ESSAY

PREPARATION
–
The Boy in the
Striped Pyjamas
Your upcoming
assessment
Assessment Five: Weighting 10%
In-class analytical essay on the novel.

CONDITIONS: 1 period in class. 1 page of notes,

size 10 font, in point form with quotes and notes
on representations of people and culture in
historical fiction texts.

Due Term 3, beginning of Week 3

The essay
structure
• Introduction – including thesis statement
that directly addresses the question
• Three body paragraphs – including topic
sentences that work together to support the
thesis statement, evidence that is explained
and elaborated on in terms of its meaning and
significance, and a linking sentence that ties it
all back to the question
• Conclusion – which reinforces your thesis
and provides a concluding statement
Let’s look at a SAMPLE and do some
practice

Sample question: Explain Practice question:

how language devices and Discuss how real places,
narrative conventions have events and / or people have
shaped your response to an been represented in a text
issue in a text you have you have studied.
studied.
I will run through the sample question with you – it is MODELLED
WRITING of the process you need to go through to write your essay.

We will go through the practice question as a class, with some support

(this is called GUIDED WRITING)

At the end of this PPT, you will plan and draft your own response to one
or more essay questions. This is known as INDEPENDENT WRITING.
Step 1: Break down the question.
(This will help to focus your attention when it comes to annotating the texts… it lets you
know what you are looking for).
One way of doing this is through HUCS:
H Highlight the command word in the question what is it asking you to do?
U  Underline the concepts and conditions.
C Circle the critical term.
S   Structure your answer – make a plan
For the sample question, that will look like this:

Explain how language devices and narrative conventions have shaped your
response to an issue in a text you have studied.
 H Highlight the command word in the question what is it asking you to do?

U  Underline the concepts and conditions.

C Circle the critical term.

S   Structure your answer – make a plan

Now you need to break down the practice question below using HUCS:

Discuss how real places, events and / or people have been represented in a
text you have studied.
 Now we need to create a thesis statement. A thesis statement is your answer
to the question in a nutshell; your essay provides the supporting evidence.

Sample question: Explain how language devices and narrative conventions have shaped your
response to an issue in a text you have studied.

Language Devices and Your Response (You need to An Issue

Narrative Conventions
• Repetition
• Language patterns
• Characterisation
• Omission
• Narrative point of view 3rd
person omniscient /
Bruno’s naïve perspective
• Allegory
• Symbolism
use 1st person)
• Problematic empathy • Social conditioning into
towards the Nazis – the unquestioning obedience
novel has been repeatedly towards authority
(and justly) criticized for
this.
 Turn the information in the table on the previous slide into a thesis statement. (Note
your thesis statement can be more than one sentence, and you don’t have to name
every single technique or convention that you will discuss).

Sample question: Explain how language devices and narrative conventions have
shaped your response to an issue in a text you have studied.

Your Thesis: The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas (2006) by John Boyne uses narrative point of view, language
patterns and characterisation to construct the protagonist Bruno as an allegorical version of the German
people as naïve and self-centred. This shapes my response as one of problematic empathy towards the
Nazis and the issue of childhood social conditioning influencing them into unquestioning obedience
towards authority.
 Now we need to create a thesis statement. A thesis statement is your answer
to the question in a nutshell; your essay provides the supporting evidence.

Practice question: Discuss how real places, events and / or people have been
represented in a text you have studied.

Real Places, Events AND / OR Techniques and Conventions Representation

People Used to Create Representation
(this is the ‘how’ part of the
question)
 Now write your own thesis statement:

Practice question: Discuss how real places, events and / or people have
been represented in a text you have studied.

Your Thesis:
 Now we are going to plan a response to the
sample question…
In your plan, you should try to come up with a thesis statement and ideas for your three body paragraphs – these ideas will
become the basis for your topic sentences
The thesis statement is your overall interpretation or take on your chosen question – you should be able to support what you state in
the thesis with three clear supporting ideas
Sample question: Explain how language devices and narrative conventions have shaped your response to an issue in a text you
have studied.

• Thesis: The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas (2006) by John Boyne uses narrative point of view, language patterns and
characterisation to construct the protagonist Bruno as an allegorical version of the German people as naïve and self-
centred. This shapes my response as one of problematic empathy towards the Nazis and the issue of childhood social
conditioning influencing them into unquestioning obedience towards authority.
• Idea for BP1: Inequitable application of rules– Bruno is subjected to many rules throughout the entire novel but they do not
apply to his father; this conditions Bruno to not only follow rules blindly but to accept that some people are above the rules
that govern everyone else.
• Idea for BP2: Parallel construction of Bruno’s Father and Hitler – just as Bruno has been conditioned, it is also suggested that
Father has been conditioned in a similar way, and just as he is above the rules that apply to everyone else, so too is Hitler.
• Idea for BP3: naive perspective of Bruno and privileged class position prevents him from realising what is going on around him –
there is ample evidence all around Bruno of the Holocaust, yet he focuses only on his own suffering because of his social
conditioning and the way he views the rest of the world (including Shmuel) through his own lens of class privilege.
Your turn – plan a response to the practice
question
Practice question: Discuss how real places, events and / or people have been
represented in a text you have studied.

