Liverpool Law Rev (2008) 29:6780

DOI 10.1007/s10991-008-9029-6

Working with People Who Are Violent to Their

Partners: A Safety Building Approach
Judith Milner

Published online: 2 August 2008

Springer Science+Business Media B.V. 2008

Abstract This article offers a new perspective on the assessment, treatment and
management of adults who are violent to their partners. Using a worked case
example, it describes how a solution-focused approach is used to develop, and
evidence, safety for all family members.
Keywords Domestic violence
Child protection
Male and female violence

Risk assessment
Safety building
Solution-focused therapy

Introduction: The Agency Context

The work described below is located within a Community Safety Partnership, a
network of statutory and voluntary agencies who are concerned and deal with the
impact of domestic violence. As part of the Partnership, the Domestic Violence
Team (DVT) provides a wide range of services for people experiencing domestic
violence; as well as the more usual refuge and support provision there are also
specialist lodgings for victims of lesbian and gay violence and sanctuary
arrangements are made for people who wish to stay in their own homes.
Judith Milner is a freelance solution focused practitioner who works mainly with men and women who
are violent, adult and juvenile sex offenders, and victims of violence. She acts as Independent Expert in
child protection cases. She is also a senior consultant with Resolutions (Yorkshire) and external
consultant for Barnardos The Junction service for young people whose behaviour is sexually concerning
or harmful. Her recent publications include Women and Social Work 2001; Assessment in Social Work,
2002, 2nd edition; Brief Counselling: Narratives and Solutions, 2002; and Assessment in Counselling,
2004 (all with P. OByrne, published by Palgrave). She has also published Working with Violence.
Policies and Practices in Risk Assessment and Management, Palgrave, 2007 (with S. Myers) and Sexual
Issues in Social Work, Policy Press, 2007 (with S. Myers). Email: judithmilner@tiscali.co.uk
J. Milner (&)
3 Sunnybank Road, Edgerton, Huddersfield HD3 3DE, UK
e-mail: judithmilner@tiscali.co.uk

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This includes the provision of sensor lights, secure doors with peepholes, fencing,
assistance with obtaining non molestation orders, alarms and dedicated telephone
lines. DVT liaises closely with the police, housing departments, health visitors,
social services and solicitors.
DVT also provides support for the partners of men on Integrated Domestic Abuse
Programmes (IDAP) provided by the Probation Service. These programmes are
based on an assumption that domestic violence is asymmetrical and the result of the
abuse of power on the part of men towards known women. Thus interventions are
aimed at re-educating men in groups where they are challenged about their attitudes
towards women, and their presumed denial and minimisation, and their partners are
supported.1 DVT finds that a substantial number of men fail to complete a
programme, but still ask for help in overcoming their violence. The reasons for noncompletion put forward by the menand their partnersare that they find the
programme unduly repetitive, inappropriate to their circumstances, and unnecessarily confrontational. For these men, and their partners, DVT makes a referral to
Resolutions (Yorkshire), a small consortium that offers solution focused therapy
(SFT) to people who are violent, and their partners. This alternative method is
described below, using a worked case example.

The Method
Solution focused therapy has no specific theory on the nature of domestic violence,
acknowledging that women can be violent to their partners2 and that men and
women can both be violent within their relationships,3 as well as the more usually
discussed male-on-female violence. SFT accepts that domestic violence is complex
and that there are many situational determinants, thus it is interested in the meanings
of violence to the people involved and their capacity for change, emphasising the
importance of determining what safety will look like for everyone involved. What
safety actually consists of, and how it will be evidenced, can be difficult to
determine so all the concerns are listed and then everyone involved is asked what
the violent person/s will be doing differently when the concerns no longer exist.
These indicators of safety are framed in clear behavioural terms so that there is no
confusion between inputs (prescribing a programme of therapy), outputs (attending
a programme), and outcomes (behavioural change). Outcomes are the new
behaviours expected (for example, s/he has developed constructive ways of dealing
with stresswhich can be detailed, evidenced and confirmed). People who have
been on the receiving end of violence find no difficulty in saying what safety will
look like to them (for example, s/he will be listening to me, talking to me in a quiet
voice, staying sober, etc.). Professionals often find it a little harder to describe what
1

Dobash et al. (2000).

