Katie Cleary 2.6.12 FCS 451 Abstract #1 Goldberg, A. E., Downing, J. B., & Moyer, A. M. (2012).

Why parenthood, and why now? Gay Men's Motivations for Pursuing Parenthood. Family Relations, 61(1), 157-174. doi:10.1111/j.1741-3729.2011.00687.x Why Parenthood, and Why Now? Gay Mens Motivations for Pursuing Parenthood describes a study that focused on reasons that gay men listed for adopting children and becoming parents. Some of these reasons are also commonly listed among heterosexuals reasons for pursuing parenthood and others are unique to homosexual males. It is estimated that while over half of gay men want to become parents and the number of gay parents is increasing, there is still uncertainty about homosexual parenting, with almost half of Americans stating that same-sex couples should not have the right to adopt. Gay couples that wish to become parents are criticized by both heterosexual couples and by other homosexual couples, because becoming a parent is not the norm for a gay couple. Heterosexuals claim that same-sex couples do not make adequate parents, homosexuals claim that gay men wanting to adopt are assimilating to heterosexuality, and gay couples are sometimes faced with suspicion and questioned about their motives to adopt. Because society views women as the primary caregivers of children, it is difficult for them to accept two men raising a child. Many gay couples state lack of support from their own biological families as a reason to adopt and create a family of their own. Gay men are highly interested in adoption because it is one of the only means to creating their own family and because it gives them the opportunity to help a child in need. The timing for becoming parents for a gay couple is influenced by many

factors. The timing of coming out and unique life experiences, such as coming into contact with other gay parents, influence a gay couples decision to become parents. This study interviewed 70 gay men, in 35 couples, who were seeking to adopt and become parents. These males had an average age of 38.4 years, had been in their current relationships for an average of 8.3 years, and were 81% white. There were much smaller percentages of Latino, Asian, biracial and multiracial, and African American males interviewed in this study. They were asked three open-ended questions during their interviews. Researchers wanted to know why they wanted to become parents, why they wanted to become parents at that time, and what the driving force behind their desire to parenthood was. Many of the men answered that they thought parenthood would be psychologically and personally fulfilling. A desire to create family ties came from most interviewees who viewed their own childhood with fondness. Many men answered that they wanted to help a child in need, enjoy the benefits of parenting, their partner wanted children, or they wanted to teach their child tolerance of all life. When asked about the timing of becoming parents, these gay couples listed reasons similar to that of heterosexual couples. Financial stability, age, and the presence of a partner were all reasons for seeking adoption. They also said that finding a neighborhood accepting of gay parents affected the timing of the adoption process. Gay couples are increasingly becoming parents, partly for the same reasons as heterosexual and partly due to unique motivations that apply to gay men. Society, the family of origin, and personal life experiences greatly influence a gay couples desire to seek out parenthood.