How is a Raven like a

Writing Desk
By: The Mad Hatter
Background:

● An old riddle by Lewis Carroll

● Mad Hatter
● Meant to seem crazy

Other Well Known Quotes:

● “If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is,
because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be.”
-Lewis Carroll, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland
Other Well Known Quotes:

“Time is drowning, Hearts are burning, Heads are rolling, Nothing can save you now,
Tick tock, tick tock;
Creatures talking, Weak are rising, White Queen’s nearing, Nothing can save you now,
Tick tock, tick tock;
Cards are bleeding, Crowns are sweating, Tea is spilling, Nothing can save you now,
Tick tock, tick tock;
Red Queen, here’s your warning, Wonderland’s raging, Alice is coming, Highness, time
is drowning, And nothing can save you now, Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock…”
― Emory R. Frie, Wonderland
The Riddle:

“How is a Raven like a Writing Desk”:

● There are many answers, but the most common

(according to google) are:

○ The answer lies in the quill: both may be penned, but they can never truly be captive. Ravens
and writing desks are both highly intelligent, found in a wide range of habitats, will eat almost
anything and like playing tricks on humans. Because outstanding bills are found on both of
them.
● And
○ Because it can produce a few notes. Particularly if its name is Lewis Carroll.
My Assessment:

“How is a Raven like a Writing Desk”

Well. I like the answer regarding the quill, but the first answer I would
think of is that they both have legs. They also have one other similarity.
Birds aren’t real. In this sense, they do exist, but it is very rare that we see
a bird made of flesh and hollow bones. The government creates these “birds”
which we know are robotic for the following reasons.
Reason 1: Power Lines

Birds are always landing on power lines. Why? The simple answer is, they have
to recharge their batteries. If the wires were broken, and they landed on
them, real birds could die. And occasionally they do. On average, about 180
birds die per year because of high tension wires (power lines). This is out of
430 billion birds throughout the world. This number is statistically incorrect
because the amount of broken telephone poles and severed wires, which is
about 2500 in one section of New Orleans alone after Hurricane Ida.
Reason 2: Death Rates

Death rates for birds are surprisingly low, especially compared to the
amounts of birds that are hit by cars, hunted, or fly into things. The main
things birds die from, are windows (See previous slide). Obviously, this is
because they are trying to spy on us, and (since they are controlled by the
government) fly into the windows because of lack of distance perception from
the cameras. This shows the high probability of birds being controlled by the
government.
Reason 3: Pigeons

No one has ever seen a baby pigeon in person, except for people in positions
of high authority. If you look at the chart on the next slide, you will see
pictures of young pigeons. All of these birds bare a great resemblance to a
different species of bird, one that has been proven to be real. For example,
chickens and ducks. For the first 7 days, a baby pigeon resembles a chicken.
After that, from 7 days to 17 days, it looks exactly like a duck.
Reason 4: Anatomy

Have you ever seen inside a dead bird? No? I haven’t either. Most bird
carcasses are just feathers and an outline of what the bird used to be. This
wouldn’t make sense unless someone came and recollected the machines and
frame of the “bird”. Now, some people might argue that it was eaten by a
coyote or a wolf or a fox or a cat or a vulture or some other animal. This
would be easily supported, but most of a bird’s predators will eat the entire
carcass, including the feathers. Why would they just leave part of the bird
sitting there? No. They would not.
Conclusion

These 4 reasons show why birds aren’t real. It also answers the question
“Why is a Raven like a Writing Desk”, because both are mechanical and built
from some sort of object or series of objects. And also because both have
legs. And also because both have bills. And more importantly, because birds
aren’t real.
Thanks for listening!