Cons Helping Conshttp://www.conshelpingcons.com Life after Prison | Basic Steps to Making it on the OutsideFirst I want to point out that I am not going to focus on steps to getting out of prison, formost people time does this for you. If you were sentenced to 10 years you have a releasedate and will get out, regardless of almost all circumstances. It is only for people whohave been released or are about to be released. If you want to make these steps work it isbest to start and prepare for them while you are in prison, jail or a correctional facility.If you are about to leave prison soon or have recently, there are steps in which you needto take in order to stay on the outside. It can often take you a long time to get out and avery short time to go back. Many end up having there parole revoked within the first 24-48 hours so it is very important you have the necessary steps in place before your release.You need to follow all these steps, and will have to work hard to make it. It will takeevery bit of effort and strength you have to do this; you will need to master them to stayout of prison, however you will only need to not do one of them to go back inside of prison. These are initial steps, what you need to do from the first day and work throughfor the first year. Hopefully you will be able to build the ground work to stay out of prison. What you do in your first year and even the first month of your new freedom willultimately decide how long you choose to live in the real world.Support Groups & People Who Can HelpThe most important step is the one you start inside prison, a support group of people youcan call, visit or work with. Depending on how long you have been inside prison thisgroup could be as small as one (better to be at least 3 or more). One of the biggestmistakes most convicts make when leaving prison, is not having a safe group of support.You will need to develop a network of people that do not have criminal pasts, or limitedassociations (preferable with a professional associate). If your family is involved in crimeyou may find this hard to take, but you need to move away from them, if all your friendsbefore you went to prison do any type of illegal activity, find new ones. There are usuallya lot of volunteers that come into the prison for numerous events; perhaps some of thosepeople may be able to assist you. There are a lot of religious places that you can go,however, please understand I am in no way putting these places down, however they arefull of excons who are not changed, simply playing the system from the outside. So keepthe people who are using these services at an arms length, until enough time has past tosee there true intentions, and even then only very passive friendship. With that said, theseare often great places to find support and someone to talk to, chaplaincy are located inmost major cities and almost always not to far from a halfway house.I have often heard many guys say the first thing they want to do it get laid, drunk andhigh, and not always in that order. However if you are serious about making it you maywant to consider giving yourself sometime to be re-socialized. Our immanent wants need
to take a back seat to what we really need. I personally waited a full year before I starteddating anyone; yes it was hard after a long time inside prison. However at this point I liketo remind you I have been out over 10 years and now sex and having a few beers aresomething I can do whenever I want now. You have to ask yourself, would you ratherhave a life time of freedom or 1-2 days of excitement that land you right back in jail. If this does happen to you will always have someone to share your stories with in your cell.While your family suffers, and your kids do not have a father or mother, you will alwayshave someone to brag to about your 48 hours of freedom. Prisons will give you plenty of time for you and your loser friends to reminisce. This site is not a sympathy ground forrepeat offenders. We all make mistake, some much larger then others, it is time to stoprepeating them and grow up.The First 48 HoursThe truth of the matter is most of you who are convicted of a crime, or serving a prisonsentence, will not be reading this till after your 3rd or 4th release. Why? Because most of the people who are released from incarceration, have there parole revoked in this periodof time, and more to follow in the first week. It is the time when you are most vulnerable;you are at your weakest point. However, most prisoners let arrogance and lack of common sense get in the way at this point, and disregard what everyone has told us, andwere looking for 3 things, get laid, get drunk and get stoned. Then in most cases an arrestor parole revocation takes place and the whole process starts all over again.Immediate steps to surviving the first 48 hours are simply:, you need to hang out withyour support group. I mean the boring ones that don't do crime and who are veryconcerned about your welfare and if you actually make it on the outside. The problem isthat this seems so awkward and you will feel like a fish out of water. The other problemis that you will feel way too comfortable with the old crowd, and sure hanging out withthem will be fun for a bit. You need to move away from that, it is time to grow up now,and get a real life. You will have to move out of your comfort zone.Another thing you will need to do is follow all the rules of you parole release. You willneed to have all your faculties to do this. You cannot do this drunk or stoned, even if you're not alcoholic or drug addicted, you have too much hanging in the balance. Youronly worry should be those rules, and spending as much time as you can with yoursupport group, and staying away from old influences. Ask questions and do not comeacross as arrogant or over confident. Follow all the rules to the letter no exceptions therealways room at the Crowbar Bar Inn if you find this to burdensome.The first few weeks are when you should be spending time with your support network,perhaps spending time with family, or spouse if applicable. Your focus should only be onfollowing the rules of the halfway house, parole or probation in the first couple months.Depending on how long you have been inside prison, perhaps just talking to people overa coffee, or spending sometime just talking to normal people. You are still going to havethe other offenders that are in the halfway house or ones you may know in that area wantto talk to you a little, at first be polite, you do not have to run away every time you see
someone who you know from prison or the halfway house. However turn down thereoffers to do something with them that they may ask you to do, always have an excusewhy you cannot talk to them for too long. Over time this will just naturally distanceyourself from them, and soon you won't even talk anymore.Questionable Activities or AssociationsGetting out of prison early for some may take months or years of work, programs,counseling and tremendous efforts. Only too often to be thrown away, by associatingwith the wrong crowd or being in the wrong place. It takes an enormous amount of foresight to stay out of prison and guard your freedom, especially when first released andon parole. Do you know how hard it is to go back to prison? Do nothing. This particularlytrue when you are released and sent to a halfway house or just injected back into thecommunity, especially the same area where your crime was committed. It never failsthere is always people at the halfway house you knew in prison or associated with whilethere, and quite often you will be invited to do things with them. Even if you are notfacing that and go to a whole new place were no one knows you, sometimes you will notfeel like you fit in with regular people. Some people refer to this as sliding backwards, Idon't like that term, simply because you were never a head enough at this point to slideback.Perhaps an example of some of the simplest things I have seen that caused guys to returnto prison will help. I have meant a lot of convicts in the halfway house, who didn't havedrinking restrictions on them (imposed conditions of parole). They felt that they werethen safe to go to the bars, come back to the halfway house drunk or smelling of liquor.Over and over again I would see guys get there parole revoked over incidents that wasonly precipitated by drinking or being in the wrong place. I recall a person who wasallowed to drink come back to the halfway house one evening, he smelt of liquor andanother convict there, pushed his buttons. Why? He was jealous he was not allowed to, henever came right out and said that, however, he started a fight with the fellow withoutrestrictions, and of course both of their parole releases were revoked. Another wouldcome into the halfway house and be nasty to the staff, he soon found himself beingarrested for drunk and disorderly. Another person who was at some friends of his, whowere all known criminals, was sent back for associations with them, after the police werecalled for loud music to the residence. Upon opening the door the police could smellmarijuana and invested further, he was not smoking he just happen to be there. Paroledidn't quite see it the way he did, parole was revoked.The problem is when you are on parole you cannot just watch yourself; you have to becareful of others as well. Parole is like defensive driving you just do not follow the rulesof the road, you also much watch what the other drivers are doing to avoid an accident.Once the cars are smashed up or someone is hurt, it really doesn't matter whose fault itwas, the aftermath and annoyance will be much the same for both. You will need to keeppast criminal associations at an arms length; you will need to avoid areas wherequestionable activities can happen. You do not have to do it forever but the first year thisis a must, regardless of parole restrictions or not.
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