0% found this document useful (0 votes)
58 views3 pages

Result

The document analyzes rice production data from 1995 to 2015 for four countries. Most countries saw increasing production over time. Countries A and B produced significantly more rice than Countries C and D. Production trends varied between countries but generally increased or followed a rise then decline pattern.

Uploaded by

Minh Khánh
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as DOCX, PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
0% found this document useful (0 votes)
58 views3 pages

Result

The document analyzes rice production data from 1995 to 2015 for four countries. Most countries saw increasing production over time. Countries A and B produced significantly more rice than Countries C and D. Production trends varied between countries but generally increased or followed a rise then decline pattern.

Uploaded by

Minh Khánh
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as DOCX, PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd

The chart below shows the annual rice production in 4 countries in 1995, 2005, 2015.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make
comparisons when necessary.

The graph highlights the production of rice yearly between four nations in a five-year interval,
from 1995 to 2015).

Overall, most countries saw a rise in production throughout the period. It is worth noticing
that A and B’s rice production was considerably higher than that of both C and D.

In 2005, A’s annual rice production stood at exactly 45 million tonnes, then rose gradually,
reaching exactly 50 million tonnes in 2015. D’s production of rice also rose, but not
significantly. Its production remained the same in both 2005 and 2010 ( about 2.5 million
tonnes) and only rose to 5 million tonnes in 2015.

B and C’s production trends followed the same pattern: rose and then dropped. B’ figure
stood at about 25.3 million tonnes in 2005, rocketed to 43 million tonnes then dropped down
to 36 million tonnes. C’s figure had the same trend, with the exception being the production
of rice dropped to the same figure in 2015.

Sửa lỗi ngữ pháp nâng cao


Error: "The graph highlights the production of rice yearly between four nations in a five-year
interval, from 1995 to 2015)." Correction: "The graph highlights the yearly production of rice
among four nations over a five-year interval, from 1995 to 2015." Explanation: The original
sentence is grammatically incorrect due to the placement of the word "yearly" and the use of
"between" instead of "among." "Yearly" should come after "production of rice" to properly
modify it, and "among" is used because more than two nations are involved.

Error: "It is worth noticing that A and B’s rice production was considerably higher than that of
both C and D." Correction: "It is worth noting that the rice production of A and B was
considerably higher than that of both C and D." Explanation: "Noticing" should be replaced
with "noting" for correct grammar. Also, possessive forms like "A and B’s" should be
changed to "A and B" to indicate that the production belongs to them.

Error: "Its production remained the same in both 2005 and 2010 ( about 2.5 million tonnes)
and only rose to 5 million tonnes in 2015." Correction: "Its production remained the same in
both 2005 and 2010 (about 2.5 million tonnes) and only rose to 5 million tonnes in 2015."
Explanation: There should not be a space between the opening parenthesis and the text
inside it for clarity and proper punctuation.

Error: "B’ figure stood at about 25.3 million tonnes in 2005, rocketed to 43 million tonnes
then dropped down to 36 million tonnes." Correction: "B's figure stood at about 25.3 million
tonnes in 2005, rocketed to 43 million tonnes, then dropped down to 36 million tonnes."
Explanation: The apostrophe in "B’" should be corrected to "B's" to indicate possession.
Additionally, a comma is needed after "43 million tonnes" to separate the list of actions in the
sentence.

Error: "C’s figure had the same trend, with the exception being the production of rice
dropped to the same figure in 2015." Correction: "C’s figure had the same trend, with the
exception being that the production of rice dropped to the same figure in 2015."
Explanation: The phrase "the production of rice dropped to the same figure" lacks parallel
structure. Adding "that" before "the production" creates parallelism and clarity in the
sentence.

