Kidnapped

I was kidnapped. Those Idiots. They f*cking got the wrong girl!


Ms. Byun.

I groaned in annoyance and bought my pillow tighter against my ear. Well obviously if youre
not such of an idiot, I dont want to get up yet. Well its not my fault that I got a hangover from
yesterdays party okay? And for the record, its 3 in the afternoon, like who the hell wakes you
up that early?!

I snuggled closer to my pillow and put my leg on it. I heard her moan, displeased with my
behavior, psh. Anong bago?

Baekhyun. I stirred. Call me what ever bitch. Im not getting up.

PUTANGINA MO BEKYUN DI KA BA TALAGA BABANGON HA?! Kyungsoo screamed bloody
murder and I winced. Etong gagong to, she doesnt have a high pitch voice but if he screams like
that, parang pinutukan ka ng baril sa tenga.

I slowly and mockingly sat up and rubbed my eyes, I opened it and saw Kyungsoo standing
beside my bed, glaring down at me with her hands on her hips and one eyebrow raised. Geez, I
really need to pluck the shit out of that caveman eyebrows.

Yeah bitch. Thank you for waking me up. Really. I said to my mother. Yeah, shes my mother
and yeah I called her bitch, but really, who cares? She even screamed putangina like she was
just screaming just peanut butter and jelly but hey, normal lang naman samin to.

Fuck you Baek, I know Im a classy and bitchy mother so no need to give me compliments early
in the morning, but you need to get out the fuck out of that bed. NOW. She said with authority,
but as her daughter, lahat alam ko basta wag lang sa pagsunod ng nanay ko. I dont know, I enjoy
pushing her buttons.

I just blankly stared at her hiding my amusement with her reaction like she just saw me grow
out 8 legs.

What?! Titigan mo na lang bako gamit ng mata mo?! sabi niya, her eyes wide open which is
freakingly normal like always. I tried not to laugh and sarcastically answered.

Aba, magulat ka kung titigan kita gamit ng ilong ko.

Oh god. Why do I have a very stupid and sarcastic daughter. She dramatically said and put her
hand on her chest like she was pained with my remark.

Uhh- mom no. Im not sarcastic, thank you very much. Im just intelligent beyond your
understanding.

Okay! Thats it! Jongin! Get your fat ass up in here! she called my father. My father came
bursting out of the door in seconds wearing a black suit and a tie. Hey, my ass is not fat and you
damn well know that dear. Okay my fathers hot alright and I cant believe I just fucking said
that, but sadly, its true. Well its clearly obvious, sa trabaho niya lahat na lang ata ng linta na
pwede dumikit eh umaaligid sa kanya.

One time, my mom and I visited his office and theres this girl na lumapit kay Dad and gave her
flirty stares, even winked at him and for a second, her eyes looked more like twitching because
of some grave eye illness because the stupid slut cant wink. I blinked momentarily and when I
opened my eyes, my mother was already chocking the shit out of her like a mad buffalo and I
stood there, took out my phone and recorded the whole commotion with my Iphone while my
father and the other employees tried to separate them both. The next time you come any closer
to my fcking stupid husband, I swear! Im going to shove my vibrator down your throat! moms
voice echoed down the whole building surprising everyone with her say, and just like that, my
fathers priceless face made my day. Its not like everyday you see your mother choke the shit
out of a girl who tried to flirt with your father right? And blurted out about her vibrator even.

Whats the matter? dad asked my mom as he put her hands on her waist and gave her a wet
kiss.

Oh gosh thats gross. I muttered under my breath, shaking my head in disapproval. I cant
afford to watch a porno this early in the morning, more importantly a porno by my parents!
LIKE WHO THE FCK DOES THAT?!

Whats the matter?! she pushed my father aside and smoke came out of his ears, any minute
now my mother would grow out a tail and horns. THE RESULT OF MY EGG CELL AND YOUR
SPERM CELL! Thats the matter! my mom blurted out.

My eyes widened at her sudden outburst, more because of her choice of words. Now thats just
really fucking gross!

MOM! SERIOUSLY?! KYUNGSOO! my father and shouted at the same time in disbelief.
Oh? So its my fault now?! You! she pointed at my fathers face and his face turned pale and
sweat came streaming down on his forehead, he was clearly holding his breath. Its hard to
control not to laugh with his face but if do that anytime now Im sure that my firm ass will end
up in the streets. Fix this! and she left the room and my father let out a heavy sigh. I laughed
my heart out hanggang sa sumakit yung tiyan ko.

Baekhyun. Why do you keep on pushing your mothers buttons? You know that she turns into a
madwoman when you do that.

Why? I like pushing her buttons. Its fun dad, why dont you try it? I asked him as he sat down
on my bed. My dad and I are close, daddys girl ako and lagi niya na lang ako spinospoil so hes
the best alright.

Oh believe me. I pushed enough of her buttons. My dad said and winked at me. I grimaced in
disgust at his statement, grossed out at the thought my dad and mom- oh fck, for the love of
heavens, disturbing mental images get out of my head.

Fck, Dad, Thats not a very appropriate thing to say to your beautiful and innocent daughter.

Youre not innocent, stop acting like it Baek. Im telling you young lady, if you let anyone get in
your pants, Im going to beat the shit out of you regardless that youre my daughter,
understood? he warned me, turning from the pervert dad into the responsible dad. I rolled my
eyes because it seriously doesnt fit him well.

Youre not responsible, stop acting like it Jongin. I reflected his words earlier and he just
laughed, not minding that I just called him by his name, yeah, were the family that put the awe
in awesome. I smiled and he patted my head like he used to do when I was a kid, I wasnt
innocent like a kid though.

Yeah yeah, you little shit just get your ass up. Dad said as he headed out for the door. I got up
tapos kinuha ko yung towel ko, my head was throbbing but a shower would do good.

Oh, Baek?

Yes dad?

Happy 17th birthday. I stopped in my tracks upon hearing those words. Im seriously not
touched or dramatically surprised if thats what you thought. Wow. Its my birthday? I hurriedly
got my phone and saw the date. Oh gosh, it really is my birthday? Alcohol doesnt make people
stupid right?

I tilted my head and gave my father a disapproving look.

What?

Thats all? Wheres my pink Chihuahua? I told him and crossed my arms against my chest and
cocked my eyebrows

Honey, theres no such thing as a pink Chihuahua, not my concern anyway. Didnt you saw the
sports car parked outside? he smiled and my eyes showed a glint of excitement. A FUCKING
SPORTS CAR?! My dad bought me a sports car?! I hurriedly peeked out of the window and saw a
pink fucking hot expensive looking sports car outside the house.

I squealed in never ending happiness and ran towards my father to give him a tight hug.
Overwhelmed with the thought of me getting my hands on that car.

Did I ever mentioned that youre the best dad in the whole-

Yeah, I bought you slippers with the same color. He chuckled and just like that, my dreams
came tumbling towards despair. My face fell down while my father left the room chuckling.

FUCK YOU DAD! Ugh!