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THE HOBBY/McDougal 1

All human beings are limbs of each other,


Having been created of one essence.
When time afflicts a limb with pain,
The other limbs cannot at rest remain.
If thou feel not for other’s misery,
A human being is no name for thee.
Sa’adi, Persian poet, 1210-1290

Chapter One

Killing someone is an extraordinarily simple act. For instance, it’s much

easier to accomplish than it is to perfect a good tennis back hand. Particularly if you

are a killer who lacks any sense of compunction. Can you shoot a snake? Or a rabid

wolf? Then you should be able to kill someone who deserves that fate. I’m not

talking humans with souls here. I’m talking vicious animals who think they’re

human. However, pulling off the perfect murder is another matter. I ought to know.

I’ve done it nearly two dozen times, even though I am a quite ordinary fellow. Well,

perhaps not ordinary. Actually, I’m really good at it. Most people who attempt it are

not.

Consider Roswell “Ros” Gorman. He was a terrible practioner of the art.

Well, in truth, it was the part about getting away with it at which he was not very

good. He should have been assigned to a witless protection program. Besides being

stupid, he was evil through and through, almost always a lethal combination. To
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comprehend the wickedness that permeated Roswell Gorman’s soul you must know

something of his victims. I did.

A house painter by trade, Ros had done work for Mrs. Wilma Cordery, a

wealthy and attractive fifty-five year old widow. Wilma was a woman who had

fared well in life by marrying a man destined to become wealthy. Frederick Cordery

had started in business as a sewing machine salesman. In order to perfect his sales

pitch, he had become adept at tailoring. At first he sewed modest garments. Later,

he began to produce women’s blouses and suits with a certain flair that brought him

to the attention of the retail trade. As his business prospered, his wife assisted in the

promotion of the business. She suggested the motto that became famous. “Look

smart, dress smart, be smart.” After Fred died, she sold the enterprise for eleven

million dollars. She was a good, honest, decent capitalist.

When Roswell Gorman was hired to paint the upstairs rooms at Wilma’s, he

discovered a safe in one of the bedroom closets. He painted around it, but didn’t

forget it. As a matter of fact, he thought of little else for the next two weeks. Over

the course of several evenings at the Pastime Lounge on Greenville Avenue, he

perfected a strategy with his friend and fellow house painter, Arthur Schoen. Art

was full of doubt at 6.p.m. each time they met, but by ten he was usually drunk

enough to believe they could steal anything they wanted. Fortunately for Arthur,

Ros decided to perpetrate the robbery at midday on a Thursday. Schoen was stone

cold sober and disinclined to want to return to prison, where he had previously

spent an unhappy two years, much of the time bent over at the waist, ostensibly
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trying to pick up a bar of soap. Consequently, he turned down Roswell’s offer to

share Mrs. Cordery’s wealth.

The day of the crime, Roswell parked his pickup truck on the circular gravel

driveway in front of Wilma Cordery’s mansion in the upscale Dallas suburb of

Highland Park. Paint bucket and brush in hand, he rang the doorbell. When Mrs.

Cordery answered, he said he had returned to perform a follow up check on his

paint job. If there were any places that needed touching up, he was there to take

care of them.

Mrs. Cordery invited him into the house. As she closed the door, Gorman

pulled a large hunting knife from his pocket and after setting down the paint bucket

and brush he grabbed Wilma from behind. He forced her to accompany him up the

stairs to the room where the safe was located. The excitement of the moment caused

Gorman to delay checking the safe. He decided instead to rape Wilma Cordery,

which he proceeded to do twice. Wilma’s resistance slowed considerably when

Roswell slugged her in the face, breaking her jaw. After he had taught her this

lesson regarding who was boss, he forced her to open the safe. He removed

approximately $20 thousand in jewelry and $1,800 in cash. Since he knew Mrs.

Cordery could identify him, he slit her throat and left her to die. As he turned from

her body, he heard a noise from an adjoining room. He went to check on the sound

and found little Jessica Cordery, Wilma’s three-year-old granddaughter. The child

smiled at him and showed him her dolly. He hit her viciously and lifted her up. He

carried her into the bathroom, where he upended her into the toilet and held her
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head under the water until she drowned. His elimination of witnesses gave him a

false sense of confidence.

Roswell figured that the jewelry would be too hot to pawn in Dallas, so he

drove thirty miles to Fort Worth, where he pawned the lot for $850. The Dallas

police found it within three days. The owner of New World Pawn had turned

Roswell in for the $30,000 reward that the family had posted.

His pal, Arthur Schoen, did likewise. Art and the pawnbroker eventually

split the money. The police arrested Roswell at the Pastime lounge, where he was

spending money like a drunken house painter. Roswell copped a plea to avoid a

trial. For a sentence of twenty-to-life, he agreed to take care of all of his past

business, which included seven rapes and a homicide committed two years before in

Mexia, Texas. The Mexia killing was the result of a drunken argument with a bar

patron regarding the pronunciation of Mexia. Locals called it muh-hay-yuh.

Roswell, ever the dumbass, insisted it was pronounced mex-ee-yuh. A bet of twenty

dollars was made. When Roswell lost, he beat the winner with a beer bottle,

rendering him unconscious and within a few hours, dead. He left town quickly,

never to return.

Twenty-three years later, Gorman was paroled conditionally. This event was

chronicled in the Dallas Morning News, in the Metropolitan Section. The handle on

the story dealt with interviews of Wilma Cordery’s friends and relatives. Without

exception, they were all highly pissed off.

I did not know Wilma, but I was also outraged by what I had read. You see,

I’m in the justice dispensing business, on a freelance basis. I’m a serial executioner.
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My service is not a state sanctioned enterprise, but is probably appreciated by some

as much as if it were. Don’t get the wrong impression. A serial executioner is

differentiated from a serial killer by the nature of his choice of subjects. The classic

serial killer usually victimizes innocents, generally to live out some sick sexual

fantasy. An executioner, on the other hand, puts to death only those people who

have earned that fate. All of my subjects have been men and women who deserved

what I deemed to be appropriate justice. Though I am quite good at my…hobby,

modesty prevents me from taking a bow. But please imagine that I have.

Last year, I took early retirement from the bench, where I had served as a

Texas judge for ten years. It was soon after that that I took up my new found

vocation, which might be euphemistically described as an elimination service.

Being Judge Duncan Travis in a small claims/misdemeanor court for ten years had

taken its toll. I was sick of whiny litigants, stupid defendants and smarmy lawyers. I

wanted out. At fifty-three I retain most of what had once been a handsome face. I’m

no Russell Crowe, but some call me distinguished looking. I have the bearing of

one whom people trust, deservedly or not.

As a participant in the legal system, I have come to believe there are almost

no successful rehabilitations of murderers, rapists or child molesters. I am

convinced that nearly all will commit crimes again.

I’m not in this for fun or profit. I’m not a soldier of an avenging God. If

anything, I’m you. Would you not defend your life or your family’s life against a

mad dog? Well, sir or madam, perhaps you won’t have to if I do it for you, in a

preemptive sort of way. And it’s not a racial thing. I am biased only against evil
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people. When I was in ‘Nam, John Houser, a black corporal, gave me his sure-fire

racist test. He asked, “If you had a choice, at age fifty, would you, a white man,

rather be a handsome, intelligent, well-to-do, twenty-five year old black man? If

you have to think that over before you make your decision, you are probably a little

bit racist.” For me, it had been a no-brainer. Black is beautiful.

But back to Gorman. A call to a friend in a constable’s office in Dallas

County got me Gorman’s address. The parolee was to reside in a halfway house for

a period of two years. The usual complement of idiots in the system had judged him

rehabilitated. He was deemed to be a “model prisoner.” Ironically, he had been by

following the example of Arthur Schoen, performing modeling duties in prison. He

was forced to model a revealing frock in the shower room whenever it suited some

of the more aggressive inmates. As he aged, he was gradually released from that

duty.

The halfway house at 1613 Mulberry Lane in Dallas was not a house. It was

a seedy apartment complex with even sleazier tenants. It contained more dashed

hopes and broken dreams than you could find in a bank loan officer’s file cabinet.

All of the residents were criminals. Within a five-block area surrounding the

Majestic Apartments lived many more crooks, for the moment uncaught. It was a

very bad neighborhood.

The Majestic had thirty-six units. Thirty-five of them housed two former

inmates each. Apartment number one was where Harmon Leftwich, the House

Manager, resided. He was a contract employee of the State Board of Pardons and

Paroles. He had a staff of two who supposedly kept track of the parolees in
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residence. Roswell Gorman was assigned this abode upon his release from

incarceration. It was conveniently on a bus line, since most of the men living there

did not have their own transportation.

Roswell sought employment in a desultory manner. If a job were to fall in

his lap he vowed to his P.O. that he would accept it. He checked the halfway house

bulletin board daily, but alas, nothing appeared which suited his talents, i.e., house

painter, wine taster or aging gigolo.

A week after Roswell had moved into the halfway house I bought a

disposable cell phone at a mall in Arlington and tucked it away in my pocket. The

next morning I parked two blocks from The Majestic and meandered toward it. I

carried with me a stack of flyers that I had run off on my computer’s printer. They

advertised a fast food chicken place, located nearby. I entered the halfway house

and pinned one of the ads to the bulletin board. I also tacked on a small four by five

card. “Professional house painter wanted. Mr. Wilson. 555-4432.” If anyone noticed

me they would remember only a guy handing out broadsheets.

Someone named Victor Juarez called the next day. I told him I would get

back to him later. An hour after that, Gorman the painter called. Bingo. I made

arrangements to pick Roswell up in front of the Majestic at ten the next morning.

We were to go to the job site, where he was to give me an estimate of the cost of

painting. He was sitting on the curb when I arrived.

Gorman had not aged very well. His once youthful slimness had

deteriorated. A too-tight t-shirt revealed a fat paunch .His gray thinning hair was

combed back, held in place by a rubber-banded ponytail. A wispy moustache


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drifted across his upper lip. His face was pocked badly, as though he had received

treatments from an acupuncturist on crack. A pack of Marlboros was rolled up in

his left sleeve. He still wore prison issue jeans.

When he saw my car stop he got up and meandered over, leaning on the

windowsill on the passenger side. Resting on his elbows, he squinted at me and

asked, “You Wilson?”

I answered, “Yeah. You’re Gorman?”

“That’s me.”

I said, “Get in. I’ll take you out to the site.”

He opened the door and slid into the passenger seat. We headed toward the

North Central Expressway. I said, “The place is up in Collin County. Relax. We’ve

got about forty-five minutes of driving.”

He asked, “Mind if I smoke?”

I said, “No, it’s okay. Keep your window cracked.”

After a few minutes of silence, Roswell asked, “Do you know that the

Majestic is a half-way house for cons?”

I answered, “Yeah, I know.”

“So, why are you hiring an ex-con? Don’t that bother you, just a little bit?”

I smiled in his direction. “I pulled a deuce for breaking and entering when I

was a kid. I had to work like hell to get over that. I even legally changed my name.

So, that’s me. What were you in for?”

I expected him to lie and he did. “Armed robbery. Mostly 7-11’s. For a

couple of months I made more from those stores than the stockholders did.”
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“That’s funny. How did you get nailed?”

“The cops had a roving shotgun squad assigned to convenience stores. They

waited in the backroom. I picked the wrong store.”

I figured Roswell had picked up that story in prison. I remembered when the

Dallas cops actually did that. They killed two felons on two successive nights. They

finally stopped when the criminal lobby pointed out that the police were skipping

around the court system, acting as judge, jury and executioner. Most folks thought

that was a sensible, time saving device. The Dallas chapter of the ACLU and the

City Council didn’t.

I had a nine-millimeter Glock fitted with a silencer in a holster fastened to

the left side of the driver’s seat. To fit a silencer to a pistol requires the installation

of a new special longer barrel. If I used the weapon during a job, I would toss the

barrel but keep the frame and silencer. A new barrel was all I needed to be ready for

the next encounter. Consequently, the lands and grooves were always different from

each barrel. I also disposed of my brass carefully. Weapons forensics could never

get a handle on me. The choice of a Glock was intentional because it is a popular

weapon with police departments. Since all of my subjects were bad guys, anyone

working the case(s) might get the idea that someone on the job might have taken the

scumbag out. A red herring here and there couldn’t hurt.

As we drove north, I began to anticipate what was to come. I wanted to see

the shock in his face, then the fear and the groveling. I wanted him to experience

red fear in his heart. I wanted his bowels to loosen. I wanted him to plead and beg.
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The one thing I did not care, or expect, to hear from him was an apology or

remorse.

About two miles from McKinney, I took a farm road. A mile down that, I

turned onto a gravel road that ran through an area of chaparral and mesquite.

Roswell groused, “Man, this place is sure as hell way out in the boonies.

You know, I ain’t got no car. If we make a deal, somebody gonna have to fetch me

every day.”

I said, “No sweat. I’ve got a company van. You can use it.”

Within a few minutes, I saw the creaking, rusted windmill I had been

looking for. I pulled the car over onto the shoulder of the road and stopped. “Might

have a low tire. I’m gonna check.”

Gorman shrugged and lit another cigarette.

I took the keys and opened the door and slipped the Glock from its holster. I

walked around the back of the vehicle, keeping the pistol hidden from view. I faked

checking out the right rear tire. I yelled, “Come take a look at this.”

He opened the door and got out and saw the Glock aimed at his belly. “Hey,

man, don’t point that damn thing at me. It might go off.”

I gestured with the pistol toward the roadside brush. “If you don’t do what I

tell you to, you might be right. Let’s take a little walk.”

“What the hell. Why do you want to go out there?”

“You’ll see. Now, move it.”

“Hey, man, I never did nothing to you. What’s this all about?”
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I said, “This is not about me. It’s about you. Now, get moving or, by God, I

really will shoot you.”

He stumbled toward a break between two mesquites. A barbed wire fence

blocked our path. I said, “Climb through. When you get through, sit down, facing

away from me.” I didn’t want him to try to make a run for it. He did as he was told.

After I got through the fence, I told him to stand.

We walked about fifty yards into the scrub, until we came upon a small

clearing where the windmill was. There was a small circular stock tank adjacent to

the mill. It was open at the top and consisted of three-foot tall corrugated metal

sections, held in place by metal fence posts. A blue vinyl liner made it impervious

to leaks. The tank was full of water, fed by a mill-operated pump. Dried cow patties

were scattered on the ground around the area. A float valve kept the surface of the

water about four inches below the upper edge of the tank. We were well hidden

from the road.

I said, “Okay, this’ll do.” I ordered, “Sit on the ground, Gorman.”

He looked as though he were about to try to escape. I said, “Don’t go for it.

You wouldn’t get three feet.”

He sat abruptly and blubbered, “Don’t hurt me. Whatever has you pissed

off, I can make it right. Please, man, please.”

I commanded, “Shut up.” He did.

After a couple of minutes he began to calm down. Then I asked, “Do you

remember Wilma Cordery, and her granddaughter, Jessica?”


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There was instant recognition in his eyes, but he lied. “No. Never heard of

them.”

You don’t forget the people you murder, particularly when you do a quarter

of a century behind bars for the crime. I said sternly, “I’m going to ask you again,

and if you lie again, I’m going to shoot you in the balls. Do you remember them or

not?”

He stammered, “Yeah, I know who they are…were. But I’m square on that.

I done my time. All that’s over, now.”

I shook my head. “No, Gorman, it’s not over. You’ll never be square with

that, not in a million years. You raped that woman, cut her throat and drowned that

sweet little girl in the toilet. In the toilet, for God’s sake! How could you think you

were even-up on that?”

“Well, the law says I am.”

“The law? You say, the law? Why, you asshole, you never paid attention to

the law in your entire lousy life. Don’t talk to me about the law. Let me tell you

about the law. Out here in these mesquites, I am the law. I am the sheriff, the judge

and the executioner.”

He began to cry as his head shook back.

I asked, “Do you have anything to say?”

He didn’t reply. I pulled a roll of duct tape from my pocket. I stood behind

him. “Put your hands in your pockets, Roswell.” I wrapped his torso with the tape,

locking his arms tightly at his side. I put a few turns around his ankles to deter him

from running.
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I said, “We are going to be out here for a while. You will need to drink some

water or the sun will kill you.”

I pulled him to his feet and dragged him to the edge of the tank. I

commanded, “Drink.”

As he bent to the water, I grabbed his legs and upended him into the pool.

He struggled futilely to get his head above the surface. Finally, I jerked him upright.

He was gasping, a watery foam running out of his nose.

I pulled his head back by his ponytail and whispered into his ear, “This is

how little Jessica felt, you son of a bitch. You showed her no mercy. Well, here’s

your reward.”

He got out a gurgling scream as I pushed him down again. He tried to hold

his breath, not an easy task for a smoker. Before long, bubbles began to rise to the

surface. I held him under for five minutes, until all of the twitching stopped. I

pulled him out again and removed the tape. Then I dumped his body into the tank.

When society metes out retribution, it does so without imagination. I don’t. I

believe the punishment should fit the crime. That day, it did.

On the way home, I swung by the halfway house and removed the

employee-wanted card. That night, my shoes, the wadded up tape and the cell

phone all made their way to the bottom of the Trinity River.

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 14

Chapter Two

My wife, Dori, died of breast cancer six years ago. She was only forty-three.

The enormity of my loss was almost too much to bear. There was such a sense of

injustice about it, a sensation of unfairness so huge, that I was sent into a profound

depression. For much of our married life, we had struggled to get by. Dori was

determined to make us succeed. She had worked as a secretary in an oil company

while I struggled to make it on my own in a small electronics business. More than

once, her paychecks had paid my business’s rent. Through good times and bad, her

optimism never faltered.

Ten years ago that hopefulness paid off. A small patent I held attracted a

buyout by a semiconductor company. I netted two and a half million dollars. Dori

and I had been active as volunteers in party politics so, more or less on a lark, I ran

for public office and was elected a Republican Justice of the Peace in Dallas

County. In Texas, being a lawyer is not a requirement to serve as a justice of the

peace and I am not one. In fact, since that level of the judiciary is often referred to

as ‘the people’s court,’ it’s actually considered an asset not to be an attorney when

running for the post. My winning smile won. The fact that the J.P. Precinct was

bulletproof Republican probably had more to do with it than my grin. But I had

evolved into a politician quickly, so I believed more in me than in numbers.

I enjoyed serving as a J.P. I had two jurisdictions, a civil docket with

jurisdiction up to $5,000 and a misdemeanor docket covering traffic citations, hot

checks and truancy. During my time in office, I also performed over 2,000 wedding
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ceremonies. Some of these were more than unusual. One I remember in particular

was a Hispanic wedding. I performed many of those as I was able to do them in

Spanish. Se hablo amor. When I arrived at the designated home, I was given a seat

of honor in the living room while we waited for the bride to make her appearance.

As I sat there a cute little girl, about six years old, came and sat beside me. As was

my style, I was wearing a black suit and was carrying a bible. The kid stared at me

for a long moment and then asked, “Are you God?” I smiled beatifically at her and

answered in a somewhat sonorous tone, “No, I’m not God.” She hesitated a few

seconds and then said, “Well, you look like God.” So, if you ever wondered what

God looks like, it’s me.

Somehow, staying in public office after Dori’s death lost its appeal. She had

enjoyed my success as much as I had, and jokingly referred to herself as “Mrs.

Judge.” Her loss, more than anything else, precipitated my stepping off the bench.

Acceptance of loss comes with time. And it’s strange that as the months and years

have passed, I have forgotten almost all of Dori’s faults and remember mostly our

good times together. I loved my wife a lot, most of the time. Sometimes, not as

much. And on rare occasions, I wondered what a divorce lawyer would charge.

Now though, a half-dozen years later, I am delighted that I opted to leave

office when I did. Had I not, I would have probably never taken up the hobby that

has transformed my life and helped lift me from my state of melancholy. My new

vocation is more exciting than anything I have ever done before. It is unlikely that

God will ask me to write an addition to the Old Testament. If he did, though, The

Book of Duncan would include these verses.


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“The strong must protect the weak.”

“Good men must vanquish evil men. If a good man does not, some of the

evil shall stain his own soul.”

“To kill an evil man is to save those upon whom the evil man would

eventually wreak his havoc.”

For me, the prospect of killing men is not daunting. I am a Vietnam veteran.

I was a gunner in a gun truck squad. In the well in the rear of the deuce and a half

truck was mounted an electrically operated swiveling turret. On the turret were four

.50 caliber machine guns. Originally designed as an anti-aircraft unit, it was actually

used much more for ground support. On more than one occasion we faced large

groups of North Vietnamese and Viet Cong troops. We left hundreds of them dead.

Not many infantry troops could stand against thousands of high caliber rounds

cutting through their ranks like a scythe. I knew that many of the enemy had been

pressed into service just as I, a draftee, had been. I supposed that many of them did

not want to be there any more than I did. But I slaughtered them anyway. They had

mothers, wives, sweethearts. Eventually, that was not something upon which I spent

a lot of thought. I rationalized that I couldn’t go over the hill because the other side

of that mountain was 11,000 miles and an ocean away. But it seemed to me that

they could desert with ease. Their hooch was next door. If they stayed in the battle

and tried to kill me, then I didn’t give a shit what happened to them. In the time I

served, dozens of enemy dead became scores, which became hundreds. I remember

that the first time, I had fired out of fear. Later it was out of revenge. Finally it

became automatic, to survive until rotation day. Duty became but a small issue.
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And now, for six years I have fought a new war, dispensing justice to those

who managed to avoid it the first time around. Mine is much more appropriate and

is certainly not the inadequate justice that had previously been meted out to them

by stupid juries or bleeding heart judges.

I expect to make it to some sort of Heaven when I cash in. Probably on the

back row, but I’m fairly certain I’ll be there.

To date, I have dispatched twenty-one to Hell. Escaping detection has been

made easy because law enforcement really hasn’t tried very hard, if at all, to find

out who killed them. Lawmen simply didn’t give a shit about those mutts.

That is, until recently. I hit a speed bump on the road to number twenty-two.

But more about that later. What immediately follows is an accurate accounting of a

few more of my successes. They are not listed in chronological order.

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


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Chapter Three

Idaho is a land with more than a few iconoclasts. The western versions of

nutty homeless persons are the survivalists and the latter day mountain men who

live off the land, poaching deer and elk and on occasion, protected species. Most

have no respect for the law. In many instances, they follow commandments that

they make up as they go along. When arrested or sued, their writs are as goofy as

any documents ever presented in any court, full of idiotic suppositions and facts that

never were.

Waldo Greenhill was one of these. At twenty-eight, he had already lived in

the woods for six years. Prior to that he had performed odd jobs, never lasting more

than a few months at any of them. Waldo’s problem was that he simply couldn’t

abide authority. This led inexorably to regular stays in various Idaho and Oregon

jails, mostly for fighting while drunk. One time, a judge in Klamath Falls, Oregon,

gave him a choice. Two years in prison for felony assault, or join the Marines. He

was to report back to court in a week to make his decision known. That was the last

Klamath Falls saw of Waldo. To his credit, he had gone by the Marine recruiting

office. He knew they worked with guns. While they were explaining why his police

record was a disqualifier, he angrily threw a chair through the plate glass storefront

and took off.

Eventually, he moved away from society and became a forest recluse. He

staked out a claim to a spot in the Sawtooth Wilderness Area in Idaho, where he

lived mostly off the lean of the land, there being precious little fat. He had become
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gaunt, with a full beard and long, matted hair. He affected the manner and dress of a

mountain man, wearing home sewn, fringed buckskins. He wore a fur hat in the

winter and fleece-lined boots, made from sheepskin. The hides were from sheep he

killed and stole from valley ranchers. He was clever enough to make it look like the

work of wolves.

He had constructed a log framework over which he had draped a surplus

army tent. A circle of rocks in the center of the floor was his fireplace. Directly

above that was a webbed smokehole in the top of the canvas abode. On several trees

ringing the clearing in which he lived he had nailed crude signs that read, “Stay the

hell out. Private property. Proceed at your own risk.”

The site was actually quite beautiful, surrounded by Douglas fir trees. A

small stream cut through the edge of the area. It was lined with chokecherry bushes

and Idaho swordferns. About twenty yards upstream, there was a small ten-foot

waterfall. It fell into a pool of icy water. The small pond was the home to

undersized brook trout. Waldo found them large enough to eat, however. During the

summer months, Waldo cultivated marijuana interspersed among the chokecherries.

In the early fall each year, he packed two large bales of weed onto a wheeled travois

and hiked down to Stanley, Idaho, where his contacts were. He converted his cash

crop into enough money to buy supplies for the coming year. These he lugged back

into the wilderness on the travois.

His campsite wasn’t private property, of course. But Waldo had somehow

convinced himself that if he lived there five years he could claim a right of

homestead. This was a self-written statute that sounded good to Waldo. Like
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everything else he did, it seemed that he had heard of or read about such a law

somewhere.

Greenhill was poor in cash, but rich in guns and ammunition. He had a

Remington .30 caliber rifle, a Winchester .12 gauge pump shotgun and two .38

revolvers. He shot anything on four legs that was edible. Upstream about a quarter

of a mile from his camp Waldo kept salt blocks, which he had stolen from ranchers

near Stanley. Deer and elk loved the stuff. Waldo would wait there, downwind,

when he was hunting. Most of the time he didn’t have to wait long.

Paradise began to unravel for Greenhill in June of 1990 when a young,

backpacking couple chanced upon his encampment. There was an altercation when

the young people took exception to Waldo’s claim that he owned the property and

that he would shoot them as trespassers if they didn’t leave. He actually fired a

warning shot at them and they left rapidly. They made their way back to their Volvo

and then to the ranger station in Twin Falls, where they filed a complaint. Chief

Ranger Arthur Constantine had already heard from other hikers about Waldo’s

transgressions, but this was the first report of him using a firearm. He decided to go

up Rocky Creek to Greenhill’s encampment and lay down the law. He would offer

to let the threat to the couple slide, but he would demand that Waldo break camp

and clear out.

The following day, he and Ranger Kate Stackbole drove to the foot of

Aspen Trail, which roughly followed Rocky Creek. They parked their Jeep there

and headed up the trace. They both carried holstered .45 automatics. That was a

new addition to their equipment. When Constantine first became a ranger twenty-
THE HOBBY/McDougal 21

five years before, his duties were primarily to assist visitors and to care for the flora

and fauna. More and more, he had to assume the duties of a policeman. He didn’t

like this new role and he was looking forward to retirement because of it.

The following has been reconstructed from eyewitness accounts and

court records.

It was a beautiful, crisp morning. Even though it was already summer, the

rangers’ breath fogged out as they labored up the trail. They came upon Waldo in a

small meadow about a quarter mile south of his place. He was in the act of flensing

the hide off of a young doe. His arms were bloody. The buzz of flies was audible in

the quiet of the woods. His rifle was propped against a boulder next to him.

Constantine and Stackbole drew up short. The Chief Ranger asked, “You

would be Waldo Greenhill?”

Waldo stood up straight from his task and asked in return, “Who wants to

know?”

Constantine said, “I’m Chief Ranger Arthur Constantine and this is Ranger

Kate Stackbole. We’ve got business with you, if you’re Greenhill.”

Waldo replied belligerently, “Well, I’m him, but I don’t believe we have

anything to talk about.”

Constantine said, “Look, Greenhill, you are squatting in this area against

federal law. And you’ve killed that deer illegally. You’ve also fired on people who
THE HOBBY/McDougal 22

have accosted you. I’m willing to let all that skate, but you’re going to have to clear

out of here within twenty-four hours. Do you understand?”

Waldo picked up his rifle. He said, “That’s bullshit. This here is my land.

I’ve met the homestead requirement and I’m not leaving.”

Ranger Stackbole spoke, “There is no homestead law which applies to a

federal wilderness area. You’re mistaken.”

Waldo snarled at her, “Shut up, bitch. Us men are talking. You stay the hell

out of this.”

Constantine knew that Kate was hot-tempered. Before she could reply, he

said, “Waldo, we don’t want any trouble. Are you going to leave here or not?”

Waldo replied, “Not.”

“Then you are under arrest, for unlawful trespass and poaching. Lay down

that weapon and put your hands behind your head.”

Kate unsnapped her holster and drew her pistol as Constantine walked

toward the troublemaker. Waldo fired his Remington from the hip. The first shot hit

Constantine in the chest. The second destroyed the top half of his head. He fell

forward, dead before he hit the ground. Shot number three slammed into

Stackbole’s left forearm. She returned fire and hit Waldo in his right kneecap, a

shot that undoubtedly saved her life. Greenhill staggered toward her, firing several

shots wildly.

Kate Stackbole was bleeding profusely and needed to apply a tourniquet.

Waldo Greenhill could barely stand, but was still deadly. It was obvious there was

nothing to be done for her partner. Her best bet was to retreat, which she did. She
THE HOBBY/McDougal 23

scrambled back down the trail to her Jeep. Luckily, she had been the driver earlier,

so the vehicle’s keys were in her pocket. She guessed correctly that Greenhill was

not following her, but was tending to his wound.

At the Jeep, she hurriedly wrapped an Ace bandage from her first aid kit

around her upper arm, twisting it to stanch the flow of blood. Driving with one

hand, she radioed the Blaine County sheriff’s office in Hailey and made

arrangement for deputies to meet her at the Saint Luke Wood River Medical Center

in Ketchum. They were waiting for her when she arrived.

While she received medical attention for her wound, she brought the sheriff

up to speed.

“Greenhill is nuts. He shot Arthur without warning. It’s only by the grace of

God that I’m not lying dead up there as well. Now he’s like a wounded bear. He

isn’t going to come out of there easy.”

Sheriff Demonte reminded Kate of Jimmy Stewart. Even though she was

fifteen years younger, she wouldn’t have turned him down for a dinner date. He

spread a topographical map out on a stand next to the gurney where Kate was

sitting. “Show me where his camp is. I’ll radio the State Police and get one of their

helicopters up there. We’ll put men in the vicinity and see if the ‘copter can flush

him out.”

She marked the map where she believed the camp to be. She also pinpointed

the location of Constantine’s body. She said, “Waldo isn’t going far on that leg,

even with a homemade crutch. My advice is when you catch up with him, you shoot
THE HOBBY/McDougal 24

him before he shoots you. He’s a mean lowlife snake. He doesn’t deserve a

warning.”

Sheriff Demonte said, “Thanks for the advice, Kate, but you know we can’t

do that. We’ll get him without firing if we can. You take care of that arm and get set

to testify at his trial.”

He squeezed her free hand and said, “Damn good work.”

It took three days to corner Greenhill. The searchers had pushed him into a

box canyon a couple of miles west of Rocky Creek, at the headwaters of a small

tributary stream. When the helicopter pilot pinpointed his location, Sheriff

Demonte, heading a posse of his deputies and park personnel, demanded over a

bullhorn that Greenhill surrender. By then, Waldo’s leg was throbbing with intense

pain. He had a choice. Suicide by cop or give it up. Like most bullies, when faced

with really bad odds, he opted for self-preservation. He surrendered and was taken

to the same hospital where Kate Stackbole had been treated and released.

Since the crime had been perpetrated in a National Wilderness Area, Waldo

was turned over to federal authorities. After his release from the medical center, he

was held in the Bannock County Jail in Pocatello until his trial date in the federal

court.

Waldo’s court appointed lawyer was Fred Bessemer, a young hotshot who

made up for his lack of experience by being smart as hell. The U.S. Attorney

assigned to prosecute was Barbara Samuelson, equally smart and very experienced.

She had tried nearly twenty murder cases and had won ninety percent.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 25

Bessemer’s strategy was to present Waldo as a desperate man who had acted

in self-defense. It didn’t hurt his case that Kate Stackbole had actually shot a

marijuana cultivator the summer before. After that her nickname in the valley was

Killer Kate. Fred Bessemer also cleaned up Waldo. A haircut and shave, a new suit

and an innocent demeanor were established to appeal to the women on the jury.

And charm them he did. There was more eye contact between Waldo and the

female jurors than you would ever find between a rattlesnake and a group of field

mice.

Bessemer very nearly made the case that the rangers had meant to kill

Waldo. Kate admitted on the stand that even though Chief Ranger Arthur

Constantine had not drawn his weapon during the arrest, she had.

Barbara Samuelson asked Kate, “Did you really feel it was necessary to

draw your weapon?”

Kate replied, “He had already indicated he was going to resist arrest. He had

a rifle in his hands. Damn right I felt it was necessary. And then, when he shot

Arthur, that proved I was right.”

When Bessemer cross-examined, he asked, “Isn’t it true, Ranger Stackbole,

that you shouted at Mr. Greenhill that you already had one notch on your gun and

you wouldn’t mind having another?”

Kate replied, “Absolutely not. This isn’t the wild west.”

Bessemer asked, “But isn’t it true, Ranger, that you shot an alleged

marijuana farmer last year and that you actually do have a notch carved into the

handle of your pistol?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 26

Kate’s jaw clenched and her lips whitened. She hesitated too long for

credibility and finally answered, “Yes.”

Bessemer tilted his head in a quizzical manner and asked his final questions.

“Would you agree, Ranger Stackbole, that the placement of the first notch on the

handle of a weapon actually anticipates the placement of more such nicks? If not,

and assuming that the shooting last year was justified -- an inquest did clear you --

why in the world did you decide to emulate Billy The Kid and decorate your .45?”

Poor Kate resembled a gasping lake trout lying on a wooden dock, her

mouth opening and closing as no answer spilled out. Bessemer turned on his heel

and said, “No more questions for this witness.”

Waldo might have gotten off Scot-free at that point if he hadn’t let his

natural belligerence boil to the surface. As Kate left the stand, Waldo whispered,

“Bitch!” Half the women in the jury turned and looked at him, their lips suddenly

pursed in disapproval.

As it turned out, in the final analysis the majority of the jurors must have

decided Waldo was too handsome to spend the rest of his life in prison.

Consequently, they convicted him of voluntary manslaughter instead of first degree

murder. The judge sentenced him to ten to twenty years and he was sent to the

Federal Correctional Institute in Sheridan, Oregon.

Waldo Greenhill was eventually released in 2003, having served the

minimum time. Prior to his discharge, I had never heard of him. His arrest and

subsequent trial in Idaho had been a local cause celebre at the time. When he left

prison, it was big news in the Gem State. I was visiting a cousin in Southern Idaho
THE HOBBY/McDougal 27

at the time and recognized that Waldo might make a great target of opportunity. My

cousin’s comments typified the feelings of most of the residents.

“The son of a bitch got away with murder and he’ll do it again.”

Over drinks at The Hungover Cowboy in Glenn’s Ferry, cousin Jake Porter

told me the whole sordid story of Waldo Greenhill. Jake finished by saying,

“Somebody is going to get that S.O.B. and be the hero of Idaho.”

I asked him, “Where do you suppose he is, Jake?”

“That’s easy. I heard on the radio today he went straight back to Stanley.

The reporter said he’s looking for work. I think that’s probably b.s. He’s going to be

back in the woods before the month is out.”

Nonchalantly, I asked, “So, where is Stanley?”

Two days later, I checked into Danner’s Log Cabin Motel in beautiful

downtown Stanley. Beautiful is in reality an understatement. Located in the midst

of the Sawtooth Wilderness Area, in a lush valley ringed by snowy peaks, it serves

as a jumping off place for backpackers, river rafters and fishermen in the summer

and snowmobile enthusiasts in the winter. I decided the best way to find Waldo was

to chat with waitresses. In a small town like Stanley, they were certain to be only

one or two degrees removed from the culprit. I was right.

During my second breakfast at the Bridge Street Cafe I asked Magda, the

counter waitress, for ham and eggs and coffee.

Her age and her chest size matched. She appeared to be around forty. She

grinned and said, “Comin’ up, mister.” Then she addressed a man in the first booth

by the door. “You ready for some more coffee, Waldo?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 28

I glanced in his direction. He was a hairy guy, with a good start on a beard.

His clothes were new and already dirty. There were flecks of egg white in his

whiskers. He was reading a day old copy of the Twin Falls Times-News newspaper.

He looked up and said to Magda, “Well, sugar, I guess my fifteen minutes are over.

My name ain’t in the paper today.”

She smiled at him and said, “Now listen here, Waldo Greenhill, all good

things come to an end eventually. Since you ain’t famous no more, I reckon you’ll

have to get a job.”

“Yeah, I guess I should. I been checkin’ the want ads and there don’t seem

to be anything out there suitable to my special talents.”

Magda laughed and said, “What you’re good at, sweetie, ain’t goin’ to be in

the paper. Ray Calabrese told me he ain’t had no good…crop…since you left. Why

don’t you take up farmin’ again?”

Waldo pensively pulled at his beard and looked in our direction. “I been

thinkin’ that’s what I want to do, but I need a stake to hold me until harvest time.”

I recognized my cue. I said, “Maybe I could help. I’m looking for someone

to help me pack in and out of the Sawtooth. I’m putting together a photographic

book on national wilderness areas. This will be my first excursion. I need a guide

who’ll assist me in carrying some of my gear and helping set up camp. If you know

the area, maybe we can make a deal.”

Magda said, “Mister, you ain’t goin’ to find anybody who knows the

Sawtooth better than Waldo. He’s a mountain man, for sure.”

I looked at him and said, “Is that right?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 29

Waldo said, “Yeah, I’m a regular Kit Carson. What you’re talkin’ about

sounds like it’s right up my alley. How long do you plan on bein’ in there?”

I answered, “About ten days. I’m particularly interested in animal shots. I

suppose that might take a while.”

He said, “Not with me along. I know exactly where to go for deer, bear,

birds and even a mountain lion. Anything you want.”

“Well, you sound like the man for the job. You do understand it’s going to

be a lot of hard work, don’t you?”

“Sure. By the way, how much is this going to pay?”

“I’ll give you $300 a day, plus when we come back, you can keep the

equipment I provide for you.”

He perked right up. For an experienced trapper, he sure didn’t recognize real

bait when he saw it. He said, “A hell of a deal. When do you want to go?”

I said, “I’ll go down to Twin Falls to the outfitters tomorrow and get what

we need. I’ll pick you up here the day after. We’ll have breakfast and take off about

8:00 a.m.”

He said, “I could go to the Falls with you if’n you want.”

I shook my head. “No, that’s not necessary.” It would have been easier to

pop him on a trip to Twin Falls and be gone. But I had a more dramatic denouement

in mind. Anyone can kill someone directly. It takes a master to do it with panache. I

mentioned to you before that I wasn’t following my pursuit for fun or profit. Well,

that’s not entirely the way it is. I do get a degree of enjoyment out of it. Each
THE HOBBY/McDougal 30

encounter becomes a little playlet, with me as the star and my subject as the

supporting actor. Authenticity is the key.

I got off my counter stool and walked over to his booth. I put out my hand

and said, “I’m Sylvester Twining. I’m from Pennsylvania.”

We shook and he said, “I’m Waldo Greenhill. Pleased to meet ya’.”

I pulled out my money clip and peeled off three one-hundred dollar bills.

“Here, this is an advance on your fee.” As he accepted the cash, I noticed he paid

special attention to my roll. If he wasn’t hooked before, he certainly was then. I’m

sure he was thinking that this was going to be easy. I had the same assessment.

The next day, at Idaho Outfitters in Twin Falls, I bought backpacks, sleeping

bags, solo tents, a variety of Adventure brand foods, a pot, two pans, two canteens,

a large spoon, two small spoons and a ten-inch hunting knife. I also picked up a

gallon jug of water for the canteens. We wouldn’t need much. That night back at the

motel I stowed my share of the gear in my pack. I included the Glock, the blade, my

digital camera and a portable global positioning system device. I had a special

purpose in mind for the GPS.

The following morning, after checking out of Danner’s, I headed for the

Bridge Street Café. It was a delightful summer morning, the air holding just a bit of

mountain crispness. When I arrived at the restaurant just before 7 a.m., Waldo was

already there. I took a seat opposite him in his booth. He was expansive in his

happiness. He was flirting with Magda, telling her how he would take her over to

Boise for a good time when he and I got back. I thought, Maggie, don’t buy a new

dress. You won’t need it.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 31

It was then that something occurred which nearly sent my train off the track.

A uniformed female ranger entered and took a seat at the counter. Waldo gave her a

hard look, then said, “Well, if it ain’t ‘Lucky’ Stackbole. How’s the old arm? Does

it hurt when it rains?”

I knew who she was. The last thing I wanted was for a trained professional

to see Waldo and me together. This was very unfortunate indeed. I pulled the bill of

my cap a little lower and avoided her eyes. She got off her stool and walked slowly

over to us. She smiled enigmatically and said, “I hear you’re limping a bit these

days, Waldo. And by the way, I went ahead and put a half notch on my pistol. In

your honor.”

Waldo was obviously trying hard to contain his anger. I knew how much he

must have hated her. He looked at me and said, “Let’s go. It’s getting late.”

Kate Stackbole said, “What’s your hurry. Why, you haven’t even introduced

your friend to me.” Not waiting, she stuck out her hand to me and said, “I’m Ranger

Stackbole. Waldo and I are old…acquaintances.”

As we shook, I said, “I’m Sylvester Twining. I’ve engaged Mr. Greenhill as

a guide for a few days. I’m going into the Sawtooth to take photos.”

She raised an eyebrow as she asked, “Do you know who this guy is?”

I answered, “Well, I really don’t know much other than he is supposed to

know the Sawtooth pretty well.”

Stackbole said, “Oh, yeah, he knows it. But if you’re going in there with

him, you better watch your back. That’s all I have to say. Just be careful.”

With that, she said to Magda, “I’m not hungry after all.” She left the café.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 32

I asked Waldo, “What was that all about?”

Nervously, he said, “Oh, that’s just the way she is. I was caught raising

weed up near Rocky Creek. She’s a hard ass and we kinda got into it when she

arrested me. Nothin’ serious, but enough to get me a stretch in the federal pen. If

that bothers you, we can forget about our deal, I guess.”

I was silent for a moment, then said, “No, that’s okay. I smoked a few joints

when I was younger. If that’s the worst thing about you, I’m okay with it.”

I got to my feet and picked up the check. As I paid Magda I said, “We’ll see

you in a week or so. Keep the oven warm.”

We went outside and got in the car. As I pulled into the street, I went over

with Waldo the supplies I had bought. This was to strengthen his confidence in the

legitimacy of our arrangement. Waldo said, ”Sounds like you got most everything,

except coffee and mugs. Pull into Ace Groceries up ahead and I’ll run in and pick

them up. Don’t need a percolator. We can make cowboy coffee. Just boil the

grounds right in the water.”

In the Ace parking lot, he got out and headed for the door. He stopped to

talk to two men before he went in. They must have been friends, as much back-

slapping went on. During the conversation, he turned and pointed in my direction.

The men took notice of me and the Jeep. This again caused me concern. At this rate,

I thought, half the town would have seen us together.

When he returned to the car and got in, he said, “I notice you’ve got Texas

plates. I thought you were from Pennsylvania.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 33

I was ready for that. “I bought the car last year in Houston. My sister lives

there and I picked this up while I was down there on a visit. You ever been to

Texas?”

“Nah. I never been south of Idaho. This here is God’s country.”

“Well, it certainly looks like God’s favored it. I told my Sis that the people

who think Texas is the greatest just haven’t been anywhere else.”

From Stanley to the trail head was only about a fifteen minute drive on an

unpaved road. Gravel clattered against the bottom of the Jeep. As we ascended up

the slope we entered a grove of aspens, the trees quivering and shaking across the

horizon. Deep ruts in the dirt made the going increasingly difficult. We passed an

area of tree stumps, old and gray.

Waldo pointed out, “This here is an old logging road. A lot of timber went

down this mountain before the federals took it over. Back then Stanley had a real

reason for being there. Now it’s all that phony shit catering to people who can’t

make it on their own.” He paused as he mulled over what he had just said. “No

disrespect intended.”

I said, “None taken. How far before we park the car and start hiking?”

“The road peters out in about a half mile. We’ll trek up to a clearing I know.

It will be a good place to camp tonight. Fairly flat and near a creek.”

We soon came upon a melting snow bank that stretched halfway across the

road. Waldo said, “This is it. We’ll park here.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 34

We got out of the Jeep and strapped on our packs. Waldo took the lead. The

ground around the snow was soggy, with lichen and ferns growing there. I noticed

that we were leaving tracks in the squishy earth. I didn’t like that.

I followed the woodsman as he made his way through the underbrush.

Before long the elevation caught up with me and my breathing became labored. I

said, “If it is going to be much farther, I’m going to have to take a break.”

“It’s only a couple of hundred yards from here, but if you want to rest, we

can.”

“No, I can make that. Let’s go.”

There was an alpine chill in the air. Normally, I would have found it

invigorating, but the excitement of what was to come had already set me shivering.

I had to try hard to keep my teeth from chattering.

Before long, we broke out of the woods into a small meadow, which was

bordered on the upside by a low cliff of granite. It was a picturesque place, one that

would look good on a postcard. A bright shaft of sunlight slashed through the trees,

brightening a small patch of purple Camas lilies and Blue-Pod Lupine blossoms.

From what I had read about Waldo’s crime, I suspected this was the place where he

had murdered Arthur Constantine.

Waldo said, “We’ll pitch our tents over by the cliff. If there is a breeze, the

wall should cover us.”

We had the camp set up in twenty minutes. Waldo assigned me to make a

small fire circle with rocks while he gathered deadfall wood.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 35

When he returned, he dumped the kindling onto the ground and said, “I been

thinking. Maybe it would be better if you paid me now all the money you agreed

on. It’s not that I don’t trust you, but you know, I really don’t know you.”

As he spoke, he was squatting by the ring of rocks, shaving wood slivers

with a large knife. He looked at me and tapped the knife on one of the rocks. Its

blade glinted menacingly in the sunlight. I figured that what he really wanted was

the money, all the equipment and the Jeep. I decided that the moment had come for

me to act.

I hesitated, as though thinking it over, and said, “Why not? You’ll earn it

anyway. I’ll get it for you. It’s in my pack.”

As I reached into the backpack, Waldo rose and took a step in my direction.

I pulled the Glock out and pointed it at him. “Maybe you better sit back down,

Waldo. And drop that knife.”

He hesitated, trying to understand what was happening. His hand clenched

the handle of the knife, moving the blade in small circles. As he appeared to be

calculating whether or not he could take me, I said, “Forget it, Waldo. I’m a hell of

a shot. Drop the blade and sit your ass down. Now!”

He threw the knife to one side and sat on the grass. He said, “Hey, mister,

you’ve got it all wrong. I mean you no harm. And I really don’t mind waiting for

the money. Honest.”

I said, “This is not about the cash, Waldo. It’s about you. And Arthur

Constantine. You remember Ranger Constantine, don’t you?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 36

He frowned as he replied, “Yeah, I remember that son of a bitch. He tried to

kill me.”

“That’s not the way I heard it. They say he was enforcing the law and it

didn’t suit you so you murdered him.”

Waldo said, “He was trying to run me off of my homestead. I was here

legally and he was giving me a bunch of bullshit, and so was that bitch ranger with

him.”

I shook my head sorrowfully. “Come on, Waldo. We both know that’s a

load of crap. You were squatting on public land, growing marijuana and poaching

animals. When they showed up to put a stop to your arrogant, criminal ways, you

decided to kill them. I think that had always been your plan if you were cornered.

What would you have done if you had gotten them both instead of just Constantine?

Bury them and park their vehicle miles away? Yes, I think that is what you would

have done. Shoot, shovel and shut up.”

He asked, “Just who in the hell are you anyway?”

“Some might say I’m Arthur Constantine’s brother. Not his blood relative,

but a brother all the same. I am the brother of all the innocent people slaughtered by

scum like you.”

With false bravado he said, “What are you going to do? I’ve already served

my time. I didn’t steal your money. You’ve got nothing on me.”

“It’s really rather simple. You did a ten-year stretch for killing a man. I

don’t think that was an appropriate punishment. I’m here to bring you the justice

you deserve.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 37

He asked, “So are you going to put me in some kind of homemade jail? You

could never do that. I’ll probably outlive you. What happens then?

“Imprisoning you is not what I had in mind. I’m going to give you what you

gave Constantine.”

He began to shake his head slowly from side to side. He moaned, “Oh, no,

mister. Please let me go. I’ve learned my lesson. Honest I have.”

I had heard enough of his blubbering. I shot him in the forehead, just a bit

off center. I never claimed to be a perfect marksman. But when it comes to head

shots, an inch one way or the other doesn’t matter. For good measure, I pumped two

into his chest.

He had slumped to one side. I moved him onto his back and put his legs

together, then crossed his arms on his chest. As an added artistic touch, I plucked a

Camas lily and slid the stem between his cooling hands. I had a fleeting thought that

it might be nice to take a picture of him and send it to his mom. I decided against

that. After all, I’m not a cruel person. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings. On the other

hand, she may have been happy to see that the evil child she had spawned would

kill no more.

I took the portable global positioning system device from my backpack. I

checked the latitude and longitude. On a piece of paper I scribbled the coordinates. I

placed the paper on Waldo’s stomach and snapped a picture of the body with my

digital camera. I also took a closeup of his face.

The next forty-five minutes were spent piling rocks on the corpse. I wanted

it to be intact when the sheriff would find it. When I was through with the task, I
THE HOBBY/McDougal 38

policed the area, picking up my cartridge brass and all the camping equipment. It

took me three trips to get everything down to the Jeep.

The sun was setting as I drove through Stanley. I drove on to Twin Falls and

checked into the Gem Motel. After all my exertion I slept quite soundly. The next

morning I slipped on a pair of latex gloves and visited a digital photo lab. I printed

two sets of the snaps of Waldo. I visited the post office next and bought two

stamped envelopes. I mailed one group of pics to Kate Stackbole and the other to

Sheriff Demonte. Two days later I was back in Texas.

I heard from my Cousin Jake a few days later. He had phoned to let me

know that some fine citizen had killed Waldo Greenhill. The sheriff had said in a

press conference that they had no leads.

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 39

Chapter Four

It might seem to you that there is a great degree of coincidence in my being

where the criminals whom I dispatch are located. Happenstance has little to do with

it. The fact is that there is an abundance of felons from whom I can choose, no

matter where I go. It is not a matter of seeking candidates, but rather, of winnowing

them out.

The ones I find most satisfying to eliminate are the murderers who blame

their iniquities on anything or anyone else other than themselves.

You know the defenses. “I was high on drugs, or I was drunk. I have a

dependency disease. I am bipolar. My father beat me. My mother left me. I can’t

help doing what I do.” And on and on goes the litany of bullshit excuses. These are

the ones who will, more likely than not, never stop killing because in their minds

they have rationalized evil. Once a killer excuses his malevolence, he can act

without compunction. After all, he thinks, it’s not his fault. And God forbid that

some judge or jury excuses him because they have become convinced he is a nut

case. Nothing emboldens evil more than to exonerate it because of the belief that no

sane person could do what the wicked criminal did.

I am not the pot calling the kettle black. I am not a psycho. If I were, you,

dear reader, might be in danger. Or some other law-abiding citizen could be in

jeopardy. But this is not the case. A crazed individual might do you in someday, but

it certainly won’t be me.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 40

Distributing retribution means a lot to me. It’s what really counts. I find that

a lot of what passes for importance is really nothing but sentimental bullshit. I

remember the maudlin sobbing of the thousands who mourned the passing of that

renowned druggie, John Lennon. Twenty-five years later they and their kids

blubbered again, crowding into Strawberry Fields in New York’s Central park to

pay homage to a man they called ‘genius’. Yoko Ono received as much adulation as

Eleanor Roosevelt ever had. I will probably be around to observe the golden

anniversary of his achieving room temperature. Oh, happy day. In the meantime, I

have bigger fish to fry.

When it comes to killing, I accept that I am small potatoes. Hitler, Stalin,

Mussolini, Ho Chi Minh…were responsible for the deaths of millions. But I can’t

say for sure that any one of them actually caused a death with his own hand. So

what does that make me? A larger menace to humanity? No. I am a threat only to

the scummy detritus of a society that breeds murderous villains who have no moral

compass that would keep them on the straight and narrow.

Many things have influenced me and led me to the path I’m on. Knowing

Joshua Fishbein, for instance. I don’t worry inordinately about my health, but if my

heart or my colon is about to double-cross me, I want to know about it. Josh

Fishbein is a general practioner in Dallas and has been my family doctor for several

years. He actually cried the day he told Dori and me that she had cancer. Dr.

Fishbein’s grandparents perished at Treblinka. His sister, Sarah, was blown to bits

on a bus in Tel Aviv while on vacation in Israel. He has a small oil portrait of her

hanging in the waiting room at his clinic. She had been beautiful, with a haunting
THE HOBBY/McDougal 41

sadness in her painted eyes. Because of the travail that had been visited upon him

and his family, he had become an incredibly empathetic physician. Even all that

sorrow never diminished his great sense of humor. I remember one time when I

called to see him because of an unusual dizzy spell. By the time I saw him, I had no

more spells to report. In his wry manner, he said, “Well, Duncan, here you are, all

dressed up and no vertigo.” I saw him at least once every few months. My

relationship with Joshua and my awareness of the tragedies that had affected his life

have helped to mold my attitudes about crime and criminals.

My daughter, Elizabeth, and son-in-law, Gerald Corrigan, live in Brooklyn,

New York. The day I had long hoped for arrived when Beth gave birth to a sweet

baby daughter, Kayla Corrigan. It was on the trip to New York to see my first

grandchild that I learned of the circumstances which set the stage for justice to

embrace yet another miscreant. There had been an account in the New York Post

concerning citizen outrage in a Jersey shore community over the release from

prison, three months early, of one Edward Savoy. He was not a well regarded man

as you will see.

Janice Lenz had been a cheerleader in high school and later, in college.

Unlike many of her friends, she did not date football players unless they were

smart. She had more brains than beauty, and that said a lot, as she was indeed a very

pretty girl. She fell in love with a boy in her university sophomore class. He was a

math whiz and couldn’t catch a football, much less throw one. Don Burden told his

friends that he had fallen in love at first sight with Janice. That she felt the same

way about him was the high point of his life. They were married the day after
THE HOBBY/McDougal 42

graduation, at Saint Thomas Aquinas Catholic Church in Sandy Shores, New

Jersey. Don went to work for an insurance company as an actuary. Janice found a

job at the First State Bank in Sandy Shores, where she eventually attained the rank

of assistant manager. Her work area was adorned with pictures of her family; her

husband, Don, and her daughter, Laurie, six months.

Her father, Arthur Lenz, had returned from Vietnam in ’68 with a Silver Star

on his chest and ambition in his heart. He went to college on his veteran’s benefits

and became a lawyer. In 1986 he ran for the office of Mayor of Sandy Shores and

was elected. Jan’s mother, Katherine Lenz, was a stay at home mom who devoted

several hours each week to volunteer service at Sandy Shores Medical Center. In

1983, she was honored by the hospital as the Volunteer of the Year. The family was

held in great esteem by the citizens.

Janice Burden was twenty-five years old when she died. Her death was

grisly in the extreme. Her left arm was ripped from her body just before she was

decapitated.

She had been driving home from work.