In planning a response to this question, you will need to consider which real places,
events or people have been represented in the novel, and how these representations
have been constructed.
• For places, you might consider: Berlin; Poland; Auschwitz.
• For people, you might consider Hitler or Ava Braun (all other characters are fictional)
• For events, you might consider WWII or the Holocaust.
Note this questions says AND / OR – this means you can cover all 3 (people, places,
events) or you can focus on just one or two of them.
 Practice question: Discuss how real places, events and / or people have been represented in a text you have studied.
Thesis:

Idea BP1

Idea BP2

Idea BP3
Now we are going to
examine the essay
structure used by the
English Department at
Rossmoyne…
 SUGGESTED introduction for the sample
question
Sample question: Explain how language devices and narrative conventions have shaped your
response to an issue in a text you have studied.
Global The Holocaust is one of the darkest blights upon the history of humanity. The systematic slaughter of 6
million Jews in Nazi death camps whilst an entire population looked on and claimed to know nothing
about it has prompted decades of soul-searching to try and find the answer to the question: how could
this have happened? But in our bid for answers, we have to respect the suffering of the victims of the
Holocaust, and ensure a search for answers does not become sympathy for the Nazis.
Text Summary John Boyne’s 2006 novel The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas is an allegorical text loosely based in
historical facts but is largely a fictional account of a Nazi commandant who takes his young family
to Auschwitz as he oversees the extermination of millions of Jews. In an unlikely scenario, his nine
year old son Bruno befriends a Jewish boy at the camp, and in a bid to ‘explore’ his surroundings,
Bruno is lured to his untimely death in a gas chamber, the death of two innocent children
demonstrating how both sides lose their innocence.
Specific Thesis The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas (2006) by John Boyne uses narrative point of view, language
patterns and characterisation to construct the protagonist Bruno as an allegorical version of
the German people as naïve and self-centred. This shapes my response as one of problematic
empathy towards the Nazis and the issue of childhood social conditioning influencing them
into unquestioning obedience towards authority.
 Your turn – write an introduction for the
practice question
Practice question: Discuss how real places, events and / or people have been
represented in a text you have studied.
Global

Text Summary

Specific Thesis
Body paragraphs
– structure
The new ‘TEEL’
‘TEEL’ is a good reminder of what goes
into a body paragraph (i.e. topic
sentence, evidence,
explanation/elaboration, linking
sentence) but it’s important to
remember that the evidence and
explanation/elaboration are much more
than just a sentence each
(it really should be TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEL)
Topic
sentences
The first sentence of each body paragraph
is the ‘topic sentence’
They should be a clear statement that
explains an idea that this paragraph will be
focusing on, in relation to the question you
have chosen for your essay
They should clearly support the thesis
statement in your introduction
Ideally, the three topic sentences will build
on each other to form a cohesive overall
interpretation that works to support the
thesis statement
 SAMPLE TOPIC
SENTENCES
Sample question: Explain how language devices and narrative conventions have shaped your response to an issue in a
text you have studied.

Thesis: The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas (2006) by John Boyne uses narrative point of view, language patterns and
characterisation to construct the protagonist Bruno as an allegorical version of the German people as naïve and self-centred.
This shapes my response as one of problematic empathy towards the Nazis and the issue of childhood social conditioning
influencing them into unquestioning obedience towards authority.
Ideas for BPs from plan: Topic sentences:
BP1: Inequitable application of rules– Bruno is subjected to many Social conditioning in childhood is a key issue in the novel that
rules throughout the entire novel but they do not apply to his evokes sympathy for the Nazis as Bruno is repeatedly subjected to
father; this conditions Bruno to not only follow rules blindly but multiple rules that he is not allowed to question.
to accept that some people are above the rules that govern
everyone else.
BP2: Parallel construction of Bruno’s Father and Hitler – just as The parallels between Father and Hitler both being ‘above the
Bruno has been conditioned, it is also suggested that Father has rules’ draws attention to social conditioning in childhood as a key
been conditioned in a similar way, and just as he is above the issue in shaping the passive acceptance of the horrors of the
rules that apply to everyone else, so too is Hitler. Holocaust.

