelde in alle opzichten verkiest
boven het eigene, eenvoudig-schoone, degelijke,—eene gezindheid
die gelukkiger wijze onder de Friezen nog weinig voorkomt, minder
dan bij eenig ander volk—is daar nog eene andere reden die het
uitsterven en verbasteren van Friesche namen ten gevolge heeft.
Die reden is gelegen in de meening welke niet weinigen, overigens
goed Frieschen Friezen eigen is, dat de Friesche namen leelijk zijn,
leelijk klinken, dat het slechts zinlooze klanken zijn, en dat zij den
dragers van die namen iets onbeschaafds, iets weinig
gedistingueerds (basterd-woorden passen bij verbasterde
gezindheden) zouden verleenen. En fijn beschaafd en gepolitoerd
(op zijn Fransch, God betere ’t!), ook gedistingueerd (al is het dan
ook valsch) willen er heden ten dage zoo velen zijn!
Nu—ik wil hier ook niet ten eenen male ontkennen dat sommige
Friesche namen, zoo wel van mannen als van vrouwen, in der daad
niet schoon van klank en vorm zijn. Ik kan mij zeer wel voorstellen
dat deze of gene, met een fijn ontwikkeld gehoor en met goeden
smaak begaafd, namen als S j e r p , N a m m e l e , O e g e ,
Oebele, Goaitsen, Durk, Harm, Freark, Olfert,
H o a t s e , J i s k , G o u k e , G u r b e , W o p k e , namen als
Eke, Baeye, Akke, Wobbeltsje, Gatske,
Jisseltsje, Nammentsje, Murkje, Jaeike,
S j o e r d t s j e , leelijk, zeer leelijk, op den duur ondragelijk vindt.
Maar aan deze, in zich zelven reeds misvormde, verkorte namen is
men immers ook niet gebonden! Men kan die namen in hunnen
oorspronkelijken, volledigen, onverbasterden vorm herstellen. Dan
zijn ze niet leelijk, noch zonder zin. Hier boven hebben wij dit reeds
aangetoond bij ’t behandelen der namen E k e of E e l k j e , E e l k e
of E e l t s j e met S j o e r d en S j o e r d t s j e , F r e a r k en S i e r k
enz. Als eene kleine proeve, hoe men in deze zaak te handelen
[227]hebbe, wil ik aan het einde van deze verhandeling een lijstje
geven van eenige hedendaagsche, verbasterde en verkorte Friesche
namen, met hunne Oud-Friesche, volledige vormen daar achter.

