VOICE OF LOVE

"I want to wipe away at least some of the pain; no one can wipe away all the pain completely, but every smile brought out makes you sleep better for a night. We may not be able to make everyone always happy but we can make a lot of people temporarily happy, and I believe in doing that."
very time I see a new born child, the child's parents and grandparents ask me, "Who does the child resemble - the father or the mother or ..." My reply has remained the same for the past seven years, "The child looks like himself / herself" The greatest wonder of life isn't the similarities that each new born brings into this world but the uniqueness it brings along with its birth. What it means to realise that in the history of the world, there has been nobody like you and to the infinite of time to come, there will be no one like you... that HE does not repeat another of your kind! These are the mysteries of life that I do not even attempt to demystify but just

Sudha Ragunathan
the priceless vocal cord of this incomparable personality - Sudha Ragunathan.

I believe, creating, producing and delivering music is not just the rightful blend and balance of Sa Re Ga Ma Pa Da Ne, the fundamental adherence to grammar, the skills and One such unique wonder was born knowledge that go with it, the and in her first crying, the world innovation and creativity... it isn't would have hardly anticipated the just all these; it is an expression of the horizons this voice would engulf entirety of the personality from encompass and enthral. Today, this whom the music is born. Like in the voice lingers in the hearts of billions; right Guru, you cannot separate the it vibrates in the bedrooms, drawing message from the messenger, for a rooms and puj a rooms of millions of part of the Guru lives in all his homes; it has echoed in many messages, even in the right musician, celebrated auditoriums of the world. a part of him/her lives in all the music People travel miles to listen to the that finds expression through them. melody that expresses itself though Don't the sun's rays carry the
Roan rkwars

wonder at ... remain awestruck by ... be grateful for ... and I smile between tears just experiencing these mysteries. I firmly believe that with the birth of every child and its first crying, the world hears a voice that it has never heard before... never in the entire history of the world.

ED

November 2002

A SALUTE

Mi
the first ten years of Sudha's life were rosy, the next ten years were too thorny, far more than what the family could handle. There were days when they did not have enough to eat and not enough good clothes to wear. There was always sadness and melancholy at home. However, Sudha's mother was determined in the midst of all those ordeals that her children's education should never suffer and Sudha's music classes should never stop. Sudha joined the Science group in Ethiraj College for her PUC (Pre University College) as she aspired to be a doctor. She fainted in the laboratory on several instances during that phase, as there wasn't much to eat and she had to walk to and from college everyday. Her house was sans electricity as they could not pay the bills and she had to study in the light of the corridor. A Chemistry teacher of Sudha (she must be a God sent messenger) advised Sudha not to take up a career in medicine. She advised Sudha, "Anybody can be a doctor but not everybody can have a VOICE like yours." So Sudha opted for Economics in her graduation. Talking of her college life, Sudha said, "No one ever knew about the darker side of my life. For me, my integrity towards my parents was very important and I never wanted to let them down. Even though nothing was okay back home, I did not allow that to affect my college life. I was this bubbly-freak-out-kind, enjoying every moment of my college life but yet, I always suppressed my natural instincts and desires as my character was very important to me. My