BP3: naive perspective of Bruno and privileged class position
prevents him from realising what is going on around him – there is
ample evidence all around Bruno of the Holocaust, yet he
focuses only on his own suffering because of his social
conditioning and the way he views the rest of the world
(including Shmuel) through his own lens of class privilege.
Bruno’s naïve perspective and privileged class position as the son
of a powerful Nazi demonstrates the issue of social conditioning
in a way that is designed to elicit sympathy for the Nazis as they
can only view the world through a lens of their own suffering.
However, I reject this as simplistic and devaluing personal
responsibility.
 Your turn – TRANSFORM these ideas for the ‘Practice question’ into topic sentences

Practice question: Discuss how real places, events and / or people have been represented in a text you have studied.
Thesis:

Ideas for BPs from plan: Topic sentences:

EVIDENCE,
ELABORATION,
LINK
• Once the topic sentences are done, you need to bring in
your evidence
• Evidence can include: examples, quotes, language
devices, structural devices etc.
• For every piece of evidence you include, you explain its
relevance and significance in supporting the idea in the
topic sentence
• Keep doing this until you’ve used all the evidence you
want to use
• At the end of the paragraph, link back to the question:
Therefore, Thus, Clearly, Hence, So…
 Sample Plan Body Paragraph #1:

Ideas Topic Sentences Evidence

  Inequitable application .Socialconditioning in •  language pattern and capitalisation – ‘Out of Bounds at

of rules– Bruno is childhood is a key issue All Times and No Exceptions’
in the novel that evokes
subjected to many rules sympathy for the Nazis • Dialogue ‘…interrupt your mother when she’s talking’
throughout the entire as Bruno is repeatedly • Bruno’s interior monologue is constantly focused on
novel but they do not subjected to multiple rules and his fears of breaking them and causing
apply to his father; this rules that he is not
allowed to question. ‘chaos’ as ‘his voice [came] dangerously close to
conditions Bruno to not shouting, which was not allowed indoors.’
only follow rules blindly - the ‘ground rules’ that his father seeks to apply
but to accept that some
people are above the • ‘…none of the rules of normal family life ever applied
rules that govern to him’
everyone else.

Linking Sentence: The issue of social conditioning impacting on our behaviour as adults is presented
through repeated language patterns designed to elicit sympathy, but as I choose to resist the text, it
just leaves me with a defiant response towards the excuses being made
 SUGGESTED body paragraph 1 for the sample question
Sample question: Explain how language devices and narrative conventions have shaped your response to an issue in a
text you have studied.
Thesis: The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas (2006) by John Boyne uses narrative point of view, language patterns and characterisation to
construct the protagonist Bruno as an allegorical version of the German people as naïve and self-centred. This shapes my response as
one of problematic empathy towards the Nazis and the issue of childhood social conditioning influencing them into unquestioning
obedience towards authority.
Topic sentence – evidence – explanation/elaboration – linking sentence
BP1:Social conditioning in childhood is a key issue in the novel that evokes sympathy for the Nazis as Bruno is repeatedly subjected to
multiple rules that he is not allowed to question. Bruno is subjected to a bewildering motif of rules, demonstrated through the
language patterns that recur throughout the novel, for instance his father’s office is referred to as ‘Out of Bounds At All Times and No
Exceptions,’ the capitalization demonstrating its importance and how much it has been drummed into Bruno. Dialogue also reveals
rules around how he is to behave, as his mother in a commanding tone tells Bruno not to ‘…interrupt your mother when she’s talking’
and even Bruno’s interior monologue is constantly focused on rules and his fears of breaking them and causing ‘chaos’ as ‘his voice
[came] dangerously close to shouting, which was not allowed indoors.’ Bruno has thoroughly internalized the multitude of rules, even
the ‘ground rules’ that his father seeks to apply to him when Hitler comes to visit, and Bruno is painfully aware that ‘…none of the
rules of normal family life ever applied to him’, the connotations of ‘normal family life’ suggesting that his father carries a superhuman
status or power that allows him to act as he wishes. This conditions Bruno into not only following rules in order to avoid ‘chaos’ but
also shows he is being indoctrinated into misogyny as his mother refers to his father as ‘some people’ and doesn’t dare to voice her
opinions against him, but also he is being conditioned into accepting inequality as natural and normal. This potentially lays the
groundwork for future Anti-Semitism and heinous actions like the Holocaust and the rise of men like Hitler (or Bruno’s father) into an
unquestioning and absolute power as the populace merely want to avoid ‘chaos’ and hence conform to the most heinous of ‘norms’.
This is meant to elicit sympathy for the Nazis, to humanize them, to demonstrate how any of us might end up in this kind of position, in
the right circumstances, with similar social conditioning, suggesting that following authority blindly is something we are all conditioned
to do… and yet, at some point, we have to take responsibility for our actions. Bruno chooses not to follow some of the rules in the
house and beyond – he flagrantly breaks the rules about exploration – he is not a puppet for his social conditioning to control. And so
my response is one of understanding what Boyne is trying to establish in the novel, but at the same time rejecting the idea as overly
simplistic and to some extent excusing the German people from being complicit in the events surrounding the Holocaust. The issue of
social conditioning impacting on our behaviour as adults is presented through repeated language patterns designed to elicit sympathy,
but as I choose to resist the text, it just leaves me with a defiant response towards the excuses being made.
Your turn – write body paragraph 1 for the
practice question
Practice question: Discuss how real places, events and / or people have been represented in a text you
have studied.