Al geef ik toe dat eenige, zelfs vele hedendaagsch Friesche namen

leelijke, wanklinkende, onbehagelijke vormen vertoonen, dit is toch
geenszins bij allen het geval. De mansnamen A l l e r t , E d s a r d of
I d s e r t , A l e f , A l g e r , A y o l t (meest in Groningerland in
gebruik), B r u c h t , F r a n k , J i l d e r t , W y b r a n d , S y b r a n d
en G e r b r a n d , O n n o , G e r l o f , Ts j a l l i n g , H a y o ,
Hillebrand, Hubert, Hero, Ivo, Meinert,
R e i n d e r t , Ta c o , H a r t g e r , en de vrouwennamen
B r e c h t j e , Y m k j e , S i b r i c h en W i b r i c h , A u k j e ,
M i n k e , W y t s k e en S y t s k e , W y p k j e , R i n s k e , E l s k e ,
G e e s k e zijn namen die, al zijn het ten deele ook slechts
verdraaide en verkorte namen, toch geenszins leelijk van klank en
vorm zijn te noemen. Deze en vele soortgelijke namen hebben in de
mansnamen iets krachtigs, edels, manhaftigs, in de vrouwennamen
iets liefelijks, ongekunstelds, dat Fries en uitman behaagt. Maar, het
zij dat men nu deze namen in deze vormen aanhoude of afschaffe,
het zij men ze tot hunne oorspronkelijke zuivere vormen terug
brenge, men wachte zich wel die namen nog meer te verdraaien, in
de meening ze te verfraaien. Ware misbaksels en monsters van
namen zijn er al, door dat zoogenoemde „mooier maken”, door
weinig belezene en weinig beschaafde, door smakelooze menschen
tot stand gebracht. Die R o m k j e tot R o m e l i a , W o b k j e tot
W o b b i n a , G e e s k e tot G e z i e n a , E l s k e tot E l z i e n a ,
A a l t j e tot A l i d a , J e l t j e tot J e l l i n a , S j o e r d t j e tot
S j o e r d i n a , F o k e l t j e tot F o k e l i n a , of D o e d e tot
D o e d e r u s , S i b b l e tot S y b i l l u s , A n n e tot A n n e e ,
F e d d e tot F e d d e r u s , E a b e l e tot A b e l i u s , T i m e n tot
T i m o t h e u s , B a r t e l e tot B a r t h o l o m e u s , J e n t j e tot
G e n t i u s , H e s s e l tot H e s s e l i u s , J i l l e r t tot J i l l a r d u s
maakt, geeft daar door een bewijs van onverstand en wansmaak.
Gelukkig is deze dwaasheid bij ons Friesche volk tusschen Flie en
Lauwers, dus bij de kern des geheelen Frieschen volks, veel minder
in zwang dan bij de andere Friesche stammen, vooral bij
Groningerlanders en Oost-Friezen. Dezen maken van R o e l f k e ,
S w a a n t j e , G e r k j e , G e e r t j e , L a m m e c h i e n en
L u b b e c h i e n (in ’t [228]eigenlijke Friesland L a m k j e en
L u b k j e ), van F r o u k j e , enz. R o e l f i n a , S w a a n t i n a ,
G e r c o l i n a , G e e r t j e d i n a , L a m m e c h i e n a en
L u b b e c h i e n a , F r o u k e l i n a , enz.; de Oost-Friezen van
H a i k e (de vrouwelijke vorm van H a y o ), H a y o n e t t a en
H a y o l i n a , van G e e s k e , H i l k e en L u b k e wel G e e s k e a ,
H i l k e a en L u b k e a . Dit zijn ware monsters van namen,
wannamen, die hoe eer hoe liever buiten gebruik moeten gesteld
worden, en die geen waarlijk beschaafd man zijnen kinderen geven
zal. Dan nog maar liever geheel vreemde namen, zoo als zij doen
die eenen knaap, welke naar zijnen grootvader H e t t e of T i e t e
moest heeten, H e c t o r of T i t u s noemen, of een meiske dat den
naam van hare grootmoeder A u k j e of H e i l t j e toekwam,
A u r e l i a of H e l e n a noemen—al geeft zulke handelwijze dan ook
getuigenis van onfriesche gezindheid, van weinig gevoel voor de
eere van ’t eigene volk, van de eigene voorouders. Dat men echter
oorspronkelijk onfriesche namen als K l a a s , T h ij s , P i e r , J a n
en K e e s , als N e e l t j e , L e e n t j e , T r ij n t j e , G r i e t j e ,
A n g e n i e t j e , M a r t j e , enz., die grootendeels ook bij de
Hollanders en andere Nederlanders in deze vormen voorkomen,
terug brengt tot de oude volle vormen N i c o l a a s , M a t t h e u s ,
Petrus, Johannes, Cornelis, Cornelia,
M a g d a l e n a , C a t h a r i n a , M a r g a r e t h a , A g n e s en
M a r t h a , daar kan niemand wat op tegen hebben. Dat druischt niet
in tegen den goeden smaak. In tegendeel, die volle namen zijn verre
weg te verkiezen boven de hier vermelde verdraaide en ingekorte
verbasteringen daar van.

Reeds in de vorige eeuw is men begonnen sommige Frieschen

mansnamen, die op eene toonlooze e eindigen (H o b b e , Y n t e ,
H a r k e ), welluidender, aannemelijker te maken door die e met eene
o te verwisselen, en dus van bovengenoemde namen H o b b o ,
I n t o , H a r c o te maken. Deze namen, op o eindigende, vertoonen
in der daad, volkomen of ten naasten bij, de Oud-Friesche vormen,
waarvan de namen op toonlooze e slechts verbasteringen,
afslijtingen uitmaken. Men handelt dus zeer redelijk zoo men die
oorspronkelijke o weêr in zijn recht herstelt. Ook zijn deze
naamsvormen, op o uitgaande, eigenlijk nooit geheel buiten gebruik
geweest, ook in de zestiende en zeventiende eeuw niet. [229]In
sommige aanzienlijke maagschappen hield men dien vorm op o
steeds in gebruik, al was het dat bij boeren, burgers en geringe
lieden de toonlooze e in plaats van die o getreden was. In Oost-
Friesland en Groningerland is deze o nooit zoo algemeen door de e
verdrongen geweest, als in Friesland bewesten Lauwers. Ook heden
nog treft men in die gewesten meer Friesche namen in hunnen
oorspronkelijk op o uitgaanden vorm aan, dan in ’t eigenlijke
Friesland. Men kan veilig de namen, op toonlooze e eindigende, in
beteren vorm herstellen door eene o de plaats van die e te doen
innemen; door bij voorbeeld van A i s e en van S i b e , van H a l b e
en van W y t s e , van R i n s e en van M i n n e , van A t s e en van
L y k e l e te maken A i s o en S i b o , H a l b o en W y t s o , R i n s o
en M i n n o of M e n n o , A t s o en L y k l o . Maar men doet beter,
men handelt in taalkundig opzicht wetenschappelijker, men bereikt in
den regel ook beter zijn doel (te weten het herstellen der namen in
zuiverder en welluidender vormen), zoo men die namen welke op tse
en le uitgaan (A t s e , F e t s e , S e a k e l e , L y k e l e , O e b e l e )
en die, gelijk op bl. 213 en vervolgens reeds is aangetoond, eigenlijk
slechts verkleinvormen zijn—eerst herstelle in den oorspronkelijken,
onverkleinden vorm, en er dan de o achter plaatse. Zoo men dus
van A t s e en F e t s e (A t - t s e en F e d - t s e , de kleine A t t e en
de kleine F e d d e ) maakt A t t o en F e d d o ; van S e a k e l e en
O e b e l e , S a c o en U b o (men spreke O e b o ). Zie hier, als
verdere voorbeelden, eenige Friesche mansnamen in den
hedendaags meest gebruikelijken, versletenen vorm, met den
oorspronkelijken Oud-Frieschen vorm er achter.

