Revelation by Liz Lochhead: Exemplar Essay

Essay Question: Choose a poem in which the

creation of mood or atmosphere is an important
feature. Show how the poet creates the mood or
atmosphere, and discuss its importance in your
appreciation of the poem.

Task One
Below is a candidate response to the question above. You are going to
read this essay and underline every instance where the candidate has
made reference to the question on sinister mood. The introduction has
been done for you.

Exemplar Introduction:
Revelation by Liz Lochhead is a poem which creates a sinister
atmosphere. The poet recounts an event which happened to her as a
child. She visits a nearby farm for eggs and milk where she is introduced
to a bull. The bull is tethered by a heavy chain in a dark outhouse. The
narrator is horrified by the animal and to her it becomes apparent that this
bull represents evil that is present in the world. As the poem develops, the
young narrator is made aware that that world is a more dangerous and
frightening place that she had previously thought. This is the revelation
mentioned in the title. There is a transformation from naivety to
awareness: she realises the world is full of evil and the bull comes to
embody the evil that is all around. Lochhead establishes this sinister
atmosphere successfully through expert use of techniques such as word
choice, onomatopoeia and symbolism.

Paragraph One
The poem begins with a sinister mood created by the first impressions of
the young narrator when she is introduced to the bull on her visit to a
farm to collect eggs and milk.
They called him Bob - as though perhaps
1

you could reduce a monster

with the charm of a friendly name.
At the threshold of his outhouse, someone
held my hand and let me peer inside.
She comments that despite the fact They called him Bob, which might
suggest or give the illusion that the bull is friendly and unthreatening, she
can see that that, by contrast, the bull is in fact a monster. The use of
metaphor begins to develop the sinister mood of the poem as we see from
the childs point of view that the bull is frightening, threatening,
dangerous and huge. The contrast helps prepare us for the change in
perspective that is about to be experienced by the young narrator. She
describes herself on the threshold and the word choice helps convey
that new territory is about to be discovered; she is about to step into the
unknown and this also helps to build a sense of foreboding. This mood is
continued when the reader learns the little girl is scared about being
introduced to the bull, someone held my hand. This helps reveal that
she needed reassurance and comfort as she fells vulnerable and was
afraid to be alone with the bull. The word choice of peer also contributes
to the sinister mood as it has connotations of uncertainty, mystery and
illustrates that the bull must be approached with caution.

Paragraph Two
Lochhead continues this sinister mood when the young narrator enters the
bulls outhouse and details the terrifying moment vividly of her first
sensual impressions of the bull. At first, she doesnt see him and that
clever description intensifies the sinister mood:
At first, only black
and the hot reek of him. Then he was immense,
his edges merging with the darkness, just
a big bulk and a roar to be really scared of,
a trampling, and a clanking tense with the chains jerk.

The poets word choice of black has connotations of darkness and evil,
associating the bull with evil. The synaesthesia of hot reek illustrates
that the young girls senses are getting mixed as her emotions and fear of
the bull intensify. The word choice of reek also cleverly indicates that the
2

bulls odour is foul and strong which showcases his unpleasant, repellent
and offensive nature. The onomatopoeia of clanking suggests the loud
noise he is making as he struggles to be freed from the chains that bind
him. This cleverly hints that evil, represented by the bull, can perhaps be
unleashed at any moment. The poet also uses he to subtly imply the
bull represents the male sex only; the bull represents s the male threat to
and dominance over females in society. The word choice of trampling
which is a sound associated with violence and suffering. The reader
visualises something big and powerful walking over and destroying
something small and helpless. Thereby suggesting the destructive and
powerful force that evil has in the world and how powerless the young
narrator is in the face of evil. The poet goes on to describe the bulls
behaviour:
He roared his rage. His nostrils gaped.
The use of alliteration with he roared his rage. again suggests the
aggressive and uncontrollable nature of the bull and indeed the evil it has
come to embody. The poet uses short sentences here to create tension
and cleverly reflects the tense moment experienced by the young girl,
again building on the sinister mood.