See, for example, Pearson (1997); McKeowan et al. (2001); Fitzroy (2002, pp. 734); on the incidence
of female-on-male violence; Muptic et al. (2007, pp. 753774); on violence in same sex relationships see
Renzetti (1992) and Leventhal and Lundy (1999).

Milner (2008, pp. 2751).

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safety looks like, probably because they have been encouraged to focus on risks.
Where there are no indicators of safety, it is clear to the violent person as well as
professionals that there is dangerousness. The violent person then has a choice
between accepting restrictions and constraints or changing their behaviour.
SFT is based on the idea that all problems have exceptionstimes when the
problem could have happened but somehow did notso the starting point with
people who are violent is to identify the times they could have abused someone but
controlled themselves instead. Therapy focuses on the details of when and how
these exceptions occurred, utilising the strengths used by the person in these
instances to develop more safety for everyone in their family. The emphasis is on
solutions so the approach is future oriented, helping the violent person to find more
satisfactory ways of being in their relationships. It accepts that people are able to
move forwards without necessarily looking at the past in depth and offers them
invitations as to how they wish to be in the future.
SFT has no position on treatment format. Domestic violence is relational in
complex ways; for example, although people want the violence to stop, they rarely
want the family to be split up.4 Thus the practitioner works with the whole family
either separately or together, whilst taking care to ensure the safety of all vulnerable
family members. Safety precautions range from the sanctuary arrangements detailed
above, to the provision of safe supervised contact where couples are separated, to
emotional safety where they attend sessions together. Partners often turn up
unannounced at sessions, sometimes with small children in tow, so the practitioner
ensures that vulnerable family members are enabled to speak freely and safely. As
the method is attempting to determine each violent persons unique solution to the
problem, the programme of work is completely individualised. There is no notion of
a predetermined number of sessions where set topics are covered. Setting topics
would be an expensive use of resources as many violent people already know how
they should be behaving even if they havent yet managed to find ways of doing it,
so the content is set in negotiation with each family member, and other professionals
where they are involved. Professionals often anticipate denial and resistance but
violent people have good reasons for this behaviourshame, fear of the
consequences, possible loss of a relationship, etc, so the practitioner waits for
disclosures to emerge as the violent person begins to trust the therapeutic process.5
Therapy ceases when all concernedthe violent person, the vulnerable family
members, and professionalshave clear evidence that more constructive ways of
behaving have been demonstrated and evidenced. A successful outcome could be
that the family is safely reunited; equally it could be that the couple have negotiated
a constructive parting and have developed ways of safe and cooperative parenting.
To illustrate how the method works, the practice principles of the approach are
now outlined in detail, using a typical case example.

See, for example, Lipchik and Kubicki (1996, pp. 6598); Milner and Jessop (2003, pp. 127141);
Milner (2004, pp. 79101); Milner and Myers (2007, pp. 1929) and Milner (2008).

Lord and Willmott (2004, pp. 5161).

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The Case Example6

Danny is a thirty four year black man who left school and residential care at sixteen
without qualifications. He dealt in cocaine for many years but recently stopped at
the request of his partner, Helen, a twenty eight year white woman. She has a higher
education qualification but has been a working girl for the past five years. They
have been together four years and have an eight month baby girl, Joelle. Danny has
two older children to two previous partners and Helen has three older children to
one previous partner. Danny is an occasional cannabis user and regular beer drinker.
Helen is an occasional cocaine user.
Danny has beaten Helen on three occasions, the last one including a knife slash to
her face. Her mother called the police, who informed social services, and Joelle has
been removed from their care. At the Interim Care Order proceedings, Danny
threatened social workers as they left court, and they are now so afraid of him that
they visit in pairs. Currently Joelle is in foster care and social services have
instigated parallel planning for rehabilitation and adoption. Danny and Helen have
supervised contact four days a week for two hours in the afternoon. As Helen has
refused to separate from Danny, his solicitor recommended that Danny attend
a course of anger management. The couple attend the first session together.