A b b e —A b b o .
A b e , A b e l e , E a b e , E a b e l e —A b o .
A d d e —A d d o .
A d e , E a d e , E d e —A d o , E d o .
A g e —A g o .
A g g e , E g g e —A g g o , E g g o .
A i k e —A i c o .
A i l k e —A i l c o .
A i s e , E i s e —A i s o , E i s o .
A l e , A l l e —A l o , A l l o .
E p p e , E p k e —E p p o , E p c o .
A t e , A t t e —A t o , A t t o .
A u k e —A u c o , A v o .
B a u w e , B a u k e —B a v o .
B o u w e , B o u k e —B u v o .
B o t e —B o t h o .
B r u i n —B r u n o .
D o e d e —D o d o .
D o e k e , D o e k e l e —D u c o , [230]in zuiverder, onverkleinden
vorm echter D o d o .
E d e —E d o .
E e l k e , E e l t j e —E e l c o ; in zuiverder, onverkleinden vorm
echter A d e l .
F e y e , F e i k e —F e y o , F e i c o .
F o k k e , F o e k e —F o c c o , F u c c o .
F o l k e —F u l c o .
H a y e , H a i k e , H a i t e , H a i t s e —H a y o , H a i c o ; de
laatste vorm is niet te verkiezen.
H e r e , H e e r e , H e a r e , H j e r r e —H e r o .
O e d s —O d o , U d o (spreek O e d o ).
O e n e —O n n o , U n o (spreek O e n o ).
P o p p e , P o p k e —P o p p o , P o p c o ; de laatste vorm is
niet te verkiezen.
S a k e , S a k e l e , S e k e l e , S e a k e l e —S a c o .
Ta k e , Te a k e , Te k e , Te k e l e , Te a k e l e —Ta c o .
S c h e l t e —S c e l t o .
S o l k e —S o l c o .
Ta d e , Te a d e —Ta d o .
T i e d e , T i e t e , T j i t t e , T j i t s e —T h i e d o of T h e o d o .
S i b e , S i b b e , S i p p e , S i p k e , S i b b e l e —S i b o ,
Sibbo.
 W i b e —W i b o .
U i l k e , U i l t j e , U i l t z e n —U l o .
W i t e , W i t t e , W y t s e —W i t o .
W o b b e , W o p , W o p k e —W u b b o .

Van deze soort van eenvoudige, zoogenoemde stamnamen zijn

H a y o , H u g o , O n n o , O t t o , M e n n o , B e n n o , enz.
steeds in gebruik geweest, ook bij de andere volksstammen in de
Nederlanden en Duitschland.

Geheel in overeenstemming met de bovengenoemde mansnamen

kan men de toonlooze e, waarop vele hedendaagsch Friesche
vrouwennamen eindigen, veranderen in eene a. Die namen
herkrijgen daar door veelal hunnen ouden, oorspronkelijken vorm, en
worden tevens welluidender en aannemelijker. Zoo kan men van
Te t , Te t t e of Te t s j e maken Te t t a , van A t h of A t s j e A t t a ,
en M i n n a van M i n k e of M i n t s j e .

