LIVING & DYING

I read once that no history of anything will ever contain more than it leaves out. Its true. Peole have
tried! can try! and will try again. "ut its true.
#o Ive got this $ig vacant stage with %istory. I suose this stage! as it is now! will $e %istory too soon
enough. &nd my dirt and holes and scratches and mar's! the words that I say and the sace that I ta'e
u! will $e $ro'en down and gone over with a fat $rush! and theyll say! ()ow! that stage was dirty!* or
(Loo' at this $ig! emty stage Ive got all to myself.*
&nd now Ive got less than two minutes all to myself on this stage! which is hardly enough time to
e+lain. "ut times li'e that! you 'now, You $reathe in and you live and you love and you fight and
fight hard to live and love as much as you can in the time youve got-then you $reathe out. #oon
enough someone will write the $oo's! and may$e theyll leave you out! their words the fat $rush that
aints over you! concealing your history from .ust a$out everyone. #o we all stand u here and fight to
ma'e a scratch or a mar' dee enough that it cant $e ignored in the hoe that someday someone will
see it and say! ()ow! he lived hard!* or (/an! what a fight!* and that you will live on in their
contemlation. &nd it doesnt matter that they dont understand yet! $ecause they will0in time. 1ach
man will learn what he can from histories and %istory! and the concerned man will $e met with the
same fate as one who ays no attention and lives in time as if each moment was the most imortant
moment of his life! thin'ing nothing of the little scratch or mar' he ma'es on the floor as his feet stride
across it! .u$ilant in his ahistorical $liss. 2he funny thing is that 2ime is so finite and also infinite3 we
feel it intensely in $oth its e+ansiveness and constraint! and yet it is intangi$le.
&nd then! may$e I should laugh-when we are constantly confronted with an endless hourglass and
somehow sand runs low! what else can we do, )hy not laugh, I send so much time slaving away
and utting on mas's to ma'e this scratch and that mar' that I rarely let my true self! whatever that is
these days! loose3 I rarely let myself run free enough to .ust throw my head $ac' and laugh. "ut why,
"ecause it ta'es too much time, &ll weve got is 2ime! until we dont anymore. 4se it u! $e free!
laugh if you can. "ecause! life, Its not that serious.