Medina 1 Arlene Medina John Kubler English 114A 4 December 2013 Power Dynamics: Who has it more?

To find a couple where I could secretly observe and I know would be more than willing to answer my questions was the beach. I went to the Santa Monica Promenade, where I sat down outside of Starbucks and just observed a couple. So at the Promenade there are a lot of stores and in between theres street performances of people dancing and singing. The couple I observed where sitting at a bench together looking at men break-dancing and just entertaining. When I first observed them, I notice the guy had his right arm over his girlfriend and she just had her left arm touching his knee. Because they were both entertained they would laugh together but he never removed his arm around her. They would clap and she would go back in touching his knee and he would go back in putting his arm around her. Almost to the ending of the performance, they actually both stood up to give money for the performance, but right before that I notice he hand now both his hands inside his pockets and she had one of her arms somehow twisted around his arm. She was more around him. Since the setting is Santa Monica, near the bench where its a little windy she would lean in more into him to get a little warmer and he would just stand there allowing himself. After observing the couple and even during observing the couple I truly assumed that the guy had more control/power in the relationship. By the way he made her feel safe by putting his hand around her for protection and when they stood up he stopped putting his hand around her now he had it in his pockets just standing straight. So just by the fact how he was touching her versus how she was all around him, it made me believe he had more control because he was

Medina 2 making her feel safe. After interviewing them I noticed I was wrong, when asking them who do you think is more dominant in the relationship he instantly said her and she stayed quiet, she didnt say he had power. Furthermore, when I also asked who made the first move he instantly said her, and once again she didnt say much. He elaborated and said it really didnt take much persuasion because they were really feeling each other when they first met. I believe the guy in the relationship lets his girlfriend do as she desires, I recognized it when I asked how do you feel about women competing against men in the Olympics and he immediately answered with they should be allowed to, women have as much skills as men do. So just by his answer I can definitely see that he allows his girlfriend to take control and have some saying in their relationship. The couple doesnt see that their sex/gender should have any friction in their relationship or just because hes a man he has more control over her. When I showed the couple the Dolce & Gabbana ad, both of them agreed that the three women in the picture had control over the men. I dont necessarily believe that the girl in the relationship is a pro-feminist or that theres a female dominance in the relationship. However, if I can put the power dynamics in a balance I could say that the girl has a little more control over her boyfriend. He isnt closed minded and he certainly doesnt run the relationship in believing males should have all power. Moreover, one of the last questions I asked the couple was what makes true love possible in todays modern society and without any thinking they both said, Connection, honesty, faithfulness, and respect. This is what the couple believes is the secret in being successful in a relationship and lasting in a loving relationship.

Medina 3 1. What city do you live in? Guy, Marina del Rey. Girl, Palisades 2. How much time do you spend together each day? All day 3. Where do you usually go for a romantic night out? Anywhere with colorful light, like the beach with soft lighting. 4. Who seemed to be more interested in hooking up? Undecided, he said she did and she said he did. 5. Who made the first move to break the ice and start the relationship? She did, It really didnt take much for us to start dating because instantly we were feeling each other so it was me trying to going out with her and she wanted to go out with me too. 6. Should female track lovers be allowed to race with men in Olympics Yes, women are no different as men and they have as much skills as anybody else. 7. Who do you think is more dominant in your relationship? She is. 8. What makes true love possible in your relationship in todays modern society? Connection, honesty, faithfulness, and respect. 9. In the movie Crazy, Stupid, Love why do you think Cals wife wanted to divorce Cal? Because they were losing their spark, she needed the spark to continue. 10. How long have you guys been together? A year and six months, today!