You already have a thesis statement for this question, and a set of topic sentences,
including one for the first body paragraph.

All you have to do is select some evidence (go back over the class work to help you
with this) and turn this into a body paragraph.

At the end of your paragraph, you need to include a linking sentence that connects
your ideas back to the question.
Now plan the first paragraph for the practice question using the planner below:
Practice question: Discuss how real places, events and / or people have been represented in a text you have studied.

Ideas Topic Sentences Evidence

   .  

Linking Sentence:
 Practice question: Discuss how real places, events and / or people have been represented in a
text you have studied.

Your Body Paragraph:

 Sample question: Explain how language devices and narrative conventions have shaped your response to an issue in a text you have
studied.
Reiterate Thesis The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas (2006) by John Boyne is an allegorical novel of
problematic historical value that uses narrative point of view, language patterns and
characterisation to construct the protagonist Bruno as naïve and self-centred in order
to justify why the German people failed to understand or act against the Holocaust.
This shapes my response as one of problematic empathy towards the Nazis and the
issue of childhood social conditioning into blind obedience as surely at some point we
have to take responsibility for our own actions.
Identify Key Ideas Bruno is conditioned to follow rules without question, and each day, he is given direct
evidence of how they do not apply equally to everyone, and this inequity is naturalized
through his mother’s passive aggressiveness and his father’s similarity to Hitler, who also
behaves as rudely as he pleases. We are also shown how Bruno’s privileged and sheltered
life has prevented him from seeing Shmuel’s suffering except through the prism of his own
life, where Bruno repeatedly imagines he is harder done by than the Jewish boy facing the
atrocities of Auschwitz, though of course in the end Bruno and Shmuel share the same fate.

Purpose or Power of Text
This novel has been justly criticised as unrealistic, and though I can suspend some of
my judgement as I recognise the novel is meant to be allegorical rather than entirely
historically accurate, I do think it should only be taught as a flawed text with good
intentions around exploring how the German public could have allowed the
Holocaust to happen… but the reality is, there can never be any justification for such
a horrific event.
Your turn – write a conclusion for the practice question
Practice question: Discuss how real places, events and / or people have been represented in a text you have studied.

Reiterate Thesis

Identify Key Ideas

Purpose or Power of Text

• In order to prepare for your essay, you should:
• Make sure you know the context
• Make sure you know the text – plot,
characters, QUOTES, language features,
structural devices (e.g. narrative point of
view, voice, technical codes,
characterization, symbolism, etc)
• Do multiple essay plans on a range of
questions (see next slide for more questions
to practice with) – deconstructing
questions, writing thesis statements and
topic sentences, applying relevant evidence
• DRAFT and SEEK FEEDBACK
Start with the practice questions from the
task brief:

1. Discuss how individuals or groups have

been represented in a text you have
studied using a range of language
features. 

2. Consider how a text you have studied

changed or challenged your view of a
particular issue.
More practice
questions
(some additional practice questions)

• Discuss how characters have been constructed to convey

ideas about society in a text you have studied.
• How has narrative structure and / or narrative voice
influenced your response to one or more texts you have
studied?
• Discuss how a text you have studied develops empathy for
disempowered people and/or groups.
• Explore the ways in which language patterns and motifs are
used to convey meaning in a text you have studied.
• Discuss the way in which language and / or structure have
been used to convey values and attitudes in one or more
texts you have studied.
Break Down the Question

•H Highlight the command word in the question

what is it asking you to do?
•U  Underline the concepts and conditions.
•C Circle the critical term.
•S   Structure your answer – make a plan
PLAN your Response

There is a generic essay structure available for you

to use.

Planning leads to better answers!

WRITE A DRAFT SEEK FEEDBACK
Spend time on your notes – one page of A4
notes, size 10 font – make them count! I
suggest focusing on evidence and
techniques rather than particular topics as
you will not know the questions beforehand.
You might choose to focus on a range of
techniques and list examples, eg symbolism,
motifs, language patterns, characterization,
narrative structure, values, omission,
context (always important regardless of the
question), etc.