qualities of the sun? So is the case the school demanded each of its with this world renowned Classical students to find their self expression. Carnatic Vocal Maestro. The person After a very rosy childhood for a she is, is much larger than the decade, life began to show traces of vocalist the world knows of. Her its cruel side. Business wasn't going music is just the signature of the well and the monsoons betrayed person she really is. Through this them for years together and kept edition of 'A Salute', Frozen them from having a harvest from the Thoughts salutes this angel of a lands they owned. Financial decline personality, Sudha Ragunathan. began and assets they had to sell off Venkataraman, who had assets in their one after another. The Tamil Nadu that could have lasted bungalow, the cars and the helpers for generations, set up his own were all gone and Sudha's family had business in Bangalore. His wife, to shift to a rented house. Sudha had Choodamani was a highly resolute to go to school by walk. Yet, nothing lady. Sudha was born as the second deterred the academic brilliance of child to them at a time when Sudha; she was always a class affluence was expressing itself in all topper, be it in academics or debate forms in the family. A Bungalow, or for that matter acting as Mother cars, servants, watchmen... Mary for Christmas. At the age of everything was available in eight, Sudha started learning the fundamentals of Carnatic music abundance. from her mother. "It was Puttaparthi Sai Baba who named me Geetha Sudha, saying he Business and financial challenges would call me Geetha and I would be began to spill into the family and Sudha for the rest of the world. I ruffle family harmony. Home wasn't grew up in an atmosphere of music, the paradise it used to be and there listening to bhajans all the time. I was always an uneasy calm in the started rendering devotional house. The family relocated to recitations when I was merely one- Madurai. Sudha did her 8th standard and-a-half years of age. My mother at the St. Joseph's, Madurai. The tells me repeatedly that I was a child family after a span of one year who never complained, did not cry, relocated to Chennai. was well behaved and was always a From her 9th standard, Sudha quick learner who could absorb studied in Good Shepherd Convent things like a sponge. The first five and as always excelled in academics years of my life, I was the apple of and also played Basketball for her everyone's eyes, for I was Baba's School. He mother felt that Sudha favourite child," said Sudha needed a formal initiation into music. So from the age of fourteen, recal I ing her toddler days. She did her early schooling in she learnt from T.V. Viswanathan Bangalore from Sophia Convent, a and then from B.V. Lakshman. school which Sudha believes was instrumental in shaping her confidence and independence, for The financial situation in the family was only deteriorating from bad to worse and from worse to worst. If
RozEn 2OUG14:1

November 2002

A SALUTE

U
carry on her legacy. No major progress is possible without your Guru's blessings and in that sense I am abundantly blessed." In 1982, Sudha got married to Ragunathan. She recalls, "It was a very nervous phase for both my Guru and me, for we weren't sure as to how my marriage would affect my progress. My Guru, MLV cautioned Ragunathan on the sacrifices he would have to make in marrying such a promising and upcoming artist. I was fortunate to walk into a very affectionate family. Though my in-laws admired the daughter-inlaw in me, and my husband cherished me as his wife, they found it very difficult to reconcile with the passionate musician in me. Raghu would come home only to find me leaving for my concert. My career graph was soaring high. It was tough on him and it showed up in his temperament. There were imbalances and sparks. Two years into the marriage, my first son, Kaushik was born and the arrival of the child fortunately brought about a turnaround in family harmony." In 1990, Sudha was pregnant for the second time. MLV's health began to deteriorate and she was diagnosed with Secondary Cancer. MLV took a promise from Sudha that she would not miss performing in the December Music Season, irrespective of what happens. In October, MLV became critical and could not even speak and yet whenever she saw me, she would murmur, "Sudha... Sudha..." On October 31st 1990, MLV passed away. "To uphold the promise that I had made to my Guru, I endured my advanced pregnancy and kept

lecturers were very affectionate towards me. College gave me greater scope to express my musical capabilities and I came first wherever I went. I also represented college in Essay writing, Debates, Dramatics, Quiz... in every conceivable field of activity. I was mostly outside college participating in Inter-Collegiate competitions. Initially, crowds used to boo me whenever I sang Classical Carnatic vocal but soon I stamped my class and earned an identity for myself in all city Colleges. Even though I had only a few sets of good dresses to wear, only curd rice to eat and had to walk the distance from home to college, I conducted myself so well that people used to respect me. I was called the 'Nightingale' of my college. Every challenge I faced only made my grit and determination even stronger to overcome them all. 'I will prove...' has always been my mantra. I was first the Treasurer of my College Union and then became the Vice President. I not only won the prestigious 'Service to the College' medal but also became the first girl to win the 'Outstanding student of the year' award for three consecutive years." Sudha wanted to pursue her IAS and serve the country. However, on the insistence of her mother, Sudha applied for the Government of India Scholarship given to young artistes for advanced training in music. When she went for the interview, she handled all practical aspects of the interview with aplomb but was stumped when asked a theoretical question for which she did not know the answer. However, she noticed the lip movements of one of those in

