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T ransl at ion and not es 1 C 1 965 Simon Wat son T ayl or
I nt rodu c t ion C 1 965 Roger Shal l u c k
Original l y pu bl ished in Selemd Wor ks of AI ,fr edJ ar r y
T his edit ion 1 996 Exac t C hange
Pu bl ished by arrangement wit h Grove Press, I nc
Al l Right s Reserved
I SBN 1 - 878972- 07- 3
C over phot ograph: The Lmely Metr opolitan, by Herbert Bayer, 1 93 2
Reprodu c ed by permission of t he MI T Press
Exac t C hange books at e edit ed by Damon Kru kowski
and designed by Naomi Yang
Exac t C hange
P.O . Box 1 91 7
Bost on, MA 02205
Print ed on ac id- free rec yc l ed paper
CONTENTS
I ntr oduct;o' l by Roger Shattuck. . VI I
BOOK ONE: PROC EEDI NGS
I Su mmons pu rsu ant t o art ic l e 81 9. . 5
2 C onc erning t he habit s and bearing of Doc t or Fau st rol l . . . 7
:S Servic e of Writ . . 9
4 C onc erning t he equ ival ent books of Doc t or Fau st rol L. .. 1 0
, Not ic e of warrant enabl ing immediat e sal e. . 1 3
6 C onc erning t he Doc t or's boat , whic h is a sieve. . 1 4
7 C onc erning t he c hosen few. 1 7
BOOK T WO: ELEl 'l ENT S OF PAT APHYSI C S
Ii Definit ion ..... 21
\) Fau st rol l smal l er t han Fau st rol l . .. 24
I \I C onc erning t he dogfac ed baboon Bosse- de- Nage, who knew no
hu man words bu t "ha ha"..... 26
BOOK T HREE: FROl 'l PARI S T O PARI S BY SEA
OR T HE BELGI AN FAMI LY ROBI NSON
I I C onc erning t he embarkat ion in t he ark. . 3 0
I J C onc erning t he Squ it t y Sea, t he ol fac t ory l ight hou se, and t he isl e
of C ac k, where we drank nor. .. 3 2
I \ C onc erning t he l and of Lac e. . 3 5
I I C onc erning t he forest of Love ..... 3 6
I i C Ol l c erning t he great st airc ase of bl ac k marbl e ..... 40
I r. C onc erning t he Amorphou s isl e 41
1 7 C onc erning t he Fragrant isl e 43
, , . C onc erning t he C ast l e- Errant , whic h is a ju nk. .... 45
II) C (l I I c erning t he isl e of Pt yx ..... 47
.il l C onc c rning t he isl e of Her, t he C yc l ops, and t he great swan
whic h is of c ryst al . . 48
C Ol l c erning t he isl e of C yril . .... 51
C onc c rning t he great c hu rc h of Snou t figs ..... 53
'"
'!';!f.I;'~"!;~' " ;., .r ;, .".'
.. , \ ~, .... ; .
23 C onc erning t he Ringing isl e. . 56
24 C onc erning t he hermet ic Shades and t he king who await ed deat h. 59
BO O K FO UR: CEPHALO RGY
25 C onc erning t he l and- t ide and t he marine bishop Mendac iou s. . 62
26 Drink 65
27 C apit al l y 68
28 C onc erning t he deat h of a nu mber of peopl e, and more espec ial l y
ofBosse- de- Nage ..... 71
29 C onc erning some fu rt her and more evident meanings of
t he words "ha ha"..... 74
3 0
3 1
3 2
BO O K FIVE: O FFICIALLY
C onc erning a t hou sand varied mat t ers. . . 77
C onc erning t he mu sic al jet . . . 81
How one obt ained c anvas ..... 83
3 3
34
BO O K SIX: A VISIT TO LUCULLUS
C onc erning t he t ermes ..... 87
C l inamen. .. . 88
3 5
3 6
BO O K SEVEN: KHURMO O KUM
C onc erning t he great ship Mou r- de- Zenc l e. . . 95
C onc erning t he l ine. . . 98
3 7
3 8
3 9
40
41
BO O K EIGHT: ETHERNITY
C onc erning t he measu ring rod, t he wat c h and t he t u ning fork. . .. 1 00
C onc erning t he su n as a c ool sol id. 1 05
Ac c ording t o I bic rat es t he Geomet er ..... 1 07
Pant aphysic s and C at ac hemy ..... 1 1 0
C onc erning t he su rfac e of God. . .. 1 1 1
Notes by Simol l Watson Taylor .
Bibliogr aphy by Alastair Br otchie.
1 1 5
_ . _ 1 3 7
BY ROGER SHAT T UC K
[ I I E A VANT - GAR D E t heat er of t he t went iet h c ent u ry keeps
U K one of it s c onvenient referenc e point s t he expl osive gener ale of
III", lioi in 1 896. T hat performanc e expl oit ed ingredient s t hat have
hl 'fome c ommonpl ac e t oday, from barefac ed sl apst ic k t o t he
., , "det ies of t he absu rd. Al fred J arry (1 873 - 1 907), princ ipal au t hor
fl l l l l sol e promot er of t his sc hool boy mast erpiec e, c ame c l ose t o
1 1 I q, sc du ring t he t hirt y- year sc u ffl e of l it erary movement s t hat
j"l I owed his premat u re deat h. T he t emporary ec l ipse oc c u rred
dl '"pit c t ribu t e t o his geniu s from Apol l inaire, Max J ac ob, Bret on,
t l l l u c i, Qu eneau , and even Gide. Bu t t he midget J arry, ec c ent ric
III Ihe point of mania and l u c id t o t he point of hal l u c inat ion, was
U~I I Ot iC t o l ie l ow for l ong. T oday he is very mu c h wit h u s again.
T he original l egend c ent ered abou t his at t ire (a c yc l ist 's c os-
III"'" wi, h pist ol s), his habit s (drink prac t ic ed as disc ipl ine), his
1 , , , lw"H (a dark c el l l it eral l y on t he sec ond- and- a- hal f fl oor). and
III. d"il y f."e (fish he c au ght at wil l anywhere in t he Seine). I n pu b-
1 1 0 iI, , you ng u pst art pu ffed himsel f u p t o t he proport ions of Ubu ,
Vl l
:", .~., _ ...."T~:, , :: .:.. '.~ ~4;";:'
the human blunderbuss who smashed all histo ry as he went. But
the artist in Jarry co ntinued to be preco cio us and hid rather than
reveal ed it sel f in t his hypert rophied biography. T here is mu c h
more t o him t han t he l ong remembered sc andal s of Ubu . Lit t l e
wo nder that since the seco nd Wo rld War Jarry's reputatio n has
enjo yed a spirited revival in France. His wo rks have been co llected
and republished in eight vo lumes, new writings disco vered, his
career and talent reexamined, and a Co llege de 'Pataphysique
fo unded to perpetuate his inventio ns and destructio ns. In his
po sthumo us ascent to lasting literary esteem Jarry still co ntrives to
dismay readers in appro ximately the same pro po rtio n that he
impresses t hem. He wil l not be hel d at arm's l engt h.
*
The great po sthumo us wo rks in Western literature usually carry
with them a fundamental enigma. Pascal's Pensees and Rimbaud's
Illuminations raise pro blems o f chro no lo gy and interpretatio n, as
well as making their o wn particular challenges to the very idea o f
l it erat u re. J arry wou l d have gu ffawed and fou nd a su it abl e blague
t o dismiss t his grandiose approac h t o his book, Exploits and
Opinions of Doctor Faustr oll, Pataphysician. Yet aft er having fail ed
to find a publisher fo r mo re than a few chapters, he entrusted at
least two manuscripts o f the text to reliable friends, and inscribed
one of t hem for post erit y. At t went y- five J arry su ggest ed he was
Viti
wrmtlg o ver everyo ne's head, including his o wn; he had to
OIcxperience"death in o rder to catch up with himself.
Fallstroll reveals its enigmatic qualities mo st clearly in co ntrast
{() Ubll Roi, Ubll Enchaine, and Ubu Cocu. In the nineties Ubu's
f"l.'cwheeling and ado lescent nihilism was received with a rauco us
1I'lxtureo f ho o ts and cheers in the audito rium as in the press. Yet
It W: lS received. Fatts/roll, even tho ugh a few fragments appeared in
till' Mercure de France in May, 1895, enco untered o nly silence and
IOl\-'nsyrejectio n by the two edito rs mo st devo ted to Jarry's wo rk.
I 'his time he appeared to have attempted to o much. In a gro tesque
.yrnmctry, Faustroll mo ves in the o ppo site directio n fro m the Ubu
"IllY, and forms t heir c ompl ement _ Beneat h t he highl y c ongest ed
.1 1 rf'nc c , and in spite o f its desulto ry structure, o ne senses in
/ " t / l l a r o l l the search fo r a new reality, a stupendo us effo rt to create
'"" or t he ru ins Ubu had l eft behind a new syst em of val u es - t he
, , ", l t l of pat aphysic s. Beneat h t he dou bl e t al k and el l ipsis, it s for-
Hili! dcFinitio n (see pp. 21-23) seems to mean that the virtual o r
hliligillary nature o f things as glimpsed by the heightened visio n o f
1'"I'II'yo r science o r lo ve can be seized and lived as real. This is
,h i' ultimate fo rm o f "authentic enactment.))
I r mathematics is the dream o f science, ubiquity ( s i c ) the dream
lei IIHlrtality, and po etry the dream o f speech, pataphysics fuses
!lII'1 1 i Into the "co mmo n sense" o f Do cto r Faustro ll, who lives all
d""ilns : IS o ne. Jarry reco ums the miraculo us tale in an utterly
11111'/ ' nnd scientific manner, and pursues his analyses with such
l X
~or- """;
', ' ..
:- :";
rigor and at t ent ion t o det ail t hat we l ose sight of t he c onvent ional
bou ndary bet ween real it y and hal l u c inat ion. A c harac t er in anot her
work of J arry's assert s: "I c an see al l possibl e worl ds when I l ook
at onl y one of t hem. God - or mysel f - c reat ed al l possibl e
worl ds, t hey c oexist , bu t men c an hardl y gl impse even one"
(Caesar -Antichr ist)_ Unl ike t he dest ru c t ive and u nfeel ing Ubu ,
Fau st rol l wel c omes and expl ores al l forms of exist enc e.
I n t he Mer cur e de Fr ance Apol l inaire hail ed t he first edit ion of
Exploits and Opinions of Doctor Faustr oll, Pataphysician: "It is t he
most import ant pu bl ic at ion of 1 91 1 ." I n 1 923 t he su rreal ist ,
Phil ippe Sou pau l t , prefac ed t he sec ond edit ion by insist ing on it s
u ndiminished import anc e and affirming t he geniu s of bot h J arry's
l ife and his writ ings. Aft er t wo more Frenc h edit ions, t his t ransl a-
t ion c ompl et es t he c yc l e. J arry's work appears in Engl ish at a
moment when t he at omic and spac e revol u t ions (pl u s ru mors of
ant i- mat t er and spl it t ing t ime) have endowed Fau st rol l 's fant ast ic
voyages wit h somet hing approac hing pl au sibil it y.*
T he hist ory of t he work hel ps t o il l u minat e it s rec esses. Like
t he Ubu c yc l e, it s origins go bac k t o t he [yete in Rennes where J arry
and his sc hool mat es fou nd a ready t arget for t heir overc harged
imaginat ions in t he figu re of Professor Hebert . His sc ient ific
demonst rat ions were as renowned and as ineffec t u al as his c l ass-
room disc ipl ine. I n a series of l egendary farc es he bec ame "I e pere
.
A few sent enc es l ike t hese refl ec t t he c omposit ion of t he I nt rodu c t ion in 1 965 to ac c ompany t he
original pu bl ic at ion of Simon W at son T ayl or's t ransl at ion. T heir al l u sions t o event s of t he sixt ies
do not affec t t he pu rport of my c omment s. I n any c ase, J arry revel ed in anac hronisms.
x
Hh~, " kept al ive and rec hrist ened by J arry, and final l y broken over
till' heads of t he Paris pu bl ic at t he T heat re de 1 '(Eu vre aft er an
l I u l 'emit t ing c ampaign. Professor Hebert 's c al amit ou s "sc ienc e of
I I I , ys;c s" yiel ded "pat aphysic s, " t reasu red and devel oped by J arry.
f~'w years aft er l eaving t he lyete, he annou nc ed for pu bl ic at ion a
(/l,t/tise on ' Pataphysics. Bu t before it appeared, t he t reat ise c om-
I """d wit h t wo fu rt her ideas whic h modified J arry's original
I ! l oic et . T he first was t o c reat e a c ast of c harac t ers t o inc arnat e,
I "ne! ic e, and expou nd t he new sc ienc e. Al ong wit h an array of
1 1 1 .~l 'I 'personages most of whom appear onl y in t he one "expl oit "
III I 'hnpt er devot ed t o t hem, we fol l ow t he c ent ral figu re of Doc t or
I '"'~l rol l and his t wo at t endant s: t he bail iff, Panmu phl e, bot h pu r-
'1 1 '" rind prisoner of Fau st t ol l , and t he monosyl l abic dogfac ed
I "dl l , on, Bosse- de- Nage (l it eral l y, "bot t om- fac e"). Many of
I ", , ;I I 'OI l 'S ac t ions c an be at t ribu t ed equ al l y t o a God- l ike knowl -
I I J I HI ' or t he workings of t he u niverse * and t o an effervesc ent
1 ""k"h enjoyment of l ife,
'['he sec ond idea whic h modified t he original t reat ise was t o
!tI!lPI t he l oose narrat ive form of an indefinit el y renewed jou rney
III l il u l 'vc l ou s l ands - a form whic h served Homer and Rabel ais,
IllltiliH ot hers. T hu s in t he very st ru c t u re of his t reat ise- novel J arry
, u , , 'il ed a t ot al l ibert y t o broac h any su bjec t : Fau st rol l simpl y
"'! l VI 'S 01 1 at wil l t o anot her t ime andl or pl ac e. J arry c al l ed t his
.h.J 1 1 1 , ( 1 ~:1 C hriHl an, Fau st rol l repl ies; "I 20m God." (p. 3 7)
x ,
I ". ' :. ,. , ~;,;' ,~
"
l it erary hybrid a "neo- sc ient ific novel ." I n a l at er art ic l e he su g-
gest ed t he t erm "hypot het ic al novel " t o desc ribe a c l ass of works
from Ar abian Nights to t he novel s of Vil l iers de l 'l sl e- Adam and
H. G. Wel l s - works whic h do not c onfine t heir ac t ions t o t he
"real " worl d. Any su mmary of J arry's novel mu st remain highl y
hypot het ic aL
Doc t or Fau st rol l is du nned for bac k rent by t he bail iff
Panmu phl e, who invent ories and seizes his l ibrary of
"t went y- seven equ ival ent books." (BOOK ONE)
T he el ement s of pat aphysic s are briefl y set down and
il l u st rat ed by an experimenr in rel at ivit y and su rfac e
t ension. (BOOK T WO)
Doc t or Fau st rol l esc apes t he l aw in a skiff or sieve
whic h t ravel s on bot h l and and wat er. He is ac c ompanied
by t he baboon, Bosse- de- Nage, as navigat or, and by
Panmu phl e, t amed by drink and c hained t o his seat , as
oarsman and narrat or u nt il t he next t o l ast book. T heir
peregrinat ions c arry t hem t o fou rt een l ands or isl ands,
whose t opography and inhabit ant s are so desc ribed as t o
c onvey J arry's c omment s on fou rt een friends (or enemies)
in t he worl d of t he art s - among t hem, Au brey Beardsl ey,
Leon Bl oy, Gau gu in, Gu st ave Kahn, Mal l arme, Henri de
Regnier, and Marc el Sc hwob. (BOOK T HREE)
Aft er fu rt her navigat ions, disc u ssions, and a great
banqu et , Fau st rol l disc ou rses on deat h and st art s a hol o-
c au st in whic h Bosse- de- Nage perishes - provisional l y.
X I I
His monosyl l abic and al l - su ffic ing l angu age ("Ha ha") is
c arefu l l y anal yzed, (SOOK FOUR)
Aft er a c oprol ogic al aside on t he "l egl ess c rippl e"
whorepresent s Pierre Lot i, Fau st rol l pu t s Henri Rou sseau
in c harge of a "paint ing mac hine" t o "embel l ish" t he ac a-
demic c anvases hanging in t he Lu xembou rg Mu seu m.
(BOOK FI VE)
Whil e Fau st rol l has an erot ic advent u re, t he paint ing
mac hine u nder t he Lu c ret ian name of C l inamen exec u t es
t hirt een paint ings, eac h desc ribed in a short prose poem.
(BOOK SI X )
Fau st rol l dies by drowning aft er sinking t he skiff t o
avoid c ol l ision, and his body, l ike a t ight sc rol l u nfu rl ed
by t he wac er, reveal s t he fu t u re in it s spiral s. (BOOK
SEVEN)
T he final book, ent it l ed "Et hernit y, " resu mes t he
t reat ise on pat aphysic s begu n in BOOK T WO. T wo t el e~
pat hic l et t ers front Fau st rol ! t o Lord Kel vin regarding t he
l at t er's experiment s in measu rement , mat t er, and l ight ,
are fol l owed by a c rowning pat aphysic al disc ou rse on
rhe "su rfac e" and nat u re of God. I n ac c u rat e geomet ric al
t heorems He is demonst rat ed t o be "t he t angent ial point
bet ween zero and infinit y." (BOOK EI GHT )
"~r"Y writ es in a highl y c ompressed, poet ic , oft en moc k- heroic
I I I tHoll' t hat requ ires c arefu l reading. Yet t he sent enc es move at
l , rJ l t l l ong speed and draw t he reader u nexpec t edl y int o t he ac t ion.
X I I I
lIIIJ III", IIIIIJ 1 1 i"''''''. ;if;'ljt!o~~\ .:~ , ~~~, ~-, ;:
, .. ~; ..
One vac il l at es bet ween amu sement , pu zzl ement , irrit at ion, and
ast onishment at J arry- Fau st roI l 's c aval ier t reat ment of t he worl d
and of words. I n t his t ransl at ion by Simon Wat son T ayl or, pro-
vided wit h his c opiou s not es, t he work bec omes al most more
readabl e in Engl ish t han in rhe Frenc h edirions, many of whic h are
not el ess and fu l l of annoying misprint s.
T here is a fu rt her aspec t of t he book, however, whic h is l ess
immediat el y apparent t han it s st yl ist ic c harac t erist ic s and whic h
est abl ishes it as a singu l arl y ric h hist oric al doc u menr. (Not hing is
inc omparibl e wit h pat aphysic s.) Writ ing rwo years before t he c l ose
of t he ninet eent h c ent u ry, J arry seized several of it s most c harac -
t erist ic yet most c ont radic t ory l ines of devel opment and disc overed
_ by c reat ing ir himsel f - t heir point of c onvergenc e. Wit h t he
great est of gl ee he grasped t he sc ient ific t radit ion; not , signifi-
c ant l y, as represent ed by Past eu r or Poinc are or C u rie or even
by his former t eac her Bergson, bu t as he c ame u pon it in t he
exc ept ional generat ion of c ont emporary Engl ish sc ient ist s: Sir
Wil l iam T homson (Lord Kel vin), C l erk Maxwel l , Sir Wil l iam
C rookes, Art hu r C ayl ey, and C . Y. Boys. T heir works appeared
in Frenc h edit ions in t he ninet ies when J arry was st il l c onsidering
a sc ient ific c areer. T hese invest igat ors, as mu c h in t he l ine of
Dodgson- C arrol l (mat hemat ic ian t u rned writ er) as of Newt on
(physic ist t u rned t heol ogian), al l displ ayed a high degree of ec c en-
t ric bril l ianc e and freedom t o roam among t he physic al sc ienc es.
Above al l , t hey performed what seemed t o be bizarre experiment s
XIV
wit h soap bu bbl es, gyrost at s, t iny boat s driven abou t in a basin by
i. nmphor, and simil ar t oys. T hey il l u st rat ed t heir t heories by
hypot hesizing mic rosc opic homu nc u l i l iving on c abbage l eaves
(C , 'ookes) or shoving mol ec u l es arou nd l ike st evedores (Maxwel l 's
I t Sort ing Demon"). For t hem as for l arry, sc ienc e was an adven-
t (I re, domest ic and t ransc endent .
Sc ienc e formed t he first st rand. Wit h more int ensit y t han gl ee,
Iu rry al so embrac ed t he symbol ist sc hool in l it erat u re and it s doc -
t l 'l l l es of su ggest ion and mu sic al it y. Symbol ism, in bot h t he
I ! pnc nl ypt ic version of Rimbau d and t he l apidary version of
Mnl l :l rme, c onju red u p it s u niverse ou t of words in new rel at ion-
.I "ps t o meanings, and J arry expl oit ed t his l ibert y t o t he fu l l . T he
tlH.'d signific ant st rand c ont ribu t ing t o t he su bst anc e of Faustr oll
1 ", , , 1 , bac k t o a frequ ent l y disdained aspec t of t he mood of t he t ime.
I" ... d, aret s l ike t he Chat Noir and l ivel y reviews l ike La Plume, a
'~IVIIHC and oft en grot esqu e sense of hu mor ru bbed shou l ders wit h
IIII' j', l l 'nest ness of symbol ism. T his was t he era of t he front - page
I ill ! non and t he wry c/' Tonique, one of J arry's part ic u l ar t al ent s. I n
I ,wl//,oll as in Ubu Cocu he pu shed his sense of t he c omic int o
till' 1 '('lIlm where l au ght er is mixed wit h apprehension for ou rsel ves.
1 1 1 1 'r;n~d st rand, l ess signific ant t han t he ot hers bu t wort h men-
HI I I I I I l H, is t he oc c u l t ist visionary revival . T hat mat erial ist ic age
I " , , ('l e1 l C e and progress su pport ed a fl ou rishing sideshow of
IIl1 tl"'IC c u l t s, from Rosic ru c ianism t o heral dry. T his fou rt h c om-
1.. IUilll!, however, is not so far afiel d from t he first as one might
XV
1 I!_.IIII!.""!iIi'I!I-~iflPIW "'."-'''~'' ' , , . -~, ~
.......
t hink, for t abl e t u rning at t rac t ed t he energies of sc ient ific researc h
as wel l as of spirit u al ist frau d.
Sc ienc e, symbol ism, hu mor, and t he oc c u l t - few writ ers have
at t empt ed t o c ompou nd su c h disparat e el ement s int o a singl e work,
as J arry himsel f knew. His onl y mast er was Rabel ais. T his eru dit e
freet hinking monk produ c ed ou t of his t eeming imaginat ion an
amal gam of t he ric hes of l ife in t he sixt eent h c ent u ry and wrot e a
book for al l t ime. Bu t t he c anons of l it erary t ast e as t hey have hard-
ened in t he t went iet h c ent u ry l eave l it t l e pl ac e for Rabel ais. A
t went iet h- c ent u ry Rabel ais st rikes one as even more prepost erou s,
and J arry wou l d have fou nd an au dienc e more readil y had he writ -
t en simpl y a work of sc ienc e fic t ion, a symbol ist narrat ive, a bawdy
t al e, or a spirit u al al l egory. I nst ead, Faustr oll is doing a nu mber of
t hings at t he same t ime.
From t he beginning, in t he nu merou s dedic at ions of sec t ions
and c hapt ers, one enc ou nt ers t he doc u ment ary and al l u sive aspec t
of t he work - it s ru nning c omment ary on t he l it erary figu res and
int el l ec t u al c u rrent s of t he t ime. T hou gh veil ed and indirec t , many
c hapt ers ac hieve a rare form of c rit ic ism. J arry's parodies met e ou t
bot h homage and sc u rril it y. On anot her l evel , Faustr oll c ont ains
t he spirit u al au t obiography of J arry, who in t he fl esh assu med t he
monst rou s rol e of Ubu bu t who sou ght in l it erat u re, in eru dit ion,
and in al c ohol his means of spirit u al el evat ion. I n t his l ight Faustr oll
is a novel of qu est wit hou t t he u su al not e of sel f- pit y. On t he t hird
l evel , and far more diffic u l t t han t he first t wo, one mu st measu re
d1 e l it erary val u e of t he book. Despit e J arry's su bt it l e, "a neo-
sc ient ific novel , " it fal l s int o no genre, not even t hat of t he
pic aresqu e novel or t he marvel t al e. He sac rific es al l u nit ies of
pl ot , of disc u rsive argu ment , of t ime and pl ac e, of c harac t er. I t s
u nit y of ac t ion in t he Arist ot el ian sense c onc erns t he man- god
I 'nu st rol l , t he wise bu ffoon, who su rvives his own deat h and c on-
! ! l l l ieS his t ravel s in t he "u nknown dimensions" of "et hernit y."
