Santa was busy in removing a wheel from auto, Banta asks: Y r u

removing
>a wheel from ur auto?
>Santa: Can't u read 'Parking for two wheelers only'
>***********************************************************************
Santa: Doctor, ye phulon ki mala kis ke liye?
>Doctor: Ye mera pehla operation hai, success hua to mere liye, nahi to
tumhare liye.
>
>***********************************************************************
*
>**********
>Santa joined NASA. After one month the Americans had to change the name
from
>NASA to SATYANASA
>
>***********************************************************************
*
>********
>Santa apni girl friend ko I Luv U kehta hai aur gir jata hai.
>Gal: Yeh kya kar rahe ho?
>Santa: I'm falling in love.
>
>***********************************************************************
*
>***********
>Banta: Yeh chaaku kyon ubaal rahe ho?
>Santa: Suicide karne ke liye
>Banta: To phir ubalne ki kya zaroorat hai?
>Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaaye
>
>***********************************************************************
*
>******
>Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue u've broken.
>Banta: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.
>
>******************************************************************** Lady
Doc: Tum roz subah clinic ke bahar khade ho kar auraton ko kyon ghoorte
ho?
>Santa: Ji aap hi ne bahar likha hai: Auraton ko dekhne ka samay
9am-11am
>
>
>***********************************************************************
*
>**********
>A man to Santa: Aao ji chess khelein
>Santa: Tu chal mein sports shoes pehen kar aaya.
>
>************ ********* ********* ********* ********* *********
*********
>********* *
>At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand,
oh!
>Santa: Control yourself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head.
Is he crying?
>
>************ ********* ********* ********* ********* *********
*********
>********* *
>In an interview,
>Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
>Santa: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. ....
>Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
>Santa: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup...
>
>************ ********* ********* ********* ********* *********
*********
>********* *
>Santa was getting bitten by mosquitoes the whole night. He got
>irritated...
>drank poison & said, Ab kaato saalon, sab maroge!
>
>************ ********* ********* ********* ********* *********
*********
>********* *
>Captain of Military: Naujawanon aage badho..
>Santa aage nahin badha !
>Captain: Tum aage kyun nahin badhe?
>Santa: Apne kaha 9 jawanon aage badho, mein 10ve number pe tha...
>
>************ ********* ********* ********* ********* *********
*********
>********* *
>Banta: Yaar teri wife ki maut ka bara afsos hua, vaise hua kya tha? Sant:
Goli lagi thi mathe main.
>Banta: Waheguru ji ka shukar kar ke aankh bach gayi.
>
>************ ********* ********* ********* ********* *********
*********
>********* *
>Santa apni khoobsurat Bibi k saath car mein baitha. Driver ne sheesha set
kiya.
>Santa gusse mein bola, meri bibi ko dekhkta hai, piche baith, car mein
chalaoonga!
>
>************ ********* ********* ********* ********* *********
*********
>********* *
>Banta: U cheated me.
>Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.
>Banta: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says This is all India
Radio!
>
>************ ********* ********* ********* ********* *********
*********
>********* *
>Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?
>Santa: Tipu's skeleton.
>Tourist: Whose that smaller skeleton next to it?
>Santa: That was Tipu's skeleton when he was child
>
>************ ********* ********* ********* ********* *********
*********
>********* *
>Napoleon: There is no such word as 'Impossible' in my dictionary. Santa:
To dictionary dekh kar kharidni thi ...!
>
>************ ********* ********* ********* ********* *********
*********
>********* *
>Santa was riding on a horse. He jumped the red light & a cop whistles.
Santa lifts the tail of horse & says: 'Le Karle Number Note'
>
>************ ********* ********* ********* ********* *********
*********
>********* *
>Santa: Itne kam marks? Do thappad marne chahiye.
>Pappu: Haan papa, chalo maine us saale master ka ghar bhi dekh rakha hai.
>
>************ ********* ********* ********* ********* *********
*********
>********* *
>Santa dials a number. A girl receives the call.
>Santa: Who r u? Girl: Seeta here.
>Santa: Maine to Chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya..
>
>************ ********* ********* ********* *********
>Q: Why did Santa take his pregnant wife Jeeto to Pizza Hut?
>A: Because they advertised: 'Free Delivery'