the audience and repeated the same. "My shrewdness and His grace saw me through and I got the scholarship. It went on to become the most important turning point of my life. My family had always adored Dr. M. L. Vasantha Kumari (MLV), a genius in her own rights and my mother suggested that it would be a blessing if I could learn from her. So, I went to meet MLV in 1977. She asked me to sing a few songs and then consented to guide me. She has been the greatest influence on my life," added Sudha with reverence and gratitude imprinted on her face. Winning for the first time is an accident. Winning the second time is an incident. When you win the third time... Oh, winning becomes your habit. Sudha was busy learning and practicing new songs, taking part in all the singing competitions and winning most of them. The music world began to echo, "The star is on the rise." Simultaneously, she completed her Post Graduation in Economics. She was also singing Choral Music for All India Radio for the sake of remuneration, which the family desperately needed. Speaking of her Guru MLV, Sudha said, "MLV believed that growth is caught and not taught. She would not teach any songs.. She would sing; and I had to learn by observation. By accompanying her to all her performances, I came to learn the songs. I learnt while singing along with her, for she would turn her head every time I faltered and that would make me realise where I had gone wrong. Later she would gently point out my lapses. She took care of me almost like her own daughter. Somewhere she believed that I could
pozEn
ZFOUGI-E3

November 2002

A SALUTE

singing till January 3rd and the crowds I drew that year were phenomenal. Maalavika, my daughter was born on January 20th. Ever since my profession has been on A high and my life has not been mine Escalating assignments, tours abroad, awards... life has been so fast... twelve years have passed by and it appears as if it was just yesterday that we lost MIN." Sudha draws unparalleled crowds to all her concerts, wherever she performs. The constant echo in the music world is, 'Here is MLV's legacy'. In fact, one of the most popular and looked up to music critics once remarked, "If I were to ever find myself alone on a deserted island but have Sudha's audio cassette with me, then I would not mind it." Speaking of the impact of her husband on her life, Sudha elaborated, "Both Raghu and I have understood that your spouse can never be a product of your thinking Since the similarities between us are more than the differences, it has offset the challenges in our relationship. But for Raghu, I could not have survived as a singer. So many months in a year, I am not home and even when in Chennai, I am not home for so many hours. It is he who has kept everything going. His don't-care-attitude, courage and casual outlook towards life are his assets. It is so difficult to be a celebrity's husband, more so, because of the insensitivity and stupidity with which people relate with him. Moving forward in life has forced me to encounter a lot of gossip and bad mouthing, and unfortunately they have also drawn

Raghu into many of those. Nothing jolts him and I do not know from where he gets the strength to brush all this aside. It is actually Ragunathan that you should salute." About her children, Sudha clarified, "My children are one of my greatest blessings. They are so independent. If they weren't so understanding, I could not be going out to perform day after day. I will be a little sad if neither of my children takes up music but their happiness would override my sadness. I just want them to be achievers in whatever they do. Rather than being a reluctant mediocre in music, let them be willing Numero Uno's in whatever they do." When I asked about what she cherishes the most after music, Sudha said, "My family; playing and cracking jokes with them and walking alone with the voice of nature in the background. Finally the bear hugs I share with Maalavika." When I queried her on how she takes care of her health, Sudha explained, "First-of-all, it is easy for me to give up anything in life. When I come to know that something is harmful, I just give it up. I believe in giving up something lower in order to gain something higher. My affinity for divinity, my clean inner personality and my inner purity takes care of my health. Singing is such a meditation that it removes all my inner toxicity and cleanses me. Of course, my smiling face and my ability to laugh (her laughter can be every poet's dream) adds to my fabulous health." Listing her strengths, Sudha said, "I can filter out the positive elements in
RozEn L- FoucEn