Bu t t his is al ready t he fou rt h and final l evel : t he sphere of
pu t nphysic s. What wou l d have been t he anagogic al or spirit u al sig-
I I dic ~nc e for medieval c omment at ors refers here t o a syst emat ic
loying wit h t he arrangement of t hings and t heir signific anc e u nt il
w,' , c e t he improbabl e hypot hesis as reaL From t his l evel of mean-
I I I K :1 nd c reat ion we final l y see t hat pat aphysic s c ont ains wit hin
Ihu l(, despit e u ndert ones of spoofing and qu ac kery, a c omment ary
HI I (he ot her l evel s of soc ial and hist oric al t ime, personal biogra-
I t hy, :I nd art ist ic val u e. T he ric hest c onc ept s in t he book arise
't\ IIi1 1 t he area of sc ient ific imaginat ion 0arry affirmed bl u nt l y t hat
till q' is no ot her kind), have t heir appl ic at ion in biographic al and
1 1 1 1 " l l l 'y spheres, and bec ome t he t enet s of pat aphysic s. T hree
HllIlIlplcs wil l show t he range of J arry's mind. T he ast ronomic al
II lin NyZygy (a c onju nc t ion or opposit ion of pl anet s in a sol ar
\"""") probabl y appeal ed t o him bec au se it su ggest s t hat some-
dHIlr\ Hkin t o c ryst al l ine form may emerge at int erval s ou t of t he
1 'l l I dl l 'l 1 movement s of t he c osmos; yet for J arry syzygy al so repre-
I III" J I , .... ru l e of prose st yl e t hat a word mu st t ransfix a moment ary
X Vl
X VI I
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- T HE BRl HAD A'RANYAKA UPANI SHAD
"T here are eight abodes, eight pl ac es of sight , eight
deit ies, and eight Pu ru shas. Whoever u nderst ands
t hose Pu ru shas in t heir division, and again in t heir
u nion, has overc ome t he worl d. I ask t hee abou t t he
Pu ru sha in t he Upanishads. And t hou expl ain not him
t o me, t hy head wil l faI t off." S'akal ya knew him not ,
so his head fel l off. Moreover robbers t ook away his
bones, mist aking t hem for somet hing el se.
."'_ , . , . " , , """"''"'" , '"" ", , '''T ", , , , .' " d
BO O K O NE
I P' IIU~C IEIEl I J ) [ Pi < G
SUMMO NS PURSUANT
TO ARTICLE 81 9
I N T Ii I S YEA R Eighteen Hundr ed and Ninety-eight, t he Eight h
. I "Y o(Febru ary, Pur suant to ar ticle 81 9 of the Code of Civil Pr ocedur e
, , , , , I , , / the r equest ofM, and Mme. Bonhomme Uac qu es), pr opr ietor s
1./ 1/ house situate at Paris, 100 bis, rue Richer 1 the aforementioned
h l/lflll8 lIddress for service at my residence and further at the To wn Hall
, .I () borou gh.
I. the under signed, Rene- I sidore Panmu phI e, Bailiff attached to
II" (;iI, if Cour t of Fir st I nstance of the Depar tment of Seine, in session
III/ l o r i s , residing i n said City, 37, rue Payee, Do hereby s u m m o n i n
,II,. " t/II/e of the LA W and of JUSTICE, Mo nsieur Faustro ll, do cto r,
'"hl,,( of various premises dependent upon the house aforementioned,
111,rlU/ 1-! (tl Paris, 100 bis, rue Richer, and having proceeded to the
,d.III'lncntioned ho use, bearing upon its exterior the number 100,
HullHlving rung, kno cked, and called the afo rementio ned vario usly
5
"., ''', :: .; , , , :::, .. , , . ". .,...
.. ~ .n ... ,
and successively, no perso n having o pened the do o r to us, and the
next do o r neighbo rs declaring to us that this is indeed the resi-
dence o f said M. Faustro ll, but that they were unwilling to accept
a co py o f this writ and, inasmuch as I did find at said premises nei-
ther relatio ns no r servants, no r any neighbo r willing to accept
service o f this present co py by subscribing to the o riginal thereto ,
I did proc eed fort hwit h t o t he T own Hal l of Qborou gh at whic h
pl ac e I did personal l y del iver t his present c opy t o his Worship t he
Mayo r, who did certificate the o riginal thereto ; within the maximum
per iod of twenty-four hour s, to pay to the claimant into my hands as ten-
der in full and valid quittance the sum of T hree Hu ndred and
Seventy-two t hou sand fr ancs 27 centimes, in respect of El even quarters
r ental of the afor ementioned pr emises due on the Firsr day of J anu ary
l ast , without pr ej udice to those subsequently falling due and to any and
all other rights, actions, interests, costs and distraint, declaring to the
aforementioned that failing satisfaction of this present Summons within
said per iod of time, he shall be constr ained ther eto by all lawful means,
and notably by the seizur e and impounding of such goods and chaltels
as may be pr esent on the pr emises leased. Wher efor e I did deposit this
pr esent copy of the for egoing at the pr emises afor esaid. Cost: el even
fr ancs 3 0centimes, including 1 1 2 sheet of special stamped paper at 0f r .
60 centimes.
PANMUPHLI ,
To Monsieur Faustroll, Doctor.
clo the Town Hall of Q boroug/l,
6
C ONC ERNI NG T HE HABI T S AND BEARI NG
OF DOC T OR FAUST ROl l
I )o no r Faustro ll was sixty-three years o ld when he was bo rn in
I'l I 'e, "sia in 1 898 (t he 20t h c ent u ry was [- 2] years ol d).
At t his age, whic h he ret ained al l his l ife, Doc t or Fau st rol l was
,L 1 1 \[1 1 1 o f medium height, o r, to be abso lutely accurate, o f (8 x
1 \1
'1 1
I 1 0
9
+ 4 x 1 0
8
+ 5 x 1 0
6
) at omic diamet ers; wit h a gol den-
\'L I/ OW skin, his face clean-shaven, apart fro m a few sea-green
IIIIINI flchio s, I as wo rn by king Saleh; the hairs o f his head alter-
"""'Iy pl at inu m bl onde and jet bl ac k, an au bu rn ambigu it y
L hllll~\ingacco rding to the sun's po sitio n; his eyes, two capsules o f
ILldlll.lrywriting-ink flecked with go lden spermato zo a like Danzig
/lL IIIU lpPS.
I Ie was beardless, apart fro m his mustachio s, thro ugh the judi-
I h U HI usc o f baldness micro bes which permeated his skin fro m the
II HII to the eyelashes and ate away all the fo llicles, witho ut any
1 1 1 1 Ii lor Fau st rol l t o fear t hat his sc al p- hair or eyebrows might fal l
ILtll1 /lILlCe these micro bes attacko nly fresh yo ung hairs. Fro m his
I LljL1 do wn co his feet, in co ntrast, he was sheathed in a satyric
ILLI! krut', fo r he was man to an impro per degree.
! 'hot morning he t ook his dail y sponge bat h' of t wo- t one wal l -
1 "'1 1 1 1 1 pninted by Maurice Denis, with a design o f trains climbing
7
", "~:r:'~'jJ l.;" 1 , , ' ~.- "
up spirals; a lo ng time ago he had given up water in favo r o f wall-
paper - seaso nable, fashio nable, o r acco rding to his whim.
So as no t to embarrass the po pulace, he drew o n o ver this
design a shirt made of qu arrz fiber; baggy t rou sers of du l l bl ac k
velvet drawn tight at the ankles; tiny little gray bo o ts, with even
layers o f dust carefully preserved o n them, at great expense, fo r
many mont hs past , broken onl y by t he dry geysers of ant - l ions; a
go lden-yello w silkwaistco at, exactly the same co lo r as his skin,
with no mo re butto ns than an undervest, and two rubies as butto ns
fo r the breast po ckets, very high up; and a greatco at lined with
bl u e fox fu r.
On his right index finger, he pil ed emeral d and t opaz rings
right u p t o t he fingernail - t he onl y one of t he t en whic h he did
no t bite - and the line o f rings was kept in place by a specially
designed l inc hpin made of mol ybdenu m, sc rewed int o t he bone 01
t he u ngu al phal anx, t hrou gh t he fingernail .
By way o f a tie, he passed aro und his neckthe ceremo nial rib-
bon of t he Great St ru mpot , ' an Order invent ed by himsel f and
patented to avo id any vulgarizatio n.
He hanged himsel f by t his ribbon on a spec ial l y c onst ru c t ed
gibbet, pro crastinating fo r a few quarter-ho urs between the chain'
of t he t wo asphyxiat ing make- u ps c al l ed white hanged man and blll' -
hanged man,
And, after cutting himself do wn, he put o n a so lar to pee.
8
SERVI C E OF WRI T
I N" 'I I S YEA R Eight een Hu ndred and Ninet y- eight , t his
Ii IIlh dny o f February, at Eight o 'clo ck in the mo rning, pursuant
, , , , I I IIrlc 81 9 of t he C ode of C ivil Proc edu re and at t he requ est of
~I "lid Mme. Bonhomme Uac qu es), t he hu sband bot h in his own
lIun!' lind in suppo rt and autho rizatio n o f the lady his spo use, pro -
1 1 1 1 1 '1 01 '5 o f a ho use situate at Paris, no . 100 bis, rue Richer, the
litH "mcntio ned having address fo r service at my residence and fur-
d", , , ' t he T own Hal l ofQ borou gh,
" T HE UNDERSI GNED, RENE- I SI DORE PANMUPHLE,
't ~'"'"AT T AC HED T O T HE C I VI L C OURT OF FI RST I NST ANC E
il l , 'l iE DEPART MENT OF SEI NE, I N SESSI ON AT PARI S,
1 '1 '< ! I l I NG I N SAI D C I T Y, 3 7 RUE PAVEE, do hereby su mmon in
1 1 'IIPI'ol! io n in the name o f the Law and o fJustice M. Faustro ll, do c-
1 1 1 1 1 tcnant o f vario us premises dependent upo n the ho use
ill II "Illcmio ned, residing therein at the afo rementio ned rue Richer,
"" 1 00bis, whic h bears at present t he nu mber 1 00, where hav-
!U H pl'o ceeded and having kno cked vario usly and successively
Ithtlut o btaining a reply, we beto o k o urselves to Paris, to the
II Iii I' o r M. So larcable, co mmissio ner o f po lice, the latter grant-
ItI~1 1 /'1 his assistance in o ur undertaking; to pay to myself as Bailiff
Old h C:lrer o f said summo ns, the sum o f Three Hundred and
9
F', , ' , ~~-
Seventy-two tho usand francs 27 centimes in respect o f Eleven
quarters rental o f the afo rementio ned premises witho ut prejudice
to o ther claims, the named party having refused payment o f these
claims.
Wherefore I have seized in dist raint and pl ac ed u nder t he
au t horit y of t he Law and of J u st ic e t he fol l owing objec t s:
C ONC ERNI NG T HE EQUI VALENT BOOKS
OF DOC T OR FAUST ROLL
I n t he premises det ail ed above, ent ry having been effec t ed by M.
Lo urdeau, lo cksmith at Paris, no . 205, rue Nico las Flamel, with
t he exc ept ion of a bed of pol ished c opper mesh, t wel ve met ers l ong
and wit hou t bedding, of an ivory c hair and of an onyx and gol d
table; sequestratio n made o f twenty-seven asso rted vo lumes, so me
paper- bac ked and ot hers bou nd, wit h t he fol l owing t it l es:
1 . BAUDELAIRE,a vo lume o fE.A. POE translatio ns.
2. BERGERAC , Wor ks, vol u me I I , c ont aining t he Histor y of
the States and Empir es of the Sun, and t he Histor y of Bir ds-
3_ The Gospel Accor ding to SAI NT LUKE, in Greek.
4. BLOY, The Ungr ateful Beggar _
5. COLERIDGE,The Rime of the Ancient lvlariller.
1 0
6. DARI EN, The Thief
7, DESBORDES- VALMORE, The Oath of the Little Men_
8. ELSKAMP, I lluminated Designs_
9. An odd vol u me of t he Plays of FLORI AN.
1 0. An odd vol u me of The Thousand and One Nights, in t he
GALLAND translatio n.
1 1 . GRABBE,Scherz.., Satire, Ironie und tiefere Bedeutung,
co medy in three acts.
1 2. KAHN, The Tale of Gold and of Silence.
1 j. LAUT REAMONT , The Lays of Maldor or .
1 4, MAET ERLI NC K, Aglavaine and Selysette.
I'. MALLARME,Verse and Prose.
1 6. MENDES, Gog.
1 7 , The Odyssey, T eu bner's edit ion.
I R. PELADAN, Babylon.
1 '1 . RABELAI S.
}o. J EAN DE C HI LRA, The Sexual Hour .
J I, HENRI DE REGNI ER, The J asper Cane.
2. RI MBAUD, The I lluminations.
I . SC HWOB, The Childr ens' Cr usade.
) ,' - Ubu Roi.
VERLAINE, Wisdom.
)1 , . VERHAEREN, The Hallucinated Landscapes.
l7. VERNE, Voyage to the Center of the Ear th.
ii
, ~;r""::-'
':'
In additio n, three prints hanging o n the walls, a po ster by
TOULOUSE-LAUTREC,j ane Avr il; one by BONNARD, advert ising
t he Revue Blanche; a port rait of Doc t or Fau st rol l , by AUBREY
BEARDSLEY; and an o ld picture, which appeared to us to be value-
l ess, Saint Cado, issu ed by t he Obert hu r print ing hou se of Rennes.
Itwas impossibl e t o ent er t he c el l ar du e t o t he fl ooding t hereof
It appeared to be filled, to a height o f two meters, with a mixture
o f wine and spirits, tho ugh no barrels o r bo ttles were to be seen.
I have installed as guardian thereo f, in absence o f the subject
o f distraint, M. Delmo r de Pio nsec, o ne o f my witnesses named
hereu nder. T he sal e wil l t ake pl ac e on what ever day shal l u l t i-
mat el y be dec ided, at t he hou r of noon, in t he Pl ac e de l 'Opera.
And from al l t he aforement ioned fac t s, I have assembl ed t he
present o fficial repo rt, the co mpilatio n o f which o ccupied me fro m
eight in the mo rning until a quarter befo re three in the afterno o n,
and of whic h I have l eft a c opy for t he su bjec t of dist raint , in t he
hands o f his excellency the afo renamed co mmissio ner o f po lice,
and with the guardian, and witho ut prejudice to any further
actio ns, the abo ve matter who lly in the presence o f and assisted by
Messrs. Delmo r de Pio nsec and Tro cco n,4 atto rneys-at-law, resid-
ing at Paris, 37 rue Pavee, the required witnesses who have with
myself signed o riginal and co py. Co st thirty-two francs 40 cen-
times. Fo r the co pies were used two sheets o f o fficial paper
c ost ing I fro 20 c ent imes_ Signed: Lou rdeau , l oc ksmit h.' Signed:
So larcable, co mmissio ner o f po lice. Signed: Delmo r de Pio nsec.
1 2
"fined: Panmu phl e, bail iff6 Regist ered at Paris, t he IIt h day of
I ', hru at y 1 898. Rec eived five franc s_ Signed: Lic onet
7
T ru e c opy
'I 'I 'Lified. (I llegible,)
NOT I C E OF WARRANT
ENABLING IMMEDIATE SALE
I N r HI S YEA R Eighteen Hundr ed and Ninety-eight, t he Fou rt h
, I "y of J u ne, at the r equest ar M. and Mme. Bonhomme Oac qu es),
till' husband residing at Paris, rue Pavee, 37, electing domicile in my
"/1 '"' , nd fu rt her at t he T own Hal l of Qborou gh; I , the under -
I iHI I , - t i, Rene- I sidore Panmu phl e, BALI FF attached to the Civil Cour t
II/ I/ i l ' l l blStance of the Department of the Seine, in session at Paris, resid-
IIIH //I sClid City, 37, rue Pavee, have signified) declared, and under the
. /""' ,. heading deposited copy with M. Faustr oll . . .
*
h""e", t his present hal f- sheet of spec ial st amped paper at 60
II HI1 rncs is insufficient to reco rd the diverse marvels which I dis-
IIIVI'f'td at the ho me o f the said Do cto r Faustro ll, having drunk
il l y nil in t he c eI l ar int o whic h he had hu rl ed me; t he present
1 3
""'''~.C"'''. , , ---
;;- ';
. ,,'
deponent provisional l y does sol ic it t he favor of his honor t he
President of t he C ivil T ribu nal of t he Seine t o au t horize, in so far
as t he c ost of st amped paper does t hreat en t o exc eed l argel y t he
amou nt deposit ed, t he desc ript ion of t he ensu ing event S on u n~
st amped paper, so t hat a rec ord may be ret ained for t he Law and
forJ u st ic e of t he said marvel s, and t hat su c h rec ord may not perish.
C ONC ERNI NG T HE DOC T OR'S BOAT ,
WHI C H I S A SI EVE
TO c. v. BOY S
Doc t or Fau st rol l , arising from u nder t he sheet s c overing t he
pol ished c opper bed whic h I was not au t horized t o seize, and
addressing himsel f t o me, speaking t o me personal l y, said:
"I t is probabl e t hat you have no c onc ept ion, Panmu phl e, writ ~
c arrying bail iff, of c apil l arit y, of su rfac e t ension, nor of weight l ess
membranes, equ il at eral hyperbol ae, su rfac es wit hou t c u rvat u re,
nor, more general l y, of t he el ast ic skin whic h is wat er's epidermis.
1 I
~
"Sinc e t he days when saint s and mirac l e- workers went sail ing
In st one t rou ghs or on c oat s of c oarse c l ot h, and when C hrist
wal ked barefoot on t he sea, I know of no c reat u re - apart from
1 4
IIlysclF - ot her t han t he fil iform wat er~sc orpion and t he l arvae of
WUl er- gnat s, c apabl e of making u se of t he su rfac e of ponds, eit her
1 1 0m above or beneat h, as a sol id fl oor.
C 'Lt is t ru e t hat it has been possibl e t o c onst ru c t sac ks made
1 1 1 1 1 1 1 ::t mat erial whic h al l ows air and st eam t o pass t hrou gh bu t is
I l npc nneabl e t o wat er, so t hat one c an bl owou t a c andl e t hrou gh
1 1 1 1 ' c l ot h and yet t he same c l ot h wil l ret ain it s l iqu id c ont ent indef-
l l il l el y. My c ol l eagu e F, de Romil l y has su c c eeded in boil ing
I l ql l ids in a bel l jar whose base was made of gau ze wit h a fairl y
wllir mesh ...
C 1 BLl tt his bed, t wel ve met ers l ong, is not a bed bu t a boat ,
.h~ipc d l ike an el ongat ed sieve. T he meshes are wide enou gh t o
I I l l l w t he passage of a l arge pin; and t he whol e sieve has been
rHppcd in mel t ed paraffin, t hen shaken so t hat t his su bst anc e
I whl c h is never real l y touched by wat er), whil e c overing t he web,
1 .. l I v\:8 t he hol es empt y - t he nu mber of whic h amou nt s t o abou t
1 1 1 1 1 '1 '1 1 mil l ion fou r hu ndred t hou sand_ When Ipl ac e my sieve on
dl l i l 'l ver, t he wat er's skin t au t ens against t he hol es, and t he
Ilqllid fl owing beneat h c annot penet rat e u nl ess t he skin breaks.
I\II! t he c onvexit y of my rou nd keel offers no projec t ing angl e, and
, hi' p! 'c ssu re of t he wat er du ring l au nc hing, whil e ju mping rapids,
I II " is redu c ed by an ext ernal non- paraffined shel l wit h mu c h
\.n j.\t'l meshes, sixt een t hou sand onl y; t his serves addit ional l y t o
1 1 I 1 1 \1 'C t t he paraffin gl aze from being sc rat c hed by reeds, ju st as an
IUINior gril l saves it from damage by feet .
1 5
'I"'il'~;~-"---'-:"
:~, ~;j;;
. , - , "
"My sieve, then, floats like a boat, and can be laden without
sinking to the bottom. Not only that, it possesses this advantage
over ordinary boats - as my learned friend C. V. Boys has
remarked to me - that one can allow a thin jet of water to fall 011
it without submerging it. If 1 should decide to expel my urates, or
if a wave should break over the side, the liquid will simply pass
through the mesh and rejoin the external waves.
"In this perpetually dry boat (called a skiff, doubtless because
it is constructed to carry three people),9 1 shall henceforth take up
my residence, since 1 am forced to leave this house ... "
"Doubtless," 1 said, "because the premises are no longer
furnished. "
"I also possess an even finer skiff," continued the doctor, "o!
quartz fiber drawn out by means of a crossbow; but at the present
moment I have just deposited thereon, with the aid of a straw,
250,000 drops of castor oil, in imitation of the beads on spiders'
webs, alternately large and small beads, the vibrations per second
of the latter being to the vibrations per second of the former in till'
proportion of 64,000/1,500,000 under the sole influence of th,
pressure of the liquid's elastic skin. This skiff has every appear
ance of a huge genuine spider's web, and catches flies just as easily.
But it is only fitted out for one person.
"And since the present one carries three people, you sh;dl
accompany me, and someone else to whom you will shortly 111'
introduced - not to mention some others, for 1 am bringing alon~'.
16
III!' beings who have managed to escape your Law and your
111.1 H't' between the lines of my seized volumes.
li!\nd while I enumerate them, and summon the other person,
III,,' is :1 book, hand-written by myself, which you can seize as the
I~lilly-eighth volume and read, so that you may not only contain
till. "l'IP in patience but may also very probably understand me bet-
1'1 d'lring the course of this voyage, though I am not asking your
HlillI.on :lbour its necessity."
liy cs, but this navigation in a sieve .. "
"The skiff is not only propelled by oar blades but also by suc-
Ih.n disks at the end of spring levers. And its keel travels on three
",I,'ollers at the same level. I am all the more convinced of the
",.dlnlce of my calculations and of its insubmersibility in that, as
It Illy invariable habit, we shall not be navigating on water but on
Ii\' I,,,,d."
CONCERNING THE CHOSEN FEW
I 'II('1S the foliated space of the twenty-seven equivalents, F austroll
IIII!III'cdup into the third dimension:
P"O T ll Baudelaire, E. A. Poe's Silence, taking care to retrans-
I!II I\l1udelaire's translation into Greek.
17
..
Il!II!IIIII!!I~lioIJI1IIo\':I{":r'''~ .. 1""M"'~'I,m~.~.:., .
.. ..... ..
From Bergerac, the precious tree into which the nightingale-
king and his subjects were metamorphosed, in the land of the sun.
From Luke, the Calumniator who carried Christ on to a
high place.
From Bloy, the black pigs of Death, retinue of the Betrothed.
From Coleridge, the ancient mariner's crossbow and the
ship's floating skeleton, which, when placed in the skiff, was sieve
upon SIeve.
From Darien, the diamond crowns of the Saint-Gothard
rock-drillers,
From Desbordes-Valmore, the duck placed by the woodcutter
at the children's feet, and the fifty-three trees with scored barks.
From Elskamp, the hares, running over the sheets, which
became cupped hands and carried the spherical universe like a
fruit.
From Florian, Scapin's lottery ticket.
From The Thousand and One Nights, the eye of the rhird
Kalender, who was the son of a king: the eye poked out by the tail
of the flying horse.
From Grabbe, the thirteen journeymen tailors massacred al
dawn by Baron Mordax on the order of the knight of the papal
order of Civil Merit, and the table napkin which he tied round h,.,
neck beforehand,
From Kahn, one of the golden peals from the celestial gold
smiths' shops.
18
From Lalltreamonc, the scarab, beautiful as the trembling of
h U li d s in alcoholism, which vanished over the horizon.
From Maeterlinck, the lights heard by the first blind sister.
From Mallarme, the virgin, the bright, and the beautiful today.
From Mendes, the north wind which blew upon the green sea
"11.1 hle"ded with its salt the sweat of the galley slave who rowed
11111 il he was a hundred and twenty years old.
I:rom The Odyssey, the joyful walk of the irreproachable son of
l'i'!t'\lS in the meadow of asphodels.
I;rom Peladan, the reflection, in the mirror of the shield sil-
I I I'll with ancestral ashes, of the sacrilegious massacre of the
.rVI'11 planets.
I:rom Rabelais, the little bells to which the devils danced dur-
1 1 1 1 -\ I he tempest.
I"'om Rachilde, Cleopatra,
From Regnier, the sorrel plain where the modern centaur
IIIlIJll~d.
J'.om Rimbaud, the icicles hurled by the wind of God into
Ili I Willers.
I:"om Schwob, the scaly animals imitated by the whiteness of
,h., II'per's hands.
1 : " 0 1 1 1 Ubu Rai, the fifth letter of the first word of the first act.
I:"olll Verhaeren, the cross made by the spade in the horizon's
IlItI, h"ows.
I,"'olll Verlaine, voices asymptotic toward death.
19
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le s s am b i ti ous ly, wi ll de s cr i b e a uni ve r s e whi ch can b e - and pe r -
haps s hould b e - e nvi s ag e d i n the place of the tr adi ti onal one ,
s i nce the laws that ar e s uppos e d to have b e e n di s cove r e d i n the tr a-
di ti onal uni ve r s e ar e als o cor r e lati ons of e xce pti ons , alb e i t m or e
fr e que nt one s , b ut i n any cas e acci de ntal data whi ch,\e duce d to
the s tatus of une xce pti onal e xce pti ons , pos s e s s no long e r e ve n the
vi r tue of or i g i nali ty.
DE FINITION. Pataphysic s is the sc ienc e of imaginary solutions, whic h
symbolic ally attributes the properties of objec ts, desc ribed by their virtu-
ality, to their lineaments.
Conte m por ar y s ci e nce i s founde d upon the pr i nci ple of i n-
ducti on: m os t pe ople have s e e n a ce r tai n phe nom e non pr e ce de or
follow s om e othe r phe nom e non m os t ofte n, and conclude the r e -
fr om that i t wi ll e ve r b e thus . Apar t fr om othe r cons i de r ati ons , thi s
i s tr ue only i n the m ajor i ty of cas e s , de pe nds upon the poi nt of
vi e w, and i s codi fi e d only for conve ni e nce - i f that! Ins te ad of
for m ulati ng the law of the fall of a b ody towar d a ce nte r , how far
m or e appos i te would b e the law of the as ce ns i on of a vacuum
towar d a pe r i phe r y, a vacuum b e i ng cons i de r e d a uni t of non-
de ns i ty, a hypothe s i s far le s s ar b i tr ar y than the choi ce of a concr e te
uni t of pos i ti ve de ns i ty s uch as water?
