Arze

Gender Studies

Andrew
by Andrea Gibson

When I was a kid I would sometimes

Secretly call myself Andrew
Would tug at the crotch of my pants the way
Only pubescent boys do
Ran around pounding on my bare chest like Tarzan
Its not that I thought Id grow up to be a man
I just never thought Id grow up to be a woman either
From what I could tell neither of those categories
Seemed to fit me
But believe me, I knew from a very young age never to say
Hey dad, this adam and eve thing isnt really working for me
I mean, what about all the people in between?
In the third grade lynette lyons aksed me
Where all of my barbies were
I lied and told her I got in trouble
So my mom took them away
I didnt dare say: barbie sucks, lynette!
And for that matter tommy, so does gi joe
I wanna grow into something none of us have ever seen before
And gender is just one of the ways

Name:______________________

Arze

Gender Studies

Were boxed in and labeled before were ever able

To speak who we believe we are
Or who we dream well become
Like drumbeats forever changing their rhythm
I am living today as someone I had not yet become yesterday
And tonight I will borrow only pieces of who I am today
To carry with me to tomorrow
No Im not gay
No Im not straight
And Im sure as hell not bisexual damnit
I am whoever I am when I am it.
Loving whoever you are when the stars shine
And whoever youll be when the sun rises
Yes, I like girls
Yes, I like boys
Yes, I like boys who like boys
I like girls who wear toys and girls who dont
Girls who dont call themselves girls
Crew cuts or curls or that really bad hair phase in between
I like steam rising from the body of a one-night stand
I like holding hands for three months before kissing
I like wishing your body was Saturn
My body a thousand rings wrapped around you

Name:______________________

Arze

Gender Studies

You wanted to be a Buddhist nun once

Last night you held my cervix between your fingers
I thanked gods I dont believe in for your changing
Tell me well be naming our children beautiful and nothing else
Tell Barbie she can go now
Tell gi joe to put his gun down and find a boyfriend
Or a girlfriend
Or a girl/boyfriend
Fuck it, gi joe just needs a friend, yall
I mean, hes plastic
And not even the kind of plastic that bends
I want to bend in a thousand directions
Like the sun does
Like love does
Like time stopped
So the hands of the clock could hold each other
And we held each other like I held these words
For too many years on the tip of my tongue
I am my mothers daughter
I am midnights sun
You can find me on the moon
Waxing and waning
My heart full of petals
Every single one begging
Love me, love me, love me

Name:______________________

Arze

Gender Studies

Whoever I am
Whoever I become
Love me, love me, love me

I Am Poem
I am

I am not

I was

I like

I want

I need

To Live in the Borderlands

Name:______________________

Arze

Gender Studies

Name:______________________

by Gloria Anzaldua
To live in the borderlands means you
are neither hispana india negra espanola
ni gabacha, eres mestiza, mulata, half-breed
caught in the crossfire between camps
while carrying all five races on your back
not knowing which side to turn to, run from;
To live in the Borderlands means knowing that the india in you, betrayed for 500 years,
is no longer speaking to you,
the mexicanas call you rajetas, that denying the Anglo inside you
is as bad as having denied the Indian or Black;
Cuando vives en la frontera
people walk through you, the wind steals your voice,
youre a burra, buey, scapegoat,
forerunner of a new race,
half and half-both woman and man, neither-a new gender;
To live in the Borderlands means to
put chile in the borscht,
eat whole wheat tortillas,
speak Tex-Mex with a Brooklyn accent;
be stopped by la migra at the border checkpoints;
Living in the Borderlands means you fight hard to
resist the gold elixir beckoning from the bottle,
the pull of the gun barrel,
the rope crushing the hollow of your throat;
In the Borderlands
you are the battleground
where enemies are kin to each other;
you are at home, a stranger,
the border disputes have been settled
the volley of shots have scattered the truce
you are wounded, lost in action
dead, fighting back;
To live in the Borderlands means
the mill with the razor white teeth wants to shred off
your olive-red skin, crush out the kernel, your heart
pound you pinch you roll you out

Arze

Gender Studies

smelling like white bread but dead;

To survive the Borderlands
you must live sin fronteras
be a crossroads.

When I Was a Boy

By Dar Williams
I wont forget when Peter Pan came to my house, took my hand
I said I was a boy; Im glad he didnt check.
I learned to fly, I learned to fight
I lived a whole life in one night
We saved each others lives out on the pirates deck.
And I remember that night
When Im leaving a late night with some friends
And I hear somebody tell me its not safe,
someone should help me
I need to find a nice man to walk me home.
When I was a boy, I scared the pants off of my mom,
Climbed what I could climb upon
And I dont know how I survived,
I guess I knew the tricks that all boys knew.
And you can walk me home, but I was a boy, too.
I was a kid that you would like, just a small boy on her bike
Riding topless, yeah, I never cared who saw.
My neighbor come outside to say, Get your shirt,
I said No way, its the last time Im not breaking any law.
And now Im in this clothing store, and the signs say less is more
More thats tight means more to see, more for them, not more for me
That cant help me climb a tree in ten seconds flat
When I was a boy, See that picture? That was me
Grass-stained shirt and dusty knees
And I know things have gotta change,
They got pills to sell, theyve got implants to put in,
theyve got implants to remove
But I am not forgettingthat I was a boy too
And like the woods where I would creep, its a secret I can keep
Except when Im tired, cept when Im being caught off guard
And Ive had a lonesome awful day, the conversation finds its way
To catching fire-flies out in the backyard.
And so I tell the man Im with about the other life I lived
And I say, Now youre top gun, I have lost and you have won
And he says, Oh no, no, cant you see
When I was a girl, my mom and I we always talked
And I picked flowers everywhere that I walked.

Name:______________________

Arze

Gender Studies

And I could always cry, now even when Im alone I seldom do

And I have lost some kindness
But I was a girl too.
And you were just like me, and I was just like you

Name:______________________