Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day

Teach him to use the Internet, and he won't bother you for weeks!
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Nothing is particularly hard if you divide it into small jobs!
Henry Ford(1863-1947)
American founder of The Ford Motor Company
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The robb'd that smiles steals something from the thief
William Shakespeare(1564-1616)
English Poet and playwright
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An old man is sitting on a park bench crying his eyes out. A young jogger comes
by and asks him what is the matter.
The old man says, "I'm a multilillionaire, I have a great big house, the fastest
car in the world and I just married a beautiful blonde bombshell(sob)."
The young jogger says, "Man, you have everything I have ever dreamed for in my l
ife. What could be so wrong in your life that you are sitting here in the park c
rying?"
The old man says, "I can't remember where I live."
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Grwing older is mandatory, growing up is optional
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All our life is a way from birth to death
It's sad, isn't it?
but It's true
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FOR SALE BY OWNER
Complete set of encyclopedia Britannica, 45 volums. Excellent condition
$ 1000 pound or best offer
Reason for sale: No longer required. Got married last weekend. Wife knows everyt
hing
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The harder you work, the harder it is to surrender
Vince Lombardi(1913-1970)
American football coach
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Why are mathematicians afraid to drive a car?
Because the width of the road is negligible comparing to its length
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Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.
Albert Einstein(1879-1955)
German-born theoretical physicist
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Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor
Truman Capote(1924-1984)
American writer
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success does not consist in never making mistakes but in never making the same o
ne a second time.
George Bernard Shaw(1856-1950)
Irish playwright
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A man pulls up to the curb and asks the policeman, "Can I park here?"
"No," says the cop
"What about all those other cars?"
"They didn't ask!"
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Tech Support : What does the screen say now?
Person: It says "Hit ENTER when ready".
Tech Support: Well?
Person: How do I know when it's ready?
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"Jimmy! I thought I told you to do the dishes after you do your homework! why ar
e you watching television?"
"It's okay, Mom! I haven't done my homework yet."
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