For e ve n thi s b ody i s a pos tulate and an ave r ag e m an's poi nt
of vi e w, and i n or de r that i ts quali ti e s , i f not i ts natur e , s hould
2 2
I'e m ai n fai r ly cons tant, i t would b e ne ce s s ar y to pos tulate that the
he i g ht of hum an b e i ng s s hould r e m ai n m or e or le s s cons tant and
ll1 utually e qui vale nt. Uni ve r s al as s e nt i s alr e ady a qui te m i r aculous
fi nd i ncom pr e he ns i b le pr e judi ce . Why s hould anyone clai m that
the s hape of a watch i s r ound - a m ani fe s tly fals e pr opos i ti on -
s i nce i t appe ar s i n pr ofi le as a nar r ow r e ctang ular cons tr ucti on,
lIi pti c on thte e s i de s ; and why the de vi l s hould one only have
noti ce d i ts s hape at the m om e nt of looki ng at the ti m e ? - Pe r haps
unde r the pr e te xt of uti li ty. But a chi ld who dr aws a watch as a ci r -
"Ie wi ll als o dr aw a hous e as a s quar e , as a fa'r ade , wi thout any
jus ti fi cati on, of cour s e ; b e caus e , e xce pt pe r haps i n the countr y, he
wi ll r ar e ly s e e an i s olate d b ui ldi ng , and e ve n i n a s tr e e t the fa,ade s
have the appe ar ance of ve r y ob li que tr ape zoi ds .
We m us t, i n fact, i ne vi tab ly adm i t that the com m on he r d
(i ncludi ng s m all chi ldr e n and wom e n) i s too di m wi tte d to com pr e -
he nd e lli pti c e quati ons , and that i ts m e m b e r s ar e at one i n a
s o-calle d uni ve r s al as s e nt b e caus e the y ar e capab le of pe r ce i vi ng
only thos e cur ve s havi ng a s i ng le focal poi nt, s i nce i t i s e as i e r to
oi nci de wi th one poi nt r athe r than wi th two. The s e pe ople com -
m uni cate and achi e ve e qui li b r i um b y the oute r e dg e of the i r b e lli e s ,
t.ang e nti ally. But e ve n the com m on he r d has le ar ne d that the real
uni ve r s e i s com pos e d of e lli ps e s , and tr ade s m e n ke e p the i r wi ne i n
b ar r e ls r athe r than cyli nde r s .
So that we m ay not ab andon, thr oug h di g r e s s i on, our us ual
2 3
i ; i i llJIi IlI\!!'!I!IIII"! ...... ""'fl\ll: nr .''''JfI'': '' ~'T""'''- -
'" .~. ,
e xam ple of wate r , le t us r e fle ct, i n thi s conne cti on, upon the i r r e v-
e r e nce of the com m on he r d whos e i ns ti nct s um s up the ade pts of
the s ci e nce of pataphys i cs i n the followi ng phr as e : \
FAUSTROLL SMALLE R THAN FAUSTROLL
TO WILLIAM CROOKES
Other madmen c ried c easeledy that the figure one was al the same
lime bigger and smaller than ilself, and prodaimed a number of
similar absurdities as if they were useful dis(oYeries.
- THE TALISMAN OF ORM1AN E
Doctor Faus tr oll (i f one m ay b e pe r m i tte d to s pe ak fr om pe r s onal
e xpe r i e nce ) de s i r e d one day to b e s m alle r than hi m s e lf and r e s olve d
to e xplor e one of the e le m e nts , i n or de r to e xam i ne any di s tur -
b ance s whi ch thi s chang e i n s i ze m i g ht i nvolve i n the i r m utual
r e lati ons hi p.
For thi s pur pos e he chos e that s ub s tance whi ch i s nor m ally
li qui d, color le s s , i ncom pr e s s i b le and hor i zontal i n s m all quanti ti e s ;
havi ng a cur ve d s ur face , b lue i n de pth and wi th e dg e s r hat te nd to
e b b and flow whe n i t i s s tr e tche d; whi ch Ar i s totle te r m s he avy, li ke
e ar th; the e ne m y of fi r e and r e nas ce nt fr om i t whe n de com pos e d
2 4
e xplos i ve ly; whi ch vapor i ze s at a hundr e d de g r e e s , a te m pe r atur e
de te r m i ne d b y thi s fact, and i n a s oli d s tate floats upon i ts e lf -
wate r , of cour s e ! And havi ng s hr unk to the clas s i c s i ze of a m i te ,
as a par adi g m of s m allne s s , he tr ave le d along the le ng th of a
cab b ag e le af, payi ng no atte nti on to hi s fe llow m i te s or to the m ag -
ni fi e d as pe ct of hi s s ur r oundi ng s , unti l he e ncounte r e d the Wate r .
Thi s was a g lob e , twi ce hi s s i ze , thr oug h whos e tr ans par e ncy
the outli ne s of the uni ve r s e appe ar e d to hi m g i g anti cally e nlar g e d,
whi ls t hi s own i m ag e , r e fle cte d di m ly b y the le ave s ' foi l, was m ag -
ni fi e d to hi s or i g i nal s i ze . He g ave the or b a li g ht tap, as i f
knocki ng on a door : the de r aci nate d e ye of m alle ab le g las s
"adapte d i ts e lf" li ke a li vi ng e ye , b e cam e pr e s b yopi c, le ng the ne d
i ts e lf along i ts hor i zontal di am e te r i nto an ovoi d m yopi a, r e puls e d
Faus tr oll b y m e ans of thi s e las ti c i ne r ti a and b e cam e s phe r i cal once
m or e .
-
The doctor , taki ng s m all s te ps , r olle d the cr ys tal g lob e , wi th
s om e cons i de r ab le di ffi culty, towar d a ne i g hb or i ng g lob e , s li ppi ng
on the r ai ls of the cab b ag e -le af's ve i ns ; com i ng tog e the r , the two
s phe r e s s ucke d e ach othe r i n, tape r i ng i n the pr oce s s , unti l s ud-
de nly a ne w g lob e of twi ce the s i ze r ocke d placi dly i n fr ont of
Faus tr oll.
Wi th the ti p of hi s b oot the doctor ki cke d out at thi s une x-
pe cte d de ve lopm e nt of the e le m e nts : an e xplos i on, for m i dab le i n
i ts fr ag m e ntati on and noi s e , r ang out followi ng the pr oje cti on all
ar ound of ne w and m i nute s phe r e s , dr y and har d as di am onds , that
2 5
... ".
"I : .;.".: _.
' . , " M
r olle d to and fr o all along the g r e e n ar e na, e ach one d~~wi ng along
b e ne ath i t the i m ag e of the tang e nti al poi nt of the uni ve r s e , di s -
tor ti ng i t accor di ng to the s phe r e 's pr oje cti on and m ag ni fyi ng i ts
fab ulous ce nte r .
Be ne ath e ve r ythi ng , the chlor ophyll, li ke a s hoal of g r e e n
fi s he s , followe d i ts char te d cur r e nts i n the cab b ag e 's s ub te r r ane an
canals ...
CON CE RN IN G THE DOG FACE D BABOON
BOSSE -DE -N AGE , WHO KN E W N O HUMAN
WORDS BUT "HA HA"
TO CHRISTIAN BECK
Hey, you, said Giromoll gravely; as for you, I' ll fake your robe
for a storm-sail; YOllr legs for masts, your arms for yardarms; your
body for the hull, and I' ll f . . well pitc h you into the water with
six inc hes of steel in your stomac h for ballast . . . And s i ,l fe , when
you are a ship, it' s your fat head whic h fjiill serve as a figurehead,
then / shall baptize you: the di r ty b .
- E UGE N E SUE , THE SALAMANDER
(LE PICHON JOUE IC DE IS DIABLE S)11
2 6
Bos s e -de -Nag e was a dog face d b ab oon le s s cyno- than hydr o-
ce phalous , and, as a r e s ult of thi s b le m i s h, le s s i nte lli g e nt than hi s
fe llows . The r e d and b lue callos i ty whi ch the y s por t on the i r b ut-
tocks was , i n hi s cas e , di s place d b y Faus tr oll, b y m e ans of s om e
s tr ang e m e di cati on, and g r afte d on to hi s che e ks , azur i ne on one ,
s car le t on the othe r , s o that hi s flat face was a tr i color .
Not conte nt wi th thi s , the g ood doctor wante d to te ach
hi m to s pe ak; and i f Bos s e -de -Nag e (s o nam e d b e caus e of the
doub le pr otub e r ance of the che e ks de s cr i b e d ab ove ) was not
com ple te ly fam i li ar wi th the Fr e nch lang uag e , he could pr o-
nounce fai r ly cor r e ctly a fe w wor ds of Be lg i an, calli ng the li fe
b e lt hang i ng at the s te r n of Faus tr oll's s ki ff "s wi m m i ng -b ladde r
wi th i ns cr i pti on the r e on," b ut m or e ofte n he e nunci ate d a tauto-
log i cal m onos yllab le :
"Ha ha," he s ai d i n Fr e nch; and he adde d nothi ng m or e .
Thi s char acte r wi ll pr ove ve r y us e ful dur i ng the cour s e of thi s
b ook, to punctuate s om e of i ts ove r long s pe e che s : i n the m anne r
of Vi ctor Hug o (The Burgraves, par t I, s c. 2 ):
And is that all?
- Nay, listen yet:
And Plato, i n var i ous pas s ag e s : 1 2
2 7
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- 'Op8a"""x.
- 'Op8i i i s y', <jlT\
- 'Op8i i i s <jlT\.
- 'Op8i i i s Ol OOKe lS ),}ylV.
28
- OUKOUVXPi l.
- nov- ranum.
- nCWt a.1t acn ev oDv.
- TIciV t ffiV 6: )"l O 't CC
- ITcivu ev O Dv.
- I1E l < J O E ea E V O Dv,
- ITOAAi l avaytCll.
- nOAU ye .
- Il o AU V O DV af"uJ t cc
- npE "l yap.
- ITi i i s yap av.
- ITi i i s yap au.
- ITi i i s 0' au.
- Iioai.
- n~v.
- Touw v aA1 1 8s AE YlS.
- "Qs oOKe l.
He r e follows the nar r ati ve of Re ne -Is i dor e Panm uphle .
2 9
--
" u ."., .;.1, .. ;, ' , n-'
, ~,
BOOK THRE E
IF JR9 00 lP' A JRIT
lP'AJRIT ImY
1 1 .'9
lE A
OR 1 fH~ IE IUi lAN
fAMll ROlBi NSON
TO ALFRED VALLETTE
Inquiring what men of learning there were Ihell in the city, and
what wine they drank there.
- GARGANTUA, C HAPTE R XVI
II II
CONCE RNING THE E MBARKATION IN THE ARK
Bos s e -de -Nag e de s ce nde d wi th ti ny s te ps , m aki ng s ur e of the flat
adhe s i on of hi s fe e t as one unr olls a g lue d pos te r , car r yi ng the s ki ff
o n his sho ul der by t he ears, in imit at io n o f t he ancient E gypt ians
te achi ng the i r di s ci ple s . The r e d m e tal s ur face , li ke that of the
bo at - fl y, began t o shine in t he sun as t he l o ng bo at vent ured it s
xyphoi d twe lve -m e te r long pr ow fr om out of the pas s ag e way. The
curved bl ades o f t he o ars made a cl ango ro us so und as t hey scraped
along the s i de s of the old s tone walls .
3 0
"Ha hal" s ai d Bos s e -de -Nag e as he de pos i te d the s ki ff upon
t he pavement ; but o n t his o ccasio n he added no t hing t o his
st at ement .
Faus tr oll r ub b e d the r ub i cund che e ks of the cab i n b oy ag ai ns t
t he gro o ves o f t he sl iding seat t o l ubricat e t he mechanism; t he
s cor che d face g lowe d m or e lum i nous ly s ti ll, s we lli ng up i n the b ows
as a l ant ern t o l ight o ur way. The do ct o r sat aft o n his ivo ry chair:
bet ween his l egs was t he o nyx t abl e co vered wit h his co mpasses,
maps, sext ant s and vario us o t her scient ific inst rument s; he t hrew
at his feet , in pl ace o f bal l ast , t he curio us beings ret ained fro m
his t went y- seven equival ent bo o ks and t he manuscript seized by
m ys e lf; the n he pas s e d ar ound hi s e lb ows the ti lle r 's two g ui de
ro pes, and mo t io ning me t o sit do wn, facing him, o n t he fel t sl id-
i ng s e at (whi ch I could not he lp ob e yi ng , dr unk as I was and r e ady
to b e li e ve anythi ng ), he s hackle d m y fe e t to two le athe r fe tte r s at
the b ottom of the s ki ff, and thr us t i nto m y hands the handle s of
t he ash- wo o d o ars, who se bl ades mo ved apart wit h t he surging
symmet ry o f t wo peaco ck's feat hers preening.
I pul l ed at t he o ars, mo ving in my backward po sit io n I knew
no t whit her, squint ing bet ween t wo l anes o f mo ist l ines in a gray
hoti zontali ty, ove r taki ng for m s loom i ng up fr om b e hi nd m e whi ch
the s har p-e dg e d oar s choppe d off at the le g s ; othe r di s tant fotm s
followe d the di r e cti on we we r e taki ng . We ploug he d thr oug h the
masses o f peo pl e as t hro ugh a dense fo g, and t he aco ust ical sign
o f o ur pro gress was t he screech o f t earing sil k.
3 1
1 ".,": ,: ~f"'t"l'!; .<
Be twe e n the di s tant fi g ur e s whi ch followe d us and thos e ne ar
us whi ch cr os s e d our path, one could di s ti ng ui s h othe r fi g ur e s ,
ve r ti cal and m or e or le s s s tati onar y. Faus tr oll cons e nte d to e xplai n
to m e that the functi on of navi g ator s was to m ake land and to
dr i nk, whi le the r ole of Bos s e -de -Nag e was to dr aw the s ki ff up on
to the b ank at e ach halt on our e r r ant way, as als o to i nte r r upt our
conve r s ati on, whe r e a paus e m i g ht b e conve ni e nt, wi th hi s i nte r -
je cti ons ; thus , I g aze d at the b e i ng s havi ng i nto vi e w fr om b e hi nd
m e , i n the s am e way as di d the watche r s i n the Platoni c de n, and I
cons ulte d on s ucce s s i ve occas i ons the te achi ng of the ve s s e l's m as -
te r , Faus tr oll the doctor .
fli e s b or i ng i nto fle s h to lay the i r e g g s - thi s de ad b ody i s not only
an i s land b ut a m an: he i s ple as e d to call hi m s e lf Bar on Hi lde b r and
of r he Squi r ty Se a.
1 3
"And s i nce the i s land i s s te r i le and de s olate , he can g r ow no
ki nd of b e ar d. He s uffe r e d fr om i m pe ti g o i n chi ldhood, and hi s
nur s e , who was s o old that he r lor e was s uffi ci e nt to e ncour ag e
unus ually copi ous s tool, pr e di cte d to hi m that thi s was a s i g n that
he would b e unab le to di s s i m ulate fr om anyone
the infamous nudity of his c alfs muzzle.
TO LOUIS L.
"Only hi s b r ai n - and the ante r i or m otor ce nte r s of the
m e dulla - ar e de ad. And b e caus e of thi s i ne r ti a he i s , on our navi -
g ator y r oute , not a m an b ut an i s land, and thi s i s why (i f you b oth
b e have , I wi ll s how you the m ap) ... "
"Ha ha!" s ai d Bos s e -de -Nag e , waki ng up s udde nly; the n he
r e laps e d i nto an ob s ti nate s i le nce .
" ... Thi s i s why," conti nue d Faus tr oll, "I fi nd hi m m e nti one d
on m y fluvi al m ap as i s le of Cack." 1 4
"Ye s ," 1 s ai d, "b ut how i s i t that thi s cr owd of pe ople and
b i r ds whi ch has com e to s catte r ob i tuar i e s on the cor ps e can r ave n
upon hi m wi th s uch confi de nce , i n the m i ddle of thi s vas t plai n,
whi le all the s e g r ayb e ar ds and young m e n, i f I am not i s ob i c to
che r n, ar e b li nd and wi thout s ti cks ?"
"Se e he r e ," s ai d Faus tr oll, ope ni ng hi s s e i ze d m anus cr i pt, the
CONCE RNING THE SOUITTY SE A,
THE OLFACTORY LIGHTHOUSE , AND THE
ISLE OF CACK, WHE RE WE DRANK NOT
"Thi s de ad b ody," s ai d the doctor , "fr om whos e car cas s you can
s e e old fog i e s tr e m b li ng i n s e ni li ty and young m e n wi th r e d hai r ,
e qually cr e ti nous i n the i r s pe e ch and the i r s i le nce , g i vi ng b e aks full
of fle s h to s pe ckle d, handwr i ti ng -color e d b i r ds , li ke i chne um on
3 2 3 3
iiI."IIIII!II.!'fI!~""~~r, ~", (''''''~-: '
<',;
"tt~t'.:
"
E LE ME NTS O F PATAPHYSICS, bo o k N, ch. S: Concerning
Obelisc holyc hnies
15
for dogs, while they are still baying at the moon.
"A l ight ho use raises it s pro .. in a st o rm, says Co rbiere; a
l ight ho use l ift s it s finger t o po int o ut fro m afar t he pl ace o f safet y,
of tr uth and b e auty. But for m ole s and for you toO, Panm uphle , a
l ight ho use is as invisibl e as t he t en t ho usand and first so nic int er-
val i s i m pe r ce pti b le , or the i nfr ar e d r ays b y whos e li g ht I have
wr i tte n thi s b ook. The li g hthous e of the i s le of Cack i s dar k, s ub -
t erranean, and cl o acal , as if it had l o o ked at t he sun t o o l o ng. No
waves break against it , and t hus no so und guides o ne t o it . And
yo ur cerumen, Panmuphl e, wo ul d cl o se yo ur ears even t o it s sub-
t erranean rumbl ings.
"This l ight ho use no urishes it sel f upo n t he pure mat t er which
is t he subst ance o f t he isl e o fCack; t hat is t o say, t he Baro n's so ul ,
e xhale d fr om hi s m outh b y a le ade n b lowpi pe . Fr om all the place s
whe r e I r e fus e to dr i nk, fli g hts of pag e s , g ui de d b y hi s s ce nt, com e
li ke m ag pi e s to s uck li fe (the i r own, exc lusive) fr om the s yr upy and
smo king jet emanat ing fro m t he sat urnine bl o wpipe. And so t hat it
shal l no t be st o l en fro m t hem, t he graybeards, o rganized int o a
mo nast ery, have buil t upo n t he Baro n's carcass a l it t l e chapel t hat
the y have chr i s te ne d CATHOLlC MAXIMUM. The s pe ckle d b i r ds
have the i r dove cote s the r e . The pe ople call the m young wi ld
duck
1 6
We pataphys i ci ans call the m s i m ply and hone s tly s hi t-
diggers. "
IT 3
CON CE RN IN G THE LAN D OF LACE
TO AUBREY BEARDSLEY
Afte r le avi ng thi s di s ple as i ng i s land b e hi nd, our m ap was r e folde d
and I ro wed fo r ano t her six ho urs, my t o es hel d by fet t ers, my
t o ngue hanging o ut fro m t hirst - we wo ul d have been mo rt al l y il l
had we take n a dr i nk i n that i s land - and Faus tr oll ke pt m e dr awn
s o upr i g ht wi th the par alle l je r ks of the two cor ds of hi s ti lle r that,
in my backward mo t io n, I co ul d just see st raight ast ern t he isl and's
s m oke s ti ll r i s i ng unti l i t was hi dde n b y the doctor 's s houlde r s .
Bo sse- de- Nage, so exhaust ed fro m t hirst t hat he was quit e l ivid,
g ave out only a di m li g ht.
Sudde nly a pur e r li g ht than thi s e m e r g e d fr om the s hadows ,
but in no way simil ar t o t he brut al genesis o f t he wo rl d.
The ki ng of Lace dr e w out the li g ht as a r ope -m ake r plai ts hi s
r e tr og r ade li ne , and the thr e ads tr e m b le d s li g htly i n the di m li g ht,
l ike co bwebs. They wo ve t hemsel ves int o fo rest s, l ike t he l eaves
which ho arfro st engraves o n windo wpanes; t hen t hey fashio ned
t hemsel ves int o a Mado nna and her Chil d in t he Christ mas sno w;
t 1l 1dt hen int o jewel s, peaco cks, and go wns, int ermingl ing l ike
d,e s wi m m i ng dance of the Rhi ne m ai de ns . The Be aux and the
Bel l es st rut t ed and preened in imit at io n o f fans, unt il t heir pat ient
3 4
3 5
, : , , : ;: ". .._; . .. "" .. -
TO EMILE BERNARD
s e ve n m os t e xce lle nt qui nte s s e nce s of wor ks b r oug ht b ack b y
i nqui s i ti ve m e n fr om the i r tr ave ls , m anne d als o b y a b ai li ff nam e d
Panm uphle (I, Re ne -Is i dor e , the unde r s i g ne d) and b y a hydr o-
ce phalous b ab oon knowi ng no wor ds of hum an lang uag e e xce pt ha
ha. He r e , i ns te ad of s tr e e t lam ps we could s e e anci e nt m onum e nts
of car ve d s tone , g r e e n s tatue s cr ouchi ng down i n r ob e s folde d i n
the s hape of he ar ts ; he te r os e xual r i ng -dance r s b lowi ng i nto unm e n-
ti onab le flag e ole ts ; fi nally, a s e awe e d-g r e e n calvar y i n whi ch the
e ye s of the wom e n we r e li ke nuts clove n hor i zontally b y the s utur e
li ne of the i r s he lls .
The i ncli ne ope ne d out s udde nly i nto the tr i ang le of an ope n
s pace . The s ky ope ne d out too, and a s un b ur s t ope n i n i t li ke the
yolk of a pr ai r i e oys te r b ur s ti ng i n the thr oat, and the azur e b e cam e
r e ddi s h b lue ; the s e a was s o war m that i t s te am e d; the r e dye d
cos tum e s of the pas s e r s -b y we r e s plas he s of color m or e b r i lli ant
than opaque pr e ci ous s tone s .
"Ar e you Chr i s ti ans ?" as ke d a b r onze d m an, dr e s s e d i n a
g audy s m ock, s tandi ng i n the ce nte r of the li ttle tr i ang ular town.
"Li ke M. Ar oue t, M. Re nan, and M. Char b onne l," I ans we r e d
afte r s om e r e fle cti on. I?
"I am God," s ai d Faus tr oll.
"Ha ha!" s ai d Bos s e -de -Nag e , wi thout fur the r com m e ntar y.
Thus I r e m ai ne d i n char g e of the s ki ff wi th the b ab oon cab i n
b oy, who pas s e d the ti m e b y jum pi ng on m y s houlde r s and pi s s i ng
down m y b ack; b ut I b e at hi m off wi th b lows fr om a b undle of
g athe r i ng b r oke up wi th a cr y. Jus t as the whi te junoni ans , r oos t-
i ng i n a par k, com plai n r aucous ly whe n the lyi ng i ntr us i on of a
lam p ape s pr e m atur e ly the dawn's r e fle cti on of the i r oce lli , s o an
ar tle s s s hape b ur g e one d i n the for e s t of r ake d-ove r pi ne pi tch; and
as Pi e r r ot s e r e nade s the confus i on of the m oon's e ntwi ne d b all,
the par adox of day b ur r owi ng unde r g r ound ar os e fr om Ali Bab a
s cr e am i ng i n the pi ti le s s oi l and the jar 's dar kne s s .
Bos s e -de -Nag e , as far as I could judg e , unde r s tood the s e
pr odi g i e s ve r y li ttle .
"Ha ha," he s ai d s ucci nctly; and he di d not los e hi m s e lf i n
fur the r cons i de r ati ons .
CONCE RNING THE FORE ST OF LOVE
Li ke a tr e e fr og out of wate r , the s ki ff e dg e d for war d, dr awn b y i ts
s ucti on di s ks along a s m ooth de s ce ndi ng r oad.
In thi s di s tr i ct of Par i s no om ni b us had e ve r pas s e d, nor r ai l-
way, nor tr am way, nor b i cycle , nor pr ob ab ly any ope nwor k b oat
wi th a coppe r s ki n, m ovi ng upon thr e e r olle r s s e t at the s am e le ve l,
m anne d b y a doctor pataphys i ci an, who has at hi s fe e t the twe nty-
3 6 3 7
;;;;~~!II!'l~;;;;, "", --
'I".'
writ s, and o bserved wit h curio sit y fro m far o ff t he demeano r o f t he
gail y dressed man who had appro ved of Faus tr olPs answer.
They were seat ed beneat h a great archway, behind which was
a seco nd, and behind t hese t here bl azed t he greenness and fat ness
of an hi s tor i ate d fi e ld of cab b ag e s . Be twe e n the ar che s we r e tab le s
and pit chers and benches set o ut in a barn and o n a t hreshing fl o o r,
cr owde d wi th pe ople dr e s s e d i n s apphi r e -b lue ve lve t, wi th di am ond-
s hape d face s and down-color e d hai r , the fur r y s ur face of the e ar th
and o f t he peo pl e's necks being bo t h l ike co ws' hair. Men were
wr e s tli ng i n a b lue and ye llow m e adow, di s tur b i ng s and-g r ay toads
who se fright ened cro aks reached me in t he bo at ; co upl es danced
g avotte s ; and the b ag pi pe s , fr om on top of the fr e s hly dr ai ne d
b ar r e ls , dr one d out the fli g ht of r i b b ons of whi te ti ns e l and vi ole t
s i lk.
