Rozanne Joseph B.

Ocampo
En12 R23
My Bedroom
It all started when we left Cavte to lve n Mar!na. I remem"er the fo#r of #s$ my mother
and my two yo#n%er ssters$ rdn% a "#s whle seen% my father wave hs r%ht hand thro#%h the
wndows of the "#s. &he ne't scene that I remem"er s the fo#r of #s wal!n% thro#%h the
streets of (ermalne )omes *#"dvson n Baran%ay +an%!a. ,e went nto a 2-storey ho#se
made of wood that has a wde lvn% room$ med#m-szed !tchen$ .#st the r%ht dnn% area and
/ small "edrooms. ,e were welcomed "y my 0ncle (epn% 1my mother2s half-"rother3 and my
4#nt *aln%. 0ncle Randy 14#nt *aln%2s "rother and my mother2s "est frend3 and 4#nt J#dth
were there as well. My co#sns 10ncle (epn% and 4#nt *aln%2s chldren3 were also there. &hey
tal!ed to my mother for ho#rs$ I ddn2t !now what they tal!ed a"o#t "#t I thn! the three of #s
were part of ther topc or topcs "eca#se there were occasonal %lances to the three of #s. 4nd
of co#rse$ they were tal!n% a"o#t sad thn%s.
I was s' years old "ac! then and we lved n my 0ncle (epn%2s ho#se #ntl I was seven
years old. My mom %ot a .o" and d#rn% the frst days of her wor! the three of #s were always
cryn% whenever she leaves. ,e weren2t #sed to that manner of lvn%$ we were #sed to always
havn% her "y o#r sde$ preparn% #s meals$ "athn% #s$ and sendn% #s to school. ,e were
pretty m#ch on o#r own #ntl the n%ht comes and the fo#r of #s wll sleep to%ether at my #ncle2s
lvn% room. I am very than!f#l to my #ncle2s famly "eca#se they share everythn% that they
have wth #s. 4sde from the lvn% room$ they share to #s ther whole ho#se$ food$ water and
electrcty.
,e contn#ed that sharn% system for another year "#t wthn another ho#sehold. &he
woods of my #ncle2s ho#se were chan%ed to cement$ ther 2-storey ho#se was chan%ed nto a
3-storey ho#se$ ther / small "edrooms "ecame 5 med#m-szed "edrooms$ and they had an
even wder lvn% room. ,hy all of these chan%es were "en% made$ my #ncle2s famly rented a
ho#se .#st 3 streets away from ther own ho#se. My famly came wth ther famly and we
contn#ed on sharn% almost everythn%. B#t of co#rse$ wth almost two years of sharn% each
other2s possessons even when sometmes we don2t share the same deas$ we had conflcts.
4nd so as soon as the chan%e n my #ncle2s ho#se was completed$ hs famly went "ac! to ther
own home and my mother decded that we shall not share wth them anymore. ,e contn#ed
o#r stay n that rented ho#se at Rose street$ three streets away from *ampa%#ta street where
my #ncle2s famly s now stayn%. ,e started lvn% on o#r own and t was l"eratn%. &he sharn%
system was %one$ e'cept the sharn% system n o#r "ed$ "#t at least we already had a "edroom
and we do not sleep n the lvn% room anymore.
,hen I reached 16 years old$ we transferred to another ho#se for a reason I cannot
remem"er anymore. ,e transferred to a ho#se .#st aro#nd the corner of my 0ncle (epn%2s
ho#se. &he ho#se has a small lvn% room that we com"ned wth o#r dnn% room$ across the
lvn%7dnn% room s the only comfort room$ stra%ht thro#%h the lvn%7dnn% room s an elevated
part whch s o#r !tchen and at ts corner s o#r la#ndry area. ,e had one med#m-szed room
where we stoc!ed #p all the thn%s that doesn2t ft n o#r lvn%7dnn% room or !tchen. It s also n
ths room where the fo#r of #s shared one mattress eno#%h for a pette mother and 3 lttle %rls
wth a%es 16$ 8 and 9 respectvely.
It s only d#rn% ths tme when I learned that my mother was act#ally not n %ood terms
wth my 0ncle (epn% and 4#nt *aln% #ntl we went and lved wth them. My mother lved wth
them whle she was st#dyn% #ntl she met my father and she decded to "e wth hm. My #ncle
and a#nt were a%anst ther relatonshp and so they told my mother to choose f she wll %o wth
my father or f she wll stay wth them. If she chooses to %o wth my father$ she wll not "e
welcome n my #ncle and a#nt2s ho#se anymore. It was a dffc#lt choce "#t my mother chose
to %o wth my father. B#t as t t#rns o#t$ he s not a respons"le h#s"and and father. 4nd so my
mother decded to stop dependn% on hm and leave hm to rase the three of #s "y herself. Of
co#rse she needed help to start a%an and she co#ldn2t thn! of other people to %o to "#t my
#ncle and a#nt. :ort#nately$ despte all the drama$ they accepted #s and helped #s. I was not
very happy wth the sharn% system that we had wth them$ "#t after !nown% ths$ I was very
than!f#l that despte all that happened they stll shared what they have wth #s.
,hen I entered h%h school$ we transferred to the #nt "esde o#r ho#se$ wthn the same
apartment. ,e transferred there "eca#se we can have a separate lvn% room and dnn% room$
tho#%h we were stll cramped wthn one "edroom. )avn% my own "edroom$ d#rn% that tme$
wo#ld have "een nce$ "#t may"e I am stll not ready to mana%e a room of my own. ,th all my
loaded school wor!s$ may"e I wo#ld only fll my room wth cl#tter and ths wll .#st add to my
mother2s stress. B#t t wo#ld have "een nce to act#ally e'perence t.
