Cover Letter

When we got this second assignment, I was a little nervous. I was nervous because I had
a hard enough time with the first assignment that I didnt even know where I was going to start
on this one. I knew that the audience was fairly the same but I didnt know how I would
rearrange what I said in the first assignment into the second assignment. The first assignment
was more about why the ad was persuasive and why I picked it. The second assignment was
more of an actual rhetorical analysis and requires more writing.

Comment [SD1]: Really good cover letter and

reflection. Only thing I ask is that next time you use
the format from the example I gaveits the format
that cover letters would take in the work place.

The first thing I did when I got this assignment was open up my LSA 1 and re-read it and figure
out what I should do with it. I took most of the parts from my LSA 1 and put it into my MWA 1.
Once I did this, I re-arranged certain parts that would make more sense to the instructions of the
paper. The introduction paragraph was hard. I was very confused on whether I should keep it or
not. I decided to keep it just because I couldnt really think of something else. My biggest
problem, when it comes to adding more to something that I have already written, is actually
being able to write more.
If I had to pick a part of my paper that I would like you to focus on it would be my introduction
and my description on Ethos, Logos, and Pathos. I dont feel very confident on my introduction
and I had a very hard time with it. I also dont feel confident with my description of Ethos,
Logos, and Pathos. Mainly Pathos because I dont think I quite wrote the right description of it.
For SLO C, I believe that I made an increasingly amount of progress compared to my last
assignment. I re-read the rhetorical situation and instructions multiple times just to make sure I
understood what I needed to do. I also planned my MWA 1 by using my LSA 1 and focused
greatly on what I needed to take out or add. Once I got a rough draft of my MWA 1 I had my
class peers review my work. Four of them reviewed it and edited for me and told me what I
should add or change. I also had you tell me what I needed to do in order to make sure I got a
good grade on my paper. I feel like there was a lot more collaboration with this assignment then
the last one. Maybe because it was bigger, but also because it was a little harder and confusing.
The feedback that I received from everyone really helped me fix my paper and mold it into the
proper organization and requirements that it needed to be.
I believe that I could still work on SLO G. I used research to get information on the ad, Brand,
amino energies, and also the history of the brand but I believe I could have done some better
research. Usually when I do research I look at the most looked items, or the first few things that
pop up. I never really go deeper into research to see if there are any sites or stories saying
something different than the other. Even though I might need to work on this more, I still feel
very confident in my research abilities and being able to discover new information.
All in all, even though I didnt enjoy this assignment, I still learned from it. I believe I will learn
more as the semester progresses and that is what I am hoping for. I am hoping to receive
feedback that will help me towards becoming a better writer, researcher, and analysis.

Comment [SD2]: Ill leave these comments

below in the appropriate places in the paper.

Austen Mckeithen
Sports Nutrition Ad
02/07/2015
Getting big with sports Nutrition: A Rhetorical Analysis of Sports Nutrition Ads

We all have a certain attraction toward something and we all have interest. The majority
of the worlds population is out of shape and is not well educated on health and nutrition. Most
of us say we will try to be healthy but a lot of times it doesnt happen. Although there are a
majority of people who are not into nutrition, there are also quite a few that are. This ad seems
to be a good example at showing what the human idea of being in shape actually means.

Comment [SD3]: I can see your thesis, but parts

of it are kinda vague, especially the end.

For this ad the rhetorical situation was fairly easy to figure out. The ad was created by
Omni Nutrition (ON). I believe it was created for people who are into working out and who
intend to continue their journey towards reaching they physique goal. Amino acids are vitamins

Comment [SD4]: their

that your body needs and they help provide energy and stamina. The audience that this ad is
leaning towards is young adults who are trying to get into shape and get that lean thick muscle.
The context of this ad would be discovered probably in a nutrition store, GNC, body building
store, a health store, or even a gym. The pretty big swole guy in the background will probably
have people who are looking at the ad react in a positive way. The reason being is because he
looks like hes in shape and that the ON Amino Energy actually works. The purpose of this ad

Comment [SD5]: Doesnt need to be in

quotation marks.