E ach of the two thous and dance r s i n the b ar n offe r e d to
Faus tr oll a g i r dle cake , har d cub e -s hape d m i lk, and di ffe r e nt
li que ur s i n g las s e s as thi ck as a b i s hop's am e thys t i s wi de and hold-
i ng le s s than a thi m b le ful. The doctor dr ank fr om the m all. E ach
perso n present t hrew a pebbl e int o t he sea, st inging t he bl ist ers o n
my hands, no vice o arsman t hat I was, as I hel d t hem up t o pro t ect
m ys e lf, and s ti ng i ng the m ulti color e d che e ks of Bos s e -de -Nag e .
"Ha ha!" he gro wl ed, t o express his fury, but he remembered
his so l emn o at h.
The doctor r e tur ne d to the s ound of b e lls , wi th two b i g m aps
o f t he co unt ry, which his guide had given him abso l ut el y free; ant .:
represent ed real ist ical l y, wo rked in t apest ry, t he fo rest surro und-
ing t he t riangul ar space: t he ro se- red fo l iage rising abo ve t he bl ue
mass o f t he grass, and t he gro ups o f wo men, t he wave o f each
gro up wit h it s crest o f whit e bo nnet s breaking gent l y against t he
gro und, in an eccent ric circl e o f dawn shado w.
And on i t was wr i tte n: The forest of Loye. On the s e cond m ap
we r e e num e r ate d all the pr oducts of thi s happy land, m e n at the
m ar ke t wi th the i r plum p ye llow pi g s , the m s e lve s plum p and b lue ,
s tuffe d i nto the i r clothe s li ke s aus ag e s . The y we r e all as b lown
up as the che e ks of a b ag pi pe r , as full of wi nd as a b ag pi pe or a
st o mach.
The Chr i s ti an hos t took le ave of Faus tr oll cour te ous ly and
sail ed away in his o wn bo at t o ward a mo re dist ant l and. And we
co ul d see t he red l ine o f t he sea's ho rizo n cut t he beam o f his ro se-
olor e d s ai l.
We r ub b e d the adi pos e che e ks of the hydr oce phalous b ab oon
"g ai ns t the s li de r ai ls of the fe lt s e at; and whe n I had take n up
t he o ars o nce mo re, and Faust ro l l had t aken t he t il l er's sil ken
~Llid ero pes, I cro uched and st ret ched o ut o nce again in t he al t er-
l iming mo vement s o f t he o arsman, o ver t he co njo ined waves o f t he
Jr y land.
3 8
3 9
rrr: --"'~'
, '"
""
CONCE RNING THE GRE AT STAIRCASE OF
CONCE RNING THE AMORPHOUS ISLE
BLACK MARBLE
TO FRANC-NOHAIN
TO LEON BLOY
At t he val l ey's mo ut h, we skirt ed o ne final cal vary, who se fright -
ening height might have l ed o ne t o t ake it , at first sight , fo r a
gigant ic, bl ack, mass al t ar. 18 At t he bl unt po int o f t his impro babl e
marbl e pyramid, bet ween t wo aco l yt es st ro ngl y resembl ing cyno -
ce phali of Tani t, the hug e ki ng 's he ad car b oni ze d i ts e lf i n the
mo o n's furnace. He was grasping a t iger by t he scruff o f it s neck,
and was for ci ng the pe ople of the Squi tty Se a to cli m b up on hands
and kne e s . Afte r the i r b one s had fi r s t b e e n s las he d b y the b lade s
o f t he successive st eps, he l et t he mo nst ro us hunt er go rge it sel f
wi th the i r fle s h fr om b utche r s ' hooks g r i ppe d i n hi s fi s t.
He wel co med Faust ro l l wit h ho no r, and, raising his arm fro m
t he summit o f t he cal vary, he depo sit ed in o ur skiff a viat icum o f
t went y- fo ur Squit t y sea- ears skewered o n a unico rn's ho rn.
This isl and is l ike so ft co ral , amo ebo id and pro t o pl asmic: it s t rees
cl o sel y resembl e t he gest ure o f snail s making ho rns at us. It s go v-
ernment is o l igarchic. O ne o f it s kings, as t he height o f his pschent
indicat ed t o us, l ived upo n t he devo t io n o f his seragl io ; t o escape
t he judgment o f his Parl iament s, which was mo t ivat ed by envy, he
has cr awle d thr oug h the dr ai ns r i g ht down to b e low the m onoli th
in t he main square and has gnawed it away so as t o l eave a crust
o nl y t wo inches t hick. And t hus he is t wo fingers' breadt h away
fr om the g allows . Li ke Si m on Styli te s , he hi de s away i n thi s hollow
olum n, s i nce i t i s fas hi onab le today to place nothi ng on the plat-
(o rms o f t he capit al s but st at ues, which are t he best caryat ids in
bad weat her. He wo rks, sl eeps, l o ves and drinks o n t he vert ical it y
of a long ladde r , and has no othe r lam p i n hi s waki ng hour s than
t hc pal l o r o f his nupt ial s. O ne o f his mino r achievement s is t he
invent io n o f t he t andem, which ext ends t o quadrupeds t he benefit s
of the pe dal.
Ano t her king, versed in hal ieut ics, deco rat es wit h his fishing-
l incs t he cracks o f circul ar rail ways resembl ing t he beds o f rivers.
40
4l
~~~ ., ., ....-.
,'\"; '"
'iii.: ". ";): 1'
But t he t rains, wit h t he cruel t y o f yo ut h, ~has e fish befo re t hem o r
crush embryo nic bit es in t heir bel l ies.
Athi r d ki ng has r e di s cove r e d the lang uag e of par adi s e , i nte lli -
gibl e even t o animal s, and has bro ught so me o f t hese animal s t o
perfect io n. He has manufact ured el ect ric drago nfl ies and has
counte d the i nnum e r ab le ants b y us e of the fi g ur e 3 .
Ano t her, remarkabl e fo r his hairl ess face, inst ruct ed us in use-
ful wil es, so t hat we became co mpet ent t o make ful l use o f o ur free
evenings, co nso l idat e o ur dead drunk credit s and gain, wit ho ut
wast ing o ur t al ent , t he rewards o f t he French Academy.
Ano t her mimes t he t ho ught s o f mankind, using perso nages o f
whom he has ke pt only the top half of the i r b odi e s , s o that the r e
may be no t hing inside but what is pure.
Yet ano t her is el abo rat ing a huge ro me, wit h t he aim o f co m-
put ing t he qual it ies o f t he French, who , he cl aims, wil l be as brave
as t hey are gay, as gay as t hey are wit t y; in o rder t o devo t e himsel f
ent irel y t o t his l abo r, he has co nt rived t o l o se his yo ung pro geny
in t he fo rest during a co unt ry wal k, pro fit ing fro m a mo ment o f
inat t ent io n o n t heir part . And whil e we were banquet ing in his
com pany and that of the othe r ki ng s , on di ffe r e nt r ung s of the
g r e at ladde r , Bos s e -de -Nag e havi ng the job of ke e pi ng i ts foot
st eady, t he sho ut s o f t he newshawks in t he magical square info rmed
us t hat his nephews were t hat day, as o n previo us days, searching
desperat el y under t he quincuncial t rees fo r t he venerabl e absent
o ne.
42
[ 7
CONCE RNING THE FRAGRANT ISLE
TO PA UL GAUGUIN
The Fr ag r ant i s le i s com ple te ly s e ns i ti ve , and for ti fi e d b y m ad-
repo res which ret ract ed t hemsel ves, as we l anded, int o t heir
co ral - red casemat es. The skiffs mo o ring l ine was fast ened aro und
a great t ree t hat swayed in t he wind l ike a parro t ro cking it sel f in
t he sunshine.
The ki ng of the i s lands was nake d i n a b oat, hi s loi ns g i r de d
wi th hi s whi te and b lue di ade m . He was clad, too, i n s ky and
greenery l ike a Caesar's chario t race, and as red- headed as ifhe
were o n a pedest al .
We dr ank to hi s he alth i n li quor s di s ti lle d i n ve g e tab le
hemispheres.
His funct io n is t o preserve fo r his peo pl e t he image o f t heir
go ds. He was fixing o ne o f t hese images t o t he mast o f his bo at
wit h t hree nail s, and it was l ike a t riangul ar sail , o r t he equil at eral
g old of a dr i e d fi s h b r oug ht b ack fr om the s e pte ntr i on. And ove r
Ihe do o rway o f his wives' dwel l ing pl ace he has capt ured t he
ecst asies and co nt o rt io ns o f l o ve in a divine cement . St anding apart
(ro m t he int erl acing o f yo ung breast s and rumps, sibyl s reco rd
43
~~~~'''': i'I~-<'''''-
,,'; 0. "-p-- -,
"
t he fo rmul a o f happiness, which is do ubl e: Be amorous, and Be
mysterious.
He po ssesses al so a zit her wit h seven st rings o f seven co l o rs,
t he et ernal co l o rs; and, in his pal ace, a l amp no urished fro m t he
fragrant wel l springs o f t he eart h. When t he king sings, mo ving
al o ng t he sho re as he pl ays his zit her, o r when he prunes wit h an
axe, fro m images o f l iving wo o d, t he yo ung sho o t s which wo ul d
disfigure t he l ikeness o f t he go ds, his wives burro w int o t he ho l l o w
of the i r b e ds , the we i g ht of fe ar he avy upon the i r loi ns fr om the
vi g i lant g aze of the Spi r i t of the De ad, and fr om the pe r fum e d
po rcel ain o f t he great l amp's eye.
As t he skiff cast o ff fro m t he reefs, we saw t he king's wives
chas i ng fr om the i s land a li ttle le g le s s cr i pple s pr outi ng g r e e n
seaweed l ike a wizened crab; o n his dwarfish t runk a fairgro und
wr e s tle r 's tuni c ape d the ki ng 's nake dne s s . He pus he d hi m s e lf for -
ward jerkil y wit h his cest us- co vered fist s, and wit h a rumbl ing fro m
t he cast ers under his base at t empt ed t o pursue and cl amber abo ard
t he pl at fo rm o f t he Omnibus de Corinthe, which was just cro ssing
o ur ro ut e; but such a l eap is no t wit hin everyo ne's po wer. And he
fel l miserabl y sho rt , cracking his po st erio r l avat o ry pan wit h a
fissure l ess o bscene t han l udicro us.
44
CON CE RN IN G THE CASTLE -E RRAN T
WHICH IS A JUN K
TO GUSTAVE KAHN
Faus tr oll, hi s e ye on the com pas s ne e dle , de ci de d that we could
no t be very far no rt heast of Par i s . Aft er having first heard t he sea's
vert ical windo wpane, it was no t l o ng befo re we co ul d see it , hel d
in it s pl ace by a fo rt ificat io n o f t ho se pl ant s, al l ro o t , which are t he
s and's s ke le ton; and we g li de d onto the s m ooth r e ddi s h b e ach,
b e twe e n the vi s cos i ty of g r oyne s li ke par alle l le vi athans .
The sil vered sky o ffered invert ed refl ect io ns o f t he mo nument s
to b e found on the othe r s i de of the g r e e n s le e p of hulls ; s hi ps
passed acro ss t his sky, upside do wn and symmet rical t o ward invisi-
b le futur e s ; the n could b e s e e n the i m ag e of the s ti ll di s tant
r ooftops of the cas tle of Rhythm s .
Inde fati g ab le coxs wai n that I was , I pulle d on the oar s for s e v-
eral ho urs, whil e Faust ro l l so ught in vain fo r a l anding pl ace near
[he cast l e, which was receding co nst ant l y l ike a mirage; aft er pass-
ing t hro ugh narro w st reet s o f empt y ho uses t hat spied o ur
appro ach t hro ugh facet ed eyes o f co mpl icat ed mirro rs, we final l y
touche d wi th the s onor ous fr ag i li ty of our pr ow the fli g ht of s te ps
in fret wo rked wo o d l eading t o t he no madic edifice.
45
_""""'_ .......''"'''''''"~c-_c-
.';', ;'!~, ;,
We haule d the s ki ff on to the s hor e , and Bos s e -de -Nag e
st o wed t he t ackl e and t reasures in a deep gro t t o .
"Ha! ha!" he said, but we did no t l ist en t o t he rest o f his
speech.
The pal ace was a st range junk upo n a cal m sea quil t ed wit h
s and; Faus tr oll as s ur e d m e that s om e of the Atlanti de s lay b e ne ath.
Se ag ulls vi b r ate d li ke the s tr i ki ng ham m e r s of the s ky's b lue b e ll,
o r t he embel l ishment s o f a go ng's l ibrat io n.
The lor d of the i s land cam e for war d on foot, le api ng acr os s
the g ar de n plante d wi th s and dune s . He had a b lack b e ar d, and
wo re armo r o f ancient co ral ; o n several fingers he wo re sil ver rings
i n whi ch tur quoi s e s lang ui s he d. We dr ank hollands g i n and b i tte r
beer, bet ween co urses o f al l kinds o f smo ked meat . The ho urs were
s tr uck b y b e lls fas hi one d fr om all the m e tals . As s oon as the m oor -
i ng li ne had b e e n unti e d b y our laconi c de ck b oy, the cas tle
cr um b le d and di e d and r e appe ar e d m i r r or e d i n the s ky, fr om ve r y
far away, as a great junk chafing t he sand's fire.
46
CONCE RNING THE ISLE OF PTYX
TO srEPHANE MALLARME
The i s le of Ptyx i s fas hi one d fr om a s i ng le b lock of the s tone of
t his name, a pricel ess st o ne fo und o nl y in t his isl and, which is
ent irel y co mpo sed o f it . It has t he serene t ransl ucency o f whit e
sapphire and is t he o nl y precio us st o ne no t ice- co l d t o t he t o uch,
fo r it s fire ent ers and spreads it sel f l ike wine aft er drinking. O t her
st o nes are as co l d as t he cry o f t rumpet s; t his has t he precipit at ed
he at of the s ur face of ke ttle dr um s . It was e as y for us to land the r e ,
since it was cut in t abl e- fo rm, and we had t he sensat io n o f set t ing
fo o t o n a sun purged o f t he o paque o r t o o dazzl ing aspect s o f it s
fl ame; as wit h t he t o rches o f o l den t imes. O ne no l o nger no t iced
t he accident s o f t hings but o nl y t he subst ance o f t he universe, and
t his is why we did no t care whet her t he fl awl ess surface was a
l iquid equil ibrat ed acco rding t o e te r nal laws , o r a diamo nd, imper-
vi ous e xce pt unde r a li g ht falli ng di r e ctly fr om ab ove .
The lor d of the i s lands cam e towar d us i n a s hi p: the funne l
puffe d out b lue halos b e hi nd hi s he ad, m ag ni fyi ng the s m oke fr om
hi s pi pe and i m pr i nti ng i t on the s ky. And as the s hi p pi tche d and
t o ssed, his ro cking chair jerked o ut his wel co ming gest ures.
Fr om b e ne ath hi s tr ave li ng -r ug he dr e w four e g g s wi th pai nte d
47
= - R' ... ",": ,..-~,--
", ..-.. -
1'-
."., ~
s he lls , whi ch he hande d ove r to Doctor Faus tr oll afte r fi r s t taki ng
a dr i nk. In the flam e of the punch we we r e dr i nki ng , the hatchi ng
of the oval e m b r yos b r oke out ove r the i s land's s hor e : two di s tant
colum ns , the i s olati on of two pr i s m ati c tr i ni ti e s of Pan pi pe s ,
s playe d out i n the s pur t of the i r cor ni ce s the quadr i di g i tate hand-
s hake of the s onne t's quatr ai ns ; and our s ki ff r ocke d i ts ham m ock
i n the ne wb or n r e fle cti on of the tr i um phal ar ch. Di s pe r s i ng the
hai r y cur i os i ty of the fauns and the r os y b loom of the nym phs
ar ous e d fr om the i r r e ve r i e b y thi s m e lli fluous cr e ati on, the pale
m otor ve s s e l wi thdr e w i ts b lue b r e ath towar d the i s land's hor i zon,
wi th i ts je r ki ng chai r wavi ng g oodb ye .'
CONCE RNING THE ISLE OF HE R,
THE CYCLOPS, AND THE GRE AT SWAN
WHICH IS OF CRYSTAL
TO HENRI DE REGNIER
The i s le of He r , li ke the i s le of Ptyx, i s one s i ng le je we l, wi th out-
jutti ng octag onal for ti fi cati ons , r e s e m b li ng the b as i n of a fountai n
Si nce the wr i ti ng of thi s b ook, the r i ve r ar oond the i s land has tur ne d i nto a r une r al wr e ath.
[Author 's note .]
48
of jas pe r . The m ap g ave i t the nam e of the i s le of He r m , b e caus e
i t i s pag an and cons e cr ate d to Me r cur y; and the i nhab i tants calle d
i t the i s le of Har t, b e caus e of i ts m ag ni fi ce nt g ar de ns . Faus tr oll
i ns tr ucte d m e that one s hould i nte r pr e t a nam e only fr om i ts
anci e nt and authe nti c r oot, and that the s yllab le her, li ke the r oot
of a g e ne alog i cal tr e e , m e ans , m or e or le s s , Seignioral.
The i s land's s ur face i s of s ti ll wate r , m i r r or -li ke (i t was natur al
that the i s lands s hould appe ar to us as lake s , dur i ng our navi g ati on
ove r dr y land); and one cannot i m ag i ne a s hi p s ai li ng thr oug h i t,
unle s s i n the m anne r of a r i coche t s ki m m i ng the s ur face , for thi s
m i r r or r e fle cts no r i pple s , not e ve n i ts own. Ne ve r the le s s , the r e
s ai ls the r e a g r e at s wan, as pur e and s i m ple as a powde r puff, and
s om e ti m e s i t b e ats i ts wi ng s wi thout b r e aki ng the am b i e nt s i le nce .
Whe n the flutte r i ng of the fan i s r api d e noug h, one can g li m ps e
the whole i s land thr oug h i ts tr ans par e ncy, and the fall ope ns out
li ke a pavoni ne
1 9
je t of wate r .
It has ne ve r b e e n known for the g ar de ne r s of the i s le of He r
to allow the je t of a fountai n to fall ag ai n i nto the b as i n, for thi s
lVould dull the s ur face ; the b ouque ts of s pr ay hove r at a li ttle he i g ht
i n hor i zontal s he e ts li ke douds ; and the two par alle l m i r r or s of the
e ar th and the s ky pr e s e r ve the i r r e ci pr ocal e m pti ne s s li ke two m ag -
ne ts e te r nally face to face .
Al! conduct i n thi s land i s formal, as i n olde n ti m e s whe n thi s
wor d s i g ni fi e d c ustomary.
49
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skiff on fire (it was, despite its paraffin varnish, incombustible) and
from hanging Bos s e- de- Nage and mys elf - after robbing us -
from the main yard (the s kiff had no main yard).
We all fished for monkeys in a river, to the jaw~ gaping horror
ofBosse-de-Nage, and we visited the interior of the island.
Because the red glow of the volcano is blinding, one can soon
see no more than if one were surrounded by a shadowless dar k-
ness; but so that one may follow the opaque undulations of the
dazzling lava, there are children who run about the island with
lamps. They are born and die without ever growing old, in the
hulks of worm- eaten barges , on the bank of a bottle- green back-
water. Lamp shades wander there like glaucous and pink crabs; and
farther inland, whither we es caped as quickly as pos s ible becaus e
of the marine animals which ravage the seashore at ebb tide, their
particolored umbels s leep. The lamps and the volcano exhale a livid
light, like the port- s ide light of the Boat of the Dead.
After drinking, the captain, resplendent with his curling mus-
tachios, used his ship-boarding scimitar as a calamus and with an
ink made of gunpowder and gin tattooed upon the forehead of our
clos e- mouthed cabin boy thes e words in blue: BOSSE- DE- NAGE,
PAPIO CYNOCEPHALUS, relit his pipe in the lava, and gave orders
to the light- children to es cort the s kiff down to the s ea; and until
we reached the open sea we were accompanied by Kidd's words of
farewell and by the dim lights like lacklus ter jellyfis h.
52
CONCERNING THE GREAT CHURCH
OF SNOUTFIGS
TO LAURENT TAfLHADE
We could already hear bells - as loud as all the Brabantine chimes
of ebony, maple, oak, cedar, sorb wood and poplar from Ringing
is le - when I s uddenly found mys elf between two black walls ,
beneath an archway, then dazzled by the glare of a long s tained-
glass window. The doctor, without deigning to warn me, had shot
the skiff like an arrow, using the tiller's silken cords, into the cen-
ter of the great portal of Snoutfigs cathedral. Like the prefatory
cough of chair legs being s hifted, my oars grated on the flags tones
of the nave, along which our keel lay s ymmetrically.
Friar John climbed into the pulpit.
The awesome figure, warlike and sacerdotal, glared at the
as s embly. His chas uble was of chain mail, s tudded with balas
rubies and black diamonds. Instead of rosaries, an olive-wood cith-
ern dangled on his right hip, while at his left was s lung his great
two-handed sword, its hilt fashioned from a golden crescent, in its
s cabbard of horned- viper's s kin.
His sermon was rhetorical and very Latin, Attic, and Asiatic
at the same time; but I failed to understand why he was clanging
53
c..""c
., . , , ' .
...,
~',;' d'
and clinking from his sollcrcts to his gauntlets, nor could I com-
prehend his phrases, arranged like the rounds of a fencing bout.
Suddenly a bronze bullet was fired from a falconet bound to a
counter-faced slab by four iron chains, the shot ploughing open
the orator's right temple and splitting his armet as far as his ton-
sure, laying bare the optic nerve and the right lobe of the brain,
but without affecting that s tronghold of unders tanding.
Just as the smoke rose from the falconet, a pungent steam was
exhaled from the throats of the congregation and congealed into
the s hape of a s quat mons ter at the foot of the pulpit.
That day, I s aw the Snout. It is res pectable and well-
proportioned, in every way comparable to the hermit crab or
pagurian, as God is infinitely similar to man. It has horns which
serve it as a nose and as tongue-papillae, shaped like long fingers
issuing from its eyes; two claws of uneven length and ten legs in
all; and being, like the pagurian, vulnerable only in its fundament,
it hides this and its rudimentary sex in a concealed shell.
Friar John drew his great sword, making as if to attack the
Snout, to the clear anxiety of those present. Faustroll remained
impassive and Bosse-de-Nage, inordinately interested, forgot him-
s elf s o far as to think vis ibly:
"Ha hal"
But he said not a word, for fear of outrunning his thoughts.
The Snout retreated, the point of its shell first, while every-
one drew back; and its claws grated together like stammering
54
mouths. The sword blade, flashing as it was drawn from its horned-
viper's skin sheath, blunted itself against the creature's hairy
codpiece.
At this point, Faus troll s et the s kiff in motion. By pulling his
guide ropes harder, he was able to bend the s kiff appreciably; this
was pos s ible becaus e his tiller did not s imply cQntrol a flat rudder
aft but bent the long keel, from the fore- end, to right, to left,
upward or downward, according to his directional requirements.
And the s ail of taut copper glowed like a cres cent moon. With
myself manipulating my suction disks to adhere to the granite's
dangerously polished surface, the doctor led me toward the mon-
ster. And in its roundabout route our navigation twisted back on
itself like the wedding ring of an amphisbaena's Narcissus kiss.
By this artifice, Friar John was easily able to meet the Snout
at its own level, the monster having advanced slightly while its
advers ary des cended the twelve s teps . He winkled it from its s hell
with the forked tip of his s word, and chopped its fundament into
as many pieces as there were people present in the nave; but nei-
ther he nor we ourselves, except Bosse-de-Nage, wanted to taste
this offering.
And the combat would have been the very image, in all its
vicis s itudes , of a bullfight if the bull Shell- Bottom had made a
direct onslaught instead of attempting a thrust at the end of its
circular flight.
However, the bejeweled preacher remounted the pulpit for his
5 5
~~;;;;;;.~-~.-
'" ., , -"
.. "
.'''.':;.;
s ermon. And his flock, no longer pos s es s ed by the Snout's s pirit,
were purged of their cras s humor and applauded him.
As for us , we departed once more toward the nearby bells of
Ringing is le, and Faus troll did not cons ult the s tars further, for
our way was lit by the beams of the great windows , irides cent as
words , beams like s tarry paths leading from the church.
CONCERNING THE RINGING ISLE
TO CLAUDE TERRA SSE
"Happy the s age," s ays the Chi- Hing, "in the valley where he lives ,
a reclus e, who delights to hear the s ound of cymbals ; alone, in his
bed, awakening, he exclaims : Never, I s wear, s hall I forget the
happines s that I feel!"
The lord of the is land, after welcoming us in thes e terms , led
us to his plantations which were fortified by aeolian marker poles
of bamboo. The commones t plants there were the s ide- drums , the
ravanas tron, s ambuca, archlute and bandore, the kin and the tche,
the beggar's - guitar and vina, the magrepha and hydraulus . In a
cons ervatory there aros e the many necks and geys er breath of the
s team- organ given to Pippin in 757 by Cons tantine Copronymus ,
56
and imported into Ringing is le by Saint Cornelius of Compiegne.
Here one could breathe in the perfume of the piccolo, oboe
d'amore, contrabas s oon and s arrus ophone, the Brittany bagpipe,
zampogna and Englis h bagpipe; the Bengali chere, bombardon, s er-
pent, coelophone, s axhorn and anvil.
The temperature of the is land is regulated by cons ulting ther-
mometers called s irens . At the winter s ols tice the atmos pheric
s onority drops from a eat's curs ing to the buzzing of was ps and
bumblebees and the vibration of a fly's wing. At the s ummer s ol-
s tice, all the above- named flowers blos s om, reaching a pitch of
overs hrill ardor like that of ins ects hovering over the plants of our
native fields . At night, here, Saturn clas hes together his s is trum
and his ring. And, at dawn and twilight, the s un and moon explode
like divorced cymbals .