The Practice Principles of a Safety Approach

Understanding the Position of Each Family Member
Preliminary discussions with the social workers revealed that they saw Danny as
violent due to his dysfunctional childhood and Helen as an unfortunate victim.
They were at a loss to understand why she would not choose her baby daughter over
him, regarding both of them as being in denial. Although dubious about the
possible effectiveness of any work with Danny, a good outcome of the work for
them would be that Danny shows he understands the impact of his violence on both
Helen and Joelle, to which end they expect him to explore factors in his childhood
that have led him to be violent, and to be able to sit down with them [the social
workers] in a non confrontational manner and discuss these openly.
Listening to Danny and Helens account reveals a more complex picture; they
both position themselves as victims and as complicit in the violence. They see
themselves as victims of an insensitive child protection service: Danny is unable to
find work to support Helen because of the contact arrangements, he is outraged that
he is allowed to see his and Helens older children from their previous relationships
unsupervised (its as though they dont count), and he is aggrieved that social
workers expect him to attend assessment interviews at their office as this was
previously a childrens home where he suffered physical abuse. Returning to this
building brings back memories of the abuse which, combined with his distress at
6

As this is a case involving child protection concerns, certain details have been changed to ensure that
the family is not identified.

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losing Joelle, makes it difficult for Danny to sit calmly through sessions with social
workers. Helen sees herself as contributing the Dannys violence with her
unreasonably jealous behaviour; to test his commitment to her she demanded that
he give up dealing as she feared that some of his customers paid with sexual
favours. Although he did this, she was still was possessed with jealous thoughts and
tested his commitment further by disappearing with another man for several days
and boasting about it on her return home. Of the knifing episode, she says I didnt
deserve it, but I did ask for it. I wound him up. She is also frustrated with contact
arrangements as she knows that Danny dislikes her being a working girl but she
cant give this up at the moment as it supplies the only income they have. She also
excuses Dannys threats in court to the social workers on the grounds that they both
feel totally powerless and that no-one is listening to them. They are both grief
stricken at the removal of their child and described movingly how they avoid going
past toy shops as this reduces them both to tears. Grief of losing a child is often
mentioned by service users, with fathers talking about walking around with an
empty pram and mothers talking about going into the childs bedroom in the middle
of the night to attend to them even though they know they are not there.
Acknowledging that they have lost their child through their own behaviour in no
way lessens the hollow feeling of loss they experience.
It is important as a solution focused practitioner not to decide between the
various accounts of the violencethey have truth to the various people who hold
these views. Listening carefully to peoples understanding of their situations helps
them move beyond superficial responses,7 and avoids a sullen stand off that is often
instigated by confrontational approaches.8
Finding Exceptions to the Violence
Exceptions are the first indicators of safety and control so it is important to discover
these early on, and expand them. Although Dannys life had been saturated with
violence, both as a victim whilst in care and as an aggressor in his cocaine dealing,
he was not always violent. The most obvious exception is his behaviour around his
children; he had never lost his temper with any of them. This was confirmed by
Helen, and later by accounts of the contact supervisor and the health visitor. This
exception was explored through questions asking him the details of where, when
and how they occurred. Danny explained that it was impossible for him to get
wound up by the children because he is always aware of how vulnerable they are.
He was also able to say how he controlled himself when they were being difficult,
identifying that he was quiet, calm and patient in these situations. This then was the
beginning of a solution to Dannys violence; he was asked how he could develop
and expand these behaviours to other situations. He was able to report at the third
session that he had become aware of Helens vulnerability after watching someone
being beaten on television (when I used to beat her, she whimpered and cried but it
didnt bother me. I carried on till my arm ached. Seeing that woman cowering and
7

Cavanagh and Lewis (1996, pp. 87112).

Milner and Jessop (2003); Turnell and Essex (2006).

