Wallo 1

Alex Wallo
Professer Agee
Writing 1010
6 November 2014
Love vs Infatuation
Many people in the contemporary culture are under a grave misapprehension concerning
the nature of love as contrasted to mere infatuation, or desire. The latter is often equated with the
former, and the traditional, rich definition of love as a result has become faded to where the word
love is now simply used as a more attractive synonym for what is really meant by infatuation,
or desire. The real distinction between love and infatuated desire must be made transparent so as
to safeguard the richness of the true and authentic virtue of love, such that mere infatuation and
desire can never obfuscate or pollute such a precious gem of human nature.
What exactly is infatuation? Infatuation or desire can be defined as a fleeting, superficial
passion for something or someone. It is typically driven by sensual biochemistry and thus
occupies the sensitive part of the human soul. Infatuation, as opposed to extending outward from
the self to the other, sinks to the self. It emerges from a lack, or privation, which can only be
satisfied or filled by something external to the individual, whether it be loneliness, arousal,
hunger, or any other such passion. Infatuation thus refers to a fleeting, strong, fascination with a
particular thing that satisfies a particular passion.
While this is not mutually exclusive to love, love is drastically distinct from infatuation.
For love does not occupy the sensitive aspect of the soul, but the rational, which is the highest
faculty in Man. Saint Thomas Aquinas defined love as the effective willing of the objective good

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of the other (ST I, Q. 20, art. 3, co.). Love is not, therefore, like infatuation, a fleeting passion or
desire, but an act of the will of Man, governed by his natural reason. It proceeds from the
intellect and is executed through the will, and is oriented necessarily toward truth, for the good of
the other is fixed according to his or her nature. Contrary to infatuation, which proceeds from
sense, love proceeds from the intellect, safeguarded by reason and the eternality of what is
authentically true and good. Infatuation, on the other hand, is governed primarily by biochemical
reactions in the body. Of its nature infatuation is not oriented towards what is truly good but
simply sways in accordance with the indeterminate windstorm of the passions. Many couples
today claim to be in love yet in a years time simply abandon one another because they have lost
feelings for one another. This is a perfect example of this false equivalence. For love is confused
with a set of feelings, and once those feelings fade, then love must have faded. This, however, is
a faulty perception of love. Love discerns from the intellect what is objectively good for the
other and is thus necessarily noble, whereas infatuation cares only about its own temporary,
fleeting fulfilment, until it hungers for something else.
Wherefore it is clear that infatuation and love simply cannot under any circumstances be
equated or mistaken for each other. For they, while not necessarily intrinsically mutually
exclusive, ore of themselves opposed to one another when considered in the same respect. Love
is a virtue which transcends the ego and empties it sacrificially for the sake of another, whereas
infatuation can be considered a vice insofar as it puts temporary sensitive satisfaction before the
Good. These two should be explicitly contrasted against each other, not equated, as modern
society seems to be guilty of doing.

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Works Cited
"Summa Theologica." New Advent. Online Edition Copyright, n.d. Fri. 14 Nov. 2014.
<http://www.newadvent.org/summa/1020.htm#article3>