"Ha, ha," began Bos s e- de- Nage, wanting to tryout his voice
before joining in the univers al mus ical refrain; but the two heav-
enly bodies clas hed together in a kis s of reconciliation and the
planter celebrated this clangorous event thus :
"Happy the s age," he cried, "who, on a mountain s lope,
delights to hear the s ound of cymbals ; alone in his bed on awaken-
ing, he s ings : Never, I s wear, s hall my des ires go beyond what I
already pos s es s !"
And Faus troll, before taking leave, drank with him wormwood
dis tilled on the mountain tops , and the s kiff exhaled its chromatic
cours e at the beat of my oars . Toward the two heavenly bodies
57
, , ~~. ':"1t"""!~""':>
, ", ., , -, , , ., , '
- ""
s triking the hours of union and divis ion of the black key and the
diurnal key, a little naked child and a white- haired ancient s ang on
two lofty columns ; toward this double dis k of s ilver and of gold
they s ang:
Node di_e que biba
mus
The old man bellowed the s election of foul s yllables , and the
s eraphic s oprano took up the refrain accompanied by the choir of
angels , Thrones , Powers and Dominions : ((. . . pet , a- mar mar, ac-
cu- pet , cu) pet ) a- mar oc- cu, semper nos amor occupet . "
The white- bearded energumen concluded the coprolalic phras e
with a throaty cry and an obs cene contortion; at this moment, from
our s kiff, which was moored at the foot of this chubby and child-
like body's s tele, we could s ee the crumbling of his armor made of
enameled cardboard or puppeteer's pas teboard and the blooming
of the forty- five- year- old s is tine dwarfs s qualid beard.
From his throne perfumed with harps , the lord of the is land
gloried that his creation was good, and as we drew away we could
hear this melody:
"Happy the s age who, on the hill where he dwells , delights to
hear the s ound of cymbals ; alone in his bed, in awakening, he lies
58
in tranquillity and s wears that he will never reveal to the vulgar the
reas on for his joy!"
CONCERNING THE HERMETIC SHADES AND
THE KING WHO AWAITED DEATH
TO RACHlLDE
After pas s ing the river Ocean, which, as regards the s tability of its
s urface, much res embles a great s treet or boulevard, we reached
the land of the Cimmerii and the hermetic Shades , which differ
from this river as two non- liquid planes may differ - that is to s ay,
in s ize and in divis ion. The place where the s un s ets has the appear-
ance, between the folds compris ing the Town's mes entery, of the
vermiform appendix of a caecum. It abounds in blind alleys and
cuIs - de- s ac, s ome of which expand into caverns . In one of thes e
the day- s tar was wont to puff its elf up. For the firs t time I under-
s tood that it was pos s ible to reach the unders urface of the tangible
horizon and s ee the s un from s o clos e up.
There is a mons trous toad whos e mouth is flus h with the
Ocean's s urface and whos e function is to devour the s unken dis k,
the way the moon eats the clouds . It genuflects daily in its circular
59
- - - - - - - - - - -
'. 1. 1'0-
t';:
'- ',
communion; at this moment steam rises from its nostrils, and the
great flame arises which is the souls of certain people. This is what
Plato called the apportionment by lots of s ouls outs ide the pole.
And its genuflection, because of the structure of its limbs, is also
a squatting. The duration of its deglutitory jubilation is therefore
without dimension; and since it digests to the rhythm of a vigorous
punctuality, its intestines remain unconscious of the transitory star
which, in any case, is indigestible. It burrows a passage in the sub-
terranean diversity of the earth and emerges from the opposite
pole, where it purges itself of the excrements with which it has
s oiled its elf. It is from this detritus that the devil Plural is born.
In the land where the sun is eternally dormant, there is a king
who is its officer of the guard and due to share its fate, awaiting
death each day; he believes that a night will some time remain
perennial, and inquires after the evacuations of the toad on the
horizon. But he has no time to consider the star hastening, its belly
wobbling, into the adjoining cavern: he carries a mirror on his
navel which gives him a reflection of it. His sole pastime is built
from a house of cards, to which he adds a story each morning;
here, once a month, the lords of the transpontine islands come to
debauch themselves. When the castle is capped with one story too
many the star will flash through it in its course, and that will be a
cons iderable cataclys m. But the king has been s ufficiently judicious
not to build it on the ecliptic plane. And the cas tle keeps its bal-
ance in exact proportion to its height.
Since evening was descending as Bosse-de-Nage drew our skiff
up on to the bank, the king was awaiting death as usual, and the
toad was gaping functionally. The palace was s wathed in blacknes s ;
couches had been prepared for the bodies , and philters to deaden
the consciousness of agony. Bosse-de-Nage, though not profess-
ing it by a thoughtles s ly variegated loquacity, prided hims elf on
being deontological, and thought hims elf in honor bound to dres s
up in a black cos tume and to crown his s kull - which res embled
an ill-favored cucurbit - with a Belgian hat capable of storing up
luminous vibrations in wave lengths equal to those of his costume,
the crown of which res embled half a defunct globe.
And the night computed its hours s o exactly that lamps had to
be lit.
Suddenly the toad's des cending colon thundered, and the non-
alimentary bolus of pure fire took its usual path once more toward
the pole of the devil Plural.
In a striking metamorphosis the mourning color of the hang-
ings turned into pale ros e. The philters were drunk joyfully
through the reeds of Panpipes, and when little women were laid
out on the red- hot couches , Bos s e- de- Nage thought the time had
come to bring matters to a point:
"Ha ha!" he declared in a summary fashion, but he saw that
we had gues s ed his thoughts , and watched with great s urpris e the
s implicity of his Belgian hat roll upon the carpet with the recalci-
trant din of an sweep's iron brush.
60
61
- - -
~, ., , ~.'
.~.
";'1
TO PAUL VALERY
coasting along the pavements of a dusty square. As far as I could
understand, the doctor was talking about the earth's tides, and I
thought that one of us must be drunk, and that the ground was
sinking toward its nadir, like a fathomless depth revealed in a
nightmare. I know now that apart from the flux of its humors and
the dias tole and s ys tole which pump its circulatory blood, the earth
is bulging with intercostal muscles and breathes according to the
moon's rhythm. But the regularity of this breathing is very gentle,
and few people are aware of it.
Faustroll took some astral measurements, the visibility through
the albugineous sky over this narrow street being excellent, and
told me to note down the fact that the terrestrial radius had already
shrunk 1.4 x 10-
6
centimeters, through the subsidence in the
reflux_ He then gave orders to Bosse-de-Nage to cast anchor,
assuring us that the sole pretext, worthy of his Doctrine, for an
end to our drifting journey was that the thicknes s of the earth
beneath our feet as far as its center was no longer deep enough to
satisfy our honor.
Now it was midday, the alley's narrow length as deserted as
an empty belly; and we put into port, as it was easy to tell by the
numbers on the wall, in front of the four thous and and fourth
house of the rue de Venise_
Between the ground levels with their floors of beaten earth,
overlooked by doors wider than the s treet but les s agape than
women waiting on the uniformity of their beds, Faustroll raised the
BOOK FOUR
C l E l P l I l I A l L i E D J F .l .G Y
CONCERNING THE LAND- TIDE AND THE
MARINE BISHOP MENDACIOUS
FauSlroll took his leave while the night was s till hanging, like a
pope, from four of the cardinal points . And as I as ked him why he
did not stay drinking until the sun's next sudden plunge, he arose
in the s kiff and, with his foot on the neck of Bos s e- de- Nage, made
soundings along our route.
He confided to me that he was afraid of being caught unawares
by the ebb tide, s ince the period of s yzygy was nearing its end. And
I was seized with fear, because we were still rowing where there
was no water, between the aridity of the houses, and soon we were
62
63
ques tion of berthing the s kiff in s ome deep s helter. Suddenly he
pointed, and I was not very surprised to see arise from the thresh-
old of one of the barest and most sordid hovels a marine personage
abstracted from book XIII of Aldrovandi's M 01lStersj having the
appearance of a bis hop, and, more particularly the type of bis hop
which was at one time, according to the book, fis hed up off the
coas t of Poland.
His miter was of fish scales and his cross like the corymb of a
reflexed tentacle; his chasuble, which I touched, was all encrusted
with s tones from the depths and could eas ily be lifted up in the
front and at the back, but, becaus e of the chas te adherence of the
cutis , hardly at all above the knees .
The marine bishop Mendacious made an obeisance before
Faustroll, presented to Bosse-de-Nage an ear fig
24
gratis, and when
the s kiff was intruded into the vaulted berth and the door's valve
closed once more, he presented me to Visited, his daughter, and
to his two sons, Distinguished and Extravagant. Then he inquired
of us whether it would be agreeable to us, quite succinctly, to:
DR INK
TO PIERRE aUILLARD
However, Faus troll lifted with his fork toward his teeth five
hams, whole, roasted, and boned, from Strasbourg, Bayonne, the
Ardennes , York and Wes tphalia, all dripping with Johannis berger;
the bis hop's daughter, on her knees under the table, filled once
again each unit of the ascending line of hectoliter cups in the mov-
ing belt which cros s ed the table in front of the doctor and pas s ed,
empty of its contents, near the raised throne of Bosse-de-Nage. I
gave myself a thirst by swallowing a sheep that had been roasted
alive while racing along a petrol-soaked track until done to a turn.
Dis tinguis hed and Extravagant drank as thirs tily as anhydrous
sulphuric acid, as their names had made me suspect, and three of
their jowls would have encompassed a cubic meter of firewood.
However, Bishop Mendacious refreshed himself exclusively with
fresh water and rat's piss.
At one time he had been in the habit of mixing this las t s ub-
stance with bread and Melun cheese, but had succeeded in
suppressing the supererogatory vanity of these solid condiment~ .
He sucked in water from a decanter of gold beaten as thin as the
wave length of green light, s erved on a tray made of the fur {rather
64
65
I:~;~~-r-~'-"
~""'~
than peltry, s ince the bis hop wanted to be fas hionable), of the
fres hly flayed fox of a drunkard,25 in s eas on, and quite equal to a
twentieth of the latter's weight. Such luxury is not vouchs afed to
all: the bis hop kept rats at enormous expens e, and als o, in rooms
paved with funnels , a whole s eraglio of drunkards , whos e conver~
s ation he imitated:
"Do you think," he s aid to Faus troll, "that a woman can ever
be naked? In what do you recognize the nakednes s of a wall?"
"When it is devoid of windows , doors , and other openings ,"
opined the doctor.
"Your reas oning is good," continued Mendacious . "Naked
women are never naked, es pecially old women. "
He drank a great draught s traight out of his carafe, whos e
point of s us tentation was erect on its vis cous carpet, like a root
torn from its burial place. The catenulate conveyor belt of cups
full of liquid or wind chanted like the incis ion made III a river's
belly by the ros ary of an illuminated towboat.
"Now," continued the bis hop, "drink and eat. Vis ited, s erve
us with s ome lobs ter!"
"Was it not once fas hionable in Paris ," I hazarded, "to offer
thes e animals in courtes y, like a s nufrtaker proffering his s nuff~
box? But, from what I have heard, people were in the habit of
refus ing them, claiming that they were hairy pluripedes and repul-
s ively dirty. "
"Ho- hum, ho- hum," condes cended the bis hop. "If lobs ters are
dirty and non- depilated, it is perhaps a proof that they are free. A
nobler fate than that of the can of corned beef which you carryon
a ribbon round your neck, doctor navigator, like the cas e of a pair
of s alted binoculars through which you like to s crutinize people
and objects .
"But, lis ten:
THE LOBSTER AND THE CAN" OF CORNED BEEF
WHICH DOCTOR FAUSTROLL
WORE ROUND HIS NECK
Fable
TO A.-F. HEROLD
A can of corned beef, chained like a lorgnette,
Saw a lobs ter pas s by which res embled her fraternally.
He was armored with a hard s hell
On which was written that ins ide, like hers elf, he was free
of bones ,
(Boneless and economicaD;26
And beneath his curved tail
He was probably hiding a key with which to open her.
Loves tricken, the s edentary corned beef
Declared to the little automobile can of living potted meat
66
67
. . . _- ,. . ---,
"q" ".
~:
~ ';
That if he would deign to become acclimatized,
By her s ide, in the world's s hopwindows ,
He s hould be decorated with s everal gold medals ,"
"Ha ha," meditated Bos s e- de- Nage, but he did not develop
his ideas more comprehens ively.
And Faus troll interrupted the frivolity of the convers ation with
an important s peech.
CAPITALLY
Doctor Faus troll commenced:
"I do not believe that an uncons cious murder is therefore nec-
es s arily motiveles s : it is not governed by any command emanating
from us and has no link with the precedent phenomena of our ego,
but it certainly follows an external order, it is within the order of
external phenomena, and it has a caus e that is perceptible by the
s ens es and is therefore s ignificant.
"I have never had the des ire to kill except after s eeing a horse's
head, which has become for me a s ign, or an order, or more pre-
cis elya s ignal, like the down- turned thumb in the arena, that the
time has come to s trike the blow; and les t you s hould s mile, I s hall
68
explain to you that there are doubtles s s everal reas ons for this .
"The s ight of a very ugly object certainly provokes one to do
what is ugly. Now, what is ugly is evil. The s ight of a revolting
condition incites one to revolting pleas ures . The appearance of a
ferocious muzzle with the bones s howing impels one to a ferocious
act and the s tripping of the bones . Now, there is no object in the
whole world as ugly as the head of a hors e, except perhaps that of
the gras s hopper, which is almos t exactly s imilar without having the
gigantic s ize of the former. And you know that the murder of
Chris t was fores hadowed by the following fact: that Mos es , s o that
the Scriptures might be accomplis hed, had permitted the eating of
the bruchus , the attacus , the ophiomachus and 10cus t,27 which are
the four s pecies of gras s hopper. "
"Ha hal" interpos ed Bos s e- de- Nage by way of digres s ion, but
he could find no valid objection.
"And furthermore," continued Faus troll imperturbably, "the
gras s hopper is not altogether a mons trous animal, having normally
developed members , whereas the hors e, born for indefinite defor-
mation, has already, s ince the origin of its s pecies , although
endowed originally by nature with four feet furnis hed with fingers ,
s ucceeded in repudiating a certain number of its fingers and
in jumping about on four s olitary hooves , exaggerated and horny,
like a piece of furniture s liding on four rollers . The hors e is a
planchette.
"But the head alone, although I cannot define my reas ons -
69
--.~-.'~'.
'" .~ ;-
", -", ".
perhaps becaus e of the s imple enormity of its teeth and the abom-
inable rictus natural to it - is for me the s ign of all ferocity or
rather the s ign of death. And the Apocalyps e s aid precis ely in
s ignifying the fourth s courge that: 'Death was mounted upon a
pale hors e. ' Which I interpret thus : 'thos e whom Death comes to
vis it s ee firs t the head of the hors e. ' And the war's homicides
derive from equitation.
"Now, if you are curious to know why I am rarely incited to
murder in the s treet, where the horrible head mulciplies in from of
all the vehicles , I would reply that a s ignal, to be heard, mus t be
is olated, and that a multitude does not pos s es s the ability to give
an order. And jus t as a thous and drums do not make as much nois e
as a s ingle drum, and a thous and intelligences form a mob moved
by ins tinct, s o an individual is not an individual for me when he
appears in the company of s everal of his equals , and I maintain that
a head is only a head when s eparated from its body.
"And Baron Munchaus en was never braver at war and better
at killing than on the day when, the portcullis s urmounted, he
noticed that he had left half of his mount on the other s ide of the
s harp girder. "
"Ha ha!" exclaimed Bos s e- de- Nage appropriately; but Bis hop
Mendacious interrupted him to conclude:
"Well, doctor, s o long as we never talk with you in the
pres ence of a decapitated hors e - and up to the pres ent time
the s olipedes are cut up rather than guillotined - we may be
70
permitted to cons ider your murderous temptations as an agreeable
paradox. "
Then he s ent us to s leep with a macaronic Greek harangue, in
which, tos s ing my head, I could only make out the las t perfect
propOSlClon:
"
. 2:E2:0YMeAI. "28
CONCERNING THE DEATH OF A NUMBER OF
PEOPLE. AND MORE ESPECIALLY
OF BOSSE-DE-NAGE
TO MONSIEUR DEIBLER, SYHPATHETlCALL Y
The little s quat mower arrived and s tarted to work. He gave
s uch s trokes with his s cythe that he filled a quarter of a wag-
onful of hay, or more, s o vigorous was he; and what is more,
he took no pleas ure in s harpening his s cythe; but when its
blade was dulled he drew icalong his teech, with a s ound like
fro 0 0 0 0 c. Thus he s aved time.
- BEROALDE DE VERVILLE.
HOW TO SUCCEED, XXIV.29
After drinking, we took a walk through foggy s treets , with
Mendacious in the lead. Since the epis copal nature of his ves tments
7l
., , ~~.., -.- ..
"'.
WI"';
'- ", ~.
gave people the impression that he was probably an honest man,
no one except the doctor and myself noticed that he was unhook-
ing the shop signs with his crosier, as if inadvertently, and giving
them graciously to Bosse-de-Nage to carry, the latter thanking him
with the single word: "ha ha," for, as one knows, he was opposed
to all idle verbiage.
And I was not yet aware of the bis hop's charity in allowing the
s hop s igns to fall down.
Suddenly the crosier's curling head began to uncurl, faced with
the toughnes s of a gilt molding
lO
above a hors e- butcher's s hop.
The gliding flight hovered as an animal mas k and as a twofold gaze
from above and below.
Faus troll, very calm, lit a s mall perfumed candle which burned
for seven days.
The firs t day, the flame was red, and revealed the categorical
poison in the air, and the death of all scavengers and soldiers.
The second day, of women.
The third, of s mall children.
The fourth day, there was a remarkable epizootic disease
among those quadrupeds considered edible on condition that they
were ruminative and possessed a cloven hoof.
The s affron combus tion of the fifth day decimated all cuck-
olds and bailiff's clerks , but I was of a s uperior grade.
The blue crackling of the s ixth day has tened the impending
end of all bicyclists, of all those at least, without exception, who
72
fasten their trouser cuffs with lobster claws.
The light changed into smoke on the seventh day, and
Faus troll had a breathing s pace.
Mendacious unhooked the shop signs with his hands, after ask-
ing for a leg- up from Bos s e- de- Nage.
And the fog dis s ipated weightles s ly in centrifugal directions ,
before the arch of a riding school's great door; and Faustroll was
overtaken again by insanity.
The bis hop took to his heels , but not quickly enough to pre-
vent Faustroll from tearing off his miter while it was still alive;
whereas I was not molested by the doctor, for I was armored with
my name Panmuphle.
But Faus troll crouched over the baboon, s preading his four
limbs out on the ground and s trangling him from behind. Bos s e-
de- N age made a s ign that he wis hed to s peak, and, when the
doctor had relaxed the grip of his fingers , s aid in two words :
"Ha hal" and these were the last two words he uttered.
73
n. '.
in;'" ro--"--
~l ~."
CONCERNING SOME FURTHER AND MORE
EVIDENT MEANINGS OF THE WORDS H A H A
. . And I'll declare
He's mooning up s ome lands cap'd alley where
A ha ha lurks ahead. All unaware
He won't, until he's tumbled, know it's there.
- PIRON
31
We may properly (feat here of the cus tomary and s uccinct s peech
of Bos s e- de- Nage, s o that it may be made clear that it is with rea-
s onable intention and not from mockery that we have always
reported it in its full extent, together with the mos t probable caus e
of its premature interruption.
"HA HA," he s aid concis ely; but we are in no way concerned
with the accidental fact that he us ually added nothing more.
In the firs t ins tance, it is more judicious to us e the
orthography AA, for the as piration h was never written in the
ancient languages of the world. It proclaimed in Bos s e- de- Nage
effort, s ervile and obligatory labor, and the cons cious nes s of his
inferiority.
A juxtapos ed to A, with the former obvious ly equal to the lat-
ter, is the formula of the principle of identity: a thing is its elf. It is
at the s ame time the mos t excellent refutation of this very propos i-
74
tion, s ince the two A'S differ in s pace, when we write them, if not
indeed in time, jus t as two twins are never born together - even
when is s uing from the obs cene hiatus of the mouth of Bos s e- de-
Nage.
The firs t A was perhaps congruent to the s econd, and we will
therefore willingly write thus : A = A.
Pronounced quickly enough, until the letters become con-
founded, it is the idea of unity.
Pronounced s lowly, it is the idea of duality, of echo, of dis -
tance, of s ymmetry, of greatnes s and duration, of the two
principles of good and evil.
But this duality proves als o that the perception of Bos s e- de-
Nage was notorious ly dis continuous , not to s ay dis continuous and
analytical, uns uited to all s ynthes es and to all adequations .
One may confidently as s ume that he could only perceive s pace
111 two dimens ions , and was refractory to the idea of progres s ,
implying, as it does , a s piral figure.
It would be a complicated problem to s tudy, in addition,
whether the firs t A was the efficient caus e of the s econd. Let us
content ours elves with noting that s ince Bos s e- de- Nage us ually
uttered only AA and nothing more (AAA would be the medical for-
mula Amalgamat e), he had evidently no notion of the Holy Trinity,
nor of all things triple, nor of the undefined, which commences at
three, nor of the indeterminate, nor of the Univers e, which may
be defined as the Several.
75
~:~r!l
Nor of anyone else. And, in fact, the day he was married, he
indeed felt that his wife was chas te with him, but he could not tell
whether she was a virgin.
And in his public life he never understood the use, on the
boulevards, of those iron kiosks whose popular name derives from
the fact that they are divided into three triangular prisms and that
one can use only one-third at a time;32 and he remained, until his
death, branded thus by Captain Kidd:
BOSSE- DE- NAGE
Papio cynocephalus,
befouling and ravaging everything indiscriminately.
We have purposely omitted to say, these meanings being very
well- known, that ha ha is a ditched gap in a wall at the end of a gar-
den path, an armed pit or military well into which chrome steel
bridges may collaps e, and that AA may s till be read on the medals
s truck at Metz. If Faus troll's s kiff had had a bows prit, ha ha would
have des ignated a s pecial s ail placed beneath the jibs
33
76
BOOK FIVE
({:])lFlF[CL~.[.[.Y
CONCERNING A THOUSAND VARIED MATTERS
TO PIERRE LOTI
But the bis hop, decapitated of his miter, was in a bad way of bus i-
ness, being unaccustomed to attend to matters nisi in pontificalibus.
For which reason, he entered his closet, victualled with a thousand
varied matters suitable to encourage a crap.
On the little table where ordinarily rolls of paper unfold them-
s elves , a fat little bus t of a jolly little man with a s crubby little beard
paraded in beetle- green.
The jolly little man waddles from right to left on the hemis -
pericity of his bas e, and the bis hop would have recognized, had he
been a member of the expedition at that time, the sprinting legless
77
cripple expelled from Fragrant is le. I found out later that he had
met him, at less expense and looking even more like himself, on
the vulgar clock in the s itting room of an old lady. The palmate
legles s cripple rais ed hims elf up on the artificial heels of his bowl
and offered the bis hop courteous ly a pad of s quared paper as an
ahstersive:
"I had reserved it for my mother," he said, "but" (pointing to
the bishop's amethyst), "as is the case with her, the Christian faith
permits you to read with serenity the most somber subjects. You have not
yet made use of my services in this way, but you will see that it is
even more me. "34
"This paper is then going ... ?" said the bishop.
"Read perseveringly with all your eyes, nay even with your
most secret eye. This paper is sovereign. It would b .. , you so, if
only you knew!"35
"You have decided me," said Mendacious.
"Take your place, then, among these piles of less efficacious
s uppos itories . It is time: I alone can st ill dist inguish behind nearly all
these accumulated words THE BOTTOMLESS ABYSS. "36
He jumped nimbly into the des ignated pit, and like an iron
gauntlet sliding down the banisters of a staircase, the reverbera-
tion of his zinc bowl died away along the double turn of the
depos itory pipe: but the vers es of Mes s rs . Deroulede and Yan-
Nibor,37 rolled inside this concave mirlitoll, supported him with
their feet.
78
Reading by t he Bishop
while going about his business.
DEATH OF LATENT OBSCURE
"Brr. .. brr... brr brrr. .. chen ... hatsch ... Latellt Obscure
is leaving us. .. Brrr brrr... The moment of agOllY has been con-
summat ed ... brr . . . brr . . . The moment ary oblivion induced by sleep.
A vers e. Must she t hen die Lat ent Obscure Heuh eheuh . . . It
is freezillg hard ... general sillister impression brr brr she is
already halfway int o t he abyss. . heuh heuh Bit t er t ears t he
doct or says t hat she will not last t he night ... Off with you, frog! down
into the s hades below. - Her life is drawing t o a close" {Veiled
drum}. "The cold bores into olle's bones" (bis). "Tra ratatad" (The
bis hop hums joyous ly. ) "In the train of a regiment, our fait hful
Melanie, who comes from a st ock of devot ed old servant s, who have
pract ically become members of t he family ... "
"Courage, you are doing fine," cried out the little man from
below. "Carryon, do not be afraid of inconveniencing me: 1 shall
sleep right next door in the Arab room. "
"The bitter struggle of the end, " agreed the bishop, still reading;
"brrr... brrr... agonizing nightmare. Horrible moment. Let us read
with the other side's eye: the last ritual cleansing, the poor corpse, the
horrible lit t le bed, t he great bed, t he pale forehead, t he dear face, t his t er-
rib/e lit t le bed."
79
"-, . . . -
~"I ...
"These GREEN PALMS," continued the bishop remorselessly,
"placed crosswise on the breast... "
"Thank you for your good wishes," telephoned the inhabitant
of the pipe. "I am delighted to see that you are not leaving us yet,
seated at the top of my chimney. The pale pale winter'5 day. . serene
countenance... supreme image, so pretty!"