Task Achievement
[ Band Score: 7.0 Explanation: The essay adequately covers the requirements of the task
by providing a clear overview of the main trends in rice production among the four countries
over the specified years. The key features, such as the rise in production for most countries
and the differences in production levels among the nations, are highlighted and illustrated
with specific data points from the chart. How to improve: To enhance the response and
potentially achieve a higher band score, consider providing more detailed comparisons
between the countries and their production trends. Additionally, ensure that the information
presented is accurately reflected from the chart without any inaccuracies or
inconsistencies. ]

Coherence & Cohesion


Band Score: 6.0

Explanation: The essay presents information in a mostly coherent manner, with a clear
overall progression. It effectively summarises the main features of the chart and makes
comparisons between the countries' rice production. The introduction provides a brief
overview, setting the context for the subsequent analysis. Each paragraph focuses on a
specific country's production trend, providing numerical data for comparison. However, there
are some issues with cohesion, as the transition between paragraphs could be smoother,
and some sentences lack clear connections with preceding or subsequent ideas.
Additionally, the essay could benefit from clearer referencing within and between sentences
to enhance cohesion.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, focus on ensuring a smoother


transition between paragraphs. Use cohesive devices such as transition words and phrases
to connect ideas more effectively. Additionally, make sure each sentence contributes
logically to the overall flow of the essay, and clearly reference data and comparisons to
maintain coherence throughout. Finally, ensure that each paragraph maintains a clear
central topic, avoiding any tangential or unrelated information.

Lexical Resource
Band Score: 7.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary, with some flexibility
and precision. It effectively summarizes the information presented in the graph and makes
comparisons where necessary. There is a variety of vocabulary used, such as "highlights,"
"considerably," "stood at," "rose gradually," "rocketed," and "dropped down," which
contributes to the overall lexical resource of the essay. Additionally, less common lexical
items like "rocketed" and "stood at" are employed, showing some awareness of style and
collocation. However, there are occasional errors in word choice and collocation, such as
"rose gradually" could be replaced with "increased gradually" for smoother expression.
Some minor inaccuracies in word formation and spelling are present, like "then" instead of
"than" in "higher than," but these errors do not significantly impede communication.
How to improve: To improve lexical resource, focus on enhancing precision and accuracy
in word choice and collocation. Proofreading for minor errors in word formation and spelling
can further elevate the clarity and sophistication of the essay. Additionally, varying sentence
structures and employing more diverse vocabulary can enhance the overall lexical richness
of the writing.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy


Band Score: 7.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates a variety of sentence structures, including both


simple and complex forms, such as compound sentences and clauses. There is a good
attempt to use a range of vocabulary and grammar, which contributes to coherence and
cohesion. The majority of sentences are error-free, enhancing clarity and understanding.
However, there are some minor errors in punctuation and sentence structure, which do not
significantly impede communication but could be improved for greater accuracy.

How to improve: To enhance the grammatical range and accuracy further, focus on refining
punctuation usage, particularly regarding commas and apostrophes. Additionally, strive for
greater precision in sentence construction to avoid ambiguity or confusion. Proofreading
carefully for grammatical errors will help achieve a higher band score in this criterion.

Bài chữa tham khảo


The provided chart illustrates the annual rice production across four countries over a twenty-
year period, spanning from 1995 to 2015.

Overall, it is evident that there was a general upward trend in rice production for most
nations throughout the specified timeframe. Notably, Countries A and B exhibited notably
higher levels of rice production compared to Countries C and D.

In 2005, Country A's rice production amounted to precisely 45 million tonnes, which
subsequently experienced a gradual increase, reaching 50 million tonnes by 2015. Similarly,
Country D experienced an increase in rice production, albeit less pronounced. Production
levels remained consistent between 2005 and 2010 at approximately 2.5 million tonnes
before rising to 5 million tonnes by 2015.

Both Countries B and C demonstrated a similar production pattern, characterized by an


initial rise followed by a decline. In 2005, Country B produced around 25.3 million tonnes of
rice, which then surged to 43 million tonnes before declining to 36 million tonnes. Likewise,
Country C experienced a parallel trend, with the exception of production levels dropping to
the same figure by 2015.

You might also like