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whimpering, that brought it home to me). He also remembered another small

exception: he had never supplied cocaine to any customer who was pregnant. This
indicator of respect for women, even if only at this stage as mothers, was another
possible way towards a solution for him.
As Helen was insisting that her behaviour contributed to Dannys violence, this
was taken seriously and she was asked for exceptions to her extreme jealousy. She
found it very hard to think of any so she was asked to do something differently that
would make a difference, and subsequently decided that Danny leaving his mobile
phone with her would reassure her that he was not dealing, thus reducing her
concomitant fear that he would be sleeping with his customers. Danny was entirely
happy to do this. She also agreed not to insist on the television channel being
changed whenever attractive women appeared on screen, a previous source of
annoyance to Danny who watched a lot of television as way of coping with the
stress of missing Joelle and being unemployed.
Focus on the Goals of all Involved People to Ensure the Safety
of Those most Vulnerable
Establishing clear, measurable and ethical goals is essential to effective solution
focused work with people who are violent, Lee et al.9 found this contributed
significantly to improved outcomes. Violent people find this simple to do; they
mostly want to be normal and where there are child protection issues, they want
social services out of their lives. These goals are developed in the way described
earlier; the concerns are listed and they are asked what safety will look like for
everyone concerned, checking this against professional concerns and goals. Social
workers goals are often so vague that they cant be demonstrated in measurable
terms, as for example the goals mentioned earlier. How would Danny sitting down
with social workers to discuss openly his childhood experiences translate into safe
behaviours with Helen? In what ways would he be different? Dannys goal, shared
by Helen, was to be a normal family, specifically to:

settle down with Helen (he admitted that he had slept around a lot but that Helen
was now his partner for life);
have Joelle back and for them to be a normal family where people all cared for
each other and were happy;
have social services out of his life;
study for a trade so that he could provide for his family without Helen having to
earn money as a working girl; and,
continue to see his older children and for Helens children to visit regularly.

At the same time, he didnt want to give up violence altogether. As he explained,

being a retired drug dealer was a dangerous position to be in; once people knew that
he was no longer dealing, they would have no fear of him and he would lay himself
open to old scores being settled. Thus developing another way of being was
complicated for Danny. He had to develop different personae for different
9

Lee et al. (2007, pp. 3041).

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situations. As a retired dealer, he decided to maintain a front; he would continue to

give people the eye but use a very different eye contact with social workers
(they want me to look them in the eye. Dont they know that when I look someone
in the eye, it means theyve disrespected me and they are going to get it if they dont
back off quick?). Discussing these complexities with Danny in a spirit of genuine
curiosity enabled him to begin thinking about the impact of his physical presence on
peoplehe was a big man.
Helen shared Dannys goals, hoping also that she would get better control of her
jealousy. It was difficult for her to develop a measurable goaltrust defies
quantification, so she settled for feeling more secure about myself. She also
hoped to develop her qualifications and obtain other work.
Discovering Strengths and Resources that can be Used in the Problem Situation
A constant focus on what has gone wrong is discouraging and distressing for people,
especially when it involves a parenting assessment with seemingly endless
questions about things that have gone wrong throughout the participants lives.
Helen found being asked for details of Dannys assaults on her triggered flash backs
and panic attacks, while questions about her previous failed relationships and the
early stages of their relationship triggered her insecurity, fuelling the jealous
thoughts she was struggling to control. Danny resisted talking about his childhood to
social workers as he held previous social workers responsible for his very unhappy
experiences in care. Helens reluctance to talk openly with the assessing social
workers was seen by them as denial and collusion with Danny to hide the reality
of domestic violence so that they could get Joelle back, leading to further
challenging and more reluctance on Helens part. Dannys sullen resistance to
questions about his childhood was seen as further evidence of his dangerousness,
with the social workers making comments that he was using his body language in an
attempt to intimidate them.
A solution focused approach avoids these dilemmas by searching for competencies that can be used in the development of a satisfactory and enduring solution
to the problem. As mentioned earlier, violent people are not violent all the time, and
often run most their lives in a competent and satisfactory manner. It is using and
expanding these aspects of peoples lives that are of interest in solution finding. It
was not difficult to establish Helens competencies; she had a strong sense of self
worth despite the insecurities that led to her jealousy. She was also relatively
untroubled by fear of further assaults. As many women report, it is easier to recover
from a beating than from being emotionally controlled in every aspect of their
lives,10 and Danny had never been emotionally abusive. There had been mostly
happy times with Danny where he had been entirely considerate towards her and
Joelle. The violence had begun when Danny had given up dealing which had made
him virtually housebound and dependent on Helen for money. Helen was also proud
of her academic achievements, obtained through part time study as she brought up
her children.
10

Milner (2008).