"Vague impressions,)J continued Mendacious modestly.
"The pale features, the gentle smile! Latent Obscure smiles so
5Oftly...
"Heuh! eheuh ... Obsessive impression, infinitely sad... Brrr ...
brr ... ratatat! I 3 r r
"We rise and descend like ghosts," panted the leaves in their suc-
cesslve service.
"The dear voices and the dear sounds. . good smiling eyes, so
sad... "
"LATENT OBSCURE HAS LEFT US!!! thanks be to God,"
exclaimed the bishop, getting up.
"Thanks," echoed the little man. "A warm sun. Open windows.
Big cupboard, tiny box. I am smoking an oriental cigarette!"
"Perhaps this is the last time, " said the bishop sitting down again,
suddenly forced to resume his reading, and reading with extreme
concentration, "that regret for Latent Obscure welled up in me with that
inten5ity and in that peculiar form which bring5 tean, for all i5 5uddenly
calm, all becomes normal, forgotten, and there is a veil, a mist, an ash,
something indescribable thrown as if in haste, brrrrr ... and suddenly,
80
~wr r);",c
i
( \"(t'J ;\
"",t -\ J \ v, fJ~ ;"' \ ~Il~c: .I' blC"
"'~:c+/'!e. W
1
!o.A S' -' -e' 5
' vc.CLv\ ' . , s <..n;;;;.: v \ " ,
of the memory of those beings who have returned to the ETERNAL - r V" & f(. d
NOTHINGNESS, rat, tat, ratatat ... Bounty! bounty! In splashes,
in fire and in blood! After the fashion of the rhinoceros. W ithout
stopping. T~e rosary for the dead. Brrr. .. brr ... I' m hyplotiz-
ing
38
myself. HOMhu, no-nul Long as a lance."
"Is your name Kaka-San?" asked the little man after a certain
while.
"No, Mendacious, marine bishop, at your service. W hy?"
"Because Kaka-San did some very dirty things in her box during the
quite pardonable unconstraint of her last hours. "39
CONCERNING THE MUSICAL J ET
"How do they call thee?"
"CharoiMlIad," quoth Pan urge.
- PANTAGRUEL, III, 25
Now, it is necessary to know that the valve installed at the neck of
tne pit' s mouth was of thin rubber; and to be familiar with the dis-
coveries of Mr. Chichester Bell, cousin of Mr. Graham Bell, the
illustrious inventor of the telephone, one should be aware that a
stream of water falling upon an india-rubber sheet stretched over
the upper end of a tube constitutes a microphone, that a liquid jet
81
f!I'"8- . _. . :;~~. r -~'":""
,,'
,,) .
~'. "
breaks up at certain rates more easily than at others and, according
to its nature, will respond to certain sounds in prefere11ce to others; finally,
one should not be scandalized if we mention that the bishop' s loins
secreted this quite unconsciously musical jet whose amplified vibra-
tions he perceived at the moment of taking leave of his reading.
Voices of little women* arose, glorifying the little man.
THE LITTLE WOMEN (piano, common time, three sharps), some
of them GENTLY (E-G-e-E . B-E-B pedal):
"May your grief be soothed by our songs! (F-A ,harp). Others:
May your dire sorrow (G-B ,harp). Flyaway to the low murmur of
the waves (five flat" pedal, CRYSTALLINE) ...
"Stranger ( G natural-B), if you would charm our solitude, one
must change your name ( GENTLY) whose syllables are too rude,
And give you another (A flat) like the mountain flowers ( G ,harp, B
natura0 "
Some women propose the name: "Atari." Others: "Fei." The
L. W. : "No! (Pedal. Two quaver-rest,) Lo-ti (B-F , pedal, organ note)."
The L. W. : "Henceforth (ped. ped.) let him be named Lo-ti."
All surrounding him: "It is the moment of baptism! ( RATHER
SOLEMNLY). In the land of songs, In the land of loving (crotchet-
rest), Lo-ti (E flat, e, crotchet-rest, cresc.), Lo-: (e) ti (E flat) shall be
your supreme name ( SIC)."
Sic. Tlie hll' of Drl'Jm!, lyric by Reyna/do Hahn. words by P. Loli, A. Alo:,mdre and G. Harlmann.
[Author' s note.]
82
THE LITTLE W OMEN ( CONT.): "In the land of songs, In the
land of loving, Loti, Loti shall be your supreme name (two crotchet-
rest'). Lo-ti (E flat, E flat) we name you, Lo-ti we name you, and ( p.
p.) we ble- ( ill the key of b flat) -ess you! (Great uproar). "
The valve opened, the music ceased; the aspersion being com-
pleted, the bishop resecured his ring, and laid on hands,
confirming by this approved gesture the benediction of the L. w.
Then he simply cut off the jet.
HOW ONE OBTAINED CANVAS
TO PIERRE BONNARD
Faustroll carried out a subfumigation, and the specter of Bosse-de-
Nage - who, having only existed imaginarily, could not really die
- manifested itself, said ' ~ha ha" respectfully, then was silent,
awaiting orders.
I discovered that day a new meaning of this invaluable word,
namely that the cx, beginning of all things, is interrogative, for it
awaits an exposition in present space, and the appendix, greater
than itself, of a sequence in duration .
83
. ~ . . ,. .
"Here are a few billions in cash," said the doctor, rummaging
in his ruby-buttoned waistcoat pockets. "You will ask a policeman
the way to the National Department Store, called Au Luxe
Bourgeois,40 and there you will buy several ells of canvas.
"You will convey my compliments to the department managers
Bouguereau, Bonnat, Detaille, Henner, J .-P. Laurens and
Tartempion, to their horde of assistants and to the other subsidiary
salesmen. And so as not to waste time in the grip of their haggling,
you will, without a word ... "
"Apart from ha ha," I insinuated maliciously.
" ... Pour over each of them a pile of gold, until their mouths
are silenced beneath its rising tide. A sufficient payment will be
seventy-six million guineas for M. Bouguereau; seventeen thou-
sand seraphs for M. Henner; eighty thousand maravedi for M.
Bonnat, since his canvas is stamped, in place of a trademark, with
the figure of a poor man; thirty-eight dozen florins for M. ] .-P.
Laurens; forty-three centimes for M. Tartempion; and five billion
francs, as well as a tip in kopeks, for M. Detaille. You will throw
the remaining coppers into the faces of the other clowns. 1 )
"Ha ha," said Bosse-de-Nage to show that he had understood,
and prepared to depart.
"This is all very well," I said to Faustroll, "but would it not be
more honorable to allocate this gold toward the costs of my pro-
ceedings, and if necessary abstract the quantities of canvas by sheer
cunning?"
84
"I will explain to you what my gold really is," said the doctor,
winking. And to Bosse.de-Nage:
"One last word: so as to wash the shoptalk out of your prog-
nathous jaws, enter a small room arranged for this purpose. There
the ikons of the Saints shine forth. Bare your head before the Poor
F isherman, bow before the Monets, genuflect before the Degas and
the W histlers, grovel in the presence of Cezanne, prostrate your-
self at the feet of Renoir and lick the sawdust of the spittoons at
the foot of the frame of Olympia''''1
"Ha ha," agreed Bosse-deNage wholeheartedly, and his
hurried exit carried with it the most ardent protestations of his zeal.
Turning toward me, the doctor continued:
"W hen Vincent van Gogh had unluted his crucible, and cooled
the integrated matter of the true philosopher' s stone, and when,
on this first day of the world, all things were transmuted into the
sovereign metal at the contact of the marvelous become real, the
artisan of the Great W ork contented himself with running his
strong fingers through the pointed sumptuousness of his luminous
beard, and said: ' How beautiful is yellow!,42
"I could easily transmute al! things, for I also possess this
stone" ( he showed it to me, set in one of his rings), "but I have
found by experiment that the benefit extends only to those whose
brain is that selfsame stone" ( through a watchglass embedded
in the fontanel of his skull he showed me this stone a second
time) ...
85
,,: '"' ~. ' ?iil' - ;~"~~"!!,,'''~'\-''-
. ';'
Bosse~de-Nage returned with eleven scenery vans filled with
vertical stacks of unredeemed canvases.
43
"Do you think, my friend," ended Faustroll, "that one could
possibly give gold to these people which would remain gold and
worthy of being gold in their wallets?
"That same in which they are now submerged will also spread
the well-adjusted streams of its flux over their canvas. It is young
and virgin, in every way comparable to the matter with which
babies beshit themselves."
And after aiming the beneficent lance of the painting machine
at the center of these quadrilaterals dishonored by irregular
colors, he appointed to the control of this mechanical monster
M. Henri Rousseau,44 artist painter decorator, called the
Customs-officer, mentioned with honor and medal-holder, who
for sixty-three days embellished most painstakingly the impotent
diversity of the grimaces from the National Department Store with
the uniform stillness of chaos.
86
BOOK SIX
A W H; U' 'f ((:])[. lUII: 1 [J UL1 [J
CON C ERN I N G THE T E R M E S 45
Now, Faustroll was sleeping next to Visited.
The great bed, carved out by knife, squatted upon the naked-
ness of the earth, that ancient part of the world' s nebula, and
poured upon the ground the worm-eaten hours of its sand.
Amid this rhythmical silence, Visited desired to discover
whether, underneath the spiral-painted tapestry, Faustroll, who had
loved her like the infinite series of numbers, possessed a heart
capable of pumping out with its open and closed fist the projection
of circling blood.
The watch' s tick-tock, like the scratching on a table of a fin
cgern~~ili.2L~_wiL' -b~: ~t.;~-;~ar. She cou;;;r~~
strokes; the pulsation stopped, then continued up to eleven ...
87
~~-
_.' \ "
,
' " -. '
The bishop' s daughter heard her own sleep before any further
beats, and these did not disturb her, for she did not survive the fre-
quency of Priapus.
On the oak of the decrepit bed, the tcrmes, comparable to the
invisibility of a red louse with yellow eyes, lent the isochronism of
the throbbing of its head to the simulation of Faustroll' s heart.
ern deluge of the universal Seine, the unforeseen beast Clinamen
ejaculated onto the walls of its universe:
TO PAUL FORT
NEBUCHADNEZZAR CHANGED INTO BEAST
W hat a beautiful sunset! or rather it is the moon, like a porthole
in a hogshead of wine greater than a ship, or like the oily stopper
of an Italian flask. The sky is a sulphurous gold so red that there
is really nothing missing but a bird five hundred meters high capa-
ble of wafting us a breeze from the clouds. The architecture, the
very type of all these flames, is most lively and even rather mov-
ing, but too romantic! There are towers with eyes and beaks and
turrets capped like little policemen. Two watching women sway at
the wind-swept windows like drying straitjackets. Thus the bird:
The great Angel, who is not angel but Principality, swoops
down, after a flight exactly as black as a martin' s, the color of
the metal of a roofer' s anvil. W ith one point on the roof, the
compasses close and open up again, describing a circle around
Nebuchadnezzar. One arm chants the metamorphosis. The king' s
hair does not stand on end, but droops like a walrus' s wet whiskers;
the pointed ends of his hair make no effort to squeeze shut the
sensitive pimples which people this limp seaweed with zoophytes
reflecting all the stars: tiny wings flutter to the rhythm of a toad' s
webbed feet. Pitiful pleas swim up against the stream of tears. The
eyes' sorrowful pupils, in their ascent, crawl toward the knees of
eLl NA MEN 46
... Meanwhile, after there was no one left in the world, the
Painting Machine, animated inside by a system of weightless
springs, revolved in azimuth in the iron hall of the Palace of
Machines, the only monument standing in a deserted and razed
Paris; like a spinning top, it dashed itself against the pillars, swayed
and veered in infinitely varied directions, and followed its own
whim in blowing onto the walls' canvas the succession of primary
colors ranged according to the tubes of its stomach, like a pousse-
l'amour in a bar, the lighter colors nearest to the surface. In the
sealed palace which alone ruffled this dead smoothness, this mod-
88 89
, . .
."1 ' ' ' '
' .: ..... "
the wine-lees colored sky. but the angel has enchained the newborn
monster in the blood of the vitreolls palace and thrown him into
the bottom of a bottle.
with me) mistuh Loyal?), 47 plod toward the Passion, shaking their
clowns' straw wigs encrusted with seasalt.
TOW ARD THE CROSS
At one end of the Infinite, in the form of a rectangle, is the white
cross where the demons have been executed together with the
unrepentant Thief. There is a barrier around the rectangle, white,
with five-pointed stars studding the bars. Down the rectangle's
diagonal comes the angel, praying calm and white like the wave's
foam. And the horned fish, a monkey trick of the divine Ichthys,
surge back toward the cross driven through the Dragon, who is
green except for the pink of his bifid tongue. A blood-covered
creature with hair standing on end and lenticular eyes is coiled
around the tree. A green Pierrot rushes up, weaving from side to
side and turning cartwheels. And all the devils, in the shape of
mandrills or clowns, spread their caudal fins out wide like acro-
bats' legs, and, imploring the inexorable angel (Woa1l'/ yew p'-Iay
GOD FORBIDS AOAM AND EVE TO TOUCH THE TREE OF
GOOD AND EVIL. THE ANGEL LUCIFER RUNS AW AY
God is young and gentle, wirh a rosy halo. His robe is blue and his
gestures sweeping. The tree's base is twisted and its leaves aslant.
The other trees are doing nothing apart from being green. Adam
adores and looks to see if Eve also adores. They ' ;;;~~"' d;eir knees.
The angel Lucifer, old and looking like tim.
c
and like the old man
of the sea lapidated by Sinbad, plunges with his gilded horns
toward the lateral ether.
THE RIVER AND THE MEADOW
The river has a fat, soft face for the smack of oars, a neck with
many wrinkles, a blue skin with green downy hair. Between its
~, press~' d;' ;;i~' ~Thold;cl;; iittle Island shaped like a
chrysalis. The Meadow in its green gown is asleep, its head in the
hollow of its shoulder and neck.
LOVE
The soul is wheedled by Love who looks exactly like an iridescent
veil and assumes the masked face of a chrysalis. It walks upon
inverted skulls. Behind the wall where it hides, claws brandish
weapons. It is baptized with poison. Ancient monsters, the wall's
substance, laugh into their green beards. The heart remains red
and blue, violet in the artificial absence of the iridescent veil that it
lS weavlllg.
THE CLOW N
His round hump hides the world's roundness, as his red cheek
rends the lions on the tapestry. Clubs and diamonds are em6roi-

90 91
. .
"
r - : , . '
de red on the crimson silk of his garments, and toward the sun and
the grass he makes a benedictory aspersion with his tinkling
aspergillum.
venom. All this blood is aflame and held within the rock whence
people are hurled. And there is a red angel for whom one single
gesture suffices, which signifies: FROM TOP TO BOTTOM.
FEAR CREATES SILENCE
Nothing is terrifying, if it be not a widowed gallows, a bridge with
dry piers, and a shadow which is content to 6e black. Fear, turning
away its head, keeps its eyelids lowered and the lips of the stone
mask closed.
FROM BETHLEHEM TO THE GARDEN OF OLIVES
It is a little red star, above the crib of the Mother and Child, and
above the ass's cross. The sky is blue. The little star becomes a
halo. God has lifted the weight of the cross from the animal and
...... _- _. - ---~-
.c: : a: ,: r r~i: : .e s,,-,i.;.t -,o",n"-,h",i"s-"b,,r a"n",d"-,n",e"w~l",n",a",n",,,,' s. sh0ul der . The 61ack cr0ss
- --
becomes rose, the blue sky turns violet. The road is as straight and
white as the arm of one crucified
Alas! the cross has become bright red. It is a blade steeped in
blood from the wound. Above the body, at the end of the road' s
--_. . _----- .... ---
~rm, are eyes and a beard which bleed also, and above his image in
the wooden _n,;ir;or:"Chris]:.~p~llsot: ts..!: ~.~-I.. ---------~-' ....,
"FARTHER! FARTHER!)) CRIES GOD TO THE MEEK
The mountain is red, the sun and the sky are red. A finger points
toward its peak. The rocks surge upward, the absolute summit lost
to view. The bodies ~f those who have"not reacl1edltcome-tum-
bling down again head first. One falls back;;;;;] on to his hands~
d: : p~is' gcir' ~;;;~;her waits with his back to the : ountai~
near his bottles. One lies down on the road, his eyes still climbing.
The finger still points, and the sun waits for obedience before it
will set.
IN THE NETHER REGIONS
The fire of the nether regions is of liquid blood, and one can see
down to the very depths. The heads of suffering have sunk down,
and an arm is raised from each body like a tree from the sea bed,
stretched to where the fire is abated. There, a serpent darts his
J UST A W ITCH
Her hump to the rear, belly to the fore, neck twisted, hair whistling
in the flight of the broomstick with which she has transfixed her-
self, she goes under the claws, vegetation of the bright red sky,
and the index of the road to the Devil.
EMERGING FROM HIS BLISS, GOD CREATES THE W ORLDS
God arises haloed by a blue pentagram, blesses and sows and
makes the sky bluer. Fire glows red from the idea of ascension,
92
93
,--"'-_ . . '
and the gold of the stars mirrors the halo. The suns are great four-
leaved clovers, in bloom, like the cross. And the only thing not
created is the white robe of Form itself.
BOOK SEVEN
THE DOCTORS AND THE LOVER
In the bed, calm as a green sea, there is a floating of outstretched
arms, or rather these are not the arms but the two divisions of the
head of hair, vegetating upon the dead man. And the cenrer of this
head of hair curves like a dome and undulates like the movement
of a leech. Faces, mushrooms bloated with rottenness, spring up
evenly and red in the windowpanes of agony. The first doctor, a
larger orb behind this dome, trapezoidal in character, becomes
slit-eyed and decks his cheeks with bunting. The second rejoices
in the external equilibrium of spectacles, twin spheres, and weighs
his diagnostic in the lib ration of dumbbells. The third old man
veils himself with the white wing of his hair and announces desper-
ately that beauty returns to the skull by polishing his own. The
fourth, without understanding, watches ... the lover who, against
the current of the stream of tears, sails in pursuit of the soul, his
eyebrows joined upward by their inner points in the shape of cranes
in flight, or the communion of the two palms of one praying or
swimming, in the attitude of daily devotion called by the Brahmins
KHURMOOKUM.
(The Sundhya, or the daily Prayers of the Brahmins).48
CONCERNING THE GREAT SHIP
MOUR-DE-ZENCLE49
The sieve, which would have burst into flames like a puerile resin
in the city quietly consumed by fire and death, reared up the head
of its prow under the pull of Faustroll' s tiller, and its gesture was
the opposite of the charitable crosier of Mendacious.
The meshed base, unsinkable because of its oily coating,
rested upon the waves' denticulation like a sturgeon upon several
harpoons, and beneath it was a keyboard of water and air alter-
nately. The disappearance pre~~dini the' ~a' pparition of the corpses
of the seven day' s murder squinted toward us from the other side
of the reticular bars protecting us.
94
95
---_ . . .
,I.. ' .~
. ~
The toad from rhe isle of Shades snapped up the sun for
its supper, and the water was night. That is to say, the banks dis-
appeared and the sky and the river became comparable and
undifferentiated, and the skiff became the pupil of a great eye, or
a stationary balloon, with a dizziness to left and to right whose
feathers I was ordered to stroke with my two oars.
Immobile barrels stemmed the current at express speed, rolled
into balls.
And to escape these things, as one seeks refuge under one's
bedclothes in the once-and-for-all blackness, Faustroll maneuvered
the skiff into an aqueduct six hundred meters wide along which the
canal barges were vomited into the river.
(Here end, the narrative of Panmuphle)
The great ship Mour-de-Zencle, which means Horse-muzzle-
bearing-scythe- shaped-patches, loomed up on the immediate
horizon like a black sun, having the appearance under the bright
arch at the tunnel's end of an eye without its leather blinker,
approaching the fixity of its own painted pupils, green in a yellow
iris. On the invisible towpath, like a ledge on the vault's brink,
clopped the front horseshoes of the file of four animals bearing the
sign of death, treading awkwardly with their hooves.
With his topaz-beringed forefinger, moistened in his mouth,
Faustroll scraped the paraffin from the bottom of the boat. The
96
artesian well (hell was in Artois that day) swirled hissing around
their feet, with a noise opposite to the deglutition of an emptying
bathtub. The sieve rocked in its last pulsation. The penultimate
and the last meshes where the water wove its barnacles and let
its double hymen be violated by anti-peristaltic tongues, were
named the mouths of Panmuphle and Faustroll. The copper shut-
tle glittering wirh irs setting of air bubbles, and the jaws exhaling
the breath from their bones, imitated coins falling in water or
the water spider's nest. Faustroll, procuring fresh canvas in the
name of God, steeped in the painting machine's lustral water a
different sky to that of Tyndall,' o then joined his palms in an atti-
tude of praying or swimming, in the manner of daily devotion
called Khurmookum by the Brahmins. The great ship Mour-de-
Zencle passed like a black iron over an ironing board; and the
echo of the sixteen horny fingers of the preterite horses whispered
KHURMOOKUM beneath the vault' s exit, fading away with the soul.
Thus did Doctor Faustroll make the gesture of dying, at the
age of sixty-three.
97
. 1 . . d -' --- . ,--
, ,.,,"
,-, . .,
""', ,-Ii. ,
CONCERNING THE LINE
The bishop redds the leiter from God
TO FELIX FEN iON
In the manuscript, of which Panmuphle, interrupted by the
monotonous prolixity of the baboon, could only decipher the pro-
legomena, Faustroll had noted a small fragment of the Beautiful
that he knew, and a small fragment of the True that he knew, dur-
ing the syzygy of words; and one could have reconstructed,
through this facet, all art and all science, which is to say All; but
can one tell if All is a regular crystal, rather than more probably
a monster ( Faustroll defined the universe as that which i, the
------- -...--
exception to one;elf)?
--n~s cogitat~the marine bishop as he swam over the ship-
wreck of the mechanical boat, over the sunken quintessential
works, over the carcass of Panmuphle and the body of Faustroll.
However, he remembered that, following the proposition of
the learned Professor Cayley,51 a single curve drawn in chalk on a
blackboard two and a half meters long can detail all the atmos-
pheres of a season, all the cases of an epidemic, all the haggling of
the hosiers of every town, the phrases and pitches of all the sounds
---
98
of all the instruments and of all the voices of a hundred singers and
two hundred musicians, together with the phases, according to the
position of each listener or participant, which the ear is unable to
selZe.
And behold, the wallpaper of Faustroll' s body was unrolled by
the saliva and teeth of the water.
Like a musical score, all art and aU science were written in the
curves of the limbs of the ulrrasexagenarian ephebe, and their
progression to an infinite degree was prophesied therein. For, just
as Professor Cayley recorded the past in the two dimensions of a
black surface, so the progress of the solid future entwined the body
in spirals. The Morgue harbored for twO days on its slab" the
book revealed by God concerning the glorious truth spread out
through the three (four or n for some people) directions of space.
Meanwhile, Faustroll, finding his soul to be abstract and
naked, donned the realm of the unknown dimension.
99
.-
BOOK EIGHT
lE'[' 1BIlEIRnH '[' y
TO LOUIS DUMUR
Leves gustus ad philosophiam movere fortasse ad atheinnum,
sed pleniores haustus ad religionem reducere.
53
- FRANCIS BACON
3"1
CONCERNING THE MEASURING ROD,
THE W ATCH AND THE TUNING FORK
Telepathic letter from Doctor F aus/rolf to Lord Kelvin
"My dear colleague,
"It is a long time since I have sent you news of myself; but I
do not think you will have imagined that I was dead. Death is only
for common people. It is a fact, nevertheless, that I am no longer
on earth. W here I am I have only discovered a very shorr time ago.
For we are both of the opinion that, if one can measure what one
is talking about and express it in numbers, which constitute the
1 00
sole reality, then one has some knowledge of one' s subject. Now,
up to the present moment I knew myself to be elsewhere than on
earth, in the same way that I know that quartz is situated else-
where, in the realm of hardness, and less honorably so, than the
ruby; the ruby elsewhere than the diamond; the diamond than the
posterior callosities of Bosse-de-Nage; and their thirty-two skin-
folds - more numerous than his teeth, if one includes the wisdom
teeth - than the prose of Latent Obscure.
"But was I elsewhere in terms of date or of position, before or
to the side, after or nearer? I was in that place where one finds
oneself after having left time and space: the infinite eternal, Sir.
"It was natural that, having lost my books, my skiff of metallic
cloth, the society of Bosse-de-Nage and Monsieur Rene-Isidore.
Panmuphle, bailiff, my senses, the earth, and those two old Kantian
aspects of thought, I should suffer the same anguish of isolation as
a residual molecule several centimeters distant from the others in
a good modern vacuum of Messrs. Tait and Dewar. And, even
then, perhaps the molecule knows that it is several centimeters
away! For one single centimeter, the only valid sign for me of
space, being measurable and a means of measuring, and for the
mean solar second, in terms of wnich the heart of my terrestrial
body beat - for these things I would have given my soul, Sir,
despite the usefulness to me of this commodity in informing you of
these curiosities.
"The body is a more necessary vehicle because It supports
1 01
-". ~,.
W 1~,,'l'fIll',!I! 1"",1<' ,. . ~'.I""~.'' -/"'''''''";:,,,
~,:;""'j'"i!' ,~'- "' 1 -,.,' , . ".
one' s clothes, and through clothes one' s pockets. I had left in one
of my pockets by mistake my centimeter, an authentic copy in
brass of the traditional standard, more portable than the earth or
even the terrestrial quadrant, which permits the wandering and
posthumous souls of interplanetary savants to concern themselves
no further with this old globe, nor even with e.G.S. ,5 4 as far as
measurements of size are concerned, thanks to MM. Mechain and
Delambre.
