Kristiannes Reflection

Through this whole class I have been overwhelmed, frustrated

and wanted to quit on numerous occasions. But during our class
discussions, a little more would sink in and become clearer. I have
been challenged from the beginning! I have never thought so much
about writing as I have in the last 10 weeks. I most defiantly see
writing in a totally new way. Its funny, but now everything I see as far
as writing, music and movies, I look at it and think what genre is that?
In the first few classes when we were talking about genres I was totally
lost, It was difficult to wrap my head around but now I find that it has
sunk in.
Writing out the conventions of different genres helped me understand
it better, being able to see the difference in what makes it different.
I will never think of an argument the same again. What new
concept this was. I have appreciated when you would break things
down, in very simple terms, and use examples! One example that
really stands out is when we made notes of the possible arguments
with the beer bottles. This had me think of things with a more
questioning eye and helped me when I had to find the argument in the
articles I gathered for my paper.
My goal of the course was to become more comfortable writing,
Im still not comfortable but I am defiantly more aware of what goes
into writing. The terms have become more familiar, so every time I
reread the notes of come across a term used its not as foreign as it

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was. I still feel overwhelmed and lost, but there is light peeking
through. The shitty first draft reading assignment is one of my
favorites. It gave me permission to not try and get it right the first
time. In the reading it talked about the first draft is the childs draft
and to just dump. Even calling it my shitty rough draft helped me feel
more comfortable with writing. Wow, so I guess I did accomplish what I
set out to do, which was feel more comfortable writing. I have learned
that my thinking has been very black and white. I had this distorted
idea that when I write something that it needed to be perfect from the
beginning, I learned that everyone struggles in this, Im not alone and
that I can just put shit down and mess with it as I go. I also realized
how judgmental I get when I write.
Journal entry 7-15-15 (second week ) I want to become a more
comfortable writer. I have ideas and experiences in my head (the seed)
but when I try and put them on paper I freeze and the personal
judgments and criticisms pop up and I shut down then procrastinate. I
became very aware of this nonproductive process I had but realize that
I can work through it by just doing it and using the writing tips you
provided. One of those tips is to just attack the paper, and to get it out
and put it down.
The email draft wasnt difficult partly because I was writing it to
someone I know and had a personal relationship with. So that
assignment wasnt so stressful for me. I have to write a lot of emails at

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work so that has given me practice, but I still struggle. When I received
all the artifacts, this is were I really started to struggle. There was so
much information. I ended up with a grant, newsletter, curriculum,
workshop manual, volunteer communications, donor letters, website,
and workshop scripts. It all looked the same to me and I couldnt figure
out the basics of genres, conventions, arguments, blah, blah, blah. But
the cool thing is I can differentiate between them and figure it out. It
makes sense to me! That is exciting!!!
A HUGE lesson was googledocs, and using it. You mentioned this
in our second class and while I heard it, I didnt retain it. But after
experiencing my computer coma, this lesson will stick with me
forever!!! That was almost as bad as getting sentenced to life in prison
(almost). As soon as my computer crashed I heard your voice in the
back of my head saying, Use googledocs! It seems to take a shitty
disaster for me to really learn. I will use googledocs for the rest of my
life!!
I dont think I could say enough about the writing center, they
were so helpful. The primary reason I chose to no longer take classes
online was to get the help I needed trough the writing center. I was
totally uncomfortable to ask for help, but they made me comfortable.
On My first visit Abby helped me with brainstorming ideas for my
paper. She asked me some really simple questions, she wrote them
down and I was surprised by what we had to work with. What we did

Kristiannes Reflection

will help me from here on out on future writing assignments. It gave be

a starting point that helped with a more graceful flow of ideas. On my
next visit, I returned confused again, and we worked through putting
together an outline. I wouldnt have made it through this class if it
hadnt been for Abby and the writing center. I know I defiantly need
that extra support and tutoring. I have even asked my friend Steve to
tutor me He was the Dean of Language and Literature at Palomar
College. We are going to work on my essay for this class, it seemed like
a great way to start. We will be working on googledocs!! He said the
same thing as you did this! So another great lesson for me is to not be
embarrassed to ask for help. I have a tendency to feel very insecure
about my lack of formal education. I guess I have this belief that
because I am almost 50 years old I should be able to have a handle on
the basics of writing!
The basics you went over in class were very helpful, I refer back
to my post on July 28thI was thinking about our last class and remember when Zack
talked about going over the basics and how it was important
even if there are some that are board by the same old thing. I
have been in situations when the facilitator would review what I
thought, was basic and common knowledge, I recall feeling
board and irritated. But quite honestly I am so appreciative of
these basics, because I have never learned them. I havent sat
in a writing class ever, unless you want to count 7th or 8th grade,
and even then I surely wasnt paying any attention.
So while I still stumble and get lost in the conventions of writing, some
of it is becoming familiar, for example the handout and lesson on

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dashes and parallelism. I have the handouts with my notes that I will
refer to. Another weekly process tip that helps is if you want your
writing to improve, do NOT write it in one sitting. Writing something
and then coming back to itletting it simmerhelps!
I learned I need to be more structured and diligent with my studies and
setting enough time aside for them. The feedback I received from the
call helped. I am practicing using stickies on my computerZack tip
and purchased a calendar to write-down all my deadlines and
assignments. Its a challenge getting used to being this organized, but I
know its essential to successfully completing my education!
One last thing that just popped in my head is about the Splitting
the Check handout. It was hard to read something that didnt have
any punctuation. I realized I take punctuation for granted when I read.
When it you asked us to fill in the punctuation I really struggled with
this, this actually surprised me. I assumed it would be easy to just fill in
the blanks and while I got some right, there was a lot I missed. I guess I
have been taking the written work for granted by not taking the time
to really learn the mechanics of it. That is where all this learning comes
in!
The Blog thing tripped me up, thank goodness for my
classmates. This was another area where better time management
would help me. I was also on information overload and didnt give
myself time to process the readings. I also recognize that my

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insecurities about writing would hold me back. I kept thinking how

stupid I would sound when everyone would read what I wrote. Just
another distorted belief I am working through.
So while I have wanted to quit, dropout and give-up I didnt. I
have gotten very frustrated with you and cussed you out in my head.
But with that being said, you have challenged me more than any
teacher I have ever had, and because of that, I believe I learned more
in your class than in any other I have taken. So thank you for
challenging me. It also made a difference when you would say, you
got this, and it helped me believe that I could get it.
The final paper, arrrghhh! When we did the color thing in class
highlighting the thesis statement, evidence, interview data and
analysis in different colors was very helpful. I attempted to do this with
my own draft, and will use this system with future writing. Going over
the notes you made on my paper are helpful, but as I was working on
your suggestions and changing things around I got really confused and
frustrated. I understand what you are saying, and worked to make the
changes you suggested and write on the matrix all the info you
requested. In this process I got lost. I didnt get confused by what you
suggested, I got confused because I kept making changes and lost my
focus and place a few times. While moving things around I accidently
deleted some of your suggestions. So I will turn in the original paper
with your suggestions and the one I attempted to upgrade, just incase

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you get lost too. I would like to request that when you have time if you
could finish going over my paper, I think you got half way and ran out
of time. I want to know what your other thoughts and suggestions are
so that I can learn and eventually become more comfortable with
writing. Its the honest and sometimes harsh feedback that I learn the
most from.
Thank you!