De Friesche vrouwennamen komen heden ten dage meest in

verkleinvormen voor; gaan dus veelal op je, tje, kje, ke uit. Zoo men
deze onnoodige, meestal leelijke verkleinvormen eerst van de
namen afneemt, en dan eene a voegt achter den overblijvenden
[231]naamsstam, dan verkrijgt men in den regel den oorspronkelijken
vorm van den naam. Zoo men dus van Y t s j e of I t s j e (eigenlijk
I d - t j e of Y d - t j e ) den verkleinvorm tje wegneemt, en achter den
overblijvenden naamsstam I d of Y d eene a voegt, is de naam in
zijnen oorspronkelijken en schoonen vorm I d a hersteld.

Zie hier, als verdere voorbeelden, eenige Friesche vrouwennamen in

den hedendaags meest gebruikelijken vorm, met den
oorspronkelijken Oud-Frieschen vorm daar achter.
D e t j e —D e d d a .
E l s k e , E l s j e —E l s a .
F r o u k j e —F r o u w a , F r o w a ; de laatste is de beste vorm.
H e i l t j e —H e i l a .
H i l t j e , H i k k e , H y l t j e , H y l k j e , H i k e —H i l d a .
H o u k j e , H o l k j e —H o l d a .
Y n s k j e —I n a .
J e l t j e , J e i k e —J e l l a .
B o n t j e —B o n n a .
B o t j e —B o t h a .
M e i n t j e —M e i n a ; in den alleroudsten vorm M e g i n a of
Magina.
F e t j e , (F e d - t j e )—F e d d a .
F o k j e , F o e k j e , F o k e l t j e —F o c c a , F u c c a , F o c a .
Y m k j e , I m k j e , E m k j e —I m a , I m m a , E m m a .
E a d s k e , A t j e —A d a .
R e i n t j e —R e i n a ; in den alleroudsten vorm R e g i n a of
R a g i n a , waarbij men echter niet aan het Latijnsche woord
regina (koningin) te denken hebbe.
G e e s j e , G e e s k e —G e s a . De meer bijzonder Oud-
Duitsche vorm G i s e l a (ook een verkleinvorm), kan ook zeer
wel in de plaats van G e e s k e genomen worden.
E p k j e , E p j e —E p p a .
A a f k e —A v a .
D o e t j e (d.i. D o e d - t j e ), D o e k j e , D o e k e l t j e —D o d a .
D o u t j e , D o u w t s e n —D u v a .
D i e u w k e , D i e u w e r t j e —D i u v a , D i e t w a r a ,
Thiadware.
H a i t s k e , H a i k j e , H a i t j e —H a y a .
G e e l t j e , G e a l t j e —G e l a .
H i t j e (H i d - t j e )—H i d d a .
T i e t j e —T h i e d a of T h e o d a .
De namen A d a , E m m a , I d a zijn van ouds her ook bij andere
Germaansche volken buiten Friesland in gebruik gebleven. De
meeste overigen hebben alleen de Friezen behouden. [232]

Ten slotte nog geef ik hier eene lijst van Friesche persoonsnamen in
hunnen hedendaagschen, verbasterden en verkleinden vorm, met
de oude, oorspronkelijke, volle vormen daar achter. De letters m en v
achter de namen duiden aan of zij mans- of vrouwennamen zijn.

A a r t , A r e n t , A a n m.—A r n of ook A r n o l d .
A l g e r . m.—A d e l g a r .
A l l e r t . m.—A d e l h a r t .
A n d e l e . m.—A n d o .
A a f j e , A a f k e . v.—A v a of ook A b a .
A a l t j e . v.—A d e l a .
A n s k e . m.—A n s o .
A u k e . m.—A u d o , A u c o of A v o .
A u k j e . v.—A u d a of A v a .
B e a n , B a a r t , B e e r t , B e r e n d , B a r e n d , m.—
Bernhard.
B a a r t j e , B a a t j e , B e r e n d j e (B e r e n d i n a ). v.—
Bernharda.
B a u w e . m.—B a v o .
B a u k j e , B a a i e . v.—B a v a .
B a r t e l e , B a r t l e . m.—B a r t of B r e c h t en B a r t h o l d .
B a r t e l t j e , B a r t j e , B r e c h t j e , v.—B a r t h a of
B e r t h a , of B r e c h t a en B a r t h o l d a .
B o u w e . m.—B u v o .
B o u k j e . v.—B u v a .
B i n n e , B i n s e , B e n t e , m.—B e n n o .
Bentje, Benskje, Bints, Binke, Bintje,
B i n t s k e , v.—B e n n a .
B e n n e r t , B i n n e r t . m.—B e r n h a r d .