"As for my mean solar second, were I to have remained on the
earth I still could not have been certain of retaining it safely and
of being able to measure time validly through its medium.
"If in the course of a few million years I have not terminated
my pataphysical studies, it is certain that the period of the earth' s
rotation around its axis and of its revolution around the sun will
( ' ' ' ' ' 7both be very different from what they are now. A good watch,
--- which I would have had running all this time, would have cost me
a;;-erorb-ltant pric' e, and, in any case, I do not perform secular
.,.,..----: -_"_"' __ _." ~ ..u- . ~ .~. _ .~.~. _ . ~ ,,_
experiments, have nothing but contempt for continuity, and con-
_. -. . -. . . . - . . . . . . . . M. _' ,
sider it more esthetic to keep Til}1 e il~elf Ln!,llypocket, or the unity
.: ....: : .;.~~.~~---. . - -'"
of titEc, wh~fh~is.its_J n.~pshot.
"For these reasons, I possessed a vibrator better arranged for
permanence and for absolute accuracy than the hairspring of a
chronometer, one whose period of vibration would have retained
the same value over a certain number of million years with an error
of less than I: 1 ,000. A tuning fork. Its period had been carefully
1 02
determined, before I embarked in the skiff, according to your
instructions, by our colleague Professor Macleod, in terms of
mean solar seconds, with the prongs of the tuning fork being
pointed successively upward, downward and toward the horizon, in
order to eliminate the least effect of terrestrial gravity.
"I no longer had even my tuning fork. Imagine the perplexity
of a man outside time and space, who has lost his watch, and his
measuring rod, and his tuning fork. I believe, Sir, that it is indeed
this state which constitutes death.
"But I suddenly remembered your teachings and my own
previous experiments. Since I was simply NOW HERE, or SOME-
W HERE, which is the same thing, I found a substance with which
to make a piece of glass, having met various demons, including the
Sorting Demon of Maxwell,5 ,) who succeeded in grouping particu-
lar types of movement in one continuous widespread liquid ( what
you call small elastic solids or molecules): a substance as plentiful
as one could desire, in the shape of silicate of aluminum. I have
engraved the lines and lit the two candles, albeit with a little time
"and perseverance, having had to work without even the aid of flint
implements. I have seen the two rows of spectrums, and the yellow
spectrum has returned my centimeter to me by virtue of the fIgure
5 .892 x 1 0.
5
>6
"Now that we are happy and comfortable, and on dry land
as is my atavistic habit, since I carryon me the one thousand
millionth part of a quarter of the earth' s circumference,,)7 which is
1 03
more honorable than being attached to the surface of the globe by
attraction, permit me, I pray, to note a few impressions for you.
"Eternity appears to me in the image of an immobile ether,
which consequently is not luminiferous. I would describe luminif-
erous ether as circularly mobile and perishable. And I deduce from
Aristotle (Treatise on the Heavens) that it is appropriate to write
ETHERNITY.
"Luminiferous ether together with all material particles, which
I can easily distinguish - my astral body having good pataphysical
eyes - possesses the form, at first sight, of a system of rigid
links joined together, and having rapidly rotating flywheels piv-
oted on some of the links. Thus it fulfils exactly the mathematical
ideal worked out by Navier, Poisson, and Cauchy. Furthermore,
it constitutes an elastic solid capable of determining the magnetic
rotation of the plane of polarization of light discovered by Faraday.
At my posthumous leisure I shall arrange it to have zero moment
of momentum as a whole and to reduce it to the state of a mere
spring balance.
"Moreover, I am of the opinion that one could reduce consid-
erably the complexity of this spring balance or this luminiferous
ether by substituting for the linked gyros tats various systems of
circulation of liquids of infinite volume through perforations in
infinitely small solids.
"It will lose none of its qualities as a result of these modifica-
tions. Ether has always appeared to me, to the rouch, to be as
1 04
elastic as jelly and yielding under pressure like Scottish shoe-
makers' wax."
CONCERNING THE SUN AS A COOL SOLID
Second letter to Lord Kdyin
"The sun is a cool, solid, and homogeneous globe. Its surface is
divided into squares of one meter, which are the bases of long,
inverted pyramids, thread-cut, 696,999 kilometers long, their
points one kilometer from the center. Each is mounted on a screw
and its movement toward the center would cause, if I had the time,
the rotation of a paddle at the top end of each screw shaft, in a
few meters of viscous fluid, with which the whole surface is thinly
covered ...
"I was quite disinterested in this mechanical spectacle, not hav-
ing found again my mean solar second and being distraught at the
loss of my tuning fork. But I took a piece of brass and fashioned a
wheel in which I cut two thousand teeth, copying everything which
Monsieur Fizeau, Lord Rayleigh, and Mrs. Sidgwick had achieved
in similar circumstances.
II Suddenly, the second was rediscovered in the absolute
1 05
.,.r" ,," ".... ... . ..~.~ -
,,. '
measure of 9,41 3 kilometers per mean solar second of the Siemens
unit, ' 5 8 and the pyramids, forced to descend on their threads since
they found themselves, like myself, in the movement of time, were
obliged to come into equilibrium, in order to remain stable, by bor-
rowing a sufficient quantity of Sir Humphry Davy' s repulsive
motion; and the fixed matter, the screw shafts and the screw nuts
disappeared. The sun became viscous and began to turn on its axis
in twenty-fIve-day cycles; in a few years you will see sunspots on it,
and a few quarter-centuries will determine their periods. Soon, in
its great age, it will shrink in a diminution of three-quarters.
"And now I am being initiated into the science of all things
( you will receive three new fragments from two of my forthcoming
books), having reconquered all perception, which consists in dura-
tion and size. I understand that the weight of my brass wheel,
which I clasp between the hebetude of the abstract fingers of my
astral body, is the fourth power of eight meters per hour; I hope,
deprived of my senses, to recognize color, temperature, taste, and
various qualities other than the six,59 in the actual number of revo-
lutions per second ...
"Farewell: I can glimpse already, perpendicularly to the sun,
the cross with a blue center, the red brushes toward the nadir and
the zenith, and the horizontal gold of foxes' tails. ,,60
1 06
ACCORDING TO IBICRATES THE GEOMETER
(Liule sketches on Pataphysics after lbicrates the Geometer and his divine teacher
.. --------. .. '---,"-'-
Sophrolatos the Armenian, translated and brougM to light by Doctor F austroll.)
F ragment of the Dialogue upon the Erotic
MATHETES
Tell me, 0 Ibicrates, thou whom we have named the Geometer
because thou knowest all things by the means of lines drawn in
different directions, and hast given us the veritable portrait of three
persons of God in three escutcheons which are the quart essence
of Tarot symbols, the second being barred with bastardy and the
fourth revealing the distinction and evil engraved in the wood of the
tree of knowledge, I hope most ardently, if it pleaseth thee, to
know thy thoughts upon love, thou who hast deciphered the imper-
ishable because unknown fragments, inscribed in red on sulphurous
papyrus, of the Pataphysics of Sophrotatos the Armenian. Answer,
I pray thee: ---for I shaH question thee, and~t me.
rBICRATES
That at least is exactly true, 0 Mathetes. Then speak, therefore.
1 07
. ~---
' .- ~. . . ;.
"'~. ,
"~.
MATHETES
Before all else, having noticed how all the philosophers have incar-
nated love in beings and have expressed it in different symbols
of contingency, instruct me, 0Ibicrates, in the eternal significance
of these.
IBICRATES
The Greek poets, 0 Mathetes, corbeled the forehead of Eros with
a horizontal bandelet, which is the bend or fess of the blazon, and
the sign Minus of those who study mathematics. And Eros being
the son of Aphrodite, his hereditary arms were ostentative of
woman. And contradictorily Egypt erected its steles and obelisks
perpendicularly to the cruciferous horizon, thus creating the sign
Plus, which is male. The juxtaposition of the two signs of the
binary and the ternary gives the shape of the letter H, which is
Chronos, father of Time or Life, and thus embraces mankind. For
the Geometer, these two signs cancel each other out or impreg-
nate each other, and there results simply their progeny, which
becomes egg or zero, all the more identical because they are con-
trary. And in the matter of the dispute between the sign Plus and
the sign Minus, the Reverend Father Ubu, of the Society of J esus,
ex-king of Poland, has written a great tome entitled Caesar-
Antichrist,61 in which is to be found the sole practical demonstration
of the identity of opposites, by means of the mechanical device
called phy,ick-,tick.
108
MATHETES
Is this possible, 0Ibicrates?
lBICRATES
Absolutely indeed, veritably. And the third abstract sign of the
tarots, according to Sophrotatos the Armenian, is what we call the
Club, which is the Holy Ghost in his four directions, the two
wings, the tail, and the head of the bird; or, reversed, Lucifer erect
horned with his belly and his twO wings, like the medicinal cuttle-
fish; more particularly, at least, when one eliminates from the latter
object all negative - that is to say, horizontal - lines; or, thirdly,
it represents the Tau or the cross, emblem of the religion of char-
ity and love; or, finally, the phallus which is dactylic ally triple, in
truth, 0Mathetes
MATHETES
Then to some extent in our temples today, love may still be con-
sidered to be God, although, I agree, in somewhat abstruse forms,
o Ibicrates?
IBICRATES
The tetragon of Sophrotatos, contemplating itself, inscribes within
itself another tetragon half as great as itself, and evil is the sym-
metrical and necessary reflection of good, these being the unity of
two ideas, or the idea of the number two; good, in consequence,
109
. ' . ,~:--. -. -. -
!+ ,:
to a certain degree, indeed, I believe, or indifferent at the very
least, 0 Mathetes. The tetragon, being hermaphroditic, engenders
God by interior intuition, while Evil, likewise hermaphroditic,
engenders parturition, . ,
PANTAPHYSICS
62
AND CATACHEMY
II
Further fragment
God transcendent is trigonal and the soul transcendent theogonal,
consequently trigonal also.
God immanent is trihedral and the soul immanent equally
trihedral.
There are three souls (cf Plato).
Man is tetrahedral because his souls are not independent,
Therefore he is a solid, and God is spirit.
If souls are independent, man is God (MORAL SClENCE).
~en thetTiree thirds of the number three. --
MAN: The three persons are the three souls of God.
DEUS: Tres animae sunt tres personae hominis.
TOGETHER: Homo est Deus.
110
CONCERNING THE SURFACE OF GOD
God is, by definition, without dimension; it is permissible, how-
ever, for the clarity of our exposition, and though he possesses no
dimensions, to endow him with any number of them greater than
zero, if these dimensions vanish on both sides of our identities. We
shall content ourselves with two dimensions, so that these flat geo-
metrical signs may easily be written down on a sheet of paper.
Symbolically God is signified by a triangle, but the three
Persons should not be regarded as being either its angles or its
sides. They are the three apexes of another equilateral triangle cir-
cumscribed around the traditional one. This hypothesis conforms
to the revelations of Anna Katherina Emmerick, who saw the cross r __
(which we may consider to be the symbol of the V rb of G~ in the
form of a Y, a ac w lC s e explains only by the physical reason
that no arm of human length could be outstretched far enough to
reach the nails of the branches of a Tau.
Therefore, POSTULATE:
Until we are furnished with more ample information and for
greater ease in our provisional estimates, let us suppose God to
have the shape and symbolic appearance of three equal straight
lines of length a, emanating from the same point and having
between them angles of 120 degrees. From the space enclosed
III
between these lines, or [rom the triangle obtained by joining the
three farthest points of these straight lines, we propose to calcu4
late the surface.
Let x be the median extension of one of the Persons a, 2y the
side of the triangle to which it is perpendicular, Nand P the exten-
sions of the straight line (a +x) in both directions ad infinitum.
Thus we have:
x =00- N - d - P.
But
N~oo-O
and
p =o.
Therefore
x = 00- (00_ 0) - a - 0 = 00- 00+ 0- a - 0
x = - a.
In another respect, the right triangle whose sides are a, x, and
y gIVe us
112
By substituting for x its value of (-a) one arrives at
a' = (_a)' + / = a'+ /.
Whence
and
Therefore the surface of the equilateral triangle having for
bisectors of its angles the three straight lines a will be
s =y (x+a) =>10(-a +a)
S =0>10.
COROLLARY: At first consideration of the radical ~O, we can
affirm that the surface calculated is one line at the most; in the second
place, if we construct the figure according to the values obtained
for x and y, we can determine:
That the straight line 2y, which we now know to be 2 >10, has
its point or intersection on one of the straight lines a in the oppo-
site direction to that of our first hypothesis, since x =- a; also,
that the base of our triangle coincides with its apex;
That the two straight lines a make, together with the first one,
113
angles at least smaller than 60, and what is more can only attain
2-Y0 by coinciding with the first straight line a.
Which conforms to the dogma of the equivalence of the three
Persons between themselves and in their totality.
We can say that a is a straight line connecting 0 and 00, and
can define God thus:
DEFINITION: God is the shortest distance between zero and
infinity.
.. I~~hich direction? one may ask.
We shall reply that His first name is not Jack, but Plus-and-
Minus. And one should say:
God is the shortest distance between 0 and 00, in either direction.
Which conforms to the belief in the two principles; but it is
more correct to attribute the sign + to that of the subject's faith.
But God being without dimension is not a line.
- Let us note, in fact, that, according to the formula
oo-O-a+a+O=oo
-----.---- ..--.~-----.
the length a is nil, so that a is not a line but a point.
Therefore, definitively:
GOD IS THE TANGENTIAL POINT BETWEEN ZERO AND
INFINITY '.!:~<}E.b~!ss.~ the SC!:_~.ce.
114
N1rIE
BY SIMON WATSON TAYLOR
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
The translator wishes to express his great indebtedness to the College de
'Pataphysique, and in particular to M. Latis and to Jean Ferry, without whose
advice and criticism this English version could not have been undertaken - nor
even envisaged, Thanks are also due to Roger Shattuck, Stanley Chapman and
Stefan Themerson for valuable suggestions and criticisms.
TITLE AND CONTENTS
As Roger Shattuck points OUt in the section he devotes to "Alfred Jarry: Poet
and 'Pataphysician" in his The Banquet Years (see Bibliography), the name of
the hero, Fausrroll, may be taken to be a combination of the words Faust and
Troll (a goblin or imp), In 1896 Jarry appeared as one of the trolls in Lugne-
Poe's production of Peer Gynt (the Scandinavian fallst!) at the Theatre de
I'CEuvre, Jarry's intention was perhaps to imply thar his (autobiographical) hero
was "the imp of science."
The subtitle, "a Ileo-scientific novel," is printed only in the first edition
( 1911).
The epigraph from the Upanishads is omitted from later editions, as is the
table of contents. The 1955 edition of Fau.stroll even goes so far as to omit the
115
marginal bailiff's seals from the heads of chapters 1,3,5; and the word "pata-
physician" from the title!
This translation is from the first edition (which contains the fewest typo
graphical errors, misreadings, and omissions) collated where necessary with the
original MSS.
BOOK ONE
CHAPTER 2
1. "A few sea-green mustachios" Sic. Jarry wrote in both MSS of Fauslroll "unes
moustaches vert de mer."
2, In English in the original.
3. The "Ordre de la Grande Gidouille" was promulgated by Jarry in his
Almanach du Pere Ubu (1899), and has been revived by the College de
'Pataphysique, The word "gidouille" appears frequently throughout the cycle of
Ubu plays in general reference to Father Ubu's regally protruding stomach.
"Strumpot" is an inspired verbal invention by Cyril Connolly.
CHAPTER 4
Doctor Faustroll's equivalent authors:
LEON BLOY: see notes, Ch. 15.
COLERIDGE: Jarry's translation of the Rime of the Ancienl Mariller was first
published in 1921.
GEORGES DARIEN: The Thief, an astonishing and hitherto rare book, published
in 1898, has been republished by Jean-Jacques Pauvert (Paris, 1955),
MARCELINE DESBORDES-VALMORE: French writer and poet (1785.1859),
MAX ELSKAMP: Belgian poet (1862-1931).
CHRISTIAN DIETRICH GRABBE: German poet (1801-1836). Jarry made a frel'
translation of this play under the title of Les Silenes. It has been translated im"
116
English by Barbara Wright: Comedy, S,ltire, Irony and Deeper Meaning
(Gaberbocchus, London, 1955).
GUSTAVE KAHN: see notes, Ch. 18.
MALLARME: see notes, Ch. 19.
CATULLE MENDES: French writer (1841-1909).
)OSEPHIN (SAR) PELADAN: French writer (1858-1918), founder of the Salon
de la Rose-Croix.
JEAN DE CHILRA: a pen name (and anagram) of Rachilde, for whom see notes,
eh. 24, and note to Book Three.
REGNIER: see notes, Ch. 20.
MARCEL SCHWOB: see notes, Ch, 21.
PIERRE BONNARD: see notes, Chs, 23 and 32. For the Reyue Blanche, see note
to Book Two.
AUBREY BEARDSLEY: see notes, Ch. 13.
4. "Delmor de Pionsec" is a near-anagram of "Demolder espion," and
"Pionsec" also means "stale pedant"; for the real Demolder, see note on Claude
Terrasse, Ch, 23. "Troccon" can be taken as a play on the name Trochon;
"troc can" means a "damn stupid bargain." Trochon was a bicycle dealer who
tried persistently but unsuccessfully unti! Jarry's death to collect from him the
balance due on the bicycle J arry had bought.
5. "Lourdeau" means blockhead.
6. "Panmuphle" is the equivalent of universal snout.
7. "Liconet" can be read "lui can est."
CHAPTER 6
c. V. BOYS: English physicist (1855-1944), inventor of the radio-micrometer,
etc., author of several popular scientific texts, including Soap Bubbles and
The Forces Which Mould Them (London, 1890; see illustration on tide page),
117
translated into French in 1892, and now reprinted (Doubleday, New York,
1959; Heinemann, London, 1960). The general sense of this chapter is largely
derived from these short essays (although the application, Ineed hardly say, is
entirely pataphysical).
8. This paragraph is a pnraphrase from Sir William Crooke's presidentinl
address to the Society for Psychical Research, London, 1897. See notes, Ch. 9.
9. In French, "skiff" is "as" - a single-sculler; "as" also means an ace in cards,
and a "one" in dominoes. . A dry joke of Jarry's.
CHAPTER 7
ELSKAMP: Jarry had originally made the eighth seized book SaIl/lations d01l1
d'Angeliques. Though he changed this to Enluminures in his MS, he retained the
quotation from the first volume, from the poem "Consolatrice des affiiges."
FLORIAN: quotation from his play Les Deux Billets.
GRABBE: "the knight of the papal order of Civil Merit" is the Devil, in Grabbe's
play, Act II, scene 1. In Les Si[enes (see note, Ch. 4, Grabbe), Jarry turned the
Freiherr von Mordax into "Baron Tuai."
The Thousand and One Nights: LXIInd night.
Ubu Roi: i.e., "merdRe," the celebrated word invented by Jarry which provoked
the disorders that continued throughout the first performance of the play at the
Theatre de I'CEuvre in 1896,
VERNE: the expedition in fact reached 35 leagues beneath the earth's surface.
Faustroll must have grown weary at the 2 liz league stage. See Jean Ferry's arti
cle in Les Cahiers du College de 'Pataphysique, 22-23, Paris, May 1956,
118
BOOK TWO
THAOEE NATANSON: a collaborator on the Revue Blanche, which was directed
by his brother Alexandre, to which Jarry began to contribute in 1896. The ReYlle
Blanche published his Messaline and Le Sumllile, but refused Faustroll, whichJarry
offered to them after it had been turned down by the Mercure de FrarJce.
CHAPTER 8
10. A simple pun in French, e.g" "patte a physique."
CHAPTER 9
SIR WILLIAM CROOKES, F.R,S, his presidential address to the Society for
Psychical Research in London on January 29, 1897, is largely responsible for
the theme and some of the phraseology of this chapter. The address was trans-
lated into French and printed in the Revue Scientifique, Paris, May, 1897.
CHAPTER 10
CHRISTIAN BECK: Belgian writer (1879-1916), friend of Jarry and fellow con-
tributor to the review Mercure. Wrote also under the pen name of Joseph Bossi
a novel Les Erreurs and later another novel Le Papillon (in French, "baboon" is
"papion").
BOSSE-DE-NAGE: Hnage" or "nache" means "buttocks" in old FrellCh, thus
Bosse-de-Nage can mean "bottom-face," as Jarry suggests. For an erudite dis-
cussion of the possible origins of the name, see Noel Arnaud in the Cahiers du
College de 'Palaphysiqlle, no. 2223,
11, Quotation from Sue, L Salamandre, eh. XIV. "Le pichon joueic de is dia-
bles" is Proveno;al dialect for "Ie petit jeu des diables," the name of a strange
traditional procession in which the patticipants were dressed as devils and satyrs.
119
12. PLATO: the translation is as follows:
- Thou speakest truth, he replies.
- It is true.
- It is very true.
- It is clear, he replies, even to a blind man.
- It is obvious,
- It is an obvious fact.
- That is so,
- It seems.
- That is also my opinion.
- It does in fact appear to be so.
- That is so, he replies.
- I am also of that persuasion.
- Absolutely, he replies.
- Thou speakest wisely.
-w&
- Certainly, indeed.
- Irecall.
- Yes.
- It is thus,
- I think so, and most strongly.
- I agree.
- Very right.
- That is doubtless right, he replies.
- That is true, he replies.
- That is indeed necessary.
- By all means,
- By all means indeed.
- By all manner of means.
120
- We admit it,
- It is absolutely necessary.
- Very much.
- Very much indeed, in fact.
- That is logical, indeed.
- How could that be so?
- How could that be otherwise?
- How could it be otherwise?
- What then?
- What?
- Thou speakest truth.
- How true thac seems.
BOOK THREE
ALFRED VALLETTE: French writer, married to Rachilde (see notes, Ch. 24) and
larry's greatest and most faithful friend. At the time of writing Faustroll, Jarry
shared a house at Corbeil, the "Phalanstere," with Vallette, Rachilde, Herold
(see notes, eh, 26) and twO other friends, In 1890, Vallette, with a group of
writers belonging to the "symbolist" movement, founded a fortnightly review,
the Mercure de Frallce. Jarry contributed regular!y to the Mercure and extracts
from Fallstroll were originally published in the review (chapters 6 and 10to 25).
CHAPTER 12
LOUIS L. .: Louis Lormel, pen name of Louis Libaude (1869-1922), Founded
in 1892 L'Art Litteraire which published larry's first texts. They quarrelled, and
Lormel published in 1897 a story called Entre Soi in which larry and his friend
Leon-Paul Fargue appear as "Ia Tete de Mort" and "l'Androgyne" - not to
121
their advantage. This is Jarry's riposte, attacking Lormel nnd his colbborators.
ultra-symbolists and Catholics.
13. The author has "mer d'Habundes," phonetically "merde abunde" derived
from Rabe1ais (I, 9): "a cui foyard toujours abunde merde" ("squiny ass never
lacks for shit").
14. The author has "TIe de Bran," phonetically "Hildebrand," But the identity
of Baron Hildebrand remains obscure.
15. Derived from Rabe1ais (IV, 22); a lighthouse in the form of an obelisk.
16. The author has "halbran" which is phonetically equivalent to "halebran" -
"heave-cack. "
CHAPTER 13
AUBREY BEARDSLEY: a friend ofJarry who made a portrait of him (see Ch. 4)
which has apparently not survived. This chapter is full of allusions to different
drawings by Beardsley.
CHAPTER 14
EMILE BERNARD: the French painter who invented the "symbolist" technique
in painting and influenced Gauguin, Le Bois d'Amour is a locality ofPont-Aven
in Brittany, an artists' colony at that time, frequented by Bernard, Gauguin,
Jarry, among others. Bernard collaborated with Jarry on the latter's luxuriously
illustrated L'Ymagier and Perhinderion. "Le Bois d'Amour" is also the tide of a
painting by Bernard.
17. Frans:ois-Marie Arouer who took the pen name Voltaire; Ernest Renan,
French historian, author of La Vie de Jesus, etc.; Victor Charbonnel, French
writer and journalist, originally a priest, who quit Holy Orders in 1897 and gave
a series of anticlerical lectures. He founded La Raison in 1901.
122
CHAPTER 15
LEON BLOY: one of the six writers included in the twenty-seven "equivalent"
books of Doctor Faustroll to whom a subsequent chapter is also dedicated; the
author of, among many other works, Le Desespire, in which he appears as the
hero Marchenoir (Blackstep), a name which inspires the title of this chapter.
18, In the French, "monumental aute! de messe, noir." Jarry originally wrote in
his MS "autel de messe nair," but changed it, no doubt out of deference for
Bloy's susceptibilities.
CHAPTER 16
FRANC-NOHAIN: French poet, founded the review Canard Sauvage in 1903, to
which Jarry was a regular contributor. One ofFranc-Nohain's collections of
verse was entitled Flates, poemes amorphes (1898). He appears as the last of the
six kings in this chapter; the reference in the last paragraph is to a poem, Ronde
des Ne'Yeux lllattentiones, from Flutes, whose refrain was:
SOUS LES QUINCONCES
NOUS NE RETROUVONS PAS NOS ONCLES.
As regards the other five kings in this chapter, the third king may be identified
as Jules Renard, author of Histoires Naturelles. The others remain obscure.
CHAPTER 17
PAUL GAUGUIN: Jarry and Gauguin were together at Pont-Aven in 1894(see
note, eh. 14) and probably knew each other previously, since both were con-
tributors to the review Essais d'Art Libre (1892-94), edited first by Remy de
Gourmollt, subsequendy by Leon-Paul Fargue and Jarry.
