LIVE THE

Values
Home and Family Life Lectures

From
“Ten Christian Values Every Kid Should Know”
by Donna Habenicht
Luke 6:44, 45
“Each tree is recognized
by its own fruit…. The
good man brings good
things out of the good
stored up in his heart….
For out of the overflow of
his heart his mouth
speaks.”
Living the values you want to
teach your children is the
most effective and important
way to get your point across.
As a parent you are always
teaching values, whether
you want to or not. It happens
every day, many times a day,
and in many different ways.
Who you are is more
important than what you
teach. Children are
natural mimics—they act
like their parents in spite
of every attempt to teach
them otherwise.
The value message is
much stronger when both
Mom and Dad live it. Pray a
lot and build your friendship
with Jesus. Make your values
attractive. Stress the
happiness that comes from
living God’s values. Have a
lot of fun times with your
children.
When teaching your
children, husband and
wife should present a
united front. Provide
opportunities for your
children to get acquainted
with other adults who
model Christian values.
WHAT TO DO IF YOU

1
CANNOT LIVE THE VALUES?

Go to the Lord with this

problem. He knows how
to change your
personality weakness
into a strength.
 2
When you’re wrong, admit to
your spouse and children.
Admitting mistakes makes you
a real person trying to deal with
real problems in everyday life.
Your kids and your wife will
respect you more for being
transparent and humble.
If the problem is within your marriage,
then get serious about
communicating with your spouse and
working on the issue or get
professional help. A strong marriage
is more important than superior
parenting skills. Children bask in the
warm glow and security of a couple
3
who truly love each other. Their loving
relationship surrounds the children
with an attractive example of God’s
love and creates an atmosphere of
trust that nurtures the best in a child.
 4
Children also absorb the model
of other important people in
their lives—older siblings,
grandparents, teachers, baby-
sitters. Younger children look up
to their older brothers and
sisters and try desperately to
copy their behavior. It pays off
to spend a lot of time teaching
your oldest child.
MAKE IT CLEAR HOW YOU LIVE
BY EXPLAINING AND POINTING
OUT THE VALUE
Just living your values is not
enough to be absolutely sure
children catch on. The
research on modeling clearly
points out that a model is
more effective if she explains
what she is doing and why.
The handicap of children born in
Adventist homes is they are made
to observe certain patterns of living
such as going to church, praying
before mealtime and bedtime,
asking forgiveness, giving tithes
and offerings and others without
the benefit of an explanation
why such things are done. They
are simply expected to follow and
when
they ask questions, the parents are
horrified.
Without loving and painstaking
effort of the parents to explain
their beliefs, they deprive their
children of a knowledge and
understanding of who God is.
Such knowledge and
understanding will later on expand
as the children will seek God to
whom they are initially attracted.
Then such knowledge and
understanding will be experiential
but it should begin from the lips of
their parents and teachers.
Sometimes living your values
is difficult. But each time you
do what you know is right, your
values get a little stronger.
Living the values becomes a
little easier, and your children
begin to understand that values
are really important. They are
worth the effort because they
are important to Mom and Dad.
WHAT A FAMILY DOES WITH THEIR
TIME GIVES A POWERFUL VALUE
MESSAGES TO THEIR CHILDREN.

Adult-child time is the

core of teaching values.
You have only one
chance to teach your
children—make it good.
NOW.
Come together as a family and
decide how you can have fun
time together and at a regular
schedule. Quality time only
emerges from fairly large
quantities of time together.
You must invest heavily in time
with your child before you will be
rewarded with quality time—the
special moments you will always
remember, the times you teach
values at a deep level.
Because today’s children
know about time pressures,
they also know that time
together is very special.
You are giving them a gift
that no one else can give,
a gift that tells them how
much you love them in a
way that nothing else can.
FAMILY ACTIVITIES
1. Tell your children about a
situation you remember from
childhood that shows the
values your parents lived.

2. Tell your children repeated

sayings and reminders of your
parents.
3. Spend a quiet time with your
spouse when you can talk
about your values from your
own families. Compare lists.
Talk about your differences.
Talk about your shared values.
Decide what are the ten most
important values you want
your family to live by.
4. Share an experience with
your children about values
decision you had to make on
the job, preferably while it is
in process so they can really
feel you thinking it through.
Talk about the
consequences of the
decision.