Chapter 3

Adapting Your
Words to Your
Readers

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 Chapter Overview

• Adapt your words to readers.

• Use familiar words.
• Prefer short words
• Use slang and popular clichés with caution.
• Use technical terms and acronyms with caution.
• Use concrete, specific words.
• Select words for appropriate usage.
• Prefer active verbs and avoid camouflaged verbs.
• Avoid discriminatory wording.
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 Adapt Your Wording to Your Readers

• Visualize your readers. Consider . . .

– how they think.
– what they know.
– their education level.
– etc.
• Then write for them.

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 Prefer Short, Familiar Words

Long, Unfamiliar Words Short, Familiar Words

Abbreviate  Shorten
Accomplish  Do
Approximately  About
Ascertain  Find out
Commence  Begin
Considerable  Much
Determine  Decide
Detrimental  Harmful
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 Avoid Slang and Popular Clichés

• She really threw me under the bus when she

told the boss I was responsible for the missed
deadline.
• Our company experienced a paradigm shift
after adopting Six Sigma.
• The new branding strategy elevates our
brand.
• Our new writing consultant is a great resource
that we can leverage on our next campaign.

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 Use Technical Language Carefully

Social Security’s technical language found

to be misunderstood by outsiders:
Technical Language Improved Version
Has sufficient quarters of Has worked long enough (under
coverage to acquire an insured Social Security) to become insured.
status.
Survivors’ benefits Family insurance payments
Covered employment A job covered by Social Security
Deceased wage earner Worker who has died
To file a claim To apply for insurance payments
Aged workers Workers past 65
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 Choose the Precise Word

• She (claimed) (maintained) (said) that she was ill.

• He is angry (about) (with) the loss.
• I will try (to) (and) correct the error.
• I differ (with) (from) you on this conclusion.
• If he is late, I will not wait (for) (on) him longer than
ten minutes.
• She has an interest (in) (for) technical writing.

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 Prefer the Concrete to the Abstract

Abstract Concrete
We have found that this technique is Our research shows that 87 percent of
successful. those using this technique are successful.
Your department may hire some Your department may hire three new stock
new employees. clerks.
We will ship your order soon. We will ship the Moss No. 41 desk sets you
ordered October 12 by Arrow Freight on
October 15.
Each of the branch managers will Each of the branch managers will receive a
receive a substantial pay raise. 15 percent pay raise.
This procedure requires a constant low This process requires a constant
temperature. temperature of 10 degrees centigrade.

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 Prefer the Active to the Passive
Passive Active
It is believed that the bill was I believe they padded the bill.
padded.
Your report was read by the The president read your report.
president.
The profit and loss statement is The treasurer prepares the profit and
prepared by the treasurer each loss statement each month.
month.
It is suggested that you clean the We suggest that you clean the
element in warm, soapy water. element in warm, soapy water.
It is desired that every effort be Mr. Wong wants you to bring this
made to have this matter brought to matter to the attention of the
the attention of the manager. manager.

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 Avoid Overuse of Camouflaged Verbs

Camouflaged Verb Strong Verb

make a classification classify

make a computation compute
conduct an exploration explore
provide information inform
engage in negotiation negotiate
make an observation observe
provide representation represent

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 Avoid Discriminatory Wording

• Use gender-neutral words.

• Avoid words that stereotype by
– race.
– nationality.
– sexual orientation.
– age.
• Avoid words that typecast those with
disabilities.
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 Avoid Discriminatory Wording
Sexist Nonsexist
man-made manufactured, of human origin
manpower personnel, workers
congressman representative, member of Congress
businessman business executive, businessperson
mailman letter carrier, mail carrier
policeman police officer
fireman firefighter
cameraman camera operator
waiter/waitress server

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 Eliminate Offending Words

Sexist Nonsexist
We will reimburse any We will reimburse any employee
employee who paid his travel for travel expenses.
expenses. A customer who pays promptly is
If a customer pays promptly, he placed on our preferred list.
is placed on our preferred list. A physician should treat patients
A physician should treat his with respect.
patients with respect.

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 Make the Reference Plural
Sexist Nonsexist
If a customer pays promptly, he is If customers pay promptly, they are
placed on our preferred list. placed on our preferred list.
When an unauthorized employee When unauthorized employees
enters the security area, he is enter the security area, they are
subject to dismissal. subject to dismissal.
A supervisor is not responsible for Supervisors are not responsible for
such losses if he is not negligent. such losses if they are not negligent.
When a customer needs service, it When customers need service, they
is her right to ask for it. have the right to ask for it.

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 Avoid Stereotyping Language

• Race • Age
– a hard-working –golden ager
Mexican –youngster
– an honest Sicilian
• Disability
• Sexual Orientation –deaf and dumb
– A lesbian athlete –crippled
– A gay artist

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