&he owner of the apartment was plannn% to m%rate to the 0nted *tates so they sold the
apartment and we had no choce "#t to transfer to another ho#se. ,e %ot the ho#se "esde a
store .#st aro#nd the corner of Orchds street$ the street where o#r prevo#s apartment stood.
,e have "een nsde a lot of ho#ses "#t we always ma!e s#re that we lve near o#r relatves$
especally my 0ncle (epn%2s ho#se. 4ll of o#r relatves n Mar!na lve wthn Baran%ay
+an%!a$ so that s o#r lmt n terms of fndn% a new ho#se to lve n. *o when we had to
transfer to another ho#se a%an and we co#ld not fnd an avala"le apartment wthn my #ncle2s
s#"dvson$ we had no choce "#t transfer to another s#"dvson. ,e went to ;reenhe%hts
s#"dvson whch s .#st "efore (ermalne )omes *#"dvson. ,e stll made s#re that the
relatves that we !now were wthn o#r reach "eca#se "esdes them$ we are very far from o#r
other relatves or worse$ we don2t !now them. 4ltho#%h we have o#r lvn% room$ dnn% room
and "edroom as one$ at least we are stll near o#r "eloved relatves.
,e have always chan%ed ho#ses snce we frst went here to Mar!na and started a new
lfe. ,e have "een to dfferent envronments and we have !nown dfferent sets of ne%h"o#rs
"#t two thn%s never chan%ed. &he frst one s that we are always near o#r relatves and the
second one s that we always shared the same "edroom. ,e were always near o#r relatves
"eca#se there wll "e tme when we wll "e needn% help and they wll not "e very far away. ,e
always shared the same "edroom "eca#se that s what o#r "#d%et allows #s. )o#ses wth more
than one "edroom are defntely m#ch more e'pensve and as m#ch as we wo#ld want to$ we
co#ld not afford them.
I wonder why are these !nds of ho#ses are m#ch more e'pensve< ,hy can we not
afford them< ,hy s havn% the freedom allowed "y one2s own room #nafforda"le for me< 4m I
that dependent to my famly<
It wo#ld have "een "etter f sharn% the same "edroom ens#res a "etter "ond wthn o#r
famly. B#t +o. 4ltho#%h there were no vs"le walls "etween #s$ we were dvded "y o#r own
respons"ltes o#tsde the ho#se. My mother s "#sy "en% the acco#ntn% staff at her company$
I am "#sy "en% an honor st#dent n 4teneo$ my yo#n%er sster s "#sy "en% the performn%
arts st#dent n her h%h school and my yo#n%est sster s "#sy "en% a %ood st#dent to her
%rade school teachers. ,e are so m#ch preocc#ped wth o#r own lves o#tsde o#r home that
when we %o "ac! nsde$ we stll thn! a"o#t the o#tsde and we sometmes wsh to .#st stay
o#tsde and not %o nsde "eca#se "en% nsde only %ves #s more stress. ,e are m#ch more
stressed "y o#r respons"ltes nsde o#r home than o#r respons"ltes o#tsde. 4nd ths s the
ca#se of all o#r =#arrels and ms#nderstandn%s. 4nd altho#%h we always sleep to%ether$ we %o
on wth o#r lves ndvd#ally. ,e sleep wth o#r "ac!s t#rned a%anst each other.
>espte ths st#aton$ there s always one thn% that we all a%ree a"o#t and that s havn%
o#r own ho#se someday$ havn% o#r own "edrooms someday. May"e what we all need s
prvate space and tme amon%st o#rselves n o#r own "edrooms$ so that when we meet n the
lvn% room or n the dnn% room$ we are settled and peacef#l wthn o#rselves$ so that we do
not clash o#r personal ss#es wth o#r famly ss#es$ so that we wll have tme to "reath. *o that
we wll have tme "reathe wthn o#r own walls$ wndows and door. *o that we wll have tme to
"reathe "etween the personal thn%s and applances that we have arran%ed "y o#r own.
Beca#se n lvn% wthn the same walls all the tme$ every day$ forces each one of #s to conform
to a set of r#les "ro#%ht a"o#t "y the way n whch everythn% was arran%ed for every"ody. I
may not want my "oo!s m'ed wth my sster2s "oo!s "#t I have no choce "eca#se I do not
have my own space. My ssters may not want the decoraton I p#t on the wall$ "#t they wll have
to "ear wth t "eca#se we have no choce "#t to loo! at the same wall. )avn% o#r own
"edrooms allows #s to have prvate moments$ "eca#se tho#%h we are a famly$ we stll have o#r
personal matters that we cannot readly share wth each other. )avn% no personal spaces of
o#r own creates conflcts "etween #s.
May"e the sol#ton of the loose "nd "etween my famly s each of #s havn% a room of o#r
own$ "#t may"e we really have to wor! hard and e'ert an effort n #nderstandn% each other.
May"e t2s not a"o#t the rooms n o#r ho#se$ may"e t s a"o#t the rooms and spaces n o#r
hearts that we allot for o#r famly. May"e we cannot afford to have a ho#se wth rooms of o#r
own so that we wll learn to #nderstand each other. 4nd o#r dream of havn% o#r own ho#se and
"edrooms of o#r own comes wth o#r dream that there wll come a tme when we wll "e ready
to "e separated from each other "eca#se we have learned to apprecate and val#e each other.