everything. My courage, contrasting passivity, determination to achieve, endurance, focus, resilience, my craving to improve my music everyday and faith in the divine are my strengths. I have immeasurable love in my heart for everything and everyone. Above all, I cherish my clinging to my husband and my children. Whatever I do, wherever I am, they are always in my mind every moment." "What about your weaknesses," I then asked. She spontaneously replied, "My procrastination, the lethargy that sets in after a rigorous schedule and the lenience with which I do not practice for days at a stretch are my weaknesses." For someone who gives about 160 concerts all over the world, then all those audio recordings, media coverage and the endless functions to preside over in 365 days, if these are her weaknesses, then for the first time, I have actually understood the meaning of 'Over Achiever'. In 1999, Sudha founded 'Samudhaaya Foundation' and contributed hundreds ofthousands of rupees during the Kargil war, Orissa cyclone, Gujarat Earthquake and also to destitute and old age Homes. Speaking of her social contributions, Sudha said, "I want to wipe away at least some of the pain; no one can wipe away all the pain completely but every smile brought out makes you sleep better for a night. We may not be able to make everyone always happy but we can make a lot of people temporarily happy, and I believe in doing that." Sudha has enthralled audiences all over the world with her singing.
.

November 2002

A SALUTE

Apart from all the major cities in India, Sudha had performed in United States of America, Canada, United Kingdom, Switzerland, Denmark, Holland, France, Germany, Australia, UAE, Bahrain, Italy, Luxemburg, Austria, Finland, Muscat, Singapore, Philippines, Jakarta, Malaysia, New Zealand, Sri Lanka and South Africa. With tears of fulfilment trickling down, she said, "My music has touched so many lives, healed them and pulled them out of depression. People say that my music is their companion during their depression. A woman once told me, after I lost my husband, it was your music that brought me back to life. That is why I do not see their intrusions into my privacy as a nuisance. If someone recognises me somewhere, I know they must be someone from my audience, who is responsible for my success." Success is always punctuated with failures, though with star performers like Sudha they may be far and few. She said, "I cannot sleep over my mistakes and failures. Some times I cry, sometimes I sing it out, sometimes I meditate and sometimes I write poetry about it. It is during these times that I miss a friend - a lap to lie on and cry without any questions being asked about my tears. Rajan, it is absolutely lonely at the top. However, after all that, I fist up and get ready to fight back. I always bounce back ...instantly." "In all this achieving, have you missed something in life?" I asked. With an inexplicable solitude engulfing her, she said, "At every stage of life, whatever you would term as normal to that phase of life, I have missed it all. I have missed my

home a lot and I have certainly Having experienced this wondermissed out on being a normal parent woman for five hours, I felt like to my children. As a wife, I haven't running to the top of my six-storybeen with Raghu always, sometimes building and screaming, "If any one I wasn't there physically and of you is searching for a role model sometimes I wasn't there mentally. I for your child, this is the person... had to trade a lot for the purpose of this is the person - Sudha Ragunathan." Sudha's life has my life." everything - happiness, sadness, Having won over 250 state level, relationship, solitude, enthusiasm, national and international awards, I asked her, with all this adulation, passivity, affluence, poverty, "How do you keep your feet on the leadership, disciple-hood, celebrity ground?" With reverberating status, care, courage, tenderness, laughter she said, "Otherwise I will challenges, solutions, laughter and fall down!" She continued, "The tears... everything... all possible world believes I have achieved paradoxes blended into one life. something In music, yes, I have Could it be that Sudha's life was come from L.K.G to Higher God's chosen melody that he Secondary... but I still have composed with all the ragas he could graduation and post graduation to do. express into one tune? Having I don't look at what I have done. I experienced her, I am convinced that look at what is left to be done and I I heard a very special tune. To me, Sudha's life is God's music. Silence am progressing towards it." please! Do not disturb... the music is About the foot prints she is bound to still on... leave behind in the world, Sudha said, "When I struggled through the "At every fork of my ups and downs of life and when I had hit the bottom, I made a resolve that I life, someone came will make a mark in this world. Of along, held my hand at course, the working towards it has been gradual. I would like to make a the appropriate time mark in this world which is beyond and led me in the right music, so that a hundred years from direction. My wealth is now, someone on hearing my name should be able to smile and say, 'Oh, in the good will of my she was a heaven of a woman'." Sudha concluded saying, "At every fork of my life, someone came along, held my hand at the appropriate time and led me in the right direction. My wealth is in the good will of my well wishers and in the endless positive spiritual energy that surrounds me. These are ways by which God shows me that He is always with me."
FRozEn
EFOUEI-E3

well wishers and in the endless positive spiritual energy that surrounds me. These are ways by which God shows me that He is always with me."

November 2002