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Salem Statesman Journal 11/23/2012

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LOVE, CARE FOR LOVED ONES

For caregivers, life is full of challenges and rewards

Black Friday starts e for som shopper

By Kaellen Hessel
Statesman Journal

Janet Klosterman takes care of her mother, Violet, at the Sweet Bye N Bye facility. Violet suffers from dementia and requires constant care. THOMAS PATTERSON / STATESMAN JOURNAL By Saerom Yoo
Statesman Journal

Violet Kruger, 90, isnt herself lately. She isnt able to walk around Lancaster Mall when her daughter, Janet Klosterman, visits her at her care facility three times a week. She cant socialize with the other residents in the family room, either, because she cant leave her bed. The fact is though she needs frequent reminders she has a spontaneous fracture of her right thigh bone. So instead shes becoming familiar with the bedroom she has slept in for half a year. Kruger has dementia, and with each episode like the femur break, her confusion worsens. On a recent Tuesday evening, Klosterman sat by Krugers bed, exchanging stories about their family, past and present. Kruger shuts her eyes, rubbing her forehead, in hopes that a detail will click into recognition. Every once in awhile, a light of clarity would pass across her face and shed acknowledge her surroundings the unfamiliar visitors and the room shes in. She jokingly threatens to stick her tongue out at the photographer. Well this is a nice little house,

Program director Evelyn Ostermann, left, chats with Adela Haines at Among Friends, which is an adult respite care program at Center 50+ where caregivers can drop off their loved ones. KOBBI R. BLAIR / STATESMAN JOURNAL

A line of several hundre around the side of Toys R U around the corner and into th shopper with the sole purpos eted item and saving money. Holiday shopping season ed with the ever earlier chao day. More and more stores and Walmart opened on some as early as 8 pm. Toys R Us gave out gift b coupons for future savings, p al and small toys to the first tw ers. Some customers hoped t Customers seemed upbeat and polite. Before the doors opened, one employee joked, Just do me a favor and dont knock me over. The front of the crowd assured her they would behave but couldnt make any promises about those further back. The first group of women in line had sent a proxy to save their spot at 10:30 a.m. The item they most wanted? Diapers. Each woman has a young baby or grand baby. Babies R Us is selling an 84 pack of diapers for $10. E lowed to purchase four pack Shirley Smith, of northea theyll save $10 to15 per pack total for the group of four fri The group was also plann maximum of four packs of d of wipes is on sale for $5. The friends didnt want to ticket items. Only one woman up some other toys. Items in high demand for Monster High Dolls and elec Rachel Griffin, who was o in line, said the chaos of the n gets all of her holiday shoppi 12 hours, she said. Griffin pla to visit Target, Old Navy and I have to get the babysitt all done, she said.

she suddenly said, scanning her bedroom. Looks like its got room for everything. Klosterman emphatically agreed, her voice always loud and clear, yet gentle and encouraging. Klosterman is one of about halfmillion caregivers in Oregon who are putting their own lives on hold for the well-being and quality of life of a loved one. While the population of

family caregivers is diverse, it is increasingly becoming a reality for the Baby Boomer generation as their parents age. Only 3.7 percent of Oregonians 65 and older access publicly-funded long-term care, said Mike McCormick, deputy director of aging and people with disabilities at the DeSee CARE, Page 3A

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Salem Statesman Journal 11/23/2012 StatesmanJournal.com

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Janet Klosterman takes care of her mother, Violet, at the Sweet Bye N Bye facility. THOMAS PATTERSON / STATESMAN JOURNAL

Care
Continued from Page 1A

partment of Human Services. That means the remainder are independent, paying privately or receiving help from a family member. Long-term care is quite expensive, so its a tremendous benefit to everyone the service that family caregivers provide, McCormick said. In Oregon, about 620,000 family caregivers provide $5 billion in unpaid care each year, according to AARP. They have long been a vital part of the larger long-term care system, but experts and officials are anticipating their burden to grow heavier. By 2040, Oregons 65 years and older population is projected to hit 1.1 million. People are living longer in general, including those with disabilities, and health care costs are increasing.

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Lucia Smith (left) explains an art project to Donna Schmitz while volunteer Marilyn Halgrimson chats with Jim Prine during an adult respite care program at Center 50+. KOBBI
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Hilarious, sweet, frustrating

Klosterman sees the need all around her. She has four friends in the East Valley area who all care for their parents. They each have unique challenges and different care plans, but they still relate and support one another. Some of it is just hilarious, Klosterman said. Some of it is so sweet and so endearing. Some of it is just extraordinarily frustrating. Most of that frustration for Klosterman came two years ago, when Kruger was having a difficulty accepting that something was wrong and that she needed help. The denial manifests itself in anger. Each evening before dinner, Klosterman would pray that shed have the strength to get through the meal. I would just try to understand that she was in a zone of losing so much, Klosterman said. You have to be empathetic. Nowadays, Kruger is agreeable and pleasant hospitable, even. Does anybody want a cup of coffee? shed say,

lifting the blankets off her legs, sliding them toward the edge of the bed. For about the seventh time, Klosterman catches her mothers frail legs and moves them back toward the center. She patiently reminds her mother that her right leg cant bear any weight. Its broken, she explains. Minutes pass, and Kruger tries again. The determination is very much the mother Klosterman knows. Shes not a person to give up, she said. She has never given up. And thank goodness for that. Although Kruger is in a 24-hour care facility, Klosterman believes she and her five sisters have a duty to stay involved. Shes the only one in the area who is retired, so a bulk of that lies on her shoulders. People sometimes ask, if her mother doesnt remember, why so much effort? Her reply: the same reasons the rest of us need love and attention. In a week you might not remember who hugged you but that emotion stays with you and makes you grow and become who you are, she said. Beyond that, its a safety and protection measure. A familys consistent presence at a facility can ensure that the patient gets better care.

Catching a break
If there are caregivers like Klosterman, who supplement the work of professionals, plenty become the 24/7 caregivers themselves. Teresa Haines, for example, moved in with her mother, Adela Haines, 212 years ago. Teresa helps her mother dress, eat, wash, pay bills everything. She cant afford to put Adela in a care home, but she also couldnt afford to be consumed by the burden of caregiving. She hired two part-time helpers supplemented with her own retirement savings and uses respite offered by Center 50+ on Portland Road NE. What I need No. 1 is a break, she said. Jerry Cohen, state director of AARP Oregon, said respite support is a policy goal for the next session of the Oregon Legislature. It may not have to be a welfare program families could be charged for services. But caregivers need more support. If you dont care for yourself as a caregiver, youre going to need a caregiver yourself, Cohen said. Thats vital. Research that AARP has done validates that. Cohen also wants employers to offer support to workers who double as

caregivers. Training, resources and support groups are other ideas that could offer relief. Teresa relishes the alone time she gets when she drops off Adela. It doesnt matter what she does with the time. It could be a drive through the country roads, coffee with a friend or a trip to Silverton. The few hours she has to herself is like recharging a battery. Im fine to go back home and go at it again, she said.

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For Klosterman, her life as a caregiver is a blessing. This is a beautiful time of life. she said. This has been a blessing to our family that weve been able to walk this with her. Its not that her responsibilities are easy. But she also knows she isnt alone in the journey. Im not unique in any way and Im so proud of my generation that theyre embracing this, she said. I see my generation as really bucking up. We wont have to say I wish I had done something more.
syoo@Statesman Journal.com, (503) 399-6673 or follow at Twitter.com/syoo.

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