As she crossed Highway 36, a man driving a 1983 Buick ran a red light and

smashed broadside into Janice’s Toyota. It was estimated that he had been going

more than eighty miles per hour. Edward Savoy’s blood alcohol registered three

times the legal limit. As so often happens when a drunk driver kills an innocent

person, the felon escaped with only minor injuries. Mr. Savoy was not a novice

drunk driver. He had been arrested eight times before for DUI.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 43

By any measure of the word, Savoy was a loser. And being one gave him

the impetus to drink. As he drank, he became in his mind less a loser and more a

man, accepted by his only friends, the other habitués of Jersey bars.

Six years before, he had roared through a school zone and killed Millicent

Roland, a crossing guard. At the time of that crime, he had no driver’s license and

no chance of ever having one again. When he was arrested at the scene, he

mumbled, in a drunken stupor, “Thank God she was just a nigger.” Judge Garner

West, a distinguished African-American jurist, presided at Savoy’s trial. Judge

West was known for his stern demeanor. However, when he informed Savoy that he

would be spending seventy-two months in the East Jersey State Prison at Rahway,

he pronounced with a smile. Most people figured that at least half of the sentence

was due to Savoy’s racist comment about Millicent. Some attributed all of it to

Savoy’s stupidity. He was paroled in five and a half years, after convincing the

parole board that he was sober and would stay that way. His first day on the outside

found him showing his good faith by going on a three-day bender. He killed Mrs.

Burden a few months later. He was driving his sister’s car.

After the smashup with Janice Burden, Savoy was immediately arrested. At

the subsequent trial, his defense was that he couldn’t help himself, that his

alcoholism was a disease. The jury found him guilty of vehicular manslaughter. The

judge, who saw something in Savoy that no one else did, gave him only four years

and sent him back to Rahway. He was released after doing all but the final ninety

days of his stretch. His sister, Juanita Montana, never gave up on Edward. She took

him in and offered to help him find a job. The immediate problem she faced was
THE HOBBY/McDougal 44

that prospective employers wanted sober workers. She sent Edward out the door

each noon with twenty dollars and a copy of the newspaper help wanted ads. She no

longer had an automobile, so Eddie was forced to ride the bus. She optimistically

circled the advertisements that she thought he might be qualified to answer. After

ten days she was out $200 and Eddie was happy as a clam.

It was about this time that I decided to go looking for Mr. Savoy. I wanted

to buy him a drink, always a good way to meet someone. Juanita’s name had been

mentioned in several of the newspaper accounts of the brouhaha over Savoy’s

release. She was listed in the Monmouth County phone book at an address in

Eatontown, New Jersey. The central Jersey communities of Monmouth County are

quiet burgs, existing as bedroom communities for the most part. Much of the local

economy is derived from the summer influx of weekenders and vacationers who

came to enjoy the surf at the shore.

It was late spring when I checked into the Holiday Inn in Tinton Falls,

adjacent to Eatontown. As I lay in bed that night I put together a plan for Mr.

Savoy. I rehearsed in my mind the scolding I would deliver to him before the coup

de grace. In a macabre way, I thought of such a rebuke as a “Hannibal Lecture.”

This pun would not be passed along, but as I nodded off there came a smile to my

face. That was a good one, I thought.

By now, I imagine you are somewhat taken aback by what appears to be a

cavalier attitude I have shown in my dealings with the people I dispatch. Actually, I

don’t care what you think. I believe that I am doing society’s work, where society

can’t or won’t. As we are all part of mankind, the excision of the criminals among
THE HOBBY/McDougal 45

us is self-defense. Look upon me, if you will, as a white corpuscle in the body of

man. Your life is infinitely better because of my dedication. I do not believe God

will punish me for the men I killed in Vietnam. My hobby is an extension of that

war, no more, no less. And of course, you’re quite welcome.

The next morning I drove to the local Staples Office Supply. I purchased a

sturdy executive office chair, the kind with nice wheels. Staples was coincidentally

next door to The Home Depot. After loading the chair into the back of my Jeep, I

visited the super hardware store and bought duct tape, a knife, and a sixty-foot

length of rope. After a stop at Dunkin Donuts, I parked across the street from

Juanita Montana’s wooden frame house. The yard was a mess, the paint was peeling

and one window had masking tape criss-crossed on it to hold it together. It appeared

that Edward was no help at home either.

As I waited and watched, clouds began to roll in while I listened to a talk

show on WABC radio. It was after two in the afternoon before Savoy exited the

house and meandered down to the corner bus stop. I recognized his sallow face

from the newspaper clipping on the seat next to me. He was a skinny man, typical

of those who attain most of their sustenance from a bottle.

After he boarded the bus ten minutes later, it moved off in a pall of diesel

exhaust. I followed it down Broadway Street until Savoy got off. He waited for the

bus to depart, then scurried eagerly across the thoroughfare and entered a

nondescript tavern. I waited for an hour before I left my car and entered the lounge.

McNulty’s Bar in Sandy Shores is a neighborhood lounge where the same

faces can be seen nearly every day. Dark inside, until your eyes adjust to the
THE HOBBY/McDougal 46

dimness. Smell of stale beer and decayed dreams. A non-future with a head on it.

The opposite of “Cheers.” That was Brian McNulty’s place, the place where Eddie

Savoy chose to spend his days and his sister’s money.

There were a half dozen people in the joint. Eddie was sitting at the bar, a

draft beer in front of him. He was alone, and seemed interested more in drinking

than anything else. I took a stool two seats away from him. The bartender, whom I

took to be McNulty, was a taciturn man who responded to his customers’ needs

without extraneous conversation. Eddie was already four Buds toward becoming a

scintillating conversationalist.

His comment when he saw me was, “New here, aren’t you?”

I looked at him a moment before I responded. “Yeah, just passing through.

I’m on my way to Atlantic City. Drove down from Boston. Got leg cramps, so I

checked into a motel here. That happens to me a lot. I’m supposed to take

potassium for it, but I forgot my pills. I’ll pick up some tomorrow before I leave.”

He nodded sympathetically. “Going to try your luck at the casinos?”

I answered, “Yeah. An insurance man doesn’t get a lot of excitement..”

McNulty moved to where I sat. “What’ll you have, mister?”

“Bourbon, neat, with a large glass of water.” I ordered it that way so I could

get rid of the whisky surreptitiously without drinking it. I would be sober as a judge

(ha,ha) when I made my move.

I said to Savoy, “My name is Jefferson Clement.” I stuck out my hand. He

shook it with a soft, weak paw and told me his name.

I asked, “What do you do?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 47

He answered, “You mean besides drinking?”

I laughed. We were already buddies. This might be easier than I had

thought.

He continued, “I was in the merchant marine. An oiler. Mostly on foreign

registry tubs, non-union. I’ve been around the world three times. That’s where I

learned to drink. Nothing else to do. Couldn’t develop a relationship with anyone

because I was never any place long enough to learn her last name. It’s not easy to

get blackballed in the third world navy, but I did. They will allow a drunk to work,

but not to fuck up. I laid up a Panamanian freighter with ruined bearings because I

was shit-faced on the job. That did it. So now I’m looking for a land job. They

aren’t easy to find. Especially when I have to ride a fuckin’ bus everywhere. Soon

as I get some money ahead, I’m going to buy a car.”

Eddie back behind the wheel of an automobile was the very last thing New

Jersey needed.

I said, “Yeah, jobs are hard to come by sometimes. I was lucky. I was never

out of work for very long. And the insurance business isn’t too bad. You have to

have the gift of gab, and I’ve been blessed with it.”

“I thought about insurance sales, but what do you do when you run out of

relatives?” He chuckled at his lame attempt at humor.

“That’s not really where the business comes from. Represent a good line of

companies and sell a variety … life, home, car. Spread it out.”

By now, I was sure that everyone who heard us was convinced I was an

indemnity salesman. For an hour, Eddie pissed and moaned about his bad luck, but
THE HOBBY/McDougal 48

never talked about his prison record. When I offered to buy him a drink, he

accepted without shame, and since he wasn’t paying, he switched from beer to

Absolut Vodka.

By eight that evening, Savoy was wobbling, in danger of falling off his seat.

The free liquor had been too tempting.

Outside, I could hear the rumbling of a spring storm. Before long, even

above the jukebox noise, I could hear the drumming of rain on the roof.

There was a puddle of whisky on the floor where I had been disposing of the

Maker’s Mark. The only sober person in the place, besides me, was McNulty, and I

didn’t think he had seen me dumping my drinks.

I said to McNulty, “I hope we haven’t bored you with all our blather.”

He said, “No sweat. It’s all research for my book. Going to call it, ‘Drinking

Out Loud.’”

I laughed and said, “That’s a good one on which to end the evening. I better

head back to the hotel. I would wait for the rain to end, but it doesn’t sound as

though it’s going to let up.”

I turned to Savoy and said, “You got a way to get home?”

McNulty looked at me over his glasses. “He doesn’t have a car anymore. He

rides the bus.”

I cocked my head as though I was thinking that comment over. I said, “What

the hell, Eddie, I’ll give you a lift to your house if you would like.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 49

Nearly comatose, Savoy shrugged assent and struggled to stand erect. I

grabbed him under the left armpit. I nodded to McNulty and said, “I’ll take him

home. No doubt, he’ll see you tomorrow.”

The barkeep nodded, his hands on the mahogany surface in front of him.

“Need any help with him?”

“Naw, I can handle it okay. Good night.”

Outside, the downpour had not abated. As I steered Savoy toward my Jeep,

rain sloshing down his neck partially revived him. He looked at me in the dim light

of the tavern sign. “Who are you?”

“I’m Jeff Clement, the insurance guy. Remember?”

His head bobbed drunkenly as he slurred, “Oh, yeah. I need to get home. I

gotta catch the bus.”

“Eddie, I’ll take you home. Give me your address before you pass out.”

He mumbled a street name and number. I didn’t catch all of it, but it made

no difference. We weren’t going there anyway.

I opened the passenger door and pushed him onto the seat. He dragged his

legs in and slumped down. I shut the door and sloshed through the rain to my door

and opened it. The wet clothing made it chilly. I started the engine and turned on

the heater. The smell of alcohol emanating from Eddie was strong.

Savoy was out cold. His fun was over.

I drove to a large shopping center on State Highway 35 and pulled in. The

stores were still open, so I drove to a place in the parking area where there were no

cars. I waited there until one in the morning, when all the stores were closed and
THE HOBBY/McDougal 50

everyone had gone home. By then the storm had passed. The streets were wet,

reflecting refractions of the street lamps. My passenger slept soundly, snoring most

of the time.

There were several exits from the center. One of them had shrubbery

growing on both sides of the opening. It was ideal for what I had in mind. Eddie

Savoy had destroyed people with two tons of speeding metal. It was only

appropriate that he face the same fate. Remember, this is not revenge by proxy I am

describing. It is elimination of a criminal threat living in our midst. The method I

had selected would assist him in understanding why he deserved what was about to

happen to him.

The rain had stopped and a thin ground fog had rolled in from the shore. I

opened my door and went to the back of the SUV. I swung open the rear door and

removed the chair. I stuck the roll of duct tape into my pocket. I rolled the chair to a

spot adjacent to the passenger door of the vehicle. I opened it and shook Savoy

awake. He was still drunk. He muttered, “Are we home?”

“Not yet, Eddie. You need to get out of the car for a minute. Here, I’ll help

you.”

I grabbed him by the arm and pulled him out. He wobbled as I pushed him

into the chair. He looked around groggily. Confusion showed on his face as he

asked, “Where are we? What the hell am I doing in a chair?”

I said, “Hold still for a moment.” I hurriedly wrapped the tape around his

chest, arms and the chair, completing a half dozen turns.

He began to emerge from the haze and said, “What are you doing?”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 51

I didn’t answer. Instead, I wrapped some tape around his ankles.

I looked at him as he sat there. He struggled futilely before giving up. He

wasn’t going to get loose.

I went back to the rear of the Liberty and removed the coil of rope. When I

returned to Savoy, I said, “Let me jog your memory, Eddie. Do you recall Millicent

Roland or Janice Burden?”

He didn’t respond.

“Sure you do, Eddie. They are both six feet under, and you put them there.

Mrs. Roland’s head split open when it hit your windshield. Mrs. Burden’s head was

lopped off when you hit her car. I think it might be sweet justice if something

similar happened to you.”

I held up the rope. “I’m going to tie this to your chair. Then I’m going to

stretch it across this street. I’ll wait on the other side for an eighteen-wheeler to

come along, and then at the last possible second, I’ll pull on the rope and drag you

in front of the truck. With luck, the huge mass of metal will mangle your body very

painfully. It should kill you, but if it doesn’t, you will probably wish that it had.”

Fright spread across Savoy’s face. “In God’s name, why are you doing this.

I never did anything to you!”

And then, the old familiar refrain. He said, “I’ve done my time. I’ve paid my

debt to society, for God’s sake. You can’t do this. You can’t.” He began to cry,

tears streaking his cheeks.

I studied him for a moment, then said, “Well, actually, Edward, I can. As for

the reason why I am doing this, it is primarily to deter you from repeating your sins.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 52

But there is a larger issue. Look at it this way. There are thousands of people who

have maimed and killed others by causing wrecks while they were driving drunk.

Now, logic dictates that it would be nigh impossible to take them all out, so I have

chosen you. I am going to crucify you, figuratively speaking. Edward, you’re going

to pay with your life for all those sinners’ transgressions. You’re the chosen one,

the man who will lift the burden from the backs of all the alcoholics who have

murderously crapped on the rest of us. Your name should be on a plaque in every

bar in the country, but I’m afraid it won’t be. But I’ll know what a great sacrifice

you will have made.”

His crying became a wail. He sobbed, “I’ll never do it again, Mister. I’ve

learned my lesson. I’ll quit drinking. I can turn my life around. Please, for God’s

sake, give me one more chance.”

“Sorry, Eddie, but you’ve had all the chances you are going to get.”

He began to scream. I wrapped tape around his mouth. He groaned like a

soulless animal.

I bent and tied the rope to the base of the chair, then reached underneath and

released the spring that held the chair in a low position. It bobbed up high enough

that Savoy’s feet were off the ground. He was positioned in the shopping center

exit, hidden from both directions by shrubbery. I waited until there was no traffic

and trotted across the roadway, letting the line lay on the pavement. I squatted by

the curb, hidden by a postal collection box. A few cars went by. No one seemed to

notice the rope. Finally, I could hear the engine and tires of a large truck

approaching.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 53

“Do you hear that, Eddie?” I called out “That’s the devil, coming to get

you.”

Dimly, I could see him trying to break free. I couldn’t see his eyes, but I am

sure they were full of terror. At least I hoped they were.

The huge vehicle came closer, and closer, and at the exact right moment, I

hauled the line as rapidly as I could. A split second before it smashed into Eddie,

the driver hit the brakes. Too late. Savoy and the chair tumbled end over end fifty

feet down the roadway, stopping finally beneath a street lamp. I could see he was a

bloody mess. As the driver dismounted and ran toward Savoy’s remains, I slipped

across the road behind his truck. I walked swiftly to my car and left the parking lot

unnoticed. Another enemy combatant had bitten the dust.

News of Eddie’s demise made the front page of the local paper. The police

said they had no clues. I guess the rope, the chair and the tape didn’t qualify as

evidence. When they identified Savoy, the reports of his death moved quickly to a

cold case file jacket. As the detective assigned to the case said to a reporter, “Too

many suspects. Half the population of Sandy Shores, or more.”

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 54

Chapter Five

By now, you are either with me or ready to call law enforcement and turn

me in. But this is a piece of fiction, so that is not an option. Or is it? Could it be that

this is really an autobiographical book, a thinly disguised confession, and could it

be that I am really as horrible and evil as some of you may believe? After all, dear

reader, I really am a retired judge from Texas. How much else herein is true? Are

the cases I recount camouflaged accounts of actual assassinations? And so what if

they are?

Given the chance, wouldn’t you shoot Osama bin Laden? So what is the

difference between you and me? Simple. I do it and you don’t.

You may also have noticed that there is nothing personal in my alleged

misbehavior. In fact, the choice of subjects is made almost entirely on an

impersonal basis. I usually go after the ones who interest me.

Revenge is not a factor. Justice is. This has always been true even when my

good friend, Evan Jacoby, was murdered during a carjacking. The perp, Alonzo

Goshen, was captured the same day. He did not get bail, and was later sentenced to

life without parole. It was entirely coincidental that Goshen was later stabbed to

death by Muhammad Jackson in the laundry at the Ellis Unit of the Texas

penitentiary system. It was further by chance that Jackson’s wife received ten

thousand dollars in cash two days after I withdrew an identical amount from my

savings. Deepak Chopra wasn’t far off the mark when he said, “When you live your

life with an appreciation of coincidences and their meanings, you connect with the
THE HOBBY/McDougal 55

underlying field of infinite possibilities.” Well, coincidentally, Alonzo is infinitely

dead. Was it I who crossed the line between assassination and murder? Who, me?

Shame on you for even thinking that.

And then there was Dieter Schlecter. He was never known to be a ladies

man. His friends all said he was a loner who kept to himself. They never saw him

with a date. At forty-one, he was still on his first job, working as a furniture

deliveryman for New York’s Giant Home Furnishings in Brooklyn, New York.

Giant was way down on the low end of low end furniture companies. They gained

some notoriety when they survived a challenge in court by the New York football

Giants due to alleged name infringement. The apostrophe “s” on New York’s saved

the furniture dealer from a financial setback. Most of its customers are poor blacks

and Hispanics. To African-Americans, it is bad sticks. To Latinos, muebles malo.

But in most cases it is all they could afford. Dieter Schlecter was the ideal

deliveryman for a sorry company like Giant. He was someone who would never

find even the bottom rung on the ladder of success.

Lifting heavy bureaus and tables had helped him develop a strong body. He

usually had underarm odor equally as intense. His face had a doughy look, with

pocked cheeks and a bulbous nose. He never drank on the job, but made up for that

the moment he got off work. True to his German heritage, his favorite beverage was

beer. He drank it from quart bottles, and the cheaper the better.

His choice of alcohol was indicative of all his life preferences. Inexpensive

food, clothing and lodging. After work each evening, like a snake in a rocky hole,

he ventured out only to pursue food, drink, or sex. And he certainly never paid for
THE HOBBY/McDougal 56

sex. He got his share, but it was only because he was a rapist. His choice of victims

was selected from among those whom he had reason to believe would not resist.

When he was drunk, he usually went after the first female target of opportunity that

came along. Most of his prey were prostitutes who plied their trade in the poorer

parts of Brooklyn. His modus operandi was simple. He negotiated sex and then

simply refused to pay for it after completion of the act. When the hooker

complained, he would beat her nearly enough to put her out of business.

Complaints to the police, when there were any, were scoffed at by the

hardened cops who didn’t believe the vics. If some guy had taken a working girl off

the street for a while, it just made their job easier. It seemed, then, that Dieter had

hit upon the perfect scheme to satisfy his lust and need to dominate.

Schlecter was oblivious to much of the world around him back in 1983.

Tom Brokaw was the new NBC anchor, the Soviets shot down Korean Air flight

007, Metallica released their debut album, “Kill ‘Em All,” and Tennessee Williams

died. Dieter had no clue regarding these events and wouldn’t have cared one way or

the other even if he had. He was an ignorant man, apparently happy to stay that

way.

Maria Santos was not a prostitute. She was, in fact, a medical assistant who

worked at the Flatbush Free Clinic. Employment there was less a job than it was a

calling. Low wages, long hours and no hope of advancement. But Maria knew that

her reward would come in time, when the Holy Mother would some day clasp her

to her bosom and caress the years of care away. She had been at the health center

for eleven years, since she was eighteen.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 57

Maria lived with her mom in a fourth floor tenement apartment. It was hot in

the summer and cold in the winter. But it was all they could afford. Her mother,

Alberta, was a janitress at P.S. 77. She was not anywhere close to being among the

hierarchy of janitors in the New York Public School system. Many of the head

janitors were wealthy, living high on kickbacks from the vendors who sold the

schools cleaning supplies, toilet paper, towels, brooms and more. It was the

Albertas of the system who did the work.

So the two hard-working decent women lived a life of gray and oppressive

penury. Their working hours were different, with Alberta leaving for her tasks

about an hour after Maria came home. They usually ate dinner together, and

enjoyed Sundays, their one day off which coincided.

Dieter Schlecter saw Maria at the clinic when he went in to have the doctor

check his penis to see why it was exuding pus. The diagnosis was gonorrhea. He

joked with the doc and told him that his father, who had served in the Far East,

called it gone-to-Korea. Doctor Grimes didn’t think that was humorous. He asked

Dieter where he had contracted the disease and was told, “In an alley. I didn’t catch

her name.” He prescribed an antibiotic and told Dieter to come back in a week.

Most men, even one as reptilian in nature as Dieter, have a vision of the

ideal woman. It could be that she resembles a girl on whom he once had a secret

crush. Or it might be that she possesses a certain combination of facial features that

he finds appealing. In Dieter’s case, Maria had the misfortune to look a lot like

Bonita Bazooms, a Latina porn star whom Schlecter had viewed many times on his

DVD player.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 58

In interviews later with a prison psychiatrist Dieter said that the vision of

Bonita and Maria began to meld into one. He said he began to attribute erotic

qualities to Miss Santos. The thought grew that she would perform sexually like a

porn star were she to be sufficiently aroused. He would act on that impulse as soon

as he could. He convinced himself that once his cock was inside Maria, she would

succumb to the desires that she (and all women, he believed) had but were reluctant

to show.

When he went back to see the doctor for a follow-up visit, he saw Maria

again. He began to stalk her, at first from a distance and later from a closer

proximity. Finally, one evening as she left the Dominican bodega near her building,

he spoke to her. He came up behind her and grasped her elbow. “Where are you

going in such a hurry, Maria?”

She turned, alarmed. She asked tremulously, “What do you want?”

“I just want us to be friends. You know me, from the clinic.”

She said, “Leave me alone. I have to go home.”

“I won’t hurt you. I just want to talk to you.”

She tried to pull away and said, “Well, you are hurting me. Let me go. And,

yes, I know who you are. You have a disease.”

He said gutturally, “Not no more, I don’t. The doc cured me. You wouldn’t

have to worry none about that.”

She pushed at him with her free hand and said loudly, “Leave me alone! Let

me go.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 59

People on the sidewalk passed them by, thinking they were witnessing a

domestic quarrel. No one wanted to get involved.

Dieter pulled her close and whispered in her ear, “You come with me or I’ll

kill you, bitch.” His foul breath made her gag and she shook with disgust. It was

then that she felt the pain in her side. He had stuck a knife a little way into her flesh,

barely a scratch, but painful. The early twilight of November had helped mask this

part of the attack. Maria couldn’t believe this was happening to her, out in the open

with people passing by. A man approached and she looked into his eyes and he

averted his face and hurried on by.

In desperation, Maria began screaming. A young man with a knapsack had

just passed the couple, but turned when he heard her. He went back to them and

grabbed Dieter’s shoulder. “Hey, mister, leave her alone,” he shouted.

Schlecter growled, “This is my woman. Fuck off.”

Maria shrieked, “He’s going to kill me. He’s got a knife. Help me!”

The man who had stopped to help moved back slightly. He hadn’t

volunteered for a knife fight. However, as other people began to gather around,

Dieter turned and ran through the crowd, disappearing down the first side street. A

woman in the cluster had a cell phone and had already dialed 911. Moments later,

the wail of a police siren was heard, echoing between the tenements. Maria

staggered to the closest stoop and slumped onto the bottom step. An old woman

came down the stairs and sat beside her, comforting her. A chill not due to the cool

evening wracked Maria as she began to sob.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 60

She was transported by an NYC EMS vehicle to the Brooklyn Hospital

Center on DeKalb Avenue, where she was treated and released. Detective Joe Sloan

of Special Victims who interviewed her assured her that Dieter Schlecter would be

arrested and that she had no reason to fear him.

Dieter made his way to his apartment and locked the door. Two detectives

were at his door within an hour of the assault. He tried to explain that it was simply

a domestic dispute between a man and his girl. His reasoning fell on deaf ears. He

was cuffed and transported to the precinct house.

His employer, Grant Simpkins, visited Dieter in the jail the next day. He

assured the wayward deliveryman that he would put up his bail as soon as it was set

at arraignment. He did so, and Schlecter was back on the job the following day.

Dieter was unaware of the promise that Detective Sloan had made to Maria.

He let two days pass, to allow things die down a bit. On the third day, he waited

after work for Maria in the vestibule of her tenement building. It was nearly dark

there, the only illumination emanating from a dim sign next to the fire door. The

sign said XIT, the E having been broken long ago. The burned out hall lights were

never replaced by the tightfisted landlord. Dieter’s breath fogged in the cold of the

stairwell as waited for the love of his life to come home.

Let me point out that some might call Dieter a sicko. I never would. He was

not sick, he was evil. Evil is the driving force behind all criminal acts. The perps do

not see themselves as wicked. They don’t even admit to being selfish, cruel

bastards, which is what they are. Again, their iniquity is why they can never, ever
THE HOBBY/McDougal 61

be rehabilitated, and indeed, has convinced me that rehabilitation almost never

works.

So Dieter Schlecter lay in wait, like a python with only one goal. He stood

in a small alcove where an inoperative fire hose hung on the wall, coiled and

molding. Someone named Chaco had tagged the wall opposite him in huge spray

painted red letters. Residents trickled in, heading for home. The stale smell of the

building began to succumb to scents of aroz con pollo, frijoles negros, curtido

Salvadoreno and chapina. Dieter recognized only the cabbage fragrance, but all of

the blended odors made him hungry. But his lust for Maria was stronger than his

desire for food. His patience was rewarded at five forty-five when his target entered

the building. As she walked past him, he slipped up behind her and put his left arm

around her, his hand resting on her right breast. His other hand covered her mouth,

preventing her from crying for help.

He said, “You keep quiet, Maria, and you won’t get hurt. Let’s go to your

apartment.” He shoved her forward to the stairs. Too frightened to resist, Maria let

him shove her up the steps. They stumbled up the four flights, coming finally to

Maria’s door. Schlecter said impatiently, “Come on, Goddammit, open it. Let’s go

in there where it’s warm. I been freezin’ my ass off, waitin’ for you, Honey.”

Maria fumbled in her purse for her key, stifling the urge to scream. She did

believe him regarding his threats. When the door clicked open, Dieter shoved Maria

violently into the apartment, which was little more than a large room and a

bathroom. A white curtain, hung by shower curtain rings on a stretched wire,

separated twin beds from the rest of the quarters. It was then that he saw Maria’s
THE HOBBY/McDougal 62

mother, Alberta. She stood by the kitchen stove, her head turned to see what the

commotion was.

Dieter exclaimed, “Who the hell are you?”

Maria had moved across the room to her mother’s side. Schlecter kicked the

door shut and asked again, “I said, who the fuck are you.”

“I’m Maria’s Mama, Alberta Santos. And who are you, you disrespectful

man, to come in here like this, with your foul mouth? Maria, who is this man?”

Fright showing in her voice, Maria answered, “It’s Dieter Schlecter, Mama,

the man who attacked me on the street. He forced his way in.”

Alberta said, “You leave us alone. I will call the police.”

“Fuck the police, old woman. They don’t want me. They let me go.”

Schlecter strode quickly across the room, shoving Alberta away and

grasping Maria’s arm. “You two shut up. I’ll do the talking. You do what I want

and nobody gets hurt. Maria, you are my woman, and you can’t change that.”

Alberta lunged at Dieter, a small kitchen knife in her upraised hand. The

universal instinct of a mother gave impetus to her act. Schlecter released Maria and

grabbed Alberta’s arm. It was no contest. He snapped her forearm like a flower

stem, then slammed her jaw with his fist. She slumped to the floor, unconscious.

Maria stood in shock, too frightened to move.

Schlecter pushed her past the curtain and threw her bodily onto one of the

beds.

He raped her, and when she did not react with enthusiasm, he cursed her and

raped her again. Throughout the ordeal, she sobbed and prayed in Spanish to God
THE HOBBY/McDougal 63

for help. This reaction to the sexual act enraged Dieter. He stood and pulled his

pants up. Frustrated, he did what any self-respecting rapist does. He beat her until

she was barely conscious, then left. Her eyes were swollen, her face was bloodied,

her upper body covered with purple welts. Barely able to move, she rose from the

bed and went to check on her mother, who had regained consciousness and was

moaning with pain.

Maria left the room and stumbled across the hall to the apartment of Jose

and Graciela Principio. Mr. Principio called 911 and Mrs. Principio tended to the

two women until an ambulance arrived.

By midnight, Dieter was in the jail at the 67th Precinct on Flatbush Avenue.

This visit began a long period of incarceration for the evil Mr. Schlecter. Mr.

Simpkins did not respond to Dieter’s phone calls, and in fact, never spoke to him

again. Randolph Wiskall, the public defender assigned to Dieter’s case, met with

him two days after his arrest. He listened to Dieter’s story and determined he was

guilty as sin and had absolutely no defense. Wiskall persuaded him to cop a plea.

The Assistant District Attorney agreed to a sentence of ten to twenty years for rape

and felonious assault. This was more than most first time offenders receive.

However, both the A.D.A. and the judge were agreed that Schlecter was obsessed

with Maria and that she could be protected only by locking her attacker away for a

long time. Maria and Alberta eventually recovered from their injuries, though

Alberta was not able to resume her duties at the school. She found work as a private

maid for a family in the Park Slope section of Brooklyn, at less pay.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 64

I became aware of the story when an article appeared in the New York Post

regarding Schlecter. It seems that Maria was not an only child. She had a younger

brother named Cristofero who had been in Puerto Rico when his mother and sister

had been brutalized by Schlecter. By the time Cristofero Santos made his way to

New York, Dieter was already in the Bare Hill Medium Correctional Facility. Senor

Santos was understandably highly irate about the attacks. Schlecter served nearly

the full twenty years before his release. Santos never forgot for a moment what had

happened. Three days after Schlecter was released, Cristofero attempted to take his

revenge. The rage he had nursed for two decades boiled over. He confronted the

rapist outside his parole officer’s building and fired a pistol at him at point blank

range. Cristofero had never before fired a weapon. He missed his target. Schlecter

did not stick around to see who the crazy Puerto Rican was. He ran for his life.

Santos chased him, firing five more times, missing with every blast. Thankfully, he

also missed numerous bystanders, who also ran for their lives. Police and parole

officers ran into the street and chased after the shooter. They collared him as he was

attempting to reload. Dieter was long gone.

Poor Cristofero was held without bail and copped a plea to illegally

possessing a handgun and to firing at Mr. Schlecter. He was sentenced to six

months, to be served at the Rikers Island jail.

After reading of the account in the newspaper, and also of the history of

Dieter Schlecter’s crime, I decided that Schlecter had not paid nearly enough to

society, which of course, always includes me in its number. I suspected that

Schlecter was probably destitute and would be in need of cash. I phoned Robbie
THE HOBBY/McDougal 65

Wilson, Schlecter’s parole officer, and told him I had read about the fracas on Jay

Street and felt sympathy for Schlecter’s plight.

“I am in the warehouse business and currently need a man to drive a

delivery truck. If Schlecter needs a job, I’d like to help. Do you have a phone

number for him?”

Wilson thanked me for my offer, which I knew would make his job easier.

“Well, I’m really not supposed to give out any information on these mutts, but I

guess he needs help, for sure. He doesn’t have a phone but he lives at 2201 Driggs,

in a flophouse run by the state. I ought to warn you, though, that I don’t think he’s

going to make it on the outside. He’s a mean son of a bitch. But you never know, do

you?”

I said, “No, you don’t. But I’ll bet I can turn him around. Give me a week or

two and I’ll wager his bad-ass days will be over.”

That afternoon I dropped by the Driggs Street address. A seedy looking

clerk sat behind a counter atop which a wire cage wall separated him from the

riffraff. The place smelled of stale mop water, moldy wood and the ubiquitous odor

of urine. I said to the man on duty, “Looking for Dieter Schlecter.”

“Who wants to know?”

I handed the man a business card, one selected from a variety I keep for

most purposes. It said, “Dashiell Condon, Attorney at Law.” It also listed a phone

number, which was actually the Mayor of New York’s office number. That should

be good for laughs in a day or two.

“I ain’t sure what his room number is. He ain’t been here long.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 66

I said, “Look it up.”

He paused, his head cocked to one side. “I don’t know. He might not want

any visitors.”

I pulled out my money clip and peeled off a five spot. “Here’s five dollars.

That’s all you’re going to get, so cut the bullshit.”

He didn’t need to refer to the register. “3-B.”

I climbed the dingy stairs to the third floor, looking for 3-B. It was two

doors down from the stairwell. I knocked politely. A muffled voice asked, “Who’s

there?”

I answered, “Dashiell Condon. I’m an attorney. I believe I may have good

news for you.”

The door cracked open. Schlecter peered at me through the two-inch vertical

aperture. “A lawyer with good news? Where the fuck were you twenty years ago?”

“Not here, that’s for sure. Are you going to let me in?”

He opened up and I walked in. The room was filthy. The remnants of

Chinese take-out were on a maple coffee table. The bed was unmade. An empty

quart beer bottle served as an ashtray. It was half full of stubs. There were no chairs.

Dieter looked as though he felt right at home in the clutter. He was as

unmade as his bed. His clothes were dirty. His belt was unfastened, the buckle

swinging as he walked. His prison pallor was still with him.

He sat on the bed and asked, looking at my card, “So what is the good news,

Mr. Condon?”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 67

I set my brief case on top of his dresser, after moving more empty food

containers.

“Mr. Schlecter, did you know the man who tried to shoot you?”

“Hell, no. I mean, I didn’t know who he was until I read about it in the Daily

News. He’s got some kind of grudge against me, says I hurt his mother and his

sister.”

“Well, did you?”

“That was a big fuckin’ misunderstanding. That bitch Maria was leadin’ me

on. When her mama found out, she lied about us. I hurt the mother, but she had it

coming. She tried to kill me. It was self-defense. Then they both lied about me and I

ended up doing nearly twenty years for their lyin’ shit. No tellin’ what they told that

crazy Puerto Rican son of hers.”

I said, “So you were actually innocent of the crime they sent you up for?”

“Damn right. And as soon as I can find Maria, I’ll straighten her ass out

once and for all. But you still ain’t told me what the good news is.”

I could have drawn it out for another few minutes with some cock and bull

crap that would have gotten his hopes up. But I had heard enough. He had no

remorse and intended to do further harm to Maria Santos.

“The happy news is that all your troubles are over.”

He frowned a stupid glower and asked, “What do you mean?”

“Oh, I’m sorry. Did I say your worries were over? I meant the Santos’

family will have no more worries, at least as far as you are concerned.”

“I don’t understand.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 68

I slipped on a pair of gloves, took the pistol with its silencer attached out of

my briefcase and pointed at him. I said, “Of course you don’t, you asshole.”

He had a hard time figuring out what that meant. He seemed surprised to see

a lawyer holding a gun.

I said, “Move over to the chair, Dieter, and sit down.”

“What the hell? What are you doing?”

“Do as I say. Sit down. I want to talk to you.”

He started to make a quick move toward me. I fired the Glock before he had

a chance to complete the maneuver. The round hit his left hand, shattering the

fourth metacarpal bone. He froze, emitting a garbled scream, “Aarghh! You shot

me, you son of a bitch!”

“I’ll shoot you again if you don’t do what I tell you. Now get in the damned

chair and shut up.”

“I’m bleeding. Oh, God, I’m bleeding all over the place.”

“Take the pillowcase off the pillow and wrap it around your hand.”

A flicker of hopefulness crossed his face as he thought I might not kill him.

And in fact, it was not my intention to exterminate him. I don’t kill every one of my

targets. Dieter had not killed anyone, so I had decided to give him a life lesson that

he would never forget.

He wrapped the linen around his hand and stumbled to the wooden chair. I

moved behind him and took out the roll of duct tape. “Now, don’t move, you son of

a bitch, or I’ll blow your head off.” While he was distracted in tending to his
THE HOBBY/McDougal 69

wound, I quickly wrapped the tape around him and the chair back. His arms were

pinned.

Another few wraps and so were his legs. Finally, I ripped off a short piece

and placed it over his mouth. I went back to the briefcase and removed an

expandable police baton, pulling it out to its twenty-one inch length.

I moved directly in front of Dieter. He was sweating with fear and useless

exertions. He was tied down like the pig he was.

“Dieter, I want you to listen to me very carefully. Your life will depend

upon your following my instructions to the letter. First, you are to never, ever have

any contact with Maria Santos, Her mother, Alberta Santos, or Maria’s brother,

Cristofero Santos. Further, you are to never hurt another woman as long as you live.

You get a Goddamned job and stay out of trouble.” I threw that last part in for good

measure.

“Now, I am going to give you some of what you gave Maria and Alberta.

And if you don’t obey the orders I have given you, I will come back, find you and

kill you.

I didn’t ask for a sign of assent from him, but he nodded his head in the

affirmative anyway. For the next ten minutes I worked him over with that baton

until he was barely conscious. His balls throbbed with pain, his arm was broken as

well as some ribs. His nose bled and his eyes were puffed nearly closed. Dealing

with the scumbag that day made me aware of how easy it must be for some police

to drift from apprehension to brutality. When I had completed the job, I dropped the
THE HOBBY/McDougal 70

police baton on the floor next to the chair. No telling what the cops would make of

that when they discovered it.

I hoped that would be the end of Dieter Schlecter, psychotic sadist. If it

were, then the average collective goodness quotient of mankind would have moved

up slightly. Hooray for me, and please, dear reader, no applause.

Two blocks away from the hotel, I used a public pay phone to call 911. I

told the operator that someone was dying in room 3-B at 2201 Driggs, and to send

an ambulance. When she asked me for my name, I told her I didn’t want to get

involved and hung up.

There were others. For instance, the girl in Connecticut who had talked her

boyfriend into killing her parents with an ax, herself got a few whacks. The man in

San Francisco who, in a jealous rage, threw his pregnant wife off the roof of a ten-

story tenement failed also to be able to fly when he went off the top of the same

building. And the fellow who placed a pipe bomb in his neighbor’s mailbox,

thereby removing the unfortunate fellow’s right arm and his head, failed to survive

a detonation while sitting on a similar explosive device.

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 71

Chapter Six

When I’m in town, I never miss the Friday Rotary Club meeting in Oak Hill.

I like it there because, even though I am no longer in office, everyone still calls me

Judge. I often smile to myself since they don’t know how right they are. Then the

day came when my life took another one of those unexpected turns.

I was early for the meeting and took a seat at a table near the back of the

room. My old friend, Precinct Constable Ralph Cotter, and another man sat down

across from me. I recognized Cotter’s companion, Special Agent Donald Grant. I’d

met him at a judicial conference in Austin, where he was a speaker. Grant worked

out of the Dallas office of the FBI and was the Rotary luncheon speaker today. He

was a particularly homely man. Thinning hair above a beefy red face on a chunky

body, the type of build that makes suits rumple. He was around fifty and had

figured in some large cases in the past. One of the biggest was his solving of a

series of armored car robberies that had occurred in several different cities. Grant

had determined that the common denominator was the manufacturer of the trucks. It

turned out that an assembly foreman who installed a new type of rear electronic

door lock in the vehicles had put in identically coded locks in fourteen vehicles. His

cohorts had specially configured remote devices that popped the locks. They simply

walked up and opened the wheeled treasure troves. Guns in hand, they made off

with millions before Agent Grant and his team took them down.

I greeted them. “Hey, fellas, catch any crooks lately?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 72

Cotter tried to smile, but as usual didn’t quite make it. It was hard to tell

when he was scowling, since that was a normal face for him. Even when he was

happy, he rarely wore a grin. People who didn’t know him well often believed he

didn’t like them. This was a bad trait for an elected official, but he overcame that

obstacle by being one of the most effective law enforcement officers in Dallas

County.

Cotter said, “Good to see you, Judge. Agent Grant here was inquiring about

you. Wanted to know if you would be here today. Didn’t know you two were going

steady. Back to your question, Judge, business has been good. And by the way, we

sure miss you in the courtroom. The new guy just doesn’t have your sense of

humor.” He finally grinned as he said to Grant, “You should have seen the jerks

who used to say, ‘I never wrote no hot checks’. The judge would ask them, ‘is that a

confession or, since you are under oath, simply a clever use of the double

negative?’ The deputies used to bet on whether or not the hot check artist would

answer, ‘Duh.’ ‘Duh’ almost always won.”

I was not happy to hear that an FBI agent was asking about me. Hmm.

Grant said, referring to my courtroom humor, “That’s a good one. I’ll have

to remember it. And also to answer your question, we’re covered up too, Judge.

More and more, our focus is on the terrorist threat. Takes some getting used to. The

Bureau has always been the solver of crimes, not really focused on prevention. But

we’re getting there. I’m going to address some of that in my talk today.”

I said, “Well good luck on that. The terrorists seem so damned irrational. I

don’t know how you can get a handle on those people.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 73

Then came a statement I shall probably remember until my dying day. “I’d

like to visit with you after lunch, Judge. Something has come up and I need to

discuss it with you.”

Cotter cocked his head slightly and gave Grant a sidelong glance.

I didn’t like the sound of that. Oh, my, I thought. So his interest in me might

not be a friendly one. The FBI had never before discussed anything with me. Why

would they start now, I wondered. I could think of twenty-one reasons.

Cotter was the program chairman that month. When he introduced Grant he

deadpanned, “I had originally tried to get Benjamin Netanyahu to speak today. He

was polite, but said his schedule wouldn’t permit it. So I thought for a bit about any

other yahoos that might be available, and our speaker for today, FBI Special Agent

Donald Grant, came to mind.” When the guffawing subsided, Grant took the

podium.

During Grant’s talk, he described in some detail his efforts to root out

Middle Eastern murderers right there in North Texas. He also let us Rotarians know

what we could do to thwart their evil plans. Be alert.

What really caught my attention, however, was his description of a new

national file-sharing program.

He described the plan with relish. “Before I close, let me tell you about a

new FBI program. It’s downright amazing. We have set up a section at headquarters

in D.C. that compiles data without initially trying to make any sense out of it. The

process is called link analysis. Connections are made from looking at massive

amounts of random data. It was originally developed by the Pentagon, and has been
THE HOBBY/McDougal 74

effective in the war on terror. The Bureau receives information covering cold case

murder files from local and state law enforcement officers all over the country. The

staff categorizes the information into twenty-eight categories. Some are descriptions

offered by witnesses, types of victims, clues left at the crime scene, license plate

numbers, M.O.’s. A wide assortment of information. The computers are set up to

analyze the info, looking for matches.

“Just this week we have begun to run the crosscheck part of the program to

see if any matches pop up. I’m not at liberty to divulge the results in detail, but I

can tell you we have had four hits on a license plate number of a car owned by a

North Texas man.”

Have you ever sat in church listening to the pastor’s sermon, and begun to

believe he was speaking directly to you? Do you remember the droplets of

incriminating sweat that began to bead your furrowed brow? Well, that same feeling

swept over me while Agent Grant spoke. Was it my imagination, or was he looking

sternly into my eyes?

After his speech, I joined the line to deposit my dirty dishes and silverware

into the plastic tubs on the table next to the kitchen. Grant sidled up to me and

asked, “How did you like the talk, Judge?”

I said, warily, “I was intrigued by the new cold case program. Sounds like a

pretty good one to me.”

As we exited the building, he took my elbow and steered me away from the

crowd. He said, “Yeah, it’s better than good. Which brings me to the reason I want

to visit with you. The license plate hits I mentioned…they were yours, Judge.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 75

He paused, searching my face for something to validate his suspicions.

I am a very good poker player. My face did not give him what he wanted. I

said, “I’ll be damned. My license number? How could that be?”

“I was hoping you might be able to tell me that.”

I shrugged my shoulders, indicating I had no clue.

He said, “Also, as you know, Judge, when you were inducted into the Army

back in the seventies, one of the things that happened to you was that your

fingerprints were taken.”

Oh crap, I thought. Here it comes.

“Well, in one of the cases a scrap of duct tape was found, stuck to the

victim’s clothing. There was a perfect match for your thumb on it.” I knew that was

a con. I never handled duct tape barehanded. I always slipped on a pair of latex

gloves before using it.

We were next to Grant’s Buick. He gently said, “Duncan, You look as

though you need to sit down. Let’s get in my car.” He opened the door and I got in.

Oddly, I was not frightened. I knew that some day I might be arrested, and

had actually worked out in my mind a trial defense that would rely heavily on jury

nullification. I would go public and insist on standing trial for all the assassinations

at the same time. I believed I could convince a jury that I did nothing more nor less

than what the state does with lethal injections. Perhaps I could at least attain a

degree of glory. Errol Flynn, playing George Armstrong Custer in They Died With

Their Boots On, said, “There’s something to be said for glory. When it’s your time

to go, you can take it with you.” Words to live by.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 76

The last thing I would do would be to file an insanity plea. I am not a nut. I

have always been convinced that the elimination of evil is a noble calling. It is a

duty. And what the hell, it’s very fulfilling.

Agent Grant circled the government car and got in on the driver’s side. After

he sat, he turned to me and said, “All the victims were bad guys. What threw us off

the track at first was that the killer’s M.O. was different in nearly every case. And

yet a pattern developed. It was evident, and this is highly unusual, that they were

dispatched in a manner consistent with the crimes they had themselves committed.

A la The Mikado. The punishment should fit the crime. And like Dante wrote in the

Inferno. Have you read Dante?” Before I could let him know that I actually had

read it in college, he said, “He categorized wrongdoing into several circles of Hell.

He theorized that each sin has a specific punishment. I think that is what somebody

was doing, Judge. Meting out specific punishment.”

I said, “You don’t say. Is that murder, or is it justice?”

“You tell me, Judge.”

“Well, since I am not your man and I don’t have the details, I really can’t

say. Who were these people anyway?”

Grant recounted briefly the history and circumstances of death of each of

those he suspected were my candidates. One, which I can’t take credit for (but wish

I could) was the murder of a pedophile in Idaho who had brutally and repeatedly

raped a seven year old boy over a three day period. The child’s anus was so terribly

torn that he nearly bled to death. Devon Carter, the molester, was arrested on

largely circumstantial evidence. He was out on $20,000 bail awaiting trial when he
THE HOBBY/McDougal 77

was found tied across a park picnic table in Dierkes Lake Park in Twin Falls. The

big end of a greased baseball bat had been inserted two feet into his rectum.

Someone had taken a knife and had raised splinters that acted as barbs all around

the bat. It had been pumped in and out of the victim, causing painful tearing, a

bloody mess.

I remembered that park. Coincidentally, I had sat on a bench there and ate

lunch. It was when I had been in town to buy camping supplies, and it must have

been about the time the pederast got his reward. But not administered by me.

Grant had most of the details correct. Where he did not, I was sorely

tempted to fill him in. I had often given advice to defendants in my court to remain

silent as much as possible. Sort of a courtroom Miranda warning. You would be

amazed at how many times a miscreant will dig his way into the jailhouse with his

tongue. When Grant paused, I said nothing.

Finally, he asked, “Does any of this ring a bell?”

I answered cautiously, “Sorry, Donald, but it’s all news to me. I would

think, however, that if you ever catch the perp you should give him a medal.”

Hmm. No laugh.

He said, “Judge, some people might be tempted to say to you, ‘Gotcha’. But

I am not as indelicate as that. I would like to see you tomorrow, somewhere private.

Maybe at your home. I have some files I would like to show you.”

He had not read me my rights, which I took to be a good sign. Still I was

filled with a feeling of trepidation. If ‘Gotcha’ was the operative word, why prolong

the proceedings? I asked, “To what end?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 78

He said, “We’ll go over that tomorrow. Okay?”

I shrugged (bad body language, I know), and replied, “Alright, say about ten

in the morning at my house. You bring the donuts.”

He said, “Fine, I’ll see you then.”

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 79

Chapter Seven

My home is in the southern part of Dallas County, in the quiet burg of

Westville. Our major products are high school football and hanging out. Friday

nights in the fall, half the town can be found in Cougar Stadium, cheering some

years and groaning others. Murder is a very rare commodity there, though some

have vowed to kill the football coach at the end of a losing season.

My wife and I bought our house new in 1987. It has tripled in price. The

saplings everyone planted in their yards back then have, for the most part, matured.

It has become a very attractive area. The neighborhood, once pristinely white, has

slowly integrated as middle class blacks found it. A few people bailed when the first

African-Americans moved in. Too bad for them. Because there are more upscale

blacks than there are nice homes in Westville, the law of supply and demand has

increased property values considerably. Hooray for integration.

A little before ten the morning after my conversation with the Fed, his car

pulled up and parked in front of the house. I watched as he and another man got out

and walked up to the front door. Grant was carrying a briefcase. I waited for their

knock and then opened the door.

Grant handed me a small box marked Dunkin Donuts and said, “Good

morning, Judge. Okay to come in?”

“Certainly. Who’s your pal?”

“This is Joe Waldrip.” No explanation as to who the guy was. He was about

sixty and looked older. His lined, craggy face had the gray pallor of impending
THE HOBBY/McDougal 80

death. His suit was three sizes too big. As we shook I noticed his hands were waxy,

as if he had been prematurely embalmed.

I led them into the kitchen and gestured for them to have a seat at the dinette

table. I set out three mugs and took the coffee pot off the stove and set it on a trivet.

After getting cream from the refrigerator, I sat down. Waldrip picked up the pot and

poured for all of us. When he picked up his mug, he cupped it with both hands, as if

to warm his palms.

Grant put his case on an empty chair and snapped it open. He pulled a

manila folder from it and handed it to me. Inside were a hundred or so pages,

interspersed with many familiar photos. Held in place by an Acco fastener, they

appeared to be in chronological order. I flipped the sheets slowly. Before I had gone

through a dozen of the pages it became abundantly clear that my ass had been

nailed. I continued through the folder for about ten minutes and then closed it.

There were sixteen cases in it, eleven of them for which I could take credit, though I

was not about to begin bragging about them. I slid the folder across the table to the

FBI agent.

I smiled and said, “Very interesting, Don. I assume you believe I may have

some knowledge of these cases. If so, why am I not in an interrogation room

downtown instead of here?”

He didn’t answer immediately. Both he and Waldrip stared at me, as if

examining a specimen, an interesting beetle stuck with a pin to a board. I could hear

the cicadas whirring outside the window. The grandfather clock in the adjacent
THE HOBBY/McDougal 81

living room ticked, ticked, ticked loudly, like Poe’s Telltale Heart. They were

waiting for my confession. I was not ready to cooperate.

Finally, Agent Grant said, “We have you solidly on seven of them. We have

strong leads being developed on the rest. You know us, Judge. The FBI never loses.

We always get our man.” If this was a bluff, it was a good one.

Trying not to bluster, I said as casually as I could, “Well, you are off the

mark on these. I know law enforcement doesn’t believe in coincidences, but that is

what is evident here. For instance, I visit Idaho fairly frequently. My cousins are

ranchers near Glenns Ferry and it is a great place in which to vacation. And my

daughter and her husband live in Brooklyn, New York, so I am in and out of New

Jersey a lot. As for the drug dealer that was dispatched in Corpus Christi, I have

friends there. Old high school pals that still keep in touch.” (That part is true.

However I didn’t visit with any friends when I shot a double dose of heroin into

Senor Alfredo Montemayor’s arm.)

Grant said, “Your thumbprint on the duct tape is not a coincidence. It’s

evidence.”

I didn’t believe for a minute that they really had that piece of tape. I had not

been that careless. Again, I had never handled tape without latex gloves.

I said, “There is no print. What else, Don?”

Again, the cicadas and the clock took over. Then Waldrip finally started to

speak up, but was gripped instead by a paroxysm of coughing. It finally subsided

and he pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped small flecks pf phlegm
THE HOBBY/McDougal 82

from his lips. Leaning forward he said, “Sorry about that. Anyway, Judge, this

might not be as bad as you probably think it is. There is a way out of this mess.”

Grant looked at Waldrip and held up a cautionary hand. Waldrip moved

back in his seat.

I said, “Mess? I don’t think there is any sort of trouble. If there were, we

wouldn’t be here drinking coffee. Just what is all this about?”

Don Grant said, “Well, maybe I was mistaken about the tape. But don’t get

me wrong. If we’re right, you have provided a real public service. Perhaps you were

merely exorcising your demons.”

I laughed. “So, if that’s true, then where’s the gratitude? And Don, my

demons might also be yours.”

Agent Grant paused as he looked around, visually changing the subject. He

said, “Nice house. Been here long, Judge?”

I answered, “You know how long, Don. You also know my social security

number, the citations I earned in the army, my anniversary date and every other bit

of minutiae in my life. So, what do you want?”

He said, “You’re right, of course. I even know your high school nickname.

They called you Rattlesnake because you dated girls prolifically and

indiscriminately. As the saying goes, a rattlesnake will strike at anything and so,

apparently, did you. But back to the main subject. Assuming for the moment that

you really are guilty of having assassinated a segment of the scum of the earth, I

have to say that you did a pretty good job. The people who were eliminated were

not pussies. They were, for the most part, mean as hell. That makes you either very
THE HOBBY/McDougal 83

smart or very lucky. Moreover, it credits you with the capability to be a valuable

asset…to some.”

I frowned. Asset? What did that mean?

A thrust, a parry, we danced about.

“Assuming also, and hypothetically, that I have even an inkling of what you

are talking about, how does that make me an ‘asset’? And for whom?”

Grant said, taking off on another tangent, “Judge, you were in the army.

From a soldier’s perspective, how should a war be fought?”

I answered, “An enlisted man does not view the big picture that a general

sees. The grunt is in the meat grinder, and he knows that if he doesn’t kill some son

of a bitch, then that SOB will probably kill him. It’s not rocket science. Individuals

doing what they are supposed to do win battles. If enough battles are won, a theater

engagement is won, and inevitably, the war is won.”

“You’re right, of course. But what would that soldier do if he knew who an

enemy combatant was, he could see him, and his superior officers told him not to

shoot? Suppose courtrooms were to be set up in tents all along the front line and

suppose further that our soldiers were ordered to arrest the enemy and turn him over

for trial?”

“We could not win a war like that. What’s your point?”

“The fact is that the so-called war on terror is, for the most part, being

fought that way, at least here at home. I can name dozens of terrorists right now,

operating clandestinely here in the U.S., whom we can’t touch. The reasons are

many, but most often it is because they haven’t actually killed as yet. If we can
THE HOBBY/McDougal 84

prove them guilty of conspiracy, or if we catch them with bomb-making materials,

we can bring them in. When we do, they clam up and the rats we missed scurry

down a different rat hole. And the Imams who preach Jihad in the mosques, who

say it is the duty of all Muslims to murder us…well, those bastards are getting off

Scot free. The powers that be are too politically correct to stop them.”

Waldrip interjected, “The really bad guys are acting with impunity. They

don’t think they can be arrested and they are usually correct in that assumption.

They’re also arrogant as hell.”

Grant said, “I have come to the conclusion that there is really only one way

to throw a monkey wrench into their terrorist machinery. It’s simply to kill them.

Skip the warrants and the fucking trials.”