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Danny found it much harder to identify any strengths and resources; when asked
what were the good things about himself, he replied there arent any. This is a not
uncommon response from people who are violent. The consequences of their
violence are disproportionate to any immediate benefits in terms of tension release,
especially in the condemnation of the violence by both themselves and others. Being
told repeatedly that you are a bad person means that the person either stops listening
or becomes depressed; either state narrows the persons life and reduces their
chances of finding a solution. One way round this is to ask the violent person what
significant people in their lives would consider to be good about them but Danny
shrugged off Helens positive comments. Neither could he accept that Joelle might
consider him to have good qualities (of course Im good with her, Im her dad. Its
what dads do). So Danny was asked about the hardest thing he had ever done: this
was confirming a residential staff members abuse when interviewed as part of a
large child protection inquiry. From this, the qualities needed to take such a
courageous step were developed and both parents were able to acknowledge that
they had the necessary qualities to survive this difficult period in their lives:
courage, determination, a sense of justice, patience, and consideration for others.
These were all qualities they began to use to overcome frustrations that had led to
resentment and violence. They were also able to talk about happier futures where
their aspirations to be a normal family could be extended to being a successful,
happy family.
Scaling Safety and Progress
In working with domestic violence the first thing to do is assess the level of safety of
the person who has been hurt. Both Helen and Danny were asked a simple scaled
question: if 1 is Helen is not at all safe with Danny and 10 is she is completely
safe, where do you, Helen, put yourself (where do you, Danny, put Helen) on this
scale? Usually a couples ratings are slightly different, the scale allowing the
unsafe person to indicate this without fearing consequences by giving only a slightly
lower rating than the violent person. It doesnt matter what the numbers are as any
difference allows constructive discussion about what the person will be doing
differently when the rating is half or one point higher. Unusually, Danny and Helen
agreed, both rating her safety at 9, Danny on the grounds that there was no way he
would ever risk losing his baby again, if and when he got her back. Helen agreed
with this and said also that she had felt completely safe with Danny since the knifing
incident as he hadnt been getting wound up when she expressed jealous thoughts.
However, Danny did not see this new way of behaving as constructive; he felt it
stemmed more his current depressed state which meant he couldnt be bothered.
This was not, then, a solution that had the potential to be either satisfactory or
enduring.
As Helens jealousy was a significant factor in their relationship, she was asked a
scaled question about it: if 1 is you know for certain that your jealous thoughts are
based on solid fact and 10 is you are absolutely convinced that they are false, where
do you place yourself on this scale?. Danny placed her at 1 and Helen placed

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herself at 3. Danny said that he could rate her higher on the scale when she didnt
carry on every time I make a comment about a good looking woman on
television. Helens ideas about moving up the scale were all to do with Danny
changing his behaviour, most of which were unreasonable in that he could never go
anywhere by himself without accusations of unfaithfulness.
Sexual jealousy is extremely difficult for people to control and does not respond to
reassurances on the part of the partnerthese usually result in demands for further
reassurances and restrictions. Helen continued to find it very difficult to control her
jealous thoughts but Danny found a way of tolerating them, he ignored them. He
demonstrated that he could do this under considerable provocation; after returning
from visiting his daughter from a previous relationship (during which he left his
mobile phone at home so that she couldnt ring him obsessively), she subjected him to
an inquisition that lasted all evening, most of the night and into the morning. She was
not only verbally abusive during this time but she also hit him. Other than telling her
politely to drop the subject, he made no reassurances about his behaviour and ignored
her behaviour as best he could. He reminded her the following morning when her tirade
ceased that it wouldnt be good for Joelle to hear her talking like this and that she knew
he had committed to her when I agreed for us to have a baby. Helen was partly
ashamed of her behaviour and partly pleased that Danny had been tested. Her jealous
thoughts remained but she became more able to stop them getting out of control.
Danny said he loved her enough to put up with them.
They were also asked where on the safety of Helen scale they thought social
workers would rate them. These ratings were much lower than their own and they
talked resentfully about being disbelieved by social workers when they said that
they had no fears of the violence recurring. They were then asked what they would
be doing differently when the social workers could agree that Helen, and Joelle,
were safe. Although they felt it unfair that they had to make all the effort, they knew
that they had to get on better with their social workers, and agreed strategies for this
which used the competencies identified earlier. Instead of waiting for social workers
to contact them they volunteered information, kept appointments on time, were
polite, and remained patient throughout some very intrusive questioning. Sadly the
social workers did not see any improvement. As Scourfield found in his research
into child protection social worker attitudes,11 once a hypothesis is developed, it
tends to remain and the rigid template he found operating in domestic violence
casesmen seen as threat to women and children with women expected to choose
their children over their partners or be considered as failing to protectwas evident
here. Also there was the genuine fear they had of Danny. Danny found the solution
to this problem too; he consulted his solicitor and an independent social worker was
appointed. Danny and Helen had no difficulty in working with this person.
Assessing Willingness, Confidence and Capacity
Government guidance is explicit about the need for social workers to work in
partnership with parents and ensure their effective participation so it could be
11