Paragraph Three
Later in the poem, the sinister mood reaches its climax when Lochhead
leaves the outhouse and reflects on what she has seen. She had already
guessed at the potential in the world for anarchy, chaos, lack or order and
injustice all the things we all fear. From this significant moment, the
young child is aware that darkness and evil are always present,
symbolised by the bull.
that Black Mass, straining at his chains.
I had always half-known he existed this antidote and Anti-Christ his anarchy
threatened the eggs, well rounded, self-contained and the placidity of milk.

The poet uses capital letters for Black Mass which emphasises the
importance of the connotations for both Black being associated with evil
and chaos and Mass hinting at the overwhelming size and strength of
evil in the world. The word choice of antidote suggests that she has
somehow been cured of innocence by the bull and discovered a darker
truth about life, which may in the long run be knowledge required for her
3

own good so she knows that she will need to try and protect herself for it
and be vigilant for it. The metaphor of Anti-Christ suggests the bull is
associated with hell and once again consolidates the idea that the bull is
the embodiment of evil. Lochhead uses the symbolism of eggs to
represent childhood innocence and being unblemished yet fragile.
Therefore the word choice of threatened helps the reader understand
that the narrators innocence is in danger of being shattered by the
realisation of evil being present in the word. She also employs the word
choice of placidity of milk to suggest that the milk represents comfort,
safety, calmness and nurture. The reader too learns that this is vulnerable
to contamination by evil at the end of the poem. It is at this moment when
the sinister atmosphere is at its most intense in the poem.

Paragraph Four
The sinister mood is sustained until the very end of the poem where the
young narrator fleas the farm. She is now aware that her well-being is
under threat. She has realised the fragility of her innocence in the
presence of danger and evil in the world.
I ran, my pigtails thumping on my back in fear
past the big boys in the farm lane
who pulled the wings from butterflies and
blew up frogs with straws.
The word choice of ran illustrates the terror experienced by the young
narrator who is terrified from her newly acquired knowledge of evil. The
onomatopoeia of thumping also reminds us of a heartbeat and
illustrates the anxiety and fear that would be pumping through the young
narrators body. The poets clever use of alliteration big boys reminds us
of the black bull and allows the reader to make a link between their
cruelty and the bulls evil nature. The nasty images of pulled the wings
from butterflies, suggests that what the boys are doing to the small,
defenceless creatures is just as brutal and vicious as the bull appears to
the girl and her own vulnerability to being hurt by evil forces in the world.
The butterflies are weak and vulnerable to the violence and power of the
boys as is the girl feeling weak and vulnerable to the immense and
terrifying power of the bull and all it symbolises. Again, it is significant
that the cruel perpetrators are male and that females are vulnerable to
their dominant strength and power. The female narrator sees that the
world is full of danger for sex:
Past thorned hedge and harried nest,
scared of the eggs shattering

The word choice of thorned again has connotations of pain and violence
and the image of the eggs shattering symbolises the fragility of females
and how easily they may be damaged by violent males. The cruel images
and violent word choice serve to add to the poems dark and sinister tone.
Conclusion
In conclusion, Liz Lochheads Revelation creates a sinister mood. (TART)
The reader soon realises, through Lochheads clever word choice,
onomatopoeia and symbolism, (TECHNIQUES) that the bull represents evil
in the world (IDENTIFY THEME) and the girls childhood experience
changes the way she sees the world: she now becomes aware of the evil
all around her, represented by the black bull. This childhood experience is
significant as the child becomes aware that the world is not truly safe and
loses the innocence and naivety that she had prior to the visit to the farm.
(SUM UP). This engaging and powerful poem creates a sinister atmosphere
throughout which she illuminates the theme of evil, which too is ever
present in our society. (MESSAGE) The reader feels sympathy for the girl,
at this turning point in her childhood, and also feels regret that they
themselves cannot retain their own childhood innocence nor defeat evil in
the world. (OPINION/PERSONAL RESPONSE)