He paused, studying me carefully for a reaction to that statement. A slight

smile on my face must have been the feedback he was looking for. “Does that

suggestion tickle your funny bone, Judge?”

“I’m a good listener. I’ll laugh at almost anything. But as for your statement,

well, I’m shocked…shocked, I say, that you would suggest such a thing, Don.”

Now he laughed. “Sure you are. Why, you wouldn’t hurt a fly, would you?”

I said, “ Not unless it was resting on a child molester’s nose.”

He nodded. “Of course.”

I was tiring of the waltz. I asked, “This is leading where?”

He said, “Okay. Here it is. There are some people who are fed up with the

namby-pamby non-war on terror that the administration is waging here at home.

The Supreme Court has dealt us bad cards and we don’t want to play them. Our
THE HOBBY/McDougal 85

small organization has plans to correct that. I would like to tell you more but can’t

until we get something straight between us.”

I thought I could see where this was going. By now, It was clear that these

guys knew exactly what I had been up to, and I was about to become a draftee once

again in a new army and a different war.

“The truth is, we’ve got enough to indict you tomorrow, if we wish to. It

would pain me to do so. I have admiration for what you have done, that you had the

balls to do it. But we simply can’t look the other way, unless…”

Hang on, folks. Here it comes.

I said, “Unless…”

“Unless you would like to join us. “

“Uncle Sam wants me?”

“Not exactly, Judge. But I’m sure he will appreciate your service.”

“Aside from your admiration of my alleged talents, what else makes me a

candidate for membership?”

“Good question. One of your desirable attributes is your knowledge of Farsi.

I know that your in-laws are Iranian-American and that you learned the language to

get along with your wife’s folks, who were from the old country. Many of the

people we are going to deal with are also fluent in that tongue. Another thing you

have going for you is your almost uncanny ability to gain people’s trust. In your

case, perhaps too much. And we also like your style. You have a flair for dispensing

real justice.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 86

I thought for a moment, then asked, “The FBI is not aware of what you are

doing, is it?”

Don said, “That’s classified, Judge. However, I’m FBI and I know about it,

don’t I?”

“You referred to a ‘small’ organization. I wouldn’t call the FBI undersized.

Just who, or what, is your group? And will I meet any of them?”

“You will meet only those whom it is necessary to for you to know. I’ll

decide that.”

“What happens if I turn you down?”

Joe Waldrip said, “Then you’re fucked.”

I said, “A trial might be fun. The trial of the century.”

Waldrip said wryly, “You’ll get the same trial your victims got. Don will

read the eulogy at your funeral. It will be a wonderful affair. You would be proud.”

I softly drummed the fingers of my left hand on the table. ”I have several

questions, of course, and more will occur in the next day or so. Why don’t we

recess this kangaroo court until tomorrow. We can iron out the details then.”

Grant said, “Okay. We’ll meet you inside the Galleria Mall. There’s a bench

outside the entrance to Nordstrom’s on the lower level. Ten o’clock in the a.m.”

Before the arrival of my guests, I had taped a holster under the kitchen table.

The Glock was there. I did not plan to shoot anyone, but rather, to illustrate that I

was not an easy mark. “Fine. I’ll see you then.” I slid the pistol from the holster and

lifted it above the table, then laid it next my coffee cup. “You fellows are a bit
THE HOBBY/McDougal 87

rusty. I hope you are more cautious when you are dealing with real crooks, and not

with amateurs like me.”

They both were transfixed on the gun like a priest on a golden crucifix.

Finally Waldrip guffawed, “Damn, Judge, I knew you were the man for the job.”

Don said, somewhat red-faced, “Yeah, you got us for sure. Ha, ha. We’ll see

you tomorrow.”

We got up and I ushered them out the door. I watched as they got in their

unmarked Buick and pulled away. It occurred to me that if I went along with them,

and I probably would (I’m not nuts, you know), that I might also be on a payroll.

That would be nice.

I went back to the kitchen and got a plastic baggie out of a drawer.

Carefully, I put Waldrip’s cup into the plastic bag and zipped it shut.

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 88

Chapter Eight

The Galleria would not have been my first choice for our meeting. It is

usually packed with shoppers. I rarely go there without running into someone I

know. When I found the bench where I was to wait, it was occupied by a young

African-American guy. He was dressed in hip-hop fashion, complete with ball cap

turned sideways. He was listening to an iPod, performing a seated dance to the

music. His skin was an unusual ochre color, with reddish freckles. He glanced at me

with remarkably brilliant blue eyes. As it turned out, our get-together did not take

place there. I received a cell phone call just as I arrived at the appointed place. It

was Grant.

“Change of plans, Judge. We will meet you at the Holiday Inn in

Richardson. Room 208. And don’t use your phone. We are monitoring it.” He hung

up abruptly.

Richardson is a suburb north of Dallas. It is home to Texas Instruments,

about 100, 000 Republicans and twenty-five or so Democrats. I knew the area well,

having attended local G.O.P meetings there several times over the years. As I pulled

into the parking lot at the hotel, I saw Joe Waldrip exit his car and watch me park.

He nodded but made no move to join me. With a hand motion he directed me to go

into the Holiday Inn. I assumed (correctly) that he was checking to see if I was

alone and if I was being followed or surveilled.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 89

I took the elevator to the second floor, found 208 and knocked. After a

moment, Agent Grant let me in. He had thoughtfully set out a couple of Diet Cokes

and a bucket of ice. “Cold drink, Duncan?”

“Yes, thanks.”

Whoops, I thought. He has never before called me by my first name. Is this

good?

The door opened and Waldrip entered. He said, “All clear, Don.”

Grant said, “As I expected. You’re a loner, Duncan. You’d have to be to

have lasted in your business as long as you have. That’s a good thing.”

Waldrip came up behind me and gave me a quick pat down. “No more

funny stuff with the Glock. Okay, Judge?” This caused him to endure another small

coughing spasm.

“Sure. That thing yesterday was just for grins anyway. Someday when I

write a book about this, I’ll really enjoy reporting about the time I got the drop on

the FBI.”

Grant said, “Disabuse yourself of that notion right now. There isn’t going to

be a book, Judge.”

“Okay, fellas. No book. So why don’t you tell me what it is I won’t be

writing about.”

Grant leaned back and tented his fingers together. He asked, “What do you

know about the war against terror?”

“Well, I listen to what the President’s people have to say, that we are on the

verge of success, and I also pay attention to the lefties in Congress, who are positive
THE HOBBY/McDougal 90

we are going downhill fast. I suppose the truth is somewhere in between. But I

don’t have an inkling regarding the grand plan, if there is one. I’m not even sure

who the real enemy is.”

Grant said, “The terrorist movement is literally worldwide. What gives our

side some semblance of hope is that the fanatic factions are fragmented,

alliteratively speaking. There are as many agendas as there are terrorist leaders.

Most of them rail against America, the Great Satan, as part of their recruiting

program. The truth is that nearly all of them would rather overthrow the

governments where they operate rather than ours. Its power they want, and power,

like politics, is mostly local. Even the al Qaeda cells have begun to exercise

independence. The leaders of the various movements are as selfish and greedy as

any other politician you can find. They love the authority they have. That’s one

reason why you never hear of one of the high-muckety-mucks strapping on a bomb

and dying for the cause.

“It’s not the Army of Omar in Pakistan or Abu Nidal or Hamas or Hezballah

that we are concerned about. It’s the few organizations that really want to do us

harm, that would like to nuke Manhattan or D.C., that make me sweat. I have come

to the conclusion that the Iranian Revolutionary Guard Corps is the principal

organization in that category. These guys already have the supremacy in Iran.

Nobody can take them on and live to talk about it. It’s regional power they are after

and they see us as the great impediment standing in their way. As far as we can

determine, they support three subset organizations, IRGC-Iraq, IRGC-Syria and

IRGC-U.S.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 91

“Baghdad has signed an agreement with the Iranians that commits the Iraqis

to recognize anyone who has a paper saying they were émigré’s living in Iran to

escape Saddam Hussein. The problem is that the Iranian government is the issuing

authority for the documents. They are flooding Iraq with their agents using the

papers as a subterfuge. In addition, the Iraqis have agreed to let thousands of Iranian

Shi’ites visit the holy cities of Karbala and Najaf in Southern Iraq. No one in Iraq is

keeping track of these people. You can see the problem that creates. A Koran in one

hand and an AK-47 in their suitcase.

“The mission of the Iraqi group is to raise enough hell there that we will

decide to throw in the towel and pull out. We have identified a number of Shiite

leaders in Iraq who are sympathetic to the aims of the Iranian Shiite majority. Some

are prominent in the new Iraqi government. They are working behind the scenes to

derail any progress the government is making.

“And what is worse, the IRGC has decided that even though al Qaeda is

Sunni Muslim, they have enough goals in common that they have entered into an

alliance. When the Taliban fell in Afghanistan, many of Osama bin Laden’s

lieutenants crossed over into Iran. The Iranian government huffed and puffed and

said that they had placed al Qaeda operatives under ‘house arrest’ and that they

would be tried. That was horse shit.

“The Syrian IRGC is there to fuck up the Bathist government just enough to

keep it from grabbing Iraq when we are gone. It is also the conduit organization that

supplies Hezballah. The IRGC long-range goal is a regional Islamic Empire

stretching across the Middle East and totally under their control. They are virulently
THE HOBBY/McDougal 92

anti-Semitic, of course, but killing Jews is not their main goal. Again, the Jew-

baiting rhetoric is part of their conscription effort. Iranian President Mahmoud

Ahmadinejad has already expressed a desire to ‘wipe Israel off the map.’ He claims

that the holocaust never happened. His version of the ‘final solution’ is for

European nations to donate a portion of their land to relocate the nation of Israel.

He is a historical revisionist who insists that Jews are newcomers to the Middle

East. Given the opportunity, he would murder them all. When he gets his nukes, he

might try to do that just for the hell of it. He’s that nuts. At least, that’s our opinion.

His latest claim is that he has thousands of Iranians signed up to become suicide

martyrs. Maybe, maybe not. Anyway, I believe the suicide bomber movement is

nature’s bizarre way to practice eugenics. It eliminates the morons from the general

population.”

I smiled at that. “A bit cynical, aren’t you?”

“This job makes you that way. But back to Ahmadinejad. There are some, I

won’t name them, who think he is practicing economics. They say that every time

Ahmadinejad makes one of his crazy speeches, it unsettles the oil market and the

price of crude goes up. Since Iran is the world’s fourth largest producer of oil, that

directly benefits their economy. I say that’s a stretch. He will kill us if he gets the

chance. Anything to get us to leave the Middle East.”

I interrupted, “That’s all very interesting, but what is your group able to do

about it, and why are you telling me all this?”

Grant responded, “The terrorist leadership is a Hydra, with dozens of local

leaders. The best way to kill a snake is to cut off its head. And therein lies the goal
THE HOBBY/McDougal 93

of our operation. We have targeted three dozen of the select few worldwide who are

their true leaders. Five of them are here in the United States. If we can take out the

ones in the U.S. it will set their scheme back at least ten years, maybe forever. They

are not your average, everyday ragheads. They are sleepers who have moved into

positions of power and influence in American society. If I tell you their names, you

will recognize at least two of them, I’m sure.”

I thought this over, seeing myself assuming the role of Grand High

Executioner. If what Grant said was true, I would need some help. Getting to them

would not be as simple as what I was used to. They would have people around them

who watched out for their welfare and safety. There would be no pop, pop and so

long, pal, with this bunch.

I asked, “And these five would be assigned to me?”

Grant answered, “Well yes, some of them would be yours. Maybe all of

them, we’ll see. Later, after you have polished them off, if you want to continue,

there could be further assignments. But five at the most are all we expect from you.

After that, you’re off the hook, free as a bird.”

“And what happens if the locals grab me? What then?”

“We would take you into federal custody and send you into the witness

protection program. Your career would be through. We would have as much at

stake as you in seeing you out of harm’s way.”

I said, “Okay, assuming I go along with this zany conspiracy, what sort of

assistance can I expect?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 94

Waldrip, who hadn’t said much up to that point, took over. “That would be

my job. I will provide all the info you will need regarding the subjects in question. I

will also supply you with new identities and cover stories. The dossiers we will

hand you are extraordinarily detailed. You’ll know every detail of their lives. And

you will also know why we want them eliminated.”

I leaned back and clasped my hands behind my head. I licked my bottom lip

and otherwise tried to appear unsure of what I was going to say. I knew I was going

to acquiesce, but wanted to get as many concessions out of them as possible before

we shook hands. It would be nice to walk away after I’m through with a million or

so of their cash in the bank Finally, I asked, “Is money a problem, regarding

expenses?”

Waldrip answered, “No sweat. Money is the least of our worries. The group

has plenty.”

I said, “Well, that’s good, because here’s my proposition. I’ll do it, but I

want to be able to improve my lifestyle when it’s all over. It will be necessary for

me to go where I can’t be found. I want to go where nobody, even you guys, can

find me. I’ll tell you where to wire the money. I want $500,000 per hit, tax-free.”

Waldrip frowned. “Are you nuts? We’re getting off the track here. We really

expect you to do this with only a small amount of compensation. We can’t talk our

people into that kind of money.”

Grant waved him to be silent, saying, “Duncan, if you deliver, we have a

deal.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 95

Hmm, I thought. No argument or bitching. Too easy? The tiniest worm of

doubt began to burrow its way into my mind. But the thought of the alternative that

awaited me if I didn’t go along squashed the wriggler flat.

I said, “We do have a deal. Now, who are the five candidates?”

Grant said, “We will give you the identities consecutively, one at a time, as

you complete each assignment. If you are grabbed, it would be a bad thing for you

to know all their names.”

“That makes sense. Who’s first?”

Grant handed me a manila folder. “His name is Alfred Said. He is an officer

in a branch of a foreign bank. It’s located in New York.”

Waldrip said, “Study the material tomorrow. I’ll call you in a couple of days

and give you an address where we can meet. Any questions?”

I stood and tucked the file under my arm. “None now. I’ll wait to hear from

you.”

Grant got to his feet and shook my hand. “No easy outs, Duncan. We’ll live

up to our end of the bargain. You will deal almost exclusively with Joe, but I’ll take

your calls if necessary. And one last thing, amateur hour is over. You’re no longer

an independent agent. Your contract with us requires exclusive rights to your

services. Understood?”

I nodded assent.

“And by the way, Judge, off the record, how many did you actually do?”

“Off the record?”

“Yeah.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 96

I put my hand on Grant’s shoulder and leaned in to whisper in his ear.

“Twenty-one.”

He said softly, “Well I’ll be damned.”

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 97

Chapter Nine

I sat at the desk in my study, with the file and a yellow paper pad, a

magnifying glass and a pen. Even though dusk had not yet arrived, I snapped on the

crookneck lamp and spotted the light directly on the file.

One thing was slowing my enthusiasm for the project. I was beset by a tiny

nagging second thought. Heretofore I had chosen my candidates with the sure

knowledge of their culpability. Now I had to rely on someone else’s choice and on

the information they provided. I would be acting on faith alone – assurance that the

facts were true and accurate. What I would glean from the files would be the

determining factor as to whether I would go forward or not. Still, it was problematic

because it was information put there by someone other than me.

Whoever had prepared the dossier on Alfred Said had felt that it was

necessary to put his life in complete context, which included historical references. I

have had a lifelong fascination with the study of history. The principal lesson I have

learned in my examination of the past is that it makes understanding human

motivation much easier. It is said that there is nothing new under the sun. History

proves that as far as human behavior is concerned, the maxim is probably true. The

culture that shaped Said’s life was one rooted in an ancient civilization, in an ethos

that is the antithesis of modernity. I believe it is one that is hell bent on returning its

devotees to the twelfth century. Which made Said all the more a paradox. A

wealthy successful man who is a cohort of fanatics. But why?


THE HOBBY/McDougal 98

The first page was an 8x10 head shot. He had the look of an Arab sans

burnoose; closely trimmed black beard, dark eyes from which I thought I detected

arrogance melded with malevolence. He was forty-two years old, and had graduated

from New York University with a degree in economics.

He was a banker, the President in charge at Banco J. G. de Honduras, N.A.

in New York City. Why a covert Middle Eastern terrorist was an officer in a Central

American bank was the first question I jotted down. Included in the collection of

papers was a short history of banking in Iran. Even though he was a naturalized

citizen and had never worked in an Iranian bank, it was known that he had a sub

rosa relationship with the Central Bank of the Islamic Republic of Iran.

Mr. Said was a family man. His wife, Ghodsi, was a professor of economics

at New York University. Her photo was in black and white. She wore a chador that

covered her hair, but had no face veil. She was active in OTIIAR, the Organization

To Improve Iranian-American Relations. As far as I could determine, OTIIAR’s

principal purpose seemed to be to throw impediments in the path of American

agencies using the Patriot Act. Madame Said had participated in protests against

racial profiling, even where none existed. The couple had one son, Heydar, a junior

at Princeton University.

As I worked my way through the file, it became clear that Said operated a

complicated scheme to receive money from The Iranian Revolutionary Guard and

disperse it to the cells for which he had responsibility in the U.S. Large sums were

sent periodically by courier from Iran to three separate banks in Switzerland. Later,

cash from those accounts was wired to banks in Toronto, Mexico City and Tokyo
THE HOBBY/McDougal 99

and deposited to sham commercial accounts. Corresponding company accounts

were established at el Banco. Money from the foreign accounts moved to the

corresponding commercial accounts at Banco J. G. de Honduras, N.A. It was easy

enough then for the companies to disperse funds to pay vendor invoices. Those

vendors appeared to be fronts for the cells. It was also evident that the bank, or

someone in the bank, was clearing a ten percent surcharge on all the transactions. I

guessed that was probably Said

I wondered if the bank was a legitimate enterprise that Said had infiltrated.

Or was it a sham depository for the Iranian Revolutionary Guards? It was located

on the second floor of a nondescript structure on Broad Street in the financial

district in Manhattan. Not exactly conducive to attracting the walk-in trade. That

meant that I probably would not be going there under the pretext of opening an

account. More questions to scribble on the pad.

Alfred Said was the second son of Sharzeh and Farideh al-Said. Mr. al-Said

had been the curator of the Shah of Iran’s Museum of Antiquities in Tehran. In

1979, the Shah went off to Panama to die, proof that even kings know when their

number is up. The salubrious air of the Isthmus revived him temporarily,

whereupon he left for Cairo, where the air was not as good. He died there. When the

Shah skipped out, the al-Saids booked passage on the first plane out of Iran. They

took with them four suitcases, three of which were packed with clothes. The fourth

contained certain items of rare historical significance valued at approximately three

million dollars. When it comes to antiquities, good things often do come in small

packages. Had it not been for the Iranian hostage crisis, the State Department would
THE HOBBY/McDougal 100

have required the al-Saids to return the purloined items. Instead, they responded to

back channel demands from the Iranian Minister of Culture by telling him to go

stuff himself, in so many words. The al-Saids left behind all their furniture, two

dogs and their eldest son, Farrokh.

Farrokh al-Said was too busy throwing rocks at the American embassy in

Tehran to accompany the family. According to the account in the file, he became an

influential member of the Iranian Revolutionary Guard. A posed picture of him was

in the folder. He was wearing a burnoose and holding a scimitar above his head.

This was not his regular attire. He was currently a high officer in the Bank of Iran,

in charge of foreign accounts. This included dealing with foreign oil companies

who paid for the resources they purchased from the modern Persian Empire. His

position dovetailed nicely with his brother’s vocation in the States.

Now, back to the principal subject. Alfred Said had few interests outside of

the bank. His one extracurricular passion was sailing, which I thought rather odd for

a former citizen of the desert. He kept a 36-foot Catalina sloop at the HudsonView

Marina in Jersey City, an upscale yachting club with an excellent seafood

restaurant. I made a mental note that here was something that Mr. Said and I had in

common. Eating and sailing. I had been a lake sailor for years, sailing on Lake

Texoma in North Texas. The last boat I had owned was also a Catalina. I liked

Catalinas because they are the “Fords” of boats, a solid production vessel, with

parts readily obtainable. Sailors are a gregarious bunch, sociable beyond the norm. I

figured it was because we were all in the same boat, to coin a phrase. Boating

people love to talk about their disasters or near calamities. Being with other boating
THE HOBBY/McDougal 101

enthusiasts is a great leveler, somewhat like being among your peers in the military.

All skippers are captains. Bankers as well as bakers or candlestick makers … or

judges. Perhaps I could use this common interest to get along side Said, to use a

nautical term. Notes to that effect went onto the pad.

There were photos of the exterior of the building on West 85th Street where

the Saids owned an apartment. Also included was a photograph of the interior of

Mr. Said’s office at the bank. On the wall behind his desk was a large painting of

two America’s Cup boats battling for first place.

I took off my glasses and rubbed my eyes. I snapped off the lamp. While I

had been studying and rereading the file, darkness had taken over. I sat in the gloom

and imagined what the motivation behind Alfred Said’s choice to work against

America could be. He had what very few have obtained. Wealth, influence…a good

life. He was not a stupid man. He could see what the United States really is better

than those persons overseas who plotted our ruin. And yet he chose to side with the

terrorists. I wondered if he was so inextricably bound to them that he couldn’t be

turned. In the half-light, I wrote down that question.

It didn’t seem that religion played a significant role in his life. He visited a

mosque in Brooklyn only infrequently. I assumed that meant he had contacts there,

but information to that effect was not in the folder. A further scribbled note on my

pad.

So if he was not driven by Mohammed, then by what, or by whom?

As I meditated upon Said’s motivation, I pondered my own. I thought,

perhaps I had taken on more than I could handle. My mother, a Saturday night
THE HOBBY/McDougal 102

penny ante poker player, had given me some of the best advice any mom could ever

impart to her son and that was to quit while you’re ahead. It was too late for me to

do that, but I was afraid that in the next few months, I would wish mightily that I

had.

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 103

Chapter Ten

The next morning, I called Ralph Cotter and offered to take him to lunch.

I could detect the hint of a smile in his voice as he said, “If you’re buying,

Judge, you must want something. Come on by about 11:30. I’ll see you then.”

Constable Ralph Cotter presided over the largest precinct in Dallas County.

Those who knew him well recognized that he was the most influential politician in

the area. He was serving in his fourth four-year term. When he had first been

elected, he took over a small office with three deputies and no prospects for glory.

That all changed one day when the constable’s office attempted to serve eviction

papers on a man named John Jefferson Cody. Mr. Cody was of the belief that the

State of Texas was never properly joined to the United States, and was in fact still a

republic. Consequently, he refused to recognize the authority of the constable and

of the justice of the peace court where his eviction case was to be heard. It was

coincidentally, the court over which I presided.

When Deputy Willingham went to the door to serve the paper, he was

greeted by an armed John Cody, who gave the deputy fifteen seconds to get off his

property. He was gone in five.

It was well known that Ralph Cotter did not like people who took the name

of Texas in vain. Consequently, when Deputy Willingham reported back that he had

been shooed off the premises by an armed resident, Constable Cotter decided to

serve the paper himself. What happened next has become folklore in Dallas County.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 104

Cotter put on a white HAZMAT protective suit. He and Deputy Willingham

drove to the Cody residence. They parked their vehicle at the curb. Willingham took

a position behind the car, holding what appeared to be a rifle with a grenade

launcher attached to the muzzle. Cotter walked to the door and knocked. Cody, still

armed, opened the door. He snarled angrily, “Didn’t your half-assed deputy tell you

we ain’t leaving? I don’t recognize your authority, so you get the hell off my door

step.”

Cotter replied calmly, “Can’t do that, Mr. Cody. You threatened my deputy

with a loaded weapon. That right there is against the law, both Republic law and

State of Texas law. So you are under arrest. Put down your rifle and step outside.”

“Like hell I will. Now you get the hell out of here.”

Cotter said, “Mr. Cody, aren’t you curious about why I’m wearing a

HAZMAT suit?”

Cody frowned just a bit as he said, “I really don’t give a shit why you’re

dressed that way.”

Cotter said, “Well, you ought to know it’s because my deputy is about to

fire a grenade in here. It contains deadly Sarin nerve gas. It will kill every living

thing in this house, and very quickly, I might add.”

Cody responded nervously now, “You can’t do that. It’s against the law!

I’ve got rights, by God!”

“And just what law is that, Cody? Where in your Republic law books does it

say I can’t do that?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 105

Cody began to shake with frustration and anger. His breath came heavily as

he tried to formulate a response. “You’re trying to trick me, you son of a bitch. You

know you can’t do this.”

Cotter raised his hand. “When I count to ten, my hand is coming down and

Deputy Willingham will fire. I am not bullshitting you. And holding your breath

won’t help. This stuff can enter the body through the skin. But I digress.

“One.

“Two

“Three.”

“You bastard!”

“Four.

“Five.”

Willingham took careful aim at a window. He shouted, “I’m ready, Chief!”

With his frustration grossly evident, Cody sagged visibly. He lowered his

weapon, stooped and placed it on the doorsill, and stepped outside. His wrists were

placed in front of his body in the criminal position of supplication.

Cotter cuffed him and escorted him to the Constable’s car. He and

Willingham took Cody to the Dallas County Jail and booked him.

Later, when the media got wind of what had occurred, Cotter said, “That’s

really funny. I would never use Sarin gas, even if I had some.”

When the reporter from The Dallas Morning News asked why he wore a

HAZMAT suit in making the arrest, Cotter smiled and replied, “I heard there were
THE HOBBY/McDougal 106

some skunks in there. You can never be too careful around a bunch of polecats.” He

paused, and added, “Oh, by the way, I hope you noticed no one was hurt.”

A Texas Ranger came by a few days later and inventoried Cotter’s weapons.

He reported that no trace of Sarin was found. That ended that matter, but was the

beginning of Constable Cotter’s reputation as a local hero.

There are not a lot of people I would want covering my back. My section

chief in ‘Nam, Sergeant Dotson, was one. Another is Ralph Cotter.

I parked in front of the small sub-courthouse in Oak Hill in a space marked

“Reserved For County Official”. I no longer filled that designation, but I knew

nobody would object. I was doing a number of things lately just because I could get

away with them. I thought to myself, you may have pushed things a bit too far, Pal.

Be careful.

I entered the door that led directly into the constable’s squad room. One wall

was covered with Cotter’s commendations, including a tongue-in-cheek court order

I had authorized when I was on the bench, citing him for bravery. He had gotten

into an argument with the county commissioner in whose district the Justice of the

Peace/Constable precinct lay. The issue was whether or not constables should be

writing traffic citations. The commissioner thought not. He had been getting heat

from officials in the municipalities in Cotter’s precinct who were upset at losing

traffic ticket revenue. Cotter’s position was that he was elected to uphold the law,

and he was by God going to do it whether the commissioner liked it or not. After

weeks of bickering, the commissioner’s court realized that Cotter’s office had

become a major revenue source for county government. They threw in the towel
THE HOBBY/McDougal 107

and I commended Cotter at his annual fund raising barbeque. It didn’t hurt me that I

did it in front of several hundred voters, who loved Cotter and learned to like me.

Surrounding the citations on the wall were several law enforcement shoulder

patches. There were insignia from over two hundred agencies, including one from

Hong Kong and another from Scotland Yard.

I said hello to Stacy Wilkins, the Chief Deputy. “I’ve trapped Ralph with the

offer of a free lunch. Is he ready to go?”

She smiled and said, “He sure is. Go on in.”

Ralph sat with his feet on his desk, a posture he invariably adopted when old

friends or important people dropped in. Look at me, it said. I’m secure in my

position and I’m going to stay that way. That puts me in a place where I can help

you more than you can help me. Cotter was smart with people.

He looked up at me over tented fingers. “Hey, Judge. Good to see ya’.”

“Same here, Pal. You’re looking as prosperous as ever. Are you ready for

some smoked brisket?”

He set his boots on the floor and rose up like a latter day Wyatt Earp,

adjusting his belt and holster as he gained his feet. “Dicke’s okay with you?”

Dicke’s Convenience Store was a small combination grocery and barbecue

joint in South Oak Hill, run by Ma Dicke and her two sons, Little Dicke and Big

Dicke (not their real given names). Texans are funny about names. We once had a

governor named James Hogg who named his daughter Ima. Nowadays he would

have been turned into child protective services for such a callous act. The best part

about Dicke’s, besides the food, were the folks who gathered there. It was a favorite
THE HOBBY/McDougal 108

haunt of South Dallas County officials, elected and otherwise, as well as members

of all the professions, including, on occasion, the oldest one. During every election

cycle, politicians who were running for office beat a path to Dicke’s door, hoping

for a favorable nod from Ma. When I ran the first time she blessed me with the

royal thumbs up. Ralph told me later that she couldn’t stand the incumbent and I

would have had her approval even if I were the doofus of the county. At the time, I

may have been, but I’ve improved somewhat since then.

Ralph ordered for both of us while I visited with the matriarch. I could hear

his banter, which rarely changed. “We want the real meat today, Big. The county

road gang tells me you’ve been going out early and beating them to the squashed

armadillos.”

Little said, “Ralph, they tell me that where you come from, ‘dillo is a

delicacy. I hear your mama serves it on the half-shell.”

I paid Ma for the sandwiches, slaw and two Diet Dr. Peppers. We worked

our way to the back of the adjoining room, slapping a few backs as we went. Ralph

picked a table where we could talk without being overheard.

After a few bites, he asked, “So, Judge, what’s up?”

“I need some help, Ralph. I need some in-depth background on someone.”

Ralph nodded and asked, “Sooner or later?”

“Sooner.”

“Go ahead.”

“His name is Joe Waldrip. He was introduced to me by Don Grant. Grant

said he was ex-FBI. I’m not sure if that’s true or not. And that’s about all I have.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 109

Ralph frowned. “Not much meat on that bone, Judge.”

“Sorry, Ralph, but that’s all I have except for a physical description, and

this.” I pulled a plastic bag from my coat pocket. It contained Waldrip’s coffee cup.

“It has his prints all over it.”

Ralph took the baggie and slipped it into his pocket. “It might help if I knew

a little bit about your relationship with Waldrip. Can’t you give me a little bit more

to go on?”

I really wanted to tell Cotter the whole story. I had begun to feel very lonely

out on the limb where I had found myself. But I knew that would be a disaster. The

last person I would be able to confide in would be an honest cop.

I shrugged. “Wish I could, Pal, but it’s just not in the cards. Maybe later I’ll

be able to do that.”

Cotter ate a bite of his sandwich. “Well, they used the real meat today. More

meat than I’m getting from you.” After an awkward moment, he said, “Okay,

Judge, I’ll run some traps this afternoon and check his prints through AFIS. I’ll call

you in the morning.”

“Thanks, Ralph. Sorry to impose like this, but I really need the

information.”

“No sweat. You are gonna owe me after this.”

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 110

Chapter Eleven

I heard from Ralph that night. He called about ten o’clock and said, “Judge,

Mr. Waldrip is not who he says he is. There really is a Joe Waldrip who is ex-FBI.

He retired as Agent-In-Charge of the Denver field office. He lives in San Jose,

Costa Rica, now. He was there all last week for certain. Which leads me to the

identity of the fake Waldrip.

“His prints belong to Constantine DeMarco. The closest he ever got to the

FBI was their top ten most wanted list. I’m not sure what you’ve got going with

him, but I don’t like the looks of it. His rap sheet is bad. Dozens of arrests but only

two convictions. Those are big ones, however. He was nailed twice for conspiracy

to commit murder. Background says he was a contract killer, working out of

Detroit. He spent eighteen years in Joliet and was released in 1999. He never

reported to his P.O. He just disappeared after that. The only reason I can conjure up

for him to be associated with Grant is that the FBI has recruited him for some sort

of covert work. Bottom line, old friend, is that I wouldn’t trust this guy to feed my

dog.”

I was not feeling happy. I tried to sound casually interested as I said, “Hmm.

Strange stuff. I’m glad I asked you to check on it. Let me give you my home fax

number. Could you send me a copy of his sheet and his mug shot?”

“Sure thing, Judge. I’ll shoot it out right away. Be careful.”

“Thanks. I will. And Ralph, I can’t tell you why, at least not now, but I may

not see you again for a long, long time.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 111

He paused before responding. “I’ll try to make it on visitor’s day. Goodbye,

friend.”

Fifteen minutes later I had a photo not suitable for framing, and a two-page

printout of Mr. DeMarco’s life story. The picture, while not the best, was that of the

man I knew as Joe Waldrip. A bad boy indeed. Now I knew more than Grant

thought I would. But what to do about it? I wished I could take Cotter’s advice and

just back out of the deal. But of course I couldn’t. So I would have to use the

knowledge to my advantage somehow. And in a perverse way, it was comforting to

know a convicted murderer was my backup. I thought I might confront DeMarco at

our next meeting. But to what end?

As I sat sipping coffee in my kitchen, it slowly dawned on me that having a

contract killer following my every move might lead to a denouement that I had not

foreseen. It might be that when I had completed my last assignment for the group, I

might become DeMarco’s next assignment. Not a pleasant thought. The

assassinations I was to complete were more than likely political bombshells. If, for

instance, knowledge of them could bring down a government, then getting rid of me

would be the prudent thing to do. I was becoming a real worry-wart, but never a

dumbass. My knowledge of Demarco’s true identity would remain my secret.

Joe Waldrip called me the next morning. “Duncan, it’s Joe. Have you had a

chance to study that file thoroughly? If so, I figure you might have a question or

two.”

“Yeah, I do.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 112

“Okay, Let’s meet at the Moody Parking Garage on the SMU campus. It’s

across from Moody Coliseum. I’ll be waiting in a green ’99 Towncar. Bring the file

with you. Be there at one.” He hung up without waiting for an answer.

Before I could get out of my chair, the phone rang again. It was Bitsy

Wagnall. At 43, She was a childless widow, and a handsome woman at that. She

had lost her husband in a horrendous traffic accident, the result of a drunken driver

swerving into Greg Wagnall’s lane, killing him instantly. She was clever and a

dedicated Republican volunteer. Her fresh beauty made her a gorgeous addition to

the North Texas body politic. Perhaps it was the commonality of our backgrounds

or our mutual loneliness since the passing of our spouses that had drawn us

together. What began as friendly coffee dates had become a semi-courtship on my

part and was recognized as such by her. She did nothing to discourage me. In the

political milieu of Dallas County, we became an ‘item’. Not quite a steady thing,

but close. Some time later, when I took up my new vocation, our time together

became limited, but more prized. As I became more deeply involved in bringing

raw justice to the world, whether it wanted it or not, our time apart caused Bitsy to

be increasingly impatient with me. I, of course, had not leveled with her. I couldn’t.

And my excuses were seen, I’m sure, as the paper-thin sham that they were. I had

told her that I traveled as part of my research on a book I was writing. More than

once she had hinted that she would like to go with me when I traveled and each

time I had weaseled out of it. I tried to stay in touch with her no matter where I was,

but she wanted more than phone calls and deep down, so did I. I foolishly told

myself, who knows, perhaps when this business is completed…


THE HOBBY/McDougal 113

Bitsy said, “Duncan, you’re as difficult to get a hold of as money. Where in

the world have you been this time?”

I purposely sounded flippant as I said, “Well, Bitsy, m’love, it was Idaho

this time.”

Her words took on a stiletto-like sharpness. “A fun trip, I presume.”

I was glad she could not see my expression. I was in an uncomfortable box

of my own construction without an obvious exit. “No, it had to do with research

again. And the hell of it is I have to leave right away, this time for New York.”

“Oh, not immediately I hope. I wanted to invite you to go with me to the

Dallas Music Hall. They’re playing a revival of ‘Showboat’.”

I was tempted to take her up on the offer, but I couldn’t. “Bitsy, I can’t think

of anything I would rather do, but there’s simply no way. Let me take a rain check

and I’ll call you as soon as I’m back in town.”

“If you can’t, you can’t. Do call me.” It was obvious that I had chapped her.

I could hear the disappointment in her voice.

I was really beginning to regret my course. “I will, I promise. And thanks

for thinking of me. I love ‘Showboat’. It would have been fun.”

“Yes, it would have been. Goodbye.”

“’Bye.”

It might be a year or more before I would be through with my assignments,

and returning to Dallas permanently was not going to be probable. My life was

getting more screwed up by the day. When I had originally embarked on this

crusade against evil and malevolence, it was much as if I had rejoined the military.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 114

Now I would again leave hearth and home for a long time. That included the

abandonment of friends. Dear friends. If you have comrades you have come to love,

you must realize this was for me the bitterest hurt of all. Friendships are a precious

thing. We are not born into these relationships. They evolve through experience,

supportive behavior, love and trust. That I discarded this part of the heart of my life

is the true test of my devotion. Was it a wise choice? I don’t know, but it was the

one I made.

When I returned from my first war, from Vietnam, I was met by my parents

at the airport and by an ambivalent and sometimes hostile nation. Mom and Dad

were overjoyed to have me back all in one piece. Since they could not see inside my

head they didn’t know that part of me was forever gone, wrested from me in the

paddies and elephant grass of ‘Nam. Most Americans I met later had little first hand

knowledge of the war in which I had been involved. Further, for the most part they

didn’t want to know about it. That was my homecoming. There would be no such

return this time. A different war with no publicity. Me against all the bad guys.

Mano a mano.

I pulled into the Moody Coliseum Garage at Southern Methodist University

thirty minutes early. I wanted to see who might be coming and going and if Joe

Waldrip arrived alone. It was hot in the structure. Early September in Dallas is

usually warm, but this was unseasonably sweltering. The garage was nearly

deserted except for flocks of starlings that fluttered and flittered in and out of the

open sides of the building. It was that time on campus between the end of the

summer session and the arrival of students for the fall semester. The few cars there
THE HOBBY/McDougal 115

probably belonged to coaching staff and folks employed in the gym as support

workers. No one came or went while I waited. Twenty minutes after my arrival,

Waldrip pulled into the slot next to mine. He signaled me to join him in his Lincoln.

He reached back and opened the rear door behind the passenger seat. I got in and

said, “Hot as hell. Why don’t we go find a nice air-conditioned café?”

“No can do, Duncan. I picked this place because no one will bother us, and

because we can see everyone who comes in the garage.”

“Okay. So what’s next?”

“Grant seems to think you are a genius at getting next to people before they

know what’s going on. He says you’re like a chameleon. Me, I’m not sure about

that. But anyway, he says to listen to you and see if you have a plan to take out Mr.

Said. Do you?”

“Maybe. I’ve got some questions first. Answer if you can.

“Top of the list, why is Said an officer in a Central American bank? That

seems out of the ordinary.”

“The home bank of El Banco J.G. de Honduras is a sham organization. It

consists of an office in the back of a bodega in Tegucigalpa. The ‘J.G.’ stands for

Jorge Guzman. He is un abogado, a lawyer. He answers written inquiries, but

conducts no business. Of course, there are very few inquiries. The banco is

chartered by the Honduran government. Said sends a retainer of $2,000 per month

to Guzman. Said operates under the imprimatur of a phony institution. Makes him

appear legitimate.”

I asked next, “How does Said stay in contact with the cells in the U.S.?”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 116

“He doesn’t. He is simply the money man. The bank pays the invoices

submitted by the terrorists. Everything, including shifting money around, is handled

through the mails. No wire transfers for the NSA to pick up on. Said does

occasionally visit the Muslim American Society at a mosque in Brooklyn. We don’t

have anyone in there so we are not sure who he talks to.”

I said, “Alfred Said enjoys the life of a wealthy American. He has lived here

most of his life and can see what a great country this is. He doesn’t seem to be

religiously or ideologically driven. Is there a chance he could be turned?”

Waldrip shook his head. “We don’t believe so. Even if we did, it would

probably not be worth the trouble. It is much simpler to kill him. That’s what we

want done.”

“Have you given any thought to possible unintended consequences? Some

of those results might be good, and some not satisfactory at all. Now, what if we

knock off Said and he is replaced somewhere else in the system by someone of

whom you have no knowledge. Couldn’t this unintended outcome work to your

detriment? At least you know what Said is doing. You can use him to your

advantage if he is alive.”

Waldrip shook his head in the negative. “Judge, you’ve missed the point.

When he dies it will send shock waves throughout the terror network in the U.S. It

will do so because we will let them know it was not by some accident that he was

killed. They will know it was deliberate and that more is to come.”

I gave that some thought and then said, “Okay, I get it. I am to be your

terrorist.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 117

Waldrip smiled. “Now you’ve got it. What else do you want to know?”

I said, “Tell me what actual terroristic acts have been committed by the

people receiving funds from Said. I have to be sure that these individuals are the

bastards you say they are.”

“Grant thought you might ask about that. He said if you did to give you

this.”

He handed me a manila folder. I looked through it. It proved conclusively

that monies from Said had paid for flight lessons for four of the 9/11 hijackers. It

also provided strong evidence that Said’s funds had been used to purchase over two

tons of high nitrate fertilizer which were sitting as yet unused in a warehouse in

Bayonne, New Jersey. There was also convincing substantiation that two weapons

bought by members of a radical Islamic mosque in Detroit had been used to murder

three police officers. Altogether, over two dozen instances were listed, many of

which had backup verification consisting of either newspaper clippings, FBI files or

witness testimony, extracted from court records.

When I finished examining the material, I handed the folder back to

Waldrip. “Okay. Thanks.”

Waldrip asked, “What else?”

I said, “That about covers it. Now, I’ve given some thought to how I might

meet Mr. Said. Since the bank is a bullshit institution, I can’t go in to open a

Christmas account. However, I have one interest in common with him. We both are

sailing enthusiasts. I believe I can get next to him by exploiting that.”

“Go on. That sounds like a plan.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 118

I spent the next thirty minutes detailing my strategy. Joe took notes on a

yellow pad as I talked. I could tell that Joe was becoming enthused. It was also

evident to me that he was a journeyman and not an architect. I was going to get

little or no help in devising schemes. That was going to be left to me. He would

supply the materials and personnel I would require to be able to pull them off.

When I was through, he said, “Duncan, I believe this will work. I’ll have

everything you need. I’ll call when it’s ready.”

“We need to move fairly quickly. There are only a few months left in the

New York sailing season.”

He said, “I’m on it. It’ll take about a week. You will have a new identity,

complete with passport, birth certificate, Army DD214 and everything else a man

might accumulate in a lifetime.” He handed me an envelope. “This is expense

money to get you started. Don’t go to Vegas.” He started to laugh at his own joke,

but endured a small coughing fit instead.

I opened the door of the car and got out. Joe drove slowly out of the garage.

I got into my car and turned on the air conditioner. The starlings had left two milky

deposits on my windshield. If this was an omen, it was not a pretty one. The ball

was rolling, and I was feeling the old excitement forming in my gut. Or maybe it

was the chili I had had for lunch.

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 119

Chapter Twelve

The euphoria of youth is a precious thing. When we are young, we don’t

recognize it as such, which is a shame. We would certainly appreciate it more if we

did. When I was in my twenties, life was a quest, an adventure driven by daydreams

leading somewhere not over the rainbow but into that great land called success.

What made it exciting was the uncertainty of it all. It was as though my early

existence was nestled somewhere in a rack of billiard balls waiting for the cue ball

to release it and send it careening on its way. Now the vagueness is gone. Because

the distance between now and the finishing line is shorter I can see where I am

headed almost as if I were clairvoyant. And while that takes some of the fun out of

it, life experience also takes a good bit of the risk away.

As I contemplated the evil Alfred Said, my mind anticipated the future

meeting, the friendly overtures, the camaraderie leading to the fatal denouement.

Careful planning had served me well up to now, and would with Said as well, I was

sure. While I was always mindful of the words of Robert Burns, “The best laid

plans o’ mice an’ men gang aft a-gley,” my record of twenty-one and zero might

have justified a feeling of overconfidence.

When I got home I opened the packet Waldrip had given me. It contained a

cashier’s check for twenty thousand dollars. Nice walking around money, indeed.

On an impulse, I decided to begin my escape plans immediately, so that when the

time came to disappear I would be totally prepared. I Googled Swiss banks on my

PC and got a complete listing. I chose the GBL Kantonalbank in Zurich. I dialed the
THE HOBBY/McDougal 120

overseas operator and asked for +555.82 244 67 22. I heard a pleasant female voice

on the other end announce the name of the bank. I asked to speak to an account

executive who spoke English. She replied in English, “One moment please. That

will be Herr Draughter.”

Herr Draughter was most solicitous, his unctuousness sounding very banker-

like. “How may I help you, Mr. Travis?”

“I wish to open a numbered account.”

“Of course. And in what amount?”

I had decided to transfer a chunk of my personal savings to begin with.

“Two hundred thousand American. More later.”

“That is most satisfactory. We have certain requirements which I am

prepared to relate to you.”

I smiled at his prissy European urbane discourse. “I would expect that you

have conditions. Please list them.”

“First, where is your domicile?”

“Dallas, Texas, in the U.S.A.”

“Excellent. We are represented in your city by International Financial

Services.” He gave me a name and local phone number. “Contact Mr. Weber there

and he will give you our bank’s routing information. It will also be necessary for

you to fax him a copy of the I.D. page of your passport. He in turn will provide to

you a code key that you must use to decode your account number. We will wire you

a set of numbers for that purpose. Is all this clear, Mr. Travis?”

“Yes.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 121

“Good. When you have the information you need in order to transfer funds,

please do so at your convenience.”

By the following morning I had an account in Zurich. Everything worked as

smoothly as a…well, as smoothly as a Swiss watch.

With that completed, I called Bitsy Wagnall. “Bitsy, my plans have changed

slightly. How would you like a trip to the Caribbean?”

Bitsy was not one to waste time on being falsely miffed. “It will take me

thirty minutes to pack.”

“Bitsy, I’m sorry about…”

She interrupted, “I know.”

I said, “I’ll make the flight arrangements and get back to you shortly.”

“Duncan, you wouldn’t know this, but I still look pretty good in a bikini. I’ll

be ready when you call.”

My Lord, I thought as we disconnected, what in hell am I doing? Suddenly,

I’m acting as though I’m James Bond’s older brother. This was not simply living on

the edge. This was ripping along toward the rim of the Grand Canyon with no

brakes and taking an innocent passenger with me.

I almost picked up the phone to get Bitsy back and call it off. But my stupid

side cancelled the thought. Instead, I called Callejo Travel. I booked two tickets to

Grand Cayman Island, and a room at the Grand Carib Resort. Deborah Callejo was

an old friend who had utilized my court for many years to collect hot checks given

her by travelers looking for a free ride. I would drop a check for her in the mail at

DFW Airport. I didn’t want to leave a credit card trail. I had the growing impression
THE HOBBY/McDougal 122

that I was living on borrowed time. I hadn’t felt that way since ‘Nam. The

impression was more profound this time, tempered perhaps by experience. And this

time, it would be without a helmet.

I decided to hire a limousine for the trip to the airport. I didn’t want my car

sitting out there for Waldrip or any one else to see. I called Mid-Cities Limo

Service and arranged for them to pick me up outside the Dillard’s store at the Irving

Mall. I set a time with Bitsy for me to pick her up. She was ready when I got there.

She looked absolutely beautiful. She enjoyed keeping her hair short and her skirts

as well.

Some misguided young people reading this narrative probably visualize love

between people in their middle years as a clacking of bones, rubbing of parched

skin against someone else’s dried out epidermis. Well, kids, in actuality it’s really

not much different for us than it is for you. And the emotional part is often

heightened with experience. The second time around can be terrific. After all, who

would turn down a trip to the circus simply because you had gone once before.

Bitsy was traveling light, with only two bags. When we settled into the limo,

she asked, “Any special reason for this trip, Duncan?”

“Sure. I wanted to romance you.”

“That’s very flattering, but I don’t believe a word of it. But that’s okay. I’ll

enjoy the trip anyway.”

She was sharp, for sure. The truth was that to some extent I was using her to

cover the real purpose of the excursion. Anyone who got wind of the ‘vacation’

would believe it was simply Travis having a fling. The reality was that I was going
THE HOBBY/McDougal 123

to the Caymans to open an offshore bank account, one in which I would deposit

funds which later would be transferred to my account in Switzerland. A pass

through account would make it more difficult for someone tracking my funds to

keep up. I know I could have also opened this account by phone, but what fun

would that be? After all, Bitsy and the Caribbean. The perfect exacta.

The limo driver deposited us at Delta’s terminal ‘E’. After checking in we

wandered down toward our gate, with forty-five minutes to spare. My Glock was in

my checked luggage. I intended to declare it in the Caymans.

I saw that she drew glances from other men, and a few women as well. I

observed that she noticed, too. I said, “How about a drink while we’re waiting?”

“That’s a splendid idea. I’m not a great flyer. A little Scotch will help.”

We sat at a quiet table and ordered. She said, “My friends think I’m going to

New York for a shopping trip. I didn’t know if you wanted anyone to know what

we’re really up to.”

“That’s okay, but I really wouldn’t have minded if they knew.”

She smiled. “Well, maybe I would. Duncan, I haven’t been out with anyone

but you in the last two years. It’s not as though I haven’t been asked. I guess I’m

rather picky.”

“I accept that as a compliment.”

“It is.”

“I don’t get many of those any more. Thanks.”

She looked at me quizzically. “How long were you and Dori married,

Duncan?”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 124

“Twenty years.”

“Same as Greg and I. Sometimes it seems as though it had been forever, and

other times, like a week. It’s still a muddle in my mind. I loved Greg, but now I

love…life.”

“I invited you to come with me because I like you, Bitsy, and because we

make a handsome couple. Let’s go with the flow, as the kids say.”

“Yes, let’s do that. If I had long hair I’d let it down.”

We both laughed.

We finished our drinks and went on to the gate. It appeared to me as though

everyone else waiting there was on his way to open a Caymans bank account. It did

not look like a vacation bound bunch. When they announced we could board, Bitsy

and I lined up, passes in hand. It was then that I noticed a young African-American

man in a black suit. As we were entering the gangway, he picked up his brief case

and headed toward the exit, intent on leaving the terminal. He had an unusual ochre

complexion. At the last moment, he turned and winked at me. It wasn’t until the

737’s wheels went up that I remembered who he was. He was the hip-hop guy from

the Galleria Mall. So they knew where I was going.

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 125

Chapter Thirteen

Bitsy hadn’t been kidding about being a white-knuckle flyer. After the drink

cart made its way past us down the aisle, she seemed to perk up as she downed a

double Cutty Sark. She forced a grin as she said, “It’s not that I get airsick, Duncan.

It’s the thought of the wings falling off or the engines quitting or the pilot and co-

pilot dying of food poisoning or the flight attendant going berserk. I’m ordinarily

not afraid of death. But the thought of dying at five hundred miles per hour does get

me going.”

I tried to make light of her phobia. “Don’t worry. If any of those things

happen, your niece is going to be wealthy.”

“Does anything bother you enough to make you sweat?”

“Well, it was hot in Vietnam. I sweated gallons.”

That elicited a smile. “Or was it the hot nights in Saigon?”

“I went through Saigon on the way to the zone. It was in the back of a deuce

and a half truck the day I arrived. The only other time I saw Saigon was on my way

to Da Nang and the flight home. In the interim, I saw lots of people trying to send

me home in a box. Dodging them didn’t leave much time for anything constructive,

like chasing co-deps in the capital.”

“What did you do over there, Duncan? Did you get any medals?”

“I got no medals for bravery. All my citations were only for being there.

Like nearly everyone else, I did my duty and didn’t bug out. I hated it, but

paradoxically, I’m glad now that I went.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 126

“Weren’t you scared while you were there? I can’t imagine what combat

must be like.”

“Yeah, it seems as though in those days I was frightened a lot. In college, I

was scared I would lose my student deferment. When I lost it, I was scared I would

be drafted. When Uncle Sam grabbed me, I was scared I would have to go to ‘Nam.

When I ended up there, I was scared I would be killed. Later, in combat I was

scared I would disgrace myself. In the end, being scared was a positive thing. I

wasn’t killed and I didn’t disgrace myself.”

I didn’t mention the time I crapped my pants or the time I was so damned

petrified that I couldn’t do or say anything or even fire the fifties. Somehow I

thought that might diminish my aura of brave G.I. Or the time Willis pounded on

my helmet and shouted, “Goddammit, Dunc’, shoot the sons of bitches.”

I changed the subject. “Janet Houseman told me you had been a catalogue

model. Now that is something I’d much rather talk about.”

“Actually, that was what I was doing when I met Greg. He was working for

Cantrell Advertising in Dallas. He was an account executive for a Dallas based

clothing line and hired me to wear their clothes in the 1982 Neiman Marcus spring

catalogue. That was the high water mark of my modeling career. A year later I was

married and happy to be a wife.”

“Are you happy now?”

I was, of course, fishing for a compliment. I think I caught one.

She finished her drink in one gulp, then gave me a sidelong glance before

answering. “Yes, very. Did you think I might not be?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 127

“Well, is it because of us?”

She said, “If you must drag it out of me, I will admit I am without shame.

From the first time we met, I felt attracted to you. I was married and I loved my

husband, but I still thought you were something else. Is that understandable?”

I was surprised at her honesty. “Sure, Bitsy, I understand. I’ve had the same

latent feelings about you. I never acted on them for obvious reasons. But it’s like

Dori once told me, ‘The wedding vows require you to love and honor me, but not to

go blind.’ And now I’m feeling as goofy as a teenager.”

Bitsy leaned into me and kissed me. The scent of her cologne and the scotch

were a heady combination. Suddenly, I began to think I could mix business and

pleasure and get away with it. My success in pursuing my new vocation had been

due to my lone ranger attitude. If I didn’t reveal to Bitsy what my life was really all

about, I thought, perhaps I could pull it off. I knew better, but I did want something

that I hadn’t had for a long time. It did occur to me, though, that this path might

screw up Bitsy’s life as well as my own. That would be unfair. Unfair won.

As the plane began its descent to Grand Cayman, Bitsy said, “Duncan, this

is going to be a great adventure. I’m going to love every minute of it.”

We skimmed over incredibly emerald water. It was a paradise rendered in

pastels.

The landing was smooth. I hoped that it was an overture to a fortunate week.

Like beauty, I suppose, happy is as happy does. I determined to enjoy myself if it

killed me. It could have.

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 128

Chapter Fourteen

A week earlier, and eleven hundred miles northwest of our location on

Grand Cayman, Karim al- Hadji, A/K/A Joseph Samuels, had opened his private

mailbox at Postal City in Houston, Texas. He removed a single envelope addressed

to Samuels Imports. The return address indicated it was from El Banco J. G. de

Honduras, N.A. in New York City. Mr Samuels slipped the envelope into his jacket

pocket and stepped outside into the bright late summer Texas sun. He crossed the

parking lot and got into a white panel van. Before he started the engine, Samuels

opened the envelope and pulled out the check it contained. The amount brought a

smile to his thin lips.

He drove to the First National Bank of Houston, where his business account

was located. He converted the check and all but two thousand dollars of the

remaining balance in the account to a single cashier’s check. From the bank he

walked across the parking lot to the Worldwide Travel Agency. He purchased a

round trip ticket to London. The tickets were round trip because he had learned

from media accounts that people who bought one-way tickets were automatically

brought under scrutiny. He had no intention of using the return portion of the fare.