Scourfield (2003, p. 82).

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expected that social workers understand that parents initial responses will be hostile
and make attempts to set the scene so that motivation can be improved and
constructive relationships established. This often doesnt happen for a number of
reasons: the social worker has prime responsibility for the child not the parents;
common working hypotheses in domestic violence anticipate denial and resistance,
and encourage a confrontational approach; laborious procedures inhibit creative
work; and, in this case example, the social workers were fearful of Danny. When
this happens, the solution focused approach is to determine how best the parents can
improve relationships with social workers and whether they need to increase their
willingness, confidence or capacity to change their behaviour.
This is done by a series of scaled questions. Willingness is assessed by asking if
1 is you cant be bothered and 10 is you will do anything it takes to get your child
back, where are you on this scale?. Similarly, capacity is assessed by asking if 1
is you havent a clue about what to do differently and 10 means you know exactly
what to do to change, where are you on this scale?, and confidence is about their
confidence in their ability to change. Not surprisingly in view of their resentment at
how they were being treated by social workers, Danny and Helen scored lowest on
the willingness scale, although their capacity ratings were low until they were
reminded of their competencies. Increasing their willingness was introduced by
asking them what they would be doing differently when they were one point higher
on the scale and linking this to the safety of Helen scale mentioned above. Letting
resentments go was an important part of their growing ability to engage with the
family assessment process.
Joelle was returned to her parents care and there has no been no further violence,
but the whole process would have been a pleasanter experience for all concerned
had everyone been clear from the outset about exactly what was expected of these
parents, and how it would be evidenced, that would convince the professionals that
it was safe to close the case. Where parents are unable, or unwilling, to provide this
evidence, then it is clear to both them and others that they cannot reasonably expect
to be allowed to care for their child. A sample preliminary safe care plan which
would outline the essential safety indicators, and thus structure the work, for a
couple such as Danny and Helen is appended.
Although these practice principles are described discretely and sequentially
above, in therapy they are woven together, with the focus shifting depending upon
which element is most relevant at each session. For example, searching for
exceptions is more likely to occur in earlier sessions, although scaled questions are
useful throughout. Goal setting is begun in early sessions but is revisited regularly as
parents goals widen, and sometimes to accommodate social workers changing the
goal posts when early demands are met. This latter is frustrating for parents and,
although a good test of anger control, it is best if the solution focused therapist can
establish what social workers will consider to be a good outcome of their workin
detailat an early stage. This is not an easy process as social workers, and courts,
are expected to frame their concerns in terms of risk rather than safety. The
situational and relational aspects of domestic violence make risk assessment a very
inexact science. A study of 840 men who attended a domestic violence programme

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in the US found that the differences between re-offenders and non-reoffenders are
not substantial enough to predict or identify high-risk offenders.12

Outcomes
A solution focused approach to working with people who are violent may seem to
be counterintuitive: how can the problem be sidelined without grave consequences,
surely past behaviour is the best indicator of future behaviour, how can a solution
not necessarily be linked directly to the problem? Strange though the method may
seem, it actually works. Three year follow up of over 100 adults following a solution
focused programme shows a success rate of approximately 7375 percent, with a
drop out rate of approximately 2527 percent.13 Other research into the use of SFT
with a variety of violent offenders has found it similarly effective.14

Conclusion
This article suggests that a solution focused approach to working with violence
increases effectiveness because it bypasses tensions and difficulties inherent in more
traditional approaches. Particularly it avoids confrontation, recognising that this is
negatively related to behavioural change.15 Instead it promotes genuine partnership,
responsibility taking and clarity about safety.