The unfortunate Pierre Loti makes his first (anonymous) appearance tn
Faustroll at the end of this chapter, as the legless cripple ("cui de jane"). The
123
Omnibus de Corinthe on which he fails to get a footing was a short-lived quarterly
satirical review, edited by Marc Mouclier, describing itself as an "illustrated
vehicle of general ideas," the title of which was doubtless derived from the Latin
proverb Non licet omnibus adire Corinthum. For more about Loti, see Ch. 30and
notes thereto.
CHAPTER 18
GUSTAVE KAHN: French poet and literary critic, one ofJarry's earliest admir-
ers. The title of this chapter is derived from Kahn's first book of poems, Les
Palais Nomades, in which occurs the line: "Finir loin des POrtS en jon que bizarre."
This island represents the coast at Knocke in Belgium, where Kahn used
to spend holidays; Jarry was his guest there in 1895, Kahn is one of the six writ-
ers included in Doctor FaustrolJ's library to whom a chapter is subsequently
dedicated.
CHAPTER 19
MALLARME: another of the six among the twenty-seven "equivalents" to whom
a chapter is also dedicated. The title of this chapter is inspired by Mallarme's
sonnet based on the ending -yx. In a letter, addressed to Lefebvre and Casal is,
Mallarme writes: ", ,I only have three rhymes in ix, do your best to send me
the real meaning of the word ptyx: I am assured that it does not exist in any lan-
guage, which I would far prefer so that I may have the pleasure of creating it
through the magic of rhyme." To answer Mallarme's query: the word is, in this
nominative singular form, unknown in ancient Greek, but is found often in its
conjugation, ptykos, ptyki, etc. In the nominative, the alternative plykh was used
(from which we derive "triptych"), the sense being a fold or thickness,
Jarry's footnote refers to Mallarme's death in 1898, He attended the lat
ter's funeral, and wrote a homage Le Grdnd Pan est Mort! in the Almdnach du
Pere Ubu IIlustre Oanuary, 1899).
124
CHAPTER 20
HENRI DE REGNIER: another of the six writers to whom a chapter is also
dedicated. La Cmllle de Jaspe (1897), the twenty-first of Doctor Faustroll's
"equivalent" books, consists of three col1ections of stories, all of which contain
a number of characters whose names begin with Her (Hermes, Hermotine,
Hermagore, Hermocrate, Hermogelle).
19, In the French, "pavonne," a word coined by Regnier in the above text, mean-
ing "spread like a peacock."
20. InJarry's Almanach du Pere Ubu, Regnier is described as "celui qui cydope"
because or the monocle he wore,
21. "cut. according to the erstwhile hierarchy of the synllX,'" I.e. as an
heraldic shield is parted per bend sinister, the word "caille" ("cut") having that
meaning in heraldic terminology; and, in addition, a syrinx is a pipe made of
reeds (Panpipes) cut in this manner, There is also, no doubt, a reference here
to LA Syrinx, one of the many small literary and poetry reviews of the epoch.
22. In the French, "poncire"; from Proven<;al pomsire (pomme de Syrie), a kind
of lemon, not strictly a citron perhaps.
CHAPTER 21
MARCEL SCHWOB: friend of Jarry, who dedicated Ubu Roi to him, Among his
works, Les Vies Imaginaires included sections devoted to Cyril Tourneur and
Captain Kidd, Schwob is also one of the six writers in Doctor Faustroll's library
to whom a chapter is subsequently dedicated.
23, "the skull and kid": Jarry writes "Ia tete de mort et Ie chevreau" instead of
"Ia tete de mort et les tibias" ("skull and crossbones") for a pun on the name of
this chapter's hero.
125
CHAPTER 22
LAURENT TAILHADE: French poet (1854-1919). Author of AI( Pays du Mufle,
ba!lads ("mufle" means "snout," "muzzle," or, as a term of opprobrium, "cad,"
"lout"). On the evening of the anarchist Vaillant's terrorist attack in the
Chamber of Deputies (1893) Tailhade said: "Qu'importenr les victimes, si Ie
geste est beau! Qu'importe 1amort de vagues humanites, si par eHe s'affirme
l'individu!" Shortly afterward he was himself severely wounded when an anar-
chist bomb exploded in the restaurant Foyot (1894). He was a collaboraror of
the anarchist journal Ie Libertaire.
Chapter title: in French, "la grande eglise de Muflefiguiere." This is
derived by suggestion from Rabelais' word "papefiguiere" (IV, 45).
CHAPTER 23
CLAUDE TERRA SSE: composer, friend of Jarry, wrote music for Ubu Roi
(Ou'Verture d'Ubu Roi, Marche des Polonais, La Chanson du Decervelage) and com-
posed the music for Pantagruel, the "opera bouffe" which J arry wrote in
collaboration with Eugene Demolder. Jarry lived at the home of T errasse dur-
ing 1904-05, the name of the house being L'Ile Sonnante,
The line of music: from Mozart's Motet Burlesque, which was played in 1897
at the Theatre des Pantins in Paris, a theater launched by Jarry and T errasse
together with the painters Pierre Bonnard, Vuillard, and Serusier, the poet
Franc-Nohain, and a group of actors.
The musical instruments: ra'Vanastron, an ancient violin of India; sambuca,
an ancient stringed instrument of dubious identity, the Bible's sackbut; bandore,
a lute-like instrument of the Middle Ages; kin, a seven-stringed Chinese lute;
(che, a Chinese flute with mouthpiece in center and three holes on each side;
beggar's guitar, generally accepted translation for "turlurette" (era Charles VI),
perhaps incorrect: Wright prefers "a kind of bagpipe in the Middle Ages"; vina,
the primary and most ancient instrument of India - a seven-stringed lute;
126
magrepha, a small Hebrew organ; hydraullls, an ancient form of organ; sarruso-
phone, a mid 19th-century brass instrument invented for military bands;
zampogna, an Italian peasant bagpipe; chere, a large Bengali trumpet; coelophone,
a late 19thcentury hybrid "organ."
BOOK FOUR
CHAPTER 24
In explanation of the chapter tide: Rachilde wrote in 1896, under the pen name
Jean de Chilra, a novel La PrinceHe des Tenebres. She had also \vritten a novel
Madame fa Mort (1898) and a collection of stories Imitation de la Mort (1903).
She liked Rachilde to be taken as a man's name: hence "the king." The "her-
metic shades" invoke Mercury, of course, i.e. the Mercure de France (see note to
Book Three) whose offices were in the rue de l'Echaude (celebrated by Jarry in
the Chanron du Decervelage).
The "river Ocean" may be considered to be the Boulevard St. Germain,
The Mercure is again evoked by the monthly orgies of the transpontine lords:
i,e, the Tuesday salons held by Rachilde on its premises. Among the visitors,
Christian Beck (see notes, Ch. 10) can be distinguished by his Belgian hat. The
image of the toad was inspired by an indignant article in the review La Plume
(1897) comparing Rachi[de to "a little toad trying to fly." The identity of "the
devil P[ura[" remains inscrutably obscure; but perhaps he represents simply the
"vu[gar mob of detractors" of the Mercure,
In 1928, Rachitde wrote a book about Jarry, Alfred Jarry au le Surmale des
uttres, (one of Jarry's novels is entitled Le Surmafe).
CHAPTER 25
PAUL VALERY: friend of Jarry and contributor, at one time, to the same
reviews. In this and the following chapters of Faustroll, the persons to whom
127
the chapters are dedicated are no longer "described" in the text,
The marine bishop Mendacious (Mensonger): in Book XIII of the 16th-
century naturalist Ulissi Aldrovandi's De animalibtH infeclis, de serpentibllS el
draconlibus, de monstris, the phenomenon is illustrated with a commentary indi-
cating that "this creature was captured on the coast of Poland in 1531; offered
to the king, it became restless and was thrown back into the sea. It was as tall
as a man; it seemed to bear a miter on its head and to be clad in an episcopal
robe." This print was first reproduced in 1895 in the fifth number of L 'Ymagier,
an illustrated review edited by Jarry and Remy de Gourmonr.
24. Jarry has "une fJgue d'oreille." A literal rendering of the German
"Ohrfeige," "a box on the ears."
CHAPTER 26
PIERRE QUILLARD: founded the review La Pleiade; a writer, translator, and
eventually expert in political science and ethnology. A fishing (and drinking)
companion of Jarry at Corbeil. The March, 1897 issue of the Mercure contains
a Ballade a fa louange de quelques-uns with the following quatrain:
Quillard plaint (eUes que Ie fer
Du sombre Abd-ul-Hal}lid a fait veuves;
larry dit Merdre d'un ton fier
Et Vallette {it des eprcuye;
A, -FERDINAND HEROLD (to whom the "Fable" is dedicated): a poet and
dramatist, but more particularly a translator (Greek, Latin, Sanskrit,
German ... ). The quotation from the A'ranyaka Upanishad at the beginning of
Faustroll is, in the original French edition, from Herold's translation. Herold
was a cycling (and drinking) companion of Jarry's, and an unusual telegram from
128
Herold to J arry at Corbeil during 1898 has survived:
I HAVE JUST DRUNK AN EXCELLENT MARC BRANDY - HEROLD
25. The author has "Ie renard fraichement ecorche d'un ivrogne": "ecorcher un
renard" means "to vomit." See Rabc!ais, I, 11.
26. This line is in English in the original.
CHAPTER 27
27. "the bruchus, the attacus, the ophiomachus and the locust": Septuagint,
Lev. XI, 22. Authorized Version: "locust, bald locust, beetle and grasshopper";
Moffatt: "migratory locust, bald locust, chopping locust, grasshopper."
28. An imaginary word that can be read phonetically "c'est sous la taille" ("it's
below the waist").
CHAPTER 28
MONSIEUR DEIBLER: Anatole Deibler is, one may notice, the only one among
those to whom chapters of Faustroll are dedicated to benefit by an added adjec-
tive, in this case ';sympathetically." Deibler was France's Public Executioner of
the epoch. The nephew of Deibler's wife, Andre Obrecht, was one of France's
last Public Executioners.
29. Le Moyen de Parvenir 1 Oeuvre contenant la raison de tout ce qui a esti, est, &
sera I. etc. (How to Succeed .. j attributed to Frans:ois Beroalde (ca. 1556-
ca. 1629). Originally published about 1610, without date, place, or name of
author, the name of Beroalde only appears in 18th-century editions, and his
authorship is problematical. This astonishing book is presented in the form of a
banquet attended by historical personages of different eras discoursing on every
possible theme, with satirical anecdotes, erotic stories, puns, parodies, erudite
129
quotations, obscure allegories and indiscriminate aWlcks upon both the Catholic
and Protestant churches, womankind, the aristocracy, and all manner of tempo-
ral and spiritual pretensions. Beroalde was a convert to Catholicism, and became
Canon at Tours. According to Colletet "he frequented gambling dens and tav-
erns, devoted the revenue of his canonry to debauchery, and finally, being
without religious conviction, returned to Protestantism,"
30. A horse's head.
CHAPTER 29
31. Translation of the verse from Pi ron by Stanley Chapman.
32. "Iroll kiosques ... ," i.e. "pissotiere," phonetically "pisse au tiers."
3 3. "A special sail placed beneath rhe jibs." Bonnefoux (Dicli01Jnaire de marine a
'Voiles et a 'Vapeur, 1855) describes this little known sail as a "petite voile de fan-
taisie et d'un usage peu utile"! It was known in England as a "Jimmy Green."
BOOK FIVE
CHAPTER 30
In this chapter Jarry makes use (a posteriori, so to speak) of Loti's Li'Vre de /a
Pirie et de fa Mort, more especially of the story therein, Tanle Claire nous quitle,
This story becomes La Mort de Latente Obscure (phonetically, La T ante
Obscure).
All the words in italics in this chapter are quotations from the above-
mentioned book (sometimes the order is transposed in the cause of the
pataphysical analogy).
34. Loti's dedication of Le Li'Vre de fa Pilie et de fa Mort actually reads: "A rna
mere bien-aimee J Je de die ce livre J Sans crainte, parce que la foi chretienne lui
permet de lire avec serenite les plus sombres chases." And the author's preface
130
begins: "Ce livre est encore plus moi.
3'5. "It would b. . you so, if only you knew!" The dosing words of Loti's pref-
ace (addressed to his literary enemies, imploring them not to mock a theme
which is "sacred" to him!) are in fact "iJ vous ennuiera tant, Sl vous saviez!" Jarry
has simply en. rd, which ambiguity I have preserved in the English.
36. "I alone ... ABYSS": transcribed literally from Loti's story Reve, except that
Jart"y places the last two (significant!) words in capital letters.
37. Super-patriotic poets ot the era, A mirliton is a "toy musical instrument with
vibrating parchment reinforcing the voice, usually adorned with strips of paper
and humorous verse," "Vers de mirliton" is a phrase meaning vulgar doggerel
or trashy verse,
38, Sic.
39. Kaka-San really is the name of a character in Loti's story La charlSon des 'Vieux
epoux. Kaka-San and Toto-San are beggars, and T ota-San draws Kaka-San, who
is paralyzed, along in a box on rollers. She dies eventually in her box, and the
italicized last paragraph of the chapter, which is a quotation from the story,
means exactly what it appears to mean!
CHAPTER 31
The musical jet: a scientific experiment described by C. V. Boys (see notes,
Ch, 6) in his Soap Bubbles (Lecture III) and invoked here by Jarry (in an entirely
pataphysical application, of course).
CHAPTER 32
PIERRE BONNARD: friend of Jarry since 1893, illustrator of Jarry's Almanac/,
du Pere Ubu, and fellow comributor to rhe Re'Vue Blanche.
40. The Musee du Luxembourg, where academic paintings acquired by the State
were exhibited. The "department managers" mentioned by Doctor Faustroll in
131
the following paragraph are identifi:lble as fashionable painters of thc time, all
exhibitors at the Beaux Arts in 1897.
41. "The Poor Fisherman" is by Puvis de Chavannes, "Olympia" by Manct,
42. "How beautiful is yellow!": inspired by Gauguin's text Nature; Mortes, on
Van Gogh, published in 1894, which says: "Oh! oui, il !'a aime Ie jaune, ce bon
Vincent, ce peintre de Ho!!ande; lueurs de soleil qui n!chauffaient son arne, en
horreur du brouillard. Un besoin de chaleur."
43. In the French, "toiles non declouees," which could also mean "pictures sti!!
hanging on the wa!!s."
44. "Discovered" as a painter by Jarry, who probably met him in 1893. From
1894larry wrote articles on Rousseau and published the laner's lithograph of
"La Guerre" in his L'Ymagier. larry lived briefly with Rousseau in 1897 during
one of the former's periodic domestic crises, Rousseau painted a portrait of
Jarry which was exhibited at the Salon des Independants in 1895; a contempo-
rary critic remarked of this painting: "Notice his portrait of a poet (M. Alfred
Jarry) whose hair was so long that the catalogue thought fit to describe the pic-
ture as 'Portrait oEMme. A.J.'"
BOOK SIX
CHAPTER 33
45. An equivocal Latin word, which can signify "a green and living branch," "a
young bough cut off" or in late Latin "a wood-worm." Larousse (19th-c. ed.)
gives the meaning "termite." The sense here is of priapic ejaculation, which
J arry associates in the following chapter to the artistic ejaculation of the "unfore-
seen beast Clinamen" (q,v. notes, eh. 34.)
CHAPTER 34
PAUL FORT: founded the Theatre d'Art in 1891; in 1893 this became the
132
Theatre de 1'Q!uvre, where Ubu Roi was produced by Lugne-Poe in 1896. Fort
edited a review, Le Livre d'Art, which published the first extracts from Ubu Roi,
46. ~'Inclination," "bias." But the cli,!amen principiorum or "swerve" of Lucretius
is a more complicated concept, a phLlosophic theory central to the Epicurean
system which Lucretius explains in De Rerum Natura as follows: Atoms fall head-
long through space, carried on by their own weight. At undetermined moments
and in undetermined points of space, they manifest a minute quasi-deviatioll,
only just sufficient for one co be able to speak of a modification of equilibrium.
Itis as a result of this "swerve" or clinamen that so-called solid bodies are formed
from the atoms or primordia. Lord Kelvin (see notes, Ch. 37) claims (in his essay
Stepr towards a kinetic theory of matter) the ideas of Epicurus and Lucretius as the
basis of the modern theory of matter, in which all its properties are seen to be
merely attributes of motion.
47. "Woan't yew p'-lay with me, mistuh Loyal?": in French "voulez-vous jouYer
avec moa, mister Loya!?" the dialect indicating the fact that the great clowns in
French 19th-century circus \Vere English. "Mister Loyal" is, in French circus
parlance, the traditional name of the blue-coated Equestrian Director, and the
sentence is a classic part of the duologue between a down and this ringmaster.
The name is derived from a famous circus family.
BOOK SEVEN
CHAPTER 35
48. In English in the original.
49, "Maul''' (mourre) means "muzzle" and is found in Rabelais (III, 20). The
word "zencle" was invented by Rabelais (I, 12) from the Greek word for
"sickle, "
50. John T ynda!l, 19th-century Irish physicist, whose chemical experiment with
133
vacuum tubes is referred to by Kelvin (see notes, Ch. 37) in his PopIIlar ucture$
etnd Addresses as "Tyndall's blue sky."
CHAPTER 36
FELIX FENEON: writer and a collaborator on the Re'Yue Blanche, one of the first
to encourage Jarry as a writer.
51. Arthur Cayley, 19th~century English mathematician, one of whose experi-
ments (relative to the law of variation) is quoted by Kelvin, op. cit.
52. "The Morgue. , . slab .. ," might also be rendered "Pride displayed for two
days on her lectern.. "
BOOK EIGHT
LOUIS DUMUR: playwright and one of the founders of the Mercure de France,
The reason for this dedication is certainly the long article which Dumur wrote
on Ubu Roi in the Mercure in 1896.
53. "A light sip will incline one to philosophy, possibly to atheism, but a fuller
draught will lead one back to religion."
CHAPTER 37
LORD KELVIN: i,e. Sir William Thomson, English physicist whose Popular
Lectures and Addresses, Vol. I, Constitution of Mettter, 2nd (enlarged) edition,
London, 1891, was translated into French in 1893, and which Jarry interprets
from a pataphysical standpoint while adhering closely to the letter - if not the
spirit - of the original. He makes usc especially of the chapters Electrical units
of measurement, Steps towards a kinetic theory of matter and The wave theory of light.
The reader is referred to the above-mentioned work for a full appreciation of
134
Jarry's splendid interpretation of Kelvin. As (wo e:.:amples OUt of many, com-
pare Jarry, the sentence beginning at the bottom of p. 100, with Kelvin, op. cit.,
p. 80: "I often say that when you can measure what you are speaking about and
express it in numbers you know something about it"; and Jarry, the next sen-
tence on p. !01, with Kelvin, p, 81: ". , . diamond is reckoned harder than ruby;
ruby than quartz; quartz than glass hard steel. .. "
The llames mel1tioned in this chapter are all those of distinguished scien-
tists - astronomers, physicists, mathematicians metltioned by Kelvin. Needless
to say, the measuring rod, the watch, the tuning fork, the luminiferous ether,
the rotating flywheels and linked gyrostats, even the Scottish shoemaker's wax
arc to be found seriously expounded in the pages of Kelvin in cOllnection with
practical scientific experiments,
54. "Centimeter gramme second" (the unit of force defined in terms of the units
of mass, length, and time).
55. The tide of one of the chapters in Popular Lectures, describing the experi-
ment in "dissipation of energy" of James Clerk Mall:well, the Scottish physicist.
56. This amount of a centimeter is the wave length. of yellow light in the spec-
trum (Kelvin, pp. 144seq,)
57. A centimeter.
CHAPTER 38
The title of this chapter is derived from the essay On the sun's heat from Kelvin,
op. cit. In this essay Kelvin does indeed describe th.e sun as "a cool solid," and
the squares, pyramids, screws, paddles and other paraphernalia are all invoked
by him to illustrate his scientific expositions.
58. Compare Kelvin, op. cit., pp. 118-119, " .. the Siemens unit in absolute
measure is 9,413 kilometers per mean solar second."
135
59. This refers to Kelvin's remark at the beginning of his essay The six gateways
of knowledge (op. cit. p. 261): "I am going to prove to you, that we have six
senses - that if we are to number the senses at all, we must make them six. n
60. Even this superbly poetic paragraph is derived directly from Kelvin, in his
essay The wave theory of light (op cit., p. 341), describing a phenomenon known
in physical optics as "Haidinger's Brushes."
CHAPTER 39
61, Caesar-Antichrist is a "drama" by larry originally published in 1895 by the
Mercure de France.
CHAPTER 40
62. Sic.
CHAPTER 41
ANNA KATHERINA EMMERICK: an unlettered mystical fantasist, who produced
some highly imaginative revelations of the life of Christ (e.g. Meditations all the
Passion) under the influence of divine inspiration.
The final sentence, "Pataphysics is the science ... ": In the original, "La
Pataphysique est la science ... " The French may be translated with important
differences in nuance; either as the beginning of a deliberately unfinished sen-
tence ("Pataphysics is the science ... ") or, if one takes it to be a complete
sentence, it might equally well read "Pataphysics is science, ," Let this remain,
textually, the final pataphysical mystery.
In the original MS of Faustroll, the last words of the book are followed by
the word END in the center of the page, and, underneath this, Jarry's remark:
"This book will not be published integrally until the author has acquired suffi
cient experience to savor all its beauties in fUll." (See illustration on inside back
cover .)
136
IE[ lB!f.[ ({Hill\{ A ] P> !HI Y
BY ALASTAIR BROTCHIE
It is thirty years since the first appearance of the English translation of Faustroll,
and this period has seen no slackening of interest in Jarry's works in either
France or the English-speaking world - quite to the contrary. In view of this,
Simon Watson Taylor has suggested Iprovide a brief bibliography covering the
years since 1965 to accompany the republication of his translation. This list is
not intended to be exhaustive, the bibliographies below should be consulted by
readers requiring more detailed information.
BIBLIOGRAPHIES
RAMEIL, CLAUDE: Alfred}arry, essai de bibliographie critique, in L'Etoile-Absinthe,
112,1979; 4,1979 and 7/8,1980. (L'Etoile-Absinthe is the journal of the Societe
des Amis d'AIp-edjdrry.)
BORDILLON, HENRI: Bibliographie Generale, ill Alfred}arry, Oeuvres completes,
com. III, "Pleiade," Gallimard, Paris, 1988.
BROTCHIE, ALASTAIR: larry et l'Angleterre, in L'Etoile-Absinthe, 46, 1990.
(Listing of English translations and critical works in English.)
137
GENERAL WORKS ON JARRY
ARNAUD, NOEL: Alfred}arry, d'Ubu roi au docteur Faustroll, La Table Ronde,
Paris, 1974. (The best biography,)
ARRIVE, MICHEL: Peinillres, gravures el dessins d'Alfred larry, College de
'Pataphysique et Le Cercle du livre Franr;ais, Paris, 1968, (On Jarry's graphic
works.)
BEAUMONT, KEITH: Alfred}arry, a Critical and Biographical Study, St. Martin's
Press, New York, 1984. (A good biography in English.)
SHATTUCK, ROGER: The Banquet Years, Harcourt Brace, New York, 1958;
revised edition Vintage Books, New York, 1968.
PRINCIPAL TRANSLATIONS
The Ubu Plays, ed. Simon Watson Taylor, trans. Cyril Connolly and Simon
Watson Taylor, Grove Press, New York, 1969.'
The Supermale, trans, Ralph Gladstone and Barbara Wright, New Directions,
New Yark, 1977.
Messa/ina, trans. John Harman, Atlas Press, London, 1985.
Days and Nights, trans, Alexis Lykiard, Atlas Pess, London, 1989.
Caesar Antichrist, trans. Antony Melville, Atlas Press, London, 1992.
Visits of Love, trans. lain White, Atlas Press, London, 1993.
CRITICAL EDITIONS OF FAUSTROLL
Gestes et opinions du docteur Faustroll, 'pataphysician, Fasquelle, Paris, 1911. (The
first, posthumous, edition.)
Gestes et opinions du docteur Fallstrol!, 'palaphysician, in Alfred Jarry, Oeuyres com-
pletes, tom. I. "Pleiade," Gallimard, Paris, 1972. (Notes and commentary by
Michel Arrive.)
138
Gestes et opi7lions du docle"r Fal/stroll, 'pataphysician (sllivi de L'AII/our absolu),
"Poesie/' Ga!!imard, Paris, 1980. (Introduction and notes by Noel Arnaud ~nd
Henri Bordillon,)
Gestes et opi7!io7/5du dOclellr Faustroll, 'pataphysician, Cymbalum Pataphysicum,
1985. (The ultimate annotated edition: 280pp. of notes to 93 pp. of text!)
CRITICAL TEXTS ON FAUSTROLL
BEHAR, HENRI: Les Cultures deJarry, PUF, Paris, 1988,
BESNIER, PATRICK: Alfred Jarry, Pion, Paris, 1990. (The author uses the
Equivalent Books from Faustrol! to construct J arry's "self-portrait.")
EHRICH, RIEWART: Docteur Faustroll et Diogenes Teufelsdroeckh, in L'Etoile-
Absinthe 49/50,1991.
GA YOT, PAUL: Les Problemes du FaustrolI, in AlfredJarry, CoUoque de Cerisy,
Belfond, Paris, 1985.
LAUN01R, RUY: Clefs pour la 'Pataphysique, Seghers, Paris, 1969,
PETITFAUX, GEORGES: De la Surface de Dieu, in Subsidia Pataphysica, 22, 1973.
STILLMAN, LINDA: Physics ad Paraphysics: The Sources of Faustroll, in Kentucky
Romance Quarterly, XXVI, 1, 1979.
VARIOUS: Na)!igati071 de Paustroll, a special issue of the Cahiers du College de
'PataphY5ique, 22/23, College de 'Pataphysique, 1956.
139
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