In England, he would purchase another ticket to Berlin. From there he would fly

directly to Tehran. The departure for London was for six P.M., seven days hence on

the 11th.

Two weeks prior to this a shipping container had been dropped at the door

to the small warehouse operated by Samuels Imports. The shipper was Neyram
THE HOBBY/McDougal 129

Pistachios in Masshad, Iran. Joseph Samuels personally broke the U.S. Customs

seal and unloaded the two hundred bags of nuts, carefully setting aside two of the

burlap bags. After pulling down the overhead door and locking it, he ripped open

the two selected sacks. From one, he removed five eight-pound blocks of plastic

explosive, hermetically sealed to avoid detection. From the second, he took blasting

caps, wire and electronic devices, including three cell phones. There was as well a

bomber’s vest with ten pockets, together with a Houston police uniform, carefully

stitched to be accurate in every detail. The nametag on the shirt read ‘R. Martinez’.

Also included was a police issue leather belt and holster, holding a police special

.38. The warehouse contained nothing else except for a Maclaren baby stroller.

Samuels was now the complete terrorist. Before locking the storehouse he stuffed

one pocket of his jacket with pistachios.

Samuels’ neat moustache and swarthy complexion allowed him to pass as a

Mexican, not an unusual sight in Texas. At twenty-eight, he had entered the United

States two years before on a student visa. He was to have enrolled in the University

of Texas Medical School in Galveston. Instead, he disappeared into the free society

of America. He had known little about the country except what the professors at

the University of Tehran, the ‘mother university’, had told him. He had adapted

quickly.

In the beginning, recruiting him for his mission had been relatively easy.

Like many families in Iran under the Shah’s rule, his had been brutalized and nearly

destroyed by SAVAK, the Shah’s vicious secret police. He was taken to safety in

the countryside by his uncle Rahim after agents of SAVAK murdered his mother
THE HOBBY/McDougal 130

and father. He was told that General Nematollah Nassiri, Chief of Savak, had

personally put a bullet in the back of the heads of his parents. When he was later

taught at university that SAVAK had been formed under the guidance of the CIA

and Israel’s secret service, Mossad, all his career dots were finally connected.

However, sometimes life proves to be quirky. Before his arrival in the U.S.

he was prepared to carry out his mission without reservation. Like most spies, he

had a handler, to whom he was required to report all his activities. He had been

vetted by the Iranian Revolutionary Guard before leaving Iran. He had memorized

two years in advance what he was to do. In Tehran he had been told that it would

not be necessary that he receive further input. Once in position, this was not the

case, however. His handler, Seyed Mahmood, who was assigned to the Iranian

Mission to the United Nations, was an obsessive compulsive personality who

pestered Karim incessantly. As far as Mahmood was concerned, the IRG didn’t

have free agents.

Contact between the two became irritatingly frequent. Mahmood called it

fine tuning. Finally, Karim lost his temper.

In a conversation two weeks before the event, Karim told his handler, “I

have decided I will not become a martyr. I am not going to blow myself to

smithereens. If you believe someone has to die to complete the mission, then you

come down here and do it yourself.”

Mahmood was outraged. “What in the name of Allah are you talking about?

Have you become a coward at the last fucking minute?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 131

Karim answered vehemently. “Don’t call me cowardly, Seyed Mahmood. I

don’t see you or the imams or the mullahs or Ahmadinejad or any of the hierarchy

at home rushing out to obey their own fatwahs. I will complete the assignment

without taking a premature trip to paradise. I will do it for the greater glory of

Allah, Iran and even you. I hate the Goddamned Americans and their Jew lackeys

as much as you. Trust me.”

“What has brought this about, Karim al-Hadji? Have you become

Americanized? Is that it?”

“No. Just accept that I want to have some glory here on earth before I have it

in paradise. Anyway, what if my virgins all looked like Golda Maier. No one said

Allah did not have a sense of humor.”

Seyed Mahmood figuratively threw up his hands. “Well, will you be kind

enough to tell me your new plan?”

“Not now. I’ll get back to you in a few days. I have a few details yet to work

out. Again, you’ll have to trust me.”

“I’ll come to Houston. I want to see for myself what is going on. Is it a

woman who has changed your mind?”

Karim al-Hadji replied in guttural tones. “You are not welcome here. Stay

out of this business. When it is over, I will give you all the credit for its success. Do

you understand me, Mahmood?”

The handler breathed a sigh of resignation, “Yes, I understand.”

Samuels had a better plan, one that would be as effective but would not

require the ultimate sacrifice on his part. He would carry it out in his own fashion
THE HOBBY/McDougal 132

and return to Tehran a hero. Perhaps he would find earthly virgins instead of the

seventy-two he had been promised.

This change in plans presented a new problem, however. When he had

entered the U.S., he had used a Jordanian passport and student visa papers provided

by the IRG. Since he had not reported to the university to begin his studies, he

assumed that the American Department of Homeland Security would have by now

flagged his name. If he showed up at an airport with his original passport, intent

upon leaving the country, he might well be on a no-fly list. He began to try to make

contact with someone who might be able to provide a new set of documents. For a

remuneration of one hundred dollars, he was finally given the name of a man at

Esquival Printing, located across from Guadalupe Plaza Park, who ‘might be able to

help.’

When he drove by the address he had been provided, it did not appear to be

a place of business, but rather, was a pastel blue house. The name on the mailbox

read, ‘Jorge Esquival.’ Karim drove to the opposite side of the park and left the van.

He walked across the deserted playground to the Esquival house. He approached

cautiously and knocked on the door. A Hispanic woman answered. She was about

thirty and had a baby perched on her left hip. She held a cigarette between the

thumb and first two fingers of her right hand. The smell of boiling chicken

permeated the air. She did not seem happy to see Karim.

Karim said, “I would like to speak to Mr. Esquival. It’s about business.”

The woman sighed, turned her head and shouted, “Jorge, Un hombre está

aquí verle.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 133

Senor Esquival emerged from the back of the house. He looked at the

woman and jerked his thumb over his shoulder, motioning her to leave. She did.

Esquival appeared to be in his forties. He was a tall, skinny man with a Pancho

Villa mustachio. He wore a tank style undershirt. A Mexican eagle tattoo was on his

shoulder.

“I’m Esquival. Who are you?”

“My name is Karim al-Hadji. You were referred to me by Joseph Contreras.

He said you might be able to help me.”

The Mexican lifted his hand and moved his raised forefinger backwards,

indicating Karim should follow him. They walked through the house and out the

backdoor. Esquival led him across the yard, skirting a muddy wet spot where the

house’s septic tank had backed up. There was a slight, musty odor of sewage. They

went to a ramshackle 2-car garage and Esquival unlocked a side door. Inside was a

dusty Ford Focus with a dented side panel. Esquival chuckled, “That scar on my

auto was caused by cerveza. But don’t worry. We are not going for a ride.”

On the other side of the vehicle was a plasterboard wall with a steel door.

Even before the door was opened, Karim could smell the telltale odor of printer's

ink and benzene. The Mexican pulled a key ring from his pocket and unlocked the

deadbolt in the door. He pushed it open and reached inside for a light switch.

Karim followed him into the other half of the garage. The walls were

finished in white plaster. On a metal table in the center of the room rested a Kodak

Eversmart Supreme II copier, an extremely high-resolution piece of equipment, a

Mac computer, and a Jackson-Hirsh laminator. Next to that was a small offset
THE HOBBY/McDougal 134

printing press. Esquival took a seat at a glass light table and motioned to Karim to

take the stool next to his. Drafting tools, and several pens with different nibs lay

scattered across the surface of the table. In a small shelf unit at one end of the table

were thirty or more bottles of varied color inks. On a larger stand against the wall

were stacks of paper. A small blender and a paper mold were there also, indicating

the printer sometimes made his own paper.

“So what is your story, Mr…I’m sorry. I’ve forgotten your name already.”

“It is Karim al-Hadji. I have not much of a story, only a need for your

services.”

“And that would be for?”

“I entered this country on a student visa. For various reasons, I never

became a student. I am probably on some sort of list now and that is making me

uncomfortable. I need a new passport and a different, more current visa.”

“Perhaps we can alter your old passport. Let me see it.”

Karim pulled the passport from his jacket pocket. Esquival put on a

headband from which protruded a magnifying lens. He pulled the magnification

unit down across his eyes. He looked at the passport very carefully. He opened a

page and held it down on the light table. He flicked a switch and the paper became

transparent as the light shown up and through it. He inspected the leaf meticulously,

turning it over to check both sides. Finally, he pushed the lens back from his eyes

and said, “You know, of course, that this passport is not genuine. If you want a new

one, why don’t you simply go back to your forger?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 135

Naturally, Karim could not do that. The original artist was at IRG

headquarters and never expected to see Karim al-Hadji alive again.

Karim said, “That would not be possible. So, do you want to help me or

not?”

“Of course. And here is what you will need. A new passport. It is surprising

you made it this far with such shoddy workmanship. And a corresponding visa.

Everything will be stamped to indicate you have been in the country only two

weeks. When are you planning to leave?”

“Soon.”

“I suggest we provide you with an entirely new set of papers. Have you used

an alternate identity since you arrived?”

“Yes. I have posed as an importer named Joseph Samuels.”

“Okay. Then perhaps you should be a Canadian importer. A Canadian

passport, birth certificate, driver’s license and a visa. A nice package.”

“How much for all that?”

Esquival decided to highball an amount. “Twenty thousand dollars. Cash.”

Karim shrugged as he said, “It is a very high price, but I am in great need of

your services. I will pay it, if the product is good.”

“It will be better than good. I am the very best in Texas, maybe in the whole

country. You will see. Come back next Sunday at five in the afternoon. Bring the

money with you. And leave your passport here. I will need the picture.”

Karim said, “I’ll be back. And it better be good. As the Americans say,

‘Don’t bullshit me.’ I’ll see you then.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 136

At the appointed date and time Karim repeated his parking procedure,

leaving his van on the opposite side of Guadalupe Plaza Park. He carried a small

briefcase. Today the playground was crowded, with a small pickup soccer game the

center of attention. He heard snatches of conversation, all in Spanish, as he entered

the area. He passed a bench with young Hispanic men drinking Corona beers, their

eyes on senoritas strolling by on the gravel path. Karim skirted the action as if he

were invisible and went directly to Esquival’s house. A knock on the door was

answered by the master forger himself. He smiled and said, “Nice to see you. I have

something for you.”

Karim returned the smile. “And I for you, amigo.”

They returned to the print shop where Jorge spread the prepared documents

across the table. He gave Karim a magnifying glass and said with a pleased grin,

“Check these, Mr. Samuels. They are perfect. You couldn’t get them this good in

Toronto.”

Karim studied the papers for several minutes, finding no flaws. At last he

said, “These do appear to be what you say. Perfect. I have your reward.”

Jorge Esquival leaned forward in anticipation as Karim opened the case. The

Iranian withdrew his police special .38 and shot the Mexican in the chest. Esquival

slumped sideways and slid to the floor, gasping as blood bubbled from his lips.

Karim shot him once more, through the forehead. He collected the papers and

stashed them in the briefcase. With a rag from the case he carefully wiped the

surface of the table and then tossed the cloth in a corner. He took the time to delete

all the files on the Mac, then took Esquival’s key ring and stepped through the
THE HOBBY/McDougal 137

doorway into the other half of the garage. He locked the door and left, circling the

house and turning left at the street. Instead of cutting through the park, he walked

around it. Before getting into his van, tossed Esquival’s keys into a storm drain.

He muttered to himself, “The infidel bastard knew who I was and still wore

a crucifix around his neck. Well, his Jesus didn’t help him today.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 138

Chapter Fifteen

On September 11th and 12th, the Conservative Action Committee of

America would hold its annual convocation in Houston at the George R. Brown

Convention Center. Like most large organizations, they designated the dates and

locations of their meetings years in advance. This information was posted on the

internet and was known, even in Iran. It was at the convention center that Karim

(let’s call him by his real name) was intended to have his rendezvous with the

seventy-two virgins. Of course, those assignations would be delayed somewhat

since Karim was not quite ready for martyrdom.

On the afternoon of the first day of the meeting, at three P.M., African-

American Senator Joseph Hamlin, (R) South Carolina, was to make the keynote

address at the convention. On the platform with him would be five well-known

conservative congressmen and the U.S. Secretary of Education. The Senator would

be introduced by Darwin Linden, the foremost radio talk show host in America,

billed by Darwin’s publicist as ‘the most feared man in the U.S.’ There would be at

least three thousand attendees on hand for the speech. Some in the audience

probably did fear Linden, but only because he tended to talk too long.

Karim’s neighbor at the Houston Palms Apartments was Lakeisha Broadlee,

a young African-American single mother. She and Karim were ‘hello’ and

‘goodbye’ acquaintances. One morning, Karim generously offered Lakeisha a ride

in his van to the Gingerbread Day Care Center where she left her infant son,

Dawson. Since she was running late that day, she was happy to accept. Lugging the
THE HOBBY/McDougal 139

baby’s stroller on and off the bus each day was a hassle she was glad to forego. She

also thought that the swarthy Joseph (as she knew him) was rather handsome,

though his Mexican accent made her laugh sometimes. It was as if he were not

really from Mexico. He also seemed to like children, and had given a cootchy-coo

to Dawson on more than one occasion.

On the morning of the 11th, Karim got out of bed and brewed a cup of

coffee. He watched from his window as Lakeisha and her baby made their way to

the bus stop. Before his second cup, he showered and shaved, smoothing his jet hair

back in the manner that he had found appealing to women. His principal vice, and

he had a few, was the pursuit of the female of the species. He loved everything

about them. Long, short brunette, blond, dumb or smart, he desired them all. His

favorite hunting ground was Bossier City, Louisiana, a few hours from Houston.

Bossier had been a sinful burg for a century or more, a place where straight up

Cajuns and Texans could let their hair down. With the advent of legalized casinos,

it solidified its reputation in that area. A survey of the parking facilities there on any

given day would show thousands of Texas license plates. The average age in the

gambling halls was well over fifty. The Social Security System keeps many an old

person from starving. It also makes casino operators wealthy. Karim’s youthful

good looks made him the exception at the blackjack tables. Getting connected was

rarely a problem. Karim found that terror was a good business. Little work and high

pay. And lots and lots of extracurricular fun.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 140

Now, however, there was more important business to attend to. He dressed

carefully in the policeman’s uniform. It was a good fit. He smiled at his reflection in

the mirror. He made a dashing cop.

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 141

Chapter Sixteen

Clearing customs would have been easier if I had not brought the pistol with

me. The inspector was a fat man with a drooping mustachio. His rumpled khaki

uniform was sweat stained at the collar and under the arms. He did not appear to be

enjoying his job. When I declared the Glock, the examiner’s eyebrows elevated

visibly.

“Do you wish to keep the weapon with you, Mr. Travis, or would you prefer

to check it with us until you leave the Caymans?”

“I would like to keep it. Is that a problem?”

“No, but we do have certain restrictions. You may not carry the pistol on

your person. You must also declare the ammunition you are bringing in and account

for all of it upon departure from our country. If you follow those rules, there will be

no difficulty.”

“I will certainly obey the law. You may have noticed in my papers that I’m

a retired judge. I will not give you cause for worry.”

Bitsy had been standing beside me through this inspection. She put her hand

on my shoulder and asked, “You’re not expecting trouble, are you?”

“No, not at all. I’ve always taken a weapon with me when I travel. It’s just a

habit, I guess.” The one thing I didn’t declare was the Glock’s silencer. It was

secreted in the handle of my suitcase,


THE HOBBY/McDougal 142

After recovering our luggage from the customs people, a friendly black

porter transported it with us to the taxi area. He said, in a singy Jamaican accent, “Is

this your first trip to the Caymans?”

I said, “Yes. We’re here on holiday.”

“And where are you staying?”

“At the Grand Carib.”

“A wise choice. My brother, Alfred, is the bell captain there. I am Roger.

Tell him I said to take very good care of you.”

“I will, indeed. Thanks for the help.” I tipped him a ten spot. I could tell by

his expression that it was too much. I didn’t want to be remembered, and now I

would be. Not a good thing. But I didn’t want Bitsy to think I was a cheapskate,

either. Already, I was beginning to listen to the wrong head. You would think that

by now I had my covert life down pat, but I still made simple mistakes. I sometimes

got the feeling that my luck might be running out like that of a bad baseball team in

the bottom of the ninth. I hoped for extra innings.

We checked into the Grand Carib. The place was awash in a sea of

flowering bushes. Hibiscus with huge blooms and bougainvillea were everywhere.

Bitsy loved it. At the front desk I requested adjoining rooms. I wanted to make

Bitsy feel at ease about our stay. Actually, I wanted both of us to feel that way. I

expected I would need some time alone to take care of business. Well, those were

my thoughts at the time. Again, things seem to go off on a tangent when least

expected, as I would find out later.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 143

The hotel was a cut above, based on Caribbean standards. Air-conditioning

that worked, a terrific view and a room service menu that was outstanding. I

checked it for conch chowder. They had that and conch in four other formats. I love

the stuff.

As luck would have it, Alfred the bell captain had already heard by phone

from his brother about our impending arrival. He personally got us to our rooms and

made the necessary AC checks, TV checks and towel checks, in order to qualify for

a gratuity. I was trapped, so I gave him fifteen dollars. However, it was an

investment, since I thought I might be calling on him to provide some discreet

information later.

Bitsy said she wanted to rest for a while, and we made arrangements to meet

at six for dinner.

Alone, I pulled the slim phone book from the drawer in the nightstand and

riffled the pages until I found the listings for banks. At this juncture, I was flying

blind. I hadn’t a clue as to which institution would best meet my requirements. I

knew there would be no FDIC to cushion my fall if I made the wrong choice. I

decided to make the decision, one that would involve large sums of money, by

asking for a recommendation from that famous financial advisor, Alfred the bell

captain. Dumber decisions have been made, I’m sure. Just ask Amelia Earhart. I

called my new friend, Alfred, on the house phone.

He answered, “This is Alfred. How may I serve you?”

I said, “This is Duncan Travis. I have an unusual request. I’m hoping you

can help me.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 144

“If it is legal, I’m your man.” ‘Man’ sounded like ‘mon.’

“Well, yes, of course. I am thinking about purchasing some property here,

and I wondered what bank you would recommend.”

“Ah, that’s easy. The Benjamin Private Bank in George Town has the very

finest reputation. If I had a sum of money to deposit, I would go there.” He gave me

the phone number before ringing off.

Before I could dial the number, there was a knock on my door. I checked

through the peephole to see if it was someone I knew. The way things were going, I

half expected Joe Waldrip to show up. It was a stranger, a youngish black man in a

suit and tie. Suits and ties in the tropics generally mean trouble. I thought he might

be a cop. Maybe to quiz me more about the Glock and my reasons for having it.

Before I let him in, I decided to hide the pistol where it would be easily accessible if

I needed it. I didn’t know who in the hell that guy was. I slipped the weapon under

the cushion in an armchair. Reluctantly, I opened the door.

The visitor stuck out his hand in a friendly manner, and said in an American,

southern drawl, “Hello, Mr. Travis, I’m Fred Jasper from the American consulate in

George Town. May I come in?”

“Sure, but I would like to see some identification, if you don’t mind. You

know how it is. I’ve read all the State Department warnings to travelers. We can’t

be too careful, can we?”

“Certainly. Can’t say that I blame you.” As he went inside his jacket with

his hand, I tensed up, prepared to … do what? Give him a karate chop? Knock him
THE HOBBY/McDougal 145

out with my powerful right cross? A boxing match with a man half my age was not

my idea of an amusing pastime.

To my relief, he produced a small flat leather case, which opened to reveal

that he was indeed Frederick Jasper, Cultural Attaché at the United States Embassy

in Jamaica, on temporary duty with the U.S. Consulate in the Grand Caymans.

I said, “Come in, Mr. Jasper. May I offer you something from the mini bar?”

“No thanks. I really won’t take much of your time. It seems you have some

influential friends in the States. We received an e-mail this morning from FBI

Special Agent Donald Grant asking us to look you up and to see if there is anything

we might do to make your stay more enjoyable.” He smiled sheepishly. “So, that’s

why I’m here, to let you know that we stand ready to assist you in any way

possible.” He had no clue as to who I was, but he wasn’t taking any chances. If I

were truly a VIP, he wanted to be my friend.

Well, I thought, that’s that. They were on me like an evening gown on J.

Edgar Hoover. I said, “It’s very kind of you to go out of your way like this, but I’m

okay. This trip is strictly for pleasure. We plan to go to the turtle farm and to swim

with the dolphins. Just tourist stuff.”

“Oh, I see. Agent Grant had thought you might need some help with the

local banks. But if not, then I’ll be on my way.”

I said, “Thanks. If you reply to Don Grant, send him my regards.”

We shook hands and he left, happily I assumed. I retrieved the Glock and

fastened it with a strip of duct tape to the bottom of the bathroom counter. It’s not
THE HOBBY/McDougal 146

true that man’s best friend is his dog. For modern men, it’s duct tape. I never leave

home without it.

It was close to six so I showered and dressed in a white tee and jeans. I

called Bitsy’s room. “I’m mucho hungry. How about some dinner?”

We walked down the outside of the hotel, past the pool and the cabana bar.

The dining room was already busy. I could hear a half dozen languages melding

together in a Caribbean mélange, pleasing to the ear but also cautionary. Two of the

people I recognized had been on the plane with us, a robust German man, red-faced

and verbose and a heavyweight blonde with him whom I took to be his wife. She

wasn’t pretty enough to be a mistress. When we entered he nodded in my direction.

Why did he do that, I thought? Does he want to speak to me? Does he have

to speak to me? Am I paranoid? Perhaps all of the above.

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 147

Chapter Seventeen

Karim al-Hadji admired himself in the police uniform. It accentuated his

lean, muscular build.

He had packed a small suitcase the night before. It contained all he would

take with him in his flight from the United States. Included were a change of

clothes, his new passport, plane tickets and an envelope containing the cashier’s

check representing all the remaining funds from the Samuels Imports account, a bit

over thirty thousand dollars. Everything else in the small apartment, including the

hard drive from his computer, had been bagged and taken to the trash the night

before.

He checked his watch. It was nearly one-thirty, time to go. He picked up the

case and took the outside stairs to the parking lot. At the van, he stowed the bag

next to a baby stroller, the one from the warehouse. He took a moment to check the

diaper bag in the bottom of the stroller. A small antenna attached to a cell phone

protruded from the side of the bag. The phone was wired into a detonator that

would trigger the plastic explosive in the bag when he called the cell’s number. He

settled into the driver’s seat and dug into his pants pocket for the van’s ignition key.

As he pulled it out he was startled by a sharp rapping on the glass next to his head.

He looked around, a scowl on his face. The intruder was Frank Wickoff, the

apartment manager. A ‘recovering’ alcoholic, Wickoff would never get better.

Today, he was already half way into the bag, his eyes bleary and his voice slurring

as he said, “Is there a problem I need to know about, officer?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 148

Karim shook his head ‘no’ and started the engine. Wickoff, a confused look

on his grizzled face, said, “Hey, wait a minute. You’re Samuels. Since when did

you join the police force? And your nametag says ‘Martinez’. What in hell is goin’

on here?”

Karim cranked open the side window, his eyes narrowing to malevolent

slits. “None of your fucking business, you drunken piece of Yankee shit.”

Wickoff responded angrily, “Hey, you can’t talk to me that way.”

“Yes, I can, asshole, but what’s the use?” He slipped his .38 out of its

holster and without hesitating, fired a round through the tip of Wickoff’s nose. The

curious manager fell backwards, oozing blood with a .08 alcohol content from the

exit wound in the back of his head. Calmly, Karim dropped the shift lever into drive

and drove out of the parking lot onto the service road running along side the Katy

Freeway. He was beginning to enjoy the day. Wispy clouds, azure sky and

American blood on the ground. He chuckled. That’s the kind of American red,

white and blue he liked. He eased through traffic until he spotted a quiet side street.

He turned the corner there and went two blocks before stopping at the curb.

Reaching behind the passenger’s seat, he lifted two magnetic signs. He got out of

the van and fastened one sign to each side of the paneled van. The signs were

identical and read ‘Houston P.D. – Traffic Division’.

Back in the vehicle, he did a u-turn and headed back for the freeway. He

drove for five minutes before he arrived at the Gingerbread Day Care Center. He

parked in the small circular driveway and got out. He went to the front door of the

frame building, which looked more like an old house than a place of business. A
THE HOBBY/McDougal 149

plywood cutout of a gingerbread man was nailed to wall beside the entrance, its

brown paint faded and cracked. Inside he saw that the structure was in fact

someone’s home. Grubby toys were strewn along the base of the wall to his left. A

television set was on, showing a cartoon with a bird chasing a cat. The bird had an

ax in his hand. The feline looked terrified. Seven small kids sat on the floor

watching the murderous canary. It’s never too early to begin educating a child. He

could hear more than one baby crying in an adjacent room. A woman yelled,

“Becky, go stick a bottle in those kid’s mouths. This headache is killin’ me and that

squallin’ ain’t helpin’.”

A large Becky, with two nipple-tipped bottles in hand, waddled into the

room where Karim stood. She was surprised to find a cop there. Embarrassed, she

said, “Whoops. I didn’t know you was here. What’s up?”

Karim said, “I need to speak to the boss lady. It’s an emergency.”

Becky said, with an alarmed look, “Oh, Lordy, what is it? Are we in danger

or somethin’?”

He looked at her sternly. “No. Now get her in here quickly.”

“Yes, sir, right away, sir.” She moved as quickly as she could into the next

room, shouting, “Doris! Hey, Doris. There’s a cop out here. He says it’s a

‘mergency.”

Doris Johnson, even fatter than her subordinate, lumbered into the room, a

wet rag held to her brow. She said, “Migraine. Hurts like hell. What’s this

‘mergency business all about?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 150

Karim spoke rapidly. “I’m Officer Martinez. Do you have a baby boy here

named Dawson Broadlee?”

Doris nodded yes. “Yeah, we’ve got him.”

“His mother, Lakeisha, has been severely injured in an accident at her work.

She’s in critical condition at the hospital. The family has asked me to pick up little

Dawson and take him there.”

Doris clapped her free hand to her forehead. “Oh, my God. Is it bad? What

happened?”

“I can’t go into it now. I have to rush the baby to the hospital. Please get him

right now.”

“Lord, yes. I’ll get him right away. Oh, this is awful.”

She disappeared into the room where the crying babies were and returned in

a moment with little Dawson. He was one of the criers. She handed the child

together with a diaper bag to Karim. He said, “Thanks. Someone will call you later

today to let you know how Lakeisha is doing.”

Doris said. “Tell her we love her. I hope she’ll be okay.”

“I’ll surely let her know of your concern.”

Outside he opened the rear door of the panel truck and climbed in. He set

the wheel lock on the stroller and strapped Dawson in. He leaned across the

passenger seat and popped open the glove box. He removed a small flat case. He

snapped it open and removed a syringe loaded with a dilute solution of

diphenhydramine hydrochloride, which, if injected into an infant, has a powerful

sedative effect. Karim had obtained the chemical from antihistamine caplets.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 151

Dawson was still sobbing, his nose running mucous from the effort. Karim turned

the child on his side and stuck the needle into his small hip, and injected the drug.

An overdose would be fatal, but that was not his principal concern. He was relying

on advice gleaned from an alternative medicine website that this was the proper

dosage.

He smiled at the baby. “May Allah grant you sweet dreams, my little

friend.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 152

Chapter Eighteen

Karim al-Hadji drove the van onto Interstate 45 and headed downtown. He

checked his Houston street map and made his way to the Avenida de las Americas.

The George R. Brown Convention Center loomed ahead. It had been designed in a

glass and steel retro fashion, a form designed to be fashionable well into the middle

of the 21st century. It might not make it. Hints of rusty steel and cracked glass.

Overuse and a bureaucracy that was stingy when it came to upkeep had taken its

toll.

There were two events taking place simultaneously on the 11th, the

conservative confab and a restaurant trade show. Eight of the loading docks in the

rear of the building were busy unloading trucks for the restaurant group. Karim

parked his van across from the drive-in freight door next to dock fifteen. He stepped

out onto the pavement and went directly to the rear doors of the truck. He glanced

around, making certain that no one was watching him. He reached in and released

the wheel lock on the stroller and pulled it out of the van. After slamming the doors,

he pushed the Maclaren across the avenue and into the cavernous entrance. Before

he reached the elevator, he had to pass a security station. A florid faced white man

manned the post, looking uncomfortable in his too tight uniform. Karim took the ill

fitting clothes to be a good sign, indicating the probability that the man was new on

the job and perhaps could be easily bamboozled.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 153

Karim did not intend to stop unless challenged. The guard appeared to be

puzzled by the appearance of a policeman with a baby. He grinned and said,

“Couldn’t get a babysitter?”

Karim smiled back and said, “No, this is the grandson of one of the speakers

upstairs at the conference. I’m taking him up to his mother.”

The guard shrugged. “I thought they was a bunch of right-wingers.

Wouldn’t expect one of them to be black.”

“I don’t know about that. I’m assigned to the mayor’s detail and I just do

what he says to do. I’ll see you later.”

In the freight elevator, he pushed the button for level three. When the doors

opened, he went past the cafe. There were a few conventioneers there, chattering

about the program for the day. Most attendees were already in the main hall. Karim

pushed little Dawson to the entrance of the George Bush Grand Ballroom, where he

was met by yet another security detail. A man with a very well fitting uniform

stopped Karim. If the first guard’s sloppy uniform had been good news for Karim,

this man’s creased pants and captain’s bars could bode ill.

He spoke to Karim, “Officer, do you have a pass or some sort of convention

credentials?”

Karim thought, this is the test. It all comes down to this. Two years of

preparation could rise or fall depending on how he handled this official. He could

feel the muscles in the back of his neck begin to constrict. Stay calm, he told

himself. “Well, actually no. I’m Officer Martinez, assigned to the mayor’s detail.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 154

He gestured toward the sleeping baby. “This is Senator Hamlin’s grandson. His

mother is in there somewhere and I have been asked to take the baby to her.”

The captain cocked his head and bit his lower lip. “Maybe I should page her

and she can come here to get the child. What’s the mother’s name?”

Karim picked a name out of the air. “Jennifer Watson.”

The security man called someone on his walkie-talkie and requested that he

page Ms. Watson and ask her to report to main door ‘A’. The announcement was

repeated three times with no answer. Karim said, “Look, Captain, my ass is really

going to be in a crack if I don’t get in there and find Ms. Watson. How about it?”

The official reluctantly, and with an audible sigh, said, “Well, okay. On your

way out, let me know for sure that you found her.”

“Will do, and thanks.”

The room was set up with a movable stage at the front and two thousand

metal folding chairs aligned in theater style. A Dixieland band was located to the

right of the stage, the members in candy striped jackets and straw hats. They were

belting out a rendition of a jazzed up Stephen Foster song, ‘Old Black Joe’. They

had not a clue that this was not the best tune to play just before an African

American senator named Joseph Hamlin would take the podium. Most of the seats

were already occupied as late-comers straggled in.

Several young people were serving as convention pages, assisting folks in

finding their seat. Most of the youths had been recruited from local chapters of

Young Campus Conservatives. Karim made his way to the stage area and gestured

to a young girl who wore the blue blazer and pleated red skirt uniform of a female
THE HOBBY/McDougal 155

page. She walked to where he stood with Dawson’s stroller. She said, “My, what a

cute baby. He sure needs his nose wiped, though. He’s got a lot of mucous. Is he

sick?”

“No, he just cried himself to sleep and his nose does that. He’s Senator

Hamlin’s grandson. His mama is going to be here in just a minute to pick him up.

Would you mind watching him until she gets here? I would appreciate it greatly.

I’m supposed to be somewhere else right now.”

The girl replied exuberantly, “Why, yes, I would be happy to do that. Isn’t

that just something, a little VIP baby!” She offered her hand to Karim. ”I’m Rachel

Jacobsen, Officer Martinez. Now you run right along and do your duty. I’ll take

good care of …what did you say his name is?”

Karim stammered slightly as he shook her hand and answered, “It’s

Godfrey, Godfrey Jefferson. And thanks for helping out.”

“My pleasure, officer.”

Karim made his way slowly and deliberately back to entrance ‘A’. He

saluted the captain and said, “I found her. All’s well.”

“Okay. See you.”

He felt a great rush of relief that he had managed to plant the bomb in full

view of thousands and at the exact best spot where it would do the most damage. He

grinned as he thought of his unknowing accomplice, a nice little Jew girl named

Rachel. He stopped at the caterers and bought a Coca Cola. He took it with him

back down the elevator and out to the loading dock. The security man was checking

a bill of lading and only glanced at Karim as he passed by. Karim crossed the street
THE HOBBY/McDougal 156

and climbed into the van. He started the engine and pulled slowly into the traffic.

Just before he entered I-45 which would take him to the Bush Intercontinental

Airport, he pulled into the parking area of a convenience store. From the dashboard

glove box he retrieved a throw-away cell phone. He said aloud, as he dialed a

number, “May it please Allah, may many infidels die today.”

In the Bush Ballroom where the conventioneers were applauding the

introduction of Darwin Linden, a blinding flash and thunderous blast occurred as

the bomb in the stroller detonated. Little baby Dawson and Page Rachel Jacobsen

vaporized. Their bodies become a bloody spray that flew to the fartherest corners of

the room. Eighty-seven people in the first three rows were killed as well. Over one

hundred others were grievously wounded and maimed. Everyone on the stage died

instantly, including Darwin Linden, Senator Hamlin and his wife, five congressmen

and the entire board of directors of the Conservative Action Committee. The captain

in charge of security at the door was blown backwards, blood trickling from his

ears. Torn body parts were glued to the back wall, blood oozing down in a macabre

terrorist art form. Infidel Baptist hearts mingled with infidel Catholic lungs and

infidel Methodist muscle tissue. An infidel grandmother was decapitated, her head

bouncing across the floor like an Iranian soccer ball. Horrendous screams melded

with terrible moans. Brain goo and cardiac matter were scattered everywhere,

giving the lie to the belief of some liberals that conservatives possessed neither.

The wall at stage right blew out and collapsed on the dining area, killing

eight workers and a half-dozen patrons. Ruptured water pipes flooded the area and

shorted out the electrical system for the third level, making the elevators inoperable.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 157

A fire broke out and began to spread toward the back of the building. Workers in

the restaurant show section on the first level fled in a panicked race to the exits.

Karim left the convenience store parking lot as the distant wailing of sirens

echoed. He drove until he came to a large shopping center, where he parked in an

area not crowded with shopper’s cars. He changed clothes in the van and then went

around the outside of the vehicle and removed the magnetic police signs. The signs,

the police uniform, the pistol and the throwaway cell phone were stuffed into two

large plastic garbage bags. Carrying the bags and his suitcase, he walked to a

dumpster adjacent to a large grocery store. The plastic bags went into the trash bin.

He walked around to the entrance to the store and used a public phone to call a cab.

He made a second call to the local NBC television affiliate. When the

operator answered, he asked to speak to someone in the newsroom. His call was

picked up by a reporter who was just about to leave for the blast site. “Jenkins.

Who’s this?”

Karim said, “Record this. I’m the bomber. I won’t repeat any part of this.

I’m a member of Jihad in America. Today’s attack is in retaliation for the thousands

of Muslims America has slaughtered. This is but the first of many such attacks, and

will not stop until America abandons its vicious adventures in the Middle East and

its support of the Zionist murderers.”

The reporter asked, “Who in the hell are you?”

Karim answered, “Not in hell, but you are close. I’m in Houston.” Smiling,

Karim hung up.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 158

Forty-five minutes later he was at the American Airlines terminal where he

would depart for London. As he sat in the waiting area he watched the television

account of the terrible blast. The initial reaction was that it had been caused by a

leaking natural gas pipe. Minutes later, NBC flashed a ‘Breaking News’ banner on

their screen. George Jenkins of their Houston affiliate station stood, mic in hand,

outside the burning convention center. He said breathlessly, “NBC has information

that the disaster may have been the work of a radical Muslim group called Jihad in

America. We have shared the facts we have gathered with the FBI.”

Later, on the plane, the talk was of little else than the terrible disaster that

had occurred in Houston. Karim nodded in solemn agreement when his seatmate

said, “The bastards who did that should be shot on sight. Skip the fucking trial.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 159

Chapter Nineteen

The effusive German in the hotel restaurant was actually a friend of

America. He got up from his table and came to ours. “I am so sorry about the

terrible disaster in your Texas. It is quite shocking. I wish to express my

condolences to an American, to you.”

I was puzzled and said, “I’m sorry, Herr…”

“It is Goebbels. Ludwig Goebbels. No relation to my country’s most famous

liar, thank God. And this is my wife, Helga.”

“Well, you have the best of me. I’m at a loss. You say a disaster?”

“Oh, I thought you must have heard. It seems a terrorist bomber killed many

people at some sort of a political conference in Houston, Texas. Several of your

national legislators died, is what I heard.”

I didn’t know what to say. Bitsy blanched as she asked, “Did you catch any

of the names? I know some people who were supposed to be at that conference.”

The German shook his head in the negative.

She turned to me as she stood. “It was the Conservative Action Committee.

Chet Bascomb was to be there. Darwin Linden was to be a speaker. Let’s go back to

the room. Maybe we can get more from CNN.”

Chet Bascomb was Bitsy’s congressman. She had worked on his campaign

every time he ran. They were good friends. I said, “Sure. Let’s go.” To the German,

I said, “Thank you for your consideration. We’re going to the room, perhaps to call

home.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 160

Believe it or not, Herr Goebbels stood, bowed slightly and clicked his heels

together. “Good night, Herr Travis.”

Only later did I wonder how he knew my name.

Back in the room, we turned on the TV and punched in the number on the

remote for CNN. It was the big story.

The reporter ticked off a list of familiar names. We knew, or knew of, most

of them. Bascomb, his wife and daughter were among the dead. Bitsy picked up the

phone and said, “I’m going to call Margaret Beauchamp.” I nodded

Margaret was one of her closest friends. I heard only Bitsy’s end of the

conversation. It was not good. Her free hand went to her forehead and then wiped

tears from her eyes. Finally, she lowered the receiver to its cradle and turned to me.

“It’s true. They’re all dead. Jenny Creighton and Marge Howie were there, too.

They are missing and presumed dead. Oh God, Duncan, what a horror. I am so

angry. If I could, I would kill the sons of bitches who did this myself.”

I pulled her close and held her for what seemed a long time. It was perhaps

only five minutes, but long enough for the unexpected to take place. In that time I

felt a bond was forged, cemented in a shared hatred. Finally she said, “Let’s get out

of here. I want to go down to the beach. I want to walk for a while.”

We went to the lobby, and on a hunch, I asked if I had any messages. The

clerk, an officious older black man, checked my box.

Without speaking, he handed me a folded piece of paper. On it was written,

“Have a nice day. Your pal, Joe.”

I tucked it into my pocket. Bitsy asked, “Business or pleasure?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 161

“Both, I suppose. A guy I know wishing me a good day. We’re not great

friends. It’s his way of letting me know he resents me being here while he has to

work. Nothing really serious. He’s just a jerk.”

We passed the bar and exited onto the veranda. The moon was full, hanging

low over the horizon like an old illuminated Gulf Oil sign. Bright moonlight was

glistening in dancing diamonds on the surface of the sea, cutting a jiggley path

across the surf just a hundred yards away. A scent of flowers was in the air. The

day’s heat lingered. I felt it down to my bones, and it was first-rate. I have never

been a fan of cold weather. When the time would come to bug out of this current

life, it would be to a southern clime. The warmer the better.

The path to the beach was bordered by cactus thickets and native palms.

Low trees which appeared to be mahogany held small orchids. We passed a small

swampy inlet, with several buttonwood trees. Though I didn’t see it, Bitsy said she

saw a blue iguana scampering through the brush.

On the beach, we trudged through the loose sand until we came to where it

was hard packed by the water and the walking became easier. I wasn’t surprised

when Bitsy took my hand. We strolled that way for a few minutes before she

stopped. I noticed that she had begun to weep again.

She looked at me and said, “This is all so painful. Those dear people. They

deserved so much more from life than to be murdered by some fanatic…”

I said, “I know. I’m mad as hell. And I…” I stopped before I said too much.

Finally, she said, “Duncan, tell me the truth. Why are we really here?”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 162

So here came the big choice. Lie and write her off. Tell the truth and in all

likelihood, write her off anyway. I turned to her and looked into her very inner eye.

I knew that the day I would make my escape from all this, I was going to live out

my life in loneliness. But maybe I wouldn’t have to.

In nearly everyone can be found a desire to have a companion, and if we are

lucky, a love. Odysseus had Penelope, Mark Antony had Cleo, Romeo tried to have

Juliet and, of course, Pierre Curie lucked out when he snared Marie. Two out these

examples ended in tragedy, but fifty percent is not too bad.

We were alone on this stretch of the shore. A weathered, gray log was

nearby. I pointed to it and said, “Let’s sit for a while. I want to discuss something

with you.”

She cocked her head curiously and looked at me. “Something serious?”

“Deadly serious.”

As we sat, she said, “Go ahead.”

“What are your plans for your life, Bitsy?”

She forced a half smile. “Why, Duncan, is this a proposal?”

“Well, not exactly in the way you might expect. If it were, it would require

from you more than just a declaration of love and fidelity. It would be almost like a

blood oath. Oh, hell, that’s not what I mean. I want…need to tell you something

which would require that you promise never to reveal it … ever.”

She hesitated. “I’m not sure I could make a promise like that until I knew

what we were talking about.”

“I understand.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 163

We sat and watched the phosphorescent waves roll in, hissing across the

sand and then receding. Where the water had been, small holes appeared, spurting

out tiny jets of liquid before the next wave covered them up. A small piece of

Styrofoam came and went in the ebb and flow, white against the dark sea, jarring

the harmony of the all-natural beauty. Finally, I said what my heart could no longer

suppress. I bit down hard on my teeth to keep them from betraying my nervousness

with chattering. “Bitsy, it appears I have fallen in love with you.”

After what seemed an interminable time had passed, she said, “Well, I’ll be

damned. I didn’t think I would ever be able to pry that out of you. I…I love you too,

you old coot.”

She touched my cheek and turned my head toward her. She leaned in and

kissed me on the lips. “I hope you didn’t think I would go to the Caymans with just

anybody, Duncan. The reason I asked you out to the theater last week and then

agreed to this trip was because I had decided to make a last ditch effort to ensnare

you with my charms. And now I’m going to acknowledge that life is too short for

B.S. I do want to be with you, and I doubt that there is anything you could tell me

that would dissuade me from that. So, yes, I promise to keep your confidences. Is

that bold enough?”

“Yes, it’s the perfect answer.”

“Are you in trouble, Duncan? Is that why you brought a gun with you on

this trip? Is that what you want to say?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 164

“It’s not that. At least, it’s not anything I can’t resolve. I only brought all

this up because I felt that we might have a future together and if that were to be the

case, there are things you would have to know.”

“Go on.”

Well, says I to me, here we go.

I took a deep breath. “Okay, Bitsy, this is it. This is what I do. It’s the real

reason why I have been traveling so much of late. In this world there are criminals

who are beyond the pale, men and women so cruel and malevolent that the world

would be infinitely better off without them. I know who many of them are. In one

way or another, some have managed to escape justice and, I believe, pose a real

threat to decent people everywhere. I stop them before they can kill, rape or molest

again.”

Her brow furrowed slightly as she began to ask, “But how…?”

There are soft words for what I have done, like ‘eliminate,’ or ’eradicate’. I

opted to tell it without an implied apologetic phrase. I raised my hand slightly and

said softly, “I kill them.”

Her mouth made an ‘O’, but she said nothing. For the next hour and a half I

unloaded. I spent a lot of time on the rationale behind my actions. I didn’t discuss

all of my hits in detail, nor did I talk about the thrill in my gut that living so close to

the edge had aroused. And then I told her about my meetings with Grant and

Waldrip and the arrangement that I had with them. I also told her that I knew that

someday I would have to call it quits. I said that this new phase of my life, this

arrangement with Grant, would lead to the end of the killing. And probably soon.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 165

Finally, I said, “These are things I can’t undo. I have no regrets, but would have if it

caused you to change your mind about me.”

She was silent for a moment, shaking her head slightly. Then she said,

“Dear God, Duncan, I can’t believe it’s really you saying this. You’ve always been

such a gentle man, or at least that’s what I thought. That’s what makes it so hard for

me to reconcile what you’ve told me with who I thought you were. I do remember

Wilma Cordery and what happened to her. I was a high school kid when that man

killed her and drowned her granddaughter in the toilet and, I, like everyone else,

was outraged. When they caught him, my Dad said he could actually pull the switch

on the bastard if they gave him the death penalty. And now you tell me that,

figuratively speaking, you did.”

We sat silently for several minutes. Finally she let out an audible sigh and

took my hand. She said, “Let’s go back to the hotel. I’ve got to think.”

Bitsy went to the door of my room and entered with me. “I don’t want to be

alone. I’m going to stay with you.”

In the room we got ready for bed. I laid down and pulled a single cover over

me. She slid across under the sheet and nestled her head on my shoulder. She said,

“Duncan, if I go with you to wherever it is you are going, I can’t do what you do.

Well, I suppose if our lives depended on it I could, but only then. Do you

understand?”

I answered, “Yes. I wouldn’t expect you to.”

She said, “And when we are through with the forced assignments, you will

really hang up your guns?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 166

“I promise.”

She asked, “Did you ever see Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid?”

“Sure. One of my favorite movies.”

“Well, if you recall, Katherine Ross agreed to go to Bolivia with them

because she was twenty-six, a school teacher in a Podunk town and was bored to

tears. She wanted spice in her life. I have more reasons to go with you than she had

to hang with those two cowboys.”

“Does that mean I’m better looking than Robert Redford?”

She smiled, “What do you think?”

“Probably not.”

“Duncan, I’ll go with you to the end of the road, wherever it takes us. I’ve

had a great life, but never a thrilling one. And I can understand why you wanted to

do the things you have done. I believe many people would do the same things if

they just had the nerve.” Then, deadly seriously, she continued, “Duncan, I’ll help

in non-lethal ways. I’ll watch your back. And who knows, maybe this son of a bitch

Alfred Said is the one who arranged to kill our friends. ”

So we would become partners in a great life and death con game.

“Okay. Your life is going to be turned topsy-turvy. When we’re through,

we’ll have to vanish like a couple of wisps of old smoke up a chimney, to a new

time and place where I hope we will live an extraordinarily comfortable existence.”

She squeezed my hand. “It’s okay, partner. Let’s shake on it. I’m in.”

I pulled her close. “You’ve got a lot to learn. But first, I’ve got a job for

you.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 167

She smiled and kissed me. “That’s easy.” I had meant that she would have

to study the Said file. But perhaps pleasure before business might be a better idea.

I held her long enough to realize that I wouldn’t need Viagra.

We made love like it would be the last time for either one of us. As it turned

out, it wasn’t the last time ever. And neither was the next one an hour later. I was

certain of one thing. I wasn’t going to give this up for anything.

Perhaps it was the exhilaration we both felt, or the softness of the bed, but

we both fell asleep smiling. The sun was rising when Bitsy woke and jostled me

awake.

“This tropical air is working wonders for me. I feel as good as if I had just

had sex.” She giggled at her own joke.

“Sure,” I said. “It must be the air. It makes everything really swell.” That set

us both off, and we laughed like teenagers.

“So what do we do now, Duncan?”

“I’ve been thinking that over. Why don’t we do something really wild …

like getting married?”

She paused before replying, her eyes tearing up. She said, softly, “I do.”

I kissed her with fervor. Lots of fervor. “I’ll call Alfred the Bell Captain

right now to see what we need to do to get hitched in the Caymans.”

Bitsy jumped out of bed and spontaneously clapped her hands. “I’ll need a

new dress. I didn’t bring anything that will do. And I’m not going to get married in

shorts or slacks!”

“And you’ll have one, with a ten-foot train if you want it.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 168

“That’s a bit much, but I think a hat would be a nice touch. Yes, a white,

broad-brimmed straw with a bold red band.” She grabbed me and kissed me again.

“Oh, Duncan, what a life we are going to lead. I do love you.”

I rang for Alfred and asked him what two Americans would require to get

married in the Caymans.

“Ah, Mr. Travis, the tropical love bug has bitten you, yes? It is fortunate you

have called me. By coincidence, my sister, Elena, is the foremost wedding arranger

on Grand Cayman. I will have her call you in just a few minutes.”

“Thanks, Alfred. Somehow I knew you would have the answer.” I suspected

that it wouldn’t have made any difference what the question might have been, good

old Al would have had a solution.

Ten minutes later, Elena was on the line. She told me that we would need to

procure a license from Deputy General’s office in George Town. The official would

need the name of the person who would perform the ceremony. As she gave it to

me, I wrote down the name of Judge Lawrence Blasingame, a local Justice of the

Peace, whom Elena said would recite the vows. She also would make arrangements

for the use of a ‘delightful little gazebo’ located on the end of the hotel’s fishing

pier. Champagne and a small cake would be made available. Her $500 fee would

include everything, except the license. I would have to pay for that myself when we

picked it up. She suggested we catch the minibus to George Town this morning and

have the ceremony at sunset later today.

I relayed all this to Bitsy. I had also obtained the address of the best couture

boutique in Georgetown. It also had occurred to me that if I opened an account at


THE HOBBY/McDougal 169

the Benjamin Private Bank, Joe Waldrop would know about it before the ink was

dry on the signature card. But if Bitsy made the transaction, they might not pick up

on it.

“Let’s get some clothes on. As much as I enjoy looking at you like this, the

hotel restaurant will probably require that we dress for breakfast.”

We dressed slowly, watching each other. In a way, seeing her slip into her

clothes was almost as sensual as seeing her take them off.

Then I put my forefinger upright across my mouth in the international sign

for ‘shush.’ I pointed to the patio door and took her hand. We stepped outside. The

air was heavy, enveloping us in its moist scents. A band of darkness hung on the

northwestern horizon, presaging a rainy front on its way.

I spoke quietly. “After breakfast we will hop on the minibus. After we get

our marriage license, we’ll catch a cab. You get out at Dorothea’s Boutique in

George Town. When you are through shopping, catch a minibus back to the hotel.

Wait fifteen minutes and then get on another bus back to George Town. Go to the

Benjamin Private Bank on Edward Street, across from the post office, and open an

account. I’ll give you a check for fifty thousand. Open it in both our names. Pick up

a signature card for me to sign and mail in later. Tell them you want a pass-through

account and that we will be sending large sums of money which they are to

immediately forward by wire to another account. Tell them that the routing

instructions will come with each deposit. Inform them as well that they should take

three percent of all future deposits as their fee for sending the money along to its

next stop. When you are through, catch a cab and come back here. Got it?”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 170

She appeared thoughtful for a moment before saying, “Yes. And to start this

partnership off right, I’ll put fifty thousand of my money in as well.”

I was going to protest, and then thought better of it. It would be best to have

both of us invested in this joint venture. “Okay, that’s a deal.” And it was.

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 171

Chapter Twenty

The bus, which was actually an oversized van, was crowded with locals

filling all but the two seats Bitsy and I took. The rain indicator I had seen earlier

began to strut its stuff. Tropical sized drops began to splat on the windshield. The

driver turned on his worn wipers which did not seem to be helping much. I tried to

close the window next to me without success. The citizen next to me leaned over

and snapped an aluminum protuberance that held the glass in place. He said to me,

“Try it now, mon.” I did, with a better result.

The laugh for the day came just as we entered the outskirts of Georgetown.

Some tourist with a sense of humor had erected an official looking road sign next to

the thoroughfare, which read, “Snow Emergency Route.” I was still smiling when I

noticed a small black car pull out of a side street and take a position behind us. As

we moved into the city, I also noted that he made all the same stops we did.

We hopped off the bus at the Administration Building on Elgin Avenue and

went in to the Deputy General’s office for our marriage license. There were a few

couples in line ahead of us. Love comes in all sizes and surely has no age limits, but

it did appear that we were the oldest that day. Fifteen minutes later we were back on

the street hailing a cab. Mr. Black Car was waiting for us. He followed our cab as

we stopped across the street from Dorothea’s Boutique and Bitsy gave me a peck on

the cheek as she opened the door. “See ya’.”

After a few minutes I left the taxi across from The Royal Bank of the

Caymans. The driver of the black car pulled to the curb and parked. I decided to
THE HOBBY/McDougal 172

ignore the tail, if that was what it was, since I wanted them to see me go in the

bank. The institution was housed in a large modern building, faced with white

stone. Inside, I went to a desk where an attractive black woman sat. The device on

her desk indicated she was the receptionist. She smiled as I stood in front of her.

“And how may I help you, sir?”

“I would like to speak to someone about opening an account.”

“And your name, sir?”

You could have poured her voice over pancakes. “I’m Duncan Travis.”

She rose and said, “Please come with me.”

She led me to an elevator. We were serenaded with recorded steel band

music as it rose. On level three, the door opened and I was steered to another

receptionist, this one a male. My escort said, “This is Mister Travis. He is interested

in establishing an account here.” She said to me, “Thank you for your interest in our

institution, Mr. Travis.” Before I could reply, she turned and went back to the

elevator.

My new handler smiled and picked up a phone. He punched in two digits.

“Mr. Denton, I have Mr. Travis here. He has expressed an interest in opening a new

account.”

Moments later a rotund black man, about forty, dressed impeccably in a

pinstriped suit which very well might have originated in Savile Row, came out of

his office and introduced himself. “Hello, Mr. Travis. I am Canterbury Denton.

Please, won’t you come in?” He had taken my hand in a firm shake, and had used

his other hand to cup my elbow. He knew his business. I already felt like his sort of
THE HOBBY/McDougal 173

close friend. He stepped to my side so that we moved into the office together, like

pals. The room was quite magnificent. The motif was piscatorial, with two

tremendous aquariums, one on each sidewall. A large bronze sea turtle statue stood

on a pedestal in the center of the room.

As I sat in the low chair in front of his desk, I said, “Canterbury. An unusual

name.”

“Yes, I know. My mother’s master’s thesis was on Chaucer. She loved his

work. I have always been thankful that she wasn’t studying Attila the Hun.” He

laughed at his joke. I’m sure it was at least the hundredth time in his life that he had

done so. I forced a chuckle. We were really hitting it off.

“Now, I believe you are here to open an account?”

“Yes.”

“Well, you have chosen wisely. The Royal Bank is a strong institution, one

with a history of solidity dating back many years. And rest assured, we are the soul

of discretion. Your money and your identity will be safe with us. Unlike the

financial centers in many countries, strong measures have been taken by the

Cayman Islands Government in recent years to protect and enhance the reputation

of the islands as a base for offshore financial operations. This action includes the

signing of a Mutual Legal Assistance Treaty with the United Kingdom and the

United States aimed at narcotics-related and other crime, though specifically

excluding tax offenses, which of course do not exist in the Cayman Islands. Even

though at least 40 of the world's top 50 banks have branches or subsidiaries in the

Cayman Islands, fortuitous circumstances have brought you to the door of the best.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 174

He chuckled, “And may I assume you are not in the narcotics business? Pardon me

for asking, but the law requires that I do so.”