Appendix
A sample preliminary safe care plan for Joelle and Helen
Concerns

Safety

1. Danny has beaten Helen badly on

3 occasions, including one knifing,
therefore there are concerns about
Helens safety. All these assaults
followed arguments about faithfulness

1. Helen will be safe when Danny has found other

ways of responding to Helens jealousy. Helen
will have better control over her jealous thoughts.

2. Joelle was not in the room when the

assaults took place but her emotional
well-being would be endangered if
she is brought up with violence

2. Danny and Helen will be peaceable and calm

around Joelle. They will talk to each other
politely.

12
Gondolf and White (2001, pp. 361380). For a fuller account of the problems in risk assessment, see
Milner and Myers (2007).
13

Milner (2008).

14

Turnell and Edwards (1999); Milner (2004); Milner (2008); Milner and Myers (2007); Lee et al.
(2003, 2007); Myers (2005, pp. 97112); Turnell and Essex (2006).

15

Gondolf (1998, pp. 6465, 8789); Marshall (2003, pp. 2530); Gadd (2004, pp. 173197).

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Appendix continued
Concerns

Safety

3. Danny has threatened social workers with

violence. and contact supervisors both verbally
and non verbally.

3. Danny will be polite and respectful with social

workers

4. Danny is depressed at being out of work and

stuck in the house

4. Danny will be in work or training for a job.

5. Danny and Helen are grieving for their daughter 5. Danny and Helen will be handling the, hopefully,
and this is adding to their stress levels.
temporary loss and supporting each other.
6. Danny does not like Helen being a working girl. 6. Helen will be in other work or training.
This adds to his stress

Goals
Social services goals are for Danny and Helen to demonstrate that the safety
indicators listed above are present.
Danny and Helens goals are for Joelle to be returned to their care, social services
out of their lives, and live a normal life.
Current Indicators of Safety
1.
2.

3.

4.
5.

Helen says she feels safe now and this is evidenced in how she can talk freely
about events in front of Danny and tell him what she wants.
Danny has never lost his temper with any of his children. Children do not stress
him out. This has been confirmed by Helen, health visitors, and contact
supervisors.
He has given up dealing in cocaine. This has been confirmed by him moving to
a new address, avoiding old customers and getting rid of his old mobile phone
number. Police checks reveal no evidence of current dealing.
He accepts that his actions led to Joelle being removed from his care and this
has been a wake up call for him.
Contact supervisors report that both parents are capable of meeting Joelles
needs. They are not afraid of Danny, who is always punctual, polite and
considerate.

Action Plan
1.

2.

Danny will be offered therapy to help him learn how to control his temper and
handle stress. A good outcome of the therapy will be that Danny is peaceable
and calm, and can talk to people politely, even when stressed.
Helen will be offered therapy to help her learn to control her jealous thoughts.
A good outcome of the therapy for Helen will be that she feels more secure
about herself and can control her jealous thoughts.

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Working with People Who Are Violent to Their Partners

3.
4.

5.

6.

79

Contact arrangements will be varied so that the parents can obtain work or
training. They will be offered guidance and assistance in obtaining suitable work.
Social services will support the parents in their grief at being parted from Joelle
by ensuring that they are given full information about Joelles life in the foster
home, consulted about any issues that may arise concerning Joelles well-being,
and involved in her care as much as is practically possible.
As far as possible, appointments for the parenting assessment will be arranged
around the parents existing commitments. Social workers will be sensitive to
both parents possible reactions to talking about earlier abusive experiences.
If social workers have any other concerns they will explain these to Danny and
Helen promptly.

Time Frame
Joelle is developing rapidly and a decision about her future cannot be delayed too
long. The expectation is that the parents will demonstrate safety within a time frame
of four months, progress to be reviewed monthly.
Social Services will be confident enough to return Joelle to her (monitored)
parents care when the parents have demonstrated that all the indicators of safety
listed above are in place. They will be confident enough to close the case when these
changes have been sustained over a period of six months. Should safety not be
demonstrated, the plan will be for Joelle to be placed for adoption.

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