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Memo

To: Professor Musselman From: Natalie Audelo CC: Mr. Garafulic and Ms. Malouse Date: 10/1/13 Re: Unit 1, Draft 1 Dear Professor Musselman, I sincerely appreciate you taking the time to not only review my paper, but further discuss the knowledge front during office hours. Your advice prompted me to read the text for deeper meaning and look for hidden clues in the margins. Using a narrower focus, I was able to recognize the authors subtle undertones and relationship to the knowledge front. I used the comments on the side of the draft as a guide for making revisions. At first, I had difficulty inserting my own voice into the draft. However, after prompting from you, Mr. Garafulic, and the class, I decided to take a bold and assertive approach by opening the paper with a personal anecdote that established my relationship to the knowledge front. All of the reviewers also encouraged the use of more specific and concrete examples to back up claims. Mr. Garafulic succinctly noted, What could be improved however, is the amount of numbers and specific data presented by Linick and Lubienski. You also touched on this idea by citing specific statements that would benefit from evidentiary support. While making revisions, I added quote snippets from the text to help support the claims that I was making. For example, I used the following quote to substantiate my claim that the authors were troubled by the fields application of economic principles to education policy. Economists have developed a variety of models for studying strategic behavior under competitive pressure, but little of this type of study has been applied to school systems; the studies that have been conducted show mixed results(Linick & Lubienski, 2013). Ms. Malouse also brought up some insightful points that helped guide my drafting process. She asked about education buzzwords such as school choice and privatization. I tried to connect these terms to the knowledge front by raising questions about stakeholders (the individuals responsible for privatization) in charter schools and the role they play in the nature of school choice. This line of thought inspired me to delve deeper into the knowledge front and present the reader with a series of questions for thought.

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I sincerely appreciate all the time that you, Mr. Garafulic, Ms. Malouse, and the class took in addressing and critiquing my paper. Sincerely, Natalie Audelo

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