“You assume correctly. And you’ve sold me on your bank. I’m ready to do

business.” I pulled my wallet out and removed a check. “I want to make an initial

deposit of $5,000. Of course, there will be much larger sums later. I am a consultant

and my fees are quite handsome.”

“I quite understand. We appreciate your faith in us and we will not let you

down.”

The truth was that I was setting up a red herring. I was in fact never going to

use the account for any purpose other than to throw people off the scent. I would be

writing off the five grand.

When he had completed the deposit slip and I had chosen a check style, he

asked, “Would you be my guest for lunch? We have a splendid executive dining

room.”

I didn’t want to spend any more time with Canterbury than I had to. The less

he knew about me the better. “That’s very kind of you, Mr. Denton, and under

normal circumstances I would leap at the chance to get a free lunch. But I am

getting married this evening and I have a lot to do before the ceremony.”

“Oh, my, how exciting. My congratulations. Where will the wedding be

performed?”

“At the Grand Carib. And thanks again for the offer of lunch, but I’m sure

you understand.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 175

He stood and proffered his hand again. “I do. Oh, that’s your line, isn’t it.”

We both had a good laugh. I was a bit regretful that I would not see my new pal

again. As I exited the Royal bank, I saw the black car pull out into the traffic and

turn onto Shedden Street and disappear from view.

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 176

Chapter Twenty-one

Karim al-Hadji’s return to Tehran was not quite as he had envisioned it. To

say his superiors were surprised to see him was a massive understatement of the

facts. To say they were happy to find him at their door was very far from the truth.

Seyed Mahmood had conveniently neglected to inform Tehran of Karim’s

announced change of plans and had expressed phony outrage and surprise when he

heard that Karim had arrived in Tehran, resurrected from the dead, as it were.

Karim sat at a gray painted steel table in the basement of IRG Headquarters,

in a sparsely decorated room, the only decoration being a portrait of Ayatollah

Seyed Ali Khamanei. Though he was shivering from the cold, and somewhat from

apprehension, he was seething with rage inside. Across the table from the almost

martyr Karim was Colonel Mansour el Mohammed, the chief of the interrogation

unit of the IRG. He was a stiff-necked martinet, with a sallow complexion

evidencing a lifelong tobacco habit. He took pride in his immense waxed

moustache, and habitually twirled the end of the right side.

He glowered at Karim. “You have disobeyed your orders and jeopardized

the security of this agency. What possessed you to take such a foolhardy chance? If

you had been apprehended, the world would have known it was us and not some

nebulous group. This is a disgrace. You are a coward, Karim al-Hadji, who could

not fulfill a mission for the Prophet as you were instructed. Now tell me, in great

detail, what you did, exactly. Leave nothing out. If there is the slightest possibility

that you left a trail, I must know of it. We cannot craft a plan to divert suspicion
THE HOBBY/McDougal 177

from us if you are not scrupulously honest and accurate.” He raised his voice

irately. “Do I make myself clear?”

Biting his tongue to keep from retorting angrily, Karim answered, “Yes,

Colonel. I will be truthful.”

For the next hour, Karim recounted the plan and its result. Occasionally

embellishing some points to make him appear smarter than he had been. He was

interrupted frequently by the Colonel, who deftly used the technique of repeating

questions to see if he would elicit a different response the second time. Karim stuck

close enough to the facts that he was able to escape trouble in that area. Finally, the

Colonel asked, “Did you find it difficult to blend in while you were in America?”

“No, it was not difficult at all. Unless you break a law, such as while driving

a car, no one bothers you. I could have gone anywhere in the country and no one

would have cared. I carried no papers other than a driver’s license. The Americans

are stupid when it comes to knowing who is who.”

“There are some here who want you to be executed for your disobedience. I

am not so sure that is a good idea. There are certain elements to your story that I

find appealing. Your ingenuity, for instance, in transporting the bomb in a baby

carriage. Now that was clever, very clever.” He paused while Karim thought that

over. Karim sat stoically. He would show this hard-liner no weaknesses. The

Colonel said, “Think about it, Karim al-Hadji. Why should we let you live?”

He did think about it. A long minute crept by as he tried to formulate in his

mind the perfect answer, the one that might save his life. “I have gained much

knowledge about the way Americans are and how they think. This information can
THE HOBBY/McDougal 178

be useful to others who may go to the United States. I can be valuable in the

training of these people. Or, if I am fortunate enough to be assigned to another

mission, I could be even more effective than before. I believe in our cause. Do not

kill me for my momentary lapse in judgment. I really believed that if I returned to

Iran I would be of much more use than if I died in America.”

The Colonel showed a hint of a smile. “You do not really believe I am

buying this dog shit, do you? In fact, Karim al-Hadji, you are a coward, a coward

who has betrayed the trust we placed in you.”

Karim could not contain himself any longer. The lean muscles in his face

hardened as he glared at the Colonel. “Colonel, I did not anticipate a parade in my

honor upon my return, but I did expect better than this. I know that you fought for

Iran in the Iraq war. I know you were promoted after a successful action near the

Shatt al-Arab. You fought in battle after battle. It is obvious that you grew in

experience into a masterful soldier. It is also obvious you did not strap twenty

pounds of explosives to your body and run into the enemy lines, intent upon

becoming a martyr. Would I call you a coward for not doing so? Of course not. You

were brave without being stupid. Well, so am I. If you want to let some lout chop

off my head to prove a point, go ahead. But don’t call me a coward. I fought to live

and fight again. If I were you, I would not throw that away.”

Colonel Mansour al Mohammed looked at Karim to see if could detect

madness. He had interrogated hundreds of men, and some women, and had never

had one react as Karim al-Hadji had. This was an exceedingly clever rascal. His

boldness in turning the tables upon his interrogator showed potential for greatness.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 179

But he could not acknowledge that. He must retain the upper hand, and he would.

But he knew then that he was not going to have this man executed. He raised his

right hand and snapped his fingers. The door to the room opened and a sergeant

entered. He bowed ever so slightly. The Colonel said, “Oshnar, please bring us a

pot of fresh coffee and two cups. And some date sugar and mare’s milk.”

He said to Karim, “I have decided to give you another opportunity to prove

your worth. This time it will not depend upon your dying, but rather, your living.”

Karim tilted his head slightly and nodded. He said, “I hope the coffee is hot.

It’s damned cold in here.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 180

Chapter Twenty-two

When I returned to the hotel, Bitsy was in her room. I called her on the

house phone and asked her down for a late lunch. As we worked on bowls of conch

chowder and a platter of jerked chicken and fried plantain, she let me know that her

trip to the bank had gone off without a hitch. She was also delighted with the

wedding dress she had bought. She was happy as a Caymanian clam. We topped off

lunch with a bottle of champagne.

I told her all about Canterbury Denton. I was sure by now that my ruse had

worked. Bitsy confirmed that she had not seen Black Car after I dropped her off at

the boutique.

One thing I had not covered with Bitsy was how she should act when she

would meet Waldrip and Grant. I said to her, “I don’t see any way to keep you out

of the business. I had been thinking it might be better all around, and safer, if you

did not let on how much you know about what we are up to. That maybe when you

meet Waldrip and Grant, you should probably keep what you know under your hat.

But they’re not going to buy that, not for a minute.”

“Then I shouldn’t tell them I’m just a prisoner of love?”

“No. I might get by with that, but not you.”

After we ate, my bride-to-be went to her room to rest up before the evening

ceremony. Back in my room, I found a large bouquet of roses and a card which

read, “Congratulations! I am sure you will enjoy a ROYAL wedding. You can

BANK on it. Best wishes, your pals, Joe Waldrip and Don Grant.” Gotcha, I
THE HOBBY/McDougal 181

thought. Those guys were too clever by half. I didn’t expect to win every one

against them, but I was hoping it would be the ones that really counted. There was

also a message light blinking on the room phone. It was from Elena, the nuptial

arranger. I called her. She said for an extra hundred bucks she could have the hotel

steel band there to play the wedding march. That sounded like a nice touch, so I

agreed.

I called my daughter Elizabeth to let her know I was getting hitched. She

knew Bitsy and I was relatively sure she would be happy for me.

“Dad, that’s great news. I’m very fond of Bitsy. You made a good choice.

When are you coming our way? Kayla needs to have some Grandpa time.”

“I’ll be in New York on business in a few days. We’ll get together then. I

miss you guys.”

“It’s mutual, Pop. Can’t wait to see the two of you.”

In the final analysis, the wedding ceremony was beautiful. I felt very

fortunate to have broken the unwritten rule that almost handsome men hook up with

almost pretty women. In my case, an almost handsome man had captured a

beautiful wife. Judge Blasingame was a touch inebriated, but what the hell, so were

Bitsy and I. The band was stationed on the beach next to the pier. When we arrived,

they played, “True Love.” They were so good that Bitsy began to tear up. Seeing

her give way to sentimentality made me shed one tear…or maybe two. I was happy

as hell. I guess I’m just an old softie. Of course, if anything had gone wrong, I

would have shot the person responsible. Hey, just kidding.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 182

Our wedding night was a replay of the previous night. The next morning we

rented a couple of mopeds at the hotel and took a trip to the local turtle farm,

mingling with dozens of tourists who were more interested in shooting pictures than

in the lecture on the precarious life and future of turtledom. The German couple

whom we had talked to in the restaurant was there and came over to say hello.

“Turtles. I have not had much interest in them unless they were in my soup.” It

came out ‘zoup.’ “And by the way, congratulations on your marriage. We watched

the ceremony from the hotel. It was quite beautiful, at least the bride was.”

Bitsy said, “Well, thank you very much. But I thought the groom was quite

nice looking as well.”

He said, “It’s all a matter of perspective, madam.”

I smiled and asked where they were heading after they would leave the

Caymans. He said, “We are going to the Virgin Islands. I have arranged for a

sailboat charter there.”

“Have you been there before?”

“Oh, yes. I love sailing and try to get down there every year.” With a sly

look at Bitsy he said, “Even though it is quite dangerous, you know. Caribbean

pirates.”

She grinned, “You are pulling my leg, Herr Goebbels. Pirates indeed.”

He said, in mock seriousness, “On the contrary, Madam. Why, right here in

the Caymans, in the sixteenth century, the fiercest buccaneer of them all made this

his homeport. People are still looking for his treasure on Grand Cayman. Digging
THE HOBBY/McDougal 183

along the beaches is a national pastime. Yes, this was where Captain Red Shirt of

the ship Sharkfin roved.”

I said, “I can’t say that I have ever heard of him. Was he English?”

“No one knows for sure. He preyed upon ships of all flags, including the

English. The story goes that he was very bloodthirsty and also very brave. He was

in the forefront of every battle. His First Mate asked him one day, ‘Why do you

always wear a red shirt in every fight?’ Captain Red Shirt replied that he did not

want the crew to become alarmed if he should suffer a wound. Consequently he

wore a crimson pirate’s blouse that would not betray his bleeding. This satisfied the

mate’s curiosity. Then one day, the bos’n in the crow’s nest shouted that there were

ten British Man O’ War ships approaching, with far more guns than the Sharkfin.

They carried more sail than Red Shirt’s ship. Outrunning them would be

impossible, so he did the only thing he could do.”

Bitsy asked, “And what was that?”

Herr Goebbels said, with a straight face, “He sent the First Mate below with

orders to fetch him his brown pants.”

Bitsy laughed before I did. “That is funny as hell,” she said. “I didn’t know

you Germans had a sense of humor.”

Herr Goebbels grinned, pleased with his success as a raconteur. His wife

said, “Well of course we have a good sense of humor. I married Ludwig, didn’t I?”

He feigned a hurt look, and we laughed. Bitsy said, “Good luck on your

sailing trip. I wish we could go with you, but we are on our way home tomorrow.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 184

Ludwig said, “Of course. You have funerals to attend. Such a tragedy. This

is such a dangerous world.” Then he looked directly at me and said unsmilingly,

“You should be very careful, Herr Travis. Danger is around every corner.”

Helga Goebbels took Bitsy’s hand and said, “Perhaps someday under

happier circumstances we can get together again.”

Bitsy said, “I would like that. Goodbye for now.”

Outside, as we were strapping on our moped helmets, the Goebbels drove

by, in their black car. It was the same one that had followed me the day before.

Bitsy said, “Did you see what I just saw?”

“Damn sure did.”

She said, “And now I know how he had already known your name when we

first met. He was right about one thing for sure. Danger lurks where you might least

expect it, even across from a plate of sauerkraut.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 185

Chapter Twenty-three

The next day we landed safely at the Dallas/Fort Worth Airport. Not

surprisingly, Joe Waldrip met us at the baggage claim area. He approached, a broad

grin on his face. “Well, Judge, congratulations. And what a beautiful bride.” He

offered his hand to Bitsy. “I’m Joe Waldrip, an old friend of the Judge. It’s Bitsy,

right?”

Bitsy gave him her most radiant smile. “Why, yes, Its nice to meet a friend

of Duncan.”

Joe said, “I’ve got the Lincoln in the parking lot. How much luggage have

you got?”

“Four bags and a box full of souvenirs. But you really didn’t need to go to

all this trouble, Joe.”

“Hey, nothing’s too good for an old pal…and his bride.”

Bitsy took that as her cue to go to the restroom. “I need to powder my nose.

Don’t leave without me.”

Joe laughed, “Not a chance.”

When she was out of earshot, he asked, “How much have you told her about

us?”

I answered sternly, “It would be easier to tell you what I haven’t shared with

her. Joe, there’s no way I can lead some sort of a secret agent double life and get the

job done. This is not True Lies and I’m not Arnold Schwarzenegger. She knows

everything you know about me, what I’ve done and what I’m going to do.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 186

He cocked his head slightly and said, “Okay, Judge, if you say so. I hope

you’ve told her to keep her mouth shut.”

He pulled a folded sheet of paper out of his jacket pocket. “I suppose you

heard about the disaster in Houston.” I nodded. I was also wondering why I hadn’t

gotten an argument out of Waldrip. Maybe when the time comes, he thinks he will

do a two-fer.

“We’ve tied Alfred Said directly to the bomber. It didn’t take long to figure

out what happened. The bomber drove up in a van with fake police markings on the

side. External cameras at the Brown Center recorded his arrival and departure. He

was dressed as a cop. He got the bomb in the building concealed in a baby stroller,

with a real live child in it. We don’t know yet where he got the kid. The bomb was

wrapped in a suicide bomber’s vest. We found minute shreds of it. We figure he

was supposed to blow himself up but chickened out. We found the van, abandoned

in a supermarket parking lot. This is a photocopy of one of the items they found in

it.”

He handed me the sheet of paper in his hand. It was a copy of an envelope.

The return address was Banco J. G. de Honduras, N.A. in New York City.

I said, “That son of a bitch. And what about the terrorist? Any leads?”

“By the time we picked up his trail, he was out of the country. Best guess he

is in Tehran.”

Joe looked even worse than the last time I had seen him. He seemed to have

dropped weight and his skin had taken on the grayish pre-death hue I had seen when
THE HOBBY/McDougal 187

Dori was near the end. I said to him, “Joe, you don’t look very well. Are you

okay?”

He turned his hands palm up and shrugged slightly as he replied, “You’ve

got a good eye, Judge. I haven’t been up to speed lately. Nothing serious. I’ll be

alright.”

I wondered what might happen if I outlasted Waldrip. Would they hook me

up with someone who might be a worse threat down the line? I had Joe’s number. I

might not be as lucky with someone new.

Changing the course of the conversation, Joe asked, “Do you plan to take

her with you to New York?”

I said, “Sure. After all, I’m on my honeymoon.”

“I don’t think that’s such a good idea. It could complicate things.”

Probably too abruptly, I said, “That’s my affair. I’ll handle it.”

“Well, I still think…”

I interrupted him. “Butt out on that, Joe.”

“Okay.”

Lightening up, I said, “Thanks for picking us up. We’re going to stay at my

place until we head north.”

“Alright. I’ll drop you off and then I’ll see you in the morning. We’ll go

over the stuff I’ve got ready for you.”

Bitsy came back at the same time our luggage spilled onto the carousel. Joe

smiled at her and said, “Nice powder job on your nose.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 188

Chapter Twenty-four

The interior of the Hezar Tehran Restaurant was finished in rich sandalwood

and red velvet. Gold columns were situated between the tables that ringed the room.

The center of the dining area was devoted to a small stage where Suri, a locally

popular singer was singing the words of a Rodaki poem. Accompanying her was a

traditional four-piece combo, four musicians playing a tanbur, a kamanchen, a ney

and a daf. Colonel Mansour al Mohammed nodded smilingly to the reedy harmony.

The amalgamation of sound they produced was conducive to dreams of Persia

ascendant, of glory about to be regained. Perhaps rising on a fiery cloud above a

devastated Tel Aviv or Washington.

His dinner companions were the somewhat subdued and misguided Karim

al-Hadji, who seemed to have learned the importance of obedience, and Assistant

Minister Salim Jarsan of the Institute for Political and International Studies (IPIS).

Minister Jarsan appeared too young to hold the important post he occupied.

Not yet thirty, he was a rising star in IPIS. His membership in the Iranian

Revolutionary Guard Corp was one of his principal credentials. His personal

ruthlessness was another. His actual duties at IPIS had nothing to do with the stated

mission of the organization. Minister Jarsan was involved in the surreptitious

spreading of absolute terror, horror which would solidify Iran’s role as the rising

star of Islamic fundamentalism. His working hypothesis, the theory extant of his

superiors, was that Iran should use the disparate radical Muslim forces across the
THE HOBBY/McDougal 189

globe to their own ends. When the time came that they would no longer need them,

they would cut them loose.

Jarsan said, “So, Colonel, this is the hero of Houston?”

The Colonel laughed. “More to the point, the pragmatist of Houston.”

Jarsan said, “Pragmatism is good, if it is exercised in the proper mix with

dedication to a cause.” He directed a question to Karim. “Are you dedicated to a

cause?”

Karim answered slowly, “Most assuredly, Minister.”

Jarsan asked, “And what cause would that be, Karim al-Hadji?”

“The cause of a greater Iran. Or if you prefer a pragmatic answer, whatever

cause you want me to embrace.”

Jarsan laughed aloud. “Alright, Karim. We will talk some more about your

dedication, but not tonight. I have ordered Karoshte Ghorme Sabzi for the three of

us. You do like lamb stew, don’t you? Or were your tastes Americanized while you

toiled in the land of the Great Satan? Perhaps a hamburger would be more to your

liking.”

“No, Minister. I have a fondness for lamb. It is a good choice. Perhaps a

lambburger.”

Jarsan laughed again. He said to Colonel Mohammed, “You’re right. He is a

cheeky one.” Then to Karim, he continued, “ Now let us enjoy the evening.

Tomorrow, come to the Institute at ten in the morning. I have something to discuss

with you. For now, let us listen to the delightful Suri.”

“Thank you, Minister. I will be there.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 190

“I’m sure you will.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 191

Chapter Twenty-five

It was good being back in Texas. After Waldrip dropped us off, Bitsy and I

talked long into the night. I had gone over with her the information I had learned

from Waldrip. She said “That son of a bitch! My intuition had already led me to

believe Said might have had something to do with the bombing. Let’s go drop a

hand grenade down his pants.”

I said, “A big one. We’ll give him hell, Bitsy.”

I said, “We’re coming up fast on that big fork in the road that will take us

away from here for a long, long time. Perhaps forever. Why don’t you call Margaret

Beauchamp and see if she and Gordon would like to get together for dinner

tomorrow night. For auld lang syne. “

She sighed. Sure. I’ll call her tomorrow.”

Later, as I lay on my back, holding Bitsy until she fell asleep, my mind

raced fast-forward to Manhattan. It was difficult for me to drift off as I tried to

develop a plan of attack, then modify it and amend it again. I aimed my thoughts at

trying to uncover Said’s vulnerabilities. Everyone has some, although from what I

had gleaned out of the file, he was a man with few points of weakness. Yet I hoped

there would be one chink in his armor where I could slip in a stiletto. Gaining his

confidence, even on a casual, social level would be important. A mini-epiphany

struck me at two in the morning. The plan fell into place like a disassembled watch

puts itself back together again when a film showing it being taken apart by a jeweler

is shown in reverse. It would take some serious walking around money as well as an
THE HOBBY/McDougal 192

assist by someone who speaks Farsi. I figured that if Joe had been able to find a

Kraut couple to fly to the Caymans to keep an eye on me, he certainly ought to be

able to find a Persian accomplice for my operation.

The next morning Bitsy, who owned more clothes than ten average families,

went off to the Galleria for more. “Texas duds just won’t work in Manhattan.” I

agreed, of course.

I had a second cup of coffee while I made notes on a yellow pad. At ten

minutes to ten, Waldrip and Grant were at the door. I let them in and we settled

down in the kitchen. Grant had again brought doughnuts. I put on a fresh pot of

java.

Grant said, “Congratulations, Judge. Joe showed me a picture of your bride.

She is quite a looker. Is she here? I’d like to meet her.”

“Thanks, Don. You’re right. She’s absolutely beautiful. She’s not here now.

She’s shopping. And now she is in your file on me, complete with picture.” I

smiled. “Anything I should know about her?”

“Nope. She was a good choice. You’re going to have a new cover identity.

And because she’s your wife, she will, too.”

I asked, “So what have you got for me, Joe?”

He snapped open his briefcase and pulled out a large folder. “Your cover

name will be George Lampson. Your wife is Edith Lampson. You are a retired oil

broker from Freehold, New Jersey. A set of identity papers for you and Mrs.

Lampson is included in this file as well as a personal profile for each of you. Also

included is an in-depth description of the oil brokerage business. Driver’s license,


THE HOBBY/McDougal 193

passport, DD214 from the army and birth certificate. Same for your wife, except for

the DD214. There are also credit cards and information on your checking account at

the Bank of New York. There’s plenty of dough in the account. Try to make it last.”

Then, somewhat reluctantly, he added, “If you need more, let me know.

“You have an apartment in Manhattan at 755 West 85th Street on the Upper

West Side. Here are two sets of keys. A phone is already installed. It’s a doorman

building. He has been notified of your new lease there. And here are first class

tickets on American Airlines, D/FW to La Guardia. You leave tomorrow evening.

This stuff ought to get you started. Now, is there anything you want that I haven’t

covered?”

“I mentioned before that I thought there might be an opening because of

Said’s interest in sailing. I want you to contact the Hudson View Marina in Jersey

City, where he keeps his boat, and rent dock space in my name for a seventy foot

Swan sailing yacht.”

Grant spoke up. “Holy shit, Duncan, how much does one of those cost?”

I said, “Around two million, but don’t worry. I won’t need it. I simply want

everyone at the marina to believe I own one and that it will be arriving sometime

soon.”

“Well, that’s a relief. If it comes down to it, though, I might be able to get

one or something close to it from our seizure inventory.”

“Good to know, but for now I don’t think that will be necessary. And

finally, I’ll need someone on call who speaks Farsi. They’ll help me set up Said.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 194

Waldrip said, “I know of a guy in our organization who spent some time

over there and he knows the language, at least enough to get by. He might need

some coaching.”

Grant said, “You’re talking about Les, I assume.”

“Yeah.”

“He would be perfect. Coincidentally, he knows the oil business. Set it up

with him. He’s in L.A. Bring him in when Duncan says it’s time. What else, Mr.

Lampson?”

“That’s all for now.”

The three of us stood and we shook hands all around. Grant said, “Good

luck, Judge. We appreciate your cooperation in all of this. I know you feel that you

were mouse trapped, and I suppose you were. But I believe you would have come in

with us even without the stick.”

I smiled as I said, “Probably.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 195

Chapter Twenty-six

The building housing Tehran’s Institute for Political and International

Studies was large and bleak in appearance. It looked as though its designer might

have been a particularly morose Soviet exile. Karim al-Hadji presented himself at

the reception desk at precisely ten in the morning. He had noticed that Minister

Jarsan had been dressed in western style when they had dined at the Hezar Tehran

Restaurant, so he had donned similar attire for this meeting. He was taken by the

receptionist down a labyrinthine stretch of hallways, finally arriving at a door

marked in Arabic, “Section R.”

The guide opened the door and gestured for Karim to enter. As he did so, the

woman left, leaving him in a nearly bare anteroom. The only furnishings were two

chairs and a small table. On the table were two bowls. One held a quantity of

pistachio nuts. The other contained a handful of empty shells. On the wall opposite

the chairs there was another door, unmarked. Karim sat down and waited. As he did

so he reached for a few pistachios, then hesitated. He looked around to see if there

were any cameras. People who took nuts uninvited might fall into disfavor. It might

be wrong to take the nuts without being invited to do so.

He did not take any nuts. In America, he could take all the pistachios he

wanted, crack them and drop the shells on the floor if he wished, and when he grew

tired of waiting, he could open the door and ask why there was such a big damn

delay. But this was not the U.S.A. It was modern Iran and pistachio dissenters could
THE HOBBY/McDougal 196

very well be punished. It was his native land, and now it was a place where he had

to fret about minute details that shouldn’t amount to a hill of camel dung.

He was in danger of losing that boldness which had helped him commit the

perfect offense against the Americans. Being in a police state does have a tendency

to unnerve one. He ran his finger around the inside of his collar, betraying his

nervousness. Then the door opened and Minister Jarsan entered with a smile and

friendly outstretched hand.

“Good morning, Karim al-Hadji. Thank you for coming by.” Karim smiled

inwardly. The Minister knew Goddamned well he had no choice but to obey the

summons.

The Minister was dressed in traditional Arab garb, complete with a kafiya

headdress. Karim felt like a fool with his blue suit, white shirt and tie. The bastard

had thrown him off his guard and he didn’t care for the feeling.

Minister Jarsan said, “Come into my office. I have fresh coffee brewing.”

In the next room, there was no desk, only a long conference table

surrounded by comfortable armchairs. A side table held an American Mr. Coffee

and cups and saucers. Two blue folders were on the table. The cover of each read,

”Operation BHI.” The Minister invited Karim to be seated and then slid one of the

files to him across the table.

“Don’t open it yet. I want to tell you why you are here. You know, you are

lucky to be alive. I know of at least three officials who wanted you shot. Actually,

make that two. The other desired that you be beheaded. He was so angry that he

said he would do it himself. He has done it before. I think he likes it. But I have
THE HOBBY/McDougal 197

interceded on your behalf. I am your sole benefactor. The only one in all of Iran,

outside of your family. Do you understand the importance of that?”

Trying not to appear obsequious, Karim replied, “Yes, Minister Jarsan, I do

indeed. Thank you and may Allah bless you a million times.”

Jarsan said, “I already have Allah in my corner. It is your allegiance, your

unquestioning obedience that I want. I am thinking of sending you on a mission. If

you perform well, you can return to Iran and receive the glory and adulation you

should have gotten on your last homecoming. Does it surprise you that I believe you

performed heroically? It took ingenuity and bravery to pull off the blow to America

that you did.”

Karim sat silently for a moment. Experience had taught him to be wary of

flatterers. Then Karim said, “Yes, I am somewhat taken aback. I hope you will not

think me to be too immodest, but I think your assessment is correct.”

“Do you want redemption?”

“Yes, Minister, very much. I will do anything you ask.”

“I hope you mean that sincerely. I am going to send you back to the United

States to kill more Americans. There is one thing the Americans have done well.

They have financed a very effective national security program, sending monies to

their largest cities to implement the plans of their Homeland Security Department. I

believe that we should show them that by doing so, they are leaving their smaller

cities vulnerable to attack. When we hit them there, it will cause a great uproar

among Middle Americans, who will demand a bigger share of the funds. The end

result will be that they will have to spread the money around more evenly, which
THE HOBBY/McDougal 198

will shortchange those places we would really most like to strike, making them

weaker. If you are successful, Karim, you will have rendered an inestimable service

to Iran, Islam and, of course, to yourself.”

It was easy to see the validity of Jarsan’s plan. And the benefit to Karim was

clear as well. “Quite clever, Minister. I am eager to begin.”

Jarsan asked, “Have you ever seen the American movie, “Cape Fear?”

“No, Minister, I have not seen that one.”

“There were actually two versions. The first, with Gregory Peck and Robert

Mitchum, was by far the best of the pair. The movie had fear as a theme. I bring this

up because there is actually a real Cape Fear, in the American state of North

Carolina. That is where you are going. And fear, in the name of Allah, is what the

infidels will feel when you make your presence known.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 199

Chapter Twenty-seven

The dinner with Gordon and Margaret Beauchamp was particularly poignant

for Bitsy, in that she didn’t know if she would ever return to Dallas and see her

long-time friend again. We joined them at El Fenix Mexican Restaurant. I love Tex-

Mex food and knew it might be a long time before I would taste it again.

Gordon was a successful obstetrician who knew every doctor joke that had

ever been written. I liked him for his good humor and for his obvious fidelity to

Margaret. He was affable and easy to get along with. She, on the other hand, had an

opinion on every subject in the universe and didn’t hesitate to make them known.

She looked like a former cheerleader should, cute. And like the song, ‘her hair hung

down in ringalets.’

Gordon said, “So, why New York? I can think of a dozen more romantic

places to go on a honeymoon. A cruise in the Mediterranean, for instance.”

Margaret interjected, “Or San Francisco. It’s absolutely beautiful there, in

spite of the politics. Or you could go south of the border. Gordon and I took our

wedding trip to Mexico City. So romantic. Of course, we wrote it off on our taxes

since Gordon attended a medical conference while we were there.” She looked at

her husband archly. “You’re so smart, dear.”

Bitsy said, “Duncan’s daughter, Elizabeth, lives in New York. She has a

young daughter and that makes me a grandmother, so we thought we’d get a visit

in, see some shows and then take a trip across Canada by rail.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 200

Margaret said, “Oh, that does sound wonderful I hope you catch Spamalot. I

hear it’s a riot.”

We talked about our trip to the Caymans and Bitsy told the story about

Captain Red Shirt. Gordon laughed uproariously. The waiter cleared the table and I

ordered after-dinner drinks.

Avoiding discussion of the disaster in Houston was impossible and

broaching it caused a somber mood at the table. Gordon said, “I’ve believed all

along that we should be fighting the war on terror, but it always seemed to me to be

somehow removed from me personally. I didn’t know any of the 9/11 victims. But

that’s changed now. I knew a dozen or more of the people killed at the Brown

Center. It seems almost too horrible to contemplate. One was Walter Gaston, a

cardiologist with an office in my building. His wife died, too.” He gestured toward

me. “Duncan, I believe that if given the opportunity, I could kill the person

responsible for the bombing. I haven’t felt that way since I was in ‘Nam. Working

in the 95th Evac hospital at Monkey Mountain near DaNang, I saw so many of our

kids come in with the most horrific wounds, many obviously fatal. Increasingly I

became more and more angry. At first it was the Viet Cong I hated. Later, I realized

it was LBJ and McNamara that really had me pissed. I guess I was just mad because

I wanted to be an OBGyn and there I was, cutting off limbs and stuffing intestines

back into body cavities. The men I saved, or tried to save, over there had a hard

time understanding the mission. So did I. But you know what I’m talking about,

Gordon. You were there.”

Margaret said, “Come on. dear. Lighten up.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 201

I said, “Sure. However, I was too busy trying to avoid being in a situation

that would lead me to meet you or any of your colleagues to worry about the

political aspect of the war. When people ask me now if I had been in the Vietnam

War, I’m not sure whether to tell them I had been in it or whether it had been in me.

In retrospect. it was a damned surreal experience.

Gordon laughed cynically. “I understand. One of the most popular graffiti

signs I saw over there was the one that read ‘Yankee go home.’ I suspect that most

of them were painted on walls by our guys. You and I were lucky. We eventually

did make it back.”

Bitsy asked, “What happens now with Chet Bascomb’s congressional

district?”

Margaret said, “I hear the governor is calling a special election for sixty

days from now. Janet Granbury, his first assistant, is rumored to already be the

frontrunner. If it’s true, I think I’ll help her. I’ve always liked her and she certainly

is politically correct. Of course, Duncan, if you were to throw your hat in the ring,

I’d back you in a minute.”

I said, “Not even a remote chance, Maggie. When I slid off the bench, I

hung up my running shoes forever. Besides, I’m a newlywed. Romancing voters

would almost be adulterous.”

Margaret laughed and said, “Never thought of it that way. Bitsy, you’re not

the jealous type. Why don’t you encourage him to run?”

My wife looked at me as she said, “No way. We have other plans.” She

feigned a yawn and continued, “Some of which are plans for tonight.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 202

I took her hand and said, “Yeah, I’m ready to hit the sack.”

Margaret said, “You two are as randy as a couple of kids. Gordon, what’s

the matter with us? Maybe we need a trip to the Caymans ourselves.”

Gordon shrugged. “Could be, Babe. Could be.”

I said, “This has been a delightful evening. I hope we can do it again soon.

When we get back we’ll call you.”

I felt lousy when I said it. The chance that we would have another evening

like this was pretty slim. As we walked out to the parking lot, Gordon said,

“Duncan, you seem somewhat preoccupied. More than being a newlywed would

cause you to be. Are you okay? Medically, I mean.”

“Never better. You’re very perceptive. Someday I’ll tell you all about it.”

We shook hands as the women hugged their goodbyes. Our life was being changed

in ways we would probably regret, but we didn’t know to what extent. It wouldn’t

have made any difference. We were already past the point of no return.

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 203

Chapter Twenty-eight

I’m sure every self-respecting terrorist on the globe has a map of the United

States in his hip pocket, with a red-circled bulls-eye drawn on New York City. And

why not? It is America’s crucible, where every idea is tested to the max, where the

arts boil and roil and reach their pinnacle, where every race is represented (and

some would say, resented), a city of revered icons. The Statue of Liberty, the

Empire State Building, the Brooklyn Bridge, Yankee Stadium, Broadway, Times

Square, Central Park, the huge, desolate hole in the Battery and the lights, my God,

the lights. One cannot fly over Manhattan at night, as Bitsy and I were doing at that

moment, and not be swept up in the lore and legend that is Gotham.

Bitsy had the window seat. She held tightly to my hand as she looked out

into the night. The illuminated spires upthrust from the teeming streets, all nestled

between the two dark bands of the Hudson and the East Rivers, mesmerized her.

“Oh, Duncan, it’s so wonderful. I wish we could live there forever. I know I’m

going to love every minute we’re here.”

I didn’t answer. Even though I felt much the same way, I knew that like any

good soldier, we would live where the brass assigned us to be. At least until we

resigned our commissions.

In the cab heading in from La Guardia, the city became more real, but no

less beautiful. Bitsy said, “I feel like Dorothy, running toward the Emerald City. It’s

all just too grand. And I’m so happy and excited that we’re here together, Duncan.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 204

My arm was around her shoulder, and I pulled her close. “I feel the same

way, but I can’t stop thinking about the reason why we’re here. I promise, though,

that despite the circumstances, we’ll find time to enjoy our stay.”

“I know that, Duncan. I have no illusions. Unless it’s expecting too much

from the apartment Joe has gotten for us. I can’t help but think his taste is not going

to be in the same ballpark as mine, or yours.”

I smiled at that. That had not been one of my worries, but now that Bitsy

had raised the issue, I was willing to bet she was right. Probably early Godfather

with a bit of red, flocked wallpaper and lots of leather furniture. If that proved to be

the case, I would turn Bitsy loose in Manhattan’s interior design shops post haste.

My plans might include entertaining. I didn’t want to appear any more gauche than

I already was.

When the cabby dropped us off in front of the building, I was pleasantly

surprised. An attractive structure with not a hint of post war modernism. It was ten

stories of granite and ivy with intricately carved corbels flanking each window. The

doorman, however, was nowhere in evidence. It was close to ten so I assumed he

was gone for the night. I would let him know tomorrow that we were in residence.

Our new abode was number 6-A. We carried our luggage to the elevator and

took it to the sixth floor. The lift was the old fashioned kind with an inner brass

expanding accordion door. As it moved slowly upwards we could see the walls of

the shaft. A faint musty odor emanated from the bottom of the square tube,

reminiscent of ancient grease and sixty year old dust.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 205

The apartment key required a bit of jiggling, but finally clicked the lock

open. I found a light switch to the right of the entrance and snapped it on. The entry

hall led to a large parlor. It was elegantly furnished in shades of white and tan.

Saffron drapes covered the windows. A carved stone fireplace dominated one wall.

To the right was a dining area and off that a modern kitchen. It was a two-bedroom

flat, both decorated in a fashion similar to the parlor. There were touches of elegant

art nouveau in every room. The bathroom was finished in piranshahr green granite,

which ironically is imported from Iran. Emerald towels and washcloths were

hanging from polished brass fixtures. The bathtub was carved from jade-toned

marble. The floor was tiled in the same stone.

As we stood in the middle of the living room, Bitsy said, “Well, shame on

me for doubting Joe Waldrip’s taste. This place is absolutely stunning. I won’t

change a thing.”

I said, “That’s one great relief, my dear. I want this trip to be as enjoyable

for you as can be. There’ll be enough to contend with without having a lousy place

to live.”

“Well, you can quit worrying about that. I love it.”

“Good. Right now I’m going to set up my laptop and check my e-mail. I’ll

let Joe know how impressed we are with his elegantly sophisticated taste.”

“I wouldn’t go that far. I think he probably got lucky. Maybe this was all

that was available.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 206

Before I could turn on the laptop, the phone on the bedside table rang. I

answered it. It was Waldrip. His voice sounded strained and weaker than when I

last talked to him. “Hey, Judge, how do you like your new digs?”

“Pretty damned nice, Joe. I didn’t know you had such good taste.”

“I don’t. It was the only thing in that neighborhood that was available. I’m

glad you like it. Don’t ask how much it is.”

“I won’t.”

“I got your membership in the yacht club. For you and the better half both.

When I signed you up, I asked about Alfred Said. I know that wasn’t subtle, but

sometimes direct beats cunning. Anyway, I didn’t say how I knew him or anything

and the guy didn’t ask. He said that Said has dinner there every Saturday, like

clockwork. And I also lined up the Farsi speaker, Les Bladen. He’ll be in New York

in two days. He’ll call you when he gets there. Anything else you need right now?”

I was really pissed that Joe had asked about Said, but I held my tongue. “No,

that should do it.”

“Okay. I’ve been a little under the weather. I’m going into Methodist

Hospital here in Dallas for an oil change and a thousand mile checkup. Call me

there if you need me.”

That didn’t sound very good, in spite of Joe’s half-hearted attempt at humor.

“Okay. Take care of yourself, Joe”

“Sure thing, Judge.” He hung up.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 207

I said to Bitsy, “Joe may have compromised us. When he acquired our

membership at Hudson View, he inquired about Alfred Said. He doesn’t think he

made an error. I sure as hell hope not.”

Frowning, she said, “I don’t like that. No, not a bit of it. I wonder what else

he’s done that might hurt us.”

“Quien sabe?”

“Yeah, who knows?”

“He also said he’s going into the hospital for tests.”

She nodded her head as she said, “The first time I saw him I knew he was

dying. He has the same gray look that my dad had when he was about to die.”

“You may be right. If he does, it’s going to change the dynamics of all this

somewhat. We’ll see what happens.”

“Yes, we’ll see.”

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 208

Chapter Twenty-nine

Bald Head Island is not New York City. It is about as un-New York as it can

be. A beautiful small isle with fourteen miles of delightful beaches, it’s a

developer’s dream.

It’s located in North Carolina at the confluence of the Cape Fear River and

the Atlantic Ocean. It’s accessible only by ferry or private boat. Bald Head

Lighthouse, also known as Old Baldy or the Cape Fear Light, is the most prominent

feature on the landscape. The original structure was built in 1794. The Frying Pan

Shoals, a collection of shifting sandbars covered by a thin layer of water, extend

twenty-eight miles from the southeast end of the island. Early sailors dubbed the

area Cape Fear for good reason. More than a few mariners lost their ships and their

lives on the shoals.

Half the island is a nature preserve, including a picturesque maritime forest,

primarily oak trees but including wild olive, yaupon and American holly. Deer,

squirrels, raccoons and gray foxes abound.

The island has a year round population of a couple of hundred souls. In the

summer time, that number often swells to a couple thousand, attracted by the

reasonable resort rates and the absolute loveliness of the place. This year, ‘The First

Annual Bald Head Island Fish Fry Festival’ was expected to draw close to five

thousand people on Thanksgiving weekend. The celebration was the brainchild of

Johnson Gounod, a local developer, and in truth he was the only one expecting five

thousand people to show up. Many of the islanders hoped no one would come. They
THE HOBBY/McDougal 209

liked the laid back, remote-from-the-rest-of-the-world lifestyle they had paid for

when they had purchased property there. Gounod, on the other hand, saw that

attitude as counter productive to his ambition to make a lot of money. He had been

working for over ten months to promote the festival, which would probably make or

break him as a businessman. He had been struggling, mostly unsuccessfully, with

the land developers’ art of modern alchemy, turning dirt into gold.

He was actually an interloper of sorts and was not accepted into the coterie

of other Bald Head realtors. The principal developers of the Island had done quite

well in attracting buyers. Gounod had not, mainly because he was slightly…well,

stupid. When his mother had died two years before, he had taken the proceeds of

her bequest and invested in thirty parcels of land and a three-unit condo building on

the island. He would have been better off putting his money in a CD at 1%. The

fault lay not in his offerings, but in his offering. He could not be considered the

world’s worst salesman, only because no contest exists which would certify him as

such.

Gounod hoped that this latest scheme, staging a holiday event, would prove

to be the turning point in making Bald Head the ‘in’ place to be. Actually, though

he didn’t realize it, it already was. It was his thirty subdivision lots that were not

‘in.’ No ocean views, but lots of bog views. Mosquitoes and no-seeums loved his

lots above all others on the island. He thought that if enough people could just see

the place, they would be as enraptured as he was. He had believed one of the

problems he faced was the inaccessibility by automobile of the island. He figured

that in a mobile society, leaving your car on the mainland and riding a ferryboat to
THE HOBBY/McDougal 210

your hometown was a real bump in the road. He had just wasted a year of his spare

time trying to convince his congressman to earmark funds for a bridge over the

Cape Fear River from the mainland to Bald Head. After all, he had complained,

they did it in Alaska, building a ‘bridge to nowhere.’ Representative Bobby Slidelle

was thought by some to be only two steps up from being an idiot, but even he was

too smart to try to slip that one into the budget. The permanent residents of the

place took a very dim view of the proposed bridge project. It is a village ordinance

that no internal combustion vehicles be allowed on the island other than those used

by the police and fire departments. Transportation is primarily by golf cart. Gounod

had plowed ahead, expressing his belief that when a bridge would be built the

islanders would change their minds and allow cars. This was not good thinking. The

locals' unhappiness with Gounod’s proposal eventually translated to discontent with

Johnson Gounod himself. He was not a popular figure.

Today Gounod was working on signing a contract with ‘The Catalytic

Converters Zoom Band’ to appear in concert at his festival. They wanted three

thousand dollars to play. He was willing to spring for five hundred. They settled on

fifteen hundred and a free night in one of his condos. They agreed to play from two

until ten p.m., with fifteen minute breaks every hour. His other big expense had

been to rent battery-powered tram cars to haul people from the ferry slip to the

festival site, with a built-in detour that would take them past his lots. His desire to

achieve big shot status on the island had overridden any small bit of business sense

he may have been able to summon to the project. Too bad Gounod had never heard

of Robert burns. It might have saved him from his own foolishness. Burns advice to
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us all: “Oh wad some power the giftie gie us, to see oursel’s as others see us! It wad

frae monie a blunder free us, and foolish notion.”

Meanwhile, at the Bald Head Island Marina, David Martin, a/k/a Karim al-

Hadji was guiding his forty-three foot Carver motor cruiser into dock space number

twelve. He was single-handing the boat and had prepared for docking while still

outside the marina. This meant that fore and aft lines had been draped over the side

so that the marina dockhands could grab them and secure them to the dock cleats.

White rubber fenders swung loosely on the starboard side, where the dock would

be. As he drifted toward the allotted spot he reversed the twin Cummins diesels and

brought the forward movement to a halt. The boat nestled perfectly alongside the

dock.

After the Carver was secured to the wooden floating pier, Karim cut the

engines and shouted thanks to the helpers. He stepped off the stern onto the

weathered planks and hooked up the boat’s yellow power cable to a dockside shore

power junction box.

Before reboarding, Karim went to the marina office and checked in.

The attendant asked, “How long do you plan to be with us, Mr. Martin?’

“I’m not sure. Maybe a couple of months. Could be longer. I’m thinking

about starting a new business over in Southport. I’ll give you a check for a month in

advance.”

“That will be fine. And what is the name of your boat?”

“It’s ‘Cash Float’.”

“That’s funny. You a banker or something?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 212

Karim smiled enigmatically. “Yes, something. By the way, is the electricity

metered?”

“Yeah. I’ll have one of my guys read the meter in a little while. Let us know

if you need anything.”

Karim said, “Do you have a calendar of events for the next couple of

months?”

“Sure do. Take this one. It’s free.”

“Thank you. I will let you know if there is anything else.”

Back on board, Karim sat at the navigation station desk. He had an open

copy of a book, Nelson Demille’s “Up Country,” laid out. He spent a half-hour

flipping the pages back and forth, writing a series of numbers separated by commas.

He was preparing a classic book-code message, each number designating a page or

a letter on that page. Virtually unbreakable unless you know the book being used

and you have an identical copy. With millions of books in print, the chance of

someone else deciphering was slim to none. After completing the communication,

he accessed bancodehondurasjg.com and clicked on ‘Contact us’. He copied the

entire text into the comment section in the e-mail and sent it.

This communiqué was to the point. “On the island. Will establish storage

facilities in Southport, a nearby village. It seems that Thanksgiving Day is going to

be a good time to attack. There will be a celebration on the beach and many people

are expected. Plan developing. More soon.”

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 213

Chapter Thirty

Alfred Said opened his e-mail and smiled. Another jumble of numbers from

Mr. Martin. He picked up his phone and dialed the main number for the Iranian

mission to the United Nations. When the male operator answered, Alfred said in

Farsi, “Seyed Mahmood, please.”

“One moment.”

A click and two buzzes. “This is Mahmood.”

“This is al-Said. I feel that I should praise Allah at noon on Friday at Masjid

Al-Fatih.”

Seyed Mahmood said, “Praise be to Allah, that he speaks to your heart.”

He disconnected and jotted down the date and time he had just heard.

Alfred Said closed the door to his office and took a copy of Up Country

from his book shelf. He knew he was not supposed to be privy to the information

that passed through his office to Mahmood, but he always took the time to decipher

it anyway. Later, he tore up the transcription after placing the sheet of coded

numbers in a file marked All-Sports Distribution.

That evening, Alfred sat down to dinner with his wife, Ghodsi. He noticed

that she had put on a bit of weight lately. She was looking more and more like his

mother, an unsettling thought. She was complaining about a colleague at N.Y.U.

“He’s a typical, overbearing Jew. He forever pushes the Israeli economic model as

the epitome of what an economy should be. He is unwilling to acknowledge that

much of its success has been built upon the blood, sweat and tears of the Palestinian
THE HOBBY/McDougal 214

people. He’s such an arrogant bastard, as if Jews were the master race. Those who

see Israel as the new Third Reich are not far off the mark. I really hate the sons of

bitches.”

Alfred took these rants of Ghodsi with a few grains of salt. In last year’s

contest for department head, Aaron Goldman had beaten Ghodsi. It had pissed off

Alfred a bit, too. The group making the recommendation was laced liberally with

Jews, who as he and everyone else knows, look out for their own even when there is

no exceptional merit found in their candidate. Were it not for the prospect of

eventually annihilating the Zionists Alfred would have been tempted to quit the

intrigue that was such a huge part of his life. After all, he was an American

millionaire. He could really do whatever he wished. But the prospect of spilling

Jewish blood overrode all other aspects of his life. In truth, his extreme dislike of all

things Jewish was his life altering obsession. And of course the knowledge that he

would probably be killed if he tried to leave the network had some significance in

keeping him a devoted American mujahideen. And then there was the money. He

had become a wealthy mujahideen, which beat being a poor one all to hell.

He was proud of his wife, but was afraid that her increasingly open

radicalism might invite some to take a closer look at their lives than he wished.

Alfred said, “I have the same abhorrence for the Zionist bastards that you

do, but I must ask you, Ghodsi, to please tone down your public rhetoric. It might

bring attention to the bank, and that could prove to be embarrassing.”

She said petulantly, “Well, that’s just too bad. What I do is my business, not

the bank’s. Besides, you should be proud of what I’m doing. It seems to be more
THE HOBBY/McDougal 215

than you and your friends are willing to do. You never take a public position on

anything, even when it would be easy to do.”

“I ask only that you work more from the background and not squarely atop

the barricade waving a crescent flag. Couldn’t you do this for me?”

She was clearly miffed. She sat sullenly for a moment before saying, “I will

think about it. My commitment is no small thing, to be tossed lightly aside. And

don’t forget how you came to be the president of the bank.”

He knew he should shut up and quit while he was ahead, but he couldn’t

resist one more jibe. “As for your ‘commitment’, when was the last time you set

foot in a mosque?’

Her voice rose. “This is about justice, not your damned patriarchy. If you

want me to act the obedient Muslim wife, then treat with respect me and the things

that I believe are important. People depend on me. I have some degree of

significance in certain quarters.”

“I know, and thank you for your consideration. I do respect you. But think

about the big picture, if you will. The work I do at the bank is incredibly important

to the cause.”

Tartly, she said, “You’re welcome. Perhaps at the next ‘Support For Israel’

parade I will appear with a smaller pro-Palestinian sign.”

“That would be nice, my dear. Please pass the bread.”

She said, “You’re a silly man. Of course I know exactly what the bank’s

business is and what you do all day down on Broad Street. And as long as I

continue to make regular remittances to my brother who, as you must recall, made
THE HOBBY/McDougal 216

your appointment possible, things will continue to go our way. One thing the

Americans do have right is a sense of family values. And so do we, Alfred.”

The following Friday Alfred journeyed to Brooklyn. Like most

Manhattanites, he did not relish visiting other boroughs. Knowing that a limo might

make him conspicuous, he rode the ‘L’ train to Bedford Avenue. The subway car

was filled to capacity and he had to stand, swaying in unison with other riders, a

clackety-clack ballet. His expensive black cashmere overcoat set him apart from his

fellow travelers, most of whom wore jeans and logoed jackets. As the train picked

up speed, he watched the tunnel lights begin to flash by rapidly, becoming an

incandescent dotted line outside the car. His thoughts strayed, as they had so

frequently of late, to the fortune he had accumulated and what he might do with it.

He was jostled out of his reverie by a young ochre-skinned, freckled black man who

was importuning every one in the car. He was an entrepreneur, a seller of dry cell

batteries.

The black man pushed his wares in Alfred’s face. “I got ‘em all. Double

AA, triple AAA, C, whatever you need. How many you want, mister?”

“Get away. I don’t need any batteries.”

The young man fixed his piercing, oddly blue eyes on Alfred. “Sure. Thanks

for nothing.” He made his way through the car, stopping at the rear door.

Said thought, those people, they are everywhere. They are as bad as Jews,

pushing and grasping.

Alfred exited the train at the Bedford station and trudged up the two long

flights of concrete steps. He glanced at his Rolex. It was 11:30. He quickened his
THE HOBBY/McDougal 217

pace as he walked briskly down Bedford toward Greenpoint. Intent upon his

mission, he didn’t notice the black battery salesman trailing a half block behind.

The Al-Fatih Mosque was located in a busy section of Manhattan Avenue. It

was housed in a modest four-story apartment building. The bottom floor was a

storefront where the worshippers gathered. The upper three stories were occupied

by the Imam’s quarters and a madrasa, where Moslem fundamentalism is taught.

The school is closed to outsiders. Alfred was aware that this seminary served as a

training ground for militants. After all, it was supported financially by Banco J. G.

de Honduras, N.A. The Imam, Samiul Al-Badr, was recently interviewed by a

reporter from the New York Times. He told the scribe, "We only impart religious

education here. We preach non-violence. If the students later take up guns, it is not

because of what we have taught. It is their reaction to the injustices visited upon

Moslems in Iraq and Palestine by America.”

As Said approached the mosque, he could hear the muezzin sounding the

adhan, the call to prayer, from the mosque's third story window. If one closed his

eyes, he would think he was in Ankara or Tehran or Baghdad. Well, maybe not

Baghdad. The muezzin’s sing-songy chant was not accompanied by a car bomb

percussion section.

Alfred pulled a crocheted skullcap from his pocket and stepped inside the

mosque. He knelt and untied his $1,500 A. Testoni shoes, slipped them off and set

them aside by the door. He moved across to the main hall of worship. A painted line

ran cater-corner across the room, so that worshippers might know the proper

direction of the qibla, the compass bearing toward Mecca. He was happy to see that
THE HOBBY/McDougal 218

the Imam had spent some of the bank’s money on new imported Iranian prayer

rugs.

Seyed Mahmood was already kneeling upon a prayer rug on the far right of

the back row. Alfred went to the mat directly in front of him and knelt down. Imam

Samiul Al-Badr entered with a dramatic flourish and began speaking. After the

usual calls for Allah’s blessing, he got into the meat of his sermon.

“Allah has blessed this mosque with loyal Muslims who believe in the

mission of the madrasa. Without their support, we would perish as the desert flower

under a hot, parching sun.” He smiled at Alfred as he said this.

"We are convinced of the ultimate victory of Allah; we believe that one of

these days, we will enter Jerusalem as conquerors, enter Jaffa as conquerors, enter

Haifa as conquerors and all of Palestine as conquerors, as Allah has decreed.

"Anyone who does not attain martyrdom in these days should wake in the

middle of the night and say: 'My God, why have you deprived me of martyrdom for

your sake? For the martyr lives next to Allah.

“Our enemies suffer now more than we do. Why? Because we are convinced

that our dead go to Paradise, while the dead of the Jews and the crusaders go to

Hell, to a cruel fate. So we stand firm and steadfast, in obedience to Allah.

"The Jews await the false Jewish messiah, while we await, with Allah's help,

the Mahdi, peace be upon him. His pure hands will murder the false Jewish

messiah. Where? In the city of Lod, in Palestine. Palestine will be, as it was in the

past, a graveyard for the invaders, just as it was a graveyard for the Tatars and to the

Crusader invaders, and for the invaders of the old and new colonialism.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 219

"A reliable tradition says: 'The Jews will fight you, but you will be set to

rule over them. Who will set the Muslim to rule over the Jew? Allah. And what is

Allah’s will? To kill the Jews, all Jews. The Muslim nation will spread throughout

the world.

"Oh Allah, accept our martyrs in the highest heavens. Oh Allah, raise the

flag of Jihad across the land. If any among you would desire to travel to the land of

our ancestors, to fight the crusaders, this mosque will find the resources to get you

there." Another smile in Alfred’s direction.

"Oh Allah, forgive our sins.”