is to promote an energy supplement created by ON and draw in buyers with the background of
the guy who is in shape.
I believe that this ad will make a good paper topic because it is fairly easy to discuss. The guy in

Comment [SD6]: All paragraphs should be

indented.

the back with the big arms and chisling eight pack creates a sense of positive outcome of this

Comment [SD7]: Once again, this IS the paper,

not the proposal. Lets not get meta with the writing
in an essay.

product. The guy looks like he is full of energy and is also holding a pretty heavy weight. The ad
transforms the idea of what the amino energy does into a real life example that shows it works.
I was drawn to this ad personally because I actually use ON Amino Energy. Im always trying
to find new pre-workouts or Aminos but I seem to always come back to this brand because it is
well known, nationally advertised, and I enjoy all the different flavors it has to offer. I also was
drawn to this ad because I am very interested in sports nutrition and working out and the
advertisement made it seem like Im going to look like the guy in the background if I keep using
this brand.
I noticed that many ads that are trying to sell a protein, pre-workout, or a nutrition product
always uses people who look in shape. Not just in shape, but like near-impossible in shape.

Comment [SD8]: Doesnt need to be in

quotations.

They do this but at the same time they make it look like any ordinary person can get this big/cut.
Optimum Nutrition (ON) was established in 1986. It has been around for a while and it was
originally started to produce casein protein powder. As of today ON is universally recognized for
selling Gold Standard 100% Whey protein. Seeing that ON is so universally recognized, creating
an ad for a product wouldnt be so hard. Once people know about it they will be more than likely
to trust it. Especially with big buff guys and lean girls on all of their ads.
This ad uses ethos by having a ripped gym guy in the back ground. It attracts people because in
their mind they are going to think hey, this dude is ripped and looks in shape, maybe I should
get some of this stuff. They arent even going to read anything else because all they see is a
dude in shape and in their mind they will automatically assume thats all they need to know
about this product. It also uses ethos by having the colors of the Amino Energies stand out.

Comment [SD9]: Is this historical summary? It

might serve the essay better by being closer to the
top.

This ad also uses Logos by stating facts on the advertisement. It tells how many calories are in
one serving, how many sugars are in it, and how many grams of Aminos you get in one scoop. It

Comment [SD10]: Like I mentioned in peer

review, all of these need to be their own paragraphs
and fleshed out a little more.

also provides a small written paragraph at the bottom left of it. Pathos is used in this ad because
it reaches out to peoples emotions. The emotions it reaches out to are motivational emotions or
inspirational emotions. The ad makes people want to drop what they're doing and hit the gym
with the amino energies ON provides. The guy in the background inspires people to want to buy
this product because they will they will look like him if they do.
All in all I believe that this ad is a great ad to use to encourage one into getting into the field of
sports nutrition. It states good facts about Amino Energy, provides evidence that knowledge in
nutrition helps the body, and it also creates a great example of what a person should look like if
they intended to follow in the footsteps of others who wanted to become healthy and in shape.
The context of the ad is very well placed and everything seems to correspond to one another in
Comment [SD11]: Your conclusion is solid,
especially the first sentence.

an appealing but yet educational way.

Strong

Good

Needs Work

Weak/NA

Cover Letter (10)

10

Introduction (10)

10

2 1 0

Explanation of concepts (5)

Summary of text (5)

Ethos (20)

20 19 18

17 16 15 14

13 12 11 10 9 8

7-0

Pathos (20)

20 19 18

17 16 15 14

13 12 11 10 9 8

7-0

Logos (20)

20 19 18

17 16 15 14

13 12 11 10 9 8

7-0

Conclusion (10)

10

Bonus awesome point (+1)

Total:84 /100
Austen,
You talked with me about your difficulties with this assignment, and theyre struggles that I can still see
in this draft. Im really encouraging students to use their MWA 1 as their traditional revision for the
Portfolio, and I think your MWA 1 will do very well for that. Well work on this document more during
class this week, but you can also see me during my office hours/make an appointment, or even visit
CAPS. If this is something youre really struggling with, its my job to help you address it.
-SD