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Building Relationship

• Healthy Relationships:

• Communicating Effectively with Friends,

Family, and Significant Others

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 Intimate relationships???....

• Intimacy
• Social integration
• Nurturance
• Assistance
• Affirmation

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 Characteristics of intimate relationships

• Behavioral Interdependence

• Need fulfillment

• Emotional attachment

• Emotional availability

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 How Intimate Is a Relationship?

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 Families: The Ties that Bind

• Family of origin comprises the people

present in the household during a
child’s first years of life.

• Nuclear family consists

of parents and their offspring.

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 Establishing Friendship
• What makes a good friendship?
• Enjoyment
• Acceptance
• Respect
• Mutual assistance
• Confiding
• Understanding
• Spontaneity

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 The way to create friendship
• Fascination: paying attention to the other person
at the expense of other activities
• Exclusiveness: giving the love relationship priority
over all others
• Sexual desire: desiring physical intimacy and
wanting to touch, hold, and engage in sexual
activities with each other
• Giving the utmost: providing unlimited support
when the other is in need, sometimes to the point
of extreme sacrifice
• Being a champion or advocate: actively
championing each other’s interests

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 Common Bonds of Friends and Lovers

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 This Thing Called Love
• Two types of love:
• Companionate or
mature
• Passionate or lust
• Triangular Theory of
Love:
• Intimacy
• Passion
• Decision and
commitment

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 How Perception Affects Communication
• Perception is the process by which people
filter and interpret information from the
senses.

• Factors that affect self-perception

• Self-concept
• Self-esteem

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 Improving Your Communication Skills

• Learn appropriate self-disclosure.

• Get to know yourself.
• Become more accepting of yourself.
• Be willing to discuss your sexual history—
with your partner of course.
• Choose a safe context for self-disclosure.

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Copyright © 2010 Pearson Education, Inc.
 Managing Conflict
• Conflict is an emotional state that arises when
the behavior of one person interferes with the
behavior of another.
• -------------------------------------------
• Identify the problem or issues.
• Generate several possible solutions.
• Decide on the best solution.
• Implement the solution.
• Follow up.

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Copyright © 2010 Pearson Education, Inc.
 Gender Issues in Relationships
• Gender Conflict is differences in word choices,
interruption patterns, questioning patterns,
language interpretations and
misinterpretations.

• Understanding gender differences is the first

step toward promoting effective
communication.

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Copyright © 2010 Pearson Education, Inc.
 Troubles Talk: How Men and Women
Respond: Men

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Copyright © 2010 Pearson Education, Inc.
 Troubles Talk: How Men and Women
Respond: Women

Copyright © 2010 Pearson Education, Inc. Figure 5.3b

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 Picking Partners

• Influenced by more than just chemical and

psychological processes

• Proximity

• Similarities

• Reciprocity

• Physical attraction

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Copyright © 2010 Pearson Education, Inc.
 Jealousy in Relationships
• Jealousy is an aversive reaction
• Overdependence on the relationship
• Severity of the threat
• High value on sexual exclusivity
• Low self esteem
• Fear of losing control

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 Committed Relationships
• Marriage
• Monogamy
• Open relationship
• Cohabitation
• Common-law marriage
• Gay and lesbian partnerships

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Copyright © 2010 Pearson Education, Inc.
 Success in Relationships
• Confronting couples issues
• Changing gender roles: Modern society has
very few gender-specific roles.
• Sharing power: Dynamics between men and
women changed as women began enjoying
their own financial success.
• Unmet expectations: Not communicating our
expectations can lead to disappointment and
hurt.

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Copyright © 2010 Pearson Education, Inc.
 When and Why Relationships End
• Factors that influence divorce include:
• Age: Younger couples are more likely to not
succeed.
• Socioeconomic scale: The lower they are
on the SES, the higher the likelihood of
divorce.
• Family history: Those with divorce in the
family have a higher tolerance for divorce.
• Children: Those with children often try to
hang on to an “unhealthy” situation.
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Copyright © 2010 Pearson Education, Inc.
 Elements of Healthy Relationships
• Trust
• Predictability
• Dependability
• Faith
• Behaviour interpretation in the context of the
relationship
• Like your partner
• Sexual intimacy
• Shared and cherished history
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Copyright © 2010 Pearson Education, Inc.