After the homily, Imam Al-Badr stepped off the low platform and made his

way to Alfred and Seyed. “I am honored that you would travel so far to attend our

service.”

Seyed said, “Other Imams give us only salt. Occasionally, we like a bit of

the pepper which you dispense.”

Alfred smiled, “You are doing good work here in the Brooklyn vineyard,

Imam. I will continue to do what I can to assist you in my humble way.”

“You have been of immense help, honorable Said, for which we are most

grateful.”

Seyed Mahmood said, “Keep up the good work. And now, I must return to

my duties.”

They shook the Imam’s hand and made their way to the door, where each

knelt and put on their shoes. Outside, Seyed said, “Nice shoes, Alfred. Your

banking business must be better than my government business.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 220

Said didn’t respond directly, but instead pulled an envelope from his coat

pocket and handed it to Seyed Mahmood. “Some numbers from a friend.”

“Thank you. I will take care of them. And by the way, I hope the FBI hasn’t

wired this mosque. They would have gotten an earful today.”

Alfred laughed. “This is America, Seyed. We have freedom of speech and

the separation of mosque and state. Hooray for the red, white and blue.”

An SUV with diplomatic plates pulled up to the curb. Seyed said, “May I

offer you a ride back to Manhattan?”

As the car with the two men in the rear seat entered traffic, the battery

salesman across the street put his Nikon camera in his pocket and headed back

toward the subway entrance.

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 221

Chapter Thirty-one

The same evening we heard from Waldrip, I called my daughter, Elizabeth,

at her home in Brooklyn. She’s a freelance writer, primarily writing copy for

websites. She’s quite good at it and is much in demand. Her life is another proof

that things often don’t work out the way we think they will. From an early age she

had wanted to be an artist. To that end, she auditioned to attend the Arts Magnet

High School in Dallas, and was accepted. Later, she earned a Bachelor of Fine Arts

degree from North Texas State University. As difficult as it is to believe, it also

proves that a kid can be smarter than her father.

The following year, she was accepted at the San Francisco Art Institute as a

graduate student. After one week of classes we received the devastating news about

her mother’s cancer. Without hesitation, she left her studies and came home to help

her mom through the horrendous ordeal. Seven months later, Dori, her mother, my

wife, died. I love my daughter very much, but never more so than that time when

she selflessly devoted her life to caring for her mother. Without getting maudlin

about it, I will just say that she is one hell of a kid.

If I had held a contest for a son-in-law, Gerald Corrigan would have won.

His career path is similar to Elizabeth’s. He has a Master of Fine Arts degree, but

long ago eschewed art as a vocation. He is in business for himself as a custom

furniture manufacturer. Because he is an artist, the furnishings he produces are

gloriously original and I must say, beautiful. I kid him by saying I would be a

customer if I could afford it.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 222

When Beth answered the phone, I said, “This is Kayla’s Grandpa. Bitsy and

I are here in the center of the universe and would like to come by and spoil the kid

for a few hours.”

“Pop, that’s wonderful. Only why don’t Gerald and I spoil you two instead.

Where are you staying?”

“I’ll get into that when we see you. How about tomorrow night?”

“Great. Come by about seven.”

I called the Hudson View Marina the next day and asked for the dock

manager. Herman Greeley came on the line. I said, “This is George Lampson.”

When he spoke he sounded eagerly solicitous. I figured his salary was partly

commission. “I’m glad you called. We got your application and initiation fee.

You’re on the fast track for membership. The board meets next week, but getting

you approved is just a formality. Now, what can I do for you today?”

“Will I need reservations for your restaurant for Saturday evening?”

“That would be for this Saturday?”

“Yes.”

“I’ll take care of it. How many?”

“Just three.”

“Do you know how to get here?”

“I’m not sure. What’s the best way?”

“If you are not driving, the Jersey Waterways cutter has a landing next to the

marina. Or if you prefer, there is a Path Subway station just a block away.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 223

“Thanks. We’ll be there about eight.” I hung up the phone and filled Bitsy in

on the latest marina news, as well as the invitation from Elizabeth.

“The guy at the marina didn’t say a word about Alfred Said. Maybe we

lucked out on that one.”

“I hope so. So what’s the drill for Saturday night?”

“As soon as I can get in touch with Les Bladen, I’m going to let him know

that I want him with us. He’ll be posing as a former supplier of mine when I was in

the oil importing business.”

“Well, until we hear from him, why don’t we get out and do some of New

York. There’s so much to see and do, I don’t know where to start.”

“How about at F.A.O. Schwarz on Fifth Avenue. I’ve heard it’s the greatest

toy store in the world. Let’s go by and let them prove it.”

“A terrific idea. And I believe it's very close to another toy store dedicated

to women of a certain age, Bergdorf Goodman.”

We had a great time being briefly carefree as we shopped and did touristy

stuff. I bought a new winter coat for Bitsy and a musical treasure box for Kayla. In

mid afternoon we walked into Central Park through the Grand Army Plaza, trailing

a gaggle of teen gigglers swishy skirting through the park. The centerpiece in the

plaza is a gilded equestrian statue of General William Tecumseh Sherman. He is

being led by a dramatically gilded woman whom, I supposed aloud, represented

victory. Bitsy said, “Well for sure, she isn’t representing the women of Atlanta. I’m

glad he was a Yankee. I wouldn’t have wanted the South to be associated for all

time with someone like him. I read his memoirs in college. I was surprised to learn
THE HOBBY/McDougal 224

that after The War Between The States, he led the Army of the West. He said his

proudest achievement in life was, as he put it, ‘to rid the plains of the worthless

Indian’.”

I was born a long time after the Civil War. However, my Texan

grandmother carried a grudge about the outcome of that strife until the day she died,

based on tales told her by her parents. In retrospect, I believe she did that more for

the dramatic effect. It was fun for her to succumb to the vapors when she got too

exercised telling anyone who would listen how the Yankees stole her granddaddy’s

horses. When Grandma wasn’t around, my mother always said that the Yankees

were merely stealing them back.

We strolled towards the pond that covers a large part of the southern portion

of the park and found a bench on the water’s edge. The trees were turning color,

their upside down, rippling reflections in the water enough to inspire even the most

inartistic to want to pick up a brush.

Bitsy said, “It’s so delightful here, as if someone makes sure every day that

Mother Nature is on her best behavior. And just a few hundred feet from a bustling

city.”

“Which do you prefer? This spot or the beach on Grand Cayman.”

She laughed. “Neither. I liked the hotel room at the Grand Carib the best.”

I put my arm around her and sat quietly, taking in our surroundings with an

appreciation I had rarely felt before. A homeless man in a raggedy army coat and a

scruffy black toboggan hat shuffled by us. He had passed us a few feet, when he did
THE HOBBY/McDougal 225

an about face and meandered over to our bench. He sat down next to me. I ignored

him until he said, “Hello, Judge. How’s it going?”

Startled, I turned and looked at him. It was my old friend, ochre-face. His

cobalt blue eyes were squinted as he smiled broadly. “Gotcha.”

I said, “Well, I’ll be damned. Gotcha indeed. You sure get around, fella.”

“Yes, I do. We haven’t been formally introduced. I’m Able Kane. Don’t

laugh. I’ve heard all the jokes a hundred times. I know who you both are. Glad to

meet you as well, Mrs. Travis.”

Frowning, she answered semi-politely, “Likewise, I believe.”

I said, trying not to sound too sarcastic, “So what brings you to New York,

Able? Going to take in a few shows?”

“I might, if time allows. The truth is, you and I are colleagues in the war.”

“I already had that figured. What is it specifically that you are up to?”

“I’m here to help you. You may have guessed that Joe Waldrip is going to

be out of pocket for a while. The truth of the matter is that he is a goner. Stage four

lung cancer. He has brought me up to speed on your situation. So, bottom line, I’m

your new Joe.”

I said, “I’m sorry to hear that about Joe.” I was really unhappy about the

news, but Joe’s welfare was the least reason for it. I knew a lot about Waldrip and

what he might be up to later. I didn’t know squat about my new, blue-eyed handler.

I didn’t like the disadvantage this put me in.

Kane said, “I have some new information that you need to know.” He pulled

an envelope from his coat and extracted several photographs. He flipped through
THE HOBBY/McDougal 226

them to get to the best one. It was a snapshot of two men, one of whom I recognized

from other photos I had seen of Alfred Said. Kane said, “You probably recognize

Said as one of the men in the photo. The other one is Seyed Mahmood, who is

attached to the Iranian Mission to the United Nations. We believe he’s actually a

high-ranking official in Iran’s Ministry of Intelligence and Security. They’re Iran’s

domestic head-choppers who serve as the Ayatollah’s thought police. They’re also

Iran’s very nasty version of our CIA. This picture was taken outside the Al-Fatih

Mosque in Brooklyn. I’m not sure why they went to Brooklyn to meet rather than

some place more convenient in Manhattan, but they did. Anyway, Alfred Said

passed an envelope to Mahmood. I believe it contained something pretty hot. They,

and the rest of the civilized world, are aware that the National Security Agency is

probably reading their mail. Thus the face to face at the mosque.”

“So how does this affect my job?”

“It adds another facet to the intrigue. Don thinks if you get next to Said, you

should be aware of the Mahmood connection. He might let something slip. That’s

all.”

I had always intended to pay close attention to whatever came up when Said

and I would meet. I didn’t need my partners to caution me to do so. However, if

they thought I was a little slow on the uptake, that might work to my advantage.

Kane asked, “Now, is there anything you need from me?”

I was a bit tired of feeling like I was being manipulated. “Actually, there is.

Just who in the hell are you, Able Kane? I mean, how are you connected with the

organization?”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 227

He paused, then said, “You really don’t need to know that, Judge. Suffice it

to say, I’m just a soldier like you. What you really should realize is that I’m your

friend and guide. We, you and I, will be walking through a minefield. Maybe not

forever, but for a while, for sure. I know where most of them are buried, and if you

let me, I’ll keep you out of trouble. If I succeed, then we both stay out of harm’s

way.”

“And that harm would come from…?”

He grinned. “Why, the bad guys, of course.”

“That’s not terribly reassuring, Kane. I have found that sometimes it is hard

to tell the bad guys from the good ones.”

He didn’t respond to that bit of wisdom, but he knew what I meant. He

pulled a small pad and a pen from his pocket. He wrote a number down and handed

it to me. “Here’s where you can call me if you need to talk. Please keep me up-to-

date.”

I said, “Sure,” and wanted to add, and please don’t kill me someday.

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 228

Chapter Thirty-two

My granddaughter, Kayla, had just turned six. She reminded me very much

of her mother at that age, especially because of her precociousness. She hugged

Bitsy and said, “I am so lucky to have had three grandmothers.” I smiled at

Elizabeth. She grinned back, proud that her daughter hadn’t muffed her line.

We had homemade Texas chili, a real treat for Bitsy and me. After dinner,

Kayla and Bitsy went into the den to watch a DVD of “The Wizard of Oz.” I stayed

at the dinner table with Elizabeth and Gerald. I found it to be almost eerie that she

resembled her mom so much. A complexion with an exotic hint of Bedouin.

I would soon be absent from their lives for a long time, perhaps forever. I

couldn’t let the evening pass without letting them know. I decided to tell them most

of my story.

“Elizabeth…Gerald, there’s something I’ve got to tell you.” I didn’t like the

way that came out. This was not an old movie, but real life. They looked at me with

a quizzical air.

Elizabeth said, “So serious, Pop. Bitsy isn’t pregnant, is she?”

When I laughed, it was hollow. “No, but every bit as dramatic I guess.”

I went on. “When your mother died, Beth, I was in a real funk. I was mad at

life, angry because of the cards I had been dealt. I took out that resentment in a way

that most people would classify as over the top, in the extreme.”

I didn’t leave much out. By the time Kayla clapped her hands in the next

room over the melting of the Wicked Witch of the West, I was through. My
THE HOBBY/McDougal 229

daughter and son-in-law sat open-mouthed. Finally, Gerald said, “I don’t know…I

mean, I guess the world is a hell of a lot better off because of what you’ve done,

Duncan. You make a strong case. Like you said, I guess it’s a lot like being a

soldier all over again. I don’t know what else to say.” I believe what he wasn’t

saying was that now I scared the hell out of him. If confession is good for the soul,

it’s also damned hard on your relatives.

Elizabeth began to cry. “Oh, Pop, isn’t there any way out of this mess? I

love you so much, it just kills me that we might never see you again.”

It finally piled up on me. I had made my choice and now it tasted like bitter

acid.

I said, “I don’t know how it will all wind up. I hope it might have a happy

ending. And if it does, there is a way for me to let you know. Beth, get a pad and

pen and write this down. Tomorrow, I want you to get a new cell phone. Call me

tomorrow and leave a message on my machine. The message must be a string of

forty numerical digits. Beginning with the eighth numeral, put in your new number

in reverse. Don’t say anything else.

“When Bitsy and I settle somewhere, I will call that cell and leave a string

of numbers. The four numerals beginning with the tenth one will be a latitude

designation. Then skip eight numbers and beginning with ninth one after that, the

next four will be the longitude. The last numbers, in reverse from the ending one,

will be our phone number wherever we are. That is where you will find us.”

We sat silently for a long time. Bitsy and Kayla came in, looking for ice

cream. Bitsy could tell at once that I had let our secret out. She sat next to Elizabeth
THE HOBBY/McDougal 230

and put her arm around her. More sobbing. Kayla asked curiously, “Mama, what’s

the matter?”

Shaking her head, Elizabeth said to her daughter, “I’m sad because your

Grandpa and Bitsy are going to be going away for a long time. I will miss them”

Kayla said, “Oh, Grandpa, please don’t go.”

I was too choked up to be able to answer.

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 231

Chapter Thirty-three

Karim al-Hadji sat across from Josephine Garwood, the owner of Garwood

Realty in Southport, North Carolina. She was a stunning forty-five year old woman,

near the crest of the hill of life, but not quite over it. Her shoulder length blond hair

framed a face that reminded him of the American movie star, Sharon Stone. Karim

noticed that she wore no wedding band, but that her right hand was adorned with

one that might have been a wedding ring in happier times. Two fingers over from

that was a colossal opal, circled with diamonds. Under sharia law women should

present themselves modestly. American women would laugh at such a restriction if

indeed they had ever heard of the dictate. Ms. Garwood in particular. Her ample

bosom had closed many a real estate deal for her.

Money and beauty. This was intriguing enough to Karim that he felt a

stirring below the belt. It had been too long since he had enjoyed the essences of a

woman. And an older one always fascinated him. His first sexual experience had

been on a hot Persian day in the pistachio orchard where he and his brother made

summer money. A woman of the village, nearly twice his fifteen years, had

approached him to help her carry her basket to the collection trailer. When he went

with her to pick up her woven container he was surprised to see it was only half

filled. A series of astonishing events followed in close order. He had gone nuts

among the nuts. Twice.

Ms. Garwood woke him from his momentary reverie. She noticed his gaze

had lingered on her upper torso, a portion of her anatomy in which she took
THE HOBBY/McDougal 232

inordinate pride. She looked on her bust as being as important to her sales efforts as

her book of multiple listings. “So, Mr.Martin, you are looking for a rental house and

a warehouse. As you might have guessed, a small town like this does not present a

wide choice of properties from which to choose. But I do have a few things that

might interest you.”

“Ah, yes,” he said, “I’m sure you do. Tell me about them.”

She spun her chair around to face a computer monitor on the credenza

behind her desk. She turned it on and then leaned to her right and dragged a straight

back chair close to hers. Looking somewhat coquettishly over her shoulder, she

patted the chair seat and said, “Come sit here. All my properties are on line. We can

look at them together.”

Karim walked around the desk. As he passed behind her he could see down

her blouse to the valley between the hills of paradise. He sat next to Ms. Garwood.

The scent of Fracas perfume filled his nostrils. As she clicked her mouse, his mouse

began to click as well. She began a running commentary on the properties available.

Her arm was extended to reach the mouse pad. She leaned slightly to her right and

her breast brushed against Karim’s arm. It stayed there.

He interrupted her patter and said, “I will require a fairly large house. I am

going to be setting up a new distribution center for sporting goods and will have

workers and suppliers in and out frequently.”

She glanced at him and said, “That’s very interesting. What sort of goods

will you be handling? I might want to see if I can get a wholesale price from you.”

As she said this she grinned and leaned a tad closer.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 233

“That is a real possibility. When my shipments begin to arrive, I’ll invite

you over to see what I have.”

She asked, “Where are you living at the moment?”

“I have a boat at the Bald Head Island Marina. If I’m not being too bold, I

hope you’ll visit me there soon. Perhaps we could go for a cruise up to Morehead

City. I hear the seafood is really quite good there.”

She evolved visibly, her Southern Belle persona taking over. “Why, sir, that

is bold…but not too so. And by the way, my home is also on the island. I love it

there. Would you be interested in a beach house over there? There are some real

bargains right now. The summer season is over and there’re always a handful of

people who decide to unload their property this time of year.”

He did not want a house on Bald Head, but he wasn’t going to say so.

“That’s an excellent idea. Perhaps you could come to the marina tomorrow, say

about lunch time, and we could see what you have that I might be interested in. My

boat is called Cash Float”. He was again checking out the peek-a-boo portion of

her blouse, causing her to blush as she said, “Why, yes, I can do that. I have an

early morning appointment here in town, but I’ll catch the eleven o’clock ferry back

to the island. I want you to be my guest at the Shoals Club for lunch. The food is

delicious.”

He said, “Thank you. That’s very kind of you. I’ll look forward to

tomorrow…eagerly.”

She blushed again. “As will I.”

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 234

Chapter Thirty-four

As a matter of courtesy as well as curiosity, I called Joe Waldrip at the

hospital in Dallas. A nurse answered the phone.

“This is George Lampson. May I speak to Joe, please?’

“I’m sorry, but Mr. Waldrip can’t speak with you right now.”

I could hear Joe grumbling in the background, “Who in the hell is it, Janie

Baby?”

Janie Baby said with a bit of exasperation showing, “It’s a George

Lampson.”

“Give me the Goddamn phone. I need to talk to him.”

“Well, all right, but just for a couple of minutes.”

I could hear Waldrip ripping out his lungs in a whooping series of coughs.

Finally, he was able to rasp out a sentence. “Judge, glad you called. I can’t talk

long.”

I said, “Yeah, I know. How are you doing, Joe?”

“How in the hell does it sound like I’m doing? Lousy.”

“I’m sorry. “

“Don’t be. I’m getting no worse than I deserve. Look, Judge, there’s some

things about me that you don’t know.”

I said, “Maybe I know more than you think I do, Constantine.”

He was silent for ten or fifteen seconds before he said, “That name. How do

you know that name?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 235

“When you had coffee at my house, I tucked your cup in a baggy after you

left. A friend ran your prints. I’ve seen your rap sheet.”

“I told Grant you were too smart for us, that we needed a dumbass

mechanic…like me. But he wouldn’t listen. Anyway, who is taking my place? Is it

Kane?”

“Yes.”

“You’re lucky. He’s a stand up guy. He’s in the organization for the same

reason you and I are. Grant has the goods on him, too.”

“I thought as much. What’s his story?”

“He’s a thief and a con man. We got him from a contact in the NYPD bunko

squad. He would rather lie even when the truth would sound better. He’ll talk you

out of your socks if you let him. But he’ll also watch your back as though you’re

married to him. And Judge, he doesn’t see things the way I do, I mean, the way I

did.”

Another short spell of wheezing coughs.

I said, “Maybe you better rest, Constantine.”

He said, while gasping for enough breath to finish the conversation, “Judge,

listen, there aren’t five targets. Only three. You…oh, damn. The pain.” He coughed

a panting, rattling agonizing long moment. He gasped, “One more thing. Only

Grant and I know about what you did. He says, his secret. That’s it. I’m through.”

He hung up the phone.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 236

I snapped my cell phone shut and stared silently at the floor. Bitsy, next to

me on the lounge, said, “So the cat’s out of the bag. He knows we know. How did

he take that?”

I recounted the conversation I had just finished. “He wasn’t through telling

me whatever it was he wanted to get off his chest before he hung up. He’s in some

really great physical distress.”

Bitsy said, “Why would they tell you there were five people you needed

to…deal with, instead of three, if that is really the right number?”

“Worse case? They subscribe to the dictum that dead men…and their

wives…tell no tales. They wouldn’t ever want us to tell what we know, or more

specifically, what we will have done. So when I dispatch numero tres, I was

probably going to become Joe’s number one.”

“Those bastards. They don’t plan to ever let us off the hook. Our little

hideaway in Brazil, or wherever, isn’t going to materialize if they have their way.”

She took my hand. ”Duncan, this is scary.”

It was scary, all right, but not overwhelming. Joe/Constantine only validated

what I had suspected. And he had hinted that I really shouldn’t fear Kane. Well,

maybe yes, maybe no.

“Bitsy, the only way they’ll win is if we let them. I’m not going to let them.”

She did not sound terribly confident as she said, “I hope so. Oh, Lord, I

really do”

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 237

Chapter Thirty-five

Les Bladen called on Friday evening. “I’m in town, at the Essex House.

When do you want to meet?”

I tested him as I answered in Farsi, “Tomorrow at noon, here at my

apartment. I’ll fill you in then.”

He answered in the same dialect, “Should I bring lunch?”

“No, we’ll cook. You bring your appetite. The doorman will call me when

you get here and I’ll get you in.” I gave him the address and we rang off.

When he arrived the next day, he looked more like an Irishman than an

Iranian.

“You couldn’t pass for a Persian if you tried. We need a ruse that will

explain your red hair and freckles.”

“I may be ahead of you on that score. Grant said I was to be your petroleum

supplier in Iran who dealt with you before you retired. The truth is that in my other

life I was an American who operated a petroleum brokerage in the southern port

city of Bushehr. So you can see his choice of a cover for you was no accident. I

know the Bushehr area well and it would be hard for someone to trip me up. Grant

gave me a cover name of Dave O’Herlihy, with enough identification to pull it off.”

We spent the rest of the afternoon rehearsing possible scenarios that might

occur if indeed we met the Saids that evening.

Bitsy acted as inquisitor, asking common sense questions that Said or his

wife might ask.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 238

“How did you two first meet?”

“How much business did you do between the two of you?”

“Tell me about Bushehr, I have a cousin who lives there.”

“Are you married, Mr. O’Herlihy? How did your wife like Iran?”

And on through the afternoon. Occasionally, she would repeat a question,

which I thought was clever of her, and of course, it was.

I had decided that it might help my image as a wealthy oil man to arrive at

the marina restaurant in a limousine. When the limo dispatcher learned where we

were headed, she suggested we allow an hour to get there. “The Holland Tunnel is a

mess that time of day.”

The ride that evening was what I had expected, and the tunnel traffic is what

had been predicted, a God awful mess. Four lanes squeezing down to two and

eventually to one. The tube was old and looked it, with wall tiles missing and those

remaining, sooty and discolored. We arrived at the marina on time, though.

The restaurant was typically upscale, with a panoramic view of lower

Manhattan, the lights of the towers rippling and glinting in the dark Hudson. We

were led toward our table by the hostess, a young Asian girl whose name tag read

‘Lily’. As we passed through the room, I spotted the Saids almost at once. They

were seated at a window table, which appeared to be the best one in the house. Miss

Lily ushered us to a table across the room, but before we could be seated, Bitsy

exclaimed to the hostess, pointing to a table adjacent to Alfred Said’s, “Oh, what a

marvelous view. Please, could we possible be seated over there?”

It was becoming more evident every day that Bitsy was a natural.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 239

I did not want to appear tacky, but I thought, ‘What the hell’ as I offered the

hostess a twenty ‘for the inconvenience’. She apparently had no such compunction

against tackiness as she tucked the bill into the bosom of her dress. As we settled

into our much better chairs, I said in Farsi to O’Herlihy, “My, what a magnificent

view.”

He answered, “Yes, it is. Think how much more impressive it must have

been before 9/11.”

I said, “For some, perhaps. I rather like the open space that it left. And we

won’t miss the Jews who were there, will we?”

I glanced casually toward Said as I said that. He did not react, other than to

let the smallest hint of a smile raise his cheeks ever so slightly. I was trolling in new

waters, with a well baited hook. If I got a strike, it would be more than I expected

for a first try.

Dave continued to speak in Farsi. “You’re such a hardhead, George. I think

I would like to change the subject. So, when is the big day? When are you flying to

the Bahamas to bring that marvelous sailboat back?”

Before I could answer, Bitsy did her part to get us out of the Farsi mode

before we screwed up. “Come on, guys, let me in on the conversation.”

“Sorry, Honey, we’re just showing off a bit. There are darned few

Americans who can speak Farsi.”

She said, “You’re rudeness is forgiven, my dear.”

I said, “Dave was asking when I’m going to be bringing ‘Winged Edith’ up

from the Bahamas. As you can guess, Dave, sailing a seventy foot Swan is not a job
THE HOBBY/McDougal 240

for a single-handed sailor. As soon as I can find enough experienced volunteers to

crew her, we’ll get under way. Actually, I’m hoping some of the boaters here at this

yacht club might want to give it a go. I plan to ask Herman Greeley, the dock

manager here, if he can help me find a few folks who might want to spend a

glorious week under sail. Edith has volunteered to supervise the galley, so we will

need to recruit about six more hardy souls.”

Dave said, “I’d love to do it, but seasickness is not something I ever want to

suffer again.”

Bitsy said, “Try ginger snaps. They work for me.”

“I’ve tried everything, including ginger snaps, ginger ale, ginger root and a

girl named Ginger. Nothing works.”

Laughing, I said, “You’re excused. Too bad, too. You have the reputation of

the Irish to uphold. Saint Brendan, the patron saint of sailors, was an Irishman.”

Our food arrived and it was superb. I had the grouper and it couldn’t have

been better. We exchanged small talk as we ate. Later, we were sitting back to

enjoy an after dinner coffee when Alfred Said and his wife got up to leave the

restaurant.

As the Saids passed our table he stopped, a broad smile on his face. “I’m

sorry to intrude, but my big ears could not help but overhear of your impending

adventure. A Swan 70. What a magnificent vessel.”

Mentally, I yanked back on my rod and set the hook deeply into Mr. Said’s

jaw. I stood and put out my hand. “I’m George Lampson. This is my wife, Edith,

and my friend, David O’Herlihy.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 241

He said, “I’m Alfred Said. My wife, Ghodsi.” He grinned then as he

switched to Farsi, “There are more Farsi speakers than you may have thought. Here

are two more.”

“Well, the old saying about it being a small world was never more true. I

hope nothing I said offended you. I’m happy to meet you.”

Said retrieved a silver card case from his pocket and opened it. He handed

me his card, which proclaimed him to be the president of Banco J. G. de Honduras,

N.A. He said, “I heard only a pleasant conversation between two friends. Please, if it

is not a great imposition on my part, give me a call at your convenience. I would be

most interested in hearing about your proposed sailing trip from the Bahamas.”

Ghodsi laughed, “Sailing. His great passion. Sometimes I wish I were a

boat.”

Bitsy smiled. “Now there’s something I can identify with.”

I said, addressing Mr. Said, and hoping not to betray my exultation, “Yes,

thank you very much Mr. Said. Perhaps I can do that.”

Said said, “Well, then good night.”

As I sat back down, O’Herlihy said quietly, “It was as though we had a

script and he had read it. Grant was on the money, Judge, when he said you could

get next to anyone. You would have made a great partner for me.”

“Oh?”

“Oops. Shouldn’t have said that. The bourbon has loosened my jaw.’”

Bitsy smiled . “Oh, come on, Les. We’re old friends, aren’t we?”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 242

Les grinned and said, “What the hell. Sure we are, I guess. The truth of the

matter is I was an almost completely successful con man. I operated from Iran

legitimately for years working with a half dozen refiners here in the states. We

developed a rapport based on trust. It occurred to me a few years ago that I could

capitalize on that faith by pulling off one huge career-end scam. I got four U.S.

firms to advance a total of eight million for a bargain basement buy of a huge

amount of crude at 15% below market price. I gave them the wink-wink about

baksheesh and they swallowed it. The money went into my Swiss account and I

went over the hill. Believe it or not, I pulled it off. However, there was an ‘uh oh’ in

there that I hadn’t planned on. One of my victims owned a private company in

Texas. He was a pal of the President. He got the prez to use the resources of the

federal government to track me down and haul me in. I thought I was safe, in a

backwater spot in Brazil called Porto Alegre. One morning I got up to find three

goons in my bedroom. The next day I was in the federal lockup in D.C. And now

you know how I got Shanghaied into this company of devils. And by the way, the

only one Grant made me pay back was the guy who sic’d the President on me.”

Bitsy said, “It would be nice to meet even one person in this whole bloody

mess who is not a sinner.”

I said, “Sorry, my dear, but that is not likely. Not likely at all.”

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 243

Chapter Thirty-six

Karim opened his e-mail aboard ‘Cash Float’ and found an encrypted

message from Seyed Mahmood. He got his copy of “Up Country” from the book

rack and began the laborious task of decoding. When he had completed the job, he

reread the communication.

“I am sending Kahlil al-Udhma to assist you in your endeavor. He is a

worthy mujahadin who has been trained personally by me. Treat him as your

number two man. He will be driving a small van containing armaments for your

mission. Please forward to me the details of your plan as it progresses. As you

know, you were selected for this undertaking because of your ingenuity and

flexibility. But I can not remain in the dark. I must know soon what you plan to do.

Do not neglect to keep me informed. Also, do not send your future communications

to the banker. Send them directly to me. I have confidence in this cipher.”

Karim sat back in the captain’s chair and rubbed his cheek with his hand.

Mahmood was getting nervous. Too bad. He said aloud to himself, “I will let him

know what I want him to know, and nothing more. I do not want someone who is

not on site to try to make decisions for me. And as far as Brother al-Udhma is

concerned, it’s obvious he is being sent to act as an information conduit back to

Mahmood. That will be no great problem as long as I am careful around the man.”

His thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the hull. He frowned as he slid

the pad between pages of the book and placed it in the drawer of the nav station

desk.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 244

“Permission to come aboard, Captain Martin?”

It was Josephine Garwood, dressed in a swirl of white. Her skirt was above

her knees, which accentuated her great legs. He went to the stern rail and gave her a

hand aboard. She gushed, in her southern drawl, “My, what a beautiful boat.”

“Would you like a tour, Ms. Garwood?”

“Please, call me Josie. And yes, I’m dying to see what you have.”

He overlooked the mild double entendre. He said, “And you shall see…it.”

She marveled at the complete galley. “My word, Mr. Martin, is that a

dishwasher?” Karim told her, “A lot of this stuff I can’t use when I’m under way,

but it's nice when I’m plugged into shore power, like now.”

He showed her the captain’s stateroom, with its walk around double bed and

the head which featured a full shower. She said, “I’m very impressed, Mr. Martin.

This is like a floating RV. And I do hope we can go for that cruise up the

intracoastal soon. I’d love that.”

“Please, call me David. And we shall take that trip before too long, I

promise. But now, I would like to take you to lunch.”

She said, “This time lunch is on me. As I mentioned yesterday, I’ve made

reservations at the Shoals Club. And my golf cart is at the end of the dock.”

The road to the Shoals Club ran the length of the island. A portion of the

thoroughfare bisected the Maritime Forest Preserve. Karim said, “This is a very

beautiful forest. It conjures up thoughts of the woods near the place where I grew

up.”

She asked, “Where was that.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 245

He had made a slip of the lip. His thoughts had been of Iran. He said hastily,

“Oh, New Hampshire. Yes, near Concord.”

“It must be quite nice there. You must meet Doctor Welch. He’s retired here

from New Hampshire.”

The club was located on Cape Fear, at the tip end of the island.

Over lunch, Karim pumped her for as much information as he could obtain.

He was particularly interested in the Thanksgiving Fish Fry Festival.

“Well, I’m not sure how successful that will be. It’s the first time it’s been

tried. The promoter is our local doofus, Johnson Gounod. He has gotten an

agreement from the village council to section off a half-mile of the beach for the

event. Since that august body includes most of the real estate folks in the area,

myself among them, we agreed to it, provided he lets us set up booths to offer our

services to the people who show up. That ticked him off somewhat, since he had

envisioned a captive audience for Gounod Enterprises.”

Karim said, “You are a sharp business woman. Can I trust you to find the

best price for me?”

She reached across the table and touched his hand, a trick taught in

salesmanship 101. “Why, of course, David. You can bet on it.”

After lunch, they walked outside and stood by the pool for a moment. She

said, “I would hope that you might let me put your name forward for membership

here at the Shoals. Even in the winter, it’s the hub of Bald Head’s social life.”

“Yes, I’m sure it is. But for now, I’m more interested in finding shelter.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 246

“Of course you are. Let’s go. I have some really exciting homes to show

you.”

“That will be fine. And while we’re out and about, perhaps you could show

me where the city facilities, the fire and the police, are.”

They got into her golf cart and headed back up Federal Road, turning left at

South Bald Head Wynd. This avenue took them along the beachfront. At the corner

of Loggerhead Trail, she pulled the vehicle over and stopped. Pointing west, she

said, “The festival will be held here and run for about a half mile in that direction.

The main attraction band stand will be set up between Inverness and Dunedin

Streets. The biggest crowd will probably gather about two in the afternoon. My

booth will be set up next to the event platform. If this thing turns out to be a winner,

we’ll probably do it every year. And coincidentally, Southport Security will be all

over the place. S.S., Inc. is another one of my firms.”

A small alarm went off in Karim’s head. “Heavy security? Why is that

necessary?

“We aren’t sure what to expect. If we’re invaded by a bunch of drunks and

druggies, we want to be ready. And believe me, we will be prepared.”

“Are your men armed? Surely you wouldn’t shoot drunks having fun?”

“Oh, Heavens no. They have batons, but no firearms.”

Trying not to show his relief, Karim said wryly, “It has all the earmarks of

being a success. I hope that it will be…for your sake.”

“That’s sweet of you.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 247

She moved the gear lever into drive and the electric cart glided toward

Muscadine Wynd. After stopping twice to show homes, they arrived at a small

shopping area where the police and fire departments were located. His charge was

to kill as many Americans as he could on Bald Head Island. It was clear now where

and when he would accomplish this.

When Josie Garwood delivered him to the dock that evening, she expected

to be invited aboard. When an invitation was not forthcoming, she pouted. “I

thought it might be nice to see the sunset from the stern of Cash Float.”

“I’m sorry, Josie, but I have several phone calls to make. It is very tempting

to want to spend the evening with someone as beautiful as you, but I really must

take care of business. It can’t wait, I’m afraid. There will be other sunsets, I’m

sure.”

She sighed and said, “I’ll accept that as a rain check.”

“Good. I’ll call you soon.”

Later that night he amended the previously unsent message. He added, “The

date certain of the attack will be November 25th, America’s Thanksgiving Day. A

large gathering is expected for a fish feast. Praise Allah and the fishes of the sea.”

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 248

Chapter Thirty-seven

Back at the apartment, I mixed us each a King Alphonse after-dinner drink.

We sat around the living room sharing banter about our successful opening night at

the Hudson View Marina Restaurant.

Bitsy said, “The very least we should have gotten is four curtain calls.”

“And you, my dear, deserve a huge bouquet of roses. Getting us the table

next to the Saids was a master stroke.”

I addressed Les Bladen. His assignment had been to help me hook Said.

That mission accomplished, I decided to cut him loose.

“Les, it was a pleasure doing business with you, but now I believe it would

be best if you take off. No use making this thing any more complicated than it has

to be.”

He nodded in agreement. “I should get back to Los Angeles soon anyway.

The organization has something going on in Hollywood and I’m the star.”

Bitsy said, “Oh, a Hollywood star. Tell us more.”

He shook his head. “No can do, Bitsy, though after seeing you two in action,

I believe you would be a welcome addition to our cast. Maybe when we have our

wrap party I’ll invite you and the Judge.”

He picked up the phone and booked a flight for the following morning. That

accomplished, he asked me, “So how did you get roped into the organization,

Judge?”

I said, “What did Grant tell you.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 249

“Nothing. When I asked, he clammed up.”

“It was parking tickets.”

He smiled. “Okay.” He looked at me expectantly. “He didn’t tell me what

was so important about Mr. Said, either.”

“Ah, curiosity. Les, if you were a cat, you’d be dead by now, I’m sure.”

He said to Bitsy, “I’m not going to get anything out of him, am I?”

“Nope.”

“Well, when you write your book, Judge, send me a copy. And now, I’m

going to head for the luxury of the Essex House, which Grant is paying for.”

We shook hands and he kissed Bitsy on the cheek.

As I ushered him to the door, he said, “I really don’t know what Grant

promised you, Judge, but I would take it with a big grain of salt. I have a suspicion

that we will find it damned difficult to be free of him and whoever the hell it is that

pulls his strings. I suggest you think about developing an exit strategy.”

He opened the door and we shook hands once again. There was a strange

sadness in his eyes that caused me to shudder inwardly. He had given me something

to think about. It occurred to me that dispensing death was not as unsettling as

contemplating my own. He showed a wry smile. “Didn’t mean to spook you. Good

luck.”

“Thanks. You, too.”

After he left, I locked the door and walked slowly back to the den.

Bitsy said, “I liked him. I wonder if we’ll ever see him again.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 250

“Probably not. Grant seems to have taken a page from the al Qaeda

instruction manual. While the terrorists operate many cells, they have a rule that

insulates one from the other. You noticed we didn’t get anything from him, and he

certainly didn’t get anything from us.”

Bitsy said, “How about another King Alphonse? Maybe with a little more

cream this time.”

As I was filling the bar order, she asked, “When are you going to call Alfred

Said?”

“This is Saturday. Next business day at the bank is Monday. I’ll let him

dream for an extra day. I think Tuesday will be the best time.”

“What are you going to tell him?”

“Let’s kick that one around. I think a straightforward approach is probably

the best bet. I’ve had a lot of success with K.I.S.S. ‘Keep it simple, stupid’.”

“Good thinking. How involved do you want me to be?”

“If he wants to get together with his wife and you, then we should probably

do that. However, he is a Muslim man, and she didn’t sound as though she liked

sailing, so I believe we will be mano a mano, more than likely.”

Bitsy thought for a moment. “That sounds right. I’ll sit it out, unless you

need me.”

We sat pensively, each pondering the immediate challenge. Bitsy said,

“Duncan, do you ever think about the futility of all this. People have fought evil for

centuries. War after war has been waged for freedom, and here we are doing it

again. What we’re engaged in is like chipping away at a hundred foot tall statue of
THE HOBBY/McDougal 251

Baal with a toy hammer. It all seems so useless. I remember a story I read, maybe in

college, I’m not sure, but it was about a group of soldiers. They were on a rainy,

windswept hillside. It was cold and they were huddled around a campfire. They

wore grey ponchos. It was impossible to determine what army they were in. Each,

in turn, told his story. It soon became evident they were from different armies,

different times and different wars. One was a Roman soldier, another a Confederate

trooper from Virginia. A G.I. who had died on Iwo Jima spoke last. He said, “Dear

God, it will never end, will it?” It’s all so discouraging.

I nodded my head. “I know we’re probably just fighting a holding action,

but I can’t quit. Not quite yet.”

Bitsy looked like she was about to cry, but she didn’t. “Well, I love you,

Duncan. Your windmills are my windmills.”

I kissed her. She was right of course. I realized I was a lethal Don Quixote.

The only difference being I’m not as crazy as he was…I think.

By the time Tuesday rolled around, I had decided to drop in on Said rather

than to call him. I took the ‘6’ subway train down to Little Italy and got off. A short

walk, fragrant with the smell of garlic and oregano, got me to the ‘M’ line, which in

turn carried me to the Broad Street Station. I love the subway, even though half the

people in it appear to be terrorists or related to terrorists. Hey, just kidding.

Broad Street is more like Wall Street than Wall Street. A number of world

famous brokerage houses are headquartered along its length. The New York Stock

Exchange is located there, just south of Wall. With all the prestige to be found there

I was surprised to find that the entrance to the Banco J. G. de Honduras, N.A. was
THE HOBBY/McDougal 252

but an old oaken door from which the varnish had long ago cracked and peeled off.

The brass plaque adjacent to the entrance appeared not to have been polished

regularly, if at all. I pushed through the entrance and climbed up a long, scuffed

wooden stairway. At the top was a small hallway. An unmarked door was on the

left and the only other door, on the right, had a frosted glass panel that went

halfway down. On it in black letters was painted the name of the bank.

I pushed the portal open and entered a small reception room. It didn’t look

like any bank I had ever been in. The walls were paneled in cheap mahogany. An

equally cheap looking receptionist sat behind a desk straight out of the Office Depot

catalog. A young Middle Eastern man was perched on the corner of her desk. She

was laughing at something he had said when she noticed me.

She said, in a broad Bronx accent, “May I help you, Sir?”

The young comedian stood and said, “Back to work for me.” He left the

room. I heard him open and close the door across the hall.

“I’d like to see Mr. Said. My name is George Lampson.”

She looked puzzled. “Is he expecting you?”

“No, I’m just an acquaintance. I was in the neighborhood and thought I

would drop in.”

She said, in that damned huffy New York manner that spoils an otherwise

great city, “Well, this is highly unusual. I’ll ask if he can see you. Please wait a

minute.”

She rose and headed for the inner sanctum. She was a flouncer, and pretty

good at it. She went into the next room and closed the door. I found it interesting
THE HOBBY/McDougal 253

that this bank was not used to people coming by unannounced. Almost at once she

was back, holding the door open. Alfred Said came out, a wide smile on his face

and his hand outstretched. He was obviously happy to see me. It was mutual.

“Mr. Lampson. So glad to see you again. Please come in.”

His office was the only thing that fit the description of what I would have

expected to find in a bank. It was sumptuous. A rich maroon carpet underfoot, with

solid oak antique office furniture. His desk was a table, just distressed enough to

appear to be nineteenth century. Behind the desk was a traditional highbacked

leather chair with four solid legs, no swivel. And behind the chair was a roll top

desk where it was obvious he did his presidential work. Another chair faced the

second desk. Several files were stacked there next to a computer. And above that

was the sailboat painting I had seen in his file. From my vantage point, it appeared

to be a genuine painting by someone named James Edward Buttersworth. The small

brass nameplate on the frame bore the title, ‘Heading Home’. I made a mental note

to check out Buttersworth on the internet.

There was no overhead lighting, but several lamps glowed on small side

tables scattered along the walls. A larger lamp, probably a Tiffany, was on the

table/desk. Three side chairs faced his desk.

“Please sit down, Mr. Lampson. May I offer you some refreshments?”

“Coffee would be nice, if it’s not too much trouble.”

“But of course. Maizie, please bring us coffee.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 254

Maizie? I had to suppress a laugh on that one. I said, “I apologize for not

calling ahead, but I was in the neighborhood and thought I would take a chance on

catching you.”

He seemed a bit cagey at first. “No explanation is necessary. I am glad you

chose to visit. I am curious. What is your profession?”

“I’m retired. I was an importer of petroleum products.”

“You are fortunate to have been able to retire at a young age. I envy that.

And your Farsi speaking friend?”

“He was my supplier. Iranian oil. He operates an oil brokerage in Bushehr.

He’s in the States looking for new customers.”

“He seemed a pleasant fellow.”

“Yes, he is.”

“And I assume you learned Farsi as part of your business?”

“Not exactly. My first wife, who is deceased, was second generation Iranian.

Her parents never learned English, so I learned their language in order to be a

respectful son-in-law. It was this knowledge that helped me to seek a connection in

Iran, which turned out to be O’Herlihy.”

“Ah, life is quite complex, is it not? We never know where it might take us.”

“And so it is.”

I steered the conversation away from Les as smoothly as I could. “Your

office is quite impressive. What sort of services does Banco J. G. de Honduras

provide?”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 255

“We are not what you would call a traditional bank. We serve more as a

facilitator. We assist investors who wish to place their money in Central American

enterprises. We also help channel funds from the World Bank. For a small fee, of

course.” Hmm, I thought. This guy is a bigger bullshit artist than I am.

I said, “That’s interesting. I have thought about some land purchases in

Costa Rica. Perhaps you could assist me in that.”

Now it was his turn to guide the conversation in a different path. “How long

have you been a sailing enthusiast, Mr. Lampson?”

As I was about to answer, Maizie entered with the coffee. He said, “A

special Turkish blend. Very pungent, but quite delicious.”

“I’m sure I’ll like it. And by the way, please call me George.”

“And I am Alfred.”

Pals already, I thought. Grant will be very proud of me when he hears about

this.

As I sat across from the son of a bitch I wondered why I had wasted any

time contemplating what his motivation had been to be involved in the terror

network. That he was a part of it was what mattered, and I shouldn’t give a shit

what perverse reasoning had induced him to join those assholes. Maybe his brother

had talked him into it. Maybe he simply wanted to get rich off of skimming their

money. Maybe he hated Jews. Maybe, maybe, maybe. Well, maybe I was going to

make him my big number twenty-two.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 256

I got back to his question. “I began sailing when I was a kid. My folks had a

summer place on Lake George. I broke in on dinghies and gradually moved up to

the Swan.”

“Ah, yes, the Swan. A seventy-footer you said?”

“Yes.”

“How does she handle? I’ve never sailed a boat that large. My Catalina 36 is

the biggest I have ever been on.”

“I just bought her, and except for the demonstration cruise, from Port

Lucaya to West End on Grand Bahama Island, I’ve never been out on her before or

since. And the West End Marina is where she lies now. As far as handling goes, she

is easier than most boats I’ve sailed. All electric Lewmar winches, for instance. No

heave ho.”

“Then this will be a great adventure for you, sailing her up the Gulf Stream

to New York. Have you had any luck finding a crew?”

“A little. I still have three slots to fill. I had hoped to use only amateurs like

me, who would go for the love of sailing, but it looks as though I may have to hire a

couple of hands.”

I felt like holding my breath to see if he would rise to the bait. He said,

“When would you be making the voyage?”

“Soon, before the weather turns nasty.”

With his eagerness showing, he said, “I know we have just met, but I would

like to offer my services as a deck hand. I would love to make that trip with you.”

I tried to look surprised. “You would? I’m not sure…”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 257

He was obviously disappointed, but pressed on. “I am a good sailor, George.

And never a sign of mal de mer.”

I would let him sell me. I said, “It’s just that it will probably be an arduous

journey. Are you sure you would be up to it, physically, I mean?”

“Oh, yes. I work out every day.”

“And you could spare ten days away from the bank? You have someone

who would fill in for you? I wouldn’t want you to be worrying about anything but

sailing the Winged Edith.”

“That would not be a problem. My Data Processing Manager, Ghadir Al-

Sassani, can handle things for that period of time. I really want to make this trip. It

would be the highlight of my sailing career.”

I assumed that Ghadir was the young guy who was flirting with Maizie

when I arrived. Now I knew his name, where the computers were and, since he

would be left in charge, the probable number of employees. It looked like there

were just three, counting el presidente.

The hook was embedded deeply, and now it was time to reel him in. “Well,

I have a good feeling about you, Alfred. Welcome aboard. It will be an honor to

have you with me.”

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 258

Chapter Thirty-eight

Bitsy laughed out loud when I told her how things had gone. “You know,

Les Bladen was right. You would have made a great con man.”

“Have you forgotten I was a politician before I got into this racket?”

“Ah, ha! Of course. But what comes next?”

“I’ve been thinking about that. I can visualize several ways to administer the

coup de grace to that bastard, but think about this, Bitsy. What if we could lay our

hands on the bank records at the same time? We would know where all his terrorist

pals are. Don Grant could send some of his people after them. We could set those

sons of bitches back ten years.”

She said, “So are you going to tell Grant about that?”

“Can’t get around it. If we want to heist the computer data, I’ll need help.”

Frowning, she asked, “And you think he’ll act on that information?”

I cocked my head as I answered, “Sure, why wouldn’t he?”

“Maybe because it doesn’t fit his game plan. You know, if there’s another

horrific attack, it might finally move those fools in Washington to quit their

bickering and by God do something. That might be what Grant and his people really

want.”

I shook my head. “My, you’re getting cynical. No, Bitsy, I don’t think so. If

our job is to fuck up terrorists, why would he pass up a chance to go way beyond

that and crush them?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 259

She shrugged. “It was just a thought. You’re probably right. I worry too

much, I guess.” I could tell she was still not convinced. But at that point, neither

was I.

“I’m going to call Grant this evening. First, I need to think through my

strategy to nail Alfred Said. In the meantime, let’s go out to someplace really nice

and get something to eat.”

We took a cab back down to Little Italy, where I had been that afternoon. As

we strolled down Mulberry Street, I said, “You pick the restaurant, Bitsy.”

She said, “I’ll let my nose do the choosing. Then you check to see if the

Sopranos are in there before we take a table.”

I laughed and squeezed her waist. “Bitsy, I’m falling more in love with you

every day. Maybe I don’t show it enough, but I do respect your judgment.

Sometimes I tend to move ahead too quickly.”

“Well, it sure took you a long time to figure that out.”

“Maybe a day late, but I’m on the money with this.”

“You’d better be, Mr. Travis.”

She chose ‘Il Troubadour’, which sounded as good as it smelled. Live

mandolin music and red checked tablecloths were the lure. There is something

about being in Manhattan that is different than any other place I have ever been.

Except for the Maizies, I was going to hate leaving when the time came.

Over a glass of red, I said, “How does this sound? I take Said down to

Grand Bahama. I do the deed there. Obviously he has to be out of touch with the

bank while someone from our bunch goes in and gets the files. Taking him out
THE HOBBY/McDougal 260

while in the Bahamas will make it a bit more difficult for the authorities to figure

out what the hell happened. To the Bahamians, he will be a foreigner. Killing him

in the U.S. would be more dangerous because law enforcement would be able to

I.D. him almost immediately, either through fingerprints, dental records or whatever

else the real FBI uses. For all I know, they may analyze his navel lint. At any rate,

I’ve been over there before and I know the lay of the land. If I remember correctly,

her name was Delonia.”

She laughed, “Shame on you, Duncan.” Then, on a more serious note, she

asked, “I have wanted to ask you for some time. Have you ever not gotten the

person you set out to get? And could it happen this time?”

“The answer is yes…and yes. Twice I’ve had to back off. Once because the

subject would not move in the direction I wanted. He must have smelled a rat. The

other time, the man I was after became the hunter. He was a guy who preyed on

people he thought might have money, killing them and cleaning out their bank

accounts with stolen credit cards. He thought my friendly overtures made me an

ideal next vic for him. He brought out a gun just as I was about to make my move. I

pulled a Wyatt Earp and shot him in the arm, then ran for my life. He was too fat to

chase me far. I never went back. And to answer your second question, there is never

a sure fire cinch in this business. Alfred Said is a smart man. Some men have a

weakness for women or money or gambling or whatever. It’s usually the chance to

fulfill some unsatisfied urge that propels them to try something new. In Alfred

Said’s case, it’s adventure. He loves sailing, but he’s never had a true ocean

journey, one that pits man against nature, so to speak. But he’s not a dummy. I feel
THE HOBBY/McDougal 261

safe in saying that I was probably smarter than all my previous subjects. I can’t say

that with any degree of certainty about the banker.”

Bitsy said, “This is not reassuring me, Duncan. Please be careful. I don’t

want to set the world’s speed record in becoming a widow.”

I looked at her over my glass. “That’s another thing we agree on.” I glanced

at the dessert menu. “And now, let’s try the chocolate amaretti cake. It looks good

enough to eat.” When I looked up, she was crying.

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 262

Chapter Thirty-nine

The three-bedroom rental house Josie Garwood finally leased to David

Martin was one she owned. It had sat empty for six months. It was located on a

quiet cul-de-sac in the better part of town (better being a relative term. Southport is

not Hilton Head.). She had high-balled the price and he hadn’t quibbled. She also

had signed him to a lease on a small warehouse she owned about two miles from

the residence.

She was somewhat miffed that Martin had seemed to lose interest in

consummating a romantic liaison with her once their business had been completed.

She had been flaunting their relationship among her friends. To save her beautiful

face, she dropped hints that he might be gay. She shelved the idea of suggesting him

for membership at the Shoals Club.

Kahlil al-Udhma arrived in Southport three days after Karim acquired the

house. When he knocked on Karim’s door, he looked like a cartoon version of a

terrorist. A five-inch beard hung from his chin. He wore a long-sleeved Cairo shirt

and cotton baggy pants. A cotton turban hat sat atop his head. When Karim opened

the door, Kahlil bowed slightly and said, “Salaam aleikoom. I am Kahlil al-Udhma.

I believe you may be expecting me.”

Karim said with obvious anger, “You fucking fool. Come in quickly, before

one of my red neck neighbors sees you and calls Homeland Security.” He reached

out and grabbed Kahlil’s shirt front and pulled him inside.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 263

Karim said, “This is Southport, North Carolina, not Tehran or New York,

you idiot. And you are supposed to be my number two man in this operation? I

don’t think so. As soon as we unload the van, Mr. Muslim, you shall be on your

way back to Brooklyn. In the meantime, come with me. I have American clothes I

will give to you.”

Kahlil was shaken. He said, “I’m sorry, Karim al-Hadji. No one told me

how to dress or really, what to expect. I am here to help you. I thought I would be

greeted as a brother in arms, not as a fuckup. If you send me back, I will be

disgraced. And Seyed Mahmood will be very angry with me. Please, let me stay and

help…please.”

Karim said, “Well, if you can somehow get your shit together and keep it

there, I’ll give you a chance. Maybe. But for now, let’s make an American out of

you. Come with me.”

Karim took a shirt and a pair of jeans from a closet and handed them to

Kahlil. “Give me the keys to the van. Then go in the bathroom and shave off that

beard. And don’t give me any shit about growing it for Allah. Allah wants us to kill

infidels, and we can’t do it if we are wearing a sign on our face that telegraphs our

intentions. You do what I tell you without argument, do you understand?”

“Yes, I do.” This was the first time any Muslim had spoken to Kahlil in that

manner. The truth was that Kahlil was the former Thomas Garrity, a last year’s

graduate of Brown University, who had converted from collegiate agnosticism to

Mohammedanism while a senior. He had been a foreign language major,

specializing in Middle Eastern languages. His exposure to these courses led to a


THE HOBBY/McDougal 264

study of Muslim ideology. He was swept up in the romance of the battle between

the true believers and everyone else. He had thrown in his lot with the followers of

Allah and had been lauded frequently for his acumen in being able to see whose

side would eventually prevail. He loved the attention, since he had previously

gotten very little of that in his young life. He hoped to someday win the hearts and

bodies of his allotted seventy-two virgins in Paradise, which would be six dozen

more than he had had here on earth. And the beard had been a welcome bonus. It

had hidden his acne and weak chin.

Karim went out to the driveway and opened the back of the van. Inside were

three unmarked wooden crates. A small valise was in the passenger’s seat. He took

the suitcase out and carried it back into the house. Inside, he set it on the kitchen

table and opened it. It contained only clothes and a small kit bag with soap and

deodorant.

Kahlil came into the room, looking like an All-American dork. Karim asked,

“You have no personal weapon?”

“No. Mahmood said it would get me in trouble if I were to be stopped by the

police.”

“He was right about that. Let me see your driver’s license.”

Kahlil pulled his wallet out and handed it to Karim. It contained a New York

commercial driver’s license, a Visa card and two hundred dollars. “You had no

trouble on your trip?”

“No. I am a careful driver.”

“Good. Now come with me.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 265

They went back to the van and before they got in Karim said, “You drive. I

want to see if you really are a cautious motorist.”

Out on the street, Karim issued terse instructions to his new Number Two,

directing him to the warehouse. The facility was a stand alone wood frame building,

badly in need of paint. Karim had already had a local sign painter write the name of

his pseudo business on the walk-in entrance next to the overhead door. In red

letters, it said ‘All-Sports Distribution’. The day after Karim had firmed up the lease

he called Carolina Security and made arrangements to meet one of their technicians

at the building. His orders were to install a silent alarm system with motion

detectors and door intrusion detection strips. The tech indicated that the alarm

would notify the police by phone connection if a break in occurred. Karim had the

man make the notification go to a buzzer in his house and not to the police. He said,

“I’ll call the cops myself.”

When Kahlil stopped the truck in the driveway of the warehouse, Karim

alighted and unlocked the small door. He went inside and pulled the chain hoist

which opened the main entry. He called to Kahlil to turn the truck around and back

it into the warehouse. Once inside, he reversed the chain and lowered the overhead

door.

“And now let me see what you have brought us.”

They unloaded the boxes and set them in a neat row along the side wall.

Each box was stenciled in black with the legend, ‘Sporting goods’. Karim asked,

“Do you know what is in these crates?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 266

“No, not for sure. I’m aware of what they are supposed to contain, but I did

not witness their packing.”

“Where did you get them?”

“They were in the back of the Al-Fatih Mosque in Brooklyn. Before that, I

don’t know where they came from.”

“Okay. Take this crowbar and prize the lids off the boxes, and be careful.”

As Kahlil took off the pine tops, Karim removed the contents of each and

stacked them in front of the box. The inventory consisted of eight Tec-9 9mm

machine pistols and 200 50-round magazines, fully loaded.

Karim was pleased. There was much more ammunition than he had

expected. He said, “Kahlil, place the Tec-9’s on that work bench by the back wall.

You’ll find a can of gun solvent, a barrel rod and several clean cotton rags in the

cupboard below the table. Clean the cosmoline off the weapons and then put them

back in the crate.”

While Number Two was performing his task, Karim double checked each of

the boxes to make certain there was nothing else besides the ammo in them. When

Kahlil had completed the weapons clean-up, he helped him place them back in their

cases.

He looked the area over to make sure there were not any obvious telltale

signs that this might be a terrorist’s lair, then instructed his assistant to open the

main door. When it was raised, he backed the van out and then leaned out of the

window and said, “Close the door and come out through the pedestrian exit.” While
THE HOBBY/McDougal 267

Kahlil was taking care of that chore, Karim got out of the truck and met Kahlil

when he came out. He said, “Get in the van. You drive again. I’m going to lock up.”

On there way back to the house, Karim said, “I’m going to keep you on the

project. With a bit of training you might become a worthy participant.”

Kahlil was much relieved. “Hey, thanks Boss. I’ll do a good job. I promise.”

Karim said, “Boss. I like that. Yes, I’m the boss. Don’t forget it.”

Two blocks from the house, they passed the Piggly Wiggly grocery store.

Karim noted the advertising marquee out front which said, “Order your turkey

today. Only two weeks until thanksgiving.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 268

Chapter Forty

When I finished with breakfast the morning after my meeting with my new

crew member, I dug out the number that Able Kane had given me. I punched in the

digits and he answered on the second buzz. He must have had caller I.D. He said,

“Good morning, Judge. Having fun yet?”

“Yeah, probably more than you. I need a sit down with you and Grant, the

sooner the better.”

“What’s up?”

“I’ll tell you when I see you.”

“Can’t we do this on the phone? It’s hard to get Grant out of Dallas.”

“I’ll go there if necessary. I’m about ready to close the deal on our friend

and I have some last minute stuff that has to be settled. I won’t go forward until we

get together and discuss it.”

Kane sounded slightly peeved when he said, “Okay. I’ll get back to you as

soon as I can.” He hung up.

While I was having my conversation with Kane, Bitsy had taken Said’s file

out and had been going over it once more, looking for some small item she and I

might have overlooked. She had almost closed the folder when she noticed an

interesting tidbit about Said’s wife, Ghodsi, which we both had missed up until

now. Mrs. Said was a naturalized American citizen who had emigrated to the U.S.

in 1980. Her brother, Salim Jarsan, was a high official in the Institute for Political

and International Studies in Tehran.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 269

Bitsy said, pointing to the file, “Take a look at this, Duncan. I believe we

may have a problem with Alfred Said’s wife as well.”

I read the section she had underlined. Bitsy said, “I think Ghodsi may be a

major player in this business. I wouldn’t be surprised if Mr. Said is the President of

Banco J. G. de Honduras, N.A. because of her connections. I believe she may have

gotten him the job. And if that’s the case, if something…unfortunate…happened to

her husband, she could step in and take over his position without missing a beat. It

has also occurred to me that she is the only person besides her husband who has

seen us all together. When he goes off to sail the bounding main and never returns,

she’ll be able to I.D. us.”

I didn’t respond immediately. This was a curve ball I wasn’t prepared to hit.

Finally, I said, “Look, Bitsy, we can’t expect to do this on a risk-free basis. She may

be able to I.D. us later, but for her it will be like trying to identify a couple of

wraiths. And as far as her assuming the reins at the bank is concerned, I don’t think

that would ever happen. Remember, she would have to be approved by Muslim

men. I don’t think they would pass muster on her, not in a month of Islamic holy

days. And anyway, if we do what I’m planning, there probably won’t be any bank

left for her to take over.”

She said, “Well, maybe you’re right. I’m getting into this thing with a

vengeance, maybe too much so. The more I think about our friends that were blown

all to hell in the Brown Center, the madder I get. So I figured, what the hell, why

not do her as well.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 270

I didn’t say anything. Instead, I put my hand on her cheek. She placed her

hand over mine. We sat that way for a long time. I was leaning in to kiss her (I love

to do that, as you may have picked up) when the phone rang. It was Kane.

“Grant and I will be at your place about eleven tomorrow morning. He can

only stay for two hours. I hope that’s enough time.”

“It’ll have to do. See you then.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 271

Chapter Forty-one

Kahlil was surprised that Karim had sent him out for hamburgers from

MacDonald’s.

He laughed about his leader’s choice of fast food over something more

exotic. “Hamburgers? Are you such an American now that you eat burgers?”

Karim said, “Blend, Kahlil, blend. Become a plain American citizen. Do

nothing that is out of the norm. Blend.”

After their meal, Karim took his new protégé to the ferry slip, where they

boarded for a trip to Bald Head Island. It was a brisk, sunny day. A sailboat was

tacking up the Cape Fear River, just in from the sea. The flag atop the ferry’s

superstructure was snapping a staccato beat. Karim said, “What a glorious day to be

alive. If we do our job as we should, there is an excellent chance we will stay alive

for a long time.”

As they rode toward the Bald Head ferry terminal, Karim explained some of

the peculiarities that were the law on the island.

“No gasoline powered vehicles are allowed, which I thought at first was

going to present a problem. But the Americans are an ingenious lot. There is a

company in the state of California that manufactures electric all-terrain vehicles

called Gorillas. They are much more powerful and fast than the golf carts you will

see all over Bald Head. I have ordered six of the Gorillas, and expect delivery in

three days. When we attack, we will be highly mobile. Our heroes of September
THE HOBBY/McDougal 272

11th flew in American jets. We will ride on American ATV’s.” With a laugh, he

said, “There is no end to the American’s spirit of cooperation.”

The entrance to the marina on Bald Head leads directly in from the river,

running inland for about fifty yards between rock walls before the narrow channel

opens into the marina basin. On today’s approach to the entrance the wind was

blowing toward the southwest, in the same direction as the river’s current. The tide

was also going out at the same time. These forces working together made it a

difficult feat of seamanship to get the ferry into the entrance to the marina. Karim

noticed that the captain crabbed the ship much like an airplane pilot would do when

trying to land in a strong crosswind, approaching the entrance almost beam to, and

then at the last moment, turning the bow in and gunning the engines as he

completed the maneuver successfully.

Kahlil said, “Damn, that was close. I wasn’t sure we were going to make it.”

Karim asked, “Have you been on boats before?”

“Only the Staten Island Ferry, and it never bobbed around like this one.”

Emboldened by the friendly manner that Karim was showing, Kahlil asked, “I was

wondering, Boss, if this is your first mission here in the United States?”

Karim looked at him, his face grim and threatening. “That is not for you to

know. You are too curious, Kahlil al-Udhma. You would be well advised to keep

those questions to yourself.”

“I’m sorry, Boss. I won’t make that mistake again.”

“You damn well better not.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 273

The ferry had just entered the main body of the marina and was making a

turn to starboard, heading toward the wooden pilings of the slip.

Karim pointed to ‘Cash Float’. “That’s my boat. When we get off this tub,

we will walk over there.”

As they walked forward on the ferry deck, Karim saluted the captain. He

called up to him, “A nice bit of maneuvering on the entrance.”

The captain waved back. “Thanks. I’ve had plenty of practice.”

Karim said to Kahlil as they walked onto the land, “The captain will

remember me. He will think only friendly thoughts when I begin bringing Gorillas

on his craft.”

They sauntered around the perimeter of the marina basin. Alongside Cash

Float, Karim climbed over the railing and went to the forward hatch. Kahlil

followed, tripping on the railing as he tried to swing himself aboard. Karim shook

his head and then gestured for Number Two to follow him below.

In the main cabin, Kahlil marveled at the luxuriousness of the interior.

“Boss, this is a beautiful boat. I didn’t know they made them this nice.”

“Yes, it is nice. But that’s not why I brought you here. We have plans to

discuss. First, though, I want to know more about you. You haven’t told me much.”

“What do you want to know?”

“Why are you doing this? Are you a dilettante, someone who wants to flirt

with danger, to be associated with big, bad Muslims? Or is it that you hate America,

the place of your birth? And if that is the case, why?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 274

“I detest what America has become, what it stands for. It is an oligarchy, run

by plutocrats who rape the people every day in every way. The only people I see

who are standing against the international hegemony of the United States are those

in the Islamic nations. So I became a Muslim and joined the cause.”

“And you believe Allah is great?”

“Honestly? I don’t know. I didn’t accept that there was a deity before I

became a Muslim, and I’m not sure I do now. But I’m open to the possibility. I

suppose you might say that I am a political Muslim more than a religious one. But I

pray to Allah for enlightenment. I have brought my prayer mat with me. Maybe

illumination will come. ”

“Well, such candor is appreciated, but you had better be careful who you say

those things to. Agnosticism can get you beheaded in some quarters.”

“Thank you for the heads off heads up.”

“You have a sense of humor, too. But also be aware that flippancy is not an

Iranian trait. Another caution.”

“Okay, Boss.”

“What does your family think of your new found allegiance?”

“They are not happy about it. We are estranged. I haven’t spoken to any of

them in over a year.”

“And how did you meet Seyed Mahmood?”

”I was the political vice-president of The Young Islamic Society at the

university. Mahmood came there to speak to our group. He gave me his card and
THE HOBBY/McDougal 275

asked me to call upon him after graduation. I did. He offered me a job as an

interpreter. I accepted it.”

Karim said, “You are not a seasoned veteran of the struggle. In many

respects, you are still a callow youth. Why, then, do you believe Seyed Mahmood

has sent you to be the number two man in this operation? I want an honest answer.”

He looked sternly at Kahlil al-Udhma. “A very honest answer. And if I don’t get it,

your ass will be on the next bus north. You see, I am not a fool. I am fairly certain

why you are here.”

Number Two involuntarily gulped before responding. Even in the cool of

the cabin, sweat broke out on his face. “The truth is…well, the truth is that my

principal duty is to keep an eye on you and report back to Seyed Mahmood all that I

see and hear. Is that honest enough for you?”

Karim laughed out loud. “Yes, my assistant. That is quite honest enough.

And I didn’t even have to mention torture, did I?”

Crestfallen, Kahlil al-Udhma said, “If you want me to leave, I will. I

wouldn’t blame you. But since I have arrived, I have developed an admiration for

you, for the way you get things done. I would like to stay, as a loyal soldier in your

army.”

“Okay, you can stay. But you must not contact Seyed Mahmood without me

listening in. I am the leader of this venture, and no one else. It is my ass on the line,

not his. I have no diplomatic immunity to shield me as he does if things go bad.”

“Absolutely understood.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 276

“I will watch you closely, my Number Two. You have thrown away your

loyalty to America, and now you have dumped your allegiance to Seyed Mahmood.

Your loyalties are mercurial at best.”

Karim knew the answer to this next question before he asked it. “Have you

ever killed anyone?”

“No.”

“How do you know you will be able to do so when the time comes?”

“I just assume that I will. I know it has to be done.”

“We will see about that…when the time comes. And now, sit down. I’ll go

over the attack plans in detail with you. I’m not sure as yet what part you will play,

but there will be something for you. Rely on that.”

Kahlil felt relief flooding in. “Yes, and thanks. I won’t let you down.”

“If you do, it will be the worst day of your young life.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 277

Chapter Forty-two

Don Grant sat down in my temporary living room. Kane had gone into the

kitchen with Bitsy to help with the coffee. The FBI man was glum as he said, “Joe

Waldrip died last night.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.” I didn’t know what else to say. How do you

commiserate about the death of someone who, in all likelihood, would have

someday tried to kill you? In the end, Joe had done what he believed was the right

thing. For that I was grateful. But for little else.

Bitsy and Able Kane returned to the parlor with the coffee. Kane set the tray

on a table by the couch and found a seat. Bitsy sat next to me. I said to Bitsy, “Joe

Waldrip died.” She said the same thing I had said, but with a little more sympathy.

Grant said, “He left you something. I brought it along.” He snapped open his

briefcase and removed a police special .38. “He wanted you to have it.”

I looked at him and smiled. “Are you nuts? I wouldn’t take it on a bet. You

keep it.”

That was just what I didn’t need, a pistol with a history of God knows how

many mob hits. Did Grant know that and think I would be dumb enough to accept

it? Well, now he knew better. He shrugged and put it back in the case. Kane grinned

and winked at me.

Grant said, “Before we get started, I have something for you and Bitsy.” He

handed me a large manila envelope. I opened it and pulled out two photographs,
THE HOBBY/McDougal 278

one of a man in a police uniform and the other an enhanced closeup of his face.

“That’s the Houston bomber.”

I studied the photos carefully. This was the man who murdered over one

hundred innocent people, many of whom were my friends. I felt a visceral hatred

well up inside me. I knew I would not hesitate to send that bastard straight to hell if

I ever had the opportunity. I nodded without saying anything and handed the

photographs to Bitsy. She looked at them carefully, then slid the pictures back into

the envelope.

Grant said, “Okay, Judge, this is your meeting. What have you got?”

“I have a few questions to begin with, before I lay out my plans. First, what

is the Institute for Political and International Studies in Tehran?”

“We believe it is the ministry that oversees most of Iran’s overseas activist

networks. Spies, terrorists, the whole kit and caboodle. It is also the propaganda arm

of the mullahs.”

“Alright, and who is Salim Jarsan?”

Kane looked quizzically at Grant. Grant asked, “Where in the hell did you

get that name?”

I said, “You gave it to me. It’s in Said’s file.”

Grant took in and exhaled a deep breath. “Jarsan is the principal control for

most of Iran’s major players in the U.S. For instance, he supervises Seyed

Mahmood, with whom you are familiar, and in turn, Said.”

“Did you know Jarsan is Ghodsi Said’s brother?”

“Now that you mention it, yes.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 279

“Is she going to be a problem when her husband bites the dust?”

“That’s a possibility, but I don’t believe it’s something to lose sleep over.”

“Not for you, perhaps, but I wouldn’t like her trying to find me.”

“Okay, I get it. We’ll keep an eye on her. Now, what else?”

“Well, when I was in the Banco J. G. de Honduras…”

Grant interrupted me. “You have actually been inside the bank?”

“Yes, I have. It’s a bullshit institution, no more a bank than the corner

Burger King. I have set up Said to be lured away from el banco. And here’s the

beauty part. While he’s away from the office it would be very easy to go in and take

the bank’s records. They would lead you to the parts of the network that Said is

supporting. The bank has only three rooms. A reception area, Said’s office and a

computer room. The guy running the data processing is named Ghadir Al-Sassani.

The receptionist is a ditzy gal named Maizie. I don’t believe she knows what’s

going on, but you can bet Al-Sassani does.”

Grant nodded and said, “Okay. We’ll get back to this in a bit, but first tell

me how you are going to eliminate Said.”

I explained at length how I had baited the trap with a sailing adventure. “I

have told him the Swan is berthed at the West End Marina on Grand Bahama

Island. I plan for him and me to fly to Freeport and rent a car. We’ll drive toward

West End. I’ve been on that road before. It’s lightly traveled. Somewhere along the

way, I’ll pull over, walk him into the brush and pop him.”

“Judge, I can think of about ten different ways for that plan to blow up. For

instance, how are you going to get your Glock into the Bahamas?”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 280

“No sweat. I’ve done it before. They don’t x-ray checked luggage at the

Freeport customs office. The gun will be under the bottom panel in my suitcase.”

“And why do it down there? Wouldn’t it be less difficult to do it somewhere

in New York?”

“Probably, but the danger in that is that almost immediately, thanks to New

York’s finest, Al-Sassani and half the country is going to know what happened. On

the other hand, the Royal Bahamian Police Force will take longer; longer to identify

the deceased and longer to come up with a suspect, namely me. It’s not that they are

inept. To the contrary, they are spot on when it comes to dealing with their domestic

crime. But they don’t have the Bureau’s Integrated Automated Fingerprint

Identification System at their disposal. By the time they figure out who their vic is,

I’ll be long gone. More importantly, Kane here will have had plenty of time to go

into el banco and get the records.”

Grant sat silently, obviously mentally examining from every angle what he

had just heard. Kane sat back, a smile on his face.

Grant said, “So you complete the job, turn around and go back to the

Freeport Airport and fly home. Is that right?”

“Yep. Pretty straightforward. A no frills trip to the Caribbean.”

“And you’ll work with Kane to make sure he has a layout of the bank?”

“Naturally. I have one small stipulation, however. I want a duplicate of the

bank records.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 281

Grant shook his head. “No, Judge, that won’t happen. I told you at the

beginning that you were not a freelancer anymore. I haven’t changed my mind

about that.”

“That was before we became partners; blood brothers as it were. Think

about it. I know more than you ever wanted me to know. For instance, I know who

Joe Waldrip really was. A Chicago mob hit man named Constantine DeMarco.

What we have, Don, between you and me is a good old fashioned Mexican standoff.

It won’t hurt you to give me a copy of those files.”

Grant calmed down a bit. “Look, Judge, I can’t possibly fill you in on the

whole story. At least, not for now. I have the responsibility for a number of ongoing

operations. People are depending on me. Their lives could be in jeopardy if I screw

something up. I can’t let you or anyone else go off on a tangent. I just won’t allow

that to happen.”

“The reason I want a copy is to see if there is anything that will help me on

my remaining assignments. That’s the only reason. I don’t plan to take any

independent action. Just call it research. How can that hurt?”

Grant performed another heavy breathing exercise, then said, “How about

this? I’ll let you see the files, but you take no notes and get no hard copies. What

the hell, Kane is going to see them. You may as well, too.” He shook his head

slowly. “We’ve got a Goddamn mini Freedom of Information request here.”

It was obvious Grant knew he was on shaky ground. The last thing he

needed was a mutiny.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 282

I wasn’t going to push it any further. I smiled and stuck out my hand.

“That’s a deal.”

Kane asked me, “When are you leaving with Said?”

“My plan is to fly down with him next Monday. We’ll take American to

Fort Lauderdale and then Bahamas Air to Freeport. With luck, I’ll be back in New

York the same day.”

Kane said, “What time will your flight land in the Bahamas? I need to know

because his cell phone will be out of range then. I’m sure you don’t want him

receiving any calls from the bank.”

“ETA is one New York time.”

“Then I’ll hit the bank Monday afternoon. I don’t know how long it will

take Mr. Al-Sassani to print out the data, especially if he is trying to do so with a

kneecap wound.”

I said, “Take some duct tape with you. Strap Maizie in a chair. She hasn’t

done anything that deserves being killed.”

Kane looked to Grant for guidance on that one. Grant said, “Yeah. Don’t

harm her unless you have to.”

Kane looked relieved. I knew from his background that assassinations were

not his forte.

Grant looked at us individually, then said, “Are we set here?”

We all nodded in assent.

He said, “Alright, here’s what I’m going to do. Bitsy, when Duncan leaves

for La Guardia Airport, you take a cab to JFK. Take everything with you that you
THE HOBBY/McDougal 283

want to keep. You won’t be coming back here. I’ll have a ticket and a reservation

for you on Delta for LAX. When you get there, check into the Sheraton Universal in

Universal City. Before Monday, I’ll have a courier deliver a whole new set of

identity papers there for you and the Judge. Duncan, same deal for you. When you

are back in Fort Lauderdale, take an American flight to LAX. Stay in the Sheraton

until you are contacted about your next assignment. That should do it. Oh, by the

way, Duncan, where do you want your fee to be sent? To the Royal Bank of the

Caymans?” He laughed as he asked.

“No, just wire it to my bank in Dallas. You have all the info on that.”

He hesitated a moment, then said, “Sure. I’ll take care of it.”

He and Kane got up to leave. Kane said, “I’ll come by tomorrow and we’ll

go over the bank operation. This is going to bust their ass bigtime.”

I smiled, “That’s the spirit, old pal.”

Grant shook my hand and said, “Good work, Judge. And if you thought this

was exciting, wait until you get to California.”

“I’ll be on pins and needles.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 284

Chapter Forty-three

When Kane and Grant had gone, Bitsy and I had a second cup of coffee. She

said, “A lot to think about.”

“Yes. A hell of a lot. I’d like to know what’s happening in the Golden State.

And I wonder if it will involve Les Bladen. Maybe they’re going to offer us bit

parts in his production.”

I knew that if we didn’t report in at the Sheraton Universal, Grant might

renege on my fee. “We’ll have to go out there and stick around until I can verify

that our money has been transferred. Once that has taken place, if we don’t like

what’s going on we can bail. Are you comfortable in going out there by yourself?”

“Not entirely, but I’ll do it. What’s really bothering me right now is

something more immediate. Now that we’ve gotten this close to finishing with

Alfred Said, I’m getting frightened, not for me but for you. This is really starting to

spook me.”

I tried to look confident as I said, “Bitsy, please don’t worry. I’ll nail that

bastard. During the final days and hours of all my previous tasks I’ve been almost

clairvoyant in how I see things are going to take place. By the time he gets his I’ll

be so damned focused that I simply can’t fail. There is a saying in football that the

offense has a big advantage in that the defense doesn’t know for sure what is going

to happen. They know something is going to occur and they still get caught off

guard about half the time. Well, it’s even more true in my line of work…no, make

that endeavor. Sounds better. If the subject doesn’t expect an offensive move, it’s
THE HOBBY/McDougal 285

almost impossible for him to defend. I’m not trying to make light of something

extremely serious, but you really don’t need to be anxious.”

“I’m sorry, Duncan, but I’ll be fretting constantly until I see you in

California. Remember, you did say he might be smarter than you. Can’t help

worrying, Sweetheart.”

That didn’t really settle much, but at least we had said what we both needed

to. I said, “I’m going to call my sailing buddy Mr. Said and get him lined up.”

I dialed the bank and Maizie answered the phone. “Bank offices. How may I

direct your call?”

I said, “Hello, Maizie. This is George Lampson. May I speak to Mr. Said,

please?”

She was much more friendly than the last time we had spoken, which I took

to be a good sign. “Why, yes Mr. Lampson, I’ll get him for you right away.”

Alfred was on the line in a few seconds. “George, nice to hear from you so

soon. Good sailing news, I hope?”

“The best, Alfred. We fly to Grand Bahama Island this coming Monday.

And by the way, I don’t expect my volunteers to spend their own money. I’ve

secured first class tickets for both of us on American Flight 342 out of La Guardia

at nine next Monday morning. Pack for ten days, all casual. Bring boat shoes and

your passport.”

I could hear the excitement in his voice as he said, “That’s wonderful. I will

be there for certain. And thank you for inviting me. I hope that I will do a good job

as a crew member. Will other members of the crew be flying with us?”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 286

I said, “No, they are going down the next day. My wife has already gone.

She’ll be laying supplies aboard. By next Wednesday, we should be at sea. And

don’t worry. I am sure you will give it your all. I’ll see you Monday.”

That evening, Bitsy went on the internet and found the names of everyone

who had died in the Brown Center. She printed out the list and gave it to me.

“When you leave that bastard, tuck this into his shirt pocket. It shouldn’t take long

for someone to figure out why he was killed.”

I took the sheet of paper and folded it carefully. Then I placed it into a

plastic baggie. “In case it gets rained on.”

My conference with Able Kane was set for the next morning. I had asked

him to meet me at the Bryant Park Café, located adjacent to the New York Public

Library. Bryant Park is one of the most beautiful of New York’s small parks. Lots

of trees and benches and a great lawn on which to lie down. The bums love it.

Kane was already there when I arrived. “Hey, Judge, you’re looking sharp.

Is that a new suit?”

“No, is yours?”

“As a matter of fact it is. Unlike you, I can’t take all my goods with me

when I move. So if it’s only the clothes on my back, I want good ones.”

I didn’t ask why he might have to travel light. “That’s too bad for you. And

speaking of moving, are you going to L.A. with us?”

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

“So what’s going on out there?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 287

“If you’re looking for the truth out of me, you will grow a lot older waiting

for it. All I can say is that it is going to be very interesting. You’ll have a ball.”

“I hope so. I’m not having one now.”

“So tell me about the bank. Are you pretty sure there will be only two

people in there when I go in?”

“Like I said before, I’m not certain. My educated guess is that the

receptionist, Maizie, and the D.P guy, Al-Sassani, are the only employees. If there

are any more, they will be in the data processing room where Al-Sassani works.

However, Al-Sassani will be the acting chief honcho in Said’s absence. He will

probably be sitting in the president’s chair, smoking cigars and sipping Iranian

shiraz. Another thing to think about. I’m not sure what volume of paper will be

produced, so you probably ought to take a valise with you to carry it out.”

He nodded. “Sounds like a plan, Judge. Have you drawn a layout for me?”

I gave him an envelope from my pocket. He removed the diagram and

studied it, then tucked it away and asked, “Do you think there will be any cash

laying around in this bank?”

I laughed. “Once a crook, always a crook?”

If he could have blushed, he would have. “Just curious, that’s all.”

“Anything else?”

He said, “Yeah, I’m going in at three p.m. Said’s cell phone will be out of

range, so we won’t have to be concerned about that.” He picked up a menu. “I think

I’ll try the turkey club”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 288

Chapter Forty-four

The Gorillas arrived in large wooden crates. Anticipating the need for a

place to plug in six battery chargers, Karim had previously acquired the services of

a local electrician to install the outlets.

Within a few days, arriving individually on buses, were the prospective

sportsmen who were to speed around Bald Head Island on the Gorillas. They were

Salmak Mehmannavez, Sepehr Taheri, Melurnoosh Hassani, Mohsen Sadoughi and

Ghalandar Taghi. These men, Muslims all, resembled transient agricultural workers,

a fairly common sight in North Carolina.

Their eagerness to serve and their obedience to his orders were enough to

inspire some degree of confidence in Karim.

Salmak had been to Afghanistan before the Americans had arrived. He had

trained with al Qaeda at Tora Bora and had stayed on to kill as many of the

Allahdamned infidel soldiers from the United States as he could. When it was

obvious he and his fellow warriors were outgunned he slipped across the border into

Iran where he was interrogated, feted and shipped back to America.

Sepehr had been a cab driver in Detroit and a loyal member of the Motor

City’s Masjid Qiblah. In fairness, he could have been faulted for his gullibility in

that he believed everything about which Imam Ibrahim al-Hijazi sermonized. By

the time he was offered a chance to go somewhere and do something really bad to

Americans, he was so full of rage he accepted without asking any questions.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 289

Melurnoosh was the ultimate follower. He was a cousin of Sepehr and got

on board when his relative boasted that he would soon be a hero of Islam.

Melurnoosh was a clerk in a bodega and a long way removed from any path that

might lead to great recognition. Becoming a star of Islam was a temptation too huge

to resist.

Mohsen was the only African-American volunteer. A former member of the

Crips, at the age of twenty-four he had joined a radical group of Black Muslims

while staying involuntarily in the Passaic County Jail in New Jersey, awaiting trial.

After being found guilty, he was incarcerated for six years. His crime was having

dared to wound a white man, even though he had previously been given minimum

sentences and on one occasion, probation, for assaulting African-American

members of the Bloods gang with a Tek-9. The infraction that led to his undoing

was one he could have avoided, but chose not to. He was in the six-items-or-less

checkout line at his local supermarket when he noticed that the young Italian-

looking man ahead of him had eighteen items in his shopping cart. He brought the

limit sign to the attention of the violator, who said, “Get fucked, monkey man.”

Mohsen pulled a .22 caliber Saturday night special from his pocket and said, “Did

you ever see a monkey shoot a loud mouthed white motherfucker?” He shot the

man in the side, not fatally but certainly enough to make an impression. Some said

that while they personally have often been tempted to do violence to those assholes

who deliberately disobey the restrictions in checkout lines, they thought Mohsen’s

action was a bit over the top.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 290

Ghalandar was an adventuresome lad who wanted to join the army. Since

the American military appeared to be at war with Islam, he hoped to find an army

that wasn’t. His Imam, a learned man who understood youthful exuberance, sent

him to meet with Seyed Mahmood, who explained how he could best serve Allah

by going to North Carolina.

Karim and Kahlil welcomed these warriors for Allah, showing them their

respective cots in the house in Southport. They had been recruited from the Al-

Mumineen Mosque in Paterson, New Jersey and the Masjid Qiblah in Detroit,

Michigan. With nine days left before T-Day (for Turkey), there was very little time

left in which to train them, particularly when it became evident that only one knew

how to load a Tek-9, much less fire it.

There arose another problem. Only Sepehr knew how to drive.

Karim angrily spoke to Kahlil privately. “I’m mightily pissed off at Seyed

Mahmood for sending me men who don’t possess even the basic qualifications for

this operation. I wonder if the vetting process has consisted of anything other than

making sure they each had a prayer mat.”

Kahlil proved his value to the operation when he said, “I’ll get Sepehr to

spend all his time for the next three days teaching these fighters how to maneuver a

Gorilla. At the same time, Mohsen can train them in the use of the Tek-9.

Apparently, he learned that skill as a member of his local chapter of the Crips,

before he converted to Islam.”

The streets around the small warehouse district where All-Sports

Distribution was located became a test track for the Gorilla trainees. They took to
THE HOBBY/McDougal 291

the task like a bunch of kids on bumper cars at a carnival. By the end of the second

day they had become proficient enough to make it around the complex without

hitting anything. Late afternoons were spent traveling in the van to a remote rural

area in Brunswick County where target practice was held. After the second session,

Karim decided they were proficient enough to be able to point and shoot. He spent

some time stressing the importance of not getting caught in the crossfire. “And

remember, the purpose of your undertaking is to kill as many of the American

bastards as you can in fifteen minutes.”

Only days before T-Day he said a silent prayer to Allah. “Oh great and

glorious Allah, you have sent me on this perilous mission but you have sent me

warriors who barely qualify as such. I pray that you will mold them into firebrands

for Islam…and please hurry up.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 292

Chapter Forty-five

Alfred Said was seated in the waiting area at American Airlines gate seven

when I arrived. He was as excited as a kid going to Disney World. When I

approached him, he stood and embraced me in the manner of Middle Eastern men.

“Thank you again, George, for inviting me on this great adventure. The life of a

banker is not a thrilling one. This break from my rather mundane existence is going

to be very fulfilling.”

Yeah, you asshole, I thought, if being instrumental in the murder of

hundreds, maybe thousands, of your fellow human beings can be called mundane.

I smiled at him as I disentangled from his clinch. “I’m very happy you are

coming along, Alfred.” And that was the truth.

On board, the steward came by for drink orders. I said, “I’ll have a scotch

and soda, two cubes of ice.” I turned to Alfred. “How about you? Or do you follow

strict dietary law?”

He smiled. “Only at home. I’ll have the same as my friend.”

After the steward had moved on, I said, “I hope you were not planning a big

Thanksgiving celebration. We will most likely be at sea on the 25th.”

“No. We have postponed the dinner until I return. My son, Heydar, will

come into town when we have Thanksgiving. He is at Princeton, studying pre-law.

He hopes to specialize in international law. There is a good future in that in New

York, where I hope he will decide to practice. We are especially enthused about his
THE HOBBY/McDougal 293

coming home this time as he is bringing a young lady whom he wants us to meet.

Do you have children, George?”

I lied. “No, I have not been blessed. Your son sounds like a fine young man.

I hope someday I might meet him.”

“Yes, that would be my wish also. So, how did you like the oil business?

And did you ever go to the source, Iran?”

“I was very happy dealing in petroleum. It was extremely good to me

financially. And I met many fine people because of what I did for a living. But no to

your second question. I never went to the Middle East.”

He said, “I was born there, in Iran actually. My parents worked in the field

of archeology. You can imagine the wealth of activity to be found in that discipline

in the Middle East. My father served for many years as the curator of the Museum

of Antiquities in Tehran. I have not been back to Iran since I left as a teenager, but I

can remember the beauty of the country.”

I nodded. “My friends who have been there have all told me how impressed

they were with the country and the people. Maybe some day I’ll go there, but

probably not any time soon. Once I have Winged Edith in New York, I plan to outfit

her for a long voyage, perhaps to the Mediterranean. The thought of sailing to the

Greek Isles, for instance, is an exciting prospect for an old sailor like me. There are

many ports of call I would hope to make in that area.” I looked at him

conspiratorially over my glasses. “Israel is not on the list.” I shouldn’t have said

that, I know, but I was looking for one more confirmation that he was what he was

supposed to be.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 294

He moved his head up and down as he said, “For certain. What decent man

would want to visit the criminal nation that has murdered so many innocents?”

I replied vehemently, “Not me, brother.”

If it sounds as though I had been psyching myself up for the task that lay

ahead, you’re right. To get myself in the correct mode before a job I usually

mentally recount the sins that I am going to cleanse from the scumbag in question.

This son of a bitch facilitated the murder of hundreds of my fellow countrymen. He

would do it again and again unless I killed him first. Believe me, all this helps.

He changed the subject to the matter at hand, the great voyage that lay

ahead. “How will we get from Freeport to West End? Is there a bus that goes

there?”

“Yes, there is, but I don’t like public transportation. I’ve arranged to rent a

car on a no return basis. For a fee, they’ll send someone to West End to retrieve it.

Besides, I thought you might enjoy seeing the sights along the way. There is one

particular spot called Dead Man’s Reef that’s quite interesting. We’ll stop there so

you can see it.”

He grinned and said, “You are most kind. I’m glad I brought my camera.”

We took the shuttle at the airport in Fort Lauderdale from American Airlines

to Bahamas Air. The timing was close but we settled into our places on the

Bahamian plane with ten minutes to spare. I insisted that Alfred take the window

seat so he could see the Island as we approached Freeport. “The waters are

spectacular,” I said.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 295

The customs clearance in Freeport was easy. The Bahamians know the value

of tourism and do nothing to impede its growth. After picking up our luggage at the

carousel, I said to Alfred, “I’m going to the john. Back in a minute.”

In the restroom, I entered a stall with my bag. I opened it and reached under

my packed clothes, grasping the side of the flat bottom. I slipped my fingernail

under the edge and lifted it. Neatly stored there was the Glock. I pulled it out and

nestled it into the ankle holster on my left leg.

When I emerged from the men’s room Alfred decided he should probably

use the facility, too. I said, “While you’re in there I’ll sign up for the car.”

My arrangements had been made with Dollar Rentals. The car was a small

Ford. I remember when Ford’s slogan was “There’s a Ford in your future.” Well,

that would hold true for Alfred Said, even as limited as that future appeared to be.

After tossing our luggage in the car trunk we headed toward West End on

the West Sunrise Highway. We passed the industrial complex at The Bahamas Oil

Refining Company and arriving at the junction with Queen's Highway we took the

road northwest that ran to West End.

The weather was what you would expect in a tropical paradise, warm by

Yankee standards but delightful by any other measure. A few clouds drifted slowly

toward the north on a gentle southerly breeze.

As I drove along, I said, “The wind is out of the south, which is good. I once

entered the Gulf Stream during a norther, and believe me, I’ll never do that again.

The Stream’s current flows north and a contrary wind from the north kicks up some

damned bad wave conditions. Really big ones out there are called elephants. They
THE HOBBY/McDougal 296

ought to call them snakes. They slither at you, building and building until they’re

right on you, and you can hear them hissing out of their foamy mouths and then

wham and the boat shudders and rolls and settles in the trough ‘til the next one

strikes. A situation like that is hard as hell on a boat and doubly hard on the crew. If

the wind isn’t southerly, we won’t go until it is.”

He said, “Why not skirt the Gulf Stream and stay out of it?”

“The Stream adds four or five knots to our speed. I don’t want to lose that.”

Of course, this was all bullshit conversation, meant to screw with his mind

and keep him thinking that I was his true sailing buddy. My Gulf Stream story was

one told to me by Todd Linkenhofer, the man from whom I had bought my Lake

Texoma boat. The snake part was my own embellishment.

About ten miles out of town the landscape became dominated by Caribbean

pine trees and scrub palmetto. We came upon a small marker on which was painted

‘Dead Man’s Reef’ in faded letters. It pointed down a sandy road to the left.

As I turned in I said, “Here’s the place I was telling you about. You don’t

want to miss this. You’ll remember it for the rest of your life, I promise.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 297

Chapter Forty-six

Able Kane tossed his unfinished Marlboro onto the sidewalk as he opened

the street door to Banco J. G. de Honduras, N.A. He wore a leather jacket, zipped to

the chin. He had a black Kangol cap on his head, the brim in the back. His Glock

was in a shoulder holster on the left side and a roll of duct tape was in his inside

pocket. He pulled a small wheeled black piece of luggage behind him. Lifting the

Samsonite, he took the steps two at a time until he reached the top. He tried the door

to the computer room and found it locked. He opened the door to the reception area

and walked in. The woman he assumed was Maizie was reading a copy of People

Magazine, her attention fully vested in Brad Pitt’s alleged ill treatment of Jennifer

Anniston. She looked up at Able Kane with ill disguised annoyance. She looked

more like an Arab than the Bronx babe Travis had said to expect. This didn’t

surprise him since half the women in New York looked like they had just gotten off

the boat.

She asked, “May I help you?”

“Yeah. I want to see Mr. Said. I’m Wilbur. I work in maintenance at his

building and he said he had some work for me and to come by and talk about it so

here I am.”

She replied officiously, “Well, he isn’t here. He’s out of town and he won’t

be back for a week or so.”

“Well fuck me. I come all the way downtown and he ain’t here.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 298

“Puh-leeze, whoever you are. Maybe you better leave and come back some

other time.”

“How about Ghadir? Is he busy? I could talk to him.”

Her eyes cut involuntarily for a split second toward the door to Said’s office.

She said, “He’s much too busy. Like I said, come back next week.”

Kane unzipped his jacket and reached inside with his right hand. He came

out with the Glock. “I’m not coming back. Get off your ass. Let’s go see Ghadir.”

Her eyes widened with fear. “Don’t hurt me. I’ll do whatever you say.”

“Then get up, Maizie, and let’s go in and see the acting president.”

Her voice trembled as she asked, “How do you know my name?”

“Don’t worry about it. I know all about you and this place. Now, get a move

on.”

Maizie stood and opened the door to the inner office. Kane pushed her

through and saw Ghadir at the desk. His back was to them as he sat playing solitaire

on the computer. He turned and saw Kane and the gun. He stood shakily and said,

“What is this? We don’t keep money here. It’s not that kind of bank.”

Kane said, “I know what this bank does, asshole. Come out from behind that

desk. And you, Maizie, sit down in one of these side chairs. Now!”

Kane tossed the roll of tape to Ghadir. “Strap Maizie down in that chair.”

Ghadir said, “Look, man, I don’t know what you think you are doing here,

but you are dealing with something that will get you into very big trouble. Powerful

people own this bank. You should leave now before you really screw up.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 299

Kane’s hand shook slightly as he waved the Glock at Ghadir, indicating he

should move out from the desk. “Get around here, you Jihad motherfucker, and do

as I say. If you think you can perform better with a bullet in your kneecap, then

keep fucking with me.”

The Iranian hesitated only a moment, then reluctantly came around and

began taping his receptionist to the chair. She moaned a plaintiff, “Oh, dear God,

he’s going to kill us.”

Kane said sternly, “I might if you don’t shut up. Put a strip of tape over her

mouth while you’re at it.”

When she was secured, the acting president stood and glared at Able. Kane

said, “Now take me into the computer room. Is anyone else in there?”

“No.”

“Let’s go.”

Across the hall, Ghadir took a set of keys from his pocket and opened the

door. An IBM z800 server was against the wall, with a heavy duty printer cabled to

it. Inside, Kane instructed him to load the printer with continuous paper. “I want a

run of all your open accounts, with six month history on each one.”

It began to dawn on Ghadir that this was not a bank robbery, but actually

could be something much worse. He said, “What do you want this information for?

It would be of no use to you, I’m sure.”

Kane smiled enigmatically. “You know why I want it. I want it to fuck up

your cellular structure, asshole.”

“I can’t do it. I don’t have the pass code to be able to run what you want.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 300

Kane took careful aim and shot Ghadir just above the right knee. It doubled

him over, screaming in pain. “You shot me! In the name of Allah, please don’t do

that again. Oh, it hurts like hell.”

“About that code. Do you happen to recall what it is now?”

“Yes. Please, I will do what you ask. Don’t kill me.”

“Then get busy.”

Holding his knee, he hobbled to the printer and loaded it. He pulled the

keyboard to the edge of the small workstation and entered a series of commands.

The printer clicked, then began chunking out a long stream of information, the

paper folding upon itself in a neat stack. In two minutes, it stopped .

Able Kane walked over to the printer and tore off the report. He picked up

the mound of data and put in his small valise.

Ghadir sniveled, “Now, for God’s sake, will you leave?”

“Not quite yet. I want the file folders on all the individuals or companies this

bank does business with.”

The wounded man, bent slightly to hold his bleeding leg, said, “And then

will you leave?”

“Of course.”

Ghadir hobbled to the other side of the room, moaning loudly. He opened a

file drawer marked ‘Active’. “Help yourself.”

“Go back to the computer where I can keep an eye on you.”

Ghadir did as he was ordered. Kane rifled through the files, then lifted them

out in large handfuls and placed them in the luggage. There were twenty-eight
THE HOBBY/McDougal 301

folders in all. He zipped the top on the bag and put it upright on the floor, with its

handle extended. He went to where his captive stood.

“Turn around.”

When he had done so, Kane shot him in the back of the head. After he fell to

the floor, he shot him twice more in the torso. The violent act he had just

committed, his first murder ever, almost brought him to his knees. He thought he

would vomit right there, but steeled himself.

Pulling the suitcase behind him, he went across the hall into the president’s

office. Maizie stared at him with terrified eyes. He knew he should kill her also, but

he found it was more than he could do. Ghadir had been the first person he had ever

shot, and he wasn’t ready to do it again, at least not to someone who didn’t deserve

it.

He said to her, “Listen to me as if your life depends upon it, because it does.

I’m going to let you go. When the police question you, tell them I wore a mask and

you wouldn’t be able to identify me. If you don’t, if you tell them anything about

me, I will find you and kill you. I know where you live. I know who your family is.

I’ll kill them all. Do you fucking understand me?” The part about his knowledge of

her family was a lie, but he thought if she believed him she would probably do as he

demanded.

She nodded her head in the affirmative. He removed the tape that bound her,

and ripped the piece from her mouth. “Don’t do anything for thirty minutes. Then

call the police and tell them what happened. Tell them I was looking for money, and
THE HOBBY/McDougal 302

that I got mad when there wasn’t any. If you do anything other than what I have just

told you to do, you will be as dead as your friend in the next room is.”

He backed out of the room, picked up the suitcase and took the stairs down

to the street in the same manner as he had on arrival, two at a time. Outside, he

began to tremble uncontrollably. He sat down on the upended luggage. His mouth

was dry and began to fill with saliva. He fought off a rolling wave of nausea, then

stood and grabbed up the bag and scurried down Broad toward the subway station.

When Maizie heard the door below slam, she got up and went across to the

computer room. She took in the disaster at a glance. Ghadir was obviously dead.

The open file drawer told its own story. She went to the receptionist area, locking

the door behind her. Back at her desk she picked up the phone. She hit the speed

dial and waited for an answer. When someone came on the line she said, “Seyed

Mahmood, please. Tell him it is Darya Saleh. I must speak to him at once. It is

urgent.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 303

Chapter Forty-seven

The side road to the shore at Dead Man’s Reef was short, only a quarter

mile. It was used infrequently by locals who went there to swim and fish. There was

indeed a reef there, but no dead man, at least not yet. Thick on both sides with

Caribbean pine trees and low palmetto brush, it was secluded for the most part from

the nearby highway. Just short of the narrow beach, I pulled the car off onto the

shoulder.

“Let’s get out here, Alfred. It’s just a short walk to the spot.”

We both opened our doors and stepped out onto the soft sand. I said, “We

need to go through these trees. It’s only about a hundred yards.”

I took off with Alfred in tow. In a small clearing I stopped and bent over to

retrieve the Glock from its place on my leg. As I withdrew it, I pointed it in his

direction and said, “This is the end of the trail, Alfred Said.”

His face registered puzzlement and then shock. “What is this? What are you

doing? I don’t understand.”

“Sit down, Alfred, and I’ll explain it to you.”

He didn’t move. He was so confused that he was unable to react rationally.

In actuality, in spite of his former protestations to the contrary, he was a soft man,

unused to any rough talk or violent activity. He began to tremble and I said, “Sit

down, damn you. Now!”

Said slumped to the ground, shaking his head in disbelief. “You’re not

George Lampson, are you?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 304

“No, I’m not. And you’re not a simple banker, either.” I took a baggie from

my pocket and unzipped it. I removed the folded sheet of paper it contained. I

handed it to him. He took it with a quivering hand.

I ordered, “Look at it. Do you recognize any of the names there?”

He studied the sheet and finally shook his head in the negative. “No, I don’t

know who these people are.”

“You should, you twisted Muslim son of a bitch. You were instrumental in

the murder of every one of them. They are the people your bomber friend killed at

the Brown Center in Houston.”

His voice was shaking as he said, “I don’t know what you are talking about.

I have no bomber friend. I really am just a banker.”

“Bullshit, Alfred. I’ve seen absolute proof that you were financing the

operation in Texas. The bomber was careless. He left an envelope from the Banco J.

G. de Honduras in his van when he made his escape. Forensics revealed your

fingerprints on it. We also have photos of you and Seyed Mahmood schmoozing on

the steps of a mosque in Brooklyn.”

He sat silently. I asked, “What’s the matter, Alfred, cat got your tongue?”

He asked, “Who are you? Are you F.B.I.? Are you going to arrest me?”

I answered, “If I were going to arrest you, why would I bring you all the

way to the Bahamas to do it? Just to disappoint you about the sailing trip? Would I

be so cruel? The reason we are here, of course, is because it would be easier to kill

you in the Bahamas than some place in the U.S. If I decide to do that. Maybe yes,

maybe no.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 305

That shut him up. He was out of questions because it was becoming obvious

to him what the principal purpose of the trip actually was.

“Tell me the name of the bomber.”

“I can’t. I don’t know it.”

“You sent him thousands of dollars and you don’t even know his fucking

name? You’re lying.”

“I’m not. The network is set up so that no one knows anyone else. Yes, I

send money. That is my job. But I don’t know the true identity of the recipients. I

swear it.”

This made some degree of sense to me. I already knew they had a rule to

operate independently.

“The big question is why do you do these things? What makes you do it? Do

you hate America? Do you hate Jews? Are you a Muslim fanatic? Was your

mommy mean to you when you were a kid? What drives you, Alfred? Tell me the

real reason.”

A long silence. Then, almost ashamedly, he said, “At first, it was the power

I had. And yes, to kill Jews. Then it became the money and the prestige. Now, it’s

mostly for the money.”

I nodded to myself. This I understood. This placed him in the same general

category with all my former hits. He was an ordinary, garden variety murderer.

He said, “I can tell you where I send the money. If I do that will you let me

live?”

I put on a happy face. “Perhaps. Yes, I might do that.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 306

He didn’t hem-haw around. “I have a small notebook in my pocket. If you

allow me to get it, I will write down the names and places.”

“Go ahead.” I didn’t tell him that at the same time he was making his list,

Able Kane was getting the same information at the bank. I wanted Alfred’s listing

just in case, as a backup.

When he was through, he proffered the small sheet of paper to me. I took it

and pointed the Glock at his forehead.

“Is this list totally accurate? Do you swear on the head of Mohammed?”

“Yes, I swear it.”

“Good. Then you will not die…” He breathed a heavy sigh of relief. I

finished my sentence. “…with a lie on your foul lips, you murderous bastard.” I

shot him between the eyes. He began to fall forward and I pushed him back. He fell

on his side. I fired another round, this one in his ear. I picked up the sheet of paper

with the Houston victims’ names and replaced it in the baggie. I pushed it into his

shirt pocket.

I policed my brass and went back to the rental car. On my way back to the

airport, I said out loud to myself, “Crusader one, Islamic fascist zero.” I hummed a

few bars of “Onward Christian Soldiers.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 307

Chapter Forty-eight

Kane called Don Grant when he got off the subway at the 68th Street station.

“I’ve got a bag full of hot stuff. I got a six month computer history on all the cells

being supplied by the bank, plus active files on who the bastards are. There are

twenty-eight of them. The only thing missing is what they might be planning.”

On his end of the connection Grant made the sign of the cross and mouthed

a silent, “Thank you, Jesus.” He asked, “Was there any trouble? How long before

an all points bulletin goes out on you?”

“Don’t worry. I took care of that.”

“How did you take care of that, Able?”

Kane’s voice rose. “I said I took care of it. Now what do you want me to

do?”

Grant paused before answering. He said, “I’m sorry, Able. That was really

great work, but you need to get a grip. You sound like you’re dancing awfully close

to the edge.”

“Yeah, yeah. I know. So what the hell should I do next?”

“Get on the first flight you can and bring that material to me. This may be

the biggest Goddam break we’ve ever had.”

Kane asked, “How about the Judge? Have you heard from him yet?”

“Don’t worry about him. He can take care of himself. Just get here as

quickly as you can.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 308

“Okay. I’ll see you later tonight.” Kane hung up and hailed a cab. He said to

the driver, “La Guardia. American Airlines.”

Grant held the phone absentmindedly, then realized he still had not replaced

it in its cradle. After hanging up, he drummed his fingers on his desk, deep in

thought. Then he tapped the speed dial on his phone.

When the person on the other end of the line answered, he filled him in on

what had transpired. Finally he said, “I’m going to bring in some help to analyze

what we’ve got. Goebbels and his wife are in Toronto, too deeply involved in the

operation up there to get away any time soon. Les Bladen and his crew are only

three days away from dropping the hammer in Los Angeles. I can’t pull them out

now.” He checked his watch. “The Judge should be calling in soon. When he does,

I’m going to divert him to Dallas. This means I’ll have to move Travis up a notch in

the organization. I know that after the meeting in New York, we had decided to

renege on our promise to let Travis see the files, but the situation has changed. I’m

going to have to let him see them. I need help, and I need it fast. After all, three

heads are better than two. And we’ve got to admit, Duncan Travis is smart as hell.”

He listened for a moment, then said, “I understand it’s my ass. I’ll keep you

in the loop.” He hung up

Grant was seized by an almost overwhelming worry that the whole

organization was careening off in a new direction and that he was close to

becoming an engineer on a runaway train. With a heavy sigh, he glanced at the

calendar. He grimaced. He said aloud, “Looks like I’m going to miss another
THE HOBBY/McDougal 309

Thanksgiving at home. No way can we do what we need to do in the next three

days.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 310

Chapter Forty-nine

I called Don Grant’s cell number when I deplaned in Lauderdale. He picked

up on the first ring.

“Deposit my money, Don. It’s over.”

“Difficult?”

“No, I’ve had much worse. I got him to give me a list of recipients of the

bank’s money. I asked for it in case Kane wasn’t successful.”

“That’s good, but Able did extremely well. He has a goldmine of info. He’s

on his way to Dallas as we speak, and I want you to come over as well. Duncan, I

need your help in sifting through what he’s bringing. I’m hoping we’ll be able to

use the intel to bag a bunch of these assholes. As soon as I can, I’m going to turn

our organization in that direction. I’ve already made a reservation for you at the

same Holiday Inn in Richardson where we met before. Kane and I will be there

also. Ask for me when you check in.”

I agreed to the meeting. “I’ll get there as soon as I can.” I hung up and went

to one of the airport bars. I ordered a scotch and let my mild paranoia kick in. If

Grant is on the level, I thought, he is moving me close in to the inner circle, or

whatever their structure calls the leadership. If he is not, then he could be setting me

up. I would be toast, he would be a half million bucks ahead and some other poor

sucker would get recruited. On the other hand, if he is genuinely asking for my

assistance, then I might have a chance to add some really dirty scumbags to my

tally. I’d like that. But I felt like a wary mouse that’s checking out the cheese on a
THE HOBBY/McDougal 311

little wooden platform. If this sounds like vacillation of the highest order, you’re

right. I know what you’re thinking. How can someone who has done all the things I

have done be so wishy-washy? Well, I’m human, just like you. And I’ve avoided a

lot of pitfalls by dithering at the right time. Any more questions?

I finished my drink and called Bitsy. I filled her in on the event in the

Bahamas and the invitation to the meeting in Dallas. “I’ve decided to go. I’ve also

made up my mind to bail out at the first opportunity. Here’s what I want you to do.

Get out of L.A. as fast as you can. Fly to Panama on the first flight you can book.

Go to the Gamboa Rain Forest Lodge. It’s about twenty miles inland from Balboa,

at the confluence of the canal and the Chagres River. It’s a luxury resort, so you’ll

be comfortable there. It’s not one of those tree house hotels. Wait for me there. I’ll

get there as soon as I can. Check in under your real name. I’m not sure if they check

passports or not. In the meantime I’ll clean out our accounts. I love you. Bitsy.”

“Oh, I love you too, Duncan. Please, please be careful.”

“I will. I’ll see you soon. Have fun in Panama.”

“Of course I will. ’Til then.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 312

Chapter Fifty

Disgrace washed over Seyed Mahmood like the effluent from a backed up

septic tank. He paced back and forth in his office at the Iranian U.N. Mission, trying

desperately to put together an acceptable explanation of the disaster at Banco J. G.

de Honduras. When Darya, his inside woman at the bank had called him an hour

ago, his heart had nearly stopped. He had asked, “Where in the hell is Alfred Said?”

She replied, “He has gone on a sailing trip to the Bahamas.”

“At the very same time we are attacked by… whoever the man was. What a

God damned coincidence. Who do you think he was, Darya?”

“I’m guessing CIA. But that’s just a guess. Worse, I tried to call the number

of the man Alfred went with. It’s disconnected. I fear Alfred is in big trouble, if he’s

still alive.”

“Oh, my God, this is a catastrophe. I’m ruined. They have…they have

everything.”

Darya said, “For all the good it’ll do now, I’m going to delete all the

computer files and then get out of here. Before I leave, I will fax to you the latest

contact numbers and e-mail addresses I have for all of our cell leaders, in the event

that your files are not up to date. Good luck with Minister Jarsan.” She

disconnected from Mahmood.

Though Said was never aware she possessed it, she had the combination to

the safe which was hidden behind the Buttersworth painting in the president’s

office. He had been careless about leaving things like that laying about. She opened
THE HOBBY/McDougal 313

the safe and removed the cash it contained. She quickly estimated the total to be

about three hundred thousand. She knew he had been skimming, but it was unusual

for him to let this much accumulate before moving it out of the bank. She smiled as

she thought, perhaps he was planning an unannounced escape from the

domineering Ghodsi. She then removed the Buttersworth painting from its frame.

She used a metal letter opener to remove the tacks holding the artwork to its

stretcher. After rolling the canvas up, she secured it with a couple of rubber bands.

She knew from research that it could bring as much as a quarter million at auction.

She said a quick prayer aloud, “Praise Allah for providing me such a nice severance

package.”

At the Iranian Mission, Mahmood’s secretary knocked on his door and then

entered without waiting to be invited. She laid a fax from the bank on his desk and

waited for instructions. He scribbled a note and handed it to her. “Send this to

everyone on the list. Do it at once.”

She read the message. “Stand down. Cease operations immediately. You

have been compromised. Contact this office in six months. Mahmood.”

“Please close the door as you leave. Oh, and call Ghodsi Said and tell her

that it appears that her husband may not return from his trip to the Bahamas. It

might be appropriate for her to plan a quick visit to Iran. ” When the secretary left,

he opened his desk drawer and removed a revolver. He sensed the oily sharp

metallic taste of the barrel as he placed it in his mouth. It was the last sensation he

would ever feel.

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 314

Chapter Fifty-one

When I arrived, Kane and Grant were already hard at work, trying to

prioritize the files.

Kane stood and shook my hand. “So, how did it go down there, Judge?”

“About the way I expected.” I gave him the details of the job. “And the

capper was that when I forced him to tell me why he was doing what he was doing

he said that in the final analysis, it was for the money. Thousands dead…for the

damned money.” I forced the anger from my voice and asked Kane, “And now, how

did the bank job go?”

He filled me in, omitting nothing. “I suppose I should have taken Maizie out

as well, but to be honest, I didn’t have the stomach for it. I’m convinced Ghadir was

in as deep as Alfred Said. He had to go.”

Grant waved me to take a seat. “Judge, you’ll never catch me second

guessing either one of you. I might have done some things a bit differently, but I

wasn’t there, was I? Right now we’ve got a lot to do and maybe not much time in

which to do it. I understand that bringing you in on this alters our agreement to a

large extent. I’m hoping you’ll assist in this investigation. If you do, then as of now

I’ll consider you a volunteer, and no longer a conscript.”

“And that means exactly what?”

“That you’re free to go any time you wish.”

I stared at the table and the mound of files, rubbing the back of my neck

with my hand. I looked Grant squarely in the eyes. At this point it seemed he was
THE HOBBY/McDougal 315

relying on my patriotism. And I didn’t think he was double dealing. I extended my

hand. He took it and I said, “I’m in. Let’s deal the cards.”

He looked relieved as he began his instructions. “We are looking at each

cell operation with three things in mind. First, what possible target might exist close

to their setup. Second, since money is so important to eventual success, who is

getting the most. And finally, do we have a line on any of the principal actors in the

Bureau files. We are jotting down names that appear in these records. Tomorrow,

I’ll run them through the database at the Bureau. Here’s a stack for you to work

on.”

I said, “Okay, but is it just going to be the three of us? How about calling in

some help?”

Grant leaned back in his chair and clasped his hands behind his head. He

stared at me for a long time before he said, with an almost sheepish shrug, “I’m

afraid our organization is not quite the grandiose group I had hinted that it is.

There’s Les Bladen who really can’t be here, and there are the Goebbels, whom you

met. The Krauts are part-timers and I don’t want them in on this. They’re busy in

Canada anyway. Then there is our financier, and me and Kane. That’s about it.”

I laughed out loud. “Hmm. Some big fucking cabal, Don.” I asked seriously

then, “Which brings up another question. This info is volatile as hell. Why don’t we

turn it over to the Bureau boys and let them pour on the manpower?”

“By the time we got through explaining how we came by all of this, most of

the rats in these files would have slipped down the nearest hole. You can bet your

ass that each of them has been notified that they may have been compromised. And
THE HOBBY/McDougal 316

anyway, I really don’t want to have to make any explanations to the brass at the

Hoover Building. You know why, don’t you.”

“Yeah, you don’t like the idea of spending time at Leavenworth any more

than I do. And they would get their panties all twisted trying to work it by the book.

Well, let’s get to work.”

I thought Grant’s assessment of the data Kane had procured was on the

mark. It was a treasure trove of information that could possibly set the American

Islamic Jihadists back for months, maybe years. As we worked, we were sharing a

road atlas. I made copious notes as I examined my stack of files. None of them

jumped out at me as being a prime candidate. They either had no obvious targets, or

were practically inactive. After a couple of hours had gone by, I was through with

my first pass.

“Sorry, guys. These are probably real assholes, but it doesn’t look to me as

though they are about to pull another 9/11.”

Grant said, “I may have one here. Let me see that map book for a minute.”

He flipped it open to the North Carolina page. “Southport. Where in hell is

Southport?”

He cross indexed the location and examined it closely. He made a sharp

intake of breath as he said, “Oh, my God, it’s about four miles south of a place

designated as the Sunny Point Military Terminal. I’m not sure what that is, but it

doesn’t sound good.”

I asked, “What else?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 317

“Well, for starters, Said has sent them nearly three hundred thousand dollars

in four months. There are also four photocopies of encrypted messages in the jacket.

I can’t tell who sent them or to whom they went. But apparently someone at the

bank wanted to keep copies. One of them has a handwritten note on the bottom. It

says. ‘up country demille hard copy first printing.’”

“I know that reference. Up Country is a Nelson DeMille book. A helluva

good one, I might add.”

Grant said, “Okay, then these messages may be in a book code using Up

Country as the key. Judge, do you still have your copy?”

“Yes, but it wouldn’t help. It’s the paperback.”

“First thing in the morning, we’ll hit the book stores and find the right

edition. In the meantime, let’s see what we can find on the internet about the Sunny

Point Military Terminal.”

Thirty seconds later Grant’s laptop had the story. He said, “Let me read it to

you. The Sunny Point facility is on a 16,000-acre, Army-owned site. The facility is

the key ammunition shipping point on the Atlantic Coast for the Department of

Defense. The Sunny Point installation, located along N.C. Highway 133, was built

with a large undeveloped buffer zone and huge sand berms for safety. It’s the

largest ammunition port in the nation, and the Army's primary east coast deep-

water port. Military Ocean Terminal (MOT), Sunny Point, North Carolina, is the

Department of Defense's key Atlantic Coast ammunition shipping point. It provides

worldwide trans-shipment of DOD ammunition, explosives, and other dangerous

cargo. Sunny Point is the military ocean terminal in North Carolina where
THE HOBBY/McDougal 318

munitions are brought in by truck or train and loaded aboard ships bound for

Europe.

Kane said, “That’s it. But wouldn’t it take a small army to storm that

place?”

I said, “It would appear so. But maybe they have exactly that - - a small

army.”

We each sat quietly, waiting for a brainstorm to hit. It didn’t. Finally, Grant

said, “I’m going to call the pentagon and tell them we’ve picked up some chatter

that indicates there might be an attack at Sunny Point. I’ll recommend they go on

alert status. If they want details, I’ll tell them I’ll have to get back to them. They are

used to a certain degree of obfuscation by Bureau people. In the meantime, let’s get

some shuteye.”

I nodded in agreement. I said to Kane, “In the a.m., I’ll hit Barnes and

Noble. You check out Borders”

Kane looked at Grant. “Can I put the book on my expense account?” Before

Don could jump down his throat, Able laughed quite loudly. So did I. Then so did

Grant. We hooted until tears came to our eyes. I remembered the last time I had

laughed like that. It was somewhere in the la Drang Valley. My squad was laughing

then because incredibly we were still, by God, alive.

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 319

Chapter Fifty-two

On board Cash Flow, Kahlil listened as Karim twice read aloud the e-mail

from Mahmood. His leader ranted loudly, “What in the hell were those fools doing?

T-Day is only three days off. And what does it mean, ‘You have been

compromised?’ How? And by whom?” He slammed his fist against a bulkhead.

Kahlil shrugged. “Why don’t you call them and ask?”

“No, I don’t think so. I say they can go to hell. If they are so chicken hearted

that they would fold their tents at the slightest setback, then I say fuck them.”

Kahlil said, “With all due respect, Boss, that doesn’t make sense. It would

be better to find out what’s going on. If it’s really bad news, we can live to fight

again. If it’s bullshit as you think, then we can move forward. Give Mahmood a

call.”

Karim weighed the advisability of calling New York. Finally, he snapped

open his cell phone and hit the speed dial for the Iranian Mission. “Seyed

Mahmood, please.”

“I’m sorry, but Mr. Mahmood can not come to the phone.”

Karim’s voice became angry. “God damn it, I want to speak to Mahmood

immediately. This is Karim al-Hadji.”

“One moment.” A few seconds later, a man came on the line. “Is this Karim

al-Hadji?”

“Yes. Give me Mahmood.”

“I can’t do that. He’s dead.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 320

A pause. “Dead? How?”

“He apparently shot himself.” Another long, long pause.

The man at the Mission asked, “Did you get his message?”

“Yes”

“Then do as he instructed. Goodbye.” The line clicked off.

Kahlil asked nervously, “What did they say?”

Karim put his hands along side his temples and smoothed his hair back.

“Mahmood has committed suicide. I would interpret that as really bad news. Very

bad indeed.”

“So we bug out?”

Karim asked, “Bug out? That is an idiom I am unfamiliar with. What does it

mean, bug out?”

“Retreat. Get the hell out of here while we can.”

“I realize we are flying in the blind, Kahlil. We don’t know who knows

what. But we are so close to a big success. Can’t you taste it in your mouth, the

sweetness of it, the glory of it? I don’t believe the Americans can get a force

together in time to disrupt the attack. Here’s what I think we should do. I’m going

to contact the Ocean Star. She should be three days south of here. If she has not

been diverted from picking us up, I’m going to proceed.” He cast a stern look at

Kahlil. “Are you with me?”

“Yes, Boss, against all the better judgment I can muster, yes. I’m with you.

And by the way, what shall we tell the men? Do you think we can trust them to stay

if they know the truth?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 321

“They came here thinking they might achieve martyrdom. This doesn’t

change that. They still might be screwing virgins before Thursday’s sunset.

However, I think it might be unwise to tell them everything we know, unless we

absolutely have to.”

“Okay, you’re the boss, Boss. One thing for sure, you had better get our

small army to use their prayer mats as much as possible. I know I’m going to wear

knee holes in mine.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 322

Chapter Fifty-three

I found their last three copies of Up Country within minutes of entering

Barnes and Noble. The checkout clerk commented that I must be a real fan of

Nelson DeMille. I said, “Isn’t everyone?”

On the way out to my rental car, I called Grant who in turn alerted Kane.

My next stop was my bank. I talked with Walter Gottfried, the man I had dealt with

there for the last ten years. The first thing I asked him to check on was the half

million deposit from Grant’s group. That amount had been deposited overnight

from a corporation called Elimination, Incorporated. Not very damned subtle. I

gave Walter specific instructions regarding closing my accounts and converting my

certificates of deposit to cash. I gave him the routing instructions to the bank in the

Caymans. He promised to clean out the accounts before the day was over. He was

the consummate banker and even though he must have been eaten up with curiosity,

he didn’t ask any questions. And I didn’t offer any explanation. By nightfall, a tad

over three million would be on its way.

We were all back in the hotel room by ten-thirty. By eleven-thirty, we had

deciphered enough to realize that something damned bad was about to take place in

two days in North Carolina.

I had ordered coffee from room service. As I poured for the three of us,

Grant slapped closed his copy of the book and said, “I think that Sunny Point is a

red herring, either deliberate or not. I am almost positive they intend to do

something on Bald head Island. I don’t have a clue as to why they picked that place.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 323

I’ve never even heard of it. On the map it’s just across the Cape Fear River from

Southport. Let’s check it out.”

Grant Googled Bald Head Island and a wealth of information came over the

ether. Grant read, “On Thanksgiving Day, Bald Head Island will play host to

several thousand visitors at the the First Annual Bald Head Island Fish Fry

Festival.”

He looked at me with an unspoken question on his face. I looked at Kane the

same way. Kane asked, “Do you have to be bald to go there?”

I couldn’t help grinning as I shook my head. “Able, I had a pal with a sense

of humor like yours when I was in the army. Off the wall about half the time.”

Able asked, “Yeah? What’s he doing now?”

“Nothing. He’s still there. We never found enough of him to ship home.”

“And the moral of the story is?”

“No moral. Just a comment. I always thought that Jack let his good nature

distract him at times when the circumstances were deadly serious. I wouldn’t want

you to change, except that you might be a bit more focused, at least when my

welfare depends on you being on the ball.”

“Good advice, I guess. Not much different from the guidance I used to get

from my mom. Now, you be serious, boy, you hear me? I’m working on not being a

total wise ass.”

“Your mom is the best friend you will ever have, Buddy. It would be a hell

of a good idea if you concentrate on what she told you. And I mean, really think

hard about it.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 324

Kane contemplated his folded hands. He was indeed thinking hard about it.

I knew I had probably come across as slightly chicken shit and domineering,

but I wanted Kane to concentrate. Hard, and a lot.

Grant dragged us back to the subject at hand when he said, “I think you two

ought to go there, and the quicker, the better. I’ll get you into the Wilmington

International Airport on a flight this afternoon. Wilmington is only about forty

miles from Southport. I’ll put you aboard with Air Marshal’s credentials. You’ll be

able to carry a small arsenal on board without any hassle. But this is strictly

voluntary. Do I see any raised hands?”

In spite of the old military maxim that I had always lived by in ‘Nam, never

to volunteer for anything, I raised my hand, as did Kane. He glanced at me and said,

“This doesn’t say much for our I.Q.’s, does it?”

I said, “There you go again. And no, I guess it doesn’t.”

Our meeting was interrupted by the telephone. Grant answered. His usually

serious face took on the hint of a smile. When he hung up he said, “That was a

friend. He just got word that Seyed Mahmood has eaten his gun. You guys have

knocked over a big domino.”

I observed, “My, my, isn’t that too damned bad. Since the Koran forbids

suicide which does not lead to martyrdom, it is fair to assume that Seyed Mahmood

missed the boat to paradise when he pulled the trigger. And now pity his personal

allotment of the virgin population in the after life who must forever get by with no

Mahmood lovin’. For their sake, let’s hope they’re all lesbians.”

Kane said through his laughter, “Judge, now who’s being funny?”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 325

Grant said, single mindedly as usual, “Yeah, good one, Judge, but I’ve got

one last thing. At the airport, I’m going to give each of you a pair of binoculars and

confiscated MAC10 .45 caliber submachine guns with three loaded 32-round

magazines. I don’t know what the terrorists will be packing, but it can’t be any

better than what you will have. And remember, no warning shots. If you find them,

kill them before they know what’s going on.”

Kane smiled again. “Just your style, Judge.”

I answered without a smile. “Don’t get in my way.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 326

Chapter Fifty-four

The Ocean Star was a rusty tub of a freighter of Panamanian registry. She

was owned by World Shipping, a Saudi firm. On her present course she would be

close by Frying Pan Shoals on Thanksgiving Day. Her cargo was edible oils and

cereal grains from Argentina. Her ultimate destination was the Iranian port of

Bandar-e ‘Abbas on the Strait of Hormuz, midway between Pakistan and Kuwait.

This was not Captain Abdul Rashid’s favorite port of call. The harbor was

ill sheltered and quite shallow. When he had to go there it was usually necessary to

offload his cargo onto barges some kilometers out. However, his orders were to go

there this time because of certain passengers who had been ordered to debark there.

They were not on board as yet, but would be soon.

He was operating under a directive from the Institute for Political and

International Studies in Tehran. He knew quite well who those people were and he

was not about to argue with an order from them. His current problem was trying to

explain to his First Mate why they were proceeding at only three knots when they

normally cruised at eleven. Regular speed would put them past the proposed pickup

point in one day instead of two. And if he got there early and had to heave to, it

might attract the attention of the U.S. Coast Guard.

He had nearly thirty years of sea duty, long enough to be attuned to any

sound from the hull that might be a harbinger of trouble. He noticed an almost

imperceptible shudder as the ship pushed through the Atlantic swells, which was

not normal for the Ocean Star. It could be caused by any number of things, but his
THE HOBBY/McDougal 327

years of experience led him to believe one of the screw’s shafts had twisted slightly

out of alignment. If that were the case, it would be a risky and very slow Atlantic

crossing unless they put into Norfolk for repairs. That could be real trouble if the

men he was going to take aboard didn’t like it. Well, he thought, I’ll fuck that camel

when I come to it.

Jorash, his steward, brought him his morning coffee and a radiogram. The

coffee was good, but the message was sour. Proceeding as scheduled. Pickup at 78º

W 33.5º N 1700 Hrs. 25th. Confirm rendezvous.

Captain Rashid frowned. He said to Jorash, “Get off a reply to the sender,

confirming that we will be there on the 25th. And tell him they better be on time,

because I’m not waiting.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 328

Chapter Fifty-five

The flight from Dallas to Wilmington, North Carolina, was uneventful.

Nothing occurred that would call for the services of two intrepid Air Marshals.

We rented a car at the airport and headed south. It was unusually warm and

muggy for late November. We passed field after field of stripped cotton plants, the

occasional missed white boll standing starkly against the brown landscape. As I

drove, Kane said, “I assume you have some sort of a plan for us. How about sharing

it. Or do you want to hear my plan first?”

“Sure. What’s your idea? It couldn’t be worse than the one I’ve been

kicking around in my head.”

“I would like to know what we’re up against before we charge in, guns

blazing. We don’t know where these guys sleep at night, unless it’s at the business

address, which I doubt. We do have the address of All-Sports Distribution. I suggest

we slip in there late tonight and case the place.”

“Great minds in sync. That’s pretty much what I’ve been thinking. I’m not

really good at breaking and entering. Have you had any experience in that area?

He laughed. “Are you kidding, Judge? That’s how I got my juvenile record.

I’m a whiz. Trust me.”

“If you were caught in a B&E. you couldn’t have been too great.”

“I got better. Practice makes perfect. You ought to know that, Judge.”

He had a point.

Kane turned on the car radio. “How about some music?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 329

“Okay. No rap.”

“Did you say no crap?”

“Same difference.”

“Judge, there’s a lot you still don’t know about me. Why would you think I

like rap”?

I hesitated a long time. “All right. You got me. My bad.”

“Sure it is. So you’ll know, I think rap isn’t music. It’s noise, and damned

bad noise at that. Duke Ellington made great music, So did the Beatles and Mozart

and Cole Porter and Gershwin. The point is, don’t misjudge me. Now, or when the

chips are down.”

“I won’t … pal.”

He tuned in a rap station and we both laughed like hell. He settled on oldies

from the fifties.

In Southport, we checked into the Hampton Inn. The clerk gave us a city

map. The hotel’s location was about three miles from our target. We decided to rest

until two in the morning and then move in and check it out.

At two, Kane shook me awake. He said, “I couldn’t sleep. Don’t you ever

worry about anything, Judge? You’ve been snoozing like a baby.”

“Not a baby, Able. Like a man with a clear conscience. And yes, I worry all

the time. Doesn’t do a hell of a lot of good, but I enjoy anxiety so much I can’t give

it up. Just call it a self defense mechanism.”

I put the MAC10’s into a small bag and carried it out to the car. A heavy

dew had soaked the sedan. Kane went back inside the hotel lobby and got the night
THE HOBBY/McDougal 330

clerk to give him a handful of paper towels. When he returned, he wiped off the

windows and the outside rearview mirrors. While he was getting that chore done, I

took out my Swiss pocket knife and dismantled all the interior lights in the Chevy.

There’s nothing more embarrassing than sitting in a spotlight when you are trying to

sneak up on bad guys.

Kane took the wheel. The drive didn’t take long. All-Sports Distribution was

located in an old mixed use neighborhood near the river, with small warehouses

butting up against rundown apartments and a plethora of frame shacks. The only

large structure in the area was a municipal clinic, three blocks away.

A single light on an old crooked neck holder hung above the pedestrian door

at All-Sports. We parked out of the glow of the cone shaped lamp and examined the

building carefully. Fog was swirling through the light, creating an eerie atmosphere

straight out of a film noir.

Kane said, “I’ll slip around back and see if there is any other way into the

place besides the front door. Honk the horn if you see trouble, or if you love Jesus.”

He grabbed his weapon and took off down the near side of the building. I

lost him in the pea soup until three minutes later when he appeared from the right

side of the structure. He moved close to the door and reached into his pocket. He

came out with a handful of large pieces of gravel. He swung his arm back and threw

the stones underhanded at the light. There was a small sputtery flash when it went

out like…well, like a light. I could barely make out his form as he beckoned me to

come on.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 331

I picked up my weapon and joined him outside the pedestrian door. He used

his small pocket flashlight to examine the entrance, shining it between the door and

the jamb all the way around. He clicked off the flash and said in a whisper, “This

place is wired. I don’t believe we can get in without setting off an alarm. One of

three things will probably happen then. A loud alarm may sound. Or a silent alarm

might summon the police. I doubt that will happen because surely these guys don’t

want the cops here under any circumstances. The last possibility and the most

probable is that it will set off an alarm where those assholes are sleeping. If that’s

the case, we’ll have to be in and out of there in one bigass hurry. Or in the

alternative, try and shoot it out with them in the dark. I don’t think that’s a good

idea.”

I retrieved my flashlight from my pocket and said, “Get us in.”

Kane proved his pedigree as a B&E man was genuine. He fished out a steel

jackknife with an assortment of wires, half-keys and lock-picking tools. There were

two locks, one in the knob and a dead bolt just above that. In less than a minute of

jiggling, the door swung open. I could see a small electronic box with a blinking red

light just to the right of the entrance.

Kane said, “Don’t worry about that. It’s already done its work.”

We entered and moved the beams of our lights around the room. The only

things in there were six electric-powered four-wheelers, all plugged into chargers,

and three empty wooden crates. The ATV’s appeared to be new, with bright yellow

paint. On the front of each was a steel box which did not seem to be part of the

original. Welded into place, the attached section had scorched and discolored the
THE HOBBY/McDougal 332

paint job where it attached to the body. A hinged lid topped each cube. I lifted one

and shone my beam inside. There was a Tek-9 machine pistol and a large number of

magazines. Moving to the next machine I repeated the process with the same

results. Kane was working from the other end of the line, performing the same

maneuver,

I looked over at him and said, “They have enough fire power to kill half the

town. But no explosives. Forget about Sunny Point. They would need a mortar or

satchel charges or even a bazooka to blow up an ammo dump. These ATV’s are

murder machines, meant to transport the bastards into a crowd somewhere.”

Able said quickly, “Let’s grab the guns and get the hell out of here.”

“No, that would only tip them off that we’re wise to them. They probably

have more where they’re staying, and if they don’t, they’ll be able to get

replacements overnight from the same place these came from. Let’s high tail it back

to the car and see if someone shows up.”

Kane said, “I think you’re wrong about the guns, but we don’t have time to

argue about it. Let’s get the hell out.”

We exited. Kane shut the door and said, “Hold your light on the locks. I’m

going to pick them back into a locked position. They might think the alarm

malfunctioned.”

“Alright, but for God’s sake, hurry.” He clicked, clicked, clicked until the

door was again secure. “Let’s go.”

We barely made it back to the Chevy before a van pulled into the far end of

the street. It slow-dragged past the warehouse, then drove past us. We had crouched
THE HOBBY/McDougal 333

down to avoid being seen. The truck went a few feet farther, then did a u-turn and

drove back to the building. A figure in dark clothing got out of the van and went to

the pedestrian door. I could see him looking up at the lamp before he took out his

keys and unlocked the door. He went inside and in a few seconds a shaft of light

from the open portal cut its way through the mist.

My nerves were fraying by the minute. It had been years since I had felt real

bowel-moving nervousness, but at that moment I was in the grip of an irrational

dread that was enveloping me. The man in the warehouse was a terrorist who didn’t

give a shit whether he lived or died. He would murder me and Kane and laugh

while he was doing it. And then it hit me. He was no worse than the enemy I had

faced in combat. The feeling that had me in its clutches was the same as that I had

experienced when I was a short-timer in ‘Nam. The closer I had gotten to rotation

day, the more I had feared facing the enemy. Back then, being within walking

distance of the truck that would take me to Da Nang and the blessed plane that

would carry me from evil made my deliverance all the more precious to me. And

this was the same. If I survived this, I would be going home, figuratively and

literally. Well, I thought, by God, I will stay alive and I will see Bitsy again.

Our subject didn’t remain in the warehouse long. I had him sighted in my

binoculars as he appeared again in the doorway, glancing around the area.

I leaned forward as if that would bring his face closer to me. I didn’t need

to. I recognized him almost immediately.

I said under my breath, “Well, I’ll be a son of a bitch. I know who that

bastard is. It’s the Houston bomber.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 334

Kane asked, “Are you sure?”

“I’ve studied that scumbag’s picture a hundred times. I’m positive. It’s

him.”

Kane exclaimed, “Then we’ve hit the fucking jackpot. Let’s pop his ass

right now. So what if we don’t get the other ones. They’re small fish anyway. This

bastard is the King Kong of terrorism.”

My mouth was about to agree, but before the words came out, Karim al-

Hadji said something unintelligible. The back door of the van popped open and five

men jumped out and filed into the building.

I said, “The gang’s all here. Able, old pal, it looks as though this will be

where we make our stand.”

Kane nodded as he said wryly, “Correct me if I’m wrong, but

weren’t those Custer’s last words?”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 335

Chapter Fifty-six

Karim slammed the door as Mohsen, the last man, entered. The leader lifted

his hand and said, “There is bad news. The reason I rousted you out of your

comfortable beds is because I believe someone may have discovered what the

mission is. I don’t have any idea who they are or what they plan to do to try and

stop us. I am afraid we may have lost the element of surprise, which is almost

essential to the success of this operation. I am going to go ahead as we planned with

a minor alteration. We must disperse tonight, with our vehicles. Try to find a place

of concealment if possible. And go separately. In different areas. No one goes with

another.”

Karim held up a badge which he wore around his neck on a plastic cord.

“This is my identification for the Bald Head Island Marina. On it is the name of the

boat docked there on which we will escape after we have completed the operation.

It is called Cash Flow. When we have completed our mission and are all aboard I

will pilot the yacht to a rendezvous with the Ocean Star freighter off the coast at 5

p.m. the day after tomorrow, Allah willing. Tomorrow during the day make your

way to the Bald Head Island ferry boat and make the crossing. Park your vehicles in

designated parking at the marina and come aboard Cash Flow. We will sleep aboard

her tomorrow night and then prepare ourselves for the attack. Do all of you

understand?”

Mohsen Sadoughi lifted his hand. “Yeah, I got it. I’m ready to kill those

motherfuckers. I plan to do five hundred myself.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 336

Kahlil smiled grimly. “Four hundred will do.” He pulled a sheaf of papers

from his pocket. “There are two maps for each of you. One is of this town. The

other is of the island. The Bald Head map shows you where to go to get to the

festival. Study it carefully before you get on the ferry.”

Kane reached across the seat and grasped my shoulder. “Judge, you’ve got a

set of balls. But are you sure you want to do this?”

I answered, “Able, thanks for your concern, but I’m damn sure ready. It

looks like we’re outnumbered six to two. We’ll have to surprise the shit out of them

when they come out. We’re on a slight downhill grade here. Put the car in neutral

and let it roll down until we’re directly across from the warehouse. And let go of

my arm. I’m already married.” The Chevrolet moved infinitesimally at first and

then gathered a little momentum. Fifteen seconds later Kane braked to a stop.

Each of the men opened the weapons box on his vehicle and stored the maps

inside. Karim said, “One final thing. If you feel that Allah has not blessed you today

and you want to go home, tell me now. When we leave this building it will be too

late.”

His eyes went from man to man. Pausing when he came to Melurnoosh, they

stopped. The man was visibly shaking. His mouth was open with unspoken words.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 337

Karim said, “What is it, Melurnoosh Hassani? You want to tell us

something?”

The terrorized terrorist had dreamed of glory, not danger. He started to

shake his head and then blurted out, “Please forgive me, Karim al-Hadji. I have not

the nerve for this. I…cannot do it.”

The other men were stunned. Melurnoosh’s cousin, Sepehr, turned to him

and slapped him hard across the face. He screamed at him, “You cowardly dog, you

are shaming our family. God damn it, you have no honor.”

Karim was outraged. He said, “Melurnoosh, you son of a bitch. This whole

fucking operation is in danger of blowing up in our faces and you pull this craven

bullshit on me.”

His fists were clenched and he breathed hard. If this operation imploded,

Karim al-Hadji was very unlikely to return to Iran to a hero’s welcome. There

would be no parade, no colonelcy, no adulation. He produced a pistol from his

pocket. “Actually, Melurnoosh, leaving is not an option. You have revealed

yourself to be unworthy. I’m sorry.” He aimed the gun at the shaking man. Sepehr

held up his palm. “It’s a matter of family honor, Karim al-Hadji. Give me the

pistol.”

Melurnoosh began to blubber and fell to his knees. “I was wrong. I can do it

after all. Please don’t…” The bullet through his brain put an end to his plea. The

body slumped sideways, his bloody head coming to rest on his cousin’s foot.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 338

We could hear the shot. Kane exclaimed, “What the hell was that?”

I shook my head. “Who knows? Maybe they’re having target practice.”

“A little late in the game for that, I think.”

I said, “Let’s get out and get ready.” I opened my car door and got out,

taking a position behind the hood at the front of the Chevrolet. Kane took a similar

position behind the trunk. I heard him retract the cocking lever on his MAC10. I

repeated the action. I muttered, “Ready on the right.” Able said, “Ready on the left.

Prepare to fire at will…or better yet, at Abdullah.”

Karim addressed the men. “Allah is with us in our fight against the crusader

infidels. Americans will continue to attack the holy people if the infidels are not

brought to their knees. Americans are weak and will beg us to leave them alone if

we are successful here. They have thought that only their great cities would be

assaulted. They had no dream of peaceful villages being destroyed. We will bring

fear to every American. They will beg their president to leave our lands. We, this

small band of freedom fighters, will drown the ambitions of the great Satan in his

own blood. Allah akbar!”

Each of the Muslims responded with their own shout of, “Allah akbar,”

except for Mohsen Sadoughi, who shouted, “Go, motherfucker!”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 339

My right hand was trembling ever so slightly. I laid my left on top of it to

steady it. In my head, staccato echoes of V.C. rifle fire cascaded down a mountain

of memories from across the years and sent a shiver down my spine. I said, “Sounds

like a bunch of Muslim holy rollers in there.”

Kane laughed, “This is North Carolina. That’s the Iranian version of the

rebel yell.”

“Get ready, pal. That door is going to open any minute now.”

Karim ordered, “Get on your ATV’s, you warriors. When I open the door,

leave rapidly and may Allah be with you.”

The leader pulled the chain and the door began to clank open. Light spread

like a carpet unrolling across the driveway. When the bottom of the aluminum door

was high enough for the Gorillas to pass unimpeded, the first one moved out.

“Keep your head down, Able. Here we go!” I fired the MAC10 on full

automatic, sweeping from right to left. Kane opened up on the left side, working

toward the middle. The first man I killed was black, a hulking, fearsome looking

soldier of Allah with a black, long-tailed do rag on his head. One of my rounds

went through his neck and severed his spine, bringing him into a limp pile of rage

on the floor.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 340

Standing with the door chain in his hand, Karim saw his entire army

slaughtered in an instant. Salmak was on the concrete, his arm raised futilely for

help, words frozen in bloody bubbles frothing from his mouth. Sepehr lay

backwards across the rear of his Gorilla as it slowly rolled out into the night.

Mohsen, his Nubian knight, was stone cold dead, as was Ghalandar. And Number

Two, the eager-to-please assistant, shot through the back, was slumped over the

open box on his Gorilla, where he had tried to retrieve his weapon. Karim shook his

head fiercely and leapt to the wall by the pedestrian door, where he killed the light

switch. He opened the single portal and peered into the foggy darkness. He could

barely make out the shape of an automobile directly across the street.

I whispered, “There’s at least one left, the guy who doused the light. He

isn’t going to try and make a break for it on one of the ATV’s, but he will try to get

away in the van.”

Kane said, “I’m going to shoot out the tires.” As he stood to get a good shot,

the terrorist dashed out of the door, firing wildly with his pistol. All the bad luck

Able Kane had avoided in his life caught up to him in that instant. A bullet from the

Muslim’s gun caught him squarely in the chest. Kane dropped his Mac10. “Jesus

God, I’m hit.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 341

Karim ran in a low crouch to the far side of the van and yanked open the

door. He threw himself across into the driver’s seat. He jammed in the key and

turned it. The engine roared to life and he threw the shift lever into reverse, backing

wildly into the street. He crammed it into drive and disappeared into the fog. He

could hear bullets slamming into the rear of the vehicle before he turned the corner

at the end of the street.

I fired at the fleeing van until the MAC10’s magazine was empty, then ran

to my comrade on the wet pavement. He was bleeding profusely, gasping for

breath.

He wheezed, “Go, Judge! Get his ass.”

I learned long ago that enemies are a dime a dozen, but buddies are precious

assets. “I’ll get him later. Count on it. But right now we’re on the way to the

hospital.” I lifted him underneath his armpits and dragged him to the car. I opened

the rear door and pushed him across the rear seat. He wasn’t much help and I was

exhausted from the effort and the adrenalin rush I had just experienced. I pushed his

feet into the car far enough to close the door. Jumping behind the wheel, I started

the engine and gunned it. As my tires screeched, I could hear the wail of police

sirens coming nearer. In seconds we were shrouded from view by the fog. Three

minutes later, I was inside the Southport Municipal Clinic, shouting at the nurse on

duty to come to the car and help me get Kane. A young doctor looked up from the
THE HOBBY/McDougal 342

magazine he was reading and leapt to his feet. The three of us rushed to the car and

carried Kane to a gurney. The doc asked, “What happened?”

“Gun shot. He’s a Federal Air Marshal. We were making an apprehension

that went sour. The perp got the drop on us and shot Able.”

The doctor shouted at a clerk seated at a desk in the corner of the emergency

area. “Call Dr. Slovenik. We need him stat!” Then the two medical people went to

work. The Doc said something about severe thoracic trauma as they ripped Kane’s

shirt open. I didn’t like the look on the medic’s face. I had seen that grimace before

when I carried my platoon leader to a M.A.S.H. unit near Pleiku. Lt. Legler didn’t

make it. I prayed that Able would.

Ten minutes later a heavyset man in a running suit burst through the doors

and went immediately to the screened off portion of the room where Able was. At

the same time, the young doctor came out, peeling bloody latex gloves off. He

shook his head. He looked at me and raised his arms chest high, palms up, and

shrugged slightly. He said softly, “Sorry.”

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 343

Chapter Fifty-seven

Karim al-Hadji pounded the steering wheel of the van in frustration at the

horrible ending to his mission. His actions would make it appear that he was a fool,

and an insubordinate one at that. He should have obeyed the directive from

Mahmood and sent everyone packing. But there had been a chance, albeit a slim

one, that he could have still pulled off stabbing the heart of Middle America. And if

he had succeeded, he would have been able to bask in a brand of glory that would

have brought him to the forefront of the Jihad, not only in Iran, but in the entire

Islamic world.

And now, it was all camel dung. Tomorrow, he would salvage what he

could of the shambles his life had become. He had already closed out the All-Sports

Distribution bank account. There had been a little over forty thousand left. He had

taken the money as a cashier’s check. He decided to head south to Florida and

unload the Carver. He estimated he could get close to two hundred thousand in a

quick sale. With approximately a quarter million dollars he could disappear into the

backwoods of the United States and live comfortably. Perhaps he would buy a small

business.

What he did not want to recognize was the incredible fear that had grabbed

him by the throat during the attack. It had shaken him, it had turned his legs to

gelatin, bringing him to the edge of collapse. And it was still there, sitting like a

gargoyle on his head, whispering, whispering, whispering. He wept, not because of

his failure or due to the death of his comrades, but because he had finally had to
THE HOBBY/McDougal 344

face the test of a warrior and he had not made the grade. When he wanted to shoot

Melurnoosh it had been because he saw himself. And when the enemy had opened

fire at the warehouse, he had stayed away from the doorway. He had not defended

his men. Always before, he had been in control. What in the past had looked like

bravery had always been masterful subterfuge, brazen effrontery. But when he at

last had to face an armed enemy, he cowered like a child. Only he had known that

any bravado he had shown in the past had been there because he had never stared

down the barrel of an enemy’s gun.

He saw an all night restaurant where he occasionally ate breakfast, its neon

red glow shining through the fog. He pulled into the driveway and found a parking

spot in the back, away from the street. The Café was three blocks away from the

ferry slip. He would walk there when the sun came up. He went inside and ordered

what Americans order. Ham and eggs.

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 345

Chapter Fifty-eight

I wasn’t sure what my next move should be, but I knew I had to call Grant

and let him know what had happened.

As I waited for him to come on the line, I tried to find the same sensation of

elation fighting against gloom that I had always felt after action in Vietnam. It

wasn’t there this time. Instead, I was experiencing a great weariness. When Grant

picked up I said, “Don, this is Duncan. We found the bastards and killed them all

except for the ringleader. He got away. I’ll send you an e-mail with all the details,

but right now I’m worn to the bone. It was rough, Don.” My voice cracked as I

continued. “And worse, Kane bought the farm. His body will be at the Brunswick

County morgue. I told them he was an Air Marshal. I’d like someone to pick him up

and send him home, wherever that is.”

“Oh, damn it. He was…he was a hell of a guy. Yeah, sure, I’ll take care of

it.”

“And Don, the one that got away, he’s the son of a bitch you identified in

the Houston bombing as Karim al-Hadji. I got a good look at him just before the

shooting started. There’s no doubt.”

“Well, I’ll be Goddamned. Do you have any idea where he is now, any clue

at all?”

“Just a hunch. I believe he and his fellow Jihadists assholes were going to

launch their terrorist attack at a festival on Bald Head Island. The hotel guy said it’s
THE HOBBY/McDougal 346

a big deal. He’s booked solid for the next three days. He may be headed there. Have

you been able to develop any intel on your end that might help me?”

“Three weeks ago, Alfred Said sent a check for $270,000 to a company in

Charleston, South Carolina. It was to purchase a cruiser for All-Sports Distribution.

You find the boat, and maybe you find him. But listen to me, Judge. If you do

locate his ass, don’t try to get him by yourself. He’s too hot. Call me. In the

meantime, I’m sending Les Bladen to back you up. Do you understand me?”

I hesitated, perhaps too long. He said again, “This is as direct as I can be,

Duncan. Do not, repeat, do not go it alone. If you do and we miss him, it’s going to

be hell to pay.”

I said, with as much restraint as I could muster, “Hell to pay for whom? I’m

already in shit up to my eyeballs. So get off your fucking high horse, Grant. I’ve

been around the block too many times for this kind of bullshit. Let me fill you in.

When Able was lying on the pavement where he was shot and al-Hadji was roaring

off in his van, Able said to me, ‘Leave me. Get his ass.’ Well, I Goddam well

didn’t. I stayed with my man. And now I’m going to do what he wanted me to. I’m

going to get his ass.”

I didn’t wait for any more crap from Grant. I broke the connection and

walked over to the clerk in the E.R. “His name is Able Kane. Send him to the

county morgue. Someone will claim the body soon.”

And then the disillusionment that I knew would inevitably come hit me. I

was tired of the killing, of the war, of monsters who murdered women and children

for some horrid and nebulous thing they called the will of Allah. Centuries of
THE HOBBY/McDougal 347

conflict and still no end in sight. Well, I thought, I have one final personal

resolution to all this and it will come to pass soon.

Outside, the gray mist was beginning to lighten.

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THE HOBBY/McDougal 348

Chapter Fifty-nine

Karim checked the clock above the cashier’s stand. It said 5:40 a.m. He paid

the waitress and left the diner. Back at the van he reached under the seat where he

had stashed his pistol. He tucked it into the rear of the waistband of his trousers,

under his jacket. Patting his wallet to make sure it was still there, he slammed shut

the van door and closed out his life as a terrorist.

The first ferry departure time was 6:00 a.m. Karim bought a ticket and

boarded the vessel. It was a trim craft with a white superstructure and blue hull. The

steel deck was still slippery with the remnants of the night’s fog. He noted that the

name of the boat was Adventure. The ferry was crowded, mostly with people who

worked on the island. He took a standing position by the taffrail on the stern. A man

next to him asked, “Is this your first visit to Bald Head?”

Karim answered, “No. I keep my boat there. I’m going to take her out today.

Fishing. I hear the snapper are running.”

The man said, “Good luck. I’m not much of a fisherman. I prefer hunting,

actually.”

Karim said, “Thank you, but I’m sure luck will be on my side today.” He

moved away toward the bow to avoid further conversation. Halfway across the

Cape Fear River, the last wisps of fog lifted and the red dawn broke across the

water. The island had never looked as good to him as it did then. An hour from now

he would be cutting through the offshore swells, a free man. A sense of euphoria
THE HOBBY/McDougal 349

came over him and he said to himself, Allah, if I knew for sure you were real, I

would offer a prayer of thanks.

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 350

Chapter Sixty

As I walked aboard the ferry, Adventure, I saw him. He noticed me as well,

but I knew who he was and he, of course, had not a clue as to my identity. He took a

place near the stern and leaned on the rail. I pushed my way through the crowd of

early riders and stood next to him. I struck up a friendly conversation. He told me

he was going to go fishing. So was I, though I didn’t tell him that. He needed a

shave, and I noticed some flecks of reddish brown on the sleeve of his khaki jacket.

I assumed they were blood spatters from the soldier who had been closest to him

when we mowed them down.

During our brief dialogue he mentioned that he was going to his boat, which

he kept in the Bald Head Island Marina. That closed another loop for me.

At that point I estimated my chances of killing him were about sixty-forty.

Even though I still had the element of surprise on my side, he was a smart, devious,

vicious son of a bitch. When I made my move, the slightest glitch could reverse

those odds in an instant and Bitsy would be a widow for the second time.

As the ferry boat entered the marina basin I looked over the yachts docked

there. There were a half dozen that looked as though they would be in the correct

price range to qualify as the boat Karim had purchased. I decided to casually stroll

in the same direction he would take when we debarked. From here on in I would be

winging it, a course of action I hated. One thing for sure, I couldn’t pop him out in

the open. That would leave me no exit, unless I wanted to swim back to the

mainland, dodging police boats.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 351

The marina was completely full, every slip taken. This came as no surprise

as I guessed that most were there for the festival. Boaters are usually early risers.

When a sailor moves his boat from one port to another, he almost always opts for

daytime. This is especially true of coastal sailors who like to spend the night in a

marina or safe anchorage. Cruising after dark on a river or in the Intracoastal

Waterway is fraught with peril for any but the most experienced mariners, so

getting up at first light becomes a habit. As I walked along, I saw several boaters

enjoying their morning cup of java on board. One trawler captain was regaling

visitors with sea stories, and getting plenty of laughs. As I passed his vessel, I

noticed he had a large seashell hanging from a leather thong around his neck. He

waved in my direction and then put the shell to his ear and began carrying on a

conversation. After a moment he said, “Hello. Hello. You’re breaking up.” He let

the shell fall to his chest and said, “These damn shell phones. You can never depend

on them.” Laughing uproariously at his own joke he sat down. I grinned and went

on by, thinking how bizarre my life had become that I was laughing at jokes on my

way to killing someone.

Karim turned from the land onto dock ‘C’, where the boats were tied up

alongside in a row and not in slips. Where I stood, there was a low concrete wall,

painted with alternating blue and white stripes. I took a seat on top of it and

watched my quarry make his way to the last craft on the floating dock. It looked

like a Carver, somewhere between forty and fifty feet in length. He swung himself

aboard and went into the pilot house. I heard the diesels rumble to life. It seemed al-

Hadji wasn’t going to waste any time in clearing out. I began to work my way
THE HOBBY/McDougal 352

slowly toward his boat. A morning breeze began to ripple the surface of the basin,

and causing the red, white and blue flag on the stern of Karim’s boat to move in

gentle waves. He exited the cabin and stepped over the side to the dock, where he

unplugged the shore power cable and began to coil it over his arm. I took advantage

of his preoccupation with preparations for getting underway by moving swiftly to

where he was working. I slipped the Glock out of my waistband and held it down at

my side where he couldn’t see it.

I said to him, “Need any help getting off?’

He glanced up at me with a perturbed look. “No thanks, I can handle it by

myself.”

I smiled my most friendly grin, and then pointed the pistol at him.

“Actually, I believe you’re going to need a lot of help, Karim.”

He stood immobile, thinking desperately, I’m sure, about how this could be

happening. Finally, he said, “You’re the man from the warehouse.”

“Yes, it would seem that I am. And you’re the son of a bitch that murdered

dozens of my friends in Houston. You should have quit while you were ahead, you

Islamic piece of shit.”

His voice was quavering. “What are you…what do you want?”

“Lay the cable down and move to the stern.”

We both moved to the end of the Carver where the open deck offered easy

access. I ordered, “Get aboard.”

I followed him as he hopped from the dock to the boat. “Go into the cabin.”

Inside, I said, “Lie on the deck, al-Hadji.”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 353

As he began to crouch, he clutched the small of his back. “My muscles are

sprained. It is very painful to lie down.”

My mouth was forming a strong, “Tough shit,” when he brought a pistol

from behind him. In one fluid move he pointed it directly at me and pulled the

trigger. I have heard that when your number is up, everything slows down and your

sensory perceptions, hearing and sight, are magnified tremendously. I saw his finger

squeezing and it was obvious he would complete the action before I could raise my

Glock and shoot him. A smarmy grin spread across his face. He had the drop on me

and was reveling in it. Doc Holliday probably had that same look when he shot the

hell out of the Clanton gang at the O.K. Corral. My jaw clenched and my ass

puckered as I waited for the round to hit me. Some people find it hard to believe

that it is possible to actually see a bullet flying through the air. I’m not talking about

tracers, but regular, ordinary rounds. I saw them more than once flying out of the

elephant grass in ‘Nam. It might have been because of the way the sun glinted on

the copper jacket. I don’t know. I couldn’t dodge them, but I saw them. I expected

to see a slug fly out of the barrel of Karim’s weapon, on its way to my chest. But I

didn’t. Surreally, there wasn’t a bang from Karim’s weapon. Instead, it gave a loud

click. And then another click and another.

He looked at the pistol and shook his head. The dumb son of a bitch had

forgotten to reload after the shootout at All-Sports Distribution.

I said, “Allah is fucking you over, Karim. Now, drop the weapon and lie

down.”
THE HOBBY/McDougal 354

He obeyed and the gun clattered to the teak deck. When he was flat on his

stomach, I moved around him, feeling for a second weapon. He was clean. I said,

“Get up and sit in that chair at the nav station.”

He did as I directed. “Where do you keep the duct tape?” Every boater in the

known universe has duct tape. He pointed to a large drawer under the couch. I

opened it up and found a roll.

“Put your hands behind your head and swing the chair around so that you

are facing the station.” When he was in position, I got behind him and instructed

him to put his hands in his pockets. I looped a long piece of tape around his torso

and then began taping him securely to the chair.

I know what you must be thinking. I would be nothing without duct tape.

Well, you’re right.

When he was secured to my satisfaction, but certainly not his, I finished

with a strip across his mouth, moustache and all.

I went back on the dock and picked up the shore power cord and threw it on

the aft deck. Next, I slipped the dock lines around the stanchions on the dock and

tied them off on the boat, fore and aft. Back on board, I put the shift lever in reverse

and let it idle, causing the craft to tug gently on the lines. I untied the stern line and

pulled it aboard and walked forward to release the bow line. As it came free, I

brought it in and ran the few steps to the wheel house as the Carver began to move

backwards into the exit channel in the marina basin. I ran up the RPM’s on the

starboard screw which turned the boat toward the channel that led to the Cape Fear

River.
THE HOBBY/McDougal 355

I said over my shoulder to my passenger, “We’re outa here. Ah, a life on the

bounding main. There’s nothing like it.”

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net


THE HOBBY/McDougal 356

Chapter Sixty-one

As we entered the Atlantic and passed the last green buoy I used the Global

Positioning System to set the autopilot on a course south by southwest, with

Charleston, South Carolina, as the destination. I synchronized the engines and set

the speed at twenty knots, and then let the autopilot follow the GPS to the target.

I scanned the horizon and found it clear. The sea had two foot swells, no

whitecaps, which would make for a smooth voyage. I went to the bookshelf above

the nav station and saw a copy of Up Country. I also noticed several books on

seamanship, including Chapman Piloting and Seamanship, the bible for most

mariners. Also there, nestled in the middle of the row was the volume I was looking

for, a copy of the Koran, the bible for most terrorists. I pulled it down and sat on the

couch opposite Karim. It contained a side by side printing of the holy words, with

Arabic on the left of each page and English on the right. I riffled through the leaves,

pausing to read occasional passages. I carried the book over to Karim and showed it

to him. I wanted to ask him some questions and hear if he had any replies, so I

ripped off the tape covering his mouth. He winced as a good portion of the hair on

his upper lip came off with it.

I said, “This is the Koran. Perhaps you can help me, al-Hadji. Can you tell

me where to look for the part that says it is alright to murder little children with

bombs? Even Muslim children?”


THE HOBBY/McDougal 357

He sat silently. “And where might I look to find the part that indicates it is

okay to take innocent people hostage and cut off their heads. I can’t seem to find

that in here either.”

He didn’t open his mouth. It was not stoicism that kept him quiet. He was

still because he knew those exact words weren’t in there.

I threw the Koran in his lap. “The truth is that a handful of fanatical

monsters like you have decided that doing those things will lead to your assuming

greater power. It is really not for Allah, but for lust. The hunger for supremacy that

has overwhelmed decency and morality. And it is assholes like you who prate about

glorifying Allah when it is your own God damned self you are serving.”

He finally asked, “What are you going to do with me?”

I smiled. “That depends. Can you tell me the truth? Can you really say why

you have done the evil things you have done?”

He responded, “I can…yes, I can tell the truth about everything I did. The

cause is bullshit, as you have said. I did it for myself, for the glory I thought might

come to me. Please, mister, please don’t kill me.”

I said, “Karim al-Hadji, I am taking into account your confession and your

plea for clemency. My ruling is that I will accept the first and deny the second. May

your soul burn for eternity and a day in the front row seat in hell you have so richly

earned.”

I pointed the Glock at his chest and fired. He screamed. The next round was

in his sick, warped, malevolent brain.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 358

I am not sure how many of the terrorists in the All-Sports Distribution

warehouse were dead because of me, so I can’t give you an accurate final number

here at the end of my career as an executioner. I am guessing I got two of them, so I

am probably ending up with about twenty-five, including Said. All that was left

now was to tie up the loose ends.

I went back to the wheelhouse and throttled back the engines, pushing the

gear lever into neutral. In the corner of the lounge was a plastic box labeled ‘Rescue

Pod’. I opened it up and found a small inflatable life raft. I carried it out to the aft

deck and pulled the cord that activated the CO2 inflation system. Ten seconds of

hissing and I had a small raft with a built in red canopy. I tied a painter to it and

shoved it off the rear transom. I went back inside and cut the bonds off Karim, and

dragged him to the stern. I pushed him into the raft and went back to the nav station.

I checked the GPS coordinates and jotted them down on a piece of scratch paper. I

went back to the stern and cast off the line that secured the raft to the boat, letting it

drift away.

Back inside, I revved up the engines and headed for Charleston. As I cruised

along, I called Don Grant’s number on my cell phone. When he answered I said,

“It’s all over, pal. Karim al-Hadji is shoveling coal next to Seyed Mahmood as we

speak. I figured you would want his body as proof that the Houston bomber is

kaput, so I set him adrift off the coast of the Carolinas. Here’s the lat-long

coordinates. Send the Coast Guard. The raft he’s on has a bright red canopy.” I gave

him the numbers and then continued my conversation. “I’m resigning from the

organization, Don, and I have a final request. I would like a set of papers for a 2005
THE HOBBY/McDougal 359

Carver 430 cabin cruiser. I’ll be renaming the boat. It will be the Bit-Sea.” I gave

him the hull number. I reminded him that the previous owner was All-Sports

Distribution. “Send the documentation to me, care of the City Marina in Fort

Lauderdale, Florida. I’ll be there in a few days. Can you do that for me?”

“Sure. Consider it done. I hate to see you go, Judge. You have gone above

and beyond the call. And…well, thanks, Judge. I appreciate the hell out of you. By

the way, where are you heading?”

“Where it’s warm, Don. Nice and warm.”

He said, “You take care, okay.” He sounded genuinely sincere. I believe he

was. Except for the letter with the boat’s documents that I picked up in the Sunshine

State, I never heard from him again.

My next call was to Bitsy at the Gamboa Rain Forest Lodge. When she

answered I said, “Hey, Sweetheart, it’s all over. I’ll be there in a week. We’ll be

moving south as soon as I can pick you up.”

She began to cry. “Oh, Duncan, I was so very worried. Thank God you’re

okay. You are okay, aren’t you?”

“Never better. I love you, Bitsy. The best is yet to come.”

And that was a true statement if there ever was one.

Here at the end of this remarkable period in my life, I am reminded of the

beautifully sung words of my favorite songstress, Edith Piaf. Non, je ne regrette

rien, No, I do not regret anything. And I don’t. True to the promise I made to my

bride, I have hung up my gun belt. And O.J., if you’re reading this, this is your

lucky day. You were high on my list.


THE HOBBY/McDougal 360

Bitsy and I would love to have any of you drop by if you’re in our new

neighborhood, but sadly, that won’t be possible since I won’t be telling you where it

is. One thing for sure, though. You’d really like it here. It’s quite nice and warm.

E-mail the author